smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1871

Mr.. Greeley's wrote an editorial
in which the sentence "Erin go
Bragh" occurred twice. One com.
positor set it up, "Eris yer dough,
and another set it, " Indi go blue
Horace was so mad that he kicked
himself down two pair of stairs.
The other day the front door of the
New York Tribune Office had to be
closed for some purpose. So Hor.
ace wrote ON a piece of paper: " En-.
trance ON Spruce street," and sent
it down to the man who does the
painting of the bulletins to be cop
led. The man studied over Horace's
tracts all the forenoon, and finally,
in despair wrote, Editors on a
Spree and posted it up. The pas
sers-by thought the circumstance
was not unusual, but wondered why
it should be posted up so conspicu-
ously.


A man once wrote to Horace
Greely for a situation, and received
the following letter in Horace's
handwriting : This is the 20O0th
application in a week. Go to the
devil. I can't hire every id fool"
The man presented it to the cashier,
who looked it over and handed the
man $40, supposing it to be an order
for his salary and he has been drawing G
his salary ON that letter regularly
for six months. What a warning
this is to the youth of the country
to lean to write.


~S-~~~~-atbs-~~~~-~~~


Baron Gustavus Won Nathan, the
chamberlain of the King of Prussia,
committed suicide under most sin
gular circumstances at Berlin a few
weeks ago. The Baron had run in
to debt so heavily that utter ruin
stared him in the face, and so he in
vited all his creditors to meet at a
certain hour at a place in the
neighborhood of the palace, when
he would settle with them. When
they arrived there they found an
elegant dinner ready for them, the
Baron acting as host. He was live
ly and witty in the extreme, and
the guests were in the best possible
humor, when the Baron suddenly
rose and asked to be excused for a
minute. He stepped into an adj
joining room and directly afterwards
shot was heard. The guests
rushed in and found the Baron ly-
ing on the floor with his brains blown
out; this was the only j" settlement !"
he made.
Year: 1871

"No, my DEAR" said mother to
her daughter, who had been taking
nap before dressing for the eve
ming party, you needn't rearrange
your hair; you couldn't make it look
more scrambled if YOU tried.n
Year: 1871

With the promise of contributing
my mite of knowledge on some of
the subjects embraced in your role,
and as there is nothing better calcu-
lated to promise a free and cordial
interchange ofideas among planters
than knowledge Of the real name
OF correspondents, subscribe my
Year: 1871

MINES, CANALS, ETc.-A correspondent writing
70 the Scientific Press from this county says


"On Iowa Hill are located some of the richest
gravel deposits in the State; but the scanty sup
ply of water prevents successful operations; still,
some extensive projects are in contemplation and
the prospects never were better for having in
speedy operation number of canals, which will
supply naturally well-favored country abund-
antly. Preliminary surveys have been made
upon several of the most practicable routes from
Lake Tahoe down, though none are yet decided
upon; also for other canals of lesser Importance
to be filled from the various branches OF the
American river All of these undertakings must
prove profitable and their completion will be
heralded with joy, as they alone can develop this
country-whieh is rich in mineral, with a soil
capable of raising all the agricultural products
could it be irrigated.


At Dutch Flat some of the heaviest hydraulic
mining in the country has been done and an
enormous extent of ground has yet to be worked
profitably with the well regulated facilities they
have at command, and their only drawback just
is a scarcity of water, cement mill has
just been erected by Messrs. Cox and Brown.
They are using one of Cox's patent cement
washers, which is working admirably, and Will
undoubtedly prove successful invention.
Year: 1871

In Finding Ones Occupation Gone"
intended apparently to show the impossl-
bility of man actually retiring from all
work, is the following -" The hankering
after old occupations is everywhere to be
met with after the occupations gone
"Mr. DICKENS, on his homeward
passage from America, had for one OF his
fellow passengers an English sailor, a
smart, thorough built man-of-war's man
from his hat to his shoes, who was on his
way home to see his friends, and who,
when he presented himself to take and
pay for his passage, had been advised to
work it instead and save the moneys
suggestion he secuted with scorn ineffsble,
swearing, in seaman's style ofimprecation,
that nothing should hinder his going as a
gentleman. So they took his money. But
no sooner was he aboard than he slowed
his kit in the forcastle, arranged to mess
with the crew, and the very first time the
hands werG turned up, he went aloft like
cat before any body. And all through the
passage there he was, first at the braces,
outermost on the yards, perpetually lend
ing hand everywhere, but always with a
sober dignity in his manner, and a sober
grin on his face, which plainly said, dc
It as a gentleman. For my own pleasure
mind you
Year: 1871

