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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [19 F] with my friend [19 M], not sure if I may have messed things up already.
POST: Hello hello everybody. I hope this isn't too trivial of a question to ask on here, but I've been feeling a bit out of my depth when it comes to this situation (I've had only one relationship before, and for many reasons, it was out of the ordinary).
Okay! So, a couple of weeks ago, I started talking to this guy on Facebook, through a student group that we were both part of. I thought he was sort of cute, so I sent him a PM just to talk, etc, etc. We're both transfer students at the same school, so I knew that we could eventually meet in person once we both moved on-campus. So, we did, and we hung out maybe twice, just as friends.
Okay. So, everything is going pretty well. We talk over Facebook and Snapchat, whatever. So, Saturday night, I was just hanging out with people and kind of being bored, when I got a Snapchat from him asking what I was doing. I asked if he wanted to hang out, so we did.
We ended up smoking pot (the first time for me, ever), and sort of just wandering around. Eventually we ended up back at his dorm room, where high me decided to just go for it, and I came on to him pretty strongly. It worked out for me (luckily, otherwise things would have been really super awkward), and we ended up messing around but not having sex.
Yesterday, however, I ended up going to hang out with him again, and this time we did sleep together. Afterward, we kind of discussed what we were going to do, and he just said that he wanted to "play it by ear" and not slap any labels on anything. I'm wondering if this means that he wants a fwb-type situation, or if he might actually be interested in me. The way I've been acting is extremely out of character for me, and I am not interested in having a fuck buddy. I like him, and I would be very interested in maybe seeing where things go, but I'm worried that I may have ruined my chances of a relationship by sleeping with him already.
TL;DR: | Started talking to someone online for a few weeks, started dating, ended up sleeping together, I'm just out of my depth. | Met a guy through Facebook, hung out with him a few times, talked/smoked pot together, and he seemed open to a fwb-type situation, but we haven't talked since yesterday. Is this a good idea? | Went on a first date with a guy, and we ended up sleeping together. After that, he said that he wanted to play it by ear, and that nothing was set in place. Does this mean that he might be interested in me? |
SUBREDDIT: r/Parenting
TITLE: My 11 year old sons friend died suddenly, his funeral is today and my son suddenly doesn't want to attend.
POST: **repost from relationships**
A couple of weeks ago my sons friend died in a freak accident, it was completely shocking and horrific. He isn't aware of the details, but we broke the news to him as soon as we found out and have spoke about it many times with him.
He has cried about it, asked questions and spoken about it with his older siblings (who have also recently lost a friend) and seemed to be okay with it (considering the circumstances).
Leading up to the funeral, we have talked about it and explained what he is to expect, etc. This is his first funeral, so we have made sure that he is aware of everything.
But today is the day, and he has broken down in the morning and says he doesn't want to go. I have no idea what to do. Do I push him to go? I am worried that he will regret it later, as he is a kid who doesn't like to do new things. But at the same time, I don't want to pressure him to do something he doesn't want to do.
Advice, please?
TL;DR: | My sons friend died suddenly and is now asking to go to his funeral. Should I push him to do it? | My son's friend died and I am struggling between whether to have him attend or not, and not wanting to pressure him to go. | My 11 year old son has a funeral today, and says he doesn't want to attend. Do I push him to go? Or am I being crazy? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: The girl [26 F] I [22 M] have been seeing for a month didn't respond to me at all yesterday while hanging out with a friend [~30? M].
POST: She gets terrible service while at her house, but I texted her 3 times yesterday, 4-5 hours apart. She didn't call me until early this morning and left a voicemail that she was busy all day with a friend who showed up out of the blue.
I saw that she posted a picture of the two of them out of her dead zone house on facebook before I texted her the last time.
I don't mind that she hangs out with friends, and I know it's pretty early in the relationship, but am I wrong to be a little annoyed that she didn't respond until 24 hours after my first text?
TL;DR: | Girl is not responding to me after a day of hanging out with a friend. | The girl I've been seeing for a month didn't respond to me at all yesterday while hanging out with a friend. Am I being too overprotective or is she just getting over a situation? | I texted this girl twice, 4-5 hours apart, and she didn't respond until 24 hours after my first text. Is this normal? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by accidently kicking an old woman
POST: So this didn't happen today but actually about a year or two ago.
I was at my granddads funeral so of course it was all very sad and full of lots of crying old people. After the ceremony everyone walks outside the building and onto the other side of the small road the hearses drive down. Now the road is important because obviously if there's a road, there's a curb onto the sidewalk, so most of us are on the other side of the road, besides a few older people walking a lot slower.
As one of the old woman goes to walk up the curb she trips (obviously didn't notice there was one due to crying and whatnot) and I'm the only one who not only sees it coming but is in any position to do anything. So of course as someone who is an avid football (soccer if you're American) player my first instinct is to stick my foot out and kind of control her head like you would with a football.
Of course you can imagine this looked horrendously bad on my part (quite literally kicking an old woman while she's down) and as she got up everyone noticed that her nose was completely grey/black as if she'd just been punched in the face. She assures us she's fine and we go to the dinner afterwards where someone finally informs her of her bruising. She goes to the toilet and comes out with a completely normal looking nose so of course everyone's wondering how and it turns out that the "bruising" was actually shoe polish from my shoe, confirming to everyone that i kicked this poor old lady square in the face as she fell.
TL;DR: | TIFU by my first instinct is to keep her foot in control. Of course, as soon as she gets up and gets out of the building she runs right out of the building on to a curb. | I unintentionally caused a severe eye swelling/bruise on someone and everyone realised it afterwards. | accidentally kick an old woman when she's falling and no one knew so i kicked her in the face. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [32 M] found out my wife [31 F] had an affair a year and a half ago, now I can't stop thinking about other women.
POST: Wife and I moved accross the country with our two daughters <our dream.
We settle in, happy, rosey veiws, living the dream or so I though. 6mo later she sleeps with a co-worker. I find out about it four months later on my birthday. Shit hits the fan at home and work - she and d-bag are fired. Did I mention she work for a Christian organization?
Fast forward 18 months - today. I don't have a marrage - rather - a roomate who's the mother of my children. She's too fragile to say I want out, but I want out.
Do I pursue an "affair" or just flip the world upside down my kids and leave?
TL;DR: | wife's ex-fiancé cheated on her but doesn't want to tell me about it. now i'm wondering if i should continue the relationship or leave. | Wife is unfaithful. Don't want anymore kids. | Wife cheated. I want the world. What do I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/loseit
TITLE: Caffeine addiction. Anyone taking vitamins or supplements with caffeine?
POST: I have a horrible caffeine addiction, and I don't like sacrificing any of my daily calories for coffee. I used to drink 5-6 Diet Dr. Peppers a day, but I have switched to almost exclusively drinking only water most days. I do have a Diet Dr. Pepper occasionally, and I know that technically it's okay to probably have one a day, but I honestly just feel better all around when I drink only water. But if I don't have some caffeine in the morning, I will be writhing in the floor in pain with a skull-pounding headache by mid-day. I know. Ridiculous, right?
So, I went to the vitamin aisle the other day in search of a supplement with a little caffeine and the only thing I found was One A Day Adult Vitacraves Gummies with Energy Support. Here's the website with [nutritional info] One serving is 20 calories and has 90 mg of caffeine. There's also some vitamin B6, B12, and folic acid in there that supposedly helps turn food into energy. I have no idea if that's true. I've been taking them a couple days, and so far I do feel more energized and I haven't had any headaches. The issue is that one bottle is around $9 and there are only 60 in a bottle. You have to take 4 (4!) a day, which is very intriguing considering the brand name and all. So it'll cost me around $20 a month. Which is admittedly cheaper than what I used to spend on Diet Dr. Peppers, but still. I was just curious if anyone else had a better option for caffeine in a supplement or vitamin?
TL;DR: | I have a terrible caffeine addiction, and I don't like sacrificing any of my daily calories for coffee. I used to drink 5-6 Diet Dr. Dr. Pepper a day. I'm wondering if anyone has a better option for caffeine. | I have a caffeine addiction. Anyone on a vitamin or supplement with caffeine? | Have a horrible caffeine addiction, need a way to get some in the morning without breaking the bank. Found the new Vitamin B6, B12, and Folic Acid for energy support. Wondering if anyone else has a better alternative for caffeine. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by eating a banana.
POST: So, this actually happened yesterday. I am currently studying abroad in a tropical country. As a result, the selection of locally grown fruit is phenomenal. Now, I'm not usually one for bananas, but I keeping hearing they are much more flavorful here, so I decided I'd give it a go and bought a small bunch from the local market. Yesterday morning, I decided I'd have one for breakfast along with my usual corn flakes. After I wash it down with coffee, I immediately start feeling like crap, but one of my roommates had a stomach bug over the weekend, so I just automatically assume that I must have contracted said bug and rush off to my four hour class. Four hours of hell, that is. As soon as I sit down, my nose becomes a waterfall with off and on sneezing fits. Next, cue the most god awful indigestion and acid reflux I have ever experienced. I keep telling myself that I only have to make it to 1 o' clock, then I can just go to bed. Easier said than done, but I finally get home and find little success in napping. Once I get up, I discover that I have a nice little rash starting in each armpit, which I chalk up to having switched deodorants just that morning. Finish off a bottle of Maalox with some advil and commenced sleep attempt number two. I wake up a little more clear headed this time and begin to assess my situation. The rash is now worse and I start wondering, what if the deodorant didn't cause the rash? Is there a single thing that could possibly explain all of my symptoms? I started to ask myself out loud, "Did I eat anything today that I don't usually..... oh, shit." In an instant my fingers were flying on Google to search "banana allergy" only to find a multitude of symptom lists that pretty much specifically described my day of hell. By this time, my face had even started to swell a bit, but now knowing what I was up against, I bought some benedryl, had a couple of beers and went back to sleep. Woke up this morning feeling much better, and unlike Pam Poovey, I will not continue to stuff my face with foods I know I am allergic to. No more bananas. Ever.
TL;DR: | Tried to eat a banana. Now having to eat something I won't eat. | I ate a banana, ended up getting a rash in each armpit, then a rash in each armpit, and now I can't sleep. | went on a trip to a new country, tried a bunch of local food, ended up at the hospital and found out I'm allergic to bananas. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [16F] have been dating my bf [16M] for 2 years and have not done anything sexually yet, is this alright?
POST: Hi guy's I just need some advice to calm my nerves.
So I have been dating this guy for 2 years since we were the age of 14. The most we have done is make out and cuddle, that's it nothing more.
We are only 16 and I was wondering is it a bad thing we have not done anything sexually for the 2 years we have been dating? because you hear of people taking it slow, but are we going to slow?
I have not spoken to him about this, but I just need an outside opinion on this before I do. Because I don't want to mess this up, I really love this guy
TL;DR: | has been dating for 2 years, am I being crazy? | I have been dating my bf for 2 years, but I don't know if we are going to slow up, because I don't want to mess this up. | dating my bf for 2 years, have not done anything sexually, am I wrong for being concerned? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: My fellow redditors! Within reason.. turn your ridiculous ideas into porn!
POST: Soo there isn't a question in the headline.. How about.. Reddit, what kind of porn would you make if you could?
Be respectful. I may be a whore, but I'm a human being above all else!
I am in the process of developing a website for my alter ego porn star.
I've decided that aside from all the normal boring porn stuff that I want really memorable pornos. Full length movies or short clips.
So far we are having a scenario where I am dared to suck off a corpse in a morgue.
I'm also going to fuck every super hero to which a costume is available and I am particularly excited about that!
Giant mud pit. Need I say more?
Sadly, unicorn porn was already made...
So, in this vast pool of insane and colorful minds that is reddit.. I ask you to share with me elaborate or not so elaborate ideas for porn. They don't all have to be silly, some things you legitimately might want to see and never do or never see enough of it.
In all seriousness your idea could get turned into the real thing and if it does I will send you a free copy of the production so you can show your friends!
TL;DR: | I have a great idea for a porn fanfuck. How would you make it a reality? | What kind of porn would you make if you could?
**EDIT:** As an extra incentive you can send me a free copy of the entire production. Don't let the idea that you can get a free copy of it go to your head and make you feel like you are special. | I'm going to make porn with you reddit. I want to find awesome ideas and turn them into real life porn. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [18M] questioning if I should ask out my friend [17F]
POST: Ok so perhaps this isn't the most dramatic thing you have seen on this subreddit but I feel like I'm stuck.
I have been friends with this girl for a while now asking her and things were going great until I asked her to prom. I am hoping this will be a great night however ever since I asked her a couple weeks ago I find I can no longer talk to her. Out conversations are awkward with me trying to start the majority of topics (Badly written but you get the picture)
I really like the girl but i'm wondering if she saw too much into the prom-posal. Should I just give up, or ask her out? Im not sure
TL;DR: | asked a girl out, asked her out, she got me in trouble. | Asked out a friend, don't know if she saw too much into it | Asked girl out to prom, she didn't know and asked me out and now things are awkward. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Cock blocked by a friend (Who's a girl).
POST: So for the past week there's been this girl in one of my classes I've been talking to, she's pretty cute (dyed red hair, fair skin, a few freckles, not ginger), she loves star wars and I suspect she's a redditor. I was going to ask her for her number today, but a girl i met about a year ago came and sat right where the red head had been sitting, effectively cock-blocking me and driving the girl I was interested in away. Now it seems like the red head thinks I'm uninterested in her and has since found some other guy to talk to. Has anybody been in a similar scenario? Advice?
TL;DR: | Girl i like is a girl i've been talking to for a while. How do i get her to stop dickblocking me? | Girl i'm interested in got blocked by a friend who's a girl. Advice? | girl I was going to ask for her number today was blocked by another girl. Now she thinks I'm uninterested. Advice? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Wife's "friend" is stealing money. Any ideas on how to approach this?
POST: So my wife has a friend that I will call Julie. My wife and Julie have been friends for about 6 years if I remember correctly. Julie is a shit friend in my opinion and I have told the wife my feelings. When they lived together Julie would start physical fights with my wife and spat on my wife's face once. Now when Julie comes over to our house there is a 98% chance that something will be broken and really really dirty when she leaves.
Julie does not have any other good close friends in our town and her closest family is 5 hours away. I am thinking that is why my wife doesn't get rid of Julie. About 7 months ago we were all outside and Julie said that she needed to go inside to use the restroom. As we soon outside I noticed that our bedroom light turned on, stayed on for less than a minute, and then went off.
Later that night after Julie left when the wife and I went inside and the wife discovered that her purse had been moved and that she was missing $20. I looked at my stuff and my checkbook had been moved. The only other person in our house that night was Julie and she was left alone.
On Saturday my wife went shopping with Julie. Again for some reason my wife left her purse with Julie alone. Today my wife was trying to buy gas and is now missing $30.
Before Julie started to steal from us her car battery died and she called us. Stupidly I paid for and installed a new one for her. I still haven't been paid back for that $87.
I am trying to figure out if it is time for me to say something to Julie or do I let the wife handle it?
TL;DR: | Wife's friend is stealing money from me and I need advice on how to approach. | Wife's friend is stealing money from us, how do I approach this? | My wife has a friend that is stealing from her. Should I say something? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU bY brushing with Baking Soda without learning how to do it correctly.
POST: Always wanted White Teeth but never visited the dentist since I was 8 due to fear [gotten bad experience as a kid].
So I heard that baking soda makes your teeth white if you brush your teeth with it.
What I didn't get from all the reading, is that though it is supposed to be made into a paste, it shouldn't still be gritty.
I always kept my baking soda paste gritty by putting very little water.
After brushing straight with it for three months, my gum was extremely sore, but on the up side is, it is true, it is all true, I am amazed myself ! My teeth is very VERY white now compared to the past and even when taking pictures, the teeth becomes the center of attention simply because of how white it is, even my friends jokingly asked if I have painted it white.
These are the images after baking soda brushing for months, understand that I have NEVER visited a dentist ever since I was 8:
As my ego grew, I forget about the irritation from the gum and keep on using it.
One fine day, my gum gave up...I was brushing and I saw a nice chunk of my gum get physically brushed OUT of my teeth, I was shocked and at a lost of what I should do...I tried to piece the gum back in hoping that it would stay, suffices to say by the very next day, the gum eventually fall off.
It is not that visible if I don't smile too big, but let this be a lesson to all of you out there, baking soda paste works, BUT PLEASE, make sure the paste is not gritty, PLEASE...don't experience this ever.
TL;DR: | aking soda is made out of white paste, I have never visited a dentist and know my gum is really white. | Brushed with baking soda from 8 years old to past 1 month, gums gets painful due to lack of teeth and teeth is now the center of attention. | Baking soda pastes are amazing and the only thing is that it should not be gritty. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [27M] with [27F] was she the one that got away?
POST: Basically this is just something that has been bugging me for a while and want to know what you guys think. I met this girl Cara when I was in college. We were both in long distance relationships throughout college so we never dated, but I flirted my dardnest with her.
Fast forward to graduation, I end up breaking up with my LDR and Cara moves about two hours away, gets engaged. I would talk to her semi-regularly during this time.
