smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1870

made an egregious donkey, and won't
know it until you read this article.


If you will permit us to remind you'
THOMAS, you don't deny the very propo'
sition on which your rascality as
representative depends. You fail to
say, OF to have said for you, that yor
did not put your name, or have II
placed, to the endorsement upon that
letter addressed you by FoGG, CARPER
and others. And lest the fact may
escape you, we will tell fyou why you
evade denial and seek to produce the
same effect by indirection. 1t is because
you know the original paper to be il
existence, and for the further reason
that you fear its production in this city
Your fears are well grounded, THOMAS,
for the delightful document will proba-
bly, oscar your eyeballs" before the ses-
sion ends.


And then you tell us, THOMAS, OF the
III natl onsof your enemies to defeat
you and appeal for public sympathy in
view of your past suffslings as a canai-
date. We think you got even with
them, THOMAS, that time you suddenly
returned and Sd unexpectedly entered
the Convention at Bdckhannon. You
state that had bombsholl burst in
their midst, your enemies would not
have displayed greater CONSERVATION
ban they did at your appearance. b.
That was your triEmph and recompense
THOMAS. AS we understand it, the
startling elements of d burstsd bomb
sh ell are the noise and stencil. You are
a beautiful bombshell, THOMAS, and We
should really like to see you explode
after due preparation. If your "bust'
at Buckhannon was anything like the
"bust" in which you INDUCED upon
Thursday night week, we are not sur
prised at the "consternation" yeur ere,
mics displayed, for beyond all peradven-
ture you are the ugliest man when
drunk ever seen in these parts.


In conclusion, THOMAS, after dis
graciDg yourself by breaking the faith
to which your honor was pledged, you
permitted yourself to be made ninny
of by the prompters of your card. II
has only led you into deeper waters
You remember, THOMAS, when you
came to the editor of this paper with
that dismal whine of yours, complain
ing of injustice having been done you
You remember you asked for leave to
set yourself right before the people
through the REGISTER, and were told
you could say what you pleased and as
you pleased through its columns. You
remember that you sniyelled about be-
ing unable to write your own card and
were told in pol to terms that your men
tai deficiencies would be supplied and
your explanation written up in decent
shape for you. You remember that in
your big BOBBY way you expressed your
thankful acceptance of the courtesy,
and that afterward you permitted your
relf to be made the vehicle of nnother's
spite toward the man who extended shat
courtesy to you. Think ofthis, THOMAS
and ask yourself if in addition to want
ing the nerve to he honest toward your
constituents You do not lack the COM
mon sense to be decent toward these
who pity your lost and miserable con-
dition.
Year: 1870

The Senate resumed the consideration
of Senate bill No "a, to create fund


for internal Improvements. The propO-
sition to assess direct tax of two cents
on each one hundred dollars worth of
real and personal property, was adopted


aud the bill ordered to third reading.
Year: 1870

others a helmet, lance, or q haversack; indeed,
there was large company from Brussels each pro-
vided with relic of this kind, one leading horse
which a French officer had presented to him. AS TO
the peasantry, they dare not touch any OF these
spoils, they are afraid to become objects OF the
terrible discipline Of the Prussans. Those OF
them who had been taken with arms in their
hands, when the Prussians captured villages
after a desperate resistance were either shot
or hung the following day. at one place no
less than 800 were suspended by the neck from
trees Several citizens OF Sedan have been more or
less injured during the action, and if the lombard
ment had taken place very few OF them would nave
escaped. AS soon as the csptuaton was decided
upon the military chests OF the different corps
d'armee were divided. Several generals and supe-
ror officers retired with large sums, one colonel
having got no less than 10000 francs in gold. just
before the entrance of the Prussans all the notes Of
the branch of the Bank Of France were by authority
ordered to be burned The Germans, however, made
good prizes as for instance, the eve of the
surrender convoy Of So 900 ratons intended for the
French army fell into their hands. Notwithstanding
the continual removal of wounded there were two
days ago 300 at Sedan without the slightest help Of
Kind.
Year: 1870

