NEW YORK LIFE INSURANCE COMPANY

March 26/934

The Missus now speaking:

Hello, Je-un! Never no more do you go roaring off to New York or any other York with anyone but your faithful bodyguards aboard with you. No, Siree! Look your last on that sinful city, until you are prepared to go to it accompanied by Valet and Secy.!!!!

What is there for me to say, with everything said, as usual, by your CO. I give up! But we'll send him out for beer or a steak when you get back here, so that I can spill all the beans to you at one time before he can get in a word edgewise. We'll fix him!!!

We shall miss you in Portage at Easter and shall be thinking of you. Don't remain away too long. And don't forget the writing that may still be done in Portage. Billie goes to Bonnie Oaks the first of May. The clan will be foregathered before the Spring is spent. Better be thinking about coming on back!

Happy Easter to you, and every good wish for your success. It is bound to come, so don't be champ'ing at the bit, as I do now and then. It leads, you see, to fishwiving---which hath also its masculine prototype.!!!!!!!

Love to you,

39 W 10

NYC Feb 19 36

Dear TK,

As much as I want it otherwise, it does seem to me that the time has come for you and Chaunse to separate, but separate in a certain way. I am, as you know, as reluctant as you and he to come to this conclusion, for have felt - and had reason to feel - from the very beginning that you and he really had something for each other, needed each other, and had many essential points in common. And, to mention only this - you and he have been through such difficulties together, fought them through so splendidly. However, though we must not forget those past meanings and achievements, yet must we deal with what is actually now present. And this actual present seems to be this: that neither you nor Chaunse can move. You are locked and blocked. He locks you. You lock him. The situation you both are in locks both. And, instead of having a living relationship, you merely have the relationship of blocking - with all this means - and you but drudge, and he but drags, and both are frayed with nerves raw, and both spin, and protests pile up, and both are desperate - and more than desperate when and if you can see no way out. So you must find and make a way out, you must break that locked situation, and I'm pretty sure you need a rest from each other.

Now one of the main things is to arrange and implement this rest reasonably and with mutual goodwill and good feelings. Don't reach the point where you are exploded into it. The explosion will damage something, as explosions always do. Manage it with reason, so that it is a conscious act, and not just a reaction.

As I see it at present, the thing to do is for one of you to leave the cottage and go elsewhere. Bob's presence may prove a complication in this regard. But this complication, as well as others, must be met, solved, and overcome. The idea is to effect a temporary and, in the best sense, an experimental separation between you and Chaunse, so that you go ahead and live your life for a while free from him, so that he goes ahead and lives his life for a while free from you. This is the idea - and now comes the question of how and where to effect it.

As a matter of hard fact, I don't think that the cottage would be liveable for either of you without the other. You need a man on the place. He needs a woman on the place. But let us for the moment consider the possibility of one or the other staying at the cottage without the other, for a while. If Chaunse stayed, he might be able to find and hire a girl to come in, do certain things for Bob, and certain things about the house. If you stayed - I don't see much that you could do to get help. A man could swing such a thing much better than a woman, it seems to me. In any case, let's move on to the next consideration. If one

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or the other of you leaves, where will you leave to? Where will you go, what will you do? You, TK, could come on to NY, stay here at the house, rest for a while, and then venture forth on your own or sometimes with Swusan to see what the big city has to offer. Or again, you and Swusan might be able to work out something together, something that give you both something to do and at the same time bring in a little money. This is the idea. If it is vague on the practical plane it is vague only because ideas often are vague in their application until you actually do begin to apply them. Then only can you see detailed possibilities.

There is one matter I want to mention at once. For the sake of many things, it would be wise, first, to keep your difficulties quite distant from Portage people, and second, if and when you do separate, keep the facts of the case strictly to yourselves and to others give the information that you or Chaunse or both of you are simply going off on a trip, or have decided to try life elsewhere - but not that you are separating, even if experimentally. The news that you two had "busted up" would needlessly "bust up" many other things of possible future benefit to you both. What I am saying is this: keep your trials and experiments to yourselves. It is your private business only. If, later on, it works out that you actually and finally do separate for good, then this is another matter. This, if you will, is something for other people to know - and, of course, they will know it, even if you tried to hide it from them. But be sure of your ways in yourselves, before you give people any chance to jump ahead and reach conclusions that you yourselves have not yet reached. This is a principle for living; and, in the present case, it is wise practice.

