Prompt:
I know I'm the asshole for that pun, sorry.

Ok so here's the thing, shortly before the quarantine, there was a situation at work. We have a scent sensitive colleague who'd been around for a few months. Naturally, there was a ban on perfumes and scented creams so she can breathe. I'm fine with this. However, she started telling me I needed to change my laundry detergent.

The problem is, I have an allergy to SOMETHING in most laundry detergents. I honestly don't know exactly what it is, but I can basically only use the one or I break out in hives. And while I could realistically test a few different ones and only wash like one shirt in it, I don't really want to go out there spending 15+$ on detergent I'll likely be allergic to, you know? I did ask her what she used and bought some and it did not end well.

Fortunately, I've been working from home and haven't had to deal with this, but I just got an email from work saying we're scheduled back in two weeks and I'm not looking forward to this starting up again.

WIBTA if I refused to change my detergent? Like, I get that breathing is more important than my epidermis, but I can't be breaking out into hives all the time either. X_x ######

Response: NTA. Unless the person or workplace wants to reimburse you, you shouldn’t have to come out of your pocket to do trials. They should be sensitive to both of your issues. And if it’s incompatible, maybe assign you to separate spaces. ######


Prompt:
I’m actually making this post for my mom, because she doesn’t have a reddit account. I’ll show her the results.

Anyways, we went to a Best Buy today to look at TVs because we’re moving, and our TV is ancient and barely works anymore. When we left the store, we heard a dog barking. A dog was left in a car, not running so no AC, with one window barely cracked. It was 85 degrees out today, so the temperature in the car would’ve gotten to 104 after just 10 minutes, 115 after 20. Dogs suffer from heat exhaustion when their body temperature reaches 103 degrees, and are at risk of heat stroke when they reach 106 degrees.

First, my mom when in the store to ask them to page the owner, but the employees refused. My mom then decided to call the police, because we had no way of knowing how long the dog had already been in the car, or how long it would be until the owners got back. My mom didn’t want to risk the dog dying if the owners stayed in the store too long. So she called the police, and waited until they arrived. About 5-10 minutes after we found the dog, the owners got back. My mom let them know that she had called the police, and obviously they were mad at her because of it. They called her “uncaring.” So my mom is doubting herself, thinking maybe she took it too far. What do you think? ######

Response: NTa. Uncaring? You mean, like leaving a dog in a hot car? ######


Prompt:
So this is going to be pretty short and simple.

As me and my partner have been starting to plan out the birth of our child I told him I want the two of us to have some time to just bond with the baby. As I have been looking up the rules due to COVID we realised this wouldn’t be a problem. I am allowed one birthing partner which will be my partner, and he is the only one allowed to visit following the rules.

At first my mum tried to insist that she would be there but quickly agreed that if I wanted my partner then that was fine. However the other day I mentioned that because of COVID we won’t be allowed visits either. She kept saying that she didn’t care and she would still be there and would wait outside to meet the baby if she isn’t allowed in. I get that she’s excited but this felt a little too far for me, as if she was expecting me to give birth and instantly go outside so she could meet her grandchild.

I love my mum to bits but this is kind of pushing me towards not telling her when I go into labour and only telling her when my baby is born (she’ll have about an hour and a half drive to get there anyway) just so I can postpone a little bit of stress. I want her to meet the baby as soon as she can, but I don’t want to be giving birth feeling stressed about it.

Will I be the asshole if I don’t tell her when I go into labour? ######

Response: NTA. Ultimately this is about making sure you have as little stress as you can for giving birth, and without worrying about your babies health etc. Her hurt feelings can be soothed after, a bad labour can cause permanent issues. ######


Prompt:
Throwaway

I am a 55 year old man and my wife is 56. My wife recently got a job in it building I worked at for the past 5 years. I make more than my wife for the same job and I am in a hire position than her and I work longer hours than my wife. My wife thinks that it's sexist that I get payed more than her for the same job and asked me to quit or complain about the sexist pay.

I refused and told her if I quit my job we won't be able to afford the house and we would be homeless and that we won't be able to get grocery plus I told my wife that I have years more experience than her. My wife yelled at me saying it's sexist and asked me if I am supporting sexism in the  work place.

 I told her no I am not but I am not quitting my job. My wife became furious and left and is not talking to me.I feel that my wife is right and I am the asshole hear. So I want to know if I am the bad guy who supports sexism ######

Response: NTA. U have 5 years of experience working for that company, compared to your wife, plus U work longer hours than her. Definitely, you get higher pay, than her. How can it be sexist?! ######


Prompt: So I've been at the same place for 15+ years. Kinda toxic environment with no chance of moving up in the company any time soon. Been looking at another job making more money and about the same benefits since January. Submitted my resume, took their aptitude test and now scheduled for an interview. Nothing promised but outlook is good. AITA if I get it and just turn in my 2 weeks notice or should I mention that I'm applying other places? ######

Response:
 NTA. Two weeks is standard. You owe them nothing more.

Do not tell them you are looking elsewhere. ######


Prompt:
So me and my wife (Jessica) have been together for 6 years now married for 1. However throughout that time my MIL (Julia) has always been a little on the distrustful side when it comes to me. For reference my wife is full German and I am a Puerto Rican.

It started off small so I never really cared, comments like “So Jessica how does it feel to have a taste of brown sugar?” Or one day she made some tacos for everyone and said “I hope I made them just like your mom does!” For those who don’t know tacos are a Mexican dish not a Puerto Rican dish. But none of those comments bothered me because the tacos tasted good and she tried, I get that she’s older and whatnot and she always seemed to be happy to see me so whatever.

But then I proposed to my fiancé and things started to get really weird. Like I’m talking “Oh no now our bloodline isn’t gonna be pure!” She said that as a joke but still really really weird right, but still I but my tongue cause her husband hasn’t said anything and also the entire family seems to love me and Julia actually started to try and learn Spanish.

But then me and Jessica buy a house and move in and Julia was giving Jessica some first house buying advice. Except I overhear her say, “Now you know how those people are ok their families are really close, so if they come to move in out of nowhere you have to fight to keep them out this is your space.” So I said, “Well my family isn’t a bunch of animals so how about you please leave we have a bunch of unpacking to do and in the meantime you can go to hell.”

Needless to say Julia is a total mess and went into a screaming match where “She knew i wasn’t the one for my daughter because she could sense there was something wrong with me.” I stayed quiet throughout the whole thing but now when Julia slammed the door behind her my wife turned to me and said “I get that was messed up but did you have to say that go to hell part asshole.” But seriously dealing with casual racism is enough, AITA? ######

Response: NTA. Tu suegra es una pendeja racista y si sigue con esa mierda no l dejaría entrar a tu casa ni q vea los nietos si deciden tenerlos hasta q deje sus pendejadas. ######


Prompt:
Growing up, my sister had never been supportive of me. We were never very close. I ended moving out very early because we got into a yelling match about her not picking me up from the airport because she got drunk.

A year ago, I moved to a different state for a job and broke up with my then bf. When she came down to help me move, she told me I was a bitch for not letting my ex move in with me because he "loved me". When she went back home, I learned through said ex that she had invited him to dinner and he was going to go. I texted her and told her I was really disappointed that she did that and as my sister she should be supporting my decision to leave a toxic relationship. She then told me I was a disrespect brat and she couldn't believe how entitled I was and that she was disgusted I would even say something like that to her. She then called me a stuck up bitch for shoving it in her face that I'm more successful than she is... When all I did was tell her I felt disrespected.

I decided to cut ties with her and deleted her off social media. When I come visit, I steer clear of her as much as I can. But when I tell people I don't talk to her, they all tell me I'm a brat and need to keep her in my life and forgive everything she does BECAUSE she's my sister... So AITA for cutting ties with her? ######

Response: NTA. Truthfully, people think that you need to be friends with family. You do not. It doesnt matter that she's your sister if she disrespects you. You don't deserve that. At least, I dont think so, based off the information provided. Good for you for realizing that you dont need someone that disrespectful in your life. ######


Prompt:
Background: I dated this guy for 2 almost 3 years. At first everything was fine he is literally the smoothest guy I’ve ever talked to, then all of a sudden something happened with his apartment. He said the lease expired and his landlord was doubling his rent if he renewed it, being 19 at the time I believed him. To make a long story short he drained my bank account, destroyed my car, and left me with PTSD (diagnosed). I now have a restraining order against him. Onto the story.

Approximately a year after we broke up I got an executive chef job at a new restaurant, at this restaurant we had a server who was like a ray of sunshine was personified. Shortly after she turned 18 she started talking about this cool older guy she was hanging out with. She I figured by older she meant 21 or so and just kind of rolled my eyes as she didn’t immediately say anything too alarming.

Then one day she said his name, now his name is really uncommon in the area we’re from, it’s also spelled weird. I asked how it was spelled and she told me, then I asked his age and he was 26 at the time. Finally I asked for a picture and lo and behold it was him.

We were slow so I had one of my line cooks take over and told him to call me if I was busy and same to one of the hosts at the front for her. I went over everything he did to me with her and at the end told her to make her own decisions but he really wasn’t a good guy.

Since that day I’ve had mutual friends of ours and his family (brother, that’s how we met) that I’m friends with tell me that I’m awful.
From their perspective he’s a changed man and I ruined his chance at happiness and I overstepped boundaries. He’s been telling the mutual friends I did it to make him miserable and they’ve been believing him.

From my perspective I was protecting a young girl from making the same mistakes I did.

AITA? ######

Response: NTA. Truth is truth and you encouraged her to make up her own mind. If he wants a different reputation, let him work on it. ######


Prompt:
She snapped me late last night. My "friend." She asked if I would get a letter notarized for her. I thought it was a strange request, because I live in Colorado and in this state the signature must match the ID presented.

I asked her to elaborate on the letter. She said the letter said I am the landlord and her boyfriend lives on my property.

