Writing prompt: The Advantages and Disadvantages of Private Cars

Student essay:
With the development of the industry and economy. More and more people own a car. The persent of people who own a car is on the rise.
Owning a car can make us work more efficiently and also make our life become more convenient. With a car there is no need to wait for the bus in the cold or under the burning sun.
However, every coin has two sides. More cars mean more pollution. As the number of cars increases, air quality becomes bad and even influences our health . It also makes some other questions like traffic jams .
In conclusion, though cars can make our life convenient , for the environment and our health,we should not encourage person to take cars. Instead,we should encourage person to take public transportation to make our environment better and better.

Corrected essay:
With the development of the industry and economy, more and more people own a car. The percentage of people who own a car is on the rise.
Owning a car can make us work more efficiently and also make our life become more convenient. With a car, there is no need to wait for the bus in the cold or under the burning sun.
However, every coin has two sides. More cars mean more pollution. As the number of cars increases, air quality becomes bad and even influences our health. It also causes some other problems like traffic jams.
In conclusion, though cars can make our life convenient, for the environment and our health, we should not encourage people to take cars. Instead, we should encourage people to take public transportation to make our environment better and better.