Autor: Cristiane Maciel | Publicado: 2013-02-16T03:06:00-02:00


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O que fazem
ali. Seus corpos expressam pensamentos contraídos e contrariados, e suas
expressões gritantes com suas rugas em seus rostos jovens trazem confusão, mas
não se grita senão nas expressões. &nbsp;Assim
eu vira aquele casal hipoteticamente tão descontraído naquela ­­­­­ quarta
feira de sol frio. Era o começo do outono, e eu , encostada na sabedoria da
minha arvore centenária preferida da cidade, me perdia na contradição do casal,
nas folhas jogadas ao chão e na extravagância dos meus pensares.

Já não sabera
por onde continuar,sim o casal. Suas palavras dizem melosidades
que não se encontram em qualquer olhar, não sentira energia nenhuma sequer. O
que pra mim fazem ali, tentam se consolar mutuamente pela falta de um
sentimento que os estremeça de fato. Na ansea de que talvez uma tarde de sol
frio possa acalora-los, talvez. &nbsp;Suas mãos
acariciam enquando seus olhos divagam e parece simplismente não fazerem ideia
de onde e com quem estao.

Olho ao meu
redor na busca de decifrar o que realmente estamos fazendo ali, quem de nós
seria capaz de se prender no presente e fazer, sentir ou presenciar algo que
fosse completamente fatídico. Bom, me volto para minhas folhas, por que as
pessoas e os pensamentos me cansam e me confundem, fico com as folhas, da
natureza e sua parte tecnicamente desfalecida ao me reter. Quisera eu
transformar uma fotografia completa e feliz em um cenário pleno &nbsp;de morte. Morte da realidade, da presença, a falência
da própria natureza.

Seria eu a
morrer ali, seria partes do meu quebra-cabeça que partira de mim. &nbsp;Voltava-me pro meu caderno tão envelhecido e
viajado, tão hippie onde escrevera coisas tão confusas que jamais ousara
publicar nem ao meu amigo mais próximo, que por hora, não havia a quem entregar
essa denominação.

Me atenho
finalmente na minha arvore. Sentira sua energia, sua vida inabalável, quantas
tardes de sol frio e quantos outonos e invernos haveria passado meu querido
amuleto do saber. Então, esparramada pelo cansaço da minha ignorância do mundo,
do universo, de mim e daquele parque, um pequeno cenário e uma grande confusão
e me atinha em respirar na tentativa de recuperar- me da câimbra que sentira no cérebro,
na náusea que tinha com a superficialidade das minhas palavras, na vergonha
que tinha do meu monumento de sabedoria, e na possibilidade de que, por acidente,
pudesse &nbsp;escutar meu devaneio.