First of all, I'm not a landlord and her boyfriend doesn't live on my property because I don't own property.

Backstory: she lives in public housing and the housing authority found out that her boyfriend lives with her. To prevent eviction, she had to submit letter today that stated her boyfriend lives elsewhere.

She basically asked me to perjure myself. I said no.

But if she was a true friend, she would never have asked me this. Am I right?

I'm angry with her. I don't feel sorry for her. And I do hope she gets evicted.

And I feel like the asshole! ######

Response: NTA. True friends don’t ask their friends to break the law for them and this sounds like something that can very easily be found out. ######


Prompt:
I'm working at home now taking calls about people's loans. I got a call from some woman asking some info about her payment history and then requested a copy. So I said I'd send her a full payment report. And then *click click* "Done"

Silence for a bit. And the she asked "Are you sending it?"

I told her I just did. And then she got a little irritated. "That's it?" she said in an irritated tone.

"Yes, I already sent it." She then said "what's with your attitude?"

I said everything in a very neutral tone so I was confused. I simply said "Everything is done. Do you have any more questions?"

She then ranted at me a bit about how I was apparently acting cocky because I did that "too quickly" and easily. So I simply explained to her that it takes only a few clicks to email the info she had requested. And then she screamed "that's not the point!" and screamed a bit more and swore at me before hanging up.

All I did was send her the info she requested in a quick manner. I'm confused. So am I an asshole? ######

Response: NTA. Tone police are garbage people who are offended by anything short of theatrically fake enthusiasm by customer service workers. They do not deserve an extra second of your self doubt. Unfortunately, you are likely to encounter them from time to time in any customer facing role. ######


Prompt:
I (20F) am half Korean, half white. Most of my life, I ignored my Korean side. Lately, though, I've been trying to get more into the culture. I've been learning about different traditions, the culture, the language, and using the Korean name my grandfather gave me. My immediate family was never close to my Korean side of the family, but we were close to my grandfather.

My Korean name, for as long as I can remember, has been 지해, romanized as Jihae. I looked it up and it means sea, which I feel like suits me. I've always been drawn to the water.

Recently my sister was talking to my father and found out our names end with 혜, not 해. It's romanized "hye" instead of "hae," though it's pronounced the same (hay). Traditionally, siblings share a syllable, which is why my sister insists on me using "지혜". However, it's a tradition that's slowly dying out in younger generations.

I don't like 지혜. It doesnt feel like me, and I've been continuing to use 지해. However, the more my sister eggs me on about it, the more I worry I'm disrespecting my grandfather. I can't ask him about it since he passed years ago.

AITA for spelling my name how I always have?

Edit: The new spelling changes the meaning of the name. The new name means "wisdom." ######

Response: NTA. To be fair, with all due respect to your grandfather, a name is something one should be happy with so just use whatever makes you feel good. You surely don't mean ill, so there's no real reason to worry - it's not like you're hurting anyone or whatever. ######


Prompt:
A couple days ago my wife mentioned that our daughter wanting her ears pierced for her upcoming 7th birthday.

I was caught by surprised with this conversation as my daughter had gotten her ears pierced just the year before. My wife proceeded to clarify that our daughter wanted 3 piercings in each earlobe like herself. What surprised me even more that my wife mentioned that she had already told our daughter she would take her to get them done for her birthday.

I explained to my wife that I did not think it was a good idea for our daughter to have that many piercings so young. My wife disagreed and said she doesn't understand how it is different to getting the first holes which I was o.k with. She said that if I did not want our daughter to get them done then I would have to be the one to tell her no given she doesn't want to rescind on her gift.

I was not pleased with the move my wife pulled and don't see why I have to be the bad guy in all of this by being the one to tell our daughter she can't get her ears pierced when in my opinion it shouldn't have been agreed in the first place. AITA here for saying no or is my reaction warranted? ######

Response: NTA. Three piercings per ear at age 7 is just silly and ridiculous. ######


Prompt:
So we have 3 kids, 17, 15, and 10. I’m only a quarter Japanese but spent ~7 years in Japan when I was a teenager living with my parents there. I’m pretty fluent as my job requires a lot of Japanese as well.

My wife doesn’t speak Japanese at all and only speaks English. A few years ago my oldest and second oldest wanted to learn Japanese in school which she initially encouraged. Recently they’ve gotten to the point where they can understand great but still struggle to have the confidence to speak out loud. So sometimes at home I’ll practice with them for short periods of time. Like “how was your day, what did you have for lunch, etc.” They’re not advanced enough to hold long deep convos.

This has increasingly bothered my wife because she doesn’t understand and always assume we are talking about her (we’re not, it’s all very basic stuff). It has gotten to the point where she has instituted a house-wide ban on all Japanese because she thinks its exclusionary to her and our youngest and bad for family unity. Ive tried to calm her fears but I also don’t think having 5-10 minutes of Japanese conversation every day is bad for the whole family. She told me that in the US it’s universally rude to have conversations of any length that not everyone can understand.

However when she’s not around I’ll still speak to my kids in Japanese now and then. Recently our youngest heard us speaking Japanese very briefly in the backyard and told mom. My wife came home that night apoplectic and threatened to cut off our kids tuition if they insist on disrupting our family harmony. Then we had a massive fight between the two of us where she accused me of betraying her and making her look like the bad guy in front of the kids.

I feel completely torn, on one hand I did go behind her back to speak in Japanese to our kids, but on the other she was giving 0 wiggle room. But I’m not sure if I handled it poorly. AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA. Threatening to cut off tuition!? Because they keep trying to practice a language? That’s extreme and weirdly controlling.

As long as you don’t do it when your youngest kid and wife are there, there’s nothing exclusionary about it. A housewide ban is ridiculous. ######


Prompt:
I (M21) was recently given a set of wireless ear buds, the type that hang over the ear. A coworker that im close with gave them to me as a gift since he didnt like/use them. These are expensive ones that he was otherwise going to sell online if i didnt want them.

The problem is this. Upon coming home and telling my mother about it and how nice it was for him to gift them to me, she asked, which then became practically begging me to give them to her after i had initially said no. She had gone on to say that she never got to have nice headphones/listenjling apparatus and how she had gotten me nice things in the past.

I didnt really want to give them up, but i also felt guilty about keeping something nice from her. She's someone who's worked very hard to give me a good upbringing and right now we're both working to pay for expenses between the two of us. But I also refrain from buying anything unnecessary because i know we're short on money, while she's usually buying new clothes and shoes now and again.

WIBTA for not wanting to give up an expensive gift? ######

Response: NTA. Those things are like £60. They were gifted to YOU. Perhaps for a birthday you could gift her a set but those ones are yours. ######


Prompt:
Most of your schools probably have had the fundraisers where you sell their wrapping paper or food or something and they give you a prize.

We had one of them come over to my school and I looked at the catalog. If i sold 10 dollars worth of goods i got a prize that was worth like 25 cents. If i sold 25 dollars wroth of goods i got something worth a dollar. If i sold 50 dollars worth of goods i got something worth 5 dollars. If i sold 100 dollars worth of shit i got something worth maybe 10-20 dollars (couldn't find the price of this one online). I can't remember the rest this was all like 5 years ago.

The person was making a presentation telling us how we can raise money for the school. He asked if we had any questions and I then asked him "what percentage of the sales actually go to the school and not to your company?" and he said that "well we can't answer this question but i can tell you a lot of it will go to the school thanks for the question" and before he could say next person i butted in  "what's the point of me spending hours if not days trying to get 100 dollars worth of sales when i can just mow my neighbors lawn for an hour and get 20 bucks to buy the shitty prizes online for a cheaper price?"

Everyone starts laughing at this point and he basically refused to answer the question and told me to sit down. Principal came over and pulled me out and told me to sit in the office and told me i was extremely rude and disrespectful to adults. I became sort of a legend my middle school for this, though i was put on probation and they told me if i ever pulled this shit again i'd be suspended. Fuck my middle school ######

Response: NTA. Those school fundraiser companies are such a scam and you were right to ask how much actually goes to your school (spoiler, if the answer to your question was "I can't answer that", then the school will be lucky to see more than 5% of the sales). On top of that the sales tactics they use to get kids into it are super shady. Good for you seeing a scam and calling it out. ######


Prompt:
im a 14 year old high school freshman and my mom and i were just having a conversation like normal, but then she asked me whether or not i’d let her live with me when i was an adult and got married. i answered no because if i were to be married, the only people i’d want to live with are my wife and my kids (if i had any), and it’s likely that my would-be-wife would agree with me.

but my mom then got upset and kept accusing me of not wanting to care for her when she grew old but i explained that i wouldn’t want to live with her but i would still take care of her. she continued and compared me to my older sister, who said that she’d be fine with letting my mom live with her and her husband.

i don’t think i’m an ass but she’s really upset at that and there’s this weird tension between us now ######

Response: NTA. This would be controlling behavior regardless of how old you are, but it's especially bad since you're only 14. You would likely be miserable if your mom moved in with you as an adult. ######


Prompt:
Like a lot of people, I had to save up and buy my own car. I was lucky to find an old Volvo in 2016 when I started my freshman year of college. All 4 of my siblings got cars from my parents but times changed and they couldn't afford one for me.

My sister who I love has crashed 2 of her cars. Each time my other siblings pitched in to buy her another car. At the time it didn't really bother me since I had my own car. In 2019 my Volvo had major mechanical failures and the repairs would cost more than the value of the car. I had a job but I still couldn't afford the repairs. So I spent my senior year of college without a car. Thankfully the bus system was amazing and it took me to my job and other places I needed to go. In January my sisters car broke down but it still works.

