Cimento (uma memória)
Autor: Ismael Alberto Schonhorst | Publicado: 2012-11-08T23:40:00-02:00

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A única
coisa certa na vida é a morte. A única coisa certa naquele quarto era o
cadáver. Cheiro fúnebre de projeto de vida escorrendo pelas imagens sacras na
parede. A tosse que vinha de lá pontuava um erro. Na minha cabeça, a vida do
passado dela já estava em outro lugar. As histórias contadas eram fantasmas
fétidos nos armários de roupas antigas.

Com a
descoberta do sexo o pavor aumentou. No quarto de vovó, o meu avô não existia
há tempos. E ela também não mais devia estar lá. A vida estava na família
enorme, gerada no quarto. A cama de esperma era endurecida e apagada antes
mesmo de existir como imagem de finalidade. Sua estrutura era a mesma daquele
esqueleto solitário que fingia andar vestido de casacos de lã.

Quando
brincava e lá me escondia, com ela ausente da habitação, também me fingia uma
morte já sentida. Projeto de vida no brincar ao redor do túmulo. As cores
roxas; nada lúcidas; nada eróticas. O gozo que jorra no espaço um tempo
destinado ao fim. Minha vó era e servia de cobra que cisma em querer não-morder o próprio rabo. Humana?
Demasiadamente estúpida em insistir uma vida que não é mais sua. Um espartilho
mofado encostado no armário de roupas mais antigas ainda.

E ela
voltava e me expulsava e se enfurecia. Melhor do que filme de horror na
madrugada. Um quarto no fim do corredor de madeira, à direita. Não entre que é
da vovó. E ela adiando o suspiro final. Rouca. E eu suspirando as histórias dos
porta-retratos.

A casa foi
demolida e ela... continua fingindo estar viva. O quarto se admitiu morto antes
dela. Continua mais branca que a cal dos tijolos tombados (1). Aposto que foi
ela que tombou o quarto para ritualizar um orgasmo e continuar sua farsa.

Hoje mora em
outro quarto. Quanto mais corpos tombarão antes que ela faça a única coisa
certa da sua morte, que é pontuar a vida.

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&nbsp;Descobri que as faixas das múmias tinham cal em sua composição.