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{ "author": "Jessica747", "content": "How do you guys help your friends when they are having a panic attack? And how do you want your friends to help you? Me and my best friend both suffer from them, so of course we are understanding, I'm just curious to see what everyone else thinks/ any tips that people may have, thanks everyone have a lovely day please :)\n", "date": "1424250989", "thread_id": "18366", "title": "Panic Attacks & Friends", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacksFriends_18366/" }

[ { "author": "starryRiver83", "content": "<p>If you both know what causes the panic attacks, support each other. If you or your friend is having a panic attack, the other person needs to stay calm at the very least. Try to keep a calm tone with the other person, because panicking doesn't help. Talk about breathing, try to get them thinking about their breathing techniques, tell them when to inhale and exhale. Not to focus on their surroundings, even if it means looking to the floor. Whenever my mum notices me having a panic attack she takes me out of the room and sits me down and talks me through everything. That really helps. However, if you both know each other's triggers for panic attacks, try to be there for each other by any means when such triggers come about, and maybe practice some of the breathing techniques beforehand. I hope this has maybe helped a little.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "150309", "thread_id": "18366", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacksFriends_18366/" }, { "author": "Jessica747", "content": "<p>Thanks Starry! That was insightful to hear, I think what your mum does for you sounds great!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "150309,nil" ], "post_id": "150316", "thread_id": "18366", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacksFriends_18366/" }, { "author": "Jessica747", "content": "<p>Thanks Starry! That was insightful to hear, I think what your mum does for you sounds great!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "150309,nil" ], "post_id": "150320", "thread_id": "18366", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacksFriends_18366/" }, { "author": "ShadesofBlack", "content": "<p>I have a friend with panic disorder. The best thing I have found is to speak calmly, and reassure the person, encourage slow breathing. Even gentle touch, like holding their hand, if you know that's ok with the person beforehand</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "150387", "thread_id": "18366", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacksFriends_18366/" }, { "author": "Jessica747", "content": "", "parent_ids": [ "150387,nil" ], "post_id": "150703", "thread_id": "18366", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacksFriends_18366/" } ]

{ "author": "angel2706", "content": "Hi , i suffer from anxiety everything always stresses me out what ppl think of me ect and more problems with my bf sometime i feel like i had enough pain and wana give up. i dont eat and losing weight and if i eat i have to run to the bathroom any advise is welcome i have talked about wht is troubling me and nothing is working i saty the same\n", "date": "1424175069", "thread_id": "18308", "title": "almost feel like giving up", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/almostfeellikegivingup_18308/" }

[ { "author": "StrawberryM", "content": "", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "150504", "thread_id": "18308", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/almostfeellikegivingup_18308/" } ]

{ "author": "LittleLily", "content": "Dear Miss Durkin,\nI feel awfully bad for bothering you, and I hope that you can forgive me for that. I knew that I needed help and that I would need to talk to someone. But when you're as shy as I am, it is hard to come by people that will actually listen. I considered many people, observing each one carefully. I believed that your personality seemed to match the one I had in mind. The sexual harassment thing was not the reason I wanted to talk to you. You didn't ask if anything else was wrong so I didn't tell you. I remember it all vividly. I trusted you. After that day, you started acting very differently around me. You stopped talking to me. You walk past me like I am indiscernible. I felt as if I could cry I was so confused. I trusted you. It is very uncommon for me to experience the feeling of trust. Trust is like a diamond--so rare and precious that it takes time, persistence, and determination to find. But when you do find it, it is the best feeling in the world. With a past of abandonment, this feeling is completely unknown to me. There is something about you that contents me, and makes me feel safe. I appreciate Mr. Johnson trying to help me. He is nice and I like him very much. Though the fact that he is a man intimidates me and makes me feel uncomfortable. You seemed like you wanted to hand me off to him and be done with me. He is very kind, though I feel that he isn't the right person for me. I chose you. I picked you myself. You are the only person that I feel comfortable talking too. I appreciate Mr. Johnson's effort, it truly means more to me than words can explain. But I chose you. All this is over with the boy, but my broken spirit remains fractured. I am sorry I dragged you into this, I should have never trusted in the first place. All that trusting ever brings me is abandonment and regret. I am but a child, and sometimes I do stupid, stupid things. My innocence is leaving me, one piece at a time. I am no longer that cute, sweet little girl that I once was. The feelings of isolation and self doubt are taking over and I am not powerful enough to fight them away. Reliance and certainty are two things that I lack. I am not at all suicidal, so please don't report this or call my mother. Setting me up with someone that I did not choose myself will only make me feel incarcerated and cause stress and anxiety. I appreciate your attempt to help, but this whole incident has led me to perceive that the only person I can trust is myself.\n~Lilyrose 👧🐰😇\nThis note is for my PE teacher, who has gotten me help for my sexual harrassment. The school forced me to see a counselor whom I do not connect with. Miss Durkin is the only person I trust, I am 13. She laughs with me when I'm happy and cries with me when I'm sad. I feel so safe when she is standing next to me. After I opened up to her, she started distancing herself from me. Please give me your opinions on my letter-thank you\n\n \n", "date": "1424188788", "thread_id": "18331", "title": "Just a little girl with a meaningful letter", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/Justalittlegirlwithameaningfulletter_18331/" }

[ { "author": "TransAm85", "content": "<p>This letter sounds like my own personality, except I prefer it easier to talk to men instead of women. I'm far older than you, but if you know now that there are problems either at home or otherwise, you need to take care of them b/c it's going to effect you as an adult. My mother was never the nurturing type and my father left when I was about five. I've done every rebellious thing possible and that is why school and a career never lasted for me. If you find talking to teachers helpful, that's your decision, but either way, you can't block out the truth of the matter. Some parents aren't really parents. Some friends are just friends for the moment and status. You have to take care of you before anything.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "149571", "thread_id": "18331", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/Justalittlegirlwithameaningfulletter_18331/" }, { "author": "LittleLily", "content": "<p>I am sorry but I can't understand what you are saying</p>", "parent_ids": [ "149571,nil" ], "post_id": "149720", "thread_id": "18331", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/Justalittlegirlwithameaningfulletter_18331/" }, { "author": "TransAm85", "content": "<p>I know you are young, but you seem to be looking for guidance in other places than home. I can relate to that b/c I didn't have much of a family.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "149720,149571,nil" ], "post_id": "149803", "thread_id": "18331", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/Justalittlegirlwithameaningfulletter_18331/" } ]

{ "author": "charmingZebra76", "content": "Hello all. \n\nThis morning I had an information meeting for a graduate program I'm applying to. Driving in unfamilar places is the biggest, most consistent trigger to my panic attacks. I got lost on the way to the meeting, and I had a panic attack while driving. I had to pull over because I was hyperventilating, and I had no idea where I was. Eventually found the building where the meeting was being held, but by then the meeting was almost over, and I was still tearful and struggling to breathe. Once I regained my composure, I decided to just turn around and go home.\n\nAt this point, I'm not sure what the appropriate thing to do is. Should I tell the director who was leading the meeting the truth? After all, I don't think this is something I should have to be ashamed of. Should I keep it vague and say I had a medical emergency? Should I say anything at all? \n", "date": "1423339663", "thread_id": "17876", "title": "Missed a meeting because I had a panic attack while drving. Should I be honest?", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/MissedameetingbecauseIhadapanicattackwhiledrvingShouldIbehonest_17876/" }

[ { "author": "AffyAvo", "content": "<p>I recommend keeping it having a medical issue or something like that. It's more professional to keep the details out of it.</p>\n<p>I've had to get doctors notes multiple times for things relating to graduate school, and the doctors always recommend just keeping it to the effect on what's happening, and not the details of the medical issues..</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "141992", "thread_id": "17876", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/MissedameetingbecauseIhadapanicattackwhiledrvingShouldIbehonest_17876/" }, { "author": "charmingZebra76", "content": "<p>Thank you. That's good advice.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "141992,nil" ], "post_id": "142698", "thread_id": "17876", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/MissedameetingbecauseIhadapanicattackwhiledrvingShouldIbehonest_17876/" }, { "author": "modestZebra2079", "content": "<p>I agree. You could say a medical issue came up and apologize for missing the meeting and ask if you can come in during the week to learn the info you missed. You can also say you got lost on your way to or were having car trouble. When it comes to colleges and the staff/faculty they understand life happens. If you are a reliable and hardworking person, they will understand that life happens and missed meetings happen. I guarantee you weren't the only person that missed the meeting or the only person to have ever missed a meeting in the dept. You don't have to go into detail but definitely reach out, let them know it wasn't your intention to miss the meeting and what you can do to make up for it. Chances are they aren't going to even ask you to go into detail. Once you get to build a family within that environment and you feel safe to give more detail then you can. But you also don't have to. Good luck.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "142038", "thread_id": "17876", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/MissedameetingbecauseIhadapanicattackwhiledrvingShouldIbehonest_17876/" }, { "author": "charmingZebra76", "content": "<p>I believe you're right. Thank you for putting things in perspective. Much appreciated.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "142038,nil" ], "post_id": "142699", "thread_id": "17876", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/MissedameetingbecauseIhadapanicattackwhiledrvingShouldIbehonest_17876/" }, { "author": "charmingZebra76", "content": "<p>Thanks again for the support, everyone. I did email the director the next dayand apologized for missing the meeting. I said I had a medical emergency that morning, but I was doing fine now, and left it at that. He was very understanding and was glad to hear I was okay. There is another session for prospective grad students tomorrow night, and now that I know where I'm going, I don't foresee any problems.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "145337", "thread_id": "17876", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/MissedameetingbecauseIhadapanicattackwhiledrvingShouldIbehonest_17876/" } ]

{ "author": "blitheSun94", "content": "I would like to think I'm fairly self-aware but sometimes I get slammed with a panic-attack while driving. It can be triggered by a paranoid or anxious thought, or a driving mistake that may make my vitals jump, or even too much caffeine before getting in the car. It seems to take place in the car more often, maybe because it is a confined space? I would like to know if this happens to anyone else? Also, any advice in self-soothing would be helpful.\n\n \n\nThank you!\n", "date": "1421796967", "thread_id": "16784", "title": "Panic Attacks While Driving", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacksWhileDriving_16784/" }

[ { "author": "yellowBeechwood38", "content": "<p>Hi there,</p>\n<p>I used to be an extremely nervous driver. I didn't get my beginners until I was 32!</p>\n<p>what helped me was power tools. I was also afraid of those, &amp; mastered them. that have me the confidence to try driving again.</p>\n<p>maybe you could tackle a smaller, but scary thing first too? Build your confidence.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "128534", "thread_id": "16784", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacksWhileDriving_16784/" }, { "author": "blitheSun94", "content": "<p>Thank you, that's really good advice. Loud sounds sometimes trigger me so that makes sense. I'm a generally great driver, never been in an accident and I have no qualms about moving over to the slow lane. Driving next to the wall irks me tremendously, but I don't think that's unusual...</p>", "parent_ids": [ "128534,nil" ], "post_id": "128651", "thread_id": "16784", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacksWhileDriving_16784/" }, { "author": "wonderfulSound72", "content": "<p>Hi there! I think that one of the most important things about driving is that you are comfortable doing it. If you aren't, then don't feel bad about not getting your license or driving. Your mental state of mind is much more important than anything else.</p>\n<p>Have you tried taking deep, calming breaths before you get behind the wheel? Reciting a positive mantra \"I can do it... I am capable... etc\" might help, as well.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "128566", "thread_id": "16784", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacksWhileDriving_16784/" }, { "author": "blitheSun94", "content": "<p>Yes, this is true. I forget sometimes because my husband has a proclivity to road rage so I usually offer to drive. I'll keep better tabs on my inventory moving forward. Thank you!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "128566,nil" ], "post_id": "128652", "thread_id": "16784", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacksWhileDriving_16784/" }, { "author": "SingleDad", "content": "<p>This sure sounds familiar! I started getting attacks while driving last summer. Now it's so bad that I do all my errands late at night or really early in the morning to avoid other drivers. I used to love driving now it's just another chore. I was prescribedsome meds, an antihistamine actually,to help but I have to take it before I get behind the wheel.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "136890", "thread_id": "16784", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacksWhileDriving_16784/" }, { "author": "charmingZebra76", "content": "<p>Driving is a huge trigger for my panic attacks, too. GPS and mellow music are godsends. Singing along to the radio helps me, too, even if I don't like the song, because it forces me to breathe.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "141901", "thread_id": "16784", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacksWhileDriving_16784/" }, { "author": "blitheSun94", "content": "<p>Mhm, music is key! I am an avid metal fan but while I'm drinking I kindly switch the classical as it helps me maintain a sense of calm. Plus, I do so actually enjoy it. :) Anyone else here find relief through classical music?</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "142259", "thread_id": "16784", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacksWhileDriving_16784/" }, { "author": "blitheSun94", "content": "<p>While I'm driving** (Not drinking, good grief! LOL. We really need an edit feature on this site) :P</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "142260", "thread_id": "16784", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacksWhileDriving_16784/" }, { "author": "Carebear1", "content": "<p>Just remember your not alone.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "142324", "thread_id": "16784", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacksWhileDriving_16784/" }, { "author": "blitheSun94", "content": "<p>Always.</p>\n<p>Thank you.</p>\n<p>From my heart to yours.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "142324,nil" ], "post_id": "142343", "thread_id": "16784", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacksWhileDriving_16784/" } ]

{ "author": "nina50", "content": "Sometimes when I feel my anxiety being to peek I take deep breaths until my breathing is more controlled and even. Once i have significantly calmed down i write about what i was feeling ,why i was feeling it, and turn it into an essay or poem. When i am done i am more relaxed and capable of handling situations that i at first could not face!", "date": "1423046117", "thread_id": "17710", "title": "Coping Skills", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/CopingSkills_17710/" }

[ { "author": "conscientiousLand1511", "content": "<p>Thats actually a really good idea....i may use it myself! Thank u and it is good to know that it helps u out as well :)\n</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "139063", "thread_id": "17710", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/CopingSkills_17710/" }, { "author": "electricLove3", "content": "<p>I really like that idea of converting your thoughts and feelings into a poem! I sometimes like to journal afterwards, but it doesn't always feel as satisfying to be just jotting down my feelings (especially after having just been of whelmed by those same thoughts/emotions moments before). Creating a poem or story would really help with being creative and turning a frustrating experience into an art form. Thanks for the great tip!!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "139136", "thread_id": "17710", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/CopingSkills_17710/" }, { "author": "straightforwardPenny802", "content": "<p>something that works for me is to focus on what is happening with my five sense. For some reason focusing on the things I can hear, see, feel and smell brings me back into my body and I don't get as anxious about feeling anxious.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "140452", "thread_id": "17710", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/CopingSkills_17710/" }, { "author": "Ayena", "content": "<p>I'm going to try all of your techniques and see if they can help me with my horrible case of speech anxiety. The most simplesituation like talkingin class, singing when someone is near, or even sharing my opinion will triggerit. Whenit hits, my whole body shakes and trembles badly, my knees get weak, my heart races, I feel faint as I take shallow breaths, and the whole room, Except forthe face of the person that is talking to me, blurs and fades to black. I really hope it works because it's my dream to sing, music is my life.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "140492", "thread_id": "17710", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/CopingSkills_17710/" }, { "author": "OnwardAndUpward", "content": "<p>I have a few things that I use to cope, which depend on the situation I am in. If I can, I like to go fora walk, especially in nature. I find feeling connected with the outdoors really helps me see the big picture and relax. I also find that journaling really helps. Getting all of my emotions and thoughts on paper help me feel more objective to my situation and I can gather myself more easily. If it is something that I have to deal with in the moment, I take three deep breaths and I let myself feel and accept my anxiety for those three breaths, and with each breath I try to let a bit more of it go. By the end of the three breaths I feel at least calm enough to deal with the immediate situation. Of course, no one is perfect and I am not able to do these things every time, but I find that generally they really help me!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "141265", "thread_id": "17710", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/CopingSkills_17710/" }, { "author": "Ayena", "content": "<p>That sounds like a good idea. I'm going to try and share my results😊😊</p>", "parent_ids": [ "141265,nil" ], "post_id": "141301", "thread_id": "17710", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/CopingSkills_17710/" }, { "author": "OnwardAndUpward", "content": "<p>That sounds great! Best of luck, I look forward to hearing how it goes.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "141301,141265,nil" ], "post_id": "141323", "thread_id": "17710", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/CopingSkills_17710/" }, { "author": "ambivertigo", "content": "<p>This is already a great thread - thank you for starting it. I want to share that I recently discovered the Calm app (also known as www.calm.com, I think) and I'm finding the daily guided meditation sessions really helpful. I recommend it esp if you're an overanxious / analytical thinker like me. I'm learning how to be more present and in tune with myself and just BREATHE. Sounds so silly and simple but I get so wrapped up in my cyclical thoughts, I don't even realize it. So that is my coping mechanism of the moment :)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "141338", "thread_id": "17710", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/CopingSkills_17710/" }, { "author": "Shina22", "content": "<p>Write. Write. Write. Don't worry about grammatical errors. Make it sloppy. Draw whatever comes to mind. Take time to yourself. Breathe. Look at the sunset. Talk to someone. Breathe.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "141344", "thread_id": "17710", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/CopingSkills_17710/" }, { "author": "Takecareruby", "content": "<p>A lot of times, I feel that helping people, whether it be friends or strangers helps me feel good about myself because I'll feel that I can make other people happy whenever they need someone. I don't know, it brings a spark in me that gives me the incentive to be stronger because other people need me or the helping hand. A lot of my friends have come to me for the sake of asking for advice and I help out to a fault. And although it can sometimes be a bit risky to help someone who's in serious pain...I find comfort in knowing I can be somebody's rock.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "141349", "thread_id": "17710", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/CopingSkills_17710/" } ]

{ "author": "Flubjounce", "content": "I've been dealing with social anxiety since I was a little kid. At first, everyone just assumed I was an introvert, and that I just liked to keep to myself. But as time went on, I just kept avoiding social situations more and more until it was obvious something was wrong. Now I've been working towards overcoming it, but it is a lot harder that I'd anticipated. Instead of getting used to socializing with others, the more I do it, the more I confirm for myself that I don't like it. Its like you're at an amusement park with your friends, and there is a ride you really don't want to go on, but your friends are pressuring you to ride it. They eventually convince you, but the ride is just as bad, if not worse than you thought it would be, and afterwards you realize you were right all along, and you never want to ride it again. So how can I get past social anxiety if I can't get used to social situations?\n", "date": "1422221415", "thread_id": "17039", "title": "How can you overcome social anxiety?", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Howcanyouovercomesocialanxiety_17039/" }

