English: A constituent wrote to me, to five other AMs and to the Health, Social Care and Sport Committee with quite serious concerns about the Talk to Me national conference. I've had messages this morning from constituents, messages this afternoon, a phone call at around 8:00 this morning to discuss the report. Constituents do feel let down by the report. They do not feel that a vulnerable group of men were fully engaged with as they should have been. I'm here speaking on behalf of those people today, and many hidden victims. Every time I've been to a support group meeting - such as Both Parents Matter, for example - I have met people who either have been suicidal or are in fact suicidal, and I recommend that the committee maybe go to such support group meetings and meet with people there. Hidden domestic abuse of men is a factor in the epidemic of male suicide. As we heard, in 2017, 278 men took their own lives - five a week, almost one a day. As mentioned, it is a staggering statistic, and something must be done when we hear that suicide is the biggest cause of death in men between 20 and 49 years of age. There is a hidden form of domestic abuse that is permitted in society, and it is that of parental alienation. Many men who come into my office are suffering from emotional abuse and coercive control. Children are used as weapons, and everybody loses. In south Wales, the police refuse to accept such abuse as abuse, and that's a scandal. What saddens me also - and I say this as a man - is that I see an increasing percentage of mothers facing the same abuse. Justice Wall, in 2003, said that 'parental alienation is a well-recognised phenomenon.' Well, it should be in the report. I'm going to read a quote from a man in a lot of pain, a father. And he said: 'Quite simply, severing a relationship between a parent and child is, short of taking somebody's life, the worst thing one human being can do to another'. The culture of false allegations, sometimes to get legal aid in the family court arena, is also a killer. I'll read another quote, off another real person: 'I had my children taken away from me, then 42 allegations were made against me. Suicide seemed the best option. Twice I tried to hang myself, and once I stood on a railway track and the Samaritans talked me off the track'. Men are criticised for not engaging and not talking about how they feel, but when you are in the family court system, you cannot talk about any suicidal feelings, any emotional turmoil, because that will be used against you to prevent you from seeing your children. And I look forward to the day when criminal justice is dealt with by Wales in a completely different way, especially in the family arena. In this city, in our capital city of Wales, there is no non-judgmental support for men. Men are always treated as perpetrators, and they are screened. I want to quote a friend of Alex Skeel, a very brave man who took part in a BBC documentary. He was abused by Jordan Worth, the first female to be jailed for coercive control, and he said: 'It doesn't matter what gender they are. A victim is still a victim. An abuser is still an abuser. A victim still hurts whether they are male or female. An abuser is just as nasty whether they are male or female.' I get messages from people saying that there is nowhere for them to go - and I will wind up now -
