smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1876

Just as he has made up his mind that the
turkey has joints in its wings the host asks
him if he thinks the Indians can really be
civilized. The girl next to him laughs,
and he says he will explain his views upon
the subject after dinner. Then he sops
his brow with his handkerchief and presses
the turkey so hard with the fork that it
slides off the dish and upsets a goblet Of
water on the girl next to him. Nearly
frantic he gouges away again at the wings
and gets them off in a mutilated condition
then digs into the breast. Before he can
cut any off the host asks him why he don't
serve out the turkey. Bewildered, he puts
both legs on a plate and hands them to
the maiden lady, and then helps the
young girl TO a plateful of stuffing, and
while taking her plate in return knocks
over the gravy dish. Then he sits down
with the calmneSs of despair and fans him
self with napkin, while the servant clears
up and takes the turkey to the other end of
the table. He doesn't stay to discuss the
Indian question that day. He goes right
home after dinner and spends the night in
trying to decide whether to commit suicide
or take lessons in carving.


Philadelphia Bulletin.
Year: 1876

My camel, writes Carlo correspondent,


was tied down in the sand patiently await
ing his burden. You tie a camel to him


self-that is, when he has shut his legs up
under him like knife blades, you Slip a
leathern bracelet over his knee and there
you have him, for it is impossible for him
to open his leg so long as this bracelet is
around it, binding the leg above the knee
and the shin bone together like a pair of
tongs. OF course it is not easy to find any
thing in the desert to which you may tie
your camel with security; a benefcient
providence has therefore made every camel
his own hitching post, likewise his own els
tern and vegetable market and step-ladder
in fact, the camel is the most complete
machine on four legs that we have knOwl-
edge of. HIS machinery is clumsy and
needs oiling. His great joints show
through his sides, and his tail is the barest
apology ana unworthy of notice. You
would think your camel went on stills, if
you were to start off suddenly, sitting in a
nest of luggage on that high back of his.
You would think he had his feet in poul-
tices, if you were to look at the soft spongy
things as they fall noiselessly on the earth
and spread under his tottering weight.
And that fearful face of his, with its
liquid and pathetic eyes, and those deep
cavities above them, deep enough to hold a
hens egg; his aquiline nose, with its long,


slanting nostrils, that Lshut tight against
the sand storms and the whitening kamSin,


and give very sorrowful expression to the
face; the whole face looks as if it was just
going to cry. The absurd under lip is
puekering and pouting to the most charm
ing extent, and you are not at all surprised
when the beast finally bursts into tears
and cries long and loud, like great over
grown baby. This is the pudding-fOOted
pride of the desert, whose silken hair is
mans raiment, and whose milk is meat and
drink. While my camel was still kneeling
with his strap over his leg, stepped into
the curve Of his neck and went up the
front stairs to the top of his hump. The
saddle was tree of wood with thick rugs
lashed over it. It was little like swing
ing in sawbuck, riding that camel to
Sakkarah. He edged forward over the
desert, putting the two legs on one side of
him forward at the same time, and then
kneeling over and pushing the other side
ahead. 1 was continually rocked back
and forth until my head swung loose on
my shoulders, my sides ached and all my
spine was sore. Many people are seasick
when they mount camel for the first time.
The motion is not unlike that OF small
boat in a chop sea. There is certainly no
pleasure and very little elegance in your
rest as you toss to and fro on the summit of
that animated mountain Of india rubber.
Year: 1876

There is nothing young, unmarried
man likes better than to go to a dinner at
the house Of friend and to be asked to
carve the turkey. He has never carved
a turkey in his life, and with an
old maid on one side, watching him close
ly, and on the other fair girl for whom
he has tenderness, he feels embarrassed
whenhe begins. First he pushes the knife
down towards one of the thigh joints. He
can't find the joint, and he plunges the
knife around in search Of it until he makes
mince-meat out of the whole quarter of the
fowl. Then he sharpens the knife and


tackles it again. At last, while making a
terrific dig, he hits the joint suddenly, and
the leg flies into the maiden's lap, while her
dress front is covered with a shower OF
stufing. Then he goes for the other leg,


and when the young lady tells him he looks
warm, the weather seems to him to sud
denly become 400o warmer. This
leg he finally pulls loose with his fingers.


