Prompt:
Kind of a long post but bear with me.

Yesterday, my husband's side of the family wanted to celebrate Mother's Day since it was a nice day out and tomorrow (actual holiday) is supposed to rain pretty badly.

Every year since husband and I have been married, we've done a joint Mother's Day: an outdoor barbecue at his parent's house.

Because of the "lockdown", I already wasn't thrilled about the idea of going out, but husband persuaded me saying "it will be less than ten people, so it's fine." I do love him and get along with most of his family, so I agreed. Now, here's the thing. His mother is an absolute Karen and has never liked me. My own mom passed away only a couple months ago due to lung cancer and this will be the first Mother's Day without her. With this on my mind, I wasn't looking forward to celebrating the holiday, but I toughed it out and went to the barbecue.

Since I had to work late (because they made this a WEEKDAY get together last minute, no less) I missed the first hour, which MIL criticized me for non stop.

Already I can see the whole event is just going to be about her. I also did not get a chance to go the store to pick out a card, so when MIL told me where to put gifts and I didn't have one, of course she made a big deal over that too.

She loudly called it out, too, and then pulled husband aside and asked why he couldn't have gotten a wife that would have bothered to get her MIL a present for Mother's Day. I was pretty upset over this, so I just walked out and told her not to expect me to show up for Christmas either.

Husband spent the whole night later on the phone with her trying to console her and siding with his mom, making me think I was TA and wrong for walking out and showing up empty-handed. After all, they ARE sort of my family too.

AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA. They/Your husband didn't seem to take your schedule into consideration whatsoever, and let you fall flat on your face when it came to the gift. Your husband should have supported you by 1) planning the celebration on a day more convenient for you or, if that wasn't possible, 2) get a gift in your name for your MIL . It's like he doesn't want your relationship with her to improve.

I also don't see him sticking up for you when your MIL is complaining to him about something pretty superficial (the gift), neither during her complaints or afterwards. Like, he could've told her you recently lost your own mother and this day is hard enough for you as is?? Why didn't he do that, or say anything in your (rightful) defense? Not even a peep when you arrived an hour after the event started because you were WORKING, like what's his deal?

I don't think you're TA at all and I'd stick to your guns about Christmas (or other events). ######


Prompt:
Both of my parents have been on an extended visit since. I also have an 18 month old daughter which they want to help look after, which sounded cool at first, but here’s the catch, every morning and throughout the day, they both get completely stoned off their asses and are, what I would consider, WAY too careless with my daughter. From today alone:

-Dad took my daughter downstairs to play, then stopped paying attention and she climbed up the stairs all by herself. We have baby gates on both ends of the steps, so, the gate was left open and she was ignored long enough to make it up 2 flights of steps.

-Mom decided she wanted to cook on the stove and was completely oblivious to my daughter reaching up to the stovetop almost grabbing a hot pan. Luckily I was there and hollered at her before she could.

-Mom was holding my daughter and tried to pass her to my dad, and “something” happened where my daughter kicked over a cup of coffee onto my wife’s Nintendo switch, completely bricking it. They both refused any responsibility and tried to blame the 18 month year old. Their completely baked indifference about ruining my wife’s Switch literally brought her to tears, but that could also be the hormones from her being 7 months pregnant.

-When they went to the down stairs living room, they left the baby gate open, luckily I was paying attention when she swung it open, and stopped her from trying to fall down the steps.

I finally said something just now to my mom about it, when my wife went to the store. I was calm, but very matter of fact and direct. She got super defensive. I tried my absolutely hardest to be chill and not be accusatory, but can tell I still hurt her feelings. I just want my parents to not smoke so much when she’s supposed to be caring after my daughter. I don’t feel like this is an unreasonable demand. AITA?

TLDR: Mom and Dad smoke too much weed and I don’t want them watching my toddler unless they dial it back. AITA? ######

Response: NTA. They've already demonstrated that they can't keep your kid safe while they're high. It's not unreasonable at all to ask them to smoke after they're done with childcare, and if they can't do that then it's certainly not your fault. ######


Prompt:
For context - I'm back in my hometown, staying with my parents, grandfather and sister in a small apartment which has only two bedrooms. Needless to say, this has led to cabin fever.

Today, my sister came to me with some news related to her job offer (they have delayed the joining date and reduced the salary) and I wasn't properly sympathetic because I was in the middle of some work (total asshole here, I agree).

Later, when talking to her and my mother things got heated because I hadn't displayed proper empathy to my sister. My mother got angry, and when she gets angry she starts screaming. She started telling me off and complaining about how much my sister and I fight.

Now, my parents have a very contentious marriage. I have grown up witnessing bitter fights every day, and my mother's constant complaining of my dad not living up to her expectations.

Back to the situation - I got fed up with my mother's screaming and I said well you shouldn't complain about us, you and dad fight too so how is this different.

Me saying this was unforgivable, and I have no right to comment on their marriage.

AITA? ######

Response: NTA. They're your parents, their marriage directly affects you. You have the right to comment on something that directly affects you. ######


Prompt:
Throwaway account, on mobile, first time poster, etc.

My partner (20M) “Jack” and I (20F) recently decided to get married. We have been starting to plan some broad aspects of our wedding so we’ll know more of what we’re looking for when we set them in stone. One thing we’ve started looking at is the number of guests we’re going to be inviting, since we want it to be as small of an affair as it can be with our large families.

This has me a little concerned about two guests I really want to invite: my ex best friend “Lindy”’s (20F) parents. Lindy and I were friends for about 15 years, but she basically ghosted me and told me I wasn’t her friend and she didn’t want me to contact her ever again. However, I have maintained some contact with her parents, who actually took my side and apologized for her. We have met in public a few times (I live in a different city now so not often) and they have met Jack. I sent them a card when they went through a tragedy, whenever we run into each other they are always so happy to see me. Overall I would say my relationship with them is great, and if they were not her parents there would be no question that we would invite them to the wedding.

I don’t know if I’d be an asshole for inviting them, since I have zero interest in inviting Lindy. If I invited them, I’m concerned it would look like I was still bitter toward Lindy. Also, I feel bad for probably putting them in a tough position, having to choose between myself and their daughter.

I asked Jack what he thought about it, and he said that if I would invite them if Lindy wasn’t their daughter, it shouldn’t make a difference that she is their daughter, especially since she was the one who ended the friendship and not me. I am still unsure, but I want to sort this out ASAP so that it doesn’t become a major stresser for me later.

WIBTA if I invited them even though I’m not inviting their daughter? ######

Response: NTA. They're your friends, Lindy isn't, and it seems like it's on her that she isn't. You shouldn't have to invite people you dislike to your big day. ######


Prompt:
So, my cousin and his wife have 2 daughters. Cora is 8, Anna is 15. Back in August, Anna and I were talking and I don't know what brought it up, but she mentioned that all she knew about any sex ed stuff was her mom told her women have periods and she assumed 'babies come out the butthole.' I know I might be the asshole for basically giving her the talk, because that's her parents' job, but I knew they almost certainly weren't going to tell her anything. I ended up going over pregnancy, what happens with periods, sex, protection and consent.

Anyhow, I was honestly curious about why her mom didn't tell her anything aside from "you're going to get a period every month and bleed." So, about 2 weeks ago, I went to my cousin's wife and respectfully asked why there hasn't been a sex ed talk between her and Anna. Mom said it was basically because her mom gave her an unclear sex ed when she was too young to understand, and she's had a very pathetic sex life. During the conversation, I tell my cousin's wife that it's my opinion that not giving a growing child age appropriate information about their bodies is like giving a 16 year old keys to a car and not telling them how to drive, how to maintain and care for a vehicle, and not giving them any driver's ed and expecting them to not to get tickets or get into accidents. I didn't say it in a rude or degrading way, I just stated it as my opinion and she could take it for what it was. I never told her that she's a bad mother, just that my opinion is that no sex talk is similar to giving a car to a teen with no driver's ed.

Well, a few days ago, I was back at my cousin's house and my cousin said that his wife was mad at me and she doesn't want me at the house because I said she was a bad mother. Am I the asshole for voicing my opinion? ######

Response: NTA. They're doing their kids a huge disservice, and you were right to respectfully point it out. ######


Prompt:
So I feel terrible and guilty but I also feel like I have no choice. Looking for advice and unbiased judgment.

I have a younger sister (26) who’s disabled. I won’t get into it but she’s unable to work a full time job and is on disability, which isn’t much. She’s been living with me for ~3 years. I pay for nearly everything including groceries but she chips in for utilities or takeout once in a while.

Last year she started dating a guy and got very serious very quickly. He’s underemployed with social anxiety and lives off of a little money his parents send him each month. He also moved in with us a few months back. I live in a larger house so didn’t mind 2 more people at the time.

Two weeks ago my sister told me she was pregnant. I was shocked. She said she’s around 1.5 months along and they’re excited to be parents. I didn’t know how to react and sat on it for a few days before approaching both of them and saying that I can’t have them raising a baby in my home.

I basically support both of them at this stage, letting them use their own money (again, not much) for leisure things like movies or video games. I asked them how they plan on paying for a baby and they didn’t think it was a big deal. I imagine if the baby comes I’ll probably end up paying for all 3 of them.

In the end I told both of them that they can stay with me until the baby comes, but I don’t want a baby in my home and the huge amount of responsibility that will probably fall to me. My sister cried and her bf accused me of being two faced, because they have nowhere else to go. I offered to help them pay rent for the first few months and budget for them but they’re resistant. My sister is now saying I’m essentially forcing them to give up their baby by kicking them out. I feel bad but I feel like if this keeps going I’ll be supporting an entire family on my own for who knows how long. AITA? ######

Response: NTA. They will get an additional SSI payment for the baby. And they qualify for subsidized housing, but they'll probably have to get on a list, so they should get on that. ######


Prompt:
My parents are divorced. They've really been fighting a lot, and they fight a lot about material possessions.

