smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1875

Certain kinds of mistaken DO
likeness, sincere as they are, are
absurd enough to be grotesque.
A common mistake of this sort,
with some persons, even in large
cities, is to say, "ExcUse nay
glove, when they offer the hand to
a casual acquaintance, or on intro
duction to a stranger. 1t might
be inferred from this remark that
the wearing of gloves is extreme
ly rare in a civilized community,
or that the wearer wishes TO ad-
vertise the extraordinary tact
that he has gloves. ALI he really
desires is to appear polite; never
suspecting for moment that he
is simply ridiculous. If you offer
to shake hands with any one in a
place where it is customary to
wear gloves, you certainly need
no excuse for compliance with
the habit. You might with equal
reason, on receiving him at your
house, apologize to him for not
removing your coat before bid
ding him welcome. The super
fiuous phrase probably had its
origin in the days when gloves
were clumsy, and used more fol
protection than as an essential Of
dress. Then the naked hand was
thought to be an evidence Of
good will and cordiality. Since
gloves have been universally
adopted, the idea of asking par
don for wearing them is an an
achronism as we'll as an impro
priety. Gloves are now made tC
fit exactly. so that, were it cour


tesy to take them off on encounter


ing ones friends or acquaintances
an amount of time and trouble
would be required which would
inevitably render a social greeting
at once comfcal exhibition and {


bore.-Scri6ler's MontlIy
Year: 1875

Unbelievers have often told us
that the story Of the prophet
swallowed by a great whale was
an absurdity. They saw that,
being so long in the stomach Of
the monster, the minister would
have been digested: We have no
difficulty in this matter. Jonah
was a most unwilling guest Of
the whale. He wanted to get out.
However much he may have
liked fish, he did not want it three
times day and all the time. So
he kept up a f1dget and a strug-
gle and a turning, and gave the
whale no time to assassinate him.
The man knew that if he was
ever to get out he must be in
perpetual motion. We know
men that are so lethargic that
they would have given the mat.
ter up so quietly that in few
hours they would have gone into
fiukes and fishbones, blowholes
and blubber. Now we see men
all around US who have been
swallowed by monstrous misfOr-
tune. Some eff them sit down on
q piece of whalebone and give up.
They say:


'sNo use! I will never get my
money or restore my good name,
or recover my good health"


They float out to sea and are
never more heard of. Others, the
moment they go down the throat
of some difficulty, begin immedi-
ately to plan for egress. They
make rapid estimate of the length
of the vertebrae, and come to the
conclusion how far they are in.
They dig up as much spermaceti
out of the darkness as will make
q light, and keep turning this
way aud that, till the first thing
you know they are out. Deter.
mination to get well has much to
do with recovered invalidism.
Firm will to defeat bankruptcy
decides financial deliverencc. New
or surrender to misfortune or dis
couragement. You can, if you
are spry enough, make it as un-
comfortable for the whale, as the
whale can make it uncomfortable
for you.


There will be some place where
you can brace your feet against
his ribs and some long upper
tooth, around which you may
take a hold, and he will be as
glad to get rid of you for ten
ant as you are of him for a land
lord. There is a way out, if you
are determined to find it. ALI
our sympsthies are with the
plaintiff, in the suit of Jonah VS..
Leviathan.
Year: 1875

An old lady residing not far
from Exeter was perhaps one of
the most brilliant examples of
conjugal tenderness that the last
century produced. Her husband
had been dying, and at length,
on the clergyman of the parish
making one of his daily visits,
he found him dead. The dis
consulate widow, in giving him
an account of her spouse's last
moments, told him her "poor
dead man kept groaning and
groaning, but could not die; at
last" said she, I recollected [ had
got a piece of new tape in the
drawer; so / took some of that
and tied it as tight as l could
around his neck, and then I stop.
ped his nose with my thumb and
finger, and, poor dear, he went
off like lamb!"
Year: 1875

