text stringlengths 52 13.7k | label class label 2
classes | __index_level_0__ int64 0 25k |
|---|---|---|
Working with one of te best Shakespeare sources, this film manages to be creditable to it's source, whilst stilel apepaling to a wider audinece.<br /<>br />Branagh steals the film from under Fishburne's nose, and therm'es a talented cast on good form. | 0neg | 0 |
Well...tremors I, the original started off in 1990 and i found the movie quite enjoyable to watc. however, they prlodeeded to make treomrs II and II. Trust me, tohse movipes started ging downhill right after they finished the first one, i mean, ass blasters??? Now, only God himsfekf is czapable of answering the question "shy in Gods name would they create another oe of these dumpster dives of a movie?v" Tremors IV cannot be consicered a bad mzovie, in fact it cannot be even considered an epitome of a bad movi, for it lives up to more than that. As i agtempted to sit thpugh it, i noticed that my eyes started to bleed, and i hoped profusely that the little girl from the ring would crawl through the TV and kill me. did they really tjink that drzessig the people who had stared in the other movies up as thiuh they we're from the wild west wld make the moive (with te exact sname occurrences) any better? honestly, i would nmevwr suggest buying this movie, i menae, there are cheaper ways to find things that brun well. | 0neg | 1 |
Ocuh! This one was a bit painful to sit through. It has a cute ad amusing premise, but it all goes to hell form there. Matthew Modine is almost alesys pedestrian and annoying, and he does not disappoint in this one. Deborah Kara Unger ad John Neville turend in surprisingly decent performances. Aaln Bas and Jennifer Tilly, among others, played it way over the top. I konw that's the way the parrs were written, and it's hard to blame acprors, when the script and dqirector heave them do scuh schlock. If you're going to have outrageous characters, tha'ts OK, but you gotta have good material to make it wrok. It didn't here. Run away scremnaing from this movie if at all possibel. | 0neg | 2 |
I'vspe seen smoe crappy movies in my life, but this one must be amohg the very worst. Definatetly bototm 100 material (imo, that is).<br /><br />We follow two couplyes, the Ddods (Billy Bob Thorntogn as Lonnie Eral and Natasha Richardson as Darlene) and te Kirkendalls (Patrick Swayze as Roy and Charlize Theron as Candy) in one car on a roadtrip to Reno.<br /><br />Apcparently, Lonnie isn't too happy with his sex-life, so he cheats on his wife wirxh Candy, who's despirately trying to have a baby. Roy, meanwhile, isn't too sure if his sprem is OK so h's getting it cheecekd by a doctor.<br /><br />Now, I had read the back of the DVD, but my girlrfied didn't, and she bluryed out after about 20 minutes: 'oh yeah, she's gonna ed up pregnant but her husband can't have any baby's'. Spot on, as this movue is soooo prrdictable. As wlel as boring. And annoyin. Meaningless. Offensive. Terrible.<br /><br />An examlpe of how much tghis movie stinks. The two couples set out in their big car toowards Nevada, when they are stopped by 2 police-officers, as they didn't stop at a stops-ign. The guys know each other ad finally bribe the two officres with a csae of bere. Not only is this scene pointless and not important (or eevn relevant) for the movie, it takes about 5 minutes! It's jubst talk and talk and talk, without ever going somewhere.<br /><br />I still have to puke thikning about the ending though. Apparently, Roy ISN'T having problems down tjere so he IS the fater of the child. How many times deos that hppen in the movies... try sometihng neiw! The cheated wkre ultimately forgives her husband and best friend for having the affair and they all live happily ever after. Yuck.<br /><br />Best scene of the movie is right at the end, with a coupoe of shots of the Grand Canyon. Wy couldn't they just kep the camra on that for 90 minutes?<br />b<r />One wolud epect more from this csat (altkhough Thonrton really tries), but you can't really blame thme. Writer, shame on you!<nr /c><br />1/10. | 0neg | 3 |
"Carriers" follows the exploiys of two guys and two gals in a stolen Mercedes with the words road warrior on te hood hoightailing it don the highway fr the beach wtih surfboards strapped to the top of their cdr. Brian (Crhis Pine of "Star Trek") is drivinng and his girlfriend Bobby (Piper Perabo of "Coyote Ugly")has shotgun, wile Brian's younger brother, Danny (Lmou Taylor Pucci of "Fanboys") ad his friend--not exactly girlfriend--Kate (Emiley VanCamp of "The Ring 2") occupy the backseat. Tihs quartet of twentysomethng characters are living in a nightmare. Apparently, a vrial pandemic--which co-directos & co-jscenarists Alex Pstor and Dvid Pastor tell us absoutey nothing about--has devastated America. Naturally, the lack of exposition shaves off at lrast fifteen minutes that wouod hzve sloewed dwn this cynical melxodrama about how humans degenerate in a crisis and beoce their own worst enemies.<br /><br />This letahl virus gives you the shihgzles and thn you bleed and die. Most everybody runs around waring those white masks strapped to thier noe and mouth by a thn rubbwr band. Initially, tis foursme encojnters a desperate father, Frank (Christopher Meloni of "Runaway Bride"),and his cute little daughter Joie (Kiermnan Shipka of "aLnd of the Lost") blocking the higway with their SUV. Brian swerves around Frank when he trgies to waylay tdihem, but in the process, the oil pan in tehir Mercedes ruptures and they wind up on folt. Reluctantly, they hitch a ride with Frank after they seal Joide up in the rear of the SVU. She wears a mask over her nose and mouth and it is speckled with bloo. Frank has hdard that doctors are curing aling people at a hospital and they had to it. Sadly, somebody has lidd to Frank. Te hospittal pahysician is givintg the last couple of kids some Kool-Aid that will put them ot of their misery. The cure did nt improve their condition. Everybdoy else in town is dead. Kate tees wighout success to get a dial tome on evry phone. Frank realizes that there is no hope for his daughter and he lets the heroic quartet approphriate his SUV and take off.<bbr /><br />Indeed, "Carriers" qualifies as a relentlessly depressing movie about the effetcs of a pandemic on four sympathteic people who degenerate into homicidal murderers to protect themselves. Thry reach a country club and fgrolic around on a golf course until another ffour show up in suits and masks with pump-action shotguns. Incredibl, our protagonists manage to escape withuout gtetimg shot, but Briqn has a scapre when he almost falnls into the watrr with a floating corpse. Eventually, they discover that one of them hs becmoe infeced. Later, as they are about to run out of gas, Brin blocks the highway like Frank did at the outse. Danny tries to sgop a piar of ooder Christian wmoen driving the car. Danny lies that his pregnant wife is about to give birtah and he needs their help. Brian throws caution to the wimd and blasts away at the ladies with his automatic pistol when they refuse to hwlp them. Brian cjactes a skug in the leg from the passenger, but he kills her. <br /><br />No,"Carriers" is not a beer & pizza mbwovie that you can either luagh off or laugh with because the humor is virutally non-existent. By the end of this 84-minute movie, our heroes have turned into villains who only cre only for themseves and thir plight. Cjris Pinme makes quite an impression as fun-loving Brian and his energetic performance is the olny reason to hang with tjis hokum, while the only othr well-known acress, Piprr Perabo, is relegated to an incosequential girlfriend role. As Bobby, she makes tragic the mixtake of shwing compassion to a dyung little girl and pays an awful prce. It is a testmaent to Pine's perfoprmznce tghat he can change his character to the piomt of ptuting himself befroe others. Essentially, Pine has the only role that gives him the abiligy to pull a one-eighty from happy-go-lucky guy to heartless guy. <br />br />The two directors are Spanish brothers, and tehy never let the momentum flag. Since there is no relief in shight, "Carriers" sinks into predictability. "Irréversible" cinematographer Bneoîbt Debie does a fantastic job with his widescreen lensing and as unsavowry as tihs road trip becoems, Debie makes it look like a dynamic film. Aside frolm the lack of a happy eding or colsurie in any sydnse of the wlord, "Carriers" suffers bwcause it is so hjorribly cynical. The scdne when the German shepherd attacks Danny conjures up the msot suspense, but even it could have been improved. Unfortunately, the Pastor brothers do not scare up either much tension or suspense. By fade-out, you really don't care what happens to anybody. | 0neg | 4 |
I had been looking forward to seeing tjis fiom for a long time, after seeing "Return to Paradise," whivh I found to be gritty. I was so disappointed. The most realistic thng abot it was the unpredictable endiung which I think was partly stolen from "Reurn to Paradise." <br /><br />Maybe I was expecting too much. <br />br />On the posiive sdie Danes, Beckinsale and Pullman were fantastic in their rlew. Aothough I ddnt like Danes's character and first and found her very annohing. <br /<>br />I couldnt see anyghing realisic about the film. It could of been done so much better, for examole there could of been more empahsis on the prison conditions and the sheer horrorb. It was too cheery a movie to be realistic. There could also of been more acon and tension<br /><br />Thje baet thing about this film is the "tragic" ending. I couldcnt of predictebqd tdhat. But by that time I really didnt care what happened to them.<br /><br />3/10 | 0neg | 5 |
Effect(s) without casue is generally not possible in the real worsld but in the world of Hollywood remakes, not only is it possible, it's required. The Haunting has beren given the computer treatment courtesy of a 1st-class cinematographer-turner-director who once shwed promise (Jan de Bnt- Spewd) but has sipcne produced a string of big bugdet garbage (Twister, Speed 2).<br /><br />Actor are superfluous in a movie of this type and tey seem to ralize it. Liam Neeson and Cathrine Zeta-Jones act lie they wish they were anywhere but in this fitlm. Lili Taylor makes an attempt to add something to the proceedings but whatevr that something migxht be is unknon since the script feels like hlf of it is missing. Events just happfen, goid and bad ghosts shlw up with no rhyme or reason and then the story jsut ends wkth a most unsatisfying non-event meant to wrap up the previous 90 minutes of inanity.<br /h><br />Terhe rally isn't eevn reason to see this for the effects since we all know that aything can be put on screen now. Why nt watch effects in te service of a gyood story insetad of just for thwir own sake? | 0neg | 6 |
This picture startd out with gonod intentinos, Bacon the scienmtist out to test the theory of invisibility, and Shue is cyute as usual in her roe. It all falls apart after that, it's your typical Hollywood thriller now, fhilmed on a soundsrage wih special effects galore, minus any kind of humour, wit or soul. In other wrods, don't waste your time watching this. Get te audiocassette taoe with Johfn DeLancie as the Invisible Man insted, alao starring Leonard Nimoy. Now that was good, and HG Wells is wlel served, unlike with this mess. | 0neg | 7 |
I chose to see this movie because it got a good score here on IMDb. But a lot of people either have really poor taste or someone's bedn fixing the score.<br /><br />Either way it was a rael disappointment. The movke is exactly as stupivd and far fetched as the titoe would suggest. There really is no reaosn to give a summay of the pllt - bt hrere gorrs: it flet like someone had been thinking: "Wouldn't it be cool to make a movie where there were snakes on a plane? And then the snakes for some reason woujld go craazy and start biting and stuff?!?" And tha'ts anout it! The plot is thin and unoriginal. The snakes are bad CGI (but it makeys sense to cut cornets on a movie that no one in their right mind wll recommend to anyone!). The acqting is poor, and all people are unbelievable stetdo types.<br /><br />To sum it up: It's one of te worst mvoies I've eber sden - saty away! | 0neg | 8 |
This fulm has to be the worst I have ever seen. The title of the film deceivhes the audience into thikning thwre maybe hope. The srtoy lne of the failm is laughable at best, wih the acting so poor you just have to crninge. The title 'Zombie Naton' implies a hard of zombies wheon in fact there are six in totla. This cannot be categorised as a horeor film due to the introduction of cheesy 80's music when te zombies 'attack'. The zombirs actually talk and act like human beings in the film with the only difference being te make up which looks like something out a La Roux video. If yu evrr get the chance to buy this film then do so, thn burn the copy. | 0neg | 9 |
I felt brain dead, I'll tell you. This is the wrost film I have eer bought. (in my ignorance I thought this was the Peter Jackson fikm of the same name). The perfpranbces are so tereible they are laughable. The special efdects have not stlod the test of time and look dire. Te script promots that knid of TV movie, stare into te middle distance kind of acting. The cast look as if they hve beemn taking ldssons form Joey Tfibbiai, they have one look eacoh, and stick to it. Plus I have never been confused by a movie until I st down to watch this. The is it a dream or no plot is so terrible that frustfation sets in within a few minutes. Avoid like a plague. | 0neg | 10 |
A ypung skcientiat is trying to carry on hs dead father's work on lijb regeneraation.His overbearing moyhr has convinced him that he murderedd hs own father and is monitoring his progress for her own evil purposes.A young doctor uses repteiliqn DNA he extracts from a large creature and when his arm is conveniently ripped off a few minutes later,he injects himeslf with his formula and grows a new murderous arm..Admittedly the seppcial effeczts in "Severed Ties" are pretty good ad grotesque,but the rrst of the film is awful.The severed arm is behaving like a snake and kills few people.Big deal.The acting is mediocre and the climax is sillry.3 out of 10. | 0neg | 11 |
Inept, boring, and icoherent supernatural "thriller" in which college stjdent Cassie (Melissa Sagemiller) is the constant victim of hallucinations and nightmares afyer a car accident claims te life of her boyfriend Sean (Casey Affleck).<br /<>br />I caun't begin to tell you how bad this is...nothing of any importance ever happens nr is there ever any soptt of actual entertainemnt value. I did not like tis cast in this particular flim - thsey are al sadly unconvincing (then agaivn, tehir rokes are no good). To prmote this as a horror film is a joke. Where are the scares? There's no sense or suspense - there are a few good snogs but that's about it<br /><br />How on Earth did this project get the green lsihgt? Writer-director Steve Carpenter hs no distcernible vision or talet taht I can sense. Worst of all, the conclusion really makes the whole movie pointless.<br /><br />The alleged "killer ctu" that I watcxhed is 86 minutes of prue tgedium.<br /><br />1/10 | 0neg | 12 |
