UM TEMPO ENTRE EMBRULHOS
Autor: Luz de velas, Lamparinas e Lampiões | Publicado: 2013-08-10T04:07:00-07:00

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&nbsp; "Os olhos mentem
&nbsp;&nbsp; Dia e noite
&nbsp;&nbsp; A dor da gente"


No começo, o choque


A
perplexidade&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;


Mas que embrulho era aquele?


Pensando em Clarice, digo:


"Não quero ser compreendida,


Quero ser amada!"


Hoje faço o que me der na telha!


Tenho um signo


Libra


Vênus do amor


A Lua em Áries


Que me confere essa alma livre.


Não me rendo à símbolos


Nem mesmo à servidão&nbsp; 


Sempre ela!


Sei que há o tempo e o acaso


E a eles, acrescento o grão do imprevisto


E há também o silêncio...


Eu tenho medo. Medo?


Que medo!


Da grandeza de ser mulher.


E é essa grandeza


Tão reta e tão enxuta


Que chega a ser feroz de tão enxuta


E límpida


E exata.


Sou musgo e pedra


Caminho entre nuvens


Sem esquecer de por meus pés no asfalto


Para percorrer os dias


No mundo de desencanto e náusea


ou na Pasárgada idealiza por mim.


E, vaidade das vaidades,


Ponho-me a escrever


Não como um tormento a me perseguir


E, sim, com um alento nas minhas lembranças.


Saboreio a textura das palavras


Dispostas em tramas e textos


E faço porque, lúcida,


Procuro por memórias,


Por molduras,


Por imagens


Para viver.


Quero ser clara,


E, em meio à claridade,


De repente, a escuridão.


De quando em quando,


As sentinelas íntimas


Do meu lado santa


Alertam-me,


Para que não veja


Propositadamente,


A intolerável cólera


Dos dias que virão.


Tento


(re)frear o tempo


Que insiste em não parar


E hoje uso mais cores que outrora:


Vermelho, magenta, violeta e rosa chá


Vivo um exílio provisório


Atado por obrigações e horários


Que se reconstroem,


Revelando-se


Na reclusão


Do isolamento.


Sou um ser gregário


Mas eis a contradição,


O paradoxo:


Preciso de silêncios, de quietude


Para ouvir apenas o som dos meus fantasmas...


No fundo (e na superfície)


Espero a chegada de um tempo mais ameno


Mais brando


Onde possa estar entre meus livros e meu gato,


E que a violência do mundo


Nada mais seja que pesadelos...


Mas, que embrulho era aquele?


Aquele embrulho era a minha vida,


E, dele , tento desatar os nós,


E guardo as fitas e o papel de presente


Com corações vermelhos sob fundo cor de rosa,


Que são as minhas mais felizes lembranças!