Try and one up each other getting me things, but also try to force me to leave them behind when I go to the other's houses, like they want their houses to be the best ones with the best things. Argue if I come home from the others house with things dirty or misplaced accusing the other of purposely stealing or destroying things.

It's ridiculous and it seems like a power play between them. And I'm sick of fighting over THINGS. Damn pieces of plastic or metal or whatever should not have this power over us.

So I told both my parents that THINGS that they fight about don't bring me happiness, they bring me sadness. And if there's any fighting or petty anger about a thing, I'm gonna give it away or throw it away because I'm sick of my life being ruled by stuff.

I won't take gifts anymore because they always come with terms and drama

And I have been doing it. I've gotten rid of most of what I own because of this pettiness. I really just have the bare minimum at each house. Both my parents had banned me from giving or throwing anything else away so now I've just picked a closet in each house that things go into, and once they're in they don't come out. If my parents try and take them out I put them back.

It's made me happier. No more fights about which parent "stole" a thing when that thing is gone. I don't have to remember as much about what I can take from house to house and what has to stay at one house so I won't start a fight

But both my parents are resentful of me for my switch in attitude. My mom is mad that I don't do some of my hobbies anymore and my dad is mad that I gave away things that he paid for.

AITA for giving up as many possessions as I can? ######

Response: NTA. They were using the objects as a powerplay against each other. They were trying to make you pick a side with shiny objects. Good on you for rising above it. I hope you can  slowly get some things back for the hobbies you care about. ######


Prompt:
English isn’t my first tongue so bear with me people

And yes there is a post in r/advice speaking about my problem

I (18 f) am a food photographer (very amateur one but working on it). My family uses me way too much for free gigs which i am trying to stop.

One day i was going to ask my mom something about ordering some gear and she just interpreted me and said “(my name) i am very proud of you that you volunteered to your aunt to do a photoshoot for her to be born son”

I didn’t volunteer but mom was sure her sister didn’t lie so i was kinda forced to do it as a really care for mom’s feelings.

Fast forward the day after he was bored i was called by my cousin asking when i will shoot the baby
I was half asleep and i told her i had an exam and an online lecture (true)
She told me they are expecting me to come and i was like ok whatever

Today i had some good sleep and went to their house at the afternoon to see the baby and attend a small religious celebration (not christian) and when i first arrived with my camera and a small soft box

My cousin snapped at me telling me i am not using that strong light on her bro (girl i know my business)
And i was like yeah sure
And then i was told by the family that they don’t want me doing the photoshoot as they already did it(i was actually happy when informed because babies aren’t my forte) but they were pissed telling me I didn’t keep my promise to them and so on so on

After the celebration i went home to study my other exam(pray for me) and got my equipments and left

Well they didn’t call me the AH but i knew they think about me like that and i am quite sure I wasn’t an AH but i want your opinion people ######

Response: NTA. They were trying to outright force you to do it. That's not ok and you totally have the right to refuse. Good luck on your exams! ######


Prompt:
I've previously made a post in regards to the situation with my neighbors but the short version is that they used to be my friends mutually with my wife but when my wife and I had issues and she left me temporarily they told her she should take me for everything I'm worth.

After finding out I decided to not have anything to do with them, well my child's birthday was this weekend and she really likes them so my wife asked me beforehand if it would be okay for them to come. I said it was fine but don't expect me to be all chit chatty with them and I would probably steer clear.

The day came and they never showed, I asked my wife how come they didn't come as I thought they were going to. She said that they know I hate them (I don't really hate them, I just don't want to associate with people who actively tried to harm me) that they noticed I won't even say hi to them anymore etc.

I feel bad that they missed out on the birthday party putting aside my feelings towards them. They however haven't made any attempts at reconciliation with me regardless and to my understanding don't even recognize why I dislike them.

So AITA for this situation? ######

Response:
 NTA. They were invited and choose not to come. Do they know that your wife told you they said to “take you for everything your worth?”. Regardless, I’m sure it puts both sides in an awkward spot.

Edit: Changed ex-wife to wife and update slightly. ######


Prompt:
I know this sounds bad.  I feel bad about it but I don't think I should pay them more.

Here's why:

- I was never on the lease
- I didn't pay any bond
- I was sub renting
- I gave them 10 workdays notice,  then paid for another 2,5 weeks to make it a month.
- I communicated everything with them that they need to find another person
- I made all the ads and pictures of the pace
- I made a letter to the landlord stating due to xyz I cannot be in this country anymore and if the rent could be lowered.

I was in this place for 3 months.  All went fine but then hell broke loose. I had to get back home since my family needed me.
When my roommates (24 f & m) heard this, they pushed me to get on the lease.

Furthermore they were understanding, helping me by just talking and I made ads to find someone new.  I had several people coming by the place but they didn't get my room since they wanted someone long term (year+) and between 20-30.

I had to catch a plane and put most of my stuff into storage.

They couldn't find anyone after 2 weeks and they asked me to transfer rent.  I told them I need to pay for 2 places now so I'll only do 2 weeks for you guys to find someone new.  They were grateful.

2 weeks later they explode and expect me to keep on paying since they haven't found someone new. It would be my responsibility and they are calling me names now saying they might have to move now etc.

I feel horrible for them but to be fair why would I pay for a place I haven't lived in for 3 weeks and I don't have any responsibility for?

One side I'm like maybe I should help them out even more.  But I'm out of a job and stuff is bad in my hometown now too.
I need the money myself. ######

Response: NTA. They were given adequate time to get another roommate or find other options. Yes it sucks, but they need to be posting the place up or figuring it out for themselves as well, you’ve done what you can to help them. Even going above & beyond paying those two weeks you gave them extra not living there. ######


Prompt:
So my sister was due to get married before the coronavirus struck and closed everything down so her Hen do was planned before hand but I couldn’t go/afford to go due to uni commitments and lack of funds, which she was fine with and understood. Obviously it was cancelled and they’ve ended up rescheduling the wedding in a few months time (current time being 22/07/2020). This means that they’ve had to reschedule the hen do too. This is where an issue comes in. I was removed from the group chat when I said I couldn’t go and haven’t been told anything until a few days ago. They’ve planned the new hen do for the weekend before my birthday and are wanting to know if I can go. However, in this time my partner has been planning a surprise for my birthday for about a month now which so happens to be that weekend, it’s not like it is just another day it’s an important birthday (21st). I don’t tend to celebrate my birthdays because the effort has never been put in for them by anyone but my partner this year is determined to make it special for me. I’ve told my sister this and she’s started being rude and ignoring me being really snappy and just it’s super awkward to be around her now. I asked my friends if I’m being shitty here and they’ve all replied that I am and I can rearrange my plans for another time but that’s the only time I can as the week after I have to move back to uni. If I could rearrange I would, but whatever my surprise is it’s not refundable (I asked just in case). I just don’t understand why she was understanding then but not now?

So really Am I the Asshole for not going to my sisters hen do because I have birthday plans? ######

Response: NTA. They were fine with you not being able to attend before, why is it an issue now? You have prior plans/engagements. It’s rude to make people move things around they already had planned/set in motion just for a bachelorette party. It’s not like you’d be missing her wedding. Over dramatic if you ask me. ######


Prompt:
So the other night the girls parents were over at my house and I decided I would be somewhat of a nice person and make everyone a nice dinner even with the rocky past I have with them. (They don’t agree with me traveling for work a month at a time)
Well whenever I would leave the living room to check on things in the kitchen I could hear snarky comments just loud enough for me to hear but quiet enough so they could sound like they’re “trying” not to be heard. After about an hour of it my girlfriend told me what they were saying about me to her. I walked out of the kitchen and told them that they had to leave because I wasn’t going to be disrespected like that in my own home. My girl told me I could’ve handled it in a different way but I just couldn’t tolerate it in my own home aita? ######

Response: NTA. They were being jerks and you don't accept that in your house. Have you talked to them about their dislike for your travelling beforehand? ######


Prompt:
After I was born, my parents, who were drug addicts and have been arrested prior for petty crimes, we're seemed unfit parents and when I was an infant my grandparents were awarded full custody.
I'm sixteen years old and my grandparents are practically my whole world. They have told me many times that if I wanted to reconnect with my mother and father that it was my decision and that they'd support me 100%, but I never wanted to.

My Mother recently reconnected with my grandparents (I've refused to talk to her) and she said she wanted to have at least partial custody of me. She also threatened that if my grandparents didn't help her resolve the situation peacefully, she was going to take them to court, and that's what ended up happening. Fortunately, since it was found that she wasn't in the position to care for me, and since I didn't want to live with her (my birth father, apparently, died a few years ago) she didn't get any custody or visitation.

Right when we were leaving the courthouse, the last time I saw her, she told me I was selfish for not letting my grandparents live the rest of their lives son peace without having to care for an ungrateful grandson. It hurt and so I stormed off, but I've been thinking about it ever since- am I TA for not letting my grandparents enjoy their silver years? ######

Response: NTA. They WANTED you. Never forget that. If they didn't, they would not only have not raised you all those years, but they wouldn't have fought for you in court presently. ######


Prompt:
My mother was no saint. She had her demons like the rest of us but hers put up more of a fight. In her previous marriage she went through a bad drug addiction and did a lot of damage to her ex husband and their kids, Duncan (36M) and John (34M), who were still teenagers at the time.

Long story short she ran off with another addict (my father) and had me. Wasn't an easy childhood but soon enough my mother picked herself up again and started working on being better. When I was 9, she finally built up the strength to leave my and take me with her. We were broke and homeless so she went to ask Duncan and John for help. I remember her going on her knees asking Duncan to take us in and John throwing us out. Calling her a slut and an addict. That night we slept in the streets but still my mother tried another three times to reconcile and mend things but they never cared.

