url
stringlengths
39
122
text
stringlengths
92
1.52M
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-ace-jessop-love-is-not-real/
Ace Jessop Love is not real I would like to dedicate this book to my English 1 teacher, because if she hadn't inspired me to write this book, i never would have. The kidnapping   The darkness just kept coming. “Why couldn’t it just stop?” I wondered aimlessly to myself, though I knew it was pointless, it would never stop. It’s been dark and rainy here my whole life. “Anna, Anna!” My mother I sighed. She came here when she was 5 years old. “Anna!” she yelled again a little bit of panic in her voice. “I’m in here!” I yelled as I came out of the closet that was my makeshift room. When I came out she had a relieved expression on her face. She was always scared, I was too. “Look what I got” she said a little excited. I tentatively looked inside. Chicken, mashed potatoes and green beans were neatly put inside the bag. “Oh my god, I can’t believe it where did you get it?” “I used the money I’ve been saving, happy birthday, baby girl.” I had forgotten it was my birthday. “Thank you mom, I love it. But you shouldn’t have spent that on me, it must have cost a fortune.” I know, just potatoes cost 100 bucks. “Don’t worry about it Anna. Now let’s eat.” As I ate my small portion of food, I thought about how it used to be. My mother would tell me about the before life, but she always stopped in the middle of happy story of her child hoods. I guess she was just upset that her happy little life was over. I never got a happy child hood, I spent my whole life under ground in a small dugout. There was only light from the small hole in the side of the wall that was our entrance. Mother never let me out, it was always too dangerous. That reminds me I should ask herfor my birthday to let me go outside and just see it I always wondered what outside looked like. I was instantly terrified of going outside, I was used to the cold dark dugout. “hey mom, I was wondering something.” I bravely started. “Yes?” she asked curiously. “Can I go outside” I blurted out. Just like I thought she froze. “Just for a few minutes, please, for my 14th birthday. For me.” I added hopeful. She was still froze. I started to get a little worried. “I guess I knew this day would come.” She sighed. “ok, but you have stay low and in my sight at all times.” She told me worriedly and emphasized the word all. “oh, thank you mom thank you thank you thank you.” I was very excited. Suddenly the chicken I was eating tasted better than I ever tasted before. After supper I wiped the dishes with a fairly clean towel.   I quietly followed Mom outside. I couldn’t believe I was actually going outside this was the most exciting thing in my whole life I thought as I squeezed through the small hole. What I didn’t know was that small movement was going to change my life forever and I didnt even realize it. The sunset was exhilarating and bright it hurt my eyes. It was absolutely beautiful that I had completely forgot everything that mom had told me. I quickly stood up and raced to the grass it was so wonderful I didn’t have any words to explain it. It was everything I ever thought it would be but better much better. I rolled around in the grass for what seemed like two seconds. When I heard some voices yelling and screaming I suddenly sat up. My mother was furiously whispering to me to get back in the dugout. I then realized a moving box was coming towards me it must be a car, it looked like a car that mom had told me about. I stared at it curiously, but when I looked back at my mom, she was silently staring in absolute horror. I immediately sensed the danger. As I got up something smacked me it was now dark it felt like I was sleeping, but at the same time moving. I tried to open my eyes but I couldn’t I felt so exhausted. I laid there feeling pain a sharp pain. I fought hard trying to wake up but it felt like my arms and legs were tied down. I silently slipped into a deep sleep, letting the darkness wash over me. What else could I do?     The Escape When I woke, I was in a lighted room on a thick mat with a thin, white blanket on me. It looked like heaven to me. In the dugout I slept on the dirt floor with a thin raggedy blanket that me and my mom shared when it was winter and cold. There was hardly enough food those days. On a little shelf across the room, there was a tray of food sitting there. I was ravenously hungry  that I ate it all, then I   felt aweful that I hadn’t saved any for my mom. I hope shes all right. I gulped down all of the water as well, I was really thirsty. After I ate, I looked all around the little room and found it quite interesting because the walls were not made of dirt; it was this smooth white stuff everywhere. It felt diferent from the rough, brown dirt I was used to. While I was watching this stuff a girl came in.“ oh, sorry, I thought you were still sleeping “ the girl said. I kept staring at her.“my name is Lily, and I’m the room cleaner.” Lilly continued to say“ m-m-m-my n-n-name is Annie” I stammered.“hello Annie, welcome to the palace, I’ll go tell Mrs. Blanche you’re up now.” She said as she walked out. Later that day I was assigned chores. I was on cleaning rooms with lily, it wasn’t that bad. I also enjoyed the food that was given to us. Mrs. Blanche was real nice and talked about getting me into school, although I’ll have to learn some stuff before I go because I’m ‘sposed to be in the 9th grade and I don’t know how to read yet. I really miss my mother, but they said to not worry about her and that I will get to see her soon. Every day it was washing, ironing, and making the beds, along with sweeping the floor. After a week, I was thouroghly tired of chores, for I never had to do them, when I was living with my mom. I was really missing my mom and couldn’t wait to see her. “what’s wrong” lily asked me one day. “ I miss my mom” I told her. “oh, I miss my mom as well” you have a mom. “ yes, I was taken from her last year.” “why do they take us from our mothers” “because they think they can raise us better” she paused. “come with me, I’m going tonight, I’m leaving and I’m going to go find my mom” she told me. “you can come with if you like.” She continued. “But we’ll get caught” I told her “I’m going to use a passageway, I found it one day when I was exploring this place” “yes, I’ll come with you, but meet me in my room when you are ready, and we’ll take some food with us” “ok then, I’ll see you tonight” Later on that night I heard a knock at the door and rushed to open it. There she was, she had a backpack on and it was full of food. I was going to carry the clothes. “hurry, we must hurry” we wasted no time gathering our stuff. We rushed quietly to the passageway, and once in we ran to the opening. We burst through the small hole and we were on our way to our mothers. Publication Date: November 12th 2013 https://www.bookrix.com/-zpa80b81ae4c525
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-ke-039-mae-l-s-going-bad/
Ke'mae L. S. Going Bad To My Family Especially My Mother For Encouraging Me Always. 1 Mr.Davis Publication Date: April 11th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-kemae39
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-megan-bretbrunner-bella-swan-with-them-or-against-them/
megan bretbrunner Bella Swan with them or against them part 1 chapter 1: Offer I'm sitting there on my bed with my laptop checking my e-mail. only just some junk mail abd ab e-mail from my mom telling me to skype her. let me introduse myself, I am Isabella Mary Swan, But people just call me Bella. I'm nineteen and i still hate my ex-boyfriends guts, i know it seems normal but it's not, not in the least. Him and his family are vampires. So yeah... we were dating for about 6 months every thing was perfect until my birthday that is... His family had thrown a big birthday for me, even though they knew i didn't like that sort of thing. Any way so yeah i got there and we ate cake, well i ate cake. then it was time to open presants. I grabbed the first one, and went to open it but i got a paper cut, Causing Jasper to flip out and try to atack me. Which caused Edward to "Accidently" throw me into the glass coffee table while trying to protect me from Jasper, Then he started screaming at Jasper then went to sulk in the corner about how much he hated himself. Then two weeks later just when i thought every things back to normal he breaks my heart by telling he doesn't love me, and that the whole family is moving, then to top it off he leaves me in the middle of the forest . So yeah i was pissed. A chat invite from my mom pops up. "Hello?" i asked. "Hey baby girl," she smiled. her hair had grown about 6 inches. "Hey mom," i smiled. "How are you?" she asked. "You know sitting reading, looking for jobs, and hating a bronze haired Jerk," i laughed. "Oh sweety you need to get over him," she told me. "I am i just hate him," i shrugged. "Any way on the subject of jobs, would you like a job up where i live?" she asked. "Depends on the job," I told her. "Well let's just say it's very high paying," She told me. "Mom just tell me," i told her. "fine... would you like a job as an FBI agent?" she asked. i burst out laughing, she looked shocked at my reaction. "Wait you're serious?" i asked suprised. "of course why would I lie?" she asked. "But i need a degree to get that job," i told her. "Nope, not if you know the right people... which you do," she giggled. "Whats that supposed to mean?" i asked. "Bella honey, Phil isn't a baseball player... he's the co-head of the FBI," she told me. "Oh my god," i said suprised. "Does that mean you are a FBI agent too?" i asked. i just couldn't picture my mom with a gun. "Yeah but i'm in the intellegence branch," she told me taking out her wallet and flipping it open, there sat a golden FBI badge. "Wow cool," i smiled. "I know right," she enthused. "so are you in or not?" she asked. "Oh hell yeah!" I laughed. "Bella!" She snapped. "sorry," i smirked, "agent swan." we burst out laughing. "Any way i'll pick you up next week," she told me. "K I'll tell charlie," i told her. "K, i'll set up a case for you, love you bye," she smiled. "Ok, love you," i said clicking off. chapter 2: telling charlie I walked downstairs. Dad was sitting in the chair watching foot ball. "Hey dad," i smiled. "Hey Bells," He said eating pop corn. "Hey dad you know Phil?" i asked. he set down his pop corn, "Yeah." "Hmm... how should i say this, he's the Head of the FBI," i told him. "What?" he asked suprised. "Yeah i know right," i joked, "Any way Renee offered me the job." "Are you going to take it?" he asked. I nodded. "But don't worry I'm picking the intellegence branch," I told him. "So, what's that got to do with any thing?" he asked. "It means I won't be fighting with any one... if all goes well," i told him. "What ever, I always knew you'd get to inforce the law in some way," he smiled proudly. "I love you dad," i said hugging him. "I love you too," He said hugging me... chapter 3: Mission the week passed quickly, i just told my friends i was going to move to gorgia. Mean while i purchased a bullet proof vest curtacy of my father. any way it's now time to go. i heard a knock on the front door. I rushed to the door, and opened it. My mom smiled at me. "Hey," i smiled. "Hey yourself," she laughed. "Any way want to come in?" i asked. "No sorry we got to get going," she told me. "Oh, ok i'll just grab my suit case and we can leave," i told her. "sounds good," she smiled. "Well any way i'll go get my stuff you call charlie," i told her. she nodded. i went upstairs and grabbed my large blue suit case ang headed back down stairs. "Ok let's go," i told her. "Ok," she smiled we walked outside. and outside was the awesomest car ever, i think it was a ferrari. "Wow sweet car," i enthused. "Thanks Phil bought it for me," she laughed. I simply gasped and got in the car. It had soft heated leather seats. "Wow I love it," i told her. "I know right," she laughed turning her seat heater on. "So how has phoenix been?" I asked. "Well the last time was there was about a month ago... but it's been good," she smiled. "Cool Forks is... well Forks," I sniggered. "Did you make any friends since you moved?" she asked me. "Yeah there's this nice girl named Angela," i told her. "That's nice," she said pulling out of the drive way. "So how have you been?" i asked. "Well I set up your case and I think you'll get a kick out of it," she giggled. "And what is it excactly?" i asked. "Well wait for it... you'll be investigating the cullens," she told me. "What the heck!" i said confused. I knew their secret, and I didn't know if I wanted the govenment in on it. "Well they are doing suspisious things, like taking out over 1,000,000 dollars at a time, as well as there have been records of them living in different places for over 60 years," she told me. "idiots," i muttered under my breath. "Ok I except," i told her. "Good," she smiled.font> chapter 4: HQ The Plane ride was boring and long, But i was happy to see my mom, we spent most of the plane ride talking. "I'm really sorry that happened," she told me. "It's OK, now you understand why i hate him," I chuckled. "Oh i do if i ever hear he hurt you more, I will blow his brains out," She huffed. "Mom, come on isn't that a little harsh?" i asked. I knew that wasn't possible to blow a vampires brains out. "No I don't he hurt my baby, and then left," she told me. "OK you got a point there," I sighed thinking about how true that sentence was. "I know i do," she laughed. "Attention passengers, we will be arriving in Washington D.C. in just under 20 minutes, please fasten you seat belts," the caption belted. "What ever!" i shouted back buckling my seat belt. "So what's D.C. like?" i asked. "It's nice it barley ever rains," she told me. "Oh," i mused, "That'll be a change." "I know," she laughed. "Hey," i laughed starting to notice the discomfort in my ears. I got out a piece of strawberry gum and started chewing it. it helped a little. So after the plane ride, we arrived at the airport. We got picked up by one of those black vans like in the movies. "Wow!" i exclaimed. "I know it's cool," she smiled. So me and my mom got in, and the seats were fabric for once, Only they felt like velvet. "So where are going?" i asked. "Head Quarters," She told me. "Is Phil there?" i asked. she nodded. "Has he changed at all?" I asked. "Well he dyed his hair his black but besides that nope," she told me. so about five minutes later we came up to a building. Mom motioned for me to get out so i did. We walked in. There was a man at the door, "I see you brought her." "Yeah," she nodded. "Right this way folks," he told us. we nodded, he led us to an office and told us to wait. At that moment Phil walked in, his hair was a little longer and was in fact black. "Dad!" i said giving him a bear hug. "Hey sweet pea!" He said smiling. "So what branch are you on?" My dad asked. "Investigation," i told him. he chuckled, "so how do you like your mission?" "I love it," i said hugging him. "Any way Hun' should we get her the equipment?" Mom asked. "Oh of course right this way Bella," he told me. "K," i smiled. they led me to what looked like a storage unit. Inside was everything from guns to Hidden camera's in the shape of pens. "Wow!" i gasped. "Cool i know," my Mom chuckled. "Any way you'll need one of these," he said holding up a gun, "other than that you only need spy equipment." "OK, I'll take the spy pen, the Clock microphone, and a blue tooth sound amplifier," i told him. "OK, I'll also need you to take these," he said handing me about 15 things. "k," i sighed putting them in my back pack. "OK, Hun' will you take her home now she needs rest," he asked. Mom nodded, "sure, come on Bella," she told me. i nodded and she brought me too a huge apartment and told me to choose my room, i choosed the smallest then went to bed. chapter 5: Alaska so i spent another week at HQ training. It was cool, I have learned some things on persuasion, and intimidation, as well as how to use the equipment. Then they put me on a plane to Alaska which was where the Cullen's were living currently. I arrived at the airport about ten o'clock. I paused putting my hair in a tight bun, so my scent didn't flow as much, yeah I did learn a thing or too from the Cullen's aka the blood suckers. I grabbed my back pack which only contained my money, my equipment, and a couple pairs of clothes, and bought a small apartment, and looked up the Cullen's address. It turns out they lives close to where I lived, So i thought I'd set up some basic spy Stuff. I walked the block to their house. their cars weren't there, so i walked over and knocked on the door. There was no response so I took out my sound amplifier and held the microphone part to the door and put the ear piece in my ear and listened. nothing, zero, zip. I turned the knob, it was locked so I took out a bobby pin and picked the lock. I Put on my blue tooth sound amplifier on and slowly walked in. It was huge, and bright. Surprisingly they had a clock just like the hidden security camera (with audio of course).It took about 5 minutes to set up the camera, then i switched one of their pens with the audio recording pen then left. now here comes the fun part, i deskize myself, so I walk five blocks to the hair place, and had my hair dyed red. And grabbed some blue contacts at the beauty store then went home and went to bed. The next day I put my hair up in pony tail to hide my scent, and put on a red halter-top with a black mini skirt, with a pair of stiletto's. If I dressed like myself they'd recognize me right away so yeah. Then I headed to the mall, to buy some more clothes like this. I scanned the store, my heart almost stopped there was Alice, shopping for shoes. I got out my tape recorder. I checked my watch. "day 1 11:20 A.M. target sighted," I said into the the thing and stopped recording. I grabbed my camera, and snapped a picture. Then i entered the store. I walked up to the clerk, "Hey I'm new at the whole fashion thing so what do you think I'd look hot in?" I asked her. "Well I think you'd look good in red and other bold colors come on I'll help you," she told me. she helped me for a few hours Then after the shopping trip I had encountered Alice, and bought a whole new wardrobe. Then I Went home and installed a phone call recorder on my phone. Then went to the coffee shop and scooped out high-schoolers. I found a friendly looking girl, that looked about 15. "Hello I'm From the FBI I'd like you to answer some questions," I told her showing my badge. "Of course miss..." she paused. "Swan." "What would you like to know?" she asked. "do you know any thing about the Cullen's?" I asked. "Yeah a little," she told me. "Would you tell me a little bit about them?" i asked. "Sure," And continued to tell their cover story. "Their a family that moved here last year their names are Carlisle, Esme, Edward, Rosalie, Emmett, Alice, and Jasper," she told me. then she told me their whole cover story. "Miss? have you noticed any thing out of the ordinary about the Cullen Family?" i asked taking out my notebook. "Well their pale does that count?" she asked. I wrote down what she said. "yeah thank you for your for your time miss and don't repeat our interview," I told her. she nodded "OK." threw the day I interviewed people, and the only person that was partly right was one that said their eyes change color. Chapter 6: Water in the bucket It had been two days and I decided it was time to check the foot age. So I opened my laptop and cracked into the camera's out put. I checked the current recording. I clicked so it was playing what was happening right now. Carlisle was in the living room with Rosalie, Emmett, and Alice. "How was your day at school?" Carlisle asked. "It was fine, you would've seen when I made Jasper use his power to make everyone cry, then made them make out with each other," Emmett said laughing. "You idiot," Rosalie said whacking him on the head causing a thundering sound. "Guys you should be more careful, we don't want to draw attention to our selves," Carlisle scolded. "Now if you excuse me i'm going hunting," he told them walking out of the room. Yep I was saving this on my computer for evidence. "OK we're going to the book store," they said in a normal tone knowing Carlisle could here them So I saved it to my evidence folder then got off to go to the book store. There I searched the store with my eyes as usual. Rosalie was checking out a magazine with Alice. People to be exact. I took out a note pad then grabbed my blue tooth and put it in. "Do you think we should buy this?" Alice asked. "Well It's OK...eh what the heck we have more money then we know what to do with so sure," Rosalie sighed. I wrote down their dialog in my note-pad, Got my book then left. I got home about five minutes later and changed into a pair of sweats. i grabbed my phone and called my mom. "Hey sweetie hows it going?" she asked. "Yeah they'res defiantly something up," I told her. "Wow you think so all ready?" she asked. "totally They're weird like I put a hidden camera in their house and Emmett did something stupid and Carlisle said and i quote "Guys you should be more careful, we don't want to draw attention to our selves" isn't that a little weird?" I asked. "Hmm... that is interesting," She sighed. "Then Carlisle said something about hunting." "Hmm, strange," she sighed. "I'll keep a closer eye on them mom," i told her. "OK love you, bye," she told me hanging up. I knew what they were but how to prove it? that was what I didn't know. Chapter 7: Sun shine I woke up on a sunny Friday, that's right it was a sunny day. I slipped out of bed and had a shower, then changed into a short black dress with a pair of pumps. At that moment my phone rang. "Hello?" I asked. "Open the door," Someone whispered. I hung up. My phone rang again. "Open the door," They said a little louder. "I ain't going to open the door! who is this?" I asked hanging up. My phone rang again. I picked it up. "It's Carlisle," He whispered then hung up. So i put my gun in my boot just in case then opened the door. Carlisle was standing there smiling and sparkling (Literally). "Uh... hi," I stuttered. Oh crap they weren't supposed to know I was here. "Bella!" He said hugging me. OK now i just felt bad. "Hey Carlisle," I smiled,"Would you like to come in?" "Sure," he smiled. "So how have your family been?" I asked. "There OK but their a little sad they had to leave you," He told me. "Wait what? Edward said you guys wanted to move," I told him. "Well that's a lie we miss you," He told me. "Thanks but I don't know," I sighed. I knew it would brake his heart when he found out i was trying to expose them, hmm... maybe I'll leave him out. "So how are you doing?" He asked. "Oh I'm an FBI agent now," I told him "But you're only nineteen," He said surprised. "Well my father is a big part of it so he got me a job there," I told him. "So what's your mission?" he asked. "Well I'm not supposed to say," I sighed guilty. "Oh, OK," He smiled. "But how are you doing?" i asked turning on my blue tooth recorder. "Oh good, pretty much the same," He told me. "Oh, well that's nice," I smiled. "Any way I gotta go," He smiled. I Almost cried. "K, by the way would you not mention me too the family?" I asked. "Sure but why?" He asked. "Cause of the FBI thing," I told him semi-truthfully. "Oh, OK," He smiled. "Will you call me?" I asked trying to settle my guilt. "Sure, any way I got to go," He told me. "Ok later," I smiled. "Later," He said walking out the door. "Bye," I whispered knowing he could hear me. I decided to check the out put from the Camera for evident's that i knew I'd find since it was sunny. I Grabbed my laptop and opened the connection. Rosalie, Emmett, and Jasper were sitting on the couch, windows open, so they were sparkling like diamonds. So I saved it to my evidence folder. Then E-mailed my mom. Rosalie's point of view I Felt like we were being watched, but there was no scent, and no heart beat. "Emmett, do you feel like someones watching you or is it just me?" i asked. "Probably just you," Jasper snickered. Emmett smacked him like I usually did. I burst out laughing. "Ooohhh, would you like some ice for that burn," I laughed. "Yes please," Emmett said playfully. "Back to the original topic, I feel like I'm being watched don't you?" I asked. "Maybe a little bit," Emmett shrugged, "But I'm used to it." "Dude you idiot we're in the sun right now," I told him. "Well then close the blinds," Jasper pointed out. "What ever," I said closing the blinds then sitting back down at vampire speed. "But seriously if someone decided, to stalk us would Alice be able to see?" Emmett asked. "Yeah but still I just have this weird feeling," I sighed. "It'll be ok babe," he said rubbing my hand. "I know that, it's just weird, I can't put my finger on it," I sighed. "It's probably nothing," Emmett told me. chapter 8: Alice's vision Alice's point of view I was sitting with jasper watching TV when suddenly I was over come by a vision. We were being thrown into a jail cell. "Please we didn't do anything!" Carlisle pleaded. "just Shut it bear boy," The cop yelled. "Hey there's nothing wrong with bears," Emmett defended. Then Rosalie burst into dry sobs. "Hey Rosie, It'll be alright," Emmett said hugging her. "I told you we were being watched!" She screamed at him. Oh my god are the volturi going to catch us? Is Emmett going to get us thrown in jail again? If he does i swear i'll pop his head like a grape. Bella's point of view "So Yeah, I was walking and i just tripped over my own feet at graduation it was so embarrassing," I told Carlisle over the phone "Oh I'm sorry, any way I got to go," He told me. "OK," I smiled and hung up. I felt really bad about busting Carlisle and his family but hopefully he'll forgive me. I Smile and sat down. I noticed a single blonde hair on my black chair (I Know Their hair doesn't just fall out but bear with me) I recognized it as Carlisle's. I grabbed a test tube and but it in their and labeled it Carlisle, And put it in my mail box and mailed it to HQ. Chapter 9: Not human It had been about six days after I sent the sample I finally got a reply it said: Dear Agent swan, It's like nothing we've ever seen before, His DNA is way different from Normal people, We fear that he's not human, Please tell us what ever you know Love, Phil. I grabbed at pen and wrote. Dear Dad, Yes I know what they are but you wouldn't believe me, I know things that normal People shouldn't but I can tell you this they are in fact not human Love, Bella. So after i finished writing it I put it in an envelope and sent it to him. Alice's point of view the visions have been becoming more clear, But I still didn't know who was trying to capture us, and why. And Carlisle doesn't know either. We've ruled out the volturi because we didn't do anything wrong that and their Carlisle's friend. so we really didn't know. Bella's point of view He had replied two days later dear Bella, Any thing is possible at this point, We found out the man had 25 chromosomes, something un-heard of.Please help us, Love, your dad I sighed and wrote back Dear Dad, You won't believe this but they are vampires, But real vampires are quite different from holly wood vampires. First Garlic doesn't hurt them they can't eat at all, They don't burn in the sun they sparkle, Their eyes change colors when their "thirsty", But not all vampires feed on human blood some feed on animals like the Cullen's that's why their eyes are not red, and crosses do not hurt them, because Carlisle is a christian so yeah, Pleas don't hurt them to bad Love, Bella I wrote the letter and put all the evidence on a flash drive then put the flash drive in the envelope and sealed it and sent it. Alice's point of view The Visions were so clear it hurt I didn't know what to do. Carlisle had no clue either, we ruled out the volturi because we did nothing wrong, as well as they are Carlisle's friends. chapter 10: The secrets out It's been two days since I sent the letter and I have been biting my nails non stop, Just hoping to get a reply.Finally I decided to check my mail. Thankfully it was in there. I took it out of the envelope and read it; it said: Dear Bella, I don't think you're crazy, Some of the stuff you say makes since Like the sparkling, And the money, But tell me why would you want me too go easy on them? I mean they are vampires, They don't have souls right? reply ASAP, Phil I was fuming by the time the letter ended, I replied: Dear Phil, How dare you! they are my second family, and they have the most beautiful souls I have ever come across, They hunt animals because they think hurting people is morally wrong! I mean think about it Carlisle is a doctor because he wants to help people not hurt them, seriously dad that was a low blow! from a person who's really mad at you, Bella. Alice's point of view I was really worried now, if my visions are correct it will be in about three days from now, the whole family is now panicking. Carlisle figured out which vampire would want to hurt us, and that's Victoria the mate of James. So we set out and killed her, but the visions didn't go away. Every one was on edge now. Phil's point of view Maybe that was a low blow, I mean she was in love with Edward Cullen, And they do only drink animal blood but still are they safe? That's what i didn't know. I would just have to trust Bella on this. I Started up the privet Jet and got on. The plane ride as stupid and long. When I finally got off, It was two in the morning. I drove to Bella's apartment, and knocked on her door. After a few seconds she opened it I noticed she had her gun in her boot, 'just like her mom' i thought to myself. "Hey," I smiled. "You better not hurt my family!" She exclaimed. "OK, I get what you are saying but I need to take them back to HQ, any idea's?" i asked. "They are stronger than humans by a long shot so maybe a diamond cage, but that's only if they don't co-opperate which they will" She mused. "Good to know," I said hugging her. "now I'll be back I better do my job, I promise I won't be mean," I said hugging her. "K later," She sighed walking back into her apartment. Carlisle's point of view I was reading the newspaper when someone knocked on our door. I Walked over human pace and opened it. A tall strong looking guy in a black suit was standing there. "How may I help you?" i asked politely. The man flipped his wallet open inside was a FBI badge, "We know what you are." "Uh I don't know what you're talking about," I said nervously. "Don't worry we will not hurt you, we just want to talk to you," He told me. "And how do I know you won't hurt me?" I asked. "My daughter forbid it," He told me. "Fine, GUYS!" I called. they rushed down vampire speed, "What?" "Oh my gosh!" The man gasped. "Attention my family, this man has found out our secret and wants us to come with him," I told them. "What!" They all screamed at the same time. The man winced. "Sorry..." "Phil," He told me. The family and I gasped. "Oh Bella told you about me?" He smiled. "What do you want with us?" Asked a frightened Esme. "We just want you to come with us to D.C.," He Told her. "OK let's go," I told him. "But dad!" Emmett boomed. "Emmett please shut up now is not the time," I told him. "Fine," He sighed running over to us, vampire speed must i add. "OMG!" Said the guy surprised. "Emmett really, you had to do that?" I smirked. "Yeah, yeah I did," He laughed. "I'm sorry about my son he's being a buffoon," I sighed. "But my daughter told me vampire's couldn't have children," He told me. "Well we changed them but we think of each-other as family," I told him. "Oh Bella said something about that," He smiled. "So are we leaving or are we going to talk til two in the morning?" Jasper sighed. "My son is right let's go," I told him. "OK," He smiled. "Lead the way," I smiled. He smiled and motioned for us to follow him, so we did. he lead us to a black van with darkly tinted windows like in the movies. So we got in. and he drove us to the airport, I expected him to get tickets but he asked the secratary, "Will you fire up the jet?" So that's when I knew he had a privet jet. "Oh you have a privet jet too?" Emmett asked stupidly. "Oh you have a jet of your own?" he asked me. "Yeah we do have 3 hundred years worth of money," I told him. His jaw dropped. "That's how old you are?" he asked. "I was changed in 1665, when I was twenty-three," I told him. he just stared amazed. so after about ten minutes we got on the plane. It was fairly large although smaller than ours. "So how do you like it?" he asked me. "It's very nice," I smiled politely. "So where's the x-box?" Emmett and Jasper asked at the same time. he laughed, "Sorry I don't have an x-box on the plane." They groaned. chapter 11: interagation Esme's point of view We arrived at a place at like 11 o'clock, It was huge and bland. He led us in, the people had black suits and guns, not the type of people to annoy. He told us to follow a man with a cold expression. so we did. He leads us to this weird small room with a table and eight chairs with a mirror on one side. I knew what it was it was the interrogation room. "Uh, what is the meaning of this?" I asked. "Oh this is the interrogation room," He told me. "I know that but why are we in here we did nothing wrong?" I asked. did the dude think I was an Idiot I was from the 1920's I knew what this room was. "Nothing we just want to know more about you," He told us. "But why are we going to this room if we are not being interrogated?" I asked. "Just... stay," He told us. that's freaky," Uh... OK." "The investigator will be in here in a moment," He told me in a cold voice. "Why are you treating us as if we did something wrong?" I asked irritably. "Honey calm down," Carlisle said grabbing my hand. "I'm sorry ma'am everyone or your case every 'thing' is interrogated after arrival if suspected," He told me coldly. I hated how he called us things, and to top it off he spit out the word like it was venom on his tongue. "How dare you!" Alice said hotly. "Alice!" Carlisle said in a sharp tone. "Sorry dad," She sighed. just then a friendly looking man walked in, he was tall and he had brow hair, and blue eyes. "Harry are you being unpleasant to our guests?" the man asked. "I hardly call them guests," He spat at us. "Harry just go!" said the man sharply. and so he did. "Hello I'm sorry about him he hates fantasy," He sighed. "We aren't fantasy we are just Descreite," I told him. "Any way what are your names," He asked. "I'm Jasper and this is my wife Alice," He said introducing them. "I'm Emmett and this is my babe Rosalie," He smiled at her. And she smacked him. "and this is my wife Esme, and I'm Carlisle, We are the leaders of the coven," He said and shook the mans hand. "Oh and that's Edward their," Emmett smirked. "Hey I'm not stupid!" Edward shot at Emmett. "Uh I don't get it Emmett never said anything," The man said confused. "Oh Edward can read minds," Carlisle told him. "Wow, what other powers do you have?" He asked amazed. Emmett laughed. "Well Alice can see the future, Edward can read minds, and Jasper can read and change emotions," We all said together. "Wow," He smiled falsely. So what do ya want to know?" Emmett asked bluntly. "Do you actually drink human blood?" He asked. "No actually me and my family restrain from human blood for it's wrong," Carlisle said politely. "Then what do you drink?" He asked. "Animals," Jasper told him. "Can you really stake a vampire?" He asked. "Sure but the vampire would just laugh when it shattered into pieces," Emmett said laughing. "So vampire's have super strength?" He asked. We nodded. "As well as enhanced scence's, and super speed," Carlisle smiled. " Then I'm guessing crosses don't hurt you," He smiled. "I am religious," Carlisle reminded him. "And I'm guessing coffins are you out," The man sighed. "We don't sleep at all but that would be awesome!" Emmett exclaimed. "He's the joker isn't he?" The man asked. We all nodded. "So can I see your speed?" He asked. We nodded, and Emmett ran up to him vampire speed. The man was baffled (I love that word). "I got you," Emmett smiled. We burst out laughing. The man just shook his head. "By the way we never got your name," Carlisle said politely. "Oh. It's agent brown," He told us. Text: I own only the story All rights reserved. Publication Date: November 2nd 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-mermaidstailgirl
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-ravon-carter-where-were-you/
Ravon Carter Where were you? Subtitle I dedicate this to myself .. if that's possible. It reminds me of my situation where I was sexually abused and It haunts me forever. I just want you all to know Amanda's story. Why me? My name is Amanda , I am 9 years old. I live with my Daddy. My Mommy died when I was 7. I cant say I miss her because I rarely even saw her even when she was alive but I did love her. My Daddy is a doctor so I barely saw much of him either. When my Mommy died he started working harder and later than he had before. I miss him alot. Since I cant stay home along he puts me in classes such as ballet and piano but I prefer skateboarding and going to the park. My Daddy says those things are innopropriate for a girl my age so when I dont have my classes he has his best friend Nate babysit me. Him babysitting me changed my life. Definately not in a good way. ''Daddy isn't coming home today?" I wait for Nate to answer. "yea , he has to work today" he replies. I frown. "what do you want to do today?" he asks me. I turn around and I stick my hand in my toy box and I pull out my favorite barbie "you want to play with my trucks?" I ask. He smiles nice and big "sure" I walk upstairs into my room for the bits and pieces to my truck set. "How about we do something else fun?" he suggests. I turn around quickly. "I didnt know you were behind me". He grins. "How about I show you this little fun game I know". I was a child and I hadnt realized what "fun" was. "Thats okay I want to play with my trucks" I say. "Well you actually dont have a choice!" he snaps. I look up at him clueless. Suddenly he puts his hand up my skirt. I scream. He quickly puts his hand over my mouth. "Shut it or i'll kill you" he whispers in my ear. My eyes widen. He yanks up my skirt. "This will only hurt a little" I'm sixteen now. Nate still comes over and hurts me but now that i'm older I fight him with all i've got. I turn around so that I could look at myself in the mirror. I have long curly brown hair and bright blue eyes. Suddenly theres a knock at my door. I go stiff at the thought of it being Nate. "whos there?" I ask. My door opens "I was coming to tell you im going to work" Dad says. "oh..." "seetheart you sound so disappionted" silence. ''Nate is going to be dropping by to check on you later" He announces. "Theres no need for him to come and check on me. Dont let him back here hes crazy , He hurts me-" he cuts me off "why are you talking such nonesense he would never lay a finging on you. He is like a brother to me." "Cant you just listen , please just hear me out" I plead. He glares at me "I wont have you lying on Nate , i'm going to work" he turns and walks away. I sit on my bed. "Why wont he listen to me?" My eyes start to burn. "Daddy dont you love me?" I lay down and I pull my blue quilt my father had given me for my last birthday over me. I cry myself to sleep. New...Everything I wake up to the sound of movement. "Dad..Nate.." I call out , hating myself for saying his name. Then theres no movement and I dont hear anything. I sigh and I sit up. Suddenly I feel sick. I run over to my bathroom and I throw up. I sit next to the toilet considering my situation. "It cant be .. I cant be pregnant" I let out a deep breathe and then I get up. Quickly I dig through all my drawers looking for money and any loose change , once I gather up as much money as I can I throw on some shoes and I walk down the stairs. Then I hear something rustle near the couch. "Whos there?" nothing replies. I continue walking and just as I was about to turn the knob something grabs me , I scream. "Chill out Amanda" I flip the light switch on and I turn around "Duncan!" I scream. My older brother who is now in college stands behind me. Hes 26  already in his last year. We share both the Curly brown hair and blue eye trait. So we pretty much look alike. I jump into his arms , we nearly toppled over. "I missed you so much" I say. Tears start to well in my eyes. "Hey dont cry , I missed you too" He wipes away my tears with his thumb. "What are you doing back here?" I ask curious. "I mostly just came to see you guys.." I cross my arms over my chest "I know theres more" He sighs and plops down on the couch. "I'm meeting my girlfriends parents" I playfully punch him in the arm "are you reallly that nervous?" I ask. He nods. Everytime he gets nervous he breaks into uncontrollable laughter. I smile "well cant help you there" He smiles "I've been wanting to hear you say that" I let out a long dramatic sigh "I cant wait until you can really come back" "yea i've been missing this place" "i've been wanting to get out of here" I gesture at the house. "I guess if I were you i'd be ready to split aswell" Then I remember what im supposed to be doing "Duncan I need to go to the convienant store down the street i'll be right back" I turn. "Nonesense i'll take you" he jumps up off the couch. "Theres really no need for you to" I stutter at the thought of him finding out. "Come on , I have a car" I sigh "fine" We pull up to the convienant store "theres no need for you to come in , i'll be right out" I say. Hoping he would just give in "alright. I'm staying at a hotel tonight so im going to just drop you off and leave ok?" "ok but dont disappear without saying goodbye again" He nods. I rush into the store and I look around for the pregnancy tests , not wanting to ask because i'd feel embarrassed. Finally after what seemed like forever I find them. I grab the cheapest one and a bag of patatoe chips. I bring it to the cash register. The lady rings it up "7.95" I hand her 7 crumpled bills and 4 quarters "keep the change" I say. She hands me the bag and I leave. "What'd you get?" Duncan asks "Patatoe chips" He laughs a little. "well then lets go" I say. Once back at the house I say bye to Duncan and I give him a big hug "Tell Dad I said Hello and i'll be back tomorrow" "ok bye" I close and lock the door. I rush upstairs into my bathroom. I read the instructions on the little package. I pee on the little stick. It says wait 3 minutes for the results but I decide to wait 10. When its time I flip it over. A big pink plus sign stares back at me. ''Noo.." I cry. I throw the test across the room. "Why me?" I break down crying. I have to tell Dad I tell myself. Wait I cant..I have to. I hear the door downstairs open and close. "Amanda i'm home" I slowly walk downstairs. "How was work today?" I ask him. "same as usual" He replies. "Duncan came back to visit and he said he'll be back tomorrow" His face brightens a little. "I cant wait to see him" He turns to go to his room. "dad?" He turns and looks at me "what is it?" I stutter "I..I..have..have..something to..tell you" I look down at my feet. "Well go on" Silence. "I..i'm..pregnant" I say quietly. "Speak up I didnt hear you right" He says. "I'm Pregnant" I say without stuttering. He stares at me shocked and then it turns to anger "Who is the father?" He demands. I dont say anything. "Who is the father?!" He shouts. "If I told you , you wouldnt believe me" I say. "Pack your things your going to your aunts house" I stand there. " I didnt stutter , now hurry up!" he yells. My eyes just start pushing out tears. I have lost myself again "Get in the car" Dad says. "I'm leaving today , cant I stay until the end of the week?" I ask. He shakes his head. I throw my suitcase in the trunk and I sit down. He starts the engine and pulls out. I look at my phone to check my page on my favorite social networking cite. I scroll down. One read "I heard shes pregnant and gave some boy STDS and shes switching schools" I read it over and over to be clear of what it says. I scroll down more "She had sex with like 10 boys I wonder if she gets paid" I scroll down again. I slam my phone down. "How did this even get out , i've i've only been absent for a few days" My Dad pays no attention to me. Tears roll down my cheek. What is happening to me? I pick up my phone again "I feel sick , Dad have you seen what they've been writing?" I ask. "Does it even matter?" he says. "yes it does!" I yell. "Then delete your account" "No way" I reply. I cut my phone off and I sleep .. or try to. "We're almost there" my Dad shakes me awake. I sit up. "Dad do you really have to send me away?" Silence. "Dad?" He still says nothing. I sigh and I look out the window. Finally he pulls up to a White house. "I hope you remember her name" he says. "Of course.How could I forget" I say. "Get out" he says. "Can I say goodbye first god" I say. I step out the door and I grab my phone. I go around and I grab my suitcase. "Dad when am I coming back?" I ask him. He looks at me then puts the car in reverse , backs up and speeds off. "Never" I say to myself. My Aunt Susan comes outside "Where is your Dad?" she asks while picking up my suitcase. "He was kinda in a hurry" I reply. "He didnt even say bye" Susan says. I sigh. Noah runs outside."Hi Amanda" He says. "Hi Noah , you've sure gotten big how old are you now?" "Im 10 , almost 11" "Well its nice to see you again" I walk inside the house "your room is upstairs third door on the right" Susan explains. I nod and I take my suitcase from her and I walk upstairs to my new room. I keep the light switch off and I lock the door , I sit down at the desk in the corner of the room and I open the laptop. "I need to see what people are writing" I tell myself. Then I think back to my Dads words "Delete it" I shake my head "No way" I log on. I scroll down and I begin reading. "Its worse than before" I stare at the screen. I slam the computer screen closed and I lay my head down on it . I close my eyes letting the tears flow , I just decide to let them all out this time. Someone knocks on the door "Amanda?" Susan knocks again. "Leave me alone" I say. "You've been in there all day , you need to eat" she replies. I just ignore her. "Honey please" she begs. I dont say anything. "Amanda" I keep my head down and I just sit there. After what seemed like hours Susan came back. "I'm calling Duncan ok?" I stare out my window. "First the pregnancy now this , is this what everyone wanted me to do?" I ask myself. "He'll be here in a little bit" I listen to her walk away. I slowly open the computer , my hands shaking. I just stare at the screen. For 3 hours I just sit here. Finally I get up. I walk over to the bathroom and I grab some pills from the cabinet , I try to open it. "Where is she?" I hear Duncans voice down the hall. He knocks on my door. "Amanda" I continue to try to open the cap. "I have a spare key to her room" Susan says , I hear the key jingling in the lock. "Duncan call 911 just incase somethings happened to her. I hear him dial and him begin to speak to the operator , I frantically try to open the cap. Susan rushes in "I cant get the cap off!" she tries to grab the pills away from me and we struggle. The top breaks open and the pills spill out. "What did you do!" "Amanda calm down" she says. She grabs me and pulls me into her arms. Suddenly my knees start to buckle and then everythings dark. Recovery I open my eyes and I sit up , looking at my surroundings. "Where am I?" a man standing next to the bed im in writes something down on a piece of paper "a hospital but your actually free to go" he replies "how long was I here?" "about 3 days" he explains. I sigh and I run my hands through my hair. "Wheres Duncan?" I ask. He scribbles something else down on the paper "i'll go get him for you" I nod. He disappears down the hall and I throw my covers off me and I stand up. "Hey , ready to go home?" Duncan says. "Which home do you mean exactly?" I say angrily. He sighs "Dont be like that..but why exactly did Dad send you there?" He asks. I look up surprised "you mean you don't know?" He nods. Silence. "So are you going to tell me?" I look down at my feet , I look back up "Maybe later" He smiles "I guess we should get going then and Amanda , dont ever do that again" "Dont worry I wont" I say. "Pinkie promise" He hold out his pinkie. I giggle and I cross mine over his "prinkie promise" "Amanda im so glad your home" Susan says. I give her a little smile "im sorry for burdening you" I say. "Oh dont worry about that I just want you to be safe..I guess I can understand you a bit since I was in a situation that was a bit like yours" I nod. Duncan looks at his watch "I have to go but your going to tell me whats going on right?" he says. "Right" He leans over and kisses my forehead and then gives Susan a hug. "See you later Susan" He opens and closes the door , disappearing just like that. I sigh. "Amanda your not sick anymore?" Noah asks. "nope im all better now" "Yayy , so do want to play football with me and Johnny?" He stares up at me with his light brown eyes. "Who is Johnny?" I ask. "Oh hes my babysitter although I dont really need one but hes pretty cool" "Am I really that cool?"  a teenage boy about my age pops up out of nowhere. He has wavy blonde hair and nice grey eyes. Hes hot for a babysitter I think to myself. "Yea your pretty awesome" Noah replies. The boy walks up to me and sticks out his hand "Johnny Mcleaver" I put my hand in his "Amanda Maturana Mccauley" we shake hands. My stomach flutters inside. Noah interrupts "so are you going to play or not?" "Thats alright I think im going to go and get used to my room" I say. "Haven't you gotten used to it enough?" He asks. I turn to him and I glare at him making him wither about 2 feet smaller "Apparently not enough" I turn and walk upstairs , hating myself for embarrassing myself. "Tomorrow then?" Noah calls out. "Maybe" I yell back. I go into my room I close the door and I flop down onto my bed. "I guess this isn't so bad" What do I do? I'm in the kitchen making a snack and suddenly the door bell rings. I open it. "oh hi Johnny" I say. 'I was wondering if you wanted to hang with me and my friends?" He replies. "No thanks" "Ok then let me introduce them.This is Abigail , Humphrey , Alex , Diego , Chloe , and my girlfriend Olivia" He explains. Right a girlfriend .. duhh. "Nice to meet you guys" I say. They all nod. No words no nothing. "Bye" I say and I close the door in his face. "Gosh Amanda way to be friendly" Susan says. "I'm just not very good with people" Susan pats my back "I understand" A few days later Johnny and his mother decides to come over and have lunch with us. Afterwards I played games with Noah and Johnny. We actually had alot of fun together. I happened to learn alot about Johnny and Noah. They learned alot about me , I guess I could say we had a good time. Days later...I couldn't even fit my clothes. ''Oh no!'' I look at myself in a mirror. I'm showing way more than I used to. ''Dont worry" Susan says. "Dont worry!" I yell in frustration. "You can have my old maternity clothes?"She suggests. I sit down in my chair. "I guess thats my only option" Susan pats my hand "I'm not telling you not to worry but I want you to try not to worry so much" She turns and begins walking away "I'll be back with those clothes" she disappears. Suddenly something hits my window. I walk over "Sorry!'' Noah yells. He picks up the football. ''Come join us?" Johnny asks. I shrugg "why the heck not" I turn around "Susan!" "I'm coming" she shouts from her room. I look out the window once more "I'll be down in a sec" Susan taps my shoulder. I look at the large bundle of clothes in her armsl "Thanks" I take them and I spread them out on my bed , searching for the right outfit. ''I'm going out so i'll be back in a little bit"Susan says. "Alright" she leaves. I pick out a t-shirt dress , leggins , and cute ankle boots with a low heel (Thank god) I quickly put my hair in a loose braid , I throw in a bow and I'm off. "You took forever" Noah complains. I stick out my tongue ''Theres no rush" Noah sticks his tongue out. Johnny laughs "You two have a great realationship" I blush a little. "Amanda catch!" Noah throws the football. I run , struggling to catch it but it finally makes its way into my hands. "She caught it" Johnny says like its unbelievable. "Of course I did" I say. "You better not be bragging" Noah says. "I'm not" I wink at Johnny and he laughs. After playing catch and three flags up for what seemed like forever. Noah declared tahst we were going to have a race. "Right now?At this ver momment?" I ask. "Yea , all the way to the park" Johnny says. I glare at him "So your in on this too" He grins. ithink of something to say "Thats..a little far" I stutter. "Its two blocks you wuss" Noah says. "Yea 2 really long blocks" I wine. "Sore loser!" Noah begins to chant. "Fine! I'm going to beat you" I say. "your not going to beat me" Johnny exclaims. "Watch me" I reply. Noah then draws a starting line with his chalk stick. "Ready.Set.Go!" Noah yells. We run. I can do this I tell myself , afterall I was on a track team. Johnny is ahead of me and Noah is in the back. Who is he calling a sore loser. I start running faster. Next thing I know i'm right next to johnny. The park is not too far up ahead. ''I Guess I wont be going to easy on you" I say to Johnny. He chuckles. I speed pass him and I run. I make it to the park. My brown curls spilling out of its braid and down my back. Johnny stares and I grin. "I won!" "Good job" Johnny gives me a high five. "Good..job" Noah says between breathes. ''You both did good but I did better" I brag. They laugh. We turn and begin walking back. "Amanda?" Noah says. "What?" "You know I was going easy on you right?" "right".Silence. We all burst out laughing. Do I tell them? "How was your day?" Susan asks. I look at Johnny and Noah on the couch eating popcorn and watching a Spiderman movie. "It was great" she smiles "well thats nice to hear" I shrugg."Amanda refill the popcorn bowl" Noah hands me the bowl. I quickly refill it and I hand it back. Noah grabs a handful and stuffs it into his mouth "thanks!" He sits back down. "What'd I miss?" Noah asks Johnny. I turn back to Susan "I was thinking maybe we could all watch Juno?" "I'll think about it" she replies. "I thought maybe they could kinda open up to the idea .. you know" Susan wipes her hands off on her apron. "You'll have to tell them either way honey" I sigh "I guess your right" she pats my hand. "Go Spiderman!" Noah yells from across the room. "I'm going to bed" I turn to walk up the stairs. "Suit yourself" Susan mutters. I sigh as I lay down on my bed. My phone suddenly rings, without checking to see who it is I answer it. "Hello?.." silence. I hear breathing on the other end of the line. "Sweetheart its me" "Daddy?" he sighs. "I've been wanting to hear your voice" he says softly. But then suddenly im angry "Oh wait so after you kick me out abd abandon me you want to say you miss me?!" I sanp."Amanda dont speak to me in such tone" he says sternly."I'm sorry but I have better things to do in my life than talk to a crappy piece of nothing of a dad!" I hang up."I hate his guts" I throw my phone against the wall and I watch it shatter."Amanda?" I turn around, tears in my eyes."Oh..Johnny..whats up?" I wipe my tears away with my hand."I heard you yelling at someone so I came to check on you" My shoulder hunches over "My dad called" My eyes start to burn."I'm not really good at cheering people up but...is your Dad even worth your tears?" "Maybe..maybe not" I reply. I wipe my tears but they just keep flowing like a river, no matter how many times I try to stop its flow. Next thing I know, im in Johnny's arms like a baby. His hands and arms are warm around me."I dont think he is" He strokes my hair. I start to fall asleep and my crying stops. I think for a moment about telling him but someone interrupts "Johnny.." I look up. "Hey Olivia." I ease my way out of his arms.''Noah said you came to check on her but it looks like your doing more than checking on her" Johnny lets out a small laugh. "She was feeling down .. but way to say hello" He stands up and kisses her lips."My mom is outside so lets go" Olivia says. Johnny looks at me."Bye Amanda, remember hes not worth your tears. They're to precious to waste" He turns and walks away. Olivia turns to me "Keep your ugly little face and your scrawny little arms away from my boyfriend or else I'll start digging your grave" She flips her hair over her shoulder, pops her gum and walks away. "She'd better be careful who she threatens , Karma is a bitch after all" I turn off my light and I snuggle under my blanket and I sigh."I cant tell him..I just cant." I tell myself before I close my eyes and I fall asleep. Publication Date: January 16th 2014 https://www.bookrix.com/-laadf4a707d7c25
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-bravestar-leader-of-leafclan-spottedpaw-039-s-death/
Bravestar, leader of LeafClan Spottedpaw's Death Bravestar's Dream of her Daughter's Death "Mama!" A distressed young orange-and-white she-cat wailed forlornly from the banks of an overflowing, violently rushing river. She was looking straight at Bravestar, her brilliant blue eyes pleading for mercy. That azure gaze pierced Bravestar’s heart with anguish and regret like a million tiny shards of ice. "Hold on, Spottedpaw, I’m coming!" The petrified ginger leader picked her way down a tall mound of rocks carefully. I’m not going to make it in time, thought Bravestar frantically. Spottedpaw twisted her head around and gasped. Another, more muscular orange-and-white cat, a tom, was stalking towards her, the glow of murder glinting in his green-and-amber eyes. She looked back to the river, then to the powerful tom, then back to Bravestar. Spottedpaw bunched her muscles to jump into the swollen river and swim for her life, but the tom was faster. As she bounded into the water, he unsheathed his lethal claws and sliced her belly. Spottedpaw yelped like a hundred frightened birds, then splashed into the water. "Adderstar!" Bravestar shrieked. "You foxhearted murderer!" She leapt off the rocks and landed with a hard thud. Her legs felt numb from the fall, but she didn’t care. Out of the corner of her eye, Bravestar could see a sinister gray tabby she-cat watching from the shadows of the trees, her olive green eyes shimmering with pride for her new mate. Snakeheart. That mousebrained fool. Bravestar shook her head. There were more urgent matters at paw! She crept towards Adderstar and sprang on his back. He tried to shake her off, but she held on firmly. She lowered her muzzle to the back of his neck, teeth bared, ready to deliver the fatal bite. But before she could, another squeal came from her wounded daughter. She looked back and saw that the petite apprentice had washed up on the shore many foxlengths downstream, lying in a pool of cerise-tinged water. Bravestar jumped off of Adderstar and rushed to her daughter. By the time she arrived, the little she-cat was already cold and lifeless, and all of her blood had washed away. Just how I found her, reflected Bravestar sadly. A familiar scent engulfed her, and she turned to see a starry she-cat. "Spottedpaw!" she cried, overjoyed to see her daughter again. The dazzling spirit laid her tail across her mother’s muzzle to quiet the mourning she-cat. "Shhh, it’s okay. I’m content in StarClan, although I miss all of you at home in LeafClan." Her voice started to crack with sadness. "Send my love to Creektail and Papa. Tell them both that I love them and miss them very much. And please tell Leaf-fire that it wasn‘t his fault I died." Spottedpaw faded until she was barely visible against the clear blue sky. Bravestar wept. "No, don’t leave me again!" "I won’t, Mama. I promise . I’ll always be in your heart, as long as you remember me." Publication Date: March 13th 2010 https://www.bookrix.com/-bravefire
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-ne-ne-high-school-chronicles/
Ne - Ne High School Chronicles High School Chronicles Welcome to High School Chronicles where all things of possibilites can happen. Beware children under 14 not prohibited. As a new year arrives everybody reunited . This school year brings drama , violence , wars , gangs , drugs , sex , and money. At Crayton Mitchell High it never fails to bring the worst out. It's going to be raw and uncut , let the fun and police sirens begin. Give Me Good Ratings ! ! Chapter 1 : Welcome Back Inside of Crayton , there were rows of students in the hallways waiting for their schedules. Boys all geared up with Levi's , True's , Meks , Polo , and Snapbacks. Girls had their hair , nails , and make-up done. Na'Chyla Murry , India Gordon , Courtney Williams , and Amaya Stewart walked in the buliding , looking fly as always. "C.B.B in this bitch". Na'Chyla hollered out. Niggas started to hoot and girls sneak-dissing as usual. "Ah , Hell naw look at this line." said Amaya complaining. "Shit'd let's come back tomorrow."Star said already walking away. As they walked out the door , they saw the C.W.P Boys: Dominic Santos , De'veon Skillz , Demitrius Regan , Miles Turner , and Tramell Johnson. "Hurry up and go this way" Courtney snapped trying not to be seen by De'veon. "Okay Ma , replied India. When they walked passed Dominic stopped Na'Chyla. "Wassup fake best friend" "Oh Hey Dominic , she replied while giving him a hug. "Damn , this nigga smell so good." she thought "Where y'all about to go ?" asked Demitrius "Wait I ain't know my daddy was here" India said rolling her eyes. The girls started laughing and walking away. "Chill with us today." a voice said behind them "What the fuck ! " India exclaimed turning around to see all the boys right there. "Why should we ?" asked Amaya. "Cause we want y'all too , plus we cashin out at the mall." said Dominic. "Fine ! , We'll go answered Courtney. "Y'all can go but I'm going back home." said Na'Chyla , plus I have to work later on tonight and tomorrow. Na'chyla threw her hands in the air and walked away. She was at her car , when she saw Dominic behind her through the window. "What boy ?" I'm not going point blank-period. "Yes you are." he replied with a smirk on his face. "No I'm nottttttttttttt." He picked her up as she screamed. Doiminc Jayshawn Santos put me down now !!!!!!!!!!!! ." No, Na'Chyla Janay Murry." said laughing hard while she tried to fight her way free. "KIDNAPPED , I'm being kidnapped . She gave up fighting , "You know i can walk right." "I Know but you smell and feel so good " ,he thought. He carried her all the way back to the group. "You wanna ride with me ?" Dominic asked Na'Chyla. "I'm with you " , she replied. The whole group went to the mall , skating , movies , and out to eat. That night India and Na'Chyla had to be carried. When they went skating , they crashed into everybody on the floor. Everybody , even the DJ was laughing at them. The boys bought everything except Dominic , Na'Chyla wouldn't let him buy her anything cause it didn't feel right. Chapter 2 : Back To Basics Even though Na'Chlya is bow - legged , she walked even fucked up because of the incident that happened yesterday. In the lobby she waited until she recieved her schedule. The secetary Ms.Merangue was printing it out , Na'Chyla turned her head to see a fine ass boy with green eyes walking pass. "Well Damn !" , Ms.Merangue cleared her throat. "My bad , Bitch." she said under her breath . When she walked away , looking at her schedule her eyes were covered. "I will beat the fuckk out of you , If you don't move your hands from my eyes." Na'Chyla said snapping. The hands were lifted , it was India. "What section you in ?" India asked , "Uh ,secion C3 replied Na'Chyla. "Me too ." yelled India , "Great stuck with you again." she said rolling her eyes. When they found their classroom and opened the door , a whole bumch of paper balls came flying out their way. "Aye , muthafuckas calm all that shit down." , yelled Na'Chyla. "Shut up girl , you ain't go do shit." said a voice that sounded familiar. "Revieon." squealed Na'Chyla. When she looked up , she noticed half of her niggas from the previous year and new faces also. "Where the teacher at ?" "Shit , like we know the balls was for him. "Don't nobody care but your teacher pet ass." a girl name Adrienna stated "Don't start with me." she said , Amaya walked in with an attitude "Why bitches gotta start in the morning ?" The teacher walked in soon after that , he introduced himself as Mr.Picchi he was the homeroom teacher. As he was giving the norms and regulations , there was a knock on the door. "This is my class , I had the wrong room." said a voice that made Na'Chyla Sink in her desk. Girls was makin comments about the boy that stood six foot four , had grey eyes , braces , and a face that would have you melt where you stand. Dominic came in and set right next to Na'Chyla and behind India. Na'Chyla wanted to tell him , taht she saw Adrienna and him together at the beach. He smiled at her and stood right back up. "I'm Na'Chyla's so can't nobody have me." All the girl had smart shit to say after that. "Dominic , stop lying shut up and sit down." He sat down and winked at her. She stucked up the middle finger , and turned her back on him the best way she could. At lunch Dominic and his crew started a food fight , which led to a real fight between De'veon and this line backer. Everybody got detention for two weeks , before they left the lunchroom this sophmore had beemed apple sauce at the security guard Chapter 3 : Hard Knock Life The next day at school seemed so dull and boring. Didn't nothing hype happened , not even at lunch. Even the teachers and security officers looked bored. The only thing that was exciting was Chemistry. When the day ended , everybody was cheering that the day was over. Amaya and Na'chyla were walking together because they had to go to work. "Man , I don't wan to go." whined Na'Chyla "Aye , we still beefing with those hoes from across the street ?" asked Amaya. "I don't even know or care." she replied. Across the street India had already crossed to where Dren's High is at. Some girls were standing there talking , but stopped when they saw India. "What school you go to ?" one asked her. India pointed to C.M.H. , the girl smiled and punched India dead in the eye. Everybody started running over there , Amaya and Na'Chyla followed. They dropped their stuff , when they saw it was India. They automatically started throwing punches left to right. One girl ripped opened Na'Chyla's shirt , exposing tattoos and orange bra she was wearing. Someone was pulling her and telling her to stop , but she wouldn't let that girl go. Whoever was pulling her was strong but she kept on fighting. They was talking shit while beating they ass. Na'Chyla had got picked up in the air and was hauled away from the crowd. She didn't care who it was , cause she got away. She continued to beat the hell out of different girls. They still kept fighting even when teachers came out there. A girl had gotten on top of Na'Chyla , she didn't do know damage but she felt a sharp pain in her side. She made a high pitch scream , police sirens began to come close. Dominic grabbed her and yelled "STOP" , she began to fight him off of her, He ignored her and put her in the car with Amaya. "Those hoes are dead , Bro." she said , "You got to go to the hospital." Dominic said , "I ain't going nowhere." she croaked feeling dizzy and weak. She lifted her shirt and almost had an panic attack when she saw all that blood and the size of the hole in her. "UGH , I'm just go clean it." she said in a daze , "Dawg , you fucked up." Amaya stated . "Maybe , but i kicked ass though." Na'Chyla said falling asleep. When she woke up , she looked confused and crazy. "Where am I ?" , "Somewhere I can do anything to you." said Dominic trying to sound creepy. "Shut up nigga , and go fuck yourself." "Why would I do that if you here ?" They started laughing at each other , she sighed and stretched. "I need to go home before Step-Bitch make a big deal out of nothing." She winced at the pain in her side , she touched it and noticed she had stitches. "You didn't !" she said in a low voice , "I had to , you was bleeding out." Dominic said in a concern voice. She got up and got on top of him. "You really care , Huh ? " , he looked at her like she was dumb and got her off of him. "Anyway , I still need to go home." "Stay here with me." he said giving her the puppy dog eyes. "I can't , my bed is calling me. "So...... you just go leave me here ? " "Naw , you can come with me and Brian coming by with Lil Davon." Forreal ? , I haven't seen that nigga in some months." She had got up and lost her balance . but he caught her , he picked her up and carried her outside. "How long you go carry me ?" "However long you need me to carry you." he replied , while kissing her on her forehead. "Come on Maya , we leaving." Na'Chyla said. I'm coming , she said yelling after she got up she tripped over a cord. Na'Chyla started laughing that's what you get." Text: Narissa Thorpe Images: Narissa Thorpe Editing: Narissa Thorpe Translation: Narissa Thorpe All rights reserved. Publication Date: August 22nd 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-rissababy
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-by-chanel-g-ashmon-and-ellie-a-willson-troubled-crazy-or-something-else/
By: Chanel G. Ashmon, and Ellie A. Willson Troubled, Crazy, or Something else? a teen novel to Julie Halpern for helping me realize how fun it is to write about mental hospitals, and to The sleepover that started it all Chapter 1 "Troubled" I stood there, wishing my father could be there. But on the other hand I was glad he was up there, waiting to welcome her to her new “life”. I couldn’t help feeling a little selfish by wanting him to be here to comfort me instead of there. Although, I guess he deserves to have a little bit of paradise after watching me screw up for the past ten years. My eyes narrowed as Aunt Susan sobbed loudly from behind me. Jeez, can’t I mourn in peace for one minute? I felt like every moment someone who didn’t understand was telling me how they felt my pain, and someone who barely knew her was weeping like a two-year-old. I was her daughter. Me. I was the one who’s life had been turned upside down, the one who’d been left to pick up the pieces and act mature for the second time in only sixteen years. And I felt like it was my responsibility to my dad to be strong and grown up. And now I guess for her too. Except what nobody can see is that deep down I’m still just a child. I know, it’s appalling. How can I view myself as a kid when I’m almost legally an adult? Could it have something to do with the fact that my childhood ended at nine, when my dad was diagnosed with cancer? Probably. I watched the bored looking worker guys lower what was just another casket to them into a hole while a priest droned on and on about how everything happened for a reason and how she will go on to a better life. All I could think was how there was no way that life could be better without me in it. I know it sounds snotty, but my mother loved me more than anything, except for maybe my father. Who loved me more than anything but my mom. And now they’re both gone. Yay me. The priest handed me a shovel to throw the first clump of dirt in. The first clump of the pile that would trap my mother underground. The last time I had done this, my mother had held it with me and whispered to me that the body wasn’t my father, my father was all around me, and especially in my heart. And he still is, I can still hear his voice sometimes, calling me Lily-bear. Now my mothers carefree laughter that had become so rare joins him. Which is nice. I loved her laugh. So I gritted my teeth and closed my eyes, picturing my father holding the shovel with me, and threw the dirt in. I knew I was supposed to step back, but I didn’t want to leave my mother’s side. I turned and handed the shovel to my step-dad anyway. Then I watched silently as he threw the dirt in indifferently. Aunt Susie followed, then Uncle Ken, Cousin May, Cousin Gary, and so on, getting me more and more upset. These were the relatives who were too lazy to visit on thanksgiving, the old friends who forgot to call on birthdays, and that terrible step-dad, Ray, who bossed her around and never treated her with the love and respect my father had. I guess I wasn’t as mature as I thought because all the sadness turned into anger when I saw Mr. Brown, my nosy neighbor, grab the shovel. Mr. Brown who looked through our windows, and tried to get our dog sent back to the pound. “Sit back down!” I shouted, yanking the shovel from his hands. Everyone in the room stared, shocked, but I ignored them. “This is my mothers funeral, do you understand that word? It means a service for the people close to her to mourn her death. Did you love my mother?” I yelled as he just open and closed his mouth soundlessly. I wasn’t looking for an answer anyway and he knew it. “No you didn’t. You threatened to sue her for every little thing and creeped around our house. Do you even know her middle name? You don’t. You don’t even know the kind of flower that makes her smile when she’s crying, or how she loves to paint people’s nails, or her dream of writing a book, or-” My Aunt Susan rushed over, “Honey, it’s okay, we understand how you feel, but-” “NO YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND!!! How could you possibly understand what it feels like to lose the two most special people in your life? You’re not her daughter!” My voice cracked, tears flowing down my face, and I turned and ran into the forest. Everyone stared, motionless, except for one. My step-dad's eyes narrowed, but he stood still. I sprinted as fast as I could, finally letting out the tears that had stung my eyes for the past week, since I saw my mom lying motionless in the passenger’s seat across from me. Ray and I had avoided serious injury because the trucker had been on the right side when he crashed into us. My tears blurred my vision, and just as I was thinking that maybe continuing to run was a bad idea, I ran into a tree. I clutched my head in my hands and fell to my knees, sobbing to hard to curse. I leaned against the violent tree and stared at my hands, seeing through the tears the red blood from my head. My shoulders sagged in defeat, and I dropped my hands, ready to let myself bleed to death. “Lilli?” Guess that wasn’t happening. “Lillian! You’re bleeding! What happened?” Jake rushed over to moi me, ripped the bottom of his shirt, and pressed it against my head. “No Jake,” I said, pushing his hand away, “Just let it”. “Are you crazy??” He pushed my hand down forcefully and put the cloth back against my forehead. Then Jake moved to put his arm around me, and waited silently while I cried. After a while I quieted down, and Jake turned to look at me. “Lilli, I’m not going to pretend I understand how you’re feeling, and I’m not going to try and tell you it’s okay, but I will tell you that you’re not alone. I’m here for you, and I will be here whenever you need me.” I stared, touched at his sweetness. 0nly now do I know that it was a lie. I sniffed, and wiped my eyes. It was the only non-idiotic thing anyone had said to me about my mother. “Are you ready to go back?” I took a deep, slightly shaky breath and nodded. Jake stood and held his hand out to me. I took it. He held me steady until my legs felt stronger, and then gave me a small reassuring smile. I surprised myself by returning it. Then I squared my shoulders and hand in hand we turned to walk back to the waiting crowd. Chapter 2 "home with Ray weeee -_- " Turns out they weren’t waiting. Most of them had already gone home. Ray had been waiting grumpily, and the second he saw me he marched over, grabbed my arm, and pulled me away from Jake to the car. Great. I thought as I sat in the backseat. Home with Ray. Weee. See, me and Ray didn’t exactly ‘get along’. At all. Plus he hated my boyfriend, Jake, with a red hot passion. If he had his way I’d be in a convent and Jake would be fighting in the army, which was Ray’s idea of a proper profession, but yet he’s an accountant. When the subject was brought up he always said some bullshit about a poor heart and how he was prone to heart attacks. So why wasn’t he the one who died? “You ’re a real drama queen y’know. Making a big show and trying to get everyone to feel sorry for you and come look for you in the woods. You had made such a scene and embarrassed me, and I had to insist everyone go home and not worry about you.” That explains it I thought. The jackass told them all to forget about me. Thank goodness Jake ignored him. “I’m sorry,” I said, not meaning it at all. But I figured if I didn’t say something he could have just kept going on all day about how terrible I was. So I endured the ride in silence. I checked the clock for the billionth time. Yes midnight finally! I jumped out of bed, and tip-toed out of my room and across the hall. I pressed my ear against Ray’s door to hear his heavy snores. Cautiously, I made my way to the window in the bathroom, and down the escape tree. It had wooden rungs from the old tree-house my father had built. Ray had taken it down, complaining that it ‘blocked his view’. His view out of the bathroom window. Fortunately, he was lazy and hadn’t taken the time to take down all of it, so the ladder up and a few stray boards remained and were very useful. I met Jake at the bottom of the tree, and after a quick hug we silently moved away from the house, getting as far away as possible. In other words, the river along Beach Street. “So, how are you holding up?” Jake asked once we were far enough away from all the houses. “0h, Jakey,” I flung myself into his embrace, and he held me tight, rubbing my back gently, “I feel like I’m falling apart”. “At least you’re not a chicken, they get their heads cut off,” He said flatly. I laughed, sounding strange and hoarse after being so out of practice. He smiled at me, “There’s that laugh I love,” and then he whispered in my hear softly, “Don’t worry, I’ll put all your pieces together again,” He tucked my hair behind my ear, his hand lingering on my cheek. In his arms I really felt okay. I felt as if he was holding me together. Although my face was buried in his red and white plaid button-up shirt, I knew his deep brown eyes were staring, loving and worried, down at me. I pulled away a little, so that I could kiss him. He cupped my chin in his palm, gently tilting my face up towards his, placing his other hand on the small of my back. I ran my fingers through his messy short brown hair, and tasted the cinnamon flavor of his lips as we kissed passionately under the faint glow of the moon. After a while, he pulled away just slightly, his lips still brushing mine as he spoke, “I love you so much Lilli”. I gazed up at him, searching his gorgeous eyes for…I don’t know. “Jake…I can’t. I just can’t let myself love again right now. The two people in the world I’ve loved the most…are gone. Please understand”. “I do,” he said, even though his eyes looked like an abandoned puppy’s. Despite myself, my heart stung. I stared at my feet. “Can you take me home?” I asked quietly. “0f course,” Jake said, and took my hand. We walked back in to my house in silence. At the tree, he silently whispered a goodbye in my ear and pecked me on the cheek. I gave him a parting glance and hurried up the tree, through the window, and across the hall to cry into my pillow. I had no idea that just as he finally turned to leave, a firm hand clamped down on his shoulder. “We need to talk,” Ray said menacingly. “Uh-M-Mr. Wolph I was just um-” Jake stammered. “I know what you were doing. And it’s going to stop. All of this is” “Wh-what do you mean-Sir?” “You are going to break up with Lillian. Tomorrow,” Ray said sternly. Jake’s eyes widened to the size of golf balls. “Why?!” “My reasons are personal. But if you know what’s best for you-and for Lillian-then I had better never see you around here again”. “But I’m in love with Lilli!” Jake blurted. Ray’s eyes narrowed. “And I hate the little demon. And I’d have no trouble hurting her if you decided to ignore my strong suggestion. Understand?” Jake was silent, awestruck. Ray simply left him there. My cell phone rang, a boring, default tone. I had never bothered to change it. I picked it up, and almost smiled when I saw Jakey <3 on the screen. “Hello?” I said. “Hey, um Lilli? Uh, it’s Jake” His voice sounded strange. “Yeah…I know” “Um, meet me at the river-wait no I like that place-I mean um…meet me at the really bad ice cream shop”. “Wait, what?” I looked down at the screen. He had already hung up. What is going on? I thought as I grabbed my bag and headed downstairs. “Where are you going?” Ray suddenly blocked the doorway, arms folded. 0h crap. “To meet Jake” I said, defeated. “0h, well, have fun” My head jolted up, but Ray was already walking away, avoiding my gaze. Well, whatever, I ran as fast as I could before he could sober up. “Jakey!” I smiled, and held my arms out for a hug. He stood motionless, avoiding my gaze even more than Ray had. My arms dropped and my smile faded. I waited for him to say something, but he was silent. “Jakey?” I asked quietly. “I…” Jake took a deep breath and squared his shoulders, finally looking up at my, but still avoiding my eyes, “I’m breaking up with you”. It seemed like the tears had been waiting for this, because the flowed instantly. I was not quite so prepared. I gasped, and stumbled backwards. “But-Jakey, why??” I asked, my voice cracking. He looked back at his shoes, his face a mask of pain. This didn’t make sense. “I-Lilli…I’m sorry, but I have to-” He turned, unable to finish. After a moment, he began to walk away. And at that moment I realized no matter how hard I fought it, I loved him. “Jake! Wait! I L0VE Y0U!!!” I screamed, desperate. He froze. His head turned just the slightest bit and I saw the glisten of tears on his cheek. What??? But he was already gone. Chapter 3 from terrible to impossible The days passed in a blur. Had it been two? Six? Ten? Who cared? My father was dead, my mother was dead, and my boyfr- ex-boyfriend- hated me and my life sucked. Tarra kept calling me. I shut my phone off. Ray ignored me, as usual. I pretty much just…existed. Nothing more. Until that night… “What are you doing?” Ray asked, coming into the room. “Watching television” I answered flatly. “It’s off” I blinked, and sure enough, it was. I had been sitting on the couch with a untouched slice of pizza for two hours. “I like it better black” Ray walked over to the couch where I was lying, and stood over me. He would have covered me in his shadow had we been outside. He was insanely muscular, and Italian, like a mafia guy. Yet he was an accountant, “Go to your room, now”. “Whatever” I walked up to my room and stared out the window at the passing cars. I saw a movement out of the corner of my eye, then turned to see that Ray had followed me up. I stared at him, questioning. He ignored my look and within an instant had pushed me onto the bed. “What are you doing?!?!?!?!?!” I was petrified. “I’m gonna teach you how to be a woman” He had a sinister look in his eyes as he ripped open my blouse. The buttons went flying in all directions, but he ignored them. “NO, DON’T!” I pleaded, but he covered my mouth and pressed his body against mine. It stung I blanked out after that the sounds of my screams echoing in my ears, I still can feel his rough hands violating the only bit of childhood I had left. I lay in my bed, I felt so dirty. I kept thinking about how the priest said everything was a part of God’s plan. Well his plan sucked. Then I got to thinking about my mom and dad, up there in heaven, waiting for me so they could have a paradise all together with our family again. The doors and windows were all locked, but I could still use the bathroom. I tip-toed across the hall ten times quieter than I had that night with Jake. I hid myself in the shower anyway, just in case. I opened the medicine cabinet with a shaky hand, and pulled out my lexipro, that my therapist (required for people with two dead parents. Wonder why) had demanded I take, ‘just in case’. I filled a paper cup with water, and then I emptied about twenty into my palm and swallowed them, one by one. I passed out within ten minutes. I opened my eyes, and in heaven I was not, and oh god Ray was at my side and I was in a hospital. FML. “You can go I wanna talk to her alone” Rays said to a near by nurse, and she scurried off before I could stop her. “I’m gonna tell them Ray you can’t hide me forever” “0h honey, I don’t have to,” He said with an evil grin on his face, “You’ll be in the Foundation for the Mentally Impaired, or FMI, soon enough. And good luck getting anyone to believe some crazy story from a girl who’s mentally unstable”. I turned away from Ray hoping the nurse would hurry back, looking at him brought back those horrifying memories. I tried to process what he had said, I wasn’t a crazy, I was just…done. Done with this life. But then it dawned on me, he didn’t care. It was just a perfect solution to his little dilemma. A dead step daughter would cause to many questions and a police investigation. To make his life easier he had to play the part of the concerned stepdad so I’d be sent away, and his life would be that much simpler. Ray walks away as the nurse comes back with water and some pills I had to take. More pills? How ironic I thought… Chapter 4 FMI (Fuck My Insanity) As I rode in the car to the FMI, I couldn’t help thinking that this might be a good thing. They may put me in a jail cell full of loony toons, but at least I was far away from Ray  Text: Chanel Ashmon and Ellie Wilson Images: cover image found online i do not own it. All rights reserved. Publication Date: July 25th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-curioucutie3
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-william-shakespeare-twelfth-night/
William Shakespeare Twelfth Night or, What You Will DRAMATIS PERSONAE ORSINO, Duke of Illyria SEBASTIAN, brother to Viola ANTONIO, a sea captain, friend to Sebastian A SEA CAPTAIN, friend to Viola VALENTINE, gentleman attending on the Duke CURIO, gentleman attending on the Duke SIR TOBY BELCH, uncle to Olivia SIR ANDREW AGUECHEEK MALVOLIO, steward to Olivia FABIAN, servant to Olivia FESTE, a clown, servant to Olivia OLIVIA, a rich countess VIOLA MARIA, Olivia's waiting woman Lords, Priests, Sailors, Officers, Musicians, and other Attendants SCENE: A city in Illyria, and the sea-coast near it ACT I. SCENE I. An apartment in the DUKE'S palace. [Enter DUKE, CURIO, and other LORDS; MUSICIANS attending.] DUKE. If music be the food of love, play on; Give me excess of it, that, surfeiting, The appetite may sicken and so die. That strain again! It had a dying fall; O, it came o'er my ear like the sweet sound That breathes upon a bank of violets, Stealing and giving odour! Enough; no more; 'T is not so sweet now as it was before. O spirit of love, how quick and fresh art thou! That, notwithstanding thy capacity Receiveth as the sea, nought enters there, Of what validity and pitch soe'er, But falls into abatement and low price, Even in a minute! so full of shapes is fancy That it alone is high fantastical. CURIO. Will you go hunt, my lord? DUKE. What, Curio? CURIO. The hart. DUKE. Why, so I do, the noblest that I have. O, when mine eyes did see Olivia first, Methought she purg'd the air of pestilence! That instant was I turn'd into a hart; And my desires, like fell and cruel hounds, E'er since pursue me. [Enter VALENTINE.] How now! what news from her? VALENTINE. So please my lord, I might not be admitted, But from her handmaid do return this answer: The element itself, till seven years' heat, Shall not behold her face at ample view; But, like a cloistress, she will veiled walk And water once a day her chamber round With eye-offending brine; all this to season A brother's dead love, which she would keep fresh And lasting in her sad remembrance. DUKE. O, she that hath a heart of that fine frame To pay this debt of love but to a brother, How will she love when the rich golden shaft Hath kill'd the flock of all affections else That live in her; when liver, brain, and heart, These sovereign thrones, are all supplied, and fill'd - Her sweet perfections - with one self king! Away before me to sweet beds of flow'rs; Love-thoughts lie rich when canopied with bow'rs. [Exeunt.] SCENE II. The sea-coast. [Enter VIOLA, a CAPTAIN, and SAILORS.] VIOLA. What country, friends, is this? CAPTAIN. This is Illyria, lady. VIOLA. And what should I do in Illyria? My brother he is in Elysium. Perchance he is not drown'd. What think you, sailors? CAPTAIN. It is perchance that you yourself were sav'd. VIOLA. O my poor brother! and so perchance may he be. CAPTAIN. True, madam: and, to comfort you with chance, Assure yourself, after our ship did split, When you, and those poor number sav'd with you, Hung on our driving boat, I saw your brother, Most provident in peril, bind himself, Courage and hope both teaching him the practice, To a strong mast that liv'd upon the sea; Where, like Arion on the dolphin's back, I saw him hold acquaintance with the waves So long as I could see. VIOLA. For saying so, there's gold: Mine own escape unfoldeth to my hope, Whereto thy speech serves for authority, The like of him. Know'st thou this country? CAPTAIN. Ay, madam, well; for I was bred and born Not three hours' travel from this very place. VIOLA. Who governs here? CAPTAIN. A noble duke, in nature as in name. VIOLA. What is his name? CAPTAIN. Orsino. VIOLA. Orsino! I have heard my father name him; He was a bachelor then. CAPTAIN. And so is now, or was so very late; For but a month ago I went from hence, And then 'twas fresh in murmur - as, you know, What great ones do the less will prattle of - That he did seek the love of fair Olivia. VIOLA. What's she? CAPTAIN. A virtuous maid, the daughter of a count That died some twelvemonth since, then leaving her In the protection of his son, her brother, Who shortly also died; for whose dear love, They say, she hath abjur'd the company And sight of men. VIOLA. O that I serv'd that lady, And might not be delivered to the world, Till I had made mine own occasion mellow, What my estate is! CAPTAIN. That were hard to compass, Because she will admit no kind of suit, No, not the duke's. VIOLA. There is a fair behaviour in thee, captain; And though that nature with a beauteous wall Doth oft close in pollution, yet of thee I will believe thou hast a mind that suits With this thy fair and outward character. I prithee, and I'll pay thee bounteously, Conceal me what I am, and be my aid For such disguise as haply shall become The form of my intent. I'll serve this duke: Thou shalt present me as an eunuch to him; It may be worth thy pains, for I can sing And speak to him in many sorts of music That will allow me very worth his service. What else may hap, to time I will commit; Only shape thou silence to my wit. CAPTAIN. Be you his eunuch, and your mute I'll be; When my tongue blabs, then let mine eyes not see. VIOLA. I thank thee; lead me on. [Exeunt.] SCENE III. OLIVIA'S house. [Enter SIR TOBY BELCH and MARIA.] SIR TOBY. What a plague means my niece, to take the death of her brother thus? I am sure care's an enemy to life. MARIA. By my troth, Sir Toby, you must come in earlier o' nights; your cousin, my lady, takes great exceptions to your ill hours. SIR TOBY. Why, let her except before excepted. MARIA. Ay, but you must confine yourself within the modest limits of order. SIR TOBY. Confine! I'll confine myself no finer than I am. These clothes are good enough to drink in, and so be these boots too; and they be not, let them hang themselves in their own straps. MARIA. That quaffing and drinking will undo you. I heard my lady talk of it yesterday, and of a foolish knight that you brought in one night here to be her wooer. SIR TOBY. Who, Sir Andrew Aguecheek? MARIA. Ay, he. SIR TOBY. He's as tall a man as any's in Illyria. MARIA. What's that to th' purpose? SIR TOBY. Why, he has three thousand ducats a year. MARIA. Ay, but he'll have but a year in all these ducats; he's a very fool and a prodigal. SIR TOBY. Fie, that you'll say so! he plays o' th' viol-de-gamboys, and speaks three or four languages word for word without book, and hath all the good gifts of nature. MARIA. He hath indeed, almost natural; for, besides that he's a fool, he's a great quarreller; and but that he hath the gift of a coward to allay the gust he hath in quarrelling, 'tis thought among the prudent he would quickly have the gift of a grave. SIR TOBY. By this hand, they are scoundrels and subtractors that say so of him. Who are they? MARIA. They that add, moreover, he's drunk nightly in your company. SIR TOBY. With drinking healths to my niece. I'll drink to her as long as there is a passage in my throat and drink in Illyria: he's a coward and a coystrill that will not drink to my niece till his brains turn o' th' toe like a parish-top. What, wench! Castiliano vulgo! for here comes Sir Andrew Agueface. [Enter SIR ANDREW AGUECHEEK.] SIR ANDREW. Sir Toby Belch; how now, Sir Toby Belch! SIR TOBY. Sweet Sir Andrew! SIR ANDREW. Bless you, fair shrew. MARIA. And you too, sir. SIR TOBY. Accost, Sir Andrew, accost. SIR ANDREW. What's that? SIR TOBY. My niece's chambermaid. SIR ANDREW. Good Mistress Accost, I desire better acquaintance. MARIA. My name is Mary, sir. SIR ANDREW. Good Mistress Mary Accost, - SIR TOBY. You mistake, knight; 'accost' is front her, board her, woo her, assail her. SIR ANDREW. By my troth, I would not undertake her in this company. Is that the meaning of 'accost'? MARIA. Fare you well, gentlemen. SIR TOBY. An thou let part so, Sir Andrew, would thou mightst never draw sword again. SIR ANDREW. And you part so, mistress, I would I might never draw sword again. Fair lady, do you think you have fools in hand? MARIA. Sir, I have not you by th' hand. SIR ANDREW. Marry, but you shall have; and here's my hand. MARIA. Now, sir, 'thought is free.' I pray you, bring your hand to th' buttery-bar and let it drink. SIR ANDREW. Wherefore, sweet-heart? what's your metaphor? MARIA. It's dry, sir. SIR ANDREW. Why, I think so; I am not such an ass but I can keep my hand dry. But what's your jest? MARIA. A dry jest, sir. SIR ANDREW. Are you full of them? MARIA. Ay, sir, I have them at my fingers' ends; marry, now I let go your hand, I am barren. [Exit.] SIR TOBY. O knight, thou lack'st a cup of canary; when did I see thee so put down? SIR ANDREW. Never in your life, I think; unless you see canary put me down. Methinks sometimes I have no more wit than a Christian or an ordinary man has; but I am a great eater of beef, and I believe that does harm to my wit. SIR TOBY. No question. SIR ANDREW. And I thought that, I'd forswear it. I'll ride home to-morrow, Sir Toby. SIR TOBY. Pourquoi, my dear knight? SIR ANDREW. What is 'pourquoi'? do or not do? I would I had bestow'd that time in the tongues that I have in fencing, dancing, and bear-baiting! O, had I but follow'd the arts! SIR TOBY. Then hadst thou had an excellent head of hair. SIR ANDREW. Why, would that have mended my hair? SIR TOBY. Past question; for thou seest it will not curl by nature. SIR ANDREW. But it becomes me well enough, does't not? SIR TOBY. Excellent; it hangs like flax on a distaff. SIR ANDREW. Faith, I'll home to-morrow, Sir Toby. Your niece will not be seen; or, if she be, it's four to one she'll none of me: the count himself here hard by wooes her. SIR TOBY. She'll none o' th' count. She'll not match above her degree, neither in estate, years, nor wit; I have heard her swear't. Tut, there's life in't, man. SIR ANDREW. I'll stay a month longer. I am a fellow o' th' strangest mind i' th' world; I delight in masques and revels sometimes altogether. SIR TOBY. Art thou good at these kickshawses, knight? SIR ANDREW. As any man in Illyria, whatsoever he be, under the degree of my betters; and yet I will not compare with an old man. SIR TOBY. What is thy excellence in a galliard, knight? SIR ANDREW. Faith, I can cut a caper. SIR TOBY. And I can cut the mutton to't. SIR ANDREW. And I think I have the back-trick simply as strong as any man in Illyria. SIR TOBY. Wherefore are these things hid? wherefore have these gifts a curtain before 'em? are they like to take dust, like Mistress Mall's picture? why dost thou not go to church in a galliard, and come home in a coranto? My very walk should be a jig. What dost thou mean? is it a world to hide virtues in? I did think, by the excellent constitution of thy leg, it was form'd under the star of a galliard. SIR ANDREW. Ay, 't is strong, and it does indifferent well in flame-colour'd stock. Shall we set about some revels? SIR TOBY. What shall we do else? were we not born under Taurus? SIR ANDREW. Taurus! That's sides and heart. SIR TOBY. No, sir; it is legs and thighs. Let me see the caper. Ha! higher! ha, ha, excellent! [Exeunt.] SCENE IV. The DUKE'S palace. [Enter VALENTINE, and VIOLA in man's attire.] VALENTINE. If the duke continue these favours towards you, Cesario, you are like to be much advanc'd. He hath known you but three days, and already you are no stranger. VIOLA. You either fear his humour or my negligence, that you call in question the continuance of his love. Is he inconstant, sir, in his favours? VALENTINE. No, believe me. VIOLA. I thank you. Here comes the Count. [Enter DUKE, CURIO, and ATTENDANTS.] DUKE. Who saw Cesario, ho? VIOLA. On your attendance, my lord; here. DUKE. Stand you awhile aloof. Cesario, Thou know'st no less but all; I have unclasp'd To thee the book even of my secret soul. Therefore, good youth, address thy gait unto her; Be not denied access, stand at her doors, And tell them, there thy fixed foot shall grow Till thou have audience. VIOLA. Sure, my noble lord, If she be so abandon'd to her sorrow As it is spoke, she never will admit me. DUKE. Be clamorous and leap all civil bounds Rather than make unprofited return. VIOLA. Say I do speak with her, my lord, what then? DUKE. O, then unfold the passion of my love, Surprise her with discourse of my dear faith! It shall become thee well to act my woes; She will attend it better in thy youth Than in a nuncio's of more grave aspect. VIOLA. I think not so, my lord. DUKE. Dear lad, believe it; For they shall yet belie thy happy years, That say thou art a man: Diana's lip Is not more smooth and rubious; thy small pipe Is as the maiden's organ, shrill and sound, And all is semblative a woman's part. I know thy constellation is right apt For this affair. Some four or five attend him; All, if you will; for I myself am best When least in company. Prosper well in this, And thou shalt live as freely as thy lord, To call his fortunes thine. VIOLA. I'll do my best To woo your lady, - [Aside] yet, a barful strife! Whoe'er I woo, myself would be his wife. [Exeunt.] SCENE V. OLIVIA'S house. [Enter MARIA and CLOWN.] MARIA. Nay, either tell me where thou hast been, or I will not open my lips so wide as a bristle may enter in way of thy excuse. My lady will hang thee for thy absence. CLOWN. Let her hang me. He that is well hang'd in this world needs to fear no colours. MARIA. Make that good. CLOWN. He shall see none to fear. MARIA. A good lenten answer. I can tell thee where that saying was born, of 'I fear no colours.' CLOWN. Where, good Mistress Mary? MARIA. In the wars; and that may you be bold to say in your foolery. CLOWN. Well, God give them wisdom that have it; and those that are fools, let them use their talents. MARIA. Yet you will be hang'd for being so long absent; or to be turn'd away, is not that as good as a hanging to you? CLOWN. Many a good hanging prevents a bad marriage; and, for turning away, let summer bear it out. MARIA. You are resolute, then? CLOWN. Not so, neither; but I am resolv'd on two points. MARIA. That, if one break, the other will hold; or, if both break, your gaskins fall. CLOWN. Apt, in good faith; very apt. Well, go thy way; if Sir Toby would leave drinking, thou wert as witty a piece of Eve's flesh as any in Illyria. MARIA. Peace, you rogue, no more o' that. Here comes my lady; make your excuse wisely, you were best. [Exit.] CLOWN. Wit, and 't be thy will, put me into good fooling! Those wits that think they have thee do very oft prove fools; and I, that am sure I lack thee, may pass for a wise man: for what says Quinapalus? 'Better a witty fool than a foolish wit.' [Enter LADY OLIVIA with MALVOLIO.] God bless thee, lady! OLIVIA. Take the fool away. CLOWN. Do you not hear, fellows? Take away the lady. OLIVIA. Go to, you're a dry fool; I'll no more of you: besides, you grow dishonest. CLOWN. Two faults, madonna, that drink and good counsel will amend; for, give the dry fool drink, then is the fool not dry: bid the dishonest man mend himself; if he mend, he is no longer dishonest; if he cannot, let the botcher mend him. Any thing that's mended is but patch'd; virtue that transgresses is but patch'd with sin; and sin that amends is but patch'd with virtue. If that this simple syllogism will serve, so; if it will not, what remedy? As there is no true cuckold but calamity, so beauty's a flower. The lady bade take away the fool; therefore, I say again, take her away. OLIVIA. Sir, I bade them take away you. CLOWN. Misprision in the highest degree! Lady, cucullus non facit monachum; that's as much to say as I wear not motley in my brain. Good madonna, give me leave to prove you a fool. OLIVIA. Can you do it? CLOWN. Dexteriously, good madonna. OLIVIA. Make your proof. CLOWN. I must catechize you for it, madonna; good my mouse of virtue, answer me. OLIVIA. Well, sir, for want of other idleness, I'll bide your proof. CLOWN. Good madonna, why mourn'st thou? OLIVIA. Good fool, for my brother's death. CLOWN. I think his soul is in hell, madonna. OLIVIA. I know his soul is in heaven, fool. CLOWN. The more fool, madonna, to mourn for your brother's soul being in heaven. Take away the fool, gentlemen. OLIVIA. What think you of this fool, Malvolio? doth he not mend? MALVOLIO. Yes, and shall do till the pangs of death shake him. Infirmity, that decays the wise, doth ever make the better fool. CLOWN. God send you, sir, a speedy infirmity, for the better increasing your folly! Sir Toby will be sworn that I am no fox; but he will not pass his word for twopence that you are no fool. OLIVIA. How say you to that, Malvolio? MALVOLIO. I marvel your ladyship takes delight in such a barren rascal; I saw him put down the other day with an ordinary fool that has no more brain than a stone. Look you now, he's out of his guard already; unless you laugh and minister occasion to him, he is gagg'd. I protest, I take these wise men, that crow so at these set kind of fools, no better than the fools' zanies. OLIVIA. O, you are sick of self-love, Malvolio, and taste with a distemper'd appetite. To be generous, guiltless, and of free disposition, is to take those things for bird-bolts that you deem cannon bullets. There is no slander in an allow'd fool, though he do nothing but rail; nor no railing in a known discreet man, though he do nothing but reprove. CLOWN. Now Mercury endue thee with leasing, for thou speak'st well of fools! [Re-enter MARIA.] MARIA. Madam, there is at the gate a young gentleman much desires to speak with you. OLIVIA. From the Count Orsino, is it? MARIA. I know not, madam; 't is a fair young man, and well attended. OLIVIA. Who of my people hold him in delay? MARIA. Sir Toby, madam, your kinsman. OLIVIA. Fetch him off, I pray you; he speaks nothing but madman: fie on him! [Exit MARIA.] Go you, Malvolio: if it be a suit from the count, I am sick, or not at home; what you will, to dismiss it. [Exit MALVOLIO.] Now you see, sir, how your fooling grows old, and people dislike it. CLOWN. Thou hast spoke for us, madonna, as if thy eldest son should be a fool; whose skull Jove cram with brains! for - here he comes - [Enter SIR TOBY.] one of thy kin has a most weak pia mater. OLIVIA. By mine honour, half drunk. What is he at the gate, cousin? SIR TOBY. A gentleman. OLIVIA. A gentleman! what gentleman? SIR TOBY. 'T is a gentleman here - a plague o' these pickle-herring! How now, sot! CLOWN. Good Sir Toby! OLIVIA. Cousin, cousin, how have you come so early by this lethargy? SIR TOBY. Lechery! I defy lechery. There's one at the gate. OLIVIA. Ay, marry, what is he? SIR TOBY. Let him be the devil, and he will, I care not; give me faith, say I. Well, it's all one. [Exit.] OLIVIA. What's a drunken man like, fool? CLOWN. Like a drown'd man, a fool, and a madman: one draught above heat makes him a fool; the second mads him; and a third drowns him. OLIVIA. Go thou and seek the crowner, and let him sit o' my coz; for he's in the third degree of drink, he's drown'd: go look after him. CLOWN. He is but mad yet, madonna; and the fool shall look to the madman. [Exit.] [Re-enter MALVOLIO.] MALVOLIO. Madam, yond young fellow swears he will speak with you. I told him you were sick; he takes on him to understand so much, and therefore comes to speak with you. I told him you were asleep; he seems to have a foreknowledge of that too, and therefore comes to speak with you. What is to be said to him, lady? he's fortified against any denial. OLIVIA. Tell him he shall not speak with me. MALVOLIO. Has been told so; and he says, he'll stand at your door like a sheriff's post, and be the supporter to a bench, but he'll speak with you. OLIVIA. What kind o' man is he? MALVOLIO. Why, of mankind. OLIVIA. What manner of man? MALVOLIO. Of very ill manner; he'll speak with you, will you or no. OLIVIA. Of what personage and years is he? MALVOLIO. Not yet old enough for a man, nor young enough for a boy; as a squash is before 't is a peascod, or a codling when 't is almost an apple: 't is with him in standing water, between boy and man. He is very well-favour'd, and he speaks very shrewishly; one would think his mother's milk were scarce out of him. OLIVIA. Let him approach. Call in my gentlewoman. MALVOLIO. Gentlewoman, my lady calls. [Exit.] [Re-enter MARIA.] OLIVIA. Give me my veil; come, throw it o'er my face; We'll once more hear Orsino's embassy. [Enter VIOLA, and ATTENDANTS.] VIOLA. The honourable lady of the house, which is she? OLIVIA. Speak to me; I shall answer for her. Your will? VIOLA. Most radiant, exquisite, and unmatchable beauty, - I pray you, tell me if this be the lady of the house, for I never saw her: I would be loth to cast away my speech; for, besides that it is excellently well penn'd, I have taken great pains to con it. Good beauties, let me sustain no scorn; I am very comptible, even to the least sinister usage. OLIVIA. Whence came you, sir? VIOLA. I can say little more than I have studied, and that question's out of my part. Good gentle one, give me modest assurance if you be the lady of the house, that I may proceed in my speech. OLIVIA. Are you a comedian? VIOLA. No, my profound heart; and yet, by the very fangs of malice I swear, I am not that I play. Are you the lady of the house? OLIVIA. If I do not usurp myself, I am. VIOLA. Most certain, if you are she, you do usurp yourself; for what is yours to bestow is not yours to reserve. But this is from my commission. I will on with my speech in your praise, and then show you the heart of my message. OLIVIA. Come to what is important in't; I forgive you the praise. VIOLA. Alas, I took great pains to study it, and 't is poetical. OLIVIA. It is the more like to be feign'd; I pray you, keep it in. I heard you were saucy at my gates, and allow'd your approach rather to wonder at you than to hear you. If you be not mad, be gone; if you have reason, be brief; 't is not that time of moon with me to make one in so skipping a dialogue. MARIA. Will you hoist sail, sir? here lies your way. VIOLA. No, good swabber; I am to hull here a little longer. Some mollification for your giant, sweet lady. Tell me your mind; I am a messenger. OLIVIA. Sure, you have some hideous matter to deliver, when the courtesy of it is so fearful. Speak your office. VIOLA. It alone concerns your ear. I bring no overture of war, no taxation of homage: I hold the olive in my hand; my words are as full of peace as matter. OLIVIA. Yet you began rudely. What are you? what would you? VIOLA. The rudeness that hath appear'd in me have I learn'd from my entertainment. What I am, and what I would, are as secret as maidenhead; to your ears, divinity; to any other's, profanation. OLIVIA. Give us the place alone; we will hear this divinity. [Exeunt MARIA and ATTENDANTS.] Now, sir, what is your text? VIOLA. Most sweet lady, - OLIVIA. A comfortable doctrine, and much may be said of it. Where lies your text? VIOLA. In Orsino's bosom. OLIVIA. In his bosom! In what chapter of his bosom? VIOLA. To answer by the method, in the first of his heart. OLIVIA. O, I have read it; it is heresy. Have you no more to say? VIOLA. Good madam, let me see your face. OLIVIA. Have you any commission from your lord to negotiate with my face? You are now out of your text; but we will draw the curtain, and show you the picture. Look you, sir, such a one I was this present; is 't not well done? [Unveiling.] VIOLA. Excellently done, if God did all. OLIVIA. 'T is in grain, sir; 't will endure wind and weather. VIOLA. 'T is beauty truly blent whose red and white Nature's own sweet and cunning hand laid on. Lady, you are the cruell'st she alive, If you will lead these graces to the grave, And leave the world no copy. OLIVIA. O, sir, I will not be so hard-hearted; I will give out divers schedules of my beauty. It shall be inventoried, and every particle and utensil labell'd to my will: as, item, two lips, indifferent red; item, two grey eyes, with lids to them; item, one neck, one chin, and so forth. Were you sent hither to praise me? VIOLA. I see you what you are, you are too proud; But, if you were the devil, you are fair. My lord and master loves you; O, such love Could be but recompens'd, though you were crown'd The nonpareil of beauty! OLIVIA. How does he love me? VIOLA. With adorations, fertile tears, With groans that thunder love, with sighs of fire. OLIVIA. Your lord does know my mind; I cannot love him: Yet I suppose him virtuous, know him noble, Of great estate, of fresh and stainless youth; In voices well divulg'd, free, learn'd, and valiant; And, in dimension and the shape of nature, A gracious person: but yet I cannot love him; He might have took his answer long ago. VIOLA. If I did love you in my master's flame, With such a suffering, such a deadly life, In your denial I would find no sense; I would not understand it. OLIVIA. Why, what would you? VIOLA. Make me a willow cabin at your gate, And call upon my soul within the house; Write loyal cantons of contemned love, And sing them loud even in the dead of night; Halloo your name to the reverberate hills, And make the babbling gossip of the air Cry out, 'Olivia!' O, you should not rest Between the elements of air and earth, But you should pity me! OLIVIA. You might do much. What is your parentage? VIOLA. Above my fortunes, yet my state is well; I am a gentleman. OLIVIA. Get you to your lord; I cannot love him: let him send no more; Unless, perchance, you come to me again, To tell me how he takes it. Fare you well; I thank you for your pains. Spend this for me. VIOLA. I am no fee'd post, lady; keep your purse: My master, not myself, lacks recompense. Love make his heart of flint that you shall love; And let your fervour, like my master's, be Plac'd in contempt! Farewell, fair cruelty. [Exit.] OLIVIA. 'What is your parentage?' 'Above my fortunes, yet my state is well; I am a gentleman.' I'll be sworn thou art; Thy tongue, thy face, thy limbs, actions, and spirit, Do give thee five-fold blazon. Not too fast! Soft, soft! Unless the master were the man. How now! Even so quickly may one catch the plague? Methinks I feel this youth's perfections With an invisible and subtle stealth To creep in at mine eyes. Well, let it be. What ho, Malvolio! [Re-enter MALVOLIO.] MALVOLIO. Here, madam, at your service. OLIVIA. Run after that same peevish messenger, The county's man: he left this ring behind him, Would I or not; tell him I'll none of it. Desire him not to flatter with his lord, Nor hold him up with hopes; I am not for him. If that the youth will come this way to-morrow, I'll give him reasons for't. Hie thee, Malvolio. MALVOLIO. Madam, I will. [Exit.] OLIVIA. I do I know not what; and fear to find Mine eye too great a flatterer for my mind. Fate, show thy force: ourselves we do not owe; What is decreed must be, and be this so! [Exit.] ACT II. SCENE I. The sea-coast [Enter ANTONIO and SEBASTIAN.] ANTONIO. Will you stay no longer; nor will you not that I go with you? SEBASTIAN. By your patience, no. My stars shine darkly over me: the malignancy of my fate might perhaps distemper yours; therefore I shall crave of you your leave that I may bear my evils alone: it were a bad recompense for your love, to lay any of them on you. ANTONIO. Let me know of you whither you are bound. SEBASTIAN. No, sooth, sir; my determinate voyage is mere extravagancy. But I perceive in you so excellent a touch of modesty that you will not extort from me what I am willing to keep in; therefore it charges me in manners the rather to express myself. You must know of me then, Antonio, my name is Sebastian, which I called Roderigo. My father was that Sebastian of Messaline whom I know you have heard of. He left behind him myself and a sister, both born in an hour. If the heavens had been pleas'd, would we had so ended! but you, sir, alter'd that; for some hour before you took me from the breach of the sea was my sister drown'd. ANTONIO. Alas the day! SEBASTIAN. A lady, sir, though it was said she much resembl'd me, was yet of many accounted beautiful; but, though I could not, with such estimable wonder, over-far believe that, yet thus far I will boldly publish her: she bore mind that envy could not but call fair. She is drown'd already, sir, with salt water, though I seem to drown her remembrance again with more. ANTONIO. Pardon me, sir, your bad entertainment. SEBASTIAN. O good Antonio, forgive me your trouble! ANTONIO. If you will not murder me for my love, let me be your servant. SEBASTIAN. If you will not undo what you have done, that is, kill him whom you have recover'd, desire it not. Fare ye well at once; my bosom is full of kindness, and I am yet so near the manners of my mother that upon the least occasion more mine eyes will tell tales of me. I am bound to the Count Orsino's court; farewell. [Exit.] ANTONIO. The gentleness of all the gods go with thee! I have many enemies in Orsino's court, Else would I very shortly see thee there. But, come what may, I do adore thee so That danger shall seem sport, and I will go. [Exit.] SCENE II. A street [Enter VIOLA, MALVOLIO following.] MALVOLIO. Were you not ev'n now with the Countess Olivia? VIOLA. Even now, sir; on a moderate pace I have since arriv'd but hither. MALVOLIO. She returns this ring to you, sir; you might have sav'd me my pains, to have taken it away yourself. She adds, moreover, that you should put your lord into a desperate assurance she will none of him; and one thing more, that you be never so hardy to come again in his affairs, unless it be to report your lord's taking of this. Receive it so. VIOLA. She took the ring of me; I'll none of it. MALVOLIO. Come, sir, you peevishly threw it to her; and her will is it should be so return'd. If it be worth stooping for, there it lies in your eye; if not, be it his that finds it. [Exit.] VIOLA. I left no ring with her; what means this lady? Fortune forbid my outside have not charm'd her! She made good view of me; indeed, so much That, methought, her eyes had lost her tongue, For she did speak in starts distractedly. She loves me, sure: the cunning of her passion Invites me in this churlish messenger. None of my lord's ring! why, he sent her none. I am the man. If it be so, as 't is, Poor lady, she were better love a dream. Disguise, I see thou art a wickedness, Wherein the pregnant enemy does much. How easy is it for the proper-false In women's waxen hearts to set their forms! Alas, our frailty is the cause, not we! For such as we are made of, such we be. How will this fadge? my master loves her dearly; And I, poor monster, fond as much on him, And she, mistaken, seems to dote on me. What will become of this? As I am man, My state is desperate for my master's love; As I am woman - now, alas the day! - What thriftless sighs shall poor Olivia breathe! O time, thou must untangle this, not I; It is too hard a knot for me to untie! [Exit.] SCENE III. OLIVIA'S house [Enter SIR TOBY and SIR ANDREW.] SIR TOBY. Approach, Sir Andrew: not to be a-bed after midnight is to be up betimes; and 'diluculo surgere,' thou know'st - SIR ANDREW. Nay, by my troth, I know not; but I know, to be up late is to be up late. SIR TOBY. A false conclusion; I hate it as an unfill'd can. To be up after midnight, and to go to bed then, is early; so that to go to bed after midnight is to go to bed betimes. Does not our life consist of the four elements? SIR ANDREW. Faith, so they say; but I think it rather consists of eating and drinking. SIR TOBY. Thou 'rt a scholar; let us therefore eat and drink. Marian, I say! a stoup of wine! [Enter CLOWN.] SIR ANDREW. Here comes the fool, i' faith. CLOWN. How now, my hearts! did you never see the picture of 'We Three'? SIR TOBY. Welcome, ass. Now let's have a catch. SIR ANDREW. By my troth, the fool has an excellent breast. I had rather than forty shillings I had such a leg, and so sweet a breath to sing, as the fool has. In sooth, thou wast in very gracious fooling last night, when thou spokest of Pigrogromitus, of the Vapians passing the equinoctial of Queubus; 't was very good, i' faith. I sent thee sixpence for thy leman; hadst it? CLOWN. I did impeticos thy gratillity; for Malvolio's nose is no whipstock; my lady has a white hand, and the Myrmidons are no bottle-ale houses. SIR ANDREW. Excellent! why, this is the best fooling, when all is done. Now, a song. SIR TOBY. Come on; there is sixpence for you: let's have a song. SIR ANDREW. There's a testril of me too. If one knight give a - CLOWN. Would you have a love-song, or a song of good life? SIR TOBY. A love-song, a love-song. SIR ANDREW. Ay, ay; I care not for good life. CLOWN. [Sings.] O mistress mine, where are you roaming? O, stay and hear; your true love's coming, That can sing both high and low: Trip no further, pretty sweeting; Journeys end in lovers meeting, Every wise man's son doth know. SIR ANDREW. Excellent good, i' faith. SIR TOBY. Good, good. CLOWN. [Sings.] What is love? 'T is not hereafter; Present mirth hath present laughter; What's to come is still unsure. In delay there lies no plenty, Then come kiss me, sweet and twenty, Youth's a stuff will not endure. SIR ANDREW. A mellifluous voice, as I am true knight. SIR TOBY. A contagious breath. SIR ANDREW. Very sweet and contagious, i' faith. SIR TOBY. To hear by the nose, it is dulcet in contagion. But shall we make the welkin dance indeed? shall we rouse the night-owl in a catch that will draw three souls out of one weaver? shall we do that? SIR ANDREW. And you love me, let's do 't; I am dog at a catch. CLOWN. By'r lady, sir, and some dogs will catch well. SIR ANDREW. Most certain. Let our catch be, 'Thou knave.' CLOWN. 'Hold thy peace, thou knave,' knight? I shall be constrain'd in 't to call thee knave, knight. SIR ANDREW. 'Tis not the first time I have constrain'd one to call me knave. Begin, fool: it begins, 'Hold thy peace.' CLOWN. I shall never begin, if I hold my peace. SIR ANDREW. Good, i' faith! Come, begin. [Catch sung.] [Enter MARIA.] MARIA. What a caterwauling do you keep here! If my lady have not call'd up her steward Malvolio, and bid him turn you out of doors, never trust me. SIR TOBY. My lady's a Cataian, we are politicians, Malvolio's a Peg-a-Ramsey, and 'Three merry men be we.' Am not I consanguineous? am I not of her blood? Tilly-vally; lady! [Sings.] 'There dwelt a man in Babylon, lady, lady!' CLOWN. Beshrew me, the knight's in admirable fooling. SIR ANDREW. Ay, he does well enough if he be dispos'd, and so do I too; he does it with a better grace, but I do it more natural. SIR TOBY. [Sings] 'O, the twelfth day of December,' - MARIA. For the love o' God, peace! [Enter MALVOLIO.] MALVOLIO. My masters, are you mad? or what are you? Have you no wit, manners, nor honesty, but to gabble like tinkers at this time of night? Do ye make an alehouse of my lady's house, that ye squeak out your coziers' catches without any mitigation or remorse of voice? Is there no respect of place, persons, nor time, in you? SIR TOBY. We did keep time, sir, in our catches. Sneck up! MALVOLIO. Sir Toby, I must be round with you. My lady bade me tell you that, though she harbours you as her kins-man, she's nothing allied to your disorders. If you can separate yourself and your misdemeanours, you are welcome to the house; if not, and it would please you to take leave of her, she is very willing to bid you farewell. SIR TOBY. 'Farewell, dear heart, since I must needs be gone.' MARIA. Nay, good Sir Toby. CLOWN. 'His eyes do show his days are almost done.' MALVOLIO. Is 't even so? SIR TOBY. 'But I will never die.' CLOWN. Sir Toby, there you lie. MALVOLIO. This is much credit to you. SIR TOBY. 'Shall I bid him go?' CLOWN. 'What and if you do?' SIR TOBY. 'Shall I bid him go, and spare not?' CLOWN. 'O, no, no, no, no, you dare not.' SIR TOBY. Out o' tune, sir? ye lie. Art any more than a steward? Dost thou think, because thou art virtuous, there shall be no more cakes and ale? CLOWN. Yes, by Saint Anne, and ginger shall be hot i' th' mouth too. SIR TOBY. Th 'rt i' th' right. Go, sir, rub your chain with crumbs. A stoup of wine, Maria! MALVOLIO. Mistress Mary, if you priz'd my lady's favour at any thing more than contempt, you would not give means for this uncivil rule. She shall know of it, by this hand. [Exit.] MARIA. Go shake your ears. SIR ANDREW. 'T were as good a deed as to drink when a man's a-hungry, to challenge him the field, and then to break promise with him and make a fool of him. SIR TOBY. Do't, knight: I'll write thee a challenge; or I'll deliver thy indignation to him by word of mouth. MARIA. Sweet Sir Toby, be patient for to-night; since the youth of the count's was to-day with my lady, she is much out of quiet. For Monsieur Malvolio, let me alone with him; if I do not gull him into a nayword, and make him a common recreation, do not think I have wit enough to lie straight in my bed: I know I can do it. SIR TOBY. Possess us, possess us; tell us something of him. MARIA. Marry, sir, sometimes he is a kind of puritan. SIR ANDREW. O, if I thought that, I'd beat him like a dog! SIR TOBY. What, for being a puritan? thy exquisite reason, dear knight? SIR ANDREW. I have no exquisite reason for 't, but I have reason good enough. MARIA. The devil a puritan that he is, or any thing constantly, but a time-pleaser; an affection'd ass, that cons state without book, and utters it by great swarths; the best persuaded of himself, so cramm'd, as he thinks, with excellencies, that it is his grounds of faith that all that look on him love him; and on that vice in him will my revenge find notable cause to work. SIR TOBY. What wilt thou do? MARIA. I will drop in his way some obscure epistles of love; wherein, by the colour of his beard, the shape of his leg, the manner of his gait, the expressure of his eye, forehead, and complexion, he shall find himself most feelingly personated. I can write very like my lady, your niece; on a forgotten matter we can hardly make distinction of our hands. SIR TOBY. Excellent! I smell a device. SIR ANDREW. I have 't in my nose too. SIR TOBY. He shall think, by the letters that thou wilt drop, that they come from my niece, and that she's in love with him. MARIA. My purpose is, indeed, a horse of that colour. SIR ANDREW. And your horse now would make him an ass. MARIA. Ass, I doubt not. SIR ANDREW. O, 't will be admirable! MARIA. Sport royal, I warrant you; I know my physic will work with him. I will plant you two, and let the fool make a third, where he shall find the letter; observe his construction of it. For this night, to bed, and dream on the event. Farewell. [Exit.] SIR TOBY. Good night, Penthesilea. SIR ANDREW. Before me, she's a good wench. SIR TOBY. She's a beagle, true-bred, and one that adores me. What o' that? SIR ANDREW. I was ador'd once too. SIR TOBY. Let's to bed, knight. Thou hadst need send for more money. SIR ANDREW. If I cannot recover your niece, I am a foul way out. SIR TOBY. Send for money, knight; if thou hast her not i' th' end, call me cut. SIR ANDREW. If I do not, never trust me; take it how you will. SIR TOBY. Come, come, I'll go burn some sack; 't is too late to go to bed now. Come, knight; come, knight. [Exeunt.] SCENE IV. The DUKE'S palace [Enter DUKE, VIOLA, CURIO, and others.] DUKE. Give me some music. Now, good morrow, friends. Now, good Cesario, but that piece of song, That old and antique song we heard last night; Methought it did relieve my passion much, More than light airs and recollected terms Of these most brisk and giddy-paced times. Come, but one verse. CURIO. He is not here, so please your lordship, that should sing it. DUKE. Who was it? CURIO. Feste, the jester, my lord; a fool that the lady Olivia's father took much delight in. He is about the house. DUKE. Go seek him out, and play the tune the while. [Exit CURIO. Music plays] Come hither, boy. If ever thou shalt love, In the sweet pangs of it remember me; For such as I am all true lovers are, Unstaid and skittish in all motions else, Save in the constant image of the creature That is belov'd. How dost thou like this tune? VIOLA. It gives a very echo to the seat Where Love is thron'd. DUKE. Thou dost speak masterly: My life upon 't, young though thou art, thine eye Hath stay'd upon some favour that it loves; Hath it not, boy? VIOLA. A little, by your favour. DUKE. What kind of woman is 't? VIOLA. Of your complexion. DUKE. She is not worth thee, then. What years, i' faith? VIOLA. About your years, my lord. DUKE. Too old, by heaven! let still the woman take An elder than herself; so wears she to him, So sways she level in her husband's heart: For, boy, however we do praise ourselves, Our fancies are more giddy and unfirm, More longing, wavering, sooner lost and worn, Than women's are. VIOLA. I think it well, my lord. DUKE. Then let thy love be younger than thyself, Or thy affection cannot hold the bent; For women are as roses, whose fair flower, Being once display'd, doth fall that very hour. VIOLA. And so they are: alas, that they are so; To die, even when they to perfection grow! [Re-enter CURIO and CLOWN.] DUKE. O, fellow, come, the song we had last night. Mark it, Cesario, it is old and plain; The spinsters and the knitters in the sun, And the free maids that weave their thread with bones, Do use to chant it: it is silly sooth, And dallies with the innocence of love, Like the old age. CLOWN. Are you ready, sir? DUKE. Ay; prithee, sing. [Music] SONG CLOWN. Come away, come away, death, And in sad cypress let me be laid; Fly away, fly away, breath; I am slain by a fair cruel maid. My shroud of white, stuck all with yew, O, prepare it! My part of death, no one so true Did share it. Not a flower, not a flower sweet, On my black coffin let there be strown; Not a friend, not a friend greet My poor corpse, where my bones shall be thrown. A thousand thousand sighs to save, Lay me, O, where Sad true lover never find my grave, To weep there! DUKE. There 's for thy pains. CLOWN. No pains, sir; I take pleasure in singing, sir. DUKE. I 'll pay thy pleasure, then. CLOWN. Truly, sir, and pleasure will be paid one time or another. DUKE. Give me now leave to leave thee. CLOWN. Now the melancholy god protect thee; and the tailor make thy doublet of changeable taffeta, for thy mind is a very opal. I would have men of such constancy put to sea, that their business might be every thing, and their intent every where; for that 's it that always makes a good voyage of nothing. Farewell. [Exit.] DUKE. Let all the rest give place. [CURIO and ATTENDANTS retire.] Once more, Cesario, Get thee to yond same sovereign cruelty. Tell her my love, more noble than the world, Prizes not quantity of dirty lands; The parts that fortune hath bestow'd upon her, Tell her, I hold as giddily as fortune; But 't is that miracle and queen of gems That Nature pranks her in attracts my soul. VIOLA. But if she cannot love you, sir? DUKE. I cannot be so answer'd. VIOLA. Sooth, but you must. Say that some lady, as perhaps there is, Hath for your love as great a pang of heart As you have for Olivia: you cannot love her; You tell her so; must she not, then, be answer'd? DUKE. There is no woman's sides Can bide the beating of so strong a passion As love doth give my heart; no woman's heart So big to hold so much; they lack retention. Alas, their love may be call'd appetite - No motion of the liver, but the palate - That suffer surfeit, cloyment, and revolt; But mine is all as hungry as the sea, And can digest as much. Make no compare Between that love a woman can bear me And that I owe Olivia. VIOLA. Ay, but I know - DUKE. What dost thou know? VIOLA. Too well what love women to men may owe; In faith, they are as true of heart as we. My father had a daughter lov'd a man, As it might be, perhaps, were I a woman, I should your lordship. DUKE. And what's her history? VIOLA. A blank, my lord. She never told her love, But let concealment, like a worm i' th' bud, Feed on her damask cheek; she pin'd in thought, And with a green and yellow melancholy, She sat, like patience on a monument, Smiling at grief. Was not this love indeed? We men may say more, swear more; but indeed Our shows are more than will; for still we prove Much in our vows, but little in our love. DUKE. But died thy sister of her love, my boy? VIOLA. I am all the daughters of my father's house, And all the brothers too; and yet I know not. Sir, shall I to this lady? DUKE. Ay, that's the theme. To her in haste; give her this jewel; say, My love can give no place, bide no denay. [Exeunt.] SCENE V. OLIVIA'S garden. [Enter SIR TOBY, SIR ANDREW, and FABIAN.] SIR TOBY. Come thy ways, Signior Fabian. FABIAN. Nay, I'll come: if I lose a scruple of this sport, let me be boil'd to death with melancholy. SIR TOBY. Wouldst thou not be glad to have the niggardly rascally sheep-biter come by some notable shame? FABIAN. I would exult, man; you know he brought me out o' favour with my lady about a bear-baiting here. SIR TOBY. To anger him, we'll have the bear again; and we will fool him black and blue: shall we not, Sir Andrew? SIR ANDREW. And we do not, it is pity of our lives. [Enter MARIA.] SIR TOBY. Here comes the little villain. How now, my metal of India! MARIA. Get ye all three into the box-tree; Malvolio's coming down this walk. He has been yonder i' the sun practising behaviour to his own shadow this half hour. Observe him, for the love of mockery; for I know this letter will make a contemplative idiot of him. Close, in the name of jesting! Lie thou there [throws down a letter], for here comes the trout that must be caught with tickling. [Exit.] [Enter MALVOLIO.] MALVOLIO. 'T is but fortune; all is fortune. Maria once told me she did affect me; and I have heard herself come thus near, that, should she fancy, it should be one of my complexion. Besides, she uses me with a more exalted respect than any one else that follows her. What should I think on 't? SIR TOBY. Here 's an overweening rogue! FABIAN. O, peace! Contemplation makes a rare turkey-cock of him; how he jets under his advanc'd plumes! SIR ANDREW. 'Slight, I could so beat the rogue! SIR TOBY. Peace, I say. MALVOLIO. To be Count Malvolio! SIR TOBY. Ah, rogue! SIR ANDREW. Pistol him, pistol him. SIR TOBY. Peace, peace! MALVOLIO. There is example for't: the lady of the Strachy married the yeoman of the wardrobe. SIR ANDREW. Fie on him, Jezebel! FABIAN. O, peace! now he's deeply in; look how imagination blows him. MALVOLIO. Having been three months married to her, sitting in my state, - SIR TOBY. O, for a stone-bow, to hit him in the eye! MALVOLIO. Calling my officers about me, in my branch'd velvet gown; having come from a day-bed, where I have left Olivia sleeping, - SIR TOBY. Fire and brimstone! FABIAN. O, peace, peace! MALVOLIO. And then to have the humour of state; and, after a demure travel of regard, telling them I know my place, as I would they should do theirs, to ask for my kinsman Toby, - SIR TOBY. Bolts and shackles! FABIAN. O, peace, peace, peace! now, now. MALVOLIO. Seven of my people, with an obedient start, make out for him: I frown the while; and perchance wind up my watch, or play with my - some rich jewel. Toby approaches; curtsies there to me, - SIR TOBY. Shall this fellow live? FABIAN. Though our silence be drawn from us with cars, yet peace. MALVOLIO. I extend my hand to him thus, quenching my familiar smile with an austere regard of control, - SIR TOBY. And does not Toby take you a blow o' the lips, then? MALVOLIO. Saying, 'Cousin Toby, my fortunes having cast me on your niece, give me this prerogative of speech,' - SIR TOBY. What, what? MALVOLIO. 'You must amend your drunkenness.' - SIR TOBY. Out, scab! FABIAN. Nay, patience, or we break the sinews of our plot. MALVOLIO. 'Besides, you waste the treasure of your time with a foolish knight,' - SIR ANDREW. That's me, I warrant you. MALVOLIO. 'One Sir Andrew.' SIR ANDREW. I knew 't was I; for many do call me fool. MALVOLIO. What employment have we here? [Taking up the letter.] FABIAN. Now is the woodcock near the gin. SIR TOBY. O, peace! and the spirit of humours intimate reading aloud to him! MALVOLIO. By my life, this is my lady's hand: these be her very C's, her U's, and her T's; and thus makes she her great P's. It is, in contempt of question, her hand. SIR ANDREW. Her C's, her U's, and her T's; why that? MALVOLIO. [Reads] To the unknown beloved, this, and my good wishes: - her very phrases! By your leave, wax. Soft! and the impressure her Lucrece, with which she uses to seal; 't is my lady. To whom should this be? FABIAN. This wins him, liver and all. MALVOLIO. [Reads] Jove knows I love; But who? Lips, do not move; No man must know. 'No man must know.' What follows? the numbers alter'd! 'No man must know.' If this should be thee, Malvolio? SIR TOBY. Marry, hang thee, brock! MALVOLIO. [Reads] I may command where I adore; But silence, like a Lucrece knife, With bloodless stroke my heart doth gore: M, O, A, I, doth sway my life. FABIAN. A fustian riddle! SIR TOBY. Excellent wench, say I. MALVOLIO. 'M, O, A, I, doth sway my life.' Nay, but first, let me see, let me see, let me see. FABIAN. What dish o' poison has she dress'd him! SIR TOBY. And with what wing the staniel checks at it! MALVOLIO. 'I may command where I adore.' Why, she may command me; I serve her; she is my lady. Why, this is evident to any formal capacity; there is no obstruction in this: and the end, - what should that alphabetical position portend? if I could make that resemble something in me! - Softly! M, O, A, I, - SIR TOBY. O, ay, make up that; he is now at a cold scent. FABIAN. Sowter will cry upon 't for all this, though it be as rank as a fox. MALVOLIO. M, - Malvolio; M, - why, that begins my name. FABIAN. Did not I say he would work it out? the cur is excellent at faults. MALVOLIO. M, - but then there is no consonancy in the sequel; that suffers under probation: A should follow, but O does. FABIAN. And O shall end, I hope. SIR TOBY. Ay, or I 'll cudgel him, and make him cry O! MALVOLIO. And then I comes behind. FABIAN. Ay, an you had any eye behind you, you might see more detraction at your heels than fortunes before you. MALVOLIO. M, O, A, I; this simulation is not as the former; and yet, to crush this a little, it would bow to me, for every one of these letters are in my name. Soft! here follows prose. - [Reads] 'If this fall into thy hand, revolve. In my stars I am above thee; but be not afraid of greatness: some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon 'em. Thy Fates open their hands; let thy blood and spirit embrace them; and, to inure thyself to what thou art like to be, cast thy humble slough and appear fresh. Be opposite with a kinsman, surly with servants; let thy tongue tang arguments of state; put thyself into the trick of singularity: she thus advises thee that sighs for thee. Remember who commended thy yellow stockings, and wish'd to see thee ever cross-garter'd. I say, remember. Go to, thou art made, if thou desir'st to be so; if not, let me see thee a steward still, the fellow of servants, and not worthy to touch Fortune's fingers. Farewell. She that would alter services with thee, THE FORTUNATE-UNHAPPY. Daylight and champain discovers not more; this is open. I will be proud, I will read politic authors, I will baffle Sir Toby, I will wash off gross acquaintance, I will be point-devise the very man. I do not now fool myself, to let imagination jade me; for every reason excites to this, that my lady loves me. She did commend my yellow stockings of late, she did praise my leg being cross-garter'd; and in this she manifests herself to my love, and with a kind of injunction drives me to these habits of her liking. I thank my stars, I am happy. I will be strange, stout, in yellow stockings, and cross-garter'd, even with the swiftness of putting on. Jove and my stars be praised! Here is yet a postscript. [Reads] Thou canst not choose but know who I am. If thou entertain'st my love, let it appear in thy smiling; thy smiles become thee well; therefore in my presence still smile, dear my sweet, I prithee. Jove, I thank thee. I will smile; I will do everything that thou wilt have me. [Exit.] FABIAN. I will not give my part of this sport for a pension of thousands to be paid from the Sophy. SIR TOBY. I could marry this wench for this device. SIR ANDREW. So could I too. SIR TOBY. And ask no other dowry with her but such another jest. SIR ANDREW. Nor I neither. FABIAN. Here comes my noble gull-catcher. [Re-enter MARIA.] SIR TOBY. Wilt thou set thy foot o' my neck? SIR ANDREW. Or o' mine either? SIR TOBY. Shall I play my freedom at tray-trip, and become thy bond-slave? SIR ANDREW. I' faith, or I either? SIR TOBY. Why, thou hast put him in such a dream, that when the image of it leaves him he must run mad. MARIA. Nay, but say true; does it work upon him? SIR TOBY. Like aqua-vitae with a midwife. MARIA. If you will then see the fruits of the sport, mark his first approach before my lady. He will come to her in yellow stockings, and 't is a colour she abhors; and cross-garter'd, a fashion she detests; and he will smile upon her, which will now be so unsuitable to her disposition, being addicted to a melancholy as she is, that it cannot but turn him into a notable contempt. If you will see it, follow me. SIR TOBY. To the gates of Tartar, thou most excellent devil of wit! SIR ANDREW. I'll make one too. [Exeunt.] ACT III. SCENE I. OLIVIA'S garden. [Enter VIOLA, and CLOWN with a tabor.] VIOLA. Save thee, friend, and thy music! dost thou live by thy tabor? CLOWN. No, sir, I live by the church. VIOLA. Art thou a churchman? CLOWN. No such matter, sir: I do live by the church; for I do live at my house, and my house doth stand by the church. VIOLA. So thou mayst say, the king lies by a beggar, if a beggar dwell near him; or the church stands by thy tabor, if thy tabor stand by the church. CLOWN. You have said, sir. To see this age! A sentence is but a cheveril glove to a good wit; how quickly the wrong side may be turn'd outward! VIOLA. Nay, that's certain; they that dally nicely with words may quickly make them wanton. CLOWN. I would, therefore, my sister had had no name, sir. VIOLA. Why, man? CLOWN. Why, sir, her name's a word; and to dally with that word might make my sister wanton. But, indeed, words are very rascals since bonds disgrac'd them. VIOLA. Thy reason, man? CLOWN. Troth, sir, I can yield you none without words; and words are grown so false, I am loth to prove reason with them. VIOLA. I warrant thou art a merry fellow, and car'st for nothing. CLOWN. Not so, sir; I do care for something; but in my conscience, sir, I do not care for you: if that be to care for nothing, sir, I would it would make you invisible. VIOLA. Art not thou the Lady Olivia's fool? CLOWN. No, indeed, sir; the Lady Olivia has no folly: she will keep no fool, sir, till she be married; and fools are as like husbands as pilchards are to herrings, the husband's the bigger. I am, indeed, not her fool, but her corrupter of words. VIOLA. I saw thee late at the Count Orsino's. CLOWN. Foolery, sir, does walk about the orb like the sun, it shines everywhere. I would be sorry, sir, but the fool should be as oft with your master as with my mistress. I think I saw your wisdom there. VIOLA. Nay, and thou pass upon me, I'll no more with thee. Hold, there's expenses for thee. CLOWN. Now Jove, in his next commodity of hair, send thee a beard! VIOLA. By my troth, I'll tell thee, I am almost sick for one; [Aside] though I would not have it grow on my chin. Is thy lady within? CLOWN. Would not a pair of these have bred, sir? VIOLA. Yes, being kept together and put to use. CLOWN. I would play Lord Pandarus of Phrygia, sir, to bring a Cressida to this Troilus. VIOLA. I understand you, sir; 't is well begg'd. CLOWN. The matter, I hope, is not great, sir, begging but a beggar. Cressida was a beggar. My lady is within, sir. I will construe to them whence you come; who you are and what you would are out of my welkin, - I might say 'element,' but the word is over-worn. [Exit.] VIOLA. This fellow is wise enough to play the fool; And to do that well craves a kind of wit: He must observe their mood on whom he jests, The quality of persons, and the time; And, like the haggard, check at every feather That comes before his eye. This is a practice As full of labour as a wise man's art: For folly that he wisely shows is fit; But wise men, folly-fall'n, quite taint their wit. [Enter SIR TOBY and SIR ANDREW.] SIR TOBY. Save you, gentleman! VIOLA. And you, sir. SIR ANDREW. Dieu vous garde, monsieur. VIOLA. Et vous aussi; votre serviteur. SIR ANDREW. I hope, sir, you are; and I am yours. SIR TOBY. Will you encounter the house? my niece is desirous you should enter, if your trade be to her. VIOLA. I am bound to your niece, sir; I mean, she is the list of my voyage. SIR TOBY. Taste your legs, sir; put them to motion. VIOLA. My legs do better understand me, sir, than I understand what you mean by bidding me taste my legs. SIR TOBY. I mean, to go, sir, to enter. VIOLA. I will answer you with gait and entrance. But we are prevented. [Enter OLIVIA and MARIA.] Most excellent accomplish'd lady, the heavens rain odours on you! SIR ANDREW. That youth's a rare courtier. 'Rain odours'; well. VIOLA. My matter hath no voice, lady, but to your own most pregnant and vouchsafed ear. SIR ANDREW. 'Odours,' 'pregnant,' and 'vouchsafed': I'll get 'em all three all ready. OLIVIA. Let the garden door be shut, and leave me to my hearing. [Exeunt SIR TOBY, SIR ANDREW, and MARIA.] Give me your hand, sir. VIOLA. My duty, madam, and most humble service. OLIVIA. What is your name? VIOLA. Cesario is your servant's name, fair princess. OLIVIA. My servant, sir! 'T was never merry world Since lowly feigning was call'd compliment; You're servant to the Count Orsino, youth. VIOLA. And he is yours, and his must needs be yours; Your servant's servant is your servant, madam. OLIVIA. For him, I think not on him; for his thoughts, Would they were blanks, rather than fill'd with me! VIOLA. Madam, I come to whet your gentle thoughts On his behalf. OLIVIA. O, by your leave, I pray you, I bade you never speak again of him; But, would you undertake another suit, I had rather hear you to solicit that Than music from the spheres. VIOLA. Dear lady, - OLIVIA. Give me leave, beseech you. I did send, After the last enchantment you did here, A ring in chase of you; so did I abuse Myself, my servant, and, I fear me, you. Under your hard construction must I sit, To force that on you, in a shameful cunning, Which you knew none of yours; what might you think? Have you not set mine honour at the stake, And baited it with all th' unmuzzled thoughts That tyrannous heart can think? To one of your receiving Enough is shown. A cypress, not a bosom, Hides my heart. So, let me hear you speak. VIOLA. I pity you. OLIVIA. That's a degree to love. VIOLA. No, not a grize; for 't is a vulgar proof, That very oft we pity enemies. OLIVIA. Why, then methinks 't is time to smile again. O world, how apt the poor are to be proud! If one should be a prey, how much the better To fall before the lion than the wolf! [Clock strikes] The clock upbraids me with the waste of time. Be not afraid, good youth, I will not have you; And yet, when wit and youth is come to harvest, Your wife is like to reap a proper man. There lies your way, due west. VIOLA. Then westward-ho! Grace and good disposition Attend your ladyship! You'll nothing, madam, to my lord by me? OLIVIA. Stay: I prithee, tell me what thou think'st of me. VIOLA. That you do think you are not what you are. OLIVIA. If I think so, I think the same of you. VIOLA. Then think you right; I am not what I am. OLIVIA. I would you were as I would have you be! VIOLA. Would it be better, madam, than I am? I wish it might, for now I am your fool. OLIVIA. O, what a deal of scorn looks beautiful In the contempt and anger of his lip! A murd'rous guilt shows not itself more soon Than love that would seem hid; love's night is noon. Cesario, by the roses of the spring, By maidhood, honour, truth, and every thing, I love thee so, that, maugre all thy pride, Nor wit nor reason can my passion hide. Do not extort thy reasons from this clause, For that I woo, thou therefore hast no cause; But rather reason thus with reason fetter, Love sought is good, but given unsought is better. VIOLA. By innocence I swear, and by my youth, I have one heart, one bosom, and one truth, And that no woman has; nor never none Shall mistress be of it, save I alone. And so adieu, good madam; never more Will I my master's tears to you deplore. OLIVIA. Yet come again; for thou perhaps mayst move That heart, which now abhors, to like his love. [Exeunt.] SCENE II. OLIVIA'S house [Enter SIR TOBY, SIR ANDREW and FABIAN.] SIR ANDREW. No, faith, I'll not stay a jot longer. SIR TOBY. Thy reason, dear venom, give thy reason. FABIAN. You must needs yield your reason, Sir Andrew. SIR ANDREW. Marry, I saw your niece do more favours to the count's serving-man than ever she bestow'd upon me; I saw 't i' th' orchard. SIR TOBY. Did she see thee the while, old boy? tell me that. SIR ANDREW. As plain as I see you now. FABIAN. This was a great argument of love in her toward you. SIR ANDREW. 'Slight, will you make an ass o' me? FABIAN. I will prove it legitimate, sir, upon the oaths of judgment and reason. SIR TOBY. And they have been grand-jurymen since before Noah was a sailor. FABIAN. She did show favour to the youth in your sight only to exasperate you, to awake your dormouse valour, to put fire in your heart, and brimstone in your liver. You should then have accosted her; and with some excellent jests, fire-new from the mint, you should have bang'd the youth into dumbness. This was look'd for at your hand, and this was balk'd: the double gilt of this opportunity you let time wash off, and you are now sail'd into the north of my lady's opinion; where you will hang like an icicle on Dutchman's beard, unless you do redeem it by some laudable attempt either of valour or policy. SIR ANDREW. And't be any way, it must be with valour; for policy I hate: I had as lief be a Brownist as a politician. SIR TOBY. Why, then, build me thy fortunes upon the basis of valour. Challenge me the count's youth to fight with him; hurt him in eleven places: my niece shall take note of it; and assure thyself, there is no love-broker in the world can more prevail in man's commendation with woman than report of valour. FABIAN. There is no way but this, Sir Andrew. SIR ANDREW. Will either of you bear me a challenge to him? SIR TOBY. Go, write it in a martial hand; be curst and brief; it is no matter how witty, so it be eloquent and full of invention; taunt him with the license of ink; if thou thou'st him some thrice, it shall not be amiss; and as many lies as will lie in thy sheet of paper, although the sheet were big enough for the bed of Ware in England, set 'em down: go, about it. Let there be gall enough in thy ink; though thou write with a goose-pen, no matter: about it. SIR ANDREW. Where shall I find you? SIR TOBY. We'll call thee at the cubiculo. Go. [Exit SIR ANDREW.] FABIAN. This is a dear manakin to you, Sir Toby. SIR TOBY. I have been dear to him, lad, some two thousand strong, or so. FABIAN. We shall have a rare letter from him; but you'll not deliver 't? SIR TOBY. Never trust me, then; and by all means stir on the youth to an answer. I think oxen and wain-ropes cannot hale them together. For Andrew, if he were open'd, and you find so much blood in his liver as will clog the foot of a flea, I'll eat the rest of th' anatomy. FABIAN. And his opposite, the youth, bears in his visage no great presage of cruelty. SIR TOBY. Look where the youngest wren of nine comes. [Enter MARIA.] MARIA. If you desire the spleen, and will laugh yourselves into stitches, follow me. Yond gull Malvolio is turn'd heathen, a very renegado; for there is no Christian, that means to be sav'd by believing rightly, can ever believe such impossible passages of grossness. He's in yellow stockings. SIR TOBY. And cross-garter'd? MARIA. Most villainously; like a pedant that keeps a school i' th' church. I have dogg'd him, like his murderer. He does obey every point of the letter that I dropp'd to betray him; he does smile his face into more lines than is in the new map, with the augmentation of the Indies: you have not seen such a thing as 't is. I can hardly forbear hurling things at him. I know my lady will strike him; if she do, he'll smile, and take 't for a great favour. SIR TOBY. Come, bring us, bring us where he is. [Exeunt.] SCENE III. A street [Enter SEBASTIAN and ANTONIO.] SEBASTIAN. I would not by my will have troubled you; But, since you make your pleasure of your pains, I will no further chide you. ANTONIO. I could not stay behind you: my desire, More sharp than filed steel, did spur me forth; And not all love to see you, though so much As might have drawn one to a longer voyage, But jealousy what might befall your travel, Being skilless in these parts; which to a stranger, Unguided and unfriended, often prove Rough and unhospitable. My willing love, The rather by these arguments of fear, Set forth in your pursuit. SEBASTIAN. My kind Antonio, I can no other answer make but thanks, And thanks, and ever thanks; too oft good turns Are shuffl'd off with such uncurrent pay: But, were my worth as is my conscience firm, You should find better dealing. What's to do? Shall we go see the reliques of this town? ANTONIO. To-morrow, sir; best first go see your lodging. SEBASTIAN. I am not weary, and 't is long to night; I pray you, let us satisfy our eyes With the memorials and the things of fame That do renown this city. ANTONIO. Would you'd pardon me; I do not without danger walk these streets. Once, in a sea-fight, 'gainst the count his galleys I did some service; of such note indeed, That, were I ta'en here, it would scarce be answer'd. SEBASTIAN. Belike you slew great number of his people. ANTONIO. Th' offence is not of such a bloody nature; Albeit the quality of the time and quarrel Might well have given us bloody argument. It might have since been answer'd in repaying What we took from them; which, for traffic's sake, Most of our city did: only myself stood out; For which, if I be lapsed in this place, I shall pay dear. SEBASTIAN. Do not then walk too open. ANTONIO. It doth not fit me. Hold, sir, here's my purse. In the south suburbs, at the Elephant, Is best to lodge. I will bespeak our diet, Whiles you beguile the time and feed your knowledge With viewing of the town; there shall you have me. SEBASTIAN. Why I your purse? ANTONIO. Haply your eye shall light upon some toy You have desire to purchase; and your store, I think, is not for idle markets, sir. SEBASTIAN. I'll be your purse-bearer, and leave you For an hour. ANTONIO. To th' Elephant. SEBASTIAN. I do remember. [Exeunt.] SCENE IV. OLIVIA'S garden [Enter OLIVIA and MARIA.] OLIVIA. I have sent after him; he says he'll come. How shall I feast him? what bestow of him? For youth is bought more oft than begg'd or borrow'd. I speak too loud. Where's Malvolio? He is sad and civil, And suits well for a servant with my fortunes. Where is Malvolio? MARIA. He's coming, madam, but in very strange manner. He is, sure, possess'd, madam. OLIVIA. Why, what's the matter? does he rave? MARIA. No, madam, he does nothing but smile. Your ladyship were best to have some guard about you, if he come; for, sure, the man is tainted in's wits. OLIVIA. Go call him hither. [Exit MARIA.] I am as mad as he, If sad and merry madness equal be. [Re-enter MARIA, with MALVOLIO.] How now Malvolio! MALVOLIO. Sweet lady, ho, ho. OLIVIA. Smil'st thou? I sent for thee upon a sad occasion. MALVOLIO. Sad, lady! I could be sad; this does make some obstruction in the blood, this cross-gartering; but what of that? if it please the eye of one, it is with me as the very true sonnet is, 'Please one, and please all.' OLIVIA. Why, how dost thou, man? what is the matter with thee? MALVOLIO. Not black in my mind, though yellow in my legs. It did come to his hands, and commands shall be executed; I think we do know the sweet Roman hand. OLIVIA. Wilt thou go to bed, Malvolio? MALVOLIO. To bed! ay, sweet-heart, and I'll come to thee. OLIVIA. God comfort thee! Why dost thou smile so and kiss thy hand so oft? MARIA. How do you, Malvolio? MALVOLIO. At your request! yes; nightingales answer daws. MARIA. Why appear you with this ridiculous boldness before my lady? MALVOLIO. 'Be not afraid of greatness'; 'twas well writ. OLIVIA. What mean'st thou by that, Malvolio? MALVOLIO. 'Some are born great,' - OLIVIA. Ha! MALVOLIO. 'Some achieve greatness,' - OLIVIA. What say'st thou? MALVOLIO. 'And some have greatness thrust upon them.' OLIVIA. Heaven restore thee! MALVOLIO. 'Remember who commended thy yellow stockings,' - OLIVIA. Thy yellow stockings! MALVOLIO. 'And wish'd to see thee cross-garter'd.' OLIVIA. Cross-garter'd! MALVOLIO. 'Go to, thou art made, if thou desir'st to be so;' - OLIVIA. Am I made? MALVOLIO. 'If not, let me see thee a servant still.' OLIVIA. Why, this is very midsummer madness. [Enter SERVANT.] SERVANT. Madam, the young gentleman of the Count Orsino's is return'd: I could hardly entreat him back: he attends your ladyship's pleasure. OLIVIA. I'll come to him. [Exit SERVANT] Good Maria, let this fellow be look'd to. Where's my cousin Toby? Let some of my people have a special care of him; I would not have him miscarry for the half of my dowry. [Exeunt OLIVIA and MARIA.] MALVOLIO. O, ho! do you come near me now? no worse man than Sir Toby to look to me! This concurs directly with the letter: she sends him on purpose, that I may appear stubborn to him; for she incites me to that in the letter. 'Cast thy humble slough,' says she; 'be opposite with kinsman, surly with servants; let thy tongue tang with arguments of state; put thyself into the trick of singularity'; and, consequently, sets down the manner how; as, a sad face, a reverend carriage, a slow tongue, in the habit of some sir of note, and so forth. I have lim'd her; but it is Jove's doing, and Jove make me thankful! And when she went away now, 'Let this fellow be look'd to'; fellow! not Malvolio, nor after my degree, but fellow. Why, every thing adheres together, that no dram of a scruple, no scruple of a scruple, no obstacle, no incredulous or unsafe circumstance, - what can be said? Nothing that can be can come between me and the full prospect of my hopes. Well, Jove, not I, is the doer of this, and he is to be thank'd. [Re-enter MARIA, with SIR TOBY and FABIAN.] SIR TOBY. Which way is he, in the name of sanctity? If all the devils of hell be drawn in little, and Legion himself possessed him, yet I 'll speak to him. FABIAN. Here he is, here he is. How is 't with you, sir? how is 't with you, man? MALVOLIO. Go off; I discard you: let me enjoy my private; go off. MARIA. Lo, how hollow the fiend speaks within him! did not I tell you? Sir Toby, my lady prays you to have a care of him. MALVOLIO. Ah, ha! does she so? SIR TOBY. Go to, go to; peace, peace; we must deal gently with him: let me alone. How do you, Malvolio? how is 't with you? What, man! defy the devil; consider, he 's an enemy to mankind. MALVOLIO. Do you know what you say? MARIA. La you, and you speak ill of the devil, how he takes it at heart! Pray God, he be not bewitch'd! My lady would not lose him for more than I 'll say. MALVOLIO. How now, mistress! MARIA. O Lord! SIR TOBY. Prithee, hold thy peace; this is not the way: do you not see you move him? let me alone with him. FABIAN. No way but gentleness; gently, gently: the fiend is rough, and will not be roughly us'd. SIR TOBY. Why, how now, my bawcock! how dost thou, chuck? MALVOLIO. Sir! SIR TOBY. Ay, Biddy, come with me. What, man! 't is not for gravity to play at cherry-pit with Satan. Hang him, foul collier! MARIA. Get him to say his prayers; good Sir Toby, get him to pray. MALVOLIO. My prayers, minx! MARIA. No, I warrant you, he will not hear of godliness. MALVOLIO. Go, hang yourselves all! you are idle shallow things. I am not of your element; you shall know more hereafter. [Exit.] SIR TOBY. Is 't possible? FABIAN. If this were play'd upon a stage now, I could condemn it as an improbable fiction. SIR TOBY. His very genius hath taken the infection of the device, man. MARIA. Nay, pursue him now, lest the device take air and taint. FABIAN. Why, we shall make him mad indeed. MARIA. The house will be the quieter. SIR TOBY. Come, we 'll have him in a dark room and bound. My niece is already in the belief that he 's mad: we may carry it thus, for our pleasure and his penance, till our very pastime, tired out of breath, prompt us to have mercy on him; at which time we will bring the device to the bar, and crown thee for a finder of madmen. But see, but see. [Enter SIR ANDREW.] FABIAN. More matter for a May morning. SIR ANDREW. Here 's the challenge, read it; I warrant there 's vinegar and pepper in 't. FABIAN. Is 't so saucy? SIR ANDREW. Ay, is 't, I warrant him; do but read. SIR TOBY. Give me. [Reads] Youth, whatsoever thou art, thou art but a scurvy fellow. FABIAN. Good and valiant. SIR TOBY. [Reads] Wonder not, nor admire not in thy mind, why I do call thee so, for I will show thee no reason for 't. FABIAN. A good note; that keeps you from the blow of the law. SIR TOBY. [Reads] Thou com'st to the lady Olivia, and in my sight she uses thee kindly: but thou liest in thy throat; that is not the matter I challenge thee for. FABIAN. Very brief, and to exceeding good sense - less. SIR TOBY. [Reads] I will waylay thee going home; where if it be thy chance to kill me, - FABIAN. Good. SIR TOBY. [Reads.] Thou kill 'st me like a rogue and a villain. FABIAN. Still you keep o' th' windy side of the law; good. SIR TOBY. [Reads] Fare thee well; and God have mercy upon one of our souls! He may have mercy upon mine; but my hope is better, and so look to thyself. Thy friend, as thou usest him, and thy sworn enemy, ANDREW AGUECHEEK. If this letter move him not, his legs cannot; I'll give 't him. MARIA. You may have very fit occasion for 't; he is now in some commerce with my lady, and will by and by depart. SIR TOBY. Go, Sir Andrew; scout me for him at the corner of the orchard, like a bum-baily. So soon as ever thou see'st him, draw; and as thou drawest, swear horrible; for it comes to pass oft, that a terrible oath, with a swaggering accent sharply twang'd off, gives manhood more approbation than ever proof itself would have earn'd him. Away! SIR ANDREW. Nay, let me alone for swearing. [Exit.] SIR TOBY. Now will not I deliver his letter; for the behaviour of the young gentleman gives him out to be of good capacity and breeding; his employment between his lord and my niece confirms no less: therefore this letter, being so excellently ignorant, will breed no terror in the youth; he will find it comes from a clodpole. But, sir, I will deliver his challenge by word of mouth; set upon Aguecheek a notable report of valour; and drive the gentleman, as I know his youth will aptly receive it, into a most hideous opinion of his rage, skill, fury, and impetuosity. This will so fright them both, that they will kill one another by the look, like cockatrices. [Re-enter OLIVIA with VIOLA.] FABIAN. Here he comes with your niece; give them way till he take leave, and presently after him. SIR TOBY. I will meditate the while upon some horrid message for a challenge. [Exeunt SIR TOBY, FABIAN, and MARIA.] OLIVIA. I have said too much unto a heart of stone, And laid mine honour too unchary out. There 's something in me that reproves my fault; But such a headstrong potent fault it is, That it but mocks reproof. VIOLA. With the same haviour that your passion bears, Goes on my master's grief. OLIVIA. Here, wear this jewel for me, 't is my picture: Refuse it not; it hath no tongue to vex you: And I beseech you come again to-morrow. What shall you ask of me that I 'll deny, That honour sav'd may upon asking give? VIOLA. Nothing but this, - your true love for my master. OLIVIA. How with mine honour may I give him that Which I have given to you? VIOLA. I will acquit you. OLIVIA. Well, come again to-morrow; fare thee well. A fiend like thee might bear my soul to hell. [Exit.] [Re-enter SIR TOBY and FABIAN.] SIR TOBY. Gentleman, God save thee! VIOLA. And you, sir. SIR TOBY. That defence thou hast, betake thee to 't. Of what nature the wrongs are thou hast done him, I know not; but thy intercepter, full of despite, bloody as the hunter, attends thee at the orchard-end. Dismount thy tuck, be yare in thy preparation; for thy assailant is quick, skilful, and deadly. VIOLA. You mistake, sir; I am sure no man hath any quarrel to me: my remembrance is very free and clear from any image of offence done to any man. SIR TOBY. You'll find it otherwise, I assure you. Therefore, if you hold your life at any price, betake you to your guard; for your opposite hath in him what youth, strength, skill, and wrath can furnish man withal. VIOLA. I pray you, sir, what is he? SIR TOBY. He is knight, dubb'd with unhatch'd rapier and on carpet consideration; but he is a devil in private brawl: souls and bodies hath he divorc'd three; and his incensement at this moment is so implacable that satisfaction can be none but by pangs of death and sepulchre. Hob, nob, is his word; give 't or take 't. VIOLA. I will return again into the house and desire some conduct of the lady. I am no fighter. I have heard of some kind of men that put quarrels purposely on others, to taste their valour; belike this is a man of that quirk. SIR TOBY. Sir, no; his indignation derives itself out of a very competent injury. Therefore get you on and give him his desire. Back you shall not to the house, unless you undertake that with me which with as much safety you might answer him. Therefore on, or strip your sword stark naked; for meddle you must, that 's certain, or forswear to wear iron about you. VIOLA. This is as uncivil as strange. I beseech you, do me this courteous office, as to know of the knight what my offence to him is; it is something of my negligence, nothing of my purpose. SIR TOBY. I will do so. Signior Fabian, stay you by this gentleman till my return. [Exit.] VIOLA. Pray you, sir, do you know of this matter? FABIAN. I know the knight is incens'd against you, even to a mortal arbitrement; but nothing of the circumstance more. VIOLA. I beseech you, what manner of man is he? FABIAN. Nothing of that wonderful promise, to read him by his form, as you are like to find him in the proof of his valour. He is, indeed, sir, the most skilful, bloody, and fatal opposite that you could possibly have found in any part of Illyria. Will you walk towards him? I will make your peace with him, if I can. VIOLA. I shall be much bound to you for 't. I am one that had rather go with sir priest than sir knight; I care not who knows so much of my mettle. [Exeunt.] [Re-enter SIR TOBY, with SIR ANDREW.] SIR TOBY. Why, man, he's a very devil; I have not seen such a firago. I had a pass with him, rapier, scabbard, and all, and he gives me the stuck in with such a mortal motion that it is inevitable; and, on the answer, he pays you as surely as your feet hit the ground they step on. They say he has been fencer to the Sophy. SIR ANDREW. Pox on 't, I'll not meddle with him. SIR TOBY. Ay, but he will not now be pacified; Fabian can scarce hold him yonder. SIR ANDREW. Plague on 't; and I thought he had been valiant and so cunning in fence, I'd have seen him damn'd ere I 'd have challeng'd him. Let him let the matter slip, and I 'll give him my horse, gray Capilet. SIR TOBY. I 'll make the motion. Stand here, make a good show on 't; this shall end without the perdition of souls. [Aside] Marry, I 'll ride your horse as well as I ride you. [Re-enter FABIAN and VIOLA.] [To FABIAN] I have his horse to take up the quarrel; I have persuaded him the youth 's a devil. FABIAN. He is as horribly conceited of him; and pants and looks pale, as if a bear were at his heels. SIR TOBY. [To VIOLA] There 's no remedy, sir: he will fight with you for 's oath sake. Marry, he hath better bethought him of his quarrel, and he finds that now scarce to be worth talking of: therefore draw, for the supportance of his vow; he protests he will not hurt you. VIOLA. [Aside] Pray God defend me! A little thing would make me tell them how much I lack of a man. FABIAN. Give ground, if you see him furious. SIR TOBY. Come, Sir Andrew, there's no remedy; the gentleman will, for his honour's sake, have one bout with you; he cannot by the duello avoid it; but he has promis'd me, as he is a gentleman and a soldier, he will not hurt you. Come on; to 't. SIR ANDREW. Pray God, he keep his oath! VIOLA. I do assure you 't is against my will. [They draw] [Enter ANTONIO.] ANTONIO. Put up your sword. If this young gentleman Have done offence, I take the fault on me; If you offend him, I for him defy you. SIR TOBY. You, sir! why, what are you? ANTONIO. One, sir, that for his love dares yet do more Than you have heard him brag to you he will. SIR TOBY. Nay, if you be an undertaker, I am for you. [They draw] [Enter OFFICERS.] FABIAN. O good Sir Toby, hold! here come the officers. SIR TOBY. I 'll be with you anon. VIOLA. Pray, sir, put your sword up, if you please. SIR ANDREW. Marry, will I, sir; and, for that I promis'd you, I 'll be as good as my word; he will bear you easily, and reins well. 1 OFFICER. This is the man; do thy office. 2 OFFICER. Antonio, I arrest thee at the suit Of Count Orsino. ANTONIO. You do mistake me, sir. 1 OFFICER. No, sir, no jot; I know your favour well, Though now you have no sea-cap on your head. Take him away; he knows I know him well. ANTONIO. I must obey. [To VIOLA] This comes with seeking you: But there's no remedy; I shall answer it. What will you do, now my necessity Makes me to ask you for my purse? It grieves me Much more for what I cannot do for you Than what befalls myself. You stand amaz'd; But be of comfort. 2 OFFICER. Come, sir, away. ANTONIO. I must entreat of you some of that money. VIOLA. What money, sir? For the fair kindness you have show'd me here, And, part, being prompted by your present trouble, Out of my lean and low ability I 'll lend you something. My having is not much; I 'll make division of my present with you: Hold, there 's half my coffer. ANTONIO. Will you deny me now? Is 't possible that my deserts to you Can lack persuasion? Do not tempt my misery, Lest that it make me so unsound a man As to upbraid you with those kindnesses That I have done for you. VIOLA. I know of none; Nor know I you by voice or any feature. I hate ingratitude more in a man Than lying, vainness, babbling, drunkenness, Or any taint of vice whose strong corruption Inhabits our frail blood. ANTONIO. O heavens themselves! 2 OFFICER. Come, sir, I pray you, go. ANTONIO. Let me speak a little. This youth that you see here I snatch'd one half out of the jaws of death, Reliev'd him with such sanctity of love, And to his image, which methought did promise Most venerable worth, did I devotion. 1 OFFICER. What 's that to us? The time goes by; away! ANTONIO. But O how vile an idol proves this god! Thou hast, Sebastian, done good feature shame. In nature there 's no blemish but the mind; None can be call'd deform'd but the unkind. Virtue is beauty; but the beauteous evil Are empty trunks, o'erflourish'd by the devil. 1 OFFICER. The man grows mad; away with him! Come, come, sir. ANTONIO. Lead me on. [Exit with OFFICERS.] VIOLA. Methinks his words do from such passion fly That he believes himself; so do not I. Prove true, imagination, O, prove true, That I, dear brother, be now ta'en for you! SIR TOBY. Come hither, knight; come hither, Fabian; we 'll whisper o'er a couplet or two of most sage saws. VIOLA. He nam'd Sebastian. I my brother know Yet living in my glass; even such and so In favour was my brother; and he went Still in this fashion, colour, ornament, For him I imitate. O, if it prove, Tempests are kind, and salt waves fresh in love! [Exit.] SIR TOBY. A very dishonest paltry boy, and more a coward than a hare: his dishonesty appears in leaving his friend here in necessity and denying him; and for his cowardship, ask Fabian. FABIAN. A coward, a most devout coward, religious in it. SIR ANDREW. 'Slid, I'll after him again and beat him. SIR TOBY. Do; cuff him soundly, but never draw thy sword. SIR ANDREW. And I do not, - [Exit.] FABIAN. Come, let's see the event. SIR TOBY. I dare lay any money 't will be nothing yet. [Exeunt.] ACT IV. SCENE I. Before OLIVIA'S house. [Enter SEBASTIAN and CLOWN.] CLOWN. Will you make me believe that I am not sent for you? SEBASTIAN. Go to, go to, thou art a foolish fellow; Let me be clear of thee. CLOWN. Well held out, i' faith! No, I do not know you; nor I am not sent to you by my lady, to bid you come speak with her; nor your name is not Master Cesario; nor this is not my nose neither. Nothing that is so is so. SEBASTIAN. I prithee, vent thy folly somewhere else; Thou know'st not me. CLOWN. Vent my folly! He has heard that word of some great man, and now applies it to a fool. Vent my folly! I am afraid this great lubber, the world, will prove a cockney. I prithee now, ungird thy strangeness, and tell me what I shall vent to my lady; shall I vent to her that thou art coming? SEBASTIAN. I prithee, foolish Greek, depart from me. There 's money for thee; if you tarry longer, I shall give worse payment. CLOWN. By my troth, thou hast an open hand. These wise men that give fools money get themselves a good report after fourteen years' purchase. [Enter SIR ANDREW, SIR TOBY, and FABIAN.] SR ANDREW. Now, sir, have I met you again? there 's for you. SEBASTIAN. Why, there 's for thee, and there, and there. Are all the people mad? SIR TOBY. Hold, sir, or I 'll throw your dagger o'er the house. CLOWN. This will I tell my lady straight. I would not be in some of your coats for twopence. [Exit.] SIR TOBY. Come on, sir; hold. SIR ANDREW. Nay, let him alone: I 'll go another way to work with him; I 'll have an action of battery against him, if there be any law in Illyria: though I struck him first, yet it 's no matter for that. SEBASTIAN. Let go thy hand. SIR TOBY. Come, sir, I will not let you go. Come, my young soldier, put up your iron: you are well flesh'd; come on. SEBASTIAN. I will be free from thee. What wouldst thou now? If thou dar'st tempt me further, draw thy sword. SIR TOBY. What, what? Nay, then I must have an ounce or two of this malapert blood from you. [Enter OLIVIA.] OLIVIA. Hold, Toby; on thy life, I charge thee, hold! SIR TOBY. Madam! OLIVIA. Will it be ever thus? Ungracious wretch, Fit for the mountains and the barbarous caves, Where manners ne'er were preach'd! Out of my sight! Be not offended, dear Cesario. Rudesby, be gone! [Exeunt SIR TOBY, SIR ANDREW, and FABIAN.] I prithee, gentle friend, Let thy fair wisdom, not thy passion, sway In this uncivil and unjust extent Against thy peace. Go with me to my house; And hear thou there how many fruitless pranks This ruffian hath botch'd up, that thou thereby Mayst smile at this: thou shalt not choose but go; Do not deny. Beshrew his soul for me, He started one poor heart of mine in thee. SEBASTIAN. What relish is in this? how runs the stream? Or I am mad, or else this is a dream. Let fancy still my sense in Lethe steep; If it be thus to dream, still let me sleep! OLIVIA. Nay, come, I prithee. Would thou'dst be rul'd by me! SEBASTIAN. Madam, I will. OLIVIA. O, say so, and so be! [Exeunt.] SCENE II. OLIVIA'S house. [Enter MARIA and CLOWN.] MARIA. Nay, I prithee, put on this gown and this beard; make him believe thou art Sir Topas the curate: do it quickly; I 'll call Sir Toby the whilst. [Exit.] CLOWN. Well, I 'll put it on, and I will dissemble myself in 't; and I would I were the first that ever dissembl'd in such a gown. I am not tall enough to become the function well, nor lean enough to be thought a good student; but to be said an honest man and a good housekeeper goes as fairly as to say a careful man and a great scholar. The competitors enter. [Enter SIR TOBY and MARIA.] SIR TOBY. Jove bless thee, master parson! CLOWN. Bonos dies, Sir Toby: for, as the old hermit of Prague, that never saw pen and ink, very wittily said to niece of King Gorboduc, 'That that is is'; so I, being master parson, am master parson; for, what is 'that' but 'that,' and 'is' but 'is'? SIR TOBY. To him, Sir Topas. CLOWN. What, ho, I say, peace in this prison! SIR TOBY. The knave counterfeits well; a good knave. MALVOLIO. [Within] Who calls there? CLOWN. Sir Topas the curate, who comes to visit Malvolio the lunatic. MALVOLIO. Sir Topas, Sir Topas, good Sir Topas, go to my lady. CLOWN. Out, hyperbolical fiend! how vexest thou this man! talkest thou nothing but of ladies? SIR TOBY. Well said, master parson. MALVOLIO. Sir Topas, never was man thus wrong'd; good Sir Topas, do not think I am mad: they have laid me here in hideous darkness. CLOWN. Fie, thou dishonest Satan! I call thee by the most modest terms; for I am one of those gentle ones that will use the devil himself with courtesy. Say'st thou that house is dark? MALVOLIO. As hell, Sir Topas. CLOWN. Why, it hath bay-windows transparent as barricadoes, and the clerestories toward the south north are as lustrous as ebony; and yet complainest thou of obstruction? MALVOLIO. I am not mad, Sir Topas; I say to you, this house is dark. CLOWN. Madman, thou errest: I say, there is no darkness but ignorance; in which thou art more puzzl'd than the Egyptians in their fog. MALVOLIO. I say, this house is as dark as ignorance, though ignorance were as dark as hell; and I say, there was never man thus abus'd. I am no more mad than you are; make the trial of it in any constant question. CLOWN. What is the opinion of Pythagoras concerning wild fowl? MALVOLIO. That the soul of our grandam might haply inhabit a bird. CLOWN. What think'st thou of his opinion? MALVOLIO. I think nobly of the soul, and no way approve his opinion. CLOWN. Fare thee well. Remain thou still in darkness; thou shalt hold th' opinion of Pythagoras ere I will allow of thy wits, and fear to kill a woodcock lest thou dispossess the soul of thy grandam. Fare thee well. MALVOLIO. Sir Topas, Sir Topas! SIR TOBY. My most exquisite Sir Topas! CLOWN. Nay, I am for all waters. MARIA. Thou mightst have done this without thy beard and gown; he sees thee not. SIR TOBY. To him in thine own voice, and bring me word how thou find'st him; I would we were well rid of this knavery. If he may be conveniently deliver'd, I would he were, for I am now so far in offence with my niece that I cannot pursue with any safety this sport to the upshot. Come by and by to my chamber. [Exeunt SIR TOBY and MARIA.] CLOWN. [Singing] Hey, Robin, jolly Robin, Tell me how thy lady does. MALVOLIO. Fool, - CLOWN. My lady is unkind, perdy. MALVOLIO. Fool, - CLOWN. Alas, why is she so? MALVOLIO. Fool, I say, - CLOWN. She loves another - Who calls, ha? MALVOLIO. Good fool, as ever thou wilt deserve well at my hand, help me to a candle, and pen, ink, and paper; as I am a gentleman, I will live to be thankful to thee for't. CLOWN. Master Malvolio? MALVOLIO. Ay, good fool. CLOWN. Alas, sir, how fell you besides your five wits? MALVOLIO. Fool, there was never man so notoriously abus'd; I am as well in my wits, fool, as thou art. CLOWN. But as well? then you are mad indeed, if you be no better in your wits than a fool. MALVOLIO. They have here propertied me; keep me in darkness, send ministers to me, asses, and do all they can to face me out of my wits. CLOWN. Advise you what you say; the minister is here. Malvolio, Malvolio, thy wits the heavens restore! endeavour thyself to sleep, and leave thy vain bibble babble. MALVOLIO. Sir Topas! CLOWN. Maintain no words with him, good fellow. Who, I, sir? not I, sir. God be wi' you, good Sir Topas! Marry, amen. I will, sir, I will. MALVOLIO. Fool, fool, fool, I say! CLOWN. Alas, sir, be patient. What say you, sir? I am shent for speaking to you. MALVOLIO. Good fool, help me to some light and some paper. I tell thee, I am as well in my wits as any man in Illyria. CLOWN. Well-a-day that you were, sir! MALVOLIO. By this hand, I am. Good fool, some ink, paper, and light; and convey what I will set down to my lady. It shall advantage thee more than ever the bearing of letter did. CLOWN. I will help you to 't. But tell me true, are you not mad indeed, or do you but counterfeit? MALVOLIO. Believe me, I am not; I tell thee true. CLOWN. Nay, I'll ne'er believe a madman till I see his brains. I will fetch you light and paper and ink. MALVOLIO. Fool, I 'll requite it in the highest degree; I prithee, be gone. CLOWN. [Singing] I am gone, sir, And anon, sir, I 'll be with you again, In a trice, Like to the old Vice, Your need to sustain; Who, with dagger of lath, In his rage and his wrath, Cries, ah, ha! to the devil: Like a mad lad, Pare thy nails, dad; Adieu, goodman devil. [Exit.] SCENE III. OLIVIA'S garden. [Enter SEBASTIAN.] SEBASTIAN. This is the air; that is the glorious sun; This pearl she gave me, I do feel 't and see 't; And though 't is wonder that enwraps me thus, Yet 't is not madness. Where 's Antonio, then? I could not find him at the Elephant: Yet there he was; and there I found this credit, That he did range the town to seek me out. His counsel now might do me golden service; For though my soul disputes well with my sense, That this may be some error, but no madness, Yet doth this accident and flood of fortune So far exceed all instance, all discourse, That I am ready to distrust mine eyes And wrangle with my reason, that persuades me To any other trust but that I am mad, Or else the lady 's mad; yet if 't were so, She could not sway her house, command her followers, Take and give back affairs and their dispatch With such a smooth, discreet, and stable bearing As I perceive she does. There 's something in 't That is deceivable. But here the lady comes. [Enter OLIVIA and PRIEST.] OLIVIA. Blame not this haste of mine. If you mean well, Now go with me and with this holy man Into the chantry by. There, before him, And underneath that consecrated roof, Plight me the full assurance of your faith; That my most jealous and too doubtful soul May live at peace. He shall conceal it Whiles you are willing it shall come to note, What time we will our celebration keep According to my birth. What do you say? SEBASTIAN. I 'll follow this good man, and go with you; And, having sworn truth, ever will be true. OLIVIA. Then lead the way, good father; and heavens so shine That they may fairly note this act of mine! [Exeunt.] ACT V. SCENE I. Before OLIVIA's house. [Enter CLOWN and FABIAN.] FABIAN. Now, as thou lov'st me, let me see his letter. CLOWN. Good Master Fabian, grant me another request. FABIAN. Any thing. CLOWN. Do not desire to see this letter. FABIAN. This is, to give a dog, and in recompense desire my dog again. [Enter DUKE, VIOLA, CURIO, and LORDS.] DUKE. Belong you to the Lady Olivia, friends? CLOWN. Ay, sir; we are some of her trappings. DUKE. I know thee well; how dost thou, my good fellow? CLOWN. Truly, sir, the better for my foes and the worse for my friends. DUKE. Just the contrary; the better for thy friends. CLOWN. No, sir, the worse. DUKE. How can that be? CLOWN. Marry, sir, they praise me and make an ass of me. Now my foes tell me plainly I am an ass: so that by my foes, sir, I profit in the knowledge of myself, and by my friends I am abus'd: so that, conclusions to be as kisses, if your four negatives make your two affirmatives, why, then the worse for my friends and the better for my foes. DUKE. Why, this is excellent. CLOWN. By my troth, sir, no; though it please you to be one of my friends. DUKE. Thou shalt not be the worse for me; there's gold. CLOWN. But that it would be double-dealing, sir, I would you could make it another. DUKE. O, you give me ill counsel. CLOWN. Put your grace in your pocket, sir, for this once, and let your flesh and blood obey it. DUKE. Well, I will be so much a sinner to be a double-dealer; there's another. CLOWN. Primo, secundo, tertio, is a good play; and the old saying is, the third pays for all: the triplex, sir, is a good tripping measure; or the bells of Saint Bennet, sir, may put you in mind; one, two, three. DUKE. You can fool no more money out of me at this throw; if you will let your lady know I am here to speak with her, and bring her along with you, it may awake my bounty further. CLOWN. Marry, sir, lullaby to your bounty till I come again. I go, sir; but I would not have you to think that my desire of having is the sin of covetousness: but, as you say, sir, let your bounty take a nap, I will awake it anon. [Exit.] VIOLA. Here comes the man, sir, that did rescue me. [Enter ANTONIO and OFFICERS .] DUKE. That face of his I do remember well; Yet, when I saw it last, it was besmear'd As black as Vulcan in the smoke of war. A baubling vessel was he captain of, For shallow draught and bulk unprizable; With which such scathful grapple did he make With the most noble bottom of our fleet That very envy and the tongue of loss Cried fame and honour on him. What 's the matter? 1 OFFICER. Orsino, this is that Antonio That took the Phoenix and her fraught from Candy; And this is he that did the Tiger board, When your young nephew Titus lost his leg. Here in the streets, desperate of shame and state, In private brabble did we apprehend him. VIOLA. He did me kindness, sir; drew on my side; But in conclusion put strange speech upon me; I know not what 't was but distraction. DUKE. Notable pirate! thou salt-water thief! What foolish boldness brought thee to their mercies, Whom thou, in terms so bloody and so dear, Hast made thine enemies? ANTONIO. Orsino, noble sir, Be pleas'd that I shake off these names you give me; Antonio never yet was thief or pirate, Though, I confess, on base and ground enough, Orsino's enemy. A witchcraft drew me hither: That most ingrateful boy there by your side, From the rude sea's enrag'd and foamy mouth Did I redeem; a wreck past hope he was. His life I gave him, and did thereto ad My love, without retention or restraint, All his in dedication; for his sake Did I expose myself, pure for his love, Into the danger of this adverse town; Drew to defend him when he was beset: Where being apprehended, his false cunning, Not meaning to partake with me in danger, Taught him to face me out of his acquaintance, And grew a twenty years removed thing While one would wink; denied me mine own purse, Which I had recommended to his use Not half an hour before. VIOLA. How can this be? DUKE. When came he to this town? ANTONIO. To-day, my lord; and for three months before, No interim, not a minute's vacancy, Both day and night did we keep company. [Enter OLIVIA and ATTENDANTS.] DUKE. Here comes the countess; now heaven walks on earth. But for thee, fellow, - fellow, thy words are madness; Three months this youth hath tended upon me; But more of that anon. Take him aside. OLIVIA. What would my lord, but that he may not have, Wherein Olivia may seem serviceable? Cesario, you do not keep promise with me. VIOLA. Madam! DUKE. Gracious Olivia, - OLIVIA. What do you say, Cesario? Good my lord, - VIOLA. My lord would speak; my duty hushes me. OLIVIA. If it be aught to the old tune, my lord, It is as fat and fulsome to mine ear As howling after music. DUKE. Still so cruel? OLIVIA. Still so constant, lord. DUKE. What, to perverseness? you uncivil lady, To whose ingrate and unauspicious altars My soul the faithfull'st off'rings have breath'd out That e'er devotion tender'd! What shall I do? OLIVIA. Even what it please my lord that shall become him. DUKE. Why should I not, had I the heart to do it, Like to th' Egyptian thief at point of death, Kill what I love? - a savage jealousy That sometime savours nobly. But hear me this: Since you to non-regardance cast my faith, And that I partly know the instrument That screws me from my true place in your favour, Live you the marble-breasted tyrant still; But this your minion, whom I know you love, And whom, by heaven I swear, I tender dearly, Him will I tear out of that cruel eye, Where he sits crowned in his master's spite. Come, boy, with me; my thoughts are ripe in mischief; I 'll sacrifice the lamb that I do love, To spite a raven's heart within a dove. VIOLA. And I, most jocund, apt, and willingly, To do you rest, a thousand deaths would die. OLIVIA. Where goes Cesario? VIOLA. After him I love More than I love these eyes, more than my life, More, by all mores, than ere I shall love wife. If I do feign, you witnesses above, Punish my life for tainting of my love! OLIVIA. Ay me, detested! how am I beguil'd! VIOLA. Who does beguile you? who does do you wrong? OLIVIA. Hast thou forgot thyself? is it so long? Call forth the holy father. DUKE. Come, away! OLIVIA. Whither, my lord? Cesario, husband, stay. DUKE. Husband! OLIVIA. Ay, husband! can he that deny? DUKE. Her husband, sirrah! VIOLA. No, my lord, not I. OLIVIA. Alas, it is the baseness of thy fear That makes thee strangle thy propriety. Fear not, Cesario; take thy fortunes up; Be that thou know'st thou art, and then thou art As great as that thou fear'st. [Enter PRIEST.] O, welcome, father! Father, I charge thee, by thy reverence, Here to unfold, though lately we intended To keep in darkness what occasion now Reveals before 't is ripe, what thou dost know Hath newly pass'd between this youth and me. PRIEST. A contract of eternal bond of love, Confirm'd by mutual joinder of your hands, Attested by the holy close of lips, Strengthen'd by interchangement of your rings; And all the ceremony of this compact Seal'd in my function, by my testimony; Since when, my watch hath told me, toward my grave I have travell'd but two hours. DUKE. O thou dissembling cub! what wilt thou be When time hath sow'd a grizzle on thy case? Or will not else thy craft so quickly grow That thine own trip shall be thine overthrow? Farewell, and take her; but direct thy feet Where thou and I henceforth may never meet. VIOLA. My lord, I do protest, - OLIVIA. O, do not swear! Hold little faith, though thou has too much fear. [Enter SIR ANDREW.] SIR ANDREW. For the love of God, a surgeon! Send one presently to Sir Toby. OLIVIA. What 's the matter? SIR ANDREW. Has broke my head across and has given Sir Toby a bloody coxcomb too; for the love of God, your help! I had rather than forty pound I were at home. OLIVIA. Who has done this, Sir Andrew? SIR ANDREW. The count's gentleman, one Cesario; we took him for a coward, but he 's the very devil incardinate. DUKE. My gentleman Cesario? SIR ANDREW. 'Od's lifelings, here he is! You broke my head for nothing; and that that I did, I was set on to do 't by Sir Toby. VIOLA. Why do you speak to me? I never hurt you. You drew your sword upon me without cause; But I bespake you fair, and hurt you not. SIR ANDREW. If a bloody coxcomb be a hurt, you have hurt me; I think you set nothing by a bloody coxcomb. [Enter SIR TOBY and CLOWN.] Here comes Sir Toby halting; you shall hear more: but if he had not been in drink, he would have tickl'd you othergates than he did. DUKE. How now, gentleman! how is 't with you? SIR TOBY. That 's all one. Has hurt me, and there 's th' end on 't. Sot, didst see Dick Surgeon, sot? CLOWN. O, he 's drunk, Sir Toby, an hour agone; his eyes were set at eight i' th' morning. SIR TOBY. Then he 's a rogue, and a passy measures pavin. I hate a drunken rogue. OLIVIA. Away with him! Who hath made this havoc with them? SIR ANDREW. I 'll help you, Sir Toby, because we 'll be dress'd together. SIR TOBY. Will you help? an ass-head and a coxcomb and a knave! a thin-fac'd knave, a gull! OLIVIA. Get him to bed, and let his hurt be look'd to. [Exeunt CLOWN, FABIAN, SIR TOBY, and SIR ANDREW.] [Enter SEBASTIAN.] SEBASTIAN. I am sorry, madam, I have hurt your kinsman But, had it been the brother of my blood, I must have done no less with wit and safety. You throw a strange regard upon me, and by that I do perceive it hath offended you; Pardon me, sweet one, even for the vows We made each other but so late ago. DUKE. One face, one voice, one habit, and two persons, A natural perspective, that is and is not! SEBASTIAN. Antonio, O my dear Antonio! How have the hours rack'd and tortur'd me, Since I have lost thee! ANTONIO. Sebastian are you? SEBASTIAN. Fear'st thou that, Antonio? ANTONIO. How have you made division of yourself? An apple cleft in two is not more twin Than these two creatures. Which is Sebastian? OLIVIA. Most wonderful! SEBASTIAN. Do I stand there? I never had a brother; Nor can there be that deity in my nature, Of here and everywhere. I had a sister, Whom the blind waves and surges have devour'd. Of charity, what kin are you to me? What countryman? what name? what parentage? VIOLA. Of Messaline: Sebastian was my father; Such a Sebastian was my brother too, So went he suited to his watery tomb. If spirits can assume both form and suit, You come to fright us. SEBASTIAN. A spirit I am indeed; But am in that dimension grossly clad Which from the womb I did participate. Were you a woman, as the rest goes even, I should my tears let fall upon your cheek, And say, 'Thrice-welcome, drowned Viola!' VIOLA. My father had a mole upon his brow. SEBASTIAN. And so had mine. VIOLA. And died that day when Viola from her birth Had numb'red thirteen years. SEBASTIAN. O, that record is lively in my soul! He finished, indeed, his mortal act That day that made my sister thirteen years. VIOLA. If nothing lets to make us happy both But this my masculine usurp'd attire, Do not embrace me till each circumstance Of place, time, fortune, do cohere and jump That I am Viola: which to confirm, I 'll bring you to a captain in this town, Where lie my maiden weeds; by whose gentle help I was preserv'd to serve this noble count. All the occurrence of my fortune since Hath been between this lady and this lord. SEBASTIAN. [To OLIVIA] So comes it, lady, you have been mistook; But nature to her bias drew in that. You would have been contracted to a maid; Nor are you therein, by my life, deceiv'd, You are betroth'd both to a maid and man. DUKE. Be not amaz'd; right noble is his blood. If this be so, as yet the glass seems true, I shall have share in this most happy wreck. [To VIOLA] Boy, thou hast said to me a thousand times Thou never shouldst love woman like to me. VIOLA. And all those sayings will I over-swear; And all those swearings keep as true in soul As doth that orbed continent the fire That severs day from night. DUKE. Give me thy hand; And let me see thee in thy woman's weeds. VIOLA. The captain that did bring me first on shore Hath my maid's garments; he, upon some action, Is now in durance, at Malvolio's suit, A gentleman and follower of my lady's. OLIVIA. He shall enlarge him. Fetch Malvolio hither; And yet, alas, now I remember me, They say, poor gentleman, he 's much distract. [Re-enter CLOWN with a letter, and FABIAN.] A most extracting frenzy of mine own From my remembrance clearly banish'd his. How does he, sirrah? CLOWN. Truly, madam, he holds Belzebub at the stave's end as well as a man in his case may do. Has here writ a letter to you; I should have given 't you to-day morning; but as a madman's epistles are no gospels, so it skills not much when they are deliver'd. OLIVIA. Open 't, and read it. CLOWN. Look then to be well edified when the fool delivers the madman. [Reads] By the Lord, madam, - OLIVIA. How now! art thou mad? CLOWN. No, madam, I do but read madness: and your ladyship will have it as it ought to be, you must allow Vox. OLIVIA. Prithee, read i' thy right wits. CLOWN. So I do, madonna; but to read his right wits is to read thus: therefore perpend, my princess, and give ear. OLIVIA. [To FABIAN] Read it you, sirrah. FABIAN. [Reads] By the Lord, madam, you wrong me, and the world shall know it; though you have put me into darkness and given your drunken cousin rule over me, yet have I the benefit of my senses as well as your ladyship. I have your own letter that induc'd me to the semblance I put on; with the which I doubt not but to do myself much right, or you much shame. Think of me as you please. I leave my duty a little unthought of, and speak out of my injury. THE MADLY-US'D MALVOLIO. OLIVIA. Did he write this? CLOWN. Ay, madam. DUKE. This savours not much of distraction. OLIVIA. See him deliver'd, Fabian; bring him hither. [Exit FABIAN.] My lord, so please you, these things further thought on, To think me as well a sister as a wife, One day shall crown th' alliance on 't, so please you, Here at my house, and at my proper cost. DUKE. Madam, I am most apt t' embrace your offer. [To VIOLA] Your master quits you; and, for your service done him, So much against the mettle of your sex, So far beneath your soft and tender breeding, And since you call'd me master for so long, Here is my hand; you shall from this time be Your master's mistress. OLIVIA. A sister! you are she. [Re-enter FABIAN, with MALVOLIO.] DUKE. Is this the madman? OLIVIA. Ay, my lord, this same. How now, Malvolio! MALVOLIO. Madam, you have done me wrong, Notorious wrong. OLIVIA. Have I, Malvolio? no. MALVOLIO. Lady, you have. Pray you peruse that letter. You must not now deny it is your hand; Write from it, if you can, in hand or phrase; Or say 't is not your seal, not your invention: You can say none of this. Well, grant it then; And tell me, in the modesty of honour, Why you have given me such clear lights of favour, Bade me come smiling and cross-garter'd to you, To put on yellow stockings, and to frown Upon Sir Toby and the lighter people; And, acting this in an obedient hope, Why have you suffer'd me to be imprison'd, Kept in a dark house, visited by the priest, And made the most notorious geck and gull That e'er invention play'd on? tell me why. OLIVIA. Alas, Malvolio, this is not my writing, Though, I confess, much like the character; But out of question 't is Maria's hand. And now I do bethink me, it was she First told me thou wast mad; then cam'st in smiling, And in such forms which here were presuppos'd Upon thee in the letter. Prithee, be content: This practice hath most shrewdly pass'd upon thee, But when we know the grounds and authors of it, Thou shalt be both the plaintiff and the judge Of thine own cause. FABIAN. Good madam, hear me speak; And let no quarrel nor no brawl to come Taint the condition of this present hour, Which I have wond'red at. In hope it shall not, Most freely I confess myself and Toby Set this device against Malvolio here, Upon some stubborn and uncourteous parts We had conceiv'd against him. Maria writ The letter at Sir Toby's great importance; In recompense whereof he hath married her. How with a sportful malice it was follow'd May rather pluck on laughter than revenge; If that the injuries be justly weigh'd That have on both sides pass'd. OLIVIA. Alas, poor fool, how have they baffl'd thee! CLOWN. Why, 'some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrown upon them.' I was one, sir, in this interlude; one Sir Topas, sir; but that 's all one. 'By the Lord, fool, I am not mad'; but do you remember? 'Madam, why laugh you at such a barren rascal? and you smile not, he 's gagg'd': and thus the whirligig of time brings in his revenges. MALVOLIO. I 'll be reveng'd on the whole pack of you. [Exit.] OLIVIA. He hath been most notoriously abus'd. DUKE. Pursue him, and entreat him to a peace. He hath not told us of the captain yet; When that is known, and golden time convents, A solemn combination shall be made Of our dear souls. Meantime, sweet sister, We will not part from hence. Cesario, come; For so you shall be, while you are a man; But, when in other habits you are seen, Orsino's mistress and his fancy's queen. [Exeunt all but the CLOWN.] CLOWN. [Sings.] When that I was and a little tiny boy, With hey, ho, the wind and the rain, A foolish thing was but a toy, For the rain it raineth every day. But when I came to man's estate, With hey, ho, &c. 'Gainst knaves and thieves men shut their gate, For the rain, &c. But when I came, alas! to wive, With hey, ho, &c. By swaggering could I never thrive, For the rain, &c. But when I came unto my beds, With hey, ho, &c. With toss-pots still had drunken heads, For the rain, &c. A great while ago the world begun, With hey, ho, &c. But that's all one, our play is done, And we'll strive to please you every day. [Exit.] THE END Publication Date: May 29th 2008 https://www.bookrix.com/-bx.shakespeare
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-j-c-laird-jake-and-the-girl-with-the-pretty-legs/
J.C. Laird Jake and the Girl with the Pretty Legs BookRix GmbH & Co. KG 81371 Munich Jake and the Girl with the Pretty Legs The butterfly effect. Something seemingly random and insignificant starts a chain reaction of events that somewhere in the future may lead to a life-altering—or as in Rachel’s case—a life-saving event. This time that “something” was a red traffic light. Rachel maneuvered her black, Nissan Maxima into the far left lane of I-25, preparing to make a left turn onto Central Avenue. She had thirty minutes to get to the bank, make a withdrawal and get back to the University of New Mexico for her class. She hoped her parents had transferred money into her account; the income from her part-time job at the Athletic Department didn’t come close to covering everything. As she slowed and approached the intersection she saw an old man standing on the corner holding a small, makeshift cardboard sign with a short message scrawled on it. She squinted in the sunlight—she’d misplaced her sunglasses again—to read the nearly illegible writing: HOMELESS VET-NEED HELP-GOD BLESS. She glanced up at the looming traffic signal. If it stayed green, the hobo was out of luck. If it turned red, she would find something to give him. As if responding to her thoughts, the light turned red. She stopped…and the butterfly flicked its wings. Rachel waved the man over. He came scurrying towards her, dirty and unkempt, wearing a worn army-fatigue jacket, covering a soiled t-shirt, faded and frayed blue jeans and tennis shoes that—maybe—had once been white. A battered ‘U.S. Army’ ball cap was perched on his head, struggling to cover unruly grey hair spiking from the edges in all directions. A matching, scraggly beard partially covered a darkly tanned, weathered face. Rachel estimated him to be in his late sixties or early seventies. She didn’t remember seeing this particular panhandler around before. But then, there were so many of them. She fumbled through her purse on the seat next to her; she always tried to keep a few one-dollar bills on hand for just these occasions. Her roommate, Wynne, thought that she was throwing her money away, that the beggars were just using the money for booze and drugs. Maybe some of them were, Rachel mused, but some just needed help, she was sure. And she could never completely reconcile the fortunate circumstances of her life with the less fortunate ones of those destined to wander the streets, with little hope, and a barren future stretching before them. She didn’t understand the whys or wherefores of how these things came to be, only that they made her sad. When she rolled down her window, a slight breeze carried in the unpleasant odor of unwashed clothes and unwashed body. She wrinkled her nose, but realized that the hobo had at least tried to cover the smell with some type of cheap cologne—a kind of men’s musk scent—that made her want to weep. No ones, only a lonely five in her purse. She turned back to hand the man the money, only to find him staring at her bare legs. It was a warm October day, and Rachel was wearing shorts. They weren’t Daisy Dukes, but they qualified as first cousins; there was a lot of leg to see. She was well aware that men found her attractive, with her dark hair and dark eyes on a 5’5,” 125 lb. feminine frame with the curves in all the places God meant them to be. Maybe she should have been offended or afraid. But the man’s reaction when he realized that he had been caught looking was almost comical. He shuffled back a couple of steps, his watery, pale blue eyes cast down towards the ground in embarrassment. He looked to the left, then the right, everywhere but at her. She thought that he was even blushing beneath his rough, weathered skin. He began stammering, “I’m sorry ma’am…I didn’t mean…shouldn’t be looking…it’s just…” He kept looking down and around, but not at her. “Sometimes I forget…I’m sorry ma’am.” Rachel had to bite her lip to keep from laughing; the man’s embarrassment was so acute. As it was, she couldn’t keep her expression from turning into a huge grin. She held the five dollar bill out the window. “I’m only twenty-four. I’m not a ma’am yet, just a miss. Here, take it, it’s okay, I’m not angry.” He finally looked at her and, seeing that she really wasn’t upset with him, allowed a smile to creep back onto his face. He took the money and said, “You have real pretty legs, Miss.” She finally did laugh. “Why, thank you.” Men had used various terms to describe Rachel’s physical charms, but she couldn’t recall hearing the simple ‘pretty legs’ before. Impulsively she asked, “What’s your name?” Looking down at the ground like an embarrassed child, he answered, “Jake.” Now the horns on the cars behind Rachel had begun blaring; the traffic light had turned green. The old man trotted off the roadway, back onto the shoulder. Rachel whispered, “Good luck, Jake,” and she slowly drove away. # Three days later Rachel saw Jake again. She was out jogging in the early afternoon sunshine, clad in red running shorts and a t-shirt that declared ‘WOMEN WHO BEHAVE RARELY MAKE HISTORY.’ She was moving at a good pace along a path parallel with Central Avenue when she caught sight of the green army jacket and ball cap across the street, near the local Wendy’s Restaurant. She altered her course and crossed over at the light at University and Central. He was standing near the sidewalk in Wendy’s parking lot, a well-worn army knapsack on his back and a frayed army duffel bag resting on the ground next to him. They may well have been relics from a World War II army surplus store. Jake looked at her as she jogged up. For several seconds he stared blankly. But then, glancing down, his eyes lit up. “The girl with the pretty legs!” She laughed. “Okay Jake, enough with the pretty legs stuff; my name’s Rachel.” His simple, huge grin revealed, amazingly, a full set of teeth, albeit several shades removed from white. Then his smile faltered. “What’s the problem, Jake?” she asked. He looked back at her, then at the Wendy’s behind him. “I’m hungry, but they don’t like me inside. I’m bad for customers…or something.” He pulled a dollar out of one of his coat pockets. “And I got money too.” She took a deep breath. “My treat for lunch. What would you like?” Wynne would probably think she was crazy. Jake could hardly contain his excitement. “A double cheese burger, some French fries and one of them big Frosties!” Rachel was back five minutes later, with a Frosty for herself, too After taking the food from Rachel, Jake was back to looking at the ground and shifting his weight from foot to foot. “Would you…aaah…eat lunch with me?” he stammered. “Sure, where?” Rachel couldn’t quite believe she’d accepted. Wynne would think she’d lost her mind. He motioned across the street at a large expanse of University property on the corner adjoining the campus, the grass shaded by a number of wide crowned, long- needled evergreen trees. It was under one of those trees that Jake pulled from his duffle bag an old, worn army blanket and spread it on the ground. The hem was frayed, and it was torn in a couple of places, but Jake handled the brown blanket as if it was expensive and delicate fine linen. People walking by occasionally stared, talked and whispered among themselves about the raggedy, homeless man and the pretty, college coed sitting and talking on the blanket. Rachel hardly heard them so engrossed was she in Jake’s conversation. Sometimes Jake rambled, sometimes his sentences became disjointed and sometimes he forgot his train of thought, but slowly, Rachel pieced together a little of Jake’s life. Jake Christopher Landry, his “whole full name” he called it, had been born and raised in the small town of Flat Rock, graduated high school there, and then attended a year of college at Eastern Michigan University. With the Viet Nam War in full swing, he had felt compelled to fight for his country, so he enlisted in the Army. He had almost completed his second tour of duty when the helicopter he was in was shot down. Severely injured, he had spent a month in a military hospital in Saigon, was transferred back to the States for another three month stay in a veteran’s hospital, followed by an agonizing, yearlong rehabilitation. Jake had a girlfriend when he left for ‘Nam, but not when he came back. Because not all of him came back. Oh, he had kept all of his arms and legs, all right. But part of his mind was gone—a permanent sacrifice for his country. He tapped the right side of his head with his knuckles. “I have a metal plate here where part of my head was.” Since then, Jake had wandered through the years, life becoming not much more than eating, sleeping and basic day to day functions to stay alive. Sometimes there were “special” good things for him, like Rachel, “a pretty girl who was nice to him.” He blushed, something he did easily in her presence. Besides functioning on a very simple level, Jake forgot things. During the warmer months he lived in the Bosque, the green belt of trees and vegetation along the Rio Grande River. During the winter months he slept at Joy Junction and the other homeless shelters around the city. But sometimes he forgot how to get there and had to ask people, just as he sometimes had to ask how to get back to the First Baptist Church near Lomas and Broadway, where they served free meals to the homeless. He couldn’t remember how long he’d “lived” in Albuquerque. He forgot street names. He forgot people’s names. But he said he’d remember Rachel. He promised he wouldn‘t forget her. He stopped talking, and pulled a worn picture out of a pocket in the backpack and handed it to her. “That’s me when I went to the Army.” In it was a serious looking young man, clad in an Army dress uniform, hat tucked under his left arm, ramrod straight and staring soberly into the camera. It was a very young version of Jake, with a buzz-cut and clean shaven. He was standing in front of a red Ford Mustang, maybe a ‘65 or ‘66. “You can have it if you want…” A panicked look overcame him, “…uh…Rachel…yes, Rachel.” A look of relief flooded his face when he managed to remember her name. Handing it back to him, she said, “I can’t take this Jake, it’s too important. It’s part of your life, who you are.” He was looking down and away from her now. “I just wanted you to know that I wasn’t always like this,” he mumbled. “I used to be a real person.” “My God, Jake…don’t say that…” Her eyes brimmed with tears, and her throat constricted with grief. The man before her might be a shell of the strong, committed young man in the picture, but they were both still Jake. Suddenly he was on his feet. “I have to go now. They’re coming.” He was looking past her, down the street. She followed his stare and saw two uniformed policemen two blocks away, talking in front of a store. “What’s the matter, Jake?” she asked, watching panic contort his face. “They don’t like people like me hanging around. They make me leave.” He picked up the old army blanket, carefully brushed off the loose grass sticking to it, and gently and painstakingly folded it. “That must be a very special blanket," she said.” He continued folding it, and then carefully put it back in his duffle bag. “It was my father’s from when he was in a war, World War II, in Europe. He gave it to me when I was little. Before I was like this. It’s all I have of his.” Hefting his duffle bag and back-pack, he turned to her. She could see tears in his faded blue eyes. “Thank you…ma’am, I mean…miss…er, Rachel…,” he faltered, but continued on. “Don’t forget… once I was different…better, that is…not like this.” Then his mind slipped gears again, and that childish and embarrassed smile creased his weathered and lined face. “You still have the prettiest legs I ever seen in my whole life.” He turned and walked away. Rachel watched until he had disappeared around the corner. She hadn’t known what else to do or say. # A week passed, and the clear, high desert nights of Albuquerque had become increasingly cold. It was late, after eleven pm, but Rachel had had a late dinner with her boyfriend, Jon, and she needed her daily run. Wynne said she was crazy to be jogging around town that late at night, but Rachel, in her baggy grey sweat suit to combat the cooling October night, was fearless. Besides, she had her trusty Mace in her pocket. She stuck to the well-lit areas around campus and the adjoining neighborhoods. But she was cold and decided to take a short-cut back to her apartment. She detoured between the two O.M.I. buildings near the loading dock—a route she had taken dozens of times. But this night, it was a terrible mistake. The first attacker, wearing a hooded sweat shirt, came out of the darker recesses of a doorway and hit her low, like a football player, driving her into the adjoining building’s stucco veneer. Her head thudded off the wall, the sledgehammer of pain buckling her knees, black stars on a brilliant white background exploding in front of her eyes. The man’s fist crashed into her jaw, and the stars grew bigger, threatening to meld into total darkness. Her legs failing her, she began a slow slide down the wall, but still managed to maintain her hold on consciousness, trying to concentrate on getting enough wind back in her lungs to scream. Mauling hands were pulling, yanking her sweatshirt and bra up, over and covering her head, pinning her arms above her. More hands, a second person, was pulling at her sweatpants, trying to pull them off as she sat dazed on the cold cement, propped weakly against the rough wall. Her sputtering mind latched onto one horrific word…rape…she was going to be raped! She would have screamed, but her jaws wouldn’t work anymore; all that came out was a hoarse, raspy moan through her clenched teeth and bleeding lips. Her mind lurched, stumbled, prayed, ‘Help me God…help me please…the Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want…’ Suddenly, miraculously, the grasping, grabbing hands were gone from her body. There were sounds of scuffling, swearing, fighting. A scream, someone tripping over her. Her mind registered that someone was trying to help her. Rachel slowly slumped over onto her side, gasping and gagging. The pain was so intense in her head and jaw that she thought she might vomit. She curled up into a half fetal position, bringing her knees up to her chest, but was too weak to work the sweatshirt down from over her arms and head. It was so dark and she was so cold. She couldn’t hear the sounds of fighting anymore. Then someone was covering her nakedness with something warm. She mercifully slid into unconsciousness, thinking and feeling no longer an option. # She could hear voices, words, disjointed sounds. Slowly, they began to coalesce, sticking to her consciousness. She opened her eyes, squinting at the red and blue flashing lights swirling through the darkness. Her head was throbbing and her jaw hurt. Slowly, things came into focus. Two police cars were parked near the loading dock entrance, their emergency lights slicing through the night. An ambulance was backed onto the down ramp, a stretcher with a moaning, inert shape awaited its loading. Rachel pushed herself into a sitting position, resting against the rough stucco wall. Two male EMT’s standing next to her, waiting until the second ambulance was ready for her, immediately knelt down. The older of the two spoke. “Take it easy, young lady, you might have a concussion; why don’t you lie back down?” Other than her head, jaw and swollen lips, everything seemed to be normal. “I’ll be okay.” A wave of nausea washed over her and it hurt to talk, but she wanted to know what was going on. “Did they catch the guys who attacked me?” With an audible grunt a heavy-set police officer, whom she hadn’t seen at first, knelt down beside her. “The other ambulance is hauling away the two guys who assaulted you. They were beaten pretty badly, but we can’t take credit for that. They confessed to attacking you, but said some young guy in an army uniform came out of nowhere and beat the hell out of them. A campus police officer on foot patrol heard yelling and screaming, came to investigate and found you and those two punks unconscious, but no sign of any army guy.” The grey-haired cop reminded Rachel of her father. He was still talking. “Any chance I can have that blanket and picture now?” he said. Rachel glanced down. Her sweat suit was back in place and a dark wool blanket was now covering her lower body. In her left hand—and clasped tightly to her body—was a threadbare, brown army blanket, and in her right, a photograph. Both hands were cramped and sore. “You’ve had a death grip on that old blanket and picture ever since we found you. You’ve been semi-conscious, but refused to let go of either. Someone had covered you with that blanket; I don’t know where the picture came from, either.” The officer reached out and touched her arm. “I’m Officer Mike Jenkins and I’ve been with the Albuquerque Police Department for thirty years. You have my word that I’ll take care of the blanket and picture and get them back to you.” He stood up and reached down. Rachel reluctantly released the old photograph from her stiff fingers. The blanket she brought to her face, the coarse surface a caress against her cheek, inhaling deeply the faint odor of sweat and musk. The tears came silently; she handed the blanket to the officer. Glancing from the photo to the smiling, but tearful, young woman before him, he asked, “Do you know the soldier in this picture?” “I’m only twenty-four, that picture’s like forty-five years old.” “And you know this how?” Officer Jenkins looked from the old army blanket to the photo, then back at Rachel. She remained silent. He sighed. “I don’t think I even want to know. We’ll get a description of the good-Samaritan from the perps and try to locate him.” Rachel’s smile faded a bit. “I think he’s gone, officer. I think, maybe, he was just on loan.” ###             Publisher: BookRix GmbH & Co. KG Implerstraße 24 81371 Munich Germany Text: John C. Laird Images: istockphoto.com Editing: Alexandra Laird All rights reserved. Publication Date: October 8th 2014 https://www.bookrix.com/-alsam2 ISBN: 978-3-7309-7790-3
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-shelby-alexis-collins/
Shelby Alexis Collins Alexis Collins A brisk, fall wind swirled through the trees and wrapped around Alexis as she walked down her street in the small town of Rogersville. Her old husky, Baylor, lead the way up to her old home. She had lived in the white, Victorian home for eight years now. She loved the white, wrap-around porch and blue shutters. She loved when she would come home from a walk and find smoke rising from the chimney and her little brother playing in the front yard. She loved that the big oak tree in the front yard had her initials scribbled on the trunk. She loved that she could smell the ocean from her bedroom window and that she could see it in the distance from her balcony. Alexis Collins loved her home, but the town was a whole other story. Alexis made her way up the stairs and looked at the old swing, swaying in the wind; inviting her to come and explore its secrets. She gladly accepted the invitation, as Baylor ran around the house to play with her younger brother, Sam. The wind continued its dance as more leaves took their fall place on the ground. She watched the display go on for a few minutes until she heard her mother calling from inside the house. Mrs. Collins glided out the door with the aroma of apples following her. “There you are.” Mrs. Collins sighed in relief. “Are you ready to go?” “Go where?” she asked, confused at such a question. Her family had plenty of friends around town, but they were the quiet sort; not getting out much for social events besides church. “The new neighbors down the street are having a get together so they can officially meet everyone in town and I’m afraid your father wants to go.” Mrs. Collins stated, putting her gloves on in distress. Mrs. Collins was never very fond of people or any social event; she would rather keep to herself. Alexis loved her mother dearly, but she definitely took after her father in that area; besides the fact she didn’t like anyone in the small town. Mr. Collins loved to go to social events and meet new people. He loved the taste of Christmas punch at the church Christmas party, or the sound of children playing at the summer town picnic. Through their differences, Mr. and Mrs. Collins were crazy about each other; even after 20 years of marriage and two kids. Alexis had always admired her parent’s love for each other. She could only pray that her and her future husband would one day have that special love. “That sounds nice. I’m sure it will be a lot of fun.” Alexis said, standing and walking in the warm house. “Ah Al, there you are! Did your mother tell you about the family that has just moved in down the street?” Mr. Collins asked in excitement. “Only that they are having a party tonight for the whole town. Which house did they move into, anyways?” “The Richards place!” Mr. Collins boasted, his excitement seeming to never cease. The Richards place is the finest house in all of Rogersville. The three story house lies deep within the pine woods and has a glorious look to it; like something you would find from an old novel. There is no explaining how amazing it truly is! The family that has just moved in must be really wealthy. Alexis thought to herself as she grabbed her coat and followed Mr. Collins out the door. The drive to the party didn’t take long, especially with Mr. Collins boasting about the family. “They have three kids ya know; a boy and two girls. The boy is about your age, Alexis, so I would like you to introduce yourself and maybe even smile. Sam, please try to be on your best behavior, you only get one chance at a first impression.” Mr. Collin went on. “Oh Stan, take it easy on them. It’s not like they are meeting royalty.” Mrs. Collins stated, her exasperation appearing once again. They pulled up to the house, still in awe of it all. The new family seemed to have made a barbeque themed party, including tiki torches all alongside the patio. People had already gathered around the grill and tables that were set up. Kids were already playing in the field next to the house, and the house was all lit up with candles in each window. Alexis got out of the car, looking around at all the people she didn’t like. For as long as she could remember, she couldn’t stand Rogersville. Everyone was always in each other’s business and they all seemed so stuck up to her. She hadn’t met a single person she liked in the eight years that she had lived here. “Welcome to our home.” A shorter lady greeted us. Her smile was as white as pearls and her voice was very warm and sincere, she looked athletic in her white jacket with her nutmeg hair pulled back into a ponytail. “I’m Barbara Andrews, my family and I just moved here a few days ago. I am so excited to meet every single one of you.” Her enthusiasm seemed to be contagious Alexis realized as she caught herself smiling back at the woman. “Good evening, I’m Stan Collins and this is my wife, Sarah, and my two kids, Alexis and Sam. It’s so great to finally have a new neighbor.” “Why Sarah, that is a lovely scarf!” Mrs. Andrews complimented. “Thank you and I love your pearl earrings.” Mrs. Collins stated shyly, motioning to the woman’s ears. “Well, please, come meet the rest of my family. I feel as if we will all be great friends.” Alexis followed Mrs. Andrews as she led them up onto the patio and to a man that looked to be working the grill. He was tall but also had that athletic look. His tan skin seemed to glow with his white shirt, and his smile only made his look more tan. He laughed along with the rest of the men as he flipped the hamburgers. “Darling, this is the Collins family. This is my husband, George.” She smiled, grabbing hold of her husband’s arm. “Nice to meet you, folks,” He greeted, loudly. “Welcome to our home.” Mr. Collins immediately started his talk of sports with Mr. Andrews as Mrs. Andrews led the rest of the group to the tables. “Sam, my two girls, Katie and Amber are about your age I think; they’re out in the field playing soccer actually. Why don’t you go join them,” Mrs. Andrews ushered him along, “Bryan, come here” she called to a tall boy, sitting next to two girls Alexis recognized from her school. He quickly ran over there, his dark brown hair flying in the wind. Alexis’ heart raced as she took in the sight of Bryan. He was much taller than her and very tan like the rest of his family, his brown hair seemed rather wavy and his smile seemed to glow. When he got close enough, she saw that his eyes were the prettiest blue she had ever seen. They were deep and captivating, like a book she couldn’t stop reading. “Yes, mom” He asked, looking at the group until his eyes landed on her, not seeming to want to move anywhere else. “This is Alexis Collins; I believe she attends the school you will be going to after fall break.” Mrs. Andrews smiled, ushering Mrs. Collins to go look at the rest of the house with her. The next thing she knew, Alexis was alone with this Bryan guy. She had never been good at talking to cute guys; it was one of her only weaknesses. “Hi, Alexis, I’m Bryan.” His smile seemed to melt her heart as he nodded towards the empty table next to them. “Would you like to sit down?” “Uh sure,” She tried to smile as they sat down, trying to think of something to talk about. “So how do you like this weather?” she heard herself ask. She quickly wished she had never asked the most boring conversation starter, thinking he would immediately be turned off, but he just… smiled. “I like it, but the clouds are a bit different from the almost constant sunshine in California. Do you enjoy the rain?” He asked easily, leaning back in his lawn chair. “Not really, but I’ve lived here for eight years so I’m kind of used to it by now.” Alexis gathered her composure as she propped her arms on the table. “That’s a long time. I’ve moved around a lot growing up, but I guess that comes with having nature photographers as parents.” “Wow that sounds so exciting.” Alexis commented, glancing across the table at him. His arms were folded over his chest and to her surprise; his blue eyes were watching her. “It can be at times.” He agreed, sitting for a moment in silence. “So what do you do for fun, Alexis Collins?” he finally asked. “I paint.” She stated, surprised at her own directness. Not many people knew she could paint, and she liked it that way… so why would she tell a stranger? “What do you like to paint?” He asked enthusiastically. “The ocean, but I can never get over there enough.” She sighed, “I think it’s the most beautiful thing.” Bryan remained silent for a few moments, lost in thought. “Would you like to see something cool?” He asked, already standing. “U-uh ok,” Alexis followed him as he led her around the big house to the edge of the woods. She hesitated but followed as they walked along a path. It was dark now, and hard to navigate through the brush. She followed his outline as he continued to talk. “I found this place yesterday and I think you’ll like it.” It seemed like a short time until they came out on the other side of the woods. To her amazement, she was standing on top of a cliff, looking out over the ocean. The last slit of a peachy color was going down over the horizon as boats made their way back to the harbor. The sight took her breath away. Bryan said nothing, but just sat down on the soft grass and looked out onto the horizon. Alexis followed and sat beside him, watching the boats come in closer. “This is incredible.” She whispered, not taking her eyes off the scene. Alexis went into a deep state of thought as she sat there. I never trust people, so why did I trust him? Why did I trust him enough to go through dark woods when I had no idea where we were going? I have spent all of five minutes with this boy! Have I lost my mind? Why is it so easy to talk to him? “Can I ask you something, Alexis?” he asked her, taking her off guard. “Sure.” She answered confidently. “I was wondering if you would show me around tomorrow. We’ve been so busy with unpacking, I haven’t had a chance to go by the school or see the town.” He seemed shy for the first time all night, not daring to look at her. His tan cheeks seemed to turn a different shade. “Yeah, I can do that.” She smiled, finally looking at him. His gaze met hers as his hand moved a piece of her red hair away from her face. “Good, I’m glad to have made a friend.” He smiled at her. His gaze remained there for a long while as if he was trying to take a mental picture, never to be thrown away. “We should probably go back, before my family has realized I’ve been gone.” She stated, rising to her feet. “You’re right. Here, take my hand so you don’t stumble around on the way back.” He grabbed her hand and took off for the woods. Alexis loved the feeling of having a boy’s hand in hers; a feeling she had never had before. They moved along the path quietly but quickly until they finally came to the exit. Walking through the tall trees, they saw the party was as alive as ever. People were dancing on the patio now, apparently already have eaten, and the kids were now playing hide and go seek. Alexis noticed her mother seemed very happy talking to Mrs. Andrews next to the fire pit, something she had rarely seen. “I guess we didn’t miss much.” Bryan smiled, releasing her hand to face the cold alone. “I’ll go get us some food if you would like to go ahead and sit down.” He stated, jogging over to the food. What a gentleman. She thought to herself as she went through the tables. “Alexis,” the two girls from school called her over. “What were you and Bryan doing in the woods?” They asked when she walked up to them. “Nothing, just showing me something,” Alexis tried hard to think of their names, but couldn’t think of them. “Oh, you probably don’t recognize us out of school. I’m Natalie.” the blonde stated as if reading her mind, looking at her friend, “and this is Lila. Have a seat.” Alexis sat down, confused at how nice they were being. They had hardly even known her name since the fourth grade. “Ok, so I didn’t know what you liked so I got you one of everything.” Bryan said, walking up and looking rather happy with himself. Taking the last empty seat between Alexis and Natalie, he immediately dug right in. “So, Bryan, I was just telling Alexis how great it is to have such a good guy in town now.” Natalie beamed, placing her delicate hand on his arm. “You were?” Alexis questioned, not remembering that conversation. Natalie could only give her a look as she continued to seek Bryan’s attention. “Anyways,” Natalie continued, “I was thinking I could show you around on Sunday.” “Actually, Alexis is going to show me around tomorrow.” He stated, before going back to his burger. Alexis didn’t think anything was wrong with that, but by the look on Natalie’s face apparently there was something very wrong with it. “Well, I didn’t realize you guys were so close.” Natalie said through clenched teeth, still trying to keep her smile. “Oh, not really, we just met.” Alexis said quickly, trying to keep the conversation going. “I think Alexis and I will be great friends, Natalie.” Bryan stated, smiling at Alexis. Natalie couldn’t take it anymore; mumbling an ‘excuse me’ Natalie and Lila left. “Why do you look so confused?” Bryan asked after a while, but Alexis didn’t answer; instead, she had her own questions. “Why do you think we will be such great friends?” Alexis questioned, looking down at her burger. “Because I want us to be, and I think we could get along really easily. We are both very artsy and I can tell that you’re not big on parties, and neither am I. You would rather sit and think rather than talk, just like me. I need a friend and it honestly looks like you need one too.” His words were soft but direct. “You act like you’ve known me for years.” Alexis stated quietly. “I feel as if I have…and-” but he was interrupted by someone calling for him from across the yard. “Bryan, come quick, your mom wants you!” Mr. Andrews called for him. Bryan stood and motioned for Alexis to come too. They walked side by side to the patio where Mrs. Andrews was dancing to the music. “You two looked like you were having too serious of a conversation to have at a party; dance!” She commanded, flowing across the patio/dance floor to her husband who was running the music. Alexis and Bryan stood there awkwardly as Mrs. Andrews had the song changed to a much slower pace. “May I have this dance?” Bryan asked, holding out his hand to her. Alexis had never danced before but she couldn’t help but take his hand in hers. She leaned her head against his shoulder as he swept her around the dance floor, holding her close. Alexis had never felt so safe before. She looked up into his eyes and knew he was serious when he said they would be great friends. What better way to come back from fall break on Monday but with a friend? She felt excitement for the first time in a long time. She couldn’t wait till tomorrow. Chapter 1 Chapter 1 Publication Date: December 22nd 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-shelbs1418
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-william-adams-killing-fire/
William Adams Killing Fire Ms.K my only inspiration Text: everthing!!!!!! All rights reserved. Publication Date: May 3rd 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-willadamsakabeatz
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-m-e-the-unexpected/
M E The Unexpected The Life of the Teenager And so it Begins This is where my story beings. My life was going well; it was exactly how I pictured it. My dad comes home from work every day I see him and say hi to him. I come home from school I see my mom getting ready for work. I thought to myself how I have never seen her so happy in my life. When I get to my room I go on my laptop and see who is online. I see Kyle is on. Kyle is one of the coolest guys I know, but also the hottest guy I know. Kyle_Baseball: Hey! Kaitlyn_Girl123: Hey! Kyle_Baseball: What’s up? Kaitlyn_Girl123: At home in my room on my bed bored to death, you? Kyle_Baseball: in my room talking to my best friend. Kaitlyn_Girl123: Who is that? Kyle_Baseball: You of course. Kaitlyn_Girl123: Awesome, But you won’t like what I am about to say then. Kyle_Baseball: Oh Boy what is it? Kaitlyn_Girl123: I am Moving. I am moving to LA. I will be going to this brand new school called LAHS for my freshmen through senior years. Kyle_Baseball: I thought we were going to go to high school together because we are so close and best friends, please don’t leave me! I can’t go to high school without my best friend! Kaitlyn_Girl123: I’m sorry! I really am, maybe you can join me it is supposed to be the best high school in the USA. Kyle_Baseball: Can’t, I really want to but can’t! Kaitlyn_Girl123: Then we will be reunited for college. I hope we end up staying connected. I leave tomorrow! Kyle_Baseball has logged off When he logged off I knew he was mad at me. My moving to LAHS will change my whole life. I got in to LAHS. I still can’t believe it. I will miss hanging out with him forever. I get offline and start packing. When I am done packing I put everything in the moving truck and go to bed. I had to sleep on the stiff, cold, hard, uncomfortable ground. I get up the next morning and get in the car. We drive all the way from Newberry Florida to LA. I get a text from Kyle. “Hey I am sorry I got all mad at you last night, I know you want to go, It is great you got into LAHS I am so proud of you getting into that school. I looked it up online, and found out all about it. Now I know why you want to go there, I do too.” I text him back, “Hey, I am glad you’re not mad at me anymore. I really think this is the best thing for me right now and I need this.” I really miss him already. We pull up to the house and I see how my house is. It is really nice. I am nervous to start my freshmen year without any of my friends. I pick my room and unpack. It is huge compared to my old one. When I unpack my laptop I get online. No one I want to talk to is on. I look at Kyle’s status which says “Life will change without you here!” I comment on it saying, “Who is this about?” Now I wait for him to get on and comment back. He isn’t doing well about me leaving. I look at the bottom of the page and I see it says “Kyle_Baseball is online” Kyle_Baseball: You’re on! That is wonderful! Kaitlyn_Girl123: Yeah I have been on I just unpacked my laptop waiting to see how you are. Kyle_Baseball: Oh you know me I am always okay you know that right? Kaitlyn_Girl123: Yeah I know you but you were really upset when I told you the bad news. Kyle_Baseball: yeah I was, I still am, my status is about you. Well since you’re far away, can I tell you something and promise me that you will not judge me and keep talking to me. Kaitlyn_Girl123: Yeah I promise now tell me! Kyle_Baseball: I like you more than a friend; I have liked you since I met you and I will never stop. Kaitlyn_Girl123: Are you serious? I like you too; I have liked you for a long time. Kyle_Baseball: Wow I wish we could date but long distance doesn’t work ever. But I don’t care. On school breaks I can come visit or you can. Kaitlyn_Girl123: Yeah but still. Kyle_Baseball: Will you go out with me? Kaitlyn_Girl123: Yes! I hope long distance works this time. Kyle_Baseball: Me too I changed my status to is in a relationship and I also changed my name on it. So did Kyle. I really hope this year goes by fast. Tomorrow is the first day of school so I went to bed early. I went to bed and woke up the next morning with my mother of an alarm clock. After I get ready I go to school and meet everyone. I miss my old friends though. I walk in and this girl comes up to me and says “Hello, I’m Lily and I am the Welcome committee.” She is all Getty and what not. I said “It’s the first day of school how is there a welcoming committee?” “It’s from the middle school.” “Oh well thanks I can find it on my own.” That was a huge lie though. I don’t even know where I am going. She can tell I was lying so she was introducing me to everyone, but when Lisa and Chris walked by she got quiet. I asked “Who’s that?” She had answered, “That is Lisa and Chris. They are dating, and following them are Lisa’s friends. They are the plastics. Claire and Chloe are their names.” As we walked down the hallway people stare at me. I get stared at like I’m a freak. When I get to the library I check my email and I see I have a new email. To: Kaitlyn Berowin From: Kyle Walker Subject: I miss you! Message: Dear Kaitlyu, We all miss you here and we think you need to come back. I am at school right now in first period. I just found out you would have been in every class of mine. Please come home! I hope you love it there though. I am applying for next year to go there if you like it there. I will work my tail off so I can get in and be with you. I wish you were here. I guess I am going to be fine. I am going to LA for this school trip soon so I will be going to visit you! I get to see the best thing that has ever happened to me. I am emailing you from the schools computer. Man Newberry sucks so much. Over at Oak View I heard people got arrested at a Flipping middle school. Some people here are getting searched for drugs. I am getting searched too. Crap I have to go hide my stash now. Just kidding but everyone gets searched so far five people got busted! One was Bailyn. Can you believe it? Ever since her dad died she started to turn her life around. My mom wants me to go talk to her about it. Maybe that will help, hey you need to email her that might help too! Love, Kyle It felt great to get an email from him. I just cannot believe Bailyn. She would never do that. Not the Bailyn I knew. I really wish I could go and get her to come here and change. I turn on my TV and the stupid news is on. As I look for the remote (because with my luck it’s missing) I hear the news anchor say “Young teenager arrested in Newberry, Florida, Bailyn White...” I turn back and my mouth drops. I call Bailyn, No answer. She’s gone, she’s in Jail. I look at the news for more information. “She tried to steal clothes, shoes, watches and cigarettes.” I didn’t know she smoked. Kyle called me “Hey Kyle!” “Hey you are not going to believe this!” “What is it?” “Bailyn got arrested for shoplifting. She called me and told me, she was also arrested for having drugs.” “Will she get out soon?” “Not sure yet she will be in there for a few days though.” “That sucks, tell me when she gets out so I can call her.” “Okay I will, hey I got to go to class bye.” We got off the phone. A few days later I see on the news that Bailyn is out of jail and is back at school. I wish the old Bailyn was back, I really do. She would never get into trouble, but now she does. We were best friends; I don’t know what had happened to Bailyn. I keep trying to call, no answer still. I call her parents and talk to them; they told me that Bailyn will be in Jail for a few days. Her freshman Year she gets arrested. I go on the school website and sign up. Right after I make my account I get a friend request from a Tabitha Flowers. I accept it. I update my profile and get a TON of friend requests. I was shocked that every person wants to be my friend. I am brand new; I don’t know anyone at all. As I get up from my computer I get a drink of soda and go sit down again. Tabitha messages me. Tabitha Flowers: Hey! You are that new girl right? Kaitlyn Berowin: Yeah, I really am lost ha-ha I don’t know this school at all I came from a small town in Florida. Tabitha Flowers: Really? I am from Florida. Newberry, Florida. Kaitlyn Berowin: That is where I am from! I miss it so much. Tabitha Flowers: Me too, it was really fun, wait I was in your kindergarten class. Kaitlyn Berowin: Oh yeah we were best friends when we were little. Tabitha Flowers: Yeah tell your parents I say hey, I have to go bye.   Chapter Two: As I get off I look through my pictures from when I was little. There I saw two short girls one with brown wavy hair and one with blonde curly hair. I noticed it was Tabitha. I looked at the back of the picture where it says “Kaitlyn and Tabitha first day of Kindergarten!” We were best friends. I still cannot believe she remembered me after all those years. We were so close and I thought she dropped off the face of the earth. What a best friend I am. Tabitha Still remembered all our memories we had before she moved. Now that I live here (not even knowing she was living here) we can hang out. I go down stairs and call Tabitha. I hear someone say “Hello.” I said “Hey is Tabitha there?” “This is she, who is this?” “Oh hey it’s Kaitlyn.” “Oh hey!” “Want to hang out today? Where do you live so I know?” “Okay, I live in L.A. Evergreen, how about you?” “That’s where I live!” “So your family is the new family that moved in!” “Yeah, I live next door! Go outside.” All I hear is an extremely loud dial tone. I go outside and I find Tabitha waiting for me. She comes up to me and says “Hey! We are once again neighbors!” So we head inside my house when my parents pound us with a million questions of how we got back in touch. We explain the whole Situation. My parents invited Tabitha to spend the night and of course she couldn’t say no. My parents invited the Flowers Family to come over and cook s’mores like we used to when I was younger. They came over and stayed till Midnight. When Tabitha and I went in my room we went on the school’s website. The website was www.LAHS.com. When Tabitha and I logged on there was a geek that messaged us. Nick Share: HEY! Kaitlyn Berowin: Hey? Nick Share: Would you or Tabitha go out with me? Tabitha Flowers: I’m sorry but No thanks and Kaitlyn has a boyfriend so bye! Tabitha Flowers has left this group conversation. Nick Share: Oh ok well it was worth a shot for Tabitha to go out with me I am in love with her. Kaitlyn Berowin: Oh ok well sorry but bye. I logged off and so did Tabitha. We stayed up so late and got hyper off of candy. This was the first step of being best friends again. Our families were the best of friends, until they moved. Tabitha says, “Isn’t it a convenient that we were best friends until I moved then you moved here to a few years later?” I agreed with her on that. When we finally fell asleep it was around three AM. We slept for eight short hours. We didn’t expect us to wake up at nine. We get on the computer to check my email. My computer said “no new emails.” I was hoping I log on and hear a voice say “You’ve got Mail!” Kyle still hasn’t answered my email. I leave my laptop on for the longest time. No emails. My mom calls us down for breakfast. She made us chocolate chip pancakes with milk. It was Delicious! My mom is the best cook! She is so awesome at cooking. Tabitha was so amazed by my mom’s cooking that she asked if my mom can make her some pancakes to go so she can bring them home. So my mom had of course shrieked “Yes! Of course!” my mom loves cooking so she couldn’t say no. My mom always babbles about how she loves cooking. Tabitha left around noon. I cleaned up our mess upstairs in my extremely lavish room. I founder Tabitha’s Laptop she had left in my room. So I brought her laptop to her. She was so grateful that I brought it. My other neighbors brought us some cookies to say “Welcome to the neighborhood!” It felt amazing to be wanted in the neighborhood by people I didn’t even know. By the end of the day we had about ten thousand cookies in our house. My dad took some to work, I took some to school and my mom took some to the homeless shelter to feed the poor while we kept the rest. Everyone knew that Tabitha and I got really close already even though we had just met. Yes, there is Lilly, but Tabitha is such a better friend than her. I can just see it right now. As I walk into school with my hands filled with cookies, books and my backpack filled to the top with books and even more cookies on my back, I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket where it tickles can’t even reach it so I start laughing crazily while everyone is staring and laughing at the new girl who starts busting out laughing and can’t even help it. While everyone is staring at me I start putting everything on the first table I get to. I hand out cookies to my friends then I take some to the people who pass by and were laughing at me. Lisa made it clear she didn’t want any by saying, “What are you just trying to bribe us so everyone will like you? Well I am not taking any I don’t eat carbs, plus you’re new!” I had explained “Well actually we didn’t make any of them; a lot of my neighbors brought them for us since we are new.” She just walked off while I walked the other direction and that was to the kids who don’t have a lot of friends. I gave them a few and then walked to Lilly, I gave her one. After that I felt I should go up to Chris see if he wanted any. I can tell he did want some, but Lisa was around and she told him to not even go near me because I might have a fatal disease. Well I am not the one with the disease. She has the self-centered disease you can totally tell. No one really liked her anyway, they just liked her stuff. No one likes the new girl ever. Lisa’s dad owned the mall so she bribed people by giving discounts on things that they would like. After passing cookies out to my friends and the geeks, I gave some to my teachers. I brought fifty cookies and I only gave ten out because of Lisa. So I gave everyone who wanted one even more than I should have. When I got to first period, which was Math, I couldn’t find my homework because all the containers of cookies. I gave one full container to my math teacher. Mrs. Dooms was my math teacher who let me give her my homework after she collected it. I finally found my homework ten minutes later. Lisa was laughing at me because I couldn’t find it. When Mrs. Dooms collected it she said she didn’t even do it because grades don’t matter. She thinks she will get a scholarship to College by looks. Wow she is a really big idiot. As I listen to Mrs. Dooms I smell Nail Polish. I whisper to myself, “Nail Polish?” Mrs. Dooms says, “Yes Ms. Berowin?” “Oh sorry for interrupting.” As she finishes teaching, I look back to see what the smell is and it is Lisa Painting her nails a really hot pink to match her hot pink skirt and her white blouse over her pink tank top. Oh look designer shows too. She carried her pink bedazzled purse everywhere she went. She even named it Pretty N’ Pink. I have no idea why though. When I look toward to the board I see Lisa’s name on the board under the detention list. I start laughing but trying to hold it in as long as I can. The bell rang and a crowd of people fled into the hallways from every door opening here. All I can here are people screaming. I get pushed, and then shoved. I couldn’t find any of my friends. Not one in sight. I squeeze my way to my locker and get my books. I grabbed my English book when someone pushed me into my locker and made me bump my head so I hard I was as knocked out as my grandfather on Thanksgiving. As I lie there, Tabitha walks out of English to go get a drink of water. She sees me lying down in the hall with my locker wide open and my English book in my hand. Tabitha starts to scream, “HELP!” as Mrs. White comes out to see what is going on. When she sees me unconscious on the ground she takes me to the school nurse. The school nurse says “What happened here?” Tabitha has no answer. Tabitha is really good at putting things together. Tabitha says “Well I am guessing she got her head banged on her locker then when she had fallen, her head banged on the floor.” They tell Tabitha to go back to class so on her way back she passes by where I fell and sees blood on the hard, cold granite ground. She goes back into class and starts getting to work. After she had finished her work she went back to the nurse while she sees my lying there on the bed with bandages on my head where I was bleeding. The nurse called my parents to pick me up from the hospital. She had called the ambulance to take me there. Of course Tabitha came in the red and white Ambulance. All of a sudden you here sirens coming out of nowhere. I know everyone is staring out the windows while I get loaded on the long, strong, yellow and black stretcher. My parents appear when I wake up. My mom says “well good morning sleepy head!” I have no idea what is going on. I have no idea where I am, who I’m with or anything. As I ask all these questions I find out all this information. A few long days later I come back to school with my memory well in tact just like it used to be. As I walk into school everyone is staring at me laughing and pointing. I try to ignore it the best I can, but it isn’t working. I try my best to ignore it and focus on getting to my locker and remembering my combination. When I get to the hallway where I stare at my locker and where there I see the blood stains Tabitha told me about. As I walk into math class I get a text from Kyle. The text said “Hey how are you I heard you got a concussion at school!” I didn’t text back because after that I get a text from Bailyn that said “Hey sorry I couldn’t talk I have been in jail, but I have major news for you, Kyle’s CHEATING on you!” I read that text and started crying. I got taken out of first period to find out who caused my injury. After I had identified the guy he got expelled. I ran to the bathroom broke into tears and stared at that text. I got another text soon after, it was a picture of Kyle Kissing someone else. My heart had shattered and was all over the bathroom. Of course with my luck Lisa walks in while I am busting out in tears. She just stared at me sitting on the ground in tears. She asks “what are you doing?” I answered her question “Nothing I just am thinking.” “About what, about how you got Jason expelled!” I walked out of the bathroom with my face all red and eyes watering. The bell rang and I started walking to English. A few minutes into class I raise my hand and ask to go to the nurse to change my bandage changed. The doctor said I will be able to feel when it needs changed. As I walked into the office people stare at me because they see all the blood leaking out of my head. We had to put three layers of bandages on my head plus the stitches. When I got home my neighbors brought brownies instead of cookies this time. When Jason got expelled he moved into my neighborhood for a fresh new start. I sat on my porch doing homework and writing in my journal. He sees me on my porch and you can hear screaming coming from down the street. His mom told him to come tell me he is sorry and to talk it out with me. I know it was an accident. My parents hate him now because this was life threatening. When the doctors told my parents that, we had thanked god for giving me a chance to live. After he came to talk to me I went inside to go and dig out old memories of me and Kyle. I can’t stop thinking about him. He cheated. I don’t know him anymore. I get on my computer to find Bailyn on, wow didn’t expect that. What her parents didn’t ground her. They should, she just got out of jail. I text Kyle back and say “Hey Kyle, I have one thing to say, that is thanks for cheating on me, we are over!” It broke my heart to have to say that to him. I thought we would be together forever. Now I know never to have a long distance relationship again. Long distance relationships work well for some people, but for me it didn’t even work. I don’t get why I actually believed it would be like a beautiful fantasy that every girl dreams about. It is like the fantasy girls have about their weddings. They find the most perfect place they will want to have it at when they get married, have the perfect dress picked out and everything you would imagine. We dream about every small little detail. Like what we eat the night before or what we wear the night before. We girls are crazy when it comes to fantasies. Kyle finally texted me back and was acting so confused he called me to ask about what I was talking about. I answered in an angry way saying “Hello.” He said “Hey what in the world are you talking about?” “I received a picture see.” I sent the picture to him. When he got it and looked he had hung up on me. He realized he lost the best thing that has ever happened to him. My mom saw me crying and came to talk to me. I had no choice but to tell her about Kyle. My mom tried her best to comfort me without bumping my head. She didn’t do too well. By the time she was done her shirt was covered in blood and I needed new bandages. Tabitha was right there with me. I get online to see Kyle’s status which says “Getting on flight 51A to Los Angeles.” My mouth dropped I couldn’t even comment on it I was so shocked. I got offline, got a nice warm long shower and went to bed. I woke up the next morning to find Kyle on my door step. When I opened the door he kissed me. The kiss was amazing but I stopped it. He was a dirty cheater that I don’t want anything to do with. When I found out he was staying here for a while I also found out he was going to my school. So when I couldn’t find Tabitha I walked into school to find Kyle kissing Tabitha. Tabitha pushed him away and said “GET OFF OF ME!” She sees me standing there watching. I give them a look and run off. I was gone by the time she could get to me. I was nowhere to be found after that. I ran all the way home to find my parents at home. I walk in and say “I’m home!” My dad works till five what is he doing home at eight a.m. I ask why he’s home so early, they ask me the same question. I told them the whole story. They told me I can stay home but I will have to go tomorrow and tell people I felt sick or my head was hurting. After school ended I hear the doorbell so I go and answer the door. I open it up very slowly. Of course it is Tabitha. I Say “What do you want?” “I didn’t do anything, he kissed me first!” “I don’t want to talk about it!” I slam the door in her face and tell her to get lost. I tried to be as nice as I could to her, but she made me so angry! Who steals their best friend’s boyfriend? Should I talk to them? I honestly don’t think I should. I thought I was in love with Kyle until I saw him cheating. Now I have no idea what to think. What should I think? I am so embarrassed to go back to school. This school year stinks so much. I am very scared to even go to school that I will bump my head. Later that day I go and get ready for bed. When I finally fell asleep I was out like a light. I woke up around six thirty a.m. to get ready for school. I walked into school and everyone stares more than usual. I go straight to my locker, When I close my locker I see Kyle standing there trying to apologize. I walk away from him but he keeps following me and I cannot get away from him. He is stalking me I can totally tell. I turn around and say “STOP FOLLOWING ME!” Everyone stops and stares at me. Dean Allen calls us to the office to talk it out. Holy crap my heart is beating so fast I can’t even hear myself think. All I hear is thump, thump. I can’t even hear Dean Allen talk. That is not good; I can tell he is trying to ask me why I was yelling. I wasn’t so sure he was asking that though. I asked “Can you repeat that?” So he repeated it, he said “What was all the commotion about in the hallway?” “He will not stop following me everywhere I look he is everywhere I look and I am so tired of it.” Dean Allen says “Maybe you need to take a break from each other. Do you think I should suspend one of you?” I say “If you suspend someone it should be him for stalking me.” I am so mad I think he got me in trouble. I give him a look. I felt like I was going to kill him for that. Dean Allen decided to call our parents. I honestly do not think I should be getting my parents called. My mom answered so I was nervous to see what she will think of this. I am so tired of all this drama at this school. I am thinking about changing schools even though I worked so hard to get into this school. I don’t want Kyle here! I thought life would be better when Kyle went here. I know for a fact Kyle has changed and I want the old Kyle back. I went to talk to Kyle all alone. “Kyle we need to talk. You have changed and I am tired of it. I want the old Kyle back, the Kyle I loved. Please bring him back.” “Look I am sorry but I am the same me.” “Oh so the same Kyle cheats on his girlfriend. Good to know.” “No not that one, that was an accident I didn’t mean it, I love you!” “It’s a little late now. Good-bye Kyle it’s officially over!” It hurt so much to say that to him. As I walked away I looked back at him and I see him crying in a distance. I stop and stare. I think to myself, “Did I do that to him?” I felt like a witch who had broken someone’s heart in half. But my heart felt like it was broken in half when Kyle cheated. The next few months were as long as five years put together. I didn’t speak to Tabitha and Kyle for six months. I would see them in the hallway and I’d walk away. I am still shocked Kyle got into LAHS. As I walked into math class on Thursday I accidently ran into a cute guy. I apologized after we were staring into each other’s eyes for ten seconds. He apologized as well. He had that country voice I can tell he was from the south. “I’m Kailtyn”; “I’m Brandon.” “Nice to meet you, I love your accent, where are you from?” “I’m from Austin, Texas, what about you?” “I’m from Newberry, Florida.” He and I talked until the bell rang. Brandon had given me his number and told me to call or text him. I gave him mine and told him the same exact thing. During fifth period I got a text from him saying “Hey! I am so bored talk to me!” I replied, “Me too!” But I looked up and Mrs. Thomas was standing right there and told us if we took our phones out again she would take them. We laughed when she turned around and walked away. Chapter Three I wake up on Saturday Morning half asleep thinking I was late for school. I get up out of bed, brush my teeth, get dressed, do my hair and run to school. Since I’m a freshman I am only fifteen years old so I get my license next year. Brandon and I were talking and when I got to school he was standing there staring at me. He starts walking toward me slowly. I stand there not knowing what to do. Should I stand there or walk to him? He finally gets to me and kisses me. I smile, when Kyle appears out of nowhere with an angry look on his backstabbing face. Is he mad at me? When he pulls I knife out and he stabbed Brandon. I knew I am next when he takes the knife to me kisses me then stabs me. I wake up screaming, oh it was a dream. That was a vivid dream I had to write down so I can tell Tabitha. Then I remember Tabitha and I aren’t friends anymore. Her online status is “Please be my friend again!” I know she is talking about me. She would laugh at my dream. That’s what we do, we laugh at each other’s dreams. We have a journal filled with our dreams we want to remember. We have them in the same notebook. My door bell rings. I go answer it there is Tabitha standing right now standing at me trying to apologize. I do not accept. I try to close the door but she stops it with her body. “Please forgive me! I didn’t mean to, you know that. He kissed me; I would never betray my best friend Kaitlyn, please!” I try not to cry. I feel wet tears coming down my cheek. “I know, but I feel like I can’t trust you anymore. You kissed my boyfriend. Now I am single but I feel kind of happier now.” “I know, he leaves for Florida tomorrow. Go to the airport and forgive him. Get a good-bye kiss they do in the movies.” “I don’t like him anymore. I like someone else.” “Who is it?” “His Name is Brandon.” She gives me this look, but then she knew who I was talking about. Her mouth dropped so fast. “He’s so cute, you guys should go out. He likes you. I have known him for a long time, he said he liked a girl named Kaitlyn I didn’t know it was you.” Since we were getting alone I let her in showed her the journal of my latest dreams and she glued the ones she did while we were fighting. She still knew to write them down just like what I did. Finally it was Sunday at ten A.m. Where I get a taxi to LAX and find Kyle waiting in line. “I was waiting for you, I am really sorry; please forgive me I lost the best thing that ever happened to me.” I look at him and say “I only want to be your friend nothing more than best friends.” “I know I am sorry.” The announcer said “Flight A42 to Florida now boarding.” “Well I guess that’s me.” Kyle said. I hug him good-bye and kissed his cheek. As I watched him board the plane he looks back at me and waves. When I look away I see I was all alone. I looked back and Kyle was gone. I went back to catch another taxi. It happened to be the same taxi driver I had before. I finally got home and paid the taxi driver. As I walk up to my porch I see Brandon sitting on my porch swing. I say “Brandon? What are you doing here?” “Well I was at home thinking about someone I really like but I didn’t know how she felt about me. I wanted to ask her something.” “What do you want to ask her?” My heart is pounding so fast I can’t even hear myself think.” “Kaitlyn, will you go out with me this Friday?” “Yes! I would be honored to go out with you.” I was so excited he asked me out. He had to go. I went upstairs to find a note in my room. The note was in an envelope that was addressed to me. I tried to open it but I couldn’t get it opened. When I finally got it opened all I saw was a card that read “Happy Birthday Kaitlyn! We love you! Love Grandma and Grandpa.” They remembered about my sixteenth birthday. Then the doorbell rang. I go and answer it. The CDA was here. I thought it was a new kind of UPS when the guy said “Delivery for Kaitlyn Berowin.” I signed for it and looked outside. It was a brand new car. I asked who the Guy was and he said “CDA.” “What’s CDA?” “Car Dealers of America.” My grandparents sent me a new car for my birthday. I turn around and they are behind me. I scream and hug them. I couldn’t believe they were here. I went to bed that night thinking of what tomorrow will be like. When I woke up my family crowded me and screamed “HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” My mom was holding Breakfast in Bed, My dad was holding one present, my grandma was holding a crown and a sash, and my grandpa was holding my license certificate from the DMV. All I need to do is go and get my picture taken and it’s all done. After I ate, I opened the present. It was a new outfit I was going to wear today. It was a pair of boots, a pair of skinny jeans and a strapless top. I wore that to school with the sash and crown. I walked down the hall with people staring at me and Tabitha standing next to me. Suddenly I feel someone grab my hand. It was Brandon. The cute blonde, with muscles I call my boyfriend. I smiled at him and see him holding a present and so is Tabitha. I say “Tabitha were you holding that the whole time and Brandon how did you know it was my birthday?” Tabitha says, “No I told him to bring it for me so you wouldn’t know I had it.” Brandon’s answer to my question was “Tabitha told me when she asked me to hold it. When I sit down on the bench I open both presents. Brandon got me a necklace that says, “Kaitlyn” on it. Tabitha got me a brand new pair of shoes. Right when school ended I hopped in my mom’s RAV 4 and I drove us both to the DMV. I got my picture taken so fast. I looked at it and it looked Amazing. The old guy with the beard and the glasses handed me my license and I about flipped out. I drove us home to get into my new car and set it all up. I looked in the glove departments to find a gas card! My grandparents got me a blue RAV 4 just like my moms, but hers is black. I turn the engine on and drive off. I put my brand new designer purse on the passenger seat and I drive to the Coffee Café to meet Tabitha and Brandon. When I pull out of the neighborhood I see this line of cars to get to the mall. The mall is a few miles away so having to wait in a ten mile line to get into the mall. The problem is I am not going to the mall; I will have to pass it to get to Coffee Café. Tabitha calls me to ask me where I am, how did she get there so fast? I get out of line and drive back home. As I drive home I get a text from my mom. The text said, “Hey Stay out as late as you want, the earliest you come home is eight.” I was so confused why I get that text so I go to Tabitha’s house to see if she is hope yet. I don’t see any cars there so I drive the back way to the Coffee Café when I totally forgot about this way. When I pull up I see Brandon and Tabitha through the window. I park my car get out and walk up to the window. When I get their attention I go to the door walk in and sit by Brandon. “Hey do you mind staying with me all day since I can’t go home?” I say to them. Tabitha and Brandon both answer, “Sure.” I take out my laptop and open up Microsoft word and start to type. We have homework, which all three of us are partnered up. “Ok so what do we start with?” I ask. “Well what is the project?” Brandon asked. I go on the school website to find out. It says to write a story about five thousand words! When I told Brad and Tabitha, they weren’t too happy. We all didn’t know what to right about. The waitress came over and asked “Hello what can I get for you?” I said “Three Mocha Latté’s with extra whipped cream and chocolate syrup on top.” When she brought them over to us we had her put our names on them and we went back to work. We had a great idea of what to write about. They chose it. They want to write about my birthday. I don’t know why, but I said ok because it’s a topic. So we talk and type. We have all week to do this so why are we doing it today? We were gone all day and finally it’s eight. I walk in and it looks like no one is home. “Where is everyone?” The lights start to flicker. “Hello?” The lights turn on and everyone comes out and yells “SURPRISE!” I jumped because I didn’t expect that.” I went to the kitchen to thank my family for this amazing surprise birthday party. I felt something inside I had never felt before. It was an amazing feeling. I can’t even describe it. I go up to my room to go put my presents up after I opened them. As soon as I walk in I hear my laptop. Someone is trying to call me. I answer, it’s Bailyn! “Hey Bailyn!” “Happy Birthday Kaitlyn!” I was so excited to hear from her. I didn’t think she remembered my birthday after being in jail. When Bailyn had to go, I went into the living room to open presents. The first one I grabbed was from Tabitha. The card said “Happy Birthday! You were such an amazing friend when we were little and now we are best friends again! Love you like a sister! Love, Tabitha!” I opened the gift and there was a picture of us when we were little. It came with a frame that said “Best Friends for how long?” Then it came with our Kindergarten class project. I started crying because she went through all that trouble for me. After opening all my presents and everyone leaving I put everything in my room. I walk upstairs put my things in my room and start getting undressed for my shower when I hear a noise and find Brandon hiding in my closet. I screamed so loud China could hear it from here. I asked “What are you doing in here?” “I was going to surprise you and give you your birthday present.” I unwrap the box slowly, and then open it up to find a beautiful Necklace that says “Kaitlyn+Brandon=Forever.” “You had it personalized for me? That’s so sweet!” “Yeah it was the best thing that I could find for you.” “This must have cost you a fortune!” “It was worth it” I kiss him for two whole minutes! Friends Come and Go, But Family is always there Life is amazing when you thing about it. You have all these friends and all these people who care. Who care about you and not what you look like. I never expected this. It was the Unexpected. My life changes over night. My feelings change as I get older. I go to Tabitha's and find something I didnt want to find. I walk in to see her staring out the window in the dark. Died her hair black. Wore black clothes. "Tabitha? Is that you?" "Kaityln what are you doing here?" She asks so glum. you can tell in her voice and how she looks that she changed. "Tabitha, What happened to you?" "I am not me anymore, I am goth. Or as people say, Emo." Tabitha showed me her arm. I Scream on the top of my lungs, "YOU CUT YOURSELF! Why are you like this?" "My dad, he died." I couldn't get the words out exactly until I got the guts to say it. "How did he die?" "It was his time I guess." I watch her take out her dads rustly old pocket knife. Tabitha started cutting herself. "Tabitha I am sorry about your dad, but this is not the answer!" "You're right. I need to die. I need to kill myself." "NO! DO NOT KILL YOURSELF!" I cannot stand to see her like that. I said, "If you are going to be like this, I can't be friends with you!" I walked out. That was one of the hardest things I would have had to do in a while. I looked back at her. Then I walked out. I can not believe she is doing this! I walk up to my car put the key in the ignition, put my seatbelt on and drove off. I was so angry at Tabitha I couldn't even stop thinking about that. Tabitha didn't even try to stop me when I walked out. I was on my way to the coffee shop to meet Brandon. I texted Brandon when I was at a red light, "Meet me at the coffee shop! ASAP!" He texted back, "Okay I will be there in ten minutes." When the light turned green I stepped on the gas and a drunk driver comes out of nowhere. The drunk driver hits my car, pushes me into another car and causes this whole traffic jam. I am barely breathing. Trying to catch my breath I can't keep my eyes open any longer I close them. My family is worried. Brandon is worried. The doctor had told my parents and Brandon I might not make it. Today might be my last day. They all waited by my side listening to the beeps. Watching me sleep. I might not even wake up. I never got to say I love you to Brandon for the last time. I never got to be myself. My eyes open slowly while everyone is praying around me hoping I wake up. Everyone puts their heads up high enough to see my eyes open. I struggle to breathe still. I can't get these works out. Trying and trying to talk. But Cant. I look down at my hand and see an IV in. I look around slowly. All I see are Brandon and my parents. I keep trying to get these words out, but I can't even breathe enough. I tell myself to Breathe in and out. In and out. My mom calls the doctor in to ask why I am not even talking. Am I deaf or something? Did I die while I was asleep? Brandon is the first one to talk, "Kaitlyn? Can you here me? I love you!" I shake my head yes while my dad gives Brandon the "What did you just say to my daughter" look. I close my eyes right before the doctor comes in. I am asleep again. The doctor notices my breathing is not right. She takes me to surgery right away. The waiting room is full of people. Tabitha didn't even show. The police were there waiting for me. Waiting for me to tell my side of the story. I am the one in the worst condition. The drunk driver was caught. He is now facing jail time. I get out of surgery and sleep. I wake up to find a breathing tube in my throat. Not helping. I struggle to catch my breath. I am alone. The doctor told everyone no visitors. My respitory theropist comes to help with my breathing. I am worried I might not make it. The respitory theropist says "Hello Kaitlyn, I'm Jane your respitory theropist. I am sorry to say-" I worry to hear this. I don't want to here this. "You might not make it. If you do, you will need breathing treatments more than once a day." A week later I get the tub out of my throat so I can finally talk. The doctor gave me a button so if I can't breathe, to push it. I can barely talk, but I do. I whisper, "Mom, is it true? I might not make it?" My mom tells me the truth, "You might not make it honey. we love you so much. We need you, stay with us!" I take a sip of my water. I take a small sip. When Brandon comes in he says to me, "Hey babe, I love you! Don't leave me!" I try to tell him the best I could, "I love you too! I want to stay!" I do my school work in the hospital. I get my teacher to come help me. I have to stay in the hospital for over like one month or more. When ever my doctor thinks I am ready. I get a visitor later on the day my teacher came for the first time. The visitor was the drunk driver. "Hello, you must be Kaitlyn, I am sorry!" "I am short of breath and try to say, "I might not live. I can barely breathe." I lost so much breath, I can't breathe at all. I push the button. I start to close my eye. My heart is stopping. This was unexpected. There is a long Beep coming from my room. My parents and Brandon had gone to get food when I had stopped breathing. The drunk driver saw that and left my room. The doctors tried to shock me. Nothing. I was be taken to an emergency surgery. My parents and Brandon came back to my room when the doctor came in after the surgery. I lie on a hospital bed in the operating room. "Hello, Kaitlyn's heart stopped. We took her to surgery. We put a tube in her throat again. She can't talk. She will be in here soon. We lost her for ten to twenty mintues. We got her. She is breathing, but barely." Everyone prays. I pass by the waiting room. I see my Florida friends. They see me with the tube. A few months later, I go home with all this breathing stuff. When I finally get the okay to drive my car will be fixed. Walking to the front door with all my stuff Tabitha stares out the window like she did the day I came over. I always new certain friends won't always be there for you.Tabitha was a great friend. She went down the wrong road. Tabitha was arrested while I was in the hosptial. She was caught with weed. I never expected that, that was unexpected. When I got home from the hospital and I saw her sitting at the window, I noticed that our friendship was over. The Move My parents fighting all the time. Ever since the accident my house has been like war. I can't get peace in this house, but I can't even leave this house because I am in bad shape. I have nowhere to go. My life will never be the same. I listen to my parents fighting. As soon as it is quiet, my parents come to my room. My mom looks into my eyes and says, "Kaitlyn, honey, I know you are tired of your dad and I fighting. It doesn't look like it is getting any better, we are getting a divorce." The word Divorce makes my heart ache. My parents were the perfect couple until my accident. My dad looks at me intensly and says to me, "You will be moving in with me. I will be moving back to Newberry." I yell at him so hard it hurts! "WHAT! WHY? I CAN'T LEAVE! I GOT INTO THE BEST SCHOOL IN THE COUNTRY!" When I yelled "WHAt", IT hurt so bad, then I ended up not being able to talk for a day. My parents had told me I will be leaving next week. I will meet my dad there. My dad has a week to find a house. I text Brandon and tell him everything. As I start to pack everything I come across a picture of Tabitha and I. Our friendship is over, why do I still have this? I put it in a box. I put it in the box for keeps and I don't even know why. I couldn't get myself to throw it away. A week later Brandon and I say good-bye. I go to LAX and fly all the way to the Orlando, Florida Airport. When I get off the long sleepless plane ride I see my dad standing there. I grab my stuff and go to the car. I slamed the door as hard as a frozen carmel apple in antaritca in the window. We had a three hour long quiet ride to our new house. When we get home I notice the house I will live at is my old house where I use to wake up every morning to my mom's homemade pancakes. I will not smell those pancakes again. Not in this house. I walk in the house where I see Kyle standing there with flowers and chocolate. Am I still with Brandon? I text him asking if this long distance will work. When he texts back he said, "No I really don't think so, I love you to death! I will always love you! I think we should be over though." I said the same thing to him. When Kyle saw me he said, "KAITLYN! I have missed you!" I just stare. How did he know? What will happen now?? I hate the unexpected. I miss Brandon so much I wish he was here with me. Brandon is still in LA though. Never will he be in Newberry. I never even told Tabitha I was moving. The last time I saw her she was staring out her window. When I unpack my breathing treatment I start my breathing exercises. I look off my balcony when I am done to find my anitials in the tree. When I am in better condition I am going to climb the tree to find out what else is up there. Something moves in my closet. I walk slowly to the closet door. When I get there and open the door up,I scream. "AHHHHHH" I lost my Breath after that scream. Room 312 My dad runs upstairs after he hears me scream. He grabs the phone and dails 911. All along I knew this was a bad idea. I woke up in the hospital with a breathing mask on. Right next to me are my parents and Brandon. Why are my mom and Brandon here? I close my eyes for a minute then open my eyes again. They were gone. I just imagined them. But I know I am not imagining Kyle walking in the hospital room door. Room 312. I really want to talk so bad, but I can't. I wish this would all change. I wish everything was back to normal. I noticed back at the hospital in Los Angeles I was in room 312 as well. My adress always had 312 in it. What is with the number 312? Kyle brought me a magazine called 312. Why is everything 312 now? Was room 312 haunted or something? Something is linking me to Room 312. When I got home a week later I asked my dad, "Hey dad, what room was I born in?" It took my dad a mintue to answer. He answered, "Room 312." My mouth dropped. I needed to do more reseach on the subject Room 312. When I got home I see The spot I was found on the ground. I check my closet out but I find nothing. I started to climb the tree outside on my balcony where I found "Kaitlyn and Kyle are Best Friends Forever!" Carved into the tree. Right under it is the date. "March 1,1997". I see all this stuff from Kyle and I. Then I found some from me and Bailyn. At that time I noticed I haven't told Bailyn I was back. Has Kyle already told her and she is in jail again? I call Bailyn's phone. No answer. I text her, No answer. After that I call her house phone and her mom picks up from the phone. "Hello." "Hey this is Kaitlyn, is Bailyn there?" "Oh Kaitlyn, Hi I haven't heard from you in a while. But no, Bailyn was arrested last night for possession." I thought to myself, Of course. I reply back, "oh, I am sorry, but I got to go bye." I put the phone down. I went down off the tree to my room. I looked at my photo album of Bailyn and I. Such a good kid too. Then I relized I need to go down there. I drove my car all the way to the Gainsville County Jail. I waited for Bailyn to come out with a cop holding her and silver handcuffs keeping her hands together. When she came out and saw me her eyes got wide and sat down. "Hey Bailyn, what happened?" "I got arrested for possession and this was not the first time." "I heard before. But What jail cell number are you in?" "312 Why?" I paused and thought of every room number that has 312 in it. I am confused more than ever at this point. But Why the number 312? The Healing of all Parts of Me Healing? Is that even a choice for me? I want to know how I can stop with all these breathing treatments. Coughing all the time really stinks. Since i'm back home and my mom is so far away, who am I going to talk to about boys or any problems I would have? I miss my old life. All my friends are gone and all I have is myself. I email my friends, no emails back. I look everyday for emails, texts, calls, and I am stupid enough to check the mail. Why am I even trying? They probably forgot about me. You find out who your real friends are as you get older. I want to go back to Los Angeles though. I can't stand it in this little town called Newberry. I want to go back to where my mom is. I can heal every part of me there. I know where I belong when I am there. I just hope I can leave here to go back. I got into the bset High School in the United States and I had to leave. That school looks good on all Applications to everywhere. I feel like I am not good enough to fit in anywhere else. My dad comes into my room as I am taking my medicine so I can finally heal. my dad says, "I know you are upset here, but when you get the okay from your doctor, you are going back to L.A. Your mom called the school and they are ready for you to come back." I could not wait for that. I finish my breathing treatments and sit in the old tree house where everything is calm and I do no have to worry about anything but being where I actually belong. I was about to start packing the tree house first, when I saw the floor board popping up. I lift the floor board up as I see my old photos I put up here before I moved. Nobody even touched them ever. I start to cry as I read the old newspaper clippings over me and see my family so happy. Why do I even try to be happy again? As I start to pack up the old newspaper clippings and the old photos I get a call from Kyle. I ignore the call and keep packing my stuff I am taking. I left alot of my stuff to be here at my dads and I still have some things at my moms. I took the essentials with me. Between the next few days, all I did was pack. On Friday, my dad drove me to the airport where I had a one-way ticket to Los Angles, California. Being in the car with my dad was pretty boring. I put in my earplugs for my IPOD when my dad decides to talk. All I hear is Music from the pink zebra headphones sticking out of my ears. My dad doesn't even know I am not listening when he turns to me and says, "I am going to miss you, I love you Kaitie, I hope you keep in touch." All I heard was the "uch" We pull up and I say good-bye to my dad. He was the only one that has ever called me Kaitie. As I grew up, that was all he called me. So as I board the plane I look out the window and see him in the window standing there waving at me balling his eyes out. I know he is upset. I just cannot help it. To think I am hurting my dad so much just to get the best for me. I hope he something to make him happy. As I am thinking of how much I am hurting my dad, I see an elderly guy staring at me in a way you couldn't imagine. I cannot even stand this ride already. I thought I was lucky to be on the plane sitting all by myself in the plane seat. The old guy trys to come sit by me where I am getting completly grossed out I yell, "When will we be in Los Angles?" But we are just lifting off now. I try to get someone who works on the plane to keep the man in his seat because he is creeping me out. I can see him staring at me out of the corner of my eye. I turn on my IPOD and start listening to music. All I can here is my dad calling me Kaitie. I am having Doubts of moving. I really wish I was not though. I finally fall asleep. I wake up when we have five minutes until we land and I see the creepy man sitting right next to me! I say "Please leave me alone!" He is hitting on me! I refuse to even talk to him anymore. The plan lands and I run off the plane so fast I left tracks. As I get my bags and I look for my ride, my mom is not here. I look at my phone and the screen said "No New Messages" I call and text my mom, but no reply. I find a bench to sit on. I wait and wait for my mom. The guy from the plane is looking for me so I sheild my face. I cannot find my mom anywhere. I call everyone and nobody has seen her. Where is she? Lost I am lost. My mom is gone. I get ahold of one my neighbors who were shocked to hear from me, but has not even heard or seen from my mom. Fear runs through my veins as I have the feeling something is wrong. I call my dad. "Dad, I landed, but there is a problem." "Kaitie. what's the matter? What happened?" "It's mom, she has not arrived and she is never late. I have a feeling something happened." The line went dead. Did he hang up? Where is my mom? I need her so much. I look at my phone and see Tabitha's number. I text her "Have you seen my mom?" That was the first time I have talked to her since the fight. She answers, "No why? Aren't you with your dad in Newberry?" "I am here to live with my mom and go to LAHS, but I cannot find her and she was suppose to pick me up from the airport." "I will be there to pick you up, LAX right?" "Yeah, we need to talk." "Yes we do, I miss hanging out with you Kaitlyn!" I didn't answer until I got a text saying, "I am out front." I go out there to find Tabitha. She puts my stuff in the trunk of her car. We drive down the high way and talk about all the good old times and how amazing it was for me when I lived there. Tabitha says, "I missed you when you were gone, you didn't tell me you were leaving, why?" "We were in that fight, I didn't think you cared about me anymore. I didn't think we'd talk ever again. I didn't even think I would be back here. I love it here. I am glad to be back." "I am glad you are back, you look different, I will help you find your mom, she is somewhere close, she couldn't have gotten far." "It isn't like her to something like this, somethings wrong, i just know it! She didn't even answer my texts or calls!" I keep trying to get a hold of my mom but no answer. I get more nervous and more afraid as minutes pass. out of nowhere, it starts to poor down raining. "What the heck!" I yell. "It was suppose to be clear skys, not pooring down rain!" Answers Tabitha. Something is wrong I think. Then out of nowhere, starts thundering and lightening outside. Then, we get a tire blown and swirve of the side of the road. "AHHHHH!" Screams Tabitha. I didn't know what to do. Nobody else is on the road. We are lost. No way out. "I have no service!" I scream to Tabitha to get over the thunder and lightening. Scared to death, we try to get service. We are stuck in the middle of nowhere. Pitch black and hearing wolfs attacking animals. Something comes to the window of the car and makes us scream on the top of our lungs. The window breaks. The wolf starts to attack. I try to get out of the car, but of course the wolf is on my side. Tabitha gets out and trys to pull me out by my arms as the wolf has my legs. I scream in pain, "Tabitha! Help! Help! Help!" Blood everywhere. I cannot breathe. Losing all my breath and screaming so loud I am losing my voice. Suddenly I can feel my eyes closing as I am in terror struggling for my life. "Tabitha, leave me and run. Im dying as it is just go and save youse-" my eyes close and I stop breathing. The Struggle I struggled for life while Tabitha watches and tries to help. A truck passes and sees blood, a wolf, Tabitha and my body. Tabitha tries her best to get his attention. He stops and shoots the wolf. We finally get signal as the kind stanger calls 911 and helps keep as much blood in me as possible. Good thing he is a doctor. He tells Tabitha, "It looks like your friend might not be able to walk again. She will be lucky if she even lives." Tabitha looks down and prays I will be okay. She grabs my phone calls my dad and tells him about the accident. An hour after calling 911 an ambulance comes with lights flashing and a siren going off. Then a fire truck comes to help lift me into the ambulance. I struggle for my life as the kind doctor from the side of the road meets us at the hosptial to see how I am doing. Tabitha comes in the ambulance with me. My dad tries his best to get here as fast as he could. But he is all the way in Florida. Tabitha's family meets us at the hosptial and tries to get a hold of my mom. I am afraid she is gone. Tabitha calls Brandon and tells him about me. I wasn't even here a day. Not even an hour and I am struggling for my life. Brandon comes and watches me. Tabitha takes her parents car to my house and checks around for my mom. She finds this note on the kitchen counter. She didn't look at it. It was addressed to me and it was from my mom. She must had known something was going on. Tabitha brings it to the hosptial and waits for me to wake up. Brandon holds my hand kisses my forehead and prays. Pray for me I say in my mind. I am half dead and half alive. I can tell because my spirit came out of my body and I see my body. I see everything. Scared of what is going to happen. I panic. nobody can hear me scream or talk. I look at my body and Brandon. I listen to Brandon saying, "I love you so much! Please! Please come back! Kaitlyn! I miss you! Dont leave me!" And he is crying. Tears rush down his beautiful cheeks. The cheeks I kissed. I don't want to watch this anymore. I want to be there with him. Be alive and not half way dead. I don't want to hear the meter say im dead. I look through the window to see the doctor from the road as my doctor. His name is doctor John. Tabitha comes back and is holding a letter. She hasn't opened it. I try to give her a sign to open it. So I grab it and open it. Well my spirit does. I read it. It says, Dear Kaitlyn, If your reading this, I bet you are afraid. Afraid of why I didn't show up. I am sorry, something came up and I couldn't get a hold of you. Please ask Tabitha to stay with her until I get back. I don't have my phone. It is missing. Stolen actually. So I bet you tried to get a hold of me. Please, be careful. You can still get ahold of me. Just call or text this number. I had to get a new phone so call or text, 358-873-8888. Please, Stay here and don't go back to Florida with your dad because my boss decided to tell me now he needs me in New York. But get your stuff in the house and get unpacked. But you can stay with Tabitha if her parents say it's okay. I want you to stay close to home. So Please! Go to Tabitha's tell her mom to get a hold of me if she needs to. Thanks honey, again I am really sorry. Love, Mom So now I know I don't have to worry. Tabitha is now reading the letter. She calls my mom and tells her about the accident. She feels so guitly. They both do. I can feel my dying even more. Every second going by. I get faiter and faiter. I try to give Brandon a signal that I am here. I need him. He needs me. I don't get why life does this to me. Brandon's tear drips off his face and on one of my stiches.I felt it in my spirt as well. But I can still feel me dissapearing. I don't want to struggle anymore. I need my life more than ever. Today is Sunday and Tabitha goes to church to pray for me. I need all the prayers I can get. When Tabitha got back, Brandon went to church so he can have his turn to pray for me. My spirit followed him. He went up on the stage and asked for prayers. Soon enough, the whole church was praying. When church was over, we came back and waited for something to happen. My body was fighting for my life. But my body started to lose an the meter had told Brandon and Tabitha that I was dying. All we hear is a Stright Beep. My spirit was fading and leaving. I was gone. A place I like to Call Heaven White Fluffy clouds everywhere.Everyone is dressed in White.I got this crystal ball so I can look down at friends. There is this website I signed all my friends and family up. It logged them on right when they log on to the computer. It is the only way we can contact people who are still alive and they can contact us. I look up all the people who I see up here. A two year-old is here, her parents murdered her. Her name is Erin. Her story is amazing! I met someone my age, blonde hair, blue eyes, tall, skinny and looks to be like she was a cheerleader. Always peppy and is helping me out.Her name is Kayl and she gave me her chance to go home. She loves it here. She was killed instantly at her school by a student. I suffered. She feels so bad for me. I have two years to use these or I will be stuck here. I have to earn it. I find Brandon's name and email him. Dear Brandon, I miss you so much! I set you up for this account. This is me. I can prove it. Here is a picture of me up here. Everything is changed. I miss you guys. I met someone who is my age. She died at her school. A student shot her accidently when he was aiming for the teacher. I felt so bad. She knows I was suffering. She saw the whole thing. When I died. She thinks you are cute. I told her to stay away from my man. I want to see you in person. Kiss those lips one last time. I was there. My spirit was when I was in the hosptial. I was half dead and hald alive. I stood there. I felt your tears hit my stitches. I cried too. I suffered. I was in pain. Pain that you wouldn't believe. I still heart. Ever since I died. But not anywhere from the wolf, from the pain of not being able to see you again. That is tough. Promise me something, you will never forget me and never let them do anything with my body. I will be back soon and I want to be able to be back. It is getting late. Sleep Tight. I miss you! I love you! I will always Love you! Email me back soon or IM me when you get on. I will recieve every IM. Love, Kaitlyn Dear Tabitha, I miss you! It's Kaitlyn! I want to thank you, you tried to save me. The wolf, the wolf was to strong. I want you to be safe. I will always be here. If you ever need to talk. I read the note. The note from my mom. I read it right before you did. You know my spirit was there. Walking around right next to you and Brandon while I was in the hospital. Don't let anyone touch my body, or my room. Stay Safe. I will be back soon. I have two chances. I have until two years to come back. Please, believe me. Here is me right now. I just took that picture. I am up in Heaven. I am the only one that can access this account. Please IM me when you get on or Email me back! Please! I miss you! I will always be here if you need to talk. Just always remeber that. I get life changes. WE had plans. To go to college together. To have a double wedding and be eachothers brides maides. We had plans. I will always remember all these plans we had and I will never forget our lives together. Just remember I will be with you through every minute of everyday. Just because I am not there physically, doesn't mean I am not there at all. Go to my house. Grab my favorite and lucky necklace and keep it. I wish I could have given it to you myself. Stupid wolf! I just can never repay you for trying so hard to save my life. You risked your life. But in the end it ended like it should. Thanks so much. Love, Kaitlyn Dear Kaitlyn, Is it really you? The love of my life. Anyone can edit a picture and say they are Kaitlyn. If this is not Kaitlyn, I will hurt you. I loved her so much! She was the best and most wonderful girl I had ever known. I want to find that wolf. I want to kill that wolf. If this is Kaitlyn, I love and miss you! They will not touch your body if I have anything to do with it. I want to see you one last time. I want to kiss you and know if it will be our last kiss. I want to remember what is was like to be with you. I will always keep the pictures of us. Are you the only one that wants to come home? That is awful of how some people died. Tell me if you see my grandfather up there. Tell him I say hi. I pray for you everyday babe. Everyone tells me to give up on you. They say you will never come back. I want you back. Everyone else does too. Your parents are feeling guilty and are blaming themselves. They aren't even blaming the wolf anymore. Nobody expected a wolf to come out of nowhere in Los Angeles. Did you know your dad is probably moving back to Los Angeles? You never had a "get it while it is hot" family. I had that my whole life. Which means your parents don't have anymore children. You grew up as an only child. I have brothers and sisters. Please try to come home! Your mother just sobbs in a corner over you and I watch and watch. Cry and Cry. Come home babe! I love you and I always will. Forever and always! Love, Brandon The Time to Say Good-Bye "Am I ready to say good-bye to my old life?" I ask Kayla. Kayla answers, "Nobody is, but you will know when you are. When you are, you will not torchure your friends and family anymore. The thing is, when you communicate with them, you are torchuring them, they think they are dreaming. Dreaming they can talk to you again. Nobody wants to say good-bye, I wish the boy made better choices, I wish I said good-bye to friends and family. But with death, you don't say good-bye, you say hello to new standards and new ways where ever you end up. Try to go back if you really want to. You will not remember this at all. Well I was told you don't. You will go back, but life will be different. It might be best if you stay here and not go back. Start a family here. I am happy here. You can be too!" I try to take all the bad stuff out of what she said. I cannot run anymore. I have to try to figure it out. What's best for me? "If you die again, you will not end up here again, you will end up down under. I heard of the down under. You won't want to be there. You will love it here." She adds. All I can think about is if I am really ready to say good-bye and change who I am. I look down. I am torchuring them. Waiting and waiting. I find a solution for them to be happy. I am not going home. But I am going to say good-bye. I look down to Brandon. I go and say good-bye to him first. Crying as I say, "Brandon... It's me Kaitlyn. I came to say good-bye. I hear people saying good-bye to me all the time, but I never get the chance to say good-bye to them. I love you so much Brandon. I will never forget you! Please don't forget me, but find someone else to love. You will hurt less that way." "Kaitlyn! I will never forget you I need you! I can never love someone else. I don't want to say good-bye." He goes on, "Kaitlyn! We need you here! We want you here!" Brandon is making this harder for me than it already is. I kiss him. He is kissing back. This is our last kiss. "I'll miss you Brandon!" I say. "I will miss you too Kaitlyn!" "I love you forever and always!" "I love you too!" I dissapear and cry. I cry in the place everyone calls Heaven. Nothing ever occured to me about my ex-boyfriend who I called Kyle. Also knowned as one of my former best friends. I look down on him. I see him reading about my death now. Tears beating down his face. He quickly grabs the phone and calls my mother. She tells him everything. I cannot believe I forgot to tell him.I said my good-byes to everyone and now I know I am not coming back at all. I guess I have a new best friend up here. Kayla will help me out here. I feel like I am alone up here. I feel like I will never fit in up here. I keep watching everyone down there. Makes me think of what I am missing out on. I am going to send Brandon a girl. Just like me in everyway. Maybe he might be happy. Well When he is ready I will. She exists, I know it. My funeral arrangements were set up and I am going to attend my own funeral. How weird is that? My dad is flying here to see the funeral, I never thought i'd say this, but I am nervous. I am nervous to here what people have to say about me. I wonder who all is coming. Is Kyle coming? I know Brandon is and I know Tabitha will. Do I dress up for my own funeral? In Heaven the color is white, white means happiness I guess. So nobody wears black here. Black is what you wear at funerals. So I am not going to dress up because nobody can see me anyway. I walk around heaven looking down at everyone I loved. Tabitha is trying on the dress I made her. It happened to be black. We had matching dresses that we had made eachother. Close friends for a long time. The dresses were made a long time ago. Tabitha made the dress fit better. That is all she did to it. Brings memories back. I wish I could be there with everyone. I never got a chance to go to prom, to graduate, to live life, or do anything I hoped to as a child. All my life I have wanted to go. I will be with Brandon there, but he won't know it. All of this was Unexpected for everyone. Nobody knows I was writing a letter. The letter was for my grandfather. The letter was found. The Letter Dear Grandfather, It's me, Kaitlyn. Thanks for helping me with my goals. I want to be just like you! I am getting older. I wish I knew where you were. You being the traveling journalist you are, you cannot give to much information away. By the time you get this, I would have found some way to get this to you. Did you know Mom and Dad just got divorced and I am upset. Yes, they were fighting a lot, but now I have to choose who to live with. I have stuff at both houses. Daddy is moving back home to Newberry, Florida. Mamma is staying here in Los Angeles California. I really am nervous about this. I don't want to hurt their feelings. I am going to stay at Daddy's for a bit. I have no choice there though. I don't know how long this will last. It is November. He moves tomorrow. Today is November third to be exact. I leave and say my good-byes to Mamma and all my friends. I am in a fight with Tabitha. You remember her. One of my good friends from when I was little. I said good-bye to Brandon and all the Los Angeles friends I have. Now it's time to say good-bye to my best friend in the whole wild world, Mamma. I am now in Newberry with Daddy. Back in the old house, I sit and I am writing to you. I took my breathing treatments for the day. I bet mamma told you about the accident. I really don't feel like saying it. Grandfather, when will I see you again? It's not the same without you! I have a feeling, somethings wrong. Are you okay? I really hope nothing happened to you. I sit in my room looking at a picture of us. The one taken before you left. I really wanna know what is new with you. I am the only child still. Really lonely. I have always wanted a brother or a sister. When the family was together we would have dinner just the three of us every night. In the quiet because everything was always the same. Same stories, same people. If there was more of us, it would have been different. We might even have to fight to get some food. That would be funny though, don't you think. By the way. Happy Thanksgiving! I know when you get this this will be alot of reading for you. But I just hope, you will read it all. Thanksgiving was different this year. Daddy messed up. He bought a ham, not a turkey. I wish it was like normal. I wish you were here for the holidays. I wonder what mamma did for thanksgiving. Probably worked, that's all she has been doing lately.I have been looking at your picture and smiling. Wondering, did he change? Why won't he talk to us? I want to get you something for Christmas. I was thinking a notebook. You would like that. You can write about your day. You can write my back. I would read every last word everyday for the rest of my life. Will you be here for prom? I want you to be here when I go off with my date for the night. Don't tell Daddy this, but I wanna go live with Mamma. Mom and I we were two peas in a pod. Hope you had a good Thanksgiving where ever in the world you are. So it's Christmas Eve and I think I am about done writing to you. I will send it because I think we found where we can send it to you. This way it keeps your secret. And you and I can talk. I won't tell anyone anyway. It can be our little secret anyway. I am on my way to Los Angeles and I cannot wait to see Mamma. Is she excited? I ask myself everyday, Does she even love me? I bet she does. I am worried that she or Daddy just say that. I have a feeling you don't love me because you won't tell us where you are. What is so secret over there? It is not like you are at war! You are exploring the world. Where all have you been anyway? How do you get around? Will I ever see you again? Please talk to me! I miss you Grandfather! Did I tell you I have straight A's at school! I am moving back to Los Angeles with mom since I still have my spot at LAHS! Did I tell you I got into the best high school in America! I am so proud! Mamma is not answering her phone. Where is she? I am so worried something happened to her. I called Tabitha and she is coming to pick me up! I will be okay, are you? I miss you! I love you Grandfather! I will be okay and we will let you know we need you. Will you let us know if you need me? I love you! Love, Kaitlyn The Funeral My Grandfather got the letter in enough time to come to the funeral. He came in astonishment of my passing. A few people were so kind and wrote speeches. Grandfather was one of those kind people. Everyone had flowers in their hands. Brandon sat in the front row of the chapel and cried. Tears streaming down his beautiful, tan, face. I could not believe how upset I made him. Tabitha looked so wonderful in the dress we had designed. Dad trying to be tough, I can see right through it, if their wasn't so many people here, he would be crying like a baby. Mom, so upset, Mascara running down her face onto the floor. When she gets up, their is a black puddle on the ground by her seat. The paster says "Now for speeches from close family and friends. First is her mother." "Hello ladies and gentlemen. Thanks for being here for my little girl, we are not here today to dwell on her passing, we are here today to celebrate her life and all her accomplishments. My daughter was an amazing person in this world. she went through a lot. I loved her so much and I could not have asked for more. I did not think I could love another child as much as I loved her. Kaitlyn was so amazing. My only child. She will be missed and I hope she Rests In Peace." The next speech was my father. "Kaitlyn she was courageous. She was murdered by a wolf. I do blame myself that she is not with us today. If I would have told her to stay with me a little while longer, she would still be here today. My little girl had goals. She had a life. I wish my little Kaitie was still here with me flashing those big white teeth she would flash all the time. I smiled everytime she flashed her teeth. She was so unique in every way. When I found out about my little girl, I died a bit inside. Tabitha was one of her best friends and tried so hard to help Kaitlyn. Tabitha, I thank you so much for risking your life for my daughter when I know you could have ran, but you stayed and tryied to help. Kaitlyn, you are gone, but never to be forgotten." I heard that, I cried. Next was Brandon. "Hello I am Brandon, Kaitlyn's boyfriend. Well I was her boyfriend. When I met Kaitlyn, I was saying to my friends, that is the girl I am going to date. Nobody believed me. They thought she was out of my leage. She is. I was the most popular guy in school and when everyone met her she was the most popular girl in school. I fell in love with this beautiful girl who I pray I will meet again soon. Everyone said we were the perfect couple. When I heard about the accident, I was in the middle of an important meeting with the college of my dreams. I ran out of that meeting and went to the hospital and waited for days. I cried and cried. I had plans. I was going to propose to her at prom. But we were going to get our careers going before we would get married. I loved that girl to death. The last thing I said to her was I love you forever and always. and I meant it." Brandon made me ball my eyes out. Next was Tabitha. "Hello, I am the girl that risked my life to save the best friend I had ever had. I didn't know what to do if I lost her. But I did. We both designed this dress for the fun of it. I think of her every second my life now. It is my fault. I could have taken her the other way, but I took her the way I thought would be fastest. That night scared me to death. I called Brandon and her parents when we were on the way to the hosptial. Yes, I could have left her and ran to get help. But if I did that, she would have been eaten to death. I was not going to let my best friend die. I got a guys attention. He was coming home from work. He was a doctor. He helped. He kept Kaitlyn alive as long as he could. He kept her alive for days. I still feel her with me. Right now. Everywhere, every minute of everyday. She is always with us." My grandfather had to follow after Tabitha. " Kaitlyn was my only granddaugther. She had wrote me. I am a traveling journalist. I travel the world writing. Kaitlyn had said, 'Grandfather, I want to be just like you when I get older. You are my Idol and Rolemodel.' Those were her exact words. I cried when she said that. She was only five. She put a smile on my face. I think about that moment everyday. If I need to smile. I think of that moment. She was writing this note for me. For about two months. She was worried. She hasn't seen me since she was five. Now she was going to be eightteen soon and I never got to say good-bye. She was the best granddaughter ever!" Tears filled my eyes as I heard these speeches. I looked through the audience and see all my friends from Newberry. Even Kyle came. As we go outside and pack into cars, we all drive to the cementary where I am going to be burried. All the cars drove in a line. Police escort to the Los Angeles Cementary. There are some police still looking for the wolf that had killed me. I will get pay back everyone is saying. The wolf will be put down. I will be watching and make sure the wolf is the only one that sees me. Watching the wolf get killed like the wolf killed me. I finally can rest in peace when the wolf is caught. I always have this feeling. The feeling telling me there is no going back. It is like you are walking alone in the darkness. Cannot look back, just look forward. But i my positon, there isn't even a chance to look back. My life is over, literally. When you are a teenager, you say, "My life is over" when you are being over dramatic, but I am not being dramatic, I cannot go back to how life should be. Or how life needs to be. I think about all this as I watch my friends and family put flowers and notes at my grave. My grandfather, my mom, my dad, Tabitha and Brandon put the speeches at my grave. I am burried in the Mausoleum so everyone can put all this stuff and not worry about it getting ruined. I stood next to my family tracing my name on the stone. I never thought I would see it up there. Nobody can see me, but I can see them. Tears flow from everyone's faces. I can feel tears dripping off my cheeks. As I keep tracing my name, I see a hand tracing my name as well. It's Brandon. Brandon is tracing my name crying. If I would have waited, I would still be alive today. I should have stayed with my dad a little longer. Kyle decides, "Hey I will go talk to Kaitlyn's boyfriend" Brandon tried to get out of the conversation. Kyle was saying how terrible I was and how I mistreat everyone I meet. Brandon did not like that at all. He would not stop saying bad stuff about me. I didn't want Kyle here. I am dead so I have no control over that. I have lost everything. But, It is for the best that I am gone. That I am not torchuring everyone. Being at the funeral I realized if life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. The lemon is me passing away in this situation. Brandon and everyone else need to make the best of this situation Brandon can meet someone else. Tabitha can get a new best friend and my parents can go and date other people without having to worry about me. I will be watching to make sure everyone is doing good and staying out of trouble, but I want them to be happy. To be happy and not stress about me. I'll be Watching Just watching and waiting. Trying to protect everyone that was close to me. I go and trace my name everyday.I look and more and more things are added to my part everyday. Where my accident occured, there are flowers and a sign that says "Be Safe" right where I died. My story is everywhere. Across the news, across the world. They found the wolf. Thank gosh too. I am finally in Peace. The wolf was put down...today. Brandon was there. I saw him and wanted to kiss him. His eyes are bloodshot. You can tell he was crying. His sister made him a shirt. Made everyone close to me a shirt. The shirt says,"Rest In Peace Kaitlyn" And my picture is on it. On the back is my story. So many people wanted one after that, she sold them. Now Brandon sees my face everywhere. Standing in line at the store and having to read my story. The people close to me have shirts that say things like "Kaitlyn's boyfriend" on Brandon's. I watch Brandon and he wears that shirt all the time. He prays all the time. I look down and Brandon says good night to me everynight. It is not like he actually sleeps. He stays up thinking about me. He has barely gotten any sleep since I have been gone. I haven't even processed it yet. Has he? I looked down the next day to see him sitting on the sidewalk at school. He looks up and says "I love you Kaitlyn!" I scream on the top of my lungs, "I LOVE YOU BRANDON!" but to him, that came out as thunder. He looks up as I cry. I cry and cry. It starts raining from my crying. He runs inside because it is pouring. "Mom, she is out there. I felt it. The rain is her crying, I have a feeling." he says to his mom. "Honey, you need sleep. Go get sleep." She says back. He is right. She isn't. I break the rules. I know I am not suppose to do this, but oh well. On his computer a chat comes up. Im here, I love you! My tears are the rain. I watch you from up here. I am right next to you. Look to your right. I am sitting there and watching you. You are covered in my tears. I know I am torchuring you. I am breaking rules doing this. I love being able to see you. I just say one thing. You need to get over me. There is no way for me to come back. I see you everyday at my stone. I traced my name. I know you have. One time we traced it together. I have always been here. You just didn't know it. I told you I would. I want my life back. Please do me a favor, move on. Kayla is helping me break this rule. This is all I need to tell you! Brandon, Please, I am going to be sending you signs. You will know when I am with you. I miss you! I love you! XOXOXOXOXO -Kaitlyn When he read that he look to his right and said "Kaitlyn?" He thinks he is going crazy. He is just human. I am sending him the right girl. A girl just like me. I feel he might be ready. My heart pounds every time I think about Brandon. I want the best for Brandon. That very next morning Brandon was at school for the first time since I passed. He got all his missing work and got all caught up. He went to his locker for the first time and stared at our picture. Tears streamed from his face. I cannot take this anymore. I torchure him. I know I torchure him. I just cannot stand not being with him. Kayla said, "You will always feel like this. It might be meant to be if he passes away before he is twenty. If he older than twenty and alive still, it is not meant to be." "I want him to lose his life before twenty then, but I want him to be happy and live. He is going to be eightteen soon. He has time then."I answer in terror. I look down and I see him staring at my closed locker that says, "Rest In Peace Kaitlyn Marie Allen". He says, "I know your here Kaitlyn. I need you. Your in a better place now." After all the heartaches of watching Brandon, I decide to watch Tabitha. Tabitha started a "Kaitlyn Group". This group is to share my story. Tabitha found my journal. This journal was given to me when I moved to Los Angeles and I wrote in it everyday. I wrote about my fights with my friends. I wrote about Brandon. I wrote about everything that I cared about and that I wanted to look back and remember. Growing up, my favorite book was "The Diary of Anne Frank". That book shares a wonderful story that I thought was unique. This thirteen year-old girl has to stay in an attic called "The Secret Annex" with people she barely knew and she was stuck in there for two years. To make matters worse, Anne was a normal teenage girl who was adventurous. This was her story. My journal is like her diary. People say "Kaitlyn is the next Anne Frank. It was funny, we both had a goal to be journalists. And we both died before we can even finish high school. She died in a concentration camp, I died from a wolf. Was it Jacob Black? Jacob Black was a werewolf from one of my favorite movies called, "Twilight". This movie was a series. I was always on Team Jacob. Not Edward. The Letters People put notes they right me at my podium at my stone where I am burried, or in my locker. Once in a while I like to read these. Some are so sweet I cry. Some are from people who I never talk to. One stands out from all the others. A girl from my school who was a few years younger than me remembered when she was a freshmen on her first day of school what I did to help. I was glad I could help. Dear Kaitlyn, I am sorry to here about your passing. I will never forget the day you helped me on my first day of school. I was knew there and I was a freshmen. You were a junior and you knew your way around. The day was not a good start for me. First I dropped my books, then got pushed down trying to pick them up, then I got lost. I was so confused. Such a big school and I still get lost. But when I get lost, I think about the day you helped me. People would make fun of me and you would stand up for me. Now you are gone, nobody talks to me in your grade. I pass your locker everyday. It says "Rest In Peace Kaitlyn Marie Allen". I stand there for a minute and stare. If you would have not helped me, I would have most likely committed suicide. I had a friend. Brandon and Tabitha want to be my friend. I don't want to replace you. I don't think anyone will heal from your passing. Days go on. Your story is always on tv. On every channel. Rest In Peace and thanks again for everything! I cannot thank you enough! Sincerly, Amy Lynn Baker Dear Kaitlyn, You were such a cool person. Nothing is right without you. I have a confession. I was always jealous of you and Brandon. I have had a crush on you for the longest time and I cannot stand that I never got the chance to tell you. We talked in the halls. The oneday we talked outside of school, was when we found the rose. I found one exactly like it and I thought of you. So I put this at where you lie and I hope nobody takes it. Shame on them if they do. Thanks for all the help you had given me and I will always think of the girl who helped me when I needed it. Brandon was lucky he had you. I see him all around school and all he does is think about you and what he had lost. When he lost you he gained strength because he lost the most important thing to him. He will always have you at heart, everyone will. I am so sorry for your family. When I walk down the school halls, I feel like you walk around the halls still. There will always be a piece of you here. Sincerly, David Williams Dear Kaitlyn, I really never liked you. I thought you thought of yourself as "little miss perfect" who all guys drooled over since the day you got here. I am glad you are gone. Nobody needs you here anyway. You stole my boyfriend and I am glad your gone so I can have him back. I have my ways and trust me, I never lose. I am on the wolf's side. I wish I could have watched you suffer. I do not get why everyone is making a fuss over your death. Your stupid story is all over school and I am so tired of hearing about it. Brandon will be mine and forget about you in a heartbeat. Kaitlyn, you got what you deserved! I hope you can read it from where you are. I know for a fact you are not in heaven. Just watch down and see Brandon get over you! Sincerly, Brittany Sanderson I saw all these letters and I cried. The one from Brittany really hurt me. I thought we were friends. She acted like it most of the time. But what did I expect, she was popular. I wasn't. Only around Brandon. I never knew he broke up with her for me. I didn't even know they dated. Unless they dated before I got there and she wanted him back. Brandon won't see that letter, I hope. I look down at Brandon to see her coming on to him. He tries to get away. She kept him in. I wish I was down there with him now. The Chats I found out I could go on my friends computers and look from up here. I also go down and stand behind them while they are on. Most of the time on my profile. Wow nobody deleted it yet. I am shocked. I really thought somebody would have by now. I see people posting on my profile every second. They post stuff like, "Kaitlyn was cool, she has an amazing story." "I never knew her, but I wish I did." All these make me cry. Tabitha and Brandon post all the time about me. I have a fan page. How cool is that! As I look I see messages from people trying to get ahold of me. I look at all these IM's and stare. I look at Brandon and Brittany's Im's to see what is going on with them. Chat with Brandon and Brittany Brittany: Hey hottie! Brandon: Hi... Brittany: So since your single now and that idiot is out of your life we can finally be together again! Brandon: Don't talk about her like that again! She was amazing and a better girlfriend than you will ever be! She was the love of my life. I cared so much for her and she is gone. Don't talk to me again and stop coming on to me. I will never date you again! Brittany: Brandon, don't say that babe! We belong together! You know it in your heart! Stop trying to hide it! Brandon: You and I do not and never will belong together! I know nothing in my heart but that I love and will always love Kaitlyn! I have nothing to hide! Brittany: You do have stuff to hide. If you do not want to be with me, then fine, I will make your life terrible. You will never show up again. Our names even go together. Don't you see that Brittany and Brandon forever! Brandon and Kaitlyn sounds really bad! Brandon: Just stop trying to do whatever you are doing. Brittany I will never go out with you again. Going out with you was the worst mistake of my life. I feel sorry for your family! You get to obbsessed to fast. Now good-bye! Brittany: Brandon please! Hear me out! I love you! We were made for eachother! God has spoken to us. Plus dating me could not be the worst mistake of your life bc remember that one night? Or atleast I will tell everyone about the night. Brandon: What night! We barely even kissed when we were dating! GOOD-BYE! I do not need you in my life. Brandon logged off after that chat. I think somebody is obbsessed. I thought ab out going and looking at my old chats with him. Should I? It might be to hard. To hard to read all that stuff and missing what we had. I think we will always have it. I really want Brandon to find someone else. To get over me. I am not coming back. But who am I to be saying get over someone when I cannot even get over the love of my life. He always knew how to make me laugh. I miss him. So I finally get the strength to look at the chats. Brandon: Hey babe! Kaitlyn: Hey guess what! Brandon: What? Kaitlyn: I am coming home. I am going to live with my mom in California. I am so excited I have already started packing. Brandon: That's great! I am so happy. Does it feel good to be home though? Kaitlyn: Well I did grow up here for a long time. I see all these markings and I think, wow I was so stupid. I carved my name into everything. But I did carve "Kaitlyn+Brandon=Love" in a tree outside my window as I sat and stared at the moon. Brandon: Aww that's so cool. Tabitha and I have been talking. She didn't even know you left. I thought you were suppose to be best friends? Kaitlyn: We were in a fight. I never got the chance to tell her I was leaving. Brandon: She was upset and felt unloved. Kaitlyn: I bet, I missed hanging out with her. Brandon: Oh, but I love you! Kaitlyn: I love you too! I cannot wait to be back! To see your wonderful face and to be with you! Brandon: Oh I know, I love you so much that I do not want to lose you! Kaitlyn: Same, I gotta go though, I am about to leave for the airport. I love you! Brandon: Love you too! Bye! That was my last chat with him. The one we will remember forever. The day he could finally look back at the messages he read these and printed it out. He put it in an envelope and put at where I rest to this day. I really don't want to torchure him anymore than I already have. I want to go on his computer and delete ever message we had. I know he looks at the messages everyday. He tears up. When I see Brandon that way it feels like my heart is ripping open and I cannot do anything about it. Brandon and I are not meant to be. Well unless he passes away before the age differences. I need to help him get over me. The Perfect One After working so hard I am trying to find the perfect girl for Brandon. I finally found her. I will send her to him. She is a working journalist. She has blonde, beautiful, straight, soft, long hair like mine. She also has blue eyes and a wonderful sense of humor. She starts LAHS next week. Just moved here for the journalism program. She unpacks and ends up living next door to Brandon. As she unpacks Brandon comes over with a "welcome to the neighborhood" basket. She smiled and looked into his beautiful eyes that I fell in love with. He says, "Hello I'm Brandon and I live right next door if you need anything." "Hello, I'm Kelsey and I live, well here." She laughed so much as she answers. "Nice to meet you Kelsey, what school are you going to?" "LAHS I got into the journalism program." "That's the school I go too, if you have any questions just ask me." "Thanks, this is my senior year so I am nervous to go to a new school." Brandon and Kelsey smiled. Brandon thought of me the whole time talking to her. The problem is she is just like me so he will not be able to forget about me. "Well I guess I will see you at school then. I can take you if you want." "That will be great thanks." She closes to door. As he walks back to his house he goes to the tree where he sees "Kaitlyn is the most amazing girl ever!" and "Brandon is the most amazing guy ever!" I remember when we carved them. That was my last month in Los Angeles before I moved. When Brandon gets to the tree he looks up and says "Did you send her to me Kaitlyn? Are you watching me? Are you trying to make me happy?" A piece of paper flies through the window and into his hand. It said "Yes". He looks at it and said to himself "I knew she was there." The next week came by and Brandon went to go take Kelsey to school. "Thank you so much, you are the only one I know here." Kelsey said. Brandon said, "No problem anytime." When they got to school Brandon showed her around and stopped and stared at my picture. He said, "Hey Kaitlyn" to my picture like he does everyday. "Who is that?" Kelsey asked. "She was my girlfriend. She died not to long ago. She was the perfect girl for me." "oh, I am sorry for your loss. If you don't mind me asking, what happened." "She was moving back here to live with her mom when she got here she got a ride with her friend. The car broke down and a wolf attacked them. That was the only wolf here. They found the wolf and put the wolf down." "I am so sorry! She is the girl I heard on the news." "Yeah her story is still going around." "You know if she really loved you, she is still with you. She will always be with you." He smiled when he heard her say that. "You know I see her in you." He tells her. "Really? Is that a good thing or a bad thing?" "Good because she was so amazing." "That's good." "She wanted to be a journalist and was in the program here." "Really?" "You took her place here. Her locker will never be used again. People can put letters in there she can read them from above. I put them on where she lies." Really? She was lucky to have a guy like you." "Thanks, when I am ready to date I'll let you know." He walked away. I think to myself, "GO OUT WITH HER!" He knows she is perfect for him. He cannot get over me I think. When he gets home and watches tv, a commercial came on. "Find the perfect girl for you? Ask her out! Don't wait to long! You might lose her! Call 1-800-KAITLYN" That was a hint from me for him to go ask her. He laughed at my ways of sending hints. "Really Kaitlyn! Are you sure?" He asks me. Another commercial comes on. "Yes! I love you so much!" It was a girl getting proposed to. The next day when he picked Kelsey up to take to school he asked her to go to a movie. She said yes. Kelsey and Brandon went to a movie where my story was one of the commercials. Brandon had to leave. He went to the bathroom until the commercial was over. When he came back Kelsey asked, "Are you sure about this?" "Yeah, I just don't want them to make her story a movie, it is hard enough that her birthday is almost here." "Really? I am so sorry!" "Oh good the movie is starting." Now they are making my story into a movie! Oh great! What will my family say? I feel bad for Brandon to find out like this. His eyes tear while watching the movie. The movie about my story comes out on my birthday and everyone in my life gets a free ticket. Like they want to watch a movie about my story when they lived it. They lived through all the pain. All the suffering I caused. Just from my death. I am sorry everyone! The Birthday My birthday is today and my parents decided to celebrate my long life. I would be eighteen. My dad came all the way to Los Angeles for the party. Everyone decided to go see the movie about my story. The theater was packed! The movie was also sold out. Zac Efron played Brandon. Cameron Diaz plays me. The Movie is called, "The Story of a Teenager" This movie was rated Pg-13. While watching the movie Brandon had to leave. I saw tears streaming down his face like a river. Kelsey came with him even though she never met me. I wanted her to come. I sent her to him. When the movie ended everyone clapped. At the end of the movie it said, "This girl lost her life and didn't need to. This was not anyone's fault. Pray for everyone around her." Then it said the names of everyone and had pictures of the real people. At the end it said, "Based on a true story." After the movie, everyone went back to the party and left flowers. I would be eighteen today and at school more and more flowers appeared at my picture and my plack. I felt loved. I really did. My whole school was at the party, execpt for Brittany. I didn't think she would be there anyway. I went down and sat next to everyone. I knew they felt me there. Trying to say Thank you for coming. Speeches were given. But I did notice Tabitha left early. Brandon followed her out. "Tabitha where are you going?" "I need out of here!" "Why where do you have to be, this is your best friends birthday!" "No it isn't it is my old best friend's birthday, my new best friend is Brittany." "Do not be friends with her, she hated Kaitlyn!" "Well I do too!" "What did Kaitlyn ever do to you? Be your friend! She was always a good friend to you!" "SHE LEFT ME IN THIS WORLD TO BE SOMEWHERE ELSE!" "DO YOU THINK SHE WANTED THIS! SHE CAN'T PICK WHEN SHE DIES!" "I lose one of the closest people to me and nobody cares!" "We all care she is gone! She was an amazing person!" "How was she an amazing person if she left us? She could have fought for her life, but she didn't, she gave up!" "No she didn't her heart stopped! You use to think this was your fault that she is gone!" "Brittany told me it isn't, it is her fault, she probably could have gotten away!" "You are wrong! You were her best friend! She watches us all the time to make sure we are fine. She makes sure nothing happens to us. She is probably watching us right now!" "Who cares! I don't! She messed everything up for me!" Tabitha pulls out a cigarette. "Tabitha! You smoke now!" "Yeah, want one?" "No, you've changed! You're just like Brittany. Do us all a favor and dont talk to us again. We were your friends. You don't care about anyone but yourself!" Brandon walks back inside. He grabs his keys and says good-bye to my parents. "Hey sorry, I gotta run, I will come by tomorrow to help clean up." "Bye Brandon, thanks for coming and thank you for offering to clean up." My parents said. Brandon took Kelsey home and went and tried to get ahold of Tabitha. He went out that night. All by himself. Tried to find Brittany and Tabitha to try to get them to change. He wanted to find the old them. I wish I could help. But since it was my birthday, this is the only day out of the year I cannot protect anyone. Well it would be the only day I need to protect someone. We Meet Again "Well, well, well Tabitha, look who came to see us." Brittany said. "We need to talk." Brandon demands in anger. "What? Did you finally get your head on straight?" "Brittany I told you I won't date you again! You changed Tabitha, why?" "Why you ask, because I need her. She was Kaitlyn's bestfriend, I know Kaitlyn watches you guys. I want to make her mad. Plus, Tabitha is easy to break. You on the other hand, your harder than rock. You know you want me. She gets close and kisses him. Brandon pulls away, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" "You Know you want me and you can have me." "I don't want anything to do with you!" He leaves. He walks to his car as Brittany follows him. She takes him inside the abandoned warehouse. She kills him right there and says to Tabitha, "If I can't have him, nobody can!" She leaves his body and goes to her car. She drives off with Tabitha. Leaving Brandon dead in the warhouse. That night was the one night I wish I could protect someone. Out of nowhere, Brandon appears up here. "BRANDON!" I yell so loud everyone stares. "KAITLYN!" He kisses me. "Where am I?" He asked. "Heaven. I have been here watching you. Sending you signals." "I thought so, Oh, Happy Birthday!" "Thanks!" "I have missed you Kaitlyn!" "I have missed you too!" It was so great to see Brandon again and be able to kiss him. I cannot believe Tabitha did this. Her and Brittany. "You know I wanted to help you. I tried to protect you. But I cannot protect anyone on my birthday. And Neither can you." "You did? You didn't want to see me again?" "No, I loved you! I didn't want to watch the guy I love go through what I did. We need someone to find your body. If your body is found we can get them arrested. Remember when I was in the hosptial trying to keep my life. I was unconscious. I was there sitting next to you. Trying to save my life I was half and half. Then I couldn't fight anymore. My heart just stopped and I couldn't help it." "Really? Was that you. The person that emailed me?" "Yeah, I took a risk though. We are not suppose to have access to talk to the living. That is illegal here." "oh, That is why I never got a reply. And those commercials, those were hints weren't they?" "Yeah, Brandon, I love you so much!" "I love you as much as I can love someone!" I am so glad he is here. We look down at the perfect time. Brandon's body was found. We now can lead the cops to Brittany and Tabitha. To think Tabitha use to be my bestfriend. I cannot let her get away with murdering Brandon! When Brandon goes down to his body, the cops are looking for prints. Tabitha and Brittany are good, they cleaned up! I look around for clues and so does Brandon. "Let's go catch your killers." I say to him. "Yeah, I still cannot believe Tabitha and Brittany. Do you know Tabitha smokes now?" "Yeah, I found out and I cried. I didn't think she'd be like that. She use to be the best friend! She use to think my death was her fault. Now I am starting to think did she take me that way on purpose?" "You know when they are caught my funeral will finally happen." "Yeah, You can really rest in peace after the funeral. I read everything you wrote me Brandon." "You did?" "Yeah I really wanted to read what you felt. Even though I saw you writing it." Brandon and I are together again. I try to send Kelsey to someone else. Her ride to school is gone. She ended up moving to where she came from. Her mom said Los Angeles was not safe enough. I guess she is right. To deaths in one year. We look down to Brittany and Tabitha and we see them talking. Tabitha said, "Wow I cannot believe we are getting away with this." "SHUT UP! We will get caught if someone hears us talking about it stupid." "Sorry, but you do know we might get caught eventually." "I know, thats why we are going to make a run for it. I will take my parents money." "Why not credit cards?" "Are you stupid, they can track it down!" "oh, you know alot about this stuff." "Well I have killed more than Brandon." "Who else" I sent that wolf to Kaitlyn." "YOU WHAT!" "Yeah it is not like your friends with her anymore!" "Still, how did you get the wolf to do that?" "Training duh!" "It was Brittany" I say to Brandon "She killed me!" Brandon said, "She killed both of us! She doesn't know we are together again though." "Yeah, she didn't think this through." He kisses me. I really love him. I would do anything to be alive again with Brandon too. But, he is with me now and that is all that matters. We looked down at everyone and My parents were cleaning up from the party talking. "I thought Brandon said he was coming to help?" My mom said. "I thought so too he probsbly got caught up." My dad answers. When Brandon's parents barge in, "HE'S DEAD!" his mom says crying. "MY SON IS DEAD!" My parents try to keep them calm, but they keep on crying. Now they know why he didn't show up. Brandon starts to cry. "I cannot stand to see my parents like this." He says to me crying. I cannot stand to see him like this. Upset and hurt. Nobody has any evidence on who killed Brandon. Tabitha and Brittany made a run for it. and were out of Los Angeles. Suddenly their tire blew and they were trapped in the middle of nowhere. Not one car stopped for them. Waited and waited but nobody came. Tabitha and Brittany tried to get people to stop, but nobody did, until a cop passed. The cop questioned them. He knew exactly who they were. That was a cop that was trying to find Brandon's murderer. When he saw dirt in the car and on their shoes he remembered what the scene looked like. The exact dirt. The exact foot prints too. "Excuse me ma'am, where were you last night between eleven at night to midnight?" He asked curiously. "Sleeping a girl needs her beauty sleep." Brittany answers cautiously. "Why are you leaving town?" "Going on vacation with my friend." "Well I was told you were seen at the old warehouse last night." "I was, but I, I-" She stutters not knowing what to say. "Ma'am get out of the car, both of you." They both step out. "You both are being arrested for the murder of the teenage boy named Brandon." Rest In Peace Brandon can finally rest in peace because Tabitha and Brittany were caught and his funeral is today. "Kaitlyn, can you go with me to my funeral?" Brandon asks. "Of course, you were at mine, I'll be at yours." I answer. Nobody will be able to see me. Everyone thought it would be cool if we could be burried next to each other. So we were. Brandon and I were all dressed up because it wouldn't feel right. "Kaitlyn, this isn't a dream right?" Brandon asks me like he was worried. "No, this is real life. This is heaven. The worst is past us." I answer trying to calm him down even though I still think it is a dream. "We will never see our family will we?" "We see them, they cannot see us." "I should have not gone to talk to them!" "It isn't your fault! Is this your way of telling me you don't want to be with me!" "No, I love you! I wanted to marry you! I do not want to be dead! I got into colleges. I had dreams and plans." "So did I! I wanted to be a journalist!" "I know I am sorry. I am just so upset my life is over. I know you went through this too." "Yeah, but the difference is I went through this alone." "You had that Kayla girl." "But I barely knew her. You have me." "I know, but you know me I miss my life." He offended me when he said that. Does he not think I miss mine? " I miss mine too, but lets just focus on your funeral okay." "Okay." We look down as he looks in the casket and he sees a pale face that he sees when he looks in the mirror. I see his tears drip down his face and I rarely see him cry. I grab his hand and holds it. He holds mine back but holds tight like he would if he was trying to save a life from falling off a cliff. I know what he is going through and I don't know how to comfort him. "Hang in there." I say to him trying to keep him calm. He is hurting and I don't know how to stop the pain. He sees how much pain his parents are in and says, "I did that to them." "No you didnt! You had no control over them! Don't you dare blame yourself!" My best friend betrayed me and I will never forget that. After Brandon's funeral I looked down at Tabitha and Brittany. Tabitha is talking to Ashley who was a friend of mine. "Tabitha, I came to this prison to ask you questions about why your in here." "Okay ask away!" "Did you just use Kaitlyn as a friend?" "When she was gone I started to hang out with Brittany and she was so much better than Kaitlyn. When Brittany told me about how she hated Kaitlyn we said we can get rid of her. Then Kaitlyn made it so easy when I found out she was coming back so we distracted her mom and I picked her up, took her by the woods and faked everything." "Some friend you are!" "I don't regret what I did. Yes, I am in this awful place, but I don't have to worry about Kaitlyn or Brandon!" "What did they do to you?" " Kaitlyn knew I liked Brandon and she still dated him." "So you wanted to get payback by killing her, then torchuring him with her dead and you kill him." "We weren't going to kill him that night, but he had to go to the warehouse." "I can't believe you did that." "I'm human I make mistakes, but this was not one of them." Ashley walked out. She wants to be a lawyer so she felt this was a right time to practice. Yes, lives to end. Nothing is worth giving up on. I worked so hard my whole life just to die at an early age. All I see is Brandon, upset as he is, he will always be the Brandon from down where we lived our whole lives. Tabitha changed. Not for the good, but for the worse and I never did expect that. I also never expected her to show up in my life after she moved. All this was so unexpected and I would never had guessed. Life goes on. I have to remember to stop running when I get scared. Up here is a pretty scary place that I would not have dreamed of being here at this age. Atleast I am up here and not down there under the real world. People say there are angels, but I have not seen one yet. Nobody believes that you could be where I am and how I am right now. I look down everyday and see my parents are still upset about my demise. My parents started talking again though. That is the first step to their friendship. I know they are going to be just friends, but I hope they find away to be happy. Since my dad moved back to California to be close to me, he sees alot of my mom so they came up with an agreement. I try to look at life as a good thing. Everything happens for a reason. I believe the reason Brandon died was to be with me. I just wish he didn't have to die for us to be together. Brandon is all I have here. I did have Kayla to help me. But, he has me though, I had to meet all new people and he had already known someone when he arrived here. I want Brandon to be happy. I want Brandon to be happy for us to be together. Brandon was so upset after parting. He thought we would never be together again. Now look at us together. "I know you are upset. I saw you when I gone. You couldn't see me. But, I could see you and it broke my heart to see you so upset. You thought we would never be together again. Well look at us. Together forever and you know you make my world and I would give anything to make you happy." I say to him hoping I can make him feel like there is a reason he is here. "I know you try and try. Nothing will work. I will never be the same Brandon I was down there. I will never get to the chance to do any of the things I had hoped." He tells me. "I hope you know we are here forever so we need to get you back to the Brandon you were!" "I know that in my heart, just not my head." As Kayla bursted into the room she screams, "THE WAR, IT'S HERE!" "What are you talking about Kayla?" I ask. "The war. It doesn't happen often. Heaven has been attacked by down under! We don't have enough people to help. I cannot get enough to go for it. If we lose, we all die. When you die here. There is no coming back. You are definatly gone forever!" She explains. "I'm in." Brandon says to Kayla. "BRANDON DON'T, I DON'T WANT TO LOSE YOU!" I scream to him. "I want to help. I want to make myself useful." "Fine, I am in too." The War Kayla is glad I volunteered, but Brandon isn't. "Kaitlyn, don't, I cannot lose you again. I will not lose you again." "Brandon, you are so I am. They need us or we all die!" "They can find someone else!" "I am doing this whether you like it or not!" I cannot believe him. I am the last hope for us to even have enough. "I have been in every war since I have been here." Kayla tells us. "When does it start?" I ask. "Now, so we have to go." We all rush out and grab all the weapons we can carry. All these people who are trying to fight their way up to trade places with us. I stand by Brandon the whole time. "Brandon, I'm scared." "Don't be, Kaitlyn, I love you!" "I love you too!" We kiss thinking it might be the last time ever. "HELP!" I hear. Kayla is fighting and fighting. I go and try to help. Someone shoots her from behind and she falls to the ground. "KAYLA!" I run to her side as fast as I could. Barely breathing she says, "Save yourself. Only one more left kill him before he kills you! Make sure we win this war. My time is up." "Kayla stay with me! Brandon go kill him!" Kayla's eyes close for the last time as she says "good-bye." In tears I try to save her. I look around me. All alone on the battlefield I sit next to Kayla crying. "Kayla, please! Come back! You were the one person that helped me!" She lived through all the wars she was in. I don't see anyone but bodies. The people we killed start to vanish. Only bodies left were from Heaven. None vanished. The war has not ended. One left fighting hard. I leave Kayla just for a minute to see where Brandon is. I feel something hard hit me. The last guy left through a hard rock at me. No gun. Nothing. He is giving me a look. He killed my friend. I will never see her again thanks to him. I hear someone scream, "KAITLYN! THERE ARE MORE! COME HELP! I NEED You Kai-" Then I hear a shot. I run as as fast I can. I will not lose Brandon too. "Kaitlyn. I need you to understand. I might not come back. I want you here to stay if I don't. I want you and everyone else to try to kill these last few." "I can't. Please, don't leave me." I cry hoping I don't lose him. Text: Kenzie Elizabeth Mulligan Editing: Kenzie Elizabeth Mulligan All rights reserved. Publication Date: May 2nd 2014 https://www.bookrix.com/-kenzie.catcher12
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-jack-ivey-the-suicide/
Jack Ivey The Suicide The Suicide Removing the chrome plated .38 caliber revolver from the dresser drawer, he places the barrel in his mouth. The taste of the cold metal on his tongue causes him to wince. Darren likes how it feels in his hand as he closes his lips around it and places his finger on the trigger. Darren catches a glimpse of himself in the mirror and thinks how disgusting he looks; how cowardly his appearance reflects back at him. But it does not sway his decision. It is his 30th birthday and he has made up his mind that facing another year is not worth the effort. He has not written a note as there is no one to address it to or who would even care what he had to say. His reasons do not matter just as his life does not matter. Sweat beads on his forehead as he slowly applies pressure to the trigger, the knuckle of his index finger now white on his nervously shaking hand. Closing his eyes, he squeezes. In a flash he can feel the bullet piercing the roof of his mouth, ripping his flesh apart as if in slow motion. The pain is unimaginable as the flying piece of steel enters his brain, twisting and turning as it carves a deadly path through his sad endless memories. And then, everything goes black as the back of his skull explodes, spraying shards of bone and brain matter across the room. His lifeless body hits the floor with a thud; eyes closed, mouth open and the weapon still clutched tightly in his hand. Darren opens his eyes and slams his fist against the warm stone floor. “Oh God, not again— not again!” he shouts. A loud raspy voice bellows from the darkness, “God cannot help you now.” Darren sits in his rusted cage and between sobs pleads, “But why—why must I relive this over and over again?” “This is hell, my little goat; your hell. You should have realized there would be a price to pay for taking your own life,” growls the voice again from the black cavernous chamber outside the cell. “But I didn’t know it would be like this,” he whimpers. “You do now,” laughs the voice as it echoes off into silence. "You do now." Removing the chrome plated .38 caliber revolver from the dresser drawer he places the barrel in his mouth. The taste of the cold metal on his tongue causes him to wince . . . Text: Jack Ivey Editing: Valerie Byron All rights reserved. Publication Date: December 22nd 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-jacki137
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-not-telling-why-should-i-tell-you-bloodwolf/
not telling why should i tell you, really? not telling Bloodwolf A Wilting Spirit -To My family and friends Chapter 1. I found you I woke up finding myself in a mirrored room, covered in red blood stains I padded torward the mirror. I ran so fast, I pounded into the mirror which broke into pieces. I was begged to the ground as I whined in pain. I heard a  yelp. I arose and shook the glass shards off my fur. One stayed in, lodged in my paw. I bit on it and threw it into the window. It's sharp point pierced the glass, only to make the glass shatter. I looked for a whole from where I had hit. A large whole, about the size of a hare, sat in the middle of the wall. I bit the glass, determined. I tore the wall down and spit. I heard the yelp again, but this time It was more joyful. I squeezed through the hole, blood stained fur made me bristle. I ran torwards the sound, following my keen sence of smell. I went into bloodwolf mode, running with speed. I stammered into a tree, falling to the damp autumn leaves. The smell of prey hit my nose, just as I had closed my eyes. I opened them quickly, following the prey. Hopefully Sparky and Zi were hunting. I ran torwards the sound and I met their eyes. They were laughing, oddly, I approached. My heart thumping I finally spoke," Sparky, Zi, What just happened?". They smiled," We escaped, thats what!". I smiled back, trying to push out my emotion. They were clean, but sparky had a limp. I figured they just took a bath in the pond, which was close. I walked to the pond, they thumped their tails onto the ground in a joyful mood, chasing the elk. I guess I should have let loose too, we did escape. Yet the one thing I do not know is that, why are they so happy. Shouldn't we worry. Don't I wish my mother was here, her spirit with me, guiding me. As I soaked my rough stained fur in the water, I hit a break through. I am living in a repeated life. The ones I used to trust, are now my imortal enemies. "Rosy, stop kidding with yourself, your living in the past, enjoy your freedom right now!.",I thought aloud. I rose from the pond and shook, staring down at my fur, clean. I looked around and followed the smell of my sisters. Running, I heard my sweet mothers voice, speaking with joy. "You are going to have to use this time to enjoy life, you never know if it will end. I have spoken to them, I told them not to tell you. I love you Rosy, but this war is not over. Your journey has just begun.". My eyes bulged, and my ears perked. I ran torwards the scent catching up with Sparky and Zi. I faked a smile and bit the elk. Zi brought it to the ground, tripping it. Sparky limped with speed, biting the injured elk, finally bringing it to an end. We feasted on the elk, keeping predators away from the elk. I breathed in heavily, keeping watch of my surroundings. I stretched, extending my claws and bones. A rippling crack made my ears perk. Zi and Sparky did the same. I thumped my tail on the ground, shaking the dirt and moisture off."We better head to sleep, it has been a long day. Our jouney is-", I was cut short by Sparky,"Just begun. Mother told us, We can find some wood. Maybe some old bark.". Zi was already sinking her claws into the bark, scratching the bark between her long claws. We stared at her, then repeated her actions. The hiss of scratching made our ears perk. I gathered a stack with my mouth, and carried it to a pit we dug. The pit would help us stay warm. I dragged the pelts we had gathered and put them at the floor of the pit. Sparky, Zi, and I created a surrounding wall of bark around the pit and left a opening in the middle. We jumped in and made ourselves comftorable. With us being sisters, we all had the same feeling. We couldn't sleep. The thump of the spiders step, made my ears perk. The howl of wolves in other territories disturbed me. I broke the silence," Someone should keep watch, I will do first shift.". Zi and Sparky nodded, swaying their tail in agreement. Once they closed their eyes I could tell I was the only one awake. I rose from the pit and stood watch. I pounced on every mouse I saw. I clawed at the buzz of a fly's wing. A racoons sent caught my nose. I knew with me being a k-9, I couldn't climb, but everything is possible. I ran torwards the tree, digging my claws into the tree, struggling up. I quickly caught my second wind and tugged myself up to the branch. The racoon was startled, showing mercy in their eyes. The guilt felt eyes soon turned, when I reached my full way to the branch. The racoon attacked. I swiped at it's face, tearing the fur from his cheek. He was obviously a dominant male, who had attacked his family because of his sence of smell. I threw him onto the branch, creating a startling sound of crackling through the forest. I leaped onto him, sending him to the ground. I hanged from the branch, which was giving up quickly. I let go while holding onto the base of the tree. I clung, falling slowly, dragging my claws down the tree. I finally hit the ground, staring at the departed racoon. I dragged it to the pit. I through it in a corner, where I slept, not to let the smell linger too far. I cracked my back, stretching. An hour had past, as my eyes became weary. I decided to wait another hour in my shift, they seemed to be having a dream. If I was to disturb it, I would ruin it. In the time being I was alone, with my departed racoon by my side, along with the mice I had swiped. I sat there alone, keeping guard, swtiching from one part of the pit to the other. I chased off prey, and caught some of my own. My pile of prey grew larger. I decided to go ahead and skin them, they would dry by afternoon. I drenched them in water to clean them. My stomach finally began to grumble, so I took some mice, and spared the others for day. A light yellow figure hit the corner of my eye, the sun was warning me I should sleep. I couldn't, yet if I didn't I would keep them behind. I rested my eyes, still wide awake. I finally opened them after a short period of time. I nudged Zi, who looked as if she was having a nightmare. She  awoke fiercly. She yawned, stretching her paws. "How long did you sleep, you have bags?". I responded with a stern voice, trying to correct my howl,"Well, I didn't sleep. I didn't want to keep you up, So I took watch all night. Here, breakfast.". She nudged the racoon back, and stared at me, with a look that I should go to sleep. I begged myself to the ground, and fell asleep in seconds. I could feel the movement of a smile. As I drifted to sleep, she went to collect maple from the tree's. Sparky soon awoke and started to fan the drying pelts with her tail.  I soon awoke to the scratch of claws running down bark. I stretched, extending my claws with a grumbling yawn. I curled my tail, and jumped out of the pit. As I arose from the pit, I felt the crumpling autumn leaves traveling through my claws. I saw Zi gathering the pelts as I thumped my tail, showing hunger. I ate squirrel that was caught during my shift. My ears wearily twitched. Sparky barked enthusiastically,"Good morning!". I smiled happily and thumped my tail with joy. Stretching and extending my claws and yawning. Zi arose from the shadow and thumped her tail, repeating me. Starting the morning, I howled with them. I gazed at a flying leaf in the corner of my eye. I padded over to investigate the disturbance. I clawed at the hare, jumping in front of me. Biting it with stregnth, I carried it to the pile of breakfast. After Zi had skinned the hare, I went over to check on the remaining pelts. I took the racoon, and wore it on my head. I thumped my tail, Sparky and Zi looked over. Zi barked with curiosity,"Nah, too show off for my taste, how about you Sparky?". Sparky returned to the conversation after gulping down a bite of elk,"Ya, were not going to meet anyone you can take it off.". I took off my head and threw it back to the pelts. Gathering my stregnth I ate another elk. I extended my claws, then sheathed them. Brambled tree's whistled through the wind, sending the maple colored leaves west. I turned torwards the wind, my fur bristled. The fur on my back stood up, chilling. I realized a wolf was coming. I sniffed intenslely, It was Broady. I moaned unwelcomely,"Where were you!?". He raised his tail angrily," Im fine thanks for asking!". After he barked I nudged him an elk. He bit into it fiercly and gulped down with rage. Sparky and Zi smirked, thumping their tail in mockery. I sat near a tree, the bramble sticking my fur. I yelped quietly, jumping forward. "Hey we should get going soon, spring is coming in and I want to find a den.", I covered. They nodded. Broady ate his elk and howled, telling us he would be back soon. I felt relief. It was awkward why he has being so mean. It kind of makes me think. How is he so clean. Did he wash in a pond, the scent is nearly all the way off. Sparky confirmed,"Im suspicious, and don't worry Rosy I know you are too. With Broady being so well cleaned and brushed. How did he do it, he nearly got slain by Duke. Ugh that name fills me with rage.". I nodded in agreement. Bristling wind made leaves blow in my face. I blew the fur away from my face and turned torward Sparky,"We should follow  him.", I chuckled.  She nodded, smirking away with Zi. I let my paws adapt to the crisp leaves, not making a sound. Sparky and Zi repeated. We stayed behind a tree as he headed into a cave. His echo's could be heard from where we stood. I sheathed my claws, and waited. Crunching leaves bristled my fur. I turned torwards the noise, still hiding. Duke headed in with Rodessa. I growled silently under my breath trying to contact my mother for advice. A white light stood at the back of my head peering into my eyes, coldly. Zi stared uncertainly in my path, her eyes stayed peeled at mine. Two shining lights shined I made myself halfway to my mom's spirit. I woke up to a grumble, Zi was getting worried. I blinked and returned my normal vision, then peered my head out from behind the prickly tree. I held in the yelp as bramble stuck me in my wound. Tucking my head back behind the tree I felt the warmness of breath behind me. I sighed with relief, he or she must have not had a good sense of smell. My nose led me from behind the tree as I saw Duke coming out with Broady. They smirked constantly. I growled under my breath, holding in the snarl. "Come on lets go, Broady is obviously an enemy.", I whispered. Sparky looked unsure,"Or maybe, we can have some fun." A small smirk appeared in the corner of my mouth. I thumped my tail lightly in agreement.  We ran back to the den. Zi seemed quite weary, so I had her lay down when we returned. While Sparky and Zi rested I hunted. My claws needed sharpening, and my fangs were dimming. Meat would sharpen my fangs and hunting would edge my claws. As I returned from the forest I heard the accustomed sound of a distant snore. I held my prey in my mouth and walked on. Setting it down, my ears perked hearing a crackling leaf. I snarled,"Hello? Is anyone there?!".  Chapter 2. A New Pup A small shadowy image of a wolf appeared before my eyes, peering her head from behind a tree. I snarled slightly,"Who are you!?", I barked. She showed her full self and nervously lowered her head gulping,"Well I-I am Coza. I ran from my dad after an arguement and trust me, Im not going back. Plus my mother is dead so you know." I nodded, noticing her stomach grumble and growl,"Lets get you some food, by the way Im Rose.", I whispered. As I walked to the den site, her stomach was in a non-stop growl. I sped up a little, trying to block the noise. As we approached the den site, I heard again the farmiliar sound of a silent snore. I tilted my head to the meat as Coza padded swiftly over to the meat. She barely chewed as she ate. Zi's nose twitched as she awoke. She faced Coza, then me,"Who's that!", she grumbled. I raised my tail in alarm,"Her name is Coza, I found her wandering. She is very hungry.", I said, calming Zi. Her eyes were weary as she talked," Oh, well where'd she come from?". "She ran away from her dad, and her mother is dead. Her dad was abusive...", I grumbled silently under my breath. Zi nodded and awoke Sparky, telling her Coza was a guest. Over the next few days of preparing for an attack, and trying to find a new den, I grew attatched to Coza. It was like I wanted to protect her. She had no idea we were bloodwolves, but I knew she would find out. Coza grew more humble, bigger over the few days. On the third day of training I finally broke the silence," I think we should find a new den.", I pointed my snout to the fresh green leaves on the tree as I shook my steamed fur. Sparky nodded,"We move today.", she spoke humbly. I threw pelts over my back as Coza sharpened her claws, we had trained her too just in case. I hoped that after we found a Spring and Summer den, I'd get the chance to increase her stamina. She had cracked open her shell of shyness on the second day of training. Her fur was a sparkling grey, her eyes Pacific Blue. As Coza sharpened her claws, Sparky stretched, extending her rippling bones. Zi was limp,"Hey Zi, something wrong?", I asked curiously. She turned her head,"Well, Greeneyes really got me good.",she coughed. I looked at her, and stared into her eyes, letting her know I cared. Sparky sunk her fangs into a pelt and placed it onto her back, she learned now how to walk, holding her limp paw in the air. We were all ready to move, so we started traveling. I kept my eyes peeled at the front of the group, while I stayed in back, I figured someone would plan to attack at the back. I tilted my nose in the air for a big whiff of air, trying to keep note on the wolf scents, or caribou. As we approached a stable den, Sparky sat, lowering the pelts to the ground. Two bushes sat next to the opening of the cave-den. Herbs and tree's created an opening . Coza then repeated Spark, Next Zi. I finally managed to return to this world, I had drifted off into a daydream. I set down the pelts and immediately padded torwards the herbs. I sniffed and picked them. I then swiftly lowered myself to Sparky and attempted to wrap a leaf around her paw. I held the herb on the tip of my snout and gave it to Sparky, Then I did the same to Zi. Coza was gnawing on a bone as I inspected the den. Inside there was a soft pad of thickened moss on the flooring. Vines crawled up the side. I went out and nodded. It was big enough for a family of bears! We all settled inside as I covered a section of the ground in ek pelts. One elk's carcass had been scraped to the bone of meat. An idea sprouted from my brain. I took a bone and started to gnaw a section of it, making sure the lines were perfectly aline. I created a scene of the three of us, Sparky, Zi, and I. I did not include Coza because I wasn't sure If we could trust her yet. Broady hadn't come back, probably because we moved. When I finished I set it on a flat surfaced white-mineraled rock. It was a dirty white, brown included with spots of black. I turned my head, seeing Coza sleeping like a log on the elk pelt. Her eyes were drooped, I could tell she hadn't had a sleep like this in days. I walked to my elk pelt and circled twice. I then lay down, setting my head on my two front paws. My tail curled onto my exterior. Sparky and Zi were wide awake. As I drifted off into my sleep I heard nothing but the soothing rythm of my own heart, dimming as I closed my eyes.    As I woke I felt coza's fur brush against mine, her boney spine against my back. I lifted my snout and took a deep whiff of the atmosphere. I had detected a fresh smell of prey. My mouth watered at the alluring scent of prey. I leaped up feeling the dry feeling of pelt under my paws. I lunged onto the large white boulder, the bone I had gnawed in the corner of my eye. I didn't become distracted, my eyes stayed at target on the small mouse curled up beside the stump of an oak tree. I unsheathed my claws and let all my weight on my haunches. If I approached differently, the mouse would have heard my pawsteps. I crouched forward, my face hidden under the tall lime grass, barely hiding my sparkling white fur. I leaped onto the mouse, my claws digging into the prey. I felt the small body go limp under my paw. Sheathing my claws I devoured the small mouse hungrily. A chill ran down my spine as I turned, stretching my long claws against the moss under my paws. I yawned and went to check on Coza. She was laying, her sparkling blue eyes wide, staring into mine. She yawned, stretching her paws against the elk pelt,"Can we hunt now? Im starving.". Her broad shoulders rippled as she spoke, but I soon replied,"I just ate a mouse, but sure.". It was sunhigh now, the sun shone sparkling against our fur as we headed into the heart of the forest sniffing for the smallest fresh scent of prey. After a while I finally scented caribou. I nodded at Coza, she nodded back letting me know she could scent it too. We unsheathed our claws and padded torward the scent. We spotted a whole caribou and darted swiftly into a brush. Bramble pricked my fur as we lunged behind the brush. We spotted a female, it was limp, easy prey. We crouched low, I took the lead allowing my broad shoulders to rub against the bramble. I lunged forward, Coza a tail legnth behind. My claws sank into the female's flank making her trip gently. She got back up quickly, staggering. She ran, but I was faster. Coza clawed her hind leg and I lunged at her neck, my jaws closing over her windpipe bringing her down. I felt the flesh open under my teeth, it went limp. Coza lunged onto her flank clawing it open to make sure it came to an end. We lugged it back to the den. I was tired and that mouse didn't give me enough energy, so I ate part of the prey. Sparky, Zi, and Coza feasted. The sun was drooping among the sky, it's light dimming gently.  I senced someone was near though, someone unwanted.                     An Unwanted Visitor I sniffed but I couldn't  make out who they were, the scents were all mixed. Prey, wolves, and nature all crowded my nose. I sniffed harder, closing my eyes letting no light peer in. Duke lunged on top of me, sinking his claws into my shoulders, pinning me against the elk pelt. I opened my eyes and swiftly threw him off and searched for my sisters and Coza. They were fighting off other wolves, Broady, Rodessa, and other wolves I didn't know of. I turned and leaped onto Duke, my claws entering his stomach. I raked my claws against his wounds, cutting a deep gash. My shoulders still felt the sting from his claws, but I still fought. I closed my jaws over his neck, biting hard into his windpipe. Rodessa lunged onto my back, releasing me of my grip. Duke stood there limp, but soon staggered to a boulder. I threw off Rodessa as she ran to go get Coza. She jumped onto Coza pinning her, Coza threw her off and lunged onto her spine, tearing a gash in her fur. I leaprd onto Rodessa, helping Coza, I raked my claws down her stomach. She yelped, her limp lungs barely making it out. I nipped at her neck, tearing a small hole in her fur. Sparky and Zi walked over, they had a hard fight I could tell. The other wolves were laying there, limp and lifeless. More wolves surrounded us. My rage came through as I closed my jaws over Rodessa's windpipe tearing a huge gash in it. I held my grip closing harder and harder. I felt the flesh under my jaws go limp. I released my grip an nodded at Coza, who was still clawing and biting. She nodded back calmy and stared at the wolves that surrounded us. One was tending to Duke's wounds. I looked at Coza, her Pacific eyes showing no fear. I unsheathed my claws and howled. I then turned to Broady. I stared into his eyes as the others faught. He looked at me showing no mercy, his eyes were dark and his fur had looked dull. I whined gently under my breath and lunged at him. He threw me off, I yelped. I leaped onto him this time with rage and sank my claws deep into his shoulders, pinning him against the ground. I bit into his neck and tore out his fur. I  then raked my claws down his back. Staring into his eyes, he released his grip limply and his eyes closed, but he was still breathing. I lunged off, holding in my emotions. I had never looked into the eyes of an enemy and see mercy. All the other wolves were scared, few were still  laying on the ground. They were mostly all still alive. I dropped down, sitting silently thinking to myself. When will the fighting end? When will the blood not drip? When will the depression stop turning through my head, rolling around and around as I live everyday life. I heard a yelp and I turned. Zi was laying limp on the ground, her fur drenched in red. Dust flew from her fur. Sparky drooped her head, staring into Zi's eyes. She reached her paw up and closed Zi's eyes. She looked into my eyes, her depression showing through. She stared to the stars, then howled with sadness. I howled with her, our voices soulful. Coza joined in showing support.  Saying Goodbye    Sparky nudged Zi's body torward the white boulder, which we soon named the moonstone. Sadness peered through, as a whine gently came underbreath. Finally we howled in mourn for Zi, staring at the night sky wondering if Zi would come back. I lapped at her forehead and noticed she seemed empiter than before. Something was not right. I couldn't tell what it was, but I knew that she was not usually this light. Her spirit.. it was gone. I looked up at the stars and looked for the wolf constellation that my mum told me about when I was a pup. I found it, but there was a pup dangling now from the jaws of the mother wolf. I turned and looked at Zi. Her spirit just gave mother wolf a new pup. I wondered, who was this pup? Would I meet her? I didn't know but I felt clarity and hope that I would find this pup with Zi's spirit. Someway, somehow.... To Be Continued Till Next Season Text: something Images: something Editing: Me Translation: someone All rights reserved. Publication Date: July 1st 2013 https://www.bookrix.com/-skylar997
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-by-chanel-g-ashmon-and-ellie-a-willson-confessions-of-a-textaholic/
By: Chanel G. Ashmon, and Ellie A. Willson Confessions of a Textaholic a teen novel to all the -aholic's in the world who have overcome addiction. Characters Character-Actor/Actress-Description: Mitchie- Main Max- No phone guy Tyler- Ex-bf Trish- Mean girl Demi- BFF Elena- Textaholic friend Teacher- Textaholics anonymous counselor Leanne- Mom John- Dad Random Girl- Jk Girl Textaholics- Writers/Directors: Ellie and Chanel Scene one Setting: Room with chairs in a semi-circle like a school, filled with girls all texting, teacher in the front, Mitchie is at the edge of the circle of girls. There’s a sign on the door that says ‘Textaholics anonymous’. Mitchie: Hey, I’m Mitchie, and I’m a Textaholic (Everybody in the Textaholics meeting claps) All: You go girl, LYLAS Narration: These were my people. The textaholics (Everyone else starts introducing themselves, but Mitchie’s paying no attention, she’s busy texting. The name ‘Demi’ shows up on her Sidekick) Narration: Demi’s my best friend, but she can be a little…you know Txtaholic: Watt up? Demsgirl33X: @ bbq, hot guy 2 o clock Txtaholic: OMG! Wats his name? Demsgirl33X: Dunno, 2 scared 2 ask Txtaholic: is he tht hot? hand him the phone and I’ll ask Demsgirl33X: Ask him wat? How hot he is? R u insane?!?! Txtaholic: no his name, duh. Just how hot is this dude? Wat ev, I’m still ( bout Ty Demsgirl33X: Don’t b. he’s shit. I’m gonna send u a pic BRB!! ( Mitchie: Eeeeeee!!! (Squeal) (Glances up, and everybody is staring) (Mitchie quickly texts back, closes the phone, and puts it away) Teacher: Give me the phone, Mitchie. That goes for everybody. I know you have them with you! (Everybody sighs and groans as the teacher collects their phones) Teacher: C’mon Elena, hand it over (Elena tries to run out of the room, clutching her phone to her chest) Elena: No! No! Not my baby! Teacher: Okay, I won’t take it, okay? Just sit down and calm down (Making calming gestures) (Elena slowly sits down, cautiously, then breaths a sigh of relief) (The teacher quickly snatches the phone) Teacher: Ha! (Teacher goes to take phone from Random Girl, who holds it out then snatches it back) Random Girl: Jk! Sorry, lol, here (Snatches it back) Random Girl: Jk! Haha, im just kiddin, here (Tries to snatch it back, but teacher grabs it. They fight over it) Random Girl: J-J,-J, ahh! K… (Whining/crying on the ‘k’) (Teacher puts the phones in a bin. The girls start whispering, passing something around the circle of chairs) Elena: Tackle her, and we can get the phones back! (Whispering with a mischievous smile. Mitchie shrugs, and takes out a blackberry) Random Girl: 1…2…GO! (They all tackle the teacher and grab the phones except for Mitchie. Elena drops Mitchie’s sidekick on her lap, already immersed in texting) Narration: As you can see, I am still obsessed with texting even after what Tyler did. It all started last week… (Dream music, fade out) Scene two Setting: Mitchie’s room Txtaholic: watt up Trish? #1smxychick: rents grounded me. UGH!! Hate em Txtaholic: they let u keep ur cell? #1smxychick: Nope ( they 4got Txtaholic: Lucky, I’m cleaning my room ( #1smxychick: Ha-ha. Thts wat u get. Crap, g2g! ‘rent alert! Txtaholic: Biii ( Txtaholic: Watt up Ty? #1hottyboy: Nm, just thinking bout how I miss u Txtaholic: aw where r u? #1hottyboy: home, brb somebody @ door (Clock shows 15 minutes passing, with jeopardy music in background) #1hottyboy: Im back Txtaholic: did ya miss me? #1hottyboy: Um… I guess Txtaholic: U guess? Wats tht supposed 2 mean? #1hottyboy: nothing Txtaholic: So who was @ the door? #1hottyboy: Just some package Txtaholic: Tht took 15 min.? #1hottyboy: I had 2 open it 2, god, ur uptight 2day Txtaholic: Wat?! #1hottyboy: Jk, u noe, joking? Ever done tht b4? Txtaholic: Well nxt time don’t b so mean bout it k? I thot u were mad @ me! Don’t scare me like tht! #1hottyboy: well, g2g Txtaholic: But u just came back! Plz, im SO bored! #1hottyboy: yea, I kno u. can’t-breath-must-TXT! Txtaholic: Watch it! #1hottyboy: No, u watch it! Txtaholic: X-cuse me? #1hottyboy: Ugh, u noe wat? U wanna noe who was rly @ the door? Txtaholic: Wait, u lied 2 me? U r so gonna get it #1hottyboy: U wanna noe or wat? Txtaholic: Ugh, yes #1hottyboy: It was Trish, and u wanna kno wat she was doin? Kissing ME Txtaholic: WAT?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? We r SOOOOOOOO ovr!!!!!!!!!!!! (Throws phone, then whips it open her other phone) Narration: I was ready to curse Tyler out, but oh no, I was lucky enough to get a text from Trish, my EX-BFF! #1smxychick: Hey grl! Watts up? Txtaholic: Wats up? WATS UP?!?!?!?! UR DATING MY BF!!!!! Thts wats up!!! #1smxychick: Ex-bf (Throws phone against the wall, then runs to pick it up and respond) Txtaholic: And ur my ex-bff! Bitchy friend 4never! #1smexychick: God, don’t be such a drama queen Txtaholic: did I mention u were dating him while I still was! Major betrayal! #1smexychick: So? He was bored of u Txtaholic: can’t u c he’s so using u? u noe wat G2G biiiii BITCH (Phone on ground buzzes, Mitchie picks it up while dropping the other) #1hottyboy: I’m sry babe u kno I was jk, I would nvr do tht 2 u. I was just mad. 4give me? (Mitchie gags) Narration: I knew Tyler was lying, thanks-but-no-thanks to Trish. But for some reason I didn’t feel like sharing this precious bit of info with him… Txtaholic: Fine. U kno I can’t stay mad @ u #1hottyboy: Yea, I knew u would 4give me. I’ll wlk u 2 skool 2morrow (Fade out) Text: Chanel Ashmon and Ellie Wilson Images: cover image found online i do not own it. Editing: ellie ann willson Translation: none All rights reserved. Publication Date: August 5th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-curioucutie3
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-kiki-paul-pattyn-039-s-story/
Kiki Paul Pattyn's Story Life.. The Unexpected. Publication Date: July 27th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-loveislove
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-missy-heaven-stuck-in-hell/
Missy Heaven stuck in Hell January 1, 2011 Dear Diary, 6:30am- It’s my junior year… I haven’t written in a diary for about.. I would say since 6th grade.. But I don’t know who else I can talk to about… about certain things. I can’t talk to either of my parents… or my siblings, because.. they would think im just being a drama queen… I don’t wanna talk about it to my friends, because they will just say no it’s not true… but it is… im not a drama queen… this is how I’ve been living my life… its hard, and I hate it. as much as I try to change… nothing changes. I’ve been trying so hard, but… I can’t be skinny. I can’t be like all the other gorgeous girls in my school… I’m fat and im always going to be… No matter how hard I try… this is who I am and no one will get to know the real me… they just see what appears on the outside… `Neveah January 2, 2011 Dear Diary, 7:00am- It’s my second day of being a junior… Yesterday was my first day of school… it was just… it was horrible… I didn’t even tell you about it when I got home, because as soon as I got home I just went to sleep. the first day I was late to my first class because I couldn’t find it. When I did I opened the door, and when I saw the desks my stomach churned. The desks where so tiny! It wasn’t right… I mean these desks looked for petite people. Everyone was looking at me, and I walked to the only desk that I saw that was open which was the first desk. I went to go sit in the desk and I barely fit. I kept my head down, and I felt terrible. I felt the eyes on me, and I bit my lip because I didn’t want the tears to come out. I know im fat, and I need to lose weight, and I try sooooooo hard to lose the weight but it never leaves ): I’ve been fat for as long as I can remember, and trust me… I HATE IT! after the first day I was going to my next class, and as I was walking down the stairs I heard someone yell out, “ What have you been eating?!” I ignored it and continued on to my next class, but I felt like I was going to break down right there. The rest of the day no one really talked to me except for my friends. My one friend, my best friend actually, Mandy, she is kind. She is always trying to cheer me up, but she just will never understand the things I go through. My last class I had… I sit in the back corner and the boy that sits in front of me is so cute. I don’t really know him. I had some classes with him last year too, but he has never noticed me. Why would he? One of his friends sat next to him, and I heard him mutter, “ Look you get to sit in front of the cow.” I kept my head down and pretended I didn’t hear anything, and even if I did it didn’t affect me. but on the inside I was screaming. I was screaming for it all to just be over. well.. I have to go to school now… Let’s see if maybe… just maybe this day will be better than yesterday? 4:30pm- My second day went past… It wasn’t as bad as yesterday I guess… but it still wasn’t great. I am five foot, 3 inches and I am two hundred and fifty pounds. I have long dark brown hair, and green eyes. my skin is rather pale. I’m not pretty, and nothing about me is attractive. All the girls in my school are so gorgeous. The way the guys look at them… I wish for once in my life a guy will look at me like that. That I can be the girl every guy wants to date and every girl wants to be. I wish I could be wanted… my older sister Kristy is completely gorgeous… She is twenty two and she is absolutely stunning. People wonder how we are sisters. She is skinny, and she has the bust and the butt. She has long light brown hair with blonde highlights and radiant hazel eyes. I’m so jealous of her. I hate standing next to her, because then I feel just as horrible about myself. My mom is a very pretty woman too. Her and my sister look a lot alike. My dad… he isn’t ever around. He is always out with his friends and when he is home he stays upstairs and he is just a stranger living in my home. I have a brother that is a year younger than me. He likes to be with my sister and show her off, but he doesn’t like to be around me when others are around. He is embarrassed of me. I know it. I am embarrassed of myself… I hear my mom calling for me… I have to go… `Nevaeh January 5, 2011 Dear Diary, 4:00am- I can’t sleep… I haven’t written in you for the past couple days… I haven’t really done anything the past couple days… I just want to stay to myself… everyone is hurting me… I don’t think I can stand one more day of being called ugly or fat. I CANT take it >:P I had a dream… I had a dream that I was skinny and I was beautiful. That people wanted to be seen with me, and that a boy loved me. I had my first kiss, and he had his arm around me. It felt… I felt… happy. Then I woke up, and the feeling of being happy washed away when I realized I was still me. I’ve never truly felt happy before… but the feeling I had in my dream.. it was amazing. I want… I NEED to feel it again. Maybe if I go to sleep forever, I’ll always be happy. 5:48 pm School once again was a disaster. I was in health class, and on a poster it said, “ Judging a person does not define who they are, if defines who you are.” When I read it, I didn’t feel too bad. It actually, kind of made me a little happy. Until we started talking eating disorders, and obesity was one of them. I kid sitting across from me turned around and looked dead at me. That little trying to make me feel better poster, it went right out the window. You know, I try to eat a healthy meal, diet whatever. I exercised once. A lot. I ate right, but I didn’t lose the weight. For me, it’s impossible. Yeah, people are like, no its not impossible, stop being the fat girl that is trying to make everyone feel bad. I don’t want anyone to feel bad for me, I want them to hear me, but first I need to learn how to speak up… HA! Like that ever going to happen… Well… I don’t feel like writing too much. Gonna do my homework, and go to sleep. Bye diary, thanks for listening… P.S Some people called me fat, ugly, you know the same old. Nothing really new, just thought I’d tell you really fast. `Nevaeh Publication Date: March 13th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-animefreak1201
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-lev-tolstoy-war-and-peace/
Lev Tolstoy War and Peace Publication Date: October 22nd 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-albiorix
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-elizabeth-fritz-lost-love/
elizabeth fritz lost love to me chapter 1 : the beginning walked down the stairs of my house, and picked up the keys to my black Volvo, and shook it by the key ring so that all of the things stuck to it rattled. “Are you gonna get up now?” I asked my 14 year old brother Justin. “Yeah” was his small reply, and he got up and headed outside, and we were on our way to the first day of a new year to school. My mother is a very good lawyer, and father owns a few companies and also writes books. Both very attractive and intelligent. My older brother, Paul, left for college on a scholarship. And Justin, is an all rounder, and captain of his swim team. I, Shannon, myself am a 16 year old, gets high grades and all guys fall at my feet, head cheerleader and popular, but single, I’m waiting for the right guy. I parked her car in an empty space, and both of us headed to the building, and I went to my locker. “Shann!” I hear a familiar voice go. “Em!” I say back at my best friend Emily, in the same expression, and soon we were in each other’s arms, “wow, I missed you so much!” I said, glad to see her again, she wasn’t a cheerleader like me, she was in the school drama things and got lead parts, and she had a boyfriend, Dan, who is pretty good looking and also takes part in the school plays. “Oh me too, how was you holiday?” she wanted to know. “Um, it was… interesting” I shrugged, “and tiring. And yours?” “Oh, with my grandparents it’s always the same! Stay home and do their chores, and look after Gramps’ farm” she told me, and I listened, and nodded, and then Dan showed up with us. “Hey girls!” he said with a grin forming across his face, he hadn’t changed at all. “Oh, hi Dan” I smiled, as he walked towards us, and put his arm around Emily. “Hey Dan!” Emily said happily, pulling him into a hug, “I missed you.” “I missed you too baby” he said, and no sooner they were making out. So I smiled at their happiness and walked away, with my favourite book under my nose as I walked. And there was a bump, and I looked up to see a new and beautiful face of a guy, maybe a little older than me. “Sorry!” we both apologised at the same time and then a second later we were both chuckling. “Oh, hi I’m Shannon,” I said smiling. “Hey, and I’m Luke, and new here.” He informed. “Oh, Luke” I said, “I’m guessing you’re a senior.” “Oh, yeah, senior” he sighed. “Right” I said “do you have anyone to show you around?” “Uh, no” he said. “Mind if I?” I offered. “Not at all” was his response. He smiled down at me, he was pretty tall and I could swear he had a six pack under that shirt of his. “So…” he started as we were walking, “what book were you reading?” He looked curious to know. “Oh this?” I raised it up to show him, “I’m reading Gone with the wind, I’ve read it like 5 times.” I said. “Oh, cool! One of my favourites as well” he said, impressed. “You read?” I asked surprised, “Not many guys do around here, but that’s great.” “Yeah, I’m not from around here,” he said to me “reading is one of my best hobbies” “Oh, awesome, me too!” I said “I mean about reading.” With that we got to his class and I had to leave for mine. My first period was English with Emily and Daniel. I walked into class, and the second bell hadn’t rung yet. Emily was sitting on her usual desk, and I sat on mine right next to her. Dan was at the back with his other friends. Emily smirked as I sat down. “What?” I asked, settling down in my seat. “Who was that guy you walked away with?” she asked quietly, but very curiously. “Oh, Luke, he’s a new guy, a senior.” I said plainly. “A senior?” her eyes widened. “Wow, Shann you think he’s the one?” “Emily! I just met him!” I explained to her. “But he is quite cute.” She didn’t seem to get it. So I nodded and the second bell rang and we got to our English work. And then lunchtime came. We headed out for the cafeteria, me and Michael. Michael is another friend if mine, he once told me about his crush on me, but he wasn’t ‘the one’ so, I guess he got over it… but we’re cool. He had even changed over the summer, I noticed he had worked out a little now, as I could see his buffed up body. He actually looked pretty good. And when we got there I got to meet up with my other friends. See in our school, we don’t have any cliques. No popular table, or Chess club table, or the computer geek table, we were all equal with each other. So anyway, I met up with my friends and we all sat down. Everyone made a topic to discuss with the people sitting close to them, when I spotted him. Luke was sitting at a table with some guys that were also seniors. And those guys weren’t just any normal seniors. They were the angels as some obsessed girls would call them. Josh and Will, They were the school stars, the president and vice president of the student government. All girls would do anything just to make them at least look their way or something. I didn’t see why though, I mean yeah, they might be very good looking and good in studies and had many extra curricular things, but still… So, anyway Luke was just sitting and laughing with them and his eyes caught mine and he gave me this breath taking smile. I couldn’t help but to smile back, and then Josh and Will glanced my way. Did I mention that Josh and Will were friends of mine? Come to think of it, the whole school was a friend to me. So when they saw me they smiled as well, and I could sense some jealousy spreading around in the room. I gave them all a little wave and just then Luke signalled me to go and join them, and so I did. Luke patted the seat next to him, for me to sit. I smiled and took a seat next to him. “Hey” I looked at them “Luke, so I see you have met Will and Josh?” I said casually. “Oh yeah,” he said looking over to them. “Hey! Shannon!” Will greeted “What’s up?” From Josh. “Nothing really guys, so how was your vacation?” I asked. And the conversation carried on… Soon enough lunch was also over and we rushed to our next classes, I could see that Emily had a lot of questions for me, but I was grateful that the next two classes I didn’t have with her. I just waited for school to end.   home warming  The final bell rang, and I rushed outside, and went up to my car. A few feet away, I could see my brother talking to his girlfriend. Even though he’s just fourteen he has a girlfriend, and I’ve told this to him a number of times, but my parents don’t seem to mind too much, as if they mind anything. They said their goodbyes and he came over smiling. I rolled my eyes, and we drove home, this was all we said to each other: Me: “Hey, why are you so happy?” Him: “Never mind” Me: “Okay…” Him: “Yeah” Me: “Weirdo...” Him: “Moron” Me: *Rolls my eyes* Him: *shakes his head* Yeah. That’s pretty much it, but I found out he had a date with little miss sunshine. So we got home and I did my homework. Then my mom called me downstairs. “Honey, do you mind going to our new neighbour’s housewarming party? We were invited but none of us can make it, would you go for us?” She asked in her motherly voice. “Um, sure, I guess, since I have nothing better to do, but why not Justin?” I wanted to know. “He’s going out tonight, with that sweet Angela girl” she said, “so I want you to go.” I sighed and nodded, “sure, whatever.” I got ready for the little occasion next door and got downstairs, to see my dad. “Oh hey dad” I greeted. “Hello darling, listen, I’ll come with you to the party for a little while, I’m not that busy, and surely I want to meet my new neighbours.” He said smiling. “Oh okay then, let’s go” I said stepping out the house. We went outside and walked over next door. I saw a car that I’m I saw earlier today… but it is a small world I guess. So we were politely welcomed in the crammed up house. My dad found some company of a man around his own age, and they started a conversation. I just stood there, bored, and someone tapped my shoulder from behind. I turned around. “What a pleasant surprise to see you are our new neighbours” He said grinning. “Oh Luke, you moved here? That’s great!” I said pretty surprised to see him here, myself. “Well yeah, that’s why I’m here actually” he said. I laughed, even though I don’t think that was a joke… “So, wanna get outta this crammed place?” he insisted. “You bet I do” I smirked. It was really crowded in that area where the door was, and he held out a hand. “Take my hand, so we won’t get lost,” he said, smiling. And just as I did, I felt I wave of electricity flow through my blood, and tingle my bones. He led us to the main entrance and we walked outside. He didn’t let go of my hand, and I didn’t mind at all, actually he didn’t mind either because we kept walking hand in hand. “Where are we going?” I asked giggling. He smiled, “wherever you want to.” “I don’t mind…”I said because I really didn’t. “How about the park down the road?” He suggested. “Sounds great to me” I said truthfully. He nodded and led the way there. And when we got there he let go of my hand, and the emptiness that had vanished at his touch, came back. I rubbed the hand that he held, it was still warm. He took a seat on a nearby bench, “sit down now, will you?” he asked me. “Okay,” I said and sat down beside him on the wooden old bench. He started to hum something, and I smiled politely, not interrupting. “Sing me something” he asked, looking at me, “please? I would love to hear your voice.” I shook my head smiling, “I don’t have one!” I explained. “Of course you do, everyone has a voice, that is, unless you’re mute.” He shrugged. “Okay, what do you want me to sing?” I asked, knowing that I will embarrass myself. “Uh, the song from Titanic,” he said. “That song? You like it?” I asked. “Yeah, one of my favourites,” “Oh me too!” “Really? Then you should know the words, now sing” “Okay,” I cleared my voice. And started to sing. “Every night in my dreams, I see you, I feel you, that is how I k know you, go on …” He listened very carefully while I kept singing it. “… Love can touch us one time, and live for a life time, and never let go till, we’re gone…” I went on. He was enjoying the song, as he joined along at some parts. “Where ever you are, I believe that, my heart does go on…” he sang this with me, with a beautiful voice. “You’re here, there’s nothing I fear, and I know that…” I felt really confident in myself now, that he was singing with me, not caring who walked by. “We’ll stay, forever this way and I know that my heart will go on and on…” and then we ended the song. I could see his eyes sparkling, and mine filled with water, I always felt sad after listening to it, it reminded me of the movie. “You’re a very good singer, Shannon” He complimented. “I’m not near as good as you are, you should like, be in a band!” I suggested. “Oh, I am, I love music” he said, with a smile. “You do? That’s wonderful! I play the violin” I told him. “Wow, I play the piano, and guitar.” He said. “You are very talented now.” I was impressed. “And I’m lead singer.” He said. “Okay, okay, enough showing off!” I joked. He laughed, “Yeah, alright.” After that we did some more singing. “Oh, it’s getting late.” I said looking at my watch, and I wish I didn’t… “Yeah, lets head back home, we should hang around more often don’t you think?” He asked looking at me. “Totally, you’re very fun to be with” I said to him, “and I don’t lie” and that wasn’t a lie. We walked back to our street, and he even walked me to my house door. “Hey, thanks Luke, nice house warming party” I said smiling. “Yeah I bet the house is really warm” He said jokingly, and I laughed, “You’re welcome, all the time” he smiled his dazzling, breath taking one and then he put his hand on my shoulder. At his touch, again I felt the same way, the emptiness filled with joy. He patted it gently. “Good night” He said softly. “’Night” I replied, and he took his hand away. And the feeling went away, once more. “See you later” he said as her walked away. I waved and entered my house. really  Everyone was sleeping, except Justin. He was watching TV so I sat next to him. “Hey,” “Hey” He said back. “So, how was your date with that girl?” “Angela?” “Yeah whatever” “Good, it was good.” I got bored and went to my favourite room of the house, the Study. It was filled with my favourite books, and I would often come here, even to just think things through. I sat down with my book, on one of the chairs, and peered through the window. That was his room. And he was there. Right before my eyes, Luke was standing in the middle of his room (which was clean!) topless! That was a sight to see now, and I was right about the six pack… Anyway the thing is he saw me. But he wasn’t mad or anything… he smiled, it took him a moment to realise that he was standing there topless. The he turned into a scarlet red colour and quickly pulled on a shirt. I laughed, covering my mouth and shaking my head. He took out his own book and started to read it, on his bed. I glanced out the window every now and then and he did as well, because we caught each other doing it at the same time. But soon he fell asleep. And I walked to my room. I had to text Emily about everything; she would die if I didn’t tell her. I took out my phone from my pocket and sent Emily a text message about everything. After a few minutes I saw her reply: Omigod!! That is sooo romantic!! You guys are totally meant for each other! Isn’t that right?! Omg omg omg!!! I’m so sure he is the one! I rolled my eyes at her text but couldn’t help smiling, and then I sent her back: I don’t think so Em, calm down, I don’t think we’re more than just friends in this case, hey I g2g bye! ‘Night! I changed into my Pyjama’s and drifted to sleep. I woke up after a good eight hours of sleep, and jumped into the shower. I got ready for school, and went downstairs. Justin was munching his cereal. I swallowed a glass of O.J and gobbled down some toast. Then we drove to school in my car, and again we didn’t speak much: Me: “So how’s the swim team going?” Him: “It’s fine.” Me: “Oh okay.” Him: “Right.” Me: “Why don’t you speak much Justin? Everything OK?” Him: “I’m a man with few words.” Me: “Oh yeah? I think a few is exaggerating.” And that’s pretty much it. I mean he used to be better like two months ago. Whatever. So we got to school, and he walked away with all his friends who were waiting for him, and I walked over to my locker. I grabbed my books and hurried away, but I ran into somebody, and my books and I fell down. I reached over to grab them, and he bent down. “Hey, oh sorry,” Michael Apologised. “Oh, its fine Michael” I reassured. “No, no it’s not, are you hurt?” He wanted to know. “I’m okay,” “Let me make it up to you” “What do you mean?” I asked. “I’ll take you out Friday night.” He said. Oh no… “I… have plans, sorry” I lied. “That can wait, I’ll be there at 7 o’clock sharp” He said and smiled. Then he left. I couldn’t not go, that would just be mean, and he just wants to take out a friend, so what? Anyway, soon it was lunch time. I walked to the cafeteria with Emily and Dan, and we sat at our table. I saw Luke come along, and I invited him over with us. He sat down beside me. “Hi” I greeted “Hey” he said smiling “I heard you’re going out with Michael now.” Wow, things go around this school faster than you can say Cotton Candy. Oh whatever. “Oh, um yeah, he’s taking me out on Friday. But we’re not going out.” I said quickly. He just smiled and nodded, and I rolled my eyes. The bell rung, after a while for the last two classes. I went to the class and sat next to Emily. She looked curious. I sighed, “What is it now Em?” She raised her eyebrow, “You’re going out with Michael Peters?” She asked shocked. Word really travels fast in this school I thought, “He’s just taking me out Friday night, that’s all.” I explained. “You told me that you didn’t like him. You said he wasn’t the one!” “Emily! He’s not The One, okay? He just made me fall and he’s making up for that, that’s all!” “Um, right, and pigs can fly.” She said sarcastically, “Why did you agree to go then?” “Well, I told him I had plans but he wouldn’t take no as an answer, so I’ll just have to go” I said, and just before she could say anything else, the teacher came in. nightmares  The next day was Friday and I was excited to know that the first week of school was already over. But the excitement ended when I remembered that I would have to deal with Michael that day. I went down for breakfast, and Justin wasn’t there. There was a note stuck to the refrigerator with magnets. It read: Shannon, I’m taking the bus today, I have to be at school early for my swimming practise. Oh and I hope you refilled the gas for your car. Justin. Oh crap! I forgot all about that! I mean the car. Oh well, I could walk to school today. I headed outside and started walking, when I heard a familiar voice. “Hey” Luke said. “Oh, hi Luke” I smiled his way. “I see you need a ride?” he offered. “Oh, um, no, I need to walk today” I said. “What? Its freezing out here, I don’t think you can make it, you’re coming with me.” He said and I had no choice but to follow him because he was right, it was freezing. I got into the passenger seat beside him and thanked him as he started to drive. We were silent for a few minutes, but he broke it then. “Um, Shannon, can I ask you a question?” he looked a little nervous. “Sure, ask away!” I said, wanting to know his question. “Uh, I really like someone, and I don’t know what to do about it, what do you think I should do?” he asked now, turning slightly red. My heart sank a little, “Oh, just tell that someone how you feel about them, and, uh, wait for what happens next I suppose…” I said, after a minute. “Okay,” he smiled, “Thanks.” “Anytime.” I replied, and he parked the car. We both got out and headed to the building. I needed to stop at the girl’s room, for some time. By the time I got out, I saw Kelly grinning near by my locker. I walked over to her. “Hey Kelly,” I said, opening my locker. She didn’t even greet me; she just went “You’ll never guess what!” “What?” I asked half interested. “Luke just asked me out” she said all joyfully, while my mouth hung open. Why would he choose Kelly? “Um, that’s great, really” I said, and she smiled and walked away. Later on I met up with Emily. “Hey Em” I greeted. “Hi Shann, why the long face?” she asked. Dan was right next to her as usual. They couldn’t last a moment without each other; I don’t know how they lasted all summer. I glanced up at him and back at her. “I don’t know” I said. She shrugged, “Okay, well Dan and I need to get to class now, we’ll catch you later.” She said and pulled Dan along with her to class. Michael came up to me. I wouldn’t know what to say or do. “Hey Shannon,” He smiled. “Oh hey Michael.” I said. “Hope you didn’t forget about our plans tonight,” he reminded me, again. “Yes, thanks for reminding me or else I totally forgot about it all.” I said to him. “Oh, okay, remember 7 o’clock sharp.” He said and he left. I didn’t know how anything could get worse, well; I didn’t know why I felt so bad after all. About Luke I mean, I should be happy for him, but there was one problem. I’m not happy. Had I really fell in for this guy who I have only known for a couple of days? Maybe I did, but who can control who they fall in love with? Not me. I was really down in the next classes, and even the teachers had noticed that. The bell rang for something I didn’t want to face right now. Lunch. Emily met up with me, for the first time without Dan. “Oh hey Emy.” I greeted. “What’s gotten into you?” She asked. “Um, why do you ask?” “First of all, you looked like you just swallowed a sock, and second, we stopped calling each other by what our parents do, Shanny” She said, with extra emphasis on my parents old nickname for me. “Em! Sorry, not in public, I forgot. Oh and I don’t know why I look like I swallowed a sock, okay?” I said. Then we got into the cafeteria and I saw Luke and Kelly sitting separately. Then we sat down at our usual tables and anyone sat with us. “Hello,” Luke said, sitting down beside me. “Oh, hey.” I replied. “I asked Kelly out.” He told. “Did you?” I asked plainly. “Um, she already told you didn’t she..,” “No, no, not just me, by now I think everyone knows.” I replied. “Oh, okay then.” He said, “Do you need a ride home?” he asked politely. I thought about it, “Sure, why not.” I said then. He joined in a conversation with someone else, and in a bit the bell rang, and it was almost the end of the day. The next two classes I had a double period, and it was with Emily. I sat down beside her in class, and the teacher came in behind me and started lecturing about some random stuff, which I couldn’t bother listening to. I soon got a note from Emily. I heard about Luke and Kelly today. I passed one back: That’s old news now, Em. Is that why you are so down today? Seriously, Em, I don’t know, and I have to pay attention now so, please stop. Then we stopped passing notes, and the class finally ended. Emily, Dan and I walked outside together silently. I waved them goodbye and Luke’s car came by. I could see Luke in it, driving, and beside him was grinning Kelly. I smiled and hopped into the back seat. “Hey guys” I said. “Hi Shannon” Kelly said from in front of me. The conversation went like this: Luke: “So how was school today?” Kelly: “It was so good actually, one of the best! I didn’t even get in trouble for wearing this skirt today!” Me: “Fine.” Luke: “Oh, right, I bet you’re excited today Shannon.” Me: “Sure.” Kelly: “Why would she be excited today?” Luke: “Because she’s…” Me: (continuing what he was going to say) “…going out with a friend.” And then the car stopped in front of Kelly’s house. We all waved goodbye as she left. Then it was just us two, Luke and I. The rest of the ride was mostly silent. I knew I had a lot to tell, but absolutely nothing to say. On the way, he put on some classical music, my favourites. He was singing along, his voice naturally beautiful. I also knew for sure we had the same taste in music. And in books, because that’s what we talked about the rest of the way, when there was nothing to say, and I took out Gone with the Wind. Him: “Have you read Wuthering Heights?” Me: “Who hasn’t?” Him: “A lot of people, it’s also one of my favourites.” Me: “I like it too.” Him: “How about Harry Potter?” Me: “Uh, no way! I know its good and all, but not my type.” Him: “Oh I was just testing you, I haven’t read it either.” Me: “Oh, so have you read Pride and Prejudice?” Him: “Ah, that was a very good story, I just finished it.” Me: “Oh cool, I read it like a month ago.” And that was about it. It could’ve carried on, if we weren’t parked right outside our houses. We both got out and headed for our own houses. “Bye!” He called. I smiled and waved. After I was done with everything I checked the time. 6.26 pm… the night out I went downstairs, where my mom and dad were sitting at the table, enjoying a nice cup of coffee, and Justin was sitting on the couch watching television. “I’m going out tonight.” I said to them. Dad nearly choked on his coffee, my mom looked surprised and Justin moved his eyes away from the TV screen and looked at me. “With who?” Mom was the first to speak then. “Oh, just a friend…” I replied. “Oh that narrows it down.” Justin said from all the way over where he was sitting. “Michael. Michael Peters.” I told them all. “Oh, that handsome lad, okay.” Mom said and dad looked at her with his eyebrow raised. “That dude’s on my swimming team as well, and in basketball.” From Justin. Dad just nodded. “Yeah, he’ll be here at 7.” I said. “Okay, then you go off and get ready.” Mom said and took a sip of her coffee. I went back upstairs and pulled out some casual clothes of mine: A violet blouse and off white Capri’s. Then I put on a pair of my black Converse shoes. I brushed my short hair and put on some hairpins. A little makeup and earrings, and I went downstairs, with my handbag. The doorbell rang at exactly 7.00, just as he said. I answered him, “Oh, so you weren’t kidding when you said 7 o’clock sharp” I smiled. He smiled back, looking at what I was wearing. “No I wasn’t, and you look great.” He complimented. “Thanks,” I said and looked at what he was wearing, a black t shirt with the peace sign on it, and blue jeans with sneakers. “You don’t look that bad yourself” I said. “Oh, thanks.” He said, “And let’s go now,” he said, stepping back. I followed him and he led me to a shiny, silver motor bike. “Whoa, we’re riding on this?” I asked surprised. He smiled, “Don’t worry, its pretty fun” he said and it was. He gave me a helmet, and put one on himself. “Now, hop on.” He said. And I did what I was told. He sat behind, his arms were supporting me as he held the steering handle bars, and I held on to something as well. He pushed on the accelerator and away we went. “Not so bad now is it?” he said, loud enough for me to hear. I noticed he was really close to me. “No, it’s pretty cool! I said. I noticed where we were going. It was my favourite café where I love to go to. He stopped the bike, and I got off, while he parked it. He took his helmet off and helped me take mine, and put them away. The he chuckled. “What?” I wanted to know. “Oh, nothing,” he said and smoothed down my hair, which I bet was sticking up, and blushed a little. “Let’s go now, shall we?” he said and I nodded, taking his arm. He led us inside, and we went to the main area to order. “May I help you?” asked the person behind the counter. “Uh, yeah.” He said to him, and turned to me, “What do you want?” That wasn’t really hard to answer; I only liked one thing most in this café. “I’ll take cappuccino with cocoa powder sprinkled on top.” I said. He nodded and looked back at the man, “two of those please.” He said, and he nodded. We got our drinks, and sat at a table for two. I didn’t know what to say and it looked like he didn’t either. “So, how is your cheerleading going?” He asked. “Oh, it’s just fine.” I said. “Oh okay,” “Yeah and how is your swimming and basketball going?” I asked. He smiled, “How did you know that?” “I have my ways,” I said, but when he looked confused, I added: “My brother told me.” He nodded, “That Justin dude huh?” “Justin, yeah.” “He doesn’t speak much does he?” He asked “Um, no not really, he says that he’s a man with few words.” “Ha, I think even a few is exaggerating!” “Hey, I said exactly the same thing to him!” I said, surprised. “Did you really? That proves we have something in common!” he said with a suspicious grin. I laughed a little, because there was nothing else I could do. “Yeah I guess we do!” We finished our drinks, and then headed out to the door, but this time he held onto my hand. It didn’t feel the same way when Luke had touched me, but it felt good enough that I didn’t stop him. He led me all the way back to his bike, and handed me a helmet, and then the same as before, he started to drive towards my place. On the way, again, his face had been pretty close to mine, so that if I turned my head a little to the right, our faces would be touching. I pretty much tried to avoid that. Although I was thankful we were wearing helmets, so that couldn’t be entirely possible. When we got to our street, he parked it away from my house. “Come on, I’ll walk you safely home.” He insisted, and I didn’t argue because it was getting kind of dark anyway. Things weren’t gonna get any better. This time, instead of my hand, he had slipped his arm around my waist. I did feel rather uncomfortable while walking, but it would be rude if I just walked away. So I let him keep it there. Then thankfully we were close to my house. I was about to tell him that I could take it from here, but he pulled me right in front of him, and I couldn’t escape. He was holding me so that I couldn’t even move, but he didn’t hurt me. I just looked at him in a confused way. Then he started to speak. “Now, Listen to me,” he started, “and don’t interrupt.” I nodded. “I know that you don’t feel the same way about me that I do about you, but I have changed,” He went on. I didn’t know what he was talking about. “Just try me, please; I’m really not that bad.” He said then waited for me to respond. I was not in my thinking mode, and my brain was switched off, so I didn’t quite get it. “Michael, what do you mean?” I asked. He looked slightly annoyed, “You know what I’m talking about, Shannon, just try me, I wont make such a bad boyfriend.” That’s when it hit me; I didn’t know how to reply to that. So I just said what popped right out of my mouth, “Well, okay, I’ll try you.” His face filled with happiness and joy, and then I noticed what I had said. I just agreed to go out with a guy, who is not The One! And then, I was about to tell him that I didn’t mean to say that, and I was about to blurt out all the truth, but he spoke before me. “This really means a lot to me, thanks Shannon.” He said, and then I felt that I should at least give him a chance, who knows maybe I’ll learn to love him… That was when he leaned down to my face and his lips, very gently, touched mine. He was kissing me. And I wasn’t kissing back. Or maybe I was, just a little though. I’ll admit it, he’s a good kisser. So sue me! But he stopped, very quickly; I guess he didn’t want to get too carried away on our first kiss. He grinned at me, and I blushed, “Well, uh, good night.” I said to him, and he started walking backwards, still smiling, “Peace out!” He called with his two fingers raised. It really matched what he was wearing, but I kept that comment to myself. I rushed inside then, still in shock. “Hey, how was your err, night out?” My mom asked. “It’s okay; you can call it a date now.” I told her and she looked surprised. “Aw! Sweetie, you already found The One for you! How sweet!” She looked really excited, because her only daughter has her first boyfriend. “I don’t know.” I admitted and stomped up the stairs. I sat on my bed, with my cell phone clutched in my hands, wondering if I should tell Emily or not. I decided I would tell her. Em, I’m just gonna come right out and say it I text messaged, I agreed to go out with Michael. Then I hit send. I knew already how her reply would be, and I was right: YOU DID!?!?! OMG OMG OMG OMG!!! I KNEW HE WAS THE ONE FOR YOU!! AND ITS SOOO GOOD THAT DAN AND HE ARE GREAT FRINEDS SO NOW WE CAN LIKE, GO ON DOUBLE DATES!! OOH THIS IS GONNA BE SO COOL!!! Now I decided that I wouldn’t go into the detailed parts…: Em! Calm down. I really don’t know if he’s the one, but I’m still giving him a chance, he really wanted to go out with me…and yeah, I guess we could go on double dates but I don’t know... I waited a few minutes for her reply; I could tell it was going to be a long one… Yay!! I’m so happy!!! This is gonna be so cool!! You just see, everything will be the way it should be!! OMG! I still can’t believe that Michael Peters of all people was the one you chose!! I thought you guys were just friends!! But anyway who cares!! But you know, I think that Luke guy shouldn’t be going out with Kelly, no offence but I think he’s more your type… but don’t get me wrong Shann, I’m not complaining! Everybody lives happily ever after now!!! Yep. And this was my very long and complex reply: Sure. Yeah, that’s all, just a simple Sure. And then I was sleepy so I went to sleep, without bothering to check her reply. I just hoped that all this was just a nightmare. y ?  I woke up late on Saturday morning, knowing that everything was a nightmare. I was so relieved that I was just dreaming. I picked up my cell and had a message from Emily. CALL ME LATER! Bye! Then it all came back to me that it wasn’t a dream after all. I sighed and went to the bathroom. I got all ready, and went downstairs, where my brother was eating his cereal, half sleeping. I rolled my eyes at him and I had some cereal myself. Later on, I called Emily. She picked up. “Hello?” she said through the phone. “Oh hey Em, you wanted me to call?” I asked. “Shannon! Was I dreaming or are you and Michael going out?!” she wanted to know. “I thought I was dreaming too, but it’s all real.” “Oh My God! Okay, let’s, um, meet at the park, in like a half hour?” “Sounds great.” I said. “Okay, bye!” she said and hung up. I was all ready anyway, so I decided to walk outside for a bit. To my surprise, Luke was doing the same thing. I smiled and waved at him. “Hey! Shannon!” he said, walking over to me, “what’s up.” “Oh, nothing, I’m meeting with Emily in a bit, that’s all.” I shrugged. “Really? Okay.” He said. “Yeah, what are you doing?” I asked. “Nothing, just walking around.” He replied. “So, uh, I heard that you’re going out with Michael now…” he said in an expression that I couldn’t get. “How… did you know?” I asked curiously. “Oh I looked through the window and saw you guys making out.” He replied. I blushed bright pink, “we were so not making out!” I snapped. “Okay, whatever you say…” he shrugged. “I’m serious, we really weren’t! I just agreed to go out with him last night and he said he was happy, and it was just a simple goodnight kiss, that’s all!” I explained. “Yeah, I get it, okay.” He said. I nodded, “Good, um, I better get going now…” I said, although there was some time left. “What’s the rush?” he wanted to know. “No rush.” I told. “Okay, then hang around for a bit.” “Um, don’t you have any plans with Kelly?” I accidentally asked. I really didn’t mean it in a bad way, but I guess that’s how he took it. “Well, now that you mention it, I’ll just make some.” He said, not too nicely. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that, I was just asking…” I felt guilty. “Okay, just forget it, see you around” he said and left. I hoped he wasn’t mad at me or anything, I really did. After a while, I began walking towards the park, and met up with Emily. “Hey Em” I greeted her. “Hey Shann! So, how do you feel about all of this?” she asked. “Um, fine I guess.” I replied. She laughed, “Okay, whatever!” “So what do you wanna do now?” I asked. And just then there were a pair of hands over my eyes. “Guess who!” The disguised voice said. “Orlando Bloom? Please be Orlando Bloom!” I begged jokingly. “Close enough” Michael smirked, uncovering my eyes. “Oh hey Michael” I smiled, and turned to Emily, I guessed that Dan was with him because he was standing with her already. “Hello Shannon, what a surprise to see you here” he said. “Yeah, we don’t come here much” I shrugged. “Oh, but we do” He said, glancing at Dan. “Cool.” I said. “Why don’t we all do something?” Dan insisted. “Good idea!” Emily said nodding. “Yeah” Michael agreed. I smiled and nodded, “But what can we do?” “Hmm, that’s a hard question” Dan said. “Let’s just… walk around at the beach?” Emily suggested. “Okay” I said, and everyone else agreed. We started walking towards the beach. Dan was holding Emily’s hand, and Michael was holding my waist. This time I felt more confident and relaxed. We all had nothing to talk about on the way there. “So, uh, you guys go to the park every weekend?” I asked the boys. “Not just the weekends…” Michael said grinning. “When ever we have time to, we always go there” Dan finished off. “Since we were like, 14, we used to go there to check out the lady’s” Michael said, still grinning. From the corner of my eye I could see Dan was blushing lightly. “You didn’t have to add that detail,” Dan said when nobody else said anything. “Yeah, Michael, it’s not like we wanted to know that!” I teased. “Oh, but I thought you might, because you know, you’re my girlfriend now, and they like to know these things…” He said. I smiled, “Well, I suppose, but I’m okay with it.” I admitted, and he smiled. Then for the second time he leaned his face down to kiss me. And this time I reached up the rest of the way and kissed him back, the way I’m supposed to. I could tell that Dan and Emily were trying not to notice us. His arm was still wrapped around me when we pulled apart. I put my own arm on his back. None of us said anything until we got to the beach. “Oh look we’re here!” I said looking at the blue sea. “Yeah let’s go!” Emily said, walking faster. We all tried to keep up with her. It was so peaceful, walking on the beach. And nobody even said much, so I guess they all agreed. Then we decided to take a few steps in the water. I just didn’t realise that I was taking a few steps closer to… Death… “Hey lets go into the water, good thing we’re wearing shorts!” Emily said to me. “Yeah okay!” I said and followed her in. It feels good, water splashing just below your knees. I turned around for a second, to see what the guys were doing. They were just standing on the sand, talking. The next minute I was blacked out. So a big wave knocked me down, and then took me back into the ocean, with my head under water. And the next I knew when I woke up, that someone was giving me the kiss of life. I mean, what are the chances that you wake up and there is someone with their mouth in yours? Not so many… Anyway, it actually felt good, way better than anything I had ever felt. Then the mouth pulled away from mine, and helped me up. I would have been so freaked out if some girl was doing it to me, but I could tell it was a guy, because he lifted me off the ground. “Oh thank God she’s awake!” I heard Emily say. Then Michael gave me a bear hug. “Are you Okay?” He said in a sorry voice. “I’m… fine” I said and it was true. “Thank God!” he muttered, and let go of me. And then I turned around, to see the man who saved my life. To my greatest surprise it was Luke. He looked very serious, and he was wearing a lifeguard suit. “What are you doing here?” I croaked. “Oh, I have a part time job as the lifeguard here,” he said, “and I saved your life.” I could have burst out crying, but I didn’t. “I don’t know how to thank you enough!” I said very thankfully. He smiled, “Don’t mention it.” He said and walked away. “Let’s get you home” Emily suggested. “Home sounds great” I said. And we all walked back to the park, where Michael had brought his car (Thankfully not his bike) and he drove us all to my place. “Why don’t you all come in for a while?” I asked. “Okay” Emily said and the other two nodded. I led them all inside and told them that I would be right back as I needed to change. I went upstairs, and took a quick, hot shower and pulled on some clothes, made myself presentable and walked down the stairs. Dan and Michael were talking to Justin, while Emily sat aside, and listened. I sat down beside her, she smiled. “Tea? Coffee? Anything else?” I offered. “I’m fine.” Michael said. “We’re good” Dan said and Emily nodded. “Okay, so what are we talking about?” “Basketball” Dan answered, simply. “Yeah, and Swimming!” Justin said. “Whatever…” I muttered, and then Michael stood up and sat next to me, while Justin and Dan kept going on and on about how many laps they can swim in five minutes, or how far they can shoot a basket from. “I’ll be right back.” Emily said, heading towards the bathroom. “Hey,” Michael said in a soft voice, “I’m sorry about earlier…” “It’s okay, I shouldn’t have gone in anyway, there was such a strong wind.” I said. “I mean, I could have saved you myself, but that dude wouldn’t let me.” He said. I couldn’t help smiling, “That’s okay Michael.” “Thanks Shann,” he said and kissed my cheek. “No problem” I said. There was nothing much to talk about. “You were right,” I said. He smiled, “I am always, but about what this time?” he wanted to know. “Well, you don’t make such a bad boyfriend at all” I admitted. His face brightened, and I knew he was about to kiss me right then, but obviously he remembered that there were people here and at my house, so… yeah. random Later on, Dan and Emily went away, to I don’t know where. “I have to go now as well” Justin said. “Where to?” Michael asked. “Oh, I’m going out tonight with Angela” “Angela?” he said. “His girlfriend,” I told him. Michael looked surprised. “You have a girlfriend already? How old are you?” I held my laughter. “Fourteen” He said. “Yeah we’ve been together since last year.” “Aren’t you a little too young?” “Uh, no, now if you excuse me, I have a girl to take out now, and I don’t wanna be late” Justin said and went upstairs, to spray on some deodorant I bet. “I have given him the speech already once.” I told him. “Ah, Okay, but you have to admit, he’s just fourteen! Don’t your parents say anything?” “No, not really,” I told him. “Oh…” he said, and turned to face me. “Yeah…” I sighed; looking at him, there wasn’t much I could see. Later on, I showed him my favourite room, the study, he looked through everything and nodded, “Cool,” was all he said, and we sat down on the sofa, “I owe you this,” He said then, and moved his lips onto mine, kissing me deeper than before. I have to admit, it didn’t feel half as good when Luke had kissed me. But he didn’t really kiss me, he had just done mouth to mouth, but why didn’t he let Michael do it? I’m sure that they teach you that at the beginning of swimming lessons, just in case… Anyway, by then he had pulled me closer to his body, and I had moved my hand to the side of his head. And then, after a little while, I became uncomfortable, because then I remembered something. Luke lived right next door to me, and his room window was right there, so that if he looked through, he would see a making out couple. But hopefully he might be doing something else, out of his room. I quickly pulled away and looked out of the window, and he was there, standing behind the window, staring at us. I blushed when his eyes met mine. He just stood there with a rather hurt look on his face. Before I could do anything else, Michael had turned his head to where I was looking, and he too, blushed. “Aw, damn!” Michael muttered. Luke, seeing that he had interrupted, pulled his curtains over. Michael did as well, just in case. “That was, uh, awkward…” I said. “My kiss or that dude watching us from his window?” he wanted to know. I smiled a little, “Luke” I corrected, “watching us.” He grinned, “Yeah, but the kissing was excellent.” “Yeah…” I sighed, “It was” I said now thinking about Luke, even though my boyfriend was right here. “What are you thinking about, um, Shannon?” he asked, his face just inches away from mine. “Oh, nothing…” I said, and pecked lightly at his lips, and then stood up. “Now what shall we do?” I asked. He was grinning very widely, staring right into me. “How about uh…” I kept thinking about something, because I knew where this was going, “you can stay for dinner; it should be ready in like a minute.” I suggested. “Not exactly what I had in mind, but okay.” He said. I shook my head, then took his hand and led him downstairs, where my dad and mom were sitting. “Michael is joining us for dinner” I announced. “Okay” My mom said from the kitchen. My dad looked up at him from his chair and nodded, “How do you do son?” he asked, not even half interested. “I’m fine, thanks, and you?” he replied politely. “Good, good.” He said, and returned to the book he was reading. Michael looked at me and I shrugged. Then after a few minutes my mom announced that dinner was ready and we all went to the table, and sat down. Mom smiled at Michael, ‘Well, hello there” she said. “Hey,” Michael said. “How’s it going?” “Fine, everything’s fine” “Oh, um okay” mom said. Then there was a long pause, and then my mom spoke again. “How old are you?” she asked him. “I’m 18” he said. Yeah, so he’s 2 years older than me! So is Luke! “Oh!” she said in surprise “You’re two whole years older that Shannon here.” She told him as if he didn’t already know. “Yes, she’s sixteen I’m eighteen, two years older, I am,” He said. “Paul’s first girlfriend was three years younger though, Susan.” My dad said. “Yes, I know John, He was 17 and she was 14, what was her name again?” “Um, Julia I think it was, sweet girl, but she was just Shannon’s age.” He said. “Yeah, she used to be my friend, but she moved to Florida.” I said. Michael looked bored, “Well, anyway…” “Hmm…” Michael said, nodding. “Oh, yes, speaking of Paul, he called earlier” Dad said. “Yeah, what did he say then?” Mom wanted to know. “He’s coming next Friday.” He told. “No way! My baby is coming in less than a week after a whole year!” she said excited, the just like I was, I liked my brother Paul. After that my mom was dying to call everyone she knew about it. In a while, everyone was done with their food and I started clearing up the plates, and Michael followed. “You’re brother is coming from?” he asked. “Oh, from the UK, he goes to the Oxford University.” I told him “Wow, that’s pretty cool.” He said. “Yeah, Paul is a good guy.” I said. He started helping me do the dishes, kind of. I splashed some water on him, laughing. He splashed some back on me, and we kept going on and on, until all the dishes were done. We were kind of soaking, but it was okay. “Wanna come over to my place?” He asked. “Oh sure, but let me just change.” I said. “Alright,” he said, and followed me upstairs. My room was very messy at the moment, all my clothes were lying around and including my underwear’s, I hope he didn’t notice. I picked out a shirt and turned to him. He was looking around my room. “Sorry it’s a bit messed up, um, I got to change now, so if you don’t mind…” I said. “Oh, no of course not,” he said and turned around, “I’m not looking, now hurry up.” I laughed, but quickly changed while his back was faced to me. I’m sure he wasn’t peeking. “Okay, all ready.” I said, and then he turned around. “Oh, let’s go now.” He said, taking my hand and we left out to his car and he drove me to his house. “Wow,” I said looking around, “Very beautiful.” "You mean the house?" He paused, "Or me?" I blushed, "The house." "Oh, well.. My moms an artist." he chuckled. “Where are your parents?” I asked. “Oh, they’re not at home.” He said. “Ooh alright then” I said and he led me to his room, which was even messier than mine. “Ah, I haven’t cleaned this place in days!” he exclaimed. “Days? More like years!” I joked. He laughed, “Yeah I know.” Then without warning me, he took off his shirt and revealed his body. I didn’t have anything to say. He grabbed a clean, dry shirt and put it on. “How do I look now?” he asked. “No comment!” I said, smiling. He chuckled, “Fine, but you look great anyway.” “Yeah I know.” I teased. He shook his head and put his arm around me. “So, what do you wanna do now?” he asked. “I don’t know,” I said. “Oh, well…” he said. “Yeah?” I asked. “I don’t know…” He replied. “Oh,” I said. “Let’s watch a movie,” he suggested. “Sure,” I said, and we went to the TV room and played a movie. I don’t really like to watch movies, I prefer to read the books, but there was nothing else to do so. I’m sure he got bored of it too, because half way through, I saw him looking at me instead of the screen. I was about to tell him how boring it was but I never got the chance to. He was kissing me again I was even starting to get annoyed. Not a lot of people say that, but it didn’t feel the way I always thought it might, I saw no fireworks, but I’m not saying that I didn’t enjoy it, it’s just… yeah, you know what I mean. So we sat there, glued to each other for like, ten minutes, and then I started to get really bored and tired. “I wanna go home now” I said breaking the kiss. “Um, okay” he said, and he drove me home. I got out of the car and waited for him to leave. I didn’t go inside, I stayed out, and then I saw that Luke was doing the same thing.   emojis  Luke was standing, not noticing me. I walked up to him, “Hi.” I said. He looked at me. “Oh Hey Shannon” he said. “Um, I’m sorry about the whole window thing, I forgot, um, yeah.” I tried to explain. “Oh that’s okay,” he smiled weakly “So, you enjoy it much don’t you?” I was shocked by his question but whatever, “Well, not with him really, I don’t know…” I said. “Oh you don’t? You looked like you were having fun then” he shrugged. “I really don’t know, I’m not even sure if he’s The One for me. I’m just… confused,” I sighed. “Oh yeah I get the feeling…” He said. Then I tried to change the subject, “Hey, Luke, Thank you so much for saving my life earlier, I am so grateful to you, I don’t know what else I can do!” I said. “Any time,” he smiled, and then he hugged me, and I hugged him back. The sensation came back. I felt complete, as if there was a part of me missing for my whole life, until the times he touches me, then everything changes. Then we pulled apart, “Well see you later,” I said. “Yeah, goodnight” he said and we went home. I entered my house and sat in the Study, thinking heavily. I don’t know what was wrong with me, I felt odd, and I don’t think I should have ever agreed in going out with Michael, it just seems awkward. Well, on the bright side, Paul was coming! He’s my favourite brother. Well, its not like I don’t care about Justin… but I always preferred Paul. So then after a while I went to bed. I woke up very late, because I was very sleepy. I got ready and stuff and went downstairs, had breakfast. I had no idea of what I was going to do that day. I went back to my room and turned on the computer, to find out that the internet was not working! That was just sad. So I called Emily. “Hi Em,” I said when she picked up. “Oh hey Shann what’s up?” she said. “Absolutely nothing!” “Oh, don’t have plans for today?” “No, but Paul is coming on Friday!” “Oh Paul, cool!” “Yeah, so what are you doing?” “Oh, me, I’m just hanging around with Canine” Canine is her dog. “Oh, okay, can I come over then?” “Please do, Shannon, I’m feeling lonely!” She said and then we hung up. I walked over to her house and saw her playing fetch with the massive German Shepard. “Hey!” I called. “Hi! Shannon!” She yelled, throwing the Frisbee away from the dog. I walked over to her. “What’s up” I said. “Nothing, help me wash Canine will you?” she asked. “Sure!” The dog came and we brought in the hose and washed up the dog, and we got washed as well, all soaked. “I’m frikkin soaked up!” She yelled in between laughing. “Well, your not the only one that is, around here!” I said. I was wearing a white top, which was now fully see through, she was wearing blue. She looked at me, “Um, I think you’ll need to borrow a shirt from me for now.” “Oh, yeah I guess,” I said looking down at myself. At least nobody else was in the house, because her parents are always at a meeting on weekends and she’s an only child. So we got to her room, and we dried off a little, she took out two shirts, one for me and one for her, and she let me use her room, while she used the bathroom. So, first I started to dry off my hair, and that took some time, even though it is a little short, but if I didn’t then the shirt would get wet all over again, and then it took ages to untangle! I could already hear Emily’s footsteps now, which mean she had already changed. And then I turned the hair dryer back on and it has a loud noise. Finally my hair was done, and my shirt was still wet, as I hadn’t changed yet, and then I heard a knock on the door. “Come in,” I said, expecting it to be Emily. The door opened slowly, and Michael stood there in the doorway. My face turned red, and I could feel my temperature rising with embarrassment and anger. I quickly pulled a towel over myself. “What are you doing here?!” I asked, in a number of different expressions. “Sorry, I just thought you might be here. You weren’t home and your phone was off, Emily said you were in here, but I didn’t know you were wet…” he said. Why can’t you leave me alone? What is so important? That’s what I wanted to say, but the words didn’t seem to find their way out. I was standing in a room, with a towel over myself, and a guy is in there, a guy who might be my boyfriend! How embarrassing! “Just… give me a minute,” I said in a calmer tone, but still annoyed. Then with a nod, he walked out and closed the door behind him. I quickly pulled the shirt on and calmed myself down a little. Then I walked out the room, and put my top to dry. I knew Michael was following me, but I decided to ignore him for a while. I stomped down the stairs, and walked to where Emily was sitting. “So I see you’ve invited someone in,” I said to her quietly and annoyed, enough so that he couldn’t hear. “Yeah anytime,” she said back, as if she did me a favour. I rolled my eyes, and shook my head. Then Michael came along, and I had to pull on my happy and calm face. “Hey, so what did you need me for?” I asked. “Oh, nothing I was just bored, so I though I would drop by, but you weren’t home, and I tried to call but your phone was off, so I came here to ask Emily here, if she knew where you were, and I don’t have her phone number till now.” He explained. That just annoyed me to much, but I’m a good actor. “Well, so here I am, now what?” I asked. This totally got him. He rubbed the back of his head, “Um, I really don’t know” I bet he was thinking this: Way to ruin the moment, Shannon, you asked something that I can’t answer. But anyway… I was so annoyed, angry, and embarrassed. ((i know its gettin' boring but dont tell me i didnt warn ya!)) tissue plz After a while, all three of us just sat there, watching MTV. Emily and I sang with the music when our favourite songs started, and when some weird song came, we could always hear Michael singing along with them. Did I mention he had a terrible voice, take away bad taste in music? Well he does, and we both tried to hide our laughs when he sang. But I guess he caught us giggling once when he started to rap, because he stopped singing after that. And then Dan arrived. Emily got up from beside me, and um, greeted him. While Michael and I we sitting in different places, but both uncomfortable. Then they finally stopped greeting, and joined us; Em beside me, and Dan with his best friend Michael. I stayed smiling. I turned off the television, as now no one was watching, but they were talking. This is our conversation: Dan: Hey guys! Me+ Michael: Hey Dan Emily: So, we meet again… Me: Yeah so sad Michael: I think its pretty cool that this happens. Dan: Yo she was just kidding, this is cool, all of this. Me: Yeah… Emily: All of what? Michael: Meeting each other randomly? Dan: Yeah, and that (now looking at me and Emily) they are best friends, and so are we (him and Michael), and um, we’re all going out with each other… did I get that wrong?! (Everybody laughs at Dan’s confusion) Emily: Yeah I think you got that wrong! Well, we get the point anyway! (Dan blushes a little) Michael: Dude, I’m not going out with all of you! (Says in a joke way) (Nobody laughs) Michael: Um, yeah never mind. Me: Uh huh, okay. Then we just chatted about random things like who wore what to school, but that was just us girls who talked about that, the guys were talking about their other guy friends and what’s going on with them. So it’s true, boys like to gossip a little as well. So then, I guess Michael got bored… “Hey, let’s go out for a while now, what do you say?” He said to me. “Um,” I looked at Emily, her eyes we gleaming and she smiled, “Okay.” I actually don’t like to spend so much time with him alone, now I have to admit that he’s a pretty boring person, yeah so sue me again! Ah! We walked out of the door, hand in hand, and he started walking. We didn’t have much to say at all because: He took out his iPod and put his left earphone on, handing the other one to me. I politely took it and put it in my right ear, after checking that it was clean. Then he put on some music, some hip hop, but gladly he didn’t sing along. I would have sang along, but I didn’t know or like any of the songs he had, and the number of songs he had were over 500, while I didn’t even make it to a single hundred yet. We stopped walking and stopped at this juice bar, and took a seat outside. “What would you like to drink?” He asked. “Surprise me,” I answered, trying to sound happy. “Okay,” And then he turned to the waiter, “two fruit cocktails please.” The waiter nodded and walked away. I rested my elbows on the table, and my chin in my hands. He started talking about what happened in basketball practise one day, and all these lame jokes which I have to laugh at, and that sort of stuff. I could swear that I drifted off somewhere in between the part where he was telling me how he passed history, until he asked me something. “So are you ready then?” He had asked. I obviously wasn’t even listening, because I just remembered a joke I had told one of my teachers last year, and started laughing. “Um, Shannon? Why are you laughing?” he wanted to know, and then I shook out of it. “Oh, sorry it’s nothing, just remembered something that happened last year,” I so didn’t mean to say that! “So, uh, what did you want to know?” I changed the subject. “I wanted to know if you were ready for the match tomorrow, you know, you’re the head cheerleader.” The match! I forgot about that. “Oh, oh! The match, of course I’m ready, yeah” I said, trying my best to show that I wasn’t lying, and then finished off the cocktail, which was delicious! He smiled at me, shaking his head, then he finished off his drink and we headed out. “So where do you wanna go now?” he asked. “I don’t know, anywhere I guess.” I shrugged. “Hmm okay, you wanna go to…” he thought for a moment, “Lets just go back to my place.” “Sounds good.” I said to be polite, and we walked off again, with the iPod, and this time I was glad, because I didn’t wanna hear his boring stories anyway. We got to his house and I followed him in. He pulled me by the hand and led me to a room, which was his bedroom. It was still messy though, he hadn’t though about cleaning it up. He shut the door when we were inside; I took a seat that I found on his bed. “Okay, lets get your room cleaned up for a start.” I suggested. “Yes, mother.” He grinned. I nodded and then looked around the room “So, where do I start from?” I wondered out loud, “How about you start cleaning up your closet and put the dirty clothes aside?” I asked him, because no way I was going near that thing. “Fine, fine.” He said and went off to work. I practically did the rest of the room, because he was taking a long time. “Now you have to clean your room at least twice a week! Okay?” I said. “I’ll try then, for you.” He said and grinned at me again. “Kay, so now put the dirty pile in the laundry basket, you have over there, and” I pointed to it, “where you had put in the math book you said you were missing.” He did what he was told then held out his hands, “Okay, mission accomplished, now give me a hug.” I looked at his hands, which he touched the clothes that weren’t washed for maybe a month with, “Um, not yet, go take a shower.” I said, I didn’t want to get some horrible disease. He raised an eyebrow, but nodded, “Okay then, just wait here, I’ll be back in a few.” With that he took a towel and headed to the bathroom. While he was in, I just wandered around his room, looking at stuff. I found a hidden cupboard and opened it. I stuck my head inside it and looked around, it was really dirty there, and ancient, as if it hadn’t been opened for a few years. Well, don’t keep your hopes up, there wasn’t anything much in it, I found some old things like a lost keychain, and a few playing cards and some old torn book that pages were torn and stained. Nothing special really but I think it carried something that I didn’t want. The stupid flu. I got out and closed the cupboard, then I sneezed, three times in a row which isn’t that normal for me. On my third sneeze, Michael came out of the shower with nothing but a towel around his waist, “Whoa, are you alright babe?” Babe? Babe? Since when did he start calling me that? Oh right… now. “Umm… yeah I’m alright… Michael.” I said, using his real name. “Good now give me my hug” he demanded, raising his arms. “I think that I might be sick now, I just looked in that cupboard of yours…” He laughed, “I like your germs.” I shrugged but went up to him and gave him his hug. He was warm, but wet and smelled like shower gel. I don’t know why he couldn’t wait till he changed, but whatever. Anyway, I pulled away and stepped back. “Hey I wasn’t done!” he whined. “Yeah, and I’ve already gotten wet once today, and I think that enough.” I said quickly. “Fine,” he said and took out some clean clothes to wear. He took out some and put them on, not bothering to hush me out of the room. I guess he didn’t really care, so before I saw anything, I turned around, “Yeah, you could have warned me you know?” I said. “About what?” he asked completely clueless, “Oh, oh sorry.” He said in the least apologetic voice. I waited for a bit for him to change, and then when I heard no more noise, I looked back, and he was already right behind me. That made me jump, and lose balance; thankfully he caught me before I could fall. “Easy now, baby,” he said softly, but I was still annoyed that he was not calling me by my proper name. He pulled me back up, and this time he was wearing clean clothes, so he was safe, and he came closer to me. I wanted to get away, but by then he was holding me close to him, and tightly, so I couldn’t move. Then he lowered his lips to mine, and started kissing me fiercely. And I let him. Not that I had any other choice, and he wouldn’t let go of me until he got something in return. So I kissed him back, with the same power that he put into it. But he still wouldn’t let go. And I wasn’t letting him get too far… I pulled my face back as much as I could, “Okay, I think that’s enough.” I said. He actually looked kind of sad. Then came the guilt. “I’m sorry,” I said and put my arms around him and kissed him again, but then after a few seconds, we both pulled away and… Sneezed. SICK !?!?!??! His eyes widened, “Oh, no, no, no, no!” I smiled, “How do you like my germs now?” He took a deep breath, “They’re okay.” He shrugged. “Yeah and we have a match to participate in tomorrow!” I said. “Crap! Okay, okay, we’ll both get plenty of rest and take good medicine, and just try not to get sick, this is gonna be a great match…” he said all panicky. “Yeah, alright. I better get going then” I said. “Yes. No, wait I’ll drop you off,” he said and I smiled, “or else you might just get a cold.” Then the smile vanished, “And, it would make me a bad boyfriend if I didn’t.” he said at last. “Fine, let’s go now.” I said and started heading towards the door. It was just a sneeze! I thought. We got into the car and he drove me safely home. “Bye, see you tomorrow.” I said, taking off the seatbelt. “Okay, I was overreacting, I don’t know how anyone can get sick because of a dirty cupboard, it’s just that this match means a lot to me. And it was just a sneeze.” He said. “I understand that,” I said trying to be polite. “I knew you would, babe.” He said, and then he was kissing me yet again. I was too tired to kiss back, and then I guess so was he because he let go of me. “Bye,” he said and I went out and into my house. I opened the door to see Justin had brought home his little Angela, and I smiled at them as I had nothing else to do. “Hi, you must be Angela” I said. “Yes, and you must be Shannon,” she said, “right?” “Right, I’ve heard so much about you! Justin talks about you all the time.” That was the best lie ever. I don’t like to do two things: Lie and make people feel bad. But if it is Justin it changes everything! He glared at me to show that he was angry. I smiled at him. “You do? That’s… nice.” She said. “Oh, um yeah,” he said, rubbing the back of his head. Then the funniest thing (funny to me…) happened. Okay so, she was all happy that her boyfriend speaks about her at home, and she moved her face to his, so they were making out and Justin’s face turned all red, I smiled at him and patted Angela’s head and walked away. Oh my god, you should have seen him! Anyway, I went to my room and lay on my bed, thinking of Luke. I fell asleep very quickly. The sound of the doorbell woke me up. I felt really tired and my head felt heavy. I went downstairs and opened the door. I smiled and look at who it was. “Oh hi Luke,” I said trying to look my best. “Hey are you… feeling okay?” he asked with a hint of concern in his voice. “Yes,” I said quickly, “why do you ask?” “Um, well first, you sound like you’ve had a frog for lunch, and your face is all red.” He said. “Oh sure” I said, rolling my eyes. “Go check for yourself then…” he said. “Okay… come on in.” I said moving back to let him come in. He came in, and I signalled him to wait, and I rushed to the bathroom, and looked in the mirror. He was right, my face was red, and I looked horrible, my eyes were pale like my skin and the tip of my nose was bright pink. I quickly washed my face, and then went back to where he was. Luke was looking at our family pictures on the wall, and was currently smiling at one. I walked to him and blushed. He was looking at a picture of when I was thirteen and I had braces and freckles, and I wore glasses as well. “Hey, no, that was along time back and I told mom to take it off, it’s really embarrassing,” I said. “I think it’s quite nice, not bad actually.” “Oh sure… anyway,” I said walking towards the sofa, as he followed me, “what’s up?” He sat beside me, and looked serious, “Well, remember the other day when you came home from wherever you went with Michael, you said you weren’t sure that he was the one for you… that made me think, um, what did you exactly mean by that?” I didn’t know what to say then… “Um, I don’t know…” “Come on Shann, you can tell me, its okay.” He said sweetly. “Well, I don’t feel that… that we’re right for each other, I don’t know. I don’t feel that way about him.” I admitted. “Oh.” Then there was a pause. “I have a few questions for you as well.” I said. “Go on then.” “First of all, why are you asking me this?” “Uh, no reason, the question was haunting my brain that’s all.” “Okay, and… when I told you that the other day, you had said that you also had the feeling before, didn’t you?” I asked. “No, I didn’t.” “Yes you did Luke, go on tell me.” “Um, I said I get the feeling sometimes, like my… ex’s” he said. “You have exgirfriends?” “Yeah, just one, when I was 12… it lasted for a week, that’s why I was surprised about that thing with your brother and all.” “Oh, alright. And… why did you save my life that day at the beach?” “Oh, because that’s well, my job, and you’re my friend so…” he said. “Yeah, I get that, but…” Why did you do it and didn’t let Michael? I’m sure he could… That’s what I wanted to say, but I thought it would sound a bit rude, “never mind, I’m still very grateful for that.” He smiled, “Okay, is that all the questions you wanted to ask?” I thought for a moment, “No, um one more.” I said, and I really wanted to ask this one. “Luke, do you really like Kelly?” I asked very nervously. He was silent for a moment, “I’m sorry you don’t need to answer…” “No its fine, I… don’t know if I do, I don’t think I like her in that way.” I wasn’t expecting that answer, but I guess it was obvious. “Then why did you ask her out?” I asked. “Oh I ask anyone out, really, usually I get a no-no or it lasts only for the day, I would have even asked you out” he admitted. I looked really surprised. “Really?” “Oh sure, but Michael told me that he would so I stepped back, yeah.” He shrugged. Oh Michael! Why did you tell him!? Why?! “Ah, I see, and then that day when you gave me a ride to school, you asked for advice to ask someone out, so how did Kelly take it then? I just wanna know, that’s all.” I said. “Oh, I didn’t even do that for her, I just went out and asked her, not like I didn’t want your advice, its just that she isn’t the one I was gonna use it for.” He smiled. I was so shocked; I didn’t know what to say. “Okay, uh, that’s all for now.” I said. “Alright… so you don’t love Michael do you?” he asked. “No, of course I don’t!” I said too quickly. He chuckled, and I blushed. “Yeah, okay then.” “Yeah, a few years ago he let out his secret love for me, and I explained to him that I didn’t wanna be more than friends, and we were okay with it then. And then… one day I just bump into him, and drop my books, he invites me for just a night out, and then later on he wants me to be his girlfriend, and I… I was really tired, and wanted to go home, and I just said that I would give it a try…” I paused, and started to think why I was telling him all this. “It’s okay, I understand,” he said soothingly, patting my back. “Thanks, Luke,” I said, and I reached up to kiss his cheek, because that’s just normal when friends do it to each other, we always do. But as I was going he turned his head around and I ended up kissing his lips. Big mistake! Oh yeah, but as wrong as it is, it felt so right. When I noticed that it wasn’t his cheek, which took like two seconds, I quickly moved away, “Ohmigod! Sorry, it wasn’t meant to be there!” I said so embarrassed. Unlike me, he was calm, and smiling, “It’s okay, just forget about it, I moved my head.” “Okay,” I said but I was still embarrassed. And then I sneezed once. Then twice. Then another few times. Bad sign, very bad sign… “Are you sure you’re okay?” he asked. “Um… no I’m not.” I said. “You’re not okay?” “That’s what I said, you see I was just at Michael’s place for a while. Oh, man, his room is like hell on earth! I did not know what was living in there. I don’t think I’m okay, neither is Michael, I just need the game tomorrow to be just fine.” I said it all quickly, hoping he understood. He stared at me for a moment and then nodded, “Okay, well then. Get well soon, I better get going.” “Right. Ummmm okay then, I’ll seeya around I hope.” I said kind of disappointed. “Yup! Will do. Bye.” He said and headed out. I sighed and walk up to my bed and slowly drift to sleep. break a leg? wake up just in time to be late. I groan and feel worse than ever. I pull myself out of bed and then I get a phone call. Michael…. “Hey Michael.” I say. “Shannon.” He sounds sick as well. “The game. Are you here yet?” He asks. “Um IM ON MY WAY!” I say and hang up. I get my way to the bathroom and freshen up, then change into my cheerleading uniform, tie up my hair and cover my sick face with makeup. I get downstairs and start heading outside. I meet Luke. “Mornin’ kid!” He greets with a huge grin. I roll my eyes, “Luke.” “You ready for some cheerleading?” He asked with the same smile. “Yeah pretty much.” “Need a ride?” He asked walking towards his car. I hesitate for a moment. “Well… yeah I do actually.” He smiled, “Come on Shannon. Hop in.” “You’re going too?” He asked. “Well yeah… I like basketball. Watching it.” “Oh okay. Great. THANKS!” I smiled and I ride shotgun in the front seat. In the car we didn’t talk much, but there were no awkward silences either. Luke: So, I see you’ve been using a lot of your makeup. Me: *Blush* Well, yeah… I needed something to hide my hideous face. Luke: *Chuckle* Your face is fine. How are you anyway? Me: *Coughs Hysterically.* Luke: Woah okay I get it! Me: Yep. *Smile* Yeah, that’s mostly it. Then we got there, thankfully just in time. I waved at Emily, clumsily, who was sitting next to Dan. His arm was draped around her waist and he was talking to a guy beside him. Anyway, she waved back, smiling widely and again, I could tell that she knew I looked very bad. I glanced back and saw that Luke had joined Will, who was there to support Josh. Then I saw Kelly walk up behind Luke. He looked back and smiled at her, and they started talking. I rolled my eyes and then I met up with the squad. “Shannon! You’re late… and you look awful!” One of them (Hannah) said. “Gee, thanks Hannah.” I say. “Don’t tell me you’re sick!” She looks at me. “I won’t,” I force a smile at her and turn around, but someone grabs me from behind. I look back and it’s Michael. “Shannon.” He looks at me, letting go. “Oh my God.” I cover my mouth with both hands. “Yeah..” he frowns. His face is all pale and his eyes have dark circles underneath them. His hair is messier than it always is and the tip of his nose is red. “I have a cold.” He points out the obvious. “Me too.” I say just like he does. “But we’ll live… maybe.” “I guess we might. Good luck.” He said backing away. “Yep! Break a leg!” Only he didn’t, I did. Okay, this is what happened. I’ll start from the beginning. Well the game started and we had to go on. I and the rest of the squad started our first act of cheerleading. Nothing too complicated. Anyway it went quite well. Although I have to admit I was feeling quite sick. After that the game was starting, I wiped my nose and we all had to cheer. The score was good till now. Our team was winning. I was just watching Michael play a bit. Michael is a really good player. But today, we could all tell the difference in his skills. “What’s wrong with your boyfriend, Shannon?” Another cheerleader asked me. I sighed, “Well he’s obviously sick…” “Just like you.” She said. “I mean… what were you two doing!?” She wanted to know. I looked at her, “I went to his room.” Then I walked away, leaving her in suspense like I do to everyone. Emily came down to me, leaving Daniel there alone with the guy he was talking to. “Shannon!” she whispered. “Emily!” I whispered back. “Wait why are we whispering?!” “Ah” she groans without whispering, “Anyway, you look different today. What’s with all the makeup!?” “I have a cold.” I tell her, shrugging. “I really don’t wanna be here.” “Oh god! And what about Michael!? You got him sick too!?” she asked. I gasped, “HE asked for it! It’s not my fault. I didn’t know what was living in his room…” “You went to his room!” she exclaimed. I couldn’t tell if she was asking me so I stayed silent. “Did you?” I sneezed, “Didn’t I just say I did?” “Oh… What did you do?” she asked curiously I would have told her but I wasn’t in the mood to speak. “It’s not important. Gotta run!” I said and walked away, now leaving yet another in suspense. I’m sure she thought of it in a wrong way. Then we came to the interval. We needed to do a pyramid. And guess who had to be at the top? You don’t even need to guess. The question implies it. Well of course, me. I climbed up to the top of it while singing and that’s when it happened. It was like, one minute we’re singing while the guys are eyeballing us, and the next, people are calling ambulance. You can’t say it was my fault. Because it wasn’t. In fact this is all Michaels fault. All of it! So when I got to the top of the pyramid, I felt wobbly and lazy. All these weird sick feelings. They all came to me at once. And… I just fell. The really surprising thing was that I was the only one that did. Everyone else was in place, watching me. There was a sudden gasp from the audience. I could sense a large circle forming around me, people yelling for someone to call the ambulance. I was lying there unconscious and I just knew that I had a broken leg. Before I even got an x ray. The ambulance crew arrived with a stretcher and someone gently pulled me onto one, taking me in. When I woke up I was in a hospital room, on a hospital bed. “She’s awake!” some one called. Dad… “Honey! Are you feeling any better?” My mom rushed over and crouched next to the bed, holding my hand. I nodded, and looked around the room. It was packed with quite a few people. There was Dad, mom, Justin, Angela, Emily, Daniel, Josh, Will and…. Luke! “Yeah I think I’m good.” I looked at my right leg, “Oh my god.” I sighed. There was a cast from my toes to right under my knee. “Shannon, sweety, you broke your leg.” My mom said. I still don’t get why people think I’m still five and they tell me things that I kind of already figured out. “Really mom.” I asked her. “Shannon! Oh my God. That was so horrible! I was so worried! Are you okay!?” Emily panicked coming to the other side of the bed. I took a tissue and blew my nose, and then I nodded. “Just fine.” I said. “But what’s with all the people here?!” I whispered the last part. No one was paying that much attention to me anyway. “Oh that, I really don’t know.” She shrugged. “Well then.” I surveyed around, trying to see if Michael was anywhere in sight. Nope. Not at all. I guess I cant really blame him. He was sick too. “How did the rest of the game go?” I asked, and now Dan was standing beside Emily. “We lost.” He informed, “Michael needed to sneeze on the winning shot and he did.” Dan chuckled, “Sad but hilarious.” I smiled, “Oh well…” “Why are you smiling Shan…?” Emily asked, suspicious. I shake my head, “Oh nothing. It’s nothing.” I grin and leave her in suspense. Yet once more. She shook her head as well and sighed, “Okay. Whatever. I wanna be the first to sign your cast.” “Knock yourself down.” I shrugged. She stared at me, “It’s knock yourself out… But anyway.” And that’s the story of my poor little leg. The exciting stuff comes further into it. *KNOCK* A bit later that Sunday, Luke came up to me with a white rose, in the hospital room. “Hey, Shanny, how are you feeling?” He asked, handing me the Rose with a smug grin on his face. I arched my eyebrows, taking the flower. “Well… I’m better than before. Now I have a cold AND a broken leg.” I sighed. He chuckled, “Its gonna be okay” he said, Sitting down on the bed beside me. Okay so now, mostly everyone had left. Emily and Dan left a while ago and everyone else left right after signing my cast. Mom and dad went to go get my crouches. So it was just me and Luke. Alone in a hospital room. Ooooh. “Mhmm, so how is Kelly?” I asked. “Kelly? Oh Kelly…” He chuckled, “She’s Kellyish I guess.” He smiled shrugging. I rolled my eyes but cracked a smile. “So do I get a go in signing your leg?” He asked. I nodded, “Just use a little space. Everyone will want to sign it. My little cousins I mean.” I said handing him a marker set. “Here you go.” He nodded and took the pack, taking out a few colours. After a moment of scribbling on my cast he sighed pleasurably, at his master work. “Ah it just makes your cast look so better.” I got up and tried to see it. “Where did you write it?” “Oh it’s at the back” he said chuckling. “What does it say!?” I asked curiously, looking him in the eyes. Beautiful eyes. He looked at me for a moment. “Just the usual.” He said with a sheepish smile, that made me suspicious. Hey! “Hey! You’re stealing my thunder!” I complained, “You’re leaving me in suspense?!” He nodded, smiling, “Yup!” I rolled my eyes, “That’s my job!” He laughed, “Okay! Sorry!” “It’s okay. Anyway…” I thought of something to say. “Did Michael come?” He asked looking at me. “Umm no,” I shrugged. “What a boyfriend.” He said chuckling. “Nah, he’s sick as well. I heard that they lost the game because of him.” I told him. “Yeah, he must be killing himself over it, although everyone said it was okay.” Luke sighed patting my knee. He just has to make me smile doesn’t he? “Why would he be doing that?” I asked. “He is a guy…” He shrugged. Then mom and dad rushed through the door, “-can you say that, it might just be- Oh hello!” My mom smiled at us, stopping her conversation with dad. Luke turned his head, and smiled, getting up, “Hey, how are you guys?” Dad smiled, “Hey. You’re the new people on the block right?” Luke nodded, “Right.” “We’re good. Thanks.” Mom smiled. “Great.” He smiled and got up, rubbing his hands together. Dad walked closer to me and handed me the two long sticks, “Can you get up a little?” I nodded, “Sure,” I said and sat up on the bed, my heavy leg wobbling, “Whoa...” “Here put your arms into here and hold on to the handles.” He directed. I did what I was told, and got up on one leg. “Ah that’s it.” Mom smiled at me and they started walking out, “We’ll be right back we need to pay for them. Some one forgot their wallet…” Dad gave mom a look and shrugged at me, picking up his wallet from the table. Luke laughed as they disappeared, out of sight. “I like your parents, their funny. Unlike mine…” He smiled. “Well, yeah. I guess. You’re parents must be nice as well.” I told him, smiling back. “Uh huh.” He nodded, “Hey, can you walk with those?” I laughed, “Of course I can!” And I showed him how I could walk with the crutches. But too bad I didn’t know how to handle them. Yes I tripped but Luke… I took a step with them and they suddenly started wobbling against the floor and my good foot slipped and I was falling backwards. “Whoa, easy now.” Luke said smiling at me from his arms, holding me so that I don’t hit the floor. I blushed a scarlet red and got myself up. Luke was grinning, helping me up, “I’m guessing you take it back that you know how to use them. “Um yeah.” I said still blushing. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Later on that day I got home, I sat on my bed and continued reading some books I had to read for school, with a box of tissues by my side and the white rose that Luke had given me in a thin and long, clear crystal vase. I put the book down for a moment and stood up, holding onto my crutches. I walked a few steps to my full mirror which was stuck on one of my walls, surrounded by many pictures and posters. I looked in it and saw a girl. A not-too-tall-or-short-or-thin-or-fat girl. With dark, shocking copper curls dangling from her head. A pale face with bright pink lips, a fairly long nose, which was red at the tip and deep blue eyes which turned a rather green colour occasionally. It was obviously me, because what else do you see when you look in a mirror while standing right in front of it? But this girl, for some reason, I thought looked miserable. I stared at myself for a moment and walked back to my bed, to continue reading my book. I was just reading when there were a few knocks on my door. I straightened up in my bad and left the open book, face down, drop on my lap. I turned my head to the door and called, “Come in.” The door slowly opened and my dads head popped out from the slightly open door. “Hon, there’s someone here to see you.” He said. “Who?” I asked trying to look behind him. He backed away, and let someone enter my room. It was a tall blonde girl with cheery, hazel eyes and a bright and soft smile. I smiled up at her, welcoming, “Hey, Kelly. Come, sit.” I say to her. Kelly comes and sits beside me on my bed, “Hi Shannon! I just came by to see how you were doing! I heard you broke your leg…” She said glancing over to my leg which was now covered in a white plaster and signed by many. “Yes, I did.” I said giving her a weary smile. She fished out something from her handbag and out came a pen. “Can I…?” “Oh sure! Knock yourself out.” I smirked at myself for remembering to say ‘out’ and not ‘down’. She looked at it for a moment until she found an empty space. She carefully opened the cap of her felt tip pen, which made a plopping sound. She wrote in some blue scribbles and finished with an, “Ah!” I smiled and looked over at it. She wrote just near my ankle. It said, ‘Get well soon, and get back to cheering! XOXO Kelly!’ She had written it in neat girly letters, with the dot of the letter ‘i’ circled and the letters looped in some way. Yeah, what people would call girly. “Wow, thanks Kell,” I smiled at her, gratefully. She giggled, “Uh huh!” Then… Knock once. Knock twice. Followed by another. “Come in.” I call, as I turn my head towards the door, and so does Kelly. The door opens slowly, and a tall grinning figure appears in the doorway. This figure has muddy brown hair, with a slight fringe running down its forehead. Shiny blue eyes, and if seen closely there will be hints of an emerald green circling the blue. Kind of like my own, but more dazzling. A soft face with a light summer tan, and a beautiful heart-melting smile. This figure closed the door, and turned to us. “Luke!” Kelly grinned at him, walking over and giving him a hug. Luke… Luke Dawson. No, Lucas Dawson. And he’s in my room. With Kelly Tanner and Shannon Mezzanotte (med-za-not-tay meaning midnight in Italian. Cool? I know). He wrapped his arm around Kelly, “Hey what are you doing here?” He asked her. “Oh and Hey Shannon, I just came by to see how you were doing.” “I came for the same thing. But you never come to see how I am doing. Luke?!” “That,” he looked at her smartly, “Is because you are not my neighbour. You live far away from here.” She sighed and nodded in agreement. “Hiya Luke,” I smiled, “I’m alright.” I hear myself mutter, “Just fine.” So we sat there for some time. It felt awkward. Really dang awkward, to be in my room with Luke and Kelly. Who are a couple, and poor Kelly doesn’t know that her precious Lucas doesn’t even love her. So anyway nothing much happened. I could see Luke, himself, felt a little uncomfortable himself. Later on Kelly had to go; she couldn’t be late for lunch on Sundays with her family. So she left. “Seeya Shannon, Luke.” She smiled leaving us. “Bye!” I called before she left. “Yeah, later.” Luke said in his low voice. He was sitting on a chair near my bed and he started our conversation. “Anyway, how’s the books going?” he asked. “Great,” I told him. “And yours?” “Yeah I just started another one...” And it went on. (sorry i know its a boring one!) thunder Sunday ended and still no sign of Michael wanting to get to me. I woke up from the deep voice of my dad trying to wake me up for school. “Shannon, rise and shine bud, its Monday, your favourite day of the week!” He said, grinning at me. I groaned. He knew it was actually my least favourite day of the week. AND I have a broken leg! Can’t he let me stay in for just a day? “Gerrup!” he said, his mouth full of something. He patted on my shoulder, and left the room, leaving the lights on. I slowly got up and looked around for my crutches. I got hold of one and reached for the other, and took myself to the bathroom. Then I did the usual, and got back to my room. ‘Can’t wear jeans. Need to live on skirts.’ I though to myself. No way was my cast going to let me wear jeans! So I pulled out a school appropriate skirt and pulled it on with a little difficulty. Then I pulled on a shirt and I did my hair, and I got my bag. Then I got downstairs with the help of my brother. “Pancakes today, or toast?” I heard my mom ask from the kitchen. I looked over at her, “Cereal.” I sat at the table and poured some cereal and milk into a bowl and began munching my way through it. “Dad?” I looked over at him. He put his coffee mug and newspaper down, “What?” “You do know that you’re going to have to drop us to school today right?” I smirked. “What? You’re driving your- Oh… Right.” He sighed. I nodded, “Yep!” “Lets get going then.” He said getting up. Justin headed out the door, flinging his bag over his shoulder. I got up slowly with my crutches and followed my dad, “Bye mommy.” I said while heading out. I rode shotgun in my dad’s land rover, and he dropped us at school. My dad got out and helped me get out, handing me my crutches. “Seeya dad.” Justin called, already halfway to the building. “Bye, daddy,” I smiled at him and pecked his cheek. “Take care Shanny.” He said and left. I started walking to the building, and someone came up behind me. “Shannon!” he called my name. Oh I forgot to mention that I had quickly recovered from my illness. Yes, it’s a miracle. It was one-day influenza. Nice, right? I turned around and saw a blonde haired, green eyed boy a bit older than me. “Michael.” I smiled. “Oh god, Shannon! I’m so so sorry I didn’t come to see you!” he said hugging me a bit, and kissed my head. “Michael, it’s really okay.” I said shrugging off him “No its not, it’s just that, we lost the game, because of me. So I was really worried. I was so sick and when you fell I couldn’t take my mind off you-" he went on. “Shhh, its okay.” I interrupted. He sighed, “Oh okay then. Just don’t hate me.” “I can’t hate you!” I laughed “Come lets get in, we’ll be late.” He smiled a little, “Alright.” He ruffled my hair and walked with me. Awwww how sweet. Anywho, we got to school and then everyone in sight crowded around me. Well the people who really didn’t know anything. And then came a bunch of: ‘Oh gosh! Shannon what have you done to your leg?’ ‘Shannon! What happened?!’ ‘Can I sign your cast?’ And yeah. Horrible! Then when I got past the crowd to my locker I met up with Emily. “Hiya Em!” I say all cheerily. “Shanny!” She jokes around. I roll my eyes and smile a bit. Later on we limp to class together and sit down in History. Classes went okay, and then lunch time came. Emily and I got to the cafeteria and I sat down with my packed lunch while Emily and Dan went to buy food. I sat down alone with my book. I started reading The DaVinci Code again, and I was just on page 57. “Hey.” I looked up at his beautiful eyes in awe. “Hey Luke,” I said smiling, “What’s up.” He grinned, sitting next to me, his head cocked to the side, “Nothing, same stuff. How’s your leg?” “Great…. I guess.” I chuckled softly. He smiled his eyes sparkling, he looked like— Luke leaned in towards me, my heart was pounding hard. —He was about to kiss me! But he didn’t… Why would he? He has his Kelly, although he doesn’t love her. He’s a player. Even though to me he’s the most decent guy ever. Anyway instead he whispered to me: “Your Michael got into trouble with the teacher, he won’t be here soon. He wanted me to tell you…” My Michael?! “Oh okay thanks.” I nodded towards him, “ A lot.” “Yeah. He doesn’t like to know that he’s being a bad ass boy.” He laughed. I thought that was funny too so I laughed along. What! I couldn’t help it! “So anyway… anything strange going on lately?” “Um no, why?” I was suspicious of his weird questions. He just smiled. “Nothing, don’t worry.” I raised a curious brow, “okay then!” “So what were you reading?” He asked completely ignoring my curious brow, and moved his gaze to the book, which I had my arms over. I blushed, feeling like a number one nerd, “Um, The Da Vinci Code.” “Awesome, its really good isn’t it?” He smiled, taking it away from me to see what part I was at. “Yeah, but I’ve read it, it’s just so good.” I said. He nodded, half impressed, but he was reading the blurb. Luke soon put it down and smiled, satisfied. “Okay, well that’s that. Lets do something.” I looked at him again, suspicious, “Like what?” “Um how about we get outside?” He suggested. “Sure. Good idea.” I smiled and tucked my book into my bag and got up with my crutches. He got up and helped me up on my crutches and smiled, “Come on.” I walked beside him as we left the cafeteria. There were a few whispers which I decided to ignore, and obviously so did Luke. Another girl came up to me and tapped my shoulder gently. “Hey, Shannon! Um, I’m Anna… Can I sign your cast?” She asked, grinning widely. She wore glasses and braces, and had short brown hair. I felt kind of ashamed that I didn’t know most of the people who knew me. I didn’t want to be the popular girl, it just happened! So I just smiled and nodded, “Sure thing. Make it quick though!” She kind of looked flattered, “Really? I mean thanks!” She grinned and fished out a pen from her pocket and bent down. She found a spot right at the back. Where Luke had signed it as well. She signed it and got back up, looking kind of confused. “You’re going out with Michael right?” she wanted to know. “Yep…. Um, why?” I asked. She shook her head too quickly, “No, nothing. Thanks. Seeya.” Luke smirked, and I knew he knew something. “What is there that I don’t know?” I asked looking into his pretty eyes. He shook his head as well, “Nothing! And if there is you’ll obviously find out soon…” Stealing my thunder and leaving me in suspense… Again! NO After that we were already outside on the picnic benches type things (the one that has two benches on either side of the table—I don’t know what they’re called!) and I was sitting on one, facing the table and Luke was sitting on the table, feet beside me. “So…” He smiled down at me. “So,” I repeated smiling up at him. “When are you getting that cast removed?” He asked. “Soon.” I replied. “Soon? That helps…” he rolled his eyes. I chuckled, “Three weeks.” He looked astonished, “Three weeks? Wow.” “Yep, so anyway how is your life going?” I asked looking up at him, eyes lost in his gorgeous ones as they met mine. “Life…” he thought for a moment, “Life is life, I guess.” “No really? I thought it was death.” I said sarcastically. “Well it kind of is,” he said ignoring the sarcasm. “What, why?” I asked him. He shook his head, grinning now, “Yep, so what shall we talk about? I’m getting bored.” “You’re calling me boring, Luke?” I said dramatically, putting my hand to my chest, and gasped, pretending to be hurt. “No, no! Of course not!” He said panicking and when I thought he had believed it I started to laugh. “Chill, dude. I was kidding!” I said still laughing a bit. Then he smirked strangely and said, “I know.” And then before I could say anything else, a big bunch of people joined our table, inviting themselves. So that was that. Later after school Justin and I were standing in the parking lot. I looked straight at him, he was just fourteen and he had grown over four inches over the summer. So now he’s nearly as tall as me, and in a few months I’ll have to look up in his bright blue eyes. I’ve heard from many of the kids in his class say that he’s gonna be the dream guy in high school, the one that’s a jock and blonde hair, blue eyes, tan, tall, muscular and smart. And they’re all jealous of his girlfriend, Angela, who is like, a really nice girl, who doesn’t go around in mini skirts and belly button piercings, etc. But she is really decent, and pretty. Justin is too shy. I don’t see how they can talk about him like that! So anyway I looked at him and I was like, “Right, I’ll call dad.” And so I did and this is the conversation of me and dad. Me: Daddy I need you to pick us up from school! Dad: What did you do to your car?! Me: Um I kind of broke it. Dad: you WHAT!?! Me: Dad, chill, you drove us to school today remember? My leg? Dad: *breathing heavily* Oh… right. Me: Waiting! Dad: Sorry hon. I have a very important meeting in 4 and a half minutes. Me: Ugh, where’s mom? Dad: She has to be at the meeting. Me: Whatever… Bye. Then I hang up on him and turn back to Justin. “So? What did he say?” Justin asked moving his gaze towards me again. “He said that we’re going to have to learn how to fly, to get home faster.” I said casually. He rolled his eyes, “Shannon, is he coming or not?” “Not.” I said, “We’ll have to walk. Come on.” He flung his backpack over his shoulders and carried mine. How generous of him. I was walking really slowly due to my crutches… He was walking behind me anyway because obviously he was too busy texting his friend about some party they’re planning (Don’t ask, I have my ways!) and he’s a guy and guys can’t multitask unlike girls… Yeah yeah yeah. So when he decided he would put it back into his pocket safely, well surely because it ran out of battery, he suddenly started laughing! I turned around and scowled at him, “What?!” He shook his head, “Whatever.” I rolled my eyes, “ Everyone is acting suspicious! Its so annoying!” He laughed a bit more, “Says you, Shan.” I sighed, and continued walking. After a moment Justin breaks the silence again, “Why couldn’t your boyfriend give us a ride?” I stopped and then started again, “I- I didn’t ask him…” “Why not?” he asked obviously amused. And as always, I use my skills and answer something mysterious. “It’s personal.” I say and shrug as if that settles that. Have I ever mentioned that our house is like two miles away from school? I mean I would usually walk, but it’s horrible with a broken leg! Anyway, as Justin caught up with me and stood by my side, looking kind of annoyed that I was walking so slowly, but he had to stand beside me just in case I stumble over some rocks and fall or something just like what I almost did a few minutes ago... Then a car pulled up and waved at us. I turned my head to the left and looked at the driver who was waving and I waved back with a small smile. “Luke. What a surprise.” I said. “isn’t it always?” he joked. “Why are you walking?” “Parents at work. Can’t drive.” I shrugged. “You guys want a ride?” he offered kindly. “Wow, thanks Luke. This means a lot.” I smiled widely, and nudged Justin, “Right Justin?” “Huh? Oh, right. Thanks.” He said. Luke just kept his little smile and got out of the car and helped me in the front seat and told Justin that he could sit at the back. When we got into the car he put on some unfamiliar music that sounded surprisingly good. “Whoa, who’s this by?” I asked impressed. “It’s all me and my band.” He grinned watching the road as he drove. “Oh yeah. I forgot you were in a band. It’s really good, Luke, really.” I said again. “Thanks. But if you like this you’ll love my other albums. I’ll send them to you one day.” He said as he glanced at me. I glanced back at him and smiled, “Really? That would be great, thanks.” “Don’t mention it. If you don’t want to…” He smirked. I rolled my eyes playfully and smiled softly, “Sure thing.” “So how’s your violin practise going?” He asked me. “Violin..? Oh! Of course. Um I haven’t practised recently but I’m getting there soon enough.” I said, amazed at myself for forgetting I was a talented fine violinist. He laughed softly, “Right.” After a while we ended up in a small but deep conversation about cars. Don’t ask how; one minute it was just violins and now it was cars. I could tell it was deep because with in three minutes Justin had the most annoyed expression I’ve ever seen. He parked by his house on the driveway (because we’re neighbours if you forgot!) and then Justin helped me out, handing me my crutches. I took them gratefully and waved to Luke. “Bye, Luke. Thanks so much for the ride.” I said grinning and walking backwards skilfully with my crutches. And then the most typical thing happened, and I can guess that you’re guessing it as well. You’re right. Well of course I didn’t know I was about to trip because I was too into showing off my skills… lunchtime  The days flew by… Everyone was still acting strange, for some reason Kelly was more unhappy with Luke but at the same time wouldn’t leave his side… and now Michael was around again, not wanting to leave my side. That was kind of annoying because I was insisted to sit with his friends and listen to their boring conversation about sport. Not that I couldn’t ditch… I could do that. Anyway, I was just walking with Emily into the cafeteria at Lunch when she finally decides to tell me. “Shannon.” She sighed grabbing my shoulder. “Sexy cast, keep it up, winking face, XX L.D” she said. “What the heck?!” I asked confused. “Some one signed your cast with the initial L.D and that’s what you wanted to know right? Everyone is acting weird when they see your cast is because you have a boyfriend and someone is flirting. No one flirts with the girlfriend of the basketball team captain.” I was then quiet for a moment and I had stopped walking, “L.D, Hmm, could it be, Em?!” I asked squealing. “What!” she demanded. “Luke Dawson.” I laughed “Oh my god!” Emily laughed along, “You’re so lucky that Michael doesn’t know!” “And he won’t...” I sighed and continued walking with my crutches. “I’m pretty sure. He doesn’t look anywhere near that cast when he looks at me.” I rolled my eyes, “Plus, did you see what he wrote? ‘Get better babe, my smokin’ hot lady! Can’t wait to take you out again… Michael Peters XOXOXOX’ … wasn’t that a bit too much?” Emily laughed a bit more and nodded, “Yeah, saw that one.” “Anyway, I think it was nice of Luke to write that. Brave actually.” I smiled as we took our seats and the conversation went on about it. Did I mention that my brother Paul is coming so soon? Its almost Friday. I can't wait! Later on Michael came by. “Hey…” he smiled at me. I smiled up at him, “Yes?” Emily smirked, watching us. She knew that I didn’t really like him. She was upset of course because of Dan being his best friend and double dating and all. But anyway. “I thought you were joining me today for lunch” he said. Luckily I had a good excuse this time. “Nah, I didn’t want Emily to sit alone, since you know, Dan is sick today and couldn’t make it here…” “Oh…” he frowned, “Oh well.” I smiled widely, “Sorry Mike. I guess I’ll see you later.” I said waiting for him to go. “Alright…” he sighed and kissed me, but I pulled away fast. “I’m sorry but my lips feel really chapped. They hurt a lot…” I said putting a hand over my mouth. He frowned, “Okay whatever. Feel better.” He kissed my cheek then left. “Why don’t you just break up with him?” Emily asked, but I could see a small smile playing at her lips. I shrugged though, “Im not really sure. I guess I don’t have the guts. I mean, its so harsh, you know? To be thrown away.” I sighed helplessly. Emily nodded slowly, “I guess..?” she said, making it sound like a question. Emily never gets dumped. She’s the one who ends up saying goodbye. I shook my head and gave her a small laugh. And before you know it, Luke was heading for our table, with a wide toothy smile on him. And a pouting Kelly behind him. “Hey!” Luke exclaimed, plumping down on a seat beside us, “Mind if I— or we—join you?” he asked. Emily shrugged, picking at her carrots. “Um sure. Why not?” I smiled at him then Kelly. Luke sat down then in front of us and Kelly sighed, “Why won’t you sit at my table?” she asked. “well because your table is boring Kells.” He said. Kelly pouted, “Fine.” She said walking away. I smiled just a teensy bit, “Luke, shouldn’t you go after her?” I said when he didn’t. “Nope,” he said. “She’ll be okay.” He said and then turned back to us. “So what’s going on really?” Emily shrugged, “Nothing, we were just going through Shannon’s cast, you know, seeing what people wrote.” She winked at him. I looked down immediately at my drink and Luke actually turned kinda red. Kinda. I looked around the room when that awkward silence started and found Kelly sitting on Michael’s table with other people. I rolled my eyes and turned back again. “Well this is interesting.” Luke said. “Its nice to sit at a table where people are actually calm, you know?” he said looking around the cafeteria. He was right, everyone is so hyper in this school. I smiled at him, “Yeah I know right?” I never noticed that me and Emily were too quiet. I guess we were. So we sat there the rest of the lunch, just being quiet, and talking to each other with body language, and it might sound lame but it was actually quite… relaxing. ((Okay so I'm starting to write again, but it won't be as good I guess! Gotta be patient!)) bigg bubba meets luke (:P)  My biggie brother is here! Paul arrived safely on Friday, and we all (Mommy, Daddy, and Justin) went to the airport to pick him up. “Where is he? Everyone from the flight is out but him!” My mom said eagerly. I was the first to find him. “Paaaaaaaaaaaaul!” I ummm exclaimed running up to him and gave him the biggest huggie ever. “Why hello, there, younger one. How do you do this fine morning?” Paul said in a British accent. I stared at him in disbelief and he laughed, “I’m just kidding with you Shan! How are you baby sister!” he said in his normal voice. My mom rushed over and hugged him tightly. “Oh Paulie my baby. How was your flight? Are you okay? Was everything okay in Europe? Are you tired? Are you hungry? You wanna grab some lunch? You want –“ “Mom, mom!” Paul laughed rolling his eyes, “I’m fine.” Dad welcomed Paul home and so did Justin. “Hey there little wimp.” He winked slapping the back of his head. Justin laughed, “Its good to see you here too.” He said, and that was all. Soon we arrived back home safely, having a nice chat on the way home to the airport, nothing personal though. Mostly Mom and Paul were speaking. Dad chipped in a bunch of times, and so did I but of course Justin was quiet the whole way, secretly texting with his phone. We got home finally and Paul was tired but he didn’t wanna go to sleep. We had some Chinese food (Yummy) and then everyone was back on track and I went to help him unpack his bags. “So what did you get me?” I asked. Paul snorted, “My love.” He said. I laughed and hit him with a pillow, “No seriously, you didn’t get me anything from England?” I faked a pout. “Awwwww,” he said poking me playfully. “Of course I did.” He said going through his bags and pulled out a t-shirt that said I heart London. I took it from him, “Thaaaanks.” I said. “I already have three of these now.” He sighed, “Well I don’t know what else to get you!” He admitted. I smiled, “Its okay Paulie,” I said “it doesn’t matter.” He grinned, “I know.” “Yeah so whats going on in England? A lot of clubbing and partying I suppose?” I said. He just grinned, “That’s right…” I raised an eyebrow. “Okay…” He nodded, “yep, and what’s with you? How’s Emily?” he asked. “Good, she’s fine.” I said nodding and throwing his stuff into the hamper. “And how’s your love life? Any boys yet?” He asked casually. He looked at me when I didn’t answer. “well?” “What?” I asked crossing my arms. “Who’s the guy?” he grinned. I sighed, “I’m dating this guy, Michael.” He opened his mouth to speak. “No, its nothing serious, and no to all the other questions you’re thinking of.” I said before he even asked. He laughed, “you know me too well, sis.” He said. “Lets go for a walk.” He suggested. “Sure, lets go.” I said slipping on my shoes that I took off. Paul did the same and got up, heading out. I followed him out and we got outside and walked, just talking about random things that we talk about. We updated each other on our lives and shared stupid secrets like we always did. “I missed you.” I said for about the eighth time that day. “I missed you tooooooooo.” He replied for the eighth time, and slung his arm over my shoulder. I laughed and slipped my hands in my pocket as we walked. We soon stopped at a park and I saw a familiar figure… called Luke. Luke was there! Him and his angelic face. He was waving at me! “Who’s that? Michael? Nice.” Paul grinned, nudging me. “No.” I blushed a bit. “That’s Luke. Our new neighbour, and he’s my friend.” I said. “We’re Just friends.” Luke walked over to us. “Hey Shannon.” He said then glanced over to my brother. “You must be Paul.” He said and flashed him a smile. “Yeah, you must be Luke. Shannon has told me loads about you.” Paul grinned widely, his devilish smile. I blushed more. Luke chuckled, his eyes flickering to mine and back to his. “Has she now. Its nice to meet you.” He said holding out his hand. Luke nodded, “Yeah, you too.” He said and shook his hand, “and welcome to this neighbourhood man.” “Thanks.” He said letting go of his hand, still keeping eye contact. “So how’s England?” I wondered how Luke knew this stuff. “England is good.” Paul said. “its beautiful, and yeah.” They went on talking for about another ten minutes, non stop. Seriously. They just kept going on an on, and laughing and blah blah blah! And it wouldn’t end. I just stood there, not sure of what to do, thinking of how awkward this was. “Yeah.” I said randomly and they both looked at me as if I was insane. “What?” I asked pouting. They blinked and went back to their conversation. I think they were talking about Pizza. Or the news. Something like that. Finally they ran out of words and I was probably daydreaming because when I snapped out of it, Paul was gone. It was just me and Luke. Eep. “Oh. Hey. Where’s Paul?” I asked. He smiled at me. That smile. Ahh.. “He went to get a drink.” He said nodding over to where he was. I nodded, “Oh cool. So what are you up to?” I asked. “Nothing really. Getting some fresh air.” He said. “And getting some thoughts together.” “What thoughts?” I asked curiously. He just smiled and shook his head. Right. Of course he wasn’t going to tell me. Who was I to know what he was thinking of? Just another girl yeah. “Okay. So how’s Kelly?” I asked. “She wont speak to me.” He sighed. “Why? How is Michael?” he asked. I looked at him for a moment. “Umm I don’t know.” I said. He raised his eyebrows, “He’s your boyfriend you know. You should be more committed into the relationship.” I looked down, feeling guilty. “Hey, look, I’m sorry. Michael is my friend…” he said Wow. Why was he even speaking to me about this? What’s his problem? I was getting furious. Why is Luke acting like this? I looked up at him. “No, you’re right.” He opened his mouth to speak, just when Paul came back. “Hey.” “Thanks.” I said to Luke then looked at Paul. “Hey, lets go.” He looked at me strangely. “O-kay.” He said, glancing at Luke, who’s expression I could not read. “Seeya later then.” Luke nodded, “Okay, bye.” He said before walking away. I took Pauls arm and literally dragged him away. “Ow, hey hey. Whats the matter with you?” he asked. “Nothing….” I groaned. “Lets just go home.” He sighed and then we walked home, silently. CHAPTER 17: NEW BEGINNING !!!!!!  The next morning I woke up, to the sound of the little birds chirping, and then I suddenly starting remembering what happened the previous day with Luke. The whole scene played out in my head again, and I couldn’t help but think that Luke had a point. Michael, After all, he was my boyfriend. Dont get me wrong. I was still kind of pissed at Luke. So I took my cell phone and I wrote a short text to Michael, telling him that i was sorry for behaving the way i have the last few days and that i really want to meet up with him again soon. His reply almost came suddenly. He had a smily face and a heart and said to meet him at the park at ten am so that we could go to breakfast together. And i was actually looking forward to it! To go on a date with Michael! So i got up and got dressed after taking a nice hot shower. I dried my hair and straightened it from the front, deciding it looked okay and then i slipped on a pair of shoes. I was wearing something casual which i now do not remember. So I scurried down the stairs and i told Justin who was sitting at the table, munching his ceral, “Hey Justin? Im going out for a while.” He looked up with me and gave me that look that said ‘Does it look like a frickan care?’ but he was going to have to tell my parents so. “Okay, where?” I grabbed my sunglasses. “I’m going to meet up with Michael for breakfast.” I said “Later.” Then I was walking out the front door. I started making my way to the park, when i saw HIM again. The same him who i was mad at. The same him who I thought i kinda liked and the same him who I thought liked me back. Maybe. Yes, Luke. So I saw him and rolled my eyes, glad he didn’t see me, so I decided to just pretend i never saw him. I continued making my way to the park but unfortunately... I was stopped. “Shannon? Hey!” Luke smiled his smily heartmelting smile. I avoided eye contact but smiled. “Luke. Hey.” “Whats up? You look nice.” I made a face.. “Well I’m going to meet up with Michael..” “Oh...” he said and smiled slightly. “Um thats good.” “Yeah! And what are you doing?” I asked trying not to sound so eager for the answer. He scratched his head. “Nothing. Nothing really, off to meet up with some friends maybe soon.” He said. “Hmm..” i said thinking who that could be. I thought he would have maybe wanted to invite me because i was his first friend.. but i guess he had made better friends. “Actually I was gonna give you a call.” Did he just read my mind or WHAT!? “Oh! Wow. Thanks.” I couldn’t help but smile. He smiled back. “Yeah... so have fun with Michael.” He said. “Right.” I said. “yeah, thanks.” “see ya around then.” He said. I nodded and then started heading off again. I found my way to the park then looked at the time. Five to ten. Hmm. I walked around looking around for Michael, sighing when i had failed to find him. Just a few moments later a pair of hands covered my eyes, and i was blinded. “Guess who.” A voice came. I grinned and took the hands off of my face and turned around and kissed my Michael. *** “You look beautiful.” Michael whispered, kissing my forhead. I smiled. “You too. Handsome, I mean.” And it was true. He actually did look great! He was wearind a reddish purplish teeshirt and some shorts and flip flops. Casual, but he looked very nice. And he smelt sooo good! Yumyumyum. “Thanks.” He said and then we broke our little embrace and he took my hand. I looked down at our hands and intertwined our fingers together and he smiled. “Breakfast?” “Yeah. Breakfast.” I repeated. And we walked together. As soon as we got to the cafe that we were going to have breakfast in, the smell of freshly made strong coffee filled my nostrils. We took seats and then when we sat I looked at Michael. He flashed me a brief smile, and then he handed me a menu. “Here, just take anything and everything you wish. Its all on me.” He said with a smirk. I smiled back and looked through the menu, “Hmm...” I scanned it up and down and then decided to order some chocolate pancakes and a large coffee. After a while a waitress came over to take our order and I told her what I wanted and Michael said: “I’ll have the exact same thing.” I smiled slightly “Copy cat.” I murmured. “Hey!” he laughed flicking a sugar sachet at me playfully. It hit my forehead. “Ow!” I laughed and tossed it back at him but he caught it, smirking at me. I raised my eyebrow, a half smile forming at the corner of my lips. “Thats impressive.” He gave me a knowing smile. “Well after all, I am a star at basketball. You need to know how to catch.” “Mhmm, a star at basketball, but lost one of the most important games of the year.” I replied, smiling back. He stuck out his tongue, “Well it wasn’t exactly my fault was it?” “actually, Michael, it was.” I smiled “No... I was so sick. That was kinda your fault but I did insist you come closer... And and and... I was worried sick about my girlfriend who broke her leg while cheerleading and was sick at the same time and I couldn’t go and see her.” “Aww...” I smiled taking his hand. “Thats so sweet.” I said feeling a bit guilty that I wasn’t thinking about him while he was thinking about me. He smiled slightly, a faint blush forming at his cheeks. “Yeah.” He gave my hand a squeeze. “I’m worried about you sometimes, like when you ignore me. You’re my girl, I care about you.” I smiled, “Im so sorry for acting like that.” I leaned over and kissed his cheek gently. “I care about you too.” And at the moment I was actually beginning to be fond of Michael, and I give all the thanks to Luke. He wrapped his arm around me and gave me a gently kiss. nice day t turned out that not only did we have breakfast together, but we spent the rest of the day with each other too. After breakfast we went out to the park again, hand in hand, this time talking on the way. Yes actually talking. About anything and everything like some normal people would do. “I would like to meet him some time.” Michael said, sitting down on the bench and pulling me on his lap. The corners of my mouth lifted into a smile. “Yeah I know. He’s a cool guy.” We ad just finished talking about my brother, Paul, who for some reason has never met Michael. It was about five pm now, and yes I did get some calls from my parents and a few texts from Emily and some other friends. But for now I wanted to be with him. “So let’s grab a hotdog or something?” he asked, stroking my hair. I wrapped my arms around his neck, smiling. “Yeah sure, I’m not that hungry though, so you can get one.” He smiled and kissed my forehead. “You sure you’re not hungry?” he asked getting up with me, and leading us to the Hot Dog stand. “I’m suuure.” I reassured him. “Okay.”He said and ordered one for himself and paid for it. I watched him as he took the hotdog, thanked the guy and then walked off with me, taking a big bite of it. It did look pretty good. So I took it from his hands and took a bite from it as well. He grinned, shaking his head. “Hey, I thought you weren’t hungry?” “Mmmm, I know.” I said handing it back to him. “Just testing it.” “If you want we can go back and get another one.” He said. I just shook my head, “Nahh I’m fine for now.” So yeah, we just kept talking and talking, laughing and joking, and running after each other, until sunset. The time flew by quickly. Now we were lying down on the grass, by a tree, snuggled close together as we watched the sunset. It was very beautiful, almost perfect. Everything felt perfect. Talk about romantic. But... It was kind of boring. Just watching the sunset, not saying anything. I wasn’t even tired after all that time. I don’t think I would ever be tired of doing this with him. I was still hyped up. And so was Michael. He was grinning down at me. “Romantic eh?” “Sure.” I said smirking. “But boring as hell.” He laughed lowly, “Thank God, I was thinking the same thing.” He said. “Its getting pretty late now isn’t it. If you want we could finish off the day with some nice Pizza for dinner?” I giggled. “That sounds lovely. But first I’m gonna go home and change my clothes.” I warned. He smiled, “Sure thing. I will too. So we can walk by my place first, I’ll get changed then I’ll take my bike and we can drive to your place.” He said, a teasing smile on his face. I rolled my eyes, “Your bikeeeee?” I said. He chuckled, “Would you prefer I take the car?” He said, pinching my chin playfully. “Actually, yes.” I said pecking his lips gentlty. He smiled, “Okay, babe.” He said and got up with me, taking my hand. I didn’t mind it when he called me that this time. I got up and then we walked to his place, talking about whatever there was left to talk about. Our conversations were random. Really random. So random and stupid, for a moment we were talking about toothbrushes and then Barney the Dinosaur. We got to where his house and then he led me to his room, which was surprisingly clean, the way I left it for him last time I came over. “See? I keep the room nice and clean now.” He said showing off his bedroom. “And I do it all by myself.” I grinned, “Yeah, Your mommy must be proud!” He nodded, brightly. “Yes! She’s very happy! She thinks its because of you!” I laughed, “Well isn’t it?” I asked. “Hmmm, yes.” He agreed. “Indeed it is.” He said then opened his cupboard and took out some nice clean clothes. “I’ll be right back.” He said taking the clothes into the bathroom. I nodded. “okay.” I said and waited, wandering about in his room. After a few moments he emerged from the room, topless, his clean shirt in his hand. “Ah there it is.” He said grabbing the cologne from his desk, and spraying it all over himself. My cheeks turned slightly red at the sight, but I smiled. He looked surprisingly hot. Not as much as Luke, I admit. But he looked great. And smelled great as well. He grinned at me, “What are you staring at?” he asked pulling the shirt over his head. I blushed and looked away, “Noothiiingg...” He kissed my cheek and led me outside so we could go drive to my place. His parents were outside as well and they saw us, and smiled. Michael chuckled. “Guess we’re gonna have to say Hi first.” He said and waved at his parents. I waved at them as well, smiling, trying to be polite. His mom came to us. “Hey darlings. Where are you off to?” she asked. Michael smiled slightly, squeezing my hand. “Nowhere, we were gonna go get some pizza.” He told her. “You guys need anything?” “Nope.” His dad said, coming up behind his wife, smiling at us. “You kids go have fun.” “Okay thanks dad. Bye, mom, dad.” He said slowly leading me away. “Bye, mister and Mrs. Peters!” I called, catching up with Michael. He opened the passenger seat of his Mustang to me and then i hopped in and we drove off to my place, bobbing our heads to the stereo. Even though i despised his music. He parked at my place and looked at me. “I’ll wait here.” “Um sure, if you want to.” I said, smiling at him. “I’ll try not to be long.” And then I rushed into the house, bumping into Paul. “Hey sis.” He said. “Back from breakfast?” He smirked. “Actually, no. I’m going to get changed, we’re going out for pizza. Michael’s waiting outside.” I said and rushed up the stairs and into my room, ripping off my dirty clothes and tossing them in the hamper. I had accidentally left the door open. And my brother Justin just happened to be walking passed my room. “Eww!” He yelled and ran back to his room, obviously scarred for life. I blushed. I wasn’t even completely naked. “Grow up!” I yelled, shutting the door. I changed into a dress and s[rayed some perfume on and washed my face and put on some makeup and did my hair so it looked neat, grabbed my bag and headed downstairs, and outside. Paul was talking to Michael. Great I thought and smiled joining them. Michael broke away from the conversation then stole a glance at me. “Ready to go?” He asked softly. “Yeah. Lets go.” I said ONE word  he night had ended pretty soon. We left the restaurant at about eleven pm and he dropped me back home. But that wasn't the end of it really. I got home and everyone was fast asleep. So i sprinted up to my room and changed into my pj's. Then as i got into bed I checked my phone for messages, then I replied to Emily. I saw one from Luke too. I quickly read it and replied to it, and he sent an instant reply back, I was just about to reply when I recieved a text from Michael.  I talked to Michael until I fell asleep. And you better remember that bit or you'll be wondering later on... The next morning was Sunday. Sunday morning. The best time of the week. As I woke up a smelt freshly cooked eggs and cinnamon rolls and pancakes and french toast.  "Yummy." I said and jumped out of bed and made my way to the bathroom. I showered and bla bla the usual and went downstairs. "Good morning pumpkin." My dad greeted me with a kiss on the cheek. "Morning dad." I replied and sat down at the table. "Good morning mom, Paul, Justin." I sighed, and they replied. So yeah, Breakfast went well. I picked up my cell phone but it was out of charge. "Damn it." i muttered and went to search for the charger, and when I found it (at the last place I looked) I put it on charge. When it had charged I saw an unread message from Luke. He had sent it to me the night before and I didnt even bother to read it. Feeling bad I opened it and read it. It said to meet him at starbucks for breakfast. I felt bad because i had already had breakfast and it was now almost noon. I decided to give him a call. "Shannon." He answered when I dialed his number. "Luke! I'm so sorry. I didn't read your text until now. My battery was out of charge. But maybe we could hang out later.." I bit my lip. "Uhh yeah sure. It's okay, I just thought maybe we could chill this morning but its okay. I'm with Kelly at the moment instead." he said. "Oh.." i said, not knowing how to feel. I guess I didn't feel anything. "Thats good." "So... You and Michael are really close and stuff now right?" I smiled slightly at that. "Yeah I guess so." Then we talked for a short moment before awkwardly ending the conversation. The way Luke had talked to me wasn't the same. He seemed more distant. But it didn't matter anymore to me. I mean yeah, I did like Luke. But now I know he's just a friend. And I was getting along with Michael now, so I was happy. Later that day as I was doing some homework I got a message from Luke again. I opened it and it said: Hey Shannon. I'm going out of town for a while and I don't know when I'll be back. My grandma is very sick and we have to go be with her. I'm leaving first thing tomorrow. Sorry for short notice. Will miss you. Luke. I gasped and called him but his phone seemed to be off. I then ran to his house and knocked on the door but no one was home. I went back home, extremely upset. I went up to the study and looked through the window, hoping to see Luke. His curtains were drawn. I sighed and got a piece of paper and wrote: Luke. Where are you? Call me as soon as you read this. I want to meet you. Shannon. I waited for a really long time in that room, sitting by the window, doing homework and reading to pass time. Yeah, I texted Michael a couple of times as well. And I also kept trying to reach Luke but it was not working. Where was he? It came to me that I should call Kelly. I quickly found her number in my contacts list and gave her a call, nervously waiting for her to pick up. "Hello?" she answered after a few rings. "Hey Kelly! Do you know where Luke is?" I blurted. "Uhh, no. He left here a while ago. He's not picking up his phone. Why?" she asked curiously. "Did he tell you he was going out of town?" I asked frowning. "What? No! He's not going out of town!" She exclaimed. "He sent me a message saying that." "Oh my God! Is he? How could he not tell me! And tell YOU? Whats wrong with him!" she cried. "Sorry.." i murmured. "If you hear anything from him, please tell me. I can't believe he's leaving like that." "Yeah, you too." she sighed and hung up. I bit my lip, thinking of what to do. What was wrong with him? Where was he? I hadn't heard from him for the next few days either. It worried me sick. Like really really much. I couldn't do anything properly. Why wasnt he contacting me? he has my number. he has my email address. he knows where I live. And on the other hand I dont know where he is, and when He'll be back. His phone still hasnt been picked up. School has been so boring. Kelly has been so not worried! And I have been so miserable. And for that Michael is kind of mad at me. Why doesn't anyone understand? What was his problem? Emily and Dan have been very intimate, but supportive. At least I have them. But I know I'm being a little distant to everyone. And I feel really guilty. But I just need to hear from him. One word.   Michael sucks.  Shannon. Shaaaaaannon. Helloo? EARTH TO SHANNON." Emily banged my head with the book I was reading. "Ow! Em! I can hear you." I rubbed my head where she hit me. "Well yeah, you're hearing me, but you're not listening! Where are you?!" she leaned back, taking the book with her. I sighed. We were at school now and it was lunch time. I was sitting on the table alone with Emily. It had been two weeks now and I still hadn't heard from Luke. My parents had not heard from his parents either. Nobody that I could ask knew where he was. And the worst part was that it seemed like I was the only one worried about him. Worried sick. Like even more than I was before. Emily keeps saying that he will come back, Dan keeps saying that he's okay and that he will contact us soon, my parents say that they're going to have to come back because their things are still here, Kelly has moved on from him and Michael says that he probably won't come back but "it'll be okay" and I should just "forget about him for now". As much as I love Michael(which I think I do) he's starting to act not himself lately. Whenever I go to him he tenses up and doesn't even look at me. And when I talk to him now he wont even talk back properly. But I guess it's still just me. After all, I'm obviously not myself these days. How can I not worry about my friend who just disappeared? "I was reading that..." I murmured, ducking my head down, feeling guilty for not listening to Emily. "You know what? Nevermind. I was going to tell you what an amazing day I had yesterday but I guess you don't want to hear it." Emily got up. "Noooooo, Em. I do! I'm just not... okay." I said. Emily sighed and sat down. "I know. You should go talk to Michael. I think you're leaving him out a bit now, always worrying about Luke." I gave her a look. "Seriously." She rolled her eyes. "Just go. Here comes Dan." She waved at him. "Fine." I said and waved at Dan before getting up to go to Michael. "Hey." I said slipping in next to him where he was sitting with a few other people. They were all doing their own stuff, not even talking to eachother. Michael was texting. He put his phone in his pocket as I sat. "Oh. Hey." "What were you doing..?" I asked. "Nothing, just texting." he shrugged, picking up his soda from the table. "Okay..." I nodded "So..." He glanced at me. "Okay. Look, I'm sorry for being kind of distant to you lately. I promise this ends now. I really like you Michael." I said. Michael smiled. "Don't worry about it. How about we go out tonight for dinner or something. Anything you want." I smiled happily. "Really?" This was a serious change of attitude. Like yesterday he was so different. I guess he just wanted an apology. Psh, guys. "Yeah. Okay I'll pick you up at like... errr sixish Kay? Okay gottagoseeyalaterbye." He said and got up, leaving after looking down at his watch and then he rushed out the door. "Ummm... Okay." I said, watching him leave. There were ten minutes left for lunch and I wondered where he had to go. So after school that day I informed everyone at home that I was going out with Michael. I was actually pretty excited. We hadn't gone out in a while, and I missed this. I'm just gonna set aside my worries for a while and just have a good time. I went upstairs and got dressed, taking nearly an hour and a half. By the time it was six, I had already done last minute checking and was waiting by the doors, in a red dress and heels. He stood me up. He never came to pick me up. He didn't even return my calls. I was soooooooooooo angry. I seriously wanted to wrap my fingers around his little neck and squeeze it until--- well yeah so anyway. HOW COULD HE HAVE DONE THIS TO ME? At exactly seven fifteen, I kicked off my heels, stomped up the stairs and banged my door shut and started throwing things around before calling Emily. "HE FREAKING STOOD ME UP, AND HE WON'T PICK UP HIS STUPID PHONE! HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE HERE AN HOUR AGO." I yelled. There was a rather awkward pause. "Hello..?" I said, softer. "Shannon. Calm down. Michael stood you up? Woaaaaaaah. Thats weird. Dump him." She said easily. "What? No. He's not getting rid of me that easily." I muttered. "Look, if he's gonna stop showing up at dates and stop answering your calls..." She sighed. "Look, you wanna be the Dump-er. Or the Dump-ee?" "What? Agh. Em. Nevermind, I'll talk to him at school or something." I sighed and hung up. I spent the night doing homework instead of being out. This was NOT fair. future to come  I woke up that morning early. On a saturday. I groaned and rolled out of bed thinking of what had happened yesterday. I pouted and walked into the bathroom angrily and got dressed. I then went outside and dialed Michael's number after checking for any messages or missed calls. There were none. 4 rings later he picked up. "Hey babe." My eyes narrowed. "Don't you have something to say to me?!" I asked him angrily and sarcastically. "Uh. No." he said confused. "How are you..?" "Oh, me? I'm definitely and absolutely NOT FINE. Where WERE you last night? You were supposed to come pick me up by six! I tried calling you so many times! Michael!" "Oh right! Sorry I forgot." He said, as if thats that. "You.. FORGOT!?!" I yelled in absolute shock. I know I was being a little over dramatic but I was sick of this. "Yeaaaaah. I forgot." He said. "Sorry." "You know what? I know you're not sorry. You don't have to pretend like you are. If you wanna break up with me just do it. You're always ignoring me and being all distant and stuff and now you bail on me? What's gotten into you?!" I shouted. "Shannon! Stop yelling!" He yelled. "You're yelling!" I snapped. Pause. He took a breath. "Look. Shannon. I'm sorry. There was a lot on my mind the other day and I forgot. I got... Distracted, you know. I know you're mad. But I'll make it up to you." "Thats NO excuse! You've been out for so long. Why don't you tell me anything?! Have you ever thought that maybe if you opened up a little that I could help you out, and you know I would understand!" I yapped at him. "But you wouldn't understand! Okay!" "Try me!" I dared. "No. Look I don't want to hurt you. Just calm down. I'll make it up to you!" "Yeah. Okay you do that." I said and hung up. After that phone call I just stood there and tried to calm down, trying to think straight and just make myself realise what happened and whats probably going to happen. I closed my eyes. I talked to the little voice in my head. Okay. You just had a fight with Michael. It's just a fight. It happens with everyone. Alright. Lets think this out. He's being a jerk, and you totally deserved to blow out on him. He won't talk to you, he wont sit with you anymore and he doesn't even seem interested anymore. But he doesn't want to break up. What could this mean? Maybe he still likes you but he's going through a rough phase. It can't be his family because your parents are friends with his and they're perfect... It's something he's obviously hiding from you. What could he be hiding from me? And why? Its either something good or bad. Maybe he's using me..? Or has he completely LOST it? Maybe I should just give him some space. And he'll come running after me again like he used to. Gosh, I miss those times. Actually I do. Luke used to be there too. Ahh I miss Luke. If he was here I would SO be hanging out with him right now. And not even to get Michael jealous. Because he's someone who actually understands me and he's a great friend and he just knows what to say and do at the right time. I miss Luke.. Ah he would have made me feel better right away. He was cool that way. I wonder when he's going to come back. Wait.. I'm getting distracted this is supposed to be about Michael. Alright?! Oh I wish Luke was here! He would make me feel like Michael isn't worth it.. But is he? i don't know! All I know is that Luke would have made me feel better. This isn't fair! WHERE IS HE WHEN I NEED HIM THE MOST? AREN'T FRIENDS SUPPOSED TO BE THERE FOR YOU? I think I'm gonna turn around and scream. I turned around and prepared myself to let it all out in a big, loud, deafening, blood-curdling, rambunctious and deadly scr-- "I'm here." he laughed. "Luke." friends :D  Okay, so I know you were totally not expecting that, because neither was I. But it's exactly what had happened. He was here. Luke was here. Standing right before my own eyes. And I wasn't dreaming. Or Hallucinating. Was I? Nah, I don't think so. It seemed too real. But I didn't understand one thing. Why is he laughing at me? But I didn't care if he was laughing at me. He was BACK! I was too busy attacking him with a huge hug to notice. "Ohmigosh. You're really back!" I squealed as if I was still trying to convince myself he was actually here. "You have a lot of explaining to do, mister. Do you know how much I was worrying about you? Where were you Luke? I needed you. You weren't here. You never even tried to contact me, ever. You know I'm actually really mad at you, but I'm not showing it because you're finally here and I don't want to spoil the moment. And did you know that your giiirlfriend is like--" "Shannon, Shannon." He smirked, shaking his head. "Shut up. " I felt my face heat up. I was really just blabbering and embarassing myself, so I shut up, looking up at him after stepping back, releasing my tight grip from around him. "I'm sorry." he said, finally. "I tried, you know, to contact you and stuff." "Well..?" "Come with me. Lets take a walk." he gave me a slight push from behind which caused me to jerk ahead and start walking. So I made him start all the way from the beginning. Turns out that he really did leave because his grandma was sick. Apparently Lukes father was very close to her and when he found out she was diagnosed with cancer they had to go there as soon as possible. "I know thats still not an excuse for not contacting anyone," He had said, and I knew from his look that he WAS sorry. "It's just that it was really messed up over there. Everyone was upset and I was so busy. And to top it off my grandma lived in the middle of nowhere and had no internet connection. There were no signals coming up there either, but that didnt matter because I lost my phone anyway." he sighed. "I really am sorry." I took some time digesting this and I understood. "It's okay, Luke. I was just worried. I get it now, you don't have to be sorry about anything. Hows your grandma now? Any better?" "Oh, yeah. She died." "Luke." I said feeling really bad and sorry and somewhat guilty. I stopped walking and faced him, giving him a comforting hug. I felt his arms ravel around my body, really gently though. "It's alright. She's in a better place now. She's eased off from the pain that was to come. She's not suffering any more. Anyway, she was happy when she died, you know? It was really... Like she was at total peace." "Are you alright?" I asked softly. "I'm fine, Shannon." He reassured me. And to lighten up the mood he laughed, and we parted from eachothers arms. "All right. Good." I said firmly, smiling. "I'm glad you're back in one piece. It wasn't the same without you Luke." "I bet it wasn't." he grinned, his perfect set of teeth showing. "As for.. Kelly? Who cares about her, right? Didn't I end it with her yet?" I couldn't help but laugh. "Uh, no!" I said. "Oops. Must have forgotten." He dug out his phone, which was new as I noticed. "Should I do it over the phone? Would that make me a total jerk?" I thought about it. "Actually, no. You don't know what she's like. She'll be fine. Go ahead." He nodded and looked for her number. "I had some numbers written down in a book, if you're wondering." he said before I could ask. Then he pressed his phone to his ear, grinning at me. "Hey Kelly... Yeah it's me Luke.. Ahan.. Yeah, about that... I think I'm kind of dumping you... Yeah. Listen, it's not you, it's me... Actually, it's you. Yeah. Sorry. A certain someone told me I was too good for you anyway. Later, bro." he hung up and winked at me. I looked at him in shock, not believing he actually did that. "Luke. That. Was. AMAZING. I love you for that. How did it go?" "Welll.... She was okay I guess. She was with a guy anyway so it didn't really matter to her, I suppose." He shrugged. "Oooooh." i nodded, walking with him again at a steady pace. "So you and Michael are still good, I see?" he looked at me. "Ugh!" I rolled my eyes. "I don't even want to talk about him right now. I think he hates me anyway. Please, anyway." Although my day had started out terrible because of a certain someone (start with 'M' and rhymes with Cycle), in the end, I was glad that I had a friend back. the call  The week passed quick. Luke and I had a lot of catching up, and that was about done. But you all must be aching to know what was going on with me and Michael meanwhile. It was Saturday. I hadn't really seen him since the last time I saw him, which was a while ago. We did talk briefly on the phone, or have dead text conversations... but that was it. He either finally realised he missed me, or maybe realised how desperate I was for his attention(after I sent him numerous amounts of voice mail in which I cried like a baby, when he wasn't answering my calls. Ehmm.) because finally we were going on a date! Like a proper date. And this time it was his plan, and he wasn't cancelling. He said he would pick me up at five and we would go bowling and then have coffee together at our favourite cafe. But I insisted I would come over to his house instead and we could go together from there so that I was sure he wouldn't bail on me or 'forget' again. I was overwhelmed. Seriously. At three o'clock I started to freak out. I was obviously sure that he was falling out of love with me. I needed to get that back. I wanted him to love me. I didn't want to lose him. I needed to make sure everything was perfect. But too bad because the dress I picked out for tonight was tight. "HE DOESN'T LOVE ME ANYMORE BECAUSE I'M FAT. I'M FAT!" I yelled at myself in the mirror, naked, examining my fat body. Where did I go wrong? How did I not realise this? I jumped on to my weighing scale. I had gained. I had definitely gained three pounds. The next half hour I spent curled up in a ball, on my bed, locked inside my room, wailing and wailing. I was in the middle of my wail, when Luke called me. I picked up and wailed through the line, meaning to say 'Hello'. "Shannon? Again?" he didn't sound surprised. "Y-yeah, it's m-me." I croaked, forcing myself to suck it up. I know I was crying for stupid reasons but my hypothalamus thought otherwise... He sighed. Crying was usual for me now. I cried a lot. He was used to it now. "Fine, I'm coming." he muttered before hanging up. Few minutes later he was over. I had convinced my brain that I was okay. My eyes were still swollen though. Luke invited himself inside my room and closed it behind him, plumping down next to me. "What did he do this time? I swear, if you weren't this crazy about him I would go up there and-" "I'm fat!" I blurted, interrupting him. "Huh?" He blinked. I tossed my dress at his face. "It doesn't fit me! I gained three pounds!" "Thats ridiculous. Three pounds isn't enough to make a difference on your shape. You look great." "No I dont! I had it all planned out. I was going to wear this dress with those heels and braid my hair like this and use this colour lipgloss but now I'm so fat and he's never going to love me and-" "Shannon." he held me by my shoulders. There was a pause where he made eye contact with me. "You. Look. Great." I was compelled. "Thanks. I mean yeah, okay...." I gave in. "But the dress?" "Screw the dress! You have a million in there!" he pointed to my cupboard. "You look stunning in every single one of them and if you think he doesn't realise that..." he trailed off and sighed. "Just wear something else, I promise. I'm telling you as a guy, not as a friend. You're hot and it's obvious." The little talk with Luke convinced me I was okay and then at four o clock I arrived at Michael's house, wearing something totally unplanned, but I guess it was okay because I looked even better in this dress than the one that wouldn't fit. He answered the door on the second ring. When he opened the door, we just looked at eachother for six seconds before he smiled. "Right on time." He took me up to his room. He wasn't dressed yet. I sat on his bed comfortably and waited for him to get ready in the bathroom. As I was waiting I heard his phone buzz. Coincidentally it was right next to me. No, I shouldn't. That's just rude. No way to build trust. But I couldn't keep my mind off it. It kept buzzing. Finally I picked it up and looked at the caller ID. Confused, I picked up and pressed it against my ear. "Oh, finally, Michael. I've been calling for so long. So when is your little date going to end? Are you planning on ending it today? Just come by when you're done with her!" I dared not say a word. I hung up right away and pushed the phone aside, looking disgusted. "Kelly." "Did you say something babe?" Michael walked out of the bathroom, dressed now, heading over to get his phone. He looked at me. "Looks like you saw a ghost." "I might have." As we got into his car, we decided to skip bowling and head on to the cafe. I didn't feel like bowling. I just couldn't look at him. Was I being cheated on? It was starting to make sense now. I wasn't going to mention that to him though. We took a seat in the booth, sitting across from each other. He placed his hand on mine. "You sure you're okay? I know I've been a jerk to you these past few days. I'm really sorry.. It's just that-" Oh crap. Crapcrapcrapcrapcrap. He was breaking up with me. I needed to stop it. I couldn't let this happen, not like this. I needed to do something and fast. "I forgive you!" I blurted. He looked taken aback. "I get it. You have other things to do, you have a life. I totally trust you and I get it. I love you Michael." Making him feel guilty. "I.. Love you too." he murmured and kissed my hand, not taking his eyes off it for a moment. There, that should give me some time to figure this out. Later that night Michael dropped me home, and walked me to the porch like he usually did. "So.." I looked at him. "So?" "Good night?" "Is that a question?" "I don't know?" "All right then." I stood up on my tip-toes and pressed a kiss against his lips. His hands appeared on my hips. I worked on bringing him closer, slipping my arms arouns his neck. I usually wouldn't let him get more than that but I was desperate. He was slipping away from me. I deepened it up and encouraged him to go further. It was definitely working because there was no sign of him wanted to pull away from me. Instead he was holding me closer. Boys, smh. Gradually it died out and we parted away. "Goodnight." I whispered and then he left. I called Luke. "I need you to accompany me. I have a plan." stalkers  We followed Michael to a place unknown. We stayed close behind him, but far enough so that he didn't notice us following him. We kept driving for about ten minutes until he came to a stop. "Why are we doing this again?" Luke grunted. "To find out if he's really cheating on me." Luke had found this whole situation hilarious. He couldn't stop laughing after I filled him up on the news. Now we were here, and we would just have to watch and wait. But where were we? I'd never been to this place before. It was a small house that he walked into. We waited five minutes but he didn't come out. "So can we leave now?" Luke asked. "No! You have to go in there!" I looked at him. "Me?! I can't barge into someone's house like that!" "But I have to know what he's doing.. And I can't go! Whar if he sees me?" After some more arguing I convinced him to go. When he came back a few minutes later he reported the news. "Didn't see or hear much. He's with a girl, definitely. Don't know who or why." "What! Why didn't you check?" He was coming my way! I had to get out of there. Can't be sure he's cheating on you though. "So it wasn't Kelly?" I asked. "No idea." With that we went back home. I couldn't get much sleep last night, but I got enough to wake up early the next morning. I went through my phone. No new messages. I sighed and called Emily. I talked to her about everything that's been going on.((Ahhhhhhhhh i Can't think of what to put here. I mean, I know what I want to happen next but I don't know how to get ther. i hate thisssssss)) ((And it's gone. Later guys.)) life etc.  his had all transformed into a hideous sort of irony, wouldn't you say? Who was he to me? A friend, if not nothing at all? A few months ago I could never imagine, not in a million years, in a different dimension or in another life, that this existing, living, breathing nothing, would be the one keeping me up at nights. The one making me giddy inside. The one that I tried to look my best for. The one that made me happy. The one that I would love. The One. It all comes down to that day. That day when he forcibly made me go out with him. When he insisted that we should kiss goodnight. When he fooled me into thinking he loved me. If it weren't for that night, I would never be in this wreck as I was now. I would be the normal, sane teenager who didn't force her neighbour to break into someone's property. The funny thing is, I never showed interest in him. But he still tried his best to make this work. I kept trying to find a way out, a nice way out. And somehow, suddenly the situation reversed. I fell head-over-heels in love with him and slowly, he reversed and drove away from me. BUT WHY SHANNON WHY, you must be wondering. HE HAS BEEN A COMPLETE AND UTTER DOUCHE TO YOU. Yes, indeed he has. So why do I love him? Maybe it's his cute grin that stretches miles across his face and leaves the deepest dimple on his left cheek which I like to kiss. Or it might just be the way we never understood each other but still managed to be happy together. Maybe it was how he would make me so angry, then apologise softly with his deep voice through the phone that would make my heart melt. Or how he would open my hair whenever it was tied and tell me I look beautiful. So you must understand. I admit he's been more than impossible lately, but there was a time when he was great. He had made me fall for him after all. I just needed to find him again. ((to be continued.)) the broken hearted  Well. It was right in front of me all along. Perhaps love had blinded me, preventing me from seeing it. Or maybe, deep inside, I knew, but never wanted to accept. It was a lot to take in. And it really hurt. Stung, more like, right in the heart. But this was life, right? Things like this happened. It sucks, we move on. But why was this so hard ? He cheated. Michael- the boy I grew to love- betrayed me. He straight out hammered my heart into a hundred million pieces. Of course I'd be alright, though. I wouldn't let myself become one of those girls who spend all their time, hung over on one guy who broke their hearts this one time when they were vulnerable teenagers. I hated those kind of girls. I had gone to see him that next day. I couldn't take it. I had to talk to him. I just couldn't hold it in anymore. I needed to know. It was killing me, and frankly I didn't think this dude, whoever he thought he was, had the right to kill me, to make me feel this way. I deserved much better and I wasn't going to wait around to get what I deserved anymore. I was going to go right out there and get it for myself. I was all hyped up, marching towards his house, angrily, that I forgot what I was supposed to say to him. It was only when I was a couple of yards away when I realised this. Crap! What do I say? I can't afford to go make a fool out of myself there.. I thought, slowing down my pace, thinking. Screw it, I'll improvise! I was banging on the door as hard as I could, impatiently, waiting for him to answer it. Finally he did. It was incredibly obvious that he was surprised to see me. And not the 'Oh my God, Shannon! What a lovely surprise, it's so great to see you, you should visit me spontaneously more often!' kind of surprised, but more like a 'Oh.. It's you again. What on earth are you doing here, you should have called first.' kind of surprised. I didn't really appreciate the second kind. Michael held the door half opened and just stared at me as if I was someone he once knew. And perhaps I was. I definitely will be, now. "Shannon." he finally smiled, that half crooked smile I learned to fall in love with. Except it wasn't the same. He wasn't happy to see me. I could tell from his eyes. He couldn't figure out why I was here, or what to say. "Hi." I looked at him, with my best poker-face on. He couldn't know how I was feeling inside, yet. "Aren't you going to invite me in?" I asked. Hellos were too mainstream. "Um, yeah. Come on in." he opened the door further, leading me to the living room. "What's up? Are you okay?" he asked. Hah. As if he was actually worried about me. OBVIOUSLY I'm not okay. You should know that! Why would I be okay. Why do you do this to me, why do you make me feel this way? "Uh huh... I just wanted to ask you something.. It's stupid really.. But it's bothering me." I said, rather quickly. He raised his brows and looked at me in a strange way. "Alright." he folded his arms, ready to listen. "I picked up your phone the other day." I started. "It was Kelly. She said something about you planning to break up with me?" I asked, examining his face. "You answered my phone?" He asked. His expression was blank. So hard to read! "Yes.. But that's irrelevant!" "I don't know what you're talking about. Of course I don't want to break up with you." he said, trying to reassure me. I didn't buy it, of course. "Alright, fine. Okay, don't get creeped out, but I followed you after you dropped me home." I said, hoping he didn't react wildly. " What? " he widened his eyes, looking at me. "Why? Are you crazy?" "Yes. No. Maybe. Okay, but look. You were with someone. I know it. You know it. Who is it, Michael, just tell me. Are you cheating on me with Kelly? Michael, look, this isn't fair. I don't deserve to be treated like this. What's going on?" I ranted on and on, as he just stared at me in disbelief. "Kelly? God, no. She's like my sister." he muttered, shaking his head. That's all he said. I watched him, expectantly. Wasn't he going to defend himself? Nope. "Who is it?" I asked again, calmly, through gritted teeth. Just then, as if right on time, someone skipped down the stairs, entering the living room. "Michael, where did you go? I've been waiting so long." said the familiar, feminine voice. "I told you to stay upstairs." he muttered, closing his eyes as she walked into the room. The girl stopped in between her next step forward, and stared at me. She was wearing his shirt. Only. This is what hurt more than anything else. I guess I would have felt a little better if it was just Kelly he was hooking up with behind my back, but this was intolerable, hardly reparable. Even insufferable at one point. The first thing I could think of was how could they do this to me? "Emily?" I looked at her, not believing it. My very own best friend? I could just feel the years of friendship flush down the drain. How could she do this to me? How could she do this to her own boyfriend. She was starting to explain herself to me, and so was Michael. They were both trying to say something, but it didn't matter. I wasn't going to stick around to hear it. Something like this wasn't easily forgiven. I just had to leave with the little dignity I had left. No way was I standing there in front of the traitors, letting them humiliate me by just their presence. Soon I found myself locked up in my study. I didn't cry, not once. I just needed some time to process it all. I was locked inside for hours, in the same position. My cell phone kept buzzing inside my pocket, but i just ignored it. My family soon realised where I was, and tried to reach out. Eventually, the person I needed the most came, right at the perfect time, and he was the only person I let in. Luke. new beggining Luke walked over to where i was sitting and wraped his arms around me. As soon as he touched me my eyes flooded with tears and i tried so hard to stop but i just couldnt. He leaned in and said,   "I LOVE YOU SHAN!" I didnt know what to say to him, i just told him the truth,   "I LOVE YOU TO LUKE."  Publication Date: April 28th 2016 https://www.bookrix.com/-nxc198a3e397e55
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-sinister-cutlass-a-tale-of-two-sorcerers/
