smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1872

A man advertised for wife, and requested
each candidate to enclose her carte de viSite.
A spirited young lady wrote to the advertiser
in the follow terms Sir, l do not enclese my
cdrte, for, though there is some authority for
putting a cart Before horse, | know of none
for putting one before an ass.
Year: 1872

When DR.. johnson asked the widow Porter
to be his wife, he told her candidly that he was
of mean extraction, that he had no money, and
that he had an uncle hanged. The widow re-
piled that she cared nothing for his parentage,
that she had nc money herself, and though she
had not had a relative hanged, she had fifty
who deserved hanging SO they made a
matrh Ot n
Year: 1872

Sing me the song again
The Wild sad notes that breathe of haunting pain,
The wild, notes that thrill my heart with bliss;
Quick throbbing now with passionate dsdain,
Now falling soft as evening breeze's kiss;


Sing me the song again!


Repeat the wOnderous tunel
The full broad glory of the perfect moon,
The pearly glimmer of the clustrIng lsaves
The ghOstly shadows of the nights high noon,
My listening soul perceiveS:


Repeat tho wOnderOus tune!


Sing me the song again
For through the sudden changes of the strain
Falling like dewdrops from the flashing keys
Pierces the anguish of a soul in pain,
Tha. knows not where is peace:


Sing me the song againl


Sing me the song for ever
So shall it's passion and it's pathOs
Leave tho rapt ear, but all the lingering night,
Though the low melody come signing ever,
Infinite longing, infinite delight;


Sing me the song for everl
Year: 1872

An old writer has quantity said: "God
looks not at the oratory of our prayers, how
eloquent they are nor at their geometry, how
long they are; nor at their arithmetic, how
many they are; nor at their logic, how methodi-
cal they are but He looks at their sincerity,
how spiritual they arc.
Year: 1872

81 must get married" said bachelor to
married friend, for l never can find button
on clean shirt"


Take care" said the Benedict with sigh,
cor you may chance upon a wife who will not
find you clean shirt to button"
Year: 1872

The selectmen have laid out contin- nation of the Bee Brook road southerly to the Gum Bridge. They are also to act on proposed alteration of the portion of the old turnpike leading from the village of New Preston northeasterly to the Bee
Year: 1872

January-He who is born in this
month will be laborious. and a lover of
good wine. but very subject to infdelity;
but he will be complaisant and withai
fine singer, The lady bornin this month
will be pretty. a prudent housewife,
rather melancholy, but very good tenn
pered.


February-The man born in this
month will love money much, but the
ladies more; be will be stingy at home
but prodigol abroad The lady will be
a humane and afectionate wife aud ten
der mother.


March-The nan born in this month
will be rather handsome, he will be
honest and prudent. but will die poor
The lady viii be passionate chatterbox.
somewhat given TO fighting, AID in old
0ge fond OF the bottle


April-The man who has the miSfor-
tune 10 be born IN this month will be
subject to nlaladics. He will marry
rich and handsome heiress. The lady
will be tall and stout, with little feet,
little wit, but a great talker, and withal
great lair


May-The man born in this month
will be handsome and amiable. He will
make his wife happy The lady will be
equally blest in every respect.


June-The man viii be OF small stat
ure, passionafely foud of woman and
children. but will not be loved in return
Tie lady will be a giddy parsonage, fond
Of coffee; she will marry at the age Of
twenty, and wili be a fool at forty five.


July-Tke man viii be fair; hc will
suffer death for the wicked woman he
loves. The female of this month will be
passabiy handsome, with i sharp uose
and suiky temper.


August--The man will be ambitiou,
aud courageous but TOO apt to cheat
He will have several maladies aud two
wives The lady wni be nn,iabie and
twice married, but the second husband
will cause her to regret Tie first.


eptember-He that i born in this
month, will be strong and prudent. bui
too easy with hi- wife The lady, round
faced. fair haired; discreet, afable, auc
loved by her friends.


October-The man will have hand
some face and fiorid complexion; he vii
be wicked in his youth, aud always IN
constant. lie viii promise one thin;
and do another: will remain poor Th
lady will be pretty, little given to con
tradiction, a little coqueiisb and some
thing too fond OF wine She will hav
three husbands who will die OF grie
and she viii best know why.


