Vatican paper says 'The Simpsons' are okely dokely - Boston.com Vatican paper says 'The Simpsons' are okely dokely December 22, 2009 Add a personal message:(80 character limit) Your E-mail: | Text size – + VATICAN CITY—To put it as the devout Ned Flanders would, the Vatican's newspaper thinks "The Simpsons" are an okely dokely bunch. L'Osservatore Romano on Tuesday congratulated the show on its 20th anniversary, praising its philosophical leanings as well as its stinging and often irreverent take on religion. Without Homer Simpson and the other yellow-skinned characters "many today wouldn't know how to laugh," said the article titled "Aristotle's Virtues and Homer's Doughnut." The paper credited "The Simpsons" -- the longest-running American animated program -- with opening up cartoons to an adult audience. The show is based on "realistic and intelligent writing," it said, though it added there was some reason to criticize its "excessively crude language, the violence of certain episodes or some extreme choices by the scriptwriters." Religion, from the snore-evoking sermons of the Rev.

Lovejoy to Homer's face-to-face talks with God, appears so frequently on the show that it could be possible to come up with a "Simpsonian theology," it said. Homer's religious confusion and ignorance are "a mirror of the indifference and the need that modern man feels toward faith," the paper said. It commented on several religion-themed episodes, including one in which Homer calls for divine intervention by crying: "I'm not normally a religious man, but if you're up there, save me, Superman!" "Homer finds in God his last refuge, even though he sometimes gets His name sensationally wrong," L'Osservatore said. "But these are just minor mistakes, after all, the two know each other well." © Copyright 2009 Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed. LOG IN TO COMMENT God Quotes, Famous God Quotes, God Quotations Sayings Anonymous Griffiti found on college campuses and restroom walls. I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use. Galileo Galilei Yes, I rather like this God fellow.

He's very theatrical, you know, a pestilence here, a plague there. Omnipotence. Gotta get me some of that. Stewie Griffin Baby character in animated TV series 'Family Guy'. I don't believe in God. My mother was devout and so is my wife. But I have the intellectual arrogance that makes it very hard to believe in him. I don't have the gift of faith. I remember at school I used to make up sins at confession - what we were told were sins by priests were not sins at all. Terry Wogan At any rate, I am convinced that He [God] does not play dice. Albert Einstein I could prove God statistically. George Gallop I think if you have faith about these things then you realize that judgment is made by other people If you believe in God, it's made by God as well. The only way you can make a decision like that is to try to do the right things, according to your conscience and, for the rest of it, you leave it to the judgment that history will make. Tony Blair Saying he will be judged by God and history on the war in Iraq, March 2006. God will not accept that. Mine won't.

Will yours? Rock musician Bono Telling George W Bush it is unjust to keep poor people from selling their goods while singing the virtues of the free market. God would tell me, "George, go and fight those terrorists in Afghanistan", and I did. And then God would tell me, "George, go and end the tyranny in Iraq", and I did. George W Bush Reportedly explaining his motivation for the invasion of Iraq. Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday. Woody Allen Oh! I love God. He's so deliciously evil. Stewie Griffin Baby character in animated TV series 'Family Guy'. I think that God in creating Man somewhat overestimated his ability. Oscar Wilde God made everything out of nothing, but the nothingness shows through. Paul Valery The gods too are fond of a joke. Aristotle God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh. Voltaire We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature - trees, flowers, grass - grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence...

We need silence to be able to touch souls. Mother Teresa Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us most. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and famous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in all of us. And when we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. Marianne Williamson Against stupidity, the gods themselves contend in vain. Friedrich von Schiller I'm not normally a religious man, but... if you're up there, save me, Superman! Homer Simpson As God once said, and I think rightly Margaret Thatcher If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?

Art Hoppe How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter? Woody Allen If absolute power corrupts absolutely, where does that leave God? George Deacon If there were no God, it would have been necessary to invent him. Voltaire I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the ordeal of meeting me is another matter. Winston Churchill I dislike blasphemy on purely rational grounds. If there is no God, blasphemy is stupid and unnecessary; if there is, then it's damned dangerous. Flann O'Brien And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected. Spike Milligan God is love, but get it in writing. Gypsy Rose Lee I hear Glenn Hoddle has found God. That must have been one hell of a pass. Bob Davies I don't pray because I don't want to bore God. Orson Welles As the post said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on. Woody Allen I'm Jewish. I don't work out.