Very painful scenes are still witnessed upon the
Sedan battlefield. The wife OF French general
wandered for days it, seeking for her husband,
from whom she had had no word OF any kind for
three weeks. She had also a son engaged in the
fighting OF last week. but she was informed that he
numerous yet their presence does not fail to give
life. TO the devastated field They wander about,
maintaining a religious silence, and communicating
their impression 10 one another with Dated breath


They are, however, eager In collecting solve-
niTs Of the great struggle, some taking sabre,
Year: 1870

SPEAK. OUT.-There are some natures
which never grow large enough to speak
out and say bad act is a bad act, until
they have inquired into the politics or
nationality of the man who did it. And
they are not really; scarce either. Cain
is branded murderer SO heartily and
nnanimously'in in America, only because
he was neither Democrat or Republi-
can The Feegee Islanders abuse of Cain
ceased very suddenly when the white
man mentioned casually that Cain was a
Feegee Islander. The next remark of
the savage, after an awkward pause, was !:
MEL, what did Able come fooling around
there for p s
Year: 1870

BY the English mail at this port we have our fles
rrom the coast OF Aflica, dated at Cape OF Good
Hope to the 21th or August. The journals supply
ample details OF the history and yield and mode OF
working OF the diamond fields OF the colony. The
exhibit Is OF quite Interesting and really exciting
character. We present the most prominent features
OF the report to oar readers to-day.
Year: 1870

How IT HAPPENEU.-Once upon a
time gentleman found in his hen
roost a simple minded soul in the
vicinity, who lives without any yisi-
bic means Of support.


"What are you doing here, you
rascal? Stealing my chickens p


"No, sir" was the response, 81
amt thought of doing nothin' of the
Sort It unfortunately happened
that the simple-minded individual
wore high straw hat of the dimen-
sions of bee hive, and the crown
thereof was dilapidated to serious
extent. Just as he put in his denial,
the head of half grown pullet was
seen to prctsude from the aperture.


''See there said the gentleman,
chow did that chicken get in your
hat ?"


"Well!' exclaimed the simple
minded individual, with an air of
honest surprise and embarrassment,
"that is the strangest thing that ever
happened to me. I suppose the
darned thing must have crawled up
my ro~ser leg
Year: 1870

An extraordinary fallacy is the
dread of night-air. What air can
we breathe at night but night air :?
The choice is between pure night
air from without and foul night air
from within. Most people prefer
the latter. An unaccountable choice


What will they say, if it is proved


to be true that fully one half of all
the diseases we suffer from is occa-
sion by people sleeping with their
windows shut? An open window,


most nights in the year, can never
hurt any one. This is not to say
that light is not necessary for re-
covery. In great cities, nightair
is often the best and purest air to
be had in twenty -four hours. I
could better understand shutting
the windows in town during the
day than during the night, for the
sake of the sick. The absence of
smoke, the quiet, all tend to make
night the best tire for airing the
patient One of our highest medi-
cal authorities on consumption and
climate, has told me that the air in
London is never so good as after
ten o'clock at night. Always air
your room, then, from the outside
air, if possible. Windows are made
to open, doors are made to sllu1;-
a truth which seems extremely diff
cult of apprehension. Every room
must be aired from without,
passage from within. But the few
er passages there are IN d hospital
the better Florence Nightingale.
Year: 1870

1t Is said that Horace Greely In
tends to petition Congress to pass
the following law, affecting tobacco
consumers, at its session this win
ter:


Tobacco chewers are requested
to get their tobacco from first hands,
which is the first man you meet who
will give you chew.


Where parties are in the habit of
borrowing cllews, the Government
will furnish each man with note
book, in which the time of the day,
the size of the quid, whether plug
or finecut, the quality and the time
which the amount is to be refunded,
must be strictly recorded.


