smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1878

Nobody counts up the people that die
out of parties who sit down seven at table.
or eleven, or twelve, or nineteen, but IL
anyone should do it, in any given year,
the chances are that quite strong case
could be made out for any or all of these
figures as connected with the death rates.
Ii IS only when thirteen people find them
selves together at a meal that the old su-
perstition is mentioned, and then, if the
year goes over without any of the party
dropping out Of life, nobody thinks 10
mention that at the close. 1t is quite GER
tain that people are not protected against
disease or accident by the circumstance
that twelve knives and forks are on duty
around them while they cut up their own
meat and bread; if it were 50, indeed, then
all well-disposed neighbors might club to-
gether to take their meals in the assorted
numbers that defy the doctor and the
apothecary. But if there cannot well be
any life-insurance upon thirteen people
that put them for a twelvemonth into q
charmed existence, let them overhead,
overwork, overeat themselves with impu-
nifty, kindle fires with petroleum, or 90
without fire and food, it is equally evident
that neither can there be any safety in
ten, or in five, or in fifteen. IF the count
were kept against any given number, it
would not be long before it would fall into
very bad repute, and mig ght be made an
swerable not alone for people dying, but
for rob bing bank or forging election re-
turns. There is nothing at once so valua-
bic, and so open to abuse, as the handling
of statistics, and it is a wonder that NO
prophet has arisen up to count in what
choice numbers rogues, defauding cash
iers, assassins, and other death-dealing
gentry sit down to table.
Year: 1878

1t is evident that if the piano is to re-
main in good order for many years, good
care must be taken of it. The instrument
should be closed when not in use, in order
to prevent the collection of dust, pins &C.,
&C., on the sound board. However, it
must not be left closed for a period of
several months or longer, but be opened
occasionally, and daylight allowed to strike
the keys, or else the ivory may turn yell
low. Any hard substance, no matter how
small, dropped inside the piano, will cause
a rattling, jarring noise. 1t is in every
case desirable that an Indiarubber or cloth
cover should protect the instrument from
bruises and scratches. The piano should
not be placed in damp room, or left
open In draft of air. Dampness is its
most dangerous enemy, causing the strings
and turning-pins to rust, the cloth used in
the construction of the keys and action to
swell, whereby the mechanism will move
sluggishly, or often stick altogether. This
occurs chiefly in the summer season; and
the best pianos, made of the most thor
oughlyseasoned material, are necessarily
affected by dampness, the absorption being
rapid. Extreme heat is scarcely less in
furious. The piano should not be placed
very near to an open fire or a heated stove,
nor over or close to the hot-air furnaces
now in general use Moths are very de-
structive to the cloth and felt used in the
pianos, and may be kept out of it by plac-
ing lump of camphor, wrapped in soft
paper, in the inside corner, care being
taken to renew it from time to time.
Many persons are unaware of the great
Importance of having their pianos kept in
order, and only turned by a competent
tuner. A new piano should be tuned at
least once every three or four months du-
ring the first year, and at longer intervals
afterward.
Year: 1878

DIFFERENT WAYS OF PUTTING IT.
This is a scientific way:-"f a man falls
asleep in the sitting posture, with his
mouth open, his jaw drops; the tongue not
being in contact with the hard palate, the
suctorial space is obliterated, the soft pa
late no longer adheres to the roof of the
tongue, and, if respiration be carried on
through the mouth, the muscular curtain
begins to vibrate." And this is the popu-
lar form eff a man doesn't keep his
mouth shut when asleep, he will snore."
Year: 1878

One thousand shingles, says a newspa-
per paragraph, will cover one hundred
square feet of surface. One shingle, by
the way, will cover six square inches of
bad boy, and, if properly applied, will be
productive of as much benefit and more
noise than the one thousand shingles on
one hundred square feet of surface.
Year: 1878

ScHooI. TEACHING. What is the
use of q teacher il he or she docs
not teach I This is a question that
is sgitatiug goo d many Of onr ex'
changes. A Virginia paper thinks
that to send children home in the
evening with arms full OF books and
half q dozen lessons to get out by
themselves, and then in tho morn
ing to hear their 'recitations' and
score their demerits, is no teach
ing at all. Tho pupil should bs
taught how to study and how to
think and this ought to be done
in the school room. and not at
home, where parents have a. much
as they can do to attend to the do


nestic matters and hear their chill :
drsn recite what they have been
taught by their tsschers. IL hear
ing recitations is all q teacher has
to do then lie is no teacher. but
merely q judge Of the childs home
requirements. Another paper says
III teachers are paid to teach, they
should not, in our opinion, be allow
ed to omit more than half their duty
by continiug theTsel yes solely TO
the work OF recitation. - Washington


San.
Year: 1878

INSTRUCTIONS TO THE MARINE HOSPITAL SER
VICE.