A NEW YORK wholesale grocer who has
become rich in his business, lately gave
one of his fundamental rules of action.
When he sold bill of goods on credit it
was his custom to Immediately subscribe
for the local paper of his debtor. So long
as his customer advertised literally and
vigorously he rested, but as soon as he be-
gan to contract his advertising space he
took the fact as evidence that there was
trouble ahead, and he invariably went for
his debt. "For," said he, "the man who
feels too poor to make his business known
is too poor to do business" This with
drawal of an advertisement is an evidence
of weakness that business men are not
slow to observe
Year: 1871

UNCLE CALEB and Ruth, his wife,


Caring little for outside weather,
Fifty years of their welded life


Spent In this tiny house together.
Messy the roof and gray the wall,


Narrow the window, low the door;
But loves own sunlight hallOwed 1t all,
From raftered ceiling to sanded floor.
Silent to-day; but silver sweet


Voices of children long ago,
Keeping time with their restless feet,


Followed the mother to and fro.
Scattered afar from East to West,


Seeking their fortunes far and wide;
No one stays in the olden nest,


Where such beautiful memories hide.
Caring naught for the the desolate pain
OF the wind in the pine tree tops,
Caring naught for the grieving rain
That SO sadly over them drops.
Heeding as little the sunbeam's kiss,
Falling sweet from the summer sky,
In narrower house than this


Caleb and Ruth together lie.
Up where the many mansions wait,


Is there, wonder, a cottage small
Not too stately its pearly gate,


Not too shining its golden wall
Where these two may in peace abides
Heaven were none If these must part
Caleb away from her gentle side.


Ruth afar from his faithful hearth
Hand In hand from morning to night
Travelled these two the long earth-day;
Surely they walk through the fields of light,
Hand in hand on the shining way.
Year: 1871

NG- Out West they tell story of dog which
was greatly interested in music. He attended
a singing school, and was subsequently found
in the back yard with music book in front
of him, beating time with his tail on tin pan.
and bowling "Old Hundred"
Year: 1871

Gs~ country editors sole editorial in
one weeks issue of his paper was to the effect
that if anything will make man feel juicy
about the heart, it is to talk velvet to a pair
of sky-colored eyes, by moonlight, in clover
field
Year: 1871

Va In America, at this very moment, there
are perhaps ten thousand men, still young, whose
strength and hope have gone and left behind only
an endless regret that nothing had been laid'up
in the time of plenty for just such an emergency.
And perhaps there are ten thousand more who
are unconsciousy travelling along the same road ;
and who at the end of the next five years, will
suffer the same calamity, and become the prey OF
the same regrets. And every five years, as they
roll away, write just such sad history OF ten
thousand souls.-ReU. Geo. II. Mspsoorh.
Year: 1871

SIT MIGHT HAVE BEEN I've hear great deal
about the phrase, cit might have been"


Sentimental youths and love born lasses,
growing old bachelors and "pcky" old spin
sters, all join in this contemplate whine, 'It
might have been p but the words have another
meaning well worth looking for, too.


Instead of mourning over the irretrievable
past, and signing "It might have been better, 4"
we should do far more sensible thing if we pick
ed up crumbs, and said, 'It might have been
acorse"


Taking time through, there isn't more cause
for sorrow than joy, and all bitter complaining
only brings us so much the more speedily to the
place which is the quintessence of everything
doleful


1t is not very likely that any of us will be call
ed to endure more than good old Job. When
earthly blessings were taken from him he did not
raise great hue and cry, but patiently said,
"The Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away,
blessed be the name Of the Lord"


If ever we so happy as to get to Heaven,
then we may see that much which we call trouble
and sorrow now, are really our greatest bless
ings and our utter ruin might have been as We
often blndly wished they might have been.


