smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1871

A ScHooL-BOY ON EDIToRs-The ed
itor is one of the happiest animal in rhe
world, especially if some of the subscribers
don't pay. He can go to the circus, after
noon and evening, without paying cent,
that is, if he will do great deal of print
ing for few tickets; he can also 90 to
inquests and hangings, for he has ire.
tickets He has free tickets on all the
railroads, and to all picnic and strawber-
ry festivals, if he is troubled with the ;.big
head" and has more brass than brains
gets wedding cakes sent to him; and some
times gets licking, but not often for he
can take things back in his next issue,
which he generally does never knew
but one editor to get licked. His paper
bursted that day, and he could not take
ANYTHING back While others have TO 20
to bed early, the editor can sit up late at
night and see what is going on. WhenI
get 70 be man mean to be an editor,
so that 1 can stay out late at night. Then
that will be jolly The editor don't have
to saw wood, or do any chopplng except
with his scissors There are a great many
people trying to be editors who cant. and
some of them have been in the profession
for years II am asked if had rather
be circus rider ,r have an education, I
should say let me be editor. 1t is fun
to be swindled by a scape goat subscriber.
Year: 1871

ROMANTIC Story OF CANADIAN
Many years ago young man made
his appearance at StrattOrd. and spent a
few weeks at the tavern which then exist
ed to afford shelter to stage e-coash travel
ers Whence he came, and " hat his busin
ess, none could guess. Directly opposite
the tavern stood the small cottage and forge
OF blacksmith, named Fulsom. He had
a daughter who was the beauty of the
village, and it was her fortune to captivate
the heart of the young stranger. He told
bis love, said that he was travelling incog.,
but in confidence gave her his real name,
claiming that he was heir to large fortune.
She returned his love, and they were mar
ried. A few weeks thereafter the stranger
told his wife that he must visit ew Or
leans he did so. the gossips of the town
made the young wife unhappy by disa-
greeable hints and jeers. To few weeks
the husband returned, but before week
bad elapsed he received large budget of
letters, and told his wife he must at once
return to England, and must 90 alone
He took his departure, and the gossips had
another gloriousSopportunIty to make a
con6ding woman wretched To all but
herself it was clear case of desertion; the
wife became mother, and for two years
lived on in silence and hope. By the end
of that time letter was received by the
Stratford beauty from her husband, direct
ing her to 90 to New York with her child,
taking nothing with her but the clothes
she wore, and to embark in ship for home
10 England.


On her arrival in New York she found
ship splendidly furnished with every con-
veniencc and luxury for her comfort, and
two servants to obey every wish she might
express. The ship duly arrived in Eng
land, and the Stratford girl became mis-
tness Of superb mansion, and, as the wife
of baronet, she was saluted by the aris
tocracy as Lady Samuel st, Ring. On the
death of her husband. many years ago, the
Stanford boy succeeded to the title and
wealth of his father, and in the last edition
of "Peerage and Bsronetage' he is spoken
of as the issue of "Miss Fulsom, of Stat
ford, North America
Year: 1871




Why THEY TARRED AND FEATHERED
AN EDITOR The reason why a mob tore
out the office of the Gazette, published at
Toms River, !, ew Jersey, and tarred and
feathered the editor, and caused pain and
anguish to wiring his brow, was this:
There was fashionable wedding in the
town. a. which the editor was present
After the ccremnouy ne went to the Office
to write an account of the brilliant affair.
Among other things he said that "the
bride was accompanied tu the altar by
eight bridesmaids But the printers
got the thing wrong somehow, and the next
morning the paper announced that "the
bride was accompanied to the altar by tight
bridesmaids" This was bad enough but
the editor had prepared for the same issue
an obituary notice of an estimable 'Rdy,
in which be said that "the husband was
hardly able to bear the demise Of his wife, )"
but--would you believe it?-the printers
actually set it up that "the husband is
hardly able to wear the chemise Of bis wife. ;
So the people Of the town "went" for that
journalist, aud he is now fugitive, an
outcast aud beggar.
Year: 1871




CAVE OF GIaANrIc SxELEToss IN
CANADA Toronto paper says, that
while some parties we're digging on the
hanks of Grand River, and when about
six feet below the surface, they discovered
a strange sight Piled in layers, oDe upon
top of the other, were some two hundred
skeletons of human beings nearly perfect
around the neck Of each one being .
string of beads. There were also deposited
in this pit number of axes and skimmers
made of stone. In the jaws of several of
the skeletons were large stone pipes.