Some time passes and she gets ready to move far away to grad school, I'm bummed by this, but she keeps saying she wants to see me before she leaves. We plan a night to go to dinner. She drives the two hours down to my house, we have an awesome night out, dinner, drinks. Go back to hang back at my house. I so desperately want to make a move, but the whole thing about her being engaged and not wanting to make things weird get in the way. We hug, say our good byes, and I figure that's the last time I'll see her maybe ever.
She texts me at 3 AM when she gets home and says she wants to hangout again. Now I'm really thrown through a loop.
She comes back down two days later, we go out for drinks again and we end up watching fireworks on a freaking boat. I was so god damn close to just kissing her but I didn't do it. And now she's married.
Did I fuck up? Was I just reading too much in to it? She was a pretty conservative girl (never saw her flirting with other guys). None of her friends really liked her BF and would sometimes insinuate that we would be better together. Not that any of this matters at this point.
When I get drunk I think about texting her asking if I should have made a move that night, but never actually do it.
Thoughts?
TL;DR: | Me kissed a girl that I was in a long distance relationship with, cara of four hours away in between my time together that i broke up with her. Is she being used to get away from me? | Was she the one that got away? Was I wrong for not acting on the one night we went out? Was I just reading too much into it? Did I fuck up? | I got to know girl for a few months, she moved 2 hours away, she's engaged, I'm still in love with her, but don't know what to do. |
SUBREDDIT: r/offmychest
TITLE: My dad's in the hospital, again. Need to vent a bit.
POST: My dad just turned 83 last week. The (sort of) short version of the chain of events is this. Last year he fell in the shower then didn't go to the doctor. For about the next 3 days he got weaker and more tired. He started hallucinating (seeing his dead brother in the room, etc.) so my mom got him to the hospital. He had lost a lot of blood through presumably some internal bleeding. They got more blood in him and stabilized so after a week he went home. He recovered pretty well.
Fast forward to October and one morning he couldn't get up off the couch, had no energy and was looking really bad, so back to the hospital he goes. He spent two weeks there this time (and had to miss my brother's wedding) because it was an infection in his blood and it took a while to get the right antibiotics in him to knock out the infection.
Three days ago my dad was back in the hospital again for being weak and hallucinating. Low on blood again so they've given him more, but he's still too weak to get out of bed, so we don't know how long he'll be there.
I'm starting to get really worried that he doesn't have much time left. He *just* retired about 3 months ago, and to think that now he could be near the end really sucks. He has lived to an older age than all of his siblings except one half-sister. I'm only 37 and I'm not ready to not have my dad around.
Not really looking for comments or advice, but just needed a place to write it out. Thanks for reading.
TL;DR: | My dad is in the hospital, again. He's recovering well now, but has lost a lot of blood. His life is over. | my dad's in the hospital again. He's weak and dying and I'm worried he doesn't have much time left. | dad's been in the hospital twice already in a 3 month time period, he's too weak to get out of bed, and he's going to die. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Advice for dealing with a non-binding HOA and restrictive covenants.
POST: I posted this over in advice, but I only got one response, so I'm trying here...
A neighbor of mine received a letter in the mail today stating that the HOA was taking action against him for keeping chickens on his property.
The letter arrived normal post, and it described that keeping a chicken coop was against the neighborhood covenant and that he had been previously warned about the infraction. It also stated that he would be responsible for the attorney fees and any and all legal fees associated with pursuing the case in court.
Being a non-binding HOA, I assume that they are only able to enforce the covenants outlined in the deed for the property which was created by the now-no-longer builder of the neighborhood 35ish years ago. We've gone to the zoning department to view the original deed to the property and they said that the covenant was too old to enforce.
Here is the particular covenant that the HOA is referencing:
*No noxious or offensive activity shall be carried on upon any lot, nor shall anything be done thereon which may be or may become an annoyance or nuisance to the neighborhood. No hogs, goats, poultry, cows or horses which shall constitute a nuisance or cause unsanitary conditions, or any undesirable situation to any neighboring property, shall be maintained on any lot.*
Does anyone have any advice with how to proceed?
Can a covenant on a deed really be too old to enforce?
How would you read "which shall constitute a nuisance" in the statement above?
We're looking in to getting an attorney but just ignoring them seems a might bit cheaper.
Some fun facts:
He has eight chickens, the coop is approximately 5' by 4' and 5' tall. The run is about 20 feet square.
We live in the county so there is no ordinance against keeping small flocks of chickens.
Many other neighbors keep small flocks of chickens. (I keep chickens and bees.)
We do not pay dues to the HOA.
The attorney referenced in the latest letter lives in our neighborhood.
TL;DR: | HOA is taking a lease on all chickens on his property and is not enforcing it. He has a legal deadline on the lease to submit it. How do I proceed? | Neighbor is being charged for a violation that is not mentioned in the HOA's deed. How should he proceed? | neighbor had a non-exclusive HOA take action against him for keeping chickens. How do we proceed? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Why does my (24F) boyfriend (25M) of four months make these kinds of comments to me?
POST: I know we are all human here, and we all find people attractive. I'm happy to discuss beautiful people with my SO, but over the last few days a few comments just seem unnecessary. Why do you find it necessary to tell me that you like the way some reality show girl moved her mouth, ("Ooo, I like THAT.") Or, when discussing acceptable age differences in relationships, tell me that you would gladly fuck a 15 year old but not date her. This stuff feels hurtful but I cannot intellectualize why. It feels very sexually aggressive and almost disrespectful.
Is it unreasonable that this stuff makes me uncomfortable? We have been dating for about 4 months now, and I feel like this is just a sign of sloppiness. I reacted in the moment to his comment about that girls mouth, saying "okay cool, I'll leave you to look at girls mouths and I'll head home." and then he will cling to me saying "no, don't go," kissing me, telling me he loves me..... I've also noticed an increase in the amount of "play" kissing (I don't know if other people do this, but it's just a playful kinda mouth thing...) versus actual kissing. I've been staying over his apartment (or he stays with me) most every night since we became monogamous. I'm wondering if this is all a sign that he is just comfortable and expects me to be there all the time. Maybe some distance would be good. I'm afraid though that he will interpret me spending less time with him as a decrease in affection, however...
Why do some dudes act like this? I am not sexually inhibited. I casually sexed a good deal while single, and I can recognize an attractive man. But I don't feel compelled to inform him in the way he seems compelled to inform me.
So I guess my main curiosities are: Is this a typical dude thing? Is it a sign of comfort level in the relationship? Is he being rude or am I just projecting my own insecurity?
TL;DR: | I think this is an example of the dudes behavior. It's not. What is up with it? | why does my boyfriend make comments about how he likes certain things in women that make me feel weird? I feel like he's being sexist/arrogant/sexually aggressive. | Boyfriend makes comments about girls mouths. Is it a normal thing to do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by emptying the vacuum
POST: So my wife and I are adopting two kittens today and have been preparing the kitten room, cleaning thoroughly and setting everything up. Vacuuming was my job, and I was doing a damn good job (IMO). I should inform you that we have one of those Dyson Cyclone vacuums that has the cylinder that you detach and then press the button to empty from the bottom. So I detach the cylinder and hold it over the trash bag to empty. I press the button-dust, dirt and hair ALL OVER the floor while only a small amount made it into the bag. I curse silently, turn the vacuum back on and go to work. I had gotten most of it back into the vacuum when the garbage bag was caught by the vacuum and tipped over, spilling the rest of the vacuum's prior contents onto the floor. I cursed again (not silently this time) and cleaned the rest of it up. Such a simple task and yet, TIFU.
TL;DR: | TIFU by vacuuming, dump thevacuum and clean everything up, then turn to make room for a new dog. | TIFU by emptying the cyclone vacuum's bottom while wearing high heeled shoes. | TIFU by emptying the Dyson Cyclone Vacuum's cylinder while holding it over a trash bag to empty. |
SUBREDDIT: r/personalfinance
TITLE: $200 phone bill in one night
POST: So I lost my phone for a few weeks, then yesterday I found it. I looked up my plan and had 5gbs of data left and two days in my plan. I didn't want to waste it so I googled how much data streaming a movie would take and it said 1-3gbs so I decided to use my phone as a hotspot and watch I'm Still Here on Netflix. Woke up in the morning to a $150 fee added to my $40 phone bill. I called them and the guy I spoke to initially estimated 3-4gbs for a movie, but when I pointed out I had apparently used 7 he thought that was normal too. He straight away said he could get half of the bill knocked off, and I just agreed to that because I (clearly) am not very technologically informed. I guess I'm just frustrated that their automatic setting for going over your data is to charge you $70 a gb instead of just adding their $10 1gb data pack to your plan and then they can't even text me to let me know until I've already blown through $150 worth. I received 3 emails (even though they manage to text me about paying my bill) about four hours after I watched the movie saying I was 50%, 75% and 100% over my data limit, and then another few hours later finally got a text saying I'd used all my data. Can/should I do anything about this or should I shuttup and pay my bill?
TL;DR: | I want the $80 bill to go to a $300 phone bill but it's got to be 2-4gbs, so I don't know what to do in the case of a $300 bill, or what to do if I get hacked. | Phone bill is $150 with no notification of $70 of over my data limit | I was over my data limit and they automatically charged me $70 for it. What should I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [19M] Just discovered that my GF [19] has been lying to me about our long distance relationship.
POST: Be sure to explain in detail with line breaks.
I live in Oregon, she's attending school on campus in Utah, but lived in Oregon. I visit her once a month for about a week. Last visit (march 31-apr6) she was super distant and snappy towards me, I brushed it off assuming she was stressed with school and work
Four days ago (4/16) she says that she thinks we should take a break so she can focus on school and work, but when she comes home for the summer (June) we'll be stronger.
I was recently hanging out with one of our mutual friends and she asked me how we were doing. I told her about our break and she decided to Facetime her. I stayed in the room and listened (instant regret)
My GF of almost one year (April 25th) was talking with passion in her voice about this dark skinned handsome boy genius who owns his own business at 21, and that she's spent the night at his house three different times. Our friend asked her if they did anything she responded with "Not what you think but two other things." My stomach sank and I just don't know how to handle this.
I'm going to call her when she gets off work in about an hour and confront her about it.
TL;DR: | Gf lied about our long distance relationship to me in a non-sexual way, I'm going to make her tell me what she did but I don't want to scare her. | GF lied to me about our long distance relationship, she's been spending time with a guy she's been seeing for a few months. | I'm going to confront my GF about her lying about our long distance relationship. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: I know this is going to sound selfish, but I'm going through a pretty rough time myself too, and I need to vent.
POST: I'm sorry that this is just another one of those tired old sob stories on AskReddit, but I think that I've reached a point that I can no longer keep this all in. I'm a 26-year-old postgrad with a BA in Political Science from the University of Miami, and it's been incredibly hard to find employment. I just want to do work locally; I've written to so many consulting firms and political groups over the past couple of weeks that my fingers have been starting to form calluses. I may be unable to pay rent at the end of the month and I can't afford a plane ticket to Milwaukee to visit my family for Christmas. I don't want to ask for their help because of the shame.
Getting a college degree was a huge accomplishment for me because of my intermittent problems with depression that never seem to end. I've gone through the campus in the past to get psychological treatment, but because I am no longer a student /and/ I'm being dropped from my health insurance provider, I'm running out of the medication I need. I tried so many different drugs in the past - I've been on Zoloft, Sinequan, and Abilify - now I'm taking, every day, .5mg to 1mg clonozepam as needed, 1.5mg bupropion (Wellbutrin) twice daily, .5mg uranium, .25mg viloxazine, and to top it all off, I'm getting back on Abilify. I don't want to need to take the drugs, and I want to be productive with my life. I just don't know where to turn to next.
TL;DR: | m having trouble getting work, and I need advice on how to get the best out of my situation. | can't afford the costs of healthcare and there's no health insurance to speak of, and I need some advice on what to do next. | m depressed, I'm getting back on my meds and trying to get into a decent job, but I don't know what to do next. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [24 M] interested in a university coursemate [22F] over the last 10 weeks, how do I ask her out?
POST: I'm a uni student, and every monday I take this particular 3 hour module. Now there's this girl in the course, which we shall call Mandy, who is very active in class. The particular course is a gender studies-related course, but her responses in class have set her apart from the other girls, because she does not give typical feminine responses, yet she has shown herself to be a very spunky person.
On the other hand, I'm also one of the more active contributors in class, as I'm one of the few guys in class, and I'm the one most likely to speak my mind, usually about controversial topics. And there have been times when we have been involved in arguments during the classroom.
Anyway, I've found myself interested in her around 3 weeks into the class, because I was very attracted by her personality and her brains. I also found out that she was actually from my year, and I've tried finding opportunities to talk to her before or after class. Usually we will sit in separate rows in class, because she would usually sit with her friend, and I would sit with my group of friends. But last week, I just went to sit beside her, and tried my best to seem natural about it. I don't think she minded, because as far as I could tell, she's not really close to any of the coursemates. In fact, every time I see her out of class, she's not interacting with others, even the people who were sitting beside her.
However, until now, I haven't had an opportunity to ask for her number, because I didn't want to scare her off. I wanted to add her on Facebook, but she doesn't have an account. The class is going to end in two weeks time, and I really want to grab this opportunity to at least ask her out before I possibly never see her again. Even if it doesn't work out romantically or anything like that, I would love to have her as a friend, because I think she's awesome that way, but I just don't know how to get closer to her. Please help!
TL;DR: | Interested in a girl who is active in class, but is also a bit of a loner, how do I ask her out on this opportunity? | How do I ask out a chick from my course, with no prior knowledge of her, because I'm looking for an opportunity to ask her out before I see her ever again. | A girl I really like in class asked me to sit with her in class, so I just went to sit with her, and I want to ask her out, but I don't know how to get closer to her. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [23/f] American girl studying abroad just started a sexual relationship with a [25/m] Chinese boy. Need advice!
POST: So, I am an American student studying Chinese language at a university in China. I met a grad student here majoring in English and we really hit it off, right from the day we met. I am a rather bold, outgoing girl who was raised in the New Jersey/New York area. He is from a small rural area of China. However, since he has been studying English language and American culture, we actually have quite a bit in common (like discussing politics, social issues, cultural differences, and Sino-American relations) we instantly connected. I was actually surprised at how quickly things progressed. I am only the second girl he's ever kissed, and the first girl to "go all the way." Overall, we are happy with the no-strings-attached, mutually language-sharing/studying, and close friendship that we've developed.
Here's the problem: he is very self conscious, and tends to over-think during our romantic liaisons. This can have some flaccid consequences. I've tried to be as understanding, helpful, and supportive as possible. I told him to think with his heart rather than his head when we have our trysts, but he has difficulty putting aside his worries and poor self-image.
Has anyone else been in a similar situation when seeing a Chinese boy? Any advice is appreciated on how to teach him to let loose and enjoy himself without worrying about appearances or his lack of experience. I want him to enjoy himself as much as I do, and I want to make him happy. Also, he has asked for this help, so my "teaching" is not unsolicited.
TL;DR: | American girl visiting China for first time. Has anyone else experienced this situation? | American girl studying Chinese language at school in China. Is it worth trying to go all the way? Also, what advice do you have for a Chinese boy when it comes to sex/relationships? | American girl studying abroad with a Chinese boy. Need advice on how to help him be more open and have a little more fun. Also, is it wrong for me to try this? How can I do this? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by making fun of my co-workers dead baby.
POST: I won't make this too long but basically at my job we all like to fuck with each other a lot. I have two co workers named Chris and Jeff who have pregnant girlfriends.
We were on the conversation of sex and I said to Chris "Ha you can't fuck your girl cause she's pregnant." (yes I know you can still fuck your girlfriend if she's pregnant. It was a joke)
Then I saw the other Jeff the same thing only this time Chris was behind me giving the hand-across-the-neck shut the fuck up signal but it was too late. He just looked at me heartbroken and said, "She lost the baby." And then walked away.
I didn't know what to say at that point so I just walked the opposite direction. Later on I went up to him and just told him how sorry I was and I had no idea. He assumed that everyone else had told me, but he wasn't too upset with me. It could have went a lot worse I guess.
TL;DR: | Made fun of co-workers who lost their baby in a game of sex. | made a joke about how dead the baby was (was she still having sex? was she just miscarried?) and got an answer of "she lost the baby" | Made fun of my co-workers pregnant girlfriends baby. TIFU when they got upset. Didn't see it coming. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Is she [21] playing hard to get or uninterested in me?[22/M]
POST: Hey guys first post here. So I'll try to make this quick, I've been out of the dating scene for a few years now and need advice with a girl i currently like.
Her and I met in class and have been talking for not too long a month or so. We have tons in common I have gotten her number and we text every now and then (more on that later.) But I have really I've made the most progress in the past week. So everything explained further takes place in a span of a week.
I've hung out with her a few times. The times we have hung out have been good we seem to hit it off. She's kinda touchy and takes lots of pictures of us (bff on sc if that means anything.) She said things like I'm special for getting to see her act in her goofy way. She even made and brought me a sandwich for when we were studying together. But ever since then she seems less interested in me and we do not text as often. Which is weird cuz that was to me at least the time we hit it off the most. Before We had been texting all day but now barely at all and remember this is all in a span of less than a week.
