smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1867

A Western paper tells the following:


An accident of a remarkable nature occur
red in the woods of neighboring county, last
week by which man was thrown eighty feet
in the air. He was standing on a balanced
tree lying across large log, to see another
tree come down, when the tree in its falling
course struck the other end OF the tree on
which he was standing, and the tremendous
weight OF it coming on the spring lever. threw
him Ikea shot into the air.


The remarkable part of the story remains
to be told. When at his highest elevation
the man caught hold of the top of a tree
about fifteen feet from the trunk. and remain
ed suspended by the arms until the person
who had felled the tree travelled distance of
hye miles and returned with help and lad
der before he could be released from his per-
llous position. He was found in the same
position as when left, evidently in the best
OF spirits, tor he was whistlins "Yankee
Doodie, and making strong fight with his
feet against a delegation of Wasps that were
endeavorlng to build a nest in his pants.
he said, upon reaching the ground that he
had had "heathy time," with the "var-
mInts," and attributed his powers of endur-
ance wholly to the hotly contested canvass he
had with the 'eritters' by their persistent
lire in the rear" and the tremendous excite
meat thereto tl4.,. s.ft-y sfets5


II that man ever gets into Office he will be
provided Tor, for the rest OF his natural life
de Will know how to hang on to it.
Year: 1867

The new publications Of these works will be in
several forms of unusual elegance, and ALL in pro-
portion to moderate price for each combining good
taste with economy The series will be issued in the
following order, punctually on the first day of each
month until completed, beginning with October:
Year: 1867

JOSH BILLINGS SAYNGs.-There is
phew men who have character enuf to
Iced life of idleness.


A puppy plays with every pup he
meets, but old dogs have but few
associates.


when man Iooses his health, then
he fust begins to take good care of it.
This IS good Judgment, this is!


Most people decline to learn only
by their own experience. And | guess
they are more than half right, for | do
not spose a man can get a perfect
idee of molasses candy by letting
another felIer taste of it for him.


Success in life is very apt to make
rs forget the time when we WASH
much. 1t is just so with the frog on
the jump; he can't remember when he
was tad-pole-but other folks can.
Year: 1867

Here is a clever bit ofdomestic painting ,whic
my one will admit is done with homely fidelity
can fold up my claws
In my soft velvet paws
And pur in the sun
Till the short day is done


POr am the family cat.
can doze by the hour
In the vine-covered bower,
Winking and blinking
Through the sunshine and the shower


For am the family cat.
From the goosebury bush,
Or where bright currents blush,
may suddenly spring
For bird on the wing,
Or dart up a tree,
If brown nest see,
And select a choice morsel
For dinner or tea,
And no one would blame me,
Berate me or shame me-


For am the family cat.
In the cold winter night
~v-i-~n tIo StOunus stAU 1iI " nitv,
And the clcles shine
III long silver line,
| stay not to shiver
In the moonbeam's pale quiver,
But curl up in the house
As snug as a mouse,
And play Jack Horner,
In the cOsiest corner,
Breaking nobody'S laws,
With my chin onmy paws,
sleep with one eye and awake with the other,
or pats from the children, kind words from thC
mother
For 1 am the family cat.
Year: 1867

A clergyman has published a pam
phlet in which he informs the world
that the place called "Hell" is just
1000 miles down from the surface of
the earth, and that the least spark
from it thrown into the ocean would
dry up all the waters aud set the
world in a blaze.
Year: 1867

its effect in Kansas, and making
strong appeals for the ballot for wo-
men. but the greater part of the. even
in was taken up by George Francis
Train. who spoke three times in his
usual rambling, egotistical manner.
making no points worthy of note, and
accomplishing nothing except keep
ing the audience in good humor, and
getting himself nominated for the
Presidency in 1868.
Year: 1867

That the mother who neglects to provide
MRS. WINSLOW'S SOOTHING SYRUP
for her suffering child is depriying the little
sufferer of the remedy Of all the world best
calculated to give il rest and restore it TO
health. There is not a mother who has ever
used it, but what will tell You at once that
it will regulate the bowels, and give rest
and health 10 the child, and.is perfectly safe



all cases.
Year: 1867

School NOMINATIONS meeting At
the Court House this evening is called At Z
o'clock. to nominate candidates for the
School Board. Let there be good turn
out Of all citizens interested in the prosper
ity Of our schools.
Year: 1867

entire conservative portion or the people 90 heartily and
vigorously into the work. using the Influences which In
minded negro who from childhood, has known only TO


look up to them for advice and counsel IN all personal
private affairs and certainly should now nnd no reason
for looking others guidance In this new subject Of
important interest TO them


Most especially are We sure that In this State whore
there IS 40 such majority OF black votes, decidedly
conservative conven on be elected, If every white
thas ID eligible votes and for the best men to be
found ald Influences many Of the colored votes with


II is not question or submission to military rule for
life and handing il down 70 children, Mr. Perry
sha lie supney on our backs and let The rule pass into


the hands Of the worst and most prescrpve men, with
the most objectionable constitutions or whether wo
SHALL by activity and untirng work create for States
the liberal constitutions, compatible with the
many undoubtedly Objectionable hut unavoidable fsa-
sentation tho best men eligible under the same


One word more and we leave Governor Perry and his
"nou action policy for the present.


only be represented BY negroes black republicans OF
perjured Southernera We bog TO differ directly. All
and become as thoroughly identified citizens as though
born here have planted their cotton seed raised their
mills shops or factores-n some way given the pledge
Of true citzenshipmen who, born and reared at the
North, with State rights views and only knowing the
whole nation acting like men, In accordance with thor
settled convictions Of right fought n the federal M
who are not were ever black republicans; men
who had no prejudces In this war; fanatcism to fight
Ior simply desiring tne ro6torati0n OF the Union az
was. When the closed and armed forces had laid
down their arms and dispersed they thought the ques
tion settled and willing to grant general amnesty
to all returning 10 their loyalty They have among
Us with only kindly feelings are Of interests
In the future must be shared by them aud why should
we not trust themf They can without perjury. take
the required oaths and why not represent us until the
disability OF SO many OF old and trusted citizens be
removed must be the case after full restora
tion OF our rights In the nation.


RELATIVE STRENGTH WHITES AND BLACKS IN ALA


BAMA.


gentleman In Montgomery, Ala, after careful ex-
animation Of the state for 1885, concludes that the
number of persons who will register voters will be about
hundred and eighty thousand divide almost equally
between the whites and blacksthe latter, II anything
being in majority. He estimates Of the hundred
delegates to be appointed among the several counties
South and Central Alabama will have sxtysx members
in the convention and North Alabama -four, by
which will be seen that the Northern portion of the
State henceforth It's controlling influence In the
State Legislature In Mobile county the white voters
will be in majority Of two to one over the blacks.
Year: 1867

A LAZY boy makes a lazy man, just
as sure as crooked sapling makes a
crooked tree. Who ever vet saw a
boy grow up in idleness, that did not
make shiftless vagabond when he be-
came a man, unless he had a fortune
left him to keep up appearances The
great mass of thieves, paupers and
criminals that fill our penitentiaries and
almshouses, have come to what they are
by being brought up in idleness. Those
who constitute the business part of the
community-those who make our great
and useful men-were taught in their
bophood to be Industrious.
Year: 1867

COOPERATION OF THE WIFE.-There
is much good sense and truth in the re-
mark that no man ever prospered in the
world without the cooperation of his
wife. If she unites in endeavors to re-
ward his labor with an endearing smile,
with what confidence will he resort to
his merchandise or his farm, fly over
lands, sail upon the seas, meet Difficult
ty, or encounter danger, if he knows he
is not spending his strength in vain, but
that his labor will be rewarded by the
sweets Of home.
Year: 1867

THE most agreeable of all compan-
ions is the simple and frank person
without any high pretensions to an op-
pressive gentleness ; one who loves life
and understans the use of it; obliging
alike at all hours and, above all, of a
golden temper, and steadfast as an an
chor. For such a one We most gladly
exchange the greatest genius. the most
brilliant Wit, and the profoundest think
Year: 1867

THE latest style of bonnet has Just
made Its appearance. 1t is called the
" Revenue Cutter" and consists of a
two-cent internal revenue stamp, worn
on the head and tied under each ear
with horse hair. 1t presents very
pretty appearance from distance, and
must be very comfortable at this season
of the year.
Year: 1867

staring them in the face, they became
so despondent that they could not
swear enough, and the Board of Regis.
tration themselves, seeing the state of
affairs, had the blues, and the result
was that their party w1s badly beaten
in this county, and now we have moth
ing to fear from them, because the
more they strike off of the list of voters
the more turn to the Democrats.


have but one word mora, and fear
that have now worried your parience
and taken too much of your space al
ready, but please indulge me o few
lines more. want to tell you, and the
public generally, that the Sheriff still
continues to summon his political grand
juries. We took look at the grand
jury ofonr last term of four Circuit Court
and if would have been sworn to sum-
mon a jury composed of the most illit-
erte, the lowest and most prejudiced
class of our inhabitants, we would
have summoned, perhaps, the same
jury, with one or two exceptions. Large
portions of the comfy had no represen-
tative on that jury, from the fact that
there were more of the Radical stripe to
be found in that quarter of the county.
No indictments can be made against any
Radical in the county, while such jurors
are summoned, it matters not what he
may havedone. But we feel that their
end is near at hand, when times will
change and men who will administer
the affairs of the Government as it
should be, will again be in power.


