LA CUCARACHA
Autor: Cascão | Publicado: 2013-12-19T00:13:00-02:00

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<!--StartFragment-->







La cucaracha, la cucaracha

Ya no puede caminar

Porque no tiene, porque le falta

La patita principal



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O livro "CAUSOS DA PROPAGANDA", escrito por um grande amigo, Dorinho, professor da USP e cartunista, reune uma infinidade de causos "ocorridos e acontecidos" em agências de propaganda, e contados com muito bom humor por diversos autores. Este não faz parte da coletânea, mas poderia. Quem sabe numa próxima edição...

Era um final de tarde de um verão
escaldante. O ar condicionado do 23º andar do Conjunto Nacional, em São Paulo,
onde funcionou na década de 80 a agência de propaganda Siboney, não estava dando conta do recado.



Embora fizesse parte do
grupo FCB, no Brasil a agência era comandada pelo irrequieto Gustavo Cubas, empresário
cujo sobrenome já entrega a origem. Eu fazia dupla com uma figura chamada Victor
Nunes, diretor de arte, ilustrador, músico, artista multiplataforma, que além
de ser um grande amigo até hoje, acabou virando também meu padrinho de casamento.


Tínhamos trabalhado
vários dias numa campanha para um prospect importantíssimo. Concorrência graúda
mesmo. No dia da apresentação, a sala de reuniões, imensa, com mesa em “U”, estava abastecida com tudo que um prospect tem direito: comes e bebes, gelo e uísque
já no jeito num canto da sala para uma social depois da apresentação. O cliente sentou
na curva (do U) e o Gustavão – como carinhosamente chamávamos o dono da agência – com
seu português beirando o ininteligível, abriu a reunião, agradeceu a presença,
falou da importância da conta para a agência e seguiram-se os trabalhos: pesquisa,
planejamento e finalmente a criação.


Havia seguramente uma
dúzia de pessoas em volta da mesa, juntando nossa turma com a deles. O Oscar Corea, diretor de criação, me delegou a tarefa de apresentar a campanha. Levantei, e enquanto
me movimentava em torno da mesa, fui falando de
como havia sido estimulante o processo criativo, a satisfação de trabalharmos com uma
marca tão importante, etc e tal. Apresentei e defendi o conceito da campanha e finalmente
comecei a projetar os layouts. A platéia em silêncio.


Num determinado momento
olhei na direção do cliente e vi uma coisa estranha subindo pela manga do seu
casaco. A coisa seguramente também me viu, porque deu uma paradinha antes de
continuar, hesitante, em direção ao colarinho da camisa. Naqueles segundos de estranhamento inicial
entre nós pude ver as suas anteninhas prescrutando o ambiente, e as asas – sim,
asas (o que talvez explicasse como chegou até ali, vinte e três andares acima
do solo) abrindo e fechando, já pressentindo o perigo e avaliando se valeria a
pena continuar a escalada ou seria melhor bater em retirada.


Num primeiro momento eu
gelei. E enquanto metade do meu cérebro continuava a apresentação, a outra metade
começou a pensar em alguma coisa – rápido, qualquer coisa que pudesse evitar o
desastre iminente. Em milésimos de segundos todas as hipóteses passaram pela
minha cabeça. Mas as patinhas da barata cruzando o pescoço do cliente e ela
tentando se aninhar atrás de sua orelha, era a pior de todas. Seria o fim da
reunião, da apresentação e, certamente, da nossa pretensão de pegar a conta. Se a
coisa resolvesse sair voando o estrago seria menor, mas nem por isso menos
constrangedor. Haveria um levante e talvez uma caça instintiva e coletiva aquele ser
asqueroso, o que também acabaria com o clima de encantamento que estávamos
conseguindo criar até aquele momento.


Não me perguntem como,
nem por quais conexões cerebrais cheguei a isso, mas, numa manobra arriscada e
com pouquíssimas chances de dar certo, olhei para a plateia que continuava
com os olhos grudados na tela, e quando a coisa já estava no ombro do sujeito e
deu uma paradinha pra tomar fôlego, não tive dúvida: armei o dedão e o dedo do
meio em forma de catapulta, acelerei em direção ao cliente, passei por trás
dele e dei um peteleco certeiro no bicho arremessando-o contra a parede no
canto da sala. A precisão foi tal que o cliente sequer sentiu o contato do meu
dedo com o seu ombro.


Nem ele nem ninguém
naquela sala tomou conhecimento do que acabara de acontecer, entretidos que
estavam com a apresentação.


Missão cumprida? Não...com
o rabo do olho vi que o baratão depois de se estatelar contra a&nbsp;parede ficou caído de costas, debatendo-se
para voltar ao ataque. Não tive dúvida, dei mais uma volta na mesa e,
passando novamente por trás do cliente, estiquei o pé e sem dó esmaguei a coisa
sobre o carpete. Só depois de ouvir aquele barulhinho crocante, como se tivesse
acabado de pisar num baconzitos, tive certeza de que estava um a zero pra mim.
E pude assim, terminar a apresentação.


Juro
que fiquei tão atônito com a performance, que por um bom tempo não consegui
contar aquilo pra ninguém. Só depois que soube do resultado da concorrência e a
gente ganhou a conta.







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