Desalento
Autor: Mi | Publicado: 2013-07-01T00:39:00-03:00










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O nó na garganta iniciou quando eu percebi qual a música que
começara a tocar. Os dedos congelaram com medo da reação alheia. Mas que engano!
Como ele poderia saber¿ O furacão era em minha cabeça, e sequer alguém poderia
imaginar. Somente eu sabia o que se passava, e o quão dolorosa foi àquela
sensação. Amedrontada, agarrei-me em seus braços quentes; que me acolheram
inocentemente.

“Fica comigo então, não me abandona não”
Falei baixinho em seu ouvido. Para ele, era apenas a canção;
para mim a descrição de todos os meus planos e frustrações. Lágrimas &nbsp;difíceis de segurar, a voz falhando...
Continuou o meu tormento. 



“Eu só queria te lembrar
Que aquele tempo eu não podia fazer mais por nós
Eu estava errado e você não tem que me perdoar”

O lugar, os sorrisos, as viagens, as brigas, família,
amigos, planos, desejos, carinho... Tudo que faz parte do meu ser seria
abandonado, sem qualquer aviso prévio e pouca lamentação minha. Era o que eu
imaginava que fosse. E ele ali, me abraçando, beijando; não imaginando que
provavelmente amanhã não estarei mais aqui, não estarei mais ‘perto’ para
dar-lhe a mão, para guia-lo em sua tristeza, para dividirmos nosso dia, para
dar-lhe o amor que somente a ele eu dei. 

“Mas também quero te mostrar
Que existe um lado bom nessa história
Tudo que ainda temos a compartilhar”

A solidão tomou conta, mesmo estando rodeada de pessoas.
Será que um dia serei honesta comigo mesma e com ele¿ Até lá, não estarei mais
em condições de olhá-lo nos olhos e dizer o que eu deveria ter dito naquela
noite. O sentimento ficará guardado, camuflado. 





E há quem diga que eu sou fria como gelo, mas eles não sabem
o que se passa em minha mente.