Prompt:
TL DR: regardless of how you feel about the covid quarantine, my husband was secretly going to bars. He didn’t tell anyone in our family including his elderly high risk parents who came to visit on Father’s Day because they thought we had been staying at home, so I told him he had to call them and tell them the truth before they came back over this afternoon.

So, we’ve been married for 7 years, have 2 toddlers, and my husband still doesn’t seem to understand his actions affect other people. We’ve been quarantining since March, but he is “essential” so his work schedule has been normal. On Father’s Day his parents (both over 70yrs old) came over for the 1st time to surprise him and we all sat down and ate together since they felt it was an acceptable minimal risk since he only goes to work.
Well, I saw text messages last night that he’s been going to bars with friends after work.

I’m upset that he’s been lying to me, and I don’t know what to do about that.
I’m upset that he’s possibly been putting our family’s health at risk, and I don’t know what to do about that.
I’m also upset that his elderly parents were here because we told them we were safe, and apparently that was a lie, so I told him to call them and tell them he lied or else I would.

He said I’m an asshole for dragging them into our business. He lied to them too. I think that is their business. His dad is supposed to come over again today-I think he deserves to know the truth in order to reevaluate the risk before coming over.

I think I’m protecting our vulnerable parents and children. He says I’m an asshole trying to control everyone, be he’s also already established he’s willing to lie to get what he wants. Am I the asshole? ######

Response: NTA.  You’re not trying to “control” anyone. You’re making sure everyone has ALL the information so they can reassess and make their own decisions, which is how it should be. His parents have the right to know he’s been around more people than was originally assumed so they can decide if they want to continue coming over, or wait it out. ######


Prompt:
Throwaway just in case.

I (18F) live with my mom, who has primary custody, and my step dad who has been in my life for 12 years and who I see as a father.

Throughout my childhood I didnt have a great relationship with my biological father. I both enjoyed and hated going to his house. Enjoyed because I had a lot more freedom there, hated because I had no friends.  Not to mention that when I got a phone my mom wouldn't let me take it to his house because she didn't want him to know I had a phone.

All my life I've been told stories on both sides and I nevee knew who to believe. Contact with my biological father slowed to the point where I would barely talk to him once every two months. Until, a few months ago  he sent me a letter with his phone number saying that if I ever need anything, he will be there.

My mom told me he is just trying to play victim and act like he's being kept from me, and that he doesn't actually mean it. I still called him, from my phone and without her knowing, and he was overjoyed to hear from me. Since then we've been rebuilding our relationship.

Now here's the part where I might be TA. My mom, Step Dad and I have been fighting on where I'm going to go to college. They do not approve of my choice or my intended career that I already have a job. There has been screaming, name calling, and constant silent treatement the past six months. Despite the fact that I am paying for college myself and have a viable way of financing it.

And so, I want to move in with my dad, who does support me and my choices. Obviously, my mom will be devastated, because she's always told me how hard she's worked to keep him from hurting me like he did to her. And I know by moving my step dad will never forgive me. I just can't take feeling like an enemy in my own house anymore. AITA? ######

Response: NTA.  You’re 18.  They don’t have custody of you anymore.  You’re an adult.  Go do what you want. ######


Prompt:
Its late at night so I'm gonna keep this short.

Background: Recently, I've been constipated (really embarrassing but is important) Idk why, but I have been. I started taking medicine to help this, and this has worked for the most part.

Story: So earlier today I went down to the kitchen to take a break from Terraria (checking out the 1.4 update) and to have some coffee. I was making it when I overheard my younger brother. (His room is in the basement.) My brother is trying to become a Twitch streamer with some of his friends and was talking with his buddies. I mainly tune it out but a word slips into my head.

THE NAME OF THE MEDICINE I TAKE FOR CONSTIPATION.

I IMMEDIATELY head down, and ask wtf he's talking about. He's like "bruh chill," while I'm furious that he's talking about MY PRIVATE INFORMATION on stream. (To be fair, he has zero followers. That's not an exaggeration, he literally has 0 followers, but that doesn't change anything.) I explode but mainly stay passive. I spill some sprinkles on his floor but nothing much. I tell my mother as it's mainly her job to manage my brother and she goes nuts. She IMMEDIATELY brings him into a conversation. He realizes that he's in the wrong and comes up to my room and apologize with my mom in the background.

I don't accept.

It was only a few hour difference from when it happened to when he apologized, I feel like this is just another one of his apologies and he'll go straight back to being a jerk (which is what usually happens) and I get the impression that he's only saying that because my mom is making him. So I don't accept. He gets pissed and runs straight out and my mom kinda gives me a dirty look. So reddit, AITA? ######

Response: NTA.  You're under no obligation to accept anybody's apology especially if it's not genuine. ######


Prompt:
My mother wants me to stay with her even when I'm older, because I'm 'not ready' to live on my own. I can cook and know how to wash clothes and dishes. I know which items to buy at the store. Heck, I even know how to take care of hangovers so I should be able to help my friend if she ever has one.

What my mom really wants me to do is to take care of her. All of my life I've been taking care of my mother, even though she's not even sick. When I was younger, I would nurse her hangovers even while being sick.

I know how to take care of myself. Me and my bestfriend have been planning this ever since we've met 3 years ago. As soon as I graduate or turn 19, I'll move in with her without telling my mom. The reason I won't tell my mom is because if I do, she'll try to make me stay.

I've been keeping a lot of anger in me because my mother never listens to me. Every time I try to voice my opinion she threatens to disconnect my phone and take it away because surely that's where I'm getting my attitude. And I'm just so tired from having to take care of her even when she's perfectly able to do it herself.

She always makes promises that she never keeps, even if it might kill her. And it's just so draining to make sure that she doesn't die in the middle of the night from drinking so much. I'm tired of being the mother in this relationship.

So Reddit,  WIBTA if I go through with this the way I planned to? ######

Response: NTA.  You're supposed to be the kid not the parent to your parent.  Before you move or tell your mom, make sure you have all of your important documents that you will need (birth certificate,  social security card, diploma. Etc.) So that your mom can't hold it over you to prevent you from leaving. ######


Prompt:
This happened a few months ago, but my brain won't let this one go.

So I was hanging out with some friends. Two guys, one woman. We're all in our early 20s and have had our fair share of romance in life. The topic of sex popped up and we start talking about some of our past experiences. One guy joked about how having sex only made his dick bigger and bigger. We all laughed and he said that he wished that's how it works. My female friend (let's call her Sarah) piped up and said "Yeah, for women, it's the complete opposite. The more sex you have, the bigger your labia gets and the looser you become." There were some chuckles, but then I asked her if she was serious. She said she was.

Now, this is a big myth. I was surprised a woman who has had some experience actually believes that. I basically told her this, and then she started getting annoyed, asking "how me and my dick knows about that". I said the same way I know anything about female anatomy- I've read up on it. The whole "women get looser" thing is something sexist dudes made up to slut-shame women. My other friends were silent on this. She then just said: "Whatever, I'm not in the mood for this kind of mansplaining."

So I'm at a loss here. AITA for explaining something that I feel like people should just know about? ######

Response: NTA.  You're right, she's not, simple as that.  Just because you know more about female anatomy than she does doesn't make it sexist.  I always took "mansplaining" as a guy automatically assuming a woman knows less about a topic because of her gender.  I've had this done to me over computers parts before, and it drove me nuts.  However, you weren't assuming her knowledge based on her gender, you were correcting her on something very wrong, and as as you said, pretty sexist.  I don't see anything wrong there. ######


Prompt:
Okay so I have a cat. Her name is Kitty, she's a beautiful little crossbreed and my entire life revolves around her. When she passes, I genuinely don't know how I'll cope.

Anyway, my sister also has a cat. His name is Taz, and she loves him more than life itself. She's autistic, and he's very very good with it. Sensory overload? He'll calm her down immediately. She's crying? He'll nuzzle her and often times grab my parents for her. But he's also very fat. And they just keep feeding him. My sister is obsessed with him, and she will feed him whatever he wants. She doesn't understand that she's hurting him, and I don't want to upset her by telling her.

My parents know. Taz's breathing is getting awful, he can't just very well, and despite his young age can't play for more than five minutes without needing a rest.

I'm genuinely worried for his health, and my parents also feed him whatever he wants, and they do the same with my cat. She has her own medical problems, that will probably shorten her life span. I don't want to make it any shorter.

I have told them that they're killing him by feeding him constantly. They tell me I'm being cruel, and just trying to scare my sister, which is literally the opposite of what I'm doing. They also refuse to stop feeding my cat when she wants it. She looses weight stupidly fast, so it's not too dangerous, but still worries me.

They said if I'm so worried, I can just up Kitty's exercise (which I am doing), and that I need to stop worrying about Taz because he's 'fine'.

I don't want my sister to loose her life line quicker than she has to, but apparently I'm just worrying about nothing because he's only 'a little' overweight.

He doesn't look that big, but he's gaining, and fast.

So, AITA?

(Once again, I'm awful with wording so just ask if I don't make any sense.) ######

Response:
 NTA.  You're right, but damn if it isn't difficult to curb behaviour like this when it's coming from your parents.   I'm sorry to say that I've been through this twice, and there was no real solution.  Because realistically you can't monitor the cats 24 hours a day, then your parents are going to continue to do whatever the hell they want.  Which sucks.

The only action you can really take is to try to have the advice come from someone other than you.  I'm talking about the vet - if you can call ahead of the next appointment to express your concerns, maybe the vet will take a harder line with them.  But even then, nothing is guaranteed, as I'm sure this is always discussed at vet appointments anyway (my vet shows no mercy!).

I don't know anything about people with autism, but from what I do understand, routine is super important, right?  Could you frame it that establishing a daily routine with the cat could be super helpful for your sister in the long run?  I don't know, just spitballing here.  Sorry you're faced with this, it's super common and very frustrating I know. ######


Prompt:
Some background: FIL is a man who doesn't get along with his wife and children. He barks and snaps at everyone but is cordial to me and eats out of my daughter's hand.

