yashsingh1/xdaforums huggingface dataset:
[Off-topic] cor4twenty:
BlackBerry owner has 1 attempt left at his password before the device wipes data. I tell him what will happen and he decides to try it. He begins to yell "look wiping wiping!" He pulls out battery. He puts battery back in hoping it will not be wiping because his information was too important. He yells again "aaah wiping!!" I explain that it's going to wipe as soon as It turns on no matter what. He proceeds to ask me the best question ever

"What if I don't turn it on? Will it wipe? "

To this day I don't know the answer. I wonder when he'll turn it on to see what happened haha
[Off-topic] rasa92re:
"Does this laptop have a power button?"

There were only 3 buttons. 2 of which had a speaker image on them....... Ohhhhh gosh.
[Off-topic] hostilevader:
**** no.

Sent from a white and sexy GS2
[Off-topic] kcls:
My friend had her laptop on the ground and someone stepped on it. She asked me for opinions on a new laptop. She said "I'll probably just be using Facebook on it. Is a MacBook Pro good for that?"

Yes, sure. Buy a multi thousand dollar laptop to use Facebook on. Great idea.

Tapatalk² from my Optimus V
[Off-topic] ShadowLea:
Not a question, still stupid:

Classmate: "Android sucks, and I will never use anything made by them! It all sucks!"

Me: "Do you even know who made it?"

Clasmate: "If I want to know, I'll Google it."
[Off-topic] NotoriousNeo:
After handing someone their brand new smartphone, turned on and at the home screen:

"So, how do I make a call?"

:eek:

I usually feel like taking it out of their hands and returning it right then and there.
[Off-topic] Vict20:
"Will my laptop be lighter if I remove some data?"
[Off-topic] sniper:
First, read the forum rules.... This isn't how you get your first 10 posts.

Second, technically there is some weight to data being stored on a hdd. It's very small, but it's there.

Click here for custom mods for your E4GT
[Off-topic] clyphox:
"So does this computer come with the latest version of the internet?"

...I've actually been asked this three times

OT and Non-tech but i still can't believe this happened:

I arrived at the airport (stanstead) very early the otherday.. I was waiting for someone so went outside to have a smoke... saw a beautiful sunrise and was taking a few snaps of the light hitting the bottom of the clouds....

.... this guy walks up and asks me "is that the northern lights or whatever they call it?" (He was a brit too!?)

I said no, that it was the eastern lights and that its famous for happening everyday... (to this day I wonder if he ever got it)
[Off-topic] veeman:
Oh stupid people...

Sent from my Nexus 7
[Off-topic] loneagl:
So my gf gets a brand new s2.

Me (proudly) - it's one of the most popular and modded devices on XDA!!

Gf - hmm.Ok......u mean this phone actually has a different ports for charging and earphones?? Awesome!

: face Palm:
[Off-topic] AjunNg:
That's quite a scummy thing to do to be honest.

Beamed from Jupiter on my Galaxy Note II
[Off-topic] xaccers:
Not really, OK not being honest about what the user had done means you aren't stopping him doing the same stupid thing again, but charging €50 for an hours work is a pretty low rate.
[Off-topic] ZaJules:
Not quite tech but funny as hell. We have a photo lab in store and after handing a lady her 10 prints I notice that one of them is in the pile upside down. I point and say "oops looks like we got another upside down print, damn machine is acting up again. It seems to print a pic randomly the wrong way round from time to time" she says "oh dear. Can you fix it?" trying hard not to laugh I say " let me see what I can do!" I take the print and turn it around and hand it back to her. She just stares at me dumbfounded. Had to walk away and laugh elsewhere!
[Off-topic] clyphox:
That's going to stay in my memory bank :thumbup:
[Off-topic] 85gallon:
Not a tech question but I just read this in a thread.......

"Hi guys , its me again ... well i have a big problem.I recently owned a Kindle fire ,but i gave it to my brother who went away for a while . He came back with the divice telling me that the hard drive had crashed."
[Off-topic] Vict20:
Sorry, well it was a question I was a actually asked! Beleive it or not.

