Take Me To The Pilots ’13: CBS’ ‘We Are Men’

[In case you’ve Forgotten, and as I will continue to mention each and every one of these posts that I do: This is *not* a review.  Pilots change.  Sometimes a lot.  Often for the better.  Sometimes for the worse.  But they change.  Actual reviews will be coming in September and perhaps October (and maybe midseason in some cases).  This is, however, a brief gut reaction to not-for-air pilots.  I know some people will be all “These are reviews.”  If you’ve read me, you’ve read my reviews and you know this isn’t what they look like.] 

Show:“We Are Men” (CBS)Airs:Mondays at 8:30 p.m. The Pitch: “Sex and the City” for sad, desperate middle-aged men.  So… “Entourage” in its later years. Quick Response: New TV Season Pet Peeve: People who compare “We Are Men” to “Happy Endings,” just because both shows begin with a guy being ditched at the altar, even though the scene in “We Are Men” is explicitly a referencing “The Graduate” and “We Are Men” has nothing particular in common with “Happy Endings” otherwise.  I lead this blurb with that essentially meaningless annoyance because there’s hardly any point in saying anything about “We Are Men.”  It’s there.  And by causing me almost no discomfort or pain, it’s better than “Partners,” which tanked in this slot last year.  It’s better than “Dads,” which has a similarly disconnected sensibility regarding homosocial friendship.  And it’s better than the legion of Mancession comedies which several networks, mostly ABC, tried and failed with a couple years ago.  So what I’m saying is that I was prepared to be annoyed or offended by “We Are Men” and, instead, I was merely bored.  Victory!  Tony Shalhoub seems amused to be playing a sleazy letch at this point in his career and who am I to begrudge Tony Shalhoub’s self-amusement?  Jerry O’Connell seems amused to be wandering around in a banana hammock in several scenes and who am I to begrudge the fat kid from “Stand by Me” wanting to show off that he’s still the kinda stud-muffin who can marry a former super-model?  Kal Penn seems a bit uncomfortable and I’m not sure how I’d describe his character, but he may just be easing back into TV after his brief period sorta-kinda working for the Obama Administration, so perhaps he’ll find something to amuse him by the fourth or fifth episode.  And then there’s Christopher Smith, who is playing what absolutely would have been the Josh Cooke role two or three years ago and I want to warn him that shows that contain A Josh Cooke Role usually suffer A Josh Cooke Fate, which is speedy cancellation.  But I forgot he was there, which is at least as much a factor of his not having much of a character as his not giving much of a performance.  The fact is, I kinda like the backdrop of a “Quality furnished short-termed housing” complex in Tarzana and I don’t hate the core trio not counting Chris Smith (who I also don’t hate, but who I really have no opinion on).  The pilot, though, is a random hodge-podge of leering and “rules,” plus stuff with Fiona Gubelmann, who you know I love, but who won’t have anything to do going forward.  So… Whatever. Desire To Watch Again: One more episode.  Period.  When it turns out that it’s yet another “The guys try to fix Carter up on a date” snooze, I’ll be done, even though this is a time slot in which I notoriously give shows too many chances.