Prompt:
This happened a couple years ago, but I recently remembered that it happened and can't stop thinking about if I was in the wrong.

I (20F) had just finished work and decided to grab a drink at Starbucks before catching my train home. Two girls (I'm assuming college age) walked in right after me, and as I was waiting in line I noticed that one of the girls was looking at me.

She noticed me look back her at her and she asked "What's your name?"

I was already a little bit uncomfortable with her looking at me and my name is a bit unique - which would make me easier to find online so I instead of answering I asked "Why?"

She started telling me about how I kinda looked like someone in her class at one of the nearby colleges. I explained that I didn't attend that college so it couldn't be me and I thought that would be the end of the conversation.

Instead she started saying I was being rude by not telling her my name and that giving someone your name when they ask is common decency. I told her I was sorry, but continued to not tell her my name. At this point her friend, who had been on the phone the entire time, finished her call and this girl started telling her about how rude I was being.

Meanwhile, it was my turn to order (I ended up using a random name for my order) and I managed to escape with my drink.

So AITA? Was I being rude? ######

Response: NTA - It's your choice to tell somebody your name. ######


Prompt:
So I'll keep this short and sweet because it's so dumb.

2 neighbors and I share a driveway because we're in townhouses. We each have our own little garden along it. One of my neighbors have started driving through mine while reversing into their garage and killing my gnomes. I tried to talk to them about it but the wife had a go at me for taking photos of her kids (I didn't even have a phone out). Also, they have plenty of space to reverse in because I do it with my own garage, and this only started around Christmas after almost 2 years of living here

After that they started putting the kids bikes in my garden, so I've been pushing them back against their garage door.

My garden isn't that great, but it's my property, and I like having gnomes and lawn ornaments in it because it's just some fun.

So WITBA if I started to add those little metal decorative fence/edge things to keep them out? Possibly killing a tire of a bike or car? ######

Response:
 NTA - it's very inconsiderate of them.

In a similar situation, my neighbour ran a daycare and every morning one of the moms would drive over my garden and crush my plants. I asked her not to, my neighbour asked her not to, and each time she'd stop for a day or so and then it would start again.

So I replaced my crushed lavender with tall decorative grass hiding a big fucking rock.

She drove through the grass and cracked her bumper on the rock. ######


Prompt:
I (22F) have been living on my own for about 2 years now, but moved back in with my mom to save money during this time.

When I live alone or with roommates, I rarely ever think about what I eat on a daily basis. But when I’m home, my mom is constantly asking what I’m eating or offering up “healthier” suggestions and I’ve found I feel very anxious eating at her house. She also does this to my sister (21F) and has been a lot worse to her than me in the past. She put my sister on Weight Watchers in like 6th grade. My sister just recently found medical records from that time saying she was not considered overweight until high school.

My mom has a history of bulimia and has been pretty weird about food ever since then. She’s always buying elixirs and protein powders and sugar alternatives and trying to make her food “healthier”.

This morning as I was making my coffee (French press with oat milk) she said that I really should let her make me one of her “coffee drinks” with beef collagen and adaptogens and whatever other shit she was gonna throw in there. Granted, I had not had my coffee yet but I went OFF on how adding processed alternatives to substitute real foods is not “healthy” and the way she micromanages our eating is pretty messed up.

My brother (18M) stepped in and said I was being unusually harsh to my mom and that she doesn’t care what we eat. Of course he thinks that, he’s a “growing boy” in her mind and she doesn’t treat his eating the same as she does my sister and mine.

My sister didn’t want to get into the argument because she didn’t want to bring up poor feelings from our moms bad ED days and overall upbringing.

AITA for calling her out?

tl;dr my mom has an unhealthy relationship with food that she projects onto my sister and I. I finally called her out on it today. ######

Response: NTA - It's very concerning that your mother is pushing her residual eating disorder thinking onto you and your sister. Maybe you should sit her down and as kindly as possible have a conversation with her about that. Ignoring the problem, contrary to popular belief, does not make it go away. ######


Prompt: All my life I've babysat people when it comes to hanging out. I'll ask, they'll say "I'll get back to you" or "sure maybe next week" or some such thing, and then days will go by and I hear nothing up until the last minute or don't hear anything at all. Recently I decided I'm done doing that. If they don't give me concrete plans or even something like "sure I'm free this weekend or "I think I'm free Monday and Tuesday, let me check and make sure" or something specific like that I just assume we're not hanging out and make other plans. Well recently what I've always feared happening happened. Somebody actually did get back to me at the last minute and I had already made plans with someone else who actually gave me specific plans and information to plan my week off of. This person is upset because I was like "I'm sorry but you didn't give me anything specific and you waited till the last minute to let me know". Am I the asshole for for not putting my whole week and life on hold while I wait for someone to get back to me? ######

Response: NTA - It's rude of them to leave you hanging until the last minute.  If they don't give you a specific reason for the last minute yes or no, then it sounds like they're waiting for a better offer to come along or waiting to see if they're in the mood to hang out.  Like if you had asked if they wanted to do something and they said, 'yeah, but I have x going on, so I won't know if I'm free until the day of' then that's one thing, but radio silence until the last minute is disrespectful of your time and would make anyone feel bad and undervalued as a friend. ######


Prompt:
I've dated a girl for a few months. I'm her first since her husband of 2 weeks died a year ago this July.
She wants to bring this kid along, but doesn't want her husband's family to know she's dating, so we can't flirt, hold hands, kiss etc. with him around.

Because of that, I said we can't bring him unless she can tell him about us. She can't tell him, but already promised the kid he'd join us. I told her she'd have to go without me if she's gonna bring him.

It might be worth to mention she's got a couple of friends with us to disguise the fact that she's travelling with her new boyfriend.

So, am I the asshole here, or is my decision fair? ######

Response: NTA - it's not much of a vacation if you spend it hiding your relationship. ######


Prompt:
My GF (30f) and I (29m) have been together for 8 years. She recently made some new friends online. She is now asking if one of her new friends (18m) can move in with us.

For a little background, without going too deep, my girlfriend is on disability and cant really leave our home on her own. I, by and large, am the breadwinner of the household. However, we consider both incomes shared money. I make a decent living, but not great and money still gets tight.

We currently live in a one bedroom apartment and would need to move to a two bedroom in the same building to accommodate her friend. Her friend lives with his parents in another state and is the subject of abuse.

She says she knows this friend really well, albeit through online and phone interactions, but I don’t at all.

AMITA, that after considering the whole situation I still can’t get get behind him coming to stay with us?

Edit: To clarify a few things that have been mentioned, she met the guy via online games. The abuse is physical and verbal, she has heard it over the phone. According to the friend it is pretty extreme abuse, full punches etc... ######

Response: NTA - It's awful that her friend is going through abuse, but if you don't feel comfortable with it (and I understand why you wouldn't, this person is a stranger), then your girlfriend is wrong for pushing you. Especially since you'd have to get a whole new apartment for it. Your girlfriend should look into any other resources - other people/friends who might have spare rooms, possible shelters, etc. ######


Prompt:
My fiancé has been jobless for almost an entire year now. I am currently working two jobs (roughly 65 hours a week) and am frequently exhausted when I get home. With our current situation, I have asked that she do most of the cleaning because I usually don’t have the time to do it properly and I don’t want to live in a pig sty.

I don’t ask her to do everything and I don’t ask her to clean up after me. I do my own dishes and what is in the sink while I’m doing my own, I take out the trash on my way out, and I do a load (or more) of laundry every day. I leave at 6am most mornings and don’t get home until around 7-8 every night.

With this being said, I’ve talk to her and ask her to do a few things here and there to get things together. She always argues with me that she shouldn’t be doing all the cleaning and normally I would agree. HOWEVER, she sits at home all day and does nothing but watch tv or play games while I am working my ass off to support the both of us until she can find a job! When she gets one I can loosen my hours so I’m not working so much and it will go back to equal amounts of chores. AITA??

Also for clarification, this isn’t some sexist bs, we are both female.

Tl;Dr my unemployed (not COVID-19 related) fiancée complains about having to do most of the cleaning while I’m working two jobs to support the both of us. ######

Response: NTA - it wouldn’t be sexist if you were a male either. She is a mooch. ######


Prompt:
This happened in March before bars got shut down. It was the night of my staff party. I (25f) had invited my cousin (18f) a month before and she said she will come. Day of she cancelled. So I went with my brother (23) instead. We arrived and were having a good time when she showed up. The event coordinator talked to me about only being allowed one guest. It was embarrassing, but the coordinator let my cousin stay.
It was an open bar, and around 11pm my brother and I were a bit tipsy. Our cousin doesnt drink. She informed me she wanted to come home with me and sleep over.
My brother and I got into a disagreement. We didnt cause a scene or anything. We went to the lobby. I started crying and said I'm leaving. My cousin knew I was leaving. I went to the sidewalk and called a cab. The lobby was all glass so she could see me waiting at the curb. But she was talking to my brother so I assumed she wanted to stay with him.
I got home and fell asleep. The next morning I woke up to angry texts from my sister, my gramma, and my cousins dad accusing me of abandoning my cousin downtown at night. They were mean text messages. She had told them I abandoned her downtown at night.
1. She knew I was leaving and didnt come with me.
2. I waited 15 mins for a cab to come (Friday night) and she never came outside to wait with me.
3. She had money for a cab
4. She was with my brother who lives close to her.
5. There was an underground train station a block away from the bar that would've taken her practically all the way home. Which I understand is dangerous for a young girl at night. See number 3.
6. Her dad is overprotective, and would've 100% picked her up if she asked.
7. If my older sister did this to me when I was 18, none of my family members would care.
She ended up sharing a taxi with my brother. Her dad hasnt spoke to me since this happened and my gramma and sister havent forgiven me. AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA - it woulda been different if your brother weren't there, but he was. You didn't leave her by herself. She wasn't in danger.

