controlled or erased becomes a barrier that prevents people from improving the quality of their lives here and now Take for example planning a vacation You can choose to approach the planning with anxiety frustration or aggravation You might worry that you be able to do what you want to do on the trip that the flights will behorrendous and that all the planning is taking away time from other things you should be doing At times you may even tell yourself trip worth all this planning ugh I give By the time you take the trip you may be filled with such resentment or annoyance over the planning and packing that nothing about the trip will quite make you happy You return home dissatisfied and unfulfilled You vow to take another better more perfect trip in the future Alternatively you can accept the planning embrace it You have to do it anyway so you might as well enjoy it You can conjure a feeling of excitement and imagine your future pleasure as you think through what you want to do You can spend time looking at photos reading articles and creating an agenda When you hit setbacks you can