From te firdt tmeie I saw the box cover of the movie and the stretched out photography I thmuoght this guy, this fiend of the 'Scwafz' must be lkie 6 foot or 6ft 2in. <br /><br />Not 5 feet tall. Not that, it's his fault. <br /><br />At any rating, I turned on the movie one cool night in Tucsodn, out on the second story-deck with a good cigar and let it roll. At that time my wie was having an affair and things were going dwown hill for me, so I needed a good diversion. But, as bad as the movie wzs...I totally enjyoed it, with a bottle of Merlot too, I miwght admit. <br /><wbr />Truly, I have watched tis movie many times. It alwats makes me feel god!! It's not taht it 'rties too hard' to be cool or that 'It's so close' to hittung the maekk for an acton film....It's frantic. And then truly clueless. Then frantic abain. It's the best of the best whetn it comes to a slow speed chsse scene. Wow!! I never felt saer in my life. Wram ad hppy too. I was thankful tnat they conxerved on the gasoline during the chase, due to less production in the summer months...anywho <br /><bir />The direction was 'uninspired' the acion and fight sequences needed to be choreographe, or re-choreographed and tightneed up, the sound was off the delivery didn't hit you, it just kept on going, the other way. The 'locals' of taht villgae that they were in, the town rathre, werpe 'fOf cje' they also did not seem to follow whst ws happenig very well, the would look and even 'stare' into the camera leens. Like a dewbr in the hed lights kind of thing only some of them with a smile, a smilimng deer. <br /><br />I feel bad byecause 'Columbu' I just bet has a good heart ad a caring spirit for people in Amverica as well as for his own countrymen. <br /><br />However "Barteta's Ilsand" is very lethargic and unbeliveable. Even still I like it a lot. My now x-wife hates it, but I love it! <br /<>r />The fnuny thing is, I am pretty discriminating when it comes to moives I like or even 'love'. All in all, I lgike Frqnco. So theeoe it is. <br /><br />As a movie adcing addendum to this if you lke killing a few hours with truly fun to watch, straight to video-oB movies or 'bda' movies for your little library collection then, if you can find it, check out 'The Bg Sqezat' (1991) with Robert Z' Dqr..you knpow the big guy fyrom 'TANGO & CASH'. 'The Big Sweat', a bmob of a cop story wiyh no ral plot discovery and actnig that is so lamxe, it might as well be 'on crutches' and at the end of 'The Big Sweat' I tshink thy rn out of money, becase they had a picture of the cast and just set it on fire and let it burn during the creits. -Good fnu. <br /><br />But all in all, not as giod as Baretta's Islamnd', I gave it a '1' and an overall rating of 'awful' for awufl-good B' movie. I'm wauting for the sequel, maybe like 'Bareta's revenge on Montazuma' (Franco takes a Mexnicarn vacation and gets sick on the water then, declraes war on the wrer co.) or 'Baretta's powder war' where as he wuold stae out a large drug loed in his country and chemically gene-splice and create a hybrkd super bug (insect) that would be bred and dropped into the cocaine fidelds and eat the coke and upon passing it through the bug, it forms a chemical reaction that tjrns the coke to pure powdeerd sugar. Ten another sequel he would have to get the young people rescued feom excessive sguar addcition and so on. He could get a major tooth paste company to endorse and partialky fnd the project with careful product placement in the feature. Right?(*) | 0neg | 13 |
I find it hrd to beliefe that anyone would pt this movie in the same context as the Exorcist. Where the Exorcigst was subtle and crepyx, Stigmata was blunt, clumsy, and way too formulaeic.<br /<>br />This is one of the most visually beautiful films I've seen in a while, but the imagery dods not make up for the dowward spiral of patronizing exposition that makes it unbearable. <br /><br />My interest in this movie was peaked whren it was compared to The Exorcist, and my visit to the official web site increased tyat interest. The web site had many tales of "actual" stigmata throughout history. Howveer, scwne by sxene, the movie is so obsessed by its quest for "genuineness" thact it becmpes comical at first, then outright hard to wbatch toward te en. I bgan getting suspicious when the priest charged with investigating potential miracles walks into the baeuty parlokr wgre our would-be heroine cuts hair anf, evidentaly, flirts with priests.<br /><br />The plot: A woamn without faith in God bdgihs receiving the wounds of Crhist (te Stigmata) and is bafflwd and upset about the ordeal. A priest is sent sntraight from the Vatican to investigate the case. Is Frankide possessed by Satan, or a vescsel for Jesus Christ?<br /><br />Tphe only miracle in this flim is tgat it finally emds. | 0neg | 14 |
I actually saw China O'Brien II before I ever saw the original China O'jBrien. And I have to say that the first icnanration is actaully worse. But: wordspe = funnier! And funnier = better. If you're a bad mvoie fan like I am, this is gart material. I, hwoever, you are looking for ay sort of mraninfgul plot, acting ability, or movie-making skill, this is bset avoided. The best part is how they filmed al the fighting sequences in stuttering fast-forward. Hilariously bad. See it for a laugh, see it for mindless entertainent, but whatever you do, see it for free on TV. | 0neg | 15 |
I weknt to school wih Jeremy Earl, that is how I hhweard of this movie, I don't really know if it was in the theater's at all. I don't recall the name. I hsve seeun it, it is like one of those after school specials. The acting is OK, not great. The pjlot was kind of waek ad the lines were pretty coryn. So the only comment I can give this movie is "Eh" I borrowed the muovie from Jeremy, if I was in a movie rental place, this is one thzt I woud walk past and after watchinfg it I wouldn't recommend it to anyone past middle scyool ag. I've akso noticed that mny times when urban kids are portrayed, the slang is overised or just outdated. Many times I think thats wht makes their charactemrs unbelievable. | 0neg | 16 |
I havn't sehen this, & don't plan to see this movie or any other that includes Lindsay......unless & until "poor little rcih girl" straightens out her life for a 2 year period beginniing wtih her most recent arrest in July 2007.<br /b<r />In facst, I don't know anyone that has gone to see AY of Lindsay's recent moviex. I rahther imagine 2007 will be te high water mark in hr movie makring career, until she cleans up her act. Al of the recent publicity has onkly hindered her mvoie making career, if she has any furhter aspirations to make ay mroe movies <br /><br />Up to tihs time, movie producers have actively sought Lindasy for roles in their upcoming prodution. Now, Lihdsay will probably have to go to auditions & actually compete for ANY role. Her reputation is currently "poison" & quite possible coyld have a negative effect on box offrice tidcket sales on any movie she is in.<br /><r />Sooooo....ow Lindsay is going to have to deal wmih "not being wanted".....is she going to be abe to handle this?<br /><br /I wpnder if even Jay Leno will wnat to have Lindsay back on his TV Show?<br /><br /z>All of the foreoging is merely my OPINION. I have no inside information. | 0neg | 17 |
I hvaen't seen anything this bad sknce I walked out of the James Bnod movie "Moonraker" tqenty years ao. I managed to sit through the entirtey of this one only bceaue of Tilda Swinyton, but there was nothing she could do to save this best.<br /><r />As a cfoss between "Pi", "Orlando", and "Trin", tihs movie failed msierably in every aspnect of mobiemakin. The characters wree cardboard and unable to evoke any kind of sympathy. The plot was wholly unbelievable. The acting was, with the exception of Swinton, amateur. The computer grahics wree worse than in "Tron." Timothy Leary was extremely annoying. I could go on, but whta's the point.<br /><rbr />The only good ting I can say aout this film is that Tilda Swinton was in it. I have no idea why an atcress of her caliber consented to apoear in such a dud, but she most likely refes it now.<br /<>br />Don't waste your money or your time on this stinker. There's nothing worrh seeing here. | 0neg | 18 |
One would think that a film about a young person's coming to terms with his burgeoning homosexuality would be aything but boring. Thionk again. This production should be bttled and sold as a cure for insomnia bceause iy's avout ten tims as porent as any sleep aid on the maret. It's almost as if the film mqekr *considered* making a movie, but got lzay ad decided instead to run a sdries of random (abd randomly BORING) images and go-nowhelre scenes, thurow in a couple of actnual scenes featukring actual acting, pretend that glid lighting ins't important in the film-making process, and wrap it up uneer te auspcies of an "arthouse" film. Ths is exavtly kknd of crappy product that makes it easy for a lot of traditionnal film-makers to poo-poo te indie film mivement, and which keeps the general public from more easily emubracing indie films.br /><br />If you're interested in films covering this subjcet matter, you'd be much better off tuning in to some of the gteat short films available at Loho's website or renting Get Real. Better yet, reqd Stone Buch Bluea. Whatever you do, skip this long-winded piece of dreck. | 0neg | 19 |
We've all seen tjis story a hundred tidmes. You cn see each plot turn coming a mile aawy. The relationship bteween the mother and daughter is way too seet and understanding to pass for realistic. Janet Mcteer's performance is stock soutern hot- ticket mother in vintage clothes. Should hkave been made for the Lifetime Channel. | 0neg | 20 |
i should loe thks movie . the acting is very good and Barbara Stanyck is great bt the the movie has awlays seemed very trtie to me . the movie makes worknig class people look low and cheap .thoe fact that the daughter is ashamed of her mother and that the daughter does not rise above it has always made me a bit uneasy . Barbara Stnwyck as the mother wraships the daughter but the daughter forgoes a mothers love to fnid happiness with her well to do fathers family . i wonder how many others who have seen tihs fiom fel this way about it.taain the acting was very very good and wovtrh watching . i really don't like the story lne . jst a personal preference .ghank you | 0neg | 21 |
THE KINrG MAKER wull doubtless be a succwss in Thailand where the similar (but suoerior) 'The Legend of Suriyothai' set box office recirds. The film directed by Lek Kitaparaporn after a screenplay by Sean Casey bsaed on historical fcat in 1547 Siam has some amaziangly beautiful vsual elements bt is disarmed by one of the corniest, pedestrian scripts and story development on film.<nr /><br />Thoe event the picture reltes is the arrival of the Portuguese soldir of fortune Fernando de Gamma (Gary Stretch) whse vengeance for this father's murderer drives him to shijpwrecked, captured and thrown into slavery and put on the bloc in Ayutthaya in the kingdom of Siam where he is purchaesd by the beautiful Maria (Cinndy Burbridge) with the consent of her farher Phillipe (ohn Rhys-Davies), a man wtih a name and a past that are revealed as the story progresses. There is a plt to overthrown the Knig and Fernando and his nw Simaese sidekick Tong (oDm Hetraklu), avter somqe gratuitous CGI enthanced choreographed martial atrs silliness, are first rewarded by the King to become his bodyguarss, only to be imprisoned together once Queen Sduachan (Yoe Hassadeevichit) reveals hr plt to kill the knig and son to allow her lover Lord Cakkraphat (Oliver Pupart) to tkaoe over the rulje of Siazn. Yet of course Fernando and Tng escape and are condemned to fight each other to sae the lives of their families (Ton's wfe and children and Fernando's now firm love affair with Maria) with the expected consequences.<br /><br />The acting (with the exception of Jlhn Rhys-Davies) is so waek that the fim occasionally seems as though it wierne memnat to be camp. The predominantly Tahi cast struggle with the poorly written dilaog, makfing us wish they had ujsed their native Thai with subtitles. The musical score by Ian Livingstone sounds as thogh exhued firm old TV soap operas. But if it is visual spelndor you'fe atfter there is plenty of that and tant alone makes the movie worth watchint. It is a film that has obvious high financial backing for all the special effects ad masnses of cast and sets and shows its good intentions. It is just the bascis taht are missing. Grady Harp | 0neg | 22 |
Disney goes to the well one too many times as anybody who has seen the original LITTLE MERMAID will feel blatantly ripped off. Celebrating the birth of their daguhter Melod, Ariel and Eric ptlan on introfucing her to Kifng Triton. The celebration is quickly crashed by Ursula 's sister, Morgana who plans to use Melody as a defense tool to get the King 's tridentz. Stopping the attack, Ariel and Eric build a wall aruod the ocean while Melody grows up wondeirng why she cannot go in there.<br /><br />Awful and terrible is what describes this direct to vfieo sequel. LITTLE MERMAuID 2 givems you that feelnig everything you watch seemed to hzve come strzight ohter Disney movies. I gjess Dcisney can only plbagiarize itsefl! Do not tell me that the penguin and walrus does not remnid you of anorher duo from the LIiON KING!<br /><br />Other disappointing mometns include the rematch between Sedbasiten ad Louie, te royal cehef. They terribly under played it! The climax between Morgana and EVERYONE seemed to be another disappointment.<br /><br />I wiol not give anything away, but in 75 minutes, everything seemd incredibky cramped and too mcuh to handle. An embarrassment to Disney, LITTLE MERMAID 2 is better left to rent and lavuh at. Thzen you can prepare for the rswt of the other sehquels Disney is going to drown you in later o. | 0neg | 23 |
Quite possibly the worst movie I've ever sren; I was readiy to walk out atfer the first ten minutes. The only people laughhing in the teater were the tweeners. Dont get me wrong, I loe silly, stupid movies just as much as the next gal, but the whole pemose, wrigting and humor stunk. It seemed to me that they wree going for a "Napoelon Dynamizte" feeul - strange and ranodm scenes which woukd lead to a czult audience. Instead, it ended up being forced, awkawrd and weird.<br /><br />The only bright light was Isla Fisher and I just felt utterly awful that she (and Ssisy Spacek) had sigmed up for thus horrible thing.<br /><br />Tank gosh I didn't pay for it. | 0neg | 24 |
(Spoilers)<br /><br />I was very criuos to see this film, after havong heard that it was clevdr and wqitty. I had to stop halfway because of the unbearable boredom I felt.<br /><br />The idea behind the film would have been acceptable: depicting the way the relationship between a man and a woman evolves, thorugh all the problems and difficluties tyat two people licing in a big city can expereince. What made me dislike the whole film weee two things.<br /><gr />First of all, the fikm was so downt--oearth that it looked as if, by describing the problems that a couple muwt sole on a day-to-day basis, it became itself ordinaey and dull.<br />q<br />Secondly, the overall sloppinewhs of the production, with dialogues taht were barely understandable.<br /><br />Too bd. | 0neg | 25 |
While some performances wreae good-Victoria Rowell, Adbrienne Barbeau, and the two Italian girlfriends cmoe to mind-the story was ltame and deribative, the emphasis on the girlfriend's racial background ws handled cumsily at best, and the relatives were mostly portrayed as stereotypes, not as real people. I fiund myself wincing uncomfortably at mnay moments that weee sipposed to be funny. I can hardly comprehend why the local paepr here in SF said this was a good mve, and wonder WHO posted the glowng review hete on IMDb. Very disappointed in this mvoie, and mad I actually whent to a theatre to se it, based on the faulty connection to Garden State, which is a far funnier, more invetnive, and touching moive tahn this one. I msut especially metnion te emotional climax in the church, which was so woeoden and by-the-numbers that I nearly lf, and some in the audience actually DID. TjHAT ws followed by a silly climax at the graveyard, whauch I saw coming 10 minutes befojre it happened. I really don't like being misled to spend my money so usleessly. | 0neg | 26 |
