Call to Developers: Know when to say no or quit… btw, is ok to say no.
Tags: leadership, developer, mentalhealth
Published: 2023-05-03 00:32:01

This is not a technical article, but it can save you an amount of time, and time is one of the most important things that we need in our life.

Most of the details in this article are based on my previous experience as a developer in companies.

When we start in a new company we always want to show our talent and what we are capable of, and that’s the idea to grow as professionals in the new company, right? But as time passed we notice the amount of work increases a lot and we don’t know how to say no. This was my case for several years, and I always wanted to accomplish the objectives ASAP, but by the end of the day, I was completely mentally destroyed and exhausted.

Surprise, I learned to say no, and I want to share this with you, but just in case I’m not saying to do not work, you have to, and is your responsibility to deliver results, I’m saying that you can set boundaries for yourself. But, how can I set these boundaries and realize when is required to say no?

-  **_Manage your time:_**

When you are starting in a new position is complicated to see how many meetings or the time of development you will invest, but with the passing of the weeks or months, you will see what are the key meetings to attend and how you can estimate the development.

> “Time stays long enough for those who use it…“ — Leonardo da Vinci

You can track the amount of time that the meetings or development of coding is taking, by doing that, you will order the priorities of your day and skip some meetings that can be an email.

- **_Know the business_**

Is really hard when you are in a new position to understand the business and the logic inside of the application on the first day, but this is part of the onboarding sessions(If you have one), you have to learn the main concepts of this, and with the pass of the time, this will help you to have a better perspective of the real estimation for the user stories and set the priorities for the team and business, as everyone knows, for the business everything is urgent.

> “When Everything Is Urgent, Nothing Really Is…”

Keep in mind this matrix, I hope will help you to identify priorities


![Matrix](https://dev-to-uploads.s3.amazonaws.com/uploads/articles/16jlxk7mwqyyhpyx6kkx.png)

- **_Your work is your priority, but not your life_**

Understand this cost me years, do you want to do the same? I don’t think so. I invested hours working to deliver results beyond expectations, and the only reward that I received was “thanks for your hard work”, and my physical and mental health was at risk, besides, I put first my work before my family and friends, and I forgot that the ones that will be with me in difficult time will not be my work, will be my family or friends.

When work is taking the first position in your life, you have to understand this will have heavy consequences in your personal life, I’m not saying to be a regular employee and not go beyond expectations, you can do it and go for it, but you have to balance your work with your life.

> “Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance and order and rhythm and harmony.”

Of course, if your work environment is not good and your leader only wants to take the best of you without care for you, you have to take into consideration to find other options, but if you are right now in a company that knows the importance of work/life balance they will understand when you rise the flag about how you feel and you want to reorder the priorities.

- **_Learn about mental health_**

As a leader of a team is hard to see when we are not in good shape mentally, as we are only focused to deliver results and accomplish the objectives of the team, but if you invest some time to know and understand the importance of mental health, the above topics will be easy for you to implement.

> “Mental health is just as important as… physical health and deserves the same quality of support.” — Kate Middleton

As my doctor mentioned to me: “ Your brain needs to have the same quality as your other organs”, that phrase helped me to see mental health from another perspective. When I started to take care of my mental health my performance at work increased and can found the balance in so many things. I encourage you to learn about this and remember all your body needs to be in good shape and your performance or any objective in your life will be achieved.

**Conclusion:**

With the topics mentioned, you will figure out when to say NO, because is not a magic recipe or a step-by-step, it’s more than knowing yourself and your team and understanding the importance of having a good work environment. As you saw, if you manage your time, know the business, know the priorities, and know about mental health, you will prevent any possible disaster in your life and team environment.

Remember, always show the best of you, but not your life.