During this stay home period, MIL started cleaning out stuff that's been sitting around the house. Yesterday she found in a seldom-used drawer, a wooden box with a handkerchief wrapped around a picture of FIL in his younger times and my daughter's recent picture he cut out from her year book.

When she asked him about it, he threw a fit and said she had no right to defile pictures of people he loved most. An upset MIL called and told me about it.

He has 3 grandsons and 3 granddaughters. While I'm happy he dotes on my daughter most, I found this really creepy and said this to hubby. Hubby is now upset that I think his dad is creepy and his childless sister sides with him, while the other sister who has 3 kids thinks FIL is crazy.

So am I TA for reading too much into his 'innocent' action? ######

Response: NTA.  You'd be TA if you ignored this.  Because that's why child abuse so often goes on for years - people believe their beloved father/uncle/grandfather/cousin would NEVER do that awful thing, so they ignore red flags.  Cutting out the picture of one of six grandkids from her yearbook, placing it in some sort of shrine and then being angry when someone touches it is a red flag.  Your MIL also obviously believes there's a problem or she wouldn't have mentioned it.  You need to think about how you can protect your daughter.  A visit with a therapist might be a first step here. ######


Prompt:
Some people at my school signed a contract to rent a club house for prom and decided to go full out (litteraly no specifics from them), the problem is is that they demand 190$ from everyone (150 people) but almost no one paid except the organizers friend's and they almost got sued for not paying.
I really don't want to go since i don't like a lot of people there, im single and have no interest in anyone in this school and my friends dont plan to go either, AmITheAsshole?( To clarify i did not sigh any contract) ######

Response: NTA.  You signed no contract and I assume that you never consented to the payment verbally, either.  I think you're good to go. ######


Prompt:
Obligatory throwaway so men don’t message me about my tits on my regular account + I’m on mobile, so sorry if formatting is weird.

So, the other day one of my flatmates (with whom I have, up until this point, had neither a positive nor negative relationship with) sent me this long text that started with “we need to talk about the laundry situation.” This was a bit confusing, since I wasn’t aware of any particular laundry situation. The rest of the text was her telling me that I need to keep my bras out of the laundry room because apparently, when she had her boyfriend over, he went in there and saw my bras hanging up to dry on the drying rack, and was so shocked?intrigued?whatever that he checked the fucking tags (I have no idea if this is normal male behavior, but it creeped me out to read) to see the size, and then “wouldn’t stop talking about it.”

I responded with, basically, “then tell your boyfriend to keep his hands off my shit and shut up.” Flatmate did not consider this an adequate response, and told me that I should keep my “pornstar bras” in my room because it’s apparently inappropriate to dry them in the laundry room. At this point I was quite annoyed; I don’t wear “pornstar bras,” I just have very large breasts, and they’re a literal constant source of annoyance and back pain. The bras in question were totally normal, but apparently them being a UK 34H makes them inappropriate. I told her that I’m not going to try to dry my bras in my room since it’s tiny and we have a perfectly good drying rack in the laundry room, which is for laundry, and that both she and her boyfriend needed to get over it and grow up. I know that this wasn’t terribly diplomatic, but I felt like she was much ruder than I was. I didn’t really think about it the next day, but now it’s been three days and she’s completely ignoring me, so I’m wondering if I misjudged the situation. AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA.  You said it yourself, her bf needs to keep his hands off your shit and she needs to grow up.  It sounds like she reacting out of jealousy or insecurity.  You have bigger breasts than her and her boyfriend won't shut up about it.

It's not your responsibility to deal with and navigate their relationship issues or boundaries (or lack thereof). ######


Prompt:
I (22, F) currently work as an EMT, and as part of my certification, I learned to deliver babies. On occasion, we will get calls to pick up someone whos in labor. I've gotten these calls about 3x and each time we have just transported the patient to the hospital and they have given birth there.

My sister (26, F) who is 8.5 months pregnant recently asked if I could deliver her baby at her home since I was certified. She wants to do it at home since the hospital in our area (Chicago) won't let family visit, and she wants us to be there since this is her first child. Also, her gynecologist is sick and wouldn't be there to deliver her child, so she's also nervous about having a doctor, she doesn't know.

I told her I would get back to her, but my sister and my mom keep texting me about it. Idk what to do, I'm really nervous about doing it since I have never delivered a baby before. She said the baby was perfectly healthy which is good and it obviously won't be premature but I'm still on the fence. ######

Response:
 NTA.  You really aren't qualified as an obstetrician, you are qualified to pitch in to deliver a baby in an emergency.  You aren't even qualified as a midwife.  Your sister would not be getting optimal care and neither would the baby.

There are dozens of ways a delivery can go wrong, with catastrophic results for either mother or infant.  One benefit of hospital birth is that they have all the emergency backup systems needed, from a surgical suite, to monitors, to  sophisticated imaging, to ICU and NICU rooms, laboratory, and all the necessary medications.

Bear in mind if something DOES go wrong, you will feel a burden of guilt personally forever, and so might your family members.  The wise thing to do is to refuse, giving your reasons and standing firm. ######


Prompt:
I'm sorry if this is long or confusing but I'm conflicted.

Backstory my mom was incredibly abusive to me. Everything except sexually because I got that from someone else. I was forced to work at our store when I was 8 years old. Every way you could abuse someone she did it. I moved out when I was 14. I had just finished my freshman year of high school and I moved in with my grandma who let me stay with her rent free but I was on my own for everything. I got a job working 20-30 hours paid under the table. I did everything I could to support and sustain myself. When I turned 16 I got a real job went to an alternative high school and shifted my whole life so I could work and go to school just so I could eat, have a phone, get a car/gas.

We're Asian though. Painfully traditional and our beliefs is that we need to everything we can for our inner circle. Basically my mom was living with my grandma and her husband doesn't like her so he left. Shortly after she left to be with him. Things happened and now they're essentially homeless while looking for a place to live. They're living in a trailer.

I can give more details if there are questions.

Fast forward to now ten years later. I don't have a relationship with my mother. We talk a maybe a total of 5 times a year if that. My whole life I've been lectured how because she's my mother I have to love her and care. She's the only mother I have. I live in moderately sized home with my SO and dog. We have the space to house 2-3 extra people. I feel so bad because I know she wants  me to offer her our extra rooms but I just don't want to.

Shes essentially homeless though and I feel like I'm the devil for not offering her a roof when I have the space and ability to. I don't think I'm TA but why do I feel so bad?  I'm conflicted. If I wasn't TA I don't feel like I would feel bad. ######

Response:
 NTA.  You feel bad because you have certain beliefs drilled into you and they're creating cognitive dissonance - two conflicting sets of thoughts that are giving you stress because you're struggling to resolve them.

Your 'mother' is not a mother.  She did not give you love and support, she gave you nothing but abuse and stress.  Now she demands your love and support unconditionally because it's convenient for her.  She deserves none of it, and no amount of 'but tradition' is going to change that.  Devote your time, attention, and care to the people who care about you are a positive force in your life.  And if anyone gives you crap about it, tell them to shove off, it's not their choice to make.

Sometimes the hardest person to convince is yourself, though.  Keep at it, and keep remembering that she never brought you any good and that's not going to change now. ######


Prompt:
Me and my boyfriend recently (6 months ago) moved in to our first property together, in which we have a spare bedroom that we agreed to rent out to a friend of mine who has never left home, let's call her M. For some context I have been friends with M for almost 20 years, always pretty tight and open with each other.

6 months down the line her boyfriend has asked her to move in with her, not great timing as my father has just been in a car accident which nearly took his life and I was also up for redundancy, but if this is what will make her happy then I'm fine with it. Took a couple of weeks for them to find a place and we found someone to take her room who we trust. Now all we needed to do was organise the moving date.

Now I repeatedly ask M to provide me her moving date and she first said September, then end of August and finally the beginning of August. I needed a solid date to provide my new tenant for their move, so I had a verbal agreement with M that if I wasnt provided a date by july 14th, that her moving date would be set to august the 1st. This mean i can give my new tenant a set date as they desperately need one.

Now M decides to go to france for a 2 week holiday and does not provide me with a moving date so it's set to august 1st. 3 days ago she informs me through Facebook messenger (whilst upstairs in the same house) she wont be able to move until august 8th. I tell her this isnt really acceptable, we had an agreement and the date must stay as august 1st due to commitments I have made with other people.

After calling me unfair and saying she did everything she could have done in the situation, which I feel isnt true, she has not spoken to me since. She immediately started to pack her things and move out, including taking an mattress that belongs to my mum without asking and called me pathetic when I asked for its return. AITM for expecting her to move out a week early? ######

Response: NTA.  You didn't expect her to move out a week early, you expected her to move out on August 1, the date originally provided.  She's the one who tried to change that to August 8.  I guess M isn't as good a friend as you thought she was - she doesn't seem to respect others' needs or property. ######


Prompt: Ok from the title it seems like I \[18M\] wouldn't, but I'm still not sure. She \[18F\] has been hitting on me for a few days, giving me obvious hints that she wants to have sex with me. She has done something similar a few years ago and I told her that I wasn't interested because she doesn't attract me. Yes, yes I know, personality > physical appearance, but at least I admit that I do care about appearance. She and some of my friends started calling me out, telling me that I should've at least gave her a chance. I actually lost one friendship because of that lmao, she was good with my friend. I don't like to hurt people. If I give her a chance now, she will get what she wants, she might get attached to me and I might not, which might hurt her even more. I recently got out of a relationship, I don't feel like getting in something else for now. I still miss ex a lot, but that's a story for another time. I don't enjoy talking to her. I am very insecure, and I don't like when some of my friends start talking about what I should have done and what I should have not done. That's why I'm asking you because I told some of them and they are telling me that I would be an idiot if I miss this opportunity and asshole because I will hurt her. So.. WIBTA? ######

Response: NTA.  You aren't interested in her.  End of story. ######


Prompt:
I have a house I rent, and some of my neighbors have complaints about the property and it's maintenance.