[ { "author": "adventurousZebra78", "content": "<p>Hey im the same way and i think that people dont accept you if your shy they judge you more I dont think I will ever overcome my anxiety issues because of everything that I been through but I accept it but others cant some understand and others dont get it most people seem.so free im not even free just trapped I hope you can overcome it just keep practcing😔💜</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "131842", "thread_id": "17039", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Howcanyouovercomesocialanxiety_17039/" }, { "author": "funnyStrings6840", "content": "<p>I suffer from social anxiety as well and it is so hard for me to do anything but exposure although uncomfortable is the only way to ease it a bit, at least to be able to go to a store our something outside the house. I work on it all the time , you keep trying and things will get better for you. Take care. </p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "131959", "thread_id": "17039", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Howcanyouovercomesocialanxiety_17039/" }, { "author": "Roadie", "content": "<p>Hi there, everyone</p>\n<p>I can't tell you that I have the solution for your social anxiety even though I wish I did. What I can do is share the story of my battle with social anxiety.</p>\n<p>I also struggled with social anxiety from a young age. I struggled with the fears of what other people thought of me. I made preconceptions of what they thought of me - of which they were all negative. I concentrated on negative thoughts to \"prepare myself on the offchance that they actually were thinking negatively of me\". I had the automatic thoughts that were so out of control. And I avoided every social situation that I could, whether it was a big social occasion or being in the workplace kitchenette with one other person.</p>\n<p>I lived it all.</p>\n<p>It can be managed however and when you do begin to manage it, those negative thoughts start to disappear. The automatic thoughts stop. And things do change for the better.</p>\n<p>I began my journey back in September of 2014 and am proud to say that I manage my social anxiety effectively now. My choice of words there was quite deliberate. I do not believe that social anxiety is something that can be cured, but you can control how you think and respond to situations, which makes your anxiety more manageable :)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "134433", "thread_id": "17039", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Howcanyouovercomesocialanxiety_17039/" }, { "author": "girl3132", "content": "<p>I've been told that I need to do everything that I feel I can't doto overcome social anxiety. I've done many of these things many times through the years, including some that are very hard for us.But after all of the efforts, successes, etc I still feel anxious when an opportunity of socializing appears so I'm not sure of how much exposure actually \"cures\" the thing.<br>This could be something that only happens to me because I have other issues that need to be treated so maybe I'm not a good example. Anyways, it got slightly better but although I know in my mind that everything is alright, I keep getting anxiety. Maybe I need to work on understanding things better or a different way.<br><br>However, exposure helped me get better with a phobia I have with spiders and the anxiety I got here was way worse. Curious.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "140842", "thread_id": "17039", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Howcanyouovercomesocialanxiety_17039/" }, { "author": "Roadie", "content": "<p>hi there @girl3132</p>\n<p>​you are right and inquestioning whether there is a miraculouscure for social anxiety.the goal in my eyesis to be able to manage it at the end of the day. if you achieve that thing you have done well or are doing well</p>", "parent_ids": [ "140842,nil" ], "post_id": "140982", "thread_id": "17039", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Howcanyouovercomesocialanxiety_17039/" } ]

{ "author": "GoldenWorld", "content": "Hello everyone,\n\nI came across this really interesting article and wanted to share it with you guys. If you want to skip the reading here is the abstract\n\n\"A study [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/22120444] published in 2011 showed that individuals with social phobias are hypersensitive to other people’s states of mind. It means that they can easily perceive and accurately distinguish feelings of those around them, which basically makes them empaths, or people capable of feeling and sharing the emotions of others.\"\n\nSource: Here [http://themindunleashed.org/2015/01/social-anxiety-may-associated-empath.html]\n\nDo you guys agree or disagree?\n\n \n", "date": "1423232808", "thread_id": "17823", "title": "Study: Social Anxiety is Associated with Being an Empath", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/StudySocialAnxietyisAssociatedwithBeinganEmpath_17823/" }

[ { "author": "conscientiousWheel1989", "content": "<p>I really enjoyed this. I myself am an empath and it's a curse and blessing all wrapped in one. But the good outweighs the bad.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "140749", "thread_id": "17823", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/StudySocialAnxietyisAssociatedwithBeinganEmpath_17823/" }, { "author": "Cadence", "content": "<p>I think it's natural to be a little bit anxious around people as an empath. I mean, if you can essentially care about someone you don't really know to the point of feeling their pain, or happiness... It'd be kind of easy to be worried that any given person is going to rub off on you. I like the article, I think it raises a lot of valid points. Thank you for sharing!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "140789", "thread_id": "17823", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/StudySocialAnxietyisAssociatedwithBeinganEmpath_17823/" }, { "author": "GoldenWorld", "content": "<p>I agree @conscientiousWheel1989 and @Cadence.</p>\n<p>I think training in being more mindful would help in both cases of beign an empath or/and actually having phobias such as \"fear of being judged\" by helping onetake on less of other's emotions upon one's self and getting a more accurate picture others emotions.</p>\n<p>However this requires a conscious effort, training and practice as well as support.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "140841", "thread_id": "17823", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/StudySocialAnxietyisAssociatedwithBeinganEmpath_17823/" }, { "author": "quietquestions", "content": "<p>This is sort of related but I once read a study about how neglected children and children of divorced parents tend to be more spatially aware of where people are. </p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "140861", "thread_id": "17823", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/StudySocialAnxietyisAssociatedwithBeinganEmpath_17823/" } ]

{ "author": "missld5", "content": "I find it very difficult speaking in front of groups especially with people i dont know very well and especially guys. I find in class I havent got the courage to speak up or voice my opinion, Im terrified of feeling embarrassed or what people will think of me if i speak. Im also afraid if I say something that makes no sense or sounds stupid. Im looking for tips on how to overcome this anxiety. I want to have the courage to speak up and give my opinion and to also not be afraid!\n", "date": "1422910166", "thread_id": "17553", "title": "Cant find my voice", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Cantfindmyvoice_17553/" }

[ { "author": "electricLove3", "content": "<p>Hey there! I am the same way. It is so hard for me to string a few sentences together sometimes when I am talking with coworkers or strangers. I am getting better at it (slowly but surely), and I think the biggest factor in overcoming my social anxiety hurdles is exposure. Recently, I have just been trying to put myself in little situations where I have brief exchanges that don't feel too overwhelming. I may stumble over my words a bit, but I have been trying to be kinder to myself when I do and give myself credit for putting myself out there. Progress is progress, no matter how small. :)</p>\n<p>My natural defense mechanism is to just give in to the anxiety and avoid the situations, but it only make my anxiety more intense. I think once we get more comfortable talking in lower pressure scenarios, it might get a bit easier to participate in class or give a quick presentation.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "137801", "thread_id": "17553", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Cantfindmyvoice_17553/" }, { "author": "giggleHoney76", "content": "<p>Have you considered looking into Toastmasters International&gt; I think what you're describing is exactly their forte.</p>\n<p>From what I understand, there's no fee to attend a local meeting as a guest to see what it's about and whether it's what the person wants. Membership information is on their web site.</p>\n<p>http://www.toastmasters.org/</p>\n<p>Good luck with your training,</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "137835", "thread_id": "17553", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Cantfindmyvoice_17553/" } ]

{ "author": "Danielle20", "content": "I have just recently started having panic attacks, and I am having them all the time. Sometimes there are reasons I have them others they come on really unexpected. My parents don think anxiety exists so I cant talk to them. I don't know what to do?\n", "date": "1422245921", "thread_id": "17072", "title": "They are happening often", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Theyarehappeningoften_17072/" }

[ { "author": "SingleDad", "content": "<p>Hi Danielle. Sorry to hear your parents are not supporting you in diagnosing your stress. My son had his health affected by stress last year in third grade so it's not just a grown up thing. ;) Here is a link to share with your folks that might get them thinking. Good luck and remember we are here for you at 7 Cups of Tea!</p>\n<p>http://childparenting.about.com/od/healthsafety/a/how_to_spot_anxiety_and_stress_in_children.htm</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "136888", "thread_id": "17072", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Theyarehappeningoften_17072/" }, { "author": "limegreenapple99", "content": "<p>first off, you're not alone. I get panick attacks almost every month. I didn't tell my parents due to fear of them over reacting but it's good you're telling yours. if your parents aren't listening go to a school counselor they'll be able to talk to your parents for you &amp; get you help. if you don't feel comfortable with a counselor go to a close friends parents &amp; see if they'll be willing to talk to your parents for you. I hope this helps :) if you need anything else feel free to contact me.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "136888,nil" ], "post_id": "136911", "thread_id": "17072", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Theyarehappeningoften_17072/" } ]

{ "author": "tarfiesparkles", "content": "Hi, this is really weird for me because I've never really publicly talked about my anxiety before. I've never talked to my parents, sister, or anyone about it. To be perfectly honest, I'm even kind of scared to start a chat with a listener on this website because having a immediate back-and-forth with someone about my issues kind of freaks me out for some reason. \n\nI'm a college student going to a school far away from home, so as far as my family knows I'm doing 100% ok because they're not around. Academically I'm doing fine and it isn't my first year here so I've made some friends. I've always been shy and have gotten anxious around people I don't know well so my first year here I forced myself to do some things that I probably normally wouldn't have because I didn't want to be stranded far from home without any friends. I actually ended up joining a sorority, which has been going ok, even leading me to meet some other people I would call my friends. But this year I feel as though things have taken a turn for the worse. My friends within my sorority have left to study abroad and I feel like there is no one I can really talk to. Classes were hard last semester so I kind of didn't take part in as many sorority activities, so I haven't been around much. I live in the sorority house and it honestly just makes me feel terrible because I don't feel comfortable around anyone and my anxiety stops me from doing lots of things. I don't even join everyone to eat meals because I just feel so uncomfortable even going downstairs to interact with everyone while eating, so I typically stay in my (single) room. My closest friends I've made here are not in this sorority and live across campus, so even escaping to go see them is something that happens infrequently. I really just don't like going out and drinking all that much unless it's with people I feel very safe and comfortable with, which seems to be the main social bonding activity with the girls in my sorority and I can't bring myself to go out with any of them. I feel like my withdrawn behavior has sort of given me a reputation as being anti-social and weird, making it more difficult for me to approach people. It's really been making feel worse lately.\n\nSo yeah. Not really sure what kind of help I'm seeking,  but I just really needed to get that off my chest.\n", "date": "1422833506", "thread_id": "17517", "title": "Social Anxiety/Feeling Worse ", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/SocialAnxietyFeelingWorse_17517/" }

[ { "author": "justanothersomeone", "content": "<p>My social anxiety its just getting worse every day, I feel like everyone its going to hurt me, that I can't trust anyone and that if I tell anyone something they'll tell everyone and laugh at me.. </p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "136853", "thread_id": "17517", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/SocialAnxietyFeelingWorse_17517/" }, { "author": "DA996", "content": "<p>Private chat? I can help\n</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "136877", "thread_id": "17517", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/SocialAnxietyFeelingWorse_17517/" } ]

{ "author": "fernandezmorgan1992", "content": "I have social anxiety and a fear of public speaking. I can't relax and go slow when speaking so I stutter. There's days when it's not that bad and then there are times when it's horrible. I get made fun of and I'm embarrassed now. I don't think it's nice to make fun of something I can't control. \n", "date": "1422656545", "thread_id": "17451", "title": "Embarrassed ", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Embarrassed_17451/" }

[ { "author": "SoaringSky", "content": "<p>Social Anxiety is really hard to deal with, it understandable that days fluctuates from good to bad. I'm proud of you for getting up there in the first place, even if nothing comes out, it takes a lot to even have the intent.</p>\n<p>I also agree that no one should laugh at someone for something they have no control over, but unfortunately there are people like that in our society, though I hope none on this website! :)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "135472", "thread_id": "17451", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Embarrassed_17451/" }, { "author": "courageousCranberry", "content": "<p>I suffer from severe public speaking anxiety too. It used to be so bad that I would literally shake when i'm in front of everyone, so I can relate to how you feel. You are very brave for having spoken in front of a group of people at all. I know that it can be hurtful and hard when people make fun of you, but don't let them get to you. There are some things I do that helps me loads with reducing my anxiety when speaking in front of a big group. I always rehearse my text the night before, make notes in small cards to help if I freeze, and I also constantly remind myself to speak loud and clear a few minutes before I start speaking. I know it can be superficial, but faking confidence is key to actual confidence. If you are scared try making eye contact with 2 or 3 people spread evenlyin the crowd and continue talking to only this people.</p>\n<p>You have nothing to be embarrassed about, know that you are not alone. :) Stay strong!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "135946", "thread_id": "17451", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Embarrassed_17451/" }, { "author": "EverlastingLove96", "content": "<p>I know how you feel. I have to practice over and over again before I do something and then I still get nervous. I just choose something to focus on while I am speaking and it keeps me calmer.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "136642", "thread_id": "17451", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Embarrassed_17451/" } ]

{ "author": "wittyWillow5099", "content": "And we're having a housewarming party for a new  house we just moved into. Im still trying to acklimate myself to the move and new surroundings and now to have a house full of people. Luckily they are all friends and know of my MIs so I dont have to wear the \"mask\" around them. I just hope we all have fun.\n", "date": "1422546877", "thread_id": "17396", "title": "Social Anxiety", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/SocialAnxiety_17396/" }

[ { "author": "giggleHoney76", "content": "<p>Having a lot of people around at the same time can actually be a relief from social anxiety. You're not forced into a one on one connection, which could be awkward. Also, brief hellos and how are yous and then on to the next person to greet is to be expected. Just don't be rude about it or make the person feel unwelcome.</p>\n<p></p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "134623", "thread_id": "17396", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/SocialAnxiety_17396/" }, { "author": "easyTortoise20", "content": "<p><strong>It sounds as though you have a great outlook on your anxiety. You will do well.</strong></p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "134830", "thread_id": "17396", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/SocialAnxiety_17396/" } ]

{ "author": "fernandezmorgan1992", "content": "I understand being shy around people I don't know but I get nervous and socially anxious right before hanging out with people I do know. I don't know how to overcome it. \n", "date": "1422262683", "thread_id": "17083", "title": "Complicated Girl", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/ComplicatedGirl_17083/" }

[ { "author": "politeCherry702", "content": "<p>hi , firstly iam the same way as u are.i feel very shy andfear, when i got with friends. They make lot of fun ,but i always prefer to sit back and laugh at their jokes .even when i have a joke to crack i never (0 times) put my joke forward and when new members join in my heart rate used to be at peaks .i thought may be i was thinking of spoiling my name that was good and dont hurt any one.</p>\n<p>what i did is</p>\n<p>i studies frnds, who are going to be with me at worse? who will never leave me ? and who is going to understand me? i picked 2 . i shared with them everything that is in my brain. Normally best frnds will always be with u. so i started free with them going to their home frequently,throwing parties, cracking dirty jokes ,and looking at beautiful girls,silly night calls ,many more. choose carefully those who dont judge you. then after i became expertised , that i can easily have fun in a group.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "132152", "thread_id": "17083", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/ComplicatedGirl_17083/" }, { "author": "eviesweet", "content": "<p>Anxiety is a fear of the future. Social anxiety is, sometimes, an irrational fear we can't control. But we can turn it around. With small steps you can face it. Think: is there a reason to be anxious about? If you have anxiety around people you know this is what you should do: deep breaths and say something that you think others will find interesting. Go out with them, show yourself they're your friends and show your mind you have no reason to fear something like that. Same with family. If they make you nervous and anxious, try to fight the anxiety. Use your rational mind: what worse can happen if i do say something or act? Will the world stop turning? Will you die? Will someone die? Face your anxiety, when it tells you \"no\" say \"hell yeah!\" and jump head first. It will be hard at first but after you seeing there's nothing to be worried about, it becomes easier.</p>\n<p>What helped me was going out with friends, sharing my thoughts to one person I trusted a lot and when I felt anxious I just had to tell her, she'd say \"we're going for a walk\" and see why I was anxious and guarantee me I was safe, while away from the group to not make a scene. Telling someone, like a parent or friend will make it easier. Pick one you trust the most and tell them. It will show you trust them, and in a majority they will help you.</p>\n<p>Other than that, do this exercise: Inhale 1, 2, 3, 4 hold for 1, 2, exhale 1, 2, 3, 4, hold for 1, 2. It helped me a lot before saying something in my group of friends.</p>\n<p>Going to an activity with friends or family, like dance, sports, art etc can give you something to talk about, somewhere to go and clean your head out of fears and anxieties and give you techniques and coping systems for when you feel more anxious.</p>\n<p>Sorry for the long talk, probably said nothing new or helped, but i'm just sharing my personal experience. Going to dance with my best friend, reading and going to book stores with her was what made me be able to talk to her more than with my other friends. Social anxiety it hard to overcome - but with time, support and coping mechanisms, it becomes something easier.</p>\n<p>Good luck!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "132178", "thread_id": "17083", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/ComplicatedGirl_17083/" }, { "author": "bestApple51", "content": "<p>I think my social anxiety is something I will always have to combat, but I have improved a lot with cognitive behavioral therapy. For me, I have to recognize that I have a dysfunctional thought process. I don't know what thoughts are irrational or rational sometimes, but I have learned not to listen to negative thoughts as much and to confide in others to verify my irrationality. I also have to ask myself what emotional responses are healthy and have developed a more positive outlook in the past few years. Social anxiety is often rooted in shame for me, and shame is never an emotion to dwell on so I rationalize when shame isn't appropriate and try to let go. It's a constant process and some days are harder than others, but I have gotten stronger through it.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "132745", "thread_id": "17083", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/ComplicatedGirl_17083/" } ]

{ "author": "MariBotas", "content": "I am in college, and 1-2 years older then my peers, and to top it off I'm a transfer student. I've managed to strike up a conversation with a few people at the end one of my classes last year and participate with people in the class rather than the professor. Everyone was shocked that I wasn't super uptight! It felt really good to connect with people, but now it's a new sememster with new classes and I feel like I'm back to square one. In both class I know people from previous classes, but I couldn't work up the courage to sit next to any of them.\n\nThese classes are much smaller and will invovle a lot of group work, so I really want to get along with everyone but I feel so awkward trying to start conversations in class! I feel like I'm so isolated from the rest of my classmates who have friends to talk to during lulls in the class. I am so frustrated with myself, I came into last class earlier with the intent of sitting down and speaking to someone but chickened out and sat alone again.\n\nI also want to get better at communicating with people in my groups, because I know I end up doing a lot of extra work simply because I felt too anxious to properly communicate with them about dividing the project and meeting with them to work on it. One class is just 7 people and I feel so isolated since many of them are already friends or aquaintences. I do know one girl and she's nice, and I did work up the courage to sit next to her, I just am at a loss as to how to start up a conversation. I just feel so scared that I might say something that will make them think I'm dumb, weird, or clingy. Once I get started talking, I'm so anxious that I talk a lot and really fast...and I fear that will make people not want to talk to me again.\n\nAny advice is greatly appreciated!\n", "date": "1422176953", "thread_id": "17022", "title": "How to engage with people in class/feel more comfortable working in groups", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Howtoengagewithpeopleinclassfeelmorecomfortableworkingingroups_17022/" }

[ { "author": "CompassionateHeart2", "content": "<p>I can relate to you perfectly, but with time I learned to eventually work up the courage it takes to talk to someone. You might be surprised that people are willing to actually talk to you even if you're 'awkward' just by starting any conversation with them, being nice, and even saying random things. The easiest thing you can do is sit next to someone else who is alone at the moment and just start talking to them about the class. Ask them what they think so far and how it's going for them, etc. Especially if you already know someone in the class even a little this approach should be easier. Let things flow from there and you'll see it's not that hard after all. Just try to relax and not think about it too much, after all they are human too and you never know if they might feel the same way or felt like that at some point in their lives. Best of luck! :)</p>\n<p></p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "131575", "thread_id": "17022", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Howtoengagewithpeopleinclassfeelmorecomfortableworkingingroups_17022/" } ]

{ "author": "littleBIGrobot", "content": "This doesn't happen often, but it foes occasionally. I go through a time when my depression gets worse and I avoid everyone in my life as much as possible. Is this social anxiety? I've read a bit about it but it's not exactly the same and I'm not always like this. I know I avoid people, and can get very uncomfortable in social situations, but it feels way too irrational. I feel as if I'm not me, I'm not doing what I want to do, and I'm not saying things I want to say. I feel like I'd rather be alone, by myself but I know it's not right. How do I stop it? Sometimes drugs help, but they are only temporary, and cost money. Sometimes I want to fix it, but it just feels like too much work and I'd rather sit alone in my room doing nothing until it passes, but then I'm afraid it never will and I'll die there sad and alone...", "date": "1419541356", "thread_id": "15305", "title": "withdrawing from everyone", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/withdrawingfromeveryone_15305/" }

[ { "author": "Kristynsmama", "content": "<p>Social anxiety and isolation as a result of depression are two very different things. If it comes in waves, and you are able to get back to a normal social life after a period of time, chances are it's a result of depression and perhaps some generalized anxiety. If in doubt, I would check in with a dr for a proper diagnosis and treatment. </p>\n<p>Angel</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "117448", "thread_id": "15305", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/withdrawingfromeveryone_15305/" }, { "author": "ZooBombBird97215", "content": "<p>I can really relate. I feel like social anxiety and anxiety in general can co-exist with depression. Both can make you want to withdraw and limit interactions with friends and loved ones.<br><br>This is something I am struggling with. I feel like I am letting my friends and family down and am punishing them. Its not fair to them and they are hurt by this behaviour. There is no easy answer. I do desperately wish they understood a little more and wouldn't take it so personally, although I can completely understand. We are social creatures at heart.<br><br><br>I will post more later on my feelings about this, I have alot to say.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "131447", "thread_id": "15305", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/withdrawingfromeveryone_15305/" } ]

{ "author": "Ryunohane", "content": "Honestly, when I first started going to Kendo class I didn't talk to anyone unless a question was directly asked. It's been a year and now I still don't talk to anyone, except for saying 'hi'. Usually they reply 'Hi' as well and we stop talking there. \n\nI tried complimenting this guy's glasses once in order to start a conversation and he looked at me weirdly. I honestly don't know how to deal with people and every time I try to make a statement or ask a question, it sounds pointless and like I'm forcing it. What do you guys talk about? \n", "date": "1420296816", "thread_id": "15748", "title": "How do you start conversations with people you don't know?", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Howdoyoustartconversationswithpeopleyoudontknow_15748/" }

[ { "author": "reliableJackfruit13", "content": "<p>Hey once I went through the same thing, in class you could ask someone to help you with something, or to explain you something you didn't understand. If you get at least one friend you'll be perfectly fine cause usually friends hang around in \"groups\" and you'll be able to hang with them. But it's harder than it sounds, you have to try again and again and be brave. I hope this helped, good luck :) </p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "117419", "thread_id": "15748", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Howdoyoustartconversationswithpeopleyoudontknow_15748/" }, { "author": "Ryunohane", "content": "<p>Ah, yes. That sounds like a plan to try out. Thanks for the reply, it helped! :D</p>", "parent_ids": [ "117419,nil" ], "post_id": "118017", "thread_id": "15748", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Howdoyoustartconversationswithpeopleyoudontknow_15748/" }, { "author": "Kristynsmama", "content": "<p>One thing I've done in a group setting is say, \"Hey, my name is _______________. I've been coming here for a while now and I really want to get to know people better. If I really knew you, what would I know about you.\" And once they answer, then you answer the same question. You will get a puzzled look, but it will create a connection!</p>\n<p>Angel</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "117444", "thread_id": "15748", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Howdoyoustartconversationswithpeopleyoudontknow_15748/" }, { "author": "Ryunohane", "content": "<p>I'll see what I can do with that and the puzzled look that comes with it c: Thanks for your help!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "117444,nil" ], "post_id": "118018", "thread_id": "15748", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Howdoyoustartconversationswithpeopleyoudontknow_15748/" }, { "author": "QuickJazz", "content": "<p>Firstly, congratulations on your progress,@Ryunohane! From only speaking when spoken to, to occasionally starting conversations. Social anxiety can make even the briefest of social interactionsso hard for us to doat times, so I think it's great that you'reeven talking to them as you are now (even if it's mostly just a case of saying Hi)!</p>\n<p>You all have something in common - Kendo. So perhaps this could be used asyour first stepof building a relationship. AsJackfruitsaid, you could do this by asking questions about technique and other related things. If you've done this before, back-tracking to those conversations and expanding on them can be useful too.</p>\n<p>Then if they mention something you could ask questions or talk more about, you could try to do soin order to find ways to expand on that. You may even want to speak about yourself a little too, in order to work your way to finding more common ground/mutual interests.</p>\n<p>For example:\"You said you've been doingkendofor two years now, was it? How did you get started with it? [Their answer]. Oh, I see. That's interesting! So what kept you going with it too? [Their answer]. Ah, yeah. My experience was (similar/different)in [this way], although I also like [this hobby/interest] too. I think that andkendoare probably the two things I enjoy the most. [Room for them to ask a question and continue]\".</p>\n<p>It might also be worthidentifying things you would like to speak to others about, so that you can try tobring those things up. If people are speaking together, perhaps try to join in too if there's a way you can jump into it.</p>\n<p>But your question is a difficult one to answer! If I'm quite honest, I am only describing things I have tried and benefited frommyself. So you might find yourself trying many waysto build these relationships and other things that work for you instead.</p>\n<p>I'd also like to bring up that,even if it were clear that you were trying hard to interact with them more,is that a bad thing? I think for many people, if not most, it's not easy to get past the first hurdle of getting to know somebody! (I think one reason for this may be becausenot many people seem to like ice-breakers or'small talk', which is sadly really all you can do most of the time with people you don't knowwell!). Awkwardness, dead-ends of topics, silences, etc, can and often dohappen along the way, but - asJackfruitsaid - the trick is to keep trying as you seem to be doingnow.</p>\n<p>In addition, I often think that...when others are not receptive and even give dead-end answers orweird looks, itcan be due to their own reasons (incl. anxieties or shyness) rather than anything against the person trying to strike up a conversation with them. This may not be relevant to your example, butI hope remembering this sometimes may help nonetheless!</p>\n<p>Sorry for writing so much! But I hope that directly or indirectly, this has given you some ideas.</p>\n<p>All in all, I really hope you are able to see progress in your relationships with others,and hopefullyalsofeel an increase in your confidence as a result soon.Happy chatting!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "117491", "thread_id": "15748", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Howdoyoustartconversationswithpeopleyoudontknow_15748/" }, { "author": "Ryunohane", "content": "<p>Whoa, thanks for your detailed reply! I'll try out the things you mentioned. Ugh, I'm one of those dead end answer criminals sometimes XD Another thing to work on I guess... Thanks again, it really helped!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "117491,nil" ], "post_id": "118020", "thread_id": "15748", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Howdoyoustartconversationswithpeopleyoudontknow_15748/" }, { "author": "QuickJazz", "content": "<p>No problem, anytime! I hope that starting conversations will get easier as you practise more and more,@Ryunohane!</p>\n<p>Ha ha, yeah, I'm exactly the same. Sometimes I'll be on a roll~ with my dead-end answers, even if I don't mean to be and actuallywant to continue the conversations.But I know that, for me, it's just my nerves causing me to struggle a bit, so I work on calming myself down and turning the awkward silences into moments of brief meditation/mindfulness instead (making sure to un-tense my body, easing any racing thoughts, etc).</p>", "parent_ids": [ "118020,117491,nil" ], "post_id": "118033", "thread_id": "15748", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Howdoyoustartconversationswithpeopleyoudontknow_15748/" }, { "author": "Jam345", "content": "<p>Say hi and you could ask how he/she isdoing. Then you could exchange questions and answers. Just be yourself while talking andtry to figure out what he/she is most interested with, then you could have a great conversation.<br>And one more thing, be careful on bringing up a joke, be sure it's funny. haha :D</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "130853", "thread_id": "15748", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Howdoyoustartconversationswithpeopleyoudontknow_15748/" } ]

{ "author": "BrieflyBri9", "content": "Hi I'm Bri. I've been dealing with social anxiety for a while, and it fluctuates between getting better and getting worse. I don't really like talking about it with other people, because it feels like I'm burdening them with my problems, which is a dumb way of thinking I guess. I'm starting to miss out on things because of my anxiety. I'm missing out on new possible friends because I can't talk to anybody, and I'm missing out on existing friendships because I can't connect with them. Most of all, I'm missing on cool opportunities because I don't feel comfortable joining in them. There's the cool program at my school that combines a few classes so you have room to do an internship. It's an awesome opportunity, especially since I want to go into medicine. But at the end of the program the student has to give a 20 minute presentation in front of the class, and I'm considering missing out on this awesome program simply because I don't think I'll be able to handle doing that presentation. Anyone have any tips on how to get rid of anxiety, or at least minimize? I'm so sick of feeling anxious...\n", "date": "1421192248", "thread_id": "16438", "title": "Missing opportunities because of anxiety.", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Missingopportunitiesbecauseofanxiety_16438/" }

[ { "author": "bestApple51", "content": "<p>First, look into your school's disability services and see what they can do for you. Anxiety is a disability and they can make accommodations. As far as the presentation goes, I would try to do it but communicate your disability to the instructors. I think confronting the problem is the best bet because in order to learn how to handle anxiety, you have to put yourself in the uncomfortable position. A presentation is where social anxiety meets performance anxiety. I am a musician and performing has always been an issue for me. After years, I don't shake like I used to and the anxiety isn't apparent to others. Sometimes, I still have panic attacks or pause to take a pill in the middle of a lesson, but I have come a long way. You can practice a presentation and perform it for others to get more comfortable, but it helps to perceive the entire experience as an opportunity to combat your fears.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "128543", "thread_id": "16438", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Missingopportunitiesbecauseofanxiety_16438/" }, { "author": "americangirldoll", "content": "<p>I can't seem to relax. I worry about life all the time. I just want peace.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "128575", "thread_id": "16438", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Missingopportunitiesbecauseofanxiety_16438/" }, { "author": "None", "content": "<p>Sometimes i wake up in the middle of the night..i cant move because of fear. It is so strong that i wanna scream. I wanna runaway...from bed...house...city...word...but from the other hand i am so paralized with fear that i cant even move and feel safe just in bed. Idk why. This part of my anxiety is the strongest one. Sometimes i am so afraid of this fear which wakes me up in the middle of the night or in the morning that i am afraid of falling asleep. I can stay up even 3days\n</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "128581", "thread_id": "16438", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Missingopportunitiesbecauseofanxiety_16438/" }, { "author": "PurpleSquirrel", "content": "<p>HiBri. I've had panic disorder for years and know your internal struggle to achieve great things whilethe claws of anxiety pull you back. The best thing that helped me in situations like the one you are facing is visualization. It sounds overly simple, butyou have to try it. Find an alone place where you can talk to yourself and quietlyspeak out the event.</p>\n<p>The morning of the presentation, I'll get off the bus and...</p>\n<p>hen I get to the classroom, I'll take my seat next to ___ who will be wearingthose same pink sneakers she always wears...</p>\n<p>I will listen to others present and write down one quote I liked from each if them (me personally, I count \"uh\" and \"um\")</p>\n<p>When myname is called, I will walk tothe front of the room and see the big tree out the window...</p>\n<p></p>\n<p>Be as descriptive as you can and experience the anxiety in a safe</p>\n<p></p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "128740", "thread_id": "16438", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Missingopportunitiesbecauseofanxiety_16438/" }, { "author": "PurpleSquirrel", "content": "<p>... Place.</p>\n<p>ryto notice theplaces where you have the most anxiety so you can be ready for them.</p>\n<p></p>", "parent_ids": [ "128740,nil" ], "post_id": "128741", "thread_id": "16438", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Missingopportunitiesbecauseofanxiety_16438/" } ]

{ "author": "Laura", "content": "Share here. \n", "date": "1418245400", "thread_id": "11198", "title": "How can I bring myself down once I have started to have a Panic Attack?", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/HowcanIbringmyselfdownonceIhavestartedtohaveaPanicAttack_11198/" }

[ { "author": "slayteralmighty", "content": "<p>One of the ways I calm down when I'm having a panic attackis 4x4breathing. It's something taught in the military that they do before a big mission that my conselour told me about. You breath in for 4 second, hold your breath for 4 seconds , and then breath out for 4 seconds. Its suggested that you do this for about 4 minutes but even just one will help.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "106795", "thread_id": "11198", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/HowcanIbringmyselfdownonceIhavestartedtohaveaPanicAttack_11198/" }, { "author": "Jodie43", "content": "<p>Thank you I will follow this advice, dont have many panic attacks but tend to have one when stress about something and confrontations.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "106795,nil" ], "post_id": "114165", "thread_id": "11198", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/HowcanIbringmyselfdownonceIhavestartedtohaveaPanicAttack_11198/" }, { "author": "slayteralmighty", "content": "<p>No problem, It seems to help me also I'll listen to some calm music while doing it and focus on the breathing and music not the thought in my head</p>", "parent_ids": [ "114165,106795,nil" ], "post_id": "124700", "thread_id": "11198", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/HowcanIbringmyselfdownonceIhavestartedtohaveaPanicAttack_11198/" }, { "author": "ssivans", "content": "<p>For me, what helps is focusing on the concrete things all around me. If I'm with a group of people, I'll point out mundane objects, like, \"Look, that man's riding a skateboard\" or \"Look, there's a plane in the sky\" to help calm myself down and focus on something else. This doesn't always help, so sometimes I need to go walk around outside for a few minutes or just sit and focus on breathing.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "115202", "thread_id": "11198", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/HowcanIbringmyselfdownonceIhavestartedtohaveaPanicAttack_11198/" }, { "author": "affableApple63", "content": "<p>Our future is quite unpredictable and makes us curious of what certain to appear in front of our eyes. Sometimes our assumptionscreate fear into us and makes us pessimistic. Usually in a panic attack,Intense thoughts come into mind. We need to ease ourselves and think about greener side of the grass, maybe close our eyes and think about something that makes us peaceful, and ease ourselves with the statement that it's always good to be reflective rather than reactive. For anyone who gets panic attacks or is having one, I hope this post was helpful. :)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "127893", "thread_id": "11198", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/HowcanIbringmyselfdownonceIhavestartedtohaveaPanicAttack_11198/" }, { "author": "PoetaSinVersos", "content": "<p>I've been havingpanickattacks since I was 14. They came along with depression, suicidal thoughts and insomnia. I have a quite good method to overcome them once they have started, but it may not work for you - keep that in mind!</p>\n<p></p>\n<p>When I'm having apanickattack while in public, I try to find some place to sit. When I'm sit, I focus my gaze into some random spot and then I try counting or singing mentally, or just remember lyrics of a song that makes you happy (I've always liked remembering that line on \"Mr Jones\" -Counting Crows- when he says: Grey is my favourite color, I felt so symbolic yesterday. I found it just silly and kind of funny and the panick attack is over). In the ideal situation I'd have some music to put out loud in my headphones, but sometimes it just can't work or I haven't my mobile or headphones or battery. So: Sit, look indefinite spot and count or sing some songs in your head. Try focusing only on your song, nobody around you, you are all alone and no one can hurt you, no one can judge you.</p>\n<p>Sometimes if I can't find a place to sit or I find that there are many people I focus on their actions while trying to compose some poetry on that. Just rhymes, even if they come out as silly ones. Also I try to remember some films in where I have seen the same action (like: This man is drinkingcoffewith his right hand like it was X actor in X film! that's amazing!).</p>\n<p>If I'm alone or home, I just try lying on bed/couch and listening music out loud.</p>\n<p>Yesterday I tried something my little brother told me worked for him. I was standing in my University, doing a test, and then I felt like I was about to fall into a panick attack. I just stopped being myself and I became one of my favourite character in literature. I tried to think on what he'd do instead of me. Not only I stopped my P.A. but also passed the test. So I'll add \"thinking of you like if you were a fictional character\" in the list. Killing dragons in the street feelsquietuseful.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "128037", "thread_id": "11198", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/HowcanIbringmyselfdownonceIhavestartedtohaveaPanicAttack_11198/" } ]