If God had wanted us to bend over, He would have put diamonds on the floor. Joan Rivers No mention of God. They keep Him up their sleeves for as long as they can, vicars do. They know it puts people off. Alan Bennett When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself. Peter O'Toole It was God who made me so beautiful. If I weren't, then I'd be a teacher. Linda Evangelista In the beginning there was nothing and God said 'Let there be light', and there was still nothing but everybody could see it. Dave Thomas When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, "Why god? Why me?" and the thundering voice of God answered, "There's just something about you that pisses me off." Stephen King When I told the people of Northern Ireland that I was an atheist, a woman in the audience stood up and said, 'Yes, but is it the God of the Catholics or the God of the Protestants in whom you don't believe?' Quentin Crisp Thank God I'm an atheist.

Luis Bunuel If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name in a Swiss bank. Woody Allen God is dead! God remains dead! And we have killed him. Friedrich Nietzsche Our Father, which art in Heaven, Hallowed be thy Name. In earth as it is in Heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses, As we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation; But deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, For ever and ever. Amen. The Lord's Prayer From a distance we are instruments Marching in a common band. Playing songs of hope, playing songs of peace. They're the songs of every man. God is watching us, God is watching us God is watching us from a distance. From a Distance I'll walk with God from this day on. His helping hand I'll lean upon. This is my prayer, my humble plea, May the Lord be ever with me. There is no death, though eyes grow dim. There is no fear when I'm near to Him. I'll lean on Him forever And He'll forsake me never.

I'll Walk With God 300 reasons why we love The Simpsons | From the Observer | The Guardian The Observer 300 reasons why we love The Simpsons The 300th episode of The Simpsons is broadcast today. Find a space on the sofa and read why, in 14 years, Matt Groening's show has become the world's best TV programme. Sunday 20 April 2003 09.41 EDT First published on Sunday 20 April 2003 09.41 EDT Share on Messenger Close 1 The Schadenfreude felt on recalling George Bush Sr's quote from 1992 - 'We're going to keep trying to strengthen the American family; to make them more like the Waltons and less like the Simpsons.' Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa and Maggie are now the most popular American family of all time, especially in America. 2 Homer being voted, in 2001, Britain's favourite TV character ever - above Basil Fawlty, Father Ted and Del Boy. 3-5 The 'three little sentences' that Homer argues will get you through life.

1: 'Cover for me.' 2: 'Good idea, boss.' 3: 'It was like that when I got here.' 6 The minor characters, such as Bad Jack Crawley, such a bad man that Bob Dylan wrote a song to keep him in jail. 7 Homer: 'Operator, give me the number for 911!' 8 Their proof to TV executives that dumbing up, rather than down, has nothing to recommend it except awards integrity, ratings, laughter and profits. 9-15 Number of days (seven), according to the sign outside Springfield Nuclear Plant, since the last accident. 16-17 Number of times (twice) Homer has saved the plant from meltdown by pressing the right button at the last minute. Accidentally. 18 Grampa Abe. 19-22 How not to play blackjack: Dealer:'19.' Homer: Hit me! Dealer: '20.' Homer: 'Hit Me!' Dealer: '21.' Homer: 'Hit me!' Dealer: '22.' Homer: 'D'oh!' 23 Ideally, you should be able to watch each episode anew at five distinct stages in life.

As a toddler, marvelling at all the bright colours; as a teenager, enjoying the tilts at authority; as a student, relishing the in-jokes and movie references; as an adult, musing on the truths about life, love and death; and in your dotage, marvelling at all the bright colours. 24 Fabulously incompetent lawyer Lionel Hutz. ('This is the most blatant case of fraudulent advertising since my suit against the film The Never-Ending Story '), and in particular... 25 ...this exchange with Marge. Hutz: 'Now don't you worry, Mrs. Simpson, I - uh-oh. We've drawn Judge Snyder.' Marge: 'Is that bad?' Hutz: 'Well, he's kind of had it in for me, since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace "accidentally" with "repeatedly", and replace "dog" with "son".' 26 And his mantra. 'If there's one thing America needs, it's more lawyers.' 27-36 The 10 Harvard-educated writers.

