Fathers' Day is an English movie released on 10 August, 1997. The movie is directed by Ivan Reitman and featured Mel Gibson as lead characters.
These circumstantial occurrences during sex can happen to you as well. Here are some tips to help you...
Almost every couple has suffered from the occasional not-so-sexy moves which end up turning off the respective partners in bed. But what about the accidental bummers which often happen in the midst of your steamiest sex sessions? From suddenly being compelled to answering nature's call or moaning your past lover's name, these sex shockers are irksome distractions that do not allow you to enjoy the act of passion whole-heartedly.
These circumstantial occurrences during sex may not be very common, but these can happen to you as well. So the next time you find yourself in these embarassing situations, just take a count of the following points...
Imagine screaming your ex's name, or your secret lover's pet name, just when your partner is about to climax. Damn! It can't get worse than this. "I had an arranged marriage and it was a blunder that I did on my honeymoon. I yelled my ex's name in pleasure and my hubby was very frustrated hearing another man's name. Believe me, we didn't have sex for months, until I convinced him that there's nothing between me and my ex now," shares Deepti Shah (31), who got married last year.
Hot tip: Though fantasies are an essential part of a gratifying sex life, expressing fantasies in such unexpected ways can often put end to your relationship. "A lot of women fantasise about their idol or a past lover while having sex as it turns them on. But it's important to remember that sex is an emotional experience too, so don't appear to be emotionally weak and let your past lover/fantasy hover in your mind space while becoming intimate with your present beau. This causes a discord in your relationship. A combination of prayanam, gym and a job (PGJ) is the best way to keep away from a fertile imagination," suggests Dr. Aruna Broota, clinical psychologist.
This blooper is the mother of all sex bummers faced by couples. Often confused with a squirting orgasm, it is related to the pressure applied on the bladder due to sexual stimulation. A problem commonly faced by women, this often leaves the male partner feeling half pleasured. Recalls housewife Pratibha Trivedi, "I often feel like urinating half way through the act and this creates a problem for my man, besides being unhealthy."
Hot tip: Never force yourself to reach a climax if you're feeling like relieving yourself. "The nerves that are stimulated during an erection are quite close to those of the urinal bladder and sometimes an overlapping can result in urinating during sex. So make sure you have attended nature's call before you gear up for the act of sex. In case there are any other organic problems, certain medications can help deal with them," elucidates Dr. Prakash Kothari, a leading sexologist.
It may sound like a marginal interruption, but if it comes in the way of pleasure, it's sure to marr the excitement. "It was a horrifying nightmare. I knew my wife had medical implications due to which she suffered gastritis, but it was a highly disturbing when we were sexually engaged and I stopped enjoying sex with her anymore," recalls Ravi Mehra.
Hot tip: Make sure your digestive system is in place before you indulge in a make out session. "Avoid potatoes, pulses, peas, and bakery items that enhance gas formation (gastritis). Also, we recommend you to consume a digestive pill or opt for a brisk walk after the meal to make the food settle down completely," recommends Dr. Kothari.
Nailed Many couples often, although unintentionally, end up scratching each other's bodies with their sharp nails. It may be an act of pleasure for you, but your partner might not be enjoying the pain as much. "I hate girls with long nails and unfortunately my wife has the same trait, it is a misery. Every time we have sex, I am with red deep marks on my back and neck, which are at times visible. Come on, how can this be a loving gesture?" questions Yatin Chawla.
Hot tip: The simplest way out of this situation is to cut properly file and manicure your nails so that they do not lead to painful scratches on your partner. Try caressing your partner's body with your soft and well moisturised hands and palms to avoid any contact with your nails. As for biting, make sure your partner is fully excited before you bite their ear, shoulders, neck or any other body part.
"I thought only men enjoy stimulating their private parts. However, when I saw my wife doing it to herself, especially during sex, it wasn't a good feeling at all. Every time I would try to arouse her, she would object and resort to her own way of stimulation," says Keshav Khurana. Such gestures can irk your partner to the fullest and at the same time, distract them from the actual act.
Hot tip: Avoid touching or rubbing your organs repeatedly, let your partner have the privilege to arouse you by touching your erotic zones. "Inflammation or infection in or around the sex organ causes itching, so ensure you wash your body well before having sex. In case of any fungal infection, necessary ointments can be applied. You can also consume anti-allergic medicines a few hours before indulging in sex. This will reduce itching at that time so that you can enjoy uninterrupted pleasure," explains Dr. Kothari.
How would you feel if your partner remained quiet throughout the lovemaking act? Not a great feeling of course! "I often feel that my wife considers sex like a routine chore that doesn't interest her whole heartedly. Neither does she appreciate any act nor does she take the initiative to tell me in case I am going wrong. I just don't enjoy such a one sided intercourse," shares Varun Chhabra.
