smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1876

A recipe has been discovered by DR.. Grif-
fifth, of Wyoming, that should make all fat
men superlatively happy. especial [y those
who have been drinking vinegar for years
to reduce the flesh. The doctor does not
propose to reduce to size that will secure
positions for men as living skeletons in the
side show, to give them the appearance Of a
billiard cue, or spring umbrella closed up
but to bring them down twelve pounds to
thirty in two months. The golden remedy
is "gulf weed" made into tea.
Year: 1876

How CRICKET SAVED A SHP.-In
Southey's "History of Brazil" he tells
how Cabeza de Vaca was in great ship
going to South America with four hun
dred men. and thirty horses; and after they
had crossed the equator, the commander
discovered. that there were only three
casks of water left. He gave orders to
make the nearest land, and for three days
sailed for the coast. A poor, sick SOL
dier, who had left Cadiz with them
brought grillo, or ground cricket, with
him, thinking its cheerful voice would
amuse him on the long, dreary voyage,
but to his great disappointment the little
insect was perfectly silent the whole way.
The fourth morning after the ship had
changed her course, the cricket, who
knew what she was about, set up her
shrillest note. The soldier at once gave
warning to the officers in charge of the
vessel, and she soon saw high, jagged
rocks just ahead of them. The watch
had been careless, and the great ship, in
few moments would have been dashed
to pieces on the ledges, if this puny crea-
ture had not scented the land and told
them of their danger. Then they cruised
along for some days, and the cricket sang
for them every night, just as cheerily as
if she had been in far-off Spain, till they
got to their destined port, the island of
Catalina.-Selected.
Year: 1876

Not long since a proposition was
made to food the great desert of
Sahara from the Pacific Ocean, thus
forming an immense inland sea, In
p lace of the. sand now occupying the
northern part of Africa. It i. mag.
ni6cent project, and if carried out,
would work wonders in both Europe
and Africa. A similar proposition
has now been made regarding the des-
ert lying in the western part of our
own country, which has a more special
interest for us. IT'S stated that there
is chain of valleys, commencing near
the Gulf Of California, and extending
into the continent over 700 miles
These valleys are we'll calculated for ag-
ricultural purposes. with the important
exception that it is 1ainless region.
Evidently it has sometime formed a
part Of the ocean, and the accumula-
tions of salt and sea fossils render the
soil fertile In the extreme. The pro-
posal is to open a channel from the
Colorado. River, aud another from the
Gulf of California into these valleys
making navigable body of water
through them, and also giving the re


quired water facilities for agriculture.
There is query raised as to whether
the intro duction of water would not
cause rains and produce climate simi.
lar to that on the opposite side of the
Sierras. It does not seem necessary
to carry out this plan at present, to1
there is still room to "go west," ano
the trouble does not consist in finding
farms, but farmers. But there may
come day when our extensive west


is so thickly settled that it will be vel


to reclaim the desert and make it serv,
for mans habitation.
Year: 1876

The Sun AND THE WEATHER.
The astronomers have been noting
that the sun Of late has been remark
ably free from spots, aud during the
period there has been very warm spring
like weather. About two weeks ago,
however, the sun was found quite spot
ted again, and at the same time the
Thermometer began to fall. This was
the case not only in this country but
IN Europe, and the Paris correspon-
dent of the New York Times writes
that the weather suddenly changed
there to the coldest, rawest and most
dlsagreeable weather of the season.
This fact has again given life to the
theory that there is relation between
the sun spots and the temperature
upon this planet. Mr.. Lockyer, the
English astronomer. reported about the
lst of January that he found the sur
perfectly free from spots, and inferred
that it might indicate a period Of mild
weather. The very same day Father
Secci made the same observation In
Rome. Neither astronomer asserted
that there would be mild weather on
earth because the sun was spotless, but
both inferred that this might be the
case, and such has been the case in fact
The difficulty about the ttheory is to
afford an explanation how the greater
heat of the sun, presumably indicated
by the absence of the spots, is SO
quickly transmitted to the atmosphere
Of the earth.
Year: 1876




