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t3_1ytfy2 | relationships | Me [19F] with my FWB [18M] might have started to resent me due to unforeseen circumstances? | Met my FWB through some mutual friends about two months ago, we hit it off really well but due to this, those mutual friendships deteriorated due to jealousy [they wanted me, but hadn't told me anything. I thought we were all just bros.] We used to talk almost 24/7, and I felt myself getting attached so I mentioned the rate of talking with him, ever since then we've slowly started to drift apart. Well, the other day he had gotten into a fist fight, I was asleep and he tried calling me but my phone was on silent. He really needed me and I wasn't there.
I feel bad and ever since then he hasn't talked to me, I don't know if it's because he's slowly starting to resent me, if he's angry at me for some reason. I've apologized and really want to make it up to him but it seems as though he doesn't want to talk. I haven't really tried to talk to him, since the last text I sent to him was, "Are you feeling okay?" with no response. I just really need some advice on how to handle this situation. So far I've avoided blowing up his phone, really haven't put a lot of effort into our friendship.
Some extra details: I do care about him deeply and I would like our friendship to continue, even if the benefits do not. I feel like I let him down and it's been bugging me. | Missed important phone call, now he won't talk to me. Feel bad, what do I do? |
t3_481ddk | relationships | Me [23M] with my gf [20F] of 2 years are about to enter a long distance relationship. | So I met her 3 years ago on an 12-month internship I was doing over in UK. She had just went to visit some of her relatives and earn some money.
After summer was over, she went back to her country for university. I stayed and we started chatting. a lot. Flash forward 9 months later and I was flying to her so we can go out on a second date.
either love or infatuation, doesn't matter. I've fallen for her. I'm 21 at this point and this is the first time in my life I've had relationship with a girl that lasts longer than couple of weeks.
Anyway, I had 3 more semesters left in my 4.5 year degree, so I transfered to an university in her town. It's definitely an inferior university, and I do feel a sense of regret when I reflect on my choice, but at least I was together with her.
The thing is, I'm finally graduating in June and will be going on to pursue my masters in a different country, but she has 2 more years to go.
Realistically, with some difficulty I will be able to visit her once a month for 3 days.
I'm really wrestling with this thing - should I just break up or try to do long-distance for 2-3 years?
I'm pretty handsome and athlethic. I don't have 'oneitis' and know that I could find another one easily if I wanted, but I do love my current girlfriend
At the moment we have been living together for about 9months (like moved in)
I've tried to have this conversation with my girlfriend, but it usually gets emotional and derailed, so we've settled for ignoring the elephant in the room at the moment. | I'm about to finish my studies and move to a different country. Should I try the long distance thing for 2-3 years (9-10months long distance, posibly 2 months together in a year) with visiting her once a month or just break up and deal with it? |
t3_2076bt | relationships | I [21 M] was seeing a girl [21 F] a few months back, stopped meeting after a few dates but recently saw her again and I want to try it again. | So I was seeing this girl a few months back and everything was going great. Then came the winter holidays and didn't really talk to her at all over the Christmas period and I sort of stopped fancying her. Was thinking of calling it off but thought it'd be a bit harsh given the time and didn't want it to be awkward for the NYE party we were both going to, which we ended up together at by the end of the night anyway. Since then, we haven't texted or messaged one another, sort of mutually although I feel like the ball was in my side of the court. Fine, worked out well in the end. Forgot about her.
Have been very busy with work so not much time to do anything anyway but saw her today and it brought back a whole host of feelings and I'm not sure how to play it. Definitely would like to rekindle the flame but a) I don't know how she'll react, don't want to come off as using her as we run in similar circles and I don't want to embarrass her and b) I'm worried I'll do the exact same thing and suddenly stop fancying her. | Was seeing a girl a few months ago, left it when I stopped fancying her but saw her recently and I think I still do. How do I play it? |
t3_2w11bj | relationships | Me [27M], needs some dating advice badly after recovering from illness | I decided to post after reading some articles and seeing some pretty good advice. Will try to make this as concise as possible. My first time on here so I hope I write this well enough.
Was in a 3yr relationship with a pretty amazing girl, but I developed a severe illness towards the end of it(kinda think it caused the relationship to end along with her moving to another state for work). I had to move back home with my mom and later my grandparents because I couldn't take care of myself (even going to the restroom was extremely painful).
Well anyway, I am on the path to recovery and I have been using this time to improve myself. The doctor's finally figured out what was wrong after about a year and put me on the right meds. So I started working out again and going back to school for a second degree. Everything is pretty good, but I want some companionship. I miss that feeling I guess. I get nervous when I try to approach girls because of my illness and complications it has caused. Like I have to stay with my grandparents and I don't have a job yet because I wasn't able to work for so long (I am looking though). These aren't the most attractive features in a guy my age.
I was just wondering if there is any advice out there that could help me out a bit. | Recovering from severe illness and rebuilding my life. Would like some dating advice. |
t3_gfp7y | AskReddit | Unmotivated At Work: The Cubicle Cliché | This is me browsing reddit at work again, as most of us do. This is, and has always been common practice to all of us dweller of the cube farms. I'm the stereotypical guy who works for a big corporation that doesn't give a shit about you, in turn, causing you not to give a shit about it.
My predicament is as follows.
**I want to care.**
I used to like my job, but recently there have alot of changes as most companies come across. Jobs become more specialized, you have responsibility taken away from you and given to the most specific departments that do just that one thing. Now lets keep one thing in mind here... im not complaining about working, i know i am very fortunate to even have a job. i just feel that my lack of commitment will eventually lead to my demise, being fired.
Now, i went from a fun, technical, ever changing job, to a stale, copy&paste reporting monkey job in just a year. Its become exactly like on office space where he explains a given work week, filled with simply spacing out and barely doing anything. The tasks i do have are never ending, treadmill type tasks, so at the end of the week accomplishments reports are filled with the same 6 bullets followed by "Onging".
What are some things you guys do to help yourselves through the day, to be productive and feel like you contribute (if there is anything).
I don't expect this thread to actually go anywhere, but i feel like i need help from those i relate to the most. | I used to like my job, now not so much. Need help to stay motivated and actually do work so i don't get fired for being shit. |
t3_1uozol | relationships | Am I (22M) setting my standards too high moving forward? | My recent past: Just got out of a 2 year relationship in which I was completely happy with someone for the most part but we broke up due to issues with our sex life, our beliefs, and other minor details.
Current situation: 5 months single and in my 4th year of college. I have 3 semesters to go (double major) and then I'd like to move to a different state. I spend a lot of my time with school/internships/clubs and my social life is extremely limited.
Moving forward: I'd like a girl with the same libido, is relatively attractive, has a similar level of education, we enjoy our time together (usual stuff), we have similar views (religion, politics, etc), and does not watch reality TV (a stretch im sure). | I want an intellectual girl with similar interests who loves sex and prefers her mind over her emotions |
t3_330ea4 | tifu | TIFU by buying a wooden toilet seat | So I was on the toilet taking a shit, when I noticed a small white bug on my leg. I thought no big deal, since I live in Australia, and bugs in the toilet are normal, but then I saw some more on my leg. Then I was like oh shit. I then began to feel them crawl around my body and near by butthole, and it was at that moment my toilet seat broke. I had multiple splinters in my ass and there was a fair amount of blood. I called over my girlfriend who had this simultaneous look of amusement and shock, due to the blood everywhere and the fact that my ass had fallen into the toilet and it was touching my shit. She called an ambulance out of panic, and I had to stay in the hospital for the next 2 days while they stitched my ass. I also had fun explaining to them what happened. | Now I know I have termites |
t3_18xe9f | relationships | Girlfriend [22] might be hiding something and my friend is worried about me [22]. (How) should I bring this up with her? | My girlfriend (A) and I have been "officially" dating for about a month now. Out of the blue, I get a call from an old friend (B) who is pretty close to her. He told me that she's been hiding some things that have happened in the past four months (he wouldn't give me details) and that he was really worried about me getting hurt sometime down the road.
Should I bring this up with A? If so, how? We can only see each other on the weekends, and I was thinking of bringing it up towards the end of our next date. I wouldn't go into too much detail. I'd just tell her that B is worried about me and ask her if I should be worried. I don't want to scare A off, but at the same time I don't want to betray the trust between A and B (B was one of my best friends growing up and has been dating A's best friend for four years now). | Friend knows something about my girlfriend and he's worried it will cause trouble between my girlfriend and I. Should I bring this up with her and if so, how? |
t3_1q4kpt | relationships | Long-term planning for me [28F] and my fiance [27M]. How do you care for family, etc. | Hi all,
I'm looking for some advice on how to negotiate long-term life decisions with two partners from two different countries. I am from Canada, he is from Scotland. We are planning on getting married, not sure when/we aren't in a rush. However, we both are wondering on how other couples with family in two countries manage things like caring for sick relatives, visiting home, making decisions about elderly parents.
Both my partner and I have discussed our wishes for our parents to have good care in their later years. We both are open to caring for our parents if feasible in our own home or nearby. However, we don't want to 'abandon' a set of parents across an ocean... Have other couples encountered this? How did you manage it? Bear in mind that at this point, it's all conjecture really - both our sets of parents are still working and will be for the next 5 years or so. | How does a couple from two different countries handle long-term family decisions such as elder care, etc.? |
t3_h6h0a | dating_advice | Possibly very little in common, what else can we talk about?! | So there's this guy I'm into he's a 19, I'm 21.
Anyway, I finally got around to asking him to hang out. He said yes. (Yay!!) But we're friends on facebook and judging from his posts and profile, I get the impression that our interests don't overlap as much as they could. We're hanging out for the first time tomorrow and it'll be just the two of us.
I'm totally into learning more about his interests, as in I'd be willing to become more into them with exposure over time, but I'm afraid that I'll ask him about what he's into tomorrow and then not have any common ground to make more conversation out of. I wont know any of the bands he listens to, I wont know any of the films/shows he'll talk about. I'm artsy, but he's more into visual art and I'm on the performance side so I know very little about that as well. Will it be okay if I'm just ignorant and asking him questions about these things the whole time?
What else can we talk about? There has to be something else...
Help please, I'm really interested in getting to know him as he seems really awesome, but as our immediately obvious interests don't extend beyond my willingness to learn more about his, I'm afraid we'll quickly run out of material. I don't want this to fail. | guy I'm into is basically a hipster. I know very little (read:nothing) about most of the things I think might be important to him. We're hanging out tomorrow and idk what to talk about. Suggestions please!! |
t3_2zac64 | tifu | Tifu by trusting wasp-bro | So, today I decided to clean my car. Everything was going good and then all of the sudden a wasp landed near me. We made eye contact, it was a beautiful experience. I said, "what's up wasp-bro you aren't going to sting me are you?" At that moment the wasp-bro's little head nodded up and down. We became one. I carried on cleaning my car and paid him no mind. It was at that time in space he decided to break our bond of brothership. I felt the soft touch of his legs land on my the nape of my neck and then what followed, his fiery sting. I scrame and crushed him beneath my hand. | Don't fucking trust wasps |
t3_4qazoz | relationships | My girlfriend [25F] might get a job in another city and I [26M] am thinking to follow her | Hello r/relationships,
I will try to be short. My girlfriend [25F] has an interview for a job in another city, let's called it C because it is the third city in our equation. I [26M] am from city A where I live but I work all week in city B. She is also from city B, and that's why have a common ground. (the distances are not big deal but the working schedule is hell).
Now she might get the job in city C and probably move there too.
Obviously, I want to follow her. What is your opinion on that?
You see, to get any other job for me in any town is easy. But there are no opportunities for the field I work in any city. So it is hard to move but not impossible.
The thing is that I don't want to lose her for anything. It will be a huge step to follow her, for both of us. We are together almost a year and she is everything for me (yeah I know, a cliche phrase but I never had anything before her. So now, I have everything).
Following her, basically means for me going to ground zero in my career but also taking my life completely on my hands and exploring alternatives.
Not following her, means losing her.
She knows that I am most likely to follow her but she won't demand it.
Also, I have no one to ask these things...
Thanks everyone in advance for the time you spend on this post! | Girlfriend is about to get a job in a different city and I am thinking to follow her. Opinions? |
t3_2r38a8 | relationships | How to transition to kissing/making out from sitting on the couch/grass/bed/at the movies etc for the first time? [18, Male] | This is something I've always wanted to know. To clarify, I've been in a situation a few times, and probably will be in the future, where there's an obvious chemistry between us. For example, we were sitting on a couch/sofa quite close, thigh to thigh, alone, watching TV and chatting, under a blanket. We were close friends, and talked about a lot. If I shuffled to get comfortable/got up to get something, she'd always move closer again. (in hindsight, it seems that she liked me in that way, but I wasn't aware at the time).
So with all this in mind, and assuming that the signals are there in future situations,what would be the best way to transition to kissing/making out? Any advice would be greatly appreciated, and if you have a story of how you did it, that'd be really helpful
Many thanks! | What's the best method to start kissing someone when sitting together |
t3_1xls08 | relationships | I'm 21, virgin, a girl[20] wants to have sex with me, but I'm not interested, should I just go for it for the sake of it or keep waiting for the right person? | Me: 21, male, virgin, rather shy.
Girl 1: Wants to sex me, know her for two weeks, she's what I believe most guys want, she's tall, blonde, killer body, etc.
Girl 2: I like her, we've gone out a few times with mutual friends, we have stuff in common, known her for a year, and she's always on my mind for some reason.
My dilemma is the following:
I'm a shy guy, like, really shy, I used to be worse but I worked on it.
I've been meaning to ask girl 2 out just us for ages, but I'm just too scared to do it.
In a way girl 1 might give me the push I need to be less shy, and I need a very big push, but I'd really rather wait for the right person, but I'm way too timid to pursue someone, so that person might never come.
Should I just politely decline girl 1 and keep pursuing girl 2, even though I'll probably never get the balls to get anywhere?
I've always imagined my first time to be with someone special, but my friends say I'm delusional and should just go for it with girl 1, it isn't the first time a situation like this has happened, so they are starting to think I'm gay, I don't really care though.
I'm meeting girl 1 later today, and she'll probably make the first move, I thought of just telling her what I told you, tell her I've never done this before, and there's someone I like so I feel bad doing it, no idea what her reaction might be. | girl wants to sex me, but I kind of like someone else so I don't want to. |
t3_y9j7h | AskReddit | What's your oddest self-aware dream moment? | I'll go first:
Having a "back in highschool" dream. Talking to a classmate.
Me: "I'm back here because after I got accepted into college, I failed a few classes. One of them was PhysEd (who cares?), but the other two were English and Calculus II. I wanted to come back after getting my undergrad degree to see if I could pass them. The principal though it was funny, and wanted to see what would happen."
Mate: "That seems like a weird way to waste your time."
Me: "Yeah, I thought I'd stop having this dream after a year or two. But now I'm 31, and here I am, same old dream. You'll probably have it too after you've graduated."
Mate: "No I won't, you idiot. I'll be gone as soon as you wake up!" | Dream friend gets indignant when I try to tell him about his future. |
t3_45m2ov | relationships | I [19M] don't know if I should still pursue her [18F] | It's been complicated. I haven't been in a real relationship yet so I'm not sure if this is normal for me or of it's normal in general. I met this girl around in November and took her out to the movies and then to eat. At the time, it seemed like she really liked me and I really liked her. We texted many times and would always end our nights with a text.
However, things became slightly off when she stopped texting me during our Winter break. I've known of her past and would dare say that she is kind of a hoe. When winter break was over, we started texting and talking again but it wasn't really 'real'. I always felt that whenever she texts me or sends me a snapchat, there was another guy she was talking to.
My question is, should I still be talking to her? I feel like I'm at this point where I'm the one initiating conversations and what not. I know she's not busy since she's still active on social media and I really have this gut feeling that there's someone else she talks to, so I'm not sure if I should still pursue her | Girl I like is possibly talking to someone else. Should I keep talking to her? |
t3_cbadn | relationship_advice | Crazy ex is causing trouble. | So a while back now, I broke it off with her after 3 years of what I thought was a good relationship, she Cheated on my with my "best friend" numerous times so I got out of there.
She's was a wreck and resorted to cutting herself and all the rest.
so 4 months down the road, I've moved on with a wonderful woman whom makes me happier than she ever did. (so I've been told many times.)
The problem here is, my ex is still staring at me every chance she gets and trying to make my life a misery.
She's currently seeing someone who is in a local gang (his role within the gang is to kill the pets of those who owe the gang money)
Now they've both cheated on eachother and have decided to make it an "open" relationship.
she's sleeping around like there is no tomorrow and I know for a fact that she's sleeping with 3 different guys on a regular basis.
it doesn't end there though
She's told all these guys that I've completely screwed her over and today me and my girlfriend were followed home, supposedly to "beat me up"
Now this scares the shit out of me because, I'm not a fighter, but I will I have to and I don't want my girlfriend getting involved with all this shit.
On top of that, I'm worried the boyfriend will try and get to me through my family or pets.
What should I do reddit? | Crazy ex is trying to get me killed. |
t3_1pcley | personalfinance | Should we adjust our high student loan repayments while my wife stays home with the kids? | My wife and I both have pretty large amounts of student loans ($72,000 for my PhD, $83,000 for her 2 Master's), which are all Federal Direct Stafford Loans. The payments on these loans together will come to around $1,780/month, once I am out of deferment (I just finished school a couple months ago).
My income is $100,000/year, which comes out to around $2,950/biweekly after all taxes and insurance. I also have the potential to get an incentive bonus of $8,000/year, depending on my performance and the performance of my company. Budgeting as best we can for rent, car, phones, utilities, groceries, and other routine expenses come out to around $3,000/month. It does not cover things like trips, car repair, and other incidental expenses.
We have around $10,000 in savings, but half of that is owed to my parents over the next few months (interest free loan to help us move to my new job location).
The issue is that my wife is currently pregnant with our first (any day now) and therefore decided not to continue her position as a teacher at the end of last school year (which paid around $43,000/year). Our plan is to have her stay home with our child until he and any subsequent children are old enough to attend full day preschool.
Since we would like 1-2 more, this will mean that she will not be working for the next 6-8 years. With her working, the student loan payments would not be a huge issue, but with only my income, they seriously cut down on what is left after routine and incidental expenses.
We have the option to get either reduced or graduated payments, which would lower our combined repayment to around $900-1000 a month. Our thoughts were to do this for the time being and then accelerate our payments once she returns to work. Is this a good idea? | Wife staying home for the next 6-8 years, should I reduce our student loan repayments for that period to give us more breathing room? |
t3_26cx12 | legaladvice | Caught shoplifting, kind of. Need advice. | Ok, so I got caught by a loss prevention employee putting something in my bag. He followed me out and like an idiot, I get in my car and drive off.... so he looks up my plate and calls the police, they find my address from the license and show up at my house a few hours later.
I said that I placed the item back on the shelf in the store, and they asked me about it/ searched me as relayed that info to the guy at the store. They seem to accept that story.
So, I have a court date and the item was valued at $30 (it was actually worth much less but I didn't bring that up) the police felt sorry for me and said I'd probably just get restitution or probation because I "had no former offenses"
So, here's the problem. I have not one but two former offenses from about 5 years ago in another state. I'm worried they'll find it and crack down on me. Five years ago I would have been fine going to jail but now I can't I am taking care of a sick relative, I am in school and it will mess up my grades and loan, it will disgrace me (I am too old for it to be remotely cute anymore) but really I am most worried about my sick relative... it's a heartbreaking story and I feel like if they found out, well, it would just be bad.
Anyway, can someone please advise on what to do at the court date? I am officially accused of shoplifting by "concealing with intent" however I am maintaining that I placed the item back and left
Please help! | shoplifted, need advice (NJ) |
t3_2bzh12 | relationships | How do I [19F] get my boyfriend [21M] of 4 months to feel more attractive? | (Throwaway account)
My boyfriend and I have been official for almost 4 months, but have been close friends for the past year (it was a pretty seamless friends -> friends with benefits -> relationship transition). He is very, very attractive. I say this not only because I love him and of course I would think that, but also simply in general. He's just a seriously good-looking person and many other people have agreed with me.
He doesn't seem to see it though. He tells me that he believes I find him attractive, but doesn't necessarily agree or think he is all that great looking. He has good self-esteem in general, but I just sincerely want him to find himself as attractive as other people find him. I tell him how hot he is and mention specific things I find attractive about him. I'm wondering if there is anything else I could do or say to help this. | Boyfriend doesn't think of himself as very attractive - how do I get him to see himself the way I see him? |
t3_lg0v5 | AskReddit | If you tax them, they will go. | America's corporate tax rate is second highest in the world (second only to Japan). If I owned a corporation I would have to face the reality that there is no incentive to operate in America, although I love the country, and would want to employ my fellow Americans. Unfortunately from an accounting standpoint I would have to seriously consider taking my business, and the jobs elsewhere. Taxes aren't the answer. You can't raise taxes enough to pay back the debt. It's a done deal, the Dollar is dead. The problem is the debt which there is no way to pay back. The IMF has issued a call to leave the Dollar and start a new global currency called the Bancor. If the dollar were to fall from reserve currency status, it's value would drop precipitously, making food, and oil much more expensive. Interest rates would rise and prevent bank lending for fear of lending money which would not be worth as much re-paid as when it was lent. Which is exactly how all the countries which own our treasury bonds feel. They bought a bond which when mature will be worth less than what they spent on it to begin with. They have no logical choice but to accept their losses and abandon the Dollar. All this means is; if you are holding dollars when the world begins to reject them, they will cease to be worth much. Put your money into a gold ETF or physical gold in an account located in a stable country with lots of hard assets (Dubai). Sell gold puts far out of the money, or if you can't invest learn to live without money and oil based energy. | There is no way to save the economy. We are headed for a replacement for the Dollar. A global currency. No amount of taxing, or protesting will stop the inevitable. Start putting any money you can spare in precious metal derivatives in stable foreign countries, (Preferably countries with large reserves of gold, or oil.) or learn to live without money. |
t3_1ji4ql | relationships | My [21/M] girlfriend [21/F] constantly looks through my phone while I'm asleep. Time to end it? | So my girlfriend and I have been getting along great our entire relationship. My family loves her, her family loves me, and we usually got along great.
However, she always goes through my phone while I am asleep at her house. It started before we were even official, and she woke me up at 5 in the morning crying about a text between me and a girl who I had grown up with. It was just a casual conversation between me and her, nothing that could be construed as flirtatious.
Mind you, I've never even thought about cheating on her, the messages she freaks out and cries about are me and my friends who happen to be girls just talking. Nothing flirtatious at all.
A year later, I can count 6 occasions where she has gone through my phone (and I've found out about it). I have caught her twice as I've come back from the bathroom, the other 4 times have been when I was asleep. When I tried putting a passcode on my phone, she asked why I did it and she accused me of trying to hide something. She was able to find out my password by looking over my shoulder one day, so I got rid of the password altogether. She has a password on her phone, but I have seen her type it in enough that I know what it is. Never have looked through it.
She has looked through my Snapchat history, Twitter favorites ("WHY WOULD YOU FAVORITE THAT GIRL'S TWEET!?!"), texts, Facebook messages, if you can think of it she's gone through it.
I used to think it wasn't that big of a deal and that it was "normal" (this is my first serious girlfriend ever) until I mentioned it to my guy friends, who immediately were taken aback and said how messed up it was.
What do you think...I've already talked to her about it and she's said she will stop, but she **never does**. Is it time to end it? | Girlfriend constantly goes through my phone while I'm asleep, makes wild assumptions that I'm cheating on her, and starts fights over things that aren't there. Is it time to drop this relationship? |
t3_2n825b | relationships | I [17 M] don't know how to start a relationship with a girl [16 F] | Well, a little context first, I've been in love/attracted plenty of times over my life, but never I've been able to be with a girl. I've been rejecter every time.
This time the girl (let's call her Caterine) I have a crush on appeared in my life 6 months ago. I met her or a classical concert I went with some of my friend, she was a close friend of one of them so we chat a little bit. I was instantly attracted to her.
2 Months later and 3 more concerts I managed to grow a pair large enough to invite her to a date (as friends, I didn't imply that I liked her that moment) so we could learn more about her.
I was charmed even more by her, she was funny, intellectual, cute, we had a lot in common, same vision of the world, same sense of humour, etc.
We saw each other 2 or 3 more times and we started chatting over the internet, well I've been using the internet for a long time so I'm pretty nerdy in some aspects so I tried not to show that part of me to her, as it turns out she is as nerdy as me.
We could talk about everything, from philosophy to things worthy of being in /b/ (just not that fucked up).
So I like her. A lot. But like always I took my long ass time in knowing her so I'm kinda friendzoned now. Things are starting to look like all previous times. I have for a given that if I express my feeling towards her now I'll be rejected.
I'm fed up of being rejected.
I don't know what to do. How do I start a relationship with her?, if I do nothing she could met another guy and start dating him.. (it has happen to me before and it's horrendous). I don't want to be a friend anymore.
Thank you for reading. | Been rejected countless times, Really like this girl, Afraid of expressing my feelings, don't know how to do it. (English isn't my main language so I'm sorry for any grammatical errors ) |
t3_2lvgsj | loseit | Someone told me a very demotivating thing today, I'm here to find out if it's true. | I'm 17, male, weigh 89 kg. Started at 102, I lost these 13 kg by walking, going to sleep significantly earlier (getting 9 hours of sleep a day), and eating one meal a day when I get home from school. Now I was told that if I just lose fat and don't build muscle, everything I eat that has a high % of fat, will turn to fat, and that if I want to remain in the weight I aim to achieve (which is 80 kg I think), I have to develop muscle.
How true is this? I know the last thing the human body is is black and white, but still, is it a necessity to develop muscles? Because if it is I really don't think I'm going to even try. I have no money for a gym and no time. I really hate doing it at home and honestly it's something that would make me reconsider. Because by walking 6 km three times a week* (edited, accidentally typed 6 km a day..) and not eating I'm basically doing nothing and losing weight. It's a win-win. | Is it true that if you lose weight you have to build muscle in order to remain in that weight, and that if you don't, anything with a high % of fat will instantly turn to fat in your body and you'll get fat fast? |
t3_2b38qp | weddingplanning | I didn't know choosing a dress would be so hard! [Dilemma] | I went shopping for dresses for the first time today. The first place where I had an appointment was kind of a bust, so my bridesmaid and I went to David's Bridal as a walk-in just to look around. The third dress I tried on I LOVED even though it was different than what I had in mind. It's more vinatge-y looking and both my bridesmaid and I agree it's more my personality than the other dresses.
But naive little me thought with a chain like David's Bridal, I could think about it for a month and wait until my MoH is in town to see it in person. The sales rep was making it seem like it might not be there if I don't buy now/soon. I don't know if she's just doing her job (trying to make sale/get commission) or being realistic or both. i would really like to shop around and have my MoH with me when I decide to buy. It's not that I even really have any doubts about the dress I just can't make such a split second decision. I did the same thing with my venue. I knew I absolutely loved the first place we saw, but we shopped around and gave it time to know we weren't rushing in, and ending up booking that first venue after all.
What should I do? Is the sales lady just being pushy? Can I wait a month or is it too risky? Also, I had $500 as my budget. The dress was $599 which I can live with, and I actually discovered it's on sale for $509 through July 22 (the day of my follow-up appointment). | Can I take a month to think about a dress or will it be gone by then? |
t3_189rk9 | tifu | TIFU: by parking my car. | Last night I went to a bar with some friends. It was "Penny Pitchers" AKA really cheap beer for college students. I was tired and didn't feel like being out late so I drove there with the intention of driving home later.
After an hour or so, one of my buddies convinced me to stay out longer and said the parking lot was 24 hour parking on weekends so I didn't have to worry about leaving it there all night. I obliged.
Now, after a LOT of drinks and several hours later, I am obliterated. I stumble to my friend's house after some pizza and pass out. The next morning my friend drove me back to the lot to get my car; but it wasn't there. Oh, by the way, because I parked right next to the bar, I left everything in it including coat, purse and wallet with debit cards.
