Question: Problem: What would be an example of an negative review?

Answer: I'm surprised how well this deli is reviewed... I've given it about 5 chances now.  It always looks promising, and is right next door to the Jewish bakery which I love.  Unfortunately, I've been pretty let down each time I've tried to grab some good food from Scott's.  The service is terrible, at least for take-out.  They take their time and acknowledge you if they feel like it.  I don't know about dine-in service, but you can tell having a smile would get a waitress fired.  As for the food... potato knishs looked outstanding, tasted like something you could buy frozen.  Bagels were okay but I had the bar raised.  Scallion cream cheese left a lot to be desired, which is sad because I consider a good everything bagel with scallion cream cheese to be the ultimate new york breakfast treat (after a good egg sandwich, of course).  Damn, the egg sandwich was awful that one time... did they get their bacon from Wendy's?  Still looking for a good NY deli, so feel free to pass one on!  Wish it could have been Scott's.


Problem: What would be an example of an negative review?

Answer: No, just.... no.  I've heard other locals sing the praises of this place for years, but my return to this place was filled with nothing but regret.  'You ordered wrong - you have to try their burritos!" -- "not all stores are the same, you have to go to a good one!" -- "It's really good if you are drunk!" -- are just some of the qualifiers I was offered as to why people like this place, but whatever they are currently calling themselves, be it Roberto's, or their increasingly appearing new moniker of "Don Tortaco" (believe me, the menu, decor, and food are identical), these places are the lowest common denominator of food.  Last week I caved in to the pressure and decided to try their burritos - as reported, they weren't as wet and revolting as some of their other offerings, decent for the price, but then my wife and I both became violently ill and suffered stomach cramps (and you can imagine the rest) for the rest of the weekend.  Sure, Roberto's/Don Tortaco might be "great if you're drunk", but people do a lot of stupid things when they are intoxicated, and that's no reason to recommend these activities on Yelp.  Stay away.


Problem: What would be an example of an positive review?

Answer:
Answer: Gates and Brovi has struck a perfect balance here. This is WIsconsin supper club meets New England seafood shack.  It's a great twist for Madison, anchored by rock solid food and drink.  We went there following a Badgers game and were treated to excellent casual fare.  The shrimp fritters were crisp on the outside and had a great slightly chewy texture within.  The sandwiches were delicious, especially the Parmann with the special sauce.  Fried chicken was crispy and perfectly cooked.  The oysters were clean and cold and well-priced, though not as good a deal as the Sardine happy hour.  Gates and Brovi is a welcome addition to this neighborhood.  The room is made up of magnificent reclaimed wood that has fashioned a beautiful bar, ceiling, and tables. It will fit well within the offerings already on Monroe St.  It will surely prosper though, being the only place near the end of Monroe St.    I can't wait to get back.