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My mother has told me time and time again that I should cut my younger brother some slack and "he's only insert number of years old!" after hearing that so many damm times I started to think, when I was the age he is, she was saying that I should cut him some slack, but nobody cut me any!!! I grew up always expected to be mature and intelligent. Over time the anger of always letting things go and not getting my way built up, and I would just explode with anger. My brothers and sometimes my mother would use that as ammunition and make fun of something that i now know was an actual problem, and to this day I have a hard time using words to express myself. | just treat your kids as equals to each other and don't expect one to be more mature just because of a small age difference, everybody needs their opinions to be respected. Sorry about the rant |
I attend a very competitive and rather cutthroat university. Like, our extracurricular clubs require multiple rounds of interviews to just be a part of. Long story short, this girl I am an acquaintance with (we've had some classes together, I've seen her around at parties) is completely lying about her experiences and resume on LinkedIn. She's pretending to be on the executive board of clubs she didn't even get into. She's pretending to be president of a club that she's not even in (and I know because I AM the president of that club). It's internship recruiting season right now, and I feel like she is getting an unfair advantage. Should I just get over it? | Girl from my university is lying about her experiences on linkedin, I know because she claims to be the president of a club that I AM president of. |
So, she's a virgin and we'd been holding back. After a fair amount of foreplay she says she wants to keep going. While it is her first time, it's been months since I'd had sex and was worried I wouldn't last long. On occasion in the past, I could sing a song in my head so I wouldn't focus solely on how it feels, gauge her reactions, and not finish too soon. When a nice rhythm started and she seemed to be enjoying it, a song popped in my mind. For some stupid reason that I haven't figured out yet, I started singing the Animaniac's President Song. So now I'm going at it to a beat thinking, "George Washington was the first, you see. He once chopped down a cherry tree..." It seemed stupid at the time, but because it was working and logic seemed less important, I kept going. The problem is, there are musical interludes and I have always had some trouble remembering how each stanza starts. Finally, I get the last part started but have spent so much time trying to remember, I've left my body on autopilot and was still going. By the time I realized it was still going on, she is still moaning and I got to, "and Kennedy had Camelot..." before immediately going soft. I pulled out and she opens her eyes and looks at me. I start giggling and then tried too explain it to her. - | I lost my erection mid thrust by losing focus on my gf and focused on a kids song. Update: this blew up way more than I though it would. Thanks for so many of you guys being so light hearted and supportive. |
We've been together for 8 years, married for 5. During that time my wife has become increasingly drawn into multi-level marketing schemes. She signs up, makes some initial money by marketing to friends and family, but then the market dries up because there's so many people doing it and everyone else has already been sold to by other sales people. Once the initial friends and family market dries up (i.e. they stop buying out of politeness) she gets drawn to another mlm scheme promising fortunes like the founder and five other people worldwide have made. In short, while its not costing us money (she pays off the joining 'kit' before the market dries up), its our friends and family she's making the money from, and I worry it's beginning to get them offside, particularly when to advance she needs to sign people up, and starts moving from sales to recruitment, the same friends and family. I want to be supportive, but the constant mlm sales pitches she's giving and leaving, then joining is getting old. How do i broach the subject without crushing her dreams? | wife keeps signing up to mlm schemes, its pissing people off because she keeps trying to sell the different schemes to different people, and I need to ask her to cut it out whilst still being supportive of her aspirations of starting a successful business. |
Just a few hours ago my coworkers and I from university were on the river about to haul the raft back onto the trailer, hooked to the truck that was parked on the boat landing hill. The truck brake gave out and it rolled into the river, filling the cab half way before the grad student got in and hit the breaks. I went swimming after the raft we had let go, and my other coworker gathered objects floating away from the truck bed. The nice thing that happened was that the assistant director of finances stopped soon after to help us out, calling her son to come haul us out with his truck. While waiting I tried to flag down other trucks on the road but everyone ignored me, I was freaking out. If she hadn't helped us so quickly then we would have been in so much trouble. | Truck went in the river and an awesome person helped us out when most people ignored us. I know I didn't do it, but I love her for making our day less awful. |
So my boyfriend and I have been together for 2 and a half years. We have a great relationship, and I can really see myself spending the rest of my life with him. But there's a few things we need to work on, and I've tried speaking to him about it, but it never seems to solve anything. So about 3 months into our relationship, he started commenting on r/gonewild, stuff like "you're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen" or "marry me please?". I didn't find out about this until probably a year into our relationship, and I chose to forgive him because I felt as though our relationship had grown and that we could move past it. He has quite a lot of female friends and there are a few that him and also his mother have commented on saying how beautiful they are, or how they're one of the most beautiful people they've ever seen. They've had conversations about this in front of me over dinner. Let's call her anne. The issue: I'm a very insecure person, and I realise that this is completely my problem and I need to find ways to deal with it, however it is quite difficult but I am working on it. He goes away for work a few times a year, and he always posts pictures of himself with a few girls (who are gorgeous btw) and he always makes status's on Facebook to show how much fun he's having. Now I wouldn't have such a problem with this, except whenever we go out and do something, he never once acknowledges it online or mentions it to anyone. And I feel like he's embarrassed by me. I found out tonight that he's been going through Instagram and liking the pictures of Anne that she posts. This wouldn't bother me so much, except this week was one of the weeks he went away for work, and while he was gone, I had a few things happen that caused me to be in tears for most of the time he was gone. While he was gone, he spared not even 5 minutes to give me a phone call and he had to get off the phone because he was going to a karaoke bar with some of the girls that he was with whilst on this trip. This made me feel as though he really didn't care that I was upset. I've also gained a lot of weight since we've started dating, and while I'm working on it, I'm still probably 35lb heavier than I want to be, and this girl who's pictures he likes is absolutely gorgeous. So I suppose my question is: how do I approach this topic with him without seeming petty and stupid? I know this seems like such an insignificant post, however it is really impacting my confidence and our relationship and I'd love some advice on how to mention it to him without it becoming an argument. | boyfriend likes pictured of girls and ignores me when he goes away but posts pictures online of himself with girls. This impacts my confidence and I'm wondering how to approach it with him? |
So my SO and I have been dating for 1,5 years now and we have seems to hit a rough patch regarding the distance (200 km) and my work ( i work in a hotel and have to work a weird schedule) and things are getting worse and worse day by day. I am in love with her and she says the same but i am getting confused, i have tried to explain to her that i try to see her as much as i can but sometimes it happens that we dont see each other for 3 weeks or so. and it is killing me because i know i might lose her but that is a thing which i am most afraid of. Other than that we don't have any major problems it is just this ting and it is killing me and i have no ideal how to fix it. Should i leave my job or what? Thanks for any comments. | distance and work problems - stupid schedule and we can not see each other so much (one weekend in 14 days is simply not enough) what should i do? |
I once worked for a company that offered services to websites. One of the services was to manage opt-in only online newsletters. At the very bottom of whatever newsletter, we had our basic company information, as a sort of "service provided by ___" type of thing. One day, a man calls me up all agitated. He says that his friend who runs a nightclub sent him an email telling him to get in touch with me so that "our companies can do business together". I ask him what he does, and he says that he is a nightclub promoter. I ask him what he's interested in from our company, and he says he doesn't know. He asks me for a pitch, so I explain to him what services we offer and point him towards our website. He doesn't understand how websites work, he says. That's why he called me. (This was in 2004, btw.) I tell him that if he doesn't understand how websites work, then we probably don't have any services to offer him, considering that the core business model of our company is to provide services to website admins. He begins to yell at me, because clearly I don't understand that his friend told him that we should do business together, and that if I want him to create a website, he'll think about it, but let's talk business. I ask him exactly who his friend is and what the email said. He forwards me some "Nightclub Hype Newsletter" (not the real name, I can't remember it) that was sent via our service. I try to explain that it wasn't a personal email and that we really have nothing to do with its content or nightclubs. He gets very angry and asks me to prove that our company is not some kind of scam. I explain again what we do, also explain some of the awards we had received and a few of our credentials. I note how we adhere to specific privacy standards and whatnot, and he flies off the fucking wall. "How do I know you aren't making these businesses up! I could say that I'm certified by whatever and make up a website for my fake certification and it wouldn't be true!" "Ok," I reply. "Maybe we're just not meant to do business together." "Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!" He yells. "I just want more information and you don't want to give it to me. How do I know if I want to do business with you without knowing more about your company? WHAT CAME FIRST!? THE BIRD, OR THE EGG?! THE BIRD, OR THE EGG?!" After this, I try to interrupt him to politely say goodbye a few times while he keeps screaming about "the bird or the egg" and eventually I have to hang up. | Nightclub "promoter" calls website services company to see if we can "do business together", doesn't know how websites work, yells at me about whether the bird came before the egg. |
My ex and I broke up 2 years ago because he was about to go to medical school and didn't want to be in a relationship. he felt he wouldn't have time for a relationship and it would be a long-distance since he was moving out of state so we broke up (after dating 4 years). We decided to stay friends because we didn't have issues against each other but just timing was wrong. End of last year, I realized I'd had enough of this friendship so I told him I didn't want to talk anymore and moved on. Last week, I Find out that he's been in a serious relationship with a new girl for a few months now and they're prepping to go on their first romantic getaway. He is still only a year into medical school and now he's in a serious relationship, which he didn't want. what's worse is that the girl DOES NOT live in his state, which means they're long distance (she lives in the same state as me). I don't know why after so long I'm hurt by this, but he ended our 4 year relationship because of no long distance and no time in med school but now is doing the exact same thing with the other girl. I talked to him a few days ago. I didn't ask him about his new girlfriend, but he told me everything and said "yeah it's not serious. i'm not doing anything else in life so i thought might as well date her.. and since she's in another state, it'll be easier to break up with her" I don't know what to believe but I want to move on. I just feel I Don't know the real reason for our break up anymore and it's hurting me/depressing me again. I just had started to move on last year. What should I Do? | Ex in a long distance relationship with a new girl during med school when told me he didn't want long distance or relationships during med school when we broke up after 4 years of dating. |
Long story short, there was this boy I liked. We were going to date around this time last year, but he moved for a few months outta state, and since my mum hated him, I saw no future for us. I told him this, told him I wasn't going to wait. Over the summer, I started dating someone else, and we had sex once. My crush came home in the fall, and found this out. He freaked out and "defriended" me.(for lack of a better word.) Three or so weeks ago, I decided to be his friend, try to see if we could make it work, because I really missed him. Over the few weeks he was slightly abusive, but I thought nothing of it,maybe it would pass. Three days ago he called me a cheating whore, not only because I had sex, but because I'm OK with sex before marriage. I decided enough was enough,and blocked him. He contacted me a few hours later, and told me he had a bad photo of me he snapped once, and if any more of my friends tried to chew him out again, he would show everyone. I told him everyone would leave him alone, and we could both just move on with our lives. Then I blocked him on skype too. Today I found out he sent my mom a screen cap of me asking him if the photo was of me sucking his dick. (Basically a written confession that I DID.) Then he sent a message to my sister, of a convo between me,him,and my friend, where my friend is talking bad about my sister. | Ex is now ruining my life, twisting my friends against me, and blackmailing me. The worst part? I don't know if he will ever stop. He's batshit crazy. Any advice? I'm crying over here, I just want this to stop. |
I am an older brother, a son and for the first ever time in my life, I will be moving out of my birth home, the place I have lived my entire life with my younger brother and sister, mother + father. It's extremely terrifying/unnerving/exciting, but one emotion has taken quite a toll on me, and that is sadness. My brother (23) and I (26) are the closet people we know. We do quite literally everything together. We have the same group of friends, same interests, both have girlfriends, go on double dates, basically what I am getting at is that he is a huge part of my life, and I am a huge part of his life. At the end of September, i will be moving an hour away from home to live with my girlfriend in a house that we are renting together. I am doing my best to get in all the brotherly hang out time as possible before I take my leave and it's somehow made us even closer! I am going to miss that bastard. Now here comes the hard part. Even being an hour away, my brother has said repeatedly that he will NOT visit me down where I will be living, ever. He has made his stand and will not back down and it's making me feel so fucking awful inside. I think about it all too often, and even now, sitting in my future living room while typing this, my eyes are swelling up with tears thinking about it. Of course there will be times I will be back home and hanging out with the family, and they have all even said they would come to visit, but not my brother. Reddit, my question is, how do I handle this! I am so miserable that it's going to make leaving THAT much more harder! I am already sad I won't wake up and see my 2 puppies and see my loving mother's face as I say "So long!" and leave for work, but able to come home and see them 8 - 10 hours later. What do I do? | younger brother said he will never visit me when I move out, even though I will only be an hour away and my friends and family at home, will come visit, but he won't. |
We were all drunk and he was sitting right there instigating it. She and I both consider ourselves straight. We live together and hosted a little kickback last night. Once everyone had gone home, it was just us and her boyfriend, who practically lives with us and is one of my best friends as well. I don’t remember how, but the topic of us kissing came up and he made it clear that he wanted it to happen. She and I started playing some “game” where the object was to bite the other one; it was pretty much just us rolling around on the floor, straddling each other, and giving each other hickeys. She also definitely sucked on my fingers a couple of times. Once that got tiring, we were just kind of sitting on the floor and he was on the couch, still talking about us kissing. So I gave her a quick little peck and thought that would be it. Nope. She leaned back in and we started actually kissing (with tongue). We stopped after not that long because we were laughing. Then about 10 minutes later, I kissed her again (open mouth) and she kinda groped my boobs because of some comment from him. I saw her this morning and we were joking and laughing about the whole thing, so I know it’s not going to be awkward between us. I’m still freaking out a little because I actually liked it and would be okay with it happening again. Before this, the closest I’ve ever got to questioning was having a sex dream about a female celebity. I consider myself pretty open minded but even when I thought of kissing a girl, the idea of doing anything further never interested me. Last night, that wasn’t exactly the case. I also haven’t seen him yet because he’s been at work, but when he gets home I’m sure he’ll bring it up and I don’t know how to respond. | I drunkenly made out/fooled around with my straight, taken best friend (with approval from her boyfriend). I consider myself straight but I liked everything that happened and would be willing to do it again. Now I’m freaking out. |
the economist Richard Vedder has written extensively about how so many college grads are working at jobs that don't require a college degree that college has passed a point of diminishing returns. I don't have the exact sources at hand and I'm too lazy to look it up, but he writes, for example, that large percentages of mailmen, cashiers, waiters, janitors, skilled trades workers, etc., have college degrees. these are all perfectly honorable jobs that can pay good wages. but it's a massive waste of resources when millions of people waste 4 years of their lives earning a degree that they don't need. that's 4 years they could be earning wages, saving for retirement, earning seniority, and avoiding student loans. | colleges are graduating more students than there are jobs for college grads. unless you're getting a free ride, go to a 1-2 year trade school to learn a practical skill. |
