when your spouse disappoints you
1 Approach your spouse to talk about your disappointment. 2  It is important to own your feelings and not blame your spouse for how you feel. 3  Communication is a must. 4  You cannot assume that your spouse is aware that you are disappointed or that he/she knows what your expectation was or is if you have not communicated it. If you need to write down what you are forgiving one another for and also dating it so that it is finished business, then do it. 2  Learn and grow from the experience so that you and your spouse will not keep doing the same thing over and over again which creates disappointment.