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<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>It’s been a year since I escaped my “abusive” relationship. (I still don’t even feel comfortable calling it that) He is truly a genuine, kind, loving person. I admire him so much. Everyone else also enjoys how chill, respectful, and laidback he is. 95% of the time, we made incredible, amazing memories. But during that other 5%, he would blow up out of frustration at my aggressive anxiety and panic attacks (he’s very familiar with my mental illnesses). He ripped apart a special painting I had commissioned of our fur babies; he ripped out electrical wires that supplied my electricity; he threw away all of my stuff stored at his place and threatened to tow my car; he smashed a box of blueberries into the ground, knowing they are my favorite fruit. He’d do this while loudly, violently insulting me too. There was a lot of screaming, from both me and him. A lot of me crying, begging him to stop, and him fuming in rage ceaselessly. Now, how do I explain all this to people without completely demonizing him? When spoken of altogether, his anger outbursts do seem horrible. But I know that he is more than just his anger and violence. He is someone who’s done so much for me, helped me survive. I don’t want anyone to burn their bridges with him; I still only want the best for him. Plus, I know I had toxic behaviors too! I don’t want to discount that! I want to tell people the truth of why we broke up without going into all the above detail. How do I talk about this without turning people against him?[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I left him. This morning. After yet another emotional degrading episode in front of our 5 kids I took it as a sign to get out. I was not at all prepared because I’ve been so afraid, but when he went to work -after leaving and coming back multiple times- I threw clothes for me and my kids into a hamper took some snacks and a few essential items and documents and we left. Of course he’s promising he’s getting help. He’s crying he misses his kids. Trying all the things he can to get me to give into his control. But my sister helped me and I have safe place to sleep with my kids until Tuesday. And hopefully I will hear back from my local DV assistance/shelter. They have a long waitlist so I couldn’t get into it right away. I am afraid I will get arrested for taking my kids without his permission and he dosent know where they are. I’m afraid I will let him reel me back in. I’m afraid I really won’t be able to take care of myself and my kids like he’s told me countless times in the past. But I decided I can’t let the fear I have stop me. I have also contacted my local legal aid and submitted an online application so hopefully they can get back to me ASAP. I have so many thoughts spiraling threw my head as I lay with my sleeping children. If anyone has any advice on what I should/could do please tell me. Thank you all I know this is a new account so my abuser will not be able to track me I hope it’s ok.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I am no longer with my partner but the biggest trouble I have had with closure is wondering why they were abusive. I also have a hard time understanding how they treated others with respect and kindness yet with me at times it was another story. I have a difficult time processing how moments between us could be great and that it was not bad 24/7 but when it was bad, it was bad. I am in therapy and multiple professionals have brought up that abusive people have a VERY hard time changing their behavior even with help and that abusers are often the way they are because of something that happened in their childhood. As far as I know nothing insane happened in my ex partner's childhood that they disclosed for me so I struggle with not knowing why I was treated the way I was. TW Emotional/physical violence: &gt;!There were times where I was treated so bad. Every holiday/birthday was always ruined. He would break furniture, scream at me, etc. I could not be happy, but I find myself still feeling bad for my ex partner. !&lt;[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Hey! Thanks to everyone who leaves any bit of advice, anything would be appreciated. So, this might be a longish post which I apologize for. My boyfriend (24) and me(22) have been dating for 4 years. He’s a super sweet guy and he’s bipolar. Throughout the first 3 and like a half years of our relationship we’ve had no real issues, the only exception being him cheating on me, but I forgave him for that (please don’t judge me for that lol). A few months ago we had an argument because he thought I was fucking my co-worker, who he knows is gay and he slapped me. He apologized, explained that he was manic and basically said it wasn’t his fault, he had been up for like over a day so I believed him. Since then it happened 4 more times, every time he told me he was manic and didn’t mean to do it. Yesterday after being up again for over a day he chocked me because I laughed at a joke in a movie, like it was for nothing. After he calmed down I told him that he can’t keep blaming being bipolar, that he should talk to his therapist about it and he essentially yelled at me, saying I was bullying him for his mental illness and calling me a bitch for not wanting to stick with him, saying he might not be alive if I left, even though I didn’t even say I wanted to leave I just wanted him to like figure out why this keeps happening. He said that if I stop flirting with other guys, and just be more pleasant and helpful when he’s manic or depressive, this wouldn’t happen. Is he right? He is really nice to me like literally 99 per cent and I really don’t know much about mental health, I’d really hate to be like making him worse. My best friend thinks he’s just using the mental health as an excuse but I think he’s really suffering, what do you think? Please be nice[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>> I don’t really want advice. I just want to tell someone. I have no one to tell the truth. I have a 6 month old and 2 others under 5, with my partner. I have been suffering from Post partum depression and anxiety. I’ll be honest, sometimes when I have a panic attack, I get uncontrollable. I have medication that takes a couple weeks to really help, but I still have my moments. Saturday was one of those moments. I yelled and yelled, and eventually i kicked a wall. The wall kick was the climax of my tantrum. As I’m walking out of the room, I hear him yell from behind me. I turn around and see him running out of the room after me. As soon as I could look at him straight, his hand was around my neck. He turned me around and then I felt his hand on the back of my head, in my hair. He pulled my hair back, to pull my head back, and wrapped his arm around my throat. He picked me up, and slammed me face first onto the hardwood floor. I can still hear the crack of my nose as it made impact. Once laying on the floor, he sat on my back, arm still around my throat. I couldn’t breathe. Everything I knew about fighting came to mind, and when I realized I couldn’t get air at all, no matter how much I wiggled, I just started tapping the floor. He didn’t stop. Frantically I started tapping his leg. He didn’t stop. I try once more on the floor. He didn’t stop. Finally, I just stopped tapping. At this point, all I can hear is my toddler’s screams. I didn’t have hardly any air left in my lungs to keep me conscious. He finally let go and walked away. I just laid on the floor to catch my breath. Eventually I made it to the bathroom. I thought I only had a nose issue. I guess I had a bruised nose, a giant lump above my eyebrow, and I bit through my tongue. A few hours later, I noticed my knees and hips were black and blue as well. It’s been 3 days, my jaw still hurts from where his arm was on my neck. My nose is still bruised. My wrist is sprained from the fall. I feel like I’ve been in a car accident. I’ve been with him for 4 years, and I would have never expected this. At all.. I didn’t even come at him physically. I was 6 ft away from him when I hit the wall.. I don’t know if I can move on from this.. he said he was just trying to “subdue” me. He was “just trying to put me to sleep.” I think he almost killed me. I’ve told everyone that I just fell while running up the stairs. Which explains all of my bruises pretty I feel so stupid. He may not have killed me, but a part of me died on that floor. I think that part was my self worth. I haven’t showered since. I can’t really even bring myself to look at him. Tonight I ordered pizza, because dinner just seemed to hard. I know he’s going to say something about that when he gets home. I have the means to leave, but I don’t know how to just leave my house and everything I’ve built. I’m so scared. I’m heartbroken. He has never laid an unsolicited hand on me before. Then this.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>My boyfriend and I got into an argument because I wanted to plan my day around studying for school. I’m in the nursing program so I HAVE to study everyday. He first got upset when I mentioned going to study tomorrow with my classmate. I tried to calm him down by saying I’d get everything I need to done still. He said I don’t need to study tomorrow since I did that today with my classmate. It got quiet and I decided to leave and go to the room to finish my hw and study. He came to the room and said “why are you doing this”. I told him all I want to do is study, it’s not that big a deal. So he said I have other priorities..when will I have time for him. He was having people come over so we decided to talk about it later. I slammed the door on our way out the bedroom, I’ll admit that was wrong. He then turned around and grabbed me by the shoulders and kept pushing me back. He didn’t push me into the wall..but it did scare me. He was also getting in my face and said “why the fuck are you slamming doors” . I went back into the room to get away from him and he followed me saying it wasn’t even hard I’m over exaggerating. He then apologized..I don’t buy it tho. I’m sorry if this isn’t the right sub.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I think I left my marriage before things got physically abusive. While angry, my husband has thrown food I was cooking at walls, broke a wooden door, and broke a glass shower door while I was still taking a shower. Is it true that “they hit things around you before they hit you”? He’s such a kind person otherwise. I’m a mess and can’t tell if I left a good person who needs to work through their anger issues, or if I left a situation that was bound to get a lot worse.[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>hey everyone. if anyone has had a restraining order hearing over zoom, what was it like? im wondering if i will see him[/INST]Legal</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I just got of an abusive relationship,and it been a very hard time for me, and i seem like I can't see my future so i wanna know people who had been thought an abusive relationship, what happened to you after? How do u get thought it and how u manage to put your life back together?[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>While I was pregnant my dad put his hands on me 2x. My daughter is 9 months now. I want to move out. It’s going to be hard but I can do it. He threatened to slap me over a damn charger I borrowed. Instead of asking me where I put his charger, he was on the phone talking shit about me to his girlfriend who is abusive to him just as he’s abusive to her. Just pray for me. I want my daughter to be somewhere where no one feels the need to threaten or get violent over disagreements.[/INST]Housing</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I think I may be being abused by my partner. I don’t want to give too much information and dox myself. I am a mother of 7. We’ve been together for 6 years. He wants more kids. It’s never enough. He expects me to do everything. Sometimes, when he comes home, if I don’t have the place perfect for him or the kids are too loud he threatens me and the children. He said if I don’t let him get me pregnant again he will kill me. I just gave birth last week, and he’s already saying we should have sex, which he has never dine before. He expects me to be okay by this weekend. He also won’t let me leave the house, unless he is not home but it’s hard with 4 kids under 4 with me. He has never hit me or my kids, but he threats to. He also ripped my car door off.[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I made a post a couple weeks back about a violent situation with my ex. He is in jail. I had been getting calls from him from jail, all reported. (I have a protective order). I have also gotten a couple calls from someone threatening me that I must get back with him, drop the charges, etc- I figured out how they are tied to him, but am unsure if I can prove/report that. I sent it along to the DA just in case. Regardless, it is obvious that a piece of paper won’t stop him. And even from jail, he is giving my info out. I am honestly really scared he’ll show up at home or at my work. I am wondering what I can do to protect myself. I have reached out to the local DV agency. I have put up cameras, and am thinking about changing cars, and moving. The police have flagged my address/number. What else can I do to stay safe? I feel a gun could backfire on me. Would a taser or mace be effective enough?? I just can’t go through what I did, again. Any advice is greatly appreciated[/INST]Safety planning</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Yesterday I left and today I am feeling very sad, devastated even. I know this is normal, I know that this is the hardest part but god does it suck doing the right thing sometimes. This is one of the hardest things i’ve had to do, because I never fell out of love with this person, I still love them so much but I had to realize that no matter how much or how hard I love them, they will not change and the abuse will be my future forever if I didn’t leave. I wish I didn’t want to crawl back in his arms but they’re the only ones that could console me right now, I won’t go back but it really sucks that I want to. Looking for some support, i’m having a really hard time with this breakup as I think I trauma bonded with him, I met him a few months after my mother passed, he’s all i’ve known since then, and now I just feel devastated and mad at the world, mad at him, why couldn’t he just treat me like a decent human? None of this had to happen, but he’s given me no choice but to leave, I won’t repeat my family cycles, I come from a traumatic childhood, I have repeatedly dated men who treat me just like my step father treated me my whole childhood, I know more now than I did when I first got sucked into this cycle, and now he’s gone from doing anything to reach out to me to being silent, because he knows it will cause my anxiety to stir and that I will yearn for him to reach out, it’s sick that I want him to reach out because it feels like some kind of connection, literally anything to make me feel better, but I will be strong and not do what i’ve done in the past which is reach out to him when he’s stopped reaching out to me, I feel so sad, I know if I can get past this month that I will be okay but god it sucks to even have to do this, I just wanted him to love me, I just wanted the bare minimum but he refused so I had no other option but to leave 💔[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>The domestic hotline told me that he wouldnt change and they told me that it will get worse...but he has been really nice to me now. He even got me a Christmas present which he has not done in a few years. I told him if he does it again that I will leave. He hasnt hit me, but just mentally and verbally abuses me. His dad hit his mom and I just found out that his brother hit his wife. He has been alot nicer to me now I just hope that it stays this way. Has anyone had an experience like this? Please let me know and give me any advice[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I was in an abusive marriage for ten years and left about 4 years ago. I spent a lot of time by myself, becoming independent and healing as fully as I could before I started dating again. While dating, I met many liars and abusive men and spotted red flags a mile away and felt safe in my own awareness and willingness to walk away. I met a guy 2 years ago, we got on really well and became really close over the first or second Covid lockdown. He lives 60 miles away so the relationship has mostly been long distance and visiting each other once or twice a week. He is an immigrant so there are a huge number of cultural differences that have been both amazing and challenging. One of the really apparent issues is that his culture is fundamentally sexist with the general belief that women are owned by men. He, himself, does not agree with this but sometimes his actions demonstrate that that belief is in there somewhere. We had a horrible experience this weekend and it’s making me see everything in a strange light and now my memories of red flags are coming flooding into my mind. I’m going to list them. This weekend. He got jealous over something and I spent some time trying to reassure him. I put my head on his knee and he tapped his knuckles on my head 5 times. I immediately said “I didn’t like that” and he kept insisting he didn’t hit me hard enough to hurt me. I kept telling him that he did, because it hurt. We ended up in a huge