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i don t know if i have depression anymore a few year ago i wa convinced i did since i didn t have much joy left in my hobby game or many show and i know when this thing all started back in primary school i m in uk there wa this autistic kid named patrick he appeared nice at the beginning but i had a bad feeling about him i felt bad that i did since he wa autistic and back then i wa told that you should never judge someone because of appearance or disability for that i wanted to be his friend along with everyone else after a few day of trying i realised why i had the bad feeling it turned out that patrick wa a bully and he always called me name and pushed me and hit me every time i wa even near him and of course i went to a teacher guess what they did drumroll nothing they said he couldn t help it because he wa autistic this went on for a year after a year of this the other boy in the class joined in and called me name and i only had friend through all of this let call one b and the other l when i wa hanging out with b she offered a sweet they had one of and i wa thankful for her kindness the next day b told l that i stole it from her and i now lost my only friend another year of this and still nothing but i had one friend we ll call her m m wa a girl i liked i matured fast after a while of hanging out with m i asked her to be my girlfriend and she said yes month of more bullying but being with m i wa sad about not having friend but happy that i wa with m m slowly stopped hanging out with me and soon enough she started hanging out with b month later me and m were over m wa always talking to b i talked to no one i stopped going outside apart from school whenever m asked me to come outside i never said yes anymore i just sunk myself into a rabbit hole of youtube video p game and especially fortnite when it wa popular after summer holiday i went back to school and i gave up on making friend or doing work that year i always got mad whenever someone insulted me and i walked out of the classroom still teacher did nothing they actually called my carers and said i might have autism or anger issue absolutely ignoring the fact i wa being bullied right in front of them it definitely didn t help that the teacher for our class wa always on the girl side and soon enough i felt like i wanted to murder some of my classmate and i forgot to mention that i became friend with one of the boy that bullied me last year but he didn t really talk to me much after i started reading news story about depression abuse treatment of kid mental health etc and i came to the conclusion that adult couldn t help in this situation so i had to stop my anger before it even started i tried to stop sleeping because i thought if i wa tired enough my brain would be to weak to show emotion i soon enough had no friend didn t get much sleep didn t go outside apart from school and that s only through the course of and a half year primary i decided i wa gon na better myself and actually do my work i got to level in subject i talked to my friend more i became friend with m again after m and b had a fight they stopped being friend so in that year the teacher were the true problem and patrick of course let s call teacher one c and no d d wa the one i hated the most d intentionally made fun of the fact my dad left my mother when i wa born d also heard patrick call me name and hit me and breathe in my face multiple time i burst out of the room and went outside then d found me and acted like he didn t know what happened the deliberately said get back inside or i ll call your dad that made me so angry that i shouted right in his face and i went back inside angrily patrick still annoyed me and still teacher ignored it after covid erupted we went off school and it wa great skip to primary and patrick finally started getting in trouble by one teacher only teacher c after a while of him actually getting in trouble he came up with a plan he decided to tell teacher c to go home and kill themself and when it happened teacher c went out with watering eye and the head teacher came in and said to him patrick that s not nice don t say it again teacher c still got him in trouble and he gave up on stopping her nothing much happened that year he still bullied me but i tuned all of it out since i couldn t care anymore nor could i get angry anymore all my anger wa used up now i m in s and people call me emo just because of my long fringe no one want to be friend with me everyone annoys me for no reason most of my primary school friend are no longer talking to me i gave up do i have depression
1
sorry for the clickbait title i just really want to share call this number if you re feeling down and hopefully it ll lift your spirit 0 99 0 i saw it on instagram
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this person mean the world to me so this hurt more than i can ever describe from what they have told me they haven t really struggled with mental illness so how do i make them understand
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i m glad i m not alone period depression is real
1
i have been struggling with anxiety and panic attack for most of my life but i finally seem to have gotten a handle on it for the time being i still have stress and anxiety from time to time but the panic attack are much le frequent i actually can t remember when i last had one and i used to have them a lot and when they do come i m better able to handle them so i ve been able to get out into the world a bit more now but there is one problem that is still lingering from when i wa more anxious i can t tell whether my desire to say no to certain thing is because i genuinely don t want to do it or because of anxiety although i wouldn t call myself agoraphobic anymore i still always have the automatic urge to say no to anything anyone asks me to do i understand that about myself and usually it s enough to give myself some time to think it over or not think about it at all and then i m able to decide that it is actually something i wanted to do i am just nervous but lately i ve been feeling this intense urge to avoid doing certain thing and i don t know if it s because my anxiety is creeping back in or because i just don t want to do them my mind tell me i just