Writing prompt: The Ideal Jobs of Us

Student essay:
Now I'd like to share the ideal jobs of our group members with all of you.
With the longing of designing beautiful clothes for people,Li Hua would rather be a fashion designer.He believes that his wonderful drawing level will help him to make the dream come true.
Chang Lili enjoy being a gardener,the reanson is that she is crazy about plants and has a nice dream to make our city more beautiful.Ma Kai,who has a great imagination,wants to be a writer,because he feel like sharing excellent stories with others.For the reason of the desire to cook healthy food,Sun Jun would like to be a cook.And about myself,I dream of being a doctor,so that I can help the patients to fight against the diseases.
Eventually,I hope our dreams can come true one day!

Corrected essay:
Now I'd like to share the ideal jobs of our group members with all of you.
With the longing of designing beautiful clothes for people, Li Hua would rather be a fashion designer. He believes that his wonderful drawing level will help him to make the dream come true.
Chang Lili enjoys being a gardener. The reason is that she is crazy about plants and has a nice dream to make our city more beautiful. Ma Kai, who has a great imagination, wants to be a writer, because he feels like sharing excellent stories with others. For the reason of the desire to cook healthy food, Sun Jun would like to be a cook. And about myself, I dream of being a doctor, so that I can help the patients fight against diseases.
Eventually, I hope our dreams can come true one day!