fight with my screaming and crying, demanding he leave because he refused to apologise and gaslighted me to my face, obviously it was hard enough to hurt me because I was hurt. The next day I got serious neck injury, I can’t think about any cause other than him hitting the back of my head. I told him I thought that was why my neck hurt and he started laughing at me. I told him my dad didn’t find it funny and was concerned, and he shouted at me for “running to my dad saying I hit you” I’m like, you did though? I have ended up doubting myself because I had been drinking and because he is so adamant. It makes me feel sick to question myself like that, it’s starting to make me feel dissociative and panicky. A few months ago we went through a break up (we’re not really bf and gf, more like casual relationship) and didn’t talk for 2 weeks. He came to my house to drop off a present and I happened to have a male friend over at the time, we were just chatting and playing guitar. My ex dropped the present off, drove away and then came back 20 mins later. He knocked on the door and I answered it and we had a brief chat. He later told me he was planning on storming in and “catch” us having sex. This was enormous alarm bells to me that he felt entitled to come into my house and “catch” me doing anything. I believe he talks about me in his native language with his friends but I can’t understand what he’s saying. But sometimes I’ll know he’s talking about me on the phone, there will be some backwards and forwards and laughing, and then the convo will move on. If I ask what was said he will say something simply like “my friend asked how you are and I said you were ok” and I don’t believe that he’s telling the truth because what I heard was more words and more humourless/banter back and forth than what he’s reporting. Obviously I can’t prove it. I asked if his friends have a nickname for me (he said they do for everyone) and he smirked and then refused to tell me, then said I was imagining that he smirked and they didn’t have any nicknames for me. The whole thing turned into a fight when it didn’t have to. During sex he is sometimes inappropriate. He has recorded me doing stuff then lied when I noticed and said he didn’t record anything, and was just watching me on the selfie camera but not recording. I’m not the kind of person to rip someone’s phone out of their hand so I can’t prove it. But even that I feel is an invasion of my privacy. He has also blatantly disrespected my direct withdrawal consent, even penetrating me with his fingers when I’ve specifically told him not to, touching parts of my body when I’ve specifically told him not to. Part of the problem of why I can’t decide what’s going on (even though I’m reading back over that and it’s obviously wrong) is because my marriage was SO abusive that this seems mild in comparison. I also have PTSD and tend to forget triggers immediately. I have forgotten entire days and conversations immediately after they happen and it takes months before I recall them. As a result, so much of what he does is forgotten the second he’s nice to me. And thirdly, this guy love bombs me so much that I’ve become to depend on him a little for finances and for pepping me up. But I have felt like a stranger in my own body for a year now and I’m beginning to think he is the cause of this disconnect.[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>My ex who I have a restraining order messaged my mom, my birthday is soon and they messaged her asking if she could ask me if it'll be okay for him to being me gifts and that he just wants ti hear my voice one more time, how he will never forgive himself for hurting me. The first time he messaged my mom in December (a week after the order) asking her to ask me to call him because he was going to kill himself and wanted to apologize (he never did and I never called) He sounds genuine but I no longer believe he could ever be genuine. He's never apologized until he was arrested for hitting me. To be honest I have this gut feeling he's trying to get me to call him so the order gets voided since I broke it and I put it on him. Should I report him to the police? Idk of bes genuine or not but I don't believe he has an honest or kind bone in his body. What should I do?[/INST]Police</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Two night ago my now ex-boyfriend knocked me off my feet, bent over and choked me, then started punching me in the face leaving me with multiple bruises, splitting my lip and knocking out my front tooth. He left right after so when the cops came he wasn’t around. This was the final straw. My mom flew out, we are in the process of getting a restraining order in place and the detective is working on getting a warrant for his arrest. He laid low for a few days but last night and this morning he keeps calling over and over and texting over and over. He has been sleeping in his car without a change of clothes and he is trying to come back to my house (I own the home solo) to use the shower and want to talk to me. I am holding strong and not allowing it, no answering his calls, keeping it short and brief with a text message saying he can come by in a 30min window to pick up his stuff outside on the sidewalk. The police will be here at that time. We just finished packing his stuff into trash bags. Holding strong. This is so hard. I loved him with all my heart. He permanently disfigured me. I’m holding strong. Edit: Good news all!! He has officially been arrested. He has to sit in jail all weekend and he will be in front of a judge on Monday at which time the restraining order will be put in place. I’m so relieved.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>How do you finally get the courage to be done? How do you ensure your own as well as your kids safety? Has he come after you? Who did you have support from? How did the kids handle the change? How are you doing now?[/INST]Childbearing</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I kicked him out early last year. He was physically, mentally, sexually abusive. His number and fb has been blocked since then. I didn't hear anything for about a year from him nor did I contact him. I received a message from a different fb account with his name recently which was in my "spam folder" in fb. &amp;#x200B; It says: "Hi. \[insert my name\]. Since leaving you I have gotten my stuff together. I have 3 full time jobs, a car and I'm in a better place. Sorry for abandoning you. How have you and your cat been.?" He also then went onto my fb posts and started "hearting" photo. &amp;#x200B; I find it strange that he's even still looking at my fb. I also doubt the full time job thing as he wouldn't take out rubbish, let alone get a job while he lived with me. All he would do was drink, smoke weed, play games and abuse me. When I kicked him out he went and lived with his mum. &amp;#x200B; Why even update me? What's the point in sending that message? Why after a year? I didn't respond. I didn't ask nor care what he's doing. I don't want anything to do with him. Just blocked him instantly on that account as well.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I’ve been married 2.5 years. When we were dating before he was really kind at first and then yes he started showing his true colors. He becomes a completely different person when he is angry like his body starts convulsing and shaking and he says and does the most horrid things. He first started throwing things at me, TV remote water bottle - and I spoke to his parents about it and they just brushed it off. After we got married - I’ve been hit maybe 5 times… not strangled or slapped but like pushed to the ground. Manhandled kicked and pinched until my mid section bruised. I can’t speak to anyone at all about this… I have no place to vent and if anything no one will believe that my husband is capable because to everyone else he’s the most fun most charismatic guy… I have told him I won’t tolerate it but he did it again. We are traveling right now and he pushed me to the ground in the club and dragged me by my hair outside yelling and cursing at me.. so many people told him to stop but he didn’t. What do I do? I have no support. I just want to make him realize I’m a good wife…[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I (20f) finally got the courage, prepared for whatever to come, and had the “this needs to change, if this happens again our five month old son and I are leaving” talk with my fiancé (25m). He refused to see everything I explained saying either he didn’t remember doing/saying that or asking when something he did/said happened. He’d say that he is just really stressed out and doesn’t know why, started asking me why he would be. He’d say that he needs help, even after I kept telling him that his family and I have given him all the advice and help that we can—that he is the only one that can help himself now. He told me that if he doesn’t let out “small violent urges” like slamming, throwing, or breaking things while yelling at our son, me, or just in general then how is he supposed to get out the anger. He said that if he lets it all build up then it’ll get bad bad when he explodes and that I “don’t want that to happen.” Near the end of it he had turned himself into the victim and made me the villain. He kept saying things like no one cares what he thinks or how he feels, that I don’t give his parenting opinions a chance (I’m not comfortable with us drinking around our son or spanking him as discipline, which he’s a violent drunk and knows he’ll take spanking too far), that no one helps him, etc. I told him that we do care, we always express interest and we have actively given him all the advice we can, and that we are tired of doing everything for him so we’ve stopped he doesn’t clean up after himself or do any basic household chores. I told him that I need a partner and our son needs a father, and that I would like to be loved nicely. He proceeded to say that he doesn’t understand or see how he doesn’t treat me nicely and that he’s doing what he can to be good to our son. So it just circled all the way back around to the beginning, explaining everything that has been done and said. It ended with him only apologizing once. What did he apologize for? “What do you want me to say? I’m sorry I’m not a good person.” So I stuck to the whole point of the conversation and said one more time, “If things don’t change, if you do any of those things one more time, then we need to take a break.” And I started to go out to sit in my car, he asked where I was going. I told him that I needed to be alone. He responded with, “I don’t want to be left alone with myself.” I’ve been through that stupid ass tactic before with a couple of friends, it wasn’t happening again. I stuck to going to sit in my car. I sat out there for 20 minutes trying to get ahold of a friend and breathe. I came back in and he was already fast asleep snoring. Woke up and he’s been acting like nothing happened, like what he usually does after we have serious discussions or arguments. He said he was sorry about staying so late at his parents over the water heater issue, said “you’re mine, aren’t you?” and “I’m terrified of losing you”, started kissing all over me, and tried initiating sex. I have given up at this point. That was my last chance at trying to talk to him. I think this relationship is pretty much over and he is just avoiding it. I don’t know what to do anymore. Any advice or outlook on this would be helpful, but also thank you for listening.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>On January 24, after three weeks of love bombing, I called him out for something I didn’t agree with. He got angry and issued two slaps to my face, I kept telling him to have sympathy on me. He then poured orange juice over me and all over the house which I had just cleaned, I refused to stay quiet and he then poured soap on me. I spent the next hour and a half cleaning up as he laughed and said this was what I deserved, all while seven months pregnant. The next day, after hours and hours of crying and stressing myself out, I felt very sick and had bad pelvic pain. I asked him to take me to the hospital because I didn’t feel well, he claimed I was the girl who cried wolf. I repeatedly said please just take me, he refused. I then simply took a cab into the hospital to get myself and baby checked out. While in the hospital, my abuser continued spewing hate. He mentioned how he wishes the child would die so that he could get a second shot or how he would leave me if she came out mentally ill from all the stress “I put on her”. How a man could spew such hate while a woman is in the hospital is beyond me. Baby and I are fine, thank god. How do you walk away from this? All while seven months pregnant? Do abuse victims ever ask what you did to deserve this life to begin with?[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Hi there. First time posting here &amp; honestly I'm not sure how I feel. My case against my ex husband has been "cold" since Covid started. Long story short, I married my highschool sweetheart, he was an amazing partner until, well, he decided to take the mask off 5 years in.. He was a cheater, and abused me verbally, emotionally, physically and sexually. Raped me often and I reported it over and over, but they said they couldn't force charges against someone I was married to. Countless police reports and calls, and they let him go Everytime. Because of his job, He has strong ties within the community and law enforcement. They over looked everything.. when I finally got away from him, the stalking began. He even broke into my home and had placed hidden GoPro cameras in my bedroom. He threatened to kill me and our children often and even bragged to others about it. He escalated and escalated. Finally in 2017, I escaped him safely with my children. The threats and stalking continued, and in 2018 a detective took my case and started looking into things. Unfortunately, she did nothing with it and actually told me there's no evidence of anything and closed my case. I've been devastated, forced to co parent with my abuser and rapist and he's out here living his best life above the law, not being held accountable for anything. I was depressed, suffering with debilitating PTSD, I eventually had to move on because life continues, right? It had to. I actually got remarried, and I'm expecting a new baby with my husband, I'm doing well despite the fact that I'm still forced to coparent with this terrible man and have had to call DCF multiple times over things he's done to my children. Like always, he gets away with it. Today, out of nowhere, I get a call. A new detective wants to reopen my cold case and start investigating to push over to the state attorney's office for charges. I'm dumbfounded. I'm meeting with her next week to go over everything. I'm honestly all over the place with emotions. Thankfully I have it all in a box that I've kept in my attic. Police reports, images of injuries, witness statements. I just don't know what to think or what I'm supposed to expect. I just want justice. But I'm scared.[/INST]Legal</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Hi, I am 31F and my bf is 37M, we have been together for 3 years. We are currently LDR due to the pandemic. He had a porn addiction in the past (which he claims to have gotten over, but I obviously have my doubts) as there has been no intimacy per say in 20 months. As far as I know there is no infidelity and he has never given me any reason to believe so, he has been very good at being transparent with his life with me. Obviously due to the lack of his sexual interest towards me (and comparing my body to exes in the past, stating the just preffered athletic body types like theirs more and had to get used to mine. Making comments about my weight, indicating I was fat when I'm not. I'm 105lbs and his exes weighed 50lbs more than me and never worked out so the athletic part is still a mystery) we have gotten into a lot of fights as my needs weren't being met. A year ago I saw he was following a lot of women he didn't know on instagram and liking their pictures. I was deeply upset because he had rejected my pictures in the past saying they make him "uncomfortable" and shows no lust towards me, but does to other women. I told him I don't believe his addiction has stopped and I found this behaviour disrespectful. He unfollowed them all and since then I thought things were ok, but a year later... I see he is adding women again for the past month he doesn't know again but not on insta, but facebook. As if he thought I wouldn't notice. They're all in different countries, very poor, living in slums by what looks like it and the most concerning part is that all of them are underage, I'm talking about 30+ girls way under 18. Also a month ago we had a big fall out where he tried to break up with me cause he says he feels "anxiety" when I text him because we fight so much, but he changed his mind 5 days later claiming he decided he does love me. A week after this incident he changed our relationship status on facebook went from public, to friends only. It was the only thing that confirmed our relationship publicly (took me a year to ask him to please change it) as he hasn't got one single picture of me on his facebook after 3 years (yet he has hundreds of pics of his exes and was with them a shorter period of time) and he would go out of his way to take pictures excluding me. I haven't brought this up with him as I was scared of another fight and being dumped on the spot again for bringing up a concern. While I don't think he is a cheater, this behaviour certainly doesn't bode well with me and is making me believe he is capable of it due to not respecting boundaries. I feel ashamed, humiliated, disrespected and worthless. He knows that it was important to me to have us showing as in a relationship on social media, he knows it is important to me he doesn't add women just cause he fancies them (it's disrespectful) and given how I have been treated it sure doesn't help my self esteem. I'm an attractive woman, I am a model. If I wasn't attractive I wouldn't be hired, but he sure is treating me like I'm not good enough. He even said I'm the most attractive woman he has ever been with. I want to bring this up with him again one last time, but the problem is that he is extremely defensive and threatens to either end the relationship on the spot so I get scared and become compliant or he screams and shouts at me and I'm scared of that happening too. I don't like that I have been keeping quiet about this for a month due to fear of his defensiveness, but I do need to communicate and talk about it. If he acts like a jerk then so be it, but I just wanna do it right and have a normal civil conversation in a curious way, heck knows maybe I'm misinterpreting things and there could be a reason to this? I don't know, is there anything I can say that would be less likely to get a defensive response and for me to stand tall? If it doesn't work obviously I will have to walk away, I just believe a conversation is necessary. Sorry for the long post and thank you to whoever read this, I appreciate you. TL;DR: Bf is following underage girls on social media and is usually very defensive if I ask any questions or have concerns about the relationship, how can communicate this to him in a calm healthy way? \*Is this DV? I'm worried, I was sent here after all\*[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Has anyone wondered if the abuse may not have happened if the person wasn't under the influence? In my situation my ex was under the influence of cocaine and alcohol a lot of the times he was abusive... he claims he wouldn't have done those things if he was sober. But I pointed out to him he was still mentally and physically abusive even sober. Or is it another way for the abuser to not take responsibility??