Yea, you coulda double checked with her, but the most people should be angry about is you abruptly changing plans (she mentioned staying with you) ######


Prompt:
I have a new roommate in a share house. There's a few of us here, all young adults.

My new roommate wants to give music lessons to children and I said no.

I said no mainly because I am uncomfortable with having children at the house. This is a young adults share house where we all study and work. We are often home during the day, have boyfriends and girlfriend's over, have sex and so on.

It seems inappropriate to bring children into this environment.

I also have noise concerns, as the rest of us are often home during when these lessons would be, trying to study and relax.

But my main issue I don't really like kids, I don't think it's appropriate for kids to be around strange adults coming and going and I don't want kids hanging around my house.

AITA for saying no to the music lessons? ######

Response: NTA - it would be deeply inappropriate for someone to bring a string of random children into this type of home. Your roommate doesn’t have access to background checks for every person there and doesn’t know what (if any) screening process the landlord uses. It’s also okay to just plain not care for kids. Plus it would be irresponsible parenting to bring kids into a home with a rotating cast of random adults. It’s a recipe for disaster. ######


Prompt:
Reddit,

I need a sanity check.

I got someone who bought a AIO pc that's obviously not for gaming, they offered me a lower than asking price, by a lot, and I accepted. WCGW (paid 350 from 600 asking if anyone is curious)

its been less than 12 hours since we exchanged and they are now crying for a refund because... you guessed it, it doesn't play video games.

before anyone decides to be a wiseguy, the PC is completely functional and the display is flawless (no dead pixels). They even admitted over text that they don't want it anymore because it doesn't play any games.

its got an i3, 8gb of ram and a 256gb ssd. On one side, I don't want to because there's no way to prove they didn't tamper with it (ad was deleted off letgo as soon as it was handed off so I can't even prove the original specs I sold it with), on another side, I don't really care about buyers remorse.

AITA if I lowkey don't want to refund the person and .... don't? ######

Response:
 NTA - it was up to the buyer to question specs, ability to play game prior to purchase. As long as it was working when you put it out the door, it is no longer your responsibility.

If you want to be nice, you can take it back but you are not obligated. If they don't want it, they can put it back up for sale. ######


Prompt:
I have always been a fairly small guy, and at 5'8 weighed about 125 lbs. I was also fairly weak for a while. My girlfriend often teases me about this (completely jokingly, she means no harm by this at all) as she has been lifting regularly for over a year now, and was definitely stronger than me.

Recently the teasing has been getting more frequent, so just to spite her, I've been using the extra time in quarantine to start lifting with a few dumbbells in the house. It's been a bit over a month and although I'm still below average strength, I've overtaken my girlfriend in the amount of weight we can lift.

I can tell that this slightly upset her and she asked me that now that I've proven my point am I going to stop lifting. The thing is now that I've begun this journey, I actually really enjoy the routine and the process.

My girlfriend thinks that I'm an asshole because I did all of this just to get back at her, and though I did start with that intention, that is no longer my motivation.

AITA for lifting just to make a point and then not stopping? ######

Response: NTA - it was almost an “everyone sucks” because this is all so petty, but she’s gone too far by wanting you to stop now that you’ve found you genuinely like it. Her insecurity is preventing her from supporting you. ######


Prompt:
Ok, soooo the other night I was on my way to meet my girlfriend, he place is a 20 minute walk from mine if I cut through a park near her house, I like the walk especially on warm nights.

Anyway it was kinda late but I told my gf I was heading over and sent her a message as I was walking out the door.

I was 5 minutes into my walk and approaching the park when I noticed a woman walking too, she kept looking back at me I could tell I was making her uncomfortable. She made her way into the park, I knew if I had also “followed” her into the park I’d terrify her. Even though I knew I had no ill intentions, I know I can be intimidating I’m 6’3, and even if I wasn’t I know that a man walking near a woman at night would scare her.

So I decided to walk the long way. When I got to my gfs I explained why I was late, and she told me I should’ve just cut through the park and to have overtaken the woman, and then went on to say “you could’ve kept an eye out for her just in case someone actually bad was in the park” which made me think damn maybe I made the wrong decision. ######

Response: NTA - it was actually considerate of you to do that and your gf can wait a little, if you can help someone feel less anxious ######


Prompt:
My family all says I am being an asshole for this but I think they are just too non confrontational but I will leave it to the internet to decide so here is the story.

Background 9 years ago my cousin got married to his his highschool sweetheart after she graduated community college. They had been living together and my cousin did not go to college as he was supporting her through college. She is accepted into a  school in (no fault state) so off they move. They have a child which He takes care of and works nights to send his wife to school. In her final years she gets a job in her field under one of her professors.  Right after graduation she tells him that she wants a divorce she has been sleeping with her boss/professor for 2 years and now that she is no longer her teacher he is leaving his wife and they are getting married. ending their 7 year marriage. I was not informed of any of this to call her out at the time I was never actually told of the divorce just my parents told me to save the date for same cousins marriage then they told me what went down

So comes our story cousin was having a rough time of it after the divorce but eventually ran into his middle school crush they hit it off. They invite family to second wedding and put an engagement announcement on facebook. Bitch Ex wife sees the announcement and post, "He is such a bad father He did not even ask his child if it was okay for him to get married again how will this affect her?"

so I responded in a PM "Did you ask kidsname if it was okay with them if you cheated on daddy and  slept with your boss then divorce daddy? how do you think that will affect her?"

family is mad when she contacted them. am i the asshole? ######

Response: NTA - it was a private message so it’s not like you called her out publicly. She is only mad because you stated the truth. ######


Prompt:
Hey guys! This is my first time posting on AITA so please bear with me....

First a bit of context... I was planning on getting married this October but have no idea if that is still going to happen due to the lockdown that's going on

So I (29yo F) was on the phone to my mother this morning discussing plans for a "Virtual Birthday party" for me for next week (basically a group video chat with family) and we got on talking about how because of the quarantine that all my families birthdays have been pretty much cancelled this year.

I really wanted to do something special as it's my 30th but will happily settle with just a call, I suggested that we could set up like a Family birthday party after quarantine to celebrate everyone's birthdays. My mum then responds with "well we will see if we can, maybe we can do a joint birthday call next week as your SILs birthday is 2 days after yours and you were planning to get married this year so we can all just celebrate them at the reception" I was deeply hurt and angry by this as
1. my birthday has always been over shadowed as my SIL is a few days after mine and therefore I've had to have joint parties/gatherings for years, I dont usually mind but this is a big birthday and all my 'big' birthdays have eaither been ruined or shared, and
2. that my wedding day is supposed to be about my hubby and me! I told my mum that in no way, shape or form will I be sharing my wedding reception with birthday celebrations for everyone else, it's my big day, and one that I've been waiting on for years, I wont be upstaged on my wedding day"
She got kind of huffy and said well it's not often all the family is together and that we will "just see what happens" now I love my mother and my SIL dearly but this has really struck a nerve.... but still I cant help wondering AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA - it takes some serious balls to tell your own daughter that her wedding isn’t about her. Wow. That isn’t just an asshole thing to say, it’s mega-asshole.

ETA - talk to whoever will be in charge of the mic at the reception. Let them know that if the word birthday or covid is uttered the mic is to be immediately cut off and attention redirected. Make sure the planner, event location management, caterer, or whoever know that all birthday cakes supplied by family are for the staff to consume, preferably immediately, or deposited on the trash. ######


Prompt:
I am 20, living with my parents and at the moment I am the only person in my house working; my parents and younger brother have been staying home. I’ve made it a point to ONLY leave the house if I’m going to work or to do something alone, like go on a walk. We were all tested for COVID on Tuesday and all results came back negative.

The part of the state we are living in has not gone into “Phase 2” yet but it should be happening soon. Part of Phase 2 includes hair salons opening up. I am naturally brunette but have been blonde for the past few years and my hair isn’t looking it’s best but obviously there is much worse shit going on in the world so it’s not a big deal in the slightest.

However, my dad told us today that his friend, who he hasn’t seen in like 2 months, might be coming over tomorrow. My mom and I were obviously like wtf because we’ve all done our best to socially distance and stuff and his friend coming over is a stupid move imo. So, I told him that I’m going to schedule a hair appointment (my hair girl texted me and said she’ll be opening up as soon as phase 2 starts) as soon as I can and my dad started telling me that I’m being stupid, my hair can wait, etc. I told him I could say the same thing about his friend coming over— they haven’t seen each other in 2+ months so they can wait. This all turned into a big disagreement. I don’t see an issue with me going to get my hair done when the governor says it’s okay to do so. AITA? ######

Response: NTA - It seems your dad doesn’t see how bringing his friend over and you getting your hair done is essentially the same. ######


Prompt:
I don't know if this is too small stakes for this sub but it's been an issue in my immediate family and I want to know if I'm in the wrong.

I proposed seven months ago with a $4000 ring. About four months ago I noticed she stopped wearing her engagement ring and I asked her why. She said she didn't want to lose it so she keeps it in a jewellery box hidden away for special occasions. I didn't press further.

I found out a month ago that while this is technically true, she has told me she doesn't know where the jewellery box is. She doesn't have much jewellery so she told me it's literally just a ring box, not one of those bigger fixtures you might think when you think about jewellery boxes. She said she was actively looking for it.

A week ago it got to a heated discussion about the ring where I tell her I'm disappointed she's lost it. She tells me she did not in fact lose it, but misplaced it. To me, that means the same thing. She said she hasn't had time to look for it but knows she didn't lose it (???).

