Jesus

{{silver}}[[File:Buddy christ.jpg|thumb|165px|"[[Yaweh|My dad]] taught me that [[Ten_commandments|life is a popularity contest]] — love me or burn, kiddo!"]]{{christianity}}{{confused|the fictional hero-figure, [[Jesús Malverde]]}}
{{cquote|For [[YHWH|God]] so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him [[Credulity|will believeth in anything]].|||''[[Christopher Hitchens|Hitchens 3:16]]''<ref>[https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/383961-for-god-so-loved-the-world-that-he-gave-his Christopher Hitchens > Quotes > Quotable Quote] ''Good Reads''.</ref>}}
'''Jesus''' (Judeo-Aramaic: ''Yeshu(a) bar Yehosef'', Greek, {{hint|romanized|rom.}}: ''Iesous uiou tou Ioseph'' — Jesus son of Joseph, Arabic: ''ʿĪsā ibn Maryām'' — Jesus son of Mary), otherwise known as Jesus Christ ("Jesus the Anointed"), is the central figure of [[Christianity]] (in case the name didn't give it away), and also a [[prophet]] in [[Islam]]. "Jezus" is made the king of [[Poland]].<ref>[https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/7bmwgq/jesus-christ-king-of-poland-876 Jesus Christ Is Now Officially the King of Poland: Some photos from Christ's coronation, which took place in Krakow last weekend.] by Paweł Mączewski (Nov 24 2016, 9:00am) ''Vice''. No kidding!</ref>

In Christian [[theology]], Jesus is the son of [[YHWH|God]], [[Virgin birth|born to the]] [[Mary (Mother of Jesus)|Virgin Mary]] (just take her word for it). His function in the divine plan was that of the [[scapegoat]], the [[human sacrifice]] which allegedly atoned for the very same [[fall of man]] which [[Problem of evil|his father had planned all along]]. Once that necessary step of the scheme had been completed, Jesus became the original [[ghost]] (or at least spirit) in [[Easter|the process]], after which he conjured up a ghost army ({{bible|Matthew|27|52}}). 

The [[Quran]] views Jesus as a [[Muslim]], the prophesied Messiah, and the predecessor of [[Muhammad]].<ref>''t of Jesus Christ in Islam'', 2nd edition, page 48, Oddbjørn Leirvik, 2010.</ref> 

==Jesus' life==
===Birth===
{{main|1=Virgin birth|3=Nativity}}
The [[Bible]] gives two distinct [[Genealogy of Jesus|lineages for Jesus]] (the "begats"), both an [[weasel word|attempt to fulfill]] the [[prophecy]] that the Messiah would be of [[King David]]'s lineage. The first lineage claims that he was the direct male line descendant of David through [[Saint Joseph|Joseph]], which made sense given Paul's statement in {{bible|Romans|1|1|3}} that Jesus came "from the seed of David, according to the flesh" (the belief at the time was that women were the earth into which men planted their seed so here Paul expressly states that Jesus's link to David is through the ''male'' line: i.e. through Joseph) and in {{bible|Galatians|4|4}} stated "God sent his Son, born of a woman" using the word ''gune'' (woman) rather than ''parthenos'' (virgin).<ref>[http://web.archive.org/web/20100804025708/http://www.jesuspolice.com/common_error.php?id=7 Mary Was a Virgin] ''The Jesus Police'' (archived from August 4, 2010).</ref>  The second account traces the lineage through Mary's father, actually tracing Jesus to "Adam and Eve" ({{bible|Luke|3}}). However, lineage was not transmitted through women back then, so double fail.

However, due to passages in Matthew and those in Luke (which might have been added later) that dominate early Christian [[mythology]],<ref group=note>In sociology, a myth is something that a group of people believes without evidence—not necessarily a false belief.</ref> Jesus is said, contrary to the explicit biblical texts, to have been born to a [[virgin]] mother, impregnated by the [[Holy Spirit]] without any of that nasty [[sex]] stuff having to be involved which is the so-called virgin birth or virginal conception held by most Christian religious groups<ref group="note">We are not sure why the Holy Spirit refuses to do this more often to completely 
forbid
 eliminate the need for sex altogether.</ref> In the [[Gospel]]s of [[Matthew]] and [[Luke]] (written many decades after his purported [[crucifixion]]), Jesus was born in [[Bethlehem]] (Judea) to Mary, who at the time was a virgin;<ref group=note>The word "virgin" might or might not have had anything to do with her sexual status, but rather her marital status.</ref> the pregnancy was initiated by the Holy Spirit. The Gospel of Luke relates that the [[angel]] [[Gabriel]] visited Mary in order to announce to her that she had been chosen to bear the Son of God ({{bible|Luke|1|26}}–38). More likely, his father might have been Joseph. Alternatively according to some poorly supported accounts from the 2nd century [[CE]] his father might have been a depraved, lecherous Roman soldier called [[Pantera]], or his father might have been some other human male who managed to find [[sexual intercourse|happy time]] with Mary. If Joseph were not his real father, Jesus would not be from the seed of David, thus disqualifying to be the Messiah; he would be just a 'christ' for the Christian religion.

The story goes that [[Augustus Caesar|Caesar Augustus]] ordered a survey (for [[tax]]ation) of the [[Roman Empire]] forcing Mary and Joseph to go to the home of Joseph's forebears—to the house of King David, although there are no records of such a survey taking place.  The story of the travel to Bethlehem by Mary and Joseph to take part in a survey is almost certainly fictitious. Mary and Joseph would not have to take part in a survey of the Roman Empire, as they lived in a client kingdom and not a province, and a census asking people to travel from where they live to their hometown would be effectively worthless for taxation purposes. The reason for this particular fabrication is that [[Hebrew]] prophesy foretold that the Messiah would be born in Bethlehem.

According to children's Christmas songs the world over, for Jesus' birth, they were forced to use a manger for a crib because the town's inn was full. According to {{bible|Luke|2|8|20}}, an angel spread word of Jesus' birth to several shepherds who came to visit the newborn. Matthew, on the other hand, tells of the [[Magi]], who brought many gifts to the infant Jesus (among which were [[gold]], frankincense and myrrh<ref group=note>This has led to an assumption that three Magi were present, whereas the actual number was not given in the text</ref> after following a [[Star#Religion|star]] which they believed was an indication that a King of the [[Jews]] had been born).   