The following directions TO the medical officers Of


the Marine Hospital service have just been issucd:-
OFFICE SURGEON GENERAL
MARINE HOSPITAL SERVICE,
Year: 1878

LIFE AND FAITH.


sonnets by George Mcknight 81. lGmO, 81 90.
This may DO considered second edition. with amend
aud additions OF a volume published about
year ago by the author himself the title OF Firm
GrOundw OF that volume The Nation said:


~ book to which turn with hearty pleasure T.
book rich In thought His thoughts absolutely his
worked many Of the ardes problems age
and always with sweetness and candOr that win love
while his bold touches often carry to the very heart Of
thought though with perpetual tendency the larger
hopeful view and sometimes there really fine
lima ginatiye touches"
Year: 1878

RESEARCHES on THE TEMPERATURE OF TIE
HEAD.-In n communication to the Royal Society on
experimental researches to the temperature Of


the head the author Dr. svombard shows that men al


activity will at raise such temperature, ana that
merely to excite the attention has the effect In
loss degree. This Is certainly curious result as ap-
pearng 10 show that anything OF the nature OF goien
involves waste Of nerve-tissus which Is not involved
In involuntary perception and observaOn. There Ia NO
Year: 1878

The editor of backwoods paper is reported to have discovered New Testament on his desk the other day. He at once wrote an elaborate review of it, and was very much dis appointed when the foreman brought his copy back and told him it was new book
Year: 1878

There !, nothing like medical knowl-
edge. v hen one sees man whose toes
have taken a sudden notion to double
up and the sole of the foot turn inward,
and is told that the man had "some-
thing the matter with his head about
five years ago, and has never been quite
well since," one does not quite under
stand; but when the doctor beams in
and says that the unfortunate has had
cerebral hemorrhage, and that the cor
pus stratum, optic thalamus, choroid
plexus, or'septum lucidum has been in
volved, or that probably lesion in
some other part of the brain has been
formed, and that in consequence there
is a secondary degeneration of the spinal
cord, and that the cause of the toes be


ing fixed and the foot being turned in
ward is contraction of the fleXor
longus digitorum and the tibialis posti-
Gus, the whole thing is perfectly plain.
Year: 1878

A short horse is soon curried, but
mule, short or long, will kick you into
the next township.-OR city Derrick.
We have known many man to sit
around waiting for something to turn up
until that something was his toes
Whitehall Times.


The young man who won't defy
earache, toothache, neuralgia and cold
in the head to hang over the gate with
his girl would make a carping, fault
finding husband.-Free Press.


The paragraphist of the New York
Commercial Adrertiser has written a
song entitled, " Hug Me to Death, Dar-
ling" 1t is intended for duet, and no
audience.


Nature in her own person some-
times supplies many of the finest pro
ductions of art and civilization. Thus
we have the bread-tree and other such,
too numerous to mention. But the only
natural butter so far found is the goat.
Darwin, in explaining the operation
of the principle of imitation in natural
selection, has not considered the proba-
bility of the theory that the donkey got
its singular voice from listening to a
glee club serenading Il young lady at
midnight.


The most absent-minded man was
not the man who hunted for his pipe
when he had it between his teeth, nor
the one who threw his hat out of the
window and tried to hang his cigar on a
peg; no, but the man who put his UNI
brella to bed and went and stood up be-
hind the door.-RocheSter Express.


When you can not go to sleep a
good way to summon Morpheus is to
obtain Webster's unabridged diction-
arv, and count all the words. Try it.
If at first you don't succeed, try, try
again. 1t is sure to bring on the de-
sired result in time, and all that is re-
quired is little patience.-N. 7. Dis
patch.


I We'd rather be a minister


man who never laughs;


Than sit all day upon n stool


And write these paragraphs


There's one thing then, we'd always do


At home or when away;


No matter If the times were dull


We'd always draw our pay.


