Year: 1875

l AA1OS18AOe
Disputing the Legal Existence Of tho
Court,


The San Francisco Morning Call
says: 1t has been well remarked by
distinguished historian, that " for
ways that are dark and tricks that
are vain, the heather Chinee is pee
| uliar," and this wise, aphOrism must
he truthfully applied to the average
California attorney. A case in which
one Of this class figured occurred in
the municipal criminal court last
week. Mr.. Blank, a young attorney
of the last mentioned class, appeared
as counsel for a villainous looking
Chinaman, who was called to receive
sentence on his third conviction on
one charge OF grand larceny. All
Shook was told to stand up, and the
Judge gazed upon him with an eye in
which there was a varied assortment
of stern justice and COMMUNICATION.
Mr.. Blank slowly rose from his chair,
ran his bony fling rs through his raven
locks, and extending his right arm in
a dignified and authoritative manner,
signitied his intention Of making
little speech. s'1.|


81 PROPOSE" said Mr.. Blank, wav-
| ing his hand at the assembled specta-
tors with rare self possession, al
propose to contest the authority of
this court in the matter of the people
in the State Of California versus my
worthy and innocent client, All
Shook propose, may it please your
! hOnOr-and l don't think it will
propose to establish the fact that this
court has no authority and no legal
existence, and that all its acts since
its assumed organization have been
null and void and non compos mc,,tis.


"Hold OH, young man !" exclaimed
the court with a deprecatory motion
Of the judicial hand, "tbat game
won't play here worti, 4 cent. While
this court has the deal the percentage
remains in it's favor aud you needn't
think you can hog the game or bust
the bank. Maybe you think you're
playing it smart, but this court has
had its eye teeth filed, and sand
papered long ago, and all traces Of
vegetation have been carefully ex-
! tirpated from its opticular organs"
g May it please your honor" res
ponded Mr.. Blank, II have a long
line of authorities to present. HIRE
James, bring in the documents." At
these words !. little boy about three
feet high entered the courtroom bear
ing about fifty ponderous tones. :.


"Now, your honor" continued Mr..
Blank, move that the defendant
le discharged on the ground that the
court has no legal existence"


The court adjusted it's spectacles
and remarked gravely: "Yovng fol-
low there are times when patience
ceases to be virtue"


At this juncture the deputy sheriff
stood behind the attorney ready and
willing to take him by the collar and
throw him down stairs; the clerk, in
un abstracted manner, laid his hand
upon a heavy glass inkstand, and the
porter stood at the door with a large
sized broom in his hand.


'My FRIEND" continued the court
mildly, 8 it is now autumn, when the
cOttonwoods shed their leaves and
nothing is green but the evergreen.
But You make ea-ahem-a condemned
mistake when you take me for all
evergreen. In all the experience Of
this court it has never happened that
an attorney was fool enough to re-
quest the court to legislate itself out
Of office, and out of the perquisites
and emoluments pertaining to the
same This court was at first dispos-
ed to deal leniently with this de-
PRAYED heather; but in order to vim
dicate his authority it imposes a
sentence upon your client Of four
years in the State prison. AS for your
authorities you may go to-ahem-
to the Supreme Court or anywhere
else with them. This court stands
upon its dignity, sir, and if it did not
respect your poverty it would impose
y fine Of 81 so upon you for contempt !;
but the court is magnanimous, sir.
Yon may take your hand of his col
lar, Mr.. Sheriff. The court now ad-
iourns for refreshments"


The lawyer was seen half an hour
later loading up an express wagon
with his authorities. @


If things go on in this way it will
become imperatively necessary for
every member of Congress to have
his own newspaper. Here is the Times
correspondent telegraphing from New
Orleans in regard to the views of the