No bar do cais
Autor: Luizinho | Publicado: 2013-01-29T23:11:00-02:00

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Tenho um
amigo chamado Jim. Chame-o direito. “Djimm”, articulando bem o “M”.



-Jim não é
um apelido em português, você sabe. – Ele me avisa. Não me informa. Avisa.



-Eu sei,
Jim. Me desculpe. Toda vez que eu falo palavras inglesas as pessoas acham que
eu sou metido a besta.



-Elas têm
razão. Mas não por você falar certo. Você é um idiota por muitas outras razões.



-Tenho
consciência disso, Jim. 



Jim é uma
Drag Queen de 2,03 metros de altura, negra e musculosa, que acha que todas as
pessoas no mundo querem o seu corpo.



-Eu sei que
você quer me comer, Biondi, mas infelizmente, infelizmente PARA VOCÊ, isso não
vai acontecer.



Prefiro não
dizer nada. Não adiantaria negar. Jim sempre acha que tem razão, mesmo quando o
que ele diz não faz o menor sentido.



-Vou pegar
uma cerveja, você quer uma?



-Eu não vou
te dar.



-Pelo amor
do bom deus, Jim, eu sou apenas seu amigo e perguntei se você quer uma cerveja!



-Escuta
aqui, Biondi, eu não sou seu amigo, mas ouça-me pelo menos uma vez nessa vida!
Essa sua delicadeza, essa prestatividade exagerada e sensibilidade não vão te
levar a lugar nenhum. Você é só um paulista branquelo metido a besta. Você é
uma boa pessoa. Mas é um idiota.



-A vida anda
dura, Jim.



-É por isso
que eu gosto dela, Biondi.



E então fui
conversar com a loirinha com saia rosa e relógio dourado na mesa do canto.