-1-

## ACT ONE

MUSIC: THEN UNDER.....

### NARRATOR

(AN OLDER MAN...QUIET, PHILOSOPHICAL, MUCH LIKE THE NARRATOR IN "OUR TOWN")

This is the story of a boy from our town...a boy name of Joseph Taylor Junior. Nothing very remarkable about Joe... that is, nothing more remarkable than there is about any of us...But I liked Joe. I liked the way he handled himself when he came up against it...when he came up against the same sort of thing that can happen to any of us, Joe was born to Doctor and Mrs. Taylor on a lovely Spring morning in 1905...

### CHORUS (SINGS)

The Lady in bed is Marjorie Taylor,
Doctor Joseph Taylor's wife...

### SOPRANO

Except for the day when she married Joe,

### CHORUS

This is the happiest day of her life...

MUSIC: OUT...

### MARJORIE (STARTS ON LAST WORD OF SINGING)

Where've you been, Joe?

### TAYLOR

Making the rounds, dear. You were asleep when I left. How do you feel?

### MARJORIE

Fell like jumping out of bed and dancing.

-2-

TAYLOR

Well don't. How's old Skeeziks?

MARJORIE

Old Skeeziks is asleep...

GRANDMA (OFF)

Joe... (COMING ON) Joe, you in there?

TAYLOR

Here I am, mother. In with Marjorie.

GRANDMA

Ned Brinker just drove up in his buckboard. He says Jennie
has started and you better go right over there with him.

TAYLOR

Is everybody going to have their babies today.

MARJORIE

You better hurry, dear.

TAYLOR

This town needs about ten more doctors. I wish old skeeziks
would hurry and grow up so's he could help me.

MARJORIE

What makes you think he's going to be a doctor?

TAYLOR

I dunne. He...he looks like a doctor. (FADING) Well, I'll be
back soon. Mother, see that Marjorie gets some rest.

GRANDMA

I'll take the young man into his crib...Ooops, did you
hear that?

MARJORIE

What?

-4-

MARRIATOR

Like all babies, Joe was the center of an admiring and
confusing bunch of grown-ups. But like all babies he survived
the kind and well meaning attentions of his elders....

WOMAN IN CHORUS

Pretty baby. Open your eyes and say goo-goo.

MAN IN CHORUS

Nice baby. Close your eyes and go to sleep.

WOMAN IN CHORUS

Mamma'a precious.

MAN IN CHORUS

Papa's boy. Wanta play with the rattle?

WOMAN IN CHORUS

Coochie, coechie (FADING) coochie, coochie, coochie....

NARRATOR (COMING IN OVER)

And then one morning, Joe decided that he's had enough of this
crawling around on all fours...and he stood up...all by
himself.

(MUSIC: OUT ABUPTLY...)

GRANDMA

Marjorie...Marjorie....Look! He's standing up.

MARJORIE (COMING ON)

What? What's that? Joe's.....?

GRANDMA (SEMI WHISPER)

He's standing up. Look.

-5-

MARJORIE

Oh, he fell.

GRANDMA

No, Marjorie. Stay here. Let him try to get up by himself.

MARJORIE

Come on, Joey... Try again.

GRANDMA

That's grandma's good boy. Come on...

MARJORIE

He's going to fall. He's---

GRANDMA

---No. Look. He was almost falling, but he put one foot out to save himself.

MARJORIE (FULL OF THE WONDER OF IT)

And he didn't fall... He... He...

GRANDMA

He took a step!

CHORUS (BEGIN IN B.G.)

One foot, other foot

One foot, other foot...(CONTINUE UNDER)

GRANDMA

Look at him. He took another...

CHORUS (B SECTION)

(KEEP THIS UP THROUGHOUT LIKE A BASS)

One foot, other foot

One foot, other foot..

CHORUS (A SECTION)

Now you can go
Wherever you want
Wherever you want to go

-6-

## CHORUS (A SECTION)

One foot out
And the other foot out
One foot out
And the other foot out,
One foot out,
And the other foot out,
And the world belongs to you...

(MUSIC: AFTER FINISH OF SONG.....MUSIC UNDER NARRATION.)

## NARRATOR

And so Joe learned that going forward was easier than standing
still. And he went forward, step by step, until all of a
sudden, as his Grandma used to say, he was a man...That is, he
was enough of a man to be packing his bags and going away
to college. The night before he left, Joe heard his mother
and father talking on the side porch.....

(MUSIC OUT)

(SOUND: NIGHT SOUNDS....)

## TAYLOR

Don't look so mopey, Marjorie. The boy isn't going away
forever.

## MARJORIE

You're not his mother.

## TAYLOR

That's the most unnecessary statement you've made this year.

-7-

## MARJORIE

You know very well what I mean. When he comes back for the
Christmas holidays, he'll be a different boy. I won't know
him.

## TAYLOR

I'll point him out to you.

## MARJORIE

I had a feeling, all the time I was getting his things ready,
sewing his name in his shirts, helping him pack... This is the
end of me. My job is over..... You look kind of mopey
yourself.

## TAYLOR

I had another tough day. A lot of patients...and then a
couple of hours working on the hospital fund.

## MARJORIE

How are you coming on it?

## TAYLOR

It's hard raising money when people can give you only five
and ten dollar gifts. Some of 'em give fifty cents.

## MARJORIE

You'll have your hospital some day, Joe. I just know it.

## TAYLOR (SMILING)

You've got one of your feelings about it?

## MARJORIE

Yes. I have a feeling.

## TAYLOR

I hope Joe marries a girl who gets feelings about things. Do
you suppose he'll marry Jenny Brinker?

-10-

NARRATOR

Joe's first few weeks at college, away from home, were
pretty miserable, but this picture changed quite suddenly, and
Joe got his first taste of how pleasant it can be to know
and be known by the right people, when one day on the campus
he stopped by the Freshman football here, Charlie Townsend....
(MUSIC: OUT....)

