smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1871

A MEDICAL JoKE.-An exchange
says: The worst joke that was ever
perpetrated on scientific men took
place recently at Louisiana, Mo. A
man was sick with rheumatism, or
something, and a fellow went around
to the doctors and professors and
things, and told them that it was the
queerest case on record. He said the
man had no feeling. YOucould stick !,
pinsin his body all over, and he paid
no attention to them at all. He was
perfectly numb. So the doctors got
together and called on the sick man
to experiment. All arrived with pins
and needles and bodkins.a The man
was asleep, and they got around hun,
and each one stuck his pin in the pa
tient. The sick man rolled over and
looked at the crowd, and thought they
had come to dissect him, SO he tooka a
chair in. one hand and a bed post in
the other, and drove. the crowd
thence. They'are around with their
heads tied up, looking for the man
who said that sick man had nofeel-
inp
Year: 1871

PROPERTY QUALIFICATION TO VoTE
FOR COUNTY STATE SBNAroR.-Ii
the press and leading men of this
State would advocate this measure
in. our opinion it would be made g
part Of the Constitution. Its justice
and fairness and necessity, to pro:
tect the property and taxpayers o.
the State, is SO obvious that we be.
lieve it would not be strenously op-
posed by the influential men of the
political majority in South Carolina
It would wrong no one, and leave
every citizen with the full rights Of
suffrage for every other representa-
tive and officer of the State and the
United States,t that he nov possesses. II
would only secure the great, princi-
pie Of taxation and representation
united, the principle upon which the
republic of the United State was
originally founded. Now is a favo-
rable time to agitate this measure
before the people. 1t will test the
sincerity Of those who profess q
willingness to protect all classes, and
who pronounce. themselves opposed
to corruption. The late taxpayers
convention ignored ths proposition
Cumulative voting seemed to betheil
only plan, but that will fail to. accom-:
plish the end desired, although good
+ NAV come of it.-Greenville Enter
prise.
Year: 1871

7ate individuals or mining or manu-


featuring companies, vii most Ger


tainly be Of narrow gauge, for those


who construct railways as part oi


their "plant, and not as separate


speculations, are wise enough to see


that broad gauge lines gre much toe


expensive to be ihdulggsa in: Hence


the necessity that The main i line should


be a narrow gauge raiillWag; the traffic


of the branch lines must pass to and
from it without transfer,. without
break of gauge, or time will be lost
and expense inquired, SMc6 will mill
tate considerably aggaaiinSitt agaiiSt the utility
Of the railway. n.


This question Of branch lines is a
highly important one, ana am anx-
Eiols that it should not be overlooked.
If a railway e company viii take care
to lay down such main a road that
branches may be run into it at COM
paratiyely small expense they may
safely calculate that feeders will be
constructed all along HsEoute. Every
little watershed Of industry, so to
speak, will send down itariYulet, and
a full flow of traffic will roll along
the main stream. Iflon the other
hand, the, gauge ofasmain line be
such that connections With it can only
be made at a large cossthe sources. of
traffic will necessarily be confined to
the narrow strips which lie along
either side of the r1ad, and the regio IS
beyond will neither BE benefited
themselves nor.oontribdte to the divi-
dends Of the shareholders.


AS to the main linekitself, I need
scarcely point out thai if a narrow
gauge railway can be CONSTRUCTED at
about half the cost ola broad gauge
line, the same capitalwifl Scommand
the traffic Of doublssthe length of
country. A thousand5miles Of road
can be built when otherwise only five
hundred could be built and the case
will be exactly parallel with that of
a man who can keep two shops going
instead Of one; if suehsa man can't
make his fortune the faster he. has no
one to blame but himself.


In a territory only partially deyel-
oped the narrow eS,system offers
an easy solution of. a difficulty which
must otherwise! be. Alt. Over. the
water you are enabled by a sort of
prophetic gift toqtermseven your vii
lagos cities. You are we'll assured
that before many yearaare over they
will be cities in reality as well in
name. Meanwhile, daling the period
of growth, however briet that may
be, are they to be'without railways,
destitute of the very Chief cause Of
progress? Or is a.heavy capital
to be idle for some years whilst the
railway waits for the increase of pop
ulation and the growth Of industy? ?
The narrow gauge system, | say, at
fords the answer: a thousand miles,
Of such territory may support rail
way when FIVE -hnnd hcolld not.
In my next letter Ipropose. with
your permission, to show how it is
that one thousand miles of narrow
gauge can be constructed at the same
cost as FIVE hundred miles of broad
gauge.
Year: 1871

They use guano down in Alabama
to coax the crops along, and the man


who sells the best guano gets the
most trade. There is one kind that
is awful soon. a farmer put a sam
ple Of it in his pocket and started for
home. There was carpet tack in
his pocket when he put the guano in
there, and when he got home there
was wa, 4 bar Of railrosd iron sticking
outof his pocket which almost weighed
his horse down. he said he though
he felt sonething heavy in his pocket
the sthalf Of the journey 1fsom.
papers told this story, no one would
believe it. .,.Els- 3!
Year: 1871

The Dangers of the Rich and tho Temptn.
tons of the Poer-Lecture on Aaur's
Prayer by the Rev. DIR. John Hall.


The incement weather OF yesterday did not pre-.
vent large congregation from assembling to take
part In the morning services at the above place or
worship.


After the usual praise and prayer the Rev. Dr.
Hall announced that he proposed that morning to
lecture on the first nine verses OF the hrtieth chap
ter OF Proverbs wherein Agur makes confession OF
his 1aith and prays The reverend DOCTOR In alluu-
ing to Agurs profound sense OF his own feebleness
and the limits Of his knowledge, said that at first
sight one might suppose this to be
AN ovER-MoDEsT ACKNOWLEDGEMENT,
but 1t had been said or an eminent Grecan philoso-
pher tnat the noblest thing he ever said was:-
"There is but thing know, and that is that
know nothing" The higher the range to which
man is enabled 10 ascend the broader and the
wider does the region appear to him which he
prayer he said-Tne world hides its real
and transient nature ana passes Itself OF
many were deceived and begulled BY It's appear
ance. This was seen eyeryWh here, most OF all III the
great cities, where so many things are seen, OF
which the truth about them is that they are false;
SO they had splendid families splendid houses and
splendid churches that locked to be very wealthy,
but really were very poor; so they had an inflated
currency, SO they had false compliments, false
speeches, false courtesles, false ciyiltes and so





have acquired


COMPANY MANNERs,n
and are drilled in some degree to lessons OF duplic
ty. II was all gded exterior and tinsel. Some
times men spoke of "the dangerous classes" IL was
as proper for them to speak of the endangered
classes. In the course Of his remarks under this
branch OF the subject he spoke OF the dangers Of
the rich, and IN forcible manner contrasted these
with the dangers and temptations Incidental to the
poor. There were some portions OF this Continent
where there was SO much water that they were con-
verted into


DISMAL SWAMI


There were other portions where there was such
lack OF water that when the summer weather came
the land was converted into waste of unproductive
DUST What good thing II would be II the super
fluffy Of water could be conducted from those dis
NAL swamps and spread those dusty praires
ana thus leave both fruitful and save both from the
peculiar drawbacks TO their usefulness, and he
thought what happy thing it would be II


THE TWO CLASSES
could be brought together In such a way that the
fulness of the one should be check upon The pow
erty OF the other. He believed that was possible.
What good shing it would oe If Influences Ike
these were brought continually before their minds
and If their superfuity could so flow over to the
poor that they should not only be saved from need
but also from temptation. Freely they had received,
freely they should give.
Year: 1871

But ;or the cheering fact that the piety Of New
1orkers is not simply skin deep, but rests upon the
sure basis OF heartfelt convection, the almost un-
broken succession OF wet and disagreeable Sabbaths
we have had during the past couple or months
would have long ago consigned TO desuetude all our
religious habits and made public prayers and praise
forgotten occupations. Going 10 church has become
as pcrilous and more than quite as costly
duty as It was IN the days or our grim
old Puritan ancestors, who had to pass to the meet
ing house through a gauntlet OF Indian rites. We
are rewarded for attending church 10y catching our
death OF cold and the spelling OF best clothes
Monday morning is, indeed, now, ike the morning
after great ball, and there are long faces ana
querulous walls OF anguish in the Doudoirs OF the
city when the heads Of families have gone down
town and the ladies are free 10 gather together and
gaze with fearful eyes upon the ruin wrought by the
previous days visit 10 the temple. Plety Is get
ting to be as expensive luxury as worldly
dissipation. and change in Sabbath weather Is i'm
peratiyey called for, unless the interests or the
Church are TO be seriously injured. Many worship
pers, it Is to be feared, look upon attendance at
place OF worship merely sort OF insurance pre-.
MUM to be paid Tor admission to the kingdom OF
heaven, and this class OF persons viii soon decide
that the present price OF security is too high And
that these 'ine weather. Christians are sadly
numerous


