Year: 1872




IT was during the Presidential
campaign which resulted in the cleo
ton of Buchanan, that the writer of
the appended sketch. in company
with three other politicians, rode
from Paducah to Boston. Ky, in Il
hack. They were bound for one of
the old fashioned barbecues, and he
tells what happened on the way
thus:


The Joking Judge NJ. was one of
the party. and the bottles that peeped
out from the basket under the seat
seemed to improve the sparkle of his
wit. the flavor Of his jokes, and the
music of his laugh, until the happy
contagion even reached the driver.


Our fun was at its highest when,
turning curve in the road, We saw,
down its hot, dusty stretch, a sollta-
~ OK cart. with its owner perched
npon what proved TO be bags Of corn.
As a kind of advance guard, great,
ugly, brIndle dog came trOttlnS
along in advance. and attracted by
our noise he threw himself IN an
attitude Of defiance. determined to
dispute our advance. With his
savage growI, red eyes and erect
bristles. he indeed presented for
midable appearance. Judge NJ,
could not let such an opportunity for
a practical joke pass. Said he:


TN bet the drinks for the day
that [ can run that dog off the
road"


Done" said we.


Stopping our hack, he got out,
and threw the skirts of his 'swaIlow-
tailed coat over his shoulders,
stuck his old slouch hat on the bac k
of his head. and going down on all
four" he scampered toward the dog
with the most frightful yells, re-
minding one OF the fable of the ass IN
the lions skin. This was too much
for the dog. and bowling with fright,
he took to the brush. The oxen also
saw the fearful monster coming
down the road. and with one wild
below they took to the brush, with
their tails standing straight out be-
hind. Away they went. with wheels
bouncing in the air, bags Of corn
bursting open. and spilling their
contents in 4 continuous drill.


whoa. Blaze, Whoa, Ball. o,
Lordy, what shall [ do:' came
from the frightened man on the cart,
as he was bounding from side to side,
now grabbing a cart-pole, then
catching at bag of corn as it went
over the side.


This kind Of performance couldn't
last without a change for better or
worse, as the oxen went tearing
down the steep bank of a little creek
and overturned everything in the
water. about waist deep. One OK,
getting loose, went up the opposite
bank and soon disappeared, while
the other covered down, plteOusly
believing as we came up to the scene
of disaster. There stood the poor
man in water to his waist, his wagon
overturned. and half the corn soak
ing in the wafer, while the other
half was scattered in the woods. He
looked scared and pitiful and
said:


so. Lordy, stranger, don't never
do that ar any more. I'm ruin
ed!'


It was a splendid success, that
Joke. and there stood the Judge
holding on to a saplinS and laughing
till the tears ran down his checks.


We took up 4 subscription for the
moor fellow. The Judge headed the
list with. an amount nearly covering
the damages. and We added to it
until we left the man in thankfulness
that he had sold his corn so well:
At the barbecue the Judge bet all
his money on alittIe horse race, and
lost. from that, and the effects OF ms
drinks at our expense, we halto carry
him to our hack on bar door. On
his way home he insisted upon stand
ing on his head.


Which was the ruined man?