Sinister Cutlass A Tale of Two Sorcerers The Coup D'etat Jabril Halabi It was early summer, and the day had been oppressively humid. Now, evening breezes swept through the streets of Agrabah, lifting the aroma of cooking meat in the marketplace, drifting over the heads of sleeping children, and guttering the lamp flames in scholars' windows. The sweet scent of orange blossoms crept into the palace on playful zephyrs, meandering through the garden into a chamber where Sultan Talal Sayegh hosted an evening of public discussion.   A comfortable, spreading man in his sixties, Talal had mastered the art of mixing business with pleasure.   Around a large carpet, under the dusky glow of iron chandeliers, he and twenty-four of his advisers, diplomats, and financial managers lounged on couches, making a low din of conversation. Talal had arranged for coffee and sweet tea on small tables, and for dishes of rice, lamb, aubergine and other vegetables. He thoughtfully held audience in this hall, where access to the garden through the loggia allowed drowsy guests to carry their conversations on a walk, and to refresh themselves in the night breeze.  Purple vistas of the glittering city, as well as the pervasive fragrance of flowers and shisha smoke, charmed the night.   Well, let it never be said that Talal Sayegh lacked style.   Yes, he had set up rather an elegant fortnightly ritual in this hall, and these nights pleased his heart as well as his ego. Each of Talal's ministers, while they happily enjoyed conversation with colleagues, also vied for the chance to educate and impress their sultan (whether all of them received this boon by the end of the night was another matter entirely). Talal basked in the glow of their regard, and mulled over the new information they provided him from each department of his administration. A skinny young scribe, seated cross-legged at a small mint-green writing desk behind the sultan, took down volumes with his reed pen.   Talal had even taken the liberty of inviting a philosopher, a humorist, and a mathematician to these discussion evenings, just to add some spice.   Some men discreetly turned away from the mathematician's and philosopher's abstruse musings. Others, however, genuinely enjoyed the intellectual challenge of listening. Talal, for his part, really liked it when the humorist teased him.   Not all members of Talal's senior staff were quite so jolly during these discussion evenings. It was no secret that the sultan was self-indulgently fickle about his conversation partners, and the list of people he invited into his salon had little to do with his true preferences. It's just that he thought it was a crying shame to discuss sordid matters of shekels and dinari on such lovely nights like this.   Most of Talal's financial men were forced to compete for his attention, many times spending several hours in the sultan's hall, waiting for a chance to speak to him... that might never come. Many of these men commiserated over coffee about this ignominious and inefficient state of affairs, but they eventually passed off Talal's eccentricity as a symptom of his advanced age, and went back to work.   Jabril Halabi was not like these men.   On his way to fourty years old, Jabril was bald on the top of his head, with an expanding paunch and protuberant brown eyes. He sagged resignedly into the couch's depths, and his cheek rested in his palm. Circles hung under his eyes, as if someone had pressed two large coins into the padded flesh. He looked mournful, like a genie forced to fetch water and vegetables when in one finger he knew he had the power to split apart the earth.   Jabril was manager of the army accounts, and son of Talal's greatest warrior, Saddaq Halabi... but Jabril could earn a nice sum, betting against the likelihood that the sultan would speak to him tonight.   Not that Jabril made bets, oh no. Saddaq had modeled for him a standard of "clean" behavior, which was rivaled in its stringency only by its self-conciousness. "Bad habits blacken the soul," he had advised his son, when warning him against 'the petty vices'.   Now approaching middle age, Jabril still occasionally wondered if there were crimes other than 'petty' that might blacken the soul...   But philosophy had always exhausted Jabril after only a few pages, so these moral inquiries never nettled him for long.   It had been twenty-five years since General Saddaq Halabi had claimed Ahsa Asmara for the sultan. That small settlement, which had by now become a small city, lay on the nearest edge of the mysterious, forbidding region known across the deserts as "The Land of the Black Sand". In Agrabah, Saddaq's victory had put his name on everybody's lips. Everyone spoke glowingly of the Halabi family and predicted a grand future for Saddaq's young son. Indeed, Jabril had experienced no trouble winning associates and constructing robust professional networks within the palace; this, even after an intractable leg injury drew his father away from public life.   Unfortunately, favor with the sultan was largely dependent on Talal's caprices, and one could not earn special privileges simply by having a famous father and performing diligent, antisocial ledger labor. As time went by, Jabril began to perceive that his trajectory had... plateaued.   He found himself nights at his accountant's desk with the tip of his reed pen mid-stroke on the ledger, as he reflected on Talal's blithe disregard for him. Jabril could not help but compare it with the bounty of Agrabah's love that had enfolded his muscular, full-bearded father, following the man's grand penetration of the Land of the Black Sand.   Slamming shut the ledger and resolutely putting away his pen, Jabril usually fled from these thoughts as he strode briskly home through the cool night, clutching at his chest as coffee-and-sweets-induced inflammation mingled with irritants of an emotional variety.   Jabril convinced himself that, in his career, he had somehow done something wrong ... somehow missed a crucial step.   But all of that was changing, tonight.   Jabril had been attempting to pass the time making formulaic small talk with the manager of land taxation, but they had now run out of topics. Jabril's colleague turned to chat up his other neighbor, and though this sort of behavior usually offended Jabril, he used the opportunity tonight to take account of the time. When he had mentally reckoned how much had passed since he'd entered the sultan's chamber, his body tautened with a thrill. This night would end extraordinarily – he knew, he'd been there in the planning stages – and its conclusion was, oh , so near.   All that was required now was a bit of patience, and Jabril was well-practiced at performing that virtue.   A small hexagonal wooden table stood at the accountant's feet, and on it, a coffee pot glinted in the candle-dimness of the hall. Jabril had a small copper demitasse, and he leant to fill it, attempting to relax by inhaling the scent of the cardamom. He decided to see how Maziyar and Adhemar Anvari - Talal's ambassadors to Ramahdiya and Iznikora, respectively - were comporting themselves in this tense game of waiting.   Across the hall, Adhemar perched on the edge of his couch in the exact attitude of a famous sculpted thinker, listening to Talal's ambassador to Agios Varvaros pronounce and gesticulate from plump recumbence. Though Adhemar was quite tall, he moved about quietly and unobtrusively, like a widow at market. His seal-brown facial hair and large, limpid brown eyes resembled those of a small, bearded dog, members of whose breed Jabril had seen in diplomatic entourages from the northeastern kingdoms.   Though a cool-tempered observer might have described Adhemar's appearance as guileless, and found it endearing, Jabril wasn't fooled.   He plays at humility quite well, doesn't he? Jabril inwardly sneered. His memories of Adhemar's past clevernesses raced towards him like a wave, breaking over him repeatedly. Jabril resented the man for his cool intelligence. He decided that the ambassador must be listening intently to a dense exposition on the state of Varvaran politics, architecture, and oh, probably mathematics too.   An objective, cool-tempered observer would find that Adhemar's face was not characterized by the proud, open mouth of the lecturer. It was not volubility by which Adhemar inspired dislike; on the contrary, he disconcerted Jabril (among several others, in fact) with his parsimony of speech, and his tendency toward spells of thick-knitted-brow-and-carpet-calligraphy-staring as his mind eagerly chased comprehension. His predilection for unceasing private analysis and his calculatedly noncommittal half-smirks convinced Jabril that there was a small kernel of evil in the diplomat: one that fed gleefully on the social blunders of other men.   The accountant had shared these thoughts many times with Adhemar's handsome, charismatic, younger brother, Maziyar, with whom Jabril had for years been developing a workable - if not exactly easy - rapport. Maziyar smiled on Jabril's musings, and the accountant believed these smiles were borne of sympathy.   At this moment, in his current attitude of pupil to the Varvaran ambassador, Adhemar's back was turned sharply on Maziyar. The younger Anvari brother sat with the posture of a king, cool in a long straight black abaya buttoning at the neck, idly tapping his armrest. Garnets glinted at his knuckles, and his imperious gaze swept the hall. Wisps of silver would inevitably begin threading themselves through Maziyar's generous black curls, but - if you cornered him on the subject - Jabril would fondly predict the ambassador would only look better , the lucky jackal.   Maziyar had accumulated many admirers over the years, and Jabril was not least among them. As adolescents in the government school, the pair had frequently shared a study table, where Jabril had made the most queries and Maziyar had offered the most suggestions.  His charm always managed to soften any condescension that slipped from his laughing eyes and sensuous lips.   By contrast, Adhemar had studied alone, and longer, which earned him the habitual coldness of the two younger men.    As Adhemar continued to nod his head during the Varvaran diplomat's monologue, Maziyar smiled knowingly. Jabril perceived that his friend was amused by Adhemar's intellectual foraging. The accountant felt comforted that he wasn't the only one who could see through the humble deceiver.   An objective, cool-tempered observer would have noticed by now that Adhemar was not actually deep in thought, but rather, was growing weary from the Varvaran diplomat's pet discourse on the preparation of yoghurt.   It has perhaps been established by now that it was precisely an objective, cool-tempered observer that Jabril was not.   The accountant leant forward on his plump elbow in order to check up on nine other men out of the twenty-five in attendance tonight. Each of said nine was around Jabril's age, provided reasonably warm company, and had recently professed loyalty to him. He knew he had Agrabah's cultural memory of Saddaq to thank for that, and he had made peace with this debt he owed to his father. Tonight, Jabril would pay it off.   The accountant looked forward to his friendships with these nine men growing much more comfortable in the coming years. He was pleased to see each appropriately wracked with nerves, like they should be, tonight , the accountant thought.  He mentally chastised Adhemar for his smooth, imperturbable front.  Some people have no sense of the seriousness of a situation .. .   As each of the nine returned scared glances to the son of Saddaq Halabi, Jabril relaxed back in the couch, satisfied.   Only about an hour more, now .   As he waited for the evening's close, when he would make the first great chess move of his life, Jabril dwelt on pleasant thoughts of the grand future his own son, Hamed, would enjoy. A Man Called Destane A week before the sultan's salon, Malakeh Anvari - that woman of high, fine features - woke from her afternoon sleep. This was a summertime ritual for all those who lived in the Seven Deserts. Across her bedroom wall, the sunlight fell, deepening through orange into scarlet. She looked to her side, and found she was alone in her bed. Maziyar had gone, and Malakeh remembered why. Her stomach sickened.   He had gone out because of her, and because of what she had suggested he do. Malakeh feared he would not come back... though she had not shared this with her husband.   Even in the summer heat, as she drew on an elegant, violet caftan, Malakeh felt very cold.   She flowed to her children's bedroom, and shook her boys, Mehrzad and Hadi, awake. She left her infant daughter, Aleia, for the maidservant to feed later. Strange how waiting for calamity is so quiet and so ordinary , she thought, bitterly.   The young servant now sat in the internal courtyard, chewing her meal, a sheen of sweat on her face. She had thrown open the blue, wooden shutters of Maziyar's house, allowing the smell of cooking to waft in from other houses. She had set the Anvari's low, sandalwood table with a large bronze platter of saffron rice, grilled lamb, and vegetables.   Malakeh knelt wordlessly with her sons around the maid's handiwork. She looked at the boys: her eldest, clever Mehrzad, at six, and little Hadi, at four, so eager to please. Maziyar's sons; his heirs, meant to grow up in his image, with his guidance. Malakeh was putting it all on the line... everything she and her husband were working for. It was a risk they had to take... she just hoped it was worth it.   "Is Dad already working again?" Mehrzad inquired, his face falling. "I know two verses of the poem now. I wanted to do it for him..."   Malakeh looked at her son, and over her eyes, whose shape a jeweler could have cut, was cast a cloud of concern.   "Perhaps tomorrow, Mehrzad... if tomorrow comes. Just eat now."   The boy looked at her oddly, before starting into his meal.   Meanwhile, the marketplace was just starting to fill up again. The luxurious, post-sleep calm hung about like a blanket around the shoulders. There was only a trickle of merchant chatter in the usually hive-like marketplace. Three hooded figures secreted through twisting streets, past green displays of fruit, colorful folded fabrics, and profusions of bronze lanterns with jewel-red and -green glass panes.   Merchants ignored the figures – one heavy one in white, two slimmer ones in dark gray – once it was clear they weren't shopping. The figures passed the coffeehouse, with its large fir wood lattice window, and the inviting smell of a fresh brew drifting through the arched doorway. Shops became fewer and fewer as they walked, before they found their junction.   Just before the three turned into a little alley, where sand piled up in the cracks and corners, they passed a lean man relaxing in a carved chair in the shade of an awning. The man was in his 40's, with wiry, pepper-and-salt stubble. He watched the sun slide by, and listened to younger merchants laughing and talking and agonizing about things that didn't matter. In the dark of his shop behind him, stout clay pots full of plants and powders lined the walls, and clusters of roots and bulbs hung from the ceiling. Sometimes, male clients joined him in a back room, where the man took out a collection of smooth, brightly hued stones, and arranged them in inscrutable patterns over the client's bare chest, while cedar wood burned in a small bowl.   The man noted the mysterious threesome: how they slunk by, keeping their features vague, and how they turned the corner with clearly only one destination in mind.   The man sighed, and got out of his chair to see how his neighbor received the three men.   Before a pale, sand-blasted wooden door in a sagging structure of pocked plaster, the three appeared to debate among themselves – perhaps about the merit of their pursuit , the older man thought – before one of the men in gray stepped forward, raised a hand glinting with garnet rings, and rapped on the door. An insolent silence followed his entreaty. Irritated, the man in gray brought his knuckles to the wood once again and rapped harder. Still, no one answered him.   The shopkeeper chose to speak up, suggesting they try the public house. The three turned sharply, studying him with narrowed gaze, but he merely shrugged and said, "He often goes there," before returning to his chair, thinking he would let them get on with the inevitable. The three swept by without sparing him a glance, and the old man wondered, with rapidly waning interest, how his disreputable neighbor would toy with the foolish three.   There was a public house a short walk hence. The man with the rings led them down a narrow, dusty stone stairwell, the temperature dropping perceptibly as they went. He pulled aside a curtain, revealing a dim, womb-like haunt. A few brass lamps glowed above a man preparing concoctions. The odor offended the heavy man's abstinent sensibilities, ground into him by force of pious, manly father. From a sea of narrow, octagonal wood tables winked the light of candles, making silhouettes of their hunched, shady occupants.   With a little thrill, the heavy man marveled that this was what dissipation looked like. Lone men nursed drinks and scads of friends chatted, while one pair played chess with goblets placed nearby. The noise was all enveloping. The second man in gray whispered, from under a large brown moustache, to his companions: "This is suitably private."   They wound their way through the morass, scanning faces, until the man with rings suddenly drew their attention to a single figure in a cobwebbed corner, who brooded over his own cup, beyond the flicker of a single oil lamp.   "That's him?" Jabril scoffed under his breath.   "Oh, surely not," Adhemar murmured. "He's dreadfully young for his reputation."   Maziyar was already striding towards the man's table.   The man at the table was perhaps in his late twenties, was lean, and had a short bob of black hair slightly wild from years of running hands through it. He clasped a goblet, intensely studying its embossed patterns. His brown eyes were sharp and angular. His V-shaped jaw, and the pained, wry smirk cleaving it might have been cut from glass. Maziyar put his hands in front of him, pressing his fingertips into the tabletop. The young man slowly lifted his head, and any irritation he might have expressed, dissembled into livid shock as soon as he saw Maziyar's face.   The young man looked away quickly, gathering his thoughts. A smile curled the corners of his mouth.   Jabril was confused. Adhemar was disturbed. He took hold of his younger brother's arm, but Maziyar jerked it free. He wouldn't be derailed from his task. He began the way he had planned to: "You are the magician known as... 'Destane', correct?"   "Yes, yes, I am ," the smug young man answered, in a daze of happiness. "And how may I help you? "   Maziyar paused. "I'm sorry," he said. "Do you know me? Because I don't know you."   "No, of course you wouldn't," replied Destane, laughing softly at some private joke. By way of explanation, he added, quickly, "But a sorceror must travel, and be acquainted with different cultures. I've read some of your writings on Ramadiya,... and, yes, yes, it was you who I believe I saw in the archive one day."   "Ah," commented Maziyar, still a bit confused, but unmistakably flattered.   Adhemar still watched Destane carefully, searching for conclusive evidence of dishonesty.   " I would like proof that you are who you say you are," Jabril interrupted.   "You would , would you?" Destane inquired, accepting the challenge. With a flourish, he reached for the oil lamp, his right hand suddenly gloved. He grinned manically at the three, and pressed his finger to the lamp's bumpy metal surface.   The small flame leaped monstrously into a large undulating blade of white light, edges glowing blue. Maziyar and his company shied away from the sudden wave of heat. Smirking, Destane removed his finger. The flame extinguished, then reignited once again at an ordinary size. Destane repossessed his goblet, the glove blinking out of existence as he did so. The three government men were speechless.   Adhemar noted a thin odor, reminiscent of a humid reptile house. He observed that this was not the smell of burning lamp oil. On his travels far from Agrabah in service as Talal's ambassador, he had heard stories told of magic and its practitioners, but no one had ever hinted that you could smell magic! Despite himself, Adhemar was fascinated. He wondered if all sorcerors were forced to work enveloped by such a fetid stench, or if this was only intrinsic to Destane's magic? Unfortunately, the sorceror cut short Adhemar's excited reverie.   "Now," said Destane, all business. He took a swig from his goblet. "Have a seat."   Admiration evident on his face, Jabril seated himself, and Maziyar followed, looking quite pleased. At last deciding to humor Destane, Adhemar elegantly folded himself into the third seat.   Destane began: "Why have you come to me, today?"   Maziyar half-turned, and murmured to Adhemar and Jabril, "He'd do nicely . Don't you think?"   "Yes, I probably would," Destane responded impatiently, before either Adhemar or Jabril could comment. "What is it you want?"   Jabril issued him a further challenge. "We serve the sultan, and we'd like to change that arrangement," he said, his crescent-moon eyebrows climbing high on his forehead.   Destane's face split in a cunning smile.   "You've come to the right place," he said. His voice crept smoothly, like a cat, rising to preen coyly. "Not only do I have the capabilities you seek, I also couldn't care less who has the throne of Agrabah. So I will gladly help you reorder things. With whom do you intend to replace Talal Sayegh?"   Maziyar dropped one beringed hand on Jabril's ample shoulder, while he placed the other over his heart (privately, Adhemar found this gesture a mite too theatrical, but sufficient). Maziyar inclined his head, and pronounced, "Our dear friend, Jabril ibn Saddaq Halabi, son of the great war hero who conquered the Land of the Black Sand."   Jabril smiled with pleasure, before Destane scoffed. The heavy man's round eyes bulged, before narrowing dangerously.   Destane laughed until he saw Jabril's expression, then began waving his hands like white flags. "Oh-, no- " he managed, gasping with laughter. "I meant no disrespect; I'm sure you're quite worthy ."   Jabril was not comforted.   "What I find amusing," the sorcerer clarified, waving a trembling index finger, "is your characterization of the Land of the Black Sand as 'conquered'. Yes, Ahsa Asmara answers only to Agrabah, but one outpost on the edge of that region does not qualify as mastery over the strange, wonderful creatures and alien peoples that I'm sure must live there."   The sorcerer's index finger folded, and for a moment, he was transported. Then he shook his head in disappointment, spitting: " So like a bureaucrat to exaggerate for his master, and peddle lies unquestioningly."   A muscle twitched in Maziyar's cheek. He'd just been getting to like this young man... Adhemar rolled his eyes, and laid a hand on his brother's arm. Maziyar reluctantly stilled.   Adhemar smoothed over Destane's jab with, "Well, perhaps when your initial work for us is done, we will contract your services as an official ethnographer for the new regime…" He turned to Jabril and added, "…with the sultan's blessing, of course."   "Mmmm, yes… that reminds me," Destane began, drumming his fingers on the table. "What were you planning on offering me for making Jabril the sultan?"   Maziyar started, and again, Adhemar touched his arm. Maziyar's coffee-black eyes flashed resentfully at his older brother. Adhemar only nodded in the direction of Jabril. "The sultan himself should be the font of beneficence," he advised. "What do you suggest, Jabril?"   Jabril, not yet the master of great wealth and unused to giving out large, extravagant gifts, realized uncomfortably that he had no inkling of the wide world of property, treasure, or eligible women that he might give to pacify Destane.   "Why don't you make the opening bid?" he asked the sorcerer, attempting to disguise the uncertainty in his voice.   The magician shut his eyes, smiling beatifically. He savored the moment, before launching into his petition, and it seemed as though he'd been waiting years to make it.   "In Ahsa Asmara, I would like a secluded, well-appointed retreat where I may live in comfort and do my research. I know exactly where such a property may be found, but the problem is... it's already occupied. Perhaps after you claim the sultanate, you can 'change that arrangement' for me? "   Maziyar affirmed, "Simple enough," and Adhemar just looked at him. Adhemar amended it with, "If you wish it, Jabril, my brother and I will work out a deal with the current tenants of this property of which the sorceror speaks. They will surely appreciate our obligation to reward Destane exceptionally."   Jabril nodded, feeling secure in the competence of the brothers Anvari, and marveling at how non-perverse the gift seemed. Aside from indulgence in alcohol, Destane seemed unexpectedly free of the petty vices. Out of curiosity, Jabril prodded, "You don't desire a large sum in gold and jewels? Are there no women you fancy?"   Adhemar said nothing, but looked away, annoyed that Jabril was offering more. But the sorcerer merely shook his head, and took a swig from his goblet.   "I won't need gold. With any servants I hire, I plan to use a different bargaining chip."   The three stared at him.   Destane feigned affront, his hand flying to his heart. "You three are filthy . Nothing so sordid as that ."   "And women?" Jabril prompted, eager to corner the magician.   A strange bitterness infused Destane's face. He drank deeply, and for some reason, shot a distasteful look at Maziyar.   Destane's voice was flat, and grim. "My life experience has taught me that the helpless, indolent women you might proffer me tend to leave a bad taste in my mouth..."   Smiling impishly at Jabril, he added, "...and I do mean that literally."   Jabril made a scandalized sound. Adhemar looked away, blushing, and Maziyar gave Destane a pained look (though he privately wondered if Malakeh might be amenable to certain things).   "Well, I suppose now we know what sort of man you are, Destane," Jabril concluded smugly.   "Right," Maziyar sternly interjected, shifting uncomfortably in his seat (Adhemar rolled his eyes). "Back to business, if you please . Now, in a week, the sultan will be holding audience in his summer reception hall. We can arrange your presence as entertainment; no one will question this. While your reputation is dubious in some neighborhoods, most men groomed from youth for government work will not have heard the rumors."   "That's correct. You've certainly done your homework! You must have had quite a good source..." Destane teased.   Adhemar interrupted with something he felt was important: "What exactly do you intend to do with Talal and his men?"   "I will rid you of any men you specify," Destane answered easily.   "Yes, but in what manner?"   "Don't tell me you don't want to be surprised?" the magician wheedled.   Adhemar gave him a severe look.   "Oh, fine . I've got a special way of offing people that might not disturb your stomach. It renders the victim dormant, though not quite dead. I'll offer you a choice: either I can immediately refashion the victims' memories according to your specifications, allowing you to literally reorder the hierarchy, with none of your victims the wiser, or - if you wish it - I can waste no more time and dispose of them permanently."   Adhemar raised his eyebrows, finding this proposition quite reasonable, and feeling relieved that they could approach this in a non-violent manner. He opened his mouth to exclaim, happily, that the choice was simple, when Maziyar touched his arm.   Bewildered, Adhemar looked at his brother, who gazed on him smugly, his black eyes glittering with mirth. Adhemar knew his brother was being petty, but he was more annoyed that in an instance when Maziyar agreeably practiced deference to Jabril, the balance was swinging between civilized and warlike behavior.   He turned from his brother in disgust, and murmured to Jabril, "I'm sure you'll make the right choice."   Jabril swallowed nervously, as such an enormous responsibility lowered onto his shoulders. He nodded, and declared that he would state his choice in a week, after Destane had incapacitated Talal's court.   Suddenly, though, he found himself perplexed.  He narrowed his eyes at Destane.    "Wait a minute... if you have this power to remove those who block your ambitions, then why haven't you taken this 'citadel' in Ahsa Asmara already?"   Destane smiled proudly.  "Ah, you're more intelligent than you look, I see... Well, Ahsa Asmara is... protected ... from marauders and magicians by a very unique device..."   Adhemar nodded, as in the past he happened to have informed himself about the city, in lieu of traveling to it.  "Explicit permission from the governor is requisite for entry."   "That's right," Destane agreed.  "Those who attempt to enter without such permission are never successful.  Moreover, they are punished... severely ."   Jabril tilted his crescent moon brows higher, in disbelief.  " No one is successful?  Not even you , with all your power?"    Destane shook his head.  " Especially not me, with all my power."   Jabril folded his plump arms, and leaned back in his chair, satisfied.  "You truly need us, then."   Destane, shut his eyes, repressing the urge to hurl a barbed retort, and ground out: "That I do."   The three government men rose from the table.    "Serve us faithfully, and we will get you what you desire," Jabril assured the sorcerer.    With that, he joined his companions as they ascended to the nighttime street to return to their families. Destane's Entertainment (Part 1)  As Talal's discussion evening wore on, the sultan visibly wearied. His thoughts drifted, and his smiles grew more forced. After allowing his current conversation partner to say his piece, he cleared away in that moment as many as possible of the man's concerns, and bade his scribe take notes on the rest. Then he signaled two guards to herd out the lesser privileged of his associates.   Talal noted with mild curiosity that the two men were not the usual guards employed for this duty… but he brushed it off, assuming illness.   The guards ushered out precisely twelve men, including Jabril, Maziyar, and Adhemar. After carefully shutting and locking the double doors, the guards looked to Maziyar for guidance. Maziyar merely nodded, and they took up their posts guarding the doors from the outside.  Jabril, Maziyar, and Adhemar led their nine co-conspirators around to access the loggia.       Through the arches, the full moon in starry blue firmament threw a long line of pure white half-discs along the floor, complemented by treacherously deep shadow. Through the dark, the men crept along silently, until they could peer into the room they had just exited.  There, they could see Destane standing in the middle of the large rug, bowing before the distinguished company.   Under the dim glow of chandeliers, his features were handsome, darkly sketched as under an artist's hand. He had assembled the grandest costume he could muster.  In a blue, utilitarian tunic, with his black trousers tucked into the tops of his curled brown boots, he already appeared competent and agile; but now he had acquired a fitted black satin blouse to wear under the tunic. He gestured widely, like a master of ceremonies, and the folds shimmered fantastically. Upping the ante, he'd giddily tied a wine-red sash about his waist and grabbed a big burgundy cape from his magician's closet. He made himself regal by donning a dark blue turban adorned with a garnet and black ostrich feather. All conspirators were breathless with admiration.      Destane's leather glove was again on his arm; somewhat marring the effect, but Destane never fully sacrificed function for fashion. Though their co-conspirators held no presumptions about the gauntlet, having not seen what Destane could do with it, Maziyar and Adhemar kept their eyes pinned to Destane's weapon.      "Your honorable selves! Great Sultan and assembled men," Destane began. "A panoply of visions awaits you! I call myself Destane, and I can see farther and deeper, and I can spin whimsies more fantastical, than any amateur magician you have likely encountered before."      The Varvaran ambassador, who had been allowed to stay in honor of his close friendship with Talal, scoffed, "Prove it!"      Destane's angular eyes narrowed as he sensed yet another dig from an aging, landed gentleman at his supposed inexperience. He would enjoy delivering them their fate a great deal more now. He took a steadying breath, and began to support his boast.        He inquired casually, "Well, I suppose then this means you have already seen the likes of… fire-breathers?"     He turned over his gauntleted right hand and suddenly appeared to palm a stone-gray oil lamp.     This began to earn him the men's attention, and he saw many grimaces as he brought the long spout to his lips. From his hiding place in the shadows of the loggia, Jabril sickened to see the sorcerer's Adam's apple bob as the liquid poured down his throat. Destane grinned at his official spectators, and wiped his lips with the back of his bare hand, before opening his mouth wide and expelling a roaring flame that raced around the hall and traced calligraphic patterns among the bronze chandeliers. The long fiery curves twined and intertwined and unwound and eventually streamed back to Destane, who swallowed it all in one big gulp.        Absurdly, he then requested a drink of water. His joke was well received, and Talal's grand vizier gladly raised his cup in offering. He gasped as the goblet slipped of its own accord from his grasp and hurtled across the hall. Destane caught it by the stem and drank, to great applause. Over the rim, he stole a glance at the Varvaran ambassador, who, he was gratified to see, sat with arms folded, watching the sorcerer with interest.        Next, he removed the cape from his shoulders and folded it neatly, depositing it on a tea table. His hands went to his waist, and he began unwinding… two sashes?     "I presume that you frequently receive visitors from the Far East," he said to the room. "So, you mustn't be ignorant of their magnificent, pearl-hunting leviathans."        A murmur – first of confusion, then of dawning comprehension and electric anticipation – swept across the room.      Adhemar thrilled at what Destane had hinted, and he squinted at the sorcerer's hands to watch the details.     Garnet-colored sashes extending from his arms like extraordinarily long sleeves, Destane turned smoothly, trailing the sashes and wheeling them in huge loops, affecting an unmistakable dance typically performed by women.      When his hips appeared to sway, there were nervous, unkind titters among his official spectators and doubtful looks exchanged among the conspirators. Maziyar smirked when Jabril averted his eyes, and it is unclear whether or not Adhemar noticed (though he might have blushed if he had). Destane ignored them all.      In his gloved hand, the shimmering fabric thickened and began forming into a long scaly tube. A face with the geniality of a dog formed out of the end. As he completed the transfiguration, Destane held the second sash limp and allowed the creature to grab it with his teeth, which catalyzed the second sash's transformation. Two long, snake-like ruby dragons squirmed free of Destane's grasp, inadvertently swatting him away.        Destane picked up a pair of copper teacups and enclosed them, one after the other, in his gloved palm. Unfolding his fingers, he revealed two pearls the same size as the cups. They glowed with a faint turquoise aura, as he placed an additional enchantment on them. Then Destane tossed the pearls.      In the dim chamber, the pearls hung in midair, catching the golden glow from the lamps overhead. The dragons suddenly ceased chasing each other's tail, and in large undulating S-curves, rippled through the air after the will o' the wisps. Destane's audience gasped with pleasure as they craned their necks to watch candle-glow on glistening red scales and magical pearls. Then, just as the dragons were about to chomp down on their quarries, each pearl split four ways, and each of those split two ways, into 16 firefly pearls!         Each dragon whirled about wildly, imminent success having been neatly snatched away. As if to huddle and strategize, the creatures flowed close to one another and appeared to intertwine, before it was clear that each smoothly redistributed its anatomy into four smaller dragons the size of bonsai trees, each of which then redistributed into two dragons small enough to curl up on the rim of a coffee cup. The hall was a flurry of red fairies clamoring for the spiraling gold pearls.        When he'd had enough of the chaos, Destane snapped his gauntleted fingers, and the pearls froze in midair, before dropping into goblets and teacups. Predictably, the dragons dived after them, and there was a chorus of electric sizzles, followed by wisps of steam rising from the vessels. Several men leant over tentatively to inspect the drinks, and they saw the liquid, originally with an aspect of either amber or hematite, turn a lurid turquoise.           Destane urged them to drink, and took a few swigs to encourage them.         Some men, including the Varvaran ambassador, muttered about the unnatural color. Another whispered, "Nothing edible looks like that." However, some were rather more swayed by a childlike curiosity, and drank. The grand vizier – seated by Talal – compared notes with him. The vizier felt it tasted mostly of licorice and fennel, while Talal – seeing that his advisor drank the liquid and was not harmed – took a few sips and identified a spicy orange.         Destane continued his boast. "Now, if all of this is old hat, then maybe you have also seen that most wondrous of wonders, a magic carpet?" Destane's Entertainment (Part 2) For this, the sorcerer retrieved his velvet cape from the tea table.  He rolled it into a tube between his fingers. A moment passed, and Destane snapped it open, unfurling a vision of wine-red fantastically embroidered with black and gold thread. He cocked an eyebrow at the sultan, and extended his bare hand in invitation.   Talal and his vizier exchanged significant looks. The sultan quietly self-deprecated about his age.  The vizier laid a reassuring hand on Talal's arm, before rising to step forward in his place.   Seeing this, Destane shrugged. "Have it your way, then. Shame to miss out."   The grand vizier, with a dark gray pointed beard and simple black caftan, was ten years younger than Talal and significantly more spry. He lowered himself into a sitting position on the carpet Destane had laid out. The sorcerer bent and trailed gauntleted fingers along the edge of the carpet.  The vizier could not keep himself from grinning, as the surface beneath him slowly undulated and lifted a foot off the ground.   Destane turned his right wrist, and in doing so, he cloaked from view the men in the loggia.  Then he looked down on the carpet, miming its undulation with his gloved fingers. The vizier on his magical transport sailed off through the arches, past shadowy conspirators, over the darkened gardens, and he soon was flying over a sea of lamplights.   The squat, domed government school and the towers of the university and observatory glittered with the lights of late-night adherents. They stood taller than the myriad houses of people and houses of commerce, like rocks sticking up out of the ocean. The river resembled a floating island of thick, dark ocean weed. Some few lights blinked from boats drifting along, like strange creatures from the deep, with a glow embedded in their skins. The steep hills around Agrabah seemed like distant shores, enticing the explorer to see if the mystery of those still, grand, moon-washed dunes beyond was intriguing enough to risk encountering snakes, marauders, or the elemental power of sandstorms.   The breeze whipped through the vizier's hair, and whisked away his striped turban.  He decided not to care; he felt like a child again. He stretched out on his stomach and folded his arms over the edge of the carpet. He gazed down upon his city appreciatively, thinking about how long he had served and how long he had gone without ever seeing it like this. He thought it extraordinary that an ordinary man such as himself could watch from above, like a free, incorporeal spirit. What a rare, unexpected gift this was!   He thought vaguely that he must give Talal a somewhat tempered report, so as not to disappoint him for missing out. But the vizier felt annoyed that such a disappointing, practical notion should occur to him in the midst of an experience gifted him by a man who seemed to wield the powers of heaven. It further occurred to him that one ought to be disturbed by the fact that a mere man should hold such godlike power.   But the vizier wished to shake the mantle of complicated adulthood a little while longer, so he stilled his thoughts and savored the spicy, gold-dusted, violet night. The carpet serenely glided back into the sultan's gallery, and the vizier stood and took the sorcerer's uncovered hand as he stepped to the ground. He was smiling as he returned to sit next to Talal, and the others applauded his bravery.   Destane pinched a corner of the carpet with his gauntleted hand, and the embroidery rapidly unraveled and flowed in long striations of black and gold into that one corner, and back into his fingertips. The carpet fell limp, a velvet cape once more, and Destane reaffixed it to his shoulders. "Privileged gentlemen," he began, looking like the cat that ate the canary. "I may seem insultingly young, but perhaps, after all, I have shown you a few secrets you hadn't bargained for?"   He shot a venomous look at the Varvaran ambassador, who gave a wry, good-natured smile, and raised a hand in capitulation. "The best part… is that you have not even seen the best I have to offer," the sorcerer tempted.   Destane gestured at a silver platter bearing some scraps of bulgur mixed with mint leaves and tahini on a tea table by Talal's feet, and inquired, "Are you done with that?"   Talal himself, it seemed, did not care to draw the sorcerer's attention, and responded by gesturing pathetically at the food still on the plate, at a loss for how to correct it for the sorcerer. "No worries," Destane assured him, and extended his gauntleted hand.   The platter floated over to him, and he swirled his hand over it, the debris vanishing. He took it in both hands, and held it in front of him. The audience could see themselves as shadows reflected dimly in it. Destane then uttered a stream of incomprehensible words at the mirror, before its surface clouded and seemed to ripple, like the surface of a lake. The sorcerer allowed the mirror to expand in his grasp, and he caused it to float upwards so that all men could see clearly what emerged from within.   He boasted, "Any magician can show you wonders, drops of exotica from lands far away…. Almost none of them can show you these worlds as they actually are. But I can..."   The surface of the mirror turned deep blue and began to glow with an aqueous light. In it, only leagues of empty blue could be seen. Then suddenly, the dim outline of an impossibly large mammal could be seen through the deep. It passed slowly and smoothly, and reactions ranged from unnerved to fascinated. In particular, the mathematician, philosopher, grand vizier, as well as the concealed Adhemar, stared in awe.   The huge, graceful shape floated past the frame, and the image in the mirror imperceptibly changed into another expanse of water, surrounding a mountain of coral, orbited by a plethora of fish, as vibrant and multi-hued as the contents of a treasure chest. In the sea soil were embedded large hunks of stone, carved in the likeness of gods and pharaohs, lost and abandoned for thousands of years.  The sight humbled all men present.   All in the audience suddenly gasped when the very familiar face of a flesh-and-blood woman appeared.  Shaded by palm leaves, she wore a tall blue helmet, and she lifting her beautiful chin proudly.  Her eyes smoked with the kohl drawn to giver her eyes of Ra, and her lips were red and full.   The philosopher and mathematician muttered in disbelief, "But she's been dead for thousands of years…."   The humorist was amused and amazed by what he saw in the mirror, but found himself amused equally by watching his fellow spectators.   Several other men refused to believe their eyes.  As they watched, the woman did not stand in the stiff, painted profile by which they knew her; she continued, insolently, to blink her large eyes, to quirk her lips coyly, jealously, at her gaunt husband, who had appeared opposite her.  His head was shaven, his chest bare, and he ate bits of fruit and meat, while she was deprived the pleasure by an assistant who currently painted her.    The woman was most definitely alive, and several men in the audience made a low din of furiously whispered debate. Had the sorcerer truly brought a dead woman to life? Or was he merely showing a cunning representation of her? It all looked so real through the mirror… a few men, including Talal, decided to forego skepticism and simply enjoy the woman's charms.   "That's right, Excellencies," Destane said. "Not only can I show you deep in the oceans, where no man has been able to tread, but I can also show you things that have happened long ago, as well as things that have yet to occur."   The vision of Nefertiti dissolved and coalesced into visions of pale-skinned, yellow- and brown-haired men, who wore metal armor of a style as yet unseen on their neighbors in the far West. The men were striding and preening and pronouncing before groups of subdued characters, whom seemed neither to comprehend the strangers, nor take them very seriously. They wore colorful fabric, feathers in their long dark hair, and they resembled the people from high northern plains who wore thick coats and lived in yurts, except in one respect: many had flattened their foreheads to an absurd degree. Some of the men in the sultan's hall chuckled, while others began to suggest among themselves that the sorcerer was simply making up fancies.   In the mirror there appeared several shimmering bands of colored air in a far northern clime, and then the mirror saw only starry black firmament. As the men watched, a blue-and-white marble, streaked with green, rolled into view. It hung in the sparkling velvet black, and the men were transfixed… and at a loss. It was a sight they had neither seen, nor ever imagined. The sultan spoke up on behalf of all assembled: "What is this lovely bauble in the night sky, sorcerer?"   Destane was silent, and appeared not to know.   And then he did a curious thing.   He shut his eyes tight as if to withdraw something from his memory.   His eyeballs darted to and fro beneath the lids. When his eyes fluttered open, he replied in a sort of daze, as though even he struggled to believe what was coming out of his mouth: "It... is our home , great one. All of existence: land, water, animals, and people."   As the marble revolved within the scope of the mirror, he made a gesture at a particular brown patch, and said, "Here is where we are; we're so tiny you can't even see us."   He looked back at his silent audience, some of whom had by now begun to think Destane was losing his mind. No longer a humorous, charismatic entertainer, he was now either truly insane or playing at insanity in a twisted game. Several held burning questions.   "How?" asked the vizier.   "He's a charlatan," the mathematician snarled dismissively, thinking that settled everything.   "The most compelling explanation… is trickery," admitted the philosopher.   The Varvaran ambassador leant on his elbow, his cheek in his palm, his eyebrow cocked expectantly, as he gazed at Destane. The sorcerer felt familiar prickles of resentment, but he forced himself to remain calm. He gave a full-body shrug, and countered, "I don't invent these visions… they are simply... given to me."   "And who gives them to you?" continued the vizier.   Destane smiled. "The first rule is never to share secrets of the trade, especially not with non-initiates."   In the amused tone of a rich, powerful man who steadfastly won't be disturbed by anything these young upstarts may throw at him, the Varvaran ambassador sneered, "How convenient."   Destane sighed heavily, and hung his head.  These distinguished men in fine robes on couches might aspire to be pleasant and amicable with him, even playful and open-minded, but Destane saw that could extend their good will only so far.  In the end, as usual, he was the recipient of disbelief, confusion, and scorn.   "Gentlemen," he began.   The lightheartedness had left him.   "It has been… illuminating… to share secrets and wonders with you tonight. Such powerful men… yet you have seen so little. It's rather strange. Well, perhaps some day, each of you will have the opportunity to remedy this. Yes, I think you might all have the chance to travel the world… carried on the desert winds."   Destane's Entertainment (Part 3)  Some men frowned at Destane's strange phrasing, but no one had any time to anticipate what came next.   The sorcerer tugged a small pouch from within his tunic, and pinched out a bit of gray sand. Clenching it within his gauntleted hand, he magically empowered it in an aquamarine glow, and blew it across his palm. Enchanted grains swirled about Talal for a moment, before he coughed, and promptly disintegrated in a fleshy mound of sand, rapidly turning gray.   The mathematician, humorist, and some of the younger, spryer men scattered, leaping for the loggia or for the doors.   Destane turned his wrist, allowing the concealment spell to fall from his co-conspirators, and they restrained those very surprised men who tried to escape through the loggia. The sorceror demolished them with ease.   Those who pounded against the locked double doors dissolved amid helpless cries as Destane picked them off, one by one.   The sorcerer made quick work of the older, less mobile men – the philosopher seemed to receive his demise with vague curiosity. The Varvaran ambassador, being old and rotund, sat in resolute disbelief before Destane transfigured him.   The vizier scrambled, eyes widening as several alarming thoughts collided in his head like a line of dominoes. Miraculous, fabulous Destane… was really just a common assassin. His unholy power that could take the vizier soaring could also reduce him a to a dead substance lower than all animals. How this evening he had risen so high and would sink so low, beyond redemption, if he didn't run fast enough. He lunged for the door, farther than his legs could carry him, and lost his balance, hitting the floor as a messy spray of gray grains.   The sorcerer stood amid deafening silence in a large, dusty hall, brushing grains off his clothes. Thirteen piles of sand lay strewn across the marble floor, gritting up the carpet and couch cushions. Sand grains mixed with bulgur on platters, and silted the cups of turquoise once-coffee and once-tea. It looked like a tropical archipelago in each teacup and goblet.   Destane panted with exertion, and his co-conspirators reeled from the wave of reptile stench. As his breathing slowed to normal, Destane waved his hand and conjured a huge brass hourglass, the size of a clerk's desk.  He carefully lowered it onto its side, the way a father would lay a small child to sleep. Then he unscrewed the brass top and magically incised the top bulb around its diameter, removing the hemispherical glass cap.   With a directive gauntleted finger, he indicated for all of the sand to slide along the floor and over couches and carpet into the open glass bulb, like sending so many naughty dogs to the kennel.   When it was done, he replaced the glass cap, mending the incision under the aquamarine glow of his gauntlet, and screwed the brass cap back on.   Finally, he shrank the hourglass and fitted it with a leather cord, proffering it to Jabril to wear as a pendant. Jabril took the hourglass and studied it. He looked pleased.   "Have you made your choice, my sultan?" Destane inquired.   Jabril smiled at the address. He replied, "Get rid of them."   The sorcerer arched his brow, as if he did not expect this from the stout man shyly testing his newfound powers. A few men exchanged significant, shocked looks, as if they hadn't expected to co-sign on such a harsh punishment (though some appeared unsurprised). Maziyar looked thrilled by this new, strong Jabril, while Adhemar was paralyzed with shock.   "But… my liege… why? " he finally managed.   Maziyar rolled his eyes. Jabril's round brown eyes deadened as he looked at Adhemar.   "Every powerful sultanate begins with a strong first act, sweeping away the vestiges of the past," Jabril explained. "To legitimize myself and our regime, I'm convinced we must eliminate Talal and choice members of his court in a straight-forward, aggressive, honest manner… not in this vindictive, snake-hearted way that you obviously advocate. After all, we are men on the battlefield with axes in hand, not women in the kitchen with poison vials. Our legitimacy in the eyes of our people, our allies, and our enemies, depends on our willingness to plunge in the knife."   "But Destane could probably enchant innumerable people… as many as we need!" Adhemar protested, forgetting his well-practiced deference to his new sultan.   Jabril, still in the process of coalescing an arrogance and sense of entitlement befitting his new station, responded coolly, without anger: "My regime won't be built upon a messy, unsustainable lie."   Adhemar exhaled in defeat and hung his head. Maziyar watched him from beneath his lashes, waiting to see how his brother would retort. Adhemar swallowed, and when he looked up, his eyes had cooled.   He was ready to let his officially sanctioned subordination to Jabril carry the weight of moral responsibility for what happened next.   "Well, then, must we do away with Kouri and Bishara?" he said, referring to the mathematician and philosopher. "Their loss would be a shameful waste to the empire."   Jabril waved his hand dismissively. "There will be other intellectuals to tickle you with their treatises, Adhemar," he condescended, and some other men chuckled amongst themselves. Adhemar held a stiff upper lip.   Destane extended a gauntleted hand for the hourglass, and grinned. "If that is your choice, then I will deal with this, and send Talal's regime sailing off on a world tour."   "Commensurate with my new post, I believe I should be present when you do that," Jabril stated, not appearing quite as commanding as his phrasing when he met the sorcerer's eyes.   "You do , do you?" Destane joked.   Jabril's eyes flashed angrily, but he said nothing, and Destane decided to capitulate, since that reaction had been sufficiently boring.   Adhemar laid a hand on his brother's arm and whispered harshly, "Even you must realize we have to do something about the families."   Maziyar regarded him thoughtfully, without scorn, and Adhemar indicated Jabril and Destane. He hissed, " Tell them…" between his teeth.   Maziyar stepped forward, hands folded behind his back. He was a long, dutiful pillar of black. "Perhaps we should deal with the immediate kin of the deceased before you commit them to the ether?"   Jabril looked at his new grand vizier and was thoughtful. "Their sons might pose a threat…" he mused.   "Not all of their sons remain in Agrabah," one man noted.   "But most do," put in another.   "We'll deal with them all in due time," Jabril decided. "Tonight, Maziyar, you and I will direct Destane through the families. The rest of you have my gratitude and are dismissed to cloister your own families tonight. You are free to relieve yourselves of this oppressive stench."   "At last ," muttered one man.   "Miraculousness notwithstanding," another commented. "I would never willingly exercise such power it if this rankness is the price."   "Gentlemen," Destane cried in mock innocence. "Surely you have all had that experience of forgetting your own body odor?"   Several men turned in disgust and vacated the hall through the double doors. A few rallied around one who cleverly countered, "But it wasn't there when you performed for Talal and his men?"   With his nose in the air, Destane responded, "I'm a professional. I can mask it when it seems appropriate."   The inquisitor gave him a funny look before leaving the hall with the rest of his company. Smirking, Destane exited via the loggia in a sweep of blood red cape, Jabril following in his wake.   Left alone, Maziyar faced his brother. He gave Adhemar a severe look for effectively shunting the dirty work onto him, but Adhemar only waved his brother away. "Go," he told Maziyar, and noted bitterly, "First act as Grand Vizier!"   Sourly, Maziyar went off in the direction Destane and Jabril had gone.   Adhemar, clutching the bisht tightly around him so his hands wouldn't shake, swept off in a dark frenzy.   Destane's Entertainment (Part 4)  Outside the palace wall, the torches guttered. It was nearly midnight, and Adhemar hurried along the causeway. He hoped his wife, Sümeyra, would be asleep by now, so he wouldn't have to endure her being beautiful, good, and wifely.   She would be intolerably open, as she always was, always yielding without question to his greedy arms. She would read him like a book in her native Iznikoran, rather than in the language of Agrabah with which she had struggled when he brought her here. She would draw out the thorn in his side before he was able to convincingly pretend it wasn't there. Then he would have to explain how he acquired it…   Adhemar wanted to collapse in the sheets in his lightless room and forget himself.   The street where he lived was a chasm of deep night, lightened only by the moon, and empty of people. Adhemar shuffled quickly to the two-story structure he shared with his wife and two children, and turned the key in the lock. He leant in, easing open the wooden door, and through the gloom he heard the baby's mewling.   Adhemar winced and inwardly cursed. Shutting the door as quietly as he could, he crept across the flagstone floor and fled into his study.   In the hot shadows of the bedroom, Sümeyra suffered under sweat-dampened sheets and under her curtains of curly dark hair. She cradled a little head in her shoulder, but the baby only cried and fussed. Sümeyra had tried to get him to feed, but he only buried his face in her arm. She'd sung some low strains, but he might as well have not heard her.   This was not Sümeyra's first child, and she was becoming annoyed that her son did not deem her efforts sufficient. A headache began to pulse in her temples, and she thought she heard her husband escape into his study before she could summon him for help. Not that she should need to, she thought; this was her job, after all.   Still, she wanted to sleep, and her son was making this impossible.   There was a soft padding of tiny feet on the stone floor, and Sümeyra squeezed her eyes shut in exasperation. Oh, wonderful . The other one's loose. A path of tiny pressures on the bed, and a three-year-old girl poked her head into Sümeyra's hot circle of distress. Some reflected moonlight found its way through the two rectangular windows and shone on the girl's large dark eyes as she looked at the squirming baby in her mother's arms.   "No, no, no, Mayya… go back to sleep," Sümeyra pleaded softly, running a hand through her daughter's inky hair. "Jafar will be alright. I promise I will get him to shut up soon."   "Why won't 'e go to sleep?" the girl asked, and she touched the wisp-soft hair on her brother's sweat-dampened head experimentally. Her tiny finger trailed down his smooth, plump cheek and arm. "Maybe 'e's thirsty?" she suggested.   "No, Mayyadah, he isn't. It's probably the heat that's bothering him. I should get up and draw a bat-...-th...."   Sümeyra faltered as she noticed that her son's cries had precipitously disappeared once her daughter touched him.   He now grasped Mayyadah's small finger, studying her with large, uncomprehending, black eyes. In the dim light reflected from his sister's face, it was just barely apparent that his stunned confusion and curiosity melted into a dimpled, tongue-tipped smile.   Mayyadah giggled and uncurled her brother's fingers from her own pointer.  She tickled his stomach, earning a cascade of giggles from him. Sümeyra smiled warmly on the pair and felt relieved and thought it was just a little bit strange that a tiny girl could have the composure and wherewithal to so quickly and confidently calm a fussy infant. Indeed, she even felt a bit jealous.   In his study, behind closed doors through which Sümeyra and Mayyadah knew not to enter, Adhemar leant over a rosewood desk, his head buried in his arms. Against the cool surface, his head sagged in sleep; he was lost to the world. An inkwell, reed pen, and two ink-marked pieces of paper rested near his arms.   Adhemar had a younger brother, Farshad, who governed the city of the Anvari family's origin, who had aged into serenity and tolerance, and who could be counted on in his mature years to return a letter from Adhemar with solicitousness and a written balm of sustained, reasonable thought.   But in this case, regarding news of the deeds of Jabril's contingent, Adhemar felt that it wouldn't do to risk early exposure by putting the sordid information immediately in the post. Feeling thus stifled, he had resolutely written two letters. On the first paper was written:     My dear brother,     Tonight, our family has both risen higher and sunken lower than imaginable. Maziyar, Jabril, and I contracted a magician, who calls himself 'Destane', to assist us in staging a coup against Talal Sayegh. He enthusiastically agreed to our proposition, and thoroughly enchanted the sultan and several of his advisors and friends, before dispatching them all to an anonymous, shameful fate.   Farshad, I saw a young man in his 20s wield the powers of heaven, and reduce thirteen rich, dutiful lives to lifeless mounds of gray sand and release the lot into the desert.   I suppose one must look at it as a mercy that he will terminate the families in the same way – at least they will not live to sustain the loss of their fathers, brothers, and cousins.     Jabril ibn Saddaq Halabi is our new sultan, and Maziyar his grand vizier. I served them faithfully, according to their wishes, though I admit I forgot my place and asserted the notion that Destane might enchant the minds of Agrabah, and beyond, if necessary – the demon surely had the power. Jabril contradicted me, and demanded a violent action in order to bolster his claim to rule.   Frankly, Farshad, I believe he has long waited for just such a chance to spectacularly establish his personal legitimacy on a number of levels.     It is difficult for me to express this, but I realize that my participation in this affair will change the course of, and shape the rest of my life, my children's lives, and our lives. The multitude of possible manifestations of these changes, which I cannot hope to imagine accurately at this stage, terrifies me.     I hope that you are able to travel to Agrabah soon, and comfort me with your keen mind and attentive heart.     On the paper he would actually send his brother was written merely:       Farshad,     Jabril has claimed the sultanate, and appointed Maziyar his grand vizier. He has not yet divined a purpose for me, so at present I will continue in my capacity as an ambassador.   Please visit Agrabah as soon as you are able. We have much to discuss.     Your solicitous brother, Adhemar   A Sleepless Night  Some hours past midnight, Maziyar Anvari strode swiftly home, a long black shadow slipping through the gauzy darkness, having lately parted ways with Jabril and Destane.   Only the scholarly might be awake now, lamp flames glowing in the windows of their studies, but no such private room faced upon the street, so only menacing moonlight illuminated Maziyar's way. At last, he reached his own house, and he flowed through the dark ground floor, heading – knowingly – for the courtyard beyond.   In the shade of a fig tree in the center, a female figure sat on a bench. She leant forward pensively, her wrists straining as she gripped the edge. Under the touch of the moon, bangles glinted at her wrists.   She appeared like an ancient weeping woman in marble bas relief, her gown in sculptural folds and her hair in glassy waves.   Malakeh, who was not actually weeping, lifted her head at the sound of her husband's footfalls on the flagstones. She rose and extended her arms to him, and they impulsively crashed together, Maziyar's arms curling about her waist, and Malakeh's elbows on his shoulders as she grasped his head and kissed him deeply.   When they both stopped for breath, panting, Malakeh still tangled her fingers in her husband's curls, desiring to bury him in the warmth of her relief, gratitude, and admiration. She breathed him in, and caught a scent of magic, like stormy air, and she involuntarily rocked against his hips.   When her logical thought caught up with her, her cheeks burned. She looked sharply at him, mortified. Maziyar smiled at her, merely bemused, black eyes glittering hopefully. To reclaim some dignity, she gently pressed her palm against her husband's chest, putting some inches between them.   "Is it done?" she asked.   "For tonight," Maziyar murmured, looking a bit put out. He rubbed her shoulder, and a silence fell between them.   Malakeh timidly ventured, "I worried what he'd do to you… and it would have been all my fault…"   Maziyar shook his head. "He needs us right now. He has one short-term ambition, and he needs to use Jabril's royal authority as leverage in order to achieve it. Malakeh, beauty , you've played a distinguished role in ensuring the greatest success to date for my family."   Malakeh's lips curled, her proud smile tightening to anxiousness. She trailed fastidiously maintained fingertips along his sculpted cheekbone, and murmured, "He won't always need you."   "We'll deal with that when we come to it, won't we?" Maziyar assured her, his voice rising slightly. He captured her wandering fingers and gave the knuckles a slow kiss.   His confidence … what a rich, tasty thing that was, Malakeh thought. How fatly intoxicating. How it thrillingly enlivened his otherwise hard features, and enticed one to hope and to let him lead, instead of to think for oneself. He dreamed longer distances than he strategized. However pathetically diffident Adhemar was, Maziyar truly did need his brother. This Malakeh understood. And there was something Maziyar needed to understand.   "Promise me you won't allow the sorceror to come anywhere near our family, " she pressed. " Warn me when he will be received at the palace... for the children's sake."   "Of course," Maziyar replied, laughing lightly. "Did you imagine you would be socializing with him on those occasions? You are a presumptious woman!"   Malakeh smiled weakly.   "Still," Maziyar continued. "I'm glad you told me, before I might have invited him to dine with us."   His wife's jewel eyes expanded and her cultivated black eyebrows furrowed in an expression of aristocratic terror.   Maziyar laughed sympathetically. Before – and after – everything else, Malakeh believed the man who called himself Destane to bear the muck and the mind of the streets. Even on her best days, she regarded the notion of feeding and entertaining such creatures at one's own expense as a quixotic, self-righteous venture divorced from good sense. One practices discipline – not indulgence – with stray dogs.   "Oh, what must that magician have done to earn your bitter distaste?" a mirthful Maziyar mused aloud, idly fondling a jet-black spiral of Malakeh's hair. Then he thought of an agreeably concrete question that he felt would shed light on the matter. "What does your father think of him?"   "Well, naturally, " said Malakeh, shaking her head as though it was obvious. "He thinks of him as a coarse malignance, who can, unfortunately , make himself useful."   "On that occasion you told me about… when your father hired him for a magical hand in financial assistance–"   "Don't call it that," Malakeh hissed, wincing.   Maziyar smirked. "On that occasion… did Destane cheat him in some way?" he continued.   Malakeh was silent.   Then she answered, "Yes."   After another odd pause, she elaborated, "Destane was not faithful to the terms of agreement, and betrayed my father's trust."   Malakeh carefully watched her husband's face as she said this, and she put in a bid for sympathy: "There was much bitterness on both sides… I won't forgive him for that."   Maziyar nodded, thoughtfully, and encircled his wife with his arm, leading her back to the house. After inhaling his strange scent again, however, Malakeh tugged on her husband's waist and forcibly led him into the kitchen, where she bade him sit. Maziyar watched as she seized the maid's big copper pot - something the elegant, soft-fingered Malakeh never touched - and marched back out into the courtyard.   He marveled when she returned moments later from the ornamental pond, heaving the sloshing vessel. She trembled a bit under its weight, but an insane urgency propelled her. She snatched one of the maid's cleaning cloths, and her surprised husband scrambled to unhook the buttons running down the center of his severe black robe.   It would have been quite reasonable for Maziyar to begin questioning the source of this unnatural zeal which drove his wife to kneel at his feet and scrub his skin, to willingly sacrifice the integrity of her fine gown and her regal bearing... especially when he could clean himself just as well.   But that sort of cool, dispassionate inquiry was more in Adhemar's nature than Maziyar's, and the younger brother happily gave himself to oblivion as his wife's long, wet fingers kneaded through his curls and massaged his scalp.   **************************   When Jabril arrived at his house in the dead of night, the place was silent. His wife, Pareesa, was a still mound under the sheet and a welter of black hair on the pillow. Her girlishly round cheeks and unconcerned eyebrows exuded serenity. Jabril sank onto the bed next to her, and she didn't stir; she'd been asleep for a couple of hours already. She did not sense Jabril's sweating, magic-reeking presence, so he simply lay there, with no attempt to cleanse himself, and let his thoughts wash over him instead.   He marveled at the night's events. He thought of his own powerful decision, so much bolder than any choice he'd made in the past. It was a pragmatic, thoughtful decision; anybody could see that. The energy and might that both freighted and flowed in the wake of that decision… he glowed with it. He had never felt so competent and respected, the way his men followed his orders, even if they objected to them or struggled against them as Adhemar had.   Adhemar was always so cool and collected, one who discretely conducted debate, who issued good advice only after he had thoroughly vetted it. For the vetting process and the debate to be taken out of his hands, for Adhemar to publically scrabble so frantically for it… Jabril found it a refreshing change. Maybe this humbling experience would make Adhemar more tolerable, he mused.   These thoughts did not help Jabril sleep; rather, they quickened the blood, inducing him to defensiveness and sending his mind along the tracks of well-practiced imagined dialogues between himself and a legion of other men. Things he should have said, things he'd like to say.   He could not help reflecting then on the wives and children of some of them, whom he'd visited earlier tonight, with Maziyar and Destane.   Due to the lateness of the hour, most of the households had retired to sleep, and Destane's arrival by their bedsides had no more registered with them than the arrival of the more benign Sandman. However, some of the wives had decided to stay up and wait for their husbands, sometimes accompanied by small sons who relished the opportunity to stay up late, like 'important' people. The women had greeted Jabril, Maziyar, and Destane with surprise and confusion: neither the sorceror nor the ambassador were known to them, and though for at least fifteen years everyone had known that the great Saddaq Halabi had a son, very few knew him personally or cared to learn what he looked like.   The women were discomfited, Jabril had noted, in the mundane way that women encountering men in the absence of their husbands always were. As he and Destane had persuaded themselves inside, the better to inform the women about their lately departed husbands, the discomfort had immediately bloomed into suspicion. Nevertheless, even when Destane conjured a new hourglass in front of them, they neither suspected nor preempted exactly what the sorceror would do to them.   Their protests and their fright had then and did now conspire to overwhelm Jabril, as he lay sleeplessly next to his wife. But as a grown man, if he didn't have the discipline and conviction to carry out his plans and achieve his goals (or worse, failed in these pursuits because of an excess of sentimentality!), then what did he have? Why should he deserve anything, why should his wife respect and honor him, if he couldn't do what all men should be able to do?   It was the best choice, Jabril assured himself, to do what he did to the families. They would be nothing, and be accorded no respect or kindness, without their husbands and fathers. It was better that they not be made to suffer this mortal coil in the wake of a deceased patriarch.   Jabril shut his eyes, but he might just as well still have been staring at the wooden boards of the floor above, for all the sweet oblivion it conferred upon him. He rolled onto his side and decided he should start restricting the coffee he drank in the evenings.   Adhemar and Sümeyra In the bed where Sümeyra had slept, Adhemar dozed alone. Dark gold sunlight stretched yawning tendrils across the stone window sill, lightening the room like a dream. The sweat of the night had dried, leaving an all-too-evanescent coolness. There was the delicate clink of glass and a trickle of pouring water from the kitchen as Sümeyra brewed two cups of tea. A breeze glided in through the shutters, dandling her dark curls and caressing her face, but her grimace didn't lift.   Her husband's recent nocturnal comings and goings (little explained and of dubious purpose), coupled with his lying abed this late, made her anticipate he had something uncomfortable he needed to tell her. She was also annoyed at him, because she would not breakfast without him, and yet, this ritual preceded her walk to collect ingredients from the market. Even now, she knew, most merchants had set up their wares and were haggling with mothers and maidservants over the nice, fat eggplants and cucumbers, over the ripest pomegranates. Sümeyra faced the long task of careful selection and committed bargaining, and the shops would close at midday if she didn't get going! The man simply has no idea , she thought.   She placed the glasses on a tray with some small spoons and, out of habit, placed two sugar cubes by each glass. Her shoulders sagged as she exhaled. Of course, it's only natural for someone who's never cooked for himself , she thought. Sümeyra wasn't bitter; rather, she was indifferent. She retired from battles rather than throw herself into them. Reticence, grace, and thick skin were necessities for her life in Adhemar's world, as well as byproducts of it.   On her way to the bedroom with the etched copper tray, Sümeyra passed the sitting room. There, Mayyadah lay on her stomach on the cool wooden settee, stark naked and riffling through a book that was clearly Adhemar's. Though her daughter was just three years old, Sümeyra had seen her this past year looking at the books she had brought from her parents' home in Iznikora, many day's travel away. When Sümeyra spoke sternly, the girl looked up with wide guilty eyes.   "Mayyadah! Put that back before your father wakes up! And at least put on a shift; we're going to market soon."   On the force of her mother's mood, the girl scurried to Adhemar's study. After her, Sümeyra called more softly, "Go to your room and watch Jafar for a bit, alright?"   Without waiting for an answer, Sümeyra returned to her bedroom and gently shut the door behind her. On a low brass tea table at the foot of the bed, she placed the tray and went to her husband's side to prod him.   Blearily, Adhemar opened his lids a fraction and studied his wife, with her expectant face and the challenging jut of her jaw.   "There's tea," she blurted.   As Adhemar freed himself from the grip of sleep, Sümeyra retrieved the cups and placed the warm vessel in his hand. He sniffed the mint, his moustache twitching, and Sümeyra impatiently took a sip of her own.   "It's late," she said.   He did not look at her, while he inhaled the clean, warm vapors. "I know. I woke up at my desk in the depths of night and tried to fall asleep again in here."   This wasn't out of the ordinary for Adhemar, but even so, a part of Sümeyra quaked in fear as he shunned the intimacy of eye contact and grimly regarded his tea.   Her father, in Iznikora, would do the same thing when as a young girl she acted inconsiderately, and Sümeyra would know that quick correction was expected of her. It stung and embarrassed her. On her husband's face, when it was he - and not she - who had some explaining to do, it simply galled her.   "What is it, then?" she snapped.   Adhemar appeared to be considering the best way to frame his response, before he decided to just hang it all and drop bluntly, "We're going to be living in the palace now."   It sounded like a joke to Sümeyra, but her husband's body language hinted at darker implications. Alarmed, she began, "But the sultan–"   "–is Jabril Halabi now. He will be doing things a bit differently."   She could not suppress a soft gasp. She thought for a moment. "…. Last night?"   Adhemar nodded.   "…. Are you telling me ," she got out, incredulously, "...that Jabril Halabi, the accountant son of Saddaq, won a duel against one of Talal's best warriors?"   Adhemar sipped some more mint tea. His left hand, gripping the sheet, flexed and unflexed fitfully. "There was a sorcerer," he said, staring vacantly over the glass's gold rim.   When this did not earn a response from Sümeyra, he finally looked at her.   Her face, a twisted mask of disbelief, slid reluctantly into credulity.   Her mud-brown eyes wide with alarm and now curiousity, she managed, "I… I didn't think they existed. I read fairy stories about them… long before we were ever married. I suppose I always wondered, but…. I never saw one."   Adhemar gazed at her, grateful to discuss something speculative and impersonal, if only for the moment. "You would not recognize them on sight, I think," he said. "But maybe by the smell. Their magic can be smelt. This sorcerer called himself Destane, and he smelt humid, like dirt after a rainstorm, or like a house where snakes are kept."   Sümeyra made a face. "You met him? And he left you… unharmed? "   "He's not politically ambitious," he explained. "He seems to have lived in Agrabah for quite some time,"– this earned him a look of horror from his wife – "simply practicing magic, I suppose. He lives in a run-down hovel in an alley. If he'd had designs on the throne… we'd be living in a very different city right now."   Adhemar turned, uncomfortably, back to his tea. The gears were turning in Sümeyra's head.   "It was you who hired him," she concluded.   "Jabril, Maziyar, and I did, on a suggestion from Maziyar's wife."   A dark look came over Sümeyra's face.   Her voice was low, freighted with suspicion: "How did Malakeh know of the sorcerer?"   "According to Maziyar, she told him that Destane had done a job for her parents some years back… well, I suppose the sorcerer has to pay for his food and oil somehow."   Sümeyra said nothing. She thought only of Malakeh, with her beautiful, imperious profile, and the way her lips had quirked in distaste – that subtle, elegant movement – in the days when Sümeyra struggled with the dialect in Agrabah, when Sümeyra had misguidedly shared anecdotes from her past as a tradesman's daughter.   Malakeh's thoughts on Sümeyra's roughness, so prettily suppressed when Maziyar proposed small suppers for the two couples, fluttered out easily enough when the wives were alone.   Yes, why shouldn't that woman know about someone as awful as Destane? Sümeyra thought bitterly.   "What did he do to the sultan? And his men?" she asked.   Adhemar again considered his response. With a heavy heart, he feared what she would think of him, when she knew exactly what he had sanctioned. Then he noticed how she sounded rather more curious than mortified or reproachful.   Adhemar changed tack.   Honestly interested, he asked his wife, "What do you think he did?"   This question frightened Sümeyra.   "I... I suppose he killed them all." She felt dirtied for having expressed this, and replied, angrily, "I don't know! You were there – you tell me!"   Adhemar flinched, but decided he could be candid now.   "He transformed the whole lot into sand and scattered them into the desert."   This gave Sümeyra pause.   "No one would ever find all of those grains…." she murmured.   "Exactly."   Adhemar waited a moment for Sümeyra to follow the trail of her thoughts. He prompted, "What do you think of that?"   Feeling examined again, Sümeyra fled from his gaze, dropping her eyes to her knees.  She muttered, "I can scarcely believe it.   Adhemar watched her.   Sümeyra stood up suddenly from the bed, muttering, "It's time to be getting on." She collected the tray, with sugar cubes untouched, and swept out of the bedroom.   The Sultan and the Hero of Agrabah  When the bedroom was half-full with pink early daylight, Pareesa stretched pleasurably and relaxed on her pillow, contemplating the prospect of the new day.   She breathed in an acrid odor that was distinct from, and stranger than, the usual morning funk. Like stormy weather, but definitely less electric and more dubiously organic. She rolled over and was disturbed to find it emanating from her husband.   She considered waking him immediately and persuading him to wash. A flurry of domestic counter-arguments swarmed through her mind, so instead, she quickly climbed out of the sheets, threw on a loose robe, and vacated the room.   An hour later, when the growing light forcibly awoke Jabril, he turned to see Pareesa had gone. Pulling on a robe for modesty, he went into the sitting room, and found his wife fully dressed and groomed, reading from an anthology of poems to chubby little Hamed, who – at three years old – may or may not have been listening as he sat on the floor and played with his mother's embroidered gold slippers.   "Where's Dad?" Jabril asked.   Pareesa looked at him meaningfully. "He felt like sleeping on the roof last night. I went to help him down for breakfast, but he wanted to see you first. He wanted to make sure he had a chance to talk to you before you left in the morning."   Jabril experienced a sudden coldness at this news, and he turned to go access the ladder to the roof.   "Please…" Pareesa began, and Jabril looked at her impatiently.   "Please could you quickly clean up for breakfast," she continued, her nostrils flaring. "The rice is getting cold."   Jabril sniffed his arm, and tersely nodded before whirling out of the room.   *****************************   Jabril pushed open the trapdoor to the roof and saw his father seated on a sleeping mat with his back to his son. He was watching the sea of city roofs and the red ridged mountains through the cool morning mist, which was quickly clarifying in the hot, rising sun. Jabril walked over and seated himself cross-legged next to his father.   Saddaq rested back on his wrists, one leg curled in at the knee, with his bad leg extended and relaxed. These days, in his early sixties, a significant portion of Saddaq's warrior bulk had drifted south, and in his sable hair and full beard there was a mess of gray. He looked at his son seriously.   "Something strange happened last night while you were out," he said.   "Ye-ess?" Jabril prompted impatiently, scanning his father's eyes.   Saddaq gestured in a few directions, with large, powerful hands. "I heard shouts coming from houses… it was there, there, there, and over there."   Jabril acknowledged, innocently, that it was unusual to hear unrelated shouts in a large variety of locations over such a short period of time.   "Could it be thieves?" Saddaq wondered.   Jabril shrugged. "Might be."   Saddaq laid a hand, weighted with righteousness, on Jabril's arm. "Jabril," he said. "It pains me no end, but I can't protect your wife and son the way I ought to be able to. I think we should discuss our strategy in case of–"   "It wasn't thieves , Saddaq," Jabril suddenly snapped, jerking away his arm.   He bristled at his father's assumption that any man other than Pareesa's husband should protect Pareesa and Hamed, and at his father's failure to recognize this assertion as offensive.   A shade behind Saddaq's eyes slammed down, and he waited grimly for an explanation. A small, ancient part of Jabril began quaking at this look in his father's eyes. But Jabril wasn't a boy anymore, he reminded himself, and he pressed forward.   "It was the sorcerer, Destane, and I was with him."   Saddaq's eyes expanded in rage.   "Why were you assisting such a deviant in his evil works?!" he cried.   Jabril forced himself to stay stone cold and articulate. "Because we were doing what needed to be done."   "You had better explain," Saddaq whispered dangerously.   "Gladly. With Destane's assistance, my team of twelve has wrested the sultanate from Talal Sayegh and disposed of him and his most loyal supporters. What you heard was Destane dealing with the families in like fashion."   Saddaq just stared at his son.   "Destane has transformed them into sand, and released them into the desert," Jabril continued. "I will reward him richly for his services with some property in Ahsa Asmara. He will always have the Halabi to thank: you for his city, and me for his home."   Saddaq seemed to have lost the ability to speak.   " Father! " Jabril demanded, his eyes fierce. "Have I not finally achieved something in this world that is worthy of the son of General Halabi, the Conqueror?!"   Saddaq looked away, snorting derisively.   Jabril was floored by this response.   "What more would you have me do , oh great one?! " he cried incredulously. "Your son controls the empire, and your grandson will never know a life in which he was not destined to rule. Stories of our family will go down in the annals of history!"   Saddaq looked pityingly at his son.   A stranger receiving this glance from Saddaq might for an instant expect the old warrior to enfold him in a sympathetic embrace, but Jabril had long ago learned to see his father's expression as laced with condescension.   Saddaq sighed ponderously, and explained, "You've committed treason, and in doing so, you've stooped to using those beastly men who exercise without moral compunction a set of powers outstripping all acceptable limits. If you can't understand what is wrong with this, then you have learned nothing."   Jabril stared stonily at his father.   "You've made a mockery of fair combat," Saddaq went on. "As a consequence, your 'achievement' means nothing."   A moment passed in which the warrior's discharged gift of profundity expanded like a balloon in the still morning air, filling up the cracks in Jabril's consciousness, threatening resistant tendrils of thought with suffocation.   Jabril sighed heavily, and clambered to his feet. He looked down his nose at his gravely disappointed father, earthbound by his injury. "You can lay out a dish of platitudes if you want, but I'm your son, and I under stand you. I have no doubt that when you were conducting your campaigns you would have happily hired a sorcerer if you thought he would provide a tactical advantage," he spat. ( Or , Jabril thought, if you'd even known where to find one... )   Jabril percieved that, after this accusation, Saddaq couldn't possibly have stored up an honest argument sufficient to sustain his air of unflappable moral authority.   However, he never saw so much as a crack appear in his father's mask of solemn condemnation. He only caught a flicker of defensive posturing in Saddaq's calculating, evaluating, deep brown eyes.   Jabril scoffed.   In frustraton, he turned on his heel and strode back over to the trapdoor. Saddaq still said nothing, allowing Jabril's argument the indignity of disregard. This tactic does not in general win arguments, except when used by a father.   "If you are expecting me to express remorse, or to glory in self-abasement at your feet…." Jabril sneered, lifting up the trapdoor, "… Then you need to wake up."   He gave a little mocking bow, and indicated the interior of the house. "Wake up and have some breakfast , why don't you?"   With that, Jabril descended the ladder and slammed the door shut on his father.   Pareesa tried to complain as Jabril swept out of the house and turned toward the palace, but he stonewalled her.   Pareesa didn't have the energy for fuming.   Resigned, she went to climb the ladder and assist Jabril's father.   Whispers in the Marketplace (Part 1)  Adhemar emerged from his bedroom to find Sümeyra pouring her tea over one of the curling green plants she kept. When she met his eyes, all creatures would have run from her stare.   Her husband quickly averted his eyes, straightened his green bisht, and exited the house.   Sümeyra went to the room where her children slept. There were two bare bottoms on the cool stone floor, and there was a continuous babble as Mayyadah taught her brother to pick up the dried dates when she bounced a ball.   Sümeyra was too deeply mired in disappointment for the sight to charm her. She noted that, as often happened, her daughter showed the maturity to watch after her brother, but failed to complete much simpler tasks.   "I tell you to get dressed, Mayya, and you go and double the number of undressed limbs?" she managed, sweetly. "Better fix that now. We're going."   The girl sighed, abandoning the game. She trotted over to the pile of clothes folded at the foot of her bed, while Sümeyra hoisted up the baby to wrap him. As Mayyadah wiggled into a little black shift, Sümeyra added, "I'm going to call on Pareesa today, so you'll need to play nicely with Hamed."   Mayyadah sighed ponderously, and wandered out to get the market basket. She mumbled little half-hearted "no"s, and Sümeyra rolled her eyes.   " You're not going to be this willful in a couple of years, are you?" she murmured to her son, but Jafar only looked to the side and busied himself with eating his own hand.   **************************   Mayyadah was swinging the basket as Sümeyra, with her son sitting on her arm, stepped up to the Halabi house. Pareesa answered the door, and as she opened it, Sumeyra could see that Saddaq, that mountainous man, had collapsed on a divan before the low table which bore their breakfast.   On the floor, Hamed placidly chewed his food, while the older man never took a bite.  He looked defeated.   Sümeyra could see that Pareesa's large, round eyes were haunted, too.   "Let's talk," said Sümeyra.   "Yes, please," Pareesa assented, thirstily.   The young wife directed Hamed to finish eating, and she attended to her father-in-law. "I'm going to help Sümeyra at the market. I'll be back by midday," she assured, dropping a kiss on his forehead.   The large man nodded wordlessly.   Pareesa bent down to speak to Mayyadah. "Here, let me take the basket."   The girl hesitated, and her little fingers curled tighter around the handle.   "Mayyadah…" Sümeyra warned.   "No, no…" the girl managed, looking confused. On market day, this was her basket.   "It will become too heavy for you, Mayyadah," the sweet Pareesa explained (the woman was 10 years younger than Sümeyra). She wrapped her plump fingers around the handle and gently tugged it out of Mayyadah's grasp. "You can help your mother collect some vegetables, how about that?"   The girl gave a little moan, and Pareesa patted her head. "Go walk with Hamed now, why don't you?"   Mayyadah rubbed at the spot on her head where the woman had patted it, and she reluctantly fell into step next to the boy. Hamed held an intricate golden toy, lacquered purple and green, with many interlocking parts. As the girl watched, Hamed became further absorbed in the toy and did not meet her eyes.   The women walked almost shoulder-to-shoulder, long brown robes swishing. In a low voice, Sümeyra began: "This must be quite a shock for you… being now married to the sultan."   Pareesa flushed pleasurably. "Yes… and my son, now heir to the throne! I never expected such a change. I thought I would be a good mother if I raised him to follow his father, and become a valued member of Talal or Salman's staff. Now there will be so many more expectations… so much more specialized education…."   Pareesa suddenly clutched the older woman's arm gravely. "Sümeyra?"   "Yes, what is it?" asked Sümeyra.   "It's a terrible thing to say, but I'm worried about my husband."   "In what way?"   "He wasn't raised for the sultanate from the cradle, like the prince. He doesn't know how to rule. I fear he won't be able to lead the empire."   Sümeyra looked away, and she decided not to confess the doubts that had flooded her mind when Adhemar had revealed to her the identity of the new sultan. Instead, she tried to assuage the younger woman's fears.   "I'm sure Maziyar and my husband will guide him carefully, and soundly. They will overcome this trial."   "Yes, I can only hope so. I think he shall depend greatly on your husband's wisdom, Sümeyra."   Sümeyra smiled bitterly.   Pareesa was just about to ask after that, when a cry erupted from her son.   Hamed was going red, while Mayyadah peacefully examined the pretty toy in her hands. Hamed's cries grew as the girl continued to play with his toy, unpunished.   Pareesa looked expectantly at Sümeyra.   The older woman bowed her head, blushing deeply.    Sümeyra rallied her strength, and was stern.  "Mayyadah, return the toy to Hamed, now."   "No," the little girl replied easily.   Pareesa's eyes rounded in shock.   Sümeyra burned from the accusatory shade she detected in the younger woman's expression. "You will give the toy to Pareesa, then," she ground out, pronouncing each word furiously.   The little girl could not seriously question the combined authority of the two women. She reluctantly handed the toy to Pareesa, who did not pat her head this time. Pareesa returned the toy to her son.   "I'm sorry," Sümeyra said. "Mayyadah has a mind of her own. It doesn't matter what you tell her; she always considers obedience optional."   It was just then that the girl snatched the toy again, and Hamed cried out in protest.   "Mayyadah?!" Sümeyra cried out, exasperated and embarrassed.   Pareesa stared coldly at the girl, and laid a hand on the toy in the girl's grasp. Mayyadah pulled at it defensively, sure that the woman would just give it back to Hamed so he could ignore her.   "Give it to me now, Mayyadah."   The girl relinquished it when Pareesa added, "Nobody gets the toy."   Mayyadah was familiar with this phrase from Sümeyra's mouth. Resigned, she fell back into stride with Hamed, and she watched the little curlicues of dust puffing up around her small shoes. Hamed's plump chin fell upon his chest, as he had no toy to play with now.   "You weren't lying about her, were you?" commented Pareesa.   Sümeyra sighed. She put her free arm around her quiet, observant son, and cradled him against her chest. She kissed his forehead, and said nothing.   Across the river was the marketplace. An ancient stone bridge arched up before the mothers and their children. Mayyadah could see the first shops just beyond the end of the bridge.   Remembering her typical market day excitement, she bounded ahead of the others, her dusty black shift flapping around her ankles. She happily scaled the bridge to its apex, stopping to hop up and down and peep over the edge at the course of the river, that lazy slide of blue, as it wound its way out of the city. She ran down the other side, out of sight.   "Aren't you going to call her back?" Pareesa inquired of Sümeyra, as they themselves scaled the bridge.   "She'll come back when she wants to play with her brother," Sümeyra assured her, bouncing the baby on her arm. "She may not be an obedient child, but she is a loyal one."   Now deprived of his toy, Hamed jogged before them, attempting to catch up with Mayyadah. Sümeyra chuckled.   "See how quickly he forgets my daughter's crime!"   "I should hope he always remains quick to forgive," Pareesa defended. "It's a virtue."   Sümeyra thought about Pareesa's approach to dealing with her own husband.   "Well," Sümeyra sighed. "It will make his life simpler."   The marketplace was full of activity. There were flashes of vibrant color as textile merchants folded and displayed their fabrics. There was the clatter and singing of jewelry, oil lamps, and other brassware changing hands. Everywhere, there was the buzz of women and maidservants haggling over objects, nudging their ideal prices up to compromise.  Merchant friends laughed and jocularly sought deep discounts from one another.   At mid-morning, the sun's warmth was growing, but shade from the tiered houses on either side was languid and cool. The air was redolent with the smoky fragrance of spitting meat and vegetables, with the mixed scents from a whole spectrum of spices and powders, with aromatic tendrils flowing from the coffeehouse. Sümeyra saw her daughter and Hamed some distance off, accepting gratuitous pieces of fresh cooked lamb from Ali, her meat merchant. Satisfied, she turned with Pareesa to begin measuring out a bagful of brown rice at Hosseini's stall.   Whispers in the Marketplace (Part 2) Hamed had found that when Mayyadah asked the meat man for a treat, she got some juicy, spicy grilled lamb on a stick. When he stood next to her, so did he.   He decided to follow her.   The girl had rituals. Hamed followed her to a man who sold tobacco and hashish. The man had a table under an awning for transactions, and he surrounded himself with twists of tobacco and a myriad glasses of hashish.   Mayyadah gripped the edge of his table, and hoisted herself on tiptoe in order to take in all the smells. Her beaming head swung about and her little nostrils flared as she audibly inhaled. Hamed sniffed the mixture a few times, and he was not particularly moved.   The man who worked at the table paused over his ledger, and regarded his short little visitors. His face twisted in a wry smirk, and he teased Mayyadah: "Do you notice anything different in the bouquet today?"   "No," the girl replied with a smile, and she toddled on to the next diversion.   Hamed followed her to a textiles shop. The girl leaped to touch different fabrics. There was no rhyme or reason to her choices; she merely followed her eyes: a violet as bright as a prince's garments, a teal deeper than the green of any plants Sümeyra kept, and a red with the vibrance of sunset. Hamed noticed how the merchant had arranged the fabrics by color. His round, dark eyes traveled over a continuous spectrum of saturated color, well organized by a careful hand.   Hamed liked this shop. He wanted to stay and brush his little fingers over the robes with looping goldwork, but Mayyadah was moving on.   They came upon a rug shop. A short bridge arched overhead, between the rug shop and the building opposite. The merchant had hung his most prized rug from the bridge ledge, where it swayed gently in the breeze. Mayyadah peered into the shop, which looked to be cavernous.   She turned to smile broadly at Hamed. "Wait 'ere, and count. Then come find me," she said, before bolting into the dark of the shop. Hamed didn't know how long to count, and he had only heard his mother's maidservant say a few numbers before, so he repeated those before cautiously creeping into the shop.   The floor was covered in rugs, straightened out for display, rolled into tubes, and piled by the walls. A staircase in the corner led up to the second floor and and provided bridge access. More rugs than Hamed could count hung from the second floor gallery. He marveled at the red, green, gold, and black. It was all so impossibly wonderful.   He almost forgot he was supposed to be finding Mayyadah, until he heard a tiny voice sing out, "'Ahhh-med..."   Hamed turned about in confusion. He looked round and round, but he only saw rugs. He peeked behind hanging rugs, looked under the staircase, and as he passed a pile of rolled up carpets, he didn't notice them stir as a small figure climbed out from underneath the tubes, and lunged at him.   Hamed was face-down on the soft carpet as Mayyadah cackled and tickled him. The boy at first cried out, then began laughing. He rolled over, and fought to push her away.   "Now you 'ide!" she cried, and ran to the front of the shop to shut her eyes and count. Hamed caught his breath, and decided to hide behind a hanging carpet.   Mayyadah found him quite quickly. Hamed was studying his concealing rug with dreamy eyes. He didn't bother to move from his woven shade as Mayyadah ran to hide. He vaguely heard the staircase creak a few times.   When the boy dutifully emerged and went to check under the stairs again, the girl lost her patience and called "'Ahmed!" from the second floor gallery. Hamed looked up to see the girl clambering over the railing and taking hold of the side of the carpet.    The merchant, who had come in to see what the children were up to, unfortunately saw this as well.   He stood, horror-stricken, as the girl leaped.   Mayyadah gave a gleeful cry, and her weight jerked the whole carpet over the railing.    She landed in a pile of smaller rugs, the large one tumbling in huge folds over her. Hamed giggled uncontrollably as the merchant gaped.   Finally, the man strode over and rolled back the rug to reveal an exuberantly proud, and panting girl. He gave her a withering look, and pointed to the front of his shop.   "Take your game outside," he ordered.   Mayyadah and Hamed bashfully wandered back out into the street. She snuck a small smile at him.   The girl craned her neck, and she saw her mother with Jafar and Hamed's mother gathering vegetables.   "C'mon," she said, and Hamed followed her under the arch of the footbridge, deeper into the marketplace.   Publication Date: September 1st 2015 https://www.bookrix.com/-pd475b9933f3e55
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-tatianna-staton-together-forever/
Tatianna Staton Together Forever Twins forever and ever... Moving As I'm getting on the plane to head to South Carolina I look back at my mom and wave I can tell she has tears in her eyes. I am going to South Carolina to spend time with my dad and twin sister Vannesa the last time I saw my dad and sister was when he got married to a woman named Kim. My dad has his own buisness he owns houses I mean huge houses and Kim is a lawyer their house is a mansion I mean literally a mansion. The palne ride is not really long I spend the time listening to my Ipod and on my laptop my name is Jessica and I am 17 years-old and this is my last year in school. I'm not very tall I have very long black hair with natural brown streaks and I'm hot I mean I couldn't keep a guy to save my life because more than one always liked me and drama started so I always broke up with them. The plane starts landing and I get my thinds together when I'm off the plane I start looking for my dad, Kim, or Vannesa. Finally I spot my dad and Vannesa talking and a man beside them holding up a card that says my name I smile and start to them "hey guys" they look at me and Vannesa screams giving me a huge hug I laugh hugging her back finally she pulls back, looks at me, and gives me another hug laughing. She pulls back again and before she can give me another hug my dad pulls her away and gives me a hug smiling at us Vannesa looks just like me except it looks like she cut her hair a bit we're the same height and you can't even tell us apart. "I'm so glad you're finally here" Vannesa says grabbing one bag and my free hand "we have so much to catch up on and I have so much to show you" we get into the limo "okay, Nessa who's that"? I point to the man helping my dad with my bags "that's Mr. Kizzoli he's the driver" I nod my dad gets in and sits in front of us. "So how you been Ladybug?" that's the nickname my dad gave me "good glad to be here" "Good, Kim wanted to come but I told her to finish setting up your room" I get comfortable and finally we make it to some gates and they open letting us inside. My dad and Vannesa help me with my bags the house door opens and Kim comes out wearing an apron she squeals when she sees me I laugh and give her a hug. "I'm so glad to see you baby girl how are you?" "Good and I'm happy to see you too" she gives me another hug and picks up two bags let's get you settled in. My room is painted my favorite color hot pink with a queen sized bed with a pink comforter and lots of stuffed animals. I got my own bathroom and the whole house has six bedrooms and a bathroom for each "okay after you get settled in meet me in my room cause we're going out" Vannesa says walking out of my room "kay" I unpack puttting my things up I pull my shorts down a little and my cell rings. I answer it seeing my friend Kenya's number on it "hey sis" she yells into the phone "hey Kenya what's up?" "Nothing bored as hell Keisha, Cynthia, Monica, and Channel are all doing something today and Chase dumb ass is no fun at all" I laugh "sorry I had to leave but you guys are definetly going to come visit me" "Hell yeah we are" I hear a knock on my door "come in" Vannesa walks in motioning me to come on I put my Ipod in my pocket. "Kenya Imma have to call you later" she sighs "okay peace" she hangs up and I put my cell in my pocket "okay Vannesa what's up where we going?" "Out to meet guys and go to a concert" I shrug "okay" we walk down the stairs to the door "dad, Kim we're leaving" "Okay" I hear my dad shout. We walk to the garage where a lot of cars are "okay pick one" she says smiling "but not the Mustang that's mine" "Wow" then I chose the green Porsche the key was already in it and here she hands me five one hundred dollar bills. I was used to having this much money becuase every month my dad gave me a thousand dollars "let's go we're driving my car" we get inside Vannesa's blue Mustang "so what concert are we going to see?" I ask buckling my saet belt "South Hood Boys" I nod. We drive to the mall "I'm meeting some friends here" "Okay" we start walking into the mall "you know we really do look like twins dressing alike" we both had on shorts and a black Ed Hardy shirt and some black sandals I laugh "yeah". The inside of the mall is big "whoa" she smiles "yeah big right?" "Yeah" we walk into Victoria's Secret "Vannesa!" we look behind us and turn to see four girls walking up to us "hey guys this is my sister Jessica, Jess this is Monique, Kasey, Mel, and Kristina" "Nice to meet you guys" I say nodding at them "likewise" Mel says smiling at me. "We're ready to go now or we're gonna be late and the guys are gonna be upset" Kristina says pulling her little skirt up a little more "okay come on we can drive the Expedition" Kasey says taking her keys out of her Apple Bottoms purse. We walk out of the store "so Jessica is it exciting being the grinch's twin" Monique jokes we laugh Vannesa hits her arm "yeah she's a good sister" Vannesa puts her arm around my shoulder "see" we walk out of the mall and drive to the concert which is being held at the beaach. Vannesa and Mel walk on either side of me all talking loudly we walk to a group of six boys who I'm guessing they know. "Hey guys" Vannesa says giving one of the guys a kiss on the lips "this is my sister Jessica, Jessica this is my boo Chris and his boys Luke, Malik, Jake, Junior, and Sonny" I shake their hands "it's nice to meet you guys" "same here" Malik says kissing Monique's neck "gosh you can't even tell you guys apart" Luke says with his arms around Mel. "Sure you can Jessica has a bigger ass" Sonny says staring at me they laugh except the girls Kasey slaps him "keep your damn eyes to yourself" he hold up his hands "damn babe I was just playing" "Excuse him Jess" I nod smiling "It's cool" then the concert starts. We move to the front of the crowd close to the stage where we can see good then South Hood Boys come on stage singing their latest song I want you more I start dancing to it as well as Vannesa and her friends. There are four of them the leader is Cash and then there is Jeremy, Zireek, and Kyle they were all so hot and they were the same age as me. Then all of a sudden while Cash is singing he looks at me and he smiles but continues to stare then people start to look at me and I stop looking at Cash and look at my sister who is looking at me with her eyebrows raised. I smile at her and she laughs but start back dancing I look back at the group and Cash looks back at me and winks I am a fan of South Hood Boys but not a craxed one. After they sing four songs they leave the stage and the concert is over they leave the stage and we walk away with me thinking about the connection between me and Cash. "Oh my god Jessica Cash was totally singing to you" Kristina said as she jumped on Jake's back "nah I don't think so Kristina" but I knew he was "girl bye he winked at you and stared at you while he was singing you know he was" Kasey says smiling at me I shrug. "Hey you wait up" we all look back to see what the commotion is and we see Chase running towards us my eyes widen he stops in fron of us and looks me dead in the eye. "Hey I'm Chase, well you knew that" and he laughs I look at my sister and her friends who are all trying to stay cool finally I find my voice. "Um, hey my name is Jessica and this is my sister Vannesa and her friends" he shakes my hand "nice to meet you all" "Same here" Mel says smiling "well I don't mean to hold you guys up but I wanted to know if we could hand out sometime" he says turning to me I raise my eyebrows "o-okay" I stutter. He takes out his cell "what's your number?" "6789991236" he puts it in his cell "you want my number?" I nod taking out my phone he gives me his number "I'll call you and maybe we can hang out before I leave" "Okay cool" he nods at my friends "bye Jessica" "Bye Cash" he runs away then Vannesa and her girls start screaming I laugh "dang girl you just got here and already a celebrity wants to go out with you" I shake my head "he said hang out not go out" we start walking to where Vannesa's car. "So baby where are we going to go tonight?" Chris asks Vannesa "I don't know maybe to the club" "Aiight then well call me and we'll all maake arrangements to meet somewhere" he says giving her a long kiss before pulling away "let's roll guys bye Jess" "Bye" I get in the front seat of Vannesa's car thinking of Cash. A new Friend Publication Date: November 25th 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-sexybubbles
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-ben-lev-the-lost-kids-harry-potter/
Ben Lev The Lost Kids: Harry Potter Charlie, Jacob, Hannah, and Max. Were together and talking to each other." Why'd they take us" " Who are them" " Ewwwww, I'm with a bunch of boys trapped in this filthy place." The man who toke them came and tooke of his hood. Voldermort, from Harry Potter the Movies. "Voldermort, get us out of here and if your real where's the rest?" Suddenly, Harry Potter came and said Expelleontai but nothing came out." "SO If Harry here where's Hermione and Ron." Out came Hermione and Ron laughing. 'Why are you laughing?" They took off their costumes and 3 Mom's And Charlie's dad. He was Voldermort. And They were laughing back Home. The End:) Publication Date: July 10th 2010 https://www.bookrix.com/-benlev
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-kastesha-brumfield-i-love-my-mamas-boyfriend/
Kastesha Brumfield I LOVE MY MAMAS BOYFRIEND raped and sentenced No dad stop this is not right i am your daughter no mom help me . As my dad begin to rape me i felt like n one was there i wanted to die i wanted to scream but i could not feel pain anymore i had thought i was his daughter but apprently not for him to rape and think he gonna get away with it he said im going to kill you how about that he wraps a cord around my neck he pulled tight i could not breathe i pretended to be dead he thought i was so he stop i was fully naked my mom was at work no one knew anyhting so he left me there i started to breathe again then i got my gun loaded it and he deciedes tio vome back in i lay on the bed again i put the gun under my back he starts to rape me again i hit him with the gun he falls he is unconcious i run and put clothes on i pick him up put him in the bed mom walks in i put the gun up i pretend nthing happened i know it would hurt her she would never be happy again she comes in my room wheres your father in the bed he fell sound aslleep we was about to go to the park She goes in the room where he is he says ey bby wheres nikki shes in her room why just wanted to know she says im about to cook i have to go to the store nd pick up some food i say okay mom. dad comes in my room why you did not tell her i say cause i love you dad i dont want anything to happen to you then he kisses me on the lips and leaves i think i liked the kiss he was not my real dad i have always had the ots for him i go in his room and kiss him back then he says no i love your mom i could not live without her so i deciede to kill my mom for him hes mine not hers so i go buy a gas tank i put gas over all her clothes and imake sure my gun is fully loaded and she comes in i say mom i ran your bath water i put extra bubbles she say whats all this for just cause i love you mom i say im cooking dinner i put poisen in her dinner she will never know . she ate the food the next morning shes dead i run in the rom kiss my stepdad for a long time he pushes me off i say dont at like you dont like it he says im calling the police now im sitting in jail writting this story i will seek revenge HAHAHA!!! Publication Date: April 15th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-msalwayspretty
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-yessy-the-story-of-miss-james/
Yessy The Story of Miss James This is the first story I have ever written. Any suggestions are welcomed. Please let me know what you think. Thank you for reading! Copyright. All rights reserved. In the background you can hear music. As she stares through the window everyone seems to be having fun. Dancing, screaming, laughing, without a care in the world. How envious she becomes of those who seem to be carefree and happy. Meanwhile her best friend is still astonished from what she just said. She tries to calm Ms. James by putting her arms around her, giving her hug and smiling. Ms. James looks at her embarrased, ashamed and heartbroken because of her lawless perfomance. Ms. James commands her best friend. "It's time for you to go in. I don't want you to miss out, go ahead and have fun. Leave me here in my misery. Soon I'll recover myself and gain the power that has been drained away." "But you haven't answer my question" she replies. "I will stay here as long as you need, I can't go in and leave you like this. Is there anything I can do to help you and make you feel better?" Ms. James looks at her, grateful for having such a friend that deeply cares about her. "No, it is okay, trust me. I will talk to him as soon as I can. The faster I speak my mind, the better. I can't wait to take this burden off my back. I don't want to ruin your night. After all it is a lovely party. Thank you, you have done enough already. You listened to me, exactly what I needed, just someone to listen." Her best friend leaves worried about the outcome of her dearest friend, Ms. James. But she trust her completely and knows she will never attempt anything foolish. She walks away from Ms. James. As she does, she waves her hand, saying good-bye. "Well it is time." Ms. James says to herself. She wipes off the tears, fixes her outfit and stands tall, not knowing what she is about to become. As Ms. James walks dreadfully to open the door that will lead to the her final fate, there he is. Looking as radiant and ravishing as he always did. As they stumble, their bodies reflect a certain insecurity and nervous reaction. They both sigh as they apologize for the inconvenience. She smiles and ask the most infamous mister, the sole owner of her heart: "I know this is rather unexpected, but may I please talk to you?" Surprised he answers: "Of course you may, is something wrong?" "No, not at all, I just wish to express my feelings in a rather important matter" Ms. James takes a deep breath... "I love you, I always have and after all this time I always will, years have not been enough for me to erase the beautiful memories you and I built. I am sorry for telling this all of the sudden. But I made a huge mistake by letting you go. My pride got in the way. But time has permitted me to see that I was wrong. I apologize, please forgive me. I just wanted to let you know how I felt..." and Ms. James turns away... The gentleman is shocked, he breaths heavily and sighs, not knowing what to do or what to say, for this confession has been outstanding in every way. Never, not even when they were together Ms. James had spoken so bluntly about her regards. He answers: "I forgive you, what do you want to do then? Ms. James is astonished as she contemplates the civility of his question. Calmly she replies: "I don't know." He suggests: "Well what was the purpose of expressing your feelings? Do you want to continue with this relationship, are you giving up or do you want to start over?" Ms. James thinks. This is not what she expected. She thought he was going to reject her. Now she is perplexed and speechless. He becomes inpatient: "You always do the same thing. You have not changed, always selfish, self-centered, it's all about your feelings. Why are you so conceited? After all this time why didn't you say anything? I waited Miss James, I patiently waited for you. You better than anybody knew exactly how I felt. I wanted you to be my wife, to spend the rest of our lives together, to built a family, to love each other until there is no more want. All of the sudden you leave me, because of your insecurities and now after all this years you tell that you do love me, that you made a mistake which is great but you do not know what you want to do about it. You treat me like a fool. Whatever it is that you want or feel, I will no longer wait for your decision. I will not play any of your games. This time I will think of myself." After taking a deep breath, with agony replies:" This is over, I am done Ms. James, this is it, I can't do this anymore." Miss James is shattered. All she needed was a few minutes to digest his reaction. She loved him dearly and after mustering up the courage to express her feelings, he becomes impatient and snaps at her. Filled with dissapointment she utters: "If you waited a few minutes, you could've have what you always wanted, but your lack of patience show the reasons that led me to end this relationship in the first place are still there. You always think the worse of me, expect the worse from me. How can I be with someone who calls me selfish, conceited and self-centered? When all I did throughout all our years together was to give my entire heart to you, live for you? I guess that wasn't enough. Well you are right. This is over, completely over." And she runs away, with her eyes filled with tears, heartbroken. A few months passed by. "Look at her! Does she look awful or what?"- people replied with a selfish disdain towards the inferiority of Miss James circumstances. -"She let him go, I heard, he actually came towards her and she rejected him, what a proud and conceited girl!" Little did they know that Miss James felt no regret over her decision. If she looked bitter it had nothing to do with the fact that she said no. Of course she felt pride, her dignity as a human being was far more important than the opinion of others. But she wasn't the proud or conceited girl that had rejected the amiable man before. She had realized that to be the kind of woman she often professed to be, there were some mayor changes that needed to occur in her life, accomplishments of an emotional sort. Silly peoples, ignorant and ill-mannered neighbors with a simple view of life could only blame Miss James misfortunes to her former love. They couldn't see that perhaps something greater was about to happen and she was about to shut their stupidity once and forever. Miss James and her former love continued to meet occasionally in gatherings, meetings and parties with mutual friends. There were always cordial and treated each other with decorum. Miss James blood boiled inside everytime she saw him. He only felt regret over his reaction and wished to express his remorse but never did. He had the notion that if Miss James was meant for him sooner or later they would end up together. What an unrealistic idea! The fact that he didn't say or did anything provided relief for Miss James. He wasn't part of her life and she felt content at his banishment. This will help not only to overcome the affections which she had developed and the love that had prevail but also to take an inner look at herself and realized with great disappointment that her character has mislead her all along. Now she not only admitted her mistakes but went to the very source of them. It was painful for her to look at her past relationships, her former abuse, the lies, the betrayals, and all the complications of her childhood experiences. They were past gone but the scars were quite real and present. She resented not recognizing them before. Probably it would've avoided her a lot of hardships. But now it's all done with and settled. Oh well who would've thought someone's past could affect so adversely their very future? ................................................. As Miss James continues her deep soul-searching she decides to travel. She travels in and out of the country visiting family members and friends. She decided to stay busy, keep her mind off people who only brought her pain. Among her friends there was a certain young gentleman. His name was Mr. Williams. He had been a long-time family friend. Miss James and Mr. Williams have known each other all their life. They were both the same age, attended the same schools and shared common interest. But now Mr. Williams wasn't the boy she was used to seeing almost everyday. He left his home country to pursue higher education. He had come back as an mature, handsome and succesful young man. Miss James wasn't the annoying little girl who use to pick on him when they were kids. Now she was a beautiful, talented and intelligent young woman. When he came back, he resumed his usual contacts and activities. He was mesmerized by Miss James accomplishments. A year passed by. Miss James was recovering from her blow and Mr. Williams had observed her very carefully. On a particular day her best friend, Miss Wellington, approached Miss James while she was enjoying a cup of tea. She sits next to her and asks her: "What do you think of Mr. Williams? Miss James knowing the source of her curiosity replies: "He is a good friend of the family. Handsome and brilliant. I enjoy his company. And no Sofia, I am not interested in him and I really doubt he sees me as anything else but his good old friend." Miss Wellington smiles and answers: "Well Miss James you are a lot of things, but you are certainly not naive. His attentions to you have been to obvious to be noticed by everyone." "It's been a year, Sofia, since my final break up with you know who. Perhaps it is more appropiate for me to focus on others events, rather than to be falling in love with someone else." "A year my friend! I think that is plenty of time. You have done very well. Rejected plenty of offers. Kept to yourself. But you can't allow this man to keep holding you back from what you deserve!" Miss James looks down on her cup of tea and meditates on her friend's advice. "A year" she thinks. "It took me a lifetime to fall in love with him. I shared my whole life with him for many years. A year is nothing." Miss James kept her thoughts to herself. She was prude and reserved. Her friends notices her reaction and calmly adds: "This time will be different my lovely friend. You know him very well and he has been your friend this past year. But you have to give yourself a chance. I know you are scared. But would'nt you rather take the risk or always wonder what if?" Those words sounded very familiar. Not so long ago she had given her best friend similar advice on a matter. In her friend's case it was about a career. In matters of the heart the risk is much greater. A few moments of silence and suddenly Mr. Williams walks in to join them for tea. Both ladies stand up in amazement and greet him. "I don't mean to interrupt, it looked as if you were having a serious conversation." Miss Wellington replies: "Oh as a matter of fact we were. We were just discussing Miss James misfortunes." "Oh really? I would never think that Miss James had any misfortunes at all!" "You ought to know her better Mr. Williams. She has a vast deal of them, Miss James is a woman of many layers, a deep person you see." "Is that so?" as he turns to Miss James. She blushes at his sight and looks at her friend wishing she would shut up. "If you will excuse me, I just remembered I have to care of something." Miss Wellington excuses herself leaving Miss James and Mr. Williams alone. "Perhaps I should follow your friend's advice, Miss James." "What do you mean?" Miss James whispers. He walks closer towards her: "I should know you better, uncover some of those layers." Miss James is petrified. His smells terrific and he is standing right in front of her. Mr. Williams was the kind of man that with one look, one touch, will make your heart stop beating and everything else dissapeared. You didn't see anything, hear anything or felt anything but him. "I want to know you in a deeper level." He answered. "We've been friends, neighbors and acquiantances our entire lives. I think it's time to take this relationship to the next level. If you wish I would love to be more than just your friend." Miss James feels like fainting. On the other hand Mr. Oxford, Miss James former love, thinks constantly about Miss James. He sees her enjoying the company of Mr. Williams and feels a huge amount of regret. At the same time, he sees her happiness and the improvements she had made for herself. He feels proud of her. One day Mr. Oxford had the opportunity to talk to Mr. Williams while the ladies enjoyed photographing one another in their beautiful garments. "Miss James is a wonderful woman." Mr. Oxford says. Mr Williams turns towards Mr. Oxford and observes the shimmer in his eyes and how his face emanates a sense of kindness and warmth as he has never seen in him before. "But if I may speak plainly, you have no idea what you are getting yourself into." Mr. Oxford adds. Mr. Williams instantly replies: "I'm well aware of your relations with the lady, Sir, and your intentions are very clear. But I must remind you that YOU are her past, while I am her future." Mr. Oxford is astonished at this cruel accusation and says: "Do not get me wrong, I just wanted to let you know..." Mr. Williams quickly interrupts: "I don't want to hear what it is you wish to let me know." "Take good care of her." Mr. Oxford declares firmly. "Whatever amount of pain you may cause her, I will make sure you feel it twice." "Don't worry Mr. Oxford, I will never hurt her." Mr. Williams confidently replies. "Those were the exact same words I said in the past." Mr Oxford answers and walks away... From afar Ms. Wellington observed them trying to decifer that matter that the gentlemen were discussing enthusiastically. ................................................ After hearing Mr. Williams declaration, Miss James simply breaths. She thinks of all her successful relationships and all the betrayals as well. But she decides she won't let her past disappointments influence her decision. She learned from those experiences and wanted to move on. Mr. Williams seemed like the perfect man to do so. Mr. Williams was getting nervous with her silent meditation. At the same time he understood her hesitation and was willing to wait and not pressure her. "Miss James you don't have to answer now. You can think about it and whenever you are ready, you know where to find me." Mr. Williams smiled confidently. He gave her a small kiss on her cheek, a hug and bid farewell. Miss James was more than just surprised. She never thought she could find a man that would sweep her off her feet and be willing to wait for her. He understood her fears and it was very pleasing. "A man that cares and understands? There are very few left. A rare species indeed." Miss James thought to herself. Ms. Wellington walked in and asked what happened. Miss James explained. Ms. Wellington asked: "What are you going to do?" "I know exactly what I am going to do." Miss James leaves the room. As she walks towards Mr. Williams house, Mr. Oxford walks towards Ms. Wellington's. Miss James notices that his final destination will be Ms. Wellington's house, her lifetime best friend and decides to turn back and follow Mr. Oxford. She hides behind a tree and see Mr. Oxford walk in very pleasantly. Miss James quickly runs towards the entrance and without knocking, walks in. And there they were Mr. Oxford and Ms. Wellington kissing. Miss James is destroyed. Every single fear she ever had became true in that very moment. Ms. Wellington sees her and Mr. Oxford turns back and sees Ms. James' face. There aren't enough words to describe the anger, the pain and the sorrow Miss James was experiencing in that very moment. At the same time everything fell into place. She understood Ms. Wellington insistence on her accepting Mr. Williams. And she understood Mr. Oxford pride and lack of patience. Her best friend betrayed her and was the source of Miss James disappointments. Ms. Wellington was the main reason why Mr. Oxford never spoke to Ms. James, never asked for forgiveness and never wanted to admit his great loss. Now at that very second there was no more hope left for Miss James and Mr. Oxford. He knew she would never forgive him and she knew she would never forget the lies and deceit of her very best friend. Mr. Oxford realizes he lost the woman of his dreams, the only one who understood him, accepted him and loved him exactly the way he was without expecting him to change, without expecting anything in return but love. He lost an extraordinary woman who was willing to give her life for him. The woman who made him laugh and inspired him to become a better man. He realized he had tried to replace Miss James with Ms. Wellington, a woman who was manipulative, hypocritical and ruthless. In those few seconds, Miss James lost her best friend, realized she made the right decision by breaking up with Mr. Oxford and was happy that he didn't give her another chance. Now all of Miss James questions were answered and she reasoned that since she survived all her bad experiences until now, she was sure she was going to overcome Ms. Wellington's betrayal. "Miss James! I can explain." Ms. Wellington screamed. "Yes, please don't get the wrong idea." Mr. Oxford added. Miss James only said: "There is no need, it is all perfectly clear. Excuse me." She left heartbroken, feeling like a complete fool never even imagining this would happen to her. Being in disbelief and trying to figure out how come she didn't notice before. Of course Mr. Oxford never wanted to talk badly about Ms. James to Mr. Williams. He only wanted to tell him what was going on with her best friend. He started seeing Ms. Wellington after he broke up with Ms. James. Now how he wanted to get out of this situation and win Ms. James back. But he realized it is way too late. Miss James meditated carefully in the series of events that just unfolded. She went back to her history, the past experiences that make up the woman she is today, and realized her own blindness towards her very best friend, the woman whom she had trusted, and believed. Quite a few times she ignored her gut, that basic instinct that we have humans posses to discern whether someone is being real or fake. She learned to trust herself more and base her decisions not on the opinion or the approval of others but on hers, the reasons that left her feeling satisfied and content. Mr. Williams heard Miss James' ordeals and wasn't sure whether he should contact her or not, give her his loving support. A few weeks pass by. One day Mr. Williams receives a surprise visit from Miss James herself. He was expecting her to look less ravishing, sad, even depressed. After all having your lifetime best friend betray you with your boyfriend isn't the greatest news in the world. This time Miss James had a particular glow he had never seen before, she seemed more relaxed than usual, freer. "How are you today my dear Mr. Williams?" As she walks closer to him, looking at him straight in the eyes and playing with her curly hair. "I'm doing very well, thanks, how are you feeling?" Mr. Williams answers, smiling at Miss James term of endearment. "I'm doing good. I'm sure you've heard the latest." Mr. Williams says: "No I have not heard, I've heard some news, but not the latest." "Mr. Oxford and Ms. Wellington are getting married." Miss James replies. Mr. William was shocked, not at the news, but at Miss James calmness when she spoke. He wondered if she was hiding her true feelings as she usually does. "I can assure you, Mr. Williams, I'm still surprised. I never thought that they would be a couple given our past relationships. Even though I am hurt, I have resolved in my heart not to suffer for those who are undeserving of my pain." "That is a really good resolution I might say, but..." Miss James interrupted Mr. Williams. "I'm sorry for interrupting you, but I didn't come here to talk about them. I came here to talk about us." Mr. Williams never enjoyed being interrupted, but this interruption had been the most pleasant of his life. "You said you wanted to know me in a deeper level, what did you mean by that? How deep?" Miss James asks. Mr. Williams says: "As deeply as any human being can. I want to be your lover, your friend, your counselor, your protector, the shelter you run to, that person that makes you laugh, I want to be your everything, of course only if you want it." Miss James smiles with excitement and yells: "Well of course I want it!" As she tries to compose herself for she is literally melting at the sound of Mr. Williams words. She adds: "I have waited all my life to find a man who was willing to love a woman with all his might, his strength and his power. I finally found you. I know my wait has been worthwhile and most of all I will not be the woman of your dreams, I will be your reality." Mr. Williams just grabs Miss James and kisses her. From then on Ms. James and Mr. Williams enjoyed a real relationship. Not one based on superficial infatuation. It was a love that took time and determination. Little by little all the layers were uncovered. After a while, on a usual day, Mr. Williams and Ms. James were walking on the beach. As they watched the sunset together, Mr. Williams kneels down and proposes. Nothing out of the ordinary. A simple proposal done with his entire heart. At the end of the day that is what every woman wants, a honest man that loves her for what she is with no games, no hesitation and no lies. After enjoying a gorgeous wedding Mr. Williams and Mrs. Williams (the former Miss James) begin the trying journey of marriage with it's many blessing and responsibilities. A few years later Mrs. Williams starts experiencing common symptoms. She gets headaches, nausea and feels dizzy. Like every other married woman she immediately thinks she is pregnant. She panicked for a second. She wanted children later on. But at the same time she rejoiced at the idea of conceiving a child with her wonderful husband. After telling her suspicions to her man, they go to the doctor only to discover that she is not with child. Tests are done. Everything comes back fine but her health deteriorates even more. They travel outside the country to get a second opinion. Mr. Williams nightmare becomes a reality. She had a terminal illness. They were both devastated. Treatment didn't work. Mrs. Williams had only a few months left. They both decided to go back to their home country and spend her last days in the good company of her family and friends. No one has ever seen such an amazing display of love as the one Mr. Williams showed to his dear wife. He lived for her. Their last months together were their happiest times. Mrs. Williams had no regrets except not being able to bear children, leave a legacy in the world, someone to take care of her beloved husband once she was gone. Mrs. Williams expresses her concern. "I will be fine. I would've loved a child. But imagine the pain of being raised up without his mum. Besides I would never forget you. You will always live on. You have been more than my blessing. I will never be as happy as I am now with you." Mr. Williams calmly whispered in his wife's ear. Mrs. Williams weeps softly and was only able to say: "I feel the exact same way. I love you and I'm sorry I can't stay." As Mrs. Williams life fades away they keep holding hands. Mr. Williams holds her tight, never wanting to let go. He kisses her slowly and she takes her last breath. This is the end of the story of Miss James. By: Yessy ©©©© Publication Date: February 5th 2010 https://www.bookrix.com/-meelajames
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-dianna-j-torres-deceased-with-a-chance-love/
Dianna J. Torres Deceased With a Chance @ Love My eyes were closed I didn’t want to open them because it felt as if I had dirt in them. What happened? I got up and I was laying on a fluffy thing. It looked like a cloud and there was a huge golden gates. Surrounding a lot of clouds, I walked up to the gate and there was a man with white wings and a gold aura. “Uhh excuse me, where am I?” I looked down at myself and I was wearing my short skirt, and my Elmo shirt. “You my darling are dead!” The man said opening the gate so he could see me better. “What? How can I be dead I…..I can’t even remember how I died.” “Would you like to see it?” I was confused but I went along with what the man had said. He got out a white ball. He smashed it onto the cloud and white smoke arose and a video was starting to appear in front of a cloud. It showed how I went to the store to get my moms prescription pills for her diabetes, and high blood pressure. I took a long way home, I couldn’t remember why I did. Then I took a turn and a semi made a turn too close to my side of the road and it hit the front of my truck. The dodge ram 1500 hit the curb and my emergency bag protected me from hitting the steering wheel. Sadly, that didn’t save me from the glass breaking. I saw my blood sliding down my face it hit my shirt and my head rested peacefully on the wheel. My arms were dangling next to my legs. This was too much I didn’t even remember this, which was weird because most deceased do remember according to the man at the gate. “So….so…I…I….I’m dead?” I asked not believing this distraught news. “I’m afraid so, but look on the bright side. No more feeling pain on earth or for that girl, oh what’s her name.” The man skimmed through a clipboard that apparently had my info. “Alex.” I said. “Oh yes Alex duh, that’s the good news.” “But what about my family, my friends, my education?” “Girl you don’t need an education here in heaven. You were created for a reason and that reason is to love God. So do you?” The man leaned into me. “Of course I do. But,” “No buts, here are the rules you can’t get into heaven because you have unfinished business and your soul is not clean. So I recommend you meet up with,” He whistled with his fingers between his lips. That’s when Amanda, Brandon, Devon, and my baby sister showed up. “Ahh ha you know them well except for Devon but you know them anyways. Okay so I’m going to jet because I have other people to talk to about their second chances to enter heaven. So I leave you in the hands of these amazing mentors. Peace!” Then the man disappeared. I didn’t even find out his name? “Hi Dianna it’s been a long time huh?” She walked to me and hugged me. She looked beautiful wore her white robe, and the halo. She told me that all she needed was her wings and she would be done. “Thanks cool.” I said. “Hey Dianna I never talked to you but thank you for worrying about me.” I smiled and he gave me a hug too. I then said your welcome. Devon was next he also said thank you for praying for him and then shook my hand which was a bit weird but it happens. Then Amanda gave me my baby sister. She was asleep, covered by a white cloth, little wings and her halo. “God suggested we get her these little buggers.” Amanda pointed to the little wings. She was so black it was hard to believe she was my little sister. Amanda and everyone else were standing on a cloud, they told me to follow them so I did. We soon showed up in front of the football game that I never got the opportunity to go to. Things happen for a reason right. Brandon said “Okay so you have about 5 days to finish all of your business, it isn’t that hard but for your people it’ll be a awkward thing.” “What why?” “Just listen we’ll explain later.” said Devon. “Anyway,” said Amanda “you can talk to people well, technically you can talk to the one person you never wanted to talk to. That person will be your only hope.” Devon then said “Here you go.” He gave me a bag. “What is this?” I retorted. “It’s dust if your ever in need of our assistance just through it in the air. Oh yeah don’t leave it laying around because if a human gets a hold of it that will not be good consequences. Okay?” “Uhh yeah okay.” I said nodding. Brandon said “Alright we are dropping you off here because the person you need is here. Remember, listen to your heart. And it will all work out fine.” “Uhh okay. Thanks I think?” “Yes of course and don’t waste the dust.” Amanda said holding her hands out to me to give her my sister. She was so little and she didn’t even get a name. That’s what I found out as soon as I became of age and realized that I may not have existed had my 3rd oldest sister died. “Bye guys and thanks I’ll see you eventually.” “Bye!” They all said except my baby sister of course. The grass seemed greener than before I died. The sky was all dark, as in pitch black and the only visible light came from the football field that was at the top of the hill. Memories flooded back to when my back then ex Jason tried to kiss me when we were heading to the school. Ewwww so gross actually I was glad that I told him hell no. But eww that day will always haunt me when he kissed me on my birthday! Eww super gross his face was pale white he had acne on his cheeks. Just gross to say in nicer words. I looked up at the top of the hill, I couldn’t believe I was here again, first I find out I’m dead and I return to the place I never wanted to come back to. High school West Noble to be exact. Too much shit happened here, I wish I had never done the things I did. Now, it’s just too late I hate it but I can’t do anything about it of course. I looked down then up and started to walk up the steep hill. I should have been tired but obviously I wasn’t. I reached the gate and there was a lady taking tickets. Wow, I just walked past her, I saw the theatre table selling baked goods. Some of it was good others not so much, other than that it wasn’t so bad. I headed to the fence that blocked the fans from the filed a good 30 feet. I remember that Tyler Clark started to call me cupcake on the field about the time homecoming was on for powder puff. I think? I can’t remember anymore my memory is starting to become fuzzy. I looked up at the bleachers so many people that I knew were sitting up there, crap too bad no one could see me. Until, I locked eyes with one person, the biggest mistake I had ever made in my whole human life Alex Landeros. Shit it was as if she could see me? That made me feel awkward so I just looked away I walked to the other end of the bleachers, looked around and nothing. Oh well, I thought it could have been worse. I walked back to where I locked eyes with the biggest mistake of a person Alex. I looked to where she was sitting but she wasn’t there, thankfully. I looked down and stopped at the fence just to watch the game a little. The chargers scored, I jumped in excitement remembering that no one could see me anyways. I looked around and the coast was clear. I went through a blonde girl, then someone staring me down at the concession stand. It was her Alex, shit. I hoped inside of me that she wasn’t “the one” as Devon, Brandon, and Amanda talked about. I stared her down too until I saw something in the sky, it was the clouds, at night? Why could I see them, I saw words that said “it’s her!” then they quickly faded I hope that it wasn’t a sign for me. Alex walked up to me and said “It’s you, it really is isn’t it?” I looked at her and said “Forget you!” I took a step forward and my hands went to her stomach, I couldn’t walk through her. ‘Oh shit!’ Was my thought I had to walk around her and headed towards the hill, so I could walk away. Alex came running down the hill saying “Why can I see you?” My first reaction was to ignore, ignore, ignore. But I couldn’t so I said ‘Your imagining this. This is not real.’ She closed her eyes and I ran towards the front of the school with her in the middle of the road. With her eyes closed. Now that was funny. I went to go sit on the grass that lead to us33. I was going to miss the dramatic world. “Hey girl what is your prob?” She said walking towards me. With her hands in her pockets. I bent my knees and laid my head in between them. I sat there wondering why it had to be her. “Hey girl I’m talking to you.” I lifted my head and yelled “Yeah well I’m not! So go back to the game and ignore this situation that we in. Oday.” I rested my head between my legs. “How ‘bout we don’t ignore this and you just tell me whats goin on?” I lifted my head. “I can’t okay. Just freaking walk away Alex. Please.” I stood up and headed to the side of where Mrs. Gibbons room would be. My hands rested on my head. I felt like punching the wall knowing I would probably just go through it, I didn’t do it. Alex yelled all the way from where I had sat down and ran to me saying “I can’t cuz fo a reason I’m here and I would like to no. Ya no.” “No Alex I don’t know. Okay all I can say is…is this. I’m dead and you’re the one even after me being dead I still have the same feelings for you. Even though people kept telling me that you were or wait are a hoe, and all this other shit okay. And I will never be able to fucking forget you okay! God why did it have to be you of all the billions of people in the world it had to be you. Right!” I slid down the wall, I hated this bad things really did always happen to me. Of course I have that type of bad luck with things. I always thought it was Karma but I’m not sure anymore. “I’m sorry dat I can see you Dianna okay I’m sorry. It ain’t my fault that, you fell in love wit me. And dat you died if it was up to me, I would of taken your place but na, das not how God wants it so here you is. Right so what do ya need from me girl?” “I told you I do not know. Ya know?” I mimicked the last two words as if she had said them. “Okay okay I’ll talk normal that can really get annoying.” Her arms were tight to her side and her hands were in her pockets. “So what do we do now?” I looked up at her and said, “Honestly. I have no idea but I think I know how you can start to help me.” “How?” She asked. I touched the grass next to me and she sat next to me. “Okay so you know who my cousin is right?” “Yeah didn’t everyone?” I smiled. “Yeah kinda. Anyway, you have to bring him to the middle of the hill. I’ll be laying down looking up at the stars but when he tries to leave tell him I here. Okay.” Alex looked confused. “What he’s never going to want to talk to me. He hates me along with all of your friends remember?” “Yeah what’s your point?” I said with a smile on my face. “The point is that he is not going to want to talk to me let alone see me. Are you being serious right now? You want me to talk to someone that hates my guts?” “Mhhhm” I made a sad face and said “Please it’ll be the one thing I’ll actually appreciate.” “Fine, fine, is this going to help me get into heaven?” “I don’t know I bet it depends on how bad you’ve been, and from what people used to tell me. You weren’t such a good girl.” “Yeah I know.” Alex looked over at me, her hat was to the side and her hands were now near my leg. I looked over to her and saw that she stared at me. “What? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” I laughed but Alex didn’t. “Hey I was just kidding girl. Hey,” I ran my hand in front of her face she didn’t even blink. “Alex okay your scaring me a little.” I pushed myself up that’s when Alex got up and her hand touched my cheek. I looked at her as if I couldn’t look away. Even after death, I felt my cheeks turn red. Her other hand rested on my hip. Alex’s stomach touched mine that’s when her lips reached mine. I felt her blood through her lips. Her warmth found it’s way through me. I felt every nerve in my body tingle. Was that even normal? Maybe not because for a long time I wasn’t normal. Actually I never was normal. Hmm, weird. I pushed myself away and said “Alex what the hell are you doing?” Alex looked up at me and her fingers traced her lips. “I kissed you that’s what I was doing.” “Well don’t do that ever again. It’s wrong and people will think you’ve gone crazy.” “I don’t really give a shit. Can I kiss you again?” Her hand moved away from her lips. “No, Alex it’s wrong. I’m technically not even here.” she moved closer to me then I pushed her away. “Just go please do me this one favor for me. It’s the least you can do, don’t you think?” “No I don’t think so. Kiss me and I’ll do it.” She moved closer to me, I took a step back. I looked up at the stars and wondered why? “Fine but if I do this you’re going to talk to him right?” “Yep.” “Fine.” I slid my hand under her chin and kissed her. I moved my hands and held them behind her neck. Her hands were at my waist. I broke away and moved my head, then kissed her again. I bit her lip and pushed my lips to hers. I broke my grip and stepped back. I licked my lips and rested my hands on my side and said “Now go I have to get this done because I only have so long.” “Okay a promise is a promise.” Alex held her hand out I took it and she pulled me toward her and kissed the corner of my lips. Damn it her kisses taunted me so much. Even though, I could be hurt but it seemed to me now that she really did change she has. “You love my kisses. I know you do. I can feel it in my soul. That’s if I even have one.” Her hands fell down to her sides. “Alex you do. Don’t be like that. Who said you don’t?” My hand reached to her shoulder. “My family, Jessica, and my grandma.” her words came out as if with shame. “Ohh…well maybe I can change your grandma’s mind but I can’t change your family’s mind. Or the hoe’s mind. Eww just thinking about her makes me queasy.” I had a thought in mind. “What if we go see where your grandma? Where was she last at? I could talk to her and maybe that could bring peace to her soul.” Alex’s eyes raised up, “Would you really do that for me? After all you’ve been through? aren’t you supposed to be working on your unsolved missions.” “Yeah of course, I have to do my thing but, you also have to think about her what if this is the reason she hasn‘t crossed over.” I said sternly. “So uhh, where was the last place your grandma was at?” Alex thought and said “Her house, and the hospital but she never liked the hospital. She found it depressing and gray.” “Alright to your grandma’s house.” Chapter 2 Either this works or not, but we have nothing to loose, besides our love. I arrived upon Alex’s house there was darkness, but that may have been because it was night outside and there was no light in sight. Alex’s car came to a slow stop. She got and I just shook my head to the sides at her I was here before her and told her to follow me. I walked through the door but she was getting her keys out. I walked her to the living room, and she sat down her legs wide open as if she had guy junk. I whispered “No one’s here but your grandma is.” Alex sat up straight and I walked to the kitchen I saw Alex’s grandma cutting up carrots, “Penny?” “Get out of my kitchen tell Alex to leave too, I want nothing to do with her.” I gulped and said “Okay but Alex said that she is sorry for being her and trying to better herself. You know what she’s been through?” Penny wiped her brow and said “Yeah whoring around like she’s going to be young forever? Drinking smoking, cheating? Yeah I think I know.” I thought about it and let it all go. “Well yeah, but she’s changed.” “Really?” Penny looked up and stabbed the knife onto the board cutter. “Ask her what she did, before the game, or this morning. Oh and let’s not forget this one, ask her why Yari and her broke up?” Penny took the knife and proceeded cutting. I looked at her and turned around and started to walk out when she said “Good riddance.” I turned around and said “Alright look, it isn’t my fault that Alex wants you to be in peace alright have you ever thought about someone aside from yourself? Don’t you think Alex feels bad for hurting you? She can’t change who she is. Have you ever thought that maybe God made her like this for a reason? And if you hate me fine, but stop wasting my time with all your bullshit because your grand-daughter cares about what happens to you.” I took in a breath and walked out to Alex feeling pissed, but I didn’t say I was I just said “It went great.” After I had gotten done Alex’s grandma walked out and said “No it didn’t.” Alex looked pale white, of course she was already a little white cause she’s a half! But right know she looked so pale, that I couldn’t even see her freckles. “Gra……grandma?” I pulled Alex up and she stood next to me. Not moving not doing anything. “Yes Alexandra it’s me. Honey look I just wanted to say I’m sorry for being mean to you when I was alive, you didn’t deserve it. And I’m sorry you felt like you had to hide being who you are. But now you don’t have to and I love you honey.” Alex just stood there and her grandma walked to her and hugged her. Penny was a little big she had red-ish brown hair had green eyes and chubby wrists. It reminded me of some one but, I’m starting to forget who. I went outside while Alex listened to her grandma because I don’t think Alex was in the talking mood. She’s speechless. I started to walk around the house, because I couldn’t remember my family member’s faces. This was bad, I could only remember Lalo and that was it. A faint light came down in front of me I stopped and saw it was Brandon, Amanda, and Devon. “Hey guys what’s up?” Amanda walked away from the guys and said “Your starting to forget and that’s bad.” Brandon came behind her and said “Pretty soon you won’t be able to remember your mission. You have to get it done.” Devon came beside Amanda and said “I recommend that you get it done ASAP, if not…….” “What? If not what?” My hand came to my lips I started to bite my thumb. “If not you won’t be able to move on. And you’ll get sent to hell.” I gulped and ran those words through my head. I looked all around me. “So what do I do? I’m helping Alex after this she’s going to help me.” Brandon put his arm around me and said “If we could help souls we would but we can’t we’re only supposed to help ourselves to move on, talk to her and tell her to get it done.” Amanda and Devon said “Now.” “Okay okay, I’ll try but this is hard what do I do if something happens? You guys only come when you want to not when I need you.” “Here is this heart, and this crystal ball. You can only use the crystal ball once.” said Devon “So if you use the ball your done fore. Plus you shouldn’t need it unless your done with your mission and your ready to leave. Oh yeah and the heart ball is to affect moods, so if something were to happen use it.” Brandon said. “And if you do use it ahead of when your supposed to, it will shatter and you will roam the earth forever without anyone being able to see you.” “Okay no pressure.” I said “Well,” said Amanda “there is pressure cause it’s your soul at stake. Of course God wants all his children to come home but, you know how people are now a days.” “Yeah I know I’m…..I was one of them, still kind of am. Let’s just say that Alex doesn’t come through?” “What?” Alex said. “Uhh nothing Alex, I was just talking to them.” My hand moved to show where Amanda, Brandon, and Devon were at. “Dianna there’s no one there.” I moved my head sideways and said “They are right here, you can’t see them can you?” Amanda said “She won’t be able to see us unless she feels compassion for others, that’s why she’s scared to be herself. She didn’t tell you did she?” “Tell me what? I moved closer to Amanda. “Dianna what are they saying?” asked Alex with a scared tone. “Shh!” I said. “Ask her why she’s scared and why she can’t see us.” said Brandon sternly. “Just tell me, please.” I implored. “Ask her.” said Devon. “Alex why can’t you see Amanda, Brandon, or Devon?” I walked closer to Alex. “What…what….why are you asking me this?” “They’re saying your not telling me something what is it?” I was inches away from Alex. “I….I do not know what they are talking about?” she gulped that’s how I knew she was lying. That’s when Devon said “She can see us. She chooses not to see us. She’s suppressing back her gift. And she isn’t the only one. Her grandmother had the gift. That’s why she died, spirits entered her body and tore her apart because she refused to help us anymore.” That’s when Alex when by me and yelled “Don’t say that my grandmother was a great grandmother. And you demons killed her, just leave me the fuck alone, I never wanted this for me. So just leave me and my family alone!” Alex walked again past me and into her house without touching the handle the door opened and she entered and closed the door. “So, I guess this means I’m not moving on to the other side even though I kept my part of the deal, huh?” I felt my soul shatter, I felt my feet slowly sink down into this earth. “Dianna we’re sorry we were just trying to help you I guess we should have told you this huh?” Said Amanda putting her arm around me. I fell down and sat on the earth ground, “No it’s okay you guys were just trying to help me. It was your job, but thanks anyway.” “Remember if you need our help you know what to do.” Brandon said. “Yeah I guess.” Chapter 3 I’m sorry but it’s my duties, either I move on or stay forever. I walked around Alex’s house and every time I would walk past Alex’s kitchen window I would feel electricity strike me, in a painful miserable way. After walking around the house about 30 times because I kept track I went to Alex’s door and knocked. No one answered so I tried to walk in and I couldn’t step through. I got off the porch and ran to the door, and I got through but I was pinned to the ground and I felt as if electricity went through my body I felt as if I was being killed. I yelled out in pain for a minute when Alex walked into the living room and said “I didn’t want to do this. All I wanted was to help you move on but you had to make it hard.” My lungs felt as if they were going to explode, all I could seem to do is scream. Scream out in pain. I felt one last jolt and I lost consciousness. I do not know how I could pass out I’m dead this is just my soul but it did happen and it hurt like never before. I woke to the smell of a cigarette smell. I took in a breath and coughed, my lungs hurt, I wish I could drink water but it may just go right through me. That made me smile, I heard someone walk in I opened my eyes and Alex stood over me staring me down. She asked “Why did you have to die? Why did you have to leave your home? Why did you have to choose me?” MY smile fell from my face and I said in a raspy voice “I didn’t choose you…….God brought me to you.” I blinked slowly. Alex sat down next to me when I actually looked away from her I saw that I was in a little room, barely enough room for a bed and a dresser. Alex had her hand to her lips, “look I’m sorry about what I did but, it’s just I didn’t want what the ghosts did to my grandma to happen to me. And I was scared if I let you in you would take over me you know?” I moved my head up and down but it hurt to move, even my lips it hurt to move. I sucked it in and tried not to cry but tears rolled down my cheeks. They felt as if they weighed a thousand pounds. But in reality they were just little droplets. My hand moved out away from my side and I reached to touch her, she flinched but she let me touch her cheek. My hand fell down and I closed my eyes. It felt like she was going to leave because it sounded as if she had gotten up. I then felt warmth touch my forehead, I then heard Alex say “I’m sorry for hurting you. But everything I said I meant and, I would never lie to you about that.” I opened my eyes and smiled with my eyes I closed them again. That’s when I felt my lips set fire, I opened my eyes and Alex was kissing me. I closed them and I raised my arm to wrap it around her neck. I felt her hand touch my leg, it brought peace to me and also it scared me. I had done wrong when I was alive. Now that I was dead I was doing even more wrong then before. Her lips collided with mine as if they were a perfect fit, nothing could separate them. At least that’s what it felt like. My hand touched her Mohawk, she buzzed the sides of her head and she had a Mohawk running down her head. If I didn’t know any better I would say she was a guy. But, she wasn’t and she could now never be with me, because I’m dead and she’s still living. Alex’s grandma walked in that’s when I just gave up Alex kept kissing me and I just lost interest. Alex stopped looked at the doorway and saw her grandmother so angry. “Alex you said you weren’t letting her in?” Her grandmother’s arms crossed over her chest. “She’s the only girl I’ve felt right being with, don’t mess this up for me.” “But she’s dead you can never be with her!” “Your dead too but your still here! That hasn’t stopped you from letting me find happiness.” Alex moved away from me and stood in front of her grandmother and said “Now I think your mission is done grandma.” That’s when her grandmother’s face looked scared and she slowly turned invisible all I heard was “I’m sorry baby I love you please don’t,” and that was it. I moved the blanket from my body and asked “Alex where is she?” “She’s in the purgatory.” She smirked as if she did this all the time. I gasped and said “Are you serious?” “Yeah.” she said it as if she was powerful. “How did you do it? I guess you really didn’t want anything to do with us souls huh?” I bit my lip a little bit. Grandma taught me how to do it when I was about 10. She saw spirits contacting me since the day I was born, and I gave my mom a hell of a time when I was a baby.” She laughed “Anyway I’m supposedly gifted so I guess that had a hole lot to do with it. I don’t actually like have control. I just wish for it to happen and things just fall into place.” I slowly sat up and I looked at Alex and asked. “Did you wish for me to die?” Alex gulped her hands now moved to the inside of her pockets, she avoided eye contact and she said “Sometimes I did. I guess I never thought how much I really needed you, until I lost you and this time it’s for good. I guess I wanted to hurt you……but in reality, I ended up hurting myself because of the love I had for you.” Alex moved towards me and sat next to me. “Oh.” I said, I desperately needed something but I had no idea what. Alex’s hand reached my cheek, “Dianna I never wanted to hurt you, it was an accident. I know I was being selfish by wanting you not to breath but, I hurt myself in the end.” I looked away and said “It doesn’t matter Alex. The only way you can help me it’s if you finish my tasks that I didn’t get to do. Alex I beg you to tell my parents about me or at least get my cousin’s attention for me.” The last words came out as if I had a dry mouth. “Here you need this.” Alex handed me a cup that had a clear liquid, with a plant on top. I drank it down and it burnt my throat I ignored the pain and chugged it down. Alex then said “Whoa there careful it’s only supposed to heal you not drunken you.” I laughed and asked “What was that?” Alex smiled and said “That was Smirnoff with a little leaf from the white tree. I burped and replied “Sorry. So your saying that you just gave me vodka?” Alex just nodded. “Are you freaking serious? This is illegal for you. Your underage.” “Says the girl that’s dead, and besides I’m older than you.” She got the bottle from beside the bed and drank it. “Alex you know I hate it when you drink. It doesn’t look good on you and are you going to help me or not. I only have 3 days now please.” Alex drew the bottle away from her lips. Her eyes looked at me and I loved them so much her freckles had a soft spot in my heart. Her lips were the perfect size and red. And her hair. Why is it so wrong to be bisexual, gay, and lesbian. You can’t change who the people are. It’s not usually people’s fault they are the way they are. God wants people for who they are. “Alex I love you so much.” I through myself at her like never done before. She dropped the bottle, luckily she had carpet for the ground and she had already put the lid on the bottle. Alex just sat there while I pressed my whole body to hers. My knees hit her right leg that’s when she turned and hugged me. Her wait was to mine, my breast were to hers, I never felt more happier in my life. But, I also felt as if I was betraying God. I kissed her that’s when I felt Alex’s hand reach under my shirt. I pushed away and said “Alex I can’t do that with you. Even though I want to it’s against my morals. I can never betray God like that.” Alex just licked her lips and said “I understand Dianna it’s cool. Right ok so let’s go find your cousin. You have to get done with this so you can rest in peace.” Alex broke away from me, she grabbed the bottle and walked out of the room. I sat on the bed and kept going over and over in my mind why I had almost done something with Alex. I’m pretty sure doing that with her was wrong because I’m dead and she needs someone that can love her forever. Maybe I can look for her girl so she can be happy. I walked out of the room and Alex had already finished the bottle and she opened a new one this time the new one was twice as big. I walked up to her and grabbed the bottle, “Alex stop your going to drug yourself with this. I can see your killing your soul.” “Good I want to be dead so we can be together forever.” I gasped and stepped back letting go of the bottle. “Alex are you fucking serious right now! Do you think I wanted all of this to happen? I had my future planned out, I wanted to live in the adult world. You are almost done and you want to end it, because you suddenly decided that you love me? That ain‘t going to fly with me. I‘m sorry but this isn‘t going to work out at all.” I walked out the front door, I reached an alley when I heard a car’s engine start up and follow me. I reached my grandparent’s house. I walked past their house and went straight on the road that would eventually lead me to my cousin’s house which was in front of my house. I walked through a building hoping she wouldn’t see me then. I reached my house and their was a car outside my house it was Alex’s house she had the bottle still in her hand. I shoved the bottle from her hand and pulled her to Lalo’s house. She knocked but she was unbalanced. When Lalo opened the door she straightened up and said “I need to talk to you.” Chapter 4 It’s now or rest in Peace. Lalo looked at Alex in disgust and said “We have nothing to talk about you broke my cousin’s heart that’s why she’s dead, and your drunk so just go the hell home.” Lalo slammed the door. Alex knocked again, and my cousin wouldn’t open it. So I went inside and got in Lalo’s body and walked him to the door so he would open it. Alex stood there, looking at Lalo. I jumped out and said “Tell him.” “Hey Lalo Dianna wants to ask you for forgiveness.” “What are you talking about?” Lalo spat out. “She’s right in front of you and you can’t see your own cousin?” Alex looked at Lalo with eyes of despair. Surely he felt something? “I have no idea what you are talking about and even if it was true about my cousin being here. I’m sure that she wouldn’t want to be anywhere near you.” Lalo started to close the door, when Alex put her foot in the door. “Alright look. I don’t want to be here as much as the next person but, if it’s going to help Dianna move on to the nest stage after dying then it’s for the best so help me to help her. Please we’re her only hope.” Alex moved her foot from the door. Lalo opened the door all the way and said “How do I know your not lying!” I looked at Alex and said “Tell him that Gigi is a prissy little bitch and that I hope he ends up falling down the stairs.” Alex did exactly that in the exact words that I said it. Lalo’s jaw dropped and I told Alex to go and get his kitchen vodka, behind the fridge. She did, Alex sat down and handed it over in that moment I had never seen Lalo drink so much vodka since that one day when his sister threw him a birthday party when he turned 15. He had drank so much he peed himself it was funny since the party was in the basement and he couldn’t even go up the stairs. “Oh shit it really is her isn’t it?” Alex nodded and Lalo drank again from the bottle. “Shit I guess since you know she hated you and I just assumed.” I jumped in and said “Tell him not to assume cause when he assumes you make an ass out of you and me.” Alex glared at me and said “No I’m not telling him that.” “What?” Said Lalo “Dianna wants me to tell you about the assume thing.” “Oh yeah I remember that. Cuz not even since your death do you have good comebacks.” My hands came to my hips I jumped in front of Lalo and smacked his cheek, that’s when I saw Lalo fall back onto the couch. I thought what is going on. “Oh what the hell? Oh shit cuz?” I stood there looking at Lalo I felt like he could see me. “Dude she’s standing right in front of me!” He stuck his hand out to me as if I was fake or something. His hand hit my stomach and said “Owwww, I may be dead but I felt that!” My mouth fell open and I repeated “I felt that prime!” I threw myself onto my cousin’s shoulder’s and I could feel him. His heart beating super fast, and his hands were not even close to me. “Bro oh my goodness you have no idea how happy I am to feel you right now!” I smiled then pulled away, that’s when Lalo fell onto the ground luckily he let go of the bottle and Alex caught it while I saw my cousin fall to the ground. Somehow Alex got Lalo onto his couch, I smacked him around a little bit until I saw his eyes open huge. Then close again, I went to the kitchen and got water I ran to him and splashed some on his face. I smacked him and said “Hey! Wake up!” He did. I sat him up and sat next to him. “Bro you have no idea how glad I am to see you. I saw you at the game.” I paused wasn’t impressed but it’ll do. So how have you been?” Lalo almost passed out again, when I smacked him again and he said “Stop hitting me.” I retorted “Well stop fainting like a panzy.” “I do not faint! And I’m not a panzy.” He took the water bottle from the table. I smiled and said “Whatever velvety flower! Anyway you didn’t answer me how are you?” Lalo put his face into his hands. “How do you think prime? I don‘t have you here anymore how am I supposed to get over you know who?” My jaw fell open and I said “What are you kidding me? You knew I wasn’t going to live forever you puss. I told you, I’m not immortal and this proves it. Besides I thought you said you were over and done with that.” “Well actually I was until I saw them in the hallway and….actually I’m not very comfortable talking about this in front of her.” I stood. “So you lied to me? I thought we were closer than that?” I completely ignored his comment but what really mattered at this moment was that my own bro lied to me. What am I a deceased person that isn’t worthy of knowing the truth? Well kind of but that isn’t the point the point is he’s a liar and a trader. “I didn’t lie and I really don’t want to talk about this now.” “Alright first of all, Aledx isn’t even listening she’s texting and listening to her ipod secondly,” I walked over to Alex and took the bottle away from her, and yanked the headphones from her ears. “No drinking your driving home remember?” Alex stood up and said “Doesn’t matter, it’s not like it matters anyway if I die. I die big whoop.” I pushed her down on to where she was sitting and said “Are you kidding me? Do you really want to end up like me…..or worse in hell?” Alex stood up again and now pushed me back and said “Don’t matter heading there anyway.” Her attitude was making me so mad, that I almost hit her but I just stepped away and focused on my cousin. I looked over at Alex and said in the most adult voice I could, “I hate you.” I looked back at Lalo and said “Alright now where were we? Oh yeah, well unless you want to end up like me I suggest that you just try to get over yeah.” Alex grabbed the bottle drank from it I basically jumped to her and took it away and said “Alex stop! Your not meant to die now. You could be so much better. Your such a fucking child. Stop acting like this, your going to get yourself killed you idiot.” Before I could stop myself these words spilled out like boulders, falling off of a cliff. What the crap was I thinking I have no idea. All I know is that Alex walked out of the house and drove off. I sat next to Lalo and said “I really fucked up big time didn’t I?” I looked at the bottle then took a long sip. Lalo pushed the bottle down and said “She’s just sad like the rest of us, did you know that She’d dumped Viky after you died?” “What?” I sat there for minutes while he told me this story how he was dating Viky and then after I died she stopped going to school then, she dumped her. I didn’t even know they were dating. Well I did but I didn’t know that Alex had dumped her. Why would she crap, I forgot Alex does care about me now. Crap! I stood up and said “Bro I have to go, I have a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. I think it’s Alex, I do need a favor from you though, I think it’s the last thing I was supposed to get done.” “Sure sis, anything.” My skin tingled every time he called me sis. I think me and him were destined to be brother in sister or something. “I need you to tell my parents about me being you know. Bisexual, tell them that I said I love them and that it wasn’t there fault I was just born like this. Tell them it was Alex who I love.” Lalo smiled and said “No prob prime.” I hugged him, while he sat down and I responded “I love you.” He whispered and I felt his body shake as he said “I love you too.” I broke away and walked through his house door. I looked everywhere through the yard but Alex’s car was not back. It was dark now, I could feel like Alex needed my help, but I didn’t know where she was at? I saw light coming down and I saw Amanda floating towards me. “She’s dying.” Amanda said she was by herself. Chapter 5 Would you give up your life for the girl you love? “What?” I retorted. Amanda repeated “Alex is dying. So I suggest that you say your goodbyes to her because she’s going to die and go down there!” Amanda pointed down to the ground. “No Amanda no she can’t go down there no her please she needs one more chance Amanda she can change please. Just give her one more chance.” I felt tears start to climb up to my eyes, my heart started to beat faster and faster, I wanted to fall down to the ground and cry, but I knew I couldn’t. “Amanda where is she?” “She’s where you died.” My heart hurt, I needed her to be alive she didn’t deserve to die. I looked at her and said “I need to save her please take me to her I beg you. Amanda nodded, I went with her, and in millisecond I was on the scene. I ran to Alex, The air bag was on her face, blood was running down her face, the seat belt had saved her but she was loosing too much blood. Glass was everywhere, it scared me it made me wonder if this was how it looked like when I was in the accident. I threw open the door I unbuckled her and moved her face “Alex…..Alex please answer me.” Alex just moaned. “Alex, Alex wake up please don’t die Alex!” I yelled she didn’t move. I could feel her soul was leaving her body slowly. I pulled her out of the car and laid her on the road. I gave her mouth to mouth resuscitation but nothing. I wrapped her in my arms. I started to cry, tears just poured down my face. I whispered “Alex, please breath, don’t die. I need you to live please.” I moved Alex’s face so she looked up at me. Her eyes didn’t open, not even a little. I kissed her forehead and I said “Alex I need you…….I….I love you.” I heard sirens going off. They sounded close but the odds of them saving her was none to none. I looked up to the heavens and I yelled “Why did you have to take her? I love her. Nothing is left for me know.” I looked down at her, my tears fell onto her cheeks, then one fell on her lips. I looked down at her as if she was a child, I lowered my head so my lips were inches from Alex’s lips. My hand braced her head and I kissed her like never before. The sirens were closer, when I slowly started to lower her head down I felt Alex cough and she opened her eyes. “Did you really mean it?” I smiled and said “What?” She replied “That you love me?” Tears rolled out of my eyes and said “Hell yes, more than anything in this world.” Alex grabbed my chin and lowered me down to her lips she whispered “I love you more.” she kissed me when the ambulance showed up, and ran to Alex to strap her down. Her hand was the last thing I felt. Amanda slowly walked up behind me and said “It’s time now, it’s time for you to go.” I nodded because I knew it was over for me now. There was nothing I could do anymore. Amanda’s arm wrapped around me and said “It’s for the best. It was hard on all of us. Especially since, he could have taken her from you.” I saw ourselves looking into the hospital room. Alex looked so peaceful on the bed. The IV in her skin, blood was flowing into her body, it looked painful. Amanda dropped me off in the hospital room she said I would get 5 minutes with her so I could say my goodbyes to her. I took every second, I walked over to her, and sat on the edge of the bed so I touched her leg. She immediately woke up and said “Hey Dianna, I thought you were mad at me?” I could feel tears start to build up, in my body I felt my body quiver but I didn’t want to cry, I bit my lip and said “Me be mad at you? I don’t think I could live a day with being mad at you.” Alex smiled and said “So this isn’t bad huh?” “Well I was mad but when I saw you there I lost everything. I felt like my heart was cut out of my soul and that, I had died again.” Alex moved her body she then sat up with the control. “That sounds intense.” “It was.” I said “It is. Alex why did you leave? I was afraid something like this was going to happen.” Alex rolled her eyes at me. “I was sick of living. What was I supposed to do just live my life with a ghost while I would age and die old?” I took a breath and reached for her hand. “Alex I’m….I wasn’t planning on staying with you forever. These few days have just been to get to the next step after death. I told you that I love you. I have never told anyone that ever, in my whole life.” “But,” I put my finger to her mouth and said. “You were my first love, and heartbreak. I just wanted to tell you that because, now I have to go.” “No Dianna you can’t go I’ll change please don’t leave me here by myself.” “I laid down next to her and said “Alex please don’ ask that of me,” I felt tears build up again and this time I was no longer in control, they slowly slipped down my face. “because” my voice quivered but I continued “I can’t change this. Promise me something.” I looked up at her, my arm wrapped around her stomach, her arm had my head on there and her other arm touched my hip. “Anything,” was her response. I couldn’t bare to say it but I knew I had to, saying the words was going to kill me but it had to be done. “Move on. Don’t stop living your life just because, I can’t be your other half.” “Dianna I ca” Her hand stopped touching my hip and just laid there. “Promise me please.” Alex nodded. My lips were inches from her chin I pushed my self up and I kissed her chin, she moved my head up and I kissed her lips. I was never going to forget the feeling of her lips on me. Soft, moist, perfect size, every time she kissed me she made my body shake, and get Goosebumps. Every time I saw her in the hallway my emotions from the first day I told her I loved her came rushing back. Her bed slowly started to recline down, I kissed her more, her hand now touched my thigh, my leg went around her hip. Her hands touched my stomach and my hips. My hands twisted on her hair, mostly on her mohawk. Her hands, moved up to my waist then my sides then to my ribs, suddenly Amanda tapped on the window. I stopped, I sat on her legs and said “Can you do something for me?” Alex nodded “Can you please be different after this. You would have died, but I…just be better Alex. Live your life and do what you want to do. Be smart, and don’t forget,” I got down off her knees and stepped to the side of her bed. By know Alex was sitting up again. “I will always be in your heart, and I’ll be there when you need me, I’ll listen when you need me to.” Alex pulled my hand and said “I love you more. Don’t forget me.” My body felt like it would fall down and go to the fetal position, that thought left my mind and I pressed hard on her hand, “Never.” I started to walk away when Alex pulled my hand and pulled me to her body, she kissed me hard, not an uncomfortable hard a more painful I’m never going to love again kiss. I felt tears roll down, her cheeks got wet, but she ignored it and kept kissing me. I heard another tap. I stood up and walked when I heard Alex getting up I ran to her and pulled her t the bed. She was standing up and her chest pressed to my chest, her chin inches from mine. I looked at her and said “I love you forever, and ever.” I turned around but I felt I had to do this. My lips collided with hers, our tongues collided that was all we could do. I can’t live but she can. My arms went to her shoulders, her hands touched my back, she pushed me towards the window. My neck moved so much that I felt weak but this would never happen again. I embraced what I had in this moment. I heard Amanda whisper, “Now it’s your turn to live.” That’s when I heard a door slam open. We broke away from each other and Alex saw Viky her ex-girlfriend standing in the door way with flowers in her hand. Viky made an ugly face when she came towards Alex like she was going to slap her. Alex went to her and held her hands up and said “Viky stop it’s over I told you that before.” “Your leaving me for her you fucking,” her hand raised up I ran to Alex and was in the way so Viky wouldn’t hurt Alex. Instead I caught her hand and punched Viky in the nose. She fell to the ground and I said “Don’t hurt her, if you want to start something start it with me don’t be mad at her. Viky stood up pointed at Alex and said “I can’t believe I even went out with you.” She started to walk away when she retorted “See you at school whore!” “Have you looked in the mirror lately?” Viky walked away Alex just stood there astound, one I had punched Viky in the noise and two Viky could see me. “Alright what just happened?” I smiled and said “I am clueless.” “For real. Am I imagining this or is this for real?” Alex looked dizzy so I moved her towards the bed. “Alex how about you relax I’ll be here when you wake up, cause as far as I’m concerned I’m confused too.” Alex held onto my hand and said “Sleep here with me.” I wanted to blush but didn’t “I’ll be here. I will never leave you.” I pulled her hand to my lips I kissed her hand and she held on as if I had told her that I was going down to eat something. “What if you don’t come back.” I felt sadness shadow me and I responded “Alex I swear I will not move from this spot until you tell me I can.” Alex let go of my hand and I moved over to her side. My head rested on her shoulder my hand wrapped around her stomach and I felt her fingers brush my hip. Alex grabbed my face and pulled it up to hers, our lips met and it was like I was on fire. It was as if I had kissed her for the first time again. My body’s response climbing on her. The love for her would never die. I knew it was a good thing, but what if I were to die again? Alex would be in the same spot again I just hope we die together or I die before her. The reason I can’t see her be hurt again. There was silence and she broke it by saying “Dianna do you think we’ll live happily ever after?” I felt shocked I wanted to say yes but down in my heart I felt something else, “The truth?” Alex nodded. “I don’t believe in happily ever after,” Alex touched my face with her hand, with the IV’s in her hand. “I believe in a beautiful ending even after death. Because this life that I have….it’s not long enough to be with you. It only gives me a few years to love.” Alex kissed my nose and my hand rubbed her stomach. “Do you believe in happily ever after’s?” Alex bit her lip, then looked out the window “I believe in you, and God. I may not have been meant to be a saint or something but I know what I was meant to do. My job was to live this life the best I can. With you.” My head rested on Alex’s chest. “I can hear your heart beat.” I laughed, “It’s speeding and slowing at the same time.” I thought I was the only one that got that feeling when I was with her. “I’m only human. That’s what you do to my heart.” I smiled. I grabbed her hand and put it to my chest. “You feel that?” We were quiet for awhile. “Yeah I do.” It feels so awesome. I kissed her soft, pink, perfectly round lips, “How could I be given someone so right and not have anything bad happen to me? Besides dying.” “God’s a giving being. Just sometimes bad things have to happen in order to balance life out.” She sounded so wise so knowing that it surprised me. “Alex’s your so smart why don’t you be the real you? Around your friends you know?” I slid down off her chest and body. To her right. “I don’t know,” you know just sometimes I don’t even realize I’m doin it, ya know?” I laughed and said “yeah.” Our fingers entwined. My lips kept finding their way to Alex’s lips, or cheeks, or they just wanted to touch Alex it’s like it was my first nature. To be with her like breathing was second place, and being with Alex was my priority. “Dianna can I ask you something?” I nodded. Wondering what there was to ask. She cleared her throat a little then catching me by surprise she asked “Will you be my wifey?” Publication Date: February 9th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-dianna23
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-kylie-golden-i-hate-you/
Kylie Golden I Hate You! Prolouge " I hate You. Raise your hands if you have ever told someone that?" Three fourths of the class raised there hands. " Now keep your hand raised if you have ever told your parents that. half the hands stayed raised. " okay put your hands down now. None of you realize now what those words do to a person. i used to say those words all the time to my mother. thoughtlessly, carelessly, oblivious and uncaring to how it would make my mother feel. i thought it she wouldnt care. i know better now. " i took a deep breath, sitting on the desk in front of the class, preparing to tell them my story. this was my first time telling adolescents my story. but they needed to hear it. or they could end up like me. "This" I said, " Is my story." What Started It All, A Stupid Party "I was 14. i walked home, then walked inside to look for my mother after an exciting day at school. " Mom!!!!!" i yelled. " yes sweetie?" she asked walking into the living room. " Can i go to a party tomorrow night with Ryan?" Ryan was my boyfriend. " I don't know sweetie. Your only fourteen. " she said softly. Ryan was a senior, it was a senior party and i was a freshman. " Mom!I'll be fine, I'll be with Ryan! And I won't drink.." 'much' i finished in my head. " I'm sorry, but no. Maybe when your older." I screamed, " Mom You NEVER let me do anything fun!" i screeched. "I'm sorry" She said softly. i was too self-absorbed to see how my words were affecting her. " I hate you!" i spat. i turned around, stalked up the stairs, and slammed my bedroom door behind me. Suicide I walked down the stairs, looking for my mom as i usually did after our fights." Mom!!!" i yelled. No responce. i started to get irritated again.where the hell was she? i stopped my thoughts as i walked in my room, and saw a note on my mirror. me and my mom used to leave notes there,but not anymore as i got older. i picked it up and read it. Taylor, I'm so sorry that i couldn't be the mom you wanted me to be. I love you so much, and i hope you can forgive me. I love you Goodbye with Love, Mom Oh my gosh. Publication Date: December 23rd 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-kbggirl
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-nicole-gonzalez-lost-love/
Nicole Gonzalez Lost Love The Loss of someone Special The Suprise It was a Friday morning at 7:46, when the doorbell rang. "It must be Sandra", I thought. I rushed downstrairs and opened the door. There was Sandra, wearing her dark blue jeans with a black tight longsleve and new dark brown Uggs. She looked pretty with her hair up in a pointy pony tail. I was wearing my hair down, a new one shoulder green shirt, my black jeans, and black flats. Sandra always said she sometimes envied me because I was so pretty. I always complimented her too, but I dont think she really felt pretty. We made our way out the door when Sandra gave me the big news. Guess what? What?, I asked. I sighned you up for the school beauty pageant!, she said. You what?!, I replied. You heard me! ..But...why?, I asked. Well, your like the prettiest and most popular girl at school. Im sure you will win. That was true. Andrea was the most popular girl in school and she looked like a beauty queen. She wasnt the only one though. There was aslo Maddie Wilson. She was one of Andrea's good friends. Suddently Sandra broke the silence again. I also want you to meet someone,she said. Who?, I asked. Just wait and see. This morning was full of suprises! The Wierd Feeling As soon as we got to school, every guy started to wistle and look at us as if we were a new car or something. This was usual. Then we spotted Maddie,Lucy,and Carmen. Then something caught Andrea's attention. It was the guy standing between Carmen and Lucy.Suddenlly Andrea got this weird feeling in her stomach. "Andrea, this is the person I was telling you about", said Sandra. He's my cousin Sergio Zavala and he comes from Texas. "Hi", I said. Im Andrea Perez. He waved back. "Nice to meet you", he replied. Then was a long silence. Just then the school bell for first period rang. I could hardly wait for break. Andrea kept on staring at the clock the whole first and second period. The tenth grade math and science class seemed to go on forever. At least that's what it seemed to Andrea. In break,Andrea found Sandra and Maddie sitting with another group of kids. In that group of kids was Sergio. Andrea got out her pocket mirror and started fixing her hair. She wanted to look fantastic for Sergio. "Hello",I said. Hey!, everyone replied at the same time. " Hey Andrea, there's going to be a welcome party for Sergio tommorow",said Sandra. I really want you to be there. Sure,I replied. She could could hardly wait for tommorow. Once again she took a quick glance and Sergio. Then once again, she got the weird feeling. The Outfit That same day, right after school I went to the mall with my older sister, Alexa. Alexa is 19 years old. She looks more like 20 though. She has the body Andrea once dreamed of having, which now she does have. Andrea also had an older brother named Gorge. They got along the most. When they got to the mall, Andrea went straight to Macys. That is where she always found the best outfits or dresses. Andrea had in mind a tight, short, red dress. She really did want to impress Sergio. She went to the dress section, while Alexa was looking at the perfumes. First she saw a purple short dress, but she didn't really like the color. Then she saw a long red dress, but it was too long. Then she saw it. It was the perfect dress she had in mind. It was the perfect dress. She also got a silver headpiece. She was goign to look beautiful! The Party! On Saturday night, Andrea was getting ready for the party. It was only 7:23. She had plenty of time to get ready. When she was finally ready, she looked beautiful! Her new red dress fit in with her curvy, hot body, which made her look sexy. She could hardly wait what Sergio would think. She already knew what the other guys would think, as usual, they would stare with the eyes and mouths wide open. Her hair was straight with a bump on top, and a white flower nest to her ear. She wore the silver jewerly she had boughten yesterday. She looked fantastic! Her older brother George dropped her off at the party. When she got there everyone was already there and it was only 8:30. Then she spotted Sandra and Maddie. Sandra was wearing a navy blue longsleeve shirt with a black short skirt with a black belt in between. Maddie had curled her hair and wore a silver short dress. Then she saw Sergio. Even though she only saw him a couple of times she felt like she had known him forever. She knew she had to make a move now, so she walked over to him. Hi,I said. Hi, Sergio replied. There was a long silence. So, You having a good time tonight?, I asked. Yeah. I guess it's okay, he said. It's just okay? Whats wrong with it? No, nothing. I just miss my home. "I'll show you to love it here too", Andrea thought. Instead she said," Why did you leave Texas"? My dad heard about the school Sandra was going to, and he wanted me to get a better education. You know how parents are with their kids. Yeah, I replied. In side Andrea knew that was not true. At least not to her. Her mom never paid much attention to her, and couldn't care less of what Andrea did with her life. Her dad was in Arizona working for a car agency. He bearly called home. "Are you okay"? Sergio asked. Yeah im alright. I replied. I have to go to the bathroom, I said. I'll be right back to keep you company. Dissapointment I went to the bathroom mirror. Andrea wanted to cry, but she didn't want to smudge her make up. She tried to fight back the tears. She remembered the time her dad was always home, and her mom accually cared for her. It had all passed so fast. Minutes later, Andrea retured to the party. She looked at the spot she had last seen Sergio but he wasn't there. Finally she saw him. Dancing with Maddie. Andrea felt dissapointed. She tought they were having a conversation, and now he just dumps her like that? No one did that to Andrea. No one. Umm, Excuse me?, I said, iterupting their dance. What?, asked Maddie. Sergio and I were talking. That's not what I saw, he was standing there all by himself, Maddie said. Well, I was in the restroom, but now I'm back. So you better scurry off, I said. Excuse you?, said Maddie. But I don't think your the one who is supposed to decide for him. Anyways, why do you make such a big deal about it? Just shut up! I said, as I pulled Sergio by the arm to where we were talking. But he didn't move. Excuse me Andrea but, I was dancing with Maddie, he said. You can't just come up and make me stop dancing with Maddie just because you say so. I thought you were a different person, but now that I see your additude, I found out that your not he person I thought you were! With those words, Sergio stormed off with Maddie following. Andrea had never felt more angry. Usually when a guy turned her down because of her additude, Andrea didn't really care. But with Sergio, it was different. Andrea wanted to scream. She hated Maddie. She hated this party. She hated this day. And for the very first time, she hated herself. Without a word,Andrea stormed out of the house. Sandra followed. "What happened"?, she asked. Nothing, I replied. I just want to go home. I feel sick. Come on tell me, she insisted. "Nothing"!, Andrea yelled annoyed. "Just leave me alone, would you"?. Gosh! Andrea dieled George's phone number. Sandra was staring sadly. In just two rings George answered the phone. Sandra went inside. In six minutes George's car parked in front of Sandra's house. He got out and Andrea ran into his arms. What happened?, he asked. Dont ask, I just want to go home. I said. They both got in the car and went home. Angry The next day, Andrea kept on thinking about last night. Text: @2012 Images: GonzalezPhotos All rights reserved. Publication Date: May 25th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-nicolekristy
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-kitanya-mermaid-tale/
Kitanya Mermaid Tale Be careful with your secrets Ysabella Johnson Zelda always knew she was different from other people. She was the only one she knew who had the power to become a mermaid. She didn’t know why or how this magical thing happened. All she had was her curious purple hair and a locket she always kept with her. “Today is going to suck.” Zelda decided as she rolled out of bed. She walked into her bathroom and made sure to lock the door before taking a bath. As she stepped into the tub, her hair grew long and wavy with a magical glisten and her legs turned into a long, blue, shiny fish tail. When she started looking around for her brush, she noticed it was not there. Hungry with anger, she yelled. “OH MY FUCKING DIDDY KONG WHERE THE FUCKING SHIT HELL IS MY FUCKING DAMN BRUSH BITCH?” Her maid, Cookie, kicked opens the locked door and left it on her toilet seat before walking back out. She was scared of Zelda’s temper tantrums. Not that you could blame her. She was always left out, yet still very gorgeous because she is a main character. But apparently that doesn’t matter, because all you readers want is a perfect main character. I guess there’s also there’s that: I’m so different and special, feel pity for me because my life sucks – thing, too. Since her parents died, because she is a main character. Anyway, She brushed her hair and it became magically sweet, gentle, and gorgeous. But no one realizes this because it is still only the first part of the story. She got out and toweled herself dry so she could turn back into a human. Then she changed into her outfit (Skinny jeans and a graphic t-shit. Keeping it simple, and yet it’s not simple because she is the main character) and went downstairs for breakfast. She only had some toast before running out because she realized she was late. Cookie was waiting for her with the car in the driveway and she made sure to avoid the puddles from last night’s rain as she walked over to the car. As soon as she got in, they were off. The ride to school was rather quiet, and Zelda kept fiddling with her gold locket, trying to open it up. She felt a strange feeling about today, that something different was going to happen. And she was right. Standing right by the gates of the school was this tall, dark, and handsome mysterious young man who is also funny and kind and cool and everything because the people who read these books know that a guy cannot be all of these traits at once and they will never find someone like that. She gasped and blushed a deep scarlet, because the main character is always super pale/white and has no idea how to control her displays of obvious attraction. She stumbled to the front gate and fate managed to make her trip RIGHT beside this boy so that he may catch her and she may say something stupid like “Th-th-th-thanks…” and he won’t say anything because this mysterious boy is above all human social norms. Instead he smirks and disappears into the crowd which does not make sense, but happens anyway because this is a romance story. Zelda stands there gaping like a fish and looking around her like an idiot. After a few good minutes she starts walking to class, remembering that life still goes on even though she met her future boyfriend-forever….thing. When she gets in to class he’s sitting in the spot conveniently next to her and she blushed again and stumbles over to her spot and says “Thanks for saving me there…” in a really awkward manner even though she already said thanks. But that doesn’t matter because she is the main character and he’s the soon-to-be-hero. “No problem,” he mutters. Zelda realizes that his voice is like deep velvet and his dark eyes are like the night sky and his black hair is like a raven and his sickly pale skin looks like a porcelain doll. She blushes once again, and class goes on. She didn’t notice that he was staring at her locket the whole entire class because she is stupid. After school, Zelda called Cookie to tell her she would be walking home today because she was going to go to the beach. Cookie knew Zelda only wanted to swim in the ocean and agreed because that is the only exercise Zelda gets because she is too depressedmaincharacter-y to join a team or get outside. When Zelda makes it to the beach she goes into her special swimming spot she found a few years ago so she could swim in peace. It was super pretty for no real reason, and there she shed her clothing and jumped into the water, doing that magical thing that turns her into a mermaid. People have hunted mermaids for centuries. For all Zelda knew, she was the only mermaid on land. As Zelda flicked her fin, and grazed along the water, she noticed the underwater sea creatures were on edge. She fluttered down to the hollow sunken ship where her only friend, Navi, lived. Navi was another mermaid. Navi could not go above water. She would immediately burn and disintegrate. Zelda greeted her with a warm hug, but quickly retreated afraid of Navi's glistening teeth on her shoulder. Navi was recently on edge as well, and wouldn't tell Zelda why. Navi talked to her about rumor of a young merman. Zelda thought back to earlier with her encounter of a mysterious boy. She blushed, and returned to Navi with a question. When the time was late, Zelda swam up to where her clothing lay. As Zelda put on her clothes, she heard a rustle in the shrubs nearby. Zelda quickly laid in the steep hole to the right of her. After several minutes, she slowly put on her underwear and bra. She felt someone watching her and she quickly threw on her shirt and jeans. She ran home without looking back. Had she been caught? Publication Date: April 17th 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-zeldaismybestfriend5
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-claudia-m-garcia-revenge-is-sweet/
Claudia M. Garcia Revenge is Sweet Chapter 1 "Run!" That's what he said to me before the gun went off. In that moment everything around me went into slow motion. I saw when 'he' shoot the gun; I saw when the man I loved got shot right through the hart, and fell on his own blood. I wanted to run, but not away from the man with the killer, but towards the love of my life. Instead of doing just that I stayed where I was, frozen. In that split second that I saw the life live his eyes I realized that the only good thing in my life had been ripped away from me. In the exact moment that his body hit the ground everything zapped back into place. When that happend I turned my back on the man that I loved lifeless body, and just ran. I ran with all of my might with only one though to motivate me not to get killed, I will get my revenge. ................................................................................ "Ugh!" I woke up gasping for air. I had been dreaming the same nightmare everyday for the past three years now, and each night that I dream it it only maid it more frighting. I closed my eyes, and tried to slow down my heart beat. I didn't realize that I had been gripping the sheets until I opened my eyes, and saw how white my knuckles where. I couldn't help feeling broken every time I woke up from that nightmare, just as I couldn't help the rage that came right after it. In the past three years seen's my hart was ripped from my chest, the only thing that has kept me going is getting revenge on those son of a bitches who killed him. Seen's his death I have been training how to fight, to defend myself, to shoot any type of gun, and to use any type of weapon that has ever been maid. I have trained myself to use anything so that I can get back at the son of a bitches who killed Micah. My hart skipped a beat just from thinking his name. I haven't allowed myself to think of him mush seen's his death, because every time that I though of all the good times that we had together, the day of his death always seems to taint them. Chapter 2 I snapped out of it when I heard someone knock on my bedroom door."Mel are you awake?" I heard Zane say from behind the door. Zane is my trainer, friend, and in a way he's family. He found me lost in the woods with blood all over me. He had taken me to his home to clean me up right after he found me. *************************************************************************************** I was sitting down on a chair in a light green colored kitchen. I was scared, I didn't know what to do. What if they found me, they would take me back with them, and kill this innocent man who's only crime has been to help me. These thoughts crossed my mind while the dark hair man was wiping away the blood on my face with a wet cloth. I winced when he was cleaning one of the wounds I had on my forehead. "Sorry," he said. I noticed that his voice was deep, strong, and very sexy. I know I shouldn't be thinking this considering that the man that I loved had been killed not more than two hours ago, but I cant help notice that he is a very attractive man, and I am sure that if we had met in a different situation, and of course if I had never met Micah then we would probably be having some fun(if you know what I mean). As much as I would wish that would have been in a different situation, but we aren't, and frankly I don't regret having meet Micah. "So are you ready to tell me who did this to you?" the dark haired man said snapping me out of my thoughts. I hadn't realized that he had finished cleaning most of the blood off of me, or that he was crouched in front of me with a look on his face as if he was expecting me to burst into tears or something. "Well? Are you going to answer me?" he asked again a little bit annoyed. "No, I am not ready yet," I was startled to hear that my voiced sounded choked. He started at me for what seemed like an eternity to me; he looked at me as if he was trying to figure something out. After about another minute of his staring, he finally said,"well then I should show you to your room so that you can get cleaned up". I was startled with what he said, I thought that he was going to press me for information as to why I was covered in blood, but he hadn't and I had no idea why. When I finally nodded he got up, and offered me his hand. I hesitated a little before taking his had, but finally took it. He helped me up from my chair, and started leading the way with my had still in his. I wasn't really paying attention as to where we were going, but when he suddenly stopped I bumped into him by accident. "Here we are," he said while I took a small step back when I realized how close we were. I nodded once again while he opened the door to the bedroom that I would be staying in until I figured out what I was going to do. He walking in first, and I fallowed. When I entered the room I was surprised to see how cleaned the room was. "There is the bathroom," he pointed to a closed door that was to my right, "I will go get some clean clothes for you to change into," he said while he started walking towers the door. When he opened the door though I finally realized that he didn't know my name, or I his. "Melissa," I said," that is my name, but you can call me Mel everyone dose". He turned around to face me, and I realized for the first time that he had the most beautiful dark green eyes I had ever seen. "Melissa, that's a beautiful name," I was kind of flattered by the compliment. "Thank you sir," I said quietly, but when I realized that he was about to leave I blurted out, "What's your name?" He stopped once again, but this time he didn't turn to face me. "Zane," he said before he walked out of the room. ***************************************************************************************** I shook my head to clear it from the old memory when I heard Zane knock on the door again. " Mel I know your are up, so you better get your ass to the kitchen I five minutes!" he said in a very low, but dangerous voice. Knowing that if I didn't respond he would probably break my door down or something. "Erg! Fine!" "Good, know hurry up then, and don't use that tone with me young lady," he said with a teasing voice. "Whatever you say Zane Macory Luther" I heard him freeze mid step down the hall. "I told you not to ever say my full name again Melissa!" Zane doesn't like his middle name, and hates it when people say it. "Whatever old man," oh and he also hates being called old. "I am not old Melissa!" he was screaming at me while he started to walk down the hall.I snickered, got up from bed, and headed to get ready for the day. AUTHOR'S NOTE: WHEN I DO THIS ******* IT MEANS THAT SOMEONE IS HAVING A FLASH BACK. Chapter 3 I was sitting down on the table, my legs crossed on the chair with Zane sitting in the chair in front of me. He had a cup of coffee in his hand, and a news paper in the other, while I had I plate of waffles and syrup, and a cup of coffee in front of me. I was eating my waffles in peace minding my own bisness when Zane said out of nowhere, "You're eating like a pig". I know can you believe that? "Shut the fuck up!" I snapped at him. He looked at me over the newspaper and said, "You know their are a lot of more things that you could do with that pretty mouth of yours then to tell me to shut the fuck up", amusement was all over his voice when he said this. "That's very doubt foul Zane Macory!" I snapped at him. All amusement left his face as soon as I said that sentence. "Melissa Lopez, what did I tell you about using my middle name?" he growled at me. Like I said before, he hates it when people use his middle name. Being my mischievous self I said, "What did you say Macory? I couldn't hear you, would you mind talking a little louder please?" His eyes lit up, and faster then I could say shit he had me pined up against the wall.He leaned in even closer, and wispered in my hear, "Dont test me Mel, or the next time you say my middle name again you will be screaming it out with passion" he pressed his body closer to mine so that I could feel his little buddy. "What makes you think that I would ever even remotely feel passion towers you?" "You're body betrays you Mel" he ran a hand down my back, and stopped when he got to my lower back. That's the thing that I liked about Zane; he could tease you all he wants, but he will never force you into anything. "Are you sure that it's my body that's betraying me?" this time I was the one who leaned in and whispered in his ear, "Try again". I looked down, and he followed my gaze. When he realized how big his little buddy was he said, "Shit!" and stepped away from me. "Go run ten miles without stopping!" he snapped at me, and then walked out of the room. Awwwww man! That's what I get for messing with him, but he wasn't wrong when he said that my body betrayed me. I could feel the dampness in my pannys. Their was nothing I could do about the way my body reacted towards him, just as their was nothing he could do towards the way his body reacted towards me. So I went up to my room to get ready for a very long run. Publication Date: October 12th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-claudianstephy4ever
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-the-teenage-drama-queen-the-confessions-of-the-teenage-drama-queen/
The Teenage Drama Queen The Confessions of the Teenage Drama Queen 2012 Entries 26-6-2012 10.30pm Okay. So, I'm starting these entries for fun mostly! But also to prove the fact that being a teenager is seriously hard! And, yes. The Teenage Drama Queen may exaggerate now and again but any teenager out there will understand where I'm coming from. You have GCSE's coming up, frienimies to watch your back for and everything seems to just be building up right? Yeh. Mix in some of your family, your families family and gosh knows who else thrown in and you get this messed up mix of screwed up teen life. Lot's of parents say they understand but something's telling me that it doesn't quite add up. "Stop over-exaggerating, so what if you have a twenty page essay due in first thing tomorrow, you have to go to bed RIGHT NOW!" I can see that they just want to help or whatever but it just doesn't make sense to me. You know how embarrassing they can be! So yes, that's why I began writing this for fun and also, to get out all my rubbish going on in my head and getting it onto all these pages. So enjoy my cookie monsters. Love T xx 11.15pm You know, I was just sat here, wondering. And it dawned on me, ever since I was little up to now, I always dreamed of being famous. But it isn't fame I'm looking for, I guess it would be nice, the money, the popularity, who wouldn't want it?! But no, it was the fact that I want to do something with my life rather than just sit around and wait for things to happen, I mean, what's the point? Well, I'm going to get some Z's now, I'm a pretty tired drama queen! Goodnight mis amigos. Love T xx Publication Date: June 26th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-theteenagedramaqueen
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-brianna-m-brandon-m-waiting-for-normal/
Brianna M & Brandon M. Waiting For Normal Trying To Fit In My name is Ali Baker and I live in Brooklyn New York. I live in a two story house, with my older brother who name is Tyrone Baker, and my single mom Layla. My dad walked out on her when i was only 4 years old. When ever I talked about him, with my brother he used to get so mad. I guess he doesn't have fond memories of him. Ever since i was a kid i was always the target of being bullied. And in all my life I can say I only had one best friend. And her name is Jasmine. She was light skinned and had long black hair. The kids would always call me a toothpick, and a giant. When it was summer and when we had to go to school I would be a freshman in High school, and my brother was a Junior and on the football team, he was the Quarter-back. So I decided i needed to start fresh, change my look. I worked all that summer working a Cafe, when summer was almost over I had 560 dollars. I got 6 pairs of high heels, 3 pairs of sneakers, and like 70 new outfits. I changed my hair.I got a perm and got highlights. I was a totally new person. When it was the first day at school i wore black skinny jeans with a purple and gold jacket that you could see my flat stomach, and i wore purple heels, that made me like 5'8. After i finished I put on lip gloss got my book bag and phone, and then i heard the door bell, and i knew it was Jasmine. My brother got the door. When i was finally ready i went down stairs, and their mouths drop. "Don't you like it I look hot right?" I said as i turned around so they could get a better view. "Uh... Uh..." They said trying to get their words out. "Well i don't want to be late for my first day of high school." I said walking out to my brother's car and sat in the front seat. They walked behind me and Tyrone got in the car and Jasmine got in the back. It was a 30 minutes drive to school. A 30 minutes drove we took in silence. When we got to school everyone knew Tyrone and his friend Nick Johnson. Nick was a good looker. He was tanned and had black short hair and wore a Black and yellow Polo with Cargo pants with a hat and had on Chuck Taylors. Tyrone was already out of the car talking to Nick. Jasmine and me got out the car and i walked to Tyrone and Nick was looking at me in shock. He always knew me as his best friend little sister and now he knew me as his best friend hot sister. "Pick me up at the end of the day and don't forget okay." I said to Tyrone. "Yeah okay." He said to me now looking at Nick looking at me. He hit him on the arm. "Ow dude." He said. "Hey Ali how about i walk to to your class." Nick asked me, while Tyrone is looking at us now. "Sure why not." I said grabbing Jasmine. The three of us was walking to homeroom, I was so lucky because Jasmine was in my homeroom class. "So Ali you changed." He said checking me out. "Yeah decided to do something different." I said. "Well you look... nice." He said now we was at my homeroom. "Thanks see you later i guess." I said walking into my homeroom class with Jasmine. When we walked in all the boys who made fun of me was now checking me out wishing they could get with me and the girl wishing they looked like me, and I'm not going to lie i was happy. Jasmine and me sat next together. When it was lunch time i found out that the popular freshman in the school liked me. When me and Jasmine went to the lunchroom i was surprise it was HUGE! So that's why two grades shared the same lunch period. And luckily for me freshman was with Juniors. I sat down with Jasmine the Lunchroom was empty we was the first people to get there. "so you like Tom Simmons?" She asked me. "Nah" I said. Like nine minutes later every freshman and and junior was there. And then i see Nick sitting next to me. "hey i hear you have a few crush." He said. "Yeah I guess." I said. Jasmine and Nick and Me talked for the whole lunch period. When I got home I decided to go on Facebook. I went on my page I saw that Valerie said I was "Easy." Timmy from the 8th grade said I was a "Fast Girl." Then Emmma said that "Did you see Ali Baker she totally look like an Easy girl Lol she needs to grow up and stop trying to get guys i bet she will be pregnant by the end of the school year." It felt every word was taking a hit at me. I cried the whole entire night. The next day I was gone. I didn't talk to anybody and I was like a ghost. When i went to the bathroom and I saw 3 girls smoking weed. "Hey aren't you the easy girl? Um.. Ali right." One girl said and then they all laughed. "I'm not Easy. What are you doing?" I said looking at the weed. "What does it look like?" Another girl said. "Hey you want some? Unless your scared." The third girl said. "I'm not scared." I said moving closing to them, as one girl handed me the weed. I took a long puff. And when i was done i started laughing making them laugh. "Your cool. Hang out with us today after school." A girl said. "Okay." I said. "I'm Britney, she is Amber, and she is Sammy. Britney said pointing to each girl. "Hey." I said. Then I left. By the end of the day i found them. I was suppose to go with Tyrone but i thought he wouldn't miss me. We walked to Britney's House, nobody was home. "hey take one." Britney said handing me weed. I took it and she lighted it up for me. By 7:00 Amber, Sammy, and me left. They walked me to my house. We was laughing so loud. They the door Opened. "WHERE WAS YOU?" Tyrone yelled. We all laughed. "GET IN THE HOUSE AND YOU TWO LEAVE!" He said. "Bye" I said still kinda laughing. "Bye." They said. I got in the house and at this point i was so high. "Are you high?" Tyrone asked. "No." I said laughing and going upstairs. I went to my room and locked the door. I changed into my Pajamas. Then went to sleep. I stayed home from school the next day i wasn't feeling good. When school was over Tyrone came home and Nick was there too. Next thing i know Nick is in my room. "hey... Tyrone told me what happen. Your okay?" He said. "Yeah." I said. "were you really high?" He asked. I laughed and turned around. "How is this funny?" He said. "You haven't seen my Facebook page I'm the easy girl, the fast girl." I said. "that's why you are doing this." He said. "You have no idea how it feels, be attacked, because your perfect. And don't say your not because I knew you my Entire life. Your the guy that girls want to date and every thing comes easy to." I said. He laughed. "If i was so perfect why am i failing almost all my classes. And if i seem Perfect I have to be or at least make it look like that, If i don't get a college scholarship then there goes my changes of going to college. That's why i need Football." As he was talking i felt like i couldn't keep mt eyes open the next thing i hear is he yelling ALI ALI ARE YOU OKAY, then my brother came in, the rest is blank. PART 1 Publication Date: August 11th 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-laylaangelz
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-leslie-thompson-a-miner-039-s-life-in-15-words/
Leslie Thompson A Miner's Life in 15 Words In a rush of blood and water, his life ended the same as it began. Publication Date: October 25th 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-lesliethompson
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-xicano-sol-best-friends/
Xicano Sol Best Friends Joteria Chronicles #1328 “I know he had an on-going sexual relationship with my best friend, but it just didn’t matter to me. It’s not like I planned it, but when the opportunity presented itself I went for it. Now the guy I hooked up with isn't returning my calls and I’ve lost my best friend too.” He looked down and you could feel a sense of shame and guilt enter the room. I asked him how he felt about what happened and he stated that his best friend was over-reacting… “It’s not like they were in a relationship, they were just sex partners. I don’t see what the big deal is.” I asked him if he ever considered that this guy was more than just a sex partner to his best friend and maybe that’s why his feelings were hurt. He said “maybe” and just looked down again as the energy in the room began to shift towards anger. “My best friend has always had guys to hook-up with and never thought about the lack of attention I get at the clubs. Sometimes I would think certain guys were attractive and they would end up hooking up with my best friend. So now he knows what it feels like.” He took a breath and I could tell he heard the angst in his voice and just then he started to understand his own actions. He went on to say that he’s never been able to keep a best friend because similar situations had occurred in the past. He realized that his hook-ups had nothing to do with opportunity but rather his own insecurities and lack of confidence. In closing he said, “I’m going to call my best friend and apologize for what I’ve done to our friendship. I don’t think he’s going to want to be friends anymore, but I still think it’s something I need to do.” Publication Date: January 13th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-xicano.sol
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-danea-cyber-bully/
Danea Cyber Bully Its not fun to get made fun of i dedicate this book to my friends and family. Chapter One Ok Mya hurry up before you be late. Mya: i know i know Mom: well ok I slipped on my uniform and walked out the door to the bus. I saw a whole bunch of kids standing and waiting till the bus arrived. Then 6 girls came up to me. Lauren: hi im lauren and you are Me: oh im mya im new Taylor: well im taylor and this is lauren,kenzie,masha,tasha and lousie Me: oh well hey Louise: you wanna sit with us at lunch ME: sure if thats ok Lauren: of course were just nice Me: well thanks. then the bus arrived. I got on and took a seat Kenzie: umm you dont wanna sit by her Me: why Kenzie: shes a dork Everybody on the bus laughed and the girl put her book up to her head. Kenzie: umm here come sit by me She scooted over and i sat next to her Kenzie: Now mya tell me about you Me: well imma girl and i like sports Kenzie: oh my god all 6 of us dont do sports all we have to do is go around the school and look pretty. Me: oh well thats pretty cool Taylor: oh yeah it is All six of them laugh. Tasha: well were here look at your new school Me: wow this is it Masha: what did you expect a barn and a bell Me: i laughed then they all laughed. Kenzie took my hand and all 7 of us were holding hands walking in the building. They took me straight to the bathroom. Masha: look mya if your going to hang with us u need to look nice they started ripping my clothes and gave me this tiny skirt it was red and black like a plad shirt. Then they gave me this half white top with a tie. Me: what do you want me to do with it Masha: umm put it on duah Me: ok i said then i put the clothes on and came back out the bathroom. Kenzie: wow you look amazing Then they took my hair out of a bun and started to fluff it up and let it down. I looked like one of them. taylor: now you look like one of us. They started to laugh and we walked to class Chapter Two E al had found out that we all had the same schedule, and right now we were going to lunh together. We sat at a table. Masha: now new girl you cant sit at any other table besides this one. Me: why not Taylor: cuzz there filled with lames Then we got up to get our lunch. Then this boy came up. He walked over to me. Boy: hey are you new Me: yeah Taylor: look jason shes not intrested so you can run alone now. The girls laughed. Jason: well i came over here for masha and i was wondering Masha: no Jason: but you cut me off you didnt even know what i was going to say Masha: look jason were done and i know you so the answer is no. Jason: you ugly anyway He left. Taylor: look mya dont you ever talk to him he goes with so many girls Tasha: what a player. We walked back to our table and sat down. Publication Date: February 19th 2013 https://www.bookrix.com/-iluv.gummybears
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-luis-medina-martin/
Luis Medina MARTIN A Tradegy Text: Luis Medina All rights reserved. Publication Date: March 1st 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-mynameiscool
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-riley-and-allyvia-a-teenage-crisis-2/
Riley and Allyvia A teenage crisis 2 So I have to admit, I didn’t ruin being friends with Riley. In fact, we actually get along very well. Way better than I thought, anyways. (Maybe she could set me up with Dustin? She is his sister after all…) I go to my dorm at seven-thirty, the dark shadows casting an eerie glow on my bedroom door, to meet my new roommates. We’ll all be staying in dorm two, room two-oh-nine, in the fourth floor. Curfew rules are strict- you must be in bed by nine o’clock every night, or else you have to clean the bathrooms for a week. “Look, Natalie, I’ve asked you nicely, keep your stuff off my bed,” I heard an annoyed voice snap as I nudged the door open with my foot. “Well, I think I should be able to keep my stuff where ever I please,” I heard another voice reply. I peeked my head around the corner to see two unfamiliar faces. “Oh, look, you must be Alex,” a brown haired brown eyed girl chirped, bouncing to my side. “I’m Natalie,” she smiled, extending her hand. “Alyssa,” the other girl said in a British accent. She had green eyes and black hair that hung in her eyes. “Alex,” I smiled half-heartedly. “Did I interrupt something,” I asked, looking around the tornado struck room. Clothes and papers littered the floor, makeup in piles on the bathroom sink. “Well, dear little Natalie over here, thinks she can leave her stuff where ever she likes,” Alyssa complained, throwing a pile of junk off her bed. “It’s not my fault! I have less closet space than the janitor,” Natalie cried, opening a tiny, shabby looking closet that was already filled with clothes. I could tell this year was going to be… interesting, to say the least. I woke up earlier than usual, startled awake. My neighbor, Marissa, is up with her music loud enough for me to hear through the thin paper-like walls. Normally, I’d be a heavy sleeper, but today I wasn’t. All I can think about is my dream that I had. It was about Dustin. We sat there, watching the other. No talking, no touching, just silence. Normally, silence would drive me insane, but with Dustin… I don’t mind. I had talked to him a few times in the hallways, but usually with Riley and his flock of girls that follow him everywhere as if he were some movie-star. Always in a crowd. I never let him know I liked him, because I knew he was dating Lindsey. Have you ever wanted to ruin someone else’s relationship before? I haven’t, until now. This feeling is awkward! I’m surprised at how I’m reacting to this. Anyways, since I woke up early, I started to get ready for school. I dressed prettier than yesterday, to see if Dustin would notice. I put on the last of my mascara and slung my bag over my shoulder, ready for school. “Hey, Alexandra, you look nice,” Dustin smiled as I walked into my first class, Ballroom Dancing. They had the guys pick partners (girls) according to height. I started freaking out because I have no idea how to dance and I was worried I’d get stuck with some guy I don’t know. “Okay, Dustin, you can pick first,” our teacher, Mrs. smith smiled. “Kyle, who should I pick,” Dustin asked quietly, turning to his best friend. “I don’t know… how about that new chick, she’s pretty hot!” “Who, Alexandra?” “Yeah, Alexandra. If you don‘t pick her, I will,” Kyle nodded eagerly. “I don’t know, she seems like a… oh, what’s the word?” “Cruel skank know it all?” “Yeah,” Dustin nodded. I was hurt that he thought so lowly of me, but I was going to change that. “But, she is the hottest girl here,” Kyle grinned mischievously. “Alight, I choose Alexandra,” Dustin smiled. My heart almost leapt out of my chest. As we began stretching, I began to worry. A lot. I didn’t know how to dance. At all. I was probably going to step on his feet and fall flat on my face. As we all stood to begin dancing, my legs turned to spaghetti and my palms began to sweat. And then, suddenly, Dustin’s hand was on my back, spinning me in circles, guiding me gracefully to the music. At the final dip, he looked into my eyes and I couldn’t help but blush. And then I kissed him. I hadn’t meant to, if anything I wanted to avoid it. It was just another reason for Lindsey and her clones to hate me. But I did it anyways. Big mistake. I broke away to see Lindsey standing there, her mouth wide open and eyes narrowed in hatred. Dustin quickly let go of me, letting me fall to the ground, along with my dignity, and rushed after Lindsey, who had ran out of the room. I wasn’t sure what happened when they were in the hallway but when he came back, he was upset. Because of me. I was fairly quiet for the rest of the class… until the bell rang. “Alex,” I heard Dustin call my name. I considered rushing out of the room and hiding in the girls’ bathroom for the rest of my life when he jogged up, grabbing hold of my arm as I attempted to leave. “Hey, Alex, can I call you that?” I nodded numbly, aware of all the people gaping at us. “I’m sorry about class, today,” we said at the same time, making it even more awkward. Okay, so maybe I wasn’t sorry but I wasn’t going to tell him that. “Look, here’s my number, in case you want to practice,” he smiled. I blushed a lot because at first I didn’t think he was talking about dancing. “Dancing, I mean, in case you want to practice dancing. You can call anytime,” he added quickly, catching on to my blunder. “Okay,” I nodded sheepishly, unaware of what I should say next. So I left it at that and walked away before he could say anything else. I headed to my next class, only to run into Dustin again. Proper etiquette had never been my area of expertise but I tried my hardest to avoid Dustin. I’ll just sum up the whole class period for you: AWKWARD! Time flew fast and it was already Saturday. In two days, I would have to face Dustin again. We had every class together and I couldn’t really skip class. I wasn’t really sure how I should feel about that considering Lindsey is my sort of step-sister and Dustin is her now ex-boyfriend. I was about to sit down for lunch when Riley grabbed hold of my arm. “We have to talk.” She said it was urgent so I followed her into her dorm. “How could you, Alex?!” I asked her what was wrong and she was quiet for a moment, considering how to put into words. “I knew you liked Dustin, but not enough to steal him from Lindsey, your sister,” she practically yelled. “Number one, Lindsey will never ever be my sister. Number two, I didn’t steal him,” I cried. Right? Publication Date: March 19th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-rapper527
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-melanier18-my-prom-gone-bad/
MelanieR18 My Prom gone bad My prom experience was kinda depressing and annoying, to tell you the truth.... Lets start at the beginning shall we? First, I got a note from Braden a week after he started school here, asking me to the prom. Of course, I said yes I'm not an dolt, a totally hot guy moves to little old Piute and asks me to prom. HEEEEEEELLLLLLOOOOOOO! Anyway, life was good until a few weeks later when he says he wants to go with Dallis. I sure felt wanted. I tried to act fine with it, but inside my self-esteem took a serious nose dive! I told him, “that's ok” and he said “Good because I already asked her.” The nerve!! I felt like a piece of tissue that he wiped his preppy boogies on, and then tossed in the trash! Why didn't he just tear out my heart and serve it on rye, with a side order of tots. Moving along. After that insanely demoralizing episode, Timothy Lloyd asked me to prom, and I said yes.We had been dating for four or five months. A couple weeks down the road he started talking smack about my religion, saying that I should stop listening to my bishop and start listening to him. A. . . . NO! So I said he was wrong and I hung up. I've never cried so hard in my life. I could literally hear my heart shattering. The next day EJ Moore asked me to prom. WOW, word got out fast. I didn't care any more so I said sure why not. Literally two days later he said he wanted to go with Jackie. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . I GIVE UP!!! WHAT? DO I REPEL MEN?! DO I STINK? WHAT?? !!! I said that was fine and I walked away, he must have felt bad because he said he would go with me anyway. Oh ya, that's loads of fun, going to prom with someone who would rather go with my sister?! This was my prom! Not theirs! I wanted to have a good time! The date wasn't much better. We went to EJ's and watched movies, it was awkward because we double dated with Spencer and Jackie. Then after the movie we went to Spencer's. Jackie and I got left alone with his dad for two hours while they went gallivanting outside. Yay! Learning the dance was pretty easy, until I got Kelten Price as a partner. It was fun, don't get me wrong, but I couldn't concentrate! He kept making me laugh and I would forget the steps. At the end of the dance, you had to sit on their knee, grab their face, and look deep into there eyes. I couldn't do it! So he grabbed my face, and got two inches away, then stared right into my eyes. I went bright red, squeaked, covered my mouth with one hand, and swatted him away with the other. He just laughed and said, “This is going to be fun!” Decorating was fun if you like going bleacher diving. No one wanted that job, so guess who got stuck with it. . . . Me. Oh it was Fuuuuunnnnn! I had gum in my hair, my body could barely fit between them, I picked up something covered in blood. Yuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmmy! The ceiling was the hardest part, but it turned out beautifully! The steps were hard to make, and the paint got everywhere, but I made a lot of great memories. One day when Dallis and I were painting I saw Aubrey sitting over by herself, so I walked over to her, and wiped white paint all over her face. She started laughing and got me back, then Dallis ran the paint roller down my face, I looked like an Indian. We laughed and then got busted, so we got back to work. The person who impressed me the most was Allen Zingleman. I didn't know that kid could work, but man was I wrong! The person who depressed me the most was Dallis Johnson.I know, right? We seem to get along so well. The thing was, she got mad because I was talking to Bradon, she totally blew up! She sounded like this, “you don't have any compassion for my feelings! Bradon and I just broke up and you're talking to him?!” Bla Blaaaaa Blaaaaaaa Yata Yataaa Yataaaaa Like she had compassion for my feelings when she knew he had already asked me to prom and yet said yes when he asked her. Then she walked over and started flirting with Cash Newby. . . WHATEVER! Performing the prominade was difficult, and my full-face mask was hard to breath in! I almost passed out! EJ had a little pity party if I didn't dance with him every five seconds. Overall Evaluation. . . . . . . . It SUCKED big time! Publication Date: September 12th 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-snowpanther1818
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-kadalia-williams-we-bad-bitches/
kadalia williams, kadaila williams we bad bitches never thought i would fall in love chapter 1 is it my gut or is it chardonnay telling me that i know better than sneeking out in the middle of the night                            to go see this hood nigga .you see i like to think of my self as a bad bitch , and when bad bitches want fuck they get fuck it could be the middle of the night or fucking lunch time . thats why i need to see my man cause its been a while and at this point i could care less about chardonnay or her big mouth she is so annoying i think i need a new best friend cause she aint ganna make this shorty look like a fool .when i met up with jermain i told him straight up that i wanted the dick and he didn't hesitate he had me acting like i was having a damn siezure up in there . when we were done we smoke a blunt and he droped me and chardonnay home . when i got home every thing was normal i got away with this shit once again , i'm a slick motherfucker . where i'm from you got to know how to use your head ,by the way i'm from brooklyn i live with my mom and dad who are always fucking and my and my twin  sister erica and jessica those kids are gonna kill me before i turn seventeen chapter 2 my dad made sure me ,my mom,and the babies had what we want we never look a mess i have all the boys in brooklyn wanting me , oh yeah i have that effect on people.cause guess what i'm a bad bitch just like my mom that how my mom got to keep a sexy guy like my dad sean around for so long . i just use these idiots out here to get what i want including jermain. going shopping on me was the first thing my   mom said to me when i walked into her room  . you mean going shopping on dad i said and we both laughed. my dad is the most loyal man i know and he never gave me any reason to be mad at him. i'm his first child and i knew him more than any one else me and my mom went shopping that afternoon for the  most flyest shit sometime i feel like i love my dad for that reason only i have been told i was cold hearted but i really don't care because in life you have to get yours i don't see me getten married are nothing like that , thats too big of a commitment amma be a bad bitch all my life getten mine are a tot if i may say so.                                                                                                                 chapter 3 on this hot summer day down in brooklyn with nothing to do , i saw shasha walking up to us  there was five of us and she was the eldest . who wanna make a 1000 dollars tonight she asked and yeah we all jumped up , cause who dont want a 1000 dollars. dont worry we all can make a thousand dollar  .  doing what kiesha asked . dancing for some men  you mean dancing and a blow job which may lead to fucking them niggas  . could be shasha said well i'm in cause thats a couple new piecses add to my closet right we all laugh and headed to go get dressed                          when we got to the hotel i felt good i felt ready just to open the door to five old ass man looking like 80 years old . shit got me bumb tight cause i wasn't about to suck no shrivled dick that could probably hardly stand. by the looks on my face every body could tell i was about to go off. fix your face and dont ruin this for me  shasha said quietly still with a sexy face it took everything in me to smile but i did any ways                                                           that was the longest fucking night of my life i couldnt wait to get out of that place it was gross  even tho i walk away with a big ass tip that brought me up to 1870 the other girls were dumb tight but it aint my fault they didn't hold shit down. chaper 4 are you willing to help me help you , my councelor asked . i dont need help i replied with a straight face . then why are you here . lets get something clear old lady i am here because i have to be not becaue i want to ,and what the hell i need your help for , to become an annoying old woman like you who have no kids, no husband cause i damn sure dont see no ring, and just kits a fucking table and get all up in other peoples business when you clearly got issues yourself ,hell no i don't think so boo boo . i want to help you london she said with a calm voice . it aint no damn help if you getting payed for it i said while walking out of her office . that bitch got me tight so i went to the bathroom to smoke a ciggerett real quick . back at school was an ordinary day until i saw the new boy , light skined , dreads, and a sexy ass body who is that i asked chardonnay ,oh that kevin he's new may if you had been in school for the past week you would have known just saying .  i looked at kevin as another piece of art of my collection . i walked over to his table a little bit later where he was sitting alone . hey i said in a really sluty voice. hey wassup he replied in a really deep tone . that had me feelin the vibration and i thought i had him right where i wanted him until he said , i could you are anoter smut walking around here feening for attention, but you aint gonna get non from me looking like a hoe , now cover up yourself and move from my table. i wouldn't move so he got up and left. i sat there feeling stupid , for the first time had been rejected ,i felt tears running down my face and thats when i knew that i really wanted him. it not called rejection , its called caring ia voice said over my head, it was kevin . when i turned around and he saw the tears ,he walked away without saying another word Publication Date: May 26th 2013 https://www.bookrix.com/-kadailia.
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-mercedes-clemons-emo-life-love/
Mercedes Clemons emo life love hate me Prologue "NO PLEASE DAD NO!"I cried in my sleep.I Woke up to my mom rocking me back and forth saying,"Its okay honey its okay."I didn't say anything I jus cried all night in my moms arms.When my dad died my life went from love to hate in five seconds i couldn't help but hate everyone even my mom,which hurt me the most,because i don't want her to think I'm blaming this all on her I love her so much but sometimes i just snap!I see people everyday with both there parents and it just makes everything worse It hurts so much! CHAPTER 1.Honesty "BEEP!BEEP!BEEP!" I leaned over to punch my alarm off!"Honey wake up!"My mom screamed from the shower.Shutup mom i know!i thought.I jumped in the shower as soon as possible to clear my thoughts about last night, but the more i put shampoo and my hair the more i want to run and hide and curl myself in a ball for no important reason.When i got out of the shower i decided to wear my nerd outfit you know the skinny jeans,with suspenders,black shirt,and nerd glasses! Today i decided to stop thinking about my dad,and have a good day.When i got in THE BOOKS NOIT FINISHED YET I JUST STARTED BUHT COMMENT IF YHU LIKE THE BEGING SO FAR Publication Date: August 11th 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-inspiredtoread
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-lt-3u-what-a-wonderful-world/
&lt;3u What a Wonderful World                       No fair to see you go                       A life you'll never know                       Small and loved by me                       Heaven you shall see                       But for now I say good bye                       As I try not to cry  My little brother, Alex, laid on the hospital bed breathing quietly. My parents stood by the bed looking down at their son that would soon be leaving them.   Two years ago Alex had been diagnosed with leukemia. Now he was loosing the fight and falling further and further from me.   I sang " What a Wonderful World" to him. It was his favorite song.   The monitor began to beep less and my mom let out a squeak. I squeezed his hand and continued to sing. He turned his head at me and I looked into his soft brown eyes. He smiled and the monitor stopped beeping.   I ceased my singing and backed away. My mom flung herself over him and my dad walked to the window and held his head.   I shook my head. It was so unfair! Why would God take a six year old from the world? He hadn't even lived yet.  I walked into the hall and sat on one of the couches. Nurses and a doctor walked into the room. I heard my mom crying.   I started to cry and I brought my knees to my chest. I felt someone sit next to me and I stopped. It was a young man. Had to have just turned twenty. He looked strong and wore a Yale t-shirt. He was dark for a white boy, but his eyes were light blue.   " Why are you crying? If you don't mind me asking." he whispered as if his voice would scare me away.   " I'm in a hospital. I think that answers most of it." I whispered.   He nodded and looked at the floor. " Yeah, I guess no one is happy when in a hospital. Unless their having a baby."   " Why are you here?" I asked.   " My mom was in a car accident." he looked back up at me and I saw a tear form in his eye.   " Im sorry." I whispered.   " It's not your fault. I'm sure you weren't the drunk driver that hit her." he smiled meekly.   " You never know."   " Why are you here?" he asked.   " My brother had leukemia. He just died." I whispered and laid my head on my knees. Tears fell from my eyes again.   " I'm sorry." he whispered and patted my back.   " Not like you gave it to him. There was nothing you could do." I whispered.   " You never know."   I looked at him and smiled.   " How old are you?" he asked.   " Sixteen."   " Nineteen. It's Christian by the way." he put out his hand.  " Valicia." his hand was warm and firm.   My mom came out and fell to the floor crying and my dad held her. I looked away and began to cry again. Christian pulled me to him and patted my back. He made soothing sounds as I cried into his chest.   I heard squeaky wheels roll by and knew it was Alex being rolled away to the morgue. Christian hugged me harder when it passed by.   I stopped crying and wiped my tears. " Sorry." I whispered.   " It's fine. I don't expect anything else from you."   I looked at the floor. It hurt so much to know that Alex was gone.   Christian pulled a magazine from the table and grabbed a pin. He ripped one of the corners and wrote something on it. He handed the paper to me.   " If your ever in trouble call that number. It's mine. And will always be mine. It was very nice meeting you." he stood and began to walk away. Then he stopped and turned back to me. He knelt in front of me. " And please, even though it seems the right thing to do, don't cry. Your too pretty to cry." he brushed away a tear with his thumb.   " I won't." I whispered staring into his deep blue eyes.   He smiled and kissed my forehead. I watched him leave and wished desperately that I could leave with him.                      I hide not see                     Clash of a war, love it can't be                     Tears of hate and cries of pain                     I hear the drum of rain                     Destruction you flee                     Yet you leave me                     The war subsides                     I flow with the swift of the tides    A crash of plate sounded in the living room where my parents fought. It has been two months since Alex had left us, and ever since then my mom has been angered by something. The loss of her son had sent her into a frenzy of outbursts. It was unsafe to go near her. Say one wrong thing and she yells; complain, she yells; ask for anything, she yells.   My dad had accidentally stepped on her foot and, well, she started to yell. I left the room an decided to hide in my room, scared of being hit by the flying plates. I heard my dad yell and another smash sounded.   Everything stopped and I looked at my closed door. I heard my mom crying and I got up. The front door slammed and my mom cried more. I walked out and stepped on glass in my hurried steps. My mom lay curled up and crying, but my dad was gone. I looked out the front window and saw him driving away.   I forgot about my stabbed foot and ran outside. I cried for him to turn around but he continued, not looking back. I fell on the sidewalk as my neighbors came out of their houses to see what was going on.   I ran back inside my house and slammed my door. I pushed things around and searched through papers, while holding back tears that wanted to leave me as well. I finally found the crumpled corner of paper with a number scribbled into it. I grabbed the house phone and dialed the number. It rang once and then was answered.  " Hello?" Christian asked and it felt so nice to hear his voice. After that day in the hospital he had been all I would think of.   " It's me Valicia." I said.   " Valicia. Are you okay?" he asked with a kind tone to his voice.   " My dad just left us. I need you to take me somewhere. If your okay with that." I said.   " I'm sorry to hear. Where do you want me to get you? Wait, where would you be going? Would you be safe there? Does your mom know your leaving?" he asked.   " My mom will not know. But it's my aunts house and it's much safer than here. Please take me away from here. I'll meet you at the movie theater."   " I don't know. Are you sure?"   " Yes. Please." I felt a tear roll down my cheek and I wiped it away fiercely.   " Okay. I'll be there in half an hour."   " Thank you."   " Your welcome. Bye."  " Bye. " I hung the phone up and grabbed my suitcase. I stuffed my clothes in it and shoes. I opened my door and looked around my mom was in her room. I grabbed a pair of boots and went to put them on when I remembered the glass in my foot. It was a big chunk and was embedded into the middle of my foot. Blood was dried around it. I grabbed it and pulled. It came out. Blood rushed out. I grabbed a wrap and bandaged my foot. It was numb.   I pulled the boots on and grabbed a sweater. I ran to the movie theater which was right behind my house and saw Christian waiting by a truck. He hugged me and put my stuff in his car.   " Where is you aunts house at?" he asked opening the passenger door for me.   " It's in Manteca."   " What about your school?" he asked.   " I'll go to a different one." he closed the door and walked over to the driver side.   " Are you still at Yale?" I asked.   " Yes. I'm just on winter break at the moment." he said pulling away.   " Do you like it there?"   " Yes. Now are you okay?"  " Yes, I'm fine." I whispered looking out the window at the dark winter clouds.   He looked at me when we stopped at a red light. " You know this is technically illegal. Me taking you away. Your a minor compared to me." he said.   " The government will get over it." I said. I wished I was older. Then I would just ask to stay with him.   " I guess they will." he drove on. His right hand laid in the middle section and I held back the urge to grab it with my own. Instead I set my hand next to his and looked out the window.   " You look very beautiful today." he said still looking ahead.   " You the same." I said.   He smiled and his blue eyes glittered. " Thank you. I try my best."   I smiled forgetting for the moment about my family. I looked back out the window and gasped. Alex was running on the side walk. He was smiling.   Christian looked at me with concern and searched for what I was looking at. " What's wrong?" he asked.   " Nothing. I just thought I saw something." I said.   He nodded and then grabbed my hand. " I'm sorry that this is all happening to you." he whispered.   I lightly held his hand as love and joy filled me. " How is your mom?" I asked.   " Shes better. Just a little bruised and her leg is still broke. But she's okay." he said.   " That's good to hear." I said. He let go of my hand and I pulled mine away, much rejected.   We stopped again. " So where in Manteca is she?"   " Bronzon road. I'll show you the way when we get there." I said.   He nodded and looked at me again. " What color are your eyes?"   " There gray and blue." I said. My eyes had always been my most beauty. With my dark tanned skin they fit well.   " I've never seen or heard of eyes like those." he whispered, mystified.   " Yeah, most haven't. Especially on a Mexican. It's very rare." I said. He drove on and all small talk was gone for the rest of the way was spent with me telling directions.   When we got to my aunts house he helped me with my stuff. I stood in front of the house with him.   " Remember if you ever need anything just call me and I'll come and get you."   Rain began to fall and I cringed as an icy drop fell on my cheek. He wiped it away and smiled at me. " Good- bye." he said.   He hugged me and I quickly kissed his cheek. He smiled, surprised. " Good-bye." I said and walked up to the house. I walked in and looked out the window. He still stood there smiling. He finally left.   Never did I know that I wouldn't see him for a very long time after that.                      I fight the drug                     But I feel the tug                     Lost I am                     Never found again                     To fall in the dark                     To loose to lark                     I fight and unknown                     But I breathe it in as my own  After a month I was kicked out. My aunt didn't want me any more. She said I had an attitude but I knew it was because her boyfriends looked at me more than her. I didn't call Christian when I was kicked out. I was sure he didn't want me bothering him again. Instead I walked the streets, homeless.   I often saw Alex. He would never smile though. He would always seem so sad. He would point at a phone as if to tell me to call Christian. I never did though.   One day a woman came staggering over to me and told me she would give me a home. I agreed and walked to her house. When she opened the door to the broke and drab house I saw a mess. Trash was thrown anywhere and groups of people huddled together. Children dressed in old tattered clothes hid from the adults.   " What is that?" I asked looking at the white powder the sat on a piece of paper.   " It's crack!" the woman giggled.   I looked at her with fear and terror. I was in a crack house.   She grabbed my arm and led me threw a hall. She opened the door to a room. There were two mattresses and one was taken by three people sleeping quietly.   I nodded my thanks even though there was none.   " What is your name?" I asked her.   " Donna. What's yours?" she asked.   " Valicia." I answered.   " Okay then. Come with me." she dragged me back to the living room and sat me down. A guy passed two needles our way. I held one and looked at it.   " Like this." Donna said. She raised the needle to the middle of her arm and stabbed herself. She injected whatever was inside into her. " Now your turn." she said laughing. The guy looked at me expectantly.   I raised the needle and did the same. I looked up and at them. Across the room Alex stood and he shook his head in disappointment.     I woke next to a Bubba, a guy that I was now " seeing". His shirt was off and so was every other piece of clothing. Same with me. I was still sixteen and was now sleeping with a twenty-five year old. In a crack house age meant nothing. I had been here for two months already.  He smiled at me and caressed my face. His breath smelled of filth. " Good mourning." he said.   I smiled back. " Good mourning." I got up and pulled on a shirt and pants, unsure if they were mine or another girls.   A child sat playing with a toy in the hall. She was skinny and I could see the bones popping out of her body. She smiled at me though.   Even though I was messed up, I always seemed to have the right mind to give my food to the kids. And there was maybe five. Soon to be six since one of the other women were pregnant.   Donna came out of a room followed by a thug looking man. He was black and had tattoos everywhere. I could see a gun protruding from his waist. He looked over Bubba and then at me. His eyes lingered on my chest.   " This is T.D. He gives us the stuff!" Donna giggled.    T.D nodded and smiled at me. I hugged Bubba and stated at T.D. They walked past and we followed. Donna and T.D sat at a table and she pulled out money. He rubbed his hands together and pulled out a sack of crack. They swapped and he got up.   Bubba walked over to Donna as T.D advanced toward me. He stopped close to me and moved hair out of my face.   " What's yo name?" he asked.   " Valicia." I said.   He moved closer. " Maybe I should take you from here and show you something good. Would you like that?"   " I don't know." I answered, quiet eager to get to the crack.   " Well when you decided I'll get you." he smiled and walked away.   Bubba looked over at me and ushered me over. I came and smiled at the crack. I put some in a corner and sniffed.   Kalli, the woman who was pregnant, screamed as she pushed her baby out. It had been four months since I had seen T.D. He would often come by to vist me. He said he liked me a lot.   Another scream and everyone jumped around, unsure of what to do. A cry from a baby came and we all looked over. I ran over to her and did what I thought was to be done. I held the baby and with siccors cut the cord. A towel was given to me and I washed the blood off the baby.   It was a girl. I smiled at it as it grabbed my pinky finger. I looked around but everyone had already left. This baby was not important. Kalli was even gone. The other children walked over to me and looked at the baby in awe.   Alex stood next to me and he touched the baby's forehead. The baby girl responded with a smile in Alex's direction.   I got up and carried the baby to my room and set her on a clear spot of the bed. I pulled out one of my shirts and wrapped it around the baby. Children gathered around and stroked the baby.   " What's it name?" asked Renee, my favorite child.   " I don't know. What shall we name her?" I asked smiling at the kids.   " I think her name sho be Princess." said a two year old girl.   " No! It should be Rex!" said a three year old boy with a smile upon his skinny face.   " It should be Valicia, like it's new mommy." said Renee.   " Yeah."  " Yes."   " Mmhmm."   I smiled at the name chosen but my heart sunk when I heard the announcement of me being the new mommy. I nodded though. " If you guys want it to be." I said.   The baby smiled and a giggle left her throat. I picked her up and rocked her back and forth in my arms. Her cheeks were rosy and her eyes were brown. She was cute baby. But I knew she would have problems later on since she was a crack baby. I held her close.  The children began to leave to their tent in the backyard to play. I sat with the baby on the bed and I thought of Christian. I wondered if he had ever come to my aunts house looking for me. Probably not. He is probably off with a girlfriend and not even giving a thought to how I was.   The baby began to cry and I tried to think of something to make it stop. It was obviously hungry. What was I suppose to do though? I had no milk in my breasts. There was no formula. I looked around and saw Bubbas wallet sitting on the ground. A twenty popped out of it. I grabbed it and looked inside. There was a hundred dollars. I took fifty and stuffed it in my pocket. I set the baby down and went to the bathroom. I quickly showered and pulled my hair back. I threw on clothes and gathered the kids. We walked down street after street until we reached a Walmart. I went and bought formula and a bottle for the baby and fed the kids.   People watched us, unsure of why I had so many kids and why we all looked like trash. I began to bounce, my body was wanting drugs. The kids ate three hamburgers, two fries, and drank one large soda each. I asked if they could warm the formula and they did. The baby drank closing its eyes in happiness.   A man stared at me from across the room and I felt like I knew him. I suddenly felt ashamed of how I looked. I saw something walk up from behind him. Alex hugged the mans leg and I realized that it was my dad. I hadn't seen him in more than half a year. He seemed to have aged. He know had stubble along his chin and he looked weaker. I saw a tear fall from his eye as he looked at me.   " Valicia, who is that?" asked Renee.   " It's my dad." I said in almost a whisper.   " Really? Why don't you say hi?" she asked smiling at my dad.   " I don't think I should." I said.   My dad looked away and began to walk. Another tear fell from his eye. It must hurt to see your daughter surrounded by kids and dressed like a junkie. Alex walked after him and smiled knowing he was next to his dad again.   " Come on. I think it's time we left." I said standing. The little Valicia now slept in my arms. The kids cleaned their mess and followed me out the door. It was almost dark and we walked fast to get to our home.   When we got back I set the baby in the attic, where I would be sleeping tonight. I walked down to the living room and was greeted with crack and meth being shoved in my face.   I grabbed the needle and injected myself. Alex again showed but the smile was gone.   I woke with a start. Renee shook me and I could see tears rolling down her face. I looked at my side and saw that the baby was gone.   " What is it sweetheart?" I asked.   " They took the baby. It's dead. They drowned it!" she sobbed and I pulled her closer. She then straightened and ushered for me to follow.   I was led to a bathroom and she pointed to the bathtub. I looked in and cringed away, holding Renee close to me. The baby lay face down in the water. I took her out of there right when T.D came up.   He pushed Renee out of the way and pulled me close. Renee left, quiet heart broken. T.D kissed my neck and I smelt alcohol all over him. " When will I be able to take you away from this dump?" he said.   " When I feel like it." he pulled back and I felt his hand reach up my shirt.   " I think that should be now." he smiled.   I backed away and walked up to the attic. T.D came after me and pulled me toward him. Bubba then turned the corner and I saw his eyes flare in anger.   I stepped away as Bubba hit T.D. They started to fight and I grabbed Renee. I dragged her outside and I pulled the other kids toward me. I heard gunshots and the kids jumped and gasped. Screaming could be heard from inside. I shook my head. My baby was dead and now so would Bubba. Renee cried and I stroked her hair.   Alex sat next to me and he leaned his head on my shoulder. Everything stopped and was silent. Then sirens blared. I stood quickly and gathered the kids around me. A dog came sprinting into the back and began to bark at us. One of the little girls began to cry and a boy tried to shoo it away. A police officer came through the fence and looked at us, shocked.   Others came and collected the kids. I was then dragged to the cop car and shoved inside. I hung my head and cried quietly. I prayed that the children would be safe and that Alex would take care of my little Valicia.                         I feel such grace                        But not able to see your face                        I praise you in song                        I shall worship you long                        Forgiven I feel                        Love so real                        Give me faith                        As you gave me a break                         I sing your name                        My demons remain tame        I sat in a corner of my cell and I rocked back and forth. My body cried for drugs and I felt sick. The prison gaurds said I was 'searching' as they called it. I was put in a room alone where I would stay off the drug and find myself again.   I longed for Christian and to be back at home with everyone. I hated my cell. I was so closed in and tight in it. I felt crushed and trapped. I had no where to go. I rocked back and forth and thought of Renee and the children. I thought of how the baby hadn't even lived more than two days. I thought of how Bubba was dead and T.D imprisoned. I thought of Donna and wondered where she would be now.   I thought of how my thinking made me crazier.   At the jail I was required to wash, cook, workout, pick up trash, and attend church service.   I actually like the church service. Before I never went to church but my family called themselves Christians. The preacher was also very moving.   Her name was Amelia. She always wore black slacks and a white blouse. Her blond hair was always curled in perfect ringlets and she wore a gold cross. Her blue rimmed glasses magnified her green eyes and she spoke with a clear voice.   She told us how when she was a child, she was homeless. When she was fourteen she had been raped and bore a child. She told us how she wanted to quit so badly but held on. Then when twenty, with a six year old child, a pastor gave her an apartment. He bought her food and clothes.   She then went to church with him. Now she wanted to preach the word of God and teach other young women the word of God.   I often cried in service because I would see Alex. I felt ashamed to see him. I felt as if I had let him down more than anyone.   I would also think of Christian when at church. What would he say if he saw me here? Would he shun me and never see me again? I often wanted to ask if I could call him, since I still had his number. I kept it next to my heart all the time.   " Today we are going to talk about reason. What is the reason for sound wrong? Anyone?" Amelia asked.   A girl called Lila raised her hand. She was a scary looking woman. Her muscles were bigger than the guards and her hair was always in a big fat braid. " My reason was because my dad messed me up. He beat me so one day I beat him back." her voice was flat as she spoke.   Another girl raised her hand. She was very small and looked frightened. " I stabbed my boyfriend because he broke my arm." she was very quiet and it reminded me of Renee.   " Those reasons are like retaliations. Do you know what retaliations are?" Amelia asked.   I raised my hand, not knowing that I was. " Retaliations are the actions of harming someone because they harmed you. It's like revenge." I said.   " Yes. Now retaliations are not much of reasons as they are revenge. I mean like you wanted a candy bar so you bought it. The reason you bought the candy bar was because you wanted it. Do you understand?"   We all nodded. I thought to myself for a moment. What was my reason for being here? Was it my aunt kicking me out? Was it my dad leaving? Was it Alex dying?   I raised my hand again. " I got on drugs because I fell to the temptation." I said.   " That is what I was looking for! It is no one else's fault for what you do. It is your own fault. Your reason to do something is not because of what happened to you before. Your reason is because you had no strength left in you to make the right choice. Now this isn't wrong of you. Many make wrong choices and they have no reason to but they didn't make the right choice."   I thought of Alex again. Why wasn't be able to choose his fate? I wondered where I would be if Alex hadn't died. It was a mystery to me.   I twisted and turned in my bed. It hurt so much. My body was wanting something that I could never have while here. I ached and thought of a way to escape. Maybe if I got out I'd be able to get the drug. Get my life source.   No! I couldn't! There was no way out!  I rocked back and forth and breathed heavily. I was killing myself. It was like dying from the inside out. It hurt so much. I wanted it to end but it wouldn't. It continued.   It hurt.  It hurt so much.  I sat at a conference table and waited to see who wanted to talk to me. I wished it was Christian, coming to save me from here.   Instead a man in a black suit sat down at my table. He was a short, squat man with almost no neck and all chin. He put a brown brief case on the table and took out a piece of paper.   " Ms. Valicia Mariano?"  " Yes."   " I am sorry to tell you but your mother has died of an overdose on pain killers. We have been searching for you since March. It is now October. I'm very sorry." his voice implied no sorriness.   I nodded and thought of how long it had been. She must have died right after I left. It had been nine months. My birthday was in a month. How life moved so fast.   I stood. " Thank you for telling me." walking to the guard I wiped a tear from my eye.   Alex held my hand as I walked back to my cell.   I cried in my cell. Something had just come over me. I had knelt down to pray, like Amelia said to do, and I began to cry.  There was a section on my back that felt warmer than the rest, like a hand was resting there. Joy and sorrow washed over me and I cried until I couldn't breath.   I cried for Alex. I cried for my mom and dad. I cried for Christian. I cried for Donna and Bubba. I cried for Renee and the other children. I cried for Amelia. I cried for myself.   I was only sixteen and was already this far in life.    What was I doing with my life?  I fell to the floor and cried in joy as I remembered times with Alex. Or times with Christian. I wanted them all back.    All back in my reach.   I stood with the other girls in lines at the church. We held music books and listened to Amelia.   " Okay, now you all will have a turn to sing by yourself. If you don't want to sing, too bad. Everyone is singing. Now flip to page twenty and review the song you will sing." she said and sat down at the piano.   I looked at the page. It was an easy song. The name was This Little Light of Mine. It was short and a quick sing.   A girl walked to the front and the piano sounded. After twelve girls I realized that not everyone had a good voice. Many cracked and faltered.   I was last. I walked up an looked at the music book. I felt nervous. " This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine..." I lost track of everything but I knew I was singing. When I finished I looked at Amelia and she smiled.   " That was beautiful." she whispered.   Alex was clapping in the audience.                       Fists of fury                      Anger we bury                      Blood it splatters                       Clothes in tatters                      Beat of a heart                      Sour and tart                       Stand tall                      Never fall  There was one girl who did not like me. Her name was Irene and she despised me. She said I was a prick and frufru suck up.   I thought she was a stupid whore and looked like a monkey. Many others believed this too.   When we walked past eachother, we would mug eachother and sometimes bump, pushing the other one into a person or wall.   We never fought. We only did small things to piss off the other. It was our quiet war.   I sat down at the table and picked up the sandwich. I looked at it deciding of I should eat the monster. I finally did. Hunger wasn't worth it.   The doors banged open and everyone looked at the girl that walked in. She was really thin but seemed strong. She had three tear drops and on her knuckles was "Sad Girl" She was the new member of our happy family.   I turned back to my food and ate. I didn't care where she was going. I saw Irene looking at me from another table. Hate, plain simple hate.   I always wondered why there was so much hate between us, but it was as it is.   Everything went silent for a moment an I saw Irene's expression change. From hate to fear. I frowned and thought for a moment on why she looked that way but then the answer came.   My face was slammed into the table again and again. Hair was jerked from my head and a fist jabbed my stomach.   " You fucking slut! Fucking talking to my T.D!" Sad Girl screamed. Everyone got up and formed a circle around the fight.   I took my fork and stabbed backward, hitting the stomach of my attacker. She pulled away and I stood. Blood spilled from my nose.   I punch her and got on top. I hit her some more until her nose broke and her lip piercing rip out. I felt a tray slam into my head as she lugged it at me. I fell to the side and she was now on top. SJ grabbed my head again and moved it to a sharp point in the floor she raised my head but stopped.   She rose into the air as Irene pulled her from the neck. Sad Girl scratch at Irene's arms but nothing happened. Irene began to hit her head with the other hand and then Sad Girl went limp.   Guards came and put us all in different places. I stared at Irene puzzled. Why would she save me? I thought we were enemy's?   I was dragged away to the medical room but I stated at Irene, still puzzled.   I was brought outside and was given a hammer. I was to do that old thing, where you crush rocks for gravel. My feet were chained and I could barely move. The bitter air of October bit at my skin.   I looked down the line and saw Irene. She nodded at me but did nothing else.   " Why did you save me?" I asked after sometime in quiet.   " I wanted to." she said not looking up from her work.   " But I thought you didn't like me? I thought I was nothing to you?"   " Your not nothing. Your just annoying at times. But I felt bad your oh what twelve? I didn't think you should get your ass beat." she said.   " I'm sixteen. Seventeen in a month." I snapped.  She raised her hands and saved them around.   " Thanks though. I appreciate it."   " Don't get sappy with me."   " I'm going to. And then were going to be best friends and have slimmer parties and make friendship bracelets." I said in a really fast annoying voice.   She laughed and I began to laugh too.   " Get to work!" a guard yelled.   We went quiet but giggled every so often.   Sad Girl continued to harass me. Now the looks I had gotten from Irene, we're given to me from Sad Girl.   It was strange how she new T.D and even stranger how she found out. Not like me and T.D had ever done anything.   Hate still radiated. But would vanish when Irene was with me. Now that hate had gotten passed the both of us, we stuck together. Never letting anything happen to the other.   I told her about I had gotten here and she told me how she did. Apparently, she was here on false charges. She was framed but some guy who didn't like her. He had gone to the cops and said that she had crack and pot stashed in her house. He had also put the drugs there. Now she was here serving her last two years.   I felt bad when I heard but she said that I didn't matter to her. Being in prison had taught her a lot.   She would talk of her little sister alot. She was now a very successful lawyer in New York. She was really proud of her.   I spoke of Alex and I told her how I saw him at times. She seemed a little puzzled by it but didn't care much.   We were now friends. First in a long time.                          Bound by valor                        Feel the power                       Letters of love                       Find thy dove                       Blood and fury                       Home you hurry                       Picture keep                       Love runs deep  We were all gathered into the big hall and sat down in chairs. A tv was put at the front and turned on.   It was a news report. It showed a tall Asian man ordering his armies to go forth and did their jobs. There were images of piled dead and burned houses.   " These are the chilling images of the 'new hitler'. His name is Chitdan and believes that Christians are filth and should be demolished. We have found from researchers that he plans on attacking America next. Armies have been formed and many are applying."  The image then shifted to men and women standing in a line waving at the camera. It paused on another reporter with four men behind him.   I jumped up my heart pounding. " No!" I yelled.   A smiling blue eyed man waved at the camera. Christian had gotten so more muscled and taller. Irene touched my arm, unsure of what was going on.   A tear fell from my eye as I realized that Christian might die. I felt lost once more.   I pulled out a piece of paper and pen and wrote:     Dear Christian,          It's me Valicia. I've been through a lot since I last saw you. Ummm, well I know you'll get mad but after you left I was kicked out a month later and moved into a crack house. Now I'm in prison. I'm sorry. You probably have a wife now and I'd like to see what she looks like. Oh yeah I'm now seventeen! My birthday was on October 10th. My friend Irene got me a cookie so I guess presents weren't much. I miss you a lot. I hope that if you ever have time that you would write back. Only if you want though. Well I love you. Be safe.  Valicia.  I sealed the letter and gave it to Amelia. She then mailed it and I waited for the response.   It finally came, with a small teddy bear. It read:  Dear Valicia,        I will never be mad at you. But you should hav called me and I would have gotten you. I sent you a bear for your birthday. I hope it got to you well. I do not have a wife so you know. I didn't even date. My heart was for someone I couldn't have. I will write every chance I get and keep you updated. My prays are with you and I love you too. Stay strong and know that I will always be there for you. Write back.  Christian.  After that I sent him a picture of me telling him that it would keep him safe. He sent one back and told me it would give me strength. I lived for his letters. It's what made me happy an not so sad.   He sent presents a lot and told me the least gruesome details of the war.   It hurt him a lot to be killing but he said every time he got a letter from me he felt better. Alex smiled more and so did I.   I had my Christian back.                    I hear a voice of beauty                   A voice I want for me                   Let it bring the world together                   Let it make life better                   Sing for joy                   Never selfish the toy                   Yet you bring it down                   And it runs never to be found                   In dark it runs                   The angel sung  I sat in a office with Amelia. A man also sat with us, holding a briefcase in one hand and a contract in the other.   " Valicia, I believe that when you get out of this place you'll do something great with that voice of yours. I could make you a star! Whata say?" he smiled with enthusiasm.   I looked at Amelia for help and she nodded her head. " You'll be out in a month. I think it will be a really good thing for you to do." she said sweetly.   " I have to think about it." I mumbled. I got up and walked away. Maybe this was it. Maybe something good would happen now.   Alex stood outside and he smiled, clapping his hands rapidly.   " A singing job? Well, are you gonna take it? I think it would be a good thing to do." Irene said lounging in a chair.   " I don't know. It just doesn't seem like me. I mean I get out of jail and now I'm a singer. It just seems to fast."  " Why don't you write to Christian. See what he thinks about this." she suggested.   " Yeah I should." I grabbed a piece of paper and began to write.   " Tell him that I said hi." she said. Now every time I wrote Irene talked to him too through the letters. He was fine with it. On Christmas he even sent her a present.   I sealed the letter and gave it to the guard so he could mail it. I sat down next to Irene and sighed.   " You love that guy don't you?" she asked.  I nodded smiling at the floor. "Maybe it was just because he was there in my time of need, but I never thought I would ever like someone like I do him."  A smile spread across her face. "Awe my girl got a lover!" she said.   " No! I don't think he loves me back." I mumbled.   " Yeah he does! Look at you. And have you read the sweet things he's said to you. I have and it sounds like love to me." she said, pulling me into a hug.   I was silent. Maybe he did. But what would it matter. He's in the army and I'm in prison.     A letter came from Christian. It was enthusiastic and encouraging me to accept. He also said he would be coming back to America for a month to visit.   He sent another teddy bear and his love.   I felt my heart lift high in the air as I held the teddy bear. I had atleast twenty now.   I sat down next to Irene and she nudged me.   " I'm proud of you. Your going to be a superstar and I get to call you my friend." she said.   " I wish Christian were here." I mumbled.   " I know you do kid." she whispered.   I sat on my bed and looked around. I was finally leaving. I grabbed my bag and stood. The record producer waited outside.   Irene came up and gave me a hug. I saw a tear form in her eye but I didn't say anything about it. In our silence our friendship was told.  Amelia came out to see me. " I'll miss you." she whispered and hugged me tightly. I looked at them both and smiled. I then stepped into the car and closed the door.   I sat looking out the window at the place I had called home as I drove to my new future.   " Now sing that all again and this time no mess ups or pauses." I had been in the studio for five hours now.   I began to sing, again. " Ohh tell me tell me. Why did you leave break weave. Hoooold onto lost memories.." I was done and I looked at the producer and studio worker. They nodded and I took the headphones off.   The studio worker left and the producer came in.   His name was Matthew and was the best producer out there. He sat next to me.   " You're doing really well. I think that you'll go all the way." he said.   I smiled to myself. " Really?"   " Oh yeah sure. You got it. Composer. The voice. The looks." each pause he moved closer.   I scooted away.   " Oh come on. This would get you even farther into life. And it would get me pretty far too." he smiled down at me.   I pushed him away but he grabbed me. " Stop!" I yelled hoping someone would hear.   " Shut up! Now come on be a good girl." he said holding me tighter.   I kicked up and he fell to the floor holding his stomach. I grabbed my wallet and ran. I vanished into the deep parts of L.A. And stopped.   I was back in the ghetto.   I was back where I started.   I huddled up next to a pay phone. I had called Christian ten times already. Each time he didn't answer. Alex sat with me, looking at me with concern.   I hummed softly, trying to sooth myself. What a Wonderful World played again and again. I held onto the song as if it were a life source. It was my life source.   I felt rejected and lost. I wanted to go back to the prison and stay there. At least there I knew I was safe.   Here I was lost.   I stood and grabbed the phone again. I dialed and let it ring.   Finally someone picked up. A giggling girl answered. " Hello." she laughed.   " Hi. Is Christian there?" I asked feeling lost even more by hearing a girl answer his phone.   " No. He's busy. Bye." there was more laughing and I didn't care much to know what "busy" meant.   I slammed the phone down and left.   It was over. I was meant for the streets. It was the only home I had.   I unfolded my coat and laid on top. The cold wind stung at my cheeks. The night engulfed me slowly as the last rays of light left the world. I longed for Christian and for love. It had been so long since I had felt that warm feeling of love from anyone.   My head hurt and I felt sick. I hated it all. My life was going nowhere and I'd be on the street for the rest of my life.   I also bubbled with hate. Christian was messing around with some girl right now while I died slowly in a dark alleyway. Things were just never balanced.                                                                                                                                                                Publication Date: November 3rd 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-bettyboop.4.