Last year my mother got a heart attack and almost died. She was diagnosed with CAD. I messaged my *brothers* about her condition. Their response? "We're not giving you any money. Stop contacting us". Well she died earlier this year from after a period of rapid heart attacks. I told myself fuck them and I buried my mother at an intimate gathering with her close friends and my wife.

Recently my wife had been asking me to send them a letter so they at least know she's no longer with us. So I did. Well now the both of them have completely lost their shit sending me dozens of messages about how fucked up I am from keeping their mother's death from them and sending threats about how they're going to take 'legal action' against me so I should be prepared. My wife says she wouldn't go as far as calling me an asshole but I probably should have told them sooner. So AITA? ######

Response: Nta. They told you to stop contact, and you did. That choice was theirs. They could have seen she had changed and made an attempt to have you both in their lives, even if she hurt them. Sorry for your loss. I'm glad you got to have some good memories with her. ######


Prompt:
I've just come home from spending a long weekend with my family for the first time since the pandemic. I usually go see them once a month but for obvious reasons I haven't been there since Feb.
Now, for some back story. I come from a single parent household. It's always been my mum, my sister(20f) and I(24f).
Ever since I can remember, I've always been the fat sister. My younger sister has always been beautiful and fit and I have always been compared to her.
A while back I went into a bit of a rough time with depression and I gained a lot of weight. Since the lockdown started I have been dieting and exercising, I have been really happy and have set myself a goal to be on my healthy weight by August next year, everything is going according to plan, I have told my family this but they still insist on making me feel like "the fat one" even though there are so many other aspects of me as a person, I feel like I will never be anything more than "the fat one" I came home and my mum (who is very religious) started sending me bible quotes and telling me that I clearly don't love myself, and that I'm going to die of a heart attack soon.
While my sister spent the whole weekend shaming me for every single bite I took.
After my mum's messages I told her that I loved her but I was going to take a step back from them as I felt like the whole dynamic is turning very toxic and I can feel myself slipping back into that depressed person that I worked so hard to put behind. So I left the family group chat and now everyone is angry at me. They say they are only looking out for me but I can't help but think that's just not the case. AITA? ######

Response: NTA. They sound like toxic people. You should be able to separate yourself from them as much as you need to. Props to you for living a healthier lifestyle! ######


Prompt:
This happened a long time ago - when I was about 14 and on a family holiday to a holiday park kind of place (Center Parcs for anyone in Europe). When I was a young teenager, I was kinda chubby and didn’t get much attention from boys like some of my friends did.

So anyway, one Valentine’s Day, my family wrote a fake card from a ‘secret admirer’ guy asking me to meet him at a the central place (where all the bars and restaurants etc are). Straight away I thought it was BS and laughed it off saying yeah whatever. Well over the course of the day, my whole family (mum, stepdad and sister) basically convinced me it was real, promising they didn’t send it and just genuinely trying to convince me to go to the place we were supposed to meet. Eventually, I thought I’d just go when my younger sister said she’d come with me and we’d just hang out in the area. I wasn’t completely convinced but was convinced enough to go.

Sure enough, we get to the place, hang out for a bit and no one shows. All of a sudden, my mum and stepdad show up and they all start laughing saying it was a prank. I tried to laugh along but obviously I was completely humiliated. I think the worst part is that they still occasionally bring it up and laugh about it. Recently, I told them I thought it was a horrible thing to do and I actually don’t find it funny at all. They all make out I’m being being an asshole and can’t take a joke or that I’m too sensitive.

So, AITA in the sense that I should just get over it? ######

Response: NTA. They sound like horrible people. ######


Prompt:
I typed this on my phone, so sorry if I make any mistakes lol.

I do a lot of freelance work through instagram, work that consists of editing photos and videos. I am entering my junior year in high school, so this is how I make my own money. I do get a lot of clients, and I have frequent clients who come back constantly.

I had this one client who started up their youtube channel. I designed their logo, banner, and I edit all of their videos and make all of their thumbnails. I worked with them for almost a year and got paid about 500 dollars or so. Back in March, they asked for me to edit some videos of theirs (they record a couple in advance and upload them as soon as they receive the final version), but the problem was that because of COVID, they didn't have their paycheck yet and they were asking if they could pay later. I usually never do this but I said okay, since I have been working with them for a while now. Then in March, the same problem happened. Me being stupid said sure. In the end I edited about 12 videos, and made 12 thumbnails. I woke up the next day and they blocked me. They stole my work and uploaded it and they didn't pay me.

I was livid. I used to do free work and I stopped because the feeling of not being compensated for hard work is just horrible. One time, their internet was down so they asked me to upload this video I had edited. They gave me their Gmail email and their password that time. So, I turned on my computer and I logged in. They didn't have a 2FA setup, so I linked my phone number and I changed the password. I hid their youtube account (so it's not completely gone), and I sent them fifty cents through CashApp and told them if they didn't pay me what I deserved I would delete it.

Fast forward a few days, I get a notification from my CashApp, that I got paid, and they unblocked me from Instagram, and dm'd me. I disabled 2FA, unhid their youtube channel, and gave them their account back. I blocked them right after. AITA? ######

Response: NTA. They sound like cheats and thieves, and you did the right thing to get your money without causing further harm to anyone. ######


Prompt:
Pretty much every time I go out I see numerous people wearing masks incorrectly in ways that make the masks completely useless. Most commonly having the mask only covering their mouth and not their nose. This seems like common sense, you breathe through your nose so the mask needs to also cover your nose.

The worst is when its food places, a local ice cream place, the coffee shop, fast food, etc.

WIBTA for reporting these employees? ######

Response: NTA. They shouldn't be wearing their masks incorrectly during a pandemic and people should know. ######


Prompt:
My sister and I are twins and both got $100 for Christmas and get $100 for our birthdays, and that is the only money we get without working. I worked part time at a local deli and my sister worked on and off at a movie theater. My parents then bought my sister a prom dress for $300, after telling me to get a pc I would have to use my own money. She didn’t do anything to get it, it’s not like she got straight As or made a sports team.

They said they would return it afterwards, but she’s getting to keep it and not have to pay because they don’t want to due to corona virus. But I still have to work for the pc, which I can’t even do because of corona, even though I was essential. They made me quit.

I said it was unfair that she got $300 for no reason and my parents said that prom is special for girls and that because she missed it’s only fair she keeps the dress. I would have gone as well, I have a girlfriend. I brought it up again today and they told me to stop being rude about it(I was polite). My sister then rubbed it in my face.

Am I going nuts? This isn’t fair right? AITA? ######

Response: NTA. They not only did they drop $300 on one kid and not the other based on a sexist assumption, but they also made you quit your job, thus losing you your only source of income. They are horrible people. ######


Prompt:
So Let me start off by saying that I am in the 8th grade and my sister is in the 11th

Since online class has started I have been struggling with the work load, combined with other tutoring lessons I usually have to work into the weekend which does not please my parents at all, which I understand because then I can’t do other stuff like hiking or doing walks with them.

It was all fine until they sat me down one afternoon to tell me that I was not meeting my expectations that they have set for me and that I should be working harder like my sister. Who has her work done in the first 3 days of getting the assignment. They carried on repeating themselves about how I should be more like my sister and all that.

This occurred about 1 month ago and since then they have been constantly telling me to work harder like my sister. Until I finally just snapped yesterday, I started to break down with tears forming in my eyes and I started saying
“ Stop fucking comparing me to my sister, please!”.

I know I probably went overboard for that but it was all the emotion that I had built up over this time and I know I probably am the ass hole , but I just want more opinions on this.

Currently I have still not had another long interaction since yesterday but I hope we can settle since soon.

Also sorry I know formatting is bad, sorry for that I’m on phone. Also I know it’s not as good as the others on here but I just needed to talk,
Thank you for reading. ######

Response: NTA. They need to realize that what they are doing is more harmful than good. Don’t be discouraged because many people have a hard time with online studying. You will make it through this 😄 ######


Prompt:
Ok, this is a weird one.

I've been having major cabin fever recently, working from home and generally being stuck at home, especially when the weather has been warming up.

Getting outside helps a lot but I've mainly stayed in my own yard. I have a hammock up between two trees and I've slept in there at night under the stars. It's nice, it's peaceful, and it makes me feel a lot less like a rat in a cage nowadays.

I know it's weird but I enjoy it. It is peaceful and helps me destress after work.

But my neighbors are bothered by it, they said it is weird, they don't want someone sleeping outdoors near where their kids play. They don't like me being out there so much because their family has less privacy, and it would be better if I stayed in the house at night.

I said I don't pay them any attention, I am just doing something relaxing to stay sane because my work and other things have made me stressed.

AITA for wanting to keep sleeping outdoors? ######

Response:
 NTA. They need to get over themselves. You're in your own backyard, and while it may be uncommon behavior, you're not doing anything wrong. If they want more privacy, they can put up a fence, plant trees, close their blinds/curtains, whatever. It's on them.

ETA: My response is based on the assumption that you have your own backyard that's separate from your neighbors' property. ######


Prompt:
Hello,

So I run a shop with a big window in a very busy street. For the last month, a dog has been pooping around the area of my shop, and the owners do not pick up after it. I've had my suspicions about who it was, and got visual confirmation last week.

The day after I got visual confirmation, I caught them again in the act, and snapped a picture of them. I then confronted them about it, and they basically told me to mind my own business.

So I got their picture blown up and printed with the title THESE PEOPLE DON'T PICK UP THEIR DOG'S POOP, IF YOU'VE WALKED IN POOP THEY ARE TO THANK, and stuck the poster in the window of my shop.

I've been having a lot of amused comments by my customers, but the people in the picture have gone insane, and have come by the shop many times to scream at me. I told them untill they change their attitude the poster is staying up.

