APRENDENDO A SOBREVIVER
Autor: princesa bulimica | Publicado: 2012-01-06T06:46:00-08:00

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&nbsp;Consegui sobreviver a mais um dia!acho que só hoje,me perguntaram umas 37 vezes se eu estou bem... Bom,eu nao estou!mas consigui fingir&nbsp; super bem.E o engraçado é que quando alguem me pergunta:"Você esta bem?".Eu sempre respondo:"Sim,estou!".Esperando que me digam:"(meu nome),eu sei que você não esta!"
Você tem ideia do que é o sofrimento?
Você sabe como é só conseguir pensar em calorias?
Você sabe como é a fraqueza?
Você sabe como é olhar a comida e sentir nojo?
Você sabe como é ter medo da morte?
Você sabe como é se sentir culpado depois de comer?

  Poderia cortar meus pulsos, porque não?
Outro dia me disseram que engordei, não sei se disseram no bom sentido ou não.
É
muito triste quando nada faz sentido, vc acorda de noite já chorando e 
começa escutar uma música no celular, pra tentar esquecer a dor. Uma vez
eu rezava e pedia pra Deus assim: "Senhor eu só quero ficar bem". Hoje 
eu não peço mais, se tudo ficar bem, ficou e se não ficar não tem 
problema. Quem se importa? Estou com uma vontade enorme, quase maior do 
que eu, de ir ao banheiro e forçar vômito, sei que se o fizesse, estaria
tendo uma recaída, estou com medo de ir parar no hospital como já 
aconteceu, estou com medo de achar novamente que estou sozinha, mas acho
que nunca estive tão sozinha, não quero me sentir gorda, não quero, 
como acontece quase sempre, quando estou entre amigos, todo mundo 
sorrindo, menos eu.Mais amanhã eu vou estar melhor,se eu nao estiver,finjo que estou!!!&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Beijinhos&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Princesa Bulimica...