Most recently we were supposed to hangout but she said she forgot (which is a big red flag I know) but we did reschedule for another specific day.
So is she uninterested? Playing hard to get? Or other?
TL;DR: | Told me she's interested in me, but she likes me more than I care to tell her. Is she uninterested? | She talks to me a lot and I think i've made some progress but everything seems to have stopped. | Got her number, hung out a few times, but now she seems less interested and we do not text as often. Need advice. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: None of my business? Boyfriend of two years has decided to build a house and hasn't asked me for any input. (F27)(M28)
POST: I'm feeling really hurt.
My boyfriend (M28) and I (F27) have been in a serious relationship for two years. Everything's been wonderful and I'm very happy. However, we're still not living together because he's "not ready yet."
There's really no reason why we can't live together. We both make great money, have little to no debt and our jobs are in the same area. But he says he's not ready.
He informed me last week that he's going to build a house and is going to look at land with a realtor next week. WTF!? He didn't discuss any of this with me or ask for any of my input. There's nothing wrong with the house he's living in right now. I don't understand.
After two serious years together, don't you think a girlfriend should have some kind of input if you're planning on building a future with her?
Is this any of my business?
TL;DR: | Boyfriend of two years is going to build a house and isn't ready to give me any input. | boyfriend doesn't seem to trust me and wants to build a house and I'm feeling hurt. What do? | My boyfriend's going to build a house and is going to look at land with a real estate agent. He didn't ask me for any input. Is this any of my business? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [24M] tried to remain friends with ex-girlfriend [22F]. Her new boyfriend [21M] has insisted she stop talking to me.
POST: Broke up with my girlfriend earlier this year around February because we didn't feel like things were working out (1.5 years together). I was in a bad state and wasn't sure if I wanted to take the relationship any further. That said she is a fantastic person and I wanted to remain friends with her, so we have up until recently.
Around 2-3 months ago she stated getting serious with another guy and he hates the idea of her having anything to do with me. He insisted she stop talking to me, she said no at first and we met occasionally for coffee, talked on Facebook etc etc. He got really upset about it though and we agreed to scale things back a bit and only meet occasionally, every 2-3 weeks or so.
Recently I get a message from her saying "She doesn't want to talk to you!". After meeting with her again it turns out that he has been checking her phone and making her feel guilty about talking to me. He has also hijacked her phone and blocked me on Facebook/Snapchat several times and has done this for another male friend of hers too.
I realise that as the ex-boyfriend he may see me as a threat but this whole thing is really bumming me out. She is a great person and a great friend, I can't help but feel like this new guy is trying to control her life a bit too much.
I don't know what to do, I want to stay friends with her, but I can't so much as drop her a message without her new boyfriend having a melt down. I offered to talk with him to explain I mean no harm, but he refuses to talk to me.
TL;DR: | My ex-gf told me she stopped talking to me in February (a month ago), which is causing a massive ruckus in our relationship. Should I break up with him?
EDIT: I have a message for him saying he is trying to control her. He said he thinks she is an immature jerk, if she is an immature jerk she will make him angry. He has been checking his phone several times. He's overreacting. | Bf of ex girlfriend is controlling and is using my ex-girlfriend to try and control her life. I want to stay friends with her, but feel like he is too controlling. | Ex-girlfriend has new boyfriend insisting she doesn't want to talk to me, has blocked me on Facebook and made her feel guilty about me talking to her. She also has new boyfriend making her feel guilty. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Parents will probably be against my[25f] relationship with my boyfriend[26M]
POST: My boyfriend and I have been in a relationship for nearly 2 years and last year it turned into a long distance relationship. Meanwhile we have come to the conclusion, that we want to live in the same country and move in together.
My family expects me to get married in order to live with my boyfriend. My boyfriend and I, we are both okay with that.
The problem is, that my parents don't know about him yet. I have never told them because I was pretty sure, that they won't accept him for one specific reason.
And I am so sure, as I hear how they talk about other couples, that shouldn't be together in their opinion and in general am aware of their point of view on these matters.
Actually there is a very small chance, that they might be okay with him because only his mother has a different cultural background and at the same time there is still a big chance, that they might be against him.
This means telling them about him will probably cause a conflict. The mood in the house will drop because of me, there will be disussions because of me, very dramatic and emotional discussions, everybody will be devestated because of me... All in all everything will feel dark and cold the following days. This scenario took place once in my lifetime because of a similar topic.
For this reason I am really afraid to tell them. But that is, what I want to do tomorrow or the day after. I really want to speak to them about him. What I am hoping for is to get some advice on how to handle this conversation, some motivational stories with happy endings, speeches about how I will regret not to tell and so on... I really need that right now :(
Some side notes:
I won't talk about marriage to my parents. That would be too much in the beginning:) I'll just mention, that I have a boyfriend and hope they'll accept it one day. Of course I will remain calm throughout the conversation. That is very important, I think.
My boyfriend knows about these issues and he understands me. I wanted him to know because otherwise it would not be fair to him. Luckily he has always been very patient.
TL;DR: | Don't know if I'm ok with my parents having doubts about my relationship, but don't have a clear view on the issues. | My parents will probably be against me getting in a relationship with my boyfriend because of his family. I need advice on how to approach this conversation, especially considering the fact that I want to tell them about him eventually. | parents will be against my relationship with my boyfriend, but I don't know how to tell them about him |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Black people. Help me understand you.
POST: Don't read if you think this is a troll or angry statement because it's not, it's a genuine statement.
Please. I have tried many times to understand why black people feel so entitled because of tragic acts that happened hundreds of years ago. (Since when were black people the only slaves?) Every SINGLE black man/woman I've met, has this particular attitude amongst them: Blacks need to ALWAYS stick together, every other race hates them, every other race is going out of their way to oppress them. I see white people especially trying to embrace blacks and show them that they are equal, but then it is met by "Oh you're just doing it to show you're not racist, but you are." I turn on TV, blacks are in MANY commercials and ad campaigns that were created by whites. I see blacks in commercials and ad campaigns that were created by blacks, no whites there. When are black people going to be satisfied with our country and it's efforts embrace blacks? If the answer is never, what are you doing to make it a real goal?
TL;DR: | I have a hard time understanding why black people feel so entitled because of past racist acts. | If you have never heard the word "entitled" try a simple search on the internet. I can't say it enough. | We have been treated with such hate for so long, I want to see this change.
Thanks for any advice! |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Sometimes I(21F) think my bf(24M) chooses games over me...
POST: ...and it is really starting to upset me. We've been dating for a while, I knew he was a gamer and that was part of the appeal. But I'm finding it more and more annoying when he ignores me to talk to people he's never met. I'm right here, in flesh and blood, trying to talk about my day or my problems or wanting some sexy times and he'll ignore me. For example, I just wanted to share a sexy shower but he's "too busy teaching this new girl how to play." We're apart most of the day, always busy. I get that when he gets home he wants to relax, but I'm always home 3 hours after him. I feel like asking a few minutes to just "us" isn't too much to ask, is it?
TL;DR: | I (21F) think my bf (24M) doesn't listen on anything and doesn't bother to chat to new people for sex. Do I ask him for sex or not? | I can only ask for 2 hours of alone time a week because my boyfriend chooses games over me. | bf ignores me in the day to day, sometimes I think he ignores me just because he's into games instead of me. |
SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: I though the date went well, she didn't.
POST: I [24M] met a nice girl [22F] on Tinder last week, though I don't hold much stock in Tinder. I got her number and we texted all week, and we seemed to get a long very well. So We decided to meet for drinks on Friday, it just so happened to be my birthday too. I haven't been on a date like this in a while so I was nervous but I do well under pressure. I felt like it went well, but of course, I expect first dates to be a little shaky which is normal I think. I kept things light, I didn't talk about serious personal stuff and kept it short, about 2 hours. We left, walked her to her car, a little "nice to meet you" hug, and just your basic talk to you later kind of goodbye.
This morning, asked her how she though it went and was told it was bad. Apparently it was some things I said. Of course, she didn't tell me what those things were and stopped texting me and unmatched me on Tinder. There's not much point in trying to remember all the things I said, but shit...I would like to know. I guess I'm just upset because she just slammed the door on me.
Anybody else deal with this? Any ideas? Im not trying to fix anything, I just want to learn from my mistakes.
TL;DR: | Met a girl on Tinder, it was bad, but I said it was good, she didn't. I guess I'm just upset because she bumbled around, and tried to get me to stop. | met a girl, everything seemed to go well, but she ended the date bad and now I'm upset about it. What should I do? | went on a first date and got dumped. Didn't tell me what I did wrong, she just stopped all contact. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: is it possible to get in trouble for telling someone to die in a fire?
POST: long story short some dick sold me a fake Pokemon game on play.com. I emailed him calling him a douche for distributing fakes and said die in a fire. I left a review on his seller profile saying I received a fake game.
he emails me saying I threatened to burn his house down (?????) and that if I did not say sorry and removed my feedback then he would contact the police because I threatened him apparently.
a few emails of me telling him to leave me alone he threatens to send the police to my house tomorrow (he got the address from mailing me the fake game) and says the same usual shit and tries to blackmail me to remove the review or, again, threatens to get the police involved.
TL;DR: | I told him the fake game. He emails me to remove my review. He threatens to give me the fake game. I tell him his name. He threatens to kill me. He writes a note saying he will contact the police on my behalf. | I told someone to die in a fire so he would stop harassing me. he threatens to send the police to my house. is this legal/illegal? | dick sold me a fake game. said to die in a fire. I threatened to burn his house down. I told him off. He threatens to get the police involved. What do I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Should I (M19) drop this girl (F20)...?
POST: Hello,
This girl I met has been hitting on me for a while and I'm interested. However, today she said something that really bothered me. I told her I can't really cook and have much to learn and she asked me in a b**chy way how am I supposed to impress a woman if I can't cook.... I told her I was joking ( I can cook but have limited knowledge.) but it was just so...direct and rude. She replied a little cold after that and I just ignored her... She's told me she can't do some things well and I never asked "How do you expect to impress a man?" Not everyone knows everything, and plus she told me she's a bad cook...(lol)
Just a little amazed she could be so rude...but what do you guys think? She's really cool, smart and I can talk to her like a bro but I feel like that attitude she displayed today while texting seems to foreshadow some "drastic" situations.
TL;DR: | girl says I should drop my crush in front of her (which she didn't respond to), but I have no idea what to do about it. | girl hit on me for a while, told me I'm not good enough for her. She said she can't cook so I got mad. She got mad when I told her I can't cook. She got really cold. | Girl I like seems to have some attitude issues when texting and I'm not sure if I should break up with her. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: BF [23 M] broke up with me [22 F] after two years together, it was somewhat mutual
POST: This happened yesterday, and we're both still in love with each other. We both love each other so deeply, but are at different stages in life. (he's finishing up college, I graduated in May)
We were in a weird phase where I was commuting to work a shitty job and staying with him for half the week, and then commuting back home and living home for half the week. He's already decided that long distance would be too hard since he's finishing up his senior year.
Idk it's just so hard.. and I could tell it was so hard for him too. Neither of us want to break up, but it's the best thing for right now. He said he doesn't want to close the door on having me in his life, but it seems unfair to string me along like that. I'm just so confused and in need off some advice.
TL;DR: | BF and I are still in love, both want to break up, but he's already decided that long distance would be too hard. | He broke up with me, and I'm so confused about the whole situation. I don't want to lose him, but I don't want to ruin our friendship, and I'm in so much pain. I'm just not sure if it is going to get better or not. I don't want to ruin our friendship. | BF broke up with me, but I don't want to break up. We're both in love with each other and it's been two years. How do I move on from this? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Hey Reddit, I've got very severe lower back/sciatic nerve pain. Any tips/tricks/help from fellow redditors?
POST: So here's basically what's going on:
I hurt my back about 4 weeks ago by carrying around 50 pounds in a messenger bag slung sideways over my shoulder. I am having very severe and crippling pain which has moved almost 90% from my lower back down into my buttocks/hamstrings. I am going to a chiropractor three times per week and doing physical therapy there and I'm also being hooked up to a muscle stimulus machine (electrode device).
I am in constant pain and can't move/sleep/stand for more than fifteen minutes at a time. I can't bend down, lay down, bend sideways, anything. Nothing I have done has eased the pain in nearly 4 weeks. I'm driving my girlfriend nuts and I feel quite helpless. I haven't been out of the house but only five times (minus the chiropractor visits) in the past four weeks.I also start back to University on Monday and I have absolutely no clue how thats going to go down.
Has anyone else here suffered with this? My mother had sciatica and her episode lasted for nearly three months. There's no way I can endure this for another 8 weeks.
Here's what I've done so far: ice, Advil, physical therapy, rest, pillows under legs and back while resting and laying down. tonight I am trying to sleep in a recliner which perhaps seems to be helping a tiny bit.
TL;DR: | I have sciatica and pain in my lower back, and I have no idea how to get it under my feet/back. | severe lower back/sciatic nerve pain, constant pain. Anyone have any similar stories, tips/tricks/help? | I've been in constant/unrelieveable pain for four weeks. I'm going to see a doctor today and am hoping that I can get some sort of a handle on this. Has anyone here had to deal with this? What have you done? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My twin brother (24M) just came out of the closet and I'm worried about my parents (m&f50s)
POST: Sorry if the formatting is weird I am submitting through mobile.
As the title describes my brother is an out bisexual now.
A little background:
we come from a Hispanic Catholic family
My parents are very traditional
My twin brother likes men and women
He has a boyfriend of 9ish months.
We have never had problems as a family before. In fact everything has been as smooth as ever before tonight. But we all felt it was time that my parents knew. So my older brother, his wife, my twin and myself sat them down after dinner and told them. It crushed my mom. I haven't seen her this upset since her father passed away. She is scaring me because she has had health problems in the past. And I am not mentally prepared to call an ambulance to come help her if she starts hyperventilating out of control
I don't know how to help. I feel pretty useless and my twin seems to be blaming himself.
Our older sibling was here when the outing happen but he lives on the other side of town. So after the outing happen and my parents returned to their room my older brother and his wife went home.
Now I am sitting on the couch with my mom as she cries her eyes out and I don't know how to help.
TL;DR: | My twin brother just came out of the closet and I don't know how to help my mom. | My parents got a call to attend to their loved ones after outing them with bisexual bf. My mom is upset and crying. Not sure how to help. | My twin brother came out and I'm worried about my parents, my mom and my brother. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [27 M] with my [23 F] on/off gf of 1 year. I need to break up but my head and heart are conflicted.
POST: I'll keep this brief. There are a lot of issues in the relationship. Big issues that arent going to resolve anytime soon, and are deal-breakers for me in the long-run. I realized not long ago that I need to let this relationship go.
That said, she moved a long way to be with me, and we have a lease together. She still believes in the relationship. Supposedly. I'm not sure how long we can go with almost no-affection either way before she stops believing in it.
I'm the only one paying rent and for most things, so I dont want to just leave her homeless. I still do love her, and wish well for her, but I know I cant give her what she needs, and she cant give me what I need.
And I feel like an asshole to be turning my back on our shared experiences together.
So...please help give me the courage to do what I know I need to.
TL;DR: | I need to break up but my head and heart are conflicted. | On/off gf of 1 year with rent, lease, and a relationship that isnt great in the most ideal circumstances. Need to break up, but cant give her all of my love. Need courage and advice to move on. | I need to break up with my GF of 1 year, but my head and heart are conflicted. How do I do this without doing myself some long-term damage? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Being forced to be Catholic...what to do?
POST: About two or three months ago, my mom divorced my dad and he moved out. The relationship had been bad for many years, so no suprise there (sadness, but no suprise). A coupla weeks later, her boyfriend, who she had been "just friends" with when she was still married to my dad, moved in.
He is a devout Catholic, has been going to Mass every day for fortysomething years. Ever since he moved in, she's been going with him. Now, I have school, so I can't go every day, but she still insists that I go every weekend and go through all the rituals and shit, including getting a blessing from the priest EVERY SINGLE TIME. In addition to that, she signs me up for all kinds of Catholic clubs and activities without asking me, to the point I'm spending much more time at the parish than desirable.
Normally, I'm a go-along-to-get-along guy, but this is beginning to get on my nerves. I'm not really sure I'm an atheist, but I've never really bought this whole Christianity thing either, I've just pretended to believe in it to keep my parents from coming down on my like a shit-ton of bricks.
So reddit, should I tell her I'm sick of this shit? Or should I keep putting up with it until I can move out?
TL;DR: | My mom moved out, and now my boyfriend has to be Catholic. I'm not sure if it's okay for me to remain on the Catholic side if my mom is being irrational. | I'm being forced to be Catholic, and I'm not sure whether or not I'm an atheist. Is there anything else I can do to get out of this? | Mom's boyfriend is Catholic, I'm not, she's forcing me to be. I'm not a fan of the whole thing, and it's starting to get on my nerves. Should I tell her? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Stalker emails me, claims to be local, gives a crazy story, and then dies???