I woke up last week to a new car in the driveway and for a few minutes, I thought it was mine. When it was given to my sister I lost it. Everyone in my family was home and I let them have it. She doesn't have a job so she doesn't need it for work. This is her third car. My internship couldn't bring me on full time so I can't afford to buy a car. I am still pissed off at what happened. They knew I need a car and they bought her one. ######

Response:
 NTA. This whole “you’re not entitled” line of reasoning sometimes goes too far here. If your family’s internal culture is to pull together and help each other *when you can*, and you’ve participated in that as a general rule, then heck yes you’re entitled to their help when it’s your turn. That’s the dynamic that’s been set up in your family and what you’ve been raised to believe in, not just “expect”.

For the people here wishing to be pedantic, the fact is, you may not be entitled to a car, but you ARE entitled to reciprocation. ######


Prompt: I told her I felt it was misleading to make me think she couldn’t afford to pay for her car battery if times were so tough and she can justify getting her nails done when I’m struggling to make it myself. Mind you she is on a fixed income, disabled, retired, and receives government compensation (social security/disability/drives Uber) for all of her bills, necessities, and fun. I’m a healthcare worker who works full time with 2 roommates out of work and on unemployment applying to grocery stores for work. We are making it work but I am trying to support us adoring this crisis with what I can but I can’t help but feel this is super selfish and wrong. ######

Response: NTA. This wasn’t okay. You aren’t obligated to financially support your mother and she manipulated you into doing so while using her money for unnecessary things. Not cool. ######


Prompt:
I (23F) am gay, I came out to my family when I was 18 and my family reacted pretty well. Sometimes my mom will say like low key homophobic things but it’s really whatever.

I’ve been dating a girl (23F)(Let’s call her K) for about three years now, and I took her home to meet my parents last week. My parents like her and all which is good. But this is the convo my mom, K and I had last night.
We were all sitting in the living room and she randomly says

Mom-“So who’s the man in the relationship?”

Me-“Umm..what?”

Mom-“Whose the man. You know. During sex.”

Me-“What the actual fuck kind of question is that?”

Mom-“I’m your mother. I have the right to know that about you.”

Me-“ No you don’t. Why would you want to know ANYTHING about your daughter’s sex life? What’s wrong with you?”

Mom-“K, you’ll tell me. Which one of you is the man and which one is the woman? Are you the man?”

Me-“ Yeah okay so me and K are tired we are going to bed.”

K and I stand up and start walking up the stairs.

Mom-“It’s just a simple question! Why does it matter so much?”

I tell K to wait on the stairway and I go back down to my mom.

Me-“The fact that you want to know about my sex life is so weirdly disturbing that I don’t even know what to say. What is wrong with you? Jesus Fucking Christ”

I was so weirded out by my mom doing this that we left that morning to go back home to our apartment. My mom has texted me a few times asking why I left and why I wouldn’t answer her questions about my sex life but I’ve ignored her. I do feel bad leaving because I haven’t seen my parents or my siblings in a while but wtf. AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA. This was suuuuuper cringey.

Firstly, she is not entitled to information about your personal life, sex included. Can't believe I'm typing this.

Secondly, this heteronormization of homosexual relationships is just wrong. Wtf is that questipn even supposed to mean. You're obviously **both** the woman in your relationship, duh!
So I'd either go with that or ask her stupid question right back at her. Who's the man and woman in **her** relationship?

Also, even if she were oblivious to all of that. You saying you don't care to answer this question should have been the end of it. Digging her heels in like she did and even continuing to harass you makes her the super AH. ######


Prompt:
Throwaway because this will be obvious on my personal.

I (M17) live with my sister (F16) and my mom and dad. Very recently, my sister has gained about 20000 followers or so on Tik tok and has managed to gain a few sponsorships equivalent to about 500$. This, of course, made all four of us extremely proud of her. However, because of this, my sister has flirted with the possibility of quitting high school to focus on Tik tok and social media full time. My mom and dad both actually want her to do so because they’ve heard about the millions people can make. Of course, this made her extremely happy because she’d quit high school to do something she likes but any sensible person (I think), would say this is a terrible idea. I couldn’t let this happen so I sat down with my mom and dad and showed her a bunch of statistics on how hard it is to really make a living off of social media which thankfully changed their minds. I feel kind of bad because I may have robbed her of some happiness but I have no clue ######

Response: NTA. This was a very poor decision on her part to not finish high school to focus on social media. If something goes wrong with TikTok, she's out of luck. You're not a bad person for doing this because you care for her. ######


Prompt:
I'm a high school teacher. I have one student who didn't pass, and now his mom and some of his other teachers want to have a meeting this afternoon talk about how we can make up the work and get him credit for his classes so he doesn't have to retake them.

This kid couldn't be bothered to show up and do the work all year. He was chronically absent and didn't do anything on the rare occasion he did show up to class when school was still in session. After the schools closed, he had months at home with no new material in my class that he could have used to make up the work. Instead, he put it all off until the last week of the semester and then half-assed everything because he didn't pay attention in class when we learned how to do the work. I feel like he's dug his own grave, and I haven't seen any changes in behavior that suggest he'd actually start trying to do well now.

On top of that, my contract ended a couple days ago. Sure the school said they'll pay me extra for working with him, but it's outside of my contractual duties. And I already have a summer job starting next week, so I don't want or need the extra hours. The only thing pushing me to join this meeting is a sense of guilt because I wouldn't feel like I was doing everything possible and going the extra mile if I don't attend the meeting. He *will* have to do summer school or retake the class next year if I don't join the meeting and offer him a customized path to make up his missing work, but doing so will further eat into my time over the next two weeks as I'll have to schedule Zoom meetings with him and take time to grade his work.

And my wife gets off work early today. We'll probably just end up watching a movie or something, but I'd rather spend the time with my wife. I feel a little petty saying this, but spending time with my wife is more important to me than trying one more time to save a student who has spent all year sabotaging himself.

So would I be the asshole if I skip this meeting? ######

Response:
 NTA. This sucks for the student. Sounds like he's had ample opportunity to get caught up, and squandered it.

Something we tell our kids (16, 13, 6): You are free to choose. You are not free of the consequences of those choices.

This student chose to do nothing all year. The consequence is summer school or repeat the the class next year. That is not your problem. That is a student/parent problem. ######


Prompt:
Some backstory:
     So last November I (18F) moved in with my now ex-boyfriend (22M) to an apartment with 2 other people. These two people are married and we were friends with before moving in together. The husband (20M), we'll call him John, is in the military and his wife (20F), we'll call her Abby, worked part time at some store.
    Recently John came back from a deployment and immediately upon him getting home she got pregnant. Now since she's been pregnant the chores that need to be done around the house haven't been getting down (dishes, trash, etc.). Now we don't take turns doing these chores but previously we had a talk and its a general rule that you wash your own dishes and if you see the trash needs to be taken out just take it out. But about a week and a half go John and Abby decided to cook and left their dishes in the sink, which is no biggy, but by the 3rd day they were in the sink I confronted John while he was sitting in the kitchen and asked if he was going to clean up the dishes.
    He responded with "well Abby and I have both cleaned up the kitchen by ourselves why don't you."
   I said "well they're not my dishes, why doesn't Abby just wash them"
    He drops in the excuse that she's pregnant and doesn't want her doing a whole lot (which I understand) so I just left it alone. And my ex ended washing the dishes later that day because they had piled up and it was getting annoying.
   Now this isn't the only situation that this has been an issue. But I told my ex that I'll be moving out because I don't feel respected and he says I'm in the wrong. ######

Response: NTA. This sounds more like your roommates are using the pregnancy to avoid doing their fair share of the work. If her husband doesn't want his wife doing chores that's fine but its up to him to pick up that slack ######


Prompt:
So. My siblings and I (2 sisters + 3 brothers + me) decided to go to a Korean bbq place a while ago. One of my sisters, let’s call her Maddie is very proud of her language skills. Idk what that even means. She doesn’t let anyone correct her and gets very upset if someone tells her she’s wrong.

So as soon as we enter the restaurant she greets a waitress with a “konnichiwa”. This waitress is a pro. Doesn’t even look surprised. She greets us in Korean and leads us to a booth.

We all sit down and hope that maddie doesn’t say anything like that again. No such luck. Every time a waiter/waitress approaches our table she greets them with a “Konnichiwa” and says “arigato” when they put down our food. By the 3rd or 4th time even the staff are looking amused.

One of my older brothers, brave soul he is tries to tell Maddie to “maybe cut down on the greetings and thanks” since we are at a *Korean* restaurant- emphasis on Korean. She doesn’t get it.

Enter brave soul sibling number 2: attempts to directly tell her she’s been talking to them in Japanese - gets cut off. None of us try again.

At the end of the meal, we are all trying to hold back laughter. As we are leaving, sister turn around and says “Konbanwa”.

After leaving the restaurant I was the first one to break. I start giggling, then my other sister follows as well. Maddie immediately asks us why we’re laughing. We tell her that she’d been speaking Japanese in a Korean restaurant. She vehemently denies it.

We pull out google translate to prove it to her. Immediate “You could’ve done that while we were eating instead of letting me embarrass myself in front of them”.

Yeah, she didn’t talk much during the drive home. ######

Response: NTA. This sounds like a damned if you do and damned if you don't moment. Your sister was told a number of times that she was wrong but she got annoyed at the interference. Then she got annoyed outside when she realised she messed up. Your input wouldn't have made any difference at all. ######


Prompt:
My dad owns a pizza place that was handed down to him from my grandfather.

I've been working at the pizza place my while life, even part time while I got a business degree.

I found out last early last year that my dad had willed the restaurant to my stepmom. His reasoning being she needs to be taken care of after he dies. And that it would go to me after she died.

I was pissed and "quit" the next day. My dad ended up hiring two people to make up the work I was doing.

Now this is the potential asshole part. A month after I quit, I found a great location where another pizza place had shut down. I bought it and had it up and running in two months. My restaurant is take out only, but my business is doing extremely well.

My dad reached out to me last September and said that his restaurant was losing business because of me and to please come back to the family business. He offered to buy my business so I would get something out of it.

