Determination
Autor: Juliana Torres | Publicado: 2014-10-08T19:24:00-07:00


Everything was a lot to
process. I opened my eyes. The lights hurt. I tried again, slowly now. All that
I could see was white, everywhere around me. There were sounds, beep, beep,
beep; people whispering, and my own breathing. It hurt. The most natural thing
to a human hurt so badly. I pressed the button and a nice lady came to see what
I needed. Her name was Maria, and she was almost forty. She was my nurse, the
nurse who was responsible for me. She gave me some medicine to help me breathe
better. I tried to move but my neck and my ribs were on fire. 

&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; I opened my eyes, and did not know if it was day or
night, what time of the day was, or for how long I slept. Button. Nurse. It was
a different now. He was not as kind as Maria, and I felt desperate, the pain
was back. Why my ribs were hurt? The nurse explained to me that I had a tube
between my ribs, to drain the fluids. I thought that my ribs could not have
liquids, so I figured that he was talking about somewhere else that had been
drained. My family was there. I wanted to cry and force them to take me home,
but no one was allowed to give me any kind of liquid, not even water. My mouth
was dehydrated. My mom kissed me on the forehead and I felt asleep. 

&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; I was suffocating when I woke up, and it was so hot!
Someone please take all the blankets off. I was just thinking about air. I
needed air. Fresh air.

&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Maria was back; she talked with me and said that my mom
went home to rest, and eat something. It was only my second day, and I was
starting to feel better, but the pain in my neck was killing my good night of
sleep. I could not move. I had many “stickers” on me, beeping and blinking a
red light. I just wanted to go home, and be able to play again. The worst day
of my life was the day that I found out that I would not have the physical
capacity of doing any exercise after the surgeries. I would be a useless
person; I did not know anything else, besides playing and being at the gym all
the time. I have never worked on my life; it was not a choice, just a distant
thing. I needed the machines to work while my body was recovering. I felt powerless.

&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; What is the point? My whole life as an athlete was going
to be flushed down the toilet by some stupid clot. My functional body would
have to be stopped just because my ribs were too close. No effort in all those
years of practice were worth it anymore. 

&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; My hope was almost dead, but as an athlete, we are taught
to have perseverance. Imagine if I could prove my doctor wrong and be able to
play again, or maybe be a professional… That was my dream, I, a sixteen-year-old
teenager could prove the medicine wrong, just being determined.


&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; If I made it? I am just going to say that everything is
possible.&nbsp;