I rent partially because I don't have the time to do the maintenance and I wanted a lease that put the landlord in charge of all that. And that's what I found; my landlord is responsible for all maintenance and landscaping and such.

He lives a few states over and sends guys he knows for maintenance.

Anyway, some of my neighbors have used me as a scapegoat for things they don't like about the house. What's grown in the yard, how it's an eyesore, how the siding needs to be washed.

I've said that they can tell my landlord about it.

They've gotten mad saying that if I live somewhere I should take some pride in it and do the bare minimum to make it presentable. I said that I picked a place where someone else was in charge of landscaping and stuff for a reason, and they really ought to call him or write him a letter or something.

They've all been pretty mad at me and I feel like there just mad because they can't get in touch with the landlord and I'm an easy target because I'm right there.

AITA for not having any more time to listen to that stuff and just saying to call the landlord? ######

Response: NTA.  You are paying your landlord to take care of maintenance and landscaping.  Give them his number and go to town, otherwise leave you alone. ######


Prompt:
Throwaway account for this one.
My partner has two children with his ex-wife, two boys aged 4 and 7, of whom we share custody with their mother.
Here is where I might be the asshole:
The children’s mother has recently become very Catholic, enrolling the eldest in a Catholic school and introducing regular prayer in her home. My partner and I are not at all religious. He’s not religious because he simply isn’t interested, I’m not religious because I was raised Catholic and have become quietly anti-Catholic church as more and more has come to light about child abuse within the church. I say quietly anti-Catholic because whilst I hold my own beliefs, I don’t push them on anyone else. However, my partner’s ex-wife has told us that she wishes for the children to pray at night before bed when they are staying with us and I’ve told her absolutely no. Both of the children have indicated that they find praying to be something of a chore and I would, in all honesty, prefer my house to be religion-free. My partner’s ex-wife is pretty angry with my refusal, saying I shouldn’t care about them praying if I’m not religious and that I should respect her religion, but I don’t think I should have to do something in my house that I don’t want to do and she should be respecting my lack of religion.
AITA?
TLDR; partner’s ex-wife (very religious) wants kids to pray at my house, I (not religious) said no, AITA. ######

Response: NTA.  You are not stopping the children from praying, but you are not forcing them.  By the way, what a terrible way to encourage faith. ######


Prompt:
Ok so before i go into to much detail my boyfriend texted me that he’s looking for a transfer 10 hours away and wants to get an apartment. This aspired with a fight he had with his dad... my boyfriend is always trying to help and his father never appreciates what he dose it is defiantly a toxic environment he should get out of. I just didn’t think it would be 10 hours away.

So now a little background of us we are college sweethearts been together for over 5 years gone on so many adventures together. no we are not engaged lol we are both ok with that. We always talk about the future and when we have our own place what we will do with it. Currently we are both still living with our parents. I personally have a great relationship with my parents and we are very chill with each other my boyfriend can come over when ever he wants however I am not aloud to stay over at his house the parents don’t approve.

So here’s the difference, I pay rent I split the mortgage and house hold bills In half with my parents I pay for my own car and insurance. I have worked in the same field for over 6 years starting as a part-timer and have had a full time job for 2 years. I am now a manager and I feel stable in my life to start something. My boyfriend does not pay bills or rent however he helps his parents out a-lot he cares for them since they are older and more on the frail side. He has not had a full time job for more than 6 months since I’ve known him. The field he wants to work in is very hard to get a job and currently he is an on call during the slow time he works about 15 hours a week.

So here is my question am I the asshole for explaining that before we move in together I’d like him to have a full time job for at lest 6 months to a year? If we are starting our life together I want us both to be stable. And to be honest I think he needs to live on his own for a while to realize what it’s like to own his own place he can control. :/

Am I the asshole? ######

Response: NTA.  You are contemplating the possibility that he may just be an eternal child.  And it would be a crime to enter a marital relationship with a child. ######


Prompt:
I (19F) have recently met and have now spent some time with my boyfriend’s (25M) parents. Good enough people who I enjoy even though we’re very different and have different ideologies. They also think that I am very quiet and innocent even though that’s not exactly the case.

The thing that bothers me is that they keep making comments about “your future with our son” and making them grand babies. The mom has asked me what birth control I am on, and if I’m willing to move away from family with a man. She also has said things along the lines of “skip the condom tonight.” Bf was previously married very young and has been separated for two years living in a different state from his ex. But his mom has made comments about him and I getting married and says that it’s been long enough (we’ve been dating for a little over a year) to know if he wants to marry/have kids with me.

My bf doesn’t want kids, I do, and I’m super young + going to college. Both of us are aware that this is temporary as not having kids in the future is a deal breaker for me, but again we’re young and are enjoying being with each other for now.

WIBTA if the next time they make comments I express that it makes me uncomfortable and that our relationship/sex life is really none of their business? ######

Response: Nta.  Wtf?  I'm a parent of 4 kids, and I'd never make those types of jokes (and I joke about everything) to any of my kids' SOs. ######


Prompt: Hello friends. I am a T1 diabetic, so I need to keep my insulin in the fridge. Lately I’ve been staying with my girlfriend who lives with her parents, who are very kind to temporarily take me in. I got there yesterday and I was unpacking and asked her if I could put my boxes of insulin in her fridge. She looked a bit uncomfortable and said first that there’s no space. I said this is objectively not true because their fridge is massive (she has four siblings but none of them are at home now) and there’s literally hectares of space, and besides I don’t need that much. She moved on to the next excuse which is that it’s weird to have my medication out in the open like that for other people to see. This one has really hurt my feelings. I mean it’s not like I asked for this illness. I literally need it to live. I tried to explain this to her and she said it’s their property and I should respect what they want to do with it. She also asked me not to do my injections in front of anyone else which makes me feel asif she’s somehow ashamed of me and my condition ######

Response: NTA.  Where the flying fuck does she expect you to keep it, given that insulin needs to be kept refrigerated? ######


Prompt: GF went to a huge rally the other night with at least 2 thousand people, we don’t live together but she comes over a lot and vice versa. The issue here is that I’m scared of her getting Corona and infecting me or my home. My parents have had health risks in the past and my grandparents swing by my house often to say hello or return Tupperware, and I’m scared to death of somehow leading to them getting sick. She’s been getting increasingly suspicious that I don’t wanna be around her and I don’t know what to do. I’m worried if I tell her the truth she’ll say I’m overreacting and we’ll get into a fight. AITA for wanting to keep my distance? ######

Response: NTA.  We all have to make our own choices.  Your real reasons for not hanging out might not bother her as much as the ones she's imagining.  Tell her the truth. ######


Prompt:
back story. so i've been at home because of quarantine, and decided to try grilling, burger mostly. my neighbor who is vegan and i know this for a long time. so 2 days ago i made burgers for my family, after we ate i started cleaning up the grilling stuff. and my neighbor walks outside and says "i have to stop grilling because the smell of meat is disturbing her". we both have Very big yards and i dont grill near her fence.

WEBTA if i still grill? ######

Response: NTA.  Vegetarian chiming in here. Yes, at this point the smell of meat cooking is awful to me, but it's your house, your yard, your grill, your food, and your family. Unless you're throwing meat scraps into the neighbor's yard, they get no say.  Grill on and enjoy! ######


Prompt:
(On mobile, sorry for any formatting issues. Also I talk about going out, but this was pre-covid. She just brought it up to me recently, and I wanted some other opinions.)

I (25f) love my sister (35) a lot, but sometimes when we go out she likes to tell people we're sisters and have them guess how old we are. At first this didn't bother me, but she does it any time we go out and people want to talk to us.

I'm not afraid of aging or getting wrinkles. She's always been very self conscious about her looks and is afraid of looking "old." She has had botox/fillers (not sure the difference?) to hide some of her wrinkles. She also layers on the makeup and has had her brows microbladed. I wear makeup also, but I don't go to a lot of effort to hide blemishes/under eye circles. I just like having fun eyeshadow and lipstick on.

Since getting her fillers, people will guess that we're closer in age. The last time this happened, someone thought she was younger than me. She immediately began to tease me about looking older. I wasn't wearing any makeup and hadn't made much of an effort to look cute because I'd had a busy day and was tired. I kind of lost my temper and told the guy her actual age and that she got Botox to hide her forehead wrinkles.

We argued about it. She said I was jealous and childish. I said she was self obsessed and that I didn't appreciate  this age game she likes to play with people. She told me if I put more effort into my looks, I wouldn't have to worry about it. I stopped wanting to hang out with her after that, and then with covid, I haven't had to worry about it.

Recently she brought this up in conversation and asked if I was still mad about it. I said no, and asked if she was since she brought it up. She said yes, and that I owed her an apology. I don't think I do.

TL;DR: AITA for telling a stranger that my sister who is older than me only looks young because she's had botox after she made fun of my appearance? ######

Response:
 NTA.  This is one of those cases where you reduce her fun by not being pissed off at her little game.  So just have no reaction, except maybe rolling your eyes.

She should grow up.  But a lot of people who need to grow up, don't.  OK if you kind of reduce contact. ######


Prompt:
As of now, I'm stuck in a middle eastern country with my fiance. My fiance is middle eastern, although very westernized. We have our own living arrangement there, but his mother begged us to stay with her. For starters, she's always been very rude to me. Rude comments, starts faking heart issues around my fiance etc, accuses me of being ''infertile'' because ''no grandkids yet''. Accuses me of being an eastern europe medical school graduate (when I studied in the u.s?), and much more. She didn't approve of me till the beginning, and made sure to let me know that ''he'll never marry my kind''. Ever since we've been here, it's been more of this bullshit.