Now I bring it up every day, asking her if she found the ring. The answer is always no. She is getting mad at me and getting her parents to put pressure on me to drop it. She "doesn't want to be reminded of it". If I was in her shoes and I lost literally the most expensive thing I own, I'd be frantically looking for it, not taking this laissez-faire approach. I mean, I wouldn't have lost it anyways: I would have known where it is at any moment on any day. You don't just lose something that's $4000, right? The longer it takes for her to find it, the less likely she's going to find it, right?

Am I the asshole here? ######

Response: NTA - it seems like she just doesn't want to discuss it, maybe thinking the problem will just go away if you don't mention it. This is a huge red flag, if she's this careless about a $4,000 ring, what does that say about her? I'd try and set a date where you guys both go over her place to try and find it....hopefully it'll still be there ######


Prompt:
I (10 M cat) was sleeping very comfortably in my owners' (36 M, 31 F) bed with them one evening when I suddenly had the urge to swat the guy with my paw a number of times and tickle him with my tail. For some reason he didn't take kindly to this, so he kicked me out of the bed, as he does many nights. He's a very mean person in this respect.

So I naturally then just do my thing. Fifteen minutes later my owners' son (3 M) comes into their bed asking if he can sleep with them. The guy tells him he doesn't think it's early morning yet, and starts to help the kid back to bed, when he notices the kid is covered in pee. Naturally he thinks it was a bedtime accident, and so takes him to the bathroom to change his pajamas, give him a bath, and gently explain that he should be more careful about going to the bathroom before bedtime, but it's ok. The kid for some reason doesn't take kindly to second bath at 2AM with really bright lights  while half-asleep, hearing about bathroom time yet again, and is very upset. After calming him down, the guy takes the kid to the couch so he could change the sheets....when he discovered there's no way the kiddo could have made such a big mess, and it clicked why the underwear wasn't even that wet.

I'll own up to it: it was me. I peed in the kids bed. I was just so angry at being kicked out of their bed! But all of this could have been avoided if he just ignored my pawing and tickling, and let me have like a third of the bed to myself with him as a toy. Really, it's on him.

AITA? ######

Response: NTA - it is your right as a cat (and therefore lord and master of the universe) to do as you wish. ######


Prompt:
I know the title sounds absolutely ridiculous and to be honest the situation is actually ridiculous so I’ll try my best to explain.

Me, my sister and her boyfriend are currently renting a house together, we all do our part and we all equally pay the rent.

The house we are renting has a fucking massive backyard.

Well one day, I was sat in the yard drinking my coffee when I had an epiphany.

I want to order a bouncy castle for my 21st birthday in a couple days time.

Yes I’ll be 21 and yes it is incredibly childish of me but god dammit we’re in quarantine and I want to do nothing more than get drunk hop on a bouncy castle and jump to my hearts content.

I am a massive fucking child I know.

I told my sister about the idea and she’s completely against the idea. She told me that it’s  immature and the only person who will get enjoyment out of my birthday will be me and that her and her boyfriend won’t enjoy it

I know for a fact that her boyfriend would love it and she’s a god dam liar.

But every time I look into the garden, all I see is the potential it has to have a wicked bouncy castle in it. My sister also claims that I’ll be embarrassing myself to the neighbours when they look out the window and see a 21 year old girl having the time of her life on a bouncy castle.

Money also isn’t an issue either and we are all thankful to have jobs and I do have the money to spare.

So, will I be the asshole if I go ahead and live my bouncy castle dreams? ######

Response: NTA - it is your birthday, and if she doesn't want to have fun, let her sit in the house and pout like a 5 year old. ######


Prompt:
My boyfriend \[29M\] and I \[23F\] have been together for 4 months but known each other a few years. He earns roughly double what I do and lives in a nice apartment by himself, I have a nice enough apartment with 2 housemates. His apartment is a lot closer to our respective workplaces than mine and as a result of this we've always tended to spend more time at his place.

Last night he was in a fairly irritable mood anyway, then later on in the evening he suddenly told me rent is due next week and I need to transfer him half. This really took me aback as although we have briefly discussed moving in together in the past we've never spoken about me moving into his place or paying him rent. I thought it was an unspoken understanding that I absolutely **cannot** afford half his rent and so if we were to move in together we'd both have to move.

I thought about it and I admit I have been back to my own place only twice in the past two weeks but I've never received any impression from him that I've overstayed my welcome, and we've hung out together in that time when we're not working. In the past when he's mentioned he's having friends over I've stayed away unless he's invited me into those plans. Also, I do the majority of the cooking for us and tend to buy the groceries for that, and we take it in turns paying for dates but he probably does pay more in total.

I just kept quiet when he mentioned it last night (it was already pretty late so I didn't go home) as he was already in a bad mood and I felt like he was pushing for an argument, then I went back to my own place after work today.

I realise that he obviously feels that I have overstepped a boundary in the amount of time I've spent at his but I honestly did not realise before now. AITA for not feeling like I should have to pay half his rent this month? This is the first I've heard of the issue, and also I would *really* struggle to do so. ######

Response: NTA - it doesn’t sound like there was an agreement for you to pay half his rent. I would probably sleep at home from now on if I were you. ######


Prompt:
Just as the title says.

I have a family full of health-nut anti-vaxxers. My cousin in Australia just had a baby and is very vocal about the fact that she is not vaccinating. I am not immuno-compromised but I have many friends who are, and I feel like it's the right thing to do so as to not spread anything to people that I care about. I have my vaccinations, I am at very low risk, and I guess I'm feeling guilty because I am technically safe to meet her baby.  I felt very confident in my decision at first but now the backlash from my family has me second guessing myself. ######

Response: NTA - It doesn't matter that you're safe, you can still be a vector, also i seriously agree to any measure to discourage non-vaxxers, we have to state as loud as we can that this is not an ideology that has any right to be respected and that she's putting a lot of people in danger by doing this. ######


Prompt:
So I recently moved to the UK and I rebound my keyboard dollar sign to £. I’m on mobile now so I can easily type both. I’m from America, and I usually talk to my mom through Facebook on my computer.

Now this is a really stupid argument, which I’ll probably give in to just to keep the peace but anyway. When I was talking to my mom I mentioned I bought a new toaster, and said it was £30. She got mad and said to only use $ when talking to her. I said that my keyboard uses £ now and I use British currency in my everyday life, so why would I use $? She said when I’m talking to her I should use American dollars because I’m talking to an American.

AITA if I keep using £? I probably won’t because it’s my mom but still. This isn’t normal right lol? ######

Response: NTA - it didn't cost $30, it cost £30 which would convert to a different number. ######


Prompt:
I’m gonna be the first person to say that this is beyond pathetic

I’ve recently moved in with my boyfriend and we got a puppy (great dane) who we named Ralph. We’ve wanted a dog forever and had picked a few names a while ago but I knew ultimately that I would want Ralph

My brother and his wife had asked us what we were gonna call him and I mentioned a couple of picks (including Ralph) and they both said that they were cute choices

We got Ralph two weeks ago and officially announced on Facebook that he’d “joined our family” and that his name was indeed Ralph. My SIL text me the next day saying she couldn’t believe I stole the name that she wanted for her dog. I actually laughed out loud and in response because I thought she was joking around. She followed it up with how “stupid” it would be to have two dogs in the family that are called the same name. I didn’t reply and she hasn’t spoken to me since haha

When my brother came round to see my puppy, he said that she didn’t want to come because she was ‘furious’ with me but he told her it was stupid and that they weren’t even getting a dog, let alone even discussed wanting one! She was also mad with him for coming round because he “was taking my side”

AITA for calling my puppy Ralph which apparently my SIL wanted for her dog? ######

Response: NTA - it always makes me sad to see another story about a child bride, married off before she even got to grow up. ######


Prompt:
I(19F) got a summer job at a caffè that is a part of an insurance and car company. My customers are basically the employees and their customers. All the employees get free drinks and they can treat whoever they want and so can I so yesterday my friend(17F) came by for a cup of coffee. She was sitting at the bar and chatting with me for almost 2 hours and when she left two male coworkers, let's call them Ben and Carl, sat down for a drink and started talking to me.
Ben(36M): Hey Carl, did you see that hot friend of hers that came by?
Carl(40+M): Yeah of course. She's pretty hot. Hey, OP, she's 20, right?
Me: No, Jesus Christ she is younger than me, she's still a minor.
Ben: Damn she has curves for someone her age.
I was disgusted beyond belief. Their conversation continued although they knew she is a minor..
I said to them that they are disgusting pigs because she could be their daughter(ironically, they both have young children). As my 2 female coworkers were sitting at the bar today, Carl also sat down for a drink but he sat down on my seat(that's the only place where I as a waitress can sit).
Me: Sorry but you're in my seat.
Carl: Oh, so you want me to get up?
Me: It's okay, you can stay if u want.
Carl: You know, when I was your age I would rather never sit down than disrespect someone older than me like you just have.
Coworker: Kids today are sadly nothing like we used to be.
I didn't say anything to them but God was I pissed off. You disrespect my MINOR friend, talk about her curves even though she is young enough to be your daughter and after all that you want to be treated with respect?? I don't think I'm the asshole here but apparently my female coworker thinks so. So, redditors, AITA? ######

Response: NTA - inform HR or their superior. The fact they would openly talk about this is in front of you is disturbing and crosses boundaries and shows a fundamental lack of knowledge of what appropriate behavior is. For your safety, your friends safety and any other unsuspecting children or women who might cross their paths please report them. ######


Prompt:
My wife and I live with our 4 kids in a house that is pretty close to our next door neighbors. A year ago, a new family moved in next door with their 3 kids.