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-juliea-christine-escaping-jonestown/
Juliea Christine Escaping Jonestown The Beginning The Beginning “And tomorrow, we will make the trek to Guyana, where we will live in a utopian paradise not found here, where we will live for Christ, and live out our lives without the outside threat of those who wish to destroy us.” Applause erupts from around me, and I have to resist covering my ears with my hands. Beside me, my parent’s faces brighten, as they cheer and clap with uninterrupted enthusiasm. My five year old sister Katie is beside me, confused. Her large emerald eyes search around, noticing the happiness on everyone’s faces. Her lips burst into a smile and she tugs on the leg of my pants. “Luce, why aren’t you happy?” Her smile wilts as she takes in my tense posture. I open my mouth to form a lie, but I can’t bring myself to it. How do I cover for the fact that I feel we are in incredible danger? “Lucy,” My parents are looking down at me, disappointed, “You’re being rude to Father. Please show your appreciation.” I looked up at my dad, “Funny, I thought you were my father.” I cross my arms, and the scowl, but turn away. I feel my sister’s fingers intertwine into mine and I feel bad for scaring her. Forcing a smile, I pick her up into my arms and tell her to clap. She beams at me and joins in with my parents. A prickly feeling erupts all over my skin, and the scene in front of me seems to fade into shadows and blocks of colors. Our leader, the ever so admired Father Jones, appears to me like a scream of red. Whenever I picture the idea of a god, I think of bright light and purity. The opposite stands before me, and I can’t help but shiver as I watch him grin at his followers, knowing he controls us, knowing that nothing will stop him. The idea is terrifying, but not quite as terrifying as this same setting in a distant, lone jungle. The next thing I know, I’m being ushered out, along with my family. The next hours pass by in a haze, we pack and ready ourselves, but none of it feels good enough. I walk across the hardwood floors of our condo, kissing whatever independence we had left goodbye. I wasn’t sure how long we would be staying in Guyana, but the thought of never coming back made me ill. I found myself slouched over the toilet, spewing up the little amount of food I had eaten. “Luce…” Katie’s soft voice alarms me. “I’ll be out in a minute.” I flush the toilet and make a quick attempt of brushing my teeth and washing my face. “Bathroom’s free.” Smiling, I go to leave her, but she blocks my path with her little form. “What’s happening, Luce?” Tears form in her eyes, “Where are we going tomorrow?” “Katie, listen to me. Don’t question anything in front of anyone else. No matter what happens, I am always your sister and I will always be there for you.” Fear instills us both and I let her sleep in my bed. It is the last night I will live here, and it is the last night a sense of safety will cover me like the warm blanket that adorns us. I snuggle against her, my hand brushing through her sort hair. “Goodnight, Katie.” My eyes close at last, and I relax as my dream world closes in, offering me a peaceful recluse from reality. Into the Jungle Into the Jungle The light hit my eyes in a bright, sharp way. The sky was clear, filled with nothing to block the intense sunlight. We’ve been here barely three days, and already we were split into groups and sent to work in the fields. Some of the women were working in the bakery, preparing and cooking food. My sister Katie was helping bake bread, which was a positive aspect on such a hot day. The weeds seemed to possess no desire to leave as I hacked away, doing no harm. My muscles already cried out, sending a signal that I would be sore tomorrow. With no clue where either of my parents was, I felt alone. The structures we were to live in were already set up, and several men were still working on building other small houses. Vigorous jungle surrounded the entire camp, with only a windy, unclear road out. Guards lined the edges, armed with rifles and blank expressions. Within the next week, the amount of guards doubled, along with sermons multiple times throughout the day. Parents seemed to become the most involved, and were willing to punish their children if they did not behave. It became quite clear that we must behave. “Luce!” A pair of tiny arms wrapped around my waist. My heart almost stopped as I bent down to hug her. “Katie, follow me. Stay with me.” Happiness began to fill me as we held hands, walking to the dining building. We were required to eat as a family while Jones delivered a speech. A guard watched us, his eyes heavy and black. I shivered as he called another guard over, and the town began whispering. My pace quickened as I spotted empty spots. Looking over my shoulders, the guards were gone. “My people, I have much to say,” His face is serious and unreadable, “I must first start with, that our agricultural work is going as well as I had hoped. This is all thanks to you, your children, your dedication. We must work together, we must be a family. This why we must practice severing ties. The families you came with are now not your only families. Please, listen to me when I say this. Your wife, is no longer just your wife. Your children, are everybody’s children.” I stared up at him with incredulous eyes, as his lips still moved, pronouncing words I did not wished to here. He would tell us of how good we are, and of how good we could be. Then, he would instill a threatened punishment. Now, he was attempting to cut off every ties we had to our parents and siblings. The claim was that he wanted us to know all of our family. “We must practice people. We don’t want to become like the outsides. This is why we must have consequences. This is why we must have guards. If we need to teach you a lesson, it is for the very good of our family.” His eyes scanned the crowd, studying the faces of his followers. The charisma that he seemed to have possessed willed the people to gleam with a light not seen before. My eyes stared back, a cruel and blank expression overcoming me. I didn’t want to show him any satisfaction. His eyes fell on me, and I immediately felt a change in the atmosphere. “Take this as example, this girl, right here. She will not cohort with anyone who is not her sibling. Guards, please, separate the girl and her sister. People, watch, we are making a change, for the good of us all!” People cheered as the guard ripped Katie out of hands. A cry shredded from my throat, and another guards gripped me roughly by the shoulders. My screams grew louder and the guard growled, covering my mouth. Applause grew louder, and I found my sounds made no such impact. I was unheard. Dinner was soon dismissed, and many went back to work. A guard still held me, and I made no attempt to move. Katie was long gone, and I watched as everyone vanished, leaving me with a small amount of guards, and our graceful leader himself. “Lucy,” My heart stopped. How did he know my name? He cleared his throat, “We must learn to work together. You are mine Lucy. Katie is mine too, not just yours.” A sound of anger escaped me, “You can’t take her away. You can’t. You’re a liar if you think I won’t protect her.” His hand harshly slapped across my face, and I held my jaw, surprised. Not that I should be, but the pure jolt of it was a strange reality. I had successfully angered him, and now I was a target. “If you really love your sister you would want to community to protect her. Think wisely, Lucy.” He was gone after a few moments, along with the guards. I was by myself, still holding my jaw. With a tremble, I lowered my hand. I couldn’t help myself as sobs consumed me, making my body shake in a vigorous fashion. My breath was sharp and I couldn’t stop my chest from heaving. I felt in pain, mentally and emotionally. A hand touched my shoulder. I spun around, expecting to see a guard holding me at gunpoint. Instead, a boy, looking to be of my age, was standing behind me, his eyes full of sympathy. “Who are you?” I whispered. He was silent for a few minutes, “My name is Jackson. I was near you when he singled you out. I’m very sorry, and I thought you should know that.” I nodded, confused, “Thank you.” His presence was an odd comfort, and I actually felt a sense of peace with him sitting next to me. He sat for a while, and then his eyes stared into mine. He opened his mouth to say something, but instead stood up, quickly walking away. The Art of Humiliation The Art of Humiliation I had lost track of the days. At first, it had been a need for me to know the days, the times, the months. After a while, I gave up the sense of time, letting myself fully give into Jonestown. The threatened promise had held true, and I barely ever saw Katie. Talking to my parents was a rare treat, but they were too brainwashed to try to put any sense into. I tried to guess what day it was when it happened. Wednesday seemed fitting. The incident made me realize just how dangerous this place really was. Loudspeakers now boomed sermons into ears for hours at a time, but on this particular day, we were told to report to a common area. There was a sort of stage and a podium, with a deep well right next to it. Jones stood erect, a child mumbling with tears next to him. “You see people, why we need punishment, is indeed to teach. And this is what I intend to show you. This boy was caught stealing food today. Food that is for all of us. This is an incredibly selfish act.” Two guards hoisted by the boy and tied his ankles together. I watched in disgust as they dangled him into the well, headfirst. He was crying, his tears streaming down his forehead, soaking his hair and dripping off into the deep, dark hole. The blood rushed to his head, and I watched as his pale skin began to turn into a violent crimson. In my mind, I thought they had every intention of killing him. Yet, at what seemed like the last second, he was pulled up and released. His face was still bright, mixed with incredible fear and hurt. We were dismissed soon after, but as I walked away slowly, I couldn’t get the image of him out of my mind. Another day, another incident. This seemed to prove true as various forms of torture and humiliation took place. Public spankings were frequent, given to both children and adults. Beatings would happen midday, and classes on the belief of socialistic quality became required in the evenings. I listened quietly as his voice rang on the brave and courageous Joseph Stalin, portraying him as a close to perfect leader. Looking over the crowd, I saw once again, everyone seemed to be captivated. Then my stare caught another’s. The boy, named Jackson. We formed an understanding, and I squinted my eyes as he mouthed out a location to meet him at. A tense form of nerves and excitement filled me. I had a desire to talk to him again, though I didn’t even know what about. “You may be dismissed.” This time, I didn’t lag or stay behind. I was determined to stay with the crowd and blend in. Standing out was only a consequence here. After I thought a good amount of time had passed, I went out to the farthest building, next to where most of the agriculture was located. Jackson was already there, sitting and waiting for me. “Hello.” His voice was gentle yet strong. I noticed now how dark his blue eyes were. “Why did you want to meet?” “You seem different,” His tone sounded unsure, “I needed to talk to you.” “But why?” I asked, taking a seat next to him. Out of habit, my hands began tangling in the grass, breaking off the strands and playing with them. “You don’t believe in this,” His words made me nod, “I don’t either. I want to leave.” “There are guards everywhere.” As we spoke, I spotted one passing from afar, signature gun in hand. He nodded, “I know. My parent’s really think that he’s their savior.” “Mine too.” We talked for a while, and he became like a fresh breath of air. There was no real education here, and nor was I able to socialize with anyone my age. He was 16, only a year older than I was. We were both in the same situation. “I’ve never had a girlfriend.” He admitted after a while. “I’ve had a boyfriend,” I smiled, “But I’ve never been kissed. He was too shy.” He turned his head to face me, and I found our hands intertwine. Things became like slow motion, and I couldn’t stop myself from kissing back when his lips met mine. It was a unfamiliar sensation, but I found that I didn’t want to stop. My arms wrapped around his shoulders and I showed no resistance as he pulled me close. The pure bliss of the action separated us from our surroundings. He pulled back, “We need to get going. I’ll see you soon.” I looked around, realizing how late it was. He kissed me once more, providing that same sensation. He ran off, out of the sight of the guards. I walked back to my living quarters, my heart beating quickly, not out of fear, but out of excitement. Being removed from normal life, I longed for the things that normal teenagers had. My first kiss had fulfilled my expectations, but left me confused and slightly frightened. Talks of Suicide Talks of Suicide Jackson and I began spending time together at night, escaping the civilized wilderness that encased us. We would stay out of sight from eyes, talking of a future in which we were told not to think. Our hands would remain tightly laced, not wanting to separate from the only thing keeping each other sane. “Lucy,” His fingers made their way into my dark hair, “I want to see you after we get out of here.” A quick smile formed, and then vanished, “If we get out of here.” My voice was dark, but I really was only being realistic. “We will, promise.” His arms, much stronger than mine, wrapped around me and held me in a comforting position. I let my eyes close, drifting off into a happier place. I would have to go back soon, but all I wanted was for him to keep me, to let me sleep in his arms. I held on to the world for as long as possible, but soon I had fallen into dream land. “Wake up.” The cold voice made my eyes open, and I found myself face to face with none other than a burly, angered guard. I was still touching Jackson, and I winced as the guard grabbed his wrist violently, putting the gun to his head and telling him to leave. He refused, not wanting to leave without me. My heart sunk as the guard raised his gun. “No!” I latched onto the guard, “Please, don’t hurt him. Jackson, leave!” Jackson gave me one final look before running off. I know he didn’t want to leave me, but he staying meant more trouble for the both of us, possibly even death. “Come.” I had no choice as I was hoisted up, being tugged on by a muscular pair of hands. My shoulder stung, and I felt as if it were being dragged out of its socket. I was desperately trying to keep up, but I ended up being dragged across the dirt, my knees becoming bloodied in the process. “Where am I going?” My voice cracked, and went unheard on the guards ears. I saw that there was a gathering of people, right along the stage. My eyes widened. I was going to be punished. I was going to be held head first down a well, or stuffed into a box, or beaten half to death. And what would happen to Jackson? I assume worst. My head spun, and I felt shocked as the guard simply dropped me, walking away. The crowd looked afraid, and I was unsure of what was going on. “What’s happening?” I asked a woman, who looked especially panic stricken. “Outsiders!” She shrieked back at me, her shrill voice making me wish I hadn’t chosen her to ask. I was still confused, but as our leader climbed on stage, I couldn’t help but be relieved that it wasn’t about me. “There are outside forces,” He spoke grimly, “And they want to infiltrate, hurt and destroy our purity. They are against everything we stand for. They are fully willing to hunt us down and destroy us all.” His voice was booming, and the little children were starting to get scared. My ankle was grabbed, scaring me as well. I turned, afraid. My smile grew as I saw Katie. “Luce, what is he talking about?” “I don’t know,” I whispered, honestly unsure, “I didn’t think anybody could even reach us, with how remote the jungle is.” “You must understand,” He clasps his hands together in a sympathetic fashion, “ We will be forced to leave earth if these outsiders keep returning.” “What do you mean?” Asked a daring woman in the front. “If needed be, we have an escape plan. We will all go out together. Together we will raise our glasses and see to the end. Will a carefully planned mixture of cyanide and relaxers, we can escape.” Applause. My mouth dropped open. How could anybody dare applaud someone who wished for us all to kill ourselves? Why should we drink poison for his own paranoia? I held Katie closer, knowing that I couldn’t let anyone separate us again. We needed to escape, or we would surely die here soon. Publication Date: July 12th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-julieachristine
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-leslie-thompson-the-dragon/
Leslie Thompson The Dragon Publication Date: November 30th 2009 https://www.bookrix.com/-lesliethompson
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-kaylyn-gregory-jeff-the-killer-039-s-story/
Kaylyn Gregory Jeff The Killer's Story Jeff the killer, slender man and meany more Run away Chapter 1: Run Away   Jeff's pov I was runing and runing untill I stoped in front of a big house in the middle of the woods. The lights where on I was coved in blude, with a smile carved into my cheaks my eyeleds bunt off and my hair as blak as night so long it reached my shoulders, and my skin whiter than snow. I knocked on the door. When the door opend there was a man without a face he was tall with what looked like tinticles comeing from his back, and a tux on. The man didn't say anything he just used bodie langue.  I told the man what had just happend to me, why I looked the way I looked. The man mothion me to come in so I did, not thinking about it.    Time skip Its been about two weeks since I came to this place. I really don't know the day and or time to be honest. I finly found out the name of that tall man. Other people that liver here and I all call him slnder, short for slenderman. Slender is like the dad in our weird little family. The other people in the house is eyeless Jack, Ben Drownd, Sally, and smilie.  Even one acts like a family My favorite out of all of them is eyeless Jack. Jack and I are like brothers well not really where more like best bro's instead of brothers. Sometimes I do miss my brother Lui and my mom and my dad I miss them all. Jack kinda reminds me of Lui maybe that why I like Jack more than anyone else.  Now thinking about it that's probably the only reason why I like jack the most. Well I'm going to stop talking about my brother because if I don't I'll cry since I was the one that killed him. Its been about 4 weeks now since I've lived here. I've started to kill for fun now because it feels the empty voied in my stomach. I loved the taste of the blood on my knife after I killed someone like my fangirls and stuff.      Who is She? Chapter 2: Who is She?   One night when I was out hunting the bitches that fangirl over me, I saw someone on the top of a building. When I saw her she wearing a black hoodie that covers her face she was in all balck. When she saw me and saw I was looking at her she started to run. She was jumping building to building without stoping. I chaced after her but couldn,t keep up. I passed out the last thing I saw was her walking up to me. When I woke up I was in my room in the mansion. When I got up out of bed I went downstairs and the girl was ther still in all black. She was talking to eyeless Jack I walked over to her and sat down. She asked me if I was okay I just said ya than asked what her name was. She said her name was Kaylyn. I than asked if she wanted to take down her hood and she did. When she did she had hazel red eyes that sparkled in the light. She had a dark sandy hair color that went down to her shoulders even a little past, She smiled at me and thats when slender walked in she had a scared look on her face. Slender walked over to her he than picked her up by her hoodie. He was saying something but no one knew she answerd him back though. She was screaming okay I'm sorry I didn't mean to come here. I was now wondering who she was to him and how did she know what he was saying because no one ever did. When slender put her down I asked her who she was to him and how did she understand him? She said that she couldn't say but I wanted to know who the hell was she. She was given a room. She was living with us and everyone tried to see her naked or in the shower things like that but slender man was always blocking the way. He was like some type of sickey gard keeping us away from her. First Time   Chapter 3: First Time   Slender man noticed I wasn't trying to be a perv to Kaylyn like all the other guys. He got Kaylyn and me in a room with him. In the room he was talking and Kaylyn was translateing for him. He told us that we can go hunting together since he trusted me he also told me to protect her and keep her safe at all cost. So we went hunting she had her black hood on and she kept her face hiden. The weapon she had was a knife that shined in the light. When we went she showed me how to run and jump building to building. That night we wated until midnight came around so we sat on the top of a building until than. On the building she put her head on my shoulder with her eyes closed. When she was westing her head the wind blow her hood off. It didn't seem to bother her but I remeber what slender man said so I put her hood back and I held it there.    Misnight It was now midnight and I didn't want to wake her up because I was loving this. She than woke up on her own and said what time is it I told her. When I told her she stud up I didn't there was a guy on the other side of the street. She jumped off the building and like lightning she dashed over and slit the man's throat. Se was fast so fast you couldn't see her kill people. Before we went back to the mansion we talked some. I asked once again who was she to slender man. When she told me she said not to tell anyone else ever! you could tell she ment it by the look in her eyes. I promised I wouldn't and she told me that she was his daughter and that slender never wanted her to leave her home or ever meet us. I than wonder did slender man know what she was capable of or what? I didn't say anything to the others. When everyone was asleep I was wide awake I heard foot steps on the floor that stoped right at my door. When my door open Kaylyn peaked in and asked if I was still awake I cleary said yes since I was. She walked into my room and shut the door behind her. She told me to move over to witch I did and she got into bed with me. I couldn't believe what was happening I think I was blushing. She put her arm around my torso and we taled for what seemed like hours before she feel asleep. I didn't want to make slender mad if he saw us, but I also didn't want her to feel like I didn't like her. I chose to put my arm around her and I feel right alseep.   Morning I woke up to everyone in my room staring at us. Thats when slender walked in he didn't seem mad. The only thing he did was pick her up into his arms and walked out. When he was gone I got up and everyone was asking me how did I get her in bed with me. I told them to fuck off and go away thats when Slender walked in with Kaylyn. She ran up to me and huged me giving me a kiss on the check I asked whats going on. She told everyone that she was going to live her for now on and never go back home. That this was her new home everyone was confused not knowing the secret that she told me last night plus they all thought that she already lived here. Everyone just went on with there normal lifes and didn't care what so ever. She wanted to see me kill someone since I saw her last night and didn't kill. I took her to my old home because kids would come in looking becasue the cars in the driveway haven't left and no one came in or out. When we walked in there was 3 boys she hid esaily she was like some type of ninja. The boys didn't see her when she pushed one of them and turned on the tv. They went up stairs some how she got up there before them without being seen. she stoed at the top when they saw her she said you better run. They came dashing down the stairs I blocked the exit as she chased them toweds me. They stoped at the site of me I told them to go to sleep and I killed them all. As we lwft she kissed me saying good job. When we got back to the mansion she went to her room I wanted to follow her in but I didn't.  What? Really?   Chapter 4: What? Really?   When she walked out of her room she came and sat by me on the couch she than put my arm around her as she placed her head on my shoulder. Everyone around stared and asked if we were dating I let her answer them. In surprise she said yes I asked really?! in shock. She replied with ya why do you think I keep kissing you and cuddling you? I told her that would make since now. It made me kinda happy that she said yes because it ment she loved me to. Also I didn't have to deal with being embarresed trying to ask her out.  That night we went out hunting when we did she ran into someone. I yelled at them saying watch were your going and I helped her up. When she got up she said a name and killed the guy. I asked her who that was she just said it was no one that deserved to die. Along with that she said I should have done that a long time ago and she smirked.    Time skip We walked into the door as we did everyone looked at us. Thats when Ben asked how our date went. Kaylyn said it was fine until I ran into my ex. I than yelled  Oh so thats who he was!  She than said she was going to go hope in the shower. I staed downstairs as the door closed behinde her everyone stoped doing what they were doing and ran up there. I stoped them because she was mine and I wasn't going to let them get to her espescially when shes necked. They all went back downstais as they said your no fun Jeff. I than replied with well shes my girlfriend and I won't let you guys see her necked. I also told slender I would protect her and keep her safe no matter what even from you guys. We started to talk until she walked out she was dressed and her hair was driping wet. When she walked down the stairs she was drying her hair I pated the spot next to me and told her to sit there. When she sat down she started to brush her hair I took the brush from her and asked if I could do it and she said yes. I started to brush it softly so I wouldn't hurt her and she said it felt nice when I finished she said Thanks. She than got up to put her hair brush back were it went she came back to the spot next to me and started to cuddle. Slender walked in picked us up and took us to another room he stated to talk. When he did Kaylyn was telling me what he was saying. He was telling me that I was like a soon to him, and if anyone married Kaylyn he would want it to be me. He than said but if you dare hurt my little girl so god help me I will kill you. We all went back to what we were doing. Kaylyn and I went up to my room and watced the only movie I had witch was  Texas Chainsaw Massacre . She feel asleep in my arms when the movie was playing I stayed up to finish watching it. When it went off she woke up I told her to go back to bed as I got the movie out and turned off the tv. I didn't kill her I got back in bed with her but I took off my shirt just for her.  The dream Chapter 5: The Dream    As I feeel asleep with her in my arms I started to dream. Its been a long time since I actullay had a good dream. Ever since I killed my parents and brother I would always have nightmares of that night. For once it was different tonight I had a good dream. At least thats what I thought it was.    Morning When I woke up I was crying. Kaylyn asked me what was wrong. I told her what had happen in my "dream". When I told her that in my "dream" I killed her she huged me tightly. She said that would never happen and that would explain my dream. I asked her what happen in her dream she said the same thing but in her point of view. I than held her tightly to were she couldn't move. I wispered in her ear I loved her and she said it back. I kissed her for the first time she kissed me back and in shock her lips were as sweet as cotton candy. At this point I realized she was the best thing to ever happen to me. That night we went out to hunt when we shouldn't have. When we were hunting one guy had a gun. Kaylyn was in the way of the gun shot so I jumped in the way. I couldn't let her die when the shot hit me I fell to the ground. I told Kaylyn to run but she didn't she than ran behind the man and broke his neck. She picked me up and draged me to an alie way. She told me she would go get help and ran off. When she came back I bled out.                                                                         TO BE CONTINUED Publication Date: August 25th 2015 https://www.bookrix.com/-ph35bf26d19ce45
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-ginger-starr-smiley/
Ginger Starr Smiley Monday September 17, 2012 Group Chat Mei Lin,Aria,Ginger Mei Lin- hey guys! I got an ipod for my birthday! Aria- omg that's awesome! happy birthday! when is ur party? Mei Lin- um i dont no yet... by the way, wat does omg mean? Ginger- oh my gosh Mei Lin- wat?! Aria- *facepalm* omg= oh my gosh Mei Lin- Ohhhh! Ginger- haha happy birthday linny! Mei Lin- thaanks... so wats up? Ginger- seat teseting for orchestra tomorrow... so nervous! Aria- yea... hasnt liza been rlly nice to u this year? Ginger- yup, its weird but she'll probably hate me tommorow. she wud KILL for first chair! Mei Lin- talk about moody Ginger- ehh watevs, im just glad ive been in the top 3 seats for 3 years... i mean Liza and Grayson have both been taking lessons since they were 6! Aria- u r an amazing violinist so u will do great! Mei Lin- that reminds me; i have gymnastics tommorow and my mom is off from work so she will be watching me AND I HAVNT PRFECTED MY BACKFLIP!!! Ginger- ugh that sucks :( Aria- u will rock! calm down! Mei Lin- srry i pressed the caps locks Ginger- lol its ok. well i gtg to modern class.. c u guys later :) Aria- biiii Mei Lin- hey Aria wat does lol and gtg mean? Aria- remind me to tell u tommorow in school all of the texting "lingo" ok? i have to go eat dinner Mei Lin- o ok! c ya Publication Date: September 23rd 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-gingerstarr
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-a-j-rouse-best-friends-for-never/
a.j rouse Best friends for never self destruction OH SHIT chanell: ELANA? where were you today .. we couldnt find you anywhere. and brooke and hallie and i tried calling your phone but you didnt answer? me: sorry i got my phone taken away brooke: psh thats a lie.. you never get your phone taken away .. you play by all the rules me: do not!! hallie : yes you do !! chanell: well ima go ill see you guys at school mkay ? hallie: im gonna go too i have tumbling classes at 6:00 me: aww... well bye brooke: im out ... peace!! young grass hoppers!! :)) me: EVERY ONE WAIITT!!!! WHOS GOING TO POST ON SIMPLELIFE ??? -__- .. Thank you for using ChatNet. It appears to be that everyone is offline would you like to log off or leave a message ? me: really? Thankyou your message will be sent shortly. BlIIINGGGG. I threw my pillow across my head. What the hell was that noise .I picked up the alarm clock and staired into it as if I could see it . It was still dark in my room. I climbed into my bed and went back to sleep . Then I started to dream . Dreaming for me was like living in a world that I could actually call my own . It had everything I wanted it to have. Dad was still here, Mom went back to working at H Jane designer company, and as for me , I was the top journalist in the world. Then of course there was Trent Mathews . High class blue eyed Varsity team football player for the Michigan High Mustangs. He was mine and not Cassidy Tanner's. Then it started raining in my dream . It was odd because I wasn't trying to dream about rain I was trying to dream about Trent .I started to wake up. It was onex drooling on my face. I glanced over to my purple clock. It was hard for me not to have my phone . I had it taken away because I lied about going to my grandparents house. Instead I went to this cool icecream place called Jenova. The icecream there was bomb! Wait a minute. I glanced at the clock again it was 7:02. The bus normally got to Oakstone at 7:15. There was no way in hell that i would make it . I rolled out of my bed as fast as I could . I did every thing that i need to do and ran outside of my house and down the street. I seen the big corn on the cob. which for me was what i called the bus. I quickly got on. Every one had started to laugh. I looked around to see if anything was different with anybody elses face. Then i checked there clothes. Cassidy had her baby blonde hair propped up in a high ponty tail. Her make up was perfectly shaded for her green eyes. Her clothes were tight but very stylish . She seem to have dressed normally. As for trent the same. Chanller had a different pairof sneakers on. In fact he almost had new pair of shoes every week. He was nominated "Most Swag" for our school year book. Then I checked my self . Everything was fine . My hair was still dirty blonde. My eyes were still brown . My boobs were still small. My clothes were still 7th grade like. Everything was normal . It wasn't me that every one was laughing at. Or was it. I tried hiding out so no one would say anything to me. I went to the very back off the bus and quickly sat down." Some one missed the toilet ". Every one started laughing . I thought to myself . Toilet? I didn't go to the bathroom since 10:00 at night . Thank god it wasnt me they were talking about . Missing the toilet is something that I do not fail at . Sounds Humiliating. I checked my backpack to see if my mom had put my phone back in there. Usually she calls me to see if I got on the bus. I never get my phone taken away , but i know for a fact that my mom wouldnt let me go anywhere with out it . Since im her only child, she's very over protective over me. Yup. It was there with a text message from her. Have a good day at school angel. and its laundry tues-night so I will be washing your clothes. empty the pockets of your jeans and wish me luck because that large pudding stain on your pants might be hard to wash .... it might have to go in the wash a few times. xoxo -mom. Now i want some pudding. Chocolate was my favorite. I logged on to ChatNet. ChatNet me: anyone online ? chanell: HEEY:)) OMGE AND GUESS WHAT me: what?? :D hallie: THERES A GIRL ON YOUR BUS THAT CRAPPED HER PANTS LMFAO! chanell: thanx hallie ...-_- hallie: your welcome me: :OOOOO OH SHIT!!! chanell: lol ikr ... she shitted herself me: GUYS I G2G !!!!! I need to go home now! chanell: what why ? whats wrong .. hallie: elana...how are you gonna get back home your already on the bus .. arent you ? I was crap girl! It all made since. Pudding stain on pants. How could this happen? I simply grabbed the pants out of my closet! What is Trent going to say . Every one at the whole school will see me. There goes my life .Right down the toilet . Or should I say right down my pants. At that point I totally lost it. I would be Known as "Shit girl " For the rest of my life. We finally arrived at school. I pretended I lost my phone to make sure I was indeed the last person to get off the bus so that no one would see me . After everyone got off the bus I seen hallie and chanell get on the bus . "Hey there you are, why are you the last one getting off the bus ? and did you see shit girl yet"? chanell said . " Nope I missed her .. oh wait no I didnt ." I said with sarcasim. " No Way you seen her !! Did she smell "? hallie said. " She smelled like the best thing in the world. Chocolate Pudding.". "Chocolate pudding ? you love cho- Oh no your shit girl"? I looked up at chanell and hallie in shame. I didnt know I had on these pants. I felt uncomfortable even telling them. So I nodded my head. Hallie looked down at me. "I have a Skirt ! come on get up me and chanell will cover you from behind and we'll rush to the bathroom". "ok" i said .I was happy to hear that i wouldnt be known as shit girl . Then again I thought to myself . I hadn't shaved my legs in centuries. I might as well just be called " The hair " . It was much better than being called the " shit girl " anyway. I started to panick. We made it to the bath room in time but hallie had to go to her locker to get her skirt. Chanell went to the restroom . As I staired at myself in the bath room mirror I noticed behind me came the A-sqaud . Cassidy, Bailey, and Emily. "Go ahead guys" . I staired in the mirror and suddenly The A-squad pulls out there cell phones and take pictures of my pudding stain. Hallie rushed in with the skirt. "Hey sorry im late I got-". she paused " You guys are such bitches . What did she ever do to you that mad you want to do anything to make her feel like she nothing. You Know what Ill find you in my toilet you peace of shits! ".hallie said in her filipino bitch mode. Finally chanell walks out of the stall and comes by the mirror to wash her hands. She keeps her head down because she has nothing to say . which was really odd. " Why dont you tell your firend about the toilet sometime hallie". "Chanell.. are you still coming over on saturday"? WHAT! Chanell is going with the A-sqaud on saturday . Is she brain washed our something. Besides thats our pizza night she wouldnt miss it for the A-squad would she ?." Yeah . are you "? I said with no hesitation . I knew she was going to Go with us. Why would the A-squad even invite her. They never liked us before.She answered yes in a soft and quiet tone . I was applaude. Hallie didnt even seem to say much and hallie ALWAYS has something to say. I felt like the no brainer on this one . They were totally going behind my back and the worst part about it was they were going with the A-squad. The most Popular girls in Michigan High. I snatched the skirt out of hallie's hand and ran into the stall to change. I stayed in there for a long amount of cause i had to try to pick my baby blone but noticable leg hair. This was truely the most humiliating day of my life. ChatNet Publication Date: January 22nd 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-amari51
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-rashel-jordan-bad-blood-2/
Rashel Jordan Bad Blood 2 The Univited This is for my friend, Adriana Allen, aka Sorry Sorry. Point By Murder It has been only four days since we moved to Paradise, Ohio. So far, there hasn't been anymore cryptic or almost life taking letters from Stalker Boy. Right now, I was waiting for Mrs. Milliem, my geometry teacher, to call my name for attendance "Alex Cowans." she said in her bland voice. "Here." a boy said in the front. "Bernard Dello." "Here." a boy said somewhere behind me. I zoned out until I heard my name. "Corriander Sterling." she sighed. "Here." my voice was languid. Mrs. M blinked. I stopped paying attention. Raven figured out a way to be in all my classes(go figure). We had a test today and of course, as usual, I aced it. Once class was of over, Raven ran up to me. "Goddess, I think I failed that test." Raven said. I gave her the 'I told you so' look. "That's what you get when you play with peoples' minds instead of studying." I pointed out. "Yeah, but you have to admit, it's very entertaining."Raven purred. "Okay, but when I graduate and you don't, you can't blame me." I said, putting my books in my locker like Raven was. "Point." she sighed. I smiled. "Four to zip." I said. We were keeping score. "Well, you are smarter than me." she muttered. "Hurtful!" I said. I can't stand being called smart. It's like saying I'm ...geeky. "Yeah, but true." she said in singsong voice. I sighed, frustrated at her. "Point...by truth." I said. "4 to 1." she reminded me. "Yeah,yeah."I said walking into the cafeteria. Neither Raven or I felt comfortable yet. We got our lunch and made our way to the table we called ours. We sat down. Nathan and Elijah sat down a couple minutes later. Nathan had a goofy smile on his face, Elijah didn't look as pleased. "What are you cheesing about?" Raven said. "A girl asked me out." he said. "A girl? Are you sure it wasn't a gay dyke?" Raven snorted. "Point by joke." Elijah and I said in unison. Nathan mumbled something unintelligible. "But look at who asked him out." Elijah pointed his finger. I looked and growled lightly. The girl I was looking at was an Adder. Now Adders,they're all female(in some states the ratio is unbalanced between women and men). They seduce men to breed. They were called Adders because they could only do one spell: The glamour spell. They used it to add desire or add immortal features to their almost human bodies. And, they were a witches' worst enemy. Nobody knows why...they just are. I narrowed my eyes at her. She winced slightly in pain and looked around. I turned away quickly. She continued what she was doing a minute later. I snickered. Elijah laughed lightly. That was another thing about Adders: They don't know a witch when they see one. "What about the girl?" Raven asked. "She's an Adder." I said. Nathan and Raven looked confused. "You're a Hunter and you haven't even heard of an Adder?" I was shocked. Nathan looked away, embarrassed. "What the goddess is an Adder?!" Raven asked, shaking her hands in the air. "An Adder is a female human monster, a.k.a the worst enemy of a witch. And humans."Elijah explained. They still didn't get it. "What? Female human monster?" Nathan said. "A female monster in human form. They seduce human men so they can have more babies. Monster babies." I said. "Oh. That's so not cool." Raven said. "They use the only spell they can do: glamour spell. They use it to hide their looks when they're pregnant." Elijah said. "But look at her! She's harmless!" Nathan objected. "She only looks harmless because she's only about a year old." I took a bite of my salad. They all looked at me. "In human years!" I added quickly. "It doesn't look like it." Raven muttered. "But in Adder years, she's probably old enough to be your great-great-great-great-great-grandmother." I pointed my fork at Nathan. "Dude, that is sick! You might be dating a baby and an old hag at the same time." Raven snorted. "Hey I wonder if her double p( Just so you know this means Private Part) is all old and wrinkly-" Raven was ranting. Elijah held one hand up. "Stop. You're making me lose my appetite." he stared, unhappily, into his spaghetti. "Sorry." Raven said lightly. "Will two cut it out. I'm trying to focus." I snapped. "On what?" Nathan actually looked interested in what I had to say. "The Adder?" he suggested. "No, the boy next to her. Yes the Adder!" I looked at Nathan. I looked back at her. Almost as if she was forced, but wanted to, she walked slowly towards our table. Raven looked at me in surprise. I nodded. "Hi, I'm Rose." the girl said shyly. "I'm Elijah." "I'm Raven." "And that's Corrie." Nathan said. The girl's eyes flashed silver, but only for a second. But that time was enough. Elijah saw it, too. He cleared his throat. "Nathan tells me you guys are his closest friends. I had an idea, but only if you want to, you all could sit at my table with my friends and I?" Rose said. Man, this girl could act! "Actually, I'm done eating. Plus I don't feel so good. You guys can go ahead if you want to, though." I said. Rose's smile faltered a bit. Raven eyed me, suspiciously. "Are you well enough to drive?" Elijah asked. "Yes." I said. I waved to them. Once I got home, I walked upstairs to our library. I ran my fingers across the covers until I came upon a book I needed, then kept going. Soon both my arms were full. It felt like I had been reading for minutes, but could tell it had been hours. Through my closed bedroom door, I heard Raven's combat boots stomping around downstairs. I carefully put the books under a loose wood board which was underneath a black rug. "Corriander Sterling,get your goddess given culo down here!" Raven shouted. Jeesh, she didn't have to curse in Italian. I walked out of my room and waited at the top of the old oak stairs. "What?" I said. "Explain to us why you ran out on us in a time of need?" she said as she slowly walked up the stairs. Elijah and Nathan just walked through the door. They both turned away, not wanting to get involved. Wimps. "Come on." I hissed to Raven. I pulled her into my room. "So, are you going to answer my question?" Raven crossed her arms over her chest and raised one blond brow. "I have to kill her." I said. Short and clean. "Kill who?" "Her. Rose. She has to die." it wasn't like I kill on a daily basis,but would you feel sorry for killing someone who was trying to sleep with your ex-boyfriend? "You can't be serious!" Raven yelled. I hissed at her to be quiet. "I am serious and you're going to help me."I said. Raven's eyes bulged. "What?! You can't go around asking people to help you kill someone!" Raven said more quietly. "Well, you aren't just some person, are you? No, you're my cousin, you know me and I know you." I said. Raven didn't look so convinced. "Please? Pretty please with warm AB positive on top?" I saw the look of hunger cross Raven's eyes. "Fine!" she said. "Point by blood!" I said. Raven rolled her eyes. "Oh, whatever! Just give me the blood!" Raven sighed. I gave her the bag. When I gave it to her, she poked a hole in it and she started to slurp it down. I saw that a little drop of blood on my finger. I looked at it. Curiosity took over and soon my finger was in my mouth. Raven didn't notice. Suddenly I felt a pain in my finger. I pulled it out of my mouth. "Ow!" I said. I cursed. "What's wrong-Oh. My. Goddess!" Raven said. "What?" did I have blood on my face? "Go look in the mirror." was all she said. I went into my bathroom. I let out a yelp of surprise. I poked my tongue at the canines in my mouth. I had fangs. "Holy crap!" I said. I hissed, only this time it was like a cat hissing. Like a real hiss. "Cool." I muttered. I looked at my finger. It had two small wounds. They were fading quickly, though. "At last, my little cousin has grown up." Raven said in the doorway. I snorted. "You're only a few minutes older, so don't get cocky." I said. I gently pushed my finger on them and they retracted back to a normal size. I smiled slightly. I, Corriander Sterling, witch/vampire, had fangs. "Anyway, so you'll help me?" I said, turning my attention to where the conversation had left off. "Yeah!" "Jeesh, I never knew you were enthusiastic about killing people." I muttered. "No, not about that. I'm happy because now I can tell you the vampire secrets that only vampires can here." Raven said. "Oh. Shall we go and try it out?" I said. Raven looked at me, mischievously. "La duh! Of course!" We went downstairs to the living room, where the boys were. We sat down across from each other. "Meeting! Corrie and I have something to say. It's fangtastic!" Raven said. Both boys looked at us. Raven started speaking in Old Vampiric. I tried to understand it,but I couldn't. "Relax and let your mind take over." Hellewise said in my head. I sighed and relaxed. "Can you understand me now?" Raven said. I opened my eyes and nodded. We looked at the two boys, who were looking as confused as I was. We smiled. "So, it works. Now what?" I asked. Raven shrugged. "Do you think Nathan is cute?" Raven asked suddenly. I widened my eyes, but answered. "Yes, he's cute. I don't date ugly boys. Why, Raven, do you have a little crush on our meklynal devyl?" I said in a Russian accent. Raven giggled. I always did accents the best. "No. Maybe.I don't know! I think I do, but I don't want to make things weird and akward between us." Raven said. I smiled, knowingly. I glanced at the boys. They were looking at us like we were crazy. I giggled. "We must continue this later, when there aren't eager ears waiting." I said to Raven. She nodded. "Did you hear or understand anything we just said?" Raven said, switching back to English. "We tried, but hopelessly failed." Elijah said. Raven smiled, triumphantly. That night, Raven and I continued our earlier conversation. I showed the books to her. I finally went to sleep, but didn't dream a regular dream. The Dream: The dream started out silently. I was in an open field, the wind blowing across my bare shoulders. I looked around and found no one else there but the darkness in between the trees. I kept wondering if Ian Somerhalder or Justin Timberlake was going to pop out from behind the trees. But, as I kept walking, I realized I was all alone. Well, I thought that until something moved in my peripheral vision. I noticed a human-like shadow move in the darkness. I started to hum some Russian lullaby. I danced the waltz with my eyes closed. When I stopped and opened my eyes, I had to cover my mouth from letting out a huge scream. "Michael." I whispered. His blue eyes looked directly into mine. He smiled. "Hello, my love." he said, wiping a piece of my hair to go behind my ear. His finger brushed my ear. I shivered. I took this time to look him over. He had on regular blue jeans, but they hung off low on his waist. He had massive, like I mean HUGE, black wings, and guess what? He didn't have a shirt on! "I'm not your love. I don't know you,and you don't know me. So go find someone else to stalk." I sneered. He chuckled, eerily. I shuddered at the sound. "Whatever I want,I get." he said simply. I smiled, but to him, it probably looked like a snarl. "I'm just as stubborn as you are, maybe even more. But guess what? I get what I want. Just like you. But I don't stalk the person in their dreams!" I shouted at him. Michael frowned, but it went away quickly. "You're right. Maybe I should walk into your room and seduce you into to agreeing that you are mine." he said. I was shocked. I snorted. "Let's get this straight. I'm am not a piece of property. I do not belong to you. My love goes to my family, friends, and Hellewise." I said, confidently. At the mention of Hellewise he winced but tried to cover it up. "Now remember this. If you go after my family or friends, it'll be me you have to worry about, not the Archangels." I warned. I was glad my voice sounded brave because I was shaking with fear inside. Threats of A Half Vamp I opened my eyes to see Elijah's face over mine. "What the hell?" I hissed. He sighed, relieved. "Why are you in my room?"I asked. "Goddess, I thought you were in danger!" Elijah sank down to the side of my bed. I sat up and noticed that I was in my bra and boy shorts. "Where are my clothes?" I said, clutching the blanket to me. Elijah looked up at me in surprise. "You didn't have any on when I came in." Elijah looked down in embarrassment. His cheeks were a reddish color as he blushed. "But I had clothes on when I went to bed." I stated. I looked around my room. I saw a shirt on my window sill and recognized it as my pj's. I got up. Elijah closed his eyes. "Jeesh, men are such babies." I put on the over sized shirt. I noticed something else that was by the window. I saw a black feather. From Michael. He was in my room. That sneaky little- "Hey! Hey, just calm down, Corrie." Elijah said, hugging me. My arms were bright red. "You never answered my question. Why did you come in my room?" I grabbed two fist fulls of his shirt and pushed him against the wall. He had put his arms up in surrender. "I don't know! I just felt some of your emotions, you know. At first, you were scared, then you were feeling threatened, and then I felt your anger." Elijah shrugged his shoulders miserably. "Jeesh, I feel like my privacy is invaded." I muttered. "Well, it's not my fault I can sense you all the way to down the tips of your hair." he ruffled his bedhead hair. I raised one of my black brows, delicately. "You can sense everyone like that?" I asked. "No, just you." he sighed. "So you're a Senser and I'm a Siren." I ran my hand through my hair. I let Elijah go and sat on my bed. "You're a Siren?" Elijah sat next to me. "Yes." I said. "Aren't Sirens like Charmers?" he asked. I gasped. "No. There is a big difference between a Siren and a Charmer." "What's the difference between a Siren and a Charmer?" Elijah snorted. I punched him in the stomach and ran quietly, but fast, down the stairs(one of the benifits of having vampire blood in me, I guess). When I reached the bottom, I fell. I couldn't move. Elijah was making his way down the stairs slowly, a smile on his face. He used the paralyze spell on me, as I knew he would. "Now, you can't move until I let you." Elijah chuckled, leaning over me. I smiled sweetly. "Eli, I can't move! Please let me move." I whined. I started getting back the feelings in my legs. As soon as I did, I clipped him. "That's the Charmer." He fell hard, and screamed out in pain. It caused a lot of noise. Raven and Nathan ran downstairs. They saw us on the floor. "What did you do to her, Elijah?!" Nathan screamed. "Eli, you better hope I don't kill you!" Raven said. "And that's the Siren." I said. Elijah coughed and nodded. "Calm down. I was teaching him what the difference between a Charmer and a Siren is." I said getting up and helping Elijah up, too. "Thanks." Elijah said. "You charmed me. That's why you were able to knock off the spell. But I still don't get the difference." Elijah sighed. "Why?" Nathan asked. Elijah shot me a look that said to keep quiet. "Because he asked." I sighed. Raven eyed me. Nathan was shooting blades at Elijah. "Okay, everyone back up stairs." I started herding everyone upstairs. I was about to open my door when a tan arm snaked around my waist and pulled me backwards. I was pushed against a wall. "Corrie, what was the real reason he asked that question?" Nathan said in my ear. His breath tickled my neck. "I already told you." I said through clenched teeth. "That was a lie. Tell me the truth." his arm was still around my waist. He began to squeeze. "Go to hell." I said, out of breath. "You go first." he hissed. I felt my pupils dilate and my gums tingled. "Get off of me or I swear on every cell in my body, I will kill you." I said in a sickly sweet voice. I gave him a toothy smile. He gasped. Yes, he saw my fangs. He let go and ran to his room. I sighed and went back to bed. Ah, hell, more problems for me in the morning. I fell back into a dreamless slumber. Try To Kill Me? I woke up. Why did I feel trapped? Why did I feel paranoid? As I looked up I gasped. A large wooden stake hung over me. The hand that was holding it belonged to Nathan. I could hear boots walking around upstairs. Upstairs? I looked around and realized where I was. In the basement. I was about to scream, but he covered my mouth. "Corriander? Corrie?!" I heard Raven's muffled voice upstairs, looking for me. Once he was sure I wasn't going to scream, he removed his hand. I closed my eyes and summoned all my energy. Elijah!I'm in the basement!Help,this idiot is trying to stake me! I sent from my mind, hoping that Elijah or Raven would hear it. I heard two sets of feet make their way into the basement. Before either of them had a chance to do anything, Nathan staked me. I screamed out in pain. I'm going to die, this is it. I thought I was going to die. It turns out, he staked me in my shoulder. He actually dislocated my arm. "Corrie!" it was Violet. I hadn't seen her all day. She rushed over to me, carefully but fast, and took the stake out. I gasped in pain. She and Raven were over me, going over which spells would heal my wound. I already knew it would take some time for it to be okay. Then, there was a sickening crack. We hadn't noticed Elijah heading for Nathan. "Elijah! Stop!" Raven and Violet were shouting at him. "Elijah Arlin." I whispered it, but immediately, Elijah stopped and walked towards me. He knelt on one knee and bowed his head in shame. "I command you to stop. And go upstairs and calm down." I said each word with authority. "Yes, Corrie." he got up and left. I sighed and layed back down. My head was pounding and I could hear the blooding running through my ears. The edges of my vision turned fuzzy. "Corrie, how do feel?" Raven asked worriedly, was standing right next to me, but she sounded far away. "Light and sleepy." I sighed. "No you don't! You don't feel sleepy, Corrie!" Violet threw herself on me.Her body shook and heaved with sobs. Raven put a hand on her back and tried to keep her calm. "We have to let sleep so we can do the spell on her or she'll die from blood-loss." she said to my sister. Now I saw gray dots everywhere. As my eyes started to get heavy I realized that if I went to sleep I might see Michael again. "I don't want to go to sleep! Don't let me go to sleep, please!" I thought I yelled it, but it came out as a whisper. I noticed I was crying. When Violet saw my tears, she looked to Raven. "I'm sorry. We have to let you to sleep." Violet said. She kissed my forehead. I shook my head, slowly. My eyes betrayed me by closing. "No." was the last thing I said before I lost myself in a deep slumber. Kiss Me, Warrior At least I wasn't in a field with Michael. When I looked around, I wasn't so sure that where I was was much better. I was in an arena that was filled with people. I was wearing a sleeveless leather shirt that stopped an inch above my navel, a leather skirt(if I bent over I'm pretty sure my backside would have been exposed.)that stopped five inches above my knees, my feet were in leather sandals. I felt my thick hair in a ponytail on my head, I had a Greek diadem on my head. One of my hands held a metal shield, the other held a silver sword with markings engraved in it. I had a blood red sash tied around my waist. The gate on the other side of the arena opened and the crowd went wild. Out of the shadows, my opponent walked out. It was Michael, of course. He was decked out in the same thing I had on, except his shirt had sleeves and his pants were more like shorts. "Let the fight begin!" someone yelled. I stepped closer to the middle of the arena, the sun settled on my pale skin. At first, Michael was shocked at seeing me here, but then he let out a seductive smile. We circled each other,while Michael held his smile, I held a blank expression on my face. "Well, what do we have here? It seems you can not stay away from me, love." he said as he dealt the first blow. I dodged easily. "Actually, I think you're the one stalking me, and don't call me love. Okay, love?" I smiled at him. He became dazed and I made my move. As soon as I stopped smiling he blocked my attack at the last minute. "Ah, you have discovered some of your powers, I see." he said as he swung his sword low, trying to clip me. I jumped and aimed for his arm. His shield blocked it and he swung at my face. I ducked and returned to a standing position. We returned to walking around each other. I searched for his weak spot. There, his arm. He held his shield the wrong way. His arm was his sore spot. I pretended that my wrist that was holding the sword was hurt, wanting him to go for the kill so I could make my move. "You see, it's my wrist. I won't be able to defend myself if you attack me." I said in my head. I knew he couldn't hear me . I saw him register the weakness in my wrist. He pulled his sword straight up and went for it. I stepped back at the last moment and his sword whistled past my nose, missing it by an inch. I raised the hilt of my sword and hit his shoulder. He hissed in pain. I noticed he was trying to get my sash. So, I cut his off, but to my disappointment, we had did it at the same time. "Tie!" the man said. A short man came and told us to clear the arena. We did, and Michael and I went our separate ways, or so I thought. I was on the inside of the arena,looking for a way out. I saw a gate that led outside. I was looking for a handle when a hand pulled a sword to my neck. I was trapped against someone's body. "Well, if this doesn't change things around, love." Michael chuckled. "What the hell do you want, Michael?" I said through clenched teeth. "You." he murmured in my ear, his cold breath made my skin tingle. "No, I mean why are you where." I tried to pull away, but his other arm was coiling around my waist, entrapping my hands and my body to him. "We're here because I want to make a deal with you." "And what would that be?"I snorted, imagining what he could possibly say. "If you kiss me, I'll keep my distance." I felt his lips close to my neck. "And if I don't?" I raised one eye brow. "Then, I will hurt the ones you love." he said simply, his lips still on my neck. He made me want to punch him in the face, to hurt him. I started to feel a pain in my shoulder, which meant I was about to awaken. I had a plan. I turned around to face him, rubbing parts of my body on him purposely. He looked at me with lust filled eyes. I put my mouth next to his ear. "You promise you'll keep your distance?" my voice was fading, just a couple more seconds. "Yes!" he growled. Wow, he really wanted that kiss. I put my lips a couple centimeters from his, our breath mingled. Once he tried to put his lips on mine, I woke up. Black Feather I opened my eyes slowly. I blinked a couple times and my vision was back. I looked around. I was in my room. Elijah was next to me, his arm draped over my waist(seriously, what is up with people and my waist?). I poked his chest and he stirred. "Elijah." I whispered in a singsong voice. He opened his eyes and looked at me. "Thank god, you're awake!" he hugged me close to him. "Why are you in my room? And why are you in my bed?" I asked, but I didn't mind it that much. "You were having a bad dream again. No one was in here with you so I came. I held your hand and you calmed down. But you started to get restless again so I laid next to you." he said. "Wow." I muttered.“And now you will tell me why you're having bad dreams and what is making you uncomfortable in them." he stated. I rubbed my forehead. "I'm not having bad dreams, they're more like visits. The reason they're uncomfortable is because of Michael." Why did I always have to explain something? "Why is he in your visits?" "Elijah asked, tightening his grip on my waist protectively. "Don't worry he didn't try anything...sort of. But, I think I might have made him very angry." I was playing with the hem of Elijah's shirt, I couldn't face his eyes. "Why would he be angry?" Elijah raised one brow at me. “Because I promised him a kiss and he almost got it, but I woke up." I said in an embarrassed rush.His body tensed and an enraged growl was working its way up. "Why would you promise him a kiss?"he seethed."He promised to stay away if I kissed him!If I didn't,he would of went after the people who are closest to me."I put my face in his chest so I wouldn't have to him.He was angry,but it wasn't directed at me.He was angry at Michael. Text: Don't copy All rights reserved. Publication Date: November 12th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-raerae22
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-clarissa-romero-all/
CLARISSA ROMERO ALL Travis “SEC. 1 TRAVIS” FIRST TIMES WITH TRAVIS FIRST TIME WE KISSED- WAS AFTER SKOOL WHEN WE WERE JUST STANDING THERE AND HE WAS HOLDING MY HAND AND HAD THE OTHER ON MY CHEEK. WHEN- WAS AFTER SKOOL WHEN WE WERE JUST STANDING THERE AND HE WAS HOLDING MY HAND AND HAD THE OTHER ON MY CHEEK. DATE-MARCH 2,2012 WHEN- AFTER SKOOL MONTH-MARCH DAY-2ND YEAR-2012 FIRST TIME WE HELD HANDS-WAS WHEN WE STAYED AFTER SKOOL AND MY FUCKEN SIS WOULDN'T STOP LAUGHING AND WHEN HE DIDN'T WONT ME TO LEAVE WHEN-AFTER SKOOL WHEN WE STAYED AND MY SIS WOULDN'T STOP LAUGHING DATE- JAN. 26,2012 WHEN- WHEN AFTER SKOOL WHEN WE STAYED AND MY SIS WOULDN'T STOP LAUGHING MONTH- JANUARY DAY- 26TH YEAR- 2012 FIRST TIME I RELUZED I REALLY NEED TRAVIS-WHEN IT FELT LIKE DANIEL WAS IGNORING ME ALL DAY ,AND THE ONLY PERSON I COULD TALK TO WAS TRAVIS AND I REALLY NEEDED TO SEE HIM, AND WHEN I ALMOST LEFT DANIEL BUT BOBBY GOT ME NOT TO. WHEN-WHEN IT FELT LIKE DANIEL WAS IGNORING ME ALL DAY ,AND THE ONLY PERSON I COULD TALK TO WAS TRAVIS AND I REALLY NEEDED TO SEE HIM, AND WHEN I ALMOST LEFT DANIEL BUT BOBBY GOT ME NOT TO. DATE-MARCH WHEN- WHEN IT FELT LIKE DANIEL WAS IGNORING ME ALL DAY ,AND IN LAST HOUR. MONTH- MARCH DAY- 16TH YEAR- 2012 HOW LONG WE DATED=47 DAYS TOGETHER 1 MONTH AND 23 DAYS I mean I want to be with Travis. But I'm with Daniel and I LOVE him. So I'm not gonna break up with him for Travis. I mean I love Bobby (like a brother) but I'm with Daniel and I love him. And TJ I'm never gonna go back out with him. So hit me up if u liked book. Tell me what u thought about it. Thanks for reading my book. Tj “SEC. 2 TJ” TJ HELD MY HAND TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG. TODAY ME AND TJ HELD HANDS FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER.AND HIS HANDS WERE COLD.BUT IT FELT WEIRED HOLDING A GUYS HAND AGAIN.AND HE TOLD ME “HE LOVES ME” LIKE 20 OR 30 TIMES TODAY.BUT I DONT CARE BE CAUSE “I LOVE HIM TO”.AND TODAY I ALMOST SLAPED SELIN BECAUSE RIGHT AWAY WHEN SHE SAW ME AND TJ HOLDING HANDS IN THE HALL.SOON AS I GOT TO PE SHE SAID “CAN I ASK U SOMETHING” AND I SAID “YES”.THEN SHE SAID “R U GOING OUT WITH TJ.”AND IM LIKE “YES” Y ELSE WOULD I BE HOLDING HIS HAND.(I LOVE HIM MORE THEN ANYTHING IN THE WORLD (I THOU;GHT))HE MEANS THE WORLD TO ME.I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR HIM.BUT YESTERDAY I ASKED HIM IF HE WAS CHEATING ON ME AND IF HE WAS TO SCARED TO HOLD MY HAND AND IF HE COULD STOP HUGING OTHER GIRLS THEN ME. AND THIS MORNING HE TAPED ME AND ASKED IF HE COULD TALK TO ME AND I SAID YES.AND HE SAID “IM NOT CHEATING ON U.......AND IM NOT CHICKEN TO HOLD UR HAND......AND I'LL STOP HUGING OTHER GIRLS............ AND YES I DO LOVE U OK.”AND OF CORSE I SAID “K.”AND THEN RIGHT AWAY HE GRABES MY HAND. SO EVERYONE COULD SEE.OH AND HE HUGED ME LIKE 10 OR 20 TIMES ALL DAY. AND WE SAT ARM TO ARM ALL DAY IT WAS NICE.BUT IT WAS FUNNY BECAUSE POSEYS SAID “FUCK U TJ U STOLL MY GIRLFRIEND.”AND OMG I COULDN'T STOP LAUGHING.......OH AND TJ PUT HIS ARM AROUND ME THIS MORNING TO. WHEN WE WERE GOING IN THE BUILDING AND SINCE MY HAIR WAS IN MY FACE HE ASKED ME IF I WAS BLUSHING.AND I SAID “PLEASE DONT START WITH THAT.” OH AND I WORE TJS HAT AFTER SCHOOL.AND HE WASN'T EVEN THERE (HE WENT TO MASA). AND THATS THAT FOR TODAY.HE MEANS THE WORLD TO ME.I LOVE HIM MORE THEN ANYTHING IN THE WORLD. PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS,I WILL 4-EVER LOVE TJ. 4-EVER N EVER NO MATTER WUT.I WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT. AND REMEMBER THAT HE WILL ALWAYS LOVE ME TO NO MATTER WUT. WHOLE DATE: 9/16/11 TIME WRITEN:5:37 PM MONTH:SEPTEMBER DAY:16TH YEAR:2011 AND WE STARTED TO DATE:WENSDAY THE 15TH WE LOVE EACHOTHER MORE THEN ANYTHING IN THE WORLD:) :) :) :) :) I LOVE HIM. HELD HAND AGAIN IT WAS FUNNY OMG.TODAY ME AND TJ HELD HANDS AGAIN.BUT THIS TIME NONE OF US WALKED AWAY SO WE HELD HANDS ALMOST THE WHOLE DAY.IT WAS SO MUCH FUN.I LOVE(ED) HIM SO MUCH.IT WAS FUNNY BECAUSE WE PLAYED TRUTH OR DARE.AND WE DARED BOBBY TO HUG MY SISTER AND HE DID.THEN TJ GOT DARED TO KISS ME AND THEN BOBBY GOT DARED TO KISS MY SISTER TOO.BUT OFCORSE WE DIDNT.BECAUSE I DONT WONT MINE AND TJS FIRST KISS TO BE DURING TRUTH OR DARE.AND TO DAY HE HUGED ME 4 OR 9 TIMES.AND I HUGED HIM BACK .IT WAS 1 OF THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.OH AND DURING TRUTH OR DARE.WELL BEFOR I WAS CLOSE TO SLAPING SHIAN.BECAUSE SHE WAS TALKING CRAP TO TJ.SO CLOSE.BUT TRAVIS WOULDN'T LET ME.I WAS SO ABOUT TO .BUT TJ WOULDN'T LET ME.SO I COULDN'T.BUT STILL WE PLAYED TRUTH OR DARE.AND IM HAPPY JUST BECAUSE TJ ACSHALY WONTED TO PLAY.BUT THEN SO DID I.AND TRUTH OR DARE WAS FUN.AND THATS THAT. WHOLOE DATE:9/20/2011 TIME WRITEN:5:00 MONTH:SEPTEMBER YEAR:2011 DAY:19TH PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS,I WISH HE WOULD JUST KISS ME ALRETY.I REALLY WONT HIM TO TOUGH.I WONT HIM TO MORE THEN ANYTHING IN THE WORLD. STARING PROBLOM OMG TODAY TJ WAS WAITIMG FOR ME IN THE FRONT .AND AS I SAID HE ALWAYS GRABES MY HAND.AND WHEN WE WERE WALKING IN TO THE BILDING LANCE N HIS GIRLFRIEND WERE STARING.AND IM LIKE TAKE A PIC IT'LL LAST LONGER.BUT IF I WOULD OF I WOULDVE HAD TO KICK HER ASS.AND I REALLY DIDNT WONT TO.BUT I LOVE THE FACT THAT HE ALWAYS HOLDS MY HAND NO MATTER WUT.AND TODAY WE WERE PLAYING 20?'S AND HULTS GF CAME OVER THERE AND TOALY ROED IT.BUT THEN MY SISTER AND BOBBY HELD HANDS.AND SHE WAS ALL R U GUYS GOING OUT.AND IM LIKE STATING THE OFES MUCH MORON.AND BOBBYS ALL NO WE'RE JUST HOLDING HANDS CAUSE WERE FRIENDS.THEN IM LIKE NO FUCKEN DUU THIER GOING OUT.THEN TJ AND BOBBY RAN AROUND THE GUM AND BY THE TIME THEY CAME BACK SHE HAD LEFT.(THANK GOD) THEN I FINALY GOT TJ TO TAKE OFF HIS JACKET.I WAS SO HAPPY.I LOVE THE WAY BETWEEN EVER CLASS HE HOLDS MY HAND.AND AT THE END OF THE DAY TRAVIS TOLD TJ TO KISS ME.I THINK HE WAS GOING TO BUT STUPID EMILIO WENT OVER THERE AND HES ALL I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO GET A LILTTLE SOMETHING SOMETHING BUT UR CUSIN CAME OVER HERE.(LOL)AND I COULDNT HELP BUT BLUSH. IT WAS SO FUNNY.WE WERE ALMOST CHEST TO CHEST WHEN HE SAID THAT.(LOL)MY FACE WAS SO RED THOUGH.AFTER I COULDNT HELP BUT LAUGH.THEN WE WERE GOING TO GET ON R BUS AND DIONA PUSHED ME.AND I SO AM NOT GOING TO TAKE ANY OF HER SHIT.AND SO I PUSHED HER LIL PUPPY DOG ALEXIS AND SHES ALL WUT THE HELL U SICK BITCH.AND IM LIKE PUT THAT DICK AWAY I DONT WANNA GET RAPED.THEN IM ALL LIKE ATLEST I DONT HAVE LIKE 10 OR 17 PREGNESE TEST IN MY BAG.(I SAID THAT TO DIONNA).IM NOT GOING TO TAKE ANY SHIT THIS YEAR SO THEY JUST BETTER MOVE OUT OF MY WAY BECAUSE I RULED THE ELIMENTRY AND NOW IN GOING TO RULE THE HIGH SCHOOL NO MATTER WUT ANYONE SAYS!!!!!!!!!SO MOVE THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY AND MAKE SOME ROOM FOR THE FOR THE QUEEN OF THE SCHOOL.AND NOW ID LIKE TO SEE ANYBODY TRY TO TAKE IT FROM ME. WHOLE DATE:9/21/2011 TIME:8:12 MONTH:SEPTEMBER YEAR:2011 DAY:21TH PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS, I LOVE HIM AND I REALLY WONT HIM TO KISS ME SO BAD.I HOPE HE DOSE TOMORROW(SWEALS N LOL) (THOUGH I WONDER IF HES GOING TO THOUGH TOMORROW) TJ KISSED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OOOOMMMGGGG.TJ KISSED ME.LET ME START FROM THE BEING.OK WE WENT BEHIND THE SCHOOL LIKE WE ALWAYS DO.AND I GOT ON MY COMPUTER.TO SHOW TJ MY NEW PIC'S.AND ONES AGAIN HE SAT ARM TO ARM WITH ME.IT WAS FUNNY BECAUSE N LIKE ALWAYS TJ N BOBBY WERE THROING ROCKS. AND THEN WE WERE TALKING AND I ACSATENLY STUDERED.AND THEN BOBBY WAS CALLING ME STUDER AND MAKING ME STUDER.THEN TJ WAS TO.AND IM LIKE “U GUYS R MEAN”.THEN TJ COMES AND HUGS ME AND SAYS “IM SORRY IM SORRY”.THEN OFCORSE HE SITS NEXT TO ME AND GRABES MY HAND. SO WE'RE HOLDING HAND.THEN WE JUST SAT THERE WHATCHING THEM THROW ROCKS AT EACHOTHER.THEN TJ ASKED WUT TIME IT WAS AND IT WAS BOUT12:50 SO WE WERE PACKING UP.AND BOBBY SAID SHOULD WE START HEDING OUT.AND TJ'S ALL WE'LL START HEDING OUT AFTER I DO THIS AND IM STANDING AGENST THE WALL WITH MY HEAD DOWN AND HE PUT HIS HEAD IN THERE AND KISS'S ME.AND OFCORSE I KISSED HIM BACK.THEN HE SAID U NOW HOWS WARING MY JURSY TOMORROW AND IM LIKE ME HE SAID YES.THEN WE WENT BACK AND HE WALKED ME TO MUSIC AND S.S AND KISSED ME ON MY CHEEK.THEN HE SAT BEHIND ME AND PUT HIS ARMS AROUND ME.AND WHEN HE LEFT HE HUGED ME BUT I DIDNT I LET HIM KISS ME THATS THAT. WHOLE DATE:9/21/2011 - TIME:4:07-MONTH:SEPTEMBER-YEAR:2011DAY:21ST.PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS, OMG THE KISS WAS FIREWORKS.BUT I DIDNT TELL ANYONE THAT CAUSE I LOVE HIM SO MUCH............... TODAY I WORE TJ'S JURSEY WELL TO DAY NOTHING HAPPENED CAUSE THEY HAD A GAME.AND I DIDNT EVEN GET TO WARE TJS JURSY.CAUSE I DIDNT WONT HIM TO GET IN TRUBLE.BUT STILL AT LEAST I GOT TO HOLD HIS HAND.AND I LOVE HIM SO MUCH SO I DIDNT CARE. IF I DIDNT GET TO WARE HIS JURSY. REALLY I DONT GIVE A DAME .IM JUST HAPPY THAT I COULD GET A GUY LIKE TJ.A GUY THAT REALLY LIKES ME.THATS NOT JUST USING ME. AND I NOW TJ REALLY LOVES ME.HE'S THE FIRST GUY THATS NOT DATING ME JUST TO USE ME.SO THATS ALL THAT REALLY HAPPENED.ALL I CAN SAY IS THAT I HOPE HE CAN COME DOWN TOMORROW.SO WE CAN PLAY SPIN THE BOTTLE.I WONT HIM TO KISS ME AGAIN. WHOLE DATE:9/22/2011 TIME:7:08 MONTH:SEPTEMBER YEAR:2011 DAY:22ND PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS,AND I WILL KISS HIM.AND HOLD HIS HAND.AND HUG HIM.NO MATTER WUT SO I REALLY HOPE HE COULD COME DOWN. STUPID BITCH WELL TO DAY THEY DIDNT HAV A GAME AT LEAST.BUT TJ WAITED IN THE FRONT FOR ME AGAIN.OMFG TODAY WE WENT IN SIDE N DIONNA WENT OVER THERE N CALLED PETER LIKE HE WAS HER PUPPY DOG.I WAS SO BOUT TO SLAP HER.OMG WE WERE SLAPING EACHOTHRS ARMS CAUSE WE GOT R FLU SHOT YESTERDAY.AND BOBBY KEPT SLAPING MY ARM.N I WAS BOUT TO SLAP HIM.BUT I DIDNT.THEN THE BELL RANG.N TJ WALKED ME TO CLASS.N AFTER CLASS HE DIDNT SEE ME SO HE WALKED RIGHT BY ME.THEN HE WALKED ME TO CLASS AGAIN.N WE EMAILED EACHOTHER TILL I HAD TO TAKE MY TEST SO I HAD TO GO.BUT THEN AFTER HE STAIED WITH ME TILL I HAD TO GO TO PE.WE PLAYED VOLLYBALL.THEN WENT TO MATH.THEN WENT TO LUNCH .N WENT BEHIND THE SCHOOL.AND I GOT ON MY COMPUTER RIGHT AWAY THEN I PUT MY HEAD PHONES ON AND TJ WAS EMAILING ME AN WAS BUGING ME BOUT BEING MAD I DIDNT TELL HIM THAT I WAS MAD THEN HAV HIM KEEP BUGING ME IM SORRY BUT I WOULD HAV SLAPED HIM SO THEN WE LEFT AND WAS ALMOST LATE AND OMG SANTANA SAW ME HOLDING TJ HAND N I SO THOUGHT SHE WAS GOING TO TELL CEASER BUT SHE DIDNT SO I GOT REALLY LUCKY OMG HE STAID WITH ME TILL MY BUS CAME THEN HE HAD TO LEVE AND I WOULDNT LET HIM GIVE ME A HUG THEN I DID.SO THATS THAT. WHOLE DATE:9/23/2011 TIME: MONTH:SEPTEMBER YEAR:2011 DAY:23RD PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS,I WONT HIM TO KISS ME BUT HE ALMOST HAS.HE WAS SUPOSTO TO DAY BUT I DIDNT LET HIM.OMG I REALLY WONT HIM TO KISS ME AGAIN.THATS Y I WONTED HIM TO COME DOWN BUT HE HAS PRACTIC TODAY N A GAME TOMORROW.SO WE HAV TO RESCEDUAL.WELL THATS THAT.I LOVE HIM MORE THEN ANY THING IN THE WORLD LATE WELL NOTHING REALLY HAPENED TO DAY CAUSE WE WERE LATE.N ANFTER THAT I COULDNT LOOK AT TJ CAUSE WUT HE WAS WARING.IT WAS SO FUNNY.THEN LIKE ALWAYS WE EMAILED IN 2ND HOUR.THEN AT LUNCH WE WERE EMAILING EACHOTHER.N I TOLD HIM HES NOT A BAD BOYFREIND.AND I TOLD HIM I LOVED HIM LIKE 20 OR 30 TIMES.AND THE EXACT SAME LIKE ANYOTHER DAY.EXEPED HE DIDNT KISS ME.OMG I FREAKED OUT ON HIM YESTERDAY.DUDE I ALMOST DEACET HIM BUT I DIDNT.SO THATS THAT FOR TODAY. WHOLE DATE:9/27/21011 TIME:4:42 MONTH:SEPTEMBER YEAR:2011 DAY:26TH PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS,I LOVE HIM MORE THEN ANYTHING IN THE WORLD.AND I WILL CONTINUE TO LOVE HIM EVEN WHEN WE SPLIT UP.I WILL ALWAYS LOVE HIM NO MATTER WUT. NEVER PLAYING TRUTH OR DARE AGAIN WITH TRAVIS AGAIN WELL TODAY NOTHING REALLY HAPPENED.WELL NOTHING NEW EXCEOED THE FACT THAT AT LUNCH WE WERE PLAYING TRUTH OR DARE AGAIN.AND WELL IT WENT ALL DOWN HILL.CAUSE TRAVIS STARED GETTING PURSANAL.HE STARTED TALKING BOUT LAST YEAR.AND AS ALWAYS I TRY TO FORGET THE PAST.I FOR GOT BOUT DANIEL.N MY SISTER HAD TO GET PURSANAL WITH HIM TO.SO I DARED HIM TO KISS HER BUT THEN BOBBY CAME.N THEN IT GOT ALL WEIRD.N BOBBY WAS SO PISSED AT TRAVIS CAUSE TRYED TO KISS HIS GIRL.THEN TRAVIS HAD THE NEARVE TO SAY THAT ME N BOBBY WERE LEAVING HIM HANGING.N THEN I TOLD HIM “ NOW U NOW HOW WE FELT LAST YEAR “.N HE SAID “NO U LEFT ME HANGING WHEN U STARTED LEAVING ME HANGING WHEN U STARED TO DATE THET LITTLE FAG JJ”.THEN I JUST WALKED AWAY N WE LEFT.N TJ WOULD NOT LET GO OF MY HAND.LIKE I MEAN HE REALLY WOULDN'T LET MY HAND.WELL I THINK HE GOT MAD WHEN I HAD TO GO TO CLASS.THEN HE HAD TO GO TO HIS STUPID FUCKEN GAME.BUT WHEN HE CAME TO GET HIS STUFF HE GAVE MRS.ADAMS A HUG THEN LIKE NOTHING HE GIVES ME A HUG N SAYS BYE.THEN HE CAME BACK N GAVE ME MY LAI.WELL HE SAID HEAR CLARISSA N PUT MY LAI ON MY LABTOP.THATS THAT FOR TODAY.N AT THE END OF THE DAY I EMAILED HIM N ASKED HIM TO PAY MORE ATTENTION TO ME.N ASKED HIM TO STOP MESSING AROUND WITH TRAVIS.CAUSE IT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE WE'RE NOT EVEN GOING OUT. WHOLE DATE:9/29/2011 TIME:MONTH:SEPTEMBER YEAR:2011 DAY:27TH PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS, SAME SAME I'D DO ANYTHING FOR HIM.NO MATTER WUT IT IS I DONT CARE. MY FIRST HOMECOMING GAME WITH TJ TODAY IS HOMECOMING N ITS MY FIRST GAME WITH TJ.N IM SO HAPPY.CAUSE I GET TO SEE HIM OUT SIDE SCHOOL.AND IM SO HAPPY CAUSE IT WAS OUR FIRST GAME TOGETHER.OK FIRST WAS THE PORAD TJ N BOBBY WERE IN IT.N I SAW TJ HE HAD HIS STUPID HUGE SMILE.IT WAS FUNNY.THEN WE WENT TO THE GAME N RIGHT AWAY WE WENT TO THE GRASS.N JOSEPH WAS ALRETY STARTING SHIT WITH ME.AND AFTER WE WERE JUST MESSING AROUND.THEN BOBBY STARTED TO INGNOR MY SISTER N SHE GOT LIKE REALLY PISSED AT HIM.THEN I TOLD HIM TO KISS HER.N AT FIRST SHE WOULDNT LET HIM.THEN HE JUST KISSED HER N TJ TRYED TO KISS ME TO BUT I WOULDNT LET HIM.THEN WE JUST STUD AT THE FENCE N ME N TJ WERE POKING EACH OTHER. N HE BIT ME (LOL).IT WAS SO FUNNY BUT NOT COOL.THEN WE JUST STUD ON THE FENCE. THEN HIS SISTER SAID HE WAS IN BIG TROUBLE N HE SAID I BETTER GO BYE LOVE U.N I SAID BYE LOVE U CAUSE I LIKE HAD NO CHOSSE.THEN IT WENT ALL DOWN HILL CAUSE LIKE I WAS SAYING EVERYTHING GOSS AND WRONG WHEN TJ LEAVES.THEN BOBBY WENT TO GET TJ SO HE COULD COME COM ME DOWN BUT HE HAD LEFT THEN WE LEFT TO.THEY SHOULD BE COMING DOWN TOMORROW.I DONT THINK TJ'S GOING TO I THINK HE GOT IN REAL BIG TROUBLE LAST NIGHT. WHOLE DATE: 9/30/2011 TIME: 11:48 AM MONTH: SEPTEMBER YEAR: 2011 DAY: 30TH PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS,OMG IM GLAD WE HAD R FIRST GAME TOGETHER.AND IM SO GLAD IT WAS HOMECOMING.BUT NOW HE WONTS ME TO GO TO HIS GAME.I LOVE HIM SO MUCH :) :) :) :) :) :) OMG...........ALMOST KILLED TRAVIS TODAY WELL TODAY DIDNT GO LIKE PLANED.TRAVIS WAS TRYING TO START SHIT WITH ME , BOBBY,AND MY SISTER.THEN I WAS SO CLOSE TO BITCH SLAPING THE REAL BITCH JANITA.AND MARCAS TOO.SO CLOSE BUT COULDN'T CAUSE THEN I'D GET OCS N I WONUDN'T HAV BEEN ABLE TO SEE TJ.AND I LOVE THE FACT I THAT I GET TO SEE HIM.OK OK.FIRST HE CAME N STARTED TALKING CRAP TO BOBBY THEN HE WAS TRYING TO SHOW BOBBY EMAILS.THEN I STARTED TO TALK SHIT TO HIM AND HE HAD TO BRENG UP LAST YEAR AND DANIEL.SO I WAS ON A ROLL.JUST GOING ON AND ON.THEN I WALKED AWAY AND ALMOST CRYED AND TJ WENT TO SEE IF I WAS OK.AND I SAID I WAS WHEN I WASN'T.BUT WUT EVER.N THEN WE LEFT N I WENT TO MUSIC.AND AS USEWALL HE WALKED ME TO ALL MY CLASSES N AT THE END OF THE DAY HE GOT A KISS GOOD BYE N A SEE U TOMORROW.SO THATS THAT WHOLE DATE:10/3/2011 TIME:9:36PM MONTH:OCTOBER YEAR:2011 DAY:3TH PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS, I LOVE IT WHEN HE KISS'S ME. WE KISSED AGAIN TWISE!!!!!! WELL WE KISSED AGAIN TWISE.ONE AT LUNCH N ONE AFTER SCHOOL.LET ME START FROM THE BEGINING.OK OK HE WAS WAITING IN FRONT AGAIN.N WE WENT OUT SIDE THIS TIME.OK I'M JUST GOING TO SKIP TO THE PART WHEN WE KISSED.OK I WAS MAD AT HIM THEN HE KISSED ME THEN AFTER SCHOOL HE KISSED ME BYE AND THATS THAT. WHOLE DATE:10/4/2011 TIME:4:57 MONTH:SEPTEMBER YEAR:2011 DAY:4TH PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS, I LOVE HIM WITH ALL MY HEART. COLD Well today was really cold and nothing really happened. Exepet the fact. that I told TJ I'd always be mad at him .and I felt so bad for being a bitch. So wait go back first he came to hug me n I told him no. and he walked away n his face looked like what the hell did I do. then I went to talk to him and told him it was fine. n he said r u sure like 3 or 5 times n I kept saying yes. then we left. he walked me to class as normul and this time we got to email in class. n I told him that Travis said that he has to kiss me for at least 30 sec. and instead he kissed me for like 5 or 10 sec. Then he kissed me when his bus came n that was that. WHOLE DATE:9/5/2011 TIME:9:51 PM MONTH:SEPTEMBER YEAR:2011 DAY:5TH PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS, IM SO GLAD HE STARTED KISSING ME LIKE 2 OR 3 TIMES ADAY.LOL I LOVE HIM WITH ALL MY HEART. OMG TJ PUT HIS ARMS AROUND ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG OK OK.WELL AT THE BEGINING OF THE DAY ME AND ALEXIS WERE FIGHTING.THEN WE WERE MESSING AROUND PLAYING VOLLYBALL IN PE.THEN SHE TOLD ME THAT HER “SISTER” TURISA SAID “I CHRET TJ LIKE SHIT.AND I DON'T LET HIM HANG OUT WITH ANY OF HIS FRIENDS”.THEN AT LUNCH I WAS ASKING HER IF I COULD TALK TO HER.AND SHE HAD ALEXIS START TALKING SHIT TO ME.SO WE WENT UP THERE TO SEE IF THE BITCH WONTED TO SAY ANYTHING TO MY FACE AND SOME GUY HAD THE NURVE TO TELL TJ “COME HEAR METAL MOUTH”.THEN I HAD TO TELL HIM “SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU DICK”.THEN I TOLD TJ “ONLY I CAN CALL YOU METAL MOUTHAND HE SAID I NOW”.AND IN THE SECOND I WAS TALKING TO HIM MY SISTER PULLED ALEXIXS HAIR AND SHE PUNCHED HER IN THE FACE AND MY SISTER SAID “HELL NO” AND THEY GOT IN A FIGHT AND I KICKED HER IN THE RIBS AND PULLED A HAND FULL OF HAIR OUT OF HER HEAD.AND THEY GOT SESPENDID FOR 3 DAY.AND THEN AFTER SCHOOL TJ CAME OUT THEN HE SAID “THANKS FOR STANDING UP TO THAT GUY WHEN HE CALLED ME METAL MOUTH AND ONLY I CAN CALL YOU METAL MOUTH HE SAID I NOW”.THEN CAME FROM BEHIND ME AND PUT HIS ARMS AROUND ME.IT KINDA FELT WEIERD AT FIRST CAUSE HE ALWAYS WARE'S HIS BELD AND IT WAS ALMOST ON MY ON ASS .THEN MAIO KEPT PUSHING HIM FORWORD SO IT LOOKED WRONG.BUT THEN OUR BUS CAME AND WE HAD TO GO BUT BEFORE WE DID.TJ KISSED ME TWISE.AND TRAVIS KISSED MY SISTER FOR ABOUT 20 OR 30 SECONDS.CAUSE HE WONT BE ABLE TO SEE HER FOR 3 DAYS.AND THAT THAT FOR TO DAY. WHOLE DATE:OCT. 28,2011 TIME WRITEN:10:37 MONTH:OCTOBER DAY:28T YEAR:2011 PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS, I HOPE TJ KEEPS MOVING FORWARD.IM TIERD OF JUST HUGS,AND HOLDING HAND.I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM MORE THEN ANYTHING IN THE WORLD.I WONT TO ALWAYS BE WITH HIM.I'M HIS JULIET AND HE'S MY ROMEO. TODAY TJ SAID THAT HE WAS GOING TO BREAK UP WITH ME TODAY I WENT TO CHECK MY EMAIL AND I HAD A MESSAGE FROM TJ.AND IT SAID “HEY I'M SORRY I'M GOING TO BREAK UP WITH YOU”.AND I DON'T NOW WHEN.I CAN'T CHECK MY EMAILS TILL LATER.SO I GUESS WE'RE NOT FOR EACHOTHER.WELL THAT'S ALL I CAN SAY WITHOUT CRYING. WHOLE DATE:NOV. 15,2011 TIME WRITEN:9:26AM MONTH:NOVEMBER DAY:15TH YEAR:2011 PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS, NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS BETWEEN US BUT I'M GONNA LOVE HIM FOREVER.I CON'T NOW ABOUT HIM.SO THAT'S I GUESS WE'RE OVER. WELL THAT WAS US WHEN WE WERE TOGETHER AND THIS WAS US AFTER ITS OVER WELL I GUESS WE'RE OVER.BUT HE SAID WE COULD STILL BE FRIEND.I SAID KK(EVEN THOUHG I DON'T WONT TO).SO NOW I DON'T NOW WHAT TO DO I HATE BEING SINGLE.SO TRAVIS IS TRYING TO GET THIS GUY BRADLEY TO GO OUT WITH ME.HE'S 16.I REALLY DON'T WONT TO.BUT I SINCE I CANT HAVE TJ.I SHOULD JUST MOVE ON.HE TOLD ME TO GO OUT WITH HIM BUT I DON'T NOW.IF HE REALLY WONTS ME TO I WILL. DATE-NOV. 17,2011 TIME-8:44PM MONTH-NOVEMBER YEAR-2011 DAY-17 PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS,I'M GOING TO DATE BRADLEY.I DON'T NOW IF I CAN GO WITH SEEING TJ ANY MORE. I'M MOVING ON.BUT NO MATTER WHAT I LOVE TJ.4EVER AND ALWAYS. TRUE LOVE.I LOVE TJ.EVER AFTER. DAY I WISH WE WERE STILL TOGEHTER SO WHEN WE WERE DATING. I CAN'T STAND THE THOUGHT OF GOING TO SCHOOL ANYMORE.I CAN'T STAND THE THOUGHT OF SEEING TJ WITH ANOTHER GIRL. I WISH I COULD TAKE EVERYTHING BACK.REMEET HIM. AND THEN START OVER.I WANNA GO BACK TO THE BEGING START FRESH.OR GO BACK AND WISH I NEVER MET TJ.BUT IF I DID THAT I WOULD HAVE NEVER MEET.TAVIS,DANIEL,JJ,BRODY,BOBBY,AND TJ.THEN WHAT WOULD'VE HAPPENED.I WOULDN'T BE THE WAY I AM NOW.I WOULDN'T BE EMO AND I WOULDN'T BE ME.AND I LOVE BEING ME.SO I DON'T WANNA CHANGE A THING. BUT GO BACK AND STOP MYSELF FROM BREAKING EVERYONE'S HEARTS.BUT GO BACK AND TAKE BACK SAYING YES TO JOHN.I HATE JOHN.I DIDN'T EVEN SAY YES MY SISTER DID FOR ME.SO I WANNA GO BACK AND TELL TJ.I SHOULD.BUT WHAT DIFFRENTS WOULD THAT MAKE. HE STILL HATES ME. WHOLE DATE-NOVEMBER 19,2011 MONTH-NOVEMBER YEAR-2011 DAY19 PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS, I'M GONNA TELL.SOONER OR LATER.I DON'T WANNA RUAIN ANYTHING.I WONT HIM BACK.BUT I DON'T NOW IF I CAN.HE SAID I CAN'T.BUT I STILL WONT MY ROMEO BACK.HE DISERVE'S TO HAVE HIS JULIET BACK. DAY I FIGURED OUT HOW MUCH I NEED TJ WELL ITS BEEN TWO WEEKS SINCE ME AND TJ BROKE UP. AND ITS BEEN KILLING ME.I CANT GO BACK TO SCHOOL. I CANT FACE HIM.I MISS HIM MORE THEN ANYHING.IM KINDA LEARING HOW TO COPE WITH THE FACT THAT IM NOT WITH HIM.I'VE BEEN WRITING THESE POEMS.AND I DIDNT NOW THEY HAVE TO DO WITH TJ TILL I WENT AND READ THEM.I STILL WISH I COULD START OVER.LIKE A DO OVER.I'D TAKE BACK ALL THE THING LIKE CALLING TJ “TGAY,AND I DONT NOW IF HE GOT MAD CAUSE I CALLED HIM METAL MOUTH” BUT TRUTH BE TOLD.I LOVE GUY'S WITH BREASE'S.I DONT NOW WHY.BUT ITS LIKE FUCKEN SEXY MAN.I SHOULE'VE TOLD HIM THAT.BUT I DIDNT.(I'D KILL FOR TJ.OR EVEN HURT MY FAMILY ANYTHING) I WISH GOD COULD HELP ME WITH ALL MY PROMBLEMS.WELL THAT'S THAT EXCEPT THAT FACT THAT MY LIFE IS OVER. PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS, I'D KILL FOR TJ.OR EVEN HURT MY FAMILY ANYTHING. HE'S NOT THE SAME.HE'S DIFFRENT.AND THATS WUT I LOVE ABOUT HIM :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( FIRST TIMES WITH TJ FIRST TIME ME AND TJ HELD HANDS-FIRST TIME WE HELD HANDS WAS WHEN I ASKED HIM IF HE WAS CHEATING ON ME,AND THAT TRAVIS SAID HE WAS CHIKEN TO HOLD MY HAND.AND THE FIRST TIME I SAID THAT I LOVE HIM FOR THE FIRST TIME. WHEN-FIRST TIME WE HELD HANDS WAS WHEN I ASKED HIM IF HE WAS CHEATING ON ME,AND THAT TRAVIS SAID HE WAS CHIKEN TO HOLD MY HAND.AND THE FIRST TIME I SAID THAT I LOVE HIM FOR THE FIRST TIME. DATE :SEPTEMBER 16,2011 WHEN :IN THE MORNIG MONTH :SETEMBER YEAR :2011 DAY :16TH FIRST TIME WE KISSED – WELL WE WERE BEHIND THE SCHOOL LIKE ALWAYS AND IT WAS THE TIME THAT WE ALWAYS HEDE OUT.AND BOBBYS SAID “MAYBE WE SHOULD START HEDING OUT.”THEN TJ SAID “WE'LL START HEDING OUT AFTER I DO THIS” AND THEN HE KISSED ME.IT WAS TODALY UNCALLED FOR WHICH MAD IT WAY MORE ROMANTIC.OH AND I WAS WARING HIS HAT. DATE:SEPTEMBER 21,2011 WHEN:AT LUNCH MONTH:SEPTEMBER YEAR:2011 DAY:21ST FIRST DAY WE STARED DATEING -WAS WHEN I MET HIM THE DAY BEFORE.AND I ASKED BOBBY TO ASK HIM OUT FOR ME.AND HE SAID HE HAD TO THINK CAUSE HE'S NEVER BEEN ASKED OUT HE ALWAYS ASKED GIRLS OUT.BUT THEN AT KUNCH I HAD BOBBY GO ASK HIM WUT HIS ANSWER WAS.AND HE SAID YES.BUT I DIDN'T BELIEVE HIM SO BOBBY WENT AND TOOK HIS LAPTOP AND PUT IT NEXT TO ME SO HE SAT BY ME.THEN MARCAS G. ASKED HIM IF HE WAS DATING ME AND HE SAID YES.SO THATS WHEN WE STARED DATING. DATE:SEPTEMBER 14,2011 WHEN:AT LUNCH MONTH:SEPTEMBER YEAR:2011 DAY:14TH FIRST TIME HE PUT HIS ARM AROUND MY NECK-WAS WHEN I ASKED HIM IF HE WAS CHEATING ON ME,AND THAT TRAVIS SAID HE WAS CHICKEN TO HOLD.AND THE FIRST TIME I SAID THAT I LOVE HIM FOR THE FIRST TIME. DATE:SEPTEMBER 16 2011 WHEN:IN THE MORNING WHEN WE WERE GOING IN TO THE BUILDING.AND WHEN HE WAS GOING TO WALK ME TO CLASS. MONTH:SEPTEMBER YEAR:2011 DAY:16TH THE FIRST TIME I DISITED TO CHEAT ON TJ: WAS WHEN JOHN ASKED ME OUT AND I COULDN'T HELP BUT SAY YES IM SO SCARD TJ'S GOING TO FIND OUT. DATE:OCTOBER 13,2011 WHEN :AFTER MUSIC IN S.S. WHEN ME AND TRAVIS WERE WORKING TOGETHER.AND LONG AFTER I ASKED HIM IF HE WONTED TO BE MORE THEN FRIENDS AND THAT HE WAS GOING HATF TO ASK ME. MONTH:OCTOBER YEAR:2011 DAY:13TH FIRST TIME I DISITED TO BREAK UP WITH TJ:WAS WHEN JOHN ASKED IF HE COULD GET MY NAME TATTOED ON TO HIS CHEST.AND THE DAY HE STOLE MY HEART. DATE:OCTOBER 17,2011 WHEN:AFTER SCHOOL ON A HAFT DAY. MONTH:OCTOBER YEAR:2011 DAY:17TH FIRST TIME ME AND TJ BROKE UP-WAS WHEN I WAS GONE IN BEISBE.CAUSE MY CUSIN DIED.AND I DON'T NOW WHAT HAPPENED .ALL HE DID WAS EMAIL ME ASKING FOR HIS HATS BACK. DATE-NOV. 11,2011 WHEN-WAS WHEN I WENT TO GET MY HOMEWORK OFF MY MOODLE AND I HAD AN EMAIL FORM HIM AND IT SAID “I'M SORRY SHADOW BUT I'M BREAKING UP WITH YOU”.I STARTED TO CRY.I COULDN'T DO ANYTHING.MY LIFE WAS OVER.I LOST THE GUY THAT I LOVE MORE THEN ANYONE,OR ANYTHING IN THE WORLD. MONTH-NOVEMBER YEAR-2011 DAY-11TH FIRST TIME I REALASIZE I SHOULDN'T HAVE EVEN SAID YES TO JOHN-WAS WHEN I FOUND OUT TJ WAS CHEATING ON ME.AND WHEN I FOUND OUT TJ WAS DATING ALEXIS. AND WHEN I FOUND OUT THAT I CANT LIVE WITHOUT TJ. AND THE TIME WHEN I SHOULD HAVE NEVER LET GO OF THE ONE GUY THAT MEAN'S THE WORLD TO ME.AND THE DAY I REALIZIED THAT I DON'T DISERVE A GUY LIKE TJ. DATE-NOVEMBER 18,2011 WHEN-WHEN I FOUND OUT HE WAS DATING ALEXIS.AND I REALIZED THAT I LOST THE ONLY THING I LOVE MORE THEN ANYTHING. MONTH-NOVEMBER YEAR-2011 DAY-18 FIRST TIME I REALASIZE HOW MUCH I MISS TJ-2 WEEKS AFTER HE BROKE UP WITH ME.AND I THINK IM GOING TO KILL MYSELF.IM NOT GOOD WITH PAIN. DATE-NOVEMBER 24,2011 WHEN-2 WEEKS AFTER HE BROKE UP WITH ME.AND I THINK IM GOING TO KILL MYSELF.IM NOT GOOD WITH PAIN. MONTH-NOVEMBER YEAR-2011 DAY-24 TIME WRITEN Bobby “SEC. 3 BOBBY” ME AND BOBBY HELD HANDS SO TODAY WAS THE FEASTAVOL OF LIGHTS.AND ME,BOBBY,CHRIS,AND MY SISTER.WERE HANGING OUT.AND THEN WELL I'M JUST SKIPING TO IT.WELL FIRST HE HIT ME IN THE JGA.OK MY SISTER AND CHRIS WERE SUPOSTO KISS BUT I WAS SITING ON THE WALL RIGHT THERE AND BOBBY WAS BUGING THE FUCK OUT OF ME CAUSE I WOULDN'T LET HIM HOLD MY HAND.BUT THEN I THINK HE'S ALL “DO I HAVE TO”.AND I'M ALL “OH MY GOD FINE BOBBY FINE”. THEN HE TOLD MY SISTER AND CHRIS TO JUST FUCKEN DO THERE DARE ALRETY.CHRIS IS ALL “WHY” AND BOBBY'S ALL “I GOT MY WISH”.THEN CHRIS IS ALL “SHE'S LETTING YOU HOLD HER HAND”BOBBY SAID “YES”SO THEN CHRIS TOLD US TO GO.THEN THE PIRADE STARTED AND WE WONTED TO GO WHATCH IT BUT CHRIS DIDN'T.SO WE WENT HATF WAY SO WE COULD SEE.THEN BOBBY WAS TRYING TO KISS ME BUT I WOULDN'T LET HIM.SO WE WERE PLAYING FOLLOW THE LEADER CAUSE HE WOULDN'T LET ME GO.THEN HE KEPT ALMOST MAKING ME FALL.THEN HE FUCKEN HIT ME IN THE NOSE.AND IT FUCKEN HURT LIKE HELL.BUT HE SAID HE WAS SORRY LIKE ABILLION TIME'S.BUT THEN NO MATTER WHAT I WOULDN'T LET HIM KISS ME.THEN HE HAD TO GO.SO YA.THAT'S THAT. PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS, WELL MY SISTER AND CHRIS GOT BACK TOGETHER WITCH LEAVE'S ME WITH A BIG PROMLOM.CAUSE I TOLD TJ THAT WHEN MY SISTER BREAK'S UP WITH HIM WE CAN GO BACK OUT.THAT WAS THE PLANE BUT I FOUND OUT HOW MUCH I LOVE BOBBY.SO I CAN'T BREAK UP WITH HIM.I REALLY REALLY LOVE BOBBY THOUGH.SO HAHA TJ'S JUST GONNA HAVE TO WAIT.I LOVE BOBBY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! we got back together im so happy 12/13/11 FRIST TIME'S WITH BOBBY FIRST TIME ME AND BOBBY HELD HANDS-AT THE FESTAVIL OF LIGHT'S WHEN MY SISTER AND CHRIS WERE BE HIND THE WALL AND I WAS LOOKING AT THEM HE JUST GRABED MY HAND LOL. WHEN-AT THE FESTAVIL OF LIGHT'S WHNE MY SISTER AND CHRIS WERE BE HIND THE WALL AND I WAS LOOKING AT THEM. DATE :12/3/2011 WHEN :AT THE FESTIAVL OF LIGHTS MONTH :DECEMBER YEAR :2011 DAY :3RD FIRST TIME ME AND BOBBY BROKE UP-WAS WHEN I WAS MESSING AROUND WITH HIM ON THE PHONE.AND TOLD HIM THAT MY CUZIN SAW HIM HOLDING HANDS WITH ANOTHER GIRL.AND HE TOLD ME HE WAS WITH JACKIE. AND THAT IT JUST HAPPENED.DUDE I BEGGED HIM NOT TO.I TOLD HIM IT WAS FINE BUT HE SAID NO ITS NOT THEN HE HAD TYLER BREAK UP WITH ME FOR HIM. WHEN-WAS WHEN I WAS MESSING AROUND WITH HIM ON THE PHONE.AND TOLD HIM THAT MY CUZIN SAW HIM HOLDING HANDS WITH ANOTHER GIRL.AND HE TOLD ME HE WAS WITH JACKIE. AND THAT IT JUST HAPPENED.DUDE I BEGGED HIM NOT TO.I TOLD HIM IT WAS FINE BUT HE SAID NO ITS NOT THE HAD TYLER BREAK UP WITH ME FOR HIM. DATE :12/13/2011 WHEN :OVER THE PHONE MONTH :DECEMBER YEAR :2011 DAY :13TH Publication Date: May 18th 2016 https://www.bookrix.com/-bullet789
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-amealia-jessica-pond-amy-039-s-pregnant/
Amealia Jessica Pond Amy's pregnant! Melody's sister gets pregnant To my friends and family Chapter 1 Text: Amealia Jessica Pond Images: Amealia Jessica Pond Editing: Unique Campbell All rights reserved. Publication Date: March 6th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-lovablepuppy134
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-breannataylor-dear-daddy/
BreannaTaylor Dear Daddy, FINISHED! Dear daddy, I wish you where here. I miss you but mother says that you're in a better place. Sometimes, I leave my window open for you. I hope you come back soon. I try not to cry, but its hard. LOVE ALWAYS, YOUR LITTLE GIRL SAM. <3 I was five when I wrote that, when my father died. I cried every night,I even cried at school. I slept with my window open every night till I was ten. Someone told me that he was never coming back and said I was a cry baby. I came home crying that night, mother asked why but I ran in my room and broke all my pictures of of him. I had to tell my mom what happened. That girl who told me that was Cassie Sanders. Now I'm seventeen I live in the same place, same house. I don't have many friends and don't want to have many. My next door neighbor, well one of them is that same girl, the other one is a boy named Kiel and he is... friends with Cassie. I still carry a picture of my father with me. 12 years, hes been gone. I still cry sometimes. I am in class right now, planning to avoid everything. Now my mother is getting ill so I have to try for her sake. “ Hey, psst,” someone said. I looked up. Kiel was facing me. “ Go away,” I said! “ Class is over,” he said, smiling. Al ready? So fast? I got up from my desk and collected my things. He stood there waiting for me. When I walked out of class he fallowed me. “ What do you want? Why aren't you with Cassie?” I asked? He looked at me and laughed. “ I gave up on her, why? You jealous?” he asked? “ You wish,” I said. As I walked home, I thought about what Kiel did. I looked over at him and Cassie gave me a look. I wanted to tell her of, but about what and why? As soon as I looked back at him, he met my eyes. His dark brown eyes. Cassie slapped his arm. I looked away still thinking. “ SAM! WATCH OUT,”! I was in the headlights of a car, stunned. But, then someone pushed me away from the car. “ Are you okay?” Kiel? “ Fine,” I said, oping my eyes to see Kiel. “ KIEL! Get away from her she could have rabies,” Cassie yelled! “ Great, now shes comparing you to an animal,” I said. He got up and made sure I was okay. He walked back with Cassie and said to shut up. I stayed on the ground for a while. Well, until she went in her house. “ You sure,” Kiel said. “ Positive,” I said. He laid by my side. Then he faced me. He touched my arm, then played with my hair. I would have slaped him if I did care. It was so pretty out side, but there where a lot of gray clouds. Then it started to thunder.Drops of rain started to fall on my face. “ Hey, its raining come on,” he said pulling me to my feet. He dragged me in his house. Then, his mom looked at him funny. “ Where is Cassie?,” she asked? “ Mom,” he said! “ She is at her house. This is-” “ I know who she is. Shes the daughter of that crazy man,” “ MOTHER,” Kiel said! “ What? You know the one who-” “ SHUT UP! “ I yelled! I started to cry. My father, why can't I let go already? Hes gone,GONE! Kiel's phone rang. I listened to him talk. " Your mom is looking for you. I'll take you home,” Kiel said, taking my hand in his. I only nodded. We walked out and there was a long silence. Then I looked up... CHAPTER2 When I looked up.... there was a ambulance and cops. “ No, mom,” I said. I ran toward the the house. When I got there someone told me to stand back. “ That's my mom! I have to see her,” I yelled! “ Stand back!” “ Why is she here?” Kiels mom asked? “ Shut up mom,” he said leading me up stairs. His room was neat and clean. It even smelled good. He sat on his bed then looked at his clock. He looked at it for a while. “ So, do you think you could stay here for tonight?” Kiel asked? “ I guess. Where would I sleep? Is your mom okay with it?” He stood up in stood up in front of me, he was so close to me that I could feel his warmth and got nervous. He started to laugh quietly. “ Of course not, shes a mom.” “ If you only knew what I am thinking,” he said. He slowly walked away. latter on that afternoon, thinking about what had happened I went to check up on him. I walked down the stairs and looked out back. He was out there, his big hands griping the railing of the porch, his head was down. “ You did this to him, he likes you.” I ran off after hearing his mother say that. He looked in pain, his grip on that rail was terrifying. He was strong. I had found myself in the middle of nowhere after hours. I was tired and couldn't walk straight. After a while, I fainted. I woke up in my house. Didn't ever think about it. I lived in my house for five of six weeks. I still went to school avoiding Kiel. Sometimes I had to skip class to get away of him. I couldn't let go of what happened. I was walking home and didn't even notice... Hey Sam! Why have you been avoiding me?” Kiel asked? I turned around and looked him in his brown eyes. His eyes had sympathy in them. That's all I wanted, more sympathy. “ You don't get it do you? You don't get what you did to me? Wow, you're useless,” I said turning away. I'll tell you why I did that if you come with me home instead of going to your house, you left your stuff there,” he said. So I ended up in his house, again. He brought me to his room..... CHAPTER 3 “ What the hell were you doing in the middle of nowhere?” Kiel shouted? “ I-Is it true?” I asked, sitting on his bed? He looked at me confused. “ Is what true?” he asked, more calm. “ Your mom said you liked me, I ran out not thinking. Is it true?” I asked? He paused, froze. He had to think, so I think its not true. I knew it. “ It is true, I really like you. I didn't know how to say it, so I thought if I kissed you, you might get the hint. I saw fright in your eyes, not love then you turned your head I got upset,” he said his brown eyes never leaving my eyes. “ So, that's why you griped the rail so hard,” I said. “ But if you don't-” “ Why do you think I said that? I thought you didn't like me and your friends put you up to this. I thought that you were playing with my feelings,” I said. We sat there in silence, thinking what to say next. “ I love you”we both said. Then his mother called for him. He was gone for a while. I thought about him saying that he loved me and his expression. Brown eyes always told the truth. He came back smiling. “ How about staying with me tonight? My mom doesn't hate you after all,” He asked? “ Okay,” I said. We spent the day together, we didn't go anywhere but just being with him and knowing that he loved me was enough. As we did, I couldn't help but look in his brown eyes. We took a walk, well which was convenient for Cassie. “ Hey! Can I walk with you guys?” she asked? I looked at Kiel. PLEASE NO! Don't let her. But in the end Kiel said........ She walked along Kiel. Stupid big heart of his. We were walking threw town, I made sure I was far behind. But someone was following me, I could feel it. When they turned a corner, I got pulled back. “ Shh, its me Nova,” a voice said. WAIT,who is Nova? “ I am in most of your classes. Anyway, don't you see whats happening? Hes betraying you,” he said. “ Damn it, let me go! NOW!” I screamed! He unleashed his grip and I ran back to the house. LATTER THAT DAY...... Kiel got home at six, I was pissed at him. I didn't talk to him for the rest of the day. I thought that he didn't like her anymore. He was on the couch when I left him. I went up stairs to grab my stuff. When I came down someones arms wrapped around me. I had felt this feeling before, it was butterfly's. I got that nervous feeling. Hes not going to keep me here for long, remember I'm mad at him. “ Please don't leave, I don't know what I did but I still love you and I'm sorry. If its about Cassie, I wanted to know what happened. The night she called she told me that your mom was looking for you,” he said. I let him finish, but I wanted to scream Cassie you listened to that girl who tried to ruin my life? “ I can't believe you listen to Cassie! She could have hurt my mom! Don't you get it?” I yelled! He held me tight, as if I might slip away. I might have, I wanted so badly to know what the hell I did to Cassie. But there was something wrong with my mother. She was sick, the doctor said he would call me if anything unusual happened. They wanted to keep her over night. Every day I had to live with the pain of losing her as well as my father. I had to live with the gilt of not being there for her. My life was hanging by a thin piece of extinction. I might die any minuet too, some how. Can every thing be this way? I love it when I'm with Kiel, because I don't have to hide myself from him like everyone else. And he doesn't have to hide either. This way, we are both happy. I can't stay mad at him. But, I am mad at Cassie, I always have been. That is something that will never change. He told me what she told him. I didn't care for her words, I didn't care for her presence. I knew being with Kiel will be a challenge but its fine as long as it stays between us only. We had a sleeping issue. I slept on the bed, he slept on the couch. I didn't agree. He insisted “Can't you see? He is betraying you!” “ You're the princesses, right?” “ The royal owner has come back! Shes here!” They where all the same voice. Kiel? Dad? NOVA! “ DON'T LEAVE! I LOVE YOU!” I woke up in a sweat, it was a cold sweat. I probably screamed, I was in pain. Kiel was in front of me. “ Are u okay.......? … Oh your moms doctor called.” That's all it took from me to get up and rush to the phone. I was shaky, I couldn't walk straight. I fell uneasy, getting up right away. Th pain was getting worse, I had to fight it. I had to see how mom was doing, I needed to bet here for her. I had the will to go on. I stumbled to the phone. I called the number I faintly remembered, my finger were shaking so bad I couldn't dial the number right. “ Damn it,” I mumbled to myself. “ Call her latter you need to rest,” Kiel said, grabbing me. “ NO! SHE NEEDS HELP!” He wrapped his arms around me and held me tight, I was crying still trying to dial. It didn't work. Nothing did. I was hopeless. CHAPTER 4 I had to stop dialing after a while, Kiel made me. I had to wait a day before calling. “ Is this Pam Danfield?” I asked? “ N-No, she passed a day ago. You must be Sam,” the nurse said. “ P-Passed away? Oh god.” The nurse flipped some papers. “ Sadly, yes. Would you like to pick some of her stuff up?” She asked? “ Yeah. Bye.” I slowly slid down the wall, holding my mouth. Tears crawled down my face. I had lost everything, it was all gone now.I screamed. I was sad,mad,and lost along with my parents lives. I was pissed at the nurse because she acted nonchalant about it. Kiel found me, on the floor. He sat by me. Kiel took me to the hospital. I told him that I would call him to pick me up. He gave me a look, then drove away. He thought I didn't trust him. I got in the hospital room and I saw HIM....... TO BE CONTINUED ! NOTE : I WILL WRITE ANOTHER BOOK!!!! Publication Date: March 26th 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-breanna12
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-maclaicha-vampire-love/
maclaicha vampire love* LOVE chapter 1 MEETTING AT THE MOVIES TILL SCHOOL Today i will be going to the movie with my friend ohhhhhhhhhh i have to take a shower lena yes mom your friends here okay im coming. hey jessica hi lilly hi daisy you guys ready we always are ok lets go los like were here lets get popcorn and some drink okay, hey why you skipping the boy said i said my frrineds are on the line over there, im sorry(he have three bothers) here come my brothers whos the chick said david she just bump on me im soryy, i have to go, wait whats your name its lena, mines is javonte,bye javonte bye lena, hey what took you so long said lily, nothing i just bump in to those boy over there, whats his name said lily javonte lets go, movie sartted, okay lets find a seat over there whoa thats them hey lena said javonte,come sit over here okay this is my friend lily daisy jessica and lily oh and im lena lol this are my brother mario ryan and david oh and im javonte,movie over, bye guys hey lena said javonte give me your number so we could talk ok (blushi) its 561-666-5885 okay bye, i tough you guy left nah we decided to walk to you home could do you guys think he like me definitely oh im sleepy thanks for walking me bye , ooooh got to sleep have school tommorow lena wake up you`re going to be late for school okay mom done taking a shower slips my feet in my addidas my hair blacki wear a pink white tee shirt and my short pants, done okay, breakfats ready cool what we got pancakes bye mom bye sweetie, bel ring ding ding ding...... today class we have a new student said miss richardson huh its them the one we met at the movie javonte flirting wiht me david flirting with e sai jessica mario flirting with said lily ryan flirting with me said daisy boys have a seat bye those four girls over there lena rasie you hands.... so when did you guys change school my JAVONTE SAID, MY DAD AND MOM GOT A NEW JOB IN TOWN SO WE HAD TO MOVE I CANT BELIEVE WE MET AGAIN, ALRIGHT CLASS AFTER LUNCH WE WILL BE READING CHAPTER 4 THE HIMALAYAS HEY LENA JAVONTE SAID WANNA GO TO LUNCH WITH YEAH SURE U GUYS CAN COME TO SEATING AT THE CAFETERIA(THEY HAD PIZZA) WHEN I WAS ABOUT TO TAKE ABUT JOVANTE WAS LIKE LENA I LIKE YOU FOR THE FIRST TIME I SEE YOU WANNA GO OUT WITH ME, SURE SAID HOW ABOUT U COME TO MY HOUSE TONIGHT, MY FRINEDS GOT ALONG WITH JAVONTE BROTHER IT LUKS LIKE THEY GOING OUT WITH THEM WHEN WE GOT TO THERE HOUSE JOVANTE WAS ABOUT TO KISS ME I WAS GOING ALONG WITH BUT HE WENT FOR MY NECK, THEN HE STOP FOR A FEW MINUTE HE SAID, LENA I HAVE SOMETHING TO TELL YOU IM A VAMPIRE, I WAS LIKE WHAT HE SAID SEE I KNOW IF I TELL YOU, YOU WOULD HATE ME, NO IT DOESNT MATTER BUT IM A BIT SCARE BUT IM GOOD, WE STARTED MAKING OUT, THEN I HEARD ALL MY FRIEND S WALK INTO THE ROOM THEY WAS LIKE THEY ALL VAMPIRE IW AS LIKE I KNOW, SO THEY SAID IT COOL THEN, WEL TRY TO GET ALONG WITH IT, A FEW DAYS LATER......... ughrggggggggggggggrhhh i had a bad dream that javonte dad hit me with a dust pan it wasnt a dream it was reall my dint want me to tell you guy that we was vampire are you okay i should get you home its been two day you where on concious you dd only hit me with the pan once and ive been a sleep for two days wow hes really strong < Publication Date: April 19th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-shellanda11
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-tinyy-t-get-over-it/
Tinyy T Get Over It Chapter 1  I hug him as tight as I can, I wish the hug could last forever, it’s the last hug I’ll ever give him.  The more I hug him, the more it hurts, and the more I want to cry.  I inhale deeply, I can smell his soft manly cologne that I love so much.  When I look up at his face, my eyes flooded with tears.  All of a sudden large tears start shedding from both my eyes, down my cheeks.  He hugs me tighter, wipes it away says “I love you so much, don’t cry.” I can tell he is trying to hold back his tears by the way his voice drops and his eyes roll back.  He gives me the last kiss, and I finally see the tear that drops so quick from his left eye.  I wipe the tear away, “It’s okay Hunter, go live your dream.“  He holds my hand tight and he walks me to my bus.  We stand in front of the bus door and hug him one last time, he holds my hand while I walk up the stairs.  When I’m on the second step he pulls my arm, I spin, my hair swishes quickly and he steels one last kiss.  I could feel my hair in between our lips, but we ignored it because it wasn’t a time for nonsense.  I finally get on the bus, take my seat by the window.  I look at him standing outside, and I place my hand on the glass.  Then the bus pulls off, he waves goodbye to me after I signal him to call me, at least when he can. I cry all the way home wishing that I could reverse time or at least pause it so I could be with him just a little longer.  When I get home, I ignore everything and everyone around me I head straight to my room and lock the door behind me.  I realize how much my life is going to change with out him, it sucks to be so in love.  I’m happy because he is finally going to begin living his dream, but all the way across the country wasn‘t really what I had in mind.  He is going to a  school  for kids with special talents.  He is the best dancer I know and I want him to do what makes him happy, all this time the process of the auditions and  contracts  I’ve been going through mixed emotions.  It’s a very good opportunity for him to live his dream but at the same time it makes me sad because I’m going to be here just thinking about him and the things we could be enjoying together.  I’m going to miss him so much; I’ve been missing him before he even auditioned for that school.  He’s been in my life for a whole year and I can’t picture my life with out him.  I stay in bed all afternoon crying just hoping that he will change his mind before he gets on the plane.  I didn’t want to think about it but I also didn’t want to forget him.  From the minuet I got home that Friday afternoon I lay in bed miserable and depressed.  I was waiting all night for him to call but my phone never rang.  The clock struck 11:00, If Hunter hasn’t called by now I know that he didn’t change his mind he went through with it, he got on the plane and left.              I wake up Saturday morning and my face feels dry and puffed from all the crying of the night before.  I reach for my  cell phone  that’s charging next to me, its 11:09 and my head is pounding.  I decide to lay there for a few more seconds and those seconds become minuets, those minuets become hours.  I can’t get him out of my mind, I don’t want to think about it but he‘s really gone.  I’m sure he should be awake by this time because it’s almost 3 in the afternoon.  I called him, when he answered I wished he was still here, home, with me.  “Hello?”  He says in a low voice. “Hey, are you there yet?” I struggled to say whipping tears from my eyes. “Yeah, I’m here, I miss you.” he says “I miss you too.”  I said, crying “I miss you too; do you think I made the right choice by coming here?”  He asks. “I don’t know, maybe you did but you won’t realize it just yet.” I say trying not to cry anymore. “I love you so much; nothing is ever going to be the same.” “I know but let’s try to make the best of it.” I respond. “I love you!”  we both say at the same time, that meant we had to go.  Even though it feels like a stab in the chest I hang up first because I had to start getting use to saying “Good bye”.                     An hour later I manage to finally drag myself out of bed just because I had to use the restroom.  I look in the bathrooms mirror and I look a mess.  My hair is disorganized and tangled in every place possible.  I get in the shower hoping that with the hot water the swelling of my eyes and face will fade away.  I step into the shower and turn on the hot water before the cold.  I shampoo and condition my hair trying to get the tangles out.  Suddenly I don’t want to do anything anymore, I lay on the shower floor feeling the water get colder and colder against my skin.  I think to my self “It’s been twenty-four hours since we said “Good bye“.”  I lay on the shower floor until the hot water runs out and it’s completely cold.  When get out of the shower I go to my room and lay down again.  I’m not hungry, I’m not happy, I don’t feel like talking, I don’t have him, I do miss him, I do want him, I do need him, I do love him, and I would love to have him laying next to me.            Before I know it, it’s 6:03pm and I’m still lying in bed, with my eyes closed but I’m not sleeping.  I’m not crying anymore because the swelling of my face just disappeared completely.  I don’t want it to come back.  No one has bothered to check up on me all day not even if I unlocked my door after my long shower.  Then I heard a vibrating noise, it took me a minuet to recognize it.  It was my cell phone, I pick it up and I have a text message from Hunter. “I miss you so much, I love you, I’ll call you when I can everything is so crazy and I’m super busy I love you xxxo.”  I told myself that he will, certainly call soon but hours go by and my phone never rings again.  When it’s 10:00 pm I call him.  I knew it in my heart that he missed me enough to pick up his phone when I called. But sadly he didn’t it went to voicemail after ringing about six times.  It had been hours since I actually said a word to anyone; he was the last person I talked to this morning.  I opened my mouth slowly and left a short message.  “I miss you, call me back…I love you.”  I hang up the phone slowly and lay back down.  Then I hear my door knob move.  My mother peaks through the door and enters the door; she lies next to me on the bed and pulls my hair back. “Sweetie, come on get out of bed.  You can’t stay in your room crying and waiting forever.”  She says. “I just miss him so much, every single day for the past year we’ve been together and from one day to the next he’s gone.  My life has no meaning with out him.”  I reply with tears exiting my eyes. “It will get better soon honey, I promise.  Soon you’ll find someone else, forget about Hunter, and fall in love all over again.” “No!  I don’t want to forget him, I want him to come back and I certainly don’t want to find someone else.” I say trying not to cry. “I didn’t bother you all day because I knew you wanted to be alone to think about things for a while, but for gods sake Maria it’s after 10:00 and you haven’t eaten anything all day.  At least drink a glass of milk.” “I’m not hungry, I’m not thirsty.  But my heart is thirsty for him, my heart and I miss him.  I miss him.” I respond as she wrapped her arm around me and kissed me on the cheek. “You know that I’m not just your mom but I’m also your friend.  When you hurt, I hurt when you smile, I smile and I can’t smile right now because my baby is bleeding inside.”  She looks at me and touches my face, I suddenly think of Hunter because the first time we ever kissed he did the same thing.  He ran the back of his finger across my cheek and through my hair.  “C’mon Maria get up and eat something, write in your journal.”  She hands me my journal that’s on the other side of the bed and I shake my head.  “I don’t wanna write I feel too weak to do anything I just wanna see him.”  I say in a low voice.  My mom sighs “Why won’t you let me help you, Maria?”  She asks desperately.  I look into her eyes and turn away suddenly, “Because mom, you don’t know how.”  I cry in silence with my face turned away from her.  “How can I help you, what do you need me to do?”  She asks, I can tell she is getting frustrated with me.  I sit up in bed, biting my thumb nail as tears came rushing out of my eyes.  “take me to see him so he I can just see him face to face again and hug him and tell him how much it hurts, he’s the only one that can help me from my misery.”  I lay back down and whip my tears with the covers.  My mom hugs me tight, “Sweetie, call him, talk to him, and tell him how you feel.”  I look at her like she’s stupid, “I already called him it went to voicemail, he sent me a text message and he’s really busy.  What I want more than anything right now is to see him, and hug him.”   Chapter 2 My first day with out him   It’s Sunday night and I just want to see him, he hasn’t called and every time I call it goes to voice mail.  I have school tomorrow and I wish I didn’t.  Everything is going to be so different now that he’s gone.  I’m going to walk in the halls alone, I’m going to walk myself to my bus, I’m eating lunch with my friends for the first time in a long time, I won’t have a boyfriend to text in class and my life as I know it is gone.  He’s gone.            Monday morning I wake up to the sound of the alarm on my cell phone.  I take a deep breath and I finally exhale the air out of my lungs all at once.  I finally get out of bed turn on the light and the brightness of the light hurts my eyes.  I get dressed, put my shoes on and I brush my hair.  I skip the make-up because I have no one to get pretty for.  I grab my back pack and head for the door, then I look at the time and I still have 25 minuets before the bus comes.  Today I got ready a lot faster compared to the 40 minuets I usually take.  I sit on my bed and I call Hunter, hoping that he will answer so I could have some confidence for the day, so I could learn to face the world with out him. It rings, and rings, and rings, and he finally answers in a tiered voice that I am happy to hear, it’s better than going the whole day with out hearing his voice at all. “Hello?” he said answering his phone “Hey, it’s me I’m about to leave the house to go to school.” I said “Yeah?” “Yup, it’s just going to be weird with out you, why haven’t’ you been answering your phone?”  I asked as it all flashed back into my head. “I’m sorry babe; I’m trying really hard to juggle everything.” “What’s so hard about going to school and dancing, you did all those things when you were here and you still had time for me now you can’t even call or answer when I call you.”  I begin to raise my voice. “I know but I’m new here and I have to get settled into my room.  I hardly know how to get around the school.  Everything is a little harder, I’m starting to question myself.” “If you want to come back, just make sure it’s the right choice.” “You’re still gonna wait for me, right?”  He asked “Yeah whatever you do, if you stay I’ll wait for you to return and if you decide to come back I’ll be here for you.” I look at the time and I head out the front door while still talking to Hunter. “So you miss me, huh?”  He asks sounding anxious to hear my response.   “Yeah, big time.”  I miss you so much I feel like more than half of my heart has been ripped out of my chest.  I wish I didn’t have to face school with out you.” “I wish I was still with you, don’t forget to write me a letter every time you can.”  He said reminding me. “Don’t worry, but you should squeeze time into your day to text me, call me, or right me a short letter and mail it to me.”  From a short distance I see two orange lights blinking and coming closer and closer. “Hunter text me during the day or something the bus is here and I have to go.” “I love you!”  We both say at the same time, then I hang up slowly take a deep breath while I watch the bus stop in front of me, I finally get on the bus and take my seat by the window as always.  The bus pulls of and I stare out the window the same way I did Friday when I was waving good-bye to Hunter.              When I get to school I walk alone to Homeroom and I walk alone in the halls thinking about Hunter all day.  At lunch I search for the table where we all sat when Hunter was still here, my friends Kim and Nelly knew I was sad so they gave me a hug when I sat down with my tray of food.  “You okay, honey?”  Kim asked “No, I feel like…I’m no one… like everything has been taken from me… I feel so empty.”  I say trying not to cry. “Don’t say that, Maria.  You still have us and were still your friends.  Says Nelly as she rubs my back.   I’ve known all of them since Elementary school so they know me pretty well.  I pick up the bottle of water and drink it, and I just want to go home and lie down, fall asleep and do absolutely nothing.  I pull my phone out of my pocket, and text Hunter.  “I’m having lunch with out you for the first time ever.”  Fallowing a sad face, I wasn’t expecting for him answer but he did.  That just made my day, even If I still missed him it made me feel a little better.  I read the text message slowly because I didn’t want the moment to end.  “I’m having lunch too, I wish I was right next to you, I miss you so much.”  Then I smiled so big ignoring everything around me.  I replied quickly “OMG, I miss you too, have you made any new friends?” I asked I was looking forward to talking to him on the phone soon.  “Yeah, in my dance class everyone is friends I’m especially talking to Joe and Emma.”  I thought it was nice for him to make new friends, but I want to be his number one the way it had always been.  Even if my day was okay with out him I still miss him and I still want him here with me, I’m just not used to being with out him.  Since we became boyfriend and girlfriend we’ve been together 372 days of my life with him and on the 373rd day he had to leave.             The days with out Hunter fly by, they go by tardily not fast enough.  But I manage to make the best of it because things weren’t going to change anytime soon.  It feels so weird to walk around without holding someone’s hand, to kiss no one, to sit out with my girls and not him during lunch.  Things are changing dramatically for me.  My grades have dropped a letter, and I have lost ten pounds in the past few weeks.  Even if I don’t realize it I don’t eat at all I don‘t remember the last time I had a meal.  Now the tight clothes I use to wear are baggy and loose.  I have to wear a belt to keep my jeans at my waist.  My daily routine is the same everyday.  I wake up, go to school, text Hunter during lunch, come home, shower and I go to bed.  I’m always tired, I cry very often, I barley communicate with my family, I’m never hungry, I never feel like doing anything.  I promise my friends and parents that things are going to change soon, but to me that means if he’s no here everything will always be black and white and in my world it will always rain even if it’s sunny outside.            When Hunter calls I wish our conversations could last forever but he always has something to do.  I know I should be patient with him because I promised him that I would but, sometimes (always) I wish that he would give up on himself and just come home.  To be with me, to see his family, to put the rest of the world on pause and to just love me.  I wish he could be here, I had to let go of my best friend and my boyfriend at the same time with out wanting to.  Someday I have to breathe in life again and live, the only problem is that I don’t know how.  I don’t know how I’m going to see the world with the eyes that are only used to seeing him.  Someday it has to happen, but when?                      Today I got home from school and for the first time in 4 weeks I heard my stomach growl.  I was hungry, I wanted to eat.  I wanted the best homemade Mexican tacos only my Mom knows how to make.  Filled with lots of chicken and all the goodness a taco should have.  I can feel my mouth watering just by thinking about it.  But my mom isn’t home to make then, so I make myself a grilled cheese sandwich instead.  The melted cheese taste a million times better than it ever did.  It seemed like I hadn’t eaten in ages but it had only been a few weeks.  I had a rather strange way of eating, during those few weeks I wasn't eating, I would eat little things. Maybe a glass of orange juice or a few cookies, but I would hardly ever had a full meal at all. I never noticed how much I was letting myself go, until now.  Of course I noticed that I wasn’t fitting into my clothes the way I use to but, I thought it was nothing.  Minuets after I finished eating my Mom got home.  When she sees me sitting at the table and not in my bed sleeping, I know it comes as a big shock for her.  She looks at me with her eyes wide open and it takes her a few seconds to smile and notice the plate in front of me.  She walks up to me and kisses me on the forehead, “How have been  mija ?”  She asked with her pretty Spanish accent.  I look at her and return the smile, I hadn’t smiled in such a long time that I found it relieving, I don’t know why.  She sits down in front me, “I’ve been doing a lot better, Mom.  What about you I feel like I haven’t talked to you in years.”  She looks at me with her head tilted just a little, and a little smile.  One of those smiles that warms me up inside and makes me remember how much I love her.  “I’ve been good,  mija.   We’ve missed you around here.  It seems like a ghost town without you hanging out around the house.”  She says. “I don’t think things will be like that anymore.  My life has to continue, right?” “Right, you have to live.  I’m so happy you came to your senses.”    Chapter 3 Building a bridge and trying to get over it    Today, I finally did my make up again, I focused in class, I laughed and joked all day the way I hadn’t done in such a long time, when I got lunch today I actually ate it.  When I sat down in lunch with my girls I enjoyed the gossip they were spilling about the teachers and the new girl, Bianca.  I decided not to text Hunter during my lunch period, because I wanted to catch up with my friends.  The friends I set aside to be with him all the time, the friends that loved me so much and still welcomed me with hugs when he left.  Now I feel like living more than ever.  I haven’t hung out with them in such a long time. “Do you girls wanna go to a movie this weekend, or something?”  I asked. “Really? Are you serious?  We haven’t gone out together in such a long time.”  Says Kim “I know right, it’ has been a really long time.” Nelly comments “So is that a yes or a no?”  I ask.  “Girl you know we wanna go out, what did you have in mind?  Asks Nelly “Well I actually wanted us to decide together, we could have a movie night at my house if ya’ want.”  I suggested “When this Friday, I mean I can go any day, but Fridays are better.”  Says Kim “Yeah Fridays are better.  Ya’ wanna come Friday night like at seven, or so.  Ya bring the movies, and I’ll have the food at my house.” “Nelly and Kim look at me with a big smile, I can tell they are excited, just as much as I am.  “Maria, you know we’re so happy that you’re finally on your two feet again, happy because you’re a lot happier now and that we can hang out like we use to back in the day.  Right Kim?” “Yeah I mean, When your man left you were always sad and all depressed all the time now you’re, finally living again.  That makes me happy, we love you girl.  Says Kim as she rubs my hand and shoulder.  “I love you guys too, Ya better hush because ya are going to make me cry with all the corny stuff ya saying.”  I can feel my face getting hot and blushing.             It’s finally Friday and I’m getting everything ready for the girls to come over tonight.  I made guacamole, from mashed avocado, kool-aide for us to drink, and I have a bunch of candy so we can get hyper.            During the movie I couldn’t stop laughing, I don’t remember the last time I laughed this much.  I laughed so much that my abdomen began to hurt.  We love to watch ghetto Comedies with a bit of Drama.  To my surprise Hunter called me in the middle of the movie.  I had my cell phone in my purse which was in my room.  So Hunter called the house phone instead.  When the girls and I heard the phone ring we didn’t know it was him.  But when I told them who it was I know that they seemed bothered by it.  Kim made a snobby facial expression and Nelly just cut her eyes.  I went into the kitchen to speak with him, while the girls continued to watch the movie in the Living room.   “So, what’s going on, I’m surprised you called.”  I say “Maria, I left you a voicemail telling you, I was going to call today, at this time.  Didn’t you get my message?”  I asks. “Actually I haven’t been looking at my phone lately.   I forgot to take it off of mute.  Cause’ you know, I be in school all day.  Sorry.”  I say quietly “What have you been up to?  You haven’t been calling me or texting me the past few days.” “Yeah, I’ve been with my the girls the pat few days, I feel like I abandoned them for a long time.” “So, you with them right now?”  he asks.  “Yeah, we’re actually having a movie night.  Remember me and you use to watch movies together?”  I say as my mind flashes back to the memories. “Yeah, I remember everything.  I miss you so much.” “Hunter, do you mind if I call you later I want to watch the movie.” “Yeah, go enjoy yourself.  Be good and take care of yourself.  I love you.”  He was surprised because I didn’t want to talk to him at the time, and i have to confess I was kind of shocked myself because I'm always eager to talk to him.   “Don’t worry babe, I‘ll be fine love.”             I get back to the movie with the girls and they didn’t seem to mind, because they knew how much I wanted to have this movie night without any interruptions. “Sorry, ya we just miss each other that’s all.” “No girl don’t worry about it, we understand.”  Says Nelly “Girls I only stayed because this guacamole you made is poppin’.”  says Kim.  I look at both of them wondering what was on their mind.  Then I finally say  “I blew him off, for ya.”  Kim and Nelly look at me and then at each other “Yeah, we know you blew us off in the past for him, and we always forgave you.” says Kim.  I cross my legs and my arms.  “I think it’s the first time I ever did it to him, though.”  I say.  “I miss him and all but I just want to hang out with ya’, because its been a long time and talking to him makes me feel sad.  That’s something I don’t need, I need to live, I need to be my age, right?” “Yeah, that’s what you need to do now more than ever.  Girl you know we always got yo‘, back, you know we always here for you” says Nelly and Kim just smiles, and I can tell they mean everything they say.  The rest of  the night me and the girls watch movies and eat all the left over, then we go online and I watch them make fun of all they’re ex boyfriends on the social network.  They made sure I smiled the whole night, and I didn’t regret hanging up the phone earlier that day.   Chapter 4   As the days went by, and I worried less and less about Hunter, I had more and more fun.  Because after time passed I began to realize that he was always going to be in my heart.  The more fun I had the more I cell phone rang.  Hunter was taking time out of his schedule to keep our relationship going.  I wrote and received letters from him all the time, almost every three days.  I scribbled little hearts with our initials in all my school notebooks, I texted him during lunch and class all the time and we video chatted every once in a while.  I talked to him almost every night for hours.  Sometimes I spend so much time talking to him that I only get three hours of sleep.  But my motivation for school and life helps me to get good grades and still have fun.  I really miss him but I can’t let his abandonment rule the rest of my life.  I began to spend more time with my parents now, we go out to the movies, restaurants, bowling and swimming together.  We now have dinner together more than we use to.  I tell them all about my school life and my relationship with Hunter.  I’m their only child and I know they want to be involved in my life as much as possible.            Tonight my parents and I are going to a Mexican restaurant to have dinner and I can’t wait to tell them about my week.  When we got to the restaurant (  El Barbero‘s Grill)  we took our seats I ordered what I had been longing  for all week.  The towns greatest cheesiest Quesadillas.  I can just feel my mouth watering while I tell the waitress what I want in Spanish “ Por favor deme tres Quesadillas y una limonada.”  right after I ordered my lemonade I felt my pocket vibrate, right then I began to smile even more. “ Dios mio , Maria doesn’t that boy leave you alone for just one second.   Parese que ni le importa la escuela  that he tried so hard to get into.”  My Mom said, I knew she was kidding because she winked at my Dad, I saw it in the corner of my eye.  I opened up my cell phone and It was Hunter, I hadn’t noticed but it had been months since he had been gone and spring break was right around the corner he told me he was flying back to South Carolina for those two weeks.  I love the way he started that message.  “ Dear love of my life, I’m getting two weeks off for spring break and I get out on the same day you do, I’m coming to South Carolina to see you.”  I was happy to read the text message I wanted to receive since the day he left.  I looked at my Parents, and grinned with so much excitement.  My Mom looked at me with curiosity, “What’s your problem?”  I look at her and my Dad at the same time and I tell them.  “Hunter is coming for spring break We get out of school on the same day.”  I finally say trying to stop smiling.  “That’s very good honey.  I’m sure you’re very happy.”  My dad says.  “Yes Papi, I’m very happy.  I can’t believe it’s been three almost four months since he left, this is the first time I see him beside the video chats.” I say, then when the food comes my attention changes and my mouth continues to drip like a water fall.  I dig my teeth into the best food in the world.  My parents asked me about my grades and as usual I told them how well I was doing, because it was the truth.  When Hunter left the first few weeks my grades did drop but I managed to bring them up again.  Then my Dad asked me a question that made me a little uncomfortable and insecure.  “What if you and Hunter can’t make your relationship work after all?”  I looked at my Mom wondering what made him ask me such a thing but she also looked very puzzled.  “Well me and Hunter are both very mature and reasonable people, I’m sure we could make things work or make plans.  Why do you ask.”  My Dad,  looks at me and laughs “I’m just messing with you  mija.”   He grabs hold of my hand and looks at me very sweetly.  “I know you are a very mature young lady, because me and your mother have raised you to be just that.  Me and your mother both know that this separation isn’t easy for you but you are mature to make it work.  I’m proud of your maturity.”  he leans over the table and gives me a soft kiss on the forehead and he says “ Mi princessa,  my treasure my baby,  te quiero .”  I glance at my mom and I know she is touched by the moment.  “ Princessa,  remember your  quinceanera ?  Remember when we gave you permission to date, soon you’re going to get married and be a mom.”  She says.  “Yes  Mami , I remember my special day, but I won’t be getting married any time soon I’m only sixteen, soon to be seventeen.”            For the rest of the night me and my parents talked about old memories and the day of my fifteenth birthday, and I loved those Quesadillas.  But then in the back of my head even if I knew my Dad was just kidding, the Question did repeat in the back of my head, “What 1if me and Hunter can’t make it work?”  Then what will happen.  I didn’t want to think about it too much because I didn’t want to imagine another painful moment like the one I had just gotten over.  Later  that night I called Hunter and he seemed pretty excited about coming back home.  I listened to him telling me all his plans for us, “I’m going to take you for a romantic walk around the same park where I asked you to be my girlfriend, them I’m going to take you to the Ice cream shop around the corner, I’ll take you to the movies and tell you how much I love you, I’ll kiss you until the sun sets.”  I listened to him and suddenly remembered all the things we always did together.  “Hunter, do you remember our first kiss?” I asked.  ‘How can I forget, it was my first kiss too.  You didn’t even know how to pucker your lips.”  I laughed because it was true, I was a little girl when I became his girl when I kissed him I was in high school but I was still young.  I had never had a boyfriend before and it was all a new experience to me.  He gave me my first kiss and the very first touch of love against the cambers of my heart.  He made me smile, with every action of love he showed with every wink he gave me.  Every time he held my hand, I fell in love with him all over again.  He is my man, he makes me smile with every word he says.  I smiled all night because talked to him all night long.           The next morning was Saturday and I woke up the weird movements.  I was confused when I woke up and Kim and Nelly were jumping on my bed like wild animals.  In my head I was like “What is wrong with these crazy behind girls, and how did they get in my house this early in the morning.”  I sat up an threw my pillow at them, they know I’m not a morning person. “What the hell, are ya’ll doing here?”  I asked playfully.  “Your Mom let us in, lets go to the mall girl, she told us Hunter is coming some time in the next couple of day and we want to take you shopping with us.” says Nelly.  I was going to tell them myself but I guess my mom got ahead of me, but why are they here so early.  “I’ll go to the mall but, dang man it’s to early.”  I groaned.  “Girl you better get yo’ lazy behind up it’s almost 1 in the afternoon, what you talkin’ bout early, get yo behind up.”  Kim had the ghettoest little voice ever.  “For real?” I yelled and gasped as I sat up in bed.  “You must’ve been on the phone with yo man last night, tell me I’m wrong.” Kim knows she’s right.  “Girl yeah I been talkin to that boy all night we got off the phone like at 5 a.m.  I tiered but, it’s Saturday.”  I groaned as I lied back down.  Nelly pulled the covers off of me and Kim pulled my arms.  “Take a shower and get dressed you lazy bum!”           We joked around for a few more minuets and then I finally decided to get out of bed because, I really did want to hang out with them today.  So I wouldn’t feel bad when Hunter came home, when my man comes home we will spend those two weeks together like we always did.  Chapter 5 I love you, I surprise you, I missed you  It’s Tuesday and tomorrow, is our last day before spring break.  I’m excited because by tomorrow night I’ll be hugging and kissing the love of my life for the first time in months.  Months that have felt like an eternity, months that have seemed forever, months that I’ve missed him and dreamt about him.  I texted him during lunch and it was so strange that every response he texted me was the same thing, “I love you!” I thought it was very strange because he always has something new to tell me.  I stopped texting him and I continued with my day.  After fourth period I went to my locker to put my books inside, the same locker me and Hunter shared the whole time we had been dating, when he left it was so empty.  I opened it taking my time, when I opened the metal door of the locker I saw a beautiful white rose lying there alone in an empty locker with a card under it.  I picked up the rose and sniffed it, slowly and carefully opened the card from the envelope.  I read the words and I had no idea what was going on.  I placed my books in the locker and brought the card and rose with me, still wondering who it had been from.           When the last bell rang I searched for my girls in the halls I didn’t see then so I went outside to the parking lot to get on the bus.  Was walking and smelling the rose at the same time, just minding my business and concentrating on the sweet smell.  When all of a sudden I feel two warm hands over my eyes, I knew it was Nelly because she does that to every one, even her dog.  “Nelly get off me I know It’s you  loca .”  I said    knowing that girl didn’t speak a bit of Spanish, but she didn’t let go.  “Nelly get your hands off my eyes I can’t see!” she finally releases and I turn around and look at her and so surprised, so stunned, so happy and my eyes full of tears.  It took me a few seconds to react but, when I finally threw myself against, him.  It was Hunter who had put his hands over my eyes, I jumped on him and wrapped my legs around his waist, he spun me around and kissed me the way I hadn’t been kissed in what felt like decades.  When he finally put me down, I hugged him for a long time and he whipped my tears away the same way he did when he left my side.  But this time my tears were from happiness.  He looks at me with so much warmth with such sweetness he tells me in a serious voice “I love you.”  I was still shocked and the words finally escaped my lips, “What are you doing here?  I thought you didn’t get out of school until tomorrow.”  he smiled and just kissed my cheeks.  “No I told you I got out tomorrow, doesn’t mean I was telling the truth I actually got here the morning and I wanted to surprise you just as much as you wanted to see me!  Did you like your Rose?”  I looked at him and gave him a little kiss, “I loved it, and I love you.”  he holds my hand and he leads the way, to the car.  “Where are we going?” I asked still crying because of so much happiness, “I’m taking you to spend the rest of the afternoon with me, my Dad let me barrow his car.  I went to your house while you were in lunch and I spoke with your mom so she knows you’re with me.”  He kissed my hand and opened the car door for me.            The rest of the afternoon we did everything he promised we would do.  He took me on that walk around the park, we laid on the grass and just stared at each other for a long time, no one said anything but at the same time saying so much with just our sight.  When it got dark he took me, to get ice cream around the corner.  When we sat down I asked him questions about his new life.  That’s when I realized that it wasn’t what neither of us thought it would be like.  “Do you like your new school, in LA?”.  He looks down at the table and takes his time to respond, he looks up at me and says ” I like it but, its so hard I barley have time to breath the hours are so long and they expect you to be dedicated to dancing all the time.”  I look at him, with sweetness “But that’s your passion, isn’t it?”  I ask  “It’s something I love to do, sometimes I question myself, and sometimes I wish I had never left.  If I had never left I could still be here with you, so wouldn’t have to be alone so much.”  I didn’t want to tell him, because I knew that it would’ve made him feel useless but I knew I was never alone I was always with my girls, with my parents, or out having fun and being me.  I was never alone, since he left my life had been fuller than ever, the only thing I needed was him.  I ate my ice cream, enjoying the sight of him in front of me, I couldn’t stop smiling.  He was so perfect, he had a manly voice, he was taller than me, he was thin but muscular, he made me realize love for the first time in my life, he showed me everything I always wanted to see, and he was a good dancer.  I loved him more than anything, he’s my man.           The rest of the week I spent it with him, he took me to the beach and out to eat on Wednesday, Thursday we went to the movies and out for ice cream, Friday night we went to a club and we danced almost all night long, Saturday he came to my house and I made snacks for us to eat. We listened to all of our favorite love songs together he sang to me even if we both knew he sounded horrible.  It felt good to feel the words of his voice make every cell in my body shimmy.  We spent all day together at my house doing nothing, just being together and loving each other.  When I played the last song on the play list, it made me realize it more than ever.  That I wanted to be with him for the rest of my life.  We sat on the couch in my room looking into each other’s eyes falling in love with each other the way we had always done a million times.  We hold hands, and kiss, our bodies come closer and closer his kisses come stronger and stronger with more feeling each time.  I can feel him breathing onto the skin of my neck as his kisses go lower and lower.  Then all of a sudden everything flashes back into my head and I yell, “Stop!  My parents may catch us then they won’t trust us anymore!”  He looks at me and smiles, “You’re right…wait I just remembered that when we were listening to music, I heard your mom yelling down the hall that they would be back in a couple of hours.”  I suddenly remember the same exact thing, I guess I’m just nervous because I was shocked that it was the first time we had been this close.  Our whole relationship was always about respect, honesty, trust, and love.  Sex was never a priority for us, and it would’ve been both of our first time.  “Maria, it’s okay if you don’t want to.  I’m not in a rush for anything this isn’t important for me, we can wait forever if you want to.”  He kisses my forehead and hold me against his chest.  I look at him with more love with him than ever, “No it’s okay, I want to.”  I continue to kiss him and we whisper “I love you” in each other’s ears as we undress each other, slowly.  It was a little painful but when I realized that I was with the person I had loved for such a long time, it made it seem like the pain wasn’t there.  He was making love to me for the first time in our relationship and we were enjoying every second of it.  When it was over we laid in bed together, just staring at each other, he kissed my forehead, and I kissed his lips.  We stared at each other for such a long time I almost fell asleep, until my cell phone rang.  It was my mom calling me telling me she was going to be home late because she got a flat tire, “ Mija,  I just called to tell you I we are going to be home a little later than we had planned, because we got a flat tire and we’re getting it fixed right now  princessa .” she says “That’s fine  Mami  Hunter is still here keeping me company, don’t worry I’m fine.” I say as Hunter holds my hand.  “Okay,  princessa  bye.”  I hang up the phone and I never wanted to forget this beautiful moment of my life, I had shared the most special thing with the person I loved, my man Hunter.  I loved him more than ever.  We laid in bed for a little while longer, just holding each other in the sheets and cuddling.  When we finally got up and got dressed he helped me make my bed so my parents wouldn’t notice anything.  He helped me wash the dishes from our snacks, we sat in the living room watching comedy shows and when my parents got home they seemed to believe the whole act, but they’ve always trusted Hunter they have no reason why not to trust him.  When it was time for Hunter to leave, he shook my Dads hand, he hugged my mom and I walked him to the car.  We stood outside the car hugging for a long time, because we were both so happy, when I walked outside my legs felt weird because I had just lost my virginity, but I was happy.  We kissed and then he told me what he felt.  “I’m so happy that we were together today.  I’m happy because I’m with the most beautiful girl in the world.  I’m happy because today was one of the best days I have ever spent with you, I love you.”  He kissed me again, and then it was my turn “Well I’m happy because today everything was perfect, I’m happy because you’re my man, and because I own the heart of the best dancer in the world and the love of my life.  I love you.”            As soon as he left I went into the house and texted Kim and Nelly I told then almost everything.  I was texting Hunter at the same time, and Nelly brought up a good point “Now that you gave your heart to him do you think this separation will be harder than the last?”  It was something deep to think about or imagine.  But I told her I didn’t think it would be, because this time I was sure that he was going to come back, I was sure that he was the love of my life, I knew I was going to be with him for a long time, and my dreams were coming true.  Now I felt more committed to him and more in love with him than ever.  This time I was really his women and he was really my man.   Chapter 6 Going against stimuli   The next week me and him, spent it together I tried to leave my house as early as possible so I could be with him longer.  I always had to be home before 10:00 pm and he always made sure I got home on time.  It didn’t matter where we were or where we went the only thing that ever mattered was that we were together.  Everyday that we were together I wished that it could last forever.            Two days before he left, I was trying to prepare for his leaving.  As the hours passed I found myself more distant from him each time.  When I went to he picked me up Thursday morning, so we could go to his house and watch movies, I went to the kitchen to make popcorn and on the way back I sat on the other couch, and no on the same couch next to him.  “Babe, why you sitting all the way over there?”  he asked as he came and sat next to me.  I ignored him as if I didn’t hear him.  “Maria, what’s the matter?”  I still didn’t say anything, he came towards my face and tried to kiss my cheek but I turned my head.  “I know you have to leave, but I don’t want you to go.  After all the loving memories we shared these past two weeks and you’re leaving again.”  I finally say as I rest my head on his shoulder and he puts his arm around me.  “I wish I didn’t have to leave either, but I have to it’s school and I want to make my dream come true no matter how hard it’s going to be.  I love you.”  he says kissing my cheeks.  “Hunter I’m just going to miss you a lot more this time.  I don’t want you to go all the time we spend together I wish it lasted forever.  These two weeks have gone by so fast.”  I say.  “But, you know I’m going to be back as soon as I can, and if you need me call me, text me, and if it’s really important I’ll fly out here just for you.”  the rest of the day I felt really lonely even if he was with me and I even got the urge to cry a few times.  But I didn’t, when he left I knew that it would be okay because I had already faced to world with out him, but with my family and my girls.  I wasn’t going to be lonely I was just going to miss him.  Then the question my Dad asked me at the Mexican restaurant made me wonder (“What if you and Hunter can’t make your relationship work after all?”)  what if we really can’t make it work I can’t just simply get another boyfriend, I’ve been with Hunter for too long, he knows me more than anyone, he understand me, he loves me and I love him.           The last night he was in town he took me home.  He walked me all the way to my room, and I begged him to stay a few more minuets because in the morning he had to leave.  He actually ended up staying until midnight.  We laid in my bed staring at each other the way we did after we made love for the first and only time.  I saw him crying and I knew he didn’t want to go, but we couldn’t really do anything about it, no matter how much we both wanted him to stay, his school was still waiting on him  Monday morning with dance routines for him to perform.  When he finally left, we stopped crying.  We stood outside the front door saying our good byes.  “I love you, with all my heart I will never forget you and I will always love you.”  he whispers in my ear.  “I hold on to him for as long as I can, and I kiss him for a long time because it’s going to be a long time before I kiss anyone again.  “I love you, with all my heart, I will be faithful to you always, I will cherish our love for ever.  I love you.”  he kisses one last time our lips move in the same direction at the same time.  We kissed even longer this time and I didn’t want our lips to part.  But when we finally did he got in his car and this was a little of the opposite of the first time we had to say good bye, this time he was getting in a vehicle and he was waving to me and he signaled for me to call him.  I suddenly remembered it all as it flashed back into my head.  That night I just couldn’t sleep.  I was tossing and turning in bed all night, trying to make myself believe that everything would be okay between us.  Just hoping that when he returned that nothing would change and that everything will be the same between us.           When he was gone for the second time, I found it very hard to be myself.  My body wasn’t the same, it wanted me to fall into a deeper and longer depression than the first one.  But I avoided it as much as I could.  I tried as hard as I could to go against what my body wanted and desired.  Every morning when the sun rose, I felt tiered even if I had slept ten or eleven hours I still wanted to sleep.  So instead of sleeping I got up, went running, I took cold showers.  I noticed myself crying for little things like losing my favorite shirt or simply because my phone would go dead.  But when I was alone that’s all I ever wanted to do, that’s why I was always with someone.  Always.  I was always with either one of my parents, with my friends, and even playing hop scotch with the little girl Brenda that lives down the street.           No matter what happened or how I felt Hunter was always a part of my life and I was always a part of his.  His letters continued to arrive every other Friday, he called and text messaged me everyday at the same times, and we would video chat very often.  He had always been and never stopped being my man and the small things he did showed me and let me know that I was and had always been his women.  He was on my mind all the time and this just made me want him to come home more, it made me realize that he was worth all the waiting. Chapter 7  Today is finally Friday, today a letter from Hunter should be coming.  When the school bus drops me off at home the first thing I do is check the mail and I see the letter from him.  A pretty light green envelope with his name on it.  I carefully open the letter and I read it still standing at the mail box.    Dear Love of My Life,           Today and everyday I hear your voice over the phone makes me want a kiss from your sweet lips.  Every time I do a series of flips on stage I imagine that I’m flipping into your heart.  I wonder if you may feel the way I do, if you get sad and lonely the way I sometimes do, and do you ask yourself the same questions that I ask myself.  Can you sleep at night with all those “What if’s”  running through your head.            What I’m trying to say is that I miss you and being here in LA is like being in a drought for a century, because I’m not with you. A drought that has advantages and disadvantages, My life feels dry and  deserted with out you.  But I have faith in us, that we will work out and that we will soon be together again the same way we were before I came here.  I promise everything will be the same when I finally return into your arms.           I love you with all my heart and I hope to see you as soon as I can, please be patient with me because this temporary separation isn’t easy for me either.  I love you, I miss you and say “Hi” to you parents for me. Oh yeah and before I forget I just want to say I love you.    Hunter                   I sigh when I finish reading the letter because the things he goes through aren’t different from the things I feel.  I do ask myself questions and I imagine the worst case scenarios, like him meeting another girl or what if he gets hurt while dancing or an unexpected accident that could take his life and take him away from me for real.  I don’t like to think about these kinds of things, but I guess I should expect the unexpected.  My attention is suddenly taken away from the letter, I can hear a car coming.  The music is so loud that I can imagine the vibrations if I were in that car.  When the car comes closer and closer I notice the color.  A dark blue like the night sky, the car so shinny and so clean.  I went inside before the car got closer to me.  When I was inside I peeked out of the living room blinds and the car was there for a few minuets and I felt like who ever the driver was he knew I was looking onto the street.  When the car left I went to my room and I read the letter again and I wrote him a letter in return.   Dear Love of My Life,           I wish you were here, so I could be with you all the time the way I use to.  But its time that we get use to this temporary separation.  Not ending our relationship just simply keeping in mind that we will certainly be together soon, that life is continuing and no more sad talk.  Even if we still miss each other terribly we should focus on the happy times and the positive thoughts, because I think that our “What if’s” and our negative thoughts just make things harder for us.  Don’t worry about anything.  Live your dream with out any bad thoughts on your mind.  You will always be my man and I will always be you women.  We should be convinced that our love will last because we were together for a more than a year and I gave you my heart so you could cherish it and have it with you always.  I gave you my heart the same way you gave me yours and I love you.  Remember no more negative thoughts and continue to have trust and faith in our love.  Focus on our future.  Maybe this separation will make our relationship stronger after all.  I love you and I miss you.   Maria                     Later that afternoon Nelly calls me, I just assumed Kim and her wanted to come over to watch a movie or something. “Hello” I answer “Hey girl, what’s up!” “Nothin’ girl I just finished writing a letter for my man.  What about you?” “Girl it’s Friday and I know I wanna hit up the club.” “Girl you might as well live at the club, you’re always there.”  “That is like my second house, you know.”  she says laughing “Yeah, I know you go there so you can rock up all over boys.”  I say teasing the way she dances. “Oh so I’m the only one, you don’t rock up on yo’ man.” “That’s another story, don’t even get it twisted.” “How is that different?” “You said so yourself he’s my man.  On the other hand the ones you got feeling up on yo’ lil booty, are just lil horny boys that you hardly know and don’t have any kind of respect.  My man respects me, okay.” “Yeah girl whatever I didn’t call you so you could give me the sex talk I called you so you could go with me to the club.” “You want me to go to the club with you?”  I say uninterested, and pointing at my chest.   “Yeah man so you can shake yo thang, you down?”  “I don’t know man, I got to--” “You do not have to study so don’t even come up with that lame behind story.”  Her rude behind cut me off, and interrupted me. “How you know I don’t have to study.” “Girl I’m in all your classes, I know.”  Damn I forgot she was in all my classes. “Alright man, I’ll go but just for a little while.” “That’s what’s up get ready and I’ll pick you up in a few hours.” “Alright I’ll see you then.” “Alright bye”           This girl acts like she has to go clubbing almost every weekend.  I remember when I began going out with Hunter we would go to clubs together, he would dance battle with the other dancers there.  I roll only with the best so my baby always won.  I put the letter in an envelope and give it to my mom to mail for me.                     Nelly picked me up at nine o’clock sharp and when we stepped into the club the party was poppin’ all the colorful lights were flashing everywhere and everyone was on the dance floor dancing and having a good time.  I knew I wasn’t going to get to crazy so I went over to the bar and ordered a lemonade, while Nelly went to shake her ass.            I look over at one of the tables and I notice a young girl around my age leaving with a guy.  She was dressed in a teeny-tiny black skirt and a sky blue tank top and black heels.  The guy she left with looked about five years older than her he was tall, dark skinned, and had a small beard.  He was dressed in jeans and a green t-shirt.  They came closer, I could her their conversation.  “Were going to your car right?”  the girl said as they passed me, then the guy said “Yeah, even if I just met you I know you’re special.”  I didn’t want to judge because maybe what I thought and what was going to happen were  two completely different things.  But the truth is, when a guy sweet talks a girl and takes her to his car after just meeting each other and him telling her she’s special only one thing can happen.  I was sitting at the bar sipping on my lemonade, moving to the sound of the music.  Then I spot a guy with spiky brown hair looking at me.  He smiled, waved and winked at me.  My mind flashed back to the girl and the boy that had left earlier that night and I didn’t want to be her in a few hours.  So I ignored him and turned the other way.  I could see Nelly shaking it on the dance floor, we made eye contact.  She signaled me with her hand to come over there.  I shook my head saying “No.” but when I saw the boy with the porcupine hair style coming towards me, I dashed out of my seat and went to shake my ass too.            Through out the night the guy kept running into me.  I know he was doing it on purpose.  He needed to get a clue because I didn’t want to talk to him.  I wasn’t interested in him at all,  he should go find someone else.  After trying to avoid him for a while I was thirsty again, I had been shaking my booty all night and running away from someone I didn’t even know.  I asked Nelly to come back to the bar, so I could get another drink. “Look at the one that didn’t wanna come.”  she said poking her lips out and pointing at me.  “Shut up.”  I said swallowing down the ice cold lemonade. “I’m happy I brought you, I can see you’re having a good time.”  she said fanning her face with her hand.  She was sweating, because it was crowed and because of all the dancing we were doing.  I couldn’t even remember the last time I danced this much.  “Girl there is a stalker up in here.”  I said glancing over at the porcupine head.  Nelly turned around to look at him. “Talk to him, he seems cute.”  she said not keeping in mind that I had a man.  “Hell no, I don’t want to talk to that boy.   Girl I got a man, Remember that.”  I said slamming my drink down gently. “Well yo man ain’t here.” she said, I looked at her “Yes he is.”  I said, Nelly took a minuet to look around and then back at me.  “Where?  I don’t see him.”  she said, I pointed at my chest right where my heart is.  “He’s right here I said.”  Nelly looked at me, trying to understand.  “Look I’m not asking you to go home with him.   But he’s at the palm of your hand.  He’s been chasing after you all night trying to talk to you.  At lease give him a chance.”  she said holding my arms, trying to convince me.  I figured I could at lease make a new friend tonight. “You’re right, I’ll walk over there and introduce myself.”  I said as I forced the tiny smile on my face.  I looked over to the other side of the club where he was standing.  I began to walk toward him, then Nelly spanked my booty.  “Go girl.”           I kept walking and he noticed me coming to him, just when we made eye contact, I froze and I walked to the restroom instead.  I walked in and leaned on the sink catching my breath.  I looked up at the mirror and I was blushing.  I heard heals on the floor and I could see Nelly looking at me through the mirror with sympathy.  She approached me.  “What happened?”  she asked chasing to look in my eyes. “Nothing, nothing happened.  I didn’t wanna talk to the dude.”  I said.  She rubbed my shoulders and my back.  “You wanna go home?”  she asked, I looked at her. “If you’re ready to go, then I am too.” I said quietly, she took my hand and we walked out of the club together.            On the way home no one said anything, but I didn’t want to make her feel uncomfortable or guilty so I began to talk. “It’s like….like…I don’t know.”  I said not knowing exactly what to say.  Nelly seemed a little shocked, I don’t think she was expecting for me to talk so she gave me a quick glance.  “What?”  she said as if she didn’t remember what just happened at the club.  “Maria, talk to me.  What’s wrong?”  she was trying to keep her eyes on the road.  “I don’t know I feel kind of weird talking to another guy.  I feel like, if I just talk with a guy or flirt with him I would be unfaithful to Hunter.”  I said looking down, and feeling awkward.  “But, Maria you didn’t do anything so don’t feel bad.  You’re a great girlfriend to Hunter.”  She said, as we looked at each other.  “I know but it’s just kind of awkward for me.  I guess because I know he’s not here and---.  I don’t know.  I don’t want to get involved with another dude not even as a friend because anything can happen.  You know, we don’t always make our destiny or future, it makes us.”  I said looking at her. “I think I get what you’re saying.  But don’t beat yourself up, because you don’t know what could’ve happened on the bad side.  The guy could’ve drugged you or even the both of us.  Who knows what else could’ve happened you know.”  she brings up other worse scenarios and that kind of made me feel better.  I didn’t know why I felt that way, It was something like stage fright. “You know Hunter was the only dude I could express myself to, because he was my only guy.  My first boyfriend I guess it’s because he’s all I know.” I said, rolling down my window. “Yeah, I know what you’re saying.  Then you lost you virginity to him so that makes it harder.  Right?” “Yeah, since we had sex.  It made everything more real for me.  Like now I know our relationship is going to survive, that maybe in the end of this little separation crap we’re going to be closer.  You know.”  I glance at her to make sure she understand where I’m coming from. “Yeah girl I know what you mean.”  We pull up to my drive way, I reach over to hug her goodnight. “I hope I didn’t spoil you Friday night.”  I say. “Don’t worry about it, I care more about you than a club.”  she says winking at me.  I’m so lucky to have friends like her, she worries about other before she worries about herself.  “I’m still sorry.”  I insist.  “You don’t have to apologize, it’s fine.”                     It’s been weeks since Hunter was in town and things don’t seem so bad, since I sent him my last letter.  Time is going by so fast and so many things are changing for me.  The things I always cared about are going down the drain.  My habits have changed, I’m not exactly the same.  I use to eat dinner with my family every night, now I just eat junk food or I don’t eat at all.  I remember that I use to check my cell phone every two minuets.  Now I could care less about who calls me or texts me.            I haven’t had a deep conversation with my friends or parents in a while.  I just want time for me, I feel bad because maybe I used them to try and replace Hunter but it was nearly impossible.  I think I should take time to find myself and to kind of bring myself back to life in a way.            The only time I talk to Hunter is when he calls the house because I never carry my cell phone.  We don’t get into anything too serious.  We just keep in mind that either way, if he’s busy or if we can’t actually talk on the phone and be a normal couple through long distance.  He’s still going to come home to me, we‘re still going to be together.                        Monday I woke up late for school so I rushed to get dressed.  Them I took my slow time and I walked outside to the bus stop.  Before I knew it the bus had passed me, and I didn’t seem to care, I kept walking as if I was going somewhere anyway.  I walked around the neighborhood with my hands in my pockets.  I was thinking to myself, “Should I go back home?  Should I just walk it’s not far at all?  Should I just ditch?, it wasn’t my fault I missed the bus.”  Then I see the shinny, clean, blue car again and I remember the last time I saw it.  It was parked perfectly against the grass and cement.  This time I could see the driver.  It was a male, and I could feel him looking at me.  I made it seem like I was looking somewhere else.  The car stayed parked, in perfect position and he got out slamming the door and he started was walking towards me.  My senses told me to turn the other direction and to runaway.  Most people would’ve done so, but I’m not most people I’m me.  I stood there and I watched him come towards me, I wasn’t intimidated by his walk or by the look in his eyes.  I simply gave him a warm smile as he came closer and closer.  He stood in front of me and began to question me. “Are you waiting for something Miss?”  He said with a rough voice that I liked, and didn’t scare me at all.  “Actually I was waiting for the school bus but it already left, so I’m just standing around.  Trying to decide what to do.” I responded, he looked at the ground then back up at me, “If you need a ride to school I’ll take you  Mami , there’s no problem.” he offered. “No that’s fine, I don’t think I want to go today.”  I said as I stared at the tattoos on both of his arms.  He was dressed like a guy in one of those gangster movies.  With big baggy Dickies pants that held onto his waist with a navy blue belt, he rocked brand new Nike Cortez shoes and a plain white Polo shirt.  “So what are you planning to do all day today, Baby?  Just stand out here and watch the cars go by?”  He said being sarcastic. “No I think I’m going to walk back home and probably sleep for the remainder of the day.”  I said smirking at his comment. “Don’t you care about school, Baby?”  He asked, I looked at him with a curious face, “Wait, hold up I don’t know you at all and you don’t know me.  We’re out here on the side walk of the street having a normal conversation and we don’t even know each others name.”  I say and I could see the tiny smile he made when he looked at the ground a little ashamed of the situation I was bringing up. “You’re right, chickita.  My name is Marcus But I usually just go by Mark.  What about you baby doll-- no let me guess.” “Okay lets see if you can guess my name and my age.” I smiled at the challenge.  “Isabella, Your name is Isabella and you are at least seven-teen.”  He seemed pretty sure of his suggestion. “Nope, I’m sixteen but my name is not Isabella it’s much prettier than that.”  I said smiling. “Okay, if you give me a little hint I promise I wont get it twisted this time  hermosa .”  He still insisted making things harder when he could just ask me to tell him my name. “It’s one of the most popular names in Mexico, and my name is in the Bible.”  I said as I told myself in my head that if he didn’t get this right he was a total dumb ass.  He took his time until he let my name escape his lips “ Maria ?  Tell me I’m wrong.”  He joked around.  “You got it, that’s it.”  I said nodding my head feeling like I had known him my whole life. “Really, my moms name was Maria.”  he said with the smile fading away.  That’s when I knew she was no longer with him. “What happened to her?”  I asked. “She passed away when I was five, since then I’ve been brought up by my step dad whose a stranger to me and I’ve known him forever.”  he said taking his time saying it as I tried to picture it in my mind. “Wow, I’m sorry.”  I said “Do you still live with him now?” “Yeah we just moved here almost a week ago.”  He explained that they moved so he could stay out of trouble.  He told me he got kicked out of school for fighting and drugs.  “Really, you must be a really bad boy.”  I said “Yeah, I haven’t been to school for the past year or so, because I was in jail for a while cause’ word got around that I was selling drugs.”  He said spitting at the ground “But fuck them, you know because I’m the only one that knows my life story.  I’m not scared of jail, I ain’t scared of admitting shit, I know what I did.”  “How long you been free?” I asked feeling sympathy for him “I been out for like four months, I’m hustling and living the hard life.”  he said I could tell he was being honest with me even if he had just met me. “So you still selling drugs, Mark.” “Selling, using, sniffing, smoking, everything you cant think of.” He may be a drug addict or a drug dealer, but I had to admit he was being really truthful to me and to himself about it.  I liked that about him,  people will do so much bad things knowing it‘s wrong.  But they wont own up to it they wont accept it.  Instead they will try to cover it up or live behind an image.  But Mark was different he wasn’t afraid to define his past.  “Wow, you’re not scared of going back to prison?” “I really wouldn’t give a shit if I did.  It’s not like I have so much in jail but I don’t have anything outside of it either.  I have nothing besides myself.” “So how long did you say you’ve been living in this neighborhood?”  I asked changing the subject.  “I’ve been here for almost a week, sexy.”  He is so flirty, OMG. “Well, I hope you like it here.  I’ve lived here all my life and it’s pretty nice and quiet.  I know almost everyone but just by name, because as you can see it’s not such a big neighborhood.”  I say as I look at the time on my watch. “So are you finally deciding to go to school?”  he asked. “I don’t know, what do you think?  Mark.”  his name came out of my mouth like a waterfall that hadn’t fallen for such a long time. “No you shouldn’t, you can spend all day with me.”  He said smiling at the offer he had proposed.                     When I got in his car I didn’t know what to feel, what to say or what to think.  I didn’t know what to expect, but it was okay.  Ironically felt very safe, like nothing could harm me.  I wasn’t sad I wasn’t crying I wasn’t doing anything but taking a risk.  Living life and trying to draw out my future using my imagination.  I tried to imagine what would happen during the rest of the day.  What does life have in store for me?   Publication Date: February 18th 2014 https://www.bookrix.com/-zz4ae5804ec2035
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-caitlin-colbert-mending-molly/
Caitlin Colbert Mending Molly To all of those who've found themselves in the midst of a great loss. The ones you love will always watch you grow. "Hang in there sunshine, the rain will stop" Ice cold. I remember each flake as it passed my eyes and grazed my cheek. Winter was always one of my favorite seasons, but now it has only come to bring me sorrow, and another bout of immense heartache. I feel neglected, though i’m sure he couldn’t manage to pay me any mind while he’s six feet under me, sleeping. I suppose his soul rests with his body, but knowing him he went to venture out into the world beyond my world. For once, that didn’t sound so awful. His talent for playing the piano still lingers on my mind, as his name does on my breath. It’s a sigh away from a tear, and as I take another step closer to his grave, his name in plain sight. I am reminded that once again, everything i’d ever done was for him, and everything he’d ever done in turn, had been for me. I awoke to the sound of November rain, hitting my window, beating like a drum. The sound was calming and to it, I could sleep another day and night. I swung my feet over the bed and let them dangle benethe me. Humming to myself a song to the rain, I looked at the clock. It was odd knowing that I was now homeschooled, in fact, it was just downright dreadful. I felt sluggish and not in the mood to fool around with my mother this morning. Lord knows she’d been awake for hours, most likely moaning and groaning about everything that needed to be done in our already spotless house. With my younger brother Steven in the hospital, and my older brother Jermey insisting on enlisting in the army, she was stressed. I’ve often wondered if most of it was my fault. Seeing as how I am an emotional wreckage, who, despite her greatest efforts is constantly in and out of the hospital as much as Lindsey Lohan is in rehab. I brushed my teeth and combed my hair, opening my laptop I began my schoolwork. Withing five minutes my mother was knocking on the door, she sounded cheerful, but I knew it was temporary. My father would be home from his business trip soon, and she was stressing about the next fight between them, and the next fight between him and Jeremy. “Molly, i’d like you to come with me shopping this afternoon” I nodded at her request and didn’t look up from my session. “Also, try going to see Steven today, it’s been nearly a week since you’ve last seen him. I’m sure he misses you” “I doubt it” I mumbled. I knew this upset her, each time I avoided Steven. I didn’t hate my brother, quite the opposite. In fact, my brothers and I have always been close. When Steven got sick, it turned my entire world upsidedown. I refused to go into the childrens ward, look into his eyes and see the sorrow benethe his smile. It just wasn’t an option. It pained me to watch him die, knowing that he couldn’t be cured and would be gone before Thanksgiving. What sixteen year old girl wanted that. He wouldn’t be happy with me, i’m sure Jeremy told him about my last few eating episodes and he’d ask to see my arms. I’m sure the sight of them would send him into another episode. I couldn’t bear that. “Bryan called last night, you were already asleep. He’s stopping by to pick you up, and offered to take you to see Steven this afternoon around three, alright?” I shook my head but I doubt she noticed. She sounded tired, and I don’t blame her much. She’s always tired, having to pretty much force food in me, and sit on me so I don’t rush to the bathroom and vomit the contents of my stomach and then some, fighting with Jeremy over his army desicion, and then poor Steven who has Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease which causes holes in the brain. He’s now bed-ridden and is on round the clock care. I continued my schoolwork as I heard Bryan’s truck in the driveway. I would normally go down to meet him but I was almost done with my paper, so I figured this time he could come and meet me. He opened the door just as I hit send. Cyber School was so much better than regular school. Fast paced and I didn’t have to worry about anything stupid with hormonal teens. The only bad thing was I was missing Bryan during the day. He hugged me and placed a gentle kiss on my lips. “You ready” He asked, I nodded and slipped on my flats. “You look nice” I didn’t dare tell him how I thought I looked, I didn’t need him feeling bad. I felt as if I looked like I weighed about 300 pounds, and gross. In reality I weighed only about 96 pounds and it was really starting to show, if I knew how to stop the cycle I would, but i’m terrified of being over-weight. Funny thing is, the more I lose the more I fear being under-weight. I starve as punishment, and because of my punishment, losing weight is a consequence. I was silent the entire drive to the hospital, and as we walked down the halls, passing the childrens rooms my heart began to ache. The doctor had just walked out of Steven’s room as we approached. He smiled “Molly, it’s great to see you here. He’s not doing so good today though, i’m sure this visit will put him in a more cheerful mood.” I nodded “How bad is he today” I asked, trying my best to hide my disappointment and sadness. “I know you’re hopeful he’ll get better, but that would take a miracle. I can see it in your eyes, Molly. His memory is a little fuzzy, more so than usual, also he’s coughing up blood again and the headaches have started. I’m going to call your mom and tell her to be prepared” I held my breath and the tears that threated and stung my eyes. Tonight was it. I would lose something so close to me, tonight. I had a feeling, I just hoped things would slow down, get better. You know? I entered his room, smiling and looking hopeful. He smiled back, though in his eyes you could tell he knew. “Molly” He croaked. I winced at the sound of his voice, one once so strong, now weak and feeble. “How are you” “I’m gettin there kiddo, how are you?” I tried to keep a smile, though it was hard. He took a deep breath and coughed into his tissue, as red peeked through. “I’m fantastic. Can’t you tell” He managed a small smile and a light chuckle. I giggled a bit at how light he was. “Jeremy told me about the other night with mom” I nodded “How many?” “That’s not important.” “To me it is” He argued as he grabbed my arms. He winced and looked away, pain on his face. “Please, Molly, for me, I need you to eat and stop cutting. I know it’s hard, but you have to keep fighting. I won’t let Mommy lose you and I both within months of eachother. You just got out of the hospital, I don’t want you to go back in” I nodded as a tear slipped down my cheek and rested itself onto Steven’s blanket. “I won’t be here tomorrow” He stated. “No, don’t say that. You’ll be here. You’ll be fine” I pleaded “Molly, face it. It’s time, i’m too tiredto hold on anymore. I can’t” “You can. Steven please!” He looked out his window and watched the snowfall. “Bryan I want you to take care of her, i’ll be watching but there isn’t much you can do when you’re hovering above the clouds. I need you to fill in when Jeremy leaves for the Army. She’s important to the both of us, it’s vital that she stays strong” Bryan nodded. It was just as hard for him as it was for me. Steven and I are only a year and 3 months apart. We’re best friends. I was losing my best friend. The doctor walked in and the look on his face stated that it was time to say my goodbyes and that he was sorry. I turned to Steven and clung to him. “I love you. Know that. You’re my best friend, my little brother, my entire world. Please know that.” I sobbed “I love you, Molly. Hang in there sunshine, one day the rain will stop” He let go of me and I layed in his arms for a few minutes. He stroked my hair like he did my first breakup. “Save your tears kid, I want you to smile and laugh and joke around about the stupid shit you and I did together as kids. I need you to smile” “I can’t smile when it’s all falling apart” “For me, you’ll smile. And everyday I will smile back” That was the last time I saw my brother alive. I layed awake in bed, letting his last words to me echo. I watched the midnight snow fall onto the ledge and shatter to the ground. Drifting to sleep, dreaming. And as I dreamt, i’d hoped that when I woke up, the past year will have all been a dream. I emptied the contents of my stomach into the toilet, feeling a rush of guilt and satisfaction with myself. This was wrong and incredibly pathetic, but I couldn't stop. I couldn't get fat. It wasn't an option. I felt as if along with my vomit came my entire insides. I was used to the pain after the vomitting, but today I felt so weak, and fragile. As I walked back to my bedroom, I passed the little table in the hallway with the picture of Steven, Jeremey and me. I, once again, broke down into hysterics. I'd never missed anyone as much as I missed Steven. It's been two days and I still have not completely grasped my reality. I keep overhearing the conversations between my parents about the funeral, and how my mom will be in the middle of saying something, and break down once more. My heart hurts. I dialed Bryan's number and there was no answer. I really needed to talk to someone. I felt too guilty for purging, not because I promised Steven I wouldn't, but because I knew that i'd been losing more weight, which meant yet another trip to the hospital at the next weigh in. My mom would not only be down one child, but two. I was on a fast track to killing myself but I really just don't care. Just as I was about to take another laxitive or 5, Jeremy walked in. His eyes were bloodshot, and it looked like he had been crying, and hadn't been sleeping for days. "Stop it" He demanded in a weak and almost whispered voice. "Stop it now. You're killing yourself, you're killing me, I lost one of you, I can't-" He stopped and began to cry. My stomach hurt once more, but this was a guilty pain, not a purging pain. "I can't lose you too. You're too important to me" I looked down at my arms, which were fresh with cuts from the night before. I knew I had to stop, but I didn't want to. I felt as if I deserved to be in pain. I deserved to hurt, because I couldn't save my brother. I just, I couldn't save him. I deserved everything I was feeling and then some. I didn't deserve to be happy. As I looked up, Jeremy's eyes held not only sadness but anger. "Talk to me" I reached for his hand, but instead of taking it. He shoved it into the wall. I cringed. "Why?" He ran his hands through his hair, pulling it and scratching throughout his head. "Why did it have to be him? Why does it have to be you?!" His voice was shaken and rising "Why not me? Why does it happen to the two people who least deserve to be in pain?!" "We're all in pain Jeremy" I whispered reaching for his hand again, I grazed it lightly as he pulled away. "But you two just fade away. One of you is gone, and you, you're just getting closer! Why does this happen. TELL ME! IF THERE IS A GOD WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN?! WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU DONE?!" He seemed to be pleading for the answers that I didn't have. I don't know why Steven and I were given the cards we were. Steven chose to play his, granted he lost his game, he played a damn good one. "He was so talented, he really could have been somebody" "In my eyes he was somebody" I interjected "In my eyes he was a hero, and a brave one at that. He had such courage and faced the sickness with a brave face and a light sense of humor. In my eyes he was a gifted piano player, a goofball, and my best friend. In my eyes he was my hero" "Molly, I didn't even get to say goodbye" He whispered "I didn't get to tell him that I thought he was one hell of a kid. I didn't get to tell him that he was amazing and that no matter how I acted when we were younger I always admired his will to live. He lived with a smile, despite how much pain we all knew he was in. Why can't I be like that?" I, again, had no answer for him. He slid down the wall and pounded his head into it. Beating it like a drum. The guilt that laced his eyes in pain, was hurtful to watch. I walked through the kitchen and to the back yard. Tears staining my shirt, I collapsed into the snow. The blood from my cutting staining the white, a powerful red. My mind racing. What was left? I had almost nothing now. Jeremy was leaving in a month, Bryan would be headed off to college and my parents were no doubt getting a divorce. Over the years the things with Steven and I had begun to drive them apart. I would be alone. I found myself looking up into the cloudy night sky, talking, as if I was speaking to an old friend. "I remember when I was six, Jeremy was eight and too busy to play with Steven and me. I threw the biggest fit and broke Jeremy's favorite army toy, and to make ammends for me, Steven gave him his favorite army toy. Steven was always like that. Giving other people his favorite things, because they had lost their own. As we grew up, he would write songs. Amazing and beautiful songs. He wrote me one once. I hum it from time to time, and to this day remember every word. I loved when he sang it to me. It made me feel special" The tears were still falling, and I felt stupid for talking to no one. Funny thing is, I couldn't stop. It was as if I needed to keep talking to stop myself from feeling alone. "Molly says it's never worth it, but she'll never know I think she's perfect. Molly's smile is like the sun, and I love it when she laughs, it always takes me back" I hummed the song to myself as the snow began to fall, coating my hair a bit. It was freezing but I felt nothing. I've been forced into a numbness so real, and so painful, that all I needed was one last reason. One last reasong to end all of my misery. I fell asleep on the porch, and awoke deep within the night. I know there are people worse off than I am, but I wonder if they're dealing with it the way I am. I wonder if i'll ever be able to mend. And mend properly. Publication Date: April 26th 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-cut.my.wings
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-hope-moss-nevaeh/
Hope Moss Nevaeh Tamara fidgets with the ring on her left finger as she waits for her name to be called, "Lord, Lord" she silently prays. "I know I don't pray like I should, but please God could you do me this one favor and not let this be happening to me again please Lord....." A loud shriek breaks through to her subconscious and she feels sticky hands grab her leg. She picks up Tasha her eighteen month old daughter who's face is sticky and covered in tears. She is trying to calm Tasha when her son's walk over to her. Jason Jr. (JJ) is six and Justin is four. "Mommy, Mommy it wasn't me" screams Justin "It was JJ, Mommy him pushed Tasha and make her cry!" JJ punches Justin on his arm causing him to cry," Shut up !! You fucking tattletale!!" "Jason Jr., Watch your mouth boy." Tamara sits there trying to calm her two youngest children, out of the corner of her eye she see's JJ kicking the blocks around that are in the waiting area for the kids. "Shit you think she coulda found a babysitter for them bad ass bebe kids" whispers a woman to her friend on Tamara's left. "Girl that couldn't be my kid, I would be in jail for whipping his ass" the other one sucks her teeth. "Girl these young girls just keep shooting out these......" Tamara does her best to drown out there conversation, "How did my life wind up down this road three kids and I'm only twenty-five years old. This is not how my life was supposed to be. I wanted to go to college...." She has finally calmed Justin and Tasha down. She reaches into Tasha's diaper bag to get some wipes to clean her off. She's sticky from the sucker the nurse had given her, she also has sticky handprints on Tamara's white shirt. "I shoulda known betta than to wear white" she looks at the stain disgusted. "JJ come here." " No, I don't feel like it!' he kicks another block across the floor. "Jason!!!! Stop that right NOW!!" He continues to kick the blocks and one hits one of the ladies sitting in the OB/GYN office. She apologizes to the lady, who rolls her eyes and shakes her head at Tamara. The receptionist looks out into the waiting area. "Ma'am I'm sorry but you're gonna have to make him sit down or we can give you another appointment. Tamara looks at the receptionist, "No he'll be okay,sorry for the trouble." she closes the window. Tamara sits Tasha on the seat, who immediately starts crying. She walks towards JJ. "Boy if you don't stop right now!! I will whip yo lil black ass!!! She reaches out to grab him. He crosses his arms across his chest." And I'ma tell my Daddy!!!" he screams. That stops Tamara in her tracks. "Tamara Thompson" calls the nurse from the doorway. Tamara collects her things and her kids to follow the nurse. As the door is closing she hears one of the woman in the waiting area remark, "God I hope she's not pregnant again" I pray the same thing Tamara says to herself. The nurse gives her a cup to collect a urine sample, After she hands over her sample she is instructed to wait in exam room four for Dr. Richardson. She is given a thin gown and drape and asked to take off her clothing so that the doctor may examine her. Afterwards she sits on the table trembling hoping the Doctor hurries and thinks " They could give you a blanket to go with these paper thin ass gowns" trying to hold the front together. The kids have finally calmed down. Tasha is asleep, Justin is playing his video game and JJ is folding the five dollar bill Tamara had to give him to get him to act right. She shakes her head as she looks at her eldest. "I love him so much but what am I gonna do with him, he has so much anger in him, he acts just like Big Jason" she sighs. Tamara's thoughts are interrupted as Dr. Richardson and her nurse enter the room. Dr.Richardson is a short sista with a page boy hair cut. She stands about five two in heels and looks like she should be in high school instead of practicing medicine. Dr. Richardson wasn't her first choice but Jason refused to let her have a male Dr. When Jason first laid eyes on her, he made a joke about her height and Dr. Richardson put him in his place real quick. She told him " Excuse me Sir, but I don't get down with you like that', hand on her hip. "Your wife is my patient but I can and will bane you from my office. Jason wanted her to change Doctors, but this was the one thing she fought for.Dr. Richardson made her feel comfortable and had delivered all three of her kids. Dr. Richardson opened the chart in her hand and smiles at Tamara, "Well Ms. Tamara girl I see congratulations are in order again" Tamara just stares at her. 'Tamara did you hear me?' she touches Tamara's shoulder, Tamara flinches from her touch and burst into tears. "Come on, come on hurry up please." she glances at the clock 5:55. "Shit Jason would be home any minute and he liked dinner on the table exactly at six sharp.Tamara never could understand it, Sometimes he would not even be home at six but the food had to be on the table. Sometimes she thought about not fixing the meal at the right time, but then she would remember what happened when she didn't. It was in the first year of their marriage. She was nineteen and happy with her married life. Her husband didn't want her to work, He said it was a man's job to provide and even though Tamara had worked since she was sixteen. She caved in to his demands, but they both agreed to talk about it once the baby was old enough for nursery. Jason was great, he gave her everything and he adored his newborn Jason Jr. They had been married eleven months and were still living like newlyweds, oh they had there little arguments but nothing serious until... "Tamara,Tamara," she hears her name through her exhausted state. She opens her eyes at see's her husband standing over her. She smiles and sits up. "Hi baby" she stretches. Jason just stands there, Tamara can tell he's upset about something. Jason is what people call high yellow and whenever he's upset his ears and face get red and the veins in his temple jump. She jumps up "Jason!! Did something happen? Jason what is wrong?" whap Tamara grabs her face and stares at her young husband, shocked and hurt. "Jason?" whap, whap he hits Tamara again and again. She is stunned, he has never hit her before and she wonders, "What have I done?" He grabs her by her hair and throws her on the bed. He pins her hands down at her waist with his knees, he continues to hit her in her face, Tamara can feel the blood in her mouth. Finally he exhausts himself and she cries out. "Jason, What did I do? Jason baby please talk to me!!" she pleads, more concerned about his pain then her own. "Tamara what time is it?" She looks at him confused "What time is it Tamara? He asks calmly. She looks at the clock on the nightstand six she mumbles, he slaps her across the face. "I asked you a fucking question bitch, Speak up" "It's six!" she says louder. "What time is dinner supposed to be on the table" he asks her. "Look at me!!" he snaps. "Six." she cries out. "What time is it now?" Tamara looks at the clock and says "Six-fifteen, she wipes at her left eye which is swollen and starting to tear up. "I work hard all day while you stay home. What did you do all day Tamara? The house is not clean, so I know that's not it. I bet you talked to that dam no good ass LaKresha all day. I keep telling you, you are a married woman now. Time to leave the non-sense alone. All you have to do all day is care for my son, keep this house clean and have dinner on the table at six. Are you too stupid to do those simple things?" seems he's talking more to himself than to her. "My mother told me you were to young and dumb to start a family with" Tamara looks on speechless. She's afraid to utter a word, scared he'll remember she's here and hit her again. She wanted to tell him that his son had a bad earache, she had to sit at the doctors office half the day. Then JJ was cranky cause he was in pain, so it took hours to get him to sleep. She wanted to tell him how overwhelmed she felt, how helpless,She also wanted to tell him she planned on starting dinner, but after getting JJ down she decided to just rest a few minutes but must have dozed off. But all she did was get up and fix her husbands dinner, Yet he called his Mother and decided to eat dinner at her house.... Ding,ding,ding, The microwave had finally stopped and she poured the broccoli into a serving dish, she still had two minutes to spare. It's eight o'clock and Big Jason is still not home, She wrapped his food and fed the boys hours ago. This is another thing she hated about Jason. Sometimes he wouldn't even show up for dinner, sometimes he wouldn't show up for days. She decided to just go to bed. She took her shower and got in bed. She is awakened by Jason roughly shoving his fingers in her dry vagina, she bats at the hand. "Stop" Jason tells her and starts biting on her breast, she wants to make him stop. She just lies there hoping he'll hurry and leave her alone, but Jason bites down harder on her nipple, which are really sensitive because of her pregnancy and she starts to cry. Then she starts moving beneath Jason, knowing if she pretends to like it he'll be a little more gentle. Finally he releases his seed into her and falls asleep. "ohhhh I hate him she whispers to his back" she gets as far on the other side of the bed as she can. "Daddy, Mom said she was gonna whip my ass yesterday" JJ tells his father over breakfast the next morning, Tamara stops scrambling the eggs in the pan waiting for a reaction. Jason looks at his son "Oh she did huh? What did you say Big Man?" "That I was gonna tell my Daddy!!!!" he says proudly. "Daddy, Daddy JJ pushed Tasha and made her cry!!" Jason backhands his youngest son, knocking him out his chair. Tamara wants to run to him but knows that would only make it worse on his son. "Didn't I tell you the snitching is for bitches?" Are you a lil bitch Justin?" Justin is doing his best to stop the tears "No" "No what" "No Sir I ain't no witch" "It's bitch boy" "No Sir I ain't no bitch" not even knowing what he is saying. "Dad" JJ continues, "Yesterday, Jus tattled on me and when I hit him on his arm he ran crying to Mom like a baby" Tamara cut the fire off knowing what was coming. She hears Big Jason take off his belt and she hears Justin openly crying. The tension in the room has started Tasha to cry. "Jason, no, he's only a baby" "That's the fucking problem now, You treat him like a dam girl" he advances on Justin wrapping the belt around his hand. He smacks him across his little legs which instantly welt up, Justin is yellow like his father and bruises show instantly. He continues to beat Justin till Tamara can't take anymore. She grabs the belt in midair. "Stop Jason, you're hurting him." He turns on her, "So, You wanna play miss bad-ass huh-well I have enough for you too!!!! He starts to rain lick after lick to Tamara's body. Her legs , her back, he even hits her in the face. Tamara is on the floor in a ball trying to block the blows, finally he stops. "Son get your things, let me drop you at school" JJ rushes to collect his back pack. Jason stands over Tamara." Don't leave this house today!!! Understand?" Tamara nods her understanding. When Jason and JJ leave the house and the car pulls off little Justin runs to his mother crying, he wraps his arms around her back. Moommmmie you okay? mommiee ppeeease get up? he tries to pull Tamara to her feet. Tamara hears him calling but everytime she tries to stand a sharp pain radiates through her body. "Mommie get up" "Justin sweetie, can you be a big boy for me?" "I am a big boy, look" he flexes his lil muscles for his momma. She tries to smile, but the pain causes her to grimace and she clutches her stomach. She feels a wetness between her legs. "Justin baby, remember how I taught you Auntie Keys number on speed dial?" he nods yes. Key was her best friend since elementary LaKresha McDaniels. Though Jason didn't let her hang with Key they were still close. " Justin I need you to call Aunt Key and tell her to get here fast okay" When LaKresha arrives Tamara is still on the kitchen floor, she see's Tamara and instantly starts to cry "What did that bastard do to you now Tee? I'ma kill him Tee I swear" she says helping Tee up. She see's the blood " Ohh my God Tamara, I have to get help" she pulls out her cell. "Wait Key" "What girl, You bleeding all over the place, What the hell that nigga do to you" "Key I think I'm losing my baby" "What!!! What baby? When? "I found out yesterday" she groans holding her stomach. Key starts dialing" That nigga hit you while your pregnant" Tamara grabs the phone before Key can finish dialing. "Girl what are you doing, that nigga need to be stopped Mara, how you gonna keep letting him hurt you like this" "He hit Justin Key" "What!!!! Has he lost his fucking mind? Justin come her baby" Justin comes in and LaKresha inspects his body, She gets even madder noticing the red angry belt marks all over his little legs. "Daddy hit me Auntie Key" he cries and Key hugs him, she starts crying "I'm sorry Daddy did that to Auntie baby" she comforts him, She looks at Tamara over Justin's head. "We can't call the ambulance yet, We have to call my Mom to come get the kids, so they won't see the bruises on him." "They need to see them, He needs to be put away Mara, What are you waiting on" "He's just trying to toughen Justin up Key that's all, but if you call the police Child Protection will take them. I can't lose my babies. Please Key" she cries "Okay, okay, but we have to get you to the hospital" she says calling Tamara's Mom. When her mother arrives, they call for help, "I still can't believe that nigga hit you while your pregnant' "LaKresha stay out their business" says Tamara's Mom. "What!! This is your daughter and Grandkids, you should be pissed. Did you see Justin's legs?" "He's a boy, Jason is just trying to harden him up, Tamara babies him too much" Key looks at Mrs.Taylor. "He didn't know" Tamara whispers They hear the ambulance and Mrs.. Taylor goes to let them in. "Key he didn't know I was pregnant, that's why he hit me, had he known he wouldna touched me, you know that." "He doesn't have the right to put his hands on you at all Tamara, Dam girl you his wife not a punching bag!" "I know but...." Just then the EMT's came in and started working on Tamara, as they put her in the back of the ambulance, Tamara see's all her neighbor's outside and thinks great Jason is gonna love this. She wishes her Mom would not call him, but she knows she will. Her mother loved Jason. Everything was always Tamara's fault. She often told Tamara how lucky she was to have someone take care of her, stay with her with three kids, pay the bills and support her. She just wished her Mother loved her like that, maybe she'd have the strength to leave then. Later Tamara wakes and her head feels like it's stuffed with cotton. She opens her eyes confused, when she goes to sit up her body protests. "Tamara lie back sweetheart" a light comes on and Jason is gently pushing her against the pillow. "Don't try to get up yet." "Can I have some water or something, my throat is dry." "Let me check with the nurse." He presses the call button and a nurse comes in. "Well welcome back Mrs.Thompson, I will be your Nurse this afternoon. My name is Maxine, but you can call me Max. What can I do for you?" Maxine was an older black woman. Her hair was brushed back in a neat bun at the nape of her neck. "Hi Maxine, she was wondering if she could have some water?" Jason asks playing in her hair. She wanted to bat his hand away. Maxine cuts her eyes at him. This was the part of the job she hated. They had tried to talk Tamara into pressing charges against Jason but she refused, said she fell while cleaning. They all saw the bruises, besides her bestfriend told them what happened. Still Tamara insists she fell, so their hands were tied. They had had to ask the friend to leave when the husband arrived. They got into a big argument and security had to be called. He asked the doctor to keep LaKresha away from Tamara and he took a couple days off to make sure she stayed away. Maxine wanted to cut into him herself, looking so dam concerned when he was the reason this child was in here. "Yes dear, but only a little, Here I'll get you some" she moves to the pitcher. "I'll get it, My wife and I want a little privacy, this is a very painful time" he has the nerve to cry Max is astonished "We just lost our baby." Maxine ignores him and asks Tamara "Is there anything I can do for you?" "No, Nurse Maxine, I'm fine" "Well you call me if you need anything, okay!" Tamara nods her head, Nurse Maxine rolls her eyes at Jason. "Who the fuck does she think she is" Jason picks up the hospital phone and asks for Tamara's doctor to be paged. Tamara had one of the Residents cause Dr. Richardson was not on call this morning. "Jason please stop" He turned cold eyes on Tamara "I still have to deal with you, so you betta shut up" He then proceeds to file a complaint against Nurse Maxine, saying she was rude to him and his wife." If Dr. Richardson was there, he never would have gotten away with that, he also would not have been able to ban Key from Tamara's room. Doc Richardson had never liked Jason and the feeling was mutual, the only reason he let her keep going to see her was that Dr. Richardson had seen some bruises on Tamara one visit. The next time she had requested to see Jason, he only went out of curiosity, Dr. Richardson told him if she ever saw any more bruises on Tamara again, she would personally report Jason to the police. She said she had patients in law enforcements and she would see him put in jail. Jason was terrified of everyone knowing who he really was. Jason had respect at work. He was vice-president of a company that sold hospital supplies. He had worked his way from the bottom and his company frowned on bad publicity.After that Jason made sure to hit her where he didn't leave marks for the outside world to see, or he locked her in the house till the bruising healed. He never hit her while she was pregnant to avoid such incidents. The door opens and an attractive white woman walks in and writes her name and number on the board in Tamara's room, she turns to them, "Hi My name is Kimberly and I will be your Nurse for this evening" she asks if they need anything and when they decline she walks out the room. Jason smiles at his handiwork. "How did my life come to this" she asks again. She was in the top ten percent of her graduating class, had scholarship offers, Tamara met Jason when she was sixteen, he was twenty-two. She actually met him through LaKresha of all people. Jason was a friend of a friend of Key older brother LaTrell who was attending Delgado Community College. Trell was throwing a party for his twentieth birthday he invited his bestfriend Brandon and Brandon invited Jason. When Key and Tamara saw him, they both liked him, yet he only had eyes for Tamara. He even asked Key to introduce them. Jason introduced Tamara to everything. Eating in fine restaurants, alcohol, weed, she had even tried coke with him. Jason was her first and only sexual partner, Yet he beat her senseless when they both contracted a venereal disease from a woman he was sleeping with , he accused Tamara of cheating on him. Her Mother thought Jason was too old for her at first and her older brothers Dwayne and Vernon wanted to whip his ass, yet he charmed them all. He got her brothers jobs with his company and he always came over with a gift for her Mom. Her father had been death five years by the time she met Jason. She gave him her virginity at seventeen, was pregnant by eighteen and a mother by nineteen, just that fast everything happened. No more college, no more future. Jason grabs her wrist twisting, she cried out and he hissed in her ear " What the hell are trying to do, ruin me?" He grabbed a hand full of her hair. At one time she had hair almost down her back, but when Jason got mad he would wound his hands around her hair and pull when she tried to run, so she cut it. "Why didn't you tell me you were pregnant? Are you trying to turn everyone against me? Is that why you made me beat you this morning?" Tamara is openly crying he shows no remorse. "You killed my baby Tamara, I'll never forgive you for that" He pinches the inside of her arm and she screams out." Shut the fuck up!!" "Jason, I just found out yesterday, I was gonna tell you tonight" she cries out. "I don't believe you, you and LaKresha trifling ass planned this didn't you, didn't you" he spat in her face. He pacing the room " I gotta think of something, But at least I was at work when they called for me, and they said you fell right," he looks her way "Right Tamara, You fell when you were cleaning right?" she nods her head. "I told you about doing so much during your pregnancy's didn't I " again she nods.The drugs are starting to take effect, she wishes she could stay asleep forever. Tamara awakes to someone putting sometime on her arm. " Goodmorning, My name is Cintra and I'll be your nurse for this morning" the nurse smiles and takes Tamara's temperature and blood pressure. When the nurse leaves Jason walks over to the bed and kisses Tamara forehead. "Goodmorning Sleepyhead" He smiles at her " Ma you had me so worried, When they called me yesterday I almost freaked, Ma please don't scare me like that again. I don't know what I would do without you" he kisses he tenderly on the lips. ' I have something for you" He pulls something out of his pocket, it's wrap in colorful paper, he hands it to Tamara. "Sorry I didn't have a chance to wrap it properly, I bought you this for our anniversary next month but I decided to give it to you now to show you how much I love you." Tamara's hands shake as she unwraps the package, she cries as she holds it up. It is the most beautiful necklace she has ever seen." "BJ, I love this, thank you so much." "Wait, let me show you something, he takes the heart pendant out her hand and opens it. It is actually a locket and inside is the family portrait they took about six months ago. She starts to cry."Oh Jason it is so beautiful" she leans forward so he can put it on her neck. Jason kisses Tamara, "Ma, I'm sorry for everything, I'm sorry for hurting you. I promise things are gonna be better Ma I promise," he is crying openly. Tamara reaches for him, he stretches out in the bed next to her and they cuddle. "Jason baby it's okay, I love you" "I love you too Tamara, You are everything to me." They both fall asleep, Later Jason helps Tamara wash up before he picks up her mother brings the boys. He even lets Key in the room though he leaves when she arrives. Nobody was gonna keep LaKresha away anyway. "Key look what Jason gave me" She shows Key the locket. "I guess that's what a ass whipping is worth nowadays huh? she looks at the pendant unimpressed. Tamara ducks her head. "Key he does love me you know" "That's not love Tamara" "Key you don't understand" "I understand I'm tired of seeing my bestfriend kicked around." Just then LaKresha's parents walk in the room, Tamara is overjoyed to see them, She spent so much time at their house growing up, they felt like her parents too. "Mama and Papa McDaniels" she cries out excited. "Girl what have you gotten yourself into now" "I'm okay Pop" "Coulda fooled me" "Girl what the hell is wrong with you!!!! letting that no count negro put his hands on you" Mama McDaniels hugs Tamara and scolds her at the same time. "Mary!!!!!" "No George, this is crazy, she needs to leave him before he kills her" Tamara starts to cry. "Mary look at what your doing to the child!!!" Mrs.McDaniels looks at Tamara. "I'm sorry sweetheart, but you're like a daughter to me, and I don't like to see you hurting." she hugs Tamara. Mrs.McDaniels always said what was on her mind. Key had also inherited that trait, that's why she and Jason always bumped heads. "Tamara you know you can always stay with us, you don't have to live like this, just leave." "I can't, he's my husband, this was just an accident. I was just doing too much, too soon." "Girl don't lie to me please" she reprimands Tamara, LaKresha had already told her parents what was going on. She had kept Tamara's secret up till now. Tamara cut her eyes at LaKresha, "I'm sorry Mara..." Her mother looks at her, "Sorry?, Sorry for what? You didn't do anything wrong, neither of you did. That no good ass husband you have is the one wrong. I don't believe he has the nerve to put his hands on you. What does your mother have to say about this? She looks to Tamara for answers. "She said I should stand by my husband. That sometimes things just overwhelm him and I need to be more supportive, She's right Mama McDaniels, I need to try more, Keep the house cleaner and keep the kids quieter when he gets off work." "WHAT? I knew yo Maw was crazy but dam" "MOM!!!!!" "MARY!!" "Yall know I'm telling the truth.Tamara I've been with George thirty five years and we've been through it all, but during that time he has never touched me, though I know at times he may have wanted to." She smiles at her husband. "Baby you're worth more than that, what about your children? What do you think this is teaching them. "He promised things would change, I love him. He said we would work through this, I can't leave and take his kids from him, he needs us and we need him"she cries for understanding. Mama McDaniels gathers Tamara in her arms and shakes her head. She would learn one day she thinks to herself . I just hope she lives long enough. The door opens and Jason,her Mom and the kids come in. Justin immediately tries to jump on his Mother's bed. " Get down boy!!!!" Justin stops in his tracks. "Come here Justin, let PawPaw see how big you've gotten." Justin runs to Mr.McDaniels. The kids love their surrogate grandparents. Big Jason leans down to give Mrs.McDaniels a kiss but she turns her face away. Jason looks at Tamara. Instead she takes little Tasha out of his arms. Tasha immediately goes for Tamara. "No sweetie we don't wanna hurt mama." She tells Tasha softly but cuts her eyes at Big Jason. "JJ baby come here" Tamara urges Lil Jason from his spot at the door. He enters the room with his arms folded. "Hey Baby" Mrs. McDaniels tries to kiss him. "I ain't no baby" he wipes the kiss from his face. "JJ!!!!" Tamara looks embarrassed. "That's okay, I guess he's getting to big for kisses, can Maw Maw McDaniels at least get a hug. JJ looks at his father who nods, then he walks over give his maw maw a hug. The gestures is noticed by everyone with mixed emotions. "Hey Mary" Mrs. Taylor speaks while kisses Tamara on the cheek. "Edna" Mrs. McDaniels sucks her teeth, then gets up and collects her purse. "Well we better be going." "Already?" she doesn't want to be alone with her family right now. "Yes dear, I'm afraid so, When are they gonna discharge you?" she asks kissing Tamara forehead. "Tomorrow if I can hold down food today." "Well I'll visit when you get home." "I'll be there to help Tamara, and she really should rest when she gets home. Only family for a few days you know." States Mrs. Taylor "Family huh??? Who needs enemies." Mrs. McDaniels rolls her eyes at Edna. "Mary" LaKresha and Mr. McDaniels usher her out the room. The next day she is released and her Mother moves in with them. The boys bunk with each other and Enda takes JJ's room. Her Mother is driving her crazy, telling her how to be a better wife and mother. Nothing she ever did was good enough for Edna. If she brought home all A's, Edna would always ask, What man wanted a wife smarter then them, Back then all Tamara wanted was College. Edna would be on her constantly about her weight. Tamara was a size fourteen by the time she reached middle school. She wasn't fat, but she was thick and had nothing but curves, Edna had been a size four her whole life and could not see her daughter being happy as a BIG girl. She put Tamara on diet after diet, they worked for a while, then as soon as she got off them the weight can back. Tamara was toned, she played tennis, ran track and was on the basketball team. Her Mother was just never satisfied with her only daughter. The only time Tamara had ever seen her Mother happy was when she agreed to marry Jason. Three weeks after her release, she couldn't take any more." Mom I think it's time you went home." "But Tamara you need me here." "I'm fine, It's been three weeks, The doctor cleared me, I just can't do any heavy lifting, that's all." "Jason feels better with me here." Tamara decided to change her course "Mom, Jason and I really need to be alone, we can't do that with you here." "But Jas....." "Mom, how can we work on another grandchild, with you in the next room?" Mrs. Taylor smiles, "You're right, I'll talk to Jason tonight,tell him it's time." She spent another week with them. Lately Jason has been nothing but attentive to Tamara. They talk more, he spends time with her and the kids. He has even stopped sleeping out. Tamara is in heaven. This is the Jason she remembered. The loving caring Jason. Months go by. Soon six months have passed.She and Jason are preparing for Tasha's second birthday which is November second. They plan to throw a big party in their yard. They have invited everyone, they even have a spacewalk and clowns, plus a little train that will ride the kids around the block. It is Friday and the party is scheduled for Sunday afternoon. Tamara is making the party favors and wrapping Tasha's gifts. She stops to get dinner on the table. Jason should be home soon,she smiles. Things are still great between them, ever since that day in hospital when he promised her things would be better between them, he has kept his word. Man life couldn't be any greater. "Thank you God!!!" After dinner Jason is in Tasha's room playing with her and the boys. Tamara is in the living room once again stuffing gift bags. She hears Jason come in the room. "Ohh so you decided to stop running from the hard work out here?" she teases whap she feels a sharp pain in her temple and she falls to the floor. Jason is on top of her punching her in the face, after a while Tamara doesn't even feel the licks anymore, nor can she taste the blood sliding down her throat. When he finally finishes pounding on her he stands and tells her to stand up. Tamara stands and he slaps her, she falls on the sofa this time. "Did you think you could hide this from me? Throwing her birth control pills at her. How did he find that she wonders. "Our daughter wanted one of old dolls from the shelf in her closet, a shoe box fell over and look what I found inside!!!!!!!!" he smacks her again, then he grabs her neck and starts to choke her. " I should kill you!!!" He tells her as she is trying to gasp for breath. "Please" she sobs. "What" "Please kill me." He looks at her in disbelief. "You would love that wouldn't you. I kill you then I look like the bad guy. Go in the bathroom and clean yourself up." When she doesn't rise fast enough he slaps her upside her head. "Mommy you okay?" Her screams have sent the children into the living room." Mommy you okay" Justin questions again. "JJ take your brother and sister back to your room." Jason yells. They no better than to argue with their father. "Get up Tamara, Go clean yourself up and cancel this party." He slams the front door behind him. Tamara cries at the sight she faces in the bathroom mirror, Tamara is dark-skinned, like a Hershey chocolate bar. Her father used to call her his Lil Hershey Kiss. Her face is now black and blue, hers eyes are mere slits from the swelling, blood is dripping in one from the cut on her forehead. One of her teeth is loose, and her lip is split. She can't stop the bleeding from the cut on her head, she opens the bathroom cabinet and spots the sleeping pills given to her after her miscarriage. She pulls them down just wanting to end it all. "Mommy, are you okay?Mommy please open the door." she hears Justin at her bathroom door. He rattles the knob. "Mommy please let me in, I'm scared." She goes to the door, "Sweetie you know you to big to be in the bathroom with Mommy," with each word it hurts more. "But I'm scared Mommy" he rattles the door again. "Justin, baby listen to me, You have to get in bed before your dad gets back okay." At first she only hears silence, "Okay Mommy." She hears him run off, then the bedroom door closing. She hurries out the bathroom to lock her bedroom door before he decides to come back. She picks up the phone "Key" she whispers "Mara?, What's wrong, What that nigga done did now? I told you that Mr. Nice Guy shit wasn't gonna last., I don't know why you stay with his trifling ass anyway. You too dam good for him. You need to take your kids and leave." "Key please!!!" "What Mara" she screams at her friend, Key is not really mad at Tamara, but she's tired and wishes her girl would open her eyes. "Key, can you come get us please, I can't take no mo Key. I just wanna die Key. I can't take this.I'm so tired of hurting" she sobs into the phone. "I'm on my way" Once she hangs up with Tamara, she calls her brother. "Who dis" "I know that better not be no ho" she hears in the background. "Shut your ass up" Trell tells whoever he has in his bed. "Who dis? "Trell it's two in the morning, I'm telling you if that's a ho I'm kick both of yall asses" "LaTrell I need you" she cries into the phone. "Key is that you? Key what's wrong."He's already putting on his clothes. "Key talk to me baby" "Who the hell is Key and why the fuck you calling her baby" "Trell tell that hoe shut up for I whip her ass" "Girl shut up, as a matter of fact, get the fuck out!" he is already heading out his front door, he's not used to getting calls like this. He starts his car heading for Key's house and she hasn't told him what was wrong yet. "Trell I'm on my way to Tamara's house, meet me there." 'What's wrong with Ma?" He had always had a crush on Tamar, but she was his sister's friend and too young, by the time she was old enough, she was involved with Jason's punk ass. He never liked Jason from day one. Dude always was too cocky. "I don't know, she called me talking bout killing herself." "What? I'll see you there in a minute." He hangs up the phone and hits the gas. He arrives at Tamara's house in forty-five minutes. He see's LaKresha's car in the driveway. He knocks on the door, no one answers. He hears raised voices coming from the back of the house. He gently knocks on the closed door.From inside the room the hears Key. "Your leaving this time, I can't believe this shit" Key is crying. What The Fuck he wonders. He knocks a little louder then opens the door. It goes totally silent. Tamara and LaKresha both take a deep breath when they see Trell, They both thought it was Jason. LaTrell gets a look at Tamara face. "What the fuck happened to your face?" "Trell, Jason did this shit!!!" Key tells him throwing clothing in a bag. "What!!!!!!! Where his punk ass at? I got something for him, He wanna hit females huh? Where he at Ma?" He's pacing her bedroom too angry to be still "Trell calm down" Key walks over to him and touches his arm, he shakes her loose. Dam Key thinks, I should have called my Mom and Dad. She knew Trell always had a crush on Tamara. She wasn't really thinking when she called she was just scared and not knowing what she was gonna face when she got here, she wanted to have protection. She had always kept the beatings from Trell, cause he didn't play when it came to his people and Tamara was family. They didn't even tell him when Tamara lost the baby because of Jason. "Trell please calm down, just help me get Mara and the kids out of here?" "Where are the kids? "Sleeping, Could you pack them up?" He leaves to do as she asks. Tamara still has not said one word, The cut on her forehead has clotted and dried, her left eye is completely shut. "Tamara, We have to leave okay, you can't stay here, Tamara?" she hugs her friend, her tear mingling with Tamara's Tamara just nods. Key gives a sigh of relief. They pack her and the kids in the car. "Where is my Daddy? Where are we going?" Tamara still isn't talking so Key tells them they are all having a sleep over. They head over to the McDaniels resident because they know Tamar's mother won't be any help. They drop the kids off briefly explaining to their parents what happened. They head to the ER. While Tamara is getting stitches in her forehead, Key fills her brother in on everything. "Why the hell didn't you tell me Key" he yells. "Please Sir, You have to keep it down this is a hospital" Trell just looks at her. He sits back down. "Key you of all people know how I feel about Tamara." "That's exactly why I didn't tell you." "I'ma kill him Key" 'I been wanting to" "But, I'm going to Key, I swear." Key see's tears rolling down her brother's face and thinks "Dam! He must really love my girl." The last time she had seen her brother cry was when they were younger and she fell out a tree and he thought she was dead. She pulls him into her arms. "What do Dwayne and Vernon have to say about this." Key sucks her teeth,"They say that it's Tamara's business, and that she's gonna go back anyway, Punk asses just scared of losing their jobs." "I'ma whip they ass too. I don't believe this shit." Hours later Tamara is released, They head over to the McDaniels house, Mrs. McDaniels sets Tamara up in Key's old bedroom. The kids are in Trell's old room.She leaves Tamara sleeping and joins her family, she is crying and her husband pulls her into his arms. "How could he do that to that baby?" "Mary, she's gonna be okay, We'll be here for her." Tamara sleeps off and on for two days, her mind is still foggy,Key and Trell have been keeping the kids busy. JJ is still asking for his father. Her Mom and Jason were blowing up her phone so she cut it off. She heard Jason and Mr. Mc Daniels arguing one day. She realized this wasn't fair of her to be burdening them with her problems. but she had no where else to go, expect back to Jason. She had called her Mom, to see if she could come back home, her Mom told her "No, I don't know what you did, but you need to fix things." She didn't know why that shocked her. She even asked her brothers if they could stay with one of them. They told her they had families of their own. They didn't have room for her and the kids, besides Jason had been crying to them how much he missed her and wanted her and his kids back. "I'm going back home Key" "What, are you crazy?" "I can't stay here, This is not fair to your Mom and Dad." "They don't mind, This is what families do for each other." "They should not have to deal with this," They had been living with the McDaniels for five months. They had celebrated Tasha's birthday, Thanksgiving, Justin's birthday, in December, Christmas,and JJ's birthday in February. It was time to make a move. She felt stronger know. Jason had actually started going to Anger Management Classes and he wanted to go to marriage counseling. "Key he's changed" "How many times have you heard that?" "It's different this time" "Did you talk to Trell and my parents?" "Not yet, I'll tell them tonight." "Dam Tamara, What this nigga dick made of gold? You want him to kill you? I can't stand around and watch this shit I'm out!" She gets her purse and storms out, passing Trell on his way in. "Key, Where you going? What's wrong?" he grabs her arm "Let me go Trell, I can't stay here and watch this." she pulls free from her brother. "What?" "She's going back Trell, She's going back to that nigga after all he did." "You lying" "Go talk to her yourself." she gets in her car and Trell heads in the house. He goes for the stairs two at a time. Tamara is in her room packing. He storms into the room. "What the hell are you doing?" "I'm going home Trell it's time." she stuffs more clothing into the suitcase. He throws the case against the wall. "You can't go back there." "I have to, I can't stay here." "Move in with me." "Boy you crazy." "I'm serious, I have a three-bedroom house I'm buying in Laplace. Move in with me". The last couple of months, she and Trell had gotten close. He even confessed to having a crush on her when they were younger. 'I can't Trell,come on boy, I'd be cramping your style all the females I've heard about you with." She tries joking her way out of it. Truth be told she had started catching feelings for him too. He was patient, he even encouraged her to go back to school, said he would even help, his garage was doing good. Trell was a mechanic and with the money his parents had gave him when he graduated he had went into partnership with his bestfriend Brandon. Last year he had closed on his first house. She had loved hearing from Key about how well Trell was doing. She had a crush on him growing up, but thought all he ever saw was another kid sister, that's how he treated her and he always had a different girl. If only one of them had said something years ago. "Trell I love you for the thought, I also love you for being here for me." she goes to kiss him on the cheek, he turns his head and their lips touch. She pulls back and touches her lips. He grabs her and kisses her again, The kiss was like nothing she had ever felt. Her body felt like pure liquid. She starts pulling at his clothing. "Where are the kids?" "Out with your parents" "Good" Tamara and Trell make love for the first time. Afterwards they are in each others arms marveling at what they had just shared. "Okay finish packing, when the kids get here we can hit the road." "What?" "You are coming home with me right." "No Trell I'm still going back to Jason." "What, After what just happened?" "Trell my kids need their Dad, I have to at least try." He starts to put on his clothes. "You are not going back to him, That's final!!!!!!!!" "My God, You sound just like him" she starts to throw on her clothing also. He stops, she realizes what she's just said. "Oh my God Trell baby, I didn't mean that, she reaches for him" He avoids her touch and keeps dressing.He then walks out of the room, minutes later she hears the front door slam. "Congratulations Tamara, Your pregnant" she must have heard Dr.Richardson wrong.It was time for her annual Well Woman Exam. They had asked for some urine when she said her last cycle had been in April. It was now July. She had missed a couple of periods,but when she was stressed she became irregular. "What?" "I said...." "I know but how" Dr Richardson starts laughing, "I'm pretty sure you know how after three kids." But Jason and I haven't had sex since I've been home, Then she remembers "Oh my God, I have to go." "Are you okay Tamara?" She assures Dr. Richardson that she is fine, she gets dressed and heads home. When Jason comes home she has packed all her stuff and the kids. She tried to call Trell but got no answer. She was carrying Trell's baby, she knew that for sure. She and Jason had not had sex since she came back home, he was trying to prove to her he had changed. He really seemed to be trying but Tamara's heart was no longer in it. She knew a month after being home she couldn't stay. She knew there was better and she wanted it for her and her kids. Since JJ had been back, he was angry and withdrawn again, The five months at the McDaniel's she had seen a whole different child, A happy child. "What's this?" Jason asks as he walks in the door. "Jason I'm leaving you." He starts laughing "I'm serious, I can't do this anymore." He realizes she's serious "What are you talking about?" he grabs her arm. She pulls it back "I'm not afraid of you anymore. All this time I stayed because I didn't have the courage to want more, but I do Jason, I want more than this" "Go unpack those bags" he pushes her.She just stands there.He slaps her across her face. "Go now!!!!!!!" She slaps him back, He looks stunned for a moment. "Oh so you grew some balls?" He punches her in her face. Tamara jumped on him with all of her strength. She fought him back. Every lick she got, she gave. One hit sent her across the room. Jason Junior came running into the room and attacked his Dad. "Leave my Mommy alone!!!" He beat at his Father's leg "Boy are you crazy?" He backhands his oldest son so hard he hit the living room wall " Now you've turned by son against me?" he advances towards Tamara "I'm going to kill you!" Tamara doesn't even hear him, All her concentration was on her son as he went flying across the room, Now he wasn't moving. "JJ" She screams running to her oldest son. She picks him up, but he's so still, too still. "Jason get help" "I didn't mean..." "Just call for an ambulance, Jason NOW!!!" He goes to touch his son, "Get away from him" she cradles her child crying hysterically "Mommy's sorry baby, Mommy's so sorry" Jason calls 911 and runs to his car. The police and ambulance arrive. They transport JJ to the hospital and puts out a warrant for Jason's arrest. Tamara calls Key who meets her at the hospital, when she arrives her parents are with her. Three hours later Trell arrives, he looks like he's been in a fight himself, his clothing is torn and his knuckles are bloody. The hospital was preparing a bed for JJ he had a broken arm and a concussion. He tried to smile when Trell walked in. "Hey Big Man, How you doing?" JJ started crying "What's wrong Man?" he sits on the end of JJ's bed. "I tried to do like you said, but I couldn't" he cries harder "What Sweetie?" Tamara asks her son. "Uncle Trell said a man always protects the women in his family" he cries and looks at his mom who's crying. She pulls him in for a hug, being careful not to jog his injured arm. "I tried Uncle Trell I tried really hard" Trell is crying also. He looks at Tamara and notices the marks on her face and arms. "I'm proud of you son" he hugs JJ. "You are?" Trell reaches behind him and unhooks the cross on the chain around his neck, He put it around JJ's neck. "My Dad gave this to me when I graduated from High school, cause he said he was so proud of me, now I'm giving it to you. You did good JJ." JJ fingers the gold cross "Really? Mom look?" He shows off to Tamara. "Nice baby" Dr. Richardson walks in the room. "Hey JJ, How are you feeling?" "I'm okay" She talks to JJ for awhile, till he can't hold his lids open anymore. She starts to head out the room and looks at Tamara. "Tamara you really ought to get checked out. Make sure everything is okay with the baby." she walks out the door. Tamara tries not to look at Trell.He gets up from the chair and heads out the room. Tamara runs behind him " Trell wait!!!" "Im out, Tell lil man I'ma check him later." "Please Trell just listen." she grabs his arm. He pulls away "I can't believe you Ma, You got pregnant again for that nigga. I shoulda killed his ass when I found him." "What?" "Nothing" "What did you do Trell? She grabs his arm, He snatches his arm out her grasp. "Ain't this some shit, This nigga got yo son in the hospital Ma, and you still worried about his grimy ass, What the hell wrong with you Tamara. You know what you and that nigga deserve each other. He starts to walk off. "I was worried about my child's father, Trell I was worried about YOU!!. That stops him in his tracks. "What you mean." "Trell I'm almost four months pregnant, I conceived in April, LaTrell, since I've been home, I haven't slept with Jason. This is your baby Trell our baby, I was leaving Jason, That's what the fight was about. I told him I couldn't stay with him. Our bags were packed I was coming to you, I called and left you a message. "I'm sorry Tamara, I really wished I woulda killed that nigga now." He pulls her close and rubs her still flat belly. "So you having my seed huh Ma?" He smiles. "Yeah seems that way." "You know yall coming home with me when JJ get out the hospital right?" "Trell I still have things I wanna do. I've been with Jason since I was sixteen, don't get me wrong." she assures him when he starts to protest. "I wanna be with you, but I wanna learn how to count on myself, That's all I'm saying. "Tamara, I have three rooms at my house, you and Tasha can bunk together,and the boys can have the other room. I just wanna know your safe. That's all." He kisses her."I will even help you with school after the baby is born." She shakes her head, " No, I wanna do that on my own Trell. Maybe it would be better to get out the city till this is over with Jason.' "So, You'll come?" "Yeah, at least till the baby is born" He hugs her and swings her around. 'Trell could you stay please?" They head back to JJ's room. The police caught up with Jason and he was charged with two counts of Aggravated Assault and Injury to a minor. His bail was set at sixty-thousand dollars. Tamara's mother paid six thousand for his bond. This Tamara found out through Key, Tamara had moved in with Trell after JJ was released from the hospital. She was now five months pregnant and gaining weight, she had a healthy glow and her and the kids were doing well. Trell was true to his word. Tamara slept in the room with Tasha, Trell didn't push her about sex at all. He told her when she was ready he would be.Tamara was slowly learning what love was. Trell taught her things, he encouraged her to spent time with Key. He even babysat, when they wanted to take in a movie or lunch. JJ no longer asked about his Daddy. Trell found him a therapist that specialized in kids. The only thing that put a damper on her happiness was her mother. She called to check on her because she still loved her. 'Tamara, Why are you doing this to Jason?" "Mom he broke my son's arm.' "He said that was an accident, Jason Jr. came up on him and he reacted. You know he would never hurt those kids." Tamara had had enough "Look Mom I wanna have a relationship with you, but you have got to accept the fact I'm divorcing him as soon as I can." "I always knew Mary's boy was no good, how could he break up your home like that." "Look Mom I'll call you later I can't talk right now.' "When are you gonna let Jason see his kids, he loves his kids, he wants you to know he's sorry, they suspended him at work Tamara. He needs your support, he supported you all these years and this is how you repay him, I didn't raise you like this. I feel so sorry for him in the house all alone. I've been cooking his meals. You know he has nobody since Mable passed last year. "Mom I really gotta go, Love you bye.' She hung up the phone, why couldn't her mother see. Why couldn't she love me like that. I'm her child not Jason. She sits on the sofa curls up her feet and cry. That's exactly how Trell found her when he came home. He pulls her onto his lap and caresses her hair, It is now almost down her back. Trell said he always liked long hair on her. "I just talked to my Mom." "She still on that bullshit?" he rubs her feet. "Ohh baby that feels good." she sits back "She always does the same thing, plead Jason's case. Why doesn't she want me to be happy?" She cries on Trell's shoulder. He holds her and lets her get it out. "Are you happy ma?" She looks in his eyes "I am very happy" she kisses him. Tamara is now in her eighth month of pregnancy. She has finally moved into the bedroom with Trell. The kids are crazy about LaTrell, he takes his time with them, he even reads to them at night. The have found out the sex of the baby. They are having a girl. "Now the house is even" The boys are excited about their baby sister,even though they said they wanted a brother. The family had just left Tamara's appointment with Dr. Mackey Tamara's new Gyn. That was the hardest for Tamara. She didn't have Dr. Richardson this pregnancy, because they didn't wanna risk running into Jason. But, they were given an excellent referral. Trell parks the car.He comes around to open the door for her. He gets to the front of the car and Tamara hears bop bop Trell goes down. Tamara screams and jumps out the car "Trell? Trell baby" She is pulled up by her hair" So this nigga baby na huh?" Jason smacks Tamara with the butt of the gun, she falls to her knees. "Jason,what are you doing, lets talk about this." "Naw bitch I been trying to talk for months and you wasn't hearing it. he pointed the gun at her. You want that nigger to raise my seeds, let'em raise from the grave." bop bop he shoots Tamara in her stomach and her jaw, He moves around her towards the car, "No " she tries to speak but the blood in her throat is preventing her from talking.She see's Jason stick his gun hand in the car, She hears a series of shots, then her world goes black. Tamara wakes up months later in the hospital. She is told the story by her friend Key.It seems JJ wanted to talk to his Grandma Enda and called her one day from LaTrell's house. Edna gave Jason the number because he said he missed his kids. Jason then goggled Trell's address. It seems he had been watching them for a couple of weeks. He had even been in the house. Jason waited till they came home, Shot Trell twice in the chest, They said had the bullet been an inch to the left Trell would have died instantly. Jason thought he killed Tamara and the baby cause he shot her in the head and stomach, but both survived. Tamara went into premature labor and her baby girl was born weighing three pound five ounces. She had to be put into NICU but she was thriving. They were all waiting on her Mother to name her. The Doctors were baffled as to why Tamara was in a coma. None of her wounds supported that she should be in a coma for months later. Then one day Trell asked to sit beside her bed. He cried and told Tamara how much she was missed and loved. He begged her to come back to him. Trell stayed by bedside and days later Tamara opened her eyes. It was another couple of days before she asked any questions. It was if she wanted to block everything out. After Jason shot Tamara he reached into the back of the car where all three kids were in their seat belts and shot each one in the head at point blank range. He then shot himself and ended his life. Tamara had to be sedated after hearing what went on. She even missed her own kids funeral" God why did you take then, why did you spare me Lord, I should have died with my kids." Tamara went another couple of weeks just going through the motions.No one could get her to go any where near baby Miracle that's what the nurses called her because though she was small and had some health issues she was getting stronger. Trell coaxed her, fussed at her he even begged her, but to no avail. The baby was a real fighter. Within a couple of weeks she was feeding well and gaining weight. They let her out of NICU and everyone was able to admire her through the glass, her grandparents were ecstatic. One day Key asked that the baby be brought into the room.When the baby arrived Key left, the baby started to cry and Tamara ignored her. "You cannot replace what I have lost. You will never replace JJ, Justin, or Tasha. No one wants to say their names, but I will, they were my babies and he took them, why did you live and they die" She says to the bassinet, The baby just continues to cry, Tamara finally goes over to the bassinet and looked at the baby. "Oh God" she gasped "This baby was beautiful, she looks the same as Tasha had when she was born, Same dimples and jet black hair and she had the boys light brown eyes. She crawled into bed with baby Miracle and just cried, she cried for Trell and herself, she cried for her kids who would never meet their sister. When Trell walked in Tamara and the baby were both sleeping peacefully. He went over and kissed Tamara's forehead . "Hey you" she smiled at Trell "I see you've met our daughter" "She snuggled in closer to the baby, I sure have and she is beautiful" "What about giving her a name?" Tamara thinks for a minute "Nevaeh" "Nevaeh?" "Yeah Nevaeh Tasha McDaniels" " I like that. I like that a lot. Nevaeh huh? Yeah Heaven spelled backwards. Publication Date: June 8th 2010 https://www.bookrix.com/-hopemoss
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-me-hell/
me Hell kill me now Neveah's pov Neveah’s Point of view BEEP********* Smack “god I hate that fucken alarm clock!” I shouted pretty pissed if u would ask me. As I looked around for my sister Ella who was dreaming then I heard her say “one direction I love you so much” like a drunken person lol hysterical. “ELLA WAKE UP!” I screamed as she jumped in fright which was funny but she wasn’t laughing, she thought it was kind of mean but oh well I don’t care what anyone thinks. I walked over to my closet to find me something to wear… black or black that’s a tuff decision how about black and purple HELL YEAH. I looked over at my sister and she putting on short shorts and a long shirt pulled back so it looks like her shirts overlap each other WOW what a girly girl. So I hurry up and pull out some black pants, a purple wife beater, and black aeropostale throw them on and head out with my black and green convers and my stewie sweatshirt. Shit I forgot my fucken car keys DAMN IT. “Sis can you please take me to school we woke up to late so I missed the bus” Ella pleaded. God she pulled out the puppy dog eyes till I gave in. “fine but only under to rules” I demanded “1st no gay ass one direction(with stereotypic school girl tone) and no eating in my car we will go to Ihop this morning but we will be late but oh well shit happens.” She loves school so this would torture her ha-ha I’m so mean I know. **30 minutes later I turned on the radio since I saw her in the passenger side of MY car I thought I would be nice “hey Ella you pick the radio station” right as I said that her eyes lit up with excitement. “Really?” she asked I nodded. She turned it to some gay music station but whatever then we heard “the 5th caller win’s 1whole month to live with one direction and can bring 1 family member along to” she screamed and picked up hers’ and my cellphone and dialed and surprise, surprise she won the thing. She has always been lucky and well it makes me happy to see her happy. “sis can we skip today?” she pleaded. “GOSH I thought you would never ask” I said while doing a illegal U turn. “MOM I WON I WON THE ONE DIRECTION SO I GET TO LIVE WITH THEM FOR A WHOLE MONTH!” she screamed as we walked into the house. “you are not going to live with a bunch of boys by yourself” mom said sternly. “I know I get to bring 1 family member, will you go with me” she pleaded to mom. “sorry sweetie I have to go to japan for a month, have Neveah go with you” she said. “hell no!” I screamed from the shower then unxepectaly my sister came in and said “please its only a month please, im not leaving till you say” knowing I wont get outta the shower if somebody is in here “FINE JUST GET THE HELL OUT!” I screamed. She got up and left so I could finish **5 minutes later “when do we leave?” I asked in a bitchy tone “tommoro the guys will be here to pick us up and then we leave for London. “fine but im not staying with you people all damn day” I said pretty pissed. “fine they wont even like a emo person anyway.” It was true I was emo ever since dad died 3months ago I went ballistic and started cutting. it wasnt my fault i cant handle shit like other people. ** the next day I woke up when i heard my sister scream and then a big thud so my instincs kicked in and i grabbed my bat and walked downstairs to see my little sister being carried outside so i took off charging at them screming "PUT HER DOWN" and right as i was gonna swing to hit the person in the back but he turned around and dogged outta the way. i just realised that i knew him "Fuck shit liam im soo sorry im almost killed you with my bat if i knew it was you i would have grabbed a chainsaw" i said in a really bitchy tone."let me guess you knocked,she anwsered,then screamed and passed out, am i right?".The guys just nodded and zayne said "so what do we do with her?" "let me handle her" i walked into the kitchen for a glass of water and came out and splashed the water on her then slamed the glass cup on the sidewalk. she woke up with a scream "faint again and i will drowned you in the bath tub." with that she said "oh shut up emo bitch." and i just walked back in and started to pack.I went to my dresser and grabbed my razor and walked in the bathroom and slit my wrist and watched the crimson red liquid flow and flow untill Liam walked in and slamed the door behind him not noticing i was in here so i just turned on the water washing the blood and hid my wrist's behind my back but i was so worried about the pain i forgot to lock the door. i mentally slapped myself. i made one swift motion and grabbed my razor and shoved it in my pocket thinking liam still didnt notice i was here but of corse he did and pinned me to the ground. he pulled up my sleves and he sat there on me in shock and i manovered off him,took out my razor put it up against my neck and said "tell and it will cost the life of a troubled girl"and with that i started to cry."i wont tell just put it down ok please" liam said with tears in his eyes. -----------------------------------LIAMS POV--------------------------------------------- Neveah's sister scraed me so i waited 1 minute then went up to her room and looked around and saw blood on the ground and thought'emo' damnit did she notice it of cource not she hurried up and cleaned up the blood while i was standing looking at the window. then she came out and i pinned her to the floor while i pulled her sleeve up and saw her cuts. she manovered out from under me and then pulled out her razor and said"tell and it will cost the life of a troubled girl" she said and started to cry."i wont tell just put it down ok please" i said with tears pricking in my eyes."im gonna go downstairs and i wont tell ok?" i said she nodded ** i went down stairs i find the guys and tell niall to go help Ella pack he agreed and i went in the bus.Find some paper and wrote down SOS i cant tell you but just pay attention to Neveah ok? they nodded and asked what did i want to tell them....'you cant tell anyone Liam or she will die'..........so i just say i cant say or someone will die just do what i said and a few minutes passed and neveah,nial,and the she beast came on the bus and neveah sat alone while her sister ella sat buy harry and nial -----------------------------Neveah's pov------------------------------------------------- i finshed packing and went on the bus with ella&niall and i sat alone like my life. i walked into the bathroom and took the screwdriver and put my razor in my mp3(smart right) well after iwas done i went back to my seat and we pulled up to the airport&they had their own private plane.......bratz......... we got threw secrety no problem now to HELL. **4 hrs later we arived in london so now we went to their mansion wow its huge(not sexaull xD). the 1st thing i said was "weres my room." liam said" you will be sharing a room with me or harry." i walked over to liam "touch me and i kill u" i said....he took me to our room and we shared a bed CAN THIS GET ANYWORSE!! omfg i hate Ella. **night time i went into the bathroom and hoped in the shower and 4got my razor SHIT i turned the water off and went to the door peeked out and he wasnt here good,i went over to my suit case and in my book i grabed it and went to turn around but ran into a hard cheast, i was about to fall when he grabed me and i stood up and my towel fell OMG i blushed like hell and grabed my towel and ran into te bathroom,locking the door behind me i hoped in the shower and added 7 deep cuts(not enough to kill me just enough to make me dizzy) i hoped out and got into my pj's and hoped into bed with him looking at me."are you gonna go to bed or just stand there all day?!" i said pretty pissed."commin" i felt the bed lower. **30minutes later he put his arm around my waist and came closer and we fit perfectly ironic right? we snuggled and i fell into a deep sleep ------------------------------------------------Liams pov--------------------------------------- Saving Neveah Text: ? Images: ? Editing: ? Translation: ? All rights reserved. Publication Date: August 31st 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-iloveyou143
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-janelle-johnson-turned-me-into-a-country-girl/
Janelle johnson Turned me into a country Girl Come home to my daddy Turn me into a country girl Cat members: May Mary- daughter of Johnny-father of May Karen- mother of May " hi am I speaking to mmmmm..... Mrs.Mary" May's saids on the phone call with mays mother. " I pro. My maiden name." She says smiling through the phone " that's besides the point mrs. Karen....... May has been acting up quite often I mean on Monday she ditched classes and Tuesday she stated she was sick and.... On her math... Reading rest she made a 12% this can't countuie our school rates will go down." She says speaking very fast . " Ma----'am I do understand your point and I'm trying to fix it she used to be a wonderful child....." Karen was going to countuie Until the teacher interrupted. "The key words she used to be I'm done and she going to have to change or I'm going too... Talk to " Karen was confused and said " her father is not here and if you do want to speak to him you need to contact him not through me." Karen hung up. *may comes home* " mama you got something to man I'm hungry" as i look in the the fridge." No wait we to talk" Karen says motioning her into hr mothers direction. " mama I don't have time for this lets sit down with tea or hot chocolate and I'm trying to work with you but your so annoying." I open the fridge and start dancing."yay ice cream." I get a spoon and take the ice cream bucket. " so mama I was wondering there's a party downtown to night and I invited Zoe over to go with me well go 9:00." I say licking the spoon. " I'm speechless about your behavior and your not going out to night." She says angry closeting the book she was reading before I got there. , " what? Mother I'm 16 in a half." I look at her and put the ice cream down. " you will not I'm done with this convo. You know if your father was here you would not ask him a silly question like this and my answer is final and thought that ice cream away that's not good for you." I looked at me eyes but it didn't work cause I'm white he doesn't have anything to do with color but my rhyme isn't that could lol. It was 9:06 and I was at Zoe's house it was a good night it said on the flyer it was going to be drink partying and pulse ID. " ID you didn't tell me that we can't go know Zoe." I looked at her angry. " actually we can" she pulled out two necklace and... We have VIP rooms." I looked at her with a big smile I was so elated. Be so I m a teenager" we walked in like we own the club we had pencil dresses and we looked our best we had make up on high heels on lipgloss on we had anything u could think of. " we shouldn't do this I mean if I get arrested again or get in any type of trouble I'm going to the ts country where my father lives." I look at she a started laughing. " you know good and well she not going to send u up in the country." There was a fight going on and I was in the middle of it. " I wanted to dance with her first" that's all I heard and then I just see a circle formed. " two guys are fighting over you." Over who i thought i was confused i dient no. What to do i told Zoe to call the taxi so we could go. "Wait ma'---aam " a voice side holding my hand I look back." Hi I'm and officer and I work at the Ohio police station." He said to me. " officer what did I do I mean I went to the club like everyone else." I looked back at Zoe . " look officer whats the problem." She says looking at him seriously. " we'll people our telling me you started this" he stop to turn back a stare at the people who brought it to his attention. " sir, or whatever your name is I'm not a part of thAt." He look at his pad " you ID Ma'am" he counties to look at his pad waiting for the number. I looked at Zoe " I don't have an ID." I say looking at the ground." Then Zoe came up to me pat my back and said " yes you do right here." Then Zoe takes a fake ID card out her little hand purse and said " sorry I think my friend is ditsy from all the attention tonite." Zoe says patting me." Okay y'all stay write there ill go run this." He says tipping his hat. " let's run." Zoe says. " that's like saying let go run off a Clift (she smiled)" I look at her and nod. Before u notice me and Zoe started to bult in typo the wind "where the closes place "I say my house I said out loud. Good thing me and Zoe were good runners because of us being good runners we be came friends fast. *early that moring* " how was last nite sneak out girls" my mother says at me looking at Zoe and I. " what are ou talking about mother we were hear with you." I say coming out my room and Zoe being behind. " don't you dare lie to me again I got a call from the police department they charged me for you running away 180$ that was grocery money that's now what in there pocket ( I tried to say something but she would talk over me or say ahhhh don't speak). Why though May ." She says looking at me with a sad face. " mom mom mom I just want to be free." I say looking at my bottle of water. " you been free enough ... It's time for you to be responsible 16 year old I'm trying to be that mother that can trust you child but you you push it to much get your bags and hit the road to your father I done talk to him and he's sending he "rich plane" for you to get on you be perfectly safe." She says taking the past port out Time to be rich and country I got on the plane it was huge plane I couldn't believe it I wondered where my father got the money from I could swear he wanted to impress my mother but the plane had two names on it my fathers and a lady name the polite tried to explain after he said my new mother I said thanks fro trying to do my daddy's work but he can explain it to be I said with a big smile. I was at my father's so called house did he get a new job did he marry some one rich." Oh Hun you daughters here ." This lady says. " hi my name is .... Tina." She says looking up the long stairs." A lot of stairs ." I said ." You can take the elevator." Wow I was Impress a large pool. 3 bedrooms upstairs 10 down stairs. And a ranch outside with all times of animals oh ya this is the country alright I put my book bag down. " there he is" I look at Tina. He ran to me and I ran to him" daddy" I yelled Tina smiled. " he said your getting big." He says. " so what do you do now." I said looking around , " I work at the ranch " he looks at me with a big smile."your rooms ready ma'am" an old lady said. " thank you May." I look at her. " me?" She laughed. " no that's our mares name." Tina said starting to cook. " made ..." I said quietly to my self. I walked in the room filled with pink." I guess they know I like pink." Then I see cowgirl outfits all over then place and I walked in the bathroom." This is not a bathroom" I said in shock. " I think you have the second biggest bathroom in the house ex. Ours." I looked up. It was Tina. " it look like it time to unpack." I open my suite case. She was watching over me " what this" she picked up my grandma's brush. " oh nun thing" I snatched back. " it has to be something" she snatched right. Out of my left hand. She brushed her hair. At this point I did like her she was my enemy. "No don't?" That's all I have left of her." I said that and it broke.all I could see on my face were tears my mascara drying on my face. " oh I'm so sorry May." I got so angry at this point I wanted to shut the door in her face. " no your not you spoiled monkey ..... You did that cause you don't like that I. Here." I said getting the brush and closing my eyes. " your correct(she says with an evil smile) you ruin my summer of course I had plans for your father and I. " so why'd you argue to let me come." I was interrupted. By my father. " girls everything's alrite." My father opens the crack door. " yes we're just getting to know each other you know girl talk." She says looking back at him. " ya what a talk" I said quietly just enough so she could hear me. " okay foods ready " May yells " so how you like your room May , Tina picked out the color" he says stuffing his mouth with vegetables. " it's pretty so who idea was it t get a ranch I mean you were never the working type dad." I said looking at her but before anyone could answer I throw out." Oh ya I forgot the whole new arrangement." I looked at Tina and took my fork and made motions around her head. And started laughing. " okay that's enough." My father says... " go you your room. "Whatever you say ummmm I don't even know your name cause its not dad because you changed a lot what you changed because of people well I thought you say people not supposed to change us your own words and you can't define them." I say slamming down the frock. " May could you bring up my food to my room." I told the made. " yes " she said back. I looked at Tina and rolled my eyes.… and went to my room. Some one in my pool I woke up the next morning and there was some one in my room was it a stranger or what....." Hello" I said. I walked in my closet nothing I walked in my bathroom. " hey girl. Love this house." It was Zoe. " girl what our you don't here." I said shocked."Your mother talk to mine and your mother talked to your father." I looked at her while she came out my bath with a bathing suite. " let's go down to the pool much bigger then this tub." So we heard to the pool. Told Zoe the hole thing that happen last nite." We'll she not nice at all" Zoe said. I jumped in the pool first and came back up to the top. I had on a light blue bathing suite on and ..."boo" a teen boy said "hey I'm David." David and I got t know each other and we also started dating. " so I guess we're boyfriend and girlfriend." I wrote on my hand. He knew we were and I knew we were. I heard something coming from the ranch. Me and Zoe ducked to see who it was." Look a there she's talking David" I tried to hush Zoe."here's your mine thanks for keeping that annoying brat away from her and her father annoying." She handed him the money up to 690$. " what that price of..." I covered Zoe mouth." Don't... " "let's go back to the ranch I have a surprise for him" We both went to the ranch they had cows,horses,ducks,pig,chicken,puppies... And more. " I called him on his cell and told him to come to the ranch now what our we going to do." I said trying to find a clue. " put some gloves on and but cow poop in his face." Zoe says I look at her with a big smile. David walks around wondering where I am." May where are you this ain't funny now you know I hate animals." He says upset. Before he comes around the corner I give him a little hug then smash the dodo all in his face." What the.... Why'd you do that" he said upset." You jerk you think you could buy my love that its okay to get money from Tina and I thought we were boyfriend and girlfriend I but you name on my hand (I said licking it off) your so sick I'm tried of being a chew toy." I said pushing him in the chicken pen. I told Zoe lets go but it wasn't over yet I had to get back my favorite person in the hole wide world "ya rite". I grab some dodo but it in a basket and some dog drupe. And I mixed it together. " what are you doing." Zoe said." Hush and follow me" so I countuie walking quitely to her room and planted every piece of nasty duple and poop in her bra and he shoes . Revenge is mine sorta " baby girl were going out tonight" my father said. " okay I said and continued to play cards with Zoe. " revenge starts now" we both laughing until we here screaming I run in there room pretending to be worried." You little bum" she said looking at me. "You did this to me." She continues ." No ...I didn't" I looked at my father . "She can't stay here no longer Johnny get her out get her a plane or something out of this house." She said with an evil smile." I can't Tina you know that's my little girl" I looked at my father and smile." Y'all going to have to get along." He says pointing at both of us. " not with hat rat she's trying to destroy us what we build the money,the house, the ranch." She looked at him crazy." I build that Tina don't act like you did and don't go around calling my daughter a rat you horse we should have you out In the ranch." He says. " now pack you stuff and leave." My ather walk out to her clothes and thro it of the gander ." Either pick it up or it goes in the trash" I say looking at Tina and laughing. She shook her head." You ma'am ruined everything your such a rat with your little buddie pale in crime." She ends up going She ends up going home my mother and father ends up getting back together and Zoe mother ends up fhing that its okay to let Zoe stay with us I till college and I was so happy we end up this way oh and Tina ends up with no Jon having to sell drugs for money and at the end of the story she ends up gong to jail I think this was a happy ending dont you Publication Date: December 14th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-jjanelle5
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-lucky-stone-the-humorous-kidnapping/
Lucky Stone The Humorous Kidnapping When 3 girls get kidnapped, strange things will totally happen Chapter 1 "Ugh, I wanna go SHOPPING ALREADY!" Now, that was the voice of Jamie. She was going to the mall with her two best friends, Miriam and Fiona. Miriam was a really pretty girl, with brown straight hair, that goes up to her neck and had tan skin, and blue eyes. She had curves, and a good body. Jamie was a care-free girl, with wavy short black hair and brown highlights. She always wore bright crop-tops, and skinny jeans. Fiona had blonde hair, tanned skin, and blue braces. But she was pretty. Anyways, on their way to the mall, they passed by a sign that says "DO NOT ENTER". "Guys, we better go around this building to get to the mall," says Miriam, already walking around the building nervously. She was afraid of the tiniest things, EVER! Jamie rolls her eyes, and says "Who cares. I don't get whats the point of this sign anyways. There's nothing here." and she begins crossing the sign. "Jamiieee, you bettter not DOOO THAT!" sing songs Fiona, but you can hear the worry in her voice. Jamie runs back, and grabs the two girls' hands, and takes them across the sign. They do seem less stressed when nothing happens. "See? There's nothing to worry ab-" She was cut off by a forceful hand covering her mouth, and Fiona's and Miriam's mouth was covered, too. Chapter 2 "MMMMMMMM MMM MMMM!!!" Jamie tried saying "LET ME GO YOU FREAKY IDIOTS" but they covered her mouth, and held her arms. The man turned her around, and she saw the most hottest guy EVER. He had blueish-greenish eyes, brown hair that was side-swept, and was well built, and had tanned skin. He was hot, but was totally not getting away with this. Fiona and Miriam had hot kidnappers, too. Miriam looked like she wanted to cry, but when she looked at her kidnapper, her eyes had fireworks. Same for Fiona, but she kept a serious face. Jamie's kidnapper grinned an evil little smirk and said "Like what you see?" Jamie shakes her head, and makes a frownie face. She struggles to get out of his grip, but he tightens his grip, pressing his body against her. Jamie feels so AWKWARD, and she tries getting more far away from him, but he won't. He just smiles evily, and they all pick up the girls and carry them to a van. Miriam struggles, but he tightens his grip. Fiona just stays there, but is thinking of a plan. But Jamie won't give up, she kicks the kidnapper in the balls, and he howls in pain and she manages to get free. Fiona and Miriam do the same, and sooner or later they are dropping to the ground howling in pain. "You won't escape!" yells the one with blonde hair, and brown eyes, who had Fiona. Jamie yells "RUN GUYS!" and they run really fast, but are caught by the guys again. Chapter 3 Jamie's POV Gosh, these guys are jerks! Can't they just let it go, and why are they kidnapping us! Sure, the kidnapper's hot, but IDC! I struggle to be free again, but the guy growls and I do the same. They throw us in the back seats of the van, and remove their hands. "AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!" I scream, but he goes right in front of me, and that forces me to look into his eyes. He smiles, but I bite his arm. That did it. "YOU ARE NUTS. CAN'T YOU SHUT UP, AND STOP BITING ME?" He shouts. "I'M NUTS?! YOUR THE ONE KIDNAPPING US FOR NO REASON!" "Well, you guys totally ignored the sign, " he says. I spit in his face, and he covers my mouth, and grabs me to the front of the van. Fiona and Miriam are blindfolded, and we are seperated into different vans, because of me, their words, not mine. He sets me on his lap, and trails kisses up my neck, and down to my collarbone. I slap his face away, but he holds my hands back, and continues. I shiver, cause I've never been this close to a guy. Thank my mom for that. "Somebody's feeling good...." he mumbles and I steam with embarassement. But I get some guts, and knee him in his balls. That makes him howl, and gives me a chance to escape. Pressing the door open, I run out, with the fastest speed ever! I keep running, until I am by a nearby gas station. I breath heavily, and look up. Shockingly, my kidnapper was there. He smirks and says "Surprise." Chapter 4 *If any of you are reading this, I am not continuing this book beacause it's turning out TERRIBLE. I'm starting a new book right now, sorry! :) Hope you like the new one better!* Text: :) Yay! All rights reserved. Publication Date: January 7th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-bookloverlucky.6
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-amber-m-behind-her-schemes/
Amber M. Behind her Schemes she's anything but normal... I dedicate this to you. Y-O-U. :) ANYRAINBOW... I'm giving this book a try. :O It's one of the many books on me only so If it reaches a good amount of hearts I will continue on with it. :) Thanks. Chapter One "You do realize if you take this," She began with her eyes staring at the blue leather heart lock diary that she held tightly by her fragile pale hand,"You and I are official settled." Meaning all those memories in my mind from the first day I saw her classic fancy high heels to the day I saw her aboard the limo leaving for college meant nothing. All those times she caused hell to irrupt in my life I would have to forget it and push it down the dark hallow side of my mind. Even though I had no clue that she was in fact accepted in the same college. Here and now we stand before each other. Negotiating. I eyed the blue leather diary, trying to think of a solution to take it or not. It seemed to be trifling if she had no hesitation at all to hand it over to me. If her so called 'diary' was the real answer my heart craved for then I had to have options. Either do or don't whatever is lingering throughout the thick smooth pages. My mind kept yelling the same things. Do, Do and Do! I sighed in defeat and slowly reached my hand out to grab the diary. My hand touched the blue leather fabric and a sudden urge to back out popped in my head. What could possibly happen? What? Me pulling a few tricks up my sleeve and landing a guy. I looked up to meet serious dark brown eyes and the way her eyebrows furrowed made me shiver. She gently handed me the diary and stepped back a few steps. Curiosity crossed my mind of what lingers in the very diary of an 'old friend'. I unlocked the small lock and slowly opened the diary to reveal what hidden secrets of no other than my enemy back in high school... And this all started yesterday... ~ ~ ~ "Maeve!" A voice called my name for a billionth time. I turned over on my side and pushed my head further into my pillow. A slight annoyed huff left the person's mouth and a hand started shaking me but I groggily slapped it away. Five seconds of peace. Maybe they finally have given up , I thought but frowned when I felt my bed tip. Landing on your face wasn't too fun. For all of you concerned, it hurts like hell. My eyes shot open and I searched my room for the culprit. Finally landing my eyes on a pair of soft aqua blue eyes made me want to jump in joy. Wondering minds. Boy best friend, no. Guess again? Boyfriend, nope. Only one thing left. Brother, yes. My slender hot-headed idiot for a brother had left me two years into high school to go to stinking college. Leaving me with melodramatic parents and annoying neighbors. To top it off all the hell Carissa Johnson put me through. I knew from the first day I saw her classic fancy high heels step out of a limo that she'd be my personal murderer . I shuddered of the thought of it and snapped out of my thoughts to focus on my now smiling idiotically brother. I rushed to my feet and balanced myself out. I wrapped my arms around my brother, hugging him and squeezing hard for pay back for how he woke me up. Has he ever heard of a glass of cold water?! He let out a uh and slight smile appeared on his face. "I know you miss me, Mae but can you ease off a little." He told me. I let him go and smiled at him. He has no idea I'll be leaving him here while I go to college , I thought. "Anything you want to tell me?" He asked as his eyebrows raised. I brought my pointing finger to my chin and tapped repeatedly to make him anxious and impatient. "Well, nah. Umm...Oh! Never mind. Oh I know! Wait...I forgot. Ah, I-" He cut me off with a chuckle. He ruffled my bed hair and made it worse. Thanks. Now it will take an hour to brush my hair. I scowled at him and said,"I'm going to college and leaving you here with our melodramatic parents." His chuckle was long gone and his smile never returned. HA! Serves him right! I smirked as I walked past him to my bedroom door and turned back around. "Oh and the annoying neighbors to. Of course. You can't miss em." I added and then sprinted off down the hall to the staircase. Taking my time like an old woman walking down the stairs and then hopping off into the kitchen where the smell of breakfast made my stomach growl. Blonde hair in a pony tail came into my sight and I smiled. My mother had always debated on which kid would be more like dad, which turned out to be me. The one who enjoys stuffing her face and never cared a fly about wearing Pj's in public. I dared not to ask mum or Jasper about wearing their Pj's in public for once. They would have killed me with their own bare HANDS. Sadly, it's not a joke. "Hi, Hun." My mother said as she sat a plate filled with deliciously hot food on the table. I nearly forgot to answer her from me drooling over the food. "H-Hi." I finally said as I sat down and started to stuff my face. A laugh came from my mother's mouth and I rolled my eyes at her. The usual hyena laugh like Jasper's. It was weird how much they were alike. I thought it was suppose to be the daughter that took after her mother but I guess god wanted something different for a change. A daughter who took after her dad's habits, looks, talents and attitude. While my brother, Jasper took the hyena laugh, the blonde luscious hair, the soft aqua blue eyes, popularity and seriousness. No, don't get me wrong. I'm not complaining. I love my dark brown wavy hair, green eyes, tallness and etc. It's just weird. I snapped out of my thoughts to notice I had finished my breakfast. I stood up and walked to the sink. Laying the plate down in the sink and turning around toward the staircase my mother watched me. I knew she was on the verge to cry her eyes out. Probably mumbling 'Oh! How my baby girl has grown up?' or 'My baby girl is all big and adultive.' Okay.....I made adultive up. So what? She still looked like she was. I rolled my eyes and walked up stairs. I walked down the hall and into my room. Finding my suit cases and laying them on the floor, I started to pack. * * * Some ride that was. I was pushed into a limo, hauled off with some rich strangers and now I was harshly left alone on the side of the road by my college. Nice people, right? I sighed and started to walk along the sidewalk. The place was beautiful. A white fountain stood right in front of it, tennis courts, basketball courts, a football field and etc. Just a question filled my mind at the moment. Why did I even get accepted here? I don't play any sports, I don't do track or cheer leading. I was always the hard working nerd back in high school. A report card of straight A's and full scholar ship for college. Plus this college was obvious for rich snobs. Just saying. Some girls that passed me wearing thin five inched heels while I'm wearing beat down sneakers that was on the verge of falling apart. I never really cared of what first expression of some barbie doll had of me. At least I wasn't fake or trying to steal some guy away from my best friend. They stared me down like they heard what I was thinking and gave me the your-pathetic look as they passed me. I rolled my eyes and walked up to the front entrance. I stared at the white stairs as my eyes made their way up to the revolving doors. A strawberry blond hair girl stood on the very top step that very girl was... Chapter Two "Carissa Johnson?" It came out more like a question. she turned around towards me and stared at me. "Yeah." was all she said. I walked up the stairs to the top one and stood in front of Carissa. She looked clueless of who I was. I chuckled at her fail of realization and took my huge rim glasses out of my bag. I put them on and Carissa's eyes widen a fraction. "Maeve?!" She blurted it out like a question but I ignored it. I nodded and took off the huge rim glasses. "You look," She stared me up to down and then continued,"...Nice." I knew she was lying. "Liar." I crossed my arms and glared at Carissa. "Do you know lying isn't good for your health?" A voice said behind Carissa. Carissa moves a little and smiles. A tall slim guy with curly brown hair, brown eyes and a cute smile walked up to Carissa. He wrapped his arm around her waist and smiled at me, Carissa smiled at him but not a fake smile, a real one. "Who's this beautiful young lady?" He asked Carissa as his eyebrows raised. Carissa smiled nervously and I could tell she was freaking out. "Maeve." I said shooting Carissa a smile that told her it was okay. She seemed to notice and relaxed a bit but she still was on edge. "Maeve. What a beautiful name right, Carissa?" He asked her smiling. "Y-yeah. A very good...name." She stuttered at first and forced a smile. The guy didn't seem to notice because he still smiled at me. "So....Do you guys know each other?" The guy asked. Carissa froze and for the first time I saw a hint of fear in her eyes. "Of course. We use to go to the same high school." I told the guy. It was true. "Really? That's great. A friend of Carissa's is a friend of mine. My name is Darren by the way." He reached out his free hand and I shake it. "Nice meeting you, Maeve. I would hang around but I have football practice." He said. Darren quickly kissed Carissa's cheek and jogged off. I was amused that Carissa was actually with someone and he was a nice someone. After along time of silence Carissa sighed. She raised her hand and ran it through her hair. "Thanks." She said finally. "For what?" I asked. There was no reason she had to thank me. "For not mentioning the whole high school thing." She admitted. I laughed and said,"I'm not that type of person." "I know. do you know where the old park is?" Weird. "Yeah." I said. "Well, be there at 6 o'clock sharp. I owe you." She said and then walked off. Carissa Johnson saying those very words I was unlikely going to hear ever and they just came hitting me in the face. I can't believe she had said it. I owe you echoed through my mind and I groaned. Had she changed just in a few months? or was it my anxiety getting the better of me? I stepped into the revolving doors and pushed forward. It was beautiful outside but I was knocked to my feet on the inside. No, literally some person(A-S-S-H-O-L-E) knocked into me and I fell to the hard marble floor(or at least I think it's marble). I pushed the strand of hair in my face behind my ear and looked up at the person. The equation to this problem was that there was no equation. Meaning the person left without apologizing. I stood up and wiped my clothes off. I continued toward the elevator and stepped inside. I should have mentioned I got my door key and Schedule awhile back. Apparently, I had two roommates and one of them wasn't even human. No, it wasn't batman or spider-man. DARN! I wish it was but instead it has to be a cat named Gelato. I know, right? Who names a cat that?! I pushed my dorm floor and waited for the elevator to close. Just when the elevator's doors were five inches apart a guy slid through. Not to MENTION him colliding into me and causing us to stumbled back. Me, being pushed against the elevator's metal wall and him pushing into me. His messy brownish-black hair tickling my neck. Yeah, his face was smothering my poor(lucky) neck. After a minute of an awkward position he still kept, I lightly fake coughed. "Uh, Sorry." He muttered as he stepped back. My eyes met a pair of blue iris eyes. A blush wanted to creep up my neck but I back slapped it and pushed it back down. Plus It would look absolutely stupid if I blushed by just looking at his eyes. I mean come ON. What kind of girl blushes over that?! Moving on... He broke his eyes from my gaze and turned around. He pushed a floor number and backed to the wall. Resting his foot on the wall and leaning his head on it to, he sighed. I wanted to gawk at his weird appearance. Not to like ruin the moment of his perfectly comfortable position or anything. The poor dude's sweater was inside out, his pants were on backwards, and not to hard to notice but he had lip stick on his neck. I laughed at him. His eyes shifted from the wall to me and his eyes furrowed in confusion. I clamped my hand over my mouth and calmed down a bit. Removing my hand he raised his eyebrows and said,"What?" "Not to like totally ruin your mood," I had a little bit of laughter ready to come out but I continued as I pointed at his clothes,"Your sweater is inside out, pants is on backwards, and you got a little something on your neck." He looked down and groaned. Out of no where he pulled down his pants and I yelped. I turned insistingly and covered my mouth. I could hear him pull his pants back up and then he must have fixed his sweater. A snap(probably from his finger) got my attention but I didn't want to turn around. Well, not just yet. "Hey. Ah...you, Girl." He said. "The names Maeve." I said on instinct and annoyed I had done so. I turned around and dropped my hand to my side. He crossed his arms over his chest and stared at me. "Yeah. Okay, Maeve." He sounded like I was lying about my own name. I wanted to flip him off right there but the elevator stopped to let a blond girl get on. The guy smirked and I could tell by the look on his face he wanted her. I'd puke if it wasn't for a blond chick just waiting to spread the news about some nerdy weirdo puking on her on the first day of college and knowing in about a week my name would be figured out. Ugh! Just watching him makes me want to.....never mind. Back to reality. He flung his arm around her shoulders and she giggled. Scratch that. She made a high pitch noise that probably was suppose to be a giggle. I couldn't help but laugh and wish I hadn't. The blond chick turned toward me and scowled. Oh, no. Here it comes. "Do you have a problem?!" She snapped and I chuckled. "Of course. Uh....Oh! My problem is-" The elevator door opened and I stopped talking. I could tell the blond was already mad but I ignored her. Walking to the door of the elevator I stopped and laughed as I turned toward them. "Well, I would stay but as we all know," I looked at the blond girl to the guy and continued,"You guys obviously really need some privacy. I mean the poor girl's cleavage is almost showing. You might as well be her mother and fix it." I shrugged and stepped out just as the elevator door was closing a loud gasp from the girl left me laughing. No, it wasn't my nervous breakdown getting to me and besides a better word for it would be anxiety. Yes, I enjoyed being mean. Not because I'm some bully or anything like that. I just have an issue with 'people' like her. Jumping out of my thoughts just on time, I dodged the running guy and his fellow companion. Immature Idiots. Sadly, I couldn't complain about it. I'm indeed a immature girl myself and not mention that I'm eighteen. I'd say I'm more of a childish type but still not complaining or anything. I finally stopped at my dorm room, which was 31B and happened to be at the end of the hall. I pushed the key into the key hole and turned until I heard a Click. I pushed the door open and took in the scenery. It was not that bad from were I could see. Plain white walls with pictures or weird paintings made by whom I'd probably couldn't pronounce filled the wall in various different places. If I actually focused on the furniture instead of the weird paintings then I would have noticed the black sofa with a red head, brown eyed girl munching on a bag of chocolate Hershey kisses. Her eyes never left the bag and I was kinda afraid to awaken her from her trance that the Hershey kisses had her in. There's always rules with a psycho girl with a bag of chocolate. 1) If she was psycho, never talk bad about chocolate because she will and I MEAN she will go all nut meets the case. NUTCASE. 2)Never ask for a piece of chocolate because the answer will always be 'No'. 3) If you sneak a piece, she would probably or most likely bite your hand off. I walked in and closed the door behind. The girl still munched on her chocolate as she minded her own business. I sat my suit cases down and looked at her. The girl had freckles, red hair and brown eyes as you already know, she obviously loved chocolate, and she seemed to not give a care about her new dorm roommate. This girl seemed rather okay. On second thought, she seemed way too okay. Wasn't she supposed to be all Oh, I'm too good for you and I rather have a bag of garage as a roommate attitude? Well, it usually was supposed to be that way or maybe it wasn't. A voice with an accent made me jump out of my thoughts,"It's not really nice to stare." I instantly knew the red head had finished her chocolate and was now staring at me. Her green eyes burned through me and I felt uncomfortable. "Uh, yeah." Was all I said. "Exactly." She sang as she moved the empty bag of chocolate on the coffee table and stood up. She grabbed her black coat and pushed her arms into the sleeves. "I'm Annelisa Adams," She started as she slid her vans on and continued,"I got to go out to buy more chocolate and some cat food." I nodded and moved out of the way as she step around me and grabbed the doorknob. "Okay. Oh, I'm Maeve Anderson." I said and she nodded while opening the door. She turned her head towards me and said."Your room is down that hall to the left." I turned my head to look at the hallway and nodded. Annelisa closed the door leaving me alone in our dorm with a her cat. Just Gelato and I. Well, just me since I have no clue where Gelato would be. Chapter Three   I opened my suit case and searched through it. I grabbed a dark red coat and slipped my arms through the sleeves. The coat was giving to me by my grandma for my birthday last year. I buttoned it up and pulled my hair into a pony tail. Using a piece of sticky note paper I wrote a message on it saying: I'll be back. Had something to do. ~Maeve          I placed the paper on the table and walked out the door. I closed it behind and began to walk to the elevator. I pushed the down button and waited. The elevator doors opened and I stepped onto the elevator. The doors began to close and someone slid through just in time to collide into me. Just like last time. Me being pushed against the elevator wall and a guy pushing onto me. Déjà Vu all over again. I noticed something though. The guy's hair was the same as last time. "Seriously?!" I blurted. The guy stepped back and scowled. "You," He started as he pointed at me and continued,"You're that girl from last time." I rolled my eyes and huffed. "No, I'm a rainbow dancing unicorn," I sarcastically said and sighed as I continued,"Yes, you idiot." His scowl deepened and he shoved his hands into his pants pockets.  "Ah, you attend to be on the elevator every time I am. Stalker much?" He said. "It's not like I choose to be. Why would I be stalking you? I would rather stalk the old lady in the check out office because her life seems way more legit than yours." I crossed my arms and pushed the lobby floor button.  "Push three." He told me.  I pushed three and stepped back. The elevator was silent until it stopped on the floor three. The guy walked off the elevator and out of my sight. The elevators doors closed and I sighed.    It's going to be a long night , I thought.   * * * BACK TO PRESENT I opened the diary slowly and turned to the first page.  I read,"If you're going to be black, you have to be black all the way." "Black?" I asked Carissa. "Dirty. If you're going to play dirty, you got to be dirty all the way." She said as she crossed her arms over her chest. "Oh." I muttered. "There's a party Friday night." Carissa moved her finger to her chin and tapped. "What does that have to do with anything?" I asked, leaning on my left leg. "Guys will be there. Plus on the bright side you get to where a dress, but I might have to help you with that." She told me as she looked me from up to down in disgust.  "Offensive. I have feelings, y'know right?"  I wanted to say to her but stopped myself from doing so. I crossed my arms over my chest and sighed. "I don't think I would like your  style. " I looked at Carissa's outfit. She was wearing pink skinny jeans, a white shirt, and heels.  "What's wrong with my clothes?" Carissa snapped at me. I pointed to her pink skinny jeans and heels. "I hate pink and I don't wear heels." I answered, honestly.  "Floral pattern?" Carissa asked. "Never." I answered. "Denim shorts?" "Nope."  "Skirts?"  "I would rather die than wear 'em." "Dresses? I mean, I seen you wear them before, so you got to like dresses." Carissa raised her eye brows and stared at me. "My mother foreced me." I responded.  "Such a liar." Carissa muttered. "Am not." I snapped. "Are." She said. "Are not."  "Are" "NOT!" "ARE!"  "Are." I said. "Not." Carissa said and I laughed at her.  "Ha! I got you to agree with me." I chuckled and stuck my tongue out at her.  I got an eye roll and huff as a response.  After a few minutes of silence and shivers from the cold, Carissa spoke. "How about we go shopping?" Carissa suggested. "That depends." I told her. "On what?" She asked as she shoved her hands into her pockets. "I get to pick what I like." I said. Carissa nodded and took out her phone. She stared down at the screen and handed it to me. "Put your number into my phone, so I can text you." Carissa told me. I nodded and put in my number and gave Carissa her phone back. She added a few more things and then shoved her phone back into her pocket.  "I'll see you tomorrow then." I muttered. "Yeah, see you tomorrow." She said as she turned around and began to walk away.       I spun on my heel and began to walk back to the my dorm. Thinking about it, I'd said I would walk in to find Annelisa eating chocolate and watching Television. The girl was simple and I give her credit for it. Still though, I don't understand why she called her cat Gelato. I'm going to have to make a mental note to ask her later. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ I'm sorry for the short chapter. I will make Chapter four longer.  How is it so far? Why did Annelisa call her cat 'Gelato'? Heh. Heh.  I'm probably going to make a cast because I already have some I can use for this.  Heart.   Comment. Like. Share. Have a party. Suggest stuff to me. Do anything you want. Just don't copy or....yeah. Thanks for reading.   Text: copyright Amber M. Images: favim.com ;) All rights reserved. Publication Date: February 27th 2013 https://www.bookrix.com/-angelcake72
