smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1875

The advantage that a married
man has over a bachelor is illus
trated by this little story which
the Newport Or, IL Nescs tells
"A married lady went to the Opera
House last Thursday evening as
soon as the doors were opened,
and took with her an old hat OF
her husbands. Selecting two of
the best seats 4, in the house, she
pat herself in one of them and the
hat in the other, and waited for
her husband. Of course every
body thought that the seat mad
been regularly taken and vacated
tor moment, so they let it and
the hat alone. About s o'clock
the fortunate husband of the pa
tient and enterprising wife came
in and took the seat that had been
kept for him.
Year: 1875

A COMPLIMENTARY NOTICE. =
The Susanville AdU0c0te gives a
singing cuss," who visited that
place, the following first rate puff:
"There came a man from the
Sierra Valley country to this
place few days since, who sent
a special messenger out through
this town, inviting all those VINO
had music about their souls to
meet him at the Court House.
and he would give them such a
treat as it was never the fortune
of this people to hear before. His
invitation extended only to those
who were best trained in music.
the unframed ear would be out of
face there, for the bobolink, the
canary the thrush were all
insignificant warblers compared
with him who voluntarily and
gratuitously offered his distin-
guished services on this occasion.
So the vocaLists of Susanville turn.
ed on en- noaSSe. and were for sew
eral hours entertained by a man
with the "big head" who is hard,
ly capably of teaching the scale to
school children W hn nnuldn't fell
the key IL which the common
pieces were written, and whose
voice was ike the bray Of a muz.
zied iackass.
Year: 1875

Do SOMETHING The man who
does nothing doesn't amount to
much. 1t makes little difference
whether he be a millionaire or a
paHper. He is only stagnant
pool, without energy enough to
start a ripple. He diffuseS NOR
al miasma over everything around
him Do something, don't stand
on the corner gaping, with your
hands in your pockets like an
idiot. The world was made to
work in, and if you fill your heart
with good angels the bad spirits
will keep out, because there is no
room for them.
Year: 1875

We yesterday net Capt Bob.
VINO was iii a fearful state of ex-
cItement. Great rings of white
were visible around his coal black
eyes, and his pOmatum-stiffened
scalp lock was agitated as is the
aspen in the breeze. He said
there had been a terrible fight
between two young Piute braves
at the camp in the eastern suburbs
of the city. According to Capt.
Bob, as we understood his story,
the two braves got down on all
fours on two little hillOckS about
20 yards apart, and then ran at
each other, meeting and butting
heads, IN the hollow between the
two ridges. At the third round
they telescOped, and in order to
seperate them it was found neces-
sary to cut off the heads Of both
men. We may not have caught
the exact meaning of all Bob said
about the fight, but in substance
it was about as related above
Virginia New Enterprise.
Year: 1875

Ton Sanders of Buffalo owns a little,
lazy, slow mare, that is the ridicule of
his friends. One recent evening he
and some of these friends were talking
of horses, when he astonished them by
offering TO bet hundred dollars that
he could ride his mare twenty miles in
an hour. He counted out his money
in tantalizing way, remarking that
his mare had been laughed at long
enough and he had made up his mind
TO show what she could do. 1t seemed
like robbing Tom, so they all said, to
take his bet, but he insisted, and the
stakes were put ntotrustworthy hands.
A day was chosen for the trial, and
when it came Tom led them to the
Central Railroad depot, where the
homely little mare was found aboard
baggage car Tom had ticketed her
to Rochester by express, and when the
train was ready to start he got on her
back smiling triumphantly He said
he reckoned that he could ride that
way twenty miles in an hour, unless
the time table lied Away went the
train, with the referee holding his


watch, and the three fellows who had
joinod in tho bot against the mare very
sorrowful of expression. About fiftOcn
miles had been run in about half an
hour, and Tom was grinning in antic-
ipation of easy victory, when the car
bumped over something, and he was
thrown off the mare by hastily applied
air brakes. An axle had broken, and
the train was stopped for more than an
hour. And Tom was not so ruefhl
over the loss of the stakes and the fail
ure of his trick, as he was over his
stupidity in not thinking Of taking the
mare off the car and riding the rest of
the twenty miles, as there had been
ample time to do within the hour.
Year: 1875

A MATTER OF IMPoRTANoE.--A cor
respondent of the New York Sun calls
the attention of all customers Of kero-
sene oil TO the pernicious and unhealthy
practice of using lamps filled with that
article with the wicks turned down.
The gas which should be consumed by
the flame, is by this means left heav-
lily in the air, while the cost Of the oil
thus saved at present prices would
scarce be one dollar year for the
lamps of a household, His attention
was called particularly to this custom
by boarding in the country where ker-
osene was the only available light. A
large family Of children were taken i'll
one night, and on going to the nursery
the mother found the room nearly suf-
located with a lamp nearly out, where
by the physician forbade the use of
lamp at night unless burned at full
head. He says he could quote many
cases one Of a young girl subject to
fits of faintness, which if not induced
were greatly increased by sleeping
in the room with the lamp almost
turned out. Besides the damage to
health, il spoils the paper and curtains,
sole the mirrors and windows, and
gives the whole house an untidy and
odor
Year: 1875

The French words constantly used
In English are often used wrongly. II
would be interesting to know the origin
of calling out encore when We wish TO
hear piece of music over again. 1t is
Just possible that In some bygone age
the French may have done this, but
certainly no living being ever heard a


Frerchman call out anything but "bis'
on these occasions. Then we have
adopted the French word morale /; but
il is never used by Englishmen, never
even by the most learned historians,
without blunder The learned his
torians say, for example, wellington
was now determined to carry ON the
war a dFoutrd,ice, and the morale of his
army was excellent Both these ex-
pressions are blunders dF0nrdnce is
bad French; ought to be outrdHce but
morale, used in this sense, is still worse
1t is hardly possible TO imagine more
absurd mistake, and yetit is universally
prevalent among English writers. The
historians mean to say ''the moral Of
of the army was excellent, or, in plain
English that the men were IN q cheer
fully resolute temper, whereas TO say
that the morale of the army isgood is TO
affirm that its theories Of morality are
sound, or in plain words that the sol
diers are convinced that they ought
not TO commit adultery, etc iemordle'
used in this way means mental firIn-
ness, cheerialness, courage to face am
culties and bear privations without be.
ing cast down into low spirits; Ia mordt
Of body OF men means their theory
more or less severe, Of moral duty ana
obligation. Thus lofty morale may
exist at the same time and IN the same
person with q low moral You may DC
utterly discouraged as TO temporal al
Year: 1875

The NEcK.---Perfect health demands
that the clothing about the neck should


bevery moderate inquantity, and worn
40 loose as to prevent tho slightest com
preston. The great error frequently


committed In clothing this part of the
body consists in wearing such an
amount as to overhead and weaken the
throat, and thus render Il susceptible
to cold or in wearing il so tight as to
retard the circulation Of tho blood to
and from the head. Great care should
be exercised upon this point, as the
arteries and veins leading from the
hcart othc brain arc so sitnated in the
neck that slight compression there
serves 10 check the flow Of the blood.
Many cases Of congestion Of the brain
and headache are partially or wholly
caused by too tight collars and cravats.
Year: 1875

On the day Of the election they drag
ged him from poll 70 poll, stopping NJ
all the saloons on the way. He had
to make 256,0 promises, pull his wal
let until IL was as fat as n wafer, drink
lager with some and cold wnter with
Others. and when night came, he went
homo and tried 10 hug tho hired girl,
called Mrs. Cain his dear rhinoceros,
and fell over the cradle and went TO
slccp with his head under the stove.
Year: 1875

John Cain was duly nominated and
the band came out and searnaded him.
With the band came several hundred
electors, who filed the Cain mansion to
overfowing, spit tobacco all over the
house, ate and drank all they could
find, broke down the gate, and went
off with three cheers for John Cain.
Year: 1875

property in this city for ta1ation vas $780,
000, 600, and the rata Of taxation IS mills
On tho dollar. 1t will require that same rate
Of taxation and the same aggregate valuation
to produce the revenue estimated for by the
Comptroller. But to produce the revenue
needed to meet the appropriations asked for
by the Boards will require that the rate Of
tax be increased to ~ mills on the dollar. It
is useless to add to the assessment and then
point to reduction OF the rate Of tax Tint
fraud Will deceive no one. The productive,
and therefore real, value OF the property
has not Increased since last year, and it will
be q moakery and delusion to attempt to
hido and cover up an advance in the rate Of
taxation BY an arbitrary increase Of the as IS
sessnaent- :~. F;~ -.


