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The Searchlight

The Awakening of a First-Year Teacher



I've always been a rule-follower.  In fact, I study the rules and the laws because without them society would fall apart. 



Take for example the current educational system in North Carolina.  Now, I can't speak for other states, nor can I speak for all school districts.  However, I can confidently speak about all the school districts I covered in a past life as an award-winning investigative reporter.  I can also speak about the schools my own children have attended and the one that will more than likely not renew my contract next year. 



Having been skeptical of public education after chronicling many of the issues or problems in school districts as a reporter, I decided to become part of the solution.  I would be the teacher who believed in the children who were falling through the cracks - the underdogs.  I decided if I wanted things to change.  I could not sit back and do nothing.  I'd become an insider. 



Unfortunately though, like many students, I am the square peg that doesn't fit in the circular hole.  And it only took two weeks for me to figure that out. 



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2018-Jul-23 More... You see teachers who provide lessons on the same subjects meet once a week to decide what, according to Common Core, we should teach.  This means that though you may think the classes should be taught the classics, such as Shakespeare or learn poetry by reading Emily Dickinson, you would be mistaken.  Unfortunately for me, I was the sole teacher who asked why we were teaching poetry through a poem by Tupac Shakur rather than Dickinson.  The answer I received was, "We must meet the students where they are and include their interests." 



Seriously, I had to teach 30 students how to interpret Shakur.  While they were in high school and the poem was approximately 10 lines, very few students understood the meaning of a poem by a rapper.  See, while my students are in high school, many read at around a third grade level.  Some even are on a kindergarten level.  Any reasonable person would think these students would not be pushed through the system until certain criteria are met, such as being able to reading.  But that assumption would be wrong. 



I teach at a "low wealth" school with a dismal graduation rate.  So, after the first round of grades, I was told no student can make below a 50.  I'm not kidding.  So, though I had students on my rolls who seldom attended class or passed a test, they all received at least a 50.  Apparently, it was some sort of "positive reinforcement" for the students.  A way to say the school believes in you, Johnny.  We believe that even though you seldom attended class, and failed your tests, you will receive a 50 instead of the 30 you actually earned. 



I thought my head would explode when I was told in no uncertain terms by an assistant principal to change my grades.  All I could think was how unethical this was and how we were falsifying documents that are received by the state.  How is this legal? 



My students--who I held to a high standard and accountable--were failing at a higher number than most other teachers who already knew the expectations.  So, guess who is blamed when a student doesn't do well, even if you have never even met said student?  The teacher, of course.  So, during my first semester of my first year of teaching, I am admonished by an assistant principal who says, "If you have students failing, you need to reexamine your teaching methods." 



So, I'm guessing I just didn't get to them through Tupac.  While I don't disagree with the sentiment that students should be given every opportunity to succeed, I also know there's no way a kindergarten-level reader who cannot decipher the lyrics of a rap song should absolutely be promoted when the student has only a rudimentary understanding of the English language.  However, I am told in no uncertain terms, each child should pass. 



I was treated to a three-on-one meeting with two assistant principals and the principal where I politely told them it was unethical to change students' grades and I would not play along.  I was told sternly, "Everyone should pass."  I finally had enough by this point. 



I poignantly asked how much money was tied to the graduation rate because if I passed students along and the rate increased, I believed financial strings were attached.  And the answer to my question was basically, "Who do you think you are?  You know nothing."  That's when the red flag was raised once again. 



One of the worst positions I never thought I would experience occurred when one of my students told me he was considering suicide.  Since I had another teacher in the room, I walked the student down to the guidance counselor myself.  I couldn't take the chance that he may ditch school if he walked alone.  Later in the day, I was met by another assistant principal (seriously, how many do we need?)  who reprimanded me for leaving my students with another teacher.  Then, she went on to berate me about his threat not being serious.  According to her, the student was "playing me."  For what, I still don't know.  What I do know is that I would do the same thing again and would never treat a suicide threat as a joke.  For some reason, I just never imagined as an educator I would be in the principal's office in trouble for doing what I believed was right. 



Basically, I was told to illegally falsify records; ignore suicide threats, and to keep my mouth shut. 



In my former job, if I had no integrity, I had no job.  And yet here I am  stuck--because of that same integrity. 



I wonder what parents would think about this situation?  What would Betsy DeVos do or how would the Board of Education react?  Would anyone care these students we are sending out into the world are functionally illiterate? 



I've had people in my own family tell me to do my job and keep quiet.  After all, I need a job.  Unfortunately, keeping quiet is not my style. 