CHARLIE

Your name's Joe Taylor, isn't it?

JOE (STUNNED)

Why...uh....yes.

CHARLIE

I'm Charlie Taylor. We seem to be taking the same courses.
Pre-medical?

JOE (PLEASED)

Yes. Are you?

CHARLIE

 Yep. Don't know why exactly. I got an uncle in Chicago
 who juggles pills. Says he'll take me in with him if I'm
 any good. Big Denby, ever hear of him?

-11-

JOE

No, I haven't... but that doesn't mean---

CHARLIE

---He's got a fancy practice up there, catering to a lot of
wealthy hypochondriacs....Say, could I have a look at
your notebook.

JOE

Why, sure....Here...(PAUSE) I've got a father who...juggles
pills. He might take me in with him, he says.

CHARLIE

Say, you take _some_ notes! Would you let me borrow them?

JOE

Sure.

CHARLIE

Want to come over to the house for lunch?

JOE (AWED)

House? Fraternity house?

CHARLIE

Sure. Have you been pledged yet?

JOE

Why....uh....no.

CHARLIE

I just joined one. Nice crowd. Want to come?

JOE

Why, sure!

-12-

NARRATOR

From then on his girl, Jenny Brinker, had pleasanter letters
from Joe to read to her friend Hazel.

JENNY (SINGS)

It's a darn nice campus,
With ivy on the walls,
Friendly maples
Outside the lecture halls.
I like my room-mate,
And you would like him too....
It's a darned nice campus,
But I'm lonely for you.

(MUSIC: OUT...)

HAZEL

That's beautiful, Jenny. Honest, Joe Taylor writes such
beautiful letters.

JENNY

It is nice, isn't it You'd think he was going to be a
poet and not a doctor.

HAZEL

Jenny, don't you ever worry about you and Joe having to wait
so long? You know, three years in medical school, then
interning and all.

-13-

JENNY

'Course I worry. And Popper's always telling me I'm a fool
to even think of marrying a doctor.

HAZEL

Why does he have to be a doctor?

JENNY

Because his mother wants him to be. Her father was a doctor
and her husband is a doctor, and if her darling son Joey
isn't a doctor, this whole town will get sick and die.

HAZEL

You, I don't envy you. With his mother against you, there
isn't much you can do.

JENNY (WISELY)

Oh, I wouldn't say that, Hazel. There might be a lot I can
do. Might take a little time, but I think there's a lot I
can do.....

(MUSIC: BRIDGE...THEN UNDER....)

-14-

NARRATOR

And so, in not very subtle ways, that were none the less
disturbing to Joe, Jennie began to do what she could do...
Her letters to Joe began to read something like this....

JENNIE

Remember Hazel Skinner.... She was over to see me today, and I
bet your ears burned... Hazel is going to marry a man named
Bobby Martin. He is only one year older than you, but he is
making lots of money selling automobiles.... His family wanted
him to be a lawyer, but he says the troulbe with the
professions sis that you sutdy years and you're an old man
before you make any money... I guess that's all the news.....
Fondly... Jennie...

MUSIC: UP A MOMENT... THEN UNDER...

NARRATOR

When Joe was a senior in college, Mr. Brinker took a serious
step.... the kind of step fathers used to take to keep their
daughters from marrying the wrong boy... he took her to
Europe.... and Jennie kept up her series of disturbing letters...

JENNIE

Dear Joe... I met a charming boy named Bertram Woolhave. His
father is in the coal and lumber business too.

MUSIC: UP FOR A BEAT THEN UNDER....

JENNIE

Bertram is teaching me how to swim... we're learning a new
stroke.

MUSIC: UP THEN UNDER...

JENNIE

Bertram is teaching me how to tango.

MUSIC: UP... HIGHER THAN BEFORE... THEN UNDER...

-14A-

As it would be for any man, this was too much for our Joe..

JOE (UP)

Hey, Charlie, how about your girl's sister... Emily, the
one that's going to be a nurse? She still available for
a date?

(MUSIC: UP THEN OUT.

SOUND: FOOTSTEPS WALKING SLOWLY ON SIDEWALK.... NIGHT
SOUNDS)

JOE

I'm afraid this date hasn't been much fun for you, Emily.

EMILY

Why not?

JOE

Well, here I am seeing you home, and up to this point I've
done nothing but talk about Jennie. Let's talk about you.

EMILY

We don't have to.

JOE

Maybe we don't, but I'd like to know something about you?

EMILY

Why?....We'll probably never see each other again.

JOE

Sure we will.

EMIOY

We'll see.

JOE

Now, look, I told you why I want to be a doctor... now tell
me why you want to be a nurse?

-14D-

EMILY

I suppose I'd sound a little noble if I said I like to help people.

JOE

That's obvious from tonight.

EMILY

You helped yourself. You talked it out of yourself...your being mad at Jennie.

JOE

You listened.

EMILY

I'm an expert at that.

JOE

Jennie doesn't know how much she owes to you.

EMILY

Take my advice. Don't tell her.

JOE

You think she'd be jealous

EMILY

If she's human.

JOE

Where are you going when you start nursing?

EMILY

Charlie thinks his Uncle, Doctor Denby, can use a fine upstanding one hundred percent American girl like me in his office in Chicago.

-140-

JOE

Did you ever think....you might get married first?

EMILY

I don't think there's much danger of that.

JOW

Why?

EMILY

Why? Well, because I always seem to be going out with fellows
like you on the rebound. And like a fool I always let them
talk themselves right back into love with their old girls.

JOE

You don't believe in finders keepers

EMILY

No. I can always see the losers weeping, and I know from
experience that's no fun.

JOE

Think Jennie would weep for me?

EMILY

I think....anyone would.

JOE (EMBARRASSED)

Well, I....uh....well, I....

EMILY

I didn't mean to embarrass you.

JOE (FALSE FRONT)

Oh, I'm not embarrassed.

