Year: 1873




is it cold up there p This seems,
at first sight; an innocent question
enough. So it is, under some circum-
stances. For my own part, however,
have grown tired of hearing it. This is
not surprising, for have listened to it
great many times. When people adj
dresses it to me they laugh in disa-
greeable sort of manner, as if they saw
joke somewhere. There may be one.
All ] can say is, that have never yet
been able to appreciate the point Of
it.


I may remark that I am tall. I have
always been big for my age. My father
and mother used to say that should
turn out an extraordinary man. They
sent me to school. and I was the big
gest lad there. For time I was very
comfortable. Ny fellows treated me
with marked respect, and some of them
were in the habit of making me pres
ents of bulls'-eyes, taffee and the like.
But by the by change was brought
about. 1t turned out that my size was
considered grievance by some of my
companions, One day passionate lit
tie wretch with red hair woundup dis
pute anent game of three-holes by
hurting sharp-edged stone at my leg,
accompanying the act with the remark
that though was as big as a jaclass I
wasn't going to bully him. I love
peace, otherwise the consequences
might have been serious. The young
gentleman in question presumed on my
leniency, and by and by the others fol-
lowed his pernicious example. I was
shortly the recipient of many challenges
to fight. These felt compelled to de-
cline, and the consequence was was
covered by obloquy. People never
seemed to get the idea out of their
heads that it was positive disgrace for
big fellow like me not to be able to
attack and defend any medium sized
lad at a moments notice.


Sometimes my temper got the better
Of me, and I turned on my compare
lively small antagonists. If they beat
me they were loudly cheered by admir-
ing crowds if I seemed to be thrash
Ing them the crowds took up their
cause, called me brute of fellow, and
acted in such a manner that soon got
more than I bargainea for. All this
was very natural and praiseworthy,
perhaps, but l failed to see the justice
of it.


During my life many people have
tried to make hero of me. I have
frequently, as the saying is, been "put
in the breach" It is, perhaps, ex.
tremely fattering to be called on to up
hold the honors of your companions,
but when you are rather slow in your
movements and have very sensitive
feelings, I am inclined to think that
you pay too dearly for your honor.


Once [ joined a cricket club and play
ed in match. remember that, as I
walked to the wicket, bat in hand, there
was buzz of excitement, and many
opinions were expressed to the effect
that was going to "do it all" People
also advised each other to " look out. "
The first ball that I received was so
awfully swift that 1 never saw it before
I felt it. There was great laugh when
people saw me double up, and some in
dividuals remarked, in tones of intense
satisfaction, that the "big gun" had
got it pretty hot that time. The
second ball got bowled me out. At
once there was howl of derision, and
I walked back to the pavilion amidst
the iee1s of a portion of the great I'M
washed" Other fellows got out in an
equally ignominious manner, but no
particular notice was taken of them.


have run in races once or twice, but
have not won. Those who have watched
the contests have gone nearly mad with
excitement when smaller man than
myself has cleft me standing" as the
phrase is. Ladies have futtered their
fans with joy when, after a desperate
struggle, have been compelled to give
in. In short, in everything that 1 have
attempted have always got the sympa-
thies OF the mob against me. If ever [
had been fortunate enough to achieve
a successful result, I feel that not sin
gle atom of credit would have been ac-
corded me.


1t is said that the public always side
with the weak. Bosh They always
side with the small. I don't complain,
for I want no sympathy. The only
thing I wish is, that people would leave
me in peace. They needn't make a
point of looking pointedly at me as I
pass them in the streets. There is no
reason why they should make very
audible remarks on me as / walk along.
Nor can I see any reason why they
should be constantly expecting me to
do things which I cannot perform, and
which, for the matter of that, would
puzzle most men. I'll admit that I
don't like hard work that, in fact, on
the other hand, I'm fond of taking my
ease. know that I am not calculated
to shine in public, for feel that am
awkward, and not so strong as look.
It takes me all my time to get along.
All that I want, then-all I asks that
people will be kind enough to devote
that attention which they now give me
on their own affairs. If they did this,
/ feel that all parties concerned would
be gamers. At any rate, am certain
that one individual would.


Fear Accompanies Guilt: