MEMORANDUM

THE WHITE HOUSE

WASHINGTON

September 25, 1974

MEMORANDUM FOR: SECRETARY KISSINGER

FROM: PETER W. RODMAN

SUBJECT: Remarks for Al Smith Dinner

At Tab C is Cardinal Cooke's invitation to the October 16 dinner.

At Tab B are a selection of speeches by previous VIP's, including
Ike (1954), JFK (1960), LBJ (1964 and 1968), Agnew (1972), and
Vice President Ford (1973). Kennedy's is one of the most famous.

At Tab A is a draft for you.

There has usually been a humorous first part (see JFK, LBJ 1968),
but there has always been a more serious part, usually of the quality
of a prepared speech, but simple. The serious part has been brief
in most cases, but not always.

The draft at Tab A contains some jokes for you to pick from, and
a serious part. It is on the theme of the American democratic
virtues represented by Al Smith and how these may be particularly
relevant now to American foreign policy. This leads into a discussion
of some of your current themes (interdependent world, human concerns,
America's importance to the world).

Rodman 9/20/74

[N]

AL SMITH DINNER

Oct. 16, 1974

I. Humorous Part. [Themes for jokes: ethnic, New York politics, Rockefeller, national politics]

President Ford sends you his greetings and best wishes.

These are still difficult days for the President, as you can imagine.
The other day, in a conversation with him, I was unable to hear him clearly.
So I said, "Mr. President, I beg your pardon." He got very upset. [Laughter]
So I think we owe him our sympathy in this difficult transition period.

Cardinal Cooke may be interested in an incident that happened at Georgetown University in Washington. A prominent Catholic neglected to pay his fee to his exorcist. He got repossessed. [laughter]

It is a little over a year since I was sworn in as Secretary of State.
On that occasion I said that only in America could someone of my background
become Secretary of State. Then someone said no, it happens in Israel
frequently. [Laughter] Golda Meir heard about this -- this was when
Abba Eban was Foreign Minister -- and she said, "But my Foreign Minister
speaks English better, without a foreign accent." [Laughter]

My reputation preceded me, and it is not an unmixed blessing.
During the Cyprus crisis, the Greeks were very unhappy with what was
occurring. One of them said to us, "We don't know exactly what he should
have done, but since Dr. Kissinger is a man of genius it must have been
his fault." [Laughter]

- 2 -

In a similar vein, it is not true that the 40 Committee was responsible for "destabilizing" Mayor Lindsay's regime, fomenting garbage strikes and so forth. [Laughter] Not everything that goes wrong is my fault.

This is a new time of unity in America. We have just been through a period of ruthless political battles, mutual suspicion, rivalry, and vicious press campaigns. I think it is time for the Ford and Nixon White House staffs to stop behaving this way. [Laughter]

I'm glad they didn't serve Chinese food at this dinner. Fond as I am of Chinese food, you know what happens to Germans when they eat it: An hour later they're hungry for power again. [Laughter]

One of Al Smith's successors as Governor of New York was my good friend Nelson Rockefeller. Nelson Rockefeller, I know from my personal experience, was deeply conscious of the ethnic diversity of America and deeply concerned for the well-being of minorities -- although by his definition, wealthy Protestants were our most neglected minority. [Laughter] As the Congress now examines his fitness to be Vice President, and as they debate whether Venezuela can be put in a blind trust [Laughter], we who know Nelson should speak up. He was once flying over Albany in a helicopter, looked down at it, and said "Rebuild it!" I'm now afraid of what he'll do with Washington which is already a beautiful city. President Ford, in particular, got very worried when he invited Nelson and Happy to spend the night at the White House and Nelson was measuring the floor plan of the building. [Laughter]