Maybe in another column I can tell you about the retaliation stage of this job I have grown to love and hate.  The students are the saving grace.  They are why I am there and I refuse to dumb down my lessons just so the school can brag about its grade or graduation rate.  Of course, there are no laws protecting whistleblowers in this state so for now I must remain anonymous.  Therefore, I cannot publish my name just yet.  But I have a feeling since I have already been labeled as a troublemaker that may change soon.  I've always been a rule-follower.  In fact, I study the rules and the laws because without them society would fall apart. Take for example the current educational system in North Carolina.  Now, I can't speak for other states, nor can I speak for all school districts.  However, I can confidently speak about all the school districts I covered in a past life as an award-winning investigative reporter.  I can also speak about the schools my own children have attended and the one that will more than likely not renew my contract next year. Having been skeptical of public education after chronicling many of the issues or problems in school districts as a reporter, I decided to become part of the solution.  I would be the teacher who believed in the children who were falling through the cracks - the underdogs.  I decided if I wanted things to change.  I could not sit back and do nothing.  I'd become an insider. Unfortunately though, like many students, I am the square peg that doesn't fit in the circular hole.  And it only took two weeks for me to figure that out. You see teachers who provide lessons on the same subjects meet once a week to decide what, according to Common Core, we should teach.  This means that though you may think the classes should be taught the classics, such as Shakespeare or learn poetry by reading Emily Dickinson, you would be mistaken.  Unfortunately for me, I was the sole teacher who asked why we were teaching poetry through a poem by Tupac Shakur rather than Dickinson.  The answer I received was, "We must meet the students where they are and include their interests. "Seriously, I had to teach 30 students how to interpret Shakur.  While they were in high school and the poem was approximately 10 lines, very few students understood the meaning of a poem by a rapper.  See, while my students are in high school, many read at around a third grade level.  Some even are on a kindergarten level.  Any reasonable person would think these students would not be pushed through the system until certain criteria are met, such as being able to reading.  But that assumption would be wrong. I teach at a "low wealth" school with a dismal graduation rate.  So, after the first round of grades, I was told no student can make below a 50.  I'm not kidding.  So, though I had students on my rolls who seldom attended class or passed a test, they all received at least a 50.  Apparently, it was some sort of "positive reinforcement" for the students.  A way to say the school believes in you, Johnny.  We believe that even though you seldom attended class, and failed your tests, you will receive a 50 instead of the 30 you actually earned. I thought my head would explode when I was told in no uncertain terms by an assistant principal to change my grades.  All I could think was how unethical this was and how we were falsifying documents that are received by the state.  How is this legal?My students--who I held to a high standard and accountable--were failing at a higher number than most other teachers who already knew the expectations.  So, guess who is blamed when a student doesn't do well, even if you have never even met said student?  The teacher, of course.  So, during my first semester of my first year of teaching, I am admonished by an assistant principal who says, "If you have students failing, you need to reexamine your teaching methods. "So, I'm guessing I just didn't get to them through Tupac.  While I don't disagree with the sentiment that students should be given every opportunity to succeed, I also know there's no way a kindergarten-level reader who cannot decipher the lyrics of a rap song should absolutely be promoted when the student has only a rudimentary understanding of the English language.  However, I am told in no uncertain terms, each child should pass. I was treated to a three-on-one meeting with two assistant principals and the principal where I politely told them it was unethical to change students' grades and I would not play along.  I was told sternly, "Everyone should pass."  I finally had enough by this point. I poignantly asked how much money was tied to the graduation rate because if I passed students along and the rate increased, I believed financial strings were attached.  And the answer to my question was basically, "Who do you think you are?  You know nothing."  That's when the red flag was raised once again. One of the worst positions I never thought I would experience occurred when one of my students told me he was considering suicide.  Since I had another teacher in the room, I walked the student down to the guidance counselor myself.  I couldn't take the chance that he may ditch school if he walked alone.  Later in the day, I was met by another assistant principal (seriously, how many do we need?)  who reprimanded me for leaving my students with another teacher.  Then, she went on to berate me about his threat not being serious.  According to her, the student was "playing me."  For what, I still don't know.  What I do know is that I would do the same thing again and would never treat a suicide threat as a joke.  For some reason, I just never imagined as an educator I would be in the principal's office in trouble for doing what I believed was right. Basically, I was told to illegally falsify records; ignore suicide threats, and to keep my mouth shut. In my former job, if I had no integrity, I had no job.  And yet here I am  stuck--because of that same integrity. I wonder what parents would think about this situation?  What would Betsy DeVos do or how would the Board of Education react?  Would anyone care these students we are sending out into the world are functionally illiterate?I've had people in my own family tell me to do my job and keep quiet.  After all, I need a job.  Unfortunately, keeping quiet is not my style. Maybe in another column I can tell you about the retaliation stage of this job I have grown to love and hate.  The students are the saving grace.  They are why I am there and I refuse to dumb down my lessons just so the school can brag about its grade or graduation rate.  Of course, there are no laws protecting whistleblowers in this state so for now I must remain anonymous.  Therefore, I cannot publish my name just yet.  But I have a feeling since I have already been labeled as a troublemaker that may change soon. 

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