Mas eu lembrei que não tenho um zippo.
Autor: Camila Caldeira | Publicado: 2013-04-02T21:39:00-03:00

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É, meu bem, finalmente
encontramos o fim da linha do que já era esperado. Não temos mais um nós e desta vez
ninguém por fora ganhou, roubou ou trapaceou para destruir nosso castelo
invejável. Aconteceu. Não sei se sobraram ruínas do que um dia foi das mais
belas construções feitas por loucos amantes, lembro-me de sentir as estruturas
se abalando, chacoalhando fortemente enquanto você pouco se importava, pois
fumava um cigarro e nada mais poderia ser mais importante que isso. O mundo
podia esperar, até eu – justo eu.&nbsp;&nbsp;



Eu tentava, costumava me
enfrentar para por fim às batalhas mentais apenas para poder alcançar a paz da
tua companhia, entretanto, desta vez eu larguei o barco com suspeita de estar
furado sem me importar com você, com o tão especial “nós”. Peguei minhas
tralhas e fui embora, descobri passando a noite na sarjeta com um fantasma de
outrora que o frio me era melhor companhia. O frio que me trouxe incerteza e
medo ao menos estava ali, o frio que me trouxe doença ao menos deixou
recordação. Eu não quis dizer tchau, não quis dizer o que sentia, não quis tuas
palavras, não quis você.&nbsp;



Agora eu me sento num banco
qualquer e fumo um cigarro, e penso, é vazio sem você aqui. É vazio com tua
presença também. Do vazio não quero mais nada, ele é como você: brota de
repente e toma um espaço muito grande. Não é estorvo, porém pesa.



Você paira sobre minha mente e
não entra. Você absorve minha alma e a torna nada. Você tira de mim os cuidados
e não os devolve. Você me beija e, no entanto, não me quer. Você diz, diz e não fala
porra nenhuma. Você está aqui, mas eu não posso contar. Você é oração... &nbsp;subordinada incompleta. Você é prosa não publicada, uma poesia mal
trabalhada, um cigarro desperdiçado queimando brasa com o vento esquecido num cinzeiro, você é o fluído do meu zippo que acabou de se esvair. 



Você é os textos que eu me
esqueci de terminar. 

Essa merda toda que eu não
consigo largar.