The last straw was her inviting her neighbors over for tea, acting like a bitch towards me, and treating me like her personal butler. She told me to go make coffee in a demanding tone, and to get a glass of water for her. So I snapped at her, and told her no, and we started yelling at each other, arguing etc. My fiance has been cold towards me after she went and ratted to him, and I'm considering breaking things off the minute we step foot in the u.s. AITA for the way i reacted? ######

Response: NTA.  This is a preview of things to come.  I think the future MIL doesn’t like you.  I don’t think it has anything to do with customs. ######


Prompt:
I'm the oldest daughter of 3 children and have always given my parents money. My parents are both retired. They have savings, private pensions (which I helped organise) and a state pension. The mortgage is paid so they have no major expenses now.

My mum has always relied on my to contribute to the household since I started working. My Dad has not always had a steady income.  The additional has kept the dept collectors away many times.

The money is now a significant amount of my income which has meant I've not done things I want to do like travelling as I can't afford it.

I have told both parents I can't keep helping out and in 2019 I started to reduce my monthly transfers. Towards the end of each month I would get a call requesting money for essentials as they have run out which isn't making sense. They should have enough. I officially stopped transfers in December 2019.

In February I had my second child and want a year away from work to enjoy my family. My parents are happy about my growing family as they love their grandchildren but they still make requests for me to buy them things as if nothing has changed. They don't request cash but groceries, ask me to pay a bill online, amazon items etc. It all adds up to a few hundred which is less than I have previously paid.

Today my mum called me with her latest request, I said she would need to send me money to cover it and she said as her oldest child I need to look after my parents. I stuck to my guns and said I would need the money as I'm not working and she told me to forget it hung up. Now my folks aren't picking up the phone or responding to messages. I've been helping out for the last 15 years. I just can't afford it anymore.

AITA for no longer financially supporting my parents? ######

Response: NTA.  They're the assholes for exploiting you. Where is the money going if they don't have major expenses? If groceries, perhaps they should look into coupon clipping or other methods of cutting down the grocery bill ######


Prompt:
I was supposed to go on a trip with my best friend next year, just the two of us and we'd both been saving for it. I have a credit card that rewards me airmiles and I've been using it exclusively for the past year to get a free ticket and airmiles.

We now get to travel for the price of 1 ticket instead of 2 and we get to go business class so we've saved about £1,000 each. He's suddenly decided to invite his GF, knowing full well then we don't get along. This was annoying enough and made me not want to go on the trip but now he's expecting me to use my free ticket and airmiles to make it cheaper for her as well.

I don't like her in the slightest and want to go o a trip with my best friend. As that's not happening I told him I'm not going to use my airmiles for him and her and will travel solo if she's coming. She's an awful person and being in the same car as her is bad enough, let alone a 12+ hour flight and then 10 days on holiday.

Now he's calling me an asshole because I'm making him choose between a cheap trip together, or her. ######

Response: NTA.  There is a van value to those miles.   This is no different than him asking you to pay cash for part of her ticket.  The fact that he knows you two don't get along makes the request insulting. ######


Prompt:
Me and my wife split 11 years ago when our daughter was 5-6 months old, we split cause she cheated on me and went to marry the guy she cheated on me with.  I remarried 3 years later and had my son (who is now 9).  The way custody works is that I get her for 1 week a month, christmas, thanksgiving and easter while my wife gets her during the summer.  My ex's husband had 3 kids of his own, 1 of them her birthday falls on the day right after my daughter's and she told me when she's at her mom's house they share a birthday.  me, my wife and son are currently out of state and helping out my in-laws cause they are old and need help now of days.  I already mailed my gift and told my ex to give it to her on her birthday, she's always wanted air pods so I got her a pair.  I had a bag and stuffing in the box and asked my ex if she could set it up for her

My ex texted me yesterday saying what I got my daughter is nowhere near what the other kid is getting and asked me to either chip in to get her something or wait.  I told my ex that I won't and that my daughter has wanted this for awhile, she told me that it is unfair that my daughter gets a better present than her sister.  I tried to compromise and said she can name the present in both our names (mine and ex) and get her daughter something a little bigger or more "equal" if she likes but I'm not going to just not give her the gift cause I probably won't see her for another month or so.  My ex is saying I'm being unreasonable AITA? ######

Response: NTA.  The stepdaughter needs to understand that there are different parental relationships and she doesn't get exactly the same as her sister.  And I wouldn't have it be "from" both of you, either.  It's a gift from her dad, plain and simple.  If your wife is bitter about it, that's her problem. ######


Prompt: I was at the store and there was a family in front of me. They were short $20 and were about to put groceries back. I felt bad for their kids who looked at their dad who had to decide whether or not to put back the bread or cheese.To me, $20 is nothing so I told the cashier I would pay. I did not know the woman behind me was recording and she posted it on social media. Someone recognized me and tipped me off. I DM'd the woman who posted the video and asked her to take it down because I don't want the attention. You can clearly see my face and the name of the company that I work for on my polo shirt. I also didn't want people to think this was some sort of stunt. I know a lot of people pull fake "charity" for attention. She refused so I contacted the social media company's admin and they took it down for me. ######

Response: NTA.  The person who filmed and posted it was just trying to get attention for themselves through your good deed.  Apart from you not wanting the publicity they also didn't think about how that video could have been humiliating for the family involved. ######


Prompt:
My partner and I live in a garden apartment, our windows are literally ground level.

We were sitting there watching tv (tv is under the window), and we see a kid in our window. Kid doesn’t just look in and leave, kid stares in. For a hot minute. I walk out, see mom, and ask her to not allow her kid to stare in my window. She says her kid was playing in the yard. We live in an apartment building, fair enough. However, there’s a giant bush in front of our window. You can’t get to our window without going around this massive bush.

I told her to teach her kid to not stare into people’s windows.

This lady lost it. Completely. She started screaming at me that kids don’t know and that she didn’t mean anything and all this.

I told her I get she’s a kid, but maybe teach her to not stare in people’s windows?

Again, she lost it. Her kid started sobbing. This woman called the cops on me for making her daughter cry. Not kidding. She called the cops for that.

I tried walking over to her a few minutes later and talk to her, tell her I get kids will be kids, but kid should know to not stare in windows, and she just continued to go the fuck off on me. And how I made her daughter cry and made her daughter hysterical and how I’m going to get arrested for making her daughter so upset.

The cops came. They actually did. I told them I just tried to tell her I wasn’t ok with her kid looking in my window. The cops were not impressed by this call, at all. We live in Chicago, there’s about 102839 other things the cops could be doing besides dealing with this.

They told us to avoid each other. No problem for me.

Am I the asshole for this? Should I have been more understanding? ######

Response: NTA.  The mom should have told her child not to stare in the window. ######


Prompt: To be honest she is very lazy and does not train her dog or bring it outside. He shots and pees all over their house and she doesn’t care. She wants to bring the dog because she refuses to put it in a kennel. She asks all the time and makes up a sob story on why she needs to bring him. I told her If she started actually taking care of her dog that he could come. My friend told me I was an asshole for causing a family member to be inconvenienced and that I judged the way she cared for her dog. ######

Response: NTA.  That’s a big inconvenience and mess to impose on someone. ######


Prompt:
I've been with my gf S for 4 years, living together for 2. Off the start of the relationship I knew she was a picky eater. We would go to fancy  restaurants and she would order the simplest things or the same things over and over. It seemed weird to me but I didn't really care,she can do whatever she wants. I only really realized how annoying this is when we moved in together.

Now I on the other part I'm the opposite. I like to try new foods, new tastes and get a better idea of food in general. I also love cooking and have a culinary arts degree (I wanted to become a chef but I didn't for other reasons). So you can assume that I do almost all the cooking at home. You can see where this is going.

Only when I started cooking for S did I realize how picky of an eater she is. She hates almost everything, even if she can't really taste it in the end product. To give you some examples:

She hates cinnamon.

She hates garlic.

She hates any kind of spice. (clove, nutmeg etc)

Yesterday I was making a Spanish omelet and she complained when I added the tiniest pinch of thyme in there. Because of all the ingredients I put in there she is gonna taste the pinch of thyme in there.

I made a white chocolate mousse and she complained when I layerd it with oreos(!) and strawberries, because she apparently doesn't like oreos.

No amount of zest can go into our food whether that be orange or lemon zest bacsuse it apparently tastes bitter.

She hates spicy food.

She only eats stakes or whatever well done. If there's the tiniest amount of pink in there it's raw. (I've destroyed so many good stakes in the past cooking them well done).

I could go on about this she doesn't like but we'd be here all day. Last night she asked me to cook dinner but I refused. When she asked why I explained that it's frustrating to cook for a person with the tastebuds of a 5 year old, and that she can order takeout from now on. So reddit WIBTA if I stopped cooking for her? ######

Response: NTA.  That's ridiculous.  I don't prepare separate meals for the kids in our house when I cook.  If I'm cooking everyone is getting what's prepared.  If she doesn't like what you cook she can cook herself. ######


Prompt:
First off I'll explain our family. When I met my husband he had a 3 year old daughter from a previous relationship. Her name is Alexandra. I married Alex's dad when she was five. So technically I'm her step mom. Alex's mom is also remarried. She calls both me and her bio mom "mom" and both my husband and her step dad "dad". All four of us think of her as a daughter and she lives with her mom and stepdad 50% of the time and me and my husband the other 50% of the time. Basically she has two sets of parents. Sorry if i worded it confusing.

I don't really have any problems with Alex's mom even though she is a bit on the conservative side. Meaning she thinks tampons take your virginity. She has told Alex that she doesn't want her using them. The problem is that Alex is 14 now and wants to by on the swim team when the schools reopen. Me and my husband also have a pool in the backyard and swim a lot in the summers. She says that she doesn't like being the only one who can't swim when she's on her period.

