Year: 1872

but II you had seen me when l was a
young married woman Why, if he
did not come home the minute L ex-
pected him, l began to worry and fancy
what might have happened to him, until
IN an hour l would nearly drive myself
frantic. And when he came in cool and
composed, and in reply to my anxious
inquiries gave me some slight reason for
the detention, it fell like ice on my ex-
cited brain, and thought he was cruel
and hard-hearted.


Still got no better of my weakness
until one night-shall ever forget that
night 7 1t cost five hours of suffering,
but | learned the lesson thoroughly.


1t happened thus: John was Free
mason, and went every week to the lodge.
From my windows | could see the row of
lighted windows of the lodge-room, and
when the lights went out, about ten
O'Clock, l began to shut up the house,
and hy the time had finished, John al
ways arrived. Well, that night he left
after tea for the lodge, as usual. 1 got
the baby to bed and sat down to read.
When the clock struck ten, shut up my
book and went to sit by the window to
see when the lights went out in the
lodge.


Soon they vanished, and I went my
,Ouiiio u loOhlllS upi ClOSlllS DlluuS,
bolting doors, and fastening windows.
But John did not come. Then | sat
down by the window again. He must
have stopped to talk at some neighbor's
gate.


The minutes rolled on into half an
hour. Still no John! / began to feel
worried. Could he have fallen and hurt
himself? There was sidewalk, l re-
membered, where boards were taken up
to put in gas-pipes. Could it have been
left, and he had fallen in 1t was not
far off, and almost resolved to go and
see. But there was baby And how
veXed John would be, if nothing had
happened, that / ran after him as though
he was a child No, 1 would wait.


Then neighbor went by who must
have come over the broken walk, and
would certainly have seen him if he was
there; besides, such little fall would
not have stunned him he could have
made himself heard.


Still, the minutes rolled on, and the
clock struck eleven. still sat by my
window waiting. Few went by at that
hour. If 1 caught the sound of a step a
long way off, held my breath and lis
tened until it came nearer, and oh ! how
prayed it might stop at my gate But
no. They all went by to gladden. some
other watching woman's heart, i thought,
and tried to be glad.


Finding myself stiff with cold, l left
the window and repleniShed my fire. |
tried to think of something cheerful. l
tried to think of something that might
have taken him downtown, and |
thought l would not worry until the last
car went up, which was at twelve. 1
tried to sew, but somehow baby's dress
had no interest for me, and there's no aid
to anxious thought like the needle. l
took up the evening paper. The first
item l saw was a brutal murder in our
own city. | turned from it, shuddering,
only to read of suicide and an acciden-
tai drowning.


My blood seemed freezing. 1 threw
away the paper and took up a book. 1t
was one of Poe'S ; and though / was in
terested in the story read, it filed my
mind with horrors.


The clock struck twelve


went to the window again, to listen
for the last car, which ran through the
next street. In a short time it came
numbering along with it's jingling bells.
Opposite our corner it halted, and a
mans step came ringing across the
block. 1t was he, of course, and |
started up to listen for the click of the
gate-latch. But the step went by!


Then a panic seized me. Then I
knew something dreadful had happenedl
Perhaps he had started for town and
walked off the bridge when it was open.
Many people had done so, and some had
been drowned in this very city. He was
always in hurry, too, and never waited
for bridge if he could run over.


But then he could swim


VnG hItt ha 1,oiorl,f hn ,t, I -. ~.
first dash of that horrid river and go
down like lead, as l had heard people did
sometimes! Or, if he did swim, how
could he ever land ? Each side was a
high wall to the docks-nothing to climb
up by, nothing by which to hold on
Perhaps he was there now, hanging
with the grasp of despair to some crack
in the wall! With the thought sprang
to my feet. l walked the floor. cried.
and wrung my hands in my agony.


The clock struck one


If not drowned, he might have fallen.
They were always fixing the streets some
where, and often read of people falling
through and being hurt. In many
places the walks were quite high above
the, ground, as the grade had been raised
and fall through such place was dam
gerous. Or, he might have slipped on
the walk and fallen against the curb
and If somebody picked him up, he might
he senseless and not able to tell his name!
lie might be carried to the station-house
and lie for hours unknown! His clothes
were not marked. could not think of
any way he might be identified He
might be suffering for care. lie might
be lying on some hard bench, or he
might be lying under some sidewalk
dying for want of care


y God how could / stay there and
smother in the house and leave him ont
to his fate? The drops of agony stood
on my face. My fire was long dead. but
was burning with excitement.


The clock struck two


With the sound came a cry of anguish.
Now | had done expecting him He
had never staid out so late-of course
had happened.


What should | dor Should I rouse
the neighbors What should / saw ?
Where should l send them to look 2
the dreadful thought would
he had been struck down
by robber or garroted Perhaps he
lies cold and dead Ona bench in station
house Perhaps thrown into an alley.
put of sight There may be life i'm him
but If not helped, he will surely die or
freeze


.Perhaps-probably-I shall never see
him again alive. o Heaven can it be
That am widow nowp l believe that
thought brought a cry, for my baby woke
frightened. l soothed her to sleep.
though the blood seemed to dance
mad.


If so, what will become of us SIM