smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1872

MISS ShUrtieN'S LOdycf.


"ln Japan every man is compelled
to marry as soon as his circumstances
arc such as to support WIFE"


Miss Sophronia Shurtleff laid down
the paper from which she had read
the sentence above quoted, and indulg-
ed in the following comment;


"And very excellent law it is, too.
am sure the japanese are a good
deal more intelligent than people give
them credit for. In that respect it
would be a good idea if Christian gov
ernments would pattern after them. |
only wish | had been born in Japan.
| think its a sin and a shame that a
good-looking girl of thirty-nine-ahem.
mean twenty-nine--should be living
in single blessedness, without hus-
band, or any prospect of one"


Sophronia Shurtleff, as the reader
has learned from her soliloquy, was a
maiden lady in comfortable circum-
stances, and lived in little. cottage
just out of the village of Cherryville.
As to her age, second thoughts might
be most polite, but were not most cor
rect. Though she made it a practice
to call herself twenty-nine, the town
clerk knew by his books that she was
within month of forty. She was
neither fat nor fair, however. Twen-
ty-five additional pounds would have
helped her figure amazingly, and as to
her face, if it had been little less sal
low, the nose a trife shorter, the eyes
less inclined to squint, and the cheeks
little fuller, the improvement would
have been so great that her most inti-
mate friends would not have known
her.


Still Sophronia considered herself
good looking girl" It's a mercy
homely people are unconscious of the
fact. / never knew person that did
not consider themselves at least passa-
Bile, and the uglest man it was ever
my lot to be acquainted with, was per-
petually looking in the looking glass.
Poor man, perhaps he was trying to
get accustomed to his peculiar style of
beauty.


There was one thing in which So
phronia agreed with her neighbors, and
that was if she ever expected to be
married it must be soon. She there
fore determined on q bold strike for q
husband. She had somewhere heard
that if a maintain will not come to
Mahomet, Mahomet must 90 to the
mountain, which, being interpreted
and applied to her own case, clearly
meant that since the beaux made no
advances, she must save them the troub-
lie.


Cherryville was not far from the
city, and being pretty village, was
considerably visited during the sum-
mer months by those who wished TO
ruralize. Now, taking the fact into
consideration, it all at once occurred
to Miss Sophronia that she might let
her front room to young gentleman
during the summer, and-ard-don't
you see, dear reader? OF course they
would be brought together considera-
bly, during the time, and perhaps by
her personal charms and the intima-
tion that she had some money in the
bank, she might induce him to propose
for her hand.


Accordingly the hopeful spinster
had the paint duly cleaned, till it look
ed like wax, the furniture polished,
and actually went to the expense of
new curtains for the front room, trust
ing that it might prove profitable in
vestment. All preparations Of this
nature being concluded, she put
placard in the window intimating that
Year: 1872

A circus company in Iowa owed an
editor bill for advertising and refused


to pay it. Thereupon the editor called
upon the Sheriff, who attached the
Bengal tiger and brought him around
to the newspaper Office in his cage.
He was placed in the eomposing-roOm,
and during, the first two days ne not
only consumed fifteen dollars worth of
beef, but he scratched six dollars worth
of troWsers from the leg ofa local rePor-
ter who .endeayored to stir him up with
a broom-handIe. to make him roar. On


the third day the tiger broke loose, and
the entire force of printers descended
the staircase with judici0us suddenness.


The editor was, alarmed to find his exit
through the composing-room cut of,
and that the latch upon the sanctum
door was broken. So he climbed out of
window and sought safety upon the
roof. The paper was not issued for
week, and even after the tiger was shot
the editor had to slide down the water
spout, because he was afraid to descend
by the route by which he came. .soijis
Year: 1872

We do not believe in jokes, especially
practical jokes, on grave subjects, and
do not blame that Ohio man for losing
his temper. He lost his wife first, and
had the usual consolatOry epitaph pre-
pared. AT about the same time a
genial youth departed this life Through
the fiery gates of delirium tremens,
and on visiting the grave of the. dear
departed this Ohio man found that the
wretched hewer and carver of the
marble had exchanged the epitaph and
his consolatory lines graced the tablet
OF the deceased reprobate.-M Y. AGit.
Year: 1872

