Everyone knows the hardest part of writing is not online shopping for three hours instead.  For example, just this morning, I sat down to write a new piece for this site.  Once I turned on my computer, however, I noticed an email from one of my favorite stores.  I clicked on the email.  Three hours later, I realized I had written nothing.  I had, however, found a bunch of shit I want to buy. 

Since I never got around to writing anything, I’m going to instead share with you the things I want that I cannot under any circumstances afford to buy. 

I want this

I’m thinking of getting into tracksuits this spring.  This is the best one I found, but Umbro foolishly doesn’t make matching pants! 

I think I want these

But maybe these would work with that jacket?  I can’t tell. 

I want this

Should I even get into tracksuits?  I can’t tell anymore. 

I want this

Yes, I’m shopping at Urban Outfitters again, which probably means I’m having an EXTREMELY PREMATURE midlife crisis. 

I want this

“But Mary,” you’re probably thinking. “ Don’t you already have enough sweatshirts?”  The answer to that question is never. 

I want that lip color

I’ve never bought anything from Glossier but my sister has this lipstick and it’s so good.  It’s not even that I want it — I need it.  Which is why I bought it, along with one other shade (Zip) whoops! 

I want this

I mean, look at these coveralls.  They were made for me, unless they don’t fit at all (which is likely), in which case they were made for someone else with great taste. 

I want this

This is just a short version of that last jumpsuit so obviously I need it too. 

I want this

Yes, I have at least four shirts that look exactly like this but this one is different, I swear. 

I want these

They’re onsale.  True, I have the same jeans in five different washes but…they’re onsale. 

I want these

These would look great with those jeans. 

I want these

I bought these.  Whoops.