He lays it on the edge of the platter, and
while he is hacking at the wing he gradu-
ally pushes the leg off on the clean table
cloth, and when he picks it up it slips from
his hand into the gravy dish and splashes
the gravy around for six square yards.
Year: 1876

Governor Dix, in speaking of Gov. Tilden
at the Cooper Institute, on Tuesday eve
ming, Oct. Bird, said:


s'Fellow-citizens, it would be an unhap-
DIV day for him, as well as for the country,
If he were elevated to the Presidency; for
we're he disposed to do right, he has none
OF the Qualities which fit man in great
emergencies to meet them with promptness
and deliberation. You are,
no doubt, aware that he is at this moment
prosecuted by two railroad corporations for
moneys which they accuse him Of fraudu-
lently withholding from them-one suit for
S240, 900, and the other for $50, 900. These
suits were brought long before he was NOM
mated for the Presidency, with no sinister
object, but with confident belief on the
part of the directors of those corporations
that he had fraudulently appropriated to
his own use enormous sums to which he has
no title. 1t is the first time in our history
that the integrity of a candidate for the
Presidency has been thus impugned, and
l trust that the result of the election will
be so decisive that it will be the last.
There is another accusation of a graver
character, which an abortive attempt has
been made to explain-that of defrauding
the Government by false return of his
income. wish, for the honor of the coun-
try, that he could have shown it to be un-
founded To his numberless disqualified
tions for the high Office to which he has
been nominated, it is deeply to be depIlored
that we could not have been spared the
modification, as American citizens. of see
ing superadded this last act OF dishonesty
with which he is charged. Intense preju-
dice may blind political partisans, but |
cannot conceive how any disinterested man
can give him vote.


Caleb Cushing recently remarked to a
New York Tribune reporter that he did
not feel that he ought to comment very
freely on current politics after an absence
of three years from the country. He
thought the aspect of the campaign would
probably change before election day. He
had been a Republican and saw no reason
for changing his political faith or Joining
Tilden's followers. He had never been
personally acquainted with Governor Hayes
but was very complimentary in expressing
the estimate he had formed of his personal
integrity and political sagacity. Cushing
said this country's affairs with Spain are
now OF a satisfactory character.
Year: 1876

bank notes which are redeemable in gold on
demand" The second section provides that
''every contract or obligation made or implied,
and payable within this State, and made or
implied after January 1, 1879, and payable in
dollars, but not In a specified kind of dollars,
shall be payable in United States coin."


Gov. Tilden signed that bill and made it the
law of the State, as it now stands in full force.
He has thus provided that after January l.,
1879, every taxpayer in New York must pay
his taxes and every debtor must pay his debts
in gold, or in national notes redeemable in
gold, which amounts to the same thing. And
now, after imposing this absolute and peremp-
tory requirement upon the people of New
York, he and his party openly declare them
selves against, and vote to repeal, the United
States law which provides that the United
States Government shall redeem its notes in
gold on and after January |, 1879.


That is, Governor Tilden compels the tax
payers and debtors of this State to pay in
gold, and at the same time does all he can to
leave them no way of obtaining the gold by
striking down the Federal law which requires
the United States Government to furnish gold.
He compels the taxpayers and debtors of this
State to pay, If not in gold, then in national
notes redeemable in gold ,and at the same time
assails and tries to overthrow the Federal law





to make its notes thus redeemable in gold. He
compels the taxpayers and debtors of this
State to pay in gold or gold notes, at whatever
premium gold may be, while he would leave
the Government and people of the country at
large TO pay in deprecated and irredeemable
paper.


The provision that call taxes" and ''every
contract" within this State must be paid in
gold or gold notes is positive and unqualified.
If the United States resumption law stands,
| then gold and gold notes will be the regular
currency, and there will be no difficulty In the
| payment. If it does not stand, then taxpayers
| and debtors must go into Wall street and buy
gold at whatever high figure this sudden and
large demand may create. And yet Governor
Tilden and his party, while thus compelling
the people of New York to pay in gold, at the
same time aim their deadly blows at the re-
| sumption law which provides the means!
Such is the amazing position in which Gov
| ernor Tilden places himself by his betrayal of
principle and surrender to the repudiationsts
"a position utterly disgraceful to himself and
| disastrous to the people. Not one word can
his supporters say in defense. There is no es-
cape. Such an attack as Mr.. Tilden makes
upon the public honor, after signing such a
law in this State, is not merely fragrant
piece of demagogism, but crime against the
peOple,
Year: 1876