CANNING EGGs.-All know how to
can peaches and other fruits; and the
canning of eggs, to keep them fresh, is
but little different. Place the eggs in
the jar, with the large end down; place
the Jar in boiling water, where let it
remain until the inner atmosphere Of
the Jar Is about blood heat, when seal
and teinove into cold water.
Year: 1872

A STRANGE DISCOVERY. Last Friday night
at eleven o clock the conductor Of the freight
train on the Northern Central Railroad was
very much surprised to see on his train with
the rest of the freight box of the most
elegant workmanship. It greatly excited bis
curiosity, owing to the extravaganza, as be
thought, Of placing it among such rough lot
of freight. If he was surprised at its appear
ance he was almost terrified, when the train
arrived at Woodberry, and became still, to hear
the cries of an infant proceeding therefrom: -
At first he could not believe it, but placing his
ear to the lid he could almost feel the breath
of the little prisoner upon bis cheek, crevicess
having been left for air. Hammer and chisel
we're speedily availed of, and in a few moments
a chubby faced, blue eyed, dimple checked lit
tie boy. not month old. was revealed to the
astonished spectators. 1t was placed in the
hands of lady living near by, who promises
to rear it, and it is proposed, if the conductor
will give his consent, to have it named after
him. The same evening before the train star
ed from the depot, we'll dressed man was
seen lurking about the place, and it is suppos-
ed that be was the owner of the nfaut,-Bah.
american.
Year: 1872

most necessary requisites to promote connubisi
hanuiness Indeed, without these the Journey
nrosuect rr hourly darkens to the view the mind
becomes shadowed with despair, and filed with
the melancholy reflection that the happiness OF
snothe is blighted with our own.
Year: 1872

The Weather I'm This City Yesterday.


The following record will show the changes in the
temperature for the past twenty four hours in CON-
parison with the corresponding day OF last year.
indicated by the thermometer at Hudnut's Phar-
Year: 1872

In the whole history Of science
there is nothing more wonderful
than the discovery or invention
Git would be difficult to say which
is the more correct term) Of spec
trum analysis. Thirteen years
ago it had no existence whatever
as a mode of scientific inquiry
Not five years had passed from
the day when Kirchhoff announced
the true meaning of the dark
lines in the solar spectrum, before
Higgins and Miller were telling
astronomers Of the terrestrial ele-
ments existing in the stars. Then
the great secret Of the gaseous
ncbule was revealed by Higgins,
and soon after the structure Of
comets began to interpreted. The
Importance Of the new mode Of
reserch in all problems Of chemi-
cal analysis, as delicate test for
determining the presence Of poi
sons as a means Of improving
many processes of manufacture,
and as an aid in almost every
branch of scientific inquiry, be-
come each year more clearly re-
cognized. We have seen Sorby
analyzing by It's means the color
ing-matter Of plants, and the en-
tomologist comparing the spec
trum Of the glow-worm and the
fire fly. The microscopic en-
ploys the powers Of the new an
alysis to solve problems which
the magnifying powers of his in
struments would be altogether
unable to cope with. Nothing, in
fine, seems too vast or too minute,
too distant or too near at hand,
for this wonderful instrument of
research, which deals as readily
with the mass of Sirius, a thou
sand times larger and a million
times farther away than our sun,
as with ten-thousandth part Of a
grain Of matter in a fame within
a few inches Of the spectroscopic
| tube.-Spectdt0r.
Year: 1872

There is nothing more likely to
result in successful career than
confident self:reliance. 1t is as
tonishing how much more q youth
will accomplish who relies upon
himself, than one who depends
upon others for assistance. Ha7-
ing first ascertained the direction
in, and the means by which his
object is to be reached, let him
put his whole energies to work,
and with unaagging Industry press
forward. The young man who,
instead Of rising at five sleeps till
seven or eight, and who spends
his evening on the corners, or in
the companionship Of those who
are wanting in laudable ambition,
rarely ever wins position of hon
or achieves a reputation above
that enjoyed by the common
masses. In country like ours,
where the avenues to honor and
wealth are open to all, there is no
reasonable excuse that can be Of
fered for a mans failure to achieve
one or the other, or both. III
health or extraordinary misfortune
may keep him down, but these arc
the exceptions that establish the
rule. Few men know Of how
much they are capable until they
have first thoroughly tested their
abilities. An hour Of each eve
ming, spent with some good author,
or in the study of some branch Of
uesful science, will, in the course
of a few years, give to young
man who thus devotes this small
portion ofhis time an amount of in
formation, literary and scientific,
which cannot fail to fit him for
positions to which he could never
properly aspire without the atten-
ton to study.
Year: 1872