don t want to but a you all know our mind are not always the best reference for example i moved from the u to italy and i finally mustered up the courage to join a book club in my new town to try to make some friend here the other member are italian but we all discus the book in english which is awesome because i can speak more freely that way i wa really anxious the first time but it turned out to be great it wa really fun and i couldn t wait to go again until right before the next meeting when i got anxious again again it wa fine though and this happened three or four time but every time i wa actually at the book club i wasn t anxious the only problem wa the anticipation but after the first couple meeting the book club itself started to be le enjoyable aside from one or two other member no one is very nice or talkative and hardly anyone read the book and for the last few meeting we have only discussed depressing and completely unrelated to the book thing like war and death and covid all the thing i read and go to the book club to escape from for a while also my being american apparently make me like an ambassador and the leader of the group keep asking me for the american opinion on this or what this or that is like in america and i usually have to tell them about stuff that isn t great like health care police brutality issue etc it isn t fun anymore and there is also the added problem of the leader of the book club sending me message outside the group asking me to edit her assignment she ha to do for a magazine and while she s way over the top with her gratitude about it i feel like she is just using me which is making me not want to go even more so now every time there is a meeting coming up i again get that feeling like i don t want to go but now i m thinking i might just genuinely not want to go because it s not fun not just because of the anticipatory anxiety last time i actually skipped it but i felt the same kind of guilty feeling i feel when i skip something because i m anxious this week there s another meeting and again i just don t want to go even though i read the book but i don t know if i should push through it and see if it s a better meeting this time or just listen to my gut and skip it again and or quit the club i really wanted it to be good though because i love book and i wa hoping to make friend here doe anyone have any advice tl dr how do you tell the difference between not wanting to do something because of anxiety and just not wanting to do it when you can t trust your own gut to tell you
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fighting off the hungries
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yinkapost he went into depression i think
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how can i leave my abusive relationship and still keep my cat i ve been suicidal and right now my cat is the only part of my life that make me want to be alive i don t have anywhere to go and currently live alone with my bf thing started becoming physical when i called him out for cheating now i feel unsafe and desperately want to get away i m sure we re going to be losing our place due to not having money to pay rent i m wondering if anyone had resource out there where i can get help to leave and still keep my cat with me thank you to any who help
1
year ago i wa a grade student this is probably the funniest class i have ever had before diving in to depression next school year http t co u ufvp ea
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just about to leave for another exciting day at work
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stephenkruiser awww so sad i m so sorry
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too tired to leave bed
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i just can t take it i didn t even have serious trauma it wa my fault and still i can t get over it it s been three year i said i forgave him for forcing me to have sex so many time so many month so many thing i wa young i didn t know how sex should work i didn t even consider my voice mattered i m so sorry for my younger self i didn t help her and now everything is my fault i just will never be able to love someone again to have any sexual intimacy i miss who i wa romantic passionate innocent i m just starting to realize how everything i do is related to this how can i be so slow the nightmare the panic attack when i feel my voice isn t listened to how i keep getting drunk and letting some random dude fuck me because it give them pleasure if i start it maybe it mean i am in control if i have sex maybe it mean it wasn t such a big deal but i can t take it sober i have only had sex sober once and drunk way too many i hurt so much the day after i try to forget can t take it anymore i can t forget all these people touching me how much they enjoy it i did this myself i let them i wa never raped it s my fault i m this miserable i want to hate those guy i think i do but i let them some people consider they only lost their virginity the first time they actually wanted to have sex it s funny to think i can be a virgin after so many time no one need to read this i m sorry i just need to say it at least once i can never say it up to recently i didn t even believe anything had happened i know i don t deserve any sympathy after how i did this myself i don t need any just hear me out
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i totally just lied about going on a trip to get out of hanging out with someone airport wa the only excuse that came to mind
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going to the dentist again i mean tooth spa right valeriekhoo
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d trix my mom just had a root canal also i feel your pain buddy
0
i don t really have any kind of hope that any other kind of love can truly save you it ha to be romantic because you don t trust friend or family when they tell you that the love you anymore but if someone is willing to hold you and stay with you for the rest of your life just the initiative make it feel better but my problem doesn t even lie there the real problem is that i don t really see myself a someone that can be loved and the reason are endless i m not good looking i have severe social anxiety and i m just a handful of a person to deal with haha and i definitely am not a person that should have been born and even the one time i gave my heart to someone and tried to get to know them better with the hope of igniting something real it wa a fail and i can t help that i have no will left in me to live i don t think writing this post will really achieve anything ultimately but well it would be nice if someone could try to understand me
