WTLO - Season 1: Stuck on you - Chapter 7 - Let the flames begin
Autor: Lôa | Publicado: 2017-02-19T11:27:00-03:00


So many lights…

The sound was kinda loud.

I felt dizzy.

But I wasn’t drunk. I hadn’t put a single drop of alcohol in my mouth. My dizziness came from the intense desire I was feeling, so foreign, so weird, but strong to the point of making my hands itch, my heart thunder, my body tingle and my head pound.

Fuck, why did he have to dance like that, in front of me?

Well, not really in front of me…

Edward was twenty feet away from where I was. I was a little away from the gang, leaned on an iron grid, trying to lessen my bad mood. He was among our friends, drinking and dancing and enjoying the concert. Something that I should have been doing but simply wasn’t. I couldn’t. I had too much going on in my head. I was totally distressed. And the way he was moving his body to the beat of the songs wasn’t helping.

Telling the truth, there was nothing much on the way he was dancing. He was just shaking his body in perfect sync with the song, kinda rolling his hips in a smooth way combining that with slightly sinuous movements of his torso and shoulders... 

Fuck, nothing much my ass. He was sexy!

And that was a new fucking first.


I'd never payed any attention to the way any girl danced. I'd never payed any attention to the way anyone danced! I’d never bothered to notice the way Edward danced, either. But since I was deeply aware of every little thing he did those days, it wasn't that surprising that I was unwillingly focused on his (fucking damn hot) body moves. 

I was a little in awe with his perfect coordination and rhythm, but since Edward was perfect in most things he did, and being a musician certainly helped a lot, well, I should've imagined.

What was really surprising me (embarrassing me would also be a perfect definition) was the fact that my body was responding (profusely) to the scene my eyes were capturing.

I’d never felt aroused just by looking at someone. But, hell! I could feel my temperature rising and my breathing hitching.

He had his back to where I was, a beer bottle in his left hand, his hips swaying with the beat, his right hand running through his slightly damp hair, droplets of sweat glistening on his nape...

God! I wanted to lick his fucking neck! Where did this damn desire come from?

A small hand circled my right wrist and pulled me down sideways. “Let's take a walk around?” Bella's voice filled my right ear and I was finally able to rip my eyes away from Edward.

I looked at her with questioning eyes. I didn't really want to get outta there.

She creased her forehead and stood on her toes to reach my ear again. “You're drooling. You're practically eye-fucking him.” She argued and my heart missed a beat while my stomach churned. “If you're not ready to have everyone knowing about your feelings for him, you'd better come with me.”

She got down on her feet and looked up at me with a pointed look. I could identify the tender worry in them.

I nodded, reached for her hand and let her pull me to wherever we were going. As we started to get distant from the rest of the gang I glanced back instinctively.

Edward was looking at us, not dancing anymore, his face blank and emotionless but there was something in his eyes… A glint I couldn't recognize but that was clear enough for me to notice.

Before I could gesticulate that we were coming back in a short while he looked away, his teeth going straight to his lips.

Nervous, angry or curious? Those were the only emotions (that I knew of) that would provoke such reaction from him.

I sighed and turned my eyes ahead. How would I know?

Bella and I walked through the crowd until we found a row of bleachers. She sat and petted the space by her side. I sat too.

“Was I too obvious?” I asked without looking at her.

“Well, yeah.” Bella replied in an emphatic tone. “Luckily, everyone else was looking at the stage.” 

“I couldn't help it!” I was justifying myself. “Did you see the way he was moving?”

Bella giggled and I felt my cheeks warming up.

“Yeah, he dances pretty well.”

“He's fucking sexy.” I mumbled, but she could hear me. “Isn't he?” I looked at her.

“He is.” She answered in a broad smile. “You’re crushing deeper on him, aren't you?”

I heaved a sigh. No point in denying it.

“I think I am…” I lowered my head and looked at my hands interlaced on my lap. “What do I do with this, Bella?” I turned swiftly and straddled the bleacher. “The feelings I have for him are getting stronger by the minute, and I don't think I'll be able to hide it very much longer.” my voice was suddenly beyond strained, and I could feel how deeply creased my forehead was. “I'm so scared.” 