There was a slight rutnpus near the
escaped the vigilance Of the officer on
duty. An old negro man, evidently from
the country, was sitting in his wagon
apparently wrapped in deep thought.
His hair was plentifully sprinkled with
gray, and he was carefully polishing the
glasses Of q pair Of venerable-looking
spectacles. Something in his appear
ance attracted the attention OF two
NEATLY dressed mulatto boys, who, with
cigars in their mouths, were sauntering
leisurely by. -


"Dere's old man Methuselah, re-
marked one, while the other began to
name was Methuselah-his name was
Methuselah. When he got old he went
to"


But before the saddle -colored warbler
could finish his ditty, the object OF his
serenade had leaped from the wagon
and seized him. The next moment the
tuneful youth was wriggling on the
ground, while the old man was thump-
ing him with No. II brogan without
regard to the musical pauses, and with
such vigor as to leave the impression
on those within hearing that an army
of spring carpet -beaters had suddenly
/


"Methuselum aint had no sich marrer
in his leg like dis, Is hep" queried the
old man as he gave the youth u final jar
that sent him rolling out of reach.
Scrambling to his feet, the bruised boy,
without answering the interrogatory,
made up the street at pace that soon
carried him out OF sight.


I'm q lonesome niger, am," re-
marked the veteran, as he picked up his
hat, which had fallen off his head during
the humping process. II am lonesome
by nature, and when I gets mad my
lonesomeness is de wus kinder disease.
Dey amt no town niggers roun' here, !"
he continued, giving a suggestive pull
at the lappels OF his coat and casting q
glance at those whose attention had
been attracted by the incident just re-
lated" dey aint no town niggers roun'
here dat wants to keep me from bein'
lonesome, is dey? Ell dey is. just let
him walk right out here in the sand,
shuck hisself, an l will see ef ! cannot
keep him com my while my wind lasts. "
AS there was no response to this some
what sarcastic challenge, the aged negro
mounted the wagon again and was soon
engaged in enjoying his propensities for
"lOneSOmeneSS,"
Year: 1876

THE Rev. 1. K. Noble, Of Plymouth
Church, San Francisco, don't think the
people of California as good as they
ought to be. In recent sermon he
said: The hold of christianity on the
hearts Of the people Of California is
not strong. As a class they are not
God-fearing. Few of them seek first
the kingdom of God and his righteous
ness; and the three thousand dram
shops in this city, the numerous houses
of prostitution and the scenes daily en-,
acted in the police courts, show how
few of the people walk in the ways of
purity and righteousness.
Year: 1876

The post Office authorities say that
of the thirteen thousand letters re-
ceived at the dead-letter Office daily
fully one-half cannot be returned to
the writer's or persons addressed be-
cause the letters themselves do not
contain any clue to the names of the
places from which they are sent, the
names of the writer's, or those of the
parties addressed. Here is a hint to
careless letter-writers to invariably
put at least the address of the party
addressed in the body of the letter as
we'll as on the envelope. Six thous-
and persons are daily writing letters
which do not reach their destination
because they fail to observe certain
simple rules. Until they do observe
them they will GO on wasting time,
pen, ink and paper to no purpose.
Year: 1876

have taken up on my ranch on Squaw
creek one stray mare, dun or mouse col
ored, with star in forehead. Has no
brand. Also one two year old filly, same
color, belonging to the mare. The owner
is hereby notified to prove property, pay
charges and take them away.


DENNIS CROWLEY.
Year: 1876

So sudden was his movements, that
ere the rest of the group could
comprehend the scene, he was clear
Of the store, and as Gilbert reach
ed the door, he saw the robber
spring into the saddle on Hero's
back, and dash away.


Pursuit was not to be thought Of /;
but Gilbert placed his fingers to
his mouth, and gave shrill whistle !;
hearing which, old Hero, despite
the urging of his rider wheeled
suddenly, and at the same wild
gallop, started back to his master.


Seeing this, Curly Bill attempted
to throw himself from the saddle |;
but in so doing, his foot caught in
the stirrup, and be was dragged
helplessly over the hard road. For
tunately for the poor victim of this
mishap, the distance was not great,
or the result might have been far
more serious.


How often is it that the most
trifing accident contributes to the
ends of justice Williams may sue
cessfully carry on their work for
years, and in their fancied securi-
ty forget the fate that must eventu-
ally overtake them--a slip, an acci-
dent, and the law claims her own.