November-The man will have iish
hair, fair complexion, and be tall an
strong: of passionate but melanchoi
temperament. lie will be ambitious, yt
courageous, wise and of strict integrity
In fact, the greatest and best men ar
born in this month"; The lady OF thi
month will be large; liberal aud full {
novelty.


December-The man born in thi
month will be good sort of person
though passionate. lie will devote him
self to the army, and be dishonored b
his wife The lady of this month wi
be amiable and handsome, with a goo
voice and well proportioned body sh
will marry once. remain poor, but con
tiDne honest.


AZ
Year: 1872

Is without doubt the best Political and
Family Journal in the State. and the best
evidence of its character and appreciation
Of its readers Is found in the fact that but
few who subscribe for il ever cease taking
it. Each number contains thirty-six COL
umns Of choice reading matter.
Year: 1872

MADE HIM PAY-When General
Jackson was President, heartless clerk in
the Treasury Department ran up an indebt
edness with poor landlady to $50. and
then turned her of as he did other credi
tors. She finally went to the President
with her complaint, snd asked him il be
could not c. mpel the clerk to pay the bill


"He offers his note" she said, "but his
note is good for nothing"


Said the President, Get his note and
bring it to me-"


The clerk gave her the note, with the
jeering request, she would let him know
when she got the money on it."


Taking it to the President he wrote "An.
drew Jackson" on the back of it, and told
her she would get the money at the bank.


When it became due the clerk refused
to pay the note, but when be learned Who
Was the endorser, he made haste to ''raiee
the wind" The next morning he found q
no on his desk saying that his services
were no longer required BY the government
aud it served him right,
Year: 1872

How TO LOAD HAY Nearly oue-half
Of the labor can be saved by knowing how
to lead and unl.ad, and labor is money
Reach the fork over the bunch and place
it in the side away f. ON you then it comes
up easy Commence at any pant OF the
loa and place the forkfuls in regul.r order
against each other, and keep on around in
the same direction till the load is complet-
Q and to unload, commence where u
LETT off and reverse the operation. In this
way one man eau put of load quicker
than two when there is no regular order in
the arrangement.
Year: 1872

The Door man must walk to get meat for his
stomach, the rich man to get stomach to his
meat.


A wedding is to take place in Philadelphia
in December, the brides sdress-Parisian make
costing S0,0 600 gold y


Why is husbandman working in q pptoto
field the prOudest fellow in the world" Because
he Is always ION his dig"
The yield of the fifty furnaces now erecting
will add 500, zoo tons Of pig iron to the present
annual production of the United States
Year: 1872

The JERSEY MOsQUIro.-Sir Toby has been
spending few days in South Jersey. and
phil0sOphicaily observes Of one OF his expert
ences OF his visit Il never did have that ami.
mostly toward the mosquito that most people
feel, but when saw him in his glory down
here, deliberately leaning against my bed post
his legs crossed, and his right flipper resting
carelessly on his hip, watching for me to 60 tt
bed, it struck me that, for vampire, his be


havior was impertinent and exasperating II
| the ext treMe.''
Year: 1872

Beware of man or woman with q
fixed smile. Trust the most hideous
scowler before the being who goes
about with an angelic grin carefully
exhibited to all eyes under any and
every circumstance 1t is not nat


ural to smile perpetually. and no
one ever assumes a mask without be-
ing conscious of a necessity for con-
cealment. Do not misunderstood
me. There are young women. and a
few old men, who break out into a
smile whenever they speak. These
are not the people l mean. The
smile of which 1 warned you is a
motionless, hypocritical fixed ex-
preston, which have seen worn on
silent three hours ride by rail with
out the slightest alteration-thats sort
of smile which mos. misguided lady
artists present upon their canvas
when they delineate martyrs. saints
and angels. The portrait of lady
has O different smile-the fashion
plate simper, though sem;-idiotic, is
not dangerous. Persons of no pen
etration allude to the chronic smile
as $50 sweet" and any one capable
of holding the muscles of the face
under control, is generally able to
aaucal sweetly, to move quietly, and
to use choice language, measured
tones, in moments at the greatest ex-
citement, and SO can always place a
better man or woman at great disad-
vantage. and appear injured and in
nocent when actually most guilty.
Year: 1872