Acts of holding back your moans and not uttering a word during sexual acts often imparts the impression sex being forced on the silent partner. Once your partner observes this, it'll surely kill his/her mood.
Hot tip: Remember, your partner loves hearing you moaning, screaming and at times shouting, to know that you're having a 'good time'. Don't keep numb during the act. "Communication is the utmost requirement during sex. Discuss things that you like or dislike and what ignites your passion. Women should not be cautious of their expressions or hesitate in guiding their husbands. This educates their partner further," opines Dr. Aruna.
It's a common occurrence to see your partner falling asleep time and again while you're in the mood to rock the boat. But such redundant naps in between sexual interactions often reroute the mood, ruining the sexual chemistry. Kanika Motwani, married for 3 years, complains, "Both of us come home tired and when it's time for sex, my husband loves his sleep more. Forget any foreplay or after sex moments, he sometimes falls off to sleep in between the actual act. It really annoys me."
Hot tip: It's always a wise idea to grab a sound sleep after sex and not let it come in way of seeking pleasure. Go for a shower before you make-out to retain freshness of body and mind.
Omani businessmen, Shura members and the minister agree on keeping the two-year visa ban for expats.
Muscat: Oman’s Minister of Manpower has agreed with Shura Council members that the two-year visa ban should stay.
Two Shura members called on the minister to retain the controversial visa rule during a council session with Sheikh Abdullah bin Nasser Al Bakri, Minister of Manpower.
Currently, expat workers who cannot obtain a No Objection Certificate (NOC) from employers in the country must leave and cannot return for two years. There have been repeated calls to change the law and recently the government announced it is being studied.
“We urge the ministry to keep the two-year visa ban rule to protect Omani business owners of SMEs” Mohammed Al Badi, a Shura member said, while Nasser Al Amri echoed his call.
The Minister of Manpower told council members yesterday: “We have the same opinion about this rule. However, it is directed by the police in cooperation with other authorities.”
Al Bakri was addressing the Shura Council yesterday for a second day of discussions and commented on a range of issues.
“In 10 years, expatriates will make 60 to 65 per cent of Oman population. No one will accept to be a minority in his country,” Shura member Hilal Al Yahyai, told the minister, during a discussion on Omanisation.
Al Bakri added: “Yes, the rate of expats is higher than what we planned for, 30 per cent of population, but that’s due to development requirements of the country and the need of employees in the construction sector which is unattractive to Omanis.”
The minister’s view on retaining the two-year visa ban reflects the mood of many Omani businessmen and at least one member of the Oman’s Chamber of Commerce.
Employing locals just to meet the minimum legal requirement of Omanisation should also be stopped, Shura members urged during the Monday session.
The minister called on business owners to stop “visual Omanisation” and to give real opportunities to nationals to compete in the job market.
Shura member Mohammed Al Junaibi also asked the minister to lift Omanisation rules for companies if the rule had a negative impact.
“We urge your ministry to lift the Omanisation requirement in some companies which can be negatively affected by it,” Al Junaibi said.
But the minister replied that there are 163,000 SMEs in the country which employ only 8,000 Omanis compared to 780,000 expatriates.
During the session, the minister said that 55 per cent of Omanis working in the private sector get less than OMR500 a month.
However, Al Bakri added: “Big business projects coming under Tanfeedh will open job opportunities for Omanis.”
He also announced that his ministry, along with the ministries of tourism, commerce and industry and transport and communications, have all begun the fourth phase of the national programme, Tanfeedh, a national programme to move the Sultanate away from its dependency on oil and gas. The programme also promotes job creation for Omani nationals.
Al Bakri stated that Omanis will soon be able to find managerial posts thanks to the education system’s newest graduates.
“Omanis will get higher positions thanks to the development of the higher education system,” he said. The minister also announced that his ministry will start providing 100 per cent of its services electronically in 2017.
“The vision is to make the shift to an e-government by 100 per cent in 2017. We will see how it goes and we might open or keep a number of offices for offline transactions,” he said.
There are 43,858 Omani job-seekers, the majority of them between 25 and 29 years old, according to 2016 figures released by the minister. Stats show that 36 per cent of them were men and 64 per cent were women.
“This law keeps a worker bonded to the company. If a worker has completed his job contract with a company, he should be allowed to join a new company without any hassles,” the trade unionist said, adding that the International Labour Organisation (ILO) is pushing Gulf countries to remove such systems.
“If we want private sector to flourish in these economic conditions, then such restrictive rules should be lifted. Keeping such rules will have an impact on worker productivity,” the trade unionist added.
A marketing official in a private college in Oman said that the requirement of a no-objection certificate and the two-year visa ban is forcing her to stay at work even though work conditions are not good.
“I wanted to move to other institutions. Even though I had completed my job contract, I was denied the NOC. Without a NOC, I will face a two year visa ban. I will try to adjust, but if not, I will leave Oman for good soon,”the marketing official said.
