É abril, e eu não tenho uma agenda
Autor: igor santos | Publicado: 2015-04-03T20:06:00-07:00

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Não
chego a dizer ou a pensar que uma agenda seja a coisa mais útil do mundo, mas
quem sou eu para negar o quanto elas nos ajudam?







Falo
das agendas de papel, algo que eu usei em, pelo menos, três dos últimos cinco
anos. Pois bem, cheguei a pensar em comprar uma; afinal de contas, às vezes, eu
sinto falta. Eis que não comprei. Não gostei dos preços que tinham em março. Não
gostei. Não gostei.







Ter
tido agenda durante três anos não me tirou da minha vida de esquecimentos de
sempre, já que muitas vezes eu não me lembrava de que tinha uma agenda. Às vezes
– não foram raras essas vezes –, eu a procurava em qualquer lugar, mesmo que
ela estivesse em minhas mãos.







Esquecia
a agenda que tinha, esquecia o que tinha agendado, esquecia onde estava a
agenda. Enfim, me esqueci do porquê de ter começado esta confissão.







Talvez
se eu tivesse em uma agenda, por escrito, aquilo que eu gostaria de passar
aqueles que tivessem interesse em ler, mas não... não tenho agenda, ou melhor,
até tenho, eletrônica, um smatphone,
resta-me agora lembrar onde é que ele está, já que, antes de perdê-lo, esqueci
de colocar a bateria para carregar.







Não
me faltam esperanças de um dia ter uma agenda que eu abra todos os dias e
consiga segui-la como imagino que as pessoas normais fazem. O meu medo é me
esquecer de fazer isso. Afinal, quando tive agendas, mais me lembrei de abri-la
para marcar compromissos do que para verificar quais eram os compromissos para
o dia em questão. Funcionava assim: compromisso no dia 11; ok, escrevamo-lo no
dia 11 da agenda. Mas quem diz que no tal dia 11 eu me lembraria de verificar o
que lá estivesse escrito.







Pois
bem, depois de refletir um pouco aqui, chego a essa conclusão: não quero
agenda; quero juízo. Ter compromissos no papel é fácil, já ter compromisso
consigo mesmo...