{ "author": "zoethevampireslayer", "content": "Hi, I'm 22 and have been dealing with anxiety since 17. My partner and I have been together for 4 years but we both come from different countries. I'd like to move to his with him but I'm scared it will trigger a panic attack. I experienced my first panic attacks when in his country. I'm so scared of having a panic attack I can't even go there to try to overcome the situation.. I don't know how to go about this. If anyone has ever moved to another country they may understand and I'd like to talk with you.. thanks for listening.\n", "date": "1421641227", "thread_id": "16731", "title": "The fear of having a panic attack", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Thefearofhavingapanicattack_16731/" }

[ { "author": "RebeccaH", "content": "<p>Hi Zoe,</p>\n<p>It's really common for people with anxiety to worry so much about having panic attacks that they actually cause themselves to have one! I understand that you're feeling panicked in this time of transition. Sometimes our anxiety stops us from doing things that we really want to do. Can you talk to your boyfriend about your fears? He may be able to help you answer some of the questions that are likely swimming around in your mind.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "127630", "thread_id": "16731", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Thefearofhavingapanicattack_16731/" } ]

{ "author": "Caitlynn1027", "content": "Hi there, \n\nI've been suffering from anxiety for a little over three years now. My mother passed away when I was 19 and instead of getting depressed, I suffered from severe anxiety which focused on my health and the health of those around me. I was in a train of thought where \"well if this can happen, anything can happen\". I was barely functioning - I only slept about five hours a night and I reached the lowest weight I had ever been at. I made it through, but the anxiety never really left but it seems to grab hold of what I'm fearing and just amplify it. \n\nIt came back full swing when the relationship with my boyfriend of four years ended abruptly last summer and the anxiety will not go away. I have this fear of ending up alone and never being with someone ever again. I'm only 23 and I know that sounds absurd but it truly eats away at me. I want to go out and do so many things but I don't want to do them by myself. It's like one moment I'm ready to take life by the horns and the next I get anxiety attacks over the thought of being alone. \n\nDoes anyone else have this fear? How do you cope with it?\n", "date": "1420300968", "thread_id": "15751", "title": "Being Alone", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/BeingAlone_15751/" }

[ { "author": "CharlieCat", "content": "<p>I'm so sorry for your loss. The constant anxiety can be really terrible, I get it. It's good though that for awhile you made some progress after your mother's death, it shows that you can most definitely deal with it and make it more manageable. I share the same constant worry about ending up alone too. It's something alot of people worry about, you're not alone. I've found that personally, I try to focus on myself when I start to get anxiety about those types of things. It may seem strange but when all I can think about is not having a good future, I just try to focus on the here and now. Thinking about how far you have come &amp; how strong you are can help too. You sound like a very strong person to me, I thinks it's super impressive you've dealt with this. Maybe when you start to worry about the future, you can just take a few deep breaths and think about that &amp; other past accomplishments. Or maybe instead of worrying you'll end up alone, think about all the things you want to do in life that don't require a mate. Even if you do get nervous, get out there to do what you want you won't regret it afterwards! You'll be happy you took the risk.<br><br>Hope this helped a little bit! Stay strong:)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "124315", "thread_id": "15751", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/BeingAlone_15751/" } ]

{ "author": "ChristmasSweater", "content": "Hi everyone. I'd just like to start by saying what a lovely website this is, and how thankful I am that this opportunity has come up for me to speak my mind.\n\n \n\n \n\nThis year has been pretty up and down for me. From starting a new year at a new school, to having simultaneous panic attacks, I've had a pretty weird year. There's been a lot of uncertainty about my life, such as friends and school, which I know can be a factor that can make anxiety worse. But I'll start at the start first...\n\nI know that I've been an anxious child from the start. I always get worried when either a family member or I am by myself or driving somewhere, scared that they or I will get hurt.\n\nFast forward to 2 years ago; my first panic attack. I was in Subway getting lunch with friends quite close to home, and I just felt dizzy, like I couldn't breathe and had to get out of the situation completely. One friend noticed and came out with me. I found out that she suffers with anxiety, so I felt comfortable with her. She's asked me if I've had one since; I lied and said no.\n\nI don't know how to tell anyone that I suffer with anxiety, whether my family or friends. the thought of telling someone my insecurities scares me to know end. I know that all the people who know me close think I'm the funny one who has no problems, but that is so far from the truth that I don't feel like I can truly be myself anymore.\n\nI'm sorry this was so long, but it was quite therapeutic! I haven't told a counselor, friend or family member. My question is- how? How do I do this? \n\nThank you so much :)\n", "date": "1420787775", "thread_id": "16020", "title": "No One Knows I Suffer with Anxiety- How Do I Tell Someone?", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/NoOneKnowsISufferwithAnxietyHowDoITellSomeone_16020/" }

[ { "author": "StrongAndWeak", "content": "<p>I think that anxiety it's pretty much because you overthink a lot. It happens to me and I try to find something quick to clear my mind, and we're alike with the \"everyone thinks I'm funny and have no problems\".</p>\n<p>Find something to do when you get the first feeling of getting anxiety, it will help you stop overthinking things. I hope I helped :)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "121128", "thread_id": "16020", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/NoOneKnowsISufferwithAnxietyHowDoITellSomeone_16020/" }, { "author": "ChristmasSweater", "content": "<p>Thank you<strong>so</strong> much for the reply, this has helped me so much. Knowing that there's someone who has the same struggles as me really comforts me, and I do think that I overthink things a lot.</p>\n<p>I'm trying different techniques to control my anxiety, and will try to speak to a school counseloras soon as I can :)</p>\n<p>You've helped me so much, so thank you; it means a lot :)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "121128,nil" ], "post_id": "121653", "thread_id": "16020", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/NoOneKnowsISufferwithAnxietyHowDoITellSomeone_16020/" }, { "author": "StrongAndWeak", "content": "<p>It's been my pleasure to help you. Anything you need just talk to me :)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "121653,121128,nil" ], "post_id": "122230", "thread_id": "16020", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/NoOneKnowsISufferwithAnxietyHowDoITellSomeone_16020/" }, { "author": "violetsareblue", "content": "<p>I havr no one to talk to, even to my family members. When i try to tell them that i get anxious, they just laugh it off and pretend as though i didnt say anything at all. My mom only cares about my sister and is really protective of her. I feel as though there is no one to protect me from anything :( Sometimes when my anxiety gets really bad, for example in school, i feel really disheartened that i have no one to confide in </p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "122395", "thread_id": "16020", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/NoOneKnowsISufferwithAnxietyHowDoITellSomeone_16020/" }, { "author": "StrongAndWeak", "content": "<p>I feel so bad reading this :(</p>\n<p>people who don't get anxious think others don't. It would be really good if you have someone close like a close friend or cousin who you can talk to and give you advice about it. I always have a friend but lately he has become one of my close friends and the first one who really cares about others. Try to find someone or you can try to reach me, I could help you :)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "122395,nil" ], "post_id": "122641", "thread_id": "16020", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/NoOneKnowsISufferwithAnxietyHowDoITellSomeone_16020/" } ]

{ "author": "Journeyer", "content": "Hi everyone. I've had an extremely stressful day. Basically my dad has had health problems for years and recently came down with the flu and it all caused him to fall down and pass out today. An ambulance came and took him to the hospital and that's where I've been for most of the day and night. Had a couple panic attacks along the way but they said his x-rays looked okay. He's still very weak though and staying at the hospital overnight. I'm still kind of anxious and upset and maybe selfishly wondering why this had to happen to me when I already have problems with anxiety and depression. But I am glad it seems like my dad will be okay and just hope he recovers swiftly. Any thoughts or prayers are appreciated. Thanks guys.\n", "date": "1419827318", "thread_id": "15489", "title": "Scare", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Scare_15489/" }

[ { "author": "Elle22", "content": "<p>Sending good thoughts your way! Handling extra stress on top of other issues can definitely be a challenge.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "113999", "thread_id": "15489", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Scare_15489/" }, { "author": "Journeyer", "content": "<p>It reallyis, but thank youso much. It means a lot. :)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "113999,nil" ], "post_id": "114008", "thread_id": "15489", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Scare_15489/" }, { "author": "easyTortoise20", "content": "<p>My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I pray for a speedy recovery. Be strong.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "114297", "thread_id": "15489", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Scare_15489/" }, { "author": "Journeyer", "content": "<p>Thank you so much. It's been a rough couple of days so your kindness is truly appreciated.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "114297,nil" ], "post_id": "114477", "thread_id": "15489", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Scare_15489/" }, { "author": "whyme11", "content": "<p>Journeyor, im sorry to hear about your dad and you. I will say a prayer for both of you. I tried to make the heart symbol for you and forgot how. bobby</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "114494", "thread_id": "15489", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Scare_15489/" }, { "author": "Journeyer", "content": "<p>Haha, thank you so much, Bobby. My dad is still in the hospital and was in bad shape this morning but seems much better now. I really appreciate your prayers. &lt;3</p>", "parent_ids": [ "114494,nil" ], "post_id": "114516", "thread_id": "15489", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Scare_15489/" }, { "author": "thecorndogisinonit", "content": "<p>Sorry you?re having such a stressful day and that your dad is sick, I can understand the contemplation during these times as it can seem like they pile on you in these annoying vicious clusters, When it rains it pours as they say. Maybe you feel like you?re being selfish but I see it quite differently, you care about your dad and have spent a lot of time in the hospital worrying about him, that doesn?t sound selfish to me. Stressful times can take their toll on even the strongest among us and I think all things considered you doing quite well, even if things feel less than stellar right now. You dad is in the hospital getting quality care he is in good hands and my thoughts and prayers are with you.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "115151", "thread_id": "15489", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Scare_15489/" }, { "author": "Journeyer", "content": "<p>Thank you so much for such the caring message. Your perspective and kindness are truly comforting and happily my dad is now home and on the mend.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "115151,nil" ], "post_id": "115634", "thread_id": "15489", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Scare_15489/" }, { "author": "thecorndogisinonit", "content": "<p>Hey, That'sfantastic news, ongoing care always put strain on people especiallyfamily members, so your feelings are most understandable, you are showing great empathy despite all this you doing a good job, try to get sometime to yourself to \"recharge\" i know its been a rough couple of days for you and more that earned it.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "115634,115151,nil" ], "post_id": "115664", "thread_id": "15489", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Scare_15489/" }, { "author": "thecorndogisinonit", "content": "<p>My typing skills today are less than stellar. sorry</p>", "parent_ids": [ "115664,115634,115151,nil" ], "post_id": "115665", "thread_id": "15489", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Scare_15489/" }, { "author": "Journeyer", "content": "<p>It has been a tiring week and finding time to relax has been a challenge, but thankfully things seem to be slowlyimproving. Thank you again for the message. Happy New Year to you. :)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "115664,115634,115151,nil" ], "post_id": "116120", "thread_id": "15489", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Scare_15489/" }, { "author": "thecorndogisinonit", "content": "<p>Thank you :)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "116120,115664,115634,115151,nil" ], "post_id": "116127", "thread_id": "15489", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Scare_15489/" } ]

{ "author": "Humortrain", "content": "People with social anxiety tend to fear and avoid social situations. They are very\nconcerned that they will do something embarrassing, or that others will judge them. It is\nnormal to feel anxious in social situations from time to time. For example, most people\nfeel anxious when they have to speak in front of a large group. Social anxiety becomes\na problem when it becomes quite distressing and starts getting in the way of your ability\nto function and enjoy life. However, it is important to note that you are not alone. Social\nanxiety is one of the most common anxiety disorders. The good news is that there are\nstrategies you can use to help manage your social fears.\n\n \n\nhttp://www.anxietybc.com/sites/default/files/adult_hmsocial.pdf\n\nhttp://www.helpguide.org/articles/anxiety/social-anxiety-disorder-and-social-phobia.htm\n", "date": "1420059053", "thread_id": "15630", "title": "SELF-HELP STRATEGIES FOR SOCIAL ANXIETY", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/Resources_412/SELFHELPSTRATEGIESFORSOCIALANXIETY_15630/" }

[ { "author": "Stef5", "content": "<p>Don't be nervous when starting to be involvedin a conversation . Face the problem by first saying anything relevant . Be brave &amp; face the problem . Social anxiety is an obstacle , but all obstacles can be faced with a solution . Never say impossible . Anything is POSSIBLE.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "115863", "thread_id": "15630", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/Resources_412/SELFHELPSTRATEGIESFORSOCIALANXIETY_15630/" } ]

{ "author": "MichaelaS", "content": "Sometimes I get panic attacks in school and cannot find ways to calm myself down discreetly. Are there any tips on how to do this? \n", "date": "1419952996", "thread_id": "15544", "title": "Panic attacks in public", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Panicattacksinpublic_15544/" }

[ { "author": "glass7233", "content": "<p>Breathing exercises help tremendously<img title=\"smiley\" alt=\"smiley\" width=\"20\" height=\"20\" src=\"http://app.7cups.com/js/ckeditor/plugins/smiley/images/regular_smile.gif\" style=\"max-width:100%;\"></p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "114824", "thread_id": "15544", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Panicattacksinpublic_15544/" }, { "author": "adaptableThinker17", "content": "<p>I have social anxiety disorder and panic attack in public are a common thing. I like to pretend that everything is okay even though it feels the exact opposite. Breathing techniques are really helpful. Also if you have headphones and some sort ofiPod you can download relaxationexercises / music. Sometimes just leaving the situation can help too.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "114830", "thread_id": "15544", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Panicattacksinpublic_15544/" }, { "author": "Wu994", "content": "<p>I am also have this, I wear sunglasses outside and put headphone on , but not too loud that others get annoyed.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "114858", "thread_id": "15544", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Panicattacksinpublic_15544/" }, { "author": "ontheotherside", "content": "<p>i have had experience with this oh so many times. the best thing i found is to take time out aside for myself, walk out of the room/situation and go somewhere a little more private. i found some teachers to be very very helpful and supportive in calming me down or even calling my mom. i would also take time out to sit and take a breather and do my work on my own.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "115407", "thread_id": "15544", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Panicattacksinpublic_15544/" }, { "author": "notnoelle01", "content": "<p>There's an app called SAM (self-help anxiety managment) in the app store that may help you guys. It helped me out. It's full of calming activites and breathing exercise that you can do discreetly in public on your phone to help distract yourself and calm down. If you struggle from social anxiety like I do this app can be especially useful when you're in a crouded place you can't get out of. </p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "115453", "thread_id": "15544", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Panicattacksinpublic_15544/" } ]

{ "author": "Laura", "content": "What is the difference and how do you know if you are an introvert or really struggling with social anxiety?\n", "date": "1418234511", "thread_id": "11117", "title": "Introvert or socially anxious? ", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Introvertorsociallyanxious_11117/" }

[ { "author": "QuickJazz", "content": "<p>This is a very good question!</p>\n<p>I would say I am an extrovert who has social anxiety, which confuses many people when I try to explain it, and it actually makes a lot of people disbelief I even have social anxiety.</p>\n<p>I really liked this description for Introvert vs. a shy person:</p>\n<p>\"An introvert and a shy person might be standing against the wall at a party, but the introvert prefers to be there, while the shy individual feels she has no choice.\" [<a href=\"http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/201008/revenge-the-introvert\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Source</a>].</p>\n<p>Due to having social anxiety, I cannot be in social situations as much as I would like to nor can I enjoy them as much as I wish to. That's one way I distinguish it.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "100373", "thread_id": "11117", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Introvertorsociallyanxious_11117/" }, { "author": "remnantshadow", "content": "<p>An introvert prefers deep connections with smaller groups of people. We tend to feel drained in large parties etc. and have to 'recharge' by ourselves for a while afterwards ( with a really good book, tea, netflix, etc.).</p>\n<p>Socially anxiety can happen to both introverts and extroverts. It can feel just like @<strong>QuickJazz</strong><strong> </strong>said. Like you don't have a choice but to be on the sidelines. In social situations you could feel like the odd person out, like your opinions don't really matter, or that your are cornered. It's different I think for everyone.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "110049", "thread_id": "11117", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Introvertorsociallyanxious_11117/" }, { "author": "SymphoniousRefine", "content": "<p>Everyone struggles with social anxiety from time to time. But anxiety turns into anxiety disorder when it's prolonged and it starts preventing you from leaving your home, going to the store to get groceries for yourself and/or your family, going to work everyday or school, etc.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "111995", "thread_id": "11117", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Introvertorsociallyanxious_11117/" } ]

{ "author": "hannahj4", "content": "Hi, I suffer from anxiety which causes nausea and I personally don't know how to deal with it and it kicks off for many different reason I don't know why. One of the tines it usually begins to start is when I am just about to meet a very close friend and this is causing problems between us. I'm actually at a point where I think it may have also caused depression, I have no been to a doctor or told anyone in my family as I can't talk about my feelings or problems but I don't know what to do anymore it's killing me. \n", "date": "1418600831", "thread_id": "12230", "title": "Anxiety is ruining my friendship ", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/Anxietyisruiningmyfriendship_12230/" }

[ { "author": "nikabfresh", "content": "<p>Does it only happen with this one person or any friend?</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "102102", "thread_id": "12230", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/Anxietyisruiningmyfriendship_12230/" }, { "author": "hannahj4", "content": "<p>Mainly one person, we met and got really close and knew each other really well I could go to his house and vice versa but then i went to his house once and it came on me all of a sudden and I knew what was going to happen and what was going to start happening and I sort of avoided his house and one day I was fine so I thought there would be no problem but then I as soon as I stepped foot in his house it kicked off and got to the point where I was actually physically sick and we had to leave. I feel bad because it kills him and since then for over a month I haven't seen him bcos I'm scared it will happen again. This time it is just with this I get it but it's been slowly working its way into my co,legs with me and beginning in classes and 2 years ago I used to suffer really bad to the extent Id be sick everyday before school but I sort of over come it and hasn't had it for a year and then all of a sudden it came back and has caused massive issues on my life and I hate it.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "102102,nil" ], "post_id": "103470", "thread_id": "12230", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/Anxietyisruiningmyfriendship_12230/" } ]

