287.

I sit here being my own Boswell although I've vowed to turn
everything I do from now on into money.

Beautify, you won't cry. It's no miracle that this house came my
way—though it seems almost magically suitable. I came its way!
Persistence rewarded by discovery.

Krishna, why can't you be more loving—you're everything else that I
want you to be. But . . . back to the refinements of Henry James. Leon
Edel: 'He was now face to face with a long summer and did not know where to
turn.' I turned towards Ceylon, Bali, even Bangkok, then with naive faith,
Kashmir—nothing worked out. So I came back to Kathmandu and by the time
August had arrived I'd made the decision to move from the Snow Leopard
Hotel into this palatial structure, bringing Krishna with me. My love of
the house and my love for Krishna both have grown. 'He talked much of
abandoning London for the English countryside but shrank from doing so.
He would have to face solitude and work and he had no appetite for
either.' . . . Some would say that I'm being sidetracked again (from
writing) into an art show . . . 'the necessary smallness, singleness of the
subject.'

In *Meaningless*, what do we have? A thoroughly vicious little boy
(and not so little) in the person of Maria's 15-year-old brother. The
entire novel must be replanned. We know that Maria's fiancée becomes
insanely jealous of the actor-director Lucifer. Out of a wish to destroy
'Lucy' in Maria's eyes, Mario seduces him. But Maria goes off with Gloria
and Lucifer just the same—they leave on the same ferryboat for Athens.

Gloria's uncle Ben Mason, is attracted to Mario, never makes it
with him. Little Brother Evtikio has a yen to bed with Uncle, just for the

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money. Uncle spurns him. Uncle gets murdered by him. But before the
murder is committed, Evtikio is fucked by Mario.

What about Maria? She's finally the freest of all, free of Mario,
and reconciled to the fact that Lucy is not for her. Who is Lucifer for?
For nobody; for his art and ambition. What about Gloria? She's more
attached to Lucifer than ever, even though she hasn't gone to bed with him.
And why is she attached—? Because she's an actress. She and Lucifer seem
to have the ideal attachment—they're close to each other because their
excitement is non-physical. Mario—who has won the most (can't we have him
seduce Gloria as well as Lucy) has lost the most—the three with whom he's
been emotionally involved have left on the same boat. He takes it out, in
a way, on Little Brother. But why is _Little Brother_ such a loser?

And why can't Uncle and Mario be making it? They can.

x

## Synopsis

Gloria and Lucifer arrive to stay with Gloria's uncle. Gloria's
Uncle Ben has a lover, Mario, who falls in love with Gloria. Gloria,
however, is not interested in Mario, she's interested in Lucifer. Lucifer
is not particularly interested in sex, at least not as a participant. In
order to lower Lucifer in Gloria's eyes, Mario decides to get him to play
the passive role, not with himself, but with Maria's 15-year-old brother,
Evtikio. He incites Evtikio to try to seduce Lucifer—Lucifer if not
interested in Little Brother, the closest Little Brother can get to
'seducing' him is to rub off against Lucifer's thigh, as Lucy lies reading

289.

a book in the dunes. But Little Brother tells Mario that he screwed
Lucifer, and Mario tells Maria. She's indifferent to the revelation.
Then he tells Gloria. She, too, registers indifference. Then he makes a
clumsy attempt to seduce Gloria, is repulsed. She tells her uncle.
Uncle throws Mario out of the house.

As long as there's life, there's art. 'I shall endeavor to be
thrilling,' Henry said.

What will be the attitude of the police when I go back? My
notion is that if they plan to take any reprisal at all they'll wait until
I apply for a visitor's permit—and this is not applied for until a two
months' residence has transpired. So what have I to worry about? Sis
thinks I should worry, says I take the whole episode of Manolis's story
too lightly. But I know the Greeks better than she does (she doesn't know
them at all). Here comes the gardener. Do I know the Nepalese?

If something feels good—such as a caress or a kiss—they take it
for what it is—something that feels good.

When is he going to marry my sister? What's going on between him
and Mr. Mason? These are questions that Maria's young brother asked him-
self, in regard to Mario—typical double-playing Greek. And it soon
becomes triple-play when Gloria comes on the scene. The most emotional
of the lot is Ben Mason. He's thoroughly disgusted with his lover's falling
in love, in a manner of speaking, with his niece. He recounts all this to
Lucifer, who is a good listener.

Maria's crush on Lucifer is where the trouble begins. Sophisticated
Gloria is entertained by the situation, though she too is attracted to
Lucifer (without any erotic fulfillment). Mario would like to withdraw from

290.

his sexual relationship with Mr. Mason, has the idea that Little Brother
might take his place, What happens on the last day: Maria is packing to
go to Athens on the same ferryboat with Gloria and Lucifer. Mario would
like to keep her from going because he thinks that the real reason for her
going is her infatuation with Lucy. So Mario, lying, tells her that he
has made love with Lucy that very day, on the beach. She laughs at him.

Mario and Little Brother see the trio off, then go to the dunes and—
through the initiative of Mario—make love. Mario, having been told by
Mr. Mason not to come around any more, tells Evtikio, You go around,
maybe you can get more out of him than I did. That night the boy goes to
the house of the American and ends by choking him to death, then slashes
his throat.

## Outcomes . . . emotional and 'interpersonal' dilemmas. . . .

Maria will begin a new life, thanks to the influences she has felt—
towards freedom—emanating from Lucifer and Gloria.

The fatherless adolescent is the real victim—not the Expatriate
American. The American lies dead on the stairway—the boy is the victim
of his own murdering hands.

The most unchanged? Lucifer, integral artist from the beginning.
And Gloria? What metamorphosis, if any, has the summer conferred? What
has been her real role? She flirted shamelessly with Mario, then let him
down. She even encouraged Maria's infatuation with Lucifer—just to see,
irresponsibly, what would happen—in the end nothing does, and Gloria has
Lucifer back to what they were—nothing changed for her, nothing has
changed for Lucifer. For Maria, things have changed for the better. The
Uncle, dead, is beyond any change or changes. Little Brother's life has

291.

been changed to ruin. And Mario, the loser with nothing to lose, because
he has nothing to give, is in the nowhere where he always was.

## OUTCOMES: A Novel

The episodes are as follows (but not in this order):

1. The American dismisses Mario.

2. Mario attempts seduction of Lucifer.

3. Mario furks Gloria—has already fucked her when the story opens on the last day.

4. Mario's final attempt to dissuade Maria from leaving.

5. The lovemaking of Mario and Little Brother after the departure of the ferryboat—ending with Mario's putting the idea into Little Brother's head that he can make it with the American.

6. The visit to the American's house and his murder.

In Scene 1 we are introduced to the America, he is alone in the house, writing, waiting for the return of his houseguests (niece and Lucy)—but Mario shows up first.

'I thought I told you I don't want to see you anymore.'

Before Mario leaves, in comes Lucifer and Gloria, back from market. This time it's Lucifer who is taken for a ride on the motorcycle of Mario, leaving Gloria alone with her uncle. They are joined by Little Brother looking for Mario. Gloria asks him if Maria is going with them on the boat that evening. Evtikio says, 'Yes, she's packing.' After Evtikio goes out, Uncle gives Gloria a rundown on everything he knows about Little Brother. They discuss Mario and Lucifer. Gloria displays her feelings toward Lucifer.