not true..one summer I was working for Immigration Canada as a co-op student, part of my job was to monitor the interviews just to see whats going on, its mostly just a few routine questions and we get a few relevant documents. 9/10 families/ people you meet you wouldn't mind being their niegbour, but every once in a while... ANYWAY so there was the guy from Pakistan who showed up one day, he was very devout fundamentalist islam type of guy. Anyway, we had problems before because he refused to allow his sister to take of her nijab so we could ID her, kept breaking appointments due to 'religious obligations' ect cct... So he shows up one Tuesday for the interview, refuses to answer some of the questions, is in general being a dick. My supervisor leaves to get a form this guy has to sign... this guy starts asking me for his social assistance cheques and getting really angry and belligerent about it, even though you have to be a citizen he 'wants it now" and he "knows I have it and that your not allowed to treat people like this and when my boss comes back he'll get me fired' Great, whatever. He moves to the waiting area, that was when I overheard him talking to another guy who I guess he assumed was on the same page, telling him he doesn't think 'our daughters' should go to school, because who will help his wife at home? Then the two of them 'quietly' have a conversation about public assistance, and how if you get a job once a year for 3 months and quit you'll always receive full benefits and wont have to get ever get 'a real job' Rage....RAGE. So when I was back in the office I looked through his file, made a few calls, turns out he had lied about not bieng married and none of his references checked out... he actually had his brother (under a different name) listed as his previous employer, who of course answered the phone with the wrong name. | Guy trying to get his citizenship, was a huge dick so I looked through his file, found out he lied about a few things and had his application terminated as a result, no Canada for him. |
Hi, I have been in love with my best friend since a long time ago, I have known her for around 8 years(met her in 9th grade in high school). I loved our relationship, she is in another university in another state, but we used to talk all days like 3-4 times a day. My love for her started around 4 years ago and I always thought I would never be able to tell her what I was feeling, but this last summer she came home for vacation and I told her. Her reaction wasn't what I was expecting, she told me I was confuse and she told me she only saw me like a brother( right in the heart) we continue talking like nothing ever happen, and I told myself everything was fine until I saw her again this Christmas break. I told her I couldn't pretend anymore, that I really loved her and that she was everything to me, this time she did kinda panic and told me that we should put some distance between us, and I agreed with her. I don't regret telling her my feelings, I regret ruining my friendship with her because we had something really cool. Even though I knew she didn't felt the same way I feel about her, I had to tell her what I was feeling. She was a big part of my life, and now she is just gone and I can't stop feeling like crap. I have been going out with other friends to clear my mind, but then at night when I'm about to go to sleep I feel this emptiness inside of me(at night it was when we used to talk more about how our day went and stuff like that). She told me we are still friends, and if I ever need something she would be there for me, but I know that’s just stuff you always say. I hate this because when she was feeling sad or depressed she would find support with me because I was always there for her, but now when I need her the most she cannot be there for me. | told my best friend that I have known for 8 years that I love her, she panic and told me cut contact with her for some time, now I feel terrible and sad.Did I did the right thing? what should I do. |
Hello Reddit. I need some perspective and some advice, please. I've (M36) been married (F36) for almost 9 years. We have two young kids 5 and under. However, I'm thinking of leaving my wife. I'm just not happy and haven't been for a long time (past two years mostly). There is no passion, and no shared interests other than our kids. We haven't had sex in about 4 months. I do have a sex drive but I usually please myself. Neither her nor I have even tried to initiate sex in all this time. Sex has never been great to begin with, as I am much more liberal and open, whereas she's more "vanilla". I don't feel there's ever been much chemistry in the sack. If you're thinking why I married her in the first place, we have a similar background, get along great and have always been good friends. We "made sense" together, and it was the right time for both. Some complications/background of the past year: I lost my job in April 2013. She's been the sole provider since then. I've been job searching, interviewing, and working on a consulting project, and staying at home with our kids. My wife has been mostly supportive, but still resents the situation because she wants to stay home with the kids. For the past 6 months she's been very stressed at work and very depressed. She's going to a therapist who prescribed anti-depressants. This has also brought my energy down significantly, on top of my struggle to find a job. I've tried to be supportive, as I've also been through depression, but it just can't handle any more negativity all day, every day. Additional info: I had a 6 month affair with a co-worker some time ago. I am not proud of it. However, my self-esteem was significantly improved by the affair, the sex was amazing, the conversations were great, and there was passion. I also did not feel judged, but rather understood and appreciated by the other woman. I also realize a 9 year marriage is not comparable to a 6 month affair, but I never had the aforementioned with my wife and made me realize what I had been missing. We decided to end it before anyone got hurt. My wife doesn't know and I do not plan on telling her. So, Reddit, I need some perspective. For the sake of our kids, I would like to work on improving my marriage. However, I don't think I will ever have that passion that I long for. So am I just being a pussy and I need suck it up and stick with her? If so, what can I do to make it better? Or should I follow my feelings and end it? BTW, I am totally devoted to my kids, and if my marriage ends I would plan on being present and sharing the responsibility of raising them and being there. Anybody else out there have a similar experience? | out of love with my wife of 9 years, I want to do the right thing for my family. What is the right thing? Can I get "that loving feeling" back? How? |
im working a job i absolutely hate. it's not the career i want. i just took it for the money but now the money is holding me back from leaving and taking up an internship or a job that pays substantially less but is what i want to do. i want to work in social media marketing. i spoke to my boss about it and he seems disinclined to help and is only interested in keeping me in this industry. however, i do have prior experience in the field but from 3 years ago. last month, i sent out over 300 applications and only received maybe 10 calls back and made it through the 3rd round of a few interviews only to be informed that they're not interested. what the fuck am i doing wrong? my mom died when i was a baby and the only family i have is my dad but he's moving back to his home country in less than a year for a new job and i'll be left here to take care of myself. on top of all that, my dog (my best friend) just died in an accident. i feel like my world is collapsing. its taking a huge emotional toll on me but i do my best to keep my head up and fake a smile, especially when im with my girlfriend, but its actually getting in the way of our sex life..basically can't keep it up cus my mind is elsewhere. i don't know what to do anymore. i'm not feeling suicidal. but i'm feeling extremely depressed. my girlfriend is the only one that makes me happy and i feel like if things dont get better, i'll lose her. i need advice. | hate my job. boss won't help. unable to change careers. dad is moving back to his home country and i'll be left alone. dog just died. can't keep it up during sex. feeling depressed and feeling lost. need advice. |
So before I start I should mention that I am bad with break ups. So onto the fu. So yesterday i moved into my new house and the girl i was seeing lets call her Emily came round to hang out before work. Everything was fine and we were having a laugh and then she went to work, then later on i check my phone and see i have a whats app message from Emily saying that we shouldn't see each other anymore cause she wasn't ready for anything. We messaged each other about it and decided to start again as friends and see if things progressed. I was ok with the idea although i asked if we could talk about this in person as i wanted to know why the sudden change. she said yes so we planned to meet up today, however i decide that i am ready for a drink and head to the bar round the corner from my house with my flat mate i had a few too many drinks and only remember parts of the night and realized that the bar i got drunk in was where Emily worked. Now she isn't answering my texts and i think i might have done something stupid and might have lost her forever. | The girl i was seeing wanted to just be friends, we agree to meet up and talk about it, i get drunk at the bar she works at, might have done something stupid, and now i think she is ignoring me. |
Hey guys, I really appreciate the discussion that may commence. I am planning on buying a laptop and a tablet. However I've become quite indecisive about which course (brand, type, etc) to take. First off, I have: A Desktop (built in the Spring of 2012 i7 3.4ghz, 16gb ram, gtx 570, 240ssd and 3.5TBhdd), a Laptop (Fall 2011 Lenovo, i7 2ghs, 4gb ram, Nvidia quadro 1000m, win 7 32 bit school version, 300gb hdd) Provided by my college, and my Smart Phone (Galaxy S) The desktop has its uses when I am home and I will occasionally multitask and have the laptop out. However because of the School version of win7 it's less than optimal and I need it to stay this way to have access to school network and software. So I then had an idea just to get my own personal one to do the job better. Laptop: School, Work, and Play. For classes I normally have it open doing something and I am on campus for the majority of the day. It would get quite the use. Tablet: Be there for notes, and for when a laptop isn't allowed in the class room but a tablet is as long as it is for notes. The tablet would also be my kin for reading on the go so carrying books isn't needed. Should I bother with either purchase, or are they rightfully justified? I've looked at Nexus, Transformer, and the Ipad. I am not a huge apple fan ... I don't have any of their product but from what I know it is probably the best tablet. It would be definitive if 1) I could sync google to it 2) use office applications 3) play GBA on it (Pokemons) I've scoured Lenovo, Asus, MSI, cyberpower, digitalstorm, sager, and ibuypower for a good build. I buy power had the best deal. However I seem to tend to always choose a high end laptop (around 1600 for ibuypower) Sorry for the long wall, but I wanted to be informative. | Want to buy laptop and tablet. Need constructive input on build and type. ibuypower has specials that end today at midnight. (saves a lot of money) Thanks all. |
One of my best friends is black and we were walking together to Safeway or some store and a woman with two children approximately ages (8-12) pulls them away from us and blatantly says about my friend "I don't want you near any black people, they're satan's children.." needless to say since I'm 6'4 I gave a face of pure anger and murder towards her. What's worse? Her husband (5'8 or so) approaches me some 10 minutes later whilst I'm looking for ties and tells me that if I don't straighten up and take my "black friend out of here" he's going to take this outside. At this point I didn't have a response because I was so appalled so we simply turned away from him and kept looking at ties. The rest is a whole 'nother story. | Woman pulls away children because my friend is black and thus "satan's child" according to her. Husband tries to be tough and tells me to take my black friend out of the store. |
Walking down some street in rochester and some guy jumped out of the alleyway with a knife and said in a very threatening tone "gimme all your money" So me being the poor money-less bastard that I am I told him "look man, I don't have any money" then he said "I SAID GIVE ME ALL YOUR MONEY!!" after that he tried to stab me in the chest but I moved so the knife went into my arm and the guy lost his nerve, so he started to run away and I decided to not follow him as I had a knife in my arm. About 20 minutes later I walked into the emergency room holding my right arm with my left hand and a bloody knife with my right hand, needless to say there was no 3 hour wait. They patched my arm with 8 stitches and 2 months later I was fine. After 3 years I still have that knife because it was a nice buck knife. Also I have a great story to tell. | some guy stabed me, he ran away, left the knife in me, I walked to the ER, 8 stitches, I still have the knife and a great scar and story. |
Most cancers have common actions in the body. This isn't an all inclusive description. Feel free to add. In general, a certain cell or tissue begins to grow out of control due to a mutation or a number of accumulated mutations. As it grows, it requires a source of energy. So, it pulls from your own energy stores. You become tired and lose weight. Depending on where the cancer is, it will obstruct other tissues. This will cause physical damage to other areas of your body. Prostate or GI cancer commonly produces blood in your stool due to obstruction (many things can cause blood in your stool, so don't assume cancer if you have it but get it checked out). You can imagine this type of thing would leave you more prone to infection. Your cancerous cells will grow and grow until they "metastasize" which means they spread to other locations in the body via the bloodstreams they then integrate with other tissues and begin cancerous growth there. Eventually, if a cancer is left untreated, it will spread to several places, grow further and starve your body systems as well as shut them down. Your depleted immune system will be fighting off an extra batch of pathogens thanks to the damage from your cancer. It's common for cancer patients to die of some infection because their body just can't fight it off amidst everything else going on. | Cancer spreads all over your body, compromising essential bodily functions. If cancer doesn't eventually shut the body down, it will leave the body prone to infections that it can no longer fight off. |
Hi r/relationships, I'm hoping y'all can help me with this. I've been talking to this great guy for a few months. I've never met someone I'm so compatible with - we really get along and have similar interests/ideals. The thing is, I'm about to transfer colleges back home (I go to an our-of-state college atm) and I don't want to commit to this person because I'm scared I'll meet someone better at my new college, or wherever. I feel awful that I have this attitude, but I don't want to hurt him. On another note, I don't particularly like the idea of relationships - at least for now. I've just been hurt a lot in the past and I feel I won't have the energy to put into another person for a while. I just want to have fun without worrying about committing to someone. I get this "trapped" feeling when I think of relationships (I feel like this happened because of a particularly clingy ex-boyfriend). | I don't want to commit to this great guy because I'm scared I'll meet someone better as well as for other reasons. Am I just being young and immature...? |
Yes I would. Me being 26, that would make her 50...and 1 year at 500k would get me to a pretty nice point in my life. With 500k I could pay off my student loans, pay off my car, and either buy or put down a great deposit on a house. After that No I likely wouldn't have anything left over but if I did, I could go back to school, learn some new things, and progress as a person. Are you allowed to see other people when she doesn't need you there? Am I allowed to do the things I want to do while she is at work all day? -Regardless of those answers I would probably do it just for the effect it would have on my future as far as stability goes. Who knows, you could end up working at a company you hate, essentially living there for a year dealing with people you deem 4's with a crappy sense of humor, though without the sex. | Yes I would do it, it could end up being just like work at the company you would otherwise be employed at, but with sex. |
So off the bat I was very hesitant to have my boyfriend of 7 months meet my parents. They're devout Christians who also are extremely traditional. But eventually when the time came around, it went less than ideal, as I expected. My boyfriend, like me, was raised in the church but doesn't practice as much. They thought him to be disrespectful because he didn't take off his sunglasses upon meeting them (the sun in his eyes really bothers him and he may also suffer from social anxiety). He even bought my mom a rose, only to be accused of trying to buy their favor! To top it off, my parents disapprove of him because he's white (we are black; to be honest, they would not be happy unless my s/o was black as well). This is killing me because I can't help who I am into. Easy fix would be to let go of it all, but I love my parents very much and it's important to me to have their approval. Without it, they can do things like financially cut me off or even ostracize me altogether. This whole thing is causing me a great deal of stress. I need my family to be on board with my s/o. I don't want to have a strained relationship because they can't accept him. | My family wont accept my boyfriend because he's white and do not live up to their traditional standards, and it's tearing me apart. How do we overcome this? |
I spent 4 years as a teacher in an afterschool program at an elementary school. In Florida, we often have very rainy afternoons so it is commonplace for there to be large, outdoor, covered areas with concrete floors near the playgounds to accomodate for inclement weather. There was one african american child who every single day would run through the covered area out to the playground doing cartwheels, backflips and handstands. Granted, at face value that really doesn't sound like much but when you work at a public school, safety is of the highest importance and I was not about to let some kid get his head busted open on my watch. So everyday I'd tell him to stop, (usually something to the effect of " __ , you know you're not supposed to be doing that. Stop, please or you'll have to go to time out"), and everyday he would get so angry that he'd cry, and storm off. Most days it wouldn't end there and he'd have to be told several times to stop potentially dangerous behavior of all sorts (climbing on tables, jumping off of the top of playground equipment, throwing balls indoors, etc) and he would eventually have to be sat in time out. I brought his behavior to the attention of my director and other teachers to keep an eye out for. My director had brought it up to the kid's mother briefly and she said that she would address it but nothing ever changed. Again, I was not going to let a kid get his head busted open on my watch, so I kept making him stop. One day the kid's mom comes in and wants to speak with me. She proceeds to go on and on and on about how she doesn't understand why I'm picking on her child. She's also a teacher at another school, so I try to explain the reasons why I'm constantly getting on to him. She then tells me that it must be some sort of "cultural difference" that is motivating my "targeting" her child. This continues on and she until she then flat out calls me a racist. After about 20 minutes of her rambling I'd had enough of my character being bashed and her accusing me of something I wasn't doing so I flat out told her that my actions weren't racially motivated in any way but she was free to think whatever she wanted. I assured her that I would happily turn a blind eye to her kid and not waste my breath on a kid that wasn't going to listen to me anyway, but that would set an unfair precedent for the other kids and they would think that that kind of behavior was acceptable. So as long as my job was to keep her child and all other children safe while on school property I would continue making him stop any potentially hazardous behavior and if she had a problem with that then she was free to take it up with the principal. | Constantly getting on to a kid, kid never stopped doing certain things, kid's mom called me a racist for targeting her child, I told mom to piss off |