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too much to do not enough motivation
0
the great depression
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hi everyone i m new to this sub and am just seeking advice support this weekend i entered into a huge depressive episode after not having one for many month i struggle with depression anxiety and ocd but it s been getting better a i ve built a routine and stuff like that this week though i had some personal issue one of which wa feeling heartbroken by a very manipulative ex and trying to get myself out of that rut the other is having to move back to my college town i am from a large city that i feel very much at home in and at college i have literally no friend and hate the small town where it s located it feel toxic for me and i never know what to do with myself i never go out and mostly just sleep to pas time today i had a particularly hard time going back cried my eye out began to feel this raw sense of loneliness and longing had trouble saying goodbye to family etc with my anxiety i also struggle with being worried that my family will die before we see each other next which is a whole other issue but it doe complicate thing can anyone help and provide some advice i do go to therapy and am not open to taking medication right now mostly i m just wondering what people do when they feel these profoundly heavy episode since it s been a while for me what is your go to activity how do you take care of yourself and get back on your foot any tip for detoxing from the internet social medium i think this might trigger me to think about my ex and stuff thank you and sending love to all
1
i wish i succeeded those few year ago i wa so close but pussied out and hurt my neck pretty badly i wish i just kept up there for a few more minute then i wouldn t have had to deal with the absolute failure of a person that i am i want to end it i m useless and a horrible piece of shit i ve done some pretty bad shit and no matter how hard i try to fix thing to try and get my life together it just doesn t work i m now physically sick all the time in pain homeless and stuck in a fucking town i wish would burn to the ground i get bullied and mocked by the entire shitty as street i m in for being under a homeless organization for whole year i ve been begging for a house begging and begging asking for this asking for that can i please try and get this house no u can t can i please try and get this house no it all taken i ll never leave this hellhole i ll never get better nothing will ever get better so what s the actual point i m even too lazy to fucking kill myself even though i have the perfect plan grab my rope grab all my pill and favourite alcohol walk to the wood with my favorite stuffie and end it all by the place i felt peace for the first time i ll watch the water of the lake and then i ll finally be at peace and no more pain no more sorrow no more bullshit just nothing but no i m too tired to walk it i m too tired to write a letter i m too fucking tired to do it the reason why i haven t done it i need to take care of my boyfriend i don t care for anyone else because all of them are lying fuck but him i need to stay strong so he get a home so he can live happily but i don t know maybe my death can boost his chance of getting a better life it may hurt now but maybe my death will grab attention to him and then he ll get all the help he need might a well just got ta pick a date
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lol what anna schmance i soo wan na meet up with you in the holiday man haha im missing you so bad
0
um ok first time on reddit but i need some help or advice or something sorry for the long post in advance i just need to get this of my chest i can t talk about my interest without feeling like i m going to barf no matter who it is it s especially bad when i m trying to talk to my parent my brother love music he s always talking about it and we re supper close but i only recently started saying hey i know like that song when he s playing music he begs me to share my spotify with him but i just cant i know he won t judge me but i don t even think i m scared of being judged another time he asked to borrow my computer for school work and i panicked i have nothing to hide but i watch a lot of show and read a lot of comic so i save the tab so i can finish them later and got scared he would see them i said no multiple time and he kept asking he wouldn t stop i tried explaining to him explaining to him how i wa feeling multiple time and he just got angry and said alright what are you hiding and i panicked i didn t want him to think i wa hiding something so i just let him use it it wa fine but i felt sick for the rest of the day i also don t like being on my phone around people especially my parent i know they go through my stuff they ve never said anything about it but they ll mention stuff i ve only talked about online hi guy if you reading this o pls leave me alone my mom wanted to show me something so she asked to use my phone and i panicked because i wa on twitter and i have a account i post art on and i didn t want her to see none of my family or irl friend know about it because i m so embarrassed i said no but she just reached for it she didn t see my twitter though she wa really angry and started saying i wa hiding something i got my phone back though and i tried explaining why i get so defensive about my phone but she couldn t understand i almost cried there s so many time i ve seen something in the store i want but just couldn t ask i can t be on my phone without thinking that someone s watching me through it or i accidentally sense that post i liked to someone s contact or i m broadcasting what ever one my phone to everyone around me i have a habit of biting down on my tongue all the time because i m scared i m thinking out loud and just can t here myself i m always paranoid and my family think i m hiding something no one know any of my interest outside of my vague answer like oh i like art i like watching movie i play video game and i think it s starting to affect my relationship what s wrong with me
