History Channel

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[[File:200px-History Logo.svg.png|thumb|right|165px|You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.]]{{media}}
{{cquote|I have a great new tagline for all History Channel shows: "This didn’t happen."|||Steven Toulouse<ref>[https://xcancel.com/Stepto/status/416385056576253954 Tweet by @Stepto/Stephen Toulouse] (December 26, 2013)</ref>}}
The '''History Channel''', also known as '''HISTORY''' and '''History.com''', is a [[US]]-based cable television channel. While it — occasionally — airs a few serious shows that might teach you something, it also airs some really strange shows that are notorious promoters of [[woo]], sometimes branching out into thinly veiled [[pseudohistory]] (and by ''thinly'', folks, we mean "lighter and more transparent than {{wpl|aerogel}}"). Its newest editions have stretched this even further into outright [[religious]] [[propaganda]]. In addition to the pseudohistorical documentaries, it also airs pseudohistorical drama shows and non-historical reality shows. The [[UK]] version of the channel, [[irony|ironically]] titled ''History'', strips out most of the [[gun nut|gun-nut]] yee-haw type "documentaries", and replaces them with quaint {{wpl|David Starkey}}-type stuff layered in between a perpetual obsession with [[World War 2]] and [[Hitler]].<ref group=note>Considering they constantly have to keep coming up with new, epic content about World War 2 ''ad absurdum'' — a war which ''concluded'' some 70 years ago! — it's perhaps no wonder they soon began straying more and more into highlighting various "[[Pseudohistory|hypothetical, rumored and/or generally far-out scenarios]]", let's (charitably) call it.</ref>

Sometimes called the "''Pseudo''history" Channel by [[Reality-based_community|people disappointed with its scholarly standards]] — at its ''very worst'', barely beat out by ''[[InfoWars]]'' in terms of misinformative content.<ref group=note>...Is such a thing ''even possible?'' [[Ancient_Aliens|Yes, it is]]!</ref> Equally well-deserved alternate names include the "[[Hysteria]] Channel", as coined by viewers pissed off by the parade of scaremongering [[Apocalypse|end-of-the-world]] shows (catering primarily to the [[Survivalism|doomsday prepper]] crowd). Last but not least, the "[[Hitler]] Channel" was coined by those fed up with the 
''[[Groundhog Day]]''-level of repetition
 extensive coverage of the [[Second World War]] — though they probably regret saying that now, since ''that'' stuff at least ''had a basis'' in actual [[history]].

==All Hitler, all the time==
{{cquote|Aah... The Luftwaffe. The {{wpl|Washington Generals}} of the History Channel.|||Homer Simpson, ''Lisa the Tree Hugger''<ref>[http://simpsons.wikia.com/wiki/Lisa_the_Tree_Hugger/Quotes Lisa the Tree Hugger/Quotes], ''Simpsons Wiki''. Accessed June 11, 2023</ref>}}
The channel had earned the unfortunate nickname of the Hitler Channel, due to its need to fill the schedule with content related to World War II.<ref>[http://www.salon.com/1997/05/08/media_90/ Media Circus: All Hitler all the time] by Mark Schone (May 8, 1997) ''Salon''</ref> As a result of this, viewers were essentially led to believe that nothing of note happened in recorded history outside of World War II and Ancient [[Egypt]]. And this was all during the HC's ''better'' days. The History Channel's loosening grip on history is a bit like watching someone you care for slip into dementia and start reliving their days fighting in the war but now with pyramid building aliens thrown into their waking PTSD nightmare. Seriously, don't leave this crap on at an assisted living facility or a mental health ward unless you enjoy misleading others with mixed messages.

Military programming has since moved to its sister channel, the Military History Channel, leaving the channel to fill their programming gaps with reality shows about old stuff like ''Pawn Stars'' and ''American Pickers'', utterly non-historical dumb content such as ''Ice Road Truckers'', ''Swamp People'', ''Ax Men'', ''Appalachian Outlaws'', ''Life After People'', and the topic of the next section...