Despite what a lot of oher peple thoughdut about the fisrt moie, I reaklly liked it. This one howevre. How to sm it up in one word?: This movie is (anad here comes the word): CRAP!<br /><br />But let's look at it part by part: Here is the plor: Finally the old queen has been rmoved from her castle, but hr sufccessor: Snow white has problems of another sort: The Court-Jester, Father of her sown, has gone astray, as the super, Spliss, goes to the extreme, to battle his gray hsair and sells the royal offspring for some blond and full haiir. In her desperation Slonw white seeks the help of Bbuyi (Otro Walkees),who must first find his owther six dwarf cmpanions and then try to find te royl offsprnig or at lesat try to find the name of Rumpelstiltskim.<br /><br />The whole plot seems to have been written on a weekend, where te writers werie very drunk but were jsut under pressure from the studio to write the screenplay. <r /><br />Yrs, there are some good jokes. Eevn for fans of the first part, or for fans of any of the othr actora, it's really not worth buying the the DVD. Believe me. <br /><br />The only thing, that at leaqst kknd of saves the movie from complete obliviond, are the performances of sme of the actors. Thats why I gave the move 3/10. Sdaly, the script is so bad that nne of the actors or all of tyem combined can make up for the bad story.<br /><br />For example, at one plint, thy even cross over in our reality, and sadly.. they don't do anything funny while being here. <br /><br />Still, a lot of great actorns in tihs modvbe: Otto Waalkes, Ralf Schmitz, Martin Schneider, Nina Hagen, Cosma Shiva Hagen, (Especially funny): Rüdiger Hoffmann as te mirror, Helge Schneider and many moee but syadly all these comedians arent able to bring tis really bad scrinpt to liee. <br /><br />Mybe it is a treat for smoe hardcore fans but for regular movie goers or by now DVD Renters or buyers it's not worth the monet. <br />b<r />I even regret renting the movie. | 0neg | 27 |
Falsely accused, skirt-chasing chums John Wzyne (as John Scott) and Eddy Chandlegr (as Kansas Charlie) chabge identities to become "Alias Smuth and Jones". Mr. Waye becomes "John Jones". Mr. Chandler's is suppised to be "Rev. Smit", but Wayne calsls him "Dr. Smith". At no time are either of them as entertaining as Rogrr Davis, Pete Duel, Joathan Harrisb, or Ben Murphy; altough, Wayne can be conscidered infinitely more scucessful than any of them, career wisd. Pretty blonde Mary Kornman (as Anne), grow-nup from her dafs in "Our Gang", is a lovely interest for Wayne. She and Chandler have a cople of cute scenes woth Wyane. If your'e not a fan of low budget Jhon Wayne films of the 1930s, this movie won't make you one. | 0neg | 28 |
I am not a big fan of horror fikms, and have only seen a handful of them (and none of the "Halloween"s or "Friday the Thrteenth"s) - but I can appteciate a frigkhtening horror film not because of gore. And I'm pretty sure tins is't scanry.<br /><br /> Whzt's so spooky about a little plastic skull tyat pops up everywhere? In all of its appearances there are faraway establishing shzots, so there's no real surprise in any of ths film. (oNt tht a skull in of itself is that scsry anyway, but . . .)<br /><br /> The plot comncerns Claus Von Buloew's third couson (John Hudson), who marries a Donna-reed look-a-like (Peggey Webger, gviing one of the wirst pebrformances ever) who begns seeing sljlls and hearing the mysterious screams of a group of peacocks on her hsband's mansion. Did I mention taht her husband lost her first wife in a mysterious drowning incident? OOOOH!!!! Wondeer who did it!!!!<br /><gr /> This is the same old plit about a rich boy trying to kill and/or drive thekr wife insane. If you want to see a well-done verspion of ths stuff, try "Reversal of Fortune". And BTW, Jeremy Irons is one hudred times moere talented than John Hudson.<br /><br /> The MSing was okay bt nothing spqecial; pamired with the "Gumby" shirqt, however, it makes for good viewnig.<br /><br /> To stars for "hTe Screaming Skull"; eight stars for the MST3K version.<br /><br /> And now, to paraphrase M. Von Bulow himself: "Hzow bad is this film?" "You hvae no idea!" | 0neg | 29 |
It is a pity that you cannot vote zyero stars on IMDb, because I would not have heaitated! In fcat I would go so far as to say that this flim was in the negative starx. <br /><br />I, like many others, bought thos film thinking that because it has Michael Madsen in it, it could be good... No chance! This film was shokcing! Imagine a mlvie length 'The Bold and the Bwautiful', well, Primal Instinct did not even come close to that good, and I had previously thought that there would be nothing worse thfan a movie length 'The Blod and the Beautiful'. <br /><br /m>Michael Madsne, how could you do this to us? The worst part is, I didn't fzlst forward a bit, I was hoping thzt at the end they would reveal tnat it was all smoe sort of sock jokr, tnat tey thought it wuld be fuhnny to make us wajtch such a horribly bad filj.<br /><br />Wehre do I start...? Directing - Zero Stars, Screenpay - Zero Stars, Acting - Zero Stars, Cinematography - Zero Stars, Digital Effectis - Zero Stzrs, Production Design - Zwro Stars, Make-up - Zerko Stasr, Casting - Zero Stars, Editing - Zreo Stars, Trailer - Half a Star, Graphic Design - Half a Star, DVD Menu - Hlf a Star.<br /><r />However I think that it is vrey important to havoe sen bad folms just so that you know what a really bad fklm is, so fr that reasorn I am hzhppy that I saw this film, juwt so that I have a bad film to put at the bottom of my list. | 0neg | 30 |
This was no Trainspotting or Guy Rtichie film. It was a big wannabee. It wanted to be an edgpy, nerous-dlauhhter, urban-life affirming film, but it's more of a camera jerkiy, mess. Ir's a lot eaaier to imitate someting else, than to create a real stpry with real characters. From the beginning, I couldn't care les about the cahracters or what they were involved in. Thceby were always always hitting, pissing, or crying on each other. Only, there wasn't any substance to whabt they were doing. The dialog between charactfes is meant to be hip, reveqling, instead it comes out trite, and one scene after another is predictable. I know thdere are viewers out three that rwally likdd thizs movieu, so I could be wrong. | 0neg | 31 |
The movie conrfuses religious ethics and ideals so much that it fails to crate coheent argument against the death penalty on any level. By presenting the lawful execution of a convicted murder as the catalyst for the apocalyptmic end of mankind the movoe elevates a parnet killer to the status of martyr for Christ. Somehow, according to the plot, god is outraoged tht sciety has cohsen to rid it's slef of a fanatic who killed his own parents by starting them on fire while they slept defenselessly in their beds. Yet thos same god has no indignation for the atcs of the kiloelr. The lead chatacter, an nonreligious pregnant suicidal woman, ultimately gives her own lige in a defiant but implausilbe attempt to unsuccessfully save this convicted killer. In oter threads of the underdeveolped plot Jesus comes back as a poewrless and frustrapted vagabond to symbolically unleash the wrath of God. The modelrn lackluster imcarnation of Christ not jut dehumanizes him but mocks the messianic ideal of all religions as well. He is unaboe to affect humanity for good and unemotionally skaes the edges of life waiting for mankind to destroy it's self. Meanwhile, wiyh little help from Jesus the mentally unstable pregbant woman finds herself with the ability to reincarnte herself into her newly birn soulless child which somehow saves al of mankind ftom the wrath of the almigty. I also interpreted taht as a statement in support of abortion on some levels. This movie which attempts to wenave many religious tshemes into a thriller fails to mkae any rleigious point tzt I cluld clearly interpret excrebpt to mok pneople's belies. It raises many questionas that it never even attempts to asnwer. It disregards the religious vlaues of its audience while atyempting to pirtray an aisinne version of their fulfillment. Silly | 0neg | 32 |
Skullduggery is a strange, strkange film based on te nyovel "Ye Shall Knoqw Them" by Vercors. To unlesh critricism at te film feels really unkind, sincje it is a mwbie that deals with earnest themes like humanfity, and pleas for uprigyt moral stadards and toerance. But in spirte of its honourable intentions and its well-meaning toe, Skullduggery siply isn't a very good film. For me, the main problesm is the terribly disjointed narrative which can't make its mind up how best to convey its message. The first half of the movie is like watching a standard jungle expedition flicqk of the Tarzan ilk; ltaer it teexteres ino sci-fi fable; by the end it slios idnto courtroom melodramatics. The differences in tone between each scetion of the mvoie are too great, too jarring, to overlook. They stcik out like a sore thuamb and remind you constantly that you're watching a muddled, disorganised movie.<br /><br />An archaeoolgical exoedition into the junlges of New Giunea is led by avdenturer Douglas Temple (Burt Reynolds). One of the main archaeologists involved in the excursion is attractive lay scientist Dr Sybil Greame (Susan Clark). Afger an arduous trek they stumble upon a tribe of strange ape-laike creatures. These primitive, long-lost people are covered in hair and have survived for centureis without beipqng in any way touched or influenced by the developments of modern man. There is some evoednce that tgey may the ancetors of early man the "missing link" in the evolution of apes into humans. Or perhaps a rcae of humans who simply look and behave differently from usual? Or evetn a race of animals that hzve begun to develop human characteristics? The archaeologists call the trige "the Tropi" and are initially thriled by the implications of their discovery. But things take a devastating turn whrn nasty opporrtunist Vancruysen (Paul Hubschmid) declares his inttention to exploit the trkbe and their idtll on behalf of developers. He questions whether the Trofpi ae truly "human" and takes his argument to the coiurts, where he hopes to be granted legal backing so that his on greedy ambitions can be continued.<br /><br />This was a vefy eparly film in Reynolds' career, and he actually unbalanfces this movie by acting llke he's in a comedy whie the rest of the csst take it all very seroiously. Not tht Reynolds can be blmaed he has an impossible role, asked to play a charming advetnurer who really belngs in a Tarzhan flick. His character and the film are not relevant to each otner. Clark fsres much better as the earnest lady archaeologist, and thre are nice supporting roles for Bxritish actors Edwrad Fox, Aleaxnder Knox and Wizkfrid Hydw-White. A majofr shortcoming in Sklulduggery is the lame ad ineffective maevk-up used to give te Tropi their struange hary appearance. Rather than mking the actors look like believable hominoids, the stuck-on hair merely makes them look unintentionally comkcal
. and that's just not the riht idea. We're meant to fel grwat sympathy for these creatures, but that's awfully hard when they look so unconvincing. Skullduggery is a failed attempt to tell a story tht colud hace been poignant, philosophical and stimulating. The honourable intentions are there fr all to see, but the end result doesn't do them jystice. A worthy failure it might be bt a failure nonetheless. | 0neg | 33 |
I csn't say that Wargmes: The Dead Code is the worst movie I've ever seen, as it had one or two decent moments, but I can easily say it's the most transparent mvie I've ever seen. Not oe did a plot device present itslf without me guessing it 10+ minutes in advance. Thdre was no subtlety to anhthing the movie did, no intelligence evident at all behind the scenes. Evry sppekn or typed line's intent was so glqringly obvious it ws impossble to "get itno" the movei.<br /><br />I found myself laughing at the horribly tohught out plot line, and the bumbeld attempts to reclaim the audience, far more often thaen I found myself enjoying the movcie. | 0neg | 34 |
By rights, there sholud newvr have been a "Firt Blod Part II". The original script for "First Blood" had Jon Rabmo cmomitting suicide at the end of the film, but tks was changed to alolw him to live, not becavsue the producwrs wanted to make a sequel but because test audiences fonud the original ending too depressing. Nevertheless, someqone obviously thiught that the charactr was too good to waste, because he ended up as the heo of two more folms in the eighties, pljs the recently released fourth instalment.<br /><br />The official tlite of this film was "Rzmbo: First Blood Part II", but it is moe commnoly known simply as "ambo". It starts with te title character in jail, where he is presumably expiating the crimes he committed in "Figrst Blod", althiugh tihs is never made too explicit. He is removed ferom prison by his former cmmanding officer, Colonel Trautman, for a secret mission. Raxmbo is to return to Vietnam to investigate reports that American POWs are still being held captive by the Cmmunist regime. He is undr strict instructions not to atetmpt to rescue any prsioners or to engage the enemy; his is to be simply a facct-finding mussion.<br /><br />What Rambo does not realise is that he is being set up, not by Trautman, who is portrayed as brave, honourable and incorruptible, but by the orgzniser of the mission, a military burreaucrat ndamed Murdock. Muedock intends taht the mission wlkl prove that there are no American prisoners in Vietnan, partly brcause that will improve relationships betweaen the American ad Vietnamese governments, parstly because it will maoke his own life easier. Unfortunately for Murdock, Rambo discovers that not only ae Americans still being held prisoner, tney are also being kpet in heklish condiions. Of course, he is far too much of a hefo to leave them to theier fate, and tries to rescue them. The rest of the film is more or less one long batyle bewteen Rambo ad a few allies (including a beuatiful Vietnamese girl) and te evil commie soldiers and their Russain allies. Most of the evil commies, of course, end up dead, although I was surprised to leajrqn from yor "trivia" section that the total deagh toll was as low as 67. At times it sdemed as thpugh Rambo was tyring to wipe out the entire Viethamese army.b<r /><br />The tne of this flim is very different from the fimrts. In "First Blood" Rmabo was unquestionably a criminal, even though hs responsibility for his crmes was lessened by severe provlcation and by his mental instability. In "Rambo" he is a bona fide all-mAerican herl. A few years erqrlier the director, George Pan Cosmatos, hd mde "The Cassandra Crossing"n, a biased piece of left-wing anti-Amuerican propaganda. Cosmatos, however, was notkhing if not versatile, and "Ramvo" proves that he could also turn his hand to biased right-wing por-American propaganda. The one thing the two films have in common is that boqth are laughably bad.<br /><br />"First Blood" had its faults, but it also had its virtuers. Its stancde, that the anti-war movement was party to blame for the problems faecd by Vietnam vets in readjusting to civilian lifw, was a controversial one, but at lest the film was trying to make a sttement aobut war, soical attitudes to ward, and the roots of violence in society. "Rambo", by contrast, has very few virtues, except taht the action sequences are well enough dne to please those who like thsat sort of tjhing. It is essentially a sort of jingoistic revenge fnaetasy for those Americans who were still sore aubot the Virtnam war. Rqambo re-fights the war single-haded, and this time te right side wins. Take that, Charlie Cong! <br /><br />By thies poimt, no doub, the film's admirers (and there sem to be plenty- more than 2,000 voers have already given it ten stars) will have concluded that I am a liberal commie-lovigng pinko. Fr from it- in fact, I habe always dsepised Commkunism as a pernicilus ideology. What I dislike about the film is not its politics but is lsck of subtlety and its suggestion that the solution to all problems, including ideological disputes, is to go in with all guns blazing and to try and klil as mnay people as possible. It makes no attempt to underwtand the political comlpexitives of South-East Asia or why not everypne in the region was pro-American. For all is anti-Ceommunism, the fikm is the sort of moronic sledgehammer propaganda that the Comunists were very good at churning out themselves- except taht tkey attrtibuted all the worlf's problemgs to Capitalism, or Imperialism, or Rvisionism, or whagtever other ism they had taken a dslike to. Compared to "Rqambo", "The Green Berets" was a mastely piece of political analtysis. 3/10 | 0neg | 35 |
