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coinciding with the emerging popularity of movies that deal with anything related to serial killers , relentless , 1989 low budget thriller about lapd detective sam dietz , played by character actor leo rossi , spawned three more sequels .
relentless 3 , third in the row , features sam dietz again , but this time detective , who had to catch vicious serial killer in his very first case , doesn't want to deal with similar line of work .
divorced , demoralised and transferred , he reluctantly returns to his old post when los angeles becomes a hunting ground for another serial killer , and evidence indicate connection with one of dietz's old cases .
to make things even more interesting , it seems that the killer deliberately stages murders in order to bring dietz to the investigation .
fans of the british tv films and mini-series like prime suspect or cracker would probably see a lot of similarities relentless series of movies .
they both feature vicious psychopathic killers , yet also give a lot of , usually depressive , details about chief investigator's private lives .
this one isn't an exception , but similarities with british television are only in content .
the execution and style is different , which makes this film mediocre piece of entertainment at best .
useless , gratuitous erotica also doesn't help either , obviously making this film longer than it should be .
the actors are good , though - leo rossi is fine as usual , and william forsythe plays one of more compelling villains in his career .
signy coleman as dietz's love interest , is , on the other hand , quite miscast .
but she won't have to worry about it in the future career , since relentless 3 wasn't supposed to be anybody's finest moment anyway .
| neg | Negative |
some critics , including siskel & ebert , are on the record stating that martin scorsese's raging bull , the story of boxer jake la motta , is the best film of the '80s .
since there are still a number of '80s films that i haven't seen , i don't feel qualified to make such a judgment , but i'll say this without hesitation : raging bull is a great motion picture , and i would be surprised if more than a handful of films released between january 1 , 1980 and december 31 , 1989 come close to its level .
bio-pics often fall into one of two categories : overblown hero- worship or a dry , dull textbook account .
it's rare that a movie with the moniker " based on the life of ? " comes across as anything more than sporadically energetic and marginally entertaining .
raging bull is the perfect counterexample , and a brilliant argument for film makers to continue to work in this genre .
the picture takes the life of boxer jake la motta , a middleweight icon from the '40s and '50s , and develops one of the most compelling character studies ever to reach the big screen .
for all 129 minutes , director martin scorsese and actor robert de niro ( in the title role ) have us mesmerized by this individual who is by turns sympathetic , sad , and horrifying .
historically , raging bull is said to be mostly accurately , with the lion's share of the details culled from la motta's own autobiography ( which was co-written with joseph carter and peter savage ) .
however , although la motta is credited as the movie's " consultant , " he was reportedly unhappy with the final result , because it portrays him as nothing short of an uncouth , insensitive lout .
the la motta of the movie is a man of extreme appetites who is driven by base , bestial impulses ? paranoia , jealousy , and blind rage .
sex and violence are inextricably linked .
the title is apt ? la motta is a raging bull .
in the ring , he is a terror , not just beating his opponents , but destroying them .
outside of it , he is no less vicious or more easily controlled .
the two people who spar with him on life's canvas are his wife , vicki ( cathy moriarty ) , and his brother/manager , joey ( joe pesci ) .
these are the two who mean the most to jake , and who , as a result of his inability to trust himself or others , he loses .
he beats vicki mercilessly because he suspects her of infidelity , and , when he inaccurately believes that his brother betrayed him , his lets loose with an explosion of violence .
raging bull opens in 1941 when la motta , an up-and-coming fighter , is battling his way into the upper echelon of the middleweight class .
over the years , he wins several key bouts , including one against his arch-rival , sugar ray robinson ( johnny barnes ) , but his unwillingness to capitulate with the local godfather keeps him from an opportunity to participate in a championship match .
meanwhile , away from the ring , la motta falls in love with 15-year old vicki , who he marries after discarding his shrewish first wife .
vicki becomes jake's greatest prize ( a wife , in his view , is not a companion , but a possession ) and the source of his most extreme pain .
his own insecurity is so great that he cannot accept that a woman as beautiful as vicki could be faithful to him .
hence , he is constantly haunted by a belief that she is sleeping with someone else ? perhaps even his brother .
( this leads to the famous line parodied in waiting for guffman and elsewhere : " are you f * * king my wife ? ? ? " )
in the late '40s , la motta gets his first shot at a championship fight , but with one huge condition : he must take a fall .
he does it so badly that an investigation is launched and he is almost thrown out of boxing .
two years later , he wins the championship , only to lose it in a subsequent bout to sugar ray .
by the late '50s and early '60s , when the film ends , jake has become a pathetic figure ? a broke , overweight loser who has spent time in jail for corrupting the morals of a minor , has lost his wife and children , and is trying to earn a few bucks by doing a cheap standup routine .
raging bull is the other side of rocky .
sylvester stallone's tale of boxing triumph was released to great critical acclaim in 1976 .
it won the 1977 best picture oscar , and a sequel arrived in theaters before raging bull went into production .
but , where rocky romanticizes boxing , raging bull takes a cold , unflinching look at the violence both inside and outside of the ring .
while scorsese's primary aim is to present a riveting deconstruction of la motta the man , he never backs away from showing the seedy , ugly underside of a sport where gambling , greed , and organized crime force fighters to throw matches to continue working .
rocky shows boxing at its noblest ; raging bull shows it at its most diseased .
there's little i can say here that hasn't already said about de niro's performance .
in a career that has included many fine roles , this is his most outstanding .
the level of intensity de niro brings to la motta is unwavering .
and , although there's a lot of travis bickle ( de niro's character in taxi driver ) in la motta , scorsese and de niro go to great lengths to make sure that , if we never fully sympathize with him , at least we understand the forces that drive him .
this is a complete characterization and a perfect example of acting .
as the younger jake , de niro is trim and fit .
as the fat , older man , de niro gained 50 pounds and turned his body into a grotesque parody of its normal form .
how many actors would go that far ?
the best oscar statue is only one testimony to the lasting power of the performance .
cathy moriarty and joe pesci both earned nominations for their supporting work ( although neither won ) .
their portrayals have the same raw energy that infuses de niro's .
pesci , who has basically re-created the same personality in two other scorsese films ( goodfellas and casino ) , presents joey as a slightly more intelligent version of his brother .
the misogyny and violence are still there , only better concealed .
but , when joey snaps , as he does in one scene where he pounds on a mobster ( frank vincent ) , it's startling to behold .
moriarty , on the other hand , must play the temptress with virginal qualities ? the only kind of woman who would ensnare jake .
later , she's called upon to portray the battered wife and mother whose love has turned into fear .
scorsese and cinematographer michael chapman elected to shoot the bulk of raging bull in black-and-white ( a few " home movie " segments are in color ) .
the choice is perfect for the movie , giving raging bull a unique look in an era when a black-and-white approach is almost unheard of .
( one important recent exception , schindler's list , eschewed color for some of the same reasons that raging bull did . )
in black-and-white ( especially considering scorsese's choice of shots and use of slow motion ) , the violence is stark and disturbing .
there's no room for romanticism in the ring with inky black blood staining the canvas .
during fight sequences , the director also uses a number of point-of-view shots designed to show the world , however briefly , from la motta's perspective .
scorsese could have chosen to end the film with la motta's loss to sugar ray , where he surrendered his middleweight crown .
after that , his career was all downhill .
yet the director allows the film to run for thirty minutes after this pivotal moment , stretching more than a decade into la motta's future .
the reason is obvious : scorsese isn't as interested in boxing as he is in the character .
following his retirement , la motta is still as violent and volatile as ever , but he has lost the arena in which he can legally unleash those tendencies .
we see the results of this beast let loose on society and how the consequences of his actions reduce him to a parody of his former self .
who cannot feel a surge of pity for la motta as he quietly recites marlon brando's speech from on the waterfront ?
( " i coulda been a contenda . " )
perhaps raging bull is indeed the best film of the '80s .
and , if not , it's certainly perilously close to the zenith .
| pos | Negative |
the thirteenth floor , the third in what i would call " the reality check movie series " , is very similar to the other reality check movies released this year , the matrix and existenz .
all three made you think , made you wonder what is real , what isn't , and if our world is just a huge game .
the thirteenth floor doesn't reach the level of originality , creativity , and curiosity sparked by the matrix and existenz , but it certainly gives a great shot at it .
in the matrix , we were told that the humans are simply a virus .
in existenz , we learned that our life could be just a game .
in the thirteenth floor , we learn that we are just electronic devices , living under another world of electronic devices .
there is just one world on top of another , and everything in them are fake and electronically generated .
the thirteenth floor took a huge , risky turn that i didn't expect it to take , and i'm not very sure it was such a great turn to make .
rather than focusing just on the reality parts of the film , the thirteenth floor becomes a murder mystery that ends up tying in with the different worlds .
after the mysterious murder of computer program designer hammond fuller , played by armin mueller-stahl , douglas hall , played by craig bierko , a man that worked under fuller for many years , must travel through an electronic computer device that fuller was using , to the year 1937 , which consists of computer generated characters only .
the simulation of 1937 is just like it was back in the olden days .
all of the people involved are just characters , or are they ?
douglas strongly believes that a character traveled through the transport from their world to ours , and killed fuller .
along the way , douglas interacts with many different potential suspects , and a woman who claims to be the daughter of fuller , jane fuller , played wonderfully by a talented young actress , gretchen mol .
the thirteenth floor is a plot driven movie from the time the film gets going , and doesn't use spectacular special effects and big sound to keep the viewer's interests .
i was worried that this film would be too much like the matrix and existenz , and i wouldn't enjoy it , but there were enough twists and turns to keep me thinking and attentive to the film .
unfortunately , many potential would have been great scenes were thrown away with predictable content , letting the viewer know the outcome of the scene long before it happened .
the scenes that aren't original or interesting seem to go absolutely nowhere , leaving you wondering , " what is the point of this ? "
sometimes it was hard to believe that this story , with terrible dialogue , some bad acting , especially from craig bierko , and scenes that go absolutely nowhere , are actually true .
i know this isn't a true story or anything , but a film should be able to make you think that it is .
on the plus side of acting , we get to see the missing from main character action since the film masterpiece shine in 1995 actor , armin mueller-stahl .
in the thirteenth floor , he is back and is still giving believable and amazing performances .
another plus is gretchen mol's realistic performance , creating her character with depth , not just staying in the one-dimensional phase .
don't expect the intensity of the matrix or existenz to come out of the thirteenth floor , just expect another film that messes with your mind for awhile , and shuts you down like any other movie would .
thrills , chills , and spills aren't what you will get in this film , but you will just get another trip to send your mind on , scrambling it until you've had enough .
the bottom line- let's hope this is the last of the " reality check " based movies for awhile .
| pos | Positive |
'lake placid' is definately not your typical creature attacking people movie , ok so maybe it is , but this one is enjoyable , and clever .
actually it comes off more of a comedy than a horror film .
well the ending is kinda scary , but in most horror/comedies they are .
i will admit that 'lake placid' isn't an oscar worthy film , but it does come off as an inventive movie that is original and funny .
bridget fonda plays a palentologist who after finding out her boyfriend is cheating , is forced to go to lake placid and investigate a tooth , after a man is bit in half .
she gets there but really doesn't understand why she is there .
bill pullman plays a man also investigating what happened , along with the sherriff and a rich croc obsessed man , they go out and find what is going on .
what they find though isn't great .
a huge and i mean huge crocodile is living in lake placid , over 150 years old , he has migrated here for who knows why .
they have to fight against the croc and try to trap him so they can study him and see where he came from .
betty white plays a woman who lives on the shores of lake placid , and well you'll have to see the movie to find out .
her character is very funny and foul-mouthed , which is surprising to hear betty spew words and phrases that are pretty bad , but funny .
to me the movie came off as a spoof of jaws .
with the opening sequence , and some others , it is not original and is .
when you watch this movie , you definately notice the smartness and cleverness of it .
david e . kelly who is the mastermind of the practice and ally mcbeal , writes this movie with ease and surprisingly does a great job .
the characters have smartmouths , two foul , and some great one-liners .
but believe me , don't take 'lake placid' too seriously or you won't like it .
but it is a movie that can be enjoyed as a fun 'popcorn' type movie .
but i guess it rates above the 'popcorn' rating .
sit back , watch the movie , laugh , scream , and whatever you want .
even though the movie is r , and i put violence and gore .
there's really not that much gore , but what there is might seem kinda gross to some .
'lake placid' is a smart , clever , funny , and scary movie that i enjoyed and i think you will too .
| pos | Positive |
here is a movie that sadly follows the hong kong-recipe of moviemaking and storytelling to the letter .
these kinds of movies are marked by an eye-opening sequence that introduces us to the main characters ; a life-and-death plot in which these characters become involved ; the inclusion of a host of inconsequential characters ; ridiculous subplots , and sunglass-wearing henchmen .
that is not to say that i don't like hong kong influenced movies ; however , it is quite obvious that these moviemakers haven't a clue that the american filmgoer needs more than hip-hop-talking thugs and stupid sight gags .
observe the opening sequence .
a band of hitmen are about to storm an apartment , led by melvin ( mark wahlberg ) and cisco ( lou diamond phillips ) .
they are waiting for their partner to cut off the power so that they can storm the apartment with the help of infrared goggles .
however , their partner is unsure of which cable to cut .
he is undecided .
this happens for about 10 seconds .
the audience finds some humor in his foolishness .
the lights suddenly go out .
cisco is surprised and says : " whoa . . . let's
go ! "
and they storm the apartment in a very nicely executed sequence .
the big hit of the title refers to a kidnapping that happens a quarter of the way through the film .
needing cash , cisco devises a plan to kidnap the daughter ( china chow ) of wealthy japanese industrialist jiro nishi .
however , the daughter is also the god-daughter of paris ( avery brooks ) , who is cisco's and melvin's boss .
infuriated and insufferable , paris commands cisco to uncover the mastermind of the kidnapping .
during his 'investigation' , cisco singles out melvin as the ringleader , and paris orders his capture and execution .
melvin must now find a way to stay alive .
by the way , do you know how the investigation takes place ?
cisco's partner makes the ransom phone call believing that his call will not be traced because of a trace buster that prevents tracing .
but , mr . nishi has a trace buster buster .
to counter that , cisco's partner has a trace buster buster buster .
but nishi has a trace buster buster buster buster .
and so on . . .
there is no doubt that this is an interesting world in which they live .
and there are lots of issues that we'd like to know more about .
how does melvin justify his profession to his fiancee ?
what goes on among this clique ?
why is cisco at odds with melvin ?
there is actually a lot of potential material that could have been explored , but it seems that no effort is made to go in that direction , and instead we are given a not-so-engrossing plot filled with one-liners , silly sight gags , extraneous sub-plots and tomfoolery .
and , i haven't even mentioned his financee's visiting parents who want them to separate , nor melvin's mistress , nor the pimple-faced video clerk demanding the return of an overdue video and on and on and on .
if the big hit signals the future of hong kong style movies that are made for american audiences , then shoot me now .
| neg | Negative |
as fairy tales go , cinderella has to be one of the most famous .
almost everyone knows it , well at least in north america .
so it is natural that someone will try to make a movie out of it .
it has been done before with varying results .
this version of the story is both similar to the original and different at the same time .
the basic story remains unchanged but , one thing that seems to vanish with this version , and that is all the fantastical elements of the story .
there is no fairy god mother or anything even remotely of that nature .
after the fantastical elements are stripped away what is left is a realistic believable rendition of the cinderella story and an interesting love story at the least .
.
unlike in the fairy tale , the prince plays a much larger part than just that of the masked ball at the end .
the ? prince' , who happens to be the crown prince to the throne of france , meets 'cinderella' , known as danielle , on a few occasions , most coincidentally and he becomes smitten with her .
although this seems to be a far cry from the traditional story it allows for the main plot to proceed with enough room for some imaginative story telling . .
the story takes place in a renaissance setting ; in france , with leonardo da vinci providing some comic relief on more than one occasion .
this addition of leonardo da vinci , was quite successful in that it added some color to the movie , since some of the roles are a bit stereotypical .
for example the role that was scripted for the prince leaves a few things to be desired .
for instance the character seems to be a bit too unstable and fickle , a crown prince should not be anything remotely like that .
especially since he is portrayed to be in his mid twenties at the least and almost ready to take the throne .
the characters of danielle ( cinderella ) played by drew barrymore , and that of the evil step mother , played by anjelica huston , are well developed and well played by the two women .
although the part of danielle is a bit stretched it is not too unlikely and not totally unbelievable .
the nuances of the character are brought out well by drew barrymore and from watching the movie it seems like she had fun making the movie .
as a contrast the part of the evil step mother is clearly seen from the very beginning and is almost clique .
but , anjelica huston seems to add a certain flair to the role that makes it suit the movie nearly perfectly .
the actual story is fairly predictable since it is after all the basic story of cinderella , but there are more than enough twists in how the story is told to make it interesting and enjoyable .
the acting is of high caliber and seems deserved of praise .
all in all this movie takes you back into history , into a seemingly magical fairy land .
but , don't get me wrong there is nothing but reality , it is just refreshing to watch a movie that is not based in a familiar setting with everyday familiar things happening .
so although the story is basically familiar the world it is set in is not , and that adds a dimension to the film which in this humble reviewers opinion makes it worth seeing
| pos | Positive |
i have a soft spot in my heart for pure , amoral sleaze .
i liked showgirls ( there , i said it ) .
i typically enjoy myself when sitting through that eszterhaz , sex-filled cinematic tabloid-ish trash .
wild things is the best sleazy film i've ever seen .
it's filled with great performances , graphic sex , three-way sex , rape charges , double-crosses , plot twists , genitalia of all genders , graphic violence , death , witty humor , and , best of all , denise richards .
criticizing this film for being disgusting , raucous , and just plain wrong is as fundamentally pointless as criticizing citizen kane for being disturbing , or titanic for being lofty and epic .
wild things is a film that succeeds in its endeavors , but i don't just admire it for this--i admire it for being so entertaining and such a fun time at the movies .
i must admit up-front , however , that i am directly in the center of the age group to which this film has been engineered to appeal .
i imagine that this shows .
it's hard to give a plot summary without giving away pieces that shouldn't be known .
i thought i had the whole thing worked out from the trailer , but i was wrong ; there are a lot of turns here .
i'll just say that the film takes place in blue bay , a rich little town in florida .
in blue bay lives sam lombardo ( matt dillon ) , a teacher who is accused of rape by two of his students , kelly van ryan ( denise richards ) , and suzie toller ( neve campbell ) .
kelly's mother , sandra ( theresa russell ) , immediately presses charges .
all of this happens fairly early in the film .
and right up until this point , i had the whole film predicted .
i was wrong , though , and every time i was proven wrong , i was shocked .
wild things isn't even remotely plausible , but it is so fun to see where the story takes us that the implausibility of every scene is meaningless , and often invited , just for kicks .
i remember first seeing the preview for wild things before the replacement killers .
i'd give the preview four stars .
it made me want to see the movie so much that i've been waiting for it anxiously ever since .
over the past few weeks though , i started to realize that there was no way the film could live up to the preview ( see independence day ) ; thankfully , i was proven wrong .
the preview for this film is one that needs to be studied by marketing analysts of every distribution company : not only does it make us want to see the film , but it doesn't give away any of the secrets .
but i'm not here to talk about the preview .
i'm here to talk about denise richards .
now , i found her mildly interesting in starship troopers , but in wild things she appeals to such a base instinct that every scene she's in demands attention in a way that almost no other performer can .
of course , this might have something to do with her oceanic eyes . . . and
flawless body . . . but
i thought she did a great job acting , too ( stop laughing ) .
no , richards is truly a find--she is talented , and always convincing in this film .
this mixed in with her insane physical appeal makes her a vital asset to any film she may grace in the future .
the other actors are good , too .
dillon is as suave as ever ( it's nice to see him bouncing back from albino alligator and in & out ) .
bacon does a good job acting all determined and stuff as a sex crimes officer .
neve campbell gives the most layered performance of all of them , though i won't pretend that any of these characters are deep and complex .
for a plot like this to work , all of these people have to be insane and basically contrived .
that's okay , because director john mcnaughton knows that he's making a self-consciously wicked film .
each scene--even the three-way sex scene--is observed with hilarity by mcnaughton , and the result is a sleaze-fest that's too smart to resist .
there isn't an inconsistent moment in wild things : every bit of it is alluring garbage , so trashy it's funny , and so entertaining it's painful .
i loved it .
| pos | Positive |
well i'll be damned , what a most excellent surprise .
not to be confused with the campy and far inferior 1988 remake starring ex-porn star traci lords , this more recent attempt at remaking the 1950's drive-in schlockfest not of this earth is a real gem and was quite possibly the best sci-fi flick of 1995 .
once again , b-movie king roger corman is behind this effort ( he directed the original ) but this time he appears only in the role of executive producer .
the rest of the crew and cast are relative unknowns .
it seems criminal that the film was released direct to video in most countries , because it's an absolute must-see for sci-fi fans and a treat for anyone who enjoys decently acted and written thrillers with a kooky bent .
the plot in brief .
paul johnson ( michael york ) is an alien posing as an eccentric millionaire who , though needing to kill people to live , is visiting earth for far from selfish reasons .
his race is dying of a mysterious blood disease and he desperately is trying to find a cure , the key of which lies in the blood of humans .
he visits and soon puts under his spell the respected blood physician dr . rochelle , whom he hypnotises into doing secret research on his behalf .
he also has the doctor convince smart and sexy nurse amanda ( elizabeth barondes ) to move in with johnson as his private nurse so as to give him the blood transfusions which he constantly requires .
but before long , amanda and johnson's sleazy chauffeur release that johnson is a lot more than just eccentric .
i must admit , my first glimpse of the video cover for not of this earth was not encouraging .
british actor michael york has appeared in some real stinkers in past few decades , a far cry from the quality fare of his younger days such as caberat ( 1972 ) .
but his performance here as an alien in human disguise is nothing short of outstanding .
the weird twitches and bizarre modes of speech , the dapper clothes and cool spectacles , the unexpected pathos which he invests in his character .
york is by turns hilarious , menacing and tragic .
this is a tour-de-force and quite simply the best performance i've seen from him .
and while obviously made on a modest budget , the film boasts enormous strengths .
the casting is spot on , the acting is terrific and the script is intelligent , witty and consistently engaging , cleverly updating the original .
the balance of horror and humour is just about perfect , a marked contrast to the earlier remake from 1988 .
the film doesn't drag for a second of its 90 minute running time thanks to tight editing and the sure hand of little-known director terrance h . winkless .
and it doesn't matter one bit that the special effects are cheesy - this is schlock after all , even if it is high class schlock .
in fact my only criticism of the film is that things get a tad weak towards the end .
tighter direction could have given the climax more urgency and a few of the characters act rather illogically given their life-threatening situation .
but these are minor complaints .
just see it .
not of this earth is one of the biggest sci-fi surprises in years .
and michael york : in one cool swoop you've made yourself a b-movie legend , dude .
| pos | Positive |
with storytelling this compelling , who needs books ?
based on the book by author james ellroy , l . a . confidential is probably one of the best piece of work produced by hollywood in recent years .
together with director curtis hanson ( the hand that rocks the cradle , the river wild ) whom ellroy corroborated closely throughout the shooting of the film , resulted in a movie with a plot and and script so tight , an atom would have to squeeze itself through .
set in the 50s , the story revolves around 3 policemen of vivid personalities .
jack vincennes ( spacey ) is the cop who is more concerned on busting with fame and stardom ala hollywood style , concentrating heavily on work which will attract him media attention .
there is also the young hot-shot rookie , ed exley ( pearce ) , fresh out of the academy and all-out to carve a name for himself in the footsteps of his legendary cop father .
the tough and unnerving bud white ( crowe ) , a cop who believes in justice , the swift and violent way .
3 policemen , distinct in their characters and paths but all of them working in a place where there is no real distinction between good and evil .
when his partner is murdered on the day of his resignation , bud sets out to find the people responsible but unwittingly delved himself into something more than just a simple robbery murder .
even after exley receives a promotion for his work on the murder case , happenings began to link itself to the murder .
the 3 eventually reach a point of convergence when what actually began as a personal investigation turns out to be an uncovering of a complex web of organised-crime in hollywood .
the last time i remember a film so clever and compelling was when i watched the usual suspects .
in l . a . confidential , you do not get the shock and cleverness as the former but it has a lot more of `story' going for it .
there is not a single moment in the film in which i felt was slow at all .
surprisingly , though spacey did a very convincing job as the street-wise vincennes , the movie was carried mostly by the two rather `unknowns' , pearce and crowe .
pearce's exley is cool and calculative in his actions and there is a slight hint of val kilmer in his appearance .
crowe's bud white is the most impressive of all ; head-strong and temperamental , he should obtain some sort of recognition for his work here .
superb acting . , wonderful storytelling and one of the best climaxing gunfights ever .
easily the best hollywood piece for 1997 .
| pos | Positive |
an unhappy italian housewife , a lonely waiter , a goofy masseuse , lots of love , and gorgeous scenery all come together in bread and tulips , which proves charming despite its covering of predictable , well-worn material .
the story concerns the aforementioned housewife , rosalba barletta ( licia maglietta ) who accidentally becomes separated from her immediate family while on vacation .
instead of waiting for a ride home , rosalba opts not to go home to her italian town , but to instead hitchhike to venice .
upon arriving , she tells her self-centered husband , mimmo ( an excellent antonio catania ) that she'll be home in a few days .
of course , that doesn't happen , as rosalba quickly gains a level of independence that has been unattainable in her past life of scrubbing floors and buying groceries .
in what seems like days , she moves in with lonely , suicidal waiter fernando ( bruno ganz ) , gets a job as a florist , learns the accordion , and befriends her neighbor -- a wacky holistic masseuse named grazia ( marina massironi ) .
rosalba , who is first seen wearing a gaudy stretch pants outfit , starts wearing sexy dresses and getting closer to fernando .
i can think of at least five other ( american ) movies ( including fried green tomatoes and an unmarried woman ) that are more than similar to bread and tulips .
but maglietta and ganz , who act with restraint and care , help bread and tulips from becoming a tired retread .
ganz plays the suicidal waiter role with a solemn , sometimes playful dignity that is a joy to watch , while maglietta never overreacts to her growing comfort with the outside world .
throughout the movie , maglietta has an easygoing , confident demeanor , which makes it very easy to root for her and her growing attraction for ganz's character .
the gorgeous scenery of moonlit town squares and sparkling rivers provides a perfect love story backdrop -- you just might want to ask the attractive stranger in the seat behind you for coffee after the lights come up .
director and co-writer silvio soldini must get credit for sprinkling the movie with effective goofy humor .
the cheap mimmo , desperate to find his wife ( after all , he needs his shirts ironed and his mistress won't do it ) , hires a job applicant ( giuseppe battiston ) at his bathroom supply firm to do the job .
the reason ?
mimmo discovers that the prospective plumber loves detective stories .
the novice detective's various misfortunes , including him saying goodbye to his weepy mother , are very funny .
unfortunately , there are flaws that somewhat spoil bread and tulips' cheery tone .
rosalba is bothered by several surreal dreams during her time in venice , which bring the movie to a halt .
it's like putting a gunfight in a nora ephron movie .
several details in fernando's life also never get proper closure , including his suicidal tendencies .
early in the movie , he nearly hangs himself before rosalba knocks on his apartment door .
after that , fernando's step towards death is never made reference to , probably because soldini wanted to include a lukewarm , underdeveloped subplot about fernando's stormy past .
it seems more like a desperate attempt to pump up the drama in a plot that doesn't need any .
but there aren't a lot of overwhelming negatives in bread and tulips .
the movie is fun and romantic , with beautiful scenery and characters whose lives we'd like to live if we had the nerve . . .
or if our passports weren't missing .
| pos | Positive |
the happy bastard's quick movie review
damn that y2k bug .
it's got a head start in this movie starring jamie lee curtis and another baldwin brother ( william this time ) in a story regarding a crew of a tugboat that comes across a deserted russian tech ship that has a strangeness to it when they kick the power back on .
little do they know the power within . . .
going for the gore and bringing on a few action sequences here and there , virus still feels very empty , like a movie going for all flash and no substance .
we don't know why the crew was really out in the middle of nowhere , we don't know the origin of what took over the ship ( just that a big pink flashy thing hit the mir ) , and , of course , we don't know why donald sutherland is stumbling around drunkenly throughout .
here , it's just " hey , let's chase these people around with some robots " .
the acting is below average , even from the likes of curtis .
you're more likely to get a kick out of her work in halloween h20 .
sutherland is wasted and baldwin , well , he's acting like a baldwin , of course .
the real star here are stan winston's robot design , some schnazzy cgi , and the occasional good gore shot , like picking into someone's brain .
so , if robots and body parts really turn you on , here's your movie .
otherwise , it's pretty much a sunken ship of a movie .
| neg | Positive |
as with any gen-x mtv movie ( like last year's dead man on campus ) , the movie is marketed for a primarily male audience as indicated by its main selling points : sex and football .
those two items , wrapped in a guilty-pleasure package , are sure to snare a sizeable box office chunk initially , but sales will decline for two reasons .
first , the football sequences are nothing new , nor can they be ; the sports genre isn't mainstream and it's been retread to death .
second , the sex is just bad .
despite the appearance of a whipped cream bikini or the all-night strip-club party , there's nothing even remotely tantalizing .
the acting is mostly mediocre , not including the fantastic jon voight .
cultivating his usual sliminess , voight gives an unexpectedly standout performance as west canaan coyotes head coach bud kilmer .
kilmer is the driving force behind the coyotes' twenty-two conference championships and two state titles in thirty years ; this year he plans to make it twenty-three .
unfortunately , when his star quarterback , lance harbor ( paul walker ) , goes down for the count , he's got to rely on the unreliable abilities of backup john moxon ( james van der beek ) .
moxon leads the team through its last four games , and then must cope with his newfound stardom , the effect it has on his relationship with girlfriend julie ( amy smart ) , and other temptations that abound in football-crazy west canaan .
most regions of the country are not nearly as football-crazy as texas , and so the atmosphere is likely to be lost on most .
similarly , the set design is wrong for a high school setting : the teams are decked out with sparkling uniforms , radio headsets ( which never seem to work , however , and instead require coaches to signal plays manually ) , and even a giant bronze statue of coach kilmer .
these elements ( as well as the heavy drinking and carousing ) might be more appropriate on a college campus -- but mtv's core audience is the high school demographic .
this focus is further emphasized by the casting : james van der beek , of tv's " dawson's creek , " is an understandable choice for the reluctant hero , although he never manages to do anything with the role .
other stars are similarly young and unmemorable .
there's not much that goes right about varsity blues , and there's not much to like about it , either .
everything herein has already been done , and if it hasn't , the movie manages to botch it one way or another .
this is certainly missable .
| neg | Negative |
you've got mail is a timely romance for this impersonal , computer-driven decade .
two people who've never met confide in each other via e-mail without revealing their true identities .
nora ephron's contemporary update of the shop around the corner retains the basic plot : two people who despise each other unwittingly become enamored with each other through their anonymous correspondence .
ephron , who co-wrote the film with her sister , delia , as well as directed it , knew what she was doing by reteaming tom hanks and meg ryan as the at-odds couple .
ryan is kathleen kelly , owner of a small children's bookstore , while hanks is joe fox , who heads up a chain of mega bookstores ( think barnes & noble ) .
their charm and chemistry are the glue that binds this film , even through some of the script's rough spots .
for the ephrons invested so much effort in their protagonists that they give short shrift to the talented supporting cast , including parker posey , greg kinnear , jean stapleton and steve zahn .
yet no one is really going to complain because the ephrons know their audience - and what the paying public wants is hanks and ryan .
and the two are kept busy .
one , the other or both are in nearly every scene .
hanks has his decent guy routine down pat , yet each time he does it , it seems effortless , spontaneous and fresh .
ryan smoothly moves between spunky and vulnerable , with a sexy touch of winsomeness added to the brew .
their scenes together sparkle , even though they lack the nostalgic romanticism of sleepless in seattle .
and the shadow of that earlier hit hangs over you've got mail like dried-up mistletoe .
the sparks created by the earlier movie are , by necessity , not evident here .
true , these are two people seeking true love , but you've got mail is more comic and less poignant than its predecessor .
the ephrons' script is witty and sharp .
however , as a director nora ephron is a bit uneven .
some scenes drag , while others , especially when hanks and ryan are revealing their souls via e-mail , are crisp and tidy .
also , the script gets sloppy toward the end with characters merely disappearing from the story .
a nice , romantic soundtrack adds to this date-night special .
overall , you've got mail is a lush and cute outing , taking advantage of the star appeal of its two leads .
it's a nice holiday movie , one for holding hands and snuggling .
committed to lifelong learning through effective communication
| pos | Positive |
gere , willis , poitier chase each other around the world
the jackal a film review by michael redman copyright 1997 by michael redman
when the soviet union imploded , the western countries lost their shadow .
with the united states friendly with the russians , we no longer had an entity to blame for the world's problems .
this showed up in hollywood films as the communist government was no longer the easy bad guy .
it's time to rejoice because we've found our new villain .
now it's no longer the russian government who sends killers out into foreign lands , it's the russian _mafia_ .
a perfect solution , it combines the dread of organized crime and the still-present uneasiness with the former eastern block countries .
best of all , the villains are still foreigners : fear of the other always plays best .
so it is a crime lord in moscow that sends legendary hitman the jackal ( bruce willis ) to assassinate a highly placed us government figure in retaliation for the death of his brother during a nightclub raid .
the fbi is at a loss as to how to protect the target from someone they're not sure even exists .
coming to their rescue is former ira operative declan mulqueen ( richard gere ) who is temporarily released from prison to assist fbi agent carter preston ( sidney poitier ) and russian major valentina koslova ( diane venora ) .
mulqueen's ex-girlfriend basque terrorist isabella ( mathilda may ) is the only person who has seen the elusive jackal .
( presumably there is an exclusive international terrorist club somewhere where the three met . )
the film follows two parallel tracks as the jackal prepares for his $70 million hit and mulqueen attempts to locate him while preston makes sure that the irishman doesn't slip away .
crossing numerous borders and donning various disguises for both himself and his mini-van , the killer is always one step ahead of his pursuers .
being very loosely based on the same book the 1973 thriller " the day of the jackal " , comparison between the two films is inevitable .
there is no doubt that the original is the better movie , playing the story for suspense rather than the current action/adventure .
as a mystery , " the jackal " has enough holes in it to ruin the tale , but if you can accept it for what it is , there's entertainment to be had .
holes ? let's see ? a pivotal clue for mulqueen is so obscure that he must possess psychic powers to pick it up .
for a 20-year veteran that can command the big bucks , the jackal is an incredibly poor shot .
the final scene between gere and willis occurs in a location that should be mobbed with police , but it's just the two of them .
willis' disguises usually look like bruce willis and are just as interesting as val kilmer's in " the saint " .
( and lest you misunderstand , that's not a compliment . )
but the three stars are fun to watch .
it's good to see gere in something other than a business suit .
willis has a mixed history in picking projects , but his characters are always watchable .
poitier is by far the superior actor , but has limited screen time .
the problems in logic are flaws , but don't ruin the experience .
occasionally there are movies that transcend their blemishes .
this is one of them .
[the appeared in the 11/20/97 " bloomington voice " , bloomington , indiana]
| pos | Positive |
guilt . guilt is something i felt while watching basic instinct for the ninth time ; the penultimate t & a thriller , basic instinct made my last few teenage years worth living .
but i know so well that it's a terrible film , made by a terrible director incapable of feeling guilt .
verhoeven went on to make the even more offensive showgirls and , on november seventh , 1997 , unleashed starship troopers to innocent moviegoers like me , who cannot control the urge to see giant bug movies .
the pic begins with the most unintentional laugh of the year .
a simple , white on black title card reads " starship troopers " -my friends and i speculated that the night before the prints were shipped , verhoeven realized he forgot the credits .
is this how a hundred million dollar movie should open ?
were the rest of the film that subdued . . .
starship troopers is about a group of white , blond-haired himbos and bimbos who all have spanish last names .
they graduate high school , join the military , and then , rather curiously , decide to travel to an alien planet and destroy all lifeforms on that planet .
the story is so incomprehensible , and told so bombastically , it's akin to 129 minutes of someone screaming punishments at you in a foreign tongue .
( aside , club lovers will be happy to know that dance music hasn't changed in the future . )
one plus : starship troopers contains some very funny sequences , specifically the newsreels of the future .
hysterically funny , actually .
but the cynicism of these reports left me curious as to whether verhoeven felt pessimistic about the story in between .
the storytelling lacks focus , to say the least .
the politics of the film are scary .
the actions of the major female characters are dictated by their out-of-control libidos .
there's even a creepy sex scene : the lovely dina meyer makes out , nude , with the sickening van dien while half her face is covered by her opaque sweater , just the way he seems to like it .
i use the term sickening because van dien is the least appealing actor i've encountered in a big budget picture ; all chiseled features and machismo , he even barks a eulogy at a funeral like military orders .
of course , verhoeven's probably the one to blame , and perhaps i'm jealous because i'm so disgusting .
at any rate , a movie called starship troopers shouldn't be about sex .
exactly ten years ago , verhoeven made robocop , which was about nothing but skillfully made and oddly moving .
and r-rated , despite its goofy premise .
maybe it's asking too much for verhoeven to make a pg-movie , then-he's a master of insipid violence .
however , ten year old boys would adore starship troopers if they could see it .
| neg | Negative |
men in black is an explosive mix of science fiction , action , and comedy that hits the target in every possible way .
although another alien movie , men in black succeeds in every way that independence day didn't , and towers above many other movies of its type .
the brilliant acting , especially by tommy lee jones as agent kay , is also as good as it gets .
director barry sonnenfeld , who was behind the camera for the addams family movies and get shorty , has crafted a masterpiece .
the story behind men in black is just as interesting as you would want it to be .
the men in black , or mib , are a top-secret governmental agency that is not known to exist .
the mib are responsible for " saving the world from the scum of the universe " .
a though job , indeed .
the film opens with a truckload of illegal aliens ( the human kind ) being transported across the mexico border and into the united states .
presumably , these " aliens " are all migrant workers .
that is , until the mib show up and begin interrogating them .
agent kay selects a particular suspicious worker and takes him away from the other local authorities to discover that he is not an illegal human alien , but a real extra-terrestrial alien .
when the alien makes a run for it , agent kay is forced to eliminate the alien with one of the mib's very unique weapons , and after one of the local law enforcement officers witnesses this bizarre occurrence , agent kay is forced to use another very unique device on them .
the device , described as " out of state " , eliminates the memory of anyone it is used on .