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i lost a coworker to suicide i wa the last person he talked to at work i wonder if that ha made me think about ending it after what happened a i explained in my post about me be bisexual the leap to this mind set did not seem a far any comment would be good it http good it feel so scary bein g in this mindest
1
arse totally forgot about a webinar that i wanted to attend this morning now i ll never know how to secure virtualised environment
0
on a day work week fast forward to thursday please
0
sad to hear about the discovery of the little girl from tracy her poor family
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just one hug to relief depression
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br karl lauterbach bundeskanzler c lindner ziehen wir mal milliarden von den 00 milliarden f r bundeswehr ab sonst kommen die an au dem frust in die depression da wird volkswirtschaftlich teuer
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hi i m an yr old guy from germany i had a quite good childhood exept that i wa bullied my low class in school and didn t have any friend now i have quite many friend and a good place to work but anytime i am alone i overthink everything and that make me sad my friend say that i am one of the happiest and funniest person they know but when i am alone it s the complete different i worry about my friendship my loved one and my family and that i am not good for this world i mean i am nice to everyone and try to make everyone happy but the most don t give back anything and i can t be mean to them and ignore them because my heart won t let me that make me think a lot i think i really need a person that i can talk to when i am sad and lonely
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mraow i feel like dancing but first art school want to rape me some more
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black btrfly bref ya beaucoup de choses la chose a surtout pa faire c est rester solo parske la d pression arrive tr s tr s vite
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if your anxiety is attached to your career goal doe success or validation relieve it
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reannaremick doesnt work on my cell go to sleep p
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in this day and age doctor shouldn t take this long with result
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louislucci i usually only sleep hour a night or so going to bed now have to get up at am
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i struggle with school having to take all honor and ap class at home my parent insult me and treat me like a tool making me pick up their slack they give me the same excuse saying that since they work i need to do something my mom and step dad also think that my study are the most important thing in the world a i cant go out with friend having three sibling that are 0 year younger than me also build up this stress my family issue also include me not knowing my real dad my mom never told me anything about him but snooping through her phone let me know he in jail in another country i cant take my family anymore and i wan na cry but i cant my friend dont understand since they have loving family and big home the only person i can talk to is my closest friend but knowing that she ha her own issue worry me i have not cried ever since th grade and when i do it me tearing up i cant feel happiness anymore nor sadness it just me hating my family even more sport and videogames arent a good escape for me anymore a i lost interest in it and keeping up good grade to impress my parent make me want to cry but i cant i dont know anymore and im stooping really low talking on reddit i wish i could cry but i physically cant
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i had a migraine and now i can t sleep boo
0
being border restricted victim day by day we getting engulfed in frustration depression suicidal attempt and much more that we can t express in word depression fmwangyisaveindianstudents takeusbacktochina
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also still struggling to ask my parent to help me set up for an adhd diagnosis a well a for my mental health a much a i say i do have thing like adhd depression and anxiety i haven t officially confirmed that it suck that i do because i can t get the support i need
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why i have to think about thing i am thinking about is this a punishment what did i do to you you are torturing me exactly why i have to think about death existence hollowness loneliness unwanted people like me and why are some more popular then others i have no friend so i have to talk to myself the worst person alive i hate this person he is only negative doesn t like anything why i see only one solution there is nothing but hollowness for u this is place for popular talkative handsome and over all good people so maybe next time i will be luckier i hate my mind and myself
1
i have not felt normal in month i have not had a day in month my chest hasn t felt like it wa compressing on itself or a day that my heart doesn t thud through my chest i tried to figure myself out i tried to use resource but it so fucking hard to reach out when you feel like shit i attempted via shrooms to figure it out fucking stupid to some people i know half my trip wa good half i shook trapping myself into a corner a my jaw clenched the next day i felt great like i conquered something i told a friend that i didn t want to die i want to live two day later i am screaming in my room pissed off i hate myself i am actually going to go buy some fucking razor because my huge knife is dull it never going to end is it this fucking demonic shit will never leave me and it make me feel so horrible the dread of any task the feeling no one really want you there the anxiety you get when you talk to much about something your passionate about i can feel when someone distance themselves and they just did now my brain go a million mile an hour wondering what the fuck is wrong with me i no longer will trust anyone i can t take the feeling of it being able to end in disaster i hate my life i hate how i hurt people and can t fix them i hate how i stared in the mirror tripping ball but did not feel scared or mad or terrified i looked at a broken man trying to reach out and help the man i saw the stranger