Jesus was probably born in the [[Evidence_for_the_historical_existence_of_Jesus_Christ#Nazareth| town of Nazareth]], in Galilee. However, this has been disputed by claims that there was no settlement at that location at that time, and some claims that the title 'Nazarene' is a mistranslation of Nazarite (meaning a Jewish holy man who sacrifices a lamb and does not cut his hair).  
Jesus' early home is stated to have been Nazareth, and except for an escape to [[Ancient Egypt|Egypt]] in early childhood, to avoid Herod's massacre of the other male infants (another event that history does not record), all other events in the Gospels take place in ancient [[Israel]].  
Luke's Finding in the Temple ({{bible|Luke|2|41|52}}, where Jesus impressed the [[priest]]s by discoursing in scripture with them (and disses his relatives waiting for him outside), is the only detailed event between Jesus' infancy and adult life mentioned in any of the canonical Gospels.

===Ministry===
The Gospel of [[Gospel of Mark|Mark]] begins with the [[baptism]] of Jesus by John the Baptist, which appears to be the beginning of Jesus' public ministry.  Jesus came to the River Jordan, where John was [[preacher|preaching]] and [[baptism|baptizing]] people in the crowd. After John baptized Jesus and Jesus rose up out of the water, Mark states Jesus "saw the heavens torn apart and the Holy Spirit descending like a [[Dodo|dove]] on him. And a voice came from  heaven, 'You are my Son, the Beloved; with you I am well pleased'" ({{bible|Mark|1|10|11}}). Luke adds the chronological anchor that John the Baptist began preaching in the fifteenth year of [[Roman emperor#Tiberius (14-37 CE)|Tiberius Caesar]], approximately in 28 CE ({{bible|Luke|3|1}}) and that Jesus was thirty years old when he was baptized ({{bible|Luke|3|23}}). 

After this baptism, according to Matthew, God brought Jesus into the desert where he fasted for forty days and nights. During this period, [[Satan]] appeared before Jesus and tried three times to tempt Jesus into demonstrating his [[supernatural]] powers as a proof of his divine status; Jesus refused each temptation with a scriptural quote from the [[Book of Deuteronomy]].
[[Image:Angry Jesus.jpg|thumb|right|"Oh yeah? Well change ''this!''"<br/>
Jesus with the money-changers in the temple. That funny hat on his head is the way [[Medieval]] [[art]]ists drew a halo.]]

Jesus then began to preach. The Gospel of [[John]] describes three different passover feasts that Jesus attended, thus implying that his ministry lasted three years. 

The larger part of this was directed towards his closest followers, the [[Apostle]]s. At the highest point of his ministry, Jesus attracted disciples and audiences numbering in the thousands, in particular in the area of Galilee. Many of Jesus' most well-known teachings were given in the Sermon on the Mount, such as the Beatitudes and the {{wpl|Lord's Prayer||.}} Jesus often used parables in his [[rhetoric]]al technique rather than clear, unambiguous speech (which would have been much more helpful to mankind), such as the Parable of the [[Good Samaritan]] and the Parable of the [[Sheep]] and the [[Goat]]s; these teachings encouraged unconditional self-sacrificing love for [[God]] and for <i>all</i> people (someone should tell the [[fundamentalists]] about that bit), and in fact [[Hell|eternal punishment]] for non-belief in Jesus. During these sermons, he also discussed service and humility, forgiveness of sins, how [[faith]] should be applied, the [[Golden Rule]], and the necessity of following the spirit of the law as well as its wording.

Jesus also often conversed with social outcasts, such as the publican (Roman tax collectors who were unpopular for their practice of extorting money), and [[prostitutes]].

During the trial of Jesus by the Sanhedrin, a court-like body made up of [[Pharisee]]s and Sadducees, highly orthodox and [[conservative]] members of the Jewish community, the high priests and elders asked Jesus, "Are you the Son of God?," and when he replied, "You say that I am," they condemned Jesus for [[blasphemy]] ({{bible|Luke|22|70}}–71).

===Did Jesus have a sex life?===
The traditional Christian view is that Jesus was [[celibate]]. 

Recent discoveries, specifically the [[apocrypha]]l Gospels of [[Gospel of Mary|Mary]], [[Gospel of Judas|Judas]], [[Gospel of Thomas|Thomas]] and [[Gospel of Philip|Philip]] suggest to some that Jesus was romantically involved with [[Mary Magdalene]]. It would have been unusual for a Jew of his age to be unmarried in the first century; putting aside the absence of any description of this aspect of Jesus' life in the canonical books, as well as the traditional Christian theological perspective that he was celibate, the view that a human man residing in first century Judea was married is not so implausible.
 
Some speculate that Jesus was [[gay]],<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20020624055834/http://www.petertatchell.net/religion/jesus.htm Was Jesus Gay? Questions the sexuality of Jesus Christ] by Peter Tatchell (archived from June 24, 2002).</ref> given his comments about his relationship to his "most beloved disciple," traditionally associated with the young [[Apostle#John son of Zebedee|John]], and his speech about two men in bed and two women grinding together ({{bible|Luke|17|34|35}}), while others dismiss these claims as misinterpretations of the texts and of the epoch's customs.<ref>Robert A. J. Gagnon, ''The Bible and homosexual practice'' (2001)</ref><ref>Abraham Rihbany, ''The Syrian Christ'' (1916)</ref> Hey, sometimes "preferring the company of men" is {{wpl|Platonic love|just that|.}}

Since the Gospels actually say nothing about Jesus being [[marriage|married]] or single, no one can authoritatively assert anything about Jesus' marital status. Valid arguments exist to both support and counter the idea that Jesus would have been married.<ref>[http://www.religionfacts.com/da_vinci_code/jesus_married.htm 
Was Jesus Married?] ''(Last Updated January 10, 2017)</ref> If there were women disciples, they would likely have been attracted to Jesus as the leader of a religious movement and a prophet of God. (Who wouldn't be?) Certainly unless Jesus was in some way abnormal, women followers would have been willing to marry him and follow him on his wanderings, as Mary Magdalene supposedly did. Of course, he was 30 (give or take) at the time of his ministry, an age far past the age of a first marriage for a man. Also, in first century Israel, celibacy was disfavored and, in fact, Hebrew traditionalists assert that a man must "be fruitful and multiply" in order to fulfill God's will. Yet there were several groups, most specifically the [[Gnostic]]s and Essenes, who, in pursuit of greater [[spirituality]], eschewed physical contact (including marriage and sexual contact).<ref>[http://blog.beliefnet.com/markdroberts/pages/series/was-jesus-married.html/ Was Jesus Married? A Careful Look at the Real Evidence] by Mark D. Roberts (2010) ''Beliefnet'' (archived from July 7, 2010).</ref>