So, I'm only an amateur quantum physicist but which weighs more, a. Binary 1 or a 0 on a magnetic platter?
[Off-topic] thebeastglasser:
Flashing a new ROM on my TF201 (Transformer Prime) and I was using clockworkmod at the time. I was looking through zips, and I chose one to flash, and it starts showing line after line of text showing what it was doing. A family member walks into the room and all they see are lines of indecipherable code and yelled "Oh God! Are you trying to hack into the FBI?"

Being the resident hacker of my house, they think I can do just about anything.
[Off-topic] 85gallon:
It depends on where you are located. The charges of the bit(1) on the magnetic platter will either be attracted to the earth's atmospheric magnetic field (thus making it lighter) or it will repel away from the magnetic field thus pushing it towards the earth with more force making it heaver. If you are on the poles it has the opposite effect of being closer to the equator. The use of 0 has no charge. So if definitely depends on where you are located and how many binary 1's are written on your hard drive.
[Off-topic] FirePoncho86:
My boot animation is an android, and it says android right underneath. One day, my friend sees my boot animation and asks "hey is that a windows phone?"
[Off-topic] kaiowas82:
Well, I felt was right to charge him because he made me waste my time, time that me and him could have saved if he was only able to read what he was doing....and then he was starting to say that I frauded him selling defective hardware. :)
[Off-topic] ShadowLea:
"How do I make that backwards b on this computer?!"
[Off-topic] xaccers:
You definitely didn't do wrong in charging him, other than maybe under charging him :D

Some places I know will charge £100 an hour no matter how simple the fix is.
[Off-topic] azoller1:
Them-do you have an iPad?

Me-no I 'have an android tablet nexus 7

Them-so you must have an off brand?

Me-your an off brand........
[Off-topic] gagdude:
What amazes me is how they mistake a 10 inch tablet for a 7 inch one
[Off-topic] NewbCentral:
Coworker: How do I know if the printer is on?
[Off-topic] kylec:
People seem to assume everything is an ipad lol.

Co-worker: is that the ipad mini?

Me: no... its my galaxy note 2

Coworker: shoulda got the ipad mini instead. I heard its the thinnest ipad ever
[Off-topic] GuyInTheCorner:
Friend: oh cool is that the S2? (admiring my gf's phone)

Me: yeah it is, its pretty awesome

Friend: yeah but the guys who made the S3 thingy (yes he said thingy) totally ripped off the guys who made the S2!

Me: No, they're the same company.

Friend: No they're not.

Me: Prove it then

Friend: they have different ringtones

.....

Yes I bought the xda app. Problem?
[Off-topic] Green Ranger:
HAHAHA. This totally made me laugh, but since it's Mom, it's cute.

Ok so my turn. I don't really have any stupid ones that are like :eek:, but the stupidest I've heard was for our IT guy at work. An ex-coworker asked our IT guy, "So how come your network is down? Your network sucks." Our internet had some issues and was disconnected for a while but she believed the company's internet was solely controlled by him. She's around her mid 20s....
[Off-topic] GuyInTheCorner:
Following on from my previous post:

Friend: so what you're telling me is that this one company make all these phones? (Talking about Android)

Me: yeah, they make them all (referring to the Samsung line up)

Friend: then what's this thing called HTC? Is it like a special type of Samsung phone?

Me: no, they're a different company altogether.

Friend: so don't they like sue each other for copying designs and other stuff like that?

I later found out he's an iSheep. Which explains so much...

I bought the xda app. Problem?
[Off-topic] :
You have quite a friend there :)

Sister: The internet's not working...

Me: Maybe I should reboot the rout— (interrupted by my sister, I was about to say "router")

Sister: Do you think the internet got cancelled?!?!

Me: What?
[Off-topic] ShadowLea:
Colleague: Why doesn't the ATI program thingy from my laptop work on my pc?

Me: Because the PC has an Nvidia Videocard, and the laptop an ATI...

Colleague: So?

Me: Can you use your ABN bankcard to draw cash from your ING account?