Like magic, a sign that I swear wasn't there last night appeared, mocking me and chanting "parking until 7am." I called the tow company that was advertised below the tormenting sign and learned they had my car. My angel of a roommate drove me to the lot in the middle of ghetto downtown. Since I left everything in my car the night before I had to retrieve my debit cards first, find a bank, take out $120 in cash, go back to the tow-yard, pay and get my baby back.
And THIS is the exact moment my hangover decides to kick in. Yep, I start yacking right in the parking lot of the tow company that took away my car. It was the lowest point in my college life.
I rush home, barely make it through the door before I start spewing again for the next 15 minutes. | Car got towed, threw up in lot, lowest point in life realized. |
t3_2l3iy0 | relationships | Me 20 f am happy my 3 year relationship is over (22 male)but can't get over feeling betraued | so I dated my ex for 3 years but we always fought, 3 months ago we broke up but still kept taking up until a month ago where I found out he was still sleeping with me and another girl.
I can honestly say that him being out of my life has been for the best im doing better in school and ive gotten a better job and I no longer fight with my family and I've become really fit.
he on the other hand lost his job and doesn't go to school and left me for some 18 year old girl. I know I am better off obviously but I can't get over the feeling of being betrayed. and I don't understand why I still love someone who didn't cause me anything but negativity in my life. we brought out the worst in eachother and I don't understand why im still grieving when he so easily moved on.
I go out and do hang out with friends and even gone on a lot of dates but nothing really seals the pain I feel. | horrible relationship finally over but still feel betrayed of the cheating and how he moved on so fast |
t3_hjftj | AskReddit | I feel like my dad is cheating me out of a large amount of money. What do? | I'm currently 17. I lived with my dad my entire life. My mom died in 2009 and I began receiving social security checks every month for about $600. In November (2010) part of our house burnt down and we got an insurance check for around $20,000.
Now, my dad is not a poor guy. He makes about $30 an hour full time, and has a girlfriend who works full time as well. However, he always tells me how "broke" he is, and how he can't afford anything. I think this is complete bull shit. He shops at the expensive grocery store, always eats out, and buys himself expensive toys like motorcycles. And he is not in any debt.
A few months ago I began to ask him about the social security check and the insurance money. He told me that he was able to take care of me financially (as in buying food, health insurance, etc.), but the only thing he can't afford is my car insurance. So basically, he's saying that the only part of my social security check that is being used on me is for car insurance. So where the hell is the rest of the $600 going? He doesn't even pay for my phone bill, gas, or clothes. This I have to pay for myself, even though I have no income. Actually, he did buy me a HALF tank of gas once. But his girlfriend told him not to do that anymore. I feel like she's in on this too.
As for the insurance money, we got the check in about January and I have not seen a cent of it. I believe I lost about $700 worth of stuff in the fire, and only one thing has been replaced. He agreed to buy me a new computer instead of giving me money, which I agreed to. NOW, he's saying I need to give him $300 and then he will buy me a computer.
Then my cat got sick. The bill was around $600 and now he's saying that I need to pay him. (My cat is still living with him, unfortunately.)
Our relationship has been particularly rocky lately. But | he hit me and I moved out (about a month and a half ago). I'm now living with my grandmother. I believe he gives her about $100-200 for food a month. |
t3_lwsux | running | How to train for a 10k in a short amount of time? | Taiwan is having a "Supao Marathon" in my city and some friends signed me up at the last minute. I tried to sign up for a 6k but I did not qualify.
So my problem is the 10k run is only 3 weeks away. I've done a lot of looking around for ways to train for a 10k. Most mention like 5-8 weeks of training.
I'm not a runner, I just want to finish the race. For myself. I'm 30 years old, a bit overweight, but not entirely out of shape. I play basketball every week, quite hard. Can anyone give me some tips on how to make this run go smoother?
Browsing /r/running has helped me know the basics of what i need, but I have no idea what running 10km actually feels like. | Only 3 weeks to train a super novice runner for a 10k, advice? |
t3_3ifpfp | tifu | TIFU By laying down in bed with the lights off | I usually sleep on my couch. In fact I haven't slept in my bed in over a month. Since there's nothing in my room that I use except for my bed (my closet is in an adjacent room before you get to the room my bed is in) I never really go into that room except to sleep.
Turns out my cat decided to shit on my bed sometime recently. As soon as I plop down on my bed I land on the pile of cat shit with it hitting almost square in the middle of my chest. It wasn't still warm, but it was still nice and soft and at least one tootsie roll sized chuck managed to stick to my chest as I lifted myself up. | Laid down in a pile of cat shit about twenty minutes ago. Welcome to my life. |
t3_2wlklb | relationships | My [25f] boyfriend [20m] makes manipulative jokes while high. He took it too far last night. | My [25f] boyfriend [20m] and I have been together since Halloween. He and I like to drink and get high every so often. Whenever he gets REALLY stoned, he makes jokes about wanting me to do something I'm not comfortable with. Normally petty things like singing along with him or saying something ridiculous.
Both of us have ADHD so our brains are wired similarly but I'm more of a silly drunk rather than someone who is like that high.
Last night he kept asking me to sing with him and I refused. I was high. I wanted to relax. He went on during 2 more songs saying, "If you love me, you'll sing it with me next time." I kept saying things like, "No." Or "Maybe if I feel like it." He was practically screaming at me to do it and pretended to cry. I tried to get up to take a piss and he held me down and said, "You want to pee, right?"
I had a drink or two at this point too and I get blunt but words weren't working so I laid there in silence for a minute. He then started to worry and called me pet names, but this point, I was really crying because all of my ex's were manipulative fucks. It always starts as a joke and then they know they have control over you. I won't allow myself to do that again.
He apologized a million times and I forgave him. He promised never to do it again. My question is, if he does, do I break up with him? Refuse to be around him when he smokes? Is that up to me? He's very insecure and realizes when he's at fault sober but he's so bad when he's stoned, he's a completely different person. I think my first course of action would to request he get high away from me and my next would be end the relationship.
Do any of you have suggestions? | Boyfriend begged me to play around with him while high. I like to relax when high. He kept saying "If you love me..." And "Just say you'll do it!" It was over a petty request. I started crying because I HATE manipulators. Help! |
t3_mr748 | AskReddit | Does writing a few papers on a band make you "obsessed"? | So far in my college career I have taken all of my humanities courses on the subject of music (they tend to interest me more than others). There are always research topics that we are allowed to choose. During my first semester, I did it on a band I pulled out of a hat (seriously, I just hit shuffle on iTunes and picked a topic concerning that band). The teacher loved it, so next semester I chose a different aspect of the same band where my previous research would have been irrelevant. This also net me a great grade. I have rinsed and repeated up until my final class which is next semester and I have become known as the local expert on that band by both faculty and students alike. They also believe me to be completely obsessed with that band. I beg to differ as I mainly did it for the grades (even though I did find a good chunk of the research very interesting). I think I'm not in the best position to be subjective on the topic, so I ask you Reddit: is this an obsession with a specific band? | I found out I was good at writing papers on a band that isn't my favourite band but I found it nets me the best grades. Does this make me obsessed with that band? |
t3_z8t6s | cats | I think our neighbours have left their cat? | We live in block of four flats and have new neighbours that are kinda "neighbours from hell". They are quite rough and noisy- you wouldn't mess with them...
They got a cat about a month ago, it's gorgeous but VERY chatty. They kept it on a lead for a while till it got used to our cat and now they let it out and about in the garden.
There has been a couple of times when he hasn't returned home and they have literally walked around the block BELLOWING for their cat which makes me think they at least kind of cared for it?
Anyway we haven't seen them since Thursday night- the house has been in darkness and the curtains drawn. On Saturday we found the cat asleep in a cardboard box in the green house in the garden (it has no windows) and he has been outside meowing since.
We fed him tonight and gave him some water. He is desperate to come inside with us but we keep stopping him.
I dont know if they have just gone away for a weekend or if they have just moved and left him. It breaks my heart to hear him outside (like I said he's very chatty and meows a lot!) but I don't want to take him in in case a) They come back and are all "WTF are you doing with my cat?" b) My cat *tolerates* him, I dont know if I can trust them together!
So I don't really know what to do, I guess I'm just here to rant/ask for advice? | Neighbours house is in darkness all weekend, cat is outside meowing and hungry |
t3_1ega4r | dating_advice | I'd really use an advice to "hit" a girl(16), who attends classes with me(16m).. | Hello
I'm a 16 teenager, I live in the country in Poland. I go to school with a girl I like(we're in the same class).
It's almost over of the school year, it's the last month, and I have a little crush on her. I haven't really been in a relationship yet, however my attempts to get a girl were random and TBH all of them ended as friendzones(huh).
My biggest problem is how to make an opportunity myself - I can't just go into front of her(or even start a facebook conversation) and tell that I really like her(I think she may like me back), or that she's pretty or something similar.. I'm a chicken when it comes to dating subjects...
What's more - I haven't been on a single date, even on a walk somewhere.
And again we don't live in the same place, but we reach the town(school) in 10km(me) and 20km(she) so it's even harder to me to even ask her for a walk...
So - is there any advice you can give me how I'd can start an eventual conversation and how subtly turn the subject into relationship questions?
___
^ | I don't know how to start a conversation with a girl in my class that I like(I'm shy) |
t3_sba08 | Pets | Reddit, tell me a story about one of your favorite pets. | A long time ago my family accidentally rescued 12 cockatiels. In those numbers they really do develop a hierarchal colony a lot like wolves (only smaller and more feathered). It was like a soap opera watching their personalities unfold.
We got one bird, PJ, who's wings had been cut back so far he couldn't fly anymore. He was slightly insane and immediately got demoted to Omega. They kicked him completely out of the group. So I raised him instead, teaching him to trust me and soon he was going everywhere with me. He practically lived on my shoulder.
Meanwhile Bird-dog and his forever mate Charlie were the alphas. After a few years we started sending the birds off to a good home. Soon, all we had left were PJ, Bird-dog, Charlie, and their child Aidan. During a storm Charlie got out and was never to be seen again. Bird-dog hit a steep depression for two years after that and really let himself go.
Meanwhile, PJ hooked up with his daughter Aiden and they by default became the alpha pair and PJ took his revenge, making Bird-dog his omega.
It's okay though, because Bird-dog and my dad became attached at the hi- foot and shoulder and he actually did have a happy life there at the end. | Alpha and Omegas switched places in a truly soap-opera like fashion. |
t3_333j6y | relationships | Me [27F] with my boyfriend [29 M] I got drunk and cheated and I don't know what to do | I met my boyfriend on OKCupid 6 months ago and he lives in a different state. We haven't met yet but are in kind of a committed relationship. We are meeting in two weeks and I made the mistake of getting way too drunk and sleeping with a male acquaintance. I was so out of it (not an excuse) but I did stop it shortly after we started having sex and began crying. I haven't stopped crying since, the guilt is killing me. I don't understand why I did this, I've never cheated on someone before and I don't sleep around. It is so out of character, I kind of hate myself for what I've done. I have been dreaming about meeting my boyfriend for the longest time and I can't believe I've done something like this to fuck it up. Do I break up with him? Cancel the trip? I don't know, all I know is that I fucking love this guy and I've done something stupid that I will regret for the rest of my life. | Cheated on long distance boyfriend - what do I do? |
t3_1gmhpl | cats | Nursing mum is fighting with newborn kitten | I'm after some advice as I don't want to intervene unless absolutely necessary. Almost two weeks ago my Mum's cat (who isn't even one yet) gave birth to 6 kittens - two died at birth and four have survived. We haven't been handling the kittens until two days ago and that's been minimal, simply to check their all of a similar weight and to check that they aren't getting sick.
The problem is, the mum keeps picking the same one up and hiding it, or simply moving it away from the other kittens. Today she's taken to attacking the kitten, biting it's head, body and legs and even pouncing on it. I've tried to not intervene as I don't want the kitten to be rejected (SO hard to not shout at the mum but I don't want to encourage any possible rejection). I'm just wondering why the mum might be doing this and if I should take this kitten away from the mother and hand feed her. I'm scared the mum is going to seriously hurt the kitten! Maybe it's because the mum is a kitten herself? Thank you in advance for any advice, very much appreciated. | Nursing mum seems to be trying to eat/kill one of her babies. |
t3_2aqusx | relationships | Me [26M] with my girlfriend [22F] of a 1.5 years, am I wasting my time? | Everything started out great. I fell head over heels for her and after a short time we started dating. The first 10 months or so went really well, we spent almost all of our time together.. after that my apartment was condemned and I moved in with her. It never seemed like a big deal, and at first nothing seemed to change.
But then I started noticing that we weren't as connected as we were at the beginning. She was busy with a very busy school and work schedule, so I just chalked it up to her being stressed and kept telling myself that it would get back to normal. After awhile of that I realized that she wasn't really being affectionate ever, our sex life was dwindling and we just weren't the same. I mentioned it to her, she apologized and said she'd work on it, and for awhile she did. But it didn't last. Again, I just chalked it up to her stress, kept telling myself it'll get better. We recently moved to Philadelphia (from WV) together and it seemed better at first. But it's flamed out again. We've talked about it, I've tried to reignite the spark, but it just doesn't seem to work.
I used to think we had a lot in common, but I'm starting to realize that's just a few bands and TV shows. We used to drink and party a lot together, but that's turned into most nights on the couch staring at computer screens. I want it to work, I love the girl, but it seems more and more like it's going downhill fast. Is there anything I should try? Or am I wasting my time? | Had a great beginning, but it's flamed out |
t3_k9q6b | cats | Acquired cat! Now a question.. | So, I just got a lovely little cat named Luna. She's about a year, a year and a half and pretty tiny. I live in an apartment located on the 5th floor of my building. My apartment doesn't have AC (I'm in NYC) and I usually like to leave the windows open for ventilation. They've got child bars, but because Luna is so small she can easily fit through them--and did a few moments ago. Nearly gave me a heart attack watching her slip through them and walked out onto a very narrow ledge 5 floors above a concrete sidewalk. She came right back in, but now I'm concerned about having a dead cat on my hands (or more accurately, on my sidewalk). So my question is, should I trust her cat instincts and leave the windows open? Or shall I sit in a stuffy apartment with the windows sealed? | I live on the 5th floor and my cat just walked out on my window ledge and came back in. Should I be nervous she's going to explore too far out and fall to her kitty death? |
t3_2hmyhq | relationships | I (22F) have a texty ex (26M) | We were together a little over a year and it was very rocky for most of the latter half. We broke up and got back together a few times because even though I knew in my heart it was over, he would cry/passionately proclaim his love for me/promise to work harder to fix things/etc. It was a little manipulative and very unattractive and it's (ironically) part of what pushed me to finally break it off for real.
