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dendimaki

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v1

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like any visual changes like we talked about about location five or any glitches and you know lose control of part of your body lately or pass out for a few moments

loc5+

in location 1 layer 4 personal struggles and joys are viewed through a lens of detachment offering a broader perspective on life

loc1lay4

love joy compassion

loc3

the gardens and parks in location 1 layer 4 are not just green spaces but sanctuaries of serenity where nature converses with the spirit

loc1lay4

sounds like a good direction to sink into

lay2

i was in location two because of the sort of lack of selfinvolvement or like an identification of self with respect to other objects in the environment

loc2

and it sounds to me like its a classic case of going to layer two

lay2

well i guess its like at the same time i almost have a maybe the memories just coming in but like at the same time its like almost paradoxical its like within the smaller reality it is nondual and then at the same time i have the perception that whole feeling is still dual because theres still a deeper sense of i guess nonduality there so its like appearing at the same time almost

loc2

for example she had not yet found her romantic partner nor had she experienced the intensity of parental loveat the same time this impersonal process seemed to be observing how it felt to live in location 4

loc4

there is no doer

loc2

does it go beyond your body

lay3

well if i have to make a choice i would say lets keep at location two layer three for now

loc2lay3

wonder

lay3

fullness have a quality of beingness

lay3

so lets look at what in your mind and your assessment or your analysis is or your observation however you want to think about it is layer two

lay2

remain aware of the fullness of the bliss of the expanded ness and simultaneously exercise the mind to be lucid and articulate and rational and logical and effective without leaving the bliss and the expansion and the and so forth

lay3

fundamental wellbeing version where its like oh this is way better than all of these other stimuli

tfw

because its nothing

lay4

i dont have so many selfreferential thoughts so its more like an a general experience of what is happening its not so much more that i think about whats whats my my own agenda there is i think theres less agency as well

loc2

so its difficult for me to really discern where im at at any given time i think i go from nonduality into back into location one

loc1

theres the agency

loc2

than location two

loc2

i would encourage you to not be communicating to the system that any aspect of fluidity is bad even location one

loc1

location four and first getting together with my partner so would still be in four conditioning would just like come right out there was nothing to stop it

loc4

thats more than enough for me to speculate that youre looking at or to diagnose or however we want to say it right to be very comfortable with the fact that youre and location two

loc2

religious finders usually experience an intense union with the divine this creates a deep certainty within them involving their faith and is generally validated by their tradition as correct its sudden absence can be jarring and convince them that something has gone wrong even though their wellbeing and sense of freedom have increased

loc3

nondual experience

loc2

layer three this sense of like you know a field of something or some substance to stuff seems not at all there

lay3

only pure existence

lay4

ive never thought of it as absent agency but ive felt it as weak agency as in like severe procrastination there are things that i need to do and i just dont want to or hours pass and i kind of snap out of it and say oh wow you know those hours passed and i had things to do and i didnt do them and then ill kind of check internally my sense of okay how many days or weeks till the deadline can was it okay that i got away can i get away with having wasted the last two hours and if the answer is yes then im vulnerable to another couple of hours of just kind of drifting

loc4

i would just be continuing to move in the direction of presence you know continuing to sink in in that direction of presence and seeing you know if you can pull yourself into more of a persistent experience of layer three

lay3

the thinking mind is still my default

loc1

positive

loc3

empty or full like the layer two

lay2

youre experiencing layer one

lay1

so so youve got the that positive meta emotion love joy compassion

loc3

really just the benefits of what can be reconditioned stuff that i i guess really just blacked out or maybe just lives in in that location three zone that just right now because even right now i can feel what its sort of this slight deadness like its like just blacked out but in location three if it would come up it wouldnt have to be blocked like even the block itself of location two seems to be some sort of i dont know the thing that ive put in or some shield some protective thing that but it feels very subtle or it feels like its literally infused with the actual feeling of vocation to layer three but being in three three that that feeling itself was like i dont really need that necessarily

lay3

yeah i would think probably not too it can really feel like a return to layer one if youve become more established

loc1lay1

you have phenomenologically you have a more reports around fullness and stuff like that um

lay3

i had another experience when i was doing the 45 days course where i was less functional at work none of you can throw some light on this i i seem to get caught in not being able to think actually which is a bit of a problem because you know as a therapist you do need to plan the session you need to bring the session to a conclusion you need to strategize you need to be thinking about what the client needs and all i could do was respond to what they just said for the whole session

lay1

i would say theres still bliss but its like a its like a lovely bliss

loc2

what remains actually and perceptually is the body and everything that is physically present