Gilbert fastened to secure his
horse, and the insensible form of
Curly Bill was again carried into
the store, where an examination
revealed broken head, and a frac-
tured leg, which would detain
their prisoner as effectually as
shackels and chains.


In a few days the Sheriff came
up from st. Joseph, and took charge
of the MANNED man, and through
his confession, many of his gang of
desperadoes were taken or killed,
and the country freed of their pres
ence.


Charley Gilbert received his well
earned reward, and the money en-
abled him to complete his house
handsomely and stock the farm,
over which Sarah Gilbert presides
as mistress.
Year: 1876

A certain Oregan professor was


a very fatherly sort Of q man, par


ticularly towards his young lady
pupils. Whenever a young lady
would ask question he would
place his hand lovingly on her head
and make considerable more fuss
than was necessary. OF course the
girls got tired of this and conspir-
Ell to break him of his fatherly pro-
clivities. One of them hit upon a
plan. She fixed a nice little pin
cushion, had the pins inserted so
that they would stand on their
heads, point upward, and then ad-
justed the Internal machine on the
top of her head, covering it with
just enough hair to hide it from
view. This done, she left her seat
during the session, walked demure-
ly up 10 the professors desk, stood a
moment in his august presence, and
then, in a meek and plaintive tone
of voice, she asked him for the in-
formation whether Washington
crossed Delaware on ice or on horse
hack when he left Trenton. He
raised his hand over her head and
soothingly said, "Why, my dear
child" Well have to end this
sentence therefor the balance Of
the exclamation was a sort of haf
howl, half whoop, which we can
neither write or print. Just as he
said "child" he lowered his hand
caressingly but forcibly upon the
crown of the girls head, and the
whole surface Of his extended palm
felt the tickling and exhilarating
sensations of a couple of dozen Of
pin points.
Year: 1876

Daniel Drcw's curious testimony, which
shows that he kept no books of account for
his complicated stock transactions makes it
probable that this was one of his habits as
drover which he has kept up through life. In
partnership suit between two drovers,
brought in this city some years ago, the
evidence was that they made " wad" of the
money which each originally put into the con-
ccrn. Whichever acted as the buyer of cattle
sometimes one and sometimes the other
carried the "wad !" each put into it what he
received, and each drew from it what no
spent. After some years, they divided the
"wad" equally. That was all there was of
their system of bookkeeping.
Year: 1876

Political spectators within the past two or
three days have been full of n new possibii-
ity. Blaine, they argue, is likely to be de-
feated by his prominence, and the consequent
union of all his opponents. But in defeat
it is held that he would still have
ample power to prevent the nomination
of any of his rivals. A new man,
therefore would be necessary, and who so
good or so unexceptionable as Elibu j. Wash
burne? He was a Republican from the
first. He was always against rail
roads, against subsidies, against land
grants, against jobs of every sort and
description. He made his long Congressional
career one continual campaign against corrup-
ton and in favor of economy. He discovered
Gen. Grant. He has been ont of the country,
and so separated from all the scandals of
Grants Administration. Ho won the hearts
of the Germans by his devotion to
their countrymen during the siege of
Paris and when he goes in he has
a habit of winning. Altogether, the political
SPECTATORS make strong showing of it-for
man who at present is without delegate !;
and there is getting to be good deal of talk
ON the subject.
Year: 1876

At last it looks little as if some Of the
mud thrown at Mr. Blaine might stick. There
is nethng in the testimony of the witness
Muligan calculated to produce much effect,
excepting in the matter of the private letters.
These Mr.. Blaine must in some way promptly
explain. 1t was natural enough that he should
object to Mulhgan's use of them and should de-
mand possession. They clearly belonged either to
the man to whom they were sent or to the
man who wrote them. Mulligan had no right
to them, and it is equally clear that no man is
wiling to have his private correspondence
with friends stolen and its publication by
his enemies threatened. But the public, in
this case, will not consider these technical
points. Some explanation about the letters
is Indispensable, or it will be believed
that they conceal something which
will not bear the light. Manifestly
Mulligan and his kind are being put forward
in the desperation of gigantic political strug-
gle, by men who hope to keep the hated rival
from clutching the prize. 1t is fast becoming
the ordeal by fire. All the same, Blaine must
bear it or go down.
Year: 1876