POST: Okay maybe this should be in WTF... I really just want some input or advice here.
A while ago I got an email from a guy. Long story short he claimed to be a part of a secret organization and is a master hacker. He knew my class schedule and would give details about when I traveled where, and where he would watch me from. He ripped pics from my facebook (which I keep private) and made creepy wallpapers with them. He was using a fake name which had a few other webpages linked to them. One of which was a foot fetish blog which he immediately deleted.
He tells me I am so beautiful and that he loves me and dreams of me all the time. He called me his princess and claimed he loves me more than anyone ever could. He said I was the only one for him and he would be my slave.
Anyway, I suspect he is a teacher of mine and I straight up tell him so. (I'm pretty naive ok?) He then tells me all this stuff about his identity that is VERY similar to the person I suspect except for a few changed details. He gives a TON of information about the teacher I suspect that he claims he got from the teachers 'file' by his expert hacking skills. He gives me a name with the same initials that I cannot connect to anything (another fake name?).
Suddenly he says he is leaving the country and hitching an illegal ride on a ship out of Seattle. He claimed he could not live life seeing me be in love with someone else and that he hates everything about his life. I really just wanted this guy to leave me alone so I am like, whatever.
Recently I got an email from a 'friend of his' that supposedly helped him get a ride on a ship. She claimed that he died of a heart attack (this guy was also supposed to be 30 years old) and left me a note that said he hopes to meet me in heaven.
So reddit, WTF?
TL;DR: | A guy is claiming to be a part of a secret organization, claims his job it was to help my parents get a job, and then dies. I believe he is a teacher of mine and I suspect he is a kid who is going down the path of his life. | Got an email from a guy saying he loved me and wanted to meet me in heaven. He claims to be a secret hacker that is coming to me.?
Any help would be greatly appreciated. I am so confused. | A guy claims to be a crazy stalker and dies of a heart attack. I find a letter in his computer from a 'friend' that claims he died and that he wants to meet me in life. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Have any of had a successful, long-term relationship that began with glances across a room?
POST: Met a potential client for coffee today in a public coffee shop. Passed a [re: gorgeous] guy putting sugar in his coffee, made eye contact, smiled, and continued to the counter to order my coffee.
Then I joined my client-to-be and proceeded to discuss business with him for 45 minutes, all the while, hot guy walked to and from his car loading food he'd had catered from the chain cafe...making eye contact with me each time he walked behind my guest. And all I could think was "damn, if only I wasn't in a meeting, I could say hi to him."
Finally, he pretended to casually "overhear" something in our conversation, joined it for about one minute, exchanged cards with both of us, and left. I got a call from him an hour later. (Note: very attractive). We've been texting back and forth all day.
What a chance meeting! I just saw him across a room. Have any of you had successful relationships that began this way?
TL;DR: | Met a potential client for coffee, made eye contact, grinned, and left. Had successful long-term relationships that began with glances across a room. | Met a guy in a coffee shop. Passed him in a public place, made eye contact, made eye contact with him. He pretended to "overhear" something in our conversation all day. | Met a guy at coffee shop - saw him across a room - texted him all day - have any of you had successful, long-term relationships that began this way? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Hey reddit, Have you been the cheater or "cheated" in a relationship?
POST: Just over a year ago I found out that my bf had cheated on me. I decided to stay with him (bad idea?) because I really do love him. However, I can't seem to let it go. I don't bring it up in fights or anything, but I do find myself getting upset over it every now and then. I have asked him why he did it, and the response I always get is, "I don't know what I was thinking." I was just wondering, as the cheater how does it make you feel if your SO won't let it go, and as the "cheated" do you still find yourself thinking about it or getting upset?
TL;DR: | How does it make you feel if your SO does not let it go, or doesn't know if it happened? | SO won't let things go in relationship, and I find myself getting upset about it sometimes. Help? | I'm a cheater; SO won't let me go. I'm wondering how other people feel when they do or don't get over it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: 16M Having troubles with some insecurities, need some advice
POST: I'm on mobile at the moment so I can't tag, but I possibly can in the morning.
I've been cheated on 3 times by 3 separate girlfriends in the past 10 months. Now I am over each one of them specifically, but it's developed some trust issues and I worry a lot now that I am in another relationship. Whenever I see my girlfriend talk to another guy (literally doesn't matter who) it bothers me, and I know there is almost no chance at all that attraction is there. I hate this, I wish it didn't bother me because I talk to other girls and it doesn't bother her. She's a competitive dancer and every once in awhile she goes on 5-6 day dance trips. I sit back in our hometown nervous as shit the entire duration wondering who's hitting on her or if anythings happening and I'll never know. I know these insecurities are stupid and I don't vocalize these things with her.
She has a little experience dating but nothing serious, and I get the good vibes she wants this to be something that lasts and she cares about me, and I feel the same way. But these insecurities are killing me and I'd really like your guys advice on this. I really like her, and really don't want to get cheated on for a fourth time.
TL;DR: | Don't know if I am being cheated on or if there is any reason to worry. | I'm a 16 year old male who has trust issues, I'm dating a girl who also has trust issues. She's been cheated on 4 times. She wants to continue dating, and I want to continue dating. I want to trust the woman I love. | Having some trust issues because of past experience and want advice on how to change these negative feelings. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My (20M) disinterest in sex is really hurting my girlfriend (19F) of 3 years
POST: My girlfriend and I started as a long distance relationship when we were in high school. We met three times over the years, each time for about a week, before moving in together during the beginning of this year. Initially, our sex life was pretty great. We had sex all the time and everything was fine. Lately, though, I've been wanting to less and less and it's really hurting her self esteem and making her feel like I'm unattracted to her.
This may get a bit graphic, I just want to let you guys know why I'm not really that into it anymore in the hopes that you'll have some kind of advice as to what I can do. So generally, when we begin having sex, it's awesome. But after about a minute or so, it's like my dick goes numb. It makes it very difficult to stay into it, even though I enjoy pleasuring her. This makes me kind of dread having sex because I know it'll just end up being me trying everything I can do to make her feel good, while I'm just kind of there wishing it'd be over. Lately, we probably only have sex about once or twice a week, which is really messing with her self esteem issues. I feel awful everytime she tries to initiate it, because I just really don't want to and I know it'll end up making her feel awful.
I have no idea what to do. I should probably just suck it up and do it for her. I've tried talking to her about it, but she takes it all so personally. Maybe it's just the way I phrase it. Are there any ways I can make myself more interested in having sex?
TL;DR: | In my relationship with my girlfriend, which has been falling apart for some reason, I'm very disenchanted with the sex life. Can we get back to being intimate now? | I'm really disinterested in sex, which makes my girlfriend feel bad about herself and it's messing with our relationship. I want to make myself interested in sex again. | I'm not that into sex anymore. What the hell, guys? |
SUBREDDIT: r/legaladvice
TITLE: Child Labor Laws: No break and 8-hour shifts.
POST: 16 year old, working at a fast food joint, around 21 hours a week for around the last 2 weeks. I live in Wyoming.
Not once, whether it be a 5 or 8 hour shift, have gotten a break. Several (3) people have told me this is highly illegal.
1. At my former job, a certain Taco supplier, was strict on getting a 30 minute break in (even if it was 15 minutes in my shift). My boss told me the state would charge 1,000$ to the restaurant if I did not receive a break. In fact she used to work under the same boss a few years back, while pregnant. She claimed it was the exact same way. I always got a break at my former job.
2. My girlfriend's father, a former owner of 5-12 (certain fried chicken restaurants) also advised that it was illegal. I would assume he knows what he's saying, but he was running business in a separate state (Colorado)
3. Lastly, my government teacher told me it was illegal as well. He runs concession stands for high-school events. The topic came up when I said the 6 hours I spent today working in the stand was nothing compared to my normal conditions.
If my boss is claiming to officials that I have received breaks when I have not, ever... how do I go about taking action against this.
While I do want to quit, I also am curious if there is anything I could do in lieu of letting it continue. This isn't new for this business, they tend to have trouble keeping people.
Also she printed off 2 copies of my SS card for "just in case the printer can't read ," it was in full color. I have no doubt she is malicious. Hoping she is too old and sweet to sell my identity.
TL;DR: | Mother-in-law's son-in-law was cruel and harsh on me as a teenager. This is a major story. | What can I do to prevent being screwed over for a few hours work? | I have given my boss a break, she is claiming this is illegal. I have no idea what to do. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [F/21] feel like I really don't care about most people and I want to change that
POST: I care about people in general, but when it comes down to individuals, I get so bored and annoyed with other people's lives. Most people don't genuinely care about how their cashier's day is going when they ask, but I feel like that about everybody, including my best friends.
When my friends tell me stuff about their lives, it's all I can do to concentrate enough that I can respond appropriately. This makes me feel really narcissistic and just like a terrible friend in general, but I just can't bring myself to actually care about why somebody broke up with their SO or where they're going for spring break.
Since sharing stuff like that is a big part of friendship, I feel like I'm not actually friends with any of my friends. I've been sharing less and less with them too, as I wonder if my friends are thinking the same thing when I talk. The only person who I think I genuinely care about is my boyfriend. And now I'm worried that that care will fade and our relationship will end because of my apparent narcissism.
Anybody ever felt like this?
TL;DR: | I'm not in a position to ask for help getting my friends and family on the same page, and I don't know how to bring up the point that friendship is a big part of friendship. | I feel like I'm not a good friend to most people because I don't really care about what they're going through. But I want to change that by sharing more with them. | I don't care about most people and I'm worried that this will ruin our relationship. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Reddit, do you think you're able to confront yourself and admit your insecurities?
POST: Recently my cousin came to me with a proposition. He told me that I was living a facade because I was afraid of judgement. He told me I was hiding. Then he challenged me to a year of accountability with myself. Step one? Publicly admitting the things about myself that I've been running from. Facing them head on and letting the world know so the people in my life can help me grow. So I told those close to me and then I posted it publicly on Facebook. Surprisingly I received an alarming number of people who then did the same in return, they shared everything with me. So I thought I would ask the amazing people of reddit if they would like to join me on this journey of accountability. Do you want to face yourself and admit those things about yourself that scare you? I'll post mine in the comments as well.
TL;DR: | Found out cousin's self-accreacting, need help getting rid of some of the doubts in my life, and have some amazing responses. | My cousin challenged me to publicly admit my insecurities. I shared my list with the world. Reddit, would you like to join me on my year of accountability to confront myself and admit those things about myself that scare you. | I'm asking you to share your public face and tell me the things you're afraid to face about yourself so I can face those things. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I'll (24/M) will probably lose touch with my father (45/M) if we ever decide to move to separate places.
POST: So my relationship with my father is a strained one with a long history of arguments, hurt feelings, neglect and guilt.
Growing up lets just say he was a less than attentive father and I came to terms with it fairly quickly in life. My mother and father have been separated since I can remember and both were very young when they had me.
Without going in depth with my entire childhood we'll just say I never felt welcome and always felt like a huge burden in every sense to both of my parents. Living with my father it was especially hard when he chose his new wife and her daughters over me. Parties were attended, family photos were captured and trips to who-knows-where happened without me. Through this I learned independence and self-sufficiency where I kind of just accepted it and figured it wasn't worth my time to yearn for attention. However, Recently we've found a lull in or out bursts and have been really calm. Lately we've been trying to have conversations about whatever nonsense comes up and small talk here and there. For god sakes we teamed up the other day to change all four rotors on my car so that I could be done before nightfall. It's been an interesting last 10 months...
I'm completely able to be on my own and financially stable, but I just haven't decided to up and desert the man yet. Maybe its my ENTJ nature where I cut losses and move on but I can feel that my father and I will not have a strong enough bond after we move on to pretend to be related.
I think I've accepted this already and it's a shame. Knowing that for years I'll probably forget about him and even worse is that maybe when I have grandkids that they'll probably never meet grandpa.
TL;DR: | I won't see my dad anymore and will probably lose touch with my father despite him moving on. | Will probably lose touch with father once we move to separate places due to strained relationship. Don't know when or how to react. Any input would be appreciated. | Dad's a jerk and I'm tired of being so. I'm not sure if I will ever move on and forget his face. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [27 M] have "almost arguments" with my wife [28 F] about cleanliness of things and related topics. Reddit, am I just a slob, or is she being unreasonable or (medically) OCD? Looking for opinions.
POST: So we've been married for quite a while, and get along famously on nearly everything. Except for one category, and that's the general sanitation level of things.
We both like to keep an orderly house, but specifically I mean things like sitting on a bed after having worn pants outside and sat down places. One time she acted like I was crazy for putting some jeans I had worn a few times (just out and about) back into a dresser drawer that I use for gym shorts and mostly clean things.
It's this among other things, with more examples I can give if necessary. The reason this bugs me from a relationships point of view is that while so far I've tried to just be glad that she's clean and tidy instead of falling to the other side of things and picking my battles elsewhere, this wears on me when through shock and surprise she kind of makes me feel like I was raised in a barn.
I am truly not sure whether I am in the wrong or is she on some of these things though. I don't possess the exact biological knowledge to say whether there's is reason or rhyme to this type of thing, but in general I just don't stress over the bottom of a piece of luggage that truly makes me wrong for putting it on the bed. I don't know. Or if it's normal to feel the need to run a bleach only cycle to "clean out" the washing machine after a load of soiled laundry went through previously.
TL;DR: | wife is a messy slob, not sure if she's being unreasonable. | Wife is an OCD, and I don't know whether the occasional bit of OCD is just a normal thing to have or if it's unhealthy. Am I over reacting when I don't like it? | Wife doesn't clean up after herself. Do I have a right to be hurt by this or am I an unreasonable person? |
SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: Me [21F] with [22M]. Can't tell if he's messing with me or just really weird/shy?
POST: I've had a crush on this guy from my gym for the past 2 years. Long story short, I found out he was interested in me back in May and we started texting.
We always planned to meet at the gym at the same time. He actually seemed pretty shy because he would never say hi to me at the gym first. I'd always have to approach him first, but we'd have decent conversation, and he'd always hug me goodbye. We went on our first date after 2 weeks of texting & meeting up at the gym, and the date went really well, but he just stopped talking to me for no reason after this. He just ignored me at the gym and stopped responding to texts.
Two weeks ago, we match on Tinder and I message him on there. He tells me to text him and we talk for like two days, then he disappears again.
Two days ago, he randomly texted me and said "I wanted to talk to you at the gym, but you're always talking to other people." I asked him to just come up and talk to me, and he goes "Idk why I do or don't do things. I'm weird and just really shy." Then he send me a shirtless pic of himself.
I saw him at the gym yesterday, we talked, and he gave me a hug before I left. I texted him today and he responded, but when I invited him to go out with me and my friends tonight, he just never replied. I don't get if he's just fucking with me or what.
TL;DR: | I'm dating this guy, he just stopped me. He told me to text him on there but I don't get if he's just fucking with me. | I've been crushing on this guy for 2 years. We've talked, talked, talked and he'll talk to me for hours before he'll talk to me again. He'll talk to me for days before he texts me back. He's weird and I'm confused. | I'm just really confused about how to handle this situation. I feel like I'm being played. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [26 M] am uncomfortable with my girlfriend's [25F] Facebook pictures that include her ex. Is it fair ask her to take them down?
POST: To provide more color, I find it uncomfortable when I randomly click on my girlfriend's Facebook pictures, because her ex is in about half of them. What makes it extra weird is that I knew the guy/was kind of friends with him at one point in time while the two of them were dating. Additionally, the two of them were together for 5 years.
Admittedly, I am a pretty insecure dude, and when I see the pictures I imagine how they were together, and if she said the same things to him she said to me, if they did the same things together that we do, how their sex was, if their sex was better than ours, etc. So I suppose the pictures just trigger all of that.
We don't have any recent pictures of each other on Facebook either. I am fine with this, and that doesn't need to change. However, the most recent pictures she has is of this person with whom she was with for 5 years. So with both of those things in conjunction with one another, it makes me feel weird and kind of sad.
For the record, I always untag myself from pictures with any of my exes. I treat these pictures as my memories, my history, and in the past. Keeping the pictures on Facebook keeps the memories in the present.
TL;DR: | My girlfriend's Facebook pictures include her ex who I see occasionally on her facebook. Is it fair to assume my girlfriend will remove these pictures while in the future? | When is it a good time to drop pictures of your girlfriend's ex? If she says "I'm not gonna do that, dude." is that a bad idea, and/or would that hurt the relationship the most when the relationship already is not good or does it not change anything? | Am uncomfortable with my girlfriend's Facebook pictures that include her ex, is it fair to ask her to take them down? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I(21f) feel like I'm unreasonably upset about something my (m21) did last night.
POST: Last night I left the bar early with my friends because I was tired and bored. My boyfriend was there and had planned on leaving too and watching a movie with me. But he forgot about this when his friends told him they were coming to the bar we were at. He said he would stay only about 15 minutes then leave.