>from here , we are introduced to james edwards , played very well by will smith .
edwards , a police officer , is chasing a fleeing criminal .
the criminal gives a very good chase , and at one point when edwards confronts him , the criminal pulls out a very different looking weapon that disintegrated when it hit the ground .
edwards continues to chase the very athletic criminal to the top of a building , where the criminal informs edwards that he must let him go , because someone is after him .
edwards doesn't take this seriously , but when the criminal shows very non-human characteristics and leaps off the building , he begins to wonder .
back at the police station , agent kay shows up to ask edwards a few questions .
he informs edwards that is was , in fact , a non-human that he was chasing , and that the gun he pulled out was definitely not man-made .
he has edwards identify the gun , and asks edwards to come to the mib headquarters the following day .
edwards arrives and finds that he is involved in a recruiting process , along with various other men who seem a bit more qualified than he .
after goofing up for half of the time , edwards puts on a show at the firing range , and agent kay notes the reason why he feels edwards should be the man to join the mib : he chased down the " criminal " on foot , which is something that no one is supposed to be able to do .
in the meantime , an upstate new york farm has a very close encounter .
edgar ( vincent d'onofrio ) , owner of the farm , investigates a strange crash landing and is attacked by the inhabitant of the flying object , which presumes to jump inside edgar and use his body as a human transport .
the " bug " , as he is called , is an intergalactic terrorist who has come to earth to attempt to kill two ambassadors .
and it up to the mib , with newly recruited agent jay ( formerly james edwards ) to exterminate the bug and save the planet from intergalactic war .
men in black delightfully combines fast-paced action with often hilarious comedy , which is usually from will smith , although tommy lee jones opens up his comedic personality in this film .
the special effects are also very well done and are not the entire source of the plot , as in another big alien film from the past summer .
screenwriter ed solomon , writer of super mario bros .
and the upcoming x-men film , has surely struck gold with this story .
all ages will enjoy men in black .
it is an extremely fun film that you will want to see again .
although it runs a very quick and speedy 96 minutes , the entire film from beginning to end is a non-stop adventure .
the ending of the film , which ties up a few loose ends for one of the main characters , is also very well done .
a sequel is already being planned , so there is more to look forward to !
| pos | Positive |
kids today , they don't just want to see heartthrob and master thespian freddie prinze jr . loving on the ladies .
no , they want to see him doing something that takes a little more in the acting department : namely , playing baseball .
through a series of drippy voiceovers , we are informed that there's no better proving ground for major league baseball than the cape cod summer baseball leagues , where college also-rans and hopeful dropouts go to play in the hopes of attracting big league attention .
our man freddie has landed a spot as a pitcher on the prestigious chatham a's , where he is hoping for his big break .
it's only after he is given ample time to show off his abs and scamper about in a woman's thong ( don't ask ) that we learn what the real story of summer catch will be : that prinze is a poor townie named ryan dunne , struggling to make a name for himself ; that neither his father ( fred ward ) nor brother ( jason gedrick ) pulled themselves out of their blue collar jobs and resent anyone who tries ; and that the local beauty tenley -- tenley !
( jessica biel ) -- is so far out of his league that he probably shouldn't even bother . . .
but of course he makes a play for her .
summer catch also makes an abortive stab at another half a dozen subplots -- the jealousy of fellow townie and brazen slut dee dee ( brittany murphy ) , the alienation felt by ryan's non-baseball playing best friend ( gabriel mann ) , or the fat chick fetish of fellow player miles ( marc blucas ) .
worst of these is a ludicrous bit involving that '70s show's wilmer valderrama and beverly d'angelo , both of whom appear in the film simply to provide a nutty mrs . robinson-like substory and to remind you of how much better done that was in bull durham .
in fact , virtually all of summer catch feels like it's been done better somewhere else .
for starters , the film has a major question of identity .
it's definitely not a sports movie , and it fails pretty miserably at being a romance .
the worst part is the amateurish script ( co-written by an arli$$ writing alumnus and a guy that starred in leprechaun 3 ) , chock-full of phony emotion .
by the end , it all becomes a platform for each character to deliver a soliloquy to ryan that he must take to heart .
dad is on hand to give fatherly yet drunken advice .
coach ( brian dennehy , just loving the fact that he's got some work on the big screen ) is on hand to give the curmudgeonly counterpoint .
ryan's catcher ( matthew lillard , playing himself again ) is on hand to tell ryan to " play catch " with him and make fun of the fat fetish guy .
ryan's stoner best friend is on hand to give the go-get-'em-tiger-we're-behind-you talk .
and the girlfriend is on hand to give heartwarming-nuzzly-follow-your-dreams counsel .
before long , you start to wonder : is freddy prinze jr . is capable of having a thought of his own ?
don't answer that .
the only real joy in the film is found in biel's character , and not just because of the skimpy outfits , which are also usually wet .
she's the only one in the movie that is able to do much with her role , taking the rebelling-against-daddy character to at least a passing grade .
when she's on screen , the time flies by .
when she's not , you realize that for some ungodly reason this movie is almost two hours long .
for a pg-13 teen romance ( despite near-constant sexual innuendo ) , one has to ask warner brothers : what were you thinking ? ? ?
for her part , biel has fallen so far from her 7th heaven roots that she has almost become denise richards .
hollywood is either about to eat her alive . . .
or vice versa .
either way , good luck , jessica .
as for freddie , if he keeps pumping teen romances out at the rate of two a year , prinze's next " summer catch " is liable to be a venereal disease .
| neg | Negative |
warren beatty's " bulworth " is a caustic political comedy that doesn't attack any particular political group , but rather the ingrained insincerity that has infected the american political system .
some might think this film is vulgar , and in many ways it is .
however , as loud and raucous as it is , " bulworth " speaks the truth , which is almost always ugly to hear .
beatty , who directed the film and co-wrote the script with jeremy pikser ( " the lemon sisters " ) , stars as incumbent u . s . senator jay billington bulworth , who has one of the best politician names in cinema history .
bulworth is a democrat , and in beatty's view , he is symbolic of everything that has gone wrong with the current democratic party .
once an ideological liberal ( like beatty still is ) , bulworth has long since succumbed to the materialistic pressures of washington .
instead of waging the battles for the impoverished and the downtrodden , which was once the calling card of democrats , bulworth has become another sell-out money hound - if he's not accepting illegal bribes from the insurance lobby or taking campaign contributions from the chinese , he's making wind-bag speeches that start with the amusingly clintonesqe statement , " america is standing on the doorstep of a new millennium . . . .
blah , blah , blah . "
when the film opens , it is a few days before the 1996 primary elections , and bulworth is sitting at his desk weeping because he realizes how corrupt he has become .
in a fit of desperation , he takes out a $10 million life insurance policy from a dirty insurance rep played by paul sorvino ( part of a shady lobby deal to kill a threatening bill in committee ) , and then hires a hit man to kill him , although he doesn't know who the assassin will be , or when the hit will take place .
knowing that he will soon be dead , bulworth unleashes his own brand of political rhetoric on the world , which is made up of politically incorrect truths about the state of american politics and the society in general .
at a compton church , he tells the group of african-americans that they will have no power in the u . s . unless they " put down that malt liquor and chicken wings , and get behind somebody other than a running back who stabs his wife . "
later , in a particularly hilarious sequence , bulworth mixes with the hollywood elite , then insults the quality of their movies and informs them that the only reason he's there is because " my guys always put the big jews on my schedule . "
all throughout this physically and politically suicidal escapade , bulworth's chief of staff , dennis murphy ( oliver platt ) , follows behind in a state of constant shock and bewilderment .
platt has some of the movie's funniest scenes , as he makes murphy into a politically savvy but nonetheless clueless assistant who is forced to watch his own career teeter at the brink of being flushed down the toilet .
his constant half-truth-telling and spin-doctoring to cover bulworth's stampede is equaled in its perversion only by a self-righteous reporter ( nora dunn ) who acts like murphy's refusal to explain bulworth's actions ( something he really cannot do ) is somehow an act of treason .
when bulworth decides he wants to live after all , and therefore must constantly evade a grim-looking assassin to be who's trailing him at every turn , he hides out in the ghetto , complete with a stereotypical gangsta wardrobe which he wears to one of his television interviews .
at this point , beatty abandons much of the political aspect and dives into a cartoonish exploration of the black inner-city experience .
bulworth becomes friendly with a young black woman named nina ( halle berry ) , who he meets at the harlem church rally .
she has a tough-talking brother who is deep in debt to a local gangster named l . d .
( don cheadle of " boogie nights " ) , who also becomes involved in bulworth's campaign .
some of the scenes in the ghetto ring true , but much of it feels like a lighter version of scenes depicted in more intense inner-city films like " boyz'n'hood " ( 1991 ) and " menace ii society " ( 1993 ) .
" bulworth's " chief liability is beatty's insistence on having his character adopt a clumsy style of rap as his new communication device .
instead of speaking at political rallies , he breaks into a kind of rhythmless rap style that is a reminder of why almost all hip-hop stars are black .
it's hard to tell whether beatty is being humorous by being so bad , or whether he's actually that incompetent .
at any rate , the rap sounds more run d . m . c .
than snoop doggy dogg , which makes the film seem dated instead of contemporary .
beatty would have been better off simply adopting some of the inner-city lingo and working that into his speeches , instead of trying to sound like l . l . cool j .
other than that , " bulworth " hits all its targets with wry , hilarious accuracy .
the film is like a letter bomb to the democratic party , and even if you don't agree with beatty's liberal message about the unrequited duties of the federal government , it is hard to deny the impact the film has in exploring the monetary and moral debauchery that infests modern politics .
unlike " primary colors " which opened earlier this year , " bulworth " doesn't try to tip-toe around the truly painful issues that hit close to home - instead , it takes them dead-on .
| pos | Negative |
the plot of big momma's house is martin lawrence in a fat suit and a dress .
that's not just the high-concept premise ; it's the fully-realized , all-encompassing plot .
such an emphasis is not unheard-of in the world of hollywood summer entertainment .
one need merely look back to last summer , when the plot of big daddy was adam sandler being an incompetent surrogate parent .
the trap inherent in such an approach is that the high-concept plot idea better be pretty well-realized , or rest on the shoulders of an extremely talented performer , because you can bet there will be nothing else worth a second of your time -- not a developed character , not a provocative theme , not a witty twist .
you will get 90-plus minutes of martin lawrence in a fat suit and a dress -- nothing more , nothing less .
those who find martin lawrence more than an occasionally amusing screen presence may have a shot at enjoying the one-note dud that is big momma's house .
others will simply stare , mouth agape , at its sheer unapologetic laziness .
lawrence plays fbi agent malcolm turner , an undercover expert on a stakeout assignment with his partner john ( paul giamatti ) .
dangerous convicted bank robber and murderer lester vesco ( terrence howard ) has escaped from prison , and the feds think he's headed for his former girlfriend and presumed-but-never-proved accomplice sherry ( nia long ) .
sherry , however , has fled with her son trent ( jascha washington ) , possibly to visit her grandmother hattie mae ( ella mitchell ) , better known as big momma .
indeed , sherry appears to be on her way , but big momma is headed out of town without knowing sherry is coming .
that leaves master of disguise malcolm to go under very heavy cover as big momma and find out what sherry knows .
big momma's house's bloodlines are certainly traceable to mrs .
doubtfire -- director raja gosnell edited that film , and the makeup effects were similarly created by greg cannom -- but there's just as strong a whiff of tootsie in the main character's attempt to use his alternate identity to get closer to a woman .
unfortunately , big momma's house makes a ridiculous decision neither of those other films made : instead of having the protagonist pose as a completely manufactured character unfamiliar to anyone elses , it places malcolm in the position of playing a friend and family member to several other characters .
suspension of disbelief in big momma's house requires you to believe every other person in the film is blind and/or stupid , since no one notices that one big momma looks or sounds absolutely nothing like the other .
of course , laughs trumps logic every time , and big momma's house probably still would have worked in spite of its utter disdain for common sense if it had just managed to be funny .
and it misses its best possible opportunity for some great farce by ignoring the simple fact that the real big momma is set up as a foul-tempered beast , while malcolm has to be nurturing in order to get the information he wants out of sherry .
unfortunately , no one involved appears to have the faintest idea how to deal with the comic gold mine involved in one real person pretending to be another , very different real person , so they fall back on an endless parade of sight gags : malcolm reacting violently to big momma's explosive diarrhea attack ; malcolm-as-momma schooling a pair of cocky teens in basketball ; malcolm trying to avoid detection as various prostheses give way at inopportune moments ; malcolm delivering a baby because big momma is the town midwife ( one of the few sequences that works ) .
martin lawrence can be likeable enough at times , but there's no reason to care a whit about his budding romance with sherry because malcolm is never an independently significant character .
he's just big momma without the makeup on .
i won't waste time commenting on how ineptly the set-up of the escaped convict is employed , since it was clearly a waste of time to the film-makers .
there are a few token scenes of lester looming as a threatening figure , but he's ultimately a distraction in a film that's really about its central visual incongruity ( and the accompanying lascivious glances at nia long's posterior ) .
i'm never prepared to underestimate how appealing that idea may be to other people -- several million of them apparently found adam sandler as an incompetent surrogate parent appealing -- but i know that when a film-maker tries to throw a concept at me and pretend that it's an entire film , i duck out of the way .
the gross implausibility of big momma's house might have been tolerable if it was seasoned with more big , cleverly-constructed laughs .
its lack of big laughs might have been tolerable if its characters were at all relevant .
big momma's house is ridiculous _and_ not funny .
it's just a sad exercise in the jaded presumption that any scene should be considered wacky and hilarious if it involves martin lawrence in a fat suit and a dress .
| neg | Negative |
plot : lara croft is british , rich and kicks a lot of ass .
she also likes to raid tombs but when the illuminata discover that all nine planets are about to stand in alignment for the first time in 5000 years , and that lara holds the key to time , well , needless to say , they want to nab it from her .
oh yeah , lara also likes to sport a lot of tight shirts . . . hummana-hummana-hummana . . .
critique : angelina jolie was great in this movie .
there were also about three " action scenes " that were pretty cool to look at in this film .
uhhhhhm , unfortunately the rest of the movie sucked !
bad dialogue , generic sidekicks and bad guys , a lame mystery , yoda-esque moments with mumbo-jumbo being sprouted about and even some crappy cgi near the end .
all in all , this movie wasn't the horror show that some of the early reviews had warned us about , especially since every other scene does feature jolie's torpedoes begging to burst out of her lucky shirts , but it was quite the letdown nonetheless , especially when you consider the major opportunity that the filmmakers had here to create a cool , hip woman hero , based on a popular video game .
i don't know , i guess you have to put most of the blame on director simon west , who didn't really tie the whole movie together all that well .
the film lacked energy , a consistent pace and well . . . a
fun time !
i felt kinda depressed while watching this movie .
all that " father " crap was horrible and the dialogue given to poor john voight to recite was just plain embarrassing ( and i'm not even gonna mention his moustache . . . hehehe ) .
why have this shite in the movie at all ? ! ?
i especially hated the scenes in which some ghost-like figure , friend or child would ramble on about lara croft's father while all the time , i'm not giving one ounce of crap as to what they're talking about .
i guess that's called lack of " character development " , right ?
that's when a movie builds enough background into the characters on the screen , so that we could actually " get into " it and care about them .
i didn't care about anyone in this movie , and was bored during most of its " let's explain why we're doing all this gobbledygook " moments .
and even though i thought that jolie kicked some mighty ass ( damn , did she look sexy blasting those guns or what ? ! ? ) , everybody else around her was so goddamn boring !
her butler was a throwaway with no personality , her side-kick was supposed to be funny but just annoyed me every time he said the word " bugger " ( and he says it a lot , trust me ! ) and all of the so-called bad guys just spewed one-dimension !
they had no spark , no energy amongst them , and even though a few of the action scenes in the movie were cool ( see the trailer and you'll know which ones i'm talking about ) , the overall picture was lame and the dialogue and mystical bull-crap just buried it even further .
also , for a movie that's supposed to be about all of these exotic locations , i wasn't necessarily impressed by any of its exterior shots , and even less so with its interiors , which all looked like they were shot in the same room .
mind you , i won't go as far as to say that it's the " worst movie of the year " ( remember that i actually have to go see freddie prinze jr . movies also ! ) , but it's definitely the worst film that i've seen during this summer movie season ( of course , it's still early and i'm sure there are a few more garbage heaps coming down the pike ) .
skip this one altogether and rent any of the indiana jones movies instead . . . trust
me , you'll miss the boobs but end your night with some rock-solid porn and it's all good !
where's joblo coming from ?
raiders of the lost ark ( 10/10 ) - the mummy ( 8/10 ) - lost in space ( 7/10 ) - the mummy returns ( 6/10 ) - the general's daughter ( 3/10 ) - romancing the stone ( 7/10 ) - wild wild west ( 3/10 ) - mission impossible 2 ( 7/10 )
| neg | Positive |
warning : anyone offended by blatant , leering machismo had better avoid this film .
or lots of blood & guts , men against men and mano-et-mano stuff .
in other words , it's a walter hill film !
with a john milius script !
i always picture these guys getting together and producing a movie between arm-wrestling matches .
these films always contain male characters i have a very hard time identifying with , probably due to the likelihood that any meeting between them and me would result in my arm being ripped off and then my subsequent death by beating with said limb .
and we got tough guys galore , here ; drug-running banditos by the dozens , all dirty and sweaty and pretty ill-tempered , overall ; a secret task force of army commandos who are in the area to cover-up ( supposedly ) any connection between the government and the drug runners ; and lots of shit-kicking texas dirt farmers who'd as soon shoot you between the eyes as look at you .
in particular , we got nick nolte as one hard-ass texas ranger , powers boothe as the drug kingpin , michael ironsides as the leader of the secret army , and rip torn as the local sheriff .
torn is the sympathetic figure of the group ; he smiles before shooting anyone .
as to women . . .
well , i've never seen jane fonda or meryl streep in a walter hill film , and at this rate , i doubt i ever will .
women exist here to look good , comfort the man , and get argued over .
gosh !
just like the old days . . .
frankly , this is a pretty good movie , if you can accept the premise and can take the macho stuff .
the cinematography is excellent , the cast of characters is broad and has texture , the script is quite good , and the film lets you keep up with what's happening yourself , without spelling it out to you .
i appreciate a film that makes me have to think to keep up .
finally , there's lots of sam peckinpah slow-motion shoot-ups .
| pos | Positive |
susan granger's review of " two can play that game " ( screen gems )
since the success of " waiting to exhale , " there have been several romantic comedies about african-american professionals .
this female revenge fantasy , vivica a . fox plays shante smith , a stunning ad exec who seems to have reached the pinnacle of success : a mansion , a sporty car and an idyllic relationship with a hunky , hot-shot lawyer , morris chestnut .
she's at a point in her life when she dispenses advice to her grateful girl-friends ( mo'nique , wendy racquel robinson , tamala jones ) .
" when your man messes up , no matter how small it is , " she smugly decrees , " yuh gots to punish him . "
so when she catches her hot man dancing at a bar with a smart and sexy rival , gabrielle union , she devises her own version of " the rules , " a 10-day " tough love " emotionally punishing plan to get him back .
unfortunately , writer/director mark brown ( " how to be a player " ) breaks the cardinal rule of romantic comedy : you have to like the protagonist - and shrill , self-congratulatory shante smith is a smirking , superficial , spiteful shrew who doesn't realize that rational rules cannot always be applied to love .
having her talk directly into the camera gets stale very quickly and the " day one , " " day two " title-card device underscores the tedium .
comic anthony anderson scores as chestnut's boisterous best-friend , and singer bobby brown does a cameo as a scuzzy mechanic who's given a smooth makeover by ms . robinson .
but the out-takes over the closing credits contain more humor than the film itself .
on the granger movie gauge of 1 to 10 , " two can play that game " is smarmy if slick 4 , filled with misogynistic attitude and blatant product placements ( coca-cola , miller genuine draft ) but little else .
in this r-rated ( for explicit sexual language ) , pseudo-hip battle of the sexes , the audience loses .
| neg | Negative |
joe versus the volcano is really one of the worse movies made in very recent memory .
the strangest thing is that you would think nothing would go wrong with it .
it has a solid cast with tom hanks & meg ryan as the lead roles .
but you can never judge a movie by its cast . . .
if there is one good thing about joe vs the volcano , it is that the plot is original .
unfortunately , it is also incredibly stupid .
the movie begins with joe ( tom hanks ) going to work .
this opening sequence is very boring and slow .
it shows joe walking to his office .
but on the way , he has to wait in a long line passing by strange and slightly depressing scenery with obnoxious lighting .
a sequence like this should take 2 minutes .
here , it takes over 5 . . .
it is obvious that joe hates his job .
at his office , one of his co-workers is meg ryan .
oddly enough , she plays 3 different roles in this movie ! !
joe leaves to go to a doctor's appointment .
his doctor informs him that he has a " brain cloud . "
this means that in a few months , he will die .
so what does joe do ?
quit his job , of course ! !
when he arrives home , joe meets an old man named graynamore ( lloyd bridges ) .
graynamore tells joe that in order to get some important mineral for his company from an island , the natives need someone to sacrifice to their volcano to please their fire god .
by a startling coincidence , the boat trip to the island takes a few months .
by the time he reaches the island , he will almost be dead from the " brain cloud " anyway , so joe agrees .
graynamore gives joe a credit card to buy everything he needs to go on this " great adventure " .
joe goes on a date with meg ryan , his co-worker .
the day before the boat trip , joe meets one of graynamore's daughters .
she is also , surprise , meg ryan .
except she looks more hippyish .
they both have dinner and the next day , joe gets driven over to his boat .
the lady that sails the boat is another one of graynamore's daughters .
and , wonder of wonders , she is also played by meg ryan .
as they sail to the island , meg ryan tells joe that the natives of the island have a craving for orange soda .
after some stupid talking scenes , they also deduce that graynamore had his doctor be the one that joe went to .
and that the " brain cloud " thing was made up ! !
they do plently of cheap special effects on the boat voyage .
joe goes fishing and catches a hammerhead shark .
this is a cheap gag that has been pulled off many times .
but , to top it off , the shark is obviously rubber and fake ! !
one night there is a storm .
a cheap-looking lightning bolt strikes the boat and everything is cast overboard .
fortunately , joe and meg ryan manage to find some of the luggage that joe brought to sail .
by pure luck , they get to the island .
since the natives like orange soda , they wear soda cans as attire ! !
stupid or what ?
; ) before joe leaps in the volcano , he gets fed .
right before he jumps , meg ryan pleads him not to .
when joe decides to , she goes in with him because " she loves him " .
now this is where the movie should end .
but , unfortunately , the " cheesy ending " bug comes in .
the volcano blows the couple out and into the ocean where they land on joe's luggage .
they float to another part of the island as they watch lava pouring out of the volcano towards the villagers .
i give this movie a .
see it only if you're a film buff that enjoys a bad movie every now and then or if you really like tom hanks or meg ryan . . .
| neg | Negative |
saw an advanced screening of the movie sniper last night , and i have to say i wasn't too impressed .
this film is about an expert marine sniper , played by tom berenger , who is teamed with a hot-shot-young-no-experience-never-killed-a-man new partner to take out some drug-kingpins and military strong men in panama .
sound cliche ?
that's only the beginning .
billy zane ( memphis belle ) played the rookie , and never seemed to get a handle on his character .
he was so contrary and pig-headed in the beginning , you just wanted to smack him .
then he goes " crazy " from the pressure , but seems to immediately snap out of it .
i'm not sure if the blame should lie with the directing , editing , scriptwriting , or acting . . .
but it didn't all come together .
i think berenger is a pretty good actor , and he looked great in the part , covered in camo , face painted , stalking through the jungle with his high-power rifle . . .
but once again , his character was given some pretty bad dialogue , and didn't react too logically to many of the situations .
there was very little logical development in these characters .
my biggest problem with this film was it's tendency to put these two snipers in as * many * inches-from-death situations as possible .
they began to resemble g . i . joes , the greatest american hero .
and of course their almost supernatural accuracy with their guns was called upon to get them out of far too many close calls .
now a lot of movies are stamped out of this mold , in fact that's what made die hard so much fun : the super-hero avenger type .
so some will enjoy the action hero heroics , but i didn't think it fit with the nice tension that was built up in the earlier scenes , and the " real life " feel of covert operations in panama .
a word must be said on the camera work , much of it was very nice .
the jungles of panama ( or their stand-ins in this case ) formed a very picturesque background . . .
and the drama of speeding bullets was captured using some nice trick photography .
many have seen the slowed down " bullet-cam " following the projectile to its target .
this was used well in the beginning to show the feverish nightmares berenger gets when remembering the moment of the kill .
it was dramatic when used in flashback . . . but
it seems the director liked the technique so much he started inserting these shots ( pardon the pun ) into the real time action . . . then
it just seemed silly .
all in all , not a real dog : there is some nice action , good atmosphere , and pretty photography .
but the plot is pretty lame , the acting didn't form a cohesive whole , and far too much thisclosefromdeath heroics .
| neg | Negative |
so what do you get when you mix together plot elements from various successful sci-fi films such as close encounters of the third kind , 2001 : a space odyssey , apollo 13 and contact ?
well , whatever it is , you'd sure as hell hope that it would be a thousand times better than this shoddy attempt at such a melange , considering the disastrous results we're left with here .
this is a film that takes a little bit of everything , but ultimately adds up to a lot of nothing !
it's like i said . . . this
movie sucks .
plot : a rescue crew of astronauts is sent down to mars in the year 2020 , after an unknown energy force leads to a loss of contact with the previous gang of space aviators to visit the red planet .
critique : extremely underwhelming is the best way to describe this movie .
uneven , would be another .
the trailer for this movie actually showed some promise , the buzz around it had been so-so , and even the film itself starts off with a decent first twenty minutes , all leading you to believe that it's actually going to go " somewhere " .
but it isn't long before the entire movie downshifts into neutral , features more space walks than anything interesting on the cherry-colored planet , tries too hard to get us into the " pain " of some its characters and unsuccessfully tosses some romance into the mix .
in a sci-fi movie ?
well , i don't know , much of it just seemed like a bunch of nerdies talking techie jargon for about an hour and a half , only to figure out some big secret in the end , a secret which practically had me yawning with excitement .
ultimately , this is a movie that starts off with a decent premise , joins the crew in their " misadventures in space " for the main crux of its journey , and eventually settles down for one of the most anti-climactic endings this side of contact .
mind you , if you enjoyed that film's shrug-of-the-shoulders ending , you might just enjoy this frivolous ditty as well .
of course , i don't remember contact having such obvious and painfully distracting computer generated effects at its end of story .
ugh .
what a friggin' mess .
films like this generally get me wondering about the brass in hollywood again .
didn't anybody recognize the crappiness in this script ?
didn't they read the bad dialogue , the cheezy lines , the obvious derivative nature of the work ( mind you , with a director like depalma at the helm , that ain't saying much ! ) .
of course , you can't really blame the brass for the inclusion of jerry o'connell in this fine crew of thespians .
'nuff said .
neither can you blame them for depalma cranking up the juice on the film's musical score during the last fifteen minutes , presumably in order to wake the audience up ( okay , we get it brian , this scene is supposed to be powerful . . . wow . . . yawn . . . my
ears hurt ! ) .
so is anything salvageable in this movie ?
sure .
gary sinise does another great job , as does cheadle , the film doesn't completely bore you as much as it just moves along slowly without anything really interesting happening , and yes , the " sand-twister " effect that you see in the commercial is well done .
other than that ?
i guess i could say that i admire how filmmakers have become so much more devious in their product placement strategies . . . oops ,
did i say " admire " , i meant " am disgusted " !
all in all , this movie delivers very little in actual substance , offers two-bit dialogue masked in a lot of sci-fi mumbo-jumbo , pretends to be deep when really it's just sappy , and eventually just settles into an ending which , other than presenting us with a pathetic computer graphic as a part of the story , gives us little more to think about than how we might be able to get our money back for sitting through this rehashed dreck .
go see the ninth gate . . . now
there's a great movie !
and on a personal note , i think it's time for depalma to stop worrying so much about his proverbial 12-minute uninterrupted film sequences , and start worrying more about how crappy his movies are getting .
| neg | Negative |
i know what i would do with $4 . 4 million if i found it in a previously undiscovered airplane crash site , especially if i were with jacob and lou .
( huh ? )
well , in any event , that is the situation hank ( paxton ) finds himself in .
he and his dim-witted brother jacob ( thorton ) and tubby friend lou ( brent briscoe ) come upon a large bag of cash inside a plane wreck .
against his better judgement , hank decides to go along with the idea of keeping it rather than going to the authorities .
the rest of the film is a question of who is going to die to keep this a secret , and is it worth it ?
a simple wish lies along the lines of very bad things , clay pigeons and even fargo , and is kind of wrapped all into one little dark bundle .
oh , and its much better than any of those .
sam raimi took a departure from his normal freak-show horror-monkey films and made this stylish and intriguing picture .
he really lets the audience sit back and watch the events unfold rather than force them down our throats as many directors prefer to do .
i think raimi knew he had a winner on his hands and decided to direct the picture on a natural flowing course .
one of the film's components can be linked to a recurring theme in terrence malick's the thin red line .
in malick's three hour bore-a-thon , he makes an interesting attempt to link mother earth to his war story .
it seemed nothing more than an occasional pretty cut to a field of flowing grass , a small bird , or a flowing body of water .
sure , there were obvious metaphorical connections , but there was no subtlty to his efforts .
raimi does a fine job of tying in a fox in a chicken coop and birds of prey to signify the future of the characters .
i think most viewers may miss the comparison , but it is a very intriguing ingredient in the film .
and then there's billy bob thorton , who is proof that the independent film industry is vital to the life blood of hollywood .
if it can continute to produce people like thorton , hollywood will be ok .
he gives a fantastic and devastatingly deep performance here .
it is not as engrossing as his carl childers character in slingblade , but is is just as complex , if not more so .
jacob is slow and simple , and yet we so often see him deep in thought .
i wondered if he was thinking about things that he would never say ( or didn't know how to say ) or if he was just taking a long time to think about the thing he just said .
here he really proves his worth as one of the best character actors in the industry .
though the plot is somewhat unoriginal , it has a very appealing new twist in its characters .
paxton gives one of the better performances of his career as the straight and serious leader of the group ( a far cry from chet in wierd science ) .
perhaps bridget fonda is miscast as his advice-giving wife , but she certainly doesn't do anything ruin the picture .
a simple plan can be included in the group of recent small hollywood films that is just dark and pretty un-redeeming .
but at least this one has an important message , unlike so many of its counterparts .
| pos | Negative |
about an hour or so into " the jackal , " a character wandered around as people were being shot at in a big suspense sequence , and one of the audience members in the theatre i saw it in shouted out " i hope she gets killed now ! "
at that point it hit me : i didn't care for any of the characters being played by actors i didn't really like .
when the sole reason you care about a character being played by sidney poitier in a suspense film is because he's being played by sidney poitier , you know something's rotten in the state of denmark .
every year , a couple films like this are released .
you know : the cheap , action packed international espionnage film , featuring a semi-promising premise , some big-name actors ( usually bruce willis ) , and the hopes that some audience members will forget the cold war ended several years ago .
this was the third one of '97 , following the very lackluster " the saint , " which featured an amoral costume changing bond wannabe ; and the surprisingly fun " the peacemaker , " featuring clooney and kidman trying to stop an almost untraceable villain .
" the jackal " tries to mix both elements .
and you thought " the saint " was bad .
" the jackal " is loosely ( very loosely , i hope ) based on the 1973 fred zimmerman classic that i've yet to see , " the day of the jackal , " which featured ( apparently ) a suave hitman called the jackal , played by edward fox , trying to assasinate charles degaule .
well , welcome to the 90s , where a sorta suave hitman , also called the jackal ( bruce willis ) , trying to kill the head of the fbi . . . or
is he ?
after being hired by a russian mob lord as a bit of vengeance for the murder of his brother ( killed in the opening scenes ) , the jackal romps all over the northen hemisphere , from helsinki to virginia , setting up an elaborate scheme wherein he'll be able to assasinate this person and still get away to live in seclusion .
and like the saint , the jackal changes his look over and over and over again to elude people .
the agent working on the case , cater preston ( sidney poitier - yes , that sidney poitier ) , working with a russian agent , valentina koslova ( diane venora - lady capulet from " romeo + juliet " ) , gives up early on and meets with an ex-ira man , declan mulqueen ( richard gere , putting up some tight competition between himself and brad pitt for worst fake irish accent of '97 ) who's in a massachusetts jail , but who has apparently seen the jackal , who has been eluding the law forever .
soon , he's out working with the two untrusting agents , and trying to help them catch him .
there are numerous problems with the film , and which one is the biggest one is pretty impossible to put a finger on .
the film is supposed to be a big suspense thriller , but save a couple moments , the film never achieves suspense , or even a sense of intrigue .
sure , the big assasination attempt is a bit cool looking and even slightly tense , but every other scene in the film is too short and too dull to register .
the film never picks up enough to become a thrilling experience , or even an entertaining one .
it doesn't help that the plot is designed to be complex , but falls into so many problems , like plot holes and unbelievable circumstances .
the script of " the jackal " is a complete mess , mostly because it can't decide what it wants to focus on .
is this a film about a man trying to find redemption by catching a nasty killer ?
is it a film about a nasty , amoral hitman who's in everything for the money ?
or is it a combination of both ?
