Year: 1878


ash-tubs and the cutters; in this
dire extremity he saw standing
open the door to rich mans man
sion, costly overcoat was just
within his reach, and to save him.
self from perishing he took it.
Justice stood appalled, at the mag
nitude of his ofense and we re-
joice to know that society was
avenged and the vagabond got his
deserts. Mr.. Turney, however,
fares better; it was only his init
mate friends whom he robbed
the men who had been the asso
ciates Of his life, and who had
trusted him with their fortunes for
over a quarter Of a century, and be-
side he only got hundred thou
! sand dollars-and he would have
put it back if he had not lost it
gambling; you can see at a glance
there is no comparison between the
crimes of these two men, and I am
therefore not surprised to learn
that he has been bailed out by in
fuential friends, his bail being
fixed at one tenth Of his defalcations
and that there is now a pleasing
probability that he may escape all
further inconvenience 7 sincerely
| hope so; I regret to see so worthy
man annoyed. # there is va
can't presidency Of an Insurance or
Trust company he may rest assured
of my recommendation, and I shall
find my reward in the contempla.
ton of the fact that though our
bank vaults may be endangered, at
least our overcoats are safe.


Ourprogressive philosophers have
been considerably startled during
the past week at the revelations OF
oleomargarine,-the latest chemical
substitute for butter. It has been
held as the acme of human wisdom,
to know which side your bread is
buttered on; but now the question
arises with our knowing ones, if
the bread is buttered at all. To
think of amounting your toast with
the marrow of donkey, horse or
a dog is scarcely conducive of that
sweet peace of mind which we are
assured is only the reward Of a
well spent life, and beyond that
there are vague possibilities of old
boots and greasy coats, which
make one feel like exclaiming with
the psalmist of old; ''Vanity, all is
"Vanity!" On the trial in ques-
tion, one witness swore that a care
less. operator in one of the ma
chimes was suddenly deprived Of
his hand. So potent was the power
Of this modern churn, and so effec-
tive the nature Of the chemicals
employed, that in twenty minutes
from the time of the amputation it
was turned out in q frst-class article
of pure olemargarine worth twelve
and a half f-cents pound. Con-
sidering the nature of the ingre-
dents, this cannot be considered
dear; but if any new speculator
wishes to TRY HIS HAND at it,
we would advise him to wait till
olemargarine commands a higher
price in the market.


A general alarm was sent out
from the Brooklyn police head
quarters for the loss of child Of
wealthy parents living in the upper
part of the town. For two days
and nights the father and mother
were in despair, and at last it was
discovered that she had been stolen
by the son and daughter ola neigh
bor,-aged about ten and twelve,-
that they had cropped the child's
| hair of short, and the three had
been begging and sleeping along
the docks.


An enterprising young man whose
income was three dollars and half
week turns up the proprietor OF
no less than three wives. His in
come would allow each dollar a
week if be kept a half a dollar for
himself; but I fear me spring silks
will be a distantly prospective lux
ury to his three wives, notwith-
standing the low price Of dry goods.
I note several failures during the
week, and feeling Of insecurity
seems to pervade all classes. We
miss the usual activity of spring,
the only sign Of actual progress
being in the elevated railroads. We
may not regard rapid transit as an
accomplished fact. and even our
| c4o;1 o1J 4rr,o1, borcoc 1coE No