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anyone else get super cold mainly hand and foot when stressed
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i can t sleep there s a fight outside how inconsiderate i wan na go sleep
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bobbyly nah gentleman i got class at am on wednesday but thanks anyway lt
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i m trying to figure out if this is an anxiety thing i have been thinking that i may have adhd and i know this is a symptom of it but my therapist say that she won t test me for it bc anxiety can mimick adhd i go through these period every few week or some time every few day i m either really motivated and will do a million thing in a day and clean shower hang out w friend everyday but if this go on for too long i get extremely depressed and burnt out this happened friday i wa so motivated i went to work then the gym then cleaned then saturday i wa out all day something not normal for me sunday wa the same i worked then went out w friend spent all day with friend monday and tuesday worked then went to the gym but now i m extremely depressed and my room is so messy and i don t have any energy and just want to lay in bed for day and not talk to anyone i thought this wa an anxiety v depression cycle but now i think it s sort of a manic like v depression burn out cycle i m just looking to see if anyone can relate it s so hard to keep a job bc of these period of burn out no matter what stage i am in the cycle i m still extremely anxious i just have more motivation to push through it when i m at that point in the cycle
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vinpocetine for depression symptom amp mood disorder relief http t co zapfkyxdg9 http t co hqhozyg u
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suilin nobuuuuuuu you evil evil girl
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sorry about message n such i have been stewing in my apartment depression napping tryna will myself to feel better though tomorrow i will try to be functional
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i feel so anxious about school and suddenly there are so many people who reaching out to me for help and thing like that my mind just can t seem to calm down i feel like cry and vomitting at the same time but i can t take a break cause of school deadline i just want this madness to stop
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freshly squeezed lied they only showed the video in the end
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idk how to elaborate on it i just started suddenly cry for no real reason and couldn t stop for like 0 minute doe anyone else have this problem i m just wondering
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marley and me i am cry like a kid but a good movie have a good night people
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don t let depression slow you down we got this
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going to sleep hoping to wake up and tommorow will be wednesday instead of tuesday i really don t want to go to work
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i can t tell if i m actually enjoying life or i m just dancing to distract myself from the depression atp amthoughts
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i m currently an art student at university and i m trying to pas the year but my anxiety coupled with my low self worth ha made it dangerously difficult to complete any kind of task or face up to any kind of challenge it s already taking what i have to take care of myself everyday and to give myself break whenever thing get tough but my work demand a lot and i want to get through it but whenever i look at what i have to do the thing i need to do i shut down i can t imagine myself ever completing these task or accomplishing thing and this is my last chance at university or i have to drop out i don t think i could take that kind of failure i want to be able to sit down and work hard face the challenge and either fail and try again or triumph and move onto the next so much of me is tied to the confidence i have in a task on a good day i ll create something i never thought i d do on my own but those day are rare i ve tried therapy but i can t afford it anymore and free healthcare here mean waiting month for a chance at a session ha anyone felt something similar to this or know what could help so far just typing this out ha helped a bit
1
hello i have this issue that s been happening more and more frequently a of late starting off back in the office i wa extremely anxious but i found that when i got there i usually always got excited and talkative for about an hour after which i start crashing it feel a like i start sinking into emptiness i get self conscious my selfless esteem crumbles and i start feeling depressed this happens regularly and follows me back home i don t know what to do or how i can mitigate this any advice would be greatly appreciated thank you
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can t smell tyson any more
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chi u nay h p chu n b t ch c m y s ki n tr ng bao nhi u vi c
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nasty scraping noise from the back of my car
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karinhoegh so true i love frienfeed but there are so many cool apps out there that delivers value and so little time
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acummings i ve got return ticket booked for this weekend if the exchange rate wasn t so bad i d go but don t mind missing it really
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theekween depression
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i do not want to wake up tomorrow
