Lost Motivation to code
Tags: coding, envy, work, discuss
Published: 2018-04-03 17:22:21

---
title: Lost Motivation to code 
published: true
description: 
tags: Coding, envy, work, discuss
---
Okay, I'm going for it. 
I've never written in a blog or anything but this time I feel like I need it since I don't know where to turn, and why I've chosen here because I've never liked that much a community until I've found dev.to (between I have the stickers and I really like). 
So my story began when I got recruited by a communication and marketing agency that  just opened in my city as an intern while still studying for my master degree in Big data and cloud computing, so first I began with creating a desktop app (with JAVA) and administrating Salesforce ( Something I've never heard ) then after 6 months I finished my intern and they proposed to stay with them as a Big Data Developer with a good salary for someone who still didn't finish study, while I was happy having my first job with a good salary and also as a Big Data developer, and also the CEO of the company told me that I'm a good piece of his company and that I'm smart and dynamic ... well, I was so happy. First I was as an administer of Salesforce and sometimes develop in it, while since when something is new for me I found it exciting and start learning it so I start learning salesforce and executing what I learn in the field well it was going well, but then I stoped learning, the company don't have many projects so we work momentarily like once in 2 months and for all the month nothing to do just taking care if any technical issues happen in the call centre, First I said well I will use all this free time to learn more about big data and try to apply something and I'm reciving my salary  it's cool I can be underpendant.Days going with no work to do in the company just taking care of the technical issues in the Call center desktops so I lost envy to code or to do anything It has nothing to do with my dream job I don't even do things in relation to code, now I feel like I'm scared of code ,it's been 7 months for me in the comapny and  without touching one letter of code, I keep reading here and articles about tech, programming, project but I can't begin or touch anything in relation . I was so good at coding (since I was the best in my class and stuff) and this wasn't important I was so happy touching code, reading it, staying nights trying to find a solution of problems, coding robots, participating in competitions well I found myself in all coding memes. Now I can't even touch a code, every time I try to begin something my mind tells me " bro you haven't code for a months you can't do things now" I lost all the  envy to code even if coding was the best thing I've learnt and I've never been this sure about what I want to study, but now I lost it and I don't have someone to talk with him about this that can understand me  (well I do with my girlfriend but she can't really understand since she has no relation with coding or anything in relation ), I'm even scared to apply for other jobs because I feel like I have nothing in my mind to sell now even if I feel lke I do but it's blocked. Well I'm not good in English or even at writing I don't know if what I wrote will be read by someone or will I receive any comments or answers but my mind told me maybe someone in this community may understand me or something. 
Thank you for reading.
(Sorry for my poor English)