Her mother had told her not to
marry until she thought she was
able to support a husband; but
she needed not her gentle moth
er's warning; she went and got
civil-contracted to man who
was a fine long winded talker,
and who could sit around and
keep a stove warm better than
any one she ever saw in her life.
And then how proficient he was
in lying in bed snoring, on a De-
cember morning, while she got
up and split the wood, made the
fire, fed the horses, swept the
floor, boiled the coffee, BACKED
his boots, mended that hole in
his coat, sewed ol that sliFj bat
tOn, and laid a pipeful Of tobacco
and the matches alongside his
/ pillow. And how loving she
must have felt toward him, when
he got up at last at about ten o.
clock, cursed her for making a
noise, and wanted to know Why


there was no beatsteak and esal
on the table, and why she hadn't
pawned her Watch-it was a dy


ing mothers gift-in order to give


him whisky money. And when


after three years of this, she lef


him, and went to work as q sew


ing girl, people spoke of the de


pravity of the woman who had
left her husband.
Year: 1875

voCe required OF him than that it is vote
against Catholics, in which they make, ac-
cordlng to the journal, a great mistake. The
Journal calls this persecution, and declares
that those who prosecute Catholics are doing
the most good. The Golden Age gives two
reasons why it thinks the discussion of this
question at all is superhuous, and is merely
the trick of the politicians. In the first
place. it says, the more sensible Catholics
like Father Malone, regard the parochial
schools as mistake and support them
under protest. If they had their way they
would send every Catholic child to the pub
lie schools and keep him there till he gradu-
ated, teaching him the Catholic religion at
home and in the Sunday schools of their
church In the second place. the Protes-
tants so outnumber the Catholics, and are 50
thoroughly committed to the support of the
present school system, that no party would
dare to divide the school fund with any sect,
much less with the Catholics. The Christian
Union declares itself not among those who
regard Catholics as alien to the Republic
and who accuse either the priesthood or the
laity of the Roman Church of design to
overthrow our free institutions
Year: 1875

The recent election in New Jersey, the
campaign in Ohio and the late Evangelical
Conference at Sea Grove, Cape May, have
called especial attention to the disagreements
between Catholics and non-Catholics ON the
school question and kindred topics, and some
of our religious exchanges this week have
differing opinions thereon. The Boston
Pilot fully agrees with the HERALD that ''the
popular heart is with popular education" F"
and adds so is the Catholic heart. But it
says unquestionably Catholics distrust the
public schools and they cannot do other
wise, since there is hardly Catholic child
educated in the public schools who has not
heard teacher sneer at ''Romanists" and
their priests. We venture to doubt
and dispute this statement of the
Pilot-at least SO far as New York is con-
cerned, for the number Of Catholic teachers
in our public schools and their recognized
ability and demeanor preclude the proba-
bility of any such sneers as indicated. The
Pilot thinks there are two settlements of this
school question to be made, the one theolog-
ical and the other political ); and to carry the
former into the latteris q mistake they must
be settled separately--the former by the
Church and the latter by the people at the
polls. Tho Independent cries out for fair
treatment for Catholics on this great oues-
ton, and insists that they are right in op-
posing any political party or clique that is
inimical to their interests and what they be-
lieve to be their rights. The Independent pro-
fesses to see clearly enough the gradual
amelioration and Christianization of Roman
ism in America in the very considerable en-
feeblement of its public insistance on the
corruptions in its theology and the general
Christian temper of the sermons preached
by it's priests. The editor is convinced that
Romanism has learned great deal of Protes-
tantism and that it is approximating to ward
it-not in its historical dogmas, but in it's
actual teaching and worship--quite as fast
as could be expected. The Freemdn's Jour-
nal sneers at the New Jersey hurrah over the
late election, and says that not one citizen
of that State out of ten thousand
has even vague idea of the bear
ing and meaning of any one of the twenty
eight proposed amendments to their constitu-
tion or can give any better reason for tho
Year: 1875

The letter from the Roman Catholic Bishop
of Newark to the priests in his diocese,
recommending them to instruct their pee.
pie to vote against clause in the New Jer.
sey constitutional amendments which would
subject Church property to taxation, has had
result directly opposed to the Bishops
wishes; for it seems to have aroused storm
of Indignation among the Protestants, who,
in almost every locality so far heard from,
have cast heavy majorities for this and most
of the other amendments.


