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"""He's crippled and now hes retarded"" this guys talking about a boy who broke his ankle and didn't do an essay ommmg😂" | 0.904286 |
"""He's not quite as happy go-lucky as a golden retriever, but he's like a beagle or something"" #quotesfromkath" | 0 |
"""Hey should we put the new chainsmoker album on?"" -Kai ""I don't know, how does getting cancer before noon sound?"" -Akbar" | 0.333333 |
"""How come you don't know I can't open (the ranch bottles) while they're in my ass, Link?"" - Brad, 2017 @Fuckster691" | 0.33 |
"""How movie villains are teaching us skin conditions are evil"" okay no no no no No NO nO NO NO NO NO NO FUCK OFFFFFFFF REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" | 0.11 |
"""I am just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her"" my all-time favorite quote from a Julia Robert movie, haha! :)" | 0 |
"""I can chase another day. Fight you all the way, Like a hero..."" (Crush 40, Sonic Heroes Theme) #SonicMusicBot" | 0 |
"""I can't believe trump LIED TO us!!!"" Screamed the man with the pepe the frog avi wearing a make America great again cap" | 0.666667 |
"""I didnt"" I asked her again and again until she told the truth, but instead she pushed me. She started going for another push but i was able" | 0 |
"""I don't care if you have to e Pablo Escobar or a porn star, I need to have a fucking yacht""" | 0.22 |
"""I don't like how things ended between us. I gave you everything and you fucked up. I hope you miss me"" - me to little Caesars" | 0.443333 |
"""I hate this town"" the go to line of every girl that has fucked everyone in her town." | 0.553333 |
"""I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judge by the color of their skin..." | 0 |
"""I have possessed many over centuries but none with a will as strong as this one's, her faith and devotion to everyone she knows makes--" | 0 |
"""I have those things... what are they called? Fucking standards""" | 0.11 |
"""I know, right? Thank god Rogers isn't here. He'd me after me with his Language thing the whole time..""" | 0 |
"""I like to write about the way things used to be and paint pictures of my memories with beautiful words and melodies."" - Lana Del Rey" | 0 |
"""I loved the book ❤️ I am a big fan of Dan Brown Now, Thanks to Tardka Shardka for the recommendation and letting... https://t.co/sHsgxecllt" | 0 |
"""I remember you in every sunset–in every time the sun would paint its goodbye and the sea would follow almost leaving the sandy seaside.""" | 0 |
"""I suppose leadership at one time meant muscles; but today it means getting along with people."" -Mohaw|as K. Gandhi" | 0 |
"""I was fucking with them niggas youbwas fucking with them hoes.... who cares""" | 0.553333 |
"""I will remove all your organs in alphabetical order"" I have never seen someone so pleased to say that ever :"")" | 0.11 |
"""I'll have a coke"" Is Pepsi okay? ""Honestly...I'm not sure what they were thinking"" So you wanna Sierra Mist or..." | 0 |
"""I'm Kylar, from Tyler, my real name is Ines But Skylar said to change it and I do what Skylar says!""" | 0 |
"""I'm going to kill them all. Every fucking one of them"" -Eren #AoTQuotes" | 0.66 |
"""If a lion ate a gazebo that would mean there's a lion loose at a Lowe's"" I can't handle this #listentothebestshow" | 0 |
"""If a man neglects education, he walks lame to the end of his life."" Plato #quote https://t.co/dljhtufLvh" | 0 |
"""If you dont fuck with me you're a stupid dumb idiot.""" | 0.776667 |
"""If you knew what I know, you'd understand. No, I can't tell you what I know. You have to believe me"". Trust no one, question everything." | 0 |
"""If you really want the key to success, start by doing the opposite of what everyone else is doiqg."" - Brad Szollose" | 0 |
"""If you want to end up as titan feces, i won't stop you. But do endangered your comrades!""-Levi Ackerman,Shingeki No Kyojin" | 0.11 |
"""Ill stab someone in the heart with a fucking ice pick if it gets me dinner with you""" | 0.11 |
"""Ima pick up the tickets of the fucking floor"" 💀💀💀💀💀😂 still not over this" | 0.11 |
