Silêncio.
Autor: Emanoelle baeta | Publicado: 2010-10-24T16:47:00-07:00

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Pensei ter sido prudente quando em silêncio não respondi às tuas ofensas e acusações, quando não reclamei os meus direitos, quando deixei a Deus a defesa de minha honra. Mas só entendi o que te fiz passar quando o silêncio, ontem à noite, me disse verdades terríveis. O silêncio não é dado a amenidades. Esse telefone mudo. O enorme intervalo entre o tic e o tac. Lembrei de uma situação onde nenhum de nós dois abriu a boca. Silêncios que falaram sobre desinteresses, esquecimentos, recusas. Quantas coisas foram ditas na quietude, depois de uma discussão. O perdão que não vinha nem um beijo, nem uma gargalhada para acabar com o clima de tensão. Só ele permanecia imutável, o silêncio, a ante-sala do fim. É mil vezes preferível uma voz que diga coisas que não quero ouvir, pois ao menos as palavras que são ditas indicam uma tentativa de entendimento. Palavras proferidas articulam argumentos, expõem suas queixas, jogam limpo. Já o silêncio arquiteta planos que não são compartilhados. Quando nada é dito, nada fica combinado. Quantas vezes, durante uma discussão te ouvi falar: “Diz alguma coisa, mas não fica aí parado me olhando!” É o silêncio de um mandando más notícias para o desespero do outro. O silêncio que perturba é aquele que fala. E fala alto. É quando ninguém bate à nossa porta, não há toques e nem mensagens no celular e mesmo assim sinto a presença dos fantasmas e entendo a mensagem. Agonizando ao sabor da minha venenosa auto-estima confesso que, queria estar contigo pra pedir perdão. E se achares necessário, também perdoar. Porque quem pede perdão mostra que ainda acredita no amor. Quem perdoa mostra que ainda existe amor para acreditar. Perdoar é o modo mais sublime de crescer e pedir perdão é a maneira mais pura de se erguer... De uma queda que poderia ser o fim. Recomeçar e tentar fazer tudo da forma certa. Sentir primeiro, pensar depois. Perdoar primeiro, julgar depois. Amar primeiro, questionar depois. Esquecer primeiro, se vingar depois. Chorar primeiro, sorrir depois. Viver primeiro, morrer depois.