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-emily-stark-sims-2-love-story/
emily stark sims 2 love story love forever thing happen starring :: ::::::: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :::::: ::::::: :::::: mai jessica charlie dane rocky luke............................................................ mai:shes a goth who seacreatly has a crush on luke. but every night she turns into something you dont wanna know she kept this seacret for more then 5 years dose any off her freinds know ? ............................................................ luke:he"s the most popurler guy in high school he also the captin of the football team .he has so many crushes but mai"s one is one of the biggest seacrets ever known but he not avilble he has a cheerleader girlfreind called molly. ............................................................ jessica:smart cute the best thing anyone could have she one of the top cheetleaders shes also a drama queen but fun to hang with she deeply in love with charlie . .......................................................... charlie:shy but nice he asboulty know that jessica has a crush on him and he has a crush back but to shy to ask her out but has an idei to do a song for the prom but this songs only for her will this turn out right .......................................................... rocky:a musican for the school she awsome singer with a big seacret of being a celeb to also best bff with mai jessica also with the boys ...................................................... dane:the most hot smoking guy with a six pack hopeing to find the right girl to date he awsome and loves to party chapter 1 am just a lonely girl who has a seacret to my self i wish i wasent like this my life is worse my parents dont care about me at all my sister cece she has every thing you could get also with a famouse celeb boyfreind called jason derulo the story begins every body is in there bed till midnight struck and mai was awake a tranformation was happing in front of someones eyes jessica . jessica woke up in a shock but ... mai snuck behind and shocked her with a vampire bite jessica said"no whats happing"" mai said "dont tell anyone or stay like this""jessica promised but the seacreat wasnent for long soon she told everyone mai wasent happy so she went to get some potion to cure the vampirenes but it was hard the only time it would work when she turns into a vampire but by that time people would be wachting but thing got serious this story was on the tv what could she do ....................... only 2 days till prom but still has this problem gone ?well since proms nearly here charlies been working on his song but cant get things right so he decides to do it the easy way by asking jessica but he decide to do it romantic way by taking her on a picnic in the park on there own. suddenly jessica came in and charlie went in and ask her out with a beutifull rose in his hand begging for a yes and it came true he was so happy he couldnt hold it in a day passed by and the prom was today every one was so exited things were happing so fast all the girl were gossiping about there dates there were having make overs it was like they were being princesses. time past and it was 6:00 o,clock there dates compelerment them with words and showed them a beutifull limo prom night everyone was ready to hit the road to the prom . when they arriviad everyone was dress all in beutifull dresses and hot looking in there suits looking very posh and they were having the timee of there life but the sun went down and the moon came up and mai turned into a vampire then everyone burst into fear and scatterd all over the place wich made the prom go very quite....... mai was left alone then she licked her lips with hunger but she was strong anoth to stop it , luke went over to mai and said "will you go out with me" mai turned back to a human being with exitment she awrserd with a yes but in a secrectly tiny whisper ,luke gave her a gentle kiss on the cheek and thought that they should go and see the moon .... mai and luke left the prom ,but there was a person watching them who was getting paid to do it ... everyone back in prom everyone saw they went and got back in ready to party but for charlie that wasent the ony thing on his mind ,charlie heart was pumping with fear before he ask out jessica what will happen ....... Publication Date: December 5th 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-emstark2001
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-daniella-love-kiera/
daniella love Kiera to my friends Keeping Secrets it was 6:30am i woke up when i heard my doorbell ring i open the door to found my sister holding a baby carry inside was my 7 days old nephew emily i ran to the bathroom right to the toilet and started throwing up cole set emily down and walked in the bathroom she asked me this question are you pregnant i answered no but today i was going to buy one to check if i was how am i going to tell austin i told cole.cole was now breastfeeding emily and i imagineing me holding my baby. cole was staying at my place for two weeks before she go's on her vacation with emily and she wanted me to send some time with her baby until they go.i quickly drove to the store to buy a pregnancy test i went back home to use the bathroom the test said pregnant i stopped breathing cole was shock for a few minutes it felt like the whole world has frozen cole asked me how many monthes or week one mo remember that i was one and a half pregnant i said . i went to bed early today. when i woke up it wanths 10:59 am i was later for school quickly i got up ran to the bathroom kneel down to the toilet to throw up when i was done i flush the toilet then spayed the bathroom i turn on the shower got in and took a bath i got down and dress in sweatshirt to hide my bump and sweatpants to hide the weight i gain when i got in my ford mondeo and drove to school when i reach school i park near the school . got down and pushed the school door to open when i was walking down the hall to my locker someone asked me this question i couldn't answer when i saw austint walk i ran to him to tell about the news when i saw austin kissing another girl i walked up to him .are you cheating on me i said.i never knew that he would do this i felt like my heart had stopped.i felt like i was going to throw up i ran to the girl bathroom.when iwas down thowing up i met austin right in front of the door are you sick he said no but i am pregnant austin look like lightning had shocked him what do you mean your pregnant we didn't have sex like in two monthes he said i'm one month and a half pregnant i said and today i was going for my appointment i heard the bell ring and i walk to class.alex my best friend said are you pregnant because i keep on hearing that your you know pregnant i knew that i couldn't keep a secret from her yes i said i am one month pregnant alex was so happy that she was about to brust so does austin know he know alright i said but he said he is not the father  so i have to get a job to take care of my baby school was finally over and i got in my car to got to my doctor's appointment when i got there i parked my car and walked to the front desk to sign my name i waited for 56 minutes until the doctor called my name i got up and pulled up half my stirt and the doctor put some gel on my belly  to find my baby the doctor said i was having twins i was so happy i felt like i was going to be a mother of two and in high school when i went to my apartment and call my mom it has been almost four monthes since i have talked to her i told my mom that i was pregnant it sounded that my mom was mad on the phone mom please don't get mad. my mom was coming over for 8 mothes. the door bell ringed i saw my mom staying crying and about to take my mom i told my mom how it happen and i am going to have twins she sat on the sofa who is responsible for this i told my mom austin her eyes were red.why kiera why you are way too young for this said my mom.next week i was going to be two monthes pregnant.   showing  i woke up to find my legs missing i got up to see how cole and emily were doing when i went to the kitchen i found a note said gone to the gym feed emily i got some white milk pu some sugar in it i started wraming it when my mom came in the living room.what are you doing said my mom wraming milk for emily my mom wanted to taste the milk before i gave it to emily first my mom thought it was good until i told her that i put white milk with sugar my mom looked like she was coking i put her on the sofa she got a little better that is no way to give a baby food said my mom she told me to put some beast milk i lucky for me cole already pumped some so i got the leftovers and poured some in a bottle i wramed it and gave it to emily right after emily was done eating cole came my mom likes to gossip she told about what i did with the milk cole looked at me i felt like i could never be trusted again.when cole went to her room you bitch your a fucking loser i told my mom .she looked at me like what the heck.i got to my room took of my clothes untill i just had my bra on i bought headphones on my belly so my twins can listening to music when the whole music was done i got up i was really starting to have really bad cramps i started to doze off when i woke  up to look at the clock i started to get up when my pants were covered in blood i sceamed for help cole and my mom came running to the room.my mom drove me to the hospital we wait until the doctor called my name i have an ultrasound the dotor said i was the baby was ok but i just had to be careful when we reached home i checked to see if i had missed calls.austin called me 18 times and i didn't answer.i called back hey you called why i said will i just wanted to check on you and your mother called me and told me that you were bleeding or the kids ok said austin the babies are fine and you and me have to buy clothes for your son and daughter and help me do the nursery because there is about 7 more monthes till my babies get here and i want it to get it done.it was really late like about 4:00 pm in the midnight of night my mom however was watching tv and cole was feeding emily.i went to the living saton my sofa it was a few mintues until i started dozening off to sleep.ding dong i heard the door bell ring austin was starting right in front of my door with some stuff i helped him with it when my mom saw austin she wasn't happy about it we were working on the nusery while austin was working i went upstairs to take a bath when i came downstairs it was beautiful it felt like i was in love again i thank austin than he went home "cole mom come down here i was really exited to show my mom when she come downstairs  Publication Date: May 2nd 2014 https://www.bookrix.com/-zd8d363ebb0e235
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-rimsha-sohail-too-bad/
Rimsha Sohail Too Bad Prologue: "Yeah Yeah"said Claire to her dad. She was soooo bored of getting a lecture from her father all the time. Just because she said a few bad words, her father gives her hell for it. "Now listen to me young lady, you need to be responsible for your choice of words. If you carry on like this-" "Yeah dad. I get it can i go now?" said Claire with attitude. "No you can't" said her dad. "Just because you want me to listen to you, i won't david!! I don't wanna be like you or your poxy little girlfriend!!!" Shouted Claire in a fit of rage. Suddenly, she wished she hadn't said that. Her father's face had turned into a crimson red, from a beige colour. She leapt back, scared of her father for the first time. She knew that her father didn't like her calling his girlfriend names, because she was a handi. Suddenly, she was twitching on the ground, begging her dad to take mercy for her......... Regret: Claire was an average sized girl, with blonde hair and hazel blue eyes. She occasionally wore some make up, to give her face that little glow. Her face was pale under the moonlight, but if you had the right luminous light, then her face would look better. In this state, she would look like a person who had gotten beaten up by some bouncer, and cried over it. That was how it felt like to Claire. She was already a weak girl, and her father had made her even more flaccid. Later on that night, Claire was weeping her eyes out. She was so terrified of her father. He had hit her!!! HIT HER!!! She just couldn't believe it. Just because of his girlfriend, she got punished. The problem was that David's girlfriend, Amy was a beautiful woman. Literally. She was so pretty, the first time her saw her, he was put under a spell. Eventually, she started liking him, as he did. One day, she moved in with her father and herself, and took over the complete house. Ever since that day, her life had been a misery. Then one day, Claire's father and Amy had met up with an accident, and it had all been her father fault. Amy's face got ruined and ended up in a wheel chair. Her father had never forgiven himself, from that and had warned Claire to speak of anything bad about her again. Claire stiffened a yawn, and instantly became aware of the bruising on her face, head and rest of her body. Claire felt a warm patch of wet, near her face. She reached for her mirror and gazed at her reflection in horror. Blood covered all of her chin and mouth. She wiped off the blood, with her sleeve, and dried her hands. She remembered those 5 painfull minutes of torture. She remembered that her father had picked off his shoe to slap and hit her. Later, when he was content of using the rock hard shoe, he put back on his shoe and began kicking her. That was the worst of all, from the unbearable torment. Unexpectedly, her eyes drifted to a close and she was floating, under sleep. Morning: Claire awoke at the sound of a pound at the door. She sat dazed, startled at the knock at her door, wondering who would knock so early in the morning. She peeked to her right, staring at the alarm clock. It was 6.00 am. She didn't wake up for school until seven. Suddenly she recalled the episode of last night. She had got beaten badly by her dad. "Can I come in please, Claire?"asked her father. NO NO NO!!! Claire thought in her mind. He probably wanted a scar to last on her body, if he wanted to come in. Wasn't he sorry for her, getting beaten up by her dad, on the floor, defenceless? If he had some shame or regret, he wouldn't face her in the face. He had the guts to actually knock at the door, wanting to come in. The door creaked open. Claire shut her eyes, pretending to sleep. She started breathing heavily, wanting to put on a good show. "I know your awake Claire. You don't need to pretend to sleep." Whispered her father. She sat up, disappointed of her actress skills. "Yeah I'm awake. You caught me". She tried to sound surprised, but her voice sounded the inside of a grave. "I-I I'm so sorry Claire. I was out of order last night. When you spoke of my dear Amy like that, I just lost control.Now you know what the consequences are to answer back and be rude to me", explained her father. "Do you think its ok to batter your daughter, black and blue? Have you even looked at the state of my body?"Asked Claire, furious. "No I haven't Claire, why is it something to look at? I hope you have not blabbed to anyone about last night. If you do, you will wish you hadn't!" Screamed her father. She was so angry with her father, because he tells her what to do AND abuses her. It was so unfair. "No dad, i haven't told anyone about the atrocities you do to me. You're safe for now." Whispered Claire. "What do you mean safe for now?" Said Claire's father. " I mean that you're safe forever, OK dad?" replied Claire. "Yes, yes good. Now, you better get ready for school, otherwise you'll have to walk the whole way, without any school bus." Came a sudden voice. It was David, Claire's father, walked out of the room with a loud bang from the door. As soon as David was out of the room, Claire leaped up from the bed, and searched for her uniform. She peered over her shoulder and say that the time was nearly 7.00 am. Her father had took a whole hour for this stupid lecture. She put on her clothes, and reached for her bag of Toiletries. She was all ready for school, so she left her bedroom. Claire thought that her father would waste more time, over breakfast and she'd have to bare that. With a rumbling stomach, she shut the door, and sighed into the brightness of the sun. The Bus Station: When Claire stepped out of the front door, she was thinking again of the abuse that occurred last night. She knew that when her father started something, he never stopped doing it, unless it made him feel stupid. She knew what her father would say, if she asked him if he was going to do it again. He'd say something like this: "I'm sorry poppet, for what I did to you. It was just a one off, and it will NEVER happen again. I can understand the pain you went through, but it was the only way for you to see sense. I feel invincible, controlled when I hit you, that's why you need to learn your place." Says her father, probably. She realised that while she was thinking of her fathers explanation, the bus had come to the bus station, and waiting for her arrival. The bus driver Mark, who was short, and bald, with tattoos and piercings all over his face was waiting for her, like everyday. "Good morning Claire. How are you today?" asked Mark. Was she meant to tell the truth, that happed to her, or should she lie for her father's sake? She decided to lie, because if she went home after school, her father would find out about it and beat her more. "Er, I-I'm fine thanks Mark. I had a great night last night. What about you?" I'm great Claire, I went over to see my ma over in London. You know, you should see the Big Ben, its a great site, with lots of attract"-- His face was creased in pain and misunderstanding. "What happened to your face Claire?" His voice was raised in anxiety and worry. You could tell by his expression that he was shocked. Mark had never seen Claire so badly hit, ever in his life! He'd seen a few cuts and bruises on Claire, after falling over, but never had seen her with great purple bruises along the left side of her face. "Err... I .... eeer...... oh yeah, i got battered up by er..... by some girl. I was calling her names and she flipped and got her friends on me and she threatned never to do it aga---" she was just about to finish her made up story when Mark cut in. "I'm sorry Claire, but I'm not convinced that a girl did that to you. Also, I know that David has got anger management. I'm not accusing him of anything, but tell me Claire, did he do this to you?" Claire could already see the fire starting to burn in his eyes. Mark, who was a bus driver, he was extremely protective of Claire. He thought her as her daughter. Suddenly, she vaguley remembered the hostile look in her dad's eyes, after he told her not to tell anyone of the "preformance" that happened the previous night before. She had to speak now, otherwise she never would. She squared her shoulders, and she knew it that she was determined to give her father the punishment he deserved. " Ahhh, well, the thing is that. . . yeah, I did get beaten up by my dad. He flipped out in a fit of rage, and that's where it lost control. He can be sometimes a bit brutal, but otherw--" she was about to speak out to tell the whole bit, when suddenly a horn sounded behind her, stopping her blurting out the truth. She recognised that sound. It was her father's car. Publication Date: May 21st 2010 https://www.bookrix.com/-rimsha.786
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-kawanda-gaylee-curves/
Kawanda Gaylee Curves Part 1 Chapter 1 Naomi   The club was live and me and my girl Destiny was having a good time. Well that wasn't true, I wasn't having a good time. I was actually ready to go home. All I wanted to do was lay in my bed, watch t.v, and eat some damn ice cream.    "Girl, it's some fine ass playas in hea tonight" Destiny said dancing to Y.G. Bounce It. "Gettin' dick tonight!"    That was code for she was going to get hit on by the fine ones... While their ugly sidekicks tried to get at me. That's one thing I hate about coming out with Destiny. She was a size 5 and me a size 16. I had big hips and a huge ass. I wasn't all skinny like her. Don't get me wrong I was far from ugly, but from what most dudes say, I didn't have the body to go with my looks. I was plus size... Destiny was no size.    "Look at that one" Destiny said pointing at a light skin man. He was a looker too. Tall, dreads, sexy hazel brown eyes, and a killer smile. And he was looking at her. Figures.    "He lookin' at you girl" Destiny said checking her teeth in her compact mirror.   "No he's not. You know damn well he looking at you" I said shaking my head as she started walking his way.    "You're right, he is" She said over her shoulder. I watched as she flirted with him. And as I thought, he whispered in her ear. I sighed and turned back around at the bar.    "Patron" I said to the bartender. He gave me a dimpled smile and fixed my drink.    "Why the bored look? I don't like when people not having a good time" He said handing me my drink.    "No reason, just ready to go" I said taking a sip. He look like Channing Tatum with black hair and green eyes. He was fine. To fine to be damn bartender.... More like a male stripper because just starting at him made me wet.    "Like what you see?" He asked with a crooked grin.    "Oh... Um sorry" I said blushing drinking my drink whole. I can't believe I was acting like a hoochie.    "No need to be sorry. I like being checked out by beautiful women" He said with a wink before going to assist another customer. If I could get a man that look like that no one would be able to tell me nothing.    "Hey I'm leavin', you comin'?" Destiny said from behind me. I turned around to see sexy dread head kissing the back of her neck. I didn't want to be a third wheel while they fuck.    "She has a ride" The bartender said with his crooked smile. Destiny gave me a look of disbelief, like I couldn't pull a fine man.   "Oh okay" She said walking away with her man of the night.    "I see girls like her every night" He said shaking his head.    "What's your name?" I said looking in my glass that only had ice in it.    "Boss" He said with a wink taking my glass and filling it up again.    "Really? Boss?" I laughed. He sat the drink front of me and gave me a smile.    "Yes, Boss" He said before turning to tend to someone else. The man called himself Boss.. Now that was some sexy ass shit.    "Hello sexy" A drunk man said sitting next to me. He wasn't ugly, just drunk, which made him unattractive. I turned the other way not bothering to speak back.    "What you think you better than me? " He asked loudly making everyone at the bar stare at us.   "Yo chill. Relax she just showing the sign that she's already taken. No need to cause a scene." Bartender guy spoke up for me. Even if it was a lie.    "Is he here? No, so let's have fun" Drunk bastared said. I was beginning to become sick. Why did I come to the club with Destiny again? Oh yeah! To help her get a sex toy for the night.    "My man is here thank you very much. And he's a very jealous guy. I mean kill a nigga type of jealous. At this moment he's being calm because he's working, but I'm pretty sure if he wasn't you'd be dead and he'd have to get lawyer." I said smiling over at bartender guy like I was in love.    "Whatever" Drunk guy said leaving the bar.    "How did you know I was the jealous type?" Bartender guy asked with a crooked smile and a wink. "I'll be off in 5"    I was soaking. Yup.... I was wet.... With just a look he had me having mini orgasms.    True to his word 5 minutes later he was off. He look even better from behind the bar. Standing tall and sexy.    "It's only 1, Ready to go or party with a real man?" He asked pulling me up from my seat. Strong. Me likey.    "Party with a real man." I flirted back. This was one night for me to flirt with a man I knew wanted me back. How I knew this? Well let's see... His dick was hard. And very much noticeable.    "Then come on" He said going up the stares to V.I.P. Since he worked here he had to have easy access to things like this. And when we got there my jaw dripped.    It look better then the rest of the club. The club was high maintenance and all, but this was like Bill Gates type of shit, even though I don't know how Bill Gates party. But I'm pretty sure it's like this. Money was everywhere as men threw hundreds at the dancers on the table. Every fucking thing was crystal with white leather seats.    "Welcome to Paradise" He smirked. This was the room for the real die hard ass ballers. You know them millionaire gangsters? That's all I seen. The music in here was different too. And they had more expensive drinks also. This was white girl heaven!    "Yo Boss, Who this?" A sexy chocolate man asked from his seat at the bar, which we weren't that far from.    "This is.."   "Oh, Naomi" I said quickly. Both men looked me up and down and repeated my name. And from there I was having the time of my life.    Everyone in the room seemed to be cool with Boss. They all treated him like he was a Mafia dude. You know, he snap his fingers and people outta nowhere pop up with food and liquor? That's the shit that happened.    I was wasted and I knew it, but I couldn't stop drinking. I was to turnt. I was dancing on the tables with the strippers and giving Boss lap dance after lap dance. I was doing the total opposite of what I would have been doing if I was sobber.    By the time 4 hit, me and Boss was heading out with him holding my heels and me with a bottle of liquor. I really didn't know what it was, but I was drinking it.    "I think you've had enough to drink" He said trying to take my drink away when he stopped at a red light.    "Nooo. Nooo. Nooo." I slured. "Leave him alone." hiccup. "He has been so friendly tonight" giggle.    "C'mon Naomi, give it here"He said holding his hand out.    "Keep your hand on the wheel" I said slaping his hand away.    He asked me where I lived and I couldn't remember...    "Ummm in some apartments. They ah ah I don't know I just drive there I don't look at signs!"    "Naomi I need you to remember sweetheart." He said.    "I live at your house" I said putting my hand on his upper thigh.    "Nay Nay baby you fucking with fire" He said with his eyes still on the road. I wanted him. Badly. I didn't know if it was the liquor or me or both. I threw the bottle out the window and leaned close to his ear and hiccuped.    I nibbled and sucked on his neck as I reached for his dick. He gave a groan. I didn't noticed we stopped in front of a house until he opened the car door making me look up. I got out the car on wobbly legs.    He came to my side of the car and gave me a hard kiss, making my knees weaker than what they already were.    I moaned in disappointment as he moved away.    "You're drunk. I'm not taking advantage of you like that. You can stay in my spare room." He said grabbing my hand pulling me towards the house.    Little did he know I wanted him to take advantage of me. Chapter 2 Syanne    I'm that bad bitch Syanne. I'm 23, I'm fine as hell, and get whatever the hell I want. I don't have to work because I have rich men taking care of me.    I'm set for life. Plus, I have no damn kids to take care of like most of my broke ass friends from high school.   "Syanne" My girl Destiny said coming in my house. Yes, I did say house. Unlike my dumb ass little sister, who lives in a ratty ass apartment I live in a 2 story house.    "What's up Dee" I said as she came and sat next to me on the couch. My girl was a looker too. She, like me, got anything she wanted.    "As your friend, I think it's only right to tell you that, Boss and Naomi was together all night." She said. What the hell was my sister doing with my man? Well, my future man.   "What went down?" I asked turning my television off.   "I don't know, he said that he'd take her home. So I waited at her apartment all night and she still did not come home" Destiny explained. I looked at the time on my brand new iPhone 5 and seen that it was 12:45. Why the hell was she out and about with my man?    "Do me a favour, see what went down. I want to know every last detail." I said turning the television back on as Destiny left. I swear if Naomi get in my way I'll make her wish she was never born.   Naomi   It was one in the afternoon when I woke up with a headache. It took me a minute to notice I wasn't in my apartment.    I was laying on white silk sheets looking up a damn mirror on the ceiling. And I look a damn mess. But I couldn't get up and do anything about it. I was scared that if I sat up the headache would get worst. Me and pain didn't do well together, at all.   I heard a door open and looked towards it, and there stood him. The man I thought was a dream. But he's not, he was staring at me with that damn crooked grin making his dimples show.    "You're up." He said walking towards the bed,    "Yes, I am" I said sitting up slowly.    "Here" He said handing me some medicine and water that sat besides the bed.    "Thanks" I said taking the water and pill trying not to look at the hicky on his neck.  "You were a little freaky on the way here last night." He said rubbing his hicky. I literally choked on water.    "Sorry, I don't normally drink that much" I blushed.   "I never knew black women could blush" He said with that damn crooked grin. I laid back down on the bed and pulled the pillow over my face. "I like it"   "Is your name really Boss?" I asked trying to change the subject.   He removed the pillow from my face and held a hand behind his ear. "Name? Boss? Really?"    "Maybe" He said crawling in the bed on my other side.   "Oh" I said. I looked up a the ceiling and seen that he was staring at me. I couldn't help it. I blushed.    I've been with men before, yes, but not any this fine. I didn't know what to do with a man this fine.... Well I could think of a few things that include us being naked.   "What's on your mind?" He asked rubbing my upper arm.    "Oh, Ah.... How cool that mirror is" I blushed. Okay this whole blushing shit had to stop. I was a woman. A 19 year old woman. And he was a man. It was natural.   "Maybe in the future we could put it to perfect use" He whispered in my ear. I could not stop the moan that came out if my mouth. I needed to get a hold of myself. He could get a hold of me.... Kissing me, Licking me, making scream his name as he fucked me long and hard, me riding on his-   "What are you thinking about now?" He asked in a husky voice. I didn't know that I was practically panting. Damn I really did need to get myself together.    Before I could answer he started kissing and licking on my neck. I groaned. I knew I should have let Mr.Blue Balls give me a good fuck before going out last night.    "Mr. Blue Balls?" He stopped looking at me with amusement in his eyes.    "Did I say that out loud?" I asked with wide eyes. I can't believe I said that out loud.    "Yes, I hope he's not another man. Like you said last night, I'm a very jealous man." He said getting on top of me making me open my legs for him.    "N-No it's not a man" I shuddered. I could feel his dick against my thigh. And it wasn't small either. "Boss move I have morning breath"    "No you don't" He said kissing the valley of my breast." You're so damn hot"   Those words was like a million dollars to my ears. This fine ass bartender thought I was hot. I looked up at the ceiling and got even wetter as I looked at his white skin on top of my brown one.   I had on a strapless dress which he pulled under my breast making me try to cover my naked titts. My boobs was one of my flaws. They weren't perky in perfect like Destiny's or Syanne's. They didn't completely sag either though, but they did have a sag to them.   "Stop" He said moving my hands above my head. "I think I'm in love". I swear this man was good for my ego.    "Boss, I ah-" He shut me up with a toe curling, heart stopping, nipple hardening, pussy wetting kiss. I wrapped my legs around his waist as his tongue sled pass my lips making me moan. This man was kissing me in the morning! With my morning breath and all!.   "Naomi, I swear you making weak" He breathed against my lips. "I don't think I could ever speak to a white skinny woman again" With that he sucked my nipple in his mouth.    "Oh" I moaned arching my back. I can't believe he wanted me, like this, that much.    "This for Boss bitches, for money making bitches, all my ladies throw your hands in the air" My phone rang.    "Shit" I said reaching for it but Boss stopped me.    "Don't answer it" He said looking at me with lustful green eyes.    "Its my sister" I said getting the phone and answered it" Hello?"    "Where are you?! It's almost two in the afternoon and you're nowhere to be found!" She yelled into the phone.   "I'm with a- Oh!" I said as Boss kissed his way to my pussy.    "You having sex?!" She yelled. Why the hell was she yelling?    "No I'm not I just have a really bad head ahhhhh!" I moaned as Boss ate my pussy threw my thong.    "Yes you are! Who is it? Is it Boss?! I swear if you fucking my man I'll beat your fat ass" Her man?   "What" I said sitting up moving Boss away from me. He have me confused look.   "I want to see you. NOW!" Syanne yelled before hanging up.    "You have a woman really?!" I yelled fixing my top.    "What?" He said looking at me with a confused frown.    "Syanne Carter.... Does that name ring a bell?" I asked.    "Who?" He asked with that confused frown still on his face. "I don't know a Syanne Carter, Naomi what's wrong?" He said looking like he was telling the truth. But my trust issues are sitting right next to the devil himself.    "Take me home" I said getting out of his bed.    "Naomi wait!" He said grabbing my arm. "I'm telling you the truth, I don't know a Syanne."   I looked at him long and hard. He seemed truthful... That's when I had to remember, my sister head wasn't screwed on correctly.         While writing this chapter I was in church. The sex scene was going to go farther but I felt like a hething Lol. But here you go vote and comment if you will please. Chapter 3 Boss    Naomi been ignoring me for weeks now. All because she think I'm with her sister. I don't even know who her sister is. But it's okay, I'll wait until she's ready..... That's a lie. I'm tiered of waiting, That's why I was at her apartment now.    "What?" She said opening the door. She was the sexiest woman I ever seen. Even if her hair was a mess and she had on a big shirt.   "Hello Beautiful" I said walking in her apartment without permission.    "Boss I don't have time-"    "Baby come back to bed" A male voice said from what I'm guessing was her room. She had another man licking and touching what was mines?    "Who is that?" I asked through clinched teeth.    "None of your buiness" She said rolling her eyes. Everything she did was my business.    I went her room to find a naked black man in her bed.    "Boss get out" She said grabbing my arm. I snatched it away and walked up to the man was now trying to put on his clothes and punched him in the face. "Oh God!"    I was possessive and I thought I told her that.    I didn't let up on beating his ass until I felt Naomi's soft hand on my shoulder. I turned to look at her and I had to pull myself together. She was crying. She had fear in her eyes. I punched him one more time before moving away from him.    "What's wrong with you?!" She yelled at me running to the man on the floor. But he pushed her away and limped out of her apartment.    "You bastard!" She yelled throwing a Nike at me.    "I told you I was a very-"   "I'm not your woman! Just leave and leave me alone!" She yelled pushing me out of her room.    "I'm not leaving so get use to me being here!" I yelled as she closed the door in my face.    Naomi   He was crazy! How dare he come in my house and beat my best male friend like that?!    I didn't want Boss to come in doing those sexy things he do and I get all wet. My friend Mike was already in my apartment so we decided to act like we was busy fucking. I didn't think that would happen.   I called Mike to see if he was okay.   "Hello?" He answered in a pissed tone.    "Are you okay?" I asked.    "Why didn't you tell me the man was Boss?!" He yelled into the phone.    "Ah does it matter?" I asked.   "Yes Chile, it does. James Bond would be scared of him. Hell, the Godfather would run just from hearing his name. Mi Mi, that white boy ain't nothing to fuck with" Did everybody know who Boss was but me?   "I'm sorry Mikey" I apologized.    "You can make it up by giving me all the juicey details on how good he is in bed" Mike said back in his playful mood.   "That will never happen" I laughed.   "Come on I need something to fantasize about, these books are starting to get plain." He whined.   "Call Joe for all your nasty pleasures" I said.   "Baby, you know we taking a break" He said in a sad voice. Joe was his boyfriend of 6 years.    "Call and apologize Mike" I said.   "Did you just curse at me??! I know I didn't hear my name and apologize in the same sentence." He said dramatically.   "Yes I did" I said laughing loudly.    "Naomi!" I heard Boss say.   "Is he still there?" Mike asked.    "Yes and he won't leave." I said rolling my eye. Why do I always get the crazy ones?   "Deal with him and call me back" He said hanging up. I took a deep breath and went to open my room door.   "Yes?" I said as sweetly as I could.   "That wasn't your boyfriend, wasn't? " He asked with a very adorable guilty smirk.   "No he was my gay best friend." I said folding my arms under my chest.   "Look I'm sorry-"   "Are you crazy?" I asked. He didn't look like it, but then again neither did my sister.    "Yes, I am" He said truthfully. Well damn.    "Get out of my house" I said rubbing my temple.   "Naomi, we need to talk" He said with that damn grin on his face.    "No we don't" I said looking away before I did something stupid.    "Remember, I told you when I was sucking and licking on those beautiful breast that you make me weak?" He asked. Boy did I ever? I still dreamed about that night. I even masturbate about that night.    "Yeah So?" I said nonchalantly.    "I was telling the truth" He said. What was up with white people and love at first sight?   "That's impossible, we only known each other for one night and half a day" I said.    "Its not impossible" He said getting close.    "Why you gotta look all good and smell all good?" I asked trying to push him away but he grabbed my wrist and pulled me to his chest.    "I don't know" He said before giving me that heart stopping kiss. I was really beginning to believe I was as crazy as my sister, because I was starting to think of Boss as mines.       "On that Boss shit tonight" Destiny said looking at her outfit in the mirror.   "No bitch, you look like a hooker" Mike said rolling his eyes. Mike never liked Destiny. He said she was rude and fake, and he was allergic to fake bitches.   "At least I don't look like I ran into someone fist.... Oh wait, you did" She said laughing at her own joke.   "Stop it you two" I said putting in my gold stud earrings. Again tonight we were going out. We were going back to Club Paradise.    "Oh yeah, Syanne comin' tonight" Destiny said. "So you won't really need to get all cute because no one will be lookin' at you"   "Bitch, I will beat the fake outta you if you talk to her like that again!" Mike yelled.    "I would have thought that Boss beat the gay outta you, but I guess not" Destiny said rolling her eyes.   "Both of you stop it. And I don't need a man Destiny, so you and Syanne can go dick hopping all you want" I said standing up ready to leave so I can see Boss.   At the club I sat at the bar. I was disappointed that Boss wasn't working tonight. I only got all dressed up and shit just for him. But he won't be able to see it because he wasn't here. Maybe I should text him. Nah.    "This is the second time you sat at my bar looking bored" His sweet voice whispered in my ear. I turned around to see his signature grin.   "I'm not bored" I lied.   "Well that's to bad, I was hoping I could have a dance so you could have fun. But since you're over flowing with joy I guess I'll leave you alone" He said sarcastically.  "Ha, very funny" I said rolling my eyes.   "Naomi!" My sister voice said next to me. "Introduce us"   "I thought you already knew him since he's your man" I said with a sly smile making my sister mad.   "I'm sorry, the last time I checked I was taken by a beautiful woman name Naomi" Boss said with a smirk. That made my sister more pissed than she already was.    "Sorry sis but you shouldn't lie" I said following behind Boss as he pulled me away from Syanne. Chapter 4 Syanne   I can't believe my whore of a sister took my man! The nerve of that bitch. I got something for her ass though. She going to know not to fuck with what's mine.   Naomi   I ended up staying the night at Boss's house. Not because I was drunk, this time I was completely sobber. I stayed the night because I wanted to.   I know he crazy in all but, it's not everyday I get hit on by a man that look like he should be on the cover of GQ. At least he did let me know he was crazy. So I know what I'm dealing with, right?   "So how come so many people scared of you?" I asked sitting up in the bed. I love these damn silk sheets and that damn mirror.    "I'm crazy" He said lighting a joint.    "Like certified?" I asked.    "Not certified, but I don't take shit to well... So I snapped." He said.    "In other words you have anger issues?" I asked. I had them to but learned to control it.   "Maybe" He smirked at me. I don't to much like men who smoke but he looked so damn sexy when he did it.    "So, in your mind, how long have I been your girl?" I asked laying my head on his chest.    "Since you sat your beautiful ass at my bar" He laughed. Ego boost. He really was my very own mirror on the wall. He seemed to think I was beautiful... Fat and all.    For a while we laid there in silence so he could finish smoking. I couldn't help but wonder how my sister was feeling. She was really certified. Not anger issues wise, she was beyond no return. But my parents didn't want to put her in the crazy house. I think that's where the hell she belong.    I remember a time when she killed my toy puddle Betsy. She had the nerve to tell our parents that the little man on her shoulder told her to do. I was only 5 and Betsy was my best friend.    Oh and let's not forget about the time she tied me to the bed when I was sleep and beat me with a cold wet towel. Then I was 11 and she was 15. She hate me for some reason.    I always wished for a sister I could talk to instead of runaway from.    "What you thinking about that got that sad frown on your face?" He asked kissing the top of my head.    "Me and my sister childhood" I said.    "Its that bad?" He asked.   "Worst" I said yawning. I couldn't hear what he said because I was sleep.    Sorry this chapter so short, but hey vote && comment please :)   Rahdah Rahdah Chapter 5 Boss   "The fuck you mean you don't have my money?!" I asked Kevin. Kevin 'borrowed' 5 g's from me almost a year ago and this fucker still didn't have my money.   "Look I got bills and child support to pay" He said with an attitude.    "And I suppose to care why?" I asked moving from behind my desk to stand in front of him.    "I'll have your damn money aight" He said getting ready to leave. He didn't get far because my boy Shawn punched him making him fall on his ass.   "I been nice for almost a damn year about my money but now shit about to get real" I said standing over him as he held his lip.   "You crazy!" He yelled looking up at me.   "Just a little" I said pulling my gun out pointing it at his head.   "Boss!" I heard Naomi voice as she busted into my office. When she seen the gun in my hand her eyes got wide.   "Naomi who let you in?" I asked with irritation.    "Twittle Dee and Twittle Dumb" She said pointing at my bodyguards. "What's this?" She asked walking towards me looking at Kevin the whole time.   "Business" I said still pointing the gun at Kevin who thought I didn't notice the knife he pulled out of his pocket and hid it behind his back.   "You know I'm majoring in law right?" She asked with her hands on her hips.    "He owe me money" I said nonchalantly.    "And the best thing to do is to kill him?" She asked bending down and took the knife from behind Kevin back. I arched a brow at her and she shrugged. "I hate the sight of blood"   "Baby can you leave?" I asked. I had business to handle and she was stopping it.    "No" She said sitting in the seat Kevin was sitting in. I swear I heard my boys gasp when she said no. Everyone know I don't do to well with disobedience.    "Naomi, Ima ask you one more time-"   "Or what? You going to hit me? Shoot me? I'd like to see you try." She said with a smirk. And that's why I don't date black women.   "Yo girl sitting here disrespecting you and you think I'm supposed to take you serious?" Kevin laughed. Before I could say anything Naomi stood up and kicked him in the face breaking his nose.    "Shut up. I'm not in the damn mood for bullshit do you hear me?" She yelled at Kevin. I swear I'm in love.    "We need to talk" She said looking at me with hatred.    "About?" I asked curious.    "Alone" She growled. I motioned for my boys to get Kevin and leave. Once the door was closed behind them she punched me in the face.    "What the-"   "How could you?!" She screamed at me. "Of all people my best friend? Or at least I thought she was my best friend"   "What?" I asked still shocked that she punched me.   "You fucked Destiny!" She yelled showing me a video on her phone. I don't remember fucking that ghetto ass white girl. I bet y'all thought she was black.    "That's not me" I said. He had hair like mine and that was it, but it wasn't me.    "Dont-"   "Look at it Naomi!" I yelled turning it around so she could see. I seen her face go from anger to realization back to anger in one whole minute.    "That bitch!" She yelled throwing the phone across the room. Next went the chair and anything else she could find to throw. Once she came down one of my bodyguards came in asking was I okay.   "She hate me that much that she would do this!" She yelled. "I beat Destiny ass thinking that was you she was fucking!"   "Who sent you that?" I asked going behind my desk to roll up a blunt because that's what the fuck she need.   "Syanne, I didn't even watch it, all I seen was your name and Destiny's and your hair and went crazy." She sighed sitting back in the chair.    "Jealous much?" I asked lighting the blunt. She looked up at me with a smirk.   "I didn't tell you? I don't like sharing" She said taking the blunt I handed her and took a puff. Yup, I was in love.   Naomi   My sister went to for with this shit. Really? To send me a video of Destiny fucking some random guy saying it was Boss made me more than pissed.   But I have something for her crazy ass. She think she crazy? That bitch don't have shit compared to Naomi Kyla Carter!    Who else think Meagan Good Is Fuck Worthy?    What About HaydenPanettiere?   I Buy A Strap Juss For Hayden Fine Ass!!! Chapter 6 Naomi   Dressed for battle I walked in my sister house without knocking. I let that bitch think she got away with that stunt she pulled for a whole week only because Boss wanted me to. But it was time to take action.   "The fuck wrong with you?" Syanne yelled as she tried to cover her naked body from me. The bitch had the nerve to get head like shit cool. Hold the fuck up??!! Destiny was the one giving her head!   "Well damn" I laughed. These bitches gay. Destiny stood up with wide eyes. The bitch was scared of me after that was whooping I gave her ass. "Y'all bitches gay"   "I'm not gay" Syanne protested.    "I didn't come here to argue about your sexuality." I said rolling my eyes.   "Then why you here?" Syanne asked. All I really wanted to do was beat that bitch until I couldn't beat her no more. Obviously she don't give a fuck that we family. Sisters.    "Ron contacted me" I said holding up my phone so she could see our textes. I wasn't texting Ron though. It was his baby momma Tonya. Tonya been wanting to get on Syanne ass since Syanne did what she did.    "Why are you texting my man?" She asked standing up looking like the crazy bitch she really is.    "Nothing really, he wanted your number, since you've changed it he don't have it." I said untruthful. I had a plan and this was only phase one.       Boss wanted to surprise me. You know how white men are, all romantic and shit. So I got dressed in my black high-low dress with the badge belt around the waist, my red 8 inch closed toe platform wedges, fixing my long hair in loop curls, I put on a touch of make-up but not to much and put on some red lipstick. If I might say so myself I look good.    When I got Boss big ass house he came outside and led me inside. My man was looking good in his white polo cardigan. I always like the look of a man with muscles in a cardigan, but Boss man it look like his very own style.   Boss had rose pedals on the floor leading to the kitchen, candles lit, and soft music. White men, I thought smiling.    "Sit that lovely ass down" He said pulling out my chair for me.   "Very romantic" I laughed sitting down.   "I cooked!" He said excitedly going to get plates and placed them on the table. I can tell he was raised by a black woman. Fried chicken, corn bread, collard greens, yams, and sweet potato pie. And it all smelled good. All he was missing was the neck bones... Wait he just sat them on the table.   "Hope you wasn't looking for fancy shit. I only learned how to cook soul food" He said sitting down in the chair next to mine.   "Who taught how to cook?" I asked. He gave me that damn smirk and fixed our plates. "You know I'm trying to lose weight"   He gave a dramatic sigh and sat a plat in front of me.    "For what? You not big. You have curves in all the right places" He said kissing my lips softly.   "Ego booster" I smiled.   We ate, talked, drink wine, and laughed. He might be crazy but he was knew how to keep a conversation going. I didn't have to lift a finger as he cleaned the table.   "Would it be to forward if I said I want to fuck you right here right now?" He asked looking in my brown eyes with his green ones.    "God no" I said breathlessly. Those few words juss made me wet.   "Good" He said kissing me. He stood up, picked me up as if I weighed nothing and sat me on the table.    "Wow" I said as he smirked at me. He picked me up. Now that was a damn turn on. I kissed him pulling him between my legs. I was hot for the this white boy. Real hot. So damn hot I'd melt ice.   "Lay back" He said while pulling my dress over my head. I laid back and put my feet on the end of the table as he kneeled between my legs. "No panties? I like"   He kissed everywhere but where I needed him. I was starting to get frustrated. He kissed, licked, and sucked on my thighs until I growled out his name in frustration.  "Mad bro?" He chuckled. Then I felt his hot tongue run across my clit lightly.    "Fuck Boss stop playing!" I said. And he did stop playing. He ate me out so good I swear I was speaking a whole other language.    And when he sucked my clit in his mouth I lost it. I came, hard. I grabbed a hand full of his hair and grind my face on his tongue. Once I road out my orgasm I let his head go breathing hard.    "You taste so damn good" He said kissing up my body until he got to my nipples. He sucked a nipple in his mouth making me horny all over again. He went from one nipple to the next making me moan his name.    "Take your clothes off" I said. When he stood back to undress I sat up on my elbows and watched. Every piece of clothing he took off made me wetter and wetter. He had a body that was made by God himself. A his tattoos just made it all better.    But once those pants fell to the floor I swear I almost passed out. This mother fucker look 12 inches. I didn't know that was even possible in non-porn star men.    He got a condom out of his pocket and handed it to me. I sat up and opened it quickly and rolled it on his big fat dick. Damn was I lucky and cursed at the same damn time. I don't even know if it's going to fit.    He laid me back down and kissed me as he slid in inch by inch.                   Chapter 7 Syanne   I showed up looking like a boss. I been in love with Ron since I first saw him. But I knew he wasn't mine.   He belong to me and if I can't have him NO bitch can, that's why that bitch had to go!    His girl, what ever her name was, would always get in my way. That's why I had to kill her. I don't like it when bitches fuck with my men. Hint: that's why I had to kill Naomi next.    She been all up on my man dick like crazy. Boss don't want her. He told me so himself last night while we were fucking.    Baby I don't want that fat bitch. He said diving deep in my pussy.    Then let her know. I moaned wrapping my legs around his waist.    I did but she won't listen. He said. I love you and you only.    So you see my sister is in the way of true love.    When I walked in the building Ron told me to meet him I knew this had to be some sick joke. It was filthy and it stink.    "Well, if it isn't the crazy bitch herself." A female voice said from the dark side of the room.    "Who are you?" I asked calmly. When they stepped into the light I hissed.    Naomi   When I heard my sister hiss I couldn't stand to look at her like that. No matter how much bad shit she did to me she was still my sister. But I couldn't help but feel sorry for her. She was crazy and needed the help.   "I thought you said you killed her!" another voice that wasn't my sister's said.   "I did, I swear I did" my sister said.   "Why is she alive? I saw that she was dead in my own eyes." a different voice from the first two said.    "Lets fuck the bitch" a gay voice said.   My sister was really crazy. With each voice her facial expression changed.    "Shut up!" I yelled on the verge of crying. All voices hushed at once.    "Damn your sister really is crazy" Tonya said wide eyed. I know most of y'all think me and Tonya set my sister up to die. But we didn't have the strength to kill my sister. So we have police in the back listening. Most likely they're not going to throw her in jail because of her mental illness.    "You bitch! I'll kill you six weeks before mommy made you!" Syanne yelled at me.    "Syanne you need help. Professional help. You just admitted to attempting to kill Tonya, and you're talking to youself-"   "I'm not crazy! I'm not crazy! I'm not crazy!" She sat on the floor with her hands over her ears yelling.    I turned and motioned for the police to come out. I didn't have the guts to beat up my crazy sister. She needed professional help. And beating her ass wouldn't make it better.    "Ima kill you Naomi!" She yelled as the police carried her out. I couldn't stop the tears that ran down my cheeks as I watched them fight with carrying my sister out the door.    "It's okay Naomi, this was better from her than beating the living shit outta her" Tonya said rubbing my back.     "Baby, you here?" Boss asked as he came in my apartment. I was sitting in the bed with his phone in hand.    "Why didn't you answer me?" He asked crawling in bed to kiss me. "What You doing with my phone?"    I was still reading the messages. I read them like 20 times already. Trying to convince myself that he wasn't texting her. But the evidence was right in my face.    Destiny: Baby come home I need you.   Boss: Give me a min. Naomi being needy and shit.    Destiny: Fuck her fat ass! I need you! ;(   Boss: I jus got doin' that l.o.l   Destiny: Boss don't play with me!    Boss: I'm not. It was good asf too. ;)    Destiny: Baby I know you playin so ima let that slide, now bring yo ass here and come fuck me until I can't take it.    Boss: Yes ma'am ;)      "Baby?" Boss said taking the phone from my hand. How could he do this? I thought he said he loved me? Was it because I'm fat? Or was it because I'm black? Or both? I thought I found a man that appreciates me for me.    "How could you?" I asked with tears clouding my vision. "For two months you made me think I was the only one! And to find out you're fucking Destiny!"    "Baby that was a long time ago, before we-"    "It doesn't matter, it was during the time we met! During the time you said I was your girl but I wasn't! So it's still. technically cheating!" I yelled.    "Baby llisten-"   "Don't baby listen me! Get out!" I yelled pushing him off my bed. The bed where we conceived the child I'm carrying.    "I'm not going nowhere" He said pinning me on the bed. "I love you. I admitt that I fucked Destiny, but it was before us baby. Before we made it official. I fucked up and I'm man enough to say it, but I'm not going nowhere. I'm here to stay whether you like it or not"   I wish he'd get off me and stop looking at me with those damn green eyes so I could stay mad.    "You said i was needy" I whispered.    "I'm sorry, baby" He said kissing all over my face.    "I'm not needy" I protested weakly.    "I know baby" He said kissing his way down my body.    "You left me for her" I said. God he was driving me crazy.    "No I didn't, if you think about it, those messages was two months ago, you know our first official date." He said pulling my shorts down. "I was there with you the whole night, hell the whole damn week"   Oh, I remembered.    "But... Oh!" I moaned as he sucked my clit in his mouth. I'll blame it on the hormones the reason I want him so bad.    "Ahhh fuck!" I moaned as I came. Yup, the hormones. Chapter 8 Naomi   I have to admit it. I'm in love with Boss.    I think he knows it to. He seem to know just what to do to make me forgive every little stupid shit he do. And like a dumb ass I keep letting him do the same thing. Maybe it's because I'm scared I'll never find another man to want me the way he do.    I was at Starbucks with my cousin Lisa when they started shooting. People were screaming and babies where crying. I was scared and I swear I felt pain in my lower region. I was on the ground crying in pain as they continued to shoot.    "Lisa!" I cried. But when I looked next to me she laying in a pull of her own blood. That got a loud pitch scream from me. I tried to get reach her but every movement I make bring pain. I had to make sure she was okay, I couldn't let her die. I didn't want her to die! She had a fiancee and kids to stay alive for.    "Someone call the ambulance!" A male voice yelled as the shooting stopped. "We have two injured"   "Lisa... Get Lisa to the hospital" I groaned before blackness surrounded me.    Taylor   "Lisa... Get Lisa to the hospital" She groaned. She was shot and all she could think about was the person next to her? I couldn't do nothing but admire her. And by the looks of it she was pregnant also.    "Call 911" I yelled as people just stood around. I couldn't let this beautiful brave woman die. She needed to live, so I could find out her name.    Boss   I was panicking like hell. When I got the call that said the love of my life was shot I felt like someone ripped my heart right out of my chest. He couldn't die, She had to marry me and have my babies.    When I got to the hospital her cousins fiancee and their kids were already in the waiting area.    "That okay?" I asked.    "I don't know?! They been back there for almost 20 minutes! And they're not letting me know anything!" He yelled scaring his kids.    "Calm down they'll be okay." I Saud hoping that it true.    Syanne    That bitch got just what she deserved. Did she think that she was going to get pregnant with my man baby and live? I have bitches on the outside to do my dirty business while I'm on lock down. And from what they told me the bitch was good as dead.    Bye bye Naomi, Hello Boss, I thought with a wicked smirk.    Taylor    I've been waiting for almost 2 hours with the fiancee of one of the women from the shoot out and no one came out yet. I found out through him that her name was Naomi. And her boyfriend Boss was a little over protective. But not protective enough since he left after 3 minutes of waiting and never came back.    She was by far the most beautiful black woman I have ever seen. And caring also. She cared more about her friend life than hers. And she was the pregnant one.    "Jalisa Jones family?' The doctor called. Jalisa's fiancee got up quick to see what the doctor wanted. I watched his facial express as the doctor explained her condition.    From the looks of it, it wasn't anything good. Once he came back to sit down I couldn't help but to ask if she was alright.    "She's on life support. But the doctor don't think she'll live" He said through his tears.    "I know she'll come through" I said trying to comfort him.    "Naomi Scott's family" I looked around and noticed no one got up so I got up for her.    "Relationhip with the patient?" The doctor asked.    "Fiancee" I said.    Well Tell Me What You Think. You Guys Opinions Are Very Important To Me. Chapter 9 Naomi (three weeks later)    I hate Boss with every bone in my body. The whole time I was in the hospital he did not come visit. All those times he told me he loved me was a lie. And my dumb ass believed it!   But it was one man that was there for me the whole time.    Tayor.   He was one fine ass Puerto Rican. And one caring person. He made sure I had every thing I needed. And he even song for me. But that was two weeks ago. When he was trying to make me happy.    It was hard for me to be happy. I lost my baby. The baby that belonged to Boss. I really wanted to have a baby. But I guess God have other plans.    "Bonita, You here?" Taylor asked as he came in my apartment. Yes, I gave him a key.    "In here!" I yelled from my room.    "Sorry I'm late" He said crawling on the bed next to me. The man knew how to make a plan black suit look exotic.    "It's okay" I smiled at him. I don't know what kind of work he did but it paid off. The man drove a Ferrari!    "So have you considered my request?" He asked taking the remote from my hand, turned the tv and relaxed.    His request... He asked me last week to be his woman. Just like that. No sweet talking or nothing. Okay maybe we did hang for a week and he did treat me to like a rich person does for a week. But still.   Honestly though, I still loved Boss. Even though I haven't seen him for three weeks. I miss him so damn much that it makes me mad. Why can't I just fall out of love with him and move on? You know what? Ima start moving on at this very moment.    "Yes I have, and I'd love to be your woman" I smiled at him. He smiled back and kissed me. It was one of those kisses that binded souls together. It was so intense I had to pull away.   "Prometo amarte siempre, Naomi" He whispered against my lips.    "I don't know what you just said but it sound so damn sexy" I moaned and pulled him in for another kiss. He chuckled and pulled me onto his lap.    Boss    My whole body hurt. Like I been hit by an eighteen wheeler. I don't know where I am or what's going on. But I do know that who ever did this to me was going to get hurt. These fuckers had me chained to a damn wall!   The last thing I remember was stepping outside to call my boy Moe at the hospital. Then BOOM! I blacked out.    "Well he's awake." I heard her voice say. I knew that voice anywhere.   "Destiny?" I asked looking around. She stepped in front of me with a frown. "Baby, you did this to me?"    "I told you If I can't have you, no one can" She said. This bitch was crazy.    "So you kidnap me?" I asked sarcastically.    "No! I ... Look I love you Boss! I can't lose you to that fat bitch" She said sitting on the floor in front of me.    "How long I been here?" I asked looking around.   "Ummmm.... Three weeks" She said blushing.    "Three weeks!" I yelled then my head started hurting.    "Baby-"    "Don't baby me! You let Syanne rub off on you. You crazy" I said. She got up and walked over to a box in a corner.    "Yeah I am" She said pulling a gun out the box and pointed it me.   "Destiny baby-"    "I'm crazy for you" She said and pulled the trigger.   Destiny    Is he gone? A voice asked.   "Yes, he's dead" I said looking down at the love of my life dead body.   You've done good by me. The voice in my head said.   "What next master?" I asked.    Clean this up. It said. Take It to the river, then find Naomi. Tell her that he was killed by her sister.    "Yes master" I smirked as I cleaned up the crime scene.                      Well Damn! That Escalated Quickly Lol.   But Comment && Vote. Let Me Know What You Think Is Going To Happen.   Start A Damn Book Club In My Comments!!! Do Something Lol Chapter 10 Naomi    Taylor wasn't no Boss. He was a boss, but he wasn't Boss. He was on some mafia shit. What was up with me and thugs? Why can't I attract a regular guy?   We were at the mall and he had body guards. Although they couldn't be seen because they were dressed to blend in and wasn't really following us. But still was that necessary?   But one thing was real about him. He made me laugh. He was the playful type and I like that. And he was such a romantic. He did everything to try to make me forget about Boss. But I still can't help to be hurt that he not once tried to get in contact with me.   "Naomi!" I heard Destiny yell. I was in Coach and this bitch want to yell like a ghetto hoe.   "What?" I snapped. Taylor put his hand on my back to calm me down.   Destiny looked between me and Taylor with a frown.   "Boss is dead and you're out here fucking Mexicans?!" She yelled making everyone look at us. I swear I couldn't breathe. Did she just say Boss was dead? That can't be.   "Dead?" I struggled to get out.   "Yes. Dead as in gone Naomi" She whispered with tears in her eyes.   Taylor pulled me to his chest and let me cry. The man I loved was dead, and I was out with another man. That fact alone made it worst. I pushed myself from Taylor's arms and stared at Destiny.   "Don't play like tha Destiny" I cried. I so hope she was joking. He can't be dead. I have to beat his ass. I have to hug him and tell him how much I love him. I have to a be with him. I.... I.... Can't lose him!   "I'm not Naomi. I was there when she shot him" She cried. She?   "Who?" I asked now angery.   "Syanne had me to check her out the institute. She took him to her house and shot him" Destiny said. Syanne?! That bitch was good as dead.   I got to the crazy house my sister was in and asked to see my sister. The lady led me to a room and told me to wait. And when my sister came I was on her.   "Why you do it?!" I yelled as I punched her in the face. I wasn't letting up until the people pulled me off of her.   "Bitch! I'll kill you!" She yelled sitting in the corner in fetal potion.   "Why did you kill Boss?!" I yelled. She sat up quick and looked at me.   "Boss dead?" She asked in the verge of crying.   "Don't start with the fake tears. Why did you take him from me?" I cried as the guard held me back.   Next thing I know she started crying hard. Its one thing I know about my sister, I know her fake cry from the real one. And the shortness of breath and red face was proof she was crying for real.   Then it hit me.   "Can I speak to one of the nurses?" I asked the guard. He nodded and left me alone with Syanne.   "I didn't want him to die! I didn't do it! Why?" She cried.   I walked out of the room to speak to the nurse. And I found out she was never released. That mean that Destiny lied to me.    Now that bitch is really going to get it.       Random Person   I was out on the river fishing with my son when he seen a body float our way. I hurried and dialed 911 as I pulled the man on the boat.    "Is he breathing?" The operater asked. I checked his pulse and his heart was still beating.   "His heart is beating" I said. "He been shot"    He had a bullet in his head. How was he still living after getting shot in the head?   I have a plan. A voice said as loud as day. And being a preacher and a man of God, I knew that the Lord had something great for this young man. Curves part 2 coming soon Naomi   Its been 8 months since Destiny killed my man. I wanted that bitch ass, but the bitch up and left.   I felt heart broken. I stayed locked in Boss house for three whole months. I didn't eat or sleep much. There for I lost too much damn weight. But it's okay.    I came out of my depression and knew I had to do something. So I went down to Club Paradise and let them know what was up. I made sure I had my 9mm on me. So the first who protested got shot. And when he got shot they all knew Naomi Carter was real.    Old Naomi was gone. Replaced by a cold hearted woman. A woman who was out for revenge. A woman who was climbing to the top.    I Naomi Carter is Lady Boss. The new Boss in town.    Cameron    I stood in front of my house not knowing what the hell I was doing. I don't remember this place. But I had to start somewhere. I had to know what my pass was like. And needed to know the reason I got shot.    Did I have beef? Did I sleep with someone wife again? Was it Rodney? I swear she told me she wasn't married. But I thought me and him smoothed that out.    From what doctors confirmed, I lost three years worth of memories. I remember being in college to get my business degree for a club I wanted to open. From what I heard, I succeeded. And the club was the most popular one in Miami. I was lost. And I didn't like being lost. It pissed me off when I felt lost.    I needed to find answers and they rested in the pass. Who did it? And why?           This Is Little Sneek Peek ;) Lol Comment, Let Me Know If You're Ready For Me To Start.    Vote     Comment     Fan     ;) Publication Date: January 20th 2014 https://www.bookrix.com/-ouf55708ce6dd25
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-taneshia-franklin-sassy-2/
Taneshia Franklin Sassy Believe half of what you hear and none of what you see I dedicate this book to my husband and four children who have been my fan base for years and always encouraged me to dream big and write even bigger Text: all illustrations are the sole idea of Taneshia Franklin All rights reserved. Publication Date: October 5th 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-taneshia
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-unknown-vanille-evol/
unknown . Vanille Evol To a book that always had many pages to be read and many pages to be seen Lost "Come here Scarlet, come here," a tall beautiful boy whispered in my ear. He kept softly stroking my arm and whispering to me these constantly foreign words. He smiled at me meekly,"You're so close to finding me," as he softly played with the curls at the end of my brown hair. "Finding what?" I whispered, "what are you talking about?" This boy had soft dark hair swept messily to the side of his face. He had black eyes. Darker than the night sky. His skin looked as soft as a cuddly blanket, while cuddling up in it, watching you favorite movie. He was well built, I could feel it when he held me. But for some reason he was wearing a dark, black hood that seemed to swallow his lean body in whole. "I need you to know that." "Know what?" I aked hungrily. He was silent for a while. "Know what!" I shouted getting upset at him. But he just smiled sadly at me in way that would make you want to cry. "Scarlet! Scarlet!" someone shouted in the distance. I looked up in the sky of darkness and lighting as I heard my name coming in forcefulness. When I looked back down the boy with the beautiful, yet treacherous eyes was gone. What? Where did he go, I thought. "Scarlet, Scarlet!" I looked up into the eyes of my older sister Court, as I lyed in my covers. "Finally!" she exasperated,"you take forever to get up! If you didn't wake up sooner I would of got some water and poured it on your head!" "Gee, thanks!" I grumbled. "Yeah whatever, just get up and get ready. You only got 20 minutes to get ready before I leave without you!" Court walked away, sweeping her long blonde hair right of her petite shoulders. "Ugh...," I grumbed. I walked out of my bed, and made it quickly, not caring about how it looked. I ran to the bathroom and gently inserted the contacts into my eyes blinking quickly as they slipped in so I could see. I washed my face with the acne clenser, not that I needed it, and took out my nasty saliva retainers out of my mouth. "Tell me again why I can't look perfect every morning instead of looking like a complete slob." I quickly threw on some makeup and tried to tame my freak curls. I had really bad curls in the morning. They were definately not the pretty kinds, they were the kinds you literally hated. I quickly ran a staightner through them like I usually did, but they came out as looking like beachy curls, not straight. "Great," I whispered under my breath. It's not that I didn't think I was ugly, because I knew I wasn't ugly. I just wasn't gorgeous, I thought. I'd much rather have that gorgeous straight blonde hair and turned, soft looking nose, white skin,and beautiful green iris eyes as Court did. But not me, I had beachy looking curly hair paired with pouty lips and dark brown eyes with tan skin. Joy. Now some girls might want this, but I didn't, I'd much rather have what Court had. I ran down to our new house we had just moved into two days ago. Mom's hair was brushed in blonde high ponytail, and her brown eyes were looking fixingly into the box of crap we still had from our old house. "Morning woman", I teased. "MOM," she said correctly. I laughed, "Ok." "Are you ready for school..Courts waiting outside in her car waiting for you." "Yeah, I know." "Well if you know, then maybe you should get your bag, and go in the car, you don't want to be late on your first day of school." "Fine." I was not happy about changing schools, after my mom got switched into a new area for work, I wasn't too happy about this, especially leaving my old friends. But I guess it was good for her in a way. Leaving that house was probably better for her after my so-called "father" left her for a 20 year old woman, which was creepy because she was just 3 years older than me. I mean when I was in 3rd grade she was in 6th grade. While she was worrying about how to get A's for mommy and daddy, my dad was going to work. My mom needed to move on and leave , but sadly Court and me had to tag along. "I love you," I yelled out the door. "Me too!" she exclaimed. I entered Court's old red bug, and got in, moving my bag in my lap as I sat into the rattered seats. "Ready for a another fresh day at highschool!" my sister exlcaimed happily. Unlike me, Court was rather excited about restarting the last semester of a new senior year. Me on the other hand, was not excited about staring the next semester of being a junior. "Sure." "Lighten up," she said nicely, as we slowly exited off of the bumpy drive through to a new highschool called Nowr. As we went towards the free-way to make a turn, I looked down at the window, and thought I saw a flap of large, huge wings, as big as blanket, pass our car quite fast. wow, I thought, they must have big birds in Pensylvania compared to Missisipi. Oh Me! Oh Boys! Court slowly drove pulled into the parking lot of Nowr Highschool. The place could be literally described in 1 word, and that word would be "crap". The school building I could guess was first painted green with some yellow random streaks of bumble bee yellow. But now the green had some splashes of spray paint. Some even had some words, like one stupid spary painted graffiti crap, that said,"Get High or Die." "Well isn't that nice," I whispered under my breath. "Hm?" Court said. But I ignored her, and got out of her red bug slapping the door louder than intended. I pulled my black fall boots up a little, and rezipped the zipper of my light denim beach shorts. Court looked a me angrily and said,"Look I get that your upset and all, but don't take it out on Lady." Lady was what Court called her red bug, probably because it was red ,and the seats were leathered black, like a ladybug i guessed. Well, ripped up leatherd black seats. She bought it from her old boyfriend in Missisipi, well not really bought more like bribed him with her fashionable Court "kissies", and got the car for FREE. But she'll stop at nothing, to get what she wants. "Sorry." "Whatever, just go to your AP English and make loser friends, bye." With a toss of her blonde hair glimmering in the sun, she ran to her class while her thigh cut off dress looked as if she was going to flash some one. Every guy, at least almost every guy, looked at her while she ran past them. Of course she got the look, she always did. I looked in "Ladys" outer mirror and re-applyed my flavored gloss. As I started walking toward the bumble bee school, about two boys wolf whistled at me. I rolled my eyes annoyingly. Pigs. As I opened the door a tall muscular boy with blonde spikey hair and a set of grey eyes, came out of no where and poked my stomache. I slapped him in the face as hard as I could. "What is your problem?" I yelled. All eyes looked toward me as I fixed my pair of not-so-happy eyes at him. "Just messing around," he smiled in a playboy way. It looked as if this was a normal thing for him like I would act as if nothing bad happened because of that sexy,playful smirk. Ha, well sadly for him that never worked on a girl like me. "Well go mess around with someone else, because honestly...I would never want to mess around wtih a moron like you." A few teens started laughing hysterically like this was the funniest thing on earth, and a few other people just said their Oo's at him. His face turned into sudden shock, like not once a girl has ever turned him down. Then, his ears turned a vivid red. Crap. "What makes you think your so special,princess." "What makes you think that I am." "Your fiesty," he smiled ,"I like that, princess." Then his face turned into a sudden smirk, and he walked away like he had won. Whatever. All of the sudden a girl with long red hair pulled into a tight ponytail, and with green eyes just like Court, came over. "Hi!, she squeeked,"my name is Danny." "Oh..um hi Danny, my name is.." "Scarlet, she had interupted," Scarlet Charlie." "How did you..?" "I work in the school's office, and heard about two new students joining us into Nowr Highschool!" she interupted again. "I just heard that you two moved from..." "Missisipi,"I replied. "Yep! Missisipi," she gushed. "I already saw your sister um Coort?" "It's Court..." "Haha yes Court, I meant to say...and she seems to already have friends! Pretty impressive." "She's always been like that," I replied unevenly. Court always made friends easily. She always had THE perfect boyfriend, and she always had perfect A's on her perfect report card. While I had a difficult time making friends, and as for boys. I got boys eyes, but I didn't want to date any normal guy right now. Ever since I've had that dream about the boy with the dark eyes, I couldn't stop thinking about him. He was so gorgeous, even though he was just a dream, he seemed so realistic. "Well seeing the way you totally dropped Noal's ego, I would say you already have a best friend!" she chirped. "Ok, friends it is," I replied. I didn't know Danny that very well, but she seemed like a cute nerdy friend, and I could tell she was pretty positive. Plus the friend thing didn't come natural to me like it did to Court, so I should keep the options on top. "What class do you have right now?" said preppy Danny. "Umm..." I checked my schedule on the paper index card they gave to me on Sunday. "AP English." "Me too!" exclaimed Danny. "This is great! Already I can see the headlines! Scarlet and Danny walking to AP English!" She dragged me into the classroom through the halls. There was one big desk, and in each desk two students were seated. "Sadly we have assigned seating, so you'll have to go to Mr. Garret so you can be seated with someone," Danny said sadly. "But we have lunch together! So that's always good!" I walked to the desk as all the students rushed to their assigned spots next to there I guess "English" partner. Mr. Garret was in a white shirt with his tie loose around his neck. His face was burried underneath piles of papers grading each one careful, altough his face was hidden. "Excuse me, um Sir." Slowly Mr. Garret pulled his face away from his papers. He was a handsome man, with blonde hair slicked back to his head, and pierced hazel eyes. He seemed to look in his young 20's which was strange.He suddenly smiled, but his smile wasn't kind. It was creepy smile, like a smile that said,"Hi, I don't know you, but can I rape you?" "I'm new here, and I was wondering where I can sit," I replied shakily. "Mmmm," he hummed, licking his lips, looking around the class room. He kept looking around the class, looking mostly at the empty seat by the "girl" than the "boy" in the corner. "Right over there," he motioned by the only girl with an empty seat. But as I walked over there it was quickly filled with a brunette girl. The only seat left was by the boy with dark black hair, but I couldn't see his face. Mr.Garret looked furious. He seemed mad that I had to be seated with this boy. It's like he had something against him...or any guy that I seemed to have to sit by. "Take the seat by Mr. Jack," he pointed toward the boy in a disgraced, angry way. "No talking to him." Was it just her..or was Mr.Garret jealous? He seemed creepy already, and he licked his lip while staring. No..he was a teacher..a 20 year old teacher that looked some what like Zac Efron. But yet, he frightend her. As Scarlet made her way toward the boy, all eyes went toward her as she sat down next to him. All of the sudden she smelt mildew, rain ,and a hot sticky boy scent linger into the seat next to her. For some reason his scent was so overwhelming it made her feel...comfortable...like she's smelt this scent before. As she put her leather bag on her desk, he looked at her. He was gorgeous. He had the black dark brown hair, he had the soft looking skin, an angular jaw line, and dark, oh so dark eyes. His dark eyes consumed her in one bit, and his nose lightly scattered with just the right freckles in the right spot, scrunched. "Hi," he said in a seductive low voice,"I'm Darek." "And I'm Scarlet," I said. I felt as if I was going to melt any second. He nodded silently,snapping some cinnamon gum in his mouth,"Yeah, I know." Right when I was about to ask him how he knew..Mr.Garret told us to open our English text books to page 215, and fill out our vocabulary. As class went on and on, I looked over at Darek a couple of time, sneaking a peak of what he was doing. He was writing, but not his 48 vocabulary words, he was writing what looked like a story or poem. I leaned over and saw it. Her eyes dark tells a story Maybe she'll come and tell me every morning That she loves me enough to take away the scary While we dance along to the midnight, while soaring I watched him loop his cursive handwriting through and through, creating and designing more and more words. Jealous about who this girl was for some reason, as I watched him closely, Derek turned and looked at me. "Someones a bit nosy huh?" he smirked as his eyes danced into a smirk, I could smell his wonderstruck cinnamon gum from here. "Just curious about what you were writing," I said looking down at my desk. A habit when I was really nervous. "Cute," he said,then he came so close to me, I could feel his hot breath cascading down my ear, "but you should know that I like to keep my things quiet." I blushed really bad, and I could tell because he laughed and winked at me. What if he was just a player like Noel was when I met him. No..I thought, he seemed so much..out there. The teacher Mr. Garret looked at me and Darek a few times. Creeper,I thought. Even though Mr. Garret was good looking, he looked like nothing compared to Darek. "Now class," said Mr. Garret annoyingly,"your table each has an assignment to complete. You and your table partner will construct a poem about how you feel about that person sitting next to you in class. This assignment must be at least 7 lines in depth, and is due next Wednesday. So good luck." Oh great, I thought just tea in my cup. First I make a fool of myself at him, and now I'll have to do it in front of everyone! Great. The bell noisly rang and as all the students grabbed their belongings, and ran out the door, Mr. Garret came up to Darek and I. "If you two don't want to do the poem, I'd be glad to switch you to someone else," he said looking straight at me. "It really be no issue!" he exclaimed. "Why?" I asked. "I don't know, maybe if you feel more comfortable with someone else..." he went on. "Thanks Mr. Garret," Darek had jumeped in, "but I think me and Scarlet will get along just fine." Mr.Garret looked up. He looked mad at Darek. Almost furious. But Darek look really, really furious like he was protecting me almost, which almost seemed silly I guess, since I just barely met him an hour ago. "Ok then," Mr. Garret said with a fake smile plastered on his face,"do well." Right as I was about to ask him what was that about he replied," I'll come over to your house today around 4:15.." "Um..ok, do you even know where I live?" I asked. He just smiled that same smile that felt so familiar. As he walked out of the classroom silently looking back at me, and then leaving, I grabbed my things and slipped my bag on my shoulder. As I slipped my bag on my shoulder I saw a feather right where Darek had been just sitting. It was a crisp white feather stained in some black, like it was drenched in ink. I picked it up examing it, and stuffed it in my pocket of my bag. Two feathers in one day so far... Werid, I thought. I started walking fastly out of the classroom, feeling Mr. Garret's pierced eyes glued to the back of me. Surprise After school Court and I went back into the car and drove off. I listened in the car annoyingly as she told me how many guys looked at her and asked her out. She even told me how many friends she made. I only made friends with a perv, a dorky friend, and a strange handsome boy. For lunch I hardly sat by anybody! I was a total loner. I just walked around quietly around the lunch room getting glances at tons of kids. They were probably thinking, "what the heck is that chick doing?" Well, that girl is freaking confused. I didn't know where to sit, but for some reason, I just wanted to be myself! "..And then he asked me out!" Court smiled, interuptng my thoughts. "Hm?" "Will you ever pay any attention! Gosh! See this is why I never tell you anything! You never even listen." "Sorry, kinda got bored of you talking about yourself," I mumbled. "I was just saying what happened today at school. Maybe you should try it?" "Okay, you want to know what happened at school today? I got talked to by a perv, I made a dorky friend..and oh? you wanna know what else? I have a CREEP teacher that assigned me a poem to a strange boy, and I have to write a poem about him..AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW HIM!" By this time, I was all up in Court's face. Seriously upset at her. "Okay, that's nice, she said unevenly. "Whatever." Soon enough we rolled into the drive way. Court pulled her Guchi bag out of her car, and swung open the door, and slammed it. I looked up..such a drama queen. I slowly got out, and opened our "new" home door up. Court was already bringing out some a box of oreos, and some milk. Her's and mine favorite snack of all time. I went by her and grabbed one too. She slowly moved away and looked up,"I'm sorry, do you need something? Or are you gonna get all pissed at me again?" "Look Court, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get all ninja on you. I'm just all stressed with moving and school....and..dad. "...Mmmm it's all right Scarlet, I know you didn't mean too," she smiled faintly, "let's just pretend that didn't actually happen." "Fine with me," I smiled thankfully. Unlike me, Court forgave easily. "Good. So when are you gonna work with this kid? You know..this project.." "It's actually a poem..but his name is Darek. And I'm suppose to work with him on this poem, and we write what we think about this person..I don't even know him. So he's gonna come in and we are gonna...talk I guess." "Is he cute?" "Um..I guess," I smiled evenly. "Oooh, you like him don't you?" "I don't even know him!" "Uh huh." "Look..We just met and...." My voice trailed as the doorbell rang. OMG, he was here. "I got it!" screamed Court racing to the door. "I bet he's probably ugly and he's not even that..." Her voice trailed off as she opened the door, and stared right into the eyes of a boy with dark wavy long hair. A tall muscular body, and those dark eyes. "Hi," said Court flipping her hair into her eyes. Oh no..this was bad. Court flipped her hair into her eyes. She's moving her body closer to his, and licking her lips constantly. She only ever did this when she wanted something. And I know exactly what she wanted. She wanted Darek..the boy in my dreams..my boy. This was a surprise. A bad surprise. Smirks "ok well me and Darek are going to go ahead and work now on our poem," I said pointing out. Court just looked at me annoyingly, then she looked back and Darek and said,"You know after you two are done with your poem you should go ahead and eat dinner with us." She smiled with a flirt. I HATE you, I thought. "Well sure," Darek smiled softly his eyes smiling too, "as long as Scarlett or your mother don't mind?" He looked at me with a reasuring nod. "I'm sure that..." Then of course Court interupted my thoughts, again. "She won't mind," said Court smiling and touching his hand quickly and softly. That WHORE. I smiled tightly. I felt that if I said anything I would end up screaming at here to GO AWAY. Court smiled again, flipped her blonde hair, and walked with a hip bouncing back and forth. I thought of course he'd be checking her out by now. But he didn't, he was just looking at me and smiling down. "Shall we begin?" Darek asked. "Follow me." I lead him up our new winding up stairs into my bedroom. I kept the door opened because or a rule we had. No boys in the room unless the door is wide open. I opened up my room, a bit embarrased of all the boxes in my unattractive room. It had just unpainted walls and a twin bed with a shabby cloth laying as a blanket for me tonight. He sits down on the twin sized bed, and as he does the bed squeaks. Ugh, I hate this noise. I clench my eyes, and he looks at me funny. Did I do something? It looked as if he was gonna say. "Nothing just hate the noise." "Awe," he says,"well first things first..we need to get to know how we do stuff, and what we do and basically just chemistry about each other." Chemistry? Where the heck did this come in? "I mean how we do things," he repeated, as he did so he blused a little bit and the freckles on his skin scrunched, as he turned up his cute nose. I smiled at him laughingly, "OK babe" I joked, as I meant it. But when I said it, he just stared straight at me. No expression but a little laughter in his eyes. He came a bit closer to me, and sat right next to me. I could feel his jeans brushing my skin grazily. I felt something like a spark. I knew it sounded cheesy, but it was true. He smelt of vanilla and something heavingly that I couldn't put it together. Like cinnamon, darkness, heat,and bit of dark licorice. "I like the sky, nature, dark colors like your hair," he gestured," I also like the smell of grass right when you wake up and how it blossoms right into your nose. When someone looks at me I feel like they think I am something completely different than who I really am in the inside. When I see a baby cry, it makes me think of how I got abandoned at the age of nine when my single father was murdered right before my eyes. Or how I was left to watch my little sister, Lilah, until something...terrible happened to the both of us." I watched him silently as a tear flowered down his rose cheek. "I love how it feels to be up in the sky! And how it feels like everything you ever feared is down there, and nobody in the world can bother you." I felt so sad for him. He just shared lot with me. He was really open for just meeting me, maybe he felt the comfortable presence with each of us, just as I did, But it interested me about what happened that night..and did he fly an airplane or helicopter? "So you like fly airplanes or helicopters," I asked. "Not exactly.."Darek said. I was going to ask further questioning,but of course he gestured for me to say something. Maybe it was my turn for him to know about me. "I like the smell of..." "Coffee and gasoline," he finished for me. "How did you..know that?" I whispered. "You don't have to tell me stuff about you," he came up close to my ear. He got up and looked at the clock, it read 6:45 PM. "Time for dinner..." "It's only time for dinner when Court yells..." I pointed out. All of the sudden..another creepy thing happened. Court yelled that of course dinner was ready. How did the frick he know all these things! He started out of the room, and looked at me and asked,"You coming?" "Yeah.." He grabbed my hand, and pulled me with him to join dinner with my oh so wonderful "family". OMG, he was holding my hand. His hand was strong and held my tiny hand tightly. As we went down, he pulled the tiny wooden chair for me to sit in, in our tiny country dining room. "Thank you," I smiled. He smiled faintly and sat in the chair right next to me. My mom sat in front of me like usual, but instead of Court sitting next to Mom like usual, she sat on the left of Darek. She looked up and smiled. He smiled back lightly. Mom looked up at him and said,"Why aren't you a very handsome man?" "Mom!" I looked at her embarrassingly. "Well he is!" she smiled. "Just remember the door is alway going to be.." "Opened!" I said "I know." "Good. So what's your name?" She smiled at Darek big. "Darek...Ms. the food that you made is really delicious," Darek said, stuffing a bunch of mashed potatoes and Chicken into his mouth. "Well thank you! You know Scarlett used to eat a bunch basically piling a ton on her plate, but after Court said she would get fat and ugly eating that much," Mom looked at Court annoyingly, "she has not been eating that much!" "It's true if you eat too much though, Mom" Court said. "I just eat smaller portions," I argued, "and I eat fine." This was so embarrassing by now of course Court would be getting him, he'd feel all awkward and too weirded out by me. "I think you could never get fat," he said looking at me,"your too pretty." Did he really just say that? I could feel excitement flying up in my stomache. I looked over at Court, she had a dark expression on her face as if she was ready to kill someone. Ouch, serves you right though. After this Darek helped my mom with the dishes, and she kept pointing at him and whispering, that he was a keeper. I laughed, and he looked up at me and mom, and we just kept prentending nothing was happening. Later that evening, Darek got his backpack out of my "room". I walked him out to the door. "Is your ride here?" I asked. There was no car in sight. "I lost my dad remember?" "Don't you live with anyone?" He can't just not live by himself and be in highschool, and be able to pay for a backpack and stuff. "Yes, I do." I was going to ask who, but I felt a little to nosy. "So are you just gonna walk then?" "Maybe." "What is with the "maybes" or "not exactlys" He looked at me , smirked and quietly wondered into the streets. After 30 seconds of being stunned, I decided to go after him. I walked into the streets, but he wasn't there. How could he do that? It usually takes a guy or girl 7 minutes to walk out of this area because of how tight everything is. I decided to forget about it. As I walked out of the street, I all of the sudden had a flashback memory of a smirk that a certain boy gave me. I smirked back, and walked into our house. Locking the door, for no danger to come to us. Kiss me, babe Everything from after he left my house was perfectly fine...until I came back to school the next lovely day. Court got stupid Darek's number, and I found this out when I got out of her car. I saw Darek and rushed to him, only to be blocked out of the picture when Court bumped her hips right toward Darek. Darek just smiled polietly and didn't even pay attention to me when he was flirting with her. So I did what any independent woman would do, I walked away confidently. The next day, he still ignored me and now he was just sitting with Court at lunch. Every single frickin day he would seat with Court. When we went and anounced our poems, I went poured my poem to the class about him and sat down. I was patiently waiting to see what Darek would have written, but he never even got asked by Mr. Garret. Even after all the students had said what they thought about that person, Darek didn't even care to tell Mr. Garret he had forgotten about him. After that he just walked away and Court and him were talking again. She even poked his stomache and giggled about "how strong he was". Sure he was strong...cute...handsome...and so incredible sweet and geniune, but...I was just really pissed off! It had been three weeks by now and I was really just done with Darek. Every day at lunch or in the hallways Court and him would be all cute with each other and I was sick of it! I was surprised he hadn't even come over with Court to her bedroom of "FUN". I woke up this morning, and thought finally I had to be strong and confident and not always be so smoggled up with a guy. I would look really good today. I got dressed in some leather shorts sounded skanky, but if matched up in the right shirt and shoes did not! I slipped on a white low cut shirt and combat boots. Finally, I added a jean tight jacket ,and took a look in the mirror. Wow, I thought. I looked actually pretty good. I dialed Danny's number, no way would I go with Court to school any more with her acting like this with Darek, I rather go with my best friend Danny. Danny was always the sillest, nerdy girl ever, but I loved her. Around 8 a.m., she was finally here. Gosh, that girl took forever. "Good morning, babe! Sorry, my guinnea pig had extreme diarhea!" she joked from Jenna Marbles video's White Lies. "HAHA!" I said sarcastically,"well make sure ur guinnea pig doesn't do it again." "Sorry! Anyways... what's with you, hot mamma?" she gestured to my outfit. "Is it too much?" I was starting to get insecure with this outfit. "Too much for the boys" she winked," they'll be bonin' for yea!" "Oh gosh! That is seriously disgusting! I am scarred for life." "It's true!" "Just drive please," I laughed. We finally got to the school after listening to Never Shout Never. As I pulled up, we walked into the school, while idiots were playing with fire, and stoners and goths were spiking and smoking weed. I swear no one in this school gave a crap about what we did. They all started to look at me as I walked into the school gymnasium. I smiled, and they just smirked and winked their sunken eyes. As I walked in with Danny on my side, I saw Darek and Court flirting again. "Just ignore them," Danny said. I flipped my eyes in another direction, knowing that Darek hadn't even looked at me yet! Whatever. "I know Scarlet, that you shouldn't do this but...maybe you should make Darek jealous? Go to Noel?"said Danny "Noel?" I know Noel liked me, and he was really good looking and all, but nobody came down to hot with Mr. Garret or Darek in this school. Noel was flirting with a bunch of peppy freshman when I saw him. I really didn't want to go over there, but if it was too make Darek learn what he was missing. I wouldn't care. "Alright." I walked over to Noel, he was just a foot from Darek...and Court. "Hey Noel," I said innocently. He instantly turned to me and looked at me. He smiled and came closer towards me, totally ignoring the freshman. The freshman looked at me rude, and walked away. Obviously, going to gossip about me as they walked away. "Hello, Princess," he smirked. He started to call me this ever since I'd met him. "Hmm still like my nickname  I see." "Well, you are a princess aren't you? You sure look like one...no... more like a brunette version of Kate Upton, but less boob," he pointed. "Hm, I don't know whether I should be happy or disturbed." "Try both." "Okay, anyways I need to ask you for a favor." "Oh! I knew it was too good to be true. Princess, wouldn't just come up here and talk to me unless she wanted somthing," he said surrending his hands. "Look I said, will you pretend to be my boyfriend or whatever..." "Wow, wow, wow what? Boyfriend? I don't want to be anybody's boyfriend. I like being a man, and getting to choose what girl I want. One day I might want a brunette version of Kate Upton," he pointed at me," and the next day I might want a hot red head or a dumb blonde. You know what I mean?" "Okay, look if you do this, I'll pay you in cash." "As nice as that sounds...no, I already have a job, and getting money from a princess would be considered almost me as a thief."  I walked away, until he grabbed my arm. He looked at me and said," Unless...you tell me why you need to use me?" I hesitated, but grabbed his arm. I pulled him into the janitor room, as I did Darek looked in my direction. Score. "Because, Darek and I were reallly hitting it off, and now Court is getting in the way of that. She always is doing this to me ,and I need your help." "Court? The hot blonde?" "Yes." Great, already feeling worse. "No competition. You are way better looking." I smiled almost about to blush. Did he really just say that? No one had ever said that to me before. I mean I didn't want to sound like one of those friends that once someone says the girl compared to the girl that gets more guys is prettier and get all excited, but I couldn't help it. "My opinion," he said "brunettes are always more attractive to me." "So...?" "Fine, but conditions..." he said smiling " I get to makeout with you anytime I want to unless you are sick, second I get to hold your hand, and third you have to cook me dinner every Friday at my house." "Every Friday? I have plans! And makeout anytime you want? Wouldn't I get mono from you?" "Well, for your information I don't have mono, and second of all I'm a great kisser! And the dinner is way better then what I was gonna say about how you would dress in my presence." "Fine. This can start after we are out of this closet." As we get out, all these students look at us, including Darek. He just stared at me. Noel looked just estatic. "That was great babe thanks for that,"he looked at me and kissed my cheek. I was about to slap him, but remembering our plan. I leaned in and kissed his lips. He looked surprised that I was already going in for this. Then he saw Darek, and kissed me back leaning into me hard and holding my lower back. Noel was a really good kisser, his lips were really soft and when I kissed him I felt like I was eating chocolate. He smiled at me, and I smiled back. Oh gosh, I already started to like him a little. As he grabbed my hand, I felt Darek staring straight at me. I glanced back, but he wasn't looking at me. He was looking straight at Noel, really pissed off. But I didn't care. "Kiss me, babe," I said to Noel. He obeyed gladly.       I just came to say hello    I was in English AP class later on after Noel and I had become "officially dating". Are plan was working out really well actually. Darek seemed to be really paying attention to the both of us, and looking at us meanly. The only problem was he seemed to get more into my sister, when I went all cutie with Noel. We were working today in English about some dude named Arthur that made a famous English book that made something. Wasn't really sure, kept zoning out every two seconds. Only problem was that Darek and I were sitting by eachother...it was sorta awkward because he kept glancing at me. All of the sudden Mr. Garret looked at me with his pierced eyes. "Scarlet, would you like to tell us something famous or exciting that has happened to you like it had to Mr. Arthur?" What kind of question was that? Why would he want to know that? Also, why would he want me to even share this with the whole class? Ah, teachers. "Uhhhh." Think Scarlet. Think. What the heck is something excititng that has happened to you? "Probably, when I made chocolate cookies, and they tasted really good." Really Scarlet? The whole class started to giggle. Except Darek. "Well, that's nice, Scarlet..." said Mr. Garret," anyways go ahead and study for your pop quiz you have five minutes to work on it." Pop quiz? Great, just another thing for me to worry about. I pulled out my book and started going over vocab words and things. Darek looked at me and I just stared at him. "Yes?" I said. He just looked at me and said nothing and went back to studying. Really, your such a douche, I thought. He looked at me as I thought that, and just sighed. Did he hear me say that? No, it's not like he could read minds I mean lets be serious this isn't Edward and Bella. I finally just had enough of this, and was about to burst out of tears. I never had ever done this except when I found out my Dad was leaving my mom and us for a YOUNGER woman. "Can I go to the bathroom?" I said loudly to Mr. Garret. Mr. Garret looked at me and other students heads turned toward mine own. "Can you wait til after the quiz?" he said nicely, but once he saw my eyes he looked at me interestingly and sighed okay. I ran out of the room, not even caring about looking at Darek. I ran to the football field, and ran up to the bleachers and cried with my face in my knees. This actually felt really good to get out. I just kept pouring out my tears until I had no more to cry. You could just here me sobing lightly over and over again. I looked at my phone and realized I had been gone about 20 minutes. No one really takes that long unless they're taking a dump. I giggled lightly to myself and drunkly stumbilingly came down the bleachers tripping a few times. I walked slowly across the field, and went to the bathroom. When I got there, I realized that most of my makeup was dripping. I got some toliet paper, and dried it up trying to look presentable. I realized my outfit was okay, and I shouldn't be so focused on my looks. It was ruining me. I looked down, and realized I had a huge bloody cut on my ankle that I hadn't noticed. Probably when I came down the bleachers. I tried to get some paper towels to clean it up, but it kept on bleeding. I grabbed a ton on paper towels, and just held onto it while walking back into Mr. Garrets classroom. I knew I should probably hurry, realizing I took half an hour. I walked into Mr.Garrets classroom, all eyes on me as I weridly walked in. "I don't know where she is!" yelled Mr. Garret into the phone," she had to go to the bathroom and she's not back yet. Yes, yes it's been half and hour." I didn't realize how embarrassing this was until I said, "Um, I'm right here, Sir." Mr. Garret looked over towards me quickly. His eyes looked very bulgy but settled after he glanced at me. He told the person on the phone he found me and hung up. "Scarlet, why were you taking so long? I was scared. What happened to your ankle?" I looked down and realized the paper towels had again soakin down in blood. I must've looked crazy. "Oh um...I tripped." "How did you trip that bad? Somebody must've hurt you?" he looked fiercely. "Who did this to you?" "No one I  swear, I just tripped. It's fine, really." "I doubt it...okay, but if you feel like really telling me the actual truth I'm here," he said very generously "now go take your quiz with the other students." I sat down next to Darek and took the pop quiz which was surprisingly easy, I thought. After I finished it, I handed it in, luckily not the last student to be done with the quiz. I sat back down with Darek. He looked at me, and kept looking at me. "Are you okay?"he said to me finally saying something to me. "Oh," I whispered,"so now you're going to talk to me." "Well, it's kinda hard when you're all over Noel," he muttered. "What about my sister? Huh? Don't act like your all innocent." "I don't like your sister in that way, she's just a friend. "Just a friend...complete bullcrap, you hardly even talk to me anymore and you always ignore me." He sighed and said,"You wouldn't understand." The bell rang and he picked up his stuff, and started to walk away. I followed him close behind. I grabbed the back of his jacket, and said,"The only thing YOU don't understand is that I reallly actually sorta liked you, and now that your off being a complete jerk your not worth it. I don't even understand why  I liked you or said any of those good things about you in the poem. Because honestly, you don't deserve those words, and I take them all back." All sorts of students looked at us, as I walked away into the back of the school. I came outside, and all of the sudden Darek looked at me. "I really do like you Scarlet, but you need to know that I can't be with you right now and they're are reasons why," he said as he looked off in Mr.Garret's direction. "If you want to know..."he murmerd softly," then meet me in the fileds tonight around 9." He kissed me in that second, and it was even better than Noel. It had compassion and love, all the things I was yearning for. He lips were deathly soft, I smiled as we kissed. All the sudden he walked away, and disappeared, while I just stood stunned. Then I looked over and saw Mr.Garret staring death eyes at me.. Publication Date: April 14th 2013 https://www.bookrix.com/-mysterygurl4eva
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-jasmine-banks-a-new-storm-is-brewing/
jasmine banks A New Storm Is Brewing chapter forever ~ J' Kai~ The alarm goes off,I guess it's time to wake up I hit the button and turn of my morning song. It's the first day of my freshmen year in high school lets see how it goes._Gerad_ ok another year another school lets see how many girls I can get to fall for me here. -D'Lante- aite time to get ready for freshman year gotta mak sure nobody gone take my place as the finest boy in my class. ~J'Kai~ hop off the bus ready for a new day a new year and hopefully a fresh start in 2009._Gerad_ hop out my borther's ride and already got them girls looking! WOW who is that girl that just got off the bus? she is smokin' hot!~D'Lante~ dang! look at all these girls! why aint dey looking back at me? who is this kid that they checking out? oh well it dont matter as long as J'Kai not looking at him its all good. New Relationship J'Kai got to her first period early enough to see exactly who would be in her class. Soon as she sat on her desk and waited for people a tall handsome young caramel skin man with the body like no other. she realizes she is staring and he is just chucklingshe blushes and looks away. Hey, I'm Gerad whats your name? "I'm J--j--j--" blushes, "i'm J'Kai" and there at the door is my best friend De'Lante" Gerad turns around and see's De'Lante. they just look at each other with cruel looks like they're already having a show down over who will rule this class. the teacher walks in and we now realize the whole class has been staring at us so we sit down and start to pay attention. even though we don't really listen. De'lante keeps texting me and he is almost getting my phone taken. 3 weeks later Ready For a New Thing today De'Lante isn't here but it doesnt really bother me because i get to talk to Gerad mater of fact here he is now hey G!screamed J'Kai Hey Kai... i want to ask you something. said Gerad ok spill ok... I know that I've only known you for about 3 weeks but I have grown to like you and i wanted to know if you would like to be my girl? "Of course i will!" J'Kai screamed with excitement "ehem i mean sure.. but how will i tell de'Lante?" you dont have to true i dont so i wont the next second she got a txt from De'Lante he said he wont be here at this school anymore right then th eworld shades changed from green and blue and beautiful colors to a light yet dark shade of gray. Never thought this would hurt me like it did. the test It's been a few months since i last saw De'Lante. we finally going to see each other at his house. i just have to take his bus over there... hope Gerad dont get mad at this im about to tell him. hey babe... whats up? Gerad said nothing today after school im going to De'Lante's though oh ok just dont be doing nothing that only we would do. haha no worries ill see u later ok later ... at De'lante's house hey!! haven't seen you in forever! i screamed soon as i saw De'lante haha yeah i know right well come on lets watch a movie ok ... after the movie is over wow this movie was soo crazie! exclaimed De'Lante haha thats the truth but what time is it? its about... 5 o'clock oh... i have time to kill, mater of fact its friday night! what else can we do? hmmm lets listen to some music for a little bit okay that's cool what song first? how about bedrock? haha sure call me mrs. flinstone i can make your bedrock! hmmpph bet you cant! said De'lante was that a challenge? i questioned yeah it is. aite time and place lets go! haha ok.. right now... upstairs my room oh okay! i yelled go get ready you know what room is mine go ahead okay no prob. ... in De'Lante's room De'Lante you sure you still want to do this? i mean i dont know if you can hadle this aww wats wrong kai? u afraid that u cant do it? De'lante said in a husky voice backing me into a wall. i look up kiss him intensily he picks me up and puts my legs around his waist, waiting for more but instead i just get off of him and try to walk to the door but i don't get very far De'Lante stops me pulls me and turns me around. he kisses my neck and the kisses send chills down my spine. im grinding on him getting slow moments of pleasure he puts his hands on my butt squeezing it. getting low moans from me he walks backwards to his bed, lays me down on top of him. then my phone rings and its Gerad's ringtone. we stop and calm our breathing De'Lante gets up and curses then i realize what i was doing. i make some excuse and leave. /i barely madde it out of there without being caught in my lie. the truth I told my friend Asillet what me and De'Lante did. She got so wide eyed and was like you need to tell Gerad what happened before the word gets out and he's even madder at you! i told her i was to afraid of what he would say, then she threatened to tell him if i didnt do it tonight... this is how it went. ... on the phone ~texting~ to: Gerad <3 hey i have to tell you something that happened on friday to: J'Kaiboo ok spill whats up? To: Gerad <3 on friday me and De'Lante almost did something... it wasn't on purpose it was because of a song... and he bet i couldnt do something i had to prove him wrong i just had to to: J'Kaiboo WTF!! HOW COULD YOU? WHAT WHERE YOU THINKING HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?! TO: Gerad <3 i didnt mean to it was an accident i wasn't susposed to happen. To: J'Kaiboo just stop jus dont talk to me dont talk to me right now. ~phone~ Brinnnng brinnnng brinnnng Gerad: hello? Jkai: hey boo Gerad: bye Janice (gerads little sister: janice: hey Kai! my brothers very mad at you i wish he would stop though Jkai: Hey Janice can you tell him im so very sorry and i love him for me please? Janice: sure no problem Jkai: thanks your awesome Janice: he said he loves you to but let him think for a little bit and he'll call you later ok? Jkai: ok no problem *hangs up* Dear lord, please forgive me for i have sinned and lord please let him forgive me as well. you know i never meant to disobey your commands nor make him loose his trust n me but please let us work this out in jesus name AMEN ~the next day~ .after the football game. Gerad! I screamed Gerad! Yeah? he answered can i talk to you without you being mad at me? Sure, whatever ok look im sorry it wasn't susposed to happen i just i just let my dare-devil-ness to get in the way of my brain and my heart. but i realized what i was doing and that it was wrong... can i atleast get points up because i came clean with what i did instead of letting you hear it through someone else okay, I'll give you your points for telling me but im still kindah mad that you did that in the first place! ok im sorry but you know how i get when someone dares me... i just cant back down! ok... you're right im stil kind of shakey on my trust but you all good now but that boy de'Lante he got another thing comming if he ever try to step to you again its going to be me and him fist to fist no talking necessary! haha ok Gerad just know that this begins our chapter Forever Publication Date: August 15th 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-jasminelove13ifye
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-nobuyuki-akiyama-kuroshitsuji-yaoi-love/
Nobuyuki Akiyama Kuroshitsuji Yaoi Love Chapter 1 Ciel's POV   "It's time for you to wake up Ciel" I woke up to the voice of Alois Trancy, right next to me, "I don't remember falling asleep in your mansion Trancy" I muttered as I sat up then realized that it was my bed, "that's because you didn't, I came over for a visit today, but you weren't awake so Sebastian let me wake you up this morning" he grinned, I watched him and found myself, slightly smiling, "huh? Ciel are you smiling?" Trancy's eyes widened and he climbed on top of me to get a better look, I dropped my face to hide the blush that was now all over my face from how close he was, "no, I'm not, now get off me" I pushed him off, got out of bed and went over to my wardrobe, I got out a pair of blue jeans, a white shirt and a blue hoodie, I tried to keep my eye with the contract mark closed so Alois wouldn't see it, after I was dressed I tried to put my eyepatch on by myself but it didn't work out that well, in the end Alois ended up tying it for me, "why do you wear an eyepatch Ciel?" Alois asked me, I walked out of my room without answering his question, "Sebastian?!" I called as I sat down in the living room, "yes master?" my butler asked me as he was putting his gloves back on, though unfortunately, Alois seen his contract mark, "what is that Ciel?" Alois asked me pointing at Sebastian's contract mark, "that's a tattoo, he got recently, isn't that right Sebastian?" I glared at Sebastian then got up and dragged Sebastian away from Alois, "he doesn't know about demons nor that you are one, nor that I have a contract with you, he just thinks that my parents hired you before they died so just don't give anything away got that?" I asked and walked back to Alois and sat down next to him again, "now Sebastian, about what I called you out here for..." I started, "yes master?" Sebastian just smirked so I gathered that he knew what I was going to ask him, "... why in all of hell would you let Alois wake me up this morning, and why would you even let him stay here if I wasn't awake yet anyway?!" I shouted at Sebastian, but he didn't even seem fazed by my little outburst, Alois on the other hand had curled up and was hiding his face in his knees, "Alois, I wasn't yelling at you this time so you don't need to be scared" I said softly surprising all of us, including myself, "Ciel..." Alois started crying and threw his arms around my neck pushing us both to the ground, "Alois?!" I shouted startled as I was pushed to the ground by the older boy, I wrapped one arms around his waist and petted his head with the other to try and calm him down, when he finally stopped crying he tried to get up but I held him closer to me. Chapter 2 Alois's POV   I was extremely surpsrised when Ciel suddenly pulled me back down to him when I tried to get up, "Ciel.. w-what are you doing?" I stuttered, burying my face in his chest, he moved his hand from my head to my waist with his other hand and he stood up bringing me with him though now I was taller than him and his head was now buried in my chest, "Sebastian, could we have some food in Ciel's room?" I asked and picked Ciel up bridal style, "of course Alois" Sebastian bowed and went back into the kitchen, I took Ciel into his room and laid him down on his bed, I tried to get up and leave the room but Ciel wouldn't let go of my waist, "stay with me for a while?" Ciel muttered and pulled me back onto the bed, "okay Ciel" I layed down next to him and put my arms around his waist and put my head on his head and fell asleep myself. - the next day, still Alois's POV - I woke up and seen that Ciel was still asleep, I tried to get up but he didn't seem to have loosened his grip on me at all while he was asleep, "Ciel, Ciel you have to wake up now" I said quietly shaking the younger boy next to me, "hnn, good morning Alois" he muttered rubbing his eyes against my hand, I giggled and sat us up in his bed, "how are you feeling today?" I asked taking my hand away from his eyes and petting his head with it, "better, and warm" he smiled and hugged me again, "is something wrong Ciel?" I asked pulling him away from me a bit so I could see his face, he was still smiling though, "I think I'm falling in love with you Alois" he leant up and kissed me suddenly which made me gasp but I kissed him back none-the-less, when he finally pulled back I was shocked and happy at the same time, "I love you too Ciel" I smiled and kissed him again, he immediately kissed me back, I smiled against his lips, he ran his tongue over my bottom lip which made me gasp, he used that time to slip his tongue inside my mouth, our tongues danced together and I won in our little fight for dominance, I layed us down on the bed so I was on top of Ciel, "I want to go further than this" Ciel muttered as we both pulled back for air, "not yet" I smiled and carressed his cheek, "why not? I want you Alois" he groaned and leaned into my hand, "because you're twelve years old Ciel, I'm not taking your virginity when you're twelve" I said and pulled my hand away to which he pouted at me, "please Alois" he begged me, "no, not until you're older" I got off the bed, "I'm not going to kiss you again until you stop asking to have sex with me Ciel" I left the room and closed the door behind me, "Alois?" Sebastian asked as I walked into the kitchen, "you might want to give Ciel something sweet soon" I said as I got a bottle of water from the fridge, "why, what happened?" he asked as he poured some of the water into a cup and put the bottle back, he handed me the cup, "he wants to go further but I said that I wouldn't until he was older, so now he is really mad at me" I said sitting up on the bench and watching Sebastian put decorations on a cake, "what's the cake for?" I blinked at the cake then at Sebastian, "Ciel's birthday is tomorrow, so I'm making a cake for him because he said he wanted one this birthday" he said as he finished putting the decorations on and put the cake in the fridge, "do you think it would be a wise idea for me to come over on his birthday, considering what happened between us not that long ago" I said and got off the counter, I put the cup in the sink and was about to leave the kitchen, "I think it would be better for him, if you were there" he said as I left the room, I walked up the stairs and into Ciel's room when I heard crying, "what's wrong Ciel?" I asked rushing over to his bed and putting my arms around his waist and pulling him into a hug, we stayed like that until he stopped crying finally after half an hour, "why were you crying Ciel?" I asked him again, "because you left me all alone" he said, "oh Ciel, I would never leave you alone, I promise" I pulled him into a kiss and I felt him smile against my lips, I ran my tongue over his bottim lip and he opened his mouth, I slipped my tongue into his mouth and explored every inch of it, he moved so he had a leg on either side of me and he was sitting on my lap, "why don't you want to go further Alois?" he asked me when we pulled back for air, "it's not that I don't want to go further with you Ciel, it's just that I don't want you to be mad if you don't like it, that's all" I said trying to ignore the fact that Ciel was grinding against me trying to get me to give in, "I promise I won't get mad at you if I don't like it, just please I want you so bad Alois" he started begging me again, "alright fine we can go further tomorrow tonight okay, as a birthday present to you" I said and kissed him again, "mhmm" he agreed against the kiss. Chapter 3 Ciel's POV   - the next day - I woke up with Alois's arms around my waist, I smiled and kissed him on the nose to wake him, "hnn, good morning and happy birthday Ciel" he whispered in my ear as he got up out of bed, "do you remember your promise to me yesterday Alois?" I grinned at him, "I'm not sure maybe you should remind me" he said smirking, "you said that tonight we could go further, as a birthday present to me" I said still grinning, "that's right I did say that didn't I" he said and tapped my nose, then he pulled me out of bed and after we got dressed, he took me downstairs, we sat on the couch in the living room, while waiting for breakfast to be ready, a few moments later, Sebastian came in with two plates of bacon and eggs on toast. - later that night, still Ciel's POV - After dinner and cake Alois and I went up to my bedroom, "are you sure you want to do this Ciel?" Alois asked me when we got inside my room and the door was closed, "yes I want you Alois" I said and kissed him, we were in the middle of my room, Alois picked me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist, he carried me over to the bed and layed me down so he was on top of me, he undid the buttons on my shirt and threw it to the ground, he started kissing my neck, I moaned from the feeling, I flipped us over so I was on top, he pulled me down into a kiss, I undid the buttons on his shirt and pulled it off and dropped it on the ground with mine, he unzipped his jeans then pulled them off so he was now just in his boxers, I unzipped my jeans and dropped them on the floor so I was also only in my boxers, we pulled our boxers off, we were both naked now, I wanted to do something but I didn't know what "um Alois I have no idea what to do" I muttered he smiled and pushed me down "here i'll show you" he said moving his lips over my penis I gasped and moaned his name he moved one hand in between my thighs more and started playing with the other part I blushed deeply and bit my lip to stop another moan he kept going for a few moments before I moaned loudly and he pulled away swallowing something before crawling up the bed to kiss me "your mouth tastes different" I said before doing to him the same as he did to me the only difference was I pulled away when white stuff came out of his penis so it ended up landing on my bed "sorry I didn't think i'd come so quickly" he said "it's fine" I said going back up to him "do you want to try something new" he asked I nodded "lay down on your stomach" he said, I did as I was told a few seconds later I felt him push into my butt I moaned loudly as he pulled out before pushing back in he did that for a bit before getting faster my moans were increasing in volume and I was a little afraid that Sebastian was going to come in he pulled out and I felt something warm on my back I sat up and look around at him "that was weird" I said he nodded "it always is on your first time" he replied "can I try" I asked he nodded again and laid down the same way I had been I put on leg either side of him I used my hands to spread his butt cheeks before I slowly pushed into him he quietly moaned into the pillow I pulled out a bit before thrusting my hips forward again burying myself in him again I kept doing it like that until I got a bit more confidence and got a little faster I groaned as I felt pressure building up in my lower abdomen and then it was gone I pulled out and he sat up "you came in me" he pointed out "I didn't mean to just one moment I felt funny and then the next I was fine" I said starting to panic "Ciel it's fine don't worry about it but I do have something to ask you" he said I nodded and sat up "will you be my boyfriend" he asked quietly I nodded and leaned forward to kiss him again. Chapter 4 Claude's POV   "Claude?!" my mother called out from the kitchen in the mansion, "coming mom" I called out as I closed my laptop where I had been talking to a friend at my collage, I walked into the kitchen where my mother was cooking dinner for us all, "Claude didn't Alois go over to that other boy's house?" my father asked walking in, "yeah he should've been back already though, is something wrong?" I asked sitting down on the edge of the counter, "yes he hasn't come back yet and it's been three days, would you be able to go and get him please Claude?" my mother asked trying to push me off the counter, "yeah sure, and mom don't try to push me off the counter, you already know it won't work" I grinned at her then walked out and went back to my room to tell my friend that I had to go out but I would be back soon, "bye" I called out as I left the house. - about half an hour later at the phantomhive mansion, still Claude's POV - "Hello, is anyone here?" I called out as I knocked on the door, a few moments later a tall guy in a butler's uniform answered the door, so it took me a few moments for me to recognize him, "Sebastian?!" I was entirely shocked, "Claude?!, what are you doing here?" he asked as he let me inside, "I came to pick up my brother, Alois remember, I told you about him at school" I said just as Alois came out with another boy that looked about thirteen, "Claude?!, what are you doing here?" he answereed as he came running over to me and hugged me, "mom and dad were worried so they sent me to come and pick you up" I answered hugging him back, "who's this?" I pointed to the other boy, "this is my boyfriend Ciel Phantomhive" he said grinning and waving him over, "hello, it's nice to meet you" Ciel said and bowed, "you don't have to bow, you're practically family now" I said and hugged him, "Ciel, this is my older brother Claude Faustus, I'm his foster brother so that's why we don't have the same last name" Alois scratched the back of his neck sheepishly and blushed when Ciel smiled at him, "so, why exactly haven't you come back home for the past three days Alois?" I asked raising an eyebrow at Alois, "I've been busy lately" he said grinning at Ciel, "oh, so that's why you keep blushing everytime Ciel smiles at you" I said realizing, "anyway Claude, how do you know Sebastian?" Alois asked pointing between me and Sebastian, "we go to the same collage" Sebastian answered putting his arm around my shoulder and grinning, "get off me asshole" I sneered, "oh, you hurt me with your words Claude" Sebastian said sarcastically, "good, then it's working" I replied, "god, those two should just kiss and make up right about now" Ciel and Alois said at the same time while walking away from us, "hell no, I think I hate this guy" I shouted to them, "well Sebastian is gay and he obviously likes you so sorry but you're stuck with him forever Claude" Ciel turned around and grinned at me then ran off with Alois, "hell no" I muttered under my breath, "actually I'm sure my father would approve" Sebastian said poking his tongue out at me, "who's your father?" I asked curious, "Satan" he gave me a peace sign with his fingers, "what the fuck dude?!" I yelled and punched him in the arm, "yeah sorry for not telling you even after we got paired up for that project at school" he looked down at the ground and rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, "oh go fuck each other already?!" Ciel and Alois suddenly walked into the room, "be careful master, you don't want that to sound like an order to me do you?" Sebastian asked Ciel, "yes actually I do..." Ciel started then smirked, "Sebastian, this is an order... have sex with Claude" then they ran off, "oh dear Claude, you really are in trouble now... I can't disobey a direct order from my master" he pulled off one of his gloves to show his contract mark, "fuck me" I said and pulled off my jacket and gloves, then I went upstairs, "I'm not screwing you in the living room Sebastian, your room, now" I said and stood there waiting for him to take me to his room, once we were in his room I put my things on his bed and sat down, I looked around his room and seen a lot of posters of cats, "so I gather you like cats do you Sebastian?" I asked texting my mom that I was staying over here with Alois for a bit longer, "yes I do" he said and climbed on top of me as soon as I put my phone on his bedside table, he suddenly kissed me, though I hated him I still automatically kissed him back, he traced my bottom lip with his tongue and I granted him entrance, our tongues fought for dominance and unfortunately for me, he won, he pushed me down onto his bed and pulled back just long enough to pull my t-shirt over my head and put it with my jacket and gloves, "someone's impatient" I said right before Sebastian crashed his lips to mine again, I undid his tie, and took off his shirt and coat and put them with my clothes, "what do you want Sebastian, top or bottom?" I asked as we were pulling off our pants and boxers, "top, you don't mind do you?" he asked sarcastically, "you don't really care what I think in this scenario, so why should I answer that?" I asked laying on my stomach and grabbing my phone to play tetris, "is playing that at school not enough for you Claude?" Sebastian asked me as he pushed inside me, I bit my lip to stop myself from moaning out in pleasure, "what's wrong Claude? why did you just bite your lip?" he asked as he thrust into me again, "you're fucking huge that's what, and I died in tetris" I said just as I died again in tetris, after about three more hours of him fucking me and me dying in tetris, "well why don't you stop playing it then?" Sebastian suggessted as he thrust into me again and came inside me, "well that was fun" I said and was about to put my clothes back on, "wait a minute Claude, you haven't done anything yet have you?" Sebastian asked as he stood in front of me, "no and I don't want to, your master ordered you to have sex with me and you have so I can leave now, so bye see you at school on monday" I commented and pulled all our clothes towards me as I couldn't get past Sebastian and his huge cock, "can you move? I can't get my gloves with you standing there" I said pointing past him to my fingerless gloves on the other side of his bed, "alright fine, but you have to let me give you some fun as well" he pointed to my dick with his eyes, "why? and how?" I asked curious now, "I'm not fucking you in the ass if that's what you're talking about" I quickly said as I picked up my phone because my mom was calling me, "hey mom, what's up?" I asked as I put one finger in front of my lips telling him to be quiet, instead he just knelt down in front of me and gabbed me gently, he licked my shaft then took me whole, I was shocked so I automatically gasped, "huh? what's wrong Claude?" my mom asked on the other end of the phone, "no mom, nothing's wrong, I was just shocked at something" I glared at Sebastian but he just smirked around me, "okay well we just wanted to see how you were, so are you going to be staying the night, now that we know you and Alois are safe we don't mind if you want to stay over at your friends house" my mom said and I could actually hear her smiling, "okay thanks mom" I said and hung up the phone, "are you having fun there Sebastian" I looked down at him, I hadn't even realized that I had came but he was licking me clean and smiling, "yes" he stood up and got my gloves from the other side of the bed and handed to me then kissed me again, I kissed him back and after a few moments we pulled away sith a string of saliva connecting our lips, "are you sure you hate me Claude?" Sebastian asked me smirking, "no, god I love you" I said and crashed my lips to his again, after about half an hour more of kissing we finally got dressed, when I was putting my gloves back on, "I wonder if my mom would let me and Alois move in with you guys?" I asked Sebastian and he just looked at me and grinned, "you would really ask them?" he asked me, "yeah, I will in a minute" I said picking up my phone to text my mom, "she said yes" I said putting my phone back into my pocket, "good, now I have a question for you Claude?" Sebastian sat down next to me and laid his head on my lap and looked up at me, "yeah what is it Sebastian?" I asked looking down at him past my phone which I was playing tetris on again, "will you be my boyfriend?" he mumbled just loud enough for me to hear, "hell yeah dude" I said and kissed him. Chapter 5 Sebastian's POV   - the next day - "well that's the last of it" Claude said as he moved the last box inside the Phantomhive mansion, "wow that's a lot of stuff Claude" I heard Alois say as he walked over to one that had his name on it, "is this my computer and playstation or my tablet, ipad, ipod, and macbook?" he asked as he looked at it, "pc and ps, the one next to it is the other stuff" Claude moved the two boxes he was pointing to barely away from the others, "and the one over here is all of you cords for everything" he said taking another box over to them, "hasn't my xbox come yet?" Alois whined, "no I don't think it has yet, if you want I can go and get it, I mean you have all the cords and controllers for it so it won't be very heavy" Claude suggessted, "do you mind if I come with you Claude?" I asked wrapping my arms around my boyfriends waist and pulling him back towards me, "sure, I don't see why not, and will you stop that?" he asked as I was kissing his neck, "no, I will not, it's fun watching and feeling you squirm like this" I said against his neck, I gently sucked on his pulse point to leave a mark, "oh my fucking god Sebastian, did you just give me a hickey?!" Claude turned around in my arms and pushed his arms against my chest a bit so he could see my face, I just smirked at him as a reply, "fuck you Bastian" he mumbled, "only if you offer" I whispered in his ear to which he just smirked at me then walked out of my arms and towards the front door, "anyway we'll be back in a little while" I said waving to the younger boys and winking. Ciel's POV "did he just wink at us?" I asked as I followed Alois into the kitchen, where he started cooking something, "I don't really know I wasn't paying attention to him" he said looking through the fridge and pulling out some ingredients, "can I go play a game on your pc?" I asked kissing Alois's cheek, "sure Ciel, it's in our bedroom" he quickly pecked me on the lips and smiled at me, "thanks Alois" I called out as I went upstairs, I walked into mine and Alois's bedroom which used to be my bedroom, I walked over to the computer and turned it on but it had to install updates, so I decided to take a shower while waiting, "Alois, I'm going to take a quick shower" I called out the door, "ok just give me a sec and I'll finish washing the dishes" he called back and a few moments later I heard the water stop downstairs, "all good" he called back to me and I went to have my shower. Sebastian's POV Claude had shown me around the entire mansion and I had met both his parents now, "I like your mansion Claude" I said as I sat down on Alois's old bed while Claude tried to find his younger brothers xbox, Editing: Sarah Daniels Publication Date: September 7th 2017 https://www.bookrix.com/-qo1b5606c031a95
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-chalen-d-decisions/
Chalen D. Decisions i live in proverty. My mom has a job, working her ass off while her curent husband lies around, while i try to help his and her's four new kids. i'm seveenteen. i graduated school early cause i knew mom was going to need help. owen is 13, darralynn is 8, blake is 4 and haylie is two. we live in a three bedroom house. my mom's name is jace and she does everything that she can to help them. when i got the mail today i got a letter from my dad. i never knew my dad. when mom was sixteen she got pregnant and moved. I never had contact with him. the gist of the letter was him telling me he always tried to find me, and that he wants me to come live with him. he included pictures of his house, pool and husky, mia. he told me i could have whatever i wanted. of course when i told mom this she freaked. "no, your family needs you." she said. "yeah, i know, but maybe i can just go visit and get a job. if i get a good job then i can move you guys." i said. that sentence is how i landed myself in the air port. "listen to me. don't let them make you feel guilty. keep up with your grades, ok?" i told owen. he nodded and i hugged him. "i'm coming back for you," i said, hugging daralynn. "no more tears love." i told her holding back mine. it felt like a ball of guilt was stuck in my throat but i knew i had to do this. she nodded. "hey. remember stay strong. make me proud." i said. she smiled, and we hugged again. blake hugged my moms leg. i bent down to him. his face was tear shreaked. "don't leave me," he said. "i'm going to get money. i can take you to disneyland, and get you ice cream." i said. i brushed back his hair. "would you like that?" i asked. he nodded. "i'm going to call you every single night." i told him. he laughed, and hugged me. i kissed his forehead. i hugged haylie and then turned to my mom. "stay strong i'm coming back. i know this is the right thing." i said. "i know baby." she said, touching my cheek. she pulled me in for a hug. i waved goodbye, and walked to the terminal. "bye," joe said. "get a job." i said, not turning back. i met my dad in the luage claim. "you look like your aunt, i'm going to have some big problems." he said. he smiled, and pulled me into a hug. "is this all you have?" he asked. i nodded. "we'll have to change that." he said. i set my things on my bed and sat down. the sky was an agry gray and all i should think of is if this was the right thing. i grabed a phone and opened the baywindow, letting in the sent of rain, which always calmed me. i sat on the bench and called my mom. "no!" she said. "hello?" she asked. "hey." i said. "haylie, no. blake leave her alone." she said. "let me talk to blake." i said. "it's your sister." she said. i heard a shuffling noise and blake came on. "zoey?" he asked. "i'm here." i said. "when are you coming home?" he asked. i laughed. "it's been three hours." i said. "i miss you." he said. "i'm working on the money." i told him. "if you want ice cream you have to be a good boy for mommy. do you think you can do that, fo me?" i said. "yes zoey." he said. "good." i said. "owen's picking on me." he said. "put owen on the phone." i said. whatever he's told you it's a lie zoey." he said. "so you aren't picking on him?" i asked. "ok maybe a little." he said. "owen, come on i'm counting on you. if you help me out here, i'll get you something." i said. "a guitar?" he asked. "you got it." i said. "with an amp?" he asked. "yes. now be nice, and put daralynn on the phone." i said. "zoey?" he asked. "yeah?" i asked. "i love you." he said. "i love you owen." i said. "i miss you too." he said. the ball of guit came back. "i miss you to buddy, just stay strong i'm coming back." i said. "k. here she is." he said. "zoey! i miss you so much! how's hollywood? any cute boys? where's the hot spots? see any famous people yet? what's your dad like? are you having fun with out me?" she rambbled. "daralynn." i said. "sorry." she said. "it's okay. i miss you too, and iv'e been in town ten minuets, i don't know too much about my dad, and no i could never have fun with out you." i said. "i need to count on you to help out with haylie." i said. "sure thing." she said. "i'll get you a present." i said. "what?" she asked. "i don't know what do you want?" i asked. "um. what about an outfit?" she asked. "you got it doll. i love you." i said. " i love you too." she said. "zoey!" haylie said. " hi haylie, sissy's going to get you a dolly ok?" i said. "a dolly!?" she asked. "yep. and a storller." i said. "yay!" she said. "i love you." i said. "i love you!" she said. my mom came on. "how's hollywood?" she asked. "ok so far, and it's so not sunny here." i said. she laughed. "oh i miss you already." she said. "i love you mom." i said. "i love you too honey," she said. "oh joe has a job interview." she said. it started to sprinkel. "about time." i said. "i know right." she said. "well i'm glad to hear everythings going fine." i said. "it is." she said. "i'm going to look for a job tomorrow." i said. "oh, honey, you just got there have some fun!" she said. "fun? what happened to the mom six hours ago, when you didn't even want me going?" i asked. "i realize that i was being unfair.she said. i looked up to see a man. "Mistress zoey, dinner will be ready in five minutes." he said. "thanks." i said. he left. "i'll let you go, gotta make dinner for the kids." she said. "haylie don't you touch that." she warned. "i love you mom." i said." i love you to sweety." she said. we hung up and i went down stairs. i found the dinning room and sat down. once i was served dad walked in. "sorry." he said. "it's fine." i said. "so how's your life?" he asked. "good." i said. "i'm going to give you analowance. all you have to do is try to have some kind of fun. i'm going to give you ten million a month." he said. i choked. "are you ok?" he asked. "i'm fine," i said. he gave me a card. "i'm also giving you a 5 million clothes allowence. you wouldn't believe how expensive they are these days." he said. i looked at the card. after dinner i took a bath. it was a sunk in tub with jets heck yeah i was living the life. i pushed a boton and the jets turned on. i pushed another and a cd plyer opened. i pushed it again and it closed. i pushed another one, and purple bubbles, that smelt like mango and peaches filled the tub. the next day i ate breakfast, and got ready for the day. i went on line and opened a bank accout for the kids and put a million in each one. next i found a five bedroom house and bought that. i bought furniture and had people put it in there. i went shopping for a whole new wardrobe. i bought a plum colored convertible, a doll for haylie, a guitar and amp for owen, a new outfit for daralynn, a pair of shoes for my mom, a watch for joe to let him know time is ticking away, and i bought five tickets to disneyland. i loaded everything up, droped my things off and drove the two hours to my moms. i picked up the new keys and went to her house. i honked the horn and they all came runing out. "see what happens when you leave? you change!" my mom said. i caught blake and tossed him in the air. i hugged owen and daralynn and picked up haylie. i hugged my mom. "i told you i'd come back." i said. "oh presents!" i said, giving haylie to me mom. "owen." i said, giving him the guitar and amp. "thanks sis." he said, hugging me. "daralynn." i said. "what's channle?" she asked. "a store." i said. "haylie." i said, giving her the dolly. "thank you!" she said. i laughed. "your welcome." i said. leaning in for a kiss. "here." i said, giving the watch to joe. "mom," i said, handing her the box. she put haylie down, and opened the box. "oh, these are lovely." she said. i gave a ticket to blake. "Paper?" he asked. "that's a ticket." i said. "disneyland?" he asked, perking up. "disneyland." i said. he jumped up and down and hugged me. "mom, i want to take the kids for the day." i said. "sure." she said. once we where all in the car we drove to Disney land. we ate first. "so how's everything with out me?" i asked. giving haylie a juice sippy cup. "mom and dad are fighting." daralynn said. "about what?" i asked. "something about dad getting off his lazy a- butt and getting a job." owen said. "did he?" i asked. "yeah, but i don't think he can hold it." he said. "see how important it is to graduate and go to college?" i asked. they all nodded. "you don't want to end up like them." i said. after eating we went on rides and then i drove them back home. i sat them all in the living room. and held up the key. "you didn't!" my mom said, coming to me and throughing her arms around me. "i did." i said. "pack your clothes and toys i got you a new house." i said. once all the things where packed in the van, i put the kids in my car and led the way to the new house. once there the kids jumped out and ran to the door. i got haylie out and opened the door. they all ran in and i put haylie down. i found mom in the litchen. "you really made me proud." she said. "i put some money in accounts for the kids." i said. she nodded. "thank you." she said. "everythings goning to be okay now." i said. she smiled, as a tear slid down her cheek. "don't cry." i said, hugging her. "come on let's go food shopping." i said. after we went shopping and the kids put everything away, they went swimming. "bye guys i got to go, but i'll pick you up after school to go shopping, give me love." i said. they all swam to the side, giving me kisses. joe brang haylie to the side so i could kiss her. "could you watch haylie tomorrow? i want to have a day out with my mom." i said. "yeah. she needs that." he said. "thanks joe." i said. "alright mom i'm leaving!" i called. she came out of a bathroom. "i'm coming back tomorrow. we're going to have a girls day. joe's going to watch haylie. no buts either, you deserve this." i said. we hugged. i made it home in time for dinner. "there you are." dad said, as i came in the door. "busy girl are we?" he asked. i laughed. "how about we go catch a movie tomorow." he said. "can't i have plans." i said. 'one day in hollywood and you have plans. i'm proud of you kid, knock 'em dead. how about we go out for pizza?" he asked. "i'd like that." i said. "i'll get my keys." he said. a husky came in. "mia." i said, patting my chest. she jumped on me and kissed me. "ready?" he asked. "yep." i said. after we ate i took a shower and went down stairs. i got a bottled rootbeer and took a drink. mia came in and stretched. "do you want a treat?" i asked. she trotted over to me, and rubbed on my leg. i grabbed a puparoni and ran to my room with her following me. i jumped on my bed. she pused. "come on." i said, hitting my bed. she backed up, and jumped on my bed. i gave her the treat. i grabed her in a hug. i scratched her head. "your a good girl." i said. she licked her lips, and colapsed on me. "aw." i said, rubbing her belly. i slept with mia. the next morning i got ready, skiped breakfast, walked mia, and drove to my mom's now 20 minuets away. i knoked on the door. "why aren't you ready?" i asked. she had on a robe and her hair was in a bun. "haylie is a little hyper." she said. "go get ready." i said. i walked down the hall. "haylie!" i sang. "i'm gonna get you!" i said. "No!" she yelled. i grabbed her and tossed her in the air. she laughed. "are you hungry?" i asked. "yeah." she said. "ok, what do you want?" i asked. "strawberry." she said. i sat her at the table and cut up some strawberries. i gave it to her. "i'm going to take you out tomorow, just us, how does that sound?" i asked. "yeah." she said, shoving in a strawberry slice. "alright." mom said. we got into my car. "okay i need food and coffee." she said. "good, that's the first stop on our list." i said. "there's a list?" she asked. "don't worry mom you need this. you don't have work the kids are in school, and joe has haylie." i said, pulling into a restrant. "this ommlett is 20 dollars." she said. "get what you want, i'm paying." i said. "alright." she said. we ordered food. "so, how you doing mom?" i asked. "i'm tiered." she said. "i'm going to take haylie tomorow, so you can rest ok?" i said. she nodded. "you'll feel better when you eat." i said. right on que the food came. "this is worth 20 dollars." she said. i laughed. after we ate we went to the spa. we got a massages, Faisals, pedi., mani., and a hair cut. after that we went shoping i bought her a whole new wardrobe, plus some things she could use while taking a bath. as we drove home she said. "thanks for spoiling me." she laughed. "your welcome." i said. we put her things away, then i went to pick up the kids. "whoa!" a girl said. "your sister is so cool." another said. "i know." daralynn said. she got in. "how was your day?" i asked. "good." she said. we picked up owen and then blake. i bought them a snak and then a whole new wardrobe. i droped them off and used the bathroom. i went into owens room. he was playing the guitar. "zoey, listen to this." he said. i did. "wow, your like really good." i sad. "hey affter school, tomorrow want to hang out?" i asked. "sure, what'd you have in mind?" he asked. "i gave him the tickets. "No way, consert tickets!" he said. he jumped off his bed and hugged me. "thank's zoey." he said. he ran out of the room. "mom check this out!" he said. i went to blake's room. he was reading a book. "hey kid." i said. "hey zoey." he said. "do you want to spend Thursday with me?" i asked. "we can watch a movie or something." i said. "yeah sure." he said. i kissed his forehead and went in search of daralynn. she was putting her clothes away. "hey doll." i said. "hey, zoe." she said. i sat on her bed. "so i was thinking that this Friday you could come over to my house, and we could have a sleepover." i said. "really?" she asked, hugging me. "course." i said. "i'd love to. i'm going to pick out my pjs." she said, going to her dresser. i went to the kitchen. "want to stay for dinner?" mom asked. "can't i've been away all day. the least i could do for dad, is eat dinner with him." i said. "alright. i love you." she said. "i love you too," i said, kissing her cheek. "bye haylie." i said. "bye." she said, finger painting in a high chair. i went home. "i don't care what you say tonight we are going to watch a scary movie." he said, when i came in. i laughed. "deal." i said, putting my bag on the hall table. "so what's for dinner?" i asked. "chicken." he said. we ate, and watched the movie. i gave mia a trea took a shower and went to bed. i woke up to creaking on the carpet. "dad?" i asked. "mia?" i asked. the door pushed open and in walked mia. i patted my bed and she jumped up. "you half scared me to death." i told her. as is she understood, her ears went back and she licked me. "aw. it's okay." i said. her ears came up and she closed her eyes. damn. i went back to sleep. i took a shower skiped breakfast, walked mia, hugged my dad, which suprized him, and picked up haylie. i got her dipar bag ready gave her a sipy cup and put her in my car. "here, i got you these." i said. i gave her sunglasses. "now you can be a big girl." i said. she smiled and put them on. "ready?" i asked. "yeah!" she said. i took her out to eat, bought her a new wardrobe, which was a blash. got a couple of nasty looks, when i said she was my little sister, the looks turned sorry for me. this is hollywood, shouldn't they be used to teen moms? i took her out to lunch, then to barns and noble then to toyrus. after that i picked up the kids and droped them off. i went into my moms room. i put a blanket over her, wrote a quick note and went back to the kids. "homework." i said. "yep, zoeys back." owen said, with a smile. he grabed my hand. "i'm glad." he said. i kissed his forehead. "ok so who needs help and who needs a snak?" i asked. i got them a juice box and a pudding, put haylie down for a nap, and helped owen with his algerbra. "where's mom?" joe said, coming in to the kitchen. "sleeping." i said. "what are you doing?" he asked. "helping your kids with homework," i said. "i'll do it." he said taking off his coat. "i got it. i've always had it." i said. "1+1 is?" i asked. "2!" blake said. "wonderful." i said, giving him a gummy bear. i have this thing that i do to motivate them, i give them a gummy bear for every thing they get right, so they'll do the homework. i used to do the same for owen and daralynn, but now they get the look and they jump in. "where's haylie?" he asked. "sleeping." i said. "well, you've really got it under controll then, i'm proud of you." he said. "yeah yeah." i said. "by the way, do you know any baby sitters? i got a job." he said. "no way!' i said, with a smile. i held my hand up and he carefully returned my highfive. "i watch her." i said. "alright. how much do you want?" he asked. "i want for nothing." i said. me nodded and left. "alright homeworks down. how about you change into bathing suits and get in that pool." i said. they all jumped down and ran to their rooms. i through away thier snakcs and put their homework in thier bags. "sunscreen!" i called, as they ran to the pool. i wiped down the table, and put their bags in their rooms, on the hooks. i made their beds cleaned their bathrooms and then sweeped the back patio as they played. "did you clean?" my mom asked. "yeah, no big deal." i said. "yes it is." she said. she hugged me. "stay for dinner." she siad. "i can't." i said. "owen let's go where going to be late for the consert." i siad. we got into the car and drove to the consert. "owen!" a kid yelled he was with three other kids. they all high fived. "i didn't know that you'd be here." another kid said. "yeah, well my sister got me tickets at the last minuet."he said. "your sister rocks." a kid said. "and she's hot." another said. "you better watch it." owen siad. "okay." i said, taking owen away. "no fighting, they'll kick us out." i said. "sorry, zoey." he said. "thanks for sticking up for me." i said. he smiled and hugged me. for thriteen he was tall for his age, one inch taller than me. "ready?" i asked. " heck yeah." he said. after the consert we went to pizza. "thanks zoey that was the best." he said, chomping into a slice. "you mean a lot to me." i said. "your idol, zoey." he said. "i want to be just like you wheni grow up." he siad. "thanks buddy. but you know who i want to be when i get grown?' i asked. "who?" he asked. "just like you." i said. he smiled. after the pizza i dropped him off. "see you tomorow i said. i didn't go in cause they where probably in bed. "yeah see yah zoey." he said, opening the door. i went home. "i feel like i don't even know you." dad said, as i sat on the couch. "want to play a game?" i asked. he smiled. "what?" he asked. "it's called the three's of me. you ask me a qeustion and i answer it with three answers." i said. "ok, what do you like about hollywood?" he asked. "it's big, i like that cause i don't like to be traped. there's so many things you can do and, your here." i said he smiled. "what do you do for fun?" i asked. "paint, take pictures and my job." he said. "what's your job?" i asked. "i'm a director." he said. "cool." i said. he nodded. "what's your favorite color?" he asked. "orange, blue and green." i said. "what do you like to do for fun?' he asked. "that's a list." i laughed. "but, sing wright and act." i said. he nodded. "what else?" he asked. "i like to read. i think blake gets that from me." i said. "blake?" he asked. "oh thats my little brother." i said. "little brother? is that why your gone all the time?" he asked. "yeah, i take him places. and i also take owen, dadrlynn and haylie." i said. "a whole family huh?" he asked. "don't worry dad, the guy is so not cool." i said. "between you and me, mom blongs with you." i siad. "thanks kid." he laughed. "how'd i get my name?" i asked. "zoey was my favorit name, i don't know what i was thinking," he siad, we laughed. "Isabelle was my second. your mom liked zoey better." he said. "it fit's you." he said. "thanks." i said. "what are you doing this sunday?" he asked. "nothing." i said. "why don't you come to the set with me then?" he asked. "yeah. i got to take a shower, i just got back from taking owen out." i said. he nodded. i took a shower and slipped into bed. thursday i slept in. i took a shower and got dressed. i grabed a bowl of fruit and went to check the mail. a lawn mower started, making me jump. a guy my age came out of the garage on the lawn mower. he waved and i waved back. he drove to me. "wiett." he said, offering his hand. "zoey." i said. "nice to meet you zoey. we should hand out sometime." he said. "absolutely." i said. "cool, i got to get back, dad's gonna have a fit." he said. "bye." i siad. "bye zoey." he said, with a smile. he turned on the mower and drove away. i put the mail on the side table. i paced my bathing suit, and extra clothes. i put it in my trunk. "going to your moms?" dad asked. "you mind?" i asked. "no have fun." he said. when i pulled up blake was on the edge of the lawn talking to a boy my age. i jumped out of my car, and went to them. " what do i tell you about talking to stragers?" i asked. "jonah isn't a stranger." blake said. "i'm sorry ma'ma." jonah said. "i'm seventeen." i said. "oh, i thought you where his mom." he said. "it feels like that." i said. "blake get in the car." i said. he ran to my car and got in. "look i'd like it if you could leave my siblings alone untill, i know you better." i isa.d "haylie, get in side." i said. she ran to me and hugged my leg. "i get it all the way." he said. "we should hang out." he said. "what?" i asked, picking haylie up. "so you can get to know me. you might find out i'm not all that bad." he said. he smiled and went into his house. "you see that boy?" i asked. haylie nodded. "stay away from him." i said. she nodded. i put her inside. "did you do your home work?" i asked. "all by myself." he said. "what?" i asked. "yep." he said. "good job bud!" i said. "are you hungry?' i asked. "yeah." he said. "so i was thinking about skiping the movies, and going to chuckecheese and then barns and noble. how does that sound?" i asked. "let's do it." he said. "zoey wait!" daralynn yelled. "what's up?" i asked. "you didn't forget about tomorrow did you?" she asked. "course not, we're going to have a blast. and pack your bathing suit." i said. i hugged her, waited till she was inside and then pulled away. after we did everything i droped him off. "you tired him out, good job." mom siad, taking his bag of books. i layed sleeping blake in his bed. i changed into my bathing suit and then went swimming with owen and daralynn. after that i changed and went home. dinner was set out. "i am so sorry." i said, coming into the dinning room. i kissed dad's cheek and sat down. " this looks grate." i said. taking a bite of steak. "how was your day?" he asked. "good. i never knew a six year old can run like that." i said. "only six?" he asked. "yeah. oh and can i have someone over for a sleepover tomorrow?" i asked. "yeah." i said. my phone rang. "hey mom." i said. " haylie has a dr's app. tomorrow and it's parent's day at school, can you go with daralynn?" she asked. "i'm on it." i said. 'thanks i love you." she said. "i love you too." i said, haning up. i took a long bath and went to bed. i woke up at 5 and mia was spralled all over me. "mia." i said she jumped off my bed. i got ready, ate walked mia and drove to my moms house. everyone was in the kitchen yelling at mom. "hold on please." she sai. "yo!" i said. everything went quiet. "what the heck is going on?" i asked. "i need lunch moey." blake said. "i need a ride to school." owen said. " i need help with my hair." daralynn said. "alright. owen get your bag and brush you hair, blake put on your shoes here's five bucks. daralynn, meet me in your bathroom. i want everyone in my car in ten minuets, do not forget anything. now move move move!" i said. they all scatered. "thanks." mom said "yeah." i said. i french braided daralynns hair, and grabed her sleep over bag. we went out to my car. owen and blake stood at my trunk. i beeped it open. they tossed there things in. "everyone in the car, i want to see smiles, and the start of a good day." i said, tossing daraylynn's sleepover bag in the trunk. "did we eat?" i asked, shuting the trunk. "no." they said. "of couse you didn't." i said. "you get 'em." jonah said, opening his door. "hey jonah." i called waving. "see you around, zoey. bye kids." he said. the kids said bye, and i drove to a mcdonalds. "here, daralynn make sure blake doesn't spill." i said. "okay, if anyone trys to get in honk the horn three times." i said. i got blake out of the car, gave him his bag and walked him to class. "ok, give me love." i said, beding down. he gave me a kiss and a hug, and ran to his line. the teacher waved and i waved back. i got into the car, and drove to blakes school. "here, buy a cokie or something." i siad, giving him a five. "cool thanks." he said. he reached over, gave me a kiss and hug and got out. daralynn crawled over the seat and sat in the front. "seat belt." i said. i parked in a parking space. we got out. i gave daralynn her bag. we walked to her friends. as we got closer daralynn grabed my hand, and smiled up at me. "no way, you brang your sister?" a girl asked. "that is so, cool, daralynn." another said. "you are so the most popular girl in school!" another said. "this is may gabby and hope." daralynn said. "this is zoey. MY, big sister!" she said, proudly. after school i picked up the boys and drove home. i heard a glass break. "stay here." i said. i grabbed my pocket knife from the glove box and went in. "your such a loser!" mom yelled. she tossed a plate at joe. "no!" haylie yelled. she ran to me. i took her to my car and gave her to daralynn. owen get the car seat out of the van i said. he did. "untill you can work out what ever your fighting about, i'm taking the kids." i said. "you don't have to." mom said. "clean this glass up." i told her. she nodded. "you are 32 years old start acting like it both of you. i'll be at the park. come get the kids when your coold off." i said. i slamed the front door. "hey everything ok?" jonah asked. "yeah, fine. we're going to the park want to come?" i asked. "meet you there." he said.he layed out a blanket. we sat on it while the kids played. "i heard the fighting." he said. "i don't know what's wrong with them." i said. i watched daralynn put haylie in a swing. "joe lost his job." he said. "shocker." i said. jonah picked at the grass. "you do a lot for her." he said. "i do it for the kids." i said. "they're lucky to have you." he said. he grabed my hand. i looked at him and he smiled. i smiled back. my mom showed up. "i'm calm," she siad. she took the kids but i kept daralynn. she got into my car. i stood at jonahs car. "see you around." he said. i nodded. he kissed my forhead. i drove to my house. "woha!" she said. "mistress zoey." jeff said, opening the gates. "this is so cool." she said. mia ran over and jumped on me. " you have a dog?" daralynn asked, petting mia, who licked her arm. " want to give her a treat?" i asked. she nodded. "mia treat." i said. mia ran to the kitchen i gave atreat to daralynn. she gave the treat to mia. we watched movies did make overs nails, and hair. we went swiming and talked. she told me about school, and how she was the most popular girl in school. "zoe?" dad called. "up here." i said. "he came to my door. "oh, i was going to invite you to dinner." he said. "this is daralynn my little sister. daralynn this is my dad. do you want to go to a fansy restrant?" i said. she nodded. we got ready. " this is so much fun, you are you living the life." she said. i laughed. "a limo!" she said. "yep." i said. she got in. we ate and then went home. i carried her to my room and put her in bed. i crawled in with her and held her. mia jumped on the bed and we all went to sleep. the next day i put daralynnin the bath. i pushed the jets, and purple bubbles. i told the butler to pring us breakfast on a silver tray, that way she could have the full deal. she got dressed. "mistress zoey. miss daralynn. breakfast is served." the butler said, putting is down. we ate, and then took mia on a walk. "hey, zoey wait up!" wiett called. "hey wiett." i said. we hugged. "who's this?" he asked, rubbing mia." that's mia, and this is daralynn. my little sister." i said. "lovely to meet you miss daralynn. what are you doing this after noon?" he asked. "nothing." i said. "want to catch a movie?" he asked. "yeah, sure." i said. "cool. bye miss daralynn." he said. he jogged back to his house. after mia's walk i dropped daralynn off at the house. jonah was outside mowing his lawn, so i brang him a glass of lemonade. "thanks." he said, taking a drink. "what are you doing tomorow?" he asked. "bring your daughter to work day." i said. "what about monday?" he asked. "nothing." i said. "want to go on a picnick?" he asked. "yeah." i smiled. "keep it." i said, when he tryed to give me the glass back. he smiled. i went back inside. i went swiming with the kids and then drove home. "hi dad!" i said, hugging him. he sat at the table with his lap top in front of him. "have a good day?" he asked. "yeah, this guy i like asked, me on a date." i said. "you mean weitt?" he asked. "huh?" i asked. "he sent you something, it's in the hall." he said. i went to the hall. a dosen of roses where in the hall. i went to them. i read the note. a rose for every time i wished you where mine in the last five seconds. can't wait for our date. weitt. date? i thought that we where just going to the movies. Date. shit! i ran upstairs and got into the shower. i got ready, and the door bell rang. "hi." i said. "hey." he said. he gave me a hug. "ready?" he asked. "dad, i'm going out." i called. "be back at a desent hour, we leave early tomorow." he said. "k bye." i said, shutting the door. we got into his car and drove to the movies. after we saw the movie, he droped me off. "i had fun." he said. "me too." i said. he kissed my cheek. "see you around zoey." he said. i waved to him. i went to my room. what if wrong with me i can't like two people at the same time! "dinner." the butler said. "thanks." i said. i kicked off my high heels and went to the dinning room. "did you have a nice time?" he asked. "yeah," i said. "so we leave there at seven." he said. "okay." i said. "make sure to eat, sometimes they don't have food you'd like." he said. i gave mia a treat and went to bed. he next morning i showered dressed walked mia and ate. "ready?" he asked. "yep." i said. once we got there he should me the ropes. he was telling me about a shot when a guy walked by. i did a doubble take. "I'm going to get a water." i said. i went to the table. "hey, your jake's kid right?" he asked. "yep." i said. "i'm such a fan of his work, that's when i heard i'll be working with him, i got a little excited." he said. i laughed. "i'm josh." he said. "zoey." i said. "can i take you to dinner tuesday night?" he asked. not three guys. but of course i said. "sure, looking forward to it." he smiled. "got to get back to work." he said. "right." i said. he smiled and turned. oh my god, is he cute. after the filming i went home. there was a pacage on the floor. i picked it up. i went to my room and opened it. it was a single rose. a rose for the girl that can make me feel only the way you do, weitt. i put it with the other roses. "hello?" i asked. "honey, i'm having car trouble can you take the kids to school?" she asked. "on my way." i said. "perfect, i love you." she said. "i love you too mom." i said, hanging up. i looked at the clock 6. i did my morning rutine and drove to get the kids. i hopped to see jonah but he wasn't there. i dropped the kids off and went back to my moms. i slept in daralynn's bed and then ate lunch. after that i watched a movie with mom. after the movie i picked up the kids. while helping them, with their homework the bell rang. i opened the door. "hey." i said, to jonah. he took his arm from behind his back, and gave me a boque of large lolly pops. i laughed, and took them. he smiled and i hugged him. "ready?" he asked. "yes." i said. he opened his door, and i got in. the park we went to had a large oak tree, where we decided to eat. after twenty minutes we where having a blast. "i really like you." he said, looking down. he grabed my hand. i looked up to say something, but joanah pressed his lips to mine. a deep firey feeling filled my core, and went through my body. i scooted closer and kised him back. a soccer ball, landed in the middle of us making us split. "ready to go?" he asked. "yeah." i said. we drove home. "that was fun." i said. he smiled and pulled me in for a kiss. "alright, break it up, the kids are gonna see." my mom said. we all laughed. he kissed me once, and then walked to his house. he truned back, and smiled. i waved and he went inside. "so, you like him huh." my mom said. " i think a little too much." i said. "you could never like someone too much." she said. she kissed my forehead. "see you next time." she said. i drove home. weitt was sitting on the porch. he came up to me and kissed me. i had the same feeling but it was more powerfull, with jonah. "welcome, home." he said. "wow." i said. he pulled me back to him. his hand went down my back, and rested on my butt. "ahem." my dad said, now standing at the door. "goodnigh, Mr. hendrics." weitt said. he left our yard and when home. "dinner's ready." he said. i ate a salad, and went to bed. the next morning i slept in. "hey you okay?" dad asked. "yeah why?" i asked. "your sleeping late." he said. "i'm fine." i said. i changed into some strech pants and a swetshirt, and walked mia. "zoey." wiett said. he jogged up to me, his breath a huff of white. "hey." he said, kissing me. as we walked mia he sliped his hand into mine. it didn't feel right, like the way joanah's did. he kissed me again and i went inside. don't get me wrong i had a thing for him, but i like joanah. i took a shower and got ready. i know i'm comparing him to joanah, but when you have the perfect kiss, and perfect guy, it's hard not to. i got ready and went to dinner with josh. "what's going on here?" joanah asked. "who are you?" josh asked. "i'm her boyfriend." he said. my what now? "where just eating dinner." i said. "then why are you dressed like that?" he asked. he turned and left. i followed him. he got into his car and drove away. "what's wrong?" josh asked. "i think i just went through my first heart break." i said. i got into my car. i drove home. i cryed myself to sleep. i didn't know he was my boyfriend if i did i would of never went on that date, and i would never talk to weitt. the next morning i walked mia. "zoey this is my girlfriend, jade." weitt said. "jade you can do so much better than him. trust me." i said. i went back home. now i know how joanah feels. i have to make this right. i got into my car and drove to joanahs house. "what?" he asked. "i came here to tell you i didn't know we where dating you never said. i went to dinner with josh, just to hang out with him, my dad's filming his movie." i said. "cute pjs." he said. i pulled my jaket closed. "i didn't know." i said. i got into my car. "zoey." he said. i drove away. i went back to sleep. an hour after crying someone knocked on my door. i looked up to see joanah. he smiled, and crawled into my bed. he held me close, and kissed my forehead. "i'm sorry." i said. "shh." she said. he kissed my forehead again. "get dressed i'm taking you out." he said. "i don't deserve you." i said. he cumped my face. "i deseve you." he said. "i know you. and i love you." he said. "you do?" i asked. "everytime i'm not with with you i feel sad, like you took part of me with you. i can get your laugh out of my head. is that wierd?" he said. i smiled. "no. i love you." i said. i got ready, and met him in the front hall. he smiled. he reached for me. he liffted up my face and kissed me. Publication Date: January 7th 2018 https://www.bookrix.com/-chalen
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-william-shakespeare-the-two-gentlemen-of-verona/
William Shakespeare The Two Gentlemen of Verona DRAMATIS PERSONAE DUKE OF MILAN, father to Silvia VALENTINE, one of the two gentlemen PROTEUS, one of the two gentlemen ANTONIO, father to Proteus THURIO, a foolish rival to Valentine EGLAMOUR, agent for Silvia in her escape SPEED, a clownish servant to Valentine LAUNCE, the like to Proteus PANTHINO, servant to Antonio HOST, where Julia lodges in Milan OUTLAWS, with Valentine JULIA, a lady of Verona, beloved of Proteus SILVIA, beloved of Valentine LUCETTA, waiting-woman to Julia SERVANTS, MUSICIANS SCENE: Verona; Milan; the frontiers of Mantua ACT 1. SCENE I. Verona. An open place [Enter VALENTINE and PROTEUS.] VALENTINE. Cease to persuade, my loving Proteus: Home-keeping youth have ever homely wits. Were't not affection chains thy tender days To the sweet glances of thy honour'd love, I rather would entreat thy company To see the wonders of the world abroad, Than, living dully sluggardiz'd at home, Wear out thy youth with shapeless idleness. But since thou lov'st, love still, and thrive therein, Even as I would, when I to love begin. PROTEUS. Wilt thou be gone? Sweet Valentine, adieu! Think on thy Proteus, when thou haply seest Some rare noteworthy object in thy travel: Wish me partaker in thy happiness When thou dost meet good hap; and in thy danger, If ever danger do environ thee, Commend thy grievance to my holy prayers, For I will be thy headsman, Valentine. VALENTINE. And on a love-book pray for my success? PROTEUS. Upon some book I love I'll pray for thee. VALENTINE. That's on some shallow story of deep love, How young Leander cross'd the Hellespont. PROTEUS. That's a deep story of a deeper love; For he was more than over shoes in love. VALENTINE. 'Tis true; for you are over boots in love, And yet you never swum the Hellespont. PROTEUS. Over the boots? Nay, give me not the boots. VALENTINE. No, I will not, for it boots thee not. PROTEUS. What? VALENTINE. To be in love, where scorn is bought with groans; Coy looks with heart-sore sighs; one fading moment's mirth With twenty watchful, weary, tedious nights: If haply won, perhaps a hapless gain; If lost, why then a grievous labour won: However, but a folly bought with wit, Or else a wit by folly vanquished. PROTEUS. So, by your circumstance, you call me fool. VALENTINE. So, by your circumstance, I fear you'll prove. PROTEUS. 'Tis love you cavil at: I am not Love. VALENTINE. Love is your master, for he masters you; And he that is so yoked by a fool, Methinks, should not be chronicled for wise. PROTEUS. Yet writers say, as in the sweetest bud The eating canker dwells, so eating love Inhabits in the finest wits of all. VALENTINE. And writers say, as the most forward bud Is eaten by the canker ere it blow, Even so by love the young and tender wit Is turned to folly; blasting in the bud, Losing his verdure even in the prime, And all the fair effects of future hopes. But wherefore waste I time to counsel the That art a votary to fond desire? Once more adieu! my father at the road Expects my coming, there to see me shipp'd. PROTEUS. And thither will I bring thee, Valentine. VALENTINE. Sweet Proteus, no; now let us take our leave. To Milan let me hear from thee by letters Of thy success in love, and what news else Betideth here in absence of thy friend; And I likewise will visit thee with mine. PROTEUS. All happiness bechance to thee in Milan! VALENTINE. As much to you at home! and so farewell! [Exit.] PROTEUS. He after honour hunts, I after love; He leaves his friends to dignify them more: I leave myself, my friends, and all for love. Thou, Julia, thou hast metamorphos'd me; - Made me neglect my studies, lose my time, War with good counsel, set the world at nought; Made wit with musing weak, heart sick with thought. [Enter SPEED.] SPEED. Sir Proteus, save you! Saw you my master? PROTEUS. But now he parted hence to embark for Milan. SPEED. Twenty to one then he is shipp'd already, And I have play'd the sheep in losing him. PROTEUS. Indeed a sheep doth very often stray, An if the shepherd be a while away. SPEED. You conclude that my master is a shepherd then, and I a sheep? PROTEUS. I do. SPEED. Why then, my horns are his horns, whether I wake or sleep. PROTEUS. A silly answer, and fitting well a sheep. SPEED. This proves me still a sheep. PROTEUS. True; and thy master a shepherd. SPEED. Nay, that I can deny by a circumstance. PROTEUS. It shall go hard but I'll prove it by another. SPEED. The shepherd seeks the sheep, and not the sheep the shepherd; but I seek my master, and my master seeks not me; therefore, I am no sheep. PROTEUS. The sheep for fodder follow the shepherd; the shepherd for food follows not the sheep: thou for wages followest thy master; thy master for wages follows not thee. Therefore, thou art a sheep. SPEED. Such another proof will make me cry 'baa.' PROTEUS. But, dost thou hear? gavest thou my letter to Julia? SPEED. Ay, sir; I, a lost mutton, gave your letter to her, a laced mutton; and she, a laced mutton, gave me, a lost mutton, nothing for my labour. PROTEUS. Here's too small a pasture for such store of muttons. SPEED. If the ground be overcharged, you were best stick her. PROTEUS. Nay, in that you are astray: 'twere best pound you. SPEED. Nay, sir, less than a pound shall serve me for carrying your letter. PROTEUS. You mistake; I mean the pound, - a pinfold. SPEED. From a pound to a pin? fold it over and over, 'Tis threefold too little for carrying a letter to your lover. PROTEUS. But what said she? [SPEED nods.] Did she nod? [SPEED] Ay. PROTEUS. Nod, ay? Why, that's noddy. SPEED. You mistook, sir; I say she did nod; and you ask me if she did nod; and I say, Ay. PROTEUS. And that set together is - noddy. SPEED. Now you have taken the pains to set it together, take it for your pains. PROTEUS. No, no; you shall have it for bearing the letter. SPEED. Well, I perceive I must be fain to bear with you. PROTEUS. Why, sir, how do you bear with me? SPEED. Marry, sir, the letter, very orderly; having nothing but the word 'noddy' for my pains. PROTEUS. Beshrew me, but you have a quick wit. SPEED. And yet it cannot overtake your slow purse. PROTEUS. Come, come; open the matter; in brief: what said she? SPEED. Open your purse, that the money and the matter may be both at once delivered. PROTEUS. Well, sir, here is for your pains [giving him money]. What said she? SPEED. Truly, sir, I think you'll hardly win her. PROTEUS. Why, couldst thou perceive so much from her? SPEED. Sir, I could perceive nothing at all from her; no, not so much as a ducat for delivering your letter; and being so hard to me that brought your mind, I fear she'll prove as hard to you in telling your mind. Give her no token but stones, for she's as hard as steel. PROTEUS. What! said she nothing? SPEED. No, not so much as 'Take this for thy pains.' To testify your bounty, I thank you, you have testerned me; in requital whereof, henceforth carry your letters yourself; and so, sir, I'll commend you to my master. PROTEUS. Go, go, be gone, to save your ship from wrack; Which cannot perish, having thee aboard, Being destin'd to a drier death on shore. - [Exit SPEED.] I must go send some better messenger. I fear my Julia would not deign my lines, Receiving them from such a worthless post. [Exit.] SCENE 2. THe same. The garden Of JULIA'S house. [Enter JULIA and LUCETTA.] JULIA. But say, Lucetta, now we are alone, Wouldst thou then counsel me to fall in love? LUCETTA. Ay, madam; so you stumble not unheedfully. JULIA. Of all the fair resort of gentlemen That every day with parle encounter me, In thy opinion which is worthiest love? LUCETTA. Please you, repeat their names; I'll show my mind According to my shallow simple skill. JULIA. What think'st thou of the fair Sir Eglamour? LUCETTA. As of a knight well-spoken, neat, and fine; But, were I you, he never should be mine. JULIA. What think'st thou of the rich Mercatio? LUCETTA. Well of his wealth; but of himself, so so. JULIA. What think'st thou of the gentle Proteus? LUCETTA. Lord, Lord! to see what folly reigns in us! JULIA. How now! what means this passion at his name? LUCETTA. Pardon, dear madam; 'tis a passing shame That I, unworthy body as I am, Should censure thus on lovely gentlemen. JULIA. Why not on Proteus, as of all the rest? LUCETTA. Then thus, - of many good I think him best. JULIA. Your reason? LUCETTA. I have no other but a woman's reason: I think him so, because I think him so. JULIA. And wouldst thou have me cast my love on him? LUCETTA. Ay, if you thought your love not cast away. JULIA. Why, he, of all the rest, hath never moved me. LUCETTA. Yet he, of all the rest, I think, best loves ye. JULIA. His little speaking shows his love but small. LUCETTA. Fire that's closest kept burns most of all. JULIA. They do not love that do not show their love. LUCETTA. O! they love least that let men know their love. JULIA. I would I knew his mind. LUCETTA. Peruse this paper, madam. [Gives a letter.] JULIA. 'To Julia' - Say, from whom? LUCETTA. That the contents will show. JULIA. Say, say, who gave it thee? LUCETTA. Sir Valentine's page, and sent, I think, from Proteus. He would have given it you; but I, being in the way, Did in your name receive it; pardon the fault, I pray. JULIA. Now, by my modesty, a goodly broker! Dare you presume to harbour wanton lines? To whisper and conspire against my youth? Now, trust me, 'tis an office of great worth, And you an officer fit for the place. There, take the paper; see it be return'd; Or else return no more into my sight. LUCETTA. To plead for love deserves more fee than hate. JULIA. Will ye be gone? LUCETTA. That you may ruminate. [Exit.] JULIA. And yet, I would I had o'erlook'd the letter. It were a shame to call her back again, And pray her to a fault for which I chid her. What fool is she, that knows I am a maid And would not force the letter to my view! Since maids, in modesty, say 'No' to that Which they would have the profferer construe 'Ay.' Fie, fie, how wayward is this foolish love, That like a testy babe will scratch the nurse, And presently, all humbled, kiss the rod! How churlishly I chid Lucetta hence, When willingly I would have had her here: How angerly I taught my brow to frown, When inward joy enforc'd my heart to smile. My penance is, to call Lucetta back And ask remission for my folly past. What ho! Lucetta! [Re-enter LUCETTA.] LUCETTA. What would your ladyship? JULIA. Is it near dinner time? LUCETTA. I would it were; That you might kill your stomach on your meat And not upon your maid. JULIA. What is't that you took up so gingerly? LUCETTA. Nothing. JULIA. Why didst thou stoop, then? LUCETTA. To take a paper up That I let fall. JULIA. And is that paper nothing? LUCETTA. Nothing concerning me. JULIA. Then let it lie for those that it concerns. LUCETTA. Madam, it will not lie where it concerns, Unless it have a false interpreter. JULIA. Some love of yours hath writ to you in rime. LUCETTA. That I might sing it, madam, to a tune: Give me a note: your ladyship can set. JULIA. As little by such toys as may be possible; Best sing it to the tune of 'Light o' Love.' LUCETTA. It is too heavy for so light a tune. JULIA. Heavy! belike it hath some burden then? LUCETTA. Ay; and melodious were it, would you sing it. JULIA. And why not you? LUCETTA. I cannot reach so high. JULIA. Let's see your song. [Taking the letter.] How now, minion! LUCETTA. Keep tune there still, so you will sing it out: And yet methinks, I do not like this tune. JULIA. You do not? LUCETTA. No, madam; it is too sharp. JULIA. You, minion, are too saucy. LUCETTA. Nay, now you are too flat And mar the concord with too harsh a descant; There wanteth but a mean to fill your song. JULIA. The mean is drown'd with your unruly bass. LUCETTA. Indeed, I bid the base for Proteus. JULIA. This babble shall not henceforth trouble me. Here is a coil with protestation! - [Tears the letter.] Go, get you gone; and let the papers lie: You would be fingering them, to anger me. LUCETTA. She makes it strange; but she would be best pleas'd To be so anger'd with another letter. [Exit.] JULIA. Nay, would I were so anger'd with the same! O hateful hands, to tear such loving words! Injurious wasps, to feed on such sweet honey And kill the bees that yield it with your stings! I'll kiss each several paper for amends. Look, here is writ 'kind Julia.' Unkind Julia! As in revenge of thy ingratitude, I throw thy name against the bruising stones, Trampling contemptuously on thy disdain. And here is writ 'love-wounded Proteus': Poor wounded name! my bosom, as a bed, Shall lodge thee till thy wound be throughly heal'd; And thus I search it with a sovereign kiss. But twice or thrice was 'Proteus' written down: Be calm, good wind, blow not a word away Till I have found each letter in the letter Except mine own name; that some whirlwind bear Unto a ragged, fearful-hanging rock, And throw it thence into the raging sea! Lo, here in one line is his name twice writ: 'Poor forlorn Proteus, passionate Proteus, To the sweet Julia': - that I'll tear away; And yet I will not, sith so prettily He couples it to his complaining names: Thus will I fold them one upon another: Now kiss, embrace, contend, do what you will. [Re-enter LUCETTA.] LUCETTA. Madam, Dinner is ready, and your father stays. JULIA. Well, let us go. LUCETTA. What! shall these papers lie like tell-tales here? JULIA. If you respect them, best to take them up. LUCETTA. Nay, I was taken up for laying them down; Yet here they shall not lie, for catching cold. JULIA. I see you have a month's mind to them. LUCETTA. Ay, madam, you may say what sights you see; I see things too, although you judge I wink. JULIA. Come, come; will't please you go? [Exeunt.] SCENE 3. The same. A room in ANTONIO'S house. [Enter ANTONIO and PANTHINO.] ANTONIO. Tell me, Panthino, what sad talk was that Wherewith my brother held you in the cloister? PANTHINO. 'Twas of his nephew Proteus, your son. ANTONIO. Why, what of him? PANTHINO. He wonder'd that your lordship Would suffer him to spend his youth at home, While other men, of slender reputation, Put forth their sons to seek preferment out: Some to the wars, to try their fortune there; Some to discover islands far away; Some to the studious universities. For any, or for all these exercises, He said that Proteus, your son, was meet; And did request me to importune you To let him spend his time no more at home, Which would be great impeachment to his age, In having known no travel in his youth. ANTONIO. Nor need'st thou much importune me to that Whereon this month I have been hammering. I have consider'd well his loss of time, And how he cannot be a perfect man, Not being tried and tutor'd in the world: Experience is by industry achiev'd, And perfected by the swift course of time. Then tell me whither were I best to send him? PANTHINO. I think your lordship is not ignorant How his companion, youthful Valentine, Attends the emperor in his royal court. ANTONIO. I know it well. PANTHINO. 'Twere good, I think, your lordship sent him thither: There shall he practise tilts and tournaments, Hear sweet discourse, converse with noblemen, And be in eye of every exercise Worthy his youth and nobleness of birth. ANTONIO. I like thy counsel; well hast thou advis'd; And that thou mayst perceive how well I like it, The execution of it shall make known: Even with the speediest expedition I will dispatch him to the emperor's court. PANTHINO. To-morrow, may it please you, Don Alphonso With other gentlemen of good esteem Are journeying to salute the emperor And to commend their service to his will. ANTONIO. Good company; with them shall Proteus go. And in good time: - now will we break with him. [Enter PROTEUS.] PROTEUS. Sweet love! sweet lines! sweet life! Here is her hand, the agent of her heart; Here is her oath for love, her honour's pawn. O! that our fathers would applaud our loves, To seal our happiness with their consents! O heavenly Julia! ANTONIO. How now! What letter are you reading there? PROTEUS. May't please your lordship, 'tis a word or two Of commendations sent from Valentine, Deliver'd by a friend that came from him. ANTONIO. Lend me the letter; let me see what news. PROTEUS. There is no news, my lord; but that he writes How happily he lives, how well belov'd And daily graced by the emperor; Wishing me with him, partner of his fortune. ANTONIO. And how stand you affected to his wish? PROTEUS. As one relying on your lordship's will, And not depending on his friendly wish. ANTONIO. My will is something sorted with his wish. Muse not that I thus suddenly proceed; For what I will, I will, and there an end. I am resolv'd that thou shalt spend some time With Valentinus in the Emperor's court: What maintenance he from his friends receives, Like exhibition thou shalt have from me. To-morrow be in readiness to go: Excuse it not, for I am peremptory. PROTEUS. My lord, I cannot be so soon provided; Please you, deliberate a day or two. ANTONIO. Look, what thou want'st shall be sent after thee: No more of stay; to-morrow thou must go. Come on, Panthino: you shall be employ'd To hasten on his expedition. [Exeunt ANTONIO and PANTHINO.] PROTEUS. Thus have I shunn'd the fire for fear of burning, And drench'd me in the sea, where I am drown'd. I fear'd to show my father Julia's letter, Lest he should take exceptions to my love; And with the vantage of mine own excuse Hath he excepted most against my love. O! how this spring of love resembleth The uncertain glory of an April day, Which now shows all the beauty of the sun, And by an by a cloud takes all away! [Re-enter PANTHINO.] PANTHINO. Sir Proteus, your father calls for you; He is in haste; therefore, I pray you, go. PROTEUS. Why, this it is: my heart accords thereto, And yet a thousand times it answers 'no.' [Exeunt.] ACT 2. SCENE I. Milan. A room in the DUKE'S palace. [Enter VALENTINE and SPEED.] SPEED. Sir, your glove. [Offering a glove.] VALENTINE. Not mine; my gloves are on. SPEED. Why, then, this may be yours; for this is but one. VALENTINE. Ha! let me see; ay, give it me, it's mine; Sweet ornament that decks a thing divine! Ah, Silvia! Silvia! SPEED. [Calling.] Madam Silvia! Madam Silvia! VALENTINE. How now, sirrah? SPEED. She is not within hearing, sir. VALENTINE. Why, sir, who bade you call her? SPEED. Your worship, sir; or else I mistook. VALENTINE. Well, you'll still be too forward. SPEED. And yet I was last chidden for being too slow. VALENTINE. Go to, sir. tell me, do you know Madam Silvia? SPEED. She that your worship loves? VALENTINE. Why, how know you that I am in love? SPEED. Marry, by these special marks: first, you have learned, like Sir Proteus, to wreath your arms like a malcontent; to relish a love-song, like a robin redbreast; to walk alone, like one that had the pestilence; to sigh, like a school-boy that had lost his A B C; to weep, like a young wench that had buried her grandam; to fast, like one that takes diet; to watch, like one that fears robbing; to speak puling, like a beggar at Hallowmas. You were wont, when you laughed, to crow like a cock; when you walked, to walk like one of the lions; when you fasted, it was presently after dinner; when you looked sadly, it was for want of money. And now you are metamorphosed with a mistress, that, when I look on you, I can hardly think you my master. VALENTINE. Are all these things perceived in me? SPEED. They are all perceived without ye. VALENTINE. Without me? They cannot. SPEED. Without you? Nay, that's certain; for, without you were so simple, none else would; but you are so without these follies that these follies are within you, and shine through you like the water in an urinal, that not an eye that sees you but is a physician to comment on your malady. VALENTINE. But tell me, dost thou know my lady Silvia? SPEED. She that you gaze on so as she sits at supper? VALENTINE. Hast thou observed that? Even she, I mean. SPEED. Why, sir, I know her not. VALENTINE. Dost thou know her by my gazing on her, and yet know'st her not? SPEED. Is she not hard-favoured, sir? VALENTINE. Not so fair, boy, as well-favoured. SPEED. Sir, I know that well enough. VALENTINE. What dost thou know? SPEED. That she is not so fair as, of you, well-favoured. VALENTINE. I mean that her beauty is exquisite, but her favour infinite. SPEED. That's because the one is painted, and the other out of all count. VALENTINE. How painted? and how out of count? SPEED. Marry, sir, so painted to make her fair, that no man counts of her beauty. VALENTINE. How esteem'st thou me? I account of her beauty. SPEED. You never saw her since she was deformed. VALENTINE. How long hath she been deformed? SPEED. Ever since you loved her. VALENTINE. I have loved her ever since I saw her, and still I see her beautiful. SPEED. If you love her, you cannot see her. VALENTINE. Why? SPEED. Because Love is blind. O! that you had mine eyes; or your own eyes had the lights they were wont to have when you chid at Sir Proteus for going ungartered! VALENTINE. What should I see then? SPEED. Your own present folly and her passing deformity; for he, being in love, could not see to garter his hose; and you, being in love, cannot see to put on your hose. VALENTINE. Belike, boy, then you are in love; for last morning you could not see to wipe my shoes. SPEED. True, sir; I was in love with my bed. I thank you, you swinged me for my love, which makes me the bolder to chide you for yours. VALENTINE. In conclusion, I stand affected to her. SPEED. I would you were set, so your affection would cease. VALENTINE. Last night she enjoined me to write some lines to one she loves. SPEED. And have you? VALENTINE. I have. SPEED. Are they not lamely writ? VALENTINE. No, boy, but as well as I can do them. Peace! here she comes. [Enter SILVIA.] SPEED. [Aside] O excellent motion! O exceeding puppet! Now will he interpret to her. VALENTINE. Madam and mistress, a thousand good morrows. SPEED. [Aside] O, give ye good even: here's a million of manners. SILVIA. Sir Valentine and servant, to you two thousand. SPEED. [Aside] He should give her interest, and she gives it him. VALENTINE. As you enjoin'd me, I have writ your letter Unto the secret nameless friend of yours; Which I was much unwilling to proceed in, But for my duty to your ladyship. [Gives a letter.] SILVIA. I thank you, gentle servant. 'Tis very clerkly done. VALENTINE. Now trust me, madam, it came hardly off; For, being ignorant to whom it goes, I writ at random, very doubtfully. SILVIA. Perchance you think too much of so much pains? VALENTINE. No, madam; so it stead you, I will write, Please you command, a thousand times as much; And yet - SILVIA. A pretty period! Well, I guess the sequel; And yet I will not name it; and yet I care not. And yet take this again; and yet I thank you, Meaning henceforth to trouble you no more. SPEED. [Aside] And yet you will; and yet another yet. VALENTINE. What means your ladyship? Do you not like it? SILVIA. Yes, yes; the lines are very quaintly writ; But, since unwillingly, take them again: Nay, take them. [Gives hack the letter.] VALENTINE. Madam, they are for you. SILVIA. Ay, ay, you writ them, sir, at my request; But I will none of them; they are for you. I would have had them writ more movingly. VALENTINE. Please you, I'll write your ladyship another. SILVIA. And when it's writ, for my sake read it over; And if it please you, so; if not, why, so. VALENTINE. If it please me, madam, what then? SILVIA. Why, if it please you, take it for your labour. And so good morrow, servant. [Exit.] SPEED. O jest unseen, inscrutable, invisible, As a nose on a man's face, or a weathercock on a steeple! My master sues to her; and she hath taught her suitor, He being her pupil, to become her tutor. O excellent device! Was there ever heard a better, That my master, being scribe, to himself should write the letter? VALENTINE. How now, sir! What are you reasoning with yourself? SPEED. Nay, I was rhyming: 'tis you that have the reason. VALENTINE. To do what? SPEED. To be a spokesman from Madam Silvia. VALENTINE. To whom? SPEED. To yourself; why, she woos you by a figure. VALENTINE. What figure? SPEED. By a letter, I should say. VALENTINE. Why, she hath not writ to me? SPEED. What need she, when she hath made you write to yourself? Why, do you not perceive the jest? VALENTINE. No, believe me. SPEED. No believing you indeed, sir. But did you perceive her earnest? VALENTINE. She gave me none except an angry word. SPEED. Why, she hath given you a letter. VALENTINE. That's the letter I writ to her friend. SPEED. And that letter hath she delivered, and there an end. VALENTINE. I would it were no worse. SPEED. I'll warrant you 'tis as well. 'For often have you writ to her; and she, in modesty, Or else for want of idle time, could not again reply; Or fearing else some messenger that might her mind discover, Herself hath taught her love himself to write unto her lover.' All this I speak in print, for in print I found it. Why muse you, sir? 'Tis dinner time. VALENTINE. I have dined. SPEED. Ay, but hearken, sir; though the chameleon Love can feed on the air, I am one that am nourished by my victuals, and would fain have meat. O! be not like your mistress! Be moved, be moved. [Exeunt.] SCENE 2. Verona. A room in JULIA'S house. [Enter PROTEUS and JULIA.] PROTEUS. Have patience, gentle Julia. JULIA. I must, where is no remedy. PROTEUS. When possibly I can, I will return. JULIA. If you turn not, you will return the sooner. Keep this remembrance for thy Julia's sake. [Gives him a ring.] PROTEUS. Why, then, we'll make exchange. Here, take you this. [Gives her another.] JULIA. And seal the bargain with a holy kiss. PROTEUS. Here is my hand for my true constancy; And when that hour o'erslips me in the day Wherein I sigh not, Julia, for thy sake, The next ensuing hour some foul mischance Torment me for my love's forgetfulness! My father stays my coming; answer not; The tide is now: nay, not thy tide of tears: That tide will stay me longer than I should. Julia, farewell! [Exit JULIA.] What, gone without a word? Ay, so true love should do: it cannot speak; For truth hath better deeds than words to grace it. [Enter PANTHINO.] PANTHINO. Sir Proteus, you are stay'd for. PROTEUS. Go; I come, I come. Alas! this parting strikes poor lovers dumb. [Exeunt.] SCENE 3. The same. A street [Enter LAUNCE, leading a dog.] LAUNCE. Nay, 'twill be this hour ere I have done weeping; all the kind of the Launces have this very fault. I have received my proportion, like the prodigious son, and am going with Sir Proteus to the imperial's court. I think Crab my dog be the sourest-natured dog that lives: my mother weeping, my father wailing, my sister crying, our maid howling, our cat wringing her hands, and all our house in a great perplexity; yet did not this cruel-hearted cur shed one tear. He is a stone, a very pebble stone, and has no more pity in him than a dog; a Jew would have wept to have seen our parting; why, my grandam having no eyes, look you, wept herself blind at my parting. Nay, I'll show you the manner of it. This shoe is my father; no, this left shoe is my father; no, no, left shoe is my mother; nay, that cannot be so neither; yes, it is so, it is so, it hath the worser sole. This shoe with the hole in it is my mother, and this my father. A vengeance on 't! There 'tis: now, sir, this staff is my sister, for, look you, she is as white as a lily and as small as a wand; this hat is Nan our maid; I am the dog; no, the dog is himself, and I am the dog - O! the dog is me, and I am myself; ay, so, so. Now come I to my father: 'Father, your blessing.' Now should not the shoe speak a word for weeping; now should I kiss my father; well, he weeps on. Now come I to my mother; - O, that she could speak now like a wood woman! Well, I kiss her; why there 'tis; here's my mother's breath up and down. Now come I to my sister; mark the moan she makes. Now the dog all this while sheds not a tear, nor speaks a word; but see how I lay the dust with my tears. [Enter PANTHINO.] PANTHINO. Launce, away, away, aboard! Thy master is shipped, and thou art to post after with oars. What's the matter? Why weep'st thou, man? Away, ass! You'll lose the tide if you tarry any longer. LAUNCE. It is no matter if the tied were lost; for it is the unkindest tied that ever any man tied. PANTHINO. What's the unkindest tide? LAUNCE. Why, he that's tied here, Crab, my dog. PANTHINO. Tut, man, I mean thou'lt lose the flood, and, in losing the flood, lose thy voyage, and, in losing thy voyage, lose thy master, and, in losing thy master, lose thy service, and, in losing thy service, - Why dost thou stop my mouth? LAUNCE. For fear thou shouldst lose thy tongue. PANTHINO. Where should I lose my tongue? LAUNCE. In thy tale. PANTHINO. In thy tail! LAUNCE. Lose the tide, and the voyage, and the master, and the service, and the tied! Why, man, if the river were dry, I am able to fill it with my tears; if the wind were down, I could drive the boat with my sighs. PANTHINO. Come, come away, man; I was sent to call thee. LAUNCE. Sir, call me what thou darest. PANTHINO. Will thou go? LAUNCE. Well, I will go. [Exeunt.] SCENE 4. Milan. A room in the DUKE'S palace. [Enter SILVIA, VALENTINE, THURIO, and SPEED.] SILVIA. Servant! VALENTINE. Mistress? SPEED. Master, Sir Thurio frowns on you. VALENTINE. Ay, boy, it's for love. SPEED. Not of you. VALENTINE. Of my mistress, then. SPEED. 'Twere good you knock'd him. SILVIA. Servant, you are sad. VALENTINE. Indeed, madam, I seem so. THURIO. Seem you that you are not? VALENTINE. Haply I do. THURIO. So do counterfeits. VALENTINE. So do you. THURIO. What seem I that I am not? VALENTINE. Wise. THURIO. What instance of the contrary? VALENTINE. Your folly. THURIO. And how quote you my folly? VALENTINE. I quote it in your jerkin. THURIO. My jerkin is a doublet. VALENTINE. Well, then, I'll double your folly. THURIO. How? SILVIA. What, angry, Sir Thurio! Do you change colour? VALENTINE. Give him leave, madam; he is a kind of chameleon. THURIO. That hath more mind to feed on your blood than live in your air. VALENTINE. You have said, sir. THURIO. Ay, sir, and done too, for this time. VALENTINE. I know it well, sir; you always end ere you begin. SILVIA. A fine volley of words, gentlemen, and quickly shot off. VALENTINE. 'Tis indeed, madam; we thank the giver. SILVIA. Who is that, servant? VALENTINE. Yourself, sweet lady; for you gave the fire. Sir Thurio borrows his wit from your ladyship's looks, and spends what he borrows kindly in your company. THURIO. Sir, if you spend word for word with me, I shall make your wit bankrupt. VALENTINE. I know it well, sir; you have an exchequer of words, and, I think, no other treasure to give your followers; for it appears by their bare liveries that they live by your bare words. [Enter DUKE] SILVIA. No more, gentlemen, no more. Here comes my father. [Enter DUKE.] DUKE. Now, daughter Silvia, you are hard beset. Sir Valentine, your father is in good health. What say you to a letter from your friends Of much good news? VALENTINE. My lord, I will be thankful To any happy messenger from thence. DUKE. Know ye Don Antonio, your countryman? VALENTINE. Ay, my good lord, I know the gentleman To be of worth and worthy estimation, And not without desert so well reputed. DUKE. Hath he not a son? VALENTINE. Ay, my good lord; a son that well deserves The honour and regard of such a father. DUKE. You know him well? VALENTINE. I knew him as myself; for from our infancy We have convers'd and spent our hours together; And though myself have been an idle truant, Omitting the sweet benefit of time To clothe mine age with angel-like perfection, Yet hath Sir Proteus, - for that's his name, - Made use and fair advantage of his days: His years but young, but his experience old; His head unmellowed, but his judgment ripe; And, in a word, - for far behind his worth Comes all the praises that I now bestow, - He is complete in feature and in mind, With all good grace to grace a gentleman. DUKE. Beshrew me, sir, but if he make this good, He is as worthy for an empress' love As meet to be an emperor's counsellor. Well, sir, this gentleman is come to me With commendation from great potentates, And here he means to spend his time awhile. I think 'tis no unwelcome news to you. VALENTINE. Should I have wish'd a thing, it had been he. DUKE. Welcome him, then, according to his worth. Silvia, I speak to you, and you, Sir Thurio: - For Valentine, I need not cite him to it. I will send him hither to you presently. [Exit.] VALENTINE. This is the gentleman I told your ladyship Had come along with me but that his mistresss Did hold his eyes lock'd in her crystal looks. SILVIA. Belike that now she hath enfranchis'd them Upon some other pawn for fealty. VALENTINE. Nay, sure, I think she holds them prisoners still. SILVIA. Nay, then, he should be blind; and, being blind, How could he see his way to seek out you? VALENTINE. Why, lady, Love hath twenty pair of eyes. THURIO. They say that Love hath not an eye at all. VALENTINE. To see such lovers, Thurio, as yourself: Upon a homely object Love can wink. SILVIA. Have done, have done; here comes the gentleman. [Enter PROTEUS] VALENTINE. Welcome, dear Proteus! Mistress, I beseech you Confirm his welcome with some special favour. SILVIA. His worth is warrant for his welcome hither, If this be he you oft have wish'd to hear from. VALENTINE. Mistress, it is; sweet lady, entertain him To be my fellow-servant to your ladyship. SILVIA. Too low a mistress for so high a servant. PROTEUS. Not so, sweet lady; but too mean a servant To have a look of such a worthy mistress. VALENTINE. Leave off discourse of disability; Sweet lady, entertain him for your servant. PROTEUS. My duty will I boast of, nothing else. SILVIA. And duty never yet did want his meed. Servant, you are welcome to a worthless mistress. PROTEUS. I'll die on him that says so but yourself. SILVIA. That you are welcome? PROTEUS. That you are worthless. [Enter a servant.] SERVANT. Madam, my lord your father would speak with you. SILVIA. I wait upon his pleasure. [Exit Servant.] Come, Sir Thurio, Go with me. Once more, new servant, welcome. I'll leave you to confer of home affairs; When you have done we look to hear from you. PROTEUS. We'll both attend upon your ladyship. [Exeunt SILVIA, THURIO, and SPEED.] VALENTINE. Now, tell me, how do all from whence you came? PROTEUS. Your friends are well, and have them much commended. VALENTINE. And how do yours? PROTEUS. I left them all in health. VALENTINE. How does your lady, and how thrives your love? PROTEUS. My tales of love were wont to weary you; I know you joy not in a love-discourse. VALENTINE. Ay, Proteus, but that life is alter'd now; I have done penance for contemning Love; Whose high imperious thoughts have punish'd me With bitter fasts, with penitential groans, With nightly tears, and daily heart-sore sighs; For, in revenge of my contempt of love, Love hath chas'd sleep from my enthralled eyes And made them watchers of mine own heart's sorrow. O, gentle Proteus! Love's a mighty lord, And hath so humbled me as I confess, There is no woe to his correction, Nor to his service no such joy on earth. Now no discourse, except it be of love; Now can I break my fast, dine, sup, and sleep, Upon the very naked name of love. PROTEUS. Enough; I read your fortune in your eye. Was this the idol that you worship so? VALENTINE. Even she; and is she not a heavenly saint? PROTEUS. No; but she is an earthly paragon. VALENTINE. Call her divine. PROTEUS. I will not flatter her. VALENTINE. O! flatter me; for love delights in praises. PROTEUS. When I was sick you gave me bitter pills, And I must minister the like to you. VALENTINE. Then speak the truth by her; if not divine, Yet let her be a principality, Sovereign to all the creatures on the earth. PROTEUS. Except my mistress. VALENTINE. Sweet, except not any, Except thou wilt except against my love. PROTEUS. Have I not reason to prefer mine own? VALENTINE. And I will help thee to prefer her too: She shall be dignified with this high honour, - To bear my lady's train, lest the base earth Should from her vesture chance to steal a kiss, And, of so great a favour growing proud, Disdain to root the summer-swelling flower And make rough winter everlastingly. PROTEUS. Why, Valentine, what braggardism is this? VALENTINE. Pardon me, Proteus; all I can is nothing To her, whose worth makes other worthies nothing; She is alone. PROTEUS. Then, let her alone. VALENTINE. Not for the world: why, man, she is mine own; And I as rich in having such a jewel As twenty seas, if all their sand were pearl, The water nectar, and the rocks pure gold. Forgive me that I do not dream on thee, Because thou see'st me dote upon my love. My foolish rival, that her father likes Only for his possessions are so huge, Is gone with her along; and I must after, For love, thou know'st, is full of jealousy. PROTEUS. But she loves you? VALENTINE. Ay, and we are betroth'd; nay more, our marriage-hour, With all the cunning manner of our flight, Determin'd of: how I must climb her window, The ladder made of cords, and all the means Plotted and 'greed on for my happiness. Good Proteus, go with me to my chamber, In these affairs to aid me with thy counsel. PROTEUS. Go on before; I shall enquire you forth: I must unto the road to disembark Some necessaries that I needs must use; And then I'll presently attend you. VALENTINE. Will you make haste? PROTEUS. I will. [Exit VALENTINE.] Even as one heat another heat expels Or as one nail by strength drives out another, So the remembrance of my former love Is by a newer object quite forgotten. Is it my mind, or Valentinus' praise, Her true perfection, or my false transgression, That makes me reasonless to reason thus? She is fair; and so is Julia that I love, - That I did love, for now my love is thaw'd; Which like a waxen image 'gainst a fire Bears no impression of the thing it was. Methinks my zeal to Valentine is cold, And that I love him not as I was wont. O! but I love his lady too-too much, And that's the reason I love him so little. How shall I dote on her with more advice That thus without advice begin to love her? 'Tis but her picture I have yet beheld, And that hath dazzled my reason's light; But when I look on her perfections, There is no reason but I shall be blind. If I can check my erring love, I will; If not, to compass her I'll use my skill. [Exit.] SCENE 5. The same. A street [Enter SPEED and LAUNCE.] SPEED. Launce! by mine honesty, welcome to Milan! LAUNCE. Forswear not thyself, sweet youth, for I am not welcome. I reckon this always, that a man is never undone till he be hanged, nor never welcome to a place till some certain shot be paid, and the hostess say 'Welcome!' SPEED. Come on, you madcap; I'll to the alehouse with you presently; where, for one shot of five pence, thou shalt have five thousand welcomes. But, sirrah, how did thy master part with Madam Julia? LAUNCE. Marry, after they clos'd in earnest, they parted very fairly in jest. SPEED. But shall she marry him? LAUNCE. No. SPEED. How then? Shall he marry her? LAUNCE. No, neither. SPEED. What, are they broken? LAUNCE. No, they are both as whole as a fish. SPEED. Why then, how stands the matter with them? LAUNCE. Marry, thus: when it stands well with him, it stands well with her. SPEED. What an ass art thou! I understand thee not. LAUNCE. What a block art thou that thou canst not! My staff understands me. SPEED. What thou sayest? LAUNCE. Ay, and what I do too; look thee, I'll but lean, and my staff understands me. SPEED. It stands under thee, indeed. LAUNCE. Why, stand-under and under-stand is all one. SPEED. But tell me true, will't be a match? LAUNCE. Ask my dog. If he say ay, it will; if he say no, it will; if he shake his tail and say nothing, it will. SPEED. The conclusion is, then, that it will. LAUNCE. Thou shalt never get such a secret from me but by a parable. SPEED. 'Tis well that I get it so. But, Launce, how sayest thou that my master is become a notable lover? LAUNCE. I never knew him otherwise. SPEED. Than how? LAUNCE. A notable lubber, as thou reportest him to be. SPEED. Why, thou whoreson ass, thou mistak'st me. LAUNCE. Why, fool, I meant not thee, I meant thy master. SPEED. I tell thee my master is become a hot lover. LAUNCE. Why, I tell thee I care not though he burn himself in love. If thou wilt, go with me to the alehouse; if not, thou art an Hebrew, a Jew, and not worth the name of a Christian. SPEED. Why? LAUNCE. Because thou hast not so much charity in thee as to go to the ale with a Christian. Wilt thou go? SPEED. At thy service. [Exeunt.] SCENE 6. The same. The DUKE's palace. [Enter PROTEUS.] PROTEUS. To leave my Julia, shall I be forsworn; To love fair Silvia, shall I be forsworn; To wrong my friend, I shall be much forsworn; And even that power which gave me first my oath Provokes me to this threefold perjury: Love bade me swear, and Love bids me forswear. O sweet-suggesting Love! if thou hast sinn'd, Teach me, thy tempted subject, to excuse it. At first I did adore a twinkling star, But now I worship a celestial sun. Unheedful vows may heedfully be broken; And he wants wit that wants resolved will To learn his wit t' exchange the bad for better. Fie, fie, unreverend tongue, to call her bad, Whose sovereignty so oft thou hast preferr'd With twenty thousand soul-confirming oaths. I cannot leave to love, and yet I do; But there I leave to love where I should love. Julia I lose, and Valentine I lose; If I keep them, I needs must lose myself; If I lose them, thus find I by their loss, For Valentine, myself; for Julia, Silvia. I to myself am dearer than a friend, For love is still most precious in itself; And Silvia - witness heaven, that made her fair! - Shows Julia but a swarthy Ethiope. I will forget that Julia is alive, Remembering that my love to her is dead; And Valentine I'll hold an enemy, Aiming at Silvia as a sweeter friend. I cannot now prove constant to myself Without some treachery us'd to Valentine. This night he meaneth with a corded ladder To climb celestial Silvia's chamber window, Myself in counsel, his competitor. Now presently I'll give her father notice Of their disguising and pretended flight; Who, all enrag'd, will banish Valentine; For Thurio, he intends, shall wed his daughter; But, Valentine being gone, I'll quickly cross, By some sly trick blunt Thurio's dull proceeding. Love, lend me wings to make my purpose swift, As thou hast lent me wit to plot this drift! [Exit.] SCENE 7. Verona. A room in JULIA'S house. [Enter JULIA and LUCETTA.] JULIA. Counsel, Lucetta; gentle girl, assist me: And, ev'n in kind love, I do conjure thee, Who art the table wherein all my thoughts Are visibly character'd and engrav'd, To lesson me and tell me some good mean How, with my honour, I may undertake A journey to my loving Proteus. LUCETTA. Alas, the way is wearisome and long. JULIA. A true-devoted pilgrim is not weary To measure kingdoms with his feeble steps; Much less shall she that hath Love's wings to fly, And when the flight is made to one so dear, Of such divine perfection, as Sir Proteus. LUCETTA. Better forbear till Proteus make return. JULIA. O! know'st thou not his looks are my soul's food? Pity the dearth that I have pined in By longing for that food so long a time. Didst thou but know the inly touch of love. Thou wouldst as soon go kindle fire with snow As seek to quench the fire of love with words. LUCETTA. I do not seek to quench your love's hot fire, But qualify the fire's extreme rage, Lest it should burn above the bounds of reason. JULIA. The more thou damm'st it up, the more it burns. The current that with gentle murmur glides, Thou know'st, being stopp'd, impatiently doth rage; But when his fair course is not hindered, He makes sweet music with th' enamell'd stones, Giving a gentle kiss to every sedge He overtaketh in his pilgrimage; And so by many winding nooks he strays, With willing sport, to the wild ocean. Then let me go, and hinder not my course. I'll be as patient as a gentle stream, And make a pastime of each weary step, Till the last step have brought me to my love; And there I'll rest as, after much turmoil, A blessed soul doth in Elysium. LUCETTA. But in what habit will you go along? JULIA. Not like a woman, for I would prevent The loose encounters of lascivious men. Gentle Lucetta, fit me with such weeds As may beseem some well-reputed page. LUCETTA. Why then, your ladyship must cut your hair. JULIA. No, girl; I'll knit it up in silken strings With twenty odd-conceited true-love knots: To be fantastic may become a youth Of greater time than I shall show to be. LUCETTA. What fashion, madam, shall I make your breeches? JULIA. That fits as well as 'Tell me, good my lord, What compass will you wear your farthingale?' Why even what fashion thou best likes, Lucetta. LUCETTA. You must needs have them with a codpiece, madam. JULIA. Out, out, Lucetta, that will be ill-favour'd. LUCETTA. A round hose, madam, now's not worth a pin, Unless you have a codpiece to stick pins on. JULIA. Lucetta, as thou lov'st me, let me have What thou think'st meet, and is most mannerly. But tell me, wench, how will the world repute me For undertaking so unstaid a journey? I fear me it will make me scandaliz'd. LUCETTA. If you think so, then stay at home and go not. JULIA. Nay, that I will not. LUCETTA. Then never dream on infamy, but go. If Proteus like your journey when you come, No matter who's displeas'd when you are gone. I fear me he will scarce be pleas'd withal. JULIA. That is the least, Lucetta, of my fear: A thousand oaths, an ocean of his tears, And instances of infinite of love, Warrant me welcome to my Proteus. LUCETTA. All these are servants to deceitful men. JULIA. Base men that use them to so base effect! But truer stars did govern Proteus' birth; His words are bonds, his oaths are oracles, His love sincere, his thoughts immaculate, His tears pure messengers sent from his heart, His heart as far from fraud as heaven from earth. LUCETTA. Pray heav'n he prove so when you come to him. JULIA. Now, as thou lov'st me, do him not that wrong To bear a hard opinion of his truth; Only deserve my love by loving him. And presently go with me to my chamber, To take a note of what I stand in need of To furnish me upon my longing journey. All that is mine I leave at thy dispose, My goods, my lands, my reputation; Only, in lieu thereof, dispatch me hence. Come, answer not, but to it presently! I am impatient of my tarriance. [Exeunt.] ACT 3. SCENE I. Milan. An anteroom in the DUKE'S palace. [Enter DUKE, THURIO, and PROTEUS.] DUKE. Sir Thurio, give us leave, I pray, awhile; We have some secrets to confer about. [Exit THURIO.] Now tell me, Proteus, what's your will with me? PROTEUS. My gracious lord, that which I would discover The law of friendship bids me to conceal; But, when I call to mind your gracious favours Done to me, undeserving as I am, My duty pricks me on to utter that Which else no worldly good should draw from me. Know, worthy prince, Sir Valentine, my friend, This night intends to steal away your daughter; Myself am one made privy to the plot. I know you have determin'd to bestow her On Thurio, whom your gentle daughter hates; And should she thus be stol'n away from you, It would be much vexation to your age. Thus, for my duty's sake, I rather chose To cross my friend in his intended drift Than, by concealing it, heap on your head A pack of sorrows which would press you down, Being unprevented, to your timeless grave. DUKE. Proteus, I thank thee for thine honest care, Which to requite, command me while I live. This love of theirs myself have often seen, Haply when they have judg'd me fast asleep, And oftentimes have purpos'd to forbid Sir Valentine her company and my court; But, fearing lest my jealous aim might err And so, unworthily, disgrace the man, - A rashness that I ever yet have shunn'd, - I gave him gentle looks, thereby to find That which thyself hast now disclos'd to me. And, that thou mayst perceive my fear of this, Knowing that tender youth is soon suggested, I nightly lodge her in an upper tower, The key whereof myself have ever kept; And thence she cannot be convey'd away. PROTEUS. Know, noble lord, they have devis'd a mean How he her chamber window will ascend And with a corded ladder fetch her down; For which the youthful lover now is gone, And this way comes he with it presently; Where, if it please you, you may intercept him. But, good my lord, do it so cunningly That my discovery be not aimed at; For love of you, not hate unto my friend, Hath made me publisher of this pretence. DUKE. Upon mine honour, he shall never know That I had any light from thee of this. PROTEUS. Adieu, my lord; Sir Valentine is coming. [Exit.] [Enter VALENTINE] DUKE. Sir Valentine, whither away so fast? VALENTINE. Please it your Grace, there is a messenger That stays to bear my letters to my friends, And I am going to deliver them. DUKE. Be they of much import? VALENTINE. The tenour of them doth but signify My health and happy being at your court. DUKE. Nay then, no matter; stay with me awhile; I am to break with thee of some affairs That touch me near, wherein thou must be secret. 'Tis not unknown to thee that I have sought To match my friend Sir Thurio to my daughter. VALENTINE. I know it well, my lord; and, sure, the match Were rich and honourable; besides, the gentleman Is full of virtue, bounty, worth, and qualities Beseeming such a wife as your fair daughter. Cannot your grace win her to fancy him? DUKE. No, trust me; she is peevish, sullen, froward, Proud, disobedient, stubborn, lacking duty; Neither regarding that she is my child Nor fearing me as if I were her father; And, may I say to thee, this pride of hers, Upon advice, hath drawn my love from her; And, where I thought the remnant of mine age Should have been cherish'd by her childlike duty, I now am full resolv'd to take a wife And turn her out to who will take her in. Then let her beauty be her wedding-dower; For me and my possessions she esteems not. VALENTINE. What would your Grace have me to do in this? DUKE. There is a lady of Verona here, Whom I affect; but she is nice, and coy, And nought esteems my aged eloquence. Now, therefore, would I have thee to my tutor, For long agone I have forgot to court; Besides, the fashion of the time is chang'd, How and which way I may bestow myself To be regarded in her sun-bright eye. VALENTINE. Win her with gifts, if she respect not words: Dumb jewels often in their silent kind More than quick words do move a woman's mind. DUKE. But she did scorn a present that I sent her. VALENTINE. A woman sometime scorns what best contents her. Send her another; never give her o'er, For scorn at first makes after-love the more. If she do frown, 'tis not in hate of you, But rather to beget more love in you; If she do chide, 'tis not to have you gone; For why, the fools are mad if left alone. Take no repulse, whatever she doth say; For 'Get you gone' she doth not mean 'Away!' Flatter and praise, commend, extol their graces; Though ne'er so black, say they have angels' faces. That man that hath a tongue, I say, is no man, If with his tongue he cannot win a woman. DUKE. But she I mean is promis'd by her friends Unto a youthful gentleman of worth; And kept severely from resort of men, That no man hath access by day to her. VALENTINE. Why then I would resort to her by night. DUKE. Ay, but the doors be lock'd and keys kept safe, That no man hath recourse to her by night. VALENTINE. What lets but one may enter at her window? DUKE. Her chamber is aloft, far from the ground, And built so shelving that one cannot climb it Without apparent hazard of his life. VALENTINE. Why then a ladder, quaintly made of cords, To cast up with a pair of anchoring hooks, Would serve to scale another Hero's tow'r, So bold Leander would adventure it. DUKE. Now, as thou art a gentleman of blood, Advise me where I may have such a ladder. VALENTINE. When would you use it? Pray, sir, tell me that. DUKE. This very night; for Love is like a child, That longs for everything that he can come by. VALENTINE. By seven o'clock I'll get you such a ladder. DUKE. But, hark thee; I will go to her alone; How shall I best convey the ladder thither? VALENTINE. It will be light, my lord, that you may bear it Under a cloak that is of any length. DUKE. A cloak as long as thine will serve the turn? VALENTINE. Ay, my good lord. DUKE. Then let me see thy cloak. I'll get me one of such another length. VALENTINE. Why, any cloak will serve the turn, my lord. DUKE. How shall I fashion me to wear a cloak? I pray thee, let me feel thy cloak upon me. [Pulls open VALENTINE'S cloak.] What letter is this same? What's here? - 'To Silvia'! And here an engine fit for my proceeding! I'll be so bold to break the seal for once. 'My thoughts do harbour with my Silvia nightly, And slaves they are to me, that send them flying. O! could their master come and go as lightly, Himself would lodge where, senseless, they are lying! My herald thoughts in thy pure bosom rest them, While I, their king, that thither them importune, Do curse the grace that with such grace hath blest them, Because myself do want my servants' fortune. I curse myself, for they are sent by me, That they should harbour where their lord should be.' What's here? 'Silvia, this night I will enfranchise thee.' 'Tis so; and here's the ladder for the purpose. Why, Phaethon - for thou art Merops' son - Wilt thou aspire to guide the heavenly car, And with thy daring folly burn the world? Wilt thou reach stars because they shine on thee? Go, base intruder! over-weening slave! Bestow thy fawning smiles on equal mates, And think my patience, more than thy desert, Is privilege for thy departure hence. Thank me for this more than for all the favours Which, all too much, I have bestow'd on thee. But if thou linger in my territories Longer than swiftest expedition Will give thee time to leave our royal court, By heaven! my wrath shall far exceed the love I ever bore my daughter or thyself. Be gone! I will not hear thy vain excuse; But, as thou lov'st thy life, make speed from hence. [Exit.] VALENTINE. And why not death rather than living torment? To die is to be banish'd from myself, And Silvia is myself; banish'd from her Is self from self, - a deadly banishment! What light is light, if Silvia be not seen? What joy is joy, if Silvia be not by? Unless it be to think that she is by, And feed upon the shadow of perfection. Except I be by Silvia in the night, There is no music in the nightingale; Unless I look on Silvia in the day, There is no day for me to look upon. She is my essence, and I leave to be If I be not by her fair influence Foster'd, illumin'd, cherish'd, kept alive. I fly not death, to fly his deadly doom: Tarry I here, I but attend on death; But fly I hence, I fly away from life. [Enter PROTEUS and LAUNCE.] PROTEUS. Run, boy; run, run, seek him out. LAUNCE. Soho! soho! PROTEUS. What seest thou? LAUNCE. Him we go to find: there's not a hair on 's head but 'tis a Valentine. PROTEUS. Valentine? VALENTINE. No. PROTEUS. Who then? his spirit? VALENTINE. Neither. PROTEUS. What then? VALENTINE. Nothing. LAUNCE. Can nothing speak? Master, shall I strike? PROTEUS. Who wouldst thou strike? LAUNCE. Nothing. PROTEUS. Villain, forbear. LAUNCE. Why, sir, I'll strike nothing. I pray you, - PROTEUS. Sirrah, I say, forbear. - Friend Valentine, a word. VALENTINE. My ears are stopp'd and cannot hear good news, So much of bad already hath possess'd them. PROTEUS. Then in dumb silence will I bury mine, For they are harsh, untuneable, and bad. VALENTINE. Is Silvia dead? PROTEUS. No, Valentine. VALENTINE. No Valentine, indeed, for sacred Silvia. Hath she forsworn me? PROTEUS. No, Valentine. VALENTINE. No Valentine, if Silvia have forsworn me. What is your news? LAUNCE. Sir, there is a proclamation that you are vanished. PROTEUS. That thou art banished, O, that's the news, From hence, from Silvia, and from me thy friend. VALENTINE. O, I have fed upon this woe already, And now excess of it will make me surfeit. Doth Silvia know that I am banished? PROTEUS. Ay, ay; and she hath offer'd to the doom - Which, unrevers'd, stands in effectual force - A sea of melting pearl, which some call tears; Those at her father's churlish feet she tender'd; With them, upon her knees, her humble self, Wringing her hands, whose whiteness so became them As if but now they waxed pale for woe: But neither bended knees, pure hands held up, Sad sighs, deep groans, nor silver-shedding tears, Could penetrate her uncompassionate sire; But Valentine, if he be ta'en, must die. Besides, her intercession chaf'd him so, When she for thy repeal was suppliant, That to close prison he commanded her, With many bitter threats of biding there. VALENTINE. No more; unless the next word that thou speak'st Have some malignant power upon my life: If so, I pray thee breathe it in mine ear, As ending anthem of my endless dolour. PROTEUS. Cease to lament for that thou canst not help, And study help for that which thou lament'st. Time is the nurse and breeder of all good. Here if thou stay thou canst not see thy love; Besides, thy staying will abridge thy life. Hope is a lover's staff; walk hence with that And manage it against despairing thoughts. Thy letters may be here, though thou art hence, Which, being writ to me, shall be deliver'd Even in the milk-white bosom of thy love. The time now serves not to expostulate: Come, I'll convey thee through the city-gate; And, ere I part with thee, confer at large Of all that may concern thy love-affairs. As thou lov'st Silvia, though not for thyself, Regard thy danger, and along with me! VALENTINE. I pray thee, Launce, an if thou seest my boy, Bid him make haste and meet me at the North-gate. PROTEUS. Go, sirrah, find him out. Come, Valentine. VALENTINE. O my dear Silvia! Hapless Valentine! [Exeunt VALENTINE and PROTEUS.] LAUNCE. I am but a fool, look you, and yet I have the wit to think my master is a kind of a knave; but that's all one if he be but one knave. He lives not now that knows me to be in love; yet I am in love; but a team of horse shall not pluck that from me; nor who 'tis I love; and yet 'tis a woman; but what woman I will not tell myself; and yet 'tis a milkmaid; yet 'tis not a maid, for she hath had gossips; yet 'tis a maid, for she is her master's maid and serves for wages. She hath more qualities than a water-spaniel - which is much in a bare Christian. [Pulling out a paper.] Here is the catelog of her condition. 'Inprimis: She can fetch and carry.' Why, a horse can do no more: nay, a horse cannot fetch, but only carry; therefore is she better than a jade. 'Item: She can milk.' Look you, a sweet virtue in a maid with clean hands. [Enter SPEED.] SPEED. How now, Signior Launce! What news with your mastership? LAUNCE. With my master's ship? Why, it is at sea. SPEED. Well, your old vice still: mistake the word. What news, then, in your paper? LAUNCE. The blackest news that ever thou heardest. SPEED. Why, man? how black? LAUNCE. Why, as black as ink. SPEED. Let me read them. LAUNCE. Fie on thee, jolthead! thou canst not read. SPEED. Thou liest; I can. LAUNCE. I will try thee. Tell me this: who begot thee? SPEED. Marry, the son of my grandfather. LAUNCE. O, illiterate loiterer! It was the son of thy grandmother. This proves that thou canst not read. SPEED. Come, fool, come; try me in thy paper. LAUNCE. There; and Saint Nicholas be thy speed! SPEED. 'Inprimis, She can milk.' LAUNCE. Ay, that she can. SPEED. 'Item, She brews good ale.' LAUNCE. And thereof comes the proverb, 'Blessing of your heart, you brew good ale.' SPEED. 'Item, She can sew.' LAUNCE. That's as much as to say 'Can she so?' SPEED. 'Item, She can knit.' LAUNCE. What need a man care for a stock with a wench, when she can knit him a stock? SPEED. 'Item, She can wash and scour.' LAUNCE. A special virtue; for then she need not be washed and scoured. SPEED. 'Item, She can spin.' LAUNCE. Then may I set the world on wheels, when she can spin for her living. SPEED. 'Item, She hath many nameless virtues.' LAUNCE. That's as much as to say, bastard virtues; that indeed know not their fathers, and therefore have no names. SPEED. 'Here follow her vices.' LAUNCE. Close at the heels of her virtues. SPEED. 'Item, She is not to be kissed fasting, in respect of her breath.' LAUNCE. Well, that fault may be mended with a breakfast. Read on. SPEED. 'Item, She hath a sweet mouth.' LAUNCE. That makes amends for her sour breath. SPEED. 'Item, She doth talk in her sleep.' LAUNCE. It's no matter for that, so she sleep not in her talk. SPEED. 'Item, She is slow in words.' LAUNCE. O villain, that set this down among her vices! To be slow in words is a woman's only virtue. I pray thee, out with't; and place it for her chief virtue. SPEED. 'Item, She is proud.' LAUNCE. Out with that too: it was Eve's legacy, and cannot be ta'en from her. SPEED. 'Item, She hath no teeth.' LAUNCE. I care not for that neither, because I love crusts. SPEED. 'Item, She is curst.' LAUNCE. Well; the best is, she hath no teeth to bite. SPEED. 'Item, She will often praise her liquor.' LAUNCE. If her liquor be good, she shall: if she will not, I will; for good things should be praised. SPEED. 'Item, She is too liberal.' LAUNCE. Of her tongue she cannot, for that's writ down she is slow of; of her purse she shall not, for that I'll keep shut. Now of another thing she may, and that cannot I help. Well, proceed. SPEED. 'Item, She hath more hair than wit, and more faults than hairs, and more wealth than faults.' LAUNCE. Stop there; I'll have her; she was mine, and not mine, twice or thrice in that last article. Rehearse that once more. SPEED. 'Item, She hath more hair than wit' - LAUNCE. More hair than wit it may be; I'll prove it: the cover of the salt hides the salt, and therefore it is more than the salt; the hair that covers the wit is more than the wit, for the greater hides the less. What's next? SPEED. 'And more faults than hairs.' - LAUNCE. That's monstrous! O, that that were out! SPEED. 'And more wealth than faults.' LAUNCE. Why, that word makes the faults gracious. Well, I'll have her; an if it be a match, as nothing is impossible, - SPEED. What then? LAUNCE. Why, then will I tell thee, - that thy master stays for thee at the North-gate. SPEED. For me? LAUNCE. For thee! ay, who art thou? He hath stay'd for a better man than thee. SPEED. And must I go to him? LAUNCE. Thou must run to him, for thou hast stayed so long that going will scarce serve the turn. SPEED. Why didst not tell me sooner? Pox of your love letters! [Exit.] LAUNCE. Now will he be swing'd for reading my letter. An unmannerly slave that will thrust himself into secrets! I'll after, to rejoice in the boy's correction. [Exit.] SCENE 2. The same. A room in the DUKE'S palace. [Enter DUKE and THURIO.] DUKE. Sir Thurio, fear not but that she will love you Now Valentine is banish'd from her sight. THURIO. Since his exile she hath despis'd me most, Forsworn my company and rail'd at me, That I am desperate of obtaining her. DUKE. This weak impress of love is as a figure Trenched in ice, which with an hour's heat Dissolves to water and doth lose his form. A little time will melt her frozen thoughts, And worthless Valentine shall be forgot. [Enter PROTEUS.] How now, Sir Proteus! Is your countryman, According to our proclamation, gone? PROTEUS. Gone, my good lord. DUKE. My daughter takes his going grievously. PROTEUS. A little time, my lord, will kill that grief. DUKE. So I believe; but Thurio thinks not so. Proteus, the good conceit I hold of thee, - For thou hast shown some sign of good desert, - Makes me the better to confer with thee. PROTEUS. Longer than I prove loyal to your Grace Let me not live to look upon your Grace. DUKE. Thou know'st how willingly I would effect The match between Sir Thurio and my daughter. PROTEUS. I do, my lord. DUKE. And also, I think, thou art not ignorant How she opposes her against my will. PROTEUS. She did, my lord, when Valentine was here. DUKE. Ay, and perversely she persevers so. What might we do to make the girl forget The love of Valentine, and love Sir Thurio? PROTEUS. The best way is to slander Valentine With falsehood, cowardice, and poor descent, Three things that women highly hold in hate. DUKE. Ay, but she'll think that it is spoke in hate. PROTEUS. Ay, if his enemy deliver it; Therefore it must with circumstance be spoken By one whom she esteemeth as his friend. DUKE. Then you must undertake to slander him. PROTEUS. And that, my lord, I shall be loath to do: 'Tis an ill office for a gentleman, Especially against his very friend. DUKE. Where your good word cannot advantage him, Your slander never can endamage him; Therefore the office is indifferent, Being entreated to it by your friend. PROTEUS. You have prevail'd, my lord; if I can do it By aught that I can speak in his dispraise, She shall not long continue love to him. But say this weed her love from Valentine, It follows not that she will love Sir Thurio. THURIO. Therefore, as you unwind her love from him, Lest it should ravel and be good to none, You must provide to bottom it on me; Which must be done by praising me as much As you in worth dispraise Sir Valentine. DUKE. And, Proteus, we dare trust you in this kind, Because we know, on Valentine's report, You are already Love's firm votary And cannot soon revolt and change your mind. Upon this warrant shall you have access Where you with Silvia may confer at large; For she is lumpish, heavy, melancholy, And, for your friend's sake, will be glad of you; Where you may temper her by your persuasion To hate young Valentine and love my friend. PROTEUS. As much as I can do I will effect. But you, Sir Thurio, are not sharp enough; You must lay lime to tangle her desires By wailful sonnets, whose composed rhymes Should be full-fraught with serviceable vows. DUKE. Ay, Much is the force of heaven-bred poesy. PROTEUS. Say that upon the altar of her beauty You sacrifice your tears, your sighs, your heart. Write till your ink be dry, and with your tears Moist it again, and frame some feeling line That may discover such integrity: For Orpheus' lute was strung with poets' sinews, Whose golden touch could soften steel and stones, Make tigers tame, and huge leviathans Forsake unsounded deeps to dance on sands. After your dire-lamenting elegies, Visit by night your lady's chamber-window With some sweet consort: to their instruments Tune a deploring dump; the night's dead silence Will well become such sweet-complaining grievance. This, or else nothing, will inherit her. DUKE. This discipline shows thou hast been in love. THURIO. And thy advice this night I'll put in practice. Therefore, sweet Proteus, my direction-giver, Let us into the city presently To sort some gentlemen well skill'd in music. I have a sonnet that will serve the turn To give the onset to thy good advice. DUKE. About it, gentlemen! PROTEUS. We'll wait upon your Grace till after-supper, And afterward determine our proceedings. DUKE. Even now about it! I will pardon you. [Exeunt.] ACT 4. SCENE 1. A forest between Milan and Verona. [Enter certain OUTLAWS.] FIRST OUTLAW. Fellows, stand fast; I see a passenger. SECOND OUTLAW. If there be ten, shrink not, but down with 'em. [Enter VALENTINE and SPEED.] THIRD OUTLAW. Stand, sir, and throw us that you have about ye; If not, we'll make you sit, and rifle you. SPEED. Sir, we are undone: these are the villains That all the travellers do fear so much. VALENTINE. My friends, - FIRST OUTLAW. That's not so, sir; we are your enemies. SECOND OUTLAW. Peace! we'll hear him. THIRD OUTLAW. Ay, by my beard, will we, for he is a proper man. VALENTINE. Then know that I have little wealth to lose; A man I am cross'd with adversity; My riches are these poor habiliments, Of which if you should here disfurnish me, You take the sum and substance that I have. SECOND OUTLAW. Whither travel you? VALENTINE. To Verona. FIRST OUTLAW. Whence came you? VALENTINE. From Milan. THIRD OUTLAW. Have you long sojourn'd there? VALENTINE. Some sixteen months, and longer might have stay'd, If crooked fortune had not thwarted me. FIRST OUTLAW. What! were you banish'd thence? VALENTINE. I was. SECOND OUTLAW. For what offence? VALENTINE. For that which now torments me to rehearse: I kill'd a man, whose death I much repent; But yet I slew him manfully in fight, Without false vantage or base treachery. FIRST OUTLAW. Why, ne'er repent it, if it were done so. But were you banish'd for so small a fault? VALENTINE. I was, and held me glad of such a doom. SECOND OUTLAW. Have you the tongues? VALENTINE. My youthful travel therein made me happy, Or else I often had been miserable. THIRD OUTLAW. By the bare scalp of Robin Hood's fat friar, This fellow were a king for our wild faction! FIRST OUTLAW. We'll have him: Sirs, a word. SPEED. Master, be one of them; it's an honourable kind of thievery. VALENTINE. Peace, villain! SECOND OUTLAW. Tell us this: have you anything to take to? VALENTINE. Nothing but my fortune. THIRD OUTLAW. Know, then, that some of us are gentlemen, Such as the fury of ungovern'd youth Thrust from the company of awful men: Myself was from Verona banished For practising to steal away a lady, An heir, and near allied unto the duke. SECOND OUTLAW. And I from Mantua, for a gentleman Who, in my mood, I stabb'd unto the heart. FIRST OUTLAW. And I for such-like petty crimes as these. But to the purpose; for we cite our faults, That they may hold excus'd our lawless lives; And, partly, seeing you are beautified With goodly shape, and by your own report A linguist, and a man of such perfection As we do in our quality much want - SECOND OUTLAW. Indeed, because you are a banish'd man, Therefore, above the rest, we parley to you. Are you content to be our general? To make a virtue of necessity And live as we do in this wilderness? THIRD OUTLAW. What say'st thou? Wilt thou be of our consort? Say 'ay' and be the captain of us all: We'll do thee homage, and be rul'd by thee, Love thee as our commander and our king. FIRST OUTLAW. But if thou scorn our courtesy thou diest. SECOND OUTLAW. Thou shalt not live to brag what we have offer'd. VALENTINE. I take your offer, and will live with you, Provided that you do no outrages On silly women or poor passengers. THIRD OUTLAW. No, we detest such vile base practices. Come, go with us; we'll bring thee to our crews, And show thee all the treasure we have got; Which, with ourselves, all rest at thy dispose. [Exeunt.] SCENE 2. Milan. The sourt of the DUKE'S palace. [Enter PROTEUS.] PROTEUS. Already have I been false to Valentine, And now I must be as unjust to Thurio. Under the colour of commending him, I have access my own love to prefer: But Silvia is too fair, too true, too holy, To be corrupted with my worthless gifts. When I protest true loyalty to her, She twits me with my falsehood to my friend; When to her beauty I commend my vows, She bids me think how I have been forsworn In breaking faith with Julia whom I lov'd; And notwithstanding all her sudden quips, The least whereof would quell a lover's hope, Yet, spaniel-like, the more she spurns my love The more it grows and fawneth on her still. But here comes Thurio. Now must we to her window, And give some evening music to her ear. [Enter THURIO and Musicians.] THURIO. How now, Sir Proteus! are you crept before us? PROTEUS. Ay, gentle Thurio; for you know that love Will creep in service where it cannot go. THURIO. Ay, but I hope, sir, that you love not here. PROTEUS. Sir, but I do; or else I would be hence. THURIO. Who? Silvia? PROTEUS. Ay, Silvia, for your sake. THURIO. I thank you for your own. Now, gentlemen, Let's tune, and to it lustily awhile. [Enter Host, and JULIA in boy's clothes.] HOST. Now, my young guest, methinks you're allycholly; I pray you, why is it? JULIA. Marry, mine host, because I cannot be merry. HOST. Come, we'll have you merry; I'll bring you where you shall hear music, and see the gentleman that you asked for. JULIA. But shall I hear him speak? HOST. Ay, that you shall. JULIA. That will be music. [Music plays.] HOST. Hark! hark! JULIA. Is he among these? HOST. Ay; but peace! let's hear 'em. [SONG] Who is Silvia? What is she, That all our swains commend her? Holy, fair, and wise is she; The heaven such grace did lend her, That she might admired be. Is she kind as she is fair? For beauty lives with kindness. Love doth to her eyes repair, To help him of his blindness; And, being help'd, inhabits there. Then to Silvia let us sing That Silvia is excelling; She excels each mortal thing Upon the dull earth dwelling. ' To her let us garlands bring. HOST. How now, are you sadder than you were before? How do you, man? The music likes you not. JULIA. You mistake; the musician likes me not. HOST. Why, my pretty youth? JULIA. He plays false, father. HOST. How? out of tune on the strings? JULIA. Not so; but yet so false that he grieves my very heart-strings. HOST. You have a quick ear. JULIA. Ay, I would I were deaf; it makes me have a slow heart. HOST. I perceive you delight not in music. JULIA. Not a whit, - when it jars so. HOST. Hark! what fine change is in the music! JULIA. Ay, that change is the spite. HOST. You would have them always play but one thing? JULIA. I would always have one play but one thing. But, Host, doth this Sir Proteus, that we talk on, Often resort unto this gentlewoman? HOST. I tell you what Launce, his man, told me: he lov'd her out of all nick. JULIA. Where is Launce? HOST. Gone to seek his dog, which to-morrow, by his master's command, he must carry for a present to his lady. JULIA. Peace! stand aside: the company parts. PROTEUS. Sir Thurio, fear not you; I will so plead That you shall say my cunning drift excels. THURIO. Where meet we? PROTEUS. At Saint Gregory's well. THURIO. Farewell. [Exeunt THURIO and Musicians.] [Enter SILVIA above, at her window.] PROTEUS. Madam, good even to your ladyship. SILVIA. I thank you for your music, gentlemen. Who is that that spake? PROTEUS. One, lady, if you knew his pure heart's truth, You would quickly learn to know him by his voice. SILVIA. Sir Proteus, as I take it. PROTEUS. Sir Proteus, gentle lady, and your servant. SILVIA. What's your will? PROTEUS. That I may compass yours. SILVIA. You have your wish; my will is even this, That presently you hie you home to bed. Thou subtle, perjur'd, false, disloyal man! Think'st thou I am so shallow, so conceitless, To be seduced by thy flattery, That hast deceiv'd so many with thy vows? Return, return, and make thy love amends. For me, by this pale queen of night I swear, I am so far from granting thy request That I despise thee for thy wrongful suit, And by and by intend to chide myself Even for this time I spend in talking to thee. PROTEUS. I grant, sweet love, that I did love a lady; But she is dead. JULIA. [Aside] 'Twere false, if I should speak it; For I am sure she is not buried. SILVIA. Say that she be; yet Valentine, thy friend, Survives, to whom, thyself art witness, I am betroth'd; and art thou not asham'd To wrong him with thy importunacy? PROTEUS. I likewise hear that Valentine is dead. SILVIA. And so suppose am I; for in his grave, Assure thyself my love is buried. PROTEUS. Sweet lady, let me rake it from the earth. SILVIA. Go to thy lady's grave, and call hers thence; Or, at the least, in hers sepulchre thine. JULIA. [Aside] He heard not that. PROTEUS. Madam, if your heart be so obdurate, Vouchsafe me yet your picture for my love, The picture that is hanging in your chamber; To that I'll speak, to that I'll sigh and weep; For, since the substance of your perfect self Is else devoted, I am but a shadow; And to your shadow will I make true love. JULIA. [Aside] If 'twere a substance, you would, sure, deceive it And make it but a shadow, as I am. SILVIA. I am very loath to be your idol, sir; But since your falsehood shall become you well To worship shadows and adore false shapes, Send to me in the morning, and I'll send it; And so, good rest. PROTEUS. As wretches have o'ernight That wait for execution in the morn. [Exeunt PROTEUS and SILVIA, above.] JULIA. Host, will you go? HOST. By my halidom, I was fast asleep. JULIA. Pray you, where lies Sir Proteus? HOST. Marry, at my house. Trust me, I think 'tis almost day. JULIA. Not so; but it hath been the longest night That e'er I watch'd, and the most heaviest. [Exeunt.] SCENE 3. The same. [Enter EGLAMOUR.] EGLAMOUR. This is the hour that Madam Silvia Entreated me to call and know her mind: There's some great matter she'd employ me in. Madam, madam! [Enter SILVIA above, at her window.] SILVIA. Who calls? EGLAMOUR. Your servant and your friend; One that attends your ladyship's command. SILVIA. Sir Eglamour, a thousand times good morrow. EGLAMOUR. As many, worthy lady, to yourself. According to your ladyship's impose, I am thus early come to know what service It is your pleasure to command me in. SILVIA. O Eglamour, thou art a gentleman - Think not I flatter, for I swear I do not - Valiant, wise, remorseful, well accomplish'd. Thou art not ignorant what dear good will I bear unto the banish'd Valentine; Nor how my father would enforce me marry Vain Thurio, whom my very soul abhors. Thyself hast lov'd; and I have heard thee say No grief did ever come so near thy heart As when thy lady and thy true love died, Upon whose grave thou vow'dst pure chastity. Sir Eglamour, I would to Valentine, To Mantua, where I hear he makes abode; And, for the ways are dangerous to pass, I do desire thy worthy company, Upon whose faith and honour I repose. Urge not my father's anger, Eglamour, But think upon my grief, a lady's grief, And on the justice of my flying hence, To keep me from a most unholy match, Which heaven and fortune still rewards with plagues. I do desire thee, even from a heart As full of sorrows as the sea of sands, To bear me company and go with me; If not, to hide what I have said to thee, That I may venture to depart alone. EGLAMOUR. Madam, I pity much your grievances; Which since I know they virtuously are plac'd, I give consent to go along with you, Recking as little what betideth me As much I wish all good befortune you. When will you go? SILVIA. This evening coming. EGLAMOUR. Where shall I meet you? SILVIA. At Friar Patrick's cell, Where I intend holy confession. EGLAMOUR. I will not fail your ladyship. Good morrow, gentle lady. SILVIA. Good morrow, kind Sir Eglamour. [Exeunt severally.] SCENE 4. The same. [Enter LAUNCE with his dog.] LAUNCE. When a man's servant shall play the cur with him, look you, it goes hard; one that I brought up of a puppy; one that I saved from drowning, when three or four of his blind brothers and sisters went to it. I have taught him, even as one would say precisely 'Thus I would teach a dog.' I was sent to deliver him as a present to Mistress Silvia from my master; and I came no sooner into the dining-chamber, but he steps me to her trencher and steals her capon's leg. O! 'tis a foul thing when a cur cannot keep himself in all companies! I would have, as one should say, one that takes upon him to be a dog indeed, to be, as it were, a dog at all things. If I had not had more wit than he, to take a fault upon me that he did, I think verily he had been hang'd for't; sure as I live, he had suffer'd for't; you shall judge. He thrusts me himself into the company of three or four gentleman-like dogs under the duke's table; he had not been there - bless the mark, a pissing-while, but all the chamber smelt him. 'Out with the dog!' says one; 'What cur is that?' says another; 'Whip him out' says the third; 'Hang him up' says the duke. I, having been acquainted with the smell before, knew it was Crab, and goes me to the fellow that whips the dogs: 'Friend,' quoth I 'you mean to whip the dog?' 'Ay, marry do I,' quoth he. 'You do him the more wrong,' quoth I; "twas I did the thing you wot of.' He makes me no more ado, but whips me out of the chamber. How many masters would do this for his servant? Nay, I'll be sworn, I have sat in the stock for puddings he hath stolen, otherwise he had been executed; I have stood on the pillory for geese he hath killed, otherwise he had suffered for't. Thou think'st not of this now. Nay, I remember the trick you serv'd me when I took my leave of Madam Silvia: did not I bid thee still mark me and do as I do? When didst thou see me heave up my leg and make water against a gentlewoman's farthingale? Didst thou ever see me do such a trick? [Enter PROTEUS, and JULIA in boy's clothes.] PROTEUS. Sebastian is thy name? I like thee well, And will employ thee in some service presently. JULIA. In what you please; I'll do what I can. PROTEUS. I hope thou wilt. [To LAUNCE] How now, you whoreson peasant! Where have you been these two days loitering? LAUNCE. Marry, sir, I carried Mistress Silvia the dog you bade me. PROTEUS. And what says she to my little jewel? LAUNCE. Marry, she says your dog was a cur, and tells you currish thanks is good enough for such a present. PROTEUS. But she received my dog? LAUNCE. No, indeed, did she not: here have I brought him back again. PROTEUS. What! didst thou offer her this from me? LAUNCE. Ay, sir; the other squirrel was stolen from me by the hangman boys in the market-place; and then I offered her mine own, who is a dog as big as ten of yours, and therefore the gift the greater. PROTEUS. Go, get thee hence and find my dog again, Or ne'er return again into my sight. Away, I say. Stayest thou to vex me here? A slave that still an end turns me to shame! [Exit LAUNCE.] Sebastian, I have entertained thee Partly that I have need of such a youth That can with some discretion do my business, For 'tis no trusting to yond foolish lout; But chiefly for thy face and thy behaviour, Which, if my augury deceive me not, Witness good bringing up, fortune, and truth: Therefore, know thou, for this I entertain thee. Go presently, and take this ring with thee, Deliver it to Madam Silvia: She lov'd me well deliver'd it to me. JULIA. It seems you lov'd not her, to leave her token. She's dead, belike? PROTEUS. Not so: I think she lives. JULIA. Alas! PROTEUS. Why dost thou cry 'Alas'? JULIA. I cannot choose But pity her. PROTEUS. Wherefore shouldst thou pity her? JULIA. Because methinks that she lov'd you as well As you do love your lady Silvia. She dreams on him that has forgot her love: You dote on her that cares not for your love. 'Tis pity love should be so contrary; And thinking on it makes me cry 'alas!' PROTEUS. Well, give her that ring, and therewithal This letter: that's her chamber. Tell my lady I claim the promise for her heavenly picture. Your message done, hie home unto my chamber, Where thou shalt find me sad and solitary. [Exit.] JULIA. How many women would do such a message? Alas, poor Proteus! thou hast entertain'd A fox to be the shepherd of thy lambs. Alas, poor fool! why do I pity him That with his very heart despiseth me? Because he loves her, he despiseth me; Because I love him, I must pity him. This ring I gave him, when he parted from me, To bind him to remember my good will; And now am I - unhappy messenger - To plead for that which I would not obtain, To carry that which I would have refus'd, To praise his faith, which I would have disprais'd. I am my master's true-confirmed love, But cannot be true servant to my master Unless I prove false traitor to myself. Yet will I woo for him, but yet so coldly As, heaven it knows, I would not have him speed. [Enter SILVIA, attended.] Gentlewoman, good day! I pray you be my mean To bring me where to speak with Madam Silvia. SILVIA. What would you with her, if that I be she? JULIA. If you be she, I do entreat your patience To hear me speak the message I am sent on. SILVIA. From whom? JULIA. From my master, Sir Proteus, madam. SILVIA. O! he sends you for a picture? JULIA. Ay, madam. SILVIA. Ursula, bring my picture there. [A picture brought.] Go, give your master this. Tell him from me, One Julia, that his changing thoughts forget, Would better fit his chamber than this shadow. JULIA. Madam, please you peruse this letter. - Pardon me, madam; I have unadvis'd Deliver'd you a paper that I should not: This is the letter to your ladyship. SILVIA. I pray thee, let me look on that again. JULIA. It may not be: good madam, pardon me. SILVIA. There, hold. I will not look upon your master's lines: I know they are stuff'd with protestations And full of new-found oaths, which he will break As easily as I do tear his paper. JULIA. Madam, he sends your ladyship this ring. SILVIA. The more shame for him that he sends it me; For I have heard him say a thousand times His Julia gave it him at his departure. Though his false finger have profan'd the ring, Mine shall not do his Julia so much wrong. JULIA. She thanks you. SILVIA. What say'st thou? JULIA. I thank you, madam, that you tender her. Poor gentlewoman, my master wrongs her much. SILVIA. Dost thou know her? JULIA. Almost as well as I do know myself: To think upon her woes, I do protest That I have wept a hundred several times. SILVIA. Belike she thinks, that Proteus hath forsook her. JULIA. I think she doth, and that's her cause of sorrow. SILVIA. Is she not passing fair? JULIA. She hath been fairer, madam, than she is. When she did think my master lov'd her well, She, in my judgment, was as fair as you; But since she did neglect her looking-glass And threw her sun-expelling mask away, The air hath starv'd the roses in her cheeks And pinch'd the lily-tincture of her face, That now she is become as black as I. SILVIA. How tall was she? JULIA. About my stature; for at Pentecost, When all our pageants of delight were play'd, Our youth got me to play the woman's part, And I was trimm'd in Madam Julia's gown, Which served me as fit, by all men's judgments, As if the garment had been made for me: Therefore I know she is about my height. And at that time I made her weep agood; For I did play a lamentable part. Madam, 'twas Ariadne passioning For Theseus' perjury and unjust flight; Which I so lively acted with my tears That my poor mistress, mov'd therewithal, Wept bitterly; and would I might be dead If I in thought felt not her very sorrow! SILVIA. She is beholding to thee, gentle youth. - Alas, poor lady, desolate and left! I weep myself, to think upon thy words. Here, youth, there is my purse; I give thee this For thy sweet mistress' sake, because thou lov'st her. Farewell. JULIA. And she shall thank you for't, if e'er you know her. - [Exit SILVIA with ATTENDANTS] A virtuous gentlewoman, mild and beautiful! I hope my master's suit will be but cold, Since she respects my mistress' love so much. Alas, how love can trifle with itself! Here is her picture; let me see. I think, If I had such a tire, this face of mine Were full as lovely as is this of hers; And yet the painter flatter'd her a little, Unless I flatter with myself too much. Her hair is auburn, mine is perfect yellow: If that be all the difference in his love, I'll get me such a colour'd periwig. Her eyes are grey as glass, and so are mine; Ay, but her forehead's low, and mine's as high. What should it be that he respects in her But I can make respective in myself, If this fond Love were not a blinded god? Come, shadow, come, and take this shadow up, For 'tis thy rival. O thou senseless form! Thou shalt be worshipp'd, kiss'd, lov'd, and ador'd, And, were there sense in his idolatry, My substance should be statue in thy stead. I'll use thee kindly for thy mistress' sake, That us'd me so; or else, by Jove I vow, I should have scratch'd out your unseeing eyes, To make my master out of love with thee. [Exit.] ACT 5. SCENE I. Milan. An abbey [Enter EGLAMOUR.] EGLAMOUR. The sun begins to gild the western sky, And now it is about the very hour That Silvia at Friar Patrick's cell should meet me. She will not fail; for lovers break not hours Unless it be to come before their time, So much they spur their expedition. See, where she comes. [Enter SILVIA.] Lady, a happy evening! SILVIA. Amen, amen! Go on, good Eglamour, Out at the postern by the abbey wall. I fear I am attended by some spies. EGLAMOUR. Fear not: the forest is not three leagues off; If we recover that, we are sure enough. [Exeunt.] SCENE 2. The same. A room in the DUKE'S palace. [Enter THURIO, PROTEUS, and JULIA.] THURIO. Sir Proteus, what says Silvia to my suit? PROTEUS. O, sir, I find her milder than she was; And yet she takes exceptions at your person. THURIO. What! that my leg is too long? PROTEUS. No; that it is too little. THURIO. I'll wear a boot to make it somewhat rounder. JULIA. [Aside] But love will not be spurr'd to what it loathes. THURIO. What says she to my face? PROTEUS. She says it is a fair one. THURIO. Nay, then, the wanton lies; my face is black. PROTEUS. But pearls are fair; and the old saying is: 'Black men are pearls in beauteous ladies' eyes.' JULIA. [Aside] 'Tis true, such pearls as put out ladies' eyes; For I had rather wink than look on them. THURIO. How likes she my discourse? PROTEUS. Ill, when you talk of war. THURIO. But well when I discourse of love and peace? JULIA. [Aside] But better, indeed, when you hold your peace. THURIO. What says she to my valour? PROTEUS. O, sir, she makes no doubt of that. JULIA. [Aside] She needs not, when she knows it cowardice. THURIO. What says she to my birth? PROTEUS. That you are well deriv'd. JULIA. [Aside] True; from a gentleman to a fool. THURIO. Considers she my possessions? PROTEUS. O, ay; and pities them. THURIO. Wherefore? JULIA. [Aside] That such an ass should owe them. PROTEUS. That they are out by lease. JULIA. Here comes the duke. [Enter DUKE.] DUKE. How now, Sir Proteus! how now, Thurio! Which of you saw Sir Eglamour of late? THURIO. Not I. PROTEUS. Nor I. DUKE. Saw you my daughter? PROTEUS. Neither. DUKE. Why then, She's fled unto that peasant Valentine; And Eglamour is in her company. 'Tis true; for Friar Lawrence met them both As he in penance wander'd through the forest; Him he knew well, and guess'd that it was she, But, being mask'd, he was not sure of it; Besides, she did intend confession At Patrick's cell this even; and there she was not. These likelihoods confirm her flight from hence. Therefore, I pray you, stand not to discourse, But mount you presently, and meet with me Upon the rising of the mountain-foot That leads toward Mantua, whither they are fled. Dispatch, sweet gentlemen, and follow me. [Exit.] THURIO. Why, this it is to be a peevish girl That flies her fortune when it follows her. I'll after, more to be reveng'd on Eglamour Than for the love of reckless Silvia. [Exit.] PROTEUS. And I will follow, more for Silvia's love Than hate of Eglamour, that goes with her. [Exit.] JULIA. And I will follow, more to cross that love Than hate for Silvia, that is gone for love. [Exit.] SCENE 3. Frontiers of Mantua. The forest. [Enter OUTLAWS with SILVA.] FIRST OUTLAW. Come, come. Be patient; we must bring you to our captain. SILVIA. A thousand more mischances than this one Have learn'd me how to brook this patiently. SECOND OUTLAW. Come, bring her away. FIRST OUTLAW. Where is the gentleman that was with her? SECOND OUTLAW. Being nimble-footed, he hath outrun us; But Moyses and Valerius follow him. Go thou with her to the west end of the wood; There is our captain; we'll follow him that's fled. The thicket is beset; he cannot 'scape. [Exeunt all except the First Outlaw and SYLVIA.] FIRST OUTLAW. Come, I must bring you to our captain's cave. Fear not; he bears an honourable mind, And will not use a woman lawlessly. SILVIA. O Valentine, this I endure for thee! [Exeunt.] SCENE 4. Another part of the forest. [Enter VALENTINE.] VALENTINE. How use doth breed a habit in a man! This shadowy desert, unfrequented woods, I better brook than flourishing peopled towns. Here can I sit alone, unseen of any, And to the nightingale's complaining notes Tune my distresses and record my woes. O thou that dost inhabit in my breast, Leave not the mansion so long tenantless, Lest, growing ruinous, the building fall And leave no memory of what it was! Repair me with thy presence, Silvia! Thou gentle nymph, cherish thy forlorn swain. [Noise within.] What halloing and what stir is this to-day? These are my mates, that make their wills their law, Have some unhappy passenger in chase. They love me well; yet I have much to do To keep them from uncivil outrages. Withdraw thee, Valentine: who's this comes here? [Steps aside.] [Enter PROTEUS, SILVIA, and JULIA.] PROTEUS. Madam, this service I have done for you - Though you respect not aught your servant doth - To hazard life, and rescue you from him That would have forc'd your honour and your love. Vouchsafe me, for my meed, but one fair look; A smaller boon than this I cannot beg, And less than this, I am sure, you cannot give. VALENTINE. [Aside] How like a dream is this I see and hear! Love, lend me patience to forbear awhile. SILVIA. O miserable, unhappy that I am! PROTEUS. Unhappy were you, madam, ere I came; But by my coming I have made you happy. SILVIA. By thy approach thou mak'st me most unhappy. JULIA. [Aside] And me, when he approacheth to your presence. SILVIA. Had I been seized by a hungry lion, I would have been a breakfast to the beast, Rather than have false Proteus rescue me. O! heaven be judge how I love Valentine, Whose life's as tender to me as my soul, And full as much - for more there cannot be - I do detest false, perjur'd Proteus. Therefore be gone; solicit me no more. PROTEUS. What dangerous action, stood it next to death, Would I not undergo for one calm look! O, 'tis the curse in love, and still approv'd, When women cannot love where they're belov'd! SILVIA. When Proteus cannot love where he's belov'd! Read over Julia's heart, thy first best love, For whose dear sake thou didst then rend thy faith Into a thousand oaths; and all those oaths Descended into perjury, to love me. Thou hast no faith left now, unless thou'dst two, And that's far worse than none: better have none Than plural faith, which is too much by one. Thou counterfeit to thy true friend! PROTEUS. In love, Who respects friend? SILVIA. All men but Proteus. PROTEUS. Nay, if the gentle spirit of moving words Can no way change you to a milder form, I'll woo you like a soldier, at arms' end, And love you 'gainst the nature of love, - force ye. SILVIA. O heaven! PROTEUS. I'll force thee yield to my desire. VALENTINE. [Coming forward.] Ruffian! let go that rude uncivil touch; Thou friend of an ill fashion! PROTEUS. Valentine! VALENTINE. Thou common friend, that's without faith or love - For such is a friend now - treacherous man, Thou hast beguil'd my hopes; nought but mine eye Could have persuaded me. Now I dare not say I have one friend alive: thou wouldst disprove me. Who should be trusted, when one's own right hand Is perjur'd to the bosom? Proteus, I am sorry I must never trust thee more, But count the world a stranger for thy sake. The private wound is deep'st. O time most curst! 'Mongst all foes that a friend should be the worst! PROTEUS. My shame and guilt confounds me. Forgive me, Valentine; if hearty sorrow Be a sufficient ransom for offence, I tender 't here; I do as truly suffer As e'er I did commit. VALENTINE. Then I am paid; And once again I do receive thee honest. Who by repentance is not satisfied Is nor of heaven nor earth, for these are pleas'd. By penitence the Eternal's wrath's appeas'd: And, that my love may appear plain and free, All that was mine in Silvia I give thee. JULIA. O me unhappy! [Swoons] PROTEUS. Look to the boy. VALENTINE. Why, boy! why, wag! how now! What's the matter? Look up; speak. JULIA. O good sir, my master charg'd me to deliver a ring to Madam Silvia, which, out of my neglect, was never done. PROTEUS. Where is that ring, boy? JULIA. Here 'tis; this is it. [Gives a ring.] PROTEUS. How! let me see. Why, this is the ring I gave to Julia. JULIA. O, cry you mercy, sir, I have mistook; This is the ring you sent to Silvia. [Shows another ring.] PROTEUS. But how cam'st thou by this ring? At my depart I gave this unto Julia. JULIA. And Julia herself did give it me; And Julia herself have brought it hither. PROTEUS. How! Julia! JULIA. Behold her that gave aim to all thy oaths, And entertain'd them deeply in her heart: How oft hast thou with perjury cleft the root! O Proteus! let this habit make thee blush. Be thou asham'd that I have took upon me Such an immodest raiment; if shame live In a disguise of love. It is the lesser blot, modesty finds, Women to change their shapes than men their minds. PROTEUS. Than men their minds! 'tis true. O heaven! were man But constant, he were perfect: that one error Fills him with faults; makes him run through all the sins: Inconstancy falls off ere it begins. What is in Silvia's face, but I may spy More fresh in Julia's with a constant eye? VALENTINE. Come, come, a hand from either. Let me be blest to make this happy close; 'Twere pity two such friends should be long foes. PROTEUS. Bear witness, heaven, I have my wish for ever. JULIA. And I mine. [Enter OUTLAWS, with DUKE and THURIO.] OUTLAW. A prize, a prize, a prize! VALENTINE. Forbear, forbear, I say; it is my lord the duke. Your Grace is welcome to a man disgrac'd, Banished Valentine. DUKE. Sir Valentine! THURIO. Yonder is Silvia; and Silvia's mine. VALENTINE. Thurio, give back, or else embrace thy death; Come not within the measure of my wrath; Do not name Silvia thine; if once again, Verona shall not hold thee. Here she stands Take but possession of her with a touch; I dare thee but to breathe upon my love. THURIO. Sir Valentine, I care not for her, I; I hold him but a fool that will endanger His body for a girl that loves him not: I claim her not, and therefore she is thine. DUKE. The more degenerate and base art thou To make such means for her as thou hast done, And leave her on such slight conditions. Now, by the honour of my ancestry, I do applaud thy spirit, Valentine, And think thee worthy of an empress' love. Know then, I here forget all former griefs, Cancel all grudge, repeal thee home again, Plead a new state in thy unrivall'd merit, To which I thus subscribe: Sir Valentine, Thou art a gentleman, and well deriv'd; Take thou thy Silvia, for thou hast deserv'd her. VALENTINE. I thank your Grace; the gift hath made me happy. I now beseech you, for your daughter's sake, To grant one boon that I shall ask of you. DUKE. I grant it for thine own, whate'er it be. VALENTINE. These banish'd men, that I have kept withal, Are men endu'd with worthy qualities: Forgive them what they have committed here, And let them be recall'd from their exile: They are reformed, civil, full of good, And fit for great employment, worthy lord. DUKE. Thou hast prevail'd; I pardon them, and thee; Dispose of them as thou know'st their deserts. Come, let us go; we will include all jars With triumphs, mirth, and rare solemnity. VALENTINE. And, as we walk along, I dare be bold With our discourse to make your Grace to smile. What think you of this page, my lord? DUKE. I think the boy hath grace in him; he blushes. VALENTINE. I warrant you, my lord, more grace than boy. DUKE. What mean you by that saying? VALENTINE. Please you, I'll tell you as we pass along, That you will wonder what hath fortuned. Come, Proteus; 'tis your penance but to hear The story of your loves discovered: That done, our day of marriage shall be yours; One feast, one house, one mutual happiness. [Exeunt.] Publication Date: May 29th 2008 https://www.bookrix.com/-bx.shakespeare
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-luke-matthew-fallion-039-s-search-play/