Yesterday was certainly the most disagreeable
Sunday for long time. Heavy RAIN rude winds
and low, heavy SKY made The journey to the tenn
pie indeed a Lenten penance. The churches were
therefore with few exceptions, but very sparsely
filed. The pulpits were, however, occupied as
usual, ard, as VIII be seen from the reports below
the shepherds OF the Lord Numbered out sound
doctrine and sparkled with holy VIII, ana grew per-
suasive with melting appeals or pious rhetoric in
their accustomed instructive and interesting man.
ner.
Year: 1871

many. Gold will buy great many things, but what
YOU want most OF all cannot be bought or sold.
pleasure in your work. study the tnnueace OF your
trade or profession over society; put your own
dignity OF character into the work you do and the
time Will come when the world VIII need you. he
willing to be Slow haste and temptation were born
OF the same mother. The man who Is in o hurry
Will not stop to consider right wrong. II you are
determined to do your life work In ten years you
will certainly make botcn OF It. "Make haste
finally, rely on religious principle. Justice and
honesty will rise In the end. Sef-respect, the
result or religious conviction, Is your best armOr.
The man Of God Is more than the equal OF the man
OF the world Be patient be true, be pure, be just,
and you have nothing to fear.
Year: 1871

No trade is less honorable for being
odd. A good many boys We know
would hardly have the courage to be
angle worm merchants; but SO long as
there is nothing better to do, it is as
good q way as any TO turn an honest
penny.


A gentleman who had been visiting the
White Mountains, on his way down saw
boy on the stage box, with q box 6l!ed
with earth.


"Whst have you there, my little boy p


"Worms."


Worms What are you going to Dc
with them p


"Sell them for two cents. The fisher
men cant get them in the lower part o.
the mountains, and so 90 up the valley
here, and dig them, and bring them dowr
aud sell them"


but how do you Psy for such q lon;
Nsge ride 1"
Year: 1871

THAT DEAD Boron SATURDAY
morning last news came from IN


noble Valley that the body Of some
unknown person had been found in
that vicinity, and that il was rerr
important that the Coroner should
summon jury and proceed thither
with all possible dispatch and ascor-
tain the reason why such dead
person should be deprived Of life. ii
such information came within the
cognizance OF said jury. After sun
dry preliminaries, one of Dorsey 5
four. in hand teams was obtained and
Year: 1871

Next week the Republican voters will meet at
Convention, and vote upon the manner of max
Ing nominations. The party Just now ais going
slow and learning to peddle." This is ss it
ought to be. The enemy is strong enough to
take advantage of any serious error we may
commit, and our recollection of the past ought
to convince us that every opportunity of that
sort will be improved. To be sure and have
things go right we say to the voters send your
best men to the Convention already called.
Next let us do away with the Crawford Plan
It is burden and incubus on the party that
we must not undertake to carry any longer.
We notice that several other counties stimulated


thereto by the efforts of the Sacramento Union,
are adopting this system. One trial will let the
| thing out with them as 1t has with us. We ask
the voters TO take an interest in the Primaries
soo2 coming off. 1t is one of the preliminaries
to the grand struggle to eliminate on the sixth
of September next. The political complexion of
the county and State administrations and one
member of Congress, are involved. 1t is time
we were girding up our loins and preparing for
the strife. We say to the Union Republi-
can voters of this county that casting our eyes
over the State we gee much to encourage us in
the hope of brilliant success. The pulse of
the party beats strong and regularly. There is a
generally expressed determination that we must
win this time that we must have no dissension
must be harmonized and put forward our best
men. This is the way Republicans talking
throughout the State, and we rejoice to announce
that Old Trinity is pervaded from one end TO the
other by the same sentiment. While Republi-
cans confident and eager for the fray, there
are no local strifes or embttered personal con-
tests between them, aside from such as inevta-
bly, result from the Crawford system. One and
all, realizing the consequences of discord in our
ranks the Republicans Of this State insisting
that there must be no strife inside our organiza-
tion, and that the best men of the party shall be
put in nomination everywhere. We think that
this feeling, if encouraged, is bound to win, and
that in this county, so far as the ensuing nomin-
ations to be made, the best men will be found
the most available. Let us take care we do not
put up any candidate below the Jeffersonian
stahuuu' MORO OF less poilcy snould pe e1er-
cised in framing State or county ticket, and
the representation of every wing and faction of
the party is the object sought to be obtained.
This year, however, there is nothing of this sort
to be provided for. The Republican party of
this county is bone and sinew organization
with no hangers on or purchased adherents