As a Polish person, I honestly don't see a problem with it. Where I live, it's very uncommon not to drink alcohol before the age of 18 - and yet, I haven't noticed any serious individual or social issues caused by that. Teenagers don't drop out of schools and ruin their lives because of alcohol. Usually the most serious problem caused by underage drinking is pissing off parents. At my "high school" the idea of a party was gathering at one person't place and getting shitfaced. Was it a school for disadvantaged kids with "issues"? Fuck, no - it was a kind of elite school where only top students from the whole voivodship (provice) could get into, with lots of science olympiad winners, uniforms and whatnot. People from my area are more impressed when I mention my high school than when I mention my university degree. Naturally, most graduates went to state (i.e. best) universities afterwards, and getting drunk in teenage years, like any other Polish kid, didn't interfere with it. Those American stories about college parties are ridiculous to me. Here, at the age of twenty-one, people generally have enough drinking experience to know how to handle alcohol and don't feel the need to drink themselves unconscious to show how grown-up they are. I've heard a lot of drunk stories but I don't know any involving public humiliation, puking all over a friend's flat etc. from my immediate environment. Yeah, I did once puke in a wrong place, but I was 14, and since then I've always managed to reach the toilet. In fact, I think it's much better to do stupid irresponsible things under influence as a teenager than as an adult. If you embarrass yourself at 15, you'll laugh at it in 5 years. If you embarrass yourself at 22, people will laugh at you in 5 years. A drunk teen won't drive a car - he or she has no driving licence (here, you need to be 18) or a car. Going to school with a hangover won't have as serious repercussions as going to work with a hangover. Actually, most stupid things you might do won't matter after all. Plus, it's safer for a girl to get drunk unconscious on a party with insecure 16-year-old male classmates than with 22-year guys. | In Poland most people drink before the legal age and they turn out just fine, so I don't think giving booze to a teen is such a horrible thing. |
TIFU is one of my favorite subs and today I finally have something terrible and stupid to contribute to the wonder of this subreddit. No alt account, either. Let this TIFU be tied to me forever. So I had my first interview with a job three weeks ago. They were great and called me back the next week to schedule a second interview. June 27 at 8 a.m. Well, when I looked at the calendar I placed the 27th, in my brain, on Friday. I have even scheduled things on my calendar on my phone a couple times since then and didn't notice that, oh hey, the 27th fell on THURSDAY. I don't know what my brain did or why, but I continued thinking that the 27th was on Friday. FRIDAY. Obviously, it's not. So at around 11 a.m. this morning I realized my error with a thundering horrifying realization. I called, left a message but haven't heard anything back. I kind of don't expect to hear anything positive but I DO want to apologize for standing them up. I HATE when people do that to me. It WAS a part time position with no benefits that would never become full time. BUT I thought I could work with it financially. But I did have my doubts. DM/SS: doesn't matter/still stupid. | TIFU. :( UPDATE: Well, fuck! I called twice and left voice mail and nothing. I emailed the person I interviewed with and apologized PROFUSELY and he called me! THIS IS BACK ON BABY!!!!! WHOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! UPDATE 2: Didn't get it. ON TO THE NEXT ONE!!!!!!!!!!! |
I was just reading a reddit article on lobbying while studying for a microeconomics exam when I realized that in general lobbying anywhere in the world vaguely similar to a simultaneous game in game theory (there are sequential elements). In such a game the payoff to any player (the donators) is the increase in income (capital gains, profit etc) from a new law (p_j for person j). However, the donations for each person is unique (call d_j cost for person j) The issue here is that any one person will try and maximize his or her returns while minimizing donations. Does this imply that in such a game, there will be a nash equilibrium at low levels of donations? And that the natural state of any lobbying is that people choose their best strategy (donating minimum for minimum returns?) If so, then doesn't corporate lobbying remove the burden of choice of how much to spend from players? This inturn would imply that the corporate heads of the firm can force a nash equilibrium with higher expenditures and returns (something similar to collaboration in repeated simultaneous move games) If anyone here is an expert in game theory; can you perhaps give a better model than the one i have suggested? I am sure they exist somewhere. They probably model it as a sequential game though. EDIT: grammar EDIT2: please note that this entire game is about the donators to ONE particular lobby. Imagine a particular lobby "XYZ", where there are N donators. These N people would choose to give the exact amount that maximizes their own returns. The game between lobbies and industries is another level altogether. In my game no one opposes each other, there is no win/lose. Only different levels of return on 'investment'. Corporate lobbying groups bypass this particular problem by spending out of their own coffers (i.e. taking money that would otherwise go to the owners, employees and other donators and giving the optimum amount to the lawmakers). Thus they are able to raise more money than normal lobbying groups | Corporations can force a certain 'donation' from shareholders/ employees to maximize returns to the corporation, thereby improving their returns as compared to another lobbying firm which depends on voluntary donations everytime. Does this seem like a good basis of a game theory analysis of the situation? |
I will try to make this as short and sweet as possible. I dated this guy for about three years. We broke up in January(I broke up with him), but after having some time apart, we started talking again in March. And since then we have become just like a couple again. It has now been four months. I have asked him two or three times when/if we are going to get back together and each time he just says he doesn't know, or that peoples opinions are in the way, such as his friends and family. I understand why they are skeptical, I broke up with him and now I want him back, but still. I asked him if he loved me enough to forget about what they think and he always says he doesn't know and isn't sure. Which makes it worse. He tells me to keep fighting for him, but honestly after this long it doesn't feel like I should have to. Please help. | ex can't put others opinions aside to be with me *edit- I broke up with him because I was having family issues. I couldn't handle everything emotionally, it was tearing me apart. |
I have been in a very happy relationship for almost a year now. He has helped me through a lot of crap that goes on in my house, and I love him more than anything. He is my world, and i want nothing more than a future with him. But I feel like i am just screwing everything up. There is a situation going on where my parents are trying to split us up... and I feel like it is all my fault. I know that we both really need to spend time together, and knowing me the longer we go separated without time together, the more i will beat myself up and be negative... this entire thing is my fault. But i'm also screwing up because i feel like i am ruining his happiness. I am on the swim team, and he hasn't really been able to go to my meets, especially home meets since this situation with my parents. So i have an away meet, and i wanted him to go. But apparently he is already going to a concert. Yea i'm really disappointed that he can't go because right now that is probably the only time i will be able to see him outside of school for a while... but i feel bad because i am just making him feel bad about the situation... he even said so. I didn't mean to... i didn't want him to feel terrible. No i feel like the biggest b ** and the worst girlfriend in the world. I can't even make my boyfriend happy. | Mandatory summary/question! What do I do? Am i doing something wrong, and if so what can i do to fix it? Or am i just letting my head play games with me? |
You don't know how hard it can be to roll on a too small condom, it's like putting on a nylon glove that's too small. Yeah whatever, they are extremely stretchy and shit, but they can be pretty fucking hard to put on if they are small. Condoms can have the problem that when you are midway through rolling them on, they get stuck and squeeze your dick, after that it's pretty much impossible to do anything else than just tearing it off. | condoms may fit over heads, but rolling them on is not so easy if they are too small. This only applies to circumference though, length is not a problem, not for me atleast. source: have big dick |
I have been dating this girl for about 3 weeks now. We get along very well, like most new couples do, but we have some very key differences. Basically, everything that matters for long term success. She is a Christian and I am an Atheist. She's basically very conservative with her lifestyle and I am much more liberal. An example of this is with homosexuals and drugs use. I'm very open towards gay people and I've had several gay roommates. I have no problem with their sexuality because, to me, love is love. However, she finds them disgusting and thinks homosexuality is a sin. Drug use is basically the same idea. While I don't use it, I have no problem with marijuana and other "soft" drugs, while she is very against all drugs. Finally, we have different views on sexuality as well. I have no problem with sex, as long as you do it the right way. Basically, you don't get a girl drunk to sleep with her, you're honest with your intentions and you always use a condom. Therefore, my number is quite a bit higher than hers, with myself standing at 25 while she is around 4-5. Basically, we get along personality wise and the sex is amazing, but differ in those key areas. Since we just started dating, I'm slowly finding these things out. I'm not sure how to end things or whether or not to try to make things work. Any advice would be welcome. | Dating for 3 weeks Girl and I differ on key values such as religion, views on homosexuality, drug use and sexuality. However, we get along very well and enjoy each others time. Not sure what to do. |
65 million years ago, an asteroid more than 10 kilometers in diameter and weighing several billion tons slammed into the Earth at a speed of over 20 kilometers per second. This asteroid (known today as the Chicxulub Impactor), was responsible for the extinction of the dinosaurs, and allowed for the rise of mammals which ultimately lead to the emergence of human life. While interesting, this is all fairly common knowledge. Less common is the knowledge that when you hit the Earth with several billion tons of space rock, several billion tons of crustal material gets excavated and ejected out into interplanetary space, escaping Earth completely. Most of this material would have been rock, but a non-negligible amount of biomass would have also come along for the ride, in the form of terrestrial microbes. Now, although much of this material probably would have ended up on the moon, or stayed near the Earth's orbit, some of it would have migrated further out into the solar system to eventually be deposited on Mars and even more distant worlds like Jupiter's moon Europa. What's amazing about this is that experiments have shown that microbial life is surprisingly resistant to the vacuum of space, and under the right conditions, could survive such a trip to the outer solar system, effectively seeding Earth life onto other worlds. So as we reach out and begin to explore further into our own cosmic backyard, we may find that we were not the first earthlings to do so after all. | The asteroid that killed the dinosaurs basically sneezed Earth-borne bacteria out into the rest of the solar system, possibly spreading life to other potentially-habitable places like Europa. |
I was at a house party a couple years ago and one of the guests got like, alcohol poisoning levels of wasted. It was late at night and the hosts had both gone to bed, and only four guests were still there: me, wasted guy, a friend's boyfriend, and another guy. Wasted Guy was passed out on the floor and Other Guy was packing up to leave when Friend's BF and I noticed Wasted Guy was vomiting into his own mouth while passed out on the floor. So we rolled him onto his side, but he rolled back onto his back. We repeated this a couple times before realizing this was not working. So we decided this guy needed to be relocated. The two of us picked him up and carried him upstairs to the only bathroom, and put him in the bathtub. Wasted was still puking everywhere and had puked on Friend's BF's shirt, so he took his shirt off. We decided we needed to strip the guy down and hose him off or something, but I was wearing a nice dress and didn't want water or puke on it, so I took it off. Moments later, one of the hosts opened the bathroom door to see what the hell was going on, and sees me in just my underwear, my friend's boyfriend shirtless, and both of us bent over the side of the bathtub and disrobing Wasted Guy who is still unconscious. | Someone busted into a bathroom at a houseparty to find me mostly naked in the shower with a friend's shirtless boyfriend and another unconscious guy. |
The fans aren't really that good (at least not at the properties I have worked at). They're fine if you're taking a shower and the water temp is hot, but not scalding. If you have a smoke room and people are going in and out all night with the water cranked up to get the steam, the little fans can't keep up. We had a couple of our employees get canned for using their discounts at another property and ruining the wallpaper this way. | Those fans aren't very strong and won't help as much as you'd like if you're going to be running the shower for an extended period of time. |
Four months old when it started (we'd only had her a month after adopting from spca), Effie seemed like after she'd run around/jump in the air after toys A LOT (lots of activity), she'd just stop and lie down, then roll on her side and look like she was falling in and out of sleep, or sometimes not responsive. I'd notice her back legs twitching a little and then she'd poop, not even knowing she was doing it. After a few more minutes, she'll get up and be quiet for a bit, but then after about 10 minutes, she'll be her usual self. One time she made a loud cry, and I went over and she was having what seemed to be a full on seizure, just laying there like the other times but completely unresponsive and acting like she was seeing things darting back and forth that weren't there. We took her to the vet after that and they said she was epileptic and put her on phenobarbital. It had been awhile since she had "an episode" (about a month), but this evening it happened again. She was laying down with her right leg pushed really far forward in an abnormal position. We picked her up and her legs seemed to be completely paralyzed for a few minutes (which we think is the case every time it happens). It seems like the speeding up of her heart rate ("intense activity") may have something to do with it, but we're not sure. Anyone out there have a clue as to what else this could be??? I know the best advice is to talk to the vet, but I'm unsure if his diagnosis was correct and thought I'd crowd source before trying a different vet. Thanks! | Sometimes (1-4 weeks) when my cat has intense physical activity, she will lay down on her side, her legs twitching and then seeming to go completely numb, sometimes breathe heavily, poop without seeming to notice it happening, and continue laying there for 5 minutes. |
I have been friends with this girl for about six very flirtatious months. Recently, I have moved away and things have gotten much more serious despite the distance. I have seen her every weekend since I have moved (four weeks ago) and plan to continue to do so. We have talked about a future together and talked about how much we both love spending time together. The problem, however, is that she has a boyfriend who she does not seem to be able to break up with. She has told me that she is trying, but that it is very hard, which I get because they live together and have been together for a number of years. I don't know what I can do in this situation, or what exactly is going on in her mind. How can she tell me that she wants to be with me, but then still go home and stay with her boyfriend. | I have started seeing a girl who has a boyfriend. She has told me on multiple occasions that she wants to be with me and has tried to break up with her BF, but still has not. What is going on and what can I do? |
Hello all, I've been in a relationship with my S/O for a year and a half now, and I need some advice on how to break up with her in the least confrontational way possible. She currently lives with me and won't be able to move out for a month or two, so I do not want to end things in a fight or on negative terms if I can avoid it, but I think that it's time for us to both start searching for someone who can provide what we need. My SO is head strong about getting married, and I am not so sure that I am ready for that step. She wants to be engaged ASAP and I want to wait until I'm more stable in life to make such a serious commitment. Last night she asked if I would be ready to purpose withing 3 months, and I said that I wasn't sure when I'd be ready. I could tell that saying this hurt her, but it was the truth from my heart. Here's what I have thought of saying so far: "Hey SO, we need to talk" (I can see fighting starting here, since we all know what that means) "I don't think that we are right for each other right now. I love you, but I am not ready to get married yet. Being with you has made me a better person, and I cannot thank you enough for that." I want to say more, but I don't know how to. I want to keep it short too because I know there will be tears and probably some fighting or at least some time spent making me feel bad, which I deserve for leading her on for so long. She deserves better than that. Some other things I would like opinions on: 1) What's it like living with your ex? She will have her own room, but we will cross paths many times in the month or two it takes her to move out. 2) How do you deal with getting over break ups? I've only ever had one other serious relationship and it took years to get over. 3) Do you have any other advice for me? I'm nervous because she has become intertwined with my family and I have spent quite a bit of time with hers. She knows and like my friends, and they all know and like her.... There's so much that will have to change. 4) Where do I find the balls to do this? I try to avoid confrontation as often as I can, and I often cower in situations like this because I hate hurting people... help Thanks for reading I appreciate it. I know this won't be easy, but I think it's the best thing for us. | Need to know how to break up with live in GF of 1.5 years with out causing a massive fight. She will be unable to move out for at least 1 month, probably 2. |
While I have opinions that are counter to many of the things you've said, and my disagreement started long before you so nicely pointed out I might not like you based on the latter opinions, one of my biggest issues is with the wording and mindset of statements like > Since there is no legitimate reason for an assault weapon outside of that You have simply decided that you are the authority on "legitimate reason." You later say you don't trust your aunt to take down a shooter in a scenario like the recent one, because you have decided it's most likely that she'd miss, hurt someone else, or become a target herself. Even supposing that, in that extremely stressful scenario, you are correct that her firearm use would be ineffective, does that mean that there are no self-defense situations where she COULD effectively prevent harm to herself with a firearm? Either way, the reason I strongly disagree with you on concealed carry is that you feel like your personal "with humans" experience is enough to justify denying ME and all the humans I know who don't fit into anything you've described the right to an extremely effective method of self defense. That's not an appropriate way to look at a broad issue. I've known lots of drinkers that have driven drunk. I've known lots of drug users that have gotten in fights. I've known lots of cigarette smokers who shoplifted. I've known lots of BMW drivers who are just assholes. In the same way, there's no legitimate use for a BMW, their only legitimate use is the exceed safe speeds everywhere all the time. There's no legitimate use for alcohol or drugs, they just make you impaired and more likely to do something stupid. etc etc. | I disagree with your reasoning for many of these things, but am tired and unsure of my ability to articulate anything. Personally, I'm all for responsible responsibility. |