37 Those critics who got it wrong at the start by billing the Simpsons as 'America's most dysfunctional family.' It's now clear that Homer almost always ends up doing the right thing; it is, it could be argued, one of the most moral shows on television today. According to Archbishop of Canterbury Dr Rowan Williams: 'It's one of the most subtle pieces of propaganda around in the cause of sense, humility and virtue.' 38 Patty and Selma. NB: Selma has parted hair and blue dress. Patty's the other one. 39 The sweet irony that the most profitable and arguably the greatest TV series ever came about because of the greed of copyright lawyers. Creator Matt Groening planned to recycle characters from a newspaper strip but was told this would involve mortgaging his soul to the studio. Forced to invent some instant unknowns, he drew a new family on a pad. 40 Maggie's first word ('Daddy') was voiced by Liz Taylor. 41 The deliberate mystery over which state Springfield is in. Always, just before we see a name, someone stands in front of the map. Interestingly, Portland, Oregon, where Groening grew up, has streets called Flanders and Lovejoy.

42 Bart's one trophy. Inscribed 'Everybody Gets A Trophy Day.' 43 Nathaniel West, in Day of the Locust, featured a character called 'Homer Simpson' - played by Donald Sutherland, who also guested in The Simpsons , as curator of the Springfield Historical Society. 44-57 The 14 glorious years since the first airing on 17 December, 1989. 58 The American love-love relationship with food, including: 59 Homer: 'Donut?' Lisa: 'No, thanks. Do you have any fruit?' Homer: [offers some of the donut he's eating] 'This has purple stuff inside. Purple is a fruit.' 60 ...and where it comes from: Homer: 'Lisa, honey, are you saying you're never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon?' Lisa: 'No.' Homer: 'Ham?' Lisa: 'No.' Homer: 'Pork chops?' Lisa: 'Dad! Those all come from the same animal!' Homer: [chuckles] Yeah, right Lisa. A wonderful, magical animal. 61 And what to do with condiments.

Agent Mulder: 'We want you to recreate your every move the night you saw this alien.' Homer: 'Well, the evening began at the gentleman's club, where we were discussing Wittgenstein over a game of backgammon.' Mulder: 'Mr Simpson, it's a felony to lie to the FBI.' Homer: 'We were sitting in Barney's car eating packets of mustard. Ya happy?' 62 And what it's called. Bart (as Tom Sawyer): 'Hmm. Looks like we're out of cornpone, fatback, hardtack, fatpone, corntack...' Nelson (as Huck Finn): 'Any tackback?' Bart: 'Tackback?' Nelson: 'I mean backtack.' Bart: 'Plum out.' 63 They get British humour. And throw it back at us, as in... Bart: 'You're watching PBS?' Homer: 'Hey, I'm as surprised as you, but I stumbled across the most delicious British sitcom.' Bart: [reading title] 'Do Shut Up'? Homer: 'It's about a hard-drinking yet loving family of soccer hooligans.

If they're not having a go with the birds, they're having a row with the wankers.' 64 Homer's Y-fronts. 'My favourite bits', according to novelist A.S. Byatt. 65 Napier University now uses The Simpsons to teach the defining characteristics of postmodernism. 66-75 Bart's 10 best blackboard lines: I was not touched 'there' by an angel; Fire is not the cleanser; Fish do not like coffee; Pork is not a verb; The hamster did not have 'a full life'; No one wants to hear about my sciatica; I am not my long-lost twin; The nurse is not dealing; I will not surprise the incontinent; Temptation Island is not a sleazy piece of crap. 76 Newspaper editor: 'We're looking for a new food critic, someone who doesn't immediately pooh-pooh everything he eats.' Homer: 'Nah, it usually takes a few hours.' 77 America's greatest love affair, between Marge and Homer. The most telling exchanges? 78 Marge: 'Homer, is this the way you pictured married life?' Homer: 'Pretty much.

Except we drove around in a van solving mysteries.' 79 Marge: 'How do I know I can trust you?' Homer: 'Marge, look at me: we've been separated for a day, and I'm as dirty as a Frenchman. In another few hours I'll be dead! I can't afford to lose your trust again.' 80 Homer: 'Marge... I don't really want to go through with this. But being an astronaut is how I got you to respect me.' Marge: 'Homer, when I met you, you weren't an astronaut. You didn't even know how to use a touch-tone, but I still respected you and I always will, no matter what... [touch-tone sounds come from the phone] ... Homer, you already dialled...' 81-98 The 18 Emmys. 99 Getting away with the clip shows by making fun of clip shows. 100 D'oh was in the 2001 Oxford Dictionary. 101 The Simpsons star on Hollywood's Walk of Fame.

102-108 The four best lands of Itchy and Scratchy Land theme park -Torture Land, Explosion Land, Searing Gas Pain Land, Unnecessary Surgery Land - and the three most bizarre 'friends' of the psychopathic anthropomorphs: Disgruntled Goat, Rich Uncle Skeleton and Ku Klux Clam. 109 Itchy, by the way, is the mouse. 110 In 1997, the programme broke The Flintstones' record for longest-running animated show. 111 America's second-greatest love affair - Homer and various liquids. 112 Starting, while stranded in a lifeboat, with the least likely: Homer: 'Flanders! My socks feel dirty. Give me some water to wash them.' Flanders: 'Again? Homer, we have to ration the water carefully. It's our only hope!' Homer: 'Oh, pardon me, Mr "Let's ration everything", but what do you think we're floating on? Don't you know the poem? 'Water, water, everywhere, so let's all have a drink...' 113 And moving on to the more predictable.

Homer: 'Got any of that beer that has candy floating in it? You know, Skittlebrau?' Apu: 'Such a beer does not exist, sir. I think you must have dreamed it.' Homer: 'Oh. Well, then just give me a six-pack of beer and a couple of bags of Skittles.' 114 And Red Tick beer: 'Hmm, bold, refreshing, and something I can't quite put my finger on,' says Homer. (Scene shifts to brewery, where dogs are swimming in vats of beer. Brewery worker: 'Needs more dog.') 115 The motto of the earliest Springfield settlers. 'First toil, then the grave.' 116 Friday nights in the Skinner household, where Principal Skinner's mother Agnes insists on them enjoying a quiet evening together - because Friday night is silhouette night. 117 The guest stars, including Stephen Hawking, whose appearance moved Homer to new heights of taste and empathy ('So, Lisa, did you have fun with your robot buddy?') 118 Loyal fans. 'My appearance on The Simpsons was the pinnacle of my career,' Helen Fielding told us yesterday.

'I was quite pleased with the way I turned out. Apart from the snout.' 119 And Jonathan Ross: 'After 300 episodes I can only think of a very few flat bits. That's an unbelievable achievement.' 120 'Lisa's my favourite character,' says Glenda Jackson, 'and I loved the episode where she got a new teacher that really made a difference.' 121 And the pop-star guest stars. Hard to forget Homer being introduced to a member of the Smashing Pumpkins: 'Billy Corgan, Smashing Pumpkins.' ... 'Homer Simpson, smiling politely.' 122 Springfield and religion, and some simple truths, such as country singer Rachel Jordan explaining what happened to her band . 'They switched from Christian music to regular pop. All you do is change "Jesus" to "baby". 123 Or Ned Flanders, telling a bedtime story. 'And Harry Potter and all his wizard friends... went straight to hell for practising witchcraft.' 124 The fact, incidentally, that Ned's first name is actually Nedward. 125 Jebus. Many fans' favourite segment...

Homer [to Rev Lovejoy, as he is being forced into a plane to the South Pacific]: 'Wait, I'm no missionary! I don't even believe in Jebus! Let me out!' [Homer runs to the door and pounds on it. Cut to outside, looking in the window] Homer: 'Oh, save me Jebus!' 126 Homer [to God]: 'You're everywhere. You're omnivorous.' 127 And on death: 'Don't worry. Being eaten by a crocodile is just like going to sleep. In a giant blender.' 128 Homer, again, having swiftly forgotten Jebus. 'I'm not normally a religious man, but...

if you're up there, save me, Superman!' 129-134 The five most emancipated sayings of the Malibu Stacy dolls (as collected by Smithers and Lisa) - 'I wish they taught shopping in school'; 'Let's bake some cookies for the boys'; 'Don't ask me - I'm just a girl'; Now let's forget our troubles with a big bowl of strawberry ice-cream'; 'Thinking too much gives you wrinkles' and 'My name is Malibu Stacy but you can call me (wolf-whistle).' 135 The 2002 Mori poll which showed 66 per cent of Britons were interested in the lives of the Simpsons (18 per cent said the same about the royals. 136 Homer on the American way. 'Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day, and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.' 137 The name of Australia's Prime Minister is simply 'Andy'. 138 Baby Maggie.