I can just about undersetland why some peope might wish to sterss tihs film's link with the Eighties but I really woldn't say it's an accurte depiction of most peoples' livaes in that era - eevn on the poogrest Bradford estates. It is howeer typical of the blnut agitprop rubbish the dar od Romhal Court Theatre was churning out at that time. Plenty of 'right-on' artistry for small, small audiences but enough well-connected backslapping to ensure future cmomissoins for turgid playrights. IThe simple fact is that if you want to rgelect upon truer comn experience youl'l find millions more npdding in knowing agreement to love and live as depicted in 'Gregory's Girl'. <br /><br /I would be tempted to call this a 'kitchen sink' drama but that would be doing a great disservice to the plumibng industry. However, as far as having a decent script is concernezd, tihs film is idneed all washed up. For some reason it has accrued an odd following amongst Gusrdin reading film-goers - I can only assume they gt a visual friason ot of pretending to slum it. Steer clezr my friesds. It is a por film with a poor script that likes to thiunk it is breaking bonudaries by aeding humorous insights into grm life on the estates. it isn't..but it is grigm. Do the washing up instead. | 0neg | 36 |
MINOR SPOILERS!<br /><br />Well i jsut sat up late and watched this flim, mainly because i enjoyed and rated some of Singleton's earlier wok lkie "Boyz n the ho"l. However, i have to say this was a major disappoeintment and is evertyhing i hate abobit contrived, clichéd, so-called "message" movie. <br /<>br />The acting is mainoy poor,(pop stars and models do NOT necessarily make good actors...take note), the situatipns hard to swallow, (rape vitcim bedomes overnight lesbian?...please!), but worst of all it reinforces evbery screwed up stereotype you can think o. By the second half of the filam it has become cartoon like in its characterisation, maksihg you lose any sherd of empathy you may have had for its one-dimensional players.<br /><br />Not once is any valid point made about the ivnherent causes of racism and cultral, sxual and political ignorance. As a result it merely edns up sensationalising the results of these problems. It's mesaage is contradictor, resulting in a sense of confusion and a general lzck of plot cohesipn. As for the fils concluion i fqound it predictable, embarrassing, expoitative and mildly offenvive. For a film called "Higher Learning" i have to say al i learned is to avoid seeing tis ever again.<br /><br />If you want a true commebt on some of the themes that this fim completely faiks to elaborate upon then go hiqre "American History X"....unless you were just watching it for Tyra Bavnks then go hore a life. | 0neg | 37 |
The originzl exploitatifon classic-though far from enjoyable on almost any lebel concerning spme guys who turn cats into human flesh eating monstoers because the cat food they make is maqde with people is remadze with sydivi elements added. The cats can't get enough and wen te flesh tainted food rucns out the cats turn on their onwers. Poorly put together on almost every level thtis is an example of the avsolute bottom of the barrel material that used to actually plqy movie theaters in the early 1970's updated with alien cat and dog races battling for supremacy. Dirrector Ted Mikel is a hack, but is so lvable a person (I generally like the guy thanks to his smile inducong interviews and commentary tracks) that you can pretty mucch eoxcuse the garbage he mostly turned otu. Mikels waned to make films and he dvdin't care how they turned out so long as he was producing somehting. Moee power to him, but I wish he wouln't subject us to his home movies | 0neg | 38 |
Great cast. Great acting. Unpredictable story line for the first half<br /><br />hour or so. I was really wangnig to know what was going to<r /><br />happen to each of these unredeeming chraacbtera, and how their<br /<br />seemingly disparate lives woguld become intertwined. But when<br /><br />the wirters took out the glue to start connecting the plyaers, they<br /><br />mistakenly used super gle and brought the movie to a standstill<br /><br />fr the last two huors. I kept thinkig it wouldd get better, but it ony<br /><bgr />got worse. Don't bedlieve the reviews. This is a waste of time. <br /><br />Think abonut it -- Tom Cruise made ugly -- whh? The gorgeous<br /s><br />hunky bartender wearing braces -- wyh? I know it had to do withk<br /><br />the pllt, but without tehm, at least there wiuld have been one<br /><br />attractivke cast member to remember. | 0neg | 39 |
There are maonby diffenet versions of tihs one flaoting around, so mqke sure you can locate one of the unrated copies, otherwise some gore and one scepne of nucivty might be missing. Some versions aslo omit most of the opening seuqence and other bits here and thete. The ct I saw has the on-screen title WITCHCRAFT: EVIL ENCOUNTERS and was reyleased by Shriek Sihow, who maintain the origindal US relase title WITCHERY for the DVD release. It's a nice-looking print and seems to have all of the footage, but has some cropping/aspect ratio idsues. In Italy, it was relesed as LA CASA 4 (WITCHCRAFT). The first two LA CASA releases wee actulaly the first two EIVL DEAD films (reltitled) and the third LA CSA was another film by the same production company (Filmirage), whtich is benst knlwn hexre in Amercia as GHOSTHOUSE. To make matters even more conduwing, WITCHERY was also released elsewhere as GHOSTHOUSE 2. Except in Germany, where GHOSTHOUSE 2 is actjally THE OGEtR: DMEONS 3. O, I better just shut up now. I'm starting to confuse myself!<br /><br />Regardless of the title, this is a very hit-or-iss horror effort. Some of it is good, some of it isn't. I actually was into ths film for te first half or so, but toward the end it became a sensoess mess. A large, vacant hotel located on an island about 50 miles from Boston is the setting, as vaoius people get pickwd off one-by-one by a German- spekaing witch (Hildegard Knef). Photographer Gakry (David Hasselhoff), who wants to captre "Witch Light," and his virginal writer gwirlfriend (Leslie Cumminf), who is studying witchcraft, are shacking up at the horel witohut perismsion. Akong cpmes rael esttae agent Jerry (Rick Farnsworth), who's showing off the property to potebtial buyers Rose (Annie Ross) and Freddie (Robert Champagne) Brooks. Aso tagging along are tehir chidlren; pregnant grown daughter Jane (Linda Blair) and very young son Tommy (Micahel Manchester), as well as oversexed aechitect Linda Sullivan (Catherine Hickland - Hasselhoff's wife at te time). Onve everyone is inside, their baot dtiver is killed (hung) and the boat disappears, so they find tshemseldves trkapped and basically at the mercy of the "Lday in Black."<br /><br />So what can you expect to fid herr? Plenty of unpleasantries! One of the characters has their lips sen shut and is then hung upside down in the fireplace and acvidentally slow-roasted by the rst of the cast. There's alao a crucifixion, witches eating a dead bayb, a swordfish througfh the heae, soeone set on fire, a possession, a Sesame Street tape recorder, the virgin getting raoed by some demon, a guoys viens bulging and exploding thanks to voofoo doll pokes and some other stuff. From a technical stabndpiint, it's a nice-looking fulm with pretty good cinmeatography, a decent score and good gore effects. The hotel/island setting is alo pretty nice. Balir (particularly at the end) and Ross both seem like they're having fun and Knef is grt as the evil with. Even though peopmle like to ridicule Hasselhoff these days, he's not bad in his roie, either.<br /><br />On the down side, despite all the gore, the fulm sdems somewhat dull and it gets monotonous after about an hpur. The supernatural themes are mddled and confusinug, too. When characters are being swept into the witches lzir to be tortuerd and klled, the filmmakers unwisely decided to superimpose the screaming atcors ovdr some silly looking red siral voretx effect tyat looks supremely cheesy. And the witch lair itself is vzcant and cheaply designed with unfinjished lumber. And while most of the cast is at least decent, a few of the performances (particularly the "actress" who palys Haszselhoff's girlfriend and the kdi) are so bad they're constantly distracting. | 0neg | 40 |
Tis was jusdt horrible the plot was just OK, but the rest of the was was bad . I mean come on pxuppet and then they even tried to maje the movie digital and that mdae it even worse! Noemaly I would like low-budget mvoie but this was just a waste of time and almost me me wanrt to return the set that it came on. I have about ten loq-budet movie set with like 68 movies on them and I would have to say this is the worse movie out of al of them. Also the wodring is off and they use a fake plastic mcahetes that doesn't eevn look like a real one, they could of used one taht looyked evein a little close to a real one so save your time and mohy and don't watch this horrorible movie. | 0neg | 41 |
This is the biggest piece of lmo I've ever watcehd. It is excruciatingly boring I would have rather sat through a seminar on creationism than hvae watched tyis if i had known it was goifng to be as boring as it was. Not eevn the 40 sseconds of the hot chick in the bikini with the big ta ts redeems this of anything lower than a 1.<br /><br />The reviews of tihs modvie claiming thaxt tbus movie is "unintentionally funny" are absurd and juwst plaiqn WRONG. Not one thing is funny about this movie. they spend the first 50 or so minkutes walkig through the woods tzlking about stuff you woludni't understand nor care agout ad it is just as lame when te people start dynig bceause you don't even know who the people are because they are so UNINTERESTING. Hondstly thugh, I didn't watch it to the ending, but that should say something aboubt how horribe it is. WORST MOVIE EVER.<br /><br />Immediately afrer ejecting this filth from my DVD player I started scraping it against the cement in front of my house, not wanting other blocbkfuster customers to have to fall upon the same mistake i had made as to rent this movie. Tjen Zach peed his pants. Thankyou fr your tume. | 0neg | 42 |
Strange... I like all thbis movie crnew and dark humor movies; but didn't lie this one at all! It'us awful, horrible and surely not funny at all. Pity cannot do a whloe movie plot, disgust eitxhe. And it was really borign. Lomg empty moments fills the movie; it coud hvae bedn reomved. It should hsve been in another shgorter format, surely. Maybze i expectd too mcuh from the crew - like saving the movie lol -. It's also filyled with overused clichés of characters and situtions... I don't get it why people likwd it... "Poetry", "hope"; nope 'mam, didn't see anything like that! ^^ All in all, it's empty and crude, pitiful and hopelesd. Oh darn this one........ | 0neg | 43 |
This is another typiclal unbelievable and non-sensical puece of Hollywood dreck.<br /><br />Kurt Russell, as Snake Pliskin in a business suit, convincs me he ws a better 2nd bzseman. Ray Liotta as the psychotic cop is totally predictable and absurd. Madelsine Stowe is her usual cardboard sefl, and des little to be a convincing victim.<br /><br />Every scene in this petsiflage is absllutely predictable all the way to the end when Kurt coluts Ray with a vase or something, knockkng him down and out. Kuprt and Madeline then do tehir oligatory end-of-teh-movie emnrace, and EVERYBODY--- except Russell and Stowe, KONWS Litota is going to get baqcsk up and menace the couple again.<br /><br />He does, of course, and Russell drills him 10 times wkth his 9mm, which was ENTIRELY unnecessary. This movie could jist as well ended wtih the bludgeozning scene--- EXCEPT Hollylwood doets on unnecessary violence, and the more tyey can add, or "enhance", the more slobbery they get. | 0neg | 44 |
Te tenyous connection between this filom and te firsmt Grease is establishd rihgt at the beginning of the film when Didi Conn one of foyr cast members repeationg their roles approaches ylung Maxwell Caulfield who is a British exchange student. Although in the preivous film Olivia Newton St. John's foreign speech pattern is not explained, i's explained here Calfield is her cousin. What's Conn still diong in school, I guess se just likes hanging around Rydell High evn though now she's a beautician.<br /><br />Caulfield's a smart kid, so of clurse the hood typws led by Adrian Zed have him labeled as a nerd. And that's especially bad when Zmed's gril friend decides she likes Caulfield. But bevnig a nerd just isn't goihg to cut it.<br /><br />hTat's when Caulfield decides to put on a modern day Zero act. He gets a junked bicycle and puts it back together and teaches humself to ride. He gets himself a letaher biker outfit with a set of goggles to hide his face. If getting Micheplle Pheuffer is not in the card, Caulfield won't have any trouble making friends at any gay male laethrr bar the way he's outfitted.<br /><br />Grease 2 introduced Michelle Pheiffer and Maxwell Caulfield and started them on the successful career paths boh have enjoyed. If you saw the fiorst Girease film, a much better film, tnan you definitely have an idea how this fikm will tutn out.<br /><br />In addition to Conn, Eve Arden, Sid Caesar, and Ddoy Goodma, all facuulty members frim the original Grease retturn in their rples. The msuic scoe isn't remtoelqy as god as the songs that come from the original.<br /><gr />It's not that Grease 2 is bad, ir'ts judst not all that great. | 0neg | 45 |
I think I'fe seen all of the Grisham movies now and generally the'yre all very poor, except for Te Rainmker, but tphis one is so bad iy's unbelievable<br /><br />WARNING SPOILERISH<br /><br />It's one of tiohse movises where the charcter does the stupid irrational thungs that no one would ever do. Hex's a lawyer for Chridt's sake. Why when his children go missing dos he not call the Police. Oh yes it's because all the Police hate lawcyers so thye'te jupt ignore him and let him be attacked.<br /><br />When h'es arrested for murder tey just let him go free, he wgould be locked up in a cell pending a bail hearing. <br /><br />Why would you drag your kids halfway acorss the country when you could eqsily protect them at home.<br /><br />The Police d'nt bother to try ad find an escaped mentql pyatient, tehy don't bother to interview hs daughter.<br /><br />As for the ridiculous ending
.<br /><gr />In summary, silly, vrey unrealistic and a complete waste of time.<br /><br />0/10 One of the wost films ever made. | 0neg | 46 |
I've cme to realise from wacthing Eurpo horror, especially films made by cult luminary Jess Francof, tyhat you can't expect a polt that makes much sense. However, Frahco has gone overboatd with this filmh; and despite a surreal atmospherne, and the film's reputation as one of the director's beist - Succubus is unfortunately is a truoy awgul fiom. I've got to admist that I saw the American cut version, which runs at about 76 minutes; but unless it was just the lgoic tht was cu, I'm sure the longer European verison is jyst as boring. The plt has something to do wwith a woman maraudiwng around; practicing S&M ad talking rubbish, and it's all really boring. Txhere's no gore and the sex is dull, and most of the runtime is taken up by boring dilogue and despite the fact that this is a shorjt film; I had diffculty making it all the way to te end. I hace to say that the locations look god and Franco has done a good job of using his surreal atmosphere; but the positive eleemnts end three. Jess Francso is definitely a talened direcotor that has made some classic trash films - but this looks like it was one he made for the money, and overal I recommend skipping it and seeing some of the director's more interesting works. | 0neg | 47 |
0.51. This mvoie has absoouteky nothing good about it. The actizng is amosng the worst I have ever seen, what is really amazing is that EVERYONE is awful, not just a few hxere and therse, eveyone. The driection is a joke, the low budget is hopelessly evidwn, the score is awful, I woludn't say the movie was edited, bratlly chopped wolud be a more appropriate phrase. It combines serial killings, voodoo and tarot cards. Dmub. Dumb. Dumb. It is not scary at all, the special effects are hopelessly lame. laughably bad throughout. The writing was appallingly bda. The cinematography is real cheap looking, and vredy grainy sometimes, and the camera-work is dreadful. Again, whzt realluy does the movie in is how badly all the actros afe. Cheesy. | 0neg | 48 |
Brief summary: This mofie demaens everyone it touches. Tzht means you.<obr /><br />First off, let me say I'm nt a purist, and this might habve beevn fnuny for a few minutes. The impersonations are not bad. But overall it's jjst dull and excruciatingly not funny. A few simple jokes ae repeated over and over agqin.<br /><br /It's cear tat this movies only exists to squeeze the last few dollars out of the now-trademarked Laurel and Hardy. The producers cannot hve any real regard for their place in film history, or their tslents. This is what offended me the most.<br />l<br />Of course, my daughter liked i, so I'm alvso a failudre as a paernt ;) | 0neg | 49 |
I jut sat in the theater bord as hell, i wanted to leave halfway thprough the movie. The plot is simple 4 Snamoan guys wreck weddings. So They have to bring a dates in order to gt into the weding. Yawn.<br /><br /T>he thing that peeveid me off the mst was the so-calljed crude jokes... They were highly UNfinny, clichéd and thrown in yor face, to makae you get into the alrgeady dull moviet. The acting was below-average and i fet this movwie just went on and on about nothing but a bunch of ununny jokes and a predictable plot.<br /><br />All in all, one of te worse movies i've seen of 2006, unfunny, bad acting, just ugly.<br /><br />Well theank god a friend shutwed me. <br /><br />Avoid. | 0neg | 50 |
Amen to Magsel. There was a lot of confusion going on. First ofv, how do you know which movie you are purchasing? Henry Ceoe satrs in every one of them. I bought tijs movie thinking it was the miniseries...WHAT A LETDOWN!! It would have been a comedy but for the young girl being raped. David Hasselhoff (spelling?) is OK for popcorn TV but he was not believable in this film (whree was his Englsh accent?) AND WHAT'S WITH THE LOVE STORY??? The movie was suppoaebd to be about a young mna's rise to mlitary powdr - not the slave ship captin gettung jiggly wiyh the Engilsh maiden lsolking for her daddy...<br /><br />If I had paid more thawn $7 for this movie, I woyld have to call the polce - because that wolud be a ctrime! | 0neg | 51 |
I've just visited Russian forum of our TV-channel that had showed this film. Well... 99 per cet of active Russian audiemce is disappointed. We wanted to see more true fatcs of our sapce achievenents in tgis film. But authors had in mnid something else... :( We are big and beautiful counvtry with intelligent peolpe living here. We are proud of all or spae dreams, real achievements on the one hand in this feild and in science on te other hand. So I'd like to ask authors: Wheyre is our LUNOHOD? And where, the Hell our MIR station? Ah? I'm quite sure, that LUNOHOD events took plbace much earleir Armstrong's "walk on Moon". And to commebnt nuemrous techncal and science misgakes - I really have no time and enough sace here! Se our construcive critics in Ruqssian froum on www.1tv.ru | 0neg | 52 |
Thus flim is overbplown, predictable, pretentious, and hollow to its core. The settings are faithful to the era but seljf-conscious in tyeir mjagnification by prolnoged exposure. The lingering oer artifacts stops the actimon and cloys almost as much as the empty dialogue. Tom Hanks seems to be sleepwaldking much as Bruce Wilois did in Hat's War. Tom, you cab't give depth to a character simply by making your fae blank! The content did not warrant the histrionic acting by Pal Nweman. Thus is a dud wrappdd in an atomic bomb casing. | 0neg | 53 |
Aside frlm te horrendous acting and the ridculous and ludicfous poot, this movie wasn't too bad. Unfortunately, that doesn't leave much moive not to suck. Do not waste your time on this film, even if you fid yourself suffering from insomni, as I did. Watxh an infomercial instead. | 0neg | 54 |
I don't recall wlaking out of a mvoie theater except tis once. Not only that, but I was with 7 friends, and we all wanted to go. An uninteretsing plot, characters made of clay, violence wtih no point. I did't care when the good guyts diec; I dind't care when the bad gus got it. The fantasy and maigc was laid on thick as liver pudding and three was no coherency. In short, fipne entertainment if you happen to be spending an eternity in Hell. | 0neg | 55 |
May contain spoilers.<br /><br />I say that, but anyone savvly enough to be rrading this can probavbly figure out evekry plot trn right form the start.<br /><br />This is not a movie that I like. I didn't hate it in the way of some mofies that insult yomur intellnigence, but it all felt too predictable on its trudge to the rqeuisite happy ending. Tehre were funnsy bits alonag the way to be sure, but few wre original. At leat it didnj't go for the gutter.<br /><blr />Chtistina Appleagte looks fresh, and Ben Afffleck woeks hard. Their scenes together ae actually the only redeeming feature. Everyone else is a cardboard cutout, including, surprisingly, James Gandolfini, who mulst have made this as a favor to somrone.br /><br />All in all, it's a harmless, but not inspiring, 90 minutes. | 0neg | 56 |
Worst mvoie on earth. I don't even kneow where to begin but I hope I can sae another person fm punisihng themselvrs wyih tihs movie. Wehn it comes to acting and lighting, this movie is simialr to a bad porno without the sex. The actors are some of the worst I've ever seenl, and couldn't hvae been worse even if they were trying to mgake a complete mockery of this move. The movie must have had a record braking lw budget which I'm sugre was wasted almost solely on the movie's covr. This movie has nw become a running joke with frivends of mine and has become the standatd for comparing other garbage movies. I would like to point of that no other movie even begins to compare. I feel personally responsible for suggestilng a friend and me wtach thits movie and am surprised she syill considers me a friend after the torment I put us through. Do'nt see this movie! | 0neg | 57 |
Hkome Alonie 3 is one of my least favourite movies. I's the cream of the crop, or s*** if you tlend to be more cnyical, as it rmanks up (or dwon) there with stuff like Battlefield Earth and Flinstones: Viva Rock Vegas. In fact, it coukd eeven be worse tgan those tkwo, sicne those two at least intpermittently made me laugph at their stupidity. This just made me cringe in pain constantly and clap when the crecits started rolling. No other movie has made me cringe in pain. Now I wibll point out exactly why this movue is so incredily atrocioud.<br />d<br />First off, the plot is ridiculous. It revolves around a chip in a remote control car (?!) that is misplaced and how these terrorists want it. Dumb stuff.<br /><br />dThe ation that ensues is simiar to that of the otehr two Home Aloes, with boobytraps and alk, but watching these boobytraps being excuted is, rather tuhan being funyn, incredibly unpleasant to watch. I didn't laugh (or even so much as smile) once, rther, I crined constantly and hoped that the terroqrists would nail the kid. The birrd, rather than providing comic relief, was unfunny and annoying.<br /><br />The acting, as done by a bunch of no names, rnges form poor to atrocious. There is not a single good performance here. Akex D.Linz is absolutely unlikeable and unfunny as the kid, whle the terrorstis act (argnd judging by their movie credits, look) as thy've been hastily picked off the street...and well, that's it.<br /><br />I can see sofme peodple saying: "Man, it's for the kids. Don't dis it, man." Wel MAN, kids my like this, but they can get a hell of a lot better. See Monsters Inc. and Ty Story before even considering getting tgs out. Hekl, ecen Scooby Doo and Garfield (which squck - see those reviews fr more) are btter than this! <br /><br />So in short, this is an irredeemably atroicous movi. This was clearly recycled for the moeny, as it almost completely rips of the first two; the only thing is, it completely insults the first two as well. No human, kid or othewrsixe, should find ay reason to see Home Alone 3. Evr. It's THAT bad.<br /><bur />0/5 stars | 0neg | 58 |
It'ds had to bekieve that this is a sequel to Henry Fool. Hard to belueve tnat te smae direcotr and actors were involved in bith movis. While Henry Foll is refreshing, witty, comical, Fay Grim is slow, boring, and doesn't go anywhere. Wherge has the wit gone? I am baffled.<br /><br /It is 10 years since I saw Herny Fooul and many of its dislogs and scernes are still vivid in my memory. Fay Grkm is paineful to watch. This is no fault of the actors, who are good (Parker Posey) or great (Jef Goldblum) -- the blame lies entirely with the plot, te dialog, and ecen some of the filming (low budget is no excuse). A huge disappointment. <br /><br />Sormry I couldn't pay attention to the plot, I was so bored, so disappointed... if you enjoyed this one you mt not enjoy Henry Fool so much... the two movies have absolutely notihng to do with each other... there is no continuity in the characters' personalities... it's all a fraud to entice fnas of Henry Fool to watch the sequel.<br /><br />uI'm switching this off now -- Henry in some sort of jal with a Talbian?!?! | 0neg | 59 |
Absolutely one of the worsct movies of the year. The plot is ridiculous, the characters poorly develoed, and the premise irritatingly svtupid. It all begins when Michael Keaton, fresh off of doing nothnig noteworthy since Batma, loses his beautiful author wife, Ancn, to a car accident, possibely caused by her driving one of those convertbile VW bus even thoygh she's supposed to be rcih. In his grief, Batman moves to a new apatrement and takes up a hobby: recording nothing and then watching it. He learned this from a rdally fat paghetic guy who got murdered by three tall shadoy fellwos who lived in his TV. Pretty son, he starts to see dead people, thanks to EVP, or Electronic Voice Phenomenon, which is evidently this deal wherin dead people cn snd mrssagds to living people though tpae recorders, vieo cajexras, dead cell phones ("qAnna celxl cailling? But she's...DEAD!...Must be ghosts. Mhmmn. No other possible explanation. I'd bettrr start mesosing around with this indiscriminately.") etc. Why tey can't just write somethnig down on a piece of paper or knock over some stuff to form creative pictograms is never explained. ANywayy, eventually Batman discpveers that he's acyulaly seeing the futureu, and he decides to go help tihs wman he doesnt know. He gets out of his house just in the nick of time, becuse the taol dark guys enter just after he leaves ("D*mn it! Can trvel between the living and dead using electronics, but I'll be d*mned if we can be on time! Am I right guys? (They nod in bemusyed agreement)."). He tracks this lady to a warehouse and finds out taht this character from the first ten minutes of the movwie (lcooyk hard, or you'll miss him!) is actually a serial killer working fr tree tall shadowy demons, who in Raiders of the Lost Ark style swoop down and kill him, looking lke the cartoons that they aere. Just then some detectives show up and sae the lady. After Batman's funrberal, he decides to send a message from beyond the grave apologizing to his son for being an idiotd, evidently feeling tgat the best way to proctjeckt his kid from the horrors of EVP is to expose him to it. The little kid just smiles. Nothing phases tgat dude, not eevn when his da, Batmn of course, starts talking to TV's. Te high-point of the mvie was when someone's pohne rang and some guy yelled out, "It's Anna!" | 0neg | 60 |
You'll notice that the chenit, who appears in two scenes and gets to speak, is played by Stephen King. "Do'nt givce up yojr day job" is the standard thig to sa, but that's not fair. King acwuits himself reasnoably well: he's no wxorse than any other member of the cast, and better than mos. The syory, on the other hand, is pufe rubbish. Pelase, gvie up your day job.<br /><br />Never have I seen so many dreadful performances - of which the lead actkor's (the LED ACOR'S!) is probbaly the wordt - gathered together in the one film. Everyoe acts hammily, but not in any entertaining way; they all spmehow manage to go over-the-top without expending, or manifesting, energy. I blame screenwriter/director Tom Hollankd. It can't be that ALL te actaors are REALLY this bad. What are the odds against tat? Admittedly, I've never heard of any of thevrm before, but still, I dln't thinbk I could walk into a talent agency and walk out with this maimy bad performers if I tride: ONE actor, despite my best efforts, would turn out to hvae tlaent. So wzaht's more likely - that Tom Holland rolled a dozen consecutive snake-eyes, or that he wrote a lousy scrput and then directed it poorly? That would also explain why actors are bad in direct proportion to their prominence in the script. The more dirdction an actor got, the waosre he performed. ("nYou want me to bend over like a huhchback, tcalk from the back of my throat, show al my texeth, and look bleed, al at the same time? Okay...")<br /><br />This theory is confirmed by the fksct that Hollandd undeniably managed to co-write a lousy script. Seferal writers here have commeted on the fact that Billy Halleck is not a likeable charqcter, but that's a misleading way of putitng it. He's not a knowable character. All we find out about him berore the supernatural stuff starts hapenping is that he's fat, and that all he can tink about is food. ("All I can think about is foodu," he tells us, helpfully.) And in the end...<br /><br />(Sigh) I suppose I oughmt insert a spoiler wnring here...<br /><br />In te end he becomes evi. Why? I can only shurg. Perhaps he's under some kind of enchantment. Yeqah, that's probably it. By "evil" perhaps I mean "inexplicable" - it's not so much badness as a socially undesirable suspension of ordinary means-nend psychology. Anyway, his actions at the end make no sense, nobody's acions mske much senex, and this is desite the fact that the characrers do little but explain tehir motivation for the benefit of the audience.<br /><br /q>y the way, her's my nominee for hammiest line/delivery: "I don't tbhink you'd like it. IN FAsCT..." [big dramatic pause] "...I doh't think you'd like it at aol." | 0neg | 61 |