Luke Matthew Fallion's Search (Play) Fallion's Search Characters Fallion (23)- main character of the play. He tries to find hints about Mauve’s disappearance. Anderson (20)- expert about people’s mysterious disappearances. Oliver (16)- the youngest in the group. He gets involved on the look of Mauve by accident. Daniele (23)- waitress in the café who gets involved on the look for Mauve. A’van (20)- hotel worker who wanted to help Fallion. Marv Hill (70)- old man who is also called “The Wizard” because of his great knowledge. Mauve (16)- the one who everyone was looking for. Paul (26)- was the cause of Mauve’s disappearance. I’van (20)- Paul’s best friend who tries killing Fallion. Robert II (20)- rich man who gets killed during the look-out for Mauve. Back-up Characters Calvin (21)- English gangster who tries to slow down Fallion for the search. Eli (18)- Calvin’s back-up buddy in case there’s trouble. Cole (22)- Calvin’s back-up buddy near the end of the play. Candia (22)- farmer woman who gets shot during the last scene. Setting: London, England. 7:54 a.m. December 13th, 1874. Current Setting: Fiskon’s Public Library. (Oliver walks into the room with Mauve.) Mauve (blank look): Just go to that man’s counter and pick the book out, I’ll wait right here. Oliver (approaches Anderson with a blank look): Sir, pardon me. I heard about the book “Thy shall die in the rain”, and I really love it! Is there any chance of this book available for rent? Anderson (smiles slightly): Son, I have never heard of the book. Please wait, I’ll go and peruse the papers to see if we have the book. Oliver (smiles): Thank you sir! (Turns to Mauve and nods in agreement) Mauve (whispers and looks at Oliver): Remember, beg for the book if necessary. Oliver (confused): I am not very good at begging Mauve. You should have asked for the book anyway. Anderson (approaches Oliver and smiles): Sorry young sir, we don’t have such a book in this library. You’ll have to check the other ones around. Oliver (Gets down on his knees): Please sir! I really need that book, my friend Mauve over there made a fair deal with Gretchen. And in order for that deal to remain as it is, he’ll need that book for Gretchen in order for Gretchen to give him the money! Anderson (looks down at Oliver confused): Pardon me? I don’t recall Gretchen giving money to anyone. Oliver (looks down): Yes… It was a secret, it was a small deal! Mauve (approaches Oliver and Anderson): May I interrupt? The deal was that I get what Gretchen wanted, and she will give me a fair deal of money for the new home I would buy in the south. Anderson (confused): How old are you? Mauve (looks at Anderson): 16 sir. Anderson (looks at Oliver): Well, I cannot get the book for you, I apologize. But Gretchen is less likely to give away money, even to beggars. Oliver (looks at Mauve): How much was she giving you? Mauve (smiles at Anderson): 20 pounds. Oliver (awkward): 20 pounds will not get you a mansion! Mauve (looks at Oliver): I wanted a small home in the south, my friends live there. Oliver (smiles slightly): The houses there are mostly made out of dirt and are filthy and are filled with bugs and other weird animals! Anderson (looks at Mauve): Look, you cannot take money from Gretchen or anybody. That’s against the law around here. (Paul enters the room with a small handgun) Paul (aims the gun at Mauve): Not when I’m around! Young man, you come with me, we will discuss this money problem. Mauve (looks at Paul, confused): I can’t… Paul (cocks the gun): It’s either yourself or the very money! Oliver (looks at Paul): Is that a real gun sir? Anderson (looks at Paul): What in the name of London is going on here?! Paul (aims the gun at Anderson): I just want the boy… Give me the boy! Mauve (confused): Why me? I didn’t do anything sir. Paul (upset): Yes, Gretchen’s money! That money will be mine! Anderson (looks at Paul): It’s only 20 pounds, now put the gun down! Paul (shoots the gun at Anderson, and hits his left leg) Anderson (falls down in pain): Ah, ah, ah the pain is burning my leg! Mauve (worried): Oh dear, oh dear! Please don’t hurt me! Paul (looks at Mauve): All I want is you for now, so the money can go to me! Mauve (looks down): I am not going anywhere! Oliver, run to the authorities and get help! Paul (aims the gun at Oliver): You don’t want to get shot kid, do you? I think not! Sit back and watch me take your friend! Oliver (looks at Mauve): Mauve! I think he wants to rape you! Paul (looks at Oliver, angry): What? No! I just want the money! (Paul grabs Mauve’s forearm and drags him through the door) Mauve (cries): Stop, what do you want?! Oliver (gets up and tries to run after Paul): Mauve, wait! (Oliver runs outside to get some help and bumps into Fallion) Oliver (looks at Fallon): Oh great sir which stands before me, my friend has been stolen, kidnapped. I need help! Fallion (turns around and looks at Oliver, whilst taking the cigar out of his mouth): Can I help you sir? Oliver (worried): Not me, my friend! He was taken by some stranger with a gun! Fallion (smiles at Oliver): Sure buddy, I could help you… If you’re willing to pay. Oliver (confused, backs away a little bit): I don’t understand… We don’t have much time sir! (Oliver tries to run but Fallion grabs his arm) Fallion (looks at Oliver): We can’t rush this, once they’re gone, they’re gone. Oliver (looks at Fallion): You don’t understand! I just want to find my friend! Fallion (nods in disagreement with closed eyes): We cannot rush this young sir, things like this are not supposed to be rushed! Oliver (confused, looks down): You cannot understand that a human being is out there, kidnapped?! Ugh, it is probably too late anyway! Fallion (looks down at Oliver): Look, I will help you find your friend, let’s get a small drink first and plan this. (Fallion and Oliver go and enter the café on the block.) Fallion (Walks into the café with Oliver and sits in the empty table): Well, what do you think we should do? Oliver (looks at Fallion confused): I don’t know sir, that’s why I came to you! Look I’m sorry if I am raising my voice but this is serious sir! Daniele (approaches Fallion and Oliver): Can I help you gentlemen? Fallion (turns his head to Daniele and nods in agreement, smiles): Yes, please. Get this young sir and me a mug of hot coffee. Daniele (writes down on the table, and then looks at Fallion and smiles): Anything else sir? Fallion (smiles): No thank you miss, please bring the coffee once it is done. Daniele (smiles and looks at Fallion): Yes sir. Oliver (looks at Fallion): Sir, we cannot sit around. My friend could be anywhere! Do I really have to pay you for this search? Fallion (looks down at the table and looks at Oliver): Alright, well, first off, do not call me sir, my name is Fallion, and yes, a payment will be required for this “search of yours”. Oliver (looks down at the table worried): Fallion, we cannot sit around. We must take action! Fallion (rubs under his nose and looks at Oliver): Well, you’ll have to pay me first. I need the money a lot, and I’ll need at least 12 pounds. Oliver (smiles slightly): 12 pounds eh? Well, I promise you that you’ll get your 12 pounds after we find Mauve. Fallion (slaps the table and looks at Oliver): Deal, what’s your name again? Oliver (looks at Fallion and nods in agreement): Oliver. O-L-I-V-E-R, Oliver. Daniele (approaches Fallion and Oliver and smiles): Here’s your order gentlemen. (Sets coffee on the table) Fallion (looks at Daniele): Pardon me miss. But have you seen a man, with a kid? The kid was… Oliver (looks at Daniele): 16. And the man’s name was Paul. He had dark hair with dark eyes and a black jacket. Daniele (smiles and looks at Fallion): Indeed, I have. The man ordered a small cake with coffee beans I believe. What was the kid’s name? Oliver (leans towards Daniele): Yes! His name was Mauve. Could you tell us where they went? Daniele (confused): I am not sure sir; I believe the man said he was heading down to Stonehenge. Fallion (slaps the table): Ugh that’s miles away from here! Daniele (looks at Fallion): But you can stay at the Makson hotel around here. Fallion (looks at Daniele): Alright, well do. We’ll stay at the hotel. Oliver (looks at Fallion): Fallion! We don’t have money! Fallion (looks at Oliver): I have some pounds. Relax… Oliver (sits back relieved then looks at Daniele): Hey… How can we get to the hotel you mentioned? Daniele (looks at Oliver): The hotel is to the right, up the small hill, between 2 buildings, across the street. Oliver (looks down at the table): Thank you. Fallion (looks at Daniele): Well, we’ll need your help. Will you come with us? Daniele (looks at Fallion): Sorry sir, I cannot. Work still isn’t over, sorry. Fallion (looks at the table): It is fine, no worries. Let’s go Oliver, we’ll find your friend. First, we must crash at the hotel. Thank you miss, we’ll be on our way. (Shakes Daniele’s hand) Oliver (looks and smiles at Daniele): Yes, thank you miss! (Oliver turns around and walks out the front door with Fallion) Daniele (looks down at the coffee then at the door): Wait gentlemen, you forgot your! Never mind… (Daniele walks back to the kitchen) (Fallion and Oliver arrive at the Makson hotel) Fallion (approaches the counter and looks at A’van): Hello sir, we’re on a little mission and I would really need a hotel room with my little friend over here. A’van (looks at Oliver for 2 seconds, and then looks at Fallion and smiles): Yes sir, I will tell Anderson to check if we have rooms available. Now let me hear about your little mission sir. Fallion (looks at A’van and smiles slightly): We are on a little run here so we would appreciate it if you would just hurry up with the room please. A’van (looks at Fallion with a blank look, and raises his hands up slowly): I... I’m sorry sir… Fallion (nods in agreement looking at A’van): Well, sir listen… My little friend and I are looking for this kid… Oliver (looks at A’van): Yes indeed! His name was Mauve. He’s only 16; he has dark, slightly long hair. A’van (looks at Oliver and smiles): Sorry sir, I haven’t seen him. I’van (approaches Fallion and looks at him with a sharp look): Looking for a boy? My friend Paul made a new friend named Mauve. Oliver (looks at I’van worried): You better not be kidding sir! I’van (looks at Oliver): Ay, but I’m not! Paul was vicious with a gun to his head. Fallion (looks at him for 2 seconds with an angry look and punches I’van, making him fall down to the floor): Are you serious sir? I’van (gets up and looks at Fallion with an angry look): Yes mate, I am serious! (I’van draws his sword and holds the end of the blade to Fallion’s neck) Oliver (looks at I’van): Is he dead? Fallion (looks at I’van sword and pushes him back): Back away there! A’van (runs into the middle of Fallion and I’van): Gentlemen, we can’t be serious here! Let’s be friends here, no one wants any trouble. I’van (looks at A’van): Do you work here? A’van (looks at I’van with an awkward look): Yes, yes sir, indeed. I work here. I’van (laughs): I will need a room. Anderson (approaches A’van and looks at him): A’van, we have a room available. Oliver (looks at Anderson with an awkward look and points at him): Hey. Pardon me sir, but last time I remember seeing you were this morning. You were shot in the leg by Paul. Anderson (looks at Oliver): Yes and that man got away with shooting me. I am going after him. I’van (stabs Anderson in the back with his sword): Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! No one is after my friend Paul! Anderson (coughs and falls down to his knees): A bad day, now I die. (Anderson falls down to the floor and dies) A’van (looks at Anderson, scared): Oh lord! Why must have this happened? Someone get help, immediately! I’van (looks at A’van laughing): If someone wants to kill a friend of mine, I kill them! Fallion (looks at I’van and draws his sword towards his chest): Listen here sir, you’re very crazy. We’ll make sure you stay here until the enforcements come and arrest you! I’van (looks at Fallion and laughs, and then drops his sword): I suggest you listen to me now! (I’van takes his gun out and aims it a Fallion) Fallion (slightly raises his arms up): Whoa oh, I don’t want trouble. Oliver (looks at Fallion): We have someone to find now! A’van (looks at I’van): Why would you do this? I’van (looks at Fallion): Oh because I do my job the right way. And my friend Paul pays me a fair price to kill someone that’s in my way! Fallion (smiles slightly): Come on sir, shoot me. I’van (looks at Fallion with an angry look): My name is I’van, Fallion! Fallion (puts his arms down and looks at I’van, confused): How do you know my name? I’van (pulls the trigger of the handgun and shoots Fallion into the chest): Fool! (Laughs) Fallion (falls down to the ground and looks at the floor, coughing out blood from his mouth): Fair… Oliver (looks at Fallion, worried deeply): No! Fallion! I need you, someone send help! A’van (looks at Oliver and runs to another room): I am calling for help! I’van (looks at Oliver): Must I shoot you too?! Oliver (worried): No! Please sir, be merciful, if you are! I’van (puts his gun away): Ay, I am. I’ll wait for the enforcements to come and arrest me! Oliver (backs away): Uh-huh… I think they’re on their way sir. A’van (looks at I’van and draws his own sword to I’van’s chest): I think you have done enough! We’ll wait here until you get arrested and taken away! I really don’t want to fight you, nor start anything. I am not usually like this. I’van (looks at A’van and takes a gun out and aims it at A’van’s head): Well mate, there’s many things to learn before you start drawing swords to people. One, you need to be a good fighter. Two, a handsome sir like you would not risk his own life in a fight! And three… (I’van falls down to his knee and looks at the floor, then falls) A’van (looks over I’van): Who are you? Daniele (looks at A’van): I heard a commotion. I am Daniele. A’van (looks down): My name is A’van. I didn’t know a woman such as yourself could end a man’s life so quickly with only a small knife. Daniele (smiles): I threw it. Oliver (looks at Daniele): Pardon me, Daniele! There are dead people, especially Fallion! Daniele (looks up): We can’t stay here, the enforcements are coming. We will be blamed for these deaths! Let’s move it gentlemen! (Daniele, Oliver, and A’van run out the door) (Daniele, Oliver, and A’van run to Marv Hill’s underground shelter during the night) Daniele (walks up to Marv Hill’s door and knocks): Trust me gentlemen, this man is amazing with his knowledge. Oliver (looks at Daniele): He’ll help us find Mauve, right? Daniele (looks at Oliver): Probably. Marv Hill (behind the door, high pitched voice): Who is it? Daniele (faces the door): It is Daniele with 2 friends. Is the wizard there? Marv Hill (opens the door and looks at Daniele): What do you need? Please come in. Oliver (walks inside): We’re looking for our missing friend sir. Marv Hill (looks at Oliver): All I can say now is find the witnesses of the disappearance of your friend. And if someone has kidnapped your friend, find the witnesses of the man. A’van (looks at Marv Hill): Sir, we really need some help. We just watched 3 people die. We just want to help this young sir find his friend and go on with our lives. Marv Hill (looks at A’van): What is your name lad? A’van (awkward look): A’van sir, why? Mark Hill (looks at A’van): A’van, nice weird name. That was my father’s name. A’van (looks at Marv Hill, weird): Oh… Th… Thank you? Oliver (looks at Marv Hill): Sir, we need your intelligence to find my friend! He’s only 16! Marv Hill (looks at Oliver): I really do want to help but first, I must ask you why you want to find this young boy. Oliver (looks down): He’s my friend, my best friend as a matter of fact sir. Daniele (looks at Marv Hill): I want to help because Oliver and his dead friend Fallion came to me for help at work, and the missing boy is only 16. A’van (looks down at his hands on the table): I… I saw 3 people die, I need to complete the cause of this disaster, and I want to honor those who died. Daniele (looks at A’van): I’van does not deserve to be honored, he’s Paul’s back-up friend. He’s a criminal. Marv Hill (looks at Daniele): I need some sleep Daniele. (Looks at Oliver) Young sir over here, come over to me tomorrow first thing in the morning and we will talk about this. Oliver (nods in agreement): Yes sir. (Daniele, Oliver, and A’van leave Marv Hill’s shelter) (Next day: Oliver wakes up at exactly 8:00 a.m. in the morning then runs to Marv Hill’s shelter immediately) Oliver (runs over to Marv Hill’s door and knocks rapidly 6 times): Wizard, wizard! I’m here, open the door. Let us talk, please! Marv Hill (opens the door and looks at Oliver): I am occupied with a little bit of company; I have 2 watchmen in my shelter. Come inside anyway. Oliver (walks inside to Marv Hill’s shelter and looks at the watchmen): What is this about? Cut To: (Daniele and A’van) Daniele (looks down): No we can’t go! A’van (grabs Daniele’s arm and looks at her): Well we can’t let the watchmen find you! I’ll go over to Marv Hill’s and I’ll discuss. Daniele (looks at A’van): I know, but the watchmen will question you! They know I killed I’van, I can’t live like this! A’van (looks down): But you can still get away with it, I’van was a criminal, his death might be a good deed to you and the town! (A’van grabs Daniele’s arm and leads her to his basement in his house) Look, you’ll have to hide here, until I settle this straight! I’ll go to Marv Hill and tell him you ran away to the upper towns in England! This has to work! Cut to: (Oliver and Marv Hill) Marv Hill (looks at Oliver, mysterious): You must find Daniele, she killed I’van. I’van held the clue to the missing boy, but now the search for him will be harder. A’van (approaches Marv Hill’s door and knocks 4 times): Wizard? Sir! I have news! Marv Hill (opens the door and looks at A’van): Oh good you are here. Come inside and sit, we must talk. A’van (comes inside and sits down in front of Marv Hill and the watchmen): Gentlemen, who talks before me? Robert II (walks inside and stands in front of A’van and looks at A’van): I am talking here before you to inform you that we are looking for Daniele! A’van (looks up at Robert II): Uh… No, I haven’t seen her sir. (Smiles and nods in agreement) Robert II (awkward): I haven’t asked if you’ve seen her sir. A’van (confused): She ran off to the upper towns of England. She told me this before she ran off. Robert II (goes down on his knees in front of A’van and looks at him): Where is she?! A’van (leans back, awkward): I don’t know sir, please back off. I don’t know you. Robert II (takes his glasses off): I am rich; I work for the watchmen of London! I am prepared to offer you a fair price and reward if you know where she is! A’van (looks down): I… I… I can’t… I don’t know what to say, I do not know where she stays hidden. Robert II (slaps A’van): Listen young sir, I’m not into any games! She has committed a murder, where is she?! A’van (leans back once more): Please sir, I do not know. Robert II (stands up and slaps A’van harder): Where is she?! A’van (falls down on his knees, covers his face with his hands and cries): She’s in my basement… My basement! Robert II (looks down at A’van): Thank you sir. We must arrest her, or hang her! Marv Hill (looks at Robert II): Well sir, thank you for coming. (Looks at Oliver) I will assure you that we will find your friend. Oliver (looks down): I did not want anyone to get hurt nor killed. I just wanted my friend found and something done with Paul. Marv Hill (walks Robert II and the watchmen out the door): Thank you for coming. A’van (gets up and looks at Marv Hill): Sir, this is your knowledge? Your greatest visitor is blamed for this situation, now she will be arrested, or possibly killed! Marv Hill (looks at A’van): A’van, please call me Wizard. And I am sure that Daniele will not be caught at once, but will plan an escape route. Fallion (walks into Marv Hill’s shelter): I’m back to help. Oliver (runs at Fallion and hugs him): Fallion! You have returned from the dead! Marv Hill (looks at Fallion): Oh lord! You’re the one and only great Fallion! I have heard of your father, “The Pharaoh”! Fallion (looks at Marv Hill): Yes wizard, I have heard of you as well. A’van (looks and points at Fallion): I can assure that you were shot close range, into the chest. How did you make it? Fallion (looks at A’van): I saved myself by breaking the bullet down, and pulling the remains out. It didn’t penetrate my bones, or organs. Oliver (looks at Fallion): Look, we must find Mauve! Fallion (looks at Oliver): Ah, you’re little friend. Sure, I will still help you buddy. Oliver (looks at his fingers): Daniele said Paul was heading to Stonehenge! We must go there now! Fallion (smiles slightly): Speaking of Daniele, where is the pretty lady? Oliver (looks at Fallion): Who Daniele? She is… She is probably dead now. Fallion (grins): What are you talking about Oliver? Oliver (looks down): Robert II probably found her with his watchmen. He most likely shot her or stabbed or hung her. Remember? She has killed I’van, but the watchmen needed to interrogate I’van about Paul, so since I’van has been killed, it made her the criminal. She threw the knife to the back of his neck. I cannot forget that image… Fallion (looks down): Oh… Poor lady… A’van (looks down): I know. It was my fault. Marv Hill (looks at Fallion): Fallion, you must leave now with your 2 friends. Good luck with your search! (Fallion, Oliver, and A’van leave Marv Hill’s shelter) Fallion (walks with Oliver and A’van and looks down): Look we’ll be able to get to Stonehenge with a horse. I’ll rent a horse with a carriage and we will get there quicker. Calvin (approaches Fallion and the 2 others): Hey there sir! I need some pounds for a gun, lend me some please. Fallion (looks at Calvin): Oh. Sir? You have any idea who I am? Calvin (looks at Fallion): I am Calvin, I need money! Fallion (looks down): Alright, if you haven’t heard of me, I am Fallion. Calvin (draws his sword and points it at Fallion): I am not interested Fallion, I will have to get money out of all of you the hard way! Fallion (draws his sword): Calvin, you do not want to mess with me right now. You will only slow us down sir. Calvin (charges at Fallion): Well then! [Insert fight] (Fallion and Calvin fight with swords) Oliver (looks at A’van): They will only slow us down! A’van (looks down at Oliver): I agree. (A’van walks away but gets stopped by Eli) Eli (looks at A’van): Hello there. I need to help my friend out! (Eli draws his sword) A’van (draws his sword): I guess this could be a solution for us all sir. (Eli charges at A’van) [Insert fight] (A’van and Eli fight with swords) Fallion (gets his sword into Calvin’s chest): Aha! Calvin (drops to the ground): If you’d be kind enough, pray upon my body sir. (Calvin dies) Fallion (pulls his sword out of Calvin’s chest): I will not pray for an enemy, but will honor the spirit. (Fallion turns and sees A’van fighting with Eli. Fallion runs to help A’van) Eli (stabs through A’van’s stomach and pulls the sword out): I’m sorry, I shall not forget this moment, but I did what was needed. I helped my friend! A’van (falls to the ground on his back and looks at Eli): I guess you’re the best man and fighter. Take my pounds for a great reward for yourself. (A’van drops his head back and dies) Fallion (looks at Eli): Fool! I needed him for the search! (Fallion slices Eli’s hand off with his sword) Eli (looks at his missing hand): Ah! Put me out of my misery! Fallion (looks at Oliver): Let’s go. Eli (falls to the ground): Fool! You must finish me at once, this is not very comfortable! Fallion (looks at Oliver): Do the honors. (Fallion hands his sword to Oliver) Do it. Oliver (Walks up to Eli): Please forgive me sir. (Oliver stabs Eli into the throat) Forgive me, may you rest in peace sir! (Eli dies) Fallion (looks at Oliver): Did it feel good? Oliver (scared): No! I just killed someone! Fallion (smiles slightly): He was an enemy. Good work buddy. (Fallion walks away) Oliver (looks at Fallion): We can’t just leave them here! Fallion (turns around and looks at Oliver): Are you coming to find your friend or not? Oliver (looks down): Yes but I am not used to a crime like this… I am a criminal! Fallion (looks at Oliver): Come on buddy. It is a normal thing in life which occurs every day. Oliver (looks at Fallion): Well then, let’s find Mauve and Paul! Fallion (walks with Oliver): Alright, over there we can rent a horse and a carriage. Wait here. (Fallion walks to the horse rental place) Oliver (stands): Hurry back! (4 minutes later…) Fallion (walks over to Oliver): I did not have enough for a horse, just a small carriage. Oliver (looks at the small carriage): Why did you rent it? Fallion (looks at Oliver): We will take turns to avoid tiredness. Sound like a plan? Oliver (nods in agreement): I agree Fallion… (4 hours later…) Fallion (pulling the mini carriage with Oliver on it): This is not very easy as I imagined Oliver. (Fallion stops pulling then turns around to look at Oliver) Oliver? Oliver (sitting on the carriage with his head looking down): I can’t imagine what god thinks of me now. I am a criminal, a murderer, a killer! Fallion (approaches Oliver): Oliver, the man you have killed was the criminal. He killed our good friend A’van. But you stroke back from the heart and defeated A’van’s murderer. You’re not a killer, you’re a hero. Oliver (looks at Fallion and sobs): I guess you’re right. (Oliver nods in agreement then smiles) Fallion (taps Oliver’s shoulder and smiles): That is the spirit Oliver! Oliver (looks over Fallion): Fallion! A small farm! There! (Oliver points towards the farm in the distance) (Fallion and Oliver approach the farm) Fallion (looks at Candia): Hello there miss! We need to borrow a horse. Oliver (looks at Candia): Yes we need a horse! Candia (looks down at her laundry): My name is Candia; I am not willing to lend you any horse of mine to you strangers! Fallion (smiles slightly): Candia, wow that is a pretty name! What are you doing there? Candia (looks at Fallion): Finishing my laundry. Robert II (comes over to Candia and looks at Oliver): Hello there young sir we meet again! Oliver (looks at Robert II): Indeed. Robert II (looks at Fallion): And who are you? Fallion (looks at Robert II): I am Fallion, known because of my father the… (Interrupted by Robert II) Robert II (chuckles): Uh huh uh huh uh huh! I think you should leave my new friend Candia, alone. Fallion (looks at Robert II): Sir, we needed to borrow a horse! Robert II (grins): I can have you arrested! Cole (approaches Robert II): Hello, I heard my friend Calvin was killed. They said it was you! (Cole pulls out a handgun from his coat and shoots Robert II in the stomach) Robert II (falls down with his hands over his stomach): Oh! I did not do such thing! I will have you arrested! (Robert II slowly reaches for his handgun in his holster) Cole (looks at Robert II): I don’t think so! (Cole shoots Robert II into the head) (Robert II dies) Fallion (backs away with Oliver’s arm in his hand): Whoa! Oh! We don’t want trouble! Candia (looks at Cole): What is wrong with you?! Cole (looks at Candia): Oh such beauty in you! But so shameful that you must die as you’re a witness to Robert’s murder! (Cole shoots Candia in the chest) (Candia falls back and dies) Fallion (looks at Cole): What, you’re a criminal yourself? Cole (looks at Fallion): You must know that you must die along with your little young friend! Fallion (looks at Cole and smiles slightly, whispers): Oliver… Run… Oliver (looks at Cole and backs away slowly, whispers): I am… Cole (looks at Oliver and aims the gun at him): No you don’t! Fallion (tackles Cole causing him to drop his gun): Oliver! Grab the gun! Oliver (runs to the gun and picks it up and aims at Cole): Alright1 I have you now! Cole (looks at Oliver): Yes! Young sir you have! Now shoot me, let us see you do it! End this moment, finish my life! Fallion (looks at Oliver): Oliver, shoot him! (Cole gets shot in the head in front of Fallion and Oliver) Fallion (looks at Oliver): But… You did not shoot him; you did pull the trigger… Oliver (looks at the gun in his hands, worried): I know… I… It came from behind us… Fallion (turns around and looks at Paul): And who are you sir? Oliver (turns around and looks at Paul): Fallion, that’s Paul. Shoot him, shoot him now! Fallion (looks at Oliver): So that’s Paul? We must ask him where Mauve is. Paul (looks at Fallion): I heard of you… The great Fallion, the son of the pharaoh… Is it Mauve you’re looking for? He still didn’t get the money. All I wanted was the 20 pounds. Fallion (looks at Paul): We went through all of this bloody trouble, just for 20 pounds? Paul (aims the gun at Fallion): Not just that! You will help me get discovered by letting me kill you, that way I will be recognized and known. Paul, the hunter of Fallion, the son of the great pharaoh! Oliver (looks at Paul): I am guessing you remember me? Paul (looks at Oliver): Indeed, you were Mauve’s little friend. But now I must shoot you and the great Fallion for all of your hard work! (Paul chuckles and aims the gun at Fallion) Fallion (looks at Paul): Wait! I will pay you my pounds for you to stop this! Paul (looks at Fallion): I can just kill you and take the money! Oliver (gets up and charges at Paul): Ah! Paul (turns to Oliver): Huh? Fallion (charges at Paul and tackles him): How can this happen Paul? (Fallion takes Paul’s gun and aims it at Paul’s head) First you were in control with a gun, but now I am the man?! Paul (looks at Fallion): Congratulations! If you kill me, you will never find Mauve! (Fallion shoots Paul’s knee) Paul (throws his head back): Ah! I will not be able to walk! The pain is deep! I have not caused pain! Idiot! Fool! Mauve is tied to the tree in the back! Fallion (looks at Oliver): Go find him. (Fallion aims the gun at Paul’s head) any last words? Paul (cries in pain): Why must you kill me now? Fallion (nods in disagreement): You caused many deaths through my journey, and you will see how death tastes like, in hell! (Fallion shoots Paul in the head) (Paul dies) Oliver (approaches Mauve tied up to a tree and unties him): Mauve I found you! Everything is good now! Fallion (approaches Oliver and Mauve): Hello Mauve, I am Fallion. Mauve (hugs Oliver): Thank you, thank you, thank you! Oliver (smiles at Mauve): I couldn’t do it without the help from my great friend Fallion! Mauve (smiles at Fallion): Thank you sir, Fallion! Fallion (nods in agreement): Glad I have helped young Mauve. (Lights fade, the play ends) Credits… Written by Luke Matthew Played by… Fallion – Anthony Siscos Anderson – Michael Christian Oliver – Gary Colski Daniele – Paula Saunters A’van – Luke Matthew Marv Hill – Peter Newman Mauve – Alex Scorpo Paul – Alexander Vidal I’van – Josh Graham Fals Robert II – Robbie Foster Calvin – Victor Wallomounan Eli – Kevin Ricoloso Cole – Steven Walsh Candia – Nikki Sauloman Play powered by Christopher Bayslie Play directed by Josh Graham Fals I own all copyrights to this play, please don’t steal it and pretend it’s yours. I don’t want any copyright infringement situations on Bookrix.com. Thanks, and you’ll need my permission if you want to print the play out. There will be more, thank you. Publication Date: June 7th 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-thebeatlesfan
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-missy-what-is-right/
Missy What is Right As I stood next to my mother and father I noticed the deathly silence. I slowly turned my head to the right, and then the left. We were surrounded by clusters of people. My sister, Nikki, and her daughter, Star, stood next to our right also. I looked to the left, and saw my little sister, Ashley hiding in my father’s arms. She is only eleven, and I am fifteen. I looked back over at Star, who looked frightened as she tried to hide in her mother’s arms. “ Momma,” Star said. I looked over at her as she looked desperately up at my sister. Nikki brought a finger to her lips, as a symbol to show to be quiet. Star bit on her bottom lip, and buried her face into Nikki’s shirt. Nikki looked over at me and our eyes connected, and I saw the horror that was within her eyes. I looked down at the ground taking a deep breath, and then looked back up and saw the mothers and father with their children. Holding them, hoping that their names would not be called. “ Joseph Barkley,” Another name was called off by one of the leaders. A high pitched cry came through the crowds, and I closed my eyes taking a step back into my mother, and she wrapped her arms around me kissing the top of my head. I watched Joseph pry himself away from his mother’s arms as she cried for him, tears running down her face, and he slowly approached the stage. The leaders, they are taking children to these camps, where they will be put to work. Separated from their families, and from what I have heard about these camps, that is they are bad. It would be a miracle if your child lived through the camp. The age group ranged from eight year olds to eighteen. Anything older or younger was not accepted. Their names where pulled out of a box, and each time a leader would reach into the box a parent would grip onto their child praying to god that their babies names wouldn’t be called. Today is the last day of selections, and twenty kids will be selected to leave. Girls do not go to these camps, because the leaders assume they wouldn’t be able to survive it, so the boy’s family believe it’s not hard on the families in which there are girls. But in reality it’s heart breaking. To watch a family being ripped apart, it’s something no one should ever have to witness, or be put through. “ One more,” My mother whispered in my ear. I looked up and noticed that only one more name had to be called today. All the boys that had stood on stage looked the age of fifteen or older. No young ones. “ Patrick Davis,” The leader called out. A mother cried out to my left, and I slowly turned and saw her fall to her knee’s wrapping her arms around her son. He was not even about ten I would say. He was such a tiny thing. His short brown hair stuck to him, and he looked over at me, and our eyes connected. His deep brown eyes started to water, and then he wrapped his tiny arms around his mother’s neck. “ Mommy, I don’t want to die!” he cried into her shoulder. I felt my body flinch, and I watched the scene that was happening in front of me, and my heart slowly started to break. I heard someone approaching, and I looked over and saw one of the guards making his way over to the mother, and her son. I closed my eyes, and opened them once again. The guard roughly grabbed the little boys arm, and tore him away from his mother. She knelt on the ground tears pouring down her face, and the little boy screamed for his mother over and over. The guard had no emotion in his face. He must have been through this… Breaking families apart so many times that he is just use to it, or he just forgot how to feel. I watched the boy being dragged up towards the stage, and he fought so hard, but he was so tiny it seemed like nothing. I knew that if they boy was to be sent to the camps he would die within the first week. I knew this… I took a step away from my mother feeling her arms unwrap from around me, and I took a step forward and continued, and I broke out into a jog towards the boy. “ Stella!” I heard my mother cry out to me. “ S-Stop!” I shouted. Everyone froze, and the guard stopped, turning around to look at me and the petrified little boy turned to me, and I looked down at him feeling my throat start to tighten. “ I- I volunteer myself,” I said loudly. The guard looked at me as though I was a crazy person. I looked up at the stage at the leader, and he was watching me intently. “ We do not pick girls,” The leader said. “ You did not pick a girl, I am volunteering. No one ever said anything that a girl could not volunteer,” I said loudly. He arched an eyebrow at me, and I stepped forward grabbing the boys arm, and the guard lost grip of him, and I brought him towards me, and stood in front of him, his tiny body hiding in back of me. “ I volunteer myself to take this boys spot,” I said loudly with my head held high, and I stared right into the eyes of the leader. It was quiet… All I could hear was the sound of my own breathing, and the little boy whimpering behind me. “ Fine,” the leader finally said. The cry of my mother’s voice filled the air, and my body flinched. “ No!” My mother cried out. I turned around and saw her looking at me, and tears ran down her face. I looked down at the little boy. “ Go to your mother,” I whispered to him. He looked up at me, and wrapped his arms around my legs. “ Thank you lady,” he said. “ Thank you for saving my life,” he said between whimpers. I took a deep breath, and then felt his arms unwrap from around me, and he sprinted off towards his mother. He flung into her arms, and she held him close to her, and she looked at me, and I saw the relief in her eyes. I felt a hand wrap around my arm, and I turned around and saw the guard. He started to walk me towards the stage, and then let go of my arm and I slowly made my way up the stairs. Each step I felt my heart break, but I kept my head up high showing that I was not weak. I stood on the stage, and took my place next to a boy who was over a foot taller than I, and twice my size. I looked out into the crowd, and everyone’s eyes were on me. I let out a shaky breath, and it was quiet. “ Well, we have finished the choosing. Every child sha’ll have twenty minutes to say goodbye to their family members, and then we are taking off,” The leader said. I slowly made my way off of the stage, and towards my family. As I got off of the stairs, I felt a pair of arms tightly wrap around me. I sucked in a deep breath, and knew I was in my father’s arms. I knew how he smells, the scent of his cologne smelled like mint with chocolate. “ Oh my little girl,” he cried. I tilted my head up, and saw tears rolling down his cheeks. “ Papa,” I whispered. he sucked in a deep breath, and sobs escaped from his mouth. “ My little girl,” he said again moving a strand of hair away from my face. “ Your only a child,” He whispered. He held me close to him, and I heard his heart beating hard and fast. The sound of his sobs filled the air, and I wrapped my arms around him feeling his body heat. “ Your only fifteen,” he muttered. “ I love you, papa,” I whispered. “ I love you too baby girl,” he cried. He reluctantly let go of me, and instantly another pair of arms wrapped around me. “ What have you done?” My mother cried as she held me in her embrace. I felt her shaking body against mine, and her tears poured off of her face, and I closed my eyes burring my face into her chest, and I felt my eyes start to water. “ Mama,” I whispered. She loosened her grip on me, and looked down at me. “ If that boy was to go to those camps he would of died in the first week. Mama, I have a larger chance of surviving than he did,” I said shaking my head. “ This wasn’t your responsibility though,” she said. “ I couldn’t stand back, and watch that little boy get killed Mama,” I said my voice starting to break. “ I couldn’t let that little boy die,” I said again tears starting to form in my eyes. She bit her lip, and cupped my face in her hands. “ I love you Stella,” she cried. “ I know mama, I love you too,” I mumbled. I felt arms wrap around my waist, and I turned my head and saw my baby sister looking up at me with tears in her eyes. “ Ashley,” I whispered. My mother let go of me, and I knelt down wrapping my arms around my baby sister, and she buried her face into my chest, and wrapped her arms around my upper body. “ S-Stella, don’t leave me,” she cried. “ Sh,” I whispered kissing her forehead. I tilted her head up, so she could look at me. “ it’s going to be okay Hun,” I said looking her in the eyes. “ You’re going to come back, right?” She asked. I bit my lip, and felt a tear fall down my cheeks and I nodded my head. “ Im coming back,” I whispered. I slowly stood up, and my sister stood there with Star standing next to her, and she just looked at me, and she started shaking her head, and her body started to shake. I looked down at Star and she was looking around. She’s too young to understand what is going on, but she knows there is something wrong. She looks like a lost puppy. “ Hey Nikki,” I whispered. She pressed her lips together, and took a step closer to me putting her hand on my cheek. “ My baby sister,” She whispered. “ Im not a baby,” I said my voice starting to crack. “ You’re always going to be the baby,” She laughed. “ Ashley’s the baby,” I mumbled. “ And your our second baby,” she whispered. she took another step closer to me, and wrapped her arms around me, and I wrapped my arms back around her. “ Nikki, can you do something for me?” I whispered in her ear. She separated from me a little, and looked down at me nodding her head. “ Don’t let Star forget about her Aunty Stella,” I said my voice cracking and tears rolling down my cheeks. She let out a gasp, and held me closely to her. “ N-Never,” she sobbed. “ I love you,” I whispered. “ I love you too,” She whispered back. I took a step away from her, and knelt on the ground holding my arms open. “ Star! Come give your aunty a hug!” I laughed. Star ran towards me, and roughly wrapped her little arms around my waist. I held her close to me, and kissed the top of her head taking a deep breath. “ Aunty loves you very much,” I whispered. “I- I love you too Danty,” She said. I pressed my lips together closing my eyes, and tears came running down my face, and I felt her tiny hand touch my cheek. “ Danty, w-why are you crying?” She asked in her tiny little voice. “ It’s nothing baby girl,” I whispered. I smiled at her, and she gave me a small smile back. I stood up, and felt a tap on my shoulder, and turned around and saw the mother and her son. She watched me closely. “ You’re a hero,” She finally said. I shook my head. “ Im not a hero,” I said clearing my voice. I looked down at the little boy, and said, “ I just did what was right,” I looked back at the mother, and her lips where shaking, “ Thank you,” She whispered. I gave her a smile, and nodded my head. I turned back towards my family, and they all watched me, and I felt my heart breaking every minute that passed. “ I- I know what I did… It… It was the right thing to do,” I said to them. My father took a step closer to me, and slowly removed the necklace that he was wearing. It was an arrow head, and out of all the years I have been alive I have never seen him take it off. He stepped closer, and put it over my head, and it slid down my neck resting on my chest. I looked down at it, and then up at my father. I opened my mouth, and he shook his head. “ I love you with all my heart, don’t you give up… no matter how hard things will become you can’t give up. You need to come back to your family. You need to come back to us,” he said. I saw the pain in his eyes, and I let out a shaky breath nodding my head. He pressed his lips against my forehead, and whispered, “ never give up, whenever things get hard hold this necklace close to your heart and remember us. Remember your family and fight for us,” He said shakily. I nodded my head. There was a loud sharp ringing noise, and the leader stood at the bottom of the ship. “ It’s time to leave!” He called out. I gave all my family members one last hug, and made my way towards the ship. Each step I took my feet started to feel heavier, and my throat felt like it was closing, and my breathing started to become heavy. I looked around and eyes locked on me giving me sorrowful looks, and I looked away from them. There were boys walking in front of me ready to leave for the camps, and some behind me. As we climbed aboard the ship I felt like my head was spinning. I sucked in a deep breath, and continued to walk, and then I felt a hard shove on my shoulder, and a cry escaped my lips, and I stumbled forward. I heard my father shout, and I stood up, and saw him running towards the ship, and then a gun fire went off, and my father dropped to the ground. My breathing stopped, and I stood their frozen. “ Papa!” I cried. One of the guard shoved me hard onto the ship, and once I was on I turned back around and saw my mother screaming and crying and she dropped down next to my father’s motionless body, and I saw Nikki, Star, and Ashley all kneeling down next to my father, and I could hear their cries from where I stood. I felt a hand wrap around the back of neck, and I was dragged forward, and a door was pulled open from the ground, and I was shoved forward, and fell down into the cellar. I landed on the ground with a hard thump a cry escaping my lips, and I looked around and saw dozens of faces watching me intently with sorrowful looks. The rest of the boys where shoved down into the cellar, and everyone went off into their own beds. I sat there and crawled into a corner leaning back against a wall, and the memory of what had happened replayed over and over in my mind. I closed my eyes feeling my body becoming weak. “ Our first night in hell,” I heard a boy say. I brought my hand up to my chest, and wrapped my hand around the necklace which my father had given to me, and held it against my heart. Goodbye mother, father, Nikki, star, Ashley, and goodbye life. I opened my mouth, and quietly sang to myself. “Papa, how I love you Papa, how I need you Papa, how I miss you Kissing me goodnight.” (Barbra Steisand: Papa, can you hear me?). Publication Date: July 20th 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-animefreak1201
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-dragongirl4-all-of-the-above/
dragongirl4 All Of The Above The Story of Aura Prolouge: Here We Go Dear Reader, Everybody's heard of the Greek gods, right? So, since you know about them you probably know that Artemis is a madian goddess, right? Like virgin? Like cannot have a kid goddess. Well, geuss what? Yup, that's right, I'm her kid. Her daughter really. Oh yeah, and Mom's still a virgin. Do you know how? Oh, I'm her's alright, but she never gave birth. I used to be a stray golden retiever german shepered mix. And when I was 1, (7 in human years), Artemis found me. Her brother, Apollo, has had plenty of children. But she had sworn never to LOVE a man. So she simply gave me her powers and made me her child, and named me Aura. I had the abillity to change into any animal, to control the moon, and to minipulate and control othae animals. I could levatate, become invisible, produce (make objects appear out of no where), I could teleport, and I had a sick sence of eyesight, hearing, and smell. What more could a girl ask for? How about a normal life? Some people have found me as a cat or a dog, and taken me in. I've always excaped. Once, when I was called Silver I lived with a family for 2 years, then I ran away. I was a cat at the time. Those Missing! Silver the Cat poasters fallowed me for months. I wouldn't have left if they weren't getting suspicious. They had found me when I was ten, or 90 in cat years, but I age llke a human. So, at 12 they expected me to be dead. You know, 108 years old. So they where onto me. So I left. Now, I'm 14, 98 in dog years and 127 in cat years. And I'm going to school for the first time. I won a writing for a one year schooler-ship to a school. I'm going into eighth grade. I think it's gonna be fun. New people, new ideas, new knollage. Oooohhhh, that's made me think of a song. 'Unwritten' by Natasha bedingfeild. Oh, just so you know, I love music and sometimes sing songs to make my point. Now to get on with my story! Onward to 8th grade! ~Your friend, Aura Capter 1 J.D. Middle School I stood infront of the HUGE middle school, and gulped. J.D. Middle School was a huge monster, ready to swallow me whole. My huge, unflattering LMFAO T-shirt flapped around my body. In my overly large jeans, my knees where knocking. My Nikes (I only wore Nike sneakers. This was out of respect for Nike, goddess of victory) had most cerianly seen better days. My golden blond hair whipped my face. Have you ever been so scared, so mortified, that you where froven to the spot, a scared bundle of teenage girl? Well,that was me. I felt like turning into a little snake and slither-darting away. 'BRIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNGGGGGG' The bell screamed my death sentance loudly and clearly. Time for it to start. I took a deep, filling breath and trudged up the stone steps. "Lacy? Lacy?!" One girl called. See? Even their names sounded rich. Unfair! And I was stucvk with the stupid name Aura. "Mary-Anna! What's wrong?" A girl called, that I assumed to be Lacy. "Oh, Lacy! You missed French! Avez-vous rattraper? " Mary-Anna asked. Lacy giggled. " Oui. Je suis bien. Merci. " " Grand! Revoir! " " Au revoir! " Lacy yelled waving to Mary-Anna. How was I spose to pass 8th grade when I had no idea what people where saying?! The only other language I knew was Italin. And very little! Ohhh, boooyyy. I walked into the school and found my locker. 31-09-11. I went to open my locker. It was stuck. I redid the combo. Nope. I banged the door. Stupid peice of crap!!! I truged into my new homeroom. "Ummm, excuse me. My locker's jammed." I told her. She said, "Oh, you're the new girl. That's OK, just sit down." Great way to start! >:( Publication Date: January 23rd 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-dragongirl4
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-ladawn-kelley-crazy-addiction/
LADAWN KELLEY CRAZY ADDICTION Our friendship began by getting together on the weekends. After a few months we were inseparable. My family would not except me in their lives if she stayed around but she made me feel so good at least that’s what I thought. Within a couple of years I lost everything including my self worth. I want her out of my life but she is to strong for me, she won’t stop calling me. I am tired of this addiction and tonight I will make it end. I fill the needle and find a vein …. I ‘m sorry mom and dad. Publication Date: July 22nd 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-ladawn28
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-adande-bienaime-high-school-drama/
adande bienaime high school Drama how do they survive this is for all who struggle.and to the life that not everyone can live. Text: adande bienaime Images: building Editing: adande bienaime Translation: vathsana marquez All rights reserved. Publication Date: February 16th 2013 https://www.bookrix.com/-adorckable
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-toni-n-when-i-first-saw-him/
Toni N. When I First Saw Him I Knew He Was The One... I dedicate this to Amber M. for making the cover and my grandma, Linda. AND.............YOU!!!! Chapter One "Zoey" My sister, Imogen yelled from her room. "Hurry up and get ready for school." Imogen told me. "I am." I told her. I stood up and ran to my closet. I grabbed my black skinny jeans, my pink shirt that says 'P!nk' on it, my white jacket, my pink and black high heels, and my loop earrings. I got dressed in my outfit for School and pushed my phone in my pocket.My sister knock on my door. "Just a second." I told Imogen. I put my pink bag on my shouder. "Come in, Imogen." I told her. She opened the door and smiled at me. "Are you done getting ready?" Imogen asked me. "Yep, I'm ready." I said. "Then come on then." Imogen told me. "Okay." I mumbled. She walked out of my room and I sighed. I shoved my things into my pink bag and zipped it up. "Are you trying to be late?!" Imogen yelled-asked me. "Why would I want to be late? I love School!" I yelled back. "Im glad you like school. I hate school." Imogen told me. "Why do you hate school, Imogen?" I asked, curious. "Dont worry about it, Zoey." She sighed in annoyance. I walked downstairs to the front door and opened it. "Okay. Let's go. Mom is waiting for us." I told Imogen. "Yeah. We should go. I rather talk to mom then listening to you being a pain about school." Imogen snapped at me. "I am not being a pain, Imogen. Oh Emm Geeh." I said. "Never mind, Zoey. Let's just go. Mom is waiting." She told me as she bumped my shoulder when she walked out the door to mom's car. My mouth formed a 'o', I turned around, and huffed. I stomped off into my mom's car. The reason why I have to ride with my mom is because I'm fifteen and I don't have a car. I got into the passenger side and Imogen had got into the back seat.I turned on the radio and Call Me Maybe by Carly Rae Jepson came on. It was my favorite song in the world. I threw a wish in the well, Don't ask me, I'll never tell I looked to you as it fell, And now you're in my way I'd trade my soul for a wish, Pennies and dimes for a kiss I wasn't looking for this, But now you're in my way Your stare was holdin', Ripped jeans, skin was showin' Hot night, wind was blowin' Where you think you're going, baby? Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But here's my number, So call me, maybe? It's hard to look right, At you baby, But here's my number, So call me, maybe? Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But here's my number, So call me, maybe? And all the other boys, Try to chase me, But here's my number, So call me, maybe? You took your time with the call, I took no time with the fall You gave me nothing at all, But still, you're in my way I beg, and borrow and steal Have foresight and it's real I didn't know I would feel it, But it's in my way Your stare was holdin', Ripped jeans, skin was showin' Hot night, wind was blowin' Where you think you're going, baby? Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But here's my number, So call me, maybe? It's hard to look right, At you baby, But here's my number, So call me, maybe? Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But here's my number, So call me, maybe? And all the other boys, Try to chase me, But here's my number, So call me, maybe? Before you came into my life I missed you so bad I missed you so bad I missed you so, so bad Before you came into my life I missed you so bad And you should know that I missed you so, so bad It's hard to look right, At you baby, But here's my number, So call me, maybe? Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But here's my number, So call me, maybe? And all the other boys, Try to chase me, But here's my number, So call me, maybe? Before you came into my life I missed you so bad I missed you so bad I missed you so, so bad Before you came into my life I missed you so bad And you should know that So call me, maybe? After the song was off we arrived at school. I screamed in joy and clapped my hands at the same time. Imogen groaned and I could tell she was rolling her eyes. She hated School and she wished School was never invented. "I just love school!" I screeched. "You and your school, Zoey." Imogen muttered. We got out of the car but Imogen did not want to. I did though. "So happy to be here!" I yelled and threw my arms in the air. I looked around and thank god there was no one outside. If anyone knew that I loved school that would hurt my reputation. Imogen just started to laugh at me. I knew why Imgoen was laughing at me to. I just didn't pay attention to her. We was a little earlier because the buses came two minutes after we did. As soon as the buses stopped we went into the school. I stated to walk down the hall way with my sister Imogen. I saw my crew around the corner and Imogen went the opposite way to her locker. I walked up to my crew and started talking about usual things. Fashion. Popularity. Boys. Chapter Two Text: © 2012-2013 Toni N. Images: Favim :) Editing: Amber M. All rights reserved. Publication Date: January 30th 2013 https://www.bookrix.com/-angelcake7235
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-paris-hemmington-alice/
Paris Hemmington Alice So there’s this girl named Alice who always got bullied at school. Her escape from all her bullies was for her to write. Everyday she would walk home from school very slowly with bruises on her wrist. When she would get home she would just lay on her bed and think of all the names she was called that day and all the threats she was given. She would cry herself sick. Until one day she decided to grab a notebook and just write how she felt. She writes: “ I’m walking this borderline. And apparently, I’m different and insignificant. But, no one even sees how I feel. No one sees the incredible me. Where must I go? It’s cold trying to travel this road alone..” After writing that she felt better. So after everyday of tortuous school, she would come home and write how she felt that day in a poetic form. After about 3 weeks she filled half of her notebook. One day, she took her notebook to school just incase she decides to write during class. All of a sudden, her notebook falls out of her bag and it gets left on the floor in her math class. A boy named James notices it and takes it home with him. He reads all of it that night and is astonished with what his eyes are seeing. He is so shocked that he never knew that the girl in his class felt such a way about life. The next day, James sees Alice and hesitates if he should give it back to her. “What if she thinks I have stolen it?” He says to himself. Finally, he gets the courage to approach her. “Um, hi,” James begins to say, “I found this notebook yesterday. I think it’s your’s.” Alice grabs it and is completely speechless because she cannot believe he found it. After a whole minute of silence Alice says,” You didn’t read it….right?” “Maybe a little.” He says back. Alice feels like her thoughts has been violated and starts to tear up. “If you ever need a friend you can always call me, you know. I know we aren’t close, but I’m always here for you.” Says James while giving her his number. James eventually leaves while Alice is left being surprised about what just happened. That night, Alice had nothing really to write because her day wasn’t bad. So she decides to give James a call. James answers. Alice’s heart nearly stops. They talk for about 2 hours straight. She hangs up the phone with a smile on her face. Then, she knows ,takes her notebook and opens it to a new page and writes: “A little piece of dark cloud turns to heaven. I get this feeling from the sound of his voice. This could b the greatest thing that has happened to me. I finally get the picture.” Then Alice closes the notebook and finally gets some sleep with no tears in her eyes. The next day later, Alice was so excited to see James in her math class. But for some reason, James never showed up. So after school, Alice rushed home and called him. He didn’t answer. So, she got on her face book and noticed that a lot of her school face book friend’s statues were talking about how James passed away last night because of suicide. Alice was freaking out and was really confused. “Why would James kill himself? He seemed like such a happy person!” Alice was so upset. A few days later was his funeral where Alice attended. James’ dad came up to talk about how James was such a great kid. Then he read James suicide note. It read, “ Dear family, there is no meaning in life. I’m sick of being pushed around. I’m sick of everyone saying I’m worthless and there’s no meaning of me living. Well, I think their actually right about me having no reason to live this time. I met a lot of good friends this year but not even their words can help my decision now. I think my decision is final. To all my friends and family, I want you guys to live as long as God permits. But, for me, it’s my time to leave behind what there is left to be left behind. I’m leaving behind mistakes, tears, hatred, and more. It’s my time. I love you. James Jared Williams.” Alice’s eyes couldn’t hold her tears any longer. She lost it. She had a breakdown right there, in the church where the funeral was being held. She left the chapel and headed to the lobby where no one was and just laid on the floor with barely and breath. She couldn’t stop thinking of him and how she wished he could of stay on earth longer. Alice went home and took the pills from the bathroom cabinet and headed to her room and grabbed a pen and her notebook. A hour later, her mom walked into her room and saw her laying on her floor dead. Her mom noticed something written in her notebook saying, “ This life is overrated. A friend told me it would be better as I keep going. Well, now I’m going to go see him. Goodbye.” Publication Date: June 6th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-denaejayy
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-william-shakespeare-the-comedy-of-errors/
William Shakespeare The Comedy of Errors PERSONS REPRESENTED. SOLINUS, Duke of Ephesus. AEGEON, a Merchant of Syracuse. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, Twin brothers and sons to Aegion and ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE, and Aemelia, but unknown to each other. DROMIO OF EPHESUS, Twin brothers, and attendants on DROMIO OF SYRACUSE, the two Antipholuses. BALTHAZAR, a Merchant. ANGELO, a Goldsmith. A MERCHANT, friend to Antipholus of Syracuse. PINCH, a Schoolmaster and a Conjurer. AEMILIA, Wife to Aegeon, an Abbess at Ephesus. ADRIANA, Wife to Antipholus of Ephesus. LUCIANA, her Sister. LUCE, her Servant. A COURTEZAN Gaoler, Officers, Attendants SCENE: Ephesus ACT I. SCENE 1. A hall in the DUKE'S palace. [Enter the DUKE, AEGEON, GAOLER, OFFICERS, and other ATTENDANTS.] AEGEON. Proceed, Solinus, to procure my fall, And, by the doom of death, end woes and all. DUKE. Merchant of Syracuse, plead no more; I am not partial to infringe our laws: The enmity and discord which of late Sprung from the rancorous outrage of your duke To merchants, our well-dealing countrymen, - Who, wanting guilders to redeem their lives, Have seal'd his rigorous statutes with their bloods, - Excludes all pity from our threat'ning looks. For, since the mortal and intestine jars 'Twixt thy seditious countrymen and us, It hath in solemn synods been decreed, Both by the Syracusians and ourselves, To admit no traffic to our adverse towns; Nay, more, If any born at Ephesus be seen At any Syracusian marts and fairs; - Again, if any Syracusian born Come to the bay of Ephesus, he dies, His goods confiscate to the Duke's dispose; Unless a thousand marks be levied, To quit the penalty and to ransom him. - Thy substance, valued at the highest rate, Cannot amount unto a hundred marks: Therefore by law thou art condemn'd to die. AEGEON. Yet this my comfort, - when your words are done, My woes end likewise with the evening sun. DUKE. Well, Syracusan, say, in brief, the cause Why thou departedst from thy native home, And for what cause thou cam'st to Ephesus. AEGEON. A heavier task could not have been impos'd Than I to speak my griefs unspeakable! Yet, that the world may witness that my end Was wrought by nature, not by vile offence, I'll utter what my sorrow gives me leave. In Syracuse was I born; and wed Unto a woman, happy but for me, And by me too, had not our hap been bad. With her I liv'd in joy; our wealth increas'd By prosperous voyages I often made To Epidamnum, till my factor's death, And he, - great care of goods at random left, - Drew me from kind embracements of my spouse: From whom my absence was not six months old, Before herself, - almost at fainting under The pleasing punishment that women bear, - Had made provision for her following me, And soon and safe arrived where I was. There had she not been long but she became A joyful mother of two goodly sons; And, which was strange, the one so like the other As could not be disdnguish'd but by names. That very hour, and in the self-same inn, A mean woman was delivered Of such a burden, male twins, both alike: Those, - for their parents were exceeding poor, - I bought, and brought up to attend my sons. My wife, not meanly proud of two such boys, Made daily motions for our home return: Unwilling I agreed; alas! too soon! We came aboard: A league from Epidamnum had we sail'd Before the always-wind-obeying deep Gave any tragic instance of our harm; But longer did we not retain much hope: For what obscured light the heavens did grant Did but convey unto our fearful minds A doubtful warrant of immediate death; Which though myself would gladly have embrac'd, Yet the incessant weepings of my wife, Weeping before for what she saw must come, And piteous plainings of the pretty babes, That mourn'd for fashion, ignorant what to fear, Forc'd me to seek delays for them and me. And this it was, - for other means was none. - The sailors sought for safety by our boat, And left the ship, then sinking-ripe, to us;: My wife, more careful for the latter-born, Had fast'ned him unto a small spare mast, Such as sea-faring men provide for storms: To him one of the other twins was bound, Whilst I had been like heedful of the other. The children thus dispos'd, my wife and I, Fixing our eyes on whom our care was fix'd, Fast'ned ourselves at either end the mast, And, floating straight, obedient to the stream, Were carried towards Corinth, as we thought. At length the sun, gazing upon the earth, Dispers'd those vapours that offended us; And, by the benefit of his wish'd light, The seas wax'd calm, and we discover'd Two ships from far making amain to us, - Of Corinth that, of Epidaurus this: But ere they came - O, let me say no more! - Gather the sequel by that went before. DUKE. Nay, forward, old man, do not break off so; For we may pity, though not pardon thee. AEGEON. O, had the gods done so, I had not now Worthily term'd them merciless to us! For, ere the ships could meet by twice five leagues, We were encount'red by a mighty rock, Which being violently borne upon, Our helpful ship was splitted in the midst; So that, in this unjust divorce of us, Fortune had left to both of us alike What to delight in, what to sorrow for. Her part, poor soul! seeming as burdened With lesser weight, but not with lesser woe, Was carried with more speed before the wind; And in our sight they three were taken up By fishermen of Corinth, as we thought. At length another ship had seiz'd on us; And, knowing whom it was their hap to save, Gave healthful welcome to their ship-wreck'd guests; And would have reft the fishers of their prey, Had not their bark been very slow of sail, And therefore homeward did they bend their course. - Thus have you heard me sever'd from my bliss; That by misfortunes was my life prolong'd, To tell sad stories of my own mishaps. DUKE. And, for the sake of them thou sorrowest for, Do me the favour to dilate at full What have befall'n of them and thee till now. AEGEON. My youngest boy, and yet my eldest care, At eighteen years became inquisitive After his brother, and importun'd me That his attendant, - so his case was like, Reft of his brother, but retain'd his name, - Might bear him company in the quest of him: Whom whilst I laboured of a love to see, I hazarded the loss of whom I lov'd. Five summers have I spent in furthest Greece, Roaming clean through the bounds of Asia, And, coasting homeward, came to Ephesus; Hopeless to find, yet loath to leave unsought Or that or any place that harbours men. But here must end the story of my life; And happy were I in my timely death, Could all my travels warrant me they live. DUKE. Hapless Aegeon, whom the fates have mark'd To bear the extremity of dire mishap! Now, trust me, were it not against our laws, Against my crown, my oath, my dignity, Which princes, would they, may not disannul, My soul should sue as advocate for thee. But though thou art adjudged to the death, And passed sentence may not be recall'd But to our honour's great disparagement, Yet will I favour thee in what I can: Therefore, merchant, I'll limit thee this day To seek thy help by beneficial help: Try all the friends thou hast in Ephesus: Beg thou, or borrow, to make up the sum, And live; if not, then thou art doom'd to die. - Gaoler, take him to thy custody. GAOLER. I will, my lord. AEGEON. Hopeless and helpless doth Aegeon wend. But to procrastinate his lifeless end. [Exeunt.] SCENE 2. A public place. [Enter ANTIPHOLUS and DROMIO OF SYRACUSE, and a MERCHANT.] MERCHANT. Therefore, give out you are of Epidamnum, Lest that your goods too soon be confiscate. This very day a Syracusian merchant Is apprehended for arrival here; And, not being able to buy out his life, According to the statute of the town, Dies ere the weary sun set in the west. - There is your money that I had to keep. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Go bear it to the Centaur, where we host, And stay there, Dromio, till I come to thee. Within this hour it will be dinner-time; Till that, I'll view the manners of the town, Peruse the traders, gaze upon the buildings, And then return and sleep within mine inn; For with long travel I am stiff and weary. - Get thee away. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Many a man would take you at your word, And go indeed, having so good a mean. [Exit DROMIO.] ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. A trusty villain, sir, that very oft, When I am dull with care and melancholy, Lightens my humour with his merry jests. What, will you walk with me about the town, And then go to my inn and dine with me? MERCHANT. I am invited, sir, to certain merchants, Of whom I hope to make much benefit: I crave your pardon. Soon, at five o'clock, Please you, I'll meet with you upon the mart, And afterward consort you till bed-time: My present business calls me from you now. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Farewell till then: I will go lose myself, And wander up and down to view the city. MERCHANT. Sir, I commend you to your own content. [Exit MERCHANT.] ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. He that commends me to mine own content Commends me to the thing I cannot get. I to the world am like a drop of water That in the ocean seeks another drop; Who, failing there to find his fellow forth, Unseen, inquisitive, confounds himself: So I, to find a mother and a brother, In quest of them, unhappy, lose myself. [Enter DROMIO OF EPHESUS.] Here comes the almanac of my true date. What now? How chance thou art return'd so soon? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Return'd so soon! rather approach'd too late. The capon burns, the pig falls from the spit; The clock hath strucken twelve upon the bell - My mistress made it one upon my cheek: She is so hot because the meat is cold; The meat is cold because you come not home,; You come not home because you have no stomach; You have no stomach, having broke your fast; But we, that know what 'tis to fast and pray, Are penitent for your default to-day. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Stop - in your wind, sir; tell me this, I pray: Where have you left the money that I gave you? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. O, - sixpence that I had o'Wednesday last To pay the saddler for my mistress' crupper; - The saddler had it, sir, I kept it not. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. I am not in a sportive humour now; Tell me, and dally not, where is the money? We being strangers here, how dar'st thou trust So great a charge from thine own custody? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. I pray you jest, sir, as you sit at dinner: I from my mistress come to you in post: If I return, I shall be post indeed; For she will score your fault upon my pate. Methinks your maw, like mine, should be your clock, And strike you home without a messenger. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Come, Dromio, come, these jests are out of season; Reserve them till a merrier hour than this. Where is the gold I gave in charge to thee? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. To me, sir? why, you gave no gold to me! ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Come on, sir knave, have done your foolishness, And tell me how thou hast dispos'd thy charge. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. My charge was but to fetch you from the mart Home to your house, the Phoenix, sir, to dinner: My mistress and her sister stay for you. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Now, as I am a Christian, answer me, In what safe place you have bestow'd my money: Or I shall break that merry sconce of yours, That stands on tricks when I am undispos'd; Where is the thousand marks thou hadst of me? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. I have some marks of yours upon my pate, Some of my mistress' marks upon my shoulders, But not a thousand marks between you both. - If I should pay your worship those again, Perchance you will not bear them patiently. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Thy mistress' marks! what mistress, slave, hast thou? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Your worship's wife, my mistress at the Phoenix; She that doth fast till you come home to dinner, And prays that you will hie you home to dinner. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. What, wilt thou flout me thus unto my face, Being forbid? There, take you that, sir knave. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. What mean you, sir? for God's sake hold your hands! Nay, an you will not, sir, I'll take my heels. [Exit DROMIO.] ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Upon my life, by some device or other, The villain is o'er-raught of all my money. They say this town is full of cozenage; As, nimble jugglers that deceive the eye, Dark-working sorcerers that change the mind, Soul-killing witches that deform the body, Disguised cheaters, prating mountebanks, And many such-like liberties of sin: If it prove so, I will be gone the sooner. I'll to the Centaur to go seek this slave: I greatly fear my money is not safe. [Exit.] ACT II. SCENE 1. A public place. [Enter ADRIANA and LUCIANA.] ADRIANA. Neither my husband nor the slave return'd That in such haste I sent to seek his master! Sure, Luciana, it is two o'clock. LUCIANA. Perhaps some merchant hath invited him, And from the mart he's somewhere gone to dinner. Good sister, let us dine, and never fret: A man is master of his liberty; Time is their master; and when they see time, They'll go or come. If so, be patient, sister. ADRIANA. Why should their liberty than ours be more? LUCIANA. Because their business still lies out o' door. ADRIANA. Look when I serve him so, he takes it ill. LUCIANA. O, know he is the bridle of your will. ADRIANA. There's none but asses will be bridled so. LUCIANA. Why, headstrong liberty is lash'd with woe. There's nothing situate under heaven's eye But hath his bound in earth, in sea, in sky; The beasts, the fishes, and the winged fowls, Are their males' subjects, and at their controls: Man, more divine, the masters of all these, Lord of the wide world and wild wat'ry seas, Indued with intellectual sense and souls Of more pre-eminence than fish and fowls, Are masters to their females, and their lords: Then let your will attend on their accords. ADRIANA. This servitude makes you to keep unwed. LUCIANA. Not this, but troubles of the marriage-bed. ADRIANA. But, were you wedded, you would bear some sway. LUCIANA. Ere I learn love, I'll practise to obey. ADRIANA. How if your husband start some other where? LUCIANA. Till he come home again, I would forbear. ADRIANA. Patience unmov'd, no marvel though she pause: They can be meek that have no other cause. A wretched soul, bruis'd with adversity, We bid be quiet when we hear it cry; But were we burd'ned with like weight of pain, As much, or more, we should ourselves complain: So thou, that hast no unkind mate to grieve thee, With urging helpless patience would relieve me: But if thou live to see like right bereft, This fool-begg'd patience in thee will be left. LUCIANA. Well, I will marry one day, but to try: - Here comes your man, now is your husband nigh. [Enter DROMIO OF EPHESUS.] ADRIANA. Say, is your tardy master now at hand? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Nay, he's at two hands with me, and that my two ears can witness. ADRIANA. Say, didst thou speak with him? know'st thou his mind? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Ay, ay, he told his mind upon mine ear. Beshrew his hand, I scarce could understand it. LUCIANA. Spake he so doubtfully thou could'st not feel his meaning? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Nay, he struck so plainly I could too well feel his blows; and withal so doubtfully that I could scarce understand them. ADRIANA. But say, I pr'ythee, is he coming home? It seems he hath great care to please his wife. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Why, mistress, sure my master is horn-mad. ADRIANA. Horn-mad, thou villain? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. I mean not cuckold-mad; but, sure, he's stark mad. When I desir'd him to come home to dinner, He ask'd me for a thousand marks in gold: "Tis dinner time' quoth I; 'My gold,' quoth he: 'Your meat doth burn' quoth I; 'My gold,' quoth he: 'Will you come home?' quoth I; 'My gold,' quoth he: 'Where is the thousand marks I gave thee, villain?' 'The pig' quoth I 'is burn'd'; 'My gold,' quoth he: 'My mistress, sir,' quoth I; 'Hang up thy mistress; I know not thy mistress; out on thy mistress!' LUCIANA. Quoth who? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Quoth my master: 'I know' quoth he 'no house, no wife, no mistress:' So that my errand, due unto my tongue, I thank him, I bare home upon my shoulders; For, in conclusion, he did beat me there. ADRIANA. Go back again, thou slave, and fetch him home. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Go back again! and be new beaten home? For God's sake, send some other messenger. ADRIANA. Back, slave, or I will break thy pate across. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. And he will bless that cross with other beating: Between you I shall have a holy head. ADRIANA. Hence, prating peasant: fch thy master home. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Am I so round with you, as you with me, That like a football you do spurn me thus? You spurn me hence, and he will spurn me hither: If I last in this service, you must case me in leather. [Exit.] LUCIANA. Fie, how impatience low'reth in your face! ADRIANA. His company must do his minions grace, Whilst I at home starve for a merry look. Hath homely age the alluring beauty took From my poor cheek? then he hath wasted it: Are my discourses dull? barren my wit? If voluble and sharp discourse be marr'd, Unkindness blunts it more than marble hard: Do their gay vestments his affections bait? That's not my fault; he's master of my state: What ruins are in me that can be found By him not ruin'd? then is he the ground Of my defeatures: my decayed fair A sunny look of his would soon repair; But, too unruly deer, he breaks the pale And feeds from home; poor I am but his stale. LUCIANA. Self-harming jealousy! - fie, beat it hence. ADRIANA. Unfeeling fools can with such wrongs dispense. I know his eye doth homage otherwhere; Or else what lets it but he would be here? Sister, you know he promis'd me a chain; - Would that alone, alone he would detain, So he would keep fair quarter with his bed! I see the jewel best enamelled Will lose his beauty; yet the gold 'bides still That others touch, yet often touching will Wear gold; and no man that hath a name By falsehood and corruption doth it shame. Since that my beauty cannot please his eye, I'll weep what's left away, and weeping die. LUCIANA. How many fond fools serve mad jealousy! [Exeunt.] SCENE 2. The same. [Enter ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE.] ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. The gold I gave to Dromio is laid up Safe at the Centaur; and the heedful slave Is wander'd forth in care to seek me out. By computation and mine host's report I could not speak with Dromio since at first I sent him from the mart. See, here he comes. [Enter DROMIO OF SYRACUSE.] How now, sir! is your merry humour alter'd? As you love strokes, so jest with me again. You know no Centaur? you receiv'd no gold? Your mistress sent to have me home to dinner? My house was at the Phoenix? Wast thou mad, That thus so madly thou didst answer me? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. What answer, sir? when spake I such a word? ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Even now, even here, not half-an-hour since. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. I did not see you since you sent me hence, Home to the Centaur with the gold you gave me. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Villain, thou didst deny the gold's receipt; And told'st me of a mistress and a dinner; For which, I hope, thou felt'st I was displeas'd. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. I am glad to see you in this merry vein: What means this jest? I pray you, master, tell me. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Yea, dost thou jeer and flout me in the teeth? Think'st thou I jest? Hold, take thou that, and that. [Beating him.] DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Hold, sir, for God's sake: now your jest is earnest: Upon what bargain do you give it me? ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Because that I familiarly sometimes Do use you for my fool, and chat with you, Your sauciness will jest upon my love, And make a common of my serious hours. When the sun shines let foolish gnats make sport, But creep in crannies when he hides his beams. If you will jest with me, know my aspect, And fashion your demeanour to my looks, Or I will beat this method in your sconce. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Sconce, call you it? so you would leave battering, I had rather have it a head: an you use these blows long, I must get a sconce for my head, and ensconce it too; or else I shall seek my wit in my shoulders. - But I pray, sir, why am I beaten? ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Dost thou not know? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Nothing, sir, but that I am beaten. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Shall I tell you why? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Ay, sir, and wherefore; for, they say, every why hath a wherefore. - ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Why, first, - for flouting me; and then wherefore, For urging it the second time to me. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Was there ever any man thus beaten out of season, When in the why and the wherefore is neither rhyme nor reason? - Well, sir, I thank you. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Thank me, sir! for what? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Marry, sir, for this something that you gave me for nothing. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. I'll make you amends next, to give you nothing for something. - But say, sir, is it dinner-time? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. No, sir; I think the meat wants that I have. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. In good time, sir, what's that? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Basting. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Well, sir, then 'twill be dry. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. If it be, sir, I pray you eat none of it. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Your reason? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Lest it make you choleric, and purchase me another dry basting. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Well, sir, learn to jest in good time: There's a time for all things. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. I durst have denied that before you were so choleric. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. By what rule, sir? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Marry, sir, by a rule as plain as the plain bald pate of Father Time himself. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Let's hear it. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. There's no time for a man to recover his hair, that grows bald by nature. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. May he not do it by fine and recovery? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Yes, to pay a fine for a peruke, and recover the lost hair of another man. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Why is Time such a niggard of hair, being, as it is, so plentiful an excrement? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Because it is a blessing that he bestows on beasts: and what he hath scanted men in hair he hath given them in wit. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Why, but there's many a man hath more hair than wit. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Not a man of those but he hath the wit to lose his hair. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Why, thou didst conclude hairy men plain dealers without wit. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. The plainer dealer, the sooner lost: yet he loseth it in a kind of jollity. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. For what reason? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. For two; and sound ones too. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Nay, not sound, I pray you. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Sure ones, then. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Nay, not sure, in a thing falsing. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Certain ones, then. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Name them. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. The one, to save the money that he spends in tiring; the other, that at dinner they should not drop in his porridge. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. You would all this time have proved there is no time for all things. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Marry, and did, sir; namely, no time to recover hair lost by nature. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. But your reason was not substantial why there is no time to recover. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Thus I mend it: Time himself is bald, and, therefore, to the world's end will have bald followers. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. I knew 't'would be a bald conclusion: But, soft! who wafts us yonder? [Enter ADRIANA and LUCIANA.] ADRIANA. Ay, ay, Antipholus, look strange and frown; Some other mistress hath thy sweet aspects: I am not Adriana, nor thy wife. The time was, once, when thou unurg'd wouldst vow That never words were music to thine ear, That never object pleasing in thine eye, That never touch well welcome to thy hand, That never meat sweet-savour'd in thy taste, Unless I spake, or look'd, or touch'd, or carv'd to thee. How comes it now, my husband, oh, how comes it, That thou art then estranged from thyself? Thyself I call it, being strange to me, That, undividable, incorporate, Am better than thy dear self's better part. Ah, do not tear away thyself from me; For know, my love, as easy mayst thou fall A drop of water in the breaking gulf, And take unmingled thence that drop again, Without addition or diminishing, As take from me thyself, and not me too. How dearly would it touch thee to the quick, Should'st thou but hear I were licentious, And that this body, consecrate to thee, By ruffian lust should be contaminate! Wouldst thou not spit at me and spurn at me, And hurl the name of husband in my face, And tear the stain'd skin off my harlot brow, And from my false hand cut the wedding-ring, And break it with a deep-divorcing vow? I know thou canst; and, therefore, see thou do it. I am possess'd with an adulterate blot; My blood is mingled with the crime of lust: For if we two be one, and thou play false, I do digest the poison of thy flesh, Being strumpeted by thy contagion. Keep then fair league and truce with thy true bed; I live dis-stain'd, thou undishonoured. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Plead you to me, fair dame? I know you not: In Ephesus I am but two hours old, As strange unto your town as to your talk; Who, every word by all my wit being scann'd, Want wit in all one word to understand. LUCIANA. Fie, brother! how the world is chang'd with you: When were you wont to use my sister thus? She sent for you by Dromio home to dinner. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. By Dromio? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. By me? ADRIANA. By thee; and this thou didst return from him, - That he did buffet thee, and in his blows Denied my house for his, me for his wife. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Did you converse, sir, with this gentlewoman? What is the course and drift of your compact? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. I, sir? I never saw her till this time. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Villain, thou liest; for even her very words Didst thou deliver to me on the mart. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. I never spake with her in all my life. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. How can she thus, then, call us by our names, Unless it be by inspiration? ADRIANA. How ill agrees it with your gravity To counterfeit thus grossly with your slave, Abetting him to thwart me in my mood! Be it my wrong, you are from me exempt, But wrong not that wrong with a more contempt. Come, I will fasten on this sleeve of thine: Thou art an elm, my husband, I a vine, Whose weakness, married to thy stronger state, Makes me with thy strength to communicate: If aught possess thee from me, it is dross, Usurping ivy, brier, or idle moss; Who all, for want of pruning, with intrusion Infect thy sap, and live on thy confusion. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. To me she speaks; she moves me for her theme: What, was I married to her in my dream? Or sleep I now, and think I hear all this? What error drives our eyes and ears amiss? Until I know this sure uncertainty I'll entertain the offer'd fallacy. LUCIANA. Dromio, go bid the servants spread for dinner. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. O, for my beads! I cross me for a sinner. This is the fairy land; - O spite of spites! We talk with goblins, owls, and sprites; If we obey them not, this will ensue, They'll suck our breath, or pinch us black and blue. LUCIANA. Why prat'st thou to thyself, and answer'st not? Dromio, thou drone, thou snail, thou slug, thou sot! DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. I am transformed, master, am not I? ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. I think thou art in mind, and so am I. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Nay, master, both in mind and in my shape. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Thou hast thine own form. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. No, I am an ape. LUCIANA. If thou art chang'd to aught, 'tis to an ass. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. 'Tis true; she rides me, and I long for grass. 'Tis so, I am an ass; else it could never be But I should know her as well as she knows me. ADRIANA. Come, come, no longer will I be a fool, To put the finger in the eye and weep, Whilst man and master laughs my woes to scorn. - Come, sir, to dinner; - Dromio, keep the gate: - Husband, I'll dine above with you to-day, And shrive you of a thousand idle pranks: - Sirrah, if any ask you for your master, Say he dines forth, and let no creature enter. - Come, sister: - Dromio, play the porter well. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Am I in earth, in heaven, or in hell? Sleeping or waking, mad, or well-advis'd? Known unto these, and to myself disguis'd! I'll say as they say, and persever so, And in this mist at all adventures go. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Master, shall I be porter at the gate? ADRIANA. Ay; and let none enter, lest I break your pate. LUCIANA. Come, come, Antipholus, we dine too late. [Exeunt.] ACT III. SCENE 1. The same. [Enter ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, DROMIO OF EPHESUS, ANGELO, and BALTHAZAR.] ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Good Signior Angelo, you must excuse us all. My wife is shrewish when I keep not hours: Say that I linger'd with you at your shop To see the making of her carcanet, And that to-morrow you will bring it home. But here's a villain that would face me down. He met me on the mart; and that I beat him, And charg'd him with a thousand marks in gold; And that I did deny my wife and house: - Thou drunkard, thou, what didst thou mean by this? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Say what you will, sir, but I know what I know: That you beat me at the mart I have your hand to show; If the skin were parchment, and the blows you gave were ink, Your own handwriting would tell you what I think. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. I think thou art an ass. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Marry, so it doth appear By the wrongs I suffer and the blows I bear. I should kick, being kick'd; and being at that pass, You would keep from my heels, and beware of an ass. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. You are sad, Signior Balthazar; pray God our cheer May answer my good will and your good welcome here. BALTHAZAR. I hold your dainties cheap, sir, and your welcome dear. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. O, Signior Balthazar, either at flesh or fish, A table full of welcome makes scarce one dainty dish. BALTHAZAR. Good meat, sir, is common; that every churl affords. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. And welcome more common; for that's nothing but words. BALTHAZAR Small cheer and great welcome makes a merry feast. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Ay, to a niggardly host and more sparing guest. But though my cates be mean, take them in good part; Better cheer may you have, but not with better heart. But, soft; my door is lock'd: go bid them let us in. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Maud, Bridget, Marian, Cicely, Gillian, Jen! DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. [Within] Mome, malt-horse, capon, coxcomb, idiot, patch! Either get thee from the door, or sit down at the hatch: Dost thou conjure for wenches, that thou call'st for such store, When one is one too many? Go, get thee from the door. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. What patch is made our porter? My master stays in the street. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Let him walk from whence he came, lest he catch cold on's feet. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Who talks within there? Ho, open the door! DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Right, sir; I'll tell you when an you'll tell me wherefore. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Wherefore! For my dinner: I have not dined to-day. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Nor to-day here you must not; come again when you may. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. What art thou that keep'st me out from the house I owe? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. The porter for this time, sir, and my name is Dromio. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. O villain, thou hast stolen both mine office and my name; The one ne'er got me credit, the other mickle blame. If thou hadst been Dromio to-day in my place, Thou wouldst have chang'd thy face for a name, or thy name for an ass. LUCE. [Within.] What a coil is there! Dromio, who are those at the gate? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Let my master in, Luce. LUCE. Faith, no, he comes too late; And so tell your master. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. O Lord, I must laugh; - Have at you with a proverb: - Shall I set in my staff? LUCE. Have at you with another: that's - When? can you tell? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. If thy name be called Luce, - Luce, thou hast answer'd him well. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Do you hear, you minion? you'll let us in, I hope? LUCE. I thought to have ask'd you. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. And you said no. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. So, Come, help: well struck; there was blow for blow. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Thou baggage, let me in. LUCE. Can you tell for whose sake? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Master, knock the door hard. LUCE. Let him knock till it ache. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. You'll cry for this, minion, if I beat the door down. LUCE. What needs all that, and a pair of stocks in the town? ADRIANA. [Within.] Who is that at the door, that keeps all this noise? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. By my troth, your town is troubled with unruly boys. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Are you there, wife? you might have come before. ADRIANA. Your wife, sir knave! go, get you from the door. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. If you went in pain, master, this knave would go sore. ANGELO. Here is neither cheer, sir, nor welcome: we would fain have either. BALTHAZAR. In debating which was best, we shall part with neither. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. They stand at the door, master; bid them welcome hither. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. There is something in the wind, that we cannot get in. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. You would say so, master, if your garments were thin. Your cake here is warm within; you stand here in the cold: It would make a man mad as a buck, to be so bought and sold. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Go, fetch me something, I'll break ope the gate. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Break any breaking here, and I'll break your knave's pate. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. A man may break a word with you, sir; and words are but wind; Ay, and break it in your face, so he break it not behind. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. It seems thou want'st breaking; out upon thee, hind! DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Here's too much out upon thee: I pray thee, let me in. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Ay, when fowls have no feathers and fish have no fin. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Well, I'll break in; go borrow me a crow. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. A crow without feather; master, mean you so? For a fish without a fin, there's a fowl without a feather: If a crow help us in, sirrah, we'll pluck a crow together. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Go, get thee gone; fetch me an iron crow. BALTHAZAR. Have patience, sir: O, let it not be so: Herein you war against your reputation, And draw within the compass of suspect The unviolated honour of your wife. Once this, - your long experience of her wisdom, Her sober virtue, years, and modesty, Plead on her part some cause to you unknown; And doubt not, sir, but she will well excuse Why at this time the doors are made against you. Be rul'd by me; depart in patience, And let us to the Tiger all to dinner: And, about evening, come yourself alone, To know the reason of this strange restraint. If by strong hand you offer to break in, Now in the stirring passage of the day, A vulgar comment will be made of it; And that supposed by the common rout Against your yet ungalled estimation That may with foul intrusion enter in, And dwell upon your grave when you are dead: For slander lives upon succession, For ever hous'd where it gets possession. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. You have prevail'd. I will depart in quiet, And, in despite of mirth, mean to be merry. I know a wench of excellent discourse, - Pretty and witty; wild, and yet, too, gentle; - There will we dine: this woman that I mean, My wife, - but, I protest, without desert, - Hath oftentimes upbraided me withal; To her will we to dinner. - Get you home And fetch the chain: by this I know 'tis made: Bring it, I pray you, to the Porcupine; For there's the house; that chain will I bestow, - Be it for nothing but to spite my wife, - - Upon mine hostess there: good sir, make haste: Since mine own doors refuse to entertain me, I'll knock elsewhere, to see if they'll disdain me. ANGELO. I'll meet you at that place some hour hence. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Do so; this jest shall cost me some expense. [Exeunt.] SCENE 2. The same. [Enter LUCIANA with ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE.] LUCIANA. And may it be that you have quite forgot A husband's office? Shall, Antipholus, Even in the spring of love, thy love-springs rot? Shall love, in building, grow so ruinate? If you did wed my sister for her wealth, Then for her wealth's sake use her with more kindness; Or, if you like elsewhere, do it by stealth; Muffle your false love with some show of blindness; Let not my sister read it in your eye; Be not thy tongue thy own shame's orator; Look sweet, speak fair, become disloyalty; Apparel vice like virtue's harbinger; Bear a fair presence though your heart be tainted; Teach sin the carriage of a holy saint; Be secret-false: what need she be acquainted? What simple thief brags of his own attaint? 'Tis double wrong, to truant with your bed And let her read it in thy looks at board: - Shame hath a bastard fame, well managed; Ill deeds is doubled with an evil word. Alas, poor women! make us but believe, Being compact of credit, that you love us: Though others have the arm, show us the sleeve; We in your motion turn, and you may move us. Then, gentle brother, get you in again; Comfort my sister, cheer her, call her wife: 'Tis holy sport to be a little vain When the sweet breath of flattery conquers strife. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Sweet mistress, - what your name is else, I know not, Nor by what wonder you do hit on mine, - Less, in your knowledge and your grace, you show not Than our earth's wonder: more than earth divine. Teach me, dear creature, how to think and speak; Lay open to my earthy gross conceit, Smother'd in errors, feeble, shallow, weak, The folded meaning of your words' deceit. Against my soul's pure truth why labour you To make it wander in an unknown field? Are you a god? would you create me new? Transform me, then, and to your power I'll yield. But if that I am I, then well I know Your weeping sister is no wife of mine, Nor to her bed no homage do I owe: Far more, far more, to you do I decline. O, train me not, sweet mermaid, with thy note, To drown me in thy sister's flood of tears: Sing, siren, for thyself, and I will dote; Spread o'er the silver waves thy golden hairs, And as a bed I'll take thee, and there lie; And, in that glorious supposition, think He gains by death that hath such means to die: - Let love, being light, be drowned if she sink! LUCIANA. What, are you mad, that you do reason so? ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Not mad, but mated; how, I do not know. LUCIANA. It is a fault that springeth from your eye. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. For gazing on your beams, fair sun, being by. LUCIANA. Gaze where you should, and that will clear your sight. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. As good to wink, sweet love, as look on night. LUCIANA. Why call you me love? call my sister so. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Thy sister's sister. LUCIANA. That's my sister. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. No; It is thyself, mine own self's better part; Mine eye's clear eye, my dear heart's dearer heart; My food, my fortune, and my sweet hope's aim, My sole earth's heaven, and my heaven's claim. LUCIANA. All this my sister is, or else should be. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Call thyself sister, sweet, for I aim thee; Thee will I love, and with thee lead my life: Thou hast no husband yet, nor I no wife; Give me thy hand. LUCIANA. O, soft, sir, hold you still; I'll fetch my sister to get her good-will. [Exit LUCIANA.] [Enter from the house of ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, DROMIO OF SYRACUSE.] ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Why, how now, Dromio? where runn'st thou so fast? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Do you know me, sir? am I Dromio? am I your man? am I myself? ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Thou art Dromio, thou art my man, thou art thyself. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. I am an ass, I am a woman's man, and beside myself. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. What woman's man? and how besides thyself? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Marry, sir, besides myself, I am due to a woman; one that claims me, one that haunts me, one that will have me. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. What claim lays she to thee? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Marry, sir, such claim as you would lay to your horse: and she would have me as a beast; not that, I being a beast, she would have me; but that she, being a very beastly creature, lays claim to me. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. What is she? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. A very reverent body; ay, such a one as a man may not speak of without he say sir-reverence. I have but lean luck in the match, and yet is she a wondrous fat marriage. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. How dost thou mean? - a fat marriage? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Marry, sir, she's the kitchen-wench, and all grease; and I know not what use to put her to, but to make a lamp of her and run from her by her own light. I warrant, her rags, and the tallow in them will burn a Poland winter: if she lives till doomsday, she'll burn week longer than the whole world. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. What complexion is she of? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Swart, like my shoe; but her face nothing like so clean kept: for why? she sweats, a man may go over shoes in the grime of it. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. That's a fault that water will mend. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. No, sir, 'tis in grain; Noah's flood could not do it. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. What's her name? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Nell, sir; but her name and three-quarters, that is an ell and three quarters, will not measure her from hip to hip. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Then she bears some breadth? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. No longer from head to foot than from hip to hip: she is spherical, like a globe: I could find out countries in her. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. In what part of her body stands Ireland? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Marry, sir, in her buttocks; I found it out by the bogs. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Where Scotland? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. I found it by the barrenness, hard in the palm of the hand. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Where France? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. In her forehead; armed and reverted, making war against her hair. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Where England? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. I looked for the chalky cliffs, but I could find no whiteness in them; but I guess it stood in her chin, by the salt rheum that ran between France and it. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Where Spain? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Faith, I saw it not; but I felt it hot in her breath. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Where America, - the Indies? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. O, sir, upon her nose, an o'er embellished with rubies, carbuncles, sapphires, declining their rich aspect to the hot breath of Spain; who sent whole armadoes of carracks to be ballast at her nose. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Where stood Belgia, - the Netherlands? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. O, sir, I did not look so low. - To conclude: this drudge or diviner laid claim to me; called me Dromio; swore I was assured to her; told me what privy marks I had about me, as the mark of my shoulder, the mole in my neck, the great wart on my left arm, that I, amazed, ran from her as a witch: and, I think, if my breast had not been made of faith and my heart of steel, she had transformed me to a curtail-dog, and made me turn i' the wheel. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Go, hie thee presently post to the road; An if the wind blow any way from shore, I will not harbour in this town to-night. If any bark put forth, come to the mart, Where I will walk till thou return to me. If every one knows us, and we know none, 'Tis time, I think, to trudge, pack and be gone. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. As from a bear a man would run for life, So fly I from her that would be my wife. [Exit.] ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. There's none but witches do inhabit here; And therefore 'tis high time that I were hence. She that doth call me husband, even my soul Doth for a wife abhor; but her fair sister, Possess'd with such a gentle sovereign grace, Of such enchanting presence and discourse, Hath almost made me traitor to myself: But, lest myself be guilty to self-wrong, I'll stop mine ears against the mermaid's song. [Enter ANGELO.] ANGELO. Master Antipholus? ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Ay, that's my name. ANGELO. I know it well, sir. Lo, here is the chain; I thought to have ta'en you at the Porcupine: The chain unfinish'd made me stay thus long. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. What is your will that I shall do with this? ANGELO. What please yourself, sir; I have made it for you. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Made it for me, sir! I bespoke it not. ANGELO. Not once nor twice, but twenty times you have: Go home with it, and please your wife withal; And soon at supper-time I'll visit you, And then receive my money for the chain. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. I pray you, sir, receive the money now, For fear you ne'er see chain nor money more. ANGELO. You are a merry man, sir; fare you well. [Exit.] ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. What I should think of this I cannot tell: But this I think, there's no man is so vain That would refuse so fair an offer'd chain. I see a man here needs not live by shifts, When in the streets he meets such golden gifts. I'll to the mart, and there for Dromio stay; If any ship put out, then straight away. [Exit.] ACT IV. SCENE 1. The same. [Enter a MERCHANT, ANGELO, and an OFFICER.] MERCHANT. You know, since Pentecost the sum is due, And since I have not much importun'd you; Nor now I had not, but that I am bound To Persia, and want guilders for my voyage; Therefore make present satisfaction, Or I'll attach you by this officer. ANGELO. Even just the sum that I do owe to you Is growing to me by Antipholus; And in the instant that I met with you He had of me a chain; at five o'clock I shall receive the money for the same: Pleaseth you walk with me down to his house, I will discharge my bond, and thank you too. [Enter ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, and DROMIO OF EPHESUS.] OFFICER. That labour may you save: see where he comes. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. While I go to the goldsmith's house, go thou And buy a rope's end; that will I bestow Among my wife and her confederates, For locking me out of my doors by day. - But, soft; I see the goldsmith: get thee gone; Buy thou a rope, and bring it home to me. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. I buy a thousand pound a year! I buy a rope! [Exit DROMIO.] ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. A man is well holp up that trusts to you: I promised your presence, and the chain; But neither chain nor goldsmith came to me: Belike you thought our love would last too long, If it were chain'd together; and therefore came not. ANGELO. Saving your merry humour, here's the note, How much your chain weighs to the utmost carat; The fineness of the gold, and chargeful fashion; Which doth amount to three odd ducats more Than I stand debted to this gentleman: I pray you, see him presently discharg'd, For he is bound to sea, and stays but for it. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. I am not furnished with the present money; Besides I have some business in the town: Good Signior, take the stranger to my house, And with you take the chain, and bid my wife Disburse the sum on the receipt thereof; Perchance I will be there as soon as you. ANGELO. Then you will bring the chain to her yourself? ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. No; bear it with you, lest I come not time enough. ANGELO. Well, sir, I will: have you the chain about you? ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. An if I have not, sir, I hope you have, Or else you may return without your money. ANGELO. Nay, come, I pray you, sir, give me the chain; Both wind and tide stays for this gentleman, And I, to blame, have held him here too long. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Good Lord, you use this dalliance to excuse Your breach of promise to the Porcupine: I should have chid you for not bringing it, But, like a shrew, you first begin to brawl. MERCHANT. The hour steals on; I pray you, sir, despatch. ANGELO. You hear how he importunes me: the chain, - ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Why, give it to my wife, and fetch your money. ANGELO. Come, come, you know I gave it you even now; Either send the chain or send by me some token. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Fie! now you run this humour out of breath: Come, where's the chain? I pray you, let me see it. MERCHANT. My business cannot brook this dalliance: Good sir, say whe'r you'll answer me or no; If not, I'll leave him to the officer. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. I answer you! What should I answer you? ANGELO. The money that you owe me for the chain. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. I owe you none till I receive the chain. ANGELO. You know I gave it you half-an-hour since. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. You gave me none: you wrong me much to say so. ANGELO. You wrong me more, sir, in denying it: Consider how it stands upon my credit. MERCHANT. Well, officer, arrest him at my suit. OFFICER. I do; and charge you in the duke's name to obey me. ANGELO. This touches me in reputation: Either consent to pay this sum for me, Or I attach you by this officer. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Consent to pay thee that I never had! Arrest me, foolish fellow, if thou dar'st. ANGELO. Here is thy fee; arrest him, officer: - I would not spare my brother in this case, If he should scorn me so apparently. OFFICER. I do arrest you, sir: you hear the suit. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. I do obey thee till I give thee bail: - But, sirrah, you shall buy this sport as dear As all the metal in your shop will answer. ANGELO. Sir, sir, I shall have law in Ephesus, To your notorious shame, I doubt it not. [Enter DROMIO OF SYRACUSE.] DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Master, there's a bark of Epidamnum That stays but till her owner comes aboard, And then, sir, bears away: our fraughtage, sir, I have convey'd aboard; and I have bought The oil, the balsamum, and aqua-vitae. The ship is in her trim; the merry wind Blows fair from land; they stay for nought at all But for their owner, master, and yourself. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. How now! a madman? Why, thou peevish sheep, What ship of Epidamnum stays for me? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. A ship you sent me to, to hire waftage. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Thou drunken slave! I sent the for a rope; And told thee to what purpose and what end. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. You sent me, sir, for a rope's end as soon: You sent me to the bay, sir, for a bark. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. I will debate this matter at more leisure, And teach your ears to list me with more heed. To Adriana, villain, hie thee straight: Give her this key, and tell her, in the desk That's cover'd o'er with Turkish tapestry There is a purse of ducats; let her send it: Tell her I am arrested in the street, And that shall bail me: hie thee, slave; be gone. On, officer, to prison till it come. [Exeunt MERCHANT, ANGELO, OFFICER, and ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS.] DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. To Adriana! that is where we din'd, Where Dowsabel did claim me for her husband: She is too big, I hope, for me to compass. Thither I must, although against my will, For servants must their masters' minds fulfil. [Exit.] SCENE 2. The same. [Enter ADRIANA and LUCIANA.] ADRIANA. Ah, Luciana, did he tempt thee so? Might'st thou perceive austerely in his eye That he did plead in earnest, yea or no? Look'd he or red or pale, or sad or merrily? What observation mad'st thou in this case Of his heart's meteors tilting in his face? LUCIANA. First he denied you had in him no right. ADRIANA. He meant he did me none; the more my spite. LUCIANA. Then swore he that he was a stranger here. ADRIANA. And true he swore, though yet forsworn he were. LUCIANA. Then pleaded I for you. ADRIANA. And what said he? LUCIANA. That love I begg'd for you he begg'd of me. ADRIANA. With what persuasion did he tempt thy love? LUCIANA. With words that in an honest suit might move. First he did praise my beauty, then my speech. ADRIANA. Didst speak him fair? LUCIANA. Have patience, I beseech. ADRIANA. I cannot, nor I will not hold me still; My tongue, though not my heart, shall have his will. He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere, Ill-fac'd, worse bodied, shapeless everywhere; Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind; Stigmatical in making, worse in mind. LUCIANA. Who would be jealous then of such a one? No evil lost is wail'd when it is gone. ADRIANA. Ah! but I think him better than I say, And yet would herein others' eyes were worse: Far from her nest the lapwing cries, away; My heart prays for him, though my tongue do curse. [Enter DROMIO OF SYRACUSE.] DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Here, go; the desk, the purse: sweet now, make haste. LUCIANA. How hast thou lost thy breath? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. By running fast. ADRIANA. Where is thy master, Dromio? is he well? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. No, he's in Tartar limbo, worse than hell. A devil in an everlasting garment hath him; One whose hard heart is button'd up with steel; A fiend, a fairy, pitiless and rough; A wolf - nay worse, a fellow all in buff; A back-friend, a shoulder-clapper, one that countermands The passages of alleys, creeks, and narrow lands; A hound that runs counter, and yet draws dry foot well; One that, before the judgment, carries poor souls to hell. ADRIANA. Why, man, what is the matter? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. I do not know the matter: he is 'rested on the case. ADRIANA. What, is he arrested? tell me at whose suit? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. I know not at whose suit he is arrested, well; But he's in a suit of buff which 'rested him, that can I tell. Will you send him, mistress, redemption, the money in his desk? ADRIANA. Go fetch it, sister. This I wonder at, [Exit LUCIANA] Thus he unknown to me should be in debt. - Tell me, was he arrested on a band? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Not on a band, but on a stronger thing; A chain, a chain: do you not hear it ring? ADRIANA. What, the chain? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. No, no, the bell; 'tis time that I were gone. It was two ere I left him, and now the clock strikes one. ADRIANA. The hours come back! that did I never hear. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. O yes. If any hour meet a sergeant, 'a turns back for very fear. ADRIANA. As if time were in debt! how fondly dost thou reason! DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Time is a very bankrupt, and owes more than he's worth to season. Nay, he's a thief too: have you not heard men say That Time comes stealing on by night and day? If he be in debt and theft, and a sergeant in the way, Hath he not reason to turn back an hour in a day? [Enter LUCIANA.] ADRIANA. Go, Dromio, there's the money, bear it straight; And bring thy master home immediately. - Come, sister; I am press'd down with conceit- Conceit my comfort and my injury. [Exeunt.] SCENE 3. The same. [Enter ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE.] ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. There's not a man I meet but doth salute me As if I were their well-acquainted friend; And every one doth call me by my name. Some tender money to me, some invite me; Some other give me thanks for kindnesses; Some offer me commodities to buy; Even now a tailor call'd me in his shop, And show'd me silks that he had bought for me, And therewithal took measure of my body. Sure, these are but imaginary wiles, And Lapland sorcerers inhabit here. [Enter DROMIO OF SYRACUSE.] DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Master, here's the gold you sent me for. What, have you got the picture of old Adam new apparelled? ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. What gold is this? What Adam dost thou mean? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Not that Adam that kept the paradise, but that Adam that keeps the prison; he that goes in the calf's skin that was killed for the Prodigal; he that came behind you, sir, like an evil angel, and bid you forsake your liberty. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. I understand thee not. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. No? Why, 'tis a plain case: he that went like a bass-viol in a case of leather; the man, sir, that, when gentlemen are tired, gives them a sob, and 'rests them; he, sir, that takes pity on decayed men, and gives them suits of durance; he that sets up his rest to do more exploits with his mace than a morris-pike. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. What! thou mean'st an officer? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Ay, sir, - the sergeant of the band: that brings any man to answer it that breaks his band; one that thinks a man always going to bed, and says 'God give you good rest!' ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Well, sir, there rest in your foolery. Is there any ship puts forth to-night? may we be gone? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Why, sir, I brought you word an hour since that the bark Expedition put forth to-night; and then were you hindered by the sergeant, to tarry for the hoy, Delay: here are the angels that you sent for to deliver you. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. The fellow is distract, and so am I; And here we wander in illusions: Some blessed power deliver us from hence! [Enter a COURTEZAN.] COURTEZAN. Well met, well met, Master Antipholus. I see, sir, you have found the goldsmith now: Is that the chain you promis'd me to-day? ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Satan, avoid! I charge thee, tempt me not! DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Master, is this Mistress Satan? ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. It is the devil. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Nay, she is worse, - she is the devil's dam; and here she comes in the habit of a light wench; and thereof comes that the wenches say 'God damn me!' That's as much to say 'God make me a light wench!' It is written they appear to men like angels of light: light is an effect of fire, and fire will burn; ergo, light wenches will burn: come not near her. COURTEZAN. Your man and you are marvellous merry, sir. Will you go with me? We'll mend our dinner here. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Master, if you do; expect spoon-meat, or bespeak a long spoon. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Why, Dromio? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Marry, he must have a long spoon that must eat with the devil. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Avoid then, fiend! What tell'st thou me of supping? Thou art, as you are all, a sorceress; I conjure thee to leave me and be gone. COURTEZAN. Give me the ring of mine you had at dinner, Or, for my diamond, the chain you promis'd, And I'll be gone, sir, and not trouble you. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Some devils ask but the paring of one's nail, A rush, a hair, a drop of blood, a pin, A nut, a cherry-stone; but she, more covetous, Would have a chain. Master, be wise; an if you give it her, The devil will shake her chain, and fright us with it. COURTEZAN. I pray you, sir, my ring, or else the chain; I hope you do not mean to cheat me so. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Avaunt, thou witch! Come, Dromio, let us go. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Fly pride, says the peacock: Mistress, that you know. [Exeunt ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE and DROMIO OF SYRACUSE.] COURTEZAN. Now, out of doubt, Antipholus is mad, Else would he never so demean himself: A ring he hath of mine worth forty ducats, And for the same he promis'd me a chain; Both one and other he denies me now: The reason that I gather he is mad, - Besides this present instance of his rage, - Is a mad tale he told to-day at dinner, Of his own doors being shut against his entrance. Belike his wife, acquainted with his fits, On purpose shut the doors against his way. My way is now to hie home to his house, And tell his wife that, being lunatic, He rush'd into my house and took perforce My ring away: this course I fittest choose, For forty ducats is too much to lose. [Exit.] SCENE 4. The same. [Enter ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS and an OFFICER.] ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Fear me not, man; I will not break away: I'll give thee, ere I leave thee, so much money, To warrant thee, as I am 'rested for. My wife is in a wayward mood to-day; And will not lightly trust the messenger That I should be attach'd in Ephesus; I tell you, 'twill sound harshly in her ears. [Enter DROMIO OF EPHESUS, with a rope's end.] Here comes my man: I think he brings the money. How now, sir! have you that I sent you for? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Here's that, I warrant you, will pay them all. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. But where's the money? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Why, sir, I gave the money for the rope. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Five hundred ducats, villain, for rope? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. I'll serve you, sir, five hundred at the rate. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. To what end did I bid thee hie thee home? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. To a rope's end, sir; and to that end am I return'd. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. And to that end, sir, I will welcome you. [Beating him.] OFFICER. Good sir, be patient. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Nay, 'tis for me to be patient; I am in adversity. OFFICER. Good now, hold thy tongue. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Nay, rather persuade him to hold his hands. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Thou whoreson senseless villain! DROMIO OF EPHESUS. I would I were senseless, sir, that I might not feel your blows. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Thou art sensible in nothing but blows, and so is an ass. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. I am an ass indeed; you may prove it by my long 'ears. I have served him from the hour of my nativity to this instant, and have nothing at his hands for my service but blows: when I am cold he heats me with beating; when I am warm he cools me with beating. I am waked with it when I sleep; raised with it when I sit; driven out of doors with it when I go from home; welcomed home with it when I return: nay, I bear it on my shoulders as beggar wont her brat; and I think, when he hath lamed me, I shall beg with it from door to door. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Come, go along; my wife is coming yonder. [Enter ADRIANA, LUCIANA, and the COURTEZAN, with PINCH and others.] DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Mistress, 'respice finem,' respect your end; or rather, the prophesy, like the parrot, 'Beware the rope's-end.' ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Wilt thou still talk? [Beats him.] COURTEZAN. How say you now? is not your husband mad? ADRIANA. His incivility confirms no less. - Good Doctor Pinch, you are a conjurer; Establish him in his true sense again, And I will please you what you will demand. LUCIANA. Alas, how fiery and how sharp he looks! COURTEZAN. Mark how he trembles in his ecstasy! PINCH. Give me your hand, and let me feel your pulse. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. There is my hand, and let it feel your ear. PINCH. I charge thee, Satan, hous'd within this man, To yield possession to my holy prayers, And to thy state of darkness hie thee straight: I conjure thee by all the saints in heaven. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Peace, doting wizard, peace; I am not mad. ADRIANA. O, that thou wert not, poor distressed soul! ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. You minion, you, are these your customers? Did this companion with the saffron face Revel and feast it at my house to-day, Whilst upon me the guilty doors were shut, And I denied to enter in my house? ADRIANA. O husband, God doth know you din'd at home, Where would you had remain'd until this time, Free from these slanders and this open shame! ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. I din'd at home! Thou villain, what sayest thou? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Sir, sooth to say, you did not dine at home. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Were not my doors lock'd up and I shut out? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Perdy, your doors were lock'd and you shut out. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. And did not she herself revile me there? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Sans fable, she herself revil'd you there. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Did not her kitchen-maid rail, taunt, and scorn me? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Certes, she did: the kitchen-vestal scorn'd you. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. And did not I in rage depart from thence? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. In verity, you did; - my bones bear witness, That since have felt the vigour of his rage. ADRIANA. Is't good to soothe him in these contraries? PINCH. It is no shame; the fellow finds his vein, And, yielding to him, humours well his frenzy. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Thou hast suborn'd the goldsmith to arrest me. ADRIANA. Alas! I sent you money to redeem you, By Dromio here, who came in haste for it. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Money by me! heart and goodwill you might, But surely, master, not a rag of money. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Went'st not thou to her for purse of ducats? ADRIANA. He came to me, and I deliver'd it. LUCIANA. And I am witness with her that she did. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. God and the rope-maker, bear me witness That I was sent for nothing but a rope! PINCH. Mistress, both man and master is possess'd; I know it by their pale and deadly looks: They must be bound, and laid in some dark room. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Say, wherefore didst thou lock me forth to-day? - And why dost thou deny the bag of gold? ADRIANA. I did not, gentle husband, lock thee forth. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. And, gentle master, I receiv'd no gold; But I confess, sir, that we were lock'd out. ADRIANA. Dissembling villain, thou speak'st false in both. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Dissembling harlot, thou art false in all; And art confederate with a damned pack, To make a loathsome abject scorn of me: But with these nails I'll pluck out these false eyes That would behold in me this shameful sport. [PINCH and assistants bind ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS and DROMIO OF EPHESUS.] ADRIANA. O, bind him, bind him; let him not come near me. PINCH. More company; - the fiend is strong within him. LUCIANA. Ah me, poor man! how pale and wan he looks! ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. What, will you murder me? Thou gaoler, thou, I am thy prisoner: wilt thou suffer them To make a rescue? OFFICER. Masters, let him go: He is my prisoner, and you shall not have him. PINCH. Go, bind this man, for he is frantic too. ADRIANA. What wilt thou do, thou peevish officer? Hast thou delight to see a wretched man Do outrage and displeasure to himself? OFFICER. He is my prisoner: if I let him go, The debt he owes will be requir'd of me. ADRIANA. I will discharge thee ere I go from thee; Bear me forthwith unto his creditor, And, knowing how the debt grows, I will pay it. Good master doctor, see him safe convey'd Home to my house. - O most unhappy day! ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. O most unhappy strumpet! DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Master, I am here enter'd in bond for you. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Out on thee, villian! wherefore dost thou mad me? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Will you be bound for nothing? be mad, good master; cry, the devil. - LUCIANA. God help, poor souls, how idly do they talk! ADRIANA. Go bear him hence. - Sister, go you with me. - [Exeunt PINCH and Assistants, with ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS and DROMIO OF EPHESUS.] Say now, whose suit is he arrested at? OFFICER. One Angelo, a goldsmith; do you know him? ADRIANA. I know the man: what is the sum he owes? OFFICER. Two hundred ducats. ADRIANA. Say, how grows it due? OFFICER. Due for a chain your husband had of him. ADRIANA. He did bespeak a chain for me, but had it not. COURTEZAN. When as your husband, all in rage, to-day Came to my house, and took away my ring, - The ring I saw upon his finger now, - Straight after did I meet him with a chain. ADRIANA. It may be so, but I did never see it: Come, gaoler, bring me where the goldsmith is, I long to know the truth hereof at large. [Enter ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE, with his rapier drawn, and DROMIO OF SYRACUSE.] LUCIANA. God, for thy mercy! they are loose again. ADRIANA. And come with naked swords: let's call more help, To have them bound again. OFFICER. Away, they'll kill us. [Exeunt OFFICER, ADRIANA, and LUCIANA.] ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. I see these witches are afraid of swords. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. She that would be your wife now ran from you. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Come to the Centaur; fetch our stuff from thence: I long that we were safe and sound aboard. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Faith, stay here this night; they will surely do us no harm; you saw they speak us fair, give us gold; methinks they are such a gentle nation that, but for the mountain of mad flesh that claims marriage of me, could find in my heart to stay here still and turn witch. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. I will not stay to-night for all the town; Therefore away to get our stuff aboard. [Exeunt.] ACT V. SCENE 1. The same. [Enter MERCHANT and ANGELO.] ANGELO. I am sorry, sir, that I have hinder'd you; But I protest he had the chain of me, Though most dishonestly he doth deny it. MERCHANT. How is the man esteem'd here in the city? ANGELO. Of very reverend reputation, sir; Of credit infinite, highly belov'd, Second to none that lives here in the city: His word might bear my wealth at any time. MERCHANT. Speak softly: yonder, as I think, he walks. [Enter ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE and DROMIO OF SYRACUSE.] ANGELO. 'Tis so; and that self chain about his neck Which he forswore most monstrously to have. Good sir, draw near to me, I'll speak to him. - Signior Andpholus, I wonder much That you would put me to this shame and trouble; And, not without some scandal to yourself, With circumstance and oaths so to deny This chain, which now you wear so openly: Beside the charge, the shame, imprisonment, You have done wrong to this my honest friend; Who, but for staying on our controversy, Had hoisted sail and put to sea to-day; This chain you had of me; can you deny it? ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. I think I had: I never did deny it. MERCHANT. Yes, that you did, sir, and forswore it too. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Who heard me to deny it or forswear it? MERCHANT. These ears of mine, thou know'st, did hear thee. Fie on thee, wretch! 'tis pity that thou liv'st To walk where any honest men resort. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Thou art a villain to impeach me thus; I'll prove mine honour and mine honesty Against thee presently, if thou dar'st stand. MERCHANT. I dare, and do defy thee for a villain. [They draw.] [Enter ADRIANA, LUCIANA, COURTEZAN, and others.] ADRIANA. Hold, hurt him not, for God's sake; he is mad. Some get within him, take his sword away: Bind Dromio too, and bear them to my house. DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Run, master, run; for God's sake, take a house. This is some priory; - in, or we are spoil'd. [Exeunt ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE and DROMIO OF SYRACUSE to the priory.] [Enter the ABBESS.] ABBESS. Be quiet, people. Wherefore throng you hither? ADRIANA. To fetch my poor distracted husband hence: Let us come in, that we may bind him fast, And bear him home for his recovery. ANGELO. I knew he was not in his perfect wits. MERCHANT. I am sorry now that I did draw on him. ABBESS. How long hath this possession held the man? ADRIANA. This week he hath been heavy, sour, sad, And much different from the man he was: But till this afternoon his passion Ne'er brake into extremity of rage. ABBESS. Hath he not lost much wealth by wreck of sea? Buried some dear friend? Hath not else his eye Stray'd his affection in unlawful love? A sin prevailing much in youthful men Who give their eyes the liberty of gazing. Which of these sorrows is he subject to? ADRIANA. To none of these, except it be the last; Namely, some love that drew him oft from home. ABBESS. You should for that have reprehended him. ADRIANA. Why, so I did. ABBESS. Ay, but not rough enough. ADRIANA. As roughly as my modesty would let me. ABBESS. Haply in private. ADRIANA. And in assemblies too. ABBESS. Ay, but not enough. ADRIANA. It was the copy of our conference. In bed, he slept not for my urging it; At board, he fed not for my urging it; Alone, it was the subject of my theme; In company, I often glanced it; Still did I tell him it was vile and bad. ABBESS. And thereof came it that the man was mad: The venom clamours of a jealous woman Poisons more deadly than a mad dog's tooth. It seems his sleeps were hindered by thy railing: And thereof comes it that his head is light. Thou say'st his meat was sauc'd with thy upbraidings: Unquiet meals make ill digestions; Thereof the raging fire of fever bred; And what's a fever but a fit of madness? Thou say'st his sports were hinder'd by thy brawls: Sweet recreation barr'd, what doth ensue But moody and dull melancholy, - Kinsman to grim and comfortless despair, - And, at her heels, a huge infectious troop Of pale distemperatures and foes to life? In food, in sport, and life-preserving rest, To be disturb'd would mad or man or beast: The consequence is, then, thy jealous fits Hath scar'd thy husband from the use of's wits. LUCIANA. She never reprehended him but mildly, When he demean'd himself rough, rude, and wildly. - Why bear you these rebukes, and answer not? ADRIANA. She did betray me to my own reproof. - Good people, enter, and lay hold on him. ABBESS. No, not a creature enters in my house. ADRIANA. Then let your servants bring my husband forth. ABBESS. Neither: he took this place for sanctuary, And it shall privilege him from your hands Till I have brought him to his wits again, Or lose my labour in assaying it. ADRIANA. I will attend my husband, be his nurse, Diet his sickness, for it is my office, And will have no attorney but myself; And therefore let me have him home with me. ABBESS. Be patient; for I will not let him stir Till I have used the approved means I have, With wholesome syrups, drugs, and holy prayers, To make of him a formal man again: It is a branch and parcel of mine oath, A charitable duty of my order; Therefore depart, and leave him here with me. ADRIANA. I will not hence and leave my husband here; And ill it doth beseem your holiness To separate the husband and the wife. ABBESS. Be quiet, and depart: thou shalt not have him. [Exit ABBESS.] LUCIANA. Complain unto the duke of this indignity. ADRIANA. Come, go; I will fall prostrate at his feet, And never rise until my tears and prayers Have won his grace to come in person hither And take perforce my husband from the abbess. MERCHANT. By this, I think, the dial points at five: Anon, I'm sure, the duke himself in person Comes this way to the melancholy vale; The place of death and sorry execution, Behind the ditches of the abbey here. ANGELO. Upon what cause? MERCHANT. To see a reverend Syracusian merchant, Who put unluckily into this bay Against the laws and statutes of this town, Beheaded publicly for his offence. ANGELO. See where they come: we will behold his death. LUCIANA. Kneel to the duke before he pass the abbey. [Enter the DUKE, attended; AEGEON, bareheaded; with the HEADSMAN and other OFFICERS.] DUKE. Yet once again proclaim it publicly, If any friend will pay the sum for him, He shall not die; so much we tender him. ADRIANA. Justice, most sacred duke, against the abbess! DUKE. She is a virtuous and a reverend lady; It cannot be that she hath done thee wrong. ADRIANA. May it please your grace, Antipholus, my husband, - Who I made lord of me and all I had, At your important letters, - this ill day A most outrageous fit of madness took him; That desp'rately he hurried through the street, - With him his bondman all as mad as he, - Doing displeasure to the citizens By rushing in their houses, bearing thence Rings, jewels, anything his rage did like. Once did I get him bound and sent him home, Whilst to take order for the wrongs I went, That here and there his fury had committed. Anon, I wot not by what strong escape, He broke from those that had the guard of him; And, with his mad attendant and himself, Each one with ireful passion, with drawn swords, Met us again, and, madly bent on us, Chased us away; till, raising of more aid, We came again to bind them: then they fled Into this abbey, whither we pursued them: And here the abbess shuts the gates on us, And will not suffer us to fetch him out, Nor send him forth that we may bear him hence. Therefore, most gracious duke, with thy command Let him be brought forth and borne hence for help. DUKE. Long since thy husband serv'd me in my wars; And I to thee engag'd a prince's word, When thou didst make him master of thy bed, To do him all the grace and good I could. - Go, some of you, knock at the abbey-gate, And bid the lady abbess come to me: I will determine this before I stir. [Enter a SERVANT.] SERVANT. O mistress, mistress, shift and save yourself! My master and his man are both broke loose, Beaten the maids a-row, and bound the doctor; Whose beard they have singed off with brands of fire; And ever as it blazed they threw on him Great pails of puddled mire to quench the hair: My master preaches patience to him, while His man with scissors nicks him like a fool: And, sure, unless you send some present help, Between them they will kill the conjurer. ADRIANA. Peace, fool, thy master and his man are here; And that is false thou dost report to us. SERVANT. Mistress, upon my life, I tell you true: I have not breath'd almost since I did see it. He cries for you, and vows, if he can take you, To scorch your face, and to disfigure you: [Cry within.] Hark, hark, I hear him, mistress; fly, be gone! DUKE. Come, stand by me; fear nothing. Guard with halberds. ADRIANA. Ah me, it is my husband! Witness you That he is borne about invisible. Even now we hous'd him in the abbey here, And now he's there, past thought of human reason. [Enter ANTIPHOLUS and DROMIO OF EPHESUS.] ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Justice, most gracious duke; oh, grant me justice! Even for the service that long since I did thee, When I bestrid thee in the wars, and took Deep scars to save thy life; even for the blood That then I lost for thee, now grant me justice. AEGEON. Unless the fear of death doth make me dote, I see my son Antipholus, and Dromio. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Justice, sweet prince, against that woman there. She whom thou gav'st to me to be my wife; That hath abused and dishonour'd me Even in the strength and height of injury! Beyond imagination is the wrong That she this day hath shameless thrown on me. DUKE. Discover how, and thou shalt find me just. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. This day, great duke, she shut the doors upon me, While she with harlots feasted in my house. DUKE. A grievous fault. Say, woman, didst thou so? ADRIANA. No, my good lord; - myself, he, and my sister, To-day did dine together. So befall my soul As this is false he burdens me withal! LUCIANA. Ne'er may I look on day nor sleep on night But she tells to your highness simple truth! ANGELO. O peflur'd woman! they are both forsworn. In this the madman justly chargeth them. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. My liege, I am advised what I say; Neither disturb'd with the effect of wine, Nor, heady-rash, provok'd with raging ire, Albeit my wrongs might make one wiser mad. This woman lock'd me out this day from dinner: That goldsmith there, were he not pack'd with her, Could witness it, for he was with me then; Who parted with me to go fetch a chain. Promising to bring it to the Porcupine, Where Balthazar and I did dine together. Our dinner done, and he not coming thither, I went to seek him. In the street I met him, And in his company that gentleman. There did this perjur'd goldsmith swear me down, That I this day of him receiv'd the chain, Which, God he knows, I saw not: for the which He did arrest me with an officer. I did obey, and sent my peasant home For certain ducats: he with none return'd. Then fairly I bespoke the officer To go in person with me to my house. By the way we met My wife, her sister, and a rabble more Of vile confederates: along with them They brought one Pinch; a hungry lean-faced villain, A mere anatomy, a mountebank, A threadbare juggler, and a fortune-teller; A needy, hollow-ey'd, sharp-looking wretch; A living dead man; this pernicious slave, Forsooth, took on him as a conjurer; And gazing in mine eyes, feeling my pulse, And with no face, as 'twere, outfacing me, Cries out, I was possess'd: then altogether They fell upon me, bound me, bore me thence; And in a dark and dankish vault at home There left me and my man, both bound together; Till, gnawing with my teeth my bonds in sunder, I gain'd my freedom, and immediately Ran hither to your grace; whom I beseech To give me ample satisfaction For these deep shames and great indignities. ANGELO. My lord, in truth, thus far I witness with him, That he din'd not at home, but was lock'd out. DUKE. But had he such a chain of thee, or no? ANGELO. He had, my lord: and when he ran in here These people saw the chain about his neck. MERCHANT. Besides, I will be sworn these ears of mine Heard you confess you had the chain of him, After you first forswore it on the mart, And thereupon I drew my sword on you; And then you fled into this abbey here, From whence, I think, you are come by miracle. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. I never came within these abbey walls, Nor ever didst thou draw thy sword on me: I never saw the chain, so help me heaven! And this is false you burden me withal. DUKE. What an intricate impeach is this! I think you all have drunk of Circe's cup. If here you hous'd him, here he would have been: If he were mad, he would not plead so coldly: - You say he din'd at home: the goldsmith here Denies that saying: - Sirrah, what say you? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Sir, he dined with her there, at the Porcupine. COURTEZAN. He did; and from my finger snatch'd that ring. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. 'Tis true, my liege; this ring I had of her. DUKE. Saw'st thou him enter at the abbey here? COURTEZAN. As sure, my liege, as I do see your grace. DUKE. Why, this is strange: - Go call the abbess hither: I think you are all mated, or stark mad. [Exit an Attendant.] AEGEON. Most mighty Duke, vouchsafe me speak a word; Haply, I see a friend will save my life And pay the sum that may deliver me. DUKE. Speak freely, Syracusian, what thou wilt. AEGEON. Is not your name, sir, call'd Antipholus? And is not that your bondman Dromio? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Within this hour I was his bondman, sir, But he, I thank him, gnaw'd in two my cords: Now am I Dromio and his man unbound. AEGEON. I am sure you both of you remember me. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Ourselves we do remember, sir, by you; For lately we were bound as you are now. You are not Pinch's patient, are you, sir? AEGEON. Why look you strange on me? you know me well. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. I never saw you in my life, till now. AEGEON. Oh! grief hath chang'd me since you saw me last; And careful hours with Time's deformed hand, Have written strange defeatures in my face: But tell me yet, dost thou not know my voice? ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Neither. AEGEON. Dromio, nor thou? DROMIO OF EPHESUS. No, trust me, sir, nor I. AEGEON. I am sure thou dost. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Ay, sir, but I am sure I do not; and whatsoever a man denies, you are now bound to believe him. AEGEON. Not know my voice! O time's extremity! Hast thou so crack'd and splitted my poor tongue, In seven short years that here my only son Knows not my feeble key of untun'd cares? Though now this grained face of mine be hid In sap-consuming winter's drizzled snow, And all the conduits of my blood froze up, Yet hath my night of life some memory, My wasting lamps some fading glimmer left, My dull deaf ears a little use to hear: All these old witnesses, - I cannot err, - Tell me thou art my son Antipholus. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. I never saw my father in my life. AEGEON. But seven years since, in Syracusa, boy, Thou know'st we parted; but perhaps, my son, Thou sham'st to acknowledge me in misery. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. The duke and all that know me in the city, Can witness with me that it is not so: I ne'er saw Syracusa in my life. DUKE. I tell thee, Syracusan, twenty years Have I been patron to Antipholus, During which time he ne'er saw Syracusa: I see thy age and dangers make thee dote. [Enter the ABBESS, with ANTIPHOLUS SYRACUSAN and DROMIO SYRACUSAN.] ABBESS. Most mighty duke, behold a man much wrong'd. [All gather to see them.] ADRIANA. I see two husbands, or mine eyes deceive me. DUKE. One of these men is genius to the other; And so of these. Which is the natural man, And which the spirit? Who deciphers them? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. I, sir, am Dromio; command him away. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. I, sir, am Dromio; pray let me stay. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. Aegeon, art thou not? or else his ghost? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. O, my old master! who hath bound him here? ABBESS. Whoever bound him, I will loose his bonds, And gain a husband by his liberty. - Speak, old Aegeon, if thou be'st the man That hadst a wife once called Aemilia, That bore thee at a burden two fair sons: O, if thou be'st the same Aegeon, speak, And speak unto the same Aemilia! AEGEON. If I dream not, thou art Aemilia: If thou art she, tell me where is that son That floated with thee on the fatal raft? ABBESS. By men of Epidamnum, he and I, And the twin Dromio, all were taken up: But, by and by, rude fishermen of Corinth By force took Dromio and my son from them, And me they left with those of Epidamnum: What then became of them I cannot tell; I to this fortune that you see me in. DUKE. Why, here begins his morning story right: These two Antipholus', these two so like, And these two Dromios, one in semblance, - Besides her urging of her wreck at sea, - These are the parents to these children, Which accidentally are met together. Antipholus, thou cam'st from Corinth first? ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. No, sir, not I; I came from Syracuse. DUKE. Stay, stand apart; I know not which is which. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. I came from Corinth, my most gracious lord. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. And I with him. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Brought to this town by that most famous warrior, Duke Menaphon, your most renowned uncle. ADRIANA. Which of you two did dine with me to-day? ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. I, gentle mistress. ADRIANA. And are not you my husband? ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. No; I say nay to that. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. And so do I, yet did she call me so; And this fair gentlewoman, her sister here, Did call me brother. - What I told you then, I hope I shall have leisure to make good; If this be not a dream I see and hear. ANGELO. That is the chain, sir, which you had of me. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. I think it be, sir; I deny it not. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. And you, sir, for this chain arrested me. ANGELO. I think I did, sir: I deny it not. ADRIANA. I sent you money, sir, to be your bail, By Dromio; but I think he brought it not. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. No, none by me. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. This purse of ducats I receiv'd from you, And Dromio my man did bring them me: I see we still did meet each other's man, And I was ta'en for him, and he for me, And thereupon these errors are arose. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. These ducats pawn I for my father here. DUKE. It shall not need; thy father hath his life. COURTEZAN. Sir, I must have that diamond from you. ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. There, take it; and much thanks for my good cheer. ABBESS. Renowned duke, vouchsafe to take the pains To go with us into the abbey here, And hear at large discoursed all our fortunes: - And all that are assembled in this place, That by this sympathized one day's error Have suffer'd wrong, go, keep us company, And we shall make full satisfaction - Twenty-five years have I but gone in travail Of you, my sons; nor till this present hour My heavy burdens are delivered: - The duke, my husband, and my children both, And you the calendars of their nativity, Go to a gossips' feast, and go with me; After so long grief, such nativity! DUKE. With all my heart, I'll gossip at this feast. [Exeunt DUKE, ABBESS, AEGEON, Courtezan, Merchant, ANGELO, and Attendants.] DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Master, shall I fetch your stuff from shipboard? ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS. Dromio, what stuff of mine hast thou embark'd? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Your goods that lay at host, sir, in the Centaur. ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE. He speaks to me; I am your master, Dromio: Come, go with us: we'll look to that anon: Embrace thy brother there; rejoice with him. [Exeunt ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE and ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS, ADRIANA, and LUCIANA.] DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. There is a fat friend at your master's house, That kitchen'd me for you to-day at dinner: She now shall be my sister, not my wife. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Methinks you are my glass, and not my brother: I see by you I am a sweet-faced youth. Will you walk in to see their gossiping? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. Not I, sir; you are my elder. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. That's a question; how shall we try it? DROMIO OF SYRACUSE. We'll draw cuts for the senior: till then, lead thou first. DROMIO OF EPHESUS. Nay, then, thus: We came into the world like brother and brother: And now let's go hand in hand, not one before another. [The End.] Publication Date: May 29th 2008 https://www.bookrix.com/-bx.shakespeare
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-asuna-yuuki-sao-the-return-of-kirito/
Asuna Yuuki, RWBY lover Sao The Return Of Kirito kagari" kirito"ashley"sasuke" The Return Of A Hero "The last time i was in this world it finished before i could reach the top floor, but now thats going to change because im going to finish all 100 floors with a little help from afew freinds.", kirito said to himself with a smile, as asuna walked up behind kirito .hey kirito" asuna was her usual self as she then smiled at him"oh h..hi asuna" kirito smiled at her and then looked up at the beautiful colored sky grabbing ahold of her hand "lets go asuna its time to meet with the others" he'd say as he turned around, he saw everybody behind them "Hey kirito what,s up man" klein said with a smirk on his face."oh well nothing really"me and asuna were just about to go look for you guys and were getting ready to pass all of the 100 floors he said then pointing" we need your help" well of course we can help! "salica said folding her arms" yeah what are we waiting for ? Lisbeth grabbed ahold of salicas hand and began to run" as kirito then shouted" your going the wrong way!" asuna let out a sigh then beginning to walk with kirito"klein "salica" elisabeth" and the others"they were told to stay close" but before they knew it fog sorrounded them" Asuna! " salica"! klein " elisbeth!? "kirito said as the fog sorrounded looking around quickly but carefully he watched for movement then hearing a scream" which was asuna,s" asuna got hit by something" and it wasnt just a normal something" asuna turned around to see giant wings" as her eyes then widen she yelled" everyone run ! weve got to get out of the fog! "the dragons spikey tail hit her" quickly standing she ran down the big hill not sure of where everyone was salica kept hold of elisbeth as she was also hit by something elisbeth picked her up and started to run with her in her arms" they looked for kirito but there was no sight of him and soon the fog cleared up as kirito was running down hill with asuna in his arms he'd put her down and run back to the dragon and pulled his sword out as he thrusts his sword at the dragon  it stuns him but the drgons health was to high so kirito pulled out his twin blade and attack the dragon at fierce speed as he yells " klein and asuna strike it from the behind" They do as instucted and it kills the dragon kirito gets the end bonus for dealing the most damage as he sees its the midnight cape and he levels up to 15 he'd think to him self wondering "how stong was that dragon" he  said wondering "huh weird that must have been a very high leveled dragon well good job on finishing the first floor you guys" .   The Start Of A New Floor! Kirito and the gang are back again to try and beat all 100 floors"so  stay tuned for the next book that will have 2 or 3 chapters  and afew other charcters may join us soon "To Be Continued" Publication Date: October 8th 2013 https://www.bookrix.com/-narutolover11
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-ariel-hunter-middle-school/
Ariel Hunter Middle School to Byram Middle School ! Cayla Donaldson,Karrington Turner &Ericka Edwards! Publication Date: November 11th 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-arieljane576
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-friedrich-schiller-love-and-intrigue/
Friedrich Schiller Love and Intrigue PRESIDENT VON WALTER, Prime Minister in the Court of a German Prince. FERDINAND, his son; a Major in the Army; in love with Louisa Miller. BARON VON KALB, Court Marshal (or Chamberlain). WORM, Private Secretary to the President. MILLER, the Town Musician, and Teacher of Music. MRS. MILLER, his wife. LOUISA, the daughter of Miller, in love with Ferdinand. LADY MILFORD, the Prince's Mistress. SOPHY, attendant on Lady Milford. An old Valet in the service of the Prince. Officers, Attendants, etc. ACT I. SCENE I. MILLER MRS. MILLER. MILLER (walking quickly up and down the room). Once for all! The affair is becoming serious. My daughter and the baron will soon be the town-talk my house lose its character the president will get wind of it, and the short and long of the matter is, I'll show the younker the door. MRS MILLER. You did not entice him to your house did not thrust your daughter upon him! MILLER. Didn't entice him to my house didn't thrust the girl upon him! Who'll believe me? I was master of my own house. I ought to have taken more care of my daughter. I should have bundled the major out at once, or have gone straight to his excellency, his papa, and disclosed all. The young baron will get off merely with a snubbing, I know that well enough, and all the blame will fall upon the fiddler. MRS MILLER (sipping her coffee). Pooh! nonsense! How can it fall upon you? What have people to do with you? You follow your profession, and pick up pupils wherever you can find them. MILLER. All very fine, but please to tell me what will be the upshot of the whole affair? He can't marry the girl marriage is out of the question, and to make her his God help us! "Good-by t'ye!" No, no when such a sprig of nobility has been nibbling here and there and everywhere, and has glutted himself with the devil knows what all, of course it will be a relish to my young gentleman to get a mouthful of sweet water. Take heed! Take heed! If you were dotted with eyes, and could place a sentinel for every hair of your head, he'll bamboozle her under your very nose; add one to her reckoning, take himself off, and the girl's ruined for life, left in the lurch, or, having once tasted the trade, will carry it on. (Striking his forehead.) Oh, horrible thought! MRS MILLER. God in his mercy protect us! MILLER. We shall want his protection. You may well say that. What other object can such a scapegrace have? The girl is handsome well made can show a pretty foot. How the upper story is furnished matters little. That's blinked in you women if nature has not played the niggard in other respects. Let this harum-scarum but turn over this chapter ho! ho! his eyes will glisten like Rodney's when he got scent of a French frigate; then up with all sail and at her, and I don't blame him for it flesh is flesh. I know that very well. MRS MILLER. You should only read the beautiful billy-doux which the baron writes to your daughter. Gracious me! Why it's as clear as the sun at noonday that he loves her purely for her virtuous soul. MILLER. That's the right strain! We beat the sack, but mean the ass's back. He who wishes to pay his respects to the flesh needs only a kind heart for a go-between. What did I myself? When we've once so far cleared the ground that the affections cry ready! slap! the bodies follow their example, the appetites are obedient, and the silver moon kindly plays the pimp. MRS MILLER. And then only think of the beautiful books that the major has sent us. Your daughter always prays out of them. MILLER (whistles). Prays! You've hit the mark. The plain, simple food of nature is much too raw and indigestible for this maccaroni gentleman's stomach. It must be cooked for him artificially in the infernal pestilential pitcher of your novel-writers. Into the fire with the rubbish! I shall have the girl taking up with God knows what all about heavenly fooleries that will get into her blood, like Spanish flies, and scatter to the winds the handful of Christianity that cost her father so much trouble to keep together. Into the fire with them I say! The girl will take the devil's own nonsense into her head; amidst the dreams of her fool's paradise she'll not know her own home, but forget and feel ashamed of her father, the music-master; and, lastly, I shall lose a worthy, honest son-in-law who might have nestled himself so snugly into my connections. No! damn it! (Jumps up in a passion.) I'll break the neck of it at once, and the major yes, yes, the major! shall be shown where the carpenter made the door. (Going.) MRS MILLER. Be civil, Miller! How many a bright shilling have his presents MILLER (comes back, and goes up to her). The blood money of my daughter? To Beelzebub with thee, thou infamous bawd! Sooner will I vagabondize with my violin and fiddle for a bit of bread sooner will I break to pieces my instrument and carry dung on the sounding-board than taste a mouthful earned by my only child at the price of her soul and future happiness. Give up your cursed coffee and snuff-taking, and there will be no need to carry your daughter's face to market. I have always had my bellyful and a good shirt to my back before this confounded scamp put his nose into my crib. MRS MILLER. Now don't be so ready to pitch the house out of window. How you flare up all of a sudden. I only meant to say that we shouldn't offend the major, because he is the son of the president. MILLER. There lies the root of the mischief. For that reason for that very reason the thing must be put a stop to this very day! The president, if he is a just and upright father, will give me his thanks. You must brush up my red plush, and I will go straight to his excellency. I shall say to him, "Your excellency's son has an eye to my daughter; my daughter is not good enough to be your excellency's son's wife, but too good to be your excellency's son's strumpet, and there's an end of the matter. My name is Miller." SCENE II. Enter SECRETARY WORM. MRS MILLER. Ah! Good morning, Mr. Seckertary! Have we indeed the pleasure of seeing you again? WORM. All on my side on my side, cousin Miller! Where a high-born cavalier's visits are received mine can be of no account whatever. MRS MILLER. How can you think so, Mr. Seckertary? His lordship the baron, Major Ferdinand, certainly does us the honor to look in now and then; but, for all that, we don't undervalue others. MILLER (vexed). A chair, wife, for the gentleman! Be seated, kinsman. WORM (lays aside hat and stick, and seats himself). Well, well and how then is my future or past bride? I hope she'll not be may I not have the honor of seeing Miss Louisa? MRS MILLER. Thanks for inquiries, Mr. Seckertary, but my daughter is not at all proud. MILLER (angry, jogs her with his elbow). Woman! MRS MILLER. Sorry she can't have that honor, Mr. Seckertary. My daughter is now at mass. WORM. I am glad to hear it, glad to hear it. I shall have in her a pious, Christian wife! MRS MILLER (smiling in a stupidly affected manner). Yes but, Mr. Seckertary MILLER (greatly incensed, pulls her ears). Woman! MRS MILLER. If our family can serve you in any other way with the greatest pleasure, Mr. Seckertary WORM (frowning angrily). In any other way? Much obliged! much obliged! hm! hm! hm! MRS MILLER. But, as you yourself must see, Mr. Seckertary MILLER (in a rage, shaking his fist at her). Woman! MRS MILLER. Good is good, and better is better, and one does not like to stand between fortune and one's only child (with vulgar pride). You understand me, Mr. Seckertary? WORM. Understand. Not exac -. Oh, yes. But what do you really mean? MRS MILLER. Why why I only think I mean (coughs). Since then Providence has determined to make a great lady of my daughter WORM (jumping from his chair). What's that you say? what? MILLER. Keep your seat, keep your seat, Mr. Secretary! The woman's an out-and-out fool! Where's the great lady to come from? How you show your donkey's ears by talking such stuff. MRS MILLER. Scold as long as you will. I know what I know, and what the major said he said. MILLER (snatches up his fiddle in anger). Will you hold your tongue? Shall I throw my fiddle at your head? What can you know? What can he have said? Take no notice of her clack, kinsman! Away with you to your kitchen! You'll not think me first cousin of a fool, and that I'm looking out so high for the girl? You'll not think that of me, Mr. Secretary? WORM. Nor have I deserved it of you, Mr. Miller! You have always shown yourself a man of your word, and my contract to your daughter was as good as signed. I hold an office that will maintain a thrifty manager; the president befriends me; the door to advancement is open to me whenever I may choose to take advantage of it. You see that my intentions towards Miss Louisa are serious; if you have been won over by a fop of rank MRS MILLER. Mr. Seckertary! more respect, I beg MILLER. Hold your tongue, I say. Never mind her, kinsman. Things remain as they were. The answer I gave you last harvest, I repeat to-day. I'll not force my daughter. If you suit her, well and good; then it's for her to see that she can be happy with you. If she shakes her head still better be it so, I should say then you must be content to pocket the refusal, and part in good fellowship over a bottle with her father. 'Tis the girl who is to live with you not I. Why should I, out of sheer caprice, fasten a husband upon the girl for whom she has no inclination? That the evil one may haunt me down like a wild beast in my old age that in every drop I drink in every bit of bread I bite, I might swallow the bitter reproach: Thou art the villain who destroyed his child's happiness! MRS MILLER. The short and the long of it is I refuse my consent downright; my daughter's intended for a lofty station, and I'll go to law if my husband is going to be talked over. MILLER. Shall I break every bone in your body, you millclack? WORM (to MILLER). Paternal advice goes a great way with the daughter, and I hope you know me, Mr. Miller? MILLER. Plague take you! 'Tis the girl must know you. What an old crabstick like me can see in you is just the very last thing that a dainty young girl wants. I'll tell you to a hair if you're the man for an orchestra but a woman's heart is far too deep for a music-master. And then, to be frank with you you know that I'm a blunt, straightforward fellow you'll not give thank'ye for my advice. I'll persuade my daughter to no one but from you Mr. Sec I would dissuade her! A lover who calls upon the father for help with permission is not worth a pinch of snuff. If he has anything in him, he'll be ashamed to take that old-fashioned way of making his deserts known to his sweetheart. If he hasn't the courage, why he's a milksop, and no Louisas were born for the like of him. No! he must carry on his commerce with the daughter behind the father's back. He must manage so to win her heart, that she would rather wish both father and mother at Old Harry than give him up or that she come herself, fall at her father's feet, and implore either for death on the rack, or the only one of her heart. That's the fellow for me! that I call love! and he who can't bring matters to that pitch with a petticoat may stick the goose feather in his cap. WORM (seizes hat and stick and hurries out of the room). Much obliged, Mr. Miller! MILLER (going after him slowly). For what? for what? You haven't taken anything, Mr. Secretary! (Comes back.) He won't hear, and off he's gone. The very sight of that quill-driver is like poison and brimstone to me. An ugly, contraband knave, smuggled into the world by some lewd prank of the devil with his malicious little pig's eyes, foxy hair, and nut-cracker chin, just as if Nature, enraged at such a bungled piece of goods, had seized the ugly monster by it, and flung him aside. No! rather than throw away my daughter on a vagabond like him, she may God forgive me! MRS MILLER. The wretch! but you'll be made to keep a clean tongue in your head! MILLER. Ay, and you too, with your pestilential baron you, too, must put my bristles up. You're never more stupid than when you have the most occasion to show a little sense. What's the meaning of all that trash about your daughter being a great lady? If it's to be cried out about the town to-morrow, you need only let that fellow get scent of it. He is one of your worthies who go sniffing about into people's houses, dispute upon everything, and, if a slip of the tongue happen to you, skurry with it straight to the prince, mistress, and minister, and then there's the devil to pay. SCENE III. Enter LOUISA with a book in her hand. LOUISA. Good morning, dear father! MILLER (affectionately). Bless thee, my Louisa! I rejoice to see thy thoughts are turned so diligently to thy Creator. Continue so, and his arm will support thee. LOUISA. Oh! I am a great sinner, father! Was he not here, mother? MRS MILLER. Who, my child? LOUISA. Ah! I forgot that there are others in the world besides him my head wanders so. Was he not here? Ferdinand? MILLER (with melancholy, serious voice). I thought my Louisa had forgotten that name in her devotions? LOUISA (after looking at him steadfastly for some time). I understand you, father. I feel the knife which stabs my conscience; but it comes too late. I can no longer pray, father. Heaven and Ferdinand divide my bleeding soul, and I fear I fear (after a pause). Yet no, no, good father. The painter is best praised when we forget him in the contemplation of his picture. When in the contemplation of his masterpiece, my delight makes me forget the Creator, is not that, father, the true praise of God? MILLER (throws himself in displeasure on a chair). There we have it! Those are the fruits of your ungodly reading. LOUISA (uneasy, goes to the window). Where can he be now? Ah! the high-born ladies who see him listen to him I am a poor forgotten maiden. (Startles at that word, and rushes to her father.) But no, no! forgive me. I do not repine at my lot. I ask but little to think on him that can harm no one. Ah! that I might breathe out this little spark of life in one soft fondling zephyr to cool his check! That this fragile floweret, youth, were a violet, on which he might tread, and I die modestly beneath his feet! I ask no more, father! Can the proud, majestic day-star punish the gnat for basking in its rays? MILLER (deeply affected, leans on the arm of his chair, and covers his face). My child, my child, with joy would I sacrifice the remnant of my days hadst thou never seen the major. LOUISA (terrified.) How; how? What did you say? No, no! that could not be your meaning, good father. You know not that Ferdinand is mine! You know not that God created him for me, and for my delight alone! (After a pause of recollection.) The first moment that I beheld him and the blood rushed into my glowing cheeks every pulse beat with joy; every throb told me, every breath whispered, "'Tis he!" And my heart, recognizing the long-desired one, repeated "'Tis he!" And the whole world was as one melodious echo of my delight! Then oh! then was the first dawning of my soul! A thousand new sentiments arose in my bosom, as flowers arise from the earth when spring approaches. I forgot there was a world, yet never had I felt that world so dear to me! I forgot there was a God, yet never had I so loved him! MILLER (runs to her and clasps her to his bosom). Louisa! my beloved, my admirable child! Do what thou wilt. Take all all my life the baron God is my witness him I can never give thee! [Exit. LOUISA. Nor would I have him now, father! Time on earth is but a stinted dewdrop in the ocean of eternity. 'Twill swiftly glide in one delicious dream of Ferdinand. I renounce him for this life! But then, mother then when the bounds of separation are removed when the hated distinctions of rank no longer part us when men will be only men I shall bring nothing with me save my innocence! Yet often has my father told me that at the Almighty's coming riches and titles will be worthless; and that hearts alone will be beyond all price. Oh! then shall I be rich! There, tears will be reckoned for triumphs, and purity of soul be preferred to an illustrious ancestry. Then, then, mother, shall I be noble! In what will he then be superior to the girl of his heart? MRS. MILLER (starts from her seat). Louisa! the baron! He is jumping over the fence! Where shall I hide myself? LOUISA (begins to tremble). Oh! do not leave me, mother! MRS MILLER. Mercy! What a figure I am. I am quite ashamed! I cannot let his lordship see me in this state! [Exit. SCENE IV. LOUISA FERDINAND. (He flies towards her she falls back into her chair, pale and trembling. He remains standing before her they look at each other for some moments in silence. A pause.) FERDINAND. So pale, Louisa? LOUISA (rising, and embracing him). It is nothing nothing now that you are here it is over. FERDINAND (takes her hand and raises it to his lips). And does my Louisa still love me? My heart is yesterday's; is thine the same? I flew hither to see if thou wert happy, that I might return and be so too. But I find thee whelmed in sorrow! LOUISA. Not so, my beloved, not so! FERDINAND. Confess, Louisa! you are not happy. I see through your soul as clearly as through the transparent lustre of this brilliant. No spot can harbor here unmarked by me no thought can cloud your brow that does not reach your lover's heart. Whence comes this grief? Tell me, I beseech you! Ah! could I feel assured this mirror still remained unsullied, there'd seem to me no cloud in all the universe! Tell me, dear Louisa, what afflicts you? LOUISA (looking at him with anxiety for a few moments). Ferdinand! couldst thou but know how such discourse exalts the tradesman's daughter FERDINAND (surprised). What say'st thou? Tell me, girl! how camest thou by that thought? Thou art my Louisa! who told thee thou couldst be aught else? See, false one, see, for what coldness I must chide thee! Were indeed thy whole soul absorbed by love for me, never hadst thou found time to draw comparisons! When I am with thee, my prudence is lost in one look from thine eyes: when I am absent in a dream of thee! But thou thou canst harbor prudence in the sane breast with love! Fie on thee! Every moment bestowed on this sorrow was a robbery from affection and from me! LOUISA (pressing his hand and shaking her head with a melancholy air). Ferdinand, you would lull my apprehensions to sleep; you would divert my eyes from the precipice into which I am falling. I can see the future! The voice of honor your prospects, your father's anger my nothingness. (Shuddering and suddenly drops his hands.) Ferdinand! a sword hangs over us! They would separate us! FERDINAND (jumps up). Separate us! Whence these apprehensions, Louisa? Who can rend the bonds that bind two hearts, or separate the tones of one accord? True, I am a nobleman but show me that my patent of nobility is older than the eternal laws of the universe or my escutcheon more valid than the handwriting of heaven in my Louisa's eyes? "This woman is for this man?" I am son of the prime minister. For that very reason, what but love can soften the curses which my father's extortions from the country will entail upon me? LOUISA. Oh! how I fear that father! FERDINAND. I fear nothing nothing but that your affection should know bounds. Let obstacles rise between us, huge as mountains, I will look upon them as a ladder by which to fly into the arms of my Louisa! The tempest of opposing fate shall but fan the flame of my affection dangers will only serve to make Louisa yet more charming. Then speak no more of terrors, my love! I myself I will watch over thee carefully as the enchanter's dragon watches over buried gold. Trust thyself to me! thou shalt need no other angel. I will throw myself between thee and fate for thee receive each wound. For thee will I catch each drop distilled from the cup of joy, and bring thee in the bowl of love. (Embracing affectionately.) This arm shall support my Louisa through life. Fairer than it dismissed thee, shall heaven receive thee back, and confess with delight that love alone can give perfection to the soul. LOUISA (disengaging herself from him, greatly agitated). No more! I beseech thee, Ferdinand! no more! Couldst thou know. Oh! leave me, leave me! Little dost thou feel how these hopes rend my heart in pieces like fiends! (Going.) FERDINAND (detaining her). Stay, Louisa! stay! Why this agitation? Why those anxious looks? LOUISA. I had forgotten these dreams, and was happy. Now now from this day is the tranquillity of my heart no more. Wild impetuous wishes will torment my bosom! Go! God forgive thee! Thou hast hurled a firebrand into my young peaceful heart which nothing can extinguish! (She breaks from him, and rushes from the apartment, followed by FERDINAND.) SCENE V. A Chamber in the PRESIDENT.'S House. The PRESIDENT, with the grand order of the cross about his neck, and a star at his breast SECRETARY WORM. PRESIDENT. A serious attachment, say you? No, no, Worm; that I never can believe. WORM. If your excellency pleases, I will bring proofs of my assertions. PRESIDENT. That he has a fancy for the wench flatters her and, if you will, pretends to love her all this is very possible nay excusable but and the daughter of a musician, you say? WORM. Of Miller, the music-master. PRESIDENT. Handsome? But that, of course. WORM (with warmth). A most captivating and lovely blondine, who, without saying too much, might figure advantageously beside the greatest beauties of the court. PRESIDENT (laughs). It's very plain, Worm, that you have an eye upon the jade yourself I see that. But listen, Worm. That my son has a passion for the fair sex gives me hope that he will find favor with the ladies. He may make his way at court. The girl is handsome, you say; I am glad to think my son has taste. Can he deceive the silly wench by holding out honorable intentions still better; it will show that he is shrewd enough to play the hypocrite when it serves his purpose. He may become prime minister if he accomplishes his purpose! Admirable! that will prove to me that fortune favors him. Should the farce end with a chubby grandchild incomparable! I will drink an extra bottle of Malaga to the prospects of my pedigree, and cheerfully pay the wench's lying-in expenses. WORM. All I wish is that your excellency may not have to drink that bottle to drown your sorrow. PRESIDENT (sternly). Worm! remember that what I once believe, I believe obstinately that I am furious when angered. I am willing to pass over as a joke this attempt to stir my blood. That you are desirous of getting rid of your rival, I can very well comprehend, and that, because you might have some difficulty in supplanting the son, you endeavor to make a cat's-paw of the father, I can also understand I am even delighted to find that you are master of such excellent qualifications in the way of roguery. Only, friend Worm, pray don't make me, too, the butt of your knavery. Understand me, have a care that your cunning trench not upon my plans! WORM. Pardon me, your excellency! If even as you suspect jealousy is concerned, it is only with the eye, and not with the tongue. PRESIDENT. It would be better to dispense with it altogether. What can it matter to you, simpleton, whether you get your coin fresh from the mint, or it comes through a banker? Console yourself with the example of our nobility. Whether known to the bridegroom or not, I can assure you that, amongst us of rank, scarcely a marriage takes place but what at least half a dozen of the guests or the footmen can state the geometrical area of the bridegroom's paradise. WORM (bowing). My lord! Upon this head I confess myself a plebeian. PRESIDENT. And, besides, you may soon have the satisfaction of turning the laugh most handsomely against your rival. At this very moment it is under consideration in the cabinet, that, upon the arrival of the new duchess, Lady Milford shall apparently be discarded, and, to complete the deception, form an alliance. You know, Worm, how greatly my influence depends upon this lady how my mightiest prospects hang upon the passions of the prince. The duke is now seeking a partner for Lady Milford. Some one else may step in conclude the bargain for her ladyship, win the confidence of the prince, and make himself indispensable, to my cost. Now, to retain the prince in the meshes of my family, I have resolved that my Ferdinand shall marry Lady Milford. Is that clear to you? WORM. Quite dazzling! Your excellency has at least convinced me that, compared with the president, the father is but a novice. Should the major prove as obedient a son as you show yourself a tender father, your demand may chance to be returned with a protest. PRESIDENT. Fortunately I have never yet had to fear opposition to my will when once I have pronounced, "It shall be so!" But now, Worm, that brings us back to our former subject! I will propose Lady Milford to my son this very day. The face which he puts upon it shall either confirm your suspicions or entirely confute them. WORM. Pardon me, my lord! The sullen face which he most assuredly will put upon it may be placed equally to the account of the bride you offer to him as of her from whom you wish to separate him. I would beg of you a more positive test! Propose to him some perfectly unexceptionable woman. Then, if he consents, let Secretary Worm break stones on the highway for the next three years. PRESIDENT (biting his lips). The devil! WORM. Such is the case, you may rest assured! The mother stupidity itself has, in her simplicity, betrayed all to me. PRESIDENT (pacing the room, and trying to repress his rage). Good! this very morning, then! WORM. Yet, let me entreat your excellency not to forget that the major is my master's son PRESIDENT. No harm shall come to him, Worm. WORM. And that my service in ridding you of an unwelcome daughter-in-law PRESIDENT. Should be rewarded by me helping you to a wife? That too, Worm! WORM (bowing with delight). Eternally your lordship's slave. (Going.) PRESIDENT (threatening him). As to what I have confided to you, Worm! If you dare but to whisper a syllable WORM (laughs). Then your excellency will no doubt expose my forgeries! [Exit. PRESIDENT. Yes, yes, you are safe enough! I hold you in the fetters of your own knavery, like a trout on the hook! Enter SERVANT. SERVANT. Marshal Kalb PRESIDENT. The very man I wished to see. Introduce him. [Exit SERVANT. SCENE VI. MARSHAL KALB, in a rich but tasteless court-dress, with Chamberlain's keys, two watches, sword, three-cornered hat, and hair dressed a la Herisson. He bustles up to the PRESIDENT, and diffuses a strong scent of musk through the whole theatre PRESIDENT. MARSHAL. Ah! good morning, my dear baron! Quite delighted to see you again pray forgive my not having paid my respects to you at an earlier hour the most pressing business the duke's bill of fare invitation cards arrangements for the sledge party to-day ah! besides it was necessary for me to be at the levee, to inform his highness of the state of the weather. PRESIDENT. True, marshal! Such weighty concerns were not to be neglected! MARSHAL. Then a rascally tailor, too, kept me waiting for him! PRESIDENT. And yet ready to the moment? MARSHAL. Nor is that all! One misfortune follows at the heels of the other to-day! Only hear me! PRESIDENT (absent). Can it be possible? MARSHAL. Just listen! Scarce had I quitted my carriage, when the horses became restive, and began to plunge and rear only imagine! splashed my breeches all over with mud! What was to be done? Fancy, my dear baron, just fancy yourself for a moment in my predicament! There I stood! the hour was late! a day's journey to return yet to appear before his highness in this good heavens! What did I bethink me of? I pretended to faint! They bundle me into my carriage! I drive home like mad change my dress hasten back and only think! in spite of all this I was the first person in the antechamber! What say you to that? PRESIDENT. A most admirable impromptu of mortal wit but tell me, Kalb, did you speak to the duke? MARSHAL (importantly). Full twenty minutes and a half. PRESIDENT. Indeed? Then doubtless you have important news to impart to me? MARSHAL (seriously, after a pause of reflection). His highness wears a Merde d'Oye beaver to-day. PRESIDENT. God bless me! and yet, marshal, I have even greater news to tell you. Lady Milford will soon become my daughter-in-law. That, I think will be new to you? MARSHAL. Is it possible! And is it already agreed upon? PRESIDENT. It is settled, marshal and you would oblige me by forthwith waiting upon her ladyship, and preparing her to receive Ferdinand's visit. You have full liberty, also, to circulate the news of my son's approaching nuptials. MARSHAL. My dear friend! With consummate pleasure! What can I desire more? I fly to the baroness this moment. Adieu! (Embracing him.) In less than three-quarters of an hour it shall be known throughout the town. [Skips off. PRESIDENT (smiling contemptuously). How can people say that such creatures are of no use in the world? Now, then, Master Ferdinand must either consent or give the whole town the lie. (Rings WORM enters.) Send my son hither. (WORM retires; the PRESIDENT walks up and down, full of thought.) SCENE VII. PRESIDENT FERDINAND. FERDINAND. In obedience to your commands, sir PRESIDENT. Ay, if I desire the presence of my son, I must command it Ferdinand, I have observed you for some time past, and find no longer that open vivacity of youth which once so delighted me. An unusual sorrow broods upon your features; you shun your father; you shun society. For shame, Ferdinand! At your age a thousand irregularities are easier forgiven than one instant of idle melancholy. Leave this to me, my son! Leave the care of your future happiness to my direction, and study only to co-operate with my designs come, Ferdinand, embrace me! FERDINAND. You are most gracious to-day, father! PRESIDENT. "To-day," you rogue? and your "to-day" with such a vinegar look? (Seriously.) Ferdinand! For whose sake have I trod that dangerous path which leads to the affections of the prince? For whose sake have I forever destroyed my peace with Heaven and my conscience? Hear me, Ferdinand I am speaking to my son. For whom have I paved the way by the removal of my predecessor? a deed which the more deeply gores my inward feelings the more carefully I conceal the dagger from the world! Tell me, Ferdinand, for whose sake have I done all this? FERDINAND (recoiling with horror). Surely not for mine, father, not for mine? Surely not on me can fall the bloody reflection of this murder? By my Almighty Maker, it were better never to have been born than to be the pretext for such a crime! PRESIDENT. What sayest thou? How? But I will attribute these strange notions to thy romantic brain, Ferdinand; let me not lose my temper ungrateful boy! Thus dost thou repay me for my sleepless nights? Thus for my restless anxiety to promote thy good? Thus for the never-dying scorpion of my conscience? Upon me must fall the burden of responsibility; upon me the curse, the thunderbolt of the Judge. Thou receivest thy fortune from another's hand the crime is not attached to the inheritance. FERDINAND (extending his right hand towards heaven). Here I solemnly abjure an inheritance which must ever remind me of a parent's guilt! PRESIDENT. Hear me, sirrah! and do not incense me! Were you left to your own direction you would crawl through life in the dust. FERDINAND. Oh! better, father, far, far better, than to crawl about a throne! PRESIDENT (repressing his anger). So! Then compulsion must make you sensible of your good fortune! To that point, which, with the utmost striving a thousand others fail to reach, you have been exalted in your very sleep. At twelve you received a commission; at twenty a command. I have succeeded in obtaining for you the duke's patronage. He bids you lay aside your uniform, and share with me his favor and his confidence. He spoke of titles embassies of honors bestowed but upon few. A glorious prospect spreads itself before you! The direct path to the place next the throne lies open to you! Nay, to the throne itself, if the actual power of ruling is equivalent to the mere symbol. Does not that idea awaken your ambition? FERDINAND. No! My ideas of greatness and happiness differ widely from yours. Your happiness is but seldom known, except by the misery of others. Envy, terror, hatred are the melancholy mirrors in which the smiles of princes are reflected. Tears, curses, and the wailings of despair, the horrid banquet that feasts your supposed elect of fortune; intoxicated with these they rush headlong into eternity, staggering to the throne of judgment. My ideas of happiness teach me to look for its fountain in myself! All my wishes lie centered in my heart! PRESIDENT. Masterly! Inimitable! Admirable! The first schooling I have received these thirty years! Pity that the brain at fifty should be so dull at learning! But that such talent may not rust, I will place one by your side on whom you can practise your harlequinade follies at pleasure. You will resolve resolve this very day to take a wife. FERDINAND (starting back amazed). Father! PRESIDENT. Answer me not. I have made proposals, in your name, to Lady Milford. You will instantly determine upon going to her, and declaring yourself her bridegroom. FERDINAND. Lady Milford! father? PRESIDENT. I presume she is not unknown to you! FERDINAND (passionately). To what brothel is she unknown through the dukedom? But pardon me, dearest father! It is ridiculous to imagine that your proposal can be serious. Would you call yourself father of that infamous son who married a licensed prostitute? PRESIDENT. Nay, more. I would ask her hand myself, if she would take a man of fifty. Would not you call yourself that infamous father's son? FERDINAND. No! as God lives! that would I not! PRESIDENT. An audacity, by my honor! which I pardon for its excessive singularity. FERDINAND. I entreat you, father, release me from a demand which would render it insupportable to call myself your son. PRESIDENT. Are you distracted, boy? What reasonable man would not thirst after a distinction which makes him, as one of a trio, the equal and co-partner of his sovereign? FERDINAND. You are quite an enigma to me, father! "A distinction," do you call it? A distinction to share that with a prince, wherein he places himself on a level with the meanest of his subjects? (The PRESIDENT bursts into a loud laugh.) You may scoff I must submit to it in a father. With what countenance should I support the gaze of the meanest laborer, who at least receives an undivided person as the portion of his bride? With what countenance should I present myself before the world? before the prince? nay, before the harlot herself, who seeks to wash out in my shame the brandmarks of her honor? PRESIDENT. Where in the world couldst thou collect such notions, boy? FERDINAND. I implore you, father, by heaven and earth! By thus sacrificing your only son you can never become so happy as you will make him miserable! If my life can be a step to your advancement, dispose of it. My life you gave me; and I will never hesitate a moment to sacrifice it wholly to your welfare. But my honor, father! If you deprive me of this, the giving me life was a mere trick of wanton cruelty, and I must equally curse the parent and the pander. PRESIDENT (tapping him on the shoulder in a friendly manner). That's as it should be, my dear boy! Now I see that you are a brave and noble fellow, and worthy of the first woman in the dukedom. You shall have her. This very day you shall be affianced to the Countess of Ostheim. FERDINAND (in new disorder). Is this, then, destined to be the hour of my destruction? PRESIDENT (regarding him with an eye of suspicion). In this union, I imagine, you can have no objection on the score of honor? FERDINAND. None, father, none whatever. Frederica of Ostheim would make any other the happiest of men. (Aside, in the greatest agitation.) His kindness rends in pieces that remnant of my heart which his cruelty left unwounded. PRESIDENT (his eye still fixed upon him). I expect your gratitude, Ferdinand! FERDINAND (rushes towards him and kisses his hands). Father, your goodness awakens every spark of sentiment in my bosom. Father! receive my warmest thanks for your kind intentions. Your choice is unexceptionable! But I cannot I dare not pity me, father, I never can love the countess. PRESIDENT (draws back). Ha! ha! now I've caught you, young gentleman! The cunning fox has tumbled into the trap. Oh, you artful hypocrite! It was not then honor which made you refuse Lady Milford? It was not the woman, but the nuptials which alarmed you! (FERDINAND stands petrified for a moment; then recovers himself and prepares to quit the chamber hastily.) Whither now? Stay, sir. Is this the respect due to your father? (FERDINAND returns slowly.) Her ladyship expects you. The duke has my promise! Both court and city believe all is settled. If thou makest me appear a liar, boy! If, before the duke the lady the court and city thou shouldst make me appear a liar! tremble, boy! or when I have gained information of certain circumstances how now? Why does the color so suddenly forsake your cheeks? FERDINAND (pale and trembling). How? What? Nothing it is nothing, my father! PRESIDENT (casting upon him a dreadful look). Should there be cause. If I should discover the source whence this obstinacy proceeds! Boy! boy! the very suspicion drives me distracted! Leave me this moment. 'Tis now the hour of parade. As soon as the word is given, go thou to her ladyship. At my nod a dukedom trembles; we shall see whether a disobedient son dare dispute my will! (Going, returns.) Remember, sir! fail not to wait on Lady Milford, or dread my anger! [Exit. FERDINAND (awakens, as if from a dream). Is he gone? Was that a father's voice? Yes, I will go I will see her I will say such things to her hold such a mirror before her eyes. Then, base woman, shouldst thou still demand my hand in the presence of the assembled nobles, the military, and the people gird thyself with all the pride of thy native Britain I, a German youth, will spurn thee! [Exit. ACT II. SCENE I. A room in LADY MILFORD'S house. On the right of the stage stands a sofa, on the left a pianoforte. LADY MILFORD, in a loose but elegant negligee, is running her hand over the keys of the pianoforte as SOPHY advances from the window. SOPHY. The parade is over, and the officers are separating, but I see no signs of the major. LADY MILFORD (rises and walks up and down the room in visible agitation). I know not what ails me to-day, Sophy! I never felt so before you say you do not see him! It is evident enough that he is by no means impatient for this meeting my heart feels oppressed as if by some heavy crime. Go! Sophy, order the most spirited horse in the stable to be saddled for me I must away into the open air where I may look on the blue sky and hear the busy hum of man. I must dispel this gloominess by change and motion. SOPHY. If you feel out of spirits, my lady, why not invite company! Let the prince give an entertainment here, or have the ombre table brought to you. If the prince and all his court were at my beck and call I would let no whim or fancy trouble me! LADY MILFORD (throwing herself on the couch). Pray, spare me. I would gladly give a jewel in exchange for every hour's respite from the infliction of such company! I always have my rooms tapestried with these creatures! Narrow-minded, miserable beings, who are quite shocked if by chance a candid and heartfelt word should escape one's lips! and stand aghast as though they saw an apparition; slaves, moved by a single puppet-wire, which I can govern as easily as the threads of my embroidery! What can I have in common with such insipid wretches, whose souls, like their watches, are regulated by machinery? What pleasure can I have in the society of people whose answers to my questions I know beforehand? How can I hold communion with men who dare not venture on an opinion of their own lest it should differ from mine! Away with them I care not to ride a horse that has not spirit enough to champ the bit! (Goes to the window.) SOPHY. But surely, my lady, you except the prince, the handsomest, the wittiest, and the most gallant man in all his duchy. LADY MILFORD (returning). Yes, in his duchy, that was well said and it is only a royal duchy, Sophy, that could in the least excuse my weakness. You say the world envies me! Poor thing! It should rather pity me! Believe me, of all who drink of the streams of royal bounty there is none more miserable than the sovereign's favorite, for he who is great and mighty in the eyes of others comes to her but as the humble suppliant! It is true that by the talisman of his greatness he can realize every wish of my heart as readily as the magician calls forth the fairy palace from the depths of the earth! He can place the luxuries of both Indies upon my table, turn the barren wilderness to a paradise, can bid the broad rivers of his land play in triumphal arches over my path, or expend all the hard-earned gains of his subjects in a single feu-de-joie to my honor. But can he school his heart to respond to one great or ardent emotion? Can he extort one noble thought from his weak and indigent brain? Alas! my heart is thirsting amid all this ocean of splendor; what avail, then, a thousand virtuous sentiments when I am only permitted to indulge in the pleasures of the senses. SOFHY (regarding her with surprise). Dear lady, you amaze me! how long is it since I entered your service? LADY MILFORD. Do you ask because this is the first day on which you have learnt to know me? I have sold my honor to the prince, it is true, but my heart is still my own a heart, dear Sophy, which even yet may be worth the acceptance of an honorable man a heart over which the pestilential blast of courtly corruption has passed as the breath which for a moment dims the mirror's lustre. Believe me my spirit would long since have revolted against this miserable thraldom could my ambition have submitted to see another advanced to my place. SOPHY. And could a heart like yours so readily surrender itself to mere ambition? LADY MILFORD (with energy). Has it not already been avenged? nay, is it not even at this very moment making me pay a heavy atonement (with emphasis laying her hand on SOPHY'S shoulder)? Believe me, Sophy, woman has but to choose between ruling and serving, but the utmost joy of power is a worthless possession if the mightier joy of being slave to the man we love be denied us. SOPHY. A truth, dear lady, which I could least of all have expected to hear from your lips! LADY MILFORD. And wherefore, Sophy? Does not woman show, by her childish mode of swaying the sceptre of power, that she is only fit to go in leading-strings! Have not my fickle humors my eager pursuit of wild dissipation betrayed to you that I sought in these to stifle the still wilder throbbings of my heart? SOPHY (starting back with surprise). This from you, my lady? LADY MILFORD (continuing with increasing energy). Appease these throbbings. Give me the man in whom my thoughts are centered the man I adore, without whom life were worse than death. Let me but hear from his lips that the tears of love with which my eyes are bedewed outvie the gems that sparkle in my hair, and I will throw at the feet of the prince his heart and his dukedom, and flee to the uttermost parts of the earth with the man of my love! SOPHY (looking at her in alarm). Heavens! my lady! control your emotion LADY MILFORD (in surprise). You change color! To what have I given utterance? Yet, since I have said thus much, let me say still more let my confidence be a pledge of your fidelity, I will tell you all. SOPHY (looking anxiously around). I fear my lady I dread it I have heard enough! LADY MILFORD. This alliance with the major you, like the rest of the world, believe to be the result of a court intrigue Sophy, blush not be not ashamed of me it is the work of my love! SOPHY. Heavens! As I suspected! LADY MILFORD. Yes, Sophy, they are all deceived. The weak prince the diplomatic baron the silly marshal each and all of these are firmly convinced that this marriage is a most infallible means of preserving me to the prince, and of uniting us still more firmly! But this will prove the very means of separating us forever, and bursting asunder these execrable bonds. The cheater cheated outwitted by a weak woman. Ye yourselves are leading me to the man of my heart this was all I sought. Let him but once be mine be but mine then, oh, then, a long farewell to all this despicable pomp! SCENE II. An old valet of the DUKE'S, with a casket of jewels. The former. VALET. His serene highness begs your ladyship's acceptance of these jewels as a nuptial present. They have just arrived from Venice. LADY MILFORD (opens the casket and starts back in astonishment). What did these jewels cost the duke? VALET. Nothing! LADY MILFORD. Nothing! Are you beside yourself? (retreating a step or two.) Old man! you fix on me a look as though you would pierce me through. Did you say these precious jewels cost nothing? VALET. Yesterday seven thousand children of the land left their homes to go to America they pay for all. LADY MILFORD (sets the casket suddenly down, and paces up and down the room; after a pause, to the VALET). What distresses you, old man? you are weeping! VALET (wiping his eyes, and trembling violently). Yes, for these jewels. My two sons are among the number. LADY MILFORD. But they went not by compulsion? VALET (laughing bitterly). Oh! dear no! they were all volunteers! There were certainly some few forward lads who pushed to the front of the ranks and inquired of the colonel at what price the prince sold his subjects per yoke, upon which our gracious ruler ordered the regiments to be marched to the parade, and the malcontents to be shot. We heard the report of the muskets, and saw brains and blood spurting about us, while the whole band shouted "Hurrah for America!" LADY MILFORD. And I heard nothing of all this! saw nothing! VALET. No, most gracious lady, because you rode off to the bear-hunt with his highness just at the moment the drum was beating for the march. 'Tis a pity your ladyship missed the pleasure of the sight here, crying children might be seen following their wretched father there, a mother distracted with grief was rushing forward to throw her tender infant among the bristling bayonets here, a bride and bridegroom were separated with the sabre's stroke and there, graybeards were seen to stand in despair, and fling their very crutches after their sons in the New World and, in the midst of all this, the drums were beating loudly, that the prayers and lamentations might not reach the Almighty ear. LADY MILFORD (rising in violent emotion). Away with these jewels their rays pierce my bosom like the flames of hell. Moderate your grief, old man. Your children shall be restored to you. You shall again clasp them to your bosom. VALET (with warmth). Yes, heaven knows! We shall meet again! As they passed the city gates they turned round and cried aloud: "God bless our wives and children long life to our gracious sovereign. At the day of judgment we shall all meet again!" LADY MILFORD (walks up and down the room in great agitation). Horrible! most horrible! and they would persuade me that I had dried up all the tears in the land. Now, indeed, my eyes are fearfully opened! Go tell the prince that I will thank him in person! (As the valet is going she drops the purse into his hat.) And take this as a recompense for the truth you have revealed to me. VALET (throws the purse with contempt on the table). Keep it, with your other treasures. [Exit. LADY MILFORD (looking after him in astonishment). Sophy, follow him, and inquire his name. His sons shall be restored to him. (SOPHY goes. LADY MILFORD becomes absorbed in thought. Pause. Then to SOPHY as she returns.) Was there not a report that some town on the frontier had been destroyed by fire, and four hundred families reduced to beggary? (She rings.) SOPHY. What has made your ladyship just think of that? Yes such was certainly the fact, and most of these poor creatures are either compelled to serve their creditors as bondsmen, or are dragging out their miserable days in the depths of the royal silver mines. Enter a SERVANT. What are your ladyship's commands? LADY MILFORD (giving him the case of jewels). Carry this to my treasurer without delay. Let the jewels be sold and the money distributed among the four hundred families who were ruined by the fire. SOPHY. Consider, my lady, the risk you run of displeasing his highness. LADY MILFORD (with dignity). Should I encircle my brows with the curses of his subjects? (Makes a sign to the servant, who goes away with the jewel case.) Wouldst thou have me dragged to the earth by the dreadful weight of the tears of misery? Nay! Sophy, it is better far to wear false jewels on the brow, and to have the consciousness of a good deed within the breast! SOPHY. But diamonds of such value! Why not rather give some that are less precious? Truly, my lady, it is an unpardonable act. LADY MILFORD. Foolish girl! For this deed more brilliants and pearls will flow for me in one moment than kings ever wore in their richest diadems! Ay, and infinitely more beautiful! SERVANT enters. Major von Walter! SOPHY (running hastily to the help of LADY MILFORD, who seems fainting). Heavens, my lady, you change color! LADY MILFORD. The first man who ever made me tremble. (To the SERVANT.) I am not well but stay what said the major? how? O Sophy! I look sadly ill, do I not? SOPHY. I entreat you, my lady, compose yourself. SERVANT. Is it your ladyship's wish that I should deny you to the major? LADY MILFORD (hesitating). Tell him I shall be happy to see him. (Exit SERVANT.) What shall I say to him, Sophy? how shall I receive him? I will be silent alas! I fear he will despise my weakness. He will ah, me! what sad forebodings oppress my heart! You are going Sophy! stay, yet no, no he comes yes, stay, stay with me SOPHY. Collect yourself, my lady, the major SCENE III. FERDINAND VON WALTER. The former. FERDINAND (with a slight bow). I hope I do not interrupt your ladyship? LADY MILFORD (with visible emotion). Not at all, baron not in the least. FERDINAND. I wait on your ladyship, at the command of my father. LADY MILFORD. Therein I am his debtor. FERDINAND. And I am charged to announce to you that our marriage is determined on. Thus far I fulfil the commission of my father. LADY MILFORD (changing color and trembling). And not of your own heart? FERDINAND. Ministers and panders have no concern with hearts. LADY MILFORD (almost speechless with emotion). And you yourself have you nothing to add? FERDINAND (looking at SOPHY). Much! my lady, much! LADY MILFORD (motions to SOPHY to withdraw). May I beg you to take a seat by my side? FERDINAND. I will be brief, lady. LADY MILFORD. Well! FERDINAND. I am a man of honor! LADY MILFORD. Whose worth I know how to appreciate. FERDINAND. I am of noble birth! LADY MILFORD. Noble as any in the land! FERDINAND. A soldier! LADY MILFORD (in a soft, affectionate manner). Thus far you have only enumerated advantages which you share in common with many others. Why are you so silent regarding those noble qualities which are peculiarly your own? FERDINAND (coldly). Here they would be out of place. LADY MILFORD (with increasing agitation). In what light am I to understand this prelude? FERDINAND (slowly, and with emphasis). As the protest of the voice of honor should you think proper to enforce the possession of my hand! LADY MILFORD (starting with indignation). Major von Walter! What language is this? FERDINAND (calmly). The language of my heart of my unspotted name and of this true sword. LADY MILFORD. Your sword was given to you by the prince. FERDINAND. 'Twas the state which gave it, by the hands of the prince. God bestowed on me an honest heart. My nobility is derived from a line of ancestry extending through centuries. LADY MILFORD. But the authority of the prince FERDINAND (with warmth). Can he subvert the laws of humanity, or stamp glory on our actions as easily as he stamps value on the coin of his realm? He himself is not raised above the laws of honor, although he may stifle its whispers with gold and shroud his infamy in robes of ermine! But enough of this, lady! it is too late now to talk of blasted prospects or of the desecration of ancestry or of that nice sense of honor girded on with my sword or of the world's opinion. All these I am ready to trample under foot as soon as you have proved to me that the reward is not inferior to the sacrifice. LADY MILFORD (in extreme distress turning away). Major! I have not deserved this! FERDINAND (taking her hand). Pardon me, lady we are without witnesses. The circumstance which brings us together to-day and only to-day justifies me, nay, compels me, to reveal to you my most secret feelings. I cannot comprehend, lady, how a being gifted with so much beauty and spirit qualities which a man cannot fail to admire could throw herself away on a prince incapable of valuing aught beyond her mere person and yet not feel some visitings of shame, when she steps forth to offer her heart to a man of honor! LADY MILFORD (looking at him with an air of pride). Say on, sir, without reserve. FERDINAND. You call yourself an Englishwoman pardon me, lady, I can hardly believe you. The free-born daughter of the freest people under heaven a people too proud to imitate even foreign virtues would surely never have sold herself to foreign vices! It is not possible, lady, that you should be a native of Britain, unless indeed your heart be as much below as the sons of Britannia vaunt theirs to be above all others! LADY MILFORD. Have you done, sir? FERDINAND. Womanly vanity passions temperament a natural appetite for pleasure all these might, perhaps, be pleaded in extenuation for virtue often survives honor and many who once trod the paths of infamy have subsequently reconciled themselves to society by the performance of noble deeds, and have thus thrown a halo of glory round their evil doings but if this were so, whence comes the monstrous extortion that now oppresses the people with a weight never before known? This I would ask in the name of my fatherland and now, lady, I have done! LADY MILFORD (with gentleness and dignity). This is the first time, Baron von Walter, that words such as these have been addressed to me and you are the only man to whom I would in return have vouchsafed an answer. Your rejection of my hand commands my esteem. Your invectives against my heart have my full forgiveness, for I will not believe you sincere, since he who dares hold such language to a woman, that could ruin him in an instant must either believe that she possesses a great and noble heart or must be the most desperate of madmen. That you ascribe the misery of this land to me may He forgive, before whose throne you, and I, and the prince shall one day meet! But, as in my person you have insulted the daughter of Britain, so in vindication of my country's honor you must hear my exculpation. FERDINAND (leaning on his sword). Lady, I listen with interest. LADY MILFORD. Hear, then, that which I have never yet breathed to mortal, and which none but yourself will ever learn from my lips. I am not the low adventurer you suppose me, sir! Nay! did I listen to the voice of pride, I might even boast myself to be of royal birth; I am descended from the unhappy Thomas Norfolk, who paid the penalty of his adherence to the cause of Mary, Queen of Scots, by a bloody death on the scaffold. My father, who, as royal chamberlain, had once enjoyed his sovereign's confidence, was accused of maintaining treasonable relations with France, and was condemned and executed by a decree of the Parliament of Great Britain. Our estates were confiscated, and our family banished from their native soil. My mother died on the day of my father's execution, and I then a girl of fourteen fled to Germany with one faithful attendant. A casket of jewels, and this crucifix, placed in my bosom by my dying mother, were all my fortune! [FERDINAND, absorbed in thought, surveys LADY MILFORD with looks of compassion and sympathy. LADY MILFORD (continuing with increased emotion). Without a name without protection or property a foreigner and an orphan, I reached Hamburg. I had learnt nothing but a little French, and to run my fingers over the embroidery frame, or the keys of my harpsichord. But, though I was ignorant of all useful arts, I had learnt full well to feast off gold and silver, to sleep beneath silken hangings, to bid attendant pages obey my voice, and to listen to the honeyed words of flattery and adulation. Six years passed away in sorrow and in sadness the remnant of my scanty means was fast melting away my old and faithful nurse was no more and and then it was that fate brought your sovereign to Hamburg. I was walking beside the shores of the Elbe, wondering, as I gazed on its waters, whether they or my sorrows were the deeper, when the duke crossed my path. He followed me, traced me to my humble abode, and, casting himself at my feet, vowed that he loved me. (She pauses, and, after struggling with her emotion, continues in a voice choked by tears.) All the images of my happy childhood were revived in hues of delusive brightness while the future lowered before me black as the grave. My heart panted for communion with another and I sank into the arms opened to receive me! (Turning away.) And now you condemn me! FERDINAND (greatly agitated, follows her and leads her back). Lady! heavens! what do I hear! What have I done? The guilt of my conduct is unveiled in all its deformity! It is impossible you should forgive me. LADY MILFORD (endeavoring to overcome her emotion). Hear me on! The prince, it is true, overcame my unprotected youth, but the blood of the Howards still glowed within my veins, and never ceased to reproach me; that I, the descendant of royal ancestors, should stoop to be a prince's paramour! Pride and destiny still contended in my bosom, when the duke brought me hither, where scenes the most revolting burst upon my sight! The voluptuousness of the great is an insatiable hyena the craving of whose appetite demands perpetual victims. Fearfully had it laid this country waste separating bridegroom and bride and tearing asunder even the holy bonds of marriage. Here it had destroyed the tranquil happiness of a whole family there the blighting pest had seized on a young and inexperienced heart, and expiring victims called down bitter imprecations on the heads of the undoers. It was then that I stepped forth between the lamb and the tiger, and, in a moment of dalliance, extorted from the duke his royal promise that this revolting licentiousness should cease. FERDINAND (pacing the room in violent agitation). No more, lady! No more! LADY MILFORD. This gloomy period was succeeded by one still more gloomy. The court swarmed with French and Italian adventurers the royal sceptre became the plaything of Parisian harlots, and the people writhed and bled beneath their capricious rule. Each had her day. I saw them sink before me, one by one, for I was the most skilful coquette of all! It was then that I seized and wielded the tyrant's sceptre whilst he slumbered voluptuously in my embrace then, Walter, thy country, for the first time, felt the hand of humanity, and reposed in confidence on my bosom. (A pause, during which she gazes upon him with tenderness.) Oh! 'that the man, by whom, of all others, I least wish to be misunderstood, should compel me to turn braggart and parade my unobtrusive virtues to the glare of admiration! Walter, I have burst open the doors of prisons I have cancelled death-warrants and shortened many a frightful eternity upon the galleys. Into wounds beyond my power to heal I have at least poured soothing balsam. I have hurled mighty villains to the earth, and oft with the tears of a harlot saved the cause of innocence from impending ruin. Ah! young man, how sweet were then my feelings! How proudly did these actions teach my heart to support the reproaches of my noble blood! And now comes the man who alone can repay me for all that I have suffered the man, whom perhaps my relenting destiny created as a compensation for former sorrows the man, whom with ardent affection, I already clasped in my dreams. FERDINAND (interrupting her). Hold, lady, hold! You exceed the bounds of our conference! You undertook to clear yourself from reproach, and you make me a criminal! Spare me, I beseech you! Spare a heart already overwhelmed by confusion and remorse! LADY MILFORD (grasping his hand). You must hear me, Walter! hear me now or never. Long enough has the heroine sustained me; now you must feel the whole weight of these tears! Mark me, Walter! Should an unfortunate impetuously, irresistibly attracted towards you clasp you to her bosom full of unutterable, inextinguishable love should this unfortunate bowed down with the consciousness of shame disgusted with vicious pleasures heroically exalted by the inspiration of virtue throw herself thus into your arms (embracing him in an eager and supplicating manner); should she do this, and you still pronounce the freezing word "Honor!" Should she pray that through you she might be saved that through you she might be restored to her hopes of heaven! (Turning away her head, and speaking in a hollow, faltering voice.) Or should she, her prayer refused, listen to the voice of despair, and to escape from your image plunge herself into yet more fearful depths of infamy and vice FERDINAND (breaking from her in great emotion). No, by heaven! This is more than I can endure! Lady, I am compelled Heaven and earth compels me to make the honest avowal of my sentiments and situation. LADY MILFORD (hastening from him). Oh! not now! By all that is holy I entreat you spare me in this dreadful moment when my lacerated heart bleeds from a thousand wounds. Be your decision life or death I dare not I will not hear it! FERDINAND. I entreat you, lady! I insist! What I have to say will mitigate my offence, and warmly plead your forgiveness for the past. I have been deceived in you, lady. I expected nay, I wished to find you deserving my contempt. I came determined to insult you, and to make myself the object of your hate. Happy would it have been for us both had my purpose succeeded! (He pauses; then proceeds in a gentle and faltering voice.) Lady, I love! I love a maid of humble birth Louisa Miller is her name, the daughter of a music-master. (LADY MILFORD turns away pale and greatly agitated.) I know into what an abyss I plunge myself; but, though prudence bids me conceal my passion, honor overpowers its precepts. I am the criminal I first destroyed the golden calm of Louisa's innocence I lulled her heart with aspiring hopes, and surrendered it, like a betrayer, a prey to the wildest of passions. You will bid me remember my rank my birth my father schemes of aggrandisement. But in vain I love! My hopes become more fervent as the breach widens between nature and the mere conventions of society between my resolution and worldly prejudices! We shall see whether love or interest is victorious. (LADY MILFORD during this has retired to the extreme end of the apartment, and covers her face with both hands. FERDINAND approaches her.) Have you aught to answer, lady? LADY MILFORD (in a tone of intense suffering). Nothing! Nothing! but that you destroy yourself and me and, with us yet a third. FERDINAND. A third? LADY MILFORD. Never can you marry Louisa; never can you be happy with me. We shall all be the victims of your father's rashness. I can never hope to possess the heart of a husband who has been forced to give me his hand. FERDINAND. Forced, lady? Forced? And yet given? Will you enforce a hand without a heart? Will you tear from a maiden a man who is the whole world to her? Will you tear a maiden from a man who has centered all his hopes of happiness on her alone? Will you do this, lady? you who but a moment before were the lofty, noble-minded daughter of Britain? LADY MILFORD. I will because I must! (earnestly and firmly). My passions, Walter, overcome my tenderness for you. My honor has no alternative. Our union is the talk of the whole city. Every eye, every shaft of ridicule is bent against me. 'Twere a stain which time could never efface should a subject of the prince reject my hand! Appease your father if you have the power! Defend yourself as you best may! my resolution is taken. The mine is fired and I abide the issue. [Exit. FERDINAND remains in speechless astonishment for some moments; then rushes wildly out. SCENE IV. Miller's House. MILLER meeting LOUISA and MRS. MILLER. MILLER. Ay! ay! I told you how it would be! LOUISA (hastening to him with anxiety). What, father? What? MILLER (running up and down the room). My cloak, there. Quick, quick! I must be beforehand with him. My cloak, I say! Yes, yes! this was just what I expected! LOUISA. For God's sake, father! tell me? MRS. MILLER. What is the matter, Miller? What alarms you? MILLER (throwing down his wig). Let that go to the friezer. What is the matter, indeed? And my beard, too, is nearly half an inch long. What's the matter? What do you think, you old carrion. The devil has broke loose, and you may look out for squalls. MRS. MILLER. There, now, that's just the way! When anything goes wrong it is always my fault. MILLER. Your fault? Yes, you brimstone fagot! and whose else should it be? This very morning when you were holding forth about that confounded major, did I not say then what would be the consequence? That knave, Worm, has blabbed. MRS. MILLER. Gracious heavens! But how do you know? MILLER. How do I know? Look yonder! a messenger of the minister is already at the door inquiring for the fiddler. LOUISA (turning pale, and sitting down). Oh! God! I am in agony! MILLER. And you, too, with that languishing air? (laughs bitterly). But, right! Right! There is an old saying that where the devil keeps a breeding-cage he is sure to hatch a handsome daughter. MRS. MILLER. But how do you know that Louisa is in question? You may have been recommended to the duke; he may want you in his orchestra. MILLER (jumping up, and seizing his fiddlestick). May the sulphurous rain of hell consume thee! Orchestra, indeed! Ay, where you, you old procuress, shall howl the treble whilst my smarting back groans the base (Throwing himself upon a chair.) Oh! God in heaven! LOUISA (sinks on the sofa, pale as death). Father! Mother! Oh! my heart sinks within me. MILLER (starting up with anger). But let me only lay hands on that infernal quill-driver! I'll make him skip be it in this world or the next; if I don't pound him to a jelly, body and soul; if I don't write all the Ten Commandments, the seven Penitential Psalms, the five books of Moses, and the whole of the Prophets upon his rascally hide so distinctly that the blue hieroglyphics shall be legible at the day of judgment if I don't, may I MRS. MILLER. Yes, yes, curse and swear your hardest! That's the way to frighten the devil! Oh, dear! Oh, dear! Oh, gracious heavens! What shall we do? Who can advise us? Speak, Miller, speak; this silence distracts me! (She runs screaming up and down the room.) MILLER. I will instantly to the minister! I will open my mouth boldly, and tell him all from beginning to end. You knew it before me, and ought to have given me a hint of what was going on! The girl might yet have been advised. It might still have been time to save her! But, no! There was something for your meddling and making, and you must needs add fuel to the fire. Now you have made your bed you may lie on it. As you have brewed so you may drink; I shall take my daughter under my arm and be off with her over the borders. SCENE V. MILLER, MRS. MILLER, LOUISA, FERDINND. (All speaking together). FERDINAND (rushes in, terrified, and out of breath). Has my father been here? LOUISA (starts back in horror). His father? Gracious heaven! MRS. MILLER (wringing her hands). The minister here? Then it's all over with us! MILLER (laughs bitterly). Thank God! Thank God! Now comes our benefit! FERDINAND (rushing towards LOUISA, and clasping her in his arms). Mine thou art, though heaven and hell were placed between us! LOUISA. I am doomed! Speak, Ferdinand! Did you not utter that dreaded name? Your father? FERDINAND. Be not alarmed! the danger has passed! I have thee again! again thou hast me! Let me regain my breath on thy dear bosom. It was a dreadful hour! LOUISA. What was a dreadful hour? Answer me, Ferdinand! I die with apprehension! FERDINAND (drawing back, gazing upon her earnestly, then in a solemn tone). An hour, Louisa, when another's form stepped between my heart and thee an hour in which my love grew pale before my conscience when Louisa ceased to be all in all to Ferdinand! [LOUISA sinks back upon her chair, and conceals her face. (FERDINAND stands before her in speechless agitation, then turns away from her suddenly and exclaims). Never, never! Baroness, 'tis impossible! you ask too much! Never can I sacrifice this innocence at your shrine. No, by the eternal God! I cannot recall my oath, which speaks to me from thy soul thrilling eyes louder than the thunders of heaven! Behold, lady! Inhuman father, look on this! Would you have me destroy this angel? Shall my perfidy kindle a hell in this heavenly bosom? (turning towards her with firmness). No! I will bear her to thy throne, Almighty Judge! Thy voice shall declare if my affection be a crime. (He grasps her hand, and raises her from the sofa.) Courage, my beloved! thou hast conquered and I come forth a victor from the terrible conflict! LOUISA. No, no, Ferdinand, conceal nothing from me! Declare boldly the dreadful decree! You named your father! You spoke of the baroness! The shivering of death seizes my heart! 'Tis said she is about to be married! FERDINAND (quite overcome, throws himself at her feet). Yes, and to me, dear unfortunate. Such is my father's will! LOUISA (after a deep pause, in a tremulous voice, but with assumed resignation). Well! Why am I thus affrighted? Has not my dear father often told me that you never could be mine? But I was obstinate, and believed him not. (A second pause; she falls weeping into her father's arms.) Father, thy daughter is thine own again! Father, forgive me! 'Twas not your child's fault that the dream was so heavenly the waking so terrible! MILLER. Louisa! Louisa! O merciful heaven! she has lost her senses! My daughter! My poor child! Curses upon thy seducer! Curses upon the pandering mother who threw thee in his way! MRS. MILLER (weeping on LOUISA'S neck). Daughter, do I deserve this curse? God forgive you, major! What has this poor lamb done that you bring this misery upon her? FERDINAND (with resolution). I will unravel the meshes of these intrigues. I will burst asunder these iron chains of prejudice. As a free-born man will I make my choice, and crush these insect souls with the colossal force of my love! [Going. LOUISA (rises trembling from the sofa, and attempts to follow him). Stay, oh, stay! Whither are you going? Father! Mother! He deserts us in this fearful hour! MRS. MILLER (hastens towards him, and detains him). The president is coming hither? He will ill-use my child! He will ill-use us all, and yet, major, you are going to leave us. MILLER (laughs hysterically). Leave us. Of course he is! What should hinder him? The girl has given him all she had. (Grasping FERDINAND with one hand, and LOUISA with the other.) Listen to me, young gentleman. The only way out of my house is over my daughter's body. If you possess one single spark of honor await your father's coming; tell him, deceiver, how you stole her young and inexperienced heart; or, by the God who made me! (thrusting LOUISA towards him with violence and passion) you shall crush before my eyes this trembling worm whom love for you has brought to shame and infamy! FERDINAND (returns, and walks to and fro in deep thought). 'Tis true, the President's power is great parental authority is a mighty word even crimes claim respect when concealed within its folds. He may push that authority far very far! But love goes beyond it. Hear me, Louisa; give me thy hand! (clasping it firmly). As surely as I hope for Heaven's mercy in my dying hour, I swear that the moment which separates these hands shall also rend asunder the thread that binds me to existence! LOUISA. You terrify me! Turn from me! Your lips tremble! Your eyes roll fearfully! FERDINAND. Nay, Louisa! fear nothing! It is not madness which prompts my oath! 'tis the choicest gift of Heaven, decision, sent to my aid at that critical moment, when an oppressed bosom can only find relief in some desperate remedy. I love thee, Louisa! Thou shalt be mine! 'Tis resolved! And now for my father! [He rushes out, and is met by the PRESIDENT. SCENE VI. MILLER, MRS. MILLER, LOUISA, FERDINAND, PRESIDENT, with SERVANTS. PRESIDENT (as he enters). So! here he is! (All start in terror.) FERDINAND (retiring a few paces). In the house of innocence! PRESIDENT. Where a son learns obedience to his father! FERDINAND. Permit me to PRESIDENT (interrupting him, turns to MILLER). The father, I presume? MILLER. I am Miller, the musician. PRESIDENT (to MRS. MILLER). And you, the mother? MRS. MILLER. Yes, alas! her unfortunate mother! FERDINAND (to MILLER.) Father, take Louisa to her chamber she is fainting. PRESIDENT. An unnecessary precaution! I will soon arouse her. (To LOUISA.) How long have you been acquainted with the President's son? LOUISA (with timidity). Of the President's son I have never thought. Ferdinand von Walter has paid his addresses to me since November last. FERDINAND. And he adores her! PRESIDENT (to LOUISA). Has he given you any assurance of his love? FERDINAND. But a few minutes since, the most solemn, and God was my witness. PRESIDENT (to his son angrily). Silence! You shall have opportunity enough of confessing your folly. (To LOUISA.) I await your answer. LOUISA. He swore eternal love to me. FERDINAND. And I will keep my oath. PRESIDENT (to FERDINAND). Must I command your silence? (To LOUISA). Did you accept his rash vows? LOUISA (with tenderness). I did, and gave him mine in exchange. FERDINAND (resolutely). The bond is irrevocable PRESIDENT (to FERDINAND). If you dare to interrupt me again I'll teach you better manners. (To LOUISA, sneeringly.) And he paid handsomely every time, no doubt? LOUISA. I do not understand your question. PRESIDENT (with an insulting laugh). Oh, indeed! Well, I only meant to hint that as everything has its price I hope you have been more provident than to bestow your favors gratis or perhaps you were satisfied with merely participating in the pleasure? Eh? how was it? FERDINAND (infuriated). Hell and confusion! What does this mean? LOUISA (to FERDINAND, with dignity and emotion). Baron von Walter, now you are free! FERDINAND. Father! virtue though clothed in a beggar's garb commands respect! PRESIDENT (laughing aloud). A most excellent joke! The father is commanded to honor his son's strumpet! LOUISA. Oh! Heaven and earth! (Sinks down in a swoon.) FERDINAND (drawing his sword). Father, you gave me life, and, till now, I acknowledged your claim on it. That debt is cancelled. (Replaces his sword in the scabbard, and points to LOUISA.) There lies the bond of filial duty torn to atoms! MILLER (who has stood apart trembling, now comes forward, by turns gnashing his teeth in rage, and shrinking back in terror). Your excellency, the child is the father's second self. No offence, I hope! Who strikes the child hits the father blow for blow that's our rule here. No offence, I hope! MRS. MILLER. God have mercy on us! Now the old man has begun we shall all catch it with a vengeance! PRESIDENT (who has not understood what MILLER said). What? is the old pander stirred up? We shall have something to settle together presently, Mr. Pander! MILLER. You mistake me, my lord. My name is Miller, at your service for an adagio but, as to ladybirds, I cannot serve you. As long as there is such an assortment at court, we poor citizens can't afford to lay in stock! No offence, I hope! MRS. MILLER. For Heaven's sake, man, hold your tongue! would you ruin both wife and child? FERDINAND (to his father). You play but a sorry part here, my lord, and might well have dispensed with these witnesses. MILLER (coming nearer, with increasing confidence). To be plain and above board No offence, I hope your excellency may have it all your own way in the Cabinet but this is my house. I'm your most obedient, very humble servant when I wait upon you with a petition, but the rude, unmannerly intruder I have the right to bundle out no offence, I hope! PRESIDENT (pale with anger, and approaching MILLER). What? What's that you dare to utter? MILLER (retreating a few steps). Only a little bit of my mind sir no offence, I hope! PRESIDENT (furiously). Insolent villain! Your impertinence shall procure you a lodging in prison. (To his servants). Call in the officers of justice! Away! (Some of the attendants go out. The PRESIDENT paces the stage with a furious air.) The father shall to prison; the mother and her strumpet daughter to the pillory! Justice shall lend her sword to my rage! For this insult will I have ample amends. Shall such contemptible creatures thwart my plans, and set father and son against each other with impunity? Tremble, miscreants! I will glut my hate in your destruction the whole brood of you father, mother, and daughter shall be sacrificed to my vengeance! FERDINAND (to MILLER, in a collected and firm manner). Oh! not so! Fear not, friends! I am your protector. (Turning to the PRESIDENT, with deference). Be not so rash, father! For your own sake let me beg of you no violence. There is a corner of my heart where the name of father has never yet been heard. Oh! press not into that! PRESIDENT. Silence, unworthy boy! Rouse not my anger to greater fury! MILLER (recovering from a stupor). Wife, look you to your daughter! I fly to the duke. His highness' tailor God be praised for reminding me of it at this moment learns the flute of me I cannot fail of success. (Is hastening off.) PRESIDENT. To the duke, will you? Have you forgotten that I am the threshold over which you must pass, or failing, perish? To the duke, you fool? Try to reach him with your lamentations, when, reduced to a living skeleton, you lie buried in a dungeon five fathoms deep, where light and sound never enter; where darkness goggles at hell with gloating eyes! There gnash thy teeth in anguish; there rattle thy chains in despair, and groan, "Woe is me! This is beyond human endurance!" SCENE VII. Officers of Justice the former. FERDINAND (flies to LOUISA, who, overcome with fear, faints in his arms.) Louisa! Help, for God's sake! Terror overpowers her! [MILLER, catching up his cane and putting on his hat, prepares for defense. MRS. MILLER throws herself on her knees before the PRESIDENT. PRESIDENT (to the officers, showing his star). Arrest these offenders in the duke's name. Boy, let go that strumpet! Fainting or not when once her neck is fitted with the iron collar the mob will pelt her till she revives. MRS. MILLER. Mercy, your excellency! Mercy! mercy! MILLER (snatching her from the ground with violence). Kneel to God, you howling fool, and not to villains since I must to prison any way! PRESIDENT (biting his lips.) You may be out in your reckoning, scoundrel! There are still gallows to spare! (To the officers.) Must I repeat my orders? [They approach LOUISA FERDINAND places himself before her. FERDINAND (fiercely). Touch her who dare! (He draws his sword and flourishes it.) Let no one presume to lay a finger on her, whose life is not well insured. (To the PRESIDENT.) As you value your own safety, father, urge me no further! PRESIDENT (to the officers in a threatening voice). At your peril, cowards! (They again attempt to seize LOUISA.) FERDINAND. Hell and furies! Back, I say! (Driving them away.) Once more, father, I warn you have some thought for your own safety! Drive me not to extremity! PRESIDENT (enraged to the officers). Scoundrels! Is this your obedience? (The officers renew their efforts.) FERDINAND. Well, if it must be so (attacking and wounding several of them), Justice forgive me! PRESIDENT (exasperated to the utmost). Let me see whether I, too, must feel your weapon! (He seizes LOUISA and delivers her to an officer.) FERDINAND (laughing bitterly). Father! father! Your conduct is a galling satire upon Providence, who has so ill understood her people as to make bad statesmen of excellent executioners! PRESIDENT (to the officers). Away with her! FERDINAND. Father, if I cannot prevent it, she must stand in the pillory but by her side will also stand the son of the president. Do you still insist? PRESIDENT. The more entertaining will be the exhibition. Away with her! FERDINAND. I will pledge the honor of an officer's sword for her. Do you still insist? PRESIDENT. Your sword is already familiar with disgrace. Away! away! You know my will. FERDINAND (wrests LOUISA from the officer and holds her with one arm, with the other points his sword at her bosom.) Father, rather than tamely see my wife branded with infamy I will plunge this sword into her bosom. Do you still insist? PRESIDENT. Do it, if the point be sharp enough! FERDINAND (releases LOUISA, and looks wildly towards heaven). Be thou witness, Almighty God, that I have left no human means untried to save her! Forgive me now if I have recourse to hellish means. While you are leading her to the pillory (speaking loudly in the PRESIDENT'S ear), I will publish throughout the town a pleasant history of how a president's chair may be gained! [Exit. PRESIDENT (as if thunder-struck). How? What said he? Ferdinand! Release her instantly! (Rushes after his son.) ACT III. SCENE I. Room at the President's. Enter PRESIDENT and WORM. PRESIDENT. That was an infernal piece of business! WORM. Just what I feared, your excellency. Opposition may inflame the enthusiast, but never converts him. PRESIDENT. I had placed my whole reliance upon the success of this attempt. I made no doubt but if the girl were once publicly disgraced, he would be obliged as an officer and a gentleman to resign her. WORM. An admirable idea! had you but succeeded in disgracing her. PRESIDENT. And yet when I reflect on the matter coolly I ought not to have suffered myself to be overawed. It was a threat which he never could have meant seriously. WORM. Be not too certain of that! There is no folly too gross for excited passion! You say that the baron has always looked upon government with an eye of disapprobation. I can readily believe it. The principles which he brought with him from college are ill-suited to our atmosphere. What have the fantastic visions of personal nobility and greatness of soul to do in court, where 'tis the perfection of wisdom to be great and little by turns, as occasion demands? The baron is too young and too fiery to take pleasure in the slow and crooked paths of intrigue. That alone can give impulse to his ambition which seems glorious and romantic! PRESIDENT (impatiently). But how will these sagacious remarks advance our affairs? WORM. They will point out to your excellency where the wound lies, and so, perhaps, help you to find a remedy. Such a character pardon the observation ought never to have been made a confidant, or should never have been roused to enmity. He detests the means by which you have risen to power! Perhaps it is only the son that has hitherto sealed the lips of the betrayer! Give him but a fair opportunity for throwing off the bonds imposed upon him by nature! only convince him, by unrelenting opposition to his passion, that you are no longer an affectionate father, and that moment the duties of a patriot will rush upon him with irresistible force! Nay, the high-wrought idea of offering so unparalleled a sacrifice at the shrine of justice might of itself alone have charms sufficient to reconcile him to the ruin of a parent! PRESIDENT. Worm! Worm! To what a horrible abyss do you lead me! WORM. Never fear, my lord, I will lead you back in safety! May I speak without restraint? PRESIDENT (throwing himself into a seat). Freely, as felon with felon. WORM. Forgive me, then. It seems to me that you have to ascribe all your influence as president to the courtly art of intrigue; why not resort to the same means for attaining your ends as a father? I well remember with what seeming frankness you invited your predecessor to a game at piquet, and caroused half the night with him over bumpers of Burgundy; and yet it was the same night on which the great mine you had planned to annihilate him was to explode. Why did you make a public exhibition of enmity to the major? You should by no means have let it appear that you knew anything of his love affair. You should have made the girl the object of your attacks and have preserved the affection of your son; like the prudent general who does not engage the prime of the enemy's force but creates disaffection among the ranks? PRESIDENT. How could this have been effected? WORM. In the simplest manner even now the game is not entirely lost! Forget for a time that you are a father. Do not contend against a passion which opposition only renders more formidable. Leave me to hatch, from the heat of their own passions, the basilisk which shall destroy them. PRESIDENT. I am all attention. WORM. Either my knowledge of human character is very small, or the major is as impetuous in jealousy as in love. Make him suspect the girl's constancy, whether probable or not does not signify. One grain of leaven will be enough to ferment the whole mass. PRESIDENT. But where shall we find that grain? WORM. Now, then, I come to the point. But first explain to me how much depends upon the major's compliance. How far is it of consequence that the romance with the music-master's daughter should be brought to a conclusion and the marriage with Lady Milford effected? PRESIDENT. How can you ask me, Worm? If the match with Lady Milford is broken off I stand a fair chance of losing my whole influence; on the other hand, if I force the major's consent, of losing my head. WORM (with animation). Now have the kindness to listen to me. The major must be entangled in a web. Your whole power must be employed against his mistress. We must make her write a love-letter, address it to a third party, and contrive to drop it cleverly in the way of the major. PRESIDENT. Absurd proposal! As if she would consent to sign her own death-warrant. WORM. She must do so if you will but let me follow my own plan. I know her gentle heart thoroughly; she has but two vulnerable sides by which her conscience can be attacked; they are her father and the major. The latter is entirely out of the question; we must, therefore, make the most of the musician. PRESIDENT. In what way? WORM. From the description your excellency gave me of what passed in his house nothing can be easier than to terrify the father with the threat of a criminal process. The person of his favorite, and of the keeper of the seals, is in some degree the representative of the duke himself, and he who offends the former is guilty of treason towards the latter. At any rate I will engage with these pretences to conjure up such a phantom as shall scare the poor devil out of his seven senses. PRESIDENT. But recollect, Worm, the affair must not be carried so far as to become serious. WORM. Nor shall it. It shall be carried no further than is necessary to frighten the family into our toils. The musician, therefore, must be quietly arrested. To make the necessity yet more urgent, we may also take possession of the mother; and then we begin to talk of criminal process, of the scaffold, and of imprisonment for life, and make the daughter's letter the sole condition of the parent's release. PRESIDENT. Excellent! Excellent! Now I begin to understand you! WORM. Louisa loves her father I might say even to adoration! The danger which threatens his life, or at least his freedom the reproaches of her conscience for being the cause of his misfortunes the impossibility of ever becoming the major's wife the confusion of her brain, which I take upon myself to produce all these considerations make our plan certain of success. She must be caught in the snare. PRESIDENT. But my son will he not instantly get scent of it? Will it not make him yet more desperate? WORM. Leave that to me, your excellency! The old folks shall not be set at liberty till they and their daughter have taken the most solemn oath to keep the whole transaction secret, and never to confess the deception. PRESIDENT. An oath! Ridiculous! What restraint can an oath be? WORM. None upon us, my lord, but the most binding upon people of their stamp. Observe, how dexterously by this measure we shall both reach the goal of our desires. The girl loses at once the affection of her lover, and her good name; the parents will lower their tone, and, thoroughly humbled by misfortune, will esteem it an act of mercy, if, by giving her my hand, I re-establish their daughter's reputation. PRESIDENT (shaking his head and smiling). Artful villain! I confess myself outdone no devil could spin a finer snare! The scholar excels his master. The next question is, to whom must the letter be addressed with whom to accuse her of having an intrigue? WORM. It must necessarily be some one who has all to gain or all to lose by your son's decision in this affair. PRESIDENT (after a moment's reflection). I can think of no one but the marshal. WORM (shrugs his shoulders). The marshal! He would certainly not be my choice were I Louisa Miller. PRESIDENT. And why not? What a strange notion! A man who dresses in the height of fashion who carries with him an atmosphere of eau de mille fleurs and musk who can garnish every silly speech with a handful of ducats could all this possibly fail to overcome the delicacy of a tradesman's daughter? No, no, my good friend, jealousy is not quite so hard of belief. I shall send for the marshal immediately. (Rings.) WORM. While your excellency takes care of him, and of the fiddler's arrest, I will go and indite the aforesaid letter. PRESIDENT (seats himself at his writing-table). Do so; and, as soon as it is ready, bring it hither for my perusal. [Exit WORM. [The PRESIDENT, having written, rises and hands the paper to a servant who enters. See this arrest executed without a moment's delay, and let Marshal von Kalb be informed that I wish to see him immediately. SERVANT. The marshal's carriage has just stopped at your lordship's door. PRESIDENT. So much the better as for the arrest, let it be managed with such precaution that no disturbance arise. SERVANT. I will take care, my lord. PRESIDENT. You understand me? The business must be kept quite secret. SERVANT. Your excellency shall be obeyed. [Exit SERVANT. SCENE II. The PRESIDENT MARSHALL KALB. MARSHAL (hastily). I have just looked in, en passant, my dear friend! How are you? How do you get on? We are to have the grand opera Dido to-night! Such a conflagration! a whole town will be in flames! you will come to the blaze of course eh? PRESIDENT. I have conflagration enough in my own house, one that threatens the destruction of all I possess. Be seated, my dear marshal. You arrive very opportunely to give me your advice and assistance in a certain business which will either advance our fortunes or utterly ruin us both! MARSHAL. Don't alarm me so, my dear friend! PRESIDENT. As I said before, it must exalt or ruin us entirely! You know my project respecting the major and Lady Milford you are not ignorant how necessary this union is to secure both our fortunes! Marshal, our plans threaten to come to naught. My son refuses to marry her! MARSHAL. Refuses! Refuses to marry her? But, my goodness! I have published the news through the whole town. The union is the general topic of conversation. PRESIDENT. Then you will be talked of by all the town as a spreader of false reports, in short, Ferdinand loves another. MARSHAL. Pooh! you are joking! As if that were an obstacle? PRESIDENT. With such an enthusiast a most insurmountable one! MARSHAL. Can he be mad enough to spurn his good-fortune? Eh? PRESIDENT. Ask him yourself and you'll hear what he will answer. MARSHAL. But, mon Dieu! what can he answer? PRESIDENT. That he will publish to the world the crime by which we rose to power that he will denounce our forged letters and receipts that he will send us both to the scaffold. That is what he can answer. MARSHAL. Are you out of your mind? PRESIDENT. Nay, that is what he has already answered? He was actually on the point of putting these threats into execution; and it was only by the most abject submission that I could persuade him to abandon his design. What say you to this, marshal? MARSHAL (with a look of bewildered stupidity). I am at my wits' end! PRESIDENT. That might have blown over. But my spies have just brought me notice that the grand cupbearer, von Bock, is on the point of offering himself as a suitor to her ladyship. MARSHAL. You drive me distracted! Whom did you say? Von Bock? Don't you know that we are mortal enemies? And don't you know why? PRESIDENT. The first word that I ever heard of it! MARSHAL. My dear count! You shall hear your hair will stand on end! You must remember the famous court ball it is now just twenty years ago. It was the first time that English country-dances were introduced you remember how the hot wax trickled from the great chandelier on Count Meerschaum's blue and silver domino. Surely, you cannot have forgotten that affair! PRESIDENT. Who could forget so remarkable a circumstance! MARSHAL. Well, then, in the heat of the dance Princess Amelia lost her garter. The whole ball, as you may imagine, was instantly thrown into confusion. Von Bock and myself we were then fellow-pages crept through the whole saloon in search of the garter. At length I discovered it. Von Bock perceives my good-fortune rushes forward tears it from my hands, and, just fancy presents it to the princess, and so cheated me of the honor I had so fortunately earned. What do you think of that? PRESIDENT. 'Twas most insolent! MARSHAL. I thought I should have fainted upon the spot. A trick so malicious was beyond the powers of mortal endurance. At length I recovered myself; and, approaching the princess, said, "Von Bock, 'tis true, was fortunate enough to present the garter to your highness; but he who first discovered that treasure finds his reward in silence, and is dumb!" PRESIDENT. Bravo, marshal! Admirably said! Most admirable! MARSHAL. And is dumb! But till the day of judgment will I remember his conduct the mean, sneaking sycophant! And as if that were not aggravation enough, he actually, as we were struggling on the ground for the garter, rubbed all the powder from one side of my peruke with his sleeve, and ruined me for the rest of the evening. PRESIDENT. This is the man who will marry Lady Milford, and consequently soon take the lead at court. MARSHAL. You plunge a dagger in my heart! But why must he? Why should he marry her? Why he? Where is the necessity? PRESIDENT. Because Ferdinand refuses her, and there is no other candidate. MARSHAL. But is there no possible method of obtaining your son's consent? Let the measure be ever so extravagant or desperate there is nothing to which I should not willingly consent in order to supplant the hated von Bock. PRESIDENT. I know but one means of accomplishing this, and that rests entirely with you. MARSHAL. With me? Name it, my dear count, name it! PRESIDENT. You must set Ferdinand and his mistress against each other. MARSHAL. Against each other? How do you mean? and how would that be possible. PRESIDENT. Everything is ours could we make him suspect the girl. MARSHAL. Ah, of theft, you mean? PRESIDENT. Pshaw! he would never believe that! No, no I mean that she is carrying on an intrigue with another. MARSHAL. And this other, who is he to be? PRESIDENT. Yourself! MARSHAL. How? Must I be her lover? Is she of noble birth? PRESIDENT. What signifies that? What an idea! she is the daughter of a musician. MARSHAL. A plebeian? that will never do! PRESIDENT. What will never do? Nonsense, man! Who in the name of wonder would think of asking a pair of rosy cheeks for their owner's pedigree? MARSHAL. But consider, my dear count, a married man! And my reputation at court! PRESIDENT. Oh! that's quite another thing! I beg a thousand pardons, marshal; I was not aware that a man of unblemished morals held a higher place in your estimation than a man of power! Let us break up our conference. MARSHAL. Be not so hasty, count. I did not mean to say that. PRESIDENT (coldly.) No no! You are perfectly right. I, too, am weary of office. I shall throw up the game, tender my resignation to the duke, and congratulate von Bock on his accession to the premiership. This duchy is not all the world. MARSHAL. And what am I to do? It is very fine for you to talk thus! You are a man of learning! But I mon Dieu! What shall I be if his highness dismisses me? PRESIDENT. A stale jest! a thing out of fashion! MARSHAL. I implore you, my dearest, my most valued friend. Abandon those thoughts. I will consent to everything! PRESIDENT. Will you lend your name to an assignation to which this Louisa Miller shall invite you in writing? MARSHAL. Well, in God's name let it be so! PRESIDENT. And drop the letter where the major cannot fail to find it. MARSHAL. For instance, on the parade, where I can let it fall as if accidentally in drawing out my handkerchief. PRESIDENT. And when the baron questions you will you assume the character of a favored rival? MARSHAL. Mort de ma vie! I'll teach him manners! I'll cure him of interfering in my amours! PRESIDENT. Good! Now you speak in the right key. The letter shall be written immediately! Come in the evening to receive it, and we will talk over the part you are to play. MARSHAL. I will be with you the instant I have paid sixteen visits of the very highest importance. Permit me, therefore, to take my leave without delay. (Going.) PRESIDENT (rings). I reckon upon your discretion, marshal. MARSHAL (calls back). Ah, mon Dieu! you know me! [Exit MARSHAL. SCENE III. The PRESIDENT and WORM. WORM. The music-master and his wife have been arrested without the least disturbance. Will your excellency read this letter? PRESIDENT (having read it). Excellent! Excellent, my dear secretary! poison like this would convert health itself into jaundiced leprosy. The marshal, too, has taken the bait. Now then away with my proposals to the father, and then lose no time with the daughter. [Exeunt on different sides. SCENE IV. Room in MILLER'S House. LOUISA and FERDINAND. LOUISA. Cease, I implore you! I expect no more days of happiness. All my hopes are levelled with the dust. FERDINAND. All mine are exalted to heaven! My father's passions are roused! He will direct his whole artillery against us! He will force me to become an unnatural son. I will not answer for my filial duty. Rage and despair will wring from me the dark secret that my father is an assassin! The son will deliver the parent into the hands of the executioner. This is a moment of extreme danger, and extreme danger alone could prompt my love to take so daring a leap! Hear me, Louisa! A thought, vast and immeasurable as my love, has arisen in my soul Thou, Louisa, and I, and Love! Lies not a whole heaven within this circle? Or dost thou feel that there is still something wanting? LOUISA. Oh! cease! No more! I tremble to think what you would say. FERDINAND. If we have no longer a claim upon the world, why should we seek its approbation? Why venture where nothing can be gained and all may be lost? Will thine eyes sparkle less brightly reflected by the Baltic waves than by the waters of the Rhine or the Elbe? Where Louise loves me there is my native land! Thy footsteps will make the wild and sandy desert far more attractive than the marble halls of my ancestors. Shall we miss the pomp of cities? Be we where we may, Louisa, a sun will rise and a sun will set scenes before which the most glorious achievements of art grow pale and dim! Though we serve God no more in his consecrated churches, yet the night shall spread her solemn shadows round us; the changing moon shall hear our confession, and a glorious congregation of stars join in our prayers! Think you our talk of love can ever be exhausted! Oh, no! One smile from Louisa were a theme for centuries the dream of life will be over ere I can exhaust the charms of a single tear. LOUISA. And hast thou no duty save that of love? FERDINAND (embracing her). None so sacred as thy peace of mind! LOUISA (very seriously). Cease, then, and leave me. I have a father who possesses no treasure save one only daughter. To-morrow he will be sixty years old that he will fall a victim to the vengeance of the President is most certain! FERDINAND (interrupting her). He shall accompany us. Therefore no more objections, my beloved. I will go and convert my valuables into gold, and raise money on my father's credit! It is lawful to plunder a robber, and are not his treasures the price for which he has sold his country? This night, when the clock strikes one, a carriage will stop at your door throw yourself into it, and we fly! LOUISA. Pursued by your father's curse! a curse, unthinking one, which is never pronounced in vain even by murderers which the avenging angel hears when uttered by a malefactor in his last agony which, like a fury, will fearfully pursue the fugitives from shore to shore! No, my beloved! If naught but a crime can preserve you to me, I still have courage to resign you! FERDINAND (mutters gloomily). Indeed! LOUISA. Resign you? Oh! horrible beyond all measure is the thought. Horrible enough to pierce the immortal spirit and pale the glowing cheeks of joy! Ferdinand! To resign you! Yet how can one resign what one never possessed? Your heart is the property of your station. My claim was sacrilege, and, shuddering, I withdraw it! FERDINAND (with convulsed features, and biting his underlip). You withdraw it! LOUISA. Nay! look upon me, dearest Ferdinand. Gnash not your teeth so bitterly! Come, let my example rouse your slumbering courage. Let me be the heroine of this moment. Let me restore to a father his lost son. I will renounce a union which would sever the bonds by which society is held together, and overthrow the landmarks of social order. I am the criminal. My bosom has nourished proud and foolish wishes, and my present misery is a just punishment. Oh! leave me then the sweet, the consoling idea that mine is the sacrifice. Canst thou deny me this last satisfaction? (FERDINAND, stupefied with agitation and anger, seizes a violin and strikes a few notes upon it; and then tears away the strings, dashes the instrument upon the ground, and, stamping it to pieces, bursts into a loud laugh.) Walter! God in Heaven! What mean you? Be not thus unmanned! This hour requires fortitude; it is the hour of separation! You have a heart, dear Walter; I know that heart warm as life is your love boundless and immeasurable bestow it on one more noble, more worthy she need not envy the most fortunate of her sex! (Striving to repress her tears.) You shall see me no more! Leave the vain disappointed girl to bewail her sorrow in sad and lonely seclusion; where her tears will flow unheeded. Dead and gone are all my hopes of happiness in this world; yet still shall I inhale ever and anon the perfumes of the faded wreath! (Giving him her trembling hand, while her face is turned away.) Baron Walter, farewell! FERDINAND (recovering from the stupor in which he was plunged). Louisa, I fly! Do you indeed refuse to follow me? LOUISA (who has retreated to the further end of the apartment, conceals her countenance with her hands). My duty bids me stay, and suffer. FERDINAND. Serpent! thou liest some other motive chains thee here! LOUISA (in a tone of the most heartfelt sorrow). Encourage that belief. Haply it may make our parting more supportable. FERDINAND. What? Oppose freezing duty to fiery love! And dost thou think to cheat me with that delusion? Some rival detains thee here, and woe be to thee and him should my suspicions be confirmed! [Exit. SCENE V. LOUISA (she remains for some time motionless in the seat upon which she has thrown herself. At length she rises, comes forward, and looks timidly around). Where can my parents be? My father promised to return in a few minutes; yet full five dreadful hours have passed since his departure. Should any accident good Heavens! What is come over me? Why does my heart palpitate so violently? (Here WORM enters, and remains standing unobserved in the background.) It can be nothing real. 'Tis but the terrible delusion of my over-heated blood. When once the soul is wrapped in terror the eye behold spectres in every shadow. SCENE VI. LOUISA and WORM. WORM (approaches her). Good evening, miss. LOUISA. Heavens! who speaks! (Perceives him, and starts back in terror.) Ha! Dreadful! dreadful! I fear some dire misfortune is even now realizing the forebodings of my soul! (To WORM, with a look of disdain.) Do you seek the president? he is no longer here. WORM. 'Tis you I seek, miss! LOUISA. I wonder, then, that you did not direct your steps towards the market-place. WORM. What should I do there? LOUISA. Release your betrothed from the pillory. WORM. Louisa, you cherish some false suspicion LOUISA (sharply interrupting him). What is your business with me? WORM. I come with a message from your father. LOUISA (agitated). From my father? Oh! Where is my father? WORM. Where he would fain not be! LOUISA. Quick, quick, for God's sake! Oh! my foreboding heart! Where is my father! WORM. In prison, if you needs must know! LOUISA (with a look towards heaven). This, too! This, too! In prison, said you? And why in prison? WORM. It is the duke's order. LOUISA. The duke's? WORM. Who thinking his own dignity offended by the insults offered to the person of his representative LOUISA. How? How? Oh ye Almighty Powers! WORM. Has resolved to inflict the most exemplary punishment. LOUISA. This was still wanting! This! Yes, in truth. I now feel that my heart does love another besides Ferdinand! That could not be allowed to escape! The prince's dignity offended? Heavenly Providence! Save, oh! save my sinking faith! (After a moment's pause, she turns to WORM.) And Ferdinand? WORM. Must choose between Lady Milford's hand and his father's curse and disinheritance. LOUISA. Terrible choice! and yet yet is he the happier of the two. He has no father to lose and yet to have none is misery enough! My father imprisoned for treason my Ferdinand compelled to choose between Lady Milford's hand or a parent's curse and disinheritance! Truly admirable! for even villany so perfect is perfection! Perfection? No! something is still wanting to complete that. Where is my mother? WORM. In the house of correction. LOUISA (with a smile of despair). Now the measure is full! It is full, and I am free released from all duties all sorrows all joys! Released even from Providence! I have nothing more to do with it! (A dreadful pause.) Have you aught else to communicate? Speak freely now I can hear anything with indifference. WORM. All that has happened you already know. LOUISA. But not that which is yet to happen! (Another pause, during which she surveys WORM from head to foot.) Unfortunate man! you have entered on a melancholy employment, which can never lead you to happiness. To cause misery to others is sad enough but to be the messenger of evil is horrible indeed to be the first to shriek the screech-owl's song, to stand by when the bleeding heart trembles upon the iron shaft of necessity, and the Christian doubts the existence of a God Heaven protect me! Wert thou paid a ton of gold for every tear of anguish which thou must witness, I would not be a wretch like thee! What is there yet to happen? WORM. I know not. LOUISA. You pretend not to know? This light-shunning embassy trembles at the sound of words, but the spectre betrays itself in your ghastly visage. What is there yet to happen? You said the duke will inflict upon him a most exemplary punishment. What call you exemplary? WORM. Ask me no more. LOUISA. Terrible man! Some hangman must have schooled thee! Else thou hast not so well learned to prolong the torture of thy victim before giving the finishing stroke to the agonized heart! Speak! What fate awaits my father? Death thou canst announce with a laughing sneer what then must that be which thou dost hesitate to disclose? Speak out! Let me at once receive the overwhelming weight of thy tidings! What fate awaits my father? WORM. A criminal process. LOUISA. But what is that? I am an ignorant, innocent girl, and understand but little of your fearful terms of law. What mean you by a criminal process? WORM. Judgment upon life or death. LOUISA (firmly). Ah! I thank you. [Exit hastily by a side door. WORM (alarmed). What means this? Should the simpleton perchance confusion! Surely she will not I must follow her. I am answerable for her life. (As he is going towards the door, LOUISA returns, wrapped in a cloak.) LOUISA. Your pardon, Mr. Secretary, I must lock the door. WORM. Whither in such haste? LOUISA (passing him). To the duke. WORM (alarmed, detains her). How? Whither? LOUISA. To the duke. Do you not hear? Even to that very duke whose will is to decide upon my father's life or death. Yet no? 'tis not his will that decides, but the will of wicked men who surround his throne. He lends naught to this process, save the shadow of his majesty, and his royal signature. WORM (with a burst of laughter). To the duke! LOUISA. I know the meaning of that sneering laugh you would tell me that I shall find no compassion there. But though I may meet (God preserve me!) with nothing but scorn scorn at my sorrows yet will I to the duke. I have been told that the great never know what misery is; that they fly from the knowledge of it. But I will teach the duke what misery is; I will paint to him, in all the writhing agonies of death, what misery is; I will cry aloud in wailings that shall creep through the very marrow of his bones, what misery is; and, while at my picture his hairs shall stand on end like quills upon the porcupine, will I shriek into his affrighted ear, that in the hour of death the sinews of these mighty gods of earth shall shrivel and shrink, and that at the day of judgment beggars and kings shall be weighed together in the same balance (Going.) WORM (ironically). By all means go to the duke! You can really do nothing more prudent; I advise you heartily to the step. Only go, and I give you my word that the duke will grant your suit. LOUISA (stopping suddenly). What said you? Do you yourself advise the step? (Returns hastily). What am I about to do? Something wicked surely, since this man approves it how know you that the prince will grant my suit? WORM. Because he will not have to grant it unrewarded. LOUISA. Not unrewarded? And what price does he set on his humanity? WORM. The person of the fair suppliant will be payment enough! LOUISA (stopping for a moment in mute dismay in a feeble voice). Almighty God! WORM. And I trust that you will not think your father's life over-valued when 'tis purchased at so gracious a price. LOUISA (with great indignation). True, oh! true! The great are entrenched from truth behind their own vices, safely as behind the swords of cherubim. The Almighty protect thee, father! Your child can die but not sin for thee. WORM. This will be agreeable news for the poor disconsolate old man. "My Louisa," says he, "has bowed me down to the earth; but my Louisa will raise me up again." I hasten to him with your answer. (Affects to be about to depart.) LOUISA (flies after him and holds him back). Stay! stay! one moment's patience! How nimble this Satan is, when his business is to drive humanity distracted! I have bowed him to the earth! I must raise him up again! Speak to me! Counsel me! What can I, what must I do? WORM. There is but one means of saving him! LOUISA. What is that means? WORM. And your father approves of it LOUISA. My father? Oh! name that means. WORM. It is easy for you to execute. LOUISA. I know of nothing harder than infamy! WORM. Suppose you were to release the major from his engagement? LOUISA. Release him! Do you mock me? Do you call that a choice to which force compelled me? WORM. You mistake me, dear girl! The major must resign you willingly, and be the first to retract his engagement. LOUISA. That he will never do. WORM. So it appears. Should we, do you think, have had recourse to you were it not that you alone are able to help us? LOUISA. I cannot compel him to hate me. WORM. We will try! Be seated. LOUISA (drawing back). Man! What is brooding in thy artful brain? WORM. Be seated. Here are paper, pens, and ink. Write what I dictate. LOUISA (sitting down in the greatest uneasiness). What must I write? To whom must I write? WORM. To your father's executioner. LOUISA. Ah! How well thou knowest to torture souls to thy purpose. (Takes a pen.) WORM (dictating to her). "My dear Sir (LOUISA writes with a trembling hand,) three days, three insupportable days, have already passed already passed since last we met." LOUISA (starts, and lays down her pen). To whom is the letter? WORM. To your father's executioner. LOUISA. Oh! my God! WORM. "But for this you must blame the major the major who watches me all day with the vigilance of an Argus." LOUISA (starting up). Villany! Villany beyond all precedent! To whom is the letter? WORM. To your father's executioner. LOUISA (paces to and fro, wringing her hands). No, no, no! This is tyrannical! Oh Heaven! If mortals provoke thee, punish them like mortals; but wherefore must I be placed between two precipices? Wherefore am I hurled by turns from death to infamy, from infamy to death? Wherefore is my neck made the footstool of this blood-sucking fiend? No; do what thou wilt, I will never write that! WORM (seizing his hat). As you please, miss! It rests entirely on your own pleasure! LOUISA. Pleasure, say'st thou? On my own pleasure? Go, barbarian! Suspend some unfortunate over the pit of hell; then make your demands, and ask your victim if it be his pleasure to grant your request! Oh! Thou knowest but too well that the bonds of nature bind our hearts as firmly as chains! But all is now alike indifferent. Dictate! I cease to think! Artifices of hell, I yield to ye! (She resumes her seat at the table.) WORM. "With the vigilance of an Argus." Have you written it? LOUISA. Proceed, proceed! WORM. "The president was here yesterday. It was amusing to see how warm the poor major was in defence of my honor." LOUISA. Excellent! Excellent! Oh! Admirable! Quick! quick, go on! WORM. "I had recourse to a swoon a swoon that I might not laugh aloud" LOUISA. Oh, Heavens! WORM. "But the mask which I have worn so long is becoming insupportable insupportable. Oh! if I could but rid myself of him." LOUISA (rises, and walks a few turns with her head bent down, as if she sought something upon the floor: then returns to her place, and continues to write). "Rid myself of him." WORM. "He will be on duty to-morrow observe when he leaves me, and hasten to the usual place." Have you written "the usual place?" LOUISA. Everything, everything! WORM. "To the usual place, to meet your devotedly attached Louisa." LOUISA. Now then, the address? WORM. "To Marshal von Kalb." LOUISA. Eternal Providence! A name as foreign to my ear as these scandalous lines are to my heart! (She rises, and for some moments surveys the writing with a vacant gaze. At length she hands it to WORM, speaking in a voice trembling and exhausted.) Take it, Sir! What I now put into your hands is my good name. It is Ferdinand it is the whole joy of my life! You have it, and now I am a beggar WORM. Oh! Not so! Despair not, dear girl! You inspire me with the most heartfelt pity! Perhaps who knows? I might even now overlook certain parts of your conduct yes! Heaven is my witness, how deeply I compassionate your sorrows! LOUISA (giving him a piercing look). Do not explain yourself! You are on the point of asking something more terrible than all. WORM (attempting to kiss her hand). What if I asked this little hand? Would that be terrible, Louisa? LOUISA (with great indignation). Yes! for I should strangle you on the bridal night: and for such a deed I would joyfully yield my body to be torn on the rack! (She is going, but comes hurriedly back.) Is all settled between us, sir? May the dove be released? WORM. A trifle yet remains, maiden! You must swear, by the holy sacrament, to acknowledge this letter for your free and voluntary act. LOUISA. Oh God! Oh God! And wilt thou grant thine own seal to confirm the works of hell? (WORM leads her away.) ACT IV. SCENE I. Saloon in the PRESIDENT'S House. FERDINAND VON WALTER enters in great excitement with an open letter in his hand, and is met by a SERVANT. FERDINAND. Is the marshal here? SERVANT. My lord, his highness the president is inquiring for you. FERDINAND. Fire and fury! I ask is the marshal here? SERVANT. His honor is engaged at the faro-table, above stairs. FERDINAND. Tell his honor, in the name of all the devils in hell, to make his appearance this instant! [Exit SERVANT. SCENE II. FERDINAND (hastily reading the letter, at one moment seeming petrified with astonishment, at the next pacing the room with fury). Impossible! quite impossible! A form so heavenly cannot hide so devilish a heart. And yet! and yet! Though all the angels of heaven should descend on earth and proclaim her innocence though heaven and earth, the Creator and the created, should, with one accord, vouch for her innocence it is her hand, her own hand! Treachery, monstrous, infernal treachery, such as humanity never before witnessed! This, then, was the reason she so resolutely opposed our flight! This it was Oh, God! Now I awake from my dream! Now the veil is lifted! This, then, is why she surrendered with so much seeming heroism her claims on my affection, and all but cheated me with her saint-like demeanor! (He traverses the chamber rapidly, and then remains for some moments in deep thought.) To fathom my heart to its very core! To reciprocate every lofty sentiment, every gentle emotion, every fiery ebullition! To sympathize with every secret breathing of my soul! To study me even in her tears! To mount with me to the sublimest heights of passion to brave with me, undaunted, each fearful precipice! God of heaven! And was all this deceit? mere grimace? Oh, if falsehood can assume so lovely an appearance of truth why has no devil yet lied himself back into heaven? When I unfolded to her the dangers which threatened our affection, with what convincing artifice did the false one turn pale! With what overpowering dignity did she repulse my father's licentious scoffs! yet at that very moment the deceiver was conscious of her guilt! Nay, did she not even undergo the fiery ordeal of truth? Forsooth, the hypocrite fainted! What must now be thy language, sensibility, since coquettes faint? How wilt thou vindicate thyself, innocence? for even strumpets faint? She knows her power over me she has seen through my very heart! My soul shone conspicuous in my eyes at the blush of her first kiss. And that she should have felt nothing! or perhaps felt only the triumph of her art; whilst my happy delirium fancied that in her I embraced a whole heaven, my wildest wishes were hushed! No thought but of her and eternity was present to my mind. Oh, God! and yet she felt nothing? Nothing? but that her artifice had triumphed! That her charms were flattered! Death and vengeance! Nothing, but that I was betrayed! SCENE III. FERDINAND, the MARSHAL. MARSHAL (tripping into the room). I am told, my dear baron, that you have expressed a wish FERDINAND (muttering to himself). To break your rascally neck. (Aloud.) Marshal, this letter must have dropped out of your pocket on parade. (With a malicious smile.) And I have been the fortunate finder. MARSHAL. You? FERDINAND. By a singular coincidence! Now, balance thy account with heaven! MARSHAL. You quite alarm me, baron! FERDINAND. Read it, sir, read it! (Turning from him.) If I am not good enough for a lover perhaps I may do for a pimp. (While the MARSHAL reads, FERDINAND goes to the wall and takes down the pistols.) KALB (throws the letter upon the table, and rushes off). Confusion! FERDINAND (leads him back by the arm). Wait a little, my dear marshal! The intelligence contained in that letter appears to be agreeable! The finder must have his reward. (Showing him the pistols.) MARSHAL (starts back in alarm). Have you lost your senses, baron? FERDINAND (in a terrible voice). I have more than enough left to rid the world of such a scoundrel as you! Choose one of these instantly! (He forces a pistol into the MARSHAL'S hand, and then draws out his handkerchief.) And now take the other end of this handkerchief! It was given me by the strumpet herself! MARSHAL. What, shoot over the handkerchief? Baron, are you mad? What can you be thinking of? FERDINAND. Lay hold of it, I say! or you will be sure to miss your aim, coward! How the coward trembles! You should thank God, you pitiful coward, that you have a chance for once of getting something in your empty brain-box. (The MARSHAL takes to his heels.) Gently, gently! I'll take care of that. (Overtakes him and bolts the door.) MARSHAL. Surely you will not fight in the chamber? FERDINAND. As if you were worth the trouble of a walk beyond the boundaries! The report, my dear fellow, will be louder, and, for the first time, you will make some noise in the world. Now, then, take hold! MARSHAL (wiping his forehead). Yet consider, I entreat. Would you risk your precious life, young and promising as you are, in this desperate manner? FERDINAND. Take hold, I say! I have nothing more to do in this world! MARSHAL. But I have much, my dearest, most excellent friend! FERDINAND. Thou, wretch thou? What hast thou to do, but to play the stop-gap, where honest men keep aloof! To stretch or shrink seven times in an instant, like the butterfly on a pin? To be privy registrar in chief and clerk of the jordan? To be the cap-and-bell buffoon on which your master sharpens his wit? Well, well, let it be so. I will carry you about with me, as I would a marmot of rare training. You shall skip and dance, like a tamed monkey, to the howling of the damned; fetch, carry, and serve; and with your courtly arts enliven the wailings of everlasting despair! MARSHAL. Anything you please, dear major! Whatever you please! Only take away the pistols! FERDINAND. How he stands there, poor trembling wretch! There he stands, a blot on the sixth day of creation. He looks as if he were a piratical counterfeit of the Almighty original. Pity, eternal pity! that an atom of brains should lie wasting in so barren a skull! That single atom bestowed upon a baboon might have made him a perfect man, whereas it is now a mere useless fragment. And that she should share her heart with a thing like this! Monstrous! Incredible! A wretch more formed to wean from sin than to excite it! MARSHAL. Praised be Heaven! he is getting witty. FERDINAND. I will let him live! That toleration which spares the caterpillar shall be extended to him! Men shall look on him in wonder, and, shrugging their shoulders, admire the wise dispensation of Providence, which can feed its creatures with husks and scourings; which spreads the table for the raven on the gallows, and for the courtier in the slime of majesty. We wonder at the wisdom of Providence, which even in the world of spirits maintains its staff of venomous reptiles for the dissemination of poison. (Relapsing into rage.) But such vermin shall not pollute my rose; sooner will I crush it to atoms (seizing the MARSHAL and shaking him roughly), thus and thus and thus MARSHAL. Oh! God, that I were away from here! hundreds of miles away in the asylum for maniacs at Paris! Anywhere but near this man! FERDINAND. Villain! If she be no longer pure! Villain! If thou hast profaned where I worshipped! (with increased fury). If thou hast polluted, where I believed myself the god! (Pausing suddenly; then in a solemn terrible voice.) It were better for thee, villain, to flee to hell, than to encounter my wrath in heaven! Confess! To what extent has your unhallowed love proceeded? MARSHAL. Let me go! I will confess everything. FERDINAND. Oh! it must be more rapturous even to be her licentious paramour than to burn with the purest flame for any other! Would she surrender her charms to unlicensed pleasure she might dissolve the soul itself to sin, and make voluptuousness pass for virtue (pressing his pistol against the MARSHAL'S breast). To what extremities have you proceeded? Confess this instant or I fire! MARSHAL. There is nothing at all in it, I assure you! There is not a syllable of truth in the whole business! Have but a moment's patience! You are deceived, indeed you are! FERDINAND (furiously). And dare you remind me of that, villain? To what extremities have you proceeded? Confess, or you are a dead man! MARSHAL. Mon Dieu! My God! You mistake my words! Only listen for a moment. When a father FERDINAND (still more enraged). No doubt! He threw his daughter into your arms? And how far have you proceeded? Confess, or I will murder you! MARSHAL. You rave! You will not listen! I never saw her! I don't know her! I know nothing at all about her! FERDINAND (drawing back). You never saw her? You don't know her? Know nothing at all about her? Louisa is lost to me forever on thy account, and yet in one breath hast thou denied her thrice. Go, wretch, go (he gives him a blow with the pistol, and thrusts him out of the chamber); powder were thrown away on such a miscreant. [Exit MARSHAL. SCENE IV. FERDINAND (after a long silence, during which his countenance declares him to be agitated by some dreadful idea). Forever lost? Yes, false unfortunate, both are lost! Ay, by the Almighty God! if I am lost, thou art so too. Judge of the world, ask her not from me! She is mine. For her sake I renounced the whole world abandoned all thy glorious creation. Leave me the maid, great Judge of the world! Millions of souls pour out their plaints to thee turn on them thine eye of compassion, but leave me, Almighty Judge leave me to myself. (Clasping his hands in agony.) Can the bountiful, the munificent Creator be covetous of one miserable soul, and that soul the worst of his creation? The maiden is mine! Once I was her god, but now I am her devil! (Fixes his eyes with terrible expression.) An eternity passed with her upon the rack of everlasting perdition! Her melting eye-balls riveted on mine! Our blazing locks entwined together! Our shrieks of agony dissolving into one! And then to renew to her my vows of love, and chant unceasingly her broken oaths! God! God! The union is dreadful and eternal! (As he is about to rush off, the PRESIDENT meets him.) SCENE V. FERDINAND, the PRESIDENT. FERDINAND (starting back). Ha! my father. PRESIDENT. I am glad to meet with you, Ferdinand! I come to bring you some pleasant news something that will certainly surprise you, my dear son. Shall we be seated? FERDINAND (after gazing upon him for some time with a vacant stare). My father! (Going to him with emotion, and grasping his hand.) My father! (Kissing it, and falling at his feet.) Oh, father! PRESIDENT. What is the matter? Rise, my son. Your hand burns and trembles! FERDINAND (wildly). Forgive my ingratitude, father! I am a lost man! I have misinterpreted your kindness! Your meaning was so truly truly paternal! Oh! you had a prophetic soul! Now it is too late! Pardon! pardon! Your blessing, my dear father! PRESIDENT (feigning astonishment). Arise, my son! Recollect that your words to me are riddles! FERDINAND. This Louisa, dear father! Oh! You understand mankind! Your anger was so just, so noble, so truly the zeal of a father! had not its very earnestness led you to mistake the way. This Louisa! PRESIDENT. Spare me, dear boy! Curses on my severity! come to entreat your forgiveness FERDINAND. Forgiveness from me! Curse me rather. Your disapproval was wisdom! Your severity was heavenly mercy! This Louisa, father PRESIDENT. Is a noble, a lovely girl! I recall my too rash suspicions! She has won my entire esteem! FERDINAND (starting up). What? You, too? Father, even you? And is she not, father, the very personification of innocence? And is it not so natural to love this maiden? PRESIDENT. Say, rather, 'twere a crime not to love her. FERDINAND. Incredible! wonderful! And you, too, who can so thoroughly see through the heart! And you, who saw her faults with the eyes of hatred! Oh, unexampled hypocrisy! This Louisa, father! PRESIDENT. Is worthy to be my daughter! Her virtues supply the want of ancestry, her beauty the want of fortune. My prudential maxims yield to the force of your attachment. Louisa shall be yours! FERDINAND. Naught but this wanting! Father, farewell! (Rushes out of the apartment.) PRESIDENT (following him). Stay, my son, stay! Whither do you fly? SCENE VI. A magnificent Saloon in LADY MILFORD'S House. Enter LADY MILFORD and SOPHIA. LADY MILFORD. You have seen her then? Will she come? SOPHIA. Yes, in a moment! She was in dishabille, and only requested time to change her dress. LADY MILFORD. Speak not of her. Silence! I tremble like a criminal at the prospect of beholding that fortunate woman whose heart sympathizes thus cruelly with my own. And how did she receive my invitation? SOPHIA. She seemed surprised, became thoughtful, fixed her eyes on me steadfastly, and for a while remained silent. I was already prepared for her excuses, when she returned me this answer with a look that quite astonished me; "Tell your mistress that she commands what I myself intended to request to-morrow." LADY MILFORD. Leave me, Sophia! Pity me! I must blush if she is but an ordinary woman despair if she is more! SOPHIA. But, my lady! it is not in this spirit that a rival should be received! Remember who you are! Summon to your aid your birth, your rank, your power! A prouder soul should heighten the gorgeous splendor of your appearance. LADY MILFORD (in a fit of absence). What is the simpleton babbling about? SOPHIA (maliciously). Or, is it, perhaps, by chance that to-day, in particular, you are adorned with your most costly brilliants? by chance that you are to-day arrayed in your most sumptuous robes? that your antechamber is crowded with guards and pages; and that the tradesman's daughter is to be received in the most stately apartment of the palace? LADY MILFORD (angry and nettled). This is outrageous! Insupportable! Oh that woman should have such argus-eyes for woman's weakness! How low, how irretrievably low must I have fallen when such a creature has power to fathom me! LADY MILFORD, SOPHIA, a SERVANT. SERVANT (entering). Ma'mselle Miller waits. LADY MILFORD (to SOPHIA). Hence with you! Leave the room instantly! (Imperiously, as the latter hesitates.) Must I repeat my orders? (SOPHIA retires LADY MILFORD takes a few turns hastily.) So; 'tis well that I have been excited! I am in the fitter mood for this meeting. (To the SERVANT.) Let her approach. [Exit SERVANT. LADY MILFORD throws herself upon the sofa, and assumes a negligent but studied attitude. SCENE VII. LADY MILFORD, LOUISA. LOUISA enters timidly, and remains standing at a great distance from LADY MILFORD, who has turned her back towards her, and for some time watches her attentively in the opposite looking-glass. After a pause - LOUISA. Noble lady, I await your commands. LADY MILFORD (turning towards LOUISA, and making a slight and distant motion with her head.) Oh! Are you there? I presume the young lady a certain . Pray what is your name? LOUISA (somewhat sensitively). My father's name is Miller. Your ladyship expressed a wish to see his daughter. LADY MILFORD. True, true! I remember. The poor musician's daughter, of whom we were speaking the other day. (Aside, after a pause.) Very interesting, but no beauty! (To LOUISA.) Come nearer, my child. (Again aside.) Eyes well practised in weeping. Oh! How I love those eyes! (Aloud.) Nearer come nearer! Quite close! I really think, my good child, that you are afraid of me! LOUISA (with firmness and dignity). No, my lady I despise the opinion of the multitude! LADY MILFORD (aside). Well, to be sure! She has learnt this boldness from him. (To LOUISA.) You have been recommended to me, miss! I am told that you have been decently educated, and are well disposed. I can readily believe it; besides, I would not, for the world, doubt the word of so warm an advocate. LOUISA. And yet I remember no one, my lady, who would be at the trouble to seek your ladyship's patronage for me! LADY MILFORD (significantly). Does that imply my unworthiness, or your humility? LOUISA. Your words are beyond my comprehension, lady. LADY MILFORD. More cunning than I should have expected from that open countenance. (To LOUISA.) Your name is Louisa, I believe? May I inquire your age? LOUISA. Sixteen, just turned. LADY MILFORD (starting up). Ha! There it is! Sixteen! The first pulsation of love! The first sweet vibration upon the yet unsounded harp! Nothing is more fascinating. (To LOUISA.) Be seated, lovely girl I am anxious about you. (To herself.) And he, too, loves for the first time! What wonder, if the ruddy morning beams should meet and blend? (To LOUISA, taking her hand affectionately.) 