Then shall we see that of all glad words of
tongue or pen, the gladdest are these, SIT might
have been :"
Year: 1871

in all cases of the hillary system. Hoohand's
German Bitters stand without an equal, acting
promptly and vigorously upon the Liver they
remove its torpidity and cause healthful secre-
ton of bile-thereby supplying the stomach
with the most indispensable elements Of sound
digestion in proper proportions. They give
tone to the stomach stimulating its functions,
and enabling it to perform its duties as nature
designed it should do. They impart vigor
and strength to the entire system, causing the
patient to feel like another being-in fact, Civ
inc him q new lease of life.
Year: 1871

Almost the first thing boys do when
they begin to drive horse is to ply
the whip. If horse is little uneasy,
they will lash him. If he is afraid Of
any object, they put on the whip. II
be slips for want Of being well shod, he
gets a severe cut with the whip. Ii he
happens to stumble, or to make mis-
sep, The whip is applied with vcngeanc, :.
Prof Magner, in his treatise on the edu.
cation OF horses, cautions those who
drive horses, against exciting their i'll
will by the use Of the whip.


Many think they are doing finely, and
are proud OF their success in horse train
ing, by means of whipping, or otherwise
rousing and stimulating the pass on {,
and then from necessity crushing the
will Of the animal through which the
resistance is prompted. No mistake can
be greater than this and there is roth
ing that so fully exhibits the ability,
Judgment, and skill of the real horse M an,
as the care and tact displayed in vii ming
instead ot rep.lling the spirited b, asst
Although it may be necessary to use the
" hip sometimes, it should always be ap-
piled judiciously. The legitimate ID
proper use of the whip is calculated to
operate upon the sense of fear almost
entirely. Sensitive horses should never
be LETT after they have been excited by
the whip or other means, nntil calmed
down by rubbing or patiing the head
aud neck, and giving apples, sugar, or
something Of which the animal is fond.
Remember the whip must he used with
great care, or it is liable t. do mischief,
and may cause irreparable injury.


When horse is struck with a whip,
the driver should first understand for
what reason the whip is applied, and
what the effect will be on the horse.
Ninety-nine lashes out of one hundred
that spirited horses receive, do infinitely
more harm and injury to the animal than
good. Before horse is touched with a
whip the driver should enable the beast
to understand ,chy the lash is applied.
When an ll-natured driver whips his
team simply because he feels out of
humor. aud must wreak his vengeance
On something, dumb animals that are
abused by him know that they are lashed
without cause. Hence a few cas,iga-
tions will often render them exceedingly
ugly.
Year: 1871

When you see ragged urchin


Standing wistful in the street,
With torn hat and kneeless trowsers,
Dirty face and red bare feet,
Pass not by the CHILD unheeding
Smile upon him. Mark me, when
He's grown he'll never forget it;


For, remember, boys make men.
When the buoyant youthful spirits
Overflow in hoyish freak,
Chide your child in gentle accents
Do not in your anger speak
You must SOW in youthful blossoms
Seeds of tender mercy then
Plants will grow and bear good fruitage
When the erring boys are men.
Have you never seen grandsire,


With his eyes aglOw with joy,
Bring TO mind some act of kindness
Something said to him, boys
Or relate some slight or coldness,


" 18th brow rs clouded, when
He said they were too thnughiless


To remember boys made men.
Let us try to add some pleasure


To the life Of every boy
For each child needs tender interest


In lis sorrow and its joy
Call your bows home by its brightness
They avoid II gloomy den,
And seek for comfort el,ewlere


And remember, boys make men.
Year: 1871

a PALACE SLEEPING CAR Blown UP.-
"A Pullman palace sleeping car was
blown up while standing on the track at
the west end Of the Central Railroad
depot in Depot, about five O'Clock, P. NJ,
Friday. The Free Press gives the par.
ticulars thus:


"The Crescent like all cars Of the
kind, is heated by steam, there being q
furnace and boiler situated in the centre
OF the car. About half-past four O'Clock
the conductor of the car, which was to
run out on the evening train, went in,
saw that the boiler was in order and
then started fire, stretching himself
cut on the cushions after he had done so.
Whether there was lack OF water in
the boiler, or whether it generated more
steam than it could bear, is not known,
but II suddenly exploded. The boiler
was blown through the root of the car,
shvering the timbers and ceiling for a
distance each way. Portions of the
sides OF the car were blown out, and the
conductor was pitched out on to the
gravel SO hurriedly that he had no time
tor inquiries. Hot water was thrown
every where, enough striking the man to
make him feel lively for halt au hour,
and the bed clothing and cushions were
considerably Injured by both water and
the fragments of the boiler. A piece of
the boiler went through the side OF the
car close to the conductors head. The
damage 10 the coach will reach several
hundred dollars.
Year: 1871