My chest was so heavy I had to bow. My fingers found my hair and interlocked in the curls while I rested my elbows on my thighs.

“I’ve never felt this way before.” I whispered. “I’ve never felt this attracted to anyone, it’s so strong it’s overwhelming, suffocating, maddening…” I sighed and straightened my upper body, releasing my hair in the process. I looked at her. “It’s like there’s wildfire in my veins. I want him so bad that I’m starting to doubt my sanity.” 

I think she understood how truly desperate I was, ‘cause she turned to me quickly, folded one of her legs up on the seat and opened her arms. “Come here.” 

I complied easily, resting my cheek on her shoulder and circulating her narrow waist. Her slim arms were around me in no time and I sighed feeling comfortable. Bella rested her chin on my shoulder and took a slow long breath.

We remained like that for a long while, until I was feeling a little better. She was so sensitive she knew the exact moment to resume our conversation.

“Have you thought about talking to him?” Her voice was soft and caring.

I exhaled heavily with the thought and turned my head on her shoulder to rest my forehead on it.

“Like, telling him what’s going on?” My voice sounded skeptical and muffled. I felt her nod. “I can’t.” I shook my head slightly.

She squeezed me a little.

“Of course you can. And I think it’s the best way to deal with it.”

I kissed her shoulder and pushed away just a little, so I could look at her.

“I’m really scared, Bella.” I confessed. “I don’t know if I have the courage to tell him.”

I sighed and she brought her hands to my face, joining our foreheads. 

“You don’t need to be scared.” She whispered. &nbsp;“You have me, I’m here for you. You won’t go through this alone, but you have to start thinking about what you’ll do. You can’t simply ignore all this. At some point you’ll have to act on it, one way or another.”

She pushed away and let go of my face, sitting straight. I nodded and imitated her gesture, sighing heavily to recompose myself. I was going through damn much!

“Is there something else bothering you?” She asked, observant as ever.

Once again I chose not to open up. I wanted to go back to Edward (or better saying to near him), and I definitely didn’t want to risk the frail control over the emotions that were bubbling up I got to keep till then.

So I shook my head. “No. Everything else is OK.” I lied in a surprising steady tone.

She squinted her eyes a little but didn’t make any comments. “Are you ready to go back? Can you keep it together?”

“I’ll try.” I said in a heavy exhalation. “I’ll just concentrate on the band.” I smiled a little.

She smiled back. “OK. Let’s go.”

Bella took my hand on hers and we went through the crowd again. Once we approached our friends, Edward and Emmet turned to us with weird looks, and their eyes went straight to mine and Bella’s hands, that were still interlaced.

She didn’t bother to let go of my hand, even though it was obvious that she could see the frown Emm was sporting. I guess she just took a little advantage of our chaste gesture to provoke him a little. I understood her pretty well, ‘cause I was kind of doing the same while I payed attention to the way Edward’s lips pursed just before he looked away.

Of course in her case she was being obviously successful, while on mine I couldn’t be sure. Actually, I felt kinda dumb trying to make Edward jealous. The possibilities of him feeling something remotely similar to what I was feeling towards him were so tenuous...

“I want a beer, do you want one?” Bella asked me after turning to me with a big smile lighting up her face. I knew it!

“No, I’m good.” I answered smiling back, finding the situation really amusing.

She let go of my hand and got on her toes, supporting herself with her hands on both my shoulders. She was putting up quite a show. And it was working ‘cause the big guy was still looking although trying to be discrete. “Control yourself.” She whispered in my ear and I smiled at the exact moment Edward looked back.

Bella got down on her feet and I gazed at her with a knowing look and a crooked smile. She winked, giving me the confirmation that I needed. 

As soon as she walked away Edward came towards me. Needless to say that my heart accelerated just a little.

He offered me his beer bottle, which I accepted, and I took a sip.

“So, you finally scored?” His voice was weird.

“Huh?” I uttered, not really understanding what he meant.

“You and Bella.” He said while lifting his eyebrows.

“What about Bella and I?” I asked a little confused with what he was referring to. 