[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Why I feel getting hit is my fault?[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>im stuck in this weird place where when im with him i want him to leave i want to break up, but when we actually are broken up i can’t stomach it and just go back. then i go back and i just want to leave again and the cycle keeps going. i need advice or just any suggestions at all.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>How bad does it have to get before it's considered an abusive relationship? I see some of the stories here and I feel ashamed even wondering if what happened to me was abuse. I have been shoved and pinned down for less than a minute. These types of incidents only happened 3 times over the course of 2 years. My bf was drunk every time. I have never been hit. I dont think he would ever do that. He apologized right after every incident. How far does it have to go until it's abuse? I have never been in a relationship before this so I don't have anything to compare it to. I'm hoping he'll stop because I told him I can't stand it anymore and he promised he would. My hope is that nothing like that happens again because I don't want to be in an abusive relationship.[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>My abuser is currently in prison waiting for his hearing. I am waiting for my no contact order to go thro. But in the mean time he is still sending me letters....aggressive letters that are intimidating and full of lies...accusing me of being the abuser and I should be in jail. Yesterday I received a horrible letter from him with roses. I'm trying to figure out what to do? Keep letters and use as evidence or send them back to sender using my stamp. I want as much evidence as possible to put him away. But I also am feeling depressed and fed up with life after reading his mean letters. Any advice on what to do with his letters?? BTW he is claiming I AM HARASSING HIM in his latest letter. Which I am not!!. He calls me from prison a hundred times a day (when they're not on covid lock down) and he writes me 2 or 3 letters a day. I don't answer his calls and I don't write him back .[/INST]DV report procedure/Documentation</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I called one today in my city and they have me the green light to come in. They told me they allow men even though it’s a women’s shelter which is concerning. There also seems to be a lot of rules and it’s very strict. I don’t have anywhere to go and I don’t want to stay in the abusive household.[/INST]Shelters/ DV center/ Agency</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>So literally just 30 min ago, he came to my room for no reason other than to attack me. He grabs a broom, hits the wall on purpose to provoke me to get up, and if I do try to close the "door", he spits on me. He then proceeds to run away. Both of my parents were here, my Mother *sometimes* stops him if I threaten to call the police. My father just ignores that I exist. I am financially bankrupt so my only choice is to live here or run away and be homeless. I am getting a job probably this week, and my first priority is to move out. My "door", is knobless, so he can go in and enter whenever he feels like it. My dad bought a new one but is too lazy to install it, and I have to *beg* him to install or or else he never does. I have no idea how to do so myself, so I am constantly threatened, and whenever he does attack he gets away with it with no problem. His build is slighly taller despite being younger so he has a wide range of attacks, my only option really is to just barricade the door, but he can just easily push through it and attack me. He has attacked my sister once and has gotten baker acted, I really don't want to do that again as it puts financial stress on my parents and then they *blame* me for being innocent. It's a messed up family dynamic, and I am constantly fuming with anger, which affects not only my college life but social life and everything. I am frequently outside my house for that very reason. TL;Dr: violent agressive younger sibling, and indifferent parents, vs me who does nothing to provoke them except try to get profit and ratain my sanity within my bedroom. Edit: Does anyone know a DIY trick that would allow me to have a "fake door" if it is knobless? I feel like that would be a temporary solution, not the *best* but better than nothing? Like for example, could I tie a string or something that would close the "door" shut? I am just brainstorming. I do not like to call the police because this is considered a "trivial" matter, and I get sh*it* for it. I'd rather do things my own way and move out when I can.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Does anyone coparent with their abuser? It’s been awful for me, I find it best when there is zero to little communication. I have been doing this for years and he still tries to manipulate me and he manipulates the children. Constantly talks bad about me to the kids. When I do talk to him it’s constant verbal abuse and disrespect. I know it sounds horrible but It makes me question if it’s worth my mental health. Sometimes I feel like running away. I just want to know how some of you cope with this, if there’s a way to cope.[/INST]Childbearing</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I'm unsure if this is the right place to ask, and I feel stupid asking the internet for help. But I can't stand it. I'll keep this short, here goes. My older sister threatens to throw things at me. And sometimes, she actually does. This has been happening since we were kids. I can't pinpoint exactly what's wrong or what makes her do it. Here is my attempt at explaining the situation: When I tell the truth, she always says I'm lying and denies that I'm being truthful. She keeps saying she's right and I'm wrong. If i speak against that or explains, she gets angry. And says that because she's older I should never talk back. I find this obnoxious. Then it suddenly escalates. She starts threatening to throw things at me if I keep "talking back" (i.e. explaining, mere sounds, even apologizing is talking back). So I shut up and let her lecture me about why I'm such a bad person and about the situation. And it doesn't stop there. After all that she asks a question, for example, "do you understand?". If i answer silence she gets angry. If i don't give her an answer she likes, she gets angry. If i do tell her what she wants to hear, then she finally stops. And expects that i will still obey her orders since im younger. Is this a normal sibling interaction? Or am i just screwed up like my sister says i am? I can delete this post if it sounds dumb.[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Hello, i am new to this my ex who i have a order of protection against was arrested Thursday because he broke in my house and tried to force me to sleep with him. The DA wants me to come to there office today w my security camera footage on a hard drive. What questions should I ask them?[/INST]Legal</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>So I just need to vent or see if anyone else dealt with this situation. I left an abusive relationship all my friends knew it was told me I need to leave they even witnessed it. In the end I found out they were talking badly about me to my abuser and started choosing the abusers side so I eventually cut them all off because it hurt so bad to know all those people I did anything for ended up being extremely fake and choosing to stay friends with my abuser even tho they have all talked shit about each other. I have trust and abandonment iusses now with making friends and I have actually not made anymore friend do to this it is almost to years now. Why do people do that chose the abuser over the victim? It's confusing and I don't understand why? This is my first ever post on Reddit so bare with me 😭[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>My ex and I are still living together while he finds other housing with a friend he plans to live with. Today, he decided to get drunk, and since he was drunk he wanted to turn the heat up in the house. I'm the one paying the bill, so I asked him not to, and he did so anyway. I'm currently trying to save money on bills, so that worst case scenario my daughter and I can get another apartment if he decides he no longer wants to leave. He went to go play his music and so when it got hot, I turned the heat off, he saw me do it, and he used his body to push me out of the way so that he could turn the heat back on, then he proceeded to remove the thermostat from the wall so I'd have no way to change it. After this I decided the safest thing was to take our daughter into the bedroom and lock the door, especially as he was stumbling around and trying to pick her up. He started begging for a blanket and like an idiot I fell for it. He pushed his way in after telling me he was "tired of my shit" he decided to take my bed, instead of the sofa where we agreed he'd sleep, as my daughter is used to sleeping on the bed with me. Is this considered abuse? Him pushing me? He told me its not because he didn't bruise me nor did he use his hands to do it, only his body.[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I am a 26F and have been married to my boyfriend of six years since a little bit more than a moth now. (We have never lived together before marriage) During this month, we had our ups and downs as I heard that this is a normal thing when you move in with someone let alone get married to them. We share bills and are fine with that we have equal responsibilities I think but I am the one who always cooks, and for him to do things as I want to I always have to repeat myself many times at a time to get heard, almost like with a kid. During this month we had two major fights, and I am starting to ask myself if it is domestic abuse or not. During the fights I always yell because he provocantes me with words he knows I can’t stand, and after I start yelling he becomes crazy, because he already told me many times that his boundary is yelling and that if I yell at him I shouldn’t expect him to behave well or talk to me respectfully. He always tries to leave when the fights get too hot and I can’t stand someone ignoring my talking and leaving after they set me on fire, I feel like I am the one who pushes his buttons too far by not letting him leave. But then when he doesn’t leave he starts hitting the walls, threatening to hit me, grabbing me very hard from the wrists and even pushing me. He threatened many times of killing me or hitting me if I don’t stop talking but I can’t stop talking when I still have things to say. He says horrible things to me like calling me crazy and threatening to kick me out or to leave and never coming back again knowing that I told him many times that I can’t stand it and it is a red line for me. One time when I tried to make him talk to me by physically trying to prevent him from getting out from the room, he accidentally hit me very hard at the face trying to leave nevertheless and I had a black eye for a few days after that I feel like I am the one who gets him to the state of hitting walls and banging things everywhere, partially by not being able to control myself and yell at him during fights so I don’t know wether or not it is domestic violence at this state or not. I can’t talk about it to friend and family because I feel like there is no coming back after that and I am scared of being the one who provoques it and the idea of telling people about it makes me feel like I am lying. I feel really desperate after fights like this occur and lost knowing that I have never experienced that with him before marriage and that his behavior towards me changed completely after marriage and that he seems to expect me to be a lot more submissive now that we are married.[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Hello guys, I am 29. My father who is 61 constantly beats my mum even though she is a cancer patient. He never cares about what other people feel. When I raise my voice against him, he says its none of my business. He is basically a clear psychopath who is addicted to alcohol. I also suspect he is weak with women and has external affairs. Being in constant stress over the past 10 years, lead to me developing psoriasis and got me into depression. I am planning to move out of my country to study abroad and take my mum with me. Please guide on how to survive until then because he constantly beats me up too. He has even bitten me once and spit on my face. I am trying to be patient as much as possible but its wearing out. I have developed anxiety and depression because of him. Any advice/tips/life lessons on how to face this situation and handling it will be much helpful to me.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Yesterday he pulled me hair out beat my face for the first time and left marks. Im never allowed to process the abuse because hes too tied up in “feeling bad” and I have to comfort him. Hes my first boyfriend we started dating when I was 16 im now 23 turing 24 soon. I have nothing to my name not true friends not true family fhat cares. His family supports his abuse to me and only care to tell him to stop because hell go to jail. Not because hes hurting another human. This is the first time im telling anyone anything. Because im on the verge of disappearing from this earth. Im scared and tired. And I feel like its all my fault. Hes even a year younger than and that makes me feel worse about the situation. I have a little sister and I feel like ill never ba able to be a good role model for her because of what I put up with. I just feel defeated. Sorry if this is a ramble or not allowed. I just need help. I have along history of being abused. Sexually from a sibling for years. Emotionally abused when I came out about the trauma.And almost immediately after that I got into the worst relationship of my life and feel like I have to stay because he financially supported me. I feel in debt.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>TL;DR: my gf has physically and verbally abused me for a long time, it’s escalated recently, and now I’m finally leaving and I’m not telling her. I feel I need to post this to remind myself why I need to leave. I (M 28) am leaving my GF (F 26) tomorrow morning after 3.5 years. After speaking to 3 individual therapists myself, and working with a couple’s therapist with her I can’t take the verbal abuse anymore. I’m leaving tomorrow morning and I’m not telling her. Here are some the highlights (or low lights) of the abuse. About 7 months ago, when her grandma in another country passed, she spent the whole week drowning her sadness in liquor. She’d blacked out and at about 2 or 3 in the morning taken my keys to go driving. I tried to stand behind the car and stop her and she accelerated at me. I got in front of the car to try to get her attention and she drove forward towards me. This to cap off a week of her saying she could wait until MY grandma died so she could treat me as shitty as I was treating her. (I was physically unable to take off of work and I still tried to comfort her, but that wasn’t enough.) I had, and still do have a lot of sympathy for what she was dealing with, but I didn’t deserve that, I really tried to be a good partner. About 5 months ago she locked me out of the Airbnb we were staying at around midnight returning from seeing my friends. She was piss drunk and angry at me for trying to stop her from taking their dog outside without a leash who was notorious for trying to run away. I went to a hotel that night, and she spent the night berating me by text and voicemails. My friend came with me to get my stuff the next day, and she spent the whole time begging me not to leave, swearing she would change. I stayed away for a week and eventually caved after convincing me she would change, and somehow making it partially my fault with something else she was mad about. 