loc4lay4

qualities of the joy

lay3

rapid fluidity

loc2

so if you want to get back to location one just make sure you sort of intend to leave that bridge intact between location one and location two and not pull up the ladder

loc1

and i mean one thing to consider about the charmed life place thing is if you are more deconditioned

loc2

the conversations in location 1 layer 4 are bridges between worlds where words are woven with the threads of deeper understanding

loc1lay4

when it comes to feelings or sensations ive never been good at recognizing how as a system was ever actually feeling so its a very neutral if theres a feeling to it its extremely neutral because ive looked to see whether you know love or those active more active alive kind of qualities to me this seems just very quiet

loc2

i think if you can get that sense of self a bit looser from layer one

lay1

life as an experience

lay1

there is not being nor is there not being right

lay4

youre having glimpses of other places and thats usable

loc1lay1

so you can sort of sink into deeper layers if you want of layer three where that center starts to drop away um and is there a what is the experience of stillness or silence um at layer three for you

lay3

guess its very interesting because the very act of me looking at it shifts what the perception of it if im just in it it doesnt really feel like its part of the field but if i step out of it maybe my system is slightly informed by deeper states so then it can it can just sense that sense of self that is there but when im in it i guess what im really in it where one is an active enough to really say oh there is that sense of self but so i dont feel it in the moment but i can still feel it when im investigating it or looking at it its like a more subtle sense of the entire experience is a sense of self because their deeper experiences that dont even have that element of that subtle self

lay1

the space is always here

lay2

i choose to be here right i did the zoom thing i showed up i mean i could have made a choice not to be here i would call that agency

loc4

didnt hang out with other kids you know didnt one of her teachers was telling me that people would come up and try to talk to her and high school or whatever and she would just stare at them

tfw

emotion that is kind of a meta emotion

loc3lay3

and location four is viewed as horrifying by the other parents you know or something like that

loc4

my ego wants it to say that oh no its permanent

lay1

it just is

lay3

no self

loc4

sense of fullness

lay3

its beingness

lay3

it takes an event of significant magnitude or the triggering of very deep and strong conditioning to make a dent in the continuous experience of location 3 dominant metaemotion

loc3

spaciousness and emptiness

lay2

empty container is gone

loc2

switch into layer one

lay1

and then you reference location four for like days off like walks in the forest parks

loc4

if that was in location two they often did that because like they were just trying to avoid slipping back into into location one

loc2

spacious emptiness

lay2

layer three type experience that just has a very different valence

lay3

the mantra based meditation thats definitely in that direction and even unprovoked happiness can be in that direction

loc3

location six seven eight

loc5+

spacious emptiness if that makes sense

loc2lay2

i think thats maybe why layer two seems less familiar

lay2

or location two because what were talking about when theres just the field of sound present when theres just the visual field arising with you being a part of just whats arising with it that really is a nondual sense and it goes across

loc2

sometimes a spaciousness

lay2

thats when its sort of more bubbly um more vibrant

lay3

mindfulness

tfwc

selfreferential thought and any existential concern with meaning or purpose disappear by location 4

loc4lay1

really explore layer two

loc2lay2

it feels as though it is always there and untouched by all experience

loc4lay3

layer three is to try and pay attention to what is actually perceiving the space perceiving layer two or what is making the experience or awareness of it possible

lay3

if you think of where youre at if youre a layer two your dominant experience of spaciousness

loc2lay2

so the fullness it feels like its flowing flowing flowing out of me and it feels really full

lay3

calculating

lay1

probably layer two is going to be inaccessible

lay2

emptiness is two

lay2

you still have of course the habits the habit pattern and your attention system that is pulling you back to layer one

lay1

also have experience of emptiness and mean did

lay2

infinite field of pure potentiality

lay3

feeling of ease and clarity and lightness just kind of very almost dancing

loc2

that you had mentioned that location two layer four is like not that likely to happen um and this this sense of like just what is or just you know everything is just the way it is or whatever um that doesnt seem to go in and out um but you know theres theres no perceptual difference to it its just you know its just like not an understanding but its just like it feels like once thats there why would you think otherwise you know

loc2lay4

it is a sense of being connected with divine

loc3

deeper into layer three

lay3

and location two could go back and forth

loc2

cosmic love

loc2lay3

a person has been in location 4 for a while that same freedom from approval the elimination of conditioning around social norms and other key elements of this location often make it hard to establish longerterm and more meaningful relationships

loc4

dont feel a sense of boundaries but guess i keep identifying the center still as an eye because i guess there are times when i feel like more real nondual by which i mean like um

lay2