Those parties who have been in
nocently useing unstamped tobacco
will call on the nearest revenue of
ficer and give in as near as possible,
the amount which they believe has
been consumed. The officer will
furnish the necessary stamps, and if
they are chewed up in his presence
the Government is then satisfied
that no criminal wrong has been
meant.


Those persons who maliciously
carry two boxes, one filed with base
smoking tobacco to-give to borrow
ers, the other containing superb fine
cut for home consumption, are to be
treated as worthy of death, and lung
on the spot.


No tobacco box must have more
than two spigot holes in in it, and
the stamps must be pasted directly
over them.


When a quid has beer exhausted,
the Government strictly fotbid5 its
being thrown away until two red
chalk marks have been made across
it and label attached bearing these
words: "The fellow who chewed
this has complied with all the re
quirements Of the law, and persons
are hereby warned not to chew this
quid again."


Tobacco consumers must con-
stantly bear in mind that the
more stamps there are on package
of tobacco the cheaper does the
weed become-in horn.
| The Government strictly forbids
the use Of those tobacco boxes hav
ing a concealed needle inside the
knob on the cover, by which one
forgets his desire for a chew aftel
having the instrument run into his
thumb about foot.


The Government has witnessed
with supreme sorrow many young
men, and old men also, when they
observed an acquaintance smoking
a cigar, come right out bold and
ask :'Have you got the mate to that :?
Hereafter, in all such cases, the per
son asked will exhibit the following
label, which the Government will
furnish on demand: "Ask me fol
ten cents.
Year: 1870

There is only one thing in tue
created world that we love better
than boy, and that is girl. |
A boy who will not make mud pies,
and carry broken glass in his pocket,
and lick any other boy lie is able to,
and tear his trowsers every. day,
and put peas in his little sisters
ear, and break the sewing mashiDe,
and steal jam, and take the bowels
out of the clock. and climb, and
slide, and jump, and pitch, and yell,
and make his mother wish she was
dead, and be an eternal, unresting
nuisance to everybody from the
time he is born till he reaches the
age of really manhood-w say,
boy who will not do all these, and
more, is not fit to live and ought to
be drowned like weak kitten.


Noise is the boys natural element.
He can easier exist without bread
than without noise. 1t is sign of
health, and vigorous physical and
mental growth. So we are in favor
of boys-and noise.


But we put it to you5 fellow bus
ters Of the noisy persuasion-Do
you think it is quite the thing, in a
crowded street, with fiery horses
whirling gay vehicles at two forty
gate, and many helpless little ones
| Just on tbs way home for the night,
to throw firecrackers under the said
horses heels, or fire your pistol in
the said little ones ears? Come,
now, is it gentlemanly to frighten
poor children, who are not big
enough to wallop a fellow if they
don't like it?


You say it was ga very green
trick for that countryman to leave
his wagon with the horses un-
hitched,' and we agree with you
that it would be most excruciating
fun to fire your pistol off or let off
a bundle of fire crackers, and scare
the horses wild, until they would
ruin off and tear things, and perhaps
kill child or two, or frighten two
or three other teams so as to have
a general diabolfcal good time,


Here comes boy ON horseback
| Go for him! He can hardly hold on
as it is, and one fire cracker we'll
directed will insure a broken leg OF
or a broken head for him! Now.
there is scarcely boy living that
could resist such an opportunity as
this. But don't you think, leaving
noise out of the question, it would
be beastly cruel thing to do?


