[Android Themes] Ticklefish:
Okay, this is my status_bar.xml with the invisible button:

<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<com.android.systemui.statusbar.phone.PhoneStatusBarView android:orientation="vertical" android:id="@id/status_bar" android:focusable="true" android:fitsSystemWindows="true" android:descendantFocusability="afterDescendants"
xmlns:android="http://schemas.android.com/apk/res/android"
xmlns:systemui="http://schemas.android.com/apk/res/com.android.systemui">
<FrameLayout android:layout_width="fill_parent" android:layout_height="fill_parent">
<ImageView android:id="@id/opaque_bg" android:layout_width="fill_parent" android:layout_height="fill_parent" android:src="@drawable/status_bar_opaque_background" android:scaleType="fitXY" />
<ImageView android:id="@id/transparent_bg" android:visibility="gone" android:layout_width="fill_parent" android:layout_height="fill_parent" android:src="@drawable/status_bar_transparent_background" android:scaleType="fitXY" />
<ImageView android:id="@id/light_bg" android:visibility="gone" android:layout_width="fill_parent" android:layout_height="fill_parent" android:src="@drawable/status_bar_light_background" android:scaleType="fitXY" />
<ImageView android:id="@id/lights_out_bg" android:visibility="gone" android:layout_width="fill_parent" android:layout_height="fill_parent" android:src="@drawable/status_bar_lights_out_background" android:scaleType="fitXY" />
</FrameLayout>
<ImageView android:id="@id/notification_lights_out" android:paddingBottom="2.0dip" android:visibility="gone" android:layout_width="@dimen/status_bar_icon_size" android:layout_height="fill_parent" android:src="@drawable/ic_sysbar_lights_out_dot_small" android:scaleType="center" android:paddingStart="6.0dip" />
<com.sonymobile.systemui.statusbar.operator.OperatorLabel android:textAppearance="@style/TextAppearance.StatusBar.Clock" android:ellipsize="marquee" android:gravity="start|center" android:id="@id/operator" android:visibility="gone" android:layout_width="wrap_content" android:layout_height="fill_parent" android:singleLine="true" android:paddingStart="6.0dip" android:paddingEnd="4.0dip" />
<LinearLayout android:orientation="horizontal" android:id="@id/status_bar_contents" android:layout_width="fill_parent" android:layout_height="fill_parent" android:paddingStart="6.0dip" android:paddingEnd="6.0dip">
[COLOR="Red"]	<RelativeLayout android:id="@+id/VisibleAndInvisibleStatusBarContents" android:layout_width="fill_parent" android:layout_height="fill_parent">
<Button android:id="@+id/FakeButton" android:layout_width="fill_parent" android:layout_height="fill_parent" android:background="#00000000" android:layout_alignParentStart="true" />
<LinearLayout android:id="@+id/VisibleStatusBarContents" android:layout_alignParentStart="true" android:orientation="horizontal" android:layout_width="wrap_content" android:layout_height="fill_parent">
[/COLOR]	<com.android.systemui.statusbar.StatusBarIconView android:id="@id/moreIcon" android:visibility="gone" android:layout_width="@dimen/status_bar_icon_size" android:layout_height="fill_parent" android:src="@drawable/stat_notify_more" />
<com.android.systemui.statusbar.phone.IconPartitioner android:id="@id/notification_icon_area" android:layout_width="0.0dip" android:layout_height="fill_parent" android:layout_weight="1.0">
<com.android.systemui.statusbar.phone.IconMerger android:gravity="center_vertical" android:orientation="horizontal" android:id="@id/notificationIcons" android:layout_width="wrap_content" android:layout_height="fill_parent" android:layout_alignParentStart="true" />
<LinearLayout android:orientation="horizontal" android:id="@id/system_icon_area" android:layout_width="wrap_content" android:layout_height="fill_parent">
<LinearLayout android:gravity="center_vertical" android:orientation="horizontal" android:id="@id/statusIcons" android:layout_width="wrap_content" android:layout_height="fill_parent" />
