Year: 1871




FIEND.


His name was Benjamin ?
Gum, and he Was he agent for an
insurance company. He came
round to my Office fourteen times
in one morning 10 SEQ if he could
persuade ME to take out a lie in
surance policy in his company.
lie used to waylay me on the
street, atcl.urch, in my own house,
and bore me about that policy. IT
| went to the opera, Gum would
buy the seat next to me, and sit
there the whole evening, taking
about sudden death and the ad-
vantages of the ten-year plan. If
I got into a street car, Gum would
come rushing in at the next
corner, and sit by my side, and
drag ont u lot of mortality tables,
and begin to explain how l could
beat his company out OF q fortune.
If [ sat down to dinner at a res
taurant, up would come Gum, and,
seizing the chair next to me, he
would tell u cheerful anecdote
about man who insured in his
company for $4,000 only last
week, and was buried yesterday.
If attended the funeral Of q de-
parted friend, and wept as they
threw the earth upon bis coffin, l
could hear a whisper, and turn
ing round, there would be the in
domitable Benjamin P. Gum,
bursting to say: "Poor Smith |!
Knew him well. Insured for ten
thousand in .ur company. Widow
left in comfortable circumstances.
Let me take Your name. Shall
I?'


He followed me everywhere un-
til at last l got so sick of Gums
prosecutions that / left town sud-
denly one evening. and bid my
self in a secluded country village,
hoping to get rid Of him. Attic end
Of two weeks | returned, reach
ing home at one in the morning.
| had hardly got into bed before
there WAS L ringing at the door
bell. lock out, and there was
Gum with another person J! lie
asked if Max Adler was at
home. l said I was the man.
Mr.. Gum then observed that he
expected my return: and thought
be would call around about that
insurance policy. lie said he had
the doctor with him: and if |
would conc down. he would take
my name and have me examined
Immediately. l was too indignant
to reply. shut the window with
a slam, and went to bed again.
After breakfast in the morning I
opened the front door, and there
was Gum sitting on the steps
with the doctor waiting for me!
lie had been there all night. AS
1 came out they seized me and
tried TO undress me there on the
pavement, in order to examine
me. | retreated, and locked my
self up in the garrct, with orders
TO admit nobody to the house un-
til | came down stairs.


But Gum wouldn't he baficd.
He actually rented the house next
door, and stationed himself in the
garnet adjoining mine. When he
got fixed he spent his time pound
ing on the partition, and crying :
"Hal!o! Adelcr ;-Adcler, l say
how about that policy? Want
to take her out now ?" And then
he would tell me some anecdotes
about men who were cut off i'm.
mcdiatcly after paying the first
premium. But l paid no atten-
tion to him, and made no noise.
Then he was silent for awhile.


Suddenly, one morning, the trap.
door OF my garrct was wrcnched
off; and upon my looking up, | saw
Gum, with the doctor and Il crow,
bar, AMI lot Of death-ra.es, com
ing down the ladder at me. l fled
from the house to the Presby.
terian church close by, ana paid
the sexton twenty dollars to lei
me climb up to the point of tho
stccple apd sit astr;de ofthe ball,
promised him twenty more if he
would exclude every body from
| that steeple for a week.


Once safely on the ball, three
hundred feet from the earth,
made myself comfortable with tho