Regarding the law, I'm not too sure what side I'm on, but not picking up their dog's poop is def illegal and can carry a hefty fine where I live (France), so I dobt they'll pursue legal action.

Some of my friends have said i'm an AH for publicaly shaming them. The way I see it they brought this upon themselves.

So reddit, AITA ? ######

Response:
 NTA. They let their dog shit IN PUBLIC and didn't pick it up. Why would they expect to be shamed in private for that.

Also, hilarious move on your part. 👏👏👏 ######


Prompt:
So in the UK the minimum hourly wage is based on age. For an 18-21 year old, me, it’s £6.45 however for a 25+ it’s around £8.50.

Because of this low wage and working 30 hours (26.5 with breaks) a week at a crappy minimum wage retail job I only make about £170 a week. £680 a month. £8,160 a year. That doesn’t take into account being sent home early, unpaid sick days ect ect. So I’m about £4,000 short annually to pay taxes.

Two weeks ago my boss was complaining that taxes were going to be going up because the government is paying out furloughs. She asked me what I thought about paying more tax next year and I said:

“I don’t earn enough to pay taxes, so it won’t really be my problem.”

She stood there confused and said:

“Oh but you’ll be paying taxes some day.”

So I quickly replied with:
“If I keep this job and the same hours I won’t be paying taxes for the next 7 years because I earn that little at this job. I’m not complaining about not paying taxes but it just shows how little this job pays me.

My boss stood there god smacked, gritting her teeth at me, and didn’t know what to say.

A week later, last Saturday, I got called into the managers office where I was confronted by my manager, the assistant manager and the operations director of the company. To which I was verbally ganged up on by the three of them. All because I offended my manager by complaining about how little I get paid and that I should be great full to even have a job in the first place. I just sat there and took it for half an hour.

Eventually I got fed up of this and walked out of the shop and my shift.

So AITA here? I know I talked back to my manager ######

Response: NTA. They know they pay you very little, and while they probably don't like being confronted the way they reacted to that is really over the top. You made a fair point, while maybe not the most diplomatically brought point :) ######


Prompt:
So some backstory. I have non epileptic seizures that were pretty bad for a while. At that time, we also didn’t know they weren’t epileptic. I was in and out of hospital, in ICUs and medically induced comas, and couldn’t work. It also wrecked my mental health for a while. At the same time, my brother has been living rent free with my parents and is seen as the golden son, despite a long history of theft, violence, and manipulation.

My family had a pretty serious issue with it. They wouldn’t visit while I was in hospital and refused my wife any help when she asked. Last year around easter, I got an email (while in hospital) that I wasn’t welcome home because my illness was disruptive and my mental health “shenanigans” were not welcome. I was deeply hurt. This was the last straw after a year of limited support and while we’ve worked on things since, they’re still very snippy or dismissive if I mention how my health is improving and the progress I’ve been making.

On one hand, I get it. I was probably a little whiny. We thought I was dying or would need brain surgery. We were scared and needed some support and maybe went about asking for it the wrong way. During this time, my mom also had knee surgery (we didn’t ask for help while she recovered). But it still really feels wrong that a family who insist “family above all” couldn’t even make an effort to see me in hospital or allow me to see them and my niece when doing well enough to travel.

Next month, I’m moving with my wife to be with her family in Hawaii. I’ll be five thousand miles away and I’m planning to significantly reduce contact with my family when I move. Am I the asshole for planning this? Should I be giving them another chance? Or am I in the right to cut them out? ######

Response:
 NTA. They have you so convinced that you were a burden that you say you understand them resenting you for having seizures. That is awful. You deserve for people who love you to support you and help take care of you. They also clearly think you were faking it, which is gross.

I think you’d be justified in going very low contact and if they ask why, have an email waiting in drafts that you wrote while calm about their lack of support and love when you needed it most.

I sincerely hope your wife’s family is better to you guys and that you are able to start a happy new healthy life. ######


Prompt:
I’m a senior in HS. In December one of my classmates got into a bad car accident that did a lot of damage. She had several surgeries, and is in need of more for her face. Her insurance won’t cover it, hence the GoFundMe.

I was never friendly with this girl. She spread nasty rumors about a friend of mine, and I always had a tainted view of her. Outside of that incident I never talked to her, and didn’t know she knew that I existed.

So my classmates are sending around a GoFundMe and a link to T-shirts for sale and I see that my artwork has been used!

My artwork has nothing to do with her cause, it was a Picasso style self portrait that was an assignment for class. I posted it to twitter. They were using it on T-shirts and in promotions without my permission.

I got into contact with the girl and her friend who is running everything and asked them to take my artwork off of their GoFundMe. At first they said that they didn’t know it was mine, and would credit me (they cropped my siggy our though...) I told them that I didn’t want it credited and preferred it to be taken down.

The told me they already had T-shirts, people recognized it for her GoFundMe. I honestly didn’t care. Then they started guilt tripping me about it, and I told them I would go through other means to get it taken down.

Then the girl posts screenshots of our DMs on her twitter, directing people at me, and telling them how heartless I am. I am getting tons of hate messages, and people telling me to just “let her use my shorty artwork.” I can’t even open up any social media without fear of getting shitty messages from my classmates.

I talked to my mom about it and she thinks I should have just kept quiet about it as it’s hard not to look like an asshole for refusing to let her use the image. I’m feeling pretty confused, because I think I have the right to say where my artwork goes. AITA for not letting her use my art? ######

Response: NTA. They even cropped out your signature! ######


Prompt: Here's the situation. I've been living in this shared apartment with 2 other poeple for 3 years now. The other two havent always been the same two people but keep constantly changing like every 6-12 months. So I'm not really building a relationship with them here. And for 3 years I've been living there I've bought/brought almost every necessity there can be and I never charged any of the others for it. Practically 95% of the kitchen tools and whatnot is from me. Be it pans, pots, knives, mixers, even a freezer, its all mine. And I plan on taking everything with me when I move in with my gf sometime soon, like in 1-2 years. I paid for it, so why shouldn't I take it? I'm definitely planning on doing so but 10% of me still feels kind of bad to let the other 2 people, whoever they may be until then, sit there with just one shitty ass old pot and no kitchen machines (toaster, mixer, microwave). ######

Response:
 NTA. They can buy their own stuff. You’re very nice to think of your roommates (whom you barely have a relationship with), but you shouldn’t have to re-buy everything.

Also, if you’re not planning to move in with your gf for like 2 years, that’s a ways a way, and I think you’re putting the cart before the horse to even be worrying about this right now since it sounds like you’ll have different roommates by then anyways. ######


Prompt:
 My brother and his wife are having a hard time with paying their rent right now, so they asked if they can stay with us for awhile.

After talking it over with my husband we agreed that they could move into our RV and we could hook up the water and electricity from our house. It’s not a huge RV, but it’s got one full size bed and two twin size beds that their kids can sleep on.

My sil is very insulted by the idea of living out in our driveway when we have “plenty” of space inside. My brother was also upset because family would let family stay with them. He also doesn’t like that he would be the one responsible for taking the RV to the nearby rest stop area to drain the black tank.

They both said they would much rather prefer to stay in our living room or that we could put our kids and one of their sons in our sons room and they can share our daughters room with their younger son. Or maybe have some of the kids camp out in the living room.

None of those options appeal to us. With everything how it is and us all being stuck at home my husband, our kids, and I have gotten on each other’s nerves more than a few times. We feel like taking away our kids private spaces would be really disastrous.

As for the living room my husband and I are both working from home, so we need our own separate areas to focus. My husbands job works with other branches in other countries so he’s often working really late at night or really early in the morning in the living room. So having people sleeping in there wouldn’t work out well.

If they were just staying for a few days we probably could make due with them staying in the living room, but they will likely need to stay with us for weeks, if not months. ######

Response: NTA. They asked for a huge favor and then tried to dictate the terms of it and push back your boundaries. That’s a red flag and suggests their entire tenure in your driveway would be spent with them finding ways to be in your house, in your way and in your wallet. If they don’t like the terms of your offer they’re free to take another one. ######


Prompt:
Sister: sis
Brothers-in-law: bil
Me

I am renting a room in their home and am paying the agreed amount of rent on time. Some info about my sis and bil. They recently had a baby and have another on the way. They are in financial problems because they are constantly updating the house. New flooring, new granite counters, added an addition, etc. additionally, they owe a ton of money to their credit card companies because they are huge spenders.

Now they need more money and are pressuring me to pay them more than the agreed amount. They can barely pay their mortgage and sometimes pay it late. Also they have been eating my food, using my supplies (toilet paper, soap,etc), I help with my niece and cleaning.

on top of everything I have been watching my niece for free for hours. We are all in the medical field. So 12 hour shifts, 3-5 days a week depending on the OT available. So when I watch my niece, I am watching her for 12+ hours, 3 days a week. I haven’t mentioned payment becuase we are family.

But now we are regularly fighting due to Covid workload stress and me being upset about my prepped food being taken. I’m trying to be supportive becuase they are my family but I feel unsafe whenever they threaten to evict me. I don’t have a back up plan right now.

So we are all stressed out for various reasons. AITA for fighting with them at all? Should I be more supportive during this unprecedented time? I feel like I am being taken advantage of here. ######

Response: NTA. They are seriously taking advantage of you here. It sounds like they need your rent check pretty badly, and they need your help around the house and babysitting even more. You are doing way more than is fair to ask of you and they are definitely AHs in return. These times are hard for everyone including you, do not feel the need to take on more than you already are. You sister and BIL should think you are a saint for all that you already do and put up with. ######


Prompt: My mom sent me a video on Facebook known as the "plandemic" video. Basically this video has unproven claims about Dr. Anthony Fauci and the handling of the Covid-19 pandemic. I went to the YouTube channel and saw many other "conspiracy" videos such as how 5G can cause cancer. I decided to report the YouTube channel for being misleading and it got taken down today. At Mother's Day dinner (of all times and places), I brought up how the channel got shut down. She says that I was disrespectful for reporting the channel and that I am essentially her censor. I, however, don't find anything wrong with my actions as these conspiracy theories can be really harmful. Am I the asshole? ######

Response: NTA. These YouTube videos were spreading false information that people might use to do dangerous things. You reported it, YouTube agreed, it got taken down. ######


Prompt:
Before I tell you the story I will say I don't have an issue with people believing what they want. With that said, on with the story.

