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(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | hate | How many times the word 'hate' appears in the text? | 0 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | except | How many times the word 'except' appears in the text? | 0 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | be | How many times the word 'be' appears in the text? | 3 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | objective | How many times the word 'objective' appears in the text? | 0 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | people | How many times the word 'people' appears in the text? | 3 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | slightly | How many times the word 'slightly' appears in the text? | 2 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | montcornet | How many times the word 'montcornet' appears in the text? | 0 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | speaks | How many times the word 'speaks' appears in the text? | 0 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | seat | How many times the word 'seat' appears in the text? | 2 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | funeral | How many times the word 'funeral' appears in the text? | 0 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | its | How many times the word 'its' appears in the text? | 3 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | perceive | How many times the word 'perceive' appears in the text? | 0 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | against | How many times the word 'against' appears in the text? | 3 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | q | How many times the word 'q' appears in the text? | 2 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | top | How many times the word 'top' appears in the text? | 2 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | chiding | How many times the word 'chiding' appears in the text? | 2 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | forenoon | How many times the word 'forenoon' appears in the text? | 0 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | hood | How many times the word 'hood' appears in the text? | 2 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | wheelchair | How many times the word 'wheelchair' appears in the text? | 2 |
(confused by Jerome's attitude) This calls for a celebration. Doesn't it? JEROME The place is crawling with Hoovers. EUGENE So what? You didn't kill him, did you? Jerome shoots him a glance for the inappropriate remark. JEROME That's not the point. EUGENE (scoffing) Hey, how much of you can be there? Even if the "J. Edgars" do find something, in a week-- (glancing up to the night sky) you'll be slightly out of their jurisdiction. (gently chiding) Come on, we've got to get drunk immediately. JEROME (still tempering Eugene's enthusiasm) You're going to have to earn your supper. I've got my final physical tomorrow. Jerome wheels Eugene's chair to a specially constructed platform that allows the wheels to spin in mid-air. Jerome tapes an electrode to Eugene's chest and attaches the wire to a slim recording device. Eugene begins to spin the wheel of the chair faster and faster. Jerome monitors Eugene's steady heartbeat through a set of headphones. INT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - COMPUTER COMPLEX. NIGHT. The complex is virtually empty - only a handful of the hundreds of PROGRAMMERS working late into the night. IRENE approaches JEROME's work station on the pretext of delivering some documents. Trying to act casually, she looks under the papers on his desk, then opens the top desk drawer. We see an EXTREME CLOSE UP of the comb lying there - the two hairs trapped between the teeth of the comb. Irene removes one of the follicles and drops it into an envelope she is carrying. INT. 24-HOUR SEQUENCING LAB. NIGHT. "SEQUENCING-WHILE-U-WAIT". Similar to a 1-hour photo lab, the store - little more than a booth - displays a price list on the wall. "FULL SEQUENCE - $80". IRENE waits in line with a cross- section of other CUSTOMERS. She checks the contents of the envelope that contains the hair. The YOUNG WOMAN in line ahead of her allows the TECHNICIAN to take a swab from her full lips with a Q-tip. TECHNICIAN How old? YOUNG WOMAN (confused) Me? TECHNICIAN (mustering patience, referring to the Q-tip) The specimen. YOUUNG WOMAN (proudly) I kissed him five minutes ago. A real good one. Overhearing, several PEOPLE in the line snicker. TECHNICIAN (long-suffering) I'll see what I can do. The technician hands the swab to an ASSISTANT. The Young Woman is handed a number and takes a seat. Irene hands her envelope over the counter. She too is handed a number. We follow Jerome's follicle as another TECHNICIAN places it in an analyzing machine. INT/EXT. SEQUENCING LAB / PARKING LOT. NIGHT. The TECHNICIAN returns the envelope to IRENE along with a miniature compact disc. TECHNICIAN (remarking on the profile result) 9.4...very nice. Irene does not appear to share the technician's enthusiasm. She emerges from the sequencing lab and enters her car. Taking a palm-top computer from her purse, she inserts the disc into the computer. Jerome's counterfeit genetic profile appears on the screen. The details confirm her worst fears. EXT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. JEROME and EUGENE, dressed to the nines, pull up in the car to a darkened doorway in a poorly lit street. A VALET appears out of the shadows. Familiar with the car, he goes immediately to the trunk to retrieve Eugene's collapsible wheelchair. Jerome tips the valet - a credit card wiped through a device. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. The chic, elegant establishment inside belies its darkened exterior. JEROME wheels EUGENE into a decadent dinner club full of an odd assortment of people. They are immediately greeted respectfully by MICHAEL, the owner and maitre d'. Jerome and Eugene are obviously regulars. MICHAEL Good evening, gentlemen. Your table is ready. (referring to Jerome's mission) Not long now, sir. You'll be upstairs before you know it. We're going to miss you. JEROME Not as much as I'll miss your Stroganoff. I'd like to take one of your chefs with me. INT. MICHAEL'S DINNER CLUB. NIGHT. In a secluded booth JEROME and EUGENE toast from a bottle of 1999 vintage Bordeaux. Eugene drinks longer than Jerome. Jerome dabs his mouth with a napkin. He fails to notice a minute FLAKE OF SKIN dislodged from his chin. We follow the flake as it comes to rest beneath the table. LATER, Eugene and Jerome watch COUPLES dancing a samba on the dance floor. A WAITER vacuums the table with a discreet, handheld miniature vacuum while a WAITRESS clears the plates. She accidentally drops a knife onto Eugene's leg. WAITRESS (aghast at the sight of his lifeless legs) I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? EUGENE (smiling, a trace of bitterness) Honey, if you'd hurt me, I'd be cured. Eugene, the worse for drink, gropes for the waitress's leg but she easily avoids his clumsy pass. EUGENE You want to meet a real-life spaceman? Jerome, always aware, scanning the club, suddenly spies NAPOLEON, his Gattaca colleague, on the other side of the room. Napoleon is taking a hit from a vial concealed in his hand. Jerome abruptly turns his back to avoid being recognized. JEROME Let's get out of here. EUGENE (knocking back his drink, misinterpreting the hasty departure) You're right, there's more atmosphere where you're going. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. Driving along the freeway, Jerome's car suddenly dives down an escape road. EUGENE looks sideways at JEROME. JEROME You drive. INT/EXT. CAR. NIGHT. The car careens around and around a small circular building - a cloud of dust billowing up behind the car. We focus on a BRICK wedged against the car's gas pedal. EUGENE is at the wheel, JEROME in the passenger seat. The hard turn is repeated with increasing recklessness, Eugene fighting to control the bucking car. EUGENE (screaming in both fear and exhilaration) I gotta stop!! I gotta stop!! JEROME Keep going!! Keep going!! Finally the car spins to a halt in a cloud of dust. When the dust settles it is revealed that they have been circling the base of a huge satellite dish in a desolate location. EXT. SATELLITE DISH. NIGHT. EUGENE lies on the hood of the car, leaning against the windshield, drinking from a bottle of vodka. In the background, the unmanned satellite dish. JEROME relieves himself against the building at the base of the satellite. EUGENE (gently chiding Jerome over the joyride) You idiot. You could ruin everything with a stunt like that. Eugene spies a spacecraft launching from Gattaca city. EUGENE (gazing up into the night sky) At least up there your piss will be worth something. (smiling at the thought) You'll all be showering in it, right? JEROME (zipping his fly) And drinking it. It's like Evian by the time it's filtered. EUGENE (referring to the rocket ship) What is that one? Jerome doesn't bother to look in the direction of the craft but merely glances to his watch. He joins Eugene on the hood of the car. JEROME (looking at his watch) 11.15 to the port. A maintenance crew. EUGENE How long do you stay up there before you go? JEROME A day or so. EUGENE (beaming) I still can't believe they're sending you to the Belt--you of all people--never meant to be born, on a mission to discover the origin of life. Eugene laughs to himself and passes the bottle to Jerome. JEROME You should be going instead of me. Jerome taps Eugene's lifeless legs with his foot. JEROME Up there they wouldn't be a problem. EUGENE (glancing heavenwards, shaking his head) You know I'm scared of heights. INT. CRIME LABORATORY - AUTOPSY ROOM. NIGHT. The body and clothing of the MISSION DIRECTOR, lying on a metal examining table is scanned with a blue-light magnifying instrument. Fingernail specimens are taken for analysis. In another area of the laboratory, the labelled vacuum bags are attached to analyzers and the contents sucked out and automatically identified. ID names and photographs of GATTACA EMPLOYEES begin appearing on a computer screen at high speed along with other personal details - all data automatically logged for later review. The photographs and personal details of JEROME and IRENE flash past, amongst the faces of other employees. We focus on a magnified close up of JEROME'S EYELASH, still clinging stubbornly to the side of its specimen bag. We continue to follow its journey as it is finally sucked into the analyzer. INT. CRIME LAB - ANALYZER MACHINE. NIGHT. Inside the machine, a minute, cell-thin sliver is sliced from JEROME'S EYELASH and analyzed. INT. INVESTIGATOR'S CRIME LAB. NIGHT. A severed HUMAN TONGUE sits on a tray in a sterile, sealed chamber. Using gloves that protrude through the chamber's glass wall, face buried in a binocular eyepiece, the INVESTIGATOR takes a swab from the tongue. INVESTIGATOR (to the tongue, as he inserts the tip of the swab into an analyzer) Let's see what you've got to say for yourself. A FEMALE ASSISTANT, looking on, hardly has time to smile at the remark before information begins to appear on a nearby computer terminal. The computer gradually builds a portrait of the owner of the tongue using genetic predictors. The Investigator wanders over to the window as his Assistant reads the information from the screen. ASSISTANT The tongue is male. Mature. Blonse hair. Brown eyes. Light complexion. Between 5'11 and 6'1. Pronounced Caucasian nose. Thin lips. Weak chin. Lobeless ears. Prematurely balding. Slightly bow-legged. Broad shoulders. Barrel chest... (pause) Blind. INVESTIGATOR (interest piqued) Blind? (mildly amused, checking the monitor for himself) The tongue is blind? ASSISTANT (confused) Who cuts out the tongue of a blind man? INVESTIGATOR (shrugs) Someone who is mindful that the blind still speak. The INVESTIGATOR is alerted by the chime of his nearby computer. On the screen, he discovers the face of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT and the accompanying flashing message: TRACKING IN-VALID 883000181105-10 - NEW DATA - INT. CONDOMINIUM COMPLEX - PARKING GARAGE. NIGHT. Having plugged his car into an overnight charger, JEROME pushes EUGENE in his wheelchair to the elevator. Bottle in hand, Eugene leans over and vomits on the ground. Jerome shakes his head resignedly. Eugene looks drunkenly up at Jerome. EUGENE (sarcastically referring to the pool of vomit) I'm sorry. Did you want it? Jerome meets Eugene's gaze. There is a trace of bitterness in Eugene's drunken smile. EUGENE Let me get it for you. Eugene bends down to scoop up some vomit with his hand but the elevator arrives and Jerome quickly wheels him away. Eugene's head flops to the side as he passes out. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. JEROME unlocks EUGENE's condo and wheels his chair inside. We see their reflection in a full-length mirror as Jerome pushes Eugene to the bedroom. After removing Eugene's soiled clothing, he heaves the tall man from the chair and onto the bed. EUGENE (maudlin, sobbing like a child) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. JEROME (attempting to comfort) It's okay, Eugene. EUGENE You know I wasn't drunk--I knew what I was doing when I walked in front of that car-- JEROME --What car?--Go to sleep. EUGENE --I walked right in front of it. I was never more sober in my life. Jerome looks at Eugene's lifeless legs, trying to cover his shock at the revelation. JEROME It's all right. EUGENE (grabbing Jerome by the collar) I'm proud of you, Vincent. Eugene's head falls back onto the pillow. JEROME (smiling to himself) You must be drunk to call me Vincent. But Eugene does not reply, drifting into sleep once again. Jerome pulls a blanket over him. On the verge of leaving, Jerome's attention is drawn to a wall on the far side of the room. Approaching the wall, near Eugene's mirrored closet, he detects a faint mechanical whir coming from inside the adjacent condominium. Jerome contemplates investigating but exits the condominium instead - climbing the spiral staircase to his own condominium. INT. JEROME'S CONDO - LIVING ROOM. NIGHT. JEROME fastidiously vacuums with an upright cleaner. Using a hose attachment he cleans around a picture frame that contains Jerome's original computer keyboard handdrawn on the flap of a cardboard box. INT. GATTACA - COMPUTER COMPLEX. DAY. In the vast room of COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS we pull-focus to discover that we have been filming the complex through the transparent specimen bag containing JEROME'S EYELASH. On the mezzanine floor overlooking the scene of the crime, the INVESTIGATOR holds the bag, transfixed by the lash. The lead homicide detective, DETECTIVE HUGO, finishes interviewing a GATTACA SECURITY GUARD and approaches the Investigator. A large telescope in the background. Although Hugo is deferential to his more youthful superior, his body language betrays his displeasure. Hugo clearly does not relish the Investigator's involvement in his case. DETECTIVE HUGO I don't understand why you were dragged out here, Sir. It's hardly worth wasting your time--a no-nothing case like this. INVESTIGATOR (gently rebuking his subordinate) A man's dead, Detective. DETECTIVE HUGO Of course, Sir. We're checking the entry log, alibis, grudges... INVESTIGATOR Grudges? DETECTIVE HUGO (looking out over the balcony) I look around, I see a lot of dry eyes. The Director was not... (searching for the words) ...universally loved. He was leading the cut-backs in the program. You're looking at a room full of motives. INVESTIGATOR (shaking his head adamantly, referring to the bag in his hand) No, this is your man. DETECTIVE HUGO (not so convinced) With respect, Sir--it may be the only unaccountable specimen but the profile suggests-- INVESTIGATOR --What about his profile? Hugo refers to a print-out of 20-YEAR-OLD VINCENT's profile including his Genetic Quotient. (The fifteen-year-old photo of Vincent now bears little resemblance to his assumed identity.) DETECTIVE HUGO According to this, he's a sick man. Congenital heart condition. Who knows how long the specimen has been here but there's an 80 percent chance the owner of that eyelash has already died himself from natural causes. INVESTIGATOR (terse) So there's a 20 percent chance he's not dead. Detective Hugo goes to comment further, then revises his remark in his head before speaking. DETECTIVE HUGO Even if this Vincent Luca is alive, is it likely he could bludgeon a man to death? INVESTIGATOR No. Not likely. The Investigator's tone suggests that the identity of the culprit is no longer a matter for debate. There is an awkward pause before the Detective falls into step with his superior. DETECTIVE HUGO I take it you're thinking along the lines of a robbery gone sour--a thief disturbed in the act? The Investigator merely shrugs. DETECTIVE HUGO (skeptical) Of course that doesn't jibe with what we found. This was an angry killing. INVESTIGATOR (glancing to the profile in Hugo's hand) Who knows with these "deficients"? His profile indicates a proclivity for violence. DETECTIVE HUGO (trying to appear co-operative) I'll run a crossover on the eyelash for any family or associate connections-- INVESTIGATOR --I've already run it. There's no record of any living relative. DETECTIVE HUGO What a pity. INVESTIGATOR (irritated, glancing to the sample bag) Detective Hugo, it's a simple case of lost and found. All we have to do is locate the man who's minus an eyelash and this murder will solve itself. We focus on JEROME at his work station. Although he continues to work, he clrarly feels the presence of the INVESTIGATORS on the mezzanine floor behind him. A MEDICAL DIRECTOR approaches the programmer in the neighboring work station - NAPOLEON, the programmer Jerome encountered in the nightclub the previous evening. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Napoleon, you're late for your substance test. Napoleon looks up, ashen-faced. Jerome intervenes. JEROME Director, Napoleon's helping me today. The Director regards both men suspiciously. MEDICAL DIRECTOR Well, you take it for him, Jerome. The Medical Director departs. Napoleon, stunned by the reprieve, approaches Jerome's work station and pretends to study the program on his computer screen. NAPOLEON Why did you do that? JEROME (exiting to the testing lab) Don't worry about it. INT. GATTACA - TESTING LAB. DAY. From behind we observe JEROME standing in front of LAMAR, issuing forth his steady stream of fraudulent urine. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE CORPORATION - WORKOUT CENTER. DAY. Twenty GATTACA EMPLOYEES, identically-outfitted men and women, run in a perfectly straight line towards the tranquil lake of the picturesque grounds, never getting any closer to their goal. They run at a steady 10mph on twenty identical state-of-the-art treadmill machines sunken into the floor and arranged in a uniform row facing a floor to ceiling window. The strain is beginning to show on many of the faces. The heartrate of each employee is monitored via a wireless electrode attached to the chest. Outside in the sunshine the next batch of twenty EMPLOYEES limbers up in readiness for their physical. JEROME's only preparation consists of thoughtfully dragging on a cigarette while staring out at the man-made lake. His nonchalant attitude disheartens nearby colleagues, including IRENE who is amongst a group of workers excused from the run by benevolent, over-protective TRAINERS. TRAINER You're excused, Irene. You may resume your duties. On the way into the work-out facility Jerome stubs out his cigarette in a stainless steel ashtray. Only we are aware of the slim credit card-sized recording device that he furtively slips out of his cigarette pack and secrets in his hand. As he takes his place on one of the treadmills and adheres the cordless electrode to his chest, Jerome surreptitiously attaches his device to the underside of the running machine's control panel. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. From a mezzanine floor above the work-out room, LAMAR, the medical officer, monitors computer read-outs displaying the pace and pulse of the runners on each treadmill machine. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT CENTER. DAY. One by one the GATTACA EMPLOYEES drop out until JEROME is the sole remaining runner. Several of the other employees stand around and watch Jerome run as they towel off. He appears under little duress, staring directly ahead, seemingly in a trance. As we focus on his chest, only we are aware of the sound of his furiously pounding heart making a lie of his calm exterior. INT. GATTACA - WORK-OUT OBSERVATION ROOM. DAY. Jerome's heart registers a far more measured beat on the computer in the observation room. The DIRECTOR is at LAMAR's shoulder, beaming proudly. LAMAR (marveling at Jerome's heartrate) Six miles later it's still beating like a Goddamn metronome. I could play piano by that heartbeat of his. The INVESTIGATOR and DETECTIVE HUGO enter the observation room, escorted by IRENE. DETECTIVE HUGO Director Josef, this is our lead Investigator. The two men exchange a polite handshake. However the Investigator is immediately taken with the SOLE RUNNER with his back to him, on the treadmill below. INVESTIGATOR How often do you test, Director? DIRECTOR JOSEF Often. INVESTIGATOR (intrigued) Surely you know what you have. DIRECTOR JOSEF We have to be certain. Once they're up, we can hardly turn the boat around. On the treadmill below, Jerome glances to his watch as he runs, the distress starting to show. Caught up in the conversation, Lamar has forgotten to end the work-out. Remembering, he finally presses the "WARM-DOWN" button, slowing the treadmill. LAMAR (still marveling at Jerome) I swear if I went to lunch and came back, he'd still be there. We focus on Jerome's recording device attached to the bottom of the control panel. It clicks to a stop, indicating that the bogus heartbeat recording has ended before the workout. The heartbeat monitor in the observation room suddenly races from 80 to 250 beats per minute. Lamar catches the discrepancy out of the corner of his eye but before he can take a second look, Jerome has whipped his electrode from his chest. The physician shrugs it off as a glitch in the machine. The Investigator has turned his back on Jerome to face the Director. INVESTIGATOR We believe we have a suspect. DIRECTOR JOSEF What a relief. INVESTIGATOR (referring to the profile of VINCENT on Hugo's computer notepad) This unaccountable specimen was found in the south wing corridor. In the room below, Jerome nonchalantly steps off the treadmill, stealthily retrieves the recording device from beneath the control panel and returns it to his cigarette pack. He casually wipes off drops of sweat from the machine with a towel, briefly glances to Irene with the Investigators and exits to the locker room. The Director idly regards the image of VINCENT on Hugo's handheld screen. He does not recognize the face. DETECTIVE HUGO An age enhancement is being prepared as we speak. DIRECTOR JOSEF (referring to his assistant) Irene will make it available to security. INT. GATTACA - LOCKER ROOM. DAY. JEROME wears his assured smile all the way along the corridor and into the now empty locker room. He exchanges a cheery greeting with an exiting COLLEAGUE, enters a shower stall, closes the door behind him and promptly collapses on the shower stall floor. The effects of the gruelling work-out are only now apparent. No longer sucking up the pain, he gulps air into his oxygen-starved lungs, his heart looking for a way through his tightened chest. He writhes in agony on the white-tiled floor - a brutal reminder of the physical frailty he seeks to disguise. EXT. GATTACA - GARDEN. LUNCHTIME. In Gattaca's perfectly landscaped gardens JEROME, dressed and recovered from his ordeal, joins his COLLEAGUES for lunch at one of the umbrella-covered tables. While most of the others pick at unappetizing salads and take their individualized medication, Jerome carries a steak sandwich on his tray. The sight of the juicy steak is greeted with envious looks from his colleagues. Jerome pretends not to notice and rubs it in by liberally sprinkling salt onto the meat. However when Jerome looks over towards IRENE, she avoids eye contact. When she abruptly gets up and leaves, Jerome follows - thinking twice before depositing the napkin in the nearby trashcan. A janitor reaches for the napkin. It is the Old Janitor, CAESAR, from Jerome's former life. CAESAR I'll take care of that for you, Mr Morrow. The two men exchange a conspiratorial smile. EXT. GATTACA - WIND FARM. AFTERNOON. A forest of wind turbines, supplying energy to the aerospace complex. However the blades of the turbines are motionless in the still afternoon. JEROME finally catches up with IRENE. She turns, unsurprised by his appearance. Standing beside her, he looks out over the complex as if he too has come for the view. JEROME (eyes fixed on the view) We were looking at each other. You stopped. Irene, also keeps her gaze ahead. IRENE I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything. JEROME (shrugging as if it makes no difference to him) We were just looking. IRENE I know about you. Jerome turns to her, startled, trying to read her face. Irene takes a deep breath and abruptly plucks a long, dark hair from her head. IRENE (offering the hair to Jerome) Here, take it. Jerome, confused, takes the hair - more in reflex than intent. IRENE (a challenge) If you're still interested, let me know. Jerome contemplates the hair in his fingers for a moment, then deliberately lets it fall to the grounf. JEROME (never taking his eyes from her) Sorry, the wind caught it. Irene meets his gaze. There is not a breath of wind. The hair lies, plainly visible on the ground. EXT. GATTACA AEROSPACE COMPLEX. AFTERNOON. As JEROME and IRENE walk between the wind turbines, Jerome pretends not to notice that Irene keeps furtively checking the pulse on her wrist. They pause in the shade. JEROME (as if making conversation) Have they found our friend? IRENE Friend? JEROME (shrugs) It was a mercy-killing after all. IRENE They found an eyelash. JEROME Where? IRENE In the South Wing. JEROME Does it have a name? IRENE Just some In-Valid. Vincent-- (trying to come up with the last name) --somebody. Jerome turns away to disguise his alarm. He quickly recovers. JEROME Perhaps we ought to celebrate, Irene. IRENE (a smile playing around her lips) You celebrate, Jerome? INT. EUGENE'S CONDO. NIGHT. EUGENE talks irritably on the phone, examining a container from a newly opened case of hair bleach. EUGENE (into phone) --I know what I ordered. I ordered "Honey Dawn" and you sent me "Summer Wheat". JEROME descends the staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He immediately goes to the refrigerator, removing trays of samples. Eugene abruptly hangs up the phone. JEROME (OC) Call German. EUGENE Any particular reason? JEROME (collecting up sample bags from the work bench) We can't stay here. EUGENE What are you talking about? JEROME They think I offed the Director. Eugene wheels himself over to Jerome, unconcerned. EUGENE What makes them think that? JEROME They found my eyelash. EUGENE (a flicker of anxiety) Where? JEROME In a corridor. EUGENE (blas once again) Could be worse. They could have found it in your eye. Jerome half-smiles despite the situation. JEROME (resuming his collection of samples) Come on--we're taking off. EUGENE I'm not going anywhere. Less than a week to go. Not on your life-- JEROME --You don't understand, they'll make the connection, they'll hoover again. We should cut our losses. EUGENE (angrily grabbing a tray from Jerome's hands) Where is your head, Jerome? You're acting like a guilty man. They won't marry the eyelash to you. They won't believe that one of their elite navigators could have suckered them for the last five years. JEROME They'll recognize me. EUGENE (scoffing) How could they recognize you? (referring to the torn photo of 20-year-old Vincent on the wall) I don't recognize you. Anyway, you don't have a choice. You run, you may as well sign a confession, turn us both in right now. No, we stick this out-- find out what we can but change nothing. This is a minor inconvenience is all it is. We've taken worse heat than this. (angry now) Jesus, if I'd known you were going to go belly up on me at the last fucking gasp, I wouldn't have bothered. You can't quit on me now. I've put too much into this. (returning the samples to the fridge) Besides, this stuff is mine. I had other offers, you know. I could have rented myself out to somebody with a spine. You want me to wheel in there and finish the job myself? (meeting Jerome's gaze) We'll take off all right, from pad 18 just like we planned. Jerome slumps down in a chair, Eugene's tirade starting to get to him. EUGENE And keep your lashes on your lids where they belong. How could you be so careless? JEROME I'm sorry. (reluctant admission) I think I was crying. Eugene is uncomfortable at the notion. EUGENE Well save those tears. Jerome shrugs awkwardly and pours them both a drink. JEROME You really had other offers? EUGENE (shrugs) I'm sure I could have. INT. CONDOMINIUM - INCINERATOR. NIGHT. The naked JEROME scrapes away at his skin with even greater ferocity than usual. After exiting the incinerator, he deposits all the incriminating trash he has collected during the day into the furnace and ignites the gas. INT. EUGENE'S CONDOMINIUM. NIGHT. From outside, a car horn sounds. JEROME, in a formal suit and spectacles, abruptly enters the condominium. He goes to a closet and starts searching through Eugene's clothes. JEROME Mind if I borrow a tie? EUGENE is more interested in the car parked outside the condominium. IRENE sits in a convertible Citroen DS, dressed in a classic but provocative black suit. Unaware that she is being observed she touches up her lipstick in the rearview mirror. EUGENE So it's not just the Hoovers who've got you rattled. JEROME You're the one who said not to change anything. She's my ear to the investigation. EUGENE (skeptical) Is that all? JEROME I've got enough on my mind without that. EUGENE If you say so. (referring to the ties in Jerome's hand) The stripe. JEROME (agreeing with the selection) Good choice. Jerome fumbles with the knot. From his chair, Eugene knots Jerome's tie for him. Jerome is intrigued that for once Eugene is abstaining - he has not touched his drink. JEROME Not thirsty? (referring to the fridge) We've got enough virgin samples to last us the week. EUGENE I don't feel too good. I think I'm still drunk from last night. JEROME Never stopped you before. (regarding Eugene's head) And for God's sake stop plucking your hair. Someone went to a lot of trouble to make sure you wouldn't go bald. EUGENE If I were you I'd worry about myself. (nodding to Jerome's spectacles) Haven't you forgotten something? Jerome pockets the spectacles and enters the bathroom for his contact lenses. The horn sounds outside the window a second time and Jerome hastily exits. We stay with Eugene. Irene catches a glimpse of him before he moves away from the window. Jerome emerges from the building. As the couple drive away, Eugene wheels himself to the full length mirror. He regards his own reflection for a moment and opens the mirror - a disguised door opening into the adjacent apartment. A cloud of condensed water vapor billows out. GERMAN, the DNA Broker, emerges with an ENGINEER. He sends the engineer on his way and joins Eugene at his desk. Eugene hands German a credit card that he wipes through his computer. GERMAN We still need to overhaul the back-up generator. (fixing Eugene with a penetrating stare) What's going on, Eugene, I thought he was going away, not you--you going on vacation? EUGENE (looking away) You got it, German. GERMAN (nodding thoughtfully) You deserve it. INT. CONCERT HALL - AUDITORIUM. NIGHT. JEROME and IRENE step over feet, apologizing as they go, eventually finding their seats in a box in a sold-out concert hall. On the stage below, a YOUNG PIANIST - a teenage prodigy - has already taken his place at the keys of a grand piano. The pianist removes his white gloves and begins to play - an extremely complex and beautiful piece we have never heard before. IRENE looks to JEROME. He is clearly caught up in the music. EXT. IN-VALID HOUSING PROJECT. NIGHT. The music from the piano recital continues | thin | How many times the word 'thin' appears in the text? | 2 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | have | How many times the word 'have' appears in the text? | 1 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | sick | How many times the word 'sick' appears in the text? | 1 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | five | How many times the word 'five' appears in the text? | 1 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | four | How many times the word 'four' appears in the text? | 3 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | o.s. | How many times the word 'o.s.' appears in the text? | 2 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | marry | How many times the word 'marry' appears in the text? | 1 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | walks | How many times the word 'walks' appears in the text? | 3 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | distinct | How many times the word 'distinct' appears in the text? | 0 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | strings | How many times the word 'strings' appears in the text? | 3 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | beauty | How many times the word 'beauty' appears in the text? | 0 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | manner | How many times the word 'manner' appears in the text? | 0 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | apprehensive | How many times the word 'apprehensive' appears in the text? | 1 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | struggles | How many times the word 'struggles' appears in the text? | 1 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | first | How many times the word 'first' appears in the text? | 2 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | putting | How many times the word 'putting' appears in the text? | 1 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | quickly | How many times the word 'quickly' appears in the text? | 1 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | their | How many times the word 'their' appears in the text? | 1 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | totally | How many times the word 'totally' appears in the text? | 2 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | window | How many times the word 'window' appears in the text? | 3 |
(on phone) But Bunny, you're perfect for this job! You're so good at organizing. His adrenalin is pumping. Ed pours some booze into his coffee. ED You know these people. I need all the transsexuals and transvestites you can get. (he sucks on his cigarette) No, I don't care if they're not actors. I want realism. I want this film to tell the truth! I've waited my whole life for this shot, and I'm not gonna blow it. There's a KNOCK at the door. Ed carries the phone on a long cord and answers it. Bela hurries in, smiling broadly. BELA Eddie, you got a new movie for me?! ED Yeah, it's gonna be a great picture! You'll love your character! (back into the phone) Bunny, Bela's here. Look, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites! I need transvestites! Ed hangs up and resumes typing. Bela is puzzled. BELA Eddie, what kind of movie is this? ED Well, It's about how people have two personalities. The side they show to the world, and then the secret person they hide inside. BELA (delighted) Oh, like Jekyll and Hyde! Ah, I've always wanted to play Jekyll and Hyde! I'm looking forward to this production. Ed stops typing. He pours Bela a drink. ED Ehh, your part's a little different. You're like the God that looks down on all the characters, and oversees everything. BELA I don't understand. ED Well... you control everyone's fate. You're like the puppetmaster. BELA (getting it) Ah, so I pull the strings! ED Yeah. You pull the strings -- (he suddenly gets a look) "Pull the strings"... hey, that's pretty good! Ed quickly starts typing again. CUT TO: INT. ED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Ed and Dolores sit at a card table, finishing up dinner. The dogs eat scraps below them. ED Wipe off your hands. I've got a little surprise for you... (he smiles nervously) I finished my script. Ed anxiously pulls out a pile of pages. Dolores looks in awe at the cover: "'GLEN OR GLENDA' By Edward D. Wood, Jr"" DOLORES Ed, I'm so proud! I'll read it as soon as I get home. ED (apprehensive) Well, I'd really like to know what you think. Why don't you go in the bedroom and take a look at it? I'll Wait... There's an uneasy moment between them. She senses something funny. Dolores takes the script and goes into the bedroom. The door closes. Ed starts pacing... DISSOLVE TO: INT. BEDROOM - LATER Dolores reads the script. She finishes the last page, then looks up. She is very shaken. Dolores stands. She grabs the door and opens it. THROUGH THE DOORWAY Ed stands somberly in drag. He's in a pantsuit, heels, and pink angora sweater. Dolores is totally rattled. She struggles for a response. DOLORES So that's where my sweater's been. Ed silently nods. DOLORES How long have you been doing this? ED Since I was a kid. My mom wanted a girl, so she used to dress me in girlie clothing. It just kinda became a habit. DOLORES Jesus Christ! And you never told me? ED This is my way of telling you -- DOLORES (furious) What, by putting it in a fuckin' script, for everyone to see?! What kind of sick mind would operate like that? Ed is terribly hurt. Dolores shakes tht script. DOLORES And what about this so-called "Barbara" character? It's obviously ME! I'm so embarrassed! This is our life! ED (quiet) Of course it is. And that's why you should play the part. DOLORES Oh! You got nerve, buddy. He calmly points at the script. ED It's a damn good role. DOLORES That's not the issue!! (she suddenly stops) Ugh! How can you act so casual, when you're dressed like that?! ED It takes me comfortable. DOLORES Oh, just like in the script! Ed smiles serenely. ED Exactly. (he takes her hand) So what do ya say? Do you wanna break up... or do you wanna do the movie with me? Dolores sighs. CUT TO: INT. SCREEN CLASSICS - DAY The hallway is filled with eager TRANSVESTITES. It's a very festive atmosphere, and Bunny tries to create some order. Inside the busy office, Paul types, and Conrad cranks a mimeograph machine. CONRAD It's good to have a job. Now I can get my phone reconnected. In a corner, Georgie angrily waves the script at Ed. GEORGIE I thought this was gonna be a sex- change film! ED (defensive) There's still a sex-change -- GEORGIE Yeah! Five pages right before it ends! The rest of the show is about some schmuck who likes angora sweaters. ED I don't think he's a schmuck. GEORGIE And what's with this new title?! My poster says "I CHANGED MY SEX"! ED So change the poster. Trust me, you'll be better off. This is a story that's gonna grab people. (he goes into a pitch) It's about this guy. He's crazy about this girl but he likes to wear dresses. Should he tell her? Should he not tell her? He's torn. George, this is DRAMA. Georgie throws up his hands GEORGIE Fine, shoot whatever baloney you want! I give up. Just make sure it's seven reels long. CUT TO: EXT. STREET - EARLY MORNING We are on location for Ed's first film! A SMALL CREW of a dozen unpacks the camera and reflectors from their cars. Ed's voice rises above the hubbub. ED (O.S.) Excuse me, could I have everyone's attention?! Could you gather around? I've got something to say. The crew members put down their things and gather in a circle. In the middle, we reveal Ed, in complete drag. Dress, nylons, pumps, lovely blonde wig... he's quite a sight. Like an eager Scoutmaster, he addresses his troops. ED Everybody, we're about to embark on quite a journey. Four days of hard work... but when it's over, we'll have a picture that'll entertain, enlighten, and maybe even move millions of people. A COUPLE GRIPS glance at each other. ED Now the only way we're gonna achieve all this is if we stay on schedule. Day one -- TODAY -- we'll start easy. We have eighteen silent scenes that can be shot quickly: Cars parking, Patrick's suicide, me strolling as a man, me strolling as a woman, etc. (beat) After lunch, we'll bring in the Inspector and the Doctor. The Doctor is very important to the plot, so we might have to spend time on retakes. But it's worth it. Scene totals for the first day is thirty-four. (he catches a breath) Day Two, we'll be a little busier -- Veteran CAMERAMAN BILL, an old guy with thick glasses, speaks. CAMERAMAN BILL Excuse me Eddie, I don't mean to interrupt... but I'm gettin' a little worried about those clouds. He points up. Everybody looks at the sky. The clouds are gray. Ed nods in agreement. ED Good thinkin'. We'll talk about Days Three and Four later. Now let's get that first shot off! It's Scene 17, Glenda looking in the window. THE CREW disperses. Ed quickly runs in his heels over to the burly make-up man, HARRY. ED Okay, do I need any touch-up? MAKE-UP MAN HARRY I'm telling ya, eyelashes are the way to go. ED (irritated) Harry, we've discussed this a million times. I don't want to look like a girl. I want to look like myself. MAKE-UP MAN MARRY (disgruntled) Fine. Then you look beautiful. Harry humorlessly powders Ed's nose. Ed turns away and suddenly SHOUTS into a giant megaphone. ED PLACES, EVERYONE! ROLL CAMERA! CAMERAMAN BILL (nonchalant) Rolling. WIDE Ed chucks the megaphone and runs crazily past the camera and behind a building. ED'S VOICE And -- ACTION! A pause, and then Ed, in character as Glenda, calm and dignified, steps out and walks down the sidewalk. Ed stops at a store window. He's totally in shadow. A grip grimaces. He TURNS ON a light Ed lights up. He looks in the window, admires a dress on display, then silently walks out of frame. A beat. Ed SCREAMS. ED And, CUT! PRINT IT! LET'S MOVE ON! CAMERAMAN BILL Don't you want a second take, for protection? ED (exhilarated) What's to protect? It was perfect! Suddenly a police car turns the corner. CREW MEMBER Cops! ED We don't have a permit. RUN! Everyone grabs equipment and takes off. WIPE TO: INT. LARCHMONT STUDIOS - DAY The company is now shooting inside a dinky soundstage. There are dirty mattresses tacked on the walls. They prep Bela's set: A fishnet-draped armchair in front of a flat. Ed is perched high in his director's chair, back in men's clothes. ED The set doesn't look right! It looks too... empty. Clutter it up. Put a skeleton in the corner. And what's that