Resolutions
Autor: Flávia Aguiar | Publicado: 2012-12-29T20:23:00-02:00

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- Hey

-Hi

- What r u doin here? I mean…I`m glad to see u
but still…kind of surprised.

- I don`t know…I guess…Not sure… Ok, I`m lying.
I do know.

-So…?

- I`m here cuz a new year is about to begin and
I figure it out I`ve a lot of unsaid stuff. And then…I decided I`m done with
that. I wanna a clean slate, you know. A new fresh year by fact. 

- What you mean?

- What I mean? I think you know what I mean,
Peter. I wanna say something. I`m here to demand you an answer doesn`t matter
which. A hello or a goodbye.&nbsp; Pick
one.&nbsp; So be it. And please, don`t pretend
you don`t know what I`m talking about. It`d just make things even harder. I
won`t go home without my answer, Pete.

- I never really intend to say goodbye to you.

- But that`s all you keep telling me. You push
me when you`re supposed to pull. And then, you pull me when it`s time to push.
And also…you never really used words, right? It`s always that looks of yours
that I`m supposed to get everything you`re saying just by looking at them.
Well…Guess what? I don`t.&nbsp; I suck at
reading them. Also…I suck at reading these signs of yours. You drive me crazy.
You still driving me crazy. I just don`t know if that`s a good thing anymore.

- So what am I? The wrong person in the wrong
time or just the right person in the wrong time?

- Neither. You are just the person that fucks
off with all my plans.

- And then…What`s your plan now?

- That`s the thing…I don`t have any. This
moment was not part of my plan. I was supposed to move on. Just like you did.
But I…

- I haven`t moved on.

- You keep coming and going...Like a wave. And
then you drag my feelings away with you. You drag away all of my choices and
plans, all my free will. You keep letting me go, you know.

-That`s good…I mean…see things from your
perspective. 

- Yeah, Peter. It kind of sucks to have to come
up with all your lines in my imaginary dialogs with you. You are
unreadable.&nbsp; 

- And
even with all these miss-match…I guess you know by now that we will meet again
somehow.

- Ohh
really? Because I really rather not to. I`m done waiting for you.&nbsp; Yeahh. It`s kind of humiliating but deeply
down I`ve always waited for you... Waited for you to grow up. Waited for you to
be the man I deserve. Waited for you to realize I`m the one.&nbsp; And now…How can I begin again? How can I do
all those different stuffs when you were in all the things I picture for my
future? In all my firsts…

- Baby…

-What you want from me, Peter? Simple
question.

- You wanna words, right?

- Yeah, no more subjective
things. A little bit of black and white, please. You can pick a coma or the
period. No more reticence in
this relationship.

- I`m not ready to move on. I`m not ready
if moving on means to let you go once again. I rather be stuck in the past if
by past you mean that I can have my memories to remain to hear your voice, to
see your face. And also, that I can have you.&nbsp;
So…no more pushes and pulls…No more mis-match. I guess you are a guest
now.

- Ohh really? Well, guess what? I`m not
asking you to let me in, to be the guest. It`s the main character or nothing. I
won`t be the supporting actor. Not anymore.

- Oh, please. Shut up. Stop twisting every
single thing I say. You want a statement, right? So here it`s one: I love you,
Ems. So no, that won`t be a period any time soon. Because doesn`t matter how
crazy and twisted our relationship might be, we`re so meant to be.

- I hate you.&nbsp; Because it could have been so much easier and…