SpEak You're bRanes

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{{cquote|If anyone needs me, I’ll be outside standing in the rain, scrubbing myself vigorously with a toilet brush and singing Land of Hope and Glory until my skin bleeds steak and kidney pudding and I end up the right shade of pasty-white bovine spongiform British to actually be able to participate in the discussion. Cheerio.|||<ref>Dizzy.  "[http://web.archive.org/web/20141121021910/http://ifyoulikeitsomuchwhydontyougolivethere.com/2011/11/28/we-call-it-the-shitter-over-here-thank-you/ We Call It The Shitter Over Here, Thank You]."  ''spEak You're bRanes''.  2011 November 28.</ref>}}

'''spEak You're bRanes''' ("A collection of ignorance, narcissism, stupidity, hypocrisy and bad grammar") was a blog dedicated to chronicling the dumbest and most reactionary of reader contributions to [[United Kingdom|British]] news websites — topics usually ranged from [[racism]] and [[nationalism]] to blind obsessions with the [[Capital punishment|death penalty]]. It started with a focus on the [[BBC]]'s ''Have Your Say'' comment sections but then expanded to include the comment sections other news websites, especially those of the ''[[Daily Mail]]''. Think of it as a British media equivalent of [[Fundies Say the Darndest Things]]. The page has since disappeared, but the archived version is thankfully preserved for those who want to while away a few entertaining hours.

Its last article was published on February 2012, and the site closed in November 2015.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20150615000000*/http://ifyoulikeitsomuchwhydontyougolivethere.com/</ref>

==Examples==
A typical example of an item picked up by spEak You're bRanes for attention and comment was provided by [[James Delingpole]]'s article in the ''Daily Mail'', humbly and innocuously entitled: "How the BBC fell for a Marxist plot to destroy civilisation from within".<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20140904225030/http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/article-2041518/JAMES-DELINGPOLE-How-BBC-fell-Marxist-plot-destroy-civilisation-within.html How the BBC fell for a Marxist plot to destroy civilisation from within] From the ''Daily Mail''</ref> The cause of civilisation being destroyed? Why, the BBC and academia sometimes using BCE and CE instead of BC and AD, of course! <ref group="note">Some will no doubt recall that the reason [[Conservapedia]] was founded was because it came to [[Andrew Schlafly]]'s attention that Wikipedia had adopted the same evil, puke-inducing convention (even though it actually allows both styles depending on context, as do the BBC and academia).</ref> Here are some views on the matter from the ''Mail'''s comments section that spEak You're bRanes highlighted for 
scholarly assessment
 deserved ridicule:<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20140419082514/http://ifyoulikeitsomuchwhydontyougolivethere.com/2011/10/17/bc-gone-mad/ further discussion] Further discussion of this item on spEak You're bRanes</ref>

{{Cquote|BRAVO! A great article, but is anyone listening? I feel that it’s a lot like Nazism which crept in to Germany insidiously over time. If we don’t wake up to this creeping threat, then 1984 will be here sooner than we realize.|20px|20px|David, Darlington, England}}

{{Cquote|All atheists are anarchists by nature; and all anarchists are parasites by design that enjoy feeding off the misery endured by the vulnerable. The vulnerable of course are all those Religious individuals who wouldn’t wish their worse fears on anybody else. All anarchists should be asked the simple question :- ” when did you decide to be born “.|20px|20px|Catch-42, Macclesfield, England}}

If you ever feel a little depressed with life and need a bit of a pick-me-up, just remember that you're not Catch-42 from Macclesfield, England and you should feel better in no time.

==External links==
* [http://web.archive.org/web/20150121193235/http://ifyoulikeitsomuchwhydontyougolivethere.com/ If you like it so much why don't you go live there?] (Wayback machine)

==Notes==
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==References==
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[[Category:Internet]]
[[Category:Media]]

Categories: Internet, Media