There is no gasconading but a quiet determine
ton on our part to put forward our best men
and elect them. Voters, to the end that there be
thorough organization and concert of action, see
to il that every man goes to the primaries
Year: 1871

1.-THE MAN For SENAroR."-The West Coast
Signal, Of the Gath, copies our article with the
above heading and thus comments thereon


The JOURNAL editor is in the habit of saying
many timely and truthful things politically, but
has never uttered any more candid and deserved
than are contained in the above. We heartily
endorse each particular statement. Trinity
county, or the Senatorial District of which it is
part, does not contain a better man. There is
not citizen Of that county or Of the District bet
ter worthy Of preferment than John Martin.
Sixteen years personal knowledge of the man,
his worth, and his political acts, induces us to
say that there are none more deserving, and not
one in his section upon whom Republican strength
would so certainly center. We hope the party
will be wise enough to urge the nomination upon
him, and that he will, as in the past, forego per-
sonal interests to do for his party what we sin
cerely believe no other man can-insure the
election of a State Senator from Trinity and
Shasta. Wen go to Trinity and acquire res
dence to vote for you, John.
Year: 1871

IT has been proposed to invite Henry Ward
Beecher to deliver the opening address at the
coming State Fair. In view Of the fact that
Beecher has always desired to visit California,
it is very likely that he will accept such invita-
tion.
Year: 1871

The Yolo Mail complains that two or three
papers are claiming the honor of first introduc-
ing Newton Booth as the Republican candidate
for Governor, when, in fact, it was the first.
We believe the Mail is right.
Year: 1871

There is not remedial agent in this world that wilI
cure Fever and Age and all other Baiarous Bilious
Scarlet Typhoid yellow and other Fevers (aieed by
Railways Pills. so quick as Radway Ready Relief
Year: 1871

money more plentiful with ourselves than
with our neighbors. And this brings US
to another feature in the general estimate
which is worth considering The reten-
ton of the value of our crops at home
produces an easy money market, and
leads to rapid local improvement in the
way of railroads and other comforts.


The men who have too little money to go
to Saratoga stay at home and put their
funds out at interest. Heretofore the
planter has mortgaged his crop and kept
his money in the bank, refusing to allow
it to go out for the nouishment of his
neighbors and his vicinity. In the win
ter he skinned the land, and in the sum-
mer he spent his money among strangers.


New Orleans should take great atinterest
in the country, for every surplus dollar IN
the interior is only active in order to achieve
q competence which will be spent in the
city. As wealth increases IN the State it
will gravitate toward the emporium, and
men of means will follow it, Here is to
be the centre of pleasure, learning, ele-
gance and wealth. The country is rela-
lively poor at present, but it is growing
richer every day, and in the Pactolian
stream amplihes its growing volume, and


distributes with increasing fullness its
cleaning gold, the capacity Of New Or
leans to accept of and discharge brighter
destiny will be taxed beyondthe anticipa-
tons of those who prefgured her great
ness even from the stand point of 1850
Year: 1871

Judge E. w. Mason, of Ascension parish,
furnishes the gratifying information that in
a few days sixteen public schools will be in
full operation in his bailiwick, and that the
board has sufficient funds to run them for
six months at least. This is doing well
indeed; and looks as if the Judge was
determined to carry out his boast that
Ascension should be the banner school
parish OF, Louisiana. We want to hear
from other parishes on this subject.
Year: 1871

mining sales actually made is to look at
the stock book, which is inaccessible.
There are too many reports of sales,
which, when traced up, turn out moon
shine, too many for any one to build up
theory of the future of this paper.