One day Alex was staying at our house and she told me how worried she was about having to deal with her period when she starts the swim team. She also disclosed to me that it's not fair that all of her other friends get to use tampons.

Later that night I bought her a box. I told her that they would stay at our house in the bathroom and she could use them whenever she needs them for swimming. And said that her mom didn't have to know. I feel back and have never gone behind her bio mom's back like that before. However, I grew up with a conservative mom like that. I understand that it can lead to things that cause embarrassment (for instance swimming in a pad). I didn't want Alex to have to go through something like that like I did.

I feel like I did right by my daughter but still feel a bit of guilt. Aita? ######

Response: NTA.  That's not how virginity works and if dad says OK, you're good.  Just make sure she doesn't forget she is wearing one when she leaves your house. ######


Prompt:
My (25M) girlfriend (25F) of a year and a half just moved into my apartment two or three weeks ago.

She usually orders takeout, but last night she decided she wanted to start cooking for herself.

I walk into the kitchen and see she has a piece of raw chicken in the sink, so I ask her not to do that since it'll get bacteria on the sink and anything else that goes in there. Instead of taking it out and using the bowl I sat next to her, she picks it up and turns on the faucet trying to wash it, as I saw my life flashing before my eyes, splashing water all over the place, and I say you're not supposed to wash chicken because it spreads bacteria, as she says "what bacteria?". She then takes one hand off of the chicken and uses it to turn off the faucet, the whole time I'm saying she could have gotten salmonella all over the sink/counter/faucet as she takes the chicken to my cutting board table I use to cut fruit, places the chicken down, and walks over to the fridge (without washing her hands), opens it with her still wet hand, as she starts rummaging through the fruit/vegi drawer.  I tell her she's going to have to wash the handle now and any think else she touched because that could become a breeding ground for bacteria as she yells "stop pissing me off and just leave me alone, I guarantee you any chicken you've eating at a restaurant was made the same way ". So I did.

I went to the bedroom and an hour later I hear her eating and talking on facetime when she tells the person how "I went psycho over some f\*cking chicken", "followed her around telling her how to cook her own dinner" and how I "need a reality check".

I feel like ass for bringing it up since she was only trying to cook herself dinner, and I'm not generally a germaphobe, but this is just one of those things.

AITA/a germaphobe psycho who needs to chill? ######

Response: NTA.  That's a huge sanitation issue.  Also I can guarantee you an restaurant caught handling chicken like that would be slapped with a major fine for breach of food handling practices.  I would honestly toss anything in the fruit and veg draw, salmonella isn't worth the risk. ######


Prompt:
I’m pretty sure I already know the answer to this, but here it goes anyway:

After 20 years of being a content screw-up, I finally decided to better myself and finish college. After earning my bachelor’s, I immediately went to grad school and earned my MBA this May.

Anyway, around the same time I initially decided to go back to school, my bro-in-law also decided to go back. He decided to pursue an associate’s degree in a trade.

Seeing as how he wasn’t working while he was going to school, he finished in two years. However, I was working full-time so it took me 7 years to finish both my bachelor’s and my MBA (I had finished most of my generals my first go-around 20 years earlier). I only say this because he would always make comments about how I’m ‘sure taking my time’ and how he finished way before me.

My family had a little celebration for me a few weeks ago and he kept making comments about how I’m finally his equal (emphasis on finally) and joined the ranks as a college graduate.

I didn’t say anything (nor would I) because I don’t want to diminish his accomplishment. At the same time, I can’t help but feel annoyed that he doesn’t seem to get that I had to put in a lot more work to get my degrees.

I guess it bothers me that I feel this way. After all, to him, his associate’s degree is a huge deal (and it is).

So, AIT(elitist)A?

TLDR: My bro-in-law keeps equating his associate’s degree to my master’s, and it bothers me. ######

Response: NTA.  That must be super annoying, but good for you for keeping your mouth closed and taking the high road.  That says a lot about your character.  Everyone else knows how hard you worked for your degree. ######


Prompt:
This sounds ridiculous but here goes!

I (26f) will be eating sometimes (lunch or dinner) and my husband (26m) or our son (18m ), if they aren’t eating or have already finished, will take food off of my plate and feed it to our dog.

It happened last night, I am a slow eater and finished after my husband. We were talking while I finished and he grabbed a piece of chicken from my plate and tossed it to the dog. I asked him why he would do that and he just laughed, I don’t think he understood that it actually bothered me but his reaction made me feel like I was being crazy.

But just now, I was eating lunch (we are all working from home/schooling hasn’t started) when my son came in and scooped up some of my chips and fed them to the dog. Again, I was upset so I asked why he would do that. His reaction was the same, that it was funny and he didn’t think I actually cared.

I feel like an asshole but also, I don’t like that they keep taking food from my plate? It wouldn’t ever even cross my mind to take food from their plates? Also, they do this all the time but usually to eat it themselves, and I didn’t mind as much before because I want them to be full. But the dog has food and table food isn’t good for his stomach anyway so that seems to bother me even more? I don’t know. Am I an asshole?

Edit to add: Son is 18 years old and adopted— sorry I should have clarified. ######

Response: NTA.  That is your food on your plate.  If they want to feed the dog then they need to do it from their own plate.  Besides that, they risk the dog getting sick.  Doggy diarrhea isn't fun to clean up.  Next time one of them does it jab them with a fork (that's how my grandma taught her kids to not reach in front of her at the table and to not take food off of her plate). ######


Prompt:
Throwaway.

My wife and I have an 8 year old daughter. I’ll preface this by saying she is slightly chubby, however I feel as though this is par for the course for her age.

For the past few months, there have been several events that struck me as odd. What stuck out most to me was when a parent told me that she had “ruined” her friend’s birthday party by lecturing the other kids on the dangers of eating cake, and overall how squirrelly she gets when I offer her a bite of a snack or ask if she wants seconds.

Recently, as I’ve been around her more, I’ve noticed her mannerisms. She always pulls at her shirt, hunched over, etc. So today, I asked her if anything was wrong, and she told me that she was fat. I asked her why she thought that, and she flat-out said “mommy told me”.

I was livid. I went straight to my wife and asked her if it was true. She said yes. I, calmly, asked her why she would say such a thing to an 8 year old. She told me what she’d said before, about how she was fat as a child and her mother lied about it. She said her mother would scream and punish her if she so much as mentioned she wanted to lose weight, and how she had to find out from nasty comments by other kids at school that she was fat. She finished with “I’ll be damned if I ever let that happen to our daughter”

I said “well, good job. You fucked her up for the rest of her life. How dare you say that to your own daughter”. She said “oh trust me, it would’ve been worse if she had to find out from other kids”. We went on for a while. I realized that she truly believed she was justified, body shaming and putting an 8 year old on a diet.

I am still extremely mad about this. AITA for being angry at my wife? ######

Response: NTA.  That is scarring and can lead to eating disorders.  Trust me, I know.  Putting her on a diet is not the answer, just teach her about healthy foods, portions, and exercise and do it TOGETHER.  Telling her she is fat is appalling.  I would be LIVID and I know first hand the effect that has on self esteem, confidence, social skills, and body image.  Seek counseling for her (maybe even family counseling).  And hug your little girl and tell her she is beautiful please... 💜 ######


Prompt:
back story. so i've been at home because of quarantine, and decided to try grilling, burger mostly. my neighbor who is vegan and i know this for a long time. so 2 days ago i made burgers for my family, after we ate i started cleaning up the grilling stuff. and my neighbor walks outside and says "i have to stop grilling because the smell of meat is disturbing her". we both have Very big yards and i dont grill near her fence.

WEBTA if i still grill? ######

Response: NTA.  Tell your neighbor she needs to stop speaking to you because the sound is disturbing to you. ######


Prompt:
My sister and I were paying the ALL utilities/food and giving my mom $300 towards the mortgage, and she was covering the rest. Summer 2018, we get evicted from our longtime home as she wasn't paying the mortgage. I took out two private school loans to get us a place to live during my last year of college. Basically I took out money for what would be room and board for Jr and Sr year. I used that money and put a large upfront payment on an townhouse for us to rent while I finished college.

College finished, I got a job making $73k/yr. During senior year of college I was able to save up a bit of cash, seeing as we are living on loans. I used that cash as downpayment/closing-costs and bought back our foreclosed home from the bank.

&#x200B;

Its going to be a year since we moved back in, and I am absolutely miserable. My sister and mother both lost their jobs. My sister has picked up job doing writing but it equates to like $12k/year. My mother is collecting widows social security, and a pension, its like $30k/year.

&#x200B;

I'm footing the entire mortgage and electricity bill. I am fucking miserable, and I can't stand living with them anymore. I'm fairly certain they're miserable too but I don't know how to fix it for them. I want sell the house separate from them financially, but there quality of life would suffer greatly. Maybe live in poverty areas, if not be completely homeless. WIBTA if I did this? ######

Response: NTA.  Tell them you have footed the bill for X number of years and you are done.  They need to find a place to live.  Give them notice.  You will be putting the house up for sale in 30 days. ######


Prompt:
So basically I'm french so sorry for the fault. My neighbor had a cat and was breeding dogs to sell them and the dogs didn't love the cat. So sometimes she was coming home, eat and walk in the field next to our house. And one day the cat was overturn by a car and was in a bad situation and she decided to see us  and not to the cat owner. And when we take her to the vets her owners wouldn't pay for the bills !!!

The vet said to us that we can keep the cat and they will pay for it. So we decided to take her home and when the kids came to our house they said that we stole their cat !!!

So am I the Asshole for keeping my neighbor cat's ######

Response: NTA.  Tell the kids that the cat chose you for its owners, as you are feeding It and taking it to the vet.  I know norms may be different in France, if that is where you are, but it is much safer for cats to be indoors, as your poor kitty can attest to.  Dangerous things like cars, wild animals, diseases, even domestic dogs can end a cat’s life. ######


Prompt:
My husband is working from home, I’m a stay at home mom, although I do freelance graphic design.

