Writing prompt: Evacuation Drill

Student essay:
Dear students
I am in honour of standing to make a speech there
As we all know ,safety is important for everyone .Our school hold the evacuation drill every year so that we could master the knowledge and skill that we can use to solve the urgent problems.However,some students do not take it seriously.For example,some syudents escape from the spot laughing ang talking .And some students eating while they are running. There are some suggestions for us students when we take part in the evacuation drill.
To start with, we should keep clam and quiet,follow teachers direction.What's more we are supposed ti learn to protect not only ourselves but also the people around ud.
That's all what I want to say . Thanks for your listenning.
Yours sincsrely
Li Hua

Corrected essay:
Dear students,
I am honoured to stand here to make a speech.
As we all know, safety is important for everyone. Our school holds the evacuation drill every year so that we can master the knowledge and skill that we can use to solve the urgent problems. However, some students do not take it seriously. For example, some students escape from the spot, laughing and talking. And some students are eating while they are running. There are some suggestions for us students when we take part in the evacuation drill.
To start with, we should keep calm and quiet and follow teachers' directions. What's more, we are supposed to learn to protect not only ourselves but also the people around us.
That's all I want to say. Thanks for your listening.
Yours sincerely,
Li Hua

Error analysis:
error_sentence: Dear students
I am in honour of standing to make a speech there
As we all know ,safety is important for everyone .Our
correct_sentence: Dear students,
I am honoured to stand here to make a speech.

correction: ,
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Punctuation Error: According to English writing conventions, a comma 『,』 should be used after the salutation in a formal letter; therefore, 〈Dear students〉 in the original sentence needs to be changed to 『Dear students,』 to conform to English letter format standards.

error_sentence: Dear students
I am in honour of standing to make a speech there
As we all know ,safety is important for everyone .Our
correct_sentence: Dear students,
I am honoured to stand here to make a speech.

error: in honour of standing
correction: honoured to stand here
error_type: PoS Confusion Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: PoS Confusion Error: According to the context, the meaning here is “very honored to stand here”; the adjective phrase 〈in honour of〉 in the original sentence cannot directly function as a predicate verb and should be changed to an adjectival phrase; therefore, 〈in honour of standing〉 needs to be changed to 『honoured to stand here』 to fit the context.

error_sentence: Dear students
I am in honour of standing to make a speech there
As we all know ,safety is important for everyone .Our
correct_sentence: Dear students,
I am honoured to stand here to make a speech.

error: there
correction: .
error_type: Word Redundancy Error
error_severity: 5
error_description: ① Word Redundancy Error: According to the context, this place means “stand here”; the word 〈there〉 in the original sentence contradicts the preceding logic, causing redundancy, so 〈there〉 needs to be deleted to fit the context; ② Punctuation Error: According to writing conventions, a complete sentence requires a period; the original phrase 〈make a speech there〉 is structurally complete but lacks a period at the end, so it is changed to 『make a speech.』 to conform to English punctuation usage rules.

error_sentence: Dear students
I am in honour of standing to make a speech there
As we all know ,safety is important for everyone .Our school hold the evacuation drill every year so that we could master the knowledge and skill that we can use to solve the urgent problems.
correct_sentence: As we all know, safety is important for everyone. Our school holds the evacuation drill every year so that we can master the knowledge and skill that we can use to solve the urgent problems.
error: .Our school hold
correction: . Our school holds
error_type: Subject-Verb Agreement Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Space Error: According to English writing conventions, there should be a space between punctuation and a word; in the original sentence, 〈everyone .Our〉 has a space error, so 〈everyone .Our〉 needs to be changed to 『everyone. Our』 to conform to writing conventions; ② Subject-Verb Agreement Error: According to English grammar rules, the original sentence has a subject-verb agreement error; the subject 〈Our school〉 is third-person singular, and the original predicate 〈hold〉 is in the third-person plural form, so the verb 〈hold〉 needs to be changed to the third-person singular form 『holds』 to maintain subject-verb agreement.

error_sentence: school hold the evacuation drill every year so that we could master the knowledge and skill that we can use to solve the urgent problems.
correct_sentence: Our school holds the evacuation drill every year so that we can master the knowledge and skill that we can use to solve the urgent problems.
error: could
correction: can
error_type: Verb Tense Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Tense Error: According to English grammar rules, in the adverbial clause of purpose, 〈could〉 expresses hypothetical ability, whereas it is actually an objective fact; therefore, 〈could〉 needs to be changed to 『can』 to conform to the tense.

error_sentence: For example,some syudents escape from the spot laughing ang talking .And
correct_sentence: For example, some students escape from the spot, laughing and talking.
error: syudents
correction: students
error_type: Spelling Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Spelling Error: According to the meaning of the sentence, it is clear that “students” is intended here; therefore, 〈syudents〉 is a misspelling of 『students』, and 〈syudents〉 needs to be changed to 『students』 to make the sentence coherent.