It's been about two weeks since we last saw each other and he won't stop texting me. He'll just ask me casually what I'm up to, invite me out for lunch and ask if he can come with me to wherever I'm headed.
I've consistently said no to hanging out because I know he'll try to rope me back in, plus spending time with your ex just not a healthy way to get over them. I've even said no to a phone call (too harsh?). I'm doing pretty well post-break up but when he texts me it stirs up all the same emotions and upsets me quite a bit, especially when he asks to hang out.
How do I tell him to stop contacting me? Or maybe just to wait a month or two? I really don't want to crush him anymore than I already have, but he is clearly not moving on and I don't want him to drag me down with him. | Need to get my ex boyfriend to leave me alone. |
t3_1sa2ff | relationships | Me [16 M] with my Tutor[16 F] Just met twice, I'm liking her | I got an English tutor as I'm not doing well in my English class. I met her about 3 weeks ago for the first time and we started the tutoring lessons this week. This week it was only once, but now on we're meeting every other day.
I'm a quiet guy, but when I get comfortable around people I get much louder. Also, I've never had a girlfriend, as I never had a genuine liking for any specific girl. This girl is different though, she's smart, pretty and friendly.
Any tips for what I should do or act? I'm new to the whole dating thing, and am wondering on how to act with her. Any input would be greatly appreciated. | Being tutored by a girl, just met her a bit ago, I like her, any advice? |
t3_3c9pt9 | relationships | Me [30F] with my bf [32M] 1.5 years, I am no longer attracted to my bf due to his poor hygiene and immaturity, but he's been nice to me and I have no social life beyond him whatsoever | A few nights ago I was spending the night at my boyfriends house and he wanted me to have sex with him. I was totally turned off by it due to not only his obesity (he weighs about 375 lbs) but his poor hygiene (he hasn't been wearing deodorant lately or showering very much, he also wears filthy clothes with cat hair all over them) and the fact that his room smells like cat piss. I was so disgusted and overwhelmed by the smell that I just wanted out of there and to go home, but he wouldn't leave me alone until I got him off. It just disgusted me and I never want to be intimate with him again.
He is also very immature and has no goals, ambition, or cares about anything other than comic books, Magic the Gathering and other stuff. Those aren't bad things in themselves but he never talks about anything but that. He expects me to leave and move in with him which is ridiculous since he lives in a bedroom at his friend's house with a cat. I told him there was no room and he told me that
I've tried very hard to hint around that some of these things bother me, but he totally doesn't get it.
I have been fighting this feeling of not being attracted to him for a long time. He has been there for me in a hard time when both my parents died and I was totally alone. He is a really nice person despite the things I listed above I don't feel like I have the right to judge him in a way, because I am currently overweight and I have no friends, besides people on the internet. I am really lonely and I do not want to be alone. My social skills are pretty poor as well. Basically I am a loser, but I smell nice. | Boyfriend is obese, unhygienic, and immature. He's been nice to me though, when other people haven't, so I feel guilty about dumping him. I don't have any social life to fall back on either. |
t3_vhq3n | relationship_advice | Advice for parents[50F][49M]. More inside. | They have been married for ~25 years.
My father cheated on my mother, while they were still married, about 4-5 years ago and my mother didn't find out until 2 years ago. My father thinks it is done and over with and should be swept under the rug. My mother believes that my father feels no remorse for doing what he did and thinks that he should do more to make it up to her.
I really don't know what else to add to this, but I just don't know where to turn anymore. I don't know who else outside of the immediate family knows or if they should know. I should mention I'm 21, I have 2 other brothers that live here one 18 and other 16. | Father had an affair, mother doesn't think he is remorseful, at my wits end. |
t3_22d32u | running | Race Report: The Charlottesville Marathon | Where?- Charlottesville, VA. Home to the UVA Cavaliers, Jefferson's Rotunda, and the Miller Lite Bad to the Bone Marathon.
When?- Usually the first week in April. This year it was April 5th.
How much?- Ticket prices to the Marathon can range from $80-$123. It depends on when you get the tickets. The $80 price is when you buy them almost a year in advance, and the $123 price is buying the ticket the week of the event.
Why should I run it?- Charlottesville is a college-town with a running culture. If you spend five minutes on any major street, you'll see someone out for a jog sporting a Ragged Mountain Running Shop T-shirt and some flashy shoes. This race will help you understand Charlottesville more than anything else. On top of this, the city is nestled in the Appalachian foothills. The trail weaves in and out of the city and its surrounding parks pushing you up University Avenue at one point and pulling you along the Rivanna trail at another. It's pretty. Oh yeah, and since the event is sponsored by Miller Lite, each bib comes with a free beer ticket. Yes, a post-race brew. (it's not limited to Miller Lite, you can get Blue Moon if it's what you prefer). | Camaraderie, pretty flowers, and free beer. |
t3_10g26f | relationships | [22]Celebacy while dating? | My boyfriend [22] of like <1 year, is the best man I can ask for. I'm [21, 22 in a week] I could go on about it and make a HUGE wall of text about how great he is, but I won't.
He recently decided he wanted less sex. We maybe have sex once a week, including mutual masturbation in the mornings. We see each other about 4/7 times, in a week. He works a lot, and I do not. I am a student and a small scale farmer, however. It's more of a hobby.
He wants less sex, because he admires what Tesla did, and their by wants to do the same thing Tesla did. Less sex equals higher productivity. I tried explaining the counter argument to that theory, and he heard me and agreed, but here we are, sexless. | he wants less sex and I want more. What do? |
t3_110eq7 | relationships | (20m) fighting with girlfriend (19F) on clothing. | My girlfriend is usually a pretty modest person. been going out 6 months. A while back, she bought a dress for her work (works in a semi formal office setting). After buying it, she told me "hey, I'm only going to wear this dress when im with you because it's short" and she knows I love things like when she's showing she cares about my opinion. Today we're getting up to go to work, she's being weird with me about something that happened at my job, and decides because it's fast to put this dress that its fine to wear. Do I have a right to be upset not because of the length of the dress, but because she said it was SPECIFICALLY something special for us? | girlfriend wore something she said was for us, wears it to work anyways. |
t3_lshek | AskReddit | How would I go about giving financial aid to a family in a really poor country without being scammed? | Ok I was reading a [news article about this guy Chen Guangbiao] (A Chinese billionaire who happens to be under investigation of fraud for his philanthropy, but that is another story).
And it got me thinking about how I have a TON of income compared to some families around the world. In one of the articles I read about Chen the article quoted an annual income average for a rural Chinese family of around $150USD a year. And I am sure some of you know about the ["If the world were a village" statistics] (It is also [a children's book] if anyone cares).
I know I can easily give $20 or more a year, which would probably help a family which falls into that income bracket a LOT. But I want to be able to make sure it goes toward something like medicine/farm equipment/food/housing/etc.
I know someone will ask why I am not donating to a local cause, and it's not that I don't want to help people in the US. I just want my money to go further and help people who have almost nothing, and maybe promote a little international good will.
Is there a way to find/communicate with a family in some rural part of the world? I know I can write them letters, but I feel like the language barrier would be pretty big hurdle. I also don't want my money to have some ridiculous 40-80% taken off the top by some 'charity' organization if at all possible, because it totally eliminates the advantage of donating to another country with USD.
Is this even possible? I feel like I am just asking to be scammed ಠ_ಠ | How would I go about giving money to a family in a really poor country without being scammed? |
t3_30l1ug | tifu | TIFU By befriending a cannibal in grade 4-5. | As usual this didn't happen today, it actually happened around 10 years ago when I was in grade 4 or 5.
I was not the most popular kid in school back in the day, probably starting from around grade 2 nobody liked me and my friends. It did suck being hated by so many, but things were a lot worse for the 2nd tier dorks. There was a few kids in my school that would wander the play ground alone and cause all girls to run away in fear if they ever got close. Seeing as I also got a similar, less disgusted reaction from everybody I felt bad for one of these kids. I started talking to him, joking with him, overall trying to cheer him up and this is were things went down hill.
It was a normal day in class, me and the weird kid said hello, talked a bit and then he insisted that he sat next to me. I didn't really mind and continued on with my work. I started noticing he kept staring at me without saying anything but I just ignored it, seeing as he was 'the weird kid'. A few minutes later, with the speed of 6 hyenas, he jumped forward and bit me on the arm. For about a second or two I sat there, completely bewildered as he nibbled on my arm. After realizing it was actually hurting a lot, I pushed him away and yanked my blood covered arm right out of his slimy gob. He looked at me and apologized as I turned and ran to the teacher. When the teacher asked the kid why he savagely barraged my arm with nibbles, he just straight up said "I was hungry". | tried to make a weird kid feel better and ended up being attacked by him because he was hungry. I not only had a sore arm but I felt horrible for the kids living conditions at home, double whammy. |
t3_3cipac | relationships | Am I [25M] being unrealistic about sex with the woman [25F] I'm in a relationship with for wanting it to last longer? | I feel like something might be wrong with me, but I like a lot of sex and have been very sexual, so sex an important part of being in a relationship with a woman.
I know lots of couples have sex at least once a day (and more).. but that is not my issue. It's not the frequency, which is troubling me, it is the duration. I'm okay with quickies to extended love making sessions.
But I was with a woman where our sessions were 9 hours.. from sun down to sun up. It was not like that every time especially during the week due to work and commitments so it would just be "normal" from quickies to hours. But almost every weekend, we had sessions where it did last close to 9 hours. I am starting to miss that.
I've brought up wanting to play longer than than the several hours, and she tries to play for longer but I could tell she gets tired. So I end it quicker than I want to. I can't tell her I was with a girl that could play that long so she should too if she asks whats the longest duration I had personally, which is why I don't push her to try to do it for long.
As I get older will my sex drive (if that's what it even is.. wanting to play for that long) drop ? So I won't be thinking "I wish this was longer". Is this something I have to compromise and be okay with never getting again? | 9 hours too long? |
t3_3580x6 | relationships | My ex [25/f] and I [26/m] haven't been together for nearly four months and I still can't get over it. In your experience, how long does this take? | Link to the original post -
As I said in the title, her and I have been broken up for almost four months but it is something I still think about every day. We haven't spoken in nearly a month and when we do it's just about things related to the apartment we used to share (she moved out and our lease is up in June, so that will be coming to an end soon).
I also found out that she started seeing somebody else days after she ended things with me, so obviously that was the reason for the breakup. I've been going to the gym religiously, hanging out with friends all the time, meeting new people, doing all the things that one is "supposed" to do after a long term relationship has ended...but it's still something that lingers.
Even after finding out what actually happened, I still try to make sense of it in my head. I just don't understand how you can be with someone for 7 years, move into an apartment together, plan on having kids together, telling the other person they're the love of your life almost daily, and then just end it. For some reason I keep dwelling on it, not able to move past it.
I guess my questions is addressed to people who have been dumped after a long term relationship - how long does it take to truly get over that person? I don't really talk about anything involving her with my friends because I don't want to be "that guy" who got dumped by his gf and is now a total buzzkill because of it. After about a month I learned to cover everything up pretty well so every one of my friends, family members and coworkers think that I am handling everything just fine. But in reality, I've thought about my ex every single day, multiple times a day since it's all happened. | How long does it take to stop thinking about your ex after a long term relationship has ended? |
t3_xly00 | relationships | I am ALWAYS the one to initiate sex...I am the girl...need advice & guy's perspective :-( | Hey guys so my boyfriend and I have been together for roughly 4 and a half years now & he was just away for about 6 months last year as he went halfway across the U.S. to college. He came back and we picked up where we left off.
We're good, we trust each other, everything is stable except lately I noticed I initiate sex way too often and feel like he doesn't even want it unless I try something. I'm very attracted to him and my sex drive is through the roof so of course I will cave....but lately it's been getting on my nerves...
I know sex is not the whole part of a relationship, but if he isn't trying anything with me, and for the most part, has gotten "too comfortable" where he KNOWS I will initiate it, how do I know he still desires me? | Boyfriend doesn't initiate sex with me; what does it mean? |
t3_259u9r | relationships | Me [20m] just got out of an 8 month relationship with my gf [19F]. I am very emotional, she wasnt. | I am far from the stereotypical macho, no emotions, no mushy stuff guy. I love romance, I love to be cute, and express my love in various ways. She is far from the stereotypical mushy, emotional, lovey dovey girl. She never speaks about her feelings, she never tells me whats wrong and she never told me she loved me without me having to say it first. Never called me babe, never had much to talk about. My question aimed at both genders: Are girls generally emotional, do you ladies like to speak about emotions? Do you generally like when the guy is cute with you and calls you babe, and says he loves you? When I speak about this, Im not meaning in a clingy way, all the time looking for validation and kisses and stuff, just occasionally, but regularly? I guess. And guys, do you feel that your girlfriend is emotional? That she loves being cute and romantic? doesnt matter if you are the same back, I was just wondering because I am romantic and I thought most girls like that kind of stuff. | Me emotional guy, gf unemotional. Broke up, wanting to know if most girls actually like romance and guys caring and shit, or if this unemotional, uncommunicative bullshit is the norm. |
t3_3kbx9e | relationships | Me [18 M] with my Girlfriend [16 F] (4 months) - I'm constantly paranoid i'm screwing up my relationship and it's having bad effects on me | Let me preface this by saying I love my girlfriend very much, and most of this is probably my fault.