===Jesus' not-so-good deeds===
[[File:Cristo Redentor - Rio de Janeiro, Brasil.jpg|thumb|right|225px|Christ asserts his dominance with a T-pose.]]
{{cquote|But those enemies of mine who did not want me to be [[Totalitarianism|king over them]] — bring them here and [[Murder|kill them in front of me]]. 
<ref group=note>This is said by some king in a parable of Jesus.</ref>|||Jesus ({{bible|Luke|19|27}})}}
While Jesus preached some [[revolution]]ary ideas about being a decent person, he also said and did a few questionable things:
*One day, cranky and hungry, Jesus destroyed a fig tree simply because it did not bear fruit for him (out of season no less).<ref>{{bible|Matthew|21|18|22}}; {{bible|Mark|11|12|14}}, {{bible|Mark|11|19|25}}</ref> While he later clarified that he destroyed the healthy fig tree in an attempt to display the power of faith ({{bible|Matthew|21|21}}), one might ask why he didn't use his powers in a more productive manner.
*Jesus appears to demand total devotion from his followers, to the point that they need to turn their backs on every other aspect of their lives. In {{bible|Luke|14|26}} he tells potential followers that "If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters — yes, even their own life — such a person cannot be my disciple." He even went so far in {{bible|Matthew|8|21-22}} and {{bible|Luke|9|59|60}} as to insist a man follow him immediately rather than bury his dead father first (which would seem to contradict the Commandment to respect one's parents).
*In {{bible|Luke|9|61|62}}, Jesus tells a man who wishes to follow him that "No one, having put his hand to the plow, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God," and thus appears to put [[religious]] devotion before human community. 
*In {{bible|Matthew|15|1|6}}, Jesus replied to the [[Pharisee]]s calling him out for breaking with tradition by accusing them of disobeying the mandate that "Anyone who curses their father or mother is to be put to death." Jesus thus appears, on the surface, to put following divine law before valuing human life. 
* In {{bible|Matthew|15|13}}, Jesus, quite opposite to today's increasingly popular {{wpl|Tree planting|tree}} {{wpl|Tree plantation|plantation}} attitude, said the trees which were not planted by God (the trees which did not grow naturally, but rather by people) will be uprooted.
*In {{Bible|Matthew|10|34|35}}, Jesus — contrary to his rather universal look as a complete [[pacifist]] — said he did not come to bring peace but a sword and said he would put one family member against another family member.
*In {{Bible|Matthew|18|15|17}}, he says if someone sins, point out their sin. And if they won't listen, go and harass them with one or two others. And if they still won't listen, get the whole church on their case. And if they still won't listen, then [[Shunning|shun]] them. No way this could be subject to abuse.
*In {{bible|Mark|11|24}}, Jesus tells his disciples: "Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in [[prayer]], believe that you have received it, and it will be yours." This passage can be read as a justification for a particularly [[Prosperity Gospel|greed-centered approach to faith]].
*In {{bible|Matthew|15|22|26}}, Jesus compares a [[Canaan]]ite woman, who begs him to heal her sick daughter, to a [[dog]], because she is not an Israelite. (He did eventually heal the girl, but only after her mother offered a witty comeback.<ref>{{bible|Matthew|15|28}}</ref>)
*In {{bible|Mark|5|1|20}} {{Bible|Matthew|8|28|34}} {{bible|Luke|8|26|39}} Jesus causes a swine herd (herd of pigs) numbering about two thousand to drown and die in the lake.

Here is Michael Paulkovich's criticism of Jesus as a moral teacher:<ref name="Paulkovich">{{cite book| title = No Meek Messiah| edition = 1st| last = Paulkovich| first = Michael| year = 2012| publisher = Spillix Publishing| id = ISBN 0988216116| pages = 274}}</ref>
{{Cquote|Jesus was no perfect man, no meek or wise messiah: in fact his philosophies were and are largely immoral, often violent, as well as shallow and irrational. There have been many proposed sons of god, and this Jesus person is no more valid or profound than his priestly precursors. In fact, his contemporary Apollonius was unquestionably the superior logician and philosopher. …Christianity has caused more terror and torture and murder than any similar phenomenon.}}

…On the other hand, some of these could very well not have been intended to be taken literally, or at least not as harsh as they sound at face value; as demonstrated by the previously-mentioned parables, Jesus didn't always make his points very directly.

===Reasons to like him===
[[File:Liberation Jesus.jpeg|thumb|right|300px|Jesus beats the shit out of some bankers.]]
{{cquote|Jesus was way cool<BR>
Everybody liked Jesus<BR>
Everybody wanted to hang out with him<BR>
Anything he wanted to do, he did<BR>
He turned [[water]] into [[wine]]<BR>
And if he wanted to<BR>
He could have turned wheat into [[marijuana]]<BR>
Or sugar into [[cocaine]]<BR>
Or vitamin pills into [[amphetamines]]|||''Jesus Was Way Cool'' by ''King Missile''}}

Jesus did a lot of good stuff — according to the Gospels, anyway — which would irritate some members of the [[Religious Right]] in America, if practiced today.

For example:
*He provided [[universal healthcare]] (though sometimes grudgingly, see above), and did not charge for services.
*He told people not to pursue vast riches ({{bible|Luke|12|15}}), because it would make them unhappy, and that the "love of [[money]] is the root of all sorts of [[evil]]." (Contrast with [[Name it and claim it]].)
*He did not praise the rich, and said that they should give their money to the poor ({{bible|Matthew|19|21}}).
*He told people to forgive rather than punish, because they themselves were guilty of many things: another of his teachings that the Religious Right is ''not'' down with.{{cn}}
*He told us that "peacemakers", not hawks or [[war]]mongers, were blessed ({{bible|Matthew|5|9}}).  He made up for it later, though, by saying that he came not to bring peace but a sword, but many disagree, as he also could mean that peace will not exist, but he has a sword to fight the evil. It really can't be stressed enough that metaphors in the Bible seem to be an obsession — hmm, just like fiction. ({{bible|Matthew|10|34}}).
*In {{bible|Luke|14|13}}, he told people to bring the poor and maimed around to have dinner together.
*He did not believe in strict enforcement of the Sabbath, if it was bad for people ({{bible|Mark|2|27}}).
*He denounced big public displays of [[religion]], which would presumably include [[televangelism]] today (ooh, don't tell some of the fundies that — oh no) ({{bible|Matthew|6|5}}).
*He turned water into wine ({{bible|John|2|7|9}}). We can all get behind that — except, of course, for [[Clean living movement|those silly]] [[Prohibition|Prohibitionist]] types.