{ "author": "nikabfresh", "content": "So I was snooping through my boyfriends phone the other night because I am so afraid that he will cheat online again. He doesn't tell me how he is feeling or if he is mad but when I confronted him about his last online relationship he tole me it was because the thought I didn't want him anymore. It doesn't make sense because I was 3 months pregnant and we were carrying on in a normal relationship. Anyway, now I am so paranoid that anytime we argue or he doesn't like what I say or do, he will retaliate by cheating. So, I carry his phone into the bathroom...before I can even look through the phone I am shaking. It took me 5 minutes to figure what I was doing because I was shaking and so nervous. Once I logged to his email I could hardly see straight.  I saw an email from a sender whose name was the same as the girl he was talking to and I went into full shock. I dropped the phone and realized I was shaking uncontrollably. I was asking myself what's happening to me right now. I told myself I think I'm having a panic attack. My chest was fluttering like I was hyperventilating but I wasn't hyper-ventilating because I was talking myself through my breathing. *In* *out* *in* *out*. After a few minutes it concluded. Does this mean I have a mental illness?  \n", "date": "1418610221", "thread_id": "12237", "title": "1st panic attack", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/1stpanicattack_12237/" }

[ { "author": "hannahx5sos", "content": "<p>It is good that you've come to this website to ask about this, because when I has my first panic attack, I thought that means I had to take loads of medications and be put in a hospital and things like that, which I was totally wrong about. Don't worry, it's not a mental illness. It just means you have a little higherlevel of anxiety than normal, which you callus probably talk to your doctor about and they could refer you to a some type of councilor :)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "102134", "thread_id": "12237", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/1stpanicattack_12237/" } ]

{ "author": "sociallyawkard1997", "content": "Hi guys, I cant even make it to my classes in highschool unless I've ran at the gym for half an hour everyday. \n", "date": "1418173762", "thread_id": "11072", "title": "Social anxiety and depression at school", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Socialanxietyanddepressionatschool_11072/" }

[ { "author": "EmpatheticDude", "content": "<p>I'm sorry you're going through that. Does running help you feel less anxious, or are you running to get to class?</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "97971", "thread_id": "11072", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Socialanxietyanddepressionatschool_11072/" }, { "author": "sociallyawkard1997", "content": "<p>running helps me fgeel like i can be more angry and in my body so yeah it helps, same with wieghts but its not enough</p>", "parent_ids": [ "97971,nil" ], "post_id": "97977", "thread_id": "11072", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Socialanxietyanddepressionatschool_11072/" }, { "author": "StrawberryM", "content": "<p>It sounds like the running releases stress and anxiety for you. (Which is great to have a release.) Maybe try to find some other mechanisms to help you relax before school. Talking to a friend or one of the listeners on here, music might help. Hope this helps!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "98067", "thread_id": "11072", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Socialanxietyanddepressionatschool_11072/" } ]

{ "author": "slimshady0116", "content": "I'm 18 years old and I've been experiencing panic attacks for almost 3 years now. I get nauseous, sweaty, shaky, dizzy, lightheaded, my heart races, and I can't breathe. I've also fainted twice from them and threw up once. These happen out of nowhere at home, work, school, etc. with nothing triggering them. I've been to a counselor for these before and they gave me breathing techniques, but they don't seem to help. Does anyone have any advice on how to overcome the panic attacks? They aren't enjoyable at all and my parents won't let me go on medicine. Thanks!\n", "date": "1418010362", "thread_id": "9044", "title": "Really need help with panic attacks!", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Reallyneedhelpwithpanicattacks_9044/" }

[ { "author": "1159", "content": "<p>slimshady0116 I had panic attacks at 18 also. Here's what worked for me:</p>\n<p>Breathe slowly. Count to 4 on the inbreath, aim for a slower outbreath, 6 or 8. Do this several times until you slow your roll a bit.</p>\n<p>Distract yourself. I like looking at art, but whatever feeds your head without being disturbing (loud, violent, or scary stuff should wait for another time) Sometimes lol cats or other funny videos are perfect.</p>\n<p>Remind yourself that panic attacks are not damaging to you. You are not alone in experiencing them. They don't last very long, neither does whatever situation caused the attack in the first place.</p>\n<p>I'm working my way through the \"Managing Emotions\" self-help guide here on 7cups and its been helpful. Namaste</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "94771", "thread_id": "9044", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Reallyneedhelpwithpanicattacks_9044/" } ]

{ "author": "Linni", "content": "Hi! My name is Linnea. I go to a music school and that means that I have music 5 times every week. So this week we are having Christmas concerts. We don't have any ordinary classes for the entire week. That may sound like a dream for some people but it's like the opposite. I suffer from anxiety and panic attacks, today was the first day of rehearsals. It started of pretty good but after lunch it went down the hill. And at the end of the day I could barley breath and I where very close to have a panic attack. Luckily I could save myself and I ran out from the room we were in. But I Can't do that for the entire week, especially not during a concert. Do you have any tips how I can do to not pass out or have panic attacks every day?? \n", "date": "1417469440", "thread_id": "8642", "title": "Excited but scared ", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Excitedbutscared_8642/" }

[ { "author": "sympatheticWriter49", "content": "<p>Hi Linnea,</p>\n<p>Please know that your not alone, I suffer from anxiety and panic too. I'm proud of you that you are able to be in a social setting, that in itself is amazing. Have you tried wearing a rubberbandaround your wrist? you'll want to pull it back and snap it on your wrist in time of panic. I'm sending prayers and hugs your way, I know you'll get through this.</p>\n<p>warm fuzzies, Gail</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "91049", "thread_id": "8642", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Excitedbutscared_8642/" } ]

{ "author": "NattAshleigh", "content": "Recently I've been so anxious and I can't relax. Meditation and yoga used to do the trick but now it's impossible. I'm constantly clenching my jaw, it's gettig to the point where my teeth are hurting, and it's waking me up in the middle of the night- I can't even relax while I'm sleeping, I still clench my jaw! Does anybody have any suggestions for what might help? I'm desperate!\n", "date": "1417455658", "thread_id": "8629", "title": "Anxious and on edge?", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/Anxiousandonedge_8629/" }

[ { "author": "rileygirl", "content": "<p>Hey!</p>\n<p>Hmmm, have you tried to position the tip of your tongue between your teeth?</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "90356", "thread_id": "8629", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/Anxiousandonedge_8629/" }, { "author": "NattAshleigh", "content": "<p>Haha that's a good point actually, I'll give that a go!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "90356,nil" ], "post_id": "90360", "thread_id": "8629", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/Anxiousandonedge_8629/" }, { "author": "rileygirl", "content": "<p>Tell me how it works!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "90369", "thread_id": "8629", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/Anxiousandonedge_8629/" }, { "author": "Findmyway55", "content": "<p>Drink some Lemon balm tea. That has a real calming effect and let's you sleep. Try deep breathing and relaxing each muscle from the toes to your head. Also, reading puts me to sleep and let's me focus on something else besides me. Hope this helps! ((Hugs))</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "90447", "thread_id": "8629", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/Anxiousandonedge_8629/" }, { "author": "NattAshleigh", "content": "<p>I've tried reading, didn't help!:( but I'll try the tea, Thankyou so much!!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "90447,nil" ], "post_id": "90490", "thread_id": "8629", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/Anxiousandonedge_8629/" }, { "author": "TransAm85", "content": "<p>My husband makes this tea with lime, cinnamon and a shot of tequila .. it helps w/a cold, stress, and hard time sleeping actually! But .. Sex works also. It's like a tension reducer for some reason.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "90484", "thread_id": "8629", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/Anxiousandonedge_8629/" }, { "author": "NattAshleigh", "content": "<p>Oooh, I'll give the tea ago, an excuse to get some tequila!;) I don't think the sex thing will be happening anytime soon though, haha, recently single!! Thankyou!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "90484,nil" ], "post_id": "90492", "thread_id": "8629", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/ShareYourStory_667/Anxiousandonedge_8629/" } ]

{ "author": "diem", "content": "how can i to overcome this?\n", "date": "1417164752", "thread_id": "8502", "title": "i have a social anxiety", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/ihaveasocialanxiety_8502/" }

[ { "author": "None", "content": "<p>Hello there, @diem</p>\n<p>I'll tell you a little story about what I did today, something I'm really proud of and something many people might not easily understand.</p>\n<p>Several days ago, I realized I needed to order a certain document from another country for some very important matters. I had always, and my that I mean just about always, been worried and scared of doing anything on which people could judge me, whether those things were actions, verbal speech, or writing, so just placing an order for that document online, which required me to enter my credit card numbers, address and personal information, scared me enough to make me want to crawl to a hole and hide.....It really did.</p>\n<p>But then, despite the fear, I did it anyway and ordered the document to be delivered to my home via FedEx (which was supposed to be quite a bit faster and more reliable than standard postal services), and the document did move really quickly from across the ocean, passed China, and finally landed in Thailand, my birth country. I was so excited to see the mail move so fast from one place to another. I could imagine the shipment arriving on my home right on time as it was intended to. Though, that didn't happen, and the package is right now still sitting in a FedEx facility somewhere in Bangkok, this country's capital. I wanted to figure out why it didn't reach me yesterday as it was supposed to, so I put in the tracking numbers right where the site told me to and discovered that the status was \"Incorrect Address\". I was bewildered; how could this be? I entered the the address and the numbers and everything correctly. I was so worried I would get it so wrong and the mail would go someplace like Taiwan or something instead of reaching me like I wanted it to. I needed to do something... I needed to do something because the shipment I had ordered would return to its sender within 5 days of waiting if it can't reach its destination (If I read the site correctly), so I checked out their customer service. This is scary territory for me and probably many who are nervous when they have to express themselves to others, just like you. My grammar's much better now because I made sure to study them as soon as I realized it has lots of room for people to criticize, so I decided to draft a message to their customer service and requested my shipment. I even gave them the coordinates to my home, thanks to Google Maps. Oh, the \"Send\" button got my hand a little jumpy, and I was worried still that there would be mistakes, but I sent the message anyway, hoping for a speedy explanation and delivery of my shipment.</p>\n<p>I was okay with stopping and calling it a day, but then I thought \"What if.... What if the time taken for the message to actually get be read by FedEx was longer than 5 days? They sure have lots of customers, I think\", so I decided to put a little security blanket over me by making a phone call to their FedEx's customer service.</p>\n<p>Here comes my proud moment. I was scared.... scared! I wanted my package, but I was so scared of speaking to people, let alone demand answers from them! My body was going crazy, and I felt aches allover. But.... I knew I had to do it. No, I wanted to do it. As anxious as I was, I wanted to overcome my fears. Yes, it was as hard as climbing a cliff backwards with your head pointed towards the ground (awesome way to put it, right?), but I did it. I dialed the numbers one by one, pressed a couple more numbers as instructed by the machine, said hello to the man who greeted me, asked him about my shipment and why it has not been delivered to me as it should have, and got the answers I was looking for.. I found out the deliver didn't reach me, because they couldn't find our address in the middle of nowhere surrounded by sugarcane plantations, so they took my shipment back to their facility to be later shipped back to the sender. Now, to the point of this very long story, I felt like I was going to have a heart attack throughout the whole 2 minutes I spoke to the man from FedEx, and that feeling stayed with me for a good long time after that, but on top of that terrible feeling was a real and deep sense of satisfaction in facing my fears and achieving what I set out to do. That is why I am proud today, and I now expect my delayed shipment to arrive to at my home tomorrow morning.</p>\n<p>Anxiety is hard and it makes you want to avoid the source of your anxiety in order to avoid feeling so bad again. But I tell you, facing what you're afraid of and doing what you want to or what has to be done is much more rewarding than avoiding your fears. I was avoidant too, and I never thought I could do what I did today. True courage is not never knowing fear but instead taking right actions despite the fear. You have social anxiety, and it might be really hard for you to approach and speak to people, so you might (note the mights...I don't fully understand what your experience is like, so I leave ends open), avoid situations in which you are expected to talk or socialize with people, but eventually you might want to slowly and gradually face your fears and break the anxious cycle. Actually, by coming here and posting, you already are making efforts, and you have courage. I am proud of you too for being so courageous and coming here. I hope what I said to you today is useful. I'll answer any questions you may have to the best of my abilities.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "88851", "thread_id": "8502", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/ihaveasocialanxiety_8502/" }, { "author": "diem", "content": "<p>thank youi really appreciate your reply i also experienced that having a delayed a package and it made me so anxious my hands are trembling ifeel like my knees are going to collapse when talking to the costumers service.one thing also that madme bothered is that i cant express myself :(</p>", "parent_ids": [ "88851,nil" ], "post_id": "88886", "thread_id": "8502", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/ihaveasocialanxiety_8502/" }, { "author": "diem", "content": "<p>sorry for the typos here is the correction</p>\n<p></p>\n<p>thank youi really appreciate your reply i also experienced that having a delayed package and it made me so anxious my hands are trembling ifeel like my knees are going to collapse when talking to the costumers service.one thing also that made me bothered is that i cant express myself :(</p>\n<p></p>\n<p></p>", "parent_ids": [ "88886,88851,nil" ], "post_id": "88889", "thread_id": "8502", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/ihaveasocialanxiety_8502/" }, { "author": "None", "content": "<p>That's quite all right. I made loads of typos up there (which now is driving me crazy!! I wanna correct them!). It's okay. It might take awhile, but as long as we don't give up, we'll get there. If you fall, you dust yourself up and move on. I know you can do this!!!!!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "88889,88886,88851,nil" ], "post_id": "88893", "thread_id": "8502", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/ihaveasocialanxiety_8502/" }, { "author": "diem", "content": "<p>Thank you! i never thought that someone would answer this</p>", "parent_ids": [ "88893,88889,88886,88851,nil" ], "post_id": "88902", "thread_id": "8502", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/ihaveasocialanxiety_8502/" }, { "author": "Dost", "content": "<p>Hello, Diem! Joining the website and posting this question here was your first step to 'overcoming' social anxiety. I'm glad you took this step :) I, too, have always had social anxiety. I put the word 'overcoming' in inverted commas because everyone gets more or less anxious in social situations. So, there's no overcoming it, only bringing it down to 'normal' or acceptable levels.</p>\n<p>One way of doing it is, as Amboredd mentioned, to slowly and gradually expose yourself to situations which make you anxious. It might help to realize that everyone is self-conscious in a social situation. When you feel like people are staring at you or judging you, realize that most other people are also wary of being judged for their clothes, the way they speak, the way they act etc.</p>\n<p>Set yourself small goals like saying 'hello' to someone and smiling, or asking someone for directions. Writes these goals down and put a big tick mark against it when you have achieved one small goal, then move on to the next, bigger social situation. Take it slow and easy.</p>\n<p>Also, check out lesson 5 of the 'Anxiety guide' in our self-help guides section, it deals with 'Relaxation techniques'. I recommend practicing diaphragmatic breathing everyday. In social situations, our heart beats faster and breathing gets choppy. which also might lead to shaking (hand, head). Diaphragmatic breathing might help you breathe properly in social situations.</p>\n<p>As human beings, we are wired in such a way that we learn from our experiences. When we find ourselves in a similar situation the next time, we automatically recall what learned and apply it, and, consequently, we end up with better results. What I'm getting at is, keep trying, don't avoid any situations. If you avoid a situation, you can't learn from it, and, thus, it's harder to improve.</p>\n<p>I hope this helps :)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "89819", "thread_id": "8502", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/ihaveasocialanxiety_8502/" } ]

{ "author": "diem", "content": "how can i  overcome this?\n", "date": "1417164876", "thread_id": "8503", "title": "i have a social anxiety", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/ihaveasocialanxiety_8503/" }

[ { "author": "chioo", "content": "<p>Hey there :) I'm glad you're here. Can you tell me how you feel? We can get through it together. Work it out. *hugs*</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "88845", "thread_id": "8503", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/ihaveasocialanxiety_8503/" }, { "author": "None", "content": "<p>Hi there; I posted a reply to another thread you posted. I hope it can help.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "88853", "thread_id": "8503", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/ihaveasocialanxiety_8503/" } ]

{ "author": "Gabbybunny", "content": "i've been struggling with social anxiety my whole life, but nobody knows how bad it is. My parents know that i get extremely nervous in front of people. I just would never have the heart to say there isn't a day that i don't think about killing myself. They don't know the true panic i go through. My friends know even less. I'm afraid of having to much baggage or having to be taken care of by them. I don't think anyone will truly understand or take me seriously when i say something is wrong. I just want everyone to magicly understand and not treat me like a freak. I have feelings too.\n", "date": "1415671365", "thread_id": "7500", "title": "hiding myself", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/hidingmyself_7500/" }

[ { "author": "user2222", "content": "<p>I have social anxiety too. You're not alone.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "78932", "thread_id": "7500", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/hidingmyself_7500/" }, { "author": "Ej", "content": "<p>I am so sorry for what you're going through. It must feel lonely at times feeling no one else is able to understand you. Just know that we are here for you in full capacity and here you'll find a loving and encouraging group.</p>\n<p>My question to you is, have you ever sat your family down and truly stressed the significance of social anxiety and its constraints onyour life?<br><br>Regardless, I am proud you have come here to share your story. That in itself is a huge step, and remember: we are here for you. :)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "78946", "thread_id": "7500", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/hidingmyself_7500/" } ]