Alot of time whenever I'm talking to/skyping/etc with my girlfriend i'm worrying that i did something wrong and that she is weirded out or mad at me and just isn't telling me. It doesn't help that this is a long distance relationship so we rarely get to see each other in person (like every 2 months at best).
This is likely entirely my fault, although it could be caused by what happened in a previous (semi-)relationship that I was in where the girl lied to me extensively and now I feel insecure and unable to trust any reaction my girlfriend has, even though I do love her with all of my heart.
This is having an effect on me as a person.. (I am finding it harder to focus, i'm often apparently more outwardly sad to people while i'm worrying about this stuff, etc. I don't know what to do at this point but I don't want to break up with my girlfriend because I know it's an issue with me and not her. What should I do? | I constantly worry that I've done something to weird out or upset my girlfriend and can't help it - it's having detrimental affects on me as a person.. |
t3_u4qrv | AskReddit | Girl had nip slip in photo, Blamed on me. | I was with friends and we were going through pictures on facebook when we came across this photo from this years prom where a girl has a nip slip. It is barely visable, but we noticed it. (I should have reported the picture for nudity, but with friends i didn't think of it. We agreed to not tell anyone about it. However on of them ended up telling one of his friends, and that friend told others, and it spread to mostly everyone in the school. The girl in my school now found out from a kid. that mostly everyone doesn't like, that "I have a picture of a nip slip, work on yearbook and prom commity, (which i don't) and showed everyone."
What should i do, I already told the girl that i am not involved with anything and that the kid is basically making it all up.
Should i "throw him under the bus", just as he did to me, or should i just leave it alone now. | Girl had a nip slip at prom, photo was taken (not on purpose) and it was blamed on me. |
t3_snjt4 | AskReddit | What's your craziest family gathering story? | Mine would definitely have to be my cousin's wedding reception. All of the wedding guests had been at the venue for around 2 hours. It was around 9 o clock when things started to go downhill. My uncle ( a known alcoholic) had had one too many drinks, and was slowly descending into an alcohol ridden frenzy. After egging on a wedding guest for several minutes, a tussle between the two broke out, and somehow said uncle had procured a screwdriver (from where I may never know) and attempted to stab wedding guest with it.
At this point, my father, brother, and grandfather manage to wrestle the screwdriver away from my uncle, and free the wedding guest from his grip. My uncle then begins to rage at my dad, and tries to strangle him while my grandfather are pinning him down on the floor in the wedding venue. They then manage to take my severely inebriated uncle outside and tie him to a tree. Many photos ensued by shocked guests. And just incase you were wondering, my uncle now attends AA meetings. | Alcoholic uncle goes into rage mode, is later tied to a tree. |
t3_sxbg4 | relationships | Pride only hurts, it never helps. | Me 26 Her 28
Having a tough time on my own with this one. I'm realizing how much my pride and ego are controlling a recent incident and if they're good indicators on wether I should take my gf back or not.
My girlfriend and I have been dating for a little over 3 years. There's been ups and downs recently and in early February we broke up, but were still in contact with each other everyday. Earlier last month the GF left on a trip for two weeks. The day before she left we reconnected and It seemed like we were getting back together. We made a promise to not sleep with anyone and to talk more when she gets back. I send her some brief emails, she comes across really distant so I back off a little, not wanting to smother her. She gets back and we click, get along amazingly, it feels like a fresh start between us and I couldn't be happier.
Now she tells me that she slept with some guy while on the trip. I'm angry, hurt etc. Today had a face to face talk where I forgave her but also said we shouldn't be together or talk anymore. She's a wreck right now to say the least, extremely remorseful.
I understand we weren't technically together, but she made a promise to me before she left. I do love her. I want to forgive and forget, but the images and fact of it happening keep eating away at any thought of her I have. | Girlfriend on break sleeps with another guy (after promising not to), lots of remorse, trying to figure out if I should take her back. |
t3_2q6rxl | tifu | TIFU by stalking someones Instagram. | So I was on Instagram and I was looking at some of my friends photos. I looked at about 6 people before I went onto one of my female friends. She is just an average person who I usually Skype frequently. (I have a group of friends, and we do Skype group calls often).
So I go to her Instagram page and I look at some of her photos when I stumble across a video. (Note this video is like 7 months old) I try to press play on the video and for some fucking reason my phone decides to be a cunt and lags on me.
I press the play symbol like 7 times and the video finally begins to play. And this is where I fucked up. For some stupid reason, I wanted to watch the video again. I press the play button twice because it didn't work the first time.
And of course I like the video. I like the 7 month old fucking video. I fucking shit my pants and quickly unlike the video in like 2 seconds and I think to myself, oh don't worry you unliked in time it'll be ok.
I was wrong.
2 hours later, as usual I go onto Skype to go on a group call with my friends. I think that I got away with it because she didn't mention anything for like 30 mins. We are in the middle of a normal conversation and out of nowhere this girl decides to fucking embarrass me.
Even though there is 4 other people on the call, she says this:
"So James, did you have fun stalking me today on Instagram?"
And i'm just like: "wtf are you talking about?."
She goes on and decides to tell the whole fucking group that I started stalking her on Instagram. I try to back up myself by saying I "accidentally" clicked on her profile and that I "accidentally" clicked on the video and I "accidentally" liked it.
She doesn't believe my story and now she always refers to me as the "Instagram Stalker" | I stalked someones Instagram and liked one of their old posts and got caught :D |
t3_nxx5g | AskReddit | confused. | I am not biased towards religion nor am I biased for or against atheism. I try not judge people by their personal beliefs because I know we are all different, either through evolution or through some supreme being. It doesn't matter to me if you think that God created us, or if we are space farts; fact of the matter is that we are all different for some reason or another. People will believe what they want to believe or not believe. The ones who accept everyone to this degree and see that we all can use values from some source or religion/non-religion are the outstanding people. However, the longer I lurk and browse Reddit, the more I see that the atheism subreddit demands the most attention. They follow one another's' beliefs as if they were following a religion, and though they do not have a leader or supreme being, they do enjoy posting links that breed the same hate and intolerance as other religions do. I would like to think that some people are different and that perhaps a subreddit that would speak of indifference towards others would exist somewhere; and some people would motion for that change of universal tolerance of everyone and everything; however I now see that /r/atheism is just another religion. I'm sorry to those who cannot speak their mind in any religious or nonreligious threads for fear of losing karma or getting down voted and that as much as the followers of /r/atheism try to say they are not a hivemind and that they speak out as individuals, collectively they are a group. I fully expect to be downvoted for this post, but I would like to see if there is anyone lurking around that just believe in being kind, generous, loving, caring, and all those "good" things, without the need for religious or non-religious gratification. Do people like this exist, or are we a dying breed? And look at that, now that I read my own post I suppose it is human nature to judge someone even if you don't want to. Guess I'll just stick to f7u12 for some laughs and leave the rest alone. | I try not to give fucks, but eventually fucks are given. Can fucks be ungiven? Help. |
t3_4am4fs | relationships | Me [22 M] with my Ex [22F] 18mo, pushing year since breakup, Can't get over her | We had a rough breakup after a 2 month deal with constant "breaks"(that never held). We hurt each other, driving me into deep depression and anxiety. We tried to make it work but she ended it only days after agreeing we'd try. The issues are definitely both our faults, we've both admitted it. We backslid for a month or so in October, I started to get the feelings back, her not so much. Then she claims she wants to just be friends and has no time for a relationship even though she misses me, but then cuts me out of her life completely. Why can't I get over her? She's constantly in my dreams, and every girl I talk to/hang out with brings her back to the back of my mind, and I can hear her in my head. I would definitely give it another shot, she's amazing. But obviously she doesn't, and I can't get over her. What do I do? | Can't get over Ex, been almost a year, help? |
t3_4rc5a7 | relationships | Female, 25 is this where relationships have come? What is this even? | I moved interstate after a breakdown relationship with a man, James 25. Not knowing anyone, or meeting anyone but females through work and college I turned to tinder.
In January 2016, I met three males from the app. Steve 25, Dan 27 and Tom 25. I see them twice a week, they know about each other but don't want to know anything more than "I see other people".
When I see any of them, we go out, do couple things, hold hands, subtle public displays of affection. I stay at their houses, I've met their friends and family, vice versa.
I've never called any of them my boyfriend, and my family laughs and asks which boyfriend I am seeing. Is it friends/friends with benefits, is it dating, is it a relationship by definition of time frame, intimacy and closeness? How do you define your relationship status because men who want a girlfriend don't see me as available.
Our time together isn't about sex, we have formed solid friendships that even the discussion of them finding a girlfriend they said they wouldn't stop seeing me, and we would continue a platonic friendship.
I recently visited my hometown, and ended up staying with James 25 who was my past lover. We did the couple thing, knew nothing was going to come of this and accepted we will just enjoy our time together without labelling or deepening the meaning.
Around these 4 men, I still see other men but not full time or for long extended times.
My family makes fun of the situation to the point it arises heated arguments. I have a twin sister, with a child and the same partner since high school. I am happy, and no one is getting hurt except friends and family. They want me to pick one man and settle down.
I don't feel ready for a boyfriend. I am a fulltime uni student juggling 4 different jobs, flying in and out for work and living in two cities. | Seeing 4 men for 7months+, they're aware of each other. Refraining from saying "I love you" and using ownership, is this modern dating? Non-committal types, not admitting feelings, deep friendships amongst the sex, and a strong presence in each others lives involving friends and family. |
t3_jc0w7 | AskReddit | Those that have a lot of music: How do you organize it? | Well, like the title says, I have tons of music on my laptop and I've been meaning to organize it all. I want to delete all of the duplicate songs I have, delete a lot of stuff that I don't listen to, and tag everything so that it's all neatly organized. The reason I haven't done anything yet is because I don't know where to start. I've googled around and have found little information which is why I turned to reddit. I wasn't exactly sure what subreddit to post this in either, so I'm hoping AskReddit was a good choice. | want to organize all of my music and i don't know where to begin! Please help D: |
t3_4pfknv | relationships | I [26] am nervous about applying for a job. Does anyone have any tips/anecdotes about chilling out/getting a job in a different country? | Hi
It's basically as the title says.
I've moved to another country to live with my bf. All is well. He says I don't need to work (he earns quite a bit), and my chosen profession is writing (I'm self-published), but I want to find a day job nonetheless. I really want to. I want to get out of the house (lovely as it is, it is limiting to be stuck inside all day) and I want to meet some people to talk to. I don't know anyone here except the bf, and like the house, and even if he's my favourite person to talk to, it just gets limiting at some point (I'm still trying not to feel guilty about this).
I am currently working on my CV. I want to apply to become cashier/employee at the local cinema. This would be a dream day job for me. I'd get to talk to people, work in a team, and hey, I've always been partial to movies. At one point, I even applied to study film! (I declined the offer afterward and decided to focus on writing... which I still hope will take off at some point soon!)
It's just: I am incredibly nervous. I don't speak this country's language perfectly yet (I've been learning though, and getting better!), and I don't know whether they will mind. I have about a month (I need to go back to my own country still to go to the doctor) to get to a better level.
I'm just already nervous when I haven't even sent the application yet. :/ What can I do to lessen the anxiety? I haven't exactly been social in the past few years (depression), but I would really like to do this job. | I'm going to apply for a job. I'm nervous about it. What can I do? |
t3_1h4six | relationships | Me[30M] with my [30F] friend stopped wanting to hang out but is still being nice | So I reconnected with a friend from years back and we started hanging out a lot and having a lot of fun and good conversation and stuff, for I'd say about a month or so. She initiated it and some texts seemed genuinely interested in me like maybe she was interested romantically. A couple times we came close to actually doing romantic things. Her friends implied she liked me.
Anyway all of a sudden, for the past few weeks, she doesn't seem to want to do anything and hasn't really texted me and is just sending nice/cordial replies to my texts.
I don't know what's going on, I don't think I've done anything wrong but maybe she just got sick of me or is dating someone else, what do you think?
I'm pretty bummed about it but accept that I should just move on. I'm getting too old I think to really start a family and I've gone this long without ever having a girlfriend so I think this was my last chance at something real. I don't have the heart to invest myself in another relationship. | is she just being nice to keep me around or so I get the hint? |
t3_2rfom1 | relationships | Me [18 M] with my girlfriend [19 F] of a year and 8 months, left me after finding messages I sent to other girls at the beginning of our relationship. | During the last year of highschool, I got involved with one of my classmates and long term friends. We had a semi-date/summer-fling thing going on at the end of the school year and over the summer. However, as she was going overseas for school at the end of the summer it was understood that it would be over when that time came.
This was the first time anyone had been interested in me, and I guess it gave me some degree of confidence because I messaged some girls on facebook around this time like an idiot. I wasn't trying to seduce or flirt with them. Hindsight is 20/20 and I wish I never had because when the summer rolled around we ended up in a long-distance relationship that has lasted for a year and 8 months.
Fast forward to this last week when we were reunited for the holidays. I had completely forgotten about anything I had sent on Facebook in the initial, tenuous days of our relationship when anything permanent seemed impossible. My girlfriend happened to stumble on them, however, and was very upset. She now thinks that all I do when I am away from her is become emotionally involved with other people.
We have now been on a "break" for a couple days in which I haven't heard a single thing from her. I am completely torn up inside over what a younger, more naive me did. She is the most incredible person and I don't know what to do. | Girlfriend finds old messages to other girls and we go on a break. I don't know what to do. |
t3_18gbdr | loseit | BMR/TDEE and the last 30lbs! | So, this is going to be a post about BMR and TDEE because I've sat down and I'm trying to re-calculate it all; and still fumbling through it. I can honestly say that I know I don't need to make any adjustments to my diet to maintain weight loss; I'm just trying to grasp all the scientific made up numbers to make projections on the amount time it'll take. (Based on estimates and made up numbers!)
SO, a quick run around to some generic calculators has given me this:
BMR: 2024
TDEE: 3137
I'm 6', 196lbs. I work out five times a week (mon-fri) and walk for an hour on sat/sun which is still a workout but I'm not counting it. (So I pick Moderate on the activity thing)
My current calorie intake is generally 1000-1200 calories daily. With a few fluctuations, but I never come near 2000 calories.
