Year: 1876

A0 SinuueeS euQb-


|
Items OF Interest.
"Much remains unsung," as the tom
cat remarked to the brickbat when it
abruptly cut short his serenade.
According to well known physician,
"it is dangerous to go into the water
after q hearty meal" And it would be
O very fshy one q man would get If he
did go in after one.


The proprietor of forge, not remark
| able for his correc ctness of language, but
| who by honest industry had realized
| comfortable independence, being called
on at social meeting for toast, gave
"Success to forgery I"


a man in Buffalo pulled off his coat
and jumped in the canal to save woman
from drowning, when q pickpocket stole
his pocketbook from the coat, and the
woman swore at him for pulling her hair
in his efforts to save her life.
When we come to think of it, there is
but very little difference between a
postage stamp and a boy hanging on be-
hind q cab. The first you have to lick
to make it stay on, while the latter you
have to lick to make him stay off.


A lecturer was dilating upon tho
powers of the magnet, defying any one
to show or name anything SURPRISING
its powers. A hearer demurred, and
instanced lady, who, when young,
used to attract him thirteen miles every
Sunday.


A fat French lady despairingly says
~ am so fat that pray for disap-
pointment to make me thin. No sooner
does the disappointment come than the
mere expectation of growing thinner
gives me such Joy tnat become fatter
than ever"


There is nothing that tends to destroy
popular sympathy for the working class
es 30 much as the habit bricklayer has
of dropping bits of mortar from the top
of five story wall into the eye of the
wondering man who stands under the
lofty scafolding and looks up.
A little boy, six years old, and q little
girl, eight, were looking at the clouds
one beautiful summer evening, watch
ing their fantastic shapes, when the boy
exclaimed "Oh. Minnie, I see q dog
in the skyi" "Well, Willie" replied
the sister, I" it must be sky terrier"


"Coachman," said an outside passen-
ger to one who was driving at q furious
rate over one of the most mountainous
roads in the north of Scotland, "have
you no consideration for our lives and
imbs2" "What are your lives and
limbs to me2" was the reply. "I'm
behind time |"


A burlington schoolboy views the
advent of school days without tremor,
because, he says, he is panied to an
OF. that his father lbs. him without or.
nearly every day, worse than ever his
teacher did, nor is he the only unhappy
boy in town he says he knows q cwt.
the return of school days with eager
impatience. aia


A Westscn coroner, having occasion
to investigate the cause of q mans death
lately, charged the jury that they were
to ascertain whether the man came to
his death by accident, by incident, OF by
the incendiary." The jury returned that
" he came to his death by incidence, the
bowie knife having incidentally ton, he'd
a vital part" ''


Lightning played a curious freak in
Stow. Mass, lately. Entering by the
ceiling room twelve feet square, where
six young women were seated about the
wall, it dropped on the center of the
floor in ball, and exploded with loud
report and volumes of sulphurous
smoke, but injured nobody, not even
burning the carpet.


"Speaking of bathing" said Mrs.
Pariington, from behind the steam that
arose from her tea as veil to her blush
es when touching upon 80 delicate q
subject, "some can bathe with perfect
impurity in water as cold as Greenland
icy mountains and India's coral strands,
but for my part I prefer to have the
water little torpid"


Curiosities never seen: A fence
made from railing of scolding wife.
A. plate of butter from the cream Of a
joke. The small coins in "the change
of the MOON" The original brush used
in painting the signs of the times. The
hammer that broke up the meeting. The
animal that drew an inference. Eggs
from a nest of thieves. A bucket Of
water from Calls we'll"


A correspondent writes T attended
a wedding few days since. Wishing to
say something befitting the occasion, 1
approached the fair young bride in the
course of the day, and, after congratu-
lating her on her departure from the
state of single blessedness, wished her
q pleasant voyage down the river Of life.
She said she hoped so, but they were
going by railway to New York.


A carpenter who was always prognoe-
ticating evil to himself was one day
upon the roof Of Ave story building
upon which rain had fallen. The roof
being slippery he lost his footing, and
as he was descending toward the caves
he exclaimed: "Just as I told you 2"
Catching, however, an iron spout, he