===Reasons to dislike him===
{{cquote|I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.|||Jesus, speaking like a true [[cult]] leader ({{bible|John|14|6}})}}
*He offered no practical political alternative to an embattled and occupied people in the Middle East. Granted, [[War|the option people eventually went with]] {{wpl|Siege of Jerusalem (AD 70)|did not turn out much better|.}}
*He clearly likely believed his death would mean the [[end of the world]] before the last witness present had died — we're still waiting (and so is {{wpl|Wandering Jew|the wandering Jew|).}}
*He got very angry at those who didn't believe his claims, which is (also?) a common sign of [[crank]]ery.
*He used [[exorcism]] as an excuse to kill [[Fun:Pig|pigs]] (see: {{bible|Mark|5|1|20}}, {{Bible|Matthew|8|28|34}}, {{bible|Luke|8|26|39}})

==Jesus' death and resurrection==
{{main|Resurrection of Jesus}}
A central tenet of the mainstream Christian faith is that [[Jesus Christ]] died and rose again, as we all shall. Unfortunately, there's scant evidence for this.

===Jesus' body===
{{main|Relic}}
Various parts of Jesus's body and objects he touched are venerated by different Christians as [[relic]]s. Because his body supposedly returned to life and ascended to Heaven, the main outstanding part is said to be the [[Holy Foreskin]]. There are relics from his life such as his robe and the [[Holy Grail]], and even less probably bits of his crib and the gifts of the [[Magi]]; relics from the Crucifixion, such as splinters of the cross, nails, the [[Holy Lance]] used to stab him, thorns from the crown of thorns, and the Veil of Veronica used to mop his brow; and relics from his entombment such as the [[Shroud of Turin]] (claimed to be his burial shroud) and Sudarium of Oviedo.<ref>{{wpa|Relics associated with Jesus}}</ref>

In medieval times, it was common to pay devotion to a ''mensura Christi'' or ''longitudino Christi'', which was an object or length marked in a book that corresponded to a fraction of Jesus's height, commonly 1/15th but sometimes 1/12th or 1/20th of a full-length Jesus.<ref>[https://books.google.co.uk/books?id=o-5VpyGAHSgC&lpg=PA143&ots=5OrIu3ky0X&dq=mensura%20christi&pg=PA143#v=onepage&q=mensura%20christi&f=false Binding Words: Textual Amulets in the Middle Ages], Don C. Skemer, Penn State Press, 2010</ref><ref>"As Long as the King’s Arm?", James Vincent, London Review of Books, Vol. 42 No. 5, 5 March 2020</ref> It was commonly believed, based on various early Christian references, that Jesus was 4 ft 6 (137 cm) high, below average height even in his own time; some early traditions held that he was deformed or crippled; Celsus, a 2nd-century anti-Christian philosopher called him "ugly and small".<ref>{{wpa|Race and appearance of Jesus}}</ref>

==Alternate perceptions==
Many non-[[Bible#The issue of "Canon"|canon]]ical Gospels present Jesus from an alternative perspective, and the apostles as well.  For example, in {{bible|Matthew|10|34}}, Jesus claims to bring not peace, but "fire and a sword."  The same line is duplicated in the non-canonical Gospel of Thomas, in which Jesus is presented as a wise teacher of neo-[[Plato]]nist, Gnostic Judaism.  It is hard to reconcile this line with the popular modern perception of Jesus, leading many to believe that the real person Jesus, and his real ministry, were likely much more complicated than modern Christianity maintains, and interpreted differently by different people.

Similarly, the acts that Jesus inspired in his followers differ according to different tales.  Christianity emerged, as a result of [[Paul of Tarsus|Pauline]] leadership, as a steady-state religion that could weave subtly into the fabric of the Roman Empire.  Other tales of Jesus and his followers, though, make him out to be ''much'' more of a revolutionary.  For example, a tale exists called the ''Acts of Paul & Thecla'', in which Paul treats a Roman woman as his equal and fellow in Christ, leading her to oppose the Roman way of life and seek spiritual peace in a much more Gnostic sense.  In this tale, Paul also appears as much more of a social revolutionary than we have come to know him.  ''Acts'' was a popular story in the early Roman world.  However, it has largely vanished, as a result of its lack of incorporation into the canon.

It is possible that this revolutionary, original personality of the Jesus movement was deliberately abandoned by Paul in his attempt to popularize the religion.  Also abandoned by Paul were the strong Jewish roots of Christianity.  Plus he's likely responsible for Christianity's puritannical attitude toward sex, given his Roman roots.

===Ideas about the nature of Jesus===

<blockquote>
The claim at the heart of the Christian faith is that Jesus of Nazareth was, and is, God. But this is not what the original disciples believed during Jesus's lifetime — and it is not what Jesus claimed about himself.<ref>''How Jesus Became God: The Exaltation of a Jewish Preacher from Galilee'' by Bart D. Ehrman (2015) HarperCollins. ISBN 0061778192.</ref>
</blockquote>

The nature of Jesus has caused much debate over the years. Various views include:

#Jesus had only one, divine nature. (Monophysitism)
#Jesus existed as two different persons, the mortal man and the divine ''Logos'', which co-existed in one body. ([[Nestorianism]])
#Sort of a compromise between the previous two, decided at a conference called the [[Council of Nicaea]] (325 [[CE]]) and the later Council of Chalcedon (451 CE), resulting in the Chalcedonian or orthodox Christian view.
#Jesus was a divine being, but separate from, created by, and subservient to God the Father. ([[Arianism]], [[Mormonism]], [[Jehovah's Witnesses]])
#Jesus was wholly God and his human form an illusion. (Docetism)
#Jesus had two natures in one person, a human and a divine, but only one [[will]]. (Monothelitism)
#Jesus was a prophet of God, but not divine in any way. (Ebionitism, [[Islam]])
#Jesus was a [[psychic]] man.
#{{wpl|Mental health of Jesus|Jesus was a psychotic man|.}}
#Jesus was some kind of guru who'd been to India, Tibet, etc.
#Jesus never existed<ref>See [http://www.jesusneverexisted.com/ Jesus never existed] by Kenneth Humphreys</ref> — which suggests that Jesus was more of a concept than a person and that there were numerous people called Jesus in the first century CE (with the biblical Jesus possibly being some sort of conglomeration of the preachers who actually did exist).
#Jesus was just this guy, you know. This version does get a nice [[Mary Magdalene|consolation prize]].

For most of the [[Middle Ages]], option #3 gained popular favor, partly due to the [[Inquisition|slight risk of being executed]] if on the losing side of the argument.

