RELACIONAMENTO  COM  PESSOAS  DIFICIEIS - Parte 2
Autor: Claudia Gravalos | Publicado: 2013-04-20T23:02:00-03:00



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No artigo anterior refletimos
como a outra pessoa nos trata, nesse, vamos pensar em como nós tratamos a outra
pessoa. Relembrando... [...] Não conseguimos entender porque ele(a) está agindo
assim. Agora é o momento de respirar fundo e amar essa pessoa. Sim, amar em
forma de paciência, tolerância, compreensão, carinho e não revidar a agressão,
mas encontrar maneiras de neutralizá-las... e se eu não consigo? O que eu faço?
[...] A primeira pergunta é: por que não consigo? Qual meu conceito de amar o
outro? Onde estou falhando? Qual é a minha dificuldade? Como trato a outra
pessoa? Como reajo quando não sou atendido? Quando ouço uma agressão? Como
recebo tudo isso? Que tal fazer uma autoanálise de sua maneira de se relacionar
com os outros? Se você for honesto nessa reflexão, provavelmente chegará à
conclusão de que é muito exigente. Quer que o outro atenda seus desejos e
necessidades. Perceberá que você projeta expectativas que talvez o outro não
possa corresponder (e na maioria das vezes não pode mesmo). Idealiza uma
relação perfeita, sem dor, nem sofrimento, sem decepções, nem frustrações. Mas
o que é a frustração senão a decepção de nossas expectativas? 

Já disse Fritz Perls, psiquiatra e psicoterapeuta alemão: “Eu não estou
neste mundo para viver as suas expectativas. E você não está neste mundo para
viver as minhas. Você é você, e eu sou eu, e se, por acaso, nós nos
encontrarmos, será lindo. Se não, nada se pode fazer”. E quando não se há nada
a fazer, só resta aceitar. Aceitação é um processo em que compreendo a maneira
de ser e de pensar do outro e embora não concorde, respeito. Dessa maneira
entendo suas limitações e dificuldades. Exigências de perfeição limitam a
capacidade do indivíduo de funcionar dentro de si mesmo (Perls). Os grupos de
AAs (alcoolicos anônimos tem uma oração que é pertinente: “Concedei-nos,
Senhor, a serenidade necessária para aceitar as coisas que não podemos
modificar, coragem para modificar aquelas que podemos, e sabedoria para
distinguir umas das outras”. É um bom caminho... Boa sorte nos seus
relacionamentos!



&nbsp; 

Claudia Gravalos dos Santos - &nbsp;psicóloga - claudiagravalos@yahoo.com.br

Av.
Pedro Américo, 811 - Santo André - Telefones: 3969-7516 &nbsp; / &nbsp;
99735-7727