Book notes: No-Nonsense Leadership
Tags: books
Published: 2020-06-24 18:50:35

---
title: Book notes: No-Nonsense Leadership
published: true
tags: books
canonical_url: https://danlebrero.com/2020/04/01/no-nonsense-leadership-summary/
description: Book notes on "No-Nonsense Leadership"
cover_image: https://danlebrero.com/images/blog/no-nonse-leadership/no-nonsense-leadership.jpg
series: Book notes
---
These are my notes on [Nadia van der Vlies](https://twitter.com/NadiavdVlies)'s [No-nonsense Leadership](https://www.amazon.com/No-Nonsense-Leadership-Become-Effective-Manager-ebook/dp/B07S8CYNNT).
 
It contains quite practical advice, but it is not software/engineering specific. 
 
Keeps the trend on other leadership books: Empower people by letting them find their own solutions.

# Key Insights

- Mature leadership:
    - High empathy, High honesty.
    - Treat others as equals.
    - Everybody can self-manage.
    - Empower people to come up with solutions.
    - Bidirectional trust.
* New behaviours are acquired by doing, doing and doing.
- To keep control, take ownership:
 
![Take ownership](https://danlebrero.com/images/blog/no-nonse-leadership/take-ownership.jpg "Taking ownership")            

- Keep sharing the mission, vision and strategy.
* You are no longer one of your (ex-)co-workers.
* Performance reviews:
    * Negative reviews should never come as a surprise.
    * Make notes through the year.
    * Would I hire this employee if they were applying for their current position?
* Give compliments regularly:
    * Stimulate culture where people speak positively about others.
    * Be specific.
* If you want your employees to feel safe, you have to show some vulnerability.
* Coaching:
    * Coaching means biting your tongue a lot.
    * A success is an attempt to change behaviour, even if the attempt failed.
    * Coachee is responsible for his personal development.
* To reflect is to learn.
* If you work hard, other wont have to.
* [Respectful confrontation](#respectful-confrontation).
* [Delivering bad news](#bad-news).
           
# TOC

* [1 - No-Nonsense Leadership](#ch-1)
* [2 - Leadership Skills](#ch-2)
* [3 - Leader, Manager, Coach](#ch-3)
* [4 - Leader](#ch-4)
* [5 - Manager](#ch-5)
* [6 - Coach](#ch-6)
* [7 - Reflexes](#ch-7)
* [8 - Tricky Situations](#ch-8)
* [9 - The truism of no-nonsense leadership](#ch-9)

# <a name="ch-1"></a>Chapter 1 - No-Nonsense Leadership

- Mature model based on [Transactional Analysis](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transactional_analysis).
- Mature:
    - Treat others as equals.
    - Everybody is a responsible human being.
    - Everybody can self-manage.
    - Coaching leadership style.
    - Empower people to come up with solutions.
    - Honest.
    - Conscious and considerate choice.
    - Bidirectional trust.
- You need:
    - Empathy.
    - Honesty.
- Pitfalls:
    - Mother:
        - High empathy. Low Honesty.
        - Always eager to help.
        - Effects:
            - Takes away responsibility, hence opportunity to grow.
            - Leader become overworked.
    - Macho:
        - Low empathy. High Honesty.
        - I know better attitude. Judgemental.
        - Effects:
            - Obedient or rebel employees.
            - Takes away responsibility, hence opportunity to grow.
    - Mole:
        - Low empathy. Low Honesty.
        - Avoids confronting issues.
        - Effects:
            - Nothing is improved.
- Pitfalls are not pitfalls if you consciously chose them and don’t use them often.

## <a name="ch-2"></a>Chapter 2 - Leadership Skills

* Situational leadership:
    * Use a different kind of leadership depending on employee task maturity.
    * Task Maturity:
        * Willingness to do the task.
        * Ability to perform it.
        * Levels M1 to M6:
            * M1: Loads of detailed instructions.
            * M2: Still lots of instructions, but also explain the why.
            * M3: Focus on person, not task.
        * How to asses task maturity? Ask employee.
        
![Situational leadership. Task Maturity](https://danlebrero.com/images/blog/no-nonse-leadership/task-maturity.jpg "Situational leadership. Task maturity.")            

* Taking ownership:
    * Keep your values in mind.
    * When things do not go as expected, to keep control you have to:

![Take ownership](https://danlebrero.com/images/blog/no-nonse-leadership/take-ownership.jpg "Taking ownership")            

* Conversations:
    * Keep three perspectives: yours, the others, that of an objective observer.
    * Active listening:
        * Listen.
        * Recap:
            * Use your own words unless is a delicate matter.
            * Content and feelings.
        * Keep asking questions.
        * Tolerate silences.
    * Stay in control:
        * Commit: set the goal.
        * Monitor: check if the talking is relevant.
        * Off topic: draw attention and ask if it is relevant.
        * Difficult interaction: draw attention and ask why.
        * Two tracks: commit again.
                