He looked away sporting a humorless smile. “You know, Jay, sometimes your naivety really gets to me.” He rushed through the words and I got a little tense with his slightly harsh intonation. He looked at me again, his eyes getting dark. “You two took a while to come back and…” He huffed a brief laugh. “I was worried about you.” He shrugged. “So I went after you two.” He stopped and kept looking at me like expecting a reply.

When I didn’t give him one he laughed, shaking his head. That was when I noticed he was swaying a little.

“How many beers did you have?” I asked worried.

He leaned sideways to me and my whole body trembled with his approximation. “I saw you two cuddling up.” And I could, at last, pinpoint the strangeness in his voice. He was drawling. “So, yes or no? Did you or did you not score?”

I didn’t really want to answer to that because it simply didn’t make any sense. He knew well my crush on Bella had long passed and I loved her as my friend. Besides, I was really stunned with what was in front of me.

“Edward, you’re drunk.” I stated in a skeptic tone.

He laughed again. “So what? You can and I can’t?” He used a defiant tone. “Don’t worry, you won’t have to take care of me. I’m pretty fine. Just a little high.”

I sighed. It was so not him to behave like this.

“You know I’d never mind having to take care of you.” He sighed, looked away and nodded subtly. &nbsp;“Are you OK?” I questioned in a low tone. “You never get drunk. Something bothered you.”

“Maybe.” He got serious all of a sudden. 

“What is it?” My tone was cautious.

He looked at me with piercing eyes and, again, he gave me that look as if he was trying to figure something out. Then he shook his head and sighed, directing his gaze to the stage in front of us.

That attitude of his frustrated me completely. Lately he seemed to be always keeping something from me. But who was I to judge? I was keeping something from him too.

“Where’s your sister?” He asked out of nowhere, looking nonchalant, and this cold sensation spread wild throughout me.

So that was what was bothering him… Rose was not there. 

It was so obvious, why didn’t I see it?

I clenched my teeth and swallowed hard. The jealousy getting to me faster than a lightning bolt.

“Home.” I replied concisely, afraid of pouring the emotion into my words. “Why?”

He shrugged. “I noticed her absence. I thought she was coming.” His eyes were still away from mine.

I felt a deep twinge in my heart. Shit. He was probably expecting to get to her then. Maybe this was the opportunity he had been waiting for...

“She was. But she was stupid enough to make a huge mistake and get herself grounded.” My voice was saturated with anger. Due to the events that took place in the morning, but mostly because I was frustrated with the fact that he clearly wanted her to be there. “And of course the consequences fell over me as well.” &nbsp;

He turned his head in my direction so fast I thought he would have a whiplash. His eyes were worried like earlier in the car. “That’s why you got late.” It wasn't a question. And as if feeling that that was the moment to confirm his suspicions, he held my forearm in the exact place I had the proof he needed. “Tell me what happened, Jay.”

“Ouch.” I mumbled automatically when his hold deepened on my bruised skin. It fucking hurt.

Edward didn’t say anything. His eyes got bigger and he let go of my arm quickly to hold my wrist. Then he pulled up the shirt sleeve with his free hand.

I looked away as soon as Jasper Senior’s finger marks were exposed. 

“Fucking hell.” Edward groaned. “Damn mother fucker son of a bitch.” 

His voice was so unusually angry that I was compelled to look at him. His face was distorted in a mask of rage. I’d never seen him like that before.

“I’m gonna fucking kill him.” He said in a tone that sounded really scary.

And suddenly he was walking away from me.

“Hey, where you’re going?” I asked urgently while following him. “Edward!”

He never looked back, he was marching forward, steadfast, and all I could do was follow. As he got out of the stadium and turned on the right, I knew he was heading to Emm’s car. I remembered he never gave back the big guy’s keys. They were still in his pocket.

“E, tell me what you’re doing.” My voice was pleading, and I was almost jogging to keep up with his steps.

He was almost reaching the car, but before he approached it I took two strides and stopped between the car and him. He stood tall right in front of me.

“Get outta my way, Jasper.” He said while dourly looking down at me from his 6’4.

Of course I was intimidated, all he needed to do was push me away, he wasn’t only taller but also stronger than me. But for damn sure I’d put up a fight. 

“I will if you tell me what you’re doing.”