Well he ended up staying more than an hour and a half. A little after two My bf texts me "I should just come over and crash at your place". Guys can't sleep over in my sorority house and he knows this. So I decide I'll just meet up with him and we can get a bus to his place. I call and call and he doesnt answer so I just head over, I sleep at his place 99% of the time anyway. By the time I get outside his place I'm worried because he hasnt responded in over half an hour and we were in the middle of making plans. So I get there and hes in his bedroom alone with a girl friend, that he knows I don't like. I don't like her because the first time he introduced me to her she just brushed me off and barely said hi before turning and walking away. And she just gives off this vibe that she thinks shes hot shit and she is always drunk.
My bf apologized for not telling me she was coming to his place. He said that she just wanted to hang out longer, she doesn't go here so they rarely see each other. And he also explained his phone was charging when I'd been calling. I now know they didnt do anything and I'm mad over nothing but I still feel upset and don't know how to get over it.
TL;DR: | I'm mad as fuck over something I did last night. I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm letting my shit pile up there. | bf of 2.5 years introduced me to a girl friend who he knows I don't like. He said she just wanted to hang out with me longer. My boyfriend didn't inform me of this girl's presence until an hour and a half into the night. | bf didn't tell me his girlfriend was coming to his place, and I feel like a bitch for being upset. |
SUBREDDIT: r/Pets
TITLE: My sister's dog was picked up by animal control, $150 to get him out and she can't afford it. He'll be euthanized in 2 days if she doesn't pay up.
POST: My sister has had this dog for the longest time, he's been shuffled around our family from time to time when she couldn't keep him due to being a renter. I had him for a year and had to give him back to her because I moved into a smaller place. I told her to keep him until the end of this year and I would take him back but he managed to get out of his yard today and got locked up by animal control it's going to cost her $150 to get him out or he'll be put to sleep! He's about 11 years old, the sweetest beagle in the world! He doesn't bark he's great with kids and he's just a bug ol teddy bear! I don't know what to do!! I can't let him be put to sleep but I can't afford to help her! :-(
[Brody] That's him.
TL;DR: | My sister's dog is picked up by animal control and I'm not sure how to handle it. I'll have to help her with the expenses. | Sister's dog is being euthanized, $150 to get him out. He's going to die after two days if he doesn't pay. | Sister's dog is locked up and going to be put to sleep and I don't have the money to help her. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [18/m] My friend's (18/f) boyfired (21/m) mite be 'covert emotional manipulating her' what do I do?
POST: Okay so My friend lets call her Stacey. Stacey's boyfriend doesn't like her hanging out with her friends cause he gets jealous, and won't talk her to days if she does this. She missed important events like her sisters 21 birthday cause he didn't want her to go and get dressed up. They talk constantly together, and if she answers late then he will get mad and ignore her. Yet he will ignore her for long periods of time, and not answer right away and get mad if she confronts him about it. She's depressed and she told me, that he has so much power over her that if he is mad at her then Stacey feels like shit. She normally doesn't cry much, but now she crys all the time has anxiety, etc. And now he doesn't want her to go to this 'thing' that is super important to her, and she doesn't know what to do.
I don't know what I should do about this, should I tell her that I think he is emotionally manipulating her? I'm kinda awkward and I never know how to handle these situation...Especially when it involves relationships (never had one). I tried telling her the other day, but it just came out awkward...and I don't think she got what I mean... I normally have the philosophy 'live and let live', so I don't do anything about it cause it's their life.....but....Stacey is important to me, and I don't like her being in so much pain....she even bought tickets to travel to him (long distance relationship)
TL;DR: | My friend is mite obsessed and won't stop being madly jealous of her friends, even with the stress of the relationship. I need help. | A guy friend of mine doesn't want his girlfriend to see his girlfriend's (my friend's) girlfriend and now she gets nervous and sad.
**EDIT:** I really like this friend of mine and she is really cool.
EDIT 2: I don't know what else to do. She is a really cool friend. She is really nice. She is really great. But she got a 'friend' that is emotionally manipulating my friend. | Friend's boyfriend is emotionally manipulating her, and I don't know what I should do about it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: Went on a date with a girl, felt like we hit it off. Now she tells me she's seeing someone.
POST: I met a girl at my old job and I felt like we connected right away. She went on vacation and I transferred to another office in town. When she came back from her vacation she added me on Facebook and started messaging me. We started talking back and forth for a bit to the point where I felt comfortable asking her out.
She said yes so we went out for a couple beers and ended up talking for almost 5 hours. I had an amazing time talking with this person, I felt like we really hit it off and picked up right where we left off at work. When we were done I payed the tab and drove her home.
The next day I texted her saying I had a great time and wanted to know if we could go out again the following weekend. I didn't hear from her for almost a week (which is understandable, life happens) but when I did hear from her she said she, "...had a great time too but I am already seeing someone."
I'm a bit confused, but I suppose it's my fault for assuming she was single in the first place.
Basically, I would like some advice on how to respond. I do like this person, but I don't want to create an awkward situation. *I've never really been in this situation before and would like to respond respectfully and move on.
TL;DR: | Met a girl at my old job, felt like we hit it off, now she told me she's seeing someone, wondering if I should end things. | Went on a date with a girl, we hit it off. Now she says she is seeing someone. How can I respond respectfully to this situation?** | Met a girl at work, hit it off, she told me she was seeing someone, I feel like we have a connection, but she said she was seeing someone already. Now I don't know how to respond. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I am covering for my friend's affair and hate it
POST: I (28/f) have been friends with...let's call her Heidi (32/f)...for about a year. She is from Germany but has been married to an American man for about 5 years. She's absolutely miserable in her marriage but relies on her husband financially and also to stay here in the US. He's a strange guy but I like him and don't want to see him hurt. Heidi recently met a man who she is smitten with and has started up an affair with him. She has been using me as a "cover up" and tells her husband she is out with me when she is really out with the new guy. Her husband doesn't think twice because I'm a nice girl and he really trusts me. I can certainly see both sides of the story here since I've been in miserable relationships, though I prefer being honest with your partner. I know she can't really leave her husband easily because of her circumstances, but I hate being the person to cover for her. She seems incredibly happy, almost like a different person. I feel that she will be found out and I will end up being a bad guy in all this. She doesn't have a lot of other friends to cover for her either if she carries on with this. Does anyone have any advice for me?
TL;DR: | Ex-fiancé and married to a guy I'm in a marriage with is trying to break up due to finances. Now she's trying to find a way to break this off. | I'm covering for my friend's affair because she is miserable in her marriage and doesn't have many friends. I don't want to be that guy. | Friend (28/f) is using me as a "cover up" for her infidelity and doesn't like it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Neighbor (12M) asked husband (33M) if he was gay during "Take Your Son To Work Day". Help me (30F) delicately approach this...
POST: My husband and I (33M and 30F) have an awesome relationship with our downstairs neighbors. Two awesome boys in a single-mom household. Mom is great. My husband and I are sort've "the cool neighbors" that offer advice, help with homework, celebrate good grades with pizzas, etc. I pay our neighbor (12M) to take care of my dog before and after school. I travel quite a bit for work, and this arrangement helps us out quite a bit. In short - we have helped build a nice community.
Today, my husband took our neighbor (I'll call him J) as his "son" to "Take Your Son to Work Day." While he introduced J to his group of work associates, J said something like, "I'm no homo." The group laughed, but husband was a little taken aback. It kind've embarrassed him.
Later in the afternoon, J asked my husband if he was gay. My husband told him no. My husband came home pretty irritated at J because he asked him this question.
I think that J was just trying to be "cool" in front of a group of grown-ups, but I don't know where the "are you gay"? question comes in. I feel comfortable talking to J about what happened today, but I was wondering how to bring it up. Husband is planning on taking J with him to a rugby tournament, and I don't want this sort've "cool putdown" behavior to continue. I know that this would be better "man talk" between J and husband, but I think that J may feel less self-conscious if I talked to him.
I am open to any advice - Thanks!
TL;DR: | Neighbor asked husband whether he was gay. Husband was taken aback. | Neighbor asked my husband if he was gay, husband responded no. How to approach this? | Neighbor (12M) asked husband (33M) if he was gay during "Take Your Son To Work Day". Husband was a little taken aback. I'm not sure how to approach this situation. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: How do I explain my innocent situation that doesn't look innocent
POST: hello I have found myself in a bit of a pickle. A couple months ago I found myself talking to a girl who is a camwhore on a website. she tells me she's never done it and wants to give me a free show. I respectfully decline cause I have a girlfriend but i continue talking to this camwhore cause I'm honestly curious what her life is like in that buisness. I am nothing but proffesional with her. one day I end up letting her text me. But since then all she does is text me asking me to come watch her. I've bitched her out for this a few times. two nights ago she texted me and started a normal convo then said "so...you wanna have some fun? ;)" and I said no thanks. then yesterday I find out that My girlfriend went through my texts and saw that last exchange and wants to talk to me when she gets off of work in 3 hours. I have no idea what to tell her cause I highly doubt she will buy this. what should I say???
TL;DR: | just told a camwashing girl I have nothing but love for her and am curious if anyone has any advice for me. | girl wants to have sex with me cause of a video she made on the internet. I am not interested but she is. what do i say to her that won't sound too bad? | talked to a camwhore, gf found out she is a cam whore and wants to talk to me when she's off work in 3 hours. |
SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: I was looking through my phone contacts when I rediscovered a girl's phone number whom I started to hit it off with. What should I do? (More info inside)
POST: Okay so I was looking through my phone contacts when I came across this girl's phone number (let's call her Abby for the sake of logic) and I haven't talked to her in a few years. We go to the same school and I haven't really talked to her since 7th grade (both of us are now juniors in high school) and she also gave me her number in 7th grade. Fast forward to today when I'm at the dentists office, I finally see Abby and we started to hit it off a bit. I left with a warm feeling inside me because she told me how cool and nice I am (I don't get completed by girls a lot, especially popular ones {forgot to add, Abby is popular and I'm not}) and we tended to like each other. I had to leave and like a doofus I forgot to ask for her number and then while looking through my contacts I found Abby's number. Now I don't know what to do, should I text her and explain my case, should I wait until I see her again when her friends aren't around (I don't want to go up to a popular girl and make an ass of myself in front of her friends), what should I do?
TL;DR: | Found a girl's number and got it back, should I ask her out, or let the girl go? | I haven't talked to a girl in a few years but I have a crush on this girl who gave me a number a few years ago. What should I do? | found a girl's phone number while looking through contacts, hit it off a bit, don't know what to do, should I text her or wait until I see her in person? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by not taking my glasses to my friends wedding.
POST: So this happened yesterday. A friend of mine got married. I was supposed to be a groomsman in the wedding.
One of the bridesmaids got sick and couldn't be in the wedding. The photographer didn't show up either.
Perfect, Jon can take pictures.
Perfect! I didn't want to be in the wedding anyway.
I hadn't worn my glasses at all that day. Things get fairly blurry when I'm not wearing my glasses but I'm pretty use to it.
I didn't even think about it. I took all the pictures during the wedding and a bunch during the reception.
All of them were blurry as shit.
My friend and his wife weren't really upset. My friend said "Jon, you can't tell who the groom is and who the bride is",laughs.
TL;DR: | told my friend it wasn't the wedding. Had to wear glasses. Had to take them off. Makes sense to me. | I didn't take my glasses to my friend's wedding, and took all the pictures with my phone. | Didn't take my glasses to my friend's wedding. I didn't notice until the reception. I took all the photos. Everything was blurry. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by owing money.
POST: Okay, so this wasn't today, this was yesterday, so I had lost my eftpos card right on the day owed my dad twelve bucks, as you can imagine I was actively avoiding paying my dues, so I gave the car a half hearted look and didn't find it, so I went back inside to play some video games, unfortunately my dad had a better look through the car and found it, so he dragged me along to the cash machine, which wouldn't you know it wasn't working, so we went to the bank proper, which was closed, (at this point you may be asking why I didn't just use the card and the reason was that my dad had blcoked off my savings account when he set it up for me years ago and since I'm 18 in a week, it's just out of my reach) so we went to my mother's house to get some more money and we found just enough for my Dad to get his ciggerttes, headed to the dairy and bought then, and on the way out my dad crashed into someone else's brand new car.
TL;DR: | TIFU by giving dad his half hearted look of taking money from the car, but not bothering to pay his dues. | I owe my Dad a total of 12.5 bucks, he found it, I owe it to him, he blew my dad's eftpos card, I owe him another 5 bucks, I owe him a total of 17 bucks. | TIFU by Owing money and got caught by my dad, who found the money, then I crashed into people's new car, sorry for the long post, sorry for the rants, sorry for the long post, sorry for the rants. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: I [20s/f] ended a friendship. Now I'm going to have to be around my ex-friend [20s/m] and I don't know how to handle it.
POST: We were friends for a long time, and the friendship wasn't working for a lot of reasons. We were both at fault. I haven't seen him in quite a while, and now for reasons out of our control we're going to end up spending a fair amount of time together, probably for the foreseeable future.
I'm worried that being polite and friendly might lead to us trying to be friends again, which I don't think would be a good idea for either of us. On the other hand, being obviously not friendly would cause a lot of drama (others would notice and ask questions, in addition to the general drama of being not-friendly to someone), and I don't think either of us wants that.
Our friendship was really rocky and caused me a lot of emotional pain, and I've been very happy without that to worry about. Now I see myself being sucked back into that (for example, I'd like to not be posting this right now) and I don't want that to happen.
I'd like to strike a balance between "I want to be your friend again" and "I hate you" and I suspect that that is going to be very difficult, especially since my feelings are still very mixed and he has been unwilling to communicate his feelings on the subject. Any suggestions, or am I just screwed?
TL;DR: | Ended a friendship, now I'm going to have to be around my ex-friend and want to know if I should be friendly, or if being "friendly" would lead to a change in my relationship. | I [20s/f] broke up with an ex-friend. We're going to spend a lot of time together. I'm worried that being kind and polite will lead to us trying to be friends again, which I don't think would be a good idea for either of us. I'm worried that being obviously not friendly will cause drama (in addition to the general drama of being not-friendly to someone) and I don't think either of us wants that. | Ended a friendship, now have to spend time around my ex-friend, both of whom I don't want to be friends with. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Have a job offer, but not sure if I should take it... Suggestions....?
POST: So, I've been unemployed for 3 months now. I realize that this isn't that long, considering how long others have been out of work, but it's still a long time for me.
I quit my job 3 months ago, and because of it, I was denied unemployment. I left voluntarily because I was told by the president of the wee little start-up that the company was folding. I had a pending job offer for another company in another state, so I figured I was safe.
The job offer fell through, and what little savings we had left was used to get me back home to my family.
Time passed, and nothing has happened. I'm submitting my resume everywhere, and even talking to temp agencies to get me working any job at all, even if it's a 50% paycut from what I was previously making.
About 2 weeks ago, I submitted an application for an ad before realizing that it was also out of state. The ad was pretty much tailor made for my skillset, which was why I got all excited and didn't look at the location until after my resume was sent.
Well, today I got an offer for the job. It'll be a slight paycut, but good money and possible growth potential.
Here's where I'm waffling.
One of the things I've also been working on is finding a new place to live. The house we're renting now is utterly fabulous, but completely out of our budget range with me having absolutely no income whatsoever. If I take this job, it's going to be out of state - with the pay, we MIGHT be able to make it, but my family will still have to find a cheaper place here in Oregon. I have no money to get out there, the employer is not paying relocation.
I want this job - I need A job, and I don't want to turn a perfectly good offer down, considering it's the closest I've come and - as we all know - jobs are scarce and hard to find.
But.... I'm really not sure how I'll pull it off...
TL;DR: | Found a job offer for a better offer - but not sure whether I should take it. | I've been out of work for 3 months and I'm not sure if I should take the offered job. I've got no money and no place to live, but I want the job more than anything. | Have a job offer, unsure whether I should take it due to my current situation, wondering if anyone has any advice on whether or not I should take it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [33 M] fiancee's [31 F] depression and weight gain are straining our relationship
POST: My fiancee has struggled in the past with episodes of depression accompanied by weight gain but has always managed to pull through, never really losing the weight but never gaining more than 2 to 5kg and always being focused on fitness and healthy living.
I proposed to her a little over a year ago and in the period between our engagement and now, she has had extended periods of depression and gained I would estimate more than 25kg. That is to say that in the 4 years we've been together, she has gone from athletic to heavily built to what would now be clinical obesity. We are supposed to be married in less than 6 months.
How do I communicate that her weight gain and extended depressive episodes are affecting everything from my attraction to her to my confidence in her ability to be a reliable mother and life partner? If she can't control her weight now with no stresses in life, what will happen when we have children?
TL;DR: | fiancee's depression and weight gain are causing her to lose motivation, confidence and her ability to be a loving mother and partner. How do I explain that this is a potential threat to our relationship? | fiancee has had multiple episodes of depression and gained a lot of weight in the past. Now she is getting fat and is no longer able to control her weight. I want to talk to her about it. | My fiancee has gained 25kg from her depression and has had no control over it. How do I get her to change her behavior to make sure she is a healthy mother and partner? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: How do I get/help my wife to femme it up a little?
POST: I love her and this is not, **repeat not**, a deal-breaker but I'd like her to be more feminine. She grew up basically feral, has no female relatives any less feral, and is too embarrassed to talk to her friends.