HFCS is produced by enzymatically altering the glucose from corn into a mixture containing mostly fructose and some glucose. Cane sugar (sucrose) consists of a fructose molecule and a glucose molecule bound together. The main difference is that HFCS is mostly fructose (I think around 70%, but it's been a long time since I took biochemistry) and sucrose ends up as a 50/50 mix of fructose and glucose. Now, why is that extra fructose bad? The biggest negatives I have heard about fructose are that (1) it doesn't trigger the release of insulin, which would in turn trigger the breakdown of other sugars and fats, and (2) it is initially metabolized in the liver pre-phosphorylation, so it bypasses the main negative control of glucose metabolism, providing lots of fodder for fat synthesis. Now the 'good' news: so far the long-term negative effects of HFCS have only been shown in animal models. In humans, pure fructose has been shown to have these effects, but I was only able to find short-term studies comparing HFCS to sucrose, and all of those showed that there wasn't much of an immediate difference in blood chemistry. | 1) HFCS has a higher proportion of fructose; (2) fructose is bad; (3) it still isn't 100% clear if the difference in fructose concentration is enough to trigger the negative effects. |
Basically it's as the title says. She quit her job due to sever depression for which she needed serious psychiatric help. I was, and have been, more than supportive of her. However, she's done not a whole lot to get us some income in the past month and a half and we're at our wits end. We have $100 to cover food and bills for both of us and our dog for the entire month of May. She tried to get on EI, but she needed a slip from her old job. She called them twice, and never again. They couldn't process her EI claim until they got it which she didn't find out until she called them more than a month after starting her claim. Now she can't get EI until at least the end of the month because the only person who's legally allowed to issue her that slip at her old job is on vacation. She said she was going to get a micro loan ($500) from our bank to help us out so we're not so strung out. I've asked her three times this week and she hasn't done it. | how do I talk to my wife that her inability to help out with finances (which my income can't cover) is not okay, and that she's kinda letting us down? |
Just used the GF descriptor in title to make it easier to read. We have had no talk about actually being GF/BF. For the last couple of months I've been dating this great girl. Smart/ funny etc etc we have been getting along extremely well. We are both fairly guarded people, and while we truly enjoy each others time, we still have some barriers up. Although the walls are coming down at a nice natural pace and I don't think either one of us could be happier with how things are progressing. Tomorrow I have to go in for a colonoscopy. She has asked to pick me up from the procedure and has been really sweet with making me my final meal and checking in on me to make sure I'm feeling ready for it. But I don't know if I'm ready to let her see me in a drugged up state. I think part of the reason why she likes me is because I am very stereotypically masculine in that I always try and have everything in control and can handle myself in any/ all situations. I'm worried that when she see's me in such a weak state where I am so co-dependent I wont be sexy to her anymore. I think it's too early to let her see me like this. Should I have her pick me up? Or should I cancel at the last minute and have someone else pick me up? | Girl I started dating 2 months ago wants to pick me up from my colonoscopy, but I'm worried that she'll see me in my weak state and be less physically attracted to me. |
When I was in the Navy, I got to go to Israel. Me and a couple of buddies went to investigate the local culture. We ended up imbibing the alcohol beyond our limits and got the great idea to find some local girls to hook up with. A couple of hours later and some drunken staggering, we managed to find two girls who were down for some action (mind you, there was five of us). This one girl, named Adara had the most awesome hips, perfect size tits and this beautiful green/hazel eye color. Along with dark black hair. Beautiful hair. Her friend was a bit of a chubby, but we said fuck it and went on to adventure into debauchery. I was getting pretty dizzy headed, but I remember being fixated on Adara. She kept looking at me and smiling the whole night. We went to a few watering holes throughout the evening and I started to feel sick later on. It was then that I suggested we find a hotel room and bed these girls. My buddy J paid for a two-bed room, said we'd probably stay long enough to sober up, fuck the chicks, leave 'em and head back to the ship. I puked in the hotel lobby and had to basically be carried into the room. Adara, who's English was perfect kept asking me if I was okay and such, kept patting me on the back while I sat in those uncomfortable chairs that hotels always have in the rooms. Eventually I passed out for a bit. Some undistinguished amount of time later, I awoke to the sound of screaming and laughing and bantering. I opened my eyes to see Adara fisting her friend on the bed while my buddies were standing around them jerking off, totally nude. Doing what any reasonable drunk would do, I tried to stand up and get some action, only to become dizzy headed and fall back into the chair. Next morning: The fellas said it was a good time but the girls left after I puked on myself and they had to clean me up, which I knew was a lie and they were trying to cover juicy details. | Got drunk, passed out, woke up in the hotel to see my buddies jerking off while a beautiful Israeli chick fist fucked her friend, buddies acted like nothing happened |
Dating for a couple months now and have been head over heels for this woman. Dates were always great, never an argument, even just hanging out at the apartment was always a great time for the both of us, or so I thought. I recently stayed at her place this past weekend to watch her dogs while she was on vacation. It went perfectly fine, and had given her a not when she left which the envelope that said "Open when you miss me" with a letter inside that talked about how happy I've been since I met her, etc. She told me she loved it. When she returned, she was very happy to see me, we went out for dinner, and after dinner I went home. Since then she has been very distant. She would usually text me or snapchat me multiple times a day, but now texts were only one or two word responses and when I asked if she'd like to grab dinner later in the week her response was "We'll see." She sent me a text earlier this evening just saying hey and asking what I was up to. I told her I had just come back in from a run to blow of some steam, and when she asked me what I was steamed about I told her I was a bit confused and irritated about how she had been acting the past few days. This is when she tells me she's not sure she can have a relationship right now because she needs to focus on herself in improving her insecurities. I'm pretty devastated at this point. I haven't felt this strong of a chemistry with someone since my early twenties. It's hard for me to find people I click well with in the area I live in, so when I find someone I grow attached pretty quickly. Love may be too strong of a word, but I definitely saw a future with this woman. The whole "focus on myself" feels like a load of bullshit. Being in a relationship, should I not be her support, the one who listens to her and helps her with the insecurities she may have, since I've fallen for this girl exactly the way she is? I feel I must have done or said something wrong, or that maybe there's just something about me that suddenly put her off, but it could be improved on. I'm not sure how to proceed from here. The conversation was all done through texting, so completely void of any real emotion or tone. I'd like a face to face conversation. Some of my belongings are at her place. Do I ask to pick up my things and try to initiate a conversation when getting them? Should I do so now or wait some time? Should I just forget about her and my things and attempt to move on, or could this perhaps just be a matter of patience? | Building a fantastic relationship with a woman, who then suddenly states she can't have a relationship because she neds to focus on herself and her insecurities. No prior arguments, nothing but good times. Any advice and thoughts are greatly appreciated. Thank you for reading. |
Update on this thread: So, long story short: met this girl in a class at college, we hit it off, I asked her if she wanted to go grab coffee some time, she said yes, I got her number. Now I'm nervous. Here are some concerns: I got her number and she said she'd want to have coffee with me some time. However, we didn't choose a specific time, because I had asked her out (something which I've never done before) and I was too emotionally drained (because it took a lot out of me) to figure out when this coffee date would be. I'm thinking Friday would be good. I see her in class again tomorrow (or today, if you're reading this on Thursday, 1/17/13,) so should I bring it up in person after class? Or should I call/text her outside of class to set it up? When I asked her, she said it would be good for her because she could "practice her English" (she's an immigrant and English isn't her first language.) Did she miss the fact that I was trying to date her? Or was she saying it to avoid seeming too eager? It's the same thing with my suggestion that it would be nice to show her around the town. I don't know if this will make it seem less like a date...I'm just afraid here that I may have friend-zoned myself. I have no idea whether I should pay for her or not. I don't know if she expects it or not...I mean...like, seriously. I'm not made of money, but I'd pay for her if it had any chance of improving my status with her. | This is my first date ever , with anyone , so I'm understandably nervous. Need typical advice on first date related stuff. Also afraid that I may have friend-zoned myself, that she doesn't see it as a date, etc. |
Hey, I've never posted on reddit before but now I feel like I should talk about my bf... So, some facts first: We're together since 3 month, everything was very quick, he's my first bf, he's 26, I'm 18, we met on a dating site... Well, I love him. I know its a big age difference, but he looks and behaves way younger, my parents and his parents are okay with it, so that's not the problem... But the thing is... he loves one of his ex girlfriends. The "perfect" one. The hot, sexy one with piercings. He showed me pics of her naked. He asks me if I would get tattoos or piercings like her. He checks her WhatsApp everyday, saves all her profile pics and texts with her sometimes. He doesn't hide loving her. He says he will never trust a girl again (not even me) because he did it once and got smashed and "girls are all the same and will run off one day". I don't want to ever leave him, I want to spend every second of my life with him. One day when we were cuddling in bed and listening to love songs he started to cry because of her... He's not the typ boy who would cry in front of anyone, so I was kinda shocked, but didn't say anything. His ex is engaged to another guy in prison (because of bodily injury), has a child and doesn't seem to want anything of my bf. I really don't know what to do now or if I should do anything at all or just wait. I'm kinda confused because I've never felt that way before. I want him to trust me and would give him the time he needs... but on the other hand I want him to stop talking to his ex or even think about her and love me the way I am. But now I have doubts about me, about my look and if I might be too childish for my bf and that he might not love me. What to do? | My 8 years older bf still loves his hot, sexy, "perfect" ex, who's engaged to another man and has a child and therefore seems not to want anything of my bf. I don't know what to do. |
Hi Everyone! So I recently broke up with my girlfriend of 1 year, and now I'm really lost and don't know what the heck to do. I'm 26M who has been in relationships since I was 16. I was with my previous girlfriend for over 8 years and when we broke up I was only single for about 6 months before finding my next gf 26F (current ex). I guess I'm here to ask for advice on what to do? I truly love my ex and she was an amazing, and supportive girlfriend. I broke things off because I felt like I wasn't ready and told her I felt like I was getting older and hadn't fully experienced the single life. At that time I wanted to be single and be able to go out, but now I don't know if I made the right decision. I feel very lonely, and want to return to her, but don't think it's fair to be playing with her emotions like that. We used to live together, I moved out once we broke up. Now I'm living at my parents. We've been apart for about 1 week now. I guess I'm scared to be alone? I mean relationships is all i know, so I've never really had to stand alone. Like I said, she's a great girl! Life was definitely easier with her. I had a good girl who loved me for who I was. Now I feel like It's too late to experience what I have left of my 20's. I guess I just don't know what I want. I look at it this way, I'm 26, make about 2k a month after taxes / deductions, live at home, and drive a car I cant afford. I'm in college and have about a year left until I graduate with my degree. Who wants that? Should I return to the comfort of my ex who already loves me and gives me what I want? | Broke up with my gf of 1 year and now I dont know whether I should return to her or get to experience the single life. |
not the first place i went but ill tell the story of my first joyride/road trip Parents were going to be away for a week 2 summers back and me and a buddy were just hanging out playing video games when the conversation broached the topic of a road trip to visit some friends we hadn't seen in years (like pre high school) but we're still really close to. so after the 3 hour drive to where they lived. Hung out with them all day in town. Between the 6 of us we probably downed about 5 cases too many cans of monsters... so fast forward a few hours to when we were trying to sleep. We can't obviously after the amount of monster we had. so we all pile into the car and drive around the country/mountain side all night. get home 2 days later after doing the same thing the next night. I had put over 2000km's on my mom's car. They were a tad pissed off. (actually they were furious but that's besides the point) In the end though I think it was worth it, cause I met some people I never would have other wise had the chance to meet and am best friends with a few of them even though me and aforementioned buddy had a falling out.(our interest's grew apart as well so that didn't help either) we are still friends just we don't hang out as often as we did back then. | parents were away. went on road trip/joyride. ran up the mileage on parents car. made some life long friends. had a slight falling out with my then best friend |
Typo wealth There are quite a few of us in this family (34, 31, 29, 28, 26, 22, 20, 16 & 15) and I am 24. Our parents started when they were very young, to put it lightly. One of my older brothers Ashton (28) is a very successful business owner and makes a lot more money than any of us make in a year at our jobs. He enjoys buying pricey things for himself, and frequently spends quite some money on me, and our two youngest siblings Macy (16) and Danny (15). He gives me my own portion of his money to save/spend whenever I want. He does favor us three out of all of our siblings, and doesn't attempt to hide it from everyone else. Our parents were abusive toward him during his childhood, and our other siblings, even some of the younger ones kinda followed along with them when they became older. This followed him into adulthood (not the physical abuse), but being excluded from family events and talking about him behind his back. We were both particularly close throughout our childhood, as well as when our baby siblings came along we became very protective of them. Of course when he began to become successful and earn more money is when everyone began treating him well. Our parents are still trying to pay off debt and most of our siblings are either still living at home or struggling to pay their bills. Ashton doesn't help them at all, which I understand. I currently live with him, as well do Macy and Danny (who got removed and placed with us due to neglect/abuse). I've gotton calls and many texts from the family telling me that we're selfish, a "disgrace"to the family, we "stole" their kids, and that even if Ashton doesn't help, I should at least lend some money to them so they don't become homeless (that's how bad their financial situation is at the moment). I have been feeling guilty about all this honestly (a fault of mine is being way too empathtic) I'm starting to wonder if I am being selfish? What if they do become homeless, then what do I do...just leave them out there? I don't expect Ashton to help them and with good reason, but how do I get rid of my guilt and not cave in.... | older brother is very succeusful and gives/spends a lot of money on me and our youngest siblings. Rest of family is upset and wants me to give them money. How do I get rid of the guilt? |
I (M/22) am marrying my fiance (F/21) in about a year. We are both students and, at the moment, do not expect to get a single dime of help from her parents towards anything at all. My lovely bride-to-be has given me the task of planning our honeymoon. She told me that I can tell her whatever I want about it, but all she really needs to know is what kind of clothes to bring (besides none at all). We've both lived in the midwest all of our lives and it would be really great if we could leave the area. I have a few ideas in mind, but am looking for deals and suggestions. Basically, we both agreed a long time ago that when we have a honeymoon, it should be somewhere where we have the opportunity to do things, but are not going to feel like we wasted the trip by staying in and having "All of the sex that has ever been had in the history of ever" (Like if we went to Paris and didn't see the tower, or Disney Land and never went to any of the parks). It needs to be a honeymoon, not a vacation, if that makes sense. We want something that has a great view. Neither of us like to swim (I hate public pools and oceans/lakes gross her out), but that doesn't rule out beaches. A hot tub would be nice. I would love the option for massages and not to run into small children all the time. Preferably not a cruise. The thought of a cabin in the mountains sounded good, but we are getting married in the winter, so it might be nice to be somewhere semi-warm. There is also the chance of mountain roads having a ton of snow, so it would need to be somewhat near civilization. We are open to driving there if plane tickets cost too much. Neither of us are too clear on how timeshares work, but we would like to avoid them unless we were having access to one that somebody owned. I understand that it could be a good idea to wait to have the honeymoon, but I've seen too many people do that and then never take their honeymoon. We would rather have a less expensive honeymoon immediately after the wedding and then save up for a second honeymoon later instead of run the risk of not having one at all. | Need a relatively inexpensive honeymoon with a fun, romantic atmosphere where I can focus on loving my baby daily, nightly and ever so rightly. Edit: As far as budget goes... I would like to have $4,000. I am hoping for $2,000. I am expecting $1,000. |