There goes a dog! Fair game
for any boy! "Poor fellow-come
here-good dog-poor fellow y
One boy strokes his head, and
another goes to the rer with bunch
of fire crackers to tie fast-ther
touch 'em off, and see him run and
howl! Fun alive, isn't it? But
lust outside the noise you know
don't YOU think it YVES q sneakine
trick to fool dog so, and wasn't il
inhuman and unmanly to pretend
| friendship for a chance to torture
i Oh, we are not lecturing you
! not q bit. We like you too we'll
and we like the noise, and all that
! But, boys, when you get to be mer
you will learn, or ought to learn
that the liberty Of the individual
must not be permitted to destroy
the liberty Of the many. And this
J means, that you have no right te
have your fun at the expense of des


troying the enjoyment of others
TColumbs Journal.
Year: 1870

To-day we are striving, pushing,
grasping after wealth, honor, power,
and pleasure. The poor claim
wealth that they may be above
want, the rich seek to add to their
countless thousands. So are. we
rushing forward, reckoning not the
final result of our probationary ex
istence. No one ever appears to
think how soon we must sink into
oblivion-that we are one genera
ton of millions Yet such is the
fact. Time and progress lave,
through countless ages, come march
ing hand in hand--the one destroy
ing, the other building up. They
seem to create little or no commo-
ton, and tie work Of destruction is
as easily and silently accomplished
as child will pull to pieces a rose.
Yet such is the fact. A hundred
years hence, and much that we now
see around US will too have passed
away. 1t is but the repetition of
life's story; we are born, we live,
we die. Think then of the sJuls
that are above, imperishable> The
souls of countless millions still
exist in punishment or in bliss.


We all within our g.laves shall sleep


hundred yeas to come;


Noliving soul for us will weep


A hundr ed years to come.


But otter men our land will till.


An :. other men our streets will fill,


And other birds will sing as gay,


AS bright the sunshine as to-day,
A hundred years to come.
Year: 1870

The Oil City Times is response 4
BILE for the following-:.


On Tuesday morning last. as Mr..
VIM. Thompson, assisted by Robert
r. Smith, was engaged in making an
excavation near tile house of the
former, about a half a mile north
of West Hickory, preparatory to
erecting derrick, they exhumed an
enormous helmet of iron, corroded
with rust Further digging brought
to light a sword, which measured
nine feet in length. Curiosity in
cited them to enlarge the hole, and
after some little time they discov-
cred the bones of two enormous
feet. Following up the "lea,r' they
had so unexpectedly struck, in a
few hours time they had unearthed
a we'll preserved skeleton of an
enormous giant, belonging to spe-
cies of the human family which
probably Inhabited this and other
parts of the world at that time, of
which the Bible speaks, when it
says: "And there were giants in
those days. The helmet is said to
be of the shape Of those found
among the ruins of Nineveh. The
bones of the skeleton are remark
ably white. The teeth are all in
their places, ,and all of them are doub-
le,and of extraordinary size. These
relics have been taken to Tionesta,
where they are visited by large numb
ers of people daily. When his giant
ship was in the flesh, he must have
stood eighteen feet in Ills stockings.
These remarkable relics will be for
warded to New York early next


week. The joints of the skeleton
are now being glued together
These remains were found about
twelve feet below the surface of {
mound which had been thrown ur
probably centuries ago, and which


was not more than three feet above
the level Of tie grounu around it


Here is another nut for antiquari


ans to crack.
Year: 1870

During the summer of 1867, q
Roston gentleman. together with his
wife and widowed sister were in
Paris. OF course they, among the
other wonders of the French capi


tai, went to hear Pere. Hyacinthe.
The widow, who is young, has but
one child and is quite wealthy, fell
in love with the Pere. Finally
meetings were brought about, at
which she expressed so much JOY
that the feeling became mutual. Al
though the Carmelite had begun to
express himself freely in public re-
garding religious matters, he did not
go far enough to suit his female
adorer, who had more extended
views, both religious and political,
regarding matters in a monarchical
country, where church and state are
so closely allied. Under the tutel-
age of the Boston lady the priest
became more and more outspoken
in his views, and finally, events cul-
minated in his retirement from his
monastic orders, and it was sup


posed he had gone to Passy to keep
quiet. It was not known for some
time in France that he had gone TO
America; but he, as everybody no W
knows, came here, and after remain


ing in this city some weeks. so as to
get rid Of all taint of suspicion, went
to Boston, where he met the lady
who had drawn him hither. It is
with the intention of settling pri-
vate affairs in France that he re-
turned; but before long, as has been
limited, he will return to America
and probably remain here, and marry
the lady who has drawn him away
from fatherland and mother church.
Year: 1870

Tho Pneumatic Transit Company Litigation
Application for an Injunction Against the
Burrowers-The Rabbits Show Battle
Arguments Of Counsel Upon the


Rights Of this City and the


Power Of the Legislature.
Year: 1870

Mutunls VS.. Haymakers-Victory for the


Former by Score Of 12 to 8.