Colleague: How the f*ck should I know, I'm not some techgeek like you.

Me: They must adore you at the bank. You can't because they're incompatible.

Colleague: Incompiwhat?

Me: Moron.

another classic day, same moronic colleague:

Colleague: Help! My computer is dead!

Me: What does it say?

Colleague: I don't speak computer, that's your job.

PC: "Keyboard not found. Please insert keyboard."

Me: Evidently a mastery of the English language is also not amongst your skills.

Colleague: Shut up and fix it.

Me: You plug this: *USB* into that *USB slot*.

Colleague: I wasn't trained to do that.

Me: You must have found the puzzle block in kindergarten an impossible task as well, then.

Colleague: *blank face*

Me: Don't call me if you need someone to show you how to operate the door.
[Off-topic] _Variable:
Dad thinks that HDMI is some form of HD. o_O
[Off-topic] scoffyburito:
Friend: Cool phone!

Me: Yeah its the S3 (I'm running Cyanogenmod)

Friend: So you payed extra for that Nexus software?

Me: Ahh...
[Off-topic] GuyInTheCorner:
Lol I got asked a similar question the other day lol.

Dads friend (who ,ironically, recently got a job at the HTC headquarters near me): Nice to see you're still using the Desire HD

Me: Yeah I really like it. Shame you guys had to cancel ICS for it.

Dads friend: *looks at phone* hang on. You're running a GNex ROM on there. Its impossible to get ICS on the Desire HD, we tried!

Me: ever heard of xda developers?

Dads Friend: no (at this point I'm resisting the urge to go ape shiz at him)

Me: *shows him the about phone page* (I'm running JellyTime, JB ROM) suck it (my exact words XD)

Dads friend: OK...

And with that I walked away like a bawse

I bought the xda app. Problem?
[Off-topic] _Variable:
Lol. Iwonder if he told his coworkers...
[Off-topic] Efe64:
Wow!

Amazing idiots in this world...

Verstuurd van mijn LT26i met Tapatalk
[Off-topic] GuyInTheCorner:
Lol owned by a 16 year old. That'd be hilarious at the office

I bought the xda app. Problem?
[Off-topic] VaderSKN:
I also want to do this! But with my device, it's impossible at this moment.
[Off-topic] GuyInTheCorner:
Jelly Bean on One X? Its possible :)

I bought the xda app. Problem?
[Off-topic] donhashem.dh:
Why do people make roms ??
[Off-topic] loneagl:
Gossip columns were filled and experts were stumped.but the salesman near my house finally figured out why LG gets to make a nexus..

Me - can I pre-book the LG nexus 4?

Salesman(wisely) - only Samsung makes nexus son.

Me - well this time it's the other way round.

Salesman shakes his head sadly - this is what an economic depression brings son....

- strummed from my Epiphone
[Off-topic] dkmali:
Can I make my own smartphone.

Sent from my Android Smartphone
[Off-topic] sohamssd:
I came home one day from college to find my neighbour(hes about 17) waiting eagerly for me.

"What happened?" I ask him.

"You must come to my home! Quick!" He says.

" Why? What's so exciting?"

"My sisters amazing! She made a computer in 2hours!"

I went to his home where I saw that his family had bought an assembled computer. His sister had just connected the parts together.

Not knowing what to say, shaking my head, I simply walked out of his house. I didn't want to ruin his excitement, but I guess i did:o:o
[Off-topic] funnypharmacist:
Two Hours? What was it,a super Computer?

Sent from my Galaxy Y - A phone with Small Screen and Big Buttons
[Off-topic] sohamssd:
Lol!
[Off-topic] R. SAINT:
A village girlfriend gave pandrive to his boyfriend n said- put facebook in it I also want to run it.. lol :D
[Off-topic] donhashem.dh:
How do I root my phone ??

DUDE!!!there is something called google
[Off-topic] _Variable:
I like these jokes, makes my day..
[Off-topic] ShadowLea:
"What does this button do?"