thing over there? PAUL MARCO I don't know. ED Well it looks good. Let's use it! Georgie hurriedly strides over. He holds the script. GEORGIE Ed! What's with these revised pages?! A scene in a smelting factory? A buffalo stampede?? Three-hundred soldiers storming Anzio Beach??! What's going on here? I can't afford to film this nonsense! ED Don't worry. We're not gonna film any of it. GEORGIE Then how's it gonna get in the picture?! ED I know a guy in Universal's stock house -- he's giving me the footage for free. This movie's gonna look like a million bucks. Georgie nods. Oh, okay. O.S. VOICE Mr. Lugosi has arrived! Ed jumps excitedly. ED Oh my God! (he YELLS) Mr. Lugosi is here! Now everyone, when he walks on the stage (nobody is listening; so Ed uses his MEGAPHONE) Now everyone, when he walks on the stage, treat him normal. I know Bela Lugosi is a world-famous star, and you're all a little excited, but we're professionals. So if you treat him with respect, everything will be alright. AT THE STAGE DOOR The door swings open, and Bela strides in, looking dapper. He glances at the teensy stage, and his face falls imperceptibly. Ed runs up, bounding with enthusiasm. ED Bela! It's so great to see you! (he glances at his watch) And eight o'clock on the dot. Right on time! BELA I am always on time. ED Of course! Well, we got a big day planned for you... First, we're gonna start off a little easy, with you in that armchair over there. Then, once you're up to speed and cooking, we'll reset and bring out the laboratory equipment -- BELA (he leans in and WHISPERS) Uh, Eddie, do you have my money? ED Huh?! Oh yeah, of course. Ed and Bela step over to a corner. ACROSS THE ROOM From a distance, Ed pulls a wad of money from his pocket and peels off a few bills for Bela. The crew watches, fascinated. WIPE TO: LATER Bela is seated in the ratty armchair on the set. Harry does his make-up. Harry glances at Bela's arm, and it is full of TRACK MARKS. Harry grimaces, but doesn't say anything. Conrad eagerly scurries up. CONRAD Mr. Lugosi, I know you're very busy, but could I have your autograph? BELA (cordial) Of course. Conrad hands him a scrap of paper. Bela signs it. CONRAD You know which movie of yours I love, Mr. Lugosi? "The Invisible Ray." You were great as Karloff's sidekick. Bela's face suddenly hardens. He snaps. BELA "Sidekick"?? "KARLOFF"?!! Bela insanely RIPS up the autograph. BELA Fuck you!! Karloff doesn't deserve to smell my shit! That limey cocksucker can rot in hell, for all I care!!! WIDE Ed panickedly runs up. ED What happened?! Jesus, Connie, what did you do? CONRAD (upset, close to crying) Nothin'! I told him he was great. BELA How dare that asshole bring up Karloff?!! You think it takes talent to play Frankenstein?! NO! It's just make-up and grunting! GRRR! GRRR! GRRR! Ed is frozen in fear. He glances across the stage. Georgie is flabbergasted. He points urgently at his watch. Ed nods. He motions to Conrad: Get out of here. Conrad runs away. Ed leans in to Bela. ED You're right, Bela. Now Dracula, that's a part that takes acting. BELA Of course! Dracula requires presence. It's all in the voice, and the eyes, and the hand -- Bela waves his outstretched arm. Ed tries to calm him. ED Look, you seem a little agitated. Do you maybe wanna take a little break, go for a nice walk... and then we'll come back and shoot the scene? BELA BULLSHIT! I am ready now! Roll the camera!! The crew is baffled. Ed shrugs at them. ED Um, okay... roll camera CAMERAMAN BILL (unsure) Rolling. ED Sound! SOUNDMAN Speed. CAMERA ASSISTANT Mark. Scene Thirty-One. The Assistant CLAPS the slate in front of Bela, then runs. ED And... action? It's dead quiet. Nobody knows what's about to happen. WE MOVE IN TO BELA. And... he suddenly assumes character. Like the consumate pro he is. Bela gets a wicked, sinister leer, then starts intoning threateningly: BELA (as the SPIRIT) "Beware. Beware! Beware, of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys! Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware. Take care. Beware!" CLOSEUP - ED He is blown away. He quietly mumbles in amazement. ED Brilliant. WIPE TO: INT. STAGE - NEXT DAY Dolores studies her script, as the crew lights a flimsy kitchen set. Ed strolls past, nonchalantly removing a ladies' wig and earrings. She stares in disbelief. DOLORES How can you just walk around like that, in front of all these people? ED Hon', nobody's bothered but you. (he gestures) Look around -- they couldn't care less. DOLORES Ed, this isn't the real world! You've surrounded yourself with WEIRDOS! ED Say it a little louder. I don't think Bela heard you in his trailer. Dolores quiets down. She feels bad. ED Dolores. I need your help... WIPE TO: FILMING IN PROGRESS - LATER A scene is being shot, on camera. Ed (as Glen) and Dolores (as Barbara) stare into each other's eyes. He's dressed normal, and she wears a fuzzy angora sweater. ED (as GLEN) "My mind's in a muddle. I thought I could stop wearing these things. I tried, honestly I tried..." DOLORES (as BARBARA) (tentative) "Glen, I don't fully understand this. But maybe together -- we can work it out." She stands up, dramatically takes off her angora sweater, and gives it to Ed. He holds it meaningfully, then smiles proudly. ED Music swells... and CUT and PRINT IT! Ed and Dolores hug. CUT TO: INT. EDITING ROOM - DAY On a MOVIOLA, we see the black-and-white image of Dolores taking off her angora and giving it to Ed. WE PULL OUT. Ed and Georgie are hunched over, watching the movie. Ed smiles proudly. ED And we fade out. "The End." (the film runs out) What do you think? Georgie peers at his watch. He shakes his bead. GEORGIE I think it's fifty-seven minutes long. ED Yeah? Whatever. So did you like it? GEORGIE (like a lecturing teacher) Ed, what was the one thing I asked you to do? Make it seven reels long. I've got contracts with my exhibitors. If it ain't over an hour, they won't play it. ED Gee, I used every frame of film we shot. Maybe they won't notice. GEORGIE They'll notice. (beat) Look, why don't you let me take over from here? I can do a few tricks: Pad it out with more stock footage, add establishing shots... ED Um, I guess -- GEORGIE Good. And one more thing. I think your "Written, Directed, and Starring Ed Wood" credit is a bad idea. ED Why?! I did all those things! Hell, I even built the props. GEORGIE And you did a bang-up job, too. But you don't want other producers to know that's you in drag. Trust me. It's a career killer. Ed is quite upset. ED But I'm proud. I wrote, directed, and starred in it just like Orson Welles in "Citizen Kane"! GEORGIE Yeah?? Well Orson Welles didn't wear angora sweaters, did he??! Ed is beaten. CUT TO: INT. SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT It's the cast and crew screening! The eager two-dozen people are packed into a tiny screening room. The lights dim, and the movie starts. A LIBRARY MUSIC fanfare, and then: "Bela Lugosi in GLEN OR GLENDA" Everyone APPLAUDS excitedly. Bela smiles. Credits continue: "Featuring Daniel Davis and Dolores Fuller" The audience is audibly baffled. Bunny BLURTS out. BUNNY Daniel Who?! Dolores leans in to Ed. DOLORES Ed, who is Daniel Davis? ED (sour) Some weirdo who likes to wear dresses. DISSOLVE TO: LATER IN THE MOVIE ON-SCREEN, Dolores looks tenderly at Ed. DOLORES (on screen) "Glen. Is it another woman?" Ed as Glen nervously ponders his response. But suddenly -- MUSIC THUNDERS in. The movie cuts to buffalo stampeding. Bela's angry face is superimposed over this. BELA (on screen) "Pull the string! Pull the string!" IN THE AUDIENCE People are impressed by this technique. Bela nods in approval. ON-SCREEN Out of nowhere, CHEAP JAZZ MUSIC starts, and the movie abruptly cuts to SLEAZY STAG PARTY-STYLE FOOTAGE! A bare-chested man whips a bound woman! A woman dominates another tied to a large stick! A brunette violently rips off her dress and does a hoochie-coochie dance! IN THE AUDIENCE The crowd is stunned. CAMERAMAN BILL I didn't shoot that! Ed looks back at Georgie, who's wearing a big satisfied grin. ED Georgie, what's with the stag footage?? You said you were cutting in establishing shots! GEORGIE I did. I established some tits and ass. Ed rolls his eyes. He turns back to the movie. INT. PARTY - LATER THAT NIGHT Everybody is CELEBRATING, with a raucous party. People are boozing it up. BIG BAND MUSIC plays. Ed dances with Dolores. Paul smokes a joint. Conrad falls over a table and breaks a lamp. Bela dances happily with a cute young REDHEAD. BELA Wasn't I something..? Did you see how I command the screen?! Ed's giddy buddies stumble over with foaming glasses of beer. BUNNY Ed, it was superb. CONRAD A great show! A little strange... but great -- especially my scenes. ED Just like I always promised. Now you're among the immortals. You're movie stars. PAUL MARCO (he raises his glass) Here's to Ed. For making us into something. It's a warm moment. They all CLINK their glasses. Dolores kisses Ed. CUT TO: EXT. BUNGALOW HOUSE - DAY We're outside a cute little Spanish bungalow house. Ed and Dolores are moving in. They lug furniture from a rented truck. ED From today on, our lives are different! We'll be swimming laps in the same pool Jean Harlow did. DOLORES I don't know. It's so much money... ED Who cares?! We're on a ROLL! These are the moments in life you're supposed to grab. DOLORES But Ed, we're not even married. And you don't have a job. ED But you do! And anyway, I've got tons of new scripts. And now that I have a track record, studios are bound to hire me! She just stares. Ed shrugs, semi-reassuringly. ED Look on the bright side. If we miss the rent, what's the worst they can do? DOLORES Toss us out on our ass. ED Exactly. INT. BUNGALOW - DAY The house is moved in. Ed's unkempt dogs run about. Pumped-up Ed sits on the bed typing fiendishly fast while wearing an angora sweater. A cigarette dangles from his mouth, and a bottle of booze lays in his lap. Bela sits quietly nearby. ED How 'bout a western? People love westerns. BELA But, I don't like horses. Do I have to get on one? ED Eh, forget it. What else is big? (his face lights up) Teenagers! Jailbait pics! Yeah... You got the juvenile delinquent, his girlfriend from the wrong side of the tracks -- BELA Who do I play? ED Uh, a cop. NO! You play the father. He's angry! He doesn't like seeing his son -- no -- he doesn't like seeing his daughter behave this way! BELA (cautious, not to offend) Well... can't I play the romantic part? I'm tired of always being the bad guy. You know, back in Hungary, I played Romeo! I would like to be the lover again -- me, in a boat, with the girl... Ed considers this. ED Sure. Romance, that's great! To engineer your comeback, we're gonna need a whole slate of pictures. Once "Glen Or Glenda" takes off, we'll slam you into one, then another, then another! BELA (he smiles) That's good. I could use the money. ED But we need to start off with a bang! Something we know the audience will want to see. Mmm. What was your biggest hit? BELA (he thinks) Hmm... my biggest hit? That would probably be "Dracula." ED Of course! Ed crabs a pen and excitedly scrawls out the word "DRACULA." Bela frowns. BELA Those bastards at Universal. I made so much money for them, and now I can't get the time of day. ED So let's make another "Dracula." Let's make "The Return of Dracula"! BELA We can't. Those sons-a-bitches control the rights. ED They do? Shoot. There must be a way to get around that... Ed's mind is working. He holds out the paper and stares at it. Suddenly, he grins. He grabs the pen and makes a period after the "DR." It now says "DR.ACULA" ED Ha-ha! Dr. Acula! BELA Dracula? ED No! Doctor Acula! You can still wear the cape, have the fangs... but you're a doctor! Not a count. BELA Ah! This is very exciting. ED (inspired) I gotta type this up, while it's still fresh! Ed rips the paper from his typewriter, puts in a blank page, and starts typing. CUT TO: EXT. MOVIE STUDIO GATE - DAY We're outside the imposing gates of MGM. The lion logo is overhead. Ed drives up in his dirty Nash Rambler convertible. He wears his nicest suit. Ed peers nervously at the GUARD. ED Excuse me, I'm here to see Mr. Feldman. The Guard stares suspiciously at Ed. His filthy car is leaking oil. GUARD What's your name? ED Edward D. Wood, Junior. The man frowns. He looks through his files -- then finds a parking slip with Ed's name. He is surprised. GUARD Oh. Eh, he's in the Executive Building. You can park in the reserved section. Ed smiles. INT. EXECUTIVE WAITING ROOM - DAY The room is very posh, with fancy paneling and marble floors. Ed sits nervously under posters for "GRAND HOTEL" and "QUO VADIS." Film cans labled "Glen Or Glenda" rest in his lap. SECRETARY Sir, Mr. Feldman will see you now. She hits an electric button. A large oak door swings open. INT. OFFICE Behind a giant desk is MR. FELDMAN, a glib, thin over- caffeinated man. He jumps up, smiling. MR. FELDMAN Mr. Ward, it's a delight to meet you. ED (shaking his hand) It's Wood. Ed Wood. MR. FELDMAN Wood? Ward? Wood. (puzzled, he glances at his appointment book) Hey, what do you know. It is Wood. Dang secretaries, you can never get a good one. Right? Ed shrugs. Feldman grins. MR. FELDMAN So what are you bringing me? Looks like you got some film cans. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, some people have resumes to show. I've got my own movie. MR. FELDMAN Really?! Well good for you. ED I just made this picture, over at Screen Classics. It opens next week. MR. FELDMAN Screen Classics? Hmm, don't know them. ED Nobody in town has seen it, so I'm givin' you first crack at my talents. MR. FELDMAN I can't wait to take a look. (he claps his hands) So what's up next? Ed leans in. ED Well, Mr. Feldman, I don't believe in thinking small. So I've got a whole slate of pictures for you: "The Vampire's Tomb," "The Ghoul Goes West"... and "Doctor Acula"! MR. FELDMAN Doctor Acula? I don't get it. ED Dr. Acula! Ed writes it out, "DR. ACULA," then waves it in Feldman's face. Feldman nods. MR. FELDMAN Oh, "Dr. Acula." I get it. (beat) I don't like it. ED But Bela Lugosi's in it! MR. FELDMAN Lugosi's washed-up. What else you got? Ed grimaces. Lugosi was 90% of his pitch. He vamps. ED Well... I've got another project I wasn't gonna tell you about. Lugosi's in it, but he's got a smaller part. The lead is an ingenue, a sterling young actress named Dolores Fuller. The title is "Bride Of The Atom." MR. FELDMAN Ah! Atomic Age stuff, huh? I like it. (he smiles) I'll tell you what, Mr. Ward. Why don't you leave those film cans, and my associates and I will take a look at your little opus. Maybe we can do business together. Ed is elated. INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM - DAY Feldman and his fellow SMARMY EXECUTIVES sit in a plush screening room. They are viewing "Glen Or Glenda." ON-SCREEN, Ed is in drag. A SOLEMN NARRATOR within the movie speaks: SOLEMN NARRATOR (V.O.) "Give this man satin undies, a dress, and a sweater... and he's the happiest man in the world. He can work better, think better, even play better -- and be more of a credit to his community and his government." ANGLE ON THE EXECUTIVES They are stupefied. Yikes! EXECUTIVE #1 What the hell is this?! EXECUTIVE #2 Is this an actual movie?! EXECUTIVE #1 It can't be. EXECUTIVE #2 It's fuckin' ridiculous! Feldman squints at the screen. FELDMAN Wait a minute. That guy in the dress -- he's the one I met with today! This must be a big PUT-ON! (he CHUCKLES) It's probably another one of Billy Wellman's practical jokes! Everybody suddenly starts HOWLING with laughter. CUT TO: EXT. NEWSSTAND - DAY Ed zooms up and chipperly jumps from his car. He buys a "Los Angeles Herald-Express," eagerly opens it to the entertainment pages... and then gets a confused look. Ed quickly starts rifling through the pages -- something is wrong. EXT. PHONE BOOTH - DAY Ed angrily shouts into the phone. ED Georgie, what happened?! I thought "Glen Or Glenda" was opening next week! Where's the ads? An OLD-FASHIONED SPLIT SCREEN of Georgie on the phone appears. GEORGIE (pissed-off) "Where's the ads"?! The ads are in Alabama, Indiana, and Missouri! You schmuck, it ain't gonna play L.A.! ED Why not?? GEORGIE Because I can't sell it to save my life! You made a goddamn feathered fish. Is it an art film, a horror show, a hygiene flick? Nobody knows! I'm beggin' people to book it. ED (insulted) Maybe it needs special handling. GEORGIE Screw you, Wood! I even sunk more money into different titles: "Transvestite" "He Or She?" "I Led Two Lives"... It DOESN'T MATTER! Nobody wants to see the piece of shit. ED You can't talk that way about my movie. GEORGIE "Your movie"?! I wish it was your movie! I wish I hadn't blown every dime I ever made into this stinkbomb. If I ever see you again, I'll kill you!!! Georgie SLAMS down the phone. His split screen WIPES off, leaving Ed standing alone. Ed stares at the phone, then quietly hangs it up. CUT TO: INT. OLYMPIC AUDITORIUM - NIGHT WHAM! A WRESTLER throws another WRESTLER at the mat. The crowd CHEERS raucously. We're at the Saturday Night Wrestling Matches! In the stands are Ed, Dolores, Bunny, and Bunny's new YOUNG MALE "FRIEND." Seated around them are hollering truckers and ex-Marines. Bunny giggles and nudges gloomy Ed. BUNNY So guess where I'm going next weekend? ED I don't know. Where? BUNNY Mexico! And guess what I'm going to do there?! ED (not enjoying this game) I dunno. Lie on the beach? BUNNY WRONG! I'm getting my first series of hormone shots! And once those babies kick in, they're gonna remove my organs, and MAKE ME A WOMAN! Ed is astonished. ED Jesus! Are you serious? BUNNY Yes! I've dreamed of it for years, but your movie made me realize I've got to take action. GOODBYE, PENIS! The truckers nearby stare. Dolores covers her face. DOLORES Ssh! Will you keep it down? The crowd suddenly ROARS and jumps up. A favorite wrestler has entered the ring, massive TOR JOHNSON, 50. Tor is an incredible sight: A bald, lumbering behemoth. RING ANNOUNCER (amplified) Now entering the ring, in the gold trunks, 350 bone-crunching pounds of pure strength, the "Swedish Angel"... Tor Johnson!!! The crowd goes apeshit. The stands are going to collapse from the SHOUTING. Ed's eyes are the size of saucers. ED My God, look at that guy. He's a mountain! The bell RINGS. Tor quickly grabs his OPPONENT, a man in a blue mask, and throws him at the ground. Then Tor jumps onto his stomach, easily picks him up, and heaves him at the ropes. People CHEER. Ed is flabbergasted. ED I've never seen anything like him! BUNNY And once I'm a woman, Jean-Claude and I are getting married -- ED (eyes glued to the ring) Ssh! He's so big! He's a monster! Can you imagine what that guy would be like in a movie? ON TOR He screams maniacally in Swedish. Tor lifts the Opponent over his head and tosses him into the stands. Three rows of chairs get knocked over. CUT TO: EXT. WRESTLER'S BAR - NIGHT A tiny miniature European car pulls up. Tor Johnson is squeezed inside -- ludicrously oversized for this vehicle. Tor carefully wedges himself out and enters the bar. INT. WRESTLER'S BAR - SAME TIME This rowdy bar is packed with burly WRESTLERS. Tor walks in, and men cheerily yell out: "Hey, Tor!" "Hi, Tor!" Tor grins. In person, he actually seems a jolly, outgoing fellow. Ed waves from the corner ED Mr. Johnson, over here! Tor smiles and lumbers over ED Glad you could fit me in your schedule. TOR (in a hoarse SWEDISH ACCENT) Da pleasure be mine. They shake hands. Ed's hands look like a baby's in | beautiful | How many times the word 'beautiful' appears in the text? | 1 |