1t is a well-known fact that international
law prohibits the payment for the use and
occupation, for the ravages Of war and for
property taken as military necessity ex-
cept quartermaster and commissary stores.
This rule was adopted by Congress and by
the Southern Claims Commission. The
Committee on War Claims in both the
House and the Senate have scrupulously
stood by this rule, refusing to even consider
claims not within it, and it has not been
broken until the late session, although
most persistent efforts have been made to
secure its relaxation. 1t was reserved for
the ex-Confederate House to break over
this established precedent and to
ignore laws recognized by all nations.
There are now nearly thirteen hundred
such cases before the House Committee on
War Claims These claims include every
thing except perhaps charges for the use
ofwater from running streams. The Re
public magazine shows that one hundred
and sixty nine of these claims average
$11 600 each. At this average the amount
required to pay the bills now before Con-
gress would be nearly $4,000, 600, and
this would be but drop in the bucket if
the principle that such claims are to be
paid is once recognized. The very
smallest calculation made Is that
over $500, 100000 would be re-
quired to pay the claims of this class,
and the probabilities are that the amount
would be more than double these figures.
Mr.. Riddle, of Tennessee lately introduced
a bill in the House which provides that the
Secretary of War shall pay all such claims
in the same manner and under the same
regulations that compensation is now made
for quartermaster stores for the army. No
proof of loyalty is required, and the affidavit
of the claimant and the evidence of one
reputable citizen is all the proof that is
needed. Could the economical ex Confede-
rate House make this bill law it would
appropriate between five hundred and one
thousand millions of dollars. or course
the Republican Senate would under no cir,
cumstances pass such bill, nor would q
Republican President sign it; but should
Mr. Tilden become President by the votes
of the Southern States he would not hest
tate to do so. The ex-Confederates intend
to continue these demands, hoping in time
to obtain power, when the country will be
at once taxed to pay this class of claims.
How do the loyal men of the country like
the idea of paying for the damage done to
the plantations of the Wade Hamptons,
Buffers, Pillows and other rebels Of the
South?
Year: 1876

JAMES H. PRICE is the name of young
Georgian to whom credit is given by the
Southern Democracy for having captured
and taken prisoner during the late war
General Rutherford B. Hayes. At the time
referred to General Hayes was not mem
Der of the command at and near Peters
burg where the alleged capture is said to
have occurred, and in short, was many
miles away from that locality, doing good,
effective and victorious service for the
Union arms. Price and his friends will
have to try again, and next time, if they
would succeed, they must select better
pOsted witnesses
Year: 1876

WADE HAMPTuN'S record is printed else
where Like that of Tilden and that of
Hendricks, ii is replete with incidents com
mending him to the Confederate Doughface
Democracy and at the same time disgusting
to lOYal Republicans.
Year: 1876

tions have already been bestowed upon
another. For this insult be is challenged by
81. Br!s, a character which was admirably aE-
sumed by Mr.. Comfy. BE possesses fee
bass voice, which will always be heard with
pleasure in Richmond.


Mr.. Peakes as Marcel was enthusiastically
welcomed and sang with greater feeling and
effect as be realized how many of his old
friends were there to greet him. The
rest of the company sang very well. It Is
needless to continue the plot further except
TO say that Marcel, Raoul, and Valentine are
finally attacked By murderers, and killed,
and their bodies taken from the stage.


The costuniDg of the opera is simply
grand, and the entertainment went off de.
lightfully. The chorus is full and rich, and
the orchestra Is perhaps the best that accom-
panies any company. But one thing is want.
ing to make the audience near the doors
more comfortable, and that is the expulsion
OF the peanut. eaters, who insist upon break.
ing the shells at the most critical points in
the opera. Peanut.eaters ought not to go
to operas, or if they do they ought to do
their eating before the opera begins. We
hope this warning will he sufficient.


To night will be the event of the season,
on which occasion the Marriage OF Figaro
will be sung.
Year: 1876

TAXING CHURCH PRoPERTY.-The Occa-
dent, of California, says OF church taxation :


We live in Il State in which all kinds OF
property are taxed once, and some kinds
twice. Our churches and our institutions
of learning have to pay taxes on all they
possess. 1t was not always so here. We
dreaded while we favored the change. We
have found it far less Onerous than we anti
cipated. No church has been ruined by it.
No church has been seriously crippled by it.
We have come TO enjoy the sense Of giving
the public its dues, and asking no fayors.
Our churches feel that they are nearer than
ever before to the Injunction, "Owe no man
anything" And they are tinding that their
moral power is far mere increased than their
treasures are diminished.


There was, Of course, fitness in exemp-
ton of church property from taxation as
long as the church was established by the
State, and belonged to the State, in some
sense; as ii would be useless for the State to
tax its own property and come out in debt
for the cost of collecting it. But there is no
such fitness now, and the fact of the eXemp-
ton OF such property looks somewhat like 4
remnant of the old system.
Year: 1876

limited extent. In these hairless


spaces the skin wore a muddy appear


ance, aud looked so tough that no;


thing short of the teeth of tigei


could make any impression in it.


This said dogs ears had both been


gnawed off irregularly around the


edges, and being pretty well used up,
gave him no very prep0ssessing ia
cial appearance. Beneath h 3 under
jaws, on either side, there hung a


long, loose piece of hairless skin,
somewhat indicative of age. His
head was destitute of hair in many
places, and his hide wore the same
dark or, rather lead -colored muddy
appearance as on its body. His nose
was rather short, his face broad, and
his upper lip had natural tendency
to snarl. especially when any other
dog came near him. Now, this dog
of dogs fi,is representative dog of a
class, strplled about the market at
his leisure, seized what he could, and
when veil supplied appeared to
walk off with the air of cohtentment.
But not Satisfied with his i'll natured
and overbearifs manners toward his
companions, he seemed to have no
regard for anybody, and sprawled
himself right down in the principal
walk. and carelessly fell Unto
drowsy, dreamy state, apparently I'M
conscious of the hustle all about
him, and seeming to say, "Well, no
one dare step on me, anyway, or !
will bite" And so every one gave him
a wide berth. and l was utterly dis
gusted with the hideous and disa-
greeable creature, and came away
thinking he seemed almost human.


TuEAMANNER OF EATING


Among the Kanakas is almost shock
ing to our ideas Of usage and pro-
priety. Around the cities and vii
lagos, and where they can get it,
they will eat meat and bread, but
their staple food is poi and raw fish.
The poi is made of the tarO root.
which grows like a turnip, with a
calla lily top, and in muddy patch,
and is pounded up fine and put into
a large calabash to ferment. 1t has
rootish taste and is somewhat sour.
The natives mix it with water, and
then whole family will squat
around the calabash in the center of
the room. Before eating they some
times rinse the fingers with water.
The way saw woman do this one
morning was by taking mouthful of
water out of small calabash, then
squirting it out of her mouth over
her fingers; then she sat down, and.
plunging her fingers into the poi,
stirred it around and thrust into her
mouth what clung to the fingers.
And thus tliey each and all eat poi
witiisstAe- two fingers, men. wo-
men andschifdren sitting around and !
eating from the same calabash In
like manner they eat the raw fish
with their fingers from the same
dish. They live in this manner all
over the islands. Few Of their huts
are divided into apartments, and
they generally sleep promiscuously.
Year: 1876

John Morris, a young man about
twenty eight years of age, living near
Langley, went to a masquerade on
Saturday night last. He has always
been noted for laughing immoderate-
ly at any funny incident. Some ludi-
crous feature of the masquerade
caused him to set up fit of laugh
ter, when suddenly he stopped and
fell to- the ground. He was picked
up and a physician sent for, but he
pronounced the case hopeless, as Mr..
Morris had ruptured blood vessel.
The unfortunate man fingered until
Sunday morning, when he died. He
leaves a wife and two children to
mourn his death.
Year: 1876

MAJOR JAMES w. GREEN is a
prominent Virginia lawyer and Mr..
Johnston is a son of a prominent
bank President whose shortcomings
lawyer Green was instrumental in
bringing to the notice of the direc-
tors of the bank, and they made re-
port which reflected severely upon
the ex-President. Young Johnston
felt called upon to fight a duel with
Major Green, but the latter had his
challenger arrested, placed under
bond of $500 to keep the peace for
one year, and will have him brought
before the next Grand jury for vio-
lation of the law, the peace and dig
nifty of the "good old Common
wealth." Mr.. Green is some sixty
years of age and has a wife and a
number of children. Under these
circumstances his action is acqul-
esced in by some of the citizens OF the
sspood old Commonwealth
Year: 1876