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i ve had anxiety a long a i can remember and it not like it ruin my life but i feel i could be doing much better socially and academically if i took a pill that just got rid of it im a college athlete who work out eats right and is in great shape so i truly believe i just have a chemical imbalance that cause my anxiety to act up especially in low action situation such a a classroom this is also spot on with my adhd diagnosis but those med don t help my anxiety all i hear is that when you get on those pill you got ta stop drinking and shit i smoke weed everyday drink heavily every weekend and do coke mushroom acid pretty seldomly anyone got advice for anti anxiety med that aren t going to ruin my brain if i want to drink or do my recreational drug still im even willing to quit the drug and slow down on my booze and weed i just dont want to quit for good
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i feel like something is broken in me i do not function a well a others getting up going to work doing my online school all of it is exhausting i cut corner everywhere i can but i m also obsessed with making sure the corner i cut look good on paper i don t actually want to do anything ever i could sit at home all day everyday and do nothing i say i have dream but every time i get some pushback i give up i give myself a pat on the back for doing the shit i m supposed to it make me feel broken and wrong how do people learn the discipline to just get up and do what they re supposed to do everyday how do they just keep going what am i missing
1
gulshan hinaaltaf cylinder ka rate badhane se depression se kaise bahar aate hain doctor saheb koi sir pair hai teri baat ka
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just got up and nappy very wet and split at the back going for a nice baby bath and then back in nappy i go
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thelmarockz thelma i can t see shiz i see blank and me and u comment
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quite busy today attended appointment well tomorrow going to be another busy day
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finally decided to give it a try wish me luck
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the suicide hotline take hour to respond i ve fucked up every relationship that i had by trying to be funny and the other person being creepy and lied to everyone i know why should i continue self harm doesn t do anything anymore nothing brings me joy i have no future because of my mental problem really why do i stay here the one reason i still live is because around new year an online friend of mine at the time attempted suicide i got so fucked up then i couldn t function properly for a week i couldn t talk to anyone the one reason i am still here is because i thought people would feel that way about me but a ive lived and breathed i have come to realise that isn t true my friend will be glad i am not around them the only disappointment they will feel is that they don t have a vulnerable little shit to kick around my family will be glad that the failure in the family is finally gone and the school will pretend to be sad for a month make it about how mental health is important tell people to be kind about one another then forget about me i won t stand out im another human being in the 00 billion that exist i don t even know if im real i don t want to be here so might a well leave
1
it the holiday and i still bloody insist on waking up at school time
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y a une mamie de mon glise qui m a dit tu n est pa blanche la d pression c est pa pour toi
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mauricedb i tried the sitecom one to but felt to toy like
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theekween depression anxiety heart break thelmasherbs
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preface im f and currently in community college so i have gad undiagnosed but pretty obvious and i feel like im inexperienced in working and doing thing on my own in real life and most of it stem from social anxiety i heard alot of people from tiktok who say that their social anxiety got better once they started working retail or fast food because they were forced to talk to other people on a regular basis so my question is did getting a part time job help with your social anxiety
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what can i do to help me with chest pain and uncomfortable chest please im desesperate
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i sleep plenty i drink plenty of water and i eat pretty healthy no matter what i do though i m exhausted and just want to nap all the time i m seeing my psychiatrist this friday so hopefully i can find some answer but ha anyone experienced this or have some advice i have taken a couple of blood test too but the result were normal everything wa fine
1
tw somewhat mention of blood and scarring idk if this is linked to anxiety or whatnot but i constantly find myself picking at my lip and finger especially when i get really anxious i hate how it s left my lip scarred and bloody but i just can t seem to stop i ve tried putting chapstick on to prevent peeling so i wouldn t pick but it never lasted more than a couple week also my finger look pretty bad when i wa younger i would rip the white part of my fingernail off but now i just rip the surrounding skin until they bleed and scab i mean everytime i feel anxious and nervous i keep my hand together and in front of me which eventually lead to me picking at my finger i already have pretty bad social anxiety so the thought of people being able to see my awful hand and lip make me feel worse man something is really wrong with me tbh
1
i know i m not i m fully aware that i m not dying the problem is the fact that it feel extremely difficult to breathe even though i know nothing is wrong my lung are genuinely taking in all the air that they can and i don t have any medical issue there s no pressure around my rib yet i feel trapped i feel like i m running out of breath and it s making me panic and that in itself is making it even harder to breathe i feel on the verge of a panic attack even my posture is fine ha anyone else felt this weird out of breath sensation it feel like no matter how much air i take in it s not enough