Every so often (maybe once or twice a month) my boyfriend and some close friends get together to drink, smoke, and just hang out. However, I am constantly paranoid about them getting in trouble, getting sick, or anything else. I really don't like being home with them when they drink (it's loud, unpleasant, and I am always worried that they might get sick everywhere--happened before). But I also don't like being away when they are drinking because I want to have someone responsible and sober there with them to make sure things are okay. We also have a dog, so it's a big hassle to spend the night elsewhere with him (no way I am leaving him alone when they are drinking). I know it's not unreasonable for him to have friends over and have fun, but I think they are too irresponsible and loud when they drink--my boyfriend disagrees and also points out how infrequently it happens. It always leads to a fight and both of us unhappy--I am still stressed out about the drinking, and then I interrupt their fun by being upset. How do I avoid arguments over this? Tips for not getting stressed out/ideas other than just spending the night with someone else? | Don't like being home with my boyfriend and friends when they drink, but don't trust them to be completely safe on their own, which leads to a lot of disagreement. What are some solutions? |
I kind of hate the universally accepted definitions of intelligence. I have several learning disabilities, and throughout my life I had been misdiagnosed, improperly advised, and prescribed medications I didn't need. I have been called borderline retarded by some doctors, and just short of a genius by others, despite the fact that I'm about as average as they come. I don't have any of the obvious tells of mental disability (ie, speech difficulties, physical deformities, or any particular disabilities that stand out), yet doctors that I've been to have had catastrophically different opinions. I got barely above-average grades in High School, got into a decent college, and have been doing pretty well (I'm a sophomore now). Despite this, though, I've had doctors tell me that I have severe ADHD, and needed to be on medication for life, that I have OCD to the point that it can interfere with everyday functions, that I have cognitive disabilities (facial recognition, impulse controls, short term memory.) Yet just last year, I went to a neurologist, for scan treatments, and was told I didn't actually have any of these things, just Mild Traumatic Brain Injury from a childhood accident (fell down metal stairs), and some of the symptoms were similar to that of ADHD. Despite all of these diagnoses, I have led a pretty average life, and don't feel that much of what the doctors have said has been true. Society's definitions and expectations for intelligence are, in my opinion, extremely skewered, with a lot of room for discrimination. Plenty of people have been written off as stupid or incompetent because society thinks you need to fit a certain mold to be brilliant, when in reality they were more intelligent than anyone could have imagined. | It may be a cliched message, but do not allow your perception of yourself or your mental ability to be determined by how society defines you. |
What you are missing is that this is a private company ( not affiliated with the Department of Education regardless of what they may have told you) that wants to charge you $500 to sign up for a federal repayment plan ([Pay As You Earn]( which you can access on your own for free. PAYE is basically just the "new and improved" version of IBR... caps monthly payments at 10% of discretionary income and forgives the balance after 20 years. | They are trying to scam you. There are many companies like this out there, preying upon recent college graduates who haven't done enough research on their own. If you want to consolidate and/or sign up for PAYE, do it yourself at |
An individual, normally out of college yet still living with his parents, who spends nearly all of his day on reddit. They feel intellectually superior to other people, and are atheist, yet they worship people like Richards Dawkins, Neil Tyson, Carl Sagan like gods. They are often in the STEM field, but aren't very good at it, so they fail. More often than not, they are libertarians, and love Ron Paul, again like a god. They like "geeky" and "non-mainstream media" such as firefly, star trek, buffy the vampire slayer, stargate, and other sci-fi series. Also anime sometimes. Bonus points if they wear a fedora because they think it makes them look classy and euphoric | A hipster who is non-spiritual instead of spiritual, still loves obscure music, has linux instead of apple, in STEM instead of Liberal Arts, aaannnddd is still a fucking loser. |
I was a mere 16 years old. When I wasn't in school I was training intensely in classical ballet so I didn't get to spend much time with friends. A guy in my general group of friends kept bugging me to "hang out," so one weekend I finally agreed, making the assumption that he meant hang out with the whole group . So I drove myself over to his house and rang the bell, but surprisingly he opened it, grabbed his coat, and headed out the door to his car. He told me we were going to our friend Ben's house, so I still had no reason to believe my assumption was incorrect. He drives me over to Ben's house and we mount the front steps, but instead of ringing the bell he pulls out a key. He opens the front door and lets me in. No one is there. It turned out that Ben was on vacation with his family and had given this kid the key to his house so he could take me there to be alone with me. My thoughts on the matter were, "What the fuck?" But being the 16-year-old girl that I was, I asked no questions. We just ended up watching a movie and he awkwardly held my sweaty sweaty hand. At the end of the night he took me back to my car and tried to get a smooch out of me, but I told him I couldn't do that and proceeded to get the fuck out of there. | An aquaintance unexpectedly took me to his friend's empty house to be alone with me on what, unbeknownst to me, was some freaky version of a high-school date. |
I just realized this a couple minutes ago when I was reading an askreddit asking parents what secrets their children thought they were keeping. When I first moved to Indiana I was in 4th grade and I had to stay with a friend of my mom's family. I don't know if they had extra hot water or what, but I would take some long ass showers. Anyway, I never really understood why the lady of the house always acted so disgusted why I was taking long showers. "I know what you're doing in there" she told me. I was pretty much like yeah the same thing you do in there duh! Anyway somebody in the aforementioned askreddit answered "my 12 year old all of a sudden started taking showers without me having to beg him, and they're frequent and extremely long... I know what he's doing". And that answer jogged my memory to that experience. | for a few months a lady I was staying with thought I was rubbing it out in her shower every day, called me out on it daily, and I never got the hint. Until now, thanks to reddit. |
My girlfriend of 1.5 years wants to move in together, since I have to find a new place by January. She has been living her parents for 3 years since she lost her last job and wants to move with me to Toronto since she wants to get back to her "old life" of living and working downtown. She also has some big debt to pay off. She hasn't really looked for work in her current city (Oshawa) as she said she doesn't have the means to commute. We have been looking for a place since September, but now i'm having some big reservations about our financial security in this scenario. She said she can pay $200 a month and pay for her food until she finds work but the places we're looking at would require me paying nearly 50% of my take home pay. I want to find a place that would fit my budget if i were living alone, just in case it takes her longer to find work that expected. We found a 500sq ft condo for $1200 which i'm pretty comfortable with, despite having to manage the smaller unit. But she doesn't think we'd be able to fit all our stuff, and would rather opt for a 630sq ft unit at $1570 (which, after her contribution, would still have me paying more than I would like). We've also been getting into a lot of fights. She has been getting very angry as of late and I have been pressuring her to find work and quit smoking, which she has promised to do, but it worries me that she might not. I brought up the concept of me moving into the smaller, cheaper unit first, and she can stay over whenever she likes, look for work and move in after when she's employed. This did not go over well with her. I love her, and we get along fine 90% of the time, but at this point I really need her to take charge, find work and take care of her health if we have a future together. Am i wrong to make the suggestion of a phased move-in? She suffers from depression and anxiety, so i'm concerned a decision like this will set her back Maybe if we move, she'll make the best of it and find that career she needs. She say she wants to, but i sometimes wonder. But if we move in, and we're fighting and i'm paying most of the rent, we'll be miserable. | gf with no job and wants to move in with me. Concerned money will become an issue if she doesn't find work, especially if we rent a larger, more expensive place. |
Landlords are required to provide certain things for the building but as far as security is concerned it's probably only locks on the door. Running a business in a high crime area is risky for this reason. Renting out a business space in these areas is difficult because people don't want to stay around. Your friend can ask the owner to look into providing security service for all tenants given the crime but I doubt he's go through with it. Once he does start providing security, even with the tenets paying the cost he is then responsible for the actions of those guards. Additionally liquor stores are notorious targets and so your friend is probably getting more attention than anyone else. The other tenants are unlikely to want to share this expense as they are not as high profile targets. | banks, liquor stores, jewelry stores often have to provide security services. This is a cost of business that will likely not be passed on to the landlord. |
The same thing Dan Savage, sex columnist, said to a teenager: You're having a hard time getting girls. That sucks. I remember what it was like when I was a young teenager and wanted boys and couldn't get any. It sucked. But the sad fact is that most young teenage boys are repulsive—that is, they are half-formed works in progress. Girls mature physically more quickly than boys, which means most girls your age already look like young women and they're generally attracted to (slightly) older boys—and there you are, aching for your first girlfriend, but still looking like a short, hairless chimp. But don't despair. Your awkward/repulsive stage will pass. In the meantime, here's what you need to do: Worry less about getting your young teenage self laid and start thinking about getting your 18- or 20-year-old self laid. Join a gym and get yourself a body that girls will find irresistible, read—read books—so that you'll have something to say to girls (the best way to make girls think you're interesting is to actually be interesting), and get out of the house and do shit—political shit, sporty shit, arty shit—so that you'll meet different kinds of girls in different kinds of settings and become comfortable talking with them. Some more orders: Get a decent haircut and use deodorant and floss your teeth and take regular showers and wear clean clothes. Go online and read about birth control and STIs, and learn enough about female anatomy that you'll be able to find a clitoris in the dark. Masturbate in moderation—no more than 10 times a day—and vary your masturbatory routine. I can't emphasize this last point enough. A vagina does not feel like a clenched fist, nor does a mouth, an anus, titty fucking, dry humping, or e-stim. If you don't want to be sending me another pathetic letter in five years complaining about your inability to come unless you're beating your own meat, you will vary your routine now so that you'll be able to respond to different kinds of sexual stimulation once you do start getting the girls. Good luck, kiddo. (The above advice was for a straight teenage boy. Gay teenage boys should read "boys" where I said "girls," "anus" where I said "vagina," "prostate" where I said "clitoris," and "fist" where I said "fist.") | Don't try to get girls when you are a teenager, workout, develop your mind, and learn about good sex so you can be a good catch when you are 18+ |
I should mention that I live with my boyfriend's family and I love and care about them very much, which is why I'm so concerned. My boyfriend's father is big on doing his own renovations and manual labor, but he often asks me and my boyfriend for help doing things which are outright unsafe. For example, heavy lifting with not enough people, installing gyp-rock on high ceilings using rickety ladders, wheeled scaffolding on 2x4's over stairwell, etc... (think /r/osha) Anyway, me and my boyfriend hate to say no, especially to my boyfriend's father since if we don't help he'll probably find an even more dangerous "solution". In fact, I can't think of a single time when either me of my boyfriend has said no, no matter how dangerous the situation. The other day though, I injured my shoulder during one of these escapades, and it's not the first time. I'm just worried about everyone's safety in general. Is it wrong for me to say no in these situations? And my boyfriend too? I also want to clarify, I have absolutely no issue helping out so long as the situation is safe. I do, however, have a lot of trouble saying "no" when I'm asked to do something I'm not comfortable with. And anytime I bring up the safety issue, I just get a "Don't worry, it's fine!" | My boyfriend's father has very little sense of safety and often asks my and my boyfriend to do things which are unsafe. Injuries have occurred in the past, and I don't want any more. |
Ever since the school year started (September) we got really busy, and she's always too tired to have sex. I get discouraged and now I'm used to just not thinking about it or trying for sex after being refused so many times. We have lived together for almost a year, and we used to have sex often. Almost too much at one point. Then it died down, and now we never do it. She says she thinks of it as something she "has" to do, when we do do it, and she always thinks of all the other stuff she needs to do. She's also discouraged because when we do have sex it hurts. We are both really busy university students. But I don't feel this tiredness that she does. I feel like an important part of the relationship is missing, making it feel more like we're just friends. I've talked to her a few times about this, asking why we don't do it anymore, and that I feel frustrated. The conversation basically has ended at the point that she's just too tired -- what can you do? Make someone have sex when they don't want to? I don't want to break up, because I feel like we will eventually get our sex back once we're less busy (no idea when though). But this is kind of tearing me up inside, I don't feel as connected to her as when we did have sex. I know people on the internet would be like "wow over 2 weeks without sex, break up," but then I'd feel like I broke up over sex, which seems stupid because I love her. | My GF and I live together and used to have a lot of sex. Now it's just once a month, and we feel really distant. I've talked to her about it, but how do I deal with this when it's only me who sees the problem? |
Ok, I'm also a Canadian, but this is basically how I understand it: In any century -- 17th or 21st -- the government has a tendancy to impinge on the freedoms of the public. Some day that lack of freedom will become intolerable, and when it does, there's a good chance that the peaceful avenues of reform will be unavailable. Violent revolution is how the United States was founded, so presumably the authors of the constitution were none too squeamish that it might come to that again someday. The theory goes that if people are allowed to have guns, governments will be less likely to move towards all-our totalitarian dystopia. You know that Nineteen Eighty-Four George Orwell horror we all wante to avoid? The proles could have changed thigns around pretty quick for themselves with a tiny bit of organizing if they'd all been allowed to have guns. Supporters of the Second Ammendment tend to see gun violence as a matter of personal responsibility (punish the criminal, but don't take away the larger freedom.) Also, if they're being particularly honest, they might call firearm homicide an unfortunate collateral damage to be weighed against the greater evil of tyranny. On that count, I would say the Second Ammendment is a good litmus test. When they take away all the guns, there's a good chance all the other freedoms are going to be taken away next. (One caveat: I don't necessarily believe all of this, although I understand where the right wingers are coming from. You asked for someone to articulate it, not for a personal opinion.) | The right to guns creates an implied threat of violence that stops governments from taking away all the other rights. For any government legitimately interested in totalitarian authority, this will be a serious concern. |
My Grandad got a cell phone a few weeks ago and i was round visiting him and he says that he is having difficulty calling his friend. He has a nokia 3310 just because he will only ever use it for phoning. Anyway, this is how the conversation went: Him: "I think my phone is broke, i keep trying to phone Herp but i dont think it is dialing or anything." So i take the phone and phone my cell and it works fine so i ask him to show me exactly how he tried to phone Herp. Him: "Well i hit that middle button(menu) and then hit 'send message', then i hit 'Create new message' and then this screen appears with this black border, i dont know what that does so i just hit that middle button again and then choose Herp from the list. Then some screen with a bar on it appears and then a tick, but when i put it to my ear i dont hear a dial tone or anything." | Grandad tried to Phone his friends by selecting "Create new message" and then selecting his friends number. He said he has tried this several dozen times over the space of 3 or 4 days. |
Me and my friend both go to the same highschool and thrir are these two kids who think that they are hardcore gangsters or something because they recently "robbed" my friend 200 dollars and told everyone that they also stole his shoes (wtf?). I was thinking of putting sugar in his gas tank or something of that nature. Ps one of the kids moms is a cop. | assholes stole from my friend i want revenge. What is the best way of giving them what they deserve? And i dont plan on going to jail so keep it semi legal. |
My weirdest dream is my most vivid dream. My mom and I were at this video game store/arcade place thing. Like, they sold video games but they also had those big arcade games like Mario and House of the Dead. In the back corner, there was this long hallway, which I assumed was for employees, but I wandered down it anyways. There's a door at the very end and one on the right wall. The wall door opens, and a man in a black suit and sunglasses and a yellow rhino in another black suit exit. They walk straight up to me, pick me up, and say "Game over." Then my vision goes black and the words "GAME OVER" blare in red. Suddenly, I'm back in the store as if I was starting off from a save point. Everything is the same as before, so I wander down the hallway again. This time, the very back door of the hall opens and a (sexy) lady in a (sexy) black, skintight jumpsuit saunters out with a machine gun. I hide myself behind one of the arcade games, and this woman walks into the main room like she owns the place and shoots at everyone, the kids, the parents, the employees, everyone. While she's shooting everyone else, I grab my mom and take her outside. We hop in some random car and start driving away. We're heading back to our house, but I look behind us and I see sexy lady, as well as the man in the suit and the yellow rhino following our car on foot. Suddenly, my mom stops the car and we both hop out. On the median between the two sides of the road, a black bear is fighting our black furred puppy and a grizzly bear is fighting our brown furred puppy. I have no idea how they survived, but we scooped them up, got in the car and continued to our house again. We arrive at our house safe and sound. Open the front door. The two bears, sexy lady, the man, and the rhino are standing there. In unison, they say "Game over." My vision goes black and the words "GAME OVER" blare in red. One other strange one was me going to the grocery store, getting locked in a closet, and discovering a gigantic eyeball, which stared at me for eternity. | Goth version of Zero Suit Samus, Neo, Clam, and possibly my puppies long lost mothers chased me and my mom down to inform me that it was indeed "game over". |