Our property technically extends until about 5 feet from our neighbor’s physical house, so we have always used that land on that side as a place to park an extra car or whatever.

Our new neighbor put up a basketball hoop for their kid in the driveway so that when their kids played, they were inching on what was technically our property. We had no problem with that because who cares.

However, eventually our neighbors began parking their car in that land. We asked them to stop because 1) sometimes we park there and 2) our kids play wiffle ball all the time in the back yard and didn’t want cars that are not us pulling in and out without expecting our kids to run out and also 3) it’s our property and we really shouldn’t have to explain more than that.

When we asked them to stop parking there, they said they didn’t understand why we couldn’t share the land as it had room for 2 cars and all the kids run around there and nobody has cared before. They even said they would move a car from there if we ever needed the space upon request. We didn’t really want to go down that road.

When they continued to park there, one day we had a fence built on our property so that they could not longer park there and now their kids could no longer play basketball there (the second part was not our intention). We did not tell them we were building the fence beforehand and our neighbors freaked out saying we were being selfish.

AITA? ######

Response: NTA - in Texas there is the law of adverse possession.  (Essentially squatters rights) so you did what you needed done to protect your investment. ######


Prompt:
My wife and I just heard from our agent that we received a full price offer on our house within a week of listing.

What should be a happy occasion turned out to be a fight....

We’ve been working furiously to get the house in proper order to ensure a quick/full price sale. We’ve spent nearly $5k on painting, cleaning and upgrades.

Our to do list didn’t get finished by the time we went on the market, and there are a few detail jobs still left to be done. However, that didn’t prevent us from listing, and getting a full price offer quickly.

We were basking in the glow of this news tonight, when my wife told me that she still wanted to get the last few projects done to ‘clear my conscience’. I told her that I thought that was a waste of time, and that we’d already spent enough time/money/effort to get the result we ultimately wanted, which was a quick sale.

Am I the asshole for not wanting to spend more time, money, and effort when we’ve already achieved our goal? ######

Response: NTA - in fact, you would be the asshole if you went ahead with the projects unless it is something that is structurally wrong with the house.  For example - new countertops.  You could invest and put in the nicest (to your eye) countertops replacing the ones the buyer saw.  The buyer could then not like your taste and walk out of your deal.  I mean - perhaps they love the green Formica 1960s countertops! Or, perhaps they are going to upgrade your house when they purchase to their taste and have factored that into the price.  Don’t do anything further unless your house is literally broken and you cannot avoid it.  Even then, they will find this stuff in the inspection and you should negotiate the price for them to do it to their taste. ######


Prompt:
My mom and I had a pretty rocky relationship while I was growing up, but the past 5 years or so has been great and we talk on the phone almost every day.

Yesterday at 4 I called her to wish her a Happy Mother's Day, and she was short with me from the beginning. I asked her how she was and she admitted she was sad that she spent all day waiting for me to call. I explained that I had been busy, and I was worried earlier when I had free time that she would be sleeping. I spent about 5 minutes trying to talk with her, but she just kept giving me one word answers or not responding at all. At the very end when I gave up and asked to speak to my dad, she gave me a sarcastic "Oh, of course you want to talk to dad."

I thought things would be okay with a little time, but late last night I realized that I never updated my relationship status on Facebook. I didn't make a big post. I just changed the status, and even though it's viewable to friends, it's not showing up on everyone's timeline so it has gotten minimal attention. We've been married for months (a small ceremony with just us, our pastor, and the couple that mentored us) and all our close family and friends already know, but it's news to old high school and college friends, for example.

I woke up this morning to multiple messages from my mom written in the middle of the night about how could I be so hurtful, why do I have time for Facebook but not her, why couldn't I send her a card or a gift or do something special for one day, why did Mother's Day have to be the day I made the big announcement, etc.. AITA? ######

Response: NTA - If your mom didn’t already know you were married and that’s how she found out? Sure she could be upset. But the way it really went down is no big deal. Your mom is being a drama queen. ######


Prompt:
My gf went through a rough patch which involved some heavy drugs a few years back. When we got back together she promised to attend these AA/NA meetings at our church and go to therapy. Part of the therapy involved drug testing every 6 months. Well she stopped therapy awhile ago and has been unofficially living with me.

Today she sat me down and asked if she could move in. I said yes but on the condition she goes through a drug test. She completely went mad when she heard this. Saying that I'm an asshole for no trusting her and what nots. I get that she's trying to clean things up and she's been clean for a year but it's just a precaution.

Aita? ######

Response: NTA - If your GF was actually still in recovery, the thought of taking another drug test wouldn't phase her. She is using again and probably needs a new place to stay. ######


Prompt:
So my male (35) friend has a daughter (11) he isn't with her mother anymore and he gets to see his daughter maybe 4 days per fortnight.

I've stayed at his house before and noticed that his daughter insists on sleeping in the same room, or same bed as her dad. It gets to the point where she throws full on tantrums, with crying and hysterics because she claims she can't sleep unless she is sleeping with an adult. She apparently sleeps in the same bed as her mother every night.  So he generally gives in to stop her tantrums.

I find it really odd that she refuses to sleep in her own bed. I've never known another 11 year old that can't sleep in her own bed.

I've tried to talk to him about it very gently in the past but he blows off the conversation and makes excuses for her behaviour or blames it on her mother. His daughter is a very sensitive topic for him and he lashes out whenever someone comments on his daughters weird behaviour.

Would I be an asshole if I told him that it is not normal for an 11 year old to sleep in a bed with her dad and he needs to get her into therapy to address why she won't sleep in her own bed? ######

Response: NTA - if you do it politely and gently. But yeah, this sounds like very abnormal behavior. Realistically, when parents who were together aren't anymore, they should probably get their child in therapy even if they are well adjusted. So, yeah, he should definitely be considering therapy and not excusing the behaviors. ######


Prompt:
I’m an only child and so is my husband and we have a small house and kids. Our parents often put down our tiny, full house. My in-laws arrived shortly after we bought our house with furniture that didn’t fit in their condo even though our house is barely larger than their condo, I wasn’t consulted. My dad gave us an bunch of his furniture he didn’t want. Ok, free furniture, but there’s stuff I don’t like, like a giant chest filled with my MILs student art that must be kept and a case of ivories. I don’t want to be a person who has ivories. But now it’s starting to really irritate me. His house is at least double the square footage of mine with one person and thee unused rooms! And every time I see him he tells me to take more of my dead mom’s stuff, my dead grandma’s stuff. He pushed a big cross on me even though I’m not Christian and the gave it to my kid when I said no thanks. Today he called me and “offered” a large freestanding mirror that has been at my aunt’s house the decade+ grandma has been dead. “No thanks, I don’t have any space for it” and he gets angry. How it’s nice and “I guess she’ll give it to Goodwill”, sniff sniff. Now we have to provide homes for grandma’s stuff in other people’s houses? He has three unused rooms!
AITA for saying no and if they treasure this crap they can find room for it? ######

Response: NTA - if they wanted the items in the family, they’d keep them if you said no. An heirloom that’s been handed down again and again with sentimental meaning, I totally understand. Grandma’s old furniture? Nah fam. ######


Prompt:
So I took over care of a dog because the owners  thought she was too hyper and didn't want her because they didn't know how to train her to not be hyper so my friend suggested me because I am a dog lover and am good at training, they gave me the dog like the dog is mine completely the are never getting her back especially because in my opinion they were abusing her but that's a completely different story.

I tried calling the dog by the name they had given it Peanut, I tried for 3 days to get her to respond to it I couldn't get so much as an ear twitch she just wouldn't respond, so I tried calling her Honey she instantly responded if I called her Honey and asked her to sit she would do it right away if I called her from across the house calling her Honey she would come running. My friend who arranged for me to get the dog is saying that I shouldn't just change her name and that she's had that name for 3 years. As well as saying it's disrespectful to change the dog's name, I'm just at a loss for if I'm being unreasonable? I also asked that my friend please use the name Honey when refering to my dog because thats her name now. So am i the one being an asshole?

Since people keep asking here is Honey
My baby! https://imgur.com/gallery/bn8300N ######

Response:
 NTA - if the dog responds to it it works. It might take a while for your friend to not use Peanut, but you changed the dog's name, so now that dog is Honey.

Also, can we see Honey :) ######


Prompt:
I (21M) live with my mother (55) and younger sister (16), but I'll be moving out my partner in a month. I have a good relationship with my mother of mutual respect and collaboration, ever since my dad left, we've been a team in keeping the house afloat in term of finances and chores, however, with time, my mother has become messier and messier. What bothers me the most is that she leaves empty bottles, cans and egg shells in the kitchen sink.

I try to do my part but it's a big house and I work full time, I've talked to her multiple times about making my sister help around the house or hiring someone to clean if she's to tired to do things, but she always answers with "maybe" or "we'll see". We've been having ants, roaches and I've seen RATS in the kitchen, and I just get depressed and anxious being here, because I just really, REALLY hate living in this condition.

So one day I send a picture of egg shells and an empty can in the sink to the group chat (were my mother and the rest of my adult siblings are) with something like: "this is why have roaches" to which my siblings answered  with disgusted comments. After a while my mom came a cleaned the kitchen, so every time she leaves trash on the sink, I send a picture and she comes and cleans it. I don't like embarrassing my mother, but I'm tired of telling her that we'll get sick if she keeps leaving shit in the sink! My siblings have told me that I should let it go since I'm moving out soon, but that doesn't change the fact that my mother and my sister will keep living in a shithole if they don't clean more. AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA - If that's the only way to get her to not be a total slob, then I don't blame you.  I'm no neat freak, but at least I have the sense not to leave garbage lying around.

