Are there any other parents here who have struggled to get. So, you know, right? It's like herding kittens. My wife and I would start long before it was time to leave, but that obviously wasn't working because we were always. But one day was a complete Gong Show. Five minutes before we needed I found my oldest daughter. My middle daughter was playing the piano, and my youngest daughter. So I told them, "Stop reading, put on your socks." Five minutes later, nobody was in the car. On my way to help my youngest I noticed my oldest daughter. Now I'm starting to lose it. Her response? "I didn't hear you." But before I could say a word. And that's the story. The end. I just wanted my daughters for getting out the door on time. But then I remembered something. You can't inspire accountability in others until you model it yourself. That's when I realized I wasn't taking. I was blaming it totally on my daughters. So I tried a different approach. What was I doing, or not doing, that may be contributing to this problem? Then it hit me. I knew when they needed groomed and ready to leave. But did they? I also knew what time it was, but there were no clocks, which I discovered is like where time ceases to exist. Solution. I put big clocks everywhere and posted the schedule in a common area. And you know what? It actually worked. Now we're not perfect, but it's much better than it was. I had fallen into the same trap that many people in leadership, which is blaming other without considering my part in it. While working with leadership teams, I discovered three powerful habits. I call it the three habits. Habit one: Don't blame. Habit two: Look in the mirror. Habit three: Engineer the solution. This sequence of habits has an almost. And you get better results. But this isn't just for CEOs and managers. We're all trying to help. As a parent, a coworker or a volunteer. Here's why these habits work. Habit one: Don't blame. Think about the last time. How did it turn out? Probably not well. That's because our brains interpret blame the same way they interpret. Blame triggers, which effectively shuts down, which is the problem-solving. So when I was getting angry, it wasn't motivating them. It was actually impairing. Researcher Dr. Amy Edmondson to see how culture affects to report medical errors. She expected that the high-performing, but to her surprise, they reported more errors. Why? Because when people they're more willing to admit. But in cultures of blame, or point their finger at someone else. No one is going to take accountability if they think they're going to be. Blame destroys teamwork, problem solving, learning and initiative. In other words, blame. So what should we do instead? Habit two: Look in the mirror. Most of us are really good at noticing but we're not so good at noticing. One time, my assistant helped me mail out to prospective clients. Three weeks later, no responses. So I checked one of the cover letters. It read, "Dear Mr. Smith, [insert company name here.]" She missed one of the variable. Thousands of dollars down the drain. Now, she felt awful and said, I was thinking, "You are darn right." But then I looked in the mirror and I realized I didn't highlight like they are in all our other templates. If I had, she couldn't have missed it. Now I'm not saying. But if I look closely enough I can usually discover contributed to them in some way. This is a profound insight because if I can see my part in a problem, I can do something about it. The next time you encounter. Ask yourself: How may I. I taught these principles and followed up a few weeks later. A project manager told me, "Our general manager is a total blamer, and team meetings." But the week after you taught that meeting went very differently. When our general manager he was about to lay into the person. But then he stopped, put his head in his hand for a moment, then looked up and said, 'This is how I think.' The mood in that meeting. And then I saw something. Other people began, 'No, boss, it wasn't just your fault. This is how I think.' When leaders acknowledge it makes it safe for everybody. And if nobody else follows suit, then you've earned. "And how may you have contributed Before others will allow us they must first see us." Now what if the cause of your problem. Habit three: Engineer the solution. When bad things happen, our brains are hardwired to blame the person closest to the mess. Fortunately, there's a fix. It's called "systems thinking," which is noticing how environment. Systems thinking emerged toward when the US Air Force noticed that a lot of their planes were crashing. Their conclusion? "Our pilots are idiots." So they engaged some consultants to help them select. When the consultants investigated, they discovered they didn't have. They had a cockpit problem. For instance, pilots confused gear handles if they were located. Or they mixed up controls if they were in a different position. Design better cockpits, and you'll have fewer crashes. So the US Air Force by simplifying cockpit design. Similarly, when I stopped I noticed the environmental factors. I engineered the solution so they had the information. Instead of asking, "Whose fault is this?" Ask: "Where did the process break down?" This question is your secret weapon and find sustainable solutions. Remember, you can't inspire accountability in others until you model it yourself. The next time you encounter a problem, test this sequence of habits. Don't blame. Look in the mirror. Be the change that you want to see in others. Our world is in desperate who take ownership. In our workplaces, our homes and in our society. And the secret is, as you model these behaviors, so will those around you. It's kind of magic. Thank you.