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Multi-Questioner_Dialogue

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[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "There’s no room. His sister is staying with him." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Wait, wait. What?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "No, it’s Leslie Winkle. It’s a long story." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I’ll pick you up in ten minutes. Gentlemen, adieu." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I thought we were going to play Halo tonight." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Bad, very bad." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Really, ‘cos you don’t look like you’re swelling up at all, maybe we should just pick up some benedryl at the drug store and go home." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "We can’t go home." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Why not?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Becauth (pretends tongue has swollen up) Becauth-th-th. Brissket, Brissket! Water, need water." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Alright, I’ll be right back." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "My guess is, “Hey, four minutes! New record!” That’s why I’m the funny one." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Anyway, we followed the guy to this garage sale, and they had the coolest stuff." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "They were closing up. We got this whole box for sixty bucks." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "We didn’t even get to go through it all. There could be anything in here." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Okay, just so you know, if we’re bringing in cousins who are lawyers, prepare for shock and awe." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You know what? I am ending this. Penny didn’t want to hold the ring anymore. She gave it to me, I have it. I’m sending it back. Where’s the ring?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Okay, now, this is ridiculous!" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Then let go!" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I’m not letting go, you let go." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I say this ring belongs to the last person who can hold on." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Fine. But can’t we go home and start this?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Sorry, but we can’t sign this." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Come on, let’s go." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Thank you for your time." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "It is our pleasure. (beep, beep, beep) Hey, can you hold on one sec? Hello?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Hey, buddy, you still looking for a place to live?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Oh, I don’t know. I kind of promised myself I’d get off the computer, be more physically active. Get some exercise." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "You’re about to walk up three flights of stairs." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Good point, I’m in." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Turn off our phones so our moms can’t call." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "It would be like our World Of Warcraft a few years ago when the neighbours called the cops on us." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Oh, honey, I am in no mood to have sex tonight. I’ll lay there if you absolutely have to have it, but… Oh. What are you guys doing here?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "When you left, you weren’t sure whether or not you wanted to know what was in your dad’s letter, so we came up with kind of a cool solution." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "It said right there on the invitation, buckle up for fun. It’s not my fault you didn’t listen." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I’m sure I’m overreacting." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "While we finish soldering these boards, it’d be great if you guys could wrap these pipe fittings with Teflon tape." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I’ll show you how to do one." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "And it helps to have small, delicate fingers. So don’t be discouraged if you can’t do it as fast as me and Howard." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I don’t know if we have enough solder to finish these circuit boards." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "We had a full spool yesterday." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "They bought it." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "But we’re gonna have to put the spare on before we go back." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Oh, you’re good at this." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "See you, Stuart." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Hey, Howard?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Yes." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Take me to a bar with women." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Really?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yeah." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Okay! Let me just go inside and slip off my underwear." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Why?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Hmm? Oh, I’m sorry. I was somewhere else." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Lucky bastard." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Yeah. Excuse me for a moment." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Hey, how’s it going." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Cut the crap, you set this up, didn’t you?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yes." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "It could be fun. I know my weekend’s wide open, now that…" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Okay, then let’s do this, lets go to Las Vegas." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Now? Right now?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Why not? People do things right now all the time. Why can’t we be right now people too. Go home, pack a bag and we’ll be right now people. I have to stop at the drug store to refill a prescription, but after that we’ll go right now." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Come on, let’s go." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "You guys go ahead, I just have to finish up an email." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "That’s not an email, that’s Leslie’s facebook page." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Don’t tell me where to go." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Howard, just come in here." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "I don’t know what my next move is." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Well, Howard, I don’t know much about women." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Yeah?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "No, uh, that, that’s it. I don’t know much about women. Raj, you got anything?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Let’s do it." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Penny’s busy with my mother, so I’m in." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "We could sit on the left side of the couch." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I could use the bathroom at 8:20." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "We’re not really gonna go to the North Pole with him, are we?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Hang on. Let’s talk about it. This is a National Science Foundation expedition. I don’t know how we can turn it down." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "You heard the man. Hold him down and I’ll cut him open." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Hang on, I know I don’t possess the tools of leadership, but I don’t understand why we can’t assemble the equipment inside the hut and then take it outside." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Shut up." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "If you’d like, we can help you out." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Oh, that would be great." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Okay, so we know we’re going to do it Sunday morning. Now we need to find a good place for the satellite to see us." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "How about our roof?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Okay, that’s it, let’s boot it up." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Booting." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "I just checked the house, there’s probably twenty, twenty-five people in there." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You’re kidding." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Let’s roll. Hey, nice suit." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "It’s a classic, right?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Oh, hey, Leonard, how was your date?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Bite me. Sheldon, how could you just sit there and let them spy on me?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Okay, alright, let’s assume your hypothesis. We went to dinner, we talked, we laughed, we kissed, where could I have possibly gone wrong." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Think back, Leonard, the littlest things can set women off. Like, hey, the waitress is hot, I bet we could get her to come home with us. Or, how much does your mom weigh, I want to know what I’m getting into." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I didn’t say anything like that." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I’m gonna ask her if she’d be willing to talk to Penny, tell her she has nothing to worry about." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Leonard, wait." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Leonard, come on." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Fine. I’ll ask if she has a friend for you." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "A hot friend." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Right." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "And tall. I want our kids to be able to ride space mountain before they’re 20." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I’ll see what I can do." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Okay. No. Leonard’s right. We’re here to focus. Didn’t we used to have a list of all our ideas?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I, I think I still have it." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "I didn’t think they were going to. I just wanted to have a way to say no without hurting Leonard’s feelings." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Well, nailed it." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Yeah, well, Raj, I just want to say that I’d never betray your trust. Unlike Leonard, I respect you." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Really?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Mmm." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Was it out of respect that you didn’t tell Raj about the time you dropped his iPhone in a urinal?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Leonard, Penny, you know my girlfriend Bernadette." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yeah. Hey." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Where were you?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I was working with Dave Underhill." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Ooh, “Dave.” Sounds like Leonard’s got a new BFF." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Actually, he’s pretty cool. I mean, not only is he a brilliant scientist, but it turns out he’s a Black Diamond skier, he collects vintage motorcycles, he plays in a rock band." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "So? We’re in a rock band." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "No, we play Rock Band on our X-Box." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Honest to God. Leonard, tell her I have a girlfriend." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I don’t know what you’re talking about." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "What do you mean you don’t know what I’m talking about? Tell her I have a girlfriend!" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "All right. He “has” a “girlfriend.”" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Then call your own mother. (To Leonard) It was Sheldon." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I tried to stop you." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "It’s my own fault, I forgot the protocol we put in place after the great ear infection of ’06." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You call Koothrappali, we need to find a place to lay low for the next eighteen to twenty four hours." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Uh, sorry, Raj. Howard and I are going out to dinner with Penny and Bernadette." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Yeah, no more carefree bachelor nights for me and Leonard. These broncos have been saddled." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "How did we get actual women?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "We liked Leonard." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Well, what are you going to do, Sheldon, give up?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Oh, my God. Leonard, someone’s stealing your car!" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What? Hey, hey! Come back here!" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I’m sorry. Can we please just do it one more time?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Okay. 1, 2, 1, 2, 3 and… (Leonard, Howard and Raj whistle “Sweet Georgia Brown” together)" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "It’s a little thing but you really do miss it." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Leonard, you can get a little asthma inhaler." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Oh, this is neat. Think about all the action figures we’ve bought over the years. It would be kind of cool to have ones that look like us. Don’t you think?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Come on, Leonard, let’s go" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "No. You can leave if you want to. I’m gonna see this through." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Okay. (They leave)" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I guess, technically, that was my fault. (Knocks) I’m not leaving here without Penny’s money." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Wait a minute. Leonard made you aware of that?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "We all make mistakes, let’s move on." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Leonard, where do you stand on giant rabbits and scrotal position?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I honestly don’t care." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "You know what? I’m with Leonard, this isn’t cool." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Thank you." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Um…" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Classified, Leonard." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yeah, it’s a regular Manhattan Project. What’s up?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Oh, it’s very simple. Leonard was living in a little town called please don’t leave me, while Penny had just moved to the island of bye-bye." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Screw you guys. I’m gonna go see if she’s home." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "I’ll show you a picture of my Uncle Louie in a bathing suit sometime. Leonard, you gotta see this, we found a match for Sheldon." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Great. Maybe she can have sex with him, and then walk out on him the next morning without so much as a how do you do?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Hmm, maybe not. Leonard?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "So, when the aliens brought you back, they just left the probe in?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Leonard, I may have gotten you a job." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I have a job." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yeah." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I’m proud of you, Leonard. Working out on the North Sea for months, that’s really something." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I know. As far as science goes, this is the adventure of a lifetime." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Maybe your lifetime. I went to space." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "It’s not a competition." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Don’t just stand there, slash and move, slash and move." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Stay in formation." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Leonard, you’ve got one on your tail." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "That’s alright, my tail’s prehensile, I’ll swat him off." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Leonard look out!" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Dammit man, we’re dying here." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I’m not the fish." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Oh really, did you make a second date." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Well, we sort of decided to wing it." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Hey, if I wasn’t engaged to Bernadette, that totally could have been me." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Please. Sheldon would have been before you, and he might not even have genitals." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You realize if the military declares our research classified, they can take the whole thing away from us." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "And if that happens, we’ll never be able to sell it commercially." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "There goes our big payday." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I was counting on that money. I need to make as much as my wife so I don’t have to try so hard in bed." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You do that, too?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Hand me the tuna melt." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yep." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Thank you. How’s it going with the long-distance love affair?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Not easy, but we’re making it work." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "When you say making it work, does that include doing the cyber nasty?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Hey, Leonard jiggling his junk at her through a webcam has got to be easier for you to deal with than him actually touching her with it." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "There’s no junk jiggling. We just talk." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Are you insane? With high-speed Internet, you have at your fingertips the greatest advancement in the field of sex since the invention of the washcloth." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I can’t do that." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I don’t know about this, Howard." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "What? You’re having trouble with the long-distance lovemaking. This is your answer. There are two interfaces that simulate a human mouth. You have one, Priya has one in India. When you move your lips and tongue on yours, it transmits exactly what you’re doing to hers. See? Internet kissing. (Howard kisses device) Give it a try." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I don’t think so." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Oh, is the missus speaking for the couple now?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "In this case, you bet she is." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Oh, I’d so do her." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You’d do the dolphins." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You know, you never told me what happened between you and Bernadette." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I did a stupid thing." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yeah, I guessed that." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "It was the kind of thing that makes it kind of hard to face her now." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "That covers anything from farting in bed to killing a homeless guy. Oh, my God. You ran over a hobo." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "No. Stop asking." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "All right, fine. So you want to get back together with her, but you’re too ashamed to face her because of whatever it is you did." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "It was the kind of thing that makes it kind of hard to face her now." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "That covers anything from farting in bed to killing a homeless guy. Oh, my God. You ran over a hobo." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "No. Stop asking." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "All right, fine. So you want to get back together with her, but you’re too ashamed to face her because of whatever it is you did." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "In a nutshell." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Okay. Well, how about this? Kidnap Bernadette from the opera wearing a creepy mask so she doesn’t know it’s you." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "That reminds me, I have a bone to pick with you." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "You and I made a pact that if either of us ever got a hot girlfriend, that person would have his girlfriend hook the other guy up with one of her girlfriends." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yeah, I don’t remember that." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "So, how’d it go?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "It was going well. I was showing this super hot girl how to boot up in Safe Mode. The manager got suspicious, and, well, long story short, they really do have a little jail in the mall." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Just FYI, don’t try to go back with a fake moustache. I mean, they may not really be geniuses, but they see right through that." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I want to invoke the girlfriend pact, Howard." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "You that desperate?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "No, I just, I want what you have. You know, I want a woman in my life." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Oh, hey. I hope you didn’t hear that." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "The volcano thing? No." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "What’s with the T-shirt? You working at the Apple store now?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "No, it’s just something I threw on." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I know all your shirts. That’s not one of them. You were pretending to work at the Genius Bar to pick up women, weren’t you?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yeah. Turns out, they guard the iPods, but they don’t guard the shirts." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "No, it’s just something I threw on." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I know all your shirts. That’s not one of them. You were pretending to work at the Genius Bar to pick up women, weren’t you?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yeah. Turns out, they guard the iPods, but they don’t guard the shirts." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "So, how’d it go?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "It was going well. I was showing this super hot girl how to boot up in Safe Mode. The manager got suspicious, and, well, long story short, they really do have a little jail in the mall." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Come on, just give her a chance. Maybe she’ll grow on you." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Or maybe she’ll finally succeed in ripping my nuts off. There are still 93 ways she hasn’t tried yet. Look, Howard, I appreciate the effort, but this is, like, the worst date of my life." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Seriously? I was once robbed by a pre-op transsexual I met on J-Date, and that didn’t even crack my top ten." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I guess the difference is, I have some self-respect." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Seriously? I was once robbed by a pre-op transsexual I met on J-Date, and that didn’t even crack my top ten." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I guess the difference is, I have some self-respect." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Not that I’ve ever seen." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "It’s relatively new. I just know that I’m not gonna spend time with someone I don’t like simply to have a girlfriend. I’m okay on my own." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "How does it feel knowing your fiancée’s job is to go out and flirt with doctors, looking like that, while you sit here, you know, looking like this?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "She doesn’t flirt with doctors." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Yeah, I just wanna put it out there in case I inadvertently squirt any pheromones in your direction. Happy? (Raj nods)." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "So, uh, Priya, what are your plans while you’re here." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Sadly, Mrs. Giselle Wolowitz is sensitive to chlorine. Lucky for her I like my fashion models pruny and bug-eyed." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Sheldon, the food’s here." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I don’t know that I’d call myself an infection." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "A gallant man would defend his fiancée for being called a urethra." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Can we please change the subject?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "A neg is a negative compliment that throws a pretty woman off her game, like “Normally, I’m not turned on by big teeth, but on you, they work.” I’ve got a whole list of ’em. Who wants to be my wingman?