The Haymakers or Troy and the Mutuals Of this
city played their home and home game yesterday on
the Union grounds About 5000 people were present
The game was not as good as many expected to see,
although there were few very fine individual plays
The result should have been three to nothing in
favor OF the "Mutes" instead OF twelve to nine as
the Haymakers dld not earn run during the entire
game. Below fs the scOre.-
Year: 1870




Under this head the Zanes>
vile City Times has the follow.
ing: "There are always a few
subscribers to every county
paper who pay promptly for
the same, but who get to read
it but little, on account Of a
pheasant neighbor" who Dor,
rows it regularly every week.
This indicates the popularity
Of county papers, butit don't
assist them any. If this class
of subscribers will just take
the liberty (and every publish.
er will authorize them to, J TO
borrow the mans best coat or
boots and wear them while he
reads the paper, they'll soon
break it up. You have just as
much right to do it, and he is a
very selfish man that would
complain at this act of recip,
rocity. Prominent business
men who are able to buy two
or three of the best offices in
the city, practice this thing
from mouth to month and year
to year, and drop the paper
rejoiced at The prospect of q
rise in their property, or an in,
crease of business; but ask
them to help sustain the paper
that makes their property val
liable, and their business good
and they'll tell you they "ge
to read it every week withou
paying anything for it." Theil
poor, little souls have dried up
they've sponged so long, ant
the best they can do towarG
sustaining a business that, O
necessity, aids everybody is, tc
read the paper that somebody
else pays for. Reader, if yol
are one Of the class that d.
this thing, go and look at your
self in the glass, and, repea
the words. 81 read my count,
paper and my neighbor pay
for it" and l will venture tina
you'll look SO SIN all in you
own estimation that you will
go instantly to a tailor and or
der two yards less than tn,
usual amount of cloth to maxi
| yourself q coat"
Year: 1870

THE Boston Transcript says
at was once said Of a Boston
money lender that he kept the
trunk containing his securities
near the head of his bed, and
lay awake to hear them draw,
interest" j. 90 on. o,
Year: 1870

AS good a financial platform
as a man need have, is the off,
cial statement of the public
debt under a Republican ad.
ministration. Here are the
monthly reductions since Gen.
Grant went into office:
Year: 1870

The New York Herald re.


marks upon the steady reduc-


ton of the debt, every month,
since the Inauguration of Pres.
ident Grant: nDoes the Ad.
ministration need any more
convincing campaign docu~
ments than such monthly bull
letinss They indicate honesty;
for paying debts according to
the accepted maxim is the
most trying test of honesty
They indicate economy and re-
trenchment; for without these
with the heavy load of expendi-
lures that the government is
compelled to make every day,
strict economy and searching
retrenchment would alone ad'
NIT of the payment of a dol
lar of the debt. They indicate
the enforcement of the laws;
for the revenue laws are the
most difficult to enforce, and
Oh the collection of the reye.
nue. depends our only chance
of paying our current expenses
or our debts. There, then, we
have honesty, economy and
the enforcement of the laws
for the platform of General
Grants Administration laid
down ip letters of living light
Year: 1870

From tie Toledo Blade.


The Fifteenth Amendment-The
Democracy Of the Sixth Ward Meet
in the Back Room of the "Harp Nv
Erin S'Ioon" to consider what to do
in the Ms tier Of tho Negro Vote
The Come to a Decision.