Should could also be depressed, too.  If this messiness is somewhat new, then something changed with your mom.  You should help her find a therapist, or someone should. ######


Prompt:
I'm an exec at a start-up, due to COVID we needed to lay some people off. Only about 5% of our staff and I was told to make a 1 cut in our operations and strat team. The person I chose to let go is named Sara and is like 23, and has been with us for a year.  On that team we have 5 people and a couple months back we had a happy hour and went to a bar with a bunch of people from our company. Sara got a little tipsy and I was walking by her and a couple of other women in the office on my way to the washroom at the bar when I heard her loudly say that she thinks I have the smallest dick in the office due to me being Asian and not having "big dick energy". This was pretty racist in my opinion but she and the other people didnt notice me pass by and hear this.

I didn't change my attitude towards her or anything in any way since then but when making the layoff today I laid her off because of it. It was basically the same to lay anyone off in the dept, they all work the same and are all talented on the same level and she's a good worker.

I told my buddy this and he just laughed his ass off but called me a bit of an asshole, but I don't think I am, she's racist and obviously you should be more coy about insulting the boss.

AITA? ######

Response: NTA - If she's not smart enough to watch what she says around her boss, that's reason enough to let her go. ######


Prompt:
My sister has recently created a new instagram account that she only lets her friends follow, I thought nothing of it but one of our mutual friends sent me a screenshot of the account.  It was nothing but posts about her talking shit about me, our cousin, and a couple of her other friends.  I went to confront my sister about this and basically told her if she has a problem with me she can say it to my face.  When I showed her the screenshot she said she can saw whatever she wants about me or anyone.  I told her to take down the posts or the account, and my sister told me that she won't do any of that.

My friend recently sent me another screenshot and it was her full on her going over the full conversation we had and her talking shit about me again.  I knew I wasn't gonna do shit so I straight up told my mom that she was making fun of me on an instagram account, my mom nearly tore her head off and she had to delete the account in front of her lol.

My sister called me a "fucking snitch" and said that I had to go get mommy to deal with her issues.  I just told her to not talk shit on me and this wouldn't have to happen. ######

Response: NTA - if she does it again, report her to Instagram for online harassment and cyber bullying. ######


Prompt:
 I (22F) got a job as a secretary-murse at a doctor's office to help my family while I study. I started there 2 weeks before the quarantine. During the quarantine, the doctor shut the office down by her choice as she was pregnant and afraid of getting the virus. She hadn't hired me yet (illegal) and didn't offer to hire me during the quarantine (so that I could take the stimulus check for people whose work closed).

 Fast forward to a week ago, she called me to demand me to answer the phones and make prescriptions while she would be in the hospital giving birth. I said I would cover her for those days despite not being ok with her not hiring or paying me. Now, those days have passed and she's back home and wants me to keep answering etc. Which means that it will take up too much time from my studying (we had agreed that during my exams and her delivery we would completely close the office, but she took advantage of the fact that the government now allows you to do online prescriptions). Additionally, she wants to reopen the office exactly when my first exam starts (my exams moved two weeks later, so her delivery is now over and my exams are starting).

 I told her that I don't want to keep answering the phone and I am not going back before the exams end. She completely changed her tone while talking to me and even asked me to do a prescription "if I can even do that being so busy". I feel like I don't owe her anything, especially since she hasn't hired me. AITA for leaving now, her having a newborn and c section healing? ######

Response: NTA - if she didn’t hire you how are you working for her? I’m confused ######


Prompt:
My stepson is 11 and at his school they have these annual events (father-son camping, mother-daughter cooking etc). Late last year they held a mother and son race where the mother had to run across the field and piggy back their sons back to the other side and then tie our legs together and just sprint back across.

A week prior my stepson Dylan was talking about it and how he thought it was ridiculous and embarrassing. When I looked at their poster for it, it looked fun so I convinced him to sign up for it. Later that day I called his mother Julie but she didn't pick up so I left a voicemail talking about the event and asking her to get back to us if she is available. Five days past and still no word from her. Being honest when she didn't respond, I saw it as an opportunity for Dylan and I to bond but since I respect Julie as his mother I sent her an email (doesn't use social media) with the poster and talking about how Dylan has signed up for it. Two days passed and still nothing. So I went to Dylan and told him that his mother hadn't gotten back to me but if he was okay with it, I was willing to step in since it was too late to pull out. He was a bit disappointed but still fine.

The day came and it was a blast. Tiresome but definitely worth it. It was just so much fun and I made a few friends there who were also stepmothers. And obviously we won 1st place and got two medals. Dylan also enjoyed it and feels way more comfortable with me now.

While I was browsing the school's website last week, I saw a picture from that day with me running and Dylan cheering on my back. It was a cute picture so I downloaded it and made it my profile picture. Turns out one of Julie's friends showed her the picture and now she's going on a rant about how I shouldn't have done that and how I've overstepped my mark as his step mother. When I told her I called her and sent an email she went on saying that I should've sent her a text or called her again instead of just once. AITA? ######

Response: NTA - if she didn't reply to one text or a mail, why would she respond to another one. Incredibly rude on her part to leave your messages unread. You stepped in when she let her son down and that's something your stepson will remember. Where's your husband in all of this, why is he letting his ex talk to you like this? ######


Prompt:
At my local grocery store, there are parking spots designated for pregnant/ new moms and veterans.

I’m about 32 weeks pregnant with twins, or 7 months for those of you who don’t speak pregnant. I had to go to the grocery store and as I was pulling up, I noticed one of those spots open and took it. As I was getting out of my car another car pulled up and told me I couldn’t park there because it was for veterans. I said it was for pregnant women and veterans, and I was one of those 2 so I could park there. Guy in the car essentially said I didn’t need to park there and he deserved it because he was a vet. He then pointed out some parking spots close by and told me to park there. I said I was already parked, out of my car and well within my right to park in a spot designated for both of us, and it wasn’t my fault I got to it first. I gestured to the parking spots he did and said he could park there, and walked around his car to enter the store. As I was walking in, a guy who heard the interaction told me I should have just moved and that he fought for our country, I could have given up the spot, and when I walked by the man from the car he said I was very rude.

I called my mom on the way home from the grocery store to tell her about the weird experience, and she agreed that I should have just moved, and now I kind of feel like a dick.

AITA? ######

Response: NTA - If it was for both pregnant people and vets, you could park there. You got there first, so you got the space. He can deal. ######


Prompt:
Long story short: My former roommate and I had a lot of issues. We're friends, but by the end of living together, I almost couldn't stand her. She expected me to be her mom - I bought all the groceries, cleaned, etc. She only paid 1/3 of the rent, and she has the maturity of a  teenager.

Living with her was detrimental to my mental/emotional health, my relationship, and my finances. She moved back in with her parents when the lease was up. I remained at the same apartment.

She's been begging me for the last few weeks to let her move back in because her situation at home isn't great. I've said no.

Today, I found out that she's living in her car, and I feel like an AH but I also don't want her to move back in. ######

Response: NTA - if it didn't work the first time, it's not going to work the 2nd time either. Her current living situation is unfortunate, but it's her problem to solve. ######


Prompt:
OK so back in August I got into a car accident. A woman ran a red light and hit the side of my car.
I went through the whole insurance claim process and she ended up denying fault. This cost me a lot of money to fix my own car as my insurance fought my claim.

Anyway, back to now. I got the news I won! The money was payed back but obviously I lost some money as a result.
I was talking with my dad whether or not we should sue, (which I wasn’t planning on) however my dad brought up that she probably already lost her license since she was already 80 years old at the time of the accident and this probably was the reason she fought so hard to deny fault.
Now I just feel bad. On one hand, the whole “she was 100% at fault and if she needed to lose her license because she was incompetent then she should”
But am I the asshole? At the end of the day I may have caused someone to lose their license??? It could’ve been an honest mistake. ######

Response:
 NTA - if it bothers you that she probably lost her licence, would it bother you if you didn't do anything and she then hit a child and killed them?
It would be the same as not reporting a drunk driver, just because they personally think they are good to drive doesn't make it the truth. ######


Prompt:
My best friend is getting married at the end of summer and he wants to do a haka to celebrate as a part of the ceremony. I am not Polynesian, Maori, Samoan, Tongan, Australian, Kiwi, etc, etc and my friend isn’t either. We said that if we did DNA tests and if either of us turned up anything from that area, we’d do it, but we both came up without anything there. AITA for this or am I being sensitive or too PC?

Edit: Neither bride or groom have heritage from there. ######

Response:
 NTA - If I were asked to do a ceremonial dance from a culture that has nothing to do with me? I would decline, even if I thought it would be fun/cool.
I wouldn't feel good or comfortable, and would definitely feel like I was appropriating someone's culture.

Why do you think your friend is so dead-set on doing a Haka, though? Is it just something he's really interested in or admires? ######


Prompt:
Alright, so my younger brother is 8, and is still unable to wipe his ass, and my parents don't see it as a problem. My mom went to the store earlier, and my dad was at work. My younger brother calls for me and says he took a shit. I called my mom asking what I should do, and she told me to try to help him, if not do it for him. I really feel uncomfortable touching my brother anywhere down there, or even looking at his privates, so me and my other brothers tried to coach him on how to do it. I might get in trouble if he gets a shit stain in his underwear, too. I've previously gotten into some heat with my dad about this too, as he wanted me to wipe him once, and I refused.

WIBTA for feeling uncomfortable and trying to avoid wiping my elementary aged brother's ass when my parents can't?