The last time I tried the whole BMR/TDEE thing I got really skewed numbers, anyone who's accustomed to those able to get different numbers for me?
Right now at my current projections I've got around two more months to hit 165lbs, if I stay the course, which I plan to...forever. (What I'm aiming for, to make the other made up number BMI go down to 20-22 range.)
**I call all these numbers made up because I haven't seen a doctor to get any of them measured | I think my BMR is 2024 and TDEE is 3137 @ 6' 196lbs. Does anyone get any other numbers? What am I doing wrong when I do the calculations? Why the heck do I feel like 165lbs is underweight for my height.... |
t3_1hdp5m | AskReddit | Best way to discreetly block access to porn on a computer? | So I have a friend of mine who is her family's computer go-to-person (i.e. she uses google), I'm my family's go-to-person so I understand her pains. However, unlike my own family, hers is not appreciative at all and in fact basically delineate it as a chore rather than a favor; I've talked her through some things on the phone or through skype and I can hear her family in the background sometimes being rude to her *while* she is helping them. Long story short, her step grand father is particularly bad, and we just helped get rid of the FBI MoneyPak virus for him and he's already complaining. Looking through his history, one understand why he has so many viruses - 90% of his computer time is spent on porn sites. What I'm looking to do is - through the router or the computer (through the hosts file?), not through software though - block access to any site with a sex-related URL, and block most known porn sites. | revenge against ungrateful pricks, how to block porn w/o installing a program. |
t3_1kl4sz | tifu | TIFU by Letting my Brothers onto an Social Experiment I was Planning. | Not so recently, my grandma was put into a personal care home due to a broken hip and both of her daughters just not having the time to be able to care for her as she needs to be. More recently, the pitbull that the couple who run this home has had a litter of puppies. Out of the 8, 7 survived and 1 of those is the second smallest of the litter. She is extremely shy and the mother extremely protective of her. I decided I was going to name all of the pups and get the owners of the care home to start calling each pup by the name I had given them. There is Chewie, Shiva, Alfalfa, Spanky, Sugar Plum, Tommy, and finally, the focus of my fuck up, Fluttershy. She is the center of my social experiment. Since these pups will soon be fit to be taken away from their mother, I was going to use Shy as a way to figure out a rough estimate as to how many bronies live in my area, outside of high school and college, by how many prospective adopters catch on to the name. The fact that the pup is named after a pony from a TV show escaped from everyone, until today, when, in a discussion about Amnesia, I mention Alois from the Justine DLC of Amnesia. Both of my brothers ask who he is and I explain to them the previous information and am met with blank looks. I explain to them again as follows:
"Yeah, you remember, they took Fluttershy (the pony, not the pup) and made her into him in 'A Small Horse?'" (A custom story for Amnesia for those who don't know)
And that's when they connected the dots and questioned after my reasons for naming a beautiful and shy little pitbull pup after an animated pony from a TV show. | I attempted an incognito social experiment to estimate to see how many bronies live in my area and got it blown wide open by way of discussion of video games. |
t3_3zm7ca | relationships | There is a 80% chance I (20F) can't have children, but my boyfriend (24M) will not stop bringing up wanting to have his own kids. I don't know what to do. | I found out recently that I have a medical condition that makes it very difficult for me to conceive, and very, very risky for me and the baby. If I were to get pregnant, I would have to take a shot of heparin (blood thinner) in my stomach twice a day to reduce the risk of miscarriage, and thrombosis.
So basically, i've decided that I am not going to bother with pregnancy, and I have let my boyfriend of two years know this as well. Yet, for some reason, he still brings up "when we have our own kids!", "when you're pregnant, and I have to rush you to emerge", or "I can't wait until I get to create a little life."
And every time, I have to remind him that it's not really possible and he gets really sad. We have talked about adoption, but I don't know if he is that interested in adopting.
I just wish I could be that pregnant girlfriend or wife he wants in the future, but at the same time I wish he could be sensitive to the fact that I can't and wont have kids. | I probably can't have kids, but boyfriend wants kids and doesn't really want to adopt. I want to be able to have children for him, but also want him to respect me. |
t3_1s044m | relationships | Me [22 F] with my boyfriend [21 M] of 2 years just broke up and I'm struggling | This was my second serious relationship and my boyfriend's first. We've been through so much together and have always stuck by each other's side through the worst of things.
During the breakup, I tried to make it seem somewhat mutual because I didn't want to feel that vulnerable, but in my mind it was one-sided. If it was up to me, we would still be together. The reason we broke up was because we are both young and he felt that we both needed more experience before we were ready to start a life together. That we didn't know what we really wanted because we have never had anything else.
We left open the possibility of getting back together in the future, but I don't think I can. Every time I think of him, every time I see something that reminds me of him I burst into tears. I've never felt so hurt before in my life and I'm afraid of ever feeling this way again.
I still love him and worry that I will always love him. I don't know how to get over him. He was my best friend, we did everything together. My life just feels so empty now and I don't know what to do.
I'm not even sure what I'm trying to ask here. I just needed somewhere to express my feelings. Reading through all the posts here have made me feel that I'm not alone. It's the only thing helping me get through this right now. I'm not even trying to be happy right now, I'm just trying not to hurt anymore.
What do I do now? What do I do if he wants to get back together? How do I throw away this relationship when I thought that this is the man I wanted to be with for the rest of my life? | Just lost the best person in my life, don't know how to move on |
t3_39evy6 | relationships | I [24 M] ended a very new relationship with a long time friend [24 F] because we seemed to want different things out of our relationship. She seemed to agree when I brought it up to her, but now I am not sure if I did the right thing. | So I had met this girl when I started this new job. She worked there for a few months after I got hired, then moved onto a different career path. But was still a part of the social circle I was a part of. I had a huge crush on her soon after, she did not reciprocate that feeling. I was a little sour about it, but decided to remain cordial to her as she was still in my immediate social circle.
Fast forward a few years, we had each gone off and dated other people, but also grew to become close friends through out this time. Then about two months ago, after a few drinks together, she out of the blue kisses me, thus spawns our relationship.
As you can see, I had some mixed feelings about this, as i don't really appreciate being the "ace up some ones sleeve". But I chose to pursue this because I had to at least try. Things are fine for a few weeks, we dated pretty casually, saw each other once or twice a week at most. Then she started to grow distant, like she didn't ever have any time to see me etc. After it had been almost three weeks since I had seen her or even had a meaningful conversation with her I confronted her about it. After arguing via text message for a few days, I understood that she just wanted a much more casual relationship than what I had wanted. I told her that this relationship wasn't going to make either of us happy since we want different things out of it. She agreed and we both decided to remain friends, as there wasn't any animosity towards each other.
I felt it was a necessary decision at the time, but after a few days have passed, I feel like I may have done the wrong thing for the right reasons, and that I have thrown away a chance to be in a decent relationship with some one I enjoy. | Did I take the easy way out? Or did I make a wise choice by realizing that this was not going anywhere? |
t3_2g5yzn | relationships | [32M] Married but I have a huge crush on my coworker [23F]. How do I stop liking her? | Background: I've been married for over two years to an amazing woman. We love each other and plan to have a family together in the next few years. I never dated much and she was my first serious relationship and I know I absolutely lucked out.
The problem is that I've recently developed a crush on a very attractive coworker (my biggest crush since I met my wife almost eight years ago). It's a small office so it's inevitable that we have to interact several times a day. She's quite a few years younger than me so maybe this is partly a subconscious desire to relive my 20s or something.
I know there's zero interest on her part and I've been really trying to stop my feelings from developing, or from imagining any of the unrealistic scenarios of the two of us being together.
I feel like such a terrible spouse and am going crazy with guilt about this. I know there's no way that pursuing this coworker can lead anywhere good. I really want to know if there's a way to turn off that side of my brain every time I see her. | Big crush on younger coworker in small office. Want to stop liking her. |
t3_1yu5q3 | cats | really need your help with my cat, Never seen him act like this | So my brother comes over my house a lot and he is really scared of my cat, my cat is 2 and has always been a sweet heart so I never de-clawed him but today well I was working on my computer the my brother came home I didnt even notice until he started screaming I mean SCREEAMMINGG like if you had just cut your self really bad or were in a worse situation, I got up FAST ran to my door and thought SOMEONE MIGHT BE IN THE HOUSE, I literally grabbed my gun and went out my run expecting to see him at gun point or on the floor bleeding, instead he was on the counter screaming still with the cat hanging onto his leg making all sort of weird sounds, I put the gun down and quickly went to the cat thinking it would defuse him but he gave me a quick his and growl and stood his ground me and my brother got into a argument about what to do (He wanted me to shoot the cat) anyways 5 minuets went by and I got the cat into a room and then checked on my brother too see if he was over reacting and his leg was pretty fucked by the cat, lots of bite marks and blood dripping, this happend 30 min ago the cat is still locked up making growling sounds my brother left telling me he will not talk to me until I get rid of the cat (Which I will not do) but it makes me wounder... when should I let the cat out and what got over him... he is the type of cat that just sleeps on you all day.. | MY BRO GOT FUCKED UP BY MY CAT, I ALMOST GOT FUCKED UP BY HIM. CAT IS NEVER LIKE THAT AND IS EXTREMELY LOVABLE |
t3_19qtk5 | relationships | Wondering if I [17M] should pursue a friendship with ex [18F] or just move on. | My ex and I dated for a year and four months. First love kind of stuff, but roughly 11.5 months in her occasional depression turns to emotional abuse and she ends it, but at that point I was about to do it anyway.
Four months later, I'm basically over it; I even have my eye on doing a FWB with another girl. But being next to her in two classes a day, I'm starting to consider trying to be friends again, maybe something more.
I've been thinking about asking to hang out, but I'm both wanting to keep away and save the mess, and try it out as friends and see what happens. I don't want a relationship at all right now, but I'm still pulled towards my ex. I enjoy being around her, and talking to her is nice and easy. She's back to how she was when we first started dating.
Should I steer clear for a few months until school ends and she's more or less out of my life, or take a leap and see how things go? Opinions, advice, and anecdotes are welcome. If any additional information is needed, I'd be happy to supply it. Thank you. | Should I try to hang out with an ex and see where things go, or just keep clear? |
t3_2utrg5 | personalfinance | I need to be better with my finances. Any advice for a 20 year old male college student? | I work part-time bringing in about $300/month. I live with my parents and they help me out with school needs. I have a car. I share a credit union account with my girlfriend (19) who takes in about $1000/month working full time.
That being said, money is tight. We seem to be living paycheck to paycheck and our account is very unstable. I've tried to budget our cash flow but nothing seems to work. My girlfriend needs a car and while she makes enough money for even a $200/month car payment that money seems to vanish into thin air. We've discussed it and she admits she has a spending problem.
We'd like to move into an apartment but at this time, it's not feasible. So I would appreciate any advice for budgeting and any money-saving tips/lessons learned, etc. | My gf and I can't seem to make our money last. Any advice welcome. |
t3_2av915 | relationship_advice | [20/M] Feel like my [19/F] loves me more than I do. | Hey Redditor's,
My Girlfriend(One academic year younger) makes me feel like she loves me more than I love her. We've been together for approx 9 months now and when we're together it is (normally) fine as I can ask her for my own space without too much trouble yet she always wants to spend time together, sleep in the same bed etc whereas I myself ( quite an aloof person) don't feel the need to spend all my time with her and could happily not see her for 2-3 days. When we go away for holidays however, the relationship goes to complete shit. She wants to call every day and talk and gets irritated and upset if I don't return her calls. I will often wake up with 5+ missed calls from her when she goes on a night out and she will often make up a reason that she "needs" to speak to me (She does not lie apart from this)
This is both of our first serious relationships and I feel incredibly guilty when I bring these feelings up with her as she gets incredibly upset about the entire thing, for instance she was incredibly upset when I off-handedly said on the phone that :
"it's like I can't go on my facebook/whatsapp without her messaging/calling me"
I really appreciate any advice from anyone with any experience in these situations (or in fact anyone!) | Girlfriend can be clingy and it makes me feel guilty when I bring this up. |
t3_4yyvu1 | relationships | I [22F] love my boyfriend [24M] dearly, but I don't want to move in with him... | My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years.
Our relationship for the most part has been pretty good. We get along well in nearly every capacity - life plans, sex, etc. I'm very happy with him.
Yesterday he asked me to move in with him. I'm graduating college this fall, and am looking for a job in the same area he works.
When he asked, I realized... I really don't want to live with him. And I feel my reasons are kind of stupid.
I'm very close to my family, and I feel living with him would impede my ability to see them often. I travel to go see them and I don't want him to come with me. It's not that they don't like him - quite the opposite. I just don't like having him there. I have to entertain him, and he takes away from my ability to be with them.
Also, I want to move in my parents someday. I know he's against moving in his or my parents in the future, but I wish to live with mine.
Finally, I really enjoy being alone. I don't enjoy having him at my apartment longer than a few days - I begin to crave being fully alone.
I really do love him. But I don't know if this is a sign of a bigger issue or not. What should I say to him? Do you guys think this means anything? | I don't want to move in with my boyfriend because I like visiting my family without him, want to move my parents into my home in the future, and just like being alone. Does this mean anything? |
t3_39l9cs | weddingplanning | Self-Stocked Bar...sanity check my beer selections please? | Hi! I know this has come up a couple times before, but I'd like a sanity check on my self-stocked bar. I know what I'd like to drink, but I've never really bought alcohol for 120 people before.
Based on my research, I think my breakdown will be as follows:
* 25% cheapo light beer (local favorite is National Bohemian)
* 25% Mexican beer, to pair with our meal (probably Corona Extra)
* 25% something popular but a little darker (probably Yuengling)
* 25% small quantities of craft beers/cider for my beer snob friends (probably Angry Orchard, a local (Dogfish Head) IPA, and a local dark beer)
Things I'm second-guessing:
* I know some people only drink the major brands...should I swap the Boh out for a Bud Light/Miller Light/Coors Light for the name?
* Is the Corona going to be too much like the light beer? We're serving Chipotle. Would Dos Equis or Negra Modelo fit better?