" the jackal " aims for the latter , but never focuses in on either character .
the connection between the two feels completely edited , so much that in a scene when the jackal turns around and notices declan , you wonder how he recognized him so fast .
the worst part is the little past they try to give declan , most notably his relationship with an old girlfriend , isabella ( mathilda may ) , given so little screen time that you almost forget her character exists until she pops up every now and then .
the supporting characters are worse .
sidney poitier is given a completely unplayable role , that of a man who is just stern sometimes , and other times more giving and likable .
what is poitier doing here ?
he's one of the best living actors !
does he really need to waste his time doing drivel like this ?
diane venora's russian character is almost as bad , with a cigarette perpetually in her mouth , and a plastered on expressionless facade .
it's not that anyone's bad here ; it's that they have nothing to do .
the plot is a joke , feeling like it was pasted together by someone in post-production who dropped each scene on the floor and pasted them together quickly so it could be released on time .
the jackal himself is not even much of an international villain .
there are several times where he's in a tight situation and makes things worse for himself , the only explanation being that the filmmakers wanted to toss in a cheap thrill .
take a scene where he's being followed by some agents into a parking garage : he quickly sprays his car another color , and adds a solvent that if touched kills the person who touched it .
doesn't killing someone attract more attention than it does distract ?
and does he think dying his hair bottle blond makes him fit in in a public place ?
geez !
is there anything good here ?
well . . . a
couple things .
i did like willis's icy expressions ; he may not have been real suave or anything , but some of his looks are worth a chuckle .
richard gere has a couple of good moments , making his character as likable as he possibly could have .
and a couple sequences are kicky in that kind of proposterous , completely inane but fun kinda way , most notably : a sequence where he tests out a new gun on an annoying gun builder ( jack black ) ; and a bit where he seduces a gay washington man , which has its share of a couple good jokes , most particular a kiss by willis .
but none of these elevate the film any higher than it could go ; they're just little distractions along the way to amuse us mildly then toss us back into the world of dullness and stupidity that is " the jackal . "
director michael caton-jones ( who directed the far superior " rob roy " ) has made a film that is made very couple months , one that is unentertaining , unintriguing , and pretty much cold , but will nevertheless make money because , hey , the trailers do make it look like it may be fun in that kind of retro-clancy kinda way .
every now and then , the filmmakers get it right ( " clear and present danger , " which was enormous fun in that smart kinda way ) , but " the jackal " is an example of when they go completely wrong .
| neg | Negative |
sometimes i find 19th century british costume dramas a little hard to relate to .
it's not the time or the distance , it's the rules and conventions of a social class that deserves resentment rather than sympathy .
yet somehow , the movies are all well made and i always get caught up in the story .
the wings of the dove fits the pattern .
kate ( helena bonham carter ) and merton ( linus roache ) are in love .
merton , a newspaper writer , would like to marry kate .
but kate's " job " , if you will , is to be a member of the british upper class .
her father lost all of her family's money , but a wealthy aunt agreed to take care of her until she married a nice rich man .
naturally , a newspaper writer's wages don't count as " rich . "
kate leads him on , but she always ends up giving him the cold shoulder , ultimately because he's not marriageable .
kate's american friend millie ( alison elliot ) stops in for a visit on her way to venice .
at a party , millie catches a glimpse of merton and likes what she sees .
kate realizes that if merton were introduced to millie , he might forget about her .
it appears that she is trying to spare him from the heartbreak of their inevitable breakup .
merton sees what kate is doing and resents her for it .
he is still in love with kate , and will accept no substitute .
the three of them , along with a fourth friend ( elizabeth mcgovern ) end up on holiday in venice together , where their interactions are quite complicated .
let's sum up : millie has fallen for merton .
merton has no feelings for millie because he is still in love with kate .
kate loves him but can't marry him , so on the one hand she's trying to match him up with someone who will make him happy , but on the other hand she's jealous of them as a couple .
a clear solution presents itself to kate when she realizes that millie is very sick - dying , in fact .
at this point she decides that merton should marry millie until she dies .
millie will leave her money to merton , who will then be rich enough to marry kate .
she lets merton know of her schemes and , since it will help him win kate , he reluctantly agrees .
kate leaves venice so that the two m's can be alone together .
merton finds that pretending to love millie is a lot like actually loving her .
he's not sure he can separate the two .
kate finds that she's not so sure she really wants her merton falling in love with and marrying anyone else .
the brilliant scheme proves to be painful to all involved .
without revealing the details , suffice it to say that the situation ends badly .
the title refers to the object of merton's vain hope that something might lift him from his predicament .
one is left with feelings of regret and despair .
what started as such a promising relationship was damaged by greed , anger , and jealousy .
an interesting thought struck me after the movie was over , and that is that the wings of the dove almost fits the story line of a film noir .
a couple conspires to cheat someone out of their money so they can live happily ever after .
their involvement in the deception makes each less attractive to the other , and after a few things go wrong , the whole idea seems like an awful life-ruining mistake .
i wouldn't call the wings of the dove a film noir , but the comparison is interesting .
as i have acknowledged before , i am not a wonderful judge of acting , but i liked the performances from roache and elliot .
roache successfully conveyed his character's ambivalence toward millie : near the end , he hugs her , at first staring into space , as if he's thinking about his plan with kate , then giving that up to fully embrace millie .
millie's part didn't require as much range , but elliot gave her the necessary bubbly personality that made her irresistible .
i will probably file away the wings of the dove in the same low-traffic corner of my mind as sense and sensibility and persuasion .
their settings are far removed from my personal experience - geographically , historically , and socially .
still , the movies are well made and the stories inevitably win me over .
| pos | Positive |
i remember making a pact , right after `patch adams' , to not be easily be suckered by movies dripping with sentimentality .
but darn it , `music of the heart' is just layered with feel-good material and bright characterizations .
it's hard to dislike a movie that uses such skill with it's manipulation .
in addition , it's also a terrific family film .
this is the true story of violin teacher roberta guaspari , who fought the school board to keep the musical program active in a handful of inner city harlem schools .
it could also be described as `mrs .
streep's opus' .
yes , meryl streep brings her dramatic clout to the demanding role of guaspari , and that brings both good news and bad .
out of the gate , possibly because of her distracting star power and the rushed writing , it is relatively difficult to identify with roberta's character and grasp her academic point-of-view .
she is very strict with her students , but what insight does that create into the story ?
slowly but surely , we begin to recognize the intentions of the character , and show admiration for the thoughtfulness and human feeling that streep has once again applied .
one thoroughly interesting fact about `music of the heart' lies with the unlikely presence in the director's chair : horror veteran wes craven .
after leaving an impression with the `scream' films and the original `nightmare on elm street' , craven has attempted a precarious cross-over to drama .
at first , his inexperience with the genre is fairly obvious , but as the film progresses craven finds a surprisingly comfortable niche with directing this material .
it doesn't carry the heart-warming courage of `mr .
holland's opus' , but `music of the heart' is casually assured and filled with little morsels of dramatic truth .
the tag team of streep and craven works better than you would anticipate .
yes , oscar could come calling once again for meryl streep , but it's the solid ensemble cast that makes `music of the heart' work .
angela bassett displays her usual forceful stamina as janet williams , the principal at an inner city school who initially doesn't hire roberta because of her lack of experience .
blue-eyed adian quinn is endearing , as always , playing a new love interest .
gloria estefan also delivers in the tiny role of a supportive second-grade teacher , and the three lead actresses together produce a flaming fireball of estrogenic force .
it's like a schoolteacher's version of `thelma and louise' , in a restrained but effective manner .
the movie tackles more issues than just guaspari's teaching of violin .
there's some powerful moments between roberta and her two sons , who must cope when their father leaves them for another woman .
in it's dramatic build-up , the movie manages to produce some authentic moments of feeling and warmth .
it's a good movie for anyone to see , although missing out on the experience would not be a life-altering decision .
it's commendable of wes craven to be attempting such a difficult cross-over , and also for achieving his intricate goal .
watching this heartfelt chick flick about morals and musical instruments , who may ask yourself : this is the guy who directed `scream' ?
of course , when the third installment of that series comes around in february 2000 ( with craven directing ) , you may find yourself wondering : this is the guy who directed `music of the heart' ?
mission accomplished , wes .
thankfully , there is no layer of artificial sentiment covering the film .
in it's entirety , it's a wholesome and agreeable movie for the whole family , despite the periodic flaws that surface every once in awhile .
the child actors are cute and perform up to par , even if some of their problems are clich ? d and predictable in the extreme .
the mother who doesn't want her son to be learning `white man's music' , the unexpected casuality . . .
basically everything is there .
it doesn't strike the perfect chord , but `music of the heart' is highly convincing .
the uplifting true story of roberta guaspari could have been told better , but `music of the heart' is still edifying enough to properly divulge her morals .
| pos | Positive |
it's tough to really say something nice about a type of person who's so ethnocentric that any humanity they once had is now gone , but by god , " american history x " does it , and for that , i commend it .
it not only takes balls but intelligence to make a human being out of a neo-nazi skinhead , a kind of person who dedicates their lives to hating anyone who's not what they are , and this film wisely and miracurously pulls it off .
the subject of this film is one of them , but he is worse than one of the blind followers that make up most skinhead members since he is the leader of the pack .
he's the one who instigates them to take a firm grip onto their rage , and then in another brilliant stroke , justifies it with political propoganda that makes eerie sense when he speaks .
he's so utterly convincing as a public speaker and so firm in his convictions that it comes as a shock when he actually goes through the rehabilitation process .
his name is derek vinyard , and he's played by edward norton with so much fire and intensity that when he speaks he's almost as convincing and arresting a public speaker as , say , malcom x . when we first see him , he's clean shaven , with a jet black swastica emrboidered on his left breast , a devlish goatee , and he's attacking the black carjackers outside of his house dressed in nothing but his white boxers and carrying a handgun in his hand that never seems to run out of bullets , at least when he doesn't need them .
he so believes in his convictions that he's willing to put his beliefs to the test , even if he knows it will mean a stop in prison , if only for a couple years .
" american history x " is about derek , how he became a neo-nazi skinhead , how he rose to power , how he was rehabilitated in prison after murdering two black men in a fit of rage that was less to do with the stealing of his car and more to do with proving himself , and how he tried to save others , namely his younger brother , from making the same mistake .
we see him at all of these stages - as a smart teenager , a vicious hate monger , a man having an epiphany , and the man who tries to correct what he's done before - and in all of these , we get a portrait of a man from all sides .
or at least , that's the intention .
the film's framing device is his brother , danny ( edward furlong , perpetually looking about 13 ) , also now a skinhead , and how his principal , bob sweeney ( avery brooks , who i just found out was or is the captain on star trek's deep space 9 ) , is trying to " correct " him .
when the film opens , danny has just written a book report on " mein kampf , " landing him in trouble with sweeney , which causes him to make him write a paper on derek's life and how it has gotten him nowhere .
coincidentally , this day is the day derek is released from prison , and when we see him , he's cleaned-up , not as buff , and has a full head of hair .
he's just as intelligent , but still very rough along the edges , but he's wisened up .
he's no longer controlled by his anger at blacks and jews , and tries to persuade danny , who's becoming what derek was before , to give up his lifestyle .
but danny won't .
he goes to a large skinhead beer bash , meets with the skinhead leader ( stacy keach ) , and then discovers that derek is as opposed to neo-nazi-dom as he was for it a couple of years ago .
the film circles around this , then spins off into non-linear flashbacks , all done in black and white .
we mostly see derek at his prime as a skinhead , living in venice beach , organizing vicious and quasi-sadistic raids on local stores that no longer hire the white , middle-class teenagers since they can easily get cheaper illegal immigrants to do the same work , and mouthing off his theories on affirmative action and how illegal immigrants and blacks have destroyed the fundamentals this country was built on .
to them , the white man is the one who has gotten the fuzzy end of the lolipop , and he not only speaks elloquently , forcefully , and intelligently , but he backs everything up with political reasons , justifying their rage at least to them .
and frighteningly enough , much of what he says sounds true .
" american history x " is a collection of really great scenes and moments , rather than a cohesive , great film that flows effortlessly from one moment to the next .
in it , there are some of the best scenes i've seen all year .
one scene features a dinner between derek's family , and his mother's newest boyfriend ( played with reserve by eliott gould ) , a jewish liberal who quietly disagrees with derek's rightist views , launching the scene into a fit of rage and anger that builds unparalled emotions in the audience ( gould's reaction to derek's final summation is unnerrving ) .
another scene uses humor and traditional macho sex talk to build a friendship and a nice connection between derek and a black co-worker ( guy torry ) while folding laundry in prison .
and another soon-to-be-classic is actually divided in two : the murder of the two black men that winds derek in jail , which contains a final murder so nasty that it may be the most revoltingly shocking all year .
there's much more to appreciate , like the acting , which is uniformly good , with stand-outs coming from avery brooks , beverly d'angelo ( as the long-suffering mother ) , and gould ( who has one horrible line , but other than that , comes off with the best performance he's given in what seems like a really long time ) .
norton walks off with the film , though , coming off with such intensity that he reduces anyone not doing an adequate job to rubble .
in only the fifth movie of his career , norton has invented himself as one of the most reliable and intense actors of his generation , and maybe the best .
there's nothing like it when norton really gets rolling in this movie , spewing out lines with such authority that he commands all attention from the audience , coming off with power similar to that of a young maron brando .
that he allows the little emotions to seep through is amazing .
sadly enough , this isn't going to be the great portrait of racism that it perhaps hopes to be .
it's too unambitious and even a little contrived to really take off as either a powerful statement or an emotional masterpiece .
the ending , especially , is pencilled in from other movies , tossed in just so the emotional keyboard can be trounced upon .
some of the skinheads are reduced to mere cliches ( kevin smith regular ethan suplee fairs rather annoyingly as the " fat skinhead , " whose lines consist without fail of expressing his desire to eat more ) , and even the dramatic arc isn't as well travelled .
furlong's danny never seems to really be learning a lesson , since the flashbacks refuse to show his point of view , and when he decides to make a change by the end ( which was inevitable ) , it doesn't seem like it has actually arrived there .
even derek's descent into skinhead-dom doesn't seem justified .
though his fireman father ( william russ , the dad from " boy meets world , " and don't ask me how i know that ) is killed by a black junkie , and even before he spoke against affirmative action intelligently , there never seems to be any real back story why derek became so intense about his beliefs .
as such , one can see why the director , tony kaye , wanted to have his name removed .
sorta .
" american history x " is a very good movie , and i was very moved by it , but it could be a lot better , and the problem seems to be that the cut as it is is not up to what he claims to be his potential .
somewhere , he claims , there lies a tony kaye cut , and that was to be the true cut until it was viewed by norton , who then ordered another cut , and that is thus .
although he aimed for the directing credit to go to " alan smithee , " the resident name for any film that is to be disowned by its director , it wasn't allowed to him , under the grounds that once you disown a film , you can not badmouth it ( but really , that's the macguffin - no one really wanted a film this good to be given the alan smithee sign of disapproval ) .
kaye's right in that it's not up to par , even if he's not referring to normal par but rather his own personal par .
this will not be a " do the right thing " for the late 90s .
yet it still gets its point across intelligently , and backs it up with its story ( its message , that one cannot be so enwrapped in one's own beliefs or pain and suffering will occur , is literally said over the narration , unfortunately ) .
and even if it isn't perfect , at least when avery brooks turns to norton after he has been beaten and raped in prison , and asks him if anything he's done has made his life any better , it realy hits a nerve , not only in derek , but also in the audience .
| pos | Positive |
perhaps the most dramatic changes in the motion picture industry in this decade have to do with special effects .
there is no question that action-adventure and science-fiction/action movies are now judged by the character of their light and noise .
whereas classic adventure pics of the last twenty years , such as raiders of the lost ark , were made in grand traditional fashion ; contemporary films like jurassic park are multimillion-dollar creations of computer technology .
the latest in this visually awesome series of movies , the wachowski brothers' the matrix , is a testament to the skilled use of special effects and its ability to enhance a movie's story .
unlike many sci-fi movies which promote themselves as effects-heavy blockbusters but fail to deliver on that promise , the matrix is a carefully constructed special effects event .
it runs 135 minutes in length and employs a countless number of computerized tricks which range from gimmick to grandiose , and the quality of the effects remains constant throughout the film's length .
contrary to popular trend , the matrix commits itself to being a spectacle of light and sound .
in this regard , the movie is something like a card sharp .
with its flashy mass stripped away , the matrix would be quite shallow and untalented .
the script is characteristically weak , and the dialogue suffers in lieu of a far more innovative visual approach .
but , like the card sharp , the matrix wows its audience to such a high degree that actual content is irrelevent .
the viewers don't care about what the matrix has to say as long as the next special effects sequence is right around the corner .
and right around the corner they usually are , for the script tells a fast-paced , albeit frequently revisited story .
as the movie explains , the world as we know it is nothing but an elaborate computer program constructed by an artificial intelligence for the purpose of placating mankind .
billions of human beings lie in this dormant state while the intelligence -- the matrix -- " farms " our life energy .
only a select group of individuals knows of the " real " world , and a particularly ingenious squad of these rebels is led by ultra-cool morpheus ( laurence fishburne ) .
morpheus and his crew recruit a computer expert named neo ( keanu reeves ) , believing he is a prophesied individual who will help them overthrow the matrix and return peace to earth .
the cast plays out this story in stylish fashion .
the set design is very dynamic , running the gambit between cramped and dreary to bright and airy .
the costumes , as well as the actors who wear them , add to the roles .
for instance , the manifested antagonists in the movie , a group of " agents " created by the matrix in its computer program , all dress in matching secret servicewear ; the rebel fighters , on the other hand , dress in rich hues of leather .
the casting cannot be criticized , for the typically stoic reeves isn't required to say much and laurence fishburne gets plenty of time to be so damn cool .
supports in carrie-anne moss , joe pantoliano , and hugo weaving are all effectual .
one of the best comparisons to thw matrix is last year's science fiction masterpiece dark city , particularly if one ponders how this same premise would've worked from a different approach .
the alex proyas film was far more dark and introspective , requiring a bit of thought before themes became clear ; here , the wachowski brothers have managed to construct a thrill-ride motion picture with little abandon and much noise .
the better picture between the two depends on the viewer , but the key to the success of the matrix is that the noise did not get in the way of the fun .
| pos | Positive |
originally launched in 1978 , this popular film was re-introduced in 1998 to a whole new generation of moviegoers .
based on the mighty successful musical from broadway , grease was followed in 1980 with the less stellar grease 2 ( 6 . 5/10 ) ,
starring a young michelle pheiffer in one of her first feature film roles .
plot : high-school musical set in the 1950's showcasing the relationship between the cool danny zuko of the t-birds ( travolta ) and the innocent and pure sandy olsen ( newton-john ) from australia .
the film follows the couple and their vivacious friends during their last year at rydell high through song , dance and humour .
critique : fun-loving , energetic and innocent look back at times much simpler .
this movie effectively juggles a thin romantic story line and the overall experience of the 1950's , with a superb soundtrack and some great dance numbers .
admittedly , i am somewhat biased in this opinion , since this film blasts me into my past as a rebellious youth ( grease was one of schmoe's first big-screen experiences , and every other scene sends me reeling into the times of my elaborate grease bubble-gum card collection ) , and the lesser responsibilities that i possessed at that time .
but apart from the nostalgic vibe , i was still extremely impressed by this film , as it continued to amuse me , despite my previous dozen or so viewings .
this film took john travolta from a dim-witted " sweathog " on tv's welcome back kotter , and transformed him into a movie-star of spectacular proportions ( saturday night fever ( 7 . 5/10 ) in 1979 confirmed that sudden popularity ) .
unfortunately for the rest of the cast , his popularity was not terribly contagious , despite their effective showings in this classic movie .
on the down side , some of the absolute innocence in this film might bore or turn people off ( like when sandy sings about " drinking lemonade " and " staying out until 10 " with danny in " summer nights " ) , and the plot isn't exactly the most elaborate story-line ever created , but despite these small reservations , this movie carries enough great music and high energy to keep anyone amused through its rapid 110 minute running time ( and believe me . . . i
am not a fan of the musicals ! ! ) .
make sure to look for a young lorenzo lamas in the static role of the brainless football player , as well as the national bandstand dance contest as one of the film's absolute highlights .
and don't forget to buy the popular soundtrack afterwards , so that you could listen to its peppy tunes whenever you're feeling a little blue .
little known facts : henry winkler , of tv's happy days' fonzie fame , turned down the part of danny zuko because he did not want to be typecast for the rest of his career .
both travolta and conaway were smitten by newton-john during the filming of this picture .
conaway eventually bowed out of the woo-fest , and married newton-john's sister a year later ( divorced after five years ) .
| pos | Positive |
from a major league baseball radio broadcast , featuring play-by- play man harry canary and color man whitey hashbrown , with special guest commentator james berardinelli .
hc : as we go to the top of the 8th , we're joined in the booth by film critic james berardinelli , who's here fresh from seeing the new baseball movie , major league : back to the minors , the third in the popular saga taking a lighter look at the majors .
nice to see you , jim .
as a big baseball fan and a movie reviewer , can you give us the scoop on the new flick ?
jb : my opinion : the producers should have stopped while they were ahead , and that was nine years ago .
one entry was definitely enough , and i'm surprised there was a third after the anemic showing and low quality of major league 2 . this latest installment has all the earmarks of something that should have been released direct-to-video .
it's worse than a mediocre made-for-tv feature .
i should also mention that this movie likely won't play all that well in cleveland .
now that the real indians are perennial contenders , they have been replaced by the minnesota twins as the cinematic sadsacks .
actually , most of the action involves the twins' aaa minor league club , the buzz , rather than the actual major league franchise .
hc : sorry to interrupt , jim , but we still have to do play-by-play for the game on the field .
leading off this inning is john warren .
he steps into the batter's box and takes kent's pitch low for ball one .
wh : so , the story's strictly minor league , right ?
what's it about ?
jb : scott bakula , the guy from quantum leap , plays career minor league pitcher gus cantrell .
when twins owner roger dorn , once again portrayed by corbin bernsen , needs a new manager for his aaa team , he offers the job to gus , who is now faced with two daunting tasks : turn the team around and groom hot prospect downtown anderson ( played by walt goggins ) for a promotion to " the show . "
with the help of former major leaguers pedro cerrano ( dennis haysbert ) , rube baker ( eric bruskotter ) , and isuro tanaka ( takaaki ishibashi ) , gus gets the buzz on the right track .
in fact , he is so successful that he earns the enmity of the jealous manager of the big-league club , leonard huff ( played with over-the-top relish by ted mcginley ) .
soon , dorn has arranged an exhibition game that pits gus' overachieving group against huff's overpaid , last-place bunch .
wh : can we guess who wins ?
jb : the results have all the suspense of watching the videotape of a game when you've already seen the box score .
on top of that , none of the mock-ups are presented with much flair .
they're not just boring ; they're lackluster .
but the major league movies have never been about drama or tension ; they've been about using baseball situations to generate laughs .
hc : warren fouls off a fastball .
1 and 1 .
wh : are there lots of yuks in this one ?
jb : not one , from start to finish .
i enjoyed the first major league because it was reasonably fresh and funny .
okay , a lot of the jokes were sophomoric , but they made me laugh .
the two sequels haven't just been stale , but their humor quotient has been abysmally low .
even bob uecker's once-sharp one-liners have turned lame , and they're the closest the film comes to being even vaguely amusing .
hc : here's the 1-1 pitch .
looooooong drive ? fair or foul ? foul ball !
the count goes to 1 and 2 .
wh : does the film at least get the baseball details correct ?
jb : yes .
there aren't any glaring errors like there were in one of the best-ever baseball movies , the natural .
but i'd gladly trade a technically accurate film for one with a good story , believable characters , or even a little genuine humor .
heck , the naked gun is a better baseball comedy than major league : back to the minors .
wh : it's nice to see old friends one more time , isn't it ?
like cerrano , tanaka , and dorn .
jb : depends on whether you really care that anyone is back .
there aren't any real characters here ? just an assortment of cliched oddballs .
yeah , the voodoo hitter , the catcher who can't throw back to the pitcher , the japanese player , and the conceited player-turned-owner have all returned , but who really cares ?
they have no depth .
notable absences include tom berenger's veteran and charlie sheen's " wild thing . "
we don't really miss them , though .
hc : breaking ball , low and outside .
2 and 2 .
wh : so you're saying that we should give this one a miss ?
jb : that's right .
to use baseball terminology , it's a three-pitch strikeout .
if you're looking for a good movie that involves baseball , try popping the natural , field of dreams , bull durham , or even the first major league into the vcr .
actually , this is an oddly-timed release , since baseball fans are likely to be spending more time in parks than in theaters .
even the minor league seasons are already underway .
don't bother with major league : back to the minors .
it's a wretched time- waster .
wh : thanks for the advice .
jb : you're welcome .
hc : and here's the 2-2 pitch .
fouled back , right into this booth .
hey , jim , heads up !
oops .
somebody better get him some ice for that .
he may be good at deflecting bad baseball movies , but he needs to learn not to duck into foul balls .
odd how warren seemed to aim that ball right at him , almost as if he has a grudge to settle .
anyway , back to the action on the field ?
| neg | Negative |
brian de palma's snake eyes stars nicolas cage's evil twin , who confusingly uses the same stage name as his talented brother .
like a foreign tourist who screams his lines in english to ensure that he will be understood , cage yells with the ferocity of a man with a bad case of caffeine overload .
de palma , whose last great film , the untouchables , was crafted over a decade ago seems to have lost his magic .
in snake eyes , he manages to elicit some of the worst performances possible out of a skilled cast .
only gary sinise rises slightly above the hackneyed material .
the rest of the actors become caricatures in this by-the-numbers thriller .
ryuichi sakamoto's atmospheric and melodramatic music dominates almost every scene .
heavy on the long violin notes , its rhythm is punctuated by thunder .
( the script by de palma and lost world's david koepp sets the action during a hurricane in an attempt to pump up the adrenaline level and the noise .
only the latter is achieved . )
cage plays rick santoro , a corrupt atlantic city cop who shakes down criminals to get betting money .
the movie takes place over a single evening when a world championship fight is being held .
with a flashy , bad wardrobe and a gold cell phone , rick is an obnoxious cop who doesn't know when to shut up .
spouting cliched and ridiculous dialog , he screams such lines as , " i was made for the sewer , baby ! "
actually the line is more apropos for the movie as a whole .
sinise plays kevin dunne , a naval officer who is in charge of the security for the secretary of the navy , who has come to watch the fight .
but most people in the film are not who they seem to be , and the thin script makes all of them easy to guess .
the plot , which is told in endless flashbacks , concerns the assassination of the secretary through a scheme set up by some malevolent businessmen ? that adjective is , of course , redundant in hollywood thrillers .
the flashbacks become repetitious with the same scene shown again and again , sometimes from a different perspective and sometimes not .
although a brian de palma film requires a certain amount of gratuitous violence , this one is remarkably tame for the man who became famous when he made carrie .
the movie's outline has some promise , but the movie itself is leaden .
the film takes itself all too seriously .
at best , it is a 1940s-style b movie .
a little humor would have helped the script some , but a complete rewrite would have been better .
and , although i hate to say it , a different director would have been the biggest improvement .
snake eyes runs 1 : 39 .
it is rated r for violence and would be acceptable for teenagers .
| neg | Negative |
american pie acknowledges a cold , hard fact that most movies don't : it is very difficult to get laid .
its four virgin heroes are jim ( biggs ) , a chronic masturbator , kev ( nicholas ) , who desperately wants to deflower his girlfriend ( reid ) , oz ( klein ) , a lacrosse player whose approach requires some fine tuning , and finch ( eddie kaye thomas ) , a germphobe ( his crass nickname is hilarious , but i won't spoil it here ) who pays a classmate to spread rumours about the size of his member .
jim , kev , oz and finch attend a high school in suburban michigan full of so many impossibly beautiful women it's no wonder they're horny all the time .
after a party at their studly friend stifler's ( seann william scott , in the film's sharpest performance ) house leaves them sexually unsatisfied , the quartet make a pact : to " lose it " by graduation-specifically , prom night , which is only a few weeks away .
american pie is in the tradition of bachelor party or revenge of the nerds .
almost every conversation these characters have revolves around makin' whoopee .
all women are there to be ogled .
( alyson hannigan's perky music student is the only memorable female of the bunch . )
situations abound that defy logic only to arouse and/or amuse its core audience , adolescent boys .
( to arouse : nadia's ( shannon elizabeth ) internet striptease-an unexpectedly raucous ( and guiltily pleasurable ) sequence .
to amuse : jim's lusty encounter with a hot apple pie . )
what differentiates american pie from those dirty eighties comedies , aside from a very nineties obsession with bodily fluids * , is a cast that's light years more appealing than that of , say , just one of the guys .
two more standouts : klein and " sctv " 's eugene levy .
klein plays a kind-hearted athlete for the second time in a row , after alexander payne's underappreciated election .
i hope to see more of this warm actor with the disarmingly honest face very soon .
levy's is the most crowd-pleasing performance , and indeed , it's nice to see him back on the big screen in a role that makes wonderful use of that expressive brow .
american pie also wants to emulate the teen flicks your parents _would_ let you watch growing up .
it skillfully employs a broad mix of pop tunes , much like john hughes' movies did , and even pays homage to the breakfast club a couple of times , most evidently when the prom band covers simple minds' " don't you ( forget about me ) . "
the picture ultimately has a healthy , if obligatory , attitude towards safe sex-even at their most libidinous , american pie's protagonists first whip out a condom .
the filmmakers prove that socially responsible raunch is possible .
for its familiarity and for its charming leads , i recommend american pie , but the buzz on this film had me expecting something . . . fresher .
as far as the new teen cinema goes , it's at the top of the heap .
* don't say i didn't warn you about the party scene .
| pos | Positive |
one of my colleagues was surprised when i told her i was willing to see betsy's wedding .
and she was shocked to hear that i actually liked it .
her reaction was understandable when you consider that the film revolves around molly ringwald , who hasn't made a worthwhile film since 1986 .
but the fact is , betsy's wedding is also an alan alda film .
and while ringwald has been making duds for the last four years , alda has been involved with several noteworthy projects , including crimes and misdemeanors and a new life .
written and directed by alda , betsy's wedding is a vibrant slice-of-life , mixing a few dramatic moments into a big bowl of whimsical humor .
alda's comic elixir is smooth and refreshing--and a welcome change of pace from the usual summer fare .
as bride and groom , molly ringwald and dylan walsh are the pivotal characters in the film , but they are by far the least interesting .
walsh is a nonentity , with all the screen presence of a door knob .
ringwald is simply unbearable and is easily the weakest link in the chain .
she looks hideous with her short-cropped orange hair , red lip-stick and grotesque outfits .
she's supposed to be a dress designer , but she looks more like a clown .
and to make matters worse , ringwald's performance matches her appearance .
thankfully , alda keeps ringwald's screen time to a minimum ; he is far more interested in the colorful periphery characters .
the wedding is just a device to bring together the bride's working-class , italian family and the groom's rich , gentile family .
ringwald's folks are homey and down-to-earth , with alda as her free-spirited father , madeline kahn as her practical mother , and ally sheedy as her lonely sister .
walsh's clan , on the other hand , is prim , proper and ostentatious .
when the two families meet and mingle , the movie becomes a story of culture clash , or as one character puts it , " money versus values . "
ally sheedy , in a wonderfully understated performance , is one of the film's most pleasant surprises .
sheedy expresses more with just her eyes than ringwald does with her entire body .
it's anthony lapaglia , however , who seizes the spotlight .
lapaglia plays stevie dee , a suave , overly polite mafioso who is formally courting sheedy with old-fashioned chivalry .
lapaglia's sincere but dim-witted character is a riot .
and what's uncanny is that lapaglia is a dead ringer for robert de niro , with a little bit of alec baldwin thrown in for good measure .
lapaglia seems to have attended the de niro school of gangster acting , and his inspired performance is partly a tribute to his role-model and partly a rip-off .
i don't know whether to say a star is born or a star is re-born , but i do know that lapaglia's over-the-top performance should not be missed .
the scrumptious comic acting , however , extends well beyond sheedy and lapaglia .
joe pesci , in particular , sinks his teeth into his role as alda's unscrupulous brother-in-law , a slum lord with mob ties , who is cheating on his wife ( catherine o'hara ) .
alda , faced with challenge of both directing and acting , somehow finds just the right comic touch as the bride's financially-strapped father , a carpenter whose dreams are bigger than his wallet .
the film adopts alda's psychological point of view as he tries to one : plan the wedding , and two : pay for it .
as a filmmaker , alda's style of humor is remarkably restrained and tasteful .
and while he doesn't have the comic genius of a woody allen , alda does possess the inspiration to make movies which are ten times more entertaining than the slop which usually passes for comedy .
| pos | Positive |
mickey mouse had better watch his back -- there's a new critter in town , and he's the nameless animal attraction of " mouse hunt , " dreamworks skg's clever first foray into family fare .
although it runs out of steam towards its end , this live-action comedy still boasts enough energized slapstick and inventive set pieces to best disney's entire 1997 non-animated , kiddie-oriented catalog . . .
but consider that list includes dismal tripe like " air bud , " " flubber " and " that darn cat , " and it's really not such a difficult feat to pull off .
still , throw the two rodents in a boxing arena , and i'll be hoping that the mouse from " mouse hunt " knocks some sense back into mickey .
nathan lane ( robin williams' significant other from " the birdcage " ) and lee evans ( last seen as a nervous bellhop in " the fifth element " ) play ernie and lars smuntz , befuddled brothers who have just inherited two unwanted assets from their late father ( william hickey , in his last role ) -- a dilapidated old string factory and a dilapidated old mansion .
although lars made a deathbed promise to upkeep the former , he and ernie decide to sell the latter for big bucks after learning it was designed by a famed architect .
but there's a lone obstacle in their way -- a single mouse lives within the walls of the house , and he's not about to give up his place of residence without a fight .
movies aimed at young audiences are rarely this visually exquisite .
the effects blending the talents of 60-some live mice , one animatronic mouse and one computer-generated mouse are pretty seamless .
the splendid production design seems to be straight out of tim burton's mind ; the smuntz's architecturally-unsound mansion is like something straight out of " the nightmare before christmas , " and the vortex of bizarre machinery in their factory resembles some of vincent price's warped contraptions from " edward scissorhands . "
" mouse hunt " is a pretty dark movie -- even some of the humor can be grim -- but it's hardly ever mean-spirited .
the star of the show is neither the top-billed lane nor the titular mouse .
it's lanky british comedian evans , whose hysterical bodily antics suggest a cleaned-up jim carrey without the obnoxious overkill ( note a toned-down but nonetheless outrageous impromptu striptease ) ; evans' banter with the ever-affable lane is funny stuff , too , and holds its own against the movie's more flashy physical shtick .
vicki lewis ( beth from " newsradio " ) is solid in a supporting role as lars' money-grubbing wife .
and in a nifty bit of novelty casting , christopher walken is a macabre delight as a spooky exterminator who takes his job a little too seriously , popping a dropping into his mouth and noting to his tape recorder that the mouse has a " calcium deficiency . "
blech .
a basically one-joke idea -- a mouse outsmarts a couple of bumbling humans -- is given a rather engaging execution .
their sparring is imaginatively realized ( i don't think i'll ever forget the sight of that tiny little mouse making his getaway on a rolling wheel of gouda ) , and although you really never fully root for either side , that's okay -- a warm-and-fuzzy union between the two parties is practically promised from the first frame they share .
" mouse hunt " may take a while to get going ( the rather lengthy set-up could test the patience of some of the younger children , although i rather liked it , much in part to lane and evans ) , and the climactic sequence is allowed to play out for a bit too long , but this appears to be one family movie that most members of the family will be able to find agreeable , not unlike the original " home alone . "
| pos | Negative |
house on haunted hill ( 1999 ) starring taye diggs , geoffrey rush , ali larter , famke janssen , peter gallagher , bridgette wilson , max perlich , lisa loeb , james marsters , and chris kattan .
directed by william malone , written by dick beebe ,
" house on haunted hill " initializes itself to the audience with a scene involving zombie-like mental patients attacking and murdering doctors in the goriest ways possible .
one doctor is killed instantly after having a pencil rammed completely through his neck .
a nurse has her head forced into a barrel of water .
these mobs of zombies presented are like those in previous b-horror flicks , with grunting noises and cadaverous movements .
except this time , at the end of the millenium , the film is given the power to show exactly how horrific these creatures can be .
in past horror films , the actual murder scenes are left out or not shown forcing the viewer to assume their own nasty bloody deaths for the hapless victims .
" house on haunted hill " doesn't want their audience to have an imagination , everything is provided for them to watch and squirm , not think .
this nonsense violence thrown out of nowhere is unfortunately the most refreshing part about this film .
" house on haunted hill " , which is based on the 1958 film of the same title , introduces a handful of characters as quickly as it can , following the opening blood fest .
the film has no intention of providing character development or a laudable plot .
the aim here is to scare the audience with chilling , unexpected shots of blood , guts , and mayhem .
however , the film is neither scary nor unpredictable .
the plot involves five people who are dared to spend the night in a haunted house for one million dollars by an amusement park owner ( geoffrey rush ) .
each character is a failure in the external world and acknowledges that they would do anything for that money .
since the characters are immediately generalized as either greedy or caring , the expectations of who will survive or not is killed five minutes after you meet them .
the problem is that every character is not likable .
the two who come closest to being civilized are a womanizer ( taye diggs - who should be doing films a lot better than this with all of his talent ) and a businesswoman who accepts being womanized ( ali larter ) .
the characters presented are so annoying and pathetic , that it is hard to cheer for them or scream them .
the worst character in this film , or maybe in any film released this year , is chris kattan's watson pritchett .
he spends the whole film whining about the spooky house in a tone so irritating and inappropriate , that he unintentionally begins to seem more evil than the house itself .
waiting for pritchett to die , was a strenuously difficult act to sit through .
the most humorous actor of the bunch is geoffrey rush playing steven price ( an homage to victor price who starred in the original ) .
playing the rich man who supposedly organized the party , he plays the role perfectly in a twisted way where it is obvious that he is up to something just by the expressions on his face .
however , rush is pretty much wasted in a confusing subplot involving a hateful marriage with evelyn price , played by famke janssen .
the main problem is that " house on haunted hill " is not scary .
to top off that huge disappointment , every actor was wasted and the script was completely ludicrous .
if the annoying characters and hilariously bad dialogue were intentionally underdeveloped ( similar to " deep blue sea " ) , the goal for creating a creepy , suspenseful action film was completely missed .
| neg | Negative |
scream 2 has a titillating little scene that lays down the unwritten law of horror movie sequels quite well .
during a film-class discussion , windsor college students articulate what these inevitable laws are , and why sequels never live up to the originals .
a few rare exceptions are noted , but they left out one .
.
.
scream 2 !
1996's surprise horror blockbuster scream became an instant hit and developed an obsessive coterie of fans which included almost every teenager in america !
a sequel was unavoidable , but luckily the re-teaming of writer kevin williamson and director wes craven gives us nothing to fear in the way of lost entertainment .
in fact , at the risk of sounding sacrilegious to all the adorning fans of scream , i would say that scream 2 might even be the better film !
sidney prescott ( neve campbell ) , the sinuous heroine who survived a series of murders in woodsboro , ca in the original scream , is now two years older and off to college , majoring in theater .
meanwhile , tv journalist gale weathers ( courtney cox ) , who covered the murders in the first film , has since written a book about the dreadful events ; a book titled " stab " , which has been developed into a major motion picture .
as scream 2 opens , a crowd of overzealous teenagers are piling into a crowded movie theater for the premiere of " stab " , and before long , a young couple are butchered to death , unnoticed in the midst of hysteria .
this marks the beginning of a new murder spree as an unknown " copycat " sets out to repeat what's been done .
.
.
and finish what hasn't !
of course the killer is just as obsessed with movies as the killer in the first film , and yes , movies play a huge role in the bizarre psychological outlook the murderer holds as he/she goes about slaying an assortment of gorgeous twenty year olds , but this * is * a sequel , and without deviating from the original groundwork we are still given a fresh outlook on horror movies .
this is in large part due to williamson's deliciously written script , which will easily leave you satisfied .
as much as the film condemns the use of cliches , it is riddled with them , but it is done so effectively , and with skillful direction by craven , that you're not bound to complain .
i will note , however , that the " whodunit ? "
did wind up being the first person i suspected , but believe me , i kept changing my mind as i tried to stay one ahead of the movie .
all the actors outdo themselves here .
we're not talking oscar performances , but cambell , cox , david arquette as dewey riley , and jamie kennedy as randy all give surprisingly satisfying performances that go beyond their last outing .
the characters remain true to their roots , and yet show a clear sign of development over the last two years .
we can see how the events in the first film has affected them , but we don't lose any of the luster that made them such a delight to watch in the first place .
the nice thing about scream 2 is that it doesn't seem off-kilter from it's predecessor .
it's a natural , smooth , and believable ( as far as horror films go ) transition from film to film .
we skip two years , but there doesn't seem to be any holes or shortcuts taken in connecting the two flicks .
it flows so well that you feel more like you're reading chapter two of a book ( long chapters , eh ? )
than just revitalizing a cast of familiar faces .
while main characters are usually the only connection in sequels , scream 2's entire plot structure correlates * completely * with the first , making for immediate fondness and absorption .
as i said before , scream 2 easily lives up to , if not surpassing , it's precursor .
the only reason scream will likely be hailed above scream 2 is because it was the first .
this doesn't mean that it overcasts the unique , whimsical humor or overall caliber of it's sequel , it just means that scream will forever be known as the movie that mocked it's own while maintaining it's sought-after qualities .
if ever a film followed it's original so well , it would be scream 2 , and it makes this a definite must-see for all those unbridled scream fans out there .
scream 2 fits snugly alongside scream , and will hopefully receive as many high remarks .
it would top off the series quite well , if it weren't for the fact that two movies don't really make a series .
it's unlikely to assume that a scream 3 won't appear in the next few years , but if they do decide to turn this into an undeniably acclaimed horror-trilogy , let's hope they can keep up the fantastic work .
like they say , don't mess with perfection .
