Year: 1873

1t does not make any difference
whether your name is Keyser or not
if you want to buy q dog there is one
for sale cheap on a canal-boat now
Drawing the billows somewhere east of
Frankfort. The captain of the boat is
an Oswego man, and it is but one sbart
week since he spliced bis main-braee
and let out the reefs in his driver, and
got three sheets in the wind, and made
all necessary preparations for pros
porous voyage His wife sung "Write
me Letter, Love-" in the cabin, his
children played on deck his steeds
aired their frames on the tow. path, his
hand was on the Iudder, and his mate
was recovering from his farewell attack
of delerium tremens in the forward
cabin. The captain gazed proudly
around him, and could think of moth
ing necessary to complete his happi-
ness but his wife, wiser than he,
thought they needed a dog-a nice
Newfoundland-to play with the chill.
dren, fish them out when they fell in
the canal, and watch the deck hands
when the captain was off after grocer
les.


Coming through Utica yesterday,
the captain bought nice Newfound-
land dog. He got him at a bargain /;
in fact, he got him for nothing, so to
speak, because the man who owned the
dog was not around at the time the
bargain was made. The captain had
the dog, but still he was not happy.
The dog had way of barking at pass
ing crafts, end so drew upon his cap
taip's boat frequent showers of coal and
wood, and he would dive down the
steep steps into the cabin, Suddenly,
and upset the captains wife. Once he
lit on the table and spoiled pound of
butter, and he was altogether too play
full


Yesterday the captain, who is a pi-
Gus man, tied up, and put out his
plank just east of this city, and started
with his children to &c to the park and
to observe the day after the manner of
this vicinity. The dog started. and as
soon as he got on shore he began to
caper and wag his tail, and so wagged
one of the children fat on his blessed
back. The baby yelled and the captain
made Fnme tender remarks as he set it
on its feet, and some other remarks as
he shoQk bis fist at the dog. The dog
misunderstood the man, and came run
ming back, full of fun, and made .
jump to lick his face. He missed the
man, but he knocked the other child
into the canal, and the father, without
waiting to make any remarks, jumped
in after it. The dog, being to the wa
ter born, knew just what to do, and he
went cavorting on TO get good head
way, barking to himself at every jump,
and Just as the man got to the top OF
the water with his darling child, the
dog took a flying leap of about twenty
feet and struck on top of the man.
The water that man spurted around
was boiling hot with the oaths he sput-
tered with it, and his wife pranced
around on the deck Of the boat, aDd
flung a pole to the old man, which the
dog promptly dragged and pulled
ashore, and that captain was nearly
drowned before he trod the sod again.


The dog is an intelligent animal
very intelligent, indeed and Just as
soon as he saw that mariners face he
knew that something was wrong so
he skunk up the plank on board. The
captain gathered what loose granite
and lumber he could in a hurried and
earnest search, and marched up the
plank, the grimmest figure of Neptune
sveT done in Mohawk Valley mud. AS
soon as he got on board he opened a
hot fire on the dog, and that sagacious
brute went yelping through the for
ward hatch and struck the bunk, where
the mate lay musing ehput the devil.
Whom the mate saw the dog he thought
the evil one had come for him him
sure enough, and he braced himself
for the last fight, SO that when the cap
tain jumped down in pursuit of the
dog there was mutual misunderstood.
ing all around. The captains wife
looked down and tried to explain, but
there was a confused whirl pool of bunk
boards, and hair, and bedding, and
legs and arms, with an occasional in.
fusion Of dog, that it seemed idle to
waste her hFeath in talking to such a
circus.


To-day the boy of that fated craft
cuts the waters solemnly, and at the
helm stands the wreck of that captain,
fastened together with strips of plas-
ter, and smelling of liniment, and ever
and anon he surrenders the rudder to
his wife, while he goes forward to ham.
mer detected dog which is for sale,
or to listen to the rawlings of the mani
ac confined under the forward hatch
-Utiea Herald.