Autor: Carol Lago | Publicado: 2012-11-07T23:41:00-03:00

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Voltou a chover aqui na cidade. A noite ficou de um cinza
penetrante. Lembrei de nós dois deitados na rede cantando aquela da legião “veja
o sol dessa manhã tão cinza, a tempestade que chega é da cor dos teus olhos,
castanhos...” E de repente eu me vi tão perdida, tão aflita em querer ver teus
olhos castanhos que uma lagrima pulou da minha pupila.

&nbsp;A pior sensação do
mundo é você sentir saudade do que já não pode ter. Pensei em te ligar e ficar
em silencio. Pensei em andar na porra da chuva até a sua casa. Pensei em me
jogar do alto do sétimo andar. 

Andei lendo Gábito Nunes demais. Escutei los hermanos a semana inteira. Concordei demais com o Renato. Afundei-me com o Caio. Cheguei a me
sentir meio Clarisse... E tudo isso só me fez perceber o quanto eu to me
sentindo sozinha e o quanto só você me faz falta. 

Não preciso de outro amor, preciso do ‘nosso’ amor que
começou naquela singela fila do pão. E se estendeu pelas cafeterias em bairros boêmios
a fora. A xícara velha do cappuccino. O disco do Oasis na escrivaninha. Os
envelopes de cartas que eu escrevi e nunca te dei. 

Queria saber se você ainda olha alguma coisa que tenha algum
vestígio de corujas e pensa em mim. Ou se ainda recusa-se a comer sushi
nas sextas-feiras. Por outro lado, eu sei que você sabe que eu morro de saudade
da tua barba roçando no meu pescoço e do teu entrelaçar de braços em volta do
meu corpo magro. Mas nada me faz mais falta que o teu cheiro de homem exalando
na minha cama. 

Ah meu bem, a gente ria tanto desses nossos desencontros e
olha só agora? Nem sei onde fomos parar, só sei que bem longe um do outro. 

Hoje eu chorei sozinha, amanha provavelmente chorarei de
novo. Porque falta é isso, é dor até nos ossos. É querer ir em frente e ficar
estagnado no mesmo lugar. Eu permaneci aqui, inerte. Tentando achar alguém que
seja mais sentimental que eu...