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MRS DAR. (sitting on a low stool beside him) What sort of day have you had, George?

DARLING Superb! There was never less than a hundred running alongside the cab, and when we were passing the Stock Exchange the whole of the members came out and cheered me. They simply would have a speech from the kennel.

MRS DAR. I am so proud, dear.

DARLING I have been put on a pictorial post card! Seven interviews to-day! And a deputation of ladies came over so affected by my receiving them in the kennel that they wept. Twelve autograph books, and six invitations to dinner from leaders of Society, all saying "Do come in the Kennel." All the half-penny papers want me to do their cricket and football news. I think you've married pretty well, Mary, pretty well - eh? eh? eh?

MRS DAR. I do hope your head won't be turned, George.

DARLING If I had been a weak man, my dear - good heavens! if I had been a weak man! Where's my pipe - where's my baccy? I never knew such a kennel! (finds things in it, lights pipe) Ah! Mary, we should never have been such celebrities if the children hadn't flown away; how strangely things turn out for the best.

MRS DAR. Oh, George, you are sorry the children have gone, aren't you?

DARLING Sorry! See my punishment - living in a kennel.

MRS DAR. You are sure it is punishment, George? You are sure you are not enjoying it, dear?

DARLING Mary, how can you?

MRS DAR. Forgive me, dear one.

DARLING There, there! And now I feel like a snooze. Won't you play me to sleep on the nursery piano?

MRS DAR. (rising) Very well. Going up.

17

(looking at kennel) In these days of hard competition, it
was rather jolly in there. (putting hand on kennel)
Old friend - old house - never again! (stretching out
arms) My children! (embraces them)

(NANA enters K.)

CHILDREN Nana - darling Nana! (embrace her)

ARLING Nana - it's yours again.

TOOTLES ((appearing at window) Wendy, we can't hold on to the
spout any longer

MRS D. (startled) Why - who - what?

WENDY They are just a few motherless boys we have brought
back with us.

MR D. (looking) My Mary, I don't want to alarm you, but
there's a whole row of them climbing up the spout.

(All come in carrying their bundles - they stand
timidly in a respectful row)

WENDY Boys, this is my mother. (The BOYS doff their caps)

MR D. The street is crowded with ladies all trying to get
in at our door.

WENDY You see the only thing these boys remember about their
mothers is that they were beautiful. So we shouted as
we were flying that if the most beautiful mothers would
come to this house they would hear something to their
advantage.

MR D. There are thousands of them. Liza is charging them
with her broom, and some of them are not so beautiful
as they were.

MRS D. But what are they to hear?

WENDY We are to pick out the true mothers from the false
and reward them with their long lost sons!

LIZA Captain Pan (Enter R. Peter majestically)

PETER I'm letting in the twelve prettiest ones, Wendy,
back everybody - no one's to say a word except
me I'm captain. Servant, show them in (X)

I don't like you to go away

W-D) Myks - mustake - end - me

42

18

(MR DARLING quietly EXIT L. about this time)

LIZA (Announcing) The Countess of Dumps.

(Enter COUNTESS, PETER and WENDY shake hands with her like host and hostess)

NIBS Oh, what a lovely one! That's my one - Is that your one, Twins?

1st TWIN Yes, she is, Peter, I choose that one

PETER Silence - over there, lady. (points to back L. Children being back R.)

LIZA Mrs Didums.

(Business repeated as this LADY enters)

Madam Plum.

(THIRD enters)

X Prefers to remain anonymous)

PETER You needn't say their names, servant.

(The remainder are ushered in in a row, twelve in all and go up L., so that WENDY and PETER have down stage and especially L. down stage to themselves)

(To WENDY) What next?

WENDY (whispers) Those who are not affected by the sight of baby clothes can't be true mothers.

PETER Oh yes. (To BOYS) Baby clothes!

(BOYS display contents of their bundles - PETER and WENDY watch effect on mothers - most are affected cry 'Oh', etc)

That green one's not affected.

TOOTLES Peter the yellow one is just yawning!

PETER You green one and you yellow one, come here. (They step forward) You are not true mothers - go away! Servant! (The two indignant are shown out)

Eliza takes them

## SCENE IV.

*(with PETER standing there. WENDY immediately comes out at door anxiously)*

**WENDY** Peter, you went away very hurriedly.

**PETER** Good-bye, Wendy.

*(calling in at door)*

**WENDY** (MRS D. comes out)

You don't feel you would like to say anything to my parents Peter about a very sweet subject?

**PETER** No.

**WENDY** About me, Peter?

**PETER** No. (she wipes her eyes but is brave) I'm going away now.

**WRNDY** (appealingly) Mother!

**PETER** Peter, if you will stay with us I shall bring you up as one of my own children.

**PETER** Would you send me to school?

**MRS D.** Yes.

**PETER** And then to an office?

**MRS D.** I suppose so.

**PETER** Soon I should be a man?

**MRS D.** Very soon.

**PETER** (passionately) I don't want to go to school and learn solemn things. Don't want to be a man. Oh Wendy's mother, every time I wake I put up my hand to feel if there's a beard.

**WENDY** Peter, I should love you in a beard.

**PETER** Keep back, lady, no one's going to catch me, and make me a man.

**MRS D.** Where are you going?

PETER I'm to live with Tinker Bell in a little house we built for Wendy. She is to put it high up among the tree-tops where the fairies sleep at nights.

WENDY How lovely! Closer windows & X'Sat back in your mother's seat

MRS D. But I thought all the fairies were dead.

WENDY There are always a lot of young ones because you see when a new baby laughs for the first time a new fairy is born, and as there are always new babies there are always new fairies. They live in birds' nests on the tops of trees and the mauve ones are boys and the white ones are girls and the blue ones are just darling little sillies who are not sure what they are.

MRS D. The sweets!

PETER I'll have such fun!

MRS D. But Peter, won't you never do anything useful?

PETER Don't want to be useful. But I'll be good to the dead babies. I shall come and sing gaily to them when the bell tolls; and then they won't be frightened. I shall dance by their little graves and they will clap their hands to me and dry "Do it again, Peter, do it again" for they know I'm funny, and it's the funny things they like.

WENDY It will be rather wearisome in the evening when you're sitting by the fire.

PETER I shall have Tink.

WENDY Tink can't go a twentieth part of the way round.

PETER Doesn't matter.

WENDY Oh Peter, you know it matters. I can go all the way round.

PETER Xg down to wake me when Wendy come on.

WENDY May I, Mummy?

MRS D. Heaven forbid, my love, that I should separate young hearts. (She goes off.)