===Alien Jesus===
{{hatnote|For [[apocrypha]]l [[Scripture|scriptural]] support of this theory, see our article on [[Nag Hammadi library#The wonders of Barbelo|the wonders of Barbelo]].}}
There are people who appear to believe that Jesus was an [[Extraterrestrial|alien]] or that aliens brought Jesus to [[Earth]].  Many websites are devoted to this idea,<ref>[http://www.alienjesus.com/who-is-alien-jesus/ This one shows Jesus as a "Green Man from Outer Space"], for example</ref> although they appear to have crossed over the [[Poe's Law|Poe Line]].

[[Raëlism]] claims that Jesus is an alien-human hybrid, and that the "virgin birth" actually refers to ''in vitro'' fertilization. They also claim that Jesus currently lives on another planet, that their leader Raël met him when he visited this planet, and that Raël and Jesus are half-brothers (their father Yahweh is the President of the aliens' government).

In 2025, a storefront church opened, known as "The Alien Church". The church has the slogan, "“If you believe in Jesus, you believe in aliens." Minister Jah of the church told a reporter unprompted, "We are not a cult."<ref>[https://www.sfgate.com/la/article/alien-church-downtown-la-ufo-religions-20242099.php 'We are not a cult': Alternative California church hits a nerve] by Paula Mejía (Aug 15, 2025) ''SFGate''.</ref> The church unsurprisingly relies on [[AI]] slop for its promotional materials.<ref>[https://www.instagram.com/themindevolvers/ The Alien Church] by themindevolvers (2025) ''Instagram''.</ref>

===Jesus and incest===
If it was God-the-Father, or even the Holy Spirit who impregnated Mary, mother of Jesus, and if all three, Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are in fact the same being, it raises some troubling questions about exactly [[Incest|who did what to whom]].

===Human sacrifice===
The  most basic tenet of Christianity is that Jesus was essentially a [[human sacrifice]], but also, depending on your conception of Jesus, a deicide. It is the foundation of the entire religion.  Given the tenets of mainstream Christianity, its basic belief could be summed up as "God required a human sacrifice before he would allow himself to forgive us for something we didn't do."

===Cannibalism===
It would appear Jesus is advocating either real or symbolic [[cannibalism]] when he says, "Most assuredly, I say to you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink His blood, you have no life in you. "Whoever eats My flesh and drinks My blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day. For My flesh is food indeed, and My blood is drink indeed" is pretty hard to deny. There are three ways to take this; most loosely, one could say he was just speaking off the cuff, so to speak, and didn't intend this to be taken seriously.  More devout, but sensible, Christians interpret Communion to be a symbolic eating of Christ's flesh (which would make it merely ''ritual'' cannibalism), but the Catholic Church insists that parishoners are eating the physical body and drinking the physical blood of Christ, while simultaneously tooth-and-nail [[denialism|denying]] that this amounts to cannibalism. Truly, the Lord (like his followers) acts in mysterious ways.

===Alternative lineage===
The followers of Jesus, many years later, came up with a more complicated lineage of Jesus (the [[Nicene Creed]]), that either Jesus is his own father (if the three entities of the Holy Trinity are each other) or God the Father isn't exactly the father of Jesus (if the three entities of the Trinity are not each other).  Hence, when Jesus said "Father", it can refer to any one of Joseph, Himself, God the Father, or the Holy Spirit. This does raise the important theological question whether, if Jesus had a son, {{wpl|I'm My Own Grandpa|he would be his own grandpa|.}}

===Jewish views of Jesus===
{{hatnote|See also: [[Messiah#Judaism's view of the Messiah (מָשִׁ֫יחַ)|Judaism's view of the Messiah]]}}
{{hatnote|See also: [[Messiah#Jewish views on Jesus' alleged messianship|Jewish views on Jesus' alleged messianship]]}}

The Jewish People regard Jesus of Nazareth as a false Messiah, since he did not fulfill any of the messianic prophecies.

According to Judaism, the true Messiah must:
*Be an observant Jewish man descended from the house of King David
*Be an ordinary human being (as opposed to the biological Son of God) 
*Bring peace to the world
*Gather all Jews back into Israel
*Rebuild the ancient Temple in [[Jerusalem]]
*Unite humanity in the worship of [[YHWH|יהוה‎]] (<choose>
<option weight=30>[[YHWH|Yahweh]]</option>
<option weight=4>[[YHWH|Elohim]]</option>
<option weight=4>[[YHWH|Adonai]]</option>
<option weight=4>[[YHWH|Ehyeh-Asher-Ehyeh]]</option>
<option weight=4>[[YHWH|Eloah]]</option>
<option weight=4>[[YHWH|'Elyon]]</option>
<option weight=4>[[YHWH|Shaddai]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Shalom]]</option>
<option weight=1>[[YHWH|Adonai Elohe Tzevaot]]</option>
<option weight=1>[[YHWH|Elohe Tzevaot]]</option>
<option weight=4>[[YHWH|HaMakom]]</option>
<option weight=4>[[YHWH|HaShem]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Adir]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Adon Olam]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Aibishter]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Aleim]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Avinu Malkeinu]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Boreh]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Ehiyeh sh'Ehiyeh]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Elohei Avraham, Elohei Yitzchak ve Elohei Ya`aqov]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Elohei Sara, Elohei Rivka, Elohei Leah ve Elohei Rakhel]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|El ha-Gibbor]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Emet]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|E'in Sof]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|HaKadosh, Baruch Hu]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Kadosh Israel]]</option>
<option weight=1>[[YHWH|Melech HaMelachim]]</option>
<option weight=1>[[YHWH|Melech Malchei HaMelachim]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Magen Avraham]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Ribbono shel `Olam]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Ro'eh Yisra'el]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|יהוה-Yireh]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|יהוה-Rapha]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|יהוה-Niss"i]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|יהוה-Ra-ah]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|יהוה-Tsidkenu]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|יהוה-Shammah]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Tzur Israel]]</option>
</choose>) and [[Torah]] observance<ref>[http://judaism.about.com/od/judaismbasics/a/Jewish-View-Of-Jesus.htm Man or Messiah: The Role of Jesus in Judaism] by Ariela Pelaia (Updated February 15, 2019) ''Learn Religions''.</ref>

