Year: 1873




A NEWARK man recently paid claim
of $500, all in old-tashioned coppers They
weighed four hundred pounds and it took
three men to remove them.


An inquirer after scientific;information in
Concord, n. H., recently asked an apothe-
cary, What is this new disease-this
Cerro-Gordo final -Macginnis the papers
say so much abOut?"


a LOCAL paper warns its fair readers
that the sidewalks of Omaha abound in
"holes the size of a lady's foot"-and in
another column recounts that boy six
years old fell into one of them the other
day.


A RHODE ISLAND editor, wanting two
lines to complete column, observes that
"a sensible woman is the most sensible
being on earth" Which, cynic says, is
as if one should write, Hot ics-cream is
the hottest thing in the world"


a MASSACHUSETTS medical man has re-
Gently been examining into the compost
tion of the daily food of the average
Massachusetts person. He estimates that
every resident of the Bay State, who is
above the age of five years, is in the
habit of consuming pie at least twice each
day. A more appalling picture of reck-
less and widespread intemperance has
never before been resented-Neto York
Times.


A LA MODE OCTosYLLABIC.-


Since the Modocs concealed in their lava defy


Our troops metalurgic conchology,


Let Science" said Jones' with wink in his eye,


Extract them by Modocimology."


That is clever" said Brown; and would not


To care wha, mode doctors barbarians;
But fear, ere they're extracated or caught


They'll all be Modoctogenarians."


-ORtHEUs c. KERR, in the Graphic.


A BRILLIANT instance of joking under
difficulties lately occurred at Red Bluff,
Cal The Joker was NJ J. DonOhue,
whose span of life had been limited by
due process of law He came to the
scaffold in buoyant spirits, and seemed to be
delighted with the prospect of getting out
OF the world so soon. His remarkable
gayety completely unnerved the Sheriff
to see him off When the Sheriff put the
moose over Donohue's head, he turned to
the officer with bland smile, and said
Il say, Sleeth, can't you put that under
my arms? | was always ticklish round
the neck" These were the humorist's
last words.





doctor who was in the habit of giving his
patients medicine which would throw
them into fits and then doctoring them for
fits, which he considered his specially
This case has been parallcled by that of
an old man calling himself Dr. Teasdills,
who was found dead in his Office in
Buffalo few days ago. An examination
of his correspondence and accounts led to
the belief that the principal part of his
income was gained by persuading credul-
Gus patients that they were suffering from
the presence of a frog in each of their
stOmachs, and then going to work vi gor-
ously to eXterminate the frog!


SURGICAL OPERATION ON A HEN-A
gentleman living in Lexington, Mass,
bought some hens of a neighbor After
getting them home he noticed that one of
them had an immense crop, which hung
down nearly to the ground, and seemed to
cause her much trouble, if not consider
able pain. Being of a kindly nature, and
always desirous of alleviating the suffer
ings of the afflicted, besides being some
what OF an amateur surgeon, it occurred
to the gentleman that he might perhaps
relieve the hen of her unnatural burden.
He accordingly procured a sharp instru-
ment, and making an incision through
her neck into the crop, took out a large
dish-cloth, which in some greedy moment
poor biddy had swallowed He then, after
applying water and lard to the wound
sewed it up, and the hen now is apparent
ly as well as ever


DID you ever see man fish around in
tie bottom of tub of water for piece
of soap? At the first he simply reaches
right down upon it to pick it right up, and
is very much surprised to find that he
hasn't got it. Then he approaches it more
cautiously, puts his hand over it, and then
comes down noiselessly until he gets every
finger upon it, and then squeezes it tight
and-misses it. He looks at it for ml-
ment before making another effort, and
fills up the interval with few remarks
The third attempt is sort of semi-circle,
described with great deal of sagacty,
but it is a failure. Other remarks follow.
Then he makes a succession of dives, and
slOps the water over his clothes, and
drenches the carpet, and catches hold of
the soap several times, and lets 90 of it
again, and screams at the top of his voice,
and finally, in perfect despair, sits down
on the floor and actually howls-Danbury
Nens


REMARKABLE George
COlc, vi ID DllugtpOIt, SOn0., III tAD niilB
the remains of his grandmother, Mrs. Abb
gail Poole, who was buried in the old
burVing ground on Pard avenue, nineteen
years ago, discovered that the body had
been petrifed. The flesh upon a portion
of the face and small spot upon the
breast and a portion of the arms had de-
cayed ere petrifaction commenced, but
the remainder of the body looked as fresh
as upon the day of burial The solid flesh
rang like metal when lightly struck 1t
had become slightly discolored by the
earth, but upon scraping the limbs little,
the pure white was revealed, hard and
clear as polished ivory. A singular thing
in connection with this remarkable dis
covery is that the cords Of the neck were
loose and pliable, and, in raising the body
from the grave, the head hung over back
ward The box and coffin had gone en-
tirely to decay, and the grave was partly
filled with water, which had to be bailed
out ere the body was reached Mrs Poole
was almost ninety at the time of her death.


4 REvENGEFUL traveller on a certain
Western railroad packed a carpetbag full
of loaded revolvers, and handed it to a
gentlemanly baggage-smasher, who had
ruined three or four trunks for him
already. The smasher flung the bag up
against the wall savagely, and then threw
it on the floor and stamped on it, and
jumped up and down on it, as usual At
about the fourth jump firing began along
the whole line. Forty-six revolvers went
off in rapid succession, distributing bullets