Writing prompt: The Population Problem

Student essay:
Most of peopie know that China has the largest population of thw world .Everyone who lives in China thinks that the heavy traffic is nomal.But do you konw that?The large population has caused a lot of problems,not only in China,but also in many other countries.
In many places there is little food,water or the energy.People who live in these places have a hard life.Besides the traffic problem that we have mentioned,there is not much enough room for us to live in.Millions of people can't go home to go over the night everyday.One of the reasons is that it's too difficult to get a job.
Because of the large populaition,the pollution in the earth has become more and more serious.We should stop ourselves from doing something harmful to the environment,too .
Although the large population has coused these problems,I think if we unity as one ,the sight of the future will be beautiful!

Corrected essay:
Most people know that China has the largest population in the world. Everyone who lives in China thinks that the heavy traffic is normal. But do you know that the large population has caused a lot of problems, not only in China, but also in many other countries?
In many places there is little food, water or energy. People who live in these places have a hard life. Besides the traffic problem that we have mentioned, there is not enough room for us to live in. Millions of people can't go home to stay overnight every day. One of the reasons is that it's too difficult to get a job.
Because of the large population, the pollution in the earth has become more and more serious. We should stop ourselves from doing something harmful to the environment, too.
Although the large population has caused these problems, I think if we unite as one, the sight of the future will be beautiful!