3 months ago - at my parent’s house no less - she drinks herself into a stupor. She gets angry at me because I tell her to stop trying to pin me in the bathroom so she can berate me for telling her I didn’t appreciate her calling me names and berating me that night. I go to walk past her, and she punches me in the stomach, leaving a small cut where had been holding chopsticks or something. I got very angry and yelled how dare you hit me, my parents naturally over hear and try to diffuse the situation without escalation. Eventually we go to separate rooms, but she spends the night berating me about how she didn’t punch me, I’m dramatic, etc. Fast forward to the past two weeks- she spends a car ride back to my family’s house berating me, leaving a house party we were invited to with family I had in town. At my family’s house, tries to force me to have sex with her by pinning me, and then eventually storming out when I refuse, driving drunk to go back to where we were staying at the time at about 3 - 4 in the morning. This continued through the week, drinking through the week nights, berating me about something. Finally in our couple’s therapy session i bawl my eyes out telling her to fix her drinking etc, and eventually she tells me it’s my fault for drinking because I wasn’t happy or hype enough. At this point, my individual therapist had told me about the cycle of abuse, so that softened it and helped me not internalize it. Then today, after leaving brunch with a couple friend we met, she proceeds to berate me in our Uber for not making sure she brought her mask with her. I was only thinking about myself, etc. we get back and she strikes up a conversation with a random neighbor we’ve never seen, we talk like it’s all good, as the conversation dies down I suggest we go check on our dog. We walk away and then in the house she gets angry with me telling me I made her look like a fool. At this point I’d had it. I went to the room and locked the door so she couldn’t get in. She eventually came and knocked on the door and demanded I let her in. I did, but told her I had nothing to talk about with her, she said how dare you lock the door to our room, don’t ever do that again. She comes and lays in the bed and falls asleep. I’ve been packing my things since secretly, and I’m leaving for good this time. Family is picking me up early in the morning and I don’t plan to tell her. I’m finally going to stand up for myself, and I’m not coming back. I feel I need to post this to remind myself why I need to leave.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I've left a decade long physically, emotionally, financially and psychologically abusive relationship. What does healing even look like? What were/are your goals? I understand physically healing - I have a dentist appointment to have some teeth fixed/replaced with implants. I got some hair growth serum to help with bald spots where my hair was ripped out. Etc. But what does emotional healing look like? If anyone has any tangible ideas/goals, I'd be very grateful! I just feel numb.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I made the choice to have my cat of 16 years put down last night. She was so sick and so tired. My ex-husband and I adopted her when we got engaged and moved in together. When things got bad between us she would sit on my lap and try to make me feel better. On nights when he would tear through the house destroying things and coming after me, she and I would cuddle up on the bathroom floor and hide until morning. She's very easily the reason I am here now still alive finally out of that hell. I miss her and I am grateful for her and I don't know how to keep going without her still here.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Me (24F) and my boyfriend (27M) have been together for 3 years. We have a one year old together and I am currently expecting our second. I’ve been a stay at home mom up until about two weeks ago. I started to be really drained and depressed from the pregnancy hormones and really needed a break from watching my child 24/7. I finally found a daycare that I love and It’s been nice because my son gets to hang out with other babies for about 4 hours everyday, while I either relax or work on other business plans. I’ve really seen a uplift in my mood since I’ve been getting a break. Yesterday, my boyfriend told me he feels as though our child getting into daycare was a waste of time and money, since I’m not working and don’t do anything but sit on social media while he’s there. I tried to explain that it was deeper than that, and even agreed to get a job if that would make more sense. We argued and I began crying because hormones I guess and frustration, he was upset I was crying an poured out the coffee he bought me. I asked why he did that and he said “because I paid for it” so in retaliation, I poured his cup out and asked him how that felt. In response he raised his hand like he was going to hit me but instead filled a cup with warm water and threw it in my face in front of our son. I was stunned but am not sure if this is a big deal. I can’t believe he would do this to me in front of our one year old. Is this the start to a relationship that’s destined to get violent?[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I think my problem right now is I have more compassion than I do sense. I love him so much, and I know he's hurting. But I also can't help but feel manipulated, I just can't get my anger to the surface. It's always pushed down by my ever-present urge to protect him and not be mean. After a week of no contact, he called me. It was an emotional conversation. He desperately wants to come home. But I can't let him, we're not good for each other. Like we're werewolves and each other's full moons. I have to protect myself and our pets. But I don't want to be heartless. I don't want to keep his dogs from him. But I can't let him come home -- we'll settle into our old ways and co-dependence. I just don't know if I have the strength to turn him down completely. He promised to go to therapy and anger management, and I hope he does. But I want him to do it for himself, not for me. Otherwise, it will never truly be him. But I still don't know if I trust him to go. It's so complicated. I want him to feel loved and protected, but I know I'm not the right person for it. I wish I could believe he could change, that this should be his wake-up call. I'm also scared that flat-out rejection will result in him hurting himself. He's proven he's capable of that. I'm hurting, I know he's hurting. Is it even possible to continue loving him at distance or is the healthiest option truly to completely cut off contact and let the chips fall where they may? Honestly, the potential outcomes keep me up at night. **EDIT:** He's trying to force me into making a decision and the only options are to let him come back home or he's going to pursue doctor-assisted suicide. I want him to make the choice to live and try to live a better life for himself. I can't let him come home - I don't feel safe with him here, but telling him no is (in his mind) telling him to die. I don't know what to do. I've told him a million times even if I was willing to take him back one day after I saw real change, that day wasn't today. And because, after only a week since he left, I'm not willing to confirm there's a future for us, he's not willing to do any sort of self-improvement. I regret picking up the phone again. I wasn't ready for this, and he's clearly breaking. My heart hurts for him. This rock and hard place situation has no winners.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I went to the police today after my ex slammed me to the ground and put me in a choke hold, leaving me with swollen/bruised face, knees, legs, and hands. They told me because there was no “verbal threat” they couldn’t do anything…[/INST]Police</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I know the relationship sucked. But I miss the good parts, and the feeling of being that close to someone. So badly. I know he was a master of manipulation, but it felt like he knew me so well. We had similar taste in everything and he knew how to make me happy or how to make me feel so loved (when he wanted). I'm over him, believe me, but God do I miss the good relationship feelings. It's been so long since I felt love and passion for someone. I've been with my new boyfriend for one year. And he's great! He treats me well, we get along well... but we aren't super passionate. We don't have all the same interests, not always this insane connection (though I know that's an unrealistic expectation in a healthy relationship). I do not feel in love with him, and I feel like it's because that part of my brain has been fried. I've given it time, hoping it will grow. But it's like I hit a wall. Normally I'd think it's me just not that into him type of situation. I have every reason to love this guy and swoon over him, but I just don't. I'm happy in my relationship, but I feel like I'm not as happy as I could be.. as if undying, passionate, take a bullet for you type love will never happen for me again. Anyone else experience similar? Does it get better?[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I’ve been at the DV shelter w my kids 3 weeks now. My abuser takes care of the kids while I work. I can’t completely cut him off. I’ve never been worried about him around the kids. Anyway he is trying to see me on Valentine’s Day “for 1 last time alone” I felt like it would be okay at first but I’m starting to think I probably shouldn’t because we would actually be alone. He could try to hurt me. Idk. It’s hard still being in constant contact w your abuser.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>So I couldn’t stay while finding somewhere else to live and left last Wednesday while he was at work and am living at a cheap holiday house place with my kids. I keep getting rejected for rental properties as there is a rental crisis at the moment here, so I’m feeling a bit down. He called today and said I can have the rental we shared and he will leave, all I have to do is withdraw my DV paperwork and go back on the lease. Along with all the “I didn’t realise what I had until it’s gone, you’re beautiful, I love you” BS. I felt bad in my gut so I stayed strong and said no. And then he started yelling again. Goes to show, a leopard does not change their spots - they are only “nice” when they want to or are getting their way. Please send positive vibes my way that I can get accepted for an apartment in the next 7 days. Stay strong.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>My ex lies for attention, either to impress people or to play the victim. He lies to rewrite history. He lies to win arguements. He lies to gaslight. And he lies to everyone without feeling bad for lying. I can only imagine that this was what is called compulsive lying. I think he sometimes repeats lies enough that he starts to believe his own lies. Does it have to be intentional to be considered abusive?[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Update: I read everyone's advice. Thank you so much. I packed up his essential stuff and asked him to give me some space for a few days (this gave me some wiggle-room). He begged, guilt tripped, and yelled to try to get me to reconsider, but I stood firm. He's been staying with his parents. I still have finances to disentangle and I still have all of his furniture, but he's out of the house and I feel like I can finally breathe again. original post: I'm want to kick out the guy im engaged to. He's controlling towards me/ wont let me work and puts me in debt, always yelling and screaming. I want to kick him out. He's not on the lease, and I think he'd be legally entitled to 60 days notice. Does anyone have advice on what I can do?[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Awaiting trial, he's been in prison since April, another bail application hearing tomorrow and I know it's irrational to predict the future on the basis of a feeling, but I have a bad feeling. If he's released, I'm torn between wanting to go into DV emergency accommodation because I'm afraid he'll kill me, staying put because I hope he'll kill me or deluding myself into believing I can reboot us somehow but without all the torture this time around. I have zero people in my life. I'm going to spend Christmas alone. I don't even care about Christmas, but it's the principle of not having the option of participation. I feel so miserable I've gone back to almost believing I need him.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>The real culprit is within the walls of family law. The court system, the Children’s Division, police, etc. (&amp; it doesn’t matter what city/county you reside - it’s all crooked)…they all perpetuate the problem. Until there’s a total overhaul of the “system”, DV will never end. It will only continue to get worse. Never forget that (&amp; never trust anyone in the system - ever).[/INST]Legal</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>i been taking care of my grandma since her husband died in 2016, paying bills, keeping the house standing, yard and house work, food in the house, the whole 9 yards, only to be met with verbal abuse daily, i do nothing but help out around here and get nothing but disrespect in return, if i move out, she loses the house because she cant physically do it anymore, she suffered a small stroke a couple years ago and cant do numbers/cant pay her own bills, let alone anything else, she treats me like a personal slave, what should i do?[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I’m really scared to go to one, but I don’t know how much longer I can take this. How bad are they? Are the people nice? Do they help with job placement? Any personal experiences are greatly appreciated, good or bad, I’m just terrified right now. Thank you.[/INST]Shelters/ DV center/ Agency</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>We made it out earlier today (well I guess yesterday now). I took my 3 year old daughter to the AirBnb we rented long-term/temporarily and she stayed with the babysitter while I ran back to the old apartment and threw as many of the kids' clothes and mine in a suitcase as fast as I could, as my husband was drunk and yelling obscenities at me, trying to rip my clothes and grabbing my hair. I put the baby in the stroller, grabbed him and the suitcase and we left alone. The kids are very upset and confused, still up at 4:30am but here we are, together, safe, and away from our abuser. We did it. We made that first step, that hardest step. I never thought I could do it but I did. I am looking forward to the new, calm, safe and happier next chapter with my children. The hardest part is over.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Really feeling stuck this weekend with my ex. He's been out of the house for 6 months... This past week I found the passport of his ex girlfriend stowed away in a bag. I was able to get her contact through one of his friends I keep in touch with. She told me it "went missing" two days before her flight out of the country but that she had always suspected that he stole it. She went on to share the same abusive stories that I have. Obviously I had to tell the friend why I wanted this woman's contact information, that I found her passport. Suddenly I get a barrage of threatening emails from him this weekend. "Why am I so obsessed with him? Why can't I let it go? Why do I try so hard to ruin his reputation?" It's so hard because I'm actually trying to stay in my lane. I've been successfully no contact for a while now. I would actually love for his reputation to be destroyed, and for people to know how abusive he is. But I don't need to spread rumors for that to happen... It naturally will happen through the consequences of his actions. I honestly feel like I can't say anything to anyone about the relationship, how he's not seeing his son or paying child support, even though it's stuff I really do wish I had someone to talk to about it with.