Falando de Amor
Autor: Henrique | Publicado: 2012-03-09T12:47:00-08:00

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 Amar é fácil e difícil ao mesmo tempo. Quando amamos, emanamos esse sentimento para alguém. Quando esse alguém também nos ama, ótimo, recebemos também amor. O que dificulta são as diferenças. Se depender do sentimento, agimos só pelo coração. Mas precisamos de um direcionamento racional, para equilibrar o que o que sentimos e converter as diferenças em acordos. Não adianta querermos permanecer com atitudes já interiorizadas no ego. Para amar, temos que nos adaptar uns aos outros. Traçar objetivos em comum, ajustar um comportamento aqui, outro ali. Não significa mudar a personalidade, mas lapidá-la a favor do amor, de uma convivência mútua que precisa de doses de humanismo, afeto, consideração.
O amor maduro entre homem e mulher é uma conquista de longos anos. Essa conquista pode vir durante um mesmo amor, ou vir após vários (relacionamento, casamento, namoro). Nem todos estão preparados e amadurecidos o suficiente para compartilhar vida, intimidade, sentimentos com outra pessoa. Isso serve para todos os tipos de amor (homem e mulher, amor pelos filhos, amor pelos amigos). Nesse caso, há o que se trabalhar (psicologicamente) nas bases do desenvolvimento da personalidade que foram oferecidas pela educação familiar e cultural. Com esse trabalho, podemos conquistar uma nova estrutura individual da própria personalidade.
Uma grande dificuldade no amor, é quando colocamos no outro nossa felicidade, passando ele a ser a razão da mesma e de nossa existência. Não é difícil isso acontecer, principalmente em pessoas muito carentes de afeto. Na realidade, aquele que vem para partilhar a vida (a pessoa a quem amamos) deve apenas somar emoções. Se algum dia se for, que leve apenas o que trouxe, não arrancando pedaços de nós. Sendo assim, devemos nos amar e exercitar a autoestima sempre. Para a grande maioria das pessoas é um exercício difícil, mas é só praticar.
Através de experiências a dois que forem vivenciadas, o amor vai se constituindo. Haverá conflitos sempre, não tem jeito (somos humanos), mas o que vai mudando com o tempo é o equilíbrio psicológico e diferenças vão se acertando e se encaixando, dissolvendo os conflitos naturalmente.
 Estarmos dentro do coração, um do outro, deve nos trazer bem-estar e confiança em um sentimento compensador. A paz vai se fortalecendo gradualmente. Haverá momentos em que ela estará presente só em um, ou só em outro. O que não pode acontecer é ela não estar presente em nenhuma das partes. É interessante então, o que estiver em momento pacífico, ceder.&nbsp;Andréa Lopes - Psicóloga e colunista