.
.
but when a money-making smash-hit is almost guaranteed , who's gonna listen ?
| pos | Positive |
with his successful books and movies , michael crichton is doing well .
with early successes with westworld ( 1973 ) and coma ( 1978 ) , and recent films such as jurassic park ( 1993 ) , his films have been entertaining .
however , he seems to taken a wrong turn somewhere with sphere .
this $100 million mess by good director barry levison ( disclosure ) is dull , long winded , and a huge disappointment .
considering the huge budget , the all star cast , and a story by crichton , sphere is majorly disappointing .
the film opens with norman goodman ( hoffman ) , a psychologist who thinks he is visiting an airplane crash to console the survivors .
however , when he arrives , he his told by supervisor barnes ( peter coyote ) that he is actually investigating an spacecraft .
along with goodman is mathematician harry adams ( jackson ) , biologist beth halperin ( stone ) and ted fielding ( liev schrieber . )
they investigate the spaceship , find a massive sphere inside , meet an alien intelligence called jerry , and basically weird crap happens .
unfortunately , something went wrong along the way with sphere .
the film starts off entertaining enough , but throughout this very long movie , it just gets sillier and sillier .
the film jaunts along from scene to scene , never fully explaining what is going on .
the actors and directing don't help , either .
hoffman is on autopilot ( and almost seems embarrassed ) throughout the movie , churning out dull lines , and probably wondering what the hell he is doing in this movie .
stone is useless , displaying no emotion , and fails to convince the audience that she has any feelings for hoffman .
the only person who seems to be having fun in this movie is jackson , who's funny as the mathematician who slowly goes crazy and entering the sphere .
but he's hardly in it , and by the end of the film he is just as dull as hoffman and stone .
the same goes for peter coyote , who hams it up as the officer , but is then killed off halfway through .
the director , barry levinson , who directed the better crichton adaptation disclosure ( 1994 ) messes up with the drama and the action .
the drama scenes are , quite frankly , boring , and the action scenes suffer from overkill , with levison throwing the camera all over the place ( much like the godawful speed 2 , 1997 )
the writing doesn't help much , either .
although crichton is great with plots , he's terrible with dialogue , and practically every line in sphere is a dud .
the speech is too simple , i was hoping it would be a bit more intelligent .
practically every line is just stating the obvious .
none of it is smart .
also , where the hell did the budget go ?
the sphere itself is impressive , and there's a few nice special effect shots , but where the $100 million went is anyone's guess .
there's a giant squid attack in the picture , but not once does the audience see the squid , even though the film has a massive budget .
i assume the picture was trying to build up tension by not showing the squid , and if handled correctly it probably would .
but the whole scene is done badly , and i was just hoping we could see the stupid squid .
finally , the film has no idea what genre to be .
levison can't handle his own plot .
it leaps from hokey sci-fi , to horror , and finally the shining/event horizon psychological thriller .
and , of course , the film is very much like the abyss ( 1988 ) , although in it's defense , crichton did write sphere before the abyss was released ( and is far superior to this rubbish . )
it's not all that bad though .
the plot is all right , there's a few jump scenes ( although nothing very scary ) and there's the occasionally interesting bit .
but overall , sphere is a big waste of some fine talent , a lot of money , and a potentially good movie .
not really worth seeing .
overall rating= review by david wilcock
| neg | Positive |
" battlefield earth " is the best comedy of the year .
it has to be .
the other prospect is just too horrifying to consider .
bad movie syndrome struck me again , so after witnessing how much " battlefield earth " has been proclaimed a train wreck in both critical and popular circles , i felt the masochistic urge to see the disaster first-hand .
is it as bad as advertised ?
oh yes , very much so .
the plot is incomprehensible .
the acting is atrocious .
the special effects are mediocre .
the action is dull .
the implausibilities are legion .
the dialogue is cringe-inducing .
the whole package is funny when it wants to be serious and irritating when it wants to be funny .
i don't even want to continue reviewing this movie ; i'd like to purge the atrocity from my mind as soon as possible , but you probably want to read my thrashing in all its sarcastic glory , so here it is :
the premise is basically a rip-off of " planet of the apes , " only minus the apes and philosophical discussion , and plus a race of evil aliens from the planet psychlo .
the year is 3000 , the psychlos have conquered earth , and the human population has been enslaved .
only a handful of humans escaped to radiation-rich areas to escape the aliens ; they live out their lives in fear .
one man , johnny goodboy ( i know , i know ) tyler ( barry pepper ) , ventures to the outworld and is captured by the psychlos .
there he confronts the psychlo head of security : a big , ugly , klingon-looking creature called terl ( john travolta ) .
pressed into slavery , johnny vows to lead a revolution and take the planet back .
meanwhile , terl is faced with his own problems : he has recently learned that he's stuck living on earth ( which he hates ) for the rest of his career because he pissed off his boss by sleeping with the big man's daughter .
he decides to give johnny knowledge of the psychlo language and technology ( this is where the plot gets ridiculous .
.
. )
so the " man-animal " can lead a mining expedition into places the psychlos can't go .
terl then plans to keep the mined gold for himself .
of course , his plan doesn't work .
so many things wrong with this movie -- where to begin ?
how about with travolta , whose hollywood clout brought about this , the cinematic version of scientology guru l . ron hubbard's sci-fi novel ?
early previews for " battlefield earth , " with constant shots of a makeup-laden travolta cackling like lex luthor , had me ( and several audience members ) remarking , " what the hell is travolta thinking ? "
the movie did nothing to stem such remarks .
all that ridiculous cackling he did in the trailers is in full force here : terl cackles after nearly every line , and so does every other psychlo .
of course , this makes every scene hilariously overwrought , no more so than when the script clumsily stumbles into political commentary .
the psychlos are probably supposed to be some kind of satire of corporate america , but ceos generally don't laugh maniacally after denying pay raises to their employees .
( " you were going to be promoted -- but now you're not !
fwahahahahahahahaha ! ! ! ! ! " )
it's no big surprise terl loses to the humans -- he's an idiot .
he breaks every kind of supervillain rule in the book .
he underestimates his enemies , assuming he'll win just because he's smarter .
( he uses the word " leverage " like some sort of scientologist mantra . )
not content to go the james bond villain route of explaining his plans to the hero , he hooks him up to a machine that gives him knowledge of all the psychlos' language and technology .
( why this machine is even around in the first place is beyond me . )
he then appears shocked that johnny points a gun at him .
no wonder this guy never got his promotion .
the plot inconsistencies are too numerous to mention .
why do the psychlos build an earth base in which both they and the human slaves must wear little breathing apparatuses to survive ?
how come the psychlos are wasting their time mining for gold when the doors of fort knox are wide open ?
how in the world did all those fighter jets survive sitting in a hangar for 1 , 000 years ?
and how do all these previously brain-dead cavemen learn to fly them so quickly ?
there's a whole lot more to scratch one's head about in " battlefield earth . "
bring a scorecard to track the plot holes .
director roger christian shoots " battlefield earth " in the most distracting way possible , tilting nearly every shot sideways for no discernible reason .
all the characters appear to be standing on the walls , and it's awfully difficult to watch a movie when you must tilt your head just to watch ordinary passages of dialogue .
the action sequences are atrociously edited , every one turned into an endless slow-motion parade that drains all potential excitement .
are these things really so hard to construct ?
my respect for supposed " lightweight " action directors has grown by leaps and bounds after witnessing in " battlefield earth " how badly an action sequence can be shot .
this movie is an absolute headache .
it's not just the shot selection and editing ; the movie , quite frankly , makes no sense .
for most of " battlefield earth's " running time , i just didn't know what was happening .
it didn't have anything to do with me finding the events stupid or illogical ( though they certainly are ) -- i really had no idea what the hell was going on .
when i pieced the plot together later , it didn't look any better .
here's how much of a disaster this is : " battlefield earth " is already the worst movie of the year , and it's going to take something really , really inept to top it .
the only thing we can take comfort in about the film is that no one will be suckered into joining the church of scientology because of it .
in fact , i'd think that hubbard's cult would want to distance themselves from this bomb as fast as possible .
that'll teach me to give into bad movie syndrome again .
| neg | Negative |
apparantly money talks .
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and uses quite a bit of obscenities doing so !
i've always considered myself pretty open about the gratuity a film can possess , whether in language , violence , sex , or what have you .
i find that this fact gives me a little more leverage to complain when a movie goes overboard , and money talks definitely does !
it's not so much that the movie swore nearly constantly ( and i mean constantly ! ) , but it swore so much that it seemed overly prominent and way too staged .
perhaps if one character were foul mouthed , but in this film , everybody swears nearly every other word .
money talks is about a black ticket scalper named franklin hatchett ( played less annoyingly than expected by chris tucker ) .
franklin is your typical con-man and ends up with more than one person out to get him .
when the plot finally gets underway , there's no less than three people ( or groups ) that want him , dead or alive .
the frenchman who's somewhat responsible for franklin's escape from a prisoner-packed bus , a hoodlum whom franklin owes seven grand , and the cops who wrongly suspect him of murder .
franklin's only hope : james russell ( charlie sheen ) , an investigative reporter for the local news who's out to prove himself a worthy journalist .
james offers to help clear franklin's name if franklin will just allow him an exclusive report to help channel 12 conquer sweeps week .
both of these elements are completely lost along the way however , and never do reappear .
as expected , the odd couple of franklin and james do wind up friends at the end , which is another wasted element seeing as how they show no signs of becoming friends at any point along the way .
there is just nothing original or intriguing about this film , and so many developments are either non-relevant , or just plain forgotten about .
money talks is a paint-by-numbers movie that lacks any real involvment with the audience .
frivilous dialogue , a predictable , flat storyline , and two-dimensional characters make money talks a reason to save your money .
| neg | Negative |
what is freedom ?
how does one determine who is free ?
in 1839 , those questions were more difficult to answer then they are now .
yet , the mistakes of our forefathers must be examined in order to rectify current situations .
that is , in essence , what steven spielberg's gripping drama " amistad " is about .
through its various dramas , spielberg presents a case about a group of africans , who , after being seized from their home , were forced onto a ship and sent to the united states aboard " la amistad " .
on their way there , the slaves , led by cinque ( djimon hounsou ) , rebelled , killing off part of the crew .
however , the ship was still directed towards the united states , where the africans were brought to trial under murder .
in the court , various factions claim ownership of the slaves , and therefore try to seize them away .
the united states government , led by president martin van buren ( nigel hawthorne ) , and secretary of state secretary forsyth ( david paymer ) , try to ship the africans to spain , where an 11 year old isabella ii ( anna paquin ) wants them back .
the two spaniards who own " la amistad " want the slaves for themselves .
the american ship that found the slaves also wants them .
in the midst of this are two abolitionists ( stellan skaarsgard and morgan freeman ) , who want the slaves to be free .
they enlist the help of lawyer matthew mcconaughey , who tries to free them .
through various legal proceedings , the case appears before the supreme court , where it is argued by ex-president john quincy adams ( anthony hopkins ) .
the film itself is a visual wonder .
spielberg favorite janusz kaminski sets the film in a dark , somber mood when appropriate , and a visual setting when appropriate as well .
at times , the film is very slow , and very methodical .
however , spielberg is not at his finest here , because the courtroom scenes have a tendency to lag .
the film is , in essence , a courtroom drama , one whose events are oversimplified .
the characterization is also weak , displaying weaknesses in building up characters such as the lawyer baldwin ( mcconaughey ) , and especially morgan freeman's abolitionist .
but spielberg's finest work in the film , the opening scene , a scene of cinque's family , and the brutal voyage of the slaves to america , is altogether stunning .
it is this emotional force that carries the film .
mcconaughey is superb as the lawyer defending the africans , hopkins is sensational as the old adams , freeman is outstanding when used ( spielberg vastly under uses his supreme talents ) , and the rest of the cast is stellar .
the movie , however , belongs to hounsou .
his emotional intensity is brilliant .
spielberg manages to make even the slowest scenes sparkle with focus on hounsou , and the film's extraordinary power is simply captivating .
the film is flawed , for most of the supporting characters are merely cardboard .
but that doesn't matter .
the story is a gripping one , and one of extreme importance .
kudos to spielberg for finding it , finding the right men for the job , and letting the audience listen to the words of cinque .
a good job all around .
| pos | Positive |
at one point in this movie there is a staging of an opera that goes completely wrong .
but one member of the crowd stands up and cheers , thinking the performance was planned , and applauding it for their efforts .
that's " dirty work " in a nutshell .
a very different kind of movie .
this is not a movie that i can easily review .
the critic in me analyzes the structure , plot , acting , characters .
.
. and
tells me this movie is terrible .
but the norm macdonald fan in me had me rolling on the floor laughing .
this movie plays more like an hbo sketch comedy than a movie .
it's a one note concept .
mitch and sam need $50000 in order to bribe a doctor to give their father a heart transplant before other more needy patients .
realizing they are very good at revenge plots , they open a revenge for hire business , eventually running afoul of a rich businessman played by christopher macdonald ( who after roles in " happy gilmore " and " veronica's closet " seems typcast in this role ) , who sends them to destroy a building that mitch learns is the home of his girlfriend's grandmother , thus leading them to plot against the rich businessman on the night of the grand opening of a new opera house .
first the critic in me .
the plot is the standard poor guy vs evil rich guy device , where the main character meets the girl of his dreams along the way .
here's the catch .
none of the characters are sympathetic .
they're all selfish jerks who don't care who they hurt in their attempts to do whatever they want .
the jokes are juvenile , crude , appealing to the worst elements in people .
there's jokes about prostitutes , the homeless , beastiality , anal sex .
there's even a subplot that's developed , it seems , only to make jokes about infidelity and incest .
and i loved watching it .
i was a huge fan of norm macdonald's sarcastic , to-the-point comedy on saturday night live , and this movie is an hour and a half of it .
norm macdonald takes a joke , strips it to the core , and tells it like it is with a dry wit .
like the scene were he and his friend are learning the ropes at a new construction job .
the foreman goes over the basics , which mitch and sam don't understand .
how do they get out of it ?
by admiting they lied on their resumes , and don't know a thing about construction !
and surprise , they get fired .
the characters are incredibly mean-spirited .
there's a father who's loud and obnoxious , a gambling addicted doctor played by chevy chase who tells sam of his father's condition by saying " if i were a gambling man i'd put a lot of money on death . "
the businessman cole who always has his dog spunky , and does who knows what with it .
and then there's mitch and sam , who , thinking they can get $50000 by destroying a building , ponder how their actions would ruin the lives of the residents .
" too bad we have to do it , " mitch says .
here's a movie where every joke that is executed as it is set up , where you see every punchline coming , where every spot profanity could be used and then is used .
at least the film is honest , and makes no mistake that it is anything more than idiotic .
but at least it isn't dull , and it isn't predictable .
and that's the way it should be .
it's sketch comedy , and if you're a fan of norm macdonald , you'll love it .
the jokes are crude , the characters are mean to the core , the attitude of the movie is that it just doesn't care .
if you don't like norm macdonald , or stupid movies , then you probably won't like this one .
the jokes are crude , the characters are mean to the core , the attitude of the movie is that it just doesn't care .
so before seeing this one , tune your mindset , and prepare for a slew of norm macdonald humor , gay animal sex , prison rape jokes , uncaring characters , and one last performance from chris farley .
the critic in me says ( * ) but i give it an 8 ( * * * ) .
i just couldn't stop laughing .
| neg | Negative |
imagine this .
you're given a sword and a shield and very basic , minimal training .
a man you don't know tells you that this will be the last day that you will live .
you are thrown into an arena with thousands of spectators wanting to see you die .
you frantically monitor several closed doors which , in seconds , will release vicious enemies prepared to destroy you .
you watch as the innocent friends you made in the last few days are murdered in cold blood .
if you are lucky enough to survive this chaos thrown at you , you know you're going to have to do it all over again tomorrow .
eventually know matter how strong or skilled you are , you're going to die .
this is the life of a gladiator .
you'll never have to be a gladiator and after seeing ridley scott's powerful gladiator , you'll be thankful for that .
with his new film , scott has returned cinema to the fascinating age of the ancient roman empire .
and like those preceding it , spartacus and ben hur , gladiator has nearly everything going for it - a strong lead actor , a wonderful supporting cast , eye-catching special effects , and a great script .
since the two aforementioned films came out before the prime target viewers of gladiator ( teenagers to thirty-year-old males ) were around , a whole new genre may just be reborn and revisited .
>from a weak beginning , the film starts off extremely gloomy and inauspicious .
rome's best general maximus ( russell crowe ) , who has helped the empire conquer nearly everywhere they have attempted , is currently ( in the year 180 a . d . that is ) waging a war against germania .
scott shoots the gory battle in an awkward style , similar to that of saving private ryan but much less effective .
it's blurry , in slow motion , and the sound is muted .
as soon as this artistic method began , it was hard to tell what was what and who was who .
it's a good thing scott stops this after the first twenty minutes or else gladiator would have been torture to watch .
instead , the general swears he will get out after this battle .
he wants to go back to his family and his crops , he wants a quiet life .
but , unexpectedly , he gets anything but that .
the dying emperor of rome , marcus aurelius ( richard harris ) , decides to have maximus appointed new emperor of rome once he dies .
he asks maximus to restore the republic by giving more power to the senators .
all of this does not go well for aurelius' son , commodus ( joaquin phoenix ) who was expecting his father to name him the new emperor .
jealous and upset , commodus kills his own father , names himself emperor , kills maximus' wife and son , and attempts to kill maximus .
but maximus is able to escape his own death and vows to kill commodus and fulfill marcus aurelius' wishes .
now a slave , the only way he can win his own freedom and complete his goal is to become a winning gladiator , who eventually are released for their success .
a story of betrayal and promises , gladiator is more than just a mindless action flick .
you actually care about the characters , sometimes even the evil villain commodus , who is just a young man as determined to make rome one way as maximus is determined to make it the other way .
phoenix plays his character brilliantly .
think of commodus as the percy wetmore ( of pant-wetter the green mile ) of the roman empire - a whiny , sleazy , " respect-me-because-my-father-was-a-good-man " brat who hates when he's not the center of attention .
every scene we see commodus , he's either crying or he looks like he has just been crying .
phoenix has definitely matured as an actor since to die for , and gladiator shows he's more than just river's little brother .
crowe is also excellent as the film's grisly-faced hero .
maximus is one of the few characters in recent cinema who actually has emotions .
this guy actually acts like a anyone in his situation would act , he's no invincible superhero who only blurts out one-liners , he ( believe it or not ) acts like a human being !
the rest of the cast , including richard harris , djimon hounsou , walter hill , derek jacobi , and connie nielsen are also first rate .
ridley scott , using outstanding special effects , has brilliantly recreated the roman coliseum , the loudness of the roman mob , and the city of rome in general .
the visuals are breathtaking and voluminous , like a cleopatra of the year 2000 .
the costuming is also wonderful from the detailed shields and armor to the exquisite dress of the upper-class politicians .
gladiator is another movie you have to see on the big screen to get the most out of the experience .
along with u-571 , action fans should have plenty to see in theaters this week and should expect much more excitement to come this summer of 2000 .
| pos | Positive |
us critic-type people are always shaking our heads and telling everyone that movies aren't thrill rides , but i think that " back to the future ii " is one of the few exceptions .
if the original film had the spirit of the 1950s , then this has the spirit of the 80s : full of fights ; chase scenes ; cliff hangers ; special effects ; some detective work ; and of course the vision of the high-tech future .
the film picks up exactly where the first film left off , with doc ( lloyd ) , marty ( fox ) , and jennifer ( elizabeth shue ) travelling 30 years into the future , because something bad is going to happen to marty and jennifer's kids .
doc tells marty he must take his son's place at an incident that will cause a chain reaction if marty mcfly jr . says yes to griff ( wilson - in one of four different roles ) .
whoever said history tends to repeat itself wasn't joking , especially when it comes to the movies .
essentially the same chase scene that marty endured in the 50s takes place again in the year 2015 , but it's not as authentically exciting this time because it is so obviously a parody of itself .
at the end of the situation marty has changed the course of history for the better , and it seems like everything's copasetic right ?
wrong .
since when do things go according to plan in the " back to the future " movies ?
there are so many minor conflicts and details that effect the plot and the direction of the story i won't even bother to list them all .
basically we get to see marty as an old man , his house , his family , etc . we also go back to an alternate 1985 , and then back again to 1955 , with everything happening so fast the film never stops to catch a breath .
the films' best aspect is the fact that it actually goes back to the first movie and shows a lot of the action that occurred from another angle .
it's difficult to convey the sense of wild and zany fun without describing every little detail .
the only thing sacrificed in this film is the suspense .
instead of a grand finale , we get lots of little victories .
by the end everything is back to normal , but something happens that leads to yet another sequel , but it doesn't seem gratuitous .
" back to the future part ii " is a really great adventure movie .
it certainly has more originality than other films but it lacks a certain charm that was dominate throughout its predecessor .
| pos | Negative |
edward burns tackles his third picture with no looking back , and like his previous two , it is a working-class relationship picture .
however , unlike his previous work , the film dwells on a more personal story , and with a female protagonist .
and in no looking back , he stumbles , making a slow , boring film without the spark that enlivened his previous work .
claudia ( lauren holly ) is a small town waitress who is feeling stifled by her life .
she's at a turning point in her life , and feels as if she's going nowhere .
her boyfriend , michael ( jon bon jovi ) , is broke and in a dead end job .
if she were to marry him , she'd never get a chance to escape this town .
enter charlie ( edward burns ) , claudia's old flame .
he skipped town several years before , without any explanations . . . even
for claudia .
he has come back to town to see her , and suddenly she is torn .
should she stay with stable michael , and never escape her hometown . . . or
should she ignore her instincts and fall for charlie again .
part of the answer lies in the character of her mother ( blythe danner ) , who fell for the wrong man . . . and has spent her life pining for claudia's father to return .
now it seems that claudia is about to make the same mistakes .
at only a little past ninety minutes , no looking back is rather short for its genre .
unfortunately , it seems much much longer .
the storyline is simple and uninspired , and there's a lack of energy to the whole proceedings , which makes the entire drama rather tedious .
edward burns makes a misstep by casting himself in the crucial role as the egomaniacal old flame .
there's no one to restrain his ego , which reigns unchecked .
he walks into the room and lauren holly swoons . . . yeah ,
right .
lauren holly does what she can with her central character .
but we never understand why her character makes such pathetically bad decisions . . . and
we never really care .
bon jovi is the only sympathetic character in the whole movie .
his acting talents are much greater than they might seem , but he is given a mostly bland and ineffective role to work with .
there's not much to recommend in no looking back .
it's not that the film is bad . . . it's
simply boring .
there's no zest in any aspect of the film , and no reason to spend ninety minutes watching it .
| neg | Negative |
in my review of there's something about mary , i said something to the effect of " laughter isn't everything . "
i now need to make a brief addendum to my postulate : laughter isn't everything , unless i'm watching a jim abrahams film .
see , spoofs are easy with me .
i love movies , and i love movies that make fun of movies that i love .
sometimes i'm the only one in the theater laughing .
sometimes i laugh so hard that i embarass myself because my laugh is so high-pitched in comparison to my speaking voice ( it cuts right through everyone else's laughter ) .
sometimes i laugh so much that my cheekbones are sore by the end of the film .
abraham's latest film , mafia ! , induced this kind of hysteria upon me .
it's gotten some mediocre reviews , but , hey , i'm the guy who laughs at everything .
there may be a lot of jokes that flop in this film , but there are far more that work , and i laughed so frequently that the failed jokes usually occurred as i was recovering from the previous bout of giddy madness .
i enjoy films like this because not one second of it is serious or thought-provoking .
most lighweight films that pose as comedies try to do other things , like develop characters , shape stories , and other such nonsense .
mafia !
has no pretentions about characters or story , and it exists for no other reason than to make people laugh .
the film begins on the perfect high note , with a mockery of the opening of casino .
our hero ( jay mohr ) is seen walking from a casino and getting into his car , which subsequently explodes and sends him flying through the air against a backdrop of flowing fire .
to describe the story of mafia !
is absurd and pointless , but i will mention that it basically follows the framework of the godfather films , with a lot of casino references inserted throughout .
along the way , the parodies seem arbitrary , and rarely victimize mob films : pictures like the english patient , forrest gump , and jaws undergo severe and hilarious bashing .
movies like this rely on just a few things , but the most important element is direction .
abrahams has been down this path many times before ( hot shots ! , top secret ! , airplane ! , and any other film with an exclamation point in the title ) , and so i hold most of the success of mafia !
to his experience .
he takes just the right attitude in each scene , and manages to wring at least a bit laughter out of even the most oddly placed references ( one inexplicable moment seems like it wants to make fun of titanic , but it never develops ) .
the actors are all energetic , which helps a lot with the tone of the film .
mohr ( suicide kings , paulie ) , who is quickly becoming one of my favorite actors , is so good here .
he looks like he's having so much fun that he's containing his laughter in every scene ( watch his face in the sequence by the swimming pool ) .
he's probably the only performer in the cast who manages to urge laughter without the help of the material .
lloyd bridges does a decent imitation of brando's godfather , while pamela gidley is dead-on in a full-blown mockery of sharon stone .
the hard thing about writing reviews for comedies is that i'm supposed to give examples of things and be specific .
unfortunately , i was so constantly blindsided by laughter during mafia !
that i can't remember a lot of what made me laugh .
but that's a good sign : mafia !
is so funny that i wasn't even given time to apply any of the scenes to memory .
i laughed so hard that it shut off my brain .
i know that doesn't sound particularly complimentary , but when watching a dumb comedy like this , the first thing i want to do is shut off my brain .
finally , a film that does this for me .
| pos | Positive |
not since oliver stone's natural born killers has there been a movie this incendiary , and not since david cronenberg has a so-called mainstream director been this willing to repeatedly tiptoe the fine line between pointed social commentary and outright social irresponsibility .
while fincher's films have never suffered from a lack of shock value ( his major character killings in both alien 3 and seven are fine examples ) , fight club marks the distillation of his pitch-black comedic sensibility ( see 1997's the game ) into something like a definitive statement .
jack ( norton , acting as both narrator and protagonist ) is your typical cubicle clone , whose disillusionment is amplified by a seemingly incurable insomnia .
on the offhand advice of a doctor , he sits in on group-therapy sessions for everything from blood parasites to testicular cancer .
here he meets bob ( marvin lee aday , aka meat loaf ) , a cancer-emasculated eunuch with profound gynecomastia .
strangely , the release he finds while sobbing on bob's breasts allows him to sleep at night , at least until a fellow group-therapy " tourist " named marla singer ( carter ) comes along to ruin things for him , forcing a grudging compromise that recalls monty python in its dark hilarity .
later , he meets tyler durden ( pitt ) , a soap salesman with a decidedly subversive outlook on life .
one night , after his ikea- furnished condo explodes ( don't ask-- you'll just have to see the movie , awright ? ) , he is goaded by tyler into a fight , and damned if it doesn't feel good .
it is pure , raw existence , a brief moment of clarity and purpose that makes his dreary workaday life pale in comparison .
he moves into tyler's squalid abandoned mansion , and they form the titular organization , an underground therapy group where men bond with bare-knuckle savagery and very few rules , the first two of which are " don't talk about fight club . "
armed with charisma and an attractive anti-corporate philosophy , tyler assumes leadership of the burgeoning membership of white-collar slaves and dead-end mcemployees .
resentment creeps into jack's heart , made worse by the fact that tyler is also regularly and noisily boffing the hated marla .
funded by a frivolous lawsuit , tyler begins molding his devotees into an army dedicated to mischief and mayhem .
their initially juvenile pranks ( like pissing in food and putting spike belts on roads ) quickly evolve into something more like sedition , and jack fears that things have gone sour .
it is after this point , when you are plenty uncomfortable and wondering just how far fincher will go to say something original , that the film uncorks a disappointing plot twist .
it is so contrived-- and so conventional compared to what precedes it-- that everything which follows ( including the ending ) becomes far less interesting .
it's a major ( though not fatal ) flaw , and for a director as notoriously unpredictable as fincher , it feels like a cop-out .
fight club is going to be misconstrued by a great many people .
in the early going , it has a downright dangerous feel ; it seems to be saying that violence and civil disobedience are good for the soul , and this is undoubtedly the message that a few moronic punks are going to take from it .
i'll be mightily surprised if imitation fight clubs don't spring up here and there , and i'll be even more amazed if fincher isn't vilified for it by the same humorless witch-hunters that are currently after oliver stone .
they needn't bother , because fight club is less a message movie than fincher's elaborate attempt at a joke .
tyler durden , for all his dionysian allure , is really nothing more than the logical ( and far less hypocritical ) extrapolation of all those self-help gurus who constantly show up on oprah to preach their me-first gospel of self-actualization .
in this context , the joke works , but like the latest columbine joke , some people will get it and enjoy a good laugh , and others won't .
hopefully , though , their silly moral outrage won't spoil the joke for the rest of us .
| pos | Positive |
while screen adaptations of john irving's novels have been disappointingly uneven , the films have all shared one particular strength : key casting .
who can forget john lithgow as roberta muldoon , the transsexual quarterback of " the world according to garp , " or nastassja kinski as susie the bear in " the hotel new hampshire " ?
a lot of good casting decisions have gone into the making of " the cider house rules , " an adaptation of irving's poetic 1994 novel about a restless young man called homer wells .
among those sound judgments was the decision to have the splendid tobey maguire assume the pivotal role ; the decision to cast michael caine as his mentor and father figure , dr . wilbur larch , the ether-addicted head obstetrician of the st . cloud's orphanage , maine ; and the decision to offer jane alexander and kathy baker supporting roles as his head nurses .
then there are the brethren who populate the apple orchard where homer wells finds himself shortly after leaving st . cloud's , including delroy lindo , oscar ? -worthy as the foreman of the migrant work detail that drifts up and down the coast as the seasons take them .
there's kate nelligan as the matriarch of the cider house , and charlize theron as candy , the lovely , lonely wife of a wwii bomber pilot ( paul rudd ) sent away on a mission overseas leaving candy to set lobster traps with homer wells , a man who's never seen the ocean before let alone a lobster .
am i forgetting anyone ?
yes .
kieran culkin and paz de la huerta as dissolute orphanage residents who make you sit up and take notice every time they're on the screen .
but with " the cider house rules , " the good people decisions don't end with the cast .
irving has written his own screenplay in order to get it right this time ( last year's " simon birch , " loosely based on his " a prayer for owen meaney , " was a big-screen example of irving handled sub-standardly ) ; the author appears fleetingly as a stationmaster here .
rachel portman , a composer of such sweet and lyrical tenderness , provides a score that's absolutely right for the project--sweet , lyrical , and tender .
there's impressive new england photography by oliver stapleton too .
last but by no means least is " my life as a dog " director lasse hallstr ? m , who shows enormous skill in pulling this collective together and helping bring irving's marvelously touching story to life .
for the many beloved who pass away in " the cider house rules , " it's an extraordinarily life-affirming story .
and now , thanks to these talented individuals , it's an extraordinarily life-affirming film .
| pos | Positive |
bob the happy bastard's quickie review :
the odd couple ii
grumpy old men , it ain't .
hell , my fellow americans , it ain't .
walter matthau and jack lemmon team up again for an even more worn out vehicle than any of their films over the past few years .
odd couple ii feels terribly generic , where in the first movie , made thirty one years ago , feels like a wonderful tale .
that's like repackaging campbell's soup in a generic food can , really .
how writer neil simon could've made such a horrible mistake in screen writing is beyond me .
throughout the movie , i really didn't laugh once .
honestly .
i mean , there were dumb situations , yeah , like the cropduster who let these old geezers have it without any notice , but they just really didn't seem funny to me .
and that car rolling off the cliff ?
the only way i would've seen humor in that is if they were still in it .
and the ending gets all super-mushy , too .
in the final twenty minutes or so , lemmon meets a girl he thinks is the one , then loses her ; matthau talks to his son ( a wasted jonathan silverman ) about his amrriage to lemmon's daughter ; and , of course , lemmon and matthau have another roomie situation on their hands .
ooh , i really gave a lot away there , i'm sure .
consider it a hospitable gester , you won't waste your time renting this muck .
| neg | Negative |
a life less ordinary ( r ) while the extremely peculiar a life less ordinary does live up to its title , a more appropriate moniker would be a movie more misguided , for this confused , confusing attempt at romantic comedy is a most disarming disaster from the talented trainspotting team of director danny boyle , producer andrew macdonald , and screenwriter john hodge .
at the core of this strange film is a fairly basic--and , yes , ordinary--premise .
after robert ( boyle regular ewan mcgregor ) , an aspiring writer of trashy novels , is fired from his janitorial job at the naville corporation , he kidnaps naville's ( ian holm ) spoiled daughter celine ( cameron diaz ) and holds her for ransom .
the joke here is that celine is a willing victim--her father threatened to cut her off financially , so she wants revenge--and that she soon becomes not only an accomplice but the brains behind the scheme , teaching the inept robert a thing or two about kidnapping . . .
and , ultimately ( didn't we see this one coming ? ) ,
love .
so far , so mediocre .
but mediocre is better than dreadful , which this film is , thanks in no small part to the hodge's contextual frame for the romance .
it turns out that god is displeased with the divorce and romantic breakup rate on earth , so the chief of heaven's police , gabriel ( dan hedaya ) dispatches two angels , o'reilly ( holly hunter ) and jackson ( delroy lindo ) , to earth to hook up celine and robert--or lose their angel status .
this conceit might have worked if the angel dimension played an integral role in the entire picture .
but it could have easily been cut without any clear loss to the film ; as it stands , it is simply a waste of time that distracts from the romance at hand .
not that there is much of a romance to begin with .
try as diaz and mcgregor may , celine and robert are too one-note to become very endearing characters .
celine is rich bitch ; robert is a dullard .
as such , it is quite hard for the audience to really connect with these two--then again , they never seem to really connect with each other .
when celine and robert start to overtly act on their " feelings , " it comes off more like something scripted than anything natural .
but i am not exactly sure if boyle and company's point was romance ; honestly , i am not exactly sure what they were trying to accomplish .
boyle juices up the visuals with his characteristic razzmatazz , but it remains just that--energy , not energy in service of a story or even acting .
the cast seems lost , especially hunter , whose performance is so adrift as to be baffling .
and then there are the many eccentricities splattered onto the film : some violent confrontations involving the angels , who are not exactly angelic--in fact , they end up staging their own ransom scheme ; some mystical hokum in the climax ; and a cutesy claymation epilogue .
watching much of a life less ordinary is like being trapped in indie hipster hell , stockpiling quirks in the name of cool .
instead , the film just gives quirky a bad name .
my best guess as to what the filmmakers wanted to accomplish is an atmosphere of warped womantic ( yes , misspelling intended ) whimsy , which comes through in only one scene : an extended musical number where celine and robert sing " beyond the sea " at a karaoke bar .
after a verse or two , the couple are magically dolled up in snazzy outfits and hairdos , and engage in a spirited dance routine on the counter .
the scene works not only because of its relative simplicity but also because it does not try too hard , just relying on the innate charm of the leads , allowing them to build a romantic rapport .
alas , not nearly enough is built , for this moment comes to an abrupt end .
i applaud any attempt to bring something fresh and unique to movie houses , but sometimes even cleverness can reach overkill .
a life less ordinary certainly delivers something " different , " but by the time the film was over , i was clamoring for a life more ordinary .
" i can accept failure .
everyone fails at something .
but i can't accept not trying .
it doesn't matter if you win as long as you give everything in your heart . "
--michael jordan
| neg | Positive |
robocop is an intelligent science fiction thriller and social satire , one with class and style .
the film , set in old detroit in the year 1991 , stars peter weller as murphy , a lieutenant on the city's police force .
1991's detroit suffers from rampant crime and a police department run by a private contractor ( security concepts inc . ) whose employees ( the cops ) are threatening to strike .
to make matters worse , a savage group of cop-killers has been terrorizing the city .
on murphy's first day of duty , after his transfer from another precinct , these cop-killers brutally murder him by shooting off his limbs one by one .
( orion pictures had to edit this extremely graphic scene in order to get an r rating from the m . p . a . a . )
after the emergency room staff at the hospital cannot save murphy and declare him clinically dead , s . c . i .
recruits his remains for their new " robocop " program .
using the remains of murphy's body as a foundation , their scientists build a cyborg , made of both flesh and metal .
the cyborg ( robocop ) is half human ( murphy ) and half robot ; the s . c . i .
engineers have erased murphy's memory and replaced it with a computer program ( or so they think ) .
with his lightning quick reflexes , immense strength , and impenetrable armor , s . c . i .
envisions robocop as an indestructible super-cop : the solution to detroit's problems .
the remainder of the plot follows robocop's crime-foiling and vengeance on his murderers .
as a science fiction action-thriller , robocop is extremely effective .
dutch director paul verhoeven combines gritty action with suspense , shocking gore , and spectacular special effects .
several sequences in the film , such as the one in which robocop employs his extremely precise aim to stop a rapist , are destined to become cult-classics .
because robocop is so visually and emotionally rousing , it demands to be seen on a large screen with an audience--in other words , in a movie theater .
although the special effects and action are exciting , they do not by themselves set robocop apart from other films in the genre .
rather , robocop stands out for its accurate and biting satire of american society .
the movie makes a mockery of the star wars defense initiative , terrorism , board games , and television news broadcasts with air-headed anchors .
these news broadcasts , which are exceptionally clever , recur periodically throughout the movie and help to provide comic relief from the intense action and gore .
the satire in robocop , however , is almost as frightening in its own way as the suspense and blood .