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>My friend just got away from an abusive ex, and they are having to pay 2,000 to break the lease. I think that is very messed up, is there any way to get out of that? They don’t want to press charges against their ex, but this person cut them with razors, left huge bruise marks, bite marks, and scars. I think charges should be pressed but I can’t convince him to, but if nothing else, I just don’t want my friend to have to pay $2,000 for his own safety. Does anyone have any advice? It is male violence, so no one is taking him seriously, but he is going through a lot right now and he showed me his injuries and they are really bad[/INST]Housing</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>My boyfriend that I have been with for 4 years, always abuses me. I am now 20 years old and he is 24, if I do something he dosent like he will hit me. It all started of with me have social media, (instagram and snapchat) he told me that I am not allowed them platforms and I must delete them. He made me sit their and delete every single follower 1 by one, which took hours. After I removed all of the followers, that's when he made me delete the account. He slapped me in my face and pulled my hair back and said "you are only mine". I had all of my friends on those social media platforms, even long distance friends but I was not allowed to have it. I used to be so scared around him he always wanted to check my phone he wanted to check everything. Another time when he abused me, it was when I was going out on a night out with the girls, I was getting ready at my mums house and he wouldn't stop ringing my phone, he constantly kept ringing and texting me saying "I dare you to go out" "I will kill you". I did the worst mistake ever and I turned my phone off. So I went out and went to the clubs, a couple of hours in he was walking up and down the street where the clubs were looking for me, showing people a photo of me asking if "they have seen this girl". He eventually found me and I was outside smoking a cigarette on my own. He already had a car with him, he had a taxi driver, driving him about so I was drunk at this point he pulled me into the taxi and said to the taxi man "drive" I was constantly saying '"I want to get out"I was screaming saying "let me out" and the taxi man kept on driving as my partner told him to. because I continued to shout he told the taxi driver to stop, and he slapped me across my face so hard. He opens the cab door and pulled me out of it with my hair, I was on the floor and he kicked me in my side multiple times. He payed the taxi driver extra money to not say anything, the taxi driver just drove of. I tried to get up and run away but he caught up to me and beat me up on the floor. Theirs so many times where he has beat me up, I've only told you one of them so far, I am now 20 years old and I feel so depressed, so tired and unmotivated in my life. I feel like my life is pointless their is no escape. He has cut me with a knife before threatening me that if I tell the police then he will throw acid in my face. He was this control over me, what he says goes. He tells me to come back and im always running to him. Im always running back because he WONT LEAVE ME ALONE. if I block him, change my number he leaves me emails, letters, comes to my house when he knows my family aren't in. He does everything in his power to keep hold of me. Its not just physical abuse he gives me it is emotional and verbal. He has made me feel so low about my self image and I will never dare step out of my house without makeup as I feel so insecure now, I never used to really wear makeup now I have to wear it. He has punched me in my eye before, slapped me, punched me in my face and all over my body, had me on the floor and he stood on my face saying "this is where you belong" he kicks me when im on the floor and he spits on me. My worst nightmare is when he gets his belt out on me "I just scream begging him to not hurt me" but if its not his belt he will hold a knife towards me. I have a stab mark on my leg so I decided to get a tattoo to cover it up, I don't like to see it I try to forget everything he has done to me but I can't. He will never leave me alone, he will always be their.Ive realised their is so escape. If I tell the police he will get someone to do something to me I know he will. I now do not have the energy to be upset about him abusing me anymore, I feel like it is normal, I have experienced this for 4 years from being 17 years old. I have to live with this until he wants to leave me. :([/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I am considering going tonight, if I can get a ride. I don't know what to expect and I'm scared. I'm autistic and the sudden change is terrifying. I don't know how to get out of the house without him noticing and if he notices he's going to have another huge breakdown and I will completely shut down. I don't know what to do. Do I just wait til tomorrow maybe? Or do I stay and try to work it out? What's it like at one of those places? What do I need to prepare for?[/INST]Shelters/ DV center/ Agency</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>They sent me home again, and there is this void, or emptiness because I've been so isolated from all people. He is the only person I know who can help. I can barely walk, it hurts to breathe, and no matter how I lay I just can't get comfortable. And I have no one to turn to but him. He made sure that I have no friends, I haven't talked to my own children in 2 years. He keeps telling me how cold it is outside and how he will be forced to sleep under a bridge in the frigid cold. The DV shelters run at half capacity because of COVID. So all I have is a hotline, and that's no relationship. So it's easy to go back to what I know, which is him. At least then I'll have someone to talk to and help me heal. This time it was my tailbone and my ribs. I can't even use the bathroom and wipe my own 'area'. The tears just won't stop. How do you reach out to people and make friends?[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>We come from different cultures and although I don't regard myself as a particularly culture-oriented person, my partner is very patriotic about his identity,language and culture and a die-hard fan of music from his people. This is to a point that he has zero tolerance of food or music from other ethnicities and culture and is never up to try anything new. He is abusive and violent and we are kind of going in our separate directions, at least he is. I feel cheated by myself for still have such strong feelings for him, to a point that I would readily accept him back if only he acknowledged his mistakes. Which is never happening, just to be clear. I find myself wondering if he would've treated me more human had I spoken his language, had a nice voice wherein I sang songs in his language and made food for him that he liked??? I hate to admit this but I feel like, when he does get serious about a woman after me or wants to put a ring on her, he will make sure she is from his culture and won't treat her this badly, the way he treated me, because in his head we were partners. And not spouses. I'm saying this because I have seen him flirt with woman from his culture online and he turns into the nicest man, asking them how their day was, listening to them yapping about mundane things and responding in their language. Whereas when I would talk to him about my feelings, the response I would get would be "you are talking too much" I honestly feel degraded and humiliated, because I tried my very best to make this work, giving him chances time and again to sort himself out until it dawned upon me that it boils down to his people and others. And I probably come under others. The realisation was very painful and brutal, considering I spent 6 years in an abusive relationship, only to know that in his eyes I would never get the better version of him, only because I don't come under the category of his people. And because we both use a second language( that both of us are fluent in) to communicate with each other. But I guess at the end of the day second language can never replace mother tongue. And that's that.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>It's done, I've signed the paperwork for a new place, there's no going back, and I'm freaking out. I'm actually doing this. The anxiety and guilt are nearly overwhelming. How will partner get her medications? Get to doctor's appointments? Get food? Do anything? Just keep telling myself she's an adult and not my responsibility. Not my responsibility. Not my responsibility. What about the pets? I'm prepared to leave everything I have except them. But what's best for them? They're going to be upset either way; they love partner, they love me, they're going to be really upset without both of us around. Partner would never, ever hurt them, and will be destroyed if I take them. I do a lot of the work taking care of them: feed them, clean the litter box, take the dog out, clip nails, baths, but I know partner will step up to do the things. And honestly, I think they might like her a little more than me. They're used to me leaving the house, partner is almost always with them. But I do worry about her ability to provide for them, with no job and possibly no place to live. And, again, she'll be devastated, might even make trouble for me over them. I know this is the fear/obligation/guilt I've been programmed to feel, but damn it's strong.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>hi all. i have been in my relationship for 7 years, beginning at age 15. It is the first relationship I’ve been in. Other than outright abuse, one thing that has come from our relationship is that sex is never about my pleasure. We do what he wants, when he wants, for as long as he wants, always. He says it is my job as a woman to serve him sexually, and that no man would ever please a woman without expecting something in return. Can someone who has been in a healthy relationship tell me if this is the case? I am debating leaving, but I really can’t wrap my head around what “normal” sexual dynamics should look like. Is sex really supposed to be so currency-like? It seems so depressing if I will really never be valued besides what my body can provide. I read romance novels and they show it differently, but that might just be unrealistic.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I’m in the process of getting things organized so I can leave my abusive husband. We have been married for 5 years and have two kids, with one on the way. I can’t help but feel so sad for him. He has no clue what’s coming. I on the other hand have had time to process everything. I know he’s going to hurt and cry and miss his kids. He needs help though and I’m tired of being continuously put down in front of my kids, degraded, and financially abused. I cry just knowing the news is going to hit him like a freight train, but I know this is what’s best for my kids and myself.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>> *POSSIBLE TRIGGER WARNING* Has this happened to anyone else? I ended up experiencing what I think was maybe reactive abuse the last 4/5 months of the 3 years we were together. After years of name calling, being pushed up against walls, things being broken, arms grabbed, told women like me deserved to be hit, etc. I finally snapped one night and hit him after being yelled at and cornered for an hour or so. I don’t even really remember what happened besides him telling me I’m ugly, no guy would ever want me, and he could have any girl and if I left I would regret it. I immediately felt like sh** and apologized and he was like see its you you’re the problem. Maybe I was I’m unsure. I just noticed the last few months after attempting to go on a date and not being able to follow through with another. I can’t trust anyone and now I don’t even know if I trust myself. I was okay the first 9 months, but all of a sudden lately I just feel depressed, I have no sense of direction, I don’t think I trust anyone. I dream about the last 3 years sometimes. There’s a lot more gorey details. But, I just wanna know if anyone else felt like this and what they did to overcome it. If possible. edit: to add trigger warning[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I know so many people in domestic violence situations say “it will only happen once” and stay longer than they should, but has anyone ever stayed and it ACTUALLY never happened again? Anyone ever stay with their abused and have them change and be better and have it not happen again?[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I'll try to make this quick: had to make an emergency move out of state and broke up with my narcissistic ex almost a year ago because his abuse escalated from emotional and financial to sexual and physical. He has verbally threatened to kill me before if I was with anyone else and also put his hands on my neck while enraged. I have been completely no-contact since September of last year. The line of communication is 'open' on his part as I have no physical evidence of his assaults and he's dangerous so I try to stay safe in case he threatens me again. Over the course of the last several months, he has: Sent me multiple, very long paragraphs of texts trying to win me back including unsolicited flight offers Sent me unsolicited videos of him &gt;! masturbating to me!&lt; Sent me erotica he wrote about &gt;!raping!&lt; me Sent 11 gifts from a wishlist I gave him years ago to my parents address which is in the state I moved to Moved to a house in the area where I grew up. I kid you not, it is only a couple of blocks away from the high school I attended (we met shortly before I graduated) When he told me he moved to that neighborhood, I knew it was manipulative since he never wanted to be there when we were together, but I didn't know just how close it is to places I used to frequent constantly. If I were to ever visit again, the possibility of him seeing me is now extremely high. My family, current partner, and I all thought his behavior and obsession (fam only knows about the repeated texts and gifts) would decrease because that's what's supposed to typically happen with a narc. This is far beyond normal narc behavior. He texted me the other day saying he "found" a few more of my belongings during his move and sent it over to my parents address again. It came last night. In the package was my perfume that he kept the entire time, some clothes, gummies, and most importantly **A 10-page letter.** In the letter he states: "I know for a fact that deep down inside you still have feelings for me," **"I would do almost anything to be your lover again,"** and "Even though you're not here, this place is "OUR" home. If you ever start missing home, feel free to come back." He very clearly detailed where the house is, which is now confirmed like I said to be right by my old high school. He is going on 54 and I just turned 22. By definition his behavior seems to be stalking (repeatedly making unwanted contact, harassing, etc.) but it's also apparently non-criminal: "Non-criminal behavior could include sending letters, delivering unwanted gifts, or making phone calls to the victim. These behaviors are considered stalking when the victim feels they are threatened and are fearful." He seems to be a rejected stalker subtype and apparently they typically escalate to being violent and trying to enact revenge as their attempts continuously fail, but I'm also scared that he'll retaliate if he gets sent an RO. Am I overreacting? I just don't know anymore. And yes if it isn't obvious already, I've tried all of the "obvious" things like telling him to stop. I'm sure you guys know how well that goes with these types of abusers though.[/INST]Safety planning</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I have been in a physically and mentally abusive relationship on and off for years. I finally hit my breaking point this past weekend. I had voice recorded the last time it happened so that I had proof if I needed to do something about. Of course , because it’s so normal I forgot about it. When he becomes abusive physically he will start to distance himself from me as if it is my fault that we are not getting along. I will try and try to talk through things to no Avail. Until I hit my breaking point. I have extreme anxiety of being abandoned and left alone . As he has discarded me many times. I couldn’t even handle life when he would ignore me. So I was calling and texting him while he just acted like I was crazy. Eventually , I got a call from a police officer saying I cannot call or text him anymore or he was going to press charges on me. I wasn’t shocked but it struck me in the heart just the same. I decided enough was enough and I reported the abuse that I always try to protect him from. For years and years. When he has never protected me. I have a problem with anxiety. I had a panic attack at work out of nowhere and had to leave work because of all of this. I ALWAYS think, if we can just talk about this, I won’t feel bad anymore , something we discuss will make me not feel bad anymore and I can get some kind of closure. No I went to his job ( I used to work there so it’s not uncommon) to ask to speak about this. He was acting like I came to murder him. Which I have never ever touched him before. I couldn’t believe it but also yes I could. He’s a good actor. He basically told me to fuck off or he was going to call the police on me for speaking to him. And then he did. But I had left way before that. I feel ashamed for thinking that I can make this horrible trauma feeling go away. I feel like an idiot for going to talk to him as I feel like it just makes me look like I’m the bad person here. Thank you for listening.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>> My partner had a tough childhood and doesn’t have much family. I want to get out of the relationship but I feel really guilty about it. He’s currently upset that I’m not as affectionate or nice as I used to be and that I haven’t been for a while. That’s true because things have been very difficult between us. Instead of feeling in love - I see him as a threat. Even when I try not to. I keep having flashbacks of him yelling and waving a gun around. He threatens suicide every time I bring up something I’m unhappy with. Especially if I say I want a break or to leave the relationship. He says I’m all he has and he understands why I can’t handle being with him because even his mom can’t deal with it. I don’t want to leave him without anyone to turn to but I’m unhappy and tired of living waiting for the next blow up. We’ve been together for years and I financially support both of us right now.