{ "author": "NemoNobody", "content": "TRUE Panic Attacks?! I'm not sure but I have severe panic disorder...crippling. I was getting them daily for years...just the mention of the word 'panic' or 'heart' or 'dead'...even 'uptight' or 'anxiety' would throw me into a SERIOUS panic attack.\n\nAt one point a few years ago, I had a series of attacks that lasted the entire weekend (Keep in mind I've worked my way up to over 8mgs of klonopin per day...not so much now).\n\nBut I was living at a friend's lake house and sleeping downstairs. Shortly before that, I ended up with a worthless shrink who didn't believe in meds, so too, my klonopin of over 15 years away and put me on worthless Viseril (spelling).\n\nThis one attack specifically, began slowly...coming and going...phantom attacks. But soon they turned into pretty bad attacks. When I say pretty bad, I'm sure it's not what you are thinking. I was gasping for air, felt like I was going to die at any moment...would chain smoke, drink, go outside...whatever to try to get my mind off of the attack.\n\nWhen I stepped outside, it was cloud covered, and suddenly I literally imagined the sky slowly falling and the pressure would end up crushing me. It's hard to describe. \n\nI'm a total burn-out paranoid shut-in anyway, but I would compare it to maybe being under water and can't hold your breath much longer and you begin thinking you will run out of O2.\n\nI had a similar experience with the under water thing when I went snorkling off the Florida Keys. I couldn't just float below sea level to see things and you can't use your nose to breath...just this thin short tube coming out of your mouth; and then having goggles on as well.\n\nAnyway, it was later in the evening and the attack was still lingering. My friend was half kissing the floor and crashed, so I was by myself.\n\nIt had been going on at least 7+ hours at that point. But after he passed out, my mind drifted to MAJOR lucidity. All I could think about AND CLEARLY SEE, was my heart pumping...each beat...the arteries, the blood going through it, the heart itself pumping quickly and thinking with each beat (which I could clearly see in my mind) was going to be my last.\n\nI also have physical problems and used a cane then (before being wheelchair bound).\n\nMy friend was out of it and I couldn't get that image, that feeling to stop (If you are familiar with that EDGAR ALLEN POE story...The Raven is it? I don't remember) when he was sitting in the room talking to the police and was fixated on the old man's heartbeat whom was buried under the floor which finally got so intense it drove him mad)...that's what it was like.\n\nI, which I later found out had been hours, was pacing around the pool table in the basement literally non stop (and I also imagined the only thing that would keep me going were cigarettes, so for hours I was pacing and chain smoking non stop literally...to the point of exhaustion, but it still wouldn't stop.\n\nIt got to be morning and still going, I finally went upstairs, got a big knife from the kitchen, walked into my friend's bedroom, woke him, had the knife to my chest, and screamed I CANNOT TAKE THIS ONE MORE SECOND!\n\nHe jumped out of bed, grabbed the knife and drove me to the hospital. I got there and they played their usual waiting game; they put me in a separate room because I also have social/socio phobias) where it was small and I just kept pacing while they were screwing around ( I was still pacing at full speed; I still remember it was 8 long footsteps/strides from one wall to the next...back and forth, sweating...it was all I could do).\n\nA nurse came in and asked me to sit but I couldn't; while pacing, I told the nurse quickly and in a panic that this was a full-blown panic attack and has lasted/I'd been pacing etc. for damn near 11 hours...approx.: and needed a shot, something right away).\n\nShe asked another question and I, while pacing SCREAMED 'I need a shot now...' she said she'd be back in a minute.\n\nI was still pacing back and forth, totally exhausted, when this ( I later found out was a shrink/social worker) came in, sat down and started asking me what was going on; 'how do I know it's a panic attack and not a heart attack..' stupid crap; I SCREAMED AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS TO GET THE F$^K OUT DUMB C&@T, I grabbed the table she was sitting next to with her notepad and a bible on it and threw it across the room. Needless to say, she left.\n\nAnyway, a minute later, a nurse came in and gave me a shot, and it stopped in a couple of minutes (some Benzo, I don't remember).\n\nI was finally able to breathe and talk. I explained the situation, and the next thing I knew, they told my friend they were going to admit me in the psych ward (I was there I think 8 days).\n\nThere is no moral to the story...I guess no point either. However, when I in there, they put me back on my klonopin and put me on high doses of Prozac and Neurontin with klonopin when having full blown attacks.\n\nI'll tell you, it's been about four years now and I'm still on the Prozac and Neurontin and it was done WONDERS for me! I haven't had a major attack this whole time. Don't even use all of my klonopin monthly...just in bad cases.\n\nI'm not advising anything, but that cocktail they started me on has done wonders for my panic disorder.\n\nSo sorry for the long story...I get carried away.\n\nBack to the original question 'How Common Are Panic Attacks?'\n\nI suppose that question is impossible to answer because symptoms vary as well as intensity from person to person.\n\nGood day.\n", "date": "1415024216", "thread_id": "7187", "title": "SO YOU WANT TO TALK PANIC ATTACKS/DISORDER? The Crippling Kind? Here's a story...", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/SOYOUWANTTOTALKPANICATTACKSDISORDERTheCripplingKindHeresastory_7187/" }

[ { "author": "Joelle", "content": "<p>The book is called \"Tell tale heart\" (one of my favorite books). Well first of all I am so sorry about what you are going through. Panic attacks are not as rare as you think they are since a lot of people would never share it with the world, fearing that they would be misunderstood or judged. In my opinion, being closely monitored by a good psychiatrist/psychologist (and I insist on the adjective \"good\") is a very important, especially when someone is having panic attacks that are as severe as yours. Also try to find things that give you a sense of safety, security, and internal peace and warmth, and make sure you keep them around you so you can use them to counterbalance those attacks. It could be a picture of a sunflower, a particular piece of fabric, a tester filled with a scent that makes you feel better, a plush, really anything. Stay strong! You are not alone!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "75790", "thread_id": "7187", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/SOYOUWANTTOTALKPANICATTACKSDISORDERTheCripplingKindHeresastory_7187/" }, { "author": "Joelle", "content": "<p>*is very important\n(Sorry about the different typing mistakes I was typing too fast)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "75790,nil" ], "post_id": "75792", "thread_id": "7187", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/SOYOUWANTTOTALKPANICATTACKSDISORDERTheCripplingKindHeresastory_7187/" } ]

{ "author": "FrancescaGabrielle", "content": "Anyone have trouble dealing with anxiety and panic attacks? I'd love to help you out. I've actually experienced a lot of anxiety and so I can relate to whatever it is you're going through.\n\nI was wondering if any of you have come up with successful coping strategies to help prevent your panic attacks from happening? Anything interesting that helps you personally?\n\nBEST WISHES    -Francesca \n", "date": "1414143764", "thread_id": "6780", "title": "Panic Attacks?", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacks_6780/" }

[ { "author": "swallowfall", "content": "<p>Generally I try to remember some breathing tricks, but I usually don't even notice that I'm having a panic attack until it's set in. Dealing with the aftermath means a big glass of iced water, and trying to stay away from other people. If I can, I try to find a friend (online or over text) to walk me through it.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "71944", "thread_id": "6780", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacks_6780/" }, { "author": "LionessHeart", "content": "<p>I usually don't notice my panic attack until I'm hyperventilating and about to lose it.</p>\n<p>Back when my best friend was my roommate, she was prepared for them. drinking or eating something cold helps. Usually a hot bath afterwards soothes me. During? It just takes me time</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "73169", "thread_id": "6780", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttacks_6780/" } ]

{ "author": "Merpology", "content": "When I was 14, my house burnt down and we lost everything. My abusive parents decided to place the blame on me even though I wasn't even home. During and after that experience, they never once tried to comfort me, and ever since I have had a crippling fear of any fire. \n\nA few nights ago, I pledged to a social club (sorority. I'm a college freshman), and during the process we had to hold a lit candle inches from our faces. No one in this club knows about my fear, and I didn't want to make a deal about it, so I just dealt with it and tried not to faint or have a panic attack. Now, three days later, every time I close my eyes I see that flame, and feel the panic attacks coming. I haven't hardly slept out of fear of a fire or even seeing the candle. I could really use some support and any prayers yall have to give for what I'm currently struggling with. I just want to stop seeing the flames every time I close my eyes. I honestly can't even charge my phone without worrying there will be a fire. \n", "date": "1414393625", "thread_id": "6877", "title": "Scared of a little candle", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/Phobias_250/Scaredofalittlecandle_6877/" }

[ { "author": "Firefly2", "content": "<p>I can kinda understand where you are coming from ith the fire phobia. Whrn I was little(like 6 or 7 years old, my parents showed me pictures of people who had been badly scarred from bring burnt. Told me awful stories because \"they wanted me to be careful around fire\". I was, infact I was always far away from the fire. I became really afraid of it. To this day I'm scared of fire. I don't like burning candles, not even in glass jars. I'm always worried that the lady below me is going to fall asleep with her cigarettes and set fire to the apartment. I'm afraid of the gas stoves too. Phobias are not easily overcome, and some as with yours are experience caused. Do you have any thing that helps calm you? I usually turn to distraction, music or a comic book to help me relax and clear my mind of the thoughts.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "73009", "thread_id": "6877", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/Phobias_250/Scaredofalittlecandle_6877/" } ]

{ "author": "Mircea", "content": "I've been on this emotional decline since April. I feel overwhelmed constantly even over the little things. I don't know what to do anymore. Talking seems to help, but only so much. The feeling of being a burden when I talk about how I feel is just as overwhelming.    \n", "date": "1412632227", "thread_id": "6188", "title": "My panic attacks and depression are destroying my marriage before I even walk down the aisle.", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/MypanicattacksanddepressionaredestroyingmymarriagebeforeIevenwalkdowntheaisle_6188/" }

[ { "author": "Brittany96", "content": "<p>I'm sorry that you're experiencing panic attacks and depression. Would you like to tell me more about why you feel like it's destroying your marriage? Also, you're not a burden for talking about your struggles. If someone didn't want to listen as you talk about what you're going through, then they would just ask you to stop. If someone's taking the time to chat with you and listen to you, then obviously they don't consider you a burden. :)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "65076", "thread_id": "6188", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/MypanicattacksanddepressionaredestroyingmymarriagebeforeIevenwalkdowntheaisle_6188/" } ]

{ "author": "Kate333", "content": "So, I never posted a forum before so bare with me and I'm sorry if I wrote it in the wrong place, I was out with my family at the mall and we were in the food court. It was at lunch time and it was full of people.  I couldn't even breath right because I thought the second I did that the room would stop and stare at me, I got shakey and I turned warm and white and I was panicking over nothing. I know I'm not the only one who has these \" episodes\" if you want to call them that but why do we feel scared of people when we know deep inside most people in this world have the same fears? I hope this doesn't make me sound stupid. \n", "date": "1409789429", "thread_id": "5189", "title": "Panic Attack and Thoughts.", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttackandThoughts_5189/" }

[ { "author": "Dioniche", "content": "<p>What you wrote and experienced does not sound stupid at all. In fact, it sounds like you may have experienced <u>agoraphobia</u>, a fear of being in open, crowded public spaces.</p>\n<p>You might look into sources on how to handle panic attacks, both here and elsewhere online. Here's a article that I found that could be useful:http://www.anxietybc.com/sites/default/files/adult_hmpanic.pdf</p>\n<p>If the panic attacks are really bad and constant, seeing a counselor might also help.</p>\n<p>Best wishes to you!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "57154", "thread_id": "5189", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttackandThoughts_5189/" }, { "author": "Kate333", "content": "<p>Thank you so much! I really Appreceate it!!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "57154,nil" ], "post_id": "57683", "thread_id": "5189", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttackandThoughts_5189/" }, { "author": "acicada", "content": "<p>I too have this feel. Buy for me its the heights. Whene ever I get on top of Mountain or tower or top floor. I feel like am not able to breathe and fainting. I don't know how to divert my mind</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "64131", "thread_id": "5189", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttackandThoughts_5189/" }, { "author": "sillyputty", "content": "<p>Totally normal...happens to lots of people, and it's something that can be managed, In the old days people called it being shy, or having trouble with public speaking, or 'nerves'. What's really funny, is that people in our families and other networks can really make it worse just by trying to help! It's kind of sweet and kind of frustrating, too.</p>\n<p>When I was in college, my best friend had what you experience whenever she had to speak to a group. Even if it was a group of her closest friends. She would have all the symptoms you experience, and would even cry or feel like feinting. It's a real thing, for sure! My partner is the same way. Thing is, my friend is now a college professor, and she speaks at conferences all over the world. What worked for her was small doses over time....she deliberately put herslef in situations where she had to speak publically over time....small groups, just once a month, leading to bigger groups, leading to more often during the week....and now it's second nature.</p>\n<p>I think there is a word for that...gradual exposure or something.</p>\n<p>At any rate, what worked for her might not work for you....but there is a lot of stuff you can try...some of it is even fun, like doing art for meditation! (If art is your thing, it can be anything really, that you use to train yourself to stay calm.) There is a good book called \"the anxiety and phobia workbook\" that you can order from your library, if you have a card. It's pretty neat (that's what my partner is using).</p>\n<p>Good luck, friend! Glad you talked to us about it...that's the first step, and I have a lot of hope for you....I really believe you'll feel better.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "64154", "thread_id": "5189", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/PanicAttackandThoughts_5189/" } ]

{ "author": "lexxx", "content": "I've had anxiety in general for a few years now, and I get panic attacks a few times a week. I've always heard people talk about social anxiety, and knew it never applied to me. I've always been more on the shy side, but it was never too bad. Well lately it's getting really bad and starting to affect my life. I literally have no friends and am constantly alone. It's like I've spent so much time alone I've forgotten how to talk to people. If a person talks to me in a class I get so scared that the next day I sit in a different seat or spend the rest of class analyzing every single thing I did and I start feeling like I'm going to have a panic attack. I just want to be able to talk to people and not feel alone constantly :/ I feel like everyone thinks I'm extremely rude, but really it's just scaring me so much. How can I get over this?\n", "date": "1411617345", "thread_id": "5868", "title": "I think I'm developing social anxiety..", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/IthinkImdevelopingsocialanxiety_5868/" }

[ { "author": "laurlistens", "content": "<p>@Lexxx</p>\n<p>Hey, thank you for posting this and sharing your story! I looked somethings up for you and here's what I gathered:</p>\n<p>1.<strong>Set Goals:</strong>Short term goals that are manageable in a time limit that you can achieve. An example you could possibly use could be: When someone talked to me in class, I will sit next to them the next day.</p>\n<p>2. <b>Breathe Deep:</b>This can help you when you feel a panic attack/anxiety attack coming on in a situation and hopefully can help you remain calmer and be able to \"handle\" the situation. (Not saying you can't handle it, it was the only word I can come up with)</p>\n<p>3.<strong>Create an exposure hierarchy:</strong>An exposure hierarchy is a list ? akin to a ladder ? where you write down situations that cause you anxiety, in order of severity. Then you perform the easiest behavior, and keep moving up the list.​ (KInd of like goal setting!)</p>\n<p>4. <b>Remain positive:</b>Instead of going into these situations and thinking \"omg I'm going to freak\" \"no one likes me\" or what ever you may be thinking, change that. You could think (And adjust to your situation) \"I come to class everyday, and people have spoken to me. They don't seem to hate me, so I can do it again\"</p>\n<p>I hope I was able to help a bit. These are suggestions and of course you aren't obligated to do them!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "62371", "thread_id": "5868", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/IthinkImdevelopingsocialanxiety_5868/" } ]

{ "author": "Damiana", "content": "I look around at everyone's daily interactions at work, online, in public. They all seem to converse with each other so effortlessly, and there I am, wishing I had someone to even hang out with. Why wasn't I given even the slightest bit of charisma? Why do I have a mini panic attack anytime someone even says hi to me or acknowledges my existence?\n\ni watch my coworkers get into conversations with complete strangers. (We work at a diner type establishment.) How do these people always have something to say, and everyone else able to continue on so easily with them? I don't feel normal. Like I never grew out of my teenage years of being shy and young. I am consistently, and almost daily, hearing comments about how quiet I am.\n\nMaking friends, let alone keeping them, seems like an impossibility to me. The last actual female friend I had was back in high school. The last actual male friend I had that wasn't just friends with me to try and get in my pants was also in high school and he was gay. And I feel like it's so difficult for me to make friends because of my aforementioned quietness.\n\nIt's getting harder for me as the years go by to find anyone I can even stand being around for an extended period of time. I feel alienated. I feel like the loneliness is only going to get worse. The acquaintances I do have that are available to talk to would not understand the slightest bit what I am talking about and it makes me feel like I am insane.\n\nMaybe I am?\n", "date": "1410429819", "thread_id": "5449", "title": "Is there something wrong with me?", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Istheresomethingwrongwithme_5449/" }

[ { "author": "exampligratia", "content": "<p>It sounds like you're an introvert. But maybe not too. Typically people think introverts are shy or anti social which isnt the case. Introverts can be friendly its just that they prefer interactions in small doses or only with people they know really well. That being said, you're just very shy.</p>\n<p>Anyway its hard to find a person who clicks with us, us meaning people like you and I, the quiet, shy and hang-back types. Extroverts or non-shy introverts can easily get along with people. Its in their nature. Their aura or energy.</p>\n<p>You just have to find someone who clicks with you. No need to rush into conversations. Just make small talk with someone who looks like they are hanging-back as well. Or just build upon your existing relationships. Its all simple things to do, just requiring massive courage in the 1st act of trying to reach out to someone.</p>\n<p>For me, back when I was in a similar situation to yours, I just basically had \"suicidal\" or \"do or die\" mindset. I just randomly walked up to people I thought were worth getting to know and talked to them. I might lose, but I was definitely not winning if I did nothing.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "55715", "thread_id": "5449", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/Istheresomethingwrongwithme_5449/" } ]

