smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1873

foolish little maiden bought foolish little bonnet
WIN ribbon, and feather, and bit oflace upon it,
And that the other madens of the little town might


know it,
She thought she'd go to meeting the next Sunday


just to show it.
But though the little bonnet WAS scarce larger than
a dime,
The getting Oft settled proved to be work of


time;
So when twas fairely tied all the bells had stopped


their ringing,
And when she came to meeting. sure enough the


folks were singing.
So this foolish little maiden stood and waited at the


door,
And she shook her RULES out behind and smoothed
them down before
"Hallelujah Hallelujah!" sang the choir above her


head
"Hardly knew you! hardly knew you!" were the


words she thought they said.
This made the little maiden feel so very ver cross
That she gave her little mouth twist her little


head toss!
For she thought the very hymn they sung was all


about her bonnet,
With the ribbons, and the feathers and the bit of


lace upon it.
And she would not wait to listen to the sermon or


the prayer,
But pattered down the silent street and hurried up


the stair,
Till she'd reached her little bureau and in band


box on it,
Had hidden safe from critics eye her foolish little


bonnet
Which proves, my little Inaidens, that each of you


will find
In every Sabbath service but an echo of your mind;
And that the little head that's filed with silly little


airs
viii never get blessing from sermons or from


prayers.
Year: 1873

The man that don't take paper
was in town the other day. He
brought his family to town in an OK
wagon. He took his wife to the black
smith shop to be measured for pair
of shoes. He also went to the dent
lists to get his plow sharpened. His
girl carried the baby around town in
sugar-trough. When it would cry
she would stop on the street to rock
it, and sing Barbara Allan.


The oldest boy had sold some coon
skins and had got enough money to
go on a "bust." He had heard tell
of soda-water, and was a going to
give it fair trial, puke or no puke-
He went to the drug g7store and called
for q glass of soda and water. The
clerk gave him mixture of sal-soda
and water, and the last 1 saw of him
he Was standing in the door, soaking
gingerbread in it and making wry
faces.


The old man mistook meat-house
for church. He went In and hung
his hat on q meat-hook, and waited
one hour for meeting to begin. He
went to the clothing store to purchase
a windmill, and to the jewelers. to get
a tea-kettle mended. He over heard
two men talking of the fall Of Adam,
told his wife about it, and wondered
if the fall hurt him much. He wanted
to know if the Kamschatkians had
taken Cuba, if so, where they had
taken it to. He still thought that
Millard. fillmore was President, and
wanted to know what State New
Jersey was in. A sewing machine
agent asked him if he wanted to pur-
chase a sewing machine No, he said,
he did not want one. He sowed his
wheat broadcast out of bucket. He
sold his wheat for IS cents a bushel,
when he might have got 81 so.


[ asked him what State he came
from. He said he didn't know, but
it was somewhere in New Jersey.
He told his wife he bet he knowed |
where so many Smiths come from.
He said he saw a sign that said Smith
Manufacturing Company. I


Hesaw the telegraph wire and asked
whose clothes line that was. He was
asked if his family had ever had re-
igion. He said no, but family had
it about o mile from his house and he
was afraid his children would catchit. |
I asked him if he didn't want to take
the Highland News? What's that,
says he, and I told him and left.


BLACK-EYED JOHNNY.
Year: 1873

The young man who has an ambition to
make great noise in the world should learn
boiler making He can make more noise at
that trade than at anything else he can en-
gage in.


If he believes a man should ''strike for
wages" he should learn blacksmithing
pecially if he is good at blowing" .-.


If ne would embrace profession in which
he can rise rapidly he should become an
aeronaut. He couldn't find anything better
"for high"


He certainly could do a staving (and per-
haps a starving) business at the cooper
trade.


If he believes in measures, not men, he
will embark in the tailoring business.


If the one great object of his life is to
make money he should get a position in the
United States mint.


If he is a punctual sort of chap, and
anxious to be ION time" he should put his
hands to matchmaking.


