Writing prompt: We Are What We Read

Student essay:
Since the app "We chat"has come into our life,it seems that we all depend more and more on it.No matter when it is, we all can see our friends stick their photos on the "Friends' circle".As a result, people are becoming the Wechataholic.
To judge the app is good or not, in my viewpoint, is really a complicated problem. First of all,it saves money of talking on phone. For we can use our mic to say what we want instead of it. Secondly, it shows a variety of peole's life and minds, we can share our thought after reading a book or enjoy a beautiful scene with your friends, which you used to talk about it face to face.
On the other hand,"Wechat" makes us be addicted with it. Since you can see people lower their head watching people's life almost everywhere. Not only is it dangerous to cross the road when you don't concentrate on the light but also it drags you far from the reality. A news has been reported that some young men and their older relatives were having a party while the young men all lowered their head using Wechat, which annoyed the old and let them end the party. You see, Wechat reduce some energy in the real life.
In my way,we should use Wechat properly. The more important thing is how we chat, but not what we chat.

Corrected essay:
Since the app "WeChat" has come into our life, it seems that we all depend more and more on it. No matter when it is, we can always see our friends stick their photos on the "WeChat Moments". As a result, people are becoming WeChataholics.
To judge whether the app is good or not, in my viewpoint, is really a complicated problem. First of all, it saves money on talking on the phone. Because we can use our mic to say what we want instead. Secondly, it shows a variety of people's lives and minds. We can share our thoughts after reading a book or enjoy a beautiful scene with our friends, which we used to talk about face to face.
On the other hand, "WeChat" makes us addicted to it. You can see people lower their heads watching others' lives almost everywhere. Not only is it dangerous to cross the road when you don't concentrate on the light, but it also drags you far from reality. A piece of news has been reported that some young men and their older relatives were having a party while the young men all lowered their heads using WeChat, which annoyed the elders and let them end the party. You see, WeChat reduces some energy in real life.
In my view, we should use WeChat properly. The more important thing is how we chat, not what we chat.