There is a mistake that is done by us healers, where umuntu needs to sort out who they are first, their identity before embarking on any rituals of ukuthwasa but uthole umuntu ethwasa ebiza idlozi lika stepfather esgodlweni. Its very confusing and misleading. There are things that you need to do yourself without paying a healer, qala with those small steps before ujahe ukuba ithwasa and have people bekudumisa as if uyiskhokho. Not all problems can be solved by the healer you need to take the lead wena and yena abe there to provide advise and direction. Recently I met two ladies emsamo from pinetown and another from umlazi who happens to work with my friends esasigruva nabo before the spirits took over (ngzonxoxela ngomgruvo). I liked the fact that these two ladies know their history, family issues, and they are very spiritually intune better than most people I have met. This helps you coz uma uhlolelwa then u know ukuthi umlaphi wakho ukhuluma ngani, you will know as well why esho kanje. That way even the solutions proposed will make more sense to you if wazi istori sakho unless kuvela into ejulile efihlekile emsamo.