Year: 1873

The Records Of the United State Patent
Office exhibit innumerable applications for
ludicrous as well as impracticable inven-
tions. The time and talent expended in
devising some machine, which il is sup
posed will make the inventors fortune
would, if applied to his ordinary daily
labor, make him thoroughly competent
mechanic and secure him comfortable
livelihood. As proof of the truth of the
above remarks, few illustrations may be
given. In 1870 the owner of some bee
hives, irritated by the loss of his honey by
the bee moth, asked for patent for a
combined henroost and beehive. He had
noticed that the bee moth travels at night
while the busy bee works by day. His
desire, therefore, was for a device that
should admit the worker by day and keep
out the thief by night. Thus his ingenu-
ity effected the erection of henroost piv-
oted upon beehive, provided with gates.
The bees were expected to be in their
hives just before dark the hens lighting
on their roosts, were then to close the
gates of the hive and keep them shut all
night. The early rising of the hens would
automatically open the gates again and re-
turn the bees-their honey all safe--to the
airs Of heaven and the flowers of earth.
He received the patent.


Another applicant asked for patent
right for an artificial moon that should
light each town that used it without ex-
pense. His eye had often been struck by
the reflection Of the distant windows at
sunset, and how far light travelled. He,
therefore, proposed balloon for each town
sufficiently large to raise huge reflector,
that was to be hoisted every evening at
dusk, about the time the hens had shut in
the bees, The reflection of the suns rays
cast downward upon the village was sure
to light it through all the darkness of the
night. Fortunately for himself this in
ventor presented his application through
a patent attorney, who told him it was
doubtful if it could be obtained.


In the fall of 1872 gentleman applied
for and received patent for building
houses on wheels and rollers, so that in
case of earthquake they might roll forward
or backward, and not be shaken to pieces.


Another gentleman applied for a patent
for heating canals by steam, so that boat
ing could go on in the winter as well as in
the summer. The office decided that this
invention was worthy of protection and
gave him his patent.


Another applied for combination of a
clock and bed, so ingeniously contrived
that when the clock struck the bottom of
the bed dropped out. He claimed that
this plan would probably awaken the
sleeper


Another inventor from the efrontiersasked
for patent for combination of a cannon
and a plough. For this purpose he filed
three applications, making the elongated
handles of the pillow hollow, so as to form
two cannon. These were to be kept loaded
till the guerillas were after the ploughman,
the cannon were then to be fired, the
guerillas shot down, and the farmer to 20
on his way rejoicing.


In 1870 a very ingenious gentleman
from the rural districts applied for pat
ent to prevent COWS from switching their
tails He presented two models-one
shaped like bottle, around the end of
which the cows tail was to be curlcd; the
other was a square block, with hole
through the centre, wherein the tail was to
be put and tied in knot, so that the ami
NAL could not withdraw it.