The following letter appears in
the New York Democrat:


From 1881 to 1884 was carry
ing on the bushes ofstereotyping
at PIG William street, and most Of
the time was employing great
many compositors, not q few of
whom have since earned large
share Of fame in the world. From
the days Of Franklin even to those
of Greeley the composing room
has graduated its full quota Of the
men who have distinguished them
selves in the history of the coun-
try. Why shouldn't the institu-
ton be incorporated, have a fac
ulty, and the authority to confer
degrees? Why shouldn't it make
LII. D's as we'll as old Harvard?


It was in 1882 or 1888, I think,
that being at one time much in
need Of more compositors, asked
those in the Office to let the fact
be known at their respective board
ing houses. Among others who
applied for work in response to
this call was queer looking chap
brought in by one of the hands in
the Office. He was ofrather more
than medium height; his hair was
almost white: his face quite so,
and entirely beardless, and he
walked with a shufling uncertain
gait. He wore very old white
hat and fustian pantaloons which
did not come down to his boots,
and these completed a personality
which l had never met with in a
compositor, and turning to Sey-
mour, who brought him in, l in
quired if that fellow was a COM
positor. He replied, "He's aqueer-
looking fellow but they say he's a
good workman" Being too much
in want Of help to be very particu-
lar about the personal appearance
of q compositor, I gave him case
and copy, and you may judge Of
my surprise when tell you that
his weekly bills exceeded by from
thirty to fifty per cent. those Of
the other compositors by his side
who were on the same work. And
what was equally remarkable, no
matter how rapidly he picked up
the type with his fingers. the
stream Of talk that rolled from
his tongue was never interrupted.
He talked incessantly. When he
made out his first bill I learned
that his name was Horace Gree
ley.


In those days he was q compost
tor, and he was good one. He
set type rapidly and made q clean
proof. When he was a young
man he did his work we'll, and now
that he is an old one, and there is
a big "take" ahead to give out, |
propose that we give it 10 MIN.
J. S. REDFIELD.
New York, July 10, 1872.
Year: 1872

Honor Your LABoR.-Do not be
above your business. He who turns
his nose up at his work, quarrels
with his bread and butter. He is
a poor smith who is afraid of his
own spark; there is some discom-
fort in ali trades except chimney
sweeping. If sailors gave up going
to sea because ofthe wet; if bakers
left off baking bread because it
was hot work; if plowmen would
not plow because Of cold, and
tailors would not make our clothes
for fear of pricking their fingers,
what pass we would come to.
Nonsense, my fine fellow, there's
no shame about any honest calling;
don't be afraid of soiling your
hands, there's plenty of soap to be
had. All trades are good to good
traders. Lucifer matches may pay
we'll if you sell enough Of them.
You cannot get honey ifyou arc
frightened at the bees, nor plant
corn if you are afraid to get mud
on your boots. When bars Of iron
melt under the South winds; when
you dig theft with tooth-picks,
blow ships along with afan, ma
nure the crops with lavender wa
ter, and grow plum cakes in
fower-pots, there will be fine
time for all, but until the millen-
mum comes we shall have a deal
to put up with.
Year: 1872

WHAT NEXT Pin the upper
part of Lee county lives q gentle
man who had a bull dog Of the
female persuasion which had five
puppies. In a fight with a huge
moccasin she was bitten several
times and died Of the wounds.
The pups were only twenty days
old. He priced them muchly,
and devised the following for their
support. He had a female goat
which had lost her kids. He
caught the goat and taught the
pups to draw their daily lecteal
rations from her. But he had to
catch her first with another dog.
She became shy and wouldn't
come about the house, so be had
to 60 with his dog after her, in a
few days she learned what she
had TO do and now all he does
is to see her and whistle for bis
dog and she makes for the house,
leaps the yard fence and calls up
her strange nurselings, and while
in the yard she will not allow the
dog to approach them and ap.
pears very much attached to them
The pups should be named Ro'
mulus and Remus.-Sumte7 Re.
gubHcan.
Year: 1872

Be ALWAYS STICKING IN A TREE.
Jack, when you hae naething
else to do, be ye sticking in o
tree; it will be growing whenyou
are sleeping"


The above death-bed injunction
of the old Scot to his son, is well
worthy the attention and accep'
tance Of all sons Of modern days.
If closely followed, it could not
do otherwise than lead to many a
paying investment, for every tree
in the right place is a thing Of
value, and If put there in au "odd
SPELL" it may be reckoned as
having been obtained at next to
no cost. And since each year ad,
ded to it's age increases it's size,
and, consequently, it's value, the
insignificant outlay necessary to
obtain, and place it into position,
may be counted so much capital,
put out at compound interest.