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What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. 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[-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | set | How many times the word 'set' appears in the text? | 2 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1249] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* ******This file should be named 1249.txt or 1249.zip****** Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, anthm10a.txt This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. Box 2782 Champaign, IL 61825 When all other email fails try our Executive Director: Michael S. Hart We would prefer to send you this information by email (Internet, Bitnet, Compuserve, ATTMAIL or MCImail). ****** If you have an FTP program (or emulator), please FTP directly to the Project Gutenberg archives: [Mac users, do NOT point and click. . .type] ftp uiarchive.cso.uiuc.edu login: anonymous password: your@login cd etext/etext90 through /etext96 or cd etext/articles [get suggest gut for more information] dir [to see files] get or mget [to get files. . .set bin for zip files] GET INDEX?00.GUT for a list of books and GET NEW GUT for general information and MGET GUT* for newsletters. **Information prepared by the Project Gutenberg legal advisor** (Three Pages) ***START**THE SMALL PRINT!**FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS**START*** Why is this "Small Print!" statement here? You know: lawyers. They tell us you might sue us if there is something wrong with your copy of this etext, even if you got it for free from someone other than us, and even if what's wrong is not our fault. So, among other things, this "Small Print!" statement disclaims most of our liability to you. It also tells you how you can distribute copies of this etext if you want to. *BEFORE!* YOU USE OR READ THIS ETEXT By using or reading any part of this PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, you indicate that you understand, agree to and accept this "Small Print!" statement. If you do not, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for this etext by sending a request within 30 days of receiving it to the person you got it from. If you received this etext on a physical medium (such as a disk), you must return it with your request. ABOUT PROJECT GUTENBERG-TM ETEXTS This PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, like most PROJECT GUTENBERG- tm etexts, is a "public domain" work distributed by Professor Michael S. 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LIMITED WARRANTY; DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES But for the "Right of Replacement or Refund" described below, [1] the Project (and any other party you may receive this etext from as a PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext) disclaims all liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal fees, and [2] YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE OR UNDER STRICT LIABILITY, OR FOR BREACH OF WARRANTY OR CONTRACT, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR INCIDENTAL DAMAGES, EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGES. If you discover a Defect in this etext within 90 days of receiving it, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending an explanatory note within that time to the person you received it from. If you received it on a physical medium, you must return it with your note, and such person may choose to alternatively give you a replacement copy. 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You may however, if you wish, distribute this etext in machine readable binary, compressed, mark-up, or proprietary form, including any form resulting from conversion by word pro- cessing or hypertext software, but only so long as *EITHER*: [*] The etext, when displayed, is clearly readable, and does *not* contain characters other than those intended by the author of the work, although tilde (~), asterisk (*) and underline (_) characters may be used to convey punctuation intended by the author, and additional characters may be used to indicate hypertext links; OR [*] The etext may be readily converted by the reader at no expense into plain ASCII, EBCDIC or equivalent form by the program that displays the etext (as is the case, for instance, with most word processors); OR [*] You provide, or agree to also provide on request at no additional cost, fee or expense, a copy of the etext in its original plain ASCII form (or in EBCDIC or other equivalent proprietary form). [2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. 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[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. [-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | versions | How many times the word 'versions' appears in the text? | 2 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1249] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* ******This file should be named 1249.txt or 1249.zip****** Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, anthm10a.txt This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. Box 2782 Champaign, IL 61825 When all other email fails try our Executive Director: Michael S. Hart We would prefer to send you this information by email (Internet, Bitnet, Compuserve, ATTMAIL or MCImail). ****** If you have an FTP program (or emulator), please FTP directly to the Project Gutenberg archives: [Mac users, do NOT point and click. . .type] ftp uiarchive.cso.uiuc.edu login: anonymous password: your@login cd etext/etext90 through /etext96 or cd etext/articles [get suggest gut for more information] dir [to see files] get or mget [to get files. . .set bin for zip files] GET INDEX?00.GUT for a list of books and GET NEW GUT for general information and MGET GUT* for newsletters. **Information prepared by the Project Gutenberg legal advisor** (Three Pages) ***START**THE SMALL PRINT!**FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS**START*** Why is this "Small Print!" statement here? You know: lawyers. They tell us you might sue us if there is something wrong with your copy of this etext, even if you got it for free from someone other than us, and even if what's wrong is not our fault. So, among other things, this "Small Print!" statement disclaims most of our liability to you. It also tells you how you can distribute copies of this etext if you want to. *BEFORE!* YOU USE OR READ THIS ETEXT By using or reading any part of this PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, you indicate that you understand, agree to and accept this "Small Print!" statement. If you do not, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for this etext by sending a request within 30 days of receiving it to the person you got it from. If you received this etext on a physical medium (such as a disk), you must return it with your request. ABOUT PROJECT GUTENBERG-TM ETEXTS This PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, like most PROJECT GUTENBERG- tm etexts, is a "public domain" work distributed by Professor Michael S. 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LIMITED WARRANTY; DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES But for the "Right of Replacement or Refund" described below, [1] the Project (and any other party you may receive this etext from as a PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext) disclaims all liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal fees, and [2] YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE OR UNDER STRICT LIABILITY, OR FOR BREACH OF WARRANTY OR CONTRACT, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR INCIDENTAL DAMAGES, EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGES. If you discover a Defect in this etext within 90 days of receiving it, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending an explanatory note within that time to the person you received it from. If you received it on a physical medium, you must return it with your note, and such person may choose to alternatively give you a replacement copy. If you received it electronically, such person may choose to alternatively give you a second opportunity to receive it electronically. THIS ETEXT IS OTHERWISE PROVIDED TO YOU "AS-IS". NO OTHER WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, ARE MADE TO YOU AS TO THE ETEXT OR ANY MEDIUM IT MAY BE ON, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE. Some states do not allow disclaimers of implied warranties or the exclusion or limitation of consequential damages, so the above disclaimers and exclusions may not apply to you, and you may have other legal rights. INDEMNITY You will indemnify and hold the Project, its directors, officers, members and agents harmless from all liability, cost and expense, including legal fees, that arise directly or indirectly from any of the following that you do or cause: [1] distribution of this etext, [2] alteration, modification, or addition to the etext, or [3] any Defect. 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You may however, if you wish, distribute this etext in machine readable binary, compressed, mark-up, or proprietary form, including any form resulting from conversion by word pro- cessing or hypertext software, but only so long as *EITHER*: [*] The etext, when displayed, is clearly readable, and does *not* contain characters other than those intended by the author of the work, although tilde (~), asterisk (*) and underline (_) characters may be used to convey punctuation intended by the author, and additional characters may be used to indicate hypertext links; OR [*] The etext may be readily converted by the reader at no expense into plain ASCII, EBCDIC or equivalent form by the program that displays the etext (as is the case, for instance, with most word processors); OR [*] You provide, or agree to also provide on request at no additional cost, fee or expense, a copy of the etext in its original plain ASCII form (or in EBCDIC or other equivalent proprietary form). [2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. 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[-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | domestic | How many times the word 'domestic' appears in the text? | 0 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1249] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* ******This file should be named 1249.txt or 1249.zip****** Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, anthm10a.txt This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. 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What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. 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If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. 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[-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | newspapers | How many times the word 'newspapers' appears in the text? | 0 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. 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What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. 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If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. 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[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. [-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | files | How many times the word 'files' appears in the text? | 1 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. 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What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. 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If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. 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[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. [-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | his | How many times the word 'his' appears in the text? | 0 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1249] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* ******This file should be named 1249.txt or 1249.zip****** Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, anthm10a.txt This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. 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What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. 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If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. 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They tell us you might sue us if there is something wrong with your copy of this etext, even if you got it for free from someone other than us, and even if what's wrong is not our fault. So, among other things, this "Small Print!" statement disclaims most of our liability to you. It also tells you how you can distribute copies of this etext if you want to. *BEFORE!* YOU USE OR READ THIS ETEXT By using or reading any part of this PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, you indicate that you understand, agree to and accept this "Small Print!" statement. If you do not, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for this etext by sending a request within 30 days of receiving it to the person you got it from. If you received this etext on a physical medium (such as a disk), you must return it with your request. ABOUT PROJECT GUTENBERG-TM ETEXTS This PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, like most PROJECT GUTENBERG- tm etexts, is a "public domain" work distributed by Professor Michael S. 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[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. [-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | except | How many times the word 'except' appears in the text? | 0 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1249] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* ******This file should be named 1249.txt or 1249.zip****** Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, anthm10a.txt This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. 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[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. Box 2782 Champaign, IL 61825 When all other email fails try our Executive Director: Michael S. Hart We would prefer to send you this information by email (Internet, Bitnet, Compuserve, ATTMAIL or MCImail). ****** If you have an FTP program (or emulator), please FTP directly to the Project Gutenberg archives: [Mac users, do NOT point and click. . .type] ftp uiarchive.cso.uiuc.edu login: anonymous password: your@login cd etext/etext90 through /etext96 or cd etext/articles [get suggest gut for more information] dir [to see files] get or mget [to get files. . .set bin for zip files] GET INDEX?00.GUT for a list of books and GET NEW GUT for general information and MGET GUT* for newsletters. **Information prepared by the Project Gutenberg legal advisor** (Three Pages) ***START**THE SMALL PRINT!**FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS**START*** Why is this "Small Print!" statement here? You know: lawyers. They tell us you might sue us if there is something wrong with your copy of this etext, even if you got it for free from someone other than us, and even if what's wrong is not our fault. So, among other things, this "Small Print!" statement disclaims most of our liability to you. It also tells you how you can distribute copies of this etext if you want to. *BEFORE!* YOU USE OR READ THIS ETEXT By using or reading any part of this PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, you indicate that you understand, agree to and accept this "Small Print!" statement. If you do not, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for this etext by sending a request within 30 days of receiving it to the person you got it from. If you received this etext on a physical medium (such as a disk), you must return it with your request. ABOUT PROJECT GUTENBERG-TM ETEXTS This PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, like most PROJECT GUTENBERG- tm etexts, is a "public domain" work distributed by Professor Michael S. 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[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. [-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | used | How many times the word 'used' appears in the text? | 1 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1249] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* ******This file should be named 1249.txt or 1249.zip****** Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, anthm10a.txt This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. 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[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. 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They tell us you might sue us if there is something wrong with your copy of this etext, even if you got it for free from someone other than us, and even if what's wrong is not our fault. So, among other things, this "Small Print!" statement disclaims most of our liability to you. It also tells you how you can distribute copies of this etext if you want to. *BEFORE!* YOU USE OR READ THIS ETEXT By using or reading any part of this PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, you indicate that you understand, agree to and accept this "Small Print!" statement. If you do not, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for this etext by sending a request within 30 days of receiving it to the person you got it from. If you received this etext on a physical medium (such as a disk), you must return it with your request. ABOUT PROJECT GUTENBERG-TM ETEXTS This PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, like most PROJECT GUTENBERG- tm etexts, is a "public domain" work distributed by Professor Michael S. 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[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. [-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | she | How many times the word 'she' appears in the text? | 0 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1249] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* ******This file should be named 1249.txt or 1249.zip****** Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, anthm10a.txt This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. Box 2782 Champaign, IL 61825 When all other email fails try our Executive Director: Michael S. Hart We would prefer to send you this information by email (Internet, Bitnet, Compuserve, ATTMAIL or MCImail). ****** If you have an FTP program (or emulator), please FTP directly to the Project Gutenberg archives: [Mac users, do NOT point and click. . .type] ftp uiarchive.cso.uiuc.edu login: anonymous password: your@login cd etext/etext90 through /etext96 or cd etext/articles [get suggest gut for more information] dir [to see files] get or mget [to get files. . .set bin for zip files] GET INDEX?00.GUT for a list of books and GET NEW GUT for general information and MGET GUT* for newsletters. **Information prepared by the Project Gutenberg legal advisor** (Three Pages) ***START**THE SMALL PRINT!**FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS**START*** Why is this "Small Print!" statement here? You know: lawyers. 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What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. 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[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. [-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | correct | How many times the word 'correct' appears in the text? | 1 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1249] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* ******This file should be named 1249.txt or 1249.zip****** Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, anthm10a.txt This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. Box 2782 Champaign, IL 61825 When all other email fails try our Executive Director: Michael S. Hart We would prefer to send you this information by email (Internet, Bitnet, Compuserve, ATTMAIL or MCImail). ****** If you have an FTP program (or emulator), please FTP directly to the Project Gutenberg archives: [Mac users, do NOT point and click. . .type] ftp uiarchive.cso.uiuc.edu login: anonymous password: your@login cd etext/etext90 through /etext96 or cd etext/articles [get suggest gut for more information] dir [to see files] get or mget [to get files. . .set bin for zip files] GET INDEX?00.GUT for a list of books and GET NEW GUT for general information and MGET GUT* for newsletters. **Information prepared by the Project Gutenberg legal advisor** (Three Pages) ***START**THE SMALL PRINT!**FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS**START*** Why is this "Small Print!" statement here? You know: lawyers. They tell us you might sue us if there is something wrong with your copy of this etext, even if you got it for free from someone other than us, and even if what's wrong is not our fault. So, among other things, this "Small Print!" statement disclaims most of our liability to you. It also tells you how you can distribute copies of this etext if you want to. *BEFORE!* YOU USE OR READ THIS ETEXT By using or reading any part of this PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, you indicate that you understand, agree to and accept this "Small Print!" statement. If you do not, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for this etext by sending a request within 30 days of receiving it to the person you got it from. If you received this etext on a physical medium (such as a disk), you must return it with your request. ABOUT PROJECT GUTENBERG-TM ETEXTS This PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, like most PROJECT GUTENBERG- tm etexts, is a "public domain" work distributed by Professor Michael S. 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What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. 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[-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | fool!--to | How many times the word 'fool!--to' appears in the text? | 0 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1249] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* ******This file should be named 1249.txt or 1249.zip****** Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, anthm10a.txt This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. Box 2782 Champaign, IL 61825 When all other email fails try our Executive Director: Michael S. Hart We would prefer to send you this information by email (Internet, Bitnet, Compuserve, ATTMAIL or MCImail). ****** If you have an FTP program (or emulator), please FTP directly to the Project Gutenberg archives: [Mac users, do NOT point and click. . .type] ftp uiarchive.cso.uiuc.edu login: anonymous password: your@login cd etext/etext90 through /etext96 or cd etext/articles [get suggest gut for more information] dir [to see files] get or mget [to get files. . .set bin for zip files] GET INDEX?00.GUT for a list of books and GET NEW GUT for general information and MGET GUT* for newsletters. **Information prepared by the Project Gutenberg legal advisor** (Three Pages) ***START**THE SMALL PRINT!**FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS**START*** Why is this "Small Print!" statement here? You know: lawyers. 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What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. 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[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. [-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | find | How many times the word 'find' appears in the text? | 1 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1249] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* ******This file should be named 1249.txt or 1249.zip****** Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, anthm10a.txt This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. Box 2782 Champaign, IL 61825 When all other email fails try our Executive Director: Michael S. Hart We would prefer to send you this information by email (Internet, Bitnet, Compuserve, ATTMAIL or MCImail). ****** If you have an FTP program (or emulator), please FTP directly to the Project Gutenberg archives: [Mac users, do NOT point and click. . .type] ftp uiarchive.cso.uiuc.edu login: anonymous password: your@login cd etext/etext90 through /etext96 or cd etext/articles [get suggest gut for more information] dir [to see files] get or mget [to get files. . .set bin for zip files] GET INDEX?00.GUT for a list of books and GET NEW GUT for general information and MGET GUT* for newsletters. **Information prepared by the Project Gutenberg legal advisor** (Three Pages) ***START**THE SMALL PRINT!**FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS**START*** Why is this "Small Print!" statement here? You know: lawyers. They tell us you might sue us if there is something wrong with your copy of this etext, even if you got it for free from someone other than us, and even if what's wrong is not our fault. So, among other things, this "Small Print!" statement disclaims most of our liability to you. It also tells you how you can distribute copies of this etext if you want to. *BEFORE!* YOU USE OR READ THIS ETEXT By using or reading any part of this PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, you indicate that you understand, agree to and accept this "Small Print!" statement. If you do not, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for this etext by sending a request within 30 days of receiving it to the person you got it from. If you received this etext on a physical medium (such as a disk), you must return it with your request. ABOUT PROJECT GUTENBERG-TM ETEXTS This PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, like most PROJECT GUTENBERG- tm etexts, is a "public domain" work distributed by Professor Michael S. 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LIMITED WARRANTY; DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES But for the "Right of Replacement or Refund" described below, [1] the Project (and any other party you may receive this etext from as a PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext) disclaims all liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal fees, and [2] YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE OR UNDER STRICT LIABILITY, OR FOR BREACH OF WARRANTY OR CONTRACT, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR INCIDENTAL DAMAGES, EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGES. If you discover a Defect in this etext within 90 days of receiving it, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending an explanatory note within that time to the person you received it from. If you received it on a physical medium, you must return it with your note, and such person may choose to alternatively give you a replacement copy. If you received it electronically, such person may choose to alternatively give you a second opportunity to receive it electronically. THIS ETEXT IS OTHERWISE PROVIDED TO YOU "AS-IS". NO OTHER WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, ARE MADE TO YOU AS TO THE ETEXT OR ANY MEDIUM IT MAY BE ON, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE. Some states do not allow disclaimers of implied warranties or the exclusion or limitation of consequential damages, so the above disclaimers and exclusions may not apply to you, and you may have other legal rights. INDEMNITY You will indemnify and hold the Project, its directors, officers, members and agents harmless from all liability, cost and expense, including legal fees, that arise directly or indirectly from any of the following that you do or cause: [1] distribution of this etext, [2] alteration, modification, or addition to the etext, or [3] any Defect. 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You may however, if you wish, distribute this etext in machine readable binary, compressed, mark-up, or proprietary form, including any form resulting from conversion by word pro- cessing or hypertext software, but only so long as *EITHER*: [*] The etext, when displayed, is clearly readable, and does *not* contain characters other than those intended by the author of the work, although tilde (~), asterisk (*) and underline (_) characters may be used to convey punctuation intended by the author, and additional characters may be used to indicate hypertext links; OR [*] The etext may be readily converted by the reader at no expense into plain ASCII, EBCDIC or equivalent form by the program that displays the etext (as is the case, for instance, with most word processors); OR [*] You provide, or agree to also provide on request at no additional cost, fee or expense, a copy of the etext in its original plain ASCII form (or in EBCDIC or other equivalent proprietary form). [2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. 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[-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | energy | How many times the word 'energy' appears in the text? | 0 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1249] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* ******This file should be named 1249.txt or 1249.zip****** Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, anthm10a.txt This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. 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LIMITED WARRANTY; DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES But for the "Right of Replacement or Refund" described below, [1] the Project (and any other party you may receive this etext from as a PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext) disclaims all liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal fees, and [2] YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE OR UNDER STRICT LIABILITY, OR FOR BREACH OF WARRANTY OR CONTRACT, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR INCIDENTAL DAMAGES, EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGES. If you discover a Defect in this etext within 90 days of receiving it, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending an explanatory note within that time to the person you received it from. If you received it on a physical medium, you must return it with your note, and such person may choose to alternatively give you a replacement copy. If you received it electronically, such person may choose to alternatively give you a second opportunity to receive it electronically. THIS ETEXT IS OTHERWISE PROVIDED TO YOU "AS-IS". NO OTHER WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, ARE MADE TO YOU AS TO THE ETEXT OR ANY MEDIUM IT MAY BE ON, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE. Some states do not allow disclaimers of implied warranties or the exclusion or limitation of consequential damages, so the above disclaimers and exclusions may not apply to you, and you may have other legal rights. INDEMNITY You will indemnify and hold the Project, its directors, officers, members and agents harmless from all liability, cost and expense, including legal fees, that arise directly or indirectly from any of the following that you do or cause: [1] distribution of this etext, [2] alteration, modification, or addition to the etext, or [3] any Defect. 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You may however, if you wish, distribute this etext in machine readable binary, compressed, mark-up, or proprietary form, including any form resulting from conversion by word pro- cessing or hypertext software, but only so long as *EITHER*: [*] The etext, when displayed, is clearly readable, and does *not* contain characters other than those intended by the author of the work, although tilde (~), asterisk (*) and underline (_) characters may be used to convey punctuation intended by the author, and additional characters may be used to indicate hypertext links; OR [*] The etext may be readily converted by the reader at no expense into plain ASCII, EBCDIC or equivalent form by the program that displays the etext (as is the case, for instance, with most word processors); OR [*] You provide, or agree to also provide on request at no additional cost, fee or expense, a copy of the etext in its original plain ASCII form (or in EBCDIC or other equivalent proprietary form). [2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. 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[-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | modesty | How many times the word 'modesty' appears in the text? | 0 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1249] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* ******This file should be named 1249.txt or 1249.zip****** Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, anthm10a.txt This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. 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[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. 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[-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | errors | How many times the word 'errors' appears in the text? | 1 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. 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What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. 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[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. [-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | minutes | How many times the word 'minutes' appears in the text? | 0 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. 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What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. 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[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. [-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | little | How many times the word 'little' appears in the text? | 0 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1249] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* ******This file should be named 1249.txt or 1249.zip****** Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, anthm10a.txt This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. 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What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. 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If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. 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They tell us you might sue us if there is something wrong with your copy of this etext, even if you got it for free from someone other than us, and even if what's wrong is not our fault. So, among other things, this "Small Print!" statement disclaims most of our liability to you. It also tells you how you can distribute copies of this etext if you want to. *BEFORE!* YOU USE OR READ THIS ETEXT By using or reading any part of this PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, you indicate that you understand, agree to and accept this "Small Print!" statement. If you do not, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for this etext by sending a request within 30 days of receiving it to the person you got it from. If you received this etext on a physical medium (such as a disk), you must return it with your request. ABOUT PROJECT GUTENBERG-TM ETEXTS This PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, like most PROJECT GUTENBERG- tm etexts, is a "public domain" work distributed by Professor Michael S. 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[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. [-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | ducks | How many times the word 'ducks' appears in the text? | 0 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1249] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* ******This file should be named 1249.txt or 1249.zip****** Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, anthm10a.txt This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. 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[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a new copy has at least one byte more or less. Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This projected audience is one hundred million readers. If our value per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text files per month, or 384 more Etexts in 1998 for a total of 1500+ If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the total should reach over 150 billion Etexts given away. The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. We need your donations more than ever! All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/CMU": and are tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (CMU = Carnegie- Mellon University). For these and other matters, please mail to: Project Gutenberg P. O. Box 2782 Champaign, IL 61825 When all other email fails try our Executive Director: Michael S. Hart We would prefer to send you this information by email (Internet, Bitnet, Compuserve, ATTMAIL or MCImail). ****** If you have an FTP program (or emulator), please FTP directly to the Project Gutenberg archives: [Mac users, do NOT point and click. . .type] ftp uiarchive.cso.uiuc.edu login: anonymous password: your@login cd etext/etext90 through /etext96 or cd etext/articles [get suggest gut for more information] dir [to see files] get or mget [to get files. . .set bin for zip files] GET INDEX?00.GUT for a list of books and GET NEW GUT for general information and MGET GUT* for newsletters. **Information prepared by the Project Gutenberg legal advisor** (Three Pages) ***START**THE SMALL PRINT!**FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS**START*** Why is this "Small Print!" statement here? You know: lawyers. They tell us you might sue us if there is something wrong with your copy of this etext, even if you got it for free from someone other than us, and even if what's wrong is not our fault. So, among other things, this "Small Print!" statement disclaims most of our liability to you. It also tells you how you can distribute copies of this etext if you want to. *BEFORE!* YOU USE OR READ THIS ETEXT By using or reading any part of this PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, you indicate that you understand, agree to and accept this "Small Print!" statement. If you do not, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for this etext by sending a request within 30 days of receiving it to the person you got it from. If you received this etext on a physical medium (such as a disk), you must return it with your request. ABOUT PROJECT GUTENBERG-TM ETEXTS This PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, like most PROJECT GUTENBERG- tm etexts, is a "public domain" work distributed by Professor Michael S. 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[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this "Small Print!" statement. [3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the net profits you derive calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are payable to "Project Gutenberg Association/Carnegie-Mellon University" within the 60 days following each date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg Association / Carnegie-Mellon University". *END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. [-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | prowled | How many times the word 'prowled' appears in the text? | 0 |
*******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version 10z, a comparison of the original files we used to create versions 10 and 10a. . .which helped us correct a few errors per chapter in those versions. Those with interest in a greater understanding of those differences in editing, language and grammar selections, may find this comparison of value. Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1249] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* ******This file should be named 1249.txt or 1249.zip****** Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, anthm10a.txt This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. 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What follows is a complete comparison, including the headers. *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* #1 in our series by Ayn Rand This is version [-10,-] {+10a,+} you may also want to [-try-] {+look at+} version [-10a,-] {+10,+} with [-wider margins-] {+narrower margins,+} and slightly different [-wordings.-] {+wording.+} Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! Anthem is still under copyright in Canada. Please do not put it on Canadian computers. Caxton Printers, who used to own the United States copyrights to Anthem by Ayn Rand, as per an agreement with Pamphleteers, was VERY kind and VERY open about explaining the copyright of Anthem, and how it came to be not renewed in the U.S.; and we would like to add, on their behalf, that their copyrights are still in force for Anthem in Canada. Neither we nor they are in a current position to research the possible copyrights for other countries, so that is possibly still up in the air. It behooves me, since they have been so forthcoming about this-- to encourage you to buy the only hardcover edition available. You may contact them via: www.caxtonprinters.com publish@caxtonprinters.com 800-657-6465 & 208-459-7421 Fax Line Is: 208-459-7450 Please tell them you were sent by Project Gutenberg Please take a look at the important information in this header. We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. **Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** **Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** *These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and further information is included below. We need your donations. Anthem by Ayn Rand March, 1998 [Etext #1250] *******The Project Gutenberg Etext of Anthem, by Ayn Rand******* [-******This-] {+*****This+} file should be named [-anthm10.txt-] {+anthm10a.txt+} or [-anthm10.zip******-] {+anthm10a.zip*****+} Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, anthm11.txt VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, [-anthm10a.txt-] {+anthm10b.txt+} This Etext was prepared by an anonymous group of volunteers. Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we do NOT keep these books in compliance with any particular paper edition, usually otherwise. We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance of the official release dates, for time for better editing. Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. 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[-ANTHEM by Ayn Rand PART ONE-] {+Chapter One+} It is a sin to write this. It is a sin to think words no others think and to put them down upon a paper no others are to see. It is base and evil. It is as if we were speaking alone to no ears but our own. And we know well that there is no transgression blacker than to do or think alone. We have broken the laws. The laws say that men may not write unless the Council of Vocations bid them so. May we be forgiven! But this is not the only sin upon us. We have committed a greater crime, and for this crime there is no name. What punishment awaits us if it be discovered we know not, for no such crime has come in the memory of men and there are no laws to provide for it. It is dark here. The flame of the candle stands still in the air. Nothing moves in this tunnel save our [-hand-] {+hands+} on the paper. We are alone here under the earth. It is a fearful word, alone. The laws say that none among men may be alone, ever and at any time, for this is the great transgression and the root of all evil. But we have broken many laws. And now there is nothing here save our one body, and it is strange to see only two legs stretched on the ground, and on the wall before us the shadow of our one head. The walls are cracked and water runs upon them in thin threads without sound, black and glistening as blood. We stole the candle from the larder of the Home of the Street Sweepers. We shall be sentenced to ten years in the Palace of Corrective Detention if it be discovered. But this matters not. It matters only that the light is precious and we should not waste it to write when we need it for that work which is our crime. Nothing matters save the work, our secret, our evil, our precious work. Still, we must also write, for--may the [-council-] {+Council+} have mercy upon us!