He tried to dodge me by moving to the right side but I moved faster, stretched my arms and splayed my hands on his chest.

Fuck, it's harder than I thought!

Oh, get a fucking grip! It’s not the time for your girly bullshit. 

I took a deep breath to center myself and control my inner monologue.

“Jasper, just let me go.” He warned me in a very grave tone, seeming possessed by fury. His eyes were dark grey and his pupils were almost completely dilated. I’d never seen him so angry.

And it was my fucking fault.

“Where are you going?” I insisted. “You cannot drive in the state you’re in.”

“The fuck I can’t.” he said in a harsh tone before jerking my hands away from him (with only his left one) and passing. &nbsp;

I ran to the other side of the car. If he was going somewhere, I was going too. As soon as the alarm was disabled I opened the passenger door and hopped in.

Edward got in the driver’s seat, sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Get outta the car.” He mumbled, clearly making a huge effort to control himself.

“No. If you’re drunk driving then I’m coming with you.”

He closed the door and I did the same, but he never started the car.

For half a minute we were in silence. He had his eyes closed and was still pinching his nose. His breath was weary. And I just waited.

“Tell me how this happened.” He demanded. His tone left no room for arguments.

I sighed.

“My dad got down as soon as you went home. He came asking me about Rose and I told him she was probably in her room, sleeping. The thing is… She wasn’t. He called Lauren’s house and someone said she had just left, so we waited. But she got home only by eleven.” I heaved a deep sigh. “My father was pissed. He had to delay his cadets group departure, and you know how he is when anything at home affects his job…” Edward nodded, not looking at me. “While we waited he started to blame me.”

The steering wheel leather cover squeaked. I looked at his hand and cringed a little when I noticed his knuckles were white, so hard he was gripping the wheel. Edward exhaled and straightened up, opened his eyes and looked straight ahead.

“How so?” His voice was controlled.

“Well, he said I was her big brother and that I should have been taking care of her. That I shouldn’t have left her alone in the party and that I should’ve gone there to pick her up.” I sighed. “I took everything as usual, in silence. I’m used to this shit.”

He leaned his head on the backrest and turned his face to me.

“You shouldn’t be. This is wrong in so many ways.” I could still identify the drawling in his speech, but he seemed very much present and lucid. “I’ve always had a problem with him being harsh and demanding to you, but since he's your father, and a Major, I guess he's entitled to be like this, and I can't interfere… But this…” he moved so fast I almost didn’t see when he turned completely, held my arm and lifted my sleeve again. “This is fucking bullshit! He hurt you!”

I lowered my head, ashamed.

His right hand was in my chin in a blink, raising my face.

“Don’t.” He stated seriously. “It’s not your fault.”

“It kinda is…” I contradicted, trying to ignore the sensation that was pulsating and spreading from the place his fingers were touching my skin. “I should’ve picked her up. I shouldn’t have left her alone in that party.”

Edward let go of my face and heaved an irritated sigh.

“Jasper, this is not a good enough reason for him to hurt you physically.” His voice was strained and a little louder. “He already hurts you psychologically on a daily basis with no reason at all, and now… Fuck! You’re bruised! This is abuse.”

God knows I was completely aware that that was true. It was abuse. My father was obsessive, harsh and abusive, and I hated him for treating me so terribly, but I couldn't really say that he had attacked me that morning.

Besides, I needed to put Edward's mind at ease. He was in the verge of being uncontrolled, his hands were shaking.

So I rushed to explain.

“Look, E… You know I hate him, so I'm not defending him, but he didn’t do it intentionally.”

He huffed and rolled his eyes.

“He didn’t!” I insisted. “Listen, when Rose arrived he was going full blown at her, shouting and trying to grab her… I put myself in between them so I could shield her. He held my arm so he could take me out of the way and reach her, but I struggled until my mom came and took Rose away from the living room. He let go of my arm as soon as she was gone, but you know how I bruise easily…” I shrugged. 

Edward heaved a loud sigh and held his head, bowing his torso soon after.

We were silent again for some minutes, until he straightened up again and looked at me.

