A cura não é um novo amor
Autor: Marcella Fernanda | Publicado: 2013-06-30T19:53:00-07:00



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Aceitar um fim é aceitar um novo
começo. Continuar numa relação onde as pessoas não mais se relacionam faz tanto
sentido quanto ir patinar porque está com fome. Você perde tempo, pessoas,
vida. Você ganha arranhões que poderiam ter sido evitados, ganha mágoas de
alguém que poderia ter sido sempre especial e só. Ninguém disse que iria ser
fácil, ninguém disse que não iria doer. O costume grita e você pensa que é o
amor ainda vivo em algum canto. Grande engano, grande perigo. Até que o costume
mude de figura, tudo é vazio, lembrança, saudade, tudo é ele. Mesmo depois do
fim, mesmo sem amor. É o velho vício de mexer na ferida, sentir fisgada só pra
não ficar sem sentir nada. E você ouve muitas fórmulas pra fazer tudo isso
passar mais rápido, muito atalho tentando driblar o tempo. Não vou dizer que
nenhum funciona, assim como não digo que algum funcione a longo prazo ou
definitivamente. Não importa quantos corpos você tenha no verão, no inverno
você sente falta da história, da alma, das manias. Vai ser ele por um bom tempo
o dono das saudades bobas, das carências mais fortes, do carinho. E não tem
fórmula mágica pra isso. Agora, se acabou, com certeza teve um bom motivo, já
deixou de ser bonito como nas lembranças preferidas, por mais difícil que seja
lembrar dos fatos por esse ângulo. E pro costume tomar uma nova forma, você tem
que usar novos moldes, sem recaídas, sem se fechar pro mundo. Você vai tentar
substituir ele por outro, assim, como quem muda de manteiga no café da manhã. E
pode dar muito certo por uns meses, depois o novo cara é só mais um anexo no
arquivo de decepções e a saudade, de algum modo estranho, nem é do cara novo.
Tantas promessas de tudo ser diferente e no fim tudo sempre tão igual. E o
vazio só aumenta, uma bola de neve. Até o dia que você acordar de manhã, se
olhar no espelho e entender que ali tem alguém inteiro e com tudo que você
precisa pra ser feliz. E esse dia, anota aí, vale mais que anos. Não se cura um
amor com um novo amor. Se cura com amor-próprio.