1990's america , as portrayed in the film , may seem far fetched but is in actuality ( i think ) only a slight exaggeration of the current state of american society .
the humorous satire in robocop is simultaneously credible and absurd .
verhoeven adroitly balances the satirical comedy with the gory action to create an entertaining and enlightening piece of science fiction/social commentary .
unfortunately , robocop possesses several flaws which prevent it from qualifying as a classic within the genre .
the movie lacks the lasting impact of such films as the road warrior , the terminator , and aliens .
robocop's main problem , aside from its dumb title , is that it does not sufficiently develop murphy's character .
we never learn the degree to which murphy ( as robocop ) is human and the degree to which he is a robot .
does murphy have any human spirit or free will left , or is he merely a computer following a program ?
the script halfheartedly raises these issues but then abandons them in its climactic flurry of gory action .
moreover , it almost completely ignores the question ( and tragedy ) of denying a man his right to die in favor of turning him into a machine .
robocop also contains several bothersome loose-ends .
as you watch robocop , you experience deja vu ; you feel as if you have seen the film before .
in many respects , robocop is reminiscent of several other films , including the terminator , return of the jedi , and even death wish .
however , to its credit , robocop easily has enough originality and unique personality to avoid becoming a cheap rip-off .
| pos | Negative |
some movies ask you to leave your brain at the door , some movies ask you to believe in the impossible to really have a good time .
playing god asks just one simple , eensy , teensy thing so it can fully entertain you , it's accomplished in just four easy to follow steps : crack open your skull , scoop out your brain , squish it under your foot several times and reverse steps two and one .
congratulations , you now have all the necessary requirements to fully enjoy a whole lot of nothing .
some movies fail at the box office but you manage to see why the producers thought it could have been a good movie , others are simply good ideas that are badly executed .
then there's playing god , which enters the esteemed category of movies which seem to have grown from the union of a drunk director , actors satisfied in the knowledge that this horrible flick will have no lasting impact on their careers and a bunch of rip-offs ( or homages as they like to call it ) from other , better movies that end up looking like an unflushed toilet .
harsh ? maybe .
justified ?
hell yes !
this is a movie that is not just satisfied in ripping off other movies but feels the need to remind us of that fact every ten minutes .
for example , a gunman bursts into a garden with the two guns in his hands firing away .
this does look moderately kool , but the camera lingers on the actor for so long you can almost hear the director yelling : " oooh , look look !
john woo !
two guns blazing !
slooooow motion ! "
and if that wasn't enough , you can also hear the script grunting under the effort it must take to try and make every single line of dialogue sound like something deep and meaningful like in a tarantino movie .
poor timothy hutton gets to deliver most of the corny lines , you have to admire the effort he puts into it , this guy deserves better .
unlike most movies this one does not suffer from " stupid bad guy " syndrome , just to make things a little different this time we get stupid heroes .
example : duchovny manages to distract a bad guy by making him go into the bathroom to get some bandages .
now the bad guy is , like , stoned , man , so he leaves his shotgun next to our hero .
( term used as loosely as possible )
survival instincts and a good dose of common sense seems to suggest grabbing the shotgun , which our hero does , but only after contemplating it for about thirty seconds .
even when he does grab it he seems unsure how to hold it , going so far as to actually wonder if he should place a finger near the trigger .
mind you , i've never fired a shotgun in my life but believe you me that the bad guy would be missing most of his vital organs , be he stoned or not .
some will argue that our hero does not have a killer instinct , the hell with that !
two fbi guys have just been shot in front me , along with one bad guy and the other looks like he might go ballistic at any second .
solution ?
boom !
i'll take the time to feel sorry about it later thank you very much .
another prime example of the idiot hero syndrome :
our boy duchovny needs to reach his girl before something bad happens to her .
he knows the head bad guy has her on the tenth floor of a building and that he might be running into a room full of people with itchy trigger fingers .
he still has his shotgun , bring it along you say ?
no thanks , i'll just ditch it in the back of my car .
and the real kicker is this : when he reaches the room and people start shooting at him he has the nerve to look surprised !
while we are on the subject of getting shot , why in hades were those fbi guys sitting with their backs to the door ?
i've got no formal training but even i know you never sit with your back to the door .
ask mr . wild bill , the first and only time he did not sit with his back to a wall cost him his life .
this is the major problem with this movie , any mook could have thought of a hundred ways to make it better .
is it so much to ask that hollywood actually put a little common sense into their characters ?
for instance :
our heroes hide at duchovny's summer home , now the bad guys could come knocking at any moment .
ok , this time our hero does get himself a gun and has it at his side most of the time .
but see , our hero is a drug addict and guess what ?
he chooses now to go clean and suffer through dt .
oh sure , he'll be really impressive when the bad guys come calling .
going clean is really honorable of him , but i would have waited until i did not need to be conscious or being able to fire a gun .
for an enjoyable performance by timothy hutton , plot holes the size of godzilla , getting our intelligence insulted and several " oh come on ! "
moments .
| neg | Negative |
" jack frost , " is one of those dumb , corny concoctions that attempts to be a heartwarming family film , but is too muddled in its own cliches and predictability to be the least bit touching .
this does not come as a surprise , since the studio that made it is warner brothers , who is on a current streak of one bad film after the other .
jack frost ( michael keaton ) is a struggling middle-aged rock musician who loves his wife , gabby ( kelly preston ) , and 11-year-old son , charlie ( joseph cross ) , but doesn't spend nearly enough time with them .
when he receives a call from a music label that wants to hear him play , he has to cancel his planned family outing up in the mountains for christmas .
halfway there , jack has second thoughts , but on his way back home , is in a car accident and dies .
switch forward a year , christmas is approaching once again , and charlie and gabby are still having a difficult time coming to terms with jack's death .
when charlie begins to play the harmonica his father gave him the night before he died , the snowman outside the house is taken over by jack's spirit .
jack wants to spend some time with his son before the upcoming warm front melts him , but charlie desperately tries to prevent his melting demise .
" frosty the snowman , " is a classic cartoon , and the idea of a snowman that is alive works splendidly when animated , but as a live-action film , it doesn't work at all .
after a somewhat promising prologue in which the frost family is established , " jack frost , " quickly goes downhill , especially once the snowman comes into play .
since jack has been deceased for a whole year , you would think there would be many questions to ask him , such as , " what happens after you die ? "
or , " how does it feel to be a snowman ? "
but instead , the film focuses on a snowball fight subplot and an inevitably oversentimental climax that could be telegraphed before i even sat down to watch the movie .
the performances are respectable enough , but no one deserves to be punished by appearing in a silly film like this .
michael keaton at least got off easy , since he disappears after the first twenty minutes , but what exactly does he think he is doing with his career here ?
i have always liked kelly preston .
she is clearly a talented , charismatic actress , but has never been given a good role in her life , usually having to settle for a one-dimensional supporting character , as in , 1997's , " nothing to lose , " and , " addicted to love . "
joseph cross was probably the highlight in the cast , since he believably portrayed a boy suffering the loss of a parent .
in one of the only subplots that actually works , due to its wittiness , henry rollins is highly amusing as a hockey coach who becomes terrified and paranoid after seeing the live snowman .
this brief hint of cleverness is pushed to the side , however , by the tried-and-true main plot at hand , which is the sappy story of a father and son .
since i knew what was going to happen by the time the conclusion came around , i had no choice but to sit there and listen to painfully insipid , cringe-inducing lines of dialogue .
some of my favorites was an interaction between the son and father : " you da man , " says charlie .
" no , i da snowman , " replies jack .
or how about this little zinger , coming from a school bully that miraculously becomes friendly towards charlie and tries to help him out : " snowdad is better than no dad . "
do people really get paid in hollywood for writing pieces of trash like this ?
the snowman , created by john henson's creature shop , is more believable than the snowman from last year's unintentionally hilarious direct-to-video horror flick , also called , " jack frost , " but it still was difficult to tell if it was a person in a suit or computer effects .
either way , it was an awful lot of work to go through , just to come up with a final product as featherbrained as this project .
as a seasonal holiday picture , " jack frost , " is pretty much a clunker .
a better christmas film from this year is , " i'll be home for christmas . "
better yet , my suggestion would be to stay home and watch a quality film , such as , " it's a wonderful life , " " a christmas story , " or , " prancer . "
" jack frost , " is an earnest , but severely misguided film , and children , as well as adults , deserve better .
i doubt they would want to see a movie about the death of a parent , anyway .
| neg | Negative |
the farrelly brothers' third film , after dumb and dumber ( 7 . 5/10 ) and kingpin ( 8/10 ) , brings together the real-life couple of cameron diaz and matt dillon , some nasty humour , a cute dog , and a mix of love , fate and romance .
plot : high-school nerd ted gets lucky when the cutest girl in his class asks him to the prom .
unfortunately for ted , he accidentally gets a part of his male anatomy ( ouch ! )
caught in his zipper , and misses the big night .
thirteen years later , ted still can't get mary out of his mind , and hires a private detective ( dillon ) to find her .
once found , it turns out that mary has more than one suitor , and that's when the real fun begins .
critique : likeable comedy with a few extremely funny scenes , some funny looking people , and a plot that won't ever put you to sleep .
having said that , i must admit that i did like the farrellys' two previous films more than this one , but that is saying a lot , since i really did love those earlier pics .
this one is also quite funny , but it didn't really blow me away like the others .
then again , maybe my expectations were too high .
then again , maybe i should shut up , and write a little more about the film , and less about my supposed subconscious reasons for liking/disliking the film .
continuing where their other pictures left off , the farrellys' create a cutesy world of people with strange and endearing qualities , and a simple plot by which to tie them all together .
this one also includes plenty of toilet humour , but also some borderline fun-making of the disabled and mentally-challenged .
i must admit that i really wasn't sure whether to laugh at some points or not .
not a good place to be .
having said that , the scenes that did tear through the audience , and yours truly , were extremely hilarious , and went on for several minutes after the punchline .
the laughter practically killed out the next scene for one of the best ones in the movie ( something to do with hair gel ) .
on the negative end , i did not like the musical interludes of jonathan richman that ran through the entire picture .
i found them quite useless , unfunny and distracting .
also , i found that a lot of the funnier scenes had already been shown in the film's trailer .
and of course , i never quite buy the fact that these beautiful , intelligent , single women still can't seem to find the " right guy " ( see kiss the girls ( 7/10 ) .
i did really like all of the actors in the film , especially ben stiller , who appears to be solidifying his mark as a great comical actor with this picture and one of my favourites from 1996 , flirting with disaster ( 8/10 ) .
i also liked matt dillon with his big teeth , and lee evans with his superb faux-sympathy british accent .
funny stuff .
also , make sure that you stay for the credits , because there is an entire montage of outtakes from the film that plays under a lip-synched version of " build me up buttercup " , which is really cool .
overall , a cute comedy with a decent premise , and a few particularly hilarious scenes .
little known facts : the farrellys big break came when they somehow got a copy of their script " dust to dust " into the hands of eddie murphy via ? murphy's neighbour .
they only found out about murphy's interest , when they saw eddie mention the script on the david letterman show one night .
matt dillon is a high school dropout .
in between acting gigs , dillon has branched out into the restaurant business .
close to home in his native new york , he co-owns both a bar called the whiskey and a swanky uptown eatery called the falls .
cameron diaz stands 5 " 9 , started working as a model at the early age of 16 , and loves cats .
ben stiller's father is jerry stiller .
he played george costanza's ( jason alexander ) father on tv's " seinfeld " .
peter farrelly has written a novel entitled " outside providence " which is currently being filmed starring alec baldwin .
rob moran , who plays the cop in this film , also played the millionaire bowler in kingpin , and the bartender in dumb and dumber .
he is old friends with the farrelly brothers from college , and is currently married to entertainment tonight anchor/correspondant julie moran .
harland williams , who plays the nutty hitchhiker in this film , also played a state trooper in the farrelly's earlier dumb and dumber , and was the star of the unfortunate rocket man .
| pos | Positive |
talk about beating a dead horse !
when home alone was released in 1990 , it was a breath of fresh air , and the final box office tally indicated how much audiences appreciated a genuinely-funny family film .
the unexpectedly high gross guaranteed a sequel , so , two years later , we were subjected to home alone 2 , which might as well have been called clone alone for all of the originality it exhibited .
for john hughes , two home alone movies weren't enough ? he began recycling the same kinds of villains and situations in almost every movie he was involved with , including a pathetic box office bomb called baby's day out , last year's live-action 101 dalmatians , and this year's flubber .
now , inexplicably , hughes has exhumed not only these worn-out plot elements , but the " home alone " name as well .
the result ? 1997's worst sequel ( edging out speed 2 and batman and robin ) , home alone 3 .
by changing the characters , hughes ( who wrote and co-produced the film ) , along with his co-conspirator , director raja gosnell , has attempted to inject new life into a series that is way past the point of cardiac arrest .
the new kid , alex pruitt , is played by alex d . linz ( one fine day ) , and the only thing he has going for him is terminal cuteness .
he's not half as interesting as macaulay culkin once was .
the villains , pale copies of joe pesci and daniel stern , are even less engaging than the pair of idiots in flubber .
in home alone 3 , there are four of them ( olek krupa , david thornton , lenny von dohlen , and rya kihlstedt ) , but all that means is an opportunity for twice as many pratfalls .
this time , the kid isn't left home alone because his parents have gone on a trip .
instead , he has developed a bad case of chicken pox , so he can't go to school .
his dad ( kevin kilner ) is away on business and his mom ( haviland morris ) has to run errands , so , for the most part , he's all by himself during the day .
through a series of coincidences too irritating to relate , a top secret u . s . air force integrated circuit comes into his possession .
it's wanted by a gang of four international crooks who intend to break into alex's home to retrieve it .
the eight- year old , who is wise beyond his years , booby traps the house with all sorts of rube goldberg-type devices designed to humiliate and incapacitate the villains .
the movie's climax takes place during a raging snowstorm ? only none of the falling flakes looks remotely believable .
previously , the most counterfeit-looking snow effects i can remember were in star trek iii .
these are far worse .
in fact , the production values are so shoddy that there are some scenes in the midst of this near-blizzard when a shining sun can be seen .
if it's a wonderful life could generate real- looking snow back in the 1940s , why can't home alone 3 , which has a significantly larger budget and '90s technology at its disposal ?
there has been an ongoing debate regarding the appropriateness of live-action cartoon violence for young children .
home alone 3 will add fuel to the fire .
it's one thing to see wyle e . coyote flattened by a 10 ton acme weight , but quite another to watch a running lawn mower fall on lenny von dohlen .
adults and even older children will recognize that this is obviously fake and intended to be humorous , but what about five and six-year olds ?
the level of violence in home alone 3 is extreme ? many of alex's schemes are nasty enough to kill .
but , because this is a " family film , " no one dies , despite being electrocuted , falling thirty feet , and getting smacked on the head by a barbell .
not only is home alone 3 unnecessary , but it's offensive .
it's an exercise in tediousness , and there isn't a genuine laugh to be found from the beginning to the end ( unless , by some strange quirk of fate , you have missed every 1990s movie associated with john hughes , and thus haven't seen this stuff before ) .
i can't imagine anyone with a reasonable attention span being more than momentarily distracted by this pointless adventure .
maybe that's why the only ones laughing at the screening i attended were still in their thumb-sucking years .
| neg | Negative |
synopsis : as a response to accusations of sexual prejudice in the armed forces , a female naval intelligence officer is chosen to be a test case .
if she can survive the demanding s . e . a . l .
training , she will open the way for other women to be permitted to follow in her footsteps .
throw in a lot of political machinations , sabotage , brutality , water and sand and you have an entertaining movie .
review : the title of this movie turned me off at first .
i mean 'gi jane ? ' ? ? ? ? ?
the other titles which were considered were more promising - in pursuit of honor or a matter of honor would have been acceptable although navy cross or undisclosed are a little meaningless as far as i'm concerned .
i went into this movie not liking the title and being one of those people who thinks that demi moore is absolutely ghastly as an actor .
to my surprise i really enjoyed the movie .
moore as lieutenant jordan o'neil is much more likeable than her washed out excuse for a gusty woman in a few good men .
the storyline is simple .
anne bancroft playing senator lillian dehaven is a ruthless , machiavellian politician with an agenda to push .
using feminism to achieve political mileage , she forces the military powers that be to backdown and permit a test case to enter the highly intensive navy s . e . a . l .
training .
jordan is selected due to the fact that she has it all - looks , brains and strength .
the training is gruelling and the indignity almost painful to watch .
nonetheless , it's one of those movies that makes me want to cheer out and encourage the hapless hero/heroine along in his/her endeavours .
sure , there are the stereotypical elements - inhuman treatment , sexual innuendo , resentful peers , pained boyfriend and sexist commanding officer .
stepping away from the stereotypes though , viggo mortensen as master chief john urgayle tries to get away from being nothing more than a brutal screamer .
his character exercises a little more intellectual rigour than you would normally expect from such a character .
jordan's boyfriend royce is also in the military .
although they both started at the same time , due to the fact that he has seen active service , he has advanced through the ranks much more quickly than she has .
royce ( what is his surname ?
do we care ? )
almost resents jordan's attempts to advance herself , although he quickly settles down to being doe-eyed and supportive .
his character seems to have been thrown in so that we know that you don't have to be a lesbian to want to be in the military .
in parts , this is a very silly movie , with gratuitous lines and scenes thrown in for effect which are so blatantly obvious or contrived that it's hard not to cringe .
i still liked it though .
weaknesses in the script aside , this is a film which captures a heroic and reckless mood .
as we watch jordan's battle , it's increasingly clear that it is a personal battle .
this is an individual's fight for self-advancement .
we don't have to have our teeth set on edge by didactic preachings , we don't have to feel uncomfortable because we're having ideology thrust down our throats .
it's enough that we can sit back and hope that this one person gets what she wants and we can admire her tenacity and determination without coming out and saying whether we believe women should go into combat or not .
| pos | Positive |
carry on matron is the last great carry-on film in my opinion .
made in 1972 , it still features most of the regulars of this genre .
sid james plays the head of a gang of crooks intent on stealing contraceptive pills from the local maternity hospital and selling them off to make a profit , kenneth williams is sir bernard cutting , head of the hospital but also a hypochondriac , hattie jacques re-takes her role as matron , and charles hawtrey is the psychiatrist dr . goode .
the jokes come in fast and so do the laughs , with humorous antics between the matron and sir bernard .
this time , williams is after matron ( jacques ) when he needs to prove himself that he is a man after visiting dr . goode .
the doctor ( hawtrey ) is sworn to secrecy : - " i assure you , that anything you say to me today will go in one ear and straight out of the other ! "
bernard thinks he is having a sex change and needs to prove himself .
there are great cameos from joan sims , an expectant mother who is many weeks overdue and is eating constantly in every scene , and from kenneth connor as the expectant father who still thinks he's at work ( at the railway station ) .
sid james' gang including cyril his son ( kenneth cope ) try to find out where the pills are by getting cyril to dress up as a nurse and live in at the nurses home .
he has to share a room with nurse ball ( barbara windsor ) and she soon sees through him !
the film ends with the attempted robbery of the hospital's pills with panic ensuing .
there are good performances by hattie jacques as the matron , however her character seems a little more subdued and quieter than her previous 'matron's' .
williams is , as usual , on top form , but sid james isn't given a very good part in this movie and i would forgive anyone to forget that he was in the movie at all .
the same does not go for charles hawtrey , for although he only first appears in the movie after 30 minutes gone and has scarce screen time , he seems to steal every scene he is in .
by not making use of sid james and barbara windsor's talent to full effect , the film seems to flounder , but it certainly makes up for it with it's good storyline and it's other appealing characters .
this film is genuinely funny and i could watch it again and again and not get bored !
| pos | Positive |
because the press screening of " planet of the apes " was one day past last issue's deadline , i was afforded the opportunity to see the film a second time , listen to audience reactions and read a heap of reviews before writing this piece .
the chief complaints of those who disliked the futuristic adventure appear to be that the movie focused on visuals instead of substance , that the story was thin , that mark wahlberg's character was colorless and that the surprise ending sucked .
to those people i would like to say ? what the hell did you expect ?
this is a tim burton movie , boys and girls .
tim burton movies have great art direction and thin , clunky stories .
for the blissfully nasty , disjointed and underrated " mars attacks ! "
( jonathan rosenbaum of the chicago reader and i were two of the only critics in america to praise the movie ) burton reportedly tossed vintage " mars attacks ! "
trading cards onto the floor and based his story on the ones that landed face up .
burton's re-imagining of the 1968 story of an astronaut that lands on a planet where apes rule men looks great .
the apes , courtesy of make-up magician rick baker , are dazzling and ape city is a wonder to behold .
like astronaut leo davidson ( wahlberg ) , the film hits the ground running , whisking viewers through a head-spinning series of solid one-liners and engaging vignettes and establishing a sense of thrust that carries us through the more traditional fight scenes that come later .
as for wahlberg , consider what burton does with his character .
from his start as a filmmaker , burton has shown his fascination with colorful misfits ( pee-wee herman , the joker , ed wood , the ack-acking martians , etc . ) and lack of interest in standard issue heroes .
so leo davidson spends most of the movie getting the living shit kicked out of him before the biggest guilt trip in history is dropped on his shoulders .
as for lack of color , remember , leo only launches into space to get his monkey back .
he doesn't want to lead humanity and he isn't looking for romance from a pretty , but dull human ( estella warren ) or a dynamic ape ( helena bonham carter , terrific as an equal-rights activist ) .
as a man who just wants out , wahlberg is focused , subtle and sly .
the surprise ending provides the requisite shock ( and some more dandy visuals , particularly of the approaching authority figures ) , but admittedly isn't nearly as satisfying as the one in the original .
for the original ending to work , we only had to make one simple connection , for this one , we have to write a whole new screenplay .
the 1968 " apes " boasted a handful of great scenes , cool looking monkeys , a deliciously hammy performance by charlton heston ( who appears uncredited here as an aged chimp on his deathbed , re-delivering a classic line ) and a killer ending .
but viewers had to suffer through numerous dull stretches punctuated by social and political messages delivered with the grace of a wrecking ball .
the 2001 " planet of the apes " offers a different set of great scenes , much cooler looking monkeys , fine acting from wahlberg , bonham carter , paul giamatti and tim roth , and a not so good ending .
it also gives us another chance to experience the skewed vision of tim burton and that's nothing to complain about .
| pos | Negative |
dear god , this is a fantastically bad film !
regardless of what i say about knock off , you can't grasp its awfulness from my words .
you have to see it and experience it for yourself .
here's the kicker , though -- i suggest that you do so .
yes , this is a bad film -- easily one of the most incompetent films of the year -- but it has a certain misguided charm that makes it a unique kind of disaster to endure .
in fact , i enjoyed myself for most of its brief running time , despite the dreadful acting and a completely incomprehensible story .
don't get me wrong : i'm not excusing knock off .
it reaches an unacceptable level of badness ; it's so incoherent that i wonder if it was hacked up worse than the avengers was .
it also features some truly terrible performances from lela rochon , michael wong , paul sorvino , and -- of course -- jean-claude van damme .
it does , however , have the entertaining presence of rob schneider , and the excessively inventive and pretentious direction of tsui hark .
as i watched it , i occasionally wondered if it was aware of its own awfulness .
now , in retrospect , it seems clear that it wasn't , but it's still a fascinating kind of mess .
i don't like writing plot descriptions ( it is , by far , the most boring part of writing a review ) , but , in this case , i'm off the hook : there is no way i could write an accurate synopsis for knock off .
for the sake of comparison , i had no trouble understanding the usual suspects during my first viewing .
i paid closer attention to knock off , and the only thing i am able to say about it is that van damme plays a dude named ray , and is accused by the cia ( i think ) of selling knock off products ( knock off products are , of course , products that look like name-brand materials but are generic and cheap ) .
i don't know what any of this has to do with martial arts , but there are lots of martial arts in the film .
ray is good at martial arts , so when he has to beat up bad guys , there's no problem .
rob schneider plays his sidekick , although i had no idea who he really was by the end of the film .
lela rochon is just some woman who accuses them of stuff , while paul sorvino is both the good guy and the bad guy at once !
in fact , every character goes through so many shifts from good to bad that the end provides absolutely no insight into what any of them really do .
in that order , knock off is completely incoherent and makes absolutely no sense .
but what a strange mess it is .
it was written by stephen e . de souza , who also wrote die hard and 48 hours .
can this be the same man ?
i don't see how , unless , of course , huge chunks of the film have been removed for the sake of running time .
knock off seems to have an interesting premise ( as far as action films go ) , but there's no semblance here .
for instance , van damme is introduced , and then seconds later he's running a chariot race through the streets of hong kong .
why ?
who knows .
what are the implications of this ?
i have no idea .
most action films abandon depth in favor of action , and this is normally a problem .
knock off , however , is the first film that i would have preferred to see with all of the talky sequences cut .
the acting is embarrassingly bad : rochon , in particular , delivers each of her lines with stiff and talentless insincerity .
sorvino , in addition , deserves better than this .
van damme is bad , but he's charming in that bad way , and so i can't say that he's hard to watch ( although i rarely understood what he was saying ) .
the only exception is rob schneider , who is actually quite funny a lot of the time .
tsui utilizes so many tricks that he makes john woo look tame by comparison .
they're all pointless gimmicks though , such as shots of the inner-workings of a knock off running shoe .
but his action scenes are never boring : one particular piece inside of a fruit factory ( a fruit factory ? ) is well-choreographed .
lots of the scenes are pitched well to comedy , such as our heroes' first encounter with the rochon character .
but did tsui know that his film is beyond ludicrous ?
i hope he did , for the alternative is a frightening thought .
knock off has the feel of a truly terrible exercise in camp mania .
if it were boring , i'd give it zero stars .
but it's not boring : it's loud and excessive and completely incoherent .
it's also funny , even when it isn't meaning to be funny .
a bad film that succeeds as entertainment doesn't deserve to be fully lambasted .
i recognize knock off for its irrefutable badness , but i can't deny it's zany , useless charm .
oh , i know , they're just action scenes looking desperately for a real story , but they're fun action scenes amongst a crowd of laughably inane concepts .
it's fun to admire the awfulness of a film like this , but that doesn't excuse the fact that it is , indeed , awful .
| neg | Negative |
synopsis : blond criminal psychologist sarah chooses to copulate with greasy tony the mysterious puerto rican rather than bearded cliff the wisecracking neighbor upstairs .
in the meantime , someone sends sarah rotting flowers , puts her name in the newspaper's obituary column , and kills her cat .
comments : never talk to strangers , a colossal waste of time , moves slower than molasses in winter to arrive at a conclusion which should be obvious to the audience 20 minutes into the film .
one wouldn't think that two genuine movie stars , antonio banderas ( evita ) and rebecca de mornay ( hand that rocks the cradle ) , and the acerbic comic genius dennis miller ( " saturday night live " ) would be involved in such a celluloid backfire as this turkey .
not only are they in it , however , but de mornay executive produced it .
what was she thinking ?
never talk to strangers centers upon sarah , a psychologist examining the ill-tempered max , a murderer soon to stand trial .
she receives a sudden visit from her father which elicits flashbacks of some tragedy in her early childhood .
two men woo her ; tony the " security consultant " wins her over ( so they have passionate sex replete with cheesy saxophone music ) .
a lot of psychobabble is thrown around about multiple personality disorder , but the movie asks its audience not to derive the obvious conclusion between mpd and sarah , and instead offers several male characters as red herrings .
86 minutes , the running time of this cinematic mess , thus , seem like 86 hours .
a good chunk of never talk to strangers is spent upon sarah and tony .
why would the career-minded , professional sarah feel attracted to the walking steroid with a black hat called tony ?
that's one of the film's mysteries which are never answered .
regardless of motive , de mornay and banderas strip down and have sex several times in what passes for eroticism .
they also manage to go out before copulating occasionally -- in one of the stupidest scenes of the film , tony takes sarah to a carnival that's * right outside * his dingy apartment ( that way , they can hurry back and have sex quickly ) .
also , apparently , the weather changes quickly in their locale : they're at this outdoor carnival one day before having sex ; the next day , they're out playing in the snow before having sex .
the filmmakers attempt to produce a suspenseful plot interspersed with tony and sarah's " character development . "
someone is out to get poor sarah ( though most of the audience should have figured out who before any of this starts ) .
rotting flowers , a writeup in the obituary , and a beaten neighbor are just a few of the bad things which happen to her .
suspense cliche number one also occurs : whenever someone is stalked in thrillers , by any means , if the stalked has a pet , that pet will die .
oftentimes , to even further the cliche , the murdered pet is a cat ( suspense filmmakers , for some reason , just don't like cats ) .
sarah , in never talk to strangers , receives a package and , lo and behold , discovers her mutilated cat within .
suspense at its very derivative !
as stated before , never talk to strangers is a poor excuse for a film whose sole purpose seems to be exploiting banderas and de mornay's bodies as often as possible .
comedian dennis miller is completely wasted here ( he's not given lines that are suitable for his persona ) and doesn't even appear all that much .
maybe , in a way , he's lucky for that .
early on in the movie , sarah tells tony , after meeting him in a supermarket , that she had been advised to never talk to strangers .
allow me to advise that you never watch this stinker .
| neg | Negative |
i actually am a fan of the original 1961 or so live-action-disney flick of the same name starring hayley mills twice as a pair of twins , separated at birth by divorcing parents , never to come in contact with the other so the parents never have to meet again .
and everyone should know how i feel about remakes , especially of films i happen to enjoy ( my fallacy : unless you're going to either capture the same exact spirit of the original or do something different with it or maybe even both , just wrack your brain and come up with a * gasp * new idea ) .
this remake was not originally on the top of my viewing list , and was actually quite the opposite .
contemporary live-action-disney films are not one of my favorties , anyway : they're usually unfunny , alienating , and a big fat bore , at least to anyone over the age of 11 and above the iq of 10 .
this one , however , is shockingly not bad .
in fact , it's actually good .
not the original good , but what's great about it is that it doesn't necessarily retread the original or capture the same exact spirit as it does become entertaining for the same exact reasons the original was entertaining .
because it's cute and innocent fun .
because it has a pretty killer plot that is endlessly fun to follow along with .
because the lead star is immensely appealing .
because the parents are also immensely appealing .
and ( i'm repeating myself ) because it's cute and innocent fun .
there's nothing too risque about it , save the plot ( the idea of separating twins and denying them the truth for years is ominously selfish , but that is precisely the point of the movie ) , and it's aimed directly at either kids , adults who want to remember the original , or young adults who want to remember what it was like to be a kid .
i , personally , am somewhere between the second and third .
i can vividly remember when my taste in movies wasn't so weird or diverse ( the names godard and kubrick weren't even a glimmer in my right eye back then ) , when i would tune in every sunday night for a couple years to see abc's " wonderful world of disney , " where they'd show you a live-action and/or made-for-tv disney flick an hour per week .
i can remember my mom taking my sister and i along with all my friends and their mothers to see all the rereleased disney films ( like " lady and the tramp " and " pinnochio " ) .
and , most sadly , i remember every single christmas , without fail , there were a barage of children's animated half-hour shows , made exclusively for the christmas season , that i wouldn't dare missing .
i can even remember seeing the made-for-tv " parent trap ii " on tv one night , and after i had seen that one over and over and over again , i saw the original " parent trap . "
it's more of a late childhood movie , because it deals with the issue of divorce , but it deals with it in a disney-ized version .
it's playful , and witty , and charming , and if i saw it for the first time right now , having never experienced that part of my childhood , i'd probably dismiss it .
i'd probably do the same for the new version of the same movie if i hadn't seen the original at such a perfect age .
watching it , i could remember what fun it was to watch a disney film , and how divorce for me started to get me thinking about the possibilities of my seemingly-perfect parents splitting up , and how it affected my adolescence .
and also how it brushed that fear off with a smooth stroke , and pointed out that even in the most fucked-up of situations , things could always work out if you , well , manipulate things a bit , at least for the better .
this new version did that for me , but it's also charming in its own way .
it has a new cast , a contemporary feel , and , for the first time in awhile for a live-action-disney flick , a tone that isn't corny or condescending , but just right .
the moments that would otherwise seem corny are actually affecting in a safe kind of way .
and for the first time since the original film , the kids actually know better than the foolish adults .
the story is basically classic by now , repeated almost as many times as kurosawa's " the seven samurai " : a pair of twins ( played here by lindsay lohan , just like they were played by hayley mills in the original ) are separated at birth by their divorcing parents .
one , annie , is sent to live with the mother ( natasha richardson , resembling her mother , vanessa redgrave , more than i had ever noticed ) in london , where she lives with her parents and her devoted , foppish butler ( simon kunz ) , as she works as a swingin' fashion designer .
she grows up refined and classy , but also with a keen knowledge in sports and poker-playing .
the other , hallie , is sent to northern california with her father ( dennis quaid ) to live on a vineyard with their pseudo-maid ( lisa ann walter ) , and grows up rugged yet charming .
they both meet at the same camp , one that annie wants to go to to become more rugged .
they feud because they look all-too similar , and are thus in tight competition , which results in some nasty pranks , which winds them in seclusion together in a private , out-of-the-way cabin .
there , they become friends , then learn about eachother .
once they know everything , they concoct a scheme to switch places so the one can meet the other parent , whom they've only heard of .
they learn about eachother's lives in detail , they make sure they look alike ( which requires hair cutting and , notoriously , ear-piercing - a scene which is like the kiddie version of the hypodermic needle scene in " pulp fiction " ) , and when the end of summer comes , they switch and hope for the best .
lindsay lohan doesn't necessarily copy the acting style of hayley mills in the original .
but she comes off just as appealing as she did once .
she does , though , add a couple new things : she makes the california twin a little more appealing and the london twin a bit more frank and snobbish than the snotty and proper original , respectively .
she also adds on an american and british accent to each one , with one faking the other accent throughout , and if you really take notice , you can see that the fake ones' accents aren't exactly perfect .
she's also incredibly appealing , not merely cute , which is especially notable since this is her first feature film , and we know how notorious child actors are , especially in their first films .
she makes a great protagonist , and it only helps that the supporting cast is equally appealing .
dennis quaid , in fact , hasn't been this likable in about a decade - his big dumb smile and near cocky attitude is what has made him a notable actor in the past , not just that he's mr . meg ryan .
ditto natasha richardson ( except that she just hasn't ever been this likable period ) .
the two make a winning couple , maybe not so winning as maureen o'hara and the late brian keith in the original , but they still work for this film .
instead of the bickering that ensued in the original , the film adds another dimension and another angle to their characters that was amiss in the original : during the opening credits , we see glimpses from their courtship on the qe2 , where they fall quickly and madly in love with eachother , and when back together again , the film's more smarmy scenes come off as actually sentimental , but in that great way , not the migraine-inducing way as in many such films .
this all brings this new " parent trap " to a level of entertainment that hasn't really existed since , well , the original film years ago , still my money the best live-action-disney flick of all time .
this is because it has a form of intelligence and wit that makes such plot points as an otherwise standard villainous love interest subplot ( a gold-digging sharon stone type , played by elaine hendrix , who's deliciously tormented by the twins later on in the film ) a treat instead of a bore .
like the original , this film transcends all the crap that it very well could be ( case in point : " it takes two " starring the olsen twins ) because it treats the children as the smart ones , and the adults as the silly ones , not the other way around .
and because , above everything , it knows exactly how to be charming without biting off more than it can chew .
however , in comparison with the original , it could be a bit better .
certain scenes work well , but not nearly as well as they worked in the original .
i liked the way the parents fought over past dilemnas and then fought over falling in love again better than i liked watching two old flames getting back together over a bottle of wine - somehow , feuding is always more cinematic and pleasing than mere reminscing , a lesson extracted from the howard hawks/cary grant films of yesteryear .
and as much as this film transcends mere cutedom , compared to the original , this film almost drowns in cutedom .
the original , though not gritty , was far more stylized and just as suitable for adult audiences as it was for young audiences .
as such , this remake may never be nearly as great or classic as the original film , but it at least knows how to treat its source material with dignity and respect , and how to create virtually the same effects without bordering on plagerism or petty annoyances .
| pos | Positive |
way of the gun is brimming with surprises , some good , most bad .
one of the good ones is ryan phillippe's surprisingly halfway decent performance .
after the actor gained much attention by posing and preening through teen swill like i know what you did last summer , he hinted at a bit growth in last year's cruel intentions with his amusingly contemptuous john malkovich meets james spader performance , though his acting in that film faltered around the third act mark , precisely when the screenplay made his character grow a heart ( presumably to appeal to his training bra wearing fans ) and start bellyaching about how he'd fallen for his " target " .
it was a dramatic shift that neither phillippe nor the film's director could negotiate .
but he seems to be trying and that shouldn't be overlooked ( or probably over praised ) seeing as how , at this point , he really isn't required to do much but look pretty .
here , phillippe has procured a five day growth of beard , his hair askew and his affect altered to sound something like james cagney in all his " look here , see " glory .
it's tough to believe a pretty boy like phillippe as a hard ass , but his performance actually helps with the illusion .
unlike ben affleck's puppy dog approach in reindeer games , phillippe is believable and not too bad at that .
as for the plot , well , that's one of the bad surprises ; phillippe and the great benicio del torro play two moronic ( and not even remotely likeable ) criminals ( introduced to us in the parking lot of a rave where they stupidly pick a fight with about twenty people ) who hatch a scheme to kidnap a surrogate mother ( juliette lewis ) after overhearing that she's carrying the baby of painter ( scott wilson ) , a very well connected wealthy man .
the kidnapping devolves into a laborious shoot out where much damage is done and many are killed .
but the anti-heroes escape with the woman while an aging hit man ( james caan ) and two scheming bodyguards ( taye diggs and nicky katt ) remain in pursuit .
directed by christopher mcquarrie , the screenwriter who won an oscar for his work on usual suspects , an overrated piece of crime noir in many circles ( this one included ) , way of the gun is a hodgepodge of crime thriller motifs that just oozes eye rolling familiarity .
unlike phillipe , mcquarrie doesn't seem to be growing at all ; he fills his flick with a sprawling labyrinth of plot all snatched from movies i know i've seen before and worse , it feels like it .
the film lacks even a fresh approach ( like what soderbergh did out of sight or the limey ) to its clich ? s , all of which are spewed before us in a picture that tries so desperately to be hip and gritty without bothering to notice how common it is .
it features characters living by a code they seemed to have picked up in sam peckinpah 101 rather than any thing resembling life .
even attempts at emotional weight feel strained like in preposterous scene where enemies james caan and benicio del torro stop in their tracks to have a cup of coffee and pontificate on life , philosophy , etc . i didn't like the bit much when it first appeared in heat , here , it's even more self consciously " dramatic " .
usual suspects , which also featured a bunch of low lives that seemed to live by a code they learned from the movies , worked to some degree because of that astonishing twist ending .
nowadays an astonishing twist per ending is de rigeur , never mind if it deems all that transpired before it completely inconsequential .
thus , nearly every character in way comes with at least one dirty little secret ( most amateurishly projected before they appear ) and it too has an ironic little twist at the end ( nothing earth shattering , like in the usual suspects ) but i admit , i didn't see it coming , and i smiled .
however most of the movie feels exactly like the interrogation scenes between palminteri and spacey in usual suspects : a lot of faux huffing and puffing with no rhythm or reason .
or substance .
it's just as overplotted as suspects , and often dull as any overplotted movie without interesting characters , a distinctive style , or a good script would be .
even the good stuff , most of which involves james caan ( doing a fine job ) , feels odd and out of place in a movie that thinks lines like " karma is only justice with out the satisfaction " are clever .
at one point caan laments " need is the ultimate monkey " a line so inexplicable he might as well have said " love is like hippo ass " .
i've seen porno with better dialogue .
and some with better plot lines too .
but rarely has porn offered up such a talented cast ( i mean , can you even compare james caan to ron jeremy ) .
caan slips into this role with seeming ease , he could do this kind of soft-spoken tough guy in a coma , but he manages to give his character depth and weariness .
benicio del torro is always welcome , though here he plays it fairly straight ( rather than another oddball character creation like the ones the actor gave us in usual suspects and excess baggage ) , adopting a brad pitt-esque quizzical pout to go along with his heavy swaggering .
speaking of pitt , his ex , juliette lewis , is a weak link , either shouting her lines with ear shattering shrillness , or waddling about like a silly goose .
nicky katt was brilliant in a brief role in the limey , here his role is just as brief only he seems wasted ; he's only kept around for his cold presence .
taye diggs has a similar function , cool as ever , but never a character , though the guy has one helluva death scene .
for the most part way is incessantly talky with no reason to give a hippo's ass about any thing that transpires since its characters are never more than simplistic pawns .
it's vaguely tarantino-ish , but in a bad truth and consequences nm way , with phillippe , in one scene , leaping into a stupid rant about " faggots " migrating to los angeles .
you know the routine .
the final shoot out is pure bargain basement john woo ( who himself seems to be doing bargain basement john woo ) with interchangeable bad guys lining up to be shot at .
but those gun shots sure crack like thunder .
just the other day i was watching an old dirty harry movie on cable and was stunned to hear the weak elephant grunt-like sound that emanated from harry's fetishized smith and wesson .
oh how far we've come .
| neg | Negative |
marie ( charlotte rampling , " aberdeen " ) and jean ( bruno cremet , " sorcerer " ) are a comfortable , sixty-ish married couple looking forward to a peaceful vacation at their second home in lit et mix .
on their first , full day , marie sunbathes as jean goes for a swim .
hours later , marie's initiated a full scale search when jean hasn't returned , but no trace of him is found .
marie returns to paris and resumes her life , including chats with jean at the end of each day in francois ozon's " under the sand . "
marie's ex-pat british friend amanda ( alexandra stewart , " frantic " ) and her french husband gerard ( pierre vernier ) try to snap marie out of her denial with a dinner party , where they introduce her to the handsome vincent ( jacques nolot , " nenette et boni " ) , yet marie suggests that gerard accompany her and jean to their gym the next morning .
eventually marie does begin dating vincent , but she discusses him with jean and even smiles at jean , hidden behind a bedroom curtain , when she makes love to vincent .
slowly , though , reality continues to chip away at marie's fantasy life .
her bank advises her that without access to jean's account , she needs to reduce her spending .
one of her university students ( she's reading virginia woolf's " the waves " ) turns out to be one of the young men who participated in the beach search .
then police arrive asking her to identify the clothing of a body they've found washed up from the ocean .
that night , jean's not at home when she returns to their apartment .
her mother-in-law ( andree tainsy ) cruelly
insists that jean simply abandoned her out of boredom .
finally , marie goes to the police , insisting on viewing the body .
horrified ( she's been warned it was
in an advanced state of putrefaction ) , she laughs when handed a bagged watch , insisting that this is not her husband .