I declined the offer. Now the craziness of 2020 happened and because my restaurant was already setup for takeout, I'm only seeing a 5-10% drop in revenue.

The family restaurant however, is going under.

Now there's a whole lot of arguing about me causing my dad's family to become financially ruined.

AITA? ######

Response: NTA. This sort of thing is exactly why my dad didn't finalize his will until he'd sat down and talked to me and my step mom together and let us come to a decision. He could have just as easily split ownership of the shop until your stepmom died and chose not to and now he's suffering the consequences of his actions. And clearly, his child is better able to run a successful business in the modern world than he and his wife are. ######


Prompt:
This whole argument is really weird to me. Basically, I'm on my period and my boyfriend said offhand he was glad he didn't have to deal with that and said something along the lines of, "I bet you wish you had a dick." To which I responded, "no, not really."

He seemed kind of taken aback by that and pressed the issue of exactly why I did not want to have a dick and I basically told him male genitals seemed really uncomfortable and awkward to possess, like I don't want some meat and a nut sack just chillin in my britches. Hard pass. He got weirdly offended by this and said I was being sexist??? I told him that I observe him scratching his nuts or rearranging his junk multiple times a day and that it would make me crazy if I had to constantly attend to my genitals like that. He got so mad about this to the point he stormed off to let me "think about" why what I said was so upsetting.

I don't get it though? Not 5 minutes earlier he was trashing vaginas and periods, but that's okay, for reasons? Y'all help me out lmao ######

Response:
 NTA. This reeks of the low-key sexist "every woman secretly wishes she were a man" thing. Insecure men really, REALLY care about the fact that they have a dick and somehow it makes them powerful and strong or some shit.

Yes, women may get periods but like...a dangling appendage that just kind of awkwardly hangs there sounds terrible to me lol. ######


Prompt:
I have a good friend from high school that I still hang out with (we are 5 years out from high school). We hang out a decent amount but mainly just to drink and smoke and go to raves together. He’s a really nice guy and a lot of time will smoke me out or gives me rides places without me asking. I’d say we hang out at least a few times a week to smoke some weed or whatever. He had been telling me for a while that since high school I had gotten much better looking especially since I have been working out for a few years and started going to expensive barbers to get better hairstyles. I didn’t think much of it because I was aware that he had a girlfriend. The other day he suggested that I sleep over because we had been drinking quite a bit and it would be unsafe for me  to drive back to my parents house( which was a very good suggestion on his part). I said ok I’ll grab the couch in the living room and you go sleep in your room.  Fast forward to later that night I wake up and this man is grabbing my shoulders completely naked and I freak out saying don’t effin touch me or else I’ll beat you up/call the police. I had told him multiple before when the topic came up that I was not gay at all so I’m unsure why he tried this. He goes back to his room and goes to sleep and ignores me questioning him about what the fuck just happened. I grab my things and drive back to my house and he texts me the next day saying he was blacked out and doesn’t even remember doing anything. I tell him that I don’t think we should hang out anymore because I felt completely repulsed at what had transpired. He tells me that I am being unfair because he had no control over his actions because he was so drunk. Thoughts?

Edit: wanted to clarify I’m a dude not a girl since some of these responses are assuming I’m female sorry didn’t clarify in the post ######

Response: NTA. This really shouldn't even be a question ngl. He has a gf and hitting on you even when he's drunk isn't an excuse for him to do so ######


Prompt:
Alright. So, kids are definitely a far off thing. I’m still under 18 and I don’t personally feel prepared to raise a kid, nor do I think I will be for the next good few years. But today some of my friends were talking about what they want their kids name to be (again just hypothetical future kids, none of my friends are actively pregnant). I chimed in, saying that I’ve always liked the name Laura. One of my fairly close friends asked if I’m really fit to be a mom or if it’d be unfair to the kid. Here’s the thing- I have spina bifida and use a wheelchair. It does impact my life obviously, but I can still do most normal people things.

I removed myself from the conversation to think for a while. I’ve never really thought fully about whether I want kids, but I certainly never thought that it’d be unfair to the kid just because I can’t walk. I PMd my friend asking if she really thought that it’d be unfair after the group chat convo moved on, and she doubled down and said yeah because kids deserve normal parents, and it’s unfair that I would take that away from them. Honestly idk what to think now. I’m a bit upset, but I don’t want to make a scene or anything. And I’ve been thinking about it more and more, and maybe she’s right. ######

Response: NTA. This really hurt me to hear. I’m a social worker for children and adults with disabilities. It’s revolting how discriminatory the system is. Spina Bifida can be genetic, but it’s very unclear at the present. You are not less of a parent because you have a physical disability. It seems your “friends” are uneducated on the subject. ######


Prompt:
My sister been addicted to drugs for about 3 years now, she’s addicted to Heroin and Fentanyl and just start using something called Purple down.

She has down a lot of awful things to get her fixed, like steal money from her family and sell her body, she claims now that she got everything under control which I don’t really believe.

Recently I found out that her soon to be husband doesn’t know that she’s an addict, My sister was acting odd when I brought up the monthly cost of it, she nervously laughed and said “you’re such a weirdo talking about that, are you into drugs now” so when her husband left I asked about it and she confessed that he doesn’t know I got super angry at her and told her she needs to tell him especially when you guys are trying for a baby and she said “I got everything under control so he doesn’t need to know” I got so upset that I left because I knew I couldn’t have at productive conversation at that time

A week later, I called my sister and tried to convince her that she should tell her fiancé about her drug problem and she said “I can’t do that, I will get off them soon” and when I asked her if she was gonna go to rehab she said “no” I then asked if she not going to rehab then how will you get off them and she claimed she was gonna do it by herself

Now I heard her claim she was gonna get off the drugs by herself for 2 years now so at this point I was frustrated and decided to call her fiancé and tell him, he was super upset and hurt that she didn’t tell him sooner but my sister was super Angry at me and threatened to disown me and never let me see my future nieces and nephews

AITA for telling my sister Fiancé ######

Response: NTA. This isn't everyday shit we're talking about. Your sister is addicted to what are literally the two most damaging and addicting drugs. At that point of addiction and delusion (her insisting she's going to get off), you almost can't give her the adult-like respect and independence that you would give to anyone else and not "get into her business". You saved that man's life in a way. Now he at least has the right to decide rather than be blindsided. ######


Prompt:
My friend is dating a guy who is a financial drain on her. He is an “entrepreneur” who can’t choose a practical career for shit.

He has been in 2 MLMs and has been a failed youtuber in the 3 years I’ve known him. Right now he’s in Forex doing terribly. He is in perspective definition, a NEET.

To his credit, he has always had a part time job. But, because he tanks all his money in these “side hustles,” he rarely makes enough to pay rent. In the past year, I think my best friend had to pay his half of the rent at least 3 times, and they live in a fairly pricey city.

The reason I brought this up is because my best friend called me crying and telling me that she thinks that she has to downgrade her apartment because she can’t continue paying his portion of the rent.

I told her she never should have moved in with him, and she needs a boyfriend who is at her financial level. I don’t think a woman who would have a secure and middle class life should be worrying about a man baby, especially since she wants children soon.

She got really offended, but I think she needed to hear it. She told me “never to bring it up again”, but I truly think she’s blind to his faults. AITA? ######

Response: NTA. This isn't about needing someone rich, it's about needing a partner who is responsible and who you can plan for a future with. She needed to hear it. ######


Prompt:
Hi everyone, I know this sounds crazy/cruel but there’s a long story to it -

I’m a transgender female. I was kicked out at the age of 10 because of the way I acted. I was always extremely feminine, wore girls clothing, painted my nails, etc... my parents and my sisters were extremely fed up and completely cut me out of their life. Luckily my grandparents took me in after all of this went down. We would go to family events and I’d see my parents and my sisters and they would literally leave. They’ve never accepted me and to this day I’ve only spoken to one of my sisters once when I saw her at the grocery store a couple years ago. I’m now 24 years old, and my beloved grandmother passed away a couple weeks ago.

She left everything to me in her living trust. I’m honestly shocked and don’t really know what I’m doing but that’s not really what I’m here to talk about. She left me the family house, most of her funds...literally everything. Now I don’t really know how will & testaments work but I went over it with my psychiatrist (yeah I know, not the best person) and she kinda gave me the gist. I’m going to hire a lawyer and get everything sorted out, though. Anyways back to the point. My sisters and my parents reached out demanding to see the living trust. I’ve been ignoring them and I have no idea how they even got my number in the first place but they’re threatening to hire a lawyer, etc. I’m not planning on giving them ANYTHING at all. Am I a bad person for this? Do they deserve anything? I probably am making no sense because I’ve never been left with this much responsibility but yeah. Thanks so much if you’ve read this I just feel like I’m being a horrible person tbh. ######

Response:
 NTA. This is your grandmother's will, not yours. She thought they deserved nothing, whatever they, you or anyone else thinks on the matter is irrelevant. This is her estate and this is what she legally specified has to be done with it.

Personally, I think you need to honour your grandmother's wishes. That means lawyering up, and be prepared if anyone in your family tries to contest the will. But it also means making the right decisions about this inheritance, use it wisely and to make something great of your life. Make your grandmother proud. ######


Prompt:
So to start, this is about periods that wemon have every month so if you dont like hearing about it just leave. Also if you are homophobic/biphobic leave

So im a teenager my periods are painful. The cramps are so bad that I want to curl up into a ball and die. The only way i function on my period is taking meds every 8 hours. My period is also very heavy and it really sucks. Ever since i first got my period me and my mom have talked about birth control because it stops your period. Not so i can mess around with guys. Now my family (my grandma and my aunt) strongly doesnt think i should. Because they belive if i start it now i wont be able to have children of my own, even though i wont because im bi and i like girls more than guys. They call me a brat for not listening to them and say i should listen to the over my mom. I'm siding with my mom and now they refuse to speak to me.  And its making me feel bad for not going with what my family belives in.