{ "author": "HannahJane", "content": "When I was younger, I never cared what anyone thought of me. I was the most care-free four year old and the way everyone should be, honestly. But eventually when I became aware that people were making fun of me just for being myself, I began to care what everyone thought of me. What my family, friends, teachers, neighbors, and everyone thought of me really made care. I had social phobia. Luckily, this only lasted a few months until I figured out I shouldn’t care what anybody else thinks about me.I am a big advocate on this because it’s not just the fear of judgement, judgement leads to bullying and so many other horrible things. My goal is to open people’s eyes to understand they were put here for a reason and they are perfect the way they are.\n\n \n\n“Social phobia- (n)- Social phobia, also called Social Anxiety Disorder, is an anxiety disorder characterized by overwhelming anxiety and excessive self-consciousness in everyday social situations.The duration is at least 6 months to the fear, anxiety, or avoidance is persistent, typically lasting 6 or more months.  The rest of the diagnostic definition remains the same.”\n\n \n\nPeople with social anxiety disorder usually experience significant emotional distress in the following situations:\n\n•        Being introduced to other people\n\n•        Being teased or criticized\n\n•        Being the center of attention\n\n•        Being watched while doing something\n\n•        Meeting people in authority (\"important people\")\n\n•        Most social encounters, especially with strangers\n\n•        Going around the room (or table) in a circle and having to say something\n\nThis list is certainly not a complete list of symptoms -- other feelings may be associated with social anxiety as well.\n\n“It’s taken me years to realize I can break that all down. I can choose not to assume that people are judging me, thinking they’re better than me. I can assume people see the best in me—as I’m able to see in them when I stop obsessing about myself.\n\nDoes this mean no one will ever feel superior or judge? Not at all—though it’s possible that when they do, they’ll be standing behind their own heap of insecurities, wanting to feel more assured but knowing no other way to do it.”\n\nThese are some thoughts that someone with social phobia/anxiety might think about:\n\n\"It’s just easier to avoid social situations.\"\n\n\"I would freeze up every time I had to meet someone in authority....\"\n\n\"I’m the only one in the world who has these terrible symptoms....\"\n\nBREAKING THE CYCLE:\n\n“Every time you judge someone else you perpetuate the cycle of judgement.\n\nConsider the example above. If you judge someone’s clothing, you’re going to expect others to be judging your clothing as well.”\n\nBreak the cycle by simply treating people how you want ot be treated, if you don’t want to be judged, don't judge someone else.\n\nDiscussion Questions?\n\n1.) Is there a difference between Moral Judgement and Character Judgement, if so, in your own words what is it?\n\n2.) What are you tired of being judged for?\n\n3.) Can you replace judgement with curiosity, if so how?\n\n \n\n \n", "date": "1407214188", "thread_id": "4049", "title": "Members Community Discussion -The Fear of Judgement", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/MembersCommunityDiscussionTheFearofJudgement_4049/" }

[ { "author": "lucy1983", "content": "<p>This is so awesome!!!! I have so much social anxiety it almost feels like a terminal illness... like I won't survive it. But I will. I really like these things to think about... I am going to print them off and take them to my therapy appt!!!!!!<img width=\"20\" height=\"20\" title=\"enlightened\" alt=\"enlightened\" src=\"http://www.7cups.com/js/ckeditor/plugins/smiley/images/lightbulb.gif\" style=\"max-width:100%;\"></p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "39586", "thread_id": "4049", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/MembersCommunityDiscussionTheFearofJudgement_4049/" }, { "author": "HannahJane", "content": "<p>I am so happy!<br></p>", "parent_ids": [ "39586,nil" ], "post_id": "40312", "thread_id": "4049", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/MembersCommunityDiscussionTheFearofJudgement_4049/" }, { "author": "lucy1983", "content": "<p>I'll come back later with responses to the discussion questions..... boy they make me have to think!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "39587", "thread_id": "4049", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/MembersCommunityDiscussionTheFearofJudgement_4049/" }, { "author": "None", "content": "<p>1. There is a huge difference between moral and character judgment, in my opinion, and I'll try to illustrate what I mean quite simply.<br>- Character Judgment: that person is awkward, lazy, unreliable, ditzy, stupid, flakey, an idiot, freak, weirdo, etc.<br>- Moral Judgment: that person looks like a criminal, I don't trust that person, that person makes me feel unsafe, that person looks like a [sexual or gender orientation in a judgmental tone of voice], I wouldn't sit next to that person, I don't want to be helped by that person, can I have someone else serving me besides that person?, etc.</p>\n<p>2. I'm interpreting \"tired\" as having two different possible meanings here.<br>- \"I'm tired of trying to be what they want, haters gonna hate, screw them.\" I've decided I don't care if people think I look \"like a lesbian\" or \"too much like a (girl/guy)\" or like a nerd or geek or freak. I'm still hurt if someone calls me a slur related to anything like that, but I am what I am, and I've decided I'm tired of trying to pretend to be what I'm not.<br>- \"I'm tired of them saying those things, stop it, please.\" I have a lot of anxiety about being seen as lazy, or untrustworthy, or unreliable, or irresponsible. I'm really worried I'll be judged as a bad employee, or a bad friend, or a bad fiance, or a bad member of my family. I don'twant to be seen as dumb, ditzy, or stupid.</p>\n<p>Those things, when I judge myself, are a combination of not liking some of my personal traits (I'm frequently judged as being awkward - and I am very awkward socially) and traits which I don't want to have and I've worked hard to \"prove\" I'm not (being lazy or stupid).</p>\n<p>3. You can't \"replace\" curiosity with judgment.</p>\n<p>What you can do, in my opinion, is to decide Why you're making that particular judgment, then think Is this fair to be making this (do you have all of the data, are your values the same as theirs, etc), and then decide What can I do with this information?</p>\n<p>If a judgment you have about somebody makes you feel unsafe, you can analyze how you feel and figure out if that feeling is warranted in that situation. If it isn't - you can relax and discard that information. If it is - you can work to get yourself out of that situation.</p>\n<p>If a judgment about yourself is that \"I am being awkward\" - well, if that's the truth, then you can work on skills so you can be less awkward.</p>\n<p>Judgments are just observations connected with an adjective we pull from our brains. Observations are subjective. They are impaired by our inability to know everything and the ineffectiveness our brains process and interpret information.</p>\n<p>Validate what you're thinking. Ask if it's warranted, be aware and wise about your limitations and the reality of the world around you. Then, make your own choice based on what's best for your current goal.</p>\n<p>If your current goal is to be an jerkface, go ahead, tell that person they look dumb and they shouldn't be seen in public.</p>\n<p>If your current goal is to be shopping at a store, then shop. Seriously.</p>\n<p>And for us socially awkward people - if we don't have any reason to think that people believe we're stupid and uninteresting (we're not mindreaders) - then we should work towards our goal. Smile, relax, and have fun with your friends.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "39720", "thread_id": "4049", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/MembersCommunityDiscussionTheFearofJudgement_4049/" }, { "author": "HannahJane", "content": "<p>Amazing Response!<br></p>", "parent_ids": [ "39720,nil" ], "post_id": "40313", "thread_id": "4049", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/SocialAnxiety_247/MembersCommunityDiscussionTheFearofJudgement_4049/" } ]

{ "author": "Evelina2", "content": "my panic attacks has becoming to come back regularly and I'm so worried I'll have one or more the first weeks in a new collage ugh\n", "date": "1407376457", "thread_id": "4120", "title": "Panic attacks", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Panicattacks_4120/" }

[ { "author": "cjbruce", "content": "<p>I've been there. Go see your doctor before you go!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "39080", "thread_id": "4120", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/Panicattacks_4120/" } ]

{ "author": "kittykat", "content": "Wow, I did NOT mean to go so long without posting the next installment in this discussion.  Sorry about that!  This is part two of a listener discussion on anxiety (part one can be found in the forum Lesson 1: Understanding and Overcoming Anxiety). \n\nBefore you reply to this forum, you should complete lessons 1 and 2 in the 7cups guide on Anxiety (https://www.7cups.com/anxiety-help/).\n\nThis discussion centers on anxious thought patterns.  To start off, let's pose a few questions:\n\n1.  Do you ever have trouble coping with anxious thoughts?\n\n2.  How can we identify rational anxiety versus irrational anxiety?\n\n3.  How can we avoid catastrophizing (believing the worst outcome possible will happen)?\n\n4.  How do anxious thoughts impact your day-to-day life personally?\n", "date": "1397235374", "thread_id": "569", "title": "Anxiety Guide Lesson 2: Anxious Thinking", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/Resources_412/AnxietyGuideLesson2AnxiousThinking_569/" }

[ { "author": "Kristey", "content": "<p>I think this thread was made for me:p</p>\n<p>1. Do you ever have trouble coping with anxious thoughts?</p>\n<p>-Yes, 24/7, all the time! It really gets annoying and its hard to deal with</p>\n<p>2. How can we identify rational anxiety versus irrational anxiety?</p>\n<p>- When I was little and I was swimming in a pool that was deep I always go super anxious and scared that there was a shark in the pool, this would be irrational anxiety because there is no way a shark could be in a pool or even survive in a pool!</p>\n<p>Rational anxiety can differ from person to person as so much stuff can effect it like our past. If it is something that scares us, can put us in danger, or hurt us that is rational anxiety, like I said it mainly depends on the person. For me rational anxiety is if I am scared or in danger/about to be hurt then it is perfectly normal to get anxious but when I am in an uncomfortable situation and I get nervous ( even though its not rational anxiety) I get anxious and for me that is rational anxiety because I don't know what is going to happen next.</p>\n<p>3. How can we avoid catastrophizing (believing the worst outcome possible will happen)?</p>\n<p>I have tried every trick in the book for this! again, it depends on the person. If you are in the moment of thinking the worst is going to happen I normally try one of the following</p>\n<p>- deep breathing</p>\n<p>- holding ice or sucking on it</p>\n<p>- talking myself through the situation</p>\n<p>- removing myself from the situation if I need to</p>\n<p>- telling myself everything will be okay, nothing ad will happen, reassuring myself</p>\n<p>- Distract yourself, doodle, watch tv, come on 7 cups!</p>\n<p>If you know you going to go into a situation where you will be anxious like a test then I normally do the following</p>\n<p>- have a talk to myself ( Kristey, everything will be okay, its not the end of the world, just remember to breathe. Nothing bad will happen you will be okay.)</p>\n<p>-Meditate, or listen to calming music</p>\n<p>- sleep! It really helps I promise!</p>\n<p>- chew gum</p>\n<p>- excercise</p>\n<p>- breathe deeply</p>\n<p></p>\n<p>4. How do anxious thoughts impact your day-to-day life personally?</p>\n<p>They impact me to the point where I have to take prescribed medication on a daily basis, and I keep prescribed medication with me where ever I go that I can take when I am having an anxiety attack or feeling it coming and it will calm me down within 5 mins. With that being said I have chronic anxiety that stops me from doing so much in my life, it has been getting better and keeps on improving, it just takes a lot of hard work and dedication to get you anxiety lowered, but it is possible. It can impact my life to the point of me not being able to leave the house, or go out or do certain things because I get thoughts before I even leave the house, so it is hard, but its getting easier each day:)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "5589", "thread_id": "569", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/Resources_412/AnxietyGuideLesson2AnxiousThinking_569/" }, { "author": "Jadie", "content": "<p>I hope this can behelpful even though my dealing with anxious thoughts has been issue-specific!</p>\n<p><span>1. Do you ever have trouble coping with anxious thoughts?</span></p>\n<p>I?ve experienced symptoms of PTSD after my home was broken into last year while I was inside (thankfully no one was hurt!). For awhile after, I had trouble sleeping and concentrating, and I avoided being alone at home at all costs. I even slept with a frying pan by my side for months after! Even though I?m out of that living situation now, I still get nervous when I hear strange noises coming from inside the apartment.</p>\n<p>2. How can we identify rational anxiety versus irrational anxiety?<span></span></p>\n<p>It helps to verbalize our fears to others ? they can really offer comfort by testing the logic behind our thoughts and guiding us past our feelings about certain situations! It can be difficult to let go of revisiting memories and going through every negative outcome possible to \"protect\" ourselves in case it were to happen again, but it's helped me to alter my way ofthinking and to imagine all the reasonswhy the event is NOTlikely to occur again.</p>\n<p>3. How can we avoid catastrophizing (believing the worst outcome possible will happen)?<span></span></p>\n<p>I think it?s important to recognize the moment at which my imagination starts running loose, and stopping my train of thought before that! Again, talking to someone to gainan outside perspective helps. When I had trouble sleeping because of anxious thoughts, I tried breathing techniques (4 seconds inhale, hold for 4, exhale for 4) and deep muscle relaxation to focus my mind ? sometimes it helped, but not always. Distracting myself and going for long walks to really be able to think things out helped too.<span></span></p>\n<p>4. How do anxious thoughts impact your day-to-day life personally?</p>\n<p>Thankfully I don?t deal with this kind of anxiety on a daily basis anymore!Last year though, even though I spent most of my day not at home, it was really difficult to not to bring these anxious thoughts with me, which resulted in a lot of stress, loss of sleep, difficulty concentrating, and eventually burn out. It?s a lot better now that I?m in a new place, and I try to catch myself before letting my mind wander into catastrophic predictions of what could go wrong.</p>\n<p></p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "6013", "thread_id": "569", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/Resources_412/AnxietyGuideLesson2AnxiousThinking_569/" }, { "author": "shinkhouse", "content": "<p>1. Do you ever have trouble coping with anxious thoughts?</p>\n<p>Before I started taking medicine for anxiety, I felt as if I was completely overwhelmed with anxious thoughts. It stressed me out to the point where I was in tears most days. It was hard to shake the thoughts away, I couldn't stop thinking about things. Little things would worry the heck out of me for no reason at all.</p>\n<p>2. How can we identify rational anxiety versus irrational anxiety?</p>\n<p>I've found that talking to someone and saying what my worries are (or what makes me anxious) really helps. It helps to sort of process what is making us anxious and help us get to a point that \"Oh! Maybe I don't need to worry so much about that after all!\"</p>\n<p>3. How can we avoid catastrophizing (believing the worst outcome possible will happen)?</p>\n<p>Personally, I usually just find something to distract myself from those thoughts of terrible outcomes. I often listen to music and sing it out loud, sometimes I'll dance too. :) Some stuff works better than others, I think it's just about what works best for you, then sticking with it.</p>\n<p>4. How do anxious thoughts impact your day-to-day life personally?</p>\n<p>At the time when I was feeling really anxious, I felt overwhelmed and stressed out daily. Being overwhelmed with anxiousness really burnt me out. I managed to get through the summer but by the time school came around and I was back at that, I became even more anxious, to the point where I was crying every day. I finally went to the doctor and was put on anti-anxiety medicine. It helped me alot. :) I've heaard that generally medicine for anxiety (or depression) is hit and miss, sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. You just gotta find something that works for you. I have recently stopped taking medicine for anxiety (and depression). It does get better, you won't be on medicine forever. :)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "14428", "thread_id": "569", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/Resources_412/AnxietyGuideLesson2AnxiousThinking_569/" } ]

{ "author": "kittykat", "content": "Hi!  My name is Kitkat (or Katie if you prefer), and I'm going to be starting a discussion on surviving panic attacks.  This will include ways to help someone having a panic attack, ways to combat panic attacks yourself, and discussions of personal experiences.\n\nBefore we begin this discussion, you should complete the Panic Attacks course, as this has a lot of helpful information.  Here's some information on helping someone having a panic attack, copied and pasted from a topic in the Member Forum:\n\n\"\n\nIf a loved one experiences panic attacks, it's important to know how to support them.  Panic attacks can be very scary from an outside perspective, but the most important thing that you can do for your loved one is to stay calm.  If you start to panic yourself, you'll almost inevitably make their own anxiety worse.  Instead follow these steps to help them:\n\n First you'll have to be able to recognize the situation when it occurs.  Panic attacks have symptoms that closely resemble those of a heart attack or asthma attack.  If this is the first time they've experienced a panic attack, they're at risk for heart or asthma attacks, or they have other detrimental medical conditions, you should seek medical attention.  If they frequently experience panic attacks and are not in danger, let them know what's going on and that you're here to help.\n\nOnly ask the most important questions, as it can be hard for a person having a panic attack to focus clearly.  Don't trivialize their fears or patronize them.  The fear during a panic attack is very real regardless of whether there's anything truly threatening in the immediate area.  Because of this, statements like \"There's nothing to worry about!\" and \"Just calm down!\" are unhelpful and can alienate the person in crisis.\n\nSpeak in a calm voice to guide them through their attack.  Don't touch them unless they've given you permission, as unexpected or unwelcome touches can make an attack worse.  Encourage them to focus on their breathing.  It might be hard for them to take deep breaths at first, so try counting breaths.  Start with a count of 2 (2 in and 2 out) and increase to 4, and then to 6.\n\nAnother breathing technique that helps is breathing out longer than you breathe in.  This helps the body to ascertain that there's no danger, and shuts off the adrenaline gland.\n\nDon't put too much pressure on them and don't overwhelm them.  But unless they ask you to leave, stay with them.  When it comes to surviving panic attacks, there's not a lot to do except wait it out.  Panic attacks usually peak at around ten minutes and then fade.  Smaller anxiety attacks might last longer, but they're more manageable.\"\n\nWith that said, we can open the floor to discuss other ways to overcome panic attacks!  Hopefully this discussion will help us as listeners to grow and learn from each other so that we know more about how to help others.\n\n1.  Have you ever had personal experiences with panic attacks?  (either you or a loved one)\n\n2.  What are some methods a person can use to cope with a panic attack?\n\n3.  What resources have been helpful to you when researching panic attacks?\n\n4.  What are some methods to prevent panic attacks from occurring?\n", "date": "1395518361", "thread_id": "403", "title": "Surviving Panic Attacks", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/SurvivingPanicAttacks_403/" }