Very considerable excitement is main.
tanned in England over Disraei's allusion
to the health of the Queen, and i. is sald
the London journals are divided as to
the policy of publishing his assertions
as to her moral and physical condition,
some suppreSsing the speech and others
giving conspicuous reports of it. The
Queen is said to be insane, and the con-
dIion Of her general health very bad,
her system being tainted with scrofula.
A letter states that for years past she
has believed that the soul OF Prince
Albert is invariably y present with her,
and that she can hold communion with
him. So impressed is she with this
pathetic belief that she will frequently,
it is said, order knife and fork to be
laid for him at her table, AN cause the
attendant ioctman to place every course
before the empty chair as if their master
still occupied it. Every morning a pair
Of boots are cleaned and set down at
the door of the room formerly tenanted
by Prince Albert, and by innumerable
other signs the widowed Queen testifies
to her faith in her dead husbands actual
presence on earth. Prince Albert, it 10
well known, WAS free thinker, and
there is little doubt that the Queen was
during his lifetime made well acquainted
with many Of the bold and ingenious,
but somewhat mystical, theories of GER
tain German philosophers in relation to
the future state of the soul.


The people are evidently very restive
under the the idea of Prince Albert ever
succeeding to the throne. He has all
the faults and failings of the most OF
the Georges. His intellectual caliber is
very light, his tastes low, his associa-
tions bad, and his habits detestable. The
Chicago Times correctly sums him up as
follows: "Where this sprig of royalty
ever acquired his present low tastes and
abomlnabfe habits is a matter which the
Rterati, scientists, heroes and statesmen
of his mothers time have vainly endeav-
ored to determine. A recreant alike to
the memory OF virtuous father, and
the heart-pangs of widowed mother ;
false to noble wife, aud contemptuous
of the opinion of an outraged nation,
this princely Micawber is loafing about
waiting for something to turn up that
something meaning to him a crown. He
is filing himself for the duties of a
throne by dancing attendance upon Lon.
don brothels; is preparing to do his
share advancing the interests of England
by courting the attention of cockney
cads and third-rate Anonymas, and is
fitting himself for the advanced views OF
the Nineteenth century by mixing in
pothouse broils and danee-dive orgies.'
Year: 1871

OLD MAIDs.-A quaint and gallant
writer of some fifteen years ago, says
81 love an old maid-1 do net speak of
an individual, but of the species-I use
the singular number, as speaking of a
singularity in humanity. An old maid


is not merely antiquarian, she is an anti
qnity not merely record of the past,
but the very past itself she has escaped


great change, and sympathizes not in
the ordinary mutations ofmortality. She


inhabils little eternity Of her own.
She is Miss from the beginning of the
chapter to the end. do not like to
hear them called Mistress, as is some
times the practice, for that looks and
sounds like the resignation of despair,
voluntary extinction of hope. | do
not know whether marriages are made
in heaven some people say they are,
but am almost sure old maids are.
There is something about them which is
not OF the earth, earthly. They are spec
tators of the world, not ad,enturers nul
ramblers-perhaps guardians we say
nothing OF tattlers. They are evidently
predestinated To be what they are. They
owe not the singularity of their condi


tion to any lack of beauty, wisdom, wit
or good temper there is no accounting
for it but on the principle of fatality. |
have known many old maids, and OF
them all, not one that has not possessed
as many good and amiable qualities as
ninety and nine out of hundred of my
married acquaintences Why, then, are
they single II is their fate ! Nonsense.
Year: 1871