That's the way tlrstcla minister
do. EJnirG Gazette.
Year: 1878

At the last session Congress passed bill
advancing to Captain Eads the money ap-
propriated to pay him for his jetty works on
the Mississippi, which, according to the
original bill, was not due until the compile
tion of the contract; but before it was paid
some of Captain Eads's creditors claimed
that it should be paid to them to satisfy old
Indebtedness. The matter was referred to
the Attorney General, who has decided that
Year: 1878

1t is given out that ladies will wear
vests precisely like the gentlemen's this
winter. When married man goes to
bed he will have to put a chalk mark ON
his vest, or next morning he may slip
on his wife's and not discover his mis-
take until he inserts his thumb and fore
finger in the right-hand pocket for
pinch of fine-cut and finds nothing but a
piece of chewing gum and the stub OF a
Short black lead pencil. Then he Will
suddenly remember that there was rol!
of ten-dollar greenbacks in the left-hand
pocket of his vest-that is if he is an
editor, he willard he will rush back
home in Rarus time NorristoUn Her.
aid
Year: 1878

New York Sept. 25.-The
London Whitehall Review
Just received, abiding to the
Princess Alice calamity, says: :
it is simply incredible that
out Of some 500 people who
were suddenly submerged not
a dozen should have saved
their lives by swimming, and 1t
is equally remarkable that of
those few none were actually
under the water a second. 1t
is more than evident that a
very large number Of persons
able to swim succumbcd. The
blame therefore rests not only
with the Princess Alice and
the Bywell Castle, but with
those who have rendered the
waters OF the crowded Tha-
mes absolutely deadly.


In plain English, and 1t Is
impossible 10 be too positive
with the fact staring us IN the
face, the six hundred and odd
souls were poisoned. The enS
tire sewerage Of the 1netropo-
lis is discharged into the river
at Barking creek in a raw
condition, converting thereby
the stream into a common
sewer. Now. the immediate
effect of plunging a human
beng into sewerage is stuplh"
cation and asphyXls.
Year: 1878

Our sanctum is made fragrant by
the aroma of an exqusitely beauti-
full but very rare flower from the
garden of Mr.. Morenhout, the
French Consul. 1t is called the
Paradise Plant and is indigenous to
the PHILIPPINE Islands. The fiow-
ers grow out from a series Of little
sofGp. 9Jyhlds. and the whole is a
over it in a graceful spray. As a
background there are two enormous
green leaves which in the hue
though not in ahape resemble those
of the lily, being not SO wide and
curling more. The flowers them
selves are of delicate straw color,
with petal of deeper colored
yellow capped by green ball half
the size of pin head. 1t is aston
ishing the strength and delicacy of
the aroma diff'used by this flower,
one being amply sufficient to per-
fume whole room. We beg to
return our hearty thanks to the
donor, and are pleased to know that
such charming member of the
floral family can he dom esticated
in Los Angeles.
Year: 1878

The Eureka Sentinel tells about
the newest style Of shoes among
the "Ladies, God bless themW OF
the ShoshOne tribe: They hang
around the slaughter.houses, and
when the beef is skinned they
fasten to the hide which covers the
gambrel joint, cut the skin across,
a foot below and foot above; sew
one end up; put the foot in, with
the heelHin the turn made by the
elbow, and stand in the sun until it
dries to the shape of the hoof.
Year: 1878

No wonder they have a plague at
New Orleans. The Times, of that
city, says that four thousand loads
of kitchen garbage, which had been
hauled to the dumping-gr grounds by
the city carts, have been brought
back by the contractors and used to
fill up streets in the front part OF
the city. This is said to have hap
pened within the present year, and
was in progress at the time of the
breaking out of the fever.
Year: 1878

The facilities OF the HERALD Steam
Printing House for doing job work are not
surpassed in California outside Of san
Francisco and Sacramento. All work en-
trusted to us will be executed with neat
ness and dispatch at the lowest living
Year: 1878

GENERAL MERRITT, the collector pro TEN


for the port OF New York-for he will GER
tainly he rejected by the Senate next De-
comber-is gentl, man Of fine abilities and
unexceptionable personal habits But he
starts out in his new official career with the
declaration that none OF his subordinates
will be permitted to participate in political
affairs in any active manner He is going
to muzzle them, in other words so that they
shall not say or do anything to secure the
reelection of Senator CoNKLING. This was
the main object and the sole inspiration OF
the Administration in selecting him to sue
ceed Collector ARTHUR. But Mr.. COSK-
LING will be reelected nevertheless, with
or without the aid Of few hundred men
about the custom house. When President
of the United States descends to such paltry
manuuvres US the manipulation Of custom
house patronage against fellow-partisan-
save the mark-he simply excites DISCUS,
for himself and his acts, and incites sympa.
thy for the person he attempts to persecute
Year: 1878