'Tis settled: I will make your fortune. (To herself.) Oh! there is nothing in it: nothing, but the sweet transient vision of youth! (To LOUISA, patting her on the cheek.) My Sophy is on the point of leaving me to be married: you shall have her place. But just sixteen? Oh! it can never last. LOUISA (kissing her hand respectfully). Receive my thanks, lady, for your intended favors, and believe me not the less grateful though I may decline to accept them. LADY MILFORD (relapsing into disdain and anger). Only hear the great lady! Girls of your station generally think themselves fortunate to obtain such promotion. What is your dependence, my dainty one? Are these fingers too delicate for work? or is it your pretty baby-face that makes you give yourself these airs? LOUISA. My face, lady, is as little of my own choice as my station! LADY MILFORD. Perhaps you believe that your beauty will last forever? Poor creature! Whoever put that into your head be he who he may has deceived both you and himself! The colors of those cheeks are not burnt in with fire: what your mirror passes off upon you as solid and enduring is but a slight tinselling, which, sooner or later, will rub off in the hands of the purchaser. What then, will you do? LOUISA. Pity the purchaser, lady, who bought a diamond because it appeared to be set in gold. LADY MILFORD (affecting not to hear her). A damsel of your age has ever two mirrors, the real one, and her admirer. The flattering complaisance of the latter counterbalances the rough honesty of the former. What the one proclaims frightful pock-marks, the other declares to be dimples that would adorn the Graces. The credulous maid believes only so much of the former as is confirmed by the latter, and hies from one to the other till she confounds their testimonies, and concludes by fancying them to be both of one opinion. Why do you stare at me so? LOUISA. Pardon me, lady! I was just then pitying those gorgeous sparkling brilliants, which are unconscious that their possessor is so strenuous a foe to vanity. LADY MILFORD (reddening). No evasion, miss. Were it not that you depend upon personal attractions, what in the world could induce you to reject a situation, the only one where you can acquire polish of manners and divest yourself of your plebeian prejudices? LOUISA. And with them, I presume, my plebeian innocence! LADY MILFORD. Preposterous objection! The most dissolute libertine dares not to disrespect our sex, unless we ourselves encourage him by advances. Prove what you are; make manifest your virtue and honor, and I will guarantee your innocence from danger. LOUISA. Of that, lady, permit me to entertain a doubt! The palaces of certain ladies are but too often made a theatre for the most unbridled licentiousness. Who will believe that a poor musician's daughter could have the heroism to plunge into the midst of contagion and yet preserve herself untainted? Who will believe that Lady Milford would perpetually hold a scorpion to her breast, and lavish her wealth to purchase the advantage of every moment feeling her cheeks dyed with the crimson blush of shame? I will be frank, lady! while I adorned you for some assignation, could you meet my eye unabashed? Could you endure my glance when you returned? Oh! better, far better, would it be that oceans should roll between us that we should inhabit different climes! Beware, my lady! hours of temperance, moments of satiety might intrude; the gnawing worm of remorse might plant its sting in your bosom, and then what a torment would it be for you to read in the countenance of your handmaid that calm serenity with which virtue ever rewards an uncorrupted heart! (Retiring a few steps.) Once more, gracious lady, I entreat your pardon! LADY MILFORD (extremely agitated). Insupportable, that she should tell me this! Still more insupportable, that what she tells is true! (Turning to LOUISA, and looking at her steadfastly.) Girl! girl! this artifice does not blind me. Mere opinions do not speak out so warmly. Beneath the cloak of these sentiments lurks some far dearer interest. 'Tis that which makes my service particularly distasteful which gives such energy to your language. (In a threatening voice.) What it is I am determined to discover. LOUISA (with calm dignity). And what if you do discover it? Suppose the contemptuous trampling of your foot should rouse the injured worm, which its Creator has furnished with a sting to protect it against misusage. I fear not your vengeance, lady! The poor criminal extended on the rack can look unappalled even on the dissolution of the world. My misery is so exquisite that even sincerity cannot draw down upon me any further infliction! (After a pause.) You say that you would raise me from the obscurity of my station. I will not examine the motives of this suspicious favor. I will only ask, what could induce you to think me so foolish as to blush at my station? What could induce you to become the architect of my happiness, before you knew whether I was willing to receive that happiness at your hands? I had forever renounced all claims upon the pleasures of the world. I had forgiven fortune that she had dealt with me so niggardly. Ah! why do you remind me of all this. If the Almighty himself hides his glory from the eyes of his creatures, lest the highest seraph should be overwhelmed by a sense of his own insignificance, why should mortals be so cruelly compassionate? Lady, lady! why is your vaunted happiness so anxious to excite the envy and wonder of the wretched? Does your bliss stand in need of the exhibition of despair for entertainment? Oh! rather grant me that blindness which alone can reconcile me to my barbarous lot! The insect feels itself as happy in a drop of water as though that drop was a paradise: so happy, and so contented! till some one tells it of a world of water, where navies ride and whales disport themselves! But you wish to make me happy, say you? (After a pause, she advances towards LADY MILFORD, and asks her suddenly.) Are you happy, lady? (LADY MILFORD turns from her hastily, and overpowered. LOUISA follows her, and lays her hand upon her bosom.) Does this heart wear the smile of its station? Could we now exchange breast for breast, and fate for fate were I, in childlike innocence, to ask you on your conscience were I to ask you as a mother would you really counsel me to make the exchange? LADY MILFORD (greatly excited, throwing herself on the sofa). Intolerable! Incomprehensible! No, Louisa, no! This greatness of thought is not your own, and your conceptions are too fiery, too full of youth, to be inspired by your father. Deceive me not! I detect another teacher LOUISA (looking piercingly at her). I cannot but wonder, my lady, that you should have only just discovered that other teacher, and yet have previously shown so much anxiety to patronize me! LADY MILFORD (starting up). 'Tis not to be borne! Well, then, since I cannot escape you, I know him know everything know more than I wish to know! (Suddenly restraining herself, then continuing with a violence which by degrees increases to frenzy.) But dare, unhappy one! dare but still to love, or be beloved by him! What did I say? Dare but to think of him, or to be one of his thoughts! I am powerful, unhappy one! dreadful in my vengeance! As sure as there is a God in heaven thou art lost forever! LOUISA (undaunted). Past all redemption, my lady, the moment you succeed in compelling him to love you! LADY MILFORD. I understand you but I care not for his love! I will conquer this disgraceful passion. I will torture my own heart; but thine will I crush to atoms! Rocks and chasms will I hurl between you. I will rush, like a fury, into the heaven of your joys. My name shall affright your loves as a spectre scares an assassin. That young and blooming form in his embrace shall wither to a skeleton. I cannot be blest with him neither shalt thou. Know, wretched girl; that to blast the happiness of others is in itself a happiness! LOUISA. A happiness, my lady, which is already beyond your reach! Seek not to deceive your own heart! You are incapable of executing what you threaten! You are incapable of torturing a being who has done you no wrong but whose misfortune it is that her feelings have been sensible to impressions like your own. But I love you for these transports, my lady! LADY MILFORD (recovering herself). Where am I? What have I done? What sentiments have I betrayed? To whom have I betrayed them? Oh, Louisa, noble, great, divine soul, forgive the ravings of a maniac! Fear not, my child! I will not injure a hair of thy head! Name thy wishes! Ask what thou wilt! I will serve thee with all my power; I will be thy friend thy sister! Thou art poor; look (taking off her brilliants), I will sell these jewels sell my wardrobe my carriages and horses all shall be thine grant me but Ferdinand! LOUISA (draws back indignantly). Does she mock my despair? or is she really innocent of participation in that cruel deed? Ha! then I may yet assume the heroine, and make my surrender of him pass for a sacrifice! (Remains for a while absorbed in thought, then approaches LADY MILFORD, seizes her hand, and gazes on her with a fixed and significant look.) Take him, lady! I here voluntarily resign the man whom hellish arts have torn from my bleeding bosom! Perchance you know it not, my lady! but you have destroyed the paradise of two lovers; you have torn asunder two hearts which God had linked together; you have crushed a creature not less dear to him than yourself, and no less created for happiness; one by whom he was worshipped as sincerely as by you; but who, henceforth, will worship him no more. But the Almighty is ever open to receive the last groan of the trampled worm. He will not look on with indifference when creatures in his keeping are murdered. Now Ferdinand is yours. Take him, lady, take him! Rush into his arms! Drag him with you to the altar! But forget not that the spectre of a suicide will rush between you and the bridal kiss. God be merciful! No choice is left me! (Rushes out of the chamber.) SCENE VIII. LADY MILFORD alone, in extreme agitation, gazing on the door by which LOUISA left. At length she recovers from her stupor. LADY MILFORD. What was that? What preys so on my heart? What said the unhappy one? Still, O heaven, the dreadful, damning words ring in my ears! "Take him! Take him!" What should I take, unfortunate? the bequest of your dying groan the fearful legacy of your despair? Gracious heaven! am I then fallen so low? Am I so suddenly hurled from the towering throne of my pride that I greedily await what a beggar's generosity may throw me in the last struggle of death? "Take him! Take him!" And with what a tone was it uttered! with what a look! What! Amelia! is it for this thou hast overleaped the bounds of thy sex? For this didst thou vaunt the glorious title of a free-born Briton, that thy boasted edifice of honor might sink before the nobler soul of a despised and lowly maiden? No, proud unfortunate! No! Amelia Milford may blush for shame, but shall never be despised. I, too, have courage to resign. (She walks a few paces with a majestic gait.) Hide thyself, weak, suffering woman! Hence, ye sweet and golden dreams of love! Magnanimity alone be now my guide. These lovers are lost, or Amelia must withdraw her claim, and renounce the prince's heart. (After a pause, with animation.) It is determined! The dreadful obstacle is removed broken are the bonds which bound me to the duke torn from my bosom this raging passion. Virtue, into thy arms I throw myself. Receive thy repentant daughter. Ha! how happy do I feel! How suddenly relieved my heart, and how exalted! Glorious as the setting sun, will I this day descend from the pinnacle of my greatness; my grandeur shall expire with my love, and my own heart be the only sharer of my proud exile! (Going to her writing-table with a determined air.) It must be done at once now, on the spot before the recollection of Ferdinand renews the cruel conflict in my bosom! (She seats herself, and begins to write). SCENE IX. LADY MILFORD, an ATTENDANT, SOPHIA, afterwards the MARSHAL, and then SERVANTS. SERVANT. Marshal von Kalb is in the ante-chamber, and brings a message from his highness. LADY MILFORD (not hearing him in the eagerness of writing). How the illustrious puppet will stare! The idea is singular enough, I own, the presuming to astonish his serene numskull. In what confusion will his court be thrown! The whole country will be in a ferment. SERVANT and SOPHIA. Marshal von Kalb, my lady! LADY MILFORD (turning round). Who? the marshal? So much the better! Such creatures were designed by nature to carry the ass' panniers. [Exit SERVANT. SOPHIA (approaching anxiously). If I were not fearful, my lady, that you would think it presumption. (LADY MILFORD continuing to write eagerly.) Louisa Miller rushed madly to the hall you are agitated you speak to yourself. (LADY MILFORD continues writing.) I am quite alarmed. What can have happened? (The MARSHAL enters, making repeated bows at LADY MILFORD'S back; as she takes no notice of him, he comes nearer, stands behind her chair, touches the hem of her dress, and imprints a kiss on it, saying in a tremulous voice.) His serene highness LADY MILFORD (while she peruses hastily what she has written). He will tax me with black ingratitude! "I was poor and forsaken! He raised me from misery! From misery." Detestable exchange! Annul my bond, seducer! The blush of my eternal shame repays my debt with interest. MARSHAL (after endeavoring in vain to catch her eye). Your ladyship seems somewhat absent. I take the liberty of permitting myself the boldness (very loud) his serene highness, my lady, has sent me to inquire whether you mean to honor this evening's gala with your presence, or the theatre? LADY MILFORD (rising, with a laugh). One or the other, sweet sir. In the meantime take this paper to your duke for his dessert. (To SOPHIA.) Do you, Sophia, give directions to have my carriage brought to the door without delay, and call my whole household together in this saloon. SOPHIA (goes out in great astonishment). Heavens! What do I forebode? What will this end in? MARSHAL. You seem excited, my lady! LADY MILFORD. The greater the chance of my letting you into a little truth. Rejoice, my Lord Marshal! There is a place vacant at court. A fine time for panders. (As the MARSHAL throws a look of suspicion upon the paper.) Read it, read it! 'Tis my desire that the contents should be made public. (While he reads it, the domestics enter, and range themselves in the background.) MARSHAL (reading). "Your highness an engagement, broken by you so lightly, can no longer be binding on me. The happiness of your subjects was the condition of my love. For three years the deception has lasted. The veil at length falls from my eyes! I look with disgust on favors which are stained with the tears of your subjects. Bestow the love which I can no longer accept upon your weeping country, and learn from a British princess compassion to your German people. Within an hour I shall have quitted your dominions. JOANNA NORFOLK" SERVANTS (exclaiming to each other in astonishment). Quitted the dominions! MARSHAL (replaces the letter upon the table in terror). God forbid, my dear and most excellent lady! The bearer of such a letter would be as mad as the writer! LADY MILFORD. That is your concern, you pink of a courtier! Alas! I am sorry to know that you, and such as you, would choke even in the utterance of what others dare to do. My advice is that you bake the letter in a venison pasty, so that his most serene highness may find it on his plate! MARSHAL. God preserve me! What presumption! Ponder well, I entreat you. Reflect on the disgrace which you will bring down upon yourself, my lady! LADY MILFORD (turning to the assembled domestics, and addressing them in the deepest emotion). You seem amazed, good people; and anxiously awaiting the solution of this riddle? Draw nearer, my friends! You have served me truly and affectionately; have looked into my eyes rather than my purse. My pleasure was your study, my approbation your pride! Woe is me, that the remembrance of your fidelity must be the record of my unworthiness! Unhappy fate, that the darkest season of my life should have been the brightest of yours! (Her eyes suffused with tears.) We must part, my children. Lady Milford has ceased to exist, and Joanna of Norfolk is too poor to repay your love. What little wealth I have my treasurer will share among you. This palace belongs to the duke. The poorest of you will quit it far richer than his mistress! Farewell, my children! (She extends her hand, which they all in turn kiss, with marks of sorrow and affection.) I understand you, my good people! Farewell! forever farewell! (Struggling with her feelings.) I hear the carriage at the door. (She tears herself away, and is hurrying out when the MARSHAL arrests her progress.) How, now? Pitiful creature, art thou still there? MARSHAL (who all this while has been gazing in vacant astonishment at the letter). And must I be the person to put this letter into the most august hands of his most serene highness? LADY MILFORD. Pitiful creature, even thou! Thou must deliver into his most august hands, and convey to his most august ears, that, as I cannot go barefoot to Loretto, I will support myself by the labor of my hands, that I may be purified from the disgrace of having condescended to rule him. (She hurries off the rest silently disperse.) ACT V. SCENE I. Twilight; a room in MILLER'S house. LOUISA sits silent and motionless in a dark corner of the room, her head reclining upon her hand. After a long pause, MILLER enters with a lantern, the light of which he casts anxiously round the chamber, without observing LOUISA, he then puts his hat on the table, and sets down the lantern. LOUISA, MILLER. MILLER. She is not here either. No, she is not here! I have wandered through every street; I have sought her with every acquaintance; I have inquired at every door! No one has seen my child! (A silence of some moments.) Patience, poor unhappy father! Patience till morning; then perhaps the corpse of your only one may come floating to shore. Oh, God in heaven! What though my heart has hung too idolatrously upon this daughter, yet surely the punishment is severe! Heavenly Father! Surely it is severe! I will not murmur, Heavenly Father; but the punishment is indeed severe! (Throws himself sorrowfully into a chair.) LOUISA (without moving from her seat). Thou dost well, wretched old man! Learn betimes to lose. MILLER (starts up eagerly). Ah! art thou there, my child? Art thou there? But wherefore thus alone, and without a light? LOUISA. Yet am I not alone. When all things around me are dark and gloomy then have I the companionship which most I love. MILLER. God defend thee, my child! The worm of conscience alone wakes and watches with the owl; none shun the light but criminals and evil spirits. LOUISA. And eternity, father, which speaks to the soul in solitude! MILLER. Louisa, my child! What words are these? LOUISA (rises, and comes forward). I have fought a hard fight you know it, father! but God gave me the strength! The fight is over! Father, our sex is called timid and weak; believe it no more! We tremble at a spider, but the black monster, corruption, we hug to our arms in sport! This for your edification, father. Your Louisa is merry. MILLER. I had rather you wept. It would, please me better. LOUISA. How I will outwit him, father! How I shall cheat the tyrant! Love is more crafty than malice, and bolder he knew not that, the man of the unlucky star! Oh! they are cunning so long as they have but to do with the head; but when they have to grapple with the heart the villains are at fault. He thought to seal his treachery with an oath! Oaths, father, may bind the living, but death dissolves even the iron bonds of the sacrament! Ferdinand will learn to know his Louisa. Father, will you deliver this letter for me? Will you do me the kindness? MILLER. To whom, my child? LOUISA. Strange question! Infinitude and my heart together had not space enough for a single thought but of him. To whom else should I write? MILLER (anxiously). Hear me, Louisa! I must read this letter! LOUISA. As you please, father! but you will not understand it. The characters lie there like inanimate corpses, and live but for the eye of love. MILLER (reading). "You are betrayed, Ferdinand! An unparalleled piece of villany has dissolved the union of our hearts; but a dreadful vow binds my tongue, and your father has spies stationed upon every side. But, if thou hast courage, my beloved, I know a place where oaths no longer bind, and where spies cannot enter." (MILLER stops short, and gazes upon her steadfastly.) LOUISA. Why that earnest look, father? Read what follows. MILLER. "But thou must be fearless enough to wander through a gloomy path with no other guides than God and thy Louisa. Thou must have no companion but love; leave behind all thy hopes, all thy tumultuous wishes thou wilt need nothing on this journey but thy heart. Darest thou come; then set out as the bell tolls twelve from the Carmelite Tower. Dost thou fear; then erase from the vocabulary of thy sex's virtues the word courage, for a maiden will have put thee to shame." (MILLER lays down the letter and fixes his eyes upon the ground in deep sorrow. At length he turns to LOUISA, and says, in a low, broken voice) Daughter, where is that place? LOUISA. Don't you know it, father? Do you really not know it? 'Tis strange! I have described it unmistakably! Ferdinand will not fail to find it. MILLER. Pray speak plainer! LOUISA. I can think of no pleasing name for it just now! You must not be alarmed, father, if the name I give it has a terrible sound. That place, Oh! why has no lover invented a name for it! He would have chosen the softest, the sweetest that place, my dear father but you must not interrupt me that place is the grave! MILLER (staggering to a seat). Oh, God! LOUISA (hastens to him, and supports him). Nay, father, be not alarmed! These are but terrors which hover round an empty word! Take away the name and the grave will seem to be a bridal-bed over which Aurora spreads her golden canopy and spring strews her fairest flowers. None but a groaning sinner pictures death as a skeleton; to others he is a gentle, smiling boy, blooming as the god of love, but not so false a silent, ministering spirit who guides the exhausted pilgrim through the desert of eternity, unlocks for him the fairy palace of everlasting joy, invites him in with friendly smiles, and vanishes forever! MILLER. What meanest thou, my child? Surely, thou wilt not lay guilty hands on thine own life? LOUISA. Speak not thus, father! To quit a community from which I am already rejected, to fly voluntarily to a place from which I cannot much longer be absent, is that a sin? MILLER. Suicide is the most horrible of sins, my child. 'Tis the only one that can never he repented, since death arrives at the moment the crime is committed. LOUISA (stands motionless with horror). That is dreadful! But my death will not be so sudden, father. I will spring into the river, and while the waters are closing over me, cry to the Almighty for mercy and forgiveness! MILLER. That is to say, you will repent the theft as soon as the treasure is secure! Daughter! Daughter! beware how you mock your God when you most need his help! Oh! you have gone far, far astray! You have forgotten the worship of your Creator, and he has withdrawn his protecting hand from you! LOUISA. Is it, then, a crime to love, father? MILLER. So long as thou lovest God thou wilt never love man to idolatry. Thou hast bowed me down low, my only one! low! very low! perhaps to the grave! Yet will I not increase the sadness of thy heart. Daughter! I gave vent to my feelings as I entered. I thought myself alone! Thou hast overheard me! and why should I longer conceal the truth. Thou wert my idol! Hear me, Louisa, if there is yet room in thy heart for a father's feelings. Thou wert my all! Of thine own thou hast nothing more to lose, but I have my all at stake! My life depends on thee! My hairs are turning gray, Louisa; they show that the time is drawing nigh with me when fathers look for a return of the capital invested in the hearts of their children. Wilt thou defraud me of this, Louisa? Wilt thou away and bear with thee all the wealth of thy father? LOUISA (kissing his hand in the deepest emotion). No, father, no! I go from this world deeply in your debt, and will repay you with usury in the world to come. MILLER. Beware, my child, lest thy reckoning should be false! (very earnestly and solemnly). Art thou certain that we shall meet in that world to come? Lo! how the color fades from thy cheek! My child must feel that I can scarcely overtake her in that other world if she hurries there before me. (LOUISA throws herself shuddering into his arms, he clasps her warmly to his bosom, and continues in a tone of fervent adjuration.) Oh! Louisa! Louisa! Fallen, perhaps already lost, daughter! Treasure in thy heart the solemn counsels of a father! I cannot eternally watch over thee! I may snatch the dagger from thy hands; but thou canst let out life with a bodkin. I may remove poison from thy reach; but thou canst strangle thyself with a necklace. Louisa! Louisa! I can only warn thee. Wilt thou rush boldly forward till the perfidious phantom which lured thee on vanishes at the awful brink of eternity? Wilt thou dare approach the throne of the Omniscient with the lie on thy lips? "At thy call am I here, Creator!" while thy guilty eyes are in search only of their mortal idol! And when thou shalt see this perishable god of thine own creation, a worm like thee, writhing at the Almighty's feet; when thou shalt hear him in the awful moment give the lie to thy guilty daring, and blast thy delusive hopes of eternal mercy, which the wretch implores in vain for himself; what then! (Louder and more fervently), What, then, unhappy one? (He clasps her still closer to his bosom, and gazes upon her with wild and piercing looks; then suddenly disengages himself.) I can do no more! (Raising his right hand towards heaven.) Immortal Judge, I can do no more to save this soul from ruin! Louisa, do what thou wilt. Offer up a sacrifice at the altar of this idolized youth that shall make thy evil genius howl for transport and thy good angels forsake thee in despair. Go on! Heap sin upon sin, add to them this, the last, the heaviest, and, if the scale be still too light throw in my curse to complete the measure. Here is a knife; pierce thy own heart, and (weeping aloud and rushing away), and with it, thy father's! LOUISA (following and detaining him). Stay! stay! Oh! father, father! to think that affection should wound more cruelly than a tyrant's rage! What shall I? I cannot! what must I do? MILLER. If thy lover's kisses burn hotter than thy father's tears then die! LOUISA (after a violent internal struggle, firmly). Father! Here is my hand! I will God! God! what am I doing! What would I? father, I swear. Woe is me! Criminal that I am where'er I turn! Father, be it so! Ferdinand. God, look down upon the act! Thus I destroy the last memorial of him. (Tearing the letter.) MILLER (throwing himself in ecstasy upon her neck). There spoke my daughter! Look up, my child! Thou hast lost a lover, but thou hast made a father happy. (Embracing her, and alternately laughing and crying.) My child! my child! I was not worthy to live so blest a moment! God knows how I, poor miserable sinner, became possessed of such an angel! My Louisa! My paradise! Oh! I know but little of love; but that to rend its bonds must be a bitter grief I can well believe! LOUISA. But let us hasten from this place, my father! Let us fly from the city, where my companions scoff at me, and my good name is lost forever let us away, far away, from a spot where every object tells of my ruined happiness, let us fly if it be possible! MILLER. Whither thou wilt, my daughter! The bread of the Lord grows everywhere, and He will grant ears to listen to my music. Yes! we will fly and leave all behind. I will set the story of your sorrows to the lute, and sing of the daughter who rent her own heart to preserve her father's. We will beg with the ballad from door to door, and sweet will be the alms bestowed by the hand of weeping sympathy! SCENE II. The former; FERDINAND. LOUISA (who perceives him first, throws herself shrieking into MILLER'S arms). God! There he is! I am lost! MILLER. Who? Where? LOUISA (points, with averted face, to the MAJOR, and presses closer to her father). 'Tis he! 'Tis he! himself! Look round, father, look round! he comes to murder me! MILLER (perceives him and starts back). How, baron? You here? FERDINAND (approaches slowly, stands opposite to LOUISA, and fixes a stern and piercing look upon her. After a pause, he says). Stricken conscience, I thank thee! Thy confession is dreadful, but swift and true, and spares me the torment of an explanation! Good evening, Miller! MILLER. For God's sake! baron, what seek you? What brings you hither? What means this surprise? FERDINAND. I knew a time when the day was divided into seconds, when eagerness for my presence hung upon the weights of the tardy clock, and when every pulse-throb was counted until the moment of my coming. How is it that I now surprise? MILLER. Oh, leave us, leave us, baron! If but one spark of humanity still linger in your bosom; if you seek not utterly to destroy her whom you profess to love, fly from this house, stay not one moment longer. The blessing of God deserted us when your foot first crossed its threshold. You have brought misery under a roof where all before was joy and happiness. Are you not yet content? Do you seek to deepen the wound which your fatal passion has planted in the heart of my only child? FERDINAND. Strange father, I have come to bring joyful tidings to your daughter. MILLER. Perchance fresh hopes, to add to her despair. Away, away, thou messenger of ill! Thy looks belie thy words. FERDINAND. At length the goal of my hopes appears in view! Lady Milford, the most fearful obstacle to our love, has this moment fled the land. My father sanctions my choice. Fate grows weary of persecuting us, and our propitious stars now blaze in the ascendant I am come to fulfil my plighted troth, and to lead my bride to the altar. MILLER. Dost thou hear him, my child? Dost thou hear him mock at thy cheated hopes? Oh, truly, baron! It is so worthy of the deceiver to make a jest of his own crime! FERDINAND. You think I am jesting? By my honor I am not! My protestations are as true as the love of my Louisa, and I will keep them as sacred as she has kept her oaths. Nothing to me is more sacred. Can you still doubt? Still no joyful blush upon the cheek of my fair bride? 'Tis strange! Falsehood must needs be here the current coin, since truth finds so little credit. You mistrust my words, it seems? Then read this written testimony. (He throws LOUISA her letter to the MARSHAL. She opens it, and sinks upon the floor pale as death.) MILLER (not observing this). What can this mean, baron? I do not understand you. FERDINAND. (leads him to LOUISA). But your daughter has understood me well. MILLER (throws himself on his knees beside her). Oh, God! my child! FERDINAND. Pale as a corpse! 'Tis thus your daughter pleases me the best. Your demure and virtuous daughter was never half so lovely as with that deathlike paleness. The blast of the day of judgment, which strips the varnish from every lie, has wafted the painted colors from her cheek, or the juggler might have cheated even the angels of light. This is her fairest countenance. Now for the first time do I see it in its truth. Let me kiss it. (He approaches her.) MILLER. Back! Away, boy! Trifle not with a father's feelings. I could not defend her from your caresses, but I can from your insults. FERDINAND. What wouldst thou, old man? With thee I have naught to do. Engage not in a game so irrevocably lost. Or hast thou, too, been wiser than I thought? Hast thou employed the wisdom of thy sixty years in pandering to thy daughter's amours, and disgraced those hoary locks with the office of a pimp? Oh! if it be not so, wretched old man, then lay thyself down and die. There is still time. Thou mayest breathe by last in the sweet delusion, "I was a happy father!" Wait but a moment longer and thine own hand will dash to her infernal home this poisonous viper; thou wilt curse the gift, and him who gave it, and sink to the grave in blasphemy and despair. (To LOUISA.) Speak, wretched one, speak! Didst thou write this letter? MILLER (to LOUISA, impressively). For God's sake, daughter, forget not! forget not! LOUISA. Oh, father that letter! FERDINAND. Oh! that it should have fallen into the wrong hands. Now blessed be the accident! It has effected more than the most consummate prudence, and will at the day of judgment avail more than the united wisdom of sages. Accident, did I say? Oh! Providence directs, when a sparrow falls, why not when a devil is unmasked? But I will be answered! Didst thou write that letter? MILLER (to LOUISA, in a tone of entreaty). Be firm, my child, be firm! But a single "Yes," and all will be over. FERDINAND. Excellent! excellent! The father, too, is deceived! All, all are deceived by her! Look, how the perfidious one stands there; even her tongue refuses participation in her last lie. I adjure thee by that God so terrible and true didst thou write that letter? LOUISA (after a painful struggle, with firmness and decision). I did! FERDINAND (stands aghast). No! As my soul liveth, thou hast lied. Even innocence itself, when extended on the rack, confesses crime which it never committed I ask too passionately. Is it not so, Louisa? Thou didst but confess, because I asked passionately? LOUISA. I confessed the truth! FERDINAND. No, I tell thee! No! no! Thou didst not write that letter! It is not like thy hand! And, even though it were, why should it be more difficult to counterfeit a writing than to undo a heart? Tell me truly, Louisa! Yet no, no, do not! Thou mightest say yes again, and then I were lost forever. A lie, Louisa! A lie! Oh! if thou didst but know one now if thou wouldst utter it with that open angelic mien if thou wouldst but persuade mine ear and eye, though it should deceive my heart ever so monstrously! Oh, Louisa! Then might truth depart in the same breath depart from our creation, and the sacred cause itself henceforth bow her stiff neck to the courtly arts of deception. LOUISA. By the Almighty God! by Him who is so terrible and true! I did! FERDINAND (after a pause, with the expression of the most heartfelt sorrow). Woman! Woman! With what a face thou standest now before me! Offer Paradise with that look, and even in the regions of the damned thou wilt find no purchaser. Didst thou know what thou wert to me, Louisa? Impossible! No! thou knewest not that thou wert my all all! 'Tis a poor insignificant word! but eternity itself can scarcely circumscribe it. Within it systems of worlds can roll their mighty orbs. All! and to sport with it so wickedly. Oh, 'tis horrible. LOUISA. Baron von Walter, you have heard my confession! I have pronounced my own condemnation! Now go! Fly from a house where you have been so unhappy. FERDINAND. 'Tis well! 'tis well! You see I am calm; calm, too, they say, is the shuddering land through which the plague has swept. I am calm. Yet ere I go, Louisa, one more request! It shall be my last. My brain burns with fever! I need refreshment! Will you make me some lemonade? [Exit LOUISA. SCENE III. FERDINAND and MILLER. They both pace up and down without speaking, on opposite sides of the room, for some minutes. MILLER (standing still at length, and regarding the MAJOR with a sorrowful air). Dear baron, perhaps it may alleviate your distress to say that I feel for you most deeply. FERDINAND. Enough of this, Miller. (Silence again for some moments.) Miller, I forget what first brought me to your house. What was the occasion of it? MILLER. How, baron? Don't you remember? You came to take lessons on the flute. FERDINAND (suddenly). And I beheld his daughter! (Another pause.) You have not kept your faith with me, friend! You were to provide me with repose for my leisure hours; but you betrayed me and sold me scorpions. (Observing MILLER'S agitation.) Tremble not, good old man! (falling deeply affected on his neck) the fault was none of thine! MILLER (wiping his eyes). Heaven knows, it was not! FERDINAND (traversing the room, plunged in the most gloomy meditation). Strange! Oh! beyond conception strange, are the Almighty's dealings with us! How often do terrific weights hang upon slender, almost invisible threads! Did man but know that he should eat death in a particular apple! Hem! Could he but know that! (He walks a few more turns; then stops suddenly, and grasps MILLER'S hand with strong emotion.) Friend, I have paid dearly for thy lessons and thou, too, hast been no gainer perhaps mayst even lose thy all. (Quitting him dejectedly.) Unhappy flute-playing, would that it never entered my brain! MILLER (striving to repress his feelings). The lemonade is long in coming. I will inquire after it, if you will excuse me. FERDINAND. No hurry, dear Miller! (Muttering to himself.) At least to her father there is none. Stay here a moment. What was I about to ask you? Ay, I remember! Is Louisa your only daughter? Have you no other child? MILLER (warmly). I have no other, baron, and I wish for no other. That child is my only solace in this world, and on her have I embarked my whole stock of affection. FERDINAND (much agitated). Ha! Pray see for the drink, good Miller! [Exit MILLER. SCENE IV. FERDINAND alone. FERDINAND. His only child! Dost thou feel that, murderer? His only one! Murderer, didst thou hear, his only one? The man has nothing in God's wide world but his instrument and that only daughter! And wilt thou rob him of her? Rob him? Rob a beggar of his last pittance? Break the lame man's crutch, and cast the fragments at his feet? How? Have I the heart to do this? And when he hastens home, impatient to reckon in his daughter's smiles the whole sum of his happiness; and when he enters the chamber, and there lies the rose withered dead crushed his last, his only, his sustaining hope. Ha! And when he stands before her, and all nature looks on in breathless horror, while his vacant eye wanders hopelessly through the gloom of futurity, and seeks God, but finds him nowhere, and then returns disappointed and despairing! Great God! and has not my father, too, an only son? an only child, but not his only treasure. (After a pause.) Yet stay! What will the old man lose? She who could wantonly jest with the most sacred feelings of love, will she make a father happy? She cannot! She will not! And I deserve thanks for crushing this viper ere the parent feels its sting. SCENE V. MILLER returning, and FERDINAND. MILLER. You shall be served instantly, baron! The poor thing is sitting without, weeping as though her heart would break! Your drink will be mingled with her tears. FERDINAND. 'Twere well for her were it only with tears! We were speaking of my lessons, Miller. (Taking out a purse.) I remember that I am still in your debt. MILLER. How? What? Go along with you, baron! What do you take me for? There is time enough for payment. Do not put such an affront on me; we are not together for the last time, please God. FERDINAND. Who can tell? Take your money. It is for life or death. MILLER (laughing). Oh! for the matter of that, baron! As regards that I don't think I should run much risk with you! FERDINAND. You would run the greatest. Have you never heard that youths have died. That damsels and youths have died, the children of hope, the airy castles of their disappointed parents? What is safe from age and worms has often perished by a thunderbolt. Even your Louisa is not immortal. MILLER. God gave her to me. FERDINAND. Hear me! I say to you your Louisa is not immortal. That daughter is the apple of your eye; you hang upon her with your whole heart and soul. Be prudent, Miller! None but a desperate gamester stakes his all upon a single cast. The merchant would be called a madman who embarked his whole fortune in one ship. Think upon this, and remember that I warned you. But why do you not take your money? MILLER. How, baron, how? All that enormous purse? What can you be thinking of? FERDINAND. Upon my debt! There! (Throws a heavy purse on the table; some gold drops out.) I cannot hold the dross to eternity. MILLER (astonished). Mercy on us! what is this? The sound was not of silver! (Goes to the table and cries out in astonishment.) In heaven's name, baron, what means this? What are you about? You must be out of your mind! (Clasping his hands.) There it lies! or I am bewitched. 'Tis damnable! I feel it now; the beauteous, shining, glorious heap of gold! No, Satan, thou shalt not catch my soul with this! FERDINAND. Have you drunk old wine, or new, Miller? MILLER (violently). Death and furies! Look yourself, then. It is gold! FERDINAND. And what of that? MILLER. Let me implore you, baron! In the name of all the saints in heaven, I entreat you! It is gold! FERDINAND. An extraordinary thing, it must be admitted. MILLER (after a pause; addressing him with emotion). Noble sir, I am a plain, straightforward man do you wish to tempt me to some piece of knavery? for, heaven knows, that so much gold cannot be got honestly! FERDINAND (moved). Make yourself quite easy, dear Miller! You have well earned the money. God forbid that I should use it to the corruption of your conscience! MILLER (jumping about like a madman). It is mine, then! Mine indeed! Mine with the knowledge and consent of God! (Hastening to the door.) Daughter, wife, hurrah, come hither! (Returning.) But, for heaven's sake, how have I all at once deserved this awful treasure? How am I to earn it? How repay it, eh? FERDINAND. Not by your music lessons, Miller! With this gold do I pay you for (stops suddenly, and shudders) I pay you (after a pause, with emotion) for my three months' unhappy dream of your daughter! MILLER (taking his hand and pressing it affectionately). Most gracious sir! were you some poor and low-born citizen, and my daughter refused your love, I would pierce her heart with my own hands. (Returning to the gold in a sorrowful tone.) But then I shall have all, and you nothing and I should have to give up all this glorious heap again, eh? FERDINAND. Let not that thought distress you, friend. I am about to quit this country, and in that to which I am journeying such coin is not current. MILLER (still fixing his eyes in transport on the money). Mine, then, it remains? Mine? Yet it grieves me that you are going to leave us. Only just wait a little and you shall see how I'll come out! I'll hold up my head with the best of them. (Puts on his hat with an air, and struts up and down the room.) I'll give my lessons in the great concert-room, and won't I smoke away at the best puyke varinas and, when you catch me again fiddling at the penny-hop, may the devil take me! FERDINAND. Stay, Miller! Be silent, and gather up your gold. (Mysteriously.) Keep silence only for this one evening, and do me the favor henceforward to give no more music lessons. MILLER (still more vehemently grasping his hand, full of inward joy). And my daughter, baron! my daughter! (Letting go.) No, no! Money does not make the man whether I feed on vegetables or on partridges, enough is enough, and this coat will do very well as long as the sunbeams don't peep in at the elbows. To me money is mere dross. But my girl shall benefit by the blessing; whatever wish I can read in her eyes shall be gratified. FERDINAND (suddenly interrupting him). Oh! silence! silence! MILLER (still more warmly). And she shall learn to speak French like a born native, and to dance minuets, and to sing, so that people shall read of her in the newspapers; and she shall wear a cap like the judge's daughter, and a kidebarri [meaning, no doubt, Cul de Paris, a bustle], as they call it; and the fiddler's daughter shall be talked of for twenty miles round. FERDINAND. (seizing his hand in extreme agitation). No more! no more! For God's sake be silent! Be silent but for this one night; 'tis the only favor I ask of you. SCENE VI. LOUISA with a glass of lemonade; the former. LOUISA (her eyes swelled with weeping, and trembling voice, while she presents the glass to FERDINAND). Tell me, if it be not to your taste. FERDINAND (takes the glass, places it on the table, and turns to MILLER). Oh! I had almost forgotten! Good Miller, I have a request to make. Will you do me a little favor? MILLER. A thousand with pleasure! What are your commands? FERDINAND. My father will expect me at table. Unfortunately I am in very ill humor. 'Twould be insupportable to me just now to mix in society. Will you go to my father and excuse my absence? LOUISA (terrified, interrupts him hastily). Oh, let me go! MILLER. Am I to see the president himself? FERDINAND. Not himself. Give your message to one of the servants in the ante-chamber. Here is my watch as a credential that I sent you. I shall be here when you return. You will wait for an answer. LOUISA (very anxiously). Cannot I be the bearer of your message? FERDINAND (to MILLER, who is going). Stay one thing more! Here is a letter to my father, which I received this evening enclosed in one to myself. Perhaps on business of importance. You may as well deliver it at the same time. MILLER (going). Very well, baron! LOUISA (stopping him, and speaking in a tone of the most exquisite terror). But, dear father, I could do all this very well! Pray let me go! MILLER. It is night, my child! and you must not venture out alone! [Exit. FERDINAND. Light your father down, Louisa. (LOUISA takes a candle and follows MILLER. FERDINAND in the meantime approaches the table and throws poison into the lemonade). Yes! she must die! The higher powers look down, and nod their terrible assent. The vengeance of heaven subscribes to my decree. Her good angels forsake her, and leave her to her fate! SCENE VII. FERDINAND and LOUISA. LOUISA re-enters slowly with the light, places it on the table, and stops on the opposite side of the room, her eyes fixed on the ground, except when she raises them to him with timid, stolen glances. He stands opposite, looking steadfastly on the earth a long and deep silence. LOUISA. If you will accompany me, Baron von Walter, I will try a piece on the harpsichord! (She opens the instrument. FERDINAND makes no answer. A pause.) LOUISA. You owe me a revenge at chess. Will you play a game with me, Baron von Walter? (Another pause.) LOUISA. I have begun the pocketbook, baron, which I promised to embroider for you. Will you look at the design? (Still a pause.) LOUISA. Oh! I am very wretched! FERDINAND (without changing his attitude). That may well be! LOUISA. It is not my fault, Baron von Walter, that you are so badly entertained! FERDINAND (with an insulting laugh). You are not to blame for my bashful modesty LOUISA. I am quite aware that we are no longer fit companions. I confess that I was terrified when you sent away my father. I believe, Baron von Walter, that this moment is equally insupportable to us both. Permit me to ask some of my acquaintances to join us. FERDINAND. Yes, pray do so! And I too will go and invite some of mine. LOUISA (looking at him with surprise). Baron von Walter! FERDINAND (very spitefully). By my honor, the most fortunate idea that in our situation could ever enter mortal brain? Let us change this wearisome duet into sport and merriment, and by the aid of certain gallantries, revenge ourselves on the caprices of love. LOUISA. You are merry, Baron von Walter! FERDINAND. Oh! wonderfully so! The very street-boys would hunt me through the market-place for a merry-andrew! In fact, Louisa, your example has inspired me you shall be my teacher. They are fools who prate of endless affection never-ending sameness grows flat and insipid variety alone gives zest to pleasure. Have with you, Louisa, we are now of one mind. We will skip from amour to amour, whirl from vice to vice; you in one direction, I in another. Perhaps I may recover my lost tranquillity in some brothel. Perhaps, when our merry race is run, and we become two mouldering skeletons, chance again may bring us together with the most pleasing surprise, and we may, as in a melodrama, recognize each other by a common feature of disease that mother whom her children can never disavow. Then, perhaps, disgust and shame may create that union between us which could not be effected by the most tender love. LOUISA. Oh, Walter! Walter! Thou art already unhappy wilt thou deserve to be so? FERDINAND (muttering passionately through his teeth). Unhappy? Who told thee so? Woman, thou art too vile to have any feelings of thine own; how, then, canst thou judge of the feelings of others? Unhappy, did she say? ha! that word would call my anger from the grave! She knew that I must become unhappy. Death and damnation! she knew it, and yet betrayed me! Look to it, serpent! That was thy only chance of forgiveness. This confession has condemned thee. Till now I thought to palliate thy crime with thy simplicity, and in my contempt thou hadst well nigh escaped my vengeance (seizing the glass hastily). Thou wert not thoughtless, then thou wert not simple thou wert nor more nor less than a devil! (He drinks.) The drink is bad, like thy soul! Taste it! LOUISA. Oh, heavens! 'Twas not without reason that I dreaded this meeting. FERDINAND (imperiously). Drink! I say. [LOUISA, offended, takes the glass and drinks. The moment she raises the cup to her lips, FERDINAND turns away with a sudden paleness, and recedes to the further corner of the chamber.] LOUISA. The lemonade is good. FERDINAND (his face averted and shuddering.) Much good may it do thee! LOUISA (sets down the glass). Oh! could you but know, Walter, how cruelly you wrong me! FERDINAND. Indeed! LOUISA. A time will come, Walter FERDINAND (advancing). Oh! we have done with time. LOUISA. When the remembrance of this evening will lie heavy on your heart! FERDINAND (begins to walk to and fro more vehemently, and to become more agitated; he throws away his sash and sword.) Farewell the prince's service! LOUISA. My God! what mean you! FERDINAND. I am hot, and oppressed. I would be more at ease. LOUISA. Drink! drink! it will cool you. FERDINAND. That it will, most effectually. The strumpet, though, is kind-hearted! Ay, ay, so are they all! LOUISA (rushing into his arms with the deepest expression of love). That to thy Louisa, Ferdinand? FERDINAND (thrusting her from him). Away! away! Hence with those soft and melting eyes! they subdue me. Come to me, snake, in all thy monstrous terrors! Spring upon me, scorpion! Display thy hideous folds, and rear thy proud coils to heaven! Stand before my eyes, hateful as the abyss of hell e'er saw thee! but not in that angel form! Take any shape but that! 'Tis too late. I must crush thee like a viper, or despair! Mercy on thy soul! LOUISA. Oh! that it should come to this! FERDINAND (gazing on her). So fair a work of the heavenly artist! Who would believe it? Who can believe it? (Taking her hand and elevating it.) I will not arraign thy ordinations, oh! incomprehensible Creator! Yet wherefore didst thou pour thy poison into such beauteous vessels? Can crime inhabit so fair a region? Oh! 'tis strange! 'tis passing strange! LOUISA. To hear this, and yet be compelled to silence! FERDINAND. And that soft, melodious voice! How can broken chords discourse such harmony? (Gazing rapturously upon her figure.) All so lovely! so full of symmetry! so divinely perfect! Throughout the whole such signs that 'twas the favorite work of God! By heaven, as though all mankind had been created but to practise the Creator, ere he modelled this his masterpiece! And that the Almighty should have failed in the soul alone? Is it possible that this monstrous abortion of nature should have escaped as perfect? (Quitting her hastily.) Or did God see an angel's form rising beneath his chisel, and balance the error by giving her a heart wicked in proportion? LOUISA. Alas for this criminal wilfulness! Rather than confess his own rashness, he accuses the wisdom of heaven! FERDINAND (falls upon her neck, weeping bitterly). Yet once more, my Louisa! Yet once again, as on the day of our first kiss, when you faltered forth the name of Ferdinand, and the first endearing "Thou!" trembled on thy burning lips. Oh! a harvest of endless and unutterable joys seemed to me at that moment to be budding forth. There lay eternity like a bright May-day before our eyes; thousands of golden years, fair as brides, danced around our souls. Then was I so happy! Oh! Louisa! Louisa! Louisa! Why hast thou used me thus? LOUISA. Weep, Walter, weep! Your compassion will be more just towards me than your wrath. FERDINAND. You deceive yourself. These are not nature's tears! not that warm delicious dew which flows like balsam on the wounded soul, and drives the chilled current of feeling swiftly along its course. They are solitary ice-cold drops! the awful, eternal farewell of my love! (With fearful solemnity, laying his hand on her head.) They are tears for thy soul, Louisa! tears for the Deity, whose inexhaustible beneficence has here missed its aim, and whose noblest work is cast away thus wantonly. Oh methinks the whole universe should clothe itself in black, and weep at the fearful example now passing in its centre. 'Tis but a common sorrow when mortals fall and Paradise is lost; but, when the plague extends its ravages to angels, then should there be wailing throughout the whole creation! LOUISA. Drive me not to extremities, Walter. I have fortitude equal to most, but it must not be tried by a more than human test. Walter! one word, and then we part forever. A dreadful fatality has deranged the language of our hearts. Dared I unclose these lips, Walter, I could tell thee things! I could But cruel fate has alike fettered my tongue and my heart, and I must endure in silence, even though you revile me as a common strumpet. FERDINAND. Dost thou feel well, Louisa? LOUISA. Why that question? FERDINAND. It would grieve me shouldst thou be called hence with a lie upon thy lips. LOUISA. I implore you, Walter FERDINAND (in violent agitation). No! no! That revenge were too satanic! No! God forbid! I will not extend my anger beyond the grave! Louisa, didst thou love the marshal? Thou wilt leave this room no more! LOUISA (sitting down). Ask what you will. I shall give no answer. FERDINAND (in a solemn voice). Take heed for thy immortal soul! Louisa! Didst thou love the marshal? Thou wilt leave this room no more! LOUISA. I shall give no answer. FERDINAND (throwing himself on his knees before her in the deepest emotion). Louisa! Didst thou love the marshal? Before this light burns out thou wilt stand before the throne of God! LOUISA (starting from her seat in terror). Merciful Jesus! what was that? And I feel so ill! (She falls back into her chair.) FERDINAND. Already? Oh, woman, thou eternal paradox! thy delicate nerves can sport with crimes at which manhood trembles; yet one poor grain of arsenic destroys them utterly! LOUISA. Poison! poison! Oh! Almighty God! FERDINAND. I fear it is so! Thy lemonade was seasoned in hell! Thou hast pledged death in the draught! LOUISA. To die! To die! All-merciful God! Poison in my drink! And to die! Oh! have mercy on my soul, thou Father in heaven! FERDINAND. Ay, be that thy chief concern: I will join thee in that prayer. LOUISA. And my mother! My father, too! Saviour of the world! My poor forlorn father! Is there then no hope? And I so young, and yet no hope? And must I die so soon? FERDINAND. There is no hope! None! you are already doomed! But be calm. We shall journey together. LOUISA. Thou too, Ferdinand? Poison, Ferdinand! From thee! Oh! God forgive him! God of mercy, lay not this crime on him! FERDINAND. Look to your own account. I fear it stands but ill. LOUISA. Ferdinand! Ferdinand! Oh! I can be no longer silent. Death death absolves all oaths. Ferdinand! Heaven and earth contain nothing more unfortunate than thou! I die innocent, Ferdinand! FERDINAND (terrified). Ah! What do I hear? Would she rush into the presence of her Maker with a lie on her lips? LOUISA. I lie not! I do not lie! In my whole life I never lied but once! Ugh! what an icy shivering creeps through my veins! When I wrote that letter to the marshal. FERDINAND. Ha! That letter! Blessed be to God! Now I am myself again! LOUISA (her voice every moment becomes more indistinct. Her fingers tremble with a convulsive motion). That letter. Prepare yourself for a terrible disclosure! My hand wrote what my heart abhorred. It was dictated by your father! (Ferdinand stands like a statue petrified with horror. After a long silence, he falls upon the floor as if struck by lightning.) Oh! that sorrowful act! Ferdinand I was compelled forgive me thy Louisa would have preferred death but my father his life in danger! They were so crafty in their villany. FERDINAND (starting furiously from the ground). God be thanked! The poison spares me yet! (He seizes his sword.) LOUISA (growing weaker by degrees). Alas! what would you? He is thy father! FERDINAND (in the most ungovernable fury). A murderer the murderer of his son; he must along with us that the Judge of the world may pour his wrath on the guilty alone. (Hastening away). LOUISA. My dying Redeemer pardoned his murderers, may God pardon thee and thy father! (She dies.) FERDINAND (turns quickly round, and perceives her in the convulsions of death, throws himself distractedly on the body). Stay! stay! Fly not from me, angel of light! (Takes her hand, but lets it fall again instantly.) Cold! cold and damp! her soul has flown! (Starting up suddenly.) God of my Louisa! Mercy! Mercy for the most accursed of murderers! Such was her dying prayer! How fair, how lovely even in death! The pitying destroyer has touched gently on those heavenly features. That sweetness was no mask the hand of death even has not removed it! (After a pause.) But how is this? why do I feel nothing. Will the vigor of my youth save me? Thankless care! That shall it not. (He seizes the glass.) SCENE VIII. FERDINAND, the PRESIDENT, WORM, and SERVANTS, who all rush in alarm into the room. Afterwards MILLER, with a crowd, and OFFICERS of justice, who assemble in the background. PRESIDENT (an open letter in his hand). My son! what means this? I never can believe FERDINAND (throwing the glass at his feet). Convince thyself, murderer! (The PRESIDENT staggers back. All stand speechless. A dreadful pause.) PRESIDENT. My son! Why hast thou done this? FERDINAND (without looking at him). Why, to be sure I ought first to have asked the statesman whether the trick suited his cards. Admirably fine and skilful, I confess, was the scheme of jealousy to break the bond of our hearts! The calculation shows a master-mind; 'twas pity only that indignant love would not move on wires like thy wooden puppets. PRESIDENT (looking round the circle with rolling eyes). Is there no one here who weeps for a despairing father? MILLER (calling behind the scenes). Let me in! For God's sake, let me in! FERDINAND. She is now a saint in heaven! Her cause is in the hands of another! (He opens the door for MILLER, who rushes in, followed by officers of justice and a crowd of people.) MILLER (in the most dreadful alarm). My child! My child! Poison, they cry poison has been here! My daughter! Where art thou? FERDINAND (leading him between the PRESIDENT and LOUISA'S corpse). I am innocent. Thank this man for the deed. MILLER (throwing himself on the body). Oh, Jesus! FERDINAND. In few words, father! they begin to be precious to me. I have been robbed of my life by villanous artifice robbed of it by you! How I may stand with God I tremble to think, but a deliberate villain I have never been! Be my final judgment what it will, may it not fall on thee! But I have committed murder! (In a loud and fearful voice.) A murder whose weight thou canst not hope that I should drag alone before the judgment-seat of God. Here I solemnly bequeath to thee the heaviest, the bloodiest part; how thou mayst answer it be that thy care! (Leading him to LOUISA.) Here, barbarian! Feast thine eyes on the terrible fruits of thy intrigues! Upon this face thy name is inscribed in the convulsions of death, and will be registered by the destroying angel! May a form like this draw thy curtain when thou sleepest, and grasp thee with its clay-cold hand! May a form like this flit before thy soul when thou diest, and drive away thy expiring prayer for mercy! May a form like this stand by thy grave at the resurrection, and before the throne of God when he pronounces thy doom! (He faints, the servants receive him in their arms.) PRESIDENT (extending his arms convulsively towards heaven). Not from me, Judge of the world. Ask not these souls from me, but from him! (Pointing to WORM.) WORM (starting). From me? PRESIDENT. Accursed villain, from thee! From thee, Satan! Thou gavest the serpent's counsel! thine be the responsibility; their blood be not on my head, but on thine! WORM. On mine! on mine! (laughing hysterically.) Oh! Excellent! Now I understand the gratitude of devils. On mine, thou senseless villain! Was he my son? Was I thy master? Mine the responsibility? Ha! by this sight which freezes the very marrow in my bones! Mine it shall be! I will brave destruction, but thou shalt perish with me. Away! away! Cry murder in the streets! Awaken justice! Bind me, officers! Lead me hence! I will discover secrets which shall make the hearer's blood run cold. (Going.) PRESIDENT (detaining him). Surely, madman, thou wilt not dare? WORM (tapping him on the shoulder). I will, though, comrade, I will! I am mad, 'tis true; but my madness is thy work, and now I will act like a madman! Arm in arm with thee will I to the scaffold! Arm in arm with thee to hell! Oh! how it tickles my fancy, villain, to be damned with thee! (The officers carry him off.) MILLER (who has lain upon LOUISA'S corpse in silent anguish, starts suddenly up, and throws the purse before the MAJOR'S feet.) Poisoner, take back thy accursed gold! Didst thou think to purchase my child with it? (Rushes distractedly out of the chamber.) FERDINAND (in a voice scarcely audible). Follow him! He is desperate. The gold must be taken care of for his use; 'tis the dreadful acknowlegment of my debt to him. Louisa! I come! Farewell! On this altar let me breathe my last. PRESIDENT (recovering from his stupor). Ferdinand! my son! Not one last look for a despairing father? (FERDINAND is laid by the side of LOUISA.) FERDINAND. My last must sue to God for mercy on myself. PRESIDENT (falling down before him in the most dreadful agony). The Creator and the created abandon me! Not one last look to cheer me in the hour of death! (FERDINAND stretches out his trembling hand to him, and expires.) PRESIDENT (springing up). He forgave me! (To the OFFICERS.) Now, lead on, sirs! I am your prisoner. [Exit, followed by the OFFICERS; the curtain falls. Publication Date: May 21st 2008 https://www.bookrix.com/-bx.schiller
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-dakota-demps-sit-back-girl/
Dakota Demps Sit Back Girl!! to the world chapter 1 i cant believe Nick cheated on me again. like what the hell yo? this is going to be the last time he cheats on me like this. i swear im tired of his cheatin ass. i got out of the bed and turned on my Droid and called him. Nick: yo whats up ma? Me: really nick? what the hell is up wit you and all them hoes? huh? Nick: yo you need to chill iight? Me: what the hell you mean chill? you been cheating on me with all these hoes and shit and you gone tell me to chill. nigga plz. way the hell you at? Nick: Shit on my way to you right now to get some good loving and shit, chill with you. Me: are you fucking nuts? hell naw i dont want your stanking ass no more. dont even think bout coming to my fuckin house. you aint nuin but a dirty ass dog. so fuck you and lose my damn number bitch. Nick; yeah you was nuin but a hoe anyway. With that said he hung up in my face. i sat down on my bed and put my head in the palms of my hand. i began to cry my eyes out. after all i did for this man. he treated me like shit. like for real i'll do any and every thing for this nigga. He even tried to talk to my sister. what kind of man will do that. don't get me wronge now, i loved his ass. i jus dnt knw what to do anymore. i just cant deal with a cheatin ass man. he told me he was gone be faithful and all this bullshit. my fone rang 10 minutes later, it was my gurl brooke. i answerd the fone with an attitude. Me: hello! Brooke:gurl whats up with you? you sound pissed off. Me: i am. can you believe this nigga cheated om me again. Brooke: i told you he ain't shit! Me: i knew u was gone say that shit, but i love him. Brooke: well it seems like to me he dnt love you. Me: he do love me. Brooke: gurl him cheatin on you is not love! he aint nuin bt a pussy ass nigga. just wait till i see his ass. i swear imma kill him. you dnt need that nigga. na'veah you need a man thats gone treat you better than that. im your friend and i know whats best. Me: i understand Brooke! fuck him. he's out of my life now im done with him. Brooke: well gurl we needs to go out. you know get my ass drunk nd party like a rock star. i need a man tonite to! shieeeet my man at home aint doin rite. Me: hell yeah we aint been clubin in a while. Brooke: iight bout 8:30 i'll be there. make sure u wear something that would show ur ass off to the niggas gurl. Me: gurl you crazy! imma talk to you later. Brooke: ok gurl see you later! chapter 2 Brooke and I was on the dance floor shakin our asses. a guy came up behind me and started grinding on my ass. i popped my ass slowly on him. this gut grabbed my hips. i turned around to see his face. he was drop dead fine as hell. i smiled at him. he had this smirk on his face that said "i want you". i stopped dancing and looked at brooke who was grinding on some guy. i started to walk to the bar and the dude followed me. i sat down at the bar; he sat next to me. Man: so whats your name cutie. Me:i'm Ne'veah. Man: i,m tyron. Me: nice to meet you tyron. Tyron: nice to met you to Ne'Veah! you got some nice moves on the floor. Me: i got good moves in the bed too! I cant believe i jus said that and i just met him. Tyron:(LAUGH) did i really need to know that? Me: no you really didn'. idont know what mad me say that. Tyron: so when was the last time you had some? Me: uhhh i wheather keep that to myself. Tyron: oh so you can tell me that you're good in bed but you can't tell me when the last time you had some good dick. Tyron looked at me hard with so much lust in his eyes. i got up and was about to walk away from him. i felt hand grab me around my arm. i turned to see Tyron holding my arm. i snatched away from him. Me: what the hell is ur problem. back the fuc off me. Tyron: i'm ......i'm sorry! I looked at him and could see in his eyes that he didn't want me to walk away. I calmed down and sat back down at the bar. He sat down as well beside me. Me: ok listen, I didn't like where the conversation was going that's why i was about to leave. Tyron: I understand. I won't ask anymore questions you don't feel comfortable answering. Brooke was walkin towards me, and i could tell by the way she was walking that she was hella drunk. i shook my head at her. What the hell was wronge with this crazy chick. Brooke: omg I feel like getiin fucked tonite.(yellin out loudly)I sure they some sexy ass niggas out in this bitch tonite. Nene, you know i wish a nigga had a mandingo dick. Me: ok Brooke we about to go. you are drunk. Brooke: no i'm not! i'm ready to get my freak on. Me: Brooke chill out! Brooke: ok gurl damn. why you buggin? Me: becuase you are being an ass. Brooke: im ready for somebody to tapp this ass..Aye! Me: Brooke! Brooke walked away dancing and acting like a damn fool. That gurl there is just crazy, but i loved her ass to death. She was there wen i needed her, she was my shoulder to cry on and vise-versa. I looked at tyron who was smiling down at me. Me: what? Tyron: your friend is funny as hell. Me: No shes just drunk ass hell. Tyron: yea i see that. Soo....are you a single women or taken? Me: Ummm...I was in a relationship but we broke up today. He been cheating on me like it was nothing. He always came over just to fuck me. He told me he loved me and i believed every word. I fell in love with his ass and he treated me like i wasn't shit. i was blind and didn't see what was happening. You knw a girl can only take so much. We have a breaking point. Tyron: yea i understand. But im bout to head out of here. here's my number. fuck wit me if you can.. chapter 3 Tyron and i have been speandin alot of time together.He's a very sweet guy..he took me to the mall'took me on a couple of dates. and for the first time out of all the men i have been with i did n have to pay for the dates. Tonight Tyron is coming over for pizza and movie. i ordered the pizza.. 10 minutes later tyron was at the door..i let him in and gave him a hug. i snuggled my face into his sweet smellin neck. Tyron: whats up baby? Me: nothing much. i already ordered the pizza. Tyron: mmm what kind? Me: meat lovers! what movie did you get? Tyron: i had went to blockbusters nd got this movie called swim fan. Me: whats it about? Tyron: i dnt knw i just picked it up cuz the cover looked interesting. DING-DONG...the door bell rang... Tyron: i'll pay for it baby. go get some plates na cups. Me: ok! After we finished our pizza, we continued to watch the movie. then i fell asleep. i was awakin by being carried and laid on my bed. i opened my eyes and there was tyron plantin a kiss on my cheek. i smiled lookin up to him.. he kissed my lips sliding his tounge into my mouth.. i pulled him on top of me guiding him between my legs. he stared grinding between my legs. my pussy got soak nd wet. he started lickin nd suckin on my neck...a moan that i never heard came out of my mouth.. it was so loud that he grinder harder on me. Tyron: tell me that you want me. Me: i want you baby give it to me. Tyron: u got a condom baby. i shook my head and pointed to the bed stand. He got the condom and rolled it on...i took a look at his dick and i was suprised. it was a huge size. Tyron took off his cloths and slid inside of me. I gasped at his size fulling me up. He went slow and I dug my nails into his back. Me: give it to me harder. Tyron turned me around in doggy position, grabbin my neck and pumped his dick into me hard and fast. i moaned loud in pleasure. then he turned me back around puttin me on my back and thursted in me slow hitting my g-spot. I came over and over again. Tyron started goin fast again. Tyron: Damn baby, im bout to bust. He pulled out and nutted all on my stomach.i got up and ran to the bathroom and washed off my stomach. when i went back into the room Tyron was laid up in my bed. I gt into the bed next to him wrappin my arms around him. Me: that was good. Tyron: yea it was.I'm about to go ahead and go home. Me: nooo! i want u to stay with me! Tyron: i got work tomorrow. I tell you what.. I'll stay till you fall asleep. Publication Date: March 20th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-dakota22
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-rajeshlane-cheat-or-cheated-1/
Rajeshlane Cheat or Cheated Sweet Sin Keerneelu Versae lives in Fairlands with her parents. Last year she was doing her BE in an Engineering College. In the first year of her BE she came to meet a boy in the carpentry who helped her to complete the wood work. Whenever she came to see showed smile towards him. Very slowly day by day the smile extended as words and became friends. She shared her worries with him, asked help. SMS was a tool to her to share all the things with him; it carried all her thoughts, work of the day, feelings, needs, talks. She believed him than her parents because he was hearing everything as an innocent pet and advised her, talked her a lot politely. She was thinking he is the guide, philosopher and well-wisher. Her belief over him was getting stronger and stronger and she thought he is the remedy for all sorts of worries, so whenever there was a problem, loneliness and depression in mind she called him over the phone and shared and cried and pacified her mind. She felt as he is caring, sharing and true to her and thought he alone can give her peace. Outwardly they were friends but intuitively lovers. One day she got serious wound over her mind because of her father who made problem with her mother. Keerneelu called her friend and asked him to take away to talk about the problem. They went to Ercaud hills, were talking until the eve. The then week also the misunderstanding between father and mother raised. She wanted to share her weep on his shoulder and to take rest on his lap. Knowingly or unknowingly the feeling turned towards sex. When the things got over she could cry and he tried to convince her. She felt very sad about it and did not attend the class for three days and did not call him and couldn’t get sleep and eat. She got scare and called him over the phone and cried. As an echo he used ‘extremely sorry’. She begged and begged to marry and lead a happiest life. ‘Just it’s a mistake, forgive me please.. and the world may indict you and our family as wrong . So better abort it ’ The weep could block her heart. He advised her to take tablets to erase the evidence so did she in pain, as the only choice to avoid shame. She got that he is a cheat. But it was very late. She couldn’t forget the worst incident induced by care and feelings. Again she called him and conveyed I couldn’t erase the pain that I underwent, better let us be lovers and marry. As a chance he used her like a detained dog and left her. Now her each minute is haunted by guilt and fear and mostly committing suicide. She is suffering from pain, depression, sleeplessness and lack of hungry. Always she could weep and want to be lonely and getting the mind to die. She feels as unwanted, uncared and unloved and gets anger in her mental trauma. Text: rajeshlane All rights reserved. Publication Date: January 30th 2009 https://www.bookrix.com/-rajeshlane
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-zoey-stark-stupid-mistake/
Zoey stark Stupid Mistake Happy Birthday, Missy *Missy's P.O.V* Waking up on my birthday, my 18th birthday. Yeah, I am excited! I am 18 fucking years old. Oops excuse my french, . Well it's two o'clock and I really need to get ready because Dallas will be here soon to pick me up, then at about 7pm my friends are going to make me over and were going to my birthday party which Dallas insisted be at his house. I get up get in the shower wash up, I get out brush my teeth, brush my hair out and put on my robe along with my bra and undies. (Hahaha Undies) I blow dry my hair, get out what I am going to wear which was a black skirt that comes mid thigh with a white tank top and blue loose over the shoulder shirt that says 'Party Rock' in black letters, with my black stilletos. It took an hour or so to get all this and more done. In the end I was dressed in my outfit, with some clear rasberry lipgloss, black eyeliner, and some mascara on both bottom and top. I looked good if I do say so myself. I hear somebody knock at the door as soon as I was grabbing my phone to call Dallas I ran downstairs and brought my phone with me, I opened the door to find Dallas. "I was just fixing to call you, baby." I said. "Happy Birthday, again." He said winking at me. "Thank you." I said wrapping my arms around him pulling him inside and closing the door behind him. "I love you." He said grabbing me by my waist and kissing me. "I love you too." I said. "Let's go get something to eat." He said.  "Maybe, I don't wanna leave yet." I said kissing him."We should though. I want you to party at your party not eat." He said laughing a little. "But I don't wanna." I said giving him my best puppy dog face. "Awww, don't do that to me. You know I am horrible at saying no to your puppy dog face." He said. "Fine I will eat but tonight after the party if your not totally being a meanie and wanting to hang out with your friends then your going to be all mine." I said. "You know I don't mean to be mean, babe." He said. "Well, then don't try and be that way. For tonight I don't want you drinking at all." I said. Dallas doesn't drink like any other teen would because last time and his first time ever he ever dranked he got sent to jail. Which scared him enough to listen to me sometimes. I hate being like the controling girlfriend and all but if he gets around his friends they're going to persuade him to drank and I know it. "Okay, I promise I won't drink no more then 1 beer." He says."Please, don't drink tonight." I said giving him that puppy dog face again."Ok." He said kissing me."Thank you." I said. "Anything for my birthday girl." He said pulling me closer to him. "Anything?" I questioned that."Anything." He whispered in my ear."Let's go eat now." I said. And so we were off to eat. He ran to open my door for me on his truck making sure I was in he shut the door lightly but firm. Then he ran to his door in got in, as he was doing that I buckled up and turned on some music. I didn't know where he was taking me most likely one of my favorite places to eat. I turned on some music while we headed to the place I didn't want the ride to be too quiet or there most likely going to be a weird question popping up. Sorry, I am one of those people that try her hardest to avoid awkward situations. "Baby where did you want to go?" Dallas asked me turning down the music."You should already know where I want to go." I said teasing him. He smirked and just shook his head driving exactly where I wanted to go. "Outback it is then." He said driving into the entrance. I smiled and thought to myself I bet he knows exactly what to order too. "Yay." I said. He killed the engine taking his keys and putting them in his pocket. He got out and came and opened the door for me. "Thanks Baby." I said as I got out the truck giving him a small smile. He wrapped his arm around my waist as soon as I got out. He was very protective of me always thinking a guy was going to swoop in and steal me away from him. He was so adorable about that, I loved my protective boyfriend. "No problem." He said kissing my forehead. We walked in and the hostess was a girl, Dallas was completely clueless about the fact that she was flirting with him I just shook my head at the thought. She sat us down and we gave her our drink orders and she was just waiting there. "That's all we need for now." I said looking dead at her. She stalked away with a angry expression which was hilarious. Dallas chuckled making me laugh a little then he pulled me close to him in the booth which was sweet. "We could have just ordered you know. I know exactly what you want and I usually eat the same thing." He said. "Okay smarty lets put your knowledge to the test. Waitress." I yelled. She looked away which made me think yeah real mature lady your definitely not getting a tip. "Waitress." Dallas yelled which made her come straight over there. I just rolled my eyes. "We need some bread with two side ranches, a 12 piece mild hot wing basket with a bake potato that has nothing but cheese ranch and butter with bacon bits too. And just double that order." He said smiling a victory smile for getting the order right. "Is that all?" The waitress asked all flirty like. "Yeah that's all right, babe?" He turned to me asking."Yeah baby you got the order perfectly." I said smiling."Oh-kay then." She said carrying out the okay and then walked away. "Your so cute." Dallas said to me kissing my cheek. I slightly blushed and turned away."Even cuter when you blush like that." He said chuckling."Thanks baby. Your not too bad looking either." I said teasing him. He smiled and his cheeks got a little pink which was so cute, but I wasn't going to call him on it because he would get really embarrassed. "I cannot wait for tonight." He said. "Me either. I'm so excited to see what you got planned for my party." I said to him."Well, only the best for my everything." He said kissing me gently on my lips. "Awe baby, you're the best." I told him. The girl came up with our food at the time and put it down. She then left. We ate and talked some more and eventually though we had to leave and go home because he had to get the house ready still with the party. Which was fine by me, but I was going to miss him.   Party Time Home again. Friends coming over soon. I can't wait until then, I am so excited. Dallas isn't going to drink so maybe tonight is the 'the night'. I love Dallas and he's been very very understanding. I just love him. The only thing though that was really the problem in the beginning is that his brother Austin kissed me before well he left to boarding school. Yes I had a thing for Austin but he left and well what was I suppose to do? I wasn't going to do that, I couldn't. Dallas was there to comfort me and I guess one thing lead to another and we ended up falling in love with each other is wasn't my fault. Well I am going to take a nap before the party so yeah.  I heard knocking and yelling downstairs to find my three bestfriends Lanna, Tara, and Charlie. They push me upstair giggling no talking just giggling. The only thing they did was show me what I was going to wear which was this :                                                                        www.polyvore.com/party_night/set?... As I came out the bathroom with my hair done by Tara, make-up done by Lanna and my personal designer Char a.k.a Charlie had made me I was shocked at who looked at me in the mirror. The girl had my features but she made them so much mature. I looked amazing.  "You're so beautiful." They said in unison. I was freaking out at first but who cares I am 18 years old. I am going to live a little. The girls had rush to  get ready and as soon as they were done I we all looked picture perfect. My friends hurried to get ready and rushed me over to Dallas's. When we get there they run in with presents they got me while Dallas welcomes me with a kiss.  "I missedyou." He said grabbing me by the waist and pulling me inside and shutting the door in one swift movement. "I missed you too." I said wrapping my arms around him and kissing him. "Wanna go up to my room?" He asked. "Sure." I said following him up the stairs. We get to his room you won't believe it but it was clean. He planned this and I know it. He shut the door and turned to me wrapping his arms around my waist. I went along with it and wrapped my arms around his neck. He started kissing me and I just went along with it. He starts to kiss down my neck, which I know he's trying to find my sweet spot again. He found it before but really didn't notice. "Baby, what are you doing?" I asked."I was just giving my girlfriend some loving." He said innocently. "Oh, really now?" I said saracastically. "Yes. I know you don't want to do that." He said. "Thank you for understanding that too." I said kissing him. "I..." He was going to say something but he was cute short when someone knocked at the door. "Who is it?" He yelled. "Austin." Austin said. I know that voice from anywhere. It gave me chills everytime I heard it. Even though I use to have deep feelings for him now I can't stand sometimes how he looks at me or at Dallas. It just suck. They were never close so Dallas swears up and down that I wasn't the cause of them not being close. "What you want I am busy?" Dallas yelled through the door.  "Your guest are arriving." Austin said through the door. "Okay." Dallas yelled back. When Dallas knew Austin was gone he kissed me. "I'm sorry. Mom and Dad said that he has to be here." Dallas said to me. "It's okay." I said. "Let's go party." He said kissing me. I smiled and looked at him and just nodded my head okay. As I did that we left out his room, when I saw Austin I wasn't expecting to feel like I did, of course I missed him. Bu he had left me...so it wasn't my fault I moved on especially with his brother. I mean I hate that I fell in love with brothers but that's just how it happened.  Mistakes Happen I get downstair like 50 people all said 'Happy Birthday' and I just yelled thank you. I didn't feel like saying thank you to every single one of them. I get all the way down the stairs and I get pulled to the dance floor by my bestfriends. They are such crazies but I love them. We dance to the song I Just Came To Say Hello. Yeah, we love that song. I dance with them for three songs and thought maybe it was time to dance with my boyfriend especially when he walks up behind me kissing my neck and hugging me from behind. Then all of a sudden you know that song my Usher Oh My God yeah it came on and I went crazy, he had to dance with me. We had so much fun. Until someone came and got him and made him go to the kitchen. I needed to make sure he wasn't drinking. I saw someone offer him a beer he took it. I was mad, I told him no drinking. I walked up behind him.  "What are you doing?" I asked starring the beer down. "I swear I was not going to drink it. I was just holding it while one of my friends dance with their girlfriend. Baby, I promised you I am not going to go back on my promise." He said. "I believe you." I said. "Here he is now." Dallas said handing this tall blonde hair guy. "Thanks, man." the dude said. "No problem." He said to the guy. The guy walked off and when he did it just left me and Dallas. "I'm sorry." I said wrapping my arms around his neck. "It's okay. I know you were just trying to protect me and I know this is your birthday party and I promised that I wouldn't drink so I am not." He said wrapping his arms around me. I wrapped my arms around his neck. "I love you, Dallas." I said to him. "And I love you, Missy." He said kissing me gently on the lips. You know the song by Usher 'Climax' (A/N yeah I wouldn't recommend letting your young kids to listen to it Missy loves the song so yeah back to the story) it came on and me and Dallas were just all on each other we were literally were not going to let go of each other. When I was dancing with him something vibrated in his pants I think it was his phone. I reached in his pocket and got his phone out I was shocked to see who it was. Big Mistakes Start I was hurt even though I didn't know if it was like that. I looked at Dallas.  "Why is your ex-girlfriend calling you?" I asked him. "I don't know." He said. I could tell he was lying, so I answered the phone after going down stair in the basement where there is a chill out room. "Hello." I said. "Um, Hi. Is Dallas there?" His ex asked. "Yeah." I said. "Can I speak with him?" She asked.  "Why do you want to speak with him?" I asked.  "Because we didn't finish our conversation before." She said. I was getting really mad at that point.  "What conversation?" I asked.  "Then one about him breaking up with his girlfriend to be with me." She said flatly. "He's not going to leave me for you. Bye." I said hanging up on her. Dallas came and found me down there and the phone was sitting far away from me. I was too mad to cry.  "Baby, what's wrong?" He asked.  "Have you cheated on me?" I asked.  "No never." He said getting down on his knees in front of me.  "Why were you discussing about us breaking up with your ex-girlfriend?" I asked.  "I told her no. I would never leave you for her." He sighed and kept talking. "She won't stop calling me. I love you and I am not going to hurt you." He finished by taking my hands in his and kissed them. He got up and sat next to me.  "Did you ever kissed or messed around with her in the beginning of our relationship?" I asked I felt he has before.  "Yes.." He said while pulling me into his lap.  "Why?" I asked.  "It was when I found out you had a thing with my brother and I just was mad and I wanted to get back at you some how. I was jealous you could say." He said. I jumped out of his lap.  "That was way before us though. That was during the time we were together Dallas. We were a couple. We weren't when me and Austin had a thing. I can't believe this. Is that why the next day you came back and was okay with it? Because you got back at me and felt better about it." I asked.  "It still hurt. You were with my brother. I didn't do it because of that." He said. "No I will tell you why you did it. Because you felt guilty. You felt that maybe you forgive me that I would forgive you for what you did, but it doesn't work that way. You know I feel so bad still to this day that I was with your brother before you. And you know what I still have issues with people calling me weird mean words because of it. I loved you and trusted you. I don't think about the trust part at this moment." I said walking back upstairs. I went somewhere in one of the upstairs halls and fell to the floor and started to cry. No one was aloud up there unless they lived here and me of course. I heard someone coming upstairs I didn't care at the moment, I didn't care about any of it.  "Are you okay, Missy?" It was Austin.  "No, no I am not." I said.  "You wanna go talk about it?" He asked.  "Sure." I said. He held out his hand for me and when I took it it felt perfect with mine. What am I saying his brother is my boyfriend? We got to his room he came in and locked the door. I really didn't notice at first he sat in his huge chair and I sat on his bed.  "What happened?" He asked.  "I had a fight with Dallas." I said.  "You found out." He said looking down.  "You knew." I said more like a statement.  "Yeah, I was trying to tell you but you wouldn't return my text or calls." He said.  "Ugh..." I said.  "I want to kiss you." He said.  "What?" I asked shocked.  "I really want to kiss you right now." He said again.  "What about the fact your brother is my boyfriend?" I asked.  "I am drunk, that's my excuse. Yours, you were upset and you thought I was Dallas because it was dark." He said coming really close to me. I was standing up at that time.  "I don't know." I said.  "Don't think about it just go with it. If your heart tells you to stop then stop but if your head says stop then you don't stop." He said whispering it in my ear. He kissed me on my lips and my head was telling me to stop but not my heart. He kissed me down my jawline.  "What is it?" he asked. "This is going to be one stupid mistake I can see it now." i said.  "Maybe." he smirked and returned kissing me again. He kept kissing me and I kept kissing back, I can't believe I missed him. I still loved Austin I knew that somewhere in the bottom of my heart. Austin was my first love and I am not ashamed to admit that.  You Are My Girl *Austin's P.O.V.* I loved this girl I will always love her. I want her to be mine and mine only. It seems like everytime I try thought someone takes her from me. So, I am going to take advantage of this situation. I blame my little brother for cheating on my girl. She was comfortable that I was kissing her she was responding back too."I can't stop. Why can't I stop?" She was getting upset she didn't like the fact she fell in love with brothers."Because you still love me." I said kissing down her neck."Austin you know I will always love you. I just can't do this again." She said trying to stop me but she couldn't and she didn't want to either I knew her."C'mon Baby boo my brother doesn't deserve someone so sweet and beautiful like you." I said sitting down with her in my lap."Austin he might not but I shouldn't do this to him." She said laying her head on my shoulder."You admited it. You still love me. Don't think with your head when you should go with your heart." I said kissing her gently on the lips."Austin please, it least let me go talk to him before I make the decision of just dumping my whole relationship away." She said getting out of my lap, out of my grip, and out of my arms again stollen by my brother. She walked out the door as I followed a little distance away I watched my little brother make the biggest stupidest mistake of his life. He was kissing this girl I think her name was Lucie she was a silent girl at their old high school. "Dallas I can't believe you." Missy was yelling. "You know what go screw my brother that'll make this day complete." Dallas said drunk sounding. "It's my birthday. And all I wanted was you to stay sober and for me and YOU to be together at the end of the night." Missy said. "You know what. We are done I am sick of this wahh wahh. I am sick of being tied down by some controlling chick." Dallas said. He didn't say chick either. Lucie girl already was gone out of the way."Shut up your drunk Dallas." Missy said. "Don't tell me what to do." Dallas said coming towards her.  She looked as if she was about to cry. I came from around the corner where I was hiding."Don't be an ass Dallas. She's trying to help you out." I said to him coming towards them. Dallas head snapped towards my direction."S-see I-I knew s-something was going on between y'all. I-I'm just s-stupid, I am s-so glad I ch-cheated on you." Dallas had said while slurring it. He was so wasted. Before I knew it Dallas had passed out on to the floor falling. I grunted before picking him up and putting him in his room on his bed. Missy had followed behind me without saying a word. When we got in the room I was shocked to see what she was doing. She was changing into another outfit right in front of me.  This is what she had on http://www.polyvore.com/comfy/set?id=83174305  and she looked so good in it. I was in love with this girl and I won't ever forget what happened next.  "I love you, Austin. I always have and will." Missy said coming towards me kissing me deeply. "I love you too. Will you be mine again?" I asked her. She smiled and kissed me again. "Yes but I got to go dance with the girls and have fun till my birthday is over." She said smiling. "Okay well  I will be in my room when your ready to come back." I said smiling and walking to my room. All I could think was I finally got my girl back.  Dancing Time *Missy's P.O.V* After what I just did in there I could not smiling about getting Austin back. I missed him honestly and I knew I did. So I went back downstairs to do some dancing number with my friends we all had the same outfit on but there's were white.  "Ready Missy?" Tara asked me.  "Yeah let's do this." I said. And we did what we had been learning for the past week. We did the dougie, wop, donk, wobble, and freestyled all in one dance. I was so amazing. I danced for about an hour with all my friends we were just having so much fun. I didn't even notice I was drinking beer. Usually I hated the smell of it. But for some reason I let loose tonight and start to drink it. I danced and had fun while someone took pictures of everything. I was just having a blast. I picked up maybe my 6th beer and started chugging while walking up the stairs running into Charlie. "Hey, I think you've had enough to drink." Charlie tells me.  "W-why you say that?" I said stumbling down the upstairs hallway. "Because your stumbling for one." she said. She started leading me to Dallas's room where he was already passed out on his bed.  "Here sleep it off." She said putting me on Dallas's bed and leaving the room. I passed out. I forgot about me and Dallas wasn't together right then though to so I curled up next to him and snuggled close to him and fell right asleep.  Next Morning Waking up that next morning I couldn't remember a thing. Did I get drunk? No, I wouldn't have. I was in Dallas's bed, I was in another outfit I turned over towards Dallas wondering what in the hell happened last night? Dallas's etes opened when they he smiled seeing I was there. Just then I remembered that we took pictures last night so those should tell me what happened last night. Dallas leaned in and kissed me which I kissed back. Right then when I closed my eyes I had a flash back of last night seeing me and Dallas kissing downstairs in the chill area. I still wanted to know why I couldn't remember what happened last night?  "You okay?" Dallas asked pulling us closer.  "I don't know. Do you remember what happened last night?" I said.  "No, I don't actually that's weird. Do you?" He said with a puzzled look.  "No. Did you drink last night?" I asked. "No, I don't think so. I don't remember having one drink." He said.  "Dallas you don't think I drank last night it least no much?" I asked.  "No, baby. I doubt you did. You wanted us both sober for last night remember?" He said kissing me.  "Yeah, but did last night even happen?" I asked looking down seeing both of us are clothed.  "Honestly I don't remember, but I doubt it because we wouldn't be clothed right now if it did." He said.  "What if it did and we don't remember? Oh my gawsh what if I can't remember my first time?" I said getting upset.  "Baby listen I most surely we didn't I would have remmebered that." He said hugging and kissing me.  "I wish I could remember what happened last night." I said. "Me too." He said. I got out of his grip and fixed my hair in a side bun.  "C'mon ger up we got a house to clean and a backyard." I said going downstairs collecting trash on the stairs and on my way to the kitchen. I got to the kitchen my heart skipped a beat seeing Austin shirtless. My heart is just confuses me, I am happy with Dallas, but sometimes I miss Austin.  Publication Date: July 22nd 2013 https://www.bookrix.com/-zoey.stark
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-anonymous-lover-dirty-diana/
Anonymous Lover Dirty Diana To everyone who has been threw something in the lives. The Tea My mom died when I was twevle, she was high on crack when she killled herself and guess who would be the one who found her. I was in the sixith grade, when I came home from school to see my mother hanging there right in the door way, lifeless. She had slit her wirsts the amount of blood that was pouring out of her wrists made it look like a murdrer site. Being a child, coming home to give her mother her report card, then to find her dead like that didn't help with the nightmares I was already having.   After my mother death my dad became ten times worser than he already was, he beats me everday and blames me for my mother death. I could have lived with my mother sister but my father told her no, I needed to be with him, that's before he started to drink even more. Okay here's the scoop on my father he is a drug dealer not a really good one becasue he is alays giving way free stuff.   Life in Chicago is rough, especially when your from the south side of Chicago, you take even walk n=outside without the fear of being shot. Almost everyday their is a shooting or someone gets arrested just yesterday Pastor Thomas house got raided. Their is no one you can trust in Chiraq, the pastor selling drugs, the teachers aren't even teaching, kids aren't even in school their with their boyfriends and theier girlfirends.   I am so rude by the way my name is Diana, I am 15 years old and I am in the ninth grade, I go to the most ratchet school ever. I had the perfect naturaly tan skin,and I am Putero Rican, my hair is reaching my butt and it is black. All the black girls at a school hate on me becasue the wish they looked like me. Like I said my mom is dead, my dads a drunk and a drug dealer, sister is just like how my mo used to be and it scares me that oneday, one of her kids are going to find her dead. Me and her are the only children my dad have left my twin brothers were killed in a drive-by gang shooting last year. I know that it is not gang related becasue my brothers were to busy trying to make it out, to join at gang. The were in the car my dad just 'bought' them, but it turns out that my dad stole it, so long story short the were in a stolen tcar they didn't know was stolen, now their in a gang.   So really I have no one left my dad either going to get robbed and killed or drink self to death and my sister going to over-dose on crack. I baby sit in order to help out around the house with biils and other things we are going to need. I babysit for this rich couple in gold coast and they pay me really well, basicly right after school, I go to their house and I saved up about 2,000 dollars so far and I been babysitting for them since I was fourteen.    Saving money in this house is never easy, becasue everything I save my dad ends up stealing it. My mother sister is this be time lawyer and her husband is a big time music producer, they have kids my auntie always wanted some but her husband never did. They own an 20 million dollar mansion in gold coast and four others in Los Angeles, Miami, and New York, also 4 luxurish lofts in Houston, Atlanta, Maine, and another one in Chicago.   Their house has a totally of 20 bedrooms, 25 bathrooms and each bedroom was huge but not a big as the master bedroom. They all have a walk in closet and a huge bathroom, I have my own room their but I have not been going there lately.   Today, my dad is making me go because he is going to have company which means that he having his drug additiced friends over and her crack-head girlfriend. I sat on my twin size bed and pack my bags which I really didn't really need to bring anything because my auntie husband makes I get whatever I need and whatever I want.   "Diana, hurry up you're auntie is going to be here in like five mintues." My dad screamed from down the hall. I sighed and headed towards the door, I don't even want to go there, but its going to be a good thing  becasue I finally get to sleep in a califorina king bed. My room in my Aunties house is the second biggest room in the whole house, my closet is filled with Loubtions, Giusppe Zanotti, Chanel, Dior, Givenchy, Fendi and alot of more expensive desingers.   My room was black,gold,and white, those are my favorite colors including red and pink. I heared a car horn beep and I knew that it was my Auntie, I said bye to my dad and headed out the door. I climbed into the back seat and said "Hi" to my Aunt and her husband they returned with "Hey."   We drove to my Aunties house which took twenties mintues by the time we got to my Aunties house it was 6:36pm. As soon as I gt steped foot into the house I ran right up to my room and jumped onto my bed, I love how soft it was, instead of my rock hard bed at home. dd  I started rolling around on my egyptain cotton sheets, I gave my sheets a smell and breath in the sweet smell of Gain laurndy soap. Someone laughing brought my attettion to my room dooor which was being shut behind the person. I looked over to see my Auntie husband he came and stood in front of me, then kneeling down to where his face met mine. He started brushing my hair out of hair to behind my ear, staring me in my eyes, I tensed up on his touch. He started smiling and placed a kiss onto my cheek and then look me back in my eyes, pulling my hair hard "We are going to dinner tonight, so get pretty and be down stairs around 8 okay. Also you look beautiful, wear the outfit I bought you. No where fancy." He said that last part in a whisper while kissing my cheek again.   I smiled and said "okay." Before he left he stopped and patted me on top of head placing a kiss onto to it. As soon as he left I got up and got my remote to my t.v. I started wastching Degrassi until I looked at my Iphone 6 plus and it said 7:00pm so I decide to start getting ready. I walk to my closet to pick out my outfit, I had so many clothes to choice from.   Walking around my closet I found some white skinny jeans, a black v neck shirt, a black and gold north face hoodie with my Jordan retro grey 14's. I showered for 20 mintues, got and brushed my teeth, I pluged in my flat irons and went to go put on my clothes. Flating ironing my hair I heard someone enter my room, I kept flat ironig my hair, I looked in the mirror to see my Auntie standing there with an smirk on her face.   She had her hand behind her back, I turned around and smiled her. She started to talk" I have something for I been wanting to give it to you for a long time." "Okay." "This was your mother's." She said handing me a charm necklace. "You want me to have this, don't you want it."   She shookedher heead 'Yes' and then turned me around towards the mirror and place the necklace upon me. Kissing my check she walked away, I put on some light make up, and sprayed on some of my Chanel perfume. Walking back into my room, I heared someone clear their throat it was my Aunties maid and she told me that my Auntie was waiting on me at the front door,.   I ran down stairs, and saw the front door open so I walked outside and got into my Aunties Mercedes G-Wagon. We are going to eat at Applebees, as usually the said I can get what ever I wanted, I was hungry, really hungry due the fact I have not ate in about four days.    I just settled for the double crunch shrimp, and for an appetizers so hot wings, with an sprite. Our waiter was super hot, like four from divegrent hot, you can tell that he have a six pack from his shirt. His lips are so full and pink and delicious looking, I just waited to suck on them.   He was walking back over to bring us over drinks and I had a full view of his perfection. He is about 6'4, light skinned with tattoos(my type), and his teeth were perfect, that jaw line was to sharp I bet if you touch it it will cut your finger. I can feel someone staring at me, so I turned to see my Auntie grinning widely and moniting to tell me to look away. Just as did I felt someone kick me under the table and of course it was my Aunties husband.   I know alot of you are wondering why I don't call him uncle its becasue he could never ever be an uncle to me. The waiter put our drinks down and said he would be right back with our order, I decied to start an interseting converstaion with my Auntie about something that should spark her husband attettion. "If someone is doing something wrong to you and you know its wrong and they do to. What should you do about that?" I said looking down. "Why are you asking about that?" My Auntie asked in confusion "I just wanted to now. Like would do you tell, what do you say, and what if you have something that could be taken away if you tell." "Well, um you should tell anyway there is something that can be done. If they are doing something to you and you now its wrong and if you tell them you don't want it and then you done nothing wrong and you should always tell." "Um, mmm, Okay, so even if you tell, nothing will happen to you." "No its not your fault, its theirs, sweety nothing will hapen to you. Why are you wondering about this so much?" "I just wanted to know, I have this friend who's going threw something." Of course while I was talking to my Auntie I was getting death looks and hard kicks from my Auntie's husband, he didn't want his secert to be out.    Just as always he pulled it together and changed the subject. Fucking Rapsit Publication Date: April 22nd 2015 https://www.bookrix.com/-xq97fe7dceda055
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-nyasia-jones-the-clique-crew/
nyasia jones the clique crew drama this is to all the teens and young lil girls who think tht they can run sombody all the time but will eventually serve the consequences Text: nyasia` Images: nyasia Editing: nyasia Translation: nyasia All rights reserved. Publication Date: February 7th 2013 https://www.bookrix.com/-nyasialuvyhu01
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-kaila-carper-alphabet-slave/
Kaila Carper Alphabet Slave Authors Introduction I just wanted to take a moment and introduce the story along as myself. If none of you know who I am then that is perfetly fine. My name is Kaila, although I have a few different pennames. I wanted to take this time to talk about the following story. The story is almost finished as in I have it typed up on Microsoft Word. I am only going to be putting the first few chapters on here because of privacy reasons. The story itself is about a abused victim. How she copes with life after the "incident" so to say. The title will make sense once you read the story. The main character explains everything within the first paragraph or so. I am not saying what happened to her because as with any good mystery or drama the plot reveals itself over time. I do hope that you enjoy the story. I hope for positive reviews but of course I welcome any reviews. Now for those of you who are unaquainted with my writing style. As with most of my stories there are a lot of strange twists and turns. If there are any confusing parts with mispelled words or otherwise please note it for me to correct, or explain. I tend to write more along the horror genre because I am deeply fascinated by torture techniques and death. This however does not entitle you to ramble aimlessly on about random facts or quotes. Please keep the comments/reviews simple. If you have a seriously disturbing wish to know something you can message me. If not then well that is your problem. So please enjoy the story as much as you can. If you desperately want to know how it ends then tell me. *Oh and the main character does not mention her own name, that is done on purpose.* xWARNINGx Not suitable for young, naive children. Or weak minded adults. A for Anger It feels as though you never left. The books you lent me still sit on my shelf awaiting your return. Yet I know you will not come. You have left… you will not come back. All I have left are bitter memories and junk. I want to burn it all but every time I try my hands start to shake. What have you done to me? Where has that person gone? Your scent still lingers everywhere I go. It's like you never left but I know you are gone. No matter how I beg nothing will happen. I bet you didn’t know but I still have everything you gave me. I still have those pictures we took. I could not even shred them… What am I to do? Your very existence tortures me. If I was to get rid of you from this world could I live again? Would I be able to breath freely and talk clearly? No it would make it worse. Because I would know that one day I would still be confronted by you. Its not that you ran away… it was me who ran. Its not that I am begging for you to come back I am begging that you are gone. That you disappear… so that I never will meet you again. I am sorry… I am so sorry. No, I am not sorry that is a lie. I am not sorry for anything. My mind keeps going around in circles. I can not even concentrate. You have tainted everything around me. Even if I do not want to I still love you. How is that possible? Even after what you did, even after what I saw. How can I still feel this way? Please let it end! There is not much more I can handle. I will go insane if I can not stop this. Please, please… what can I do? My mind drifts off finally. Its been weeks, and still I am like this. I can’t go to school… I can’t… don’t make me. I’ll see you… its unavoidable. I can’t be like this… I am scared. My mind and body will never be the same. I have to get over this. I can’t let this set me back. Living in the past is not me… its not me. Who am I? I can not even answer that anymore. It’s a foreign question now. The only way to get past this is to stop thinking. I have to stop thinking about you. I have to construct different thoughts. Change my pain into anger… into hate. Whatever I can do to stop thinking about you. It can be my little game. My steps of how to ignore you… of how to stop thinking about you. Of how to never trust any other guy ever again. I can go by the alphabet. So today’s lesson kids is A for Anger. Today I will be angry… Today that is all I will think about. I will think about how angry I am at the world. The world is unfair… why did it have to be me. Why not someone else… I am not the only student in the school. So from today onwards I am going to be angry at every man I meet. I will think of them as scum. I will not talk to them. I will be mean to them. Its all just to forget about you. Its all because of you. You would be so happy… I hope you get sick. I hope something happens to you, something terrifyingly horrific. I wake up to the alarm going off. Be strong today… be angry. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ School ah yes… the place of torture itself. Gossip central with a twist. I am not going… I don’t want to go. No I must go… I must be strong. I must show you that I am different. That I am changing, that I am a different person. You will never come near me again. You will never touch me again. I pick up my shoulder bag and sling it over. There is nothing about this place that I like. No one here that I trust… everyone is the same. They stare, they point they laugh at your misery. Its their own game to cope for their lives. I guess I understand, I have my own game. The school is old and creepy. No it’s the people that make it feel that way. Today I have my war face on. My make-up is dark and I am wearing black. This is to ward off all evil. it’s a warning to others if they get close I will bite. Yes it’s a new start… a new person. I don’t care if someone tries to call me names. I am use to that already. Even if it was a previous friend I don’t mind. Their not my friends anymore. No one is my friend. Not after all of that. How can you be someone’s friend and believe someone else you don’t even know? People are so twisted. I walk up the school sidewalk. There are a few groups of people outside. A few of them are staring but most are talking to one another. I would rather be invisible than this. I can’t let myself care. I shift my eyes around alert of my surroundings. I will not smile, nor grin… no emotions. No emotions other than anger. When did the school entrance become this far away? I push up my bag on my shoulder and continue onward. Look straight forward just get to the goal. I push at the door but someone pulls it open before I get the chance. I look up and then look away. ‘Whoa what happened to you? You go goth or something?’ I continue on walking. Its one of those guys who tries to get under your skin. Ignoring is the best option. Especially with him since if you leave an opening he will continue to push you. My locker is not a place I will go anymore. Its to close to that place. I can’t go there… must avoid at all costs. I swerve around a group of pink pompoms. How sickening… how can they act like that? Don’t they know? How could they not… no wait they don’t know. No one really knows what happened. Only I know and he knows. Yet they are so willing to believe him. I become labeled as the liar, the girl who makes things up. Should I go to class? Why else would I come to this dump? I dash into the classroom avoiding another cloud of perfume inhaling airheads. How fortunate I am that I did not get sucked along with them. Is this all my fault? Is it because I did not put my foot down? Is it because I just went along with everything he ever told me? What a control freak… how could I not see that earlier? My bag slides off my shoulder and thumps onto the floor. Their curious glances do not go by me unknown. I can feel them… they want to know. They can’t know, never, never will they know. If they knew they… no… they can’t know. I sit down and close my eyes. No speaking to them… I am mute. I have no voice… its just like before then… maybe I should be outspoken and loud. I should be sarcastic and mean… I should verbally abuse them all. Make them stay away, make them not want to know. I open my eyes to see that more people have entered the classroom. I am so lucky that I have English first period instead of a different class. If I had that class first I wouldn’t have even dared come. This way I can work up my courage. I can work up my anger. I will think about you and all I will think of is anger. Yes that is my only feeling. The bell rings and more people run into the classroom. Idiots, why can’t you get here before the tardy bell rings. You know it is coming and yet you are always late. I clasp my fingers together. I set the edge of my elbows onto my table and point my fingers upwards. What to do? The teacher starts to take the roll. When she calls my name I do not answer. She looks up and sees me but stops. She looks twice and then arches her eyebrows. Yes that is the perfect reaction. Be confused… wonder what happened. I will never tell you. She continues on every now and then looking over at me. I continue to stare at her. This is step one glare make them feel uncomfortable. ‘Hey you… what’s up with you?’ I shift my eyes to look beside me. Another troublesome guy… better ignore him. I look back at the teacher. Never again will I trust anyone. People have lost my trust. I can never see them the same again. Even if they question me I will not answer. If they prod me and poke me I will not respond. The new me… ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Somehow I make it to lunch without running. The second half of the day will be more tricky. I will have to control my feelings better. I have gotten lucky so far. Not many people have really talked to me. I grab a juice and an apple and head off somewhere secluded. I will survive this. This is not the worst thing to happen to me. I will make it through these next few months and graduate. Then I will never have to think of this ever again. I walk down the hall and stop before that door. The memories are forever burnt into my mind. Our voices, the laughter and the fun we use to have. I continue walking… no more, no more…. Please stop! I feel as though there is more than one voice in my head. Yet it is just my different feelings. The end of the hall leads to a nice area where not many people go. There is one exception… just one. I walk outside but do not stop. This little area with its bench and flowers only brings pain to me now. The memories waft over me. It was my favorite study area… was, past tense. I would carry my work out here during study hall… it was the only place I could get away. Now there are no places to get away. I was sitting there as usual when he came along. That is how we first met. I wish I had never met him. I wish I had not came out to study that day. I should have stayed in the classroom like everyone else. I would have met him anyway though. I guess it was a unavoidable occurrence. I continue past this place going around the side of the school. There is a nice tree which seems to be calling my name. I walk over and sit down under its shade. There are many trees out here. I guess it was our school trying to protect the environment. This place is one giant nightmare. There is no escape is there? Even after I graduate it will continue. It will haunt me forever. I will never have a normal relationship. After what happened its impossible. I sip on my juice and look around. I wish I could draw still. That has been ruined for me as well. I bite into the apple. It is to sweet but what else is new? The only thing my bitterness has not ruined is this apple. I should enjoy it until it is gone. As I finish my perfectly dark lunch I hear a crunch behind me. It is either a bird or a person. Yet why would someone else be out here? Is it another person like me? I twist around to look behind me but no one is there. Oh well why would someone else be like me? I push myself off the ground and head back inside. Before I get even two steps away I hear another crunching noise. I whirl around to see a guy inching away from the tree. How could I not have seen him? My senses must be off. He stops and looks as though he was caught in a horrible act. ‘I was… um… umm… that is kind of my tree… I’m sorry!’ What should I do? He did not do anything wrong. He did not bother my lunch really. I am going to let him go. I shrug my shoulders and turn around. Why bother myself with a guy. Isn’t it better to ignore them? Although what’s with the that’s his tree thing? You can’t claim a tree can you? Really you can’t even claim land. Yet that is another subject. Back into the school I go. I do not even glance over at the bench on my way back in. Ignore it… ignore it. There is a trashcan right inside the doors so I can throw my trash away. Me and the trash are similar in ways. We were both discarded… both thought of as disgusting and used. That is not the only things. Well better get to class… I can catch up on my classes now. I do not think it is wise to have study hall right after lunch. That is my own thoughts, mostly because everyone will just sleep. Including the teacher. Be angry… be angry. I have to keep reminding myself…. Do not give in…. A is for Anger. B for Betrayal I can’t do this. I can not be this person. I can not… no I must. If I do not be this person then who am I? Maybe I should just graduate early… get out of here as soon as possible. I sit in the chair by my window. I can’t sleep… I can never sleep… It is almost impossible to sleep. Especially now… its like my body is waiting. It is like I expect something to happen… just like last time. Will I always live in fear? Every time I close my eyes I can picture it. To get to sleep I have to sleeping medicine. There is something not right with me. I hold my legs close to me. I feel so betrayed… that is going to be today’s thing. I will think about the betrayal and it will help fuel the anger. I will hold that anger close to me. It will help me get through this. I will get through this. Avoiding it is not an option at this point. Eventually I will get over this. Maybe in a few years, or decades. I may have to be prescribed medicine for this. Or maybe I will be admitted into a place. As long as I am safe… I close my eyes and it all comes back. His whispers in my ear… the warnings. I willingly believed him… why did I just believe him like that? His rough voice sounded so compelling. It was so authoritative you just couldn’t go against him. He was always telling me not to tell anyone… saying they wouldn’t believe me. Telling me that they would laugh at me… that we would both get in trouble. I now know that it wasn’t worth it. If we could get in trouble why do it in the first place? I was to mystified then to even think about that. When I open my eyes again I am back in my room. Far away from that place and time. I do not want to go back… It is behind me in the past. At one point I really had feelings for him… at one point… Not anymore, that is over. I am not going to waste anymore time on him. He was not at school yesterday… I do not know why. I am not going to care. I must tell myself that so I will stop obsessing. I will focus on that betrayal. That is my focus for today. I will think of my anger and that betrayal. Nothing else will be allowed in. Noting else… ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Last class of the day… the class I have been waiting for. Why does it have to be the last class? In a way it is a good thing. Of course it had to be the poetry class. One of my old favorite things. Not anymore… poetry is dead to me. I grab out a sheet of paper and start sketching on it. Might as well ignore everything as best as I can. If he comes over to me… I am going to glare… I will focus on that hate. I will focus on that betrayal. Nothing else will get in. I will not work in here. No one can make me. I sketch out the basics of a face. I slowly fill in the details. Add nicely shaped eyes and eyebrows. Thin nose with a mischievous smile. Then add the hair… When I am finished I notice it looks like someone I have seen before. Oh well… I fold the paper up and shove it into my folder. People are talking all around me… I look over and see him. He is talking with probably his next victim. If only I could warn her. I look away… it is none of my business. The front of the class is boring. I can’t stand it in here. I feel as though I am suffocating. I grab my bag and my lone folder. it’s the middle of class but there is no rule saying I can’t leave. Especially when I feel nauseous. Though they might not accept the reason… I saw someone’s face and it made me want to get sick. I head for the door when a hand grabs my shoulder. I look behind me to see him. He is touching me… he is touching me. Cursed hands! I glare heavily but he does not seem to notice. ‘Where are you going? Leaving class so soon?’ I purse my lips and shake his hand off. I am not talking to him. He is the last person I want to converse with. I don’t care if he tries to get me in trouble. It won’t work… because what if I don’t keep quiet anymore? I know now that I won’t get in nearly as much trouble as he will. I will probably get scolded… and if they want proof I have plenty. I would grin but I keep my emotions down. I walk out the door and do not look back. Where do I want to go? I can’t home at the moment… home is like a war zone. My mother keeps coming at me trying to question me. She doesn’t understand what I’m going through I can’t tell her anyway. Maybe one day I will talk to her about it at the moment no. My father could not care less what goes on. He is to busy having his hand up his new secretaries skirt. He’s a creep like most. The middle age pervert… it’s the more well known pervert. Of course it comes in variety. The hallway at this time of day is so much nicer. There are no people out to bother me. However there is that annoying footstep sound behind me. Keep walking… don’t look back. Something smacks into me and knocks my folder out of my arms. I fall forward trying to grab my folder. What weird person would dare knock into me? I look up to see the guy from yesterday. He looks down at me and then his eyes get big. ‘Sorr….sorry…. I’m so sorry… please forgive me. Don’t kill me!’ He thought I was going to kill him. Well that’s new… is that the new rumor going around? I’m a killer how pleasant. That’s just what happens within being back one day. I try to keep all emotions off my face. I stare at him and shrug my shoulders. I pick myself up and start walking again. Its kind of funny actually. That is just what I think though. Let him think whatever he wants. Its better to ignore him right? I push the door open and slowly walk down the steps. Where was he going anyway? Why was he running? Was a teacher after him? I can’t dwell on this… must not think about that. I have to figure out where I am going to go for now. The park is a nice place. Or was a nice place… I could wander the streets until its time to go home. That could be suspicious though. The street is surprisingly empty I figured there would be more cars. Anger what a sweet emotion. Turning me black destroying every bit of who I use to be. Its like sealing me away… I won’t get hurt again. I turn left and start walking faster. The more distance I put between me and this place the more safe I feel. Not many people would even be able to face going back after something like that. I was tricked… what a pity. I guess in the game of wits I was not so good. I am much wiser now I know his tricks his lures I am not going to fall for that again. He betrayed my trust… its not the same anymore. Nothing can be the same again. You just can’t fix things like that… you can’t bring it back either. I think I am gritting my teeth. Look at what’s happened to me. If only you knew how I use to be. You would know how drastic things have changed. It seems like only yesterday I was normal. I had a hunger for life. Now all I am left with is the desire to die. I want to change everything. I don’t want to be like this. Everything that ever was will be gone. First I start with how I act. Next is how I look. I think I will bleach my hair. Make it white the opposite of what it is now. Either that or I am going to cut my hair. Maybe I will wear a wig… that way it is less time consuming. Who am I kidding I can’t touch my hair. I am pathetic… truly I can not do anything. It makes me depressed… this is how I am use to feeling though. It’s a typical feeling for me at least since summer. I hear footsteps behind me. Probably just some random person… could be a kid. Although it sounds like the person is running. I will not turn around, unless this person runs into me as well. Maybe I should glance just to make sure. ‘Hey!’ My feet want to stop but I must keep going. I look behind just for a second. He came… just like a dog following its master. Except we all know its not that way. If anything it’s the opposite of that. Must keep going… I turn my head back and keep walking. Why did he come after me? Class is still in session he can’t just leave. I can’t let myself believe in this. He is just being like he always was. What a cruel person. Which of us is the real cruel one though? I can’t even tell anymore. I make my face blank first then add on the anger. Must be strong, do not give in. I can not let myself be so weak. He will not affect me. I can not look into his eyes because I know what will happen. I will be swept away again. Then it will be like before him controlling me. Me going along with his silly game of charades. There were no real feelings. They were words nothing more. Not even that time was real… it was I don’t know what it was. It was a disaster the worst mistake of my life. Yet at that time it seemed perfect. I must have been delusional. There is no other excuse for it. ‘You’re really ignoring me?’ He seems so shocked. Why should he be? He knows how the world works. He should understand but maybe its getting to him. All the pressure from lying… maybe he’s cracking. I will not look at him. I will not laugh, I will not cry. Maybe my anger is all I have. Where can I run to now? There is no place its like a trap. Either way I go there is no escape. Maybe he will eventually get irritated. He should leave he won’t get anything out of me. There is no point in just walking this way forever. I dash across the road without even looking. Quite dangerous but I got lucky this time I guess. I will not look back behind me. I will not answer there is nothing I want to say to him. ‘I know about it… I know what you're hiding!’ My feet stop unwillingly. How would he know about that? No one knows… well one person knows. Yet I thought that was confidential he wouldn’t tell him. Unless he knew who the culprit was. Which he still shouldn’t have told him. I take a deep breath that is in the past. I clear my thoughts and continue walking. He already knows to much and that is all I am letting him know. He will not learn anymore. Must ignore, must ignore. I wish I could talk about what happened. Yet… there is just something unresolved. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Nighttime such a peaceful time. Oh take me away from this place. I would give anything to be away from here. C for Caught There is no time… no time for excuses. I can not even imagine what to do. The past two days I have followed my two rules. Now what is today’s? I could plot… catch him in the act of trying to seduce someone else. I could get rid of him from my life. He could be taken away and never able to con anyone else ever again. Maybe I have everything wrong but this is how I see it. Should I be so spiteful? I put my hair up into a bun. The sun is just starting to rise… how could I even sleep last night? I still keep going over it in my mind… how did he figure it out? School will be starting in a few… what will I do about today? You know maybe I will graduate early. I can just go straight into college for the spring semester. Maybe if I discuss this with the counselor. Getting out of there as soon as possible is my only choice. I can let this all be in the past then. I can be a different person. I will go far away to some college no one around here has ever heard of. There already is one college I applied for. So there is one possibility. Then I can just restart. Forget about this place and everyone here. Especially him… I like this idea. The lights are off but it feels as though there is a spotlight on me. Why do I have that feeling? I feel as though I am going to be submerged into the past. It is because of all of these thoughts. I close my eyes and see it all again. That day while I was sneaking around… they had summer school at the high school but I went there for the books. I just wanted to read, and yet… I chose the wrong day. I was tricked… he said he needed help but it wasn’t with what I thought. He trapped me, lied to me… I felt so used. I still remember that look in his eyes. It was like a hungry wolf. I was the prey because I was the weakest he knew that. When I open my eyes I realize that I should be leaving for school. I have dwelt long enough in the past. I am going to have to avoid my mother again this morning. She is probably already up… and waiting. There is only one way out, through my window. Which lucky its not that far from the ground and there is the roof on the porch. The neighbors will be suspicious but let them think what they want. Its their imaginations. I avoid the mirror at all costs. It only reminds me of what was. I only use it when I need to. Its kind of like my feelings. I will only use them when I need to. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Lunch is fast approaching. Math I use to like math. Now its just a bunch of numbers on a paper. With no meaning to me… it is blank. I can not seem to make my brain comprehend it anymore. Its dead to me… So now all I can do is sit here. I put on a mask and pretend. Even though it does not help much. During lunch I am going to see the counselor. Its not like lunch is highly nutritious and not eating will affect me. The teacher walks back up to the front of the class and starts on her daily speech. Its about finishing the work she handed out and everything else. She always says the same thing everyday. I wonder if she knows she repeats herself. Although it means the bell is going to ring soon. Right after I think that the annoying sound goes off. I stand up and grab my bag and my folder. Someone taps my shoulder and snickers. I am guessing it is another pathetic person. I am not wasting my time. ‘Hey you, its not Halloween.’ Ignore them, its just a stupid person. The person does not seem interested in bothering me when I do not answer back. Well better get to the counselors office. I think he takes his lunch after all of the students get through. If not then I will have to visit him later. Either way I am talking to him. I hope does not ask to many questions. My voice has not worked in I don’t know how many weeks. Its kind of been the ignoring me thing going on. Its been nice actually but then again I have not really wanted to talk to any of them. What would I say? They didn’t believe me so what next? I am not giving out free chances… that reminds me of monopoly. Which is what this school runs on. One week you are everyone’s best friend the next they think your scum or a nick in their perfect little lives. Their lives are to peaceful they need a rude awakening. Yet that is not my business. Do you think I have taken to drastic steps? The only reason is because I don’t deserve anything. I can’t wear colorful things because it makes me depressed. I can not listen to much music because it makes me angry. So this is who I am now. Its not like I became this way by choice. I wish I could be like I was. Yet things can’t just go back. I am not going to therapy or anything… That would make it worse. It would be like forcing me to speak about my problems. Which I can barely mention my problems to myself. I have been avoiding mentioning it… my mind still has not come to terms with it. The counselors door is open when I finally get there. I can hear faint mumbling and clicks on a keyboard. He must be working on something. Should I interrupt? Maybe if I knock on the door. ‘Come in whoever is out there.’ Well so much for knocking. He must have good hearing. I shuffle in wary of what to do. All I have to do is get in and out. No more chitchatting we are not buddies. We are not friends, comrades, maybe acquaintances but that’s it. There is no one else in here I chose a good time. ‘What do you need?’ He sounds a little rude but I am going to overlook that. He may be having a bad day. I can understand that at least. ‘I um… I um…’ My voice shakes and wavers slightly. Can I even speak? This is so stupid, my body does not even work right anymore. ‘Speak up.’ He is a little commanding. I just need to ask and that’s all. ‘I was um… wondering…’ I scratch the back of my head. Calm this is nothing. No emotions… nothing blank face. ‘… do you think it is possible for me to graduate early?’ He finally looks up at me. I arch my eyebrow. If I can put on this mask then maybe I can get through this. Maybe I would be better off dead. I should be dead instead… then there would be no more chance of that happening again. Suddenly I feel like curling up into a ball. Not this feeling again. I have dealt with this for months. I keep myself standing straight up instead of doubling over like I desperately want to do. ‘Do you have all your credits? All the required classes? Are you sure you want to? Are you going to college?’ I tilt my head and beat my foot on the floor. How to address this exactly. I move forward more until I am a few feet from his desk. He eyes me carefully. He must be assessing me right now. Don’t worry Mr. Counselor I am not going to hurt you. Its not like I have turned delinquent. Well not exactly… ‘I have all my credits needed as well as all the required classes. I have four years of English already and almost a half more. I have four years of math already and three years of science and a quarter if that counts. As well as two years of social sciences. I am quite certain I want to graduate as soon as possible. I am going to a college far away I have already been accepted.’ Should he not know about all of this? He is the counselor he should have these files on hand. I feel like I explained things to much. I will not tell anyone about this. This is my little secret. No one will know… and no one will know where I am going to college either. If they knew they might try to harass me more. Even more than they are trying now. It does not bother me so much but it is quite distracting. ‘Okay let me see what I can do… are you going to stay until the end of the semester. We have to open windows, and one is the end of the semester the other is a little earlier.’ I would rather be out of here as soon as possible. ‘Can I take the earlier one?’ The faster I am away from here the more relieved I will feel. Maybe you could call this escaping but oh well. Yes I am a coward and I am escaping from my problems. What else can I do? Its not like I can clearly decide. My mind is not totally here anymore. It comes and goes with the moments. He nods his head and turns to his computer. What do I do? Should I stand here. ‘That gives you two weeks then. I will inform all your teachers.’ I can’t let that happen. No one must know. If the teachers know everyone will know. That’s… even him he will know… I can’t not. My throat goes dry. ‘Can you please not tell them.’ I swallow around a lump in my throat. Calm maybe I can convince him no to tell them. Or maybe tell them the day before I leave. By then I can be gone and out of here. I will have everything packed by then. I am not taking much with me. I am going to burn my journal definitely. It has to much in it. He turns back to me and eyes me more. What is wrong with this guy. Does he have eye problems? If so then he should get glasses not squint more at me. It makes me feel uncomfortable. It makes me feel like he is examining me… like him. I shudder with this thought and look away. ‘Fine, but I will have to tell them something.’ Huh? Can he see what I am feeling? Does he understand? No that’s not possible… how could he understand? Did he go through something similar? ‘You should not hold things in. It is bad for your body.’ My lip quivers a little but I stop it. Maybe he does see what I am feeling. He looks away finally. I clear my throat. Well I guess I should get to lunch. Or maybe I will just go hide out somewhere. I don’t want to see anyone else today. This has used up my patience and confidence. ‘Thank you.’ My voice is whispered and sounds as if a breeze just came through here. Its kind of scary. Almost like a ghost of my old voice. I turn around and half run out of his office. I did not think it would be that easy. I am glad it was that easy. The most difficult part was speaking. I may get called back to his office. Who knows I may have to sign some papers. Where should I go? I don’t want to go outside. I stop halfway down the hallway. There is no where to go. I slump down the wall and sit on the floor. I am pathetic. What happened to my anger and betrayal? I bring my legs up close to me. There is no longer a person here… not even half of a person. I lost that… literally almost. I lay my head down on my knees. Who am I? I can not even answer that anymore. I feel as if I am running after something I can not catch. It is like knowing you will never reach your destination. I once was so close I could breath it in and now… it crumbled under my touch. Like dust it blew away in the wind and became one with the earth. I miss you is what my mind says. My heart feels disgusted. My eyes feel like crying but I have to much pride left for that. Even after all this I still have pride. I want to slowly die. At least I know there is one person I could meet once I die. She is safe now… I am guessing it was a girl. I never got to know. You give me something and then take it away. What type of place is this? I just want to go far away… far away… ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ How did I fall asleep? Who found me? Who was touching me? I blink my eyes and glance around. There is no one around. Where is everyone? I am not in a infirmary I am in a class. Did I turn back the clock or something? Am I getting another chance. I will walk away I will run whatever it takes. There is a clicking noise nearby like a pop can. What am I laying on? My arm twitches… a nervous tick? I hear shuffling and then a face appears before me. I scream and then things are gone again. D for Dare I can’t stand myself. Why am I like this? I see his face and then it all goes away? Everything I have worked on even if for a few days. Just like that… and I was avoiding look at him. I was avoiding conversing with him. Its my fault entirely this time. I fell asleep first and then he found me. Why did he find me? Why not someone else? I screamed and passed out from shock this time. I can not be around him normally. Its ruined, my whole mind panics when I see him. Its not normal at all. Its like I have been conditioned. What does this remind me oh yes that test they did on a baby called Albert. He ended up being scared of white furry things… well I guess I am now scared of oddly handsome guy teachers. Weird right? I should not be scared… maybe no I should not even think that. I made it home after a interesting… yeah I can not even explain it. Let’s just leave it at that. I did not talk to him so don’t worry. I must focus on my anger. He will not get past betraying me. He was caught in the act… unlucky him. I think I have found the answer to my third action or rule. I am not sure what to call it. I forgot what I was calling it earlier. That is how good my mind is working. I am going to use dares to get through the day. I will dare myself to be brave. That is number one dare. I curl up in my chair and stare out the window. How can people walk around so calmly? Don’t they know what is out there? How can they be so careless? Do they not care? I tilt my head and knock it against the back of my chair. Let me leave… oh let me leave. This street is so quiet… most of the time. I close my eyes… I can not sleep. I have not been able to sleep again for the past two nights. I was just starting to get over that. There was only one person who could help with that… he is gone now. I am not talking about that guy at school. I am talking about my best friend. Let’s call him J it seems like a good letter for him. J was my best friend he was a year older than me. We grew up in this neighborhood he always took care of me. He warned me but I did not listen. I need him now… and he is not here. No one is here anymore. He went away to college, besides I could not bother him with my stupid problems. I am sure he has more concerning matters. I guess I never appreciated anything until now. That what I mean is I appreciated it to late because now all of it is gone. All crumbled away… A tear escapes but I quickly wipe it away. I can not let my feelings get to me. Wait I can not keep this mask up all the time. Eventually I will break… I have to relax and let it out sometime. I crinkle my toes together and then spread them out. I need a distraction… something… you know maybe I will just wonder the streets tonight. I can not sleep anyway. Might as well do anything. Its not like anyone will miss me. They probably will not even know I left. Then if I get tired during tomorrow I will just leave school. Or find a more safer place to crash. I don’t want another run in with the enemy. Yes let me consider him the enemy. He is the enemy because of how he makes me feel. Its unacceptable to me. I have to much on my mind to even think about that. Is it his fault this all happened. Partially I guess… its his fault he couldn’t keep calm. His hands just had a mind of their own I guess. It was partially annoying. Yet at the time I had never felt anything like that before so I willingly accepted it. I did not think about the future I did not think that it would turn out like this. If only I had not heard that… if only I had not done that. So does the blame lie mostly on me? Is it because I overheard a few things I shouldn’t have? Is it because I didn’t know… I knew to late and there was nothing I could do. It was already gone and done. You can’t blame me because I did not know. The image comes into my head again. Wondering down the hallway towards that classroom. There is a small crack in the door. I smile and tiptoe ready to surprise him. My stupid childish dreams float around in my head. I get closer to the door and hear giggling. Someone else is in there… someone else… not me. He tells her to calm down. She asks him what’s going on with him that she has seen him with someone around in the next town. Yes we had to go to another town because he was to ashamed. It was immoral, improper I guess. The summer breeze drifts through the air and twirls my hair around. I expect for him to defend everything for him to stand up and say that it is none of her business. Yet all he does is sit there and laugh. He tells her that it was a joke that he is messing around with some girl he just met. My heart became broken… but that is not all. It got much worse after that. I refused to see him. He wondered why not even knowing that I heard. What a jerk! Oh yes but it got worse. Much worse… right before school started… I can not even mention it now. I wish I could accept that. Yet I can not it is… not something easily spoken. I can’t stay here. There are to many memories linked with this place. This place where I use to wait. This place where I dreamed and had hopes. Those things are dead to me now. There is no hope for me I have no dreams. They were burnt to the ground in a tragic fire. No one even tried to rescue them either… I could not even care. I open my eyes and look around. It is probably near midnight by now. The best time to wander the streets. I wipe away the tears and make sure to dry my face. I turn on my small lamp no one would notice it is on. I touch up my make-up and get on my clothes for tomorrow. I will probably not come back for tonight. It is better like this. I have to believe that. I will believe… I am daring myself to be brave. I am also daring myself to get over this. Maybe I need a new change. I don’t think I could handle a new relationship. Yet maybe something else a new hobby or something. Who knows… ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ My head flops from side to side. This place is surprisingly boring. All I see is stupid drunk people. I am glad I am not one of them. I could be worse I could be like that. I could throw out everything and drown myself in alcohol. You know at the moment that does not sound to bad. What am I thinking? A strange glimmer of my past self comes up. She is sunshiny with cute braids in her hair. I miss those days… I was so simple and easy minded to easily fooled. I stop my head and look over the booth. At least there is decent entertainment. Well when I can see them at least. Most of the people are up and dancing around shoving their butts everywhere. Its horrifying maybe I should catch this on tape… it would make for a really funny blackmail video. I could go up to them and ask hey do you remember that night? If they say no then I could laugh and say well I certainly do. Then I could either leave them puzzled or show them the tape or just blackmail them with the information I have. I click my tongue… maybe I am thinking to much. It is the surroundings I guess that is making me think like this. A voice comes over the speaker now and announces that they are taking a break. The people scream and some boo. Wow… these people need to stop drinking. How can someone waste their whole lives in a place like this? I shouldn’t even be here. Why am I here again? Oh yes distraction… I am surprised they even let me in. The guy looked at me once and just let me in. Weird I wonder why… I hear snickering and look up. A group of use to be popular high school girls walks by. You can tell by the cloud of perfume and the hot pink nails. As well as the overdone make up although I guess I have no room to speak. At least I didn’t go 80’s… maybe I will do that next week. It would be interesting. At least it would entertain me. I could change my theme each week… sounds fun but I don’t think I have the heart for that. I sigh and then inhale deeply. I look down at the floor which is littered with various objects. There is one which I believe to be a condom… why it is doing on the middle of the floor is beyond me. People are so weird. There is a weird shuffling noise and the seat I am sitting on moves slightly. Since it is a round booth someone might have sat on the other side. Its not like I was trying to monopolize the whole booth. ‘You over there what’s your name?’ I look up and then over at the person sitting next to me. I was right someone did sit down. He has dark hair and I think he is wearing eyeliner. I am just going to ignore that. Must keep face blank. What makes him think I am going to answer him anyway? ‘I asked you a question!’ Maybe he is drunk as well. If so then he is a violent drunk. I am saying this because of his tone. He does not seem friendly but he seems harmless. At the moment not many people could really hurt or harm me. I tilt my head and arch my eyebrow. ‘Maybe she doesn’t want to talk to you.’ Another person appears out of nowhere. Where are these people coming from? Are they like rabbits coming from a magicians hat? I lower my eyes at the new person. He looks familiar… I am not sure I like how he looks. I admit he does seem handsome but so does his friend. So that doesn’t mean anything. The only difference is that this guy can take a hint. As well as he is wearing maybe mascara on top of the eyeliner. Maybe he is a cross dresser. Who knows? I look away and focus to the distance. I am starting to feel tired… maybe I should have stayed home. ‘Who doesn’t want to talk to me? Everyone always wants to talk to me!’ I can still hear their annoying voices. So the one guy is a bit egotistical. That’s nice on top of the already annoying attitude. That makes it so much better. Yes I should have stayed home. It is interesting watching the drunks but still… I can tell that one of them is moving closer to me. They better not touch me. ‘So hey you what’s your name?’ I look back over at him my eyes lowered. He is really asking me that? I think I am just going to leave. It was a mistake to come here. Yet where else is there to go? This guy is quite interesting looking. He seems to be… well possibly a pervert. He has that look to him. He is smirking strangely at me its kind of creepy. ‘Just leave her alone.’ I look over at the other guy. I don’t like how he looks he reminds me of someone. He smiles at me and nods his head. Then he walks away shaking his head. Oh great now I am alone with the freak. I’m leaving no more delaying this. I stand up and walk past him. I am just going to find a different place to hide out. Maybe the library would be a good place. No they would get to suspicious. There is not many places to go. If I wandered the streets the police would get suspicious. Unless I just stay in my room with the door locked watching the outside world. Which that just does not sound entertaining. I take one last look at the place. In a way I envy these people. They are secure enough to be like this. I can not even do that. Outside the air is more cold or so I guess. I have been reprogrammed not to feel it. I inhale deeply and exhale watching my breathe turn white and then disappear. I can not hold myself up any longer. My knees begin to shake and I fall down to the ground. I am to weak for this. I wish I were stronger, if I were stronger nothing would bother me. Yet everything bothers me… tears start to well up in my eyes. Why am I crying? I close my eyes but some tears manage to escape. So much for no emotions… ‘You shouldn’t be on the ground like that.’ I don’t care, I don’t care… I dared myself to be brave. Yet I can not even hold onto that. Everything always slips away from me. I guess I should get use to that. I can not even say that I am completely sane. That is because I know I am not. If only you knew everything… but I can not tell you everything. If I told you everything… you would not believe no one believes. How can I trust anyone? Its not possible for me. I might as well state it though. The whole truth including all the tidbits. If you don’t believe that is your problem. I wipe the tears off my cheek. It started during the summer. I was sick every morning and I could not stand it. So I made an appointment to see the doctor. He said he was going to come with me. He said he did not like it when I was sick it worried him. What a lie he made. He never showed up and I went alone. The doctor asked me questions I could not even begin to tell you. The one question made me think, which when I did not answer he just looked at me. He marked something down in his little book. I felt so sick I should have known. I should have known. The room felt like it was enclosing on me. The doctor said he wanted to run some tests. I already knew what the tests were of course. He asked me if there was a possibility that I might be pregnant. Which… what could I say? It took about a week to find out the results. Which the day I found out I was going to tell him… That was the day I went to the school to find him. He was there with someone else. What could I say? I ran away and cried. My whole body hurt and was in pain. The next thing I knew it was gone. I blamed him for everything. I was hoping that he would help me that he would be happy. I was to much of a fool. I believed every word he told me. After that I stopped believing I stopped living. Everything stopped… it is like I am frozen in place. Still remembering all of that. Yet he has enough tenacity to act like that. It makes me angry… what makes it even more worse is my feelings. I can not tell if I have them or not… its not normal. There was one more thing which makes it worse. I can not… no its not even mentionable. Be brave, be brave…. Oh help me someone please help. My head nods off and hit’s the ground. I am pathetic. I am hopeless, I am nothing. Publication Date: June 12th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-kareca94
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-l-vampire-horrible-us/
L.Vampire Horrible Us Love gone wrong... Introduction I was tired of this. Everything he did to me, hurt me. But I still loved him. Our love would never end. Or maybe it would. Everything he did to me, hurt me emotionally and physically. Whenever he slapped or punched me, I was too scared to fight back. Too scared to just break away from him. I was afraid that he would abuse me all over again. So I never did break up with him, even though I wanted to. Sometimes he hates me. Sometimes he loves me. I felt the same way about him. So I believe there is no point breaking up with him because later on in life he would find some other way to flatter me all over again. To love him again. Well I believe this a cycle. A continuous cycle that will just go on and on without end. Chapter 1 "Hey are you sure you want to watch this movie?" I asked Danny. "Yes just put it in the DVD player and start it, God." He replyed obviously annoyed. I sighed and inserted it into the player. While the movie was playing I stared at the screen thinking about Danny and his horrible attitude. I felt like bursting into tears. Throughout the year we had been together he had always been the same. I never thought he liked me and I always questioned myself why we were still together. I would of thought by now we would have been through. But don't get me wrong he was amazingly sweet when we first met. He even bought me a heart filled with little deliciously precious chocolates for our first date. I don't know why but I am still in love with Danny. I mean he is seriously attractive. With apple green eyes and a dark skin tone. He also had dark brown hair and a muscular body. "Get me some Coca Cola." Danny said scaring the bejeezus out of me. I stared at him thinking he was joking. "Now." I stood up and walked over to the refriderator slowly. I opened it and grabbed a coke. I then tossed it to Danny. It landed write on his big toe. "Ouch!!! What the heck were you thinking???" His toe immediantly started bleeding. "I'm so sorry!!! I'll go get a bandage!" I exclaimed. "No forget it idiot. I can't even trust you with cans of soda. You are so crazy. Don't get me the cheap bandage of yours. I am leaving. Bye see ya... I hope not soon!" "I am sorry just let me help you out. Please." I said. "Daniella shut up!" He roared, ran to the door (limping), opened it, and ran out(limping). I collapsed onto the floor bursting into tears. I felt so bad. My annoying blond wavy hair fell onto my face. I brushed it away and ran to my bathroom. I put my hands under the faucet and slashed cold water all over my face and my medium brown eyes. I dried my face with a towel and hopped over to my bed. I landed face first into my pillow. "Uhhh..." I groaned. I fell asleep about five lonely minutes later. I woke up about an hour later to my phone beeping telling me I got a text message. I unlocked my phone and read my text message. Hey. I'm sorry. From: Danny I didn't reply. Totally not in the mood. I slowly drifted back to sleep. Another two minutes later my phone beeped again. I ignored it this time. I just laid there on my bed thinking. " If my parents were alive they would be here to help me right now ." I thought. Thinking about my parents, which died when I was six in a car accident, didn't help the situation. It made me even sadder to think that I was all alone in my situation with no one to help. All of a sudden I heard the door bell ring. I ran to the door and opened it very surprised as I saw who it was. It was Danny in a white shirt and jeans with a beautiful red rose in his hand. "I'm sorry D. I hope you forgive me for all that I have done. I brought you a pretty red rose for you. I hope you like it." I stood closer to him taking the rose from his hand. I smelled it. It smelled well like roses. I smiled up at him. "I forgive you. Sorry about your toe. And thanks for the rose. I love it." He grabbed my face gently. He then gave me the softest kiss ever. "Let's take a walk D. Please. With me." He said sweetly. "Fine." He took my hand as I closed the door. We started to walk down my street slowly together."I love you D." Danny said. "I love you too." I replyed. Chapter 2 I woke up to find Danny snoring close next to me in my bed. I laid there thinking about our lovely walk yesterday. A few minutes later the snoring stopped. I looked at my side seeing that Danny was awake. "Hey good morning." He said groggily. "Mornin'." I replyed back. "D. Let's go by Mc. D's and get some breakfast." "K." I jumped up from the bed and walked over to the bathroom. "I am going to take a shower and do my hair." I said. Daniel replyed with a "K." I rushed to the bathroom, brushed my teeth, took a warm shower, and started to do my messy blond hair. I decided I was going to straighten it for today. I grabbed my straightner out of my cupboard and plugged it in. I took a piece of my hair and started to gently pull it through my hair when... BOOM,BOOM,BOOM!!! I jumped pulling out a couple of my hairs. "Hurry up in there we don't have much time left slowpoke!!!" I glanced at my bathroom clock. It was 8:30am. We had plenty of time! Mc. Donald's stopped serving breakfast at 11! I unplugged the straightner and put everything else away hoping not to here another tantrum of Danny's. While I walked out of my bathroom Danny said "Well don't you look ugly today." Ughhh...."Well why don't you look at yourself in the mirror? People compare you to well they don't even know." I muttered embarrassed at his comment. That did it. "Excuse me? What did you say to me? If you have something to say than tell it to my face stupid." "Nothing." I muttered back. "Yeah, I thought so." Danny said furiuosly. I wasn't going to let that mess up my day or even my summer vacation. When Danny was finished showering (which let me tell you....he took way longer then me...) we headed to my red Camaro. I hopped in the passenger seat while Danny hopped into the driver's. He backed up the driveway and we got to Mc.Donald's in less then eight minutes. I sat down ready to enjoy my delicious egg and bacon cheese sandwich. I was about to take a bite when Danny dropped his ketchup packet by his shoe. "Hey D. Get me that please." I sighed hungrily. (Yeah, it's so much closer to me...) I went under the table and grabbed it. I put it into his hand. "Thanks." He said obviously not meaning it. I was about to take an enormous bite of my awesome sandwich when Danny dropped his napkin. "Get me that too." "Would it kill you to pick something up that is less then a centimeter away from you?" I practically shouted into his face. I snatched my sandwich from the table, and stormed out the door. I then sat at the bench out in front. I was going to have to eat my breakfast alone to survive. Again I wished my parents were here. Or even a friend to help me out with my problems. But it's not like I am a people person. I have friends that aren't really permanent. Once they become friends with me then a week passes by they find someone else way more interesting then me. That has happened a lot. Let's see who my past "friends" were. I remember Jessica, Lindy, Zoey... I could go on forever and even when that forever is over I could still keep going. I took another big bite of my food when I heard the door open. It was Danny. He started walking over to me. "Hey D. Why did you leave me all alone?" "Leave me alone." I said with my mouth full. I took my last bite, cleaned up, and went over to my car with Danny following closly behind. I opened my passenger door and got in while Danny got into his seat. We drove to my house without a word. "Bye." Danny said. As he got out of my car. I rushed to get in the house. I sat down at my computer chair and just thought of Daniel. I mean what the heck is his problem? I wasn't his servant! And it's not my fault he has such a bad temper... Chapter 3 Tap. Tap. Tap. Game over. I put my iPhone down on my computer desk and sighed. Ding! It was the doorbell. I sighed again and picked up my iPhone and started to play Ninja Wars again. Ding! I was not going to answer it. I continued to tap away. Game over. "I need to talk to you." I jumped nearly falling out of my chair. Danny smiled up at me and stepped closer. He was holding a flat black box in his right hand. I turned back around and stared at my black computer screen. "How the heck did you get in here?" I asked leaning into my rolly chair. "Went through the window." He answered. Before I knew it I felt something being slid on to my neck. It was cold and made my skin tingle. Then it fell into place. I looked down gasping at the sight of a necklace with a rose made of beautiful smaller redish twinkling diamonds right in the middle. "Why did you put this bajillion dollar neckalace on to my neck?" I asked, very confuzzled. "It's for you." Danny said sweetly. "But why?" I asked still shocked. "Because I'm sorry for every little thing I ever did to you. I didn't mean to and I didn't mean it. You deserve this." "Um. Thank you." Danny bent down and kissed my cheek softly. My skin tingled even more. "I seriously owe you big time." I said smiling. "No. No you don't. Like I said, you definitley deserve this after what I have done to hurt you." Chapter 4 "Hahahaha." Danny and I laughed. (We almost died. Almost.) My eyes were glued to the T.V. watching America's Funniest Home Videos. Now there was a baby on that kept slipping on the wet tile in her kitchen. She kept on trying and trying but everytime she was about to stand up, she just came tumbling down. "D, do you want more popcorn?" Danny asked. "Yes, please." Danny walked into the pantry and grabbed a packet of buttery popcorn. He then placed it into the microwave and set the time for it. Up next was going to be a dog falling into the pool. That really didn't get me interested to keep on watching the show. I grabbed the remote from the brown coffee table and changed it to channel 200. They were giving music videos. Beep,Beep,Beep. The popcorn was finished. Before I knew it, Danny was sitting next to me with a big blue bowl of hot popcorn. "Hey, can you please change it back?" Danny asked. "Why? We have been watching this for over an hour." I explained hoping that he wouldn't explode. "Because I want to watch it. Why else?" "No. If you want to watch something then go watch it, some place else." I said looking him straight in the eye. "That's it. Give me the remote." He demanded. I shook my head no. "Daniella. Give it." I shook my head no again. Danny tried to snatch it from my hand, but luckily he missed. Then Danny's hands balled up into fists. One of his hands was aiming directly for my face. In a millisecond he could have punched my face. Before he even laid a finger on me, I threw my head back just missing Danny's punch at about one centimeter away from me. Danny leaned over and tried to take the remote from my hand but before he could I used my other hand to push him off the sofa. He landed with a thud on the carpet. I jumped off the couch and sprinted to the oppisite side of the living room. I closed my eyes and leaned against the wall trying to regain my breath. Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. Then I felt a warm hand close around my throat. I couldn't breathe. No air. Nothing. I was going to die. I mean I was already out of breath before he tried to suffocate me. I tried to grab his hand and pull it away from my throat. He was too strong. I could barely move even one of his fingers. I could feel my heart beat slipping away. I need a breath. More than anything. I couldn't feel my face anymore. The "breathtaking" hand loosen its grasp. I could take slow breaths. Then the hand loosened completely. I fell quickly to the floor my knees giving up on me. I laid there against the lower wall and let the air flow through my lungs. The blood in my face spreaded. I kept gasping for air and I finally began getting enough. I opened my eyes and found the front door wide open. Danny had left. He had left me. After I had regained all of my breath my head was full of questions. Most of them were, 'What should I do now?'. I felt a tear find it's way down my face. I just didn't know an answer to any of them. I mean I couldn't hit him or anything. Too scared. The same familiar statement went through my mind. I wish my parents were here. To help me. To support me. To love me. Why did they have to die? This was the time when I needed them most. I knew always that I was alone in this world. No friends. No family. I mean I had family still here in this world, somewhere, but no way to contact them. Another tear came sliding down my cheek. I wiped it off my face. Then I felt my hand go toward the diamond rose necklace that Danny had given me. I winced when I thought of him. I ripped the necklace off my neck causing it to break apart. I went out through the door into my front yard. I clutched the necklace tight in my hand. I then tossed it into the air and watched it fly towards the trees. I turned around and went right back in my house. I didn't care anymore that the jewlery was beautiful. I didn't even care that it was highly expensive. I didn't care who found it. Then remembered the rose. The beautiful red rose that was very close to dieing now. I took it from the vase and ruffly pulled the petals off one by one. I threw them all into the garbage. Then I ran to my room and threw myself on the bed. Chapter 5 I spent many days in bed just thinking about many things. Stuck in my mental world of horrible events and thoughts. All I thought about was Danny and what he had done to me. And how he changed so much since I met him a while ago. And how he had hurt me. Physically. Emotionally. He always used to be so sweet to me. (Please notice how I said used to.) He never had such a bad temper like now. Not until just like a month ago. He used to understand me. (again notice how I said used to) I could of told him anything weird about me and he would so much as just blink. He was the only person. Now I have no one left. Nobody. I have lost my family. My friends. Everybody I ever knew. I have even lost my old self. The way I had used to be. I might as well have died when Danny choked me. I should of let myself stay on that floor forever, and I should have stopped breathing on purpose. I could have died so easily. Not painfully. I would have prefered that more than what I am going through right now. I would of been so much easier. So much easier. Right now I needed to be loved and loved only. Loved by someone who actually cared about me. One who I can tell anything without him freaking out and thinking that I am such a wierdo. I don't want money. Or new clothes. Or new expensive shoes or jewlery. I want love. I needed to break up with Danny. I could trust him no more. I would not be with him any longer. Not after what he did to me. He could of killed me. I could have been dead. And he probably wouldn't even care. He would of left me there dead and forget about me. I needed to do something about about this. Chapter 6 I kept on walking. I cannot stop now. Just keep walking. I kept walking on the long sidewalk over to Danny's house. I can do this. See I am the one who is breaking up with someone and I feel pain too. I got up to Daniel's driveway and walked slowly up it. I took a deep breath. I was so nervous and scared of his reaction. I reached the door and took in another big breath. I rang the doorbell once and waited. No answer. I knocked on the door three times. About ten seconds later the door slowly opened. He stood there and waited. "Well what do you want?" He said looking impatient. "We need to talk." I said back serious. "Well, hold on. I need to apologize first." He said. Nope. Not going to let him. "Nope. Sorrys won't help fix what you have done to me." "Come on. They worked every other time." "Well not this time. Those fake apologies and those gifts that no longer mean nothing to me and never mean't anything to you except covering over what you did to hurt me, will not work this time. Not ever again." "So you're point is...?" He asked. "My point is that I am going to break up with you." "Oh, no your not." "Oh, yes I am." I said. "Fine. Whatever. Leave me. Now don't come to me later and say that you can't live without me. I can find a better girl anyways." "Trust me. I won't." Danny then grabbed the door and shut it closed hard with a bang. I ran back to my house all happy and free. Well I wasn't going to be happy the next day because... Chapter 7 I was going to pay for my ticket to watch The Hunger Games. I walked up to the ticket seller and said,"Just one ticket for The Hunger Games, please." She handed me the ticket. "Thank you." Then I waited in the line for some popcorn. I scanned the movie theatre, looking to see if I recognized anybody there. Then I saw a couple that caught my eye. I looked back to them and I noticed that it was Daniel with some other girl. They were kissing each other softly on the lips. My heart fell down into my stomach. I ignored it. I tried to forget about them. I ordered my popcorn and walked right past them into the movie room. There were already so many people there already. There was only one seat in the middle and at the end of the row. I hurried over to it and sat down. I watched the previews in the mean time. "Hey what's your name?" I almost fell out of my seat. I had forgotten that there was someone sitting next to me. I looked over and saw a guy that looked my age. "Daniella. But most people call me D." "Well my name is David. Oh and by the way um... I only came to see this movie because I was bored and had nothing else to do. (hint,hint)" I giggled, embarassing myself. "Hey so would you like to join me tommorow night for pizza?" I was so thrilled I managed to say, "Sure. That would be great." I smiled. Text: ` All rights reserved. Publication Date: March 8th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-l.vamp
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-sassyjerrica101-my-invisible-love-story/
sassyjerrica101 My Invisible Love Story Mark has been bullied all of his life and nothing is very good at home so to escape that life he tries to find his love story At School and My Friends This is a story about my love life and my other life if i'm gonna tell you this story right i'll start from the being let me just say this, love is the devil's card game so as he lays that hatred card down love isn't love anymore. The people that hadn't felt that nasty feeling I'm jealous of you. Anyways hi my name is Harry Goodwind and here's my love story or whatever it is. Everyday is the same I get up at 6:00am get dress and then go to school I go straight to my homeroom Ms. Renave's class. Then I set in my seat which is in the back of the class then when my classmates see where I sit they don't set near me making me look like a outsider which I'm not but I beat everyone else thinks that. Then when Ms. Renave see Mrs.Pyane are principle walks by the door Ms. Renave goes crazy because she tries so hard to kiss up to her so when she leaves the room my classmates throw paper wolds at me then of course I have to make a dumb remark ,and when I do this girl that sits in the front of the class laughs or giggles. I need to know who it is I hope it's Ella she's my dream girl. Of course she dating Liam and hes a jock but if I ever get a chance to date her i'd have to wait till they break up and become his friend. Speaking of friends Remi she and I were like to peas in a pot or however the saying goes.We would everything together and everyone had the nerve to ask if we were going out. You should of seen the looks on their faces when we said the answer their face.Even one time i even got the never to ask her if we were going out because it was me and her all the time so the answer she gave me I'll tell you Monday unfortunately that's the day she moved never got the answer back. She moved for two years to live in a different state but she moved back earlier this year but she doesn't talk to me all we say is hi or smile at each other in the hall.I don't know wut happen i guess because we never was in touch when she moved she probably forgot about me. Then there's used to be Conner best bud since as along as i remember. Hes just an awesome guy to be best friends with. He's like my Siamese twin that got surgically removed. Till he started dating this girl, Brooklyn she was my friend also but she started to come in between us. I told him that i didn't like her because of what she was doing. Then he got super mad at and said he wouldn't be my friend anymore. When i saw the look on Brooklyn face I would of slap her but that would be to mean. So now that Conner isn't my friend anymore just my sisters and me so i went from a freshman to senior year.Tomorrow i get to see if i graduate. Than i graduate within a week.It has been for years with no friends , txting, chatting and no reply's on twitter and Facebook i have been really really lonely. All I had was my family Text: 2012 sassyjerrica101 Images: sassyjerrica101 Editing: My mom has read it and shes said it was good enough to put it out there. so then my best friend told me about this web site Translation: its all in English that's the only language i know All rights reserved. Publication Date: August 31st 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-sassyjerrica101
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-kaitlyn-garlets-in-time-will-it-come/
Kaitlyn Garlets In Time Will It Come Depression over comes most... 8:15 A.M. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Zora I fall to the dirty tiled floor of the school hallway, landing on my butt. This happens everyday now, but I don’t care. Nothing can make me feel any pain—at least more than I am already. All around me, people my age are laughing at me, pointing at me because someone had tripped me on purpose. I ignore them and stand, picking up my belongings as I do stand without making eye contact with anyone. I used to make eye contact with them a long time ago, but it never did anything to help me out. So I stopped and always tried to stay out of everyone’s way so that I wouldn’t cause too much attention to myself. I wrap my arms around my books and my large binder that’s always over-filled with papers that I never toss out when I am done with them and watch the floor as I speed-walk away to my first class. I tune out all the laughs coming from behind me, trying to focus on breathing and walking. It’s hard to do those things all at once, but somehow I do. Step. Breathe. Step. Breathe. Step. Breathe. Step. Breathe. Step. Breathe. Step. Breathe. Step. Breathe. Step. Breathe. Turn-breathe-left. Breathe. Step. Breathe. Step. Breathe. Step. Breathe. Enter.Breathe. 8:32 A.M.------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Zora I end up in my second period class, making me have to backtrack to my first period class, all the way at the end of the opposite side of the school, causing me to be late for class. My day never starts out good, and it never ends well, either. I slip into my usual spot at the very back of the class, looking down the entire time until I do sit down. It didn’t take very long for people to start giggling behind their hands. “Zora, come over here,” my teacher that I can never remember her name said to me. I look up from the desk and stand, trying not to listen to the giggling and whispering. I stand and make eye contact with the teacher and walk over to her. She hands me a late slip, which is the fourth this week. Which means that I now have a lunch detention. I turn away from her and head back to my seat. “Hold on, Zora.” I turn back around dramatically and wait by her desk until she hands me another piece of paper. I don’t read it. I turn again and walk to my seat where I slip into a semi-conscious space-out. I like these because I can tune everyone out, including everyone around me who is still laughing and whispering about me. I even look like I am paying attention, but really, I’m not. I tune back in as the teacher walks up and down the isles. She finally makes it over to mine, and I have nothing out. She stops in front of my desk. “Zora? What are you doing?” She asks, bending down to see me considering that she’s at least two feet taller than me. I don’t answer and instead I grab my sketch pad out and start doodling in it. The teacher grabs it out of my hands and starts flipping through them. “Hey!” I say, standing. I reach to grab my drawings, but she moves out of my way. “Please, give it back to me. That’s invading my privacy.” The teacher stops flipping through the sketch pad and raises her eyebrow at me. “Oh, really? I thought it was okay considering that everyone that attends this school signed a contract stating that any staff or faculty members were allowed to search through any student’s belongings to make sure there isn’t anything that shouldn’t be in there. And this,” she stops and flips to one of my drawings. Everyone in the class bursts out laughing at what was drawn on the paper. I turn three shades of red and reach to grab it again. “This…is not something you should have at this school. I am confiscating it until further notice. Now get to work on your homework, or leave this classroom right now.” She turns on her heel and shoves my sketch pad into her draw—hard, probably making the pages bend. I sit down, angry now. I don’t do anything about it, though. I open my textbook to the page that I am supposed to be working on and sigh on the inside and tune the giggles and whispers from my ears until the bell rings. 9:16 A.M.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Zora I walk to my locker, wanting to cry. No one has ever taken my sketch book away from me—ever. I didn’t know what to do without it. I have never let anyone look at it, not even my parents. Thankfully, my dad stopped trying to get me to tell him what interested me so much about drawing people, and he stopped talking to me totally, which I was glad of. My dad and I never got along very well, anyways, and when he would try to talk to me, we ended in fights. The only real things we say to each other now without getting into fights is, “How was your day?” my reply would be, “Fine.” And I would walk up to my room where I closed the door behind me and stay there until dinner. “Awe…look at the cry baby opening her locker,” someone said as I yank the un-oiled locker door. I turn to see Megan Samson looking at her friends with a stupid smirk on her face. She starts laughing and everyone around her laughs a few seconds after she starts. “Do you miss your little brother?” She asks, mocking a little kid’s voice. She sticks her mouth out so her lips form an ‘O’. Everyone stares at them like they are the best thing in the world. I bet she uses those plump lips three times a day or more. No, scratch that. I bet she uses those whenever she can get a guy to get in bed with her. No, scratch that again. I bet she gets anyone, even some girls to use them. I almost smile, but I hide it well enough to just have a bored look on my face. I turn away from her and wipe the tears from my face and grab my next class things and close the locker. When I do, Megan is on the other side of the door, her arm against another person’s locker. She’s smiling down at me, her evil smile that makes me want to vomit every time I see it. I look away and turn to head to my right, where my next class is. Megan grabs my free wrist and spins me around to face her. “Let me go,” I say, not bothering to even try to get out of her strong grip. She raises her eyebrows and smiles wickedly at me again. “Make me,” she says, making everyone around us laugh hysterically. I close my eyes, but I don’t move. “Well, are you going to make me, like you made your little brother pay for not doing what you wanted?” She laughs, making it ring loudly in my ears. My top lip quivers. She finally lets me go once she’s satisfied enough and I turn on my heel and run into the bathroom, slamming the only open stall shut, causing all the other stalls to shake violently, considering that the stalls were barely on the hinges. “Hey! We’re trying to take a crap here!” a girl screams from the farthest stall away from me. I ignore her, letting the tears fall from my face. “Yeah, get the hell out of here, Fatso!” I’ve been called many names, but never Fatso. I have never been fat in my life. I’ve always been a skinny, small girl, boobless and all. I have ugly brown hair that never wants to be brushed and when I would brush it, it would always get super static-y or frizzy to where I would have to glob a ton of hair spray in it. That was way back when I actually cared about being popular and having a boyfriend. But now I don’t care about any of that. Once I stop crying, and I am sure that no one else is in the bathroom stalls, I exit the small stall and make sure that I never looked like I was crying and I walk to my classroom across from the bathroom. I glance at the clock. Its nine-thirty-four. Which means that I am really, really late for class. I slip into my seat, feeling like this had just happened and I wait for the teacher to ask me to come up to her desk and hand me a detention slip. But she doesn’t. Class goes by like nothing ever happened and I start to settle down with my anxiety. The bell finally rings after what seems like forever and I stand to leave. “Zora, can I see you please?” I sigh lightly and head to the teachers desk. “Yes?” I ask. “Can you tell me why you were late?” She asks, raising her eyebrow at me. My shoulders slump and I look at the floor. Tears spring to my eyes, but I blink them away. “Zora? Are you alright?” I manage to nod, but it comes out like a no. “Not really,” I finally say. There really isn’t any need to say yes, everything is fine, when she can obviously see that I am not fine. She stands and walks over to my left side, placing her hand on my shoulder. “Do you want to talk about it?” I shake my head. “That’s alright, I don’t blame you. You know that you can always come to me for anything, right?” I narrow my eyes a bit, but not enough for her to see it. I nod and turn to leave, but her grip on my shoulder tightens. I glance up at her and she smiles down at me, and I almost want to fall to my knees and tell her everything, but she wouldn’t understand. “You can go now,” she said and lets me go. I leave in a hurry. 12:00 P.M.-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Zora I sit in my usual spot at lunch and eat fast so that no one would want to come up to me and pick a fight with me. I finish my PBJ sandwich and stand and almost bump into someone. I glance up to mutter an apology, even though I know that even that wouldn’t do anything to stop them from being mean to me. But when I do see who it is, I don’t say anything to him. “Oh, I am so sorry,” he says. The new boy looks at me, and then glances down at the floor. “I don’t know anyone, and I was going to ask if I could sit by you. You looked all lonely. Is that okay?” I sputter. What am I supposed to say to him? I don’t know him, and he wants to sit by me? Well, that’s a new one. Even when there is a new person, Megan or someone finds a way to tell them right away that I’m not one to hang out with and they always listen. I wonder why no one has talked to him about me yet. I guess it’s a good thing, but I don’t say that out loud. “Uh…this spot isn’t taken anymore, so you can have it now. I was just leaving.” I grab my trash from my lunch and toss it into the trash can next to where I had been sitting. He looks down, almost like he’s disappointed that I was leaving. “Oh, that’s okay. See you some time, then,” he said, waving as I turned to leave. I don’t say anything. 2:36 P.M.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Zora I love drawing class because it’s the only thing that is actually real to me in my life anymore. I wish it was every single class I had, but then I would never get out of high school. This is the only time when I can actually be part of myself without anyone telling me not to be. Mr. Whitetaker, my drawing teacher, is one of the nicest teachers I have ever met. He doesn’t tell you that your drawing is inappropriate or not worthy of being good enough to be in this class like everyone else thinks. I enter the class room and sit down at the very back, where I can actually concentrate on what I want to work on. But now I don’t have anything to work on because my sketch pad had been taken from me from that stupid teacher. As I sit down, Mr. W’s phone rings and he answers it immediately and glances up at me. My heart skips a beat as he frowns. He hangs the phone up and heads over to me. I already know what this is about. “Zora, your needed in the principal’s office right now. It’s about your sketch pad. I’ll excuse you for today, if you want.” I nod and gather my things, and head for the door. I walks passed someone. That someone is the new boy. He smiles and almost waves at me. I actually notice that he’s brown haired like me and has beautiful eyes that I could easily draw. I shake the thought out of my head and walk to the principal’s office. I knock on his door and I enter once I hear him say so. I take a seat in the uncomfortable chair and wait for him to yell at me. I can see my sketch pad on his desk. My shoulders slump down as I notice how red his face is. “Zora, can you explain why you would be drawing inappropriate pictures in this notebook here?” he asks, holding up a picture I had drawn of a woman lying down, only covered up by a sheet and pillow. I shrug. “And this one?” he asks, flipping through some more of my drawings. “I don’t see a problem. Its art, not porn,” I reply shyly. His face turns redder and I can see his bald head with at least four veins popping out from his skin. I almost smile, but I hide it so I wouldn’t get into trouble. “This is not art. This is inappropriate drawings of people. Do you know what the school board would do if they found this out? I would lose my job and so would Miss Valtipo. Students have seen this. This is not expectable. Take this and put it away. I don’t want to see it out nor taken from you again, do you hear me? No more drawing at school unless it’s an assignment, you hear me?” I nod, swallowing a lump in my throat. Tears fall from my cheek and the Principal’s face turns back to normal. Maybe he thinks I learned my lesson and would never draw people naked again. I still don’t see the problem. Like I had said, this is art, not porn. 2:54 P.M. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Zora I walk back into the art room, glad that there are only four people in this class. Wait, scratch that. Now there are five, including me. That new guy is there. And he’s drawing something in his own sketch pad. At my usual table. I almost want to cry. No one ever sits at that table anymore, not since Tom Pulaski barfed all over that table. I don’t get what their problem is about that table. It’s been cleaned. I sigh and take a seat at the table, not bothering to look up. I take my sketch pad out and flip quickly to a blank page before he could see my drawings. “Wait,” he said, grabbing my sketch pad. I narrow my eyes at him and yank my sketch pad away from him. He holds his hands up in the air, as if he was being arrested. His pencil is still in his hand. “Sorry, I just wanted to see your drawings. I saw one, and I thought it was good. I saw it when that teacher held it up in the air for everyone to see. That was really mean of her.” He looks down at his own drawing. I peer at it, amazed at how easily he had drawn what he was seeing from the window. I turn to look outside and I can see that he put a lot of time and effort into it, even if it was only from today. What am I supposed to say to him? I don’t know him, obviously, but I wonder why he isn’t trying to make fun of me like everyone else does. Not that I’m complaining about it, though. It’s nice to actually have someone not make fun of me just because I’m different. I don’t say anything, but I just continue to look at my blank sheet of paper in my sketch pad until my eyes start to water from not blinking. I blink and look around the room, and then I finally end up looking at the new guy, who smiles when I glance his way. I turn away from him and finally start sketching lines on my paper. The drawing comes easily for me, just as it had come easily for him. I push that thought out of my mind as I draw legs of a female, sitting in a chair, gazing out the window, hoping for someone to come back. Its just like my dad, who waits for my real mother to come home, but already knows that that will never happen—and yet still watches for the moment that she finally does come back. I hadn’t even realized that I had been drawing such a thing until I noticed it when I finished, just as the last bell rang. Everyone was already gone, all but Mr. W and the new guy, who was working on his own drawing. I try not to glance at him, but my eyes wonder to where his hand was running the pencil over the face of someone. When did he start a new drawing? I hadn’t noticed. But then again, who am I to notice anything? I’m supposed to stay in my own corner, away from other people and keep to myself, but something kept making me glance up from my own drawing. I wish his arm wasn’t in the way. Then I could see what he was drawing. The new guy looks up when he feels me watching him draw. “Oh,” he blushes and closes the drawing. He turns his head, causing the locks of his hair to move out of his eyes. “Did you say something?” I turn and look down at my own drawing and close my sketch pad and stand. I didn’t want to have to walk home. I wasn’t about to miss the bus anyways. He stands as I turn to leave. “What’s your name? I asked around, but no one wanted to tell me. You know, people here aren’t too nice. They say mean things about you.” I stop, not facing him. Am I supposed to answer him? I felt like crying right now. He totally just told me basically that no one around here sees me as their equal, which I already knew, but still, now I feel even lower now that he told me no one would tell him my name. That shows you how much they think of me. They couldn’t even tell him my name. Tears spring to my eyes and I walk out of the art room. I don’t turn back. I shouldn’t even be talking to him, even if he doesn’t know me. I don’t want him to know me, anyways. He would freak out if he knew me. 3:37 P.M.¬¬¬-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Zora I’m late for the bus. Again. This has been the third time this week. Dad hasn’t been too happy the first time and the second time it outraged him that I walked home. I don’t see what the big deal is, but there must be some reason if it upsets dad. Its cold out, but I have to walk home. I walk to my locker, not bothering to rush because my bus has already left. It’s all because what’s-his-face wouldn’t stop bothering me while in art class. I sigh, glad that there isn’t anyone in the hallway. I look both directions before opening my locker just to make sure that there wasn’t anyone hiding out, ready to pounce on me when I wasn’t paying attention. When I am sure no one is there, I toss my text books into my locker and grab the ones I actually need and shove them into my backpack. Just as I close my locker, someone bangs their fists onto my locker door, making me jump back and screech. I slap a hand on my mouth as I see the one guy that I never wanted to be seen near ever again in my life. “Go away,” I manage to spit out of my mouth, looking down at the ground. I slam my locker door, hoping his fingers are in the way of the locker door, but after a few seconds, I know that they weren’t because he isn’t screaming in pain. I turn, but he grabs me by the wrist and pulls me to him. He hugs me to his chest, rubbing his hand through my hair. I try to shove him out of the way. “Let me go, Keegan,” I whisper, not bothering to shove him away anymore. I want so badly to have him next to me, but something inside of me tell me no, but my body won’t move. “Baby, I miss you so much. We were good together. What happened to us?” He asked, looking down at me. I yank my hand out of his grip. “You know exactly what happened between us,” I say, turning from him. “You didn’t want me anymore because I wouldn’t talk to you about what happened.” “You know that I still care about you, right, baby?” he asks. I almost want to run to him and kiss him like we did before my brother died. I laugh out loud. That was the first time I had actually laughed out loud and meant it in a long time. “If you still cared about me, then you would still be with me, but you don’t care about me. All you care about is getting into someone’s pants. Stay away from me,” I say. I turn and run, tears falling down my face. I can’t really see where I am going, but I know the school like the back of my hand, so I know where to turn to get to the front doors of the school. Step. Step. Step. Step. Step. Step. Step. Step. Step. Step. Turn right, turn left. Turn left again, then straight on till morning. 4:27 P.M.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Zora Once I get into my house, I feel safer, even though I know I’m not. I poke my head around the corner, showing the living room and dad, who’s drinking. Great. Just great. This is just what I need right now. I tip-toe to the kitchen, hoping dad couldn’t see me from the living room, which I knew was a less likely chance. He sees everything. “Zora! Get the hell in here! Where the hell have you been?” my dad screams. I stop and dramatically turn around. I really didn’t want to deal with this. I had to deal with too much at school, so why should I deal with him? I could run out the door and never come back. My real mother taught me to forge documents. I could move to a new school and start over, and no one would ever know what had happened. But instead, I walk into the living room and stand in front of my dad, who grips his beer bottle tightly. “Yes, dad?” I manage to ask. He burps, and then takes another swig of beer without turning his eyes away from me. “Where the hell have you been?” he asks. “I thought I told you not to miss that goddamn bus today. And what the hell were you thinking when you took that stupid sketch book to school? I thought I told you to stop drawing. Or have you stopped listening to me altogether, now, too?” He asks, taking another swig of beer. I look down at the floor. I wish mom was home. I don’t like her, but she’s the closest thing I actually have to an actual mother, considering that my real mother ran off with some other man, leaving me with my brother and my dad. Dad had married only a year later from loneliness. That’s when he started drinking. I shove that thought out of my head and tried to tell him that it was the new guy’s fault that I was late for the bus. He wouldn’t stop talking, and made me late, but dad doesn’t see it like that. “You could have fucking told him to shut the hell up and get the hell out of your way, now couldn’t you? Oh, wait. I forgot. You don’t remember how to say anything anymore, right? Not since your stupid brother died.” Tears fall down my cheeks. It wasn’t my fault Rasimus died. It really wasn’t, but no one seems to believe me at all. Not even my own father. I know he blames me, and that’s why he hates me. I narrow my eyes at him and turn on my heel and I head up the stairs, not caring if I was making a lot of noise as I bound up the stairs. I head for my room where I slam the door shut. I toss my backpack onto the floor and I flop onto my bed. I suddenly hear large, heavy footsteps pounding up the stairs. My heart quickens and I run to the door and turn the lock on the door so he can’t get in. I really wish my step mom was here. She could keep him under control, but then she would lash out on me for even thinking about making dad angry. Dad’s fists connect with the wooden door and he bangs and bangs until he finally gives up and I actually can breathe again. I slip under my covers and sleep. 7:08 P.M.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Zora I wake up to someone fist pounding my doors. I groan and sit up in my bed. I really didn’t want to get up and see who it is. It still could be dad still drunk, ready to slap me across the face. I flop back onto my bed, but the pounding is still there. “Go away,” I say to the door. “Sweetie, it’s me. We need to talk,” my step mom says. I sigh. She doesn’t sound angry. Maybe she had a good day at work today. Yeah, right. Mom never has a good day at work. Not unless she just got her paycheck. “I know how your feeling, sweetie. I can help.” She always thinks she can help me, but I know she can’t. Not since Rasimus died. No one can help me. I might as well die right now. I don’t answer and she finally goes away. I sit up, tears falling down my face. I don’t know why, but I just need to cry right now, for dad, for mom, for my step mom, for Rasimus, for myself. I really don’t know who I was crying for, or if I was just crying because I needed to cry, but I wasn’t about to stop crying just to figure it out. Finally, something breaks inside of me. I look over to the other door in my room, where my bathroom is. I am so glad that I don’t have to share a bathroom and that I don’t have to go out of my safe room just to take a pee. I would rather pee my pants or in a soda bottle then go out there where my drunken dad is. I slip out of my bed and head into the bathroom, still crying. I open the mirror door open and pull out my razor, watching it carefully, as if it will cut me into pieces if I turn my back on it. I set it on the side of my bathroom tub and sit down on the toilet. I haven’t cut myself since Rasimus died. Not since dad remarried. I roll up my sleeve and glance at my scars that I had on my upper arms. I roll up my pants leg and see the newer scars from when I had cut myself right after Rasimus died on the backside of my calves. I turn my head as a knock comes at the door of my bedroom. “Honey, I have the key to your room, you know, and if you don’t open the door right now, I will unlock the door, you hear me?” her voice doesn’t sway once as she says that. “Honey? What are you doing in there? You’re so quiet? Are you alright?” She bangs on my door once more. Then I hear dad’s large footsteps down the hallway. Oh, God. “What the hell are you doing?” dad demands from mom. “I thought I told you to leave the little shit alone! She’s nothing but trouble. If she wants to hurt herself, then let her. That’s not our problem.” “Like hell it isn’t! She’s our daughter!” my step mom says. A memory flashes through my mind of my real mom and dad having what seemed like their first fight. It was right after Rasimus died and I had first started cutting myself. I was in so much pain, mental and physical pain, and they didn’t even seem to notice until one day I came out of my room, my legs bloodied from where I had cut myself. Mom and dad were in the hallway, arguing about something and I stood in front of them until mom noticed. She screamed and rushed over to me, but I ran back into my room before she could get to me. I should have stayed out there. I could have saved mom from being beaten by dad for the first time. I could have kept her here, but instead, I hid in my closet with the door locked and I cried, cutting myself even more as dad beats on mom, telling her that it was her fault for letting me be alone with Rasimus. It wasn’t my fault. It wasn’t. It isn’t. Not my fault. Isn’t my fault. Never was my fault. Will never be my fault. It was an accident. I didn’t mean to. I’m sorry. It is my fault. He’s right. My fault. I let it happen, and now he’s gone because of me. I should have listened. I. Should. Have. Listened. That’s enough to make me go over the edge as I listen to dad beat on mom, who screams for me to open the door. I don’t. I should. But I don’t. Instead, I grab the razor and take apart the plastic, leaving just the razor in my sweaty palm. 12:42 P.M.------------------------------------------------------------------------------Zora I somehow make it back to my bed, where I slip under the covers, my legs and arms still bloody from where I had cut myself where I fall asleep, tears still covering my face. 7:24 A.M., the next day---------------------------------------------------------------Zora I awaken to a silent house. It seems too quiet to me. Whenever someone in the house has a bad day, or ends in a fight, the house is usually silent the next morning. Dad is probably still in bed, sleeping from when he dropped on the floor or the couch, asleep from drinking too much. I really don’t want to get out of bed. There’s a knock at my door. I don’t move, but my eyes shift to the door. I don’t know who’s on the other side, but I’m pretty sure that its either mom or dad, and I don’t think I could face dad because of last night, or mom because she’s probably all beaten up. But instead, I sit up and slip out of bed and I head to the door, where I unlock the door. I don’t even bother to open the door. Everyone in this house knows that if the doors unlocked, then you can come in. It’s mom. I almost gasp at what I see when she opens the door to reveal what dad had done to her. “Sweetie, your breakfast is ready. I was trying to be quiet because I didn’t want to wake your father up. How did you sleep last night? I know things have been hard around here, but things will get better, I just know it.” She sits down on the edge of my bed. I’m surprised that she hasn’t seen the blood all over the sheet and comforters yet from my arms and legs. I look at my hands. They have blood on them too. I nod, not sure what to say. “What did he do to you last night?” I ask. She sniffs and twiddles her thumb. I grab her face in my hands and force her to look at me. “I don’t know how you can stand to stay here with us. Look what he did to us last night. He beat you up because you wanted in. I know that I should have, but I was too afraid to let anyone in. And he pushed me over the edge, forcing myself to do this to myself,” I say to her, standing. Her eyes widen when she sees what I did. I close my eyes and fall to the floor, sobbing quietly so I wouldn’t wake him up. If he found out about this, he would beat on us even more than he did last night. She falls to the floor with me and we quietly cry, holding each other. “Why don’t we do something fun today and just skip school? Huh? What do you say to that?” she asks. My shoulders slump. No ordinary mother would say something like that. My real mother took me to a psychiatrist when I first cut myself. She told me that I was crazy and that I should be doing these things to my body. I ran away from mom as soon as we pulled up into the parking lot of the place. I didn’t come home for two whole days, and those were the toughest two days of my life. I had almost been raped by someone, and I was robbed by another, who only ended up taking a piece of gum that was already chewed up because that’s all I had left. I didn’t have money or anything. When I had come home, mom wasn’t there, and dad was sitting at the table, drinking. There were empty bottles lying on the floor and across the table when I entered the kitchen. I had asked dad where mom was, and he had handed me a piece of paper. I took it from his hands and read what was on the paper. It was a goodbye letter from mom. I shake my head at mom. “We’ll just get beat up more if dad finds out that I skipped school. Do you have to work today because I am so tired of being late for the bus after school? Dad doesn’t like how I am always late to come home and I don’t want to come home to dad like that again. I am so sick of him.” Tears fall down my face again. What am I to do now? My wounds looks like a cat took its claws to my whole body now that I look at myself. Even my step mom doesn’t know what to do with me because of what I do. So I sob more. Mom holds me tighter, shutting the bedroom door with her foot so dad wouldn’t hear. 8:13 A.M-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Zora Mom had dropped me off at school before going to school. She had picked me out an outfit that made me look like I was an Eskimo, but with thinner clothing. I had a hat on my head and a long sleeved shirt on and long pants long enough to where no one would notice that I had just cut myself the night before. I watch the ground as I walk to class in a daze. I know that I forgot to do my homework, and something inside me tells me that I will survive whether I pass the class or not. I even forgot to grab my sketch pad. I’m glad I didn’t. I don’t want someone else to find it and take it away from me. Dad would be really mad at me for taking it to school again behind his back. Someone behind me laughs. I turn slightly to see a girl that I recognize that hangs out with Megan. I ignore her, but then she starts laughing really loudly. I stop and turn around. “Is something funny?” I ask angrily. She stops and gasps, her eyes wide like she couldn’t believe that ‘the freak’ just talked to her out loud. “You talking to me, freak?” she asks, shoving passed me. She knocks into me, causing me to fall over. But I don’t fall all the way over. Someone catches me, grunting as they do. “What a bitch,” a male says. I can’t see with this stupid hat on my head. I take it off to see who it is. I frown when I see the new guy holding me up. I move out of his arms, hoping that I didn’t blush when I looked at him. “Hey, you okay? She pushed you pretty hard.” Go away. He doesn’t. Instead, he follows me as I enter the school building. “So, what’s your name? You must not have heard me yesterday when I asked you. My name is David, by the way.” I pick up my pace, heading for my locker. I stop in front of my locker and turn the knob until the locker swings open. I rummage through the stuff, but I don’t have much to go through considering that everything is at home. I slam my locker shut and turn away from him, but he stands in front of me so that I can’t move unless I go around him. “You’re a quiet one, aren’t you?” He studies me for a moment, but then I start to get a little freaked out, so I move out of the way. Someone behind me laughs. I turn to see Megan and the girl that had shoved me talking, whispering, pointing at me. “Did you see what I did to her? It was so funny. She was all like, ‘do you have a problem?’ and I was all, ‘not really. Get away from me freak’. And she was all, ‘I’ll make you pay.’ And I was all like, ‘oh, yeah, well, I bet you make everyone pay, just like you made you brother pay, right?’. It was so funny. Then she tripped and fell to the ground, but then that new guy rescued her.” They turn from where they were and glance over at me. “Awww…how sweet. Her hero is talking to her right now,” she says a little too loudly. People turn to glance at me and I duck me head. “What the hell? Do these girls always do this to you?” David asks, narrowing his eyes at them. I almost laugh. It would feel nice to laugh again, but I don’t think I ever will. David glares at the girls some more until they turn and leave, laughing over dramatically until they turn the corner and I can’t see them anymore. David looks back at me, but I turn and leave. “Wait, where are you going?” he asks. He jogs up to me and I stop. “Look. Thanks for doing that for me, but I don’t think that this is a good idea. You don’t even know me, and I don’t even know you, so why are you even talking to me?” I ask in one whole breath. I can’t believe that I am actually talking to someone who hasn’t been mean to me yet. He stops too and looks at me. And I mean, really looks at me. It started to creep my out, so I turn away from him. “What do you mean? Oh, when I caught you so you wouldn’t fall? That was nothing. It’s fine. You’re welcome, by the way.” He smiles and I can’t help but feel like he really means it. Wait, what am I thinking? No. I cannot let someone get to me. “Why are you even talking to me? We don’t even know each other,” I manage to say without breaking into tears. I swallow, and I can tell that my tears are about to escape any second now. I really couldn’t deal with this right now. Just go away. No, stay. You’re the only friend I have, even if I don’t know you. No, I take that back. Go away. I don’t need someone to follow me around. Go away. You’re the new guy that no one wants to start hanging out with. Stay. I don’t care if people stare. You’re real. David smiles again. “Because I think you’re nice. You’re not like other people,” he replies. I snort. “And your going to just judge me because I don’t talk all that much?” I ask in a whisper when someone walks by, calling me a slut. David turns to the boy who called me that. Hey! Shut the hell up, jerk!” He yells, letting it echo down the hallway. The boy turn and smiles, fakes salutes him and turns the corner. David turns back to me and shakes his head. “Why don’t you ever do anything about these people? Do you just let them walk all over you?” Tears finally do escape my eyes and I burst out sobbing. David cocks his head to the side, and then brings me into a hug, and I immediately tense up and pull myself from his grasp. I run into the nearest bathroom, where I cry my eyes out again. 12:00 P.M.-----------------------------------------------------------------------------Zora I don’t know how long I had been in the stall, but I am pretty sure that its lunch time now because there has been more bells than I can count. Everyone is here, in the bathroom, talking and flirting. They are talking about plans for the weekend or how they would like to get into the new P.E. teacher’s pants because he’s really hot and sexy and all that boring crap. I don’t move from the seat in the stall except to move my feet up so that no one knows that I am in the bathroom at all. “Can you believe that that stupid new guy turned me down?” Megan’s voice. I look down under the stall and see eight more feet, which means that her whole gang of girlfriends are in here. Great. Just what I need. I hold back a sniff so they wouldn’t hear me. “I mean, who would even think about turning me down? No guy in their right mind would turn me down. I even offered to do whatever he wanted me to do, but no, he didn’t want me. He said he wasn’t like that. Well, I guess he’s getting what’s coming to him for hanging out with the brother murderer. He’ll find out soon enough that that Zora girl isn’t what he thought she was. She’s going to end up killing someone else. You know how murderers are. They need to keep killing. If she did kill someone else, I would want it to be herself. That way she wouldn’t end up killing me. I mean, I wouldn’t care so much if it happened to someone else, but not me. I don’t want to end up having my perfect body ruined by some psycho chick that went and killed her own brother.” I clench my fists together and grind my teeth, but I don’t say anything. A single tear falls down my face, but I ignore it. “Can you believe what she said to me this morning?” The girl who pushed me down. I close my eyes and tune her out. I really don’t want to hear this story over again. I must have dosed off because I snap awake when someone banged on the stall door. “Come on! I need to fucking pee! I know you’re in there; I can see your feet! Stop ignoring me! All the other stalls are filled! Come on!” Oh, crap. I wonder what time it is. “Uh, hold on. I was taking a crap,” I say. I immediately want to take that back. Man, that’s really embarrassing. Who would want to know if I was taking a crap or not? Surely I wouldn’t want to know that if I was her. What am I supposed to do? I really don’t want to go, not while she’s there. She’ll go and tell the whole town practically and it will just end up all over the school. I don’t think I could handle that. Thankfully, the bell rings again and she groans and leaves. “Thanks a lot, now I’m late for my next class.” The door slams shut behind me and I listen for the rest of the girls in the other stalls to wash up and leave. Once their gone, I leave the stall and head out of the bathroom. 2:50 P.M.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------Zora I don’t have anything to work on in art. I sigh and sit down at my usual table, and thankfully, that David guy isn’t there. I don’t think I could handle seeing him right now. That was so embarrassing when he hugged me when I started to cry. But my luck is never good and in walks David, right when the late bell rings. He smiles and waves to Mr. W, who nods to him. Mr. W must like David already if he’s nodding to him. He never nods to people he doesn’t like. I think it is like a respect sort of thing. Maybe it’s because David is good at drawing. I toss that thought away and instead I turn and pay attention to something on the table. It’s a paint stain. I scratch at it, but it doesn’t come off. “Hey,” David says, taking a seat where he had sat yesterday. “How are you feeling? Any better than this morning?” he asks, as if nothing happened. It’s okay, though because he doesn’t understand me very well. I nod to him, but I don’t say anything. I turn and pay attention to Mr. W., who is talking about our next assignment. I have already taken this class twice now, and I already know what he does. I’ve done this assignment twice, and each time I get better at it, I think. But I don’t have my sketch pad with me, so I can’t draw anything. “Why are you so quiet?” he asks, raising his eyebrow at me. I turn and face him and I notice that his hair is shorter than it was yesterday. Maybe he shaves it off. I shrug. He sighs and rubs his temple. “Okay, here’s the thing. People talk around here, right? Are you following me?” I nod, not really sure where this was going. “Alright, then. And since people talk, things that aren’t true like to be spread around. Right?” I nod again. “Good. You’re still following me, right?” I nod once again. “Okay and people are saying things about you that are probably true. Can I name a few?” he asks. “What have you heard about me?” I ask in a whisper, not making eye contact. I don’t think I could stare at him if I was forced to. “Well, like how you’re suicidal because your brother died. People are saying that you killed him. I don’t think that’s true. You don’t look like someone who could commit such a thing. Please, I am just trying to figure you out here. Help me out. I know that you look harmless, but I would really appreciate it if you would talk to me. Just looking at you tells me that you’re in a lot of pain.” David actually looks like he cares. I stop. Mr. W. is taking role. My name is coming up soon, so I wait until he does. “Zora Airvita?” Mr. W. asks, looking towards me. I nod to him, and he returns the nod and writes something down in his attendance book. I glance back at David. He’s looking at me strangely. “I was hoping that you would be the one to tell me your name, not a teacher, Zora. I like the name. Does your family own a vacuum cleaner company because your last name sure seems like it would be one.” I frown and he stops smiling. “Sorry, just thought I could try and cheer you up.” “Well, it doesn’t help much. And why would you want to know me? I’m nobody. Everyone here hates me. No one wants to be friends with someone who tries to kill herself because she’s grieving over her dead brother.” I say this without actually meaning for it to slip out of my mouth, but it does. Just go away. I don’t want to talk to you. I’m nobody. Stay. I need someone to talk to. Please, I’m begging you. Leave. No, stay. Leave. Stay. Leave. Go away. I don’t need you. Yes, wait. I do need you. You’re so handsome. No. I don’t need you. I don’t need you. Wait, please don’t go. I clutch my head with my fists and I bang them against my head, trying to make the pain go away, but knowing that it won’t go away. I’m getting one of my stress headaches. I really don’t need this right now. I open my eyes to see David staring at me. “What are you looking at?” I demand, frustrated. “Your arms. Are you okay? It almost looks like someone or a cat or something scratched you.” He reaches for my arm, but I pull away, not quick enough, though, because he grabs my arm, but gently. “What happened?” he asks, pulling up my sleeve. I yank my arm away from him and yank my sleeve down to my wrists. I look away from him, wanting to stand up and leave, but this is my favorite class, and I am not leaving just because someone is being mean to me, and plus, I have missed all my classes except for this one, so I think that I need to go to my last classes of the day. “Nothing happened,” I reply in a whisper, still not making eye contact with him. I wish he would stop bugging me. So instead, I start naming off phobias that I know off the top of my head out loud so that I wouldn’t have to listen to him anymore. I’m not even sure if these are real, but what the heck, right? “Albuminumphobia, fear of kidney disease; Philemaphobia, fear of kissing; Genuphobia, fear of knees; Xenophobia; fear of racism or chauvinism; Olfactophobia, fear of odors; Bromidrosiphobia, fear of personal odor; Acoustic phobia, the phobia of sound…” Defecaloesiophobia, fear of a painful bowel movement. Metallophobia, fear of metal. Claustrophobia, fear of small spaces. Eremophobia, fear of who you are. Eruethrophobia, fear of blushing. Ergophobia, fear of work. Felinophobia, fear of cats. Francophobia, fear of France. Frigophobia, fear of the cold or things that are cold. “Zora?” David asks. I glance up at him. “Do you need to go to the nurse’s office? You’re rocking back and forth. Did I say something to make you freak out like this.” David stands and walks over to my side of the table. “Don’t touch me!” I shriek at him. He holds his hands up in the air like he did the first time we were in here together. I stand quickly, but my brain isn’t acting the way it should be and I almost fall over. David catches me, but I squirm out of his grip. “Let me go!” I start to cry. “Please, let me help,” David whispers to me. My whole body seems to be shaking. My mind shuts down and my eyes blur up with tears. David drops me. I think. I can’t be sure, though. But I feel something slam into my body. Maybe it’s the ground. Need air. Can’t breathe. Need air. Can’t breathe. In and out. In and out. That’s all it takes. Breath in and out. I can do this. Icantbreatheandnothingiscomingoutandineedtobreatheicantdothisanymorejustkillmenow. “Help! Mr. Whitetaker! Something’s wrong with Zora!” I can hear David screaming at Mr. W. What’s he doing? “She’s having an epileptic seizure I think,” Mr. W. says. “Call nine-one-one someone! Now!” Unknown time-------------------------------------------------------------------------Zora “You’re going to have to look out for your daughter, Mrs. Airvita. She’s had a small seizure, caused by uncontrollable amounts of emotions. She’s had them before. Did you know that, Mrs. Airvita?” someone says. I don’t want to open my eyes. In fact, I don’t want to do anything right now. In fact, I just want to lie here and die. No one would miss me. Not even my own dad, who probably isn’t here right now. I bet I’m in a hospital. I finally open my eyes, though, even though I don’t want to. I can see that I am in a hospital. I turn my head, but I don’t see mom or dad. I don’t see anyone at all. I turn my head to the other side of the bed, facing the window. I about to scream, but David stands and slaps his hand over my mouth before I can. “Shh…it’s just me. Your okay now, Zora. You had a small seizure. You’ll be fine though.” He lets me nod before removing his hand from my mouth. “What happened?” I ask, tears flowing down my cheeks. He smiles sadly and wipes my tears from my face. “I told you,” he said, then stops. He listens to the doctor. I listen to. “But I am watching out for my daughter, doctor. She’s all that I have left. I don’t understand what I am supposed to do. Her father, my husband…well, he isn’t the best, you know? But he is good enough to her.” “Ma’am, your daughter is suffering from depression. I want to put her on antidepressants for now. She cuts herself, and that’s not healthy. Does she eat? Does she show signs of any vomiting or binging?” the doctor asks. I blink and more tears fall down my face. What am I supposed to do now? I don’t want to live anymore, but there are people out there that care about me. I turn my attention back over to David, who looks like he wants to cry to. “Zora, I want to tell you something. And I have never told anyone else this in my entire life. The only people that know about this are my family.” I smack my hand over his mouth this time. “I’m sorry, but I don’t want to know. I don’t even understand why you would even think about talking to me. You don’t understand me, I don’t understand you. There isn’t much more to say about this. I don’t want to be friends with you, can’t you see that? I am glad that someone doesn’t hate me, but—” he removes my hand from his mouth and counters with his hand over my mouth. “No, you listen, please. I want to be your friend. I know who your father is and I understand what he did to you and your step mom was very wrong. I totally understand that. It doesn’t bother me that your suicidal or that your brother died or that no one at school likes you because your shy and different and beautiful and all of the above. I want to be your friend because you were the first person to actually listen to me. And don’t say that you haven’t listened to me because I’ve seen it in your eyes. I saw the way you looked when I first showed up in art class and the look you had when you watched me draw. I know this all sounds really, really creepy, but you have to trust me. Not everyone is going to be there for you, not your mom or your dad. But I want to be here for you. I want to know you.” He smiles down at me. My eyes widen with more tears. Now what am I supposed to say to that? I’m not just going to stop being the way I am just because someone understands me. How could he possibly understand me? I’m nobody. He’s everybody. He might not know it, but he’s one of them, not one of my kind. Well, one of a kind, anyways. He leans down. What is he doing? Oh, no, please tell me he doesn’t want to kiss me. I’m not ready for that. No. I will never be ready for that. Yes, kiss me, David. No, don’t you dare or I will stab you will this IV in my arm. No, I wouldn’t do that to someone else, would I? Yes, I would if he got any closer. Oh, man. His lips look so good. No, I don’t want this. I don’t even know him. I don’t even like him! Why am I always thinking oppositely? Because I’m a freak, that’s why. No, I need someone to comfort me. No, I don’t. I don’t need anyone. I’m perfectly fine without someone. He leans in closer to me and I reach for my arm. I pull. I wait for the kiss. He finally makes it to my lips and I yank the IV out of my arm. Can’t breath. I need air. I feel like I’m suffocating. My heart’s racing violently, and not in a good way. I stab him with the IV. “Ow! What the hell?” he asks, bringing his lips away from mine. He reaches for his arm and I finally realize what I had done. The needle is sticking out of his arm. I sit up quickly. “Oh, my God. What have I done?” I yell out loud. I grab the IV and yank it out of his arm. “Oh, my God. I am so sorry. I wasn’t expecting that. I’m so sorry, David.” H calms down after a few seconds and leaves. I don’t know what to do now. Is he going to turn me in? Is he going to join the group of Hate Zora Airvita Club? Oh, God. I’m so stupid. There went a perfectly good guy that actually had a small speech about me, telling me that he didn’t care if I was suicidal and that it didn’t bother him. What am I thinking? You don’t need him. He can take care of himself. Yes, I do need him. He was actually trying with me, and I let him down. Well, who cares anyways? What’s one person that actually likes me going to do? He probably hates me now. I gape at David as he returns with gauze over his wound that I had given him. He has a smile on his face. He walks over to me and sighs. “Not only are you suicidal, but your also murderous. I like it. But seriously, I am totally sorry. I thought we were cool now. I bet you hate me now.” He looks down at the floor. I blink a few times. What? I was just thinking the same thing. What is it going to take to get rid of this guy? Murder? Heck, I’m not capable of that, am I? No, but when I think about it, I had just stabbed him with a needle that I yanked out of my arm. The sudden realization comes to me. I look down at arm and see that I had bled all over the bed. I scream. “Oh, my God,” David says. He runs from the room. So much blood. I can’t think straight. What have I done? It feels like my life flashed before my eyes. I want to die now. No, I don’t want to die. People care about me. No, no one cares about me. David cares about me. But he doesn’t even know me. So what? Who cares if he doesn’t know me well enough? He still came back, even though I stabbed him with my own IV. Why am I so stupid? I slip into unconsciousness. Unknown time-------------------------------------------------------------------------Zora Thisisnotgoingthewayiplannedmylifetogo. I wanted my life to be filled with people who love me. That’s the way it was, until Rasimus died. It was my fault. I’ve been telling myself this whole time that it wasn’t my fault. Everyone around me tells me that it’s my fault. Their right. It is my fault. It happened while making breakfast. Rasimus was on the phone, talking to his boss. He hangs up the phone, angry. I grab something from the cupboard. I think its salt for my eggs, but its not. I decide to give the eggs to Rasimus because I was feeling sorry for him because he just lost his job. He sits at the table and I decide to make myself some cereal instead because I’m running late for school. This was when I actually cared about life and school and people and how I looked. “How do I look?” I had asked Rasimus, who took a bite out of the eggs that were supposed to be for me. He gives me a thumbs-up and smiles, letting a few scrambled eggs fall from his mouth. I giggled and kissed him on the cheek and made myself a bowl of cereal. I never really liked cereal all that much, but it was all that we really had in the house. Mom walks into the kitchen and kisses Rasimus on the cheek, who does the same to her. Then dad shows up, tucking his shirt into his pants while trying to make a tie look like a tie, but miserably failing at it. He stops in front of mom, who chuckles and fixes his tie for him. He gives her a kiss. I finish my cereal and wash my bowl and dry it and place it back in the cupboard where it belonged and went to brush my teeth. When I came back into the kitchen, Rasimus was sitting at the table, looking at his eggs. “Rasimus, are you alright?” I had asked him. Mom and dad glance over at him, hoping it was nothing. He nods, then walks out of the room, not bothering to wash or dry his dishes. I smile and take the plate from the table. I notice something strange about the eggs. It almost looks like there’s something like pepper in the eggs. Rasimus doesn’t like pepper because he’s allergic to it. We don’t even have any in the house. I pick at the strange-looking substances on the plate. I pick one up and smell it. I know that smell anywhere. I scream and rush over to the cupboard. With shaking hands, I pick up the rat poison box that we keep in there for when we have rats. We haven’t had any since a long while, but it was there all the same. “Mom!” I scream. Mom walks back into the kitchen and sees the look on my face. “What’s the matter?” she asks. I can’t say it. So I hand her the box and point to the eggs that are sitting on the edge of the sink. She doesn’t understand for a second. “Oh, my God.” She drops the rat poison and it spills all over the floor as she runs to find dad, who runs to find Rasimus, who we all find lying on the floor, dead. Things were a blur after that. We had an autopsy on Rasimus, and it was the rat poison that had killed him. He had been allergic to four things in the rat poison. It wasn’t the rat poison that killed him. It was the stuff in it that had killed him. And I let him die. I killed him. We buried Rasimus a week after we found out what had killed him. Unknown time-------------------------------------------------------------------------Zora I don’t know where I am. I open my eyes and see that I’m in a different room, probably in the same hospital. Someone or something had woken me up. I think. Maybe I’m dead. I have always thought that when you die, its like you never died at all and your in the same room and clothes that you died in. I’ve always wondered what it would be like to die. “Zora,” a familiar voice says in a whisper. I turn my head to the left. No one. I turn my head to the right. No one. “Its me, your big brother.” I scream. I scream loud. I must be dead if I’m seeing my dead brother right in front of me. “You’re not real! You died!” My dead brother shakes his head. “I am dead, your right. But you are not far from dead.” He walks over to me and kisses my forehead. I sob loudly. “I killed you, Raz. I didn’t mean to! I’m so sorry!” Tears blur my vision all around me, but I can still see Rasimus as clear as day. I must be dead and he’s just playing a trick on me because I killed him. “I killed you,” I manage to say out loud again. He hugs me to him and lets me sob onto his clothing he died in. “I need you to be strong for me, sis. I want you to live and have a happy life. People on earth care about you,” he says. He lifts me up out of the bed and faces me towards the window. But I’m not seeing anything from outside. It’s my house. Our house. Mom—my real mom is there. With dad. He has a soda can in his hand instead of a beer bottle. He’s actually smiling. I watch as mom and dad hug and it bring more tears to my eyes. “I don’t understand,” I finally say, glancing at Rasimus. He nods, and then takes me back to the bed, but he doesn’t place me back there. Instead, I see myself, sleeping in the bed. I look like I lost a lot of weight. David is there, and so is my step-mom. David looks so much older. He has a beard and a mustache. I notice that I look a lot older too, so does my step-mom. She’s crying and David stands and rubs her back. They embrace each other in a hug. “I can’t believe that she tried to kill herself again. I thought she was doing so well with you, David. You’ve been together for almost ten years now,” mom says. Ten years? “She looked so happy at your wedding. I don’t understand what went wrong.” Wedding? David nods and I watch a tear fall down his cheek. It gets caught in his beard. He doesn’t wipe it away. “I know. I have no idea. I thought things were going well enough too. She didn’t seem to be depressed anymore. I try and give her what she wants, but I don’t think any of us can give it to us.” Mom nods, then flops back down in the chair. Then the doctor comes in, his head down. “This is the third time this year that she’s tried to kill herself. Is she still taking her medication?” David and my step mom nod. “Well, actually, I don’t know,” David said. “I think she is. She says she is. She seems so much happier, and then this happened. Why do you think she keeps doing this?” “She’s too gone now, I’m afraid. She’s going to die the next time she does something like this. She seems to be slowly dying from the inside out, I’m afraid. It’s not something we can stop.” He walks out of the room. Rasimus smiles sadly at me. “You’re going to keep trying to kill yourself until you eventually do die. I don’t want my sister to die. Not until it’s her time.” The moving picture of me and everyone else disappears and Rasimus lies me down on the bed once again. He kisses me on the cheek and leans in to whisper something to me. I scream. Tears sting my eyes, but I don’t care. “Rasimus!” I scream. David grabs me by the arms and holds me, rocking me back and forth. “Rasimus came to me, David. He came to me. He told me that it wasn’t my fault that he died. He told me not to worry about him anymore because he’s in Heaven with all the angels that love him. He told me that,” I say. I move away from David. He’s searching me for something that I don’t know of. “I know. You were talking as if he was sitting or standing right here. You said things like, ‘I don’t understand’ and ‘ten years’ and ‘wedding’. What does that even mean? Do you want me to get the doctor? He told me to if you awoke.” I swallow and nod slowly. He stands, but before he does, I grab his hand and squeeze it. He almost looks surprised. “And you know what? I’ve been coming here for a long time now. Its good to have you back.” A long time? What did that mean? He was joking right? He isn’t because I almost laugh out loud when I finally notice that he has a beard growing on his chin. The doctor comes in a few seconds later, smiling. “Good news, Zora Airvita. You’re good as new. Just don’t cut yourself anymore. And just to let you know, you were in a coma for almost ten years. It’s really good to have you back. Would you like me to call your parents?” He looks down at the clipboard in his hands. “Uh, a Martha Airvita and a Ron Airvita, am I right?” I nod. “Wait, what? I am so confused. I was just in a coma and your not even going to check to see if I’m fine?” I demand. He nods. “We will once your family gets here. I want you to celebrate before you go into a coma again,” he jokes, winking at me. He turns and leaves, leaving me alone with David. I glare at him. He chuckles and sits down beside me. “I am so sorry. I should never have kissed you all those years ago. Now look where it got you. I made you go into a coma somehow.” He sniffs. This must be hard for him. I shake my head and laugh. “I don’t care. I’m glad you did what you did.” He gives me a strange look. “Someone showed me that life is more important than self-pity.” “You were in a depression, Zora.” “I don’t care. How long have you been coming here?” I ask, taking his hand. He glances at our hands intertwined for a long time. “Ten years, six days, five hours, and so many minutes and seconds,” he says, laughing. His laugh was choked off by tears. “I love you, Zora Airvita. I always have no matter if we had only known each other for that short of time.” I smile and grab his face in my hands and I kiss him. I consider this my first kiss. When we pull apart, he pulls something out of his pocket. I already know what it is. “Yes, I will.” I say. He gaps at me, then smiles. He pulls the ring out of the ring box and slips the ring onto my finger and kisses me like it was the first and last time we ever kissed. 4:32 P.M. Turns out, the whole entire time that I was in a coma, mom—as in my real mom—got back together with each other and my step-mom found someone who—till this day—still takes really good care of her. And it turns out that my step-mom never really loved dad like she always said she did, but she loved him in her own way. I don’t blame her for getting a divorce, though. David and I married and we have two children. I haven’t thought about dying since I awoke from a coma all those years ago and I feel happier than I have in so long. It feels so great. Yes, it does. No more arguing with myself anymore. No more telling myself that I don't belong. Publication Date: April 16th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-gooses
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-wendy-luis-anastasia/
Wendy Luis Anastasia A Little Insite I'm about to turn 18 in a month. What sucks out of everything is that my birthday is during school I have always envied people who have summer birthdays. Well like my mother used to say tuff cookie. She got killed last month with a lot of the other pack members when concuring the silver moon pack. My pack calls me shrimp due to my height but it seems all the girls are taller then me in the pack. Can you blame them I am just 5 feet. I always thought I was a late blumer and that's why I don't look as hot as the other wolfs. The only thing i'm good at is fighting. If you saw me at first you would think you could take me down in one hit. They clam i'm the first red wolf that has been seen in a while. They say that a monster always comes after people like me with special abilities or so they try to scary me to behave. At first I thought it was true. I mean what is a child to believe. My red hair is all that stands out in the whole pack even my mom could find people to have white fur as her wold but never red. I always feel like the one left out even though my pack loves to have me around. I know that a lot of wolfs would love to be my mate or so i'm told by my friends. I have my honey eyes they all ways seem to have a tent of green in them. Cynthia always says they are mostly green when i'm happy. Unlike Cynthia or any of the other female wolfs i'm skinny and have a few abbs.  Which is sexy to some guys at school. I look good with a tone body but do have good boobds to stand out for a small chick. I wear a 34D and my butt is tinny but purky if i say so myself. Most girls think they can talk down to me but after a few trainings they not to bully me. I just can't wait to my birthday when we invite a lot of other packs in the hope to find my mate. The Unknown Truth "Stop running down stairs" Luke yelled out to me. "Your not my mom luke." "No, I'm not Ana but i'm alpha so stop!" He always like putting me down espacially infront of his mate. You see luke was rejected and became alpha cause of my mothers death. "Ana just cause you have a red wolf doesn't mean your alpha." " Brother please stop i'm going out to go out with cynthia and the girls." I hated when he acted like that but let it go cause I know how it felt to loose mine I can only imagine how it felt to loose a mate. " I'll be back before dinner. I know it's a school night. Love you bro bro!" He gave me a kiss as I walked out the door. I walked into my baby. Which is a silver Ferrari 488GTB that I loved so much. As I was pulling off Mike run up to my car. He tapped on the glass to make it roll down. " What do you want Mike?" "Please let me come you know the girls love me around." He said in his most sexy voice. I mean don't get me wrong the girls did love him around. But it seemed like if he liked me a little too much. " Okay what ever. Get in their waiting!" We drive to the beach we live in California and love to go to a private beach we own my long beach. We get their and all the girls come to help me with the stuff I brought to eat for us. I always get stuck bringing the food i guess cause im always the last one there. Not cause i'm lazy but being next alpha in charge takes a lot off work. " Hey girls! how is the water?" Cynthia is the first to answer "It's okay. I wish more of the guys would have came." I laughed. " You mean you wish Mike's brother could have came." You see Nick was Mikes older brother by two years. He hasn't found his mate but she clames he is her mate she just can't feel it yet cause her birthday isn't intill another five months. " What ever Ana!" "Well I know I hope Mike is my mate." Claudia says looking Mike up and down. "You Wish Claudia." Claudia acts sad and pouts her lips. " I think you'll find someone better just you wait." Elle and alex where busy arguing like they always do. "Now what is the whole commotion over here." I say while putting my hands around thier necks. " Elle says that she was going through are pack history as a book worm she is and found your real birth cirtificate. That your birthday is today one min before Middnight." "That isn't what I said. I told you the legend is the one that has it written that way okay. But I did look and your birthday was today and today is a full moon. It states you will come to turn today and gain your true form you hide. Ana are you sure your birthday is not today?" I thought long and hard. Now that I think of it I have never seen my birth certificate. I always went with what my mother said to me. " The truth Elle I don't know if I have ever seen my birth certificate." I stated. "Can we have fun at the beach please I don't want to hear the legend today. Almost every year they try to scare me with that story. I've had enough." Mike noticed I was getting up set he picked me up and ran. "What are you doing?" "Making you have fun." He said as he through me in the water. He then grabbed claudia which he saw her jelousy and through her in the water too. The Foggy Truth  We arrived five min. before the pack was getting ready to eat. I love how everyone sat at the table and tried to get along even if we all were in arguments at each other. It was tradition for our pack to sit down and enjoy are selfs the rule was always no fights at the table. Which the little one's allways tried to get away with. " Your home sis finnaly. I though you would want to move dinner to the beach." Luke said while messing up my hair. " You know I wouldn't miss dinner for the world. Plus I have something that has been brought to my attention." "What is it sis? Can it wait after dinner or do you want to go to the office?" I thougth of it for a momment and decided I was too hungry to wait till later. " If I was you I wouldn't wait?" I turned to see who was talking to me. I was the only when in the living room cause luke and mike had left me in the living room. " You are finnaly ready." I heard it again but I didn't know where the voice was coming from. Intill it hit me! I was my wolf maybe she has woken up finnaly." " Are you my wolf?" "Yes, Their is a lot you must know don't wait till 12:00 to find out. My name is Ray." I heard about awakening your wolf. They say it is wierd at first but your wolf is a second part of you that helps you out and warns you about a lot of things. I desided to eat then speak to my brother. We ate everyone was having a fun time. Mike sat next to me and tried to flirt with me and the girls like always. We all teased that he was secretly guy cause he hanged out with us more then the other guys. Once dinner was over I got to talk to my brother but by then it was 11:00pm. I know their wasn't enough time is my wolf awoke so it was time to get down to work. I walked in to luke office as i followed him in. " So what did you need to talk about?" "Well Elle brought up the legend of the pack. And well I had a few questions to ask." " Ana Please let me Elle didn't look up the pack history with out alpha permitions. Legends are for alpha Knowelege only and you know that?" " Well you know Elle." I justured with my hands. He looked mad and then he sat deeper in his chair. " What did you find out?" I waited a few seconds thinking if I sould tell him the truth. I knew Elle would get in trouble. " Just tell him before you change forms in the room." My wolf told me as she sounded worries. " She said my birthday was not in a few days it's today before midnight. And other stuff but the main thing is that I think I was born today." I said really quick hopping he would only catch on to my birthday being today. " What? I didn't read that in the books the page was blank. Are you sure she didn't use her ability to see what is written on the bottom of the legend? Ana it is important you know your mate will become for you and he will not stop to find you. Their is a lot of diffrent things that happenes when a red wolf forms." "No, She didn't say that. She just said my birthday is today and my wolf can talk to me. What do you mean my mate will come for me?" He looked at me worried. " I'm going to tell you the legend as I take you to the Trainging room. If your wolf is awake the only place that is safe is the training room." He looked at me and muttered something about having more time.   The Transformation  We where walking as fast as we could so for wolfs that was like light running for humans. " Ana I want you to understand your mate will be differnt. In some legends they state the strongest mate will come first. Their are creatures wolfs and humans have never seen and you will be the one to see them. There is through to be more then just humans and wolfs in the world but went into hidding. They say the red is their to protect and keep balance. It is known that the red would birth both wolf and creature. The say you will need to choose to stay with wolf or leave with creature. Reds have always left after seeing creature. Once they know that the wolfs are safe from the creatures. That is why they tried to scare you with the myth that you heard of. You do not die like in the myth but no one has hurd of a red to stay as history shows." As soon as we got in there it was 11:50. Just a few more min before 12:00 midnight. My brother hugged me before he opened the door and locked me in. "It will be okay Anastasia. I will be here for you." I whispered a thank you in my head before feeling my body in pain. I feel my bones slowley brake as they say the first transformation is the slowest. It feels as if my bones are braking slowler then time its self. I then turn into a full red wolf I am bigger as a wolf. I am at 10 feet I look at the mirror my eyes are purple but how can that be? " They are my eyes. Even though I am inside of you my eyes shine through." My wolf told me as I looked myself in the mirror. I was happy are training room was as big as a ball room if not any wolf would go crazy in a small space. " Do you think are mate is on it's way? What do you think he is?" I asked my wolf as I was getting excited. "I do not know. I only know what you know for now. Your abilities will come soon." I was puzzled wolfs could only have one ability even if they where alphas. But then again I'am a red wolf. I so wanted to stay in my wolf form but knew my brother's wolf wouldn't allow it. They are said red wolfs once trandformed do not need to follow any alpha if chose not too. But I felt like turning. I didn't want to be naked when my mate arrived if the legend was true anyways. So I turned back it took a while but didn't hurt as bad as transforming. Mate I was in human form when I grabbed a towel from the training room. We left towels just in case anyone transformed from anger which happened a lot to guys. It seemed like most girls could keep it under control after a week from turning. I knocked on the door to getting a bear hugg as I step half way out the door. "You transformed and turned back faster then the others." My brother stated too me. "Lets get you dressed. My wolf has located a diffrent smell then wolf or human closing in on terriroy. The guys know to let him in so there will be no trouble." I was so excited it i wasn't in a towel I would jump to hug my brother first.  Once I ran up stairs to hope in the shower I was worried that I wouldn't be good enough for my mate. My wolf kept on telling me he should kiss the ground I walk on. But once I went to change I didn't look fully in the mirror intill I was about to walk out of my room. I have a mirror on the back of my room I have always had it there so when I walk out I know I look good. I looked and I was a foot taller the only way I noticed cause my shirt fit a lil too short. My jeans looked perfect. Being short they were always a little to long but it seemed to fit just right. My butt said the same which I didn't mind. I looked at my eye and they looked fully green. I thought I was a completly diffrent person I didn't even recognize. I was lost in my looks intill I hear my brother yell. " He is here I think you would like to see him."  I run down stairs almost falling. Now I know why tall people have trouble running. When I go to the living room I throught I was DREAMING!!  "MATE! MATE!"  My wolf screamed in my head causing me to almost fall over. Before I could someone got to me it seemed like they came out of no where I was five feet away from where my brother was. When I looked up a guy with black hair and with blue tips and gorgues eyes stand infront of me. As i looked in his eye they turned dark blue and so did his hair. His face looked so amazing when he finnaly he stood up he came to be 7feet. I might have touched his chest and could have felt an eight pack. He looked slim but not too tinny. He was perfect down to his toned body!  "He is all ours. Or should I say Mine!"  My wolf seemed to want to take him then and their. If it wasn't for my brother and a few others looking at what happened. The dragon   "Hi. My name is Liam. "  I was in love with his deep voice. It sounded like angels singing. " More like a god that came to life."  My wolf decided to comment. She wasn't off I just never felt this way for no one before.  "Hey. My name is Anastasia. Most call me Ana or the guys call me red."  All I wanted to do so badly was kiss him so badly. " If you want it all you had to do was ask."  All of a sudden he leaned in and kissed me. I heard someone clear there throught and like that I remembered my brother was still there. I felt my cheeks heat up so badly I thougt I would burn my own face. " I wouldn't mind this meeting continue in my office. Of course If you guys pomise not too make things worse." "I promise Luke."  We started heading to my brothers office when I felt Liam touch my hand. I gladly let him hold my hand. I felt so many feelings of loning, lust, happniest, and excitment. At first I thought it was my feelings intill we got to my brothers office. Liam looked and the feeling changed from worry, to dought, and confusion.  "Are you okay Ana." " Yeah I'm fine Liam." " Are you love birds coming in the office or staying outside."  We all walked into my brother's office. Liam still sending confusing through me. We ended up sitting in my brothers couch while my brother sat behind his desk. " So Liam is it. So you where saying you know the other part of the legend we are clueless about." "Yes, Ana actually knows everything in a way. Red can actally look at past reds life and the outcome of it. She will be tested with three brothers that where born triplets all a diffrent creature." "What! I have to choose between boys to find my legend that is true to me. Not only that but i'm going to have to get pregnant and have twins one creature one wolf!"  I was so in shock. I didn't know what to say or do and I think Liam knew it cause I couldn't read his emotions freeley. " I know it's a lot to take in sis but everything will be okay. I know alpha and red are the only one's to know your true form would you like to show us or wait till you become what ever it is you are."  I looked at look angrly. " Really luke! You don't have to be so mean to him and demand to see or know what he is."  "It's okay red. I don't mind I know a lot of alphas demand worse."  In that he turned to something so big and beautiful. His scales where just like his hair. I think my mouth was on the floor. I thought I was totally dreaming intill."  Your a dragon!!"  Luke yelled out. Dragon's Past I felt so light headed when I saw him transform. I felt my body go limp and everything was black for a moment.  "Did I black out."  I said trying to reach up for help. When I stood up I was somewhere else in a meddow. When did I get here? "You first meet here before vampires died. Before a lot of creatures died."  My wolf told me. Everything felt so real but I knew it was a memory of a red before me. " Ray is this still you?" " Yes, I am the reason you can always see everything before in past lifes. Just wait a little longer you will see why we are here."  All of a sudden I see someone come out of the woods. It was a dragon almost look like liam but had red scales with black. " All your past mates do not look the same. But all where so sexy to look at!"  I was a little excited to see him in human form when ray sayed that. But then it seemed like it was winter now. Someone ran up to me and hugged me. He was so sexy he looked a little taller then liam just more bulky.  "My choice is you."  I don't know where the words came from but he kissed me. As I enjoyed the kiss from a past mate I felt flames. I was then in the same meddow running to a wall. I stopped real quickly too look back. I saw that all dragons where coming to the wall and flying back through. Fire was coving the medow and a town not to far. I saw wolfs running the oppisote way. " Why do they not come with?"  I asked out loud not knowing my mate was their.  "They do not wish to come so dragons will now be behind the wall with the fairies. You just killed all shape shifters like you for making a war with humans, wolfs, and dragons. They tried to kill you and the wall with it. As long as you live the wall will stay up."  I was so in shock by the past wolf had to do. I knew now that something big was going to come and that is why I was born. "Will wolfs ever join us behind the wall?"  "Not unless you allow them to join baby. You are the one to deside when it is time for humans to never see any of them again."  I wonder is that why I am seeing this I chose him once before will I choose him again. I was felling a little out of shacky. I felt dizzy again.  "It is time to go back. You need to find other mates to know what you must do. The dragon was the last to come this time but he is the first to come now."  Okay i'm ready to go back to luke and liam. Take me back ray i'm ready. I told her in my head. All of a sudden everything went dark again. Back to school!  I woke up in my room. I looked down and was in my pjas last time I left I was wearing something diffrent. " Hello."  I yelled out to see who would come. I head someone run out the bathroom to the room. It was Liam that only had shorts and a towel around his neck. " Are you okay ray. Is something wrong with red? Will she ever be back?"  I was so confused. Why did he call me ray first.  "I took over before you left this time. I walked you to your room changed you and put you in bed. I told the boys when you wake if everthing was okay you would wake. If not I would have enough time to give another message before you choose to come back."   So in a way I can see past lives of us but not without leaving my body almost helpless. " That's right!"  So know that I confurmed a new ability I was ready to see my second mate. I wanted to get everything over.  "I'm okay it's me Anastasia. How long was I out Liam?"  "A whole week. The good thing you woke up on the first day for school. I almost thought I would have to go alone."  I jumped off bed. " What you would go to school without me. The girls would try to claim you are their's you are MINE!"  I yelled I didn't know if I spoke for me or ray. But I had a feeling I spoke for both of us right now. I ran past Liam and hoped in the shower. I took a quick shower but then stopped when I got out the shower. " You had to take a shower and not grab a towel!"  Ray yelled in my head. She was right now I need a towel and those are a cross the bath by the door. Liam would see me. I desided to run for it but as I was running back someone pulled the towel.  "You don't need that while i'm here."  A guy said with blond hair honey eyes and very tan. He looked a little older then me but was tall and bulky. " Mate!"  My wolf yelled in my head. I droped to the floor to cover myself as I did the towel feel on top of me and Liam ran in the restroom.  "Are you okay red I heard you run and then fall to the floor. Did you fall?"  My face felt so red. I think I look like a tomato by now from so much blushing. I looked up to liam looking so consurned.  "I think your brother has the ability to teleport."  I stated super embaresed. I felt him try to calm down but felt his dragon get mad. I knew he would transform. I hugged him so fast I fell on top of him good thing I had my towel cause my brother walked in looking angry.  "Pack meeting Now!"  He yelled in alpha voice. I shook my head and ran to my walk in closet. I through on lace bra and undies. Just in case his brother was to see me almost naked again. Then through on black skinnies with a green top and leather black jacket to go on top. I ran to get my bag and white converse to match my bag. Once I was done I grabbed Liams hand and ran down stairs. My brother just started his announcments for today like always.  "As you know Liam is new to the pack. Anastasia just awoke. She will be protected by liam today. All packs most go to school and if you notice something strange around them report ASAP. We might be in danger as you know in the legend. Anastasia is the only one that knows what is to come once she meets all three mates. Any questions."  I raised my hand cause I wanted my brother to think he was still alpha in my eyes. " Yes."  My brother said calling for me to ask. " Do not be alarmed but I think my second mate may be around at school. His ability is teleportaiton. I didn't see him well but he visited me this morning."  Everyone started whispering when they noticed my diffrent looks. My brother got the packs attention by clearing his throut. " Thanks for the update. You are all free to go to school please be safe." All my pack that went to school all got in the cars assigned to them. You see we could not show humans we all lived their and had tons of money so some would get rides from others some would ride the bus. I got to ride my own car sometime Claudia, Elle, Alex, Cynthia, and Mike. I was one of the few senoirs to have a sports car so they loved to come ride with me. Today I noticed claudia going in the football guys car. Which I didn't mind. I walked up to my car and opened the door. Liam hopped in the front seat. While I was getting in cynthia asks for a ride.  "Hope on in or you'll ride the bus with Elle and Alex today."  She shook her head and ran in the car. Right when we where about to start driving mike nocked on the window. I rolled it down. " Yes mike." "Please ana let me drive. I want to empress everyone on the first day and claudia will talk to me again."  I knew he probably pranked her agian while I was out cold. I just took a deep breath and let him drive. " You better take care of my baby or you will die."  I said in my most threatning voice. First day of School  We arrived a little late only on purpase. My brother had to make sure pack didn't arrive all at the same time. We got out the car and my wolf wanted to take control. I tied to calm her down. She was only acting like that cause a lot of girls where trying to get Liams attention. Right before I was going to run off Liam pushed through them and grabbed my hand. A lot of the girls got upset and when away. Show whispered they would get him later.  "Thanks."  I told Liam. He just smiled at me as we walked up the stairs to our school. " We better go get are schedules before we are late." "That would be awsome babe."  I blushed when he said that we picked up his schedule and was the same as mine only second and study hall where in diffrent classes. I hate AP Math while he had basic and just diffrent study hall teachers.  Our first class was History which Liam said he loved. I'm suprised he didn't take the AP class. He just stated to me that then he would have one less class to spend with me. In science we had assigned seats that would deturmain are partners. Cynthia sat with Liam which made me happy. Don't get me wrong my wolf was mad. Intill I explained that he could have sat with mike or brenda the class whore. I could tell mike was jelouse by the way he acted all rude against Liam. I got to sit with Ethan. Me and Ethan where friends intill middle school when he stoll my bra from gym class and put it on the flag poll. So science went by so slow I longed for Liam but Ethan seemed to like to drop my stuff. I was so happy when it was over. Next was english which I loved almost as much as history. Even though my best subject is Math. In English claudia passed a note. She said that Ethan had to be my human mate. I laughed intill she told me her ability on the note. I asked my wolf of this and she stated I didn't touch him so she wouldn't know. So my goal was try to become friends with Ethan and get him alone so hold his hand. I don't want another ride to the past so quickly. In art I tried so hard to clear my head but everything a drew came out to be claws, hand prints, scales, and wings. I love drowing to take stress out but things where getting out of had. I was happy to hear the bell ring for lunch.  "Liam I forgot my purse in the locker. I'll be right back." "Okay red don't take too long someone might take you away."  I gigled as he kissed my cheek and left. As I walked down the hall I felt wierd like a pressence.  "I can feel you near me."  I whispered Knowing only one mate's name was to be left to discover. I didn't want to force it so I'm thinking Ethan will touch me when it is my time but i'm worried my second mate mite claim me without choice of who I choose.  "I wish you where better naked little red. I know that is what your body wants."  He whispers in my ear. I know it was him how his voice made me want him. I turned around to nothing.  "Silly red it's not time for us to fully meet. but I tried to be first so badly but liam was stronger."  I was a little sad not to see him yet. I kept walking right before I left him I felt someone grab me. He had his hand on my waist.  "Close your eyes so I don't disappear."  I did as told I felt him kiss my neck. I never wanted to stop intill. Some one pushed him off and hugged me.  " You will not take her not now not ever. You caused to much and that is why you will never touch her again."  Forth Mate! I saw someone with green eyes if they where apart of me. Unlike Liam or Ethan who looked almost a like he was diffrent. He was almost 8 feet tall. Big frame yet skinny in a way. He looked like a model no flows. " Now He is a creature of goddess."  My wolf screamed. Before he could touch me he was gone. Mist took him away along with the other mate. Liam came running down the hall screaming my name. I felt my ears ringing. I could see on Liams face he was talking but yet my ears could not here anything.  "I need my brother Liam. Take me to him I can not hear. He is the best Healer their is in the world. Take me to him please."  I sow Liam run up to Cynthia and tell her something. I would guess to call my brother and check us out. After he ran back picked up our things and me along with everything. He ran to the roof and then took on his form he carried me to a maddow. Then changed behind some bushes. I memorized this same meddow was from my vision or so it looked like a half copy. I think meddows was just where the dragons loved to be. I then started playing the green eyes in my mind over and over again.  "Everything will be okay. The power of the reds is trying to block his path of memory. Another red must have blocked it away from you."  Great now my body is going through hell. I felt myself transform all the way. All the pain came back worse. It felt as is the transformation got worse. How could that be? I waited in my wolf for my brother. Thinking of my mate with green eyes to come for me. In a way I knew that he was the key to something but what. I wanted to stop. My head was spinning my ears where rinning. I then sow a bright light come to me. I felt it all around me almost hugging me. Then I heard a women voice. " Don't be afraid my child you will live. Just let the image go. Do not hold on to him for he is the key to distruction. He is an evil to the world."  After I took what she said I let him go. I told my wolf to be happy with the mates we got. I mean we already got three mates do you really want another to maybe break his heart. She is the same and let him so a peice felt happy. Another one wanted him still their. My armed burned for a little but then stopped. When I looked at it it looked like an arror that went around my arm. I heard a voice that didn't sound like ray.  You will not eliminate me as a mate. I have hidden in most past lives but when I show you will see I'm not the only evil mate you have. For the first brother of mine is always favorite but never chosen. I warn you red to not mark dragon for he will bring fire to the world.   Betrail So Two months have passed since school started. It is now October the biggist party is always on Halloween. It seems like the whole school dresses up to go show out at the pack house party. Only the humans don't know about us so we all claim it's my party. Yes so it falls on my sholders to through the most awsome party if not everyone will shame me in school. If you ask me I think it's total bullshit but we try to show out so the house doesn't seem out of place. All school knows of it that no costume means no getting in through the gates.  I was busy talking to ray of how to do this and handle everthing going right at the same time. I decided to try to call cynthia after school but it seems like she isn't any where to be found. When I tell Liam to help out he said he would on every friday but I get to see him for 1hr of help and then some how he always runs off some where. I was getting so feed up so today after school I was going to confront Liam. It was the last friday to plan and get everything cause next friday is the party.  So today past by almost every borring day. Everyone was talking about dates they would bring to the party. First period past by so fast. While second period was passing so slow. I got done with all my work and was planning what I need to get before the end of class. Ethan I guess noticed my fustration and ask what was wrong.  "Ana I know we havn't talked in a while but can we be friends again."  I took a deep breath.  "Ethan I would love that. I'm lacking a friend right now so sure." "Ana do you mind me asking what is wrong?" "Not at all. I'm just having trouble with the party." "I could help lil red if you need it. If you want I could help today and tomorrow."  I got so happy and took a little less stess off my back.  "That would be nice I'll give you my number in math the bell is about to ring."  Just then the bell ran. It seemed like liam was right by my side when it did. Liam put is arm around me and we walked out the class room.  "Little red please tell me you not letting him help."  He was the one to talk. On that note I walked away. He has some nerve to tell me something like that. It seemed like he was never around. The rest of the day I didn't see him.  "This is your fault that he went away all day."   He was not being a good mate now leave me alone. It seemed like everyone was on me. At lunch I went to the libary just to relax and then the rest of the day went by fast. In last period in math I sat by Ethan. He did try to speak to me. I gave him my number but when the bell ringed I ran to my locker to find Liam. Lucky I saw him going around the corner to the gym. I was running after him but before I pushed the door open I heard people talking. " Liam are you or are you not going to tell her. I just don't care if she is your mate you are to be with me!"   I heard her try to whisper it.  " I will tell her just give me time. You don't know how it feels to reject a mate. If I felt jelouse with that Ethan guy. You too are driving me crazy." After Liam said that I heard the door open it was CYNTHIA!!  "That bitch I will rip her to peices!!"  Ray yelled in my head. I felt so dizzy I wanted to faint. Then I felt someone touch my sholder and I blacked out. The human mate  I was using my power. It was too stong to stop it.  "If you fight it your power will take longer to see your vision. Just go to it and you will last an hour using your power."  With that I let myself go. Everything was black for a while then I saw someone run to me. He was the opposite of Ethan but he was still handsome.  "Princess you need to leave the wolf pack is after you."  He grabbed my hand and we ran down the stairs. I almost fell when he picked me up like a bride.  "You should be more carefull princess. I don't think your true mate would like if I got scraches on you."  I felt like touching him but before I could he started running again. We were in a tower hidden behind a secret wall. He put me own gently as not letting go of me.  "Princess I know you are not mine but I hope in another life I will be the mate you choose. I know you need to know what I truly am but maybe in the next life you will truly find out."  I was so confused. I didn't know what he ment. I touched his face before I could kiss him or confort him I drifted off. It seemed like a time diffrence. I was with a fairy holding me tight.  "Little red I will always love you. I know you chose the dragon. But I always fall under a protecter. I was told never to be the chosen one enless the dragon is blue. Please remember things are not what they seem little red. I might not ever be chosen but you will always be in my heart."  Just as I was about to comment on the blue dragon I woke up. Ethan was beside my bed. So I guess he will be the my the one I will pick. How do I know he is the right one. He has shown me a lot but stated everything so confusing. So he will never be chosen but is my protecter. But the dragon is blue so will he be my true mate? I was so confused and had a bad headache. I wish I could hide under a rock at this moment.  New Power  I looked over at Ethan and then he looked shocked. I couldn't tell his feelings but when looking on his face something was wrong.  " Ethan, What is wrong?" "Ana I can feel you but can not see you! What are you?"  I knew I was going to have to tell him something.  "Just tell him what you are. He is your protector."  I was still thinking what to say when he huged me.  "Ana it's okay you are not the only one with secrets." "Ethan I really want to tell you but I don't want to scare you or hurt your feelings."  He hugged me a little tighter.  "I'm happy Ana that even though I have pushed you away you still care for me. I thought you would never talk to me again."  I wanted to cry. He just struck so much emotion into me. I almost felt like I could tell him anything.  "Then tell him the truth!"  Ray yelled in my head. Just then he looked suprised.  "I can see you again. I thought I would never see your beautifull face again."  He leaned in and was about to kiss me when the door slammed open. I got scared and held on the Ethan's hand.  "She is mine Ethan you do know that. You are so weak that you never tell her the truth. You better keep your hands off of my red. When she comes back tell her I need to talk to her."  Ethan nodded and Liam stormed away. I couldn't believe he could not see me. I guess I need to get used to my power.  "I think I should stay it seems like I'm the only one that can see you right now."  He was right but What was Liam talking about? I wanted to know more and how did Liam and Ethan know each other. " They are brothers!"  "Ow Yeah I forgot that thanks ray." "Who is ray?"  Ethan asked looking at me confused. " She is my wolf." "I'm happy you are open with me I thought you would never tell me."  He said as he rubbed the back of his neck. " Did you know about the legend?"  I was so shocked did the three brothers know who they were. If so why didn't Ethan tell me. I started getting so many questions that poped in my head. " I know a little only what was told by me from my mother. You see my mom gave birth to us but had to give my other brothers to our father. One would live behind the wall while another one would live with the pack closest to you." "Wait so your brothers know who I am? Did you know we where mates?"  I didn't know to be shocked or angry. How could he not have told me.  "I am your protector I do what is best for you. I don't know exactly what is comming or what the future holds. I can only say what I know. We didn't know who the red wolf would be. In most legends she transfroms to her true form on her birthday. I never knew it was you." " Okay I understand Ethan. I was just worried you that you knew all along."  It was a quiet between us for a few minute intill I heard my brother call me.  Control I ran to talk to my brother. I bumped into a couple people but i guess I was still invisable cause they looked at me as if they where confused. When I got into my brothers office he looked alarmed.  "Who is in here?"  He asked in his alfa voice.  "It's me Luke. Your sister can you not see me?" "No, It's feels wierd not seeing you as we speak. Is this your new power?" "Yeah I wanted to talk to you about what is going on."  He could hear the worry and sadness in my tone.  "What is wrong little sis?" "Well it is Liam and Cythia. I think Liam is cheating on me with her. I just can't beleive this is happening. Cythia was my best friend. We used to be so close but she has been distante lately and Liam only sees me at school but disappers almost everyday."  I guess my powers where down cause my brother came and walked me to the couch in his office. He let me cry on his sholder and he rubbed my back.  "Well I knew this true mate this is diffrent. I mean being rejected by a mate hurts. Who knows maybe you just looking at things in the wrong light. I mean I know Ethan is your other mate. So maybe it wasn't ment to be with you and Liam. Just let things play it's corse. You still have one more mate you have not meet. Plus how do you know the last mate is not your true mate."  He was right. What am I thinking he is almost always right. That why I was happy he was alpha. He took a deep breath.  " I think you need take a break from school. Just try to focus on controling your powers. I will send information with Elle."  I shook my head yes in agreement. I almost forgot Ethan was in my room when I opened the door.  "Do you want me to spend the night little red or go home?" "Please stay with me for tonight."  He got on the bed agreeing to stay.  "Tomorrow we can start picking up the stuff you need from the Holloween store little red. Lets go to bed we have a long day tomorrow."  I just layed in bed and snuggled up to his chest. Are legs were intertwined. I didn't care that he was wearing just his shorts. Mean while I was fully clothed. I was too sleepy to change before I knew it I fell fast asleep.  NEXT MORNING  " Wake up Ana before someone comes in and thinks wrong."  Ethan was trying to shake me awake. I kept on acting like I was asleep. I wanted to just stay in bed today with him. Even though I knew I would have to get up soon. "I'm going to tickle you little red if you don't wake up."  Right as I said that I felt his lips at the corner of my lips. Right when I was going to lean in I feel him start to tickle me. I was laughing so hard and wiggling every where till I fell off the bed. All of a suden my door opened. I was Liam!  "So I see little red that you will let this mate in bed but wont even let me kiss you. I thought you didn't have it in you brother. I guess you have made her your now. Did you tell her?" "Tell me what?"  I looked at Ethan confused.  "It's nothing little red. He doesn't know what he is talking about."  Ethan then looked at Liam.  "You don't even know what is going on. You just lying to her like always. I didn't mark her or have sex with her." Liam with a blank face replyed. " It's not like you would be the brother to do it first."  With that I  lost my temper.  "GET OUT OF MY ROOM LIAM."  As I said that A gush of wind blew him out and closed the door. I looked at Ethan.  "Did I do that?"  He nodded yes. I got up and went to my closet.  "I'm a take a shower I think you should go home and get ready. We can meet up in the afternoon to go pick up the stuff for the party." "Okay little red that sounds good with me."  The Suprise I got in the shower and got ready to go do my things as second alpha. I mainy take care of all the pregnant women and the things that need to be done before pack meetings. I usually help with the things that my brother forgets to do to make pack happy. I know I don't have to check up on a lot of things but still do so they know we care. It got close to lunch so I desided to txt Ethan.  Lets meet up at the Halloween store in an hour. A few min later I got a responce.  That sounds fine with me. I'll see you then. An hour later I was waiting outside the store. Ethan walked up to me and hugged me.  "Hey little red ready to grab everything we need."  He asked looking a little nervous. I shook my head yes and grabbed his hand when walking in. It felt so right that I think I could feel ray purring like a cat. It made me feel greate.  " So red what is on the list."  I took out the list and we started grabbing everything. Ethan tried to make small talk as the time went by. We got all the cups, plates, and decorations needed for a huge party. Felt like we bought most of the store. The lady at the front looked shocked when she rang everything up. She just asked to pay and to swip my card. I could tell she was suprised my car cleared. She got less shocked when she helped us put the supplies in my car. How I love my car so much. When we where done I felt so much better. I knew I still had to call people for lights and etc. for the party but one thing off the list is better on me. You see I love to plan parties but when I do I love to get everything done before so I can have fun too.  We hopped in the car and I started driving to the pack house when a question came in my head.  "Ethan what did Liam mean by if you told me yet?"  I felt a little nosie but I mean I did have a right to know.  "Well I don't know if I can tell you yet. When I tell you it will be the first in history. So I kind of want if to be special if you don't mind."  He is so sweet.  Ray said in my head.  "I understand Ethan. Just forget I even asked. I just don't know when to keep to myself." "Little red you know that is not true you look after everyone that is just how you are."  He was a little right but sometimes I did feel lost like I don't know what to do or say to my mates. We got to the house and the pack came and to help with all the things we bought.  "Ethan, Would you like to go out to get something or do I have to take you home." " I really wish I could stay but I have to go my mother called. She wants me home maybe next time."  I droppe Ethan and then decided to go home and train. I knew Mark would be down there at this time and wanted to talk to him about costume ideas. Unlike the other girls I didn't want to go as a slutty princess or slutty anything. So I just wanted to know Marks idea of something to look sexy without showing too much skin. I walked to the training room. As I walked to the training room mike was coming out.  "Just the person I wanted to see." I said as I jogged up to him. He looked at me confused.  "What for? It's not like you have time for us normal people."  I was so taken back I could feel wind blowing. I took a deep breath to calm myself. "You know it's not like that Mark. You know I just had a lot too do. Plus we always run costume ideas by each other. So are we matching this year or you going to abandon me like freshmen year."  He laughed and put his arm around me and we walked to my room. Besides Mark and my mates no other boys would come in my room. Well except my brother of corse. He knew I loved being in my room. " Your not still on that. I'm sorry I thought I told you I was going with brenda. She forced me to wear that costume. You know I was humiliated." " I know just trying to give you a hard time. Well I was thinking I could be a pirate. What you think?" " Where you not a pirate last year come on show a little skin if you are being a pirate no pants little red."  I let out a deep breath. As we got to the room there was something diffrent. Mark opened me the door and we sow an angel costume. It looked like a little too sexy for my taste but I loved the winds. " Don't tell me you chose out my outfit for me Mark. What am I five?"  He laughed trying to be nice as he answered. " Little red I didn't get that for you here it has a note."  He handed it to me. It read Please wear this at the party. I would love to see you as my angel. As I will finnaly get to meet you without running off. I can't wait to see you at the party. Your Sexy Mate  Mayson "I guess it seems I will get to meet Mayson or My wolf mate at the party after he tried to break the rules."  Mike looked a little woried. " Are you sure it's a good thing to incourage this behavior. He might think of you as a play toy dressing you up like that."  I busted out laughing. I couldn't believe Mike was acting jelouse in front of me. " It's okay Mike I promise I wont let him touch me."  That is what you say not me.  Ray stated in my head. At least I didn't promise I told ray in my head.      The Party  The party was finnaly here. It was me the girls and of course tag along Mike. It seemed like he was trying to help the most with the parties after he found out what my costume was going to be. I looked around the room it seemed like someone was not here. Then I noticed Cynthia was no where to be fine. Wind started blowing things around the room. I closed my eye and cleared my mind. She was the least of my worries at the moment.  "Do you guys know where Cynthia is?"  Alex looked up and spoke. " I think I remember her saying she didn't have a ride or costume so she went last minute shopping with Jessica." "Yeah I heard that too."  Elle agreed. Mean while claudia had an ugly look on her face.  "Correction she went to steal red's date and try to find another costume to out shine you."  Alex and Elle looked shocked. We all know claudia speaks the truth and can be really blunt but the one thing she hated more then lies were back stabbers.  "How did you find out that?"  Alex and Elle said in union.  "Claudia and I were at the mall this morning picking up claudia's costume from the holloween shop and we saw them their."  I already knew who them where but even as Mike said it I couldn't help but tense up. I let it go fast though my powers didn't need my hard work to go to waist. " It's okay guys I found my human mate and am meeting my wolf one tonight. Plus maybe he wasn't my true mate after all."  Claudia looked at me happy and came to hug me. " This is why I love you because you know that true friends wouldn't betray you like her. You also don't tell thing like this put you down."  I enjoyed the hug intill Ethan walked in carring drinks when he bumped into us while not paying attenchion.  "Watch it Ethan if it wasn't for red I don't think you would be alive right now."  Claudia threated just then she smiled and hugged me one more time cause I guess she figured who my human mate was. " Your so lucky."  She said whispering in my ear. We all went back to work decorating and setting everything up. It was know 7:30pm everyone one was starting to come. Security was at the door making sure everyone wear a costume. They even had a costume as well and was getting paid for it. As I sat their waiting for my prince to come for me the music started so people wouldn't feel akward. An hour or two later everyone was here. I mean the whole school was here as well as some other packs. Almost all the young wolfs knew and looked forward to coming. I guess I did a good job.  Stop worring you did a great job. Your mate will be here soon I feel him about to arrive. Ray stated in my head. That made me even more nervouse. I went to the kitchen and bumped into some body. " Watch it!"  She then turned around it was claudia.  "You look hot! Who chose the costume for you cause you would never think of picking this out."  I smiled shly she knew me so well. " My mate asked me to wear it. So you have him to thank i'm so nervous though."  With that she walked off and came back with a cup.  "Close your eyes and chug it down."  I looked at her nervously and took it. I pinched my noise knowing it was going to be alchole and did as I was told. It burned so bad but after a few gulps it went down.  "That will help a little you might want a little more after a while to loosen up a little more. Just don't over do it okay."  I shooke my head and thanked her as I walked close to the dance floor. I watch for a while taking sips form my cup till.  Mate! Mate! MATE!  Ray yelled  in my ear. Okay I get it I told her back. Just thin he was infront of me. He wore a red shirt with a black jacket and red paints. He had a devil tail along with horns and spear.  "How creative. "  I thought out loud. " I know i'm the one that picked your costume remember."  I blushed really hard. " Will I have this dance princess."  With that I lost balance and he help me in his arms as my eyes closed. My power was now faster easier to use. In a few min I was able to see everything with him. In that moment I knew he could be my true mate. For he would lay his life for me in every life time. I would just hope nothing would bring him to it. As I looked up to see him he cupped my face in his hand and kissed me. I was so lost in him. It felt as if no one could compaire the affection. Everything else seemed meaning less but him. As I felt him push me closer I felt him stop the kiss.  "So will we dance or can we go some where to dance." "Lets dance."  I knew going some where else might end with me falling for are lust. Not a good way to introduce myself as a mate. " Well sound good to me either way as long as you are mine for tonight."  We then danced a few songs getting lost in are moves. It seemed the more I grinded to the music the more are bodies would become one. I wanted this moment to last forever to forget the legend of my wolf. I looked up and as he looked down he kissed me. Holding my waist to grind closer. I felt his dick rubbing on my ass. His hands holding me a little tighter as he depend the kiss. I then stopped the kiss to make sure It was him and not a dream. In that time he whispered in my ear.  "Maybe it's time to talk before I claim you as mine infront of all the humans in the party."  My body felt like yelling no. All it wanting it to keep the position we where in. All I could do is nod my head and allow him to push me out of the crowed with hims body still pressed on his chest. We went to the pool house where no one was allowed to go during parties. I knew no one would know of us being there. " So what do you want to know about me?"  I asked just to break the ice. " Well for starters you can tell me little red what is your name?" "Well Mayson my name is Anastasia but a lot of people call me red or Ana." "Well in that case you are now to be called princess only by me."  He stated as he sat on the couch. Before I could sit he sat me on his lap. " So have you disided who your true mate is or will you leave me behind?"  I was shocked by the question. In this moment I felt he might be but had trouble thinking do to the drinks in my system. " To be honest Mayson I haven't thought of it all the way. I feel like you might be the one but only time can really tell."  With that he layed me down on my back. He climbed on top putting almost all his wait on his arms. " What a perfect anser my princess. It seems as if I maybe in the lead." "This is not a competition you know."  I stated to him. He just smiled and leaned down.  "I know but I would like to say that I am the closet to being a true mate as you stated."  He said as he kissed down my neck. With a push he fell off the couch.  "How fun you like to play too."  He said in that he pulled me on top. I couldn't stand the teasing back and forth. It's like my body was exploding with lust and wanted him there and now. I kissed him and grinded on top of him. He then stroke my legs pushing his hands up my dress. I left a moan out. With that he picked me up and placed me on the bed. His dick teasing me making me wet. I let out another moan as we kissed. Letting him get access to my mouth. Allowing him to deepen the kiss and have him take off my wings. He moved my hear and dress from my sholder. Before I knew what he was going to do as he let go of the kiss. I relised he was going to mark me. When marked their was no stopping what came next. I let out a moan as he bit me marking me as his. With that I lost control to what happened and everything became blank.  The Matting process  I woke up with my head pounding. I tried to sit up but something was holding me down. When I turned to face someone it was Mayson. When I looked at him he looked peacefull it wasn't till I remember I was naked that everything came to me at once. My head pounded somemore.  "You shouldn't think to much princess it will take the fun out of it. I know you haven't made a choice but I would like to feel that I am winning you."  His confidence made me giggle. I loved that about him telling me what he thinks. I looked at him and gave him a peck on the lips.  "Maybe or maybe not I just hope my brother doesn't eat you alive for claiming me so soon."  Just as I said that someone nocked on the door. I got scared a little and that is when Mayson but on his underware and opened the door. I covered myself as fast as I could with the sheet on the bed. I was so suprised a little more when Liam walked in.  "So you give him this right but not the rest of us. I came to only make things fair."  As he walked closer to the bed Mayson got infront of his path.  "Only she can deside what is fair to her. What I can see is that your busy with another why you ignore your feelings. You hold back why I will find out."  He pushed past.  "Well till then I say that she should have my mark as well."  Before Mayson could stop him liam grabbed hold of my upper arm. All of a sudden I screemed out in pain. Liam went flying to the wall as Mayson looked at what he had done. It seemed to make a mark of fire on my arm almost like a tattoo. " You will pay for marking her when she is not wanting your touch."  Liam then smiled.  "We will see all I need her to do is touch me and we will be matted. I have gave her my matting symbol it is only fair with your bite you marked her with. Now it's up to are last brother to settle the score. Knowing his past he doesn't have the balls to make a more like that."  I was so mad how could he come to me mark me and then call my other mates out. He was running aroung with cynthia and still wanted me in his arms no thank you. " You say the past lifes have been kind to you but in this life you have yet to meet my touch how mayson has or spoke to me as gential as Ethan has. When I will choose you will not be thought of!"  I yelled. I could feel ray being a little sad and she knew it wasn't all true but we could not let him do that. In that moment Mayson grabbed me and we were all of a sudden in my bathroom.  "Princess I think you had to much fun and so much to think of just shower and change. You need to think and I feel my pack needs me. I will see you in school tommorrow my love."  With that he stood me up and kissed my forhead. With in another second he was gone. I showered and was thinking of what Liam said about Ethan. So I made up my mind I would ask Ethan to mate with me so he could have a fair chance. I didn't mean it to fall down to this but I know from all three of them Ethan was sweet at heart. I could feel butterflies in my stomach. I took a shower got changed before going to look for my phone. Text: Wen Luis All rights reserved. Publication Date: April 21st 2016 https://www.bookrix.com/-my9c4a89fbb8865