Before the lockdown I was sitting on my SIL's doorstep talking and a van pulled into our shared driveway (Rural community). A woman got out with a little girl (about 4 or 5). The woman asked if we had thought about what happens after we die. I immediately said, "Thank you but neither of us is interested in converting." I would never speak for my sister in law normally but I knew her thinking on religion and that she has even less filter than I do, so figured since I am the more diplomatic, I should respond.  The woman said ok but then asked if her daughter could read us a verse out of the bible. I had just told her we weren't interested and now I'm irritated but when it comes to kids I have a real soft spot and hate to disappoint them or hurt their feelings if I can avoid it. I looked at my SIL and she just nodded. I said alright and the little girl read the verse (can't remember for the life of me) and thanked her then asked the woman to send her daughter back to the van. Once the little girl got into the van, I looked at the woman and berated her for using her little girl like that and how dare she not accept a no from us after we politely declined. I also told her to never show her face on my property again and to get out (I never swore or threatened her in any way). I then went to the nearest Kingdom hall and told them about it and told them I wanted my address put on the no contact list and that I would tell the next JW that shows up to go away in less than polite wording.

AITA for reacting like that. ######

Response: NTA. Theres nothing wrong with people asking you if you are interested in hearing about their faith, but this woman refused to take your polite no for an answer and tried to use her daughter to get you to listen, which is not okay. Since she was on your SIL property I think It's your right to tell her off for that. It was good/nice of you to make sure the daughter was back in the van first so she wouldn't hear what you had to say to the mother. Let's hope they won't bother you again, or if they do that a polite no tells them off. ######


Prompt:
Sorry if the title makes no sense, but I’ll do my best to explain it.

So basically, my friends dad always comments on things in my life but makes it like things only happen to me because I’m gay. Here’s an example: I’m studying law, her dad said that I’m studying law because “gay people like fucking bad boys” - meaning I only want to be a lawyer so I can have sex with clients. I currently have a cold sore, he said it's because I'm always sucking dick. If he finds out I'm reading a book, he'll tell her that it's "probably a gay porno mag". It's stupid stuff like that.

But it really annoys me. At first, it didn't, but then it didn't stop. I also don't know why my friend tells him this stuff - like me reading a book isn't something worth telling your family about. She's told me that "he's not homophobic, he just doesn't like seeing it." (I know that's an assholish thing to say, that's not what I want to know).

In retaliation, I've ended up saying stuff back like "your dad is just sad that I didn't represent him when he was in trouble with the law," "I got the cold sore from him, he should probably get an STI check," or like "I thought I recognised your dad on the cover of the magazine?". He doesn't find it funny, and he calls me a dick head, or a "poof". My friend also knows I don't like people commenting on my sexuality, or people talking about me when I'm not there.

AITA for flipping his comments to make him sound gay too? ######

Response:
 NTA. Theres no such thing as "not being homophobic but not liking seeing it AND harassing someone for it." He got what we deserved. HE'S the one with the problem. If he doesn't like those jokes towards him, he shouldn't have made them.

Stay strong! ######


Prompt:
This is a weird one, sorry in advance. This was 5 months ago and it’s still a fight my bf and I are having. Clearly since pregnancy and miscarriages aren’t easy topic for people to talk about, I’ve come here.

I (27F) was about 6 weeks pregnant when I started bleeding really heavily randomly. To cut a long story short - I was miscarrying. Didn’t know I was pregnant, wasn’t upset about it. It was really whatever. I have no intention of children, I guess the shot failed me.

They sent me home from the hospital after a mental health check to make sure I was okay. Like I said, wasn’t upset about it, didn’t bother me much besides the physical pain obviously. They gave me the pill that helps to move the process along faster at home instead of waiting. When I was at home and sitting on the toilet, I felt it like fall out. So I just kind of look at for awhile and said “I didn’t think I would be able to see it!” (it was in the sac I think?) My boyfriend then said “stop being so fucking weird about this.” He then accused me of wanting to KEEP IT. When I said “it’s just curiosity, this is new to me too.” He stormed off and said he doesn’t want to be with someone who could be so heartless as not to care about this and treat “him” like a science project.

I asked him if he wanted to be pregnant or have kids and he said no but I should “respect” his kid more than that. I told him it’s happening to me and we just feel different about it. I wasn’t trying to be insensitive, I said sorry at the time but he hasn’t let it go.

Was I the asshole? It was something that was just happening to me and I was curious about it. He’s never hinted he’s wanted to kids or pro life of anything so this attitude is new to me. ######

Response: NTA. there’s no playbook on how you’re supposed to react to a miscarriage it’s a deeply personal experience. Your boyfriend is being immature and weirdly possessive. It just kind of creeped me out how he said you should have more respect for “his kid” like it wasn’t also a part of you. ######


Prompt:
I have a non identical twin brother named Justin. I'm under no illusion that he's the better looking between us. He's a great guy if not a bit philandering.

Since we were bored yesterday, we video called my friend Jay and his wife and we just caught up with each other over a couple glasses of wine. We eventually got to playing this game where someone asks a question and we all answer. I asked everyone who their cheat pass (someone you would cheat with if allowed) is and everyone gave celebrities crushes as expected, except my loving wife. She first asked about specifics. Whether it was just a one time thing, the whole night or a fling. We all agreed on whole night and then she blurted "Then Justin! Omg we'd fuck all night long". We all broke into laughter because we thought she was talking about Justin Bieber.

Jay then made a comment about Timberlake being better than Bieber and my wife clarified that she actually meant my brother. Like wtf? Obviously things got awkward so they ended the call and we got into a fight over it. She said I shouldn't be angry because I was the one who asked her and now I'm judging her truthful answer. I spent the night in the guest room and even this morning she was completely unapologetic and said I should be the one apologizing for being an ass last night and "judging her truth". Aita? ######

Response: NTA. There’s an unspoken rule that you name a celebrity, or some other person you’d definitely never actually be able to do it with, not *a relative of someone else who is there and definitely not your brother in law*. ######


Prompt:
Over the past two years I’ve brought up wanting to meet my (35f) boyfriend’s (32m) best friend a couple times (“I want to meet so-and-so”, and “so when am I going to meet so-and-so?”) and the responses were, respectively, nothing, and “whenever”. Since then I’ve fought about it with him twice and the latest one he told me I’m making a big deal out of nothing, and suggested meeting his friend would “mean something about our relationship,” which, in the end, is true.

I feel like I’m not good enough to meet his friend, that he’s embarrassed of me or maybe he’s embarrassed of his friend (?), that he’s hiding that part of his personality, that he’s ashamed of me, that I’m not good enough, and so on. Maybe he thinks I’ll embarrass him with my being a total idiot? On and on, this is just a slice of the thoughts I have about it.

My bf is very private and likes a lot of space and distance. He doesn’t like talking about himself. The only people in his life who even know I exist are his mom and her husband, and not because we were intentionally introduced. (Met them on our one year anni)

Am I overreacting? Is this not really a big deal at all? I know my feelings are valid, but not sure my perspective is... TIA ######

Response: NTA. There's very few instances where this would be acceptable conduct.  This isn't one of them. I'd stay away from anyone that requires that excessive amount of space after 2 years of a relationship. Emotionally distant people aren't for everyone. ######


Prompt:
I (24M) still live at home, I'm aiming to move out within the next two years.

My sister (18F)  usually lives with my dad but has been spending more time with us, shes been with her boyfriend for 3 years, I've been with my girlfriend for almost 2.

My mother is obsessed with the idea of having a grandchild, she wont stop talking about it with me and my girlfriend but we dont want children.

So, she turned the "joke"  onto my sister.

She brings it up every chance she can.

We were eating dinner last night when my mother once again said "so when are you giving me a grandson *sisters name*?"

This wouldn't be a problem if she wasnt sending my sisters childrens names and if she was joking, she tries to pass it off as a joke but we can tell shes being serious.

My sister genuinely feels pressured, she doesnt have a backbone though so wont complain.

I snapped at my mother and told her to back tf off, she isnt getting a grandchild from either of us anytime soon and maybe she should focus on parenting her son (10) instead of this BS.

She didnt react but later on we heard her crying about it to our dad.

My father texted me and my sister telling us if we cant take a joke and will be disrespectful we both know where the door is and can leave at anytime, and that we are assholes for being oversesnsitve and that I could've let my sister deal with it (she really doesnt like arguments)

AITA? ######

Response: NTA. There's nothing funny about pressuring someone to have a child, especially an 18 yo. ######


Prompt:
So I (25m) and my fiance (29f) are renting the house we live in from my mom (51f) with no written rental agreement. My mom wants us to assume the mortgage from her and we live here for the next 17 years until the mortgage is paid off.

The problem is that fiance and I both have to travel an hour or more to work and mom is using the house as her personal storage unit. Also the house needs a lot of work done to it because whoever added the additions to the house did a terrible job. We don't want to live in the house because we don't have room for our stuff and it is causing our relationship to have unnecessary arguments.

We want to live closer to work especially since I have to be to work at 5am. Whenever we say anything to mom about moving she replies "you won't ever find a better deal than what I'm offering, assuming the mortgage is your best option to own your own house." The last time I mentioned moving she said "how can I afford my camper if you move?"

