Whine or Wine?
Autor: Ery Tupyharo | Publicado: 2013-04-21T13:01:00-07:00

I’ve always had, somehow, everything I wanted and have always worked to get anything I felt interested in. But there are some parts of my life which still needed to be worked on. Love life, mainly. How is that possible that with all the joys in life I still haven’t found my other half? Or even, spotted it somewhere. I spent the week complaining about everything that felt wrong in my life lately. My expenses, my jobs, my relationships, things I couldn’t find and considered lost etc. Is it what’s pushing things and people away? How to know it’s time to stop whining and start thanking?
I planned a picnic with friends Sunday morning to keep myself busy from complaining about life. Plus getting me out of my boredom, somehow. Before going to that, I found a belt I had been looking for for almost a month. I got so happy that I forgot all about my morning real bad mood. Despite my general active life, it is the first time in my life when all my close friends are dating (except one or two) and I have been single for a whole long while. John’s been dating for 2 months now and it seems to me he’s really happy. They have a very good relationship and I’m happy for him. The other invite went to a highschool friend, Melanie. She has been dating this guy for what it seems is forever (5 years). They’re engaged. We all have the jobs, the life and the achievements a twenty-something is supposed to have to be successful. Even more that I could expect. I’m just running a little behind in the relationship area.




Starting for the fact that I just feel misplaced in the city yet, I have been thrown for a loop by other thoughts as well. I made a choice in my life last year when it all seemed perfectly fine: I chose to take an opportunity and study, somewhere else. New people, new place, new friends. A complete change of scenario. It had been all good till I realize my other real life was still here waiting for me. My family, my job and my bills. As soon as I arrived in Florida, all my “imaginary-miserable-Maringá” life was finally behind me. I did not feel the weight of my whining and daily bad mood. I was new. I was glowing. Everyone around could feel that. And I, for sure, sensed it too. Parties, people, clothes… everything was fabulous. When I came back to Brazil this year, I started feeling a little had changed. I felt I was a new person. Unfortunately, it seemed to me that everybody else here had changed too. Everything I had here was gone and it has been really hard to build something new. Maybe it is that “nothing stays the same” that people change. But it might also be the reason for me never wanting to stay in this place? May I have gotten addicted to complaining? So, it is inevitable to wonder: Is it me?
I have been trying as hard as I can not to complain this time. I have even made up some real good activities to do whilst I am waiting. What for, again? I even questioned: Is keeping your sincere thoughts and opinions about a place and lifestyle the new Secret? Is it hiding your feeling what makes you a desirable person? What I wanted to do since the very beginning was to wrap all the bad things I think of everything and throw them away. Like we do with the last-year wishes we wrap on dollar bills and leave on our wallets for the entire year. And when the year is done, we can finally find a stream, or it should be, and let the water-flow takes it away. Should our bad thoughts be taken by the stream-flow? Water, water everywhere and not a drop to drink. So many people, so many new faces every year… 
It was Sunday afternoon when I received the phone call from a friend in Maringá, she was getting married. The wedding would take place in the old chapel she was born in her hometown. She, despite of all her cynicism, managed to find a man who loved her deeply and was willing to travel overseas just to get married in an old temple, in Asia. She got the job, got the man, got the happiness she’d always spread around. She invited me with the promise to be filling my glass with only the best wine in the party. 
So maybe there’s still hope. Maybe it is just a matter of not whining and accepting the wine life provides you.