one another — the first makes me feel I'd go insane — the second—

gloriously

glad to be alive — it sounds too like hope for what's ahead —

Hardly anyone ever dares to talk like that.

He didn't seem to give a damn what we thought about it

You would laugh — A man just came by with a tiny little baby and let me hold it a while — it was very little and soft —

I must go on — it seems to be a day when — I don't know — I feel like turning inside out —

— I feel perfectly wild

Boiling

Can't write any more.

#130

Postmarked: Waring Tex

Apr 19 1918

2nd letter of this date

It's Saturday afternoon --- I don't know what time --- We have no timepiece running --- Willard brought us out last night and he and Brack went to San Antonio this morning --- Both had to get back to town --- and we forgot to set a watch before they went --- It's great not even to know the time ---

If I could cut my hair off it seems I would be quite happy. I've been lying here wondering if I dare. I don't know --- but it seems to be the most civilized thing about me and I'd like to get rid of it ---

I wish you were here to talk to --- We had such a time yesterday I'd like to tell about it. We lunched with Mr. Harris --- Then Willard came for us and we did our shopping ---

Just as we were ready to start for the country ---
- Willard made me perfectly furious --- I don't get angry --- maybe I should say <u>crazy</u> like that very often
but when I do I almost lose my mind ---

It was terrible --- Lea had a terrible time patching it up --- I didn't want to ride in his car even --- Oh, it was awful ---
- it was also very absurd ---

However --- Lea fixed things so we at last got started between three and four. It is about 40 miles up here --- about 20 miles out of town a storm broke --- The clouds had been marvelous --- wild green and blue and dirty yellow rolling over the dark green and blue hills --- it was like Willard's and my falling out --- Really great right at that time. It rained so hard we had to stop and just sit there, all shut in, while everything that the heavens can send down tore around us --- Lea and I in the red blankets --- We had food along and ate supper. Finally it cleared but streams were so swollen that we couldn't get past --- the hardest rain in over two years, they say --- we were in a strip of road about a mile long ---

#131

Postmarked: Waring Tex

Apr 19 1918 3rd letter of this date

It's an awfully long night — misty stars once in a while but mostly just darkness and dampness — my loose hair felt too cold and damp when my face turned on it — restless — sleepless — so I had to braid it — I was rather savage as I sat up to do it.

Many singing things — a hoot owl and a cow bell — it really sounded great. You would laugh —

maybe think me crazy if I told you that it's still dark
very black dark and I'm sitting here in my coat — having already had coffee
Sam was out — his snoring helped keep me awake and he had to be back in town early
I was glad of an excuse to get up — Lying in bed gets very monotonous when you
can't sleep—

and maybe another reason why I can't sleep is because I want to
talk to you.

You know my head seems to be in whirls — I don't have my feet on the ground and don't much care about it but it seems that I ought to care.

So many things
have come up lately where theory and reality

*(now maybe I've unconsciously expressed it all right there)*

solved it for myself without knowing or intending)

don't seem to work together.

My brain works differently from the instinctive feelings I have for many things

: It's the same thing in Life that I've known in Art for a long time:

:. When

Lea was in town night before last — we lay flat on our backs — My right arm through her left one — talking — for a long time —

when we were ready to go to sleep

4-19-18

we noticed for the first time how characteristic the position was and both laughed—

We wouldn't put our arms round one another —

Just the linking together seems

to fit

:

:

still —

tonight — I've been thinking very much about us :

:

:Life has been so

different to us —

still seems to have made very much the same thing out of us — no,
that's not what I mean —

— We are alike and yet not —

the difference seems to be

—— race —— breeding — traditions —— Still —— she is one of the very very
few who understands —

= but last night — no — it's this night I'm still on —

I was wondering —

When morning comes I intend to go out and plant tomato plants and dig in the garden

:

:

: I don't know —

They asked me to talk at one of the highschools next Wednesday

Do I want to

Maybe I'll say something I ought not :

:

:

Still — I have a lot of things on my mind that

I want to say.

My throat seems to be feeling pretty good — — — I was rather discouraged a
week or so ago —

but it's better now

— In fact I'm as fat as I ever am —

— Can do as much as the average person — running around and that sort of thing
— in a day and not mind it —

— I ought to be thinking of going to work.

Am I going to hoe beans or misinform the young and unprotected.

• I don't seem

H-19-18

You wonder if I am really feeling better -
-- or just excited over people
and things.

I guess I am very much excited — but I am feeling better too
:
:
: I wish I could keep from getting excited —

: You see —
- I never knew folks quite
like many folks I've met here — Or is it the times — Talking with most anyone
seems to be an adventure
—
or is it me —

I don't know

I'm getting tired — and morning doesn't seem to come

— the bird again

Believe I can sleep now — Guess I'll go to bed —

Two days later —

When I came out to bed all the world was a dripping misty fog — it's the
way the dew forms here they say —
- I went to sleep and waked limp — almost unable
to move from the heat of the sun pouring down on me — I sleep in the east porch
— I got up and went round and tumbled on Lea's bed with her — on the west side.

Your telegram received in the mail yesterday evening —
I thought of sending
you one on the way to town — because I hadn't sent letters — but when I found
I must telephone it from the store I decided not to — The sky coming home
was marvelous :
: It's wonderful here — We had been alone since Sam's leaving early.