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-jojo14-my-life/
jojo14 my life hey i just wanted to try and write a book myself. it seem fun. i do not own these pictures. the story is mine though. so please don't steal. complete chapter one BEEP, BEEP, BEEP. I swift my hand over to the alarm clock slamming my hand down. It didn’t shut off. So I brought my hand over to the plug and unplugged it. I sat up in bed. Sigh. This is ganna suck. Stupid job. Why do people have to wake up at five in the morning to go to work? I mean really? Then I heard it. The whining. He’s up. I ran over to the next room. “Baby!” I say. Isaac looked over at me and started to laugh. Gee, this kid is weird. I mean who in the hell wakes up laughing. I’ll tell you who. Isaac. That’s who. Going to his closet, I picked him some cute clothes. I just love baby clothes. There so cute! I picked him out a polo shirt and blue pants with some socks. After I dressed him, I got ready myself. I threw on a pink breast cancer shirt and blue jeans. I looked in the mirror and study myself. I was naturally beautiful. I’m not bragging or anything but that’s what I hear. My hair is curly and black and it feels like silk. NEVER gets frizzy. Weird, right? Pshh yeah. I’m half Latino and half Indian. So I’m tan of course. What throws me off is my eyes. There like rainbow colors. For real I’m not even joking. My parents eyes are not that color. Or these colors, I should say. My brother has my mom’s big blue eyes. Well any way I’m 5’8 and skinny but I don’t look like a stick. I’ve got curves and a nice size butt and good size boobs. But I don’t show any of it off. Cause I don’t like creepers looking at my goodies. I went to my brother, picked him up, and went into the kitchen. I live in an apartment so yeah it’s small but a good size for a cute little family. I got me an apple and my brother a pop tart. Then I went to get my keys and purse to leave. I went to my old school looking mustang. It was my parents so I got to keep it. When I got to the daycare, I saw a new car there. Hmm must be a new parent, I thought. I went into the daycare to get ready to watch some moody little children. Isaac, of course, is free. I went into the front after putting Isaac in the back and saw a cute dude about 20 with a little adorable girl. “Oma gosh!” I said. The guy looked at me and had an expression on his face like “what”. I tried so hard to not roll my eyes, really I did. But they did it anyway. Stupid eyes. Moving on there own and stuff. “She’s so cute!” I said in a du kind of voice. He just smiled. “Oh yeah I know. She just turned two, five days ago. She’s my little sister. Mom and dad wanted me bring her to this daycare. I wanted to check it out first, though. Her names Zoe.” He said. I had a pang of jealousy in my heart. I missed my parents. “Well, hellos miss Zoe.” I said. Zoe looked at me and smiled real big. Pshh little kids love me. Why wouldn’t they? I’m lovable. The guy looked shocked. What got stuck up his nose all of a sudden? Zoe reached out to me to take her and I happily took the invitation. Zoe snuggled up to me and fell asleep. I was a little freaked. I mean, who goes to sleep that fast? I looked at the guy and got freaked out more. His eyes basically popped out of his freaking eye sockets. “Damn dude, you needa push those eyes back into your head before they get dirty from rubbing on the floor!” I said. “Isabel Grace Sanchez, you watch your mouth!” oh shit. I turned around and put my best puppy dog face on. “I sowy, Mrs. Valentine.” I mumbled. Jenny’s face softened a bit. “It’s ok, but remember not to cuss while you’re in this daycare. Don’t want the kids to pick up bad habits, now do we?” she said. The guy was out of his shock state and was staring at me. Stare much? I gave him the “what” look. “She never did that to a stranger before. Not even my ex-girlfriends. She doesn’t trust anyone except me and my parents. Hell, she doesn’t even talk.” He said. I made my eyes go big. “Aw! Mrs. Valentine! This guy said a bad word!” I tattled. The guy started laughing and Jenny stared at me hard. What? I was completely serious. “Ha-ha, ok now I gatta go to college.” I was like whaaat?!? “dude! Your ganna leave your little sister here on my watch and not even ganna sign the papers? Eh-uh. Nope. Not here. Sign these forms.” I said. He did what was asked and gave me the forms. I looked down. “Well thank you, Jake Michaels, for this info. The daycare closes at ten o’clock so yeah . . . Bubye!” then I left. I went into the room full of little ones. Te-he. They look like chipmunks. They were all asleep because it’s five thirty in the morning. I looked at Zoe in my arms. I didn’t even notice she woke up. “Hey there sweetie.” I said. “Hi!” she said happily. Ha-ha what now Jake!?! She spoke to me and not you. Psh I knew I was special. Wink, wink. I smiled so wide, I think I freaked her out a little. “So baby girl, what do you want to do while the other chipmunks sleep?” I asked. She looked around then back at me. “Aw, baby chipmunk.” She said. Oma gosh. This kid is adorable. I just want to squeeze her! I looked up and saw that Isaac was awake. I put Zoe over the drawing table and went over to Isaac. “Hi baby! What’s up? You want to go drawl with Zoe?” I ask. He looked at me then looked at Zoe. “Okay” he said. I took him over to Zoe and they started baby talking. Gee, I need to learn baby talk. It would be so much easier to listen to the kids. Zoe and Isaac started to draw together so I went to check on the other little kids. There are a total of eleven kids today. I went back to Zoe and Isaac to see what there master pieces look like. Isaac drawled a ‘truck’. “Zoe, babe, what did you drawl?” I asked. “smiley!” she said and handed me the paper. I was kind of shocked. Her ‘smiley’ looked like a freaking penis. I mean, it had it all. Yep, I decided this is definitely going on the wall of art. I went over to the wall of art and hanged up Zoe and Isaac’s pictures. I can not wait to see what Jenny has to say about this. Mohahahaha! two 6...5...4...3...2...1...0… “Izy, you can go now, babe.” Jenny said. “Yes!” I jumped up to get my stuff. Today was a very, VERY, long day. I had this little boy saying uncle fucka all day. Then, another kid that kicked me in my leg. Oh, how I wanted to give that kid a good ass whipping. I got ready and took Isaac from the back. I looked around and saw Zoe playing with this little girl that was trying to hit Zoe. “Jasmine, keep your hands to yourself, little girl!” I yelled. The girl turned around and stuck her tongue at me. Keep your cool. Trying to calm myself is hard as heck. I went over to where Zoe was and kissed her on the head. “Bubye, baby girl.” Zoe looked at me. Aw! She looks like she’s ganna cry! “Bye ithy.” She said. I gave her one more kiss before leaving. After buckling Isaac up, I started the car. I looked in my mirror to adjust it when I noticed something. “WHAT. THE. HELL.” I said. “Hell! Hell! Hell! Hell! Hell!” Isaac said happily. Oh shit. “No! No Isaac! Bad word bad!” why am I trying? He’s just ganna keep saying it anyway. I looked back in the mirror. My hair is turning white. EFFING WHITE! Oh god, I knew it. I’m stressing way too much. What if I get wrinkle? Does stress make you wrinkle, too? Am I going to look like an old lady by the time I’m twenty? Oh god! Ok, ok, calm down, Isabel, just calm down! I looked back into the mirror. I’m kind of getting a little pale, too. Ok just go on with your plans for today. I went to the restaurant that I go to every time I get off work. “Hey there sexy, how are- holly hell, Isabel! You got white hairs already!” my best friend Scylla said. “Oh, well thank you, I feel so much better now. Yes, I do. The next time you’ll see me, my boobs will be sagging on the floor.” I snarled. “Aw, Izy I’m sorry! But if it makes you feel better, you still make me want to turn lesbian. Even if you have saggy boobs.” She says. Eh, what a freak. But that’s my freak and I’m loving it. “Foos! I wan food, now!” Isaac basically screamed at us. Gee, problems much? “Lil boy, don’t you be getting an attitude with us!” Scylla said. I swear, they have a love/hate relationship. They always argue. I mean, when I went to K-mart they had a full on argument on which toy was better. So I ended up buying Scylla the truck and Isaac the red car. Yes, Scylla plays with toys. Its part of her. And it creeps me the hell out. “Ok! Guys stop fighting. Really Scylla? He’s freaking three!” Scylla just scoffed. “So! That doesn’t mean he can be rude to me!” I started rolling. Isaac was MAD. “Shut hell up, foos.” He mumbled. I stopped laughing. Scylla looked at me like what the hell did he say? Uh oh. Before she could blow up in the parking lot, I ran in the restaurant with Isaac. “Oh, waaaiiitteerrr!” I yelled. Everybody stopped what they were doing and looked at me. “What? Can a lady call for her waiter?” they just kept staring. “RUDE, MUCH?” I said very loudly. Oh yeah that’s right. I forgot about my creepy eyes. Then I remembered my hair. “Gee, people, just because I’m going white headed doesn’t mean you can be rude and stare… but are my boobs sagging cause I cant tell.” I asked while looking at my boobs. Isaac poked one. “Hey dude! I have sensitive nipples.” I said to Isaac while rubbing my poor booby. A waiter came over and got us a table. He looked like he was twenty and had black hair with green eyes. “What’s up, dude!” Isaac asked the guy looked at Isaac and smiled. “Nothing much, just taking an order from a pretty girl and her son.” He said eyeballing my boobies. Son? Oh, well he can keep on thinking that. Wait! He’s eyeballing my goodies! “Dude! Get your mother licking eyes off ma goodies!” I yelled. The guy didn’t even say sorry! Just rolled his eyes. “Hey you’re finally in!” I say looking at Scylla while she sends daggers at the waitress. Oh no. she’s ganna take all her anger out on him! Shiz. Oh well this should be fun. “WHAT IN THE HELL WAS THAT!?! HM? LOOKING AT MY BFF’S BOOBIES! EYE RAPING HER! ASSWHOLE DO YOU WANT ME TO GET THE MANAGER?!?! HU? CAUSE, BITCH, I CAN MAKE THAT HAPPEN!” she yelled. Oh man, where in the hell is the popcorn when you need it? I looked at the other waiter while mine was being harassed by my friend. “Oh, hey there. Can you take my order? Yeah I want one mini pizza with fries on the side. A seven up would be good with that meal an-“ I was about to take my order when something went BAM. I looked over and saw that Scylla had that guy under her on the floor. I looked back over at the waiter. “Also, I want a fish sandwich with fries and a coke.” I said. The waiter wrote everything down while looking at Scylla with big eyes. “You have very pretty eyes.” I said. The waiter dude looked at me and smiled. “T-thank you. So do you.” Awez! So cute! After he left I looked around and noticed everybody staring at us. Why are they staring? Oh, yeah, I forgot. I looked at Scylla doing some kind of wrestling move on the guy. “Scylla, Babe, let that guy go. He’s turning purple. Wait… he’s turning green now. Pretty colors.” I said. Scylla let him go and went to our table. She looks a lot happier. I looked back at the poor fellow passed out on the floor. Isaac and Scylla were playing with some toys I brought with me in the bag I carried. I looked outside. Sigh. Such a pretty day. three I woke up to hear the wonderful sounds of birds chirping. Man, I’m glad it’s Friday. No chipmunks for three days. Yay! I hoped out of the bed and looked at my alarm clock. 10:30am. Sweet. I’m up before Isaac! I went to check on Isaac, and then got some clothes to take a shower. After my shower it was 10:45. I ran in Isaac’s room. “Isaac! get up! You need to take a bath, stinky butt!” I heard him mumble from his little car bed “I not dinky.” Te-he. I ran over his bed, but stopped when I noticed something in the mirror. “HOLLY SHIT!” my WHOLE head is white! “shit, shit, shit.” Isaac mumbled in his sleep. I honestly didn’t care what he said. I’m to busy looking at my hair. I got my cell phone and called Scylla. “hey sexy” she said. “MY HAIR IS FREAKING WHITE! ALL OF IT! AM I GOING TO GET WRINKLES TOO? ARE MY BOOBS GOING TO SAG ON THE FLOOR TOMORROW? AM I GOING TO DIE AT THE AGE OF TWENTY? I SWEAR TO GOD IM NOT ON DRUGS! HELP ME!!” I screamed. I turned and looked at Isaac. HE’S LAUGHING AT ME! “Lil boy, if you don’t stop that laughing of yours, you are NEVER going to see your favorite mint ice cream AGAIN.” I told him. Ha, that shut him up. “NO! NO! NO! I SOWY ITY!” he cried. I was about to say its ok till I heard someone singing in the phone. “Do your boobs hang low? Do they wobble to and fro? Can you tie 'em in a knot? Can you tie 'em in a bow? Can you throw them over your shoulder, like a continental soldier? Do your boobs hang low?” I’m ganna kill her. I had to laugh though. I mean how could you not laugh? “Scylla you are one crazy bitch.” I whispered in the phone. Guess who STILL heard me? Yeah you guessed right. “Bitch, bitch, bitch, and bitch!” yelled Isaac. “Lil boy! What did you say?” screamed Scylla in the phone. I swear Isaac just turned a little pale. Why did I call Scylla again? I looked over at Isaac. “Isaac, why did I call Scylla again?” he pointed at my hair. “What’s wrong with my hair?” I asked. I looked in the mirror. “SKYLLA, MY HAIR IS EFFING WHITE!” I yelled into the phone. “Yeah, I know, you told me like, five minutes ago.” She said “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME!” I screamed. “Oh, my bad I thought you knew.” She said. I hung up the phone and examined my head in the mirror. Well, it looks like it has a little blond in it. Why my head? Out of all the pretty heads, it had to choose mine? Of course it had to be my head. Of course. Sigh. Back to reality. I took Isaac and gave him a bath. Then I let him run around naked. Hm… I wonder how that feels? I took off my cloths then slowly started to walk around. I feel… relieved and a little free! I ran around the room with Isaac. “Yay! We both naked!” yelled Isaac. “Yay, I know!” I yelled back. What? Didn’t think I’d do it, did you? Well, guess what? I did. And it feels AWESOME. four After I talked on the cell for about an hour with Scylla, I turned on the TV and watched a little about these gangs and stuff. I got an idea after I heard this guy that was in jail that had a nickname. Out of all the cool nicknames he could have chose, guess what he picked? No, no, go on, guess. Nope that’s not it. He picked sugar bear. SUGAR BEAR. This guy was big and buff, too. I guess he was too nice or something. I have no clue. So, after I watched a little bit more, I decided to give myself a nickname. I decided on pacifier. Yep, like a baby pacifier that they suck on? Yeah, you know what I’m talking about. I didn’t want the full name, so I chose paci. It’s cute. Now for Isaac and Scylla. Hm. I looked in the kitchen where Isaac was eating noodles. DING, DING, DING! That’s it! Isaac’s gangster name is noodle! I went over to Isaac smiling real big. He looked at me curiously. “Whot?” he asked. He says what weird. “Isaac, your gangster name is noodle!” I said happily. His eyes got big and rounder then they already are. “Cool!” he said. “Come on noodle (wink, wink) where going to the park!” I said. When we got to the park, it was packed. Oh shiz. I don’t really like being around other people. It gets weird. I looked at Isaac. He was way too happy, so I can’t go back now. We got out and went to an empty spot on the swing. I was about to sit down with Isaac on my lap when I felt it move. So guess what? I fell. WITH ISAAC IN MY ARMS! I looked at Isaac to make sure he wasn’t hurt. He wasn’t. Thank god. Turning around, I saw the asswhole who took my swing. This is EXACTLY why I hate parks. It was this girl that was smirking at me evilly. She looked about 19. My age. Oh hell no. “Um, hey didn’t you see I was about to sit there?” I asked. She looked at her fingernails then back at me. “Yeah, that’s why I took it before you sat on it.” She said in a du kind of voice. “Look, I had my little brother”- I pointed at Isaac next to me-“with me when you did that. Do you understand if he would have been hurt, I would of seriously beaten your ass”- I motioned to her butt… or back I should say-“I mean your back to a pulp.” She got up and went into my face. “Bitch, you wouldn’t of done nothing, hoe!” she yelled in my face. “Oh HELL NO! Bitch get your mother licking, ugly face out of my personal area, ass-face! Looks like your face switched places with your ass.” I said. Then she went on and smacked me. I am MAD. It started thundering. Hum weird, wasn’t like this a minute ago. “Bitch, don’t tut my titer!” Isaac screamed and hit ass-face. Ass-face raised her hand and smacked Isaac. I heard gasp. “OH HELL NO! BITCH DON’T YOU EVER IN YOUR ASS-FACE LIFE”-by this time I hopped on her and had her on the ground punching her ass-face in-“EVER SMACK MY BROTHER! HOE WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!? YOU ABUSING, CHILDISH, SKANKY, FISH-SMELLING, BITCH! BITCH I’LL PACI YOUR ASS!” I screamed while I was punching her face in. I felt someone lift me off ass-face and held me back. I punched the person in the face when I turned around. Oops. It’s Jake. “Isabel, why are you punching my girlfriend in the face?” he asked. I looked around me and saw people staring. Looking around, I saw Isaac crying by this lady. I got out of jakes grasp and went over to Isaac. “Noodle, are you okay baby?” I asked Isaac. He nodded his head. I looked back at Jake that was now helping ass face off the ground. “I wouldn’t of beat ass-faces ass-or back if you call that an ass- if she didn’t hit my brother! I swear to god, if she ever comes near me or my brother again, I’m going to beat the rest of the ugly off her face!” I yelled while picking up Isaac. “Is this true, Nancy?” asked Jake. “No, the bitch only got mad because I stole the swing.” Ass-face said. Jake looked at me expectantly. “What?” I yelled at him. “You need to say sorry.” He said. “Actually, that Nancy chick needs to say sorry to her and her brother. She hit her brother in the face, right after hitting her in the face.” A guy voice said. I heard everyone mumble yeah. I looked for the guy that said it. “Hey! Its you! The waiter with pretty eyes!” I said. He smiled at me shyly. Awz! It’s still so cute! I looked at Jake and he was mad. “Nancy were over. Again.” He said and left. Awez, Ass-faces looks like it’s about to cry. Bitch deserved it. I went over to waiter dude and studied him for a minute. He had blond hair with green eyes, he was skinny, but had a nice body. He looked like a ‘nerd’ as people call people. I don’t think any of ‘nerds’ or ‘popular’ exist. I see like this. There’s the nice people, then there’s the mean people. “Thank you, waiter dude.” I said and gave him a kiss on the cheek. He turned a pretty shade of pink. “Your welcome, and my names Jacob, but you can call me Jake.” He said. “I like the name Jacob.” I said smiling at him. I was happy. Really happy that this guy was here. I liked him. I looked at the sky and it was really sunny. Weird, it was storming a minute ago. I looked back at Jacob. “I like you.” I stated. He smiled real big. “I like you too, Isabel.” He said. Cool, don’t need to tell him my name. “Hey, do you want to go get something to eat? Me and Isaac didn’t eat dinner yet.” I asked him. “Yeah that would be great!” he said. So we went and got pizza. We talked a little bit and had fun. Isaac really likes this guy. “Isaac come on, we have to go! Stop hanging off Jacobs boob and lets go!” I yelled at him. “No! My booby!” he yelled back then poked Jacobs ‘boob’. Jacob was laughing cause of our little fight. I took Isaac and gave Jacob a kiss on the cheek. “Thanks for the lovely day.” I said. I was about to go when he pulled me back and gave me a kiss on the lips. Wow, this dudes lips are soft. Then there was a third set of lips. I pulled back laughing at Isaac giving Jacob a kiss. Jacob pulled back and was smiling real big. “Awe!” Isaac said. We all started laughing. I gave Jacob one last peck on the lips, while putting my number in his pocket, then left. This was an awesome day. five What is wrong with me? That’s the question I woke up to. I went into the bathroom and closed the door. I’m kind of scared to look in the mirror today. I did it any way. My hair is still a Blondie white color. My skin color is tan, but not my normal tan. Like a white person kind of tan. That’s so cool! I bet if you took one look at me you wouldn’t even know that I’m Latino/Indian. I was about to leave the bathroom tell I stopped. Something is tingly by my belly button. I lifted up my shirt. Holy hell! I got a… tattoo! It’s all colorful like my eyes. It looks like it has signs on it. He are my ideas of what the signs look like: Love, Nature, Ocean, elements of fire, earth, water, air, and soul. Then there’s the sun and some other ones. It goes from my belly button then goes down almost to the knee. It raps around my leg though. Oh, this is weird. I wake up and I have a freaking tattoo. I don’t even want one. Because, when you get old, they look all green and stuff. Like this guy came to the daycare had a tattoo when he was young that said hero, but when he showed me it, it looked like it said hoe to me. How did the e get all the way behind the o, I don’t know. I looked at it a little longer. Oh well. At least it’s pretty. I went to my dresser and got some clothes out. I picked out my pretty pink wavy top. It shows a little of my chest, so I decided to get a neon green tank top to go with it. Then, I got out my smiley face bra and the matching underwear out, too. Then, I went to get my shorts that got cut off at my knee. I started my shower, and then went to look for my shoes. I got my pink sandals and put them with my clothes. I hopped in the shower. I looked at the water in my hand. Hm. I wish the water would just stay in my hand. Oh… look at this! It’s so weird! It’s like staying in my hand! For real! Even when I spread my fingers, it still the same. Hm, I wonder… I let the water go. It’s still there! In the perfect shape of my palm! Oh man this is so cool. I need to show Scylla. How do I get the water to go down? Right when I thought that, the water went SPLASH on the ground. What in the hail am I? I have an idea. I hopped out of the shower and got dress quickly. I went straight to my computer. I looked at my tattoo that was sticking out from my shorts. I described it in the Google bar to try and see what the meaning is. One of the signs of the tattoo popped up. It said it meant leader pack of the lycanthrope a.k.a werewolf’s or shapshifters. Um, they mean dogs, right? That was the crescent moon tattoo thingy. I stayed there for a while looking up the rest of them. Here’s what I got so far. The heart looking one was the goddess of love. Then there’s also the water goddess, light goddess, and dark goddess. I looked down. Check, check, and check. The other tattoo is of the elements. I also have the tattoo of the ‘vampire’ queen. Then there’s the fairy queen and the witches master and a whole lot of other shit. Sigh. Oh wait here’s an article about if they are all together… if they’re all together on the one person, then this person is the most powerful person on the planet. Re-he-he-he-hilly? Ha. Yeah, of course the most powerful. OF COURSE. I stopped reading there, and was about to wake up Isaac when I got a text. Jacob-Hey this is Jacob. Would you like to go out today? Me’z-Hey Jacob, of course I would love to. Jacob-Okay yeah, how about we meet up at the park at 12:00? Am of course:) Me’z- yeah okay. I’ll be there dude! ;D Then I got a phone call. For reals? I answered. “Hey baby girl, it’s your aunt Linda! I was just wondering if we can have Isaac over here for at least a month. Please, I know you have work and stuff, so I wanted to give you a break. I know how hard it was for you for taking care of your brother since he was born.” She said. What?!? “Are you crazy?!? You want to take away my baby for a whole month?!? I think I’ll die! He’s my reason for living in this hell whole of a dump called a world!” I yelled in the cell. “Oh sweetie, it’ll go faster then you’ll know. Please?” she asked. She only wants Isaac over there because she can’t have kids. “Uh, fine.” I mumbled. “Yay! Steve will be there in… ten minutes?” Sigh. They planned this before I even had a say in it. “Okay, you had this planned all along? You know what just don’t answer that.” I hung up the phone and got a suit case ready. Then, I went to Isaac. “Isaac, mean old Aunt Linda is taking you away from me for a whole month!” I said. Isaac sat up in bed, wide eyed. “Yay!” psh. That was mean. I heard a knock at the door and saw Steven. I opened it. Then slammed it. He-he. I opened it again to see a smirking Steven. Steven liked me a lot. He was my fourth cousin. Ewe. Incest much? We went to Isaac’s room and got him ready. “Bye, baby boy. I love you so much. Steve, Babe? If you don’t be careful with my baby, then don’t count on living any longer.” I said. When they left. I fell on the floor balling. Guess what? My tears are colorful. I don’t care though. After my mini brake down, I looked at the clock and seen that it was eleven am. Oh, crap. I need to put some make up on. I went to my mirror and put on some light pink eye shadow. Then eyeliner and mascara. I didn’t need it, but I want to look a little nice. I looked at my hair. It was curly. It’s still wet. Darn, I don’t want it to be wet. Then, my hair was magically dry. I can get used to this. I looked at my hair again. It looks like some professional did my hair. COOL! I walked in the kitchen and looked at the clock. 11:49. how did the time go by so fast? Oh well. I got in my car and turned on the radio. What makes you beautiful came on by one direction. I sang along. By the time I got to the park it was exactly twelve. I got out and skimmed the park. There you are! I sneaked up behind Jacob and jumped on his back. “Ha-ha! Sucker! I got you now, fool! You’re never getting away! NEVER!” I said. He turned around but I was still on his back so when he turned around no one was there. He looked back at my face and smiled. “Hey, beautiful.” He said. I gave him a big kiss. “Awe! Your so sweet!” I said to him. He smiled real big. I looked up when someone cleared there throat. I looked up to a very pissed off Jake. What’s up with this dude? “Oh hey Jake.” I said. “Oh so you guys met already?” asked Jacob. “Yep, at the daycare. Also, there was the fight with miss ass-face. How do you guys know each other?” I asked. “Were cousins.” Mumbled Jake. “Oh sweet. Oh yeah, toots, we need to kidnap my baby! He’s at Aunt Linda’s about 3 hours from here. The bitch basically kidnapped him.” I mumbled. “Ha-ha. Babe, no. you need the time. He probably needs to see his other family, too.” He said. I wanted to cry. “Wait, you have a kid?” asked Jake. “Yes. Well, he’s really my little brother, but basically, he’s mine.” I said. “Where’s your parents?” asked Jake. “Jake.” Jacob said. “No, it’s okay. The day after Isaac was born, we got into a car crash. I saw the car first, so I got out of my seat belt and hopped in front of Isaac so no glass could get to him. My parents died instantly, since it was head-on. I had to get 10 big pieces out of my back and 29 little pieces. It took me like 20 minutes to heal. I guess I’m a fast healer. So when the doctors left, I went to where my brother was. He was in good condition. So I took him and left. They didn’t know I turned only sixteen that day my parents died. They thought I was eighteen. So I have full custody of Isaac. So, that’s it. It was hard in the beginning, but it was so worth it.” I said. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know…” Jake said. “Well, know one knew. I’m hungry, baby! I want some pizza!” I yelled. Jacob laughed. “Okay, we can go get something to eat. But babe? You’re going to have to get off my back.” He said. “Humph. Fine. Big old Meany, bitch.” I mumbled. Jake and Jacob both laughed. So we went to the pizza place. I burst into the doors. “Hello, Love of my life! Future husband of my babies! I’m back!” I yelled. I LOVE PIZZA! In both worlds. Wink, wink, wink, wink, wink. “Hey!” said Jacob. I looked at him. “Don’t you come in-between me and my pizza. Cause I will always choose the pizza.” I said evilly. I went at my table and sat down. Jacob flicked me. I glared at him. “Yoouuuu-son-of-a-beach.” I mumbled. They both laughed. Asswholes. Six Since it was only 4:00pm, me, Jake, and Jacob went to see a movie. I dropped off my car at the apartment because I live 30 sec. away from the movie theater. I did not want to go looking for a freaking parking space. To much trouble. So, after Jacob parked his car, we all walked to the movies. I feel funny. Like, someone watching us, kind of funny. I turned around and saw the person that was looking at me. Well, not at me, but at my leg. I looked down. Oh yeah the tattoo. He then looked at me. He looked to be in his late twenties. He had green eyes and brown hair. Wow, his eyes are like the green grass color. He closed his eyes and started to sniff the air. Ewe, now that’s just plain weird. All of a sudden his eyes popped open and he looked at me with big eyes. “Isabel, what are you looking at?” Jacob asked. I looked at him. “Oh, um nothing, its just… your butt is so cute.” I said. I wasn’t lying about that. He had a little bubble butt. Heehee. He turned a little bit pink. Jake was pink too, but that is from trying to not laugh out loud. “Oh, uh well thanks?” Jacob said. DING! There it is. His gangster name! “Jacob, that’s it! Your gangster name! Bubble butt! Yay! Mines paci by the way.” He was about to say something when I turned to Jake. “Jake, your gangster name is…” I studied him for a minute. He had black hair, with grey eyes. He was really buff and was really tall. Cute, too. He had on a black and white striped shirt. “Stripes” I said. He nodded his approval. “Hey! Why does he get stripes and I get bubble butt!” whined Jacob. I looked at him with a loving smile. “Because you have the most beautiful butt I ever seen a guy have. So round and… bubbly.” I said. He just rolled his eyes. “Fine, I’ll stick with bubble butt.” He said. Jake laughed at that. I looked at him evilly. He stopped laughing. I looked back to see if the guy was still there. No he wasn’t there, he was in my face. I jumped back a little. He seems familiar, like he’s been a part of me before, but got lost. “Wow, dude! Why are you all up in my face?” I asked. I turned to look at the guys. “Hey, go on into the movies, I’ll be in there in a minute.” They nodded and left. I turned back to the dude. “I’m sorry I was in your face, you just caught me by surprise, alpha.” Said the dude. “You were surprised? I was the one to turn a-wait what?!? Did you just call me alpha? Like a dog boss?” I asked. He looked a little hurt, but also looked confused. “Yes, I did. I can smell it on you, it’s a stronger smell though. Plus you have the tattoo.” He said pointing at the one of my tattoos poking out of the shorts. I looked back at him then around us. I took his hand and went to sit on the bench were no one was. “Um, so are you saying you’re a doggy?” I asked, a little bit excited. “No, not a doggy, a shape shifter or what humans call it, a werewolf.” He said. Oh man, this is cool. “Dude! You’re a doggy! Awe! Oh, why did you call me alpha? Isn’t that the leader daddy?” I asked. He rolled his eyes. “No, I called you alpha because you are the leader of us. All of us, since you got the tattoo to prove it. But I smell something else in your blood. A LOT of other stuff.” Oh yeah! My other tattoos. “Well, that isn’t the only tattoo I woke up with.” I said. His eyes got big. “Wait what? No, it cant be… how many other tattoos?” he asked. I lifted up my shirt and tank top and showed him the tattoos. “It goes from my belly button, to my knee.” I said. His eyes got super, super huge. I’m kind of scared. “No way! You’re the goddess of all!” he said. I looked at him. “What do you mean?” I asked. “You’re the goddess of all. You have all the tattoos. Even the rare ones. You got the tattoo for the angels, demons, love, mermaids, werewolves, fairies, trolls, and the list goes on.” he said. “OH SHIT! I forgot about the movie!” I yelled and ran inside. Truth is, I did forget about the movie, but I didn’t want to hear anymore of that. I was already kind of shocked. I went into the movies and got my ticket. We were watching some kind of scary movie. I looked around and saw the guys. They were all the way to the top. I went up and sat next to Jacob. He turned to me and smiled. I smiled back. He started to lean in. our lips met in one passionate kiss. Gosh, his lips are soft. Our lips moved slowly. I was about to let Jacob stick his tongue in my mouth, when I heard Jake clear his throat. I looked over at him and gave him my sorry face. Jacob looked mad though. Ha-ha, mad cause he wanted his tongue in my mouth. I looked up to watch the movie, when I saw doggy dude was in here. Oh, no. he was looking around when he spotted me. Then he came and sat next to me. “Hey” he said. “Was sup?” I asked. Someone was poking my shoulder. I turned around to see a very peed off Jacob. Psh, jealous problems much? “Yes?” I asked. He looked at me in disbelief. “Um, who’s he?” he asked in a du voice. “My friend?” I said in my du voice. Oh yeah! What now? You aren’t the only one that can get smart! Then I turned around to a smirking doggy dude. “Doggy dude, what’s your name?” I whispered. “It’s Jeff.” Jesus. Another ‘J’. Lucky me right? “Wassup Jeff!?! I’m Isabel.” I said. Then I got the feeling in my stomach. The feeling when I need something. Something so important that, if you don’t get it for me, I’ll go insane or die. “I NEED MY SKTTLES!” I yelled. Everybody went ‘shh’ to me or said shut up. “DON’T BE RUDE PEOPLE! WHEN A GIRL NEEDS HER SKITTLES, SHE’S GATTA HAVE HER SKITTLES! LETS GO, BUBBLE BUTT, STRIPES, AND DOGGY DUDE!” I yelled. I hopped out of my chair and zoomed out of the movies. I ran to the gas station across from my house. “Ding, Ding, Ding! Your favorite customer is here Mr. Cashier!” I hopped over to the dude that what looked like to be, in his twenties. Gee, why is everybody twenty? Where are all the mean/sweet old peoples at? Anyway, I went to get my skittles. They only have the king size bags, so I grabbed twelve of them. I know, I know, you’re probably like “ONLY KING SIZE” but hey? I usually get three big bags. So what? Hm? Ganna do something bout it? Yeah, I didn’t think so. I went to pay for my stuff. I looked at the guy. He had a lot of acne and had glasses on. Like Jacob! Not the acne part, the glasses part. Other than that he’s cute. But the mean people probably pick on him. Meaners. They need to go die in a whole somewhere in china. Cause I don’t want them here. I looked at the guy and gave him a loving smile. “Well hey there, good looking! I want all these yummy skittles. You guys seriously need to get the big bags in.” I said. He smirked. Well, that’s not a good sign. “Baby, I got big bags for you. Just come in the back and let me show you.” He said in his ‘sexy’ voice. I take everything I said about him in my mind back. I hope Meaners hurt him. I hopped over the counter onto the guy and started to beat him with my fist. He ran out from the counter, me still on him, screaming his head off. The door bells dinged, but I didn’t pay attention to who it was. I was to focused on to teach this harasser a lesson. Hm, maybe I should chop his balls off first. I bit down on him when he pulled my hair. I felt someone lift me off harasser. “LEMME AT EM! I’LL TEACH HARASSER A LESSON!” I yelled. God how I wished Scylla was here. I was pulled out of the station. I looked at Jacob, Jake, and Jeff. They stared at me. Then we all started to crack up. “Oh, man Isabel, you should of seen the look on that guys face! He was screaming like a girl!” Laughed Jake. “Yeah, he was like, AHHH! GET THIS THING OFF ME! OH, GOODNESS HELPS ME PLEASE OH HELP ME!” laughed Jacob in a girly voice. “Ha-ha yeah and when I pulled you off, you didn’t want to stop biting him! You were like a leach!” laughed Jeff. All of a sudden, I stopped laughing and jumped on Jakes back. I started to bite his face and pull his hair. “AHHH! WHAT THE HELL ISABEL!?! GET THE HELL OFF OF ME!” screamed Jake. “NO! I WANT MY SKITTLE AND I WANT THEM NOW!” I was still biting him when I said that, so it sounded more like, “woe I wan my waddles and I wan when wow” so yeah. See? See what happens when a girl doesn’t get her skittles? Dangerous I know. You should see when Scylla doesn’t get her gummy bears. It is TERRIFING. So that’s why I keep a stash of gummy bears in my cabinet. I heard a bell go ding, then it went ding two seconds later. “Baby, I got your skittles. Now come on down slowly.” I looked at him then slowly, started to climb off Jake, but I was still biting him. “Now take your teeth out of him slowly. Then step aside.” I slowly took my teeth out of him then stepped aside. As soon as I stepped aside, Jake ran like a girl where Jeff and Jacob are standing. I pointed to the bag. “The bag… NOW.” I said. He tossed the back and I caught it. I ripped it open with my teeth and ate some skittles slowly. I can see them hold there breath. I smiled real big and skipped over to where they are. I threw my arms around Jacob’s neck and gave him a big kiss. “Thank you baby!” I said happily. He just smiled and put his arms around my waist. “Dude, your girlfriend is bipolar.” Jeff said. Jacob laughed and kissed my head. I yawned and looked at my cell. 8:34. dang, time flies. I looked at Jacob. “I’m tired.” I said. “Well, lets go to your place and take a nap.” I nodded my head. Jake looked peed and Jeff looked like an idiot smiling weird. Eh, he’s a freak. We waved bye and went to my apartment. I unlocked it and we went in. I went to the bedroom and laid on the bed. Jacob came in a minute after and laid down with me. I cuddled up to him. I lifted my head up and looked into his big green eyes. He stared aback at me. He leaned down and kissed me. After a few minutes he asked for entrance. I happily gave it to him. I never felt like this before with anyone. He makes my heart race when I think about him. It tingles when he touches me. He makes me breathless when he smiles. Are kiss got deeper and he was on top of me. A lot of voices were inside of me said ether something like mate or soul mate. He’s the one. He’s mine. He stopped kissing me and just stared at me. He sniffed the air. Then he stopped and got off of me. “What’s wrong?” I asked. “You’re the alpha.” He stated. My eyes got wide. “You’re a puppy, too!” He smiled and nodded. I concentrated. Yes I see now! I can tell that he’s puppy by his scent! Cools! He stared at me with lust in his eyes. “Mate” he said, and then he was on top of me again. We started kissing and it lead to more. Well, I’m not ganna describe how we made love, you pervert! Now let me go to sleep. It’s been a long night. SEVEN It’s been a week since that awesome day. Te-he. Yeah, I got it ON. Aha! You people suck. Anyways, a week passed and Jacob is acting weird. I know he’s keeping something from me. I can since/smell/taste it. For reals. Weird right? I guess my weird powers are kicking in. anyway, he just looks stressed. I need some answers. I need them NOW. I get dressed and drive over to Jake’s. I walk up to his door. Before I could knock, the door opens. “Hey Jake.” I say and walk in. “Well, hi to you, too. Sure, come on in my house.” He says sarcastically. “ZOE!” I yell. I hear to feet slap onto the floor coming towards me. Then it rounds the corners and there she is. “Izy!” yells Zoe. I run up to her and grab her off the floor. “Hey baby girl! How are you? Oh I’ve missed you so much!” I said. She gives me lots of kisses. Oh I forgot Jake hasn’t heard her talk yet. I’m kind of scared to turn around. Let me face my fears! I turn around, oh so slowly. “AHHH!” I yell. His freaking eyes are on the floor! Well, basically they are on the floor. His mouth is on the floor, too. This is a freaky sight! “DID she just talk!?!” he screams. “Dude! Stop screaming! Yes, she did. She talked on the first day she came to the daycare. Now, I need some answers and I need them now.” I said. I walked over to the couch and sat down with Zoe sound asleep next to me. Damn, puppy wolves can be knocked out quick. I look to where Jake was STILL standing. “Jake, get your freaking ass over here NOW!” I yelled. He quickly came. “What’s wrong with Jacob?” I asked. His face immediately fell. He didn’t say anything. Hm, I think I’m gana use my powers. I closed my eyes and concentrated. ‘I wonder if I should tell her that he’s going to the military in two day.’ He thought. What?!? Oh HELL no! Everybody knows how much I’m against dating people in the army. Why, you ask? This world isn’t worth fighting for. My opinion… Actually, it’s not just that. I’m not telling suckers! I stare at Jake wide eyed. I get up and leave. I’m driving but I don’t know where. I end up at the beach. I get out of my car. There are these teens that look seventeen or eighteen playing volleyball and some elderly people, but I don’t care. “AHH!” I scream as loud as I can. I can feel eyes on me, but I don’t care. My knees go out from under me. Why did he not tell me? I deserve to know things like this. I’m his mate. Why is he doing this to me? I start to cry my eyes out as I gaze at the ocean. “Hey, are you okay?” I here a girl ask. I don’t even glance at her. I can tell she’s a wolf along with the other two girls and three guys. There probably still trying to figure out what I am. Little do they no I’m EVERYTHING. Still not looking at them, I speak. “No, my boyfriend is a freaking ass. Keeping his dirty little secret with him. I’m going to rip his balls off and stuff one down his throat and the other one up his ass.” I mumble. I heard a few laughs. I get up off my knees and start walking by the water. I feel like my heart is broken. I don’t need this. I turn around and noticed that the wolves were still following me. “Do you guys need something?” I asked. They were looking at my leg. The guy with blue eyes and brown hair looked at me. “You’re the goddess of all.” He said. Hm, really now? “Yes, I am. That isn’t a problem, right?” I asked. He shook his head no. “So, what’s your guys name and age?” I asked. The girl with blond hair and blue eyes looked at me. “My names Angela. I am twenty-one, and this is Braden~” she pointed at the guy with black hair and blue eye. Let me tell you, all of them have blue eyes. “~and this is Chris~” she pointed at the guy with red hair. “~and this is Mark, the grey hair guy, and this is Abby and Janice.” She said. They all waved at me. I waved back. “Hey, my names Isabel, but you can call me Izy.” I said. I heard a car pull up and I looked to see Jacob got out of his jeep. Man, I wish he did not mark me. He walked up to me and tried to kiss me but nope. Not letting that happen now are we? He had a confused look on his face. I just shook my head. Chris hopped over to me and put his arm around me. “Is this guy the guy you threatened to rip his balls off and stick em down his throat and ass?” He asked. I started laughing. Jacob looked mad. Not cause the balls thing but the Chris’s arm around me thing. “Guys, I need to talk to my boyfriend.” I said. They nodded there head and walked away. I turned to Jacob. “Why?” I asked. Jacob didn’t say anything for a while. “What do you mean ‘Why?’?” he asked. “You are hiding something. Tell me it. NOW.” I said. I already knew what it was, but he didn’t know I knew. He froze. “Um, yeah I am and I was going to tell you but I didn’t know how and stuff. Ok here it goes. Isabel, I, I, I signed up in the army a while ago because I thought I could help with my strength and stuff. Um, and then I met you. I’m not changing my mind though, because I always wanted to be in the army, since my dad went and stuff. But I love you so much and I don’t want us to be over because of this. I love you, Isabel. I want us be together forever.” He said. I just stood there for a while looking at the ocean. Then I lifted my head up and looked at Jacob. “But what if they come?” I asked. “Who?” he asked. I felt tears in my eyes. “The men in black.” I cried. That is the reason I’m so against this. Because they come. I don’t want them to come. Jacob hugged me tightly. “Baby girl, you got to have faith. Don’t be scared of them. I’m a wolf. I can do this.” He said. I cried into his shoulder while he rubbed my hair. This sucks ass. eight IT’S THE DAY! The day my mate leaves me. I wanted it to be a dream, but my powers can’t go that far. I could change his mind with them though. He wouldn’t want it though. So I went against that. I was helping Jacob get the rest of his stuff out of the truck. I turned around with his bag in my hand, and found him on his knee. What. The. Hell. We only have been together for fourteen day! We ARE mates. And I DO love him. I started crying. “Isabel Grace Sanchez, I love you so much. I don’t want to lose you and I want to make you my wife when I come back. I promise every night, before I got to sleep, I will think of you, us, and how much I love you. Will you marry me, Isabel?” he asked. I smiled real big. “NO!” I yelled. He froze. I started laughing. “Of course I’ll marry you, Jacob.” I said. He smiled real big and grabbed me. I gave him one big soft kiss. I heard a car rumble and turned my head. I saw Steve and Isaac. “ISAAC!” I scream. I hear Jacob chuckle. I run to the truck and grab Isaac. “Mommy!” Isaac yells. I kiss him every where. I don’t care if he calls me mommy. He’s my child. I raised him. I claimed him. He’s MINE. I may not have popped him out of my vagina, but so what. I snuggle up to Isaac. “Oh baby I missed you so much!” I said. I looked back to Jacob. He had a huge smile on his face. “Did you make them bring him back early?” I asked. He nodded. I went over to him and kissed him. I tried to pull away but something of mine was stuck on Jacob. Oh, wait. Never mind, it’s Isaac. I gave Isaac to Jacob. “Hey there buddy.” Jacob said. “Hi daddy!” Isaac said. I froze. What is Jacob’s reaction? I looked at Jacob. He was looking at Isaac. All of a sudden he smiled real big. “Yeah, that’s right bubby. I’m your daddy. I love you Isaac, so much. I’m going to make it final that you’re my son when I get back.” He said. I had tears in my eyes. I went over to them and gave them both kisses. I’m the freaking luckiest girl a freaking live! After are little family moment, we got Jacob stuff and went to the plane thingy. Yeah, don’t judge ma! I’m not stupid, it’s just I… forget easily? Yeah, that’s it. I forget easily. Oh, gosh, I hate goodbyes. I rap my arms around Jacob. “Why must you leave me?” I cried. “Babe, stop crying. Your colorful tears are ruining my uniform! I’m not leaving you, beautiful. We are always together. I promise I will be back.” He said. I looked up at him. “Don’t break your promise to me.” I said. He nodded his head. He bent his head and kissed me. Soft and sweet. He broke the kiss and put his forehead on mine. Then, he let me go and picked Isaac up. “Baby boy, I have to go now. Be a good boy for your mommy.” He said. “Okay, daddy. I love you.” He said. Jacob kissed him on the cheek. “I love you too, Isaac.” He said. He gave me Isaac and gave us each a kiss on the cheek and left. I broke down crying. I felt someone rub my back and I looked back. Scylla was there with tears in her eyes. “STOP CRYING, ISABEL! HE’S COMING BACK! AND WHEN YOU CRY, I CRY! AND BITCH, IT’S RUINING MY MAKE-UP!” she cried. I laughed and sniffled. I grabbed her hand and put Isaac on my hip. We walked out the airport and left. We went to the park. And guess who we saw? Jake AND ass-face making out. Mhm. What a nice cousin he is, seeing his cousin off to the army. NOT. I walked up to Jake with Scylla behind me. They still didn’t notice me. “THIS IS A PARK FOR KIDS! NOT FOR UGLY ASS PEOPLE MAKING OUT!” Scylla yelled. They stopped kissing and looked at us. “Why didn’t you see Jacob off?” I asked. Jake froze. “That was today? Oh shit!” he said. Ass-face just smirked. “What the hell are you smirking at? What’s wrong with your face? You looked like you switched it with your ass.” Scylla said. Yeep, she’s like my twin. Isaac looked at her and got angry. Well he remembered her. “Look, Izy mom! It’s the bitch!” he yelled. I froze. I turned to look at Scylla’s face. It was red. Like Chris’s hair. I quickly explained. “Sky, he called her that when she slapped me. And then she slapped Isaac. But I got her good as you can see.” I said, pointing at ass-face. She had two black eyes and a broken nose. Scylla went into her face. Uh-oh. “YOU SLAPPED A FUCKEN THREE YEAR OLD IN THE FACE!” She yelled. Ass-face smirked. “Yes, and it felt good.” Then she went still. I think it was because Jake. I looked at him. Yep, he was pissed. Before ass-face could turn around, Scylla hopped on her. “WHAT WAS THAT, BITCH?!? DON’T YOU EVER COME NEAR MY FAMILY AGAIN! THESE ARE MY PEOPLE! DON’T MESS WITH MY PEOPLE!” Scylla screamed. I just watched her beat ass-face in. Batman. That’s Scylla’s gangster name. I turned back to Jake. “How did you forget something as important as that?” I asked. He wasn’t paying attention to me. He was looking at my hand. At my ring. “Yeah, he purposed and I said yes. You would of knew if you were THERE.” I said. I heard a BAM and turned around. Scylla had ass-face in a head lock on the ground. “Scylla, come on babe, I feel like I’m going to throw up.” I said. It’s true. I felt sick. She snapped out of her batman mode and walked to where I was. “Are you ok?” she asked worried. I smiled weakly at her. “I’m fine. Just a little sick. Oh, and by the way. Wipe all that blood off you before you step one foot in my car.” I said walking off to the car. Why me? NINE It’s been two weeks since the park incident. I feel like I’m being watched all the time. Plus, being sick doesn’t make it all that better. I also got noodle to take care of. I’ve gained like 10 pounds. Wait. I just now started to think of this. Jacob used protection… right? Oh, shit. I walk into my bedroom. If he did, he would have thrown it away in the little trashcan in my bedroom. I never really got the chance to clean it out. I walk to my little yellow trashcan and looked inside it. Nope. No condom. Well, off to the gas station it is. I walked into Isaac’s room. “Hey, Scylla. I’m going to go to the gas station to get a pregnancy test.” I said. She looked up from her toys. “Okay, let me know if you’re pregnant.” She said. Then, she looked down and started playing with Isaac again. I walk out the door and walked across the street. The bells jingled. The cashier I attacked looked up. He looked a little pale. I shrugged then walked up to the tests. I picked up one of the cheap ones, then ten of the good ones up. I got the cheap one because, if I was pregnant, I want to keep the stick of my first pregnancy with me. The newer ones fade off. I walk to the cashier. He looked at me scared. “I’m not going to do anything to you, I just need these.” I said. He looked at the pregnancy tests. He smelled weird. Like a smell that smelt good, but familiar. I looked at him. His acne is cleared up and he doesn’t have glasses on. He changed. Very, very, fast. “What are you?” I asked. He stopped ringing up the tests. He looked at me. “How do you… you’re a vampire, too. I can since it. My names Zane. I’m the prince of the vampires.” He said. Cool! He lifted up his arm and showed me a tattoo. It looked really similar to mine. “Hey! That kind of looks like mine!” I said. I lifted up my shirt to show him. His eyes got wide. “You’re the goddess of all!” he yelled. Few, am I glad know one is around us. I nodded my head. “Do you have a bathroom?” I asked. He nodded and pointed at the door. I smiled then dashed to the door. I started puking. After that was over I peed on all the sticks and sat them down. After three minutes I looked at them. They all had a positive sign on them. Sigh. I have some work cut out for me. I threw the good sticks away and kept the cheap one. I walked out of the restroom. “So are you pregnant?” asked Zane. I looked at him and nodded. Then I started to cry. I’m going to have to wait for my fiancé to get back before I get help. No, Scylla would help me. Zane came over and patted my back. I sniffled and looked up. “How long does it take for a wolf baby to come out of my vagina?” I asked. Zane laughed and gave me a hug. “You’re lucky. It only takes five months for a wolf baby to come.” He said. “Are vampires and wolfs enemies?” I asked. He looked down and nodded his head yes. “We need to change that. I have visions. I can see us change the world. All of us will get along sooner or later. When I say all, I mean ALL creatures.” I said. He looked up and nodded. “I know some people are going to try and kill me, but I have to try. Well, I gatta get back. Bye, Zane.” I said. I turned around then stopped. I looked back at him. “Why do you work in a gas station?” I asked. “My dad made me.” he said and shrugged. I smirked and left. I got back to the apartment and went to my computer straight away. I opened my yahoo account up and sent Jacob an email. It was just a simple ‘Babe, I’m pregnant’ email. I already know the sex. It’s a girl. I know. I have awesome powers. I walk into Isaac’s room. Scylla and Isaac looked up. “I’m pregnant. Hey, Isaac! You’re going to have a sister!” I said. Scylla jumped up and hugged me. Isaac was jumping everywhere like a mad man. “Scylla lets go to the mall.” I Said. She nodded like crazy and got Isaac to get him ready. I went into my room to get ready myself. I quit my job at the daycare a few days ago. I don’t really need it. When my parents died, they had a lot of money in the bank. Plus the insurance. I had over five billion dollars in the bank. I have know clue how they got that money. Not one idea. I went to my dresser and got short shorts and a blue tank top. Gee, you can already see the bump! I got dressed but felt uncomfortable. So I put some basketball shorts on. Oh yeah, I feel good. I went out and got the keys and my credit card. “Come on Scylla and Isaac!” I yelled. They came running out of the room. We got to the mall and I hopped out of the car. I felt my phone vibrate. I opened it up and looked at the message. It was an email from Jacob. Tears came to my eyes as I read it. ‘Hey beautiful. Give Isaac a kiss for me. I got your email. I’m so happy. I think it’s a girl ;) I miss you guys so much. I can’t wait to see your faces. I love you, baby. I have to go now. Xoxo-Jacob.’ Oh gosh, I miss him. I put my phone in my pocket and got Isaac out of the car. We went to the baby store first. I picked out some cute little dresses and Scylla went crazy as hell on baby clothes. “ISABEL! I NEED TO GET YOU THESE ONES FOR THE BABY! SHE’S GOING TO LOOK FUCKING CUTE IN IT! AWW I LOVE THIS BABY ALREADY! OH I LOVE YOU GUYS!” she yelled and hugged me and Isaac. “Can’t. Breath.” I said. She let go and gave me her sorry face. I told Scylla everything if you were thinking that. She knows everything that’s going on with me. Me being goddess of everything and all. Scylla drags me to this shop with baby shirts that say stuff like ‘fuck off’ and stuff. Who in the hell would put that on there baby? That is just wrong. That word is just wrong. I felt like I was going to puke so I gave Scylla Isaac and ran to the nearest trashcan. After I get done puking my guts out, I get my toothbrush out and go to the restroom. These come in handy for times like this. After I get done brushing my teeth, I feel hungry. I hop over to the stupid store we were at and got Scylla and Isaac. “I’M FREAKING HUNGRY!” I yelled. We went to the food court. I acted like I was flying. Then I bumped into a hard chest. I looked up to a very amused Jake. I looked at each of my arms then put them back over to my side. “Yooouuu-son-of-a-beach. You just made my plain crash.” I mumbled. I walked away and looked around. “Scylla! I want a chocolate frosty with fries and a cheese burger without onions. I also want pizza with some skittles and a chocolate bar. I want lemonade with all that too. Then, get Isaac some chicken nuggets. You get whatever.” I said. She nodded her head and went off to get the order. I took Isaac and went to sit in an open table. I sat down and looked down at my belly. Gee, I already have a baby bump. I looked at Isaac sitting next to me. “Isaac, you know you’re going to have a little sister soon.” I said. Isaac looked up at me and frowned. “No! I wanna broder!” he yelled. I smirked at him. “Well, too bad!” I said happily. He pouted some more then got distracted by his awesome toy car. I heard someone clear there throat, but I already knew who it was. The big bad Jake. I looked up after three minutes of his freaking throat clearing. “What?!?” I asked/yelled. He looked a little shocked. “Gee, what got stuck up your vajayjay?” He asked. I stood up and pointed at my belly. “This.” I said and sat back down. Now he was even more shocked. He looked up at me angrily. “Y-you’re pregnant!” he yelled. I nodded my head slowly. “I didn’t know that till you pointed it out.” I said slowly. His eyes were filled with anger. “Why are you so mad, huh? You should be happy for your cousin and me.” I said. “I liked you before he did!” he yelled. I looked up. I knew he liked me, but I can’t help this. “I can’t help who my mate is. Werewolf’s only getting one mate, so if I rejected him, he’d be lonely for life. Plus, I wouldn’t throw away someone I love back, away. Sure, I had a little crush on you, but I got over it when I met Nancy. Just go back to her. You might like me, but you also got a mate out there. Don’t throw away your chances for someone that’s not your mate. Sure, it’s rare. But don’t give up. Now, Scylla’s coming back with some yummy stuff I’ve been wanting for a long time. Leave us!” I said. Scylla had three bags of food and set them on the table. She looked up at Jake and gave him her dirtiest look. “Where’s your girlfriend? Slapping babies around?” She asked. He gave her a dirty look and left. Scylla shrugged her shoulders and started digging in the bag. “Here are your chicken nuggets, Isaac-boo.” She said and gave him his food and drink. She looked up at me. “Here is your frosty with fries and a cheese burger without onions and pizza with some skittles and a peanut bar and lemonade with all that too. I didn’t get you a chocolate frosty or bar because dogs can’t have chocolate.” She said, nodding her head to herself. I wanted to punch her. I looked at my stuff and started to create my master piece. I open my cheese burger and put fries on top of it and added my peanut bar, skittles, and pizza along with the fries on top of my cheese burger. I lifted it up to my mouth and started eating it. Mmm, yum, delicious. I looked up to see Scylla and Isaac look at me in disgust. Aye, what I do? TEN! I woke up to a loud bump. Welp, they’re here. I had a vision last night that two troll guys where going to break in my house and kill me and Isaac. I was pissed at that. So Isaac is at Scylla’s and I’m here ready to beat some asses. Trolls are not ugly. They are very gorgeous. Well, the men. The women have some problems. I think you can be beautiful if you act the way. You can also be ugly. Like ass-face. Teehee. Anyways, I go out of bed and walked into the living room where they were. They where turned around and I made my smell be gone. So they think I’m gone. I looked at them. Wow, they were tall. They were speaking some kind of language. I can… understand it. That’s freaking awesome. I cleared my throat to let them know I was here. They turned around. I raised my eyebrow. “Do you guys want some coffee? It’s six am and I need to try and wake up.” I walked into the kitchen leaving them shocked. I put the coffee on and took three cups out of the cabinet. I turned around and looked at them. They were still a little shocked. I walked up to them and took both of there hands. They had really ruff hands. I bet they loved the feeling of my soft ones. I dragged them into the kitchen and made them sit down. I put the coffee in front of them. I sat down in my seat and tried to bring my feet to my belly, but the huge bump made me stop in my tracks. Yeah, my bump is huge. I’m five weeks pregnant. Zane was wrong. Because I’m the goddess of all, I have babies faster. I looked at the huge trolls with sad eyes. “Why are you trying to kill me?” I asked. They got out of there shock and stared at me. The blue one looked at me. “I don’t want you to take my thrown. So I have no choice.” He said with power in his voice. I looked at the tattoo on his arm. Oh… I looked at him and shook my head. “I’m not going to take your thrown. I know what the scrolls say, but I don’t care. You are going to be the leader of the trolls. I know you are a good one. I’m created to bring us all together. To be happy. For love to bloom.” I looked down at my belly and rubbed it. She was kicking really hard. I started to sing. It makes her calm. I started to sing she’s a butterfly by Martina Mcbride. She automatically calmed down. I looked up at the trolls. “To protect what we love. What we have. I am not taking your throne.” I said. They looked at each other and started to speak there language. I rolled my eyes and just listened to them. “What should we do my lord?” Asked the red one. The ‘lord’ looked at me, then at my belly and smiled a little. Oh, so it smiles. Shocking. He then looked at me. “Nothing.” He said in his language. I sighed. “Good” I said in there language. They looked at each other and smiled. I looked at the lord. “Can you buy me some chips?” I asked. The lord laughed and nodded his head to the red troll and told him to go buy me some potato chips. The red troll left to get me some chips. Oh, yeah humans can’t see what they really look like. Only me and other creatures. The lord dude looked at me then at the coffee on the table. He lifted up his big hand and took the coffee and drank some of it. Cool, trolls like coffee. All of a sudden he stopped drinking it and spit it everywhere. Or maybe they don’t. “What is this delicious drink!?” The lord dude asked. My mouth dropped open. “What in the hizales is your problem?!” I yelled. Lord dude looked at me and blinked twice. “Nothing, why?” he asked. I was about to yell at him tell I smelt some yummy chips. I looked over to the red troll that was standing by the door way. I got on my feet and sighed slowly then… attack! I jump on troll dude and rip the bag from him and got off him. Oh yeah. How do you like them plums?! I walked over to the cabinet and got a bowl out for the chips. I ripped the bag open with my teeth and put the chips in the bowl. Taking the bowl, I went to the fridge and got the jar of caramel out. I went to my spot at the table and sat down. “Red dude! Get the pickles outta the fridge!” I yelled. Red dude looked at me, then got up and got the pickles out of the fridge. He came back to his spot at the table and sat down. “By the way, my name isn’t red, it’s Sed.” He said. I took the pickles from his large hand. “Thanks red Sed.” I said. He rolled his eyes. I took my pickles and poured the caramel in it. Then I opened my jar of pickles and took out a pickle. I looked at the trolls. “Want some?” I asked. They smiled and said sure. The dipped there pickles in my special dip. They smiled as they chewed. Oh, I know its good. Eleven *two month later* I woke up with wetness under me. Oh shit. I looked at Scylla, who was sleeping at the end of my bed. Her head was hanging off the bed. I kicked her. “SCYLLA, WAKE UP! SHE’S COMING!” I yelled. Scylla did a double flip off of the bed then rolled into the wall. “Damn, you havta be so freaking loud… THE BABY IS COMING!?” she screamed. My bedroom door opened and in came Isaac with his toy baseball bat. “I get em! I get em!” he said running in circles. I got off the bed and went into my closet and got my suit case. I gave Scylla my car keys. She picked up Isaac and got my suit case. I put my slippers on and went out to the car. Scylla put my suit case in the trunk and Isaac in his seat. She got into the car and put her seat belt on. We are now headed to the hospital. So, I’m guessing you want to know what happen these past two months. I found out that I’m having a girl. My cravings got worse. I craved a candle that smelt like flowers. Stupid Scylla took it away from me before I could taste it. Nobody has been trying to kill me. I know a lot more about my powers now. It is awesome. Jake won’t talk to me. He hasn’t at all. Too bad I quit my job at the daycare. Now I can’t see awesome little Zoe. Jacob is supposed to be back in seven more months. I miss him so freakers much! By the way, my baby shower was the bomb digidy. Last but not least, I got a new home. It’s a six bedded house. Really pretty one, too. Back to reality. “GET THIS BABY OUT OF MY JAY-JAY!” I screamed at the doctors. We been here for almost seven hours and I’m ready to kill. The nurses were going around getting ready for the baby to come. Isaac is outside in the waiting room with Jeff, Chris, Angela, Abby, Janice, Braden, Mark, and Zane. So he’s safe with a bunch of dogs and a vamp. Scylla is in here with me. One nurse came in with a bucket and put it under me. I was confused. “Why in the hell are you putting a bucket under me?” I asked. The nurse looked at me. “We are not allowed to deliver the baby. So if the doctor does not come in time, the baby will go into the bucket.” This bitch just messed with the wrong mamma. “OH HELL NO HOE!” I yelled. Scylla looked like she was ready to burst. “I AM NOT GOING TO JUST SIT HERE AND LET MY BABY NIECE FALL INTO A BUCKET! I’LL DELIVER HER IF A FUCKKIN DOCTOR DOESN’T COME! Ignorant ass people.” Scylla said. The doctor finally came in after me and Scylla harassed all the nurses. The doctor told me to push like fifty times. “I’M FUCKING PUSHING, ASS! STOP TELLING ME TO PUSH! JACOB, I’M GOING TO KILL YOUR ASS WHEN YOU GET BACK! YOU DID THIS TO ME! AHHHH!” I screamed. I pushed my last push and the baby came out. I couldn’t cry because of my tears are colorful. Stupid ass tears. Scylla got to cut the cord. The doctor came over with my beautiful baby girl. She opened her eyes and smiled at me. She had her daddy’s eyes and nose and hair color and… everything. Not one thing on me. I smelt her scent in. She’s just a puppy. I’m glad of that though. “I love you, Olivia Jane Scaller.” I said. I started to get a little teary eyed. Scylla wiped my tears before anyone could see them. I was getting tired but I didn’t want to go to sleep yet. Scylla took the baby from me and told me to get some rest. I nodded my head and dozed off. “Hey mommy, it’s time to feed your baby girl.” I heard Scylla say. I yawned and rubbed my eyes. I looked around and touched my tummy. It’s weird not having a bump. A big one at that. Scylla gave me Olivia. I pulled down my shirt and put Olivia near my boob so she could eat. Scylla went to go get something to eat for herself. After Olivia was done eating, I got to have my visitors to come in my room. Everyone came into my room. “Hey” they all said. I smiled. “Hey” I replied. They all came over by me and looked at the baby and gave me lots of compliments. I saw Isaac looking at her. “She so squishy and cute.” He said. I smiled and gave him a kiss. I took a picture of her and sent it to Jacobs email. Then I took one of Isaac and did the same thing. I smiled. I love my life. TWELVE It’s been a month since I had my Olivia. Life has been going pretty crazy. I’m strong. So I always get through it. Jacob emailed me yesterday and told me he loved and missed his family. I can’t wait for him to come home. I walked into Olivia’s room. Well, I’ll describe her room for you. It’s so cute! Her room colors were black, red, and white. Her room theme is zebra print. I got everything I need in her closet. I walked up to her little bed to get her when all of a sudden I got this terrible pain all over my body. I couldn’t do anything. Not even scream. It felt like I got stabbed a thousand times. Then it just stopped. I got off the floor and looked around. What the hell? I think it might have been a vision coming on or something. I hope it doesn’t come back. It hurt like hell. I got Olivia from her baby bed and went downstairs. Isaac was playing with Scylla and Chris. I went into the living room and sat down. I gazed at the Christmas tree. Yes, it’s almost Christmas. Isaac doesn’t care about Santa that much. He wakes up in the morning and says “It’s Jesus’ birthday!” he always makes me get a birthday balloon. I don’t mind it. It’s Jesus’ birthday after all. Not Santa’s. I look down at Olivia. She is sucking on her paci and looking at the tree. She then looks at me and smiles and starts making baby noises. I smile at her. She looks like her daddy so much. She snuggles deep in my arm and falls asleep. Isaac, Scylla, and Chris all came into the living room. Isaac comes up to me and looks at the baby. Then he looks at me. “Mommy, Livy is sleeping. Can I kiss my baby?” He asks. I smile at him and nod. He got on his toes and kissed her forehead. Isaac adores Olivia. He always wants to sleep in the same room and bed. I don’t know why, but I feel sad. I look at Scylla. “Scylla, take Olivia, okay?” I asked. She nodded her head and took the baby. Isaac, Chris, and Scylla look at me with concern. I go outside and look at the garden. I feel like I want to cry, but I don’t know why. Maybe I’m getting depressed about Jacob being gone. I walked around the garden and reached the pool. My pool is freaking awesome. It’s shaped like a bean and has a small waterfall. I feel someone tap my shoulder. I turn around to see Chris. “Hey, wassup?” I asked. “What’s wrong with you today?” He asked. I lost my smile. “I don’t know. I just feel sad. I don’t even know why.” I said. He looked at me with worried eyes. I smiled. “It’s okay. I’ll be fine.” I said. He nodded his head and went back inside. Sigh. I started to sing a song. It’s called ‘Santa bring my soldier home’ by the stunners. I went into the kitchen and started dinner. Isaac wanted some pizza, so I’m making home made pizza. I learned the recipe from mom. I missed them so much. I remember my first word… (Flash back) I looked at the tall man with raven colored hair and high cheek bones. I smile real big at him. He looked down at me with warmth in his eyes and smile. He sat down next to me on the peach colored sofa. “Hey there, belly button, daddy’s home.” He said. I smiled another smile at him. He smiled and grabbed me. He snuggled me up to him and kissed my forehead. The front door opened and a woman stepped in. She was tall and had brown hair with tan skin. She looked at us on the couch and smiled, her blue eyes sparkling. “Hey there.” She said. She walked over to us and kissed my daddy and kissed me on the cheek. She sat down next to daddy. She stretched her foot and hit it on the table. She got a scowl on her face. “Owe! Oh, shit!” she yelled. I looked at her and I looked at daddy and put the same scowl on my face as mommy. “Shit!” I yelled. Daddy looked at me in surprise. He then grew a goofy smile on his face. He looked at mom. “Hey sweetie! She said her first word!” he said in excitement. My mother looked at me. “Well, finally. I was getting kind of worried. Since she’s one years old and all.” She smiled and went to get something. It was a pink book. “Now baby girl. This is your baby book! Now let’s see. Your first word is shit at age one year, 2 months, 4 days, 23 min, and 2 seconds years old.” She said in excitement. I smiled real big. “Shit!” I yelled. “Shit!” They yelled together, happily. (Back to reality) It was 10pm and Isaac was still up. Olivia was already fast asleep. I walk downstairs and go into the living room where Isaac, Scylla, Chris, and Zane. What in the hizales is Zane doing here? Uh, I don’t care anymore. I walk were Isaac was very slowly. He can always tell when his bed time is. As I get near, Chris’s eyes flash up to where I was. See, that’s where the mistake was. Isaac automatically jumped on Chris. He looked at me and hissed. Yep, he is a little weirdo. I get into a stance ready to attack Isaac at anytime he makes a move. Chris looked at Isaac and was about to grab him. It was too late. He made his move. Missed. Isaac jumped off of Chris and ran towards the back door. I automatically ran to him and hopped on him. He tried to escape but failed. I took his feet and lifted him up. He was hanging upside down. He looked at me and pouted. “No! I don’t wanna go to bed!” he yelled at me. I smirked at him. “Well, I don’t want to step on toys twenty-four seven, but I’m not complaining.” I said. He squinted his eyes. “Touché.” He said. I smile and set him down. He automatically went to bed. I went into the living room and sat on Chris’s lap. He looks up at me and smirks. I gave him my evil eye. I look up at Zane. He was reading a book. I cringed at that. I don’t get along with books. So don’t try and put me in a room with them alone. I will go insane. Zane looked up at me, finally noticing me staring at him. “Wacha reading?” I asked. “Oh um, nothing really.” He said. “Really now? It looks like something to me, bro.” I left my brow up. Before he could open his mouth, I hopped on top of him. I guess he saw my move, because I was underneath him now. I sighed. I squinted my eyes. “Yoooouuu-son-of-a-bitch.” I mumbled. He smirked at me. I felt a hand by my knee. Oh shit. I looked at him wide eyed. I started laughing real loud. “No! STOP! That’s my ticklish spot you ass!” I laughed out. He was smiling evilly. “I know.” He said and continued to tickle me. I was kicking my feet, so I guess I kicked his baby makers. I heard an ‘oaf’. I looked down. Yep, I did. I got up and dust my self off. I turned to Chris and Scylla. I squinted my eyes at them. “Traitors” I mumbled. I stomped upstairs. I went into my room and got changed into a tank top and short shorts. Then I hopped on my bed and rolled into a ball. I started to cry. What is wrong with me? thirteen I woke up to a foot in my face. I looked down to see Scylla sprawled out. Of course her head was hanging off the bed. Why does she not sleep in her room? Yes, Scylla lives with me. I got off the bed and got some clothes to take a shower with. Today I’m wearing a turquoise turtle neck that goes down to my butt, and a pair of black tights. I go to check on Isaac and Olivia, and then hopped onto the shower. I took a fifteen minute shower then got out. I started putting on my clothes. After I was done, I looked into the mirror. Holy moldy! My hairs back to its pitch black self! Yay! I look at my eyes. They were still the same. I looked at my eye shadows. I decided on a gold looking color and black eyeliner with lip gloss. I went into Isaac’s room and looked at him. I looked at the big ball next to him. I smelt the sent. Chris stayed over. I smelt again. And Zane. I went downstairs and went into the kitchen. I think I’m ganna make my famous French toast. I went into the fridge and got out the eggs and butter. I went into the cabinet and got out the sugar, cinnamon, powdered sugar, and bread. I got a frying pan and started to make my awesome meal. After I was done, I went to wake up Scylla. She was up and on her cell phone. I stopped and listen. Yes, call me nosey, I don’t give a shit. “Yeah, I know… so when are you coming to visit me?” since I have awesome hearing, I could hear the other person on the phone. “I don’t know really, but it’s going to be soon. Okay baby?” the dude said. “Yeah ok. Hurry up and get here!” Scylla said. “Hahaha, alright gee calm down, bro. Well, I got to go. I love you boo-thang.” He said. “Okay. I love you too, boo-bay.” Scylla said. She hung up the phone and turned around. She jumped a little. “Gee Isabel! Trynna gimme a heart attack!” she yelled. Oh no. you are NOT getting out of this one, hoe. “Who was that?” I asked. She started to shuffle her feet. “My mom.” She said. I got out my cell phone and called her mom. I know she lied, but I just want to embarrass her for lying to me. Carrel answered on the first ring. “Hey there Isabel how is Indiana?” she asked. I smiled. “Cold and ugly. How is California, Carrel?” I said while eyeing Scylla. Her eyes went wide. “Oh, it’s lovely dear. Did you need something dear?” She asked. “When was the last time you spoke to Scylla?” I asked. “Oh, it was Monday, the seventeenth so… I’d say a week ago.” She said. I smiled. “Okay. Bye, I love you, boo-bay.” I said smiling. She laughed. “I’m guessing you caught Scylla lying to you about a call? Hahaha, I love you too, boo-thang.” She said and hanged up. I looked up at Scylla. “Why did you lie to me?” I asked. She looked scared. “I couldn’t tell know one about my relationship with Conner. I’m sorry.” She said and put her head down. I sighed. “You know you can tell me everything. I forgive you. This once though. Don’t you ever lie to me again. I will fuck you up the next time you lie to me. Come on it’s time to eat.” I turned around and went to the guest room. Zane was there asleep. I jumped on him. His eyes popped open. He looked at me. “IT’S TIME TO EAT, BROSKY! KNOW GETCHO LAZY ASS UP, BOYEE!” I yelled. I jumped off Zane and ran to Isaac’s room. “Wake up, people! Breakfast is done!” I then ran to Olivia’s room. She was awake and cooing. I got her and went to the kitchen. I got the bottle out off the counter and popped it into her mouth. Someone rang the door bell. Scylla took Olivia. I went and walked to the door. I opened it and there were two guys in black uniforms at my doorway. I looked at the guys. I looked at the black SUV. Then I looked at the guys that had a look of pity on there face. I looked at the one with a letter in his hand. I looked at them. “He… He’s gone, isn’t he?” I asked with tears streaming down my face. I don’t care if they see my tears. There wolfs anyway. The guy with brown eyes nodded his head. I fell to my knees and screamed. I did everything. I screamed. I cried. I yelled. But they were still here. The men in black. I heard footsteps behind me. I felt someone wrap there arms around me. I looked up to see Chris with a look of pity on his face. I cried harder. “No! He-he promised me! We where s-s-suppose to get married and be h-happy! Why me! WHY!?!” I screamed and cried and yelled. I couldn’t do anything but this. I cried myself to sleep. (5 days later) I was here. This place with a bunch of people in army suites. I had Olivia and Isaac close to me. I was sitting here with my kids looking at there fathers big picture. Jacob’s parents went up to his casket. His mother laying a hand on his grave crying. Jake went next. His eyes were red and splotchy. He left. I was the last one to go up. I took in a big breath. I looked down at Isaac. He looked up at me with tears in his eyes. I took his hand and went up. I looked down. His flag was there. Scylla took Olivia from my hands. I slowly put my hand on his casket. I started to cry. “I love you baby. I am going to miss you.” I started to cry worse. “So much. I am going to miss you so much. Jacob Steven Scaller, I love you and always will.” I took the flag from his grave. I looked down one more time, then turned around. It was time to change the world. Text: dont still my crab peoples!! :) All rights reserved. Publication Date: July 29th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-jojo14
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-ashley-baker-ever-lasting-love/
Ashley Baker Ever Lasting Love Love with a twist Publication Date: June 26th 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-bakerwoman1996
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-jane-and-sarah-breathless/
Jane and Sarah Breathless To my Best friend who helped me write this book as much as I did. CHAPTER 1 I gazed at him fondly as he rubbed my cheek. I was about an inch apart from him as he leaned in to kiss me. Our lips touched and warmth passed through us. I did not know that that would be our last kiss. We pulled away slightly. I caressed his cheek and he ran his fingers through my golden brown hair. I looked into Jacob’s deep blue eyes and found a yearning. “I want to take you somewhere special” he said, “I want to drive you to the only place that makes me happy besides your embrace.” He slipped his hand into mine, and raced to his car. We traveled for ten minutes, and then we turned onto Highway 13. It was a long bridge that was high above a shallow river. We traveled on the highway for a while. As we were about to turn off the highway onto another empty street, a car swerved into us. Luckily, Jacob with his lightning fast reflexes, swerved out of the way. Not so luckily, he hit the side of the bridge. Jacob, having never locked the door in his excitement, flew out the car door, off the bride, and into the river. I stared, then screamed, then started to sob. That could not have happened, it just couldn’t have! That should’ve been a dream, I should’ve woken up in the car snuggled up against Jacob. My tears flowed as I thought about Jacob- his beautiful deep eyes, his lightly tanned skin, his shaggy brown hair, the way he smiled at me, and only me. I burst out in sobs again, louder than before. I sprinted out of the car, down the highway, down the steep slope that led to the river, and into the river. I got scratched and bruised, and soaked, but all I cared about was seeing Jacob. As I splashed through the river, I realized that Jacob was not alive. He could not be. My face was wet, I was not sure if it was from the water of the river, or from my tears. I saw Jacob’s limp body. He was floating on the surface of the foot deep water. I hugged his lifeless body, and kissed his cold lips. I ran my fingers through his wet hair, and rubbed my thumb on his cheek. I saw police sirens, but I did not listen. I heard people yelling but I did not care. A single tear drop fell onto Jacob’s cheek. I felt a hand on my shoulder and turned to see who’s it belonged to. A man with a thick mustache told me to go home, but I refused to leave Jacob- my Jacob. The police had to drag me away from him while I scratched and yelled at them. Two years later I still have not forgotten what Jacob looked like as he was falling, nor have I recovered. Chapter 2 It has been a few years now and i have still not have given up on Jacob. However, I do have a new boyfriend. He is not nearly as nice as Jacob, but he eases the pain a little. His name is Jesse. He is pretty strong and muscular but not as beautiful as Jacob. Most nights we snuggle up by the fire in his new house in Vermont, but every time i am with him, i think of Jacob. One night, I had a dream. When i woke up, i knew what i had to do to be with Jacob, but i didn't know how to do it. As the days pass my body, nothing passes my mind except for how to be with Jacob. I lie awake all night tossing and turning. My plan is to risky, i don't think i can come through with it. But, I have to wait until the time is right... Yesterday, Jesse and I went to a movie. It was called "John Frank's Day Off". It was a comedy, but i cried all through the movie. Jacob loved this movie. We saw it together 7 times. This movie meant something special to us. The whole time Jesse tried putting his arm around me, but i just kept pushing it away. After the movie, Jesse dropped me off around the corner from my apartment. No dinner, No goodbye. I think Jesse is realizing something i'm not. I think i have told to much about Jesse and I. I think I should tell you about Jacob and I. Before the incident, Jacob and I we inseparable. We were together every day until my dad found out that he and I were together so much. The night he heard about Jacob, he asked him to come over so he could do his "check out the boys" routine. My dad found Jacob very disapproving because of all of his muscles. My dad thought Jacob was to arrogant because of all his muscles. My dad forbid me to see Jacob, but that did not stop us from seeing each other. Every night we planned to meet by the bus stop, 5 or 6 blocks away from our houses. Chapter 3 I realized how stupid and mean I had been to Jesse the night before, so I decided to drive over to Jesse's house before he went to football practice. I glanced at my watch as I was walking out the front door of my apartment. Dang it, it was 5:49 and practice started at 6:00. Even though Jesse practically lived a minute away, he still left about five minutes before practice started. I wouldn't make it in time unless I took a shortcut- Highway 13. I raced to my car, and raced down the streets. Just as I turned onto Highway 13 I remembered what Jacob looked like as he was falling. I remembered how excited he was to take me somewhere he loved. As I drove on the bridge, I stopped the car where Jacob fell. I looked down over the edge and then i knew what i had to do to be with Jacob and how to do it. I climbed up onto the edge of the bridge. I turned around to see everybody on the bridge staring at me. Suddenly, a car pulled up, and a man jumped out. It was Jesse. As I was falling a single raindrop fell on my cheek like my teardrop fell on Jacob's. Maybe that raindrop was Jacob's teardrop. Text: ORIGINAL BOOK- NO COPYING!! All rights reserved. Publication Date: December 3rd 2010 https://www.bookrix.com/-hiyome
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-reyna-wells-a-girl-with-a-crush/
Reyna Wells A Girl With A Crush!! A High School Life/Double Life This book is dedicated to all those dreams that want to imagine themselves as something that they know isn't reality. Author's Note  I will do my best to finish this book up when I can. Til' then, enjoy what I have already written. A Normal Day Life I was walking to school when I saw my crush Brandan, wlaking right behind me! He staied right behind me in till I got the front doors of the school. It was like he was walking me to school! Well the reason why I have a crush on Brandan is because 1) he's sweet 2) HOT and 3) sensitive guy in th world. Well back to what was happenig in reality...   I was at my locker when he just happened to walk by and waved right at me. ME!! I want to faint right then an there. -It seems like he knows that I like him- I was thinking about it to myself, with my back to my locker with this love puppy written all over my face. He walked up to me and said, "Hey gourgeouse! What's with the crushing looking face?" I was about to have a heartache right then and there. He was talking to me!! "Umm...what crush looking face? No crush looking face here." I thought I covered that pretty well. "Oh really now. You where standing there like that since I walked by a few minutes ago." OMG!! He's on to me!! "Really? No one crushing here." Okay, I don't think he things that I have a crush on him when like...I MAJORALLY DO!! "I thought you did because you have had a crush on my since like, kindergarten. Say you like me to my face then." OMG!! I can't believe he just said that to me!! What am I suppose to do now?   Okay, I can do this, it's simply, just act like I'm not when...I TOTALLY AM!! I'm so digging his body right now. "Yeah, right. Why would I have a crush on you?" "Well because you think I'm totally HOT. Is there any other better reason why?" I started to think a little, I wanted to say something that might make him think off topic so I could make my run for it. "If I said that I know a girl...and that she REALLY likes you, what would you say?" Okay, that make him think for a bit. "I guess it depends on the girl...if it's you, then I would say totally, let's go on a date." OMG!! He totally is digging me. Why would he like someone like me? There's nothing really specail about me. "Well I know that she would say yes." "I'll pick you up at 7." OMG!! "Can't wait...I mean, she can't wait." I think I covered that up pretty well. Before he could leave, I did the most stupist thing a girl could do. I KISSED him on the cheek then left!! What is wrong with me?   I totally walked away from that, I think I handled that pretty well for a girl like me. I so had this butterfly feeling in my stomache. I think I might be in love!!   Later during the school...all of a sudden, my friends, who are girls, they came squealing to me at our table. They sat down and staired at me for about five minutes, with smirks on their faces. I finially said something, "What!?" One of my closest friends replyed, "You, popular girl, are going out with the popular HOT guy from the football team. It's going around the school, like, right now!" "THE WHOLE SCHOOL ALREADY KNOWS!!" "YES!! Everyone is talking about it. Does he want to like you know, kiss you?" "I don't know..." We all where talking when Brandan came and sat down with us. He sat down besides me and kissed me on the cheek!! "Hey babe! Can't wait for our date!" "Yeah, I can't wait to." OMG!! After I said that, all my girls fainted right there. They are so hoplessly in shock right now, still.   At the end of school...I was walking with Aric to my locker so we can talk about our science project. Brandan wasn't that far from where we were, he could see Aric and I talking, he started to get a little worried. He could tell that Aric was flirtting with me, he walked towards us. "Hey babe! Who is the dude?" "This is ARix, he is my best guy friend." What was up with that just now, he asked about Aric, did he think that I was going to cheat on him or something. "Oh, I knew that." Aric had to put his two scence in, "Who's the guy Ashley?" "Oh, this is Brandan, he is the captian of the football team. Also he is my boyfriend." "Like she said, I'm her guy so I would like you not to flirt with my girl, please." Aric just rolled his eye's, Brandan saw this so I put a little more force into holding on to him. "Okay, I didn't know. May bad, dude." "Brandan? It's not his fault, he didn't know." Brandan loosen a little, he was still tense though. "Okay, I know I'm sorry Ashley. I'll come by at seven to pick you up." He kissed me and walked away, he left Aric and I standing there alone. OMG!! He just left me there, even after what he said.   Later on at my house..."So...what do think about my idea?" Aric was sitting across from at the kitchen table. "Good. Oh, I have to go now." "Okay, I'll walk you to the door." We got up and headed to the door, what I didn't know was that Brandan and his friends were spying on us from the bushes. "Wait! I have something I need to give you." He walked back to where I was standing, he cupped my face and kissed me!! OMG!! That dumb ass kissed me!!    You should have seen Brandan's face, he didn't talk to me all night long. *as you can see, he picked up for the date* When he got to my house, he didn't even look at me let alone say goodnight to me. I was about to get out of the car when he finially spoke up. "Why? Why did you kiss him?" "You where there spying on me!! You don't trust me do you?" "I trust a little too much. You kissed him!!" "You should trust me and fwi...he kissed me, I didn't kiss him back." "You never kissed a boy, have you?" "No! My ex-boyfriends would always cheat on me...so I never really kissed a guy before." I lookat my lap, I was ready for him to say something would make me seem like I bad girl. "Really?! I'm sorry, I didn't know." He didn't chew out for it. "It's doesn't really matter now...we are over, apprently so bye Brandan." "WAIT!!" I had already gotten out of the car and had gone inside. I leaned agaisnt the door, I looked up the ceiling, I let all the tears roll down my face. "I will always love you, Ashley!"   The next day at school...I was at my locker getting some stuff for my first period class when a bunch of guys crowed around my locker. "Umm...hi boys! Is there something I can help you with?" I looked at them in confusion but could figure out why they are here really soon. "Well if you don't excuse me, I'm going to be late for class."  pushed my way through and walked off towards class. My first period is sciecen, ugh! The good thing is that Brandan isn't in my first class, thats a realife for me. At least I'm partner with my best friend and I hear, that his partner is Miranda. The super smart girl in my class. Well when I get to class, I don't see Aric waiting for me. I sit down where I alwasy sit. Finially our teacher, Mt. Baldwen walked in. "Goodmorning class! We will be having a new student join our class. Brandan if you would sit with Ashley, since Miranda is out sick and Aric is who knows where." That's just great, the one guy I didn't want in my class, is in my class! That's just great! He sat dow.n next to me. "Class you are to with your partner of your science project. Brandan, Ahsley, you are now partners." Everyone cheered because the smart kid, is out sick! "You may starter/or finished up." Brandan turned towards me, it looked like he wanted to say something to or about to say something to me. "Hey...I'm sorry about last night on our date. I I still love you with all my heart still babe. I can trust you, I just got jelouse that's all." "I'm sorry to. It's just that I didn't want to lose you, you are the best thing that ever happened to me." I look around, everyone was doing their project but I felt that some where trying to listen on what were talking about. I looked back at Brandan, "We need to talk...some private." "Now!!" "Now! I will ask if we can go out in the hallway so we can talk." "Okay, sounds like a good idea." "Mr. Baldwen? Can we go out in the hallway to talk about our project?" "Yes you may but....no clowing around." We got up and went to the hall. We sat a few feet from the classroom. "Okay well after I went into my house, I was thinking about you...I thought that I lost an amazing guy that was willing to protect me like that....cheesey, huh." I looked down at the ground, thinking that would keep me from seeing his face right now. "It's not chessey so you feel that way about me?" "Well yeah...how do you feel about me?" "Well...I love this amazing girl, she makes me feel like I can be myself around you...plsu she is like the HOTTEST girl I know!" He winked at me. I blushed anf giggled a little. "You are a sweety guy...any girl would lucky to be your girl." "Well I don't want just any girl...I want you!" I looked at him, he wasn't lieing about it. "Does that mean you want to get back with me, Ashley?" "I say yes!" *RING* *RING* The bell went off, everyone was leaving class, he got up and helped me up. "I'll see you later babe." I smiled and kissed on the cheek before walking away.   Later on at my house...Brittany and I were popping popcorn, we were about to watch a chick flick. We really need this girl time! I was about to get the popcorn out when I heard the doorbell. "Brittant, can you get the popcorn out, I'm going to go see who is at the door." "Okay, I will!" I walked to the front door, I had opened to see Brandan standng there. He had flowers in his hand. I was about to say something when Brittany came to my side at the door. "Hi girls! What are ya'll about to do?" "We are about to watch a chick flick. It has A LOT of romance in it, something that you don't like." "Can I come in and watch?" We both looked at each then back at him."Okay, you can come in BUT you can not invite your buddies over." He looked like I had somethng insulting. "Okay, I won't babe." I blushed at that, I could tell he noticed and smirked at me. We had sat down and watching the movie when I heard the phone ring. I got up to see who was calling. I walked back in and told that it was just mom checking up on me, making sure that things where going okay.   The next morning...when I woke up, I noticed that we all had fallen alseep in the livingroom. Brittany was on the floor asleep on pillows, Brand and I, were on the couch, right next to each other. We all were still in our clothes, thank goodness. I decided to get up and take a shower before they woke up, I was gone long when they started to stir.    They started to wake up, they still were hald a sleep when they noticed that someone was missing. They looked around and looked under things, they couldn't find me. I had finished my shower and put on my rob, I was walking down stairs, drying my hair with another towel. They all ran up to me, "Where were you?" I looked down at myself and back at them, I can't believe they just asked that. "I was up stairs in my room taking a shower, as you can see. Why?" I was looking at them confused by thier question, I wasn't sure what they were trying to get at. "We thought that someone had kiilled you! or they could have kid napped you. Well never mind that now, you are safe and sound, that's all that matters right now." "Well just to let you know, I had woken up and saw that ya'll were still asleep so I decided to go up and shower before ya'll woke up. I'm sorry that I scared you guys." I looked down at my feet then back at them, I could see that they saw that I was sorry for giving them such a fright. They looked at me and could see that I did fell bad that I scared them like that. They both gave toward me, they gave me hugs while saying, "It's okay, we just were worried about you but now we know that you were never ever hurt to begin with." "Aaawww, guys! Ya'll are the best."   At school, at my locker...I saw that Aric was walking towars me. "Hi Aric!" "Hey Ashley!" "How's it going?" "Nothing much, you?" "I heard that Brandan was over at your house." I looked at him like, how did you know that. I didn't tell anyone, only Brittant and I knew about it, unless...she went around telling people about last night. "Were you spying on us last night, in my bushes!!" He looked away from my sight. "I was there along with some of his bro's. They were thinking of going in and just starting a PARTY!!" "You did and I will hurt you personally. All three of us and fun with or without having a party. If you please reframe from saying things like that, then I will tell the office that I have someone stalking me." I turned around and walked away from him. I could tell that he is looking at my back, I kept walking till I rounded the corner to my locker.   It was lunch time now...I was sitting with my girls when Aric walked up. He acted like he wasn't going to walk by but instead he sat right next to me, he put his arm around my shoulder. "Hey babe!" "Can I help you with something?" "Well I know that you got a boyfriend and everything but that doesn't mean you can't like you know...have anouther guy to mess with." OMG!! I can't believe this ass was trying to get me to cheat on my boyfriend. "Well here's the thing sweetheart...me having a boyfriend means that I ONLY have eye's for him and JUST him." "Well then can you do my one favor? I want you to just kiss me once then I will leave you alone." I looked at him like he was on crazy pills. I can't believe he just said that though! "Why? I'm taken so that should show you that I'm not going to do that." He looked at me like he had just gotten stapped in the heart. I could tell he was about to tell me something that wasn't going to be what I wanted to hear. "Well here's the thing sweety, your popluar and HOT so there are your reason's to be my girlfriend instead." OMG!! I can't believe him!! "You know what, you stay here and I will be right back once I visit the bathroom." i got up and my girls followed me, I was trying to find a way to get away from him and he's loud month.  Brandan was sitting close by and could hear every word that was said. He was proud of me that I stood up and defended out relationship. He couldn't help but smile at how I handled things.   I had thrown my trash away and then put my tray on the tray rack. I decided then leaving then I just headed over to where Brandan was with his bor's. I found him sitting a few tables away from ours, I headed in that direction before Aric could see me. When I got closer, I could tell that he was with five other boys. I saw a sit open for me to sit down so I took the spot. "Hey babe!" He gave me a kiss on the cheek, I sat down next to him. "Hey sweety! Anyting new?" He point at Ryan so he could tell me what they were planning. "Hey! I'm Ryan. I'm having a party at my house." "What does that have to do with me?" "He wants us to be the guest of honor." "Okay, I'll go. What type of party is it?" "I'' text you when I'm ready. See you later sweety." I got up and kissed on the cheek and headed of the cafateria. I had left the cafateria when Ryan had said something surprised Brandan. "Why did you tell her that you would pick her up? She would have been there with her girls later on" "I would be the first time to see her in a two piece swim suit, I want to be the first one to see my girlriend in one." That made much more sense after he has explained his reasoning.   While at the mall...I was looking for a new two piece swim suit. When Aric walked in, he was watching us the whole time we were looking. I could tell that he was watching from somewhere in the store. I just ignored him. I was trying ones that I thought that would look good on me. I was looking for hours it felt like, I had finially found the one that would make Brandan drool.  The Pool Party At my house...I was putting on my swim suit with a shirt that shows a little of my belly and booty shorts. I was about to put my cute sandals when I heard the door. I ran down stairs with shows in hand, I opened  the door, there stood Brandan waiting for me. He looked me up and down. "Wow! You look HOT! I might need to watch the boys to make sure they flirt with my girl." "Thanks! I'm glad you like it, I bet you should watch your boys. Who knows if they would make a move or not." "Well let's go show off on how HOT you look. I want them to see my beautiful girlfriend." We got in the car and drove to Ryan's house. I wasn't sure what would happen while the pool party was going on. I was actually neverous a little.   We have arrived shortly, we got out and walk around the house to the gate. I could see the pool, it was HUGE!! We walked in and everyone cheered for us. I felt like a queen with my king. Ryan had a table reserved for just Brandan and I, I walked over to the table and started to take my shirt and shorts off. The minute I turned around with my two piece full shown, he was drooling like a dog wanting his bone. I tourched him a little right before I dived in, I swam over to my girls who were going crazy over my swim suit. I was chatting with my girls by the side of pool, when Brandan decided to get in and do a little surprise on me. He dived in and swam up under me, he lefted me up on his shoulders. I took that minute to his eigth pack and how his muscles where...OMG!! What I'm I thinking right now. I flet so honored to have this HOT of a boyfriend treating me like his princess. *fwi it's a hot pink bikni withblack rim around the edges, just in case you were wondering*    I got out for a breather when...all the girls came around me. It was like I was a celebrate or something. I was sitting at our table when thier boyfriend came up to them and asked them something. They left and I was sitting there all alone. Brandan saw how lonely I was and came and sat down next to me, he out his around me. We sat there for hours talking and laughing, it was the best moment ever!! I could tell the other girls were jelous that they couldn't have him. Ryan came out on the stage, "How are ya'll doing tonight!! I have a special band that will be performing for ya'll. Enjoy!" *fwi it is my band, did i forget to tell you that...sillly me*   Band members:   Brandan-lead guitorsit Ryan-drumer My girls-back up singers Mick-bass guitar Ashley-lead singer   We are: The Dreamers    We walked up on stage, the crowd was going wild. We started off with out #1 hit... "I Need You!!"  We were killing it out, the song was about over when I noticed the boys in the crowd where drooling over me. I noticed that Brandan notice that they were. When the song was over, Brandan walked over to me, he planted to most passionte kiss on me right then and there. OMG!! My beat was beating so fast that I bet he could have heard it. No had noticed Aric get on stage, Brandan had finished the kiss when next thing I knew, he had gotten punched!! I ran to Brandan's side, "Brandan! Brandan! BRANDAN!!" He shock it off and stood up. "Why did you punch my boyfriend?" I looked at him for answer. Aric had planned this out the minutes he got on stage with us. "I'll make a deal with you..." I looked at him like I could tell what was coming next. "You kiss me right here, in front of everyone, even your boyfriend." I looked at everyone and back at Brandan, he was as mad as I was especiall after hearing his stupid deal.  "Babe?" I turned around and looked at him, I could tell in his eye's that he just wanted to get it over with. "Just do it babe. He said after you did, he would leave us alone." I looked back at Aric, I knew I should just get it over with so he would be away from us. I walked up to him, "Okay, fine. I will let you kiss me." He had this big smirk on his face, he apprently knew something that I didn't know. He acted like he was putting breath mint in he mouth. He breathed it out on me so I could smell it.   He knows, that everyone knows, that everyone goes to magic school. Yes, there is a school for magical beings. He also knows that if I kiss him, he gets to take all my powers away. What aht means for me, I'm under his control, like there is no one of getting me out from under his control. Which in other words means...I fall madly in love with him. That isn't a good thing.   I leaned in to kiss him, but he dippes me. He kissed me square on the lips. He put me back to standing straight up. "HAHAHAHA!! Now, I have all her love power!!" I didn't know what he was talking about and everyone else just look like he was comepetly crazy. "She belongs to me now Brandan." I looked at him in honor, what?! I could feel something tingling, I saw a glow coming around me. All of sudden I turned a well different version of me. *fwi same person but differnt clothes and attitude* Everyone was confused, they couldn't understand why I couldn't help them anymore. He walked up beside me and wrapped a arm around my waist. There was part of me that wanted to just push him away but I couldn't. I couldn't even tell Brandan that all of this wasn't the real me. I had walked up to him, I wanted to so badly say that this isn't me. I was able to force it to kiss him. Minutes later I was back to my old self. I had gotten the power that I never knew I had, back from Aric. The werid thing is, he turned into a little five year old boy. Once the pary was over, Brandan took me home.   The Sweet Night & The Situation Yet To Come At my front door..."Well that was really fun up intill he changed me. That wasn't the funnies thing in the world. "Yeah...but I am glad that I ave my girl back. He leaned toward me and kissed me passionatly. I was so flastered that I didn't even know that I was kissing him back. I had opened the door and we have been able to walk inside, we were standing in the living room, practically making out. When we finially parted for some air, I has to ask him something I knew that we both would like. "Do you umm...want to like...stay over for the night? It's Saturday so it isn't going to really matter that much..." He stopped me by kissing me. OMG!! That was like the best way to make me shut up. "So...is that a yes?" "That's a BIG fat yes."    We both changed into our pajamas. *fwi he went home to get his pajamas* I had on a pink tank with black booty shorts. I look really good! Lol!! We sat down on the couch together, I had leaned against him, I put my head on his shoulder. In now time, we had both fallen asleep. I wasn't sure when but I have fallen asleep on his shoulder, he had his head on mine.    All of a sudden I heard the door bell. I tried to get up but was too sleepy to get up. "Sweety?" "What is it babe?" "Someone is at the door." "Well what do you want me to do about it babe?" "Can you go see who it is." He got up and walked to the door, he opened it and there was my MOM!! "Who are you?" "I am Ashley's mom. Who are you?" "I'm Ashley's boyfriend, Brandan." I walked to the door the best I coul, before I could say anything, I fell back asleep. Good thing Brandan catched me and put on the couch. My mom looked like she just something that freaked her out. "What in the hell did you do to my daughter!!" He looked at her, wtf!! "Go to the kitchen right now!!" He walked toward the kitchen, he didn't want to find out what would happen if he didn't. He went into the kitchen and poured himself some juice.   I had wolken up, I looked around, I couldn't find Brandan anywhere. I walked into the kitchen thinking that he had gotten him something to drink. I saw my mom standing in the kitchen instead. "Where did Brandan go?" "He well left honey. Why do you ask?" "Because I love him mom!! You had no right to do that to him." "Well honey...I found you a better guy though. He's name is Steven, he's supper hot." I couldn't stand there and take that. I ran up stairs to my room crying, I can't believe she did that to Brandan.    I had been in my room for a couple a minutes when I heard a knock on the door. "Go away mom!!" "It's not your mom, it's your boyfriend. Can I come in?" "Is my mom with you by any chance?" "No, she isn't with me." "Alright, you can come in then." He came in and sat down on the bed next to where I was laying. I turned my face toward him, he leaned down and started kissing me. "WAIT!!" He looked at me, like he didn't know what was wrong. "Why? Is was getting really good." "I know but..." I looked down at my hands then back at him. "I need to lock the door first." I looked away again, I wasn't sure what he would say about it. "Oh! Okay, heary babe." I got up and locked the door, I turned aroudn and looked at him smiling. I walked to the bed, I was motioning him to come to me. He walked over to me and started kiss me. We fell over on the bed, kissing passionaly. Romance With The Boyfriend/Unexpected Meeting It has been 25 minutes at least...we where on the bed in our pajamas. *fwi we didn't go all the way as you can tell* I was about to say something to him when I heard the door bell. I got up to, looked out the window to see someone standing there. Brandan had gotten up and walked over to where I was looking. "Who is that babe?" I looked at him, "I think my mom doesn't like you so...she invited that dude over. That's why I was crying earlier." I could tell him was starting to get angry. "Oh, babe? Do you want me to beat him up for you?" "No...not yet. I have a plan, just stick close till you hear the key word for you to step in. He looked at me like I had just lost it. "What is it?" "I can flirt with him then call you when he started to like you know, get a little grabbie. But first, I need to get something HOT on." He looked at me, he didn't think I could become this kind of way. "Okay, what are you going to wear then?" I looked at him, it was like he didn't even now me. "It's a short dress and have a low v-neck." I went to my closet, i shut the door. I came out and he was checking me out. "Yeah! This is work with that kind of outfite babe." Before I left, he kissed me on the lips for good luck.   I went down stairs and I could hear my mom tlaking to this guy Steve. "There's my lovely daughter." "You look...HOT Ashley. Can we date?" I looked at him, like wtf man, I just met you and now you are wanting to date me, something isn't right there. "Well why don't we get to know each other better before thinking about dating.""Okay, that sound duable, where shall we talk? We can sit here or up in your room?" I looked at him, you just fell right into a new trap I set up. I looked at him, I tird my best to look the sexiest that I could. "Okay, that's fine with me. Let me just go put something away first." I turned around an ran upstairs. I told Brandan the new plan, he hid the closet till it wast time for him reveal himself.   I had gone back down stairs to get Steven, I lead to me room, as we were headed that way, I couldn't help thinking...what was he planning to do in my room. We had reached were my room was, I opned it and offered him to come in. "Ladies first." He was trying to cover something he was planning up witht at act of his. He came in behind me, I heard the door close, I turned around to see him lock the door. He walked over to my bed and tried his best to sit hot. I wanted to puke in my mouth. "So cute boy...I have something to tell you." He looked at me, he seemed to think that it was about him. "Okay, what is sweet thang?" I walked over to the closet, "I would like you to met my boyfriend, Brandan. Just to warn you, he doesn't like when other boys try to touch what belongs to him." Brandan wallked out, he put his arm around my waist. I could tell that he was staring daggers at him.    Steven couldn't believe that he fell for my trap. He was starting to act strang...he then said something that started to make me think about what's going on in his mind. "FINE!! I don't need that piece of trash..." I started to cry into Brandan's chest. "Yea I said it, she is a piece of TRASH!!" Brandan let go of his grip on, he pushed me behind him. ""Lookat what you did to that beautiful face of hers!! She doesn't need to be told that and I'm going to tech you a leasson about saying that kind of stuff to my girlfriend." Steven just looked at us, he was started to laugh. "You are guys are compelte idiots. I don't want the girl...I want their money." I was able to stop crying to say, "You are fat jerk!! No one girl needs a guy like you in their life."    He walked right towards me, he rasided his hand and slapped me across the face. I fell to the floor, I hit my closet door with a big THUD. I opened my eyes to see that they boys were fight now. I looked up just as Steven punch Brandan in the mouth. I fell to the floor with blood coming out. I ran to his side. I looked at Steven, he was such a bully. I started to think that someone needed to stop him and fast. Next thing I knew, he was walking towards Brandan. I used my powers, love, to portect the one I love. He kept hitting the sheild, harder and harder. I finially collasped under all that pressure. He saw that we both were down, he knew the job was done and left.    When Brandan woke up, he saw that I was tending to his bloddly noise. He sat up the best he could, with the help from me as well. He pulled my face towards him, he planted a kiss on right there. I didn't care about the blood, I was able to hold my boyfriend. The Phone Call/Explaining My mom heard the phone ring, she then called for me to come down stairs. I looked at Brandan, letting him know that I would be right back.    I walked down stairs to see what my mom needed from me. She told me that Brittant was on the phone and that she was trying to call since seven. "What's up?" "The princeapal wants all the non-pops (popular=pops). to got to school today." I was confused by what she said. "Then...why are you telling me this?" "He's popular!! He's the leader of the basketball team, remember?" "Oh yeah...never mind then." I was still confused why she called to tell me that. "Okay well...I will talk to you later girl." "Okay, bye" I hung up the phone, I was about to go up stairs when my mom stopped me in my tracks. "Where's Steven?" "He's gone but Brandan and I are going to be up in m room so later, bye."  I turn around an run the stairs before my mom could say something about it. I got back to my room, Brandan was laying on my bed, he looked asleep. I took a second to just look at how cute he is sleeping. I walked over to where he was and sat down beside him, I felt a strong arm around my waist. Brandan had pulled me down next to him. I grabbed my radio remote and turned on some music. We just laied there talking, laughing and what ever couple does, we kissed ever now or then. We had finally fall sleep around ten, it was school so we did stuff that make our energy run out so we could sleep. The New Student I had woken up before Brandan did, i was busy putting on my skirt/w leggings and boots. I had a really hot shirt to that. I was ready for school. I had to wake Brandan up before we became late. While he was getting ready, I went down stairs to get my key sot my convertiable. Brandan was drive so I could sit the passanger spot for once, what she doesn't know won't hurt her. We ha arrived at school, we could see him bro's and my girls waiting for us. We got out, well Brandan got out and came around to open the door so I could get out. The girls needed to talk to me, it's time for private girl time.   At lunch...my girls boyfriends, where sitting with my Brandan at their table. We all heard that there was a new kid, we haven't seen him yet though. We walked over and sat with the boys. We saw where they were, we started to walk in their direction. "Who's the hot girl?" "Who" Brandan started to search the room for who he was talking about. "The one that's walking this direction." Brandan finailly saw that he was talking about me, he had werid feeling but ignored it and answer him. "Her? That's my girlfriend, Ashley." "Is she popular?" Brandan looked at him all confused by what he said. "Yeah, why?" "I want to meet her, Brandan." He wasn't sure what he meant but he answered anyway. "Sure, it looks like they are coming this way anyway." They looked back at us, we weren't that far from where they were sitting now. I walked to where Brandan was sitting but there wasn't enough room for me. he tunred out a little so I could sit on his lap. I sat down, "Hey babe." I kissed him on the cheek, "Hey sweety." We just all sat talking and I didn't notice a new face at the table yet. "Oh babe...I would like you to meet our new friend Matthew." I looked at where he gustering to, I looked at him a minute that waved, "Hi Matthew, I'm Ashley." He looked at me, "I think you are the cutest girl in our school." I couldn't but blushed at that. "That isn't ture, everyone girl is beautiful in their own way." I looked at Brandan then remembered why I came over in the first place. "Oh Brandan, I have something to tell you." I couldn't help but smile as I said it. "Okay, what is it babe?" He looked at my confused by the question then saw that I was smiling about it as well, he starting to have a strange feeling about what I was about to ask. "My girls and I, are having a party, we are inviting our whole grade. Can you please spread that around our class?"  "Okay, I can do that, just tell me what else I can do to help ya'll out." I smiled and kissed him square the lips. I could tell Matthew was excited by what I said a few minutes ago. I got up, kisses Brandan on the cheek, and walked away with my girls talking about the party. Preparing For The Party  Later on at my house...let me describe to you my house. *fwi I live by myself since my mom has her boyfriend over all the time so I decided they need their "space" so I moved out and I got a pretty good house* It's a two-story house, has four bedrooms and two bathrooms. I also have a kitchen, a den, livingroom, a BIG game room. I also have a HUG backyard. My backyard also has a pool, a hot tube and a dance floor with a DJ, it came with it. I did I mention that I have tons of chairs and drinking bar. If you wondering, i moved in a week ago and everything I owned, moved to this house. Well enough about my house, let's get back to the party that is going to be happening soon. Pool Party I was putting on my newest swim suit, I was going to wait for the guests to arrive. The first people t show up was Brandan and Matthew. Every since they got there, Matthew wouldn't leave my side, it was getting annoying. I thought that diving into the deep end would make it stop...which it did. Brandan noticed that he was staying close by, he decided that it was time for the boyfriend that he is, to protect the one he loves. He stopped hanging around me for now. He hangs around just not close, he is watching for Matthew trying to get next to me.   I'm happy that Brandan is watching my back, well that only person he does have to watch for is Matthew.  Everyone was having a lot of fun!! I'm glad to see they are. Since I moved in, I added a few rooms in the backyard, just in case a emergency happens. MY girls, they rented a room for the night, I think Brandan's going to ask me something right now. He's walking in my direction, just watiching him came towards me with his eight pack, that sends butterfly's in my stomach. "Hey babe, I need to ask you something?" I was trying to keep my cool but I couldn't help from smiling.  "Sure, what's on your mind." I was thinking that he was going to ask about the rooms in the backyard but what he asked me, it really made me feel really low. "Why does Matthew hang around you a lot?" He was looking around to see if he was near by. I just stood there, I wasn't sure what to say to him. He was asking me something I didn't know the answer to and it was really getting my hopes up. "I don't know..." I looked away, I felt like he was only caring about why he was then how I feel about it. I honestly thought that he was going to ask me something important but...it didn't turn out that way. "You kissed him, didn't you!!"  "WHAT!! I would never do that, you should know that better than anyone else!!" I CAN'T BELIEVE HE JUST SAID THAT TO ME!! WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS!! I WOULD NEVER KISS ANOTHER GUY INTILL I GOT HIS PERMISION FIRST!! UGH!! "Then explain why he is following you everywhere then." I looked away from him, I had tear falling down my cheek. I looked right back at him and looked in the eye. "I don't know...he might have a crush on me. I'm not sure, I hardly ever talked to the guy, I did when I was with you then that was it." Brandan looked at me like I was trying to show that nothing was going on bewtween me and him. "He can't date you though, you are my girlfriend. I'm not letting anyone take you away from me." He cupped my face with his strong hand. I looked at his beauitful blue eye's.  "Then go ask him, Mr. Tough guy." I started to joke with him, I came to his side, got on my tippy toes, I kissed him on the cheek. He smiked at me. "I will smart mouth." He grabbed me, dipped me and planted a kiss on me. I couldn't stop my heart from beating so fast.   We walked together to find where Matthew was in the backyard. When he found him, he was making love eye's in my direction. I stepped behind Brandan so he could see that I wasn't sure why he was doing that towards me. I followed behing Brandan. "Why are you always by my girl?" He said rather loudly, everyone turned around looked at us. "I don't know what your talking about dud. I can't believe that you are acusing me of something I'm not even doing." He tired to sound like he didn't do anyting wrong when we all know that he has been "You have near my girl, Ashley. Ever since you showed up here. Why can't you leave my girl alone?" Everyone crowded around to see what was going on. "Who's Ashley?" He was trying to act like he didn't even know me now. "My girlfriend, Ashley. Remember, you met her at school today." "Oh, that's Ashley? I did met her, I didn't know she was your girlfriend though." "Well now that you know who she is, can you please stay away from her then. You are making her uncomfortable." "Fine...I didn't even like her anyway, dude."  "Good! Now I think it's best that you leave now..."  He turned around, he headed to the door so he could leave. Everyone went back to what they were doing. I could tell that Brandan was still upset about the whole Matthew thing.   He walked away from where I was, he dived into the deep, swam to the other side and just sat there. I felt bad for him, all the guys try to get close to me and date me, I'm causing him so much pain.    After everyone had left and my girls went to their rooms (the ones they rented). I was sitting at a table, drinking a cold water. I saw Brandan get up from where he was, he walked over to where I was. He sat down near me.  "We need to talk..." "Okay, what about?" I got this feeling deep in my stomach that what he wants to talk about, it isn't going to make me happy in the end. "I think we should umm..." "Are you trying to break up with me? Why?" "All the guys...like you. I don't thik I can do this anymore..." I looked at him, I couldn't tell if he was doing this for us or just for the sake of him. "I will always love you...but, if that's the way you feel then...fine. Good bye Brandan." I didn't touch him or try to give him a kiss on the cheek. I just got up and walked away, when I knew I was far enough, I ran the rest of the way to the house. Brandan looked back at me running to the house, he could tell that it hurt me to hear that from him. He had a single tear roll down his cheek. The Hard Day At school the next day...it was a lame morning. It was lunch time before I knew it. I turned my happy face on so my girls wouldn't worry about me.   I grabbed my lunch, I walked to where my girls where waiting for me. The minute I sat down, the questions started.  "What's wrong, Ashley?" Brittany could tell that something was wrong. "Brandan dumped me last night, right after the pool party." I looked like I wanted to cry but I wasn't about to cry over it. It was his choice to do that so I'm going to move on and be with my girls.   "Why does Ashley look happy?" "I don't know, why?" "Because she is sitting over there with a really hot guy." "What?! Your joking with me bro." "No I'm not. Turn around and look for yourself than." Brandan turned around and looked in the direction Ryan was talking about. Sure enough, there I was sitting with a hot guy, talking and laughing. He started to get mad, but he needs to remember that he was the one that dumped me. "How does she already have another guy?" "Dude, your not popular anymore." "What are you talking about?" "Because your not her boyfriend anymore. She has turned more popular than you are. Your not popular anymore." "Dang! I regrete dumping her now..." "I know bro..."   During the day...Brandan would see walk around with him. This guy's name is Issac. I would look all happy and I would be on his arm. It looked like I was really happy but I wasn't happy at all. The Hard Situation  One day...Ryan was following Issac and I, when I thought that we were alone. I brought up something surprised me and Ryan at the same time. "Okay...where's my money?" "You have to act like my girlfriend three more days than you can have your worth. Your single so you shouldn't be worrying about your relationship states right now." "I know...you lied to me then. HELP!! SOMEONE HELP!!" Ryan ran to where Brandan was sitting in the cafateria. He told him everything he heard, they started running to where he last saw us.   They were right around the corner when they saw something that shouldn't have been seen. Issac was slapping me, he was letting me drop to the floor and pick me back up, he did it over and over again. Brandan couldn't watch as he kept doing that to me. Brandan did something he didn't think he would ever do. "Let her go!!" Issac and I turned to see Brandan standing there. Issac let me drop to the floor, he walked a little towards him. "Who's going to stop me?" "ME!! I'm going to stop you." Issac started to walk more towards him, I could only watch as things happened right before my eye's. "Don't hurt Brandan, please!!" "Shut up Ashley!!" "Leave her alone I said!!" Brandan punched him, kicked him, that didn't last long when Issac fell to the ground all beat up. When Brandan knew he wouldn't be getting up any time soon, he walked over to I was. He gave me his hang to get up, I shouldn't have taken it but I did. "Thank you. Well I should be going...bye Brandan." As I walked away, he turned around and watched, yet again. "WAIT!!" "What?" He walked towards me, I didn't move or anything, nothing made me move away. My heart started to beat really fast. He cupped my face and passionatly kissed me. I couldn't believe that he could kiss this good. That felt like it last for ten minutes at least. We finially parted, he looked at me, I felt like I was going to cry. "Ashley...I can't stop thinking about you. Day and night, I love you, I can't pictured my life without you." I just looked at him then smiled at him. "I feel the same way...but we sren't the best together though. When you said that you couldn't handle on the guys, I thought about it, I couldn't handle all the girls that would get around you. "Does that mean your not my girlfriend then?" "I just think that we need a break for a while, doesn't mean we can't talk but there isn't going to anything else besides friendship." I wasn't sure what he would say about what I just said but I could tell it broke his heart and that he was getting angry. I could tell he felt used for helping me now, I could tell that he was going to say something. "Fine! Who needs a cheating girlfriend anyway." I looked at him, started walking away with tears rolling down my eye's. When I turned the corner was when Ryan saw me, he went with me so he could make sure I didn't something that I would regrete.   Back where Brandan was staning... "Why did I say that to her. She won't take me back. I feel teriable that I said that to her. How can I show her that I love her and don't want to break up again?   He stood in the hallway till he heard the bell ring. He saw me at my locker, his classroom is near my locker and he didn't really think that it was the best to walk right by me right now. I got my stuff and headed to class, now he could get to his class. The one thing that I don't really like right now, he has the same class as me right now. The good thing is that our seats are no where near each other. The teacher finially walked in, it took the tenchion out of the air. I was busy writing to noticed Brandan was watching me. I wasn't going to pat attention, i wanted to writie my story. I was writing about a princess and her handsome prince charming.  Brandan writes, about wars and wizards. He is very childish. I shouldn't be the one talking, I to write some childish stories.   Our class was over, I ran out of there as fast I could. I alwasy go to my locker before heading home, also to meet Issac but he is history now. Brandan left the classroom first because he wanted to talk to me, he knew I always went to my locker before heading home. Lol!! I wasn't going to my locker today, I was heading straight home. He stood there waiting, he finially realized that I had already left. I had gone home because my mom told me to come straight home after school was over. Mom Strikes Again  Brandan drove up to my house. He saw a car that he has never seen here before. He walked up to the door, he heard voices inside. He couldn't tell if it was me or not, he listened till he though it was stupid and just knocked on the door.   I was inside talking to me mom and this random guy. i heard the door bell, I opned it, there stood Brandan smiling. "You made it! I leaned in, kissed him on he lips. "Come on in sweety." I said tha rather loudly. He walked in, I could tell that he was confused about what was going on.  "Brittant, ARic, this is Brandan. This is Brittany and her boyfriend Eric. Brandan sat down next to me and put his arm around me. We all talked intill Brittant and Eric had to leave. Now it was Brandan and I. "Wy did you call me your boyfriend?" "Well here's the think, I told her all about us, she wanted to come see you. She doesn't that we had broken up yet, I haven't told her yet." "Oh, okay. Bye then!" He walked towards the door, I was about to regrete what i was about to ask. "Wait Brandan." He turned around, he looked at me. "What is it?" "Do you have a crush on someone?"  I shouldn't have asked that, I should already know that the answer to that. "Yeah, why are you asking?" "Is she pretty? Does she like you back?" "I hope she still loves me. She is the prettiest girl in school though." "I think she still love you as a boyfriend..." "She does?!" "Yeah, what's her name though?" "I will always trust her for now on. Her name is, Ashley Martin." "Oh Brandan...I love you too!"   I ran into his arms, we kissed. Ever time I kiss him, i alwasy fall back in love with him. "Brandan, do you really do love me, right?" "Yes! I have had a crush on you since kindergarten." "Really?! Your just like me in away." By tehn, we were sitting on the couch, in front of the fire place. We bout fell asleep.    When I woke up, Brandan was gone! I got up, looked around for him. No sign of him anywhere!  Uneasy Day  Later on at school...I was at my locker, fixing my make-up when Brandan was leaning against the locker next to mine. We started talking and laughing, holding hands. The other students noticed, it seemed that I only look happy when I'm with Brandan. My friends noticed it as well. We held hands while we were walking to class. Call me crazy but it looked like we were in love, when we get to our classroom, we would depart and go to our seats, depending on which class we were going to.   We both go the Mr. Baldwen's class, science. I sit by the window sometimes.  "Brittany and Miranda are sick this week so Brandan, Ashley, ya'll will be partners." Brandan walked over to where I was sitting, when he sat down, Mr. Baldwen started with what we had to do today. "You can finish your projects, you begin."   I turned toward Brandan, we smiled at each other. We were smart and worked on it during the week end so we had finished early. "Mr. Baldwen?" "Yes Ashley." "What do we do when we have finished the project?" "You can read, go to the libary, draw but ONLY the popular's can text." Brandan and I looked at each other, we smiled then pulled out our phones.   "I can't believe that we can text during class!!" "I know! What do you want to talk about?" "I don't really know. What are you doing for Christmas break?" "My mom is coming, my cousins and thier kids. What about you?" "My family doesn't really care...they don't care what I do anymore plus they stopped doing Christmas together..." "I'm sorry to hear that...I have an idea!" "What is it? Don't leave me hanging babe." "Well you can spend Christmas with me...but my mom doesn't like you that much though. What do you say?" "Okay, when do you want me there?" "Before my family comes, so they can meet you before my mom does." "Okay, what time though?" "I guess around twelve but some come around eleven-thirty." "Okay, thanks for letting me spend it with ya'll, babe." "Welcome! That's what girlfriend are for, aren't they?"    By then the bell rang, we turned our phones off and left the classroom. We were walking to my locker, holding hands as usual, when my friends were thinink that we were up to something. We were at my locker when Issac walked up to us. "Babe, why are holding hands with him and not your actual boyfriend." I was about to punch him when I turned around and looked at him, dead in the eye. ""Your not my boyfriend, you slapped me more than once, you kept doing it over and over. That kind of guy will not be my boyfriend, plus I already have one." "Maybe I should it again since you didn't learn your lesson little girl." Brandan started to get really angry, I was wondering when he would show that he was angry. He finially stepped in like I knew he would. "You need to leaver her alone already." "Who's going to make me?" I started to feel a little scared now, I don't like when someone is trying to start a fight with Brandan when all he's trying to do is, protect the one he loves. "ME! That's who." I got out from behind Brandan and stood in between them, I'm going to try to make sure that they don't fight right here in school. I don't want Brandan exspended because he was trying to protect me. "STOP!! Issac, we are over. Get that through your head already. My heart and love is to only to Brandan, no one else." "Fine! Id on't need you, there are plenty of girls that would want to go out with all this." "You should go look for her then...she's probably long gone by then cutie." I made face when I said that to him, I made sure he didn't take it as something also, other then a sarcasim thing towards his girl. He finially walked away after a while, he didn't say anything but he just turn, walked away without saying anything. "Nice one babe." i started to realized that the people around us, they heard everything that was going on. I doubt that he would find a girlfriend now, sucker!   I noticed that they were also paying attention to what he did and said together. They started to realize that we were in ded together and no one, I mean no one could break us a part. The Un-needed Meeting At my house...I was picking out an outfit for the Christmas Eve, when I heard the door bell. I was hoping it was Brandan. I went down stairs to see who it was when...IT WAS MY MOM!! I started to feel now, Brandan would get here when my mom is already here. Later on, the rest of them showed up. I didn't want to throw them out and make them wait till Brandan got here. I knew my mom came to give me something early but I wasn't sure if it was going to be something that I didn't really want. "Where is my early Christmas present?" "It will be here any minute now, daughter." "Okay, mom. I guess I can wait then." "Okay, Ashley." I'm starting to really hate when my mom does that to me. I was taken away from my thoughts when I heard the door bell. I went to answer the door to see...Brandan!  "I'm here, babe." "Come on in, please." "Okay..is she early? Is that way you are acting this way." "Yeah but please come on in."   He cam in, I shut the door behind him. I lead him to where my parents where, they were sitting on the couch in the livingroom.   "Mom, look who it is?" My mom turned around expecting someone else. "What is he doing here?" I looked at dad for help, he just looked at me like I should know that he wasn't going to go against her. I shot mom my 'stop or your going to make me leave the house again.'   "That's a long story on why he's here but you need to be nice or we can leave." "Fine but...why isn't he with his family though?" I looked at her like she was ensane, I shot her a look of ' your really going to ask that when I already said that it was going to be a long-ish story about why he is here.  "MOM!! Your being very rude, you are making to where I will leave. He is my boyfriend and you are not allowed to be rude in my house, mother." "Oh look, I think I smell my cookies." I shot her another glare, ' your really going to do that.'   She left for the kitchen, I turned toward Brandan, I could tell he was thinking of walking out. I pulled him from his thoughts, I grabbed his arm, I looked at him like...' please don't go sweety.'  He sent me a look, he was showing me that he okay and wouldn't go. "I have something for you babe." "You shouldn't have gotten me something, I feel bad now. I didn't get you anything." "It's okay, being here with you, it's present enough and here." "I'll put under the tree, I'll open it when it's time."   He placed it under the tree, I sat down on the couch as he put his coat on the back of the couch. He sat down next to me, put his arm around me.   It felt like hours till i heard the door bell again. This time mom, she ran to it before anyone else could answer. She motioned for me to sitt back down while she got the door, I could hear voices but wasn't sure what she had in minded. I could tell that she was excited about something but wasn't sure what. I then heard a male voice that i have heard before. I got up, Brandan looked at me funny, I walked to the door with Brandan behind me. You will never guess who was at the door...my ex Ken. "Ashley, look who's here." I looked at him, glared and turned my head away from him. "MOM! Why is that jerk here? He's in my house, you can't go an invite whoever you want, this is m house." I could tell that Ken was smiling at me, I didn't want to look but I had to. He was smiling and I just glared at him. I didn't want him here, there were reasons why I got away from him. "Ashley, you look beautiful." Brandan stepped in his way. "Nice to see you to, Brandan." "Why are you here?" "I'm here for Ashley." "You are a little bit too late Ken." "Ken leave, right now."   All of a sudden...my parents were all tied up on the wall. Brandan was also like my parents where. "BRANDAN!!" I saw a glow around me, he changed my clothes. "Leave her alone Ken!" "Not intil she dumps the sorry likes of you...and dates me." He smile, smirked when he saw that Brandan wasn't happy. They both were looking at me, it was like they wanted me to make choice right now but if I choose the wrong thing, Brandan could get hurt because of me. I can't live with myself if that happens. There is only one thing I can do. I looked Ken right in the eye, smirked then held my hands out (like a croos). "I renounce my powers!!" I float into the air, I was glowing. Minutes later, ever once of my powers where gone. I fell to the floor. Ken was mad, my parents and Brandan were released. Brandan ran over to where I was laying... "Why did you do that?' "I didn't want...Ken to hurt you because of me." "But that means..." "Yes, I know. I'm gonna miss you teriably." "No...you can't leave me here. I need you." "I knew this would happen when I did that, I did it, to protect you. Please understand, Brandan. I love you too much to see you get hurt because of me." "NNOO...you can't leave me yet. Ashley come back!!" I started to disappear from in his arms. All my stuff moved to another locker, I was now back at a normal house (but wihtout my parents though).   Back where Brandan was...he was sitting in the lot of where my house use to be.  "I will find you Ashley, I will find you." Normal Life/ Normal School  It was after Christmas break now...I went to a normal school this morning. The only thing that I still have of that's still me, I'm still the best at everything. I walked to where my locker was, I could tell that there were boys checking me out. I didn't care, I wasn't interested in them. I had opened my locker, on the door was Brandan and I at the park during the summer last year. I couldn't bare to look at it, I took it off and put it on the shelf in my locker. A boy name James wlaked up to me, I heard that he is the captain of the football team. "Hi, I'm James! What's your name, new girl?" "Ashley, nice to met you James." "Want to hang out some time? It's the first day, it's going to be an easy day." "One questio first?" "Sure, what is it?" "Do you have a girlfriend?" "No, why?" "I don't like to hang out with other girls boyfriends." "Oh okay, I promise that I don't have one." "Okay...what do you want to do?" He showed me around the school, I met his bros. Some of the girls who are his friends, they welcomed me into their group. Ya know, this might be the best thing that happened to me. One Year Later Brandan, he tried to find away to get into a normal school so he can see during and be able to see me after.   "You should try out for cheerleadering." "Okay, when is it?" "During lunch." James and I, we are still like best friends but I don't know, there may be something there.    I went to try out and the weirdest thing happened...they elegted me as there captain. I didn't know that they didn't their captain that well, but I'm glad that I am. I am a good leader though.   After school...we were having out first practice on the football filed when the football players came out to pratice. The grils waved to their boyfriends as the came out, the only one who I'm guessing doesn't have a girlfriend is James.   After pratice was over, I was still in my uniform, I went looking for James. I found him at his locker, gathering up his stuff to leave. I ran up to him and jumped on his back, he laughed as he let me donwe. "Guess what?" "What?" I couldn't help but notice his smile. "Your looking at the new captain for the cheerleaders." "Congragulates!" He gave me a hug.   Brandan was out in the bushes, waiting for me to come out of school. He saw me walking out with James. Brandan started to jump to conclusions about what's going on. I waved bye to James as I headed to my car. I heard someone yell something, I turned around and James was running towards me. "Wait, don't go yet." "What is it?" "I want to ask you something since the begining of the year so I'm going to ask you now." "Okay, what is it?" "Do you want to be my girlfriend?" "YES!!" I jumped into his arms, I hugged him around the neck as he held me around the waist. He put me back down. "That means I will see you at the game tomorrow then, babe." "Totalm swety." Be both hugged one more time then headed off in different directions. The Big Game I was at my locker in my uniform, I was getting ready for my first class. James walked up behind me and wrapped me his arms around my waist then moved to where he could see my face. "Hey babe! Looking good in your uniform." "Thanks sweety! Your looking good in your jacket, cause like you know..." I looked down at the floor, he put his hand under my chin, he lifted it up so I would look at him. He smiled at me, I think I'm blushing. "Thanks babe."   RING RING   "I'll see you at lunch sweety." "Okay, be careful babe." I looked back at him like  'arent' I always carful.'   He smiled and went back to walk to his class.   I got to class, my new best friend in Mr. Lean's class sit with me. Mr. Lean walked in, he didn't look that good alright.  "Class, we have a new student joining us today. Everyone please welcome Brandan Smith." "Hey everyone!" OMG!! NO!! How did he get here, I though magical beings couldn't be in the human world for long. I'm not sure what he's planning but I'm not really happy about it. I sent him a glare from where I was sitting. "Brandan, you can sit behind Ashley." He walked to his seat, I ignored him and turned to see what Miranda wanted to ask me. "Do you have a picture of him." "Yes!"  I pulled out my phone, found the phote, showed it to her, she was melting like an ice cream. "Hey cheerleaders! What are ya'll talk about?" We three looked at each other then back at him... "About the game and football captain." All of a sudden, James walked in. "The other class said that this is my new class, Mr. Leans." "YEs, you are in my class. You can sit across from Ashley."   Author's Note   I had a diagram of the seatig chart looked like in my paper copy but I'm not sure that I can show it  on here. Sorry about that, I was wanting to show ya'll but can't.   "Okay." He walked ot his seat, he looked my way, I couldnt help but stare back at him. "Hey sweety!" "Hey babe!" I then heard that Miranda had to put her two cent in about us. "You two make such a cute couple!" James looked at who was now sitting behind me, he sent me a look showig me that he was confused on who that was. "Who's that girls?" "New guy, Brandan." "Okay."   After class...James and I, we walked out holding hands. It has been all classes now, it's lunch time now. It's also our last class period for the day since the game is later on. Locker Meeting  James left my locker a few minutes later...Brandan walked up. "Hey Ashley!" I turned aorund to see Brandan standing there, I wasn't sure what he wanted by I knew that I would find out. "BRANDAN, why are you here?" "I came to see my girl." I looked away from him, I can't believe he said that so naturally. It's still hard for him to understand that I'm not he's kind anymore and that we couldn't even date, even if we wanted to. "I told you already, we can't date now. Why can't you understand that." He looked away from my line of vision, he then looked back, he was looking at what I was wearing instead. "Your a cheerleader now? I looked at him,  are you seriously asking met hat question. "Yeah I am...well bye Brandan." I turned away from him and walked off. I didn't want to know what else he has to say.   I shut my locker door and walked off.   Author's Note   Sorry that this chapter was a little short, it was suppose to me a short meeting between the two and that Brandan finds out that she has become a cheerleader now. I'm still sorry that it wasn't as long as the rest of the chapters.   Enjoy! :) The Big Game  School was over now...I was at my locker in my cheer uniform, I was putting on some sparkly make-up for the game. I also was waiting for James to come walk with me to the game. I heard foot steps coming down the hallway, I knew that it was James. He came up behind me, wrapped his arms around me, he grabbed my hand and we head to the football field.    When we got to the field, he had to get changed for the game. Before he went, I kissed him on the cheek for good luck. Brandan of all people, he was in the crowd. I figured that he only came so he could watch e instead.   The game has started!    It was the last quarter now, it was three more points to win! James called a time out, for some reason, he asked the refear for 10-15 minute time out. We were saying our cheer to incourage the team more. James came over to me. "Where about to loose this game. Where toast!" I could see the sadness in how he said that, I wasn't sure what I could say to help cheer him up about it. "Don't say that James. Will this help?" He looked at me like,  what are you saying will help?  I leaned toward him, kissed him square the lips. He moved back to see what he would say. "Thanks babe! That helped A LOT!!" "Your welcome!! Now go win this game, sweety!" "Okay, let's do this."   He ran back onto the field, they hudled up, they made a plan. The game was about to be over in 15 seconds. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1...TOUCH DOWN!! Our team won the game. Everyone ran onto the feild. I ran into Jame's arms, he kissed me. We all cheered, the team won the game!   Brandan, I guess, he started dating a cheerleader. Apprently the cheerleader fell for his lie of a story but she will learn what that means now. The Awesome-ist Day Ever!!  The next day...the princeapal said we could have a free day since our team won the game.   All the cheerleaders went and put their cheer uniforms on anyway since we are suppose to wear them the next day, that is if we win that night.    I was at my locker putting on make-up when James came up behind me. He leaned agaisnt the locker next to mine, he put his arm around my wasit, the best he could. We started talking, laughing and looking happy together, it was just another normal day for us.    Brandan was coming down the hall that we were on. He remembered that this is how he would do me but then noticed that James was there, he was kissing me for a very long time. He would stop, talk about about us, how happy I was making him.    "Can I interupt for a second, you two love birds?" I looked to see Miranda standing there, I wasn't sure what she wanted but turned my attention towards her. "Yeah, what is it Miranda?" "The team annd cheerleaders are meeting together, they are planning a pool party." I could tell that he didn't want to go and stop our fun, we decieded that it was best that we show up and see what everyone is planning. "We will be there in a second." "Okay, see you two." She turned away after she smiled in James direction. He just looked after her, he turned his head to see my glaring at him. He wrapped his arm around my waist, he showed me that there is noting to be worried about. He shut my locker, we followed after her.   When we got there, I noticed that the cheerleaders still have there uniforms on. Good thing I kept mine, too! We all started to talk about the party, where it should be and what time it should be also. I decide it was best to hold it at my "new" house. I don't think I have invited anyone over since the whole gicing up my powers situatuion. "It can be at my house! I live alone, I bought the house myself so we can do it there, if you would like to." They all agreed that it should be at my house. It apprently is tonight, so I must have a lot of decorating to do before the party. Parking Lot Talk  In the parking lot...James and I were talking before we had to part ways for a little while. "I can't wait for you to see my new two piece swim suit I got!" "I can't wait any longer now, babe. I guess I will see you at your house then?" "Yes you will!." I kisssed him goodbye, he got in his car an drove away.   Author's Note   Sorry that this one isn't very long either. I don't like whent here short but I hope that you are loving the book so far, though. Please comment, live or favorite book. I'll be glad that you did. I hope your enjoying!   Enjoy even more! :)   P.S. Don't be afraid to send me a message, I'm always looking for new people to chat. I will be waiting for your message. Setting Up I was setting up when I heard my cell ring.  "Hey girl!" "Can I bring a freind to the party tonight?" I started to think that she was wondering if she could bring someone that wasn't from our class or something but decided not to ask about the person. "Sure you can." "Thanks! I'll be there in ten minutes!" I rung up the phone, I went back to finishing up the last bit of decorating I had to do before people started to show up.   Author's Note   Again, I'm sorry about the short chapter. It's the way I raft drafted it, I'm so sorry guys.Please continue reading.   Enjoy :) The Pool Party 2  Everyone was here now...the one person that I didn't show up was James yet. I started to wonder where he could be or if he even really wanted to show up... Publication Date: October 14th 2015 https://www.bookrix.com/-jn1da8820901355
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-melody-dupree-anquan-039-s-story/
melody dupree Anquan's Story chapter one  As I walked up the stairs to my bedroom I had a sinking feeling in my stomach. Normally the first person to greet me when I get home from school is my three year old brother, but he was nowhere to be found. Suddenly the front door opened and my dad shoved a teenage boy with braids into the house while holding him by his hair. The boy fell forward with a cry of pain and I suddenly realized who the boy was. "Anquan," I cried running back down the stairs. I threw myself at my father quietly pushing him back and into the kitchen, where I handed him an ice cold beer straight from the icebox. "Talk to me and tell me what happened daddy," I whispered loud enough for him to hear me when I said it. "That boy is now your personal slave. Do you understand me? Don't ever set him free either. Your little brother is dead by the hand of that boy's father. He will never be allowed to have his freedom. If he suddenly has a kid he is not allowed to see it. Do you understand me," my dad said looking me dead in the eye. "Yes daddy, I understand," I said giving Anquan a sad pitying look as I stood up. "I want you to go get your bags and bring them to my room," I ordered Anquan, who looked up at me and mouthed 'No' before looking back down at his lap. I reached out to smack him but my father beat me to it. He grabbed him by the hair and yanked him up on his feet. Suddenly Anquan let out a high pitched scream and started to cry, just as I realized my dad had struck him with the belt and that Anquan was shirtless. "Master please stop it. It hurts, please I'm begging you to stop," he cried as my father continued to belt him. "Now my daughter is going to repeat what she said. Tell her no again and you'll get it worse than you just got it," my dad said shoving him to the ground and making sure to let go of his hair at the last second. Anquan hit the ground with a thud and let out another cry of pain as he landed on his wrist and I heard an audible crack as his wrist broke. Fresh tears streamed down his face and I gently helped him up. "Let's get you to the hospital," I said and led him out to my car. When I got there, I gently helped him out of the car and walked him into the emergency room. Quickly I filled out the paperwork, paid up front with cash and immediately got his hand wrapped in a cast. When I got home I noticed Anquan hadn't said a word since we had gotten back in the car to come home. "What's wrong Anquan, you've been oddly quiet since we left the hospital. I know your new position must be hard for you, but the good news is with my brother in the backseat asleep your workload is lessened. And that is because I say it is and the fact that I'm in charge of you. So when we get back to the house you are to make a soup. I had laid out the ingredients to make it myself but as you are now my slave you have to make it," I said pulling into my dad's driveway. My dad was sitting on the trunk of his car and I slowly walked around my car to the passenger side of my car and gently shook my little brother awake. "Mel," he said looking up at me with a smile on his face. "Daddy's home baby," I said and picked him up leaving Anquan to close the car doors. chapter two When I had called my dad from the hospital he had been ecstatic and demanding for me to come home with my brother. My father zeroed in on the little boy in my arms as I set my brother down so he could run over to our father. He immediately latched onto my leg and refused to let go no matter how much I tried to pry him off of me. I looked behind me and saw why Anquan was scowling down at my brother with an angry expression on his face that I knew was because he had become a slave to my family over my brother. "Michael go to daddy because I have something to take care of. Okay baby," I whispered as his hold loosened on my leg. He nodded and ran over to our father, who picked him up to see if he was okay. After being satisfied that he was okay my dad went inside with my brother leaving me to deal with Anquan. "Inside," I ordered pointing to the outhouse next to the main plantation building which was the manor. He opened the door and jumped back with a yelp of surprise. I grabbed him by his hair and dragged him inside the small building. "You see that rope on that wall Anquan," I snarled in his ear and then threw him to the ground. I grabbed the horsewhip that was hanging on the wall and immediately slashed it across his back over thirty times causing his back to split open and bleed as he screamed with each hit I landed on him. “Give my brother another dirty look. I dare you and I will string that rope into a noose and you will simply disappear on this plantation. Just like so many others before you. Do you understand me,” I snarled in his ear and he whimpered something that didn’t go unnoticed by me. "Yes master I understand," he whispered and I quickly cleaned his back and sent him to make dinner for my family. I put the horsewhip back and looked down at the ground and noticed a red circle on the dirt that had been undisturbed for over a hundred years. I quickly got a shovel and started to dig right there on that spot and unearthed a trunk with a lock so rusted it crumbled to dust the moment I touched it. I threw back the lid and let out a shriek that had both Anquan and my father running to see if I was okay. There in the trunk lay a young white girl no older than her early thirties in a white colonial dress that was blood stained all down the front. I could tell that she had been there for a while because she was mummified in perfect condition. Except for the fact that she was dead we could have been twins. My dad stood there his mouth gaping and stared at the body in the trunk. Anquan hit the deck beside me and I stared down at him in shock before grabbing the horsewhip and cracking it against the ground causing him to jerk awake with a whimper. “Dad are there any rumors surrounding Melissa Johnson’s disappearance all those years ago,” I asked and he nodded before looking at me. “There are two rumors that surround her disappearance. One was that her husband had murdered her or had one of the slave boys do it and then he fled to the north after hiding the body. People in our family have searched for her body for generations and came up empty. The other rumor was that her spirit haunts this outhouse every night at midnight because this was the last place her slaves had seen her alive just before she disappeared on that very same day. So sweetheart since I know you’re an adventurer I will let you stake out this outhouse tonight and I want you to tell me what you see in the morning okay,” my dad whispered pulling me in for a hug. I nodded and hugged him back and said, “I will let you know what I see. I love you daddy,” and with that my dad went back inside leaving me with the body and a sniveling slave at my feet. “Anquan would you like to stay with me out here because I’m sure you wouldn’t want any harm to come to your new master now would you,” I asked and he shook his head. “I will stay out here with you to ensure no harm comes to you master,” Anquan said and I closed the trunk and sat down on the ground to wait. That night was going to be very interesting for me and my new slave. chapter three  It was nearing midnight by the light of Anquan’s watch and the ghost girl had yet to make an appearance. Just as the clock struck midnight a low moan came from the trunk and a white figure in a colonial dress rose up out of the trunk and I started to shake in fear. “Who dares to disturb my home and my place of rest,” the ghost screamed and then she noticed me huddled in a corner pressed against Anquan who was fast asleep with his arms wrapped around my stomach. I was situated as far away from the trunk as possible staring at the trunk with a terrified look on my face as if it had just turned into a monster that was about to eat me. I looked away with a scream as I remembered what I had found earlier that day waking Anquan up causing him to pull me closer when he saw the apparition that was in front of us. “Who are you and what do you want,” Anquan asked his voice shaking as he spoke. I turned my face and buried it in his chest as the tears began to stream down my face. “Why is there so much injustice done to the women in my family. Every woman in over thirty generations has disappeared after bearing children to their husbands. Is this the fate that awaits me,” I sobbed into Anquan’s shirt as he rubbed my back. “No, I won’t let that happen to you,” Anquan whispered and I started to shake in terror as I felt the ghost move closer to us. I looked up at Anquan’s face and noticed that he was paler than normal so I reached for the blanket hanging on the wall and pulled it down with one swift pull. I wrapped it around us and looked up at the ghost who actually looked like the body in the trunk which looked like me. “I heard the boy passed out earlier when he saw my body in the trunk. Let me guess young lady you were the one who screamed and found it,” the girl said changing until it looked like she was alive except for the fact that her white dress was covered in blood. “Yes I was the one who found you,” I said and I felt Anquan go limp against me as he passed out again. “Stupid weak slave,” I muttered smacking my hand against his bare chest barely getting a twitch out of him. I got up and threw the blanket around my shoulders before walking over to another corner and sitting down. I looked up at the ghost and a sudden thought came to me so I asked it. “If we bury you in the family cemetery will you leave the property and move on like all spirits should,” I asked and the ghost nodded. “Of course I would but nobody had found my body until now. Once I am given a proper burial next to my husband, who returned before he died and had our children bury him in the cemetery on the property, I will move on and rest in peace,” she said and I nodded. “You will be buried tomorrow and finally have the rest that you deserve Melissa,” I whispered and she nodded gratefully. “I will go now please don’t hurt him. He’s just in shock my darling daughter,” the ghost said and left as she moved on in the hopes that I would keep my promise. chapter four I watched as they place the coffin containing Melissa Johnson’s body in the ground next to the well-worn grave of Anthony Boldin and I looked up at the outhouse to see an image looking out at the small ceremony in the family cemetery on the property. As I waved the image smiled at me and slowly disappeared and I knew she wouldn’t be coming back to haunt us anymore. I turned back to the coffin and I smiled as I realized my mother would be the last girl in my family to disappear now that the curse was broken. Anquan stood behind me with an umbrella held over my head as it started to rain. I pulled my jacket tighter and zipped it up to my chin as Anquan lowered the umbrella to my height as my father turned and glared at him. “He’s fine daddy,” I whispered as my father opened his mouth to speak and belittle the good job Anquan was doing because he managed to cover both me and my brother and neither of us were getting wet. Anquan hung his head and stared at the ground knowing he would be punished for receiving my help just then no matter what I did to try and protect him. Once the coffin was covered with the pile of earth, I picked up my brother and walked towards the house with Anquan hurrying along behind me to keep us both from getting wet. I looked behind me with a smirk on my face and ran towards the house with Anquan struggling to keep up. I put my brother down and took his hand and together we ran in the house soaking wet. Anquan placed the umbrella in the holder and stood by the door with his head bowed and he only moved when my father came in the house and ordered him to close the door. “Why are both of my children dripping with water,”my father demanded rounding on Anquan once he noticed we were both soaking wet. Anquan immediately tensed waiting for the blow that he knew was to come and whispered, “I was trying to keep them from getting wet, master. But when I first caught up to get the umbrella over them your daughter sped up and started to run towards the house while I struggled to keep up.” My father reached out and grabbed Anquan by his hair and yanked him backwards as he snarled, “Don’t you ever blame any of your incompetence on my daughter or my son. Do you understand me boy?”  Anquan nodded and winced as that movement caused his hair to be pulled. I turned and picked up my brother and went upstairs to change out of the wet clothes my brother and I were in. As I went into my room with my brother in my arms I found a pair of jeans and a sweater already laid out with a note propped up on the pile in elegant handwriting. I picked up the note and read: I saw your plan before you could put it in action. I let him know so he could know to lay out clothes. All you have to do is call him to draw your bath. Sincerely, Melissa Johnson the first Original owner of this plantation. I smiled and called Anquan over the intercom that we had installed for me to check on my brother without having to go in his room and he immediately came in my room to see me in my robe and I politely asked him to draw my bath water. He went into the bathroom and turned on the water and plugged the drain. He turned to me and pointed to the bubble bath I had on the sink and I nodded my answer before he took it and poured it into the running water. Once the bath was full he turned off the water and checked the temperature before gesturing at me to get in the tub. I looked at him blankly and he closed and covered his eyes and I dropped my robe, stepped around him and climbed into the warm bath water as he turned around with his eyes still closed. “I’m all the way in the water so you can uncover your eyes,” I said and pointed to my brother who still needed to be undressed. Anquan nodded and walked over to my brother and pulled his shirt and wife beater off and then he gently laid him down and took off his pants and underwear before looking at me. “He always takes a bath with me,” I said and Anquan nodded before gently picking up my brother and placing him in the tub with me. Just as Anquan stepped away my dad came in the room to check on me but did not expect to see my slave in the bathroom with me. “What the hell do you think you’re doing,” my dad shouted and Anquan fell to the floor in a dead faint.  “He was putting Michael in the tub with me and then I was going to send him away,” I explained as I got up and grabbed my towel from the rack and wrapped it around me. I yanked Anquan up off of the floor and dragged him into my bedroom where I mercilessly dumped him on the floor. I went back in my bathroom and picked Michael up and climbed back in the bathtub and proceeded to scrub my brother down until he said to stop. After words I washed and conditioned his hair and got out of the tub and we dried off. I went into my bedroom to find Anquan standing by the bed looking at the floor and crying unashamedly.   Publication Date: June 3rd 2014 https://www.bookrix.com/-bellacullen830
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-jasmine-chang-teenage-dirt-bag-baby/
jasmine chang Teenage Dirt Bag Baby To my fans ;) Chapter one Fuck.. I took a drag of smoke and blew it out the ashes falling down turning cold from the cigarette. I sat on the rail road tracks minding my own self. The sun was beating on me making small drips of sweat drip down my forehead. I was just nothing but a teenage dirt bag always looking for trouble. I’m not normal at all really I mean nobody is...Were all just lost souls looking for perfection. But I’m not. I give perfection my middle finger. I’m just a teenage dirt bag doing whatever I want with whoever I want. I blew one more drag of smoke and flick my cigarette off to the side. I close my eyes and took deep breaths enjoying this day. I open my brown eyes and got up I started walking down from the rail road tracks. The rocks started to rumble as the train started coming by I sighed and went down to the rode where car went by day and night. I turn my head a bit and saw a payphone and a gas station. I started walking to the gas station. The sun got block by clouds just passing through.    I walk in the gas station a cod breeze hit me making me sigh in pleasure want over and grab some snacks and a coke. I went up to the counter and a guy was reading a magazine. I clear my throat the guy’s eyes look over the magazine and set it down. "What?" he said in a rude tone. I laugh in amazement and smirk "is this how you treat people?" I said and blink my eye lashes innocently with a smile. He rolled his eyes and started to scan my items "that would be 12.36" I frown "but I don’t have that kind of money" he laughed "well maybe that’s because you spend it on drugs Missy" I fingers lightly grab his collar and I look in his blue eyes and lean to his ear and whisper "I’ll give you an little treat if you give me this for free" I pulled back and wink the guy smirk "alright" he said and got up and started to lead me to the bathroom. I mentally rolled my eyes at his studiedly I stop him before he went in I started to kiss his neck leaving my red lipstick on his neck. My hands grab his wallet and keys without noticing I pulled back and giggle cutely He smirk and walk in the bathroom first. Before I walk in I smirk and shut the door. The guy bang on it and yelled cured word threw the door out they came out muffled.   I lock the door with a key and laughed "cya pervert!" I put my sunglasses and unlock the register and got all the cash. I shoved the cash in my pockets and bra. I grab the food and my drink I took a sip out of the coke leaving a red lip stick smudge on it. I left and the door rang its bell as I went out. I saw the guy’s car and smile I grab the keys and fit each one until one unlocks the door. I started the car and drove off I turn on the radio and blast it I stop at the red light and waited. I stared to lip the words to the song and tap my hands on the staring wheel enjoy the moment. Before the light turn green I took another cigarette I put it in my mouth and grab my lighter the flame turn on lighting the cigarette smoke filled my lungs killing me slowly but I didn’t give an shit. It’s my life nobody else we all die in the end with a caused it’s the circled of life. The light turn green and push my foot on the petal and drove. I didn’t know where I was going but I really don’t care it’s not my car.   I let one hand on the wheel while the other took the cigarette out of my mouth while my lips blew out the smoke. I grab out my phone and dialed and number I push the phone up to my ear hearing it ring. I groggy voice picks it up “hello?” “hey Brandon it’s me” The line was silent then a voice boom in the background Brandon yelled back at the voice they died down and Brandon spoke up again “you still there Bow?” “Always am” I sighed “want to hang out?” “Sure” I shrug “I’ll pick you up” “naw I got a car” He laughed “whose car did you steel now?” I smirk then fake gasp “me steel?! No never!” He laughed “alright pick me up at my house we could go to zack party” I swallow down my nerves and laughed nervously “y-yea totally!” I said “k see yea soon” “bye” “bye Bow” He hung up I drop my phone and cursed at myself…all I’m going to say is that me and zack hate each other so fucking much and every time we see each other its war world three……  Publication Date: July 23rd 2013 https://www.bookrix.com/-minght.girl.fangs
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-alexia-marshall-hot-or-not-list/
Alexia Marshall Hot or Not List Every girl and boy: You are beautiful. Let nobody say that you aren't. Introduction 6th Grade Prettiest Girl: JaneCarter "JC" Smith  Mixing athleticness and prettiest! BTW cutest nickname!   Ugliest Girl: Bonnie Rockfeller  I guess you didn't get your share of the "good" genes! Cutest Boy: James Cohen  Another line of cute Cohen's coming up! Ugliest Boy: Gordon Clark  Jerk, nerd, and now ugly! Congrats.   7th Grade Prettiest Girl: Emily Cross   Three words. HOT HOT HOT! Ugliest Girl: Bailey McEvans  Being mean doesn't mean your pretty. Cutest Boy: Chase Henderson Two times in a row! Ugliest Boy: Jimmy Chandler  Try combing your hair once in a while. There is also a thing called a shower.   8th Grade Prettiest Girl: Lauryn Tran Get a new boyfriend, Queen of Riverwood! Ugliest Girl Kimberly Carter  Weight Watchers is waiting for you! Cutest Boy: Josh Rockfeller  All hail King of Riverwood! Ugliest Boy: Drew Thompson  You're girlfriend needs higher standards.    Chapter One Tuesday   JC   As I walked into school, with Bonnie, an older girl ran past us, crying. We watched her run down the hall holding on to a light blue envelope. “Drama queen,” Bonnie whispered. I nodded back silently in agreement as we headed to our lockers.                “I like how you did you hair today,” Bonnie said, smiling.                “Yeah, I’m trying something new,” I replied.                I wore my hair in a messy bun with a sweater, sweatpants and UGGS. I looked at what Bonnie wore. Her hair was down and she was wearing a turtleneck under her V-neck sweater. She wore jeans and sneakers. Defiantly making a fashion statement. I waved goodbye as we separated to go to our lockers.                As I put my stuff away in my locker, a blue envelope laid at the bottom of my locker. Just like the one that girl had. I gently picked it up and was about to open it when Bonnie came running in my direction, clutching on to her things, but also holding the same blue envelope. “You got one too?” I asked.                “Yeah. I wonder what it is,” Bonnie said.                “Well lets open them.”                I tired opening my envelope, but I struggled and ripped bits of it. I looked at Bonnie embarrassed. She had opened her envelope perfectly fine. “You’re so perfect,” I said laughing as I gestured her envelope then mine.                “No….I’m not. Especially to the people who wrote this,” Bonnie said showing the piece of paper.                Prettiest girl: JaneCarter “JC” Smith Mixing athletic and prettiest! BTW cutest nickname!                Bonnie Rockfeller: I guess you didn’t get your share of the “good genes!”                “ Bonnie! What is that?!” I tore open my envelope seeing that I had the exact same paper. When I looked up, Bonnie was staring in my mirror.                “Bonnie, you’re not ugly.”                “No, JC. You’re not ugly. I am.”                “Shut up! That’s not true! Whoever wrote this is probably jealous and has no life!”                Bonnie shook her head. “I know what this is. My brother told me about this. Some unknown person writes a list of the prettiest, ugliest, and the cutest boys and girls. They do it for each grade, then everybody in the whole school gets one and the teachers don’t care.”                I let that sink in. Being an only child, I didn’t have brother or sister to tell me this. “But what doesn’t mean when it said you didn’t get your share of the good genes?” I asked.                “Look on your paper. Eighth grade. Cutest boy,” Bonnie replied.                I followed her directions and there her older brother’s name in the cutest boy section. “Bonnie! It doesn’t matter what this stupid paper says I’ll find out who wrote this for you.” “Why would you care? You were named the prettiest girl in sixth grade!” Bonnie said, as she began to walk away. When she was halfway down the hall she turned around and said, “By the way, congrats.” Then she turned the corner.                I didn’t know what to do. Bonnie wasn’t ugly and that was a fact. Sure she needed a little more fashion sense but it didn’t matter. The bell suddenly began to ring. I was late for class again.                                                 Chapter Two Emily I sat in class doodling, while Mr. Osborne went on about some science topic. I couldn’t focus after being named the prettiest girl in seventh grade. I obviously didn’t deserve it. There were so many other girls prettier than me. Also, Bailey McEvans was named the ugliest, which I was happy about. She was a bich to me and she deserves it.                “Emily? How about you answer this one,” Mr. Osborne said.                “Umm…..”                “Chloroplast,” the girl next to me said.                “Uh chloroplast?” I said.                “Correct,” Mr. Osborne said giving me a satisfied look, as he continued with the lesson.                I turned my head and gave the girl a smile. She smiled back and mouthed congrats. I tore my page of doodles and began taking notes until the rest of class.                Science finally ended with the bell ringing. I looked at my five pages of notes, feeling accomplished. I packed my things and headed to my friend'’ locker so we could walk to our next class together.  “Emily? A little help?” my friend asked, as I approached her locker.                I rolled my eyes as I put in her combination. “Oh Kenz, will you ever learn?” I said in a jokingly manner.                “Thanks! Well, you know me! The dumb blonde!” McKenzie said as she got her binders out.                “You’re not dumb! Also, will you please decorate my locker? Yours is so perfect!” I begged McKenzie.                “Sure. I’m going to ‘Mckenzify’ your locker!” she said smiling.                “Hey look who it is! The prettiest girl in seventh grade!”                I turned around, immediately regretting I did.                “What do you want Bailey?” I asked.                “We’re just here to congratulate you, right girls?” she said asking her little posse of girls. “I mean after all you are pretty lucky to be the prettiest girl. With looks like those, I’m pretty sure a blind person wrote this year’s Hot or Not list. ” Bailey added snickering.                You’re just jealous,” McKenzie said, closing her locker.                “And your just dumb,” Bailey said right back.                “Need to feel better about yourself do we?” I asked.                Bailey scowled at me. “All I’m saying is that you should be grateful.” With that she walked away with her posse.                I sighed rolling my eyes. “She’s such an asshole,” I muttered.                “Yeah,” McKenzie agreed as we walked off to our next class.                                     Chapter Three Gordon So far today I counted 30 odd stares directed at me. Just because a stupid piece of paper says I’m ugly, doesn’t mean I actually am. Plus it’s the brains that count. I glanced at two girl whispering to each other and looking at me. I couldn’t take it anymore. I walked up to them and began to yell right in there faces. “WHY DON”T YOU TAKE YOUR GOSSIP SOMEWHERE ELSE?! HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE CALLED THE UGLIEST? HUH? SO YOU CAN STOP WHISPERING ABOUT ME AND TALK ABOUT YOUR OWN DAM LIFE?!"                Feeling satisfied, I walked away and heard one of the girls mutter, “Uh rude!”                I would go back and yell at them again but I didn’t want to be late for English. As I walked into the English room, I remembered that today I got to share my presentation about the book I was reading. I first waited for another boy to go. When the teacher, Miss Johnson asked for comments about the boy’s presentation I raised my hand. “Gordon, do you have some compliments about Charlie’s presentation?” Miss Johnson asked.                “More like advice. I thought the presentation was poor and lacked details and facts. It had creativity which was good. Also, too many personal connections. Nobody cares about that. All they care about are the facts.”                “Gordon, I was looking for positive feedback. Not negative. I think you should apologize to Charlie and say something nice about his presentation,” Miss Johnson said.                “But wouldn’t that be lying Miss Johnson? If I said sorry when I’m actually not?” I asked Miss Johnson innocently.                “Never mind Gordon. Charlie you may sit down. I think it was a lovely presentation. Gordon you’re next.”                As I walked up towards the front of the class, I heard someone whisper, “Jerk.” I rolled my eyes and began my presentation. After 25 minutes, Miss Johnson stopped me. “Gordon, could you begin wrapping your presentation up please? We are running short on time.”                “Yes ma’am. There is still so much you need to know though!” I said.                Miss Johnson gave me her serious look and I finished my presentation. The bell rang and everyone ran out of the class room. I took my time and Miss Johnson approached me. "Gordon? I didn't appreciate your behavior today. You were very rude to your peers and me." "I'm sorry ma'am. I don't what got into me." I replied trying to seem innncoent. "I know your classmates might not be as smart as you are, but please try to be respectful. Here's a pass to your next class," Miss Johnson said handing me a bright blue sticky note.  I smiled and took the pass. She was right. I am smarter than the other students and it doesn't matter if I'm uglier.                                     Chapter Four Kimberly   Weight watchers is waiting for you?  Text: Alexia Editing: Alexia All rights reserved. Publication Date: March 16th 2016 https://www.bookrix.com/-cxedfdee65e2825
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-me-lt-3-sweet-can-go-bad/
Me&lt;3 Sweet can go Bad .... Chapter 1: Miss Too good BEEP,BEEP,BEEP.I sat up on my bed and rubbed my eyes. " school again" i sighed, walking to my closet and picking out my regular,the things i picked out was an outfit, it was a white shirt that hugged my body and and black short skirt,with a black tie on it, this was my school uniform,to me it's slut-like for the principle to pick out such a short skirt,i mean he was a pervert anyway.I walked to my bathroom striping the clothes off me and hoping into to the shower, the hot water ran on me for about 5mins. i walked out the shower blow-drying my hair, flat ironing, and putting my fave black bow on with regular earrings, i am not the type of girl to put on make-up but i prefer putting on a small shade of lip gloss. i then walked to my room putting on my uniform and my black converse shoes grabbing my white book bag. i looked at the time noticing i was gonna be late for the 1st day of school, yes we just finished summer break yesterday and im so sad. i got my car keys,bread and ran out the door my car wasn't one of those rich people cars i just had a regular Nissan. Oh i forgot to tell you about myself, my name is Kayleigh Toshiba i am first rank in my class as smartest and coolest but at the same time im the most sweet,caring, etc people always call me "Miss Too Good or miss too goodie" yea some of them don't really have good grammar.I live with my annoying brother, he is ranked 3rd in class for the girls but for boys he's ranked first, for me on boys i am ranked 2Nd under the school slut -shiver-. I and him are too different people the only thing that might give you a clue that were related is the eyes, my hair is dark brown and i have dark green eyes that you could get lost in, same goes for my brother except he has black hair and blue highlights, all girls find that " hot" as they say, my best friend is head over heals in-love with him but im not so sure about him. i walked to class picking the seat in the back which was next to a guy, i felt a attraction to him somehow, maybe its his cologne that he's wearing it had this sweet amazing smell to it that the whole time class started i couldn't stop smelling, i thought but something in me started howling, at first i was freaking out "am i paranoid!!?" i kept asking myself " no its just that that dude next to you, god hes hot!" " who are you!?" i ask the person in me, " i'm your inner wolf, in other words how i act is what you want to be but never had the guts to do, oh!oh! and please please give me a pretty name! i really really really want a pretty one, how about day star, or um cloud or or-" " please shut up!, im not really understanding but i believe that your my inner wolf and I'm gonna name you hyper how about that?" " your such a meanie" she started whimpering. " ugh, okay fine, how about starlite?" oh! thats so pretty! yes!" starlit said sounding so hapy which made me smile, causing the guy next to me look, we stared at each other for a long time until i started blushing and looking away, he smirked. " What are you smirking about!?" i literary yelled at him in the middle of class, it was so embarrassing half the class was starring at me and some of them started giggling and laughing, this is the reason why i don't have alot of friends that are girls cause i hate when they do such girly stuff. "aha,well what do you expect YOU where the one staring at me ya know. " he said smirking like a mad old man."i was not!" i said blushing a bright red and turning the other way, once again he was smirking, ugh! whats this dudes problem i want to slap the silly smirk right off his face!. " ah! now don't get carried away kayleigh." starlit said sounding so worried for me. i sighed, " just shut up for a while starlit" i said, she started whimpering.Then i felt a tap on my shoulder, it was the guy i was sitting next to. " Mind telling me your name sweet angel? i'd like to know you better since where mates and all" he said smirking, I was so shocked by this what!? me!? Mates!? with this with this amazon!? "your.....joking.." i said between laughs thinking this was a hilarious joke. " uh, im not joking but if you insist on playing it the hard way then i'll go first, my names Darren" he said showing a really sweet smile that could knock any girl down. " u-um i-i my name is-" " Miss Kayleigh and Mr Darren im supposing you want dentition on a wonderful day of school like this!?" " No Mam" i said putting my head down." "i don't really give a dam" Darren said i think that was his name, i can't believe a good girl like me has a mate that's so stubborn and thinks he's so cool. What am i gonna do!?? Meeting my stubborn yet loving mate Right after a Large argument with the teacher and Darren the bell rang and i went straight to my locker, before i could get there i felt these massive hands go around my waist, i knew there wouldn't be anyone stupid enough to do that since i knew karate, taking his hand i swinging it around landing him on his back in front of me."Ow..." he said "oh gosh! im so sorry! those were my instincts" i said i was really sorry i felt bad i mean i just met the guy and i'm already beating him up. " aha, its okay i forgive you only because your my mate" he said winking at me while getting up, it seems hes just fully recovered in seconds o.o." Mind telling me your name now beautiful?" he said " u-um i-i it's Kayleigh, b-but you c-can call me Kay" " aha, beautiful name you have Kay.. i'll get use to that" he said ,I suddenly blushed a light red, "What is he doing to me!??" i yelled in my head " aha what? AI'm doing thing" he said with a smile i couldn't get my eyes off. "H-how did u read my mind!??" "Oh, well Mates can read each other's minds" I stared blankly at him with my mouth open thinking What a horrible day this was, but at the same moment i was a little happy."It's the end of the day lemme drop you off" he said showing that flashing smile you could NEVER resit. "I guess so.." i started walking behind him like a little duckling, when i saw his car I was shocked. A turquoise colored Lamborghini, By the way my Favorited color is turquoise. My eyes where dazzling when i opened the door to find Dark color purple seats that had this soft feeling to it, but what i really hated was the scent of another girl..i felt like crying and He saw my eyes starting to get watery. "OH.. uh don't worry the scent is my younger brothers... uh girlfriend" When he said those words, i felt that the water from my eyes shot right back up into my eyeballs, i glanced at him and a smile rose from my face "WHAT THE HECK? WHY AM I SMILING WHY SHOULD I CARE IF HE GOT SOME OTHER GIRLS UGH!" " Ha ha, because you love me right?" at that moment i was stiff, it was quiet for a while until i wen to to sit down in the soft dark purple seats, buckling my seat belt like a robot. " Sorry, that question was a little weird, guess your not ready yet then" At first i noticed we weren't going to my house, Darren pulled up at a Large Orange house. "Mother of god...THIS HOUSE!!" i Yelled out noticing i yelled and covered my mouth afterwards, He laughed so natural and cute, i't took my breath away."Wait! why are we here? i thought you said you'd drop me off?" "Well i didn't say Your house" He smirked. I sighed and got out the car eager to see the inside of this majestic house. I ran like a little girl to the front and waited for Darren to hurry up, he was walking at a regular pace, which made me somehow feel to jump into those comfy looking arms. I watched as his hand slowly rang to doorbell. BONG BONG BONG was all i heard before a handsome guy with dirty blonde hair and and deep blue eyes. "Well hello gorgeous" The handsome guy said adding a wink. I blushed a small light red and turned to a angry looking Darren. "Back off Clonen she's my mate" He said, but i didn't pay attention to that i was looking at his black eyes. The guy that was sappose to be named Clonen was now looking shocked and both terrified. "You finally found her!? after 10 years??" Now i was shocked 10 years?? oh gosh.. i guess i should give him a chance i mean he's not bad. From the look of that i could see that Darren's eyes went back to normal and he was now smiling, there was only one reason... he read my mind. New House,New rules... Wait im MOVING? My eyes where now dazzling the reason was because I saw what was behind the guy named Clonen, inside was even more BIG! I blushed a hard red as Darren took my hand and pushed Clonen out of the way to lead me to a couch..was it a couch? looked more like a bed! i saw a kid about 3 years younger than me walk by with headphones in. I glanced at him and Darren as he passed by, Darren seem to notice and gave me a introduction, "Oh Kay, this is My little brother Sam i told you about" they looked so much alike it was hard to believe Both had Dark brown hair and deep Turquoise eyes, the only difference is his little brothers was more curly,Sam waved at me and went upstairs nodding to his music.At the moment i felt so free and easy, so i layed my head on Darren's lap pushing my back against his abs, inhaling his scent, it smelled like green mint leaves, That was now my favorite smell. -Darren- I was just enjoying the show until i felt Kay lay down on me pushing against my abs, smiling I and inhaled her rose- like scent that drove me crazy. " Darren!" One of my pack member's came in,But of course they where angry because they thought i brought home another slut. " you Idiot stop getting so pissed, This is my mate" I said with a tone showing like i was a whiny brat. His eyes softened and came to meet with my mates eyes, i growled at the thought of them doing anything, but then remembered she said she would give me a try."oh, I Apologize for that small fuss I just made.." There eyes seem to be connecting now. " u-uh don't worry about it " Jerna replied.The sight of my beautiful mate getting connected with another wolf just sett me off guard. I growled loudly at Steve. He was a low pack member, and I had forgotten to introduce him.The growl had seem to have enough effect on him to back off because his gaze went quickly came of Jerna. " U-uh I'll be taking my leave then." "wait.. uh Jerna this is Steve I forgot to introduce him, he's always busy with pack business.""It's a pleasure to meet you...Jerna." " same here~" She said giving a small smile before going back into child mode and giggling at spongebob. " your really something aren't you?" I said smirking flicking her head. -Jerna- Steve seem to be a nice guy, I felt as if he we had some kind of a connection though, not a mate to mate kind of one though.. but something different. As I was entranced with my thinking I felt a small flick on my forehead from behind which made me flinch.I suddenly got up to be face straight at Danny. " mm Why'd you do that!?" I said rubbing one spot of my head.Danny smirked and let out a chuckle. " You are something" he said murmuring under his breath. " of course I'm something, a thing called a human being! or uh a wolf-human being!" I started pouting, but my lips where now greeted with a tender sweet mint taste that instantly drew me in. It was passionate at the same time loving.(A/n: tell me if you know wht this says RQ :D tcilfnoc) He licked my bottom lip allowing entrance ( TBC VERY SOON) Text: .... Images: ...... Editing: .....? Translation: .... All rights reserved. Publication Date: January 12th 2013 https://www.bookrix.com/-pokipanda19067
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-chance-c-barrett-a-story-of-sword-and-shield-book-one/
Chance c Barrett A Story Of Sword And Shield, Book one. A Story of Sword and shield. Chapter 1: Infiltration. I looked around as I ran weaving through the trees in the forest. “It’s too calm” I thought to myself yet I continued as if a force was pushing me to carry on… Suddenly, a razor sharp arrow flew by my head grazing me…. just enough to leave a small cut on the side of my head. My heart started to beat faster and faster, I quickly ran behind a small scraggly tree, it was broken down and not the best cover, but it would have to work. “How can I get out of here? Judging by that arrow it does not take them very long to find my position and attack.” I looked around for a moment and noticed that there was a guard not more than a few feet away quietly I jumped onto a tree branch, grabbing the archer that was posted in it, with only the sound of rustling leaves he was no longer on this earth. I looked around for a second then took the armor and weapon from the body. “Now, I just have to hope this fools them” I thought as I put the armor on, as I saw a few other archers’ approach I stood straight and said. “Um, hello..” i said anxious. Another archer stared at me for a moment. “You do know you were supposed to be at the territory line, right?” the archer answered. “Sorry, I am uh... new.” I said and tried to find an escape route. “Are you okay?” the archer asked. “Yes, fine...” I said as I reached for a case attached to my waist. The archer stared at me “hey, what are you doing?” he asked. “Nothing... except for this” I said as I quickly drew a dagger and swiftly killed him. I smiled “a job well done” I thought. “Almost dark… I should hurry back...” After about a mile of walking, I arrived at a small half decayed and hastily made shelter in between a few old trees; they were an amazing sight to show how anything through perseverance can withstand almost anything… I walked in and looked around then walked up to a figure wearing a black and red cloak that showed his bright red eyes and nothing more. I smiled “Rex, I see you made it back in one piece as well” Rex lowered the hood part of the cloak and smiled. “Yes, well unlike you I am not near as reckless…” He interrupted what I was about to say “well at least, I am smart about it when I am” I smiled “well I should go, it is getting late and I have not rested in days…” Rex smiled also and said “alright my son, rest up... for tomorrow is going to be important…” “I know, we will infiltrate them... by becoming them...” I said as I walked away, toward a small cot-like bed on the far side of the shelter. I laid down, I was tired... but the adrenaline from the fight a moment ago was still surging through my veins, and it demanded I not sleep, but I fought the urge and closed my eyes… slowly drifting into sleep. The next morning I awoke and stood quickly to attention, was there anyone else here? Did something happen while I was asleep? I looked around to check, then removed bandages that were around my right eye and examined the room further, as my right eye glowed a dull red… then I quickly put the bandages back on, hoping I did not let it see for too long… It seemed as if nothing was wrong at the moment, so I took a deep breath and left the shelter. The sunlight was bright, and blinded my good eye momentarily… luckily the other one was wrapped in its bandages. I walked down a short path that went toward a temple in distance, ah the famous golden wolf temple, known for, greed, order, and horrible leadership…”I just hope this plan works, the faster I get out of there the better…” I thought to myself as I approached the entrance to the huge temple. An entrance guard looked at me through what seemed to be about 100 lbs of armor, yet without a closed helmet, odd that they would wear that much armor and not protect the head well… The guards word snapped me back into reality “hey you! I need identification!” “I don’t have any, I just wish to enlist…” I replied. The guard laughed “YOU are going to enlist for the great golden wolf army? What makes you think that you have the skills necessary for such a position?” “given the soldiers I’ve seen of yours walking here, it does not seem that it is that hard to get a position here, furthermore I killed all of the guard I passed, I took each of their medals they were carrying for proof” I replied. The guard looked at me “well where are they then?” as if he did not believe that I could even kill one much less ten or more soldiers. I reached into a pocket in my cloak and pulled out the medals, and sure enough each of them had golden wolf insignias and names. “Right here.” I said as I showed the guard the medals. The guard looked at me, surprised. “Well that was just luck…but very well...proceed, and if you wish to enlist, talk to general grey” “Yes…. Sir” I said, adding the sir with a condescending tone. I walked inside the temple, it was much larger on the inside than I thought, it had a gold plating covering the walls, and the ceiling went up about 40 feet. with all the soldiers talking, playing instruments, cheering, laughing, and even some of them were dancing, it reminded me of a circus or maybe a carnival…I shook myself from the distraction I was in and continued to walk down the halls of the temple until reaching what I figured was the barracks, and so I walked inside… there were sets of armor hanging from the wall and weapons leaned by them, there were what seemed to be beds against the walls. i asked if anyone had seen this “general grey” sure enough one of the soldiers said that he was in the main hall with a group of other soldiers, so I made the long walk back through the halls and finally reached the main one, and then I wondered… how would I find someone in a crowd of over 300?. Well I looked and looked for about an hour or so and finally was about to give up when a tall soldier, bearing the golden wolf general insignias and armor stood up and walked away from a table, I quickly walked up to him and said “are you general grey?” The tall soldier looked at me and said “yes, I am general grey, what do you need?” “I would like to enlist in your army, and the guards told me to find you.” I said. “Well I could sign you up... and I am assuming they gave you a test?” the general said. “Yes... of sorts sir…” I replied. “I see... well how did you pass?” The general questioned. I took out the medals I had just shown the guards and handed them to the general. He stared at them for a moment and then said “I will go enlist you now…” I nodded and walked away, wondering if I had maybe done something that will come back in the future… but I shrugged the feeling off and explored the halls of the temple, after a few hours of walking, I grew tired, and fell asleep in a long hallway in the south end of the temple. “Hey you wake up.” An unknown voice said to me. I blinked a few times and stood up. “Who are you?...” I asked. “Who am I? I should be asking who are YOU, you don’t have any armor, any insignia of any kind...” a female soldier replied. “that is because I just enlisted… and my name is—“ I paused for a moment, I have been given so many names by the different groups I had been with that I did not know what to call myself any more… I decided I would just use the first one I was given… “My name is Blade…” I said. “Blade, huh? my name is Sophia, but here they call me shining star.” The female soldier smiled. “Nice to meet you”. “The same to you, star… well I should probably get moving, I do not want to be late for any assignments they may give me” I said as I walked away “Good luck!” The one I now knew as “star” said. Chapter 2: Rituals. “Today is when you truly become one of us” a soldier said holding a small knife. “And how is that?” I asked. “We put our insignia on you of course” the soldier replied, bringing the knife to my arm. I stared at the blade, it looked slightly dull, it had been used many times lately… The soldier slowly started to cut into my arm, carving a strange insignia into it; I winced as I held back the pain. The soldier stopped and pulled the blade away from my arm, the wound bleeding “that scar will represent the sacrifices you will have to make being one of us” he said. I quietly stood up and walked away holding the wound. I arrived in the main hall a few moments later. A tall slender male warrior walked into the middle of the main hall. “Attention everyone, today is an important day… today we honor the spirits, with blood.” The warriors in the hall cheered as I stood in the back of the crowd, wondering what this could mean. I walked down the corridor and had the insane notion that I was in danger somehow, but I quickly shrugged it off as I arrived at the front entrance the guards gave me a stare “You again? I guess you have permission to leave then, is that true?” the guard asked. “Yes, permission of general grey, I am to get my first assignment after I gather some things from the secondary temple outpost in the tall trees area.” I replied. “Very well, on your way then” the guard said, nudging me out the entrance with a long silver staff with a gold plated blade on the end of it. I walked for what seemed like a day, but in reality was only a mere hour when I saw the outpost. “There it is” I said to myself, walking up to it “Hello, may I see identification?” a soldier at the front of the outpost said. I showed the insignia on my arm, it had finally stopped bleeding and had now made a scab on my arm. “I see you are new?” the soldier asked. I nodded at him “yes, I just enlisted…” I replied. “Well then, you must be here to gather some materials here?” the soldier asked. “Yes, general grey sent me here.” I replied. “Go inside and look for a small door on the left, what you are looking for is in there.” The soldier said, knowing exactly what the general had sent me for. I walked into the outpost and to the very door the soldier has spoken of, as I opened it, I swore I could hear a voice telling me that I should not be here… that I should not have opened this door… I spotted a large crate “I guess these are the materials I was sent here for” I said to myself lifting the heavy crate. I walked out of the outpost and back toward the main temple; it would take me almost twice as long carrying...whatever this was…. I suddenly dropped the crate, my heart started to beat faster again, my vision was blurred, and my head felt as if it had been hit by a ten ton bolder. “What’s happening?!” I said as the pains got worse, and my heart beat even faster, and my vision got dark. A human-like shadow appeared in front of me, with a slightly worried look. “Hello…brother” the shadow said, in a slightly distorted voice. “Draco…is this your doing?” I asked. “No, i want to help you, but first you have to LET me help you” the shadow replied. “But…who is doing this then?... if it is not you…” I trailed off. “That is not important right now... you just have to remember…five-hundred and eighty-nine…” the shadow said. “But…” I trailed off, the pain still coursing through me. “Just…remember…. And also… it is the leader of those who are opposites of the ones you now are a part of… who carry the answers to your pain, to your past, and even your future” the shadow said, slowly fading into nothing. I stood up... the pain now gone... but I could not see….I could hear faint static in the distance. I wondered if I should investigate the sound further or not…. I walked toward the sound, as it grew louder I could feel the pain building up again… someone... or something... did not want me to follow this sound, but I continued none the less. I thought I had reached the source of the sound when all of a sudden I felt a sharp pain in the back of my neck, I tried to feel my neck to see what was wrong but instead I fell over onto the ground and passed out. I awoke and looked around “what happened?” “Where am I?” “Am I alive?” I asked myself. I tried to get to my feet, but found I had no strength left to move, it was as if I was held to the ground by a two ton weight. “Do not waste your strength” a strange voice said to me. “Who are you? Where am i? What happened?” I asked. “All in due time.” The voice replied. “I don’t have time for this!” I said, and forced myself to stand. “Now, do not get ahead of yourself” the voice said, sending what seemed like lightning strikes of darkness toward me. I did a quick duck roll to the side and threw a dagger at the stranger, aiming for his neck. “You will not win that easily……for you cannot kill what is already dead” the stranger said, fading. “I want answers!” I exclaimed, trying to grab the stranger but it was too late, he was gone. “Well it seems I will be finding my own answers at the moment…” I thought to myself. It was strange, one moment I could not see and I was hearing things, the next I am on the ground with barely any strength left listening to some stranger. But there was no time to worry about such things now I thought as I walked slowly toward a sparkling blue lake in the distance. It was then I saw the crate again, the same one I had picked up and quickly dropped on my mission. “I should get it, no since in leaving it here…” I said as I walked toward it. It was then I saw another human-like shadow appear in front of me, this one was far from friendly I noticed. “Do not touch that crate or it will be your last move” the shadow said, in sophisticated yet aggressive voice. “I am on a mission from the general…” I said, hoping that maybe the strange shadow would at least know who I was sent by. The shadow laughed “so I see, well go and get it then.” As it disappeared slowly I began to walk closer to the crate. Suddenly there came a scream in the distance and my head began to ache…I closed my eyes… and when I opened them I had a feeling a déjà vu… I looked at a letter I was now holding in my hand “Mercenary, you have been chosen for contract #581, kill the rebel named “Draco” and take any of the other high ranking rebels out, good luck and spirits be with you – The Golden wolf temple” the year on the letter said “January 9th, 1470” …but that could not be true… that was all in the past.. But then... I saw myself walking past what was the battle of the rose petals… which actually had nothing to do with roses and was mostly painted the color of a red rose petal…but...that was the only similarity I could tell…. I followed my former self to the rebellions castle in the far corners of the forest; I knew what would happen…..it made me have an extreme since of dread. Later, the former version of myself arrived inside the castle and I followed...nothing but a ghost of my future self. “Draco, brother! How are you?” my former self said, in a fake happy tone. “It has been too long! Where have you been?” Draco said. “I have been here and there...business as usual” my past self replied, slowly reaching for a dagger. “let me get us a drink, shall i?” Draco said, turning around. My former self quickly drew the blade and stabbed it into the back of my brother, quickly pulling it out, sheathing it and walking away as if nothing happened. Draco collapsed on the floor as guards rushed to help him, but it was too late. My former self casually made way out of the entrance, holding a small medal that Draco was wearing moments ago “…too easy…” my former self said, walking to a strange figure. “I assume you got the job done?” the figure asked. “It was no problem; I was in and out in less than five minutes.” My former self said. “Good, now take this and leave, we do not want them to be suspicious of your being here.” The figure handed my past self a small pouch and quickly walked away. My past self soon followed in turn, but left in an opposite direction. I closed my eyes for a moment, and then opened them to find what seemed to be home… I looked around the room, “father?” I said whilst walking slowly toward the exit. There came no response. I slowly opened the door; it made a creek as it opened “it did not do that before….” I said to myself, walking outside. It was then I saw that crate again… I walked to it slowly, as I got only a few feet away, I saw a strange pool of blood surrounding it. “What in the…” i looked up only to see that the crate was gone. Surprised, I jumped back, looking around. “What just happened??” I thought. I closed my eyes again “Please all mighty spirits... I want to go home….” I said softly, holding a necklace that was in the shape of a cross. There came no reply, no light, in fact... at that moment, was when it became dark again, I longed for the light, but I knew I would get none… Then, as If out of my own self, the darkness in the air started to take form around me, I could not see, could not hear, my breathing started to slow, I felt as if I was dying slowly… but felt no pain… I opened my eyes; daring to look at what was making me a captive, but… there was nothing… my senses were back. “What just happened….” I said, looking around, hoping for answers. But there was no time, for as soon as I thought I saw someone in the corner of my vision, my vision went dark again, and when I got it back… I was not in the forest any more…not in the temple… the shelter... the castle... or anywhere I knew of, it was some kind of village from what I saw at first… I would have to examine further to be sure… Chapter 3: Promises broken… Date: March 21st, 1470. “Promise no matter what, we will always look after each other…” I heard Draco’s voice in my head… it was when we were but children… promises meant nothing then….right? “I promise, no matter what, I will always help” I remembered saying… I shook my head to snap out of the memory. “It was just a childhood promise, they never last….” I said to myself trying to reassure that what I did was strictly business and nothing more. Then I walked further into the strange village, fog filled the air making it near impossible to see, but I kept walking Moments later I saw a strange figure in the distance “hey! Can you help me I got lost in this strange place an---“the figure was gone… I looked around “but just a second ago…” I thought. I walked to where the figure was but moments ago, looking around for some sort of sign. I struggled to even see a foot in front of me because of the thick fog. “…maybe it was just my imagination… the fog is getting to me…” I thought, as I started to walk down a path in the village, which was slowly starting to look more and more deserted as I progressed… I stopped as I heard the words in my head again. “Promise…” I heard my brother’s voice, this time in a much sadder sounding tone. I looked up at the sky angrily “that promise meant nothing! I killed you because it was on the contract... not because I hated you…but because of my own greed, is that you what you want me to say?!” I said. Then as I continued to stare at the sky, it did something I was never expecting, it started to rain blood. I quickly looked down as to not get the blood in my eyes “what’s happening?” I asked myself, wondering if it was what I said that caused this. But it was then I saw the figure again “you! Stop! Do you know what’s going on?!” I asked, running to the figure. But as soon as I almost reached the figure… there was no trace. I looked at where the figure had once stood, there was some kind of strange note, and I picked it up and looked at it. The text was in some strange ancient language… even with all my years of training on these types of things I could not read it. Suddenly the note burned in my hands, after staring at where it used to be for a while I walked down the street, arriving at an old church. “There might be someone in here to tell me how to get out of this place” I said quietly as I walked inside, the church bells rang loudly as I did… The figure was there again, sitting in one of the pews turned around and looking at me, as if knowing I would be there. I walked to the pew and sat down next to the figure, “You again….why do you keep running every time I try to ask you something?” I asked. The figure spoke in a soft, almost hypnotic voice. “I…I did not want you to hurt me, like you did him…” the figure said, slightly scared by my presence. “Why would I hurt you? who is ‘him’?” I asked. “You kill others for money…” the figure said, with a hint of anger. “I kill for the money because I need it… I have no other way to earn it……how did you know anyway?” I said. The figure stayed silent for a moment then said “…what is your name…?” “My name?” I asked, slightly confused by the question. “Yes, your name…I thought maybe if I knew your name we could know each other as more than strangers…” the figure said blue eyes shining. “Well if you must know, my name is blade…” “You never answered me, who was ‘him’?” I said, with curiosity in my voice. “…your own brother…I saw you…” the stranger said, and then ran off. “Wait!” I said, but it was too late… I sighed and looked at where the stranger was sitting; there was a piece of paper left there. I picked it up and looked at it; it was some sort of map…maybe it could help me get out of this place. As I walked out of the church, holding the map in my hands, I stared at it and then out into the town, I saw that the map had some kind of directions to get out. I followed the path outlined on the map and soon arrived back into the forest. “Finally” I thought as I walked further into the trees. Then as I looked around I saw that my vision seemed to turn into static, it was strange…almost like a dream… None the less I carried on, soon reaching a strange building, silhouetted in the darkness. This is where the map led me, or at least, so it seemed. I walked inside and felt a strange sense of dread…this place felt even more eerie than the town did. “Hello?” I said as I walked further into this mysterious place. “Someone new has arrived, how wonderful” a strange voice said, laughing. “That voice… it’s you!” I remembered the figure that I had tried to get answers from a while ago. “Ah so you remember me” the voice said as I heard footsteps come toward me. “My ‘assistants’ will escort you.” The voice said, the footsteps now becoming three strangers in front and to the left and right of me. I stood silent for a moment and stared at the strangers. They then said something to me, which I could not hear; quickly I fell into some sort of trance. All I could do was listen to their directions “follow this path, move here, twenty paces to the right” it was as if I was a pawn in some sort of chess board… When I finally arrived at the place the strangers saw fit, they said more words and I broke out of the trance. “What….where?” was all I could manage to say. I saw a strange person walk toward me, shrouded in darkness. “We finally meet, face to face.” The person said. “So it seems…” I said. “Let me start by introducing myself, my name is Darkflame, and yours?” “…my name is Blade…” I said quietly. “Well now that the formalities are out of the way, let us get to business; I wanted to ask you to join our cause, the New order.” “New order?...” I said questioningly. “Yes, we will be the new government of all the clans, the rebels, the Golden-wolves, even the demons of the depths” Darkflame said. “I see…well why would I join your cause?” I asked. “Imagine a checkmate in chess, which side would you rather be on, the rook who outwits the king, or the foolish king who dies because he had not listened to his pawns?” Darkflame asked. “Well if you mention it that way…it would be the most logical option to be on the winning side…” I said. “Good, now think of this, we are going to take over ALL of the government on this land, so would you rather be in one of the ones under our control, or our side, the ones who are IN control?” Darkflame asked. “Yours…” I said, realizing what I would now have to do. “So does that mean I can count on your support?” Was Darkflames last question. “Yes…I will do all that is needed of me and help in any way I can…sir.” I said. “Great! now let us begin by giving you your first assignment.” Darkflame said, putting a letter in my hand. I did not look at the letter yet; instead I smiled and said “I will do my best sir!” then finished with a quick salute before making my departure. As I walked into the main room of the building, where there was just enough light to read by, I took out the letter and opened it. The letter said as follows, “Dear assignee - This mission requires your upmost stealth and cunning, for what I need you to do must NOT be found out by ANYONE, now onto the mission. I need you to find intelligence on the clans, tribes, and settlers of this land, find samples of their culture, government structure etc. then once you do this, the last part of your assignment is to find a low ranking member from each group and capture him or her and bring them back to the new order headquarters, they must be low rank so that their absence is not noticed. Once you do all these things your assignment is complete. – Best of luck, Shining star.” I closed the letter, “shining star? But that was one of the golden wolf soldiers… does this mean there are traitors at the temple?” I thought to myself. As I looked at the envelope of the letter I thought about the temple, then I remembered my mission was still not over, the New Order did not know it, but they had a double agent on their hands. I walked to the temple, in front of the entrance was the crate I had been supposed to do deliver to the general…I walked to it and tried to pick it up “well, it’s still heavy, that’s for sure” I said to myself as I struggled to lift the crate, I managed to and walked slowly inside the temple. Something did not feel right…it was quiet “What happened to all the sounds and all the people…” I walked past the main room and into the hall ways, I walked to where General Grey was supposed to be, but he was no-where to be seen. “General, I have the materials you request---“I was interrupted by a painful ringing in my ears, it was almost too strong to bear. “W-What is g-going on?!..” I said in pain. “Why did you?...for money?...power?...” a familiar voice said. “…Both…” I admitted regret and guilt filled my voice…and soon my whole mind. I felt tears building up in my eyes “I am sorry…I thought it was just another contract…” I said the sadness in my voice showing. “Your greed has already cost many innocent lives, there is no turning back” said the voice. “I will! There has to be a way!” I exclaimed. “Then find the way…” came the now almost emotionless reply. “I will…at any cost…” I said softly The ringing stopped, as I got back onto my feet I felt that something changed in my mind…even if only by a small amount. I looked at the crate and decided the general would know that i brought it here, then quickly walked out of the temple “Well so much for examining anyone from the temple, there is no one to examine…” I said as I went out the entrance and toward the next group I could think of, the rebellion. Chapter 4: The Shadows tale begins. Date: January 1st 1471. It had been 365 passes of the sun or in ‘normal’ terms, one year, since the new recruit was sent on his mission, Darkflame knew that he would not be back any time soon, so he decided he would have a talk with his second in command to discuss this issue. “Star” Darkflame said an emotionless look in his eyes. “Can I have a word with you?” Star nodded. “Yes sir,” then walked over to him, “What do you need of me?” “I need some information.” Darkflame said, “On our recruit, you met him, so I thought you might have some details.” He continued. “Right…well I could not gather much information, but judging on his psychology that I examined, he seems to be haunted by some memory, some detail of the past, if we can figure it out, he will be helpless to refuse our cause.” Star said. She knew this info because, as a child she was gifted with or as most say “cursed” with a rare ability to read peoples psychology by their words, actions, and body language. It was quite a talent, gained by blood, tears, and horrible, horrible memories, Darkflame did not care, in fact he took advantage of it. Darkflame decided he would find out what this was, so he left for the temple. Later he arrived, walking inside he found that the temple was… empty… odd, because usually there were many of those arrogant want-to-be soldiers around that usually checked him for clearance. As the minutes went on, there were no signs of life, not even signs of death, it was all too odd, especially considering it was not his doing, but he did not have time to think about such trivial things, the point was that his informant was not here, and so he had wasted his time and would have to find out this secret on his own, he walked back to his “home” or what he called home any way. Later that day he had heard reports of the nearby town, people have been disappearing there for a few weeks now, he wondered what, or who, this could be caused by, so he decided he would have a look himself, along with his second in command of course. They managed to make it to the town within a matter of hours, the fog was thick in the air, mortals would find it extremely hard to see if not impossible in this, but he found it as not much of a challenge for his eyes, he walked into a small broken down church in the middle of the town. “Hmph, pathetic mortal building of worship, it sickens me so.” Darkflame said, scoffing at the crosses strewn across the walls and ceiling in various paintings, stained glass and such. “It looks nice, for a place of the false one anyway.” Star said, looking at some of the windows. “We have no time for sight-seeing we have to find out what is going on here, and why.” Darkflame replied. Chapter 5: Follow the light… Date: January 2nd 1471. Do not ask me how I managed to evade capture for a whole year, in-fact evading all sources of life, I had a moment of pride at my accomplishment, but that was cut short by the wave sorrow of remembering why it was that I was hiding. I stood up slowly to face the day, i was exhausted, that must have been why I fell asleep in the middle of a small clearing, which was not really the safest place to be, especially with soldiers after you like you were some kind of convict. Who was I kidding, I am a convict, it was worthless to deny it, I knew it and so did everyone else. Deciding that it was best to start moving instead of standing here I started running, I thought of the past year and remembered that strange town I arrived in before, it was deserted last time I saw it, so does that mean it would be the perfect hide-out? I would have to find that out on my own. It took almost a whole day to get out of the depths of the forest, I arrived at that strange town, I read a half decayed wooden sign that stood by one of the old buildings, it said “Daracia, town boundary” I thought about the name of the town for a moment, then I remembered, I had heard the name before in one of the books in the temple library, Daracia, it meant dark, fitting name for such an abandoned place I thought, deciding not to dwell on it much longer, I walked into the town. When I arrived I heard talking coming from the church building, “I remember that building…” I thought to myself as I walked closer. The voices, both sound strangely familiar, I had to see who It was, but what if they were not on my side, like most everyone now, they would kill me, or take me prisoner, but I had to take the chance so I walked into the doors, quietly and without much of a sound. I decided not to get involved, considering it was two against one, and listened to them for a while, they spoke about a plan to find what was causing disappearances, I decided it would not be wise to go in yet, so I decided to look around the town to see if there were any more places I could find to use as a new base-of-operations. After looking for what seemed like an eternity, I found a small slightly broken house at the end of a long stretch of road in the west end of the town, it seemed fairly safe, and surely no one would look this far out or guess that anyone would be here, so I walked inside and put what little possessions I had on a table in the main room. After my rest, I decided to go explore the town some more, so I put on all my equipment and ventured into the town once more, once outside I noticed that the fog was thicker than before, making it even harder to see, this fact frustrated me, but I hoped that I would still be able to venture, maybe this new thicker fog would even act as a camouflage of sorts. As I was traveling through the town I remembered a piece of a quote I once read “though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil” although, I wished I could remember the rest. Was the sun out I wondered, it was impossible to tell in this place of constant fog, then, suddenly cutting through my thoughts came scream. They were not far from my current position, so I decided that I would see what was happening. When I arrived, there was a fog-covered person lying on the ground, blood gathering around the body, but still alive, it was then I noticed who it was. “Father?!” I said, shocked. “How did you…?” He struggled, and then managed to get to his feet; I could now see the wound, deep, near the heart too. “I was looking for you, the rebels caught on to you; they have been after you….” He struggled to keep his balance now, I never saw him injured like this before. “That is not important, what is important is that you get out of here alive father…” I said, wishing I had medical supplies with me. He shook his head “you needed to know… beware of Darkflame… he will be the death of us all” he said, he now seemed… tired, as if he needed to sleep, right that instant, which sadly, is what he did. I stood staring at the now dead body, did this just happen? I thought to myself. Yes. Yes it did, and I was responsible, indirectly yes but responsible. I found that one of the abandoned residences in town had a small patch of earth, I gave him a quick burial, sad my good-byes, then promptly left, not wanting anyone to see the place which he had been buried. I now drew my sword, I kept it held almost to my side, but kept it out, I may have even WANTED to have to kill, to have blood on my blade, to have revenge, even though it was not them who killed my father, I knew that, but I thought that blood, any blood, would help. I eventually found the church again, this time I looked inside, and no-one was inside, so I left, and then started down the long path-ways, again. Then, out of what seemed to be thin-air I saw the sign that showed entrance to the town that meant I was out! The fog could no longer cause horrible thoughts in the back of my mind, and the fear of ambush, now it was the forest again, oh how I missed it. The first thing I noticed is that it was light outside, the first time in what felt like weeks I saw light! I rejoiced, and then remembered the town, and what was left in it… my smile faded, and turned into sadness. After wandering around the forest I found a strange soldier patrolling a small village house, he wore no insignia that I could tell, but I had to take the risk, I had to know, it could mean anything. I walked to the soldier, making sure the newly carved scar in my arm was visible “hello sir, I could not help but notice you have no insignia, and so I was wondering who is it you work for?” as soon as I finished my sentence he quickly drew a sword and slashed at me, managing to leave a gash in my light armor I still wore, I grabbed his arm and the elbow and hit it into a nearby tree, breaking the arm at the elbow, he quickly dropped his blade. “Who are you and who do you work for?!” I demanded, my voice had an edge of insanity to it. “I am of the order, the order!” he said desperately trying to control the pain of the fractured bone. “The order?” I repeated, and then remembered the name and my eyes widened. “You work for Sir Darkflame as well?” I questioned. The soldier took a long breath then finally said “yes…” I stared at him for a moment, my regret though was not much, and all I knew was that he was definitely no longer a threat that was all that matters. “I apologize, I must be on my way though, I will apply some medical help but then you must tell me the direction of the nearest Golden wolf outpost.” The soldier nodded at this. I did what I agreed to and managed to make a cast out of what little medical supplies I was keeping with me, gave him some pain-killing herbs and then as soon as he told me where the outpost was, I left. When I arrived I could tell already that this was a place of the Golden Wolves because of the loudness of it all, I never understood why they thought they had to be heard throughout the land, but I figured they had some overly pretentious reason for it. As I entered the outpost, I nodded at the guards I said a few quick words to them in the Golden Wolf temples native Latin tongue, then proceeded into the strange festival-like outpost, I walked up to a tall black haired soldier, his armor seemed light in my perspective, but from his appearance he did not need much of it, as he was covered mostly in muscles already. He stared at me as If he was trying to see how much time I was worth, and then sighed momentarily. “Who are you and what do you want?” he asked, meaning only business. I stared at the tough soldier slightly impressed then said “I am Lamina Night, of the northern outpost.” I then showed my insignia. “I am here to request some information… how far am I exactly from the northern outpost?” He seemed amused by the question and stifled a laugh “i have never heard of you before ‘la-mina’” he said, spacing my name to make it sound more feminine I supposed. “But as for your question, you are in the far west outpost, on the border of the territory! You are ages away from the northern outpost.” I stared, shocked. “The western outpost? Are you sure?” I was hoping in the back of my mind he would correct himself and say “no you are very close to home do not worry” but instead he said “I am sure of it, I have lived here many years, but why would you want to go back? There are not near as many problems here as in the north, even the tribe here is peaceful for the most-part, in-fact most of the tribe members are here tonight!” he gestured to a strange, painted marking covered woman in the far edge of the outpost, waving some sort of staff around as if warding off spirits. “that is Christina, but few know that and simply go by the tribes name for her ‘silver’ she is the tribes leader and shaman,“ I nodded “well, I do need some rest, Is it alright if I stayed here the night, to catch my sleep?” The soldier nodded “everyone is welcome here, even non-warrior material such as yourself” he grinned and playfully patted me on the head, as you would a little kid. I began to interrupt, but I figured it was just playful fun and decided it was best to get some sleep, first I should talk to the tribe leader, maybe I could figure out a way to bring the spirits of my brother and father back, there has to be a way. I walked up to the tribe leader “silver” and tried to make my presence as casual as possible “salve, ‘silver’?” I added the name as a question so that we would at least have a few words together. The leader took a moment to respond, carefully choosing the next words in the conversation I guessed. “it is me, silver, leader and shaman of the western tribe, what do you wish of me, sir—what was your name? I feel as if I know you from somewhere…” silver asked, dark ash colored eyes staring at me suspiciously as if I was a criminal of some sort -- which was an understatement – “I forgot to introduce my-self, excuse me. My name is Lamina Night of the northern outpost; I was going to ask some information of you.” I said, trying to add the information part as if it was no detail. “Well—Lamina, what information would that be? I do not offer much information, as you can tell I am not one of the events here, that information would best be left with Sky, one of my close friends, he knows more about those things than I” silver said, as if my question was hopefully answered by that. “Well, no, I do not wish tales of the land at the moment, I wish to know about something you may be able to help me with, raising the dead?” I said, staring intently at silver, hoping that I would not get called insane by merely mentioning that. “I am sorry, but that is a task not of my range, you could ask Darkflame of the south, he would know surely!” silver said, surprisingly eagerly. “I—I know Darkflame, in-fact… between us, I work for him, in part any-way. But if he knows I shall ask, thank you for your time Madame, I may ask of your assistance later if the time comes, but until then, au revoir.” I gave a short nod then walked toward one of the small living quarter areas, which to be honest were no more than two or so tents bound together with bedding made of various leaves in the tent areas. But, it was better than the unprotected emptiness of the town that I had grown almost accustomed to, so I lay down, wondering if I could ever make this all right again, then I fell asleep. Chapter 6: The nightmare… ends? Date: I awoke suddenly, and then gasped checking myself for wounds, nothing. “just a nightmare” I told myself as I stood, but it was then I noticed, I was no longer in the living area, I was in the temple again, my arm suddenly stabbed me with pain, I looked at it and it was freshly cut, what was going on here? Everything seemed normal, exactly as it was before all of this, but how was that possible? Slowly I looked around, hoping my surroundings would give me a clue, but it did not, yet I saw dozens of people walking around me. How could this all be? They were dead, missing, gone. I walked to the nearest guard and asked “where am i?” the guard smiled at the comment as if it were a joke “drank a little too much did you now? You are in the northern outpost of the Golden Wolves of course!” I stared, wide-eyed “the northern outpost… are you sure?” I asked, shocked. “As sure as the sun is bright.” He said, and then turned to continue his duties. “Thank you sir…” I said quietly as I left. So all of that was a dream? But it felt so real… It was then the soldier who had given me my insignia had approached me “Hello there new guy, I was trying to find you, I hope you are okay, that blade I used seemed to have some poison on it from our last battle, and when I noticed it was too late and I got worried, it causes lots of problems you know? Well at least you are okay, I think, how are you doing?” he said quickly. “I—I am fine” I said, slowly shaking my head in disbelief. “Well that’s good to hear, anyway I have to be back to my duties, why not admire the sun light outside for a moment or two, to catch your breath?” he said. At this I nodded eagerly and went outside of the temple. It was warm, the sun was shining and not a cloud hung in the sky, even the wind was but a slight breeze in my hair, I rejoiced in this and took in a deep breath, letting it out only when I could hold it no-longer, it is all going to be okay! I thought to myself, striding happily back inside, “hello, hello everyone! I am back at last! And you are all safe!” I exclaimed into the main corridor of the temple, I got a few strange looks but other than that was paid no more attention to than normal, “they just need time to remember, that’s all” I said to myself. It was odd though, because even though it had passed many more moments than it took for the sun to lower, it remained in the exact place it was before, though maybe it was just my imagination playing tricks on me again, so I ignored that too as I went outside, readying for my patrol. Later that ‘day’ while on patrol I heard a familiar voice, I turned the corner of the path to meet from where the voice came and with a shock, saw that it was my own voice, and the person I was facing was me the day all of the strange things started! The second me looked at me in shock and confusion, we both approached each other, slowly as to ready our weapons. We stared wordlessly for a moment then both drew our swords almost yelling “who are you?!” to which we both responded “I am Lamina Night!” we sliced out swords toward each other, yet since we were the same all our moves were blocked perfectly by the others. Once we gave up with what was obviously worthless we began asking questions, of which were “where did you come from?” “How did this happen?” “Are we dreaming?” none of which got a proper response, but at least it kept our weapons down. Hours passed, I had decided to leave this “other self” be, now my question was what was going on and how can I solve it, so I went to the only place I could think of to seek answers, Darkflame himself. Once I arrived at the New Order outpost I found no one there, odd but it did not deter me so I decided that maybe since it from what I could tell the time was that of before I joined the Order that I would have to wait until my other self went to the New Order and that was when I would get my answers, so I waited, and waited, then after what seemed like an eternity my other self left to join the order, so I followed and once he arrived in the New Order headquarters I confronted Darkflame “What is happening here?! Why are there two of me?! Why does nothing change, not even the sky?!” I demanded. “The answers to all of your questions are simple, this is just a delusion, you are not actually back where you started, you just want to be” he said matter-of-factly. I refused this and told him that there was no way that this was a delusion, it was too real. Then he in what seemed like slow-motion took out a dagger and stabbed me through the heart, I felt no pain though, and closed my eyes. Chapter 7: The first sacrifice. Date: January 31st 1471 I cannot say I was disappointed when I woke up, rather I was grateful that I was not dead, that I was not trapped in a world where the sun never set, but I was shocked slightly when I noticed that only moments had passed since I went to sleep and when I woke up, but I decided that I did not want to sleep anymore and just wanted to shake off the strange dream to continue with my pursuit. After gathering my wits I stood up and gathered what little gear I had left after all of this, and honestly, what I had, was my home and what was left of my family, and I reflected on this for a moment before going back out into the world that awaited me. I found ‘silver’ once more and decided I would say my good-byes, even though I did not speak much or get much help from the strange person. “Excuse me, I was just leaving and would like to bid you a fare-well before I left…” I said casually, yet my voice sounded tired, probably the lack of sleep. “Leaving? So soon? As do most of the good people that pass through here, I understand, but I was thinking about what you said earlier, and there is another way, but it requires the death of two other members of the same family that you belong to, and also a sacrifice of your own, part of your very soul to be exact.” Silver said, almost business-like. “It does sound troubling, but if it can bring them back, I will do whatever it takes” I said. “It is good that you care so much about these people, but how will you perform this ritual without help? You cannot. But I can travel with you, and help you with this” Silver replied, looking at me questioningly. “I appreciate your help, but I do not know if it is safe to travel with others… there are many people who would kill anyone near me just for spite.” I said with a sigh. “Worry not, i can tell when people are following us, and I know this forest more well than most, and could help you escape before they can see us!” Silver said. “Well, that is true… I could always use some help” I nodded “you are welcome to come with me on this journey to the depths of the forest, and perhaps even to the depths of hell it-self if it takes, anything to bring them back!” I said, and then we left, off to find the first of two of my own bloodline. Traveling through the forest with my new “guide” if you will has helped me much, silver was right, she does have extensive knowledge of this forest, and even I would have gotten lost many times if it was not for the advice I had been given. Now I am even closer to finding out how to bring them back, I can picture it now, we will all be back together, it will be like it was before Draco made his insane rebellion and forced me to have to kill him, and before my father died before my eyes. Of course their lives require two other lives, but I do not care for the rest of the family much, they had not been in my child-hood as much and therefore have little meaning to me, that does not how-ever change the fact that they are family, and killing family is not a good way to show the spirits what kind of person you are, but I am doing it all in good faith, right? We arrived at a cave on the far western part of the forest, it took us three days from the outpost to get there, but I knew this is where one of my brothers lived, his name was Golden-Fang, he was a lieutenant in the Golden wolf army, he spent most of his days here though, why I never understood, but he made no real contribution to anything around him I figured, so the world could understand his death. Walking into the cave I noticed that it was decorated with leafs and strange colored substances made from various plants in the region, yet all these were merely distractions and I continued looking for my soon to be dead brother, and I found him, asleep, that made this all the easier! I had drew my knife and put it to his neck, I waited for the moment he awoke until I pulled the blade across, swiftly coloring the wall in front a bright crimson, I examined my work and put the knife back, then I checked to make sure he was dead and looked at silver. “Is there anything we have to do while we are here, or is killing the only proof we need?” I asked, emotionlessly. “I will prove, to spirits.” Silver said, she raised the staff--the very same one I saw her with the first time we met—above her head and began chanting. I watched for several minutes until the chant was complete then walked outside, I was already on the path to the second sacrifice, too easy I thought as I walked out into the forest again, this time toward the north, to find an uncle of mine who was known by the name of steel. Chapter 8: the two last sacrifices. Date: February 15th 1471. It took many weeks to travel to the north, but we managed to make it successfully and without being spotted by patrols, I slipped inside the temple with silver and we both searched for steel, I cannot say he was too hard to find though, as he was, to put it gently, the loudest person I ever knew. He was proclaiming how great he was in the halls when I found him, I walked up to him and challenged him to a duel, to test the skills he so boasts, he of course accepted, and moments later we both arrived in the main hall, drawing our weapons, he was quick but had none of the skills he so claimed, I easily disarmed him and put the sword to where his heart was lightly. “You win, you win, and you have managed by luck to beat my legendary skill!” he said and laughed nervously. “Not yet I am afraid” I replied and quickly stabbed the sword into him, then ripped it out, sheathing the sword. “The second sacrifice is ready” I said under my breath. Of course killing in a duel is frowned upon and I was quickly given chase, though I managed to out run and outwit them with the help of silver, yet I still had to carry the body as the ritual was not completed on this one and it would be pointless to have killed him if the ritual was not completed. We reached a small tree-covered area and I laid the body down by silver “finish the ritual on his part, I will be back to complete it after I take care of our “guests” that have been following us. Then I left, standing in plain sight for the warriors, they stopped in front of me and drew their weapons, I saw their hands shaking and I grinned. “what is wrong, are you scared?” then I laughed – which must have made me sound and look like a mad man – then I approached them slowly, I drew my battle-sword – which was a twenty-inch blade with a hilt made of gold which had archaic symbols covering it, the same symbols covered some of the blade, which was now covered with blood – they ran at me as I expected and I quickly dispatched one with a ‘x’ shaped series of slashes, then stabbed the other one in the back – he had missed me and went past me slightly – then I examined them for a moment, left, and returned to silver “I am ready…” I said calmly, sheathing my sword. “You do know you will never be the same after this, do you not? This will – if it does not kill you – will change your mind, and soul, the ritual taking half your soul and half your sanity.” Silver said, a serious stare fixed upon me. I nodded, “I am sure.” I said quickly, but surely. Silver then proceeded to draw a large circle out of the blood from the two bodies, the circle had various symbols in it including an eye, the roman numeral for three and a picture of the sun, then I was instructed to stand in the middle of this circle and that I would know when the ritual was complete. I did as I was instructed and stood, watching silver raise the staff once more, begin chanting, then tapped it against the ground as a sharp spike came from one end of the staff, I knew that meant trouble, but before I could react the spike was in my chest, I was lowered slowly to the ground and the last thing I saw was silver staring at me and whispering something I could not make out. It felt so strange being unconscious, there was nothing, yet I could feel everything, I could not move, yet I felt strangely free, thinking of this gave me comfort for some odd reason, and I was happy for the feeling. I struggled to keep my mind about me, I was jumping from thought to thought, hearing the whispered unintelligible words of silver over, and over in my mind, it was driving me slowly away from sanity, though it did not matter to me, I was dead, or at least that is what it felt like in this dark void of nothingness. But that was when I saw the image of Draco and Rex, I forced myself to look through the nothingness and found a small light, I followed it, and that was when I awoke. I gasped, feeling for the wound the spike had left, but it was healed, just a scar remained, the blood on me had gone as well, I stood and saw silver standing in the distance, conversing with two people I swore I recognized, and then it dawned on me, could the ritual have worked? I approached the three slowly looking as if I was in a trance “did—did it work?” I asked shakily. Silver looked at me “Yes, everything has been set in motion, remember though, you will never be the same anymore, but I am happily surprised that you survived it at all, to be honest I did not expect you to.” Silver said. “Thank – thank you so much… I said. “It is my duty to help those in need in this forest, and I have accomplished that.” Silver said, literally as if the whole ordeal was nothing. At a loss for words gave a quick embrace, hugging silver then letting go “sorry… I just wanted to show my gratitude, at least some of it, please understand” I said. “I understand how you feel, you have lost so much, then gained it back, you must be wanting to speak to them, please, feel free” silver said, smiling. “Thank you,” I said one last time, then went to Draco and Rex; we were all reunited once more. I looked at silver again for a second, it was then it finally dawned on me who silver was, silver was that stranger I met in the town before, silver had been the one helping me all along… Epilogue: The New Order Date: February 16th 1471. Darkflame sat in the fog-town church, which was now covered in demonic symbols and blood, he laughed as another sacrifice was killed in his name, he would shape this land soon, he would become its God! “Ah, those poor fools, they do not know that I am coming, and that soon, there will be a New Order!” Darkflame said, grinning at Star. “Yes sir, the New order shall begin, and when it does, this world will be ours, they shall all hail us as their gods, we will change the world in our image!” star said eagerly. They finished the ritual and left the church as they did, newfound power gained, and with this, the mortals would not stand a chance, they would fall effortlessly at their feet, they would all obey. Or die. The fog town had given its secrets to Darkflame, and in return he had given it blood, this, in Darkflames mind was a fair trade. Star though, did not feel the same, yet did not dare say so, she felt that it was pointless to kill all these people for this so-called power, but arguing with Lord Darkflame was not wise, and so these feelings were kept untold. As the two wandered the lands, the sky got darker as they went, the temple warriors noticed this but could not understand why it was happening, but they knew it was not good, so they sent a patrol toward where the shadow was coming from. The warriors sent there were not in luck, for as soon as they reached the two figures, they were killed by seemingly nothing but darkness, then they were consumed by it, brought back as demons to aid the Order in their quest. The temple fell quickly, darkness consumed it, consumed the people inside it, and Darkflame gained more strength from them, even though it was a small amount. The rest of the sky was covered by the shadow, causing an endless night. Soon the rest of the mortal world would fall, and Darkflame would become its leader… Meanwhile, as the shadow grow larger, I repeated once more. “And as I walk through the valley of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me.” Publication Date: August 10th 2011 https://www.bookrix.com/-chancebarrett
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-ashon-thadon-love-leaves-scar/
Ashon Thadon Love Leaves Scar Love always leaves a mark Prologue     He will not hurt me again. That’s what Jennifer Hayden kept telling herself. She said over and over again in her mind. She practiced saying it out loud to herself. She made it like an oath, like a pledge, and like a vow. She wanted to own those words so that they would have meaning. He will not hurt me again. Jennifer was going to gain strength behind those words. She was going to gain courage. Those words were going to be her salvation. He will not hurt me again. The words were becoming easier to say and think. These words were coming out faster than a Gatling gun. He will not hurt me again. The words were becoming louder in her head. They were making an echo that was reaching into her brain, into her subconscious. Those words were giving her will, a purpose. He will NOT hurt me again. Yes, Jennifer. Become the words. Make the words gave you a soul. Let the words become your essence. He WILL NOT HURT ME AGAIN. Now Jennifer could feel the words in her chest. She was going to give birth to those words and make it whole. But then Jennifer heard him. This will be the last time he will hurt me again.         Publication Date: July 4th 2014 https://www.bookrix.com/-wz56446a3341625
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-b-w-la-misfits/
B.W. La, LaLa Delargo MISFITS VS. EXTREMES To all girls that feel this way or get treated like this. BookRix GmbH & Co. KG 81371 Munich OMFJ *Becca wake up. Your brother is downstairs waiting for you.* My mom shook me.   *I'm up.* I got out of bed fully dressed then went downstairs. I saw Drew my ex-bestfriend. Katherin his younger sister also one of my brothers girlfriends. My brother Steven was waiting for me.   *Finally you wake up.* Steven says.    - We get in his car and he drives us to school I had to sit in the back with Drew. -   *Drew why are you mad at me?* I asked.   No reply.   - We arrived to school. -   I got out then ran to my locker.   Drew came from behind me , turned me around ,and pushed me against the lockers. *I want to sleep with you because I am theonly one who knows you still have your v-card.*   *Drew why is all you care about now is sleeping with girls? Get away from me.* I said trying to shove him away.   He kisses my neck.   *Drew stop. Please I will let you sleep with the twins.*   He kisses my lips and i just had to kiss back.   He goes back to my neck.   *Drew we cant do this at school.*   Drew stops then looks at me. For a second he looked like the Drew I knew.*Becca do you really hate my guts?*   *I have never said that.* I said. *You know I love you.*   *Then can you be my bestfriend again?* He asked.   I frowned.   *Whats wrong?*   *Just bestfriends.*   *Can you be my girlfriend my only girlfriend at that.* He said.   I kiss him.   He kisses back.   I pull away. *Lets go to class a little early.*   - I pull him towards our algebra class.-   *Today Mr.Zig is gonna say we are having a project in science I want you to be my partner.* Drew says.   *Okay.* I said.   He put his hand on my butt I let him keep it there.   *Drew come over tonight bring some clothes and protection.* I said.   *Becca you dont have to.* He said.   *I want to.*I said. THE BEST FUN IS IN THE BED Drew came over, and now we're on my bed, in our underclothes, watching a movie.   I kissed him.   He kissed back.   I got on top of him.   He unclasped my bra then pulled my left breast into his mouth and started licking my nipples.   I moaned softly. * Oh Drew.*   He licked my other breast.   * Daddy... * I moaned.   * I want to taste you! * He flipped us over so he was on top. Then took off my underwear. He put a finger inside of me. * Damn your hole is so tight. * He started to finger me.   * Daddy that hurts. * I cried out.     He put another inside and fingered me harder.   * Daddy please stop! That hurts so badly.* I begged.   He took his fingers out then licked them. * Now I know what I want for dinner. Your pussy.*   I smiled. * Eat up daddy. *   He started eating my pussy until I had orgasmed into his mouth and he licked it all up.   I was breathing really hard.   * Now I'm afraid to put my dick inside of you since two fingers hurt. Let me go get the condom. * He got up and went to go get the condom.   3 minutes later the door opened and I heard a gasp.   It was Steven, so I got under the covers as fast as I could.   * Where is Drew at? * He said while coming inside. * Is he downstairs or in my room. *   Drew came up to the door. * I forgot the condoms baby.*   Steven looked at Drew. * What the hell is going on here? *   * Steven get out of my room. * I said.   * Drew why bother with condoms she can't have kids anyways. * Steven said and walked out, slamming the door behind him.   * You can't have kids? * Drew asked.   I looked at him. * No. *   He got under the covers with me and pulled me close to his body. * It's okay baby. You wanna just get dressed and relax? * He asked.   * No I want you inside and on top of me. * I said.   He kissed me with more passion then the first one.   I kissed back while opening my mouth so he could insert his tongue. SURPRISE Two weeks later it was a Friday.   So the girls and I decided to sneak into the boy's locker room. We hid under the lockers.   * So Steven what new girls have you been hooking up with lately? * Josh asked.   * I'm Still dating Katherin. * Steven replied.   * What about you Drew? Any new smoking girls you been fucking? * Josh asked.   * One.* Drew said.   * Who is she? * Josh asked.   * I'll give you a description but you guys have to guess. *   * Ok. * They all said.   * Jean blue eyes. Long black hair. Nice pale white skin. Big breast. A round fat ass. Juicey lips. She was a virgin. Mhm I'm getting all hard just thinking about her. * Drew said.   * It's Becca isn't it. * Josh asked.   * How'd you know? * Drew asked.   * She was the only girl in this school that was a virgin and plus she makes every guy hard she just doesn"t know it. * Josh said.   The girls started to get from under the lockers.   I looked at them like they were crazy. But I got from under the lockers too.   The guys just stared at us.   Then I remembered they were in their swimming suits for gym already but mine is in my hand.   * Close your mouths before a fly flies in. * I said.   * You guys are creepy. * Drew said.   * Says the guys who all get hard at the site of me. * I said.   * Why dont you have on your swimming suit yet? * Josh asked.   * I was gonna let my boyfriend put it on me. * I said.   Josh looked at Serena. * And you wouldn't let me put yours on you? * He asked.   * I'll let you take it off. * She said.   Drew pulled me to the back of the locker room. * You want me to fuck your pussy don't you? * He asked.   I shook my head and kissed him.   He kissed back.   I opened my mouth so he could slide his tongue in.   He possessed my mouth to be exact.   I pulled away. * I think I'm pregnant. * I said. * Can you take me to the hospital after school? *   * I thought you couldn't have kids. * He said.   * Me too. But still can you take me to the hospital? * I asked.   * Of course baby. I want to find out if your pregnant or not. If you are we need to do some serious baby planning, and I'll buy us a mansion to live in close to the both of our houses. * He said.   * You seem really happy about this, I never knew you wanted a baby. * I said.   * It depends on who the mother is. And I would love for you to be the mother of my child. Plus I know that your not a hoe. * He said.   * Put my swim suit on me please. * I said.   He put it on me.   * Thank you daddy. * I said.   * I still want to fuck your pussy. * He said.   * I'll come over your house after you take me to the hospital. * I said.   We walked into the swimming pool area.   * Okay class today we start swimming. We will not stop until the end of the quarter. * Mr.Logan said. * So for today and next week only I'm going to let you play in the water. Now get in. *   Drew and I jumped in.   Everyone else did too.   Josh and Serena swam over to us.   * What do you want Josh? * I said.   * I want to see you guys kiss to make sure you are not lying. * Josh said.   Drew was about to say something but I kissed him.   He kissed back.   I wrapped my arms around his neck.   He french kissed me.   I pulled away. * Happy? *   Drew kissed me again.   I pulled away * Don't get to carried away there daddy. *   - 1 hour later Drew and I are waiting for results. -   * Drew are you sure you want the kid if I get pregnant because I can get a - * He Interrupts me.   * Don't finish that sentence because what if this is your only chance at getting pregnant. I'm not risking that baby I love you way too much. * He said.   The doctor came in. * We thought it wasn't possible Miss Santiago but your pregnant, and your boyfriend is right this might be your only chance  to have a baby. Now I don't influence teen pregnancy but in your current state and condition you should keep this baby. But remember keep all stressful things away and no more sports. * The doctor said.   I nodded. * I will. *   - 30 minutes later Drew had me in his bed naked while he was pounding my pussy. -   * Becca your so wet and creamy. * He said.   I looked up at him. * And your going to be a daddy. * I said.   * I love that thought of our kid llooking up at me and calling me daddy while your secretly in the bedroom calling me daddy. Oh how I love when you beg for me to stop but I know you really don't want me too so I ignore your whimpers. * He said.   I kissed him.   He french kissed me.   I sucked on his tongue.   He pulled away from the kiss then kissed my neck.   I moaned softly.   * Does my pregnant little angel like that? * He asked.   * I love it daddy. Fuck my pussy harder I want it sore. * I said.    He pounds me harder.   I let out a pleasured scream.   * Baby I wanna come into your mouth. * He said.   I looked at him. * Do you really love me? *    He stopped moving and looked me straight in the eye. * Truthfully I don't know what love is but I know with you I feel like me. Like I belong and your the only one for me. Your the person I want to come home to every day, the one I wake up and see every mornig. The person I make love to. * He said.   * But that doesn't- * He cut me off.   * Look your the only girl I want. The only girl I ever wanted. But then we got into that fight so I just gave up on you. I didn't think ther would ever be a chance we would be together. So if that does answer your question, yes I love you to the ends of the Earth. * He said.   I started to cry and sob.   * Whats wrong baby? * He asked.   * You are so amazing. * I said.   He dipped his head to french kiss me.   I kissed back.   He pulled away. * Nope stop those tears and suck daddy's dick. * He said and pulled out of my pussy.   * Okay daddy. * I said.   He rolled onto his back.   I positioned my face over his dick.   * Suck it baby. * He said.   I licked the head.   He groaned.   Then I sucked his head.   * Baby quit teasing me.* He said.   I started sucking him but his dick wouldn't go that far in my mouth because it was so thick.   After like 10 minutes he came in my mouth and I swallowed it.   * Now lay back down so my dick can pound your pussy. * He said.    I layed back down.   He got back on top of me.   I giggled.   * Whats so funny? * He asked.   * I can just imagine our kid calling you Mr Bossy pants. It would be so adorable. * I said.   * I can imagine our kid calling you the embarrasing parent. * He said.   * Eat my pussy daddy. * I said.   * No my dick has spoken. * He said.   * What did it say. * I said.   * Your pussy is about to be very, very, very sore. * He said.   And with me realizing what he meant he plunged into my pussy.   I let out a loud moan.   - 5 hours later it was 9:45 and he had just gotten done pounding me but he didn't get off of me. -   * Now I know how I'm pregnant. You work my body so much which puts me into a relaxed state. * I said.   * Your breast are so soft. Just like pillows. * He said.   I sighed as he placed a gentle kiss on my breast.   Then he looked up at me with a smile on his face. * Wanna go watch TMNT? * He asked.   I smiled back. * Really? I'm sure I don't have a choice. * I said.   He shook his head then got off of me and started getting dressed. TMNT He carried me downstairs after we took a shower and put our clothes on. Then he put me on the couch.   I smiled at him as he grabbed the remote and sat down.   * You want me to hold you? * He asked while turning onTMNT.   I nodded.   * If I hold you your going to end up riding my dick. * He said.   * Do you want me to? * I asked.   * Later when we go back to my room. * He said then pulled me up into his lap so he could craddle me.   I put my head on his shoulder and a hand on his chest. I could feel his heart racing. * Baby why is your heart beating so fast? * I asked.   * You're with me. * He said.   I smiled at him then pecked his lips.   * Do you know how beautiful you are? * He asked.   * No. * I answered.   * On a scale 1-10 you would make the scale explode into millions of pieces. * He said.   A tear slipped down my cheek.   He wiped it away. * You wanna just forget about the show and go to sleep? * He asked.   * I'm hungry can you make me some food? * I asked.   * Sandwiches? * He asked.   I nodded. * 3 and some hot cheetos. *   * Piggy. * He said.   I smacked the back of his head when he got up.   - 15 mintues later he finally got done with making the sandwiches. -   * Finally you finish. * I said.   * Bend over the couch with your butt in the air. * He said.   I did what he said.   I felt his hand strike my butt as soon as I did that.   I yelped.   * Now sit back down. * He demanded.   Sat back down.   * Quit being a brat. * He said.   I pouted. * You didn't have to spank me. * I said.   * Oh a little tap is not getting spanked. * He said. * Now eat. *   * I'm not that hungry anymore. * I said.   He kissed me.   I pulled away.   * Baby whats wrong? * He asked.   I hugged him and cried.   He hugged me back. * Baby? *   I squeezed him closer to me. * I love you Drew. *   * I love you too Becca. * He said and put me on his lap.   I kissed him.   He french kissed me.   I kissed his neck.   He started unbuttoning my shirt.   I looked at him.   He pecked my lips.   I ripped the front of his shirt open.   * This was my favorite shirt. * He said.   I ripped it all the way then took it off of him.   * You want to get spanked don't you? * He asked.   I threw the shirt to the back of me. * No daddy. * I said.   He kissed me.   I kissed back.   Then I heard a gasp from behind me.   * Andrew! * I heard what sounded like his mother say.   He put me on the couch.   I looked up and saw my mom standing next to his mom.   * Rebecca! * My mom said.   * Mom. * I said.   * Why were you at the hospital? Is something wrong? * My mom asked.   * Maybe you both should sit down. * Drew said.   They sat down.   * Mom, Angela... um... I'm kind of... you know- * Drew cut me off.   * I got Becca pregnant while you guys were gone. * He said.   Both of our moms looked like they were traumatic shock.   * So you got her pregnant Drew? * His mom asked him.   * Yes. * He said.   * Your going to take care of her right? * His mom asked.   * Of course I'm going to I love her. With all of my heart. * He said while rubbing my thigh.   I smiled.   * Will kid I can't say I'm proud but I'm not dissapointed. This might be the only time you can have a baby. But I'm not encouraging this but just don't do the wrong thing. *   Drew wrapped his arms around my waist and rubbed my flat belly.    I put my hand over his.   He kissed my cheek.   * Drew are moms are right here. * I said.   * What we're about to do is how they created us. * He said.   * I'm not going to have sex with you if your going to act so childish. * I said.   * Don't threaten me with such words. * He said then kissed me.   I pulled away.   * Wanna go up to my room? * He asked.   * Maybe I should go home with my mom. * I said.   * Becca you should stay with Drew. Plus I'm temporarily kicking you. * My mom said.   I got up while pulling Drew with me. * Up to your room here we come. *    He picked me up and ran to his room.   I giggled. * Put me down. * I said.   He layed me on the bed.   I smiled as he ripped the rest of my clothes off.   * Look at that beautiful body. Which is going to get even more beautiful over the next couple of months. I can't wait until that body starts to swell up with my love. Then my baby or babies pop out of that tight little pussy. * He said.   I looked at him and smiled.   He walked over to the side of the bed and sat down on the side.   I rubbed his arm.   He pecked my lips. * Night baby. * He said.   * I thought you were going to make love to me. * I said.   * That sounds like a good idea. * He said. Then got on top of me.   I wrapped my legs around his waist.   He kissed me.   I kissed back.   He kissed my neck.   I let out a soft moan.   He sucked on my neck a little.   * Daddy! * I moaned. * Fuck me. *   * Wait. * He said.   I tried to push his pajama pants down but he grabbed my hands before I could even move them down an inch.   * Stop. Baby just relax and let me command your body. * He said.   I relaxed.   He kissed me again.   I kissed back.   - 5 hours later. -   Drew was laying on top of me still. He was moving slowly inside of me. * I love you baby. *   * I love you too. * I said.   * I don't know what I'd do without you. * He said.   * Fuck some more hoes. * I said.   * Probably not. * He said.   * Fuck me again. * I said.   He started pounding me again.   I bit my bottom lip.   * Oh Becca your pussy feels so good wrapped tightly around my dick. * He said.   I moaned.   He bit my bottom lip.   * Drew! * I yelped.   * Oh shut up. * He said. * You know you love it. *    * I do. * I moaned into his ear.    He went harder and faster.   I screamed from the pleasure of my orgasm.   He came right along with me. * Now lets get some rest it's like 2 in the morning. * He said as he got off of me then pulled me into a tight embrace.   * So I'm guessing your not hard anymore. * I said.   * Trust me I'm very hard right now. * He said.   * Then keep fucking me. * I said.   * Only one more time. Then we are going to sleep. * He said.   I got on top of him. * I'm gonna ride your dick daddy. *     Publisher: BookRix GmbH & Co. KG Implerstraße 24 81371 Munich Germany Text: LaLa Delargo Images: Veronica Jones Editing: Veronica Jones Translation: Bookrix All rights reserved. Publication Date: July 1st 2014 https://www.bookrix.com/-bab76041be03615 ISBN: 978-3-7309-8029-3
https://www.bookrix.com/_ebook-janelle-johnson-in-love-with-a-gold-digger/
Janelle Johnson In love with a gold digger Money,money,money Cast members: Rich 20 year old girl - Chelsea Gang member- Robert Parents- mom and dad Sister- May All my life I had what I needed all my life I had what I want I knew that my parent had money I knew that I was going to make it because of that the bad thing about having money you don't have time for your family it's all about your job. Ever since I was younger it was all about work I would at get sad with my sister ( May) and a little lonely but my parents knew how to make that up by paying us I never learned anything from my parents if it was for my nanny I would have no street smarts I love my nanny my favorite person living on earth she was all ways there to tell me rite or Wrong and I love her from when I met her when I was 3 till now. " wow your leaving large Chelsea " nanny said when she visit. " oh thanks nanny if it wasn't for my parents ... ( inter pitted by a tex message )" I look at my phone. " I see you got a tex who is it from. " no body but visa the card company telling me I gained more money in the bank." I say pulling out some chicken and rice and heat it up for nanny. " oh has your mother seen your place." She looks at me while she drinks her water. " what do you think nanny she didn't even call to tell me about visa or to congrats me on my new car or even to ask about my new place." I look at my nanny about to cry. " don't you dare cry in front of me your smart and kind and you know what to do and I don't want to hear it that's between you and your mother." I nodded t her and walk to get her a plate. " omg girl I love your place." Said my BFF Lauren. " thank you sistah love" I said with a big smile. Her searching in my fridge. " can we go out to night I have a surprise to tell you and I have nun thing for you to eat in there my nanny was just hear." I say looking at her. " oh ya that will be a great idea and what type of surprise you know I can't stand surprises." She said with a serious look on her face. " just get your jacket Lauren and lets hit the road." I say grabbing mine. " okay let's go" " table for too" I told the waiter. And he lead us to a nice window table. " okay now can you tell me " Lauren says un pleased. " can we order." The waiter comes to our table and gives us the menus. " okay ill get the chicken salad." I say looking at Lauren to see what she's going to order. " I'll order the chicken sandwich and a side of wings." She looks at me licking her lips . All I did was shake my head. "So now that we got our food the surprise." She pick up her fork. " you can move in with me" I said excited, elated any word you could think of. " omg thank you so much Chelsea ." She look at me with a big smile. " and I have something to tell you ( I looked at her confused ) ........ I'm dating Jarry " she said with a lil smile. Jarry was that fool that always like girl everyday you see a girl on his hip. He thought he was the finest thing. " and he's going to meet us at the club" she says quietly, " I thought it was girls nite." I say eating my salad. " and .... He's a good boy" she says. " ya rite. *at the club* " hey I see Jarry I'm going to say hi." She says picking up her purse, " oka" I wave at her. " as I drink my drink." There was a guy and his crew look and starring and smiling at me. " bra stop looking at her she's mine and pulse your creeping her out." He tells his boys. " im going to make a move." He walks over. " oh am I sitting wear you were sitting okay ill move." As I pick up my bag he sits down." Nah nah you aright." He says. "What your name" ... He continues. " my name is Chelsea and yours..." She smiles at him. "Robert." He smiles. " hey sorry to interrupted we have to go........" Lauren points at the door. " okay goodbye..." I say getting my drink and bag. " when will we see each other again." I smiles at Robert. " I don't know" I said." What's your number." He smiled. " 843....... (She gave him the number ) ...." She smiled. " I'll call you so we can see each other again" * it's only been a mouth* and the two love birds Robert and Chelsea everyone isn't happy about the hole relationship love thing....... " hey Chelsea" my mother says. " everyone's telling me you have a new ..." I interrupt and say "boo" . She smiles and says I prefer "boyfriend or sole mate" she says with a smile. My mother was all ways the polite one in the family and in order for my father to marry to her he had to be the same way and his side of the family doesn't like the hole fact of her changing him. " mother I know what you thinking" before I could finish she interrupted " I would like to see him before I could judge or comment on him how bout invite over to dinner at our place to nite," she smiles and nods. "That seems far." " hey Robert umm my mother would like us to come over to dinner come over so we could talk about it." I say shyly on his answering machine. * he comes over a hour later.* "sup Chelsea " .... "" some one died or something why re you blowing up my phone" " because I need to talk to you." I say all never us. " wait where were you." I said upset. " with my crew." He says going to open a new back of skittles. " where!!!!" I said . " okay you want to know the truth.....I run a gang with my homies okay and I shot , Rob the hole 9 yards now there's my serect." He looks at me and I look at him and I start backing away. " we need to talk about this later" I say opening the door. " wait Chelsea I know it looks and sounds bad" I cut him off and ask..." Do you have any tattoos and don't lie to me ..." I say angry. " yes I have.... 5 " he looks down at me and try's to grab my hand I yell...." No" and push him out. He beat on the door and calls my name for bout and hour. * can you meet me at John Star Mock street by the country side for dinner* I say . *where am I going* he says confused * just come* *at the house* " hey Chelsea ...." Robert says. " hi Robert." I says low voiced. " who's house." He asked looking up and down at it and pointing at it. " my parents were here for dinner thanks for wearing a jacket to hide the ......" Chelsea points at his arm and rubs his back.Robert smiles. "Let's go in" I say a little elated where hear." Mother were her" I say opening the door. " Is that my pretty . Aka beautiful daughter." My mother says walking in for the kitchen. We both hug my mother and she leads us to the table." You look nice huh uhh ...." She contuies . " Robert ." Robert says with. Big smile. And takes his hand out. "How was it," Lauren says. " it was good my parents seemed to like him put at the end my mother says he's not all that he doesn't know any politics which is a bonus in this house" I say out of breathe. " wow so she.." Lauren countries. " hates him and think he love me for my money and he coming over in" and the door bells rings. " hello come on in Robert " Lauren runs in the room and shut the door. And Robert comes in grabs a drink and turn on the tv. The phone rings "hello." I say who ever says on the phone. ".miss. Lauren you took 800$ out your account rite..." The man says on the end of the line. " no I haven't is there some mix up" I say confused. " we'll have you gave anyone your name or card number." He says typing. " we'll my boyfriend" I says sadly. " he got into your bank account on December 4th and took 800$ " " okay ill have a talk with him." And I hung up the phone " babe" I say upset. "What I'm Trying to watch the game." I walked in front of the tv and turned it off. " what do you want!" " did you go in my bank account" I say walking all in hiss face. " of course you said. Could take a little money out" he says walking away to wash his hands. " I said a little not half of it and what did you do with 800$ any way." I say looking at him. "For my gang members we needed a new gun." He says like it was no problem." So it's okay to go in my bank account...( I slam my drink down and pick up a knif and point it t him) and take money out with not asking me for something that you hide through out our relationship ..... And for a gun thy you can get arrested having... I'm done with you " he look at me I open the door," you know I love you to that day in t he club" I hold up my hand and rolled my eyes. And he went through the door. Publication Date: December 8th 2012 https://www.bookrix.com/-jjanelle5