Como os ruandeses enfrentam o horror de 1994 (Tradução - parte 1)
Autor: fabiana jardim | Publicado: 2014-04-06T16:59:00-03:00

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(Texto de Lauren Wolfe, originalmente publicado aqui.
A tradução, apressada, é minha e como o texto é muito longo para um único post,
vou publicando em cinco partes, seguindo a divisão do próprio original. O dia
seis de abril marca os vinte anos do início do genocídio ocorrido em Ruanda).



Consolee Nishimwe tem um riso nervoso e utiliza
certas frases reiteradamente quando conversamos: "dor",
"doloroso", "não foi nem um pouco fácil", "eu tinha
somente 14 anos". Tendo em mente o que ela suportou em 1994, durante o
genocídio de Ruanda, algumas dessas frases possivelmente não expressam
completamente [o vivido]. Nishimwe, hoje com 34 anos e morando em Nova Iorque, diz que pode descrever os acontecimentos que a levaram até ali, porém não sem
dificuldades.



"Em nossa cultura, não falamos muito sobre
experiências", diz Nishimwe, que é uma figura pública
a falar sobre o conflito. "Leva um tempo longo para expressar como nos
sentimos. Estou tentando mostrar a outros sobreviventes que precisamos
expressar a dor que temos".



Hoje, vinte anos depois de um genocídio
etnicamente motivado em que aproximadamente um milhão de ruandeses morreram e
em que mais que um milhão de mulheres foram estupradas, o governo proíbe certas
formas de discussão pública a respeito de Hutus e Tutsis.Quando visitei o país
em fevereiro, ouvi bastante conversas sobre algo chamado "Visão
2020", que deveria transformar o país em um estado próspero, marcado por
boa governança e economia saudável. A construção [civil] está explodindo na
capital, Kigali, e o presidente Paul Kagame expressou o desejo de tornar seu
país mais parecido com Cingapura - uma espécie de democracia autoritária. Em
outras palavras, há um esforço considerável para deliberadamente "ir
adiante" em relação à tragédia - uma determinação a nunca mais perder o
controle.



No entanto, o que os ruandeses enfrentaram foi
tão extraordinariamente horrível - em termos de quantas pessoas sofreram ou
testemunharam atos brutais, e a escala absoluta e veloz da matança - que quanto
mais tempo em ficava no país e conversava com Nishimwe e outros, mais eu me
perguntava como tal lugar poderia "ir adiante" após o que aconteceu
naqueles terríveis cem dias entre abril e julho. Como cada pessoa sobreviveu?
Como sobrevive um país inteiro empurrado ao pesadelo hediondo de pessoas
talhadas até a morte e estupradas e torturadas? Como é viver em uma sociedade
em que praticamente todo mundo com mais de&nbsp; vinte anos tem memórias de
tais feitos inumanos?

Considere que quinze por cento das crianças ruandesas foram forçadas a se
esconder embaixo dos mortos para sobreviver.



Considere que noventa por cento dessas crianças acreditaram que iriam
morrer.



Considere que Nishimwe ainda não usa saias porque ela não quer mostrar as
cicatrizes em suas pernas, feitas pelo homem que as entalhou enquanto a
estuprava - ou as marcas que o HIV deixou pelo seu corpo.



Considere que seus três irmãos - Philbert, 9 anos; Pascal, 7; e Bon-Fils, 18
meses - foram cortados em pedaços e jogados no buraco infecto de sua casa
queimada, enquanto Nishimwe estava por perto, com sua mãe, no dia nove de maio
de 1994. Seu pai já havia sido morto nas primeiras semanas do genocídio, no dia
15 de abril.



E então considere a resposta que Nishimwe me deu quando perguntei a ela como
sobreviveu: "Houve outros para quem as coisas foram piores", ela
disse.



Esta frase, "foi pior para outros" - eu a ouvi muitas vezes de
outros sobreviventes ruandeses. É difícil compreender como alguém que passou
por múltiplos eventos traumáticos em um curto período pode pensar que sua
experiência não é tão ruim quanto a que outros viveram.



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“Ficaremos sem fôlego ao entender que
eles têm a capacidade de escapar da atrocidade com essa noção bastante modesta
de que foi pior para outros", disse Frank Ochberg, psiquiatra na
Universidade do Estado de Michigan e pioneiro no campo da terapia de trauma.
"O exemplo ruandês é de resistência". Mas só porque persistiram, não
quer dizer que os ruandeses estejam vivendo suas vidas livres de dor.