Writing prompt: My Past Life

Student essay:
By Tom Smith
I was born in Tianjin,a big city on the east coast of China,in March 13th,2002.
I had lots of friends when I was a child.My first friend's name is Zhang Zhexuan.We studyed in Shang Haidao Primary School.Zhang zhexuan was a little difficult in class but I didn't,I was very good.After class we ofen played games together.For example,we played hide-and-seek.Our first English teacher is Nancy.She was kind and friendly to us,but sometimes she was strict in our lessons.
This is my past life and I'm looking to returning my primary school with my friends again.

Corrected essay:
By Tom Smith
I was born in Tianjin, a big city on the east coast of China, on March 13th, 2002.
I had lots of friends when I was a child. My first friend's name is Zhang Zhexuan. We studied in Shang Haidao Primary School. Zhang Zhexuan felt a little difficult about class but I didn't, and I was very good. After class we often played games together. For example, we played hide-and-seek. Our first English teacher was Nancy. She was kind and friendly to us, but sometimes she was strict in our lessons.
This is my past life and I'm looking forward to returning to my primary school with my friends again.

Error analysis:
error_sentence: By Tom Smith
I was born in Tianjin,a big city on the east coast of China,in March 13th,2002.

correct_sentence: By Tom Smith
I was born in Tianjin, a big city on the east coast of China, on March 13th, 2002.

error: in March 13th,2002
correction: on March 13th, 2002
error_type: Preposition Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: ① Preposition Error: According to English grammar rules, the preposition 〈on〉 should be used for specific dates, not 〈in〉, therefore the incorrect prepositional phrase 〈in March 13th〉 is corrected to the proper prepositional structure 『on March 13th』; ② Space Error: According to English writing conventions, a space is required between the date and the year, so the incorrect format 〈,2002〉 is changed to the standard 『, 2002』.

error_sentence: We studyed in Shang Haidao Primary School.
correct_sentence: We studied in Shang Haidao Primary School.
error: studyed
correction: studied
error_type: Spelling Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Spelling Error: According to verb past tense rules, the past tense of 〈study〉 should be 〈studied〉, not 〈studyed〉, therefore it is corrected to 『studied』, expressing the meaning "to learn", to conform to correct spelling.

error_sentence: Zhang zhexuan was a little difficult in class
correct_sentence: Zhang Zhexuan felt a little difficult about class
error: zhexuan was
correction: Zhexuan felt
error_type: Verb Choice Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Case Error: According to proper noun capitalization rules, the first letter of both the surname and given name in 〈Zhang zhexuan〉 should be capitalized, so it is changed to 『Zhang Zhexuan』; ② Verb Choice Error: According to the sentence meaning, 『felt』 is more appropriate than 〈was〉 for expressing subjective feelings, therefore 〈was〉 is replaced with 『felt』 to make the meaning more accurate.

error_sentence: Zhang zhexuan was a little difficult in class
correct_sentence: Zhang Zhexuan felt a little difficult about class
error: in
correction: about
error_type: Preposition Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Preposition Error: Based on fixed collocations, the preposition 〈about〉 should be used when expressing feelings about something, not 〈in〉, therefore the incorrect collocation 〈difficult in class〉 is corrected to 『difficult about class』.

error_sentence: but I didn't,I was very good.
correct_sentence: but I didn't, and I was very good.
error: didn't,
correction: didn't, and
error_type: Conjunction Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Conjunction Error: According to English grammar rules, a conjunction is needed to connect the two independent clauses 〈I didn't〉 and 〈I was very good〉, therefore 『and』 is added to avoid a comma splice error.

error_sentence: After class we ofen played games together.
correct_sentence: After class we often played games together.
error: ofen
correction: often
error_type: Spelling Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Spelling Error: According to English vocabulary spelling rules, the adverb 〈often〉 was misspelled as 〈ofen〉, therefore it is corrected to 『often』, expressing the meaning "frequently".

error_sentence: Our first English teacher is Nancy.
correct_sentence: Our first English teacher was Nancy.
error: is
correction: was
error_type: Verb Tense Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Tense Error: According to the principle of tense consistency in context, past tense should be used to describe past events, therefore the present tense 〈is〉 is changed to the past tense 『was』 to meet tense requirements.

error_sentence: This is my past life and I'm looking to returning my primary school with my friends again.
correct_sentence: This is my past life and I'm looking forward to returning to my primary school with my friends again.
correction: forward
error_type: Verb Choice Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Verb Choice Error: According to English fixed collocations, the phrase 〈look forward to〉 should be used to express anticipation, not 〈look to〉, therefore 『forward』 is added to correct the phrasal structure to express anticipation.

error_sentence: This is my past life and I'm looking to returning my primary school with my friends again.
correct_sentence: This is my past life and I'm looking forward to returning to my primary school with my friends again.
correction: to
error_type: Preposition Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Preposition Error: According to the usage of the verb 〈returning〉, it needs to be followed by the preposition 〈to〉 to indicate the place of return, therefore 『to』 is added to complete the sentence structure.