</LinearLayout>
</com.android.systemui.statusbar.phone.IconPartitioner>
<LinearLayout android:gravity="center" android:orientation="horizontal" android:id="@id/signal_battery_cluster" android:layout_width="wrap_content" android:layout_height="fill_parent" android:paddingStart="2.0dip">
<include android:id="@id/signal_cluster" android:layout_width="wrap_content" android:layout_height="wrap_content" layout="@layout/signal_cluster_view" />
<TextView android:textAppearance="@style/TextAppearance.StatusBar.Clock" android:layout_gravity="start|center" android:id="@id/battery_text" android:visibility="gone" android:layout_width="wrap_content" android:layout_height="wrap_content" android:text="@string/status_bar_settings_settings_button" android:singleLine="true" android:paddingStart="4.0dip" />
<ImageView android:id="@id/battery" android:visibility="gone" android:layout_width="wrap_content" android:layout_height="wrap_content" android:paddingStart="4.0dip" />
</LinearLayout>
<com.android.systemui.statusbar.policy.Clock android:textAppearance="@style/TextAppearance.StatusBar.Clock" android:gravity="start|center" android:id="@id/clock" android:layout_width="wrap_content" android:layout_height="fill_parent" android:singleLine="true" android:paddingStart="6.0dip" />
[COLOR="Red"]	</LinearLayout>
</RelativeLayout>
[/COLOR] </LinearLayout>
<LinearLayout android:orientation="horizontal" android:id="@id/ticker" android:animationCache="false" android:layout_width="fill_parent" android:layout_height="fill_parent" android:paddingStart="6.0dip">
<ImageSwitcher android:id="@id/tickerIcon" android:layout_width="@dimen/status_bar_icon_size" android:layout_height="@dimen/status_bar_icon_size" android:layout_marginEnd="4.0dip">
<com.android.systemui.statusbar.AnimatedImageView android:layout_width="@dimen/status_bar_icon_size" android:layout_height="@dimen/status_bar_icon_size" android:scaleType="center" />
<com.android.systemui.statusbar.AnimatedImageView android:layout_width="@dimen/status_bar_icon_size" android:layout_height="@dimen/status_bar_icon_size" android:scaleType="center" />
</ImageSwitcher>
<com.android.systemui.statusbar.phone.TickerView android:id="@id/tickerText" android:paddingTop="2.0dip" android:layout_width="0.0dip" android:layout_height="wrap_content" android:layout_weight="1.0" android:paddingEnd="10.0dip">
<TextView android:textAppearance="@style/TextAppearance.StatusBar.PhoneTicker" android:layout_width="fill_parent" android:layout_height="wrap_content" android:singleLine="true" android:textAlignment="viewStart" />
<TextView android:textAppearance="@style/TextAppearance.StatusBar.PhoneTicker" android:layout_width="fill_parent" android:layout_height="wrap_content" android:singleLine="true" android:textAlignment="viewStart" />
</com.android.systemui.statusbar.phone.TickerView>
</LinearLayout>
<ImageView android:layout_gravity="top|left|center" android:id="@id/rounded_corner_ul" android:visibility="gone" android:layout_width="wrap_content" android:layout_height="wrap_content" android:src="@drawable/rounded_corner_ul" />
<ImageView android:layout_gravity="top|right|center" android:id="@id/rounded_corner_ur" android:visibility="gone" android:layout_width="wrap_content" android:layout_height="wrap_content" android:src="@drawable/rounded_corner_ur" />
</com.android.systemui.statusbar.phone.PhoneStatusBarView>

Basically, I've put a button the same size as the statusbar into the..er..statusbar. Any press on the statusbar will be interpreted by Android as a press on the button. The button does nothing so nothing happens. It's now impossible to pull down the notification screen.

You can also do this with an invisible softkey so when you press on the statusbar, you go to the home screen or similar.

See? Told you it was simple. You just need to have a devious mind to think of it...:cowboy: