Writing prompt: My Hero

Student essay:
My hero is my dad and he is a soldier. You may say, he is cool but I don't think so,he just is my father now. I love my father, he is my hero because he is so nice and love me.
Although he is so strict with me, that I must get a good mark. He wants me to have a good future. When he has something good to eat,he will leave it for me,although he like enjoying it.
He has deft hands and can do many things,such as some simple handmade,or paper folding and so on,I never see a man so attentive.and he often finds out ways to make my life better and spends time with me.
I love my father and he will always be my hero!

Corrected essay:
My hero is my dad, and he is a soldier. You may say he is cool but I don't think so. He is just my father now. I love my father. He is my hero because he is so nice and loves me.
Although he is so strict with me that I must get a good mark, he wants me to have a good future. When he has something good to eat, he will leave it for me, although he likes enjoying it.
He has deft hands and can do many things, such as some simple handmade crafts or paper folding, and so on. I have never seen a man so attentive, and he often finds ways to make my life better and spends time with me.
I love my father and he will always be my hero!