Joseph (husband of Mary)

[[File:Artgate Fondazione Cariplo - (Scuola ligure - XVI-XVII), S. Giuseppe con Gesù Bambino.jpg|right|thumb|165px|Come on, boy, keep up! Jesus!]]
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'''Joseph,''' ([[Hebrew]]: יוֹסֵף, "Yosef") was the husband of [[Mary (Mother of Jesus)|Mary]] and the father of [[Jesus]]. Well, the  [[Cuckold|dude who raised him]], anyway.

==Biblical history==
Joseph is not mentioned in any of [[Paul of Tarsus|Paul]]'s letters, nor is he mentioned in the [[Gospel of Thomas]] or the [[Gospel of Mark]], the two oldest gospels, giving support to the idea that Joseph was a toss in,{{efn|For scholars who accept the theory that Jesus was a teacher who was only turned into the [[Messiah]] or even God long after his death, throwing in such otherwise irrelevant claims adds to their theories.  See Crossan and Funk{{who}}, both of whom have written at length on this issue.}} likely to add some kind of family name to Jesus and more importantly, to provide the all necessary link to [[King David]] (Despite Jesus' having been born by a virgin birth and therefore not related to David through Joseph).{{efn|It is stated in the ''Siddur'', and is "commonly known" in Jewish tradition that the Messiah must come from David's line to restore the Kingdom."}} Of course, like many things found in the Bible, the two lineages for Joseph himself disagree — not about some ancient ancestor 400 years ago, but they disagree about Joseph's own father. [[Matthew]] names Joseph's father as Ben Yakob and [[Luke]] claims Joseph is the son of Hile. Those who believe in an infallible Bible have two explanations for why there are "supposedly" these two "differences" in a Bible with no contradictions or errors: 1) that the real father was Yakob-Heil, and used his middle name (something that isn't done in 1<sup>st</sup> century [[CE]] [[Judaism]] if at all), or 2) that Heil is actually the mother of Mary, not Joseph.{{efn|{{bible|Luke|3|23}} "Now Jesus himself was about thirty years old when he began his ministry. He was the son, so it was thought, of Joseph, the son of Heli, 24 the son of Matthat, the son of Levi, the son of Melki…" — sure, Heli is listed because he's Mary's father, even though the name follows just after Joseph. Um hum…}}

Just as there is no [[archaeological]] evidence for Jesus, there is also no actual evidence for a carpenter named Joseph living in or around either [[Bethlehem]] or Nazareth, married to a Mary with a child named Jesus.

==His life with Mary==
If you buy into the [[Catholic]] tradition, Joseph would have been a very sexually frustrated man since the Virgin Mary not only gave birth to [[God|someone else]]'s son, she remained a virgin all her life.{{efn|This is the official Catholic, [[Eastern Orthodox Church|Russian and Greek Orthodox]], and [[Lutheran]] doctrine.}} Catholics as such also manage to ignore references from the [[New Testament]] and non-canonical scriptures to the brothers and sisters of Jesus.

Unfortunately for this particular [[urban legend]], Judaism does not condone life-long [[celibacy]], for the [[sex]] act is discussed in the [[Torah]] as part of a healthy (and procreative) marriage.  A good Jew should try to have as many children as possible to fulfill the commandment to ''be fruitful and multiply'' but must avoid sex while his wife is pregnant.  {{bible|Matthew|1|25}} suggests that the couple had a normal married relationship after the birth of Jesus. 

The last time Joseph is mentioned in scripture is during the return trip from [[Jerusalem]], when he and Mary lose the 12-year-old Jesus and later find him in a temple in the midst of the teachers. He was absent at the wedding of Cana, and during Jesus' [[crucifixion]], Jesus made arrangements for his mother to be cared for by the Apostle John, not her husband Joseph. As a result of this, some assume that if Joseph really did live, he more than likely died before Jesus began his earthly ministry.<ref>[http://www.gotquestions.org/Joseph-Jesus.html Where Was Joseph when Jesus was an adult?] Got Questions</ref>

As with most of the mythology surrounding Jesus (outside of his being a teacher, [[prophet]] and/or [[mystic]]), the story of Joseph as well as Mary and the [[virgin birth]] are likely made up.

==Sainthood==
Joseph is the patron [[saint]] of [[Vietnam]] and [[Communism|anticommunists]]. For those who don't get the joke, [[Vietnam War|Vietnam is an officially]] communist state and the majority of its population are [[Buddhism|Buddhists]].

One memorable Catholic tradition suggests that burying a statue of Joseph in your yard (sometimes upside-down) will help you sell your house, presumably because he wants to get out of there.
==See also==
Three other men called "Joseph" are relevant to [[Abrahamic religion]]s:
*[[Joseph (Old Testament)]], who had family problems and a dream coat.
*[[Joseph of Arimathea]], who offered up his own tomb in one of the 4 versions of The Burial.
*[[Josephus]], a Romanised Jewish historian misquoted by Christians.

==Notes==
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==References==
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[[Category:Biblical figures]]
[[Category:Christmas]]
[[Category:New Testament]]
[[Category:Saints]]

Categories: Biblical figures, Christmas, New Testament, Saints