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Police took pics of my black eye, bruised nose, scratched face, felt bump on back of head, I made a statement, went to urgent care to get checked and xrayed, contacted haven house for emergency TPO. Abuser is now texting and calling my sister saying they’re going to send me to jail too saying they had “scratches”. But I know they haven’t done any of the above things I mentioned and my sister went to the apartment to get stuff for me and saw their face and it was fine. Won’t they be able to see who the real victim is?? I’m scared to get in trouble too. When the police came the night it happened they “couldn’t identify the aggressor”. I didn’t do my statement that night and did after I went to the doctor. I’m not at the apartment anymore. They’re still there and I’m displaced. Shouldn’t it be obvious?? Thank you I’m advance.[/INST]Legal</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I am still with my abuser - there is no physical abuse ,just verbal and emotional, he gets extremely angry to the point where it's terrifying. He's so hard to leave because my entire family loves him, they think he's amazing - anytime there's and argument between us my own family defends him. All my friends now love him too along with his own buddy's.I feel like if I leave him I'll lose all my friends, family members even said if it doesn't work out that he can still visit them (this was probs just a poor joke but it's got to me) I just don't get why everyone is so in love with him and I'm the only one afraid of him and terrified to tell anyone of the true extent of the verbal and emotional abuse.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I've been seeing a guy for around 2 months. I see him regularly. I met him via mutual friends. At first I couldn't stand him but he was persistent and I ended up liking him. This is while I was supposed to be taking a break from dating/guys. We haven't slept together but have done other stuff. We also have movie night and do cute things together like cooking, cuddling, and sexual stuff etc. &amp;#x200B; His DV related history: He has restraining order on him from previous long term girlfriend. He mentioned something about strangulation regarding the order as well. He told me it's all lies and that he never hurt her and loved her. He has court coming up for this at some point. He is being minored via ankle monitor. He basically just goes to work and then go home. &amp;#x200B; Texting too much, being possessive, jealous and not giving me space: He sometimes tells me he feels this is too full on, that we should just be friends longer, but I feel like he kind of goes back and forth. Like he told me recently "we're already kind of going out." and "I don't want you doing sexual things with anyone else." but then makes comments saying "Oh this is getting a bit full on." then he takes it back. I don't understand this. &amp;#x200B; I am not full on. I love my space. He is the one who is full on from what I've experienced so far. This makes me feel not good. Like I'm not worthy of proper relationship with him, and that it's because I'm doing something wrong. He also texts me too much sometimes and then also what seems to be guilt tripping me when I don't want to stay over his place or when I need space. &amp;#x200B; He is also jealous when I hang out with male friends even our mutual friends. He asked me if I'm having sex with one of them. I'm not. Each time I need space he asks if I'm sleeping with guys. He called me a cheap sl\*t the other night, said that if I like male attention so much I should go be a prostitute, then told me I took it wrong way, that he just didn't know how to express his feelings. He also said "I don't know what you're getting up to when I'm not here. I'm not here all the time." "People have told me things about you. That's why I'm asking." I asked him who, he wouldn't say and just got angry at me for asking who, said I'm being suspicious. &amp;#x200B; I have also found myself reacting to him and being nasty back, which I know is not healthy. I told him if he's going to call me a sl\*t I will go be one, which I know is immature and not healthy. I was sick of hearing it. That just made him worse and more paranoid about it. &amp;#x200B; Calling me names like bipolar and crazy, bitch, ect: He also calls me crazy and bipolar sometimes too. He asked me "If you're going to be my gf you won't be crazy right.?" I told him it's better to not actually date as we already have issues. He called me a narcissist the other day. Age difference (not sure if this matters.): I'm 29. He's 37. So he's 8 years older. Drug and alcohol use: He drinks often and sometimes smokes meth. I do not drink or do any drugs at all. &amp;#x200B; Different rules/double standards: He seems to have no issue flirting with other women in front of me sometimes. I don't really even react to it. He was flirting with his lawyer while seeing me, which she put a stop to straight away. She told him no. He was hitting on female friend who drove him to work. He hit on another woman other day, as well. I was there, and I assume he thought I didn't hear. I can only imagine how angry he would get if I did the same with guys. &amp;#x200B; Once his possessiveness came up that's when he asked to be exclusive. Are these red flags? The positives about him is how protective he is and he always cooks for me or buys me food. He's also sweet with my cat. When he's nice he's just a teddy bear. He was arrested the other day for not charging his ankle monitor (dv related) and the space has given me more time to think about this whole thing and how unhealthy it is. &amp;#x200B; I'm going to end this as honestly it makes me feel horrible about myself. I'll try to just not speak to him at all even though I come across him regularly. I've tried to end this before and he always makes a deal of it.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>This is my second time posting from this throwaway account. I don’t want these posts to come back on me later so I don’t post them from my true Reddit account. I posted last week about my relationship, and invite you to read that to get some context. I’m unsure if I’m posting this in the right place, because he doesn’t hit me, and I don’t mean to undermine domestic violence victims, so I will apologize in advance if I mistakenly posted in the wrong place. Basically, he’s been hiding my things from me to keep me from leaving but walks us into arguments that 1) make me want to leave and 2) when I do leave for a day or so to avoid others hearing us argue, he uses that against me later and questions my commitment. It’s all a mental game that he plays. I FINALLY found my other car key (he hid it 6 weeks ago). What ignited me to find it was when he put my other key in the washer with the sheets (I have been sleeping with my key under the pillow so he can’t take it in the middle of the night without waking me up) the key that he washed is fried and if I didn’t find the other I would be trapped. I plan on working through the rest of the week and the weekend and departing for good Monday afternoon. Yes, we can keep the peace until then. I need the time here to make sure I have all my belongings out of the house and to create a coherent plan that allows me to leave without EVER having the urge to come back or answer his calls once I’m gone. He has a history of baiting me into coming back. I guess what I’d like to know is, other than having as much cash as I can possibly gather, what else should I do before I go? I’ll have my clothes &amp; important documents. Changing my phone number isn’t an option. But I’ll gladly block him. Is there anything else I should have in order? Are there some goals I can set to make sure I avoid him for good? Is there any advice anybody could give me? Thank you guys for reading through my rant and thank you for any help that can be provided for me.[/INST]Safety planning</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>My wife swung a full tea kettle at my head multiple times. In my mind that is enough. We've been together for 12 years and have had our share of arguments, shouting matches and days-long separations, but nothing like this. The deeper issue, I feel, is exemplified by the fact that I had to leave and figure out somewhere to stay. It's been 4 days now and I just slept in a friend's garage. Tried staying with another, my only other real, friend but he came down with covid. I'm lost and angry and as sad as I've ever been even after a lifelong battle with depression. I can caveat all this with; when she started yelling at me for being distant I was calm but not nice, but that doesn't come close to rationalizing the outcome. I can also add that since the birth of our son she has experienced increasingly more severe PMDD episodes, which always lead to her yelling at me. I have tried to be understanding but other than getting on Prozac (which helped a little for a while) she has made next to no effort to mitigate these episodes, maybe 5 therapy visits and another prescription that she only took one day. It hurts to think of leaving. It hurts to think that she'll probably blame me. I'm certain that mental work has already started based on the article she sent me "help, my husband made me so mad that I hit him," which never even addresses the hitting part. And our kids are better off with me in my house, at least right now, but I feel powerless to change the situation. He have an appointment with a marriage counselor and I can't bring myself to even talk to her till then, but that's a week away. I just don't know what to do. Tl;Dr Wife tried to bash my head in and kicked me out of the house. Pretty sure she thinks it's my fault[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I’m her co worker but I can’t stand the “ I fell again” statements when it’s clear this guy hit her again. I’m sure she gets abused because of her husband’s obviously aggressive nature. I’ve talked to her about her bruises and stuff by she’s not keen on opening up. I need some advise. Update: she eventually left him and she moved to a different city. We talk regularly and she seems to be doing well.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I'm not going to go into my abuse in much detail at all because that's not the point of this post and I don't want to make it uncomfortable to read. Long story short, I'm 27 and living with my family, they're some pretty bad and manipulative people who want me to stay here forever despite not appreciating anything I do and treating me badly. It's too bad for them that I just bought a cheap apartment some states away next to some people I know and trust. More than anything else in the world, I want to be free and I want to use that freedom to become a much better person than I am now. I've been doing too little for too long, I have a fair bit of savings which is why I do not fear much for my financial situation in doing this as of right now but what I do fear is getting away unnoticed and getting away with all of my important things which isn't much but let me just lay my plan out for you guys and maybe we can see if it can use some tweaking. First of all, I pay the phone and internet bill which I obviously will not continue to pay after leaving. If worst comes to worst, I can just put it on a credit card I've been given by a family member to pick stuff up at the store from them which I never use anyway because they always expect me to pay with me own money. Is there anyway that instead, I can get some sort of prepaid card that will pay those bills and put a couple months worth of money onto it? I'm not sure that's possible or if it could be used to screw me over if the card is under my name or something. Another thing is making it out of my house with everything. I don't have my own car but I am renting an SUV for the trip so I can fit everything. I live upstairs and we have some doors that make noise when you open and close them. I am going to have to come in and out multiple times to get everything into the car. They'll notice if stuff starts going missing from my room earlier so it's not like I can box stuff up and hide it earlier. This is the part I'm the most afraid of, I don't want to get caught in the middle of leaving and I can't think of any other way to go about this, I even have a fairly big and heavy PC that I'll need to get out of the house along with some monitors and other equipment. This is not stuff that I can just leave behind. I am not really sure how to go about this without waking someone up and at least being checked on. I already have my Social Security, Passport and Birth Certificate btw so at least I don't have anything to worry about there. I also am not sure about changing my address, I know it's an easy process but right after doing it, don't they send you a big letter that says something along the lines of "address change" on it? I don't really get much important in the mail because I do pretty much everything online but could they possibly use that letter to get my mail sent back to their house? I'm not sure how that stuff works. I basically just want help with the planning for this if anybody has better ideas or tweaks to the ideas I already have, I'm kind of just winging it.[/INST]Safety planning</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>It’s been two years, almost three since the two incidents. I literally left to another part of the world. Yet they follow me . I’m in therapy and they’re less frequent but still present[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I’ve been in a physically, mentally and emotionally abusive relationship for 2 years now. My boyfriend started hitting me around month 3 of our relationship. The worst of which I bled for 30 minutes and required stitches on my face for. He has spit on me, kicked me in my uterus, slapped me countless times, pinched me, thrown drinks at me, hit my head against the wall and done several other things. He has broken my phone, my specs, my straightener too before. I am very sure I absolutely do not want to be with him but I’m scared he will do something and lure me in to being with him forever. I don’t have the guts to call the police because I don’t want to cause a scene. I am a medical student and so is he and I don’t really want this to affect either of our careers. For context, I am 22F and he is 25. He knows where I live but my roommates don’t know I am still involved with him because we were supposedly broken up months ago. I don’t want him to come to my house and cause a scene because he has done that in the past. And every time he lures me in saying he will send my nudes to my parents. My parents hate him and warned me not to be with him but I still was with him. If I call the authorities, my parents will find out but if I don’t he will threaten and blackmail me and lure me in &amp; then I will keep having to face this trauma. What should I do?[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I'm not sure if this is even actually abuse, but everywhere I've looked says it is, and it's kind of destroying me. I don't feel like I'm being abused, actually. She mistreated me in the past, but things have been fine for about two years now with no real further incidents. She has made real efforts to improve her mental health, and improve our relationship. It's gone well, except.... well, the suicide threats. We are in a long distance relationship, and periodically she will just tell me that she's going to kill herself, and then turns off her phone. I really can't tell if she's just that mentally ill, or if I'm being abused again. If I was being given ultimatums I'd be more sure, but I'm not. She just.... Usually when we fight, the fight ends because she says she is going to kill herself, then she turns off her phone and comes back in the morning. Sometimes we aren't even fighting though. Today she was complaining about the ants in her apartment, and I started trying to give her advice. She says that the advice is overwhelming her, so she is going to go kill herself, then hung up and turned off her phone. She's still gone No matter how many times she does this, it never stops sending me in to a panic. I am always terrified that this one is finally going to be it. I am powerless to do anything about it but sit by the phone for hours trying to stay calm and waiting for her to get back, sometimes crying off and on, but mostly just going into this numb third person view state. I hate this. I hate going through all the panic and pain of losing a loved one like this over and over again. It's killing me. I don't know how to explain how hard this is for me. I've lost someone to suicide before, and I have some not insignificant abandonment issues aside from that. She's posted suicide notes to her social medias, then disappeared for entire days before. Every time it's fucking devastating. I am destroyed every time it happens. And sometimes she does it because I upset her, but sometimes she does it just.... because. I didn't even do anything this time. I did nothing wrong this time, nothing that should have upset her. She didn't give me any ultimatums, or do anything controlling. She just... decided to plunge me into panic for whatever reason. It's the fact that she does this just in general that makes me so unsure if this is abuse or not. Is she just being severely mentally ill? Is she just hurting this bad? Is she doing this to hurt me?? Is that a self centered thing to ask? I just feel lost, hurt, scared and confused. I need advice. About what to do about this. About if this is even abuse at all in the first place. If it isn't, then I'm sorry for posting here. I just didn't know who else I could ask about this, I don't want anyone in our real lives to think ill of her, but I needed to ask someone. Is this an abusive behavior? Or is this just a mental health crisis? Am I being selfish about this?? Please help me[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>It’s been 3 months since I left my abuser and the holidays have taken a toll on me. I’m 24 and met him at 19 since I’ve spent every Xmas and new year with him. He was so sweet for almost 3 years and it constantly makes me question whether I was actually abused or not or if I’m over exaggerating the abuse. What if I did provoke him or push him to become that way. He would push me, talk down to me and even cut me once and he’d make me feel like I needed to apologize even when he was being mean or unreasonable but on the flip side of that he was always supportive and did everything for me. My mind knows that it was abuse so why do I keep questioning it. Why do I miss him, why am I jealous of his new life. And why does it hurt that he’s forgotten me. I feel like an idiot.