The sagacity of the London police in the
conspiracy case was confirmed yesterday by
the conviction of both Ellen Since, who was
charged with intending to commit suicide, and
William X. Vance, who offered to provide her
with poison that would defy subsequent de-
lection. An unclaimed letter from Vance to
Since, opened at the poSt-office, WAS the only
clew which the police had to this singular
affair. Their skill in unraveling the mystery
might be wisely emulated in this city, where
the list of undiscovered criminals is long.
Year: 1876

The combat thickens in the railroad war;
Yesterday the New-York Central put down its
Western passenger fares to those OF the Erie
and is said also to have begun cutting freight
rates.
Year: 1876

II 1t shall prove that the Woodln Charter
bin has failed to receive the Governors sig


nature-as seemed probable at late hour last
night--there will no doubt be ample reason
given for this decision. Closer Investigation Oh
Year: 1876

The revival at Wesley Chapel sftM
continues and the attendance last evsn-
ing was the largest since the beginning
Of these interesting meetings. About
eighty have united with the church this
month, and nearly one hundred and my
since the meeting began. Service 20
night and during the coming week.
Year: 1876

"A dull minister in the pulpit is sore
trial, but the soprano in the choir is usual
ly a soarer.


The difference between ingenious and
ingenious is illustrated by the difference
between can do, and candid.


Spring is time when the woman Of
the house tears up, and the man of the
house tears around.-Ddn. Nelcs
Year: 1876

Speculation continues rife concerning the
probable choice to be made by the Cover
nor in filling the vacant Chief Justiceship.
This is natural and certainly not improper,
when the importance to the people of the
functions discharged by the presiding judge
of our Courts is remembered. The integri-
ty and ability of the Judiciary are the COM
mon concern of all citizens, and while the
appointment now to be made falls to the
hands Of the Governor, he is acting upon
it, not for himself nor for the party by
which he was himself elected, but for the
whole people. There should be before
him, therefore, only one consideration, and
that is the inquiry whose appointment will
constitute the best assurance of faithful,
able, and honest administration of
course, any service of merely personal
or party ends, and the Governor, in address
sing himself to the important duty at hand,
must find, if he keeps his eye single to the
one purpose of serving the high demands
of pure and able Judiciary, that any 9TH
er suggestions to guide his selection are
japgling interferences.


We are encouraged by information which
reaches us concerning the Governors frame
of mind to hope for such an appointment
as will meet the approval of all good peo-
Pile. 1t is said that he feels deeply the Sc.
riousness of the duty before him, and does
not mean to dismiss it hastily. We hope
therefore that he will succeed in doing hon
or not only to himself but to the State, in
the selection to be ultimately made.
Year: 1876

Been in general use for twenty years. Everywhere
proved the most SAFE, SIMPLE, ECONOMICAL,
and EFFICIENT medicines known. They just
what the people want, saving time and money avert
ing sickness and suffering Each single specific the
well tried prescription of an eminent physician
Year: 1876

On Monday, the West Chester Local Ne,os
appeared in an enlarged form. We thought
it very good-quite good enough for the
money-before, and if it shows even great
or excellence how shall we do justice to it {?
The Ne,0s now seems to us quite as large
as can be proftably printed for cent.
Year: 1876

One of the things that the people will in
sist upon having this year is Mayor of
their own. They are tired Of the my can
didate" kind. They do not want and will
not have one of John Kellys Mayors. There
fore that calm and generous patriot, when
he contemplates his treasures, when he
opens the little closet in which he keeps his
beautiful candidates, to reflect which one of
them he will give to the city next year, may
as well cease to trouble his brains about it.


He may lock up his little closet, put the key
on the upper shelf and wait for another year.