The cost of Maggie - $847.63 - as she is accidentally 'swiped' during the opening credits was once given as the amount required to raise a baby for one month in the US. 139 And she shot Mr Burns. 140 And she inspired this exchange. Homer: 'That baby-proofing crook wanted to sell us safety covers for the electrical outlets. But I'll just draw bunny faces on them to scare Maggie away.' Marge: 'She's not afraid of bunnies.' Homer (ominously): 'She will be.' 141 In 1999, in its century's end edition, Time magazine called it 'the best show in the history of television'. 142-144 The finest made-up names. The witch who tricks Bart and Lisa into her gingerbread house grows un-witchily touchy about her love life, insisting she does have a boyfriend. Bart/Lisa: 'Yeah, right.' Witch: 'What? I do!' Lisa: 'What's his name?' Witch: Uh... George. George... [looks around]...

George Cauldron.' Marge is also inspired, when she gives her address on the phone to the police as 'um... 123 Fake Street.' (Chief Wiggum, of course, later checks it out. There is, of course, a crime in progress). Homer's most devious masquerading comes as he tries to board a rocket for important people. ('I am the piano genius from the movie, Shine .' Guard: Uh-uh. And your name is?' Homer: 'Um... Shiney McShine?') 145 Brazil threatened to sue after the line: 'Rio is a city where all men are bisexual, fearsome monkeys roam the streets and tourists are kidnapped by taxi drivers.' 146 Marge's deepest secret. ('My hair isn't really blue.') 147 Homer on trust. 'But Marge, I swear to you, I never thought you'd find out!' 148 The New Bedlam Home for the Emotionally Interesting. 149 The producers turned down Al Gore for a guest role (after he had refused an earlier request, when they were less globally famous), and David Beckham.

150-153 Troy McClure's four most magnificent educational films, including 'Smoke Yourself Thin'; 'Get Confident, Stupid!'; 'Firecrackers: the Silent Killer' and 'Fuzzy Bunny's Guide to You-know-what.' 154-165 The steps in Barney's AA programme. Homer comes along as moral support, until he finds the donuts are on the other side of the room. ('That's a full, oh, 12 steps away! Who can be bothered with something that needs 12 whole steps?' etc). 166-172 Number of years between breeding, under the new Springfield Charter. According to the Comic Book Guy - supposedly Groening's cameo - 'Inspired by the most logical race in the galaxy, the Vulcans, breeding will be permitted once every seven years. For many of you, this will be much less breeding. For me, much, much more.' 173 Sex and Springfield, continued: Mayor Quimby's most successful chat-up-line ('How would you like to have a street named after you?' 174 And Bart's take on the whole affair.

'What a day, eh, Milhouse? The sun is out, birds are singing, bees are trying to have sex with them... as is my understanding.' 175 And Jimbo Jones's. Dolph to Nelson: 'Oh man, you kissed a girl?' Jimbo: 'That is so gay.' 176 The makers resisted Japanese calls to have the characters redrawn with four fingers - Japanese culture looks down on missing fingers as evidence of a menial job. 177-182 The world's worst television, show, 'Rock Bottom', is forced to apologise for labelling Homer a sexual harasser. The list of other apologies, scrolled unreadably fast down the screen, includes, 'Styrofoam is not made from kittens', 'The nerds on the internet are not geeks', 'Roy Rogers was not buried inside his horse' and 'Salt water does not "chase the thirsties away."' Oh, and 'If you are reading this you have no life.' 183 'Bleedin' Gums' Murphy, Lisa's sax mentor. Lisa: ' How come they call you Bleedin' Gums?' Gums: 'Well, let me put it this way.

You ever been to the dentist?' Lisa: 'Yeah.' Gums: 'Not me. I suppose I should go, but I got enough pain in my life as it is.' 184 And, less groovily, her school music teacher, Mr Largo. 'Lisa, there's no room for crazy bebop in 'My Country 'Tis of Thee'. 185 The prank calls to Moe's which were based on real-life calls in the Eighties to the Tube Bar in New Jersey, whose owner, Louis 'Red' Deutsch, famously threatened the pranksters with the foulest language ever heard on God's earth. Down the years Moe has fallen for the likes of Heywood U Cuddleme ('Big guy in the back? Heywood U Cuddleme?') and Mike Rotch ('Has anyone seen Mike Rotch lately?') 186 The Michael Jackson episode - which he voiced uncredited. 187 The knowing cartoon references, as in this exchange between Bart and Chester J Lampwick (as played by Kirk Douglas).