So reddit WIBTA if fiance and I move? ######

Response: NTA. There's no written agreement and you are not responsible for your mother's camper. ######


Prompt:
 My roommates (21-22F) and I (21F) were tanning in our backyard when my neighbor (N) peeked over our fence to ask about the beehive he found near our garage. Right then, beekeepers (B1/B2) showed up and asked to use our driveway so I left to move my car.

N and B1 then started making sexual comments about my roommate (R) saying they’re only here to "look at the view" and that her bathing suit was "too skimpy". When I came back, my roommates told me what happened and how both men scoffed when R called them out.

My roommates begged me to not say anything but I was pissed. I told the men "The comments you made were not okay. You made a group of young women feel so uncomfortable they no longer feel safe in their own backyard. I don't care if you *think* you did nothing wrong, at the end of the day you made comments towards a 21 year old girl that made her feel unsafe. You would be pissed if some stranger did this to your daughter so learn from your mistakes and don't do it again."

N and B1 tried to apologize but they said “sorry if my words were misconstrued” and I kinda lost my shit. I said "I won’t accept an apology in which you take NO responsibility for your actions. You know what you said and you know it's wrong. I don't care you're from a different generation, you know making sexual comments towards a 21 year old is gross. Think about your behavior, understand why it was wrong, and never do it again."

I'm concerned I took it too far by denying their apologies. My dad said I should have let it go sooner and not pushed the issue. AITA? ######

Response: NTA. There was no apology to accept because there was no apology given. ######


Prompt:
A few days ago, my (16F) mom (50) told me that she recorded me singing in the shower from outside the door. Later, one of her friends was over and asked me if I would sing. My mom said that she showed him the video. I didn't say much then, but today, I brought it up and told her she shouldn't record me without my permission or send it to other people.

She almost immediately started screaming at me, saying she never said anything about showing someone else, and that she recorded it for herself because I never sing for her when she asks. It seems like a pretty big deal to her. I get the feeling now she's going to be mad at me for the next few weeks. AITA? ######

Response: NTA. There something in the air? Lots of moms absolutely losing their shit at their kids for absolute jack lately. ######


Prompt:
So ever since the protests started my brother (19) has been making racist comments to my family about it. I'm (21) a criminal justice major and have learned a lot about systemic racism so I've been trying to help my family understand what's happening and why. I warned my brother to never say any of the stuff that he says around us to anyone else, but he didn't listen.

Sure enough my brother was "exposed" on a girl's Instagram story with screenshots of him saying racist things in a chat with his friends. Since the girl that posted the screenshots was in my grade my family asked me to talk to her and get her to take it down since it may "ruin my brothers college acceptance." I told my family no and that he needs to be publicly ridiculed since nothing that I've said was going to get through to him.

Then the post spread and now practically everyone has seen the message and has been messaging me about it saying things like "wow I can't believe your brother is so racist" and "wow how can you let him say things like this." In response I posted something saying how I do not condone his actions and am deeply disappointed.

Now my brother says that I am "dead to him" and my family won't talk to me because I didn't back my brother and "betrayed the family." I've asked my brother to sit and talk with me about it but he's refusing to and saying that I've done too much damage and that he doesn't want to speak to me again.

My mom keeps telling me that I need to apologize to him in order to make the family "begin to heal" but I don't feel as though I'm in the wrong.

Should I apologize? Am I the asshole here? ######

Response: NTA. There should never be any sympathy for racists; especially for one who refuses to get educated on the issue ######


Prompt:
So...like, in my mind I don't think I'm an asshole but my family is treating me like I have disowned my father for this so here goes:

Around 2017, I cut all of my hair off. All of it. I stopped getting relaxers and let my hair go natural because I really wanted to try it, and I LOVE it. I have kept my hair short and proper since, and I feel a lot more freer with my hair in it's natural, healthy state.

My father, on the other hand, HATES it. Like, despises it. Everytime he has seen me, for like the past year or so, he has to comment on my hair. I've always been nice about it, laughed off his jokes about it, and kind of shrugged them off, but I'm going to be honest, it's started to piss me off.

Today, I walked into the room where he was, and the first thing he says to me is: "When are you going to let your hair grow out and get a relaxer?" Y'all, I'm on my period and I'm cramping so I just let him have it. I told him that I have agency over my own body and that I like the style so I'm not changing it. He looked at me and laughed, then mocked me like a three year old. He was like "You don't have to be rude," and I'm like, "I'm not being rude, I just don't like you talking about my body and my hair choices. I don't tell you what to do with your hair." He looked over at my mom and was like "Why is she so rude?" and she told me that "I wasn't being nice" and I just...I don't know what to think? He says things about my weight and stuff sometimes too and I very rarely say anything to him but the one time I defend myself...I'm the asshole?

Am I really the asshole or am I just...being a bitch about it? ######

Response:
 NTA. There is only so much badgering a person can take. Sorry he's being such a jerk. It sounds like you were firm and clear and probably pretty annoyed, but you stuck to stating that you found his behavior unacceptable and didn't attack him personally. That's completely reasonable and not rude, especially as a response to extremely rude behavior on his part.

I think the only other thing you can do now is just give him nothing to argue with. I'd just stick to "I've explained that I'm not going to discuss this" and leave the room / end the conversation / stop talking to him. ######


Prompt:
I'm in a dilemma because I don't know if I'm acting like a bitch or if it's best to just keep my distance. I have a cousin that I was very close to growing up but is now, to plainly state the truth, nothing more than white trash.

She has never left her parents house but has continued to produce children for her mom to care for. She's my age and doesn't have a tooth left in her fucking head. She's been arrested numerous times for theft and drug offenses, including meth as well as pain pills. She's no longer welcome in my home because she steals every goddamn thing she can lay her hands on.

Every time I try to help her I'm taken advantage of. As in like, stealing from me, borrowing money and not paying it back, or bumming rides from me, which I started refusing because what if I get pulled over and she has drugs in her possession, in my car? And furthermore, I don't really care to be seen in public with and associated with such a person.

I don't know if I'm being a snotty bitch riding her high horse and looking down on her and others like her or if I'm justified in wanting nothing more to do with her. I try not to judge people but she did it to herself. I'm tired of being stolen from and used. ######

Response:
 NTA. There is nothing wrong with protecting yourself and your immediate family from such a person. You also do not have to set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm. She doesn't want help yet, so anything done at this point outside if getting her to rehab is enabling her poor decisions and it is ok to choose to not support her lifestyle.

People rarely tell you that the "tough" part of tough love is not only on the person who needs the kick in the pants, but also on the one doing the kicking. They often get a lot of flack, especially because of faaaaaaaaaamily. ######


Prompt:
Okay so I am a behavioral therapist for autistic kids. And with COVID and everything going on, sessions have been moved around but haven’t stopped. I have this one kid who we will call John. John is 8 years old and very aggressive. My job with John is to help him understand simple things better like time, patience, social cues, etc. This kid had promise when I started, which was about a month before the pandemic. But as the pandemic continue, his behavior has gotten worse. Session is about 3 1/2 hours. The moment I knock on the door I can hear “I DONT WANT TO DO SESSION!” Now, why doesn’t he want to do session? Because he wants to play roblox and fortnite. That’s all he wants to do. Watch YouTube videos about those games and to play them. It takes about 30-45 minutes to get him to calm down because he doesn’t want therapy. He wants to play roblox and fortnite on his xbox. And when we take it away, he will call his mom a bitch.

Now his poor mother, I feel so bad for her. She just wants what’s best for her kid but all he does is abuse her. She tells me that it’s okay because he doesn’t understand but I can see it’s slowly killing her. She doesn’t sleep at all because every 30 minutes or so, the kid will wake her up in the middle of the night for whatever reasons.

Going through this with the kid every single session has started to get to me. I try my absolute best with all my kids, even my non verbals. I want to help them and make sure they are learning, but this kid. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I’m still doing therapy with him and I will still do what I normally do and try to help him but deep deep down I have given up on him. I feel guilty for feeling like this. So Reddit, AITA? ######

Response: NTA. There is nothing wrong with admitting you can't help someone as a therapist, it doesn't matter that it is a child on the spectrum in this case. If you aren't able to help, the best thing you can do is admit it and help the mother find another therapist who can. You've done your best, it hasn't worked, time to let another therapist try. ######


Prompt:
AITA for refusing to go to my sisters wedding?

This happened almost a year ago, but I’m still getting shit for it, so I guess I’ll share here and see where my judgement lies.

So my sister (s) got married to (A), the man who did bad things to me me. We didn’t press charges because he wore protection so there was no
semen for evidence, so the case was somewhat useless already, and we could afford a lawyer. She knew about this before she dated him. She was the first person I went to. Anyway, they ended up dating and got engaged. S asked me to be her maid of honor, but I told her that there is no way I would go to her wedding, and can’t believe she would marry such a horrible man. We both shed a lot of tears that day, but S still insisted she loved A and that he’d changed.

I ended up not going and severing ties with S. Recently, S had a baby and my parents have been giving me hell for my decision, and refusing to meet my nephew or be in any of their lives. AITA? ######

Response: NTA. There is no situation in which anyone should force you to treat your abuser as family. Sorry you had to go through that! *hug* ######


Prompt:
My husband and I are new homeowners and moved into our first home a little less than a year ago.

We’ve had a rocky relationship with one of our neighbors from the start, an older couple— the husband is pretty chill and kind to us but the wife has been confrontational and made sure when we moved in that we knew exactly where our property ends and theirs begins. We’re in a city and our lots are about 2000 sqft each so we’re talking a matter of inches that she does not want us crossing. When we moved in, other neighbors on the street welcomed us and also warned us about her attitude and nastiness. Basically the point being that honestly I am intimidated by my neighbors and do not want to confront them directly.