1
mutesi lydie ese niba rbc isohora report ivugako murwanda million zabaturage nibura babana na depression cg nikihe gihugu gifite amateka nkayurwanda ahantu ugera urumushitsi ukajyanwa gusura inzibutso nawe ubwawe ukavayo urira nyine utishimye so in some case the report is 00 ok
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i f 0 lb think i m having heart burn right now though i m not sure at around 00 today i suddenly started getting a weird chest pain it s not severe pain more like a mild dull stabbing pain that only last in certain position if i lay a certain way the chest pain will go away however i feel the pain a little bit in my left shoulder blade just for a few second i m worrying that i m having a heart attack i know that heart burn is associated with a burning sensation i wouldn t describe the pain a burning it s now 9 pm and i am still feeling this i tried to take a tum but tum are way too gross to me and i can t stomach them are there way to differentiate between a heart attack and heart burn anxiety is convincing me that i m having a heart issue even though i just got an echocardiogram done le than a week ago and it wa normal help please i would just be safe and go to the er but that cost so much money and i ve been to the er three time this year so far because of my health anxiety they re gon na end up banning me lol i should mention that i am on metoprolol currently for high heart rate due to severe anxiety if that mean anything
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riry is being a pain and nomming on my hand should not have sprayed her with that cat nip mist a a joke now she is craaaazy
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i used to enjoy posting and just interacting with people but now i can t bring myself to open it up it s just awful seeing post and post of people just living while i m just existing stagnant it all feel so counterfeit
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oh man i can t find a tenori on anywhere what am i going to do
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i miss watching rocko s modern life
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shantelleb so ha mine
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it s been year since i ve any kind of intimate relationship i ve tried over and over and over to get a girl of any kind and it always end the same they leave me on read or open within two day and honestly i m just a huge loser and i m ready to crash my car and die so if anyone would like to know why i did it there it is i m a fucking failure
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oishiieats
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ooooh lol that leslie and ok i won t do it again so leslie won t get mad again
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would rather the first party send bad message than the rd party send mixed one sophmore year all over again
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is sad watching himym sea so i can be cool like everyone else but not feeling it and keep forcing myself to watch the next episode
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trying to figure out this twitter thing none of my friend are on yet soo much to see
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ya i m gon na to do it tonight it s better for everyone this way
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my life is a total shitshow i had an abusive childhood physical mental and emotional abuse complete neglect and ignoring from my father and overbearing manipulation from my mother religious abuse because of the way i wa raised i wa sexually molested in high school i went from that life experience straight into unexpected motherhood and eventually a marriage that quickly became toxic but i loved him so much that i couldn t even acknowledge the abuse that wa happening more kid later i watch them living through their own childhood hell and i tried so hard to fix everything but it just kept getting worse being used worsening mental and emotional abuse trying to carry the demand and unhappiness of someone who refused to get help for their diagnosed mental issue and i began losing myself in my own anxiety and depression after year of escalating mistreatment and abuse my husband told me he wanted a divorce the following month were a nightmare i found out he wa cheating on me and went through more abuse during the process of separation i fell completely apart emotionally and began having multiple panic attack a day i couldnt eat or sleep i had heart attack brought on from the stress my husband wa still living in our house at the time but didnt even show concern or acknowledge that i almost died i wa back at work the following monday he took all the money and spent what little i made at time i couldn t even feed my kid my daughter wa buying food at school so she and her younger brother could eat i fought tooth and nail for my marriage trying so hard because even though he treated me like shit he wa my world and i loved him he had been my rock throughout my teen year helping me get through the abuse and trauma at home only to become the same type of father himself i tried to help him to help my kid and i loved them all with my entire being trying to be the glue that held u all together but i couldn t fight the inevitable my entire life wa torn apart he divorced me leaving me with our traumatized suffering kid and our broken down house to assuage his guilt i sought help because i wa self harming and suicidal i wa diagnosed with a slew of mental condition including depression anxiety and ptsd i wa not a functioning human being for at least a year i barely remember that time of my life other than the agony and feeling like a walking corpse i mourned the death of who i had been the last few year since then have been nothing but struggle too my house had already been falling apart but thing just kept worsening electrical line not working that meant no oven full size refrigerator or dish washer no air conditioning no heat no hot water a pool that is dilapidated and look like a swamp there are so many issue with the house and i can t afford to