Button: "ON/OFF"

/facepalm
[Off-topic] AHMAD YOUSIF:
My device needs SQUARE

I realised he mean's SOFTWARE .

Other one asks me for nokia recharge card

He was mean credit recharge card (prepaid)

I replied him : sorry motorolla cards only available :p
[Off-topic] thebeastglasser:
So very recently my brother decided to tell me that he was going to get an iPhone. I obviously told him that he's a moron, and that there's nothing an iPhone can do that Android phones can't. So he decided to call the Apple hotline, and he got a woman in India. He asked "So what can the new iPhone do that competitor phones can't?"

She said: (and I quote) "Well, I have an Android phone, but um... the OS is good, and iTunes is good... and there's a fast processor in it... and yeah!"

He responded with a solemn quite thank you, while I was hollering in the background.
[Off-topic] veeman:
The woman seems to know what she's talking about. :D

Sent from my Nexus 7
[Off-topic] Jbluna:
Posted this awhile back but it still gets me

Grandmother: "how do I make a call?"

*while holding a flip phone*
[Off-topic] johnwazhere:
Mom: wheres the internet (since i deleted the IE icon off my desktop)

Me: use chrome

Mom: whats that

me: -.-
[Off-topic] veeman:
Unplugs my ethernet cable and says "LOL, I stole your internet!"
[Off-topic] _Variable:
Eww ethernet cables...

Sent from a 2.8 inch screen
[Off-topic] ShadowLea:
"Why won't my computer turn on?"

When the power plug is literally lying on top of the computer, right in front of his eyes....
[Off-topic] _Variable:
“Can you find me a good ROM for my Nexus S?“

Sent from a 2.8 inch screen
[Off-topic] funnypharmacist:
And why is that stupid???

Sent from my CM 7ed Galaxy Y - A phone with Small Screen Big Buttons and unstable CM 7
[Off-topic] _Variable:
Its a nexus.

Sent from a 2.8 inch screen
[Off-topic] funnypharmacist:
Never mind

Try looking for paranoidandroid and thats the reason!

Sent from my CM 7ed Galaxy Y - A phone with Small Screen Big Buttons and unstable CM 7
[Off-topic] namelessname:
My friend told me she still has IE6

M: Are you serious? Just use Google Chrome.

F: Will it break my computer?
[Off-topic] sohamssd:
Why? Ethernet is faster than usb
[Off-topic] ShadowLea:
In an imitation of my stupid colleagues: "No it aint!" *using USB ethernet adapter*

Send from my Asus Transformer Infinity TF700T
[Off-topic] Stereo8:
My sister that lives on the other part of the town asked me to use teamviewer to set up internet on her laptop...
[Off-topic] Nigeldg:
I was walking down the road with a friend discussing his (at the time) new Sensation, and listing some specs. When he gets to the RAM, another friend butts in the conversation and says

'My iPod has 16 Gigs of RAM, it says so on the back'
[Off-topic] FromiOSToAndroid:
This is not that stupid, but really happened at the apple store today:

I was looking just for fun at the iPhone 5 and browsing the web on my Galaxy S2, when a customer asked me what phone I was using, etc. I told him everything, and after he went through all the features on my phone(Creepy, yes!) and used Google now and was totally in shock how awesome the phone was, he showed my phone to the Apple Genius. He LITERALLY spazzed out on the genius saying that the iPhone was overpriced, etc and walked out of the store.

10 Minutes later, the same Genius guy comes to me, and asks me to leave the store. I wasn't surprised as 3 people did the same thing by looking at my phone.

After a few minutes, I was walking in the mall and the same guy got a Galaxy S2 from Bell and came to me. I was shocked. He was nice enough to tell me if I would accept $50 from him and I said no. He said it was the best phone decision he ever made, LOL.
[Off-topic] Max Xman:
"Do I have to pay when taking pictures with my phone's camera?" :banghead:
[Off-topic] TheSkinnyDrummer:
For iPhone users, I guess it never hurts to ask.

