In article <May.5.02.50.42.1993.28665@athos.rutgers.edu> Fil.Sapienza@med.umich.edu (Fil Sapienza) writes: >I am interested in finding out why people become >atheists after having believed in some god/God. >In conversing with them on other groups, I've >often sensed anger or hostility.   Though I don't >mean to imply that all atheists are angry or hostile, >it does seem to be one motivation for giving up >faith.  Thus, some atheism might result from  >broken-ness.  I'd like to field this one, if I may.  Although I am a believer in and follower of Christ, my experiences with religion haven't been all that positive.  In fact, there was one point in my life when, for about three days, I simply _couldn't_ believe in the existence of God.  Anyway, when I look back upon the troubles I've had, they seem to fall into two categories -- impulses to unbelief that resulted from logical contradictions, and impulses to unbelief that resulted from frustration with God.  The first category doesn't occur to me much anymore, as I have worked through most of the arguments for the non-existence of God.  But way back when, these would cause me some problems, and I would have to struggle with my faith to continue to believe.  I can see where others less stubborn than I (and I do mean stubborn.  Stubborness has often been the only thing standing between me an atheism from time to time) would fail.  The second category arises out of some long-term personal difficulties and the struggle to live my life as God would have me live it WITHOUT living my  life as others would tell me how God would have me live it.  A good example of this is my struggle with the more radical Christians I meet.  I am not, nor have I ever been, "on fire for Chirst," and I don't think I ever want to be. Nevertheless, I am not "lukewarm" about my faith, so I don't really fit in with the mainstream either.  Quite naturally, I feel a lot of anxiety about my dislocation within Christian society, and it can lead to a lot of internal tension, when I want to do what I _know_ is right, but when another part of me believes that what I want to do is wrong because all the other Christians think so to.  Quite naturally, this tension has a destructive effect on my relationship with God, and during all of this internal strife, there's atheism sitting there like the promised land -- no rules, no responsibilities, no need to live up to anyone's expectations but my own. Complete freedom.  Of course, it's all an illusion, but nevertheless, it's a very appealing illusion, especially when the so-called "people of God" are behaving like total twits.  I can easily understand why someone would go that route, and would be hostile to ever coming back.  IMHO, many of the former-Christians-turned-atheists-who-are-now-actively- hostile-to-Christianity are so because their experience with Christ and God wasn't a very peaceful one, but one of mind-control and "shut-up-and-do-what- you're-told-because-we-know-what's-best-for-you-because-it's-God's-will-and- you're-to-young-to-know-what-God's-will-is-yet" courtesy of some of Christ's more overzealous followers.    A final reason why people become atheists is because Christians do not have a very good reputation right now.  One of the things that attracted people to Christianity in the ancient days was the love that Christians obviously had for one another and the world around them.  Unlike the rest of the world, Christian communities actively cared for their poor, and the Christian rich did not trod on the backs of their poorer brothers, but bent down to help them.  Christians were known for living exemplary lives, even if they were thought to be traitors to the state because they wouldn't sacrifice to the emporer.  Nowadays, courtesy of the media and some Christian leaders who lost Christ on their way to power, people see Christians as sexually-repressed hippocritical busibodies who want to remake society into a facist version of  their own moral view.  There are a lot more reasons why people become atheists, but I don't have time to go into them right now.