Year: 1873

A Danbury man started Tor Greenwich,
Friday, to see an iron fence. What he
wanted to see an iron fence for we don't
know, and it really makes no difference
He went He wanted to 90 off on the 80
train, so he hurried home to get ready.
His wife and vicious outside woman were
cleaning house, and it was some little time
before be could get his society suit ready.
In the meantime he opened fire on the
largest half Of a custard pie, holding it in
his hand, and dancing around and yelling
for his things. When she brought his
oyercoat, he set the pie in a chair TO put
on his coat, but in his nervousness stepped
on the end Of long.handled whitewash
brush which was balanced across pail, and
the other end few up and discharged about
a pint Of the awful mixture over the sofa
wallpaper, and his painting and indignant
wife She made a remark, and he contra
dicted it. Then he sat down in the chair
where the pie was, aud got up with howl
that would have melted the stoutest heart.
She wanted him TO wait while she scraped
off the surplus, but he was too mad to con.
verse in words of more than one syllable
and started for the depot, and boarded the
train, and in the seclusion of the baggage
car removed the offensive lunch


He got to Greenwich all right, and
looked at the fence We hope he admired
it, Then he started for home but missed
the train, and as the next was an express
and didn't stop at Greenwich, he was
obliged to walk to the draw-bridge at Cos
Cob, or stay in Greenwich all night So
he walked up there in the rain, but didn't
mind It much, as he had an umbrella aud
the pie was pretty well dried in When he
got to Cos Cob he stood up on fence to
look at the scenery, and swear, when
sharp gust of wind took off his hat aud car
ried it across bog lot. Then he stepped
down on the other side, too amazed to ox-
press himself, and another gust of wind
came along and turned the umbrella inside
out A brief conversation here eDsued be.
tween himself aud the umbrella, which he
still held, and he again started for the hat.
When he got it he kicked it around several
times and thea jammed it down on his
head, and started once more through the
bogs as the train drew up at the bridge. II
was terrible struggle as the bogs were
uncertain, but he strained and coughed and
spit and howled and swore, and il did seem
as if he would catch it after ALL What he
thought as he stood on that fence and
watched the train sail across the bridge, no
human being can tell.


An hour later he appeared in Stamford,
wet through to the skin, splashed with mud,
and with an expression on his face that
would have scared a hydrant. Backing
himself against the depot he stood there
until near midnight, and then went up on
the owl train to Norwalk, falling asleep in
the meantime, aud narrowly escaping being
carried by the depot Here he took the
freight for Daubury, arriving at home just
before daylight. His wife was ahead, but
not sleeping She lay there torn by fore.
bodings and harrassed by suspense. Per.
haps he was dead, aud lying on the cold
ground in the rain. Then she thought of
his iieIess body, and groaned; aud thought
of the pie, and groaned again. She knew
his knock the moment it sounded, and rush
ing downstairs in the costume appropriate
to that hour, she threw herself into his hair
ond hysterically shouted: "Oh, you old
rascal, come in here. - Danbury Nelos.