* Are the craft beers going to complicate things? Should I keep it to 4 beers total and hope everyone finds something acceptable?
We're also serving a red wine sangria, and having a few bottles of liquor around just in case, if it affects your opinion :) | You're at a wedding. You have a burrito. What beer are you drinking? |
t3_47vfuj | relationships | Me [21 M] with my GF [23 F] 6 months, girlfriend talks to exes and gets mad when I talk to girls | So my GF is my first sexual partner, my GF has had many.
She talks to guys from her past. She talks weekly to 2 exes, which I'm fine with, but we recently got into a big fight, because she was texting, snapchatting and calling another guy who was either a fuck buddy, or used her for sex, or something along those lines, from her past. She yelled at me "I WILL TALK TO WHO I WANT TO TALK TO!!!!!! YOU DONT DESERVE TO KNOW MY PAST!!"
Initially, she was mad that I called her out on him being suspicious and her being secretive about this person. They talked infrequently for 2 months while in our relationship, and she kept her history with them and that they were talking at all, a secret. I told her I don't care if she has a past, I just don't like it when the past comes back around. I found out they were talking by seeing her best friends on Snapchat. She's always been one to delete all the texts her in phone.
Recently, I've been in these group chats with old elementary school friends, mostly the same 2-3 girls, and they just talk about some of the sketchy people from our class and where the heck they made it off to. We party together in the summer, but they've never been more than friends.
Anyways, now my GF is pissed that I'm talking to one good looking female friend, from elementary school, she says she's a slut and has ulterior motives. I would stop talking to her, but I think I first need to make it clear that my gf said she is going to talk to who she wants to, yet she's trying to control who I talk to.
There are always guys from her past, buzzing around our relationship, putting me down because I'm younger, etc. She has a lot of sexual partners, and they seem to come back around. I have none, so every girl I talk to, has only ever been just a friend. | GF talks to guys from her past, but gets mad when I talk to old female friends. What should I do? |
t3_40gya3 | legaladvice | Unemployment hearing- is my case valid? | My boyfriend and I moved to NY so he could attend medical school. I found a job as an assistant director of a social service agency.
Four months ago, my boyfriend and I were driving to see our families in PA when he said he was tired and wanted take a nap in the backseat. I looked back at him a few minutes later and he was unconscious, lips turning blue. Cardiac arrest. I called 911 and began CPR. Paramedics were able to revive him and he was transported to the hospital, where he stayed for the next 16 days (10 of which were in the ICU). Once he got to the hospital, he coded a second time. He was put to sleep for six days. Due to a lack of oxygen to his brain, we learned he has an anoxic brain injury but doctors stated that he has a strong possibility of making a full recovery as he is young (we are both 24). He was discharged from the hospital with a lifevest (external defibrillator) which he was unable to operate independently as it required him to simultaneously push two buttons. A rehabilitation hospital would only take him if someone was with him 24/7... So I became that person.
As it was unclear how long his recovery would take, I resigned from my position to care for I'm. We left NY and moved into his parents home so they could help care for him. We were living in NY for him to attend medical school, which is something he may not be capable of returning to.
In NY, you can receive benefits if you leave your job to care for someone. The department of labor acknowledges that this is what I did, but denied my claim because I had the option of taking a leave of absence. I appealed and they requested his medical reaords which I sent. My telephone hearing is scheduled for Wednesday. Any advice? | bf of 7 years went into cardiac arrest twice and now has an anoxic brain injury. We lived in NY for him to attend medical school but relocated to our home state when the severity of his injury became clear. Claim denied because I didn't request a leave of absence. I did this because it was unclear how long his recovery would take and we would not return to NY unless he is capable of returning to medical school. Hearing on Wednesday.. Help? |
t3_1f48os | AskReddit | One reason why the world is messed up today | Hello Reddit! I am a 16 year old student living in San Francisco California. Well... today I took my little brother shopping in the downtown area and on my way home there was this lady who asked this Asian bus driver whom spoke perfect english if the bus got off sunnydale and he said no. He asked her if she knew what bus was on and he proceeded to give her directions. She later walked to the front of the bus and she started calling him a chink etc and telling her 6 year old daughter Chinese people stink, the language sucks and that they smell bad (Way to set an example of your kid lady). Taking what she said to heart being half Chinese I later stated to tell her while getting off the bus that everything she has stated was derogatory, moronic and makes her look like an imbecile especially with her lack of sensitivity and the racist spews of volatile sludge she was spitting for no reason whatsoever. She then later told me that i was a bitch nigga and continuously stated I was a bitch. I then followed up by telling her that her lack of a good comeback only reflected on her absence of education and laughed while I walked off the bus. Parents like her are the reason the children are so fucked up in this world today. I really feel sorry for the children of the world that have to deal with that kind of crap especially from their parents. I'd be pretty embarrassed if my mother were to do any of the such
What would you guys do in this situation? How do you feel? | Version: This lady on the bus asked the bus driver for directions, the bus driver stated that she was on the wrong bus and gave her proper directions, She was a bitch so I told her that she was being obnoxious and uneducated because of the way she acted. What would you do? How do you feel about this? |
t3_10do9r | Advice | Help, i feel like my step mom is being very unfair... | So, lets start off by saying im a freshman, so, yes, im young, but i still need help. Last night i was watching Netflix in bed (It was about 12) and my stepmom texted me and told me to turn it down, so i put in headphones, problem solved, right? Wrong. Today my dad came and bitched me out about "Respecting other people in the house" but he doesnt seem to get that right when she asked me, i did more than she asked and made it completely silent for her.
so at 10 tonight im browsing reddit and i get the parental controls time block message... I was pissed, so i just plugged into my ethernet and looked up ways to bypass the system. I found out that i can get into the modem and control it, i am at the last step before i get put in charge of the whole houses Wife, i wouldnt be a dick, i would only remove the time block settings. i dont know whether or not to do it. Ive practiced the lie that i'd tell my dad and i think i can get away with it, but i might not... and to be clear, this isn't asking for moral advice, everyone in the house would still have the same privileges, im not screwing anyone over, this would simply be to allow me to watch netflix (With headphones) past 10... Does r/ advice thing i could do it without getting caught? and if i do get caught, is it worth the punishment (Grounded, definitely no internet past 10.) | sepmom put time blocks on wifi, all i want to do is watch netflix at night... Can i put myself as admin without being caught? (Are my lying skills good enough) |
t3_27mzhs | relationships | Me [21 M] and my girlfriend [ 20F] just broke up. What do I do know? | We met in college. Dated for 1.5 years but I knew her for atleast a year prior. We became best friends and started dating. I invested all my time into her and vice-versa. We broke up because we realized didn't love each other and that wasn't going to change. Let me clarify, we did love each other but we were not in love.
I don't know what to do know. She lives near campus and I decided to dorm in the summer to be near her and get some classes done. I made the mistake of putting too much time in my relationship than school so my GPA suffered. The main reason we broke up is because she felt as if she dragged me into her problems and could never repay the favour since I don't have as many problems in my life that I could not handle. We've already talked about how we are a team but she feels selfish.
My biggest fear is that I won't find another. We have the same taste in music, humor and she is very down to earth. We want to remain friends but it will be tough. We also have the same friend group.
How do I move on? | Knew each other for 1 year and dated for 1.5 years. Best friend turned into relationship. Loved each other but were not in love. She felt as if she was dragging me along with her problems and couldn't help me. We're both extremely similar so it's very difficult. How do I move on? |
t3_52qe0z | dogs | [discussion] Dog very injured and I'm emotionally terrified of what might happen | So my dog turned 11 two days ago, we celebrated and he was so happy. I'm 18 now and we basically grew up together and of course have become attached. Yesterday my father went for a daily walk with him and a dog got out and attacked Willie (my dog). He wrapped his teeth around his neck and pushed him to the ground and repeatedly bit him. The dog wouldn't let go and my dad had to get between them to stop it. We took him to the vet and there were three large bites in him and the vet said that if he were a smaller dog he would be dead. So I'm sitting here with him, worried because I don't know what will happen. We are giving him his medication and pressing chargers on the owners of the other dog. I'm scared of losing my dog and I'm really not ready to say goodbye.
Sorry for the long post but I needed to get that off my chest. Here is a pic of the wound if you're curious [wound]( | My dog was attacked and I'm scared he's going to die. I'm really not ready to say goodbye to him. |
t3_31gvao | relationships | Me [29M] with my [27/F] 2yrs, depression, breakup and things | With my SO for 2 years or thereabouts. We are both students in a foreign country (Europe) although she is from outside the EU so life is more complicated for her.
She has been suffering from depression, due to having difficult bosses, doing work she hates and generally being in a poor position as an immigrant. I tried to be supportive, I'm sure I could have done a better job, I got a bit support fatigued though which led to arguments.
The depression made her become extremely antisocial (she wouldn't join me in social events) and caused a massive decline in libido (sex like once every three weeks) both of which were really hard to deal with. She also had bad communication, preferring to sms/message over talking directly and when she got angry/upset she would write (only write) hurtful things to me ("I hate you", "I faked orgasms etc"). I really didn't like that- it isn't something I would do to a partner and although she was usually sorry afterwards she was never able to stop doing it when tensions arose.
Overall, I think the source of arguments was me complaining or otherwise struggling to deal with the behaviors that resulted from her depression.
Despite the bad, but there was a lot of good too and most of the time were very happy together- If she could just have controlled her temper a bit more we really could have been great together.
So now I am divided. I feel in my heart like I could have stuck by her to help her through the depression, despite the hurtful things. But at the same time my mind says I should just stay NC and take care of myself. Tell me r/relationships, what is right? | Relationship ended mutually, heart wants to keep going back but mind says its a bad idea. |
t3_1325fy | needadvice | I am in my final year of highschool, stuck in a country where I can not legally do anything for myself due to citizenship status, and my parents refuse to send me home. | I am a Canadian citizen, living in the United States on an H4 visa; my father is the only person in my family who is legally allowed to work, and my mother is self employed. I will be graduating in May. I want to go home to Canada for University, but my parents insist that I will be happier here and that it would be easier and that they refuse to pay for me to go back home.
I am under the impression that this is strictly a control issue, because none of it makes sense from a logical perspective; I have been miserable and depressed ever since I moved here (the summer between freshmen and sophomore year), and unable to truly make friends because of it. I entered into an abusive relationship which I stayed in for nearly a full year because he was the only person who would give me the time of day. School is also less expensive in Canada, tuitions being 4-6k annually, which is cut in half if you consider the entrance scholarships that I am eligible for. Because of my citizenship status, even if I were to attend a state university, I would be required to pay out of state tuition, which is much more expensive than Canadian tuition.
My parents are aware of all of this, though I am under the impression that they misunderstand the financial workings of university. I also do not see eye to eye with my parents on a wide variety of issues, as they are extremely old fashioned and Christian and conservative, whereas I am liberal, an atheist, and they do not know that I am bisexual. I am forced to keep any and all opinions to myself and I am not happy. I will turn 18 in June. What can I do? | I am a Canadian citizen stuck in America and want to go home. |
t3_3ao4n2 | relationships | I [20 F] only have guy friends. I don't know how to make girl friends. | The post about a girl not having any friends to be her bridesmaids really freaked me out!
When I was younger, I used to have very many close girl friends. In high school, I had some girl friends, but it definitely felt like we were just forced to be around each other a lot. I didn't really connect with anyone. I didn't have any guy friends either.
Now, I'm in a male-dominated program in university. I have lots of guy friends, and ZERO girl friends. I had a girl-friend group in first year, but we had a falling out and now I'm not friends with any of them (it wasn't my fault, I swear).
Now I feel like I don't know how to make girl friends. Guys approach me, and then we become friends. But to become friends with girls.. I have to approach them? It seems so intimidating. I'm in third year, so I feel like everyone has their friend groups established. And there aren't many girls in my program, which makes it even harder.
I don't have any hobbies, and am not in any clubs. I don't wanna join by myself when other people are already going to know each other :'( | I hate being "that girl" who only hangs out with guys. I really really really want to have a girl friend, but don't know how, because I usually only make friends when guys approach me. I don't know how to approach girls. |
t3_3c5lsl | relationships | My close friend [both 20F] is getting married abroad but I don't want to go. Am I being selfish? | We've known each other since teenagers and been through a lot together. She recently got engaged and is planning on having her wedding in Morocco because that's where her family (and fiance) originate. Despite wanting to be there for her special day, there's several reasons why I don't want to go:
1) She has cheated multiple times on her fiance and does not plan on ever telling him. I've always told her I disapproved (but agreed to not tell anyone) but I'm scared I might do something impulsively on the day.
2) I've been to Morocco last yr with her where we stayed with her family and I loathed everything. I'm a city girl through and through, I struggled with the heat, lack of hygiene, mannerisms etc (sorry to any moroccans, nothing personal I just prefer clean concrete type places)
3) I found the residents and her family rude and racist. I am asian, which obviously made me stand out and I was often stared at and had racist remarks shouted at me throughout (to the point where I almost bought a ticket to go home early, it was that bad). Even caught strangers taking pictures of me several times. Her family were civil but I caught them talking about me multiple times when they thought I wasn't aware and I could tell they weren't saying nice things. (I'm not saying everyone there is a racist obviously but the experience was very upsetting and scarring for me).
4) Don't want to waste money on the plane ticket as I am struggling financially (I'm a uni student).