EIthange.
Year: 1872

THE SMITH FAMILY.-We give
place to the following as the only
satisfactory explanation we have
met with concerning the generos-
ity with which the world has
been besprinkled with a certain
inoffending family:


1t has always been s. mystery
to US where all the Smiths came
from but while lately visiting a
neighboring city, the matter was
satisfactorily explained by the ap'
pearance Of a large sign over the
door Of a factory, with the an
nouncement that this was the
"Smith Manufacturing Company
Year: 1872

How TO ENJOY LIFE.-It is won
derful to what an extent people believe
happiness depends on not being
obliged to labor. Honest hearty, con-
tended labor is the only source of
happiness, aswell as the only guarantee
of life. Idleness and luxury induce
premature decay much faster than
many trades regarded as the most ex-
haustive and fatal to longevity. La
bor in general actually increases the
term of life. It is the lack of occu-
patton that annually destroys so many
of the wealthy, who, having nothing
to do, play the part Of drones, and,
like them. make a speedy exit, while
the busy bee fills out its day in use
fulness and honor.
Year: 1872

There is no word in the En-
glish vocabulary that is more mu-
slcal, or soul-stirring, than the
word Home. There are few, l
imagine, who have not expert
enced its effect, though it is rela-
ted Of the author Of the beautiful
poem, "Home, Sweet Home" that
he never had a home, and often
times, as he passed the magnif-
cent abodes of the afluent, and
heard the inmates chanting his
song, he had not where torepose his
head, nor a penny to purchase
the next meal. We frequently
see a splendid mansion, furnished
in the most elegant style. Ma
ture and art are almost exhausted
in endeavoriug to beautify it, that
it may render to the possessor's
happiness !; but it fails to perform
it's office if love is wanting. II
does not deserve the name OF
home if the heart is not there
The inmates merely abide in q
place of magnificent misery. II
would be mocking to apply the
epithet OF Home. Have you not
seen the rough soldier, or sailor


who apparently had lost all ten


derness, or affection, weep over 8
Year: 1872

The stories CT the man aud wife
who came to grief in a dispute as
to whether it was a rat or mouse
that crossed the room, and Of that
no less historic couple who died
the death, in a quarrel, Of "knife
or scissors" are both put toshame
by a married twain in Jackson,
Tenn. Having a little dispute as
to which way q bed should be
placed in an apartment, the hus.
band convinced his unruly spouse
simply by beating her to death.
Year: 1872

CANADA, AND OUR CONHERCL4L ROUTES.


Facts are not only sometimes stranger
than fiction, but they are always stronger
than fiction, and it is about time the spread
eagle fiction that Canada has more need of
us, than we of her, were exploded. This
absurd notion originated in the days when
no land north Of Illinois, and Iowa, was
thought to possess any agricultural value.
If the premises were true, the conclusion
would have been Just that the United States
were altogether independent Of the friend
ship, or assistance, of Canada. But a new
face is put upon matters by the discovery
in later years, that the broad belt along our
northwestern border is the richest Of the
whole land in agricultural capacity, n rniss-
ing wealth, in timber supply, in manulac-
turing resources, in the live stock and dali
ry interest, and in al that can attract capi-
tai, and immigration, and build up a com
mercial empire.


