The Profoundness of 8 October…. | Demoerin
The Profoundness of 8 October….
Sometimes I ponder for too long on a subject, so long that eventually when I put my thoughts to paper….it ends up in English.
On the 8 October I had the opportunity to attend the memorial service of my aunt who died on the 1 October. Called an opportunity because it was more of a great occasion, than a sad and mournful one.
Just the way my aunt intended it to be, she even chose the church as one where you could walk across the road to the pub. Sad, as the loss of a loved one will always be, especially when she was such a great lady, we found ourselves celebrating her life after the church service, in a pub overlooking the crashing waves of the KZN south-coast. The way she wanted it to be.
She made it so completely easy to do, seeing that she led such a great life. Great in the sense, that when it came to each attendee to say something we would have been able to continue for hours without end. I once again realised that this is the kind of send-off I would like, people sitting around and basking in the wonderful memories of a life shared with myself. Rather this than stand around in little mourning groups focusing on the there and now of the loss.
It was an extended eulogy, words coming as easy as the waves crashing the rocks on the shore. Completely dedicated in every endeavour, wheteher it was work, marriage, her kids or family. Complete selflessness, she loved completely and unconditionally and most important of all: I have never heard her utter an unkind word towards or about anybody. Everybody’s memories could be drawn back to one of these incredible personality traits, and the best part of it all was that it was not only nice words, it was the truth.
This off course further gave opportunity for introspection. Delving into my own life and realising that in many aspects I scored very low in comparison to the great example set by this lady. Fortunately, I still have the opportunity to better myself, in such a way that at my funeral-pub-party I will be remembered in truthfull memories and not pretentious niceties.
The other happening that made this day profound, is that after 3 years of the continuous re-opening of old wounds, Chritine’s murderers were eventually sentenced in court. I think the time has arrived to move on, and focus on being the best person I can be.
This post is not meant to invoke sadness or tears, It is a reminder that one day when your loved one’s are left with only memories of you, they should be profound. Great memories are schedule 6 medication when it comes to the curing of sadness.
15 Responses to “The Profoundness of 8 October….”
Oktober 13, 2008 at 10:11 vm
Demoerin , ja dis nice mense soos sy wat `n merk in die lewe laat, `n merk van hoop en om nie net die verkeerd in mense raak te sien ni, maar ook die goeie.
Maar ek dink sy sou nie goed gepraat het van Luke Watson nie.(lol)
`n Begrafnis is maar `n sad storie, maar ons het ook al na een van ooms se verassingsdiens gaan dop, hy wou dit so he en ons het.
Oktober 13, 2008 at 11:02 vm
Goeie inskrywing. Dit is een manier om te verseker dat die goed in mense “vir ewig” kan lewe – in ons gedagtes, herhinnering en erkenning van wat hulle vir ons beteken het. Ek is bly jy is veilig terug en hoop die skurke het ‘n vonnis ontvang wat pas by die misdaad. Ek vetrou ook almal sal dit in hulle harte vind om te kan aanbeweeg. Sterkte, maat!
Oktober 13, 2008 at 11:27 vm
Oktober 13, 2008 at 12:42 nm
😆 Brein, sy was actually ‘n HUGE sport fan (nog ‘n great ding omtrent haar lewe) en sy het absoluut niks van hom gehou nie!
Ja Emil, die vonnis ding is maar ‘n sad storie, juis vanweë die feit dat dit niks kan verander nie. Justice sou ek dit ook nou nie noem nie, maar hoe lank genoeg is is seker ‘n relatiewe begrip? 😉
Oktober 13, 2008 at 12:54 nm
Dis waar. Verwyte maak dit soveel moeiliker om te cope met die hartseer van die dood van ‘n geliefde. Sterkte. Al het ‘n mens ‘medisyne’, bly mens maar nog ‘n bietjie ‘siek’ vir ‘n rukkie.
Oktober 13, 2008 at 4:42 nm
Ek sal baie graag wil so onthou wil word soos wat julle hierdie besonderse mens onthou. ((DMI))
Oktober 13, 2008 at 7:47 nm
Sterkte, sterkte, sterkte…. Dit word beter…
Oktober 13, 2008 at 9:38 nm
Baie mooi inskrywing Dm! Sterkte.
Oktober 15, 2008 at 3:11 nm
Ek wou voorheen kommentaar lewer, ek neem aan jou tannie was van die Suidkus – mag ek dan vra, waar was hierdie diens gehou? Hier bly ongelooflike wonderlike en diep mense en jy is bevoorreg om dit te weet.
Oktober 16, 2008 at 6:51 vm
Hi Sammi, die diens was by St Winifreds Methodist in Athlone. Oorkant die straat is die Nautical Mile Pub. Pub wat die moeite werd is vir ondersteuning…JC Tequila kos net R10 ‘n shot 😆
Oktober 16, 2008 at 7:42 vm
Nou is ek heeltemal geografies verward. Waar is Athlone op die KZN suidkus? Is dit nie in Durban nie?
Oktober 16, 2008 at 7:47 vm
😆 Sammi, ek het geen idee waarom ek Athlone getik het nie…. dit is Warner Beach
Oktober 16, 2008 at 8:08 vm
😆 Te veel JC Tequilas, ne! Eendag moet jy tog verder suid as dit tent opslaan, dis nog mooier en miskien selfs goedkoper!
Oktober 16, 2008 at 9:35 vm
Sammi, wonderlike mense wat aan die kus bly. Ek was darem al so ver suid as San-Lameer….. en al gereeld in Margate en Uvongo.
A Different View of Reality » Kort gedagtes oor straf -
[…] Demoerin skryf in sy kommentaar: “Die vonnis is maar ‘n sad storie, juis vanweë die feit dat dit niks kan verander nie. Justice sou ek dit ook nie noem nie, maar hoe lank genoeg is seker ‘n relatiewe begrip.” Dit het my laat dink, so tussen die mal gejaag van my werk, en terwyl ek wag vir ‘n paar kollega’s om die dag mee af te sluit, sleutel ek maar die volgende op die Blackberry in. […]