Chester: 'He didn't create Itchy: I did.' Bart: 'Huh?' Chester: 'He stole the character from me in 1928. When I complained, his thugs kicked me out of his office, and dropped an anvil on me. Luckily, I was carrying an umbrella at the time.' 188 The 166 couch gags, including the one when the living room had turned into a nightclub. A bouncer let all the family in. Except, of course, Homer. 189 Montgomery C. Burns, being forced to smile for a photo. ('I'm going to be sore tomorrow.') 190-192 Springfield's shops, such as the outdoor clothing store (Malaria Zone), boys' clothes store (Wee Monsieur) and joke shop (Yuckingham Palace) 193-195 Homer's code of the schoolyard.

' Don't tattle, always make fun of those different from you, never say anything unless you're sure everyone feels exactly the same way you do.' 196-199 The four food groups (of which, according to Bart's enforced blackboard lines, 'mud' is not one.) 200-202 The dogs in dog hell (because, as Homer points out, as Santa's Little Helper lies on his deathbed, there couldn't be heaven if there weren't a hell). 'Who's in there?' asks Bart. Homer: 'Oh, uh ... Hitler's dog. And that dog Nixon had, whassisname, um...' Lisa: 'Checkers.' Homer: 'Yeah! One of the Lassies is in there, too. The mean one -- the one that mauled Jimmy.' 203 More Homer and animals. 'Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals. [Thinks] Except the weasel.' 204 And more weaselling genius. Burns: 'Turn around, Simpson.' Homer: 'No!

I can't get in trouble if I can't see you.' Smithers: 'I'm afraid he's got us, sir.' 205 The decision to release no other singles after the lousy 'Bartman'. 206 And the stroke of genius that allowed voice actor Dan Castellanata, in the second series, to 'get' Homer's voice perfectly. From then on, Homer, not Bart, was the true global star. 207 Number 742, Evergreen Terrace, home of the Simpsons. 208 Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel. 209 The one where Homer almost dies. Homer: 'Ooh! My horoscope. Taurus: today you will die.' Marge: 'WHAT?' [checks own horoscope] 'Today your husband will die?' (gasp). 'Homer, I'm scared!' Homer: 'Oh, scary newspaper! Don't hurt me, horoscope! ... AARGH!' [gets a paper cut]. 210-211 Krusty's Brand Goods, and what they say about corporate America.

Krusty's Non-Toxic Kologne ('use in well-ventilated areas'); Krusty's home pregnancy kit ('may cause birth defects'). 212-219 Itchy and Scratchy film titles. Bang the Cat Slowly, Field of Screams, The Last Traction Hero, Aesophygus Now, Skinless in Seattle, Scar Trek: The Next Laceration, Why Do Fools Fall in Lava? and... Reservoir Cats. 220 Groening calls one show 'The Worst Episode Ever'. 221-229 Number of months (nine), on average, between inception and final episode. Each episode is, ideally, 21 minutes and 41 seconds long. 230-232 Three of the best cases of interplay between father and daughter. Lisa: 'I'm studying for the math fair. If I win, I'll bring home a brand new protractor.' Homer: 'Too bad we don't live on a farm.' Or Homer, to Lisa: 'You know-nothing know-it-all!' Or, if you prefer, when they're lost in the countryside: Lisa: 'Remember, Dad.

The handle of the Big Dipper points to the North Star.' Homer: 'That's nice, Lisa, but we're not in astronomy class. We're in the woods.' 233-272 Number of decimal points (40) to which Apu can recite pi. (Homer, naturally, greets the news with the phrase 'Mmmm... pie.'). 273-274 The sly references to Fox and Rupert Murdoch, for whom Groening has created the most successful US TV series ever. For example, Marge: 'Lisa, normally I would say that you should stand up for what you believe in, but you've been doing that an awful lot lately.' Bart: 'Yeah, you made us march in that gay rights parade.' Homer: 'And we can't watch Fox because they own those chemical weapons plants in Syria.' Or: Lisa: 'Wow, Dad, you're surfing like a pro!' Homer: 'Oh, yeah! I invested in something called 'News Corp.' Lisa: 'Dad, that's Fox!' Homer: [shrieks] 'Undo! Undo!' [hits key, sighs] 275 And the Devil uses Microsoft.