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I’m not in a physically abusive relationship, but it can be one that’s very verbally, mentally, and emotionally abusive. I’d like a place to talk about it.[/INST]DV survivors network/ (Online) support groups</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>This is my “secret” Reddit account he didn’t know about. So hopefully I am safe to (vaguely) post about this. I just want support, reassurance from someone who’s been in my shoes.. My ex was absolutely afraid of abandonment, so I stayed for years and excused his horrible behavior. I had loved him. But. he finally snapped when I tried to leave. I’ll skip the details because I’m not really ready to talk about them. But after a very violent night, I was left with a concussion, strangulation, broken bone, and cuts/bruises all over. I did everything I could to just calm him down from the start, but it was a horrible, several hour assault.. I secretly called 911 when I could, and now he’s in jail with several charges including felonies. He has also broken the protective order several times, from jail. So about 10 charges. I am scared for whenever he gets out. I think he might have killed me had I not lied and agreed to stay with him. (I am absolutely not staying with him). The forensic nurse told me I was lucky to live. he strangled me so hard I passed out and peed myself..I am hoping and praying he just leaves me alone and never talks to me again. I have been incontinent since it happened.. i have peed myself randomly and I feel so embarrassed. My head is foggy and I feel confused. I keep forgetting things- left my door wide open until a neighbor came to tell me. Don’t remember opening it. My throat hurts and it feels like I’m breathing through a straw. My body hurts. I feel so much pain and so much loneliness. I do have a great support system and advocacy. I just needed to write this out. I’m honestly nervous to have this information out on the web and will probably delete this soon. But any advice or reassurance from people who have made it through would mean a lot to me. Or just to have space to vent my inner fears and thoughts…[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I testified for over 4 hours today in a custody hearing before falling apart and getting emotional. I know I'm not supposed to get emotional on the stand, but I did. I got triggered. I got so frustrated. I broke down and cried. My ears started ringing. I had a hard time hearing questions. How do I take care of myself and recover? What self care works for such an extreme emotional response to talking about being abused and hurt in court?[/INST]Legal</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I have 3 kids w my abuser I just left after 9 years. I can’t totally cut him off bc of the kids. Some days I wish I could. Recently he has been crying so much to me &amp; honestly I feel bad for him sometimes. I know he has no one else. We are super trauma bonded. Both had bad child hoods. But at the time I left I made up my mind. I wasn’t doing it to myself anymore! He proved over &amp; over he didn’t care about me or my tears! Now he cries to me, &amp; I feel heartless. Telling him you never cared when you hurt me, now your surprised I actually left ! Idk it’s hard actually having to deal with him. Sometimes I know it would be easier if I didn’t have to. Part of me feels bad. Part of me still wants to help. But he has to learn to cope without me. Idk it’s harder than I thought! (2 months free after 9 years) ❤️‍🩹[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I read so many times that "you can't stop abuse by changing your behavior." But in my case, my partner *only* gets verbally abusive and physically threatening if I do things he doesn't like (and says are "abusive"). If I just don't do those things, everything is genuinely smooth, peaceful and amicable on the surface. He doesn't randomly build up to things or get triggered by anything other than me. Given that, it is very hard for me not to think it is all my fault and he is just reacting defensively to stuff I am doing. Anyone else have a situation like this? I should add I never feel safe or supported during these "good" phases, because I am only behaving in an approved fashion because either 1-I am avoiding "provoking" his responses, or 2-I am just so emotionally burned out that I am disconnected and not engaging. This makes me think that technically a coercive framework is always "active," even when things look peaceful, and this is really what people mean when they say you "can't stop the abuse?"[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>> Possible TW - domestic violence. My boyfriend of nearly 2 years is a good person who provides for me emotionally and physically. He is so sweet and extra loving. He has hobbies and he works really hard. Except when he drinks/drugs. Ive known since the beginning that he does cocaine - and I believed him when he said it was occasional. I also know he binge drinks but it comes and goes in waves - or so I thought. Im starting to think he drinks at the gas station on his way home. In July of 2020 we decided to move in because the pandemic and we were always together. We had been out drinking that night. I dont know what happened or triggered it but I took a video during the event im about to mention. (I have PTSD from my earlier life and black out traumatic events as a coping mechanism.) on the video i am hysterically crying and saying please stop while he screamed at me to get the fuck out and when I said something about S (his roommate who moved out that week -im sure by no coincidence) he said he doesnt give a fuck he will be as loud as he wants. There was a hole in the closet door when i woke up and the gun was not where it typically goes. I forgave him because i didnt remember it and i figured it must have been a fluke. Ff to December of 2020. I found out i was pregnant. We did not know what to do. I told him i wasnt sure and he wasnt either. H was asking hat i wanted to eat from Uber Eats and i said i didnt know. He broke a metal broom over his knee and threw it at the floor and said “you dont know anything do you.” We decided to keep it, but i had a miscarriage. Ff to April 2021. We share the same birthday and had just got back from pur birthday trip - which was lovely and we had no issues. We went to easter at my friends and then after we went out for a snacks. We ran into some coworker friends of his which prompted me to ask him why they lived in a shitty apt when I know how much they make and im sure they can agford better. I could have phrased it better but i was just asking, like maybe they have debt or maybe they have expensive hobbies. He started screaming at me in this super fancy restaurant. Everyone looked at me. I finished my food and went to find him at the car but the car was gone. I called an uber with only 3% battery and some random person gave me a cigarette while i waited. I got home but had no keys so i paid the uber driver to wait with me. My boyfriend showed up and i went inside the garage but he locked me in there. He left and went to a bar after throwing a house key at me. Ff to 2 nights ago. He knockd over the coat rack on accident and it completely broke. I got upset (i shouldnt have) and he lost his mind. He started screaming at me and then threw a bottle of cleaning supplies at our brand new fridge and dented it. Which just hurts, i put my whole soul into making this a home and he just destroys it. So i got mad enough to call his dad. He left And i told his mom and dad everything. The yelling, the throwing, the punching, the drugs and everything above. I was on the phone all night with his mom and both his mom and dad begged me to leave him and said he wouldn’t change. I almost did- i loaded my car with everything and my dogs and i almost left but the hotel that allows dogs had no availability so i came back. He came back the next morning with the most dead eyes, no soul in them. He told me he was at his drug dealers house all night. I spent the whole day finding a veterans rehab with a bed that can take him. But he starts a new job in less than the length of the program so i dont think i can convince him. The job would be about 75% of our income and we live in a very expensive western city and that will be his excuse but if he doesnt go there arent many good options. He wont make it like this. Does anyone have a suggestion for me? Please be kind Thank you for reading.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Hi! So, I (F28) have been in a relationship for 11 years and married for 5. My husband (M33) loses his temper really easily, but it's been getting a bit worse since a couple of years. He yells when he is angry at me and throws tantrums and recently as soon as he gets mad he hits things, like his desk or anything he has at hand, before, he just slammed stuff if he got REALLY angry from a discussion but now is so easy for him to snap. In all our time together he has only raised his hand at me twice but never hits me, I (most of the time) think he will never hurt me but he uses the spanking excuse to "hit" me when he is angry at me, you see, I like spanking and slaps on my face but sometimes he takes it out of the bedroom and I don't really like it like that. Once, when we were having a big argument I didn't want to talk anymore, he was asking me something in a really rude way and I was trying to ignore him because he was acting mean and he got so mad he spanked me really really hard and it didn't feel good, I got upset and called him out. It was a hard slap on my butt and I felt hurt, I think he did that because he is "allowed" to and he took advantage and thinks is not as bad as actually hitting my face or something. I try to not be scared of him because I think there's no reason to but I've been thinking about it a lot this days and I've read some things about it that makes me question all of this. Overall he is the kindest, nicest, most considerate husband and I feel I'll never meet someone like him but when he is angry, everything changes. I don't know if this is abuse or is this normal behavior? Are men usually like this? Is is possible he could really hurt me one day if he hasn't before? Should I be scared?[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>🛑UPDATED POST: SATURDAY NOVEMBER 13, 2021 at 5:51 pm 🛑 UPDATE HERE: I almost took my dog and left yesterday. He is angry and full of rage. I swear he has been on a warpath since July when I sold an investment property and made over $700K. He is in a jealous fury. He hasn’t hit me since August, when he hit me in the back of the neck and couldn’t walk for several days but his behavior, his attitude is getting worse every day. Since July, he has constantly, several times a week, he has called me bad, really bad names and constantly calling me fat, nasty, old. He’s been on a warpath of rage. Yesterday, I told him I was leaving (I know, I should not have told him) He was enraged. All day. I was really ready to just go. Just walk away. But I’m afraid of what he will do to me. When we first married, 2 months into our marriage he had me wrongfully arrested. I understand now. He wanted to make me afraid so when he beat on me, I wouldn’t call the police. I told him a week before our 8th wedding anniversary that I was leaving him. Well, he was on his best behavior, being kind, talking nice then, we came home from being out on our anniversary, the next day, I woke up on and I heard the Lord say the moment I opened my eyes, “He can do it again. Then take off.” That very same day, he threatened to make up lies and put me in jail again.He raised hell from Tuesday November 2 until Friday November 5 until we had a friend come in town for the weekend. Then he was perfect. Well, the moment our friend left on Monday, here comes his anger and rage. It’s non stop. He won’t even work. Today, we ate lunch at a restaurant and he really showed himself. He acted like a fool, just an embarrassment and I was cussed out all the way home. He told me he was punishing me for wanting to leave him. The past few months, The Lord gave me a revelation. Just 2 months after we were married, I heard The Lord say to me “Pray to be protected from your husband”. I realized a few weeks ago, The Lord never told me any different. It’s been 8 years.🛑END OF UPDATE NOVEMBER 13, 2021 🛑 My husband is extremely, violently abusive.Tonight, he called me a fat, overweight bitch for the last time.Due to his pattern of abuse, he will become physically violent in the next day or so. It gets worse every time. I’ve been going through this for 9 years.Children are all grown. Money not an issue.A shelter isn’t an option, I don’t trust them and I don’t trust the police.Im thinking of getting a hotel and hiring a lawyer. He will be absolutely devastated losing me. Thoughts? How would you just disappear?How would you just leave?! 🛑 UPDATE: Thursday, November 11, 2021 734pm. 🛑So many of you have given excellent advice and I want to give an update of where I am with all this: It was suggested to me here to download and read, “Why does he do that?”. I’m only half way through the book and it has been eye opening. I’m getting answers and clarification that I have desperately needed. It was such a revelation, it was like a bright spot light went off. 💡 When my husband woke up this morning , he must have sensed something different about me, without me saying a word. It’s been yet another day of him acting out, blaming me for hours on end non-stop, putting me down, attempting to convince me that I am his problem. He is angry. Very angry. While this went on all day, I remained at peace. I didn’t defend myself, I didn’t yell, I didn’t cry, I didn’t talk back. I just sat quietly, literally unmoved by his words/actions while he blamed me, cussed me, told me I was stupid, towered over me yelling/cussing or when he stood in the doorway and yelled/cussed. Before, I would defend myself and talk back, I would argue with him, I would cry… So I told him that I’m not sure if we should stay married, I would give him plenty of money, a vehicle, anything he wanted from inside our home if he wanted to leave. That made him extremely angry. Big mad. (I know I should NOT have said that…) Here is a concern: I saw a look today that I haven’t seen in years. I saw a look that says “revenge“. A look that says, “I’m going to pay you back for this because I’m losing control of you“. A look that says, “violence, harm, deception“. It was the same look he gave me 9 years ago, only two months after we married, and he had me wrongfully arrested, put a restraining order against me, making up lies, abusing me yet saying he was afraid of me (he is 5 foot 10 inches, 270 pounds, solid muscle and I’m 5 foot 4 inches and 124 pounds, calling me fat/obese). He left me abandoned, broke and struggling. It took a year to get through that legal and financial mess. I filed for divorce after one year, he then came running back home and yet here we are. I‘ve read every comment here. Honestly, until right now, I didn’t take serious the comments that said “Don’t tell him you are leaving” or “Don’t let him know your plans”. I wanted to think in my mind that if he knew, he would be devastated and would change. The truth is, the only thing that came out of me telling him, it made him more revengeful and even angrier. So I gave him assurance I wouldn’t leave him. And now I continue reading my book, getting more revelation, while gathering my important things, making my plans, hoping he doesn’t do something evil to me in the meantime. Like having me arrested again, crying he is a victim. I will say again, I’ve seen that evil look before. I‘m grateful this time that I have years of video and medical proof this time of his abuse. 