Writing prompt: My Hero

Student essay:
My hero is my dad and he is a soldier. You may say, he is cool but I don't think so,he just is my father now. I love my father, he is my hero because he is so nice and love me.
Although he is so strict with me, that I must get a good mark. He wants me to have a good future. When he has something good to eat,he will leave it for me,although he like enjoying it.
He has deft hands and can do many things,such as some simple handmade,or paper folding and so on,I never see a man so attentive.and he often finds out ways to make my life better and spends time with me.
I love my father and he will always be my hero!

Corrected essay:
My hero is my dad, and he is a soldier. You may say he is cool but I don't think so. He is just my father now. I love my father. He is my hero because he is so nice and loves me.
Although he is so strict with me that I must get a good mark, he wants me to have a good future. When he has something good to eat, he will leave it for me, although he likes enjoying it.
He has deft hands and can do many things, such as some simple handmade crafts or paper folding, and so on. I have never seen a man so attentive, and he often finds ways to make my life better and spends time with me.
I love my father and he will always be my hero!

Error analysis:
error_sentence: My hero is my dad and he is a soldier.
correct_sentence: My hero is my dad, and he is a soldier.
correction: ,

error_sentence: You may say, he is cool
correct_sentence: You may say he is cool but I don't think so.
error: ,
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Punctuation Error: The direct quotation structure 〈You may say〉 followed by a declarative sentence does not require a comma for separation, therefore delete 〈,〉 to standardize the sentence structure.

error_sentence: but I don't think so,he just is my father now.
correct_sentence: You may say he is cool but I don't think so. He is just my father now.
error: ,he just is
correction: . He is just
error_type: Word Order Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Punctuation Error: 『You may say he is cool but I don't think so』 and 〈he just is my father now〉 contain independent subject-verb structures and can be independent sentences, therefore change 〈,〉 to 『.』 and change 〈he〉 to 『He』; ② Space Error: According to English writing conventions, the end-of-sentence punctuation mark should be followed by a space before the first word of the next sentence, therefore change 〈,he〉 to 『. He』 to conform to the convention; ③ Word Order Error: In idiomatic English expression, the adverb 〈just〉 should be placed after 〈is〉, therefore change 〈just is〉 to 『is just』 to standardize the sentence structure.

error_sentence: I love my father, he is my hero because he is so nice and love me.

correct_sentence: I love my father. He is my hero because he is so nice and loves me.

error: , he
correction: . He
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Punctuation Error: 〈I love my father〉 and 〈he is my hero because he is so nice and love me〉 contain independent subject-verb structures and can be independent sentences, therefore change 〈, he〉 to 『. He』.

error_sentence: I love my father, he is my hero because he is so nice and love me.

correct_sentence: He is my hero because he is so nice and loves me.

error: love
correction: loves
error_type: Subject-Verb Agreement Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Subject-Verb Agreement Error: The subject 〈he〉 is third-person singular and requires the third-person singular form of the verb, therefore change 〈love〉 to 『loves』 to comply with subject-verb agreement rules.

error_sentence: Although he is so strict with me, that I must get a good mark.
correct_sentence: Although he is so strict with me that I must get a good mark, he wants me to have a good future.
error: ,
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Punctuation Error: 〈that I must get a good mark〉 is a subordinate clause and cannot be directly connected to the main clause with a comma, therefore delete 〈,〉 to standardize the sentence structure.

error_sentence: Although he is so strict with me, that I must get a good mark. He wants me to have a good future.
correct_sentence: Although he is so strict with me that I must get a good mark, he wants me to have a good future.
error: . He
correction: , he
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Punctuation Error: This is a concessive adverbial clause; 〈Although...mark〉 and the main clause 〈He wants...future〉 need to be connected by a comma, therefore change 〈. He〉 to 『, he』 to standardize the sentence structure.

error_sentence: When he has something good to eat,he will leave it for me,although he like enjoying it.

correct_sentence: When he has something good to eat, he will leave it for me, although he likes enjoying it.

error: like
correction: likes
error_type: Subject-Verb Agreement Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Subject-Verb Agreement Error: The subject 〈he〉 is third-person singular and requires the third-person singular form of the verb, therefore change 〈like〉 to 『likes』 to comply with subject-verb agreement rules.

error_sentence: He has deft hands and can do many things,such as some simple handmade,or paper folding and so on,I never see a man so attentive.and he often finds out ways to make my life better and spends time with me.

correct_sentence: He has deft hands and can do many things, such as some simple handmade crafts or paper folding, and so on.
error: ,
correction: crafts
error_type: Noun Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Noun Error: The adjective 〈handmade〉 needs to be followed by a noun as its object; considering the context, it is intended to mean "handicrafts", therefore change 〈,〉 to 『crafts』 to correctly express the meaning.

error_sentence: He has deft hands and can do many things,such as some simple handmade,or paper folding and so on,I never see a man so attentive.and he often finds out ways to make my life better and spends time with me.

correct_sentence: He has deft hands and can do many things, such as some simple handmade crafts or paper folding, and so on.
correction: ,

error_sentence: He has deft hands and can do many things,such as some simple handmade,or paper folding and so on,I never see a man so attentive.and he often finds out ways to make my life better and spends time with me.

correct_sentence: He has deft hands and can do many things, such as some simple handmade crafts or paper folding, and so on. I have never seen a man so attentive, and he often finds ways to make my life better and spends time with me.

error: ,I never see
correction: . I have never seen
error_type: Verb Tense Error
error_severity: 4
error_description: ① Punctuation Error: 〈He has deft hands and can do many things,such as some simple handmade,or paper folding and so on〉 and 〈I never see a man so attentive.and he often finds out ways to make my life better and spends time with me〉 contain independent subject-verb structures and can be independent sentences, therefore change 〈,〉 to 『.』; ② Space Error: According to English writing conventions, the end-of-sentence punctuation mark should be followed by a space before the first word of the next sentence, therefore change 〈,I〉 to 『. I』 to conform to the convention; ③ Verb Tense Error: This part emphasizes an experience from the past up to the present, so the present perfect tense should be used, therefore change 〈never see〉 to 『have never seen』 to comply with grammatical rules.

error_sentence: He has deft hands and can do many things,such as some simple handmade,or paper folding and so on,I never see a man so attentive.and he often finds out ways to make my life better and spends time with me.

correct_sentence: I have never seen a man so attentive, and he often finds ways to make my life better and spends time with me.

error: attentive.and
correction: attentive, and
error_type: Punctuation Error
error_severity: 2
error_description: Punctuation Error: When the conjunction 〈and〉 connects two independent clauses, it should be preceded by a comma, therefore change 〈attentive.and〉 to 『attentive, and』 to standardize the sentence structure.

error_sentence: He has deft hands and can do many things,such as some simple handmade,or paper folding and so on,I never see a man so attentive.and he often finds out ways to make my life better and spends time with me.

correct_sentence: I have never seen a man so attentive, and he often finds ways to make my life better and spends time with me.

error: out
error_type: Word Redundancy Error
error_severity: 3
error_description: Word Redundancy: The phrase 〈find out〉 means "to discover", whereas the intended meaning here is "to devise methods", therefore delete 〈out〉 to correctly express the meaning.