" under the sand " is a character study and melancholy portrait of aging ( 'i've lost my youth , ' marie declares ) and loss .
charlotte rampling , given the chance to portray an older , yet still sexual , woman runs with it , bringing us into the mind of the character .
her chemistry with bruno cremet is startlingly natural .
as marie returns from her first date with vincent , she sits on the couch with jean .
'did he kiss you ? ' he asks .
the mood the two create is incredibly intimate and sad .
ozon ( " water drops on burning rocks , " " see the sea " ) , who cowrote the script with emmanuelle bernheim , marcia romano , and marina de van , has turned in a more mature work than his previous , creepy " see the sea . "
while he cleverly never lets us see jean enter the water that fateful day , leaving a number of possibilities - accident ? , suicide ? , escape ?
- open , he definitely tips his hand towards a certain outcome .
cinematography by antoine hiberli and jeanne lapoirie ( " water drops on burning rocks " ) glides around marie ( their 180 shot as she initially searches the ocean's horizon for a sign of jean conveys her panic ) or captures rampling's exotic face in mood divining closeup .
in an inventive fantasy scene , marie imagines jean's hands massaging her feet while in a state of auto-arousal .
his two hands become four , then more combined with her own , becoming almost a one person orgy and recalling roman polanski's " repulsion . "
original music by philippe rombi quietly adds to the overall melancholy .
" under the sand " is a unique portrait of loss .
it would make an fascinating double bill with liv ullmann's " faithless " from earlier this year , another character study of a woman facing loss for different reasons .
| pos | Negative |
blatantly borrowing elements from 1993's " like water for chocolate " and 1991's " the butcher's wife , " " simply irresistible " attempts to be a whimsical romantic comedy but , more often than not , comes off as laughable , leaving you to wonder why rising star sarah michelle gellar ( t . v . 's " buffy , the vampire slayer " ) would choose such an obviously inept film project to waste her time on .
things get off to a bad start right from the onset as amanda ( sarah michelle gellar ) , a young woman who runs her late family's struggling new york restaurant , runs into a mystery man who forces a bushel of crabs on her and then vansihes into thin air .
while out shopping , she also meets tom ( sean patrick flanery ) , a charming , handsome man , who happens to be planning a ritzy restaurant for the department store he works for , and later when he decides to drop by her dive , called southern cross , for lunch , she somehow makes a delicious crab dish for him , even though she is known to not be a very good chef .
suddenly , amanda finds her restaurant , on the edge of foreclosure , rejuvenate to life as customer begin to swarm for her food , which strangely causes everyone immediate jubilation when it hits their mouths .
are amanda and tom destined to be together ?
and is it not just because of the magical food , but because they really , truly like each other ?
and what exactly is going on with the food she is making ?
does it have anything to do with that pesky crab she got that sits on the shelf in the kitchen somehow assisting her in her food preparation ?
" simply irresistible " is a ridiculous and just plain goofy romantic fantasy that's as flimsy as a slice of bologna .
it takes one joke---that people who eat the food are taken aback by it in most unusual ways---and recycles it over and over again until the film has reached an appropriate running time of 95 minutes .
add in a music montage every ten minutes ( these are actually the best scenes in the movie , which certainly tells you something about the film itself ) , and what you've got is an utterly empty , if not necessarily boring , excursion .
the cast of " simply irresistible " is fairly good , but it is the supporting characters who are the most interesting .
patricia clarkson ( 1998's " high art , " in which she played a drugged-out lesbian ) is a standout as tom's colleague , and is thankfully given a few funny lines of dialogue .
also of note is larry gilliard jr . , as amanda's cooking assistant and buddy , who is allowed to create a seemingly full character out of only a handful of scenes .
of the main stars , sarah michelle gellar is fine , but really does often look like she's struggling through the unmistakably clumsy material , and if sean patrick flanery plans on keeping a film career in the future , he has certainly got to pick better projects than this .
the bottom line is that " simply irresistible " is the exact opposite of its deprophesized title , and when the movie got to the point where the characters began to float in mid-air ( an unamusing plot device that was repeated in the stupid last scene ) , my mind checked out from the characters and the romance .
when i think about it in hindsight , i should have checked out in the very first scene , where the point of the action was for gellar to crawl under tables looking for a runaway mechanical crab .
now , that certainly is what i'd call magical !
| neg | Negative |
in a typical cinematic high school , the football jocks have sex with the girls and then dump them , but not before the boys' scores are dutifully recorded in their little black books .
as the sexual acts take place , the other guys hang out nearby , guzzling beer and grunting like pigs .
in the rage : carrie 2 , robert mandel's terminally bland sequel to carrie , there isn't a single original moment .
only amy irving returns from carrie , and the talent of the rest of the sequel's cast is impossible to determine given the stupefying mediocrity of rafael moreu's script .
as rachel , the horror story's lead , emily bergl gives one of the least scary performances in recent memory , but it isn't exactly her fault .
the director asks for little from his actors , which is precisely what he gets .
sporadically in this lame and lifeless movie , rachel will cause school lockers and windows to fly open , but generally she just mopes around looking like a victim .
her fellow students delight in tormenting her .
of course , she will get her revenge in the obligatory ending bloodbath in which she will decapitate and castrate the boys and crush the girls with burning timbers .
as the movie marks time until its big finale , it throws in some repugnant scenes , hoping to turn audience's stomachs .
rachel's girlfriend commits a horrible and realistic suicide after the boy who made " love " to her the night before spurns her .
( he gets major points in his black book for this , but his buddies say he would have gotten more if he had had sex with her after her death . )
even a helpless puppy is run over , and we see his poor , little body flipping over and over under a truck .
the teenagers in the movie are completely blas ? about it all .
" doesn't it offend you that some girl offed herself yesterday , " asks one of the few kids with a conscience .
" why ? "
responds his nonplussed girlfriend .
" she wasn't anybody . "
remarkably devoid of any energy , especially for a horror flick , the movie makes one yearn for a fast forward button on the theater's armrest .
with material this bad , the film's only hope is to go for parody , but it isn't smart enough to realize it .
even the mandatory epilogue is as pointless and predictable as the rest of the movie .
the rage : carrie 2 runs 1 : 45 .
it is rated r for graphic violence , teen alcohol abuse , sex , nudity and profanity and would be acceptable only for older teenagers .
| neg | Negative |
note : some may consider portions of the following text to be spoilers .
be forewarned .
the teaser trailers for my best friend's wedding scarsely gave reason for hope - it looked like the sort of goofy , light-hearted comedy than might put julia roberts back in the limelight , but little more ; i'd frankly rarely seen a trailer place such an emphasis on people falling over for laughs so often .
it was then to both my surprise and my delight to find that my best friend's wedding was such a success - a strong , bouyant romantic-comedy with some decidedly unconventionally quirky comic aspects , featuring a triumphant performance from ms . roberts .
the heroine of my best friend's wedding is julianne potter ( julia roberts ) , a successful new york restaurant critic , and we open the film with a whimsical revelation to her editor george downes ( rupert everett ) that years ago , she had made a pact with her dear best friend and ex-lover michael o'neal ( dermot mulroney ) , a sports writer , that if they both hadn't married by the time they reached 28 , they had promised to marry each other .
both julianne and michael are both single , of course , and when george inquires about michael's age , julianne realizes that he's mere weeks away from his 28th birthday , and is quite distressed when she receives a phone call from michael later that day .
however , she finds herself even more distraught when michael's call is in regards to his impending marriage to heiress kimmy wallace ( cameron diaz ) , and when he asks julianne to fly down to chicago for the wedding , julianne suddenly realizes that she loves michael , and resolves to break up the wedding and steal the groom by any means necessary .
the setup for my best friend's wedding , then , is a fairly conventional one , and in many ways the film's storyline is formulaic - but only to a certain extent : the film was directed by p . j . hogan , whose first feature , muriel's wedding , had quite an offbeat tone for a traditional uplifting ugly-duckling story , and the same holds true for my best friend's wedding , which confidently combines traditional romantic-comedy elements with a really eccentric sense of humour .
the film is innundated with sly mischievousness which seems clearly the influence of mr . hogan .
for example , there's a heartfelt , emotional exchange between julianne and michael late in the film - with a trio of teenagers , inhaling helium and sounding every bit like alvin and the chipmunks , harmonizing in the background .
my best friend's wedding opens with an inspired opening credit sequence which sets the tone for the film , and there are scenes where actors spontaneously burst into song to good comic effect - it could almost be argued that this film is nearly as much of a musical as woody allen's everyone says i love you ; i'd even assert it's a more successful one .
my best friend's wedding keeps breaking conventionality with its characters as well .
in a typical romantic-comedy , kimmy would be portrayed as a snooty , conniving ice queen , and the audience would be cheering for julianne to rescue michael from her grasps ; this film is smarter than that - here , kimmy is sweet , sincere , and innocent ; julianne even admits at one point that had she not resolved to utterly destroy kimmy's life , she'd actually like her too .
the george character is almost a staple of recent film - the homosexual male friend of the heroine who acts as a confidant and provides the guiding voice of reason - but in my best friend's wedding , he gets to have a playful , mischievous and charming personality .
throughout the film , the formulaisms one often sees is romantic-comedy are given little twists , and the result is a film which is compelling all the way to its somewhat unorthodox conclusion .
there is a lot of smart writing in the well-paced screenplay by ronald bass ; we're given four interesting , vivid , and likeable characters , with some good dialogue and some genuinely charming and touching moments .
my best friend's wedding marks a strong career rebound for julia roberts , who turns in a top-notch , confident and reassured performance as julianne .
this isn't the sort of role one usually associates with ms . roberts - the julianne character's neurotic , fumbling characteristics are more in line with a meg ryan role - but ms . roberts works wonderfully in the film and demonstrates her aptitude at comedy here , remaining compelling and empathetic to the audience , if not entirely sympathetic , even when her deeds done to destroy the wedding plans of her best friend are less than honourable .
even better than ms . roberts though is cameron diaz , who turns in a shining performance in my best friend's weddding .
with a smile which lights up the screen , she effectively conveys kimmy's insecurity and utter sweetness in an endearing manner , and never hits a false note in the film .
she even sings - i won't soon forget her charming serenade of " i just don't know what to do with myself " .
rupert everett is given a very juicy role as george , and he makes the most of it with a hilarious turn which makes his character perhaps the most vivid and most memorable in the film .
his george is a bit of a devilish rogue , entirely affable , and mr . everett's performance is a delight to watch ; he's clearly having fun , and his joy is infectuous .
dermot mulroney is adequate in a thankless role - unlike the other characters in the film , he's not given a lot to do , but there is a genuine onscreen chemistry between ms . roberts and mr . mulroney , and consequently the longstanding friendship between his michael character and the julianne character always seemed completely authentic .
when julia roberts' lustre began to fade , and she was usurped from her title as " america's sweetheart " by sandra bullock , i thought it was a canny career move on her part to take supporting roles in prestige projects like michael collins and everyone says i love you to raise her profile .
while that didn't quite work out , it's near-certain that her successful return to the genre which made her a big star back in 1990 , the romantic-comedy , will once again raise her ante in the hollywood game .
my best friend's wedding marks a return to form for ms . roberts , and cements p . j . hogan's reputation as a skilled director of comedy .
| pos | Positive |
not so long ago , men by the names of peckinpah , ford , leone , and eastwood made westerns .
real westerns .
these were some of the best films of the twentieth century .
those days are gone .
now we have crap like wild wild west to pass for the western .
and that record is not improved with the unbearable tale of american outlaws .
outlaws is yet another re-telling of the jesse james legend , courtesy of b-movie king james g . robinson ( producer of such classics as wrongfully accused and chill factor ) .
delayed since the spring , this version stars the irish hunka hunka burning love colin farrell ( the best part of schumacher's tigerland ) as the bad-ass jesse james .
alas , any sense of his character has been left on the ranch , leaving us with only cute chicks like ali larter ( minus the whipped cream ) to watch .
the spin this time around : fresh from serving as southern militiamen in the civil war , jesse james ( farrell ) , his brother frank ( gabriel macht ) , and his pal cole younger ( scott caan ) lay down their arms and head home to missouri to tend the family farms after the war has ended .
but trouble is brewing in their small town of liberty when evil railroad baron thaddeus rains ( harris yulin ) and his cronies rollin parker ( terry o'quinn ) and allan pinkerton ( timothy dalton ) demand the boys turn over their lands to the railroads .
the jameses and the youngers then join forces to fight the railroad -- by robbing banks up and down missouri , thus cutting off the railroad's financial surplus and playing robin hood to the local people .
along the way , the boys squabble over who's the cutest of the gang , who's the most popular cowboy in the gang , and who ought to go on mtv's total request live .
they rob numerous banks with identical interiors , always with the kindest of hearts , strutting in their grungy dusters as moby songs play in the background .
the witty banter they share could be plastered within a hallmark card .
the biggest disappointment here lies in the acting of colin farrell .
after a great job in tigerland , farrell walks through this role easier then nicolas cage in gone in 60 seconds .
and his american accent rivals richard gere's irish accent in the jackal .
combined with feeling like bonanza : the teen years , this homogenized production ( toned down to get the ever-popular pg-13 rating ) gives us an invincible jesse james that quickly grows tiresome and boring .
the unbearable villains courtesy of timothy dalton and thaddeus rains spend the entire film proclaiming that everyone should be hanged , sucking out any energy left in the film .
not to mention : the real story of jesse james and his gang bears no resemblance to the plot of american outlaws .
instead , the movie is full of old , outrageous tales about the wild west -- tales which went out of style in 5-cent magazines about a century ago .
| neg | Negative |
it is an understood passion and an understood calm .
bud white walks into the home of lynn bracken , a prostitute " cut to look like veronica lake . "
he's one of l . a . 's finest investigating the murder of fellow cop , and one of the leads takes him to her home .
it's understood that he is quiet thunder , a guy who's calm voice is more powerful than his arms .
it's understood that she's supposed to be beautiful , but underneath her face is pain and scraped out lines that say her life could have been so much more .
you know without having to be told .
" you're the first guy who hasn't told me i look like veronicca lake in under a minute , " she says .
" you look ten times better . "
he says it without thinking .
like he knows without her having to say anything .
white's face doesn't turn , it doesn't blush .
you see his eyes , and you believe him .
it's a perfect moment in a near perfect movie .
l . a . confidential is the best movie of the year .
it is grace and poetry ; a richly layered work of pure entertainment .
it is a portrait of police and morality as it works it's way through characters that are so real on screen that you believe that they might have a soul .
in a phrase , it is everything .
it is funny , it is exciting , has enough action and adventure and mystery and grace and suspense .
it is the pinnacle of a movie , a complete work , a flawless film .
it's hard to tell you about the plot , because it's about so much more than plot .
besides , there's too much to describe .
sure , it's about police and searching for corruption and who fights for the right reasons and the definition of justice .
but it's also about what you feel when you look into the eyes of the characters in the film .
director curtis hanson has perfectly framed each character , letting you see into them , rooting for them one moment , doubting them the next .
the actors work with their lines , but in this movie their most important weapon is their eyes .
you can tell what each person is feeling just by looking into their eyes for one moment .
russell crowe plays bud white , a muscle cop with a beef for wife beaters .
his movements are fierce .
when he strikes , you jump , when he's calm , you know it won't be for long .
his intensity oozes out of the screen .
you follow his character through the movie afraid of him , but in sympathy of him , because you know how good his heart is .
he's looking for a way to solve crimes , you're just never sure how he's going to do it .
his counter is ed exley , played with a chisselled face by guy pierce .
you feel for him , for his character , because of all the cops in the movie he's the one that's actually trying to do the right thing by going by the book .
you know that he must face the reality of breaking the book , and you love the way he gets there .
i've seen l . a confidential twice , immediately after it was over , i wanted to hit the rewind button and watch it again .
i didn't want the theater experience to end .
it's been a long time since i actually experienced a movie , feeling like i got something after i walked out .
that's why i love movies ; the great ones can be too rich and powerful to describe .
watch l . a . confidential : after you leave the theater , you feel like you just watched a classic movie .
that's why la confidential stands as the best movie of the year .
l . a . confidential ( directed by curtis hanson .
starring russell crowe , guy pierce , kevin spacey , james cromwell , and kim basinger .
| pos | Positive |
it is movies like these that make a jaded movie viewer thankful for the invention of the timex indiglo watch .
based on the late 1960's television show by the same name , the mod squad tells the tale of three reformed criminals under the employ of the police to go undercover .
however , things go wrong as evidence gets stolen and they are immediately under suspicion .
of course , the ads make it seem like so much more .
quick cuts , cool music , claire dane's nice hair and cute outfits , car chases , stuff blowing up , and the like .
sounds like a cool movie , does it not ?
after the first fifteen minutes , it quickly becomes apparent that it is not .
the mod squad is certainly a slick looking production , complete with nice hair and costumes , but that simply isn't enough .
the film is best described as a cross between an hour-long cop show and a music video , both stretched out into the span of an hour and a half .
and with it comes every single clich ? .
it doesn't really matter that the film is based on a television show , as most of the plot elements have been recycled from everything we've already seen .
the characters and acting is nothing spectacular , sometimes even bordering on wooden .
claire danes and omar epps deliver their lines as if they are bored , which really transfers onto the audience .
the only one to escape relatively unscathed is giovanni ribisi , who plays the resident crazy man , ultimately being the only thing worth watching .
unfortunately , even he's not enough to save this convoluted mess , as all the characters don't do much apart from occupying screen time .
with the young cast , cool clothes , nice hair , and hip soundtrack , it appears that the film is geared towards the teenage mindset .
despite an american 'r' rating ( which the content does not justify ) , the film is way too juvenile for the older mindset .
information on the characters is literally spoon-fed to the audience ( would it be that hard to show us instead of telling us ? ) , dialogue is poorly written , and the plot is extremely predictable .
the way the film progresses , you likely won't even care if the heroes are in any jeopardy , because you'll know they aren't .
basing the show on a 1960's television show that nobody remembers is of questionable wisdom , especially when one considers the target audience and the fact that the number of memorable films based on television shows can be counted on one hand ( even one that's missing a finger or two ) .
the number of times that i checked my watch ( six ) is a clear indication that this film is not one of them .
it is clear that the film is nothing more than an attempt to cash in on the teenage spending dollar , judging from the rash of really awful teen-flicks that we've been seeing as of late .
avoid this film at all costs .
| neg | Negative |
saving private ryan ( dreamworks ) running time : 2 hours 48 minutes .
starring tom hanks , edward burns , tom sizemore and matt damon directed by steven spielberg already being hailed as the 'greatest war movie ever made , ' saving private ryan is an harrowing , saddening and riveting movie .
it may not be the greatest war movie in my opinion , but it's certainly one of the best war movies made , and one of the best of 1998 .
tom hanks stars as a captain who's troop has to find private ryan ( damon ) who has a ticket home because his three brothers have been killed in action .
action , drama and even some humour occur as the troop journeys through wartime france to find him .
after the disappointing amistad ( 1997 ) spielberg has returned to form with this excellent movie .
i'm not the war movie genre biggest fan , but i found this film to be gripping , and very scary , thanks to the excellent cast , direction and terrifying battle scenes .
tom hanks is superb , straying away from his usually soppy dramatic roles , such as in forrest gump ( 1994 ) .
this time , he plays the role with gritty realism , and is much better for it .
occasionally he overacts the sentimentally , but he generally delivers a fine performance .
edward burns , looking a lot like armageddon's ben affleck , also delivers a top notch performance , moving away from his roles in films such as she's the one ( 1996 ) tom sizemore makes less of an impact , but is still watchable , and matt damon reinforcing his position as one of the finest young actors working today .
spielberg directs very well , putting the audience right in the heart of the action of the battle scenes .
and what battle scenes they are !
they're truly terrifying , yet the audience cannot drag their eyes away from the screen .
the battle scenes are filmed with a jerky hand-held camera , and the panic and confusion felt by the soldiers is emphasized by this technique .
the gore and violence isn't spared either , which body parts flying , and blood spurting .
this film is certainly not for kids and sensitive adults .
other factors help saving private ryan be a masterpiece of 90's film making .
the cinematography is excellent , and the music score by john william's is also superb .
it is never intrusive , and adds to the drama on-screen .
but while they are thousands of good things great about private ryan , there's one major flaw that detracts the genius of the film : the writing .
it is unusually flat , with many of the speeches strangely weak .
the film never really makes any profound statements .
this is not a major gripe , as private ryan is a film of action , not words .
still , the script could of been a lot better .
thankfully , the actors help partly to rectify the situation with their great delivery of their lines .
saving private ryan , in the end , is an excellent film , but not the 'greatest war movie' due to it's weak acting .
this film should be viewed by everyone who has the stomach for it , as it's rewarding and extremely worthwhile .
it really shouldn't be missed , and dreamworks skg has finally found it's first hit movie .
| pos | Positive |
if you're debating whether or not to see _breakfast_of_champions_ , ask yourself one simple question : do you want to see nick nolte in lingerie ?
the only people who would get much enjoyment from alan rudolph's chaotic adaptation of the kurt vonnegut novel is the cross-section of the population with the unhealthy urge to see that unpleasant sight .
everyone else--and i'm hoping that's most people--would be wise to steer clear of this excrutiatingly unfunny mess .
actually , though , the sight of nolte in high heels is one of the more amusing things about this muddle , which focuses dwayne hoover ( bruce willis ) , the owner of dwayne hoover's exit 11 motor village in midland city .
not only is he a huge success as a businessman , he's also something of a celebrity , his face made recognizable by an ongoing series of television commercials .
with a nice home and family to boot , dwayne appears to have it all the ingredients to be happy--yet he's not .
his wife celia ( barbara hershey ) is perpetually in a pill-induced haze ; his son george ( lukas haas ) is a flamboyant lounge singer who goes by the stage name " bunny . "
not only that , the environmental protection agency is on dwayne's ass over a building development project .
it's enough to send dwayne on a nervous breakdown--that is , if he doesn't succeed in blowing his brains out first .
meanwhile , midland city is about to host a fine arts festival , and the guest of honor is one kilgore trout ( albert finney ) , a writer who is far from the renowned author the festival's organizer ( buck henry ) was led to believe--in fact , he's a penniless hack who writes second-rate sci-fi that appears in porn magazines .
his trek to midland city is also a spiritual journey , one that reaches its apex after meeting dwayne , who for some reason thinks that trout will hold for him all of life's answers .
the above is already a longer plot synopsis than i usually give in my reviews , but , ironically , i have barely scratched the surface .
i haven't yet mentioned wayne hoobler ( omar epps ) , an ex-con with an obsessive admiration for the similarly-named dwayne .
then there's the matter of francine ( glenne headly ) , dwayne's devoted secretary .
not to mention dwayne's employee and old friend harry lesabre ( nolte ) , the one with the secret penchant for cross-dressing .
and so on .
the film is essentially dwayne's story , but too often rudolph goes on distracting tangents with the eccentric peripheral players that one often wonders what the point is .
rudolph does arrive at a point ( more on that later ) , but it's blunted and obscured by his hyperactive approach to the material .
the surreal visual style , complete with printed words flying through the air and into dwayne's ears , is obviously meant to convey a sense of madness , but its bludgeoning nature is likely to make viewers mad .
the actors are called on to act accordingly , resulting in some of the worst , most overdone work all of them have ever turned in .
willis fares best of all--but that's because his frozen expression of befuddled bewilderment mirrors that of the audience .
with such an aggressively outrageous atmosphere for nearly all of its running time , it comes as a shock when things suddenly turn serious , and rudolph tries to make a statement .
unlike _american_beauty_ ( a film that _breakfast_ resembles in more than a few ways , to its great detriment ) , there isn't any palpably earnest undercurrent that would prepare the audience for the big shift .
as such , the cartoony characters fail to win a sympathy that needs to be earned ; and the film attempts , to no avail , to reach a profundity that it doesn't deserve .
vonnegut's original novel is considered a classic , but it had been called unfilmable--the same that was said of hunter s . thompson's _fear_and_loathing_in_las_vegas_ , which was disastrously committed to film last year by terry gilliam .
with the similar failure of _breakfast_of_champions_ , will hollywood ever learn that books labeled " unfilmable " inevitably results in a film that is unwatchable ?
likely not .
| neg | Negative |
my giant is two movies for the price of one , but neither is worth the cost of admission , even if you get in free .
as lamely directed by michael lehmann , the picture tries to be a comedy by using and reusing every giant joke in the book .
( " without goliath , david is just some punk throwing rocks . " )
languidly paced throughout , the movie becomes increasingly lugubrious as the screenplay by david seltzer ( the omen ) meanders toward its sad ending .
since it's rarely funny or convincingly dramatic , what the filmmakers thought they were doing remains a mystery .
other than a few nice visuals , there's nothing to recommend the picture .
with great film comedies under his belt from when harry met sally ? to the original city slickers , billy crystal has shown that he's more than the world's best oscar host .
he does , however , have a propensity for choosing hopeless material as in last year's father's day and this year's my giant .
one wonders if he reads the script before agreeing to go ahead with a project .
surely reading the one for my giant would have shown that there was nothing there .
perhaps he thought he could ad lib it into success .
or maybe he wants to be a dramatic actor and thought he could do something serious with the movie's somber tone .
the most charitable thing that could be said about it is that it is so ineffectual that people will probably forget they saw it by the next day .
this one-joke movie's single idea is to place real-life basketball player gheorghe muresan , who stands seven and a half feet tall , into as many visually striking situations as possible .
sammy ( crystal ) , an agent currently without clients , is rescued after a car accident by a sweet romanian giant named max ( muresan ) .
after throwing out constant one-liners ( " either god is in the salvage business or big foot just took my car . " ) ,
sammy decides to get serious , seeing max as his meal ticket .
and although he doesn't like it , he's willing to sign max up to do disgusting events like a wrestling match with a half-dozen dwarfs .
( the movie itself knows no bounds as it contains one of the most putrid and lengthy vomiting scenes ever . )
after a series of missed opportunities , the comedic part of the movie is over , and it turns into a cheap and maudlin disease movie .
we learn that max's condition is terminal , and he will soon die .
to be fair , the movie does contain a few good scenes - all of which you can see in the trailers .
let's hope billy gets himself a pair of reading glasses before he signs up for another movie .
my giant runs too long even at just 1 : 37 .
it is rated pg for violence and profanity and would be acceptable for kids around ten and up .
my son jeffrey and his friend matthew , both 9 , gave the movie a single star and had nothing good to say about it .
matthew pointed out that it " is not as good as it could have been or should have been . "
( amen . )
he went on to comment that he did not like the way the movie changed completely in the middle .
jeffrey complained particularly about how gross the movie was .
| neg | Negative |
hav plenty , as we are told in the beginning and reminded during the film , is a true story .
life itself is a series of true stories , but most are not movie material .
as scripted , directed , and acted by cinematic newcomer christopher scott cherot , hav plenty limps along at best .
its dialog is so stilted - " you know what they say , 'no women ; no cry . ' "
- that the actors are content to read the screenplay rather than invest much energy in trying to act it .
in the story , lee plenty ( cherot ) is a 28-year-old author and teaching assistant .
the movie , which happens mainly over the new year's holiday , consists of a series of incidents in which various single and married women try to kiss lee or take him to bed .
since he consistently refuses , caroline gooden ( tammi katherine jones ) figures that he must be gay .
eventually he and havilland " hav " savage ( chenoa maxwell ) get together , proving that he wasn't gay after all , just picky .
sexy women can sit on his lap and ask him to go to bed with them , but he will not even kiss them .
he's a man who knows his mind , which he frequently shares directly with the audience in a series of trite and overly cute monologues .
filled with wealthy african-americans , the story is closest in tone to love jones , which was better .
hav plenty's story doesn't go anywhere .
at the end it subjects us to lee plenty's new film , which is a movie of the movie we've just seen , but with even worse acting .
