Year: 1875




should have to pay for it before he haC
done. Nevertheless the day of payment
gave no sign of dawning, and Jack went
on stalking and landing, backing the
right color and the winning horse, as il
he had private Nostrodamus at his ell
bow, and could read the future as other
men could read the past.


/ dare say many of my readers will
laugh at me for the confession, but had
never seen q race until Jack Langhorne
took me down to the Derby on his drag.
1t was day both of great enjoyment
and great excitement TO me, for under
his auspices netted fifty pounds. and l
felt millionaire. / was wild with
pleasure perhaps, too, the champagne
counted for something in my hilarity, as
1 took home to Edith sixth of my year
ly income, made in fewer hours than it
took me to earn my paltry diurnal
guinea. Visions of fortune, golden and
bright, passed before my eyes, and al
ready l saw Edith queening it in the
park with her housekeeping bays and
faultless turnout. She should have
everything money could command.
Whatever else my visions showed me she
was always foremost in my thoughts and
highest in my hopes.


But when | gave her the money she
turned away from me coldly, and a min
ute after had buried her face in the pill
low of the sofa where she was lying and
was sobbing. / was good deal sur
prised, a little shocked, and greatly
hurt had better use the harsher word
and say vexed-at this outburst. did
not see the good of it, and did not un-
derstand it. Beside, it chills man so
painfully to be received with coldness
and tears after such day as l had
spent 1t makes the contrast between
life inside and outside the home too
sharp, and only sends him further off
instead of drawing him nearer. How
ever, tears were too scarce yet for me
to disregard or withstand them, so /
kissed my wife and did my best to soothe
her, and by degrees brought her round
so far that she LETT off crying and began
to kiss the baby, as if it was something
quite new and she had never kissed it
before.


Though 1 was sorry to see her cry,
this vexed me again. She had not seen
me all the day, and she had had the boy.
/ thought she might have paid little
attention to the one who mad been alb
sent, to put it on no other ground.


But when / demonstrated she only
answered : 81 know, George, you do
not care for baby. You never have
cared for him, and if it were not for me
he might die of neglect"


L began to laugh at this. 1t struck
me as too comical that a wife should
reproach her husband for not taking care
of the baby; for surely if there is such
a thing as "wOman's s work" in the world,
and they are not meant by nature and
the eternal fitness of things TO be sol
diers and sailors and lawyers and doc
tors and the Lord knows what beside,
that work is to be found in the home and
the nursery. But she was angry when
l laughed, and raising herself on her
elbow drew a picture of the infamy,
ruin, degradation that was to follow on
my taking to bad courses, founded on
my not caring for baby and my having
won ESQ at the Derby, and / seemed
to be listening to a maniac, not the
Edith 1 had left in the morning and
had loved for SO long. Perhaps / was too
impatient, and ought to have remember
ed that if / found my life dull hers was
not too gay; ought to have made al
lowance for the morbid nervousness and
brooding fancies of woman left alone
for the whole day; but ] was younger
then than / am now, and the thing end
ed by our having our first grave quarrel,
wherein we were both silly, both un-
just, and neither of us would give way.


The bad blood made between us to-
night grew worse as time went on; and
the circle we were in was a vicious one.
/ kept away more and more from home,
because my wife made il too miserable
for me 10y her coldness, her tears, her
complaints, her ill-humor: and the more
/ kept away the more / resented it.
She took an almost insane hatred and
suspicion of my friends and my actions,
and did not scruple to accuse me and
them of vices and crimes because ] was
often late, from no worse cause than
playing pool and billiards. Her re-
proaches first wearied and then hardened
me; and by degrees a kind of fierce feel
ing took possession of me-a kind Of
revengeful determination that / would
be what she imagined me to be, and
give her cause TO denounce me as she
did.


Harmless amusements became amuse-
ment not so harmless; petty little stakes
of crown and a shilling grew to gold;
the glass of beer became the glass of
brandy-and more than one and the
faciliS descensus had one more self
directed victim on its slippery way.
Work was intolerable to me. What /
did did badly, and / shirked all / could.
/ was often late, as often left too early;
and my employers were really good and
lenient. As it was, however, wearied
out their patience, and they demonstrated
with me firmly but kindly.


This sobered me for q moment; but
had gone too far to retreat; until i came
out at the other side must go on.


The fortune which had so long be-
friended Jack Langhorne deserted him
now, and with his fortune his nerve.
Where he had staked with judgment he
now backed wildly, recklessly, and the
more he lost the more recklessly he staked.
His misfortune seemed to influence
mine. Hitherto ! had been immensely


A Il. Il. Il 1o., "a