shape and confine the water in them till they are through with it, and not nearly SO many are needed to do as much, and more, work. A little exercise of the mind over this matter of wheel, and fine illustra. tion is given of the power of mind over matter, to say nothing of the advantage to the world of having created an immense improvement Tn the availability of wheels turned by water to do the work of the hands. We had occasion recently to speak of a new wheel invented by MT. Crowell, of Lime Rock. When one of his wheels are put to practical test, we should be glad to see the amount of power his mind has had over the matter of his wheel. Trot out your wheel MT. Crowell, and get it in working order. If it is good for anything, we'll tell people so, but if you have failed, (and we think there is not much danger of that,) well-well. in that case, we'll not say much of any thing about it. Would you?
Year: 1872

THE CAPTURED PIRATE AT NEwPoRT.-In

 the midst of the political excitement, the capture of the doughty Pirate of the Gulf" in the raging swell off Point Judith comes as refreshing diversion. The facility with which the rakish craft was overhauled and secured by our gallant marines does not speak we'll for the courage of the pri- vateersmen, and yet they are very natural ly exciting general interest among the fash ionables at Newport, ard that city is all agog over this unusual attraction. That it happened, too, just at the height of the season is blessed thing. The bellies and beaux can now vary the monotony of the seaside rides and walks by going to the docks and examining critically the low black hull of tue captive, with her sharp bow and jaunty topmasts from which the

 flag of the unrecognized Republic sauciy waves. On the gun decks moodily stalk the officers, muttering strange oaths froh beneath their curling moustachois. They grasp their gold mounted stillettos and brandish their diamond-hilted rapiers, as they sullenly eye the neighboring revenue cutter and catch the fresh breeze from the balmy shores of their much loved isle. Be- low, the crew drown their sorrow in cups of foaming wine, and carol forth wild Gu ban melodies in defiance. Long Branch and Saratoga must pale their intellectual fires. Only Newport can advertise bevy of Simon-pure privateersmen. Boston Post.
Year: 1872

1AenCe

 That article in your last issue, entitled, "Pen Picture of New England Village, strikes us Kent people with the same idea it did yourself, and the initials attached to it being those of young lady that did stop at the house opposite the largest store, and therefore with her own eyes saw, and being personally acquainted with, the hab- it's of the people she has so exactly pictured, it is not at all hard to guess that It is meant for Kent. We hope to hear from l.. G. again, and if she will continue her picture we hope she will keep the bright side out for Kent, as for long time it has needed some one to speak in it's praise. ..... The usual quiet of our village was somewhat stirred last week by lawsuit; being a complaint for disturbing the peace by using profane language while driving along the highway. The defense proved that it was another person. Chief Justice Beach pre- sided with rather more than usual dignity, and the promptness with which he rendered judgement, won for him new laurels. Truly it was one-sided case, and how our grand juror could sign the complaint on SO slim evidence. we cannot see. The wealth CT continues about s5e in the shade, but with the refreshing showers we have heard no complaints. XzYMENUs.
Year: 1872

Something of the grandeur of the ''hound. less prairie" something of it's fierce heat when the ''fire fiend" envelopes it, is to be discovered in the rhetoric of the Western editor as he goes for the enemy who has trif1ed with his forbearance and defied the lightnings of his wrath. ''The foul mouthed poll-parrott of the Paoli Sca0enger has too long roasted in the shadow of our good nature. Let him beware. Forbearance is no longer virtue. We shall send his dainty plumage skurrying on the four winds of heaven, and give his bloated carcass to the vultures."
Year: 1872

eg Fanny Fern says that when she sees a pretty man, with an, apple head, and raspberry moustache with six hairs in it, paint on his cheeks, and a little dot of a goatee on his chin, with pretty little blink ing studs in his shirt bosom, and a little neck-tie that looks as if it would faint if 1t were rumpled. she always feels desire to nip him with pair of sugar tongs, drog him gently into pot of cream and strew pink rose leaves over the little remains.
Year: 1872

No man of good sense in his right mind but
laughs at the idea. II General Grant is re-
elected things will go on very much as they
have gone on for the past four years and they
have gone on quite tolerably for most OF us.
Year: 1872

viii the Commercial explain WhyIr don't raise
the Grant flag. -DeiIrlrtdn.


