The Last Dying Words
OF THE
Retail Shopkeepers,

Who departed this Life, on the 13th of June, 1785.

YOU, fee in us a melancholy instance of the depravity of the times. We are not, like other offenders, doom'd to die for our diffipation, floth, or idlenefs, but for our Plodding Induſtry, and Laudable Labour. Nor have we been convicted by a Jury of our Peers, but by the arbitrary verdiſt of a young man, that was appointed to the helm, but did not know how to guide it; therefore, instead of going to windward, he fell many leagues to leeward; and the enemy meeting with him, he very nearly escaped; but, being acquainted with the Back Stairs, he well knew the safe retreat.

It is true, "We have fallen into a PIT which we made for ourſelves," and no eye shall pity us; but when you reflect what calamity our heavy ſentence will bring upon our helpleſs families, even to the third and fourth generations, your hearts will ſurely relent, and in ſackcloth and in aſhes weep over our unhappy end.

Difſtressing as our ſituations now are, ere we take our departure hence, we cannot forbear ſhedding a tear of pity at our country's fate. The crouded ſtreet of our flourishing cities ſhall be thinned, our villages become deferts, and no plenty ſhall be seen ſmiling on our plains; for our tax maſters have given us no Straw, nor Bricks, but have deprived us of the ſun's enlivening beams, and ſhut us up in Dreary Darkneſs.--- And to what corner of the world can you fly for ſuccour? Your northern neighbours are involved in the fame calamities as yourſelves; your ſifter kingdom is endeavouring to wreſt your commerce from you; and you cannot, like your oppreſſed forefathers, ſEEK for refuge beyond the wide atlantic!---O hapleſs children!---Your lot is ſtill more ſevere than ours. We depart this life with our country's glory; but you are left to drag out a miferable exſtence in a more miferable land---a land that ſhall now become the ſcoſſ of all the nations upon earth.

"To this complexion have we come at laſt," for endeavouring, in a circumſcribed, though honest way, to provide for you, and ourſelves; but rich rogues have eſcaped from puniſhment; for, alas! GLITTERING GOLD, and not Sterling Merit, now eſures ſucces.

But we will detain you no longer. We fee you already too much aſſected; but we beg of you, "Weep not for US, but for yourſelves, for your children, and for your country."

Having ſaid theſe words, they were launched into eternit}', and were interred all in one PIT, in Downing-ſtreet, Westminſter. Never was there a more ſorrowful ſcene beheld. The multitude of ſpectators expreſſed their grief in numberleſs groans, and with moving melancholy accompanied the DECEASED to the grave. A general mourning * was obſerved throughout the land; and the Judge who paffed the ſentence nearly eſcaped being torn in pieces; but, as aforeſaid, was protected, and got ſafe down the ſtair-ſaſe.

* The ſhops were mostly ſhut up in London on the 14th June, when the odious tax paffed.