Chupacabra

{{Cryptid}}{{Page is goat}}
{{cquote|You know what '' really'' gets my goat...?}} 
The '''Chupacabra''' (Spanish for "goat sucker" &mdash; from ''chupar'', "to suck", and ''cabra'', "goat"<ref group=note>Though in proper Spanish, it would be ''chupacabras'' because compound words always end in -s.</ref>) is a [[cryptid]] inhabiting North America. It is said to subsist on [[goat]] (and is therefore the sworn enemy of [[RationalWiki]]). Reportedly, it slaughters them quite viciously, [[vampire|drinks their blood]], and apparently consumes their flesh, although that is open to debate. Often, it is said that bloodless goat carcasses are found in its wake. The name was first coined by Puerto Rican comedian and entrepreneur Silverio Pérez, after the first reports were released by the press in 1995.<ref>[http://paranormal.about.com/od/chupacabra/a/On-The-Trail-Of-The-Chupacabras.htmOn the trail of the Chupacabras] by Stephen Wagner (October 5, 2007) ''About Entertainment''.</ref>

==Description==
There are many descriptions of Chupacabra. Common to all is the presence of sharp teeth, dorsal spikes, and a taste for [[goat]]. Sometimes images show a [[reptile|reptilian]] creature, sometimes a [[bigfoot]]-type creature, sometimes a winged creature, sometimes a classic [[UFO]]-big-eye-[[anal sex|anal]]-probing monster, and most recently a hairless canine.

==Range==
The Chupacabra was first reported by Madelyne Tolentino in Puerto Rico in 1995,<ref>[http://paranormal.about.com/library/weekly/aa051898.htm On the Trail of the Chupacabras]</ref> although mass killings of farm/domestic animals had been reported on the island as early as 1975. (In 2010, skeptical reporter Benjamin Radford suggested that the description given by "Mad Tol" was similar to the alien Sil depicted in the movie ''Species'', which she had coincidentally, or not, watched just a few weeks previously.) Since then, reports of chupacabras have been made throughout the Spanish-speaking Americas &mdash; which according to [[Lou Dobbs]] includes the entire [[United States]] &mdash; and even as far as the [[Philippines]].

==Habitat==
[[Image:chupamapa.gif|right|thumb|150px|Primary range of Chupacabra, and source of Lou Dobb's ''tsouris'']]
The chupacabra prefers any area in which it can find [[goat]]s. Sightings are most common in rainforests and deserts. Given that goats can range widely, it is reasonable to assume that chupacabra can follow its prey.

==Sighting==
01 Sept 07: 
[http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,295481,00.html Texas Woman Claims to Have Found Mythical 'Chupacabra']

OK, it's [[Fox News]] but…

==Classification==
If classified as a [[cryptid]], then chupacabras may be unique, and therefore unclassifiable. If it is indeed some form of previously undescribed, but not supernatural, animal, it will be possible to classify once a specimen is obtained for study.

From a [[creationism]] standpoint, the chupacabra's [[baramin]] is unknown. Various cryptids are mentioned in the [[Bible]], so closer reading may yet reveal more information. For example, the Bible mentions "The Beast", the Leviathan, and many others not adequately explained by [[atheism|"scientists"]]. We can infer, however, that [[Noah]] must have taken at least two on board the Ark, and that they were securely housed away from the [[goat]]s.

Some say that the chupacabra is merely a [[coyote]] with severe {{wpl|mange||.}}

==Ways to kill a chupacabra==
[[File:James Randi and Chupacabra Trap.jpg|thumb|right|200px|[[James Randi]] setting a chupacabra trap with his own likeness]]
#Have your [[goat]] attack it.
#Shoot it with your [[Fun:Weapon of gun|weapon of gun]] (but remember, it is ''largely defensive'', so don't use it too often).
#Convince it to join RationalWiki. We don't believe they exist, so they will vanish in a puff of [[logic]]. 
#Set a [[Don't feed the Troll|troll]] against it.
#Send a [[Fun:Dalek|Dalek]] after it.
#Spear it with an [[Vampire#How to kill a vampire|oak stave]].
#Tell the Emperor [[Caligula]] that it called him a goat.

==Picture gallery==
<gallery>
Image:Chupacabras.JPG|Photo of chupacabra. Genitalia removed for safety.
Image:chupamex.jpg|Chupacabra trapped successfully, a victory for the [[Goat]]s!
Image:Goatslaughter.jpg|Cleaning up after chupacabra
File:Chupacabra.png|A [[dragon]] variant
</gallery>

==See also==
*[[Cattle mutilation]]

==Notes==
{{reflist|group=note}}

==References==
{{reflist}}

[[Category:Cryptozoology]]
[[Category:Folklore]]
[[Category:Paranormal]]

Categories: Cryptozoology, Folklore, Paranormal