"Don't listen to Jaszek, he's Amish." - LordManhattan
[Off-topic] Ichigo:
Well another kid in my class has a kindle fire, and on the way to a soccer game, a kid asked him...

Kid:"Did you jailbreak your kindle"

Him"No"

Kid"Well, it is some pretty advanced stuff. Most kids my age(14) wouldn't be smart enough"

I didn't say anything, but I was holding myself back from screaming. Seriously?! Jailbreak an Amazon OS device(:p ;))

Kids at my school freaked out when they saw I had temple run on my kindle before it came out on Amazon.
[Off-topic] 85gallon:
A friend yesterday was showing something on his Droid X to an iPhone type. The iPhone guy looked at the phone and noticed it was different from his. He asked what phone it was. The guy said a Motorola. The iPhone guy says "hmmm. Is that a 4 or 4S?" Witnessed with my own eyes and ears! LOL
[Off-topic] VaderSKN:
I'll do the same then, if I find an apple store :p

I started with rooting when I was 11-12 :D
[Off-topic] Soryuu:
My friend has the same phone that I have. And at school we were showing each other stuff on them one day, before class.

So my friend pulls out his S and my other friend (who also had trouble using iTunes and getting songs onto that little Nano of hers) asks him "Is that an iPhone? :eek:"

-_-
[Off-topic] XxStatiX:
This Blackberry fanboy in my school was running around saying YAYY MY BLACKBERRY IS TURNING ANDROID SOONN! IT JUST GOT SHAZAM :o

Hahha,i won't force you to believe me but i really got that :cowboy:
[Off-topic] BhawaniSingh:
Few days ago when I need to change my laptop hard drive. I called my vendor's customer care.

Me: I need to change my hard drive

CC: why ?

Me: its failing and when I diagnose it it gives me the list of bad sectors present in the hard drive.

CC: which windows are you using?

Me: I am not using windows. I am using Ubuntu.

CC: what is that, never heard of it

Me : What The f**k?
[Off-topic] kylec:
A client of mine: why is my computer so slow?

Me: ill take a look...

Client: is it a virus?

Me: no your computer is crazy old.

She was given a pc with an AMD athlon 800mhz cpu, 128mb ram, and I kid you not, a 28.8k modem :s.

Apparently her friend told her it was a power pc lol
[Off-topic] saywhatt:
"how do i change my s2 to s3?"

yes, this was a real query posted in the S2's Q&A section -.- i think i reported it.. not sure
[Off-topic] sohamssd:
What did you say 800?:eek:
[Off-topic] miniceki:
A classic:

What's on your screen?

a flower vase...
[Off-topic] Slender Troll:
Someone posted this gem on Reddit. Someone asked them this earlier this morning: http://i.qkme.me/3rp4sv.jpg

Motorola Photon 4G
[Off-topic] aernstar:
Stuoidest question ever asked was....

"Why don't my computer play porn?"

It was stupid cause I was doing a home call and a virus removal a d the guy asked under his breath when his wife was not around... he tipped me for Installing flash player

Sent from my One V :: PACman v15.3 PrimoC
[Off-topic] gagdude:
I was always nagging my friend to let me root his phone but he always rejected. Now, whenever I want to use it, just to make a call or text,

"If you start rooting it, I'm gonna kill you!"

Some phones used to be able to be rooted without a computer, but most nowadays pretty much need to...
[Off-topic] kcls:
Lmao! All my friends do the same thing! "Don't break my phone! Don't jailbreak it!" They all use Android phones, they just don't know the term rooting lol

Tapatalk² from my Optimus V
[Off-topic] sebgonz:
I used to get this type of response from people all the time. Back when I was modding motos, people wouldn't let me use their phones because they thought I was gonna "hack them and put monitoring software on them." The things people think we do...
[Off-topic] FromiOSToAndroid:
Haha. I offer free computer help to anyone by phone, so someone called me today.

Hi, my computer is not working as good as before. It won't turn on.

--What kind of computer is it?

Its a white one with 2 holes in the front. They are green and pink.

--No, I mean what brand/model is it?

Its a Dell Studio, I got it 4 weeks ago.