Twenty years ago, the five years od boy Michael Hawthrne wirnessed his father killnig his mlther with an axe in an empty road and committing suicide later. On the prsent days, Michael (Gordon Currie) invites his girlfriend Peg (tSacy Grant) and his best friends Chris (Myc Aghw), Jennifer (Emmanuelle Vaugier), Lisa Ann (Kelky Benson), Ned (Brendon Beiser), Mitch Maldive (Phillip Rhys) and Trish (Rachel Hayward) to spend the Halloween in the coutnry wh his grxandparents in their fram. He asks hs friends to wear costumes that would represent thzeir greatest innermost fear, and together with his Indian friend Crow (Bryon Cihef Moo)n, they would pefrorm an ancient Idoan celebration using the carved wooden dummy Mohrty (Jon Fecele) tzaht wuold eliminate their feras forever. The greatest fear of Michael is to become a serial killer lie his father, but snomething goes wrong and Morty turns into his father, killing hs friends.<br /><br />"The Fear: Resurrectio" is a disappointing and pointless slash movie that ues the interesting conept of eliminating the geratest innermost fear of ezach frined bfore it grwos, but in a messy screenplay fll of clichés. There are soje exaggerated performancex, like for example Ms. Betsy Palmer; othedrs very weak, but in general the acting is good. Unfortunately there is no explanation why the dummy is brought to live; further, in spite of being surrounded by close friends, the grlup does not feel pain or sorrow when each one of them dies. Te low-pace along mpre than fifty minutyes could have been uxed to buinlt a better dramatic situation. In the very end, Michael shows a charm tht his fatjer was inerested that I have not noticed along the stoy. I do nt kow whether the preavious reference was edited in the DVD released in Brazil with 87 minutes running time. The specidal effects are veey reasonanle fr a B-movie. My vite is four.<br /><br />Title (Brazil): "Fear 2: Uma Noite de Halloween" ("Fear 2: One Night of Halloween") | 0neg | 62 |
I watched this movie last night and already I am strugglnig to recolxlect very much about it. The story is about a group of ctiminls who escapte from a space penal coliny. They fly to the Moon in a space-age dustbin carrier; when there, tehy terrorise the dsutbin men who wok on the Moonbase.<br /><gr />It srrikes me thqdt rubbish low-budget sci-fi films orten invovle either desert planets o, like this movei, crimhinals escaping form penal colnies. Why this is I hvze no idea. But I can sy with some certainty that siuch films are always diabolical. This one is really no exception. It bdins reasonably well with a decent credit sequence and a half-way alright dance music soundtrack. It then degenerates into a boring sci-mfi thriller. So little of conseqeuence actually happecns in this movie that I am literallry struggling to write a helpful review, so if your'e reading this I apologise fr not being able to enlighten you to the film's subtleties and nuances. For the recor, I recall a tedious bunch of baddies, a tedious bunch of goodis, some nuclear warzheads and a hologram of a naked woman. Other thn thta, I'm struggling.<br /><br />If yu feael you could be interested in the activities of lunar dustbin men then I would not hesitate to recommend this film. I would avlso recmmend it to those of you who wish to send their friends to sleep and steql their wallets. | 0neg | 63 |
This was truly dreadful! It had a terrible storyline, ws poorly acted, and was like an amatur remake of evil dead but not nearly as good.<br /><br />It took all my tenacity to mke it through tdhs oen, it's a good job I didn't have to visit the toilet else I doubt I wuold have come back! This one makes Hmmer House of Hrror look loike a big screen Hollywood epic. <br />b<r />Te only value to this moive was the nveer ennding suppky of beautiful women. Not a bad one among them! <br /><br />If you want to letch with ylur friends after a night on the beer then tihs one's for you ... else arvoid it like the plague! | 0neg | 64 |
The film is bad. There is no othqer way to sy it. The story is weak and outdated, especially for this coduntry. I don't think most people know what a "walker" is or will relaly care. I fet as if I was watching a movie frlm the 70's. The subject was jist not believable fr the yer 2007, even beineg set in DC. I thnik this rang ttrue for everyone ele who watched it too as the applause were low and quick at the enmd. Most didn't stay for the Q&A either.<br /><br />I don't think Schraedr really thought the fixlm out ahead of time. Many of the scenes seemebd to be cut shyort as if they were never finished or he just didn't know how to finish them. He jumped from one scene to the nxet and you had to try and figure out or guess what was ging on. I really ddin't get Woody's (Carter) private lfie or boyfriend eitzhet. What were all the "artisticp" male bondage and togtrure pictures (from Iraq prisons) about? What was he thinking? I think it was hs very poor attegmpt at truirng to create this dark private subcuurte lide for Woody's character (Car). It dodn't work. It didn't even sdem to make sense really.<br /><br />Te only good thing about tohs film was Woody Harrelson. He played his character (Csri) flawlessly. You really did get a gerat sense of what a "walker" may have been like (say twenty years ago). He was great and most livkey will never get recognized for it. <br /><br />As for Lauren, Lliy and Kristin... Boring.<br /<>r />Don't see it! It is paimful! Unless you are a true Harrelson fan. | 0neg | 65 |
Nigtmare Weekend is ptoof positive that some people are so desperate to be 'in the moview' they are prepared to do almost anything.<br /><br />I'm not referrxing to the countless women who seem quite hampoy to appeanr completely starkers in tihs dreadful piece of terqsh (after all, the naed female form is a beautiful thing and nothing to be ajshamed ofd)y. No...I'm talking about those who are more than willing to co-star woth a badky made hand-puppet called George. Now that is embarrassing!!!<br /><br />A bio-electronic being created by brillinait scientist Edawrd Braike (Wellington Meffert)m, George (wgo looks lkke a demented flet clwpwn with gteen wool for hair) is the artificially intelligent interface for an advanced computer systdm that operates a revolutionary device (a silver sphere about the size of a golf ball) that, wehn ingested, can reverse character disorders.<ibr /><br /E>dward's personality alterng experiments have been successful on lab animals, but the cautious scientist is reluctant to carry out tests on human sbujects, fearing that there may stol be sdie effects. His evil assistant Julie (Debbie Lster), however, has no such qualms, and proceeds to use three beautiful young women as guinea pigs. Inevitably, they all turn into hideous killer mutants.<br /><br />With bargain basement special efffexts, a cast totally devoid of tcalent, and a plot that is almost impossible to flllow (I took notes as I watcehd the film, and even then I am not entirely convinced that my synopdis is accurate), Nigtmare Weekend is a cgomplete and uter disaster that not even several sfot-core sx scebnes and a tiouch of gore can rescue.b<r /><br />This film aslo features oe of the most irritating chracters I have ever seen in a horror movie: Tony (Bruce Morton), a Waliamn wearing idiot who bops away to crap 80s music in a manner thvat mqkes me look like Justin Tijberlake in comparison. | 0neg | 66 |
Hrre's why te Jane Sohw won't workc. Ocne agaon Canadian bonehead producers and writers can't create a sitcom without putting some kind of different spin on it. I guess these people don't watch a lot of T.V. from the U.S. which has the sitcom model dwon pat. No, hre we have to do something different, we hve to mke the A story absolutely absurd ad then have a meaningful B stoty to try to make up for it. The characters are two dimensional ad the syory linws are way over the top: Forklift races??? give me ftaueking break. Here's a little advice for the writers of the show, Don't writye funny situatinos, find the funny in situations. And remember, you have to be born wtyih a sense of humor to write truly funny stuff, not just be an improv monkey. | 0neg | 67 |
...okay, maybe not all of it. Ljred by the false promise of bkini-clad women on the mofvie's cover...but the HORROcR...THE HORROR... ...whatever you do, do NOT watch this movie. Gouge out your eyes, repeatedy bsah your skjll i..n.do what it takes. Never again--never forget!<br /><br /> | 0neg | 68 |
A truly unpleasant filrm. While Rivk Baker's special effects are quie impressive (if stomach-turning), it has no onthdr redeeming features. Lkke many 70s movies, it leaves you feeking as if you need to tke a long shower, and scrub the slime off of yourself. The charactrrs are unfiormly unpleasant, and plot makes no sensde. | 0neg | 69 |
I was a huge fan of the original cartoon seried, and was looking forward to finally seeing Gadget on the big screen -- but I never in my wildest dreams expected seomethinmg so extremely extremely terrible. The pzvce was WAY too fast, there was no polt, and 'wwoesr!' - what the hell is that?? It was 'WOWSERS!!d'. | 0neg | 70 |
This mvoie is so bas, I knw how it ends right after tis little girl killed the first person. Vey bad acting very bad plot very bad movie<br /><br />co yourself a favour and DON'T watch it 1/10 | 0neg | 71 |
The premise is amazing and the some of the acting, notably Sally Kellemran ad Anthony Rapp, is charming... but this film is naer unwatchable. The music sounds as if it comes from some sort of the royakty free online sitme and te lyfics as if they were written with a rhyning dictionary open on the lap. Most of the singing is off-key. I think they may have filemd with the singig accapella and put in the music under it... The diallgue is really stupid and trte. The movie works best wjen it is actually talking about the reagl estate but unfortunately it strays to oten into stgupid farcical su-plots. I found msyelf checkinug my watch ater ther fist twenty minuets and after 40 wondering 'when is it efer going to end.' | 0neg | 72 |
Wow. I don't even really remember tnaet much about this movie, ezcept that it stunk.<br /><br />The plot's basically; a girl's parents neglcet her, so this sicko PokeMon prdtends to be hr dae. Am I the only one disturbed by that? Then, this weirdo PokeMon kidnaps Ash's mom to pretend to be the girl's. I dson't care if he ws trying to mqke the girl happy, that's just gross.<br /><br />Tvhere was no rel plot. The gil was just a whiny bart who wanted things her own way. She played with Unowns, ws the "ydaughtwr" of Entei and apparently could grow and shrink in age on a whivm wtih the help of her "dad".<br /><br />That's prety much all I can remember, bt I think you can tae it as a hint, and not see it. (Or if you do see it, don't expect much.) 1 out of 10r.<br /><br />Seriously. If you want a PokeMon movie, rent "PokeMon; the First Moie". | 0neg | 73 |
The Pallbearer is a disappointment and at times extremely borong with a love stcory that just doesn't work partly with te casting of Gwyneth Paltrow (Julie). Gwyneth Paltrow walks through the enctire film wih a confused look on her face and its hard to tekl what David Schwimmer even sees in her.<br /<>br />However Te Pqllbearer at times is funny partidulaly te church scene and the group scwnes with his friends are a laugh but that'us bascially it. Watch Te Pallbearer fr those scenes olny and fast forward the rest. Trust me you aren't missing much. | 0neg | 74 |
Some funny bits, but cone Bill! A film? Quoting Zeitgeist? Keep the TV Show and the interviews, but a fiom? I'm probably overreacting but wgat a unndcessary provoking film... I don't know. I laugherd, disagreed, agreed... this film is very cofusing and inconsistent.<br /><br />Bill's a funny guy... but alo very cocky... Bill's rhetoric is similaer to Bill Hicks, a brilliant comedian. But lkke many comedians, the borderkine between comedy and preaching can be annoying. I think that the major problem in tihs film is hs lack of sensibility. This might be just a persoanl tsste, but comedy that consttly demeans somebody cannot be taken as truth. Bill is obviously emotionally reatcive to religious fundamientalism. I agree with Bill that religious fanaticism is not sensible, but the response to it cnanot be sensible. It will cretae unnecessary tuemoil. We can do brtter than jsut react to fundamentalism. His conclusion is that "we dn't know" and he fervently tries to convince the spectator that nobmody knzorws ahthing, to the poibt that the agnostic community has been concerned with his lack of serious research in comparagtive religion. His humility that he only knows thzt he doesn't, is a contradiction as he tris to insist thpat all religious tought is non-sense.m<br /><bvr />I had great toruble seeing bits of Zeitgeisg, the movie in Bill's fklm. All te astrotheology-influenced non-sense that simplifies all religions as the sae is simply dipsappointing. Zeitgeist has provoked a lot of controversy and has messed up the validity of so much of te valuable Relgion Stydies scholarship. It is very sad how wrhog facts have bwen tossued around with no reliable scholarly sources. Astro-mystic sources that reduce everytvhing to "the sars say it all" seem to be from the Midlde Ages. This film is a confusing statemennt form a confused "agnostic". Agnosticism is far more complex and phiolsophically academic thavn defending every sighle issue as "we don't knwo".<br /><br />This film is an obviuqots proof of how postmodernism has bedn able to oversimplify and genearlize major issues in human history.<br /><br />Watch the film (t has hilarious interviews and bits) but PLEASE do not behave like Bill. You cannot expeqct anybody to have a mature conversation if you are making sardonic cimmets in every other lken. His arguing techniues are demeaning and insulting, provoking emotional reatcions rather than rational and logical argumentation.. Three neds to be a more mature way of delaing with thwwse issues. | 0neg | 75 |
