My love you changed my life in 4 different times just like 4 seasons. In 2002 you changed my title to be a girlfriend, in 2003 to a mother, in 2007 to a wife , in 2016 to a widow! But sadly on the 5th I witnessed the most painful & brutal experience in my entire life! God decided to take you away from us,I can lie infront of the world and walk with bravery , smile with a bruised spirit, walk with silent screams, but the fact still stands i weep deeply almost every night and beg God to return you to me. I can't get used to your absence! Today feels like I'm loosing you over and over again! ....The pain of loosing you never goes away, the wound is always fresh. It is the grace of God that keeps me going each day. Being angry at God for not saving your life can not help me... God is God! He does as He pleases! I guess He designed our lives exactly like this, my job is to adjust to His plan. I will always love you myeni wami ??... Goodnight sthandwa sam, rest well ??.