At work, my husband had a secretary/assistant(he flip flops on what he calls her) that he apparently relies on very heavily. Because when he started working from home he started asking me to write things down for him, remind him to call people, he even asked me to cancel a meeting for him(I don’t actually even have the ability to do that). He asks me to send emails for him(also can’t do that).

Our son is home and I’m homeschooling him, and also having to keep him entertained during the day, and while that’s not a full time job, it would prevent me from doing all the things my husband asks for even if I wanted to.

I figured he was just having trouble adjusting and just continued his natural work flow, which happened to end up with him asking me to do things. But he never stopped so last week I asked him to stop asking me to do things.

Today I sat him down and had a longer conversation that half the things he asks are not possible for me to do, and I don’t like feeling like his assistant, so I want him to stop.

He got annoyed and asked if I could just do the simple ones, and it’s only fair. I don’t understand what would be fair about it, but then he said he had a meeting and walked away. AITA? ######

Response: NTA.  Teaching *is* a full time job.  Plus you do freelance.  Has he considered asking his assistant to assist remotely? ######


Prompt:
My brother and his girlfriend are expecting their first child, she’s very early on in the pregnancy.

We had a family meal not too long ago and I asked my brothers girlfriend how she was handling the pregnancy and if she was concerned about the babies future health?

She paused and asked what I meant so I told her; my sister has type 1 diabetes, both my parents have type 2 along with heart problems, my parents and sister have eye sight problems, my mother suffers from borderline personality whilst my father has an addictive personality (alcohol and gambling) one of my brothers has BPD, two of my brothers have autism as well, my grandfather had schizophrenia and my aunt had epilepsy.

Apparently my brother had told her precisely none of this and now she’s freaking out and considering terminating over it.

I’ve been getting texts from family that I’ve crossed a line and shouldn’t have told her, that I should’ve pulled my brother aside and asked him if he’d told her, some are telling me if she goes ahead with ending the pregnancy they don’t want to be in my life.

I myself have decided not to have biological children due to my family’s medical history.

AITA? ######

Response: NTA.  Take it from me, it's far better that you told her something that is extremely important like family medical hsitory now than for her to find out after the kid is born.  My mom never forgave my dad & his side of the family for not telling her the family medical history until I (the youngest) was 4, and from the great aunt who married into the family no less. ######


Prompt:
So for a while now I’ve owned two horses, mine and my daughters (13F) and they’re about 4 now.

2 years ago my sister got her daughter a horse, my niece is 12 now.

They usually only visit Fri,Sat & Sun for about 2hours so I usually let them into the field of a morning, groom them and put them away of a night which I charge £30 every two weeks.

(The field isn’t attached to our house, it’s on the other side of the road.)

We’re planning on moving, its a 5hr 12min drive meaning my sister couldn’t  drive here as frequently and she can’t afford to rent the field her daughters horse is in currently.

I told her I’d keep her horse up here for her daughter for £160 a month which includes caring for the horse.

She’s offered to sell me the horse.

I’m considering it, I did say I’d be willing to pick her daughter up for the weekends but that isn’t possible as the weekends are my nieces fathers custody agreement.

I’ve been getting called/texted by family members saying what an AH I am for exploiting family/stealing my nieces horse when I can afford to do it for free especially while she’s going through a hard time (her parents divorced)

WIBTA? ######

Response: NTA.  Sounds like they don’t have much of an alternative. It also sounds like she wouldn’t be able to see the horse often whether she owned it or you owned it.  Divorce sucks for kids. ######


Prompt: I can’t exactly remember how it got to this but my mom and I were talking about the house were living in and she said “And then when you move out I can come live with you” and I said “Oh I don’t really want you to live with me” and she got mad and was like “Do you not care about me and want to take care of me?” And like yeah I do care about her I just don’t want to have her live with me when I have my own house. It’s MY own house. She was talking about how she can’t do her job forever. She’s a 51 year old fitness trainer. Her knees are fucked up and she’s not gonna be able to do it for long and she knows that. She said “I’m not gonna get a new job once I can’t do this one. Are you not gonna take care of me?” I see it as her fault for choosing that as her only job or whatever. Anyways yeah that’s all I gotta say ######

Response:
 NTA.  Sounds like the two of you can discuss things, so when she talks about not being a fitness trainer forever, tell her now's the time to retrain for a second career.  If she can prove she is disabled at her current occupation, she might be able to get college tuition from a disability agency.  A couple of semesters and certifications in office work, for instance, might get her started.

Anyway, moving into one's own place is a step in becoming fully yourself.  Don't be guilted out of that. ######


Prompt:
I've dated a girl for a few months. I'm her first since her husband of 2 weeks died a year ago this July.
She wants to bring this kid along, but doesn't want her husband's family to know she's dating, so we can't flirt, hold hands, kiss etc. with him around.

Because of that, I said we can't bring him unless she can tell him about us. She can't tell him, but already promised the kid he'd join us. I told her she'd have to go without me if she's gonna bring him.

It might be worth to mention she's got a couple of friends with us to disguise the fact that she's travelling with her new boyfriend.

So, am I the asshole here, or is my decision fair? ######

Response: NTA.  Sounds like she isn’t ready to do this yet.  Also, as a side note, it may be more polite to refer to him as her deceased husband.  “Dead exhusband” makes it sound like they were divorced, and that doesn’t appear to be the case. ######


Prompt:
My wife is a professional level chef, or I guess was. Anyway, I usually cook on weekends and Fridays, and she cooks during the rest of the week.

The thing is, when she sees me cooking, she always tries to help me. Like, I don’t add enough salt, then she adds more salt. It’s super annoying, and I’ve told her to stop that or else I wouldn’t cook about a hundred times. I decided to stop last Sunday. Now, she’s getting mad at me. She says that I’m throwing a tantrum.

I’m not. I’m just keeping up my words for once. If she changes, then I’ll cook.

So, AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA.  So, so very NTA . So, I am not a professional chef.  But I am a really, really good cook.  So I understand your wife in my fucking bones.  It makes me *itch* to see people clumsily hacking up an onion with a dull-ass knife and undersalting everything and dude are you using preground pepper and then I have to yell at myself to shut the fuck up and let them cook for me.  Because y’know what?  It usually ends up great.  They’re doing their best, they’re cooking with as much skill and love as they have to bring to the table, they just want to make something good for me, and most of the time, it ends up just fine.  So I learned to chill.

Cooking is a really hard skill to learn much less master, people are already intimidated by cooking for a good cook, you can’t make it worse on them or they’ll just say screw it, you do it.  You shut up and you eat the good food they make you even if the potatoes are still a little stiff or it needs some salt.  So if an asshole like me can get over that hump, she can go have a glass of wine, let you cook for her without editorial input, and eat what you make with a smile. ######


Prompt: I (18F) live with my mom, dad, eldest sister(26F), her husband (23M) and their three little girls(9,7,1) I have spinal problems due to a stair incident in 7th grade. Blah blah blah pandemic keeps me from doctors blah blah losing mobility in hips down blah blah need cane and constant medication to walk normally. I’m upstairs doing my coursework and my cane is hanging on the chair next to me. My sister comes up to feed the baby and moves my cane. Which usually is, like, whatever, i move it to my lap or on the back of my chair. But this time she moves it a few feet out of reach near the kitchen counter. Still whatever, I just point out that I can’t reach my cane from there and she says ‘well it’s not like your going anywhere anyways’ which, rude, but fair enough I’m working at that moment so it’s whatever. I pause my work and play with the baby. I help feed her, everything is fine, I’m getting tired and my sister takes the baby when she’s done eating. She’s in the kitchen and I need to get up so I can go and rest but my cane’s too far. My sisters husband comes upstairs with a sippy cup and before he passes me I ask ‘Hey (HISNAME), can you pass me my cane? (SISTER) put it too far’. Cue sister getting huffy and her husband rolling eyes asking how I could be blaming her. I’m tired, I just want to nap. He hands me my cane I bid them adieu and leave to take my nap. Sister is offended by this whole interaction. Am I the asshole? ######

Response: NTA.  Sister doesn't like being called out, maybe next time she won't move your cane or will replace when she moves. ######


Prompt:
I was having an conversation with a friend and she was explaining to me how covid-19 has been really hard on her, and adding home schooling on top everything else just is the icing on top of it all. I made a brief comment how I’m so grateful I don’t have children at the moment.

She fucking lost it on me.

I sympathize with her 100% but am I the asshole? ######

Response: NTA.  She’s on edge and took it out on you ######


Prompt:
My husband and I have been married for 4 years and instead of having a wedding we eloped.

My mother was completely devastated. No one else in my family really  cared, everyone was very happy that we got married. For the past 4 years my mother has been asking us to have a “real” wedding. She says it’s completely unfair we eloped and brings it up constantly.

My mother sends me photos of weddings dresses, has cried at family gatherings over the fact we won’t get married and took the dress I wore when I eloped and wore it. She mentioned multiple times that she looked better it in than I did and posted photos on social media of her in my dress.

Even though it’s been 4 years, she is adamant that we should have a “wedding” for our fifth anniversary. She wants us to have a cake that we can cut together, me to have a dance with my dad and to have a huge party with relatives. We keep saying no but she proceeds to bring it up when other family members are around. She has said she will never forget that we took away experiencing a wedding from her.

She has offered to spend ridiculous amounts of money for a wedding and we have politely declined. She has told us we won’t be getting any money from her for anything else because the offer of money was only for a wedding (we don’t care)

So AITA? My family is torn. Some people think we should have a party so my mother can get over it and some have said wta for eloping since weddings are for family. My husband and I do not want to have a wedding and are glad we eloped. I have other siblings so it isn’t like there will never be a wedding. ######

Response:
 NTA.  She sounds like a pill.