" remember folks that , as outrageous as this all seems , this is a true story . "
hav tells the camera , but the problem is that it's not outrageous at all or even the least bit interesting .
hav plenty isn't so much a bad film as it is a total waste of the audience's time .
hav plenty runs 1 : 32 .
it is rated r for profanity and would be fine for most teenagers .
| neg | Negative |
it's wednesday , march 27 , and a murder investigation is underway in charlotte , south carolina .
the crime : a young prostitute , elizabeth ( renee zellweger ) , has been brutally slain .
one half of her severed body was found in a bag at the train station .
the other half was discovered in a trunk at the harbor authority , miles away .
the police duo of braxton ( chris penn ) and kennesaw ( michael rooker ) are strapped for leads .
at the moment , they have only one possible suspect : wayland ( tim roth ) , a wealthy , unemployed genius who graduated summa cum laude from princeton and appears to be the least likely character to commit such a heinous act .
that's the premise for deceiver , a new thriller from the pate brothers , jonas and josh , who made their mark on the film world two years ago at sundance with the movie the grave .
deceiver plays out like a mind game between the intellectually superior wayland and the two not- so-bright cops ( captions early in the proceedings let us know that wayland's iq is 151 ; by contrast , kennesaw's is 122 and braxton's is 102 ) .
the setting is a police interrogation room where a lie detector test is about to be administered .
over three days , as wayland returns to answer more questions , the drama and tension among these three characters gradually escalates until , inevitably , it boils over .
other plot elements are thrown in for good measure .
wayland suffers from a peculiar kind of epilepsy that can , in stressful situations , render him virtually catatonic or extremely violent .
braxton , a compulsive gambler , is deep in debt to a local syndicate .
and kennesaw is haunted by a dark , abusive side that delights in terrorizing women , especially his wife ( rosanna arquette ) , whom he suspects of being unfaithful .
the foibles and failings of these three are brought into the open as the mystery around elizabeth's death deepens and it becomes unclear who has the upper hand : the suspect or his questioners .
deceiver , which mostly transpires in a dimly-lit room and involves a lot of smart dialogue , has the feel of a david mamet play : edgy , claustrophobic , and tense .
the atmosphere is explosive , and some of pivotal moments of confrontation are riveting .
deceiver has the power to grab an audience .
unfortunately , in the end , it succumbs to the need to throw in one last , unexpected twist , and this is its undoing .
for , while this surprise will certainly shock most viewers , it also stretches our credulity too much , and raises more questions than it answers .
it's only an effective wrap-up if you don't think too carefully about its full implications .
of course , the film as a whole plays fast and loose with reality and logic .
police procedure is totally ignored and it's almost impossible to accept that any criminal investigation would or could proceed in this manner .
but the real focus in deceiver is on character interaction , not plot details .
deceiver only occasionally gets out of the police station , and those instances occur primarily during flashbacks featuring the prostitute .
the pates employ a number of interesting techniques to present vignettes from elizabeth's final days and hours .
the most intriguing of these is to use an unreliable narrator while underlining the discrepancies in his voice-over by visually showing what really happened .
moments like this are too effective to be dismissed as gimmicks .
the movie , obviously fashioned in the manner of classic film noir , drips atmosphere .
there are some fascinating stylistic touches ; for example , although the setting is contemporary , all of the telephones are old-fashioned , rotary models .
cinematographer bill butler is given an opportunity to use unconventional camera work to liven up deceiver's look .
some of the things he tries ( mostly those that involve the contrast between light and shadow ) work exceptionally well , while others ( like any of several lazy susan shots ) seem more like unnecessary visual tricks .
as wayland , tim roth gives the film's top performance , despite occasionally treading the tightrope between acting and overacting .
roth makes us believe that wayland is both as brilliant and as troubled as he's supposed to be .
the other two leads , chris penn and michael rooker , aren't as effective .
both play their characters like familiar types .
penn's performance is uninspired ; rooker's lacks subtlety .
some of the best work is turned in by the supporting actors .
renee zellweger , in a role that's miles away from her star-making turn in jerry maguire , brings a note of vulnerability and humanity to a part that could easily have become a caricature .
rosanna arquette is solid as kennesaw's wife , and michael parks delivers several wonderful scenes as a psychiatrist who's entrusted with evaluating wayland's condition .
one of the best things about deceiver is that it never talks down to the audience .
plot points aren't hammered home , and , although the ending has its weaknesses , everything isn't spelled out in bold letters .
the pates give audience members credit for having brains , which is an increasingly rare characteristic for film makers .
occasionally gripping and never uninteresting , deceiver is a fine noir effort .
| pos | Negative |
devotees of robert a . heinlein , be forewarned : paul verhoeven's starship troopers is less an adaptation of heinlein's novel than it is a literary satire .
the author's jingo-all-the-way militarism and his tendency to create plastic characters with plastic conflicts had me expecting a soulless , faceless parade of carnage from the film version .
and i suppose that's exactly what verhoeven delivers , with sometimes hilarious results .
heinlein's basic motifs are so faithfully rendered that their flaws become a source of amusement , while their strengths become the stuff of high-energy entertainment .
outlining the plot of starship troopers is a fairly silly endeavor , since it's basically a big bug hunt . . . aliens in broad daylight .
sometime in the future , humanity is threatened by giant , malevolent insects which have evolved into twenty-foot-tall action figures ( arachnids with super-impaling spikes , beetles that spew forth lava , dragonflies with guillotine legs ) .
among those who sign on to save the earth are a group of high school classmates from buenos aires : conflicted rich kid johnny rico ( casper van dien ) ; his math whiz girlfriend carmen ( denise richards ) ; dizzy ( dina meyer ) , who secretly carries a torch for johnny ; and carl ( neil patrick " doogie howser " harris ) , who not-so-secretly carries a torch for dizzy , and also has a talent for speaking telepathically to ferrets .
while carmen heads for flight school and carl joins military intelligence , johnny and dizzy become mobile infantry , their various battles intertwining with romantic sub-plots out of a third season episode from " beverly hills 90210 . "
so if starship troopers is another movie where one-dimensional characters wade through trite situations on their way to killing a bunch of aliens , what makes it any better than , say , independence day , a movie where one-dimensional characters waded through trite situations on their way to killing a bunch of slightly different aliens ?
for one thing , you sense that the film-makers are aware of the pulp nonsense they have as source material .
the very absence of major stars in the cast feels thematically appropriate , not just fiscally prudent .
if starship troopers had been turned into a tv-movie , aaron spelling would have produced it .
it's a story which requires emoting , not acting ; it's a prime time soap opera with big guns , played for all the dopey melodrama it's worth .
the no-name cast also plays into verhoeven's treatment of heinlein's most controversial conceit .
in this society , we learn , one can only be a full citizen after completing some sort of federal service , military for most .
verhoeven pays the notion plenty of lip service , then proceeds to skewer it with brilliant mock recruitment ads ( named after the world war ii-era " why we fight " series ) in which youngsters are indoctrinated into the joys of firearms , or the pleasures of stomping cockroaches .
these characters really are just " fresh meat for the grinder , " as one character puts it , which makes their lack of familiarity all the more fitting .
it's not that starship troopers is anti-military , because it never treats the true horror of war as anything but a great big , violent video game .
in fact , the characters are living the propaganda ( particularly johnny , who receives so many field promotions he may not remember his own rank by the time the film ends ) .
verhoeven is actually having it both ways -- he's making fun of gung-ho boosterism even as he fires his fresh-faced recruits into battle on a gung-ho booster rocket of visual effects .
if that makes starship troopers hypocritical , at least it's enthusiastically staged hypocrisy .
there may not be a person worth caring about in the whole film , but it moves like nobody's business .
verhoeven stages some thrilling action sequences , sending swarms of bugs after the anonymous grunts then having various body parts strewn about the screen like landscaping .
it is that rare special effects blockbuster which demonstrates a sense of pacing to match its budget ; i was caught up in the action enough of the time that i wasn't perpetually groaning over the absence of real human beings .
i wish i could find it in myself to work up more outrage over the callous way humans are dispatched in starship troopers , but it didn't work out that way .
that would be punishing verhoeven for getting to the heart of his material .
| pos | Negative |
this independent film written and directed by eric bross has the look and feel of all those other troubled blue-collar youth films that have inundated the market in recent times .
it is hard to tell what is independent about this film ; it might as well have been made in hollywood or on a home videocam .
it is the debut film for the director , who tells his personal story about italians growing up with heavy new jersey accents and remaining tight with each other as they grow into young adults , a tale which could have been rewarding to see in the 1950s , where the mind-set of all the characters depicted is grounded , but to see it in the 1990s is a different story : it is old news .
the love story between the simple girl waiting to get married and her luckless boyfriend turning nasty on her doesn't mean much , since their relationship remained undeveloped .
the introduction of the wise-guy angle and the loyality among buddies bit , are not moving enough emotional experiences or intelligent enough dramatics to elevate this film above its limited story line despite the tour-de-force performance by the star of the film , adrien brody as ray .
ray is the only son of a low-level mobster once arrested for running an illegal casino operation out of his bloomfield , new jersey , suburban basement .
ray sr . ( vincent ) is now trying to make a go of it by running a small scale home-repair business .
his son lives with him and works unhappily as a shoe salesman , dreaming of getting rich quickly so he can open a business and marry his long-time waitress girlfriend joanne ( sybil ) .
the title of this film refers to the shoe size of paul newman-10b , which really has nothing to do with explaining anything about the film . you
should be aware that there are a lot of things about this film that don't make sense : its constant brainless chatter between the buddies , their uneventful growing pains , and the despair of their lives , make it very difficult to feel any empathy for them .
desperate to make his dream come through , ray goes to a loanshark , humorously and menacingly played by james e . moriarty , and borrows 10 grand to bet on a " sure thing " at freehold raceway .
the horse loses and now ray has big problems , as the loanshark comes after him with his muscle to get his dough .
there is nothing i have seen so far to like about ray .
he is undependable , mean-spirited , and stupid .
so when his best friend mike ( gallagher ) , the narrator of the film , gets a chance to sleep with his girlfriend--who cares ?
the director must be kidding himself if he thinks we do .
as for ray's gambling debt and his dilemma of how to pay it off , the story is too predictable for anything other than what you would expect to happen .
his buddies , the college student mike and the dependable butchie ( gillan ) , and his old man , who he has this love/hate relationship with , rally to his aid .
and the film ends on an obligatory artistic note of ambiguity , that seems to be the way it is for all those wannabe artistic films , as ray is off to florida all by his lonesome self to try to put his life together .
there was just no energy or spark or anything relevant in this superficial film to keep it interesting , though adrien brody showed signs that he could be a future star .
because of his intensity and looks , he reminds me of sean penn .
| neg | Negative |
there's more to a quilt than fabric and thread--each patchwork design has its own unique story ( or stories ) to tell .
in how to make an american quilt , the first hollywood release from australian director jocelyn moorhouse ( proof ) , we come to understand how the tales of the seven makers imbue their creation with passion and vitality .
all the sorrows , joys , longings , sufferings , and loves of these women are sewn into their quilt and , as their bittersweet memories are given expression , one young woman applies these lessons of the past to her own uncertain future .
motion pictures are filled with male bonding rituals ; how to make an american quilt presents a distinctly feminine alternative .
the " quilting bee " consists of seven members : sisters gladys ( ann bancroft ) and hy ( ellen burstyn ) ; sophia ( lois smith ) , a woman known for frightening children ; emma ( jean simmons ) , the timid wife of a perpetually unfaithful man ; constance ( kate nelligan ) , who has been having an affair with emma's husband ; anna ( maya angelou ) , the leader of the group ; and marianna ( alfre woodard ) , anna's daughter .
the project they're busy with is the wedding quilt for hy's granddaughter , finn ( winona ryder ) , who has just become engaged .
she's spending the summer with hy and gladys , and away from her fiance , to decide whether a lifelong commitment is really what she wants , and whether it's better to marry a friend or a lover .
one of the greatest pleasures of how to make an american quilt comes from watching an array of fine performances by an impressive ensemble cast .
from winona ryder , ann bancroft , ellen burstyn , and maya angelou to minor players like rip torn , claire danes , and kate capshaw , this film is overflowing with realized talent .
the performances are good enough , in fact , to cover up many of the script's weaknesses .
how to make an american quilt is basically an unremarkable , if affecting , tale of love across the generations--a sort of truncated american version of the joy luck club , with a dash of fried green tomatoes added .
there are probably too many characters .
so , instead of really getting to know a few of them , we are presented with quick glimpses into a single defining event in each of their lives .
we learn about the root of the smoldering resentment between gladys and hy , and are told the reasons why emma stays with her husband and sophia is so irascible .
there are other episodes as well : the love of anna's life , marianna's soul mate , and a look at the reasons why constance entered into an affair with her friend's husband .
the sum total of these tales is meant to provide the framework for finn's story : whether to go forward with her marriage or dally with a hunky stranger .
there is no emotional epiphany in how to make an american quilt .
the stories are all well-told , but it's difficult to really connect with the characters--their moments pass so quickly .
while we certainly feel something for each of the eight principals , our emotional investment is tenuous .
there isn't enough depth to pull the viewer in all the way , and many of the personalities and relationships feel half- formed , like a quilt with patches missing .
to put it bluntly , while i enjoyed watching this film , it didn't " do much " for me .
on the whole , how to make an american quilt is a nicely-understated drama that has a lot to say about love , passion , and monogamy in relationships .
finn's segment is by far the most compelling , because she's the focal point : her actions are shaped by everyone else's experiences .
the other patches of this american quilt are successful only to varying degrees .
if there's a disappointment here , it's that the script doesn't have more resonance , but the privilege of seeing such a fine cast in top form allows a viewer to enjoy this picture even if the story is somewhat conventional .
| pos | Positive |
the characters in jonathan lynn's " the whole nine yards , " yet another in an endless recent string of mob comedies ( 1999's " analyze this " and " mickey blue eyes , " 2000's " gun shy " ) , are rarely ever written as real people , but merely as one-dimensional caricatures .
when an added layer to one of their personalities is revealed , it is not to service the character development , or to naturally offer up instinctive characterizations , but to accommodate the convoluted plot .
in a lightweight comedy , you might say , it is not required to have perfectly realized figures , just as long as they get the job done .
unfortunately , for a comedy to work , it has to at least succeed at being funny , and if there was a laugh-o-meter available , i'd guess that it briefly ascended around 2 . 5% of the time for me .
suffice to say , the comedy in " the whole nine yards " works about as well as the broken-down lawnmower in my backyard , and when a giggle surprisingly arises every twenty to thirty minutes , it is by sheer luck .
nicholas " oz " oseransky ( matthew perry ) is an amateur dentist living in the quiet suburbs of quebec .
trapped in a hateful marriage with the conniving sophie ( rosanna arquette , delightfully hamming it up with a clearly artificial french-canadian accent ) , one day oz sees that someone is moving into the house next-door .
walking over to greet him , he is horrified to discover it is jimmy " the tulip " tudeski ( bruce willis ) , a former contract killer for the mafia who has just been released from prison .
once getting to know him and becoming his friend , oz is more comfortable with his identity , but for sophie , it means a possible hitman to do away with oz .
in her scheme , sophie sends oz to chicago to cash in by informing his old mob boss ( kevin pollak ) about jimmy's whereabouts , but in the process , he falls in love with jimmy's wife , cynthia ( natasha henstridge ) , who is being held hostage .
upon return to quebec , and with one contrivance after the next , oz's dental assistant , jill ( amanda peet ) , is overjoyed to discover that he lives beside " the tulip , " and forces him to set up a meeting , since jill's dream in life turns out being a contract killer herself .
have you got all that ?
because there is more .
much , much more .
and this is a movie that , without credits , is little over 90 minutes and feels only like an hour .
" the whole nine yards " is an ultimately unsatisfying and empty-headed excursion into well-worn terrain already set by far superior pictures .
how the cast , most of which are respectable actors , got caught up in such a cliched , deficient film remains a mystery , unless they thought it might aspire to match the congenial screwball zaniness of director lynn's 1985 comedy classic , " clue : the movie . "
going into the theater , preliminary comparisons between the two movies were unavoidable , but by the twenty-minute mark , when i had chuckled once and laughed nary a single time , it was clear this production was in serious trouble .
since the entire running time depends on the mechanisms of the plot , and the screenplay , inauspiciously written by mitchell kapner , collapses with every failing " comedy " bit , the film is an inevitable dead zone in the way of substance and , frequently , entertainment value .
" the whole nine yards " is neither facetious nor , aside from the subplot about jill's shocking eagerness to become a professional hitwoman , inventive , and more often than not , just lies there , the film spinning drearily around and around in the projector , but never igniting any sort of spark .
a few select actors do what they can with the material , while others make no impact at all .
on the mediocre side are actually those playing the two central characters : matthew perry and bruce willis .
perry , innocuously enjoyable on tv's " friends , " plays the same exact sitcom-style character in all of his movies ( from 1997's " fools rush in " to 1999's " three to tango " ) , and it has become a crushing bore .
meanwhile , willis makes next to no impression , and because of the limited guise of his jimmy " the tulip " tudeski , oftentimes disappears into the background .
their three female counterparts fare noticeably better .
best of all is natasha henstridge , far more radiant than in the exploitative " species " movies , who adds unanticipated depth and emotion to cynthia .
henstridge has the talent , for sure , to break out of these countless throwaway roles , but first she must fire her agent .
amanda peet has a lot of fun as the quirkily straightforward and giddy jill , and seems to know more about the art of comedic payoff than even perry who , thus far , has strived on a career based solely on comedy .
it is too bad , then , that peet is unnecessarily asked to disrobe in a climactic scene , with the obvious sole purpose being to show off her breasts .
finally , rosanna arquette is awful as sophie , but something tells me that was her purpose , and her clear overacting only aids in brightening up her limited screen time .
also popping up is michael clarke duncan , fresh off an oscar nomination for his role in " the green mile , " as jimmy's largely built friend and fellow killer , frankie figs .
when " the whole nine yards " eventually sputters to its underwhelming conclusion , one is left pondering how such a film ever got greenlit .
a great deal of movies of this type have been made in the past , and this one is nothing but a duplication of better films , so what was the point ?
without a passable screenplay or any notable technical accomplishments , " the whole nine yards " rests solely on the presumed charm of the cast , and half of the actors are not charming at all .
now , what does that tell you ?
| neg | Negative |
14 years ago , national lampoon introduced us to a new family - the griswolds .
in 1983 , the griswolds embarked on a cross-country journey with the destination of wally world , a world-renowned theme park in california .
we laughed our heads off as we shared the wild and crazy mishaps the family endured .
two years later , we watched again as they went to europe , and four years after that , we shared christmas with them .
now , eight more years have passed , and the laughs have done more than die .
they've been cremated .
vegas vacation brings back chevy chase as clark griswold , the good intentioned but ill-fated father of two .
the premise is basically the same .
clark has a wonderful idea to take his family on a bonding vacation , this time to las vegas .
his wife ellen ( beverly d'angelo ) and teenage kids rusty and audrey ( always played by different actors - this time around , by ethan embry and marisol nichols , respectively ) join him and they soon find themselves in sin city where casinos will make the backdrop for ninety minutes of slapstick .
of course a " vacation " movie wouldn't be complete without good ole eddie ( reprised by randy quaid ) , the misfit cousin , showing up at all the wrong times .
there isn't too much of a plot here when it comes right down to it .
it's really just a skit movie .
there are a couple of ways to define a skit movie , which is not a real term as far as i know .
the first would be a movie that basically has one running gag for two hours , therefore coming off like a two hour skit .
the second would be a movie that seems comprised of about twenty shorter skits , each lasting about five minutes .
vegas vacation comes off like the first .
a good example of the latter would be last year's black sheep .
the problem with this format is that it becomes old fast , and it doesn't really fit into a movie mold .
in these cases , a " plot " , which is generally very thin , is used either as a shameless filler between scenes or to simply add convenience to the gags ( i . e .
have a good vegas joke , make a vegas movie ) .
such is the case with this movie's mini-plots .
clark gets gambling fever and begins spending all of the griswold's money , ellen is on the verge of an affair with wayne newton ( ! ) , rusty has a fake id and is using it to his gambling advantage , and audrey is desperate for fun and winds up joining her cousin vickie ( shae d'lyn ) as an exotic dancer .
the simple fact is : this movie isn't funny .
at first , i did find myself chuckling heartily at a couple of little jokes , but when the movie got rolling , my interest suddenly stopped .
chase plays clark griswold really well .
he made the character and he is the character .
d'angelo , to be quite honest , never was too impressive as ellen , and this movie doesn't show any signs of redemption .
as for the two new griswold kids , the word " blah " comes to mind .
the " vacation " series seems out to prove that anybody can play these two characters , the simple reason being that there is nothing to them .
they're so generic , you'll expect the credits to read " girl #1 as audrey griswold " .
vegas vacation differs from the first three in the series by more than just laugh factor .
yes , it's true that vegas vacation isn't even close to being close to being as funny as the others , which were actually pretty fun in their own doofy ways , but there are a couple of other things that set this one negatively apart .
first off , why did they leave off the national lampoon's heading on the title ?
i couldn't find any reasons why , but maybe the fact is even national lampoon didn't want to be associated with such a lame film .
that's saying a lot , especially when you look at what else the company has proudly presented : loaded weapon 1 , pcu , etc . if they expected this to be another hit , you would assume they'd be proud to tack on the notorious header , but for reasons only we can guess at , like the movie sucking , they didn't .
there is another difference here that makes an obvious impact .
the first three films in the " vacation " series were written by john hughes , a talented writer who is behind several popular films of the 80's including mr .
mom , sixteen candles , the breakfast club , weird science , pretty in pink , ferris bueller's day off , planes , trains , and automobiles , and uncle buck .
wowzers !
what a r ? sum ? !
looking at the names , you'd think this guy wrote everything that now stands as a movie icon for the 1980's .
well that's not all .
this guy also brought us 90's hits including the home alone series , the remake of 101 dalmatians , dennis the menace , and the current flubber .
vegas vacation , however , didn't have john hughes behind it , and the loss is very obvious .
this time around , the script is in the hands of elisa bell , whose only credits thus far include four made-for-tv movies .
vegas vacation plays very much like one , and it would actually work much better as a made-for-tv sequel .
if this sounds like a wild idea , it's not .
revenge of the nerds third and fourth installments were both television movies , and they seemed like it .
vegas vacation would fit in well on the fox network as a 2 : 00 a . m .
sunday morning movie , but as a silver screen major motion picture , it's quite out of place .
stephen kessler's jejune direction doesn't help things either .
he only makes the film even more tv-movie-ish .
each consecutive " vacation " movie has suffered a drop in directing power .
we started the series off with harold ramis , who also directed caddyshack and groundhog day as well as co-writing ghostbusters .
not too bad .
then we had national lampoon's european vacation being directed by amy heckerling , who would go on to direct the hits look who's talking and clueless , as well as having already directed the infamous fast times at ridgemont high .
lastly we had national lampoon's christmas vacation , directed by jeremiah s . chechik , who went on to direct the charming benny & joon .
kessler , so far , has one title under his belt , the short film birch street gym , which received an oscar nomination in 1992 .
granted that this was his first attempt at a feature length film , we can allow for some amateurish quality , but instead we get a movie straight from the text book - boring , bland , and deeply unoriginal .
if you loved the " vacation " movies , and i know * some * of us did , there still isn't anything here worth seeing .
if you loved them , don't ruin your good impressions of the series by indulging in this tragic example of cinema ala carte .
if you never did like the series , why the need to confirm why ?
| neg | Negative |
as you should know , this summer has been less than memorable .
with a total of 4 decent films , it's not a surprise that these big budget failures keep appearing .
with that said , you can pretty much predict what my opinion on " the 13th warrior " will be .
the film is based on the michael crichton " eaters of the dead " , in which ahmed ibn fahdlan is banished from his country for looking at a wife of a king .
after tarveling for many months , he comes across a gang of norsemen , who are forced to pick 13 men to protect a town from mythical monsters who travel in the fog .
so , they start picking men , and are left without 1 , thus ahmed is choosen .
so far it sounds interesting right ?
not when all of this takes place in 15 minutes .
after that , they basically run around killing .
that alone shows how much a script is needed for a film , because once your story is introduced , you have the rest of the film to start developing it .
obviously that's not the case here .
even if you are going into the film expecting an action packed adventure , you will be disappointed .
since all the action takes place in fog , it is constantly hard to see a scene clearly due to those circumstances , and to poor camera work .
can't the camera men sit still ?
i'd like to actually watch a film in focus , but again , they failed to deliver that as well .
the film moves on and on until the point , where you can care less about anything but the popcorn you're eating .
with corny dialogue , that the characters laugh at for some odd reason , a script that goes nowhere , dull action sequences , a predictable ending , and worst of all weak characters , there's basically nothing to like here , except for maybe the set designs .
that's the only thing that honestly caught my interest .
when i heard that john mctiernan , the director , wanted his name kept out of the project , that made me wonder why ?
well now i know .
crichton's greed forced mctiernan to edit his finished product , which led to a big arguement .
what's there to argue about anyway ?
the film couldn't be saved , no matter how much they spent or casted .
seeing films like the haunting and big daddy making money , i wouldn't be surprised to see " the 13th warrior " become a hit .
please do me a favor and save your money at all costs , or else you will be lost in the fog , like the film itself .
| neg | Negative |
an indian runner was more than a courier .
he * became * the message he was carrying .
what danger is a bear , to a message ?
i used to think sean penn was an immature , arrogant , photographer- punching , madonna-marrying , loudmouth .
but all that has changed now .
the guy has grown up .
and that's not all .
it seems that sean penn has talents both as a writer and a director , if this film is any indication .
one might imagine a movie with plenty of ruthless rage and showy machismo , given penn in charge of bronson and and hopper .
but , no .
this film is about a real struggle , and the victories and defeats are not simple .
penn lets the story unfold at a pace dictated by the lives of the characters , without unnecessary rush or flash .
the focus of the story is two brothers .
david morse is the brother who has grown up in the small midwestern town in which they were raised , tending a failing farm and finally becoming a police officer .
viggo mortensen is the wild brother , whose wild behavior seems to be a reaction to some ancient pain that he can't name , much less resolve .
the film picks the story up on the day when mortensen returns from vietnam , and morse coincidentally encounters an armed youth fleeing for the state line .
it becomes clear that some kind of conflict threatens the link that the brothers once shared .
the film is unobtrusive , simple , direct , plain , and sincere .
it isn't exactly perfect , but its sincerity is well invested in the struggle of the two brothers to identify the sickness before it destroys them .
life seems to move forward a little faster than they can get a handle on their problems .
this is a good film without big budget sets , or big name stars pushed into your face .
in fact , i'm reviewing it because i suspect that it may not get much marketing .
there were perhaps 10 others at the showing i saw .
i thought the structure was clean and not oversimplified , though there are a few free-form sections which also work very well .
the obligatory 1960s music seemed a little cliche , but what are you going to do--this movie * does * take place in the 1960s after all .
in my opinion , it is worth full-price admission .
| pos | Positive |
this reviewer is ignorant of what hands were responsible for delivering the original version of the abyss in 1989 .
whether it was the meddling of studio executives , or the work of writer/director james cameron himself , the original cut of this underwater sci-fi thriller was entertaining enough but also quite seriously flawed .
the main problem was fairly simple : the film's climax was unworthy of its build-up .
someone at 20th century fox - and no doubt cameron himself - must have agreed , because in 1993 came the theatrical release of the abyss : special edition .
now available on video , it seems timely to re-evaluate what , in its newly revamped state , is now a near-masterpiece despite its borrowings from films like 2010 : odyssey two , alien and close encounters of third kind .
the plot is thus .
we meet the crew of an experimental underwater mobile oil rig designed by the hard-nosed lindsay ( mastrantonio ) and captained by her soon-to-be-divorced husband bud ( ed harris ) .
the rig and its crew are diverted from their normal duties when the navy seeks their help in investigating the mysterious sinking of a u . s . nuclear submarine .
requiring a dive part-way down a three mile deep trench , three navy divers arrive to command the operation , led by the edgy lieutenant coffey ( biehn ) .
but a series of strange sightings soon convinces at least one member of the civilian crew that whoever or whatever they're dealing with , as she memorably puts it , " aren't speaking russian " .
meanwhile on the surface a hurricane is brewing and , even worse , a series of incidents around cuba involving russians ships and an increasingly nervous u . s . navy sets off an international crisis of possible catastrophic proportions .
this crisis is mirrored in the confines of the now isolated underwater rig , with the trigger-happy and increasingly paranoid lieutenant coffey at odds with the crew about how do deal with the mysterious goings-on around them .
the human drama is often riveting , with the principal players performing with an intensity that recalls the fine ensemble acting in cameron's aliens .
the stunts , hardware , special effects and underwater cinematography are all outstanding .
and so they should be : cameron's technical credentials are well established .
but what ultimately makes the film so gripping is three intersecting plot strands : 1 ) the tension between old sparring partners lindsay and ex-hubby bud ; 2 ) the war of wills between the civilian crew and the navy divers as a series of escalating crisis' befall them ; and 3 ) the slowly unfolding revelation of what lies at the bottom of the three mile deep abyss .
the abyss : special edition is an improvement on the original film in two major respects .
one is that it further fleshes out the relationship between bud and lindsay , a relationship at times touching , at others incredibly intense and volatile .
the second improvement is the restoration of some absolutely crucial scenes towards the film's end , when the aliens demonstrate their control over water with a terrifying and extraordinary display of power to a world on the brink of nuclear war .
with the inclusion of these startling scenes , the story's climax is now given real weight .
why on earth were they left out of the original ?
this reviewer finds it utterly incomprehensible .
so then , we have 25 minutes of additional footage that's turned a decent underwater thriller into something quite magnificent .
i say " quite " because some flaws do remain .
the most grating is several moments of corny hollywood schmaltz - some new , some old - that may well have you reaching for the barf bag .
nonetheless , the abyss : special edition now stands this somewhat maligned film among james cameron's greatest achievements , alongside aliens and terminator 2 . see it and be moved , gripped and spellbound .
| pos | Positive |
the most amazing thing about paul cox's innocence is how unlike a movie it is .
i mean that as the highest compliment .
if most studios were to profile an elderly couple who rekindle a 40-year-old romance , i'd want to run and hide .
the sex scenes would be handled as a farce , producers would shed 20 years off the characters' ages ( so susan sarandon and harrison ford could star ) and true love would shine through any obstacle without explanation and consequence .
along with a charming romantic story , the australian/belgian innocence shows how an increasing sense of mortality combined with revisiting the past while being entrenched in the present can make something that seems so right seem downright questionable .
the romance gets started when former musician andreas ( charles " bud " tingwell ) , learns that his true love , claire ( julia blake ) , lives nearby .
they decide to catch up on old times , but soon find themselves in a reinvigorating affair .
complicating matters is andreas' frail health , and claire's longtime husband ( terry norris ) , who can't understand why he's suddenly become obsolete .
in my mind , the movie is less about the relationship between andreas and claire , than the feelings of everyone involved .
john , claire's husband , endlessly questions what he did wrong .
claire initially insists she's a grown-up , but admittedly behaves like a child , a prospect that thrills and disappoints her .
andreas , an agnostic , begins to question his fate , a message cox delivers in a memorable dream sequence .
cox litters the movie with flashbacks , including the repeated vision of a roaring train .
it's a reminder of andreas and claire's past love ( as young lovers , they met by train ) , but as it recurs , we get the feeling that the past and the present have clashed .
a pall is cast on the whole affair .
a master of the understated , cox strings together a series of memorable moments .
in andreas' dream sequence , amidst the roar of the train and conversations , we get the whole picture of andreas and claire's love .
we also get glimpses into john and claire's relationship .
during a silent candlelit dinner shortly afterward , claire admits to john about her indiscretion , telling more than any monologue could .
all that's heard is the scraping of forks against plates .
the characters are unlike anything i've seen -- they're people .
so many times , movies and especially television portray senior citizens as gratingly spunky .
or they're reduced to comedic buffoons .
ordinary people with a pile of emotions , claire and andreas aren't sure what the next step is .
they do want to be happy , which consists of an entirely different set of conditions than what they've known throughout their adult lives .
bravo to cox , who wrote the script , for not making john a monster , so that claire's affair is automatically justified .
norris is so effective as john that he makes andreas and claire's love difficult to accept .
we feel for him .
he's a decent man .
sure , he may have become complacent , but he never expected this , especially now .
with so much presented to the audience , it's only expected that the material gets a little drawn out and repetitive , which it does .
however , in bringing up tough questions and not offering easy answers , cox displays a skill and ? lan isn't likely to be surpassed by anyone anytime soon .
| pos | Positive |
there are certain people in the world who have some talent that very few people have , but they chose not to take advantage of this for some personal reason .
" good will hunting " is about one of those people .
the will hunting of the ( horrible ) title ( let's face it , this film would be a bitch to title ) , played by co-writer matt damon , is a mathematical genius .
he can do almost any mathematical connundrum in about the time it takes to brew a cup of irish cream cappuccino .
and he works at mit . . . as the janitor .
one day , the professor of one of the most challenging courses , proffessor lambeau ( " breaking the waves " 's stellan skarsg ? rd ) , puts a big problem on the board for his students to attempt to complete .
the next day , it's already done on the board , but no one in his class claims to have done it .
so lambeau puts another problem on the board , this time one that took he and his colleagues over two years to prove .
and , duh , it's done again .
of course , they catch the guy who did it red handed - will .
before lambeau can find will again ( he ran away when he caught him ) , will has gotten into a fight with a bunch of punks on a basketball court , and struck a police officer , so lambeau gets him out on probation with two agreements : a ) he work with him on math , and b ) he get some therapy .
after going through some therapists whom he psyches out in one way or another ( for a hypnotist , he fakes being under his spell , then launches into an impromptu performance of the 70s classic , " afternoon delight " ) .
finally , lambeau's old college roomate , sean mcguire ( robin williams ) , a psych professor , agrees to treat him , and the two begin a rocky relationship , as sean tries to get will to open up .
turns out will had a rough childhood , being abandoned , and placed in foster homes and what not .
it also turns out that will does not want to do simple mathematics all his life ; he wants a challenge .
and that is to hang out with his buds ( including the other co-writer , ben affleck ) , and do honorable jobs , like construction .
is it right to make this genius follow in the footsteps of einstein and kasinsky ?
should this guy be forced to do something he doesn't want to do ?
this appears to be one of the million questions in this film , which is jam-packed with greatness , but does not have the totally brilliant whole it should .
i'm not saying " good will hunting " is a bad film at all .
it's a very enjoyable film with tons of great moments , and lots of great things about it .
the acting is amazing , with two oscar-nomination-worthy performances from damon and williams , who have amazing chemistry together .
we also get some great support from stellan skarsg ? rd ( great name ) , ben affleck , and from minnie driver , who plays will's love interest , skylar .
there are tons of individual moments that i adored .
i loved all the comedy in the film , especially a scene where damon proves a schmuck out of a college student who is quoting a historian to impress some chicks , his various attempts at therapy , and of course , my favorite scene in the entire film , the one where he delivers a long , exstensive rant to some nsa agents about the downside of working for them .
i liked the relationship between some of the people , like will and skylar , will and sean , sean and lambeau , and will and his friends .
there are scenes between them which are just amazing to watch .
and there are even moments in the film which are so honest in their portrayal , that i felt rightfully uncomfortable .
like the break-up scene between will and skylar , will and sean's first meeting , a bar scene between sean and lambeau , and a scene where sean tells in detail how he doesn't regret meeting his first wife , who would later suffer a slow , painful death , and leave him lonely and slightly bitter .
however , the main flaw of the film is there's too much of everything , and not enough of it either .
the film tries for deeper relations between the characters , but they're sometimes either overwritten or underwritten .
take for example the relationship between sean and will : the film gets an interesting father/son as well as doctor/patient relationship going with out any problems , but when it tries to show them as equals , it falls on its face .
we hear how they went to the same town , and there are even scenes where the film shows how hypocritical both of them are at times .
but this never takes off like the other parts of their relationship do .
also , will's relationship with his best friend , chuckie ( affleck ) , has a nice climax , but not enough rising action .
we see them joking around , but when chuckie arrives at a decision between the two of them , it seems more like a superficial reasoning than a more selected one .
their relationship never goes beyond " just best friends , " and his decision just seems to be a generalization of any two best friends instead of something more . . . human .
maybe it was just me .
and it also goes for a parallelism with the relationship between sean and lambeau , but that , again , is underwritten .
and , of course , as in most films like this , the girl/boy relationship is pretty underwritten .
we never understand what they see in each other , so when skylar confesses that she loves him , it seems more like it's there for plot details that anything else .
minnie driver is interesting , though , and breathes life into her character .
the writing is a bit at fault here , but what makes all this worthwhile is the little moments in the film where it acheives true awesomeness .
sure , it feels overstuffed , but it's extremely enjoyable .
the dialogue that affleck and damon have written is amazingly fresh , and seems extremely human .
i think that they should get a nomination for their script chiefly because of the dialogue , which is amazing .
while this is probably director gus van sant's most conservative film ( you'd hardly know it's the same director of " to die for , " the only van sant film i've seen , really ) , it's still a pretty remarkable film , albeit a tad overrated ( what's this " best picture " deal ? ) .
and if a film puts a smile on my face despite posessing a lot of flaws , i have no problem with reccomending it to anyone .
| pos | Negative |
it is hard to imagine that a movie which includes abortion and incest as prominent plot devices could be so sensitive , so delicate , so insightful and yes , even so enjoyable .
somehow , the cider house rules manages to keep an even keel in the face of the harsh subject matter and allows a substantial amount of heart to shine through .
set in the 1940's , the film tells the story of a unique young man named homer wells ( tobey maguire , ride with the devil ) .
an orphan , twice rejected as an infant by possible adoptive parents , he grows up in the care and under the tutelage of dr . wilbur larch ( michael caine , little voice ) , father figure to the orphans of st . cloud , obstetrician or abortionist to the unhappily pregnant women who come there seeking his help .
figuring that as long as homer was going to stay at the orphanage , he might as well be of use , dr . larch begins teaching him all he knows about obstetrics .
soon homer is delivering babies like a professional .
he refuses to perform abortions , instead wondering why the couples just didn't behave more responsibly .
larch , too old and experienced to have such youthful ideals , marvels that homer " continues to have such high expectations of people . "
such is the result of an insulated upbringing .
though skilled in certain medical procedures , homer remains woefully naive and ignorant about most everything else .
he finally figures that in order to find his place in the world , he must go out into it .
befriending a young couple who had come to see dr . larch , he hitches a ride with them and parlays that into landing a job as an apple picker with a group of black migrant workers at the orchard where they lived .
thus , homer begins his worldly instruction , with new friend candy kendall ( charlize theron , the astronaut's wife ) a willing tutor .
tobey maguire is well cast yet again as an inherently good man who is seeking answers to life's questions . . .
many of which he was unaware needed to be asked .
he demonstrates a quiet strength and thoughtful curiosity that is both warm and appealing .
michael caine is , in a word , brilliant as the caring caretaker of these orphans , many of whom he helped to bring into the world .
calling them " princes of maine , kings of new england " in his ritualistic goodnight , mr . caine manages to communicate the love and commitment larch has towards these children without becoming maudlin or saccharine .
delroy lindo ( a life less ordinary ) has many powerful moments as mr . rose , the strong and charismatic leader of the apple pickers whom homer joins .
director lasse hallstrom ( what's eating gilbert grape ? ) and screenwriter/novelist john irving ( the world according to garp ) , who adapted his own work for this movie deserve much of the credit for the balanced approach to the sensitive subject matter .
regardless of one's personal stand on the divisive matter of abortion , it is hard to imagine anyone becoming offended by the evenhanded treatment used by these filmmakers .
the title is a reference to a list of rules posted in the quarters of the illiterate apple pickers .
figuring the rules didn't apply to them since they didn't have a hand in writing them , they decide to ignore the list and make up their own rules as they go along .
dr . larch , in his own way , acts similarly .
there is a danger in that line of reasoning .
god has also given us a set of rules .
unlike the list posted in the cider house , god's rules , if followed , promise us benefits beyond our imagination .
and yet , many continue to ignore his " rules " preferring to make up their own as they go through life .