🏳I’m never alone so I can’t call so does anyone know if you can chat with a domestic violence hotline so I can have some initial proof that can be documented, in advance, in case he tries to have me arrested again?Any other suggestion of a legal person/entity I can email/chat with to send documentation to help me?I‘m thinking he would do it just to “put me in my place” and to give him some time to gather expensive items from our home to sell then take off. I’ve hidden all the jewelry but that doesn’t mean he won’t find it. One of the items is a watch I bought him for $8K. Thoughts??Advice?? &amp;#x200B;[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>For context…I was granted a one year restraining order 2 years ago. Last month, I asked for a second one after the abuse escalated and the controlling behavior got to a point I couldn’t even drive to work without him on FaceTime. At work. Couldn’t shit with the door shut. Couldn’t go to bed when I wanted. He has been depriving me of sleep for years. I was granted a 7 year restraining order this time. He tried to gaslight me and the judge, using my bipolar disorder against me. Said I was off my meds, that all he’s tried to do for 3 years was love me and I keep trying to leave him. The judge said she found me entirely credible and granted me that length of time. Not two weeks later, he filed a motion to appeal. Pretty sure he got the idea from YouTube. He doesn’t make a lot, his family is poor, and he spends all his money on drugs. I did respond to his motion with a picture of my face after he’d broken my nose in two places and just messed it up…I still had blood crusted on my mouth because it kept breaking open every time I opened it. I submitted the text from his mom (she never had anything to do with me except the last time I got an RO she convinced me to drop it. She did stay with us this past summer until he violently kicked her stuff down the stairs, got in her face, screamed at her, called her the c word. He’s vowed never to speak to her again-she really hasn’t had much to do with him either, so this was a violation of the RO), texts from him to my friends telling them I’m a liar and how he’s destroyed, how could I act this way after all we’ve been through. They’ve blocked him. I’m sure he’s texted many more that I don’t know about. The hearing is on the same day as his status hearing-he was mandated to batterers counseling. He was super pissed about that. I fear he’ll come after me. I actually am afraid he’s followed me home from work, although he’s been banned from here after he stormed in trying to drag me out the day I escaped with the dogs and what little I could carry. Any words of advise or positively would be welcome. I don’t want to see his face again, and now I have to. This man has said to me that he’d hit me so hard, I’d never wake up. Knocked me out several times. My dv counselor told me he’s been raping me after I told her I never wanted to be intimate with him-I would give in. If I didn’t, there would be a huge blow up. Often, there was anyways, because I wasn’t into it. He has accused me of cheating every single day. Never let me out of his sight. Ever. It has been exhausting. Tell me it’ll be ok and she’ll make it permanent. This appeal is going before the same judge that granted the 7 year RO.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>The court system for DV victims is frightening, is it not? Particularly, for parents who are not permitted to escape their abusers. One, often used, means of abuse is the threat. So, does the threat of returning to court count? My abuser threatens police, third party, and court action if I do not respond to accusatory messages or adjust the parenting schedule (I never waiver from the parenting plan - ever). And yet, I seek zero legal help. The reason being, I'm almost sure the courts/police would not view these threats as legitimate. Why? Well, because the institutions I'd be petitioning for help ARE the threat. And courts have to uphold the notion that they are not an entity to be feared, right? Furthermore, I've heard that the first person to pursue legal action becomes know as the "up start," the bad guy, the frowned upon. So, despite sleepless nights, fear, alienation, worry, and hours upon hours spent collecting and organizing preemptive exhibits, I take zero legal steps. I remain in a defensive position at a constant. I often hear, "Oh, just let it go. Don't worry about it. He'll never do thoes things." And I wonder "Well, how much evidence and money will I have, exactly, if I sit here and plan for nothing?" My guess is very little.   So, instead, I work myself ragged in "what if" land. I swear, I'm damned if I do, damned if I don't. Threatened with the very system that might save me from threat. Gaah, when will this end! This is a small piece of a very large puzzle: Harrassment was discussed many times in court. He was simply told not to do it. We use a communication app, the defamatory remarks continue regardless. I never respond. He currently slanders me via email (libel) to our daughter's councelor. I have no idea how this is affecting my professional relationship with this authority. Depending on the councelors experience, she'll either dismiss it outright or she'll adopt a negative view of me as a parent. The physical abuse was addressed only during the first of six or seven hearings. He was ordered a psychological evaluation but did not comply. Our hearing officer never brought it up again. He was non compliant at every hearing. Never submitted proof of therapy, firearms, refused to submit paperwork for our daughter, I could go on and on. Yes, I had legal representation throughout. He was eventually ordered one overnight with our child; very little time. But for how long? How long before he motions the court and our daughter becomes subject to more harm? She needs a father. I get it, I do, I remember the need very well. She also cries, returns home confused or passing messages, and shows me that she feels unsafe in his home. If you are in a similar position: I am so damn proud of you. You should not have to bear this weight but you do. Your beautiful kids deserve so much more. Hang tight. I'm with you. If you are being abused: If you feel trapped, confused, manipulated, degraded, worthless, depressed, frightened, anxious, isolated. If you've been pushed, yanked, tripped, restrained, pinned, blocked, hit, choked, threatened, stalked. If you've had items taken from you, hidden from you, broken in front of you, next to you, over you. DO NOT HESITATE. Get a protection order NOW! Yes, you probably love this person, you may stay with this person, but the day you leave you will thank GOD you gave yourself a means. Please. A protection order that is sought late in the game, once proceedings are underway, will be viewed as retribution. Your request will be disapproved. It will be too late. - Love Raving Mad Mommy[/INST]Childbearing</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Am I the only one who feels like this? I kept the abuse a secret so long that nobody believes me except the police. A couple of months ago he fractured my skull and beat me so severely that the police were begging me to press charges. I was scared so I didn’t. Flash to last weekend where he put a piece of cloth around my neck and strangled me until I almost passed out. I couldn’t take any more. This time when asked I pressed charges. He was arrested that same day but I feel like a piece of disloyal garbage. I love him deeply but I know he’s going to kill me if things continues down the path they were on. Any advice on how I can overcome this overwhelming sense of guilt for pressing charges?[/INST]Legal</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Any time my husband becomes physically or verbally abusive ,(last night I got home and for no reason at all he started acting angry and aggressive and accused me of gross sexual shit within hearing distance of out 2 kids) and I confront him later about it....he will either A) says he doesn't remember. It's so convenient how selective he is with his recollections, and he really sticks with the "I seriously don't remember that at all, it makes no sense!" Schtick. He claims that with all the times he's hit and strangled me too, just can't remember 🙄 Or B) he will say "what did I do wrong? Tell me" and even tho he knows damn well what he did, ill tell him...only for him to ask AGAIN "wait, so what did I do again?" Literally minutes later. He played this game 3 times in a row last night, until I was like "I'm not doing this anymore, good night" and then he goes "see? You can't even tell me what the issue is" even though I've already told him THREE OR FOUR TIMES WITHIN THE LAST HALF HOUR. It gets me so frustrated I'm in tears, is that gaslighting or something other tactic[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>My sister has been ringing me every couple of weeks to say that her husband is upsetting her, yelling during arguments, yesterday she rang me to say that she felt like she was having a breakdown and that he was going to leave her because of her mental state. I could hear him in the background saying no I'm not. Two weeks ago she stayed at my house for a couple of nights because they had a bad fight because he told her that the miscarriage she had at the start of the year was her fault for not meditating and looking after herself. I've always withheld my full opinion of her husband since I want to be supportive and let her make her own mind up but yesterday I told her that his behaviour is abusive and she needs to discuss it with her psychologist and GP who she was going to see that afternoon. She said he's not abusive he just yells because he's upset about what happened. I said it doesn't matter why he's yelling it's not acceptable it's abuse. Two weeks ago she told me that when he yells she is afraid he will hit her. They were due to start IVF after only 5 months of trying for a baby and that seemed like a colossal waste of money and a bad idea all round so I managed to talk her into delaying that. I've given her they keys to my house and have said she can go there whenever she needs. How else can I support her? Should I keep pointing out his gaslighting and abuse or am I going to alienate her?[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I’m looking for videos (YouTube etc) to watch. I’ve left my abuser, but I’m struggling to process emotions. I would like to know if you have recommendations for someone *after* leaving the relationship. In the aftermath so to speak. Most videos are about the escape, planning the escape or how to tell if you are a victim. I would like some sources for my current situation. Thank you everyone.[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>> I’ve had a restraining order on him for almost 2 years now. He violated mine 2/6/20, 10/14/21, 11/19/21 and his other ex’s RO on 10/11/21. They sent me mail that he is being put on trial in family court for domestic violence. What should I expect in this situation with court. I’m not sure if they’re going to sentence him or what but would like some input.[/INST]Legal</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>My new bf and I go on vacation with his family a few weeks into the relationship - we’re all staying in a beach house with thin walls. One night, his alcoholic brother (33M) starts cussing his wife out and calling her names. We overhear him slapping her. I was horrified. My bf acted pissed, but he didn’t intervene. Neither did his parents. His brother storms out of the house to go for a night drive. Its 1AM and he’s been pounding vodka since 10AM the day before. At this point, I’m terrified. I tell my bf to go after him, and he gets up and chases him down with his car. Suffice it to say, I was disturbed. I’d never witnessed domestic violence before and I couldn’t believe how none of their immediate family members moved to intervene. What’s worse is before we started dating, my bf playfully slapped my butt so hard I screamed in shock and pain all because I was declining sex. He was irritated but he tried to play it off as a joke. He barely even knew me then and we weren’t dating! The whole situation feels like a dealbreaker but I’m not sure. What would posses a family to react this way to their sister in law getting abused? What do you think I should do? Is my bf likely to also be an abuser? TL;DR: went on vacation with my new bf and his family. One night his alcoholic brother was abusing his wife and no one in my bf’s family attempted to intervene. My bf never apologized for the situation later and it’s making me look at certain boundary crossing behaviors he’s exhibited (hitting me really hard on the butt when he barely knew me, and we weren’t dating) like he may be an abuser too.[/INST]Communication</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Plenty of people have told me that I'm the survivor in my relationship. I'm even in counseling through a program that doesn't offer services to primary aggressors. But I can't seem to bring myself to stop trying to prove I'm the aggressor. I play endless devil's advocate. For all the evidence I can provide that I am the survivor, I can always "spin" things in my head so that I'm the aggressor. I'm familiar with the DARVO thing, and my partner has always alleged either that I am the aggressor or that it is "mutual abuse" (I know, not a thing). But I just keep asking myself, "Wait, am I the one doing DARVO? Am I actually "spinning" the evidence when I believe I am not the aggressor?" Primary aggressors seem to proceed through life with extraordinary denial and confusion, truly believing they are survivors. If they can be so deeply fooled by their minds, how do I know I am not being fooled by mine? Anyone else have a hard time with this? If so, do you know *why* it is or was so hard for your brain to accept that you are the survivor in your case? I have read so many clarifying resources and still am confused every day.[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>Question about divorce lawyers. How often do you expect to hear from your lawyer? I paid the retainer in November. She submitted paperwork but it was only accepted by court in middle of December. I emailed multiple times. She didn’t get back to me. Finally I looked at court website and found case management conference scheduled for May. I emailed and begged for update and ask what does case management conference mean and she said to call. I spoke with her. She asked for info, but didn’t tell me what the terms meant. I spoke with her Jan 14. It’s Jan 30th. How long should I wait to hear from her? I get that she isn’t my therapist and I don’t need hand holding. But I am going nuts not knowing when I will get paperwork. Not knowing when this hell will be over. TLDR: paid retainer November, lawyer never answers email, the summons paperwork still hasn’t been mailed to me. Is this normal for lawyers?[/INST]Legal</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>> I think that’s the reason my husband would hurt me and then when I bring it up he acted like he didn’t know what I was talking about or he would say he didn’t remember him doing it.[/INST]DV knowledge</s>

<s>[INST] <<SYS>>We have 8 kinds of information support analysized from the posts from social media from domestic violence victim. The followings are the types and their definition. A.Shelters/DV center/Agency：Any organizations working for domestic violence survivors, including shelters, community centers, agency, NGOs etc. B.Legal:Information related to legal system, laws, justice, divorce procedure C.Childbearing:Information related to the rights to take care children, difficulties to take care children. D.Police:Information related to calling police for action, police reactions, police helpfulness. E.DV report procedure/Documentation:Information related to how to report DV cases, what documents are needed and what evidence are mandatory. F.Safety planning:Information related to safety measures to protect the survivors, steps to leave the relationship safely and plans for safety reporting. G.DV knowledge:Seeking information about DV criteria, red flags, cycle of DV, types of DV etc. H:Communication:Information realted to the communication strategies with family, friends, children and others during and after DV. Based on the analysis of the content of post, give me the information need kind from above 8 types.<</SYS>>I’ve been in a volatile and abusive relationship for years. Psychical violence, control, and spousal rape. Oh and of course gas lighting like none of this has never happened to me. It’s been a while since things got physical. About over a year honestly. The spousal rape happens more often. We broke up for a summer and when we got back together and he found out I had slept with other people he pretty much chummed it up to me cheating and being dishonest the whole time. So to him I am a liar through out the relationship. He no longer has anger issues because you know justified behavior for being a “whore”. Last night he was drunk like drinking for about 8 hours straight drunk. He got in my face and started telling me that all I did during our relationship was choke on dick. He told me on one would take me in because no one loves me. I snapped. He was in my face and saying things like I deserved to be screamed at all night. At this point I was kicking and pushing for him to get away from me and verbally screaming this. He got directly in my face and I close fist punched him in the face. I’ve never done anything like this and I feel disgusted in myself. I know what I did was wrong. I came back to his place today and cleaned up the drunken mess for an hour. Cleaned up all his blood etc. (I don’t know if I actually made him bleed because it seems after he left he punched a bunch of walls). Leave before you do what I did. Leave before you lose yourself. Don’t stay until you have lost yourself completely.[/INST]Communication</s>