If he believes it the chief end of man to
have his business largely 'felt, why of
course, he will become halter


If he wants to ''get at the root of thing"
he will become a dentist-although, if he
does, he will be often found Cooking down
in the mouth"


If man is bungler at his best he should
become a physician, and then he will have
none of his bad work thrown upon his hands.
1t is generally buried out of sight, you know.


Should he incline to high living, but pre-
fer plain board, then the carpenters trade
will suit him He can plane board enough
at that.


If he is kneady and well-bread he will be
right at home as baker.


He shouldn't become a cigar maker. If
he does all his work will end in smoke.


The young man who enjoys plenty of COM
pany, and is ever ready to scrape acquaint-
ance, will find the barber business congo
nial pursuit.


The quickest way for him to ascend to
the top round of his calling is to become a
hod-carrier.


A very grave young man might flourish
as an undertaken.


Don't learn chairmaking, for no matter
how well you please your customers, they
will sooner or later get down on your work


And don't become an umbrella-maker for
their business is fused up"


If he would have his work touch the heads
of the nation, we know of no way he could
sooner accomplish such an object than by
making combs.


The young man who would have the fruits
of his labor brought before the eyes of the
people will become an optician. The work,
being easily seen through, cannot be difficult
to learn.


A man can always make a scent in the
perfumery business.


If a young man is paragon of honor,
truthfulness, sobriety, has never sworn a
profane word, and has twenty thousand dol
lars that he has no use for, then he should
Immediately start-a newspaper.-[F. c.,
Saturday Night.
Year: 1873

place would be in the regular army,
with rifle on his shoulder.


Z. Finally, there is the blessed
Lamp of Christ's Example, to guide
the meek in judgment, to llumine
what is dark in the ways of Provi-
dence. No failure need be feared for
the well-trained, well-furnished, and
patient intellect that looks for help to
the Supreme Teacher; that reverent-
ly accepts the Bible as its guide-book
to the only knowledge that can salts
fy and save the soul, that lovingly
and prayerfully leads the way to that
highest wisdom whose beginning is
the fear of the Lord, whose paths are
pleasantness and peace, whose end is
life eternal-National Teacher.
Year: 1873

Do not try too hard to be polite.


Never overwhelm your friends by
begging them to make themselves at
home, or they viii soon wish they
were there. Show by your actions
rather than by your words that you
are glad to see them.


Have enough regard for yourself to
treat your enemy with quiet polite
ness. All petty sights are merely
meanness, and hurt yourself more
than any one else.


Do not talk about yourself or your
family to the exclusion of other topics
What if you are clever, and little
more SO than other people, it may be
that other folks will not think so,
whatever they ought to do.


1t may be interesting to you to talk
over your ailments, but very tiresome
for others to listen to.


Make people think you consider
them clever and agreeable, and they
will be pretty apt to have a pleasant
impression of yourself.


Treat people just as you would
have them treat you.


1t is much easier to lose the good
opinion of people than to regain
it; and when any one does not care
for the good opinion of others, he or
she is not worthy of respect.


Do not excuse your house, furni-
trlre, or the table you set before your
guests. 1t is fair to suppose their
visits are to you, and not to your sur
roundings.


The whole machinery of social in
tercourse is very delicate and intri-
cate, and it is our business to keep
all places of possible friction well sup
Piled with the oil of poiteness.
Year: 1873

This is the title given by Whittier to these brave
md hopeful verses from his pen. They ought tc
shine in letters of gold from the walls of all the
houses in the land be alive and ringing theil
rue and encouraging music in every memory. The
poet tells MS how treasure the past believe in the
present, and look forward to the future:
o sometimes CLEANS upon our sight,


Through present wrong, the Eternal Right! 20
And step by step, since time began,
We see the steady gain of man.


That all of good the past has had


Remains to make our own time glad,


Our common daily life divine, "a
And every land Palestine.
We lack but open eye and ear


To find the Orient's marvels here,


The still, small voice in autumn's hush,
Yon maple wood the burning bush.


For still the New transcends the Old,


In signs and tokens manifold;


Slaves rise up men; the Olive waves


With roots deep set in battle graves


Through the harsh noises of the day


A low, sweet prelude finds it way;


Through clouds of doubt and creeds of fear
A light is breaking, calm and clear.