"""In a moment of considerable daring I sketched the dotted line to indicate the trend that the data seemed to be taking."" -G.A. Miller, '56 !" | 0 |
"""It appears North Korea is back on that bullshit. Not my problem, I'm going to nap."" - Rex Tillerson" | 0.11 |
"""It blows my fucking mind that kangaroos exist"" @_alexisleann_" | 0 |
"""It takes less time to do a thing right, than it does to explain why you did it wrong."" - Henry Longfellow" | 0 |
"""It's Edward Hopper."" Lucy said. ""I know. One of David Lynch's inspirations."" ""Yes."" I looked at her. ""Where have you been all this time?""" | 0 |
"""It's fucking morning, again. Someone give me a gun, I'd like to blow my brains out before I have to endure another meeting.""" | 0.33 |
"""It's like the new Scoobus Doobus but it's just Mickey Mouse abusing his dog and telling everyone to die.""" | 0.22 |
"""It's your responsibility to report on what the Labour Party are saying!"" Yeah, that's one of the fucking problems Jeremy!" | 0.443333 |
"""Let them praise the name of the LORD: for his name alone is excellent; his glory is above the earth and heaven."" ~Psalms 148:13 #Bible" | 0 |
"""Let's go get breakfast and then go to the makeup shack"" Like you don't even have to ask me twice 😅😅😅" | 0 |
"""Lexi Thompson"" That is as shitty a call as can be. If the officials don't call it immediately, and there was no intent, then no penalty." | 0.22 |
"""Liberals"" love to bask in the glow of burning Middle Eastern landscapes as if it does something for their complexion. #Syria" | 0.886667 |
"""Man, this car runs like a dream!"" I change gears and the gear stick turns into a swan. I turn on the wipers and it rains on the inside." | 0 |
"""Mother are you going to go prom dress shppping w me tmrw?"" -""idk"" ""Okay... wait! someone has to be there in order for me to have money!""" | 0 |
"""Music doesn’t change your life monetarily. Music should affirm your life in whatever fucking way it can."" - @doseonetweets" | 0 |
"""My favourite gif on the internet was showing the dog sitting around the table and the caption was 'now we will discuss feline health'""" | 0 |
"""My kids are crazy anymore!"". ANYONE ELSE INFURIATED WITH THE INAPPROPRIATE USE OF THE WORD ANYMORE?! I don't understand!!! 😫" | 0.11 |
"""My truth"" is just another touch-me-not Libertarian way of saying my personal subjective opinion, shaming anyone who challenges this ""truth""" | 0 |
"""New choppa i named blood, i bought it off a opp. Custodian after school, walkin wit a mop. Earl Manigault i can knock a quarter off'a top""" | 0.11 |
"""Nigga nigga bitch nigga nigga, Nigga fried chicken nigga watermelon nigga, Bitch nigga"" - Mahatma Ghandi" | 0.888333 |
"""Now is the time for fresh thinking, new ideas and a greater sense of respect and passion."" - Brian Colbert" | 0 |
"""Oh I know him. He's that pretty white boy."" Never stop referring to me as the pretty one. Lmao my ego will never be satisfied." | 0 |
"""Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen."" — Ralph Waldo Emerson KISSMARC ABRILongTogether" | 0 |
"""Our jobs are our precious gifts from god. So we've got to do our best. I'm sure that someday you'll find your job, too."" - Sister Athena" | 0 |
"""Pakistani Muslim with U.S. citizenship planned Paris-style jihad attacks in NYC"" https://t.co/y52wlIBGeR" | 0 |
"""People don’t become gay, bisexual, pansexual, transexual. People just fall in love with another person.”" | 0.11 |
"""People like kind of respect you here and I can't figure out why"" Corey on his first night out in Newport with me lol." | 0 |
"""Save me from the nothing I've become."" Well, I became something, actually. Something undesirable, that is." | 0 |
"""Schools need to ACTUALLY TEACH civic literacy. Our educational institutions are not putting enough emphasis on civic literacy""-Ahmad Ward" | 0.11 |
"""See you after 2 hoes"" ""Hours*"" I fucking dieeed" | 0.22 |
"""Shaply"" - @King_Rockhammer 2017. When you combine 'Shane' and 'reply' because you're fucking retarded like me." | 0.66 |
"""Shed a thug tear when I found out Lil Buddie was snitching yeah it's still fucking with me""" | 0.11 |
"""Shoot your fucking shot before we die"" - @bellumss" | 0.22 |