THAT immaculate civil-scrvice reformer
and colossal migrate, Ben BRIsrow, has been
heard from again. lie hopes that General
GRANT will be patriotic enough to decline
the nomination for the Presidency If it
should be rendered to him. Would BRIs-
row be sopatriotic as to accept such nomi-
nation, if it were rendered TO him over the
ruined regulations of men who raised him
from obscurity to imbecile importance
We are afraid he would but neither he nor
any of his ilk will ever have the oppor-
tunity
Year: 1878

THE New York custom-house appoint
ments arc very generally characterized by
the press as a surprise. 1t would have been
more surprising if the Administration had
strictly observed the demands of true civil
service reform and permitted competent
officers like Messrs. Arthur and CORNELL
to remain in Office
Year: 1878

SECRETARY SHERMAN at Long Branch
Thursday night declared that the removals
OF Collector ARTHUR and Surveyor CORNELL
had been decided upon with the full con-
currence of the entire Cabinet and after due
Cabinet consultation. Cabinet officers in
Washington yesterday declared that the re-
movals took them by surprise, and that they
had no idea of them until after they were
made. Secretary EvARrs was not among
these uniniormed ministers.
Year: 1878

THE officer should be secure in his tenure
"of office said President HAYES in his let
ter of acceptance, "as long as his personal
character remained untarnished and the
performance of his duties satisfactory"
And he promised in the event of his election
10 conduct the Administration upon these
principles" and that "all constitutional
powers vested in the Executive will be en-
ITO establish this reform" A more pre-
tcntiOus falsehood than.the ons embraced
IN this promise was never uttered by any
sham-rciormor this country ever knew No
officer OF the civi! service is now secure in
Year: 1878

THE 'stand-pipc" now being erected at
the highest point Of Sixteenth street will
serve to throw water into the second stories
Of dwellings or other buildings on the
heights beyond Boundary street, Gas is al
ready carried beyond that point. In due
time that portion Of the city will he accom-
modated with all the so-caled modern con-
yeuicnces,
Year: 1878

WHILE President HAYES was looking
around for defenders OF his Title against the
assaults of the Groascrs he hid no occasion
to think that the New York custom-hous
needed cleaning out
Year: 1878

his tenure unless he is the avowcd opponent
of the critics of the Administration. Com
potency in the performance Of official duties
is construed by the Administration to be
synonym for loyalty TO its personal sur
roundings.
Year: 1878

peradoes generally preferred taking
meals off the mantel-piece for few
days after their return.


In the latest case of this kind how
ever, the work of this red fire literature
was more tragical. A tOw-headed high
wayman who had run away from home
and with some kindred spirits had for
some days been living in cave in the
surburbs, sailed forth from his hiding
place one night and meeting a young
man who resisted his demands for
money, backed up his claims by shoot
ing his victim dead. He was arrested,
tried and early last week was sentenced
to eight years in states prison. When
questioned by the judge as to the cause
of his crime he admitted that he had
been led to it by the current sensational
boys literature, but expressed no re-
gret and seemed to regard his convic-
ton and sentence merely as proper
and enjoyable part of the drama in
which he was the hero. RADIx.
Year: 1878

In his sermon Sunday morning, Mr..
Beecher referred to the death of the
poet Bryant, and said: "Among the
purest and best heathenism, exalted
and beautiful, is the "Thanatopsisn of
Mr.. Bryant. l will read it, not for the
benefit of those who know it by heart
already, but for those young persons to
whom it is not familliar.n- Beecher
then read "ThanatOpsis." When it was
finished he said: ga sweeter pagan
song was never sung. Let me supple
ment it now with Christian chant
and turning to the plymouth Collec-
tion," he read Watts's hymn beginning,
"Unveil thy bosom, faithful tomb.r
"Watts is better than Bryant" he said
at the close of the hymn. '.Listen now
to the Sacred Word in contrast with
this pagan song," and he read some
passages of Scripture bearing upon the
subject.