They have a fire pit in their backyard that is roughly 20 feet from our house. The weather has been getting nicer so they have been using it for recreational use— just to have a fire going while sitting outside and chatting. Naturally being so close, the smoke comes right into our home so we can’t open windows and we can’t be outside in our own yard without being covered in smoke. It has even set off the smoke detectors in our house if any window is opened a crack.

I checked our local laws and any fire pits require a permit and must be 75 ft away from any structure (which is impossible considering the size of our houses and our small yards), and can only be operated from January to May 1st.

I called the fire department yesterday (anonymously) and within 5 minutes they were there and it was put out. I plan to call the fire department whenever their smoke gets into our house/yard. According to local laws they will probably be fined and prohibited from having it entirely if there are multiple complaints.

WIBTA for calling the fire department as many times as necessary to get my neighbors’ recreational fire pit shut down? ######

Response: NTA. There is a good reason for those fire regulations and includes not letting them burn your house down. That’s it. ######


Prompt: So my sister and her BF recently bought vapes. She bought hers for her own money and I don't care that she's vaping. What I care about, though, is that she vapes in our room (we share a room). So we've gotten in an argument about her vaping here. I really hate the fake fruit smell and it's giving me a headache. AITA? ######

Response: NTA. There are plenty of other places where she can vape without causing you discomfort. ######


Prompt:
Got some degree of background, I (30F) was pregnant and miscarried. I now have to have the left over tissue removed from my body. I was only 9 weeks at the time, but I’m obviously hormonal and I’m sad.

My husband (31M) was never excited about the pregnancy. To be honest, it was unexpected. We have no other children and weren’t planning on it any time soon.

I scheduled the appointment and asked if he was available during that time. He confirmed he was, but as the conversation continued he kept bringing up how he was trying to make plans with a friend who’s in from out of town for that evening. I told him I didn’t want to do that.

He still wants to go hang out with his friend. Am I just hormonal? Or is it reasonable to expect him to be a source of emotional support after that? He just saw this friend two weeks ago. ######

Response:
 NTA. There are going to be drugs in your system and you Will not be in shape to socialize. Additionally, you may need help at home.

This is hardcore basic wedding vows stuff and he should tell his friend it's not a good time. ######


Prompt:
AITA?
TLDR; husband can't stand tattoos and won’t let me get one- I’m about to just do it- but he might just break over it.

Hi, I’m F25 and my husband M25 have a good marriage, we’ve had normal marriage problems but I’d like to think we did a good job resolving them through good communication and positive change. (Four years)

Every few months though, we’ve been having the same fight. I want my first tattoo and he doesn't want me to get one at all. The solution here isn’t as easy as “ f him, be a free independent woman, it’s your body, ect”.

1st problem is one of the positive changes in our marriage is me making an effort to make decisions together instead of alone. (ITA story below)
2nd problem is we are both children from strict Mormon backgrounds- though we aren’t Mormon anymore- a lot of his issue is he was made to believe people with tattoos are trashy, immature and criminals.

I’ve tried to compromise. On his end I can’t get one till I’m 30 (um, ok.. dad?). On my end, it’s got to be something small and where people can’t notice it easily. He thinks if I wait till 30 I won’t want one anymore because mature new moms don’t get first tattoos.

I’m about ready to just do what I want where I want, but I’m also not ready to put a rift in our marriage again. AITA if I get one?

Tattoo: just a black, thin line contour of a violet, it’s stem and 1-3 leaves on the end behind my ankle bone.

ITA story: I really wanted a dog he never did- he told me no but told me I could still do it- but it was a feeling of betrayal when I chose to get a puppy. I admit it was selfish, but I wish it didn’t make him feel like I didn’t love him/respect him. He resented me for three months even when he gained real love for that dog after one. ######

Response:
 NTA. There are decisions that as a married couple, a partner is not allowed to make unilaterally. Finances, large purchases, etc. Anything in relation to your own body does NOT fall under that category. Wait until you're thirty? WTF? That is utterly ludicrous, condescending and frankly borderline misogynistic (like you need Daddy's permission as you said). You cannot control what another person wishes to do with their body. Haircuts, hair colors, piercings, tattoos, shaving preferences, cosmetics--these are interpersonal decisions only. The ONLY reason I could see someone saying 'hey let's think about this TOGETHER' is if for example your employer says 'no visible ink or you're fired' and you get a huge face tattoo OR if it is offensive like a swastika. Otherwise--your body, your choice, period. It is controlling--there is no other word for it--controlling to tell a partner what body modifications they can have unless the special circumstances I listed above. Then a spouse has a right to RAISE AN OBJECTION but ultimately the decision is YOURS ALONE.

I cannot stress this enough--a partner, spouse, significant other CANNOT make a unilateral decision about **your** body. Only you can. For someone to try and overstep that boundary is very much getting into 'domestic control' territory. Nope. He cannot make that decision for you--he can only have an opinion about it.

Edit: The puppy thing has no bearing as you are not asking about judgment for that. That is a TOGETHER decision, so you did wrong there, but you are not asking for judgment on that action, just your tattoo. ######


Prompt:
We are muslims and unlike them, I sorta neglect my religious tasks. Sometimes I don’t pray, and sometimes I’m not fasting in this ramadan. So basically, after each feast, my roommates go pray together, and they ask me to join them. I prayed with them before but yesterday and the day before I said nah, I’ll pray by myself (in reality I don’t want to pray cuz I’m lazy), and when I said so, they get annoyed as if I did something rude. One of them even told me that dude cmon pray so you can enter heaven, and so god doesnt punish you. Mate I get it but don’t push me like this or at least be indifferent about me, it’s my problem.

Bonus: When I was living with my family before moving to college, they didn’t enforce me to be completely religious. They told me to do it on if I’m willing to. No matter how much I skipped prayer, they never shamed me for it. ######

Response: NTA. Them trying to enforce their religious practices upon you makes them TA. ######


Prompt:
 My roommates (21-22F) and I (21F) were tanning in our backyard when my neighbor (N) peeked over our fence to ask about the beehive he found near our garage. Right then, beekeepers (B1/B2) showed up and asked to use our driveway so I left to move my car.

N and B1 then started making sexual comments about my roommate (R) saying they’re only here to "look at the view" and that her bathing suit was "too skimpy". When I came back, my roommates told me what happened and how both men scoffed when R called them out.

My roommates begged me to not say anything but I was pissed. I told the men "The comments you made were not okay. You made a group of young women feel so uncomfortable they no longer feel safe in their own backyard. I don't care if you *think* you did nothing wrong, at the end of the day you made comments towards a 21 year old girl that made her feel unsafe. You would be pissed if some stranger did this to your daughter so learn from your mistakes and don't do it again."

N and B1 tried to apologize but they said “sorry if my words were misconstrued” and I kinda lost my shit. I said "I won’t accept an apology in which you take NO responsibility for your actions. You know what you said and you know it's wrong. I don't care you're from a different generation, you know making sexual comments towards a 21 year old is gross. Think about your behavior, understand why it was wrong, and never do it again."

I'm concerned I took it too far by denying their apologies. My dad said I should have let it go sooner and not pushed the issue. AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA. Their saying, "Sorry YOU misconstrued the creepy things I said" isn't an apology, and no one misconstrued anything.

It would have been creepy and inappropriate if they were 24 and stood there making those comments, let alone any other age. Just be careful. There are some pretty big weirdos in the world who don't like getting called out, no matter how justified it was. ######


Prompt: My 3 best friends and I were on our way to the beach earlier today, when my friend who was driving (K) was pulled over for speeding. She has never been pulled over before so she was freaking out a bit thinking the ticket was going to be like $400 and immediately told us we would be splitting this ticket four ways. My friend S basically told her no we wouldn’t be splitting the ticket as we weren’t the ones speeding K was. I agreed  with my friend S that we shouldn’t have to split the ticket. It ended up being a $190 ticket. I told my parents when I got home and they called me an asshole for not splitting the ticket. We had already agreed to pay for gas and are actually now paying $20 each which was a lot more than it should be as a “sorry you got pulled over” bonus but I am now mixed on if AITA or not. ######

Response: NTA. Their lead foot was what caused them to get pulled over. Can't blame that on anyone else ######


Prompt:
I logged my mom's Netflix account on my dad's house (they're divorced) so that me and my brother could watch a movie.

Today I went to the living room and my dad's friends were watching Netflix in my mom's profile and didn't stop even after a told them that.

I called my mom and told her what was going on and she told me we should change the password and since she doesn't know how to do it, I did it.

Obviously after that the series my dad's friends were watching stopped working and asked for the new password, they started asking me what was going on and I pertended I didn't know.

They called my dad and he told me to call my mom (I didn't because I had just talked to her).

Now they are all bummed out about it and I feel kinda bad AITA? ######

Response: NTA. Their boredom is not your problem. You did what your mom wanted you to do. Your dad can get his own netflix account to entertain his friends. ######


Prompt:
I’m 19F, I have a brother who is 22M. My Dad is a really complicated guy and incredibly difficult to get along with. My Dad and my Mom have a terrible relationship, I seriously feel like they hate each other. My Dad and I don’t have a great relationship either, especially because he said a lot of hurtful things to me when I was younger. My brother doesn’t talk to my Dad.

My Mom was talking to me about her favorite subject: my Dad, and how awful their relationship is, and how damaging the relationship has been to her. She said, “when you and your brother were much younger, I went to a therapist and talked about divorcing Dad. And the therapist told me that I was trapped in the relationship because I had children. I would have divorced him and had my own life if not for that.”

This kind of pissed me off. I don’t know what she was trying to say to me. I said, “how do you think I’m supposed to respond to that?” She acted confused and said, “I thought we were just having a conversation.” I don’t remember exactly what I told her after that but it was basically, “it’s not okay to openly tell me that my brother and I are responsible for your unhappiness.” Then I hung up.