“He shouldn't have held your arm so forcefully.” He grumbled. “I can understand he didn't hurt you willingly but, he must have been aware he was holding you this hard.” He pointed to my forearm with his right hand. “And fuck if he doesn't know how wrong it is.” He diverted his eyes from mine and gazed ahead, anger still very visible in his expression. “He shouldn't have gone at Rosalie in the first place. No need to be that aggressive.”

This time I sighed discreetly, trying to contain the prompt envy that took me. He was worried about my sister and it was justified. I had been too when all that shit happened. I could understand his feeling that way, especially if considered that he liked her. But the jealousy was immediately burning me out regardless.

“That's just who he is, and you know it.” I kinda lamented.

“Unfortunately, I know.” He huffed again.

Then he took a deep breath, rubbed his face and ran his hands through his hair. When he looked at me again his eyes were kinda glossy. I couldn't really imagine why.

“I’m sorry I overreacted.” his tone was calmer. “I don’t like the way he’s been treating you, and I swear to God I’ll keep an eye on it, but… I shouldn’t have reacted the way I did. I was a little drunk indeed and…” He exhaled heavily and spoke through clenched teeth. “I hate it when you’re hurt.”

I smiled a little, feeling slightly happy that he worried about me too.

“You’re too protective of me.” I don’t really know why I made the comment, but it felt right.

“I am.” He affirmed, making me feel oddly sheltered.

“You don’t need to be.”

His face got even more serious than it already was, and his eyes got so dark again it was kind of scary. His expression was deeply intense.

“Yes, I do.” 

And then I was gone again. Like in that morning, when our eyes got locked, I lost myself in his irises and was fast drowning.

“Why?” I heard myself asking but I couldn’t really recognize my own voice.

I could hear the strong rapid beats of my heart in my ears.

He spent a whole eternity looking at me with that scrutinizing gaze again. I couldn’t breathe.

“Because…” He started to say, and suddenly his irises begun to lighten, getting bluer and bluer as he breathed. “Because I…”

A fucking damn phone started to ring so fucking loud that both of us jumped on our seats, interrupting him. I immediately wanted to break something.

Edward reached in his pocket and took out his cellphone. 

“It's Emmet. He probably wants to know where we are.” He said in a sigh.

Moment broken once again. What the hell?!

He was about to tell me something, and I wanted to know what it was really bad, but I didn't know how to bring it up again.

“We better get going.” He said in a oddly defeated tone.

His hand went for the knob, and I thought as fast as I could about something to keep him there until I was able to come up with a way to make him resume what he was saying.

“E, what were you thinking on doing when you stormed out like that?” It was a dignified question. I wanted to know that too.

He sighed and turned to me, but his hand remained on the knob.

“I wasn't really thinking, Jay. I was kinda being driven by the alcohol haze. I don't know…” He shrugged. “I just got mad at your father for harming you…”

“I've never seen you angry like that. You kinda scared me.” I laughed lightly.

He followed me.

“Feel better now?” I was just temporizing to be completely honest.

“I'm definitely not drunk anymore.” He smiled humorlessly.

“And why were you?” He immediately averted his eyes from my face and looked ahead. “Something got into you. You never drink to the point of getting drunk.” He lowered his head as he exhaled heavily. “what was bothering you?”

He took a deep breath and ran his hands through his hair again. I held my breath because I had the impression he was preparing himself to tell me something.

But when his face turned to mine with a very hesitant expression, the damn phone rang again.

“Fuck.” He muttered, looking down at his phone with a frown while I heaved a very annoyed sigh. “What, Emmet?” He answered clearly irritated. I guessed because of the interruption. “We're outside.” He paused, listening. “No, nothing's wrong, I just needed to talk to Jay without all the noise.” He paused briefly this time. “Yeah. OK.” He hung up and looked at me. “We need to go back. He'll just keep calling until we get there. He's worried about you.”

I swallowed a curse and clenched my teeth. Couldn't we have a moment alone?

But since I had no good excuse to keep him there with me, I simply resigned and nodded.

We didn't talk as we got out of the car and went back to our friends. And for the rest of the festival I stood by Bella's side while he talked to Emmet, seeming despondent.

On the way home we exchanged two or three words, but he was distracted, kinda distant, his eyes vague.


I wondered why…



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