Year: 1876

|. EDITORIAL POSTSCRIPT.
! When Two men have hard brush, one Of
them generally gets well combed down.


While everybody else is going TO the Centen-
nial, 1t might be proper to. announce that
Anna Dickinson is going on the stage.


"Disentaugle your eyelash" and smash In
your hustle" are the latest expressions used
in Vassar. They do not sound as well as they
might, but they mean great deal.


A wild rumor was In circulation about to vn
yesterday that Henry Clay Dean had taken a
bath in the waters of the Upper Potomac. II
this is so, the people of Washington Will have
to drink muddy water all summer.


Frederick Douglass, in conversation the
other day, said: "The only safe ship for the
colored race to float down the current of life
in is the Republican ship; all outside of that
is a vast sea, turbulent, boisterous and full of
danger"


| OF course, in this Centennial year we don't
want to fight; but should those Mexican greas-
ers continue to heap cruel indignities on Amer
ican citizens, the probabilities are that there
will not be as much peace along the Rio
Grande as there might be.


Senator Spencer's investigation has cost the
Government nearly twelve thousand dollars;
Minister Schenck's about ten Thousand; the
Navy Department about twenty Thousand; the
other Departments about two hundred thou
sand dollars. And that is the way the money
goes.


The Norwegians have their Diet of Worms
now. After violent storm recently in Nor
way a large number of worms were found
crawling over the snow, and it was impossible
to find from whence they came. 1t is gener-
ally believed, however, that they wormed
themselves out of the clouds.


When Custer city buried its first dead the
other day there was but one Bible in the town
from which 10 select the text. After all, one
Bible answered the purpose as well as a dozen
would have done, and one text was really
more than the fellow asked for. He was shot
in the act OF picking another mans teeth with
q large bowie-kn


Visions of future wealth float daily through
the mind OF the average Philadelphia saloon
keeper in anticipation of his immense sales of
liquid during the Centennial. 1t is estimated
that over sixty millions of straws aud one
billion of tooth picks will be used during the
exhibition. Now lot them estimate the num-
Der Of pockets to be picked and mathematical
science will have crowned itself with lsurels.


The citizens of the District will meet en-
ndsse at Willard hall tonight, at o'clock,
for the purpose of making preliminary ar
rangements for the grand Centennial Jubilee
or May musical festival. Hundreds of thou
sands of strangers will visit the city during the
Centennial, and Washington should do some
thing to make their visit lively and interest
ing. All the musical talent in the country
should lend their aid in this great and pa-
triotic enterprise.


There is neither blood on the face of the
moon nor any frst-class wars or rumors of
wars, and yet Field Marshal Murat Halstead
has winged his way suddenly to the East.
What can It meani Are the three grand
President making Cyclops-Halstead, Bowles
and Watterson-to meet in secret conclave
and by the sheer force of their giant intellects
and monstrously wretched past experience to
cOncOCL q Sc0eIne lOt new Inlru party! Ii
so, let the unfortunate man on whom they fall
as their Presidential victim take warning from
the sad fate of Mr.. Greeley and the middle
party nag.


The South Carolina Republicans deserve
the thanks of decent men everywhere for the
prompt manner in which they rebuked the
advepturer Chamberlain In their State con-
vention on the 11th inst. Chamberlain was
recognized all over the North as a scurvy pol
iticisn, mere adventurer, who was elevated
to position by the too-contiding Republicans
of that State. Chamberlain is now discom-
flied, but Republicans should keep their eyes
upon him, lest he do the party some serious
injury. The power of appointing election
commis sioners should be taken from his
hands, and that prerogative performed BY
trustworthy persons. Too much praise can
not be accorded Messrs. Elliott, Sevsiles,
Gieayes and other gentlemen who led the op-
position to Chamberlain. They have signal
lied themselves, and honest men everywhere
applaud their meritorious action. Chamber
lain having been rendered harmless we bid
him ddieu, and commend him to the tender
mercies of his Ku-Klux allies, and especially
to the descendants Of the Ground Heads and
Huguenots" of the Palmetto State.