(SOUND: FOOTSTEPS STOPS.....)

EMILY

Tell me, Joe, is this your first date, I mean, except for
Jennie?

-14D-

JOE (STARTING OUT STRONG)

What do you mean? My first date? Huhh....I've had...well,
I've had...(STOPS) How'd you guess?

EMILY

I don't know. You're so much in love with her. I figured
you must have been for a long time... This is where I live.

JOE

Oh.

EMILY

You don't have to see me to the door.

JOE

Well... Thanks for a .... well, for being so nice, and---

EMILY

---Thank you, Joe. I had a fine time.

JOE

Not much, I'm afraid. But...well, maybe we can have another
date sometime and...and I won't talk about Jennie all the
time.

EMILY (SMILING)

Just half the time?....Good-night.

JOE

Good night.

(SOUND: FOOTSTEPS AS HE WALKS OFF......)

See you around soon,

EMILY (ON)

Sure... Sure...

(MUSIC: SNEAK IN INTRO FOR SONG...BEFORE THIS LINE...)

(CONTINUED)

-14E-

EMILY (CONT'D)

No keepsakes have we
For days that are gone,
No fond recollections to look back upon,
No song that we love,
No scene to recall
We have no traditions at all....

We have nothing to remember so far, so far,
So far, we haven't walked by night
And shared the light of a star,
So far, your heart has never fluttered so near, so near,
That my own heart alone could hear it.
We haven't gone beyond the very beginning,
We've just begin to know how lucky we are,
So we have nothing to remember so far, so far,
But now I'm face to face with you,
And now at last we've met,
And now we can look forward to
The things we'll never forget.

(MUSIC: AT END OF SONG.....SEGUE UNDER...)

NARRATOR

Toward the end of summer, Jennie wrote that it was all over
between her and Bertram Woolhaven and she was coming home..
And then on a lovely evening in August, she was home....

-15

MUSIC: OUT

Hello, Joe

Hello, Jennie

You look different, Joe.

You look different too.

Older?

Prettier.

Want to sit down, in the hammock?

Yes I would.. Nice night.

It's just the kind of night I hoped it would be.

Did you? Did you think much about tonight...too?

Did you?

MUSIC: BEGINS IN B.G. VERY SIMPLY..

JENNIE

JOE

JENNIE

JOE

JENNIE

JOE

JENNIE

JOE

JENNIE

JOE

JENNIE

-17-

JOE (CONT'D)

But tonight you're no star;
Nor a song that I sing;
In my arms, where you are,
You are sweeter than spring;
In my arms where you are,
Clinging closely to me,
You are loverlier, by far
Than I dreamed you could be,
You are lovelier, my darling
Than I dreamed you could be...

JOE (AS CHORUS FINISHES HUMMING...)

I love you, Jennie.

JENNIE

I love you, Joe...

MUSIC: OUT....

JENNIE

Going to medica school next year?

JOE

Yes, I've been working a lot with Dad this summer. It's
exciting watching sick people get better. Then you know it's
about the best thing a man can be...is a doctor.

JENNIE

Yes, I suppose so, but...well...

JOE

Oh, I know what you mean. Well, I'm not going to wait till
I get out of medical school. We're going to get married sooner
that that....I guess I better speak to your father. Do you
think he likes me?

-18-

JENNIE

He likes you a lot... But he might speak to you about going in with him in the coal and lumber business.

JOE

You mean instead of being a doctor?

JENNIE

Well... he'll tell you how rich you could be in a few years and...

JOE

I know, but---

JENNIE (REALIZING IT IS TOO SOON TO PULL THIS)

---But whatever happens, Joe, It's got to be you who decides. I'd never influence you one way or the other. You make up your own mind, darling.

MUSIC: THEN UNDER...

NARRATOR

And Joe did make up his mind... He went to medical school... And Jennie waited for him, and made new plans for him. Plans which she subtly mentioned to Mrs. Taylor every now and again...

MUSIC: OUT...

MARJORIE

What did you mean by that, Jennie?

JENNIE

By what, Mrs. Taylor?

MARJORIE

About Joe being too ambitious to be a small town doctor. Has Joe said anything about that?

JENNIE

My father thinks, well, he thinks its awful...
for Joe and me to have to struggle along for years like...like you and Doctor Taylor.

-19-

MARJORIE

And do you agree with him, Jennie?

JENNIE

Well, it seems a shame with a wonderful business like Pop's.

He has no son, and he says he could teach it to Joe in a couple
of years. Pop think Joe is smart.

MARJORIE

So do I, Jennie. Joe's good at anything he likes to do. Joe's
good at medicine, Jennie. His father says he's a born doctor.

JENNIE

I don't think anybody's a born anything, do you, Mrs. Taylor?

MARJORIE

Perhaps not. But when you've watched a boy grow up, you know a
lot about what...what's inside him. I don't think Joe would
be happy selling coal and lumber.

JENNIE

Well, I don't think I'd be happy as the wife of a starving
doctor. I've got things inside of me too.

MARJORIE

I know you have, Jennie, but...Jennie, what would you do if
Joe refused to give up medicine?

JENNIE

I'd see to it that he became a real doctor.

MARJORIE

Well... Good!

JENNIE

A very rich one.

MARJORIE

Oh.

-20-

JENNIE

We'd go to some big city or someplace. I'd help him get to be
the richest doctor in town.

MARJORIE

Jennie, aren't you confusing success with wealth? Some
successful men are wealthy. Some are not. I think my husband
is a very successful man. He's doing work he likes for people
he likes....and he's got the kind of home he needs.

JENNIE

I've got a slightly different definition of success, Mrs.
Taylor.

MARJORIE

Yes, I'm afraid so.

JENNIE

You think I'm the wrong kind of wife for Joe, don't you?
(PAUSE) Have you told him that?

MARJORIE

I haven't said a word to Joe about this. This is between you
and me.

JENNIE

Like all mothers, you just want him to do what you want him to
do.