The -four market is still dull, though q
larger amount was sold yesterday than
for many days before. Double extra now
rules at SIS rs.
Year: 1871

EEw ORLEANS, June %, 1871.
J. H. GARDNER, Agent Grover & Baker Sewing


Machine Company No. l82 Canal street, New


Orleans:


SIR-We are much in want OF two of your FAMILY
SEWING MACHINES, and propose to give You in
exchange for them, one each, Singer and Wheeler
& Wilson. If you accept our offer it will take from
us the last ef five of the other patterns of
machines that we have disposed of TO give place
to yours.


We have had much experience with several of
the leading Sewing Machines, and feel that we can
say, without injustice to any one that the


ELASTIC STITCH MACHINE


OF your Company's make is far superior to
any that we have used. Its simplicity,
small effort required to operate, and the great
strength and elasticity of its seam are qualities
we have never found equaled in any other. Since
the Introduction of your Sewing Machine into our
Asylum, it has always been the favorite with our
children, and often a source of much contention
among them as to who should have the privilege
of its use.


During the past two years we have had five of
your Sewing Machines in constant use, and large
quantities of work of every description for fami.
lies has been done on them. We have never had
any complaint from those for whom the work has
been done, but on the contrary much praise for
the beauty and perfection of the machine STITCHING
We most earnestly hope that you will accept our
proposition to exchange, and favor us by sending
your machines at the earliest opportunity


DIREcTREsS ST ELIZABETH ORPHAN ASYLUM
au23 3m 1t Up d
Year: 1871

ISFATUATED.-A young lady at an Ohio camp
meeting asked the prayers of the assembly be-
cause she could not set her eyes upon a certain
young man in her neighborhood, without feeling
as though she must hug him to death.
Year: 1871

In India when n horse can and will not draw,
instead of whipping, spurring or burning him as
is frequently the practice in more civilized coun-
tries, they quietly get rope and tying it to one
of the fore feet, one or two men take hold of it,
and advancing few PAGES ahead of the horse
pull their best No matter how stubborn the
animal may be, few doses of such treatment
effect perfect cure.
Year: 1871

A CoNSEcTIcUT lawyer, who wished to cross
the river on the ice, was told that il would be
entirely safe if he crawled over on his knees.
Anxious to 60, he humbled himself accordingly,
and had laboriously got halc way across when
he was overaken by man driving lesurely in
Il buggy. The rapdty with which he assumed
an upright position was staeng to the driver
Year: 1871

From Wilkes Spirit OF the Times, Sept. 9l


There Is a little repose now among the yachtsmen
anu alter the splendid festivities, evoutOns, cele
Dratlons and races or the united squadrons In the
officers. brief respite from the duties they dis
charged with such courtesy and energy was also due
TO Commodore Bennett and the other officers Of the
CLUB. The management Of that body and the COM
mand OF the squadron were never before so able and
efficient as they are now. IL is eminently proper
that we should make this statement because it Is
well known that, not deeming the cluD iniallible,
we have sometimes disapproved or the measures 1t
IAN Old salt who thinks that we have
been in error IN calling the match between the
Harwich Club, as represented by the LlvOnia, and
the New York Club, race OF twelve heats. He
thinks 1t ought to be called match OF twelve dash
thinks that enough concessions have been made to
Mr. Ashbury, which Is what we have been asserting
1Or the last SIX months about every other week. 1f
thus Is an agreement to sail twelve races the New
YORK Yacht club can name any OF It's vessels for any
one OF the Twelve races. But do not think
in point. u A has twelve IN his stable. ana b,
undertakes to beat his whole sGabe with
one horse In twelve races, A cannot start
one OF his twelve twice. Each OF them must run
once. We are, upon furtner consideration, more
inclined 10 beheve that there Is no precedent which
Will properly apply TO this matter. lJ IS not analO
gous altogether TO anything on the turf; and Mr.
Ashoury mas applied Tor twelve races and the club
has agreed TO sail twelve for the settlement OF the
one subsiStlng match between the Harwicn Club and
ITSELF we now think that the New York Yacht Club
has the right to select any yacht to sail in any
Or all OF the races. The club need nave agreed
to sail the twelve times. IL never did agree, in Ia
thus select any one OF its yachts for any OF the
races.