[ { "author": "Kristey", "content": "<p>1. Have you ever had personal experiences with panic attacks? (either you or a loved one)</p>\n<p>Yes! I have had personal experiences with them! They not my best friend! I dislike them very much!</p>\n<p>2. What are some methods a person can use to cope with a panic attack?</p>\n<p>There are different ways for a person to cope with a panic attack!</p>\n<p>- deep breathing</p>\n<p>meditating</p>\n<p>-listening to music</p>\n<p>- Taking your mind to another place like the beack and think about the beach think about the 5 senses, what you can smell on the beach, what can you hear etc</p>\n<p>- try telling yourself that everything will be okay!</p>\n<p>3. What resources have been helpful to you when researching panic attacks?</p>\n<p>-youtube</p>\n<p>-friends</p>\n<p>-7 cups of tea!</p>\n<p>- stress ball</p>\n<p>- my bed!</p>\n<p>- TV to distruct myself</p>\n<p>4. What are some methods to prevent panic attacks from occurring?</p>\n<p>you have to know the symtoms of a panic attack first. Youhave to figure out what symptoms you get before the panic attack comes and knowing your symtoms will help you decrease your panic attack before it comes, here are a few of the symptoms</p>\n<p>~~?Palpitations or chest pain<br>?Speeding up of the heart rate<br>?Rapid or over-breathing<br>?Headaches<br>?Backaches<br>?Trembling<br>?Tingling in fingers or toes<br>?Sweating<br>?Dry mouth<br>?Difficulty swallowing<br>?Dizziness/lightheadedness/feeling faintish (this is usually from hyperventilating)<br>?Nausea<br>?Abdominal cramping<br>?Hot flashes or chills<br>Once you feel a panic attack coming you can start to breathe deeply, remove yourself from the situation that may be causing your panic attacks, listen to music and take your mind to some place else</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "3234", "thread_id": "403", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/SurvivingPanicAttacks_403/" }, { "author": "ChandraPrettyPrettyPrincess", "content": "<p>1. Have you ever had personal experiences with panic attacks? (either you or a loved one)</p>\n<p>I have a panic disorder. I was diagnosed in 2002</p>\n<p>2. What are some methods a person can use to cope with a panic attack?</p>\n<p>I use a LOT</p>\n<p><span>~ The rubber band method: Keep a rubber band on your wrist, when you feel a panic attack coming on snap it. The tinge of pain can often times \"snap\" you out of it</span></p>\n<p>~ Smell the rose, blow out the candle. This is a breathing and visualization exercise. you visualize a rose, smell it deeply then blow out the visualized candle.</p>\n<p><span>~ Going Limp! This one works for me all the time when I feel an attack coming on, sitting in a chair, just fall foward onto your lap and let every muscle go limp. You look silly, feel silly and often times this can result in laughter... which kills panic attacks.</span></p>\n<p><span>~ Self Talk during an attack \"This won't last forever\", \"You are not dying\", \"This will end\".</span></p>\n<p><span>~ Ice packs on your skin during an attack. the shock of cold can bring you out of it or give you something to focus on.</span></p>\n<p><span>~Lie flat on a bed or couch during an attack. Start with your toes relaxing them and saying outloud \"toes, I am relaxing my toes\" and do so. \"foot, I am relaxing my foot\", do this until you reach your head, count out individual toes and fingers if need be. By the time you get to your head you are relaxed and the panic attack is generally gone.</span></p>\n<p><span>~MEDITATION, MEDITATION, MEDITATION</span></p>\n<p><span>~ If you are able, SCREAM. Tell the panic attack to EFF off, cuss it, tell it you are in charge. Get ANGRY. Anger will often times replace panic.</span></p>\n<p><span>~soothe yourself. Pull your knees up to your chest and wrap your arms around like a hug. pet your head, shoulders and arms in a soothing manner like you would a child. (I also rock myself when I do this one)</span></p>\n<p>3. What resources have been helpful to you when researching panic attacks?</p>\n<p>The internet mostly.</p>\n<p>4. What are some methods to prevent panic attacks from occurring?</p>\n<p>~ Learn your panic triggers, but don't avoid. Figure out ways to make those situation less panic filled.</p>\n<p>~ Coping skills. There are literally thousands of them all over the internet. Try every single one of them until you find some that work.</p>\n<p>~ Distractions.</p>\n<p>~ Eliminate unneeded stress from your life, which includes toxic people.</p>\n<p>~ Remember that there is not rule book on what is normal behavior. If big parties cause panic attacks and you don't really like them anyway, it is ok not to go to them. As long as you are not avoiding things that are necessary in your life, it's ok to be you.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "3784", "thread_id": "403", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/SurvivingPanicAttacks_403/" }, { "author": "Kristey", "content": "<p>This is such great information! I LOVE that you put down all the ways that can help panic attacks those are such awesome ideas and I am going to try one of them next time!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "3784,nil" ], "post_id": "3815", "thread_id": "403", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/SurvivingPanicAttacks_403/" } ]

{ "author": "kittykat", "content": "Panic attacks are intense and terrifying in and of themselves.  They can be brought on by the most unexpected triggers, and sometimes seemingly nothing triggers them at all.  It's important to know how to manage and survive a panic attack when it does occur.\n\nPanic attacks differ from anxiety attacks.  Anxiety attacks can last for prolonged periods of time and involve feelings of anxiety, shortness of breath, a racing heart, and a racing mind.  Panic attacks are shorter (usually peaking at ten minutes and then fading, sometimes even shorter) and much more intense.  Oftentimes people having a panic attack think that they are having a heart attack, which can make the panic worse.\n\nIt's difficult to think clearly in the midst of a panic attack.  If you experience panic attacks or anxiety attacks, this forum is intended as a support network for you to reach out to others who have shared your experiences.  If you need immediate support, you can connect to a listener.  For more information about panic attacks and surviving them, you can read our help guide (http://www.7cups.com/panic-attacks-help-online/ ).\n\nI'm happy to talk with anybody about their experiences and to offer support if it's needed. :)\n", "date": "1394520267", "thread_id": "87", "title": "On Surviving Panic Attacks", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/OnSurvivingPanicAttacks_87/" }

[ { "author": "Kristey", "content": "<p>to help reduce having panic attacks you need to remember to breath in through your nose and out through your mouth and count while doing it. Another way to help manage your panic attack is to take your brain to another place so for example think of a beach, listen to the waves, feel the sand through your toes, and smell the breeze, That will take your mind of the attack!</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "2171", "thread_id": "87", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/OnSurvivingPanicAttacks_87/" }, { "author": "None", "content": "<p>Thank you for adding this, Kristey! It taught me something! :)</p>", "parent_ids": [ "2171,nil" ], "post_id": "2236", "thread_id": "87", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/OnSurvivingPanicAttacks_87/" }, { "author": "HeartoftheCards", "content": "<p>I've had panic attacks since I was in fifth grade. They always happened at night when I first experienced them, and I seriously thought I was having a heart attack. Not uncommon to feel like that, or like you're losing it or out of control. But I didn't know that back then. Now I'm almost twenty-one, and I have a lot more tricks to make them more tolerable. Sometimes they even shorten them and weaken the intensity. These are a few that I use.</p>\n<p>1.)Pop a peppermint candy into your mouth and just suck on it. Don't bite, I found that the tenseness in your jaw that biting creates isn't good when you are already so tense. Mint has soothing qualities, and it has literally cut the length of my attacks in half. And they are much more tolerable. I always keep a handful in my purse, and always offer them to anxious friends if they need them. A lot of them are skeptecal at first, but when they try it they feel better pretty fast! ;) If you're a guy you can just stick a couple in your pocket.</p>\n<p>2.)One of the awesome older people in my life suggested this after I had a bad attack in school after watching a movie that triggered me. He said what helped his son was that they would sit with him and watch cartoons. This helped him a lot, and I decided to give it a shot. When I got home I was still shaky, so I watched an episode of Rugrats that I had recorded for my siblings. It WORKED. Maybe it was because it made me reminisce about childhood days, or maybe just the light heartedness was enough to divert my attention. But it defenitely worked for me. So, if you can record with your T.V, record a couple cartoons that you enjoy, or even shows from childhood that do re runs. Then the next time you start to feel anxious and panicky, just start playing one. It will divert your attention, and maybe even help you a lot.</p>\n<p></p>\n<p>3.)Aromatherapy can work wonders. I had a lavender set from Bath and Body works that I was very fond of. Body lotion, bubble bath stuff, but the best was the lavender pillow mist! It helped me so much, especially since I tend to get anxious about falling asleep on time. I would spray some all over me pillow, then allow ten to fifteen minutes for it to dry. I got great sleep, anxiety free, almost every time I used it. Lavender is well known for it's soothing properties, and can aid with sleep. I liked using the lotion before I went to school, and anytime I was feeling anxious would put a little on my hands, rub it in, and then let the scent do it's work to make me feel calmer. :)</p>\n<p></p>\n<p>4.)My last trick is one I use frequently for my worst trigger, doctors offices. I HATE them, mostly because I associate them with pain. I get very anxious, and the trick I use is I look at the ceiling, or at the wall in front of me. If there is a pattern, I focus intently on that pattern. The floor is tiled? Fine, I'll count the amount of tiles on the floor. Focusing intently on certain details in patterns or counting tiles on the floor both work equally well for me, keeping me effectively distracted and pretty calm.</p>\n<p></p>\n<p>These are just some of the tricks I have used and still use on a weekly basis whenever I come into contact with triggers. Hopefully it can help someone. ;)</p>\n<p></p>\n<p></p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "2605", "thread_id": "87", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/OnSurvivingPanicAttacks_87/" }, { "author": "Eugene", "content": "<p>Breathing techniques</p>\n<p>The method of breathing isimportant. Adults on average breaths 15-20 times a minute more than they are suppose to do. This is because we don'tbreathe deep enough. Because of this faster breathing it triggers your body?s adrenal glands to produce morecortisolbecause the body relates faster breathing with fight or flight scenarios. These stress hormonesin turn increases anxiety, heart rate and many other anxiety symptoms.</p>\n<p>Now that we examined the tempo/deepness of breathing let?s talk about which method of breathing is best for deep breathing.There are generally two methods of breathing, i.e. the chest expanding one and the stomach/diaphragmatic one. Thediaphragmaticone, i.e. breathing through your stomach fills the lungs with more oxygen.In other words with diaphragmatic breathing you fill the lungs with more oxygen which in turn helps to decrease the tempo of breathing.</p>\n<p>Thirdly we have the option to breathe through our nose or mouth. Unfortunately most people in the west breathe through their mouths which have many disadvantages. Your brain associate mouth breathing withexertionand and some cases this increases stress hormones. The brain thinks you are losing carbon dioxide too quickly. Nose breathing also increases resistance to the nasal air stream which in turn increases the elasticity of the lungs. Breathing through the nose also many other benefits like greater resistance to colds and allergies.</p>\n<p>To sum up breathing techniques:</p>\n<p>1. Take fewer breaths by breathing deeper instead of high tempo shallow breathing.</p>\n<p>2. Breathe through your stomach i.e. diaphragmatic breathing.</p>\n<p>3. Breathe through your nose.</p>\n<p></p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "2980", "thread_id": "87", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/OnSurvivingPanicAttacks_87/" }, { "author": "Kristey", "content": "<p>Great information Eugene! Thank you!<br></p>", "parent_ids": [ "2980,nil" ], "post_id": "3161", "thread_id": "87", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/PanicAttacks_49/OnSurvivingPanicAttacks_87/" } ]

{ "author": "kittykat", "content": "Hello all!  I am going to be leading an ongoing study and discussion in anxiety so that we can better help our members (and ourselves if we struggle with anxiety).  First off, I'd like to recommend that people peruse the 7cups help guide on managing anxiety, because it's actually very helpful!  This lesson and discussion will focus mostly on the first lesson in the anxiety guide, which is about the symptoms of anxiety and how to manage anxiety.\n\nTo kick off the discussion, I'll post a few questions for people to think about and answer.  From here, we can talk about ways to manage and overcome anxiety.  (I'll also answer these questions myself in an additional post on this thread, so I can keep my answers and this intro post separate.)\n\n1.  What purpose does stress serve in our daily lives?\n\n2.  Where do we draw the lines between rational stress and irrational anxiety?\n\n3.  Has stress ever been a negative influence in your life?\n\n4.  Has stress ever been a positive influence in your life?\n\n5.  When does self-care become a priority over productivity?\n\n6.  If we've identified the anxiety we're feeling as irrational, how can we change the root of our thoughts and behaviors to diminish the fear?\n", "date": "1395135638", "thread_id": "359", "title": "Anxiety Guide Lesson 1: Understanding and Overcoming Anxiety", "topic": "anxiety", "url": "/forum/anxiety/Resources_412/AnxietyGuideLesson1UnderstandingandOvercomingAnxiety_359/" }

[ { "author": "kittykat", "content": "<p>1. What purpose does stress serve in our daily lives?</p>\n<p>Stress reminds us of the tasks that need doing and the pressure we have on us to finish. It's our body's way of keeping ourselves safe. But sometimes stress becomes too much, or becomes irrational.</p>\n<p>2. Where do we draw the lines between rational stress and irrational anxiety?</p>\n<p>For me, rational stress is stress that helps me to be productive. For example, I know I have a blog overdue to get to Laura, and that's a bit of a stressor right now :P But that's a good stressor! It reminds me that I have to get things done.</p>\n<p>Irrational anxiety, meanwhile, isn't helpful at all. It's either so overwhelming that it paralyzes us (keeping us from being productive at all), it exists over situations we cannot control, it exists for no identifiable purpose at all, or the amount of anxiety we feel is disproportionate to the threat of the situation.</p>\n<p>3. Has stress ever been a negative influence in your life?</p>\n<p>I have mild social anxiety, as well as generalized anxiety disorder (GAD). Because of these, stress is almost constantly a negative influence in my life. I am constantly blowing situations out of proportion and feeling fears that make no sense. For example, I am terrified talking on the phone. This fear makes no sense!! There's no immediate danger, there's nothing threatening me. But the idea of speaking to somebody through the phone scares me so much that it's paralyzing. And this has unfortunately inhibited my life in a lot of ways.</p>\n<p>This is just one example of many. I've gotten good at identifying irrational anxiety over the years. In short, I consider my anxiety to be irrational when it does more harm in my life than good.</p>\n<p>4. Has stress ever been a positive influence in your life?</p>\n<p>Well, it's stress that's going to get me to write that blog and send it over to Laura...</p>\n<p>5. When does selfcare become a priority over productivity?</p>\n<p>I think that selfcare always needs to be a priority. We need to be our best selves before we can do our best work. However, not everyone has the ability to call in sick to work or school because they need a self care day. The world goes on even if we're struggling.</p>\n<p>Because of this, I think it's important to know techniques to manage anxiety. Living with anxiety is a constant uphill battle. Taking care of ourselves is important, but we shouldn't stop our lives entirely. Moving forward is often exactly what we need to combat our anxiety! But we can also reach out in places like 7cups when we need to vent, learn more about our own thoughts and triggers, and become self-aware enough to change the thoughts at the root.</p>\n<p>6. If we've identified the anxiety we're feeling as irrational, how can we change the root of our thoughts and behaviors to diminish the fear?</p>\n<p>The anxiety guide talks about this! The first strategy, and most effective for me, is<strong>cognitive restructuring. </strong>This is when we take a moment to evaluate the situation and the danger. When talking to a member about anxiety they're feeling, ask the following questions as they're appropriate (different situations merit different questions):</p>\n<p>What is the most likely outcome of this situation?</p>\n<p>What is the root of your fear?</p>\n<p>How is your anxiety helping you to be productive?</p>\n<p>What is the most immediate threat or danger in your situation?</p>\n<p>Another note - when asking members questions, try to avoid questions that can be answered with a simple yes or no. You want to get the member to think past their anxiety and recognize the true level of danger they are or aren't in.</p>\n<p>The second strategy is <strong>relaxation training</strong>. One thing I always tell members experiencing anxiety to do is to take deep breaths. Once they've controlled their breathing and are not in danger of hyperventilating, I tell them to breathe in for a count of 7 and out for 11. Breathing out longer than you breathe in sends a message to your body, saying, \"I am safe, I am not in danger.\" Subsequently, your body shuts off your adrenaline. It's a relaxation technique I use whenever I get scared or anxious, and it's really effective!</p>\n<p>The third strategy is<strong>overcoming avoidance. </strong>In an anxiety-inducing situation, our first instinct might be to escape the situation. If a homework assignment is causing stress, we might skip it entirely. If a coworker is causing stress, we might avoid them. Avoiding situations that make you anxious can help you feel better initially, but the dread still remains.</p>\n<p>If possible, try exposing yourself to the situation in small doses. Just a few problems at a time on that homework assignment, just a few passing words with your coworker. And don't be afraid to ask for help from others if you need it!</p>\n<p>The fourth strategy is<strong>medication. </strong>The medications that a person chooses to use are entirely up to them, and we cannot make a person's medical decisions for them. That is between them and their doctor; they know what is best for them. For some people, anti-anxiety medications can help correct a chemical imbalance in the brain. I take antidepressants/anti-anxiety medicine for this reason, and it's very helpful for me! But each person's journey is up to them.</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "2643", "thread_id": "359", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/Resources_412/AnxietyGuideLesson1UnderstandingandOvercomingAnxiety_359/" }, { "author": "Kristey", "content": "<p>all of my answers are just opinons!</p>\n<p>~~<br>1. What purpose does stress serve in our daily lives?</p>\n<p>Stress can be good for us in small doses, stress can help us get a specific task done! however to much stress can cause anxiety and then we will freak out which will add more stress</p>\n<p>2. Where do we draw the lines between rational stress and irrational anxiety?</p>\n<p>rational stress is more across the lines of\" I am stressed because I have a huge project due in two days\" That is a good stress because it is going to motivate you to get your project done. Irrational anxiety is something you worry about that is not at all supposed to worry about and its more across the lines of being silly for example my irrational anxiety is running out of pens, it is something very irrational and something I should not be worried about but I will always have atleast 5 pens with me at a time!</p>\n<p>3. Has stress ever been a negative influence in your life?</p>\n<p>Oh yes! I become a stress ball super easy. I stress over very small things as well as big things.I have gotten to the point where I had to take a week of school and just do nothing to calm my body down.Some weeks it gets really bad where my whole body stiffens up and I can hardly move and almost in tears by all the knots that I gainthen I have to go get a massage! ( no complaining there)I still get stressed easy and I have to learn to use different methods to help my stress.</p>\n<p>4. Has stress ever been a positive influence in your life?</p>\n<p>Yes! I procrastinate more then I should lol! so when it comes down to getting things done stress has always helped me get it done faster!</p>\n<p>5. When does self-care become a priority over productivity?</p>\n<p>Self care becomes a priority when you see yourself decreasing, falling into depression, getting more anxious etc! we need to find a stable amount of time we spend on self care! We need to make sure we okay before we can do anything because if we not okay we going to battleto get anything done!</p>\n<p>6. If we've identified the anxiety we're feeling as irrational, how can we change the root of our thoughts and behaviors to diminish the fear?</p>\n<p>Depending on how bad the anxiety is I would say you can do one of the following!</p>\n<p>1) connect to one of 7 cups amazing listeners!</p>\n<p>2) seek support from your friends or family</p>\n<p>3) start asking yourself questions as to why you getting anxious over certain things</p>\n<p>4) seek therapy</p>\n<p>5) See a doctor about going on prescribed medication</p>", "parent_ids": [ "nil" ], "post_id": "2703", "thread_id": "359", "url": "https://www.7cups.com/forum/anxiety/Resources_412/AnxietyGuideLesson1UnderstandingandOvercomingAnxiety_359/" } ]