So reddit AITA? ######

Response: NTA. This is your decision, and no one else should have an opinion on how you choose to deal with your painful periods. ######


Prompt:
Thieving sister

So my sister (15) has been buying stuff off of our grandmas debit card. I told my mom multiple times to get my grandmas card number change because my sister has the information written down somewhere. She doesn’t change the card, and my sister buys $100 ring as a gift for her girlfriend, which she has shipped to our house. I grabbed the package and told my grandma I’d ship the ring back and get her her money back but my mom and dad just want to let my sister have the ring and pay her back over time... am I the asshole for being pissed at my parents for not taking action on this or am I overreacting? ######

Response: NTA. This is theft and your parents are complicit in it. All three are assholes. Can you assist your grandmother in reporting her card stolen so as to get a new one issued? ######


Prompt:
Preface: I am 27 year old male and i have arthritis in my lumbar spine as well as a bulge in the same area. My only relief is laying down supine on my bed. Every other activity hurts. Walking, sitting, standing, everything. I just finished a year of unsuccessful treatment and being young my doctor said I could be placed on permanent restrictions but not permanent disability.

Main issue:

I'm coming home from picking up my dog from my girlfriends house as she was babysitting. I get home it's like 11:15 pm. There is absolutely no parking and my dad has the driveway because he pays the bills.

I ask my sister and her guests of like 8 people  if anyone is parked directly in front of our house. One guy responds and I ask politely " if you don't mind parking somewhere else I really appreciate it. I have back issues and it would really help me out if I didn't have to walk far."

Then my sister chimes in " I don't give a fuck, he doesn't have to move, if you got a problem with it then take it up with dad".

I disregard her. I repeat myself to her guest a simple " I would greatly appreciate it if you could help me out " he obliged and we switched spots. ( The nearest parking spot was about a little less than quarter of a mile upward. Thanks COVID-19 now you have everyone home there's no parking)  no harm no foul. Now I hear my sister berating me to her guests about " how I'm such a bitch and an asshole and how I'm faking an injury"

Now I'm not sure if this is relevant but I feel I should mention that our mother passed away unexpectedly on June 29th, 2020 and idk if I should just chalk it up to my sister still being hurt from our mom's passing.

I just believe that since I live here, and given my back problem i was okay in asking him to switch spots with me.

Was I the asshole for doing so? ######

Response: NTA. This is the most clear cut case of NTA in recent memory, and high on the all-time list. ######


Prompt:
So the way I make toast when I make a full breakfast is a bit weird. I toast it twice on the lowest setting so it's fresh and warm when I've finished with the fry pan. It's just easier to time things that way, and it's how I like to cook.

My SO doesn't understand why I do this, and wants me to change it back to his preferred setting when I'm done, so he doesn't accidentally come up with slightly toasted bread instead of brown.

I maintain that he's a big boy and can change the setting just like I do when I go to use it.

His arguments are that it's weird how I do my toast (he's repeatedly asked me to re-explain because he just doesn't get it) , and when I change the setting its like "putting the kettle setting on 50 degrees and not changing it back".

I feel like this disagreement is so stupid and I have no need to explain why I like to cook the way I do, but it keeps coming up so I'm honestly wondering if I'm going crazy or really being THAT inconsiderate. AITA? ######

Response: NTA. This is such a non-issue. It doesn't matter if how you make your toast is weird or he doesn't understand it. If everyone just checks the toaster before using it, everything will be ok. (Even if you each end up with suboptimal toast from time to time because you forgot to check.) ######


Prompt: So i was spending time with my mom today and my best friend decided to call me. i had headphones on luckily so i picked up and she seemed somewhat off during the conversation. while talking to her she kept moaning and sighing more and more often and said her boyfriend was fingering her while i was on the call. she then abruptly hung up and i felt so uncomfortable and violated that i didn't really know what to do. i texted her saying it made me uncomfortable and she said "my boyfriend made me do it" and she was sorry. so i texted her boyfriend and let him know that the call made me feel weird and uncomfortable and that i didnt find it funny at all. he replied and said "well i found it hilarious" with an unnecessary picture of my friend in nothing but her underwear. i was disgusted with him and carried on with my day but was still appalled by their choice to call me. she called me a few hours later profusely apologizing and taking accountability for what they did, which i appreciated but i discovered that her boyfriend took her phone and called me specifically and put me on speakerphone while he was fingering her and the phone was out of her control. she defended his action and told me he was sorry but i told her that if he was sorry then i could hear it from his own voice. i am still upset with them  both for her defending her boyfriend's action by saying "i think he's sorry and he was just trying to be kinky" and him for calling me in the first place and not taking accountability for his own actions. AITA for still being upset? ######

Response:
 NTA. This is sexual harassment. They included you in their kink without consent.

In fact, I’m a bit worried about your friend. It reads as if she did not consent to him calling you on her phone nor did she consent to him sending the picture of her. Is she comfortable herself in this relationship? I would keep a close eye on how he treats her otherwise. ######


Prompt:
My nephew is a great kid. He’s 17 and he loves a lot of nerdy things, he’s always loved Transformers and I took him to see every movie, and I watched every show with him (including the originals from the 80s) since I babysat him a lot.

I am a collector. I have hundreds of figures and toys from Transformers, anime, games, etc.

My sister and her husband are very strict, very anti anything that’s not related to making money or working. Their kid’s not like that at all. He works hard in school and has a job, but he likes to have hobbies and do things he loves.

It’s was his birthday and I decided to gift him a rare figure that you can’t get anymore and is worth a fuck ton of money. He’s always loved that particular figure, and he was so happy to receive it that he cried. He decided then that he wanted to start his own Transformers collection and he ordered all the parts to Devastator and all his favorites with his own money. (I did buy him one more though, kid deserves it)

My sister is furious because she says I’m teaching him to be lazy and waste his money on useless shit. I got angry and told her that if it makes you happy, it’s not useless, and that she needs to show a little interest in her son beyond his grades and income because he’s told me that he feels like he’s unloved unless he’s her little robot.

AITA? ######

Response: NTA. This is ridiculous and he is 17, not 7, nor was it inappropriate. But either way, he will be out of the house in like a year. Spoil him with Transformers then since he will be an adult and they cannot do anything about it. ######


Prompt:
Okay, this is kind of of a weird one. I have been dating my girlfriend for 7 months now. I want to preface all of this by saying that I love her and that this post makes her sound worse than she is. She is one of the most genuine, sweetest, and hardworking people I have ever met. But, this whole situation has been so off putting to me and I don’t know what to do about it.

My girlfriend can be a bit clingy in general which, frankly, I have always found a bit cute. But, when she goes to the bathroom she always wants me to join her. At first I thought it was cute she wanted to spend time with me so much but I didn’t realize it was something she was going to expect every time. It started as just sitting on the side of the tub while she peed. Which could be inconvenient depending on if I was in the middle of something but I didn’t mind too much. But, starting a few months ago she started going number two and also dealing with her period stuff in front of me too. I’ve tried to excuse myself because the sights and smells. But, it hurts her feeling when I do and it always ends up in a fight about something unrelated. So, I’ve been dealing with it to keep the peace. She doesn’t mind if I go on my phone or do something else in the bathroom. But, even so, I just don’t want to witness/smell/hear those moments and it’s starting to impact my attraction towards her. I’ve tried talking with her but it seems to be really important to her for whatever reason. WIBTA if I stopped doing this? ######

Response: NTA. This is really one for a therapist, and I mean that quite seriously. She needs to be able to go to the bathroom alone. ######


Prompt:
Throwaway

I am a 16 year old male boy and I have a mother. Anyway my mother is one of those parents who is great with the community. Anyway a few days ago my mother adopted a  15 year old girl and a 10 year old boy who are Billings. She made me give up my room I stayed for 14 years to the girl and made me share in a smaller room with the 10 year old boy.

Anyway the 15 year old girl constantly makes fun of me and the 10 year old boy brakes my things and I don't give him permission to touch my property. I told my mom either give me back my old room or make the 10 year old and 15 year old kids share or make a brand new room for one of them or I am living permanently for the rest of my life at my dads house who lives in a way better neighborhood.

I also told my mom if she wants me to visit her she is going to have to actually parent these adopted kids other wise she is going to be stuck with problem children. My mother yelled at me for not considering them as a family and telling them that the reason they are problem children is because they had a tough life and that I am not accepting them as family. My mother also told me that I am the problem child because I have no empathy for these kids.

She said that the 15 year old girl needs more privacy than boys and that I can just man up. Mother told me that I can just man up and live here. I told her that I am heading to my dad and I am not going to have a relationship with her anymore and that she can love her adopted children I told her I need my own room as much as the 15 year old girl. My mother yelled at me and told me to get lost. I am at my dads house now. My dad is very furious at my mom. I might have been mean about the adopted kids and that I might have been rude to my mom but those kids break my things and bully me so I don't want to live with them aita ######

Response:
 NTA. This is NOT how you introduce adoptive siblings. She didn't even ask how you would feel and then put you out of your childhood bedroom... If she at least just moved the boy into your room it would make more sense. But what she's doing is making you resent these kids for HER actions. She should have taken parenting and introductory classes before adopting these kids, and if she did she isn't putting any effort into using the tools she was given.

INFO: Did you know about the adoptions before you met the kids? I'm just curious. ######


Prompt:
I've recently been having some dental problems like pain and black spots on my gums and teeth pain, it's been going on for a few months and I've brought it up with my parents and asked if I could go to a dentist. They've repeatedly pushed it back saying I'll be alright in some time, but when I do bring it back it up they say the same thing as if I haven't told them before.

I understand that dentists are expensive (where I live), and I'm not covered under health insurance either (since we're not citizens). I get that seeing a dentist can become very expensive but these pains have really been starting to get worse and I'm asking for dentists more and more. Would I be the asshole if I just told my parents to just take me to a dentist already?