MARJORIE

That's not true. I want him to do what he'll be happy at. I
don't want him to be forced to live by someone else's false
ideas of success.

JENNIE

You don't like me, and you never did...and I always knew it.
But I feel better now that war's declared.

-21-

## MARJORIE

So do I, Jennie...So do I.

MUSIC: BRIDGE..THEN UNDER...

## NARRATOR

But there was no war...because two days later...two days later,
Joe's mother suffered a heart attack and died... (PAUSE)
And two years later, when Joe finished medical school, we were
all invited to the wedding...

SOUND: CHURCH BELLS...GENTLY TOLLING IN B.G...

## CHORUS (SINGS)

To have and to hold
from this day forward
For better, for worse,
For richer, for poorer,
In sickness and in health...
To love and to cherish,
Till death do us part...
Till death do us part....

## JOE (SPEAKS)

With this ring...I thee wed...

## CHORUS

Two more lovers
Were married today,
Wish them well!
Wish them well!
Wish them well!

Brave and happy,
They start on their way,
Wish them well!
Wish them well!
Wish them well!

-22-

CHORUS (CONT'D)

They have fatith in the future
And joey in their hearts,
If you look in their eyes
You can tell...
How brave and happy
And hopeful are they.
Wish them well, wish them well,
Wish them well, wish them well, wish them well....

SOUND: AS THE MUSIC SWELLS DURING THE LAST PART OF THE CHORUS...
BRING IN CHURCH BELLS RINGING OUT LOUDLY....
MUSIC AND SOUND BLEND FOR FINISH OF THE ACT....

END OF ACT ONE

-23-

ACT TWO

MUSIC: PICK UP THE "WISH THEM WELL" MUSIC FROM END OF ACT
ONE...WITH CHORUS...IN B.G....AND FADING OUT...AS
NARRATION STARTS.

NARRATOR

Yes, we were all there in the church to wish Joe and Jennie
well...that was in 1928.. I don't know if departed souls know
what's going on in this world, but if they do, I'm sure Joe's
mother, Marjorie, must have felt sort of sick at heart when
Jennie finally got her Joe...If she wasn't upset, she should
have been....Well, the second year of Joe's practice, was the
first year of the depression..I lost my hardware store, Jennie's
father lost his coal and lumber business...But Joe's practice
went along pretty well...and this, of course, pleased Jennie...

MUSIC: OUT...

HAZEL (OFF)

Hey, Jennie, what are you doing?

JENNIE

Hi, Hazel, I'm hanging out my wash. What's the matter?

HAZEL

I wanted you to look at the chinchilla coat.

JENNIE

You got a chinchilla coat in these times. Come on over and show
it to me.

HAZEL (COMING ON)

No...In the magazine. A picture of one...Look...In Vogue.

JENNIE

Let's see...Mmm. To think some girls actually get things like
this.

-24-

HAZEL

And they're the kind who don't do any housework.

JENNY

Look On the opposite page...an Article.

HAZEL

Let's see..."Money Isn't Everything."...

JENNY

I don't want everything. I'll just take money.

MUSIC: INTRODUCTION FOR MONEY ISN'T EVERYTHING...START BACK AT
APPROPRIATE PLACE...)

HAZEL

Listen to what it says....

(SINGS)

Money isn't everything,
What can money buy?

CHORUS OF GIRLS

An automobile so you won't get wet,
Champagne so you won't get dry.

JENNIE

Money isn't everything
What have rich folks got?

CHORUS OF GIRLS

A Florida home so you won't get cold,
A yacht so you won't get hot.

HAZEL

An orchid or two
So you won't fell blue,
If you have to go out at night...

-25-

JENNIE

And maybe a jar
Of Caviar
So your appetite won't be light.

HAZEL

Oil tycoon and cattle king,
Radio troubadour...
Belittle the fun that their fortunes bring,
And tell you that they are sure...
Money isn't everything.

CHORUS OF GIRLS

Money isn't everything,
Money isn't everything.

JENNIE

Unless you're very poor.

HAZEL

Can money make you honest, can it teach you right from wrong?
Can money keep you healthy? Can it make your muscles strong?

JENNIE

Can money make your eyes red, the way they get from sewing?
Can money make your back get sore, the way it gets from mowisng?

HAZEL

Can money make your hands get rough, as washing dishes does?

JENNIE

Can money make you smell the way that cooking fishes does?

HAZEL

It buys you gems and fancy clothes and juicy steaks to carve,
But it cannot build your character

-26-

JENNY

Or teach yoo how to starve.

HAZEL

Money isn't everything.
If you're rich you pay...

CHORUS OF GIRLS

Elizabeth Arden to do your face
The night you attend the play.

JENNY AND HAZEL

Felling like the bloom of spring.
Down the aisle you float.

A Tiffany ring and a Cartier string,
of pearls to adorn your throat.

Your carnegie dress
Will be more or less
Of a handkerchief round your hip,
Sewed on to you so
That your slip won't show,

JENNY

And whatever you show won't slip.

CHORUS OF GIRLS

To your creamy shoulders cling
Ermines white as snow.

Then on to cafes where they sway and swing,
You go with your wealthy beau.

There you'll hear a crooner sing:
Money isn't everything...

-27-

## CHORUS OF GIRLS (CONT'D)

Money isn't everything.

As long...as...you...have...dough!

(MUSIC: FINISH SONG....THEN UNDER...)

### NARRATOR

In the Spring of that year, Joe went up to his Class Reunion...
and there he met again his old room-mate, Charlie Townsend,
and Charlie's uncle, Doctor Bigby Denby, under whom he has
served his internship in Chicago.....

(SOUND: CHATTER OF REUNION VOICES IN B.G...)

### CHARLIE

Joe, guess who Uncle Denby here's got for a nurse?

### JOE

I don't know who?