Speaking of this criticism of ethan
atopsis" the N. Y. Tribune remarks:


We think that there has been some
misapprehension of its purport and puI-
pose. The young writer, it seems to
us, did not propose to deal with the
strictly religious side of the matter.
His poem is what is called ga View of
Death" 1t addresses itself to those
whose fears may be excited by the
prospect of the act of dying. 1t offers
those consultations which are apprOpri-
ate to such a consideration of a partic-
ular theme. 1t is an expansion of the
old idea that sit is as natural to die as
to live" 1t deals with death as a
change pertinent to the human consti-
tuition, and to be encountered with
philosophical resignation. ANY distinct
recognition of the life to come would
have been foreign to its purpose. 1t
must be read with full recollection
that its author was believer in the
blessings and glOries of the future state.
though his immediate purpose was to
reassure those who regarded the end of
this life with unmanly timidity.


At the same time there is a sugges-
tlon of faith in the future which is an
essential part of the poem. The read
er is exhorted to live so wisely that
when his summons comes he may ap-
prOach the grave Sustained and sOoth-
ed by an unfaltering trust" There may
be those who find in these words only
an exhortatiOn to dignifed acquies-
cence in the inevitable but consider
ing that they were written by one who
had been trained in the principles of
Christianity, they were probably sug-
gested to his mind by the general be-
lief of mankind in Immortality.


'FThanatopsis" has been misunder-
stood because of its entire freedom from
hackneyd cOmmonplaces. Death is
most frequently treated by Christian
Year: 1878

A Pawletite recently came "across
the line" to Granville, to secure a sup
ply of whiskey, and purchased keg of
of it, leaving directions that it should
be shipped to him per express. 1t
would not do to have the keg enter
Vermont in it's nude state and with his
address on, so before the next train
arrived there was in the express office
harmless looking barrel of -four, ad-
dressed to a well known resident of
Pawlet. A member of the blue ribbon
fraternity happened along, and having
noticed not long since that similar
-four barrel had been shipped to the
same parsonage, became somewhat Gu
riOus. Flour is as cheap in Pawlet as
in Granville. Why so much express
charges should be incurred seemed in
deed singular. AS soon as nightfall
came, the temperance advocate thought
of good method to administer a tenn
perance lecture. An auger was pro-
cured, and getting directly under the
barrel, he commenced to bore. The
floor was first pierced. Then the barrel
side was perforated, when the sharp
pointed instrument rested in white
meal. But a little pushing further
upward brought the point in contact
with something hard. The investigator
chuckled, then began boring, and soon
there was left an empty keg, much
lighter flour barrel, and strong odor
of whiskey came from the ground. The
''fiour barrel" reached its destination,
but the tell-tale hole, the spilling meal
and unmistakable scent that accompa-
MED it, gave the recipient chance to
endure an occasional chuckle from the
village people, among whom the incl
dent soon became known.-IrOy Times.
Year: 1878

The Eureka Republican tells about
Mark Twain's lecture in Dayton, Ne
vada, some years ago. His agent used
to get up an excitement about the lee
ture by building bonfire before the
hall and sending fife and drum
through the streets half hour before
the beginning of the entertainment. He
did this in Dayton, then flourishing
camp, and the Piutes naturally got the
impression that some kind of an ex-
citing show was to be given, so the
chief tackled the enterprising agent on
the subject of half-price admissions, and
some 30 bucks paid their half dollars
and filed into the hall. Presently Mark
made his appearance on the stage and
began drawing away in his usual style
The white people laughed boisterously,
but the Indians looked puzzled, and
after standing it for Is minutes they
began whispering and grunting among
themselves, and finally the chief got up
and went out to the box office and in
quired when the tumbling was going to
commence, and that cheap big fOol'
was going to quit talking. Upon learn
ing that the performance was going to
be all talk, and conveyed this horrid
information to the other Indians, they
rose in body, left the hall and swarm
ed to the box Office and demanded their
money back. The agent couldn't think
of such thing, and the Piutes went out
on the street and gave vent to their
feelings in war-whoOps. 1t looked foI
a few minutes as if the disgusted war
riOrs would start in to wreck the hall
and murder the lecturer. A crowd OF
whites, attracted by the loud, angry
yells of the red men, gathered, how
i! ever, and Mark Twain was saved to an
| admiring world.