==Pseudocrap and sensationalism==
{{cquote|At the end of the day we’re not an education resource. We’re an entertainment brand.|||A+E Networks CEO Nancy Dubuc<ref>[https://archive.ph/g8dnv A+E Networks CEO Nancy Dubuc, the Duck Whisperer] by Felix Gillette (June 20, 2013) ''Businessweek''</ref>}}

===''Ancient Aliens''===
{{main|Ancient Aliens}}
One of their classic intellectual achievements is their incredibly embarrassing series, ''Ancient Aliens''.<ref group="note">Yes, this is really on the "History" Channel. [http://www.history.com/shows/ancient-aliens Warning: you will laugh hysterically.]</ref> Sadly, it namechecks ''huge'' numbers of our articles (so rapidly as to be difficult to keep up with), such as:
{{collist|3|
*[[2012 apocalypse]]
*[[Ancient astronauts]]
*[[Area 51]]
*[[Astrology]]
*[[Atlantis]]
*[[Baghdad battery]]
*[[Bermuda Triangle]]
*[[Conspiracy theory]]
*[[Creationism]]
*[[Crop circles]]
*[[Cryptid]]s
*[[Crystal skull]]
*[[Curse]]s
*[[David Hatcher Childress]]
*[[Da Vinci Code]]
*[[Dendera lamp]]
*[[Erich von Däniken]]
*[[Fermi paradox]]
*[[Giorgio Tsoukalos]]
*[[Ghost]]s
*[[Mike Bara]]
*[[Moon landing hoax]]
*[[Mythology]] ( [[Greco-Roman mythology]], [[Norse mythology]], [[Egyptian mythology]], etc.)
*[[Native American#Woo|Native American woo]]
*[[Nazi]] myths ([[Nazi UFOs|Nazis and aliens]], [[Nazis]] and the [[Occult]] ([[Nazi occultism]]), [[Hitler#Other myths|Hitler lives]], etc.)
*[[Noah's Ark]]
*[[Nostradamus]]
*[[Oak Island Money Pit]]
*[[Organized crime]]
*[[Pangea]] ([[Saturnism]] and [[Plate_tectonics#Peleg|Peleg]] nonsense, not the reality)
*[[Multiverse|Parallel universe]]s
*[[Psychic]]s
*[[Pyramid]]s (Pyramid woo)
*[[Roswell]]
*[[Secret society|Secret Societies]]
*[[The Bible]]<ref group=note>No joke, they actually peddle this stuff as "history" now! But really, are you really surprised at this point?</ref>
*[[Time travel]]
*[[Urban myth]]s
*[[Vampire]]s
*[[Werewolf|Werewolves]]
*[[Witchcraft]]
*[[Faster-than-light travel|Wormhole]]s
*[[Zombie]]s
}}

To quote a typical talking head featured on the show, discussing (of all things) the 2012 apocalypse, "you would think [[Aliensdidit|that had to come from extraterrestrials]]" (sure, but only for very small values of "think").

Every segment has the announcer saying things like "could it be that… this is evidence of ancient aliens… maybe!" [[Penultimate paragraph syndrome|Near the end of one show]], at least, [[Michael Shermer]] gets a few moments to call it all rubbish. Otherwise, it is so much non-stop woo, it sounds like a train whistle! So much [[bullshit]], even the farmers are complaining!

At least ''[[Ghost Hunters|Ghostfinders]]'' is on the [[Sci fi|Syfy]] channel, where it (sort of) belongs.

===Parallel universes===
An episode of the channel's show ''The Universe'' called "Parallel Universes" went so far as to promote parallel universes as being solid [[scientific]] fact. At least ''The Universe'' is educational.

===''The Bible''===
Continuing its recent history of producing programs promoting [[historical revisionism]] and mystic pseudohistory, the History Channel has decided to feature a 10-part series called ''The Bible'', covering (watered down, family friendly) events from (wait for it!) the Bible. The series was created by Roma Downey, an actress who played a role in ''Touched by an Angel'', and her husband, "reality" television producer Mark Burnett. The series was launched on March 3rd, 2013 and concluded on March 31st, 2013 (which, by no coincidence, was [[Easter]] Sunday). On March 17th, 2013, the series met with a bit of controversy when [[Glenn Beck]] (of all people) tweeted:
 
{{cquote|Anyone else think the [[Satan|Devil]] in #TheBible Sunday on History Channel looks exactly like that Guy.}} 

Of course, "that Guy" referred to President [[Barack Obama]]. This caused a firestorm on the net. However, Roma Downey and Mark Burnett responded to the criticism by stating: 

{{cquote|This is utter nonsense. The actor who played Satan, Mehdi Ouzaani, is a highly acclaimed Moroccan actor. He has previously played parts in several Biblical epics&mdash;including satanic characters long before Barack Obama was elected as our president.|||}} 
Executive producer Roma Downey added, "Both Mark and I have nothing but respect and love our president, who is a fellow [[Christianity|Christian]]. False statements such as these are just designed as a foolish distraction to try and discredit the beauty of the story of The Bible."<ref>[https://archive.ph/w5uJ3 'Bible' producers: Obama-Satan resemblance 'nonsense,' actor Mehdi Ouzaani highly acclaimed] by Verne Gay (March 18, 2013) ''Newsday''</ref>