Further Jews interpret the [[Old Testament]] as saying that [[YHWH|יהוה‎]] (<choose>
<option weight=30>[[YHWH|Yahweh]]</option>
<option weight=4>[[YHWH|Elohim]]</option>
<option weight=4>[[YHWH|Adonai]]</option>
<option weight=4>[[YHWH|Ehyeh-Asher-Ehyeh]]</option>
<option weight=4>[[YHWH|Eloah]]</option>
<option weight=4>[[YHWH|`Elyon]]</option>
<option weight=4>[[YHWH|Shaddai]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Shalom]]</option>
<option weight=1>[[YHWH|Adonai Elohe Tzevaot]]</option>
<option weight=1>[[YHWH|Elohe Tzevaot]]</option>
<option weight=4>[[YHWH|HaMakom]]</option>
<option weight=4>[[YHWH|HaShem]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Adir]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Adon Olam]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Aibishter]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Aleim]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Avinu Malkeinu]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Boreh]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Ehiyeh sh'Ehiyeh]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Elohei Avraham, Elohei Yitzchak ve Elohei Ya`aqov]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Elohei Sara, Elohei Rivka, Elohei Leah ve Elohei Rakhel]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|El ha-Gibbor]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Emet]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|E'in Sof]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|HaKadosh, Baruch Hu]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Kadosh Israel]]</option>
<option weight=1>[[YHWH|Melech HaMelachim]]</option>
<option weight=1>[[YHWH|Melech Malchei HaMelachim]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Magen Avraham]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Ribbono shel `Olam]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Ro'eh Yisra'el]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|יהוה-Yireh]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|יהוה-Rapha]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|יהוה-Niss"i]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|יהוה-Ra-ah]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|יהוה-Tsidkenu]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|יהוה-Shammah]]</option>
<option weight=2>[[YHWH|Tzur Israel]]</option>
</choose>) gave a complete [[Tanakh]] and everlasting covenant while Christians claim that Jesus gave a new covenant. The two views are incompatible.<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20051019234443/http://judaism.about.com/od/jewishviewofjesus/a/jesus_nobel.htm Why Can't a Jew believe in Jesus?] by Bruce James (Baruch Gershom) ''About.com'' (archived from October 19, 2005).</ref> Jews interpret the [[Ten Commandments#First Commandment|First Commandment]] that having Jesus as well as the father is idolatry. Jews interpret {{bible|Numbers|23|19}} as indicating that God is neither a man nor a mortal.<ref>[http://www.chabad.org/library/bible_cdo/aid/9951/jewish/Chapter-23.htm Bamidbar — Numbers — Chapter 23] ''Chabad''.</ref> [[Messianic Judaism]] has tried to reconcile this.{{fact}}

===Islamic views of Jesus===
Muslims, who refer to Jesus as "Isa", believe they take the middle ground on Jesus. Muslims consider Jesus one of the most important prophets, the Messiah as predicted in the Torah, and a precursor to [[Muhammad]]. They believe he was born of a virgin and performed miracles throughout his ministry. They do not believe he is [[Allah|God]] incarnate, and they believe that he ascended into heaven without being crucified or resurrected – the crucifixion was only an illusion created by God. Some among Muslim theologians such as Abu Ja'far Muhammad ibn 'Ali ibn Babawayh al-Qummi (commonly referred to by Shi'as as al-Saduq) believed he died.<ref name="As-Saduq">{{cite book
| title = A Shi'ite Creed (I'tiqadatu 'l-Imamiyyah)
| edition = 3rd
| last = as-Saduq
| first = as-Shaykh
|Translated by = Asaf A. A. Fyzee
| year = 1999
| publisher = Tehran: WOIS
| pages = 60}}</ref> Jesus also plays a prominent role in Islamic end times, returning to defeat evil once and for all. The Twelver [[Shi'a]] sect believes Jesus will return together with the [[Imam Mahdi|Mahdi]].

As such, the Islamic vision of Jesus is, ''[[Irony|ironically]]'', closer to fulfill the messianic propheties than the Christian vision of Jesus.<ref group=note>Isa fulfills at least one prophecy: being an ordinary man.</ref>

It is worth noting that, while Muslims do not believe Jesus was the Messiah, they still consider him an important prophet.  Consequently, in arguments with Christians they are at a disadvantage: Christians can say any bad thing they want about Muhammad, but Muslims are bound not to disrespect Jesus.

===Maimonides' view of Jesus===
In Judaism, Jesus is generally not considered to be the Messiah. One understanding of the messiah is based on the writings of [[Maimonides]] (also known as ''Rambam'' 
thank you mam
). His views on the messiah are discussed in his Mishneh Torah, his fourteen-volume compendium of Jewish law. According to Maimonides:

{{cquote|As for Jesus of Nazareth, who claimed to be the Anointed One and was condemned by the Sanhedrin. [[Daniel]] had already prophesied about him, thus: 'And the children of your people's rebels shall raise themselves to set up prophecy and will stumble.' (Ibid. 14) Can there be a bigger stumbling block than this? All the Prophets said that the Anointed One saves Israel and rescues them, gathers their strayed ones and strengthens their ''mitzvot'' whereas this one caused the loss of Israel by sword, and to scatter their remnant and humiliate them, and to change the Torah and to cause most of the world to erroneously worship a god besides the Lord. But the human mind has no power to reach the thoughts of the Creator, for his thoughts and ways are unlike ours. All these matters of Yeshu of Nazareth and of Muhammad who stood up after him are only intended to pave the way for the Anointed King, and to mend the entire world to worship God together, thus: 'For then I shall turn a clear tongue to the nations to call all in the Name of the Lord and to worship him with one shoulder.'

How is this? The entire world had become filled with the issues of the Anointed One and of the Torah and the Laws, and these issues had spread out unto faraway islands and among many nations [[circumcision|uncircumcised]] in the heart, and they discuss these issues and the Torah's laws. These say: These Laws were true but are already defunct in these days, and do not rule for the following generations; whereas the other ones say: There are secret layers in them and they are not to be treated literally, and the Messiah had come and revealed their secret meanings. But when the Anointed King will truly rise and succeed and will be raised and uplifted, they all immediately turn about and know that their fathers inherited falsehood, and their prophets and ancestors led them astray.}}

===Precedents===
Heracles was also the son of God and a mortal female but the Greeks simply acknowledged him as a demigod. Mind you, Heracles' father was Zeus, who was known for banging literally any woman he wanted to anyway he pleased, thus fathering a lot of children. For more references, consult almost every Greek myth. Indeed, the core concept of a demigod stretches all the way back to Gilgamesh, said to be two thirds-god, one third-mortal.

In some mythological traditions, Dionysus (a Phrygian god of drunkenness, wine, and ritual madness) whose [[cult]] was imported into the Roman Empire, is killed and then resurrected. This parallel was noted even in the ancient world, with [[YHVH]] being identified, via ''interpretatio romana'', with Dionysus. Though the parallels end about there, as Dionysus was most likely a death-rebirth god so this featured prominently in his myths and actually has very little in common with YHVH aside from that. The Greeks and Romans had a tendency to invoke foreign gods as a way to make their spells more powerful. There are records that they would even invoke cultural heroes like Moses. This was a major source of conflict between Romans and Jews, followed by the Christians, as the Abrahamic religions are very clear that there is only one god. This was a big reason for the Jewish Revolts against the Roman Empire.

Many comparisons have been drawn between Jesus and the Egyptian gods Horus and Osiris, with Horus providing the Madonna-and-child symbolism and Osiris providing the death-and-rebirth narrative, common in multiple other religions.  However, Osiris does not in fact come back to life, but becomes god of the land of the dead. Some people speculate that death is relatively common in some human cultures which explains why death would be said to affect some deities without their having to rely on external myths for inspiration for a dying deity who is able to come back to life.{{fact}}

==Was there a historical Jesus who was actually named Yesus?==
{{main|Evidence for the historical existence of Jesus Christ}}
[[File:Gospel of Luke Chapter 6-18 (Bible Illustrations by Sweet Media).jpg|right|thumb|250px|Hello? Totally non-mythical man here... Can you see me?... Hello?]]
{{cquote|Modern Christianity must always reckon with the possibility of having to abandon the historical figure of [[Jesus]] … he should never be considered its foundation.|||{{wpl|Albert Schweitzer}}{{sfn|Schweitzer|1913|p=512|ps=&#46;&#32;"Das moderne Christentum muss von vornherein und immer mit der Möglichkeit einer eventuellen Preisgabe der Geschichtlichkeit Jesu rechnen."}}{{sfn|Schweitzer|2001|p=402}}}}

The historical Jesus would in actual fact have been named Yeshu or Yeshua, as Jesus was the Latinised version of the name, which a historical Jesus wouldn’t have used. Referring to the historical personage Jesus bar Joseph/Pantera by the moniker Yesus is verily apropos, Amen.

[[File:Jesus and the rich young man.jpg|thumb|right|Jesus during his obscure "Chinesus" phase.]]
[[Bart Ehrman]] holds the viewpoint that Yesus was a Jewish preacher—and teacher<ref>{{cite web |last1=Ehrman |title=The Teaching of Jesus |url=https://ehrmanblog.org/the-teaching-of-jesus/ |website=The Bart Ehrman Blog}}</ref>—crucified during the reign of Pontius Pilate, who was born into poverty and was either a carpenter or a carpenter’s son. He began his public ministry while trapped in a poverty-stricken lower-class life. Early in his ministry he was baptized by [[John the Baptist]]. He earned the enmity of the [[Pharisee]]s by causing a disturbance in the Temple, but not at the scale depicted by the Gospels. After a brief trial, Pilate personally ordered his crucifixion at the beginning of {{wpl|Passover|Pesach|,}} the holiest of Jewish holidays. Roman soldiers flogged Yesus on his way to the Cross, and he was dead within six hours, "The End" (or is it?).

One question is, if there was a real man who inspired the biblical Jesus but whose real life and character are very far from the popular myth, do we say Yesus was Jesus? If his name was Matthew and he was a drunken brawler and frequent patron of brothels, is he close enough to count? Or what if he was an itinerant preacher but didn't do or say hardly any of the things attributed to him in the gospels? Depending on where you land on this question, noting that myths tend to be inspired by a real story doesn't mean that Jesus or Yesus existed.

The [[New Testament]] is factually incorrect on many [[history|historical]] events, such as the reign of Herod and the Roman census.  Therefore, it is not clear whether Yesus was in fact a historical person.
Per the gospels, '''Historicists''' assert that these literary narratives featuring god-Jesus contain biographical data for Yesus that can be extracted. Whereas '''Biblicists''' maintain that the gospels are fictional narrative literature and do not support a historical Yesus, but they do assert some sort of historical Yesus probably existed.{{Efn|
{{cquote|
All biblicists need for someone to exist is for a literary figure to be based on a real historical person. So Jesus existed too!

It doesn’t really matter if Olive Oyl, or Dr. Watson existed, or Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer. These additional literary characters are not relevant to the “historically certain” fact that Popeye, Sherlock Holmes, and Santa Claus were based on historically attested figures. So likewise, it doesn’t really matter if Lazarus or Judas Iscariot or Joseph of Arimathea existed. These additional literary characters are not relevant to the “historically certain” fact that Jesus existed.|||{{wpl|John W. Loftus}}<ref>{{cite book |last1=Loftus |first1=John W. |editor1-last=Loftus |editor2-last=Price |title=Varieties of Jesus Mythicism: Did He Even Exist? |date=2021 |publisher=HYPATIA Press |isbn=978-1-83919-158-9 |url=https://books.google.com/books?id=y0i8zgEACAAJ |language=en |chapter=Preface}}</ref>}}}}

There are few extra-biblical ancient sources on Yesus' life.  All surviving mentions of Yesus in ancient times are in texts written decades or more after his supposed death.  While later Roman and Jewish sources do mention him, the gospels contradict themselves and each other on the key events.  

An important tactic of conservative Christians in their attempts to dominate the world is to try to use [[science]] to prove that Yesus really did exist.  Ironically, their attempts to do this are not blocked or dismissed by scholars, because many, if not most, scholars already accept the idea that Yesus was a real man who, in or around 30 CE, was acting as teacher, [[Mysticism|mystic]], [[Spiritualism|spiritualist]], [[Faith healing|healer]], political activist, or religious revolutionary. The scholarly claims are primarily made and backed up not by historical records, of which there are a precious few, but through accepted claims on the nature of mythology and new religions.<ref>Journal for the Study of the Historical Yesus; J.D. Crossan, The Historical Yesus (ISBN-10: 0060616296)</ref>

#It is traditionally accepted that myths generally do not derive from thin air, and that the characters and stories in these myths are exaggerations, deifications, or simple mischaracterizations of events and persons that really existed and did ''something'' of some kind of note.
#Within 10 years of each other, 10-20 churches "pop up" throughout Jerusalem and the Aramaic world which all name the Christ character "Jesus."