Henceforth my heart shall sign no more
For olden time and holier shore;


Gods love and blessing, then and there,
Are now, and here, and everywhere.
Year: 1873

When men are called into the
Christian life, they do not come in as
experts and veterans; they come in
as recruits to be drilled, and all their
campaign lies before them. The vic
tory of our faith is gained step by
step; and the great personal epochs
in our history are those in which the
good principle, after severe conflict,
gains ascendancy over the evil that is
In us.
Year: 1873

am composed of Il letters.
My first is in night, but not in day,
Ny second is in June, but not in May,
My third is in West, but not in East,
My fourth is in party, also in feast,
My fifth is in coach, also in car,
My sixth is in near, also in far,
My seventh is in rye, also in bread,
My eighth is in iron, but not in lead,
My ninth is in corn, but not in hay,
My tenth is in white, but not in gray,
My eleventh is in fast, but not in slow,
My twelfth is in rain, but not in snow,
Ny thirteenth is in dough, but not in cake,
Ny fourteenth is in sea, but not in lake.
My whole is the name of young man of my ac-
luaintance. EULlCE.
HillsbOro, Jan. 1873.
Year: 1873

A New Fairfield man has invented tor
pedo in the shape of kernel of corn; it
is designed for the beguilement of crows, as
soon as that offensive bird takes hold of it.
it explodes and blows the top of its head off
This affords cheap and innocent recreation
for the crow, and at the same time does
away with a grievous evil.-[E1change.
Year: 1873

They have instituted a new kind of sur
prise party out west. An anonymous letter
IS sent to citizen, informing him in friend
ly spirit that surprise party is to be given
him on a certain evening. He gets ready
for it, nobody comes, and the surprise is
overpowering.
Year: 1873

90 GkAMERCY PARK.-ELEGANTLY FURNISHED
AJ Second Floor, suite separate with or with
out Board private table If desired; house entirely first
Class highest reference given and required
Year: 1873

THE DEATH OF DRUNKARD.-lt
there is one spectacle on earth more
melancholy than another, it is the death
of a drunkard. Friends turn away from
such a scene in despair, not wishing to
linger to catch The last whispers OF the
dying wretch, whose scarcely percepti-
bic breath is impregnated with the fumes
of poison, that has destroyed both soul
and body. When the last spark ex-
pires, and the soul has taken its flight
from rotten carcass, and few friends,
out of duty to kindred humanity, carry
the cold, polluted body to its silent HI
ding place, voice seems to proclaim,ln
accents fresh from the eternal world,
lost lost No hope-no hope


Notwithstanding the awful truth OF
the above, there are those dear to many
who read this, now rushing on to per
form part in this melancholy tragedy.
Some OF the most promising Of friends
a few years ago, had written, while 9TH
ers are now writing their names upon
this pass book of hell, and it would ap-
pear from their acts as though each
were striving to be first on the list of
victims. How needless they rush on to
ruin! We would snatch them from the
blood-dripping wheels of this idol, but
they will not be saved. If not, great
God deliver coming generations from
such fate.
Year: 1873

In view of the attention now direct
the temperance question, the folio
, curious doggerel may be read wi
he interest


Ye friends of moderation,
Who think a reformation,
Or moral renovation,
Wcu.d benefit our nation
Who deem intoxication,
With all its dissipation,
In every rank and station,
The cause of degradation,
OF which our observation
Gives daily demonstration
Who see the ruination,
Distress, and desolation.
The open violation


OF moral obligation,
The wretched habitation,
Without accommodation,
Or any regulation,
For common sustenation;
A scene of deprivation,
Unequaled in creation,
The frequent desecration
Of Sabbath ordination,
The crime and degradation,
Defying Legislation
The awful proclamation,
Of common conversation,
The mental alteration,
And dire infatuation,
With every sad gradation,
To maniac desperation ;
Ye who, with CONSERVATION,
Behold this devastation,
Aud utter condemnation,
OF all inebriation,


Why sanction its duration,
Or show disapprobation
Of any combination
For its determination ?
We deem declaration,
That offers no temptation,
BY any palliation