## <a name="ch-3"></a>Chapter 3 - Leader, Manager, Coach

* You are no longer one of your (ex-)co-workers.
* Leader before Manager or Coach.
  
## <a name="ch-4"></a>Chapter 4 - Leader

* Enthusiastic, authentic.
* Keep sharing the mission, vision and strategy.
* Know and learn company values.
* Motivate and inspire:
    * Share conclusions *and reasoning*.
    * Show appreciation.
    * Repeat yourself.
    * Connect.

## <a name="ch-5"></a>Chapter 5 - Manager

* Translates Vision to Goals:
    * Employee translates goals to solutions.
    * Let employees have a say on their goals to create greater commitment.
* Monitor and review results and behaviours:
    * <a name="respectful-confrontation"></a>Respectful confrontation:
        * Step 0: reflect if it is you or the employee.
        * Step 1: Expose facts and only facts.
            * Use first person.
            * No judgement.
            * Be very specific.
        * Step 2: The effect it causes.
            * I think + I feel + I act.
        * Step 3: Ask "Is this something you recognize?"
        * Step 4: Explain your request/desire.
        * This is the kick-off for a conversation.
        * Dealing with responses:
            * Reflect on feeling.
            * Explain.
            * Guess underlying need.
            * Express your need.
            * Make your request/proposal.
* Asses and adjust:
    * Performance review:
        * Your employee is never your equal.
        * Demotivating for others if poor performing coworkers get same pay raises.
        * Make notes through the year.
        * Would I hire this employee if they were applying for their current position?
        * SMART goals.
        * Start with the good things.
        * Negative reviews should never come as a surprise.
        * Ask for feedback on the assessment.
    * Give compliments regularly:
        * Stimulate culture where people speak positively about others.
        * Honest.
        * Specific.
        * Do not delay it.
    * <a name="bad-news"></a>Delivering bad news:
        1. Deliver the blow:
            * Go straight to the bad news.
            * Give one or two reasons.
        2. Manage the reaction:
            * Be understanding. Do not justify yourself.
            * Give space. Do not fill silences.
        3. Solution, explanation, follow up appointment:
            * Wait for the employee to be ready. When she starts asking "why" or "what now"
            * Reiterate reasons.
            * Maybe follow up with another meeting.

## <a name="ch-6"></a>Chapter 6 - Coach

* Coaching as a manager is more difficult as you already expect something from your employee.
* Do not give tips or advice.
* Coachee comes with their own problems and solutions.
* Coachee is responsible for his personal development.
* Accept what it is, without judging. Emphatic.
* Pitfalls:
    * Comparing and going one worse.
    * Educating and giving advice.
    * Playing down the problem.
    * Interrogating.
    * Psychoanalyzing.
    * Join in and making it worse.
* Walk ins with no clear question or need:
    * Respectful interrogation.
    * Emotion reflection.
    * What do you want from me? What is your question?
    * Commit: on condition, now, later, never.
* Coaching without a coaching goal is pointless.
* Marteen Kouwenhoven coaching matrix 4 doors:
    1. Thought door: get the facts.
    2. Emotions door: why is this a problem to be solved?
    2. Needs door: 
        * Positive opposite of emotions door.
        * Cannot be about others changing.
    3. Actions door:
        * Coachee should find her own solutions.
* Coaching means biting your tongue a lot.
* Celebrate success:
    * Start coaching session by talking about successes.
    * A success is an attempt to change behaviour, even if the attempt failed.
* Growth mindset:
    * Learning about fixed vs growth can get you out of the fixed mindset.
* If you want your employees to feel safe, you have to show some vulnerability.
 
## <a name="ch-7"></a>Chapter 7 - Reflexes

* Beliefs that get on your way to do what you have to do.
* "Survival" strategies.

## <a name="ch-8"></a>Chapter 8 - Tricky Situations

* Passive employee, defiant employee, moaning employee, ...
    * Respectful confrontation
* Top performing employee:
    * Sincere and explicit compliments.
    * Not everyone wants to develop further.
    * Check regularly so they dont get bored.
* Quarreling employees:
    * Employee should state exactly what she expects from you. This makes her responsible for the solution.
    * Employees should settle it themselves.
    * Make sure employees responsibilities are well defined.
    
## <a name="ch-9"></a>Bonus 1 - The truism of no-nonsense leadership

* To reflect is to learn.
* The answer to most questions is "lets talk about it"
* If you have something to say, say it. If you have something to ask, ask it.
* If you work hard, other wont have to.
* New behaviours are acquired by doing, doing and doing.