Esse cara (transpirando no ônibus) sou eu
Autor: Breno Pessoa | Publicado: 2013-03-08T16:40:00-03:00

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Me sinto uma senhora gorda no ápice da menopausa sempre que pego ônibus para ir pro trabalho. Um surto de calor acompanhado de irritação e desejo suicida invade o meu corpo logo após passar da catraca, fazendo do pequeno trajeto uma experiência suarenta de quase morte.Sei que tem gente que passa horas em ônibus e à primeira vista pareço privilegiado por gastar no máximo uns vinte minutos de viagem, mas minha dor também tem razão de ser. Afinal, mesmo que por um tempo menor, encaro aperto, calor, sovacos horrendos expostos de maneira quase pornográfica, vômito de criança e evangélicos vendedores de canetas que agradecem a Jesus pela glória alcançada (abandono das drogas, geralmente crack) etc.Música desagradável também é uma constante nas viagens. Alguns ônibus contam com sistema de som, muitas vezes sintonizados em rádios evangélicas (novamente eles), cujos cânticos de louvor e pregação reforçando o aspecto de penitência que é estar naquele lugar horrível. Igualmente incômodos são os passageiros que usam os alto-falantes dos celulares no máximo, geralmente tocando funk ou algum gênero inclassificável com temática sexual, sobretudo sobre “novinhas” (sendo justo, há também canções a respeito de pessoas que supostamente atingiram a maioridade) e bregas sobre questões semelhantes. Menção honrosa para os músicos amadores dos coletivos, cujo repertório é geralmente uma versão triste dos piores momentos da programação Nova Brasil FM.Hoje o sistema de som do ônibus estava sintonizado numa rádio comum e tocava Esse Cara Sou Eu. Uma senhora do meu lado comentou que “esse cara assim não existe” e perguntou se eu concordava com afirmativa dela. Eu não soube responder, mas acho que ela esperava que eu respondesse que esse cara sou eu.&nbsp;