The gentlemen who compose the Commit
tee on Finance in the Common Council GER
tainly know the condition Of the. people Of
Chicago. and their inability to pay increased
taxes. The citizens look to that Committee
to report such a list Of appropriations as will
require no increase Of tax over last year; and
they look to tho whole Board to preserve
the financial credit Of the city by 3 firm ad-
hcrence to close economy and to such rate Of
taxation as may be necessary to meet the
eity'a debts and necessary expenses.
Year: 1875

cal, OF pecuniary reasons, WIS aiding and
abetting the criminals, he would Of course
discharge him Instantly. Yet this imaginary
emp1oye would be no more faithless to his
duty; and would deserve no more fully an in
stant discharge, than ths Superintendent Of
Police, who refuses to perform bis official
duty. Time was when the business Of Su-
perintendent OF Police in q great city was to
arrest rogues, break up dens Of 1ascality, and
drive the criminal classes out Of the CITY,
via the State Penitenhary if he could. We
have changed all this in Chicago. Our Police
superintendents duty does not now seein to
include such, business. a consequence is
that the dangerous class enjoy an un1isturbed
license to prosecute their criminal trade.
Year: 1875

A day or two ago, when a young
colored man living in this city,
took a peppermint lOzenge in his
teeth, leaned over the gate and
mOtioned to his girl to bite off the
other half, she gave her head a
proud toss, and replied "No,
san If you want to marry me,
jist sWaller dat candy and spoke
up like d white mani" VckS6rg
Herald.
Year: 1875

The men of Jefersonville, In.
diana must be a very incredulous
lot. When one of them found q
sixteen-inch paper collar in his
wife's bedroom the other night,
and demanded an explanation on
the ground that he himself wears
only fOurteen-and-a-half, the lady
told him that the times were SO
hard that she had begun to take
in washing. But the explanation
didn't satisfy him. Some men
are nereg satisfied.
Year: 1875

THE BERRETrA, an article to which
allusion has frequently been made. in
connection with the investment OF His
Eminence, Cardinal McCloskey, is the
usual square cap worn when in church
by all Catholic priests who are not offi-
ciating at the altar; only in the case Of
a cardinal, its color is scarlet, instead
Of black
Year: 1875

CoMMENDABLE. Governor Cochran
has, during the late session Of the Leg
islature, set an example which we trust
his SUCCESSORS in Office will always fol-
low-he did not interfere with legisla-
tion in any particular. Such policy
has given the people Of the State new
grounds for just pride in their sxecu'
tive. The position assumed by the
Governor at the late session places him
above the partisan, and is harbingel
Of a popular and just Naturalization
SUSSEX Journal.
Year: 1875

Just what the Republican majority
will be can only be told as issues are
made up hereafter. The caucus to.
morrow will develop how many of the
so,caned Independents are disposed to
iall into the old lines. All that the
caucus will do will be to appoint a
committee to revise the list Of stand
ing committees, and it is doubtful if
they can be ready by Monday to re-
port them to the Senate This will
not prevent them taking up Pinch
Year: 1875

Ice Up THE DELAwARE.-The ice in
tue Delaware at Trenton, and above
ami below for some distance, yesterday
was heavy, and filled the river from
bank to bank A sudden thaw, in all
probability, would endanger property
along the river. For some distance
above Easton, and down to within a
short distance of Trenton, the river is
free from ice, but, the banks on each
side, in many places, are piled up from
five to ten feet with huge cakes of hard
ice, from eight TO sixteen inches in
thickness, left there by the falling of
the water after the freshet over week
ago.
Year: 1875

The end of the Force bill is, of course.
the end of Mr.. Grant and it is cheering
to see that Mr.. Grant, t,per the Washing
ton Republicans SO accepted it, and goes
on in really Il frantic way. as il his
stolid wrath had been filtered through
the widest of wild Irish writers. This
article, quoted in our Washington de-
spatches, looks as if he had thrown up
his hand, but we need not expect to see
the last of his struggles yet awhile. He
will undoubtedly do some very foolish
and very misohievous things; but he is
liable henceforth to be called yery
sharply to order for them. In this point
of view the interval that will elapse
before the meeting of the next Con
gress is good thing, because in the
meantime Senators and Representatives
will have time to learn. by better in
dexes than the newspapers, since they
profess to believe that there arc better.
how deep and wide is the opposition
to Grantism and all that belongs to it.
There is no doubt that Mr.. Grant has
already committed offences twenty
times more amenable to the discipline
the Constitution provides for them
than any on which the House attemp-
ted the impeachment of poor Mr.. John
son, and if he goes on, Senatoss may
find at the beginning of next session
that they will consult their own politi-
cal safety best by throwing him over
as Jonah. World.
Year: 1875