error_sentence: For example,some syudents escape from the spot laughing ang talking .And
correct_sentence: For example, some students escape from the spot, laughing and talking. And some students are eating while they are running.
error: laughing ang talking .And
correction: , laughing and talking. And
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 5
error_description: ① Punctuation Error: According to English grammar rules, a comma is needed to separate the main clause and the accompanying adverbial phrase; therefore, the original 〈spot laughing〉 needs to be changed to 『spot, laughing』 to conform to grammar rules; ② Spelling Error: According to the meaning of the sentence, it is clear that “and” is intended here; therefore, 〈ang〉 is a misspelling of 『and』, and 〈ang〉 needs to be changed to 『and』 to make the sentence coherent; ③ Space Error: According to English writing conventions, there should be a space between punctuation and a word; the original 〈talking .And〉 lacks a space, so 〈talking .And〉 needs to be changed to 『talking. And』 to conform to writing conventions.

error_sentence: some students eating while they are running.
correct_sentence: And some students are eating while they are running.
correction: are
error_type: Auxiliary Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Auxiliary Error: According to English grammar rules, the present continuous tense structure in the original sentence is incomplete; therefore, 〈students eating〉 needs to be changed to 『students are eating』 to form the continuous tense, conforming to grammar rules.

error_sentence: To start with, we should keep clam and quiet,follow teachers direction.
correct_sentence: To start with, we should keep calm and quiet and follow teachers' directions.
error: clam
correction: calm
error_type: Spelling Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Spelling Error: According to the meaning of the sentence, it is clear that “calm” is intended here; therefore, 〈clam〉 is a misspelling of 『calm』, and 〈clam〉 needs to be changed to 『calm』 to make the sentence coherent.

error_sentence: To start with, we should keep clam and quiet,follow teachers direction.
correct_sentence: To start with, we should keep calm and quiet and follow teachers' directions.
error: ,
correction: and
error_type: Conjunction Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: Conjunction Error: According to English grammar rules, 〈keep clam and quiet〉 and 〈follow teachers direction〉 in the original sentence, as parallel structures, need to be connected by 『and』; therefore, the original 〈,〉 needs to be changed to 『and』 to conform to English grammar rules.

error_sentence: To start with, we should keep clam and quiet,follow teachers direction.
correct_sentence: To start with, we should keep calm and quiet and follow teachers' directions.
error: direction
correction: ' directions
error_type: Noun Possessive Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Noun Possessive Error: According to English grammar rules and the prompt requirements, the meaning here is “teachers' suggestions”; in the original sentence, 〈teachers direction〉 needs to use the possessive form to indicate its owned item, so 〈teachers direction〉 is changed to 『teachers' directions』 to fit the context; ② Noun Number Error: According to English grammar rules, 〈direction〉 in the original sentence should be in the plural form 『directions』 to express a general concept, so 〈direction〉 is changed to 『directions』 to conform to grammar rules.

error_sentence: What's more we are supposed ti learn to protect not only ourselves but also the people around ud.

correct_sentence: What's more, we are supposed to learn to protect not only ourselves but also the people around us.

correction: ,
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Punctuation Error: According to English writing conventions, when 〈What's more〉 starts a new sentence, it needs to be followed by a comma to separate it from the rest of the sentence; therefore, 〈What's more〉 is changed to 『What's more,』 to conform to writing conventions.

error_sentence: What's more we are supposed ti learn to protect not only ourselves but also the people around ud.

correct_sentence: What's more, we are supposed to learn to protect not only ourselves but also the people around us.

error: ti
correction: to
error_type: Spelling Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Spelling Error: According to the meaning of the sentence, it is clear that “to” is intended here; therefore, 〈ti〉 is a misspelling of 『to』, and 〈ti〉 needs to be changed to 『to』 to make the sentence coherent.

error_sentence: What's more we are supposed ti learn to protect not only ourselves but also the people around ud.

correct_sentence: What's more, we are supposed to learn to protect not only ourselves but also the people around us.

error: ud
correction: us
error_type: Spelling Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Spelling Error: According to the meaning of the sentence, it is clear that “us” is intended here; therefore, 〈ud〉 is a misspelling of 『us』, and 〈ud〉 needs to be changed to 『us』 to make the sentence coherent.

error_sentence: That's all what I want to say .
correct_sentence: That's all I want to say.
error: what
error_type: Word Redundancy Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: Word Redundancy Error: According to the context, 『That's all I want to say 』 directly expresses “this is all I want to say”; the word 〈what〉 in the original sentence is a redundant component and therefore needs to be deleted to make the sentence more concise and semantically clear.

error_sentence: Thanks for your listenning.

correct_sentence: Thanks for your listening.

error: listenning
correction: listening
error_type: Spelling Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Spelling Error: According to the meaning of the sentence, it is clear that “listening” is intended here; therefore, 〈listenning〉 is a misspelling of 『listening』, and 〈listenning〉 needs to be changed to 『listening』 to make the sentence coherent.

error_sentence: Yours sincsrely
Li Hua
correct_sentence: Yours sincerely,
Li Hua
error: sincsrely
correction: sincerely,
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Spelling Error: According to the meaning of the sentence, it is clear that “sincerely” is intended here; therefore, 〈sincsrely〉 is a misspelling of 『sincerely』, and 〈sincsrely〉 needs to be changed to 『sincerely』 to make the sentence coherent; ② Punctuation Error: According to English writing conventions, a comma is needed after the closing salutation; therefore, 〈sincsrely〉 needs to be changed to 『sincerely,』 to conform to letter format.