Search query: sex without pain

Product: Broken Bananah: Life, Love, and Sex...Without a Penis
Relevance: Exact
A comedic memoir about sexuality, this is a journey through severe medical trauma for anyone who's been through an accident or is currently experiencing a "break". Broken Bananah is what happens when your privates go public and you've got too much time in your own head. This is about love, life, and sex...without a penis.

Getting in cabs, going to work, taking a shower... These routine activities are a lot harder to do with a catheter in my Little Richard. Why? Well, I tore two muscles in my beloved rooster and severed my urethra having casual sex. This is the funny/not-so-funny story of the accident, the recovery, and all the blood, pain, love, and philosophy in between. A score of people helped me pee, including my mother, as I shuffled around New York City tethered to a urination tube for a month. It's a story about perspective through anecdotes like cross-dressing Halloween costumes, a teenage dowry, and a copious amount of phallic references. I guess it could always be worse. We might as well laugh while we cry, masturbate until it hurts, and realize the truth is ridiculous if we're brave enough to claim it. Hopefully you want more than this short description, but, like my sex life, I've finished before you even started.

Product: Punished by the Landlord: Complete Three Book Series
Relevance: Irrelevant
"You’re nothing more than a piece of property for three days out of the month, and the toaster doesn’t tell me ‘no’ even if I want to toast an entire bag of bread."

Degradation, pain, and the most exquisite pleasure I've ever experienced is what I'll receive this weekend. Spanking, bondage, and absolutely no showers regardless of the depraved acts that I'm required to perform are just the start.
My landlord owns my body three days a month, and I don't know if it will be enough. Some would say that it's torture what he's going to do to me, but can it actually be torture if you can't wait to go back next month?
This three-book complete series contains:
Paying with Skin
Filthy and Owned
Begging the Landlord