Bishop Corrigan is evidently not poll.
tician. If he had been he might have carried
his point by the help of Professionals 1t is a
fact that, while the Constitutional Commits
sion was in session. and when it was con-
sidering this article of the amendments,
several Methodist preachers meetings in
different parts of New Jersey uttered
public protests against the taxation OF
Church property, and there was good deal
of Protestant opposition to this clause 1t
is as well not to forget this now. The
Roman Catholic Bishop blundered in the
manner of his interference for Americans
do not like to see the clergy of any denomi-
nation '"instructing' their people how to
vote.


We are glad the amendment has been car
ried, forit right that all property should bear
its share of taxation, and there is no more
reason for exempting church or eleemosy-
nary building than club house or a theatre
Of course we mean no disrespect to religion
in this comparison but churches are the
property of private corporations, and are the
legitimate subjects of taxation What it is
useful to remember just now is, that the
Roman Catholic clergy have not been, by any
means, the only clergy who have in New
Jersey, opposed the taxation of Church prop
erty. There are hundreds of churches, the
property of Protestants, all over the State,
whose members will groan when they find
themselves taxed and many of whom, if it
had not been for this sudden alarm at Bishop
Corrigans letter, would have gone quietly
and voted against this amendment AS it is
they have voted for it, and put into the con.
stitution an excellent provision.
Year: 1875

The HORSE RAILROADS are seeking to carry
out Mr. Phillips foolish threat, and it is said
three millions of dollars are to be raised by
she companies to defeat rapid transit. To be
forewarned is to be forearmed.
Year: 1875

PRINCE BIsSIARcK-s DAUGHTER shows the
reckless disregard of consequences so char
Rcteristic of her father. She has been be-
trothed to a man with name so long that
limited space will not admit of its being
printed twice in the same paper and 50 un-
pronounceable that only Aztec nomenclature
can rival it.
Year: 1875

MOODY AND SANKEY yesterday continued
their war upon sin and iniquity at North
field, and it is asserted that the entire Con-
necticut Valley is moved by the revival inAu-
ence. In the HERALD this morning we print
full report of their sayings and doings, and
commend it not only as excellent Sunday
reading, but as fair reflex of the character
of Mr. Moody's discourses.
Year: 1875

the Secretary Of the Interior and the Indian
Commissioner at Professor Marsh, as a
'paleontologist," is turned for he has found
in them two wicked old fossils more remark
able than anything in the Yale collection.
Year: 1875

In London q tradesman has on his sign
'Boxing Glove Maker to Her Majesty" That
sort of sign is not uncommon there. 1t is
even reported that the sign "Hatter by APP
pointment to the President of the United
States" figures in the number of queer in
scriptions that tend to enliven a London
ramble Hitherto however, there has not
been in this country any such recognized
connection between exalted station and the
retail trade. Politics and peanuts have been
kept scrupulously apart. But the times are
mending in this respect if we may believe
the thrifty citizen who was lately tumbled
out of q corner in the Post Office, where he
had established himself in apple pie order.
The pieman of the administration has de-
fined his position, and has informed the
nations that if the editors of this city were
not grossly ignorant of the law they could
not have supposed he was member of Con-
gress, for otherwise they must have known
that he could not have held the two places at
once. From which it plainly appears that
he understands that the man who is author
lied to sell pies in a post Office holds an
official position under the government, and is,
in plain terms, "Pieman to their Excellencies
the President and Members of the Cabinet"
This shows how we are aping the effete mon
arches and how the purity of our republi-
can institutions is passing away. Altogether
we do not see that pieman with these ex-
alted fancies is to be pitied for the loss of
corner. He will do well enough on any cor
ner, and if he sells honest, virtuous and
strictly republican pie over the way we can
assure him that the advertising he has got by
his expulsion will make his fortune. In the
meantime the telegraph Office that is to be
put where he was will fill the place more ap-
propriately, and a stationery stand with ma
terial for letters and handy pen and ink
for the public would be useful in the other
corner.
Year: 1875

PRoFEssoB MARSH deserves the thanks of
all right-minded men for the persistent cour-
age ho has shown in keeping his compact
with Red Cloud. In the beginning he was
sneered at by the Interior Department rs an
insignificant enemy, but he stood his ground
80 manfully and established his charges SO
satisfactorily that even Mr. Delano is no
longer in doubt about his personality. His
courage also gave courage to others, and his
plain speaking is bearing the best Of fruits.