Well you can tell by the title what I did but I'll tell you my story anyway. So back in November, I discovered Uber and to say the least it changed my fucking life. Before I was waking up 6 am like a peasant to catch a bus that unfortunately drives straight through the ghetto and obviously wasn't the safest thing at night going home. I had to do this everyday at least that was until I discovered uber. I could finally sleep until 7 am like a Saudi Prince and still make it to school on time by 8:15. This was great until I realized that, despite how cheap Uber is, its still way more expensive than the bus. I had to find a way to get my Uber rides without spending another dime. Thankfully, Uber had a referral policy that allowed me to share my code with friends in exchange free rides. But sooner or later this wasnt enough to support my opulent two uber/day lifestyle. So taking some inspiration from this [gentleman]( I decided to go bukkake my promo code on every coupon website on the internet. And for awhile I was rolling in free rides. To point where I didn't know what to do with them anymore as I had moe than enough to support my two ride-a-day habit. I began using uber for the stupidest things ever. Hey do you want me to go pick up that pizza you just ordered? No problem lemme just get an Uber. Do you have a craving for Japanese style bubble tea at 1 am but don't have a car? No problem lemme just get an Uber. I was looking for excuses to use my free rides. I felt like a fucking king. Until one faithful morning ride in February ended my Uber career. I took my Uber to school and there was a surge but because I had $30 credits I figured no problemo, worst case scenario I pay $2-3. But the app only applied a $20 instead of a $30. So, I wounded up paying $9. Pissed off, I promptly contacted Uber support 3 times because I wasn't getting a reply in a timely fashion being the Saudi prince that I was. Eventually I did get a reply and the first customer support lady was totally cool and refunded me the $9. But it was the second lady who fucking snitched on me to one of her superiors, who after flagging my account, took away all 95 free rides I had left. The worst part was I couldn't get mad. I knew I was in the wrong and I pretty much scammed the company out of $3-4k in all the rides I used. In the end I earned about 255 free rides and used 160 of them. The only part that I hate is having to wake up and take the bus again. | I scammed uber out of 255 free rides worth about $6k. Then in order went from rags to riches to snitches & back to rags. |
My girlfriend doesn't use reddit so unfortunately I have to post this second hand. My girlfriends freaking out right now though because she doesn't know how to handle this situation and what her rights are and you guys are smart people so I figured you'd be able to help in navigating these waters. Here's what's going on: My girlfriend lives in an upper floor duplex. Her "landlord" lives below her but the real person running the show seems to be his mother. (Sherry) She's a constant presence even though her name's not on the lease. That presence can get to feel a bit invasive. One time I was waiting at the side door for my girlfriend to come out and kept noticing the blinds in the downstairs windows shifting strangely. Sure enough I start hearing murmurs and then a loud "Why is there a man on the side of the house?! Why are you out there?" at which point I tell her I'm waiting for someone that lives inside and then the blinds close and nothing else is heard. Most recently my girlfriend awoke to loud construction (that she wasn't notified about). It turned out to be the sound of someone installing a bunch of cameras. Now there's a camera on in the hallway outside there door. This is a hallway that ins completely enclosed and locked. And there are already plenty of camera's outside of the building. This feels like blatant creepy spying. Is doing something like that normal? This brings me to the reason I'm making this post. My girlfriend's roommate recently recieved these texts from Sherry (transcribed from a screenshot I've been sent): "Hi Grace. ..its sherry......we have been noticing guys regularly spending the night.....coming, going, ect.. . i also noticed men's clothes in the washer yesterday. Your lease has a clause about overnight guests/others living there. The apartment and rent was based on two occupants......who filed out applications. If additional occupants are living there, we will need to renegotiate the lease and rent. The electric bill in your apartment was excessive last month for just two people living there. Also the keys are not to be copied and given out. We will need to set up a time to discuss." To be clear, it's in the lease that the landlord will be paying for the electricity, so that's why they know what the bill is. The roommate's boyfriend does spend the night but he doesn't live there and he's never there alone/doesn't have a key. I rarely stay over there. Also my girlfriend and her roommate are both pretty quiet girls that don't have parties or anything. My girlfriend is at work right now so she can't check the exact language of the clause Sherry mentioned and I know that might make hard to give specific advice without that. But any advice/perspective at all would be much appreciated. Thanks! Edit: Also, this is in MI, if that makes any difference legally | The domineering mother of my girlfriend's landlord is acting in a way that feels like an invasion of privacy and wants to renegotiate the lease due to "overnight guests" |
My girlfriend and I were going through a rough patch after her ex boyfriend died in a car accident. The accident happened the day after we got in argument and I wished that her ex-boyfriend was out of the picture for good. I got my wish I guess but I would have taken it back still to this day. His death really strained the relationship for us. We hit the breaking point one night when I was blackout drunk and was getting annoyed by little things. I drunkenly said "fine you're single!" as I walked away she threw a bottle me and it missed but I realized I fucked up big time. After I realized I hurt her so much I walked into traffic hoping to end it that night. She saw me and ran over to pull me out of the road then punched me in the face. Breaking my front teeth. We officially broke up in the morning. I spent 7 months extremely depressed and started hooking up with random girls hoping to forget. Instead I'd wake up crying next to my hooks up because I realized I wasn't happy with the direction of my life. I was miserable and exhausted. I had to get professional help. After a long break we eventually did get back together and we have been happily together since then. Some times we ignore the first year we were together and act like it never happened because we were such different people. | Broke up after her ex boyfriend died. Tried to kill myself. Ended up getting punched in the face. Depression. Tons of emotionless sex with randos. Got back together. Happy now. Lack of communication was the problem. |
Here's some background info: Firstly, my handicap is sort of new. A year and a half ago, I almost lost my leg in a motorcycle accident. It was saved, but it's not a pretty sight, and I walk oddly. Can't run, jump, kneel, squat, etc. Secondly, when it happened, I was in a relationship that I thought was very serious. But the jerk cheated on me while I was in the hospital, I forgave him, we tried an open relationship and it was just downhill from there... I dumped his ass eight months ago. Haven't been on a date or even a one night stand since. To make things worse... before that guy, I was married. So, basically, in the last decade I have been single for about two years total. I am not sure I even remember HOW to date. I'm actually a little intimidated by the idea. But I'm young (<30), and I want to be somebody's girlfriend again gorrammit, I'm good at it. So, I got the ladyballs to get on OKC and Match.com, and after many creepy messages from men that typed like they were thirteen, I have two dates this week and two other men that WANT to take me out. I'm actually very excited about the first two, but there's one thing I need advice on: how do I tell them about my phsyical disability? My current plan is simply to show up to the date without my cane, and explain during the course of the evening. I am hesitant to mention it beforehand, because without being able to see me... well, the words 'disability' or 'handicap' tend to make people imagine the worst without visual context. I understand, though, that this is something most people probably want to know about beforehand. I just don't want to be judged solely on my disability. I already have a hard time meeting guys because I'm quiet, nerdy, and not skinny. Am I wrong to handle the issue this way? How would you handle it? | I walk funny because I'm handicapped and don't know if I should tell my date before we actually go on the date. W.W.R.D. (What would Reddit Do) ?? |
I'm 25 years old, I work quality assurance at a cellphone wholesaling company in New York City and for the passed 8 months I've been living in a 4 bedroom apartment, with 5 of the shittiest people I've ever known. And I can't fucking take it anymore. These people are all around the same age as I am, but not a single one of them wants to buck up and act like an adult. I'm talking guys who go out every night getting ridiculously drunk and waking the entire house up. Guys who refuse to wash a single dish, take out any trash, have no problem eating my food and using my toiletries. And today at 6am as I'm leaving for a job that doesn't pay enough, but some how pays more than any of their jobs I get asked by 2 drunk roommates to help confront another for RENT. Rent that we'd apparently not paid in 3 WEEKS. Usually I'd give the landlord my share of the money on rent day, but she repeatedly asked me to give her all of the rent at once because she doesn't like waiting around just my cut. So I finally caved in, and go against my better judgment in trusting one of my roommates with my money. And one of my roommates has just been AWOL since it was due, and instead of giving the landlord what we have, instead of saying ANYTHING we are now late. Aside from my cut we've been late every fucking month I've lived here. Now in order to not get kicked out of our apartment, I have to put up the majority of the fucking money in the hope that I'll get my money back. Thing is I don't make that much money. After taxes I'm taking home at most $850 every two weeks. That ain't shit in New York. So as much as I'd like to move out and find a place for myself, I can't find one that I can afford outside of the Housing Authority lotteries, but applying isn't guaranteed. So I don't know, I don't know if I want help or advice or just to be talked out of killing my roommates, but just I can't deal with living with fucking man-children anymore. | I live with adult children/I have to pay one of their rent this month/ while dealing with a never ending cycle of being late with rent. And I don't know what to do anymore. |
So I'm overseas on a study exchange now. I was with my gf for about 2.5 months before I flew thousands of miles away. Initially, things started out fine. I guess due to the fact that it was still the honeymoon period during the first few months of the year. Up until a month or so ago, I started feeling like my interactions with her felt more of a chore than something I look forward to. She's incredibly insecure about herself (not me), pretty high-maintenance emotionally, and always seems to wanna talk to me during whatever free time I have, which doesn't give me much time to myself or my other friends. Part of the problem is she doesn't have that many friends or hobbies to speak of. I have tried encouraging her but it doesn't seem to be working. She also seems to think the world of me, which I realize I should feel lucky for, but somehow I'm not happy. I feel guilty. I'm not miserable, but I'm not where I'd like to be. One of the days, she asked me if she could Skype me but it felt more of a burden to me I'm not gonna lie, ending it has been on my mind. I have talked to her about it, but things don't seem to be improving on my end. The only thing stopping me is that she'll be coming over to travel with me in a month's time for a bout 2.5 weeks. Subsequently, I'll be traveling for another 3 weeks and will head back home thereafter. I definitely do not want to break up with her before she comes over as she has already bought her plane ticket and our travel itinerary has all been paid for and confirmed. What's troubling me is, should I mention anything when she comes over? or break up with her soon after going home? Or if anyone has anymore ideas or suggestions, feel free to speak your mind. I'm all for working things out, but for how long should we keep working at it? MORE INFO: She just graduated but I still a year of study left. | 7 months together, 5 months ldr, I've lost feelings. Agreed to workout our differences but it's not helping me. How/When should I break up with her, if at all. |
You can convince the hag that he's right for her, having only met them both just recently you may even believe they can make a good couple, but ultimately the Half-Elf is driven to a maddening depression with the terrible match. Every time you travel past that area her complexion has worsened, her mood darkened until eventually she either kills Steeljaw, or commits suicide. There is however a third person, a man not abusive enough to want her dead if he can't have her, an ex-guardsman who lives nearby. He offers no rewards, just the simple truth he would love her to the end of his days. This would require you convincing both the Half-Elf and Steeljaw not to kill each other, and begin a courting quest-line where you act as matchmaker to the woodsman and the Wood-Elf. You get no great immediate rewards for this option, save perhaps a small trinket from Steeljaw when you convince him not to have an innocent woman killed. You do however see their blossoming relationship become a solid foundation of happiness, both of them profusely thanking you and offering you various small things every time you visit. Their house slowly becomes prettier, happier, both of them go about their lives with renewed vigour. Until eventually you meet their newborn baby, who they have named after you! | don't convince woman to join a man crazy enough to kill her if he can't have her. Tell Steeljaw to grow up. Find a better match for her. Get no big rewards other than the pride of a job well done (and massive xp) |
This is a bit of a strange issue, but here goes. Our relationship is a little over 2.5 years. We have had plenty of sex and discuss it often between us. I find sex to be very personal and am somewhat reserved about it. I have a relatively high sex drive, but only in the bedroom. Outside of that, I really do not like talking about sex, discussing sex, joking about it, comparing it, etc., etc. On the opposite side of the spectrum, she doesn't really find sex all that important or taboo. Her sex drive is a little low, yet she doesn't mind talking about it with friends, joking and just relating with others. The sex drive isn't really an issue -- we have found a good balance for us. It's the latter aspect, which is how open we are to discuss it with others, that bothers me. We have a group of mutual friends that we hang out with often, and the members are all pretty open about sex, including my girlfriend, and they will joke and compare, but not me. It just makes me uncomfortable and I often get quiet or try to change the subject. I think part of the issue is that I feel inadequate, almost like I'm still a virgin, because she's the only partner I've ever had. She has slightly more experience, by which I mean only 1 prior boyfriend. To be quite honest, I get severe anxiety just /thinking/ about her being with any guy, at any point in time ever, other than me. (Which I shouldn't, because she has hardly done anything; that relationship was short and abusive, she has almost PTSD-like symptoms thinking about it, and says it means nothing to her and she regrets it. The majority of her experiences, and 100% of the positive experiences, have been with me.) I still feel below her in "rank", like I should have more experience and stories than her as well as my friends. I feel inadequate, inexperienced and weak. It's an insecurity thing I need to get over because it's putting a bit of a strain between my girlfriend and I, and to a lesser extent, our friends. What can I do? | I'm a bit insecure -- discussing sex, sexual experiences or joking about sex outside of the bedroom gives me anxiety and makes me very uncomfortable. Puts a bit of strain on my relationship and group of friends. I want to feel more comfortable doing so. |
I'm not really looking for a relationship - if I was, I could just ask her out. I'm dealing with problems in my life right now. I'm not going to confess when I don't know where I'm going; she could do better, and I don't have to be in a relationship (I'm sure I won't regret it later) I know everyone is different and this is all guesswork, but I wanted some advice: We met at the beginning of this summer and we talked a lot. I like talking about philosophy, and she does too, so great (most of our friends aren't really interested in that stuff). A few months later she tells me about how she told her best friend about me, and some of the philosophy they discussed. I'd never talk about girls with my friends, but I assume I came up because of some related idea we talked about before Later she mentions that she told her mom about me. Again, the idea is foreign to me; I wouldn't tell my mom about a friend of the opposite gender, but that's just me :P I don't think much of it, assuming it's something about some idea we discussed before Recently she told me she did great on a school essay, and that she wrote about me. I think it has to do with some idea we've talked about again, but shortly after I wonder if there's more to it, and now I'm here. She said it's embarrassing and not to ask, so I don't (and I'm not going to ask someone else to figure out what it was about) Is it relatively normal for girls to do this? I know nothing about girls | She talked about me with her childhood friend, mom, and wrote about me in a school essay. How likely is this a hint? Thanks for your time! |
I'm currently a US expat [23M] working abroad, I've recently began a relationship with an expat of another country. She's 24 and will be finishing her studies in two months before she returns to her home country. It seems as if her staying here isn't really an option, her parents want her back and she said herself that she needs to begin finding a job. However, she said there's a small chance that she may continue to study for a masters degree in our adopted country. However, I feel as if she doesn't really want that and I don't want her to stay here just because of me, since I'm also only here temporarily and cannot guarantee that I will be here more than 12 months. So if she were to stay here, I'd feel quite guilty and under pressure to remain here. Yet, on the other hand, there's also no possibility of me moving to her country, as I am unable to speak the native language over there, which would prevent me from having a job most likely. With that said, I know I'm relatively young, but I can honestly say this has been one of the best relationships I've ever had (funny how it works, considering we both have to communicate in the language of our country of residence). Things are good, she spends about 3-4 nights in my apartment every week and we have the same circle of friends. Now what should I do? Realistically this is going to end. I am pretty sure I am simply playing with fire and will eventually get burnt by this. Should I continue to go on and make the best of it until the day she leaves or do I begin taking some preventive measures? Should we part ways knowing that it wasn't us, but timing and other circumstances that ended us? Like I said, I'm not sure what to do here, so any and all advice would be greatly appreciated. I'm relatively inexperienced in these matters, have only had 2 serious girlfriends prior. | young U.S. expat abroad in a relationship with an expat of another country, who is moving back to her homeland. Feel like I'm "Slow dancing in a burning room" FYI. I've posted this on a throwaway. |