For context, we are by no means poor, but my parents did grow up in a country without many dentists so they were raised with the belief that dental problems aren't that big of a deal and that it'll resolve itself. ######

Response: NTA. This is literally medical abuse, OP. Health problems, especially dental problems, don’t tend to go away on their own and delaying treatment will only make it worse. If they don’t agree, book yourself in and tell the dentist to bill your parents. Your health should come first. ######


Prompt:
I live in a condo type house so there are 2 separate apartments in one building. I (F23) live alone and the person in the other apartment is a man with multiple sclerosis.

Our paths rarely cross because I work 8 - 5 and he doesn't appear to leave his house very often; however, I was home one day back in October and he knocked on my door. He asked if I could drive him to the bank to get cash and then to pay rent. Even though I felt slightly uncomfortable, I also felt guilty because he needed help. So I did.

Since then, every month he has asked me for help and every time I was genuinely busy and unable to help him. I told him that I work all day and travel on the weekends so he should find another arrangement. However, he started knocking on my door more frequently and although I feel like an ass, I started ignoring them.

Presently, I'm staying inside and working from home. On Monday, he knocked on my door and I told him that I'm limiting my interactions with people. On Thursday, he knocked again and I was on the phone with my mom so I opened it and said "I'm busy right now, do you need anything?" but he turned around and walked away. He knocked again Friday night, which I ignored and he has knocked 3 times today.

I feel like an asshole for ignoring him and not wanting to help him but he has done some other stuff that makes me uncomfortable. I want to be left alone but he either doesn't understand or is overlooking my requests. AITA for ignoring him? ######

Response: NTA. this is kinda weird, you told him you're not really a viable option for helping and he keeps knocking. ######


Prompt: Today is my (24) birthday, I just got done with work and was watching tv when my girlfriend of 4 years came in the room to tell me she made my favorite kind of pie. She then asked me if I would rather kiss her for $100 dollars or kiss the hottest girl I know for $700. Not thinking much about it I said I would kiss her for $100. She got upset that I didn’t say she was the hottest girl I knew. She stormed off to our room and won’t talk to me. To me it seems like a trick question and I don’t get why she is so mad. AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA. This is just a silly trend in Twitter. I asked my bf the same (kiss me: 100 dollars or hottest girl: 1 mill) and he said he’d kissed the hottest girl once and we’d have our life solved.

I think she overreacted a bit. ######


Prompt:
Background: me (f22) and my fiancé (m23) are getting married in a couple of days and we had a move in scheduled for tomorrow, we already had a moving van scheduled and our bed and sofa delivery timed to come before our wedding so we can sort out the house out and move in on our wedding day.

I received a suspicious email this morning saying our tenancy agreement has been voided, I called up and asked why and they said it was a error. They later called me ten mins later and informed me that we can’t collect the keys tomorrow , she told me straight that the flooring is undone the toilet hasn’t been fitted and the inspector said that the sink is in the middle of the kitchen floor.

When they  told me that it clicked as to why they voided our contract, I’m a law student so I know they have breached their contract as they are unable to fulfill their promise, I told them they was trying to save their ass by deleting our contract off the server and they are in fact legally liable to reimburse us for the expenses we have incurred (moving van and furniture delivery), she told me there is a property available immediately on a different development however the rent is more expensive.

I got a pretty good grade in my contract law exam so when she told me they aren’t liable to reimburse me I told them they’re liable to my partner since he signed it the fact I didn’t doesn’t exclude the fact they are contractually liable to my fiancé. Also if they can’t honour our contract they need to give us the slightly more expensive property for the same price we agreed to our initial one.

Anyways they point blank said no and they will get the property ready for next week.  I said if they don’t get it ready for by Monday latest I will sue them and I know I have solid ground? AITA for throwing the book at them and threatening. This is the 2nd time they’ve pushed back out move date. ######

Response: NTA. This is hurting you financially. Take them to court. ######


Prompt:
My sister has this personality. If she is happy, everyone’s happy -maybe a bit annoyed, because she yells a lot- but if she’s anxious, then she makes sure everyone’s anxious. We’ve told her multiple times to stop making her problems the whole family’s problems but she won’t listen and will just keep doing it.

Today my mum cooked an organic burger, which is unusual. These burgers are tastier and better than regular ones (in my opinion) and I was very happy to be able to eat one pacefully. But my sister stomped downstairs and started complaining about how much homework she had. I did not want her to keep me from enjoying the burger, so I said to her:

“Can you stop taking about your homework while we’re having dinner? You’re always talking about your homework and it’s very annoying”

“Don’t listen if you don’t like it”

I was very annoyed by her answer. She was fully aware that she was annoying me -and everyone in the family- and still wouldn’t just shut up.

I got up, took my plate and my glass and sat down on the living room’s table to enjoy my burger, which by the way tasted delicious.

When I went back to the kitchen to put the plate in the dishwasher and everything, she gave me a death stare. It almost felt like she was trying to guilt trip me for not standing her raging complaints. She’s now upset with me and will talk to me as if I was a POS.

Honestly, I am very tired of her attitude. I cannot fully figure out wheter I am being the asshole or not. She’s always putting us in a bad mood and is not willing to stop her selfish bratty attitude. ######

Response: NTA. This is hard believe for some people like her want to rant in during dinner to let meal get cold or what?  But it look like she try pushing her own problem to blame on them like you.. Good for you want to have peaceful dinner. ######


Prompt:
We have a friend who came out openly as a lesbian two years ago (we're all 15 y/o now) and ever since the beginning of the last school semester, she's been touching me.

She was always hugging me from behind, or pinching my butt, or squeezing my breasts. At first it didn't bother me because my friends and I all playfully do this to each other, but then I started to notice that she was doing it more frequently to me than them.

Whenever we sat down, she always found some way to sit next to me, and always found some way to put her hand on my knee.

Our group likes to do "air kisses" - where you kiss the air on each side of someone's cheek - but more than once, she has "accidentally" kissed my actual cheek. But she never "accidentally" kisses any of our other friend's cheeks...

Right before they canceled school, she made a beaded bracelet for everyone in our friend group, but mine and hers were the only ones with hearts on it.

I'm too afraid to tell any of my other friends what she is doing to me because I don't want them to think I'm homophobic. COVID has been a safe haven for me because it gave me an excuse to avoid her for many months.

But we're all supposed to hang out tomorrow and I don't know if I can keep doing this. She's touched me so much that even as I write this I can think forward to tomorrow and already feel her touching me again.

Will I be the asshole if I tell her to stop?

TL;Dr I have a lesbian friend who touched me so mucb that I want to tell her to stop touching me, but our group is a very touchy-feely group and I don't want my friends to accuse me of being homophobic. ######

Response:
 NTA. This is getting to the point where you need to tell her she's making you uncomfortable because she's targeting you more than others.

Also let her sit down first so you can avoid sitting next to her for a while.

If your friends accuse you of being homophobic just explain what's been going on. ######


Prompt:
So, my daughter's Father owes a ton of back child support. Part of the outstanding balance is taken from his paychecks along with each current payment. It's not enough to pay it all back before she's 18, but it is deducted nevertheless. Anyway, he got a letter in the mail from the US Treasury Dept telling him that they've intercepted his $1200 corona stimulus check, and it will be applied to the back child support he owes. He almost immediately contacted me to tell me about the letter and how he was counting on that money. He was very upset that they would do that to him in a "it's not fair" kind of tone. I gathered that he believes that the money that is already garnished from his paychecks should have been enough to avoid additional consequences for being a former "deadbeat" Had he been keeping up with the stimulus check news then he would have known that this was going to happen. They announced that back child support debtors would not get checks a while ago. To his credit, he has been a consistent father in our daughter's life since the Attorney General's office caught up with him several years back and garnished his wages. And we have been on civil coparenting terms with few issues. But now, he has projected his frustration and bind onto me because he had already spent the stimulus money in his head that he isn't getting. I know this pandemic has hit people in the pockets, but he has not mentioned being in a bad financial situation since he is still able to work these days. I don't know what he planned on using the money for, and I don't ever ask him for extra money whenever I'm in a tight spot. AITA if I decline handing it over to him when I get it??

Le sigh... ######

Response: NTA. This is for your kid, not you. He shouldn't of been a deadbeat and this wouldn't have been an issue. ######


Prompt:
So a bit of context.
I’ve been begging my husband to let me buy a car since he’s been driving me literally everywhere for over 2 years because he doesn’t want to spend money on a car or insurance. He ended up telling me no again because we need to continue putting money into our savings. I got pretty upset seeing as we have $16000 in our savings already and I just want a used car to drive myself to work.
He saw how upset I was and decided to build me my own computer so we could play video games together. I told him once a while ago that I really don’t want a computer and would rather put the $1000 towards a car. But then he started showing me different video games and won’t stop talking about it and I don’t have the heart to tell him I actually have no interest in playing any video games since they kind of bore me. Now it’s annoying the hell out of me because he’s asking me what kind of mouse and keyboard I want and complains when I tell him “I like how this one looks” because “that’s a shitty one” “that’s not a gaming keyboard” and I sort of lost it and yelled and told him “buy me whatever, I really don’t care about this at all!” And he said it hurt his feelings so I apologized and kind of lied and told him how excited I am to have a computer. Not only that but he decided to spend another $100 on wood and materials to build our computer desk. We also need to buy another chair and headset for me. At this point, I feel like if I tell him that not only do I not care about video games, but that this is all a huge waste of money to me, he would be extremely upset and I really don’t want to hurt his feelings. Should I just try to get into video games for him or should I tell him the truth? ######

Response: NTA. This is financial abuse, you should buy what you want especially when you decent savings for a uesd car. You dont need permission. And your husnand makes a computer WTF. I suspect he will say its a gift for u but will use it way more than you. ######


Prompt:
For context, I'm sixteen and my brother is eight and autistic.

