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Autor: Adriana Sydor | Publicado: 2015-02-03T23:51:00-02:00


queria estar na praia agora. quieta, sozinha,
ouvindo arrebentar de ondas e chacoalhar de coqueiros.

para troca, somente um incrível, imenso,
intenso silêncio. desses que a gente só entrega para o mar e pronto. oferenda
sem volta e sem pedido.



os dias de doença me deixaram doente. o corpo
provou ser mais e levou à nocaute qualquer pensamento melhor. 

acho que chega um dia em que a gente se
rende, se entrega, pula no poço e despedaça ali qualquer vontade.



mas o mundo é maior. e há gente. gente de
todo tipo, que amamos, que nos amam, que nos querem, que queremos bem. gente
que exige força, determinação, bom humor, atenção. gente que nos escolheu como
representante do discurso do guerreiro e não aceita nenhuma fraquejada. perder
o vigor vira uma ofensa ao alheio. não há direito de ser menor. 



eu canso quando me sinto o cara do circo que
roda os pratos. eu me apavoro quando percebo que não sou ele. eu não sei qual é
o meu lugar no mundo. eu não tenho lugar no mundo, e por isso queria ficar
quieta. sem pratos. 

cem pratos é o que tenho e vou em frente.
expectativas contrariadas. 



sou escrava da narrativa que construí e por
isso sigo, um passo depois do outro, mil piadas, sorriso estampado, confusões
cíclicas. 

retorno, saída, mudança? não. só esse
afogamento em linhas tortas do que me apavora e me pesa os ombros. &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
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por isso gosto do mar, diante dele não sou
nada, jamais serei nada, e nem preciso ter todos os sonhos do mundo.