FUI SEQUESTRADA!
Autor: Indira  Costa | Publicado: 2013-02-27T19:13:00-03:00


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Hoje ouvi alguém dizer:&nbsp; 

_Acho melhor se calar,
afinal sei muito sobre a sua vida.

Calar-me? Como? Eu queria mais era gritar! Meus olhos brilharam! 

Ele realmente sabia muito
sobre minha vida? Que notícia boa! Finalmente, eu era reconhecida?

Por um momento me senti uma
estranha! E se tivesse realmente algo pra dizer a meu respeito do qual eu
precisava temer, era melhor que chamasse a polícia! Que tipo de história eu
ocultava de mim mesmo? Seria eu uma ameaça à humanidade? Ou seria então alguém
capaz de envergonhar-me a mim própria? Eu quis saber! Eu quis mesmo que se
rasgasse em “denúncias”. Que parte da minha vida deixei escapar a um “estranho”
sem ter antes me contado? Quanta injustiça!

Por um instante vasculhei a
memória pra ver se encontrava alguma aranha esquecida entre as teias.

Infeliz constatação! O indivíduo
sabia muito mais da minha vida do que eu mesma. Não havia nada lá! Nada além
das minhas imperfeições. Nada mais, além dos medos, dos sonhos, das
cicatrizes... Não havia NADA ALÉM DA MINHA CONDIÇÃO HUMANA!

Acostumara-me a acreditar na
mudança. A esperar para além das falhas. Acostumara a me aceitar, a me perdoar
e a me reconstruir dia-a-dia, e já não me permitia a identidade do ontem. Essa
identidade que me escapa entre os ponteiros do relógio.

&nbsp;Mas agora estava ali,
travando uma guerra comigo mesma, punindo-me por algo que simplesmente eu
desconhecia.

Quanto me indignei em pensar
que a vida ao qual ele se referia não tinha um lugar em mim. Ela estava completamente fora,&nbsp; alheia ao meu olhar! Estava provavelmente permeada em outras
vidas. E como eu desejei saber quem eu era naquele instante!

Mas o silêncio que deveria
me cercear, calou justamente aquele que me ameaçara. Quanta presunção! Intimidar
alguém de si mesmo! Essa é realmente uma estratégia algoz... Ele me feriu
profundamente com aquele silêncio, poupando-me de quem sou. Quanta
crueldade!&nbsp; Colocou entre eu e mim um véu
obscuro. Eu que lutara a tanto custo para reconciliar os meus eus, agora já não
sabia quantos pronomes abrigava em minha identidade. Eu que ainda não tivera a
ousadia de me dizer:

_ Eu sei muito sobre a sua
vida!

Agora, havia encontrado
alguém que dizia isso! E parecia se deliciar em saber! Definitivamente, não era
justo! Ele que acabava de se constituir sequestrador, furtando um dos mais
valiosos bens que despossuo: eu mesma! 

Com que direito?