These skeletons are those of men OF
gigantic stature, some of them measuring
nine feet, very few of them less than seven
feet. Some Of the thigh bones were
found to be at least half foot longer than
those at present known, and one of the
skulls examined completely covered the
head of al ordinary person. These skele-
tous are supposed to belong to those OF
race of people anterior to the Indians.
Some three years ago the bones o mast
odon were found embedded in the earth
about six miles from this spot. The pit
and its ghastly occupants are now open to
the view of any who may wish to make q
visit there.


There is not the slightest doubt that
the remains of lost city are on this farm.
At various times within the past few years
the remains of mud houses with their chim.
neys have been found, and there are dog
ems of pits of similar kind tothat .uu-
eartbed, though much smaller, in the
place which has been discovered before,
though the fact has not been made public
hitherto. The remains of a blacksmithis
shop, containing two tons of charcoal and
various implements, was turned up few
mouths ago The farm, which consists Of
$50 acres, has been cultivated for nearly q
century, and was covered with a. thick
growth of piue, so that it must have been
ages ago since the remains we're disposted
there The skulls of the skeletons are of
an enormous size and all manner of shapes,
about half as large again as ale now to be
seen. The teeth in most of them are still
in an almost perfect state Of preservation,
though they still fall out when exposed to
the air.
Year: 1871

MATRIMONIAL SPECULkTIoNs.-S
genius has been engaged in collecting
statistics of marriage, and sums up the
results of his labors as follows During
the past year about 35 per cent. of the
marriages in this city were between the
ages OF 21 and 25 OF the females full
46 per cent were between the ages OF 20
and 25 1t is also shown that disparity
Of age has almost always been in favor of
the males, which to our thinking is not
unnatural, although it is mentioned as
something remarkable. Thus IA out Of
25 widowers for their third union preferred
single ladies' widower for his fourth
wife married maiden of 80 years and
another for his fifth conjugal speculation,
won the heart of a fair damsel of 23.-
Summer and Winter are alike beautiful in
their seasons, but heaven never intended
them to occupy the same broad couch Of
nature together When they do, tears,
clouds and sunshine are the cherries aud
conflicting fruits of the embrace. We
always find ourselves getting serious when
We think of the perilous gulf Of years which
so frequently separates the husband and
the wife; and feelings of reverence will
invariably get the better of us when we
see an old curmudgeon of seventy, with
wealth, wig, false teeth, and wornout car.
cass, laying siege to the necessity or vanity
of eiddy simpleton, with the aim of en-
bittering her days by making her wife
without giving hera husband-for under
the irrevocable laws of nature, society can
not, with all the tormalities of marriage,
make him husband to such wife.-S. F.
Golden City.
Year: 1871

FEMALE DELICACY.-Above every other
feature which adorns the female character,
delicacy stands foremost within the province
of good taste. Not that delicacy which is per-
petually in quest of something to be ashamed
of which makes merit of a blush, and shippers
at the false construction its own ingenuity has
put upon an innocent remark; this spurious
taste as good feeling and good sense; but the
high minded delcacy which maintains its pure
and undertaking walk alike amongst women as
in the society Of men, which shrinks from no
necessary duty, and can speak, when required,
with seriousness and kindness, of things at
which it would be ashamed to smile or to
blush.
Year: 1871

The EXHIBITION OF AFFECTIoN.-We some
times meet with men who seem to think that
any indulgence in an affectionate feeling is
weakness. They will return from journey
and greet their families with distinct dignity,
and move among their children with the cold
and lofty splen1or Of the iceberg. A father
had better extinguish his boys eyes than take
away his heart. Who that has experienced
the joys of friendship and values sympathy
and affection would not rather lose all that is
beautiful in natures scenery than be robbed Of
the hidden treasures of his heart? Who
would not rather follow his child to the grave
than entomb parental affection Cherish,
then, your heart best affections. Do not fear
to indulge in the warm emotions of flial,
parental and fraternal love. Think it not a
weakness. God is love. Love God and every
thing that is lovely. Teach your children to
love-to love the rose, the robin, to love their
parents. Let it be the studied object of their
domestic culture to give them warm hearts and
ardent affections. Bind your whole family
together by these strong cords; you cannot
make them too strong. Religion is love
love to God-love to man.
Year: 1871

WISHING TO BE YOUNG" Give me back
my youth again" did you say? Friend, it is
mistake. Ten to one you wouldn't have it
again if you could. If old Time were to come
bodily to you to-day, saying, Take back, o
wis, middle-aged Noodle, these twenty past
years of your life, with all the pains and dis
appointments which have made you clear
sighted and sound-hearted, with all the silly
actions you perpetrated in those days. and all
the occasions on which you made longeared
donkey of yourself; worry through a second
time all the tight boots and tribulations, all the
toothaches and heartaches of your youth do,
be and suffer it again; be in short once more
just the soft young Noodle you we're twenty
years ago, ten of manhood's hearty hopes
to one dolorous wall for your lost youth, that
you answer Pass on, Father Time And
you may as we'll tip those twenty golden sand
grains back into the lower half of your hour
glass. do not want them.
Year: 1871

DIFFICULTIEs.-Men do not refuse to cross
the ocean because of storms; or to travel by
rail because of accidents or to enter into
business because of losses or to fight in the
battle. field because iof fire, cannon, swords,
deaths or to study science and philosophy be-
cause of mysteries; nor should any one object
to the study and practice OF religion, because
of the various difficulties which may stand
connected with it.
Year: 1871

Mr. johnson, one of the sufferers by the
Bonnet Care crevasse, who is now driven
from his home, declares that the levee
where the break occurred, was not weak
ened by its being cut away to haul wood
sugar, or anything else. He declares that
Sd far from manifesting an indisposition to
strengthen the levee, the planters and their
hands worked a day and half on it in
vain endeavOr 10 prevent the crevasse.


While he says this he insists that the State
authorities in charge of the levees could
have prevented the creva>se at that point,
though he admits that they were not in
formed of the danger to the levee there.
His theory seems TO be that it would have
been useless 20 notify the authorities of the
danger of crevasse, and that it was the
duty rather of the authorities in charge Of
the levees TO keep up a system of rigid
inspection of every foot of the levees in the
State than of planters and others on the
line OF the levee to give notice Of the
danger.


The facts appear to be that there was
culpable negligence in not Immediately
notifying the State authorities OF the danger
to the levee, which is now the scene OF
most destructive crevasse.
Year: 1871

The Times of last evening reports the de-
tails of damages to river steamers during
the hurricane of Tuesday evening. The
Times says:


We learn from the officers of the Vicks-
burg packet Frank Pargoud, which arrived
here to-day at noon, that while effecting d
landing at the foot of Grand View Reach,
fifty miles above the city, the storm came.
on them in the shape of screw hurricane,
and took off both chimneys as clear as
though it were done to order.


One singular circumstance about the fall
ing of the chimneys is that the starboard
one was lifted out of its fastenings in the
casing and carried over the texas, without
any injury thereto, and fell with the other
one on the bank The starboard chimney
sustained but little injury, the leaves being
mashed while the larbOard one was so badly
broken as to cause the cutting up of one
half of it.


The damages to the boat are as follows:
The larboard hurricane roof and boiler deck
is stove in, and from the appearance of the
break it will take some days before it will
be repaired.


Some idea of the force of the storm Tues
day evening may be gathered from the fol
lowing statement OF passenger on the En-
terprlse:


Tuesday evening, May 3 at P. NJ, when
about five miles below Plaquemines, we en-
countered perfect tornado, which lasted
for over an hour. The wind was terrific,
lashing the water of the river into waves
higher than were ever seen.


AS it was we escaped with the loss only
of our smoke stacks, which were taken up
as paper and carried clean and clear off the
boat.


The Leonidas, which left here Monday
evening for Cincinnati, was terribly dam
aged by the storm. Particulars are detailed
by our river reporter.
Year: 1871

This is special to the Chicago Tribune


WASHINGTON, April 30.-Discredit having
been thrown on the statement in these dis
patches to the effect that Secretary Fish
would resign about June |, it may be as well
to affirm that the information came from
the State Department in such way as to
place the fact beyond doubt The Secre-
tary has already twice rendered his resigna-
ton, it being withdrawn, III the last in
stance, at the request of the President, with
the distinct understanding that, after the
be finished, there would be no further OBJ
lection urged. AS personal favor, the Sec
retary has continued to occupy his present
position up to this time, but viii positively
insist on going out by the first of June. no
matter what action the Senate may take
with regard to the treaty submitted by the
Joint High Commission.
Year: 1871

"The fact is" said an elderly wife, "a man
does not know how to straighten up things
He does not know how to commence.
don't WONDER" she remarked in conclusion
"that when God made Adam, he went right
to work and made woman to tell him
what to do"
Year: 1871

Intervention in Favor of the Temporal


Power of the Pope Asked For.


BRUSSELS, May 3.-The Belgian Catholics
petition Theirs for Intervention in favor of
the temporal power of the Pope.
Year: 1871

persons who buy tickets in the Louisiana
State Lottery They frequently walk into
the capital of that institution by drawing
prize and having it immediately cashed.
The next single number drawing takes place
on Saturday. Those who are going to have
a chance for one of the 44O prizes to be dis
tributed then had better buy tickets at
once.
Year: 1871

The expense of producing this truly wonderful
spectacular drama has doubt deferred other
managers from putting it on. But, as object is
money! with the management of the st. Nicho-
las it will be executed-with what effect We leave
an appreciative audience to judge my2 st
Year: 1871

TONIGHT
Will be presented, for the first time in New Or
leans, remarkable troupe of talent, who have
1ablished an enviable reputation among the play
going people of the "Old World" under the cap
1sOu of
Year: 1871

1t is said BY good medical authority that
there is not the remOtest corner or little
inlet Of the minute blood vessels Of the hu
man body that does not feel some wavelet
from the cOnvuleion occasioned BY good
hearty laughter, and also that the central
man. or life principle is shaken to its in
nermost depths, sending new tides of life
and strength to the surface, and thus ma
terially tending to insure good health 10 The
persons who indulge therein The blood
moves more rdPidly-probably caused by
some chemical or electric modification Oc-
casioucd by the convulsiOn-and conveys
different impression to all the organs of
the body as it visits them on that particu-
lar mystic Journey, when the man is laugh
ing, from what it does at other times. For
this reason every good hearty laugh in
which person INDUCES tends to lengthen
bis life, conveying, as it does, new and dis
slnct stimulus to the vital forces. We
doubt not the time will come when phys-
clans, cOnceding more importance than they
! nov do to the influence Of the mind upon
the vital forces Of the body, will prescribe
70 the torpid and melancholy patient GER
tam number Of hearty peals Of laughter, to
De undergone at stated periods, and believe
that they will, in so doing, find the best
anf most effective method Of producing
tie required effect upon be patient. Oar
advice to all j., indulge in good, hearty,
soulful laughter, when the opportunity Of
fers, and if you Do not derive material ben
ehl therefrOm, charge US with utterng
false principles of materia medica. Health
and Home.
Year: 1871

A great many men would be real forces
Of goodness in the world, II they did not
let all their principle and enthusiasm
escape in words. They arc like loco
motives which let off so much steam
through the escape valves that, though
they fill the air with noise they have not
power enough left TO move the train.
II you have got any principle, any faith
any enthusiasm, any fire In your soul,
keep the toDgue-valye close, and let your
spiritual forces move your HANDS to
noble deed sIsDd make1Ycuf rect run on
errands h,rgOy,
Year: 1871

The Catho'ic World.-The March number Of
this serial has been issued Dy the Catholic Pubca-
ton House In this city. 1t closes the twelfth vol
ume OF the work and gives promise Of the opening
OF the thirteenth on the lst or April The enterprise
appears hopeful, consolatory OF the past and evil
IDENTITY encouraging OF the future.
Year: 1871

SIR. Stephens has lately been main
tanning that the validity of the fourteenth
aud fifteenth amendments is a proper
judicial question, which may be finally
decided by the Federal Supreme Court.
We deem it unnecessary to argue the
question of Jurisdiction with Mr.. Ste
pheus. who has lately been discussing
that point with much acutehess aud in-
genuity If DIR. Stephens should advo-
cate the construction of wind mill on
the top Of Mount Washington for saw
ing pine logs into lumber, we, in declin-
ing to take any stock in the enterprise.
would not argue the feasibility of con-
structing the mill. We should think it
quite irrelevant for Mr. Stephens TO con
lend that the force of wind on that ele-
waited peak would suffice for saving all
the timber in New England and the Can
adss. Admit IL all but how are you
going to ge; your logs to the top of
Mount Washington ? Suppose it true,
a. Mr. Stephens argues, that it is within
the competency of the Supreme Court
to decide whether an amendment TO the
Constitution has, or has not been propei :
ly adopted. how is he going 10 get the
case before the court? Mr. Stephens
was bred a lawyer, and ought to be able
to tell us. There can be 10 suit without
parties-a plaintiff and defendant


Who shall be plaintiff, and who defend


ant in suit to test, for example, the
VALIDITY of the fifteenth anie endmeDt? Mr.


Stephens seems more interested than
anybody hut can he bring suit? Gear


ly not, for several sufficient reasons. In
the & st place, re has no cause OF per


sonal complaint of which Federal
court could take knowledge. In the
next place, if negro voting in Georgia
we're an individual wrong to him. there is
no party ON whom he could serve notice
as defendant. He cannot sue Congress;
he cannot sue the States that ratified the
amendment; he cannot sue his own State
OF Georgia nor any of her officers. No
suit can be brought by anybody, nor
will lie against anybody, for testing the
validity of the fifteenth amendment. Ii,
in any State, the right of suffrage were
denied to the negroes, negro of that
State might bring suit for damages !;
but every State admits negroes to the
There is therefore no ground of proseeu


tion on either side, nor against anybody.
We wish Mr. Stephens would tell us how
a suit can be commenced that would
bring the validity of the fifteenth amend


ment before the Supreme Court for ad-
Indication; tell Us how he will find par
ties that would have standing in court,
and what is the wrong for which the
plaintiff would seek redress If an in
genious lawyer cannot explain how such
suit can be brought, his idea of testing
the validity of the fifteenth amendment
in the Supreme Court is of course chi
merical. 1t is a windmill for saving
logs on the summit of Mount Washing
ton whittier no logs will be brought
Year: 1871

A post mortem examination has just
been held upon the body of two year
old child OF Mr.. Louis Schappert, a
butcher residing in this place, which
died day or two since iu great agony.
1t was taken suddenly violently i'll, and
nothing could be administered that seem
ed to afford relief. Its body swelled to
nearly twice its natural size. and il died
vomiting blood. On the opening of the
stomach of the child the cause of the
ngular illness and death was discover
ed. In the coating of the stomach, with
its huge horns firmly imbedded, Was an
enormous stag beetle. The only expla
nation that could be given as to the mau
ner OF the insect getting into the stom
ach was that given by the child's mother,
who stated that the night tho child was
taken sick. aud few moments before
the first symptoms, il had asked for q
drink The mother gave the child a
drink from cup containing water, and
sitting on chair beside the bed. There
is no doubt that one of these horned
beetles had fallen into the cup while
flying about the room, and the child
drank it with the water.
Year: 1871

The prosperity of place is always indicated
by the general appearance af its newspaper.
For example, the South Carolina papers are
small and look shriveled up and weakly. The
Western North Carolina papers look as if they
had been printed hundred years ago. Several
conservative and as if they had pIoughed along
in same furrow for very long time, The At
lanta papers look young and new. The Memphis
papers are large and wooden, while the Nash
vile papers are somewhat inclined to the same
style only in a smaller degree.
Year: 1871

\ Mr.. Redden living about two miles north
of Wallace Cross Roads, in Anderson county,
met with an accident of very serious and al
most fatal nature on the 18th inst. He was cut
ting down large white oak tree which, falling
p attempted to escape The tree threw @ % Rm to the
ground and, falling across his thighs, smashed
one of them up horribly, and severely bruised
the other. He lay under the tree some time,
and was rescued by man and some women
who were near. Medical assistance was called
in and the broken bones were set, but the man
is suffering very much, and it is considered very
doubtful whether he will recover. That seems
an unfortunate place, for within the last month
it has been the scene of two very narrow escapes
from immediate death. Polk