Writing prompt: Celebrity Worship

Student essay:
Recently, it is a very common phenomenon that teenagers like a star. Somebody is crazy for celebrity worship.
In my view, I think it is not a bad thing for teenagers to like a star if they do not be crazy about it. Some teenagers liking a star because they cannot be a famous person when they are in their real life. But if somebody is so crazy for celebrity worship, he will not be a great student that everyone will think they are not a good person.
In a word, if only you can be calm with it, that like a star will not a bad thing

Corrected essay:
Recently, it is a very common phenomenon that teenagers like a star. Some people are crazy about celebrity worship.
In my view, I think it is not a bad thing for teenagers to like a star if they are not crazy about it. Some teenagers like a star because they cannot be a famous person when they are in their real life. But if somebody is so crazy about celebrity worship, they will not be a great student. Everyone will think they are not a good person.
In a word, if you can be calm about it, liking a star will not be a bad thing.