### CHARLIE

Emkly. Remember Emily in College. The night you were
mad at Jennie and--

### DENBY

---Now, Charlie, you'll have the rest of the week-end to
reminisce with Joe here. I've got something important I
want to talk over with him... First, can I order you
another drink, Joe?

-27A-

JOE

Thank you I---

CHARLIE (SLIGHTLY DRUNK)

Watch out, Joe, he wants to oil you up before he lures you
to the big city to be a hand-holding doctor for all our
uppercrust hypochondriacs. Waiter, another drink.

DENBY

I think you've had enough, Charlie... What Charlie never
seems to get through his head is that medicine is not just
emergency operations on starving workmen. The rich get sick
too, and if you're going to be a doctor to the rich, you
have to play their game.

-28-

game.

CHARLIE

And what a game.

DENBY

You can't be a detached scientist in a shell. You've got to
live among the people you serve. You don't seem to mind
spending their money, Charlie.

CHARLIE

Of course I don't. But I don't try to fool myself into thinking
I'm doing great things in medicine, the way you do. I admit
I'm a diletante among diletantes...I can inject Vitamin B into
the flanks of tired night-clubbers as well as the next guy, and
I can recommend long rests in Palm Springs...and I've got the
good sense to know that when something's really wrong with my
patient, I can send him to some doctor who isn't so busy playing
the game, he's forgotten all the medicine he ever knew...

DENBY

I wish you wouldn't have any more to drink, Charlie. It's not
becoming in a physician...Now, Joe, if you'll try to forget
everything Charlie's said...I'd like you to consider coming in
with me in my practice and in the hospital with me in Chicago...

MUSIC: BRIDGE...THEN UNDER...

NARRATOR

When Joe came home and told Jennie what his answer had been, she
wouldn't believe him.

MUSIC: OUT...

JENNIE

Joe, you're trying to be funny.

-29-

JOE

JOE

...Honey, it's not exactly the kind of practice I want...it's hard to explain to you...and...and I don't want to walk out on my father here. I'm just beginning to be some help to him.

JENNY (STARTS TO SNIFFLE)

JOE

There's nothing to cry about...Come on, Jenny. Don't cry...
What's the matter?

JENNY

I was only thinking, how wonderful it would be to have a
beautiful house in Chicago, and servants and lovely dresses to
wear so I could look pretty for you when you came home at night.

JOE

I know how tough it's been for you, Jenny. I wish I could
explain to you just how I feel about this Chicago thing...It's
...I don't know.

JENNY

Don't worry about it, darling. You're a better judge of what
you can do than I am.

JOE

What do you mean?

JENNY

Well, I supposed you're worried about whether you could handle
a big city practice, with important patients like Brook...

-30-

Lansdale...

JOE

I could handle it all right. Why do you suppose they want me?

JENNY

Well, I... Goodness, I think you're the best doctor in the world.
It only looked to me as if you might be afraid to handle...

JOE

Afraid? Of course not. I...I just feel...if I did want to go,
I don't know how I could ever break it to Dad.

JENNIE

You know when you told me this, I thought of a million things
at once. First thing I thought of was we'd soon be so rich you
could give your father that old twenty thousand dollars he
needs to complete the hospital.

JOE (THINKING ABOUT IT);

That's an idea.

JENNY (COZYING UP TO HIM)

Know what else I was thinking? I was thinking now at least we
could afford something...something I've wanted ever since we
were married. He'd be...or she'd be...the most important thing
in my life...Next to you.

MUSIC: BRIDGE...THEN UNDER...

NARRATOR

Joe went to Chicago...He went because Jenny wanted him to go,
though he told himself it was for other reasons. He told
himself that once he got to Chicago, he could chuck Dr. Denby
and the silly sycophants he treated, and set up for himself.
But he couldn't...

-31-

MUSIC AND CHORUS...START "YATATA YATATA" IN BACKGROUND AND
BRING CLOSER AS WE GO ALONG...)

And within two years he found himself less and less a doctor
and more and more a politician, a promoter, a rumba dancer, a
cocktail party raconteur, a wet nurse for spoiled adults, who
gathered every afternoon at five to exchange the days gossip...

MUSIC AND CHORUS: BRING YATATA YATATA INTO CLEAR FOR A FEW
MOMENTS THEN FADE UNDER....

NARRATOR

Then one evening, Emily came to his apartment during one of
these parties.

(MUSIC: OUT)

EMILY

I'm sorry to take you away from your party, Doctor, But-

JOE

--It's all right, Emily. I brought along a drink for you.
Here.

EMILY

Thanks. I don't feel like one just now.

JOE

Well, all right....What have you got there?

EMILY

X-Ray films. Gilbert Martin's.

JOE

But I've already looked at them, Emily. I told you to phone
him and tell him there was nothing to worry about.

EMILY

Perhaps you'd like to take another look at them, Doctor.

-32-

JOE

What do you mean? Think the agening doctor's eyes are going
back on him. Let's see.

EMILY

You were in such a hurry to leave this afternoon. Don't blame
you, of course, when you're giving a party for Brook Lansdale
and the hospital trustees, but......see what I mean about the
X-ray?

JENNY (OFF)

Joe...Joe? (COMING ON) Oh, Joe, here you are. Hello, Emily?

EMILY

Hello, Mrs. Taylor.

JENNY

Joe, you must come up. Mrs. Lansdale is about to leave and she
wants to talk to you. Mrs. Brook Lansdale.

JOE

I know. Twenty million dollars and she can't sleep.

JENNY

She wants to talk to you, Joe, about donating three hundred
thousand dollars towards our new private pavillion. I guess
that's about as important to you as anything else can be right
now, isn't it, Joe?

JOE

I'll go right up to her.

EMILY

Doctor, shall I phone Mr. Martin and tell him his stomajch is
just fine and dandy?

-33-

JOE

Er...No. Wait until the morning. I'd like to look at it in
the office. I don't trust this light.

JENNY

Joe, Please. Mrs. Lansdale!

