Year: 1866




man, called the human race. and the


horse race, which some consider inhu-


man The Indian race is nearly run. A


mill race or race to mill occurs


when a prize fight is announced. OF all


the races that have been upon the tapis


recently the black race attracts the most


of public attention. Congressman make


speeches upon it. clergymen preach h


about it. and Wendell Phillips is ready


to bet his money on it.


fatter myself that / know something


about the horse race. had 8 passion


for horse racing when lad. and used to


run horses with a neighbor's boy in


Tompkin's lane How vividly do l re
call my last race. l rode the governors 5


grass fed mare. sorrel roam, if l re,


member correctly. with two white feet


in the forehead. She was q little foun.
( dered in one eye, but with the exception
| Of something like watermelon on each


knee. her intellect Was unimpaired. She


WAS sired by Canal Horse. and d--d by


every one who drove her. Neighbor's


boy rode a cream colored chestnut, with
a spring halt to harness. On the home
stretch | was neck and half q shoul-
der blade behind. gently encouraging
the old mare to do her level hest by the
application of corn cutter to her aged
ribs. The limp which she had in her
eve prevented her taking a clear view of
a heap of cobble stones in the lane, and
when she struck them there was a stun
| BILE, a clatter OF stones, hose shoes and
ed and no insurance


! was picked up bleeding and insensi-
BILE, and | made the remainder of the
str tDl t,ho
under one blanket. The race was de.
cided in my favor The judges allowed
although i was neck behind when the
old mare stumbled, yet, as l escaped
without my neck being broken, came
out neck ahead
Although exceedingly fond OF tile
races, 1 don't attend them very often
now days. My corpulency is too an
noying. They charge me double Tor my
ticket, and l can only get through the
horse gate. Then the boys yell, Here
comes the prize OK - and insist on my
being trotted over the course to show my
points.


Tue first thing that struck me at a
race course-no, not the first thing, for
that was the shaft to sulky, but the
next thing-was the open disregard of
the rules of the course. Although .'pub
lie stand" was painted upon q shed in
letters 50 large that the horse that runs
may read, there were the public sitting
down. But the public have to stand a
great deal at the race course saw au
other shed labelled reporters stand I
asked a reporter what it meant. and he i
WHISPERED, ''stand treat" stood it.


Bidding off pools for the horses" /
was the reply received. when / inouir- |
ed the meaning of an auction scene on
the course.


l innocent!y inquired if these pools |
were horse ponds, but he only gave me
look of silent contempt [ finally
dropped fifty dollar noe in one OF
those pools. No more pool for me.


Foot races are not as popular ~ they
once were. People are too lazs to run
now, unless they run for office. / ran
for prize once ia a foot race. l was
not quite as fat as ! am now only
weighed four hundred and forty-seven
pounds. 1t happened thus: I was at
tending the Oneida County Fair at Utica
They got up prize for the fastest run
ner. In those days this was before the
onerous tax on whisky l used to in
aulge occasionally in that cup which
makes rs cheer and be m inebriate, as
Cowper has it. In a playful moment l
asked the boys to get me tight and have
fun With me. and they took me at my
word. The bar keeper assisted them bv
putting liquor in my gin cock all. while
my back was turned. adding alcoholic
sumulans 30 my whisky, and pouring de-
coctions OF malt into my beer. 1 have
since suspected that tobacco was mingled
with my cigars, but on that point am
not quite clear.


Although it exhausted the contents of
nearly every bar on the ground to do it,
yet got full and the fumes of the
liquor arose from my stomach to my
brain, as from an immense cauldron,
causing me to behave in the most ridicu /
lous and insane manner. ! felt as ethe-
rial as sylph, and actually went thro'
with a flip flap, landed on my back. +
attempted to throw back summersault''
through balloon, resulting in the total
annihilation of confectionery stand,
into which dove head FIRST; ruthless
ly seized the Fat Woman" in her tent.
and spun her round in a waltz until she
shrieked- l offered to permit the .sLiv- /
ing Skeleton to hold me out at arms /
length, sitting on his palm. Ny absurd !
tiles drew crowd of delighted specta- :
tors, and when it was suggested to me
that should compete for the prize at
VIC ioos race, IOOi guAs WAS, eagerly +
jumped at the offer.
p No Athenian athlete ever entered the /
area amid such tumultuous applause, as
greeted my appearance upon the course,
peeled for the race. Talk about the
Grecian games; they afford no such game
as did that day There stood among
the other contestants, pants secured
around the waist with several pairs of
borrowed suspenders. inv own wore in
sufficient to go round. shirt collar un
buttoned and bald head shining in the
sun like polished snuf-bladder, or ten
cent watermelon


The crowd jeered and yelled. One ad
vised me to lie down and roll around the
course Another said if / couldn't run
around had better black my face and
try walk around think he was
minstrel.


ou run foot race ?" said 4 butch
er derisiyely taking in mv ei~o al ..