A FREIRA
Autor: Sales Andrade | Publicado: 2013-08-16T11:41:00-07:00

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Judite, após mais uma decepção com os homens,
resolveu ser freira.

–Pois é isso, mamãe papai. Eu não quero mais
viver nesse mundo de ilusão. Por isso, vou entrar prum convento.

Emocionada, prosseguiu:

-Eu...eu...eu resolvi ser freira!

-Mas essa menina só pode tá ficando doida. Agora
inventou isso.

-Seu pai tem razão, minha filha. Faça suas
caridades por aqui mesmo. Num precisa entrar pro convento.

-Não, mãe. Eu num vou me arrepender.Nasci pra
viver longe desse mundo cruel.

E a Judite foi parar num convento, onde
passou a ser chamada de irmã Branquinha.

-Olha, irmã Lidu, se eu soubesse que aqui era
o meu lugar, já tinha vindo antes. Eu to tão chateada com os homens

-Mas isso não é motivo irmã. Eu virei freira
porque nasci para servir ao Senhor. Não foi por causa de namorado. Nunca
namorei na minha vida!

-Vixe! Quero dizer, nossa!

Nesse momento a voz da madre superiora se fez
ouvir:

-Padre Ribeirim, num se esqueça de arranjar
um pessoal pra consertar algumas portas do corredor que tão quase caindo!

-Eu vou providenciar tudo hoje. Agora já vou
para a minha igreja. 

A conversa chegou aos ouvidos dos malacas Noé
e Rui do Pantanal...

-Ouviu o que eu ouvi, brode. A irmã de
caridade falô praquele padre que
arranjasse uns carpinteiro pra dar um grau naquelas portas!

-E daí, mermão? Nós num semu carpinteiro! Vê se num mistura as coisa!

Mas tu é mermu
&nbsp;&nbsp;um tapado, um Mané! Nós vai é
bancar o carpinteiro e fazer uma parada no convento!

Os malacas logo começaram a estudar uma
maneira de entrar no convento. Horas depois,entupiram no convento e anunciaram
que queria falar com a madre superiora.

-A madre superiora tá no seu repouso matinal.

-Que papo mais fuleiro é esse!Vá lá e acorde!


As irmãs ficaram em polvorosa. Enquanto as
outras freiras gritavam,a &nbsp;irmã
Branquinha permanecia na dela... 

-Ai, que homem forte, saradão, bonitão é
aquele que tá com a camisa desabotoada...arriscado até pegar uma virose com
essa chove não molha! 

Uma viatura da PM esteve no local mas os
bandidos já haviam tomado rumo ignorado. A irmã Branquinha renunciou ao hábito
e voltou para casa, onde conta para as amigas...

-Quando vi aquele homão musculoso, foi que eu
dei fé que num tinha vocação pra ser freira, amém...