JOE (GOING OFF)

All right, all right. I'm going.

JENNY

The trouble with Joe is he's inclined to give too much time to
the little things and not enough to the things that count.

EMILY

Oh, I think he's learning, Mrs. Taylor. He's learning fast.

JENNY (FADING)

Well, if you'll excuse me, Emily....I'm sure you can find your
way out..Good night...

EMILY

Good night...

MUSIC: START INTRO FOR "GENTLEMEN IS A DOPE..."

EMILY

The boss gets on my nerves
I've got a good mind to quit.
I've taken all I can.
It's time to get up and git,
And move to another job,
Or maybe another town.
The gentleman burns me up.
The gentleman gets me down.

-35-

EMILY (CONT)

The gentleman doesn't know
How happy he could be..
Look at me crying my eyes out,
As if he belonged to me...
He'll never belong to me.

MUSIC: UP FOR FINISH....THEN INTO SHORT BRIDGE...

JOE

You sent for me, Doctor Denby?

DENBY

Oh, yes, Doctor Taylor... Come in and sit down. Two things...
First about yourself. I am very pleased with you, Joseph. Not
only because of your work here at the office, but at the
hospital... You... well, you have won the regard of Brook
Lansdale, and the approval of our... our biggest trustee is
even more important than my approval... hmm?

JOE

Well, Doctor Denby, I-

DENBY

- Now, I come to my second topic. Charlie, my nephew, in this
recent...uh...rebellion at the hospital...the nurses demanding
eight hour duty...he actually took their side. You don't
think he's been drinking too much, do you?

JOE

Well, no. As a matter of fact, Doctor Denby-
(SOUND: TELEPHONE RINGS...)

DENBY

Excuse me... Hello....Mr. Tubb? Chairman of what committee?

...36--

DENBY (CONT)

(BORED) Yes, I know it's the worst slum in the city. Quite
right, Mr. Tubb. A cesspool...a disease hatchery. I agree.
No, I will not go to the Mayor...No, Mr. Tubb, our policy at
the hospital is to keep out of politics. (SUDDENLY INFURIATED)
And I say to you---What?...You...You.

(SOUND: RECEIVER BANGED DOWN...)

Do you know what that man called me? An old vitamin pot!...
This fellow, do you know what else he called me?...

(SOUND: DOOR OPENS...)

DENBY

Charlie, come in here...There was a fellow, just on the phone
and do you know what he called me?

CHARLIE

Yes. A mechanical bottom jabber.

DENBY

Was that you on the phone just now?

CHARLIE

Just my little joke for the day, Uncle.

DENBY

Joke. Is that all you have to do? Because if it is, we can
get along without you. We want doctors here, not jokers...

EMILY (ON SQUAWK BOX):

Dr. Denby, Mr. Lansdale is on his way in...

DENBY

Lansdale...All right, now, Charlie...I don't want---

LANSDALE (COMING ON)

It's all right. I'll go right in...He doesn't mind...

-37-

(SOUND: DOOR OPENS...)

DENBY

Why, Brook! This is an unexpected pleasure. We were just---

LANSDALE (GRUFF AND DECISIVE)

I'm catching a train, Digby...Hello, Charlie, Joe.

JOE

Mr. Lansdale.

LANSDALE

Sorry to break in on you, but this couldn't wait. It's about
the trouble we've been having with the nurses.

DENBY

But I squelched that, old boy. They're continuing on the old
basis of twelve hour duty.

LANSDALE (IMPATIENTLY)

I know that!

DENBY (FLUSTERED)

Oh, I'm sorry. But what..I mean--

LANSDALE

---I've got the name of the agitator who started the whole thing. I want to get rid of this woman.

DENBY

Well, naturally. We'll have to make an example of her.

LANSDALE

Name of the woman is Carrie Middleton.

DENBY (STUNNED)

Carrie?

JOE

Old Carrie Middleton on the Fifth Floor, Mr. Lansdale?

-38-

## LANSDALE

That's the one. Been with us for thirty years and then turns traitor. Take her name off the registry I want her out of the hospital when I get back here. That'll be the day after tomorrow...Well, good day, gentlemen.

(SOUND: DOOR CLOSES SHARPLY)

## CHARLIE

Well, uncle?

(A PAUSE)

## DENBY (ON PHONE)

Hello, Miss West...will you come in here a moment?

## CHARLIE

I seem to remember an old photograph at home. You and Carrie Middleton at the Chicago World's Fair, when she was a student nurse...

(SOUND: DOOR OPENS...)

## EMILY

You wanted me, Doctor Denby?

## DENBY

Call up the Nurse's Registry and have them strike off the name of Carrie Middleton.

## EMILY

But, Doctor---

## JOE

Don't you think this is pretty hard on her, Doctor Denby? It isn't any crime to---

## DENBY

My boy, there's such a thing as discipline...loyalty. We must do many things we don't want to do. Duty...We must be good

-39-

DENBY (CONT)

soldiers! (FADING) I have a luncheon appointment, Miss West,
I'll be back about four...

(SOUND: DOOR CLOSES...)

CHARLIE

Look you two, you don't need to give me the fishy stare. He's
only my uncle by marriage.

JOE

I wonder if Carrie would go down and help my father out. He's
up to his neck in a flu epidemic.

CHARLIE

Good idea. But don't tell Lansdale. Mustn't be friendly with
anybody he doesn't like. My uncle <u>never</u> is. That's why he's
physician-in-chief at the hospital.

JOE

I'm sick of Lansdale. He can go-

CHARLIE (IMITATING HIS UNCLE)

Tut, tut, my boy. There are many things that one would like
to do that one does not. Duty.

MUSIC: A CHORD ON PIANO

EMILY

You must be good soldiers.

MUSIC: ANOTHER CHORD

CHARLIE

This is a big-time medical practice, Joe.

JOE (BITTERLY)

Sure...Through the portals of this office pass the biggest
screwballs in town...and I'm sick of it.