The natural water outlet of this region is
the St. Lawrence river. The natural outlet
by land would be q railway along the south
shore of Lake Superior, running in prac-
teal air line to Portland, lie. But here we
are met by the unwelcome fact that both
these routes lie through foreign territory.
a glance at the map win show that the
State Of Maine, and . goodIy portion OF
New England in general, as well as Of New
York, lie in the latitude Of tire great fertile
belt Of the west. Yet Canada projects It
self across their best line Of commercial
transit, and nearly to their southern border,
in the shape Of an irregular wedge, or in
yerted pyramid, whose base is about 7o0
miles long, and whose perpendicular is be-
tween 400 and 800 miles deep Since the
beginning of the Northwestern develop
ment, Portland, Boston, and New York, are
all seeking connections with the St Law
renee at Ogdensburg, aud with The Cana
dian Pacific at Montreal, thus plainly show
ing how important is the maintaining of
close and amicable relations with country
reaching SO far into the hear, OF our best
territory.
Year: 1872

the New York of the Lakes, and the New
Y ork Of the ocean. Each train will be made
up of three cars, and an engine, and so
over the track in one day. Running rate
viii be forty miles an hour; no stoppages
save for furnace and boiler supplies. The
ears will be new in make and pattern; each
three rods in length and built for racing,


We, on Lake Superior, may now hope to
get the New York papers within three days
time. But there is suIl room for improve
ment west of Chicago. There needs to be
a fast mail train between that place and St
Paul and Lake Superior
Year: 1872

In old times the mail train was the slow
train 1t ran twenty miles an hour, and
stopped at all stations, while the fast pas
senger express made its seventy miles every
two hours, and stopped but twice, or thrice,
in a state. Woe to the wight who then
took the mail train for long trip to the
sea board. Passengers by the express
would distance him half day, or more.
But things have changed. Lucky the man
now, that can frank himself a passenger by
the great, new, through mail train between
Chicago and New York city. The Post
Office Department that has been qual ter
of century behind the age, has ~ walked
up, and will hereafter run a special light
ming train over the thousand miIes-less
eight and thirty-that intervene between
Year: 1872

RUMoEED that Lake Superior is to have
4 south shore railroad in IS months. Il
would not be a surprising fact, if literally
true. The next year and a half viii see a
wonderful change in the whole Lake Supe-
rior region.
Year: 1872

KILLING OF INFANTS BY CATs.-Ihe an
nouncement last week that an infant Of
Mr. Herrick Of Portland, Nc, lost it. life
by cats sucking its breath has brought out
a correspondent # the New York Tribune,
who thinks death from sucking breath very
improbable and an old superstition. lie
saws: do not doubt the death Of the child,
or that the animal was present at the time;
but that a eat sacked It's breath. " or would
or could do 50. must be regarded as a piece
of gross supersititious ignorance; as such i
Is hurtful and ought not to pass unchallengt
ed. Death i a serious matter, and therefore
this subject must be treated seriously, other
wise it were easy to ridicule the assumption
made. which | do not now meet with for
the first time Let me- say then that a eat
could have no possible motive for sucking
4 child's breath, even if 1t were possible to
do 50. The breath Of any animal after 1t
has once entered the lungs Is disagreeable
and poisonous, and we know Of no animal
with a liking for such air. Are We to sup
pose that the eat applied its lips closely to
those Of the child and exhausted the lungs
Of the latter by filling its own If 50, what
next? The cat must breathe or die. II II
breathes, the child viii breathe also and live
But it may be said that the cat places its
mouth in such proximity to that of the
child as to intercept the pure air, and 50
''suck in" that which the child required


This would involve the death of the cat first
for it Is the smaller animal: and the cbild's
mouth must also be in the proper position to
intercept the pure air reqired bv the cat


That the latter, either from malienitv or
affection, would Voluntarily suffer semi
suffocation FOX moment, is Of course absurd


In fact the statement isabsurd. Altogether and
itwould require theclosest circumstantial des-
cription of tine way in which the act was
performed, and that by disinterested OBJ
server, to entitle the assertion even to the
consideration here given. The true explana-
ton of such cases is doubtless very simple.
The cat lay upon the child's mouth, and so
smothered it, or upon its stomach and chest,
and, by its weight, tired the respiratory
muscles 50 that they gradually ceased to act,
and the poor little infant to breathe. Let
me say, in conclusion, that such accidents
are frequently facilitated by the senseless way
Year: 1872

| ain sorry for persons vino always see the
had first, and the good last, or never.
Whether in be in art, or whether it be in
the conduct of affairs, or whether il be In
social life, one should know what is harmo-
ny and what is discord, what Is straight
and what is crooked. what is right and what
is wrong. A man who is strongly sensitive
to the beautiful and true and right. is in A
healthy condition Of mind-and health is
the most beautiful thing in the world. In
the plant, in its place; in the animal. in its
place; in society, in its place; in all parts
of the mental economy, healthy. normal
condition-that is the thing which Is the
most attractive Beecher.