T'e do raise it. We nave been favorable to
President Grants reelection, from the first and
We have never expressed contrary opinion Or
wish As for the mere printing of the ticket, al
the head of the paper, very few daily newsp'
peIs do that. in these days. We shall, however
publish the full list Of Republican nominations
soon as they are all made in each issue of the
paper, 80 that the people may see them.
Year: 1872

been mainly Christianized; q large number
have their settlements within the limits Of the
States, and, though their habits are good, they
are gradually decreasing in numbers. It also
includes number Of tribes that have, within
comparatively short time, abandoned the savage
life, and have settled down upon reservations,
and are beginning the somewhat difficult life Of
working at agriculture and other employments.
These latter tribes have not advanced far
enough to be able to take cure Of Themselves,
and the Intercourse with the whites has not been
productive Of much good to their habits, morals,
or industry.


The tribes which ore now considered savage
number about one-fourth Of the whole Indian
population. They are mainly composed of tribes
which we're transferred to our Jurisdiction by
the acquisition Of Texas and the Mexican States.
These bands prefer their wild state, and refuse
to understand why civilization is better than bar
barism. They have confidence in their ability to
maintain their contest with the white race, and
at an events prefer the risks Of externination to
submission. All efforts to tame them have
failed. It is possible that. after they shall have
been reduced in numbers by the unequal con-
test, the remainder Of them will accept the in
eVitable, will settle down upon reservations; but
it is more likely that they will be gradually ex-
terminated by wars among themselves and by
the bullet and Thiskey of the ever-adEancing
Anglo-Saxon.
Year: 1872

We have presented in general terms the sue
cessfn operation Of the cumulative voting
system in tho choice OF representatives in the
Legislature. For the first time the people ire
represented in one branch Of tile Legislature as
nearly in the proportion Of their division upon
political questions IS possible. But the returns
show that there ia another evil in our system Of
elections, and that is in the matter OF counting
the votes. The returns indicate that the 1nspec-
tors Of Election have miscountod, OF have dis
REGARDED. the division ct Totaa in maQ7 IL
Year: 1872

There are many incidents connected
with the late election in this county
which it is we'll to consider. The first
of which is the utter breaking up of
official rings, which were maintained
through caucus management and party
discipline; and the consequent breaking
down of party lines, the maintainance
of which had only resulted in defeating
or misrepresenting the popular viii and
public interests. No organized party
achieved any victory as party. While
Judge McFadden. the candidate of the
people, had nearly two hundred major
ity in the county, the county officers are
about equally divided between members
of the two old political parties.


Tie chief contest was upon the Office
of Sheriff, and the success Of Mr.. At
kins, the regular Republican nominee.
is one of the most notable triumphs of
the election. He was opposed by some of
the leading politicians of his own party,
by all the power and influence which
could be commanded by his defeated
competitor for the nomination. who had
severaltimes been nominated and elected
to that office by the Republican party,
and who, in violation Of all party usages.
bolted the nomination of Mr.. Atkins,
and used all the means which the pos
session of the Office give him to elect
the candidate nominated by the opposi-
Year: 1872




''THE WICKED FLEE WHEN NO MAN pUR
sUETH.-The day after the election a no.
ted "sport" and saloon-keeper exclaimed
" We have got to stop that PAPER or
hunt our holes!' This is undoubtedly
true of Il certain class who have hereto
fore practiced their lawless vocation in
public with impunity in this city, to the
great scandal of our town and the dis
grace of those officers charged with see
ing that the laws were inforced. TO
such we have only to say that paper"
cannot be stopped, intimidated or sub
sidized in the interest of squaw brothe!s
or other dens of infamy; and all such
may as well hunt their holes, for Z" to
that completion must it come at lust


