Não vale
Autor: Camila Nogueira | Publicado: 2011-01-19T23:13:00-03:00


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&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Cansada do sofrimento de sua última tentativa frustrada de relacionamento, ela curtia romances de todas as formas que não incluísse sua presença. Livros, filmes e novelas eram, diariamente, devorados de forma incansável na busca de um ‘felizes para sempre’. Colocava-se no lugar das personagens, sofria com eles. Chorava no final. &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Ela ainda se recuperava da morte de um antigo amor, que de tão ingrato só deixou como herança feridas vivas e saudades torturantes. &nbsp;Para se camuflar e deixar de sentir por algum tempo, ainda que pouco, pegava livros na biblioteca. Gostava do cheiro. &nbsp;Usava, assim, de todo o masoquismo pra trocar a dor que deveras sentia por outras, fictícias.&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; O tempo passou. Trouxe a conformação. Trocou a burocracia dos romances pela simplicidade realista. Não queria mais saber dele, não morria se ouvisse seu nome. Nada que a incendiava outrora sobrou nem mesmo para alimentar seu vício de sonho.&nbsp; Sentia-se uma idiota. Cansara-se de cutucar a mesma velha ferida. Era uma pena, mas não valia à pena. Não cabia no amarelo romance empoeirado com data prevista pra devolução. &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Bastava de amores mal vividos, de amantes mal amados, de palavras não ditas. Bastava. Sofrera o necessário para se refazer. Passou. As feridas fecharam, não sobrou uma cicatriz, sequer. E, se o acaso inconvenientemente pensasse em querer fazer recair, não perdia tempo, lembrava: Não vale a pena.