OF this abomination,
The only sure foundation,
And under this persuasion,
Hold no communication,
With noxious emanation,
Of brewers fermentation,
Nor any vain libation
Producing stimulation.
To this determination
We call consideration,
And without hesitation
Invite cooperation,
Not doubling imitation,
Will raise your estimation,
And by continuation
Afford you consolation,
For in participation
With this association :
You may, by meditation,
Insure the preservation
Of a future generation
From all contamination,
And may each indication
Of such regeneration
BE the theme of eXultatlon
Till it's final consummation.
Year: 1873

GETTING READY TO BE HARPY.-That
is exactly what the most of us are do
ing. We are not ready 10 be happy to-
day, this week, this year but tO-mor-
row, next month, another year, our cup
of ioy will be full. When tho promised
time comes, and the acme of hopes in a
certain direction is reached, health may
be wanting, friends dead, and life, how
ever full Of all we thought would make
it rich and worth the having, be empty
and dreary. But he who stakes the
best of now and here" and enjoys it,puts
hims If into possession of that which
cannot be taken away.


Certainly it is right to provide for
the rainy day, in health to prepare for
sickness, in youth to lay up for old age;
but there is much more time than many
of rs think, while doing this, to be hap
py in the present, and there are thou-
sand paths to happiness if We but have
the skill and the desire to find them.


We are too eager in the pursuit OF
some far off result to take time to be
happy to-day. How often do we look
back on years that have fed, and see
many elements of truest enjoyment,
which at the time we took no notice of,
and which, could we count them in
now, would fill our cup of JOY to over
flowing. Shall We learn no lesson from
this
Year: 1873

A lady returning from an Improbable
visit to church declared that "wben she
saw the shawls of those Smiths, and then
thought of the things her own poor girls
had to wear, if it wasn't for the cOnso-
lation of religion she did not know what
she should do"
Year: 1873

In fottsville, when anything happens,


the people consider that religious duty
ueVoiVes upon them to hold meeting and
10 pass resolutions upon it and so strong
mas tins habit become that some citizens OF
that place, Whenever the breakfast bell
rings, call a meeting of the family, elect
o11icers, and resolve to go down stairs and
eat the meal. The other day woman
iel into the canal and sunk. A large
crowd OF men were standing upon the
bank at the time, they instantly proceeded
to organize meeting for the purpose of
devislng means for rescuing the woman.
Alter spirited debate, man named Col
Inns was elected chairman !; and, on taking
his seat, he not only thanked the meeting
very warmly for the compliment offered
him, but he made long speech, in which
he discussed the tariff, the coal product for
1871, and the Alabama claims. A series
of resolutions were then offered, and after
a prolonged discussion and the acceptance
OF several amendments, they were passed.


They embraced protest against the
depth of the canal, regrets that all women
are not taught to swim, and resolve to
rescue the particular woman who had
fallen overheard. A committee of one
was appointed to dive for her. He dove,
and brought the woman to the surface by


her hair. Just then it occurred to him
that he had not been ordered to bring her
to shore. So he let her sink again, and
swan to the bank to report progress and
ask Tor turther Instructions. Action was
taken upon the report, and after an excit-
ing discussion he was directed to land the


woman Immediately. He dove again and


dragged her out. None of the women in


Pottsville can hold their breath more than
an hour and half at a time, so when this
one was recovered she was dead. The
meeting said it was sorry, but it was vast
y more important that things should be
done decently and in order, and according
to rule. than that the life of a woman
| should be saved. The woman hasn't ex-
pressed her views yet.-lfar Adeler.
Year: 1873

Government is now feeding and clothing all who accepted it." and in speaking of Gen. Crook he says: "Now Gen. Crook is following, and with the sword compelling

 those who have not accepted the terms of peace to do so. The great obstacle to the subjugatiOn of the Amches has been the lack of any definite OF fixed policy; but one now appears to have been settled upon, and if carried out with the same vigor and fidelity as at pres ent practiced, we may hope for an early and lasting peace"

 The Texas and Pacific and At lantic and Pacific railways are spoken of encouragingly. Work has already commen ed on the Eastern end of the Texas and Pa cific, and, it is believed, work will speedily be commenced on the Western end.