We have never made war upon any
class, or upon any vocation which the
law sanctions, or public opinion toler-
ates. The man who complies with the
law regulating the sale of spirituous or
malt liquors, has vested right under
the law, which we have no inclination
to disturb. But the man who under the
color of a hquor license keeps squaw
brothel, or an open gambling hell, upon
our public streets, in open violation of
the law, is no more to be respected than
a thief, or any other offender against
the laws; and where such lawless prac-
tees are tolerated, the character and
business Of the town must suffer in pro-
portion, and in our vocation of a public
journalist we would be false to our trust
not to protest against such proceedings
In doing this we have given no ground of
offense TO any law-abiding citizen, wheth-
er engaged in selling liquor or any 9TH
er lawful business. We are determined
to see that the laws are enforced, or
that the public shall know the reason
why they are not. We have declared
an extermlnating war upon that sink of
pollution and DISGRACE to our civilization
kept by John Pinnell, and for this we
have only been assailed by the lowest
and vilest PORTION of society, who sym
pathize with him and are his tools in
maintaining his nefarious traffic. The
avengins spirit of too long suffering
and outraged community will soon COM
pei all such to hunt their holes,'' for
they are only curse and disgrace to
any civilized community. If we have
contributed in any way in bringing
about this result, we are more than COM
pensated for the ribaldry and abuse of
which we are made the object.
Year: 1872

EDITOR DISPATCH Again are the peo-
pie of Seattle brought under renewed
obligations to our City Council for COM
ing forward and making another effort
to rid our town of the effects Of the pol
lusiou continually arising from that
cess pool of iriquity- and others of like
nature that abound in our midst. 'Tis
true, it would have been better and
much more effectual, had they struck
at, and removed the cause, instead of
merely trying to arrest the effects. l
refer to the City Ordinance No. 80,
which says, ''any person leading an
idle, dissolute, an immoral, or profit
gate life, shall be deemed a vagrant;
and upon conviction thereof before the
City Recorder shall be fined in the sum
of not less than five dollars nor more
than one hundred; and in case of non
payment of said fine, shall be commit
ted to work for the use of the city, at
the city prison. until such fine shall be
paid by due course of law" Now let
the citizens see to it that this Ordinance
is put in execution, and its provisions
fully carried out. Let every one that is
leading dissolute, an idle, an immoral
or profigate life, Ono matter if they
be worth their thousand be brought
up before the City Recorder, and dealt
with in accordance with the provisions
of the Ordinance. Pity the Council
had not made the fine payable only in
work, thus giving the idle, the immoral,
the dissolute and the profigate among
the wealthy of our citizens chance to
exercise and strengthen their muscles,
and protect them tfor while at least)
from spending their time in riotous liv-
ing. Let not their wealth nor position
shield them from being promptly dealt
with. 1t is more necessary for the well
being of Seattle that those of her veal
thy citizens who are living in idleness
and debauchery should he made respon-
sible to the city, as provided in Ordi-
nance No, 32; than that a,few misera-
BILE beggars should be made to wo.k for
the use of the city. Those few half
starved wretchas, who have been robbed
of what little they possessed, in those
dens, (the sight of whose seething pol
lutions, would make even His Satanic
Majesty blush with shame) and then
turned out upon our streets to perish;
are not the ones that plant these places
in our midst, and support them with
their patronage and their money. 1t is
the wealthy, who living in idleness spend
their time in debauchery.


1t is high time that the tide of moral
and physical disease and death that is
surging and sweeping over our fair city
should be stayed and we doubt not that
the enforcement of City Ordinance No.
80, will have most salutary effect on
Year: 1872

is no way of Furnishing the knaves who
profited by his indiscretion.


The result OF the election upon the
whole is gratifying to all who desired
reform and very hopeful for the future.
Year: 1872

Life bears us on like the stream OF
a mighty river. Our boat at first
lolides down narrow channel
| through the playful murmurings of
the little brook and the windings OF
of the grassy borders. The trees
shed their young blossoms over our
heads; the flowers on the brink
seem to offer themselves to our young


hands; we are happy in hope and
grasp eagerly at the beauties
around; but the stream burries on
and still our hands are empty. Our
course in youth and manhood is


along a wider and deeper food,


amid ojects more striking and mag
Inificent. We are animated at the
moving picture of enjoyment and
industry passing around us-are
.excited at some short lived disap-


pointment. The stream bears US on,
and our joys and griefs are alike left


behind US. We may be ship
wrecked-we cannot be delayed;
whether rough or smooth, the river
hastens to its home till the roar of
the ocean is in our ears, and the
floods are lifted up around us; and


we take our leave Of earth and its
inhabitants, until Of our further
voyage there Is no witness save the
Infinite and Eternal.