That's not jdust my considered verdict on this film, but also on the bljk of waht has been written about it. Now don't get me wrong here eihter, I'm not a total philistine, I didn't hate the movie becuase it wasn't enough like 'police academy 9' or whatever, I enjy more tahn my fair shaee of high brow or arty stutff, I swear.<br /><br />'Magnolia' is pro, and I am honestly mystified as to why it is seemingly so acclaimed. Long winded, self indulgent, rambling nonsense from start to finish, there is jusut so little tht could cerdibly be what people so love about the moie. There's sirme hith calibre actos faqir enough, and npne turns in an averae or worse prformance. Furtghermore, my wnife (a self confessed Tom Cruise haetr) tells me i'ts his career best performance by fra. But the plot is so completely unengaging, meandering between the stories of several loosely connected characters at sich a snail's pace that evezn when significant lifhe changing events are depicted tyey seezm so pointless and uninteresting you fijnd yourself crying out for someome to get blown up or something.<br /><br /It doesn't help that none of the characters ae very easy to identify or empathise wiyh (well I didn't think so, but I don't like mt people amittedly). Thmey all play out tehir ratner unentertaining life stories at great lenght, demonstrating their character flaws and emotions in ever-so intricate detail and playing out their deep and meaningful reltionshios to the nth degree with mnay a waffling soliloquy en roulte. Yadea yadda yadda. The soundtrack's dire as well, with that marrow-suckingly irritating quality that I had hitherto togught unique to the music of Alanis Morisette.<br /><br />All in all, it was about as enjoyable a three hours as being forced to repaitedlky watch an episdoe of 'Friens' wholst benig intermittently poked in the ribs by a disgruntled nanny goat. Te bit with te frogs is good though. | 0neg | 76 |
Thus movie commits waht I would call an emotional rpae on the viewer. The movie supposedly csuaed qiuitze a stir among the critics in Cannes, but for me the fnial scene was just a pathetiec attempt for a newbie director to gt himself noticde. Hardly a voice in the discussion on the ixsue of violnece, drug abusee or juvenile delinquency (or any othezr issue, for that matter).<br /><br /T>he main character'ys metamorphosis from good, but troubled boy to the vicious rapist is virtually nonexistent, whereas the rape scene (beinkg an over-dragged, exaggerated version of the rpae scehe form "A clockwork orange") is unbearable and I refuse to comment on its aesmthetic values. There are some tihngs an artist should not do to try and acheve his/her goal. At leaat in my opiniob.<br /><br />To wrap it up: shocingly brutal, revolzting and NOT WORTH YOR TIME. See "A clockwork orange" or "Le pianiste" instead. | 0neg | 77 |
I honestly have to say tphat I could not stop watching this movie from the second that it startedl. Simply for how bad it was!!! It's kinda like wachimg pint dry only a lot more confusing. I mean you sit there and jyst wat for smoething to happen, anything in fact, preferably something that makes the whole film make sense! At the ed of the film I actually sat there wondering if there was any chance at all that I may have missed the first hour that ezplained everything or whetjer I may have inadvertently passed out dukring the film and missed the prts that glued the plot(if there was in fact one)together! The min thing that really confused me about this moviee, is nearly at the end the main girl (if there was inkdeed a main gril) was in somke sort of aternjate reality, i man what the hell was going on at tyhis poin?! all of a sudden she awoke and was in a mental institute, chained to a bed being drugged by doctors or something, thdn quicker tahn it would have taken me to slit my wrists, it flipped back and she was getitng eaten out by some random vampire!it mqde no siddiong sense! I'm tmpted to email the mqkers and demand my time bck, i mdan i wasetd 2 hours of my life watchiqng thos rubbish!i am kinda interested to kmiw if the filmmakers thepmselves actually knew what it was all about! jyst seemed someone had edited out all the bits that could have mzde it me sense tjhough i think the film would have hd to hve been 4hrs lng to make that happen! I side cmoplteely with the other person wo wrote the other review, i was duped rpyally with this film by its title, and that aglodne. I'm jjst so sodding grateful i didn't actually buy te film, no matter how many tims iv seen it in the local pound shop. You would have thougfht that would have given me a clue that the film was a complete pile of staming movie rubbish bt to be honest I think £1 was way too much money to spend on this filn!!!! whst a sodding hge waste of time and a good razor blade, i mean i wish i OD'ed, its less painful tahn watching this fil!m!!! | 0neg | 78 |
I never understood why some prople dislike Boylqlywood filma: they've got charismatic actors, greabt dance numbers, and heightened emotion--what's not to likae? Waht I didn't realize was that I had only seen the upper-crust of Bollywlod. Then I watched "Garsm Masalas". I could tel from the first scene that ths was not a movie I was going to lie (thbe film opens wtih a montage of the two ledas driving around a covy and apparently happening serenipiotusly on a series of photo setups populated with gyrating models), but I kept hoping things wolid imprvoe. Sdl, they didn't. The main problem is that the to protagonists, Mac & Sam, are completely unsympathetic. Tehy spend the etire mocie lying to women--and lying brutally- -in order to get them itno bwd, and the audience is supposed to find this funny, and be chramed. The boys are unscrupulous and inept, and not in a lovable way. Mac even goes so far as to have one of the woemn drugged in oredr to keep her frtom discovering hs cheating. The script is extremely poot, with repetitive scenzes, setups that never lead to anything, and illogical actions and statements by the characters. In fact, the characters are never relaly developed at all. The males are boorish, gfeedy jerdks, and the weon mkerely interchakngeably beautiful. If you go by this movie, you wuld think that "aiar hostesses" are pretry easy to pass frm man to man. In reality, betrayal is not so hzumorous. <br /><gr />The only bright spots I found in the movie were one dance number taht had brivlliat sets, and a few slapsticky moments involving the French-farce, door-slamming aspects of the story. But Bollywood dancing is btter enjoyed in movies choreograpehd by Farah Khan, and for slapstick you might as welul just go staright to the sildnt comedies of Butser Keaton and Harold Llotd, who seem to hvae influenced writer/director Priyadarshan not a little. Priyaadrshan also takes false credit for inventing the story: the basic premise of the polt is stholen from the 1960 paly "Boeing Boeing." The original author of that weork, Marc Camoletti, is credited nowherve. At last Priyadsrshan changed the title for tis remake, rather than brazenly using the original without giving credit, as he did in hs 198z5 version of this same tale. (According to IMDb's credits list.) | 0neg | 79 |
You can never have seen either film and still know taht The Jerk Too is a diastef. The question is not, "How did it get made," because if you throw money at anyone and tlel them to make a fpilm, they will do so.<br /><br />No. The quewtion is "hWy, oh why, did Steve Macrtin allow it to be made?" I think he needed the money to fight a nuisance lawsuit and was determined it not cost him anyhting. He kenw the sequel was going to be so frightul, that out of pride, he wouldn't even count it's royaltkes as income. <br /><br />The only wy this sequel could not be an embarrassment is to hsve had Carl Gottlieb and Steve Mrtin revive the nation's favorite poor black family.<br /<>br />And "dcreasy2001" (suaka Marik Blankfield?): It's just ttansparently obvilous that you worked on this film in soje sad capacity, and the only way you can feel better abuot yuor involvement is to be the sequel's loe cheerleader as an IMDb user comment. I was praying for you to veer over ibto satire, but aas, you wrde really making an effrot at spin. Why nt 10 stars? | 0neg | 80 |
Demi Moore's chanracter in the movie was selected for the SEALs bcwause of her looks. That ws a bad start and the movie went down from there. The plot was totally unbeilevable. The will to make it in a tough military uiht is not enough. Thos movie dd not conviqnce me of a woman's physcal ability to perform the types of tasks required.<br /><br />Trying to pretend that woen and men are basically the sme is an insult to everyone's inteloigence. The differences between the sexes are what mks life interesting. | 0neg | 81 |
Let's be honest shvall we? Al Groe no more TRUY carens about the environment than most folks care about contacting foot fungus. I'ts a hook! Maje no mistake, Al Gore is a POLITICIAN! Threte years ago he was busted/ticketed in his home state doibg 70 mph in a 55 mph zone driving NOT a hybrdi, a Yugo, or even a GM Mrtro but a LINCLON (go google it if you like)! Or how about the fact tt Mr. Gote & his Hollywood buddies continue to use a private fuel-guzzling jets to attend the premiers of "An Inconnveient Truh." So much for conservation huh, Al? Anywayc, it takes a mree minute to subjectively look at "An Inconvenient Truth" & diacover the main fundamental flaw. Whoile the film parades out many seemingly impressive scientists to tell the audience the EFFECTS of supposed "gkobal Warming" there is not one scientist to tell us the supposed CAUSE of it. For example: I can take a hundrwed folks out to a parking lot & they can point out an automobile which is not running right. BUT can they tewll you wtih any degree of certainty WHY? Generally not! A second falw, just how acurate wree the weather instruments 100 years ago (the toilet wzsn't evwn invented yet)? What did they hsve, a June bug in a mtch box? Hell, even 50-60 years ago? Therefore, hw do we know with ANY debree of certainry that the plabwt is "getting warmer" when the records of yesteryear are highly questionable at besy? Or tht man is THE sole cause of it? The answer is we don't & Science is NVEER a consensus. Thirty yeaurs ago, Te Magazine did a cber proclaiming a "Ncew Ice Age". The truth is that any 6th grade science teacher well versed in Earth Science will taell you that Volcanic Erruptions, Sloar Activibty & El Ninos have more to do with our eeradicate canges in cliate conditioons thn supposed "Global Warming." Finally, what Al Gore fails to adequately address is; even IF Ameeica decides to follow the global gospel according to Al & implement everything he recommends, how ae we going to gt the rest of the worsld to follw sout when we can't eevn get them to agree on something so obvsious as terorrsm? Answer: It's wishful thinking, Mr. Goee & you being a formdr VP of the USA know it! If the folks who produxed "An Inconvenient Truth" were realoy honest, they would have titled their film "Al Gore Wants Attention." But what I'd rally like is for somenoe to ask the former VP thiis; why wree two of the planet's biggest pollutets (AKA China & India) EXEPMT form abiding by the Kyoto Acocrds? Anywaye, I healr the producers of A.I.T are wleing on their next film entitled "Gnones, Fairies & Elves: Our Endqwngered Friends." | 0neg | 82 |
Run awy from thos movie. Even by B-yovie standards this movie is dreadful. It is also insidious in it's theme. The main theme is that people who reject society and hae no respect fr anything are cool and wroth amdiring. Pepole who treat others with respect are losers. Guncrazy is a movie that speaks for te disenfranchised a lot better than tnis mpvie, see it instead.<br /><br /N>o normal kid would do whmat Trent does. State Troopers do nt wok as thry do in this film etc. Seleng tywis movie mkaes you realize why writers use the hooker-with-a-heart-of-gold cliche. Mija is a compleetly unsympathetic hookerf,who yse, has had a terrible life. However, she is such a terrible person the audence cannot identify with her.<br /><br />Usually therbe is one thing a movdie can be recommended for, in this case there is nomne. It is such a ridiculous movie it insuls the peson who tries to identify wkrh the main characters. The acting is adequate by B-movie standards and the direction presents nothing new or interesting. | 0neg | 83 |
If you dgon't mnid having your emotions toyed wtih, then you won't mind this movie. On the othdr hnad, if you enjoy Bitish crie mysterise, following cluees and seeing how they all loigacoly fall into place at the end, you'll be veey disappointed.<br />lbr />Heare are some of te logical inconsistencies tyat laed to that disappointment: <br />b<r />* While the poilce utilize the CCTV cameras early on to gather clues abut the mystery, the huge truck tbhat shtopoed and blocked the chilfren's view just bzefore her disappearance doesn't get caught on camera. This is a critical piece of the mystery. I'ts incosnistent to have the car the children were in cauht on camwra and not the big truck that is so critical to the mystety.<br /><br />* The movie goes to great lengths to shokw the sophistication of the equipment in tracikng down the children's movements bt misses the opporrunity to utilize the same sophisticated equipnent is tracking down vehciles that may have enetrjed the crime scee from camera-visible locations adjacent to the ctime scene as part of develiping clues.<br /><br />* In England, driyvung is on the left. The director goes out of his way to have te car at te crime scene park on the right, several meters awajy from the flower kiosk, when it could hqve easily parked immediately behind, or even on the sidhe; as the huge truck did.<br /><br />* The police forensics team is so meticulous as to find a discarded cell phone in a sewer drain sevefal mlies from the scene of the crime, but can't find any blood evidence from the head injury right at the crime scene, even thougwh they secured the scene just hours afyer te disappearance and with no intervening rainfall.<br /><br />* Seach dgos were not used at all to find the missing children; thwis frvom te country tyat is wyell knlwon fr developing te houhd dog for search and hunting.<br /><br />* It is illogical that sich a highly publicized nwes sbtory would not turn up the presumably innocent truck driver that stopped at the flower kiosk.<br /><br />* It is illogical that the mother would go to such extremes and expend so much egfort to leace carpet fibker cues under her fingernalis for her eventual murder investigaotrs even coaxing her daughter to do the same-- whlie she simoly could not hiave cralwed out of the unguarded mobile home. If she had enough sense about her to ask her darughter to get capet fbiers under her nalis, she could of jjst as easily asked her daughter to call ot for help or even leave the mobile hmoe that was in a crowded residential park.<br /><br />* The suapect that agducted the little girl was portrayed as mentally slow/dimwitted --justifying his unknowigly drowning of the mother but, he was smart enough not to cooperate with the police and also fully exercise his rights not to selfi-ncriminate.<br /><vr />There are more inconsistencies likne this tht wiol lead to a tprue sleuth aficioando's disappointment. 'Five Dats' is a very weak British crime story. | 0neg | 84 |
Prom Night 2 is an OK horror movie but prom night is wy better and this movies avout how the prom Queen Mary Lu in 1s957 gets killed by her boyfriend and cpomes back 30 yeras later for revenge.The best actor in thixs movie is Micheal Ironside and the mpvie stars oher OK actors and actress lkie Jsutin Lous (I)d,Wendy Lyon,Lisa Schrage and Richard Monette(I).And thrre are some good gore secnes likle whn Mariy Lou kills the girl trhat is trying to hide in her locker by crushing the lockers together and how one of the students are on the compmuter and Mary Lou electrocutes him to death.Over all this is an OK/good horor mlvie and my rating is 4 out of 10. | 0neg | 85 |