276-287 Number of years since Groundsman Willie said 'cheese-eating surrender-monkeys'. 288 Homer on aspiration. 'Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is: never try.' 289 And priorities. 'If a gun can protect something as important as a bar, then it's good enough to protect my family.' 290 And real priorities. 'To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems!' 291 Lisa: 'And now you can go back to just being you, instead of a one-dimensional character with a silly catchphrase.' 292 Homer: [breaks a lamp] 'D'oh!' 293 Bart: 'Ay, caramba!' 295 Maggie: [sucks her pacifier] 296 Flanders: 'Heidely-ho!' Famous Cartoon Quotes That Will Teleport You to Your Childhood Follow Us Famous Cartoon Quotes That Will Teleport You to Your Childhood Regardless of how old you are today, going through the compilation of famous quotes coming from some famous cartoon characters is bound to stir up some good old memories.

Advertisement I try to build a full personality for each of our cartoon characters - to make them personalities. ― Walt Disney This quote, coming from Walt Disney―one of the most prominent figures in the world of animation, speaks volumes about the art that animation is. When the person who created Mickey Mouse is telling you what it takes to bring mere sketches to life in a manner that they become an integral part of our lives, there's little else that you can do, but stop and listen. Right from Bugs Bunny and Popeye to SpongeBob and Homer Simpson, there are quite a few cartoon characters out there who have become a part of our lives, forever etched in our memory. In a bid to rekindle those good old memories, we decided to compile their famous quotes and share them with you. Most Famous Cartoon Quotes Cartoons and humor often go hand-in-hand in most cases, such that imagining one without the other is difficult. Is it possible to imagine a carrot-chewing Bugs Bunny without his catchphrase Eh ... What's up, doc? It's not! Similarly, it's not possible to imagine the Golden age of American animation without Mickey Mouse, Bugs Bunny, Daffy, and Popeye.

Would the American animation industry be the same without animated sitcoms like The Simpsons and Southpark? Very unlikely. While some of these cartoon characters featured on television, others featured in some of the best animated movies ever produced. Some started off as comic strips, then featured in TV series, and were eventually adapted into movies. Whether you watched these funny characters on the TV or on the big screen, it doesn't matter. What matters is the fact that they made you laugh. Simply put, you enjoyed watching them. Bugs Bunny • "Eh, what's up, doc? You can't shoot a wabbit. (in 'The Looney Tunes Show') • "If an interesting monster can't have an interesting hairdo I don't know what this world is coming to." • I know this defies the law of gravity, but, you see, I never studied law!

(in 'High Diving Hare') Popeye • "That's all I can stands, cuz I can't stands n'more!" • "I ain't no tailor, but I know what suits me." Daffy Duck • "Ridicule is the burden of genius." • "Maybe if i stare at this piece of paper long enough, people will think I can read!" Garfield • "The most active thing about me is my imagination. " Homer (The Simpsons) "I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman." • "Call this an unfair generalization if you must, but old people are no good at everything." ― Moe (The Simpsons) • "Me fail English? That's unpossible." ― Ralph (The Simpsons) • "Gary, you are gonna finish your dessert, and you are gonna like it!" ― SpongeBob (SpongeBob SquarePants) • "Stupidity isn't a virus ... but it sure is spreading like one!" ― Sandy (SpongeBob SquarePants) • "People talk loud when they want to sound smart, right?

― Squidward (SpongeBob SquarePants) • "I tawt I taw a putty tat! I did, I did taw a putty tat!" ― Tweety (Sylvester and Tweety) • "I thawt I taw a Tweety Bird!" ― Sylvester (Sylvester and Tweety) • "It's a beautiful day, but not as beautiful as me." ― Johnny Bravo • "I am Johnny Bravo, the one-man army!" ― Johnny Bravo • "Let's do what we do best Scoob, eat." ― Shaggy (Scooby Doo) • "63 of all statistics are made up ... including this one." ― Dilbert • "Desperate times call for desperate desperateness." ― Daggett (The Angry Beaver) • "Why do they always want to do it the hard way?" ― Wile E. Coyote (The Road Runner Show) • "First rule of leadership: Everything is your fault." ― Hopper (A Bug's Life) • "I'm both respecting your privacy by knocking but asserting my authority as your father by coming in anyway.