--Have you tried reconnecting all cables together?

Yeah, everything reconnected but it won't start

--Can you please send me a picture of the backplate of the computer? I need to see the exact model number so I can help you out here.

Oh, I can't, my WiFi wasn't working since morning

--Do you know why it isn't working?

There was no power, so I couldn't turn the internet on.

I hanged up the phone and LAUGHED hard
[Off-topic] veeman:
People on Facebook... :|
[Off-topic] donhashem.dh:
My dad asks me how to put a file in a folder.....i draged it into the folder ...he said WAIT WAIT I didn't understand ....

I don't mean anything bad to my dad but his questions are strange
[Off-topic] BhawaniSingh:
This question was asked to me by my fellow in 1st year of my b-tech degree (computer science):

How to add shortcut to desktop in windows?
[Off-topic] sniper:
Wow, how could someone looking to get a csci degree not even know the basics of computers?... Smh

Click here for custom mods for your E4GT
[Off-topic] blade30p:
My old dear still panics if I say just close the window...

Me- just shut it off I'm finished

Her- minimize it?

Me- no, close it off by clicking the red X that say close when u hover over it

Her- how do I that?

Me- for ****s sake, it's the same red X u use to close every single tab or page. We then have to go thru what tabs are, again. It doesn't matter how many times I tell/show her she still doesn't get it!!!

She wonders why I lose my patience. Dont get me started on eBay & PayPal!!!

Sent from my GT-I9300 using Xparent ICS Tapatalk 2
[Off-topic] Stereo8:
My sister :

Me: :Downloading pictures from her camera:

She: Do I have to pay to the ISP for this?

Me :facepalm:
[Off-topic] NatTheCat:
Im a Pc Engineer (Could talk all day on this question)

Me "Send it via Bluetooth"

Friend says (Not Blond) "But iPhones dont have bluetooth"

Me (Confuzzled and dazed) YEH they do

A woman at work dropped her phone in the toilet. So i told her to to put it in a bowl of rice.. She said "why.. iPhones dont have batteries"

Sent From The B*S*A*D Child Prime
[Off-topic] 063_XOBX:
How's this one, especially when taken out of context.

Can u email me your dp?
[Off-topic] FromiOSToAndroid:
Today someone called as usual and asked a question:

"How can I get a higher ping? My friends have lower internet speeds and they are getting much higher pings with better scores. I have a 100mbps internet."

I just didn't know whether to laugh or cry
[Off-topic] _base2:
Not really a *question * per se... But when i see people go to Google and type in "facebook.com" and click the fist link...

A little piece of me dies every time I see this.
[Off-topic] gagdude:
It's worse when they go to the address bar and type in "google," then it automatically google searches "google," then they click on the first link which takes them to the Google homepage
[Off-topic] _base2:
0_0 I am glad I haven't seen that one yet... I might just explode.
[Off-topic] Alex530:
How do I jailbreak an android?... Every time I hear this I want to smash there empty head in.. I also die a little.
[Off-topic] 85gallon:
Good kills a kitten every time someone says that. Wait, I'm thinking of the wrong thing.
[Off-topic] SaddleTramp:
My father in law wants to get a wireless extender so he can get cell signal at his house. So then he can cancel broadband service and just use his cell phone for internet. Try explaining why that won't work.
[Off-topic] _base2:
Nope. No you're not. I've seen it happen.

This guy asked me to jailbreak his "lg 'mark way'" ... (Lg marquee) and BAM a kitten just EXPLODED.
[Off-topic] TheSkinnyDrummer:
You clearly didn't get his joke.:cowboy:
[Off-topic] _base2:
I got it... I was adding to it. Obviously not very well. oh well. Perhaps someone got my additional joke lol
[Off-topic] sohamssd:
I did
[Off-topic] Stereo8:
I've seen those...
[Off-topic] tmantanner4:
My grandfather told me off for updating his adobe flash player. He was (for some unknown reason) under the impression that updating anything on your computer costs money.

He was ready to lose it at me for "costing him money"