My brother is developing an infection on his leg that's getting worse every day. Just three months ago, I had to do a major surgery on both legs for this exact infection - MRSA - and almost had to amputate. I can tell that my brother is developing the same thing, but my parents are refusing to take him to the hospital and insist on using various creams on the spot that aren't prescribed and don't seem to be helping.

I've asked both my parents to please take him to the hospital, because I struggled so much with my own surgery and Im hoping if we take him now, we won't have to operate on his legs. However, my mom is insistent that it's no big deal (she insisted this last time when it happened to me too, which is why my legs got so bad before I was taken to emergency). My dad just complains about how my mom would yell if he took him to the hospital and we've argued about this but he won't budge.

I want to take my brother to the hospital, maybe early in the morning before my parents wake up. I can cover the Healthcare costs with the money I've earned tutoring and all the money I've saved all my life from birthdays and holidays. Granted, I can't sign consent forms for him as I'm not an adult yet, but that's only if he needs surgery and I don't think he does yet, though he will if it goes untreated for a week. ######

Response: NTA. This is called medical neglect. He needs urgent treatment immediately. ######


Prompt:
I’m 15f. My mom is 35f. Before the pandemic started, my mom’s friend and her two kids (friend is 36f, kids are 12f and 14f) came to stay with us, and are still here.

The friend’s kids are annoying, which I can deal with, it’s not an issue. But they’re also using my hygienic things, like my razor, my special soaps/hair products that I bought for my hair and put my name on. They’ve also been drinking after me. And they got into my prescribed pain killers that I got last week, my iron supplements, my last pack of birth control, and the stash of snacks I keep in my false bottom drawer in my room. They are also harassing my cat and tearing tufts of his fur out. I told my mom about this, she didn’t seem to care.

My mom’s friend, their mom, has also been an issue. She’s been smoking weed in the basement, which wouldn’t be an issue except she smokes enough of it to cause the entire house to smell like it, and causes me not to be able to breathe. Mom’s friend goes out partying, gets drunk, and hangs out with my mom in her room pretty much 24/7. I’ve been sick and unable to keep food down this week, and I’ve been ignored by my mom because she’s hanging out with her friend. Mom’s friend is also helping her kids in eating pretty much everything in the fridge before I get a chance to get to it.

I told my mom we needed to have a serious talk yesterday, and made her sit down and talk to me. I told her what her friend’s kids were doing, and then I straight up told her that her friend was causing my legitimate distress because apparently her presence was enough to make my mom stop acknowledging my existence. My mom told me that I didn’t need to have this conversation with her, and that I was being a rude spoiled brat. She’s gone back to ignoring me, and I am still sick. AITA for telling my mom our guests are causing me problems? ######

Response: NTA. This is all gross at the least (the razor) and DANGEROUS at most (the pills!!!!!!???). Both parents are unfit, it seems, and why the hell is the friend going out and partying during a fucking pandemic? ######


Prompt:
My son is 10, 1 year ago he asked for a pet Guinea pig.
We have a large garden so I agreed but only with some terms.

I would cover the upkeep of food, bedding and pig treats and toys.

He would have to save up half the money for a large hutch and I would pay for a large outdoor run,  he agreed and did his chores and for his birthday I paid for 2 Guinea pigs from a local farm seller.

My son named the guinea pigs pudding and candy.
Within days of buying them my son lost interest, he refused to feed them, refused to clean them and refused to move their run around the garden so they were on fresh grass.

I warned him multiple times that I would take possession of the pigs as my own, I discussed with my husband before we got them that I would quite enjoy having them in the garden as I had Guinea pigs growing up and always adored them.

So after a few months of doing 100% of the work myself I renamed the guinea pigs geralt and roach.

When my son was in the garden playing he heard me calling them to get them in the pen.
( I move them from the outdoor run and pen to the indoor shed pen at night)
He threw an absolutely huge tantrum and demanded o change the names back.

I said if he began looking after them like he was supposed to that he could change the names back.

He continued to sulk and moan  but eventually agreed to these terms.

It's been a week since that tantrum and he hasn't been near them since, he sulks every day about the names but refuses to help.

my husband has told me to just change the names back and let it go, but I prefer those names and seeing as I'm doing all the work and I see them as my pets now not mu sons why shouldn't I?

I will gladly re think this situation if I am wrong or missing the point but I just don't think my husbands point Is very fair,  my son needs more discipline already as he seems to be so demanding and sulky lately AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA. This is actually the most responsible and reasonable reaction I've seen to the classic issue of a kid not caring for the pet he begged for. I'm so glad that you made sure that you would be happy having the guinea pigs yourself before you got them! Thank you so, so, so much for not giving away the piggers to "teach him a lesson" - such a common and awful response.

I think this is perfect. The piggies are happy, you are happy, and your son is getting a mild but clearly felt reminder that if you don't care for your pet, it's not really your pet. Totally appropriate, and his lack of work and presence of tantrums isn't a sign that this is unreasonable. It's a sign that he is a kid, and he's trying to find an easy way out where he gets to call them his but doesn't do the work.

Hold the line. Be patient and calm and explain that he really needs to do the work if he wants them to be his, not for your sake but for theirs. Being a pet owner isn't about a possession; it's about a relationship,  and that needs to happen every day. ######


Prompt:
I live in a 4 bedroom apartment with 3 other guys. I haven’t had any issues with any of them up until now when the roommate on my side started dating this girl and she basically moved. This doesn’t particularly bother me but her kid is living here now. He didn’t ask any of us if this was okay (obviously I would’ve said hell no regardless). Kids are, by nature, noisy. She’s like 6, so she’s gonna play and be a kid. However, I didn’t sign up to live with a kid.

I was going to talk to him about it and let him know that it wasn’t cool that the kid lives here. But I think I’m just going to report it to the leasing office. He didn’t give us the decency of asking, so I figure why should I?

For God sakes, he doesn’t know any of us that well and they leave her to sleep in the living room (our common space) and all of her stuff is out there. I would be worried for my kids safety and be super uncomfortable with that - you never know what kind of people you’re around.

Am I the asshole here if I report him? ######

Response:
 NTA. This is a safeguarding issue if nothing else.

As you say, they don’t know any of you well enough. ######


Prompt:
To start with, I am not rich in the sense I have a mansion and luxury cars. But with the combined income of myself and my fiancé, we live comfortably. We don’t live extravagantly, we save a lot and are able to afford nice things like a few holidays a year. If we have an unexpected expense like our car breaks down, we can easily afford to fix it.

In contrast, most of my siblings are in low income jobs. My younger sister and her husband are on minimum wage jobs, to the point they don’t qualify to pay tax on their income (we’re in the UK). My older sister and brother are better off but not by much. If they had an unexpected expense, it would be difficult for them to pay straight away. In theory we could survive on one salary if myself or my fiancé stopped working, this is definitely not the case for my siblings. But no one is hand to mouth, or super poor.

whenever I have any problems, they always dismiss it because “i can afford it”. For example, my work is cutting salaries in response to the coronavirus (we could take a voluntary paycut but it was implied if we didn’t, whole jobs would be cut). Obviously no one wants to be in this position, but their response was “you can afford to not work” or “it would be so much worse if it was happening to me”. Which, ok, that’s true but that’s not what is happening here. We need to get the rendering on our house re-done, I was asking for their opinion on what my options were, and it’s always “it doesn’t matter, you can afford it”. And I’m supposed to get married later this year but who knows if that’ll happen, and they just brush me off that I can afford to get married later.

Am I being insensitive? I don’t want to come across as a brat... but it’s hard when I want to talk about a problem I’m having and all I get in response is basically, shut up you’re too privileged to have problems. And I also don’t think having money is a solution to everything. But then that’s very easy for someone with money to say. ######

Response: NTA. This is a really bad mindset for anyone to have and it can make people feel like their problems don't matter. Don't listen to them. You're not a brat and it's fine to be upset about things that may not seem huge to other people. Having money is definitely not a solution to everything, btw. ######


Prompt:
My brother(single dad) and I live next to each other. He is still working outside of the home but I am not so his daughter has been hanging out with us while he’s gone. She is 13 so she can be home alone but obviously a 13yo home alone for 40+ hours a week isn’t the best idea.

Anyway, I have a 5 year old that recently got an easy bake oven that we struggled to use. She made a few “desserts” that didn’t turn out. We only had one packet of cake mix left and 13yo niece offered to help 5yo make it.

Suddenly I have a crying 5yo on my hands because she and Niece were  able to make the cake...and Niece ate the whole thing. 5yo didn’t get a single bite and now we have no more mixes left.

I thought it was very rude so I sent Niece home for the day. And told her she could come back tomorrow IF she apologizes to 5yo. She gave a half assed apology but defended her actions by saying she made it so she get a to eat it and went home.

Today she came back over and I told her that I wanted a real apology and for her to realize what she did was mean. She got huffy and went back home.

I get a text from my brother asking why Niece is home crying saying I banned her from ever coming back over. I explained the situation and he reponded “omg this is so petty, why are you manufacturing drama between kids?”

AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA. This is a lesson on sharing. This isn’t manufactured drama it’s life. Your niece has to learn some social skills. At 13 years old, she should know the difference between right and wrong. But, I would allow her to come over and ban her from the easy bake oven.

Pro tip: Since you are out of mixes, you can go online and get a recipe to make more just google “easy bake oven homemade mixes. “ ######


Prompt:
My brother(single dad) and I live next to each other. He is still working outside of the home but I am not so his daughter has been hanging out with us while he’s gone. She is 13 so she can be home alone but obviously a 13yo home alone for 40+ hours a week isn’t the best idea.

Anyway, I have a 5 year old that recently got an easy bake oven that we struggled to use. She made a few “desserts” that didn’t turn out. We only had one packet of cake mix left and 13yo niece offered to help 5yo make it.