I don’t know how to feel after this fight. My Mom and I fight extremely rarely. AITA? Did I take it too personal? ######

Response: NTA. The whole dynamic is messed up, actually. She's treating you as a friend with no part in the conflict while constantly telling you terrible things about your own father. And then, implicitly, she blames you for it, even though it was her choice to have children, not yours.  You were concise and direct and handled this really well, all things considered. ######


Prompt:
Gonna keep this short.

My girlfriend called me a "tan" yesterday. She said it in a really joking way, mimicking that John Mulaney line ("that's what I thought you'd say, you fucking tan"), and it quite took me aback, because I knew her friends used words like that but she had mentioned her father found it tasteless so it surprised me that she used it.

When I pulled her up on it, saying I didn't like that word, she justified it by calling it a joke and then said it was ironic I was trying to control the words she used to describe "the oppressor" and then finally said she couldn't help it if "your tannery was so apparent" or something?

It has become something of a recurring thorn in our relationship, given she often justifies not getting along with someone or finding it difficult to talk to them by saying they are "too English" for her to relate to them or labels petty frustrations as "the Brits getting to me". I get that they're jokes, but she just seems so dismissive and irritated towards all things "tan".

I ended up asking her if she needed people to be just like her in order to get along with them, and in the course of our short discussion I ended up saying it sounded like she was a xenophobe. She's brought that up again quite a few times since and I get the impression I quite hurt her feelings, but honestly I think I was justified in what I said given the context and what she had just said. ######

Response: NTA. The whole “is it or isn’t it racist/xenophobic?” question isn’t really the point. We could debate that all day, and —let’s be real — this sub probably will. What is relevant is that your gf continues to insult and “joke” with you even after you get expressed that it’s hurtful to you, and then when you had a serious conversation about how those words made you feel, instead of listening, she made herself the victim. That’s not healthy relationship behavior. ######


Prompt:
My cat eats meals and only gets a certain amount of food a day. He acts like he’s starving all the time. I even brought him to the vet and the vet said he was the perfect weight and he wasn’t sick, he just likes to eat. And if he ate more he would be fat.

My family thinks that the cat is not getting enough to eat. They try to sneak him food behind my back. I tell him he’s getting plenty to eat but they say it’s cruel to leave a cat feeling this hungry, he’s begging food off people and looking for food all the time. They think he should be eating more, at least another can of food at lunchtime, and again I’m being cruel to him and not giving him what his body needs.

AITA? ######

Response: NTA. The vet said he is fine and that's what matters. Cats can be very good at begging for treats, mine will beg from anyone eating in a way that makes you think they haven't eaten in days, even when there is a bowl of cat food in the next room that they are ignoring. ######


Prompt:
I'll try to keep it short. I was using my boss's personal truck for a 4-month long work project. He's the President of the company. That project ended at the end of January. I got quotes before the end of the project on getting it shipped back to him because I knew he'd put it off and I'd get stuck with his truck and a bunch of work equipment, and I wanted to avoid that.

But he just brushed the quotes off and I got stuck with it anyway. He lives 13 hours away from me btw. 8 weeks go by and due to world events, we can't get any work. I get laid off. During that call when he's laying me off I tell him he needs to make arrangements to get his truck and the equipment back. He says he'll work on it. After another lie about when I'll be receiving my last check (no severance), I had to wait 6 days from being laid off to get the last of my pay and expenses reimbursed. At this point, I've had his truck for 9 weeks, and he's made no attempt to come to get it.

I don't want his truck parked in front of my house anymore. I email him and tell him he has 14 days to get his truck, or arrange for it to be shipped, or I'm going to take it up to the airport, and valet park it so it can be locked and the equipment kept safe, and he can retrieve it when he's ready.

He never emailed me back, but I did see an email he sent another coworker about it, and apparently he doesn't understand why I just won't hold onto his truck and the equipment for a few more months and I've got a bad attitude. and if they got work again he couldn't see bringing me back because he couldn't work with someone in the future who had this kind of attitude.

he's got two days left. but I've not been contacted by him.

so, am I the asshole? ######

Response: NTA. The title made it sound like a revenge thing, but it sounds like you've repeatedly given him opportunities to arrange pick up of the truck and, when that failed, warnings that you're going to leave it at the airport. If he's not an idiot, he'll contact you in the next 48 hours. If he is an idiot, you're NTA for following through. ######


Prompt:
I am a 15 year old  boy with three siblings.  One of them is a girl. For the longest time me and my brothers 14 and 13 had to share a room and my sister always got her own separate room. The girl is 12 years old. Now that we are moving in with our mom new husbands my mom promised me that I would finally get my own room.

The other two boys are happy because they get more space and those boys are best friends. My sister is obviously gets her own room cause she is girl. So when we moved in we realized that it's a three bedroom house and my mom lied. Us boys are furious as we have to share the small room and my sister gets the second largest and my parents the master. The room is enough to fit us and our stuff has to go in the attic to make space.

This is a huge issue as none of us kids are going to have a proper area to study and we are fucked if one of us has a nightmare and screams in the middle of the night which was an issue in the past. I complained and tried asked my mom if we wear going to have at least the master bedroom in which she refused and told me it's my husband and mine room then told me that you should be grateful that you are having a place to stay and sleep as the homeless person don't even have a house to sleep in ######

Response: Nta. The three boys should get the largest room, parents the second largest and sister the smallest. You mum is a complete ass for lying to you ######


Prompt:
We need social work credits to continue our studies. I used to go to an autism centre every week to help around, and everything was ok until the pandemic started.

Having no way to access the usual centers, and school being online, the teacher that is in charge of the social work decided that instead of postponing some stuff, or even extending our second year’s social work a bit, we should all donate a pantry each.

And I know it could help a lot of people. 100 pantries are a nice help... but many people can’t even afford their own food, their families not having a job because of quarantine. It doesn’t affect me as much, but it’s still quite a lot of money that is going out of my wallet, money which I could really use this quarantine.

They didn’t even consider other options for a second. They just stated that we had to do it, and if we don’t, good luck working for the school if you want to graduate.

Oh, also? It isn’t even as if they made the announcement and gave us some time to sort things out. They simply dropped in, told us to go to school to give the pantries on Monday, and it’s been complete radio silence since then. ######

Response: NTA. The teachers hearts are in the right places but you are 100% correct that not everyone can afford food for themselves, let alone someone else. Have you emailed this concern to your professors or dean? I assume so since you said there’s been radio silence. ######


Prompt:
Ive been rooming with my sister for 2 years now, and I’ve been having an issue since she moved in. She has a friend who smells AWFUL. Like hasn't bathed in weeks, ran through an onion field awful... who she has spend the night regularly. I cannot stress how bad this guy smells. He walks in to my house and his BO literally smacks you in the face. I cant even walk by my sisters bedroom door without gagging.

Anyways. Every time he comes over, she allows him to sleep on my living room couch, and i swear I can smell him on it weeks after he’s left. I’ve asked her before to get him a cheap air mattress if she wants him to spend the night, which she did, but they popped it on the first night And she has yet to replace it. (I’ve asked multiple times)

I’m at the point where I’m about to tell her that he can’t stay anymore. He’s ruining MY furniture with his stench. Any time I try to bring it up to her, she just says “You’ll survive” AITA for asking her to not have her friend spend the night anymore??

Note: He’s been told by multiple people that he stinks, and he doesn’t seem to care. Her tellong him won’t solve anything. ######

Response:
 NTA. The smell of stale ass, weeks of sweat, no deodorant use, not washing sweaty clothes and sour milk just lingers and lingers. (I've been around people who have smelt that bad) and it's horrible.

God I already wanna get some air freshener for your house and just spray down everything.

But yeah if it's your house you're allowed to tell people to not come over.

Also tell her she can pay you for the new air mattress and the laundry detergent and stuff it's costing you to wash and probably re wash all your stuff. ######


Prompt:
Me and my sister (both 17, I'm her brother) made an agreement one day when my parents weren't home. I'd invite whatever friend I have that my sister thinks is the hottest, and she'd invite whatever friend of her's that I think is the hottest. Then we'd all go skiny dipping. It was mostly so we could see someone we each find hot naked, and possibly we'd each hook up with that person after.

We invited them over, all went skiny dipping, and then got out. She hooked up with my friend and I hooked up with her friend in each of our bedrooms. My sister is open with her mom about sexuality so she told my mom all of this. My mom was cool with it until she realized me and my sister went skiny dipping together. Our parents think its very weird and inappropriate for me and my sister to skiny dip together and see each other naked.

Neither of us cared and we focused on the other people in the pool. My parents are really mad, but only because me and my sister skiny dipped with each other and were nude in front of each other. ######

Response: NTA. The sibling nudity thing is a bit odd, but your collective scheme is genius. ######


Prompt:
My sister unfortunately passed away suddenly recently and there will be a funeral soon. Unfortunately, though, because of the Rona situation, the EU commission decided to ban Americans and later most of hte world from entering the EU unless they have valid business or diplomatic reasons to be here. Mostly its some sort of visa or residence permit and at the moment my visa is expired, and  I am in the process of trying to get a residence permit. I live and study in Poland.

Almost all of my family is fucking pissed i wont go back to the US for the funeral but I cant. If i leave, I cannot reenter hte EU. I have explained this concept so many times to some of these thickskulled dumbasses who still don't understand. Others are saying I'm selfish for this. If i can't reenter the EU i can't continue my studies here.

I've suggested of other things i could do, i could skype or watch a live stream of the funeral or something, i want to go but i can't. I had a massive argument with some of my relatvies after explainign this the 5th time to him and i ended up cursing him out. ######

Response:
 NTA. The rules about limited travel are to protect lives,  it would be a terrible irony if you were to somehow spread a fatal disease in order to attend a funeral.

If you are okay with not going then it is your choice. Sorry for your loss OP. ######