I've recently noticed a few things about my boyfriend that make him seem a bit selfish and manipulative to me. I want to make sure it isn't me overreacting or making a bigger deal out of something than it actually is though. He doesn't like any of my friends and urges me not to hang out with most of them. He keeps telling me to send one of them (who he got into a huge fight with about 2 years ago and absolutely hates) a message explaining why I don't want to be friends with them anymore. Yet, a few acquaintances of mine he likes, he does urge me to hang out with. I don't know if this is him looking out for me or him just not wanting me to be around people he doesn't approve of. A lot of our plans have to be what he wants to do and he doesn't seem to care about what I'd like to do. There is always an excuse as to why we shouldn't do something I want to do, but he doesn't. He took me to a restaurant once where I got very sick and threw up in the bathroom for a good 30 minutes (I have stomach issues), which was fine because neither of us knew I would have that reaction, but he blamed it on my mindset and what I ordered, then urged me to go back with him. Every time I bring up something he does that I don't appreciate in as calm and respectful of a manner as possible, he brings up something I did in the past that bothered him, how he doesn't think he can get past it, and basically tries to turn it around to make me feel guilty. Sometimes he even outright denies doing something he clearly did and knows he did too. He constantly belittles me in front of his friends by insulting my intelligence, driving, decision making skills, etc. He's called me stupid in front of his friends many times and tells them I overreact to everything. He also has me drive him everywhere since he hates driving, but insults my car and my driving. In the course of a year and a half, I've paid for probably all but 4 of my meals, which would be fine if I also didn't drive us everywhere and pay for the appetizer and dessert he wants and go to the more pricey restaurants he wants to go to, but can't afford. He has been asking me to cut my hair a lot recently and even asked me what I would do if I woke up with short hair, which concerned me. I think now that I've assessed everything over in my head, it seems like I need to stand my ground a lot more. However, being told I overreact all the time has made me question whether or not I actually do. | My boyfriend makes fun of me, tries to control who I'm friends with, wants everything his way, and I think he's manipulative, but am also worried I'm overreacting. |
I understand that, in most cases, people have very complicated, very personal reasons for wanting to end their life. I would not condemn them for making that decision. I think people should be free to make it. I think that the act itself, in a technical way, is often selfish. If other people want you to live, and you want to die, then by killing yourself, you are acting on your desires, not those of your loved ones. That is, I think, the definition of selfish. Which is not to say that it is wrong. What I really want to say, though, is that I think the way in which people commit suicide can be very selfish. If you blow your head off in your dining room, leaving your loved ones to find your body, then you are selfish. You were probably not emotionally well, and I accept that. However, that is a serious prick move. Why would you inflict that kind of trauma on your loved ones? If you don't discuss the issue which your loved ones, or don't even let them know why you made your decision, then I think that is also selfish. You have likely just condemned them to a lifetime of regret and uncertainty. | I think the reason that people tend to see suicide as selfish is because it seems that most people who commit suicide have very little respect for the emotional well-being of those that they leave behind. |
Here's my copy pasta]( of a revenge story. My best revenge stories involve my asshole dad on the other hand. I never got more satisfaction and been treated more fairly then when I fucked with him. I'll give you two examples. The first involved my dad throwing away my cigarettes. He didn't like me smoking, even though he did the same thing when he was younger than me and did it for far longer than me. So did he sit me down to discuss it? Nope. I used to buy my cigarettes in bulk at the duty free between the US and Canadian border since they were 1/3 of the price per pack. So one day I come home and find 2 cartons of cigarettes ripped in half and in the toilet. I was pissed, but shrugged it off. My parents leave to go to some friends house and the fridge is absolutely filled with alcohol. We're talking 36 (give or take) bottles of Heineken and two big ass bottles of whiskey. I end up getting shitfaced and drain the rest in the sink. My dad was not happy going without alcohol for the rest of the week while seeing all those empty bottles. But he never fucked with my smoking again, instead he tried to have civil conversations with me about it. The second example involves me spending too much time on WoW (since we recently moved, WoW being just released and all my friends playing it, it was the only way I could stay in touch with them). So he gives me this whole long speech about going out and making friends with people at church and needing to get a girlfriend (after being chastised my entire life for looking at naked women in magazines or on the internet). He cuts the cable to my room, so no internet or TV. I cut the cable to the house 2 hours later so he knows how it feels. I guess that's when he realized an eye for an eye wasn't worth the trouble and started leaving me alone. | Screwed over a chick at a nightclub I worked at. Fucked over my dad in relatively the same way he would fuck me over so he knew how it felt. Turns out he learned his lesson pretty quick. |
At my first dance in 4th grade at summer camp, one of my counselors pulled me aside after dancing with a girl and told me to place my hands on her butt. Being young I accepted this through 2 more years of camp and up until my first middle school dance (7th grade). I finally worked up the courage to ask a cute girl to dance and promptly put my hands on her butt with everyone watching from the sidelines. My/her friends were all freaking out the entire dance. Best part is I didn't find out it was "wrong" until after the dance when my friends told me. She never said a word. | 4th grade camp counselor taught me to slow dance with my hands on girl's butts. Didn't find out it was wrong until middle school in front of an audience. |
You're negative right now because people don't read reddiquette, but I agree with the basis behind the post (and I'm surprised redditors don't see it). The idea behind the OP is that people are voting republicans in again, because they're pissed that democrats didn't clean up the republican's mess in a couple of years. The reason stealth doesn't have a retirement plan, etc. is because of democratic voters, not the goddamn party (although they have some explaining to do as well). | You get disillusioned. Surprise surprise, you don't get anything the retards don't want you to have. Signed, California voter that voted 3rd party but would've voted Obama if Cali wasn't going straight to the Dem vote bank. |
I've warned my girlfriend many times before that I'm quite an asshole, and she's never believed me. I've told her many times that the person I've been is a lot different than the person she's currently with. She's been looking for Schindler's List for awhile now, then I saw it the other day and bought it for her. She said we should watch it together, but I told her it was probably a bad idea because I'd just piss her off with my jokes. I'm not malicious, but I joke about offensive topics: 9/11, the Holocaust, people committing suicide, whatever. I used to say shit like this just to get a reaction out of people. But now, I've come to the conclusion that nothing really matters, and, as such, I just find everything to be fair game for jokes. I find these events interesting, but not emotionally disturbing to me. There are some jokes that I won't make because I find them distasteful, but I feel like there shouldn't be any sort of line drawn for jokes. Maybe someone will kick the shit out of you for it, but then that's your fault for choosing the wrong audience. Like, okay, you make the joke, and people get offended. Oh, no. You're offended. Steve Hughes style. If someone dies, and they're not friends or family, I really don't care about them. I don't feel very bothered at all when I hear about a mass murder or anything. I don't think "oh, that's so sick of someone to do that" I just think "oh, interesting, that happened" and go on with my day. I've really cut down on making these sorts of jokes, and I never make them when I'm around her because I understand that would be embarrassing, but should I apologize because of the way I think? | I laugh and make jokes about lots of offensive things. I don't make the jokes in front of my girlfriend. She's pretty offended by my mentality. Do I apologize for my mindset? Or what am I supposed to do. |
Original Post]( So I talked with my girlfriend this weekend about some of the stuff that was on my mind. It was difficult to start because I was trying to choose my words carefully. I think the thing that surprised me the most was that she didn't seem to realize that I felt the way I did. She has always told me that she is always willing to meet me halfway in terms of intimacy within reason. I told her that I was also meeting her halfway as well by not pushing for things that I know she is uncomfortable with. This really seemed to surprise her and make her feel bad. It wasn't my intent to make her feel bad, just inform her of how I was feeling. She seemed genuinely hurt and sorry that she wasn't giving me what I needed We discussed the issue with birth control. She told me she has been in regular contact with her doctor and her gyn. Both are still advising her that certain BC can react negatively with the Ativan that she takes occasionally. They also told her that losing weight can (in addition to benefiting her overall health) reduce the likelihood of potential interactions between BC and Ativan, so she told me she's been hitting the gym harder. We discussed why she isn't ready and she became extremely emotional. She told me that she needs stability. I asked her what she feels stability is, if it's moving in together, if it's getting engaged, if it's getting married. She said that stability to her means knowing that she's the only girl I want to be with and I'm the only guy she wants to be with. She told me she wants to break the cycle, she doesn't want to potentially create the same situation that she had to live with as a child where her parents didn't wait until they were prepared to have a child before having sex. We left it that we didn't communicate about this issue enough and that we needed to keep the lines of communication open about it. | Discussed issues with girlfriend, girlfriend is still not ready for sex. Seemed genuinely surprised at how I was feeling. She is still researching BC. Needs stability before we have sex. Keeping the lines of communication open. |
We're both 19F, and were together for a year and a couple months. She broke up with me almost 4 months ago now. It was a really rough breakup for me, and I had sort of a downward spiral for a bit afterwards. I stopped eating regularly, I stopped going to class, I was self-harming, and I didn't really have anyone that I felt comfortable reaching out to about it. She was my best friend even before we started dating, and losing her was very hard. She, on the other hand, got a new partner like 2-3 weeks later (finding out about it was not a fun time for me). I'm still hurting over the breakup, but I spend more time with friends now and that helps me not feel so alone. Over the past few weeks we've spoken a few times over video chat. It started because I reached out to her, because I thought it would be good for me to tell her how I feel, and that it might help me find some kind of closure (which it hasn't really). We've video chatted 4 or 5 times maybe, always for a couple of hours at a time. It's been so nice just catching up with her, I miss her so much. We've talked about our feelings and stuff a few times, but sometimes we just talk and it's really nice to have someone that I feel so comfortable with back in my life. But I can already feel myself slipping into old habits, like wanting to call her pet names and such. It feels like nothing has changed. She says that she misses me and wants to be friends again, but I'm still as in love with her as I've ever been. When I have some time alone to think about it, I sometimes think that I should just cut contact with her, because talking the way we have been just reinforces my feelings for her. We talked last night and it was my intention to tell her that, but I didn't. We just stayed up late chatting instead, and pushed "the talk" back for another day. I feel like no contact might be best for me in the long run, but I don't want that, and that's why I can't bring myself to cut the cord. | Ex of 4 months wants to be friends again. I miss her a lot but I'm still in love with her and I don't know if being friends will hurt more or less in the long run. |
Cop feared for his life in physical altercation when trying to arrest a black youth who had robbed convenience store. Cop shot black youth and killed him. A grand jury didn't find the cop guilty, since that's a cop's job and they are allowed to use deadly force when they are in fear of their safety. | Town of mob rule black people don't like the pesky 'innocent till proven guilty' amendment of the US Constitution, and went crazy, being violent, robbing, looting and burning. |
I've said it before, so I'll say it again. It was a few years ago, one evening, after finishing my classes I was heading home. While waiting at the bus station, this nicely dressed man with blonde curly hair came to me and asked me a strange question: Stranger: "Hello, do you like beer?" In my confusion, I mumbled a "y..es? why?" then the weirdness ensued: Stranger: "I'm going to die soon, will you please come and have a beer with me?" At this point he was visibly nervous and kept asking the same question, then asked that maybe I would like wine instead of beer, and was getting more and more nervous and I literally froze in panic. I wasn't really scared, as there were lots of people around me. I was feeling both sad for the guy if it was true, and terrified too in case he was some rapist who wanted to lure girls who felt bad for him. I kept mumbling "No, sorry... I'm sorry, I can't... n...no...". What still haunts me is that before he gave up, he said a few times: Stranger: "I'm dying soon, please come with me. Come with me, I'm dying" He noticed I was visibly scared, turned around and just walked away. He was not a homeless man, he was holding a suitcase and was dressed in a long black trenchcoat. He walked away and disappeared into the crowd and I will never know if he was a poor guy who had just been told that he was really sick, an insane man, or just some psycho who wanted to lure girls. | Apparently nice guy came to me and asked me to have a beer with him because he was dying soon then disappeared into the crowd when he saw I wasn't reacting anymore due to panic and confusion. |
Sorry for the obvious throwaway, but I'll try to keep it short. I hope to get some advice from y'all! My SO (M22) and I (F21) have been together for eight years now. Four years of that were long distance (different colleges, study abroad, the whole rigmarole). Never taken a break, nor had a fight. We're both still pretty stupidly in love. We're both happy. Now I guess partially because we've been together for the equivalent of eighty thousand years for other couples our age and partially because we've both finally graduated and have finished our undergrad careers, my friends and family have been dropping hints here and there about when he's gunna propose to me. Part of me that sort of enjoys fantasizing/wondering about it, but I also just...wanna keep that to myself. I don't want to talk about that to my friends and family yet. SO and I are still (basically) kids . Fresh outta college, making plans for future (I got a job abroad for a little while, he's looking into taking his next steps for becoming a teacher), we're not...stable enough for that yet. I don't think? And yet I still want to be engaged to him, which is why when anyone else brings it up, I start to get defensive. I don't want to get my hopes up at this moment in time, because I get the feeling it won't happen soon and it probably shouldn't happen soon. (Sidenote: SO and I HAVE talked of being engaged, as a thing we both want very much. Just not when, and really I'm fine with that.) Normally it isn't much of a problem, but lately almost my entire family and friend-base have been making quips about it, and honestly I'm starting to feel very flustered D: How can I politely tell people that I don't want to discuss THAT right now without coming across as too grumpy? I've tried laughing it off and changing the subject, but that only works for a couple of days or so before someone else brings it up. This is probably a huge FirstWorldProblem, but I really don't want my last couple of months before I move abroad to become me turning into a grumpmuffin because people aren't listening when I tell them to stop. Thanks in advance! | Starting to feel pressure to get engaged from friends and family How can I nicely tell people to bugger off and find other ways to satiate their gossip drives? |
Me (F 33) and him (M 33) have been friends for 30 years (grew up on same block). Just to clarify, he is gay and I am straight (just so no one thinks I have a secret crush on him or whatever). I consider him a brother and know him and his whole life better than most of his friends. He got into a relationship with a guy a couple of years ago, moved in with him, and they have a happy life together with a house, cat, etc. He just told me that they plan to get married soon and I just can't fake being happy for him. I am not jealous in the least, I am just stuck on the fact that I just don't think this guy is right for him and my friend is not truly happy in the relationship. What clouds his judgment, I feel, is that his bf has a LOT of money and basically takes care of everything, debt, clothes, food, bills, and now my friend just quit his job and lives as a house husband essentially. They have nothing in common that I can see, and the whole thing just feels fake. I don't like lying about how I feel so anything I say that is a positive reinforcement comes off seeming dishonest and not genuine. I know he can feel it, because he knows me so well, but I think he thinks I'm jealous of his situation which makes me even more uncomfortable because I am not. He just doesn't want to believe how I really feel, or he is hurt by my inability to truly be happy for him. So, question, what should I do? Should I continue to fake it, try harder to fake it, tell him how I really feel once and for all (obviously chancing that our friendship will be permanently damaged) - should I distance myself from the situation? For the record, I have other friends who are in committed relationships or married and I do not harbor these feelings because all of their significant others are amazing people, are perfect for my friends and I can tell they are really truly happy and in love. My friend's bf is a great guy too, but they don't appear the same way to me as other friends and the bf and I do not have a relationship at all - he is very awkward and standoffish to everyone. Not in a mean way, more in a socially awkward penguin sort of way. He was also born and raised very rich, something that is completely foreign to me and my friends as we are all from lower to middle class working families. Thoughts? | Best friend is getting married, I feel like the relationship is fake, and I can't fake support and happiness for him, what should I do? |
Was in a relationship with a girl. I really fell for this girl. Though i ruined it by being stupid (broke it off, got scared of how fast things were moving physically). Thought the best way to end a year relationship would be to do it like a bandaid, fast and quick. Obviously that didn't work. Made the break up much harder and emotional. Have since moved on, (both of us). Though she still plagues my mind. I am now single, and she has recently found a new man. Since she began dating him, she has completely refused contact with me or anything. (our talking relationship has been very sporadic at long periods of time with no communication. like around once every 8 months) So basically, she haunts my mind. I do not want a relationship but i do wish i could talk to her, maybe be cordial. Not completely denied of her. I fell for her in a different way than any other girl. Anyway I'm trying to keep it strait and to the point and not ramble. If there are questions please ask and i can elaborate more. | dated a girl, she stole my heart, i ended it like an idiot. nasty break up. both of us have moved on. Though i still think about her and care. She plagues my mind still and i can't let it go. help? |
