Question: IN: Boko Haram bombs Maiduguri in north-east Nigeria killing 20 people
Boko Haram has attacked the north-eastern Nigerian city of Maiduguri with explosions and a suicide bombing that witnesses said killed as many as 20 people.

The attack began in the early hours of Tuesday morning when residents were woken by explosions, heavy gunfire and the screech of a fighter jet scrambling to protect the area.

“We are under siege,” Sumaila Ayuba, her voice shaking, told the Associated Press by telephone just after midnight from her home on the city’s western edge. “The shooting is quite deafening. Please, we need prayers.”

Hours later, a man blew himself up at Gamboru cattle market, according to witnesses who spoke on condition of anonymity for fear of reprisals. One said he counted at least 20 bodies.

More than 30 people died in attacks over the weekend.

Boko Haram’s six-year-old uprising aimed at imposing sharia law across Nigeria has killed 13,000 people and driven 1.5 million from their homes.

President Muhammadu Buhari announced at his inauguration on Friday that he was moving the military headquarters of the war from Abuja, the capital in central Nigeria, to Maiduguri. The capital of Borno state is also the birthplace of the extremist Islamist group and the biggest city in north-eastern Nigeria.

Buhari, a retired major general who was briefly a military dictator in the 1980s, was set to hold his first meeting with military chiefs on Tuesday, amid speculation that there will be changes in the war against Boko Haram.

On Wednesday he will travel to Chad and Niger, whose troops help fight Boko Haram, said his spokesman, Garba Shehu. It is Buhari’s first official trip outside Nigeria. Chad and Niger complained of a lack of cooperation with the previous administration.

Hit-and-run attacks on villages and bombings are continuing, weeks after the military announced that a multinational offensive had forced Boko Haram from the towns and villages where it had declared an Islamic caliphate.
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OUT: Residents ‘under siege’ as Islamist rebels attack city in Borno state with suicide bomb, explosions and gunfire


IN: Let’s see how well you know your turkey
This is always a difficult column to write. Some years I go with the standard — yet heartwarming — “Americans have it great and should be thankful” type of column. But all of us know that too many people in this country don’t have it that good.

Other years I opt to concentrate on Black Friday, the shopping day after the holiday that can only be described as the antithesis of Thanksgiving. I started calling it Thanksgetting because it is all about people who already have a lot going sleepless to hit the midnight sales so they can get more.

Last year I told a touching tale about immigration and why so many people want to come to America — apparently so they too can enjoy Thanksgetting. Because of my pro-immigration stance, I ate last year’s meal while being bombarded by emails.

But this year is going to be different.

Because of the election, the economy, health care and a lot of other weighty issues, I’m tired of the way-too-serious stuff. So I’m going for something lighter in tone but very caloric — a turkey quiz.

Get out your drumsticks and pound these questions.

Question 1: The first Turkey Trot … A. Was run in Buffalo in 1896. B. Was bet on by American colonists in 1777. Two Tom turkeys competed against one another and the loser was served for dinner. C. Happened when Native Americans ate a bad bird and got the runs. D. Who the hell cares, I’m watching football.

Question 2: Why do “Buffalo wings” recipes use chicken and not turkey? A. Really, I’m trying to watch the game and you’re asking stupid questions. B. Turkeys can fly at 55 mph and that makes their wings tough. C. A guy named Frank had too many chicken wings one day and had to get rid of them, so he invented the spicy recipe. D. Chickens volunteered for the job because they thought nobody would pay to eat their scrawny wings.

Question 3: Why are they called “turkeys”? A. Because of all the stupid things the birds do, leading some to exclaim, “What a turkey!” B. Because some people believe the birds had flown over here from Turkey, the country. These were the same people who misnamed Native Americans as “Indians.” C. Because the birds, first discovered during Hernan Cortez’s expedition to Mexico in 1519, were brought back to England, where they were sold by merchants who came from Turkey. D. Nobody knows and nobody cares. Watch the game.

Question 4: If you are deep-frying a turkey, you should … A. Have your head examined. B. Have your head examined and your homeowners’ insurance increased. C. Have your head examined, your homeowners’ insurance increased and bump up your life insurance. D. Have the phone number of a caterer handy.

Question 5: What goes good with turkey? A. A delicate pinot noir. B. An airy zinfandel. C. A beautiful beaujolais. D. A nice juicy steak.

Question 6: How to best enjoy turkey? A. Have a kids’ table in a different house. B. Make someone else cook it. C. Get one “free” from the supermarket with a $1,000 purchase. D. Try to catch one of the birds that terrorize people in South Beach on Staten Island.

Question 7: Do you stuff a turkey or does a turkey stuff you? A. Just watch the game and don’t bother me with existential questions. B. First you stuff it, then it stuffs you, but you get to live a little longer. C. Please write a normal column next year, or D. Really, John, I’ll stuff my fist down your throat.

Question 8: Can you keep a turkey as a pet? A. That depends on how hungry your teens get. B. Not if your dog is bigger than the bird. C. Why would you want to when there are snakes for that? D. Yes, there’s even a website called petturkeys.com that’ll give you one if you promise to keep it out of the oven.

Question 9: Turkey is better than chicken because … A. It has more protein and less fat. B. They are easier to catch. C. The leftovers in your fridge make you look more affluent. D. No supermarket ever gave out a free chicken.

Question 10: Will John be doing another turkey column next Thanksgiving? A. 2017 is the year of desserts. B. Hopefully he’ll hit Lotto and won’t have to work anymore. C. Not if Chick-fil-A has anything to say about it. D. CluckU, he will if he wants to.

Everyone, enjoy your meal. If you got at least 6 out of 10 right, you don’t have to do the dishes.

Answers: 1. A 2. C — Frank Bellissimo ordered too many wings, so his wife, Teressa, came up with the sauce in 1964. 3. C 4. All of the above 5. D 6. All, except D, which is too dangerous 7. B,C,D. A if you want to get nasty. 8. D 9. All of the above 10. Who cares!
What is a short summary of the above article?

OUT:
Answer: Happy Thanksgiving! This is always a difficult column to write. Some years I go with the standard — yet heartwarming — “Americans have it great and should be thankful” type of column. But all of us…