The Emperor and Empress of Bra.
zil will arrive in New York in April.
Their Majesties intend to travel
throughout the United States incog.,
and will give special attention to the
common school system, with a view
of stirring up the -Brazilians in an
educational sense when they get back
home.
Year: 1876

TURNING Union soldiers out of of
flee to make room for ex-Confeder-
ates, may be fully mp to the 'true re-
form" promised by Democracy but,
it will fall far short of the re-
form that will satisfy the coun-
try. 1t is bad enough to ap
point Confederate soldiers and
leading rebels to Office while tens
of thousands of brave fellows can be
found who served the nation in its
hour of peril, and who stand in need
OF some employment that will yield
them fair pay for honest services, but
it is far worse to turn out Onelegged
and one armed heroes from positions
conferred by a grateful country to
make room for the former enemies of
the Republic. If this is the policy
of Democracy, the people will effect
ually squelch it when it presents it.
self at the ballot-box at next cleo
tion.- Washington Republic.
Year: 1876

Mr.. JNo. POLLOCK, Of Clinton, who
is now visiting the Centennial writes
to the Herald giving the following
advice to those who intend visiting
the big show:


EDITOR Believing that my
experience might be Of some use to 9th.
ers who may come from Iowa, l here
with furnish you the following for pub
lication. To all who would come,
would say:


1st. Get all baggage checked to depot
| near Centennial Grounds, West Phila
delphia.


I'd. At whatever depot you arrive
take the street cars leading to the Cen
tennial Grounds. On arriving there
get admission to the grounds and 60 a,
once to the Iowa Building, situated neal
the head of State Avenue. Here you
will find cordial reception by any and
all who have any charge of the matter,
and you will be furnished with all the
information necessary for you to find
comfortable places to stay. In this way
I found convient boarding place, fur
nishing lodgings, breakfast and supper
at one dollar per day.
Year: 1876

IT must be one of the very worst
types Of crusty old bathelor that
presides over the columns of the Will
ton Revie,c, for he says: at is cas-
ier for man than woman to 60 through
life alone, for he has better company"
If s'none but the brave deserve the
fair" he Is certainly deserving one
of them, to dare say such thing in
town where the ladies are so noted
for their dexterity in applying tai
and feathers.-Mdguoketo E.rceksior.
Year: 1876

We are happy to say that we never
had better stove than the Charter Oak
The oven is high and roomy, bakes per.
fectly, takes but little fuel, easy to con-
troll, and clean as o pin.
Year: 1876

in preference to shoddy; and we are will
ling they should have them, and in order
that all may supply themselves the
coming season, We have MARKED
PRICES RIGHT DOWN TO ZERO.


Come in and see our home. made calf
boots at IS; our box toe Alexis at $2 so;
our fine serge CATERS at 81 so.
Year: 1876

There is an age for ehildren-the awk-
ward age, so called-when they are too
young to be considered adults, and too
old to be precisely children. At this age
they are apt to be disagreeable, blunder-
ing, or in the way, and it requires great
deal of tact and kindness to keep them
in their right place without snubbing,"
or injuring their selfrespect. How is a
child to learn to respect itself il it sees
that it is alone in the sentiment-that
by no one else it is respected More
harm is perhaps done children by snub-
bing than by weak indulgence. We have
all seen homes where the slightest ex-
preston of child's idea on any point
under discussion was greeted with
Who asked you what you thought p
or with some sarcasm, such as" All,
now we shall have it-Miss Experience
is freeing her mind" It is 80 difficult TO
hit the right mean. We do not want our
children to be troublesome TO visitors
grown.up people do not want to pause in
their talk to listen to the unconsidered
opinions of child of thirtcen-but
what if we tried the experiment of res
pectful attention for while? Would
not the young folks cease talking until
they had something to say, quite as surely
IL they saw that they were listened to
with attention, as il they felt that their
voices were but beating the air7 Even
the smallest of our little ones should be
treated with courtesy and attention.