Year: 1875

plump into big custard piel


l thought John would die laugh
ing, for he said ! had smashed that
custard and the plate all to thun-
der. You see we had to be awful
quiet, so the old man woald not
hear.


l was now ready to get into
bed, so l put the light out and
picked up my boots, thinking to
put them in a more convenient
place, when down went one Of my
legs through a piPe-hOlO, which
had been covered by paper, up tc
my hip.


Now, one part of me was up.
stairs,whil the longest part of me
was in the kitchen.


As my leg was very long it
reached a shelf which was occu-
pied by dishes, pans, coffee-pots,
ETC., and it turned over with a tre-
mendous crash.


The girls had not yet retired,
and l could hear them laugh fit to





split their sides. 1 felt awful
ashamed and scared, and my heart
was in my throat, for 1 expected
the old man every minute.


1 extracted my leg from the
confoundsd hole just in time, fol
the old lady looked into the
kitchen from her bedroom dool
and asked what all the noise wa:
about.


The girls put her off as best
they could, and 1 went to bed,
while John was strangling himself
under the cover to keep from
laughing aloud.


We soon went off into the land
Of dreams, with the hope of wax.
ing early. 1 wish l could tel
you my dreams, but it would -talee
me 49, lS..s--ono moment ]
would fancy myself by the side Of
Sallie, slipping nectar from her
heaven-bedewedlip lips; nextI tIwould
see the old man Aourishing his
cane above my head.


This all came to an end by
John giving me a kick.


On waking up and looking
round 1 saw Johns eyes as big as
my fist, while the sun was beam
ing in at the window.


What to do we couldn't tell, for
we heard the old man having fam
lily prayers in the kitchen.


John looked out of the window,
and said we could get down over
the porch roof.


Get out and dress as soon as
possible, he said.


So in my hurry my foot got
fastened in the bed-clothes, and
out l tumbled, head foremost,
turned over, ana rolled down
stairs until / struck the door,
which was fastened by wooden
button, and it giving away, out |
rolled in front of the old man.


He threw up his hands and cried
Lord, save us! for he thought /
was the evil one.


The old lady screamed until
you could have heard her a mile.


was so scared and bewildered
that l couldn'tget up at once. 1t
was warm weather, and 1 didn't
have anything on but a shirt.


When l heard the girls snicker-
ing it made me mad, and I started
for the barn. When half way
through the yard the dog sent up
a howl and went for me. When |
got into the barnyard 1 had to run
through a flock of sheep, where
was an old ram, who backed up a
little and then started for me.
With one bound / escaped his
blow, sprang into the barn, and
began to climb the logs in the
snow, when an old mother hen
pouneed upon my legs, picking
them till they bled.


l threw myself upon the hay,
and after John had slid down the
porch into hogshead of rain wa
ter, he came to me with one Of my
boots, my coat, and one of the
legs of my pants.


He found me completely pros
trate. Part of my shirt, my hat,
one leg of my pants, my vest,
stockings, necktie, and one boot
were left behind. l Rever went
again to see Sallie.