Você não é a sua essência. Você é suas atitudes.
Autor: Marcelo Maron | Publicado: 2013-04-15T12:46:00-03:00

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<!--StartFragment-->



Raramente vejo filmes policiais. Tenho a nítida
sensação de estar perdendo tempo com algo que nada me acrescenta, a não ser
ficar ansioso. Neste domingo, no meu papel de pai, fui escalado
compulsoriamente para uma dessas sessões cheias de tiros e muita destruição.



Numa das raras cenas de calmaria, me deparei com a
seguinte colocação que me chamou a atenção: “você não é o que é por dentro; é o
que você faz que define você”. Voltei a cena algumas vezes, pois fiquei tocado
com aquilo, embora o contexto do filme não coincidia com o que me despertou a
atenção.



Comecei a viajar com aquelas palavras, e me
surpreendi de como elas se encaixam bem no nosso cotidiano, seja na vida
pessoal ou profissional, ou no convívio familiar, com os amigos, colegas e até
com meros desconhecidos que cruzam o nosso caminho todos os dias.



É difícil que alguém se julgue uma má pessoa, mesmo
que ela realmente seja. Até porque, o pior dos seres tem sempre algum momento
de bondade, seja com um filho, com a mãe, ou a namorada. Pergunto-me então por
qual motivo que pessoas boas tomam atitudes tão detestáveis quando convivem com
outras. Por que será que o ser humano precisa de tantas máscaras para se
relacionar com outras pessoas? Será que se fôssemos um pouco mais “iguais”,
mais padronizados no nosso comportamento ao se relacionar com pessoas, não
poderíamos criar uma atmosfera de mais sinceridade, honestidade e
transparência, tirando assim um melhor proveito dos convívios humanos? Não se
evitaria assim, muitas vezes, fazer da vida dos outros um verdadeiro inferno?



Vamos a um exemplo prático. Há alguns anos, bem no
início da minha carreira, estava no trabalho, em reunião com meu então
superior, um gerente carrancudo, temido e mal humorado, e mais três colegas,
todos sentados numa pequena mesa de reunião. Num dado momento, entraram na sala
duas mulheres, uma mais velha e outra mais jovem, de mais ou menos uns 25 anos.
Ficamos sabendo que se tratavam da esposa e da filha mais nova do tal gerente.
Ao vê-las entrar, ele se levantou e, parecendo ter esquecido que estávamos ali,
beijou a esposa e deu um abraço na filha com um carinho que eu jamais esqueci.
Ele nos apresentou, e ficaram conversando um pouco, até que se despediram e
deixaram a sala. Retomamos a reunião como se nada tivesse acontecido. Na hora
do almoço, um dos colegas que estava comigo na sala, me disse: não imaginava
que aquele cara arrogante, que trata tão mal as pessoas, poderia ter uma atitude
afetuosa e humana com alguém!



De fato, a imagem que tínhamos daquele senhor
detestável não se encaixava na cena de profundo amor paterno que presenciamos.
Para a família daquele sujeito, ele era um homem bom e amoroso. Por que, então,
não poderia estender este tratamento, no mínimo mais cordial, para com os
colegas de trabalho? Voltando à frase do filme policial, aquele homem não era
visto pelos outros pelo que ele era, mas pela forma como se comportava.
Portanto, para que sejamos vistos como somos, precisamos nos comportar também
da forma que somos.



Seria possível que a situação fosse inversa, ou
seja, que aquele homem fosse mesmo ruim, mas se comportava bem apenas diante da
família? Talvez, mas esta forma de contar a história não me convence muito,
possivelmente pela minha insistência de querer acreditar na bondade humana. É
como a luz que acaba com a escuridão, mas a escuridão não se sustenta diante de
um facho de luz.



É possível também que haja dois lados numa única
pessoa: um bom e um ruim. Com as pessoas com quem não há laços afetivos, o lado
ruim poderia preponderar. É lamentável, mas é o que mais vemos por aí:
falsidades, intolerância, preconceito, arrogância. Pessoas assim, acabam com o
que resta da reputação do ser humano, e tornam o mundo um lugar bem pior para
se viver.




<!--EndFragment-->