ACT THREE

-44-

MUSIC: OPENING MUSIC...THEN OUT...

(SOUND: DOOR OPENS...

EMILY

Morning, Doctor Taylor.

Joe

'Morning, Emily. Anybody waiting?

EMILY

The Zoo is packed...You look kind of low today, boss.

JOE

I am. I just had a letter from a boy who used to be a patient of mine. He was going to study for the priesthood at one time. It was a sad, hopeless little letter.

EMILY

The T.B. case back home. You told me about him.

JOE

I guess I feel guilty about him. I can't get rid of the feeling that if I'd spent the last five years on one boy like Vincent I'd have done the world more good than I could ever do in a lifetime her3.

EMILY

Getting sour on rich city people?

JOE

No, why should I? There's nothing wrong with people just because they have money or live in the city...Certainly nothing wrong with being a city doctor...But this crowd that we get... Who's out there now?

EMILY

Well, Mrs. Lansdale's just arrived and --

-45-

(SOUND: DOOR OPENS)

MRS. LANSDALE (COMING ON)

I knew you must be in by now.

JOE

Mrs. Lansdale, I --

MRS. LANSDALE

Nurse, why didn't you tell me he was in here?

EMILY

He asked me to --

MRS. LANSDALE

-What I've got to say won't take long. The other night I was just dozing off about two in the morning when the phone rang. It was my husband to say that he'd be home late. It then occurred to me that most nights I lie away wondering when and if he is coming home.

JOE

He works too hard...He...

MRS. LANSDALE

So I put a detective on him...It seems that my husband has got himself a girl...Here's a carbon copy of the report.

JOE

Mrs. Lansdale, this is a private matter that --

MRS. LANSDALE

--Oh, I don't care if the nurse hears. The papers'll have it tomorrow when I fly to Nevada.

JOE

Well, is there anything you want me to do? Want anything to quiet your nerves...

-46-

MRS. LANSDALE

No. I want to enjoy this ... You might read that detective's
report when you get time. It'll give you quite a kick.
(FADING) Good afternoon,

(SOUND: DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES...OFF)

JOE

Emily, isn't there anyone in that waiting room with a broken
arm or a gallstone? Is there anybody out there worth a
doctor's time and knowledge? Can't you scare us up a ruptured
appendix or a pair of infected tonsils? What kind of practice
is this anyhow...I've got to spend my time reading reports of
private detectives who spy on wives and husbands...(HIS VOICE
DROPS OFF DURING THE LAST OF THIS AS HE STARTS TO READ REPORT.
BECOMES INTERESTED IN IT...)

EMILY

Dr. Denby want me to remind you that you all have to leave the
office in a few minutes and go over to the dedication of the
new private pavilion...(PAUSE) Did you hear me, Doctor?

JOE (AFTER A PAUSE)

What?..Oh, yes...I was just reading this...thing...

EMILY

Mr. Lansdale will come in his car and pick you up at --

JOE

--Lansdale. He's the man I'm reading about. This paper tells
all about how he meets his girl and where he takes her...And,
Emily, do you know who Mrs. Lansdale's girl is?

EMILY (AFTER A PAUSE)

Yes, I do.

JOE

Does everybody know...except me?

-47-

EMILY

They seem to.

JOE

Do you know what is very sad about this? The heartbreaking part of it is that I don't care....I must have stopped loving her some time ago, and I didn't know it...not until this minute! ...Somewhere in this rat race, somewhere along the line we lost each other..

EMILY (SOFTLY)

I'm sorry you had to --

JOE

-- What became of her? The dream girl of my college days? There was a time when if she danced with another boy and he held her close, there would be murder in my heart...Now she's Lansdale's girl, and it means no more to me than just another cheap little setup, like so many that pass through this office every day...They have no faint resemblance to love. There's nothing real about any of it...nothing real about the whole place...What am I doing here? What am I doing here?

(MUSIC: DURING LAST OF ABOVE BRING IN INTRODUCTION FOR "COME HOME" AS HE ALMOST SHOUTS "WHAT AM I DOING HERE?" ...MARJORIE STARTS TO SING...)

MARJOR (FILTER)

Come home, come home,
Where the brown birds fly
Through a pale, blue sky,
To a tall green tree,
There is no finer sight for a man to see...

(MORE)

-48-

MARJORIE (GONT'D)

Come home, Joe, come home!

Come home and lie

By a laughing spring,
Where the breezes sing
And caress your ear.

There is no sweeter sound for a man to hear,
Come home, Joe, come home.

You will find a world of honest friends who miss you...

You will shake the hands of men whose hands are strong...

And when all their wives and kids run up and kiss you,
You will know that you are back where you belong...

You'll know you're back

Where there's work to do,

Where there's love for you...

For the love you give,

There is no better life for a man to live...

Come home Joe, come home.

Come home, son, come home....

(SHE FADES OFF ON THE LAST FEW BARS OF THIS...AND ON THE LAST
NOTE SHE IS BARELY AUDIBLE..)

EMILY (COMING IN OVER LAST SUNG NOTE)
Feeling better, doctor?

JOE
What?...Oh, Emily...yes, I ...I went kind of haywire, I guess.

EMILY
I liked it fine.

DENBY (OFF...CALLING)
Oh, Joe...Joe!

-49-

JOE

I can't see Denby now. I just can't.

DENBY

Here he is, Brook, still in his office. Mrs. Lansdale and I
have been waiting for you, Joe.

LANSDALE

Hurry up, Joe. I've got the car downstairs.

DENBY

Wait a minute, Brook. Why don't we tell him now?

LANSDALE

Might as well. Give him time to compose a speech on the way
over...

DENBY (UP)

Charlie...Oh, Charlie, you might as well come in and hear this.

CHARLIE (COMING ON)

What's up? What's afoot?

DENBY

I had had high hopes that one day you might receive this honor,
Charlie, but Joe here beat you out...and not by any narrow
margin either.