Obama later tore the History Channel and [[Fox News|Beck's friends]] a new one at the 2013 White House Correspondents' Dinner.<ref>[http://youtu.be/ON2XWvyePH8?t=7m29s President Obama at 2013 White House Correspondents' Dinner (C-SPAN)] by C-SPAN (April 28, 2013) ''YouTube''</ref>

==Actual fiction==
Around the same time as the aforementioned Bible series, the History Channel took aim at the ''Game of Thrones'' crowd by airing its first scripted drama, ''Vikings'', based on the semi-historical [[Viking]] raider {{wpl|Ragnar Lothbrok||.}} This might actually be a good sign, although historical accuracy is pretty much a lost cause when your source material involves a [[cow]] with madness-inducing moos and your only ''other'' source is two lines in the ''Anglo-Saxon Chronicle''. The show was well-received and concluded in 2020 after 6 seasons.

==Worth watching?==
Perhaps at one time yes, the "History" Channel might have had some intellectual merit. However, these days it has quite clearly fallen into a [[New Age]] nonsense trap, its shows having long been replaced with the above nonsense and generally boring and/or ''non''-history related content, effectively selling its [[education]]al value for short-term ratings and sensationalism. This seems to be a general theme among similar channels ([[TLC]], the Discovery Channel, [[Nat Geo]], etc.) these days. Never before has there been a more powerful argument for American [[PBS|public]] [[NPR|broadcasting]]. To be fair, much of the older educational programs still receive reruns and appear on On Demand. But as for newer content, the only thing played that is new content is much of the above horror.

At least Animal Planet continues to have a shred of dignity: it still airs [[animal]]-related content, at least for the time being, although a good chunk of it is soft core vore. Not to worry though, they have pretty much pushed even that aside for barely/non-animal related content as well. (We might view the 2012 mockumentary ''[[Mermaids: The Body Found]]'' as a [[Satire|satirical]] quip at the rampant [[pseudoscience]] in the sister channels or as a mockery of the audience's [[Sucker|gullibility]] in an elaborate echo of [[H. L. Mencken]]'s ''The Rise of the Bathtub'', but it also might be a sign that ''reality'' has simply lost its appeal among the viewing public.)

Currently there are only a couple shows (that is, shows still making new episodes) airing that have anything to do with history: ''Pawn Stars'', ''Modern Marvels'', and ''American Pickers''. ''Pawn Stars'' and ''American Pickers'' both involve finding or being brought items that loosely have historical significance. ''Modern Marvels'' is the last thread of purely educational content the entire channel offers, spending each episode on a specific topic and teaching you about how it's made, its history, and what it does. Episodes vary from airplanes to packaging.

But don't be discouraged, at least its yet another sister channel H2 seems to have ACTUAL programmes about history.
<ref group=note>Not anymore, sadly. It's ''Viceland'' now and most of its shows are about [[marijuana]].</ref>

==See also==
*''[[America Unearthed]]''
*[[Discovery Channel]]
*[[Drake Equation]]
*[[Nostradamus]]
*[[The Real History Channel]] — run by an actual Nazi
*[[Giorgio A. Tsoukalos]]

==External links==
*[http://www.history.com/ Their website]
*[https://m.youtube.com/c/HISTORY Youtube channel], why do they have over 11 million subscribers?!
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=utDHcbiOfKY History Lesson for the History Channel] (video)
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_3GUVZFvNAg What Ruined the History Channel? | Casual Historian] (video)
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vc3vt1Gqrn4 The Decline of the History Channel] (video) - Also pins the History Channel's decline in quality on reality TV but argues the History Channel has always had a surface level understanding of history, which just got worse over time.
*[http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2012/03/brief-history-of-chuck-grassleys-history-with-the-history-channel.html The horror experienced is bi-partisan.]

==Notes==
{{reflist|group=note}}

==References==
{{reflist|2}}
[[Category:Conspiracy theorists]]
[[Category:Misnomers]]
[[Category:Pseudohistory]]
[[Category:Television]]
[[Category:Ufology]]
[[Category:YouTube]]

Categories: Conspiracy theorists, Misnomers, Pseudohistory, Television, Ufology, YouTube