Year: 1876

cratic Party. s
10 the Editor of the Morristown Gazette:


/ COUSIN JoHN: I am becoming per


fectly disgusted with this Govern


ment of ours-or rather some of the
people. The more I see OF it the


worse like it. Talk about a free


and republican form of Government


1 would like to see where the free.


dom comes in. The fact is, a man


is allowed no privileges here at all,


worth living for. and if the Demo
Gratis were to get full power and con-


troll of'this Government once, some
man would get a rope tied around
his neck and be throwed out in the
wind, where it was over his head,
and drown. and all this, perhaps, for
nothing more than exercising what
he might consider the privileges of a
free country! What privileges do
we enjoy, anyway? They make a
poor man pay dollar year for
keeping dog, which is considered a
Iife-guard, while asrieh man can keep
double-breasted aodtch-guard. worth
five times as much as the dog, with
out paying i cent. The Democrats
done this, too. They pretended that
they passed this law to protect the
sheep. This is certainly a very
strange way TO protect sheep. Why
didn't they pass q law making it a
capital ofense for dog to kill a
sheep in the first degree; and that
the penalty for the same should be
death. And for killing a sheep in
the second degree, manslaughter,
punishable by Imprisonment for life );
or for an assault and. battery upon
a defenseless or unarmed sheep, fine
and imprisonment. Or, why not let
the sheep protect themselves? Most
of sheep are as big as any common
sized dog, and if they were only we'll
trained in pugilistic exercises while
young, as they ought to be, one
sheep could whip two dogs. The
fact is. we have no privileges as we
once had.t4e f99taaa 5afR III s3ael


Cast. your eye up toward Wash
ington City. the capital Of our Ma
ton. See the performances of that
Democratic InyestigatingCommittee,
and you will discover at once that
man has but, few privileges in this
country. No matter what man
does, or how sly he is about it, if
there happens to be something a lit
tie crooked about it, they are sure to
find it out on him; and when they
find it out the balance of mankind
soon knows it; but more especially
is this the case if he happens TO be a
Republican ofice-holder-the very
man of all others who should be al
lowed all the privileges of a Repub-
lican Government. A man can't
even have the privilege of disposing
of trading post on the frontiers
without being exposed. If one of
the chief moguls of our nation hap
pens to clip the coupons from few
thousand gallons of whisky, it is
soon reported all over the country
that he has been dealing in crooked
whisky. What does that amount to?
Who ever saw any straight whisky !?
It's made crooked. The very worm
it runs through as it is being manu-
facGured is as crooked as new
ground corn row, and it will even
make man walk crooked, if it is
ever so good.


Why, Cousin John, it has got SO
that even the President of the United
States can't vote himself a little
back pay without being accused of
defrauding his Government. Whose
Governments is this Amt it the
President s? And if so, don't all
the money and the people too belong
to him? And hasn't he a right to
use that money and the people as he
may see fit? And don't he, though?


Then what right has a Democratic
Investigating Committee to say any
thing about back or double back sal
aries? or crooked whisky? or any
thing else? Or, in other words, what
right have Democrats. to investigate
these things? What right have they
to hold office? What right have the
people to vote for them? None at
all! This is Republican Govern
ment, and this whole thing of inves.
tigation is humbug, gotten up to
deprive Republican office-holders
from enjoying the rights and privi-
leges of free and Republican peo-
plea privilege they fought four
long years to obtain.


A pretty pass, indeed, when Re-
publican office-holders can't sell a
few ships and appropriate the pro-
ceeds thereof to their own use, or
dodge the revenue on whisky, or
take little extra pay for home mis-
sions, without being censured By
Democrats. No good and true Re-
publican will object to a thing OF
this sort, for he knows what is right,
and that if the Government is de.
priyed of these little privileges, our
Republican form of government
ceases at once. Deprive us not oil
the blessed privileges of Republi
can form of governments and. in the
language of the poet, s. Let no guilty
man escape BAsCUM.


An uptown man, who believes in


self-improvement, suggested to hi:
wife recently that they should argue


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