DANGER TO THE WHEAT CRop.-A we'll
posted farmer informed us this morning
that he apprehended some damage to the
wheat crop from the sleet and ice with
which it has recently been covered. Less
snow than usual has fallen during the
wint:r. while much sleet and ice has ex-
isted, which will not be apt to benefit
the wheat to any extent
Year: 1875

BUSINESS REvIvING.-Every indication
tends to general revival OF business at
the opening OF the spring. Crowds of
mechanics and laboring men are daily
seen going to and from their different
employments in numbers NOT far short
Of the tetter times. Other signs pre-
dict the same termination.
Year: 1875

so when they suddenly take cold
and feel all the organs of the nose
and head stopped up. they can
promptly take a remedy to at once
loosen the mucous, which If al
lowed to stay becomes
Year: 1875

Even Pennsylvania hangman may show
what is conventionally known as "taste," in
his profession He smooths the pathway Of
the condemned wretch to. the grave by decor
ating the moose with blue silk ribbon.
Year: 1875

The good people of the town Of
E-were talking of moving their
meeting house to a more agreeable
locality. Among the advocates of the
movement none were more earnest
than old Deacon A, who. by the
way, had an uncomfortable habit Of
sleeping in church. No matter how
interesting the discourse, the old
deacon was sure to "drop off, at about
such time. On the Sabbath preced-
ing the day appointed for moving the
house, the pastor preached an interest
ing sermon on The Rock of Ages" F."
Growing eloquent in his remarks, the
good minister finally asked with great
emphasis:


"Who can move it ?"


The deacon having been asleep as
usual, woke up just in time to catch
the query, and thinking the pastor
referred to the meeting house, rose uT
10 bis seat and exclaimed:


an bring over my yoke of steers
They'll jerk it along the whole dis
tance if you'll keep plenty of hare
wood rollers under it,"


The deacon never slept in meeting
after that
Year: 1875

Correspondence of the New Orleans
Bulletin:


The Conservatives have gained a
great victory by moderation and for
bearance. They have also achieved
an honorable renOwn for truthfulness
and for fidelity to the laws Of their
country. Such victories are not often
won by bold and impulsive people,
and will long live to grace the es-
cutcheon of Southern chivalry. The
Northern people have weighed the
negro rule in the balances and have
found it wanting. Its death-knell has
been sounded on this Continent.
They have proven themselves to be
unworthy of the high trust committed
to them; and no longer will they be
allowed to WELD the balance of power.
Gen. Jackson. whose uame and fame
are forever linked with the interests Of
the Crescent City, no doubt looked
down with exultant pride and CRATE
full admiration upon the noble heroes
whose moral courage and unfinching
integrity swayed the destinies of this
mighty nation


A nobler victory has never been
achieved upon American soil than this
bloodless battle-a battle of right
against might. Never can a people,
who stand within the impregnable
bulwark, be conquered. No foe can
stand the concentration of these moral
influences. The weaker element is
bound to sink beneath the more pow
erful. True patriotism draws to itself
the elements and support Of the higher
life, and thus makes it indomitable.


New Orleans is destined yet to be
the theater of some grand displays OF
heroic virtues. The contest is not
ended. Radical rule, although on the
waue, is not yet broken; but, feeling
its moorings giving away, it will
make one desperate struggle to regain
its hold; and, iu doing so, it will sink
beneath the debris of the accumulated
corruptions and usurpations to depths
whose profound stiffness will never be
broken by the wings of time in its
fight over the abyss Of its disgrace
and utter degradation.


Brave men of the South! look well
to your laurels, and be firm be united.
Let no stain mar the banner which
you have unfurled, and which you
will triumphantly bear aloft over the
graves Of the depots to the honor oi
the true and free. NJ.
Year: 1875

A Michigan romance this time.
He was middle-aged gentleman and
was travelling on a railroad in the in
terror of the Peninsular State. He
was portly and well-fed IN appear
ance, and the fob which swung from
bis vest swung clear at the ends, so
round and protuberant was that por-
ton of his body which would have
been described by Shakespeare as
with fat capon lined" He didn't
look sentimental or at all the kind Of
a man to be easily affected by lovely
woman. He looked, in fact, as though
a square meal of the particular dish
he liked most would tempt him more
than Venus without her girdle on.