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You’re not gonna need wingman, you’re gonna need a paramedic." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Olive you, too." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Guys, that’s really starting to get old." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Knock-knock." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Who’s there?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I have a girlfriend and you don’t." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Hysterical!" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Yeah, I picked her up in the bar. She’s a doctor. One free barium enema and my mother won’t care she’s not Jewish." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Wait a minute, so the eye patch and the insults worked?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "A big kiss. On the mouth." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Is it possible that she was going for your cheek and you moved and she accidentally got lip? That happens with me and my mom all the time." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "She introduced me to her father, kissed me and then shut the door in my face." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Maybe she was trying to send you a message." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You think?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Is it possible that she was going for your cheek and you moved and she accidentally got lip? That happens with me and my mom all the time." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "She introduced me to her father, kissed me and then shut the door in my face." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Maybe she was trying to send you a message." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You think?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Yeah. This man is not my father. I’m being held hostage. So I’m going to do something insane in the hopes that you’ll call 911." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Penny kissing me is not insane. She used to kiss me all the time." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What did I do now?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I was in bed with Bernadette, and you text-blocked me." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "We were completely naked, about to devour each other when, you text her that I have a problem with her hanging out with you." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You do have a problem with her hanging out with me." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Yeah, but that’s not what you tell her." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What was I supposed to tell her?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I don’t know, something that doesn’t make me come off as a petty, jealous douche." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "And what would that be?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Okay, good, ’cause I wasn’t really gonna go." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Look, I know I come off as confident and worldly, but the truth is I’m not." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "We’re shocked." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Which is why I tend to feel threatened by other guys." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Or loud noises, clowns and nuns." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "But I now realize how foolish that is." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "He had a panic attack once when he got his head stuck in a sweater." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "It was a full turtleneck. Why aren’t you helping me?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I don’t know. Maybe because I’m crazy?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I don’t know, I think we might owe the guy an apology." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "So go apologize." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Why me?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "You started it, we just piled on." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What would I even say?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You guys are making me nervous." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Fine, then go talk to her on your own." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I will. Excuse me." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yeah, just back there." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "How about that? After all these years, your big bad high school bully finally apologizes." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yeah. It kind of rekindles your faith in the basic goodness of people." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "You know what I think your problem is? You’re jealous because you and I used to be best friends until Koothrappali came along." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "And you found somebody you could push around?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Can we please move this along?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yeah, sorry. Uh, you come to the end of the tunnel and find a large chest. What do you do? And, Howard, do not say, I feel up the large chest." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Excuse me, I’m a married man now. I wasn’t going to say anything so juvenile." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Great. What do you do?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Howard, artificial women are your department. You want to take this?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "No, it would just freak him out. Listen, before we leave, I should warn you, I’m a passionate man and I tend towards public displays of affection." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "What are you trying to tell me, Howard?" } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "It’s right off the dust jacket of my mom’s last book." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Maybe me and Bernadette aren’t right for each other." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Look, Howard, I’d say there’s a lot of fish in the sea, but I watched you dangle your hook in the water for years. Do not throw her back." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Okay, so we now have a socially awkward genius in a room full of attractive age-appropriate women." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "All he has to do now is hook up with one of them. (The look at Dennis, who is picking his ear.)" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Does anyone else see the flaw in this plan?" } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "I guess times have changed since we were young. Smart is the new sexy." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Well, why do we go home alone every night, we’re still smart." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "That sounds more like, we are a tall thin woman who wants to make a coat out of your Dalmatians." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Guys, let’s remember that Sheldon is still our friend and my room mate." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "So?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "So nothing, let’s destroy him." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "You’ve been talking about breaking up with Emily forever. Why don’t you just do it already?" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yeah, just get it over with." } ]

[ { "from": "Howard", "value": "Excuse me, my girlfriend doesn’t pick out my clothes. My mother does." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Oh. We should get going." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Priya’s in town?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Yeah, some work thing. Anyway, my mother seems to think that Bernadette…" }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Hold on. When did Priya get here?" }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "I don’t know. A couple of days ago. The thing is, Bernadette doesn’t like that I have to take care of my mother, and my mother doesn’t trust Bernadette." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "Yeah, that’s a real pickle. Bye." } ]

[ { "from": "Leonard", "value": "It was Penny’s boyfriend’s, they broke up." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Apparently he posted intimate details of their physical relationship on his blog, which I cannot find anywhere." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "You know what, I’m going to go back and try talking to her again." }, { "from": "Howard", "value": "Good idea. Sit with her, hold her, comfort her, and if the moment feels right, see if you can cop a feel." }, { "from": "Leonard", "value": "I’m not going to do that, Howard." } ]