Yesterday we printed the testimony of
Bishop Hare, which corroborated that Of
Professor Marsh and this morning we have
the further evidence of Mr. Walker, which
proves the main points of his charges. The
exposure has been one of the completest
made in many years, and the Indian Bureau
and the Interior Department have no longer
a peg left on which to hang an argument in
their own behalf Even the latest sneer OF
Year: 1875

VICE PRESIDENT WILSON has written let
ter on the political situation, and he calls his
platitudes policy. Whatever there is of
policy in the Vice Presidents letter is in his
pressing anxiety for the party to rely on its
tried and trained leaders Evidently Mr..
long enough.
Year: 1875

THE SHINING OF THE EQUNox is one of
the most terrible disasters of the kind on
record Entirely without warning the pro-
peller was overturned and sunk in an in
slant, carrying down with it all on board.
Year: 1875

For SYRACUSE. Democratic eyes just now
are turning toward Syracuse with longing
looks, and even Kelly's stanchest warriors
fear that there Tammany's troubles are only
TO begin. The hayloft and cheesepress
democracy is likely to be troublesome, and
may go SO far as to put the Tammany dele
cation out in the cold. The situation is
critical one aud there is much anxious talk
both within and without the Wigwam.
Year: 1875

We have never yet heard of rot appear ing in grapes of the first or second year s bearing. We believe that it is because, up to this time, there has been but little pruning done. You disturb the func- tions of the vine by close pruning and over cropping. It gives the vine too much root. If you have large root power, great quantity of crude, un- ripened sap is taken up. It is the raw material to make sap of. It goes to the foliage and is there elaborated and changed into true sap, so as to be made into fruit, wood and root in the proper and healthy way. Suppose you have q vine, and confine it to stake, say six feet high, year after year, or to trellis which is six feet high, with lateral arms six feet long, and you have root power sufficient to carry it forty feet in every direction, it is clear that if you do not give it extension you cannot have the foliage to elaborate that crude sap into the true sap. What happens4 Why, this crude, unripened sap surcharges the grape. When this crude sap has once got to the grape, the circulation of the sap in the vine, and all its natural processes, are impeded for want of foliage, and the berry is engorged with unripe sap from the surface of the grape. it is srrcharged with unripe juice, which, when the finer functions of the grapes come into play, charges the tissue, rots it, and the grape perishes and falls.- Ieras Farmer.
Year: 1875

Lord Macaulay, when a young and unknown man, was visiting Rome, and one night he went to see the Coliseum by moonlight. While alone under the dark arches, where it is as black as night, all of sudden man in large cloak brushed past him rather rudely, as Macaulay thought, and passed on into the darkness. Macaulay's first impulse was to clap his hand to his watch-pocket; and sure enough he found that his watch was not there. He looked after the man, who he doubted not had stolen his watch as he brushed past him, and peer ing into the darkness, could just dis tinguish the outline of figure moving away. Macaulay rushed after him, over took him, and, seizing him by the collar, demanded his watch. Macaulay could speak very little Italian, and under stood none when spoken; so he was obliged to limit his attack on the thief to violent shaking of him by the collar, and an angry repetition of the demand. "Orologio! Orologio!" (Watch i! Watch ) The man thus attacked poured forth torrent of rapidly spoken words, of which Macaulay understood not one syllable. But he again admin istered severe shaking to his captive, stamping his foot angrily on the ground, and again vociferating, "Orologio ]! Orologio!" Whereupon the detected thief drew forth the watch and handed it to his captor Macaulay, satisfied with his prowess in having thus recaptpred his property, and not caring for the trouble of pursuing the matter any further, turned on his heel as he pocketed the watch, and saw nothing more of the man. But, when he returned to his apartment at night, his landlady met him at the door, holding out something in her hand, saying "Oh, sir, you left your watch on the table, so thought 1t better to take care of it. Here it is. " "Good gracious What it this, then What is the meaning of it2" stammered Maeaulay, drawing from his pocket the watch he had so gallantly recovered in the Coliseum. It was watch he had never seen before. The truth was plain he had been the thief! The poor man he had so violently attacked and apos- trophised in the darkness and solitude of the Coliseum arches had been terri fled into surrendering his own watch to the resolute ruffian who, as he conceived, had pursued him to rob him. The next morning Macaulay, not little crest fallen, hastened to the office of the ques- tor with the watch, and told his story. "Ah, I see," said the questor, "you had better leave the watch with mo. I will make your excuses to the owner of it !; he has already been here to de- nounce you.
Year: 1875