In November, Ahmed Al Hooti, a member of Oman Chamber of Commerce and Industry, said that the NOC should stay but with certain clauses. “If we scrap it totally, workers will jump from one company to another, posing a threat to his previous company. He can even start a business and become a threat to his previous employers. So, NOC should stay,” the OCCI member said.
“However, if somebody has put forward a genuine reason to move to a new firm, after completing his two-year job contract, he should be given the NOC. He should not be held back and placed in trouble,” the OCCI member added.
To those who have been praying for us, thank you. After searching for a permanent call for almost 5 years, your prayers have been answered. I received word on Sunday that First Christian Church of Roswell, NM (please, no redundant alien jokes), voted overwhelmingly to extend a call to me so that I may be their next pastor. We have been in contact with this church since early September and went to visit them in early October.
First Christian Church is the second oldest church in Roswell, and has been on the decline for a number of years. They were a part of the Disciples of Christ denomination when they began, but as that denomination drifted to the left theologically, FCC drifted right. FCC left the DoC about 15 years ago and they have continued to pursue the scriptures in order to be true to what the word of God says.
In that process, they began to sense that they should pursue looking into becoming a part of the PCA. That is where I come into the picture. In early September, Dominic Aquilasent me their information and asked if I were interested. You bet! (The elders contacted Dominic because they have mutual friends in the PCA). I really was excited about the prospect from the get go and sent my resume and MDF to the search committee immediately.
What was about the church that got me excited? I think part of it was that they were non-denominational and looking to come into the PCA. They were also going through Embers to a Flame, which is a church-revitalization ministry out of Birmingham, AL. I’ve taken two churches through Embers and neither one has followed up with Fanning the Flame, which is very helpful in church revitalization. I’m not sure they will follow through with FTF, but it helps that they see that God is not through with them yet and that they have the hope of God’s hand in their lives.
I am also excited because they have a hunger for the word of God. Not just to know more about God’s word, but to have God’s word in their lives so that they may be used by the Holy Spirit for God’s glory. This was obvious when I was there earlier in the month. I taught then in Sunday school and preached for them and both times they were truly blessed, as was I.
It really is amazing how God has worked in my life to prepare me for this call. I must confess that about four months ago, I got fed up with looking for churches in my current denomination and just decided to quit looking there all together. What I wanted was not more denominationalism, but a church that has a true desire to seek God’s will and leading in their lives. Please note, that these things are not mutually exclusive. There are a lot of churches in the PCA that are doing just that. The movement of the Spirit was more for me than for the PCA. I felt like God was bringing me to the point of letting go of the PCA in order to prepare me for the next call.
The irony of all this is that this non-denomination church came to my attention through Dominic, who is entrenched in the PCA. FCC is non denominational as I mentioned above. But their desire is to be a part of the PCA. I truly believe God was preparing my heart for this church. I will still be a member of the PCA, working out of bounds. And if and when FCC is ready, they will join the PCA as well.
Joining the PCA is NOT a priority. That is a goal that we will have as church leaders. The main goal is to teach and preach Christ crucified in order to build up the body of Christ for the work of the ministry (Philippians 1:18, Eph. 4:11ff, 2 Cor. 4:5). If we join the PCA, that is icing on the cake. I pray that over the next couple of years, that the congregation comes to the point that they desire to join the PCA and understand all that it entails. Not that there is anything to fear. What I mean is that I hope and pray that the see joining the PCA as a benefit to who they are in Christ, that we will be joining together those who have like minds about the Word of God, His Mission and His purpose with us so that we can work together and carry out the Apostolic mandate found in Ephesians 4 on a grander scale.
However, if we do not get to that point, as long as we are being true to the overall calling of Christ, I will be fine with that as well. What I truly want is a ministry that bears much fruit, and a church that does the same. We may not all be theologically on the same page, or even have the same goals. But if we truly show the love of Christ toward one another, and are seeking His will, then I can certainly live with that. I long to live with that. May He use my desires and theirs for His glory and for the building up of the Kingdom, till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ; 14 that we should no longer be children, tossed to and fro and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, in the cunning craftiness of deceitful plotting, 15 but, speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all things into Him who is the head—Christ— 16 from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by what every joint supplies, according to the effective working by which every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying of itself in love.
That is such great news. Sounds like they have doubly good discernment — leaving the Disciples of Christ (I grew up in that and my parents have been in that “frog soup” of increasingly bad theology for their whole lives) and now they hired you! Looking forward to hearing about what God will do there.
So happy for you! I am encouraged as I read this post. What a work God has been and is doing in you! I know you will be a blessing to the new congregation. When will all of this begin?
I should be heading out next week, and the family will follow during the Christmas break. Since the church is not in the PCA, no need to go through all the committees. 🙂
Congratulations, Timothy! I know you were waiting a long time and probably were often impatient and concerned. Isn’t it great to know that although God may not always be on time, He is never late?