[Off-topic] sakai4eva:
Yes, that is my name. Professor Einhaart Irving Lolz, Faculty of Theoretical Pre-meta-physics.

Of course, you may know my works more than you might know me, more infamously the Buttered Cat Perpetual Motion Engine:

Now, if I may introduce my current, and most exciting field of study. Theoretically, a cat will always land on its feet. This fact has been proven many times by the simple act of throwing my ex-girlfriend's feline down various heights ranging from just above the coffee table to outside my bedroom apartment window. Every single time, said feline landed upon its feet. Since I have assigned said ex-girlfriend as my clerk for the experiment and her sole task was to record the number of times we threw the cat (that it would land upon its feet was a foregone conclusion, we merely needed the proof), and I quote her exact words "You've thrown the cat, like, a million times!" therefore we have proven to the point of exhaustion that a cat will land upon its feet.

The second part of this exciting experiment involves buttered toast. From our experiment, every time I told the B!@+ch to get me a sandwich, her inept, clumsy and neanderthal brain drops it. Lo and behold, the toast always lands on the buttered side down. After witnessing this remarkable phenomenon, I subsequently repeated the experiment with various other types of bread and butter and the results are remarkably similar. Toast will always land on the buttered side down. As a warning, said ex-girlfriend would have remained as girlfriend if she was not designated as lab assistant at this point and forced to clean up the results of the experiment. In hindsight, it was also a mistake to compel said assistant to procure said bread and butter in the middle of the night.

Moving on, by the sheer genius of yours truly, both these tried, tested and true theories are combined to form the most remarkable Perpetual Motion System. A buttered toast will be attached to a feline buttered side up and the combined Device would be thrown, preferably at a height of at least two feet. The two theories combined will cause a state of Quantum Gravitational Confusion (patent pending) as the quantum state of both the buttered side of the toast and the feet of the feline battle for supremacy over which should be allowed to land first. The resulting Quantum Gravitational Confusion (patent pending) will cause the Device to spin, creating a Perpetual Motion System as described by Dr Sheldon Cooper, also known as PMS.

This phenomenon is best described in the following diagram. Please ignore the look of utter scorn thrown by the feline. It is my theory that the Quantum Gravitational Confusion (patent pending) has flipped the continuum in the Device and Mr Tiddles will never forgive me for doing this. I will endeavor to test this further once I have acquired a proper full body armor and once my hands heal from the scratches.

Now, all this Physics is surely exciting, but the applications! Oh, the applications. It would simply be marketed as a device for the amusement of the masses! The joys and wonders of seeing a cat, screeching and spinning with the appropriate soundtrack playing in the background!

[youtube]zJv5qLsLYoo[/youtube]

Well, that's all the time I have today, and I hope you enjoyed the presentation!