Year: 1873

now. 1t will be settled in it's own good time,
even if we are compelled to take Cuba for
ourselves.


The Private Bargaintngs OF Euchu


Diplomacy.


Our great Buchu diplomat, whom we intro
duced to the public yesterday in his proper
colors, sometimes plays very sinister game
This occurs when he has succeeded in COM
municating his plan to the diplomat of
foreign country with which America has a
difficulty. 1t is not every diplomat who
would stoop SO low as to take part in
such degrading exercises as Secretary Buchu
would propose It is not every diplo-
mat who would consent to make the
honor of his nation scarecrow, ''a thing of
shreds and patches" without body or soul.
But the diplomat who would act q leading
part in one of Secretary Buchu's farces must
do this. The Buchu diplomat, like the Scotch
beggar of Burns cantata, has no scruples for
his part. His motto is, "Let them cant about
decorum who have characters to lose;"
and his argument with the other diplo-
mat amounts to this :-'.If you only
knew how comfortably I can get
along without dignity you would see the
force of Falstaffs philosophy, that honor is
nothing 'to him that died O. Wednesday, Let
us get up little stir upon proper under
standing that nothing but ink shall be shed,
and you and shall be the best of friends and
keep our places; this last, I take it, being
the great object all diplomats should have in
view" If this argument is successful the for
eign diplomat speedily becomes, to all ap-
pearance, o very naughty and passionate fellow
indeed Secretary Buchu fires off dispatches
which make the welkin ring; he faunts our
flag in the face of the Buchuized foreign
diplomat. The short sighted people are
thrown completely off their guard. The
whole thing they imagine, must be in
earnest for they behold the Buchuized
foreigner hurting back defiance at a
fearful rate Unused to anything like
backbone" in Secretary Buchu, they are
convinced that the national honor is safe in
his keeping for once. He takes every occa-
sion to tell everybody that as a guardian of
national dignity he is without a peer. His
brow becomes terrible, but as the public
cannot see his 'lily liver" it cannot fathom
the disreputable fantasy of Buchu. Public in
dignaton, which has been excited by fiendsh
outrage, is at high pitch. Our flag has been
insulted, our citizens murdered and our ships
captured. Men meet each other in the street and
the first thing on their lips is the expression
e g. 4 -
reparation be obtained. The wrong suffered
is one that cannot be endured unrequited
The calm, dispassionate men, who are gener-
ally behind the populace in the expression OF
strong opinion, become emphatic in their cry
for prompt reparation. The country
blazes with the sense Of an un-
righted wrong. Secretary Buchu is
now in his glory His flaming de-
spatches are evoking fiery rejoinders from
the Buchuized foreigner, and in the cool Of
the evening Buchu and the foreign diplomat
meet like rival lawyers or Misunderstanding
country editors, with sniggers and sneers
over bottle or two Of iced champagne.
Then they talk over their plan. 1t is
now time to bring the goodly Buchuism





into full play. "You see, my dear Don,"
says Buchu, 1--WE must begin to tone
down. I'll abate my demands tomorrow, and
you must become reasonable the day after.
Then, for home consumption, shall make
the eagle scream over your temperatures, and
be still more pacifcatory the day following
You must then accede loftily to about one
quarter of my original demands, and shall
howl over the victory. We shall fix the day
for the apology at o year from now, and you
can scuttle the steamer or have her burned.
You had better let the prisoners escape, and,
if / am compelled to ask the degradatlon
Of the murderer, You may reprimand him and
move him somewhere else, with promotion.
Will you have little more ice with yours p
But the plans Of Buchu must share the vics-