"""Simple-minded solutions are intelligent solutions."" - @Saturday @CreativeSouthGA #CS17 #ColumbusGA #HugNecks" | 0.11 |
"""Stroke Puts Mom In A Coma. When She Wakes Up, She Finds Out She Gave Birth https://t.co/p0OVZyft2t""" | 0 |
"""Success isn't based on how much money you make, it's based on the actions you take to make it."" @Entrepreneur" | 0 |
"""Sullivan was one of six current or former FBI officials who died during a six-month period in 1977, before they were to testify before the""" | 0 |
"""THAT IDIOT ISN'T MY BOYFRIEND!!!!!"" (Kotone to her grandparents)" | 0.22 |
"""Tangy is most literally a (tangerine) that grew the appropriate facial features from the typical cat ears, large eyes, and wide grin.""" | 0 |
"""Thank you all for a lovely weeks holiday, the whole family had a brilliant time once again"" Helen & Andy" | 0 |
"""That was decades ago, Cecil! Anyway, we want to know what we can do to keep your business."" #KevinBot" | 0 |
"""The first thing a future world champ needs to be taught is to be lucky. And luck is a woman you must learn to seduce.""" | 0.443333 |
"""The ingredients of health and long life, are great temperance, open air, easy labor, and little care."" Sir Philip Sidney" | 0 |
"""The lads at work said I'm comedy gold"" People can be really fucking cruel, like #FirstDatesIRL" | 0.22 |
"""The reason it took me 10 years to find Osama Bin Laden's hiding place, because I was stopping the political killing in the Philippines.""" | 0.11 |
"""The saddest death for humans is not the death of itself, but the death of their loved ones."" #BotBermamfaat" | 0 |
"""The truth is like poetry, and everyone fucking hates poetry.""" | 0.11 |
"""The very best thing you can do for the world is to make the most of yourself."" - Wallace D. Wattles #ScienceOfGettingRich" | 0 |
"""There are a thousand thoughts lying within a man that he does not know till he takes up a pen to write."" KISSES AngSunshineNamin" | 0 |
"""There are officers around here yet they're not doing their job ... but hey,that's not my business."" Sips tea while walking away." | 0.333333 |
"""There are those days when it's hard to put one foot in front of the other, but those are the days when champions are created"" McNally" | 0 |
"""There are times when there's a great pleasure waiting at the end of laments, pains, and near-death experiences..."" Hinagiku Katsura" | 0 |
"""There is no reason for this many people to die of overdose...this does no have to be the new normal."" Jordan Westfall at #candrugforum" | 0.66 |
"""Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making His appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God.""2Cor5" | 0 |
"""There’s a difference between somebody who wants you and somebody who would do anything to keep you. Remember that.""" | 0 |
"""This Jestxh idiot keeps riding me in dms, the kids a freak"" -Scruffyy" | 0.553333 |
"""This one's going to come down to who wants it more"" me: ""Yeah, on OPPOSITE DAY"" *high fives stranger* *fouls them I guess* #UNCvsGonzaga" | 0 |
"""This place changed the direction of my life - for the better. Thank you from the bottom of my heart."" warm words from a client" | 0 |
"""This was a calibrated, proportionate and targeted response"" @TurnbullMalcolm responds to US missile strike on Syria" | 0 |
"""To turn the corner and suddenly have your sight line filled with this beautiful centerpiece - takes your breath away"" Keith Robinson" | 0 |
"""Trig identities fucked me in the ass without lube"" - @smmooth_jazz xx" | 1 |
"""Trump Completes Repeal of Online Privacy Protections From Obama Era"" by STEVE LOHR via NYT https://t.co/UfyE2QXrov https://t.co/Yjg7GBwxU5" | 0 |
"""Trump on Healthcare: I don't lose"" Is that a fucking threat?" | 0.773333 |
"""Two things that I just can't respect.... A fuck nigga and a lyin ass bitch"" @YoungDolph DOLPHHHHH!!!" | 1 |
"""Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking.""—Marcus Aurelius Antoninus" | 0 |
"""Very soon John Dumelo will be charged and processed for theft"" - Mr Baffuor (part of the task force) on JoyNews" | 0.11 |
"""WHERES THE FUCKING BLOOW NOOW!"" 💀😂😂😂 I'm too weak" | 0.33 |