I think she actually wants to be the bride.  If she is dying to spend for a wedding suggest she and your dad have a vow renewal. ######


Prompt:
I was a vegetarian for 3 years, and since been a vegan short over 3 years. My old sister a vegetarian for around 6 years and my youngest sister a vegetarian for around 4 years.

My parents are divorced and my sisters and I live with my dad and see my mom probably once a week. My dad has been a vegetarian for as long as I know, probably since I was 8, around 12 years but mom still eats meat (which is completely fine).

My youngest sister and I were going to my moms cottage for a week and she meal prepped us some veggie meals to bring because the meals she was planning to eat throughout the week all had meat. Probably on our third or fourth day at the cottage, my mom was making chili for dinner. My sister and I both assumed that my mother was preparing us the meal prepped chili she made us, which she told us she was. As we began eating it, we saw and tasted ground beef. We confronted her causing a huge fight to break out. Since then we haven’t talked to my mom, it’s been about 3 weeks. ######

Response: NTA.  She knew what she was doing. It's not like this was a new thing.  She probably was just trying to pull one over on you to try and "catch" you not being able to tell the difference. ######


Prompt:
For context, I am a White and Japanese 17 year old non-binary person. My dads father came from Japan and met my paternal grandmother a White woman. My dad married my mother (an blue-eyed irish polish white woman) and had me. I came out with curly, (My mother) dark hair (My dad) and blue eyes (My mother) I am pale.

My maternal grandmother (White, Catholic woman) has always been pissed off about my mom having a kid with another race. She refuses to accept my Asian culture.

I am visting my grandma, and I have been missing my dad's cooking  (He's an amazing cook) and I asked my grandma if we could go to a Japanese store to get some food items I needed to make stuff. She sighed and huffed "When are you going to realize you're not Asian" I corrected her saying I very much am Asian she told me I didn't look like it. I told her that I got that from my mother, she told me I am in no way Japanese and I should stop appropriating their culture.

I got mad and stormed off, I really wasn't in the mood for aruging. She has met and seen my dad, but my paternal grandfather died from a heart attack before I was born, and neither me nor my maternal grandmother has met him.

I have tried talking to her about it, but she always fires back with "But you look white, therefore you are white" I really don't know what to do or say to her. AITA? ######

Response: NTA.  She is being ridiculous.  Just because you look “white” it doesn’t mean you aren’t a part of other cultures. ######


Prompt:
Due to current global circumstances all our staff meetings are through a zoom like platform.

While we were waiting for the office manager to get on, everyone was showing off their pets and then the moms in there group started to talk about their kids, etc.

My coworker (35F), lets call her Z, was talking her daughter (7) being stubborn and “unwilling to do anything she doesn’t want.” Ya know. It’s whatever, nobody cared cause this meeting wasn’t about people’s children or their parenting. I basically forgot she said anything about her kid.

This is where I may have been an ass:
At the end of our meeting Z grabbed her daughter walking by and shoved her in front of the camera and said “here’s miss brat who never listens!” and I just got annoyed and said “we love strong women, don’t change!”

It’s just a personal annoyance of mine when people talk down about their kids, but I’m not a parent. So I really can’t say whether or not that’s normal, but as someone who came from an abusive home growing up, it rubbed me the wrong way.

My other coworker after the meeting said that was a dick move but I don’t think I was being an ass, just trying to make light of a weird way to describe and then show off your child. AITA?

If I am an asshole, I’ll say sorry to Z but she hasn’t said anything to me directly but I could tell it annoyed her.
(Also, I’m 25F to make it more clear) ######

Response: NTA.  She humiliated her child in front of a bunch of strangers (to the child) and you said something to take the heat out of it. ######


Prompt:
My student Spotify premium plan ran out so I went to the website to buy a regular plan. I noticed that they offer a family plan and figured it would be cheaper if I chose this option and split the cost with the people I invited.

I asked around and got a few coworkers and friends to join. The plan costs $15/mo. Split evenly that equaled our to $2.50 per person. I asked for them to pay me $2.50 each month on the 15th. It’s not a whole lot of money at all, for me or them, so it kinda felt silly to ask so for so little, but made sense.

Anyways, several months go by. People pay. Sometimes two of the people forget, and I’ll charge them on the Venmo after a few days.

These last two months, however, one friend hasn’t paid for the past two months. The other paid for this month but not last month. I charged them for these missing payments on Venmo (again, very little amount, but it’s disrespectful to disregard what we agreed on) and they’ve ignored it.

I don’t talk to that coworker (I left the job) and never really talked to her to begin with. Would it be rude if I just removed her from the plan without even texting her? All I did was request on Venmo so far ######

Response: NTA.  Send out an email/text that says “I’m having some issues with folks either paying their agreed upon amount late, or in some cases not at all.  *Please set yourself a reminder*, or alternatively, let me know in advance that you want to drop out.  And going forward, if your portion of the bill isn’t received by the 15th, the assumption will be that you want to discontinue, and you’ll be removed from the account.” ######


Prompt:
My cousins "James" and "Lydia" have 9 children. They are a wonderful family, and we spend holidays together. My husband and I suspect that their youngest "Grace" has Down syndrome due to very subtle physical features, motor delays, and her mother's age when she had her, but we haven't said anything to anyone else in the family.

When we were over to their house for Thanksgiving, I was fussing over all the kids like usual, and things went wrong when I got to Grace. I did the whole "Wow, you're so big!" thing and asked Lydia, "Is she walking yet?" Lydia very harshly snapped, "No. But nothing is wrong with her." Honestly, it was a little shocking and I was caught off guard. All I said was "Okay. But if there was, you know we would never love her any less." That was the end of that, and I thought everything was okay. Then, we weren't invited to the family Christmas.

I recently was talking on the phone to James and brought up to him that we had gotten all the kids Christmas gifts. He then told me that Lydia is still very upset that I asked if Grace was walking yet and that she expected an apology before we would be welcome over again. I'm planning on apologizing anyway, but I really don't think I did anything wrong. AITA? ######

Response: NTA.  Seems like you hit a sore spot, and she overreacted. ######


Prompt:
Hi all,

So I referred my girlfriend for my old job (I was more or less promoted for got a 10k raise) She got the job and is now also paid 10K more a year than she used to be paid. We live together as well.

I was given a referral bonus of 1K. She is insistent that I share it with her. I was not too fond of this idea and she is now very upset because “I make so much more money than her” and “she does so much for me” and “she works so hard at the new job” etc. Am I an asshole? ######

Response: NTA.  Referral bonuses for new hires is very standard practice, and is not meant to be shared for anyone who demands it.  Tell your gf to refer somebody else for hire and she can have that whole bonus if they are hired. ######


Prompt:
I have a babysitter who watches my two young girls while me and my husband go to work. She brings her daughter with her. She’s always been great. One day, she was about 10 minutes late which made me late for work. It’s fine because it hasn’t happened before, and she apologized and I thought we were all good.

A day later, she lets me know that she had been helping my daughter on her iPad and some texts popped up between me and my husband. I was complaining to him that the babysitter was late that morning and it made me late to work. Well, she kept reading and read all our texts for the past month. I had also complained to him once that our babysitter had eaten all our Oreos. It was just funny banter, and I got over it quickly but I was still whining. I would have never said anything to her about it.

Anyway, the babysitter texted me the night before she was supposed to watch my kids next that she was quitting because of those texts she read. She was really hurt I would complain about her to him. I feel horrible but also violated that she read all our texts. I apologized for what I said but I still feel sad about it all. AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA.  Reading texts that pop up is one thing, but the next step is to immediately tell the parents that those texts are popping up and the next step is to NOT VIOLATE SOMEONE'S PRIVACY BY READING TEXTS GOING BACK AN ENTIRE MONTH.

Babysitter was unprofessional by doing that and you're better off securing your electronics and hiring someone else. ######


Prompt: When my girls were 5-6 years old they were cute as buttons and would often be used for kid's clothing fashion parades. Their mother usually arranged all this. But one day an advertising agency called and unfortunately, got me on the phone. The job was for a beach-side fashion photography shoot. I said they were available and how much would they be paid? The woman told me there was "no fee involved". I asked her if the photographer was being paid? "Yes". Was the catalogue printing company being paid? "Yes" Was the client paying a fee to the agency for the promotion? "Yes" "So, out of all these people involved in a for-profit commercial enterprise, the only ones NOT being paid were the actual models?" "Yes", she replied. "But they are only 5+6 years old". I expressed my wish NOT to teach my kids how to be exploited and the woman asked if she could speak to the mother instead. Of course, their mother hit the roof and told me I was an asshole. ######

Response: NTA.  People keep expecting artists and models to do work for exposure.  Good on you for recognizing you and your family deserve compensation for your time and efforts. ######


Prompt:
I never wanted kids. The idea of family is very suffocating to me and I was never willing to date a man with children. When i met my husband he said he didn't have any and didn't want any. A year later when he was drinking he admitted that he had gotten his high school girlfriend pregnant when they were both 18 and begged her to abort but she hadn't wanted to so he had a son who he had never met and he had signed away his parental rights. I was annoyed that he lied but I 100% believe that men have the right to walk away.

When my stepson was sixteen his mother passed away and he found my husband's contact information from an old friend. I completely supported my husband taking him and stepping up, and I actually really liked him. We have a good friendship, but obviously he doesn't view me as a parent. He married the most annoying woman ever and they have three children.

He recently asked if we would be able to babysit overnight so they could go to a wedding. My husband agreed and I reminded everyone I don't babysit. My husband said it would be fine and I didn't need to help. Well that lasted about ten minutes, because my husband does not know what to do with children and was begging for me to help. His DIL gave him a list of rules and things they aren't allowed to eat, so he was in a pissy mood over that and once the kids actually started running around and making noise he couldn't handle it and expected me to step in.

