Year: 1870

And then | resumed with the
President:


Yes, sir, I've been at receptions
before, plenty of them-old Nyes
Ihjun receptions. But they wasn't
as starchy as this by considerable.
No great long strings of highfiyers
like these galoots, here, you know.
but old, high-favored Washoes and
Pi-utes. each one of them as power
ful as rag factory on fire. Phew
Those were halcyon days. Yes, in
deed, General and madam, many
and many's the time, out in the
wilds of Nevada, I've been"


perhaps you had better discon-
tinue remarks till another time,
sir, as the crowd behind you are
growing somewhat impatient" the
President said.


do YOU hear that" said to the
fellow behind me. Il suppose you
will take that hint, anyhow. | tell
You he is milder than / would be.
If | was President, | would waltz
you people out of the back door if
you came crowding a gentleman
this way, that l was holding pri-
vate conversation with"


And then l resumed with the
President:


q think that hint of yours will
start them. | never saw people act
so. 1t is really about all | can do
to hold my ground with that mob
showing up behind. But don't you
worry on my account, General
don't give yourself any uneasiness
about me- can stand it as long as
they can. I've been through this
kind of a mill before. Why, as l
was just saying to you, many and
many time, out in the wilds of Ne
vada, 1 have been at Governor Nye's
Injun receptions-and between you
and me that old man was a good
deal of q Governor, take him all
round. / don't know what for a
Senator he makes, though l think
you'll admit that he and Bill Stew
art and Tom Fitch take q bigger
average of brains into that Capitol
up yonder, by hundred and fifty
fold, than any other State in America
according to population. Now that
is so. Those three men represent
only twenty or twenty-five thousand
people-bless you, the least little
bit of a trifing ward in the city of
New York casts two votes to Neva-
da's one-and yet these three men
haven't their superiors in Congress
for straight-out, simon pure brains
and ability. And if you could just
have been at one of old Nye's Injun
receptions, and seem those savages
not hightiiers like these, you
know, but trowsy old bummers, with
nothing in the world on in the sum-
mer time, but an old battered plug
hat and q pair of spectacles-I tell
you it was swell affair, was one of
Governor Nye's early-day recep-
tions. Many and many's the time
l have been to them, and seen him.
stand up and beam and smile on his
children, as he called them in his
motherly way-beam on them by
the hour out of his splendid eyes,
and fascinate them with his hand
some face, and comfort them with
his persuasive tongue-seen him
stand up there and tell them anec-
dotes and lies, and quote Watts
hymns to them, until he just took
the war spirit all out of them-and
grim chiefs that came two hundred
miles to tax the whites for whole
wagon loads of blankets and things
OF make eternal war if they didn't
get them, he has sent away bewild-
cred with his inspired mendacity
and perfectly satisfied and enriched
with an old hoopskirt or two, a lot
of Patent Office reports, and a few
sides of condemned army bacon
that they would have to chain up to
a tree when they camped, or the
shippers would walk off with them.
| tell you he is a rafting talker.
Talk, It's no name for it. He
well, he is bound to launch straight
into close quarters and heap Of
trouble hereafter, of course-we all
know that-but you can rest salts
fed that he will take off his hat and
put out his hand introduce himself
to the King of Darkness perfectly
easy and comfortable, and let on that
he has seen him somewhere before;
and he will remind him of parties,
he used to know, and things that's
slipped out of his memory-and he
will tell him thousand things that
he can't help taking an interest in,
and every now and then he will just
gently mix in an anecdote that will
fetch him, if there's any laugh in
him-he will, indeed-and jim Nye
will chip in and help cross-question
the candidates, and he will just hang
around and hang around, getting
more and more sociable all the time
and doing this, that, and the other
thing in the handiest sort of way,
till he has made himself perfectly
indispensable-and then, the very
first thing you know"


wheeled and said:


"My friend, your conduct grieves
me to the heart. A dozen times at
least your unseemly crowding has
seriously interfered with the con-
versation l am holding with the
President, and if the thing occurs
again I shall take my hat and leave
the premises"


Il wish to the mischief you would.
Where did you come from, any way,
that you've got the unutterable
check to spread yourself here and
keep fifteen hundred people standing
waiting half an hour to shake hands
with the PRESIDENT"


An officer touched me on the
shoulder and said:


-hoNe dloHS, pledSc, .Sou ic stH-
noying the President beyond all pa
tience. You have blocked the pro-
cession, and the people behind are
getting furious. Come, move along,
please"


Rather than have trouble, moved
along. So had no time to do more
than look back over my shoulder,
and say:


Yes, sir, and the first thing they
would know, jim Nye would have
that place, and the salary doubled! I!