Should you, TK, for example, go into Portage, get a job there, and live in Portage - let it be known that you are doing this for the sufficiently reasonable need and wish to earn money. Others will think what *xu* they will; let them. But don't give them any cause to think that you and Chaunse have busted up, unless and until you actually have.

The just above is another idea. You, TK, might go into Portage, live there mostly, get a job - and in this way effect a rest and a separation.

Or both of you might leave the cottage, Chaunse living in Portage and doing business there, you staying at BO until you get your breath, until some energy and desire to do comes vitally alive in you - and then decide where you'll go, what you'll do.

The main idea is to bring about an end of your present locked situation. This is imperative for both of you - and for all who have your well-being at heart.

I am satisfied that the cottage situation, as is, and as was since your going into it, has finished for you both. You have gotten

all either of you can from it - and any further continuation
would mean increased wretchedness without increased profit
in any way.

We here hope that the check each month will ease things.
We are sending it for this purpose, among others. But we
also hope that it will help implement a new move, a situation,
a new condition.

Neither of you can move to something new without some
financing. All right. Say goodby to what has been. Meet
and talk it out with each other, as friends, as people placed
in the same situation as from which they both want to
escape and be liberated. Discuss ways and means as if you two
were in truth mutually marrooned on a desert island. Forget
all differences and protests. Remember and fasten on the
one essential reality, namely, that you are in a pocket with
which you have finished, that from this pocket you want to
get out. Make your plans as best you can, and as clearly,
first of all without regard to whether or not you have the
money. Then see what you need in order to carry out these
plans. And let us know. If it can be done, we'll let you
know. If it can't, we'll let you know this too. The main
thing is to go ahead. Both of you, as I realize only too
well because of my own similar experiences, are also blocked
and tied by the economic factor. Indeed this factor may and
doubtless often does loom larger than all the rest put to-
gether. And indeed it is a main factor in your present
situation. But now - break through the hold it has on you,
break through the psychology of it, assume for the time that,
in so far as this item is concerned, you can do whatever
you reasonably plan to do. Keep your feet on the ground, but
assume for the time that you are fully empowered to carry
out your best decisions. Think largely and deeply. Meet
this crisis in terms of its large issues. See and realize
yourselves not simply as man and wife in this situation but
as human beings on this planet, searching and struggling
for the right way of carrying through. I know, when your
stomach is hungry, when your heart aches, when your body
is crippled and belabored, it seems absolutely sheer nonsense
to believe that a right attitude - anything as immaterial
as that - has anything to do with it, or can offer any
way to a solution. But believe me, a right attitude must
proceed all else. Get hold of it, and the rest - God being
willing - will begin to work out.

Now this to both of you. I did not really expect that
when you returned to Portage from here you would sit down
each week and send me a "bulletin". It wasn't possible and
it wasn't necessary. But now I do want the God's honest
truth from both of you, regularly. Else, at this distance,
I can't be of full help. And what does le Cap mean by the
God's honest truth, in this instance? He means, dammit,
that he wants from you, CO, also those matters, those
needs and desires, which your pride and your stubbornness
and your protests and your sitting on your ass are wont to

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hold back. If you don't break through these self-indulged drags, at this time, at least with me, then by God, CO, I'm going to take them out in the pasture and - you know. He means further, dammit, that he wants from you, TK, also those matters, those needs and desires, which your pride and fears and doubts and insecurity and your clinging to the past are wont to hold back. If you don't break through --- the same fate awaits them.

I mean that I want you both to step clean and clear out of those pictures of yourselves, those pictures and all pertains to them. They are worse than dead skin on a snake. You have finished with them. Let them go. Break them, lest they break you. This is by no means all that's the matter with you. No, I realize that there are real things the matter. But I tell you with the voice of thunder that you are being crucified also by these pictures. Chaunse's picture in particular has nailed him on the cross ever since I've known him - and I've known him lives before this life. He is in this life to overcome his pride and his stubbornness and get down to real functioning. Right now is the time. Break through, CO: For God's sake, for my sake, for TK's, for everyone who has your well-being at heart, break through. You are ready to do something. Only the drags of broken parts hold you down, only these drags as retained, supported and fed by the picture, by the power of its pride and and protest and stubbornness.