Suddenly I have a crying 5yo on my hands because she and Niece were  able to make the cake...and Niece ate the whole thing. 5yo didn’t get a single bite and now we have no more mixes left.

I thought it was very rude so I sent Niece home for the day. And told her she could come back tomorrow IF she apologizes to 5yo. She gave a half assed apology but defended her actions by saying she made it so she get a to eat it and went home.

Today she came back over and I told her that I wanted a real apology and for her to realize what she did was mean. She got huffy and went back home.

I get a text from my brother asking why Niece is home crying saying I banned her from ever coming back over. I explained the situation and he reponded “omg this is so petty, why are you manufacturing drama between kids?”

AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA. This is a learning moment. The 13 year old will either learn to share, or that all she has to do is go crying to Daddy to get her way.

Your daughter is also having a learning moment. She understands that what happened was unfair, now is Mum gonna stand up for her, or is Mum gonna sweep it under the rug? ######


Prompt:
My friend Alicja was pissed drunk the other night, to the point she was sleeping on the street and I tried calling her a taxi to get her home while ensuring she wasn't choking on her vomit and nobody would do anything to her. 2 taxis straight up refused to take her becuase she's drunk and the last taxi said they would only if i was in the taxi with her, holding her to ensure she vomited in a barf bag and not all over the taxi. I spent like 50 zloty, on the taxi ride (that's a lot in Poland) and I take her to her apartment, no elevator so i have to walk her up 7 flights of stairs.

When we fianlly get in her place, I get her to drink some water and I hold her hair back as she throws up in the toilet. Her flatmate gets woken up and tells me to leave, to which i refuse and I tell her Alicja said i can spend the night here and I have no money left in my wallet to get a taxi and I can't walk back either becuase my phone is dead (google maps was needed, unfamiliar area). They unfotunately didn't have an Iphone charger. Her flatmate is telling me to leave and I tell her to shut the fuck up becuase I'm trying to take care of Alicja and I have nowhere else to go. her flatmate can't force me to leave from Alicja's room becuase htey rent different rooms, jsut shair a common bathroom and kitchen.

The flatmate kept saying she feels uncomfortable with boys in her presence and she doesn't want me nearby and I told her to shut hte fuck up and go back to bed, Alicja drank like a liter of Vodka and I spent 3 hours and 50 zloty getting her there, I have no energy or money to get home and i don't care what her flatmate says.

A bunch of my friends are pissed becuase they are also friends with the flatmate and are saying i made her feel "uncomfortable" and i shoul'dve not stayed to which i say fuck that i don't give a shit i have no interest at all of being involved with the flatmate and i left the house at 8 am. ######

Response:
 NTA. This had me torn for a minute, but putting myself in your shoes, I would be in such a terrible mood if I had to spend all my money dragging my friend home because she over did it, cleaning up her vomit, all to have her roommate immediately tell me to gtfo while I’m still helping the drunk friend. Could you have responded to her in a better, nicer way? Yeah probably, but not after everything else you put up with that night.

You’re NTA and you’re a great friend for doing all that. ######


Prompt:
So when my wife and I got married I was probably 40 pounds overweight. I gained weight for a couple years until I finally got sick of being a fatass and started exercising and dieting. Since then I’ve lost 50 pounds, and I’d say I’m within a healthy weight range now.

When I first married my wife I would say looks wise I was out of her league. I think she’s very pretty and I was definitely not good looking. I’d say now we’re more equal as physical attractiveness goes, not to be a brag.

Anyway I was talking to a friend about how I’d finally lost weight and it felt good, he congratulated me then said that I should upgrade my wife. I figured it was a joke and chuckled a little but he kept going with it, said that we’ve only been married a few years(4, not nothing) and that I shouldn’t spend the rest of my life with someone “ugly” that I married because I was fat.

I said yes, I do in fact want to spend the rest of my life with someone I married, that tends to be how it works, and that I’m not a piece of shit so I’m not going to upgrade my wife.

He got a divorce a few years ago and talked a bit about how good it felt to be out there again, but never really said it was because he thought she was ugly.

He got pissed and said that he divorced his wife for looks and he isn’t a piece of shit, at which point I said that I disagreed, and he hung up. He messaged me later that we exchanged some “harsh words” and should just move past it, but then followed it up with he wants an apology.

I don’t know what the fucks wrong with him, but a mutual friend also messaged me that calling him a piece of shit wasn’t “cool”. I don’t know I’m pissed off right now so it’s hard to tell if I went too far.

AITA? ######

Response: NTA. This guy is a major asshole and what he suggested was disgusting. Same goes for anyone who defends his behavior. ######


Prompt:
My husband(38M) and I(37F) have been married 17 years. We have two children, 18M and 13F. Every few years my husband gets what I lovingly call baby fever and wants to have another child. I usually respond with "the baby factory is closed" and he drops it. It tends to only happen more when friends, family, or coworkers have babies so I didn't really take his requests to seriously.

Last year he told me he wants to have another kid but unlike the other times, he hasn't let it go. It is really putting a strain on our marriage. To him there is no reason to not have another child. We are in a better state financially than we were with the first two and have better insurance. We also own our home. Why not have another?

To me, it's another 10 months of misery. My first two pregnancies were really rough on me physically and mentally and I was in my early 20s then. I can't imagine how much harder it would be now that I'm pushing 40. Then there is the months/years of diapers, breastfeeding, sleepless nights, etc. My husband is a good father but 90% of all child care from birth to about 5 years was my responsibility.

I am firmly against having another child. My husband thinks it is unfair that I keep saying no and there is nothing he can do about it.

AITA for telling my husband no to having another child? ######

Response: NTA. This guy is a human skin suit stuffed with red flags. Please keep us updated and don’t give in! ######


Prompt:
Throwaway because my parents browse this sub

So today my father set a challenge for me and my mother.

Who ever completed the 5km loop around our house would get anything they wanted( as long as said item was under 100 euros)

So I can do 5k in 27 minutes while it takes my mother 40 ish minutes so I was sure I was gonna win.but my mother has a habit of letting me run off, then calling one of her friends to bring her home after about 1km, so it seems like she is this super fit "model", while she makes me look like a fat lazy bastard.

So we set off and I tailgate my mother so she cant cheat and I tail her for about 4km and then i sprint the last 1km and win, but my mother was fucking furious, she went off at me saying I "belittled her and made her look unfit" and is demanding that my dad gets her a present because "it's not fair to get your son something and not your wife"

So reddit, aita for tailgating my mother? ######

Response: NTA. This goddamn post is riddled with typos. Every time it says "mother" or "mom" it should say "toddler".  Please fix this. ######


Prompt: Yeah so my friend had exposure at work and she got tested, alright that’s the reality of life now. Fast forward 10 says later, still no test results. Well i find out a couple Tuesday’s ago that her results were actually positive- she found out on a Monday- and doesn’t  bother to tell me despite being around me and others. Her husband actually spilled the beans. I was around her during this time and my husband was leaving a couple days later to visit family, namely his Mother who is immune compromised due to chemo. I was a little upset and all I texted was “you do know you can still spread it and don’t you think you should have told me?” Her response “well I feel fine.” I did not respond further. I found out a few days later she tells a mutual friend how I “hurt her feelings.” I’m just floored at how selfish this seems and tbh it’s affecting my friendship with her because I feel her behavior is disturbing. I’m not trying to be overly dramatic but like most everyone, I have a job, a family and don’t want to get sick and infect others or miss work or God forbid face hospitalization. But now she’s pretty cold towards me. Did I handle this wrong? ######

Response:
 NTA. This disease kills people and gives others life long injuries/effects. Not just old or sick people.
Let her ignore you. That is not the sort of person you want in your life. She doesn't care about your safety, your husband's safety or anyone elses. ######


Prompt: My husband (28M) and I (26F) have been talking about his interest in music and movies and he admits that he think men are better/more interesting in movies and in music. They’re better writers, singers, musicians, etc. He doesn’t think women are incapable of being just as good as men or better, he just says he hasn’t found any female artists that impress him as much as men do. Which is upsetting enough I guess. But he also says the few female artists he does like, he won’t play when I’m around because he doesn’t want me to start playing more female artists all the time since he doesn’t like a majority of them. So obviously I’m pissed. I feel like he’s just manipulating when me he does that. Who’s the asshole here? ######

Response: NTA. Thinking men are inherently better at something than women is sexist, yes. And it sounds like he lets the gender of the artist influence his opinion more than the music. ######


Prompt:
So a little bit of context; I (14M) live in NYC and have 2 siblings: my sister (23F) and my brother (8M).  We live in a brownstone where my parents have the biggest bedroom, I have the second largest, my brother has the third largest, and the other 2 bedrooms function as guest bedrooms.  My sister lives in a college dorm, and only spends breaks at home.

So until my sister went to college she lived in the second biggest bedroom (where I currently stay in), I stayed in the third largest (where my little brother currently lives in), etc.  However, once she went to college we all 'moved up a bedroom'' I guess, and now when she visits she usually stays in one of the guest bedrooms.  One thing to note is that my bedroom is quite a bit bigger than the guest room.

Until now there's never been a problem with that arrangement.  Recently though my sister had to come home due to current events, and it looks like she's going to stay until summer break ends.  In light of this she wants her old bedroom back.

My parents agree with her, and say since she's "older" she should have more space, and I ought to be more understanding and whatnot.

I absolutely refuse.  All my stuff are in this room, I've stayed here for the past 5 years, and frankly, IDGAF that this was originally her bedroom.  However, my parents are basically making me, and in reality there's not much I can do about it.  So reddit, for my peace of mind, AITA for not wanting to give up my bedroom for my older sister? ######

Response: NTA. They’re complete jerks for doing that to you when she’s going to leave again anyway. Are they going to kick your little brother out of his room because you’re older and need more room?! ######