When I was 16 junior year in high school there was this kid that was a complete dick to his girlfriend. Now it wasn't any of my business to tell him how to act to his girlfriend but when I saw him push her off her seat at lunch it kind of disturbed me a bit. That day I texted her and said " I saw what happened and I'm sorry." she responded with "Never text me again" I wasn't that phased by it just thought she wanted some alone time. The next day it turns out that she was with her boyfriend, He saw the text and he's looking for trouble from me. Now at the time i was a little under 6 feet, the school Varsity wrestler, a kick boxer, a grappler, and a stick fighter but I knew my limits. The guy wanted to completely beat the shit out of me and started calling me names in the halls. One time he called me a bitch I walked up to him and said," Please apologize for what you said to me." He started getting in my face so I just completely power fucked his face with my elbow. He dropped to the ground and was out cold for a little while. Everyone was watching and security wasn't coming so I got on top of him and was ready to break his wrist when he woke up. As soon as he came to I busted his wrist and he screamed in pain like a little bitch, I could hear his wrist breaking. By that time the school security came and I was suspended for 7 days for fighting. | Douche decides to call me a faggot. Throw and elbow at his face and break his wrist in front on everybody. Only get 7 days suspension. |
Within six months of the relationship, I told him I wouldn't move in with someone without an engagement ring. At about our one year anniversary, he talked about how excited he was for us and couldn't wait to marry me. We definitely had the serious talk. At 1.5 years (now) he has made the decision to buy a house, wants me to move in with him (I asked advice about that already, thanks for the answers!), and things are moving pretty fast! I've been hinting about the ring casually, since we already had a firm talk about marriage I feel awkward bringing it up again. We are moving in together in a few months...but from what I have seen there has been no initiative in getting a ring, asking questions about what I want, and I know he is spending a lot of money because of the house. I know we had a firm conversation about yes, we want to marry each other, yes I need a ring before I will move in with him, this stuff has been said but it feels like he has forgotten that one very important fact... I don't want to nag or rush, but he asked me to move in with him, I am afraid I assumed he remembered the terms that I had stated, and isn't picking up on my reminder "hints." So...how do I bring it up AGAIN? How do I talk to my boyfriend about getting engaged before moving in together AFTER we already decided to move in together? | Told boyfriend we need to get engaged before moving in together, and now we are moving in together/How do I have another conversation about getting engaged? |
Haha I'm more than happy to oblige. So I knew I had to break up with this girl because I just wasn't into it anymore. I was physically attracted to her, but that was about it by this point. So I text her and ask if she wanted to go to Starbucks to hang out for a little. Her response was 'but you don't even like coffee!' I idiotically responded with, "but I know you do, so it's all good!" Or something super corny and cute that I totally should not have said to a girl I was going to break up with. So we're at Starbucks just hanging (I figured I'd tell her when I dropped her off because it would've been real bad to tell her in the place. While we're there, a friend of mine walks in with his girlfriend as well. They stay for a little while and leave, and before I know it, my then-gf gets a text. She has this look of shock on her face and then looks at me and says, "Woah, so-and-so just took him here to breakup with him...that's rough..." Upon hearing this, my heart sunk. I have never been filled with more dread in my entire life than in that moment. Especially given the fact that she responded in such a way that she disapproved of her friend's decision to bring someone to Starbucks to eventually dump them. I could not believe that at the exact time I had brought my gf to Starbucks to break up with her, her friend had brought her bf in to break up with him. The entire rest of the time spent at Starbucks felt like an eternity. I just kept having an internal debate as to what to do. I had put this off long enough and knew it needed to end. So, finally, we get back to her place and I finally drop the bomb on her. Clearly it came out of nowhere for her because her reaction was shock and then just sadness and anger. By the time I got home (literally 3 minutes away) her fb status was a link to the "Single Girls" music video. Good times. | Went to break up with a gf at Starbucks; while there another couple we knew came in and the girl in that relationship did the same exact thing right before I did. Fun times did not ensue. |
Hello Redditors, first post but been on the site for awhile now. I just wanted to ask for everyone's opinion here. I work for a growing urgent care company for almost a year now. I took a big pay cut to come work here but I was miserable at my old job. I'm much happier now because of the awesome people that I work with everyday. The only negative about this job would be the pay rate but I already knew coming in. I get paid by the hour but I can make as much overtime as long as there are shifts open. Now it wouldn't be so bad if my hourly wage were average for my profession in my state which is about $4 lower than average. I can make it up in OT but I would have to put in a lot more hours. Now we are scheduled for a pay raise in about a month or two. The raise is based on our performance reviews. Scores range from 1 to 5 with 5 being the highest. Anybody that scores 4+ in any category will be getting a raise and anybody getting a 5 in any category will be getting a bonus. The amount of the raise and bonus depends on how many 4 and 5s you get. Now I was really looking forward to this as I've been busting my ass for the past year going up and above my job description. Recently my manager told me that most people scored 4s and 5s. I just found out that my regional manager changed the scores to mostly 3s and 4s. So that means that nobody at our site will be getting a bonus. His reasoning for this is that he doesn't believe anybody deserves a 5. But this is unbelievable because we have consistently been top in the region in patient satisfaction. I believe he is trying to keep the scores low to save the company money by giving a lower raise and no bonuses. He has also cut everybody's hours from 40 to 32. We have talked to our manager about this and she is trying to get the regional manager to change our scores back. But nothing has been working. At this point I'm not sure what I can do or who I can bring this issue up with. Should I contact HR? I do not have any solid proof that he has done this but my manager is willing to back us up. Any advice would be helpful. I'm really trying not to find a job elsewhere as this is the first job I found where I don't dread going to work. FYI, I am 31 and a professional at the work I do and had to get a special certification in order to work. | regional manager deliberately keeping performance review scores low so the company can save money by giving lower raises and no bonuses Sorry no potato. Thanks for everybody's time. |
Oh that reminds me of a trip to Ibiza a few years back when I was still young enough to enjoy it. We convinced a friend to take E but gave him two tablets of viagra instead. But he managed to get E from someone else anyway. Cue 5AM and we find him getting kicked out by bouncers, covered in puke and with a huge erection. He was rolling around in the street with this horrifying bulge in his pants and a wild look on his face. We carried him back to the hotel and because he was so covered in puke and detritus we put him in the shower. Except he found the whole ordeal hilarious and started charging at us, brandishing his stiff member like a knife. We had to hold him under the shower with a mop we found while he laughed at us and absently tugged on himself. We were all horrified and thought it was over, but he broke out of the bathroom and rushed us again. He rushed straight at my best mate who shrieked and tried to back out. He then fell behind the bed and the erect-drunkard advanced to screams of "NO!!! NOOO!!!!" The next thing we hear is a squeal and the drunkard flee's the scene cupping himself, with teary eyes. | and ending - My best mate desperately fended off a drunken friend who was spiked with viagra and chasing us around a hotel room naked and stiff by slapping his erect penis with a flip flop he found in a a moment of terror |
Sorry so long! During my high school career I was very ill-prepared for college. I had an indecisive mind and went because it was 'what I am supposed to do' and no one in my family had a degree. I graduated from a local university with a hefty amount of loans and a 3.5 GPA. Unfortunately, my major was switched twice and I ended up learning gobs about psychology, kinesiology/bio-mechanics, and various aspects of health science. For the sake of saving money, I opted to compile these courses and complete a degree in General Health Science - not a bright idea, I know. So, now I'm stuck. I cannot get a legitimate job with this degree. I'm currently a Community Living Support Specialist and Personal Trainer. I've applied to Occupational Therapy programs across the US and am awaiting responses. I'm afraid I will not love it, though. I have a very technical mind. I also have a very, very creative mind. Next to this, I have an extremely analytical mind and a strange knack for detective-like-putting-things-together work. Any ideas on what may be right for me, if OT falls through? Or how I could obtain a MSOT and later mix it with something that would allow for the better parts of me to be shown? | High school left me indecisive, started college, changed major, changed major, graduated with crap degree, not sure what to do or what I want to do. Applying for OT, not sure I'll like it. Want to mix it w/ creative, analytical, technical parts of who I am. |
Low back pain hits most people over the course of their lives (estimates range up to 80%) but what your dad has sounds like a more severe case of run of the mill LBP. In the US, there is an unfortunate financial incentive to do surgery. The surgeon often isn't consciously aware of how the medical culture has shifted towards surgery as the major option. Therefore, I think your route of getting advice from a medical group that is less influenced by the cut-first mentality is sound. If they are still (and second/third opinions are worth getting) recommending surgery, then surgery may be your best option. Surgery, however, is often not helpful in the long term. (looking for free-access publications on this) The Journal of the American Medical Association has some of Weinstein's surgery vs non papers for free [one]( [two]( Basically, they say the surgical outcome is about as successful as nonsurgical treatment. This is not a unique conclusion. However , this is a "over a whole bunch of people" conclusion. Individual cases vary quite a lot. Your dad's situation may be clearly assistable by surgery.. or not. Hence recommending the extra medical opinions. krispykrackers's post is very good recovery advice. No matter the type of back surgery, your attitude going in and the amount of effort you put into resuming normal activities are huge predictors of overall outcomes. The muscles have been disturbed and the spinal kinematics aren't normal anymore. You have to relearn how to use the muscles to bend this "new spine." That takes dedication and a fair amount of pain. People learn to work with it, and they learn how to function or they never put in the time to learn it and they don't. Though, I should add, having "a bad day" isn't a failure on the part of the patient. | Get a second/third opinion. If surgery is still the recommended option be prepared to do some hard work during recovery. It isn't the end of the world but a lot of recovery depends on the patient. |
As a background, my boyfriend and I are both Caribbean medical school students of Middle Eastern descent. Both of our families play huge roles in our lives and have supported/sacrificed our path through school. We have dated mostly long distance for three years and have been committed, loving, supportive, faithful for all the struggles and stresses of school, moving, loneliness, traumatizing family deaths, financial crises, throughout that time. He has been my guide and support, and I have been his. I would choose him as my life partner, based on his character, without a second thought; and I know he feels the same for me. Here is where the issue begins. He failed the medical school step 1 exam a year ago. Meaning he may never become a doctor (I really can't estimate his chances). This has caused us a lot of pain, because if he doesn't manage to achieve his MD; He will be $350,000 in student debt, 31 years old, and so financially unstable that it could be years before he could comfortably begin a family. Additionally, my family would make it impossible for us to be together; and to be honest, culturally, I feel as if I would be abandoning my family if I were to go against them for a relationship. Not only that, my family comes from a Shia background that is largely agnostic (I was raised agnostic and ignorant of cultural clashes that exist in general in the world). However my boyfriends family is orthodox Sunni and racist against Shia people. I don't know how open or not they are about me; as my boyfriend has never given a straight answer. One time he says that his dad is okay with me, and another time he will say he doesn't know. I know for sure his Mother would prefer him to be with someone else. But I don't know if she isn't outright opposing him because she sees me as a phase. (He has told me that she doesn't see me as a serious relationship). He has said he wants to leave his overbearing family after he's done school and no longer needs their support. But I would never allow him to do that for our relationship. Am I holding on for nothing? Are there just too many obstacles for me to wait potentially two more years for a commitment? I'm 26 and it scares me to think that at 28 I would have to go back into the dating game, and after I'm done school. But most importantly my parents communicate with and know my boyfriend well; I'm afraid that if I wait out this relationship and it fails, that I would be embarrassing myself and destroying my credibility with them. I want them to trust that any man I choose is the right choice; and if this relationship falls apart after half a decade, it would make every relationship to follow a difficult experience with my family. Thanks for reading! And thanks for replying <3 | His parents may hate me more then he admits (I do not want to commit to family which I'm not welcome), his career may be more off the rails then he wants to acknowledge. Should I stay, or should I go? |
My friend just moved to another city and is town for a few days. He asked if he could crash on my couch. I have no problems with this, he is a good dude. However my roommtes are not a fan of him. They have never given a reason but I know they are not. He's never done anything wrong to them, he does come across as sketchy though. Both roommates are at work and won't be home until after I tell my friend if he can crash or not. The worst part is I will probably run into him at the bar tonight so not responding will be tough. I'm just hoping he finds a place before I run into him but that might not happen (a lot of my friends have bachelor apartments). Also, he's always been a really good dude to me and I know if I was in his situation he wouldn't hesitate. I don't think my roommates will listen to this reasoning. I'm heading out in two hours so I hope someone has an idea | I have a buddy who seems sketchy but really isn't. Needs a place to crash. Roommates are not a fan of him. Edit: My friend found a place to crash. Thanks reddit |
Whenever my girlfriend drinks she tries to fight with me. Why? because she's crazy but I love her so I deal with it. She slams like 4 shots which to a normal person would be like 11. I try to catch up but she's gone. She says drive me home I'm bored. I calmly tell her its a bad idea because we're drunk and drunk driving is illegal and stupid. She flips her shit tells me I'm being controlling and storms outside. Tried to stop her but she gets in her car and drunk drives her ass to God knows where. Finally like 20 mins later I get a call she says she's at her friends house and starts telling me what a dick I am. I hangup because its best to just ignore her when she gets like this. I go upstairs throw in a fat lip of my favorite dipping tobacco and watch some TV. Well somewhere in my drunken stupor my brain takes over and I swallow that fat hog leg of a dip. I gag. Try to hold it down. It's not working and I stumble to the bathroom pass my roommates girlfriend (or so I thought) and puke my brains out and miss the toilet. I hear screaming from the other room. Laying there in my own puke hiccuping uncontrollably. Everything goes black. I come to and my room mate is standing there. I'm ass naked in she shower with freezing water hitting me. I freak out fall out of the shower face first and ask him what happened. He tells me I came out of my room and made a noise not unlike a retarded horse and puked all over his girlfriend who was trying to brush her teeth. I then fell into the bathroom pulling her shirt down and exposing her tits puked all over myself and passed out. He was cleaning me off. Call my girlfriend ask if she's okay turns out she ended up just driving home and passing out. Room mates girlfriend is traumatized and won't look me in the eye. | drank 11 shots fought with girlfriend swallowed dip and puked on room mates girlfriend accidentally tore her shirt off and puked on myself woke up naked in a freezing shower |
I usually keep this under wraps on my other accounts, but I have Borderline Personality Disorder. I recently started therapy in an attempt to improve my situation and to help learn how to be not/less abusive towards the people I love in my life. However, I still have times where I slip and freak out and during those times my dad doesn't know how to help me. A lot of the time he is away at work (he flies up north to the oil sands for a week at a time, then spends a week at home). But even when he's at home, he has expressed to me that he feels powerless to help, that he has tried everything and doesn't know what to do anymore. I think sharing my DBT (Dialectal Behaviour Therapy) workbook with him would help him feel less "powerless". My dad isn't really an emotional guy. His identity is that of a helper and a provider. He has trouble interacting and comforting me on an emotional level, so I think that if he had access to the same things I do now, he would be able to engage in the way of coping mechanisms instead of how illogical I'm being and getting upset. I want my dad to be a part of my recovery because I live with him, and probably will for a long time, and he is the most important person in my life. The thing is, I don't know how to bring it up, or how to portray to him how important this is to me without making it sound like I'm demanding him to do something. I have Asperger's on top of my BPD and my social skills are very poor. I can express myself well in writing but verbally, I don't think fast enough or know enough about talking to people to properly portray my thoughts without offending him. Hence, why I'm here. How should I approach my dad? Is there an opportune time? What should I say? How do I make the conversation a positive experience? | I want to share my DBT workbook with my dad so he has tools to deal with me, but I have poor social skills and I don't know how to properly formulate the conversation I need to have with him. |