Welsh: Ysgrifennodd etholwr ataf, at bump o ACau eraill ac at y Pwyllgor Iechyd, Gofal Cymdeithasol a Chwaraeon yn mynegi pryderon go ddifrifol ynglŷn â chynhadledd genedlaethol Beth am Siarad â Fi? Cefais negeseuon y bore yma gan etholwyr, negeseuon y prynhawn yma, galwad ffôn am tua 8:00 y bore yma i drafod yr adroddiad. Mae etholwyr wedi'u siomi gan yr adroddiad. Nid oeddent yn teimlo bod grŵp agored i niwed o ddynion wedi cael cymryd rhan mor llawn ag y dylent. Rwyf yma i siarad ar ran y bobl hynny heddiw, a llawer o ddioddefwyr cudd. Bob tro y bûm mewn cyfarfod o grŵp cymorth - fel Both Parents Matter, er enghraifft - rwyf wedi cyfarfod â phobl sydd naill ai wedi teimlo'n hunanladdol neu sy'n hunanladdol, ac rwy'n argymell bod y pwyllgor yn mynd i gyfarfodydd grwpiau cymorth o'r fath ac yn cyfarfod â'r bobl yno. Mae cam-drin domestig cudd yn erbyn dynion yn ffactor yn yr epidemig o hunanladdiad ymhlith dynion. Fel y clywsom, yn 2017, cyflawnodd 278 o ddynion hunanladdiad - pump yr wythnos, bron un y dydd. Fel y soniwyd, mae'n ystadegyn syfrdanol, a rhaid gwneud rhywbeth pan glywn mai hunanladdiad yw'r achos marwolaeth mwyaf mewn dynion rhwng 20 a 49 oed. Mae yna ffurf gudd ar gam-drin domestig a ganiateir mewn cymdeithas, sef dieithrio plentyn oddi wrth riant. Mae llawer o ddynion sy'n dod i fy swyddfa yn dioddef yn sgil cam-drin emosiynol a rheolaeth drwy orfodaeth. Defnyddir plant fel arfau, ac mae pawb ar eu colled. Yn ne Cymru, mae'r heddlu'n gwrthod derbyn cam-drin o'r fath fel cam-drin, ac mae hynny'n sgandal. Yr hyn sy'n fy nhristáu hefyd - ac rwy'n dweud hyn fel dyn - yw fy mod yn gweld canran gynyddol o famau'n wynebu'r un math o gam-drin. Yn 2003, roedd Justice Wall yn dweud bod dieithrio plentyn oddi wrth riant yn ffenomenon gyfarwydd iawn. Wel, dylai fod yn yr adroddiad. Rwy'n mynd i ddarllen dyfyniad gan ddyn mewn llawer o boen, rhywun sy'n dad. Ac roedd yn dweud: 'Yn syml iawn, torri'r berthynas rhwng rhiant a phlentyn, ar wahân i ladd rhywun, yw'r peth gwaethaf y gall un bod dynol ei wneud i un arall'. Mae diwylliant o honiadau ffug, weithiau i gael cymorth cyfreithiol yn y llysoedd teulu, hefyd yn lladdwr. Fe ddarllenaf ddyfyniad arall, gan berson go iawn arall: 'Cymerwyd fy mhlant oddi wrthyf, yna gwnaed 42 o honiadau yn fy erbyn. Roedd hi'n ymddangos mai hunanladdiad oedd yr opsiwn gorau. Ceisiais grogi fy hun ddwy waith, a sefais ar drac rheilffordd unwaith ac fe lwyddodd y Samariaid i fy nghymell oddi ar y rheilffordd drwy siarad â mi'. Caiff dynion eu beirniadu am beidio ymgysylltu a siarad ynglŷn â sut maent yn teimlo, ond pan fyddwch yn y system llysoedd teulu, ni allwch siarad am unrhyw deimladau hunanladdol, unrhyw gythrwfl emosiynol, oherwydd defnyddir hynny yn eich erbyn i'ch rhwystro rhag gweld eich plant. Ac rwy'n edrych ymlaen at y diwrnod pan fydd cyfiawnder troseddol yn cael ei wneud mewn ffordd gwbl wahanol yng Nghymru, yn enwedig ym maes cyfraith teulu. Yn y ddinas hon, ym mhrifddinas Cymru, nid oes unrhyw gymorth anfeirniadol ar gyfer dynion. Caiff dynion eu trin fel troseddwyr bob amser, a chânt eu sgrinio. Rwyf am ddyfynnu cyfaill i Alex Skeel, dyn dewr iawn a gymerodd ran mewn rhaglen ddogfen ar y BBC. Cafodd ei gam-drin gan Jordan Worth, y fenyw gyntaf i gael ei charcharu am reolaeth drwy orfodaeth, a dywedodd: Nid oes ots pa ryw ydynt. Mae dioddefwr yn dal i fod yn ddioddefwr. Mae camdriniwr yn dal i fod yn gamdriniwr. Mae dioddefwr yn dal i frifo boed yn wryw neu'n fenyw. Mae camdriniwr yr un mor gas boed yn ddyn neu'n ddynes. Caf negeseuon gan bobl yn dweud nad oes unman iddynt fynd - ac fe ddof i ben yn awr -