The New York Herald, in view of the
recent developments in thatcity, wants he
missionaries to "let the heather slide for
the present, and attend TO the home
trade in social decentralization and gen
eral wickedness. Scarcely one crime or
one horror is announced ere it is 'tele-
scoped' by another, and so it goes on
from one day TO another, without end to
the chapter.
Year: 1871

vet greater waste and more aggravating an
noyance in traversing the average three miles
that separate their work from their homes.
In what should be the very focus OF
the labor saving health-saving, and time
saving appliances Of our highest civilization,
we are helpless before tho simplest engineer
ing difficulties, and reduced to primitive means
of transit that make the New York City workman
to-day actually worse off, in spite of our boasted
progress in tho arts of life, than his grand
parents were, q hundred years ago or his
remOter ancestors under the paternal rule OF
Peter Stuyvesant. New-York cannot afford
this, and will not endure it. In some way or
another she must have rapid transit for her
residents from shop or Office to home, and that
right speedily.


An occasional correspondent appeals to US
to "sh0w up" the cOrruptiOns lurking in the
Arcade project. To what end We have no
hope of gathering grapes from the Albany
thistles. From the day that strict partisan
vote denied to Mr.. Twombly the seat to which
every Democrat in the Legislature knew he
was as fairly and legally elected as any one of
themselves, for the sole purpose of securing a
partisan majority, We knew that the
needs must be desperate that could
prompt such desperate work. 1t is no
news that the Tammany leaders want i'm
mense sums of money for the next Presiden-
tial election, and expect to make them out of
legislative jobs 1t is no news that every bill
in any way affecting real estate in this city or
Westchester County brings toll to the mill
of Tweed and Sweeny. What thenf
Shall we strive to prevent them from
giving us tho rapid transit we
must have, because they may, in doing it, Sc
cure the corrupt gains we know they are
going to make anyhowf Possibly it is true,
as one or two correspondents charge, that the
purpose is to make tho City build the road
while the corporators pocket the profits !;
undoubtedly the Ring will make enor-
mously in real estate operations along
the line of the road; beyond question it is
most unfortunate that we should be forced to
trust men like these with the disbursement of
great sums of money, and the issue of dam
gerOus quantities of bonds, while we
can get no satisfactory statement of
our present alarmingy mysterious city
finances. But beggars must not be
choOsers ;-and zoe rant and must hare the road.
Whatever corruptions We may be able to dis
cover in its construction we shal endeavor
faithfully to expose; but we shall not try to
prevent o great public improvement impera-
lively demanded by the highest public con-
sideratiOns, because of suspected corruptions,
which, even if discovered, we should be help
less, before this Legislature, to correct or
avert.
Year: 1871

We are suffering from an embarrassment or
legislative riches. We asked for bill under
which We could certainly get rapid steam
transit from the City Hall to the Harlem
River; and the Legislature showers upon us
O Pneumatic Tunnel bill, and an Arcade bill,
while the Greenwich-st Elevated Road an
nounces that it is again on the verge OF sue
cess, and asks for little moro time wherein
to prove it.


Hereupon confused clamor arises. The
Governor and the public press are beset in
turn by the advocates Of each measure and
the opponents Of all. We are entreated to
oppose the Pneumatic bill because it will
destroy Broadway; to oppose the Arcade bill,
because it is one enormous and reeking mass
of corruption; to demand the demolition of
the Elevated Road because it is at once a
nuisance and hopeless failure.


We propose to do none of these things. We
are not clear about the superiority of the
Pneumatic plan, but its Broadway opponents
have played dog-in -the-manger to three
quarters of million of daily delayed, aggra-
waited, and seriously injured people too long
to meet with much support now. We have
little doubt that there are jobs, and jobs
within jobs, in the Arcade project; but we have
vet to learn how any needed legislation
is to be got from this Legislature that shall
be without them. We have not been hopeful
of the Elevated project; but there are points
in its favor, and if the men who have put
their money in 1t are willing to spend more
in the hope of making it success, it Is not
40 much in the way but that we can well
afford to let it stand long enough to give
them the amplest opportunity for experiment
and Improvement.


The one great, central fact about this whole
business is that New-York desperately wants,
must have and will have. rapid transit
throughout the length of the island. Our
present condition Ia one OF barbarlsm' The
working representatives of half to three
quarters of O million Of our popula-
ton daily food in one choked, angry
tide every avenue of access to the
lower end Of the island, and after waste of
from half an hour to an hour and half TO
each individual in the morning, suffer at night