EDIT: For those of you asking, my brother has no disabilities, although there has been a rumor here and there about him being really high functioning on the autism spectrum ######

Response: NTA - If he's 8 and physically able to do so he should be able to wipe himself. If he's not able to do so, your parents should make no expectations of you being his caretaker at 15 years old. ######


Prompt:
My husband and I have a 5 month old daughter. He is only just getting comfortable enough to change her wee diapers without me supervising/helping now, and when he was changing her last night he saw she had pooped and called me in to change her because 'I've done it before but this one is bad'. It wasn't bad, two wipes and she was clean. Just smelled a bit worse than usual since she started teething.

Tonight he was holding her after work and she started to poop. As soon as she was done he handed her to me. I sighed and said "another shitty diaper to change" while walking to the change table. He snapped back with 'I don't say that every time I have to pay the rent, or bills'.

Granted, he does pay the rent. I pay half, if not all of the utility bills depending on my income (I'm mostly a stay at home mom, but also have a house cleaner gig once or twice a month).

It upsets me that he doesn't do what I see as his fair share of parenting. Yeah, changing diapers is gross. No one WANTS to do it. I should know, she has been pooping twice as much since she started teething. He doesn't see her much with him working 5 days a week, but surely it's not too much to ask that I don't have to change every poop she does?

When I tried to bring it up with him, he said I attacked him with my shitty diaper comment and again brought up how he pays the rent without complaining.

He wants another child. I don't want to have another if I am going to be stuck wiping another ass for however many years.

I feel it's assholeish to compare paying rent to providing basic care for your child, but am I wrong? AITA? ######

Response: NTA - If he wants another child he needs to commit taking care of the first one first. ######


Prompt:
So, me and my boyfriend have been dating for
about 5 1/2 months, and I quit martial arts
because I got bored around the time we started dating, but I want to get back into it after quarantine is over. Its been an ongoing issue with us for the last couple of months because its "dangerous" and I've gotten hurt a couple times before.

He says he feels like when I didn't do a sport like him it was a similarity between us and that similarity will go away if I start martial arts again.  But, my mom already signed up for my classes to start again after quarantine. To quit again would be a hassle to convince my mom, and I also love martial arts because it helps me release anger and makes me confident in myself.

I told him that it was unfair of him to ask that of me, because I've been doing martial arts for years. I also brought up to him that he's making me bend over backwards for him even though he always asks me not to do that for people. I gave him my reasons I wasn't going to quit, and then he went off about how he should leave since he's a "horrible boyfriend" and makes me not do the things I like.

Even though he has flaws, I know he isn't a horrible boyfriend. I tried to convince him that he isn't a horrible boyfriend and told him that I wouldn't still be fighting to be his girlfriend if he was horrible. I then just asked for us to make a decision about the break up once we both have a clear mind to think reasonably which I guess he complied with.

I don't know if i'm the asshole here or him. AiTA?

also sorry for the bad formatting, I have no clue how to format. ######

Response: NTA - if he starts being controlling about your sport choices after 5 months of relationship he might keep on that path which is a no go. Good that you stood on your grounds! ######


Prompt:
Throwaway account as my Family knows my Main.

My sister and I are around the same age. I (25F) and she (22) never really got along. From a young age it was clear that she was the favorite child. She got everything she asked for and more. I think it made her entitled and spoiled.

I am currently going to college, and live on my own in a small 2 room apartment. I won some money a while back and work besides studying, so I am pretty well of. I am not home most of time.

My sister and her kid still live with our parents. She doesn't go to work since she's a single mom. Now she decided she wants to go back to college ( which I genuinely support) in th ecity I live. It's a 5 hour drive from our parents hometown. She doesn't want to go to work, and does not want to hire a babysitter. The Father of the Child is still in the picture and offered to take my niece in. My sister refused and said she didn't want to be separated from her child.

Without ever asking me, my parents and sister decided that my sister and niece would move in with me, and I would cover all costs on my own. She is already enrolled in class. They also decided she and her kid would move into my bedroom and I would sleep on the couch. I was also supposed to watch my niece. I said no. My apartment is really small and even though I am well of, I can't comfortably support my sister and niece financially.

My parents, grandparents and other relatives all called me and screamed at me for not supporting my sister and niece. My sister is already enrolled in class. Cancelling would cost a lot of money. My parents want me to pay it, since I am the reason she can't attend classes. Since then, I muted my phone and cut off all contact from my Family. I talked with my Friends and they all called my the Asshole for not supporting my sister. Am I really TA? ######

Response: NTA - If everyone is calling and screaming at you, they could easily just chip in their money to support her themselves.  Not your responsibility.  Don't give her a key and the problem is solved... sorta. ######


Prompt:
I’m a 27 year old Asian guy. Half my friends are other Asian guys. My girlfriend is a 25 year old white girl.

Recently, due to intense work stress, I’ve decided to seek counseling. I believe it would help me handle the streets a lot.

I told my girlfriend this, and she was nice enough to find me a list of people she believed could help; however, I already had someone in mind (an Asian guy) recommended from a friend.

Many of the issues I’ve faced stem from being Asian. For example, I’ve faced racism as a child. More recently, I’ve been forced to eliminate White/Asian guys from an internship applicant pool due to not qualifying for diversity quotas (programs where only certain minorities and women can apply to) despite being extremely highly qualified, and people that have taken the effort to network with me while most of the diversity applicants haven’t (this isn’t to insulate that diversity candidates are necessarily less qualified, just that since the program is diversity focused, the non diversity kids that choose apply are typically high caliber non-diversity kids). There are also other Asian related issues I’d want to talk about but won’t here so as to not cause a shitstorm.

All this has led to a lot of stress from office politics that I just want to get off my chest. The problem has arisen in that when I told my girlfriend that, she said I was being racist and/or sexist for only wanting an Asian guy as a counselor. ######

Response:
 NTA - I’m white and my husband is Japanese. We were having some problems in our marriage and needed to find a counselor, and it was absolutely critical to him that that counselor be Japanese. He wanted someone who could understand his culture and frame of reference without having to explain too much. And I totally respected that, because I wanted him to feel as comfortable as possible through the process, otherwise what’s the point? For example, one little problem I brought up was how he never flirted with me anymore but I witnessed exchanges between him and female friends that came across as flirty. Our counselor pinpointed the problem exactly as cultural, meaning she knew that was a common behavior for married Japanese men (flirting with your own spouse is seen as awkward) but she explained to him that I, however, am not Japanese and he needed to be more affectionate towards me because I needed that. He really appreciated that she knew where he was coming from, even though ultimately she recommended him changing.

Anyway, your girlfriend needs to understand that having that deep commonality is really important for some people to be able to open up 100% in therapy/counseling. ######


Prompt:
I (18F) sometimes like to lounge around in my house with no bra on if I know I won't be going out anywhere for the day. I actually don't mind wearing bras because I'm small enough to where it doesn't really matter either way, but sometimes I just don't feel like putting one on.

My living room faces the street and has a giant window smack dab in the middle of it, and I was sitting on the couch watching TV. Standard faire. Obviously, you can see me from the window, but it's never been an issue until now.

My neighbor, a middle-aged woman who I've barely ever interacted with, knocks on my door, and when I answer it, she starts berating me that young children live in the neighborhood and that me not wearing a bra is perverted.

Apparently, she had been walking past my house and she saw me stand up to get a snack and noticed my boobs were "flying free" which makes no sense to me because I'm a B cup but okay.

I told her I'd do whatever I want in my own house but now I'm starting to feel like maybe that was wrong of me to do. I'm mostly weirded out that she was looking at me so hard that she noticed I'm not wearing a bra, lol. AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA - I’m sorry but this is SO FUNNY! SHES the perv here. You’re in your fkn home ffs xD Tell her to stop being a Nosey Nancy and enjoy her walks.

(I really thought this was gonna be a case of a gross male relative, thank god it wasn’t!) ######


Prompt:
I have a five year old daughter named Colette. Ever since she was born my mil called my daughter "letters" as a nickname (because Colette ends in lette i'm guessing). It's not the greatest nickname in the world but I let it go.

The other day, my daughter randomly said: Why does grandma call me "letters". My name is Colette.

I told her: It's her nickname for you.

Colette: that's weird

me:Do you not like being called "letters"

Colette: not really

me:it's ok to tell grandma that you want to be called Colette instead of letters.

Colette went to my MIL's house today. My husband dropped her off and picked her up so I didn't see my MIL at all that day.

That night I get a call from my MIL. She tells me that it was really rude for Colette to say she didn't like her nick name. And that I shouldn't have told her to say that. She said I was raising her to be bratty. She also said that Colette couldn't come over until she apologized and says that she likes being called letters.

That last part pissed me off. I told her "what the fuck? You're banning a 5 year old from your house for not liking a stupid nick name. Then I hung up on her.

Aita for using that kind of language with my mil. ######

Response: NTA - I’m honestly just sort of in disbelief your MIL could be old enough to be a grandma and act like that. ######


Prompt:
AITA for wanting to retake my wedding photos?

Last summer I got married. My cousin is a photographer who lives in a different part of the country and she flew in to take the photos for my big day. There was never any discussion of it costing money, that it would be a family thing. She even stayed at my house while she was here. Family came from all over the country as we are quite a large family and it is rare to see us all in one place. She got tons of photos and she gave us a few of the ones that were took. Everything seems normal, until months go by and she still hasn’t sent over the rest of the photos. I’ve messaged her numerous times for her to send the wedding photos to me. Sometimes she responds, other times she doesn’t and just likes the message. I’ve offered to pay her money for the photos which she has declined to accept. I’m not sure what the issue is on her part at this point. It’s been a year and I still only have the handful of photos she sent over the day of the wedding.

I am considering hiring a photographer and getting some wedding photos taken again so I can have some to frame in my house. My only issue is I only have so many photos taken with my family and I’m disappointed because they won’t be the same as the ones taken on the wedding day. It will be impossible to recreate the photos we took when we were getting ready and leading up the whole day. I’m going to now have to get photos retaken and then when I post them on social media which then she’ll know I got them retaken. I feel like these wedding photos have driven a wedge in our family. ######

Response: NTA - I'm half wondering if she maybe lost them somehow or the files got corrupted (both are unfortunately things that could happen). At this point I would try asking if something happened to the photos and say you would rather just know and proceed with the retakes then be kept in the dark. And if its not then say you need an explanation on why you still don't have them ######


Prompt:
So this happened a while back but a conversation with a teacher made me overthink it.

I coached gymnastics. My last name is my fathers, and I'm not in contact with him due to mental abuse. I don't like my last name. So let's same my name was Lexy Smith. I introduced myself to the kids as mrs. Lexy.

I did this in all my classes, also those where I was an assistant. One day after assisting a preteam class (ages 5 to 8), the main teacher and I were cleaning up and she told me she would prefer if I would go by mrs. Smith because the kids were now calling her by her first name too. I refused since hearing my last name reminds me of the past and while I'm coaching I want to have fun. I get these kids are little, but surely they can call us by the names we prefer? She said she was older so I should just do what she says.

This was just before summer break and this specific class didn't fit in my new school schedule but in my other classes I kept up mrs. Lexy and nobody ever had a problem with it again.

But AITA for using my first name when kids adress me? ######

Response: NTA - I'm a teacher myself and in my opinion it's your name and your authority and relationship with the kids.  You get to choose what you want them to call you.  Unless a school/gym has specifc policies about how they address you, who cares.  Even then a part of me feels like ultimately it's your choice. ######


Prompt:
My cousin's birthday is coming up and she had asked me about a week ago if I'd be willing to to draw her OC's (orginal characters) for her instead of getting her a present. I normally never agree to do free work for people, because it can very quickly snowball out of control if someone heard I was doing free work, but since she's my family and it's her birthday  I agreed to do it. However, once she sent me the details of what she wanted I very quickly backed out.

Without going into too much detail she wanted some NSFW (not safe for work) art of her OC's doing some very NSFW things to each other. I let her know that I don't do NSFW stuff, but would still be willing to draw her characters as long as we kept things PG-13. No judgement or anything like that, just letting her know that I wasn't comfortable with doing NSFW stuff. She didn't take it well and this led into several days worth of angry texts and phone calls between the two of us that eventually culminated in me telling her to find someone else to take the commission and her writing a melodramatic rant on her Facebook and Instagram about how I was slut shaming and kink shaming her.

AITA? ######

Response: NTA - I wouldn’t call up a wedding photographer and ask him to shoot my porn video. Context matters in art. And you get to pick what you draw. ######


Prompt:
I’m gonna be honest, I’m already pretty sure I’m nta, but I want a different view, my older brother is a very entitled 18 yr old, and a couple times he has barged into my room without knocking, it started a couple years ago when I just got my phone and would stay up too late on it, it would mess with his internet connection to play games so he would try to catch me on it by barging into my room, he didn’t get into trouble for it then bc technically I shouldn’t of been on my phone, but after all of that he would just bathe in to my room for whatever, I would get mad and tell our parents, they’d say if he did again they’d take away his Xbox, and then he’d stop, and then do it again like a month later. Apparently it’d be too long since the first time so they would just tell him not to do it again, there’s even been times where I just wouldn’t say anything to my parents trying to be reasonable, just for him to do it again. He’s gone into full blown arguments about why he shouldn’t have to knock in his house and I’m a brat, he’s totally untrustworthy and would get me in trouble for anything possible, I think it’s a perfectly reasonable expectation since I’m 15 F

TLDR: my older brother thinks he shouldn’t have to knock on my door, I strongly disagree
Aita ######

Response: NTA - i would just start sitting around naked oersonally but i am petty ######


Prompt: So I (15f) was playing the sims today when my younger brother (8m) came into the room. Since it’s pride month in a few days I was looking at the pride flags that they have in sims to find one for my sim. My brother starts asking what these flags are so I explain to him about lesbians, gays, bisexuals, transgenders and other sexualities and genders. I don’t go too deep into these things as he is young, but I feel like he deserves to understand a bit about these things. He starts naming characters in cartoons he watches that are LGBTQ and then sits talking about these things to me. Then my dad comes in and asks what we were talking about. I explain to him that I was talking to my brother about the LGBTQ community as he was asking what this flag was in a game I was playing. My dad then gets very mad and starts saying that he doesn’t want my brother knowing about these things. At this point I am confused as a few of his friends know about these things and I learnt about them from tv shows and books when I was 8. Later I tell my mom how I’m upset that I won’t be able to go to pride this year and my dad goes very quiet and decides to go outside to eat. After dinner he explains to me that these aren’t appropriate subjects at dinner and that if I mention them again he will take my phone away from me. AITA for explaining LGBTQ to my brother? ######

Response: NTA - I think your dad is confusing sexual orientation/gender identity with sexual activity. ######


Prompt:
So, I’m a bit lost. My family is angry at me and my friends are saying I was in the right.

Due to me being an idiot, I now have a second switch. I thought my first Nintendo switch was broken, but turns out the problem was with my tv. So both work fine. I figured I’d sell my first one and put the money towards paying off my credit card or getting a ps5.

My dad, upon hearing this, immediately suggested I give the switch to my brother. Give. For free. He can’t even afford a game for the console, let alone the console itself. Am I also meant to give up my games to him?

My brother made my teenage years hell. He stole from me, threatened me, he is the reason I moved out 5 years ago and never looked back. I admit, I’m bitter. So very bitter. So when my dad suggested I give him the switch, I laughed and hung up.

Now my family are angry I’m not willing to give up a perfectly functional Nintendo switch, that I’m not using, for free. Apparently i’m being selfish. Am I the asshole? I don’t owe him anything, but I’m really biased about this so I could be wrong. ######

Response: NTA - I think most people would’ve laughed too! Would definitely recommend paying off your debt first though, PS5 is still a good few months away ######


Prompt:
My dad owns a pizza place that was handed down to him from my grandfather.

I've been working at the pizza place my while life, even part time while I got a business degree.

I found out last early last year that my dad had willed the restaurant to my stepmom. His reasoning being she needs to be taken care of after he dies. And that it would go to me after she died.

I was pissed and "quit" the next day. My dad ended up hiring two people to make up the work I was doing.

Now this is the potential asshole part. A month after I quit, I found a great location where another pizza place had shut down. I bought it and had it up and running in two months. My restaurant is take out only, but my business is doing extremely well.

My dad reached out to me last September and said that his restaurant was losing business because of me and to please come back to the family business. He offered to buy my business so I would get something out of it.

I declined the offer. Now the craziness of 2020 happened and because my restaurant was already setup for takeout, I'm only seeing a 5-10% drop in revenue.

The family restaurant however, is going under.

Now there's a whole lot of arguing about me causing my dad's family to become financially ruined.

AITA? ######

Response: NTA - I saw in one of your comments that you don’t get along with your step mom and she has children of her own. Let’s be realistic, she would probably leave the business to them and not you. You needed to take control of your life and it’s good you have your own business now. Your fathers restaurant isn’t failing because of you, it’s because he can’t adapt. ######


Prompt:
My father left when I was very young and I was raised primarily by my mother, she died a few years ago and I've had no interest in ever getting in contact with my father. My GF has always wanted me to get in contact with him because she thinks she's some sort of therapist and all my "issues" come from a lack of a father figure.

Without checking with me she tracked him down, told him I want to get in contact and then gave him my number. He called me and I told him to piss off and blocked his number after he told me how he got his number.

We got into a massive argument where I said she had no right to meddle in my life, called her a cunt and hung up. I have no intention of speaking to her until we're allowed outside again and I'm considering just breaking up over this.

Her friend texted me to tell me how upset my GF is and that I'm a horrible person so doing this to her. ######

Response:
 NTA - I remember a similar post over a year ago where OP's fiance contacted and invited his estranged family to their wedding.  He had cut them off because they were abusive and she decided to bring them into their lives because she wanted to get to know them.   He cancelled the wedding and broke up with her immediately.

Edit: sorry guys I can't find the link.  I really wanted to read it again. ######


Prompt:
I genuinely have no idea what to do here and I feel like I’m in the right and don’t need to back down!!!

I have long, thick, frizzy, wavy hair. When I go to sleep at night I rub coconut oil in it and put it into a French braid. This way my hair is nice in the morning, and when we sleep, my hair does not get in my husband’s face.

When carrying groceries up the stairs to our apartment three weeks ago (we do not take the elevator because of COVID as it can get crowded), I fell. I broke my collar bone, which was very painful. Because of the break, I obviously cannot braid my hair.

My husband complains that my hair gets in his mouth & on his face when he sleeps. It also gets trapped under his head/arm and is painful for me when I try to move. I have asked my husband if he can braid my hair for me so we can both sleep easier. He refuses.

His reasons are:
1- he does not know how (I offered to show him or have him watch YT tutorials)
2- he says it is not manly
3- he says I am a grown woman and can do my own hair. If I am incapable of doing so I should cut it (I cannot go to a salon bc of COVID).

This turned into a huge fight, I told him it feels like he does not care about me. He says I am being dramatic. I told him until he agrees to braid my hair, I will sleep on the couch, which he says is being petty. I feel so angry and uncared for, but yes maybe I am being petty?

So Reddit. Am I the asshole?

TLDR: broke my collarbone and cannot reach up to braid my hair at night like I usually do. My hair gets in my husband’s face and bothers him. He refuses to braid my hair. ######

Response:
 NTA - I mean it's only for a few weeks anyway. Not manly? What sort of bullshit is that? You know what's not "manly"? Not stepping up to help your injured wife when she can't do something herself.

