Pequenezas
Autor: Rafael Escobar, | Publicado: 2011-02-22T19:55:00-08:00

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É quando chega o fim do dia e as tarefas e obrigações já não preocupam mais, os deveres não afligem e os arrependimentos já estão quase esquecidos, que eu começo a me perguntar sobre o quão importante foram as pequenas decisões que tomei durante o dia, sobre qual é a relevância tanto para mim quanto para os outros de todos os minúsculos atos que tive coragem de representar e se algum dia realmente encontrarei um verdadeiro motivo por trás de tudo isso. “Viva cada dia como se fosse o último”, alguns já me responderam. Confesso que me esforço incansavelmente para compreender essa frase e penso profundamente para tentar achar a intenção da pessoa quando diz isso. Eu nem mesmo lembro de todas as coisas que aconteceram hoje, nem mesmo sei o que havia planejado e não cumpri, quase não recordo as &nbsp;coisas que mais fiz. Meu dia acabou, mas durou muito. Durou uma eternidade até agora, durou o suficiente para deixar desaparecer o que o fez existir. Eu mal sei o que fiz nesse dia que acabou, levaria horas enumerando cada momento e ainda assim não conseguiria. Mas foi nesse dia, quase igual ao de ontem e, com certeza, muito parecido com o de amanhã, que eu fui feliz e triste, que me esbaldei em todas as miudezas da minha imensidão individual de possibilidades. Aprendi sobre mim hoje. Aprendi sobre quem amo e quem odeio e me diverti observando a obrigação da noite de chegar. Passei o dia aprendendo, experimentando e sorrindo, examinei cautelosamente cada paisagem do meu cotidiano e achei de uma beleza incontestável, do teto firme da minha casa, onde apenas uma lâmpada enobrece a visão, às árvores, pessoas, bicicletas e animais que vi na rua. Vivi esse dia como se fosse o meu primeiro, onde eu acordaria com a determinação de achar a razão primordial para tudo isso. Farei isso amanhã também, mesmo sabendo que o dia será praticamente igual.