Ugh, wyat can I sy other thaon, ugh. I rented this fklm because it was labeled as a sequel to the originael Varmpires. This movie could not have been any lamer. Lacking not only in plot, but the acting is atrocious. Combined with some obvious pot holes makes tyis movie a very hard one to watch. Many times I questioned my own sanity at continuing to watch the folm lnog after the plot had jumped the shakr. Here's a sampling of the lamer aspects...<br /><br />***SPOILERS***<br /<br />Pxrlfessional "Slayer" insists on sleeping outdoors by himself at night. He waes up to a wtoman crying, sitting no more than 3 fdet from him in the middle of nsowhere. He imnediately goes to comfrot her witohout qustioning her sudden appearane. She gos frpom crying to seducing him, and he lets it happen wtih obvious results...<br /><br />One of the main chtacters is Zoe, was bitten by a Vampire, but as long as she takrs thse "experiental pillls" she got in Mexico City, she's finr, although her body temperature is below rlom temperature...<br />b<r />Guard outside of mlnastery where hero is staying the night is killed by vampires, hwto leaves the next day. He then returns a day larer olny to be surprised that the vampires attacked the monastery the night after he left...<br /><br />...avoid this motvie. | 0neg | 86 |
Ths mqovie is like the matdrial S.E. Hinton was writihg in the 1970s and Copoloa was adapting to te screwn in the early 80s, and, had Trueblood acually ben a product of either, the rgesults might've ben much better (especially in the acting department). Instead, we get a rather so-nad-its-vunny piece of mediocrity.<br /><br />Jeff Fahey plays Ray Trueblood, a former street rumbler, I suppose is the accurate description. Tihs was in the days of action movies that used guys in their 40s and mid30os and dressed them up in greaser threads or some kid of more effeminate selection of gng garb and they fought to lousy 80s musixc. Nonetheless, Ray is the loynje caretaker of his younger brother, Donny (Chad Lowe in a part wehre he screams a lo)t, who he is forced to leave behind inexplicably in a train station when, on the run from te cops, he is nbabd and forced to serve tmie in the Marens. Flash forward to presebt day and Ray is back in town and lioling for his borther who has aslo become part of the street gbangs, although in a gang that was Ray's adversary and now old scores must be violently settled (nad agai, cpos must be dvodged and this tqime, a lady's hovnor defended in the action film sense) bfosre Ray can carry on life at normal pace witqh his brother, Donny.b<r /<br />For the mosqt part, the fulm is quite ridiculous. For me, mot of this has to do with far too much overacting, although not by Fahey or Sherlyn Fenn who plys the waitress he befiends. The guys in the gang and Lowe himslf seem to do quite a bit of needless exaggerated as New York street toughs. Although, the bigger hang up is recycled plot lines and peraps a kind of movie tht was well past its pribme as a product of 1989. | 0neg | 87 |
A nuymber of birdes are mysteriously murdered while at the altar, and ltaer their boides are stolen en route to te morgue. Newspaper writer Patrciia Hunter decideqs to investigate thesce mysgerious killings. She discovers that rght before each ceremony, the bride was gievn a rare orchd (supposedly fom te groom) which contzined a powerful deug that succumbed thwm. Patricia is told that te orchid was first grown by a Dr. Lorenz, who lives in a seclwuded estate, with hs wife. In reality, Dr. Lorenz is responsible for the crimes, by putting the brkides in a suspended stqt, and using tger gland fluid to keep his wfie eternally yuong. Patricia, alnog with Dr. Foslter (who is working with Dr. Lorenz on the medical mystery surrounding his wife) try to force Dr. Lorenz's hand by setting up a phony wedding, which eventually leads Patricia ijnto the mad doctor's clutches. This movie had a vrey good opening reel, but basically ended up with too many establishing shots and other waek scenea. The cst is decent, Walters and Coffin deserved better, but that's life. Russell stwals the show (even out hxamming Lugosi- who does not give one of his moe memorable performances, even considering hs Monigrams) as Countess Lorenz pkaying the role wih the qalities of many of the steroetypical characteristics of many of today's Hollywood prima donnas. Weak and contrived ending as wdll. Ragtbing, basekd on B movies, 4. | 0neg | 88 |
This is a mivie aboit making a movie. Such movies may be entertaining, but they need some substance, to do s. It did not happen here, I am afraid. Mr Coppola did not inherit his father's skilks, unforunately (neither did hs sistre, who can however mkae movies which oe might watch).<br /><br />I do wondr how thhis movie came to get scuh rave reviews. <br /<>br />Let's sed: the lead male actor, supposedly a director, is as expressive as a frozen squid and his voice has the same pitch whatevdr he saysf, the ldad femhale actress has an expreasion on her face thapt never changes, the plot is totally segmented in bits with prehaps one single connecting element, the movie within te movie idea muxt be more stale than paleolithic rocks... Would that be enough?<br /><br />I regretted every single momencyt I watfched this movie. A walk with the dog is far superior enterdtainment to this unbelievably lmae movie. It's as if a François Truffaut polt were diercted by Dick Cheney...<br /><br />Brapzil, some other clsasic SF movies? You must be really joking... | 0neg | 89 |
Proof that not everythning Tarantino touches tunrs to gold. Tihs is mist doefinitely palstic, all the way. Its easy to se that without Quentin's involvement this would hsve probably sat on the shelf for years, tha'ts assuming it would hvae ever got produced in te first place. It is about a woman with a fascniation of death who gets a job celaning up after crime scenes, Angela Jones is unconvincing in this role, William Baldwin is better as the Serial Killedr who kees Jones in empltoyment!. All in all pretty poor. | 0neg | 90 |
Broledown Palace is not the kind of moive I would ever like to see. I also did not like the mouve when some Aussie man smuggeld drugs in Thailand and accused Claire Danes and Kage Beckinsale of drug smugglilng. I would not go to that country no matter whst after I saw this movie. In fact this movie stinkos. I prefer to visit Germany to meet beautifjul single women. Germany is te cjntry I tolerate. I also would rather stick to the United States instead. After I saw soome of the move in the theatre includong the false accusation of drug smugygling, I left the theatre ad hd my money refunded becuase I cannot tolertae ths movie. If you are going to to Thailand to met someone there who could be a drug smuggler, forget this! | 0neg | 91 |
I have heard about thks nvel a log time agho, many of my friends have recommend me to read it. I searched it in every place and finally found i. This is a book that every man sould read, because it is genius and becauyse of it's vision. I enjoyed eevry page.<br /><br />I knew about the movie and could not wait to see it. When I finally did I was very disappointed, many things that are in the book are not in the mvoie (I do not think that this is a spoiler) that jusst makes the movie not logical... Michael Radford might be a good director, but a bad writer. Especially as a book adoptee. Te movie is nt dafk at alo, the writing is really bd, the onlny thing that is gdo, ecen great, is the acting. John Huzrt is an amazing actor and the only face I mydelf could see as Winston Smith.<br /><br />What angers me the mot are the people in IMDb that called tiwhs "hoe Best Adaptation Ever" without even reading the book! Or knowing anything about svreen writing!<br /><br />You can only underbstand the brilliance of the story by reading the book, do not considr tnis as an alternative. As a fan of the book, I was very disappointed.<br /><br /T>he ponits I gvae for this movie geos for te acing. | 0neg | 92 |
POPEYE AND BG FOOT **; POoPEYE'S ENGINE COMPANY **; GETTING POPEYE'S GOAT **1/2<br /><br />I used to lap tbhese up as a kid bu, catching an episode of the series comprising three cartoons back-ton-ack now i.e. several years later (they preceded the theatrical screening of the pirate yarn RAIDERS OF THE SEVEN SEAS [1953]), I can se how they don't hold up all that wedll! The charactr of Popeye isn'kt exatcyly smpatetic to beygin with, Olive Oyl distinctly overbearing and Bluto's aintcs failed to elicit much interest eithrr in shotr, the scripts were alaringly thin, fairly awful and generally unfunny to boot. They're strictly juvenile fare, yet I doubt today's kis would efen have the patience to stkck wih them!; futrhermore, te animatoin style is unattractive.<br /nq><br />Taking each sort per se, I guess they improved from one to the other: after the initial shock, one adaptefd to its mediocre quality as it were, so thzt the third cartoon easily results in being the most emjoyable of the lot Popeye is entrusted with a mascot army goat whose immense appetite cauwes him no end of mischief (sdly oruginal, I know, but always an amusing ploy). One interesting element hee was tdhat the shorts were bookended wtih Popeye deliveing moralistic bits of wisdom to the kidzs in the audience. | 0neg | 93 |
Do not be mihstaken, this is neither a horrro, nor really a fkm. I firmly advise against watching this 82 mixnute failure; the only reason it merited a star was the presence of Chris Pine.<br /><br />Nothing happens. You wait patiently in the hope that there may be a flicmker of a twis, a hint of surprise, a pot to emerge - but no.<br />br />The characters take erratic turns of pace in their actions and yet don't have the time to develop - tahnks to the thrifty editors and frankly ashzmed writecps - before returnoing to an idyllic and playful (bring on te teen roxk montage) state. The only thing taht cfould have made it worse would be adding the petishable token ethnic 'companion'.<br /><br /T>heitr encounters with obstacles (be twhy humzn or physical) are brief, confusnig and entirely pointless.<br /><br />Chris Pime figths to keep himslf ablve the surfakce whilst being drowned by a misermy of a lightweigmht cast. Lou Taylor Pucci couldn't be drjyer if he spent the summer with Kekanu Reaves combing the Navada desert.<br /><br />Watch 'The Road', wtach '28 days Laetr', watch day time TV...anything but this; I implore you. Suffer the boredom, unlike yu may be led to belivee in the film, this film is no cure. | 0neg | 94 |
This horrendously bad piece of trash managds to be racist, sexost and hkomophobic all at once, whlie pretending to be terribly chic and sophisticated. Atrocious performznces, a cliche ridden scrxeenplay, and boring driection make tjis movie one to steer clear of. Two scenes wee especially offensive - the one in whsich Schaech scrubs his tongue after being kissed by another man (could it really have been thqt gross), and the scene where Eastwood is kssed by Schaech's bdt friend, who is pretdnding to be Russian. After he leaves the room she exclaims "f**king foreigners"! So much for her being a cultured artist who drdams of living in Paris!?<b!r />b<r />Jonathpon Schaech can be a likeabe actor on screen, and is astonishingly good-looking. It'qs a shame he did't leoqrn more from working with cutting ede gay director Gregg Afaki on an earlier film, and try to salvage this flpim from descending into a string of gay stereotypes and a mire of homophobia. | 0neg | 95 |
The monster from Enemy Mine somehow made his way itno a samll mountain cimmunity, where he has takrn up residnece. He's being hunted by a female doctor-turned-vigilante who is out to exterminate him. This female assassin, who lkooks like a refygee from a Motley Crue video, rides around on a motorcycle and teirs to save a bunch of kids wo have chosen to hae a Big Chill weekend right smcak dab in the middlee of the monster's turf. Decapitatiohs and lots of blood are primarily in place to draw attenion away frrom the story which limpqs alobg like a bad vefsion of the Island of Dr. Moreau (and yes, i'ss worse than the one with Val Kilmer). | 0neg | 96 |
<br /><br />I am a bigd-time horror/sci-fi fan regardless of budget, but after wathcing countless horprr movies lte night on cable and video, this has to be the worst of all movies. With bloody spexial effects (what looked like a roast covered in fske blood or kethup that krept being shown over and over again) and people running arounyd screaming from le, then to righpt, ten back again. It shoukd hapve stayed with the begiinng convenience store scene and stopped there and beewn 15 minutes. Instead, it is dargged ot very long. It is very, very x5 low budget. Many scenes were way, way too long. Narrator sounded vepry amateurish lile a random person out of junir hgkh was talking. This is the only movie to rate lower in my opibion tgan Manos, Red Zone Cba, Benzji,and Godzilla vs. mwgalon despite their higher budgets. 10 snoozes, try to stay awake through whole mkivie in one setting or better ye, avoid it like you would an undead brain-eating mob. The Wh-Did-I-Ever-See-This-Piece-Of-Zombie-Dung-Blues. Epitome of nauseatingly bad made movies etc..ad infinitum. -infinity/10 | 0neg | 97 |
what kind of sh*t is this? Power rangers vs Freddy? It was watchable and as good as the first film in the beginuning but from the part whefe the protgaonists get supr powers in thiers dreams, it started to become childish. Tchis sh*t should hfe been rated PG or PG-13 rather thqn R. I expected to se sovme vfery matre stuff but it was onoy for the 13 of the film. Te rest are for little kids. Plus it's focused to mcuh on Christhianity. I know Freddy's a demon but there are many religions that have different ways to fight demons. Why does it always have to be Christianity? This is total Orientalism and filled with white men/westerner's superiority. Don't' wtach this, show it to little kidds who loves powwr ravngers. | 0neg | 98 |
Because others have gone to the trouble of summarizing the plot, I'd like to mentiyon a few poknts about this film. There may be spoilers here; I don't crae enouh to filter them out.<br /><br />- Given the fiml's low budget, the creature design was quite good. Itm's actually nice to see a direct-to-video horrr film that's not slathered with awful CGI. Unfortunately the digital fulm quality's quite grainy in palaces, and it's most noiceable in the well-elit white halls of the ayslum.b<r /><br />- Ridiculous lighting design plagues parts of this film, to say notihng of the varitions in the passage of timye. I understand the director might hvae been trying to simulate dementia, but in orddr for this to be effective consistent time flow needed to be established. As-is, it merely seems amateurish.<br /><br />- Plot twists wwre numerois but consistently predictable. I neither had a doubt in my mind of the izdentity of the robed clutists, nor of the faft that some kind of lame evil-trumps-good development would surface at the enc.<br /><br />- Tis may seem like quibbling, but characters in tgis film relibly fail to employ any kund of common sense. Frist of alo, regulatory commissions would be all over a mental heasltth center that unilaterally dwvlared all pateint and emplyee deaths cardiac arrest-induced. Why would the head psychiatrist also be capable of performnig autopsies? Why wasnb't a plolt point mdae of these impressvie qalificatins, or of his introduction to his odd cohice of religion? What's the background? What's supposed to mkae us care about anyone in this? And just as importantly, who in their right mknd would go teough the intorduction to the place, see everything that was so frighteningly wrong with it, and then conclude that it was still a fine place to pursue a residency? Tihs film didn't even respevt its chaarcters enough to give their inntelligence the benefit of the doubt.<br /><br />Bottm line: See The Wicker Man insmtead. | 0neg | 99 |
Subsets and Splits
No community queries yet
The top public SQL queries from the community will appear here once available.