JOE

Doctor Denby, I don't understand.

DENBY

Tell him, Brook.

LANSDALE

Joe, My boy, you're about to be made Physician-in-chief to the
hospital. Youngest man ever appointed. You'll be the head
man. We are making Bigby Denby President of the Medical Board.

-50-

DENBY

I'm being kicked upstairs. Ha! Ha!

LANSDALE

What do you say?

JOE

Well, I'm knocked over. I don't know what to say.

DENBY

What do you say, Emily?

EMILY (DRYLY)

Well, gee willikers!

LANSDALE

Hope Joe isn't so tongue-tied when he gets in front of the
trustees. Come on, Joe, we're late...

JOE (GOING OFF)

Yes, I know...but I'm not...I mean...

DENBY (GOING TOO)

I know one little lady who'll be proud of her husband today!

(SOUND: DOOR CLOSES OFF)

CHARLIE

What're you thinking about, Nursie?

EMILY

Just thinking how hard it is for a man to get off a merry-go-
round after it gets going fast.

CHARLIE

You couldn't expect him to turn down a plum like this. Being
head man at our hospital makes a fellow one of the big men in
medicine.hereabouts.

-51-

## EMILY

Big politician, big social lion, and banquet man. Not much of a doctor. He could've been, though...When he first came here, I thought ...I hoped...

## CHARLIE

I can understand a girl getting stuck on a fellow like that. Wouldn't blame her.

## EMILY

Thanks, pal.
(PAUSE)

## CHARLIE

Want to take the day off and go to a burlesque show?

## EMILY

I don't know. I think the dedication ceremony will be funnier.

## CHARLIE

Okay. We'll go there.

## EMILY

Can we stop on the way and have a drink?

## CHARLIE

A drink? We'll get cockeyed. How else can you go to such things?

(MUSIC: BRIDGE)

(SOUND: SMATTERING OF APPLAUSE)

## LANSDALE

And now, gentlemen, it is my pleasure and honor to present the man to whom we are dedicating this bronze tablet in the new private pavilion...Bigby Denby, M.D....Physician, scientist, humanitarian...and better than all these...an executive!

(SOUND: APPLAUSE)

-52-

## LANSDALE

To use his own phrase, he has been a "good soldier". Bigby
Denby has for years...

## CHORUS (WIPES HIM OUT...)

Broccoli Hogwash Balderdash,
Phoney, Baloney, Tripe and Trash.
No one knows where his youth has gone,
No one knows where his heart has gone,
But the talk talk talk goes on and on and on and on and on
Yatata yatata yatata yatata
yatata yatata, yatata, yatata...

(CONTINUE SOFTLY AS DENBY STARTS HIS SPEECH)

## DENBY

Mr. Chairman, trustees, friends... The cup of my happiness
runneth over. My heart is so full, words fail me. And yet...

## CHORUS

The prattle and the tattle,
The gab and the gush,
The chatter and the patter
And the twaddle and the tush
Go on and on and on and on and on!

## DENBY (FADING BACK ON)

My co-worker, my young but very talented friend, Joseph Taylor,
Junior... The youngest man ever to receive this appointment.

(SOUND: APPLAUSE... FADE IT QUICKLY AND HOLD IT LIGHT UNDER
CHORUS)

-53-

## CHORUS

Look out, Joe.
Once you cross this threshold
The door will close behind you...
(SOUND: APPLAUSE STOPS...)

## JOE

Ladies and gentlemen, this comes to me as a complete surprise.
I look upon this appointment as a challenge. One must approach
with deep humility the task of succeeding so illustrious a
predecessor as Doctor Bigby Denby.

(SOUND: APPLAUSE)

He has been an ornament to medicine,
An ornament to his city
An ornament...

## CHORUS

---Ornament!

A man's mind is sometimes cleared
By the sudden light of one word.
In the flash of a split second
He sees a signpost, pointing down a new road.
And he may take a new turning
That will affect the rest of his life...

## JOE (A DIFFERENT NOTE IN HIS VOICE)

It takes a special talent to be an ornament.
I am not blessed with this talent!

## ALL

What? What's that he's saying? Did you hear what he said?
Etc...

-54-

CHORUS (START QUIETLY IN E.G. DURING THIS)

One foot, other foot

One foot, other foot

(KEEP THIS UP UNDER JOE'S SPEECH)

JOE

I must therefore...I must therefore decline the appointment.

JENNY

You can't do that, Joe.

JOE (DOWN)

Please, Jenny. (UP) I have another offer in a small hospital, where my father is physician in chief. I'll be his assistant.

JENNY

You fool.

JOE

Please, Jenny.

JENNY

You talk like an idiot school-boy. The big city is a wicked place and all the people in small towns are good and pure.

JOE (QUIETLY)

No, I don't say that. You came from a small town...Big towns are filled with good people and bad people, good doctors and bad doctors. I just happened to strike the wrong crowd. So all I can do is go back among people I know I can help...and start all over again. I'm going home!

CHORUS

Come home, come home, where the brown birds fly,
Through a pale blue sky,
To a tall green tree....

(MORE)

-55-

## CHORUS (CONT'D)

There is no finer sight for a man to see..
Come hom, Joe, come home!

## DENBY (DURING LAST LINE OF SONG)

Joe, you can't do this. What'll I tell the papers.

JOE

Why don't you tell them just what I said?

LANSDALE

Tell the papers he's just a small town doctor.

JOE

Okay, tell them that!!!

## CHORUS

Now you can do whatever you want,
Whatever you want to do..

## EMILY

Doctor Taylor, wait a minute...Can you use a nurse back there?

## CHORUS

Here you are in a wonderful world
Especially made for you.

## CHARLIE

Hey, what about me?

JOE (OFF)

Come on.

## ALL (WITH INCREASING VOLUME AND SPIRIT)

One foot, other foot
One foot, other foot,
Now you can do whatever you want,

(MORE)