Feral's kind of a strong word, but I think I'll stick with it. The weird thing is that we have a young daughter who is princess/frilly dress/heels/hair/makeup obsessed - and who has a better sense of style than her mom. Weird.
She takes little care of her hair - getting her to actually have some has been an issue. I'm thinking about brushing her hair every day both to show her its possible for it to look nice (it is really thick and lustrous) and because it seems a nice, intimate contact thing to do.
I'm also going to buy her some perfume that I like. She couldn't care less but is open to it.
TL;DR: | My wife wants me to get more feminine, but she has no clue. We need advice to get her to do it. | My wife doesn't want to be girly. I'm going to help. How? | She is not a feral female but we have a daughter with the same hair/makeup style. How do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [23 MtF] am totally crushing on my [26 M] friend; My life is officially a soap opera
POST: Hello!
I'm a transgender woman and I'm kinda sorta smitten with my bisexual friend. He knows about my "condition", but what I don't know is how he feels about the whole "lady with non-standard genital configuration" thing, in regards to dating. I can't just ask him, either. Saying "Hey, how do you feel about dating trans women?" is so blatently obvious that I'd rather be eaten by a lion than say it.
We've been friends for a little over five months and I've been crushing on him for about three of those months. He was the first person I came out to, outside my family. He always treats me like a lady, and even corrects people when we're out in public and I get 'sir'ed. Basically, he's gentlemanliness incarnate.
I want to be closer to him, but I'm so afraid that telling him about my feelings will make everything super weird if he's not interested. I've never even dated anyone before this, and now I've gone from basic addition to quantum physics! I just want his arms around me, his lips on mine...
**ahem*\*
So yeah, complicated...
Also, he's kind of sleeping on my couch since he lost his place.
TL;DR: | I'm crushing on my friend, who I'm not friends with. He knows how I feel about it. He wants to marry me if I get rejected...
**ahem*\* | I'm crushing on my bisexual friend, but I'm too afraid to tell him, so I'm basically going to have to go to a room alone. | I'm crushing on my friend and I'm scared that telling him about my feelings might make everything weird. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Can you die from complications after a plasma donation?
POST: I live in a city that has a plasma donation center about a fifteen minute walk from where I live. I was donating twice a week for about three months. (twice a week is the max they allow) How it works is they draw your blood, run it through a centrifuge, take out the plasma, and return your blood cells to you mixed with an anticoagulant solution. On my 24th donation, I had two energy drinks beforehand, which was normal for me. Everything was going fine until when the machine was returning my blood to me, I very suddenly got very light headed, feeling as though I would pass out at any second. This had happened to me before, but it's still nerve racking. I called someone over, they slowed the machine down, i was fine after a minute. But then when the machine started to draw my blood again, I got very light headed again, which had not happened to me before. At this point I began to panic, I told them to take the needle out, and I lost almost a pint of blood. I felt light headed for a couple hours after. Then next day, I was totally fine, but the day after I got light headed just sitting on the bus. This freaked me out, so I went to the er. They took a blood sample, told me I was slightly anemic, and to take some iron. A week later, I think I'm getting light headed again, have a panic attack (a terrifying experience) went back to the er, checked out a couple hours later.
I now have post traumatic stress disorder, three months after the incident. I constantly have the fear that I could pass out at any moment and never wake up. I think that the plasma donation did something to my circulatory system that could kill me at any moment. So, are my fears completely irrational, or do I have reason to be concerned?
TL;DR: | I have a panic attack over a plasma donation while on a bus, do I have a reason to be concerned? | I got light headed, and now I have post traumatic stress disorder, but I think it could be related to the incident. | had an energy drink and blood drawn, got very lightheaded, panic attack, went to the ER, blood test showed I was slightly anemic and have post- traumatic stress disorder. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: Help! I think I really messed up
POST: I am going to begin with sorry for grammical errors and spelling. I am a 19 year old female and was currently in this 2 year relationship with 20 year old male. We really had the best relationship in the beginning and it was so much fun, then I started having really big issues with family. Right after I turned 18 years old my parents stopped doing everything, so this kid knowing me maybe 3months really started helping me a lot with rides to work, school, ect. But after 2 months got really annoyed with it even if I offered money he still thought of me as a nusense. So finally I just quit my job, well my parents got pissed about that too. So I would say maybe about four months and they kicked me out of the house, so my boyfriend's family took me in. I got a job and worked about 70 hours a week and my boyfriend would get upset that he wouldn't see me. So I would try and make time for him anyway I could and ask him to go on dates. The issue there is he would get embarrised because he had no money, he didn't work and I would accidentally bring it up. He started to really hate me for this. Finally he kicked me out so I lived with my sister in another state, he started to miss me and would drive up to see me. So I finally moved back, then around 3 months same issue came up and I came home to find all my stuff packed up. So I moved back with my parents but still saw him every week. Then we came into some issues with one of his friends (this kid always needs attention and does anything to get it). He was saying a lot of stuff about me, which got back to me and I assumed my boyfriend said it. I lost it and wrote a mean Facebook status (I know ,childish). The status said " I can't wait to have a boyfriend who doesn't constantly treat me like shit with a job". This really hurt the kids feelings and now won't even talk to me, even though I'm very sorry about it. I just don't know what to do, I need some advice.
TL;DR: | I got back in line of things, got out of line, got upset at my parents getting angry, now I'm feeling a lot happier. | I messed up a girl who is starting to hate me for something that didn't happen in the beginning of the relationship. I need help | I really did mess up, but I think I just want to move on from this and get back together with him even if it means losing everything. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Need some advice from people in LTRs. I[30/m] have been with my wife [31/f] for 10 years, how do you know if it's time to leave?
POST: Ok, a little background. My wife and I started dating in college, I was a late bloomer and she's my first real relationship. Things have been good, we of course have had our ups and downs but overall it's been good. We married a little over 3 years ago after dating for 7.
Nothing in particular has changed in our relationship but for the past year or so I can't seem to stop thinking about starting over, having a new life on my own terms. I don't feel like I'm unhappy with my wife, I still love her, we still spend most of our time together and have fun, but I can't shake this feeling. I try and push it away but I have these flashes of burning down my current life and starting from scratch. The idea of going it alone used to terrify me, but lately it's starting to sound, well still scary, but in a good way.
It makes me feel really bad about myself. I have a wife that loves me, who I love, and we have a good life together. I wish I could figure out what it means. Sometimes I think the fact that it would hurt a person I love dearly is the only reason I haven't done it.
So people who have been in long relationships, is this a phase that people go through or is this a symptom of something bigger I just can't see the shape of yet?
TL;DR: | Starts living the life we love, but is it a phase of life where people move forward or just go ahead and move on? | I think I'm ready to start my life alone, my wife and I are married. Is this a phase or is this something else? | I want to leave my wife of 10 years, but don't know if it's the right thing to do. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: What should I do after spending an intimate night with a girl?
POST: I met a wonderful girl, who for the sake of anonymity I shall call Sarah, at a ball (2 days ago.) We walked back to her place with her friend,let's call her Jane, before we left and on the way there it was made fairly clear that Sarah wanted a relationship, which is fine by me.
Once we got back to Sarah's place, Jane took Sarah's single bed. And we were left with a fold out couch in a communal area. Sarah was worried that as she had only been there a few weeks that one of her 5 house-mates would wake-up and see us there in the morning. I proposed that I leave before any of them wake-up, and she agreed. And asked me to wake her before I leave.
We spent that night together, extremely intimate (without actually having sex [use your imagination]), she fell asleep in my arms. I didn't get any sleep at all, but was thrilled at the intimacy. My alarm on my phone went off, I got dressed, we had a long kiss and I told her that I'd call (her response was "You better" with a grin on her face.) And went on my merry way.
TL;DR: | Met a girl who I've known for a while, went on my way. | I spent an awesome night with a girl, she wants the same, what should I do? | I spent an intimate night with a girl, and left before any of the house-mates woke up. What should I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by baking while drunk.
POST: On Christmas Eve, I was baking cookies like I do every year. I had mixed up some snickerdoodle dough and rolled it into balls, and my daughter wanted to help. I let her roll the dough balls in cinnamon sugar while I took some of my cookies to my neighbor's house. My neighbor let me in and I dropped the cookies on his kitchen counter. We sat down in the living room and did a few shots together. I'm a lightweight so about three shots in I was already pretty drunk. I did one more shot then went home and popped a batch of cookies in the oven. When I went to take them out, I burned my hand on one of the oven racks. Now, I'm used to burning myself while baking because I'm clumsy AF even sober, but they're usually small, superficial burns. I really got myself this time I had an inch and a half long blister across the back of my hand. I used a straight pin to poke a hole in the blister and drain it, leaving the skin on so the nerves underneath wouldn't be exposed while the burn was healing. I always do this to blisters. Well, this time, the skin over the blister started turning a nasty yellowish color and came off on its own, and then the burn got infected. There's a nice red circle around it now and it hurts worse than any burn I've ever had before, like an 8 on a scale of 1-10. I'm never baking drunk again. I'll post a pic of the burn if anyone wants to see it.
TL;DR: | I was baking cookies while drunk, I burned my hand on a oven rack while I baked, I used a straight pin to poke an oven rackshot, I burned my hand on a flat plane of the oven racks, and I'm a poor guy with no way to know where the burned skin started. | Baked cookies while drunk, burned my hand on the rims of the oven rack, drained the blister, and now I'm allergic to baking, never mind the burn. | Tried to help my kid by letting her help make snickerdoodles. Bought a new cookie and ended up with a new burn on my hand from a burned oven rack. I'll never bake while drunk again. |
SUBREDDIT: r/BreakUps
TITLE: 25m,24f, terrible breakup.
POST: I feel like i'm going to stop breathing. I'm so down-right depressed I feel like my lungs are going to collapse. Girl of 5 years dumped me. Over a stupid thing. 4 times this month. We got back together... 3 times. and the last time she left me. we had a highschool reunion... and my cell went out. for about 3 and a half hours. She knew i was going to go there, I told her, I also told her im going to be sober. But she went berserk when my cell woke up and told me I cheated on her and got drunk and cheated on her (i drank water the whole evening and went home first of everybody... i didn't smell of alcohol or anything. But she still said she doesn't believe me...). And a week ago she humiliated me in front of everybody, but she broke down in tears then... So i immediately forgave her... She was apparently sorry. Or not...
She is now regretting that she ever met me. She told me things that I could never say to her. She told me that i don't care about her. While i sobbed looking at the phone. She told me that I pulled the worst out of her.
The craziest thing is I can't imagine my life without her. The whole thing is making me crazy. I'm in so much pain that I've never been in my whole life, ever. I have no fucking idea what to do. I keep looking at the damn phone. I just want to stop... and rest. she blames me for everything. That I took 5 years of her life away. That I destroyed her and broke her heart. I have nothing but love for her. I adore her. I'm devastated.
We've been living together for 5 years.
TL;DR: | Girl of 5 years dumped me. I don't like it anymore. I feel like a complete failure. | She dumped me, told me she loved me but she didn't, I forgave her, she said she regrets it, now I'm depressed. | Girl of 5 years dumped me. I had a bad breakup. I'm depressed and can't stop thinking about her. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [21F] with my boyfriend [22M] of almost four years abroad in London and don't know what I want
POST: I've been dating my boyfriend for almost four years since we were 17. I've never slept with anyone else or had a real relationship besides this one. Everything between us was great the first three years. I knew how much I loved him, and we planned our life together. We spent every day together in high school, and we talked everyday throughout college, and basically lived together this summer in LA working internships.
However, this summer before I was abroad, I was full of doubts and still am. The thought of spending my entire life with him without experiencing other things scares me to death. However, a life without him in it is equally scary to me.
I communicated these feelings to him last month, and obviously he was very sad, but he hugged me and tried to comfort me--because he knew these feelings were tearing me apart. Now that I'm in London, I've been thinking more of what I want and I'm torn. I'm young and want to do different things, but I love him at the same time.
I tried to talk to him last night about taking a break, but he was completely against the idea. It's all or nothing with him. I don't think I could commit to never seeing or talking to him again, but I want to do my own thing here.
I don't really know what I want, but some perspective/opinions/personal anecdotes would be greatly appreciated.
TL;DR: | Been dating my boyfriend of 4 years for 4 years, but I can't decide if I want to commit to always seeing him or never. | I'm in a relationship with a guy who I'm very attached to, but I don't know where I'm going to be in a couple of years. | I'm 21F and in my first relationship. I'm torn between my first love, and my first love, and my first love. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Any doctors or med students lurking? What is the process to become a doctor like?
POST: I would like to become an anesthesiologist one day. I have thought about this a lot and would like to hear what it's like from some insiders. I am really not the type who can sit behind a desk all day. I'm prepared to sit at desks for studying, but I can't do it for 30+ years. I don't want to wear a suit and tie. I like to be up running around. Nothing else really interests me aside from extreme sports. I want to put my work in now and come out making a high salary. I don't want to climb the rungs of a corporate ladder. I've had friends with dads in construction, working 80+ hours a week. My dad as an engineer and programmer worked 80+ hours a week for years and his salary still isn't as high as an anesthesiologists (it's great for an engineer). I really just want to become an anesthesiologist.
TL;DR: | Any doctors or med students who want to become an anesthesiologist or vice-versa? | I want to become an anesthesiologist. I'm not looking for a position with a medical degree, but I want to be at the top. I like the outdoors, extreme sports, and I'm willing to work 80+ hours a week for a living. What is the process? | What is the process to become a doctor? How long does it take (how many years does it take) to become a doctor? What are the steps of being an anesthesiologist? |
SUBREDDIT: r/askwomenadvice
TITLE: Need help on telling if a girl likes me.
POST: I'm 21 and at University at the moment, a couple of weeks ago I met a girl in a club, we walked home and had a good chat. She invited me back to her flat, but I declined. The next couple of days we did some light texting. I then about a week later decided to text her and ask her out for a drink, to this she didn't reply. I did however here from her a few days later, where she apologized for not texting back.
Now in the last couple of weeks I have text her to which she ignored, then I get a text telling me to meet her. To top it off last night I was texted her (while drunk i may add) we then met, had a chat, she got some food and then on the way to our accommodation (we live in the same building on different floors) she said she was going up to eat, to which I said I was going to go back to my room and freshen up, she said she would text me but that text never came.
I should also add my flatmates have said it seemed she wanted me to go back to her room the night I met her, but I'm really bad at reading the signals people give.
Pretty much, am I thinking too much about it and should I just put down as a bad experience?
TL;DR: | Met a girl in a club, made a date, then texted a girl on how to get a date. She ignored my text and then said she wasn't going to text me anymore. | Met a girl, she invited me back to her flat, I declined, she said she would text me, I haven't received a single text. | Met girl, got rejected, asked her out a few days later then she did the same thing, then she told me she was going to go up to eat, which I said I wasn't going to do, she said she would text me, she never did. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (23M) can't tell if I really like my boyfriend (24M) or am just in the relationship for the attention/or afraid to be alone.
POST: So, I've been dating this guy for about 4 months now, the entire relationship has been long distance since the beginning due to different paths having us across the country. He's extremely gungho in the relationship, sends me care packages and texts me daily. I do things for him as well when I'm able to when time permits. We see each other about once a month but are never alone, he's either visiting friends and also visit me. Or work doesn't permit me to see him by myself.
We've never had sex either, mostly just foreplay in very odd situations. The other day I finally asked for us to open the relationship, it's something I wanted from the beginning but decided to do a monogamous, long distance relationship. He told me that he expects me to be 100% in or I'm not in at all but that he is okay with the idea of an open relationship. I don't know how to respond to that ultimatum. I like him but I don't know if I really like him enough to continue a relationship with him. This is my first relationship and his second.
TL;DR: | I can't tell if I like my boyfriend because of sex or because I don't know if I really like him enough. | Been dating my boyfriend for 4 months, he's extremely gungho, always sending me care packages and texting me daily. We've never been alone ever, neither of us has been on our own. He told me that he expects me to be 100% in or I'm not in at all, but that he is okay with an open relationship. I don't know if I should continue the relationship or just break up.
EDIT: Thanks for all the | I'm not sure I can continue a relationship with my boyfriend, he told me he is okay with the idea of an open relationship. |
SUBREDDIT: r/self
TITLE: fell down. ruined what I've been working toward all this year.
POST: I took a minor fall but because of how I landed I broke a couple of bones. That normally wouldn't be a major upset, just one of those things that happens and you get past it. But this happened two weeks to the day before the beginning of what I have been training, working, saving, and sometimes fighting for since the beginning of this year.
I had gone through a 5 year period of loss and depression in which I had become numb, overweight, lonely, and hopeless. Then I had an epiphany moment. I thought of a thing I wanted to do and I took steps toward doing it. I stood up for myself and started putting my needs on the priority list too. I started moving my body. I gave up wheat, lost my cravings for sugary, baked foods. I tracked my progress. And I kicked a**! I lost 50 pounds since January. I went from not leaving my house, mostly my bedroom, to doing daily bike rides, as long as 60 miles in a day. I gathered enough money to get everything I need together to take a bike trip that I haven't gone on in ten years.