 The agricultural interests of the Territory, which have nearly doubled within the last year, is to receive the fostering care of our Legislature.

 A Registry law is earnestly re- commended, which, in our opi- nlon, is the only safeguard to the ball0t-boX that could be adopted in this Territory.

 There are many other import ant matters referred to in the message, of which we shall here after speak.
Year: 1873

readers will observe We have enlarged the SENT MEL 10 eight pages. The press of advertise ments compelled this change, and notwithstanding the enlargement we must defer the publication Of some ads. and important matter until our next issue.
Year: 1873

| AN OBITUARY EDITOR.-The 81


Louis Republican has On spplicsD


for the position Of obituary editor


His letter asking for the situation


gives a sample of his abilities. H'


says:


Our parents were wealthy but hon


est. and Of course We are now poor


but we can live on a very little


because Mary Ann and | have made


ourselves into a grange and buy al


retail at wholesale prices.


May be you have fall corpse to


do your funny writing, so if you will
engage me I will }, aUy thing in the


obituary line; it will suit our feelings


better, for Mary Anu and | have


been in sffliction ately, Great-grsnd-


mother Peck died last week, aged
CXIX. She died once before, when
she was uiuty-six, but just after she
was laid out she seemed to remem ber
somehow that she had forgotten to
to 6nish footing a stocking for her
youngest boy, who was only seventy
four years of age, so she came to again
ADD as winter was coming on, and so
much knitting to be done, she con-
cluded to keep en- for twenty years or
80. The doctor thioks if she sin't
disturbed she is gone for good this
time. Me sud Mary Ann sat up With
her to the last, and she was checked
off into the full fruition of all her
faculties. l couldn't help moraIiziug
as l sat by her bedside how lean a
person can get and yet consume so
much gruel-she beat any thing all
hollow that | ever saw. Poor old
soul, she was so lean that mosquitoes
had ceased to be burden; they used
to lign t on her and hammer oo her
skull with their bills till the room
sounded like a telegraph ofice, then
they would scratch their heads with
their hind legs and sail out of the
window worn out. She seemed to
gain little flesh after we came back
from Chicago, and got new spirits;
but somebody told her that her name
vas accidentIy left out of Edwards
Directory and she fell off again. She
hadn't walked any to Speak for the
last twenty-five years, and 1t used to
console her to think how mnch she
had saved on shoes. When | look at
the Id calico cushion with its faded
roses that she sat embowered in since
she was l04, l hesve sigh at the
transformers Of all sublunarian coG-
fort. Her eyes got so weak that she
wore seven pair Of glasses for spell,
nut they warnt strong enough for her
to get the sense out other Scriptures,
so we had pair Of opera glasses
mounted so that she could wear them
on her nose. She sat up the heiticst
part Of the day beforesbe suutfed out,
and told me many things coufdenti-
arily. She remembered distinctly
when General Washin ton got the
check cashed that Oakes Amos gave
him for signing the Pacific Railroad
bill-aud she was quite big girl
when Cyrus Field and Hsudrick
Hudson brung tho Atlantic cable
over in the May Flower. What is
home withouta great grandmother
Year: 1873

A poor Turkish slater Of CONSTANT
nople, being at work upon the roof Of
a house, lost his footing and fell into
the narrow street upon a man. The
pedestrian was killed by the conclusion,
while the slater escaped without mate
rial injury. A son of the deceased
caused the slater to be arrested. The
cadi listened attentiyely, and in the end
asked the slater what he had TO say in
his defence. dispenser Of Justice an
swered the accused, ut is even as this
man says; but God forbid that there
shonld be evil in my heart. | am
poor man and know not how TO make
amends" The son Of the man who
had been killed thereupon demanded
that condign punishment should be IN
flicted upon the acused. The cadi med
itated few moments, and finally said:
ut shall be So" Then TO the slater
he said: "TbOu shalt stand in the
street where the father Of this young
man stood when thou didst fall on him.
And TO the acuser he added. Thou
shalt if it please thee, 90 upon the roof
and fall upon the culprit, even as he
fell on thy father. Allah be praised y