Apaixonando-se por mim.
Autor: =) | Publicado: 2011-08-02T06:58:00-07:00

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 <![endif]-->  Os últimos anos foram pra mim uma imersão verdadeira no passado. Fatos que iam e vinham de minha mente, e quando estavam um pouco longe, eu buscava-os para me sentir um pouco mais amparada pela sombra de algo que existiu. Isso me protegia da aparente solidão, o fato de já ter vivido amores intensos, experiências alucinantes era por mim usado como máscara para uma dor, ou aparente analgésico. Afinal, em minha sã consciência pensar e "sofrer" por um alguém eram melhores do que não pensar em ninguém, e nunca ter tido o prazer dessa vivência.
Acontece que a vida me ensinou de maneira árdua que eu posso ser só (pela visão de independência e amorosamente falando), que posso passar por um longo período de transição.
Eu não preciso sempre ter alguém do meu lado para me mostrar o quanto a vida é bela. Eu não preciso da&nbsp; visão de outra pessoa para enxergar a real cor das flores.
Por que o amor está dentro de mim, está nas coisas que faço por prazer simples. Dar um sorriso ao um estranho, passar um domingo tomando sorvete com minha mãe, paparicar o meu sobrinho...
É tão nítido, queria ter encontrado essa fórmula dentro de mim antes. Principalmente por não agüentar mais a minha automutilação da alma, por achar que a felicidade só podia fazer parte de mim se fosse proporcionada por outrem.
Hoje posso compreender que ninguém pode amar alguém se não se amar em primeiro lugar. O amor próprio é o que torna você uma pessoa interessante, é preciso você estar bem consigo mesmo para que o outro se sinta bem ao seu lado.
Aos poucos vou sorrindo de mim, vou me conhecendo, vou me agradando. E até hoje das pessoas a quem me dediquei, eu tenho me dado a maior recompensa. O amor está em todos os lugares, e não apenas nas imagens que costumeiramente projetamos.