If you, both of you, do break through, then I can assure you that there will be, that there already is, something positive to do.

And for God's sake don't wonder and worry and cringe before the next step in fear of where it will lead you to. Only ask if be right, only ask if it squares with your real inner needs to the best of your understanding - and then take it, take it in faith and courage and assurance.

This is one of your stations. This is one of your crossroads. You have had others. You doubtless will have more. But this is this one, an extremely vital one. According to what you do now, you will either be useless for some time, or useful to yourselves and to others perhaps for the rest of your lives. So meet it in terms of its importance. Don't meet it in terms of anything less.

And step clear out of those shells.

I can do only if you do.

Box 375
Doylestown Pa

May 21 36

Dear TK,

Out of your efforts and sufferings, this fact stands
out - you and Chaunce cannot live together. I believe and know
and feel that you both have tried, that you both have done all
that was possible under the given conditions. True, some outside
person could point to this or that, and have reason for saying
that if you had done this, if Chaunce had done that, the two of
you would have worked through your difficulties and come out
onto a new level of mutual life and love and affirmation. True
too, you have reason for saying of him that if he...and he has
reason for saying that if you... But the fact and the truth is
that whatever the ifs, it so worked out disharmony accumulated
faster than harmony - nor was it possible to reverse this. So
had you gone on, you would have increasingly hurt and torn each
other. It is best that you have separated.

To there are these facts. You and Chaunce cannot live
together. You and he have separated. The questions that arise
are not questions of the past but questions of the present and
of the future. How best to think and feel and live so that the
negative results of the past will be worked out or eliminated,
so that the positive results will grow and flow to enrich your
future. These questions of course cannot be answered at once,
but just the asking of them tends to establish the right attitudes
and the right frame of mind.

Inevitably there will be questions of the past. As I
think of you two, as I recall all I know, as I remember the way
the two of you came together that summer with a deep human need
of each other, as I see your struggles and triumphs through that
very difficult period in Milwaukee, I too ask Why? Why has it
happened as it has? Ith you, I know certain of the causes - and,
in a way, they are enough to explain it. Indeed in view of
certain of these causes, one might even say that it was extra-
ordinary that you and Chaunce worked and lived along together as
long as you did. But, deep in me, I still question. I feel -
and believe me I feel much and deeply about it all - that none
of these causes gives a key to the profound explanation. Perhaps
we will never know the profound explanation. This is sure, that
it is best not to try to find it now - for just this attempt
might work to hold you to the past, to stir things up and keep
stirring them up. Best let them settle. Best let them work out
of themselves, for the present at least. Best forget, in so far
as forgetting as is a favorable condition in which to mend and
heal and gather yourself and prepare yourself for future living.

If you cut, then cut cleanly. The break has come, so make
it a clean break. This will be difficult for both of you. It
will be difficult because hurts and aches tend to cling and we
tend to cling to them. Also, it will be difficult because both
of you still have, underneath it all, positive feelings for each
other. You write that you still and still always love him - and

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I am sure you will. As soon as his second letter to me, he writes that he is already thinking of a possible reconciliation, and that during the days immediately after you left, he wanted nothing as he wanted reconciliation. It will be a splendid to have and nourish these positive feelings - and something, perhaps a fine friendship, may come of them in the future. But the only way in which something fine can come of them in the future, is that the break now be made clean and final. The way you have lived is finished. So let it be. For the present and the immediate future, you must live and work out your life in a different way with different people in other surroundings. So must he. I will do all I can to help make this possible for him. Today a letter goes to him, a letter both practical and psychological, and I have hopes that my practical suggestions as well as the general considerations will help him to keep hold of himself and to gather the fragments of his broken self and his broken world - to start afresh.

I remember, TK, those times of crisis and deep feelings when the three of us worked out things together. This again is such a time - and the fact that you and he have separated changes the pattern, but from my point of view it does not alter the essential relationship. He is still Chaunce. You are still you. I am still I. Your separation from him does not mean a separation from me or from my life or from the kind of world I am trying to build. In the future as in the past, you have your place and your being with me and with us, to the extent that you want to have them, to the extent that we can really function together.

Marjorie has her own deep feelings and thoughts about it all. One of these days before long she may write you. Her letters are like that. A letter grows in her, and then suddenly one day it comes out.