--we wish to speak for once to no ears but our own. Our name is Equality 7-2521, as it is written on the iron bracelet which all men wear on [-the-] {+their+} left wrists with their names upon it. We are twenty-one years old. We are six feet tall, and this is a burden, for there are not many men who are six feet tall. Ever have the Teachers and the Leaders pointed to us and frowned and said: "There is evil in your bones, Equality 7-2521, for your body has grown beyond the bodies of your brothers." But we cannot change our bones nor our body. We were born with a curse. It has always driven us to thoughts which are forbidden. It has always given us wishes which men may not wish. We know that we are evil, but there is no will in us and no power to resist it. This is our wonder and our secret fear, that we know and do not resist. We strive to be like all our brother men, for all men must be alike. Over the portals of the Palace of the World Council, there are words cut in the marble, which we {+are required to+} repeat to ourselves whenever we are [-tempted: "WE ARE ONE IN ALL AND ALL IN ONE. THERE ARE NO MEN BUT ONLY THE GREAT _WE_, ONE, INDIVISIBLE AND FOREVER."-] {+tempted:--"We are one in all and all in one. There are no men but only the great WE, One, indivisible and forever."--+} We repeat this to ourselves, but it helps us not. These words were cut long ago. There is green mould in the grooves of the letters and yellow streaks [-on-] {+in+} the marble, which come from more years than men could count. And these words are the truth, for they are written on the Palace of the World Council, and the World Council is the body of all truth. Thus has it been ever since the Great Rebirth, and farther back than that no memory can reach. But we must never speak of the times before the Great Rebirth, else we are sentenced to three years in the Palace of Corrective Detention. It is only the Old Ones who whisper about it in the evenings, in the Home of the Useless. They whisper many strange things, of the towers which rose to the sky, in those Unmentionable Times, and of the wagons which moved without horses, and of the lights which burned without flame. But those times were evil. And those times passed away, when men saw the Great Truth which is this: that all men are one and that there is no will save the will of all men together. All men are good and wise. It is only we, Equality 7-2521, we alone who were born with a curse. For we are not like our brothers. And as we look back upon our life, we see that it has ever been thus and that it has brought us step by step to our last, supreme transgression, our [-crime-] {+crimes+} of crimes hidden here under the ground. We remember the Home of the Infants where we lived till we were five years old, together with all the children of the City who had been born in the same year. The sleeping halls there were white and clean and bare of all things save one hundred beds. We were just like all our brothers then, save for the one transgression: we fought with our brothers. There are few offenses blacker than to fight with our brothers, at any age and for any cause whatsoever. The Council of the Home told us so, and of all the children of that year, we were locked in the cellar most often. When we were five years old, we were sent to the Home of the Students, where there are ten wards, for our ten years of learning. Men must learn till they reach their fifteenth year. Then they go to work. In the Home of the Students we arose when the big bell rang in the tower and we went to our beds when it rang again. Before we removed our garments, we stood in the great sleeping hall, and we raised our right arms, and we said all together with | helped | How many times the word 'helped' appears in the text? | 1 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | can | How many times the word 'can' appears in the text? | 2 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | raising | How many times the word 'raising' appears in the text? | 1 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | wide | How many times the word 'wide' appears in the text? | 1 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | observed | How many times the word 'observed' appears in the text? | 0 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | xanax | How many times the word 'xanax' appears in the text? | 1 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | shots | How many times the word 'shots' appears in the text? | 3 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | em | How many times the word 'em' appears in the text? | 3 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | cool | How many times the word 'cool' appears in the text? | 2 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | gimme | How many times the word 'gimme' appears in the text? | 1 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | nothing | How many times the word 'nothing' appears in the text? | 3 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | nearly | How many times the word 'nearly' appears in the text? | 1 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | stairwell | How many times the word 'stairwell' appears in the text? | 2 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | only | How many times the word 'only' appears in the text? | 3 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | holds | How many times the word 'holds' appears in the text? | 2 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | fluttering | How many times the word 'fluttering' appears in the text? | 1 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | death | How many times the word 'death' appears in the text? | 2 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | men | How many times the word 'men' appears in the text? | 2 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | couch | How many times the word 'couch' appears in the text? | 3 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | announced | How many times the word 'announced' appears in the text? | 0 |
- He still stares in awe. ON SAM - He smiles and offers an outstretched hand for a handshake. BACK TO NORMAL SPEED - Sam walks up to John with Ted by his side. TED John, this is Sam Jones. Sam, this is my best friend in the whole world, John. SAM Hi there. Good to meet you. (CONTINUED) 76 CONTINUED: JOHN (in absolute fucking awe) I... thank you for saving every one of us. SAM You're welcome. Hey, let's do some shots, huh? JOHN With you? Yes. Oh my god, yes. Sam passes out shots of Southern Comfort. SAM (raising his glass) Death to Ming! John and Ted look at each other, squealing with delight. Everyone then does their shots. SAM (CONT'D) Hey, you guys seem pretty cool. (SIGNIFICANTLY) You like to party? John and Ted don't answer for a beat. They look at each other nervously. It's clear neither one has any experience with this sort of thing. SAM (CONT'D) Aw, come on dudes. Don't tell me you've never done it before. JOHN (a little scared) Not... recently, no. SAM You fellas better come with me. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SHORTLY AFTER John, Ted, and Sam emerge from the bathroom. John's eyes are wide and enthusiastic. Ted has a little bit of powder on his nose, and his ears are flattened back. And Sam is just playing it cool. TED Wow. SAM Let's party like the `80's huh? (CONTINUED) 77 CONTINUED: TED (REVERENTIAL) Show us how, Flash. SAM It's easy. We just gotta bang a lotta girls named Stephanie. JOHN Holy shit. (looking around intensely) All these people need to be talked to. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John and Ted sit staring at each other intensely across the table. TED Look Johnny, if we're ever gonna get serious about openin' a restaurant we gotta start plannin' it now. JOHN Italian. TED Italian, yes. JOHN What's the special on Tuesdays? TED Eggplant parm. JOHN Chopped salad half price. TED And it's a non-restricted place. JOHN Yeah--wait, whaddaya mean? TED Anybody can come. JOHN Of course. TED Mormons are welcome. (CONTINUED) 78 CONTINUED: JOHN Well yeah--why wouldn't they be? TED Exactly, that's what I'm saying. JOHN But why even bring that up-- TED You don't bring it up. You just let `em in. JOHN Yeah, but why mention it? TED No one will. JOHN So why are we talking about it? TED You're talkin' about it, I'm just sayin' let `em in. JOHN Yes, let `em in. TED Exactly. JOHN Right. TED Good. JOHN Okay. TED No Catholics, though. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - SAME Ted stands opposite a group of party guests who sit on the couch. He holds a knife. TED No see, I can do this. GUY #1 Shut up. (CONTINUED) 79 CONTINUED: TED My teddy bear biology gives me superhuman reflexes. GUY #2 Let him try it, man. GUY #1 Fuck it, all right. Guy #1 puts his hand down on the coffee table and Ted starts doing the knife trick from "Aliens". He gets it right for a few seconds, then stabs the guy right through the hand. The guy screams in pain. TED Well, you never shoulda trusted me, I'm on drugs! INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John stands with a pair of fake bear ears on his head, doing an impression of Ted as a small group of partygoers (Ted included) watches, laughing hysterically. JOHN (AS TED) Hey Johnny, I just had a great idea-- let's go get drunk and puke on cars from the overpass! TED Oh god, that was a fun day. JOHN (AS TED) Johnny, you gotta get over here man, I just tried this DMT all the kids are talkin' about, and I'm in trouble! I think I got sucked inside my chair! TED I do not sound that much like Peter Griffin. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted sits on the couch drawing a pair of Garfield eyes on a topless girl. Below the eyes he has drawn the muzzle and the mouth, and above them the ears. (CONTINUED) 80 CONTINUED: TED See? There. Proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. TAMI-LYNN Okay, you were right. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted stands by the TV, singing a karaoke version of "I Only Want to be with You" by Hootie and the Blowfish. TED Okay, Johnny, c'mon up here and do this with me! JOHN No no. TED Come on! JOHN No, I don't sing in front of people! TED YOU AND ME, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT WORLDS. YOU LIKE TO LAUGH AT ME WHEN I LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS. SOMETIMES YOU'RE CRAZY AND YOU WONDER WHY I'M SUCH A BABY `CAUSE DOLPHINS MAKE CRY. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR A GIRL LIKE YOU. YOU LOOK AT ME YOU'VE GOT NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. I'LL ONLY POUT AT YOU UNTIL I GET MY WAY. I WON'T DANCE. YOU WON'T SING. I JUST WANT TO LOVE YOU BUT YOU WANT TO WEAR MY RING. WELL THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO. I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. YOU CAN CALL ME YOUR FOOL, I ONLY WANNA BE WITH YOU. INT. TED'S BEDROOM - LATER Sam, John and Ted stand by the wall. TED See there's this one part of the wall that's really soft, you could punch through it wicked easy. Sam punches the wall a couple times, and his fist goes right through. (CONTINUED) 81 CONTINUED: SAM/TED/JOHN Holy shit! / Ha! / Wow! / Etc. Immediately we see half an Asian face dart into frame through the hole. He screams in Cantonese, then, ASIAN MAN What the hell you problem!! You break my wall! You break my wall I break you wall! The neighbor sticks a knife through the hole. John, Ted, and Sam scream. Sam and John jump around and scream as they frantically try to get the knife. JOHN AAA! AAA!! Break his arm, Flash! Cut his arm off!! Sam grabs the arm, and it darts back inside. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER There's an angry pounding on the door. One of the party guests opens it, and the Asian guy runs in, screaming in Cantonese. He holds a wooden spoon in one hand, and a live duck in the other. John, Sam, and Ted run back out into the living room. The Asian guy runs toward them, screaming first in Cantonese, then: ASIAN MAN You break my wall! This my home long time! You break my wall! You bastard men! JOHN/TED Dude, we're sorry! We're sorry! ASIAN MAN You bastard men! I try to make duck dinner, now plaster everywhere! TED Chill out okay? We'll pay for it! Let's talk this out okay? What's your name? I'm John! ASIAN MAN (CAUTIOUSLY) My name Wan Ming. FLASH (NARROWING EYES) Ming! (CONTINUED) 82 CONTINUED: SAM'S POV - We see the Asian man dressed as Ming the Merciless. ASIAN MAN You pay many dollar for wall! This bullshit! This all bullshit! SAM DEATH TO MING!!! Sam charges the Asian man, tackling him. They both tumble over the back of the couch, nearly knocking it over. The duck flies out of his arms, landing on the floor. It immediately goes after Ted, who screams. ANGLE ON SAM, who chokes the Asian man on the floor. John struggles to pull him off. JOHN Sam, no! Get off him! ANGLE ON TED - who circles confrontationally with the duck, as in an Irish bar fight. ANGLE BACK ON THE GUYS FIGHTING - The Asian man jabs Sam in the eye with the other end of the spoon, and Sam goes staggering backward, falling into John. They land on the table, smashing it in half. They fall to the floor on top of each other. ASIAN MAN You crazy! You crazy man! The duck charges at Ted and slaps him across the face a few times with its wings. TED AAA! AAAA! OW!! The Asian man calls to the duck from the door. ASIAN MAN Come on, James Franco! The duck takes one last whack at Ted and waddles over to the Asian man, fluttering up into his arms. ASIAN MAN (CONT'D) (to John and Sam) You pay for wall! He exits, slamming the door. INT. TED'S APARTMENT - LATER John sits on the couch as Guy enters, holding hands with another man. (CONTINUED) 83 CONTINUED: JOHN Guy? GUY Hey. What's goin' on. This is Jared. He's the guy who beat me up. We're in love. JOHN What?? GUY Yeah. Turns out I'm gay or whatever. Had no idea. C'mon Jared, let's get a drink. He and Jared walk off. ANGLE ON JOHN, who sits on the couch, looking zoned out and drained. Sam Jones approaches. SAM How you doin' there, ace? You comin' down? JOHN Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel good. SAM Give it a couple hours, you'll be golden, Pony Boy. Want a Xanax? John looks at the clock. His eyes widen in panicked realization. JOHN Holy shit. Holy shit, oh my god! SAM What? JOHN I gotta-- I gotta go! Shit! John scrambles to his feet, and runs for the front door. INT. STAIRWELL - CONTINUOUS John opens the door and runs down the hall. He runs partway down the stairwell, and stops short as he sees Lori at the bottom, coming partway up the stairs. They stare at each other for a beat. She looks as hurt, angry, and betrayed as a woman can be. (CONTINUED) 84 CONTINUED: JOHN Lori... I... He throws up all over the floor. EXT. TED'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Lori storms out into the street. After a beat, John runs out after her. JOHN Lori! Lori wait! She hastily pays the cabbie who waits outside. John catches up to her and grabs her arm, but she shakes him off. She is clearly hurt, and on the verge of tears. JOHN (CONT'D) I'm sorry! I messed up! I-- LORI I want you out of the apartment... tonight. Gimme my car keys. JOHN Can I please just explain-- LORI No. JOHN I was gonna-- LORI I have given up a big chunk of my life for you. JOHN I was gonna stop in for like five minutes, and then Flash Gordon-- LORI Just give me my keys, John! He reluctantly hands her her keys. She turns and walks toward her car. JOHN Lori... please. I love you. She gets in the car and drives away with a screech. Angle on Ted, who is walking out the door. (CONTINUED) 85 CONTINUED: TED Johnny, come on upstairs. Tami-Lynn's gonna make some RC Cola from scratch. JOHN Fuck you! I don't want to talk to you! TED What? JOHN Do you know what just happened? Do you have any clue? My life just ended. TED Oh come on, she'll go home, watch Bridget Jones' Somethin' Asshole, cry a little bit, she'll be fine, you'll talk to her tomorrow. JOHN (EXPLODING) Are you even listening to me?! Do you give any shred of a shit?! Ted pauses, realizing John is serious. TED Well... `course I do, Johnny. Thunder buddies for life. JOHN Jesus, Lori was right. I should have stopped hanging out with you a long time ago. I'm never gonna have a life with you around. I'm 35 years old and I'm going nowhere. All I do is smoke pot and watch movies with a teddy fucking bear. And because of that, I just lost the love of my life. TED Johnny, I'm... I'm sorry. JOHN I just... I gotta be on my own, Ted. I can't see you anymore. John turns and walks away. TED Johnny, wait! Hey, listen! (CONTINUED) 86 CONTINUED: Ted pushes his own stomach in. We hear his soundbox squeak out the words "I wuv you." John does not turn around. Ted looks after him, then slowly lowers his head sadly. He sits down on the sidewalk, dazed and defeated. DISSOLVE TO: MONTAGE: SET TO MUSIC - SONG TBD EXT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John pulls up in his car, and sadly goes inside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT John sits on the bed and turns on the TV. He flips through the channels, seeing various clips of shows. Eventually, he shuts off the TV. He opens his wallet, and takes out a picture of Lori. He looks at it sadly. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MINI GOLF COURSE - NIGHT John and Lori play mini-golf. She putts, and the ball stops just short of the hole. John walks up to it, and "looks the other way" as he taps it in with his foot. She smiles warmly at him. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. BOSTON COMMON - SUNSET John and Lori are on a swan boat ride, throwing bread to the ducks. They're both leaning over the side with their hands on the rail. His hand moves partway on top of hers. They look at each other, and share a slow, romantic kiss. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT Lori sits on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, her face wet with tears. ANGLE ON the TV screen, where a Bridget Jones film is playing. ANGLE BACK ON Lori, who is looking at the screen, but is really looking inward... DISSOLVE TO: 87 EXT. BEACH - DUSK ANGLE ON a partially full moon. PAN DOWN to John and Lori, walking along the beach, holding hands. He kisses her on the cheek, then looks down, noticing something O.S. He leans down and picks up a dead horseshoe crab. He dangles it in Lori's face. She freaks out, and runs into the water. They both laugh. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON A BIRTHDAY CARD ON THE TABLE - We pull out to reveal Lori sitting at the table, with a couple of candles in front of her. John comes out of the kitchen wearing an apron, and holding an entire turkey with a candle in it. She smiles and puts her hands over her mouth with delighted hilarity. He sets the turkey down, and she gives him a big, laughing smile as she shakes her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. TED'S APARTMENT - NIGHT SLOW PAN ACROSS TED'S APARTMENT - The party is now over. Everyone has gone, and the place is a mess. ANGLE INTO TED'S BEDROOM - He lies alone in his bed, flipping through channels with his remote. He turns and stares at a picture in a frame next to his bed. ANGLE ON THE PICTURE It shows John and Ted as kids, standing in the snow, smiling at the camera. They stand next to a soapbox car that they have built and painted. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - DAY 8-year-old John and Ted are at the top of a hill with the soapbox racer. Ted is in the racer, wearing a helmet. John gives the racer a push, and Ted speeds off down the hill. At the bottom, he smashes into a tree, shattering the racer, and sending him flying out of it onto the ground. A dog runs into frame, snatches Ted up, and runs off with him. John sprints after the dog. DISSOLVE TO: 88 INT. JOHN'S HIGH-SCHOOL ROOM - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 5th season!" ANGLE ON 17 year-old John and Ted watching TV, laughing hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT The marquee out front reads "Star Wars: The Phantom Menace." We pan down a line of moviegoers, eventually getting to 22 year-old John and Ted. John is dressed as Darth Maul, and Ted is dressed as Yoda. They excitedly wait in line. DISSOLVE TO: EXT./ ESTAB. CHUCK E. CHEESE - DAY INT. CHUCK E. CHEESE - SAME John and Ted share a pizza. Ted has sauce all over his mouth and fur. John hands him a napkin and he wipes it off. Ted looks O.S., then excitedly gives John a "hang on, check this out" gesture. He runs O.S. ANGLE ON the stage, where the animal band play their instruments. Ted is there among them, stiffly playing the banjo and looking very animatronic. A couple little kids walk up to watch. After a beat, Ted gets in their faces, scaring the shit out of them. They run away, crying and traumatized. ANGLE ON John, who laughs hysterically. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - DAY John and Lori paint the walls of their then new apartment. They start to playfully splatter paint on each other. ANGLE ON Ted, who watches from the other side of the room, where he leans against the wall. He shakes his head in a "whatever" fashion, and walks toward the door. When he turns, we see there is a white stripe of paint going down his back. EXT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - LATER Ted exits the apartment, holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulls one cigarette out with his mouth and goes to light it. (CONTINUED) 89 CONTINUED: He then notices something out of the corner of his eye. He reacts with a take, and sprints O.S., dropping the cigarette and the lighter. After a beat, a skunk shuffles through frame after him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. JOHN AND LORI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT ANGLE ON a TV Guide cover that reads, "Simpsons Reaches 20th season!" ANGLE ON present-day John and Ted watching TV, expressionless and bored-looking. DISSOLVE TO: INT./ ESTAB. LORI'S OFFICE - DAY INT. REX'S OFFICE - SAME Rex sits at his desk and stares out the window. REX So, word through the grapevine is you are newly solo. I have tickets to see Norah Jones at the Hatch Shell tonight, and I would love it if you'd go with me. LORI You're asking me out the day after I broke up with someone. REX Look, I'm gonna cut the shit here. LORI Okay. REX This is the first time you've been single in all the years you've worked here. Just go out with me one time. And if you're miserable and you hate it, I promise I will never even hint at the subject again. Please. LORI Rex, I don't think it's smart. REX Look, I'm an asshole. I know that. It worked for me in high school, and it's been like a reflex ever since. (MORE) (CONTINUED) 90 CONTINUED: REX (CONT'D) (sigh) Lori, the worst that can happen is you have a fun, casual date with a guy who only wants a chance to prove to you that he can be something more than a jerk. Besides, you're a huge catch and it's about time somebody treated you that way. LORI Fine... I guess it beats crying myself to sleep every night. REX Great. Pick you up at seven? EXT./ ESTAB. MIDTOWN HOTEL - NIGHT It's raining outside. INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL - SAME John sulks on the bed, leafing through a Tintin comic book. There's a knock at the door. JOHN Who is it? TED Johnny, it's me. JOHN Go away. TED Johnny, open the door, please. I wanna talk. John ignores him. A few beats go by, then the window slides open from the outside, and Ted tumbles in, landing on the floor, soaked. JOHN JESUS-- Ted shakes the water off himself like a dog. John flinches back, trying not to get wet. JOHN (CONT'D) Jesus Christ! (CONTINUED) 91 CONTINUED: TED Sorry. Look, Johnny, I know you're pissed, but just listen to me for five seconds. I saw Lori out on a date with Rex. JOHN What? TED I'm serious, John, I went over to your house to talk to Lori to try and take some of the heat off you, and I saw Rex picking her up. They were going to the Hatch Shell. JOHN You're un-fucking-believable, you know that? How stupid do you think I am? First of all, Lori would never go out with Rex, and second of all, if you think that by making shit like that up you're gonna make me choose some kind of loyalty to you over her-- TED Johnny, it's the truth. I'm tellin' ya-- JOHN Get outta here. TED (BEAT) You know, you're actin' like a cock, you know that? JOHN What? I'm acting like a cock? TED Yes. You are actin' like a giant, V- shaped-funny-lookin'-guy-in-a-porno cock. JOHN Huh? TED `Member that porno we saw with the guy with the V-shaped cock--forget it. What I'm sayin' is that you're blamin' me for somethin' you did to yourself. John glares at him. (CONTINUED) 92 CONTINUED: TED (CONT'D) Lori was right about you. You can't take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. JOHN Oh, and you can? TED I don't have to, I'm a fuckin' teddy bear! Y'know somethin', I didn't tie you up and drag you to that party. I wanted you to come because you're supposedly my best friend. JOHN Oh, yeah? Is that why you've manipulated me for years to stay eternally eight years old at the expense of the rest of my life? TED Whoa whoa, it's not my fault you didn't care enough about your relationship. JOHN You can't stand there and tell me you haven't always seen Lori as a threat to our friendship! It works out so much better for you when you and I are getting fucked up on the couch at 9 am, doesn't it? TED Wow. Listen to yourself. What am I, Emperor Ming here, controllin' your mind? That's your choice, John! And you know, by blamin' me, you just make yourself look like a pussy. JOHN (BEAT) You know... sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning when I was eight years old... and I wish I'd just gotten a Teddy Ruxpin. TED (BEAT) Say that one more time. JOHN Teddy... Rux-fucking-pin. (CONTINUED) 93 CONTINUED: Ted stares at him for a beat, then lunges at him, wrapping his whole body around John's face and head, like the facehuggers from "Aliens." John stumbles around the room, trying to pry Ted off. Eventually, he stumbles into the bathroom, and crashes through the shower door, shattering it. He and Ted exchange punches to the face. John lands a particularly hard one, which sends Ted flying across the room, and slamming into the wall. Ted hits the floor, and runs out of the bathroom. John stumbles to his feet. Ted scrambles across the bed, reaches into the bedside drawer, and pulls out a Bible. John staggers out of the bathroom, just in time to be pelted in the head as Ted throws the Bible at him. JOHN (CONT'D) AAAAAA!!! Fucking Jesus fucking Christ! god fucking dammit!!! Ted throws other objects at him, including beer cans and the phone. John and Ted stare at each other for a beat, each one breathing heavily (Ted is now on the floor). John charges at Ted, sailing across the bed, and tackling him, knocking over the side table and lamp in the process. John and Ted scuffle on the floor, engaging in a realistic-as-possible fistfight. Each one gets a number of blows in. John throws Ted off him, and back onto the bed. Ted taunts him. TED C'mon, motherfucker! John jumps at Ted, throwing a jab at him. But Ted dodges, and John's fist goes into the wall above the headboard. He struggles to pull free as he flails about with his other hand, grabbing at Ted. Ted dodges again, and scrambles up John's head, jumping up and grabbing the chain on the ceiling fan, turning it on, and causing Ted to swing back and forth. John pulls free, and stumbles backward off the bed. He notices a tall, free-standing lamp in the corner. He pulls the plug out of the wall, and uses the lamp to take a swing at Ted. Ted swings out of the way. John takes a second swing, but the lamp cord catches on the fan's motor. The lamp is ripped from John's grasp, it swings around through the air, and cracks him in the side of the head. John goes down, whacking his head a second time on the baseboard of the bed. He howls in pain as he lies on his stomach, clutching his head. Ted takes advantage of this. He jumps down from the cord, and pulls the antenna off the clock radio next to the bed. He jumps down to the floor, yanks John's pants partway down, and starts whipping his bare ass with the antenna. John yells in fury, and kicks blindly at Ted. He turns over, kicking ted in the face, and kicking the cabinet that the TV is on. (CONTINUED) 94 CONTINUED: The TV wobbles, and falls off the cabinet, landing with a crash, right on his groin. John lies there, with the TV on his crotch and his pants down, and breathes heavily. Ted, still dazed from the kick to the face, crawls over to him. Both breathe heavily. John's breathing deteriorates into sobs. TED (CONT'D) (BREATHING HEAVILY) Why...why are you crying? JOHN My dick is in the TV. John continues to sob. Ted climbs down off the table and up onto the bed. He pushes the TV off John, then lies down next to him. Ted starts to sob himself. TED I'm so sorry, Johnny. I'm so sorry. JOHN So am I, man. TED I love you. JOHN I love you, too. John hugs Ted, who hugs him back. TED Listen... you gotta let me help you make things right with you and Lori. JOHN There is no putting things right. She hates me. TED No, John, we can get her back. Look, remember when you were ten, and you hit that squirrel with your BB gun, and then when we saw it fall from the tree we both starting crying? Remember? And then we ran up to it and tried to give it CPR? And it came back to life? John, we could do that again. JOHN Ted, we crushed its rib cage and blew out its lungs trying to give it CPR. It died. (CONTINUED) 95 CONTINUED: TED (LONG BEAT) We can get Lori back. EXT. HATCH SHELL - NIGHT A huge crowd has gathered for the Norah Jones concert. They cheer as she sings "Come Away With Me," backed by a large string section. ANGLE ON Rex and Lori, who cheer in the audience along with everyone else. They seem to be having a fantastic time. REX God, she's so brave. YOUR MUSIC IS SO FUCKING BRAVE!! Norah finishes the song. NORAH Thanks so much! We're gonna take a short break, but we'll be back in a few! The crowd cheers. INT. BACKSTAGE - SHORTLY AFTER ANGLE ON a dressing room sign which reads NORAH JONES. We move inside the dressing room as Norah enters and pours a drink. TED (O.S.) Hey, play chopsticks, you jazzy slut! NORAH (turning, recognizing) Teddy!! How you doin', you fuzzy little asshole? She hugs him. TED Well, I'm not a hot half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hangin' in there. NORAH Well, half-Indian, but thanks. TED Eh, ooga booga, whatever. Hey, I want you to meet a good pal of mine. Hey Johnny, come on in! (CONTINUED) 96 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON the doorway, where John enters, a little nervous. TED (CONT'D) Norah, this is my friend John. JOHN (SELF-CONSCIOUSLY EXTENDS HAND) Hi. Hi, Norah Jones. NORAH (shaking his hand) Ha. Whoa, relax there, sweaty. You ready to bring down the house? JOHN Yes ma'am. Thank you for the opportunity, Ms.-- Ma'am Jones. TED Jesus, you look fantastic. NORAH Well, you're probably not used to seeing me fully clothed. TED Me and Norah met in 2002 at a party at Belinda Carlisle's house and we had awkward, fuzzy sex in the coatroom. NORAH Actually, you weren't so bad for a guy with no penis. TED I have written so many letters to Hasbro about that. EXT. HATCH SHELL - SHORTLY AFTER The crowd is cheering. Norah is back out on stage at the piano. NORAH Okay, I'm gonna give my chops a rest here and invite a friend of mine up to the stage. He's gonna sing a song to a very special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Let's give a big hand to John Bennett! (CONTINUED) 97 CONTINUED: The crowd applauds dutifully as John walks out onstage. ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Lori reacts, shocked. LORI Oh my god. John takes center stage, and looks down at Lori. JOHN Uh, hi. Um... This is for Lori Collins. Because I love her. This song always reminds me of the most important night of my life. The night we met. It's the theme song from the movie "Octopussy." The band begins playing. "All Time High". Inexplicably, Norah is playing the saxophone with a pair of shades on. JOHN (CONT'D) ALL I WANTED WAS A SWEET DISTRACTION FOR AN HOUR OR TWO / HAD NO INTENTION TO DO THE THINGS WE'VE DONE / FUNNY HOW IT ALWAYS GOES WITH LOVE, WHEN YOU DON'T LOOK, YOU FIND / BUT THEN WE'RE TWO OF A KIND / WE MOVE AS ONE ANGLE ON Lori and Rex. Rex is visibly derisive, but we see that Lori is softening. It's working... JOHN (CONT'D) WE'RE AN ALL-TIME HIGH / WE'LL CHANGE ALL THAT'S GONE BEFORE / DOING SO MUCH MORE / THAN FALLING IN LOVE REX (fake voice, covering his mouth and looking away) You suck, get off the stage! (then, for Lori's benefit) Hey, come on guys! The crowd starts to take the cue. CROWD Get off the stage! / Boooo! / You suck! / We wanna hear Norah! / Come on! ANGLE ON Ted in the wings. TED Ah, god. JOHN SO HOLD ON TIGHT / LET THE FLIGHT BEGIN... (CONTINUED) 98 CONTINUED: ANGLE ON a crazed audience member, who rushes the stage, racing toward John. CRAZY GUY You're an asshole! John flinches as he | pay | How many times the word 'pay' appears in the text? | 3 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | apostles | How many times the word 'apostles' appears in the text? | 0 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | snow | How many times the word 'snow' appears in the text? | 3 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | deeply | How many times the word 'deeply' appears in the text? | 1 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | minister | How many times the word 'minister' appears in the text? | 2 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | calm | How many times the word 'calm' appears in the text? | 2 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | around | How many times the word 'around' appears in the text? | 2 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | believe | How many times the word 'believe' appears in the text? | 2 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | stand | How many times the word 'stand' appears in the text? | 1 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | monica | How many times the word 'monica' appears in the text? | 1 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | work | How many times the word 'work' appears in the text? | 3 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | why | How many times the word 'why' appears in the text? | 3 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | willow | How many times the word 'willow' appears in the text? | 0 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | like-- | How many times the word 'like--' appears in the text? | 0 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | sermon | How many times the word 'sermon' appears in the text? | 0 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | than | How many times the word 'than' appears in the text? | 2 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | stronger | How many times the word 'stronger' appears in the text? | 0 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | falling | How many times the word 'falling' appears in the text? | 3 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | realm | How many times the word 'realm' appears in the text? | 0 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | navigator | How many times the word 'navigator' appears in the text? | 1 |
20 WOMEN lined up in front of planes. Waving, smiling, talking to each other. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart and a bevy of lovely competitors say hello to the press announcing the First Women's Air Derby, racing from Santa Monica to Cleveland. Dubbed by Will Rogers `the Powder Puff Derby,' these gals certainly know how to capture our attention. The next ANGLE shows Amelia watching some of her colleagues bouncing playfully on a see-saw. She smiles tolerantly, but maybe there's a little too much cheesecake for her taste. INT. RECEPTION AREA, PUTNAM'S - DAY 43 43 The crowded waiting room. We CLOSE on a young woman we scarcely recognize. It is Elinor. Though less than a year has passed, she seems much older. Sophisticated, poised. ANGLE. A secretary leads Elinor down the corridor to George's office. As they enter, George is pacing on the phone. G EORGE (into phone) Because Amelia invented the Powder Puff Derby for female pilots. Then the men running the damn race suddenly decide every woman has to carry a male navigator, and start from east of the Rockies so they won't crash into the mountains! Listens, impatient. 46. GEORGE (into phone) I'll tell you why it's a front page story. Because Amelia pulled every woman out of the race. So the organizers had to roll over and give in, or they'd have lost their shirts. You want me to write your headline? He glances over. Elinor in the doorway. GEORGE (into phone) Call you back. I've got a very important guest. He hangs up, gesturing graciously for her to sit. As she does... ELINOR Wish I was important enough for you to manage. GEORGE Well, I've just got one client. And most days she's more than I can manage. Even Elinor's smile seems older, more capable of subtlety. ELINOR Get in line behind the boys she smacked around on the Derby. He grins back. You bet. ELINOR (CONT'D) Some of the gal flyers had their doubts about her...well, her skill level. But she's everyone's champion now. GEORGE And both of those things. Are the S reasons I called you. trange words. He has her attention. GEORGE (CONT'D) I think it would be huge for women flyers if Amelia won the Derby. The publicity would put the race, and all of you, up there with the boys. 47. ELINOR I'm not sure she has much of a chance, Mr. Putnam. GEORGE Well, the one shot would be putting her in a far more powerful plane than anything she's flown. We're thinking the Lockheed Vega. The girl's shock. He really means this. ELINOR Sir, I've test piloted the Vega. It's way more than she could ever handle. It wouldn't be safe, let alone successful. He smiles. GEORGE That's why I'm thinking of you flying with her. You could handle the cross-country flying, the more difficult bits, and I'd pay you $75 a week. Elinor WHISTLES low. ELINOR Well, I think that's the most generous opportunity I've ever been offered. He stares at her. GEORGE There's just one thing. Obviously, it has to appear that Amelia did all the flying. So when pictures are taken, you'll stand off to one side. Her eyes narrow. He's completely serious. ELINOR In that case, I'll get my own plane and win the race myself. GEORGE You haven't changed. N o smile at all. 48. GEORGE (CONT'D) Unfortunately for you, neither have I. The look in his eye is not to be ignored. GEORGE (CONT'D) You can't win if you can't get a plane to enter. Let me predict that you won't. The voice calm and low and riveting. GEORGE (CONT'D) In fact. If you reject my generosity, you may come to regret it. For a long, long time. ELINOR That's a threat. GEORGE I'm an intensely loyal person, Elinor. And this is what my loyalty requires. She's glaring. Reeling. Trapped. ELINOR She's the one who said I shouldn't let anybody turn me around. GEORGE She probably meant me. So honest, the words confuse her. ELINOR Obviously, she doesn't see me as a threat. GEORGE Oh, sure she does. A straight smile... GEORGE (CONT'D) She just doesn't care. ...which silently fades. GEORGE (CONT'D) My job. Is to care for her. DISSOLVE TO... Y S W 49. 44 44 INT. OAK ROOM, PLAZA HOTEL, NEW YORK - NIGHT LONG ANGLE. Sophisticated watering hole. Crowded tonight. PAN to find George alone, waiting. A waiter leads Amelia to the table. George stands, smiling. But the smile is not returned. We CLOSE as they sit... GEORGE A hat's wrong? MELIA (clearly furious) What could be wrong? I had such a lovely afternoon with Elinor Smith. Oh. GEORGE he told you that I shut her out of the Derby. And that's true. AMELIA And when were you going to tell me? GEORGE (calm, straight) Never. I knew you'd go crazy. And I felt it needed to be done. She can scarcely believe this. AMELIA What? You think I wanted it done, but just let you do the dirty work? GEORGE I didn't say that. AMELIA Because I'm no angel. Business is competition and competition is rough, and I thank my stars that you're there making this life happen for me, but... GEORGE ou're making your life hap... AMELIA But this is different. It is. AMELIA (CONT'D) If women are going to stab women in the back, then women are going nowhere. I F T 50. Are you listening? GEORGE rom here on, I'll just stab men in he back. A MELIA You didn't do this for business, anyway. G EORGE I did it for fun? AMELIA You did it because you love me. That stops him. AMELIA (CONT'D) And when we're married, you mustn't ever... Now she stops. Because his eyes are wide. AMELIA (CONT'D) What's the big shock? I thought you wanted to get married. Full beat. GEORGE did. I do. AMELIA Well, then. His eyes moving over her face. GEORGE What about what you said? The day S will come when you run away. he nods. It will. AMELIA You'll be destroyed. And part of me will, too. And I think we both know it. And yet. AMELIA (CONT'D) Sometimes things happen that way. You're not better safe than sorry. Tears stand in his eyes. He is so happy. 51. AMELIA (a whisper) (CONT'D) Yes? GEORGE (a whisper) Hell yes. 45 45 INT. GEORGE'S MOTHER'S HOME, NOANK, CONNECTICUT - DAY Through a window, a dry, wintered garden. Snow falling, at once soft and heavy. Beyond, Morgan Point Lighthouse, Fisher's Island Sound, Long Island Sound. One lonely fishing boat braves the cold water. PULL BACK to see... ...Amelia at the breakfast table in a windowed room. She is writing, and as she does... S UPERIMPOSE: WEDDING DAY. CONNECTICUT, 1931. ...her eyes are swimming with tears. She brushes at them. Stares down at her work. Continues. ANGLE. The parlor. George, his MOTHER, the MINISTER, a small number of close FRIENDS. From the doorway, Amelia beckons George. The letter is in her hand. EXT. HOME - MOMENTS LATER 46 46 Amelia holds tight to George's hand, leading him out into the falling snow. She turns, fixes him with a look. Hands him the letter. And steps back. As if giving him space. At first, he smiles. What is this? She gestures for him to read. As he begins, there is nothing for a few seconds. Then... AMELIA (V.O.) ...I want you to understand I shall not hold you to any medieval code of faithfulness to me. Nor shall I consider myself bound to you similarly. Snow falling. Absolute silence. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) If we can be honest I think the difficulties which may arise may best be avoided should you or I become interested deeply, or in passing, with anyone else. She gazes intently, her heart in her eyes. He never looks up. M 52. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Please let us not interfere with the other's work or play, nor let the world see our private joys or disagreements. And then... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I must exact a cruel promise. And that is you will let me go in a year if we find no happiness together. He stops on this. His thoughts unreadable. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I will try to do my best in every way. And give you that part of me you know and seem to want. He folds the letter carefully. Places it in his pocket. And smiles. GEORGE y Amelia. Brutal in her frank- ness. Beautiful in her honesty. He steps to her. Looks in her eyes. They kiss. 47 47 INT. PARLOR - LATER LONG ANGLE. The minister reading the vows. The witnesses standing silent. Two black cats rubbing against George's ankles. DISSOLVE TO... INT. KITCHEN, RYE - MORNING 48 48 George at the breakfast table. His eggs and toast ignored for the moment, he's reading a magazine article. PAN to Amelia, sipping her coffee. Watching him. GEORGE (reads aloud) `Why I Believe Women Pilots Can't Fly The Atlantic. An outspoken warning by Lady Heath.' (READING) `...pure suicide for any woman today...it is madness for them to attempt it and...' He looks up to her. 53. GEORGE (CONT'D) `...at least the first dozen will be drowned.' And we're reading A this, because...? MELIA I might fly to Paris. Silence. GEORGE Which is actually across the Atlantic. AMELIA Hence, the article. Ah. He nods. AMELIA (CONT'D) I'm thinking of doing it solo. AMELIA (CONT'D) Would you mind? He butters his toast. GEORGE Not at all. When would you like to go? EXT. GARDEN, RYE - DAY 49 49 CLOSE on Amelia as she kneels, carefully putting new plants into the ground. We see patience, concentration. Contentment. After a moment... AMELIA I'm surprised you're all right with this... WIDEN ANGLE. George kneeling beside her. Happily planting his own. GEORGE Really. AMELIA Mmm-hmmn. I was braced for the lecture. Five years since Lindbergh, no one's made it solo, so many of them died. He looks at her work. Reaches over. Starts packing the earth HARDER around her plant. She just watches, then... D W 54. GEORGE ell, they were only men. This is different. She reaches to his plant and starts LOOSENING the soil... AMELIA I was waiting to hear that I'm only doing this because I was just a passenger last time, and I'd rather die than go on living as a fraud.. No one cracks a smile. It's like Laurel and Hardy in a food fight where each lets the other take his best shot. George A reaches now, starts REPACKING her soil... MELIA (CONT'D) But you don't think that, do you, ear? GEORGE Of course not. But if I did... She SMACKS his hand. He just keeps working. She finally grins, smacks him HARDER. He doesn't seem to notice. GEORGE (CONT'D) ...all the more reason to say yes. EXT. TEETERBORO AIRPORT - DUSK 50 50 AERIAL ANGLE. In the sun's last light, two figures walk slowly, far below us. The Vega waits. CLOSE ANGLE. They stand beneath the wing. Her ground crew in far distance, giving them their moment. Her look is not breezy and cavalier this time, but tender and intimate. She knows the fear beneath his easy smile. He produces a RING, a band of black fibers. GEORGE Elephant hair, I think you wear it on your toe. It's good luck. He puts it in her hand. GEORGE (CONT'D) Anyway. That's what the elephant told me. Amelia looks at the ring. Turns it in her fingers. 55. AMELIA I think luck has rules. And I try to respect them. My favorite is... She glances up. AMELIA (CONT'D) We make our own luck, you and I. Remember that. He will remember that. And more. GEORGE Do you have money? AMELIA No. He pulls out a twenty dollar bill. Hands it to her. AMELIA (CONT'D) All this? G EORGE Sure. AMELIA Thank god, I thought you were going to tear it in half. GEORGE I spent our money on ocean liner passage to go bring you back. It's non-refundable. So try to do your part. She nods. She'll try. He doesn't want to leave her yet. GEORGE (CONT'D) So the Simpkin thing. What was all that? AMELIA I put it in a letter. Which you'll get if I don't make it. So...mixed emotions, huh? He shakes his head. GEORGE (very soft) Either way, something to look forward to. She puts her hands on his face. She doesn't want to leave him either. 56. AMELIA (murmurs) Stake up the peonies, huh? They're messy when they bloom on the ground, and... And. AMELIA (a whisper) I want to see their heads high. When I come home. She leans up to kiss him. And again. Feeling in her eyes that he will never forget. AMELIA (CONT'D) See ya. INT. VEGA - NIGHT 51 51 Amelia alone. Starry night. 12,000 feet below are ICEBERGS. A single fishing boat. AMELIA (V.O.) The weather report wasn't perfect. But we knew our real chance was to take weather that others wouldn't. Ahead, towering CLOUDS in moonlight. Too high to fly over. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I closed the deal by choosing May 20, five years to the day from Lindbergh's flight. It was too good a sell for George to resist. 5 What we didn't know... EXT. VEGA - LATER 2 52 A terrifying STORM BATTERS the plane, which bobs and darts and dips like a leaf in a gale. AMELIA (V.O.) ...was that my altimeter would conk out. Never to return. INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 53 53 Amelia fights for control as the plane is TOSSED and SHAKEN. AMELIA (V.O.) The only way to have any sense of altitude, was to keep dropping toward the sea. (MORE) 57. AMELIA(cont'd) When the engines sputtered, that was my low-level limit. A sudden JOLT knocks her OUT of her seat. She scrambles back, as we see WHITECAPS A FEW FEET BELOW. She JERKS the nose UP, the engine COUGHS... ...and CLIMBS. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I was too busy to grasp how impossible the situation had become. The joke was... LATER. Flying in and out of cloud cover. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) All those months flying only with instruments, I should have been practicing without them. PAN to the windshield. A small GLOW at the surface of a vibrating engine. Amelia hasn't noticed. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I started to wonder if luck was paying me back. For thinking I knew the rules. A small BLUE FLAME LICKS out into the night. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Then I smelled burning oil. She sees it now. The flame coming through a broken weld in the manifold ring. A MELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) A bad weld, already a small flame. It would be hours back to Canada, trying to find an unlit field, landing with a heavy fuel load. She stares at the little flame. Is it growing bigger? AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I told myself, push on. After all, if it was a stupid choice... LATER. Flying in blackness. Rising, as the engines seem sluggish. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...no one would ever know. Suddenly, a FILM of SLUSH on the windscreen. 58. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) With seemingly no warning, there was ice. The controls froze. And the Vega DIVES into a DIZZYING SPIN. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Through the spin I had one thought, it would be warmer lower, the ice would melt, I just had to regain control... 54 54 EXT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT The SPINNING plane PLUNGING... AMELIA (V.O.) ...before I hit the water. And ARCING at last to SWOOP above the whitecaps. Way close for comfort. SMASH CUT TO... INT. VEGA - SAME MOMENT 55 55 Amelia REELING in her seat, her fingers FUMBLING in her flight bag, for... AMELIA (V.O.) ...or passed out. ...SMELLING SALTS, she inhales, again, blinks, starts to climb... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The ice happened twice more, and I began to lose heart. Then I remembered Lindbergh's book saying the same thing happened to him. T he sea DISAPPEARS below. Only cloud. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) So I figured, if he's twice as good, I just have to be twice as lucky... DISSOLVE TO... HOURS LATER. Amelia seriously fatigued. She breaks through cloud into DAZZLING SUNLIGHT, and blinks, blinded. 59. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) I'd read that part in George's reception room that first day. Bless him for keeping me waiting. The FUEL GAUGE reads EMPTY. She switches on the RESERVE TANK. And as she DROPS back down into opaque clouds... ...she feels something. Her fingertips go to her left shoulder, and come away... Wet. Slick. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The cockpit gauge was defective. There was a steady trickle of fuel down my neck. She looks around helplessly for a way to stem the dripping. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) Toss-up whether the bigger danger was running out of gas or going up in a fireball. I had my answer in less than an hour, when... DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Amelia beyond exhaustion. Staring fixedly at some- thing we can't see. Until we PAN through the wind screen to the leak in the manifold weld. The BLUE FLAME is startlingly LARGER, now LICKING its way along the surface of the fuselage... AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) The manifold weld began to separate. I gauged the likelihood of explosion at somewhere between probable and inevitable. 5 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - DAY 6 56 Arms folded, George stares out his window. He hasn't slept or eaten. PAN to his desk. The phone is OFF the hook. The door opens softly... SECRETARY (O.S.) Mr. Putnam? Line three. He turns and looks at her. The girl's eyes go down and he BOLTS to the phone, SNATCHES the receiver, SLAMS the button... GEORGE (into phone) Putnam. 60. A full beat. VOICE (O.S.) Sir, this is Douglas McGuire of the Press Association. I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Earhart's plane has crashed in a field, short of Le Bourget airport. SMASH CUT TO... EXT. SKY - DAY 57 57 A plane swooping downward through cloud and fog. The SOUND of George's call CONTINUES... GEORGE (O.S.) Is she all right? MCGUIRE (O.S.) If the crash is as reported, sir, I'm afraid not. There were terrible flames. LOWER, it's dropping fast, maybe too fast, WOBBLES in a crosswind, here comes the GROUND, and... GEORGE (O.S.) Are they completely sure it's her plane? MCGUIRE (O.S.) Yes sir, absolutely. ...the Vega RIGHTS itself and GLIDES in for as fine a landing as a bumpy meadow could allow. COWS look up as she rolls past, toward... ...one lone astonished FARM WORKER. She cuts her engines, leans from the hatch... AMELIA Excuse me, sir. Where am I? A blink. The truth... MAN In Gallagher's pasture. O ne more beat. MAN (CONT'D) Where are ya supposed to be? 61. AMELIA When I left, I was aiming for Paris. Oh. MAN (very sad) Ya missed, y'know. (POINTS) It's over there. EXT. NEW YORK HARBOR- DAY 58 58 MOVIETONE NEWSREEL FOOTAGE of Amelia arriving at New York Harbor to an overwhelming reception. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) Amelia Earhart arrives to a tumul- tuous New York reception after her whirlwind tour of Europe, in which our Queen of the Skies danced with her royal counterpart the Prince of Wales, before meeting both Benito Mussolini and the Pope. The MAYOR, the GOVERNOR, every dignitary that could get an invitation is there to greet her. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) The second human to fly the Atlantic solo, she is the only one ever to fly it twice. And she set the record, man or woman, for the fastest crossing. Fourteen hours 54 minutes. As she waves to the crowd... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Now it's America's turn to show our girl what we think of her! DISSOLVE TO... INT. BACKSTAGE, CONSTITUTIONAL HALL, WASHINGTON, D.C. - NIGHT 59 59 We are standing in the wings. Through the curtains, we GLIMPSE the eager, packed house in an auditorium. From the stage, a speaker DRONES, but backstage... ...George peeks out at the throng. When he looks back, we see Amelia, her troubled face. The folded newspaper in her hand. G W W 62. AMELIA (reads) `Only an average flyer, she has pushed herself to the front by following the tactics of the feminists... She looks up to him. GEORGE ell, I'm glad someone besides me finally noticed. His smile is light. Her eyes watching him. Then... AMELIA (reads) `Using a man-made perfect machine, tuned by men mechanics, trained by men flyers, on a course laid out by a man. By a lucky break she just managed to make the hop.' She stares at the paper. His voice comes gently... GEORGE hy would you even read that garbage? AMELIA Well, it reminds me how much I owe to the men of this world. Keeps me humble. GEORGE ood. And remembering how little you owe me keeps me humble. And softly... GEORGE (CONT'D) He's a crackpot. Let it go. He points to the packed hall... GEORGE (CONT'D) Cheer up. They're crazy about you. AMELIA (quiet) Well, they're crazy about something. She looks down. Self-doubt flickers. AMELIA (CONT'D) What have we really done? 63. GEORGE You've made them feel like this. AMELIA That's not enough. GEORGE Most of them are women. And for them, it's very much enough. She shakes her head. AMELIA The World Telegram said, `a magnificent display of useless courage.' GEORGE The question is. Can any magnif- icent display of courage be use- less? A MELIA The point is. Men do it every day. And no one throws a parade. Ah. Well... GEORGE One day closer, then. To the day when they won't think to throw one for you. She doesn't turn. She doesn't smile. AMELIA Reasoning with me. A magnificent display of useless courage. He nods to himself. GEORGE And. It's fun. From the stage... ANNOUNCER (O.S.) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. HAIL TO THE CHIEF strikes up. We hear the deep applause. George begins to straighten Amelia's outfit, touching her hair, as he did long ago on the Copley Hotel roof. 64. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) THE GOLD MEDAL OF THE NATIONAL GEO- GRAPHIC SOCIETY WAS LAST AWARDED FIVE YEARS AGO TO COL. CHARLES LINDBERGH. George murmurs close to her ear... GEORGE If a bomb goes off tonight, the whole government of the United States is out there... PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT HAS NEVER BEEN AWARDED TO A WOMAN... GEORGE Some dog catcher will have to become President. She smiles. Just for him. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) UNTIL TONIGHT. GEORGE (a whisper) Boy. Imagine if you'd actually done something. AMELIA (a whisper) Imagine. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) IT IS MY HONOR TO WELCOME TO CONSTI- TUTION HALL, A ROLE MODEL FOR LADIES EVERYWHERE... AMELIA Ladies. PRESIDENT HOOVER (O.S.) MISS AMELIA EARHART. M GEORGE iss. She's through the curtain, and the crowd CRACKLES with APPLAUSE as... ...George stands in the wings. Proud. And concerned. 65. 60 60 INT. TRAIN - DAY A train rumbles through countryside. A private compartment finds Amelia staring out the window. George studying her. GEORGE (V.O.) The irony is, I'd finally put that wedding day letter out of my mind. Stopped watching every beautiful accomplished man who crossed her path. REVERSE ANGLE. Through the glass of our compartment door, a crowd stands jouncing against each other. Gazing at their Queen of the Skies. GEORGE (CONT'D) I had a call from the Byrds. They've asked us to dinner Thursday. AMELIA Thursday, I'll be in Boston. Meeting Gene Vidal and Paul Collins. Said lightly. Not even looking at him. While through the glass, it's become quite a tussle. GEORGE Don't tell me Gene wants to resurrect Transcontinental? AMELIA No, he's starting a shuttle service. Washington, New York, Boston... One woman goes flying from view, as a younger one gets her place. AMELIA (CONT'D) Could be a money maker for us. Get me off the lecture grind. He stares in her eyes. Almost as if looking for something. GEORGE Gene's a dashing guy. He could talk anyone into anything. Their look holds. 66. GEORGE (CONT'D) S ounds like a great idea. DISSOLVE TO... 61 61 INT. RESTAURANT, BOSTON - NIGHT PAN the dark, elegant restaurant. In a corner by the fire- place, Amelia and her dinner companions are being served lobsters. GENE VIDAL leans to Amelia as he speaks, and she hangs on every word. GENE Transcontinental was too ambitious. Too many hops, too tough on the ladies. But the shuttle... A lean athlete's body, easy grace in every movement. Strikingly handsome features that convey not only intellect, but kindness and decency. GENE (CONT'D) Washington, New York, Boston. I think it's the future. Will you go there with us? She's trying to crack her lobster, but can't take her eyes off her host. AMELIA What on earth would you need me for? She's making a real mess of the lobster. Gene notices. PAUL COLLINS doesn't... PAUL Hasn't George taught you anything? Lady Lindy, the queen of the air, the best known woman in the entire U.S. of A? Gene reaches over, as if it were his own plate, and begins cracking her lobster for her. She looks in his eyes and tries to concentrate. PAUL (CONT'D) Gene on the poster with you. Legendary athlete at West Point, two events in the Olympics, a top pilot who should be running the skies for Roosevelt when he wins... 67. Gene looks up at Paul, as if to say: Enough. Now he smiles at Amelia. She blinks, what? Don't you want your lobster? G Oh. She starts eating... ENE (looking only at Amelia) Thanks, Paul. I think you've even talked me out of it. DISSOLVE TO... LATER. Paul has gone. Gene and Amelia are at the bar, huddled over his beer and her Coke. AMELIA (V.O.) Gene had a terrible marriage and was separated from his alcoholic adulterous wife. But he was too kind to humiliate her with a divorce... Gene drains the last of his beer. AMELIA (V.O.) (CONT'D) As a result, he was basically a single parent to their young son, Gore. He glances at his watch. Wow. GENE I'm rattling on here, and you've got a morning train. But she's just staring in his eyes. This could be her last chance to ask... AMELIA How's Nina doing? GENE Oh, fine. Really? He smiles, gently. GENE (CONT'D) Actually, she hasn't been feeling her best. She'll probably summer in Newport. So my kid's stuck with Dad again. AMELIA If you two get bored, I could tag along sometimes. 68. GENE You suggesting you're less boring than I am? AMELIA Well, yeh. He smiles first. Hers is slower, but here it comes. AMELIA (CONT'D) Any given meal, I can eat a lobster and have you boys in stitches. A full beat. He's deciding. GENE Gore would love that. He has a little crush, I'm afraid. AMELIA At seven? GENE He's eight. Well, then. He breaks the look. Fishes out some cash for the bar tab. G ENE (CONT'D) Listen, Paul and I would be thrilled to rope you into our shuttle. AMELIA Are you kidding, it's a godsend. No matter how hard George and I work, how many lectures we cram in, there's never enough money for the next adventure. He looks at her. Lets the silence sit there. His eyes seem to convey a depth of understanding. GENE The next adventure. What is it? She shrugs. No idea. GENE (CONT'D) Because we're running out of oceans. AMELIA Wish you'd do something about that. 69. GENE I'm serious, Amelia. Her soft smile. AMELIA I know. Always. GENE The only way you can stay where you are. And be who you are... Serious indeed. GENE (CONT'D) Is to keep feeding the beast. She can't smile anymore. Because this is the very fear she lives with. GENE (CONT'D) And the beast always needs something larger, greater, more daring... AMELIA (quiet) He costs money, too. GENE The price of fame, literally. Do you and George talk about this? Silence. AMELIA We don't have to. GENE With all respect. Yes, you do. 62 62 INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - LATER Walking together down the hallway of her hotel. No one speaks. Their thoughts are their own. She reaches her room, finds her key. Opens the door, and... ...turns to him. A brief, direct look. She reaches one hand gently behind his head. Leans up. K isses his mouth. AMELIA (a whisper) Thank you. His eyes question. T T H 70. AMELIA For understanding. There is no smile. Without a word, she goes into her room. CLOSES the door behind her. e stands alone. Do I knock on that door? Then, smiles to himself, and simply... Walks away. DISSOLVE TO... INT. BANQUET HALL, WASHINGTON - NIGHT 63 63 Crowded hall, each table ringed by diners in formal dress. At a table of honor, George sits next to Elinor Smith, chatting comfortably. PAN to the head table... GEORGE (V.O.) After Roosevelt won, his wife Eleanor brought the advancement of women to national attention with stunning success. CLOSE on ELEANOR ROOSEVELT, eating heartily, chatting, laughing with a companion we don't see until... GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) A gutsy gal who rode a bobsled in he Winter Olympics, spent hours each morning on horseback, and carried a pistol on car trips. She possessed boundless energy, a towering intellect... ...we reveal Amelia in a formal satin dress at her side, dishing with the First Lady like the closest of girlfriends. GEORGE (V.O.) (CONT'D) ...and was Amelia's idol. As it happened, she was obsessed with flying, making Amelia her absolute heroine. A MELIA So he hasn't actually forbidden you. ELEANOR Franklin doesn't forbid. He just feels it's a waste of my valuable ime to learn. Since I can't afford to buy a plane. I I T O 71. They share a look of such mutual understanding, neither has to smile. AMELIA The wrong Roosevelt got elected. ELEANOR And it will take at least four years | satisfactory | How many times the word 'satisfactory' appears in the text? | 0 |