fix them those are just a few none of the paperwork wa filed by my ex either so although it s mine according to the decree it s still listed a legally his i pay a mortgage in his name i can t afford to change thing with a lawyer i make so little money i can t keep my head above water to even keep our basic need met and even though it cost too much my mortgage is still cheaper than the cheapest bedroom apartment anywhere near me i cant sell it because it in his name anyway my ex is no longer in our life i m trying to find a job that pay a decent wage but i have no college degree i need to make at least k to be able to make it and i ve applied at literally hundred of place with nothing but scam replying positively my relevant work experience is over year ago and my current job ha literally zero room to grow or increase income i hate my job my kid are mostly grown but still live at home my daughter is in college she took out loan and scholarship my oldest ha his own mental issue that prevent him getting a job my youngest is in high school i ve filed for forbearance and now am thousand behind on the house we are of the brink of losing everything if i can t pay it all back because the loan can t be modified since it in his name and i can t refinance without an up to date loan within the next few month we are facing possible homelessness in the last couple year i met a guy who i am close to although we are long distance i fell for him hard and he encouraged me in my feeling but ended up basically leading me on i got my heart broken again i hadn t thought i could care for someone again after all i had been through but being burned again especially from this man ha left me with ash instead of a heart yet i can t turn off how badly i just want to be loved and how much i care for him he s still in my life a a friend but it s painful my heart is just so far beyond simply broken i don t think i can ever recover after all i ve been through it seems like almost every day something else go wrong thing break at my house not small thing major one today it wa my daughter s laptop that she need for school and me losing my next to last pair of contact that i can t afford to buy more of just when it seems like thing might not improve but at least be okay something else happens that knock u down even further i m working job but we are bleeding money so badly i can t keep up and i am just so tired of trying to exist i hate my life the only reason i haven t killed myself is because of my kid i love them more than anything and i feel so awful for feeling this way when i know how much they love me and how i love them i m terrified of slipping back into self harm i cant cope i m in excruciating emotional pain and the stress is overwhelming i have panic attack i can t sleep i ve had to stop buying my medication because my daughter need it more my son could use mental help but i cant afford it i just need to vent to scream that i am not okay that i can t make it i m so tired so tired and i just want it all to stop i just want the nightmare of my life to end there is no more light to be found the light at the end of the tunnel really is a freight train in my experience i am broken lonely unhappy in complete despair and i feel worse than beat down i feel like roadkill like im crushed and lifeless and not even reconizable a something that wa once alive and yet still the tire come to grind me deeper into the pavement endlessly i feel worthless unlovable hopeless oddly enough i still volunteer at church but even though i still go and serve there i don t believe any of it anymore because my life ha been so bad for so long and it just keep getting worse and worse not for day or week or even month or year literal decade of trauma a lifetime of it and still it get worse i dont know how to keep going every day it s harder and harder i ll probably delete this because i already feel so exposed but i just needed to try to get it out i just want it to stop i just want it all to stop
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symptom of panic disorder include http www nimh nih gov health publication panic disorder when fear overwhelms sudden and repeated panic attack an intense worry about when the next panic attack will happen fear of impending doom avoidance of place where panic attack have occurred before panic attack can come on suddenly at any time and often do not have an apparent cause there are many different symptom that can occur during a panic attack the symptom of a panic attack include http www nh uk mental health condition panic disorder chest pain http www healthgrades com right care symptom and condition chest pain a racing heartbeat or both sweating http www healthgrades com right care skin hair and nail hyperhidrosis excessive sweating nausea http www healthgrades com right care digestive health nausea dizziness http www healthgrades com right care symptom and condition dizziness or both feeling faint shortness of breath http www healthgrades com right care lung breathing and respiration shortness of breath with or without a sensation of choking trembling chill http www healthgrades com right care symptom and condition chill or hot flash http www healthgrades com right care symptom and condition hot flash numbness http www healthgrades com right care symptom and condition numbness dry mouth http www healthgrades com right care oral health dry mouth a feeling of dread feeling a though you are not connected to your body ringing in your ear not everyone will experience a panic attack in the same way most panic attack last – 0 minute though some can last up to an hour
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lost suck because i have to work today
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this is what my main problem boil down to i feel like i live my life inside my head always checking in on how i feel and if i m okay is my vision blurry am i dizzy is my hand numb etc etc i also think i have pppd so the unsteadiness and swaying rocking sensation affect me and freak me out the most if i wa free of this hyper awareness hyper vigilance element i really believe i d be fine but right now it really run my life ha anyone found way to reduce this or even get rid of it completely
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