The only way I can think of that I could still ride is on a recumbent bicycle or three-wheeled bike. I don't know of anyone that has one and buying or even renting one is out of the question. I spent everything getting my old bike ready and getting equipped.
I will still go, I paid a lot and it is too late to find someone to fill my place now. But the physical challenge of the ride was the main event for me. I'm very introverted and the festival atmosphere and crowds of people are challenging at best. I see there has been benefit in what I have been doing. But I really needed the week on my bike cut off from my regular life. Or I thought I did. The proverbial carrot being snatched away feels pretty cruel and twisted.
TL;DR: | I am a complete loser. I am in a way that is trying to stop myself from doing it. But I know it is not going to make it happen. I am also trying to do some more. | I broke my hip. Did it to myself. Now I can't walk. Can't do anything about it. Can't do it anymore. Now I have to get it taken care of ASAP. What do I do? I'm just looking for advice or any general advice for people who have had a major disaster that involves injury, hospitalization, or some other kind of major damage to their bodies. | fell down, ruined a year long goal, but got to spend time on the bike. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My new neighbor (50's(?)/F) can hear everything I (20's/F) do in my apartment, and it's disrupting her sleep. What do?
POST: My neighbor moved into the apartment adjacent to me a few days ago. Whilst she's a very nice lady, she seems to be very annoyed by my sound levels, as she can apparently hear every word I say through her walls. I'm not a particularly loud person- the noise I produce consists of chatting on Skype and playing soft music to help me sleep. However, no matter how softly I speak, she still hears me. The thing that makes this particularly problematic is my own sleep patterns; I happen to be most active at night, presumably when she's trying to fall asleep. I'm at an impasse because, while I want to continue living in a way that is comfortable to me, I don't want my neighbor to suffer for it. I'm in an LDR, so the Skype chats are dear to me, otherwise I'd cut them out. Has anyone been in a similar situation or have any advice to give?
TL;DR: | neighbors hear every word I give her, I want to be able to go from living in LDR to living in LDR. | Neighbor can hear everything I say through the walls of my apartment and it's making her uncomfortable. Any advice/advice? | New neighbor can hear everything I say and it's causing her to lose sleep. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [29 M/F] with my 32 M] husband and 2 year son; secretly trying to get his Mom (my MIL) to get a job here and live with us.
POST: Still kind of in shock over this.
I just happened to pick up the ipad and see that my husband has been sending emails to his mother telling her that he is going to try his hardest to get her a job at his company, and that they can move into our house. He hasn't told me anything about this. She and his Dad live 2.5 hours away right now, which is, IMO- a perfect distance.
We've been going to therapy for other reasons - mainly because he's reneged on our initial after-marriage plans. When we got married, we were planning on moving halfway between both in-laws, but now he dosen't want to. My family lives 6 hours away and I rarely see them and only talk to them once a week, but he told the therapist that I'm too close to them.
But now he's secretly trying to get his mom to move down here? Please. It hurts my brain. Also, the cost of living here is really high, so if she DID get the job-- she'd probably be living with us for quite some time, which I am NOT mentally prepared for. And when she did move out, I don't think I can deal with anymore 'drop in' visits to see my son (who is 2.) They already do it enough and they live 2 hours away now.
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TL;DR: | My husband is trying to get his MIL to get a job at his company that is 2.5 hours away; we have been going to therapy for other reasons. | My husband is trying to get my MIL to move down here from my family 2.5 hours away for a job. It makes me sad and anxious, and I'm not sure if I can handle it (or how he'll go about it) | Husband wants to get his Mom a job here and live with us. I'm not sure I can deal with this! |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [24F] not knowing how to handle my BF [24M] confessing
POST: I have been with him for 3 years now. A few days ago he told me over the phone, just before bed that he is developing feelings for this other girl [22F], let's call her T. He says he still wants to be with me.
A bit about T. He got to know T through a group assignment at uni last term and although the assignment is over, they've kept in contact with each other over Facebook, texts and weekly study sessions. Initially the messages were strictly about uni/study but they started exchanging pictures of their pets, a few selfies, liking his profile picture...it grew *friendlier* if you like. When I started getting suspicious and voiced it to him, he made me feel like I was being irrational/paranoid.
Eventually it started intruding on my time with my BF. We were out on our anniversary date and he would be messaging her. We would have dinner together and he would send her pictures of his food. Somehow he failed to mention that he had a GF in the entire time they've known each other but I am quite sure neither T nor my BF have done anything physical.
After he told me, we agreed that he would stop seeing her and cut down on messaging as well. Meeting him in the last few days was hard because as much as I want to forgive him, I am constantly reminded of what he had done...and I don't think he understands how I am struggling because he continues to make jokes about 'her pussy' (she has a cat). He called it his coping mechanism but I couldn't handle feeling the stress of trying to love somebody who has hurt me. So...I told him that we should take a one week break. Don't contact either T or me.
However this morning he messaged me saying he was going to meet up with her tomorrow. He says this is his way of getting over her...but it just causes me more pain and I don't know if I can trust him.
TL;DR: | BF of 3 years is trying to stop seeing his GF, despite me being in contact with him. Don't know if I can trust him or if I should contact him. | BF is texting/chatting with another girl and I feel it is a sign of his distress. I don't know how to handle this...I don't want him to do anything stupid but I feel like he is trying to get over her. | BF is meeting up with another girl after telling me he was going to stop talking to her and I am not sure how to handle it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [25 F] with my boyfriend [24 M] of 4.5 years, have not seen or spoken to each other (besides a few texts here and there) for 2 months.(Story in comments)
POST: Been dating the same guy for 4.5 years. He lives a little over an hour away. We were really close in the beginning. Over the past two years, there has been a decline. I have addressed this multiple times and he refuses to work on the relationship and sometimes just ignores me.
Eventually, it became that every time we saw each other he would mainly play video games. Later, he joined a band. I went to see the band once. No one in the band knew that he had a girlfriend and felt uncomfortable that I was around. I later had to tell them I was the girlfriend to which they replied ,"Sorry, we didn't know he had a girlfriend." We always had each other's facebook passwords as a form trust. He changed his facebook password and had me walk to the otherside of the room as he typed his info in. I tried to ask him about this and just changed the subject.
Over the past two months, he has made no effort to see me. He has never called me. He did not acknowledge Valentine's day or my birthday. There have been a few texts here and there ,but nothing of real substance. About a week ago he sent he a picture of a glass he bought. I said "cool" and that was the end of the conversation.
The question is; should I try to mend things or just break-up? If I do break-up, how should I do it?
TL;DR: | oyfriend has recently been ignoring me, has not heard from me since. Should I try to fix things? | y boyfriend of 4.5 years has made no effort to see me for the past 2 months. | oyfriend hasn't said a word to me in 2 months. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [f23] don't want to go on a second date with [m24]. He is angry and thinks I'm shallow
POST: A month ago I met a 24M on Okcupid. We liked each others pictures and hit it off, and so went on the date.
The date was... Cringeworthy. First off he was 5'5 at most instead of 5'9 like he said he was. I'm a 5'7 female, not a freakishly tall woman ny any means, but I do look for a man who is at least my hight or taller. I don't think that's unreasonable. I mean, I'm slightly overweight and I don't expect great abs or CQ model looks. But I won't date shorter than me.
The guy, lets call him Josh, made me uncomfortable throughout the entire date. He made sexual comments, asked me about my sexual past etc. He played a cheesy song, wrote a crappy poem for me at the restaurant and said he loved me...
I was really annoyed with him. When the bill came I planned on splitting it, but he had forgotten his wallet and I ended up paying. He asked me for another date but I told him we weren't compatible and thanked him for the evening. He seemed okay, but then he started texting me, asking if it was because of his height. I told him it wasn't. He sent me an angry message about how I am only a a 6\10 and that women only want 6'5 guys and that he had to lie on dating sites.
Honestly yes, his height is a turn off but his behavior is more so. He now texts me about once a day and tries to convince me to 'be friends'. I don't want anything to do with him. What can I do?
TL;DR: | He is really bad news, but I don't want to date him and he's getting in the way of our relationship. | I've just got home from a date. I'm 5'7, he's 5'5. He makes me uncomfortable.
Thanks for reading. | Guy I met on okcupid asked me out on a second date. He is a jerk. I don't want anything to do with him. What can I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: We've said I love you...but I feel like we should say it more?
POST: My boyfriend and I are both 18 and have been dating for almost 9 months. He said "I love you" first after about 7 months and I said it back (I had known I love him for a few months but didn't want my saying it to pressure him since this is his first relationship). Since then I've said it like "goodnight I love you" and he says it back but I noticed he doesn't say it first. He's probably only said it like 4 times since the first time. I'm not sure how to talk to him about it because I don't want to seem weird like "hey I think we should say 'I love you' more" but I also get really self conscious always saying it first in order to hear it back. I guess the only plus is that its really special when I hear it since its not very often but I also feel really sad when I want to say it but feel like he'll just say it back because I said it. Pleaseee help! Or tell me how often other people in relationships say 'I love you'
TL;DR: | boyfriend said "I love you" and I'm not sure if it's right or wrong. | I've said I love you a few times and he says it back but I'm wondering how to talk to him about it since its usually after I've said it. | How often do people say 'I love you' when in a relationship? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Is windows 8 as a primary os sort of ready yet?
POST: So As of late I've had a large stroke of bad luck and today my windows decided to go nuts. Upon starting up my laptop this morning I got a few errors, looking them up and trying to fix them I got rid of them. 10 minutes later I got a windows update so I restarted my laptop, windows 7 bootscreen comes up then a blue screen of death decides to show up. Thinking the BSOD was a fluke I restarted again and I got the loginscreen, logged in, desktop was starting up as slow as hell and then again a BSOD...
So after a hard long search for my Windows 7 disk, I find out that it was thrown away a long while ago with the key... As I am against pirating, I'm probably going to buy windows 7 again but I remembered that the consumer version of Windows 8 is already here...
TL;DR: | Windows 8, Windows 7, windows 7 bootscreen, BSOD of windows 7, BSOD of windows 7 bootscreen. | A BSOD is a BSOD, and I'm not sure if this is a good sign | I'm pretty sure I just got a free Windows 8 license but I don't know if I should get it, it is sort of ready. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [26 F] with my ?? [27/28 M] 5mo, I like him more and it sucks.
POST: I think I need a kick in the pants.
A few months ago I started having sex with a (not close at all) friend and everything was good. We were both recently out of relationships and it was fun. I caught the feels and things started going downhill from there. At that point we discussed it and concluded there were feelings on both ends but unsure about starting an actual relationship (he didn't want to, I didn't know).
But now it's obvious I like him more and it sucks. When we're together it's good but when we're not it's not good at all. We used to hang out a lot but lately not much at all, due to him. When he doesn't want to, I get upset. Often I hide it but occasionally it bubbles out and I ask him to just tell it like it is if he doesn't like me anymore. It makes me feel insane but I can't seem to help it. After a while, I calm down, but as soon as I think I'm okay, I get sucked right back in.
Ironically I've been casually dating another guy about the same amount of time and we're in opposing positions - he likes me more and I'm on the fence. It makes me feel guilty when I'm upset about the first guy and don't have the energy to give the second any attention.
Just in case of questions, neither knows about the other, but both know we're not exclusive.
I'm not sure what I want out of this or either of them. I wish things were back to earlier in the summer when everything was just for fun, or that I could take a step back emotionally.
TL;DR: | I want to get in a relationship, but I don't know if I should. | I like a guy more than he likes me. When we're together it's good but when we're not it tastes bad. | I like the guy we're in an exclusive relationship with, he doesn't like me anymore and it sucks. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: What's the best/most memorable wedding you've ever been to, and why?
POST: I'm helping my best friend plan her wedding. Never planned anything like a wedding before. I was hoping there would be a /r/weddingporn subreddit like /r/foodporn and /r/roomporn, but I can't find anything like that. So I thought I'd ask the hive mind: what was the most memorable wedding you've ever been to, and why?
I'm looking for inspiration and hoping your stories give me ideas. My friend isn't religious, but she's into the idea of incorporating cool wedding customs from other cultures/religions/etc., if we can make them meaningful to her.
Obviously she's on a budget and not hiring a real wedding planner, but I would still love to hear stories about crazy, outrageous, big weddings because we might be able to figure out ways to do smaller versions of bigger ideas.
TL;DR: | Looking for stories telling me about how amazing a wedding you've been to, and why. And why. | What's the most memorable wedding you've ever been to, and why? | Looking for stories about awesome wedding customs, and why they're awesome, and how we can make them a part of the wedding we're planning for my best friend. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [22F] with my bf[23m] been together just over a year, broken up and I cannot help but feel so guilty.
POST: So me and my now ex met online July 2013. From the start I knew he was a really disciplined individual because of his eating habits ( very strict; non GMO, only free range meats etc..), his education and his martial arts career.
Things were great up until 4 months ago, we would argue all the time about everything. We would have super intense arguments over the stupidest things like me wearing make up (he thought I looked hideous and super fake) or like me talking about something stressful in my life without warning him first that I was going to do that. He restricted my ability to talk about my stress in life to the weekends because he "couldn't handle my emotions all the time" and when it came down to discussing my stress or an argument, he would dissect every emotion to action to reaction to emotion. I just couldn't do that anymore, even after letting him know all I wanted him to do is just to listen, not to analyze in explicit detail everything I was feeling and my actions because of those feelings.
I even went to counseling for the last 3 weeks because he said my communication is poor and I don't understand the English Language ( even though it is my first language). I was just going to counseling by myself. He never offered to come along with me.
So I broke up with him yesterday, and it wasn't until I said " I realized through the counseling that I am just done trying to make us work" was he then willing to commit and go to counseling and "Do whatever it takes to keep you here with me" I didn't give in to that because I feel like if he really did want to make us work, he would have been that committed since the beginning of our problems.
But now I feel really guilty. I feel like I should have given him that opportunity. I don't know if it's just a post break up feeling or if I genuinely made a huge mistake.
TL;DR: | Broke up with my bf, feel like I got cheated on, don't know if I should break up with him or not. | Ex-bf has been through a lot of bad things in our relationship, but I feel really guilty for breaking up with him. | Boyfriend and I had a huge fight, ended up breaking up, I feel like I should have given him the chance to work it out because I really wanted to make it work. Now I feel so guilty. |
SUBREDDIT: r/BreakUps
TITLE: Me [18m] and my gf [15f] just broke up a few days ago after 2.5 years.. Where do I go now?
POST: I apologize because I'm sure people on this thread have read a ton of "How do I get over her/him" posts, but this was my first serious relationship, and I am not sure where to begin with continuing my life.
Basics: Me and her were dating for 2 and a half years, and we just broke up a few days ago. It wasn't a bad break and we weren't fighting, we had a civil discussion which basicly concluded to the fact that neither of us was truly happy and we needed to move on.
Me and this girl have done everything together for the last two years, she comes on family camping trips and vacations with me, she spends a week or more sometimes living at my house, and now I feel kind of lost.
I'm happy with the break, I know that it's the right thing for me, but I don't want to lose all of the good things that we had in our relationship, and I'm not sure if it's healthy to continue hanging out and enjoying the things we enjoy together as friends instead of as a couple.
So my question is, where do I go next? What is my next step? I have an entire summer vacation ahead of me before I start my first year of college, and I don't want to spend it all trying to get over this girl. She was such a huge part of my life, that without her I feel like I'm missing part of myself.
I'm trying to view this, and college starting, as an entire new beginning. I'm reconnecting with some old friends, I cut my hair, I've started yoga and doing some activities I haven't done in a long time.
TL;DR: | Broke up a few days ago, and I don't know where to go from here. Do I keep going? | We broke up a few days ago and I'm trying to move forward from there, but I'm having trouble with how to do it and I need help! | Me and GF of 2.5 years broke up a few days ago.. Don't know where I go next and am having a hard time getting over her. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Gf troubles I (m18)recently found out something about my (18F) gf that is really bothering me
POST: My gf and I have been dating for about a year and 4 months. We have had a good relationship with only a few hiccups, she is my first gf and I am her first bf. Lately I have been hitting the gym with my friend and I have grown close to him and is now my best friend. In recent time we have been talking about masturbation, she has been comfortable about talking about it with me. She was very upset that I watched porn but she would let me, that same day I found out through another friend that she masturbated to the thought of my best friend which in result really angered me and hurt in a way. I thought I was over reacting but I can't seem to get over it. When I asked if it was true she said it was true and I cussed at her through text and told her to leave me alone, because I just was really upset because he is my best friend. After this I texted her and we were back to normal but then we started to sext and the thought of what happened haunts me and now I can't bare the thought of her. So I told her that I needed space to think and to leave alone for a while, I said this politely and she understood. Now she called me and left a voicemail because I was busy and she said that she was bad at giving me space and was hoping to hear my voice, but that she will leave me alone until I text or call her. So my question is that was my behavior bad? Over reaction? Also what should I do from here?
