~ I DON’T WANT LOVE. I DON’T LOVE.
Autor: samoa | Publicado: 2011-12-23T19:08:00-08:00

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Foi surpresa que o apartamento não fosse uma bagunça. Quer dizer, claro que o vídeo game estaria ali. Também a caixa com os acessórios do guitar hero, quase junto da porta, que nenhuma mulher permitiria. Mas e os cascos de cerveja, as caixas de pizza e as meias jogadas no corredor, garoto? Eu estava curiosa.Você me chamou pra conhecer o lugar, claro. Garotas, esses são os garotos sendo sutis, e chamando a gente pra conhecer o apartamento, ou seja, o quarto.A geladeira, com os adesivos mais inusitados - as figurinhas de surfistas e marcas de roupa -, isso foi uma surpresa!, emprestada da sua irmã. No escritório, eu te chamei de nerd e insultei os teus bonecos colecionáveis do star wars. Perguntei de quem era a esteira, no único cômodo realmente bagunçado, aquele onde ficavam as caixas (recordações?), notei a ausência de fotos. E na porta do closet, sim, no teu quarto, brinquei com teu terno, com quem você era/é.A gente faz um caminho pra encontrar o momento. E junto da parede, perto da porta, eu te esperei. Você veio: doce, pelos, um beijo. Mas... Voltei à sala. Afinal, eu fui pra jogar. Esse era o combinado, certo? Nós jogaríamos.&nbsp; Exceto que nenhum de nós queria jogar. O telefone tocou. - Tudo bem, atende aí. Levantei, e fui à varanda, me debruçando pra olhar o carro lá em baixo. De verdade, acho que eu só queria ir embora. Eu nunca sei o que passa na cabeça de um garoto, e eu estava nervosa pra caralho. O suficiente pra duvidar, pelo menos.Perguntei se você tinha um cigarro, mesmo sabendo que não. Você era o tipo de cara que não curtia cigarro. Eu queria deixar claro que eu não me importava. Talvez, eu quisesse mesmo que você não gostasse de mim.Busquei aquele assunto delicado. Eu machuco só pra saber o quanto a pessoa aguenta ou porque eu sei que ela vai ceder. Mas você não cedeu. Ainda assim, eu disse que ia embora. Você disse que não, e me abraçou forte. Cara... Acho que toda garota deveria passar por a experiência de sair na ponta dos pés, sapatos nas mãos, antes do dia encontrar um caminho, antes de ser verdade, antes de ele acordar. Mas você me abraçou, e eu não queria mais jogar.