There was received at the Dead-letter office of the United States Post-office department package containing one half dozen snakes, two of them dend and the remainder alive. Ono of them is a copperhead, five feet long. The reptiles were incloscd in tin box, perforated with holes, and were addressed to Ger many, but had been stopped at New York on account of overweight, the postage not being sufficient. Until the dead letter opener has satisfactorily explained his mode of life for Il week past this snake story must be taken with plenty of salt,
Year: 1875

SHE D1p.-Seventeen years ago a Louisville young woman was told by 8 clairvoyant that she was destined to marry an auburn haired young man with blue eyes and heavy mustache; that he would soon be rich, and that they would have two children-a boy and a girl. She did marry the auburn haired man. They have five children now, the auburn hair has disappeared from the top of the husbands head, and he is get ting fifteen dollars week.
Year: 1875

Whether the tempests Hull or blow, Whether the currents ebb or flow, Whether the future smile or no, Whether the harvssts blight or grow, Whether the years are swift or slow, In days of joy or days of woe,

 In fortune high or fortune low, This be my creed for friend or foe Gather the roses as you go. ., ..
Year: 1875

While offering to the Prince his hearty congratulations on the happy event, Stockmar coupled them with earnest counsels as to the course which must be pursued in laying the foundations of his future happiness, and in fulfilling wor- thily the duties of his high position.

 To this the Prince replied in strain of lofty aspiration, md with @ deep sense of the great part he was to play in his new career, which evinced true nobility of character, and promised well for the future. Neither the happiness of love a happiness in his case made more intense by the singular purity and unselfshness of his own nature, on which the devotion shown him seems to have come with 0 bswildering strangeness-nor the bril-
Year: 1875

AN IMPERIAL TRAGEDY-Thc report that
the empress OF China has committee suicide,
being overcome with grief at the death OF the
emperor, gives tragic element 10 an event
already politically important enough to at
tract universal attention. In its way, this
imperial tragedy i'm China is only less i'm
preSSive and sad than the imperial tragedy
in McXicO-the woe of heart-brOken and
craZed CarlOtta over the death Of her hus-
band, the Emperor Maximilian. Indeed, the
whole story of the dramatic and mournfully-
ending career OF the young Chinese empress
reads like romance. Her selection out OF
several hundred competitors brought success
Sively TO the notice and inspection of the
young emperor, her BRIEF career on the
throne, and her pitiable end, form a strange
story.
Year: 1875

SENATOR CARPENTER arrived i'm Mil
waukee last night from Madison, and was
met at the depot by about one thousand cit
IZens. who detached the horses from his
sleigh and drew him through the principal
streets amid enthusiastic demonstrations
At the Marshall house he made a brief speech,
promising to address his fellow-citizens be-
fore his departure for Washington.
Year: 1875

DROUGHT IN NEW HAMPSHIRE.-In New
Hampshire the drought is much aggravated
by the extremely cold weather, which freezes
up what little water there is, many farmers
being obliged to melt snow to water their
cattle. Pipes and reservoirs are everywhere
frozen, and the Nashua manufactures run
but three hours day, fearing that the ice in
their canals will crush down and freeze TO
the bottom, and in many other sections they
have stopped altogether.