What should I do? Am I just being selfish for not wanting to go (after all it's her wedding day)? | Friend wants to get married to guy she cheated on in Morocco. Don't wanna go cos I hate the place from bad experience and disagree with infidelity. |
t3_152lhf | relationships | I [F21] feel frustrated with my boyfriend's [M24] laziness. Am I justified? | I [F21] have been with my boyfriend [M24] for 2 years, lived with him for one year. Maybe it's just because of finals, but I've been feeling increasingly stressed about life over the past few months and have expressed this to my boyfriend. I have a well paying part time job and also am a full time student. He works full time but doesn't make ends meat, I often times have to cover a few of his expenses, as we live together currently. In addition, it seems to me that all he wants to do is sit around and play video games, or sit around at his friends houses when he's not at work. For example, today, I have been trying to complete an important assignment and he's been playing video games, I asked him to do one bit of housework and he gets so mad saying I'm trying to control him, we should just break up, and when he finished his video game he left without saying goodbye. I feel under appreciated, I spent a lot of time yesterday cleaning the house, paying bills etc and he can't do one bit of housework while I'm stressed about my deadline for school? Feels like he's only concerned with what he has to do. It's not like he never does anything, but still. It would have been nice if he wanted to help me. | My boyfriend doesn't seem to want to help me with anything, even when he sees I'm clearly stressed out. What actions do I need to take to change his behavior? Or is it too late? |
t3_3gdrqo | relationships | Me [19 M, gay] with my close friend/crush [19 M, straight] of 10 months: I don't know what to do! | So it's recently come to my attention that I'm a guy who likes guys, and my current situation for the past 10 months could not have been more difficult.
I met this guy at college about 10 months ago, whom I had a crazy amount in common with. We shared most of the same interests, and were taking almost all of the same classes. I've never had more in common with anyone in my life. We also happen to share MANY of the same beliefs and values, and opinions on things.
On top of that, he is genuinely one of the best looking guys I have ever met, and I am extremely attracted to him. We started talking all the time, and texting constantly, and soon became very close as friends. However, I cannot disregard the fact that ever since the day we met, I have had really strong feelings for him, and feel as if I'm in love. I have been thinking about him everyday for the past 10 months, and my mind never lets me forget him, it is actually quite torturous.
My dilemma of course is that I'm 99.9% sure he is only into girls. I have contemplated telling him regardless, but just don't want to ruin what we have as friends. It's been torturing me for months, but seems to have gotten much worse lately because school is done for the summer and we are only seeing each other once in a while now, even if we do text every day.
What should I do? | I'm in love with my close friend who's a guy, but I'm 99% sure he is only into girls. I still want to tell him how I feel, but don't want to ruin our great friendship. What should I do? |
t3_mpqu4 | AskReddit | A guy pulled a baseball bat out on me and my family today in broad daylight... | Today as my gf and I where taking my mom to the airport at about 3 pm, a truck (a pretty nice one) pulls into the parking lot i take a look as I am walking down the path to the car, and the driver gets out and throws his hands up into the air and yells something (couldnt hear exactly what it was but i heard the word "faggot", so i flipped him the bird thinking nothing of it. Next thing i know i see him grab a baseball bat out of his truck and start running down the path towards us. I get my mom and girlfriend in the car, and he runs up to me and gets in my face, baseball bat in hand. My gf said she could smell booze on him, but i honestly couldnt because of pretty bad allergies so im assuming he was drunk. So, i guess what im asking is, what should i do? >>WITHOUT<< getting the police involved? if i see him again say sorry or something? my gf said she sees the truck somewhat regularly
thanks reddit! | a guy freaked out after i gave him the bird (a move i shouldnt have done in the first place, ill admit) and pulled a baseball bat out on me and my mom and gf in broad daylight. wat do w/o involving the police? |
t3_lm5ow | running | Bad ITBS flare up 3 weeks out from my first marathon. | It happened. I almost knew it would. This morning was my last long run prior to my first marathon (Nov 12th). Around mile 5 I could feel it tightening. By mile 8 I knew. I fucking new. I stopped, stretched, loosened my hips, and felt good . . . for about 100 yards. I ended up walking 7 miles back to my car. I could barely walk at the end.
..
First got ITBS last year. Ran through about a month of pain, then ended up taking 3 mos off. Worked like hell on my hips and glutes (which I still do 2x week), and started running again last October. 1 mile, three times a week. Fast forward. I'm on pace for a 3:40 - 3:50 first marathon. Not great, but at 45, I'd giggle like a school girl. Destroyed my 5K PR last weekend. Things were lining up well. And today, it kind of came crashing down.
..
Here are the options as I see them:
A. Bag it. Stop running for a month and hope for a spring marathon.
B. Cut back to running 1-2 days a week, and hope for the best come Nov 12th.
C. Say "fuck it" and get a cortisone shot (or something) to numb the fucker out and deal with the consequences later.
So, rather than taking up smoking and eating 10 gallons of ice cream, I turn to you all for advice. | My leg hurts too badly to run 3 wks out from my first marathon. |
t3_1clnic | pettyrevenge | Cut in line? Good luck shoplifting! | A little backstory:
My school (a connected middle school/high school) has a breakfast every morning. Not mandatory, but you can go if you want some breakfast in the morning and you don't eat at home like me. Also, the kid I'm about to discuss a little sixth grader I'll call "Mason" to protect his real name. This kid is an asshole. He slammed my brothers finger in a locker just to be an asshole, and my brother bled for 7 straight hours, no exaggeration, before we eventually had to take him to the emergency room.
Now, on with the story:
I went to breakfast and got my food and the line was crazy, but I waited in line like everybody else. I finally get to the front of the line and this kid decides he needs to be right in front of me so he just waltzes his ass right in front of me. I tell him I was standing there and he says to me "Cool."It's too early for this shit, so I began to think revenge. That's when I saw him slip an apple in the inside pocket of his vest. I knew my revenge would be simple but embarrassing. He checks out and I check out two people after him, because he jumped in front of someone else. As I'm checking out I'm sure to mention Mason's apple he slipped in his pocket.
Not one minute later people are yelling at him to go back and see the cashier. He was sitting at his table with his head down the rest of breakfast. As I walked by to go to my first class, I made sure to give him a nice "Ha!" right in his face. | Asshole kid cuts me in line, steals apple, and I make sure he gets caught stealing. |
t3_448ifg | relationships | I'm [22m] still depressed after breaking up with her [19f] 2 months ago. | Its been 2 months since I broke up with my girlfriend of 6 months and I still feel terrible. There are days where I don't feel that bad but I think about her from time to time, then there are days like today where I can't get her out of my head and I feel REALLY depressed.
I live in New York but I went to the UK for Christmas because that's where my family lives. While I was there I felt depressed but I had some good days. When I got back I felt worse because I'm walking through all the places I used to walk with her but now she's not here and it all feels empty.
I tried hanging out with friends but it's not the same, I feel like I need her 😕 | I still feel bad after 2 months of breaking up, hanging out with anyone else doesn't help either. |
t3_nwu8y | AskReddit | Alright Reddit, What is the worst/craziest thing you've ever done at a party? | I only think it is fair I should begin.
So growing up in a small town everybody knows everybody but once in awhile we got a rare chance to go to these massive house parties out in the country. These parties were usually thrown by really rich kids with massive houses and tons of money to throw away and what was my favorite part was that since these kids were in a different school district we never really knew them or had to see them on a regular basis.
So we're at this party having a great time and what not but like I'm prone to do I drink waaay to much and pass out. So I'm laying on the sofa when suddenly its like Jesus himself brings me forth and is like "Steve, you need to piss NOW". So I jump up.
Y'know when you need to piss but there is like this subconscious countdown that begins in your head? You're like "I gotta pee...but I got like 5 minutes until systems go critical." Well I just woke up from my beer-coma and systems were beyond critical.
So I start running towards my best guess where a bathroom might be but as this is a massive house I get a little lost. I run into a dark room and think "Fuck it. I'm not peeing myself." So I whip down my pants and start peeing.
I hear this weird hissing noise but I'm too busy feeling relieved to care so once I'm done I zip up and walk away.
A few minutes later people are saying they can smell something really rank, kinda like piss. I can smell it too.
So this smell is permeating throughout the house and everyone is talking about it trying to find the source. Finally this girls who's throwing the party Dad comes down and starts investigating.
He comes back a few minutes later red as a child's freshly spanked bottom and screams "WHO PISSED ON THE FURNACE!?"
I've never ran so fast in my life. | Got super drunk, passed out, had to take emergency piss and pee'd on the furnace causing the smell of stinky urine to permeate the house. |
t3_1ebk9u | offmychest | I just saw my ex boyfriend for the first time in a year. | We had an extremely emotionally intense relationship. Together for 2 years, lived together for the second year. We didn't have a crazy break up, we were both so numb and exhausted that we just said this is it and kind of drifted away after I moved out. But we still were kind and respectful to each other. I think of him often and what he's doing, hope the best for him. He got in touch with me on Friday and I went to his house on Sunday. We both have new dogs and we took them to the levee nearby (we live in south Louisiana) to run. We didn't do anything physical, just had a long hug when I left. But it's left me in a state of confusion. Part of me misses him a lot because we were good friends and were there for each other when a lot of crazy shit was happening. But part of me knows that he is too intense and I'm really not equipped to emotionally handle him without throwing myself into depression and anxiety. I know I got closure from the experience, but I don't think it was the closure I wanted/expected. Part of me still hopes we can be together one day, but now I'm more aware than ever that it probably will never happen (and that's probably a good thing). I've never been the type to play with fire, but for the first time I want to ignore what I know about us as couple and try it again (because when we were good, we were AMAZING). | I'm conflicted about my ex because seeing him made me realize that sometimes what you think you want isn't what's good for you. |
t3_3pqvy2 | tifu | TIFU by keeping my teeth allergy free | This one actually just happened to me, so...
Context: I'm allergic to *something* but the doctors aren't able to figure out what it is. In the meantime, I have to take a prescription hive cream.
It's the middle of the night, and I was hungry. I decided to make a peanut butter sandwich. After I ate, I remembered I needed to brush my teeth again.
As I reached for the toothpaste, my sleep deprived brain grabbed the hive cream, and squeezed it all over my toothbrush. I got halfway into brushing when I noticed something tasted funny. I realized what happened and began violently spitting out what was in my mouth.
The taste only got worse as I was rinsing out my mouth. I didn't swallow any, but just in case, I leave all of my inheritance to my cat. | Don't brush your teeth with antihistamines. |
t3_43ti13 | relationships | I'm [25 M] seeing this Girl [24F] for a month, doesn't do oral.. | Throwaway for obvious reasons.
Now I've posted here because no, I haven't spoken to her about this and would like some advice.
Been seeing this girl, let's call her Stacey, for about a month or so. She's attractive, great personality, respectful job etc. Things have been good so far, however, we've had sex 10 times so far and every time I've gone down on her for 20 minutes at a time (I have no problem with this as I find it a turn on too) she obviously likes it, but then it just turns into sex. She hasn't gone down on me once yet, which I respect but I'm wondering what's putting her off? I know for some people that's not their thing etc but how should I go about talking to her about it respectfully? | Seeing girl for a month, I go down on her every time, having great sex, she still hasn't gone down on me.. |
t3_30b633 | relationships | Me[20F] and ex[24M] he got married, had a baby, but still wont leave me alone. Should I tell his wife? | I was gonna use a throwaway but fuck it. About 15 months ago I started talking to a guy and we went on ONE date. The whole "relationship" lasted only 1 month. Well , he would only talk to me in "baby talk" about everything. He would speak to me like I was an actual infant. I hated that and told him to stop like 1,000 times but he never did so I broke it off. Next day he showed up to my college crying, and he proposed to me. Yes, you heard that right. He proposed after barely a month... After I dumped him. Obviously I said no and moved on with my life , blocking him on all social medias. So he starts dating some girl and shes pregnant within a month. Well here we r now. He has found my new number and keeps begging me to meet to have sex with him. He even confesses he married that girl with the ring he proposed to me with.
So reddit should I tell his wife all this? He has a little baby and I'd feel horrible if I some how made a kid lose time with her dad. But at the same time Id want to know if my husband did that to me | ex got married, proposed to girl with used ring. Still won't leave me alone. Do I tell his wife?? |
t3_1juaz7 | relationships | Me[21F] and my boyfriend of a year [21M] are starting to face a long distance relationship and I don't know how to handle it | Me and my boyfriend have been friends for four years and dating for a year, the past year has been one of the best years of my life. We don't fight we communicate wonderfully and everything has been great. We talk about our future a lot and can honestly see ourselves getting married once we are out of school in two+ years.
This fall I am moving for school and we will be a few hours apart and I will be without a car and will be working, he is also in school and has a job. We both know that because of school, the distance, and the difference in our schedules that we will not be able to see each other often, we have decided that we are willing to try. However, I am scared that the distance will turn what we have sour, and i'm not sure if we should risk what we have becoming ugly, i'm wondering if we should end it to preserve the wonderful times we have had. We have discussed separating because we both I think realize that it is probably the most logical thing to do but neither of us want to.
My questions for you reddit is have any of you gone through a similar situation and if so how did you and your SO cope? Are we crazy to spend two years basically apart when we have only been dating for one? If you have been in a LDR what are some things you and your partner did in order to stay together happily? | Me and my SO who is the man of my dreams are going to be long distance for two+ years, not sure what we should do |
t3_36rr3e | relationships | I [25 F] think that the guy I've been seeing for a couple months [39 M] is hiding a smoking habit from me. | Short backstory: I've known him for about 4.5 years, he got divorced last year, we've been seeing each other for about two months. As long as I've known him I've never seen him smoke. It's not a secret that I absolutely hate the habit (cigarettes). I just think it's disgusting and I personally don't (usually) date guys that smoke. I just prefer not to be grossed out by a guy I'm dating.
I went to his place this past Saturday and saw a pack of cigarettes and I asked him about it, and he said that he has occasionally had one when he gets drunk, but rarely, and that he meant to throw the pack out.
Last night we went out to the bar and after a little while he asked if I minded if he went to make a phone call he forgot to make earlier. When he came back inside, I thought I caught a whiff of it, and he sat a little further away from me than usually for ~20 minutes or so. Looked like he may have had a pack in his pocket, but I didn't see it so I can't be sure. That was the one and only time I've suspected it.
I realize in the grand scheme of things that this isn't a huge deal, but I'm not sure what to do. I like him enough at this point that I wouldn't break things off because of it, but I'm not even sure how to bring it up. I'm big on honesty, and he hasn't lied to me or anything as far as I can tell, so I'm not worried about that. Do I bring it up? Do I just ignore it for now and see if it even becomes an issue? Sorry for my /r/relationships equivalent of a first world problem! | I think he's hiding a new smoking habit because he knows I hate it, and I'm not sure how to proceed. |