― Dad Turner (Fairly Odd Parents) • "I've got a wife, two kids and 10 finance companies to support. How am I supposed to pay my bills?" ― George Jetson (The Jetsons) • "I always thought it was real like pro wrestling but it's fixed like boxing." ― Philip J. Fry (Futurama) • "Goodbye, friends. I never thought I'd die like this. But I always really, really hoped." ― Philip J. Fry (Futurama)" • "Ah! What a fine day for science!" ― Dexter (Dexter's Laboratory) • "Hi, Dexter! Oooooo, what does this button do?" ― Dee Dee (Dexter's Laboratory) A look at the lengthy list of popular cartoon characters makes it obvious that the task of compiling the best cartoon quotes is difficult. We did give our best shot, but the chances of us missing out on some famous quotes cannot be ruled out. If you thought we missed out on a particular quote that deserved a place in this list, we would be more than pleased to hear from you. That will help us come up with a better list the next time we decide to compile one.

Abhijit Naik 50 Funniest Homer Simpson Quotes (funny simpson quotes, famous simpson quotes) 50 Funniest Homer Simpson Quotes Published on 9/13/2006 Most famous Homer Simpson Quotes on beer, love, marriage, donuts, alcohol and work. Operator! Give me the number for 911! Oh, so they have internet on computers now! Bart, with $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...love! Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand. I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman. Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers. Well, it's 1 a.m. Better go home and spend some quality time with the kids. Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene.' Marge, don't discourage the boy! Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals!

Except the weasel. Donuts. Is there anything they can't do? You know, boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like a woman. You just have to read the manual and press the right buttons. Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way. When will I learn? The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV! Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose: it's how drunk you get. I'm going to the back seat of my car, with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes! [Meeting Aliens] Please don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them! What do we need a psychiatrist for? We know our kid is nuts. Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is another nail. Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try. The only monster here is the gambling monster that has enslaved your mother!

I call him Gamblor, and it's time to snatch your mother from his neon claws! When I look at the smiles on all the children's faces, I just know they're about to jab me with something. I'm having the best day of my life, and I owe it all to not going to Church! Lisa, if the Bible has taught us nothing else, and it hasn't, it's that girls should stick to girls sports, such as hot oil wrestling and foxy boxing and such and such. I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to Hell? Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races. It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day. Lisa, Vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos. I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss!

Number 3: It was like that when I got here. Oh, people can come up with statistics to prove anything, Kent. 14% of people know that. Remember that postcard Grandpa sent us from Florida of that Alligator biting that woman's bottom? That's right, we all thought it was hilarious. But, it turns out we were wrong. That alligator was sexually harrassing that woman. Old people don't need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use. How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive? Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover. Homer no function beer well without. I've always wondered if there was a god. And now I know there is -- and it's me. Kill my boss? Do I dare live out the American dream? If something goes wrong at the plant, blame the guy who can't speak English. I'm never going to be disabled. I'm sick of being so healthy.

I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals flaming. Alcohol is a way of life, alcohol is my way of life, and I aim to keep it. All my life I've had one dream, to achieve my many goals. Dad, you've done a lot of great things, but you're a very old man, and old people are useless. But Marge, what if we chose the wrong religion? Each week we just make God madder and madder. I think Smithers picked me because of my motivational skills. Everyone says they have to work a lot harder when I'm around. Dear Lord.. The gods have been good to me. For the first time in my life, everything is absolutely perfect just the way it is. So here's the deal: You freeze everything the way it is, and I won't ask for anything more. If that is OK, please give me absolutely no sign. OK, deal. That's it! You people have stood in my way long enough. I'm going to clown college! Beer: The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems. If something's hard to do, then it's not worth doing I'm in no condition to drive...wait!

I shouldn't listen to myself, I'm drunk! 'To Start Press Any Key'. Where's the ANY key? Submit to:

Question: Which animated TV character once said... I'm not normally a religious man, but if you're up there, save me, Superman?
Answer: Homer Simpson