Well I didn't. I'm actually a terrible person and let them have water guns, so my husband ended up throwing a tantrum and locking himself in the bedroom. I did make sure the children didn't die, but like I stated to everyone involved, I do not babysit. They got into food they weren't supposed to have (no allergies) and didn't sleep at all, but they are alive. DIL is furious with me, because I'm the woman and I am apparently responsible, and my husband is off sulking. ######

Response: Nta.  Ovaries doesnt mean you fucking know what to do with children. ######


Prompt:
My husband (M32) and I (F27) discussed children before we got married, at that point we were both unsure of whether or not we wanted children. Last year he told me that he wanted to try for a baby and I agreed on the premise that I would get to decide the full names of our children (maybe this seems petty to some of you, but the names are very important to me). To be honest, I would have likely still had children with him even if he said no, but he said yes. We did agree that he’d get to veto any one name I chose if he hated it though.

Fast forward a year and I’m 5 months pregnant. We’ve decided to keep the baby’s gender a surprise so we’ve been working on girl and boy names. He vetoed Anastasia and talked me out of Lucianna, so for a girl we landed on Clara. For a boy, he vetoed Logan and I eventually chose Sebastian. Sorted, right? Wrong.

His mother is desperate for the baby to be named after herself, her husband and her parents (with the first name being either the baby’s great grandmother’s name or great grandfather’s name, and the middle name being baby’s grandmother or father’s name.). She’s been blowing up our phones about it but truthfully (and I feel mean saying this) I don’t like any of their names.

She’s been blowing up my husband’s phone and he’s starting to argue with me about the name. I reminded him of our deal but he told me we should honour the family and his dead grandparents (who died long before we made our deal).

I will love my baby no matter what he/she is called, but I desperately don’t want to name my baby Sharon or Nigel.

AITA for not wanting to name my baby after my husband’s dead grandparents? AITA for caring so much about the name? Does baby’s name even matter as long as we love it? Am I being selfish? ######

Response: NTA.  Only those involved in the making of or squeezing out of the baby get a say in the name. ######


Prompt:
So I (25M) am covered in visible burn scars everywhere except my face neck and back and I also have a prosthetic leg for my left leg which is from the thigh downwards. These are from 2 separates: a house fire when I was a kid and a car crash was the leg when I was 20.

Anyway, it’s warm here so I was just doing my once a week shop and I left in a pair of shorts, a shirt and a hoodie. I walked to the store and when I got there, I did some shopping and I decided to take my hoodie off because I got too hot. My legs were on full display so everybody could notice my prosthetic and my burn scars and they saw more scarring when my bare arms were exposed. I’ve been used to looks for years so it’s not really an issue and I didn’t think it would be.

I got to the checkout and there was a huge line and this old woman said that I was traumatising her and other people with having my hoodie off. Nobody else was saying anything except her and I ignored her initially but she kept telling me I needed to at least put my hoodie back on as it was incredibly off putting to see my visible scarring.  I was getting really annoyed and I didn’t want to say anything to be an ass but she didn’t let up, continually calling me inconsiderate and it got so much that I asked the guy in front of me if I could skip in line and he said yes.

I got home and tried to block out the old woman’s comments but they’ve really gotten to me. I could have easily put my hoodie on and just been hot and saved people from more than they needed to see.

So AITA? ######

Response: NTA.  Of course you are NTA! This story broke my heart.  How selfish of the woman to say she was traumatized by the sight of some scars.  It’s not like you ran around shirtless screaming “LOOK AT ME!” You should not feel ashamed at all if someone is upset/not used to seeing a different body ######


Prompt:
Me and my husband are trying for a baby right now and his parents know about it. They told my sister in law I guess, we don’t have a bad relationship even tho we live far away, we still talk. She called me and brought up the baby topic, asked me if we were really trying and I told her yes. She asked “why now? There’s a huge pandemic going on and it’s kinda selfish bringing baby into all of this mess”, I told her that we have been trying for months already. She sarcastically asked why couldn’t we wait for a year or two and why was having a baby right now so fucking important. I just told her to kind her own business and hung up.

Of course 2 days later there’s a post on her Facebook about “selfish people not caring about anything other than their stupid wants and needs.” She told her parents about it too and they’re telling me that I was a bit too harsh and I need to apologize. ######

Response: NTA.  Nobody should be passing comments on other people’s legitimate life choices. ######


Prompt:
This is a weird one, sorry in advance. This was 5 months ago and it’s still a fight my bf and I are having. Clearly since pregnancy and miscarriages aren’t easy topic for people to talk about, I’ve come here.

I (27F) was about 6 weeks pregnant when I started bleeding really heavily randomly. To cut a long story short - I was miscarrying. Didn’t know I was pregnant, wasn’t upset about it. It was really whatever. I have no intention of children, I guess the shot failed me.

They sent me home from the hospital after a mental health check to make sure I was okay. Like I said, wasn’t upset about it, didn’t bother me much besides the physical pain obviously. They gave me the pill that helps to move the process along faster at home instead of waiting. When I was at home and sitting on the toilet, I felt it like fall out. So I just kind of look at for awhile and said “I didn’t think I would be able to see it!” (it was in the sac I think?) My boyfriend then said “stop being so fucking weird about this.” He then accused me of wanting to KEEP IT. When I said “it’s just curiosity, this is new to me too.” He stormed off and said he doesn’t want to be with someone who could be so heartless as not to care about this and treat “him” like a science project.

I asked him if he wanted to be pregnant or have kids and he said no but I should “respect” his kid more than that. I told him it’s happening to me and we just feel different about it. I wasn’t trying to be insensitive, I said sorry at the time but he hasn’t let it go.

Was I the asshole? It was something that was just happening to me and I was curious about it. He’s never hinted he’s wanted to kids or pro life of anything so this attitude is new to me. ######

Response: NTA.  No one gets to tell you how you should feel about a miscarriage. ######


Prompt:
Well I want to keep it short: I have a little backyard and since it's starting to get warm I like to sit there in my chair and read, without a shirt on.
Some years ago I got a turned cross with a Pentagram tattoed on my chest/ribs (don't want to explain why, it was simply my decision as some others have normal crosses tattooed and NO im not satanic).

Well my older neighbor lady likes to watch people doing stuff in their backyards from her window on the second floor. Yesterday she came over and asked me to put a shirt on, since it's disturbing and "not normal". Because of the way she said that to me I said that I won't do it and it's not normal either to stalk people doing stuff in their own garden.
She got upset and even said she will call the police, wich she didn't at the end.

Am I the asshole now because of the way I reacted? ######

Response: NTA.  Neighborhood spy’s are a pain. Better not to give in and good to remind that her own behavior is anti social. Nothing wrong with relaxing in your own space. ######


Prompt:
My girlfriend (28F) and I (30F) live together for over a year now. She is currently packing for a week-long camping trip with her dad and brothers and was charging up both of my external battery packs. I told her I didn’t want her taking both. She can take the older smaller one but the big one is expensive and she has a history of not taking care of my stuff (and taking my stuff without asking). I said I don’t want the charger to go camping and she threw a fit saying it’s not fair because of I’m not using it then she should be able to take it. I said if she wants one then she should get her own, that I’m being nice by even letting her take one.
She says since we live together we share everything and she should be allowed to take whatever she wants. Now she’s throwing a huge fit.
It feels like maybe I’m being mean now and I should just let her take it. But I’m annoyed that I’m expected to just let her have my things for use whenever she wants.
AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA.  My husband and I have been married for over 40 years and we ASK before we leave the house with something that the other purchased.  Also, her being careless with your belongings is an acceptable reason to not lend to her.

But now you have a great gift idea for her if you dare! ######


Prompt:
  So I was out for a walk today (something I frequently do) and I have both of my dogs, they're very fluffy so never tempting to pet. However they are attached to their family so they like those people but if I stranger approaches they will bark and if you run they will probably tackle you (they're not trying to be aggressive they are herding dogs it's what they do) so I just keep that in mind and don't let strangers try and pet them.

  While I was walking two children ran up to me, a boy and a girl they looked around four mabye five. They asked if they could pet my dog, of course I said "no, they really don't like to be pet" Then pleading ensued and I  just repeated my previous answer. They children then ran back to (what I believe) was their mother. And starting talking to her about me(I couldn't hear but they were pointing) They mother and the now smug looking children came back and the mother preceeded to yell at me about not allowing her kids to pet my dogs."kids like to pet dogs they should get to pet them" and "not everyone can own a dog those who can afford dogs should allow others to pet them" (this is kinda odd because I live in a more expensive gated area that you can't just get into,so the arg coming from another resident seems strange)

Yeah I know that logically I made the right decision I didn't want my dogs scaring her children and then having more problems, not to mention social distancing which they would have been voilating. I ended up just putting my hand up to stop her and walking away. I feel like I've done something wrong though, I don't get yelled at like that often and am generally well liked, so maybe I deserved it. Am I the Asshole ? ######

Response: NTA.  My comeback is “well not every dog likes to be pet.  Sorry that your kids feeling are hurt but I would rather than then an accident happening where your kids are physically hurt.” ######


Prompt:
Ever since my (28M) gym closed a few months ago, I've developed a pretty well-stocked home gym in my garage. The only problem is my garage is terribly lit, dim, and depressing. I've been working out with the door open for natural light, usually early in the mornings when nobody's out.

Yesterday I slept in pretty late, and only got to working out at 11. 15 minutes in, my neighbor who was doing gardening work across the street yelled over that I should "quit showing off"

I put on a tank top (I'd just been wearing leggings up to that point) and partially closed the garage door, but she sighed and shook her head on and off until she went inside.

AITA here? I was behind a bookshelf most of the time and I didn't think she'd see me. ######

Response: NTA.  Maybe she was hitting on you? ######