Writing prompt: My Room

Student essay:
Dear Mr.Brown,
I'm appreciate it for your hlep when i live in your home.With your help,i can study in the United States.
I'm writing the letter to find my lost English dictionary.When i came back my home,i find my English dictionary was left in your home.The dictionary is very important to me,it's my America teacher's sending,so its value can't describe in words.According to my memory,it may left on the
shelf in the bedroom.I hope you can post it to me,i'll pay the postage by myself.
To make the long story short,i'm very grateful to you for me during my study in the United States to provide help and i would appreciate it if you could post the English dictionary to me.
Yours,Li Hua

Corrected essay:
Dear Mr. Brown,
I appreciate your help when I lived in your home. With your help, I can study in the United States.
I'm writing this letter to find my lost English dictionary. When I came back to my home, I found my English dictionary was left in your home. The dictionary is very important to me. It's my American teacher's gift, so its value can't be described in words. According to my memory, it may have been left on the shelf in the bedroom. I hope you can post it to me. I'll pay the postage myself.
To make the long story short, I'm very grateful to you for providing help during my study in the United States and I would appreciate it if you could post the English dictionary to me.
Yours,
Li Hua