Edit: Thanks for the award! My first one. ######


Prompt: So she’s been learning to play video games, she’s not that bad but obviously is nowhere near as good as the maniacs who play online. So I said if she plays while my PSN is logged in I’d prefer if she plays offline or against the computer. And if she absolutely has to then please not on FIFA because I don’t want to get demoted. Idk if she watches porn on it or does whatever but that’s the only thing I care about and that’s my conditions if she plays on my console, is not to ruin my online profiles. She accepted these terms which I thought was fair. But I came home from work and nabbed her playing FIFA on my account. I had spent soooooooo much time getting to Division 1 and winning the title. Blood sweat and tears. And she got demoted all the way to division 4. For anyone who doesn’t know that means you’d have to lose at least 20ish games in a row, usually I just stop playing when I’ve lost 4 games in a row bc that mans I’m tilted You guys might think it’s ridiculous and I should get a life but I really care about that garbage game lol. But I told her that look I asked you to do only one thing and you still violated my trust so I said that for the time being I’m not at all comfortable with her playing on my console. She said she’s sorry (in fairness to her this is very mature) and I said I appreciate it for apologizing but I just need to regain trust in you before I want to let this be a thing again. I offered to contribute 75% of the costs of buying a console just for herself but she declined as she says she doesn’t see herself playing much and she wishes she could play on my console again. Just now I overheard her on the phone to her sister and she says that she thinks I’m being unnecessarily harsh and a tad bit controlling and I’m going overboard. I’m just not comfortable with it. AITA? ######

Response: NTA - I mean I don’t understand why you just didn’t... create an account for her in the first place... but anyway, you explained it to her and she said she understood and wouldn’t do it. Yet she still did it. You aren’t wrong here, even if it may seem childish to most people. ######


Prompt: So I have a large collection of books that I often reread. I love them all very much. My favourite series is noughts and crosses books. My parents often make me lend books to people I barely know and sometimes the people take ages to return it and if they do, its often a bit damaged. The other day my parents asked me to lend the noughts and crosses to someone (we’ll call this someone J). J is quite nice but she has a brother who likes to play football with almost any object in their house, and I was not going to let him do that to my book. I said No. My parents totally blew up at me. They said I was selfish. I told them I wasn’t going to lend my favourite book series to someone else because I love them and I don’t trust other people with them. My parents are now angry at me and I’m angry at them, but I’m starting to think that maybe I was being a bit selfish. So AITA? ######

Response: NTA - I love lending books to people but I also have some books I won't lend because I'm worried about not getting them back. They are your property, you don't have to lend them if you don't want to. ######


Prompt: This sounds like a dick move, but hear me out. My younger brother (12) has been playing Fortnite continuously every day for this entire “break”. He recently lost his Xbox power cord to our dad for not doing the dishes and other chores that were not completed, but he still has his phone. Because he isn’t downstairs playing Xbox, he is playing Fortnite videos on YouTube at stupid high volume level. He will sit in my room and watch them, and I’ve asked him multiple times to turn it down, as I’m also trying to play my Xbox with some friends, and need to be able to hear them. He largely ignores me and says “it’s not that loud”. For context, I’m also a weeb, and enjoy a variety of Sub and Dub anime. And I thought that if he won’t turn his volume down, I won’t either. He is not a fan of anime at all, and has asked me in the past to not watch it near him because he “thinks the voices are too high pitched and creepy.” So I thought when we eat lunch (my dad is working right now and we are home alone) I can turn my sub anime to the max, and make him understand that it’s rude to do things like this. ######

Response: NTA - I know you said your door doesn't have a lock but would your dad be opposed to using a door stop (a small wedge shaped piece of rubber or wood pushed tight under your door) to keep your brother out? It's your room and he has no business in there unless you invite him in. ######


Prompt:
When my wife was younger she lived off takeaways or she didn't eat, her dad would buy her 2litre bottles  of coke when she was 6+ so she never really had that healthy relationship with food, she also never got to leave the house unless it was for school.

She is obsessed with eating healthy and exercising, this became worse when we had children (13F,11F,4M)

The children love exercise and that's great, our eldest is in football and track and our other daughter is in gymnastics and ballet.

My wife loves making them eat healthy too, their breakfast this morning was a spinach and tuna wrap with a fruit salad on side

Their lunch is going to be Shaved Carrot and Radish Salad.

They're allowed one cheat snack a week but the rest of the time they're only allowed fruit or vegetables and that's great but they should be allowed stuff like biscuits in my opinion.

This is where the problem has started, I'm a little frustrated at the food because let them be kids and stop taking your own issues out on them,  then while they're playing video games in the study she comes in trying to get our eldest to come out and play football in the garden with her and the youngest.

Her; hey *eldest* come play football with me and your brother? Better than sitting around all day and not being productive!

Me; babe, kids are allowed to have some lazy days it's fine!

Her; no it isn't! They should be out exercising, getting fresh air, NOT getting eye strain on the console

(Their screen time used to be 2hrs a week on xbox)

I may have snapped and told her to leave the children alone.

She got all teary eyed and we haven't spoken since.

I thought I was in the right but after speaking to my sister she says I was the AH
AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA - I hate this mindset that you need to be productive at all hours. Even the world's geniuses had downtime. Schopenhauer used to go on walks with his poodle. People need relaxation and this capitalist bull of "always be working" can lead to so many complexes and contribute to mental illness. Sounds like your wife is on a good road to fuck your kids up in a different direction, you guys need to talk it out, maybe with the help of a therapist.

Edit to add: shaved carrots isn't lunch for growing kids. I say this as a salad loving vegan. They need more carbs. ######


Prompt: I just gave birth to my daughter.  Of course my MIL is crazy over the top, over the moon.  She wants to come over all the time to see the baby.  I’m ok with that.  I really am.  I can use some company and advise.  My only request is that she please call me first ahead of time.  Call me so I can change out of my sloppy baby puked on clothes or put the dogs in another room so they don’t overwhelm her or just for the simple fact that I am not a big fan of surprises.  Anyway instead of respecting my wishes she tells the entire family that I’m a snob who doesn’t want her to visit even though I explained she’s always welcome and I would never say no just please call me ahead of time.  Now I’m getting snarky remarks from family members.  Am I being unreasonable? ######

Response: NTA - I hate surprise visits! It never fails that there is some kind of mess or I look awful. Everything in the house will look perfect until that one surprise visit. ######


Prompt:
I'm sitting at my computer working when my wife asks me to come help her in the yard. No problem, my eyes could use a break anyway. I go and move the planter she needed moved and get back to work.

5 minutes later she asks me to move it back. Fine, whatever.

Every time I get back to my desk it's something new. The dog needs water and her hands are dirty, can you bring me my gloves, will you hang those curtain rods, the list goes on.

After about 45 minutes she notices my agitation.

Wife: Is everything ok? You seem irritated.

Me: I am irritated, because you're irritating me.

Wife: I don't deserve to be talked to like that.

Me: Well I don't deserve to be interrupted every 5 minutes while I'm trying to work. I've read the first paragraph of this management plan 6 times in the last 45 minutes because you constantly need something. You're an independent woman, figure it out.

Wife: You're an asshole.

So? Am I? ######

Response: NTA - I hate being interrupted while I'm trying to work. If I start a task and get distracted I have to start all over again. You're good! ######


Prompt:
I give my daughter a lot of compliments. Great writer, very funny, selfless, smart, great artist, etc. I'll also tell her she is beautiful every now and then. My daughter is 16.

She had recenly gotten some new clothes shipped to our house. She changed into her new clothes and I told her she looked beautiful. She thanked me and gave me a hug.

Later my wife berated me for calling her beautiful and noted she had heard me call her beautiful before. She says it will make her worry too much about her looks and her fashion. She said its sexist. She said this might reinforce her into thinking buying new clothes is how she will get compliments/be beautiful. We are still arguing about this. Am I the crazy one?? Am I the asshole?? ######

Response: NTA - I get what your wife was on about but as long as you also compliment her about other things that aren't appearance-related (which it sounds like  you do) there's nothing wrong with saying someone looks beautiful when they're showing off new clothes. ######


Prompt:
AITA?

So first some background... I’m a short woman (5’2” ish) and my husband is pretty tall (about 6’3”) so when we go out together he usually asks me to wear heels which I don’t really mind depending on where we are going/ what we are doing.

So anyway, one day we are going to the mall and it’s early fall so I put on my only pair of ankle boots with a heel and off we go. My husband and I are chatting in the car and everything is fine and then we reach the mall. My husband has parked the car and we get out and make our way inside the mall. We’re walking through the first store when I see my husband’s whole demeanour change and as I’m trying to talk to him he is obviously not in a good mood. So of course I ask him what’s wrong and he snaps at me that my boots are “making too much noise when I walk”. I kinda laugh this off and jokingly ask if he’d prefer me to walk around bare foot to which he says I should go back to the car and change into the Wellington boots that I keep in the trunk. He’s actually serious but the boots are filthy, caked in mud and it’s just not something I really want to do. So I explain that I wouldn’t be comfortable doing that and I don’t think it’s appropriate to wear dirty boots around the mall and he is really mad. He makes us leave before we’ve even done any of the shopping that we went there for and proceeds to use the entire journey home to make me feel terrible for not changing the boots. AITA for not just changing them? He won’t explain why it was such an issue but it obviously upset him so maybe I was in the wrong? ######

Response: NTA - I feel like this is too blatantly obvious that he's the asshole here to be real but meh, I'll give a judgement anyways. Your husband is insecure, rude, and controlling not to mention ridiculous. You should wear whatever the fuck you want to wear which you feel comfortable in. ######