TL;DR: | I was upset about my friend's masturbation, and she is upset, who is upset? | I masturbated to the thought of my best friend and she found out through another friend and I can't get past it. | gf masturbates to my best friend, she was upset about it and told me not to masturbate but I did anyway and she left me alone. Now she is calling me and leaving a voicemail. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I'm [24M] in a long distance relationship with my gf [22F]. I'm not sure how to advance this
POST: We have been together for a year but we live on different continents. She's about to graduate and I've already been working for quite some time. I come visit her every chance I get and I feel like we're really compatible. How would I take this to the next level?
I get thoughts of wanting to propose to her, but that would require her to leave her entire life, friends, career future and family away to move in with me. I feel like that's a lot to ask for, but is it? I'm not sure..
I've already brushed indirectly about the subject, asking if she'd want to stay where she is. She said she definitely would want to leave her country, but again, I feel like I'd feel better if I got to know that she's willing to do it because she thinks is right rather than do it because I asked her out of love.
TL;DR: | Long distance relationship, I'm in a long distance relationship with my gf. I feel like I've been too selfish for asking her out. | How can I make her realize that she'd rather stay where she is and be with me than move to a country with no job prospects? | We have been together for a year but live on different continents. We have been dating for a year and a half. I want to ask her out but I feel like it would be a lot to ask. What should I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [35F] with my boyfriend [38M] 2.5 years, I think I just gave him an ultimatum? **UPDATE**
POST: [Original post.
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We had breakfast a week later and talked about everything, the house and whatnot, and he said he is working on it and he feels awful about it and doesn't want to lose me and he missed me a lot this week. He said his goal is to be in there by the end of the month and I reiterated that I am willing to help in any way I can, and gave some specific examples of how I would be willing to help.
As of Friday, he is living in his house full-time.
He made a good point about how my eagerness to "start our life together" made him feel like I didn't like or appreciate what we have now, which I understand in a way. I had to explain that it wasn't that, it was that I love what we have now so much that I want MORE. i want to transition to more. I think he got that.
We continued it into dinner and he kept mentioning THE PLAN ("the plan" being a plan for our future/to propose) again and i was like WHAT IS THE PLAN and he said he couldn't tell me, so I asked for a timeframe at least, and he said he plans to propose by the end of the year (!!!!).
I asked him to please tell my PARENTS the plan so they will stop asking me or saying OH MAYBE HE'LL PROPOSE on any holiday or special occasion and making me anxious.
Then we had really, really good sex.
TL;DR: | boyfriend and i got a ultimate ultimatum of 2.5 years to start living together. he said he will propose by the end of this year but i am also willing to make up for past experiences. | I have a plan of what I want, and we have a good time together. He is very supportive, we both are excited and happy. I have a very good feeling about the future. Now I'm just feeling insecure that he is doing the same plan as I. | Boyfriend asked for a timeframe, I told him to tell the family, he told me he has to talk to me about it. I'm not sure if he wants to propose or not. Am I being an ass? |
SUBREDDIT: r/askwomenadvice
TITLE: How do I safely lower my libido?
POST: I'm a 20 year old female and I get that this is only normal considering my age but I can't handle myself anymore. I have never had sex and don't plan on it right now due to body issues etc. I masturbate everyday and sometimes more than once. I stopped watching porn because its unfulfilling and instead sext/phone sex with a guy friend of mine. I've been regularly going to the gym. Eating mostly healthy and sleeping the right amount. But regardless of all this, I feel horny almost all the time, especially with this guy friend. I've come to the point where I feel I need sex and having had a bad experience before and where I am with my self image right now, I can't get myself to participate in sexual intercourse. Please let me know of any ways I can help lower my libido. Thank you
TL;DR: | My libido goes down as a result of having sex with a friend of my age who is an asshole. I feel horny everytime I am in a relationship. | How do I lower my libido/get over the self image issues? | I'm a 20 year old female and can't keep my libido up. Help me lower my libido. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: 25M professional artist/animator/illustrator dating hobbyist artists. How to deal?
POST: Not sure how useful it is to post this here but here goes.
I am usually pretty critical about art in general. I'm excited when people are into it but it's really difficult when someone says they do art, you date them then they link you to their deviantart and it's all really really amateur sketches of anime characters. What do I do at this point when I am really critical about this particular stereotype regarding 'hobbyist artists' who turn out to.....not be any good?
I can't just go on lying saying their art is good when my standards are pretty high at this point. Been doing this stuff over 10 years. Visual art is something 'anyone' can do, so the quality of it varies a lot.
Am I being an asshole or can someone actually give me good advice on how to overcome this? Am I supposed to say 'yeah it's good' then turn around to my other art friends and defend how good it is later? It's not like I'm dating a med student and telling her I'm a doctor in my spare time...
TL;DR: | 25M professional artist/animator/illustrator dating hobbyist artists. How to deal? | I am a professional artist/animator/illustrator and I am tired of dating hobbyist artists who are really bad. How do I deal? | I'm a pro art guy, dating someone who is not a pro art guy. What do I do to overcome this? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Girlfriends[32] ex still hangs out with her daughter.
POST: Hello,
Recently things have gotten more serious with my gf who is 32 and has a daughter and myself who is 29 and has no kids. She broke up with her ex somewhat recently, maybe 6 months ago or so. Her ex constantly calls to talk to her daughter (nearly nightly) and watches her probably one or two nights a week, and hangs out with her for probably every other weekend (for the whole weekend). When we first started hanging out I didn't really care, but now that she wants to be more serious it's starting to seem very strange to say the least. I brought it up a tiny bit by saying I understand that you dated him for like 3 years but doesn't he want his own children and family someday? What if you moved across the country? He's not the dad. I know it would be hard to let go of a child, but for his sake and the little girls sake I wonder what's right. The conversation didn't really go anywhere and she just said if he wants to see her she isn't going to say no. I tried to let it go but now this week he is taking her daughter for a week and a half camping trip. This just seems wrong to me, and it seems like most men she dates in the future would question it and most women her ex dates would wonder why he is always with her ex's daughter. I feel like there's something nefarious behind this, and maybe one or the other is trying to keep hooks in the other through the child. It seems so strange to me, am I being crazy?
TL;DR: | My boyfriend is in a relationship now and she's in his car, and he's taking his daughter on a trip. I don't know what to do. | Girlfriends ex still hangs out with her daughter which is weird and seems like a setup for something else to go down soon. | Girlfriend is in a relationship with an ex who hangs out with his daughter often. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My friend [16 F] is hurt by what her boyfriend [15 M]of one/two months said about her
POST: My friend (Mary) was Face timing with her boyfriend (Joe) and started to ask him about what he dislikes about her. Joe mentions that he doesn't really like Mary's small chest and dislikes her bony hands. (She's really skinny). Of course, Mary is hurt by this and I'm not sure how to judge Joe. He has consistently shown signs of immaturity but he seems to care for her well being.
I understand that people have preferences and all but how should a person react to this kind of confession? Does he genuinely love her if he finds these physical qualities about her a bit unappealing?
TL;DR: | Friend is hurt by what her boyfriend said about her, how do I get her to understand that her body and hands are unattractive and don't seem to fit in nicely? | my friend was hurt and hurt by her boyfriend's words about her and how he finds her very unappealing. How should he be treated? Or is he being too immature? | friend was talking with boyfriend about her body, boyfriend said he dislikes her small chest and dislikes her bony hands. how to react to this? Does he love her? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I need some advice regarding a female friend of mine. (she's almost 20 and i'm almost 22)
POST: Okay, I've been friends with this girl for about 10 months. I first met her at college about a year ago. She had a boyfriend at first, but eventually she broke up with him, and started to pay more attention to me. Soon, we went out several times, started to text a lot, etc. She made it seem like she wanted me to be her boyfriend by how she acted, but when school was over and we went back home (we live relatively close) she acted like she didn't have time to hang out.
Eventually she told me she was going out with this other guy, whom she actually did make her boyfriend. I was pretty devastated, and I realized I had been friendzoned. We still text constantly.
Anyway, she's been dating him for a couple months and she mentions how she's having trouble trusting him, because he's going to NYC this weekend and some hot friend of his will be there. Oh yeah, and she mentioned that he told her that he has cheated on his girlfriends before, but he would *never* do it again. I just want to ask her what the fuck she is thinking, but I don't want to come off as a dick, and I don't want to ruin my future chances by giving her a piece of my mind. I'm obsessing over this; I really like her a lot, and I care about her, but I really don't understand what's going through her head. Any advice?
TL;DR: | I need advice on a friend of mine, she's 20, is 16, is about to be 17. I just want advice on the best way I can proceed. | I've been friendzoned by a girl, I'm obsessing over whether or not to confront her about it. | I'm not sure if my friend is making a mistake by dating a guy that's been cheated on before. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by inviting the locals to hang out with the hairy twins
POST: Ok as is quite common, this didn't happen today, this happened many years ago in the far north Australian town of cooktown
Cooktown, was a great place, heaps of Sun, good fishing etc.
But just my luck as a young boy, I ventured into the Bush to get my fishing line (my bad for a terrible cast) and disturbed some local natives, I didn't notice anything at the time.
The hours passed and I was enjoying fishing on the jetty, my body began to succumb to urinary urges and I went in search of a place to Pee, which as a guy is easy.
Anyway, for some reason I couldn't feel myself peeing, again, didn't think much of it.
Later in the day I needed to take a Shit, and I couldn't feel my Ass when sitting on the toilet seat, at this time I brought it to my parents attention. We went to cooktown hospital, or medical clinic, I don't really remember. The doctor had a look, specifically my rear end, and I remember the doctor quite well, he was a very chatty person and at the moment his eyes laid upon my rear end he went quiet, and after a few seconds of awkward silence he uttered words I'll never forget "oh Shit". A paralysis tick had found it's way to the back of my scrotum, that little bloodsucking demon, it's head buried deep within my manlyhood, after 4 hours of the doctor trying to extract the tick with the conventional methylated spirits way, and by the way, metho on your balls feels unusual. In the end I was anesthetised and a portion of my scrotum, including the bulbous little monster was removed. I couldn't Pee without crying like a little Bitch for a month and I cannot Pee straight anymore, on top of that I now have a tight shiny scarred scrotum.
TL;DR: | Tried to get a Shit with my ass, I got a bit confused; Help?! | Invited the locals to hang out with the hairy twins, and got infected by a cockroach in the back of my scrotum, have a massive tight scrotum, and now cannot pee straight. | TIFU by trying to piss on a toilet seat in a town where it was not normal to piss on the toilet seat. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My GF [25, F] and I [24, M] live together, but she lost her job and isn't really trying to find a new one. [3 years, 9 months cohabiting]
POST: My GF lost her job 3 weeks ago today. As of this point, to the best of my knowledge, she has only submitted a single resume to a potential employer, despite being home all the time. She didn't even file for her unemployment benefits until Saturday, 19 days after she was let go.
I can afford the rent if she were to be unemployed, but things would be stretched far too thin for me to have any kind of flexibility or free time, as I would be putting in extra overtime.
The fact that she is so seemingly unmotivated to find a job really bothers me, and I don't want to have to support both of us as a young adult who is still establishing his career.
The relationship was somewhat strained before all this happened, but now it is getting to be so much that I am 50/50 on whether or not to continue. If I were to end things, she wouldn't really have a guaranteed place to go - her parents live locally, but her father moved into her room when she moved out, and she would hate to move back in with them anyway, due to major differences in ideals.
So, I'm not sure what I should do. She's not helping herself, and is showing zero initiative in taking her own future under control. She stays at home watching anime and playing WoW. She hasn't taken on any additional chores at the house despite having 50 hours of extra free time a week. What do you guys think?
TL;DR: | GF lost her job three weeks ago, she is now doing a lot of work and would really like to find a new job. Should I leave this relationship, and stay as a family friend? | GF has no motivation to find a job, and is not taking any initiative to take control of her future. What should I do? | my GF lost her job, is not taking any initiative to find a new one despite having 50 hours of extra free time every week. I don't know what to do. |
SUBREDDIT: r/offmychest
TITLE: I am sick and tired of having to deal with my severely depressed and sometimes seemingly suicidal friend.
POST: My friend, lets call him Dude, has been dealing with depression (undiagnosed but I know for sure it is, he just refuses to see a doctor or tell his family) For almost a year now he has been doing nothing but complaining and whining about the same three things, every day.
No matter what I say to him he never stops complaining.
He is in love with a mutual friend,obsessive, unhealthy love, and she doesn't feel the same way at ll. This drives him crazy and makes him question his entire life. Every few months they they a huge fight because she gets tried of saying no and trying to explain how she doesn't have the same feelings towards him and this causes him to break down and question living. Its the same thing, every time, every few months and I am so damn tired of having to repeat the same things over and over.
He one of my best friends, but Im at my wits end here. I cant keep doing this wash rinse repeat bullshit that he puts himself and everyone around him through.
He refuses to seek help or tell his family how he feels. I have a bunch of texts from him explaining how he wants to kill himself and how he keeps thinking of new ways. I have them saved, but he thinks I have deleted them. If he continues to refuse help and get deeper into his depression Im going to show his parents the texts.
I just cant keep doing this anymore, I cant keep watching him destroy himself yet refuse to get help when its clear he needs it. I am respecting his wishes and not telling his parents or anyone else, but if this keeps up and he seems to be getting closer to harming himself Im going to tell his parents.
This has been building up for a year now, I just need to get this off my chest.
TL;DR: | My friend has been complaining and whining about everything for most of a year. He is in love with a mutual friend,obsessive, unhealthy love, and she doesn't seem like she is getting the same way. How can I fix this? | my friend refuses to get help with his mental problems and is obsessing over a woman he has feelings for. He is in a constant cycle of complaining and questioning his life until he destroys himself and then he refuses to get help. | Friend is in a severe depression that I cannot seem to get through to him, and his parents dont understand why he is so depressed. I am having to do this constantly. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Help, please. M(26)y WiF(25)e and I just looked at our wedding photos and she hates them.
POST: So my wife and I have been married for two months and we just got our first look at our wedding photos. She hates them. My wife feels like there are a ton of photos of my family and hardly any of her's, in truth our photographer did appear to focus on my family. In addition, she felt like a lot of the pictures didn't look as "professional" as she was expecting (i.e., bad lighting, our stances look forced, bad positioning of flowers and whatnot, very few photos of guest and other family, pictures of the photographers daughters at the wedding mixed with the wedding party, etc.).
The photographer in question is someone we know through our church. My father is also the pastor of said church so bringing up our displeasure would cause a lot of drama we would prefer to avoid, if possible. If necessary we will talk to our photographer like adults, but, in my experience, being a pastor's son can make it difficult to keep my issues centered on me and not somehow transferred onto my dad. That was a long way of saying I'm looking for a solution where I can do something special for my wife and keep it between us and family.
My wife has a, "I don't want to talk about it because there is nothing to do about it" mentality right now. Even now she is in a bit of a quiet rage at the other end of out couch. I'm looking for a possible solution of something I could do that would help ease her anger and, hopefully, make up for some of the bad photos. Obviously I can't go back in time and getting all that family together again would be incredibly difficult but I'm willing to hear all advise and ideas. Has anyone been in a similar situation or have any ideas of what I can do to help make this better?
TL;DR: | My wife hates photos of her family, I'm looking for a way to change that. | Wife hates our wedding photos and I need a way to make it better without ruining the family dynamic. | My wife is upset with our wedding photo and I would like to help her out and make this better. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: (21F) Found porn on my bf's (21M) tablet. He says it's not his, but no one else has used his tablet.
POST: Background: Him and I have been together for about 1 year and a half. He's only given me a reason to doubt him once, and I can't actually blame him for it because we were not technically together. That's whole other story.
Now, it's not that I don't care if he looks at porn, because I do care. I feel jealous and insecure. Yet, I don't forbid him from doing it. I won't even be upset if he does, just secretly jealous. So, I've never told him that he can't look at porn. To me, it sounds like "lame girlfriend taking away all my fun".
He's told me repeatedly that he doesn't look at porn because he no longer feels the need to. When I even offered to look at porn with him, he refused and said he would much rather just have sex with me.
So that's why I'm so darn confused about finding porn on his tablet that he claims isn't his.
...Is he lying? I honestly don't know. He's never lied to me before. No one comes over to our apartment, so it's not like he had a horny friend over mess with his tablet. He doesn't take it anywhere so that someone could have put it on his tablet.
I mean I found like 10 pictures downloaded to his gallery. How does that happen accidentally? Do ghosts download porn to tablets or something? (just kidding)
Am I being naive to believe him or is this really just weird? Does porn sometimes show up on your computers/tablets randomly?
Please don't be mean, I feel really dumb even asking this.
TL;DR: | Found porn on my bf's tablet. He says it's not his. He doesn't know. He denies it. He says it's not his. He said he doesn't have a sexual attraction to porn. He says it's not his. He denies it. He says it's not his. He denies it. He denies it. He says it's not his. He says it's not his but it is. He says it's not his. He says | I'm getting super jealous and insecure over finding porn on my bf's tablet. We've never been together. He says he doesn't look at porn anymore and it feels like all he does is watch porn. Am I being naive or is this really just weird? | Bf said he does not look at porn. I believe him. I found porn on his tablet. Is he lying about not looking at porn? |