" trust in the lord with all thine heart ; and lean not unto thine own understanding . "
proverbs 3 : 5 [kjv]
just as a builder follows a designer's blueprint or a conductor follows a composer's score , why shouldn't we follow the rules of life given to us by life's architect for our own blessing ?
| pos | Positive |
when i left the theater after seeing david lynch's " lost highway , " i remarked to a fellow movie-goer , " i feel like someone just sucked my brains out through my nose and put them back in through my ears . "
in his first feature film in five years , lynch delivers a film second only to his debut picture " eraserhead " on the weirdness scale .
you won't " know " what happened when it's over , though there are certainly enough clues with which to make some reasonable guesses .
it is difficult to describe the plot of this film , because it depends partly on how you interpret it .
i can , however , describe what we see on the screen : l . a . jazz saxophonist fred madison ( bill pullman ) and his wife renee ( patricia arquette ) , whom he clearly suspects of infidelity , receive a series of videotapes apparently filmed inside their house while they were asleep .
they are , naturally enough , more than a little frightened and confused , and it doesn't help matters any when " mystery man " ( robert blake ) approaches fred at a party and proceeds to call himself on the telephone at the madisons' house in a scene that is at once hilarious and unnerving .
the next morning , fred finds another videotape which , to his ( and our ) surprise , shows him brutally murdering renee in their bedroom .
he is convicted of her murder and sent to death row , where he inexplicably disappears one night and is replaced by a young mechanic named pete dayton ( balthazar getty ) .
the perplexed prison officials release dayton , whose life begins to intersect with fred in a number of ways - most notably his affair with alice wakefield ( arquette again ) , a blonde who is otherwise renee's spitting image , and another encounter with the mystery man .
i would be giving away a little too much to reveal any more , but suffice it to say that lynch doesn't offer any neat wrap ? ups , nor does he put a lid on the metaphysical confusion : the cinematic demons of " lost highway " are out in full force from beginning to end .
this description might make " lost highway " sound like a giddy exercise in haywire surrealism , but in fact , while there are traces of lynch's weird sense of humor , this film is anything but giddy most of the time .
on the contrary , lost highway is a dark and perplexing mystery that takes lynch's previous excursions into murder and intrigue one step farther .
the film does not revolve around a character investigating a mystery ; rather , the character * is * the mystery .
there are recurring and at times deeply disturbing images of suspicion , distrust , and infidelity thoughout the film that seem to indicate a deluded , fractured psyche at the root of all the bizarre goings-on here .
we , the audience , are left to puzzle out whose psyche it is that is driving this ( probably fred's , in my opinion ) and what , in that case , the other characters and events are meant to represent .
all of this proceeds , appropriately , in lynch's typically slow-paced , idiosyncratic style .
as is often the case , lynch relies on sound , imagery , and mood more than on dialogue and action to tell his story , and in " lost highway " it works perfectly .
there are scenes when the camera lingers on fred's blank expression as he drifts uncomfortably down a hallway , or on his pained face in his prison cell while the haunting strains of this mortal coil's " song to the siren " can be heard faintly in the background ; nothing is technically " happening " in these scenes , yet they present a vivid picture of a man losing his grip just as effective as , if not more so than , the hysterical screaming found in most movie presentations of insanity .
lynch's direction and director of photography pete deming's darkly lit cinematography serve to create a nearly suffocating atmosphere of tension and fear that are exactly what is needed for this story .
well , most of the time , anyway - i have to admit that i was a bit bored at times during the section of the film with pete dayton as the protgaonist , which is less inherently interesting and mostly keeps the viewer's attention because of its tie-ins to the original mystery .
the main characters in this " reality " - dayton ( a well-meaning but none too intelligent 24-year-old ) , a sleazy gangster ( who for some reason has two names but otherwise is pretty much a stock character ) , and his porn-star girlfriend ( the blond arquette ) - are nothing you couldn't find in any of the two dozen " pulp fiction " wannabes ; fortunately , the reappearance of the mystery man as well as some other typically lynchian elements , such as the strained , awkward conversations between pete and his parents , help to preserve the film's spooky , unnerving tone during this stretch .
lynch's typically graphic and disturbing portrayals of fringe sexuality , while relevant to the themes of jealousy and adultery , are also somewhat overdone here .
it's not exactly exploitative - like almost everything else in this film , the sex is thoroughly weird and creepy and is unlikely to provide any cheap lurid thrills - as much as it is unnecessary and frankly kind of dumb by the seventh or eighth time arquette takes her clothes off .
that said , these minor flaws don't prevent " lost highway " from attaining its place as one of the darkest , most unsettling films to hit the screens in recent years .
it is a one-way ride down the lost highway of a disturbed mind , and as such it is gripping , intense , and brilliantly effective .
| pos | Negative |
the long and illustrious career of robin williams , which has included both forgettable turns like mrs .
doubtfire and flubber , was punctuated with the actor's first academy award in 1998 for his role in good will hunting .
it was his first truly dramatic role since 1989's dead poets society , and critical remarks were unanimously positive .
his next role , that of a deceased pediatrician in what dreams may come , was unfortunately lackluster .
and so , after a six-year stint as a comedic actor , the proof on whether or not williams can cut it in the dramatic league has come down to patch adams .
williams is the title character , hunter " patch " adams , sporting scruffy facial hair that falls between the clean-shavenness of dreams and the grotesque hairiness of will hunting .
we're introduced to patch as he commits himself to a mental institution because of his suicidal tendancies .
it's at the institution , however , that he discovers a latent talent for relating to people .
he removes himself from the institution and enrolls at the university of virginia's medical college , where he finds that medical doctrine is a calculating , impersonal trade .
his attempts to inject humanity into the profession result in several bouts with expulsion , and the movie climaxes with patch's appearance before the state medical board .
the characters are well-defined in an oscar-worthy sense .
although the script does not perform well as a narrative -- there's little story to be told outside of patch's skit-length experiences -- the script does go a long way toward building the relationships of characters .
at medical school , patch meets up with truman schiff ( daniel london ) , an outsider like himself who relishes patch's zest for humanity .
the two instantly become the best of friends , and it's easy to see why .
monica potter plays patch's love interest , a young woman who personifies the things that patch hates about medical school .
for some reason he's attracted to her , and although it never gets said , the audience understands from an intrinsic point of view .
the script -- based on hunter adams' own story -- works well this way .
the rest of the cast , bob gunton as the villain professor in particular , is solid .
director tom shadyac ( liar liar ) leads us in and out of patch's life in a sound , intentional manner ; combined with williams' presence on screen , the movie rarely becomes boring .
patch adams' lack of purpose is its major shortcoming , and for the first ninety minutes out of two hours , there's little feeling of continuity or the passage of time .
nevertheless , it's an emotionally moving picture , and patch adams looks to be one of the more memorable of the holiday season .
it succeeds at everything it tries , and only fails at the stuff it doesn't try in the first place .
by and large there may be another oscar nomination herein for williams , but more importantly , it's entertainment for the entire family .
| pos | Positive |
you know , i never really wondered what the tarzan films would have been like had tarzan been an old man .
while watching instinct , i couldn't help but acknowledge the way the film carelessly rehashes the well-explored themes of those earlier movies .
even beside the tarzan comparison , instinct just isn't a very good film .
it's painfully idealistic , manipulative , and silly .
i didn't hate it -- it's simply impossible for me to hate any film starring anthony hopkins ; furthermore , most of the acting is quite good .
but i can recognize instinct for what it is beyond my subjective admiration for the actors involved .
i can also recognize reasons for wanting to make instinct , and it's pretty clear that this could have been a good film with a massive script overhaul and a director less interested in imitating movies like patch adams .
things start off in the predictable way , as director jon turtletaub introduces us to our hero , theo caulder ( cuba gooding , jr . ) , an ambitious , young psychiatrist under the supervision of an experienced , old psychiatrist ( donald sutherland ) .
caulder soon finds himself involved in the case of his life , the one he thinks will make him famous .
the subject is ethan powell ( hopkins ) , an anthropologist who has been living among gorillas in africa for the past two years .
powell has been charged with the brutal murders of several men in africa , and it's now caulder's job to find out of he's mentally competent enough to stand trial .
through a series of short sessions , caulder tries to put together the complex psyche of powell .
even though it really is an old man version of tarzan , much of this central idea is rather interesting .
as i said , hopkins is captivating for every second he's on screen ; he has a way of convincing us that he's not acting , that he's actually a man who has just spent two years of his life living with a family of wild gorillas .
the character himself isn't very interesting -- he's just an anthropologist who really likes gorillas -- but hopkins makes him interesting with subtleties both in speech and action .
gooding jr . does strong work opposite hopkins , playing caulder as an intelligent and flawed individual .
the screenplay , written by gerald di pego and " suggested by " a novel by daniel quinn , gives us no background information on caulder , but that seems to be the point ( he has no time for friends because he's obsessed with his work ) .
nonetheless , these two actors are essentially the entire list of things that are good about instinct .
unfortunately , filmmaking this inept can mangle the effect of even the best acting .
turtletaub and di pego are both guilty of instinct's artistic failure , for they work together to make the dumbest , most cliche-ridden environment in which their characters are to live , and they do so by means of brainless subplots .
first , we have the prison warden subplot .
the prison warden is evil and wants to stop caulder's progress at any cost ; if this means taking caulder off the powell case , then that's fine .
there's also the prison guard subplot .
the prison guard is played by john ashton ; the prison guard seems to enjoy mercilessly beating upon the psychotics under his supervision , and he's instrumental in helping the story along to its obvious conclusion .
then there's the daughter subplot , in which maura tierney ( playing the daughter ) must look very upset a lot of the time ; after all , she is the daughter of a deranged man .
if some of this stuff sounds familiar , that's because they're all devices that have been used and reused in countless other films .
the evil doctor in patch adams is not unlike the evil warden here .
the offensive caricatures of mental patients lack the depth that the similar portrayals in one flew over the cuckoo's nest had .
ashton's evil prison guard pales in comparison to clancy brown's in the shawshank redemption .
hopkins' performance will undoubtedly remind audiences of his turn in the silence of the lambs .
and then there's the whole tarzan thing , which is more than a little bit obvious through the entire film .
perhaps what irritates me most about instinct is the half-hearted attempt at philosophical depth .
the message powell brings back from the wild is not a subtle one : he thinks that humans are " takers , " that they expand and kill and that we should all just live like gorillas .
i can sympathize with that , but only when it's in a compelling film .
this is the kind of stupid movie -- just like patch adams -- in which a big group of characters ( psychotic inmates , in this case ) rise against the evil forces oppressing them by tearing up playing cards .
what does any of this have to do with a man who has just spent two years of his life with gorillas ?
if all the subplots of instinct had been left on the cutting room floor , we would have had a thirty-minute movie far superior to the two-hour one that i watched today .
if the central idea had been developed beyond the old man tarzan premise , then we would really have had something interesting -- a movie that doesn't rely on the strength of its actors .
| neg | Negative |
in 1987 the stock market crashed , and oliver stone's wall street was released to critical acclaim and packed movie houses .
wall street lucked out in its timing ; the recent crash gave the film a resonation it might not of had , and though its kill-or-be-killed approach to business was exaggerated , that very ideology was keyed into the mind set of the quintessential reagan-era businessman .
stone constructed his film as a mythical good vs . evil tale relayed in the fast-paced milieu of the burgeoning stock exchange .
critics and audiences lauded wall street , elevating its status to that of a contemporary classic .
i'm proud to say that i will never be counted as one of them .
i found wall street to be just as axiomatic and pandering as the majority of stone's output with its thin caricatures , obvious sentiments , and a charisma barren performance by the young charlie sheen .
stone goes for broke in every scene ( the same could be said for nearly all of his works ) .
this approach tends to bury his purported message beneath a heap of good intentions .
he directs stock exchange scenes in typical hyperbolic mode with people shouting into phones as if they were in a plummeting airplane .
it's all an excuse for stone to ratchet up the emotion with false intensity , rather than explore what these situations are really like .
i have a feeling the brokers would be psychologically manipulative ( as they are presented in boiler room ) rather than laughably over the top .
these guys are salesmen after all , not televised judges .
more than anything i am baffled by why so many adore wall street .
the only possible solution i can muster is its release date .
and not just the timeliness of the " greed is good " subject matter : the film was plumped down in the eighties , a decade in which the one-joke comedy rose to an art form , and a group of glamorous brat packers smirked their way through inane high concept , low result movies .
in my mind , the eighties will forever be remembered as a decade with not only a proliferation of bad movies , but bad music , bad hair , and bad clothes .
maybe stone's after school special set in wall street was viewed as a welcome change of pace .
boiler room is an equally well-timed film with some similarities to stone's piece of crap .
they both feature a consequential father-son relationship , though boiler room's is much more subtle and touching .
and they are both concerned with the power of greed , yet the men in boiler room are akin to poseurs presuming to be big shots rather than the slippery-smooth , heartless gordon gecko figures of wall street .
boiler room is a message movie as well , though ( at least until the end ) doesn't shove it in our faces .
boiler room is about the pursuit of cash and the degrees to which people will go for that cash .
as i said , this film is indeed timely in a society where who wants to be a millionaire is the number one prime time show every day ( bringing about a revolution of prime time tv watching that hasn't been seen in quite a while ) ; not only do we want to be millionaires , we want to watch other people become millionaires !
in our super-judgmental , power-oriented culture the desire for money supersedes everything ; when you have money , you have it " all " .
and seth ( giovanni ribisi ) wants it " all " the easy way .
he's a well-intentioned college drop out who gets lured into working for an illegally run brokerage firm ( the kind that sells junk stock ) whereupon he meets others just like him .
ben affleck is cast as jim , the company headhunter , who struts in commanding the room like a frat boy gordon gecko .
his job is to influence trainee's into becoming enthusiastic employees by giving a speech that subtly attacks their man hood .
it's ironic that he sells these pups the same load of b . s that they're told to dish out to prospective buyers .
affleck's character is obviously supposed to recall alec baldwin's similar character in glengary glen ross , and that proves detrimental to the actor's performance .
affleck shouts , curses and be-littles his rookie employees just like baldwin , minus the edge .
when alec played the scene he became the part , spewing those brutal lines as if they were his own .
by comparison affleck simply looks as if he were doing a really hammy line reading .
the brokers approach their job with the fervor of overzealous jocks : they storm to work like football players on the way to the big game .
rap music thumps on the soundtrack effectively illustrating who these guys think they are : intellectual gangsters .
they aren't above a rumble as a test of man hood especially during leisure time where the lumbering scott caan seems all too eager to use his fists in minor disputes .
we drink up this world along with seth , and watch him become seduced by it , just like we might be .
as in all cautionary tales , boiler room begins with seducing us into its illustrious world of profit and wrongdoing , then smacks us with the consequences of all the recklessness .
i know this story .
we all do .
but it can work if it's told with intelligence and energy , and that is how writer \ director ben younger tells it .
as a director of ( please excuse my french ) mise-en-scene younger has much to learn .
his style is sitcom bland .
but his writing isn't .
younger's script is well studied in the vernacular of this bunch ; his dialogue is like a junior david mamet .
despite the moderate camera work younger fills his phone-pitch scenes with tension that comes from just the performances and the tightly wound script .
the brokers \ hucksters counter every customer objection , gently bullying them into buying stock .
these moments are filmed like psychological action scenes : a tense confrontation between a victimizer and a victim who isn't aware that he is one .
with the exception of affleck's brief appearances , the performances are truly exceptional .
ribisi , who has the edgy looks of a character actor , is extremely potent here , working his pale angular face , and eerie , plaintive stare for all their worth .
he conveys child-like vulnerability ( his character seems to hide in a corner whenever things aren't going his way ) in some scenes , and in others he's ferociously cut throat .
the jekyll and hyde contradiction works well in the movie : ribisi is confident when it's just him and the phone , but cowardly in front of authority figures including his abrasive father ( authoritatively played by ron rifkin ) .
boiler room thankfully avoids wall street-like histrionics in the sales-pitch sequences ; the sales build slowly like a crescendo of intelligent psychological ploys .
those ploys are taught to seth by chris ( vin diesel ) , a kind broker who alternates between seth's friend and his mentor .
diesl shines in his minor role .
this week i saw the sci-fi opus pitch black in which diesel plays a completely different role in an equally effective manner .
in that film he has the kind of role that might have gone to arnold schwarzenegger in the 80's , and in boiler room he has the kind of role that might have gone to elliot gould in the 70's .
nicky katt is also memorable as a superior broker obsessed with what he can't have .
nia long , as the firm's secretary , ( a lone black women amongst many white men ) is ribisi's love interest in a part that at first looks to be as insignificant as most of the parts this talented actress gets , but develops into something more interesting .
the two make an oddly likeable couple .
long is smart and brash , and ribisi is charmingly aloof .
at one point he says to her " i'm just lookin' for some chocolate love " .
it's a terrible line but ribisi delivers it in such an innocuous child-like way , it becomes sweetly endearing .
unfortunately , towards the end , the boiler room turns a tad schmaltzy .
there is much crying , hugging , and sorrowful stares .
this is okay when taken in small doses , but younger's conclusion is constructed as a series of these boo-hoo moments , one following the other .
a particular misstep is his attempt to show the effect that seth's manipulations have on one of his poor victims .
it's not a bad idea but the execution is lacking , with those scenes feeling tacked on to further spell out the message .
that message being , " greed is bad " .
yes it's patently obvious , but boiler room conveys it by introducing us to a culture that i haven't seen much of in the movies : the disenfranchised twenty something entrepreneur .
and all wall street did was introduce us to a simplistic fantasy world of saints and sinners .
boiler room offers neither extreme .
it gives us what is in between , and for that i am thankful .
| pos | Negative |
i can sum up first strike in one word : awesome .
never in my life have i seen an actor as insanely dedicated as jackie chan .
for the simple reason that he has performed his own stunts in his every movie he's ever appeared in , he should be awarded greatly .
the same tom and jerry formula that was used to make chan's rumble in the bronx and supercop so entertaining can be found here as well .
however , first strike was probably the most exciting out of the three , for the simple reason that practice makes perfect .
his last two movies were almost like practice and this one was great .
like rumble , this film is about the mafia , the former kgb .
now chan must do battle in the freezing arctic temperatures of the ukraine against a group of very large bad men .
the trailer for the film sums it up quite well .
first strike is action-packed , but the fight scenes are so fast and furious , they almost have a witty , italian-like humor to them .
jackie chan is a regular comedian .
well , he's no eddie murphy , but he can really crack you up .
for example , he is hanging off a roof and he humorously taunts his foes to come and get him , as he claims to be the korean 007 ( that's secret agent james bond ) .
even the plot to this film improved above the others , as a sort-of twisted nuclear-weapon smuggling deal is botched and jackie takes the blame .
but never fear , as the chinese mafia aids him in uncovering the truth behind the incident .
with some of the most high-flying stunts and side-splitting comedy , first strike is a sure-fire hit that's guaranteed to draw some major , world-wide attention .
,
| pos | Positive |
at first glance , i thought that the sword and the sorceror had promise .
its plotline goes like this : the evil king cromwell , desiring to take over the world , resurrects an evil , ancient sorceror , xusia for power .
he attacks the kingdom of eh-dan and kills young prince talon's parents .
given a triple-bladed sword ( which can shoot bad guys , like a gun ) by his dying father , talon vows for revenge .
eleven years later , when he's established his own army , the mercaneries , he vows to take back his kingdom .
along the way , he meets up with alana , whose village is attacked by drunken guards and her brother is kidnapped by cromwell .
talon vows to help , and , after a series of minor escapades , eventually ends up rescuing alana's brother ( and several other prisoners ) , only to be captured himself ( in other words , put on a cross to be crucified ! ) .
fortunately he frees himself , rescues alana from marrying cromwell , defeats xusia , and then cromwell , all with his triple bladed sword ( during the final battle , the blade breaks , but talon finishes cromwell off by using a hidden dagger in the blade ) .
then , everything ends happily .
unfortunately , the sword and the sorcerer is not even half as good as it sounds .
what would have been a great film is completely destroyed by uneven plot jumping , bad acting , and gruesomely gory , bloody scenes .
never once does the story seem to connect together , it just jumps around repeatedly .
this problem is extremely noticeable in the opening scene where cromwell resurrects xusia .
after telling him that he needs his help , he leads the warlock out into daylight , but then stabs him and sends him careening off a cliff afterwards .
wait a minute , didn't the plotline say that he needs the help of xusia in order to invade eh-dan , which he cannot do by military force ?
if that is the case , why does he dispose of xusia after resurrecting him ?
and why does he manage to take over eh-dan anyway ?
these questions are just never - no , never - answered in the film .
another example is that one moment we see talon fighting for his life , another moment we see him just about to be crucified during alana's wedding to cromwell ( ! ) , and finally at the end , instead of settling down with alana , he just tells her to " wait " , and then he just rides off !
in addition to the extremely bloody scenes , this uneven plot jumping completely destroys what would have been a great fantasy adventure .
even some attempts to make it exciting , a few fire scenes , battle scenes , don't work .
it just completely fails altogether miserably .
the only good thing about this film is its musical score , contributed by david whittaker , who had an ( extremely ) short music composing career .
the score is boomy and adventurous , powerful , and a billion times better than this film is .
my suggestion : steer the hell away from this bloody mess and buy the soundtrack album instead ( if you can find it ) .
ironically , though , before the film's credits roll , there is a message indicating that a sequel , tales of the ancient empire , would follow .
to my relief ( and delight ) , it never got into production , because the sword and the sorcerer laid an egg at the box office , grossing only $39 million .
critics were right on in slamming the sword and the sorcerer , all right .
leonard maltin rightfully called it " second rate in scripting , and acting " and at-a-glance film reviews called it " a confusing , stupid , unimaginative , unengaging , bloodfilled bore " .
i totally agree with these reviews , all right , and i hope that this piece of #$% !
will be forgotten about .
there are far better fantasy movies than the sword and the sorcerer .
i hope you get a good laugh out of this review , but i am not laughing .
in fact , my insults don't even come close to the gruesome sickness that this film gave me throughout its 100 minute running time .
| neg | Negative |
breakdown is an moderately entertaining , if underwhelming , thriller .
kurt russell and kathleen quinlan play couple jeff and amy taylor , taking the scenic route to california through redneck country .
however , while in the middle of nowhere , their jeep decides to break down , leaving them stranded .
a friendly truck driver , warren ( walsh ) , offers to give them a lift to town .
although jeff rejects the offer ( he wants to stay with his car ) , amy agrees , hops into warren's lorry , and promptly disappears .
jeff wonders where the hell she is , and when he later catches up with warren and warren says he has never seen amy in his life , the plot thickens and jeff goes on a chase to find his wife .
although comparisons can be made with this film to deliverance ( 1972 ) and the vanishing ( 1993 ) plot wise , the latter two are far superior character and script wise .
kurt russell is o . k as jeff , although he can seemingly only pull of one expression , which is angry .
throughout the whole film , he looks angry ( or just pissed off . )
quinlan is o . k again , but again she can only pull off one expression , which is looking dorky .
throughout the whole film , she looks dorky .
j . t walsh ( who , sadly , recently passed away ) is fine as warren ( who we soon find out is a kidnapper ) although his actual character is pretty weak , and not really menacing enough .
the supporting cast do their best aswell , with rex linn as a doubting sheriff , and the other kidnappers .
the story , written by first-timer jonathan mostow ( who also directs ) is o . k , if surprisingly familiar and sometimes extraordinarily stupid .
some of the things the characters do in this movie is beyond the bounds of idiocy .
there are some flaws with the plot also , as the characters do the complete opposite to logical ( presumably to keep the story 'exciting' ) and also the fact that the story just isn't strong enough to sustain the audience's attention .
the picture moves along very slowly also .
it almost threatens to drop dead .
the picture does pick up towards the end , but by then it's too late .
mostow directs the action sequences well enough , however .
the film doesn't really come to a satisfying conclusion , either .
the ending tries to be bleak , but just comes off annoying .
breakdown could of been a far more enjoyable picture had it had a stronger cast and director .
instead , it just turns out to be merely average .
a missed opportunity .
overall rating= review by david wilcock
| neg | Negative |
this is a good year if you want plenty of sci-fi on your multiplex .
>from the comedies mars attacks and men in black , to luc besson's powerful the fifth element , and to this , sci-fi/horror that is event horizon .
( more is on the way with contact and alien : ressurection being released later this year . )
the story is thus : in 2040 an explorer ship called the event horizon tests out a newly invented gravity drive .
a device that enables a craft to travel anywhere in the universe , instantaneously .
this is achieved by creating a gateway , infact , a black hole , between the craft and it's required destination .
in this case , from near neptune to proxima prime .
however , when the event horizon attempts this , it dissappears , without trace , leaving two searches for it fruitless .
seven years later , it reappears , transmitting a distress signal and this is where the film starts .
a search and rescue ship is sent out to investigate .
the team is led by laurence fishburne , and joining them is sam neill who plays the scientist that invented the gravity drive .
as the team search the event horizon , they find no trace of the crew but plenty of blood lying around .
not a good sign . . .
to make matters worse , as they search the ship , they find themselves being subjected to a series of illusions based on their own individual inner secrets and worse , some very bloody events start to occur as they slowly piece together the events that transpired on the ship seven years ago .
it soon becomes apparent that , wherever the ship went , it bought something back with it .
something very , very evil . . .
the first thing you'll notice in this film is it's incredible visual effects .
they really are eye popping , with some great models to boot .
the acting is quite good , with some occasional witty moments .
sam neill does a good job as the scientist that increasingly becomes more and more disturbed as the search continues , but a tip of the hat goes to laurence fishburne who leads the team , in a cool , calm , take no nonense manner .
it is his acting skills that help hold this film together .
the idea behind event horizon is certainly a good one .
it starts off incredibly well , but the middle section becomes quite confused and sometimes muddled , leaving the viewer unsure on just what the reasons are behind some of the bloody and bizarre events that occur .
however , the closing 20 minutes of the film more than make up for this , producing one the most nail biting ( or in my case , straw of my drink biting ! )
climaxes i've recently witnessed .
overall , event horizon is a smart film indeed .
it's very enjoyable and has some amazing visuals .
but be warned , the horror scenes , despite being very brief are very , very , gory .
not for the squemish !
| pos | Positive |
i'll bet right now you're just lounging by the pool , humming " i will always love you " and wistfully recalling your candlelight dinners with success .
it isn't necessarily over for you : i say you still have enough charm that you could avoid starring in " kevin ! "
for at least a few more years .
begin by scribbling " the star that burns twice as bright burns half as long " somewhere you'll always see it , perhaps on the fridge door , or on a bedroom mirror with lipstick .
you had a heck of a thing going there until you agreed to star in robin hood : prince of thieves , where you were not only upstaged by powerhouses morgan freeman and alan rickman , but christian slater ( ! ) , several dozen tall trees , bows , arrows , and a canoe , too .
after dances with wolves and jfk , you decided the world needed more three hour movies , expensive three hour movies , so you starred in and produced wyatt earp ; wyatt earp the man was a boring idiot who made the history books solely due to a general lack of famous wyatts .
wyatt earp was so dull a cowboy that he died of natural causes .
tombstone was a vastly superior movie based on the same legend , and that featured kurt russell as earp and dana delaney as his girlfriend !
( she was played by joanna going in your movie-you know , the character known best in wyatt earp as " jew whore " .
what were you and lawrence kasdan thinking ? )
now , you're suffering the demise of yet another of your epics , the postman , a film so financially disastrous that it all but eradicated the memory waterworld's and tin cup's mildly lucrative box office takes .
the postman is not the worst movie ever made-people in hollywood are quick to forget movies like howard the duck whenever the next bomb comes along .
yet it is a ridiculous movie .
i suspect you thought you had another braveheart on your hands-why else line up two armies on horesback , all prepared for battle , for the climax of your film ? -but
" mailheart " the postman is not .
( i can think of some more appropriate alternate titles : post encounters of the worst kind ; farewell , my salary ; howard the postman ; the postman's never watched twice . . . )
what a brown movie .
i hate brown .
you love brown .
dances with wolves was golden and brown-it looked like an eggo commercial .
the postman had me running for a glass of water every two minutes ; would the post-apocalyptic world look this maddeningly bland and dry ?
what exactly happened to this desert world , anyway ?
did we all become so stupid that we didn't immediately begin rebuilding homes , restaurants , and most importantly , shopping malls , after " the war " ?
why did you choose to drive the movie's plot with a dumb group of terrorists who , well , terrorize townfolk across america ?
why is it only * they * have ammunition , anyway ?
was it really appropriate to cast your daughter as a girl who has a sweet crush on you , the drifter-cum-postman ?
why cast english actress olivia williams as an american ?
don't you realize that european women can only deliver their big emotional scenes in their native accent ?
( take a look at the less-than-stellar performances of an american-ized nicole kidman or an american-ized minnie driver . )
who could give a damn whether you lived or died at the end of this movie ?
if it came down to a fight for leadership between you and the leader of the terrorists , why didn't you do that halfway through the film and save us all a lot of headaches ?
why cast will patton as the bad guy ?
because you worked with him in no way out ?
sure , he's a suitably creepy villain ; know why ?
because he's creepy in everything , including armageddon , in which he plays a heroic astronaut who practically slithers into his space suit !
why heroize the most demonic institution in america , the u . s . postal system ?
was tom petty supposed to be playing tom petty ?
if so , why didn't he look more skeletal ?
( he should have been around 70 years old . )
why , oh why , do i have so many questions ?
( i could ask plenty more . )
shouldn't a three hour running time have provided you enough space to answer everything ?
you have one great line in this film , and you deliver it to a mule ! :
" the things i like about my ass . . . "
i had to wonder .
actually , i enjoyed the tone of the opening scenes , a relaxed cynicism , if you'll accept such clunky phrasing-too bad you couldn't resist the temptation to film yet another love letter to your country .
ultimately , i'm saying relax .
there is no quota , no need for you to make a picture a year .
settle down .
really question future screenplays before you commit to them .
feel free to write back .
i know how much you like letters .
| neg | Negative |
synopsis : bobby garfield ( yelchin ) lives in a small town with his mirthless widowed mother ( hope davis ) .
bobby's world revolves around his friends , especially the spritely carol ( boorem ) .
then one day , a new boarder arrives at bobby's house .
ted brautigan ( hopkins ) is an enigmatic man to whom bobby takes an immediate liking .
as the bond between bobby and ted deepens , bobby becomes privy to ted's great secret , an event which will change both of their lives forever .
review : a small but enchanting movie , " hearts in atlantis " easily recalls another king-inspired coming-of-age film , " stand by me " , both in terms of its setting and the sentiment it conveys .
" hearts " is a tribute to the magic of childhood , to those summers when the days seem neverending , and nothing means more than your closest friends .
unlike " stand by me " , there is a supernatural element to " hearts " , but although it is key to the plot , it is not prominent .
like " stand by me " , this is a mostly character-driven film , and as such it benefits greatly from superb casting .
yelchin is very good as bobby , finding a good mix of innocence and resignation .
more splendid still is boorem , whom i praised highly for her work in " along came a spider " and who is simply radiant here as carol .
and then there is hopkins , who despite playing such a quiet , introspective character as ted , nonetheless commands our attention every time he is onscreen .
less successful is davis , whose strident elizabeth comes across as overly cartoonish .
i also found it odd that bobby and carol's other friend , sully ( whose death as an adult sets up the movie's flashback framing device ) , is paid virtually no attention .
but hicks' direction is lovely without being cloying , and despite the movie's general lack of incident , it never ceases to weave its spell over the audience .
| pos | Positive |
i suppose it's unfair to criticize a movie like hudson hawk , which has been panned by reviewers and moviegoers alike since it's 1991 release .
michael lehmann's action-comedy was quick to win the title `biggest box office flop of all time' , or close thereof .
the movie stars bruce willis as renowned cat burglar hudson hawk , who's just been released from sing sing prison after many years in isolation ( `let me put it this way , ' he explains , `i never saw et' ) .
greeting him is his old friend and partner in crime ( played by danny aiello ) , who becomes the subject of many amusing fat jokes .
these are rather welcome in a movie filled with so many completely unfunny sight gags , cartoonish villains and unbelievable coincidences .
it appears as if director lehmann didn't know when to stop all the absurd silliness , and he piles on layer after layer of utter ridiculousness as the movie propels itself toward the finish line .
if at some point during hudson hawk you make the assumption that things couldn't get goofier , you'll soon be eating your words .
but , i'm inclined to say that this film is not quite as terrible as it's box office numbers suggest .
it's fast-paced and entertaining , if you've got incredible patience and a warped sense of humor .
for the first portion of this review , i'm going to try and center on the positive aspects of hudson hawk .
wish me luck .
first and foremost : bruce willis is a good sport .
while i'm not entirely sure what he was smoking when he co-wrote this script , willis is quite aware that the entire project is a big , fat , ugly joke .
he constantly gives deadpan reactions to things that are very silly and out-of-place , which means he has more than his share of deadpan reactions .
another plus is the appearance of andie macdowell as a schizophrenic nun and love interest for the title character .
they meet when hudson goes on a mission to steal a priceless book from the vatican , and their relationship escalates in interest from there .
it's unfortunate that mcdowell's one-note character is used just as an excuse for there to be a predictable plot-twist , and she offers absolutely no encouraging chemistry with willis .
but now i'm rambling on again about the negative things , aren't i ?
enough of the charade - for the most part , hudson hawk is an excruciating experience .
it's stupid , pointless and repetitive .
i can only wonder what bruce willis fans thought after exiting the theater , because this film really doesn't have the potential to please anyone .
action fans should take note that hudson hawk is composed of 90% comedy , and even the action sequences are skittery , rushed and poorly edited .
and those expecting a hearty laugh or two will find it difficult even to smirk during all of the headache-inducing hi-jinks .
don't get me wrong , this film is not devoid of laughs .
it's too bad most of them are unintentional , or just plain forced .
the impressive cast looks suitably embarrassed .
it's understandable to see willis and aiello in a movie of this caliber , but as for the presence of future academy award winner james coburn i'm not entirely sure .
coburn plays a former nemesis of the hawk who again comes into play , and he looks unsure of his place the entire movie .
especially when he resorts to martial arts during the final showdown , and has a fight with willis that would look right at home in a jackie chan film .
things get more bizarre when we're introduced to his team of rejects named after chocolate bars , including future nypd blue star david caruso as the speechless , card-flipping kit-kat .
if that's not enough for you , there's richard e . grant and sandra bernhard hamming it up as a deranged couple on the brink of a convoluted economic takeover .
their crotch-biting pooch provides a couple of the big laughs here .
wait , maybe the only big laughs . . .
i'm not sure what kind of movie everyone had in mind when filming hudson hawk .
i can't even begin to start about the film's absurd plot ; but let's not get into that .
i suppose there's some amusement viewers could derive from the ridiculous premise , if they were that desperate .
but hudson hawk never even has a clue of where it's going from minute one , and from there it's 90 minutes of pure cinematic muck .
| neg | Negative |
the yet-to-be-released krippendorf's tribe is being marketed as a family comedy , but buyer beware .
this movie can't make up its mind .
is it a family comedy with vulgar references to both the male and female bodies , menstruation , circumcision , and sex that would make any parents squirm at the thought of having their child next to them ?
or is it an adult comedy approached with such immaturity that only adolescents will appreciate the effort ?
either way , " unbalanced " is the word to stamp on this hit and miss and miss and miss effort .
the premise is catchy - widowed anthropology professor james krippendorf ( richard dreyfuss ) has spent the past two years " getting over " the death of his wife , neglecting key research and squandering grant money on personal living expenses .
now it's time to show what he's achieved in those two years , and he has absolutely nothing to show for it .
with a fabricated tale of studying a previously undiscovered tribe in new guinea , krippendorf petitions for new funds while hiding the fact that the previous $100 , 000 grant was spent on trips to mcdonald's .
but when his " discovery " becomes the latest craze among colleagues , the professor finds he must do more than talk about the tribe - he must create it .
with the aid of his three children , the headstrong teen shelly ( natasha lyonne of everyone says i love you ) , the slightly younger mickey ( gregory smith ) , and the nine-year-old edmund ( carl michael lindner ) , the " shelmikedmu " tribe ( named from the first half of each child's name ) is born , and videos quickly produced in krippendorf's backyard are passed off as stunning documentary footage of the newly found new guinea tribe .
despite the professor's wishes , the buzz surrounding his discovery only grows , due in greatest part to veronica micelli ( jenna elfman ) , an overly vivacious ( and voluptuous ) anthropologist who barges her way into the discovery and basically deems herself krippendorf's main assistant .
hungry for recognition , micelli sets up interviews , lectures , etc . in an effort to make this the biggest sociological event in history , a sure fire way to go down in the history books .
krippendorf , on the other hand , is seeing himself go down a jail cell corridor , not in history books , and with each new lecture , he must come up with something impressive to unleash about the tribe - mating habits , domestic structure , etc . thru fumbling improvisation , and often some quick thinking from his oldest son , krippendorf makes it thru each new lecture , but only creates more and more interest in the highly unique tribe .
on the opposing end is krippendorf's arch rival , ruth allen ( lily tomlin ) , an arrogant professor whose jealousy drives her on a mission to disprove the existance of the non-existent tribe .
it's a cute idea , and approached with a more subtle ( and mature ) style , krippendorf's tribe could've been a real winner .
sadly , the mostly-misfired toilet humor , overly comical musical score ( by bruce broughton ) , and sugar coated sentiments ( all the key ingredients of a " family comedy " ) just aren't the right tone for this film .
cut that crap out , add some razor sharp dialogue and witty sociological perceptions and you've got a good start .
at the state it's in now , you've got something along the lines of medicine man meets mrs .
doubtfire meets dumb & dumber , and that's not a concoction anyone should be overly anxious to try .
the overall product here is a highly forgettable cup of " average " , with a few laugh-out-loud moments and a great big gap in between them .
most of the characters are surprisingly two-dimensional , and the only one who seems to exhibit any real acting effort ( lyonne ) seems to go greatly unappreciated .
director todd holland has gone about making this film in all the wrong ways .
it's stuck in limbo between disney family fare ( jungle 2 jungle ) and potentially hilarious adult comedy ( a fish called wanda ) .
it's this unbalanced structure that really knocks it down a grade , and it's a brutal drop .
a strong warning to parents : forget the impression given by advertisements , do you want to take your kids to a film that has a woman asking a man if he finds her attractive merely because she's holding his penis ?
yes , it's put that bluntly !
just be warned - this is merely one example of the many shocking subjects to be brought up in the film , and others might not be as tame .
| neg | Negative |
in the first death wish movie , mild-mannered new york architect paul kersey , played by charles bronson , was avenging the death of his wife .
in the second , he was avenging his daughter .
in the third , he instigated small war in order to avenge the old friend .
fourth movie , on the other hand , begins with kersey doubting the point of his violent crusades and living the quiet life with his girlfriend karen , played by kay lenz .
however , since this is death wish movie , we know that sooner or later something bad is going to happen to the people kersey cares for .
this time karen's teenage daughter dies of a crack overdose and kersey is forced to return to his old vigilante ways .
kersey's new targets , unlike the previous movies , aren't the ordinary street punks but rich , heavily armed and well-connected drug dealers .
even such unstoppable killing machine like kersey needs some support , and it comes from the publisher nathan white ( john p . ryan ) , determined to avenge the drug-related death of his own daughter .
white's plan is to make kersey kill major players in two rival drug dealing organisations and thus instigate the war between them .
the plan begins to take shape , but kersey's actions bring attention of two police detectives - reiner ( george dickerson ) and nozaki ( soon teck-oh ) .
fourth ( and , unfortunately , not the final ) installment in the death wish series , will probably remembered as the typical movie of cannon group , production company responsible for some of the worst cinematic trash of the last decade .
however , although some critics might argue , death wish 4 : the crackdown represents slight improvement over the death wish 3 . paul kersey , one of the most intriguing ( and potentially controversial ) characters of the 1970s , is still being dumbed down by mediocre script , and charles bronson really doesn't feel the need to put much effort in his acting .
however , the hand of a veteran director j . lee thompson seems more capable of michael winner's and the action scenes seem slightly less surreal , although they still look cheap and repetitive and downright boring .
there are some attempts for the movie to have a plot between the numerous scenes of violence , and one of such attempts is a potentially interesting plot twist at the end .
the script even tries to fake some social conscience ( through criminally underused kay lenz's character ) and predates the war on drugs campaign that would inspire many hollywood products in next few years .
there are even some half-hearted attempts of humour - both intentional and unintentional , like in a scene where kersey assassinates mob figures by a wine bottle - but the quality of this movie is still far away from bronson's 1970s classics .
( special note to x-philes : mith pilleggi , the actor who plays ad skinner in the x- files , could be seen in a small role of cannery lab foreman ) .
| neg | Negative |