Some of the Michigan railroads are
new affairs, and the one On which this
sleek, middlc-aged man was riding
was one of the latest. The train
broke down, and for two or three
! hours the passengers were left to their
own resources for amusement. Time
hung heavily with our middle-aged
man, and be strolled off to the near.
est farmhouse, thinking that better
place to wait IN than the smoking-car.
The hours dragged themselves away,
the train was repaired, and the loco
motive screeched out warning to the
loiterers outside to resume their seats
in the cars. hut the portly, middle.
aged man didn't appear He saw the
train start, evidently, for be stood
with a woman on the steps of the
farmhouse, but be didn't appear at all
interested, and be was left behind.


The secret of the old gentleman's
apathy on the subject o: rapid trans.
portation finally came out in the local
paper published in the village close
by tn. scene of the railroad accident.
In the farmhouse where the portly
old gentleman stopped he me. a wo-
man whom be had not seen for years,
but who, when be last saw her, was
queen of hearts with him. 1t was
the old story of misunderstanding,
mutual obstinacy and a broken en-
gagenent. The old fame was rekin-
died in the heart above the portly
stomach when the middle-aged man
saw his long-lost-love, and, as she
was o widow, the encounter resulted
in a wedding. And wedding is
| hetter than funeral 81 LOujs Re.
publican.
Year: 1875

There is in the Department OF the
Interior at Washington at least one
heroine Of a mesalliance who has
made woman of herself, which she
never would have been had she stay
ed at home, and probably married
without a choice. Her father was a
wealthy New York merchant, and
took his daughter travelling with him
over Europe for couple OF years.
She was the only daughter OF the
family, aud ner father and mother and
brother watched her closely and cared
for Ler tenderly. In fact, they forgot
she was q human being, and alwa. 5
wanted to keep their angel in the
house.


None of the young men were good
enough for her, and she was not al
lowed to receive or 90 into company.
But she was allowed to drive out in
fine carriage, and on the box was a
good-lOoking young coachman. He
was the only young man she was
allowed to talk to, and he warmed
her heart. And both were human.
What wonderful resolution it must
have taken to induce her to marry
him. He was a conscientious boy,
too, but he could not resist such a
chance. 1t would not have been
human had he refused TO link his life
with that Of the girl And their lives
and fortunes were joined, and the
house ragged, but the young couple
kept out of the storm. They went to
living for themselves, and both put
their former lives all behind them.


She began teaching music and
writing for the periodicals. She did
her first work, and really just began
to live. He was busy, too-not driv-
ing a coach. They breasted the cross
currents oe the world together and
thrived. She is a government clerk
at a good salary and is well paid for
literary work, too. He is educating
himself up TO her high station of per-
feet independence. And both are
happy aud comfortable and live; they
do not simply. stay. Her father is
dead. Her mother and brother are
ENJOYING the luxuries of fortune in
New York. She would not 60 back
to that life again for double the
fortune. Life is worth more than
that. 1t may be called the mesalli-
ance, but it was not a mistake, for it
resulted i'm a bappv. active life.
Year: 1875

CoFFEE-STARCH-This is much
better than starch made in the ordi-
nary way for all dark clotbing-such
as black or dark brown calicoes, perca-
les and muslins, also for grass linens
and Hollands: Take two teaspoon
fuls Of the best starch, mixed with
enough cold water to make it paste.
Stir this into q pint of boiling hot
coffee, well settled. Let it boil ten
minutes. Stir it few minutes with
a spermaceti or wax candle. Strain
it through cloth, and starch the dark
colored or black clothes in it.
Year: 1875

MoNIA.-The Shreveport
Times says: "This disease is more
generally prevalent in town and coun-
try than we have ever known it.
Those who are not afflicted with colds
are the exception and not the rule, all
of which might have been anticipated
as the effects of the long spell of cold
and wet weather"


Pneumonis and colds prevail to a
considerable extent in Ricbland parish,
but we cannot say that either is more
prevalent than we ever knew it.
Year: 1875

IF you have been picking or hand
ling acid fruits, and have stained your
hands, wash them in clear water, wipe
them lightly, and, while they are yet
moist, strike. a match and shut your
hands around it SO as to catch the
smoke, and the stain will disappear.