His candidates are beautiful no doubt-as
we'll those that are made of painted clay as
those that are only of dried putty but
the insuperable objection is that they are his
candidates and not the peoples candidates.
The principle Of democratic government Is
Year: 1876

To borrow the style of the almanacs of
the last generation we might say, "About
this time look out for deaths caused by eat
ing mushrooms" There is a crop of these
casualties every year, and they may be put
down in the category of regularly recurring
events 1t is very dangerous indulgence
to eat mushrooms gathered in the field s; SO
dangerous that it may we'll be doubted
whether the qualification of the palate is
worth the peril. There are several hundred
varieties of mushrooms. Some few of these
are edible, but by far the larger
number are poisonous, and these
are classed together under the COM
mon name of toadstools There are
plenty of people everywhere who believe
they know the difference between toadstools
or poisonous mushrooms and edible mush-
rooms but those who have made thorough
study of these fungi declare that none of the
common and popular tests are to be de-
pended upon, and that there is no general
test that is absolutely certain. They even
hold that mushrooms of an edible variety
may be terminated in conditions which will
render them poisonous. Mushrooms raised
in the beds of q cultivator from the spawn
of mushrooms known to be edible are the
only ones that it is entirely safe to eat.
Year: 1876

Comptroller Green is model public SER
want. He never balks or hesitates. He is
always ready to. serve, and to serve any,
where. If the people want him he is at
hand, ready to do his best for them in any
Office which they, or any of them, want to
give him. Nothing but the loss of his
health will ever deprive the city of New
York of Mr.. Green's invaluable services.
We have this in his own consolatory words
to the delegation Of contractors who on
Wednesday waited upon him to offer him
their support for the Mayoralty.


BY the way, this notion Of the body of con-
tractors for city work nominating Mr.. Green
is it not q little funny? Mr.. Peter Cooper's
nomination was thought joke. It remains
the joke of the Presidential campaign, ex-
cept, perhaps, to the Western politicians,
who see WITH vexation that though Mr.
Cooper has not the least chance of being
elected he demoralizes the forces of both
parties In plain language, he cannot make
a spoon but he may spoil either of two
horns. We do not mean to say that Mr..
Green's candidature would be like that
of Mr. Cooper. Mr.. Green could at least
count on the support Of the contractors; and
they are influential people


It occurs to us that as Mr. Green is willing
to be Mayor, and as he seems to have ideas
on the subject of the improvement of the
city, on which, to our regret, he only gen.
eralized in his address to the contractors, he
might do we'll to put them in shape, and let
the people of New York see them. There is
a curious and somewhat stale formality of
'letters of acceptance" by Presidential can
didates, written after everybody knows they
are going to accept, and when their plat
forms have already. been prescribed for them.
Why could not Mr.. Green, by daring in
novation, write and publish letter of &C.
ceptance before he is nominated? The idea
strikes us as excellent It would attract
public attention as novelty; and in such q
preliminary and provisional letter of accept
ance-provisional only because if he were
not nominated it would of course not bind
him to anything-he might lay out pro-
gramme of city improvement for the public
information. We should very much like to
see such document. 1t might be indexed


proposals for assuming the Mayoralty of
New York"
Year: 1876

The theatre which from old associations is
most endeared to our playgoers has opened
its season brilliantly with little piece
which, while it departs somewhat from the
usual style of entertainment at that house,
is 80 amusing that it thoroughly justifies the
choice of the management. forbidden
Fruit" is, of course, inspired by lie
Process Veauradieux," which is now being in
one shape or another played at SO many
theatres; but it owes much of its success to
the novel and ingenious treatment of Mr..
Boucicault. From end to end it "goes" with
the wit, spirit and fun of farce in the
Palais Royal, and roars of laughter reward
the efforts of corps of actors and actresses
who are all admirably suited. Mr.. Bouci-
cault's marvellous knowledge of stage effect
has never been more humorously exhibited
than in the extraordinary complications
which await the actors in this piece, who
propose to make night of it at Cremorne.
At period when so many are feeling the
stringency of hard times bright trife like
Forbidden Fruit" will do no little good in
dispelling the shadows of care. 1t may not
be weighted with moral lessons, but it is full
of generally harmless fun, and cannot be
witnessed without enjoyment. When piece
can be heartily laughed over there should
be great deal forgiven to the author Peo-
pie complain of Boucicault's plagiarism as
the politicians did to Abraham Lincoln of
General Grants exalted appreciation of whis-
key. 1t is plagiarism that wins triumphs
on the stage just as General Grant won bat
ties on his whiskey during the war. If it is
only the right. kind of plagiarism or the
right kind of whiskey all is well. This
brings us to paradox, for Boucicault with
all his insistance on the right to plagiarize,
has found another authors work for once to
be forbidden Fruit.