But fear not, good [[atheists]], [[agnostic]]s, and all those who routinely battle fundamentalist Christians or other pushy types. Just because a dude "likely existed" and if so, was seemingly observed roaming the countryside, preaching the splendor of faith in the great architect of the cosmos {{wpl|Parable of the Mustard Seed|using vegetables as visual aids|,}} this in no way validates anything that is in the Biblical accounts of the mythic Christ character that resulted from Christian myth being applied like varnish on top of the life of Yesus.{{efn|
<blockquote>[T]he historic Jesus is something different from the Jesus Christ of the doctrine of the Two Natures … We can, at the present day, scarcely imagine the long agony in which ''the historical view of the life of Jesus'' [Leben-Jesu-Forschung ''tr.'' "Life of Jesus Research"] came to birth… [Schweitzer 1910, pp. 3–4. NOW WITH EMPHASIS]</blockquote> 
• Schweitzer, Albert (1910) [1906 in German] (in en). ''The Quest of the Historical Jesus: A Critical Study of Its Progress from Reimarus to Wrede [Geschichte der Leben-Jesu-Forschung]''. London: A. and C. Black. translated by W. Montgomery. 
<blockquote>Hugh Anderson states that ‘All the Gospel materials bearing on the life of Jesus were so assiduously studied by liberal Protestant theologians that within the space of a few generations, some sixty thousand biographies, so it is estimated, had been produced’</blockquote>
• {{cite book |last1=Stevens |first1=Jennifer |title=The Historical Jesus and the Literary Imagination, 1860-1920 |date=2010 |publisher=Liverpool University Press |isbn=978-1-84631-470-4 |language=en| pages=72f, n.3}} ([https://www.jstor.org/stable/pdf/j.ctt5vjbx8.7.pdf Available Online])}}
That is to say, even if we could prove the existence of Yesus of Nazareth beyond the shadow of a doubt, that would hardly prove that he died. Well, he died. But it hardly proves his daddy brought him back to life, holes in his hands and all.{{efn|{{cquote|Once upon a time—way back when the overwhelming majority of people were illiterate—God decided that the best way to tell people about himself was to write a book. That is, so the theologians assure us, he inspired humans to write it for him. Dropping a book in an illiterate world? This doesn’t strike us as a good plan, and it went downhill. Once the book was finally finished, God neglected to find a way to prevent mistakes as the manuscripts were copied by hand for centuries: thousands of errors were made. Scholars still haven’t been able to figure out for sure the wording of the original manuscripts. And, for centuries, God couldn’t find a way to make the book available to the masses.|||David Madison<ref>{{cite web |last1=Madison |first1=David |title=The Absence of a Human Jesus |url=https://www.debunking-christianity.com/2022/02/the-absence-of-human-jesus.html |date=4 February 2022}} ''Debunking Christianity''.</ref>}}}}

In fact, some brave atheists contend that Christian mythology, like most mythology, is false or just plain silly if taken as fact about the natural universe (a claim that for centuries would have caused the Christians to burn the Heretics at the stake, or somesuch). Historian Dr. Richard Carrier is one such atheist who makes this claim in his academically published, double-blind, peer-reviewed publication on the subject of the magic man held so dear to so many Christian (and Muslim) hearts. In ''On the Historicity of Yesus: Why we Might Have Reason for Doubt,'' Carrier estimates, at best, the odds that Yesus existed are 1 in 3 (p. 599) but when the other factors are added in it drops to 1 in 12,000 (p. 600). He does this by ascribing subjective numerical probabilities to the extraordinary claims that are so central to the beliefs of Christians. While this argument is dangerously similar to creationists' [[Creationist mathematics|fallacious use of big numbers]], it does have the delicious irony of using their own line of reasoning against them. In their “walk with Christ”, Christians could be said, by Carrier's estimation, to be “walking with an imaginary friend”, one with as much relevance to actual historical reality as Harry Potter. Onward, Hufflepuff soldiers! But please, keep your Hogwarts out of our schools and secular constitutional democracies, thanks!

===Racism===
Yesus was a Jew and likely dark-skinned,<ref>https://www.history.com/news/what-did-Yesus-look-like</ref> spoke Aramaic rather than some [[King James Only|European language that would not exist for at least a thousand years]],<ref>https://www.bbc.com/news/blogs-magazine-monitor-27587230</ref> contrary to many popular depictions of Yesus as a [[White supremacy|Krazy Kracker with NordiK features]]. Assuming the historicity of Yesus, the fact that the historic Yesus of Nazareth was a Jew of [[Middle East]]ern descent directly challenges many of the [[Antisemitism|anti-Semitic]] attitudes that have characterized elements of Christianity since early times.

==See also==
{{fun|Jesus|Jesus Christ}}
{{collist|2|
*[[Christology]]
*[[Genealogy of Jesus]]
*[[Images of Jesus]]
*[[Infancy Gospel of Thomas]]
*[[Jerusalem syndrome]]
*[[Jesus with erection]]
*[[Lying for Jesus]]
*''[[The Passion of the Christ]]''
*[[Priory of Sion]] — the supposed story of Jesus' family.
*[[Red-Letter Christians]] — Christians who care more for the words of Christ than being judgmental.
*[[Surviving crucifixion]]
*The [[True Cross]] — the supposed cross Jesus was crucified on, pieces of which were sold to the gullible by [[Con artist|con men]] over the centuries.  If all the pieces of the "True Cross" were collected and assembled in their original configuration, it would form an [[Noah's Ark|ark]].
}}

==External links==
*[http://www.newyorker.com/arts/critics/atlarge/2010/05/24/100524crat_atlarge_gopnik What Did Jesus Do? Reading and Unreading the Gospels] by Adam Gopnik, ''The New Yorker''
*[http://www.jesuspuzzle.com/ The Jesus Puzzle], Earl Doherty

==Notes==
{{reflist|group=note|2|80%}}

==Bibliography==
{{refbegin}}
* {{cite book |last1=Schweitzer |first1=Albert |title=Geschichte der Leben-Jesu-Forschung |date=1913 |publisher=Mohr |location=Tübingen |edition= 2nd revised and expanded |origyear=1906, 1st ed.|language=de |ref=harv}}
* {{cite book |last1=Schweitzer |first1=Albert |title=The Quest of the Historical Jesus |trans_title=Geschichte der Leben-Jesu-Forschung|date=2001 |origyear=1913 in German |publisher=Fortress Press |isbn=978-1-4514-0354-1 }}
{{refend}}

==References==
{{reflist|2|80%}}

{{Biblebox}}

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Categories: Authoritarianism, Biblical figures, Christmas, Convicted felons, Deities, Frequently misquoted people, Islam, Jesus, Jews, Judaism, Messianic claimants, New Testament, One true gods, Prophets, Purity culture, Religious leaders, We're on a mission from God