FAIR PLAY.
Year: 1867

arrangement of business would be hurt.


full under such circumstances. We


want to approach free trade gradually


by regular steps of tariff reduction,
diminishing prices in CORES.
ponding ratio. The very fact that
a particular branch of home
manufacture cannot compete with
the foreign made article, is evidence
that the capital employed in that busi-
ness can be used to better advantage in
some other direction. The capital and
labor of this country ought to be en-
ployed in the channels where the nat
ural laws of business would force them,
If untrammeled by legislation. There
are great many things that we
can produce to better advantage
than any other country in the
world, and to these our atten-
tion should be directed. If it costs
twice as much to manufacture a given
article in this country as it does in
Europe, it is great mistako'to "pro-
tect" the homemade article to an ex-
tent that will eblige consumers to pay
twice as much for it as they ought to
do. No, the true policy is to diminish
not to increase-the tariff. Let our in
dustry and capital be employed in pro-
ducts with which we can undersell
Europe, and then let us buy from
Europe what we cannot produce adj
H". 80
Year: 1867

A correspondent desires to know why


We say nothing in advocacy of further
protection to home industry" at a


time when manufacturers are discharg-


ing vorkmen aud closing business, be-
cause of their inability to compete with


foreign goods. The question is fair
one, aud We will answer it plainly.


We do not advocate an increase of tariff
simply because We think that workmen
AID all other classes of consumers are
already carrying about all the burden


they eau bear. If We thought it desira-
bic for wOrkmen TO make an indirect
contribution for the further enrich
ment Of manufacturers, We could


md no surer plan than that
which is enormously called "pro-
lection TO home industry" Why are
manufacturers closing business aud dis.
charging workmen al the present time '
Simply because the prices of foreign
goods are settling down to their nominal
value, necessitatins corresponding
decline in domestic goods. This decline
makes heavy inroads upon the profits Of
home manufacturers, and therefore they
clsmor for a higher tariff, so as to keep
back foreign competition and allow
high prices to rule. The interests of the
manufacturers demand high prices, but
consumers-particularly the working
classes-are anxious TO have prices just
AS low rs possible. Suppose, now, that
Congress should grant further protec-
tion TO home manufacturers, what would
be the consequence Foreign goods
would, to a certain extent, be known
out Of our markets, and prices would at
once advance. If the import duties
were made heavy enough to be prohib-
itory, the result would be TO give the
makers of homemade goods a complete
monopoly, and enable them to run up
prices as high as they please to do. So
called protection" is the natural enemy
OF low prices. The higher the tariff the
more consumers will have to pay fol
their goods, and the greater will be the
profits of capitalists. There is no great


CT economic heresy than that to which
our correspondent seems to be welded
Protection is the enemy, not the friend
Of tho working classes. If there
were no protective tariff, working
men would now Le able to buy theil
dry goods, groceries and other arti
cles of household consumption at abou


the same low rates that are now curren


in Europe. A dollar then wonld b,
worth IS much as two or three dollar


now. What the interests of the work
Ing clEsses require is free trade-jus


the oppo site Of protection. 1t wouN,
not be wise to make Q sudden juml
from the present tariff policy to that o
complete free trade, for the tsmporsr
Year: 1867

Steam, it appears, is at present en-
ployed quite successfully in pulling
down houses, where the contractor cares
little about preserving the materials
In constructing the works for the extern
sion OF the Metropolitan Railway, in
London, q large number of very old
brick houses had to be removed; and a
novel method was adopted for effecting
the purpose. at the suggestion of one OF
the contractors. A long chain was
placed around the base of block of five
small houses and attached to a power
full steam engine, so that when the lat
ter was put in motion the houses fell to
the ground with a terrific report and an
impenetrable cloud of dust.
Year: 1867

The solution of the national problem
was foreshown in miniature in the Dis
trict of Columbia the other day. George
town was redeemed by Radical voters.
1t was shown that the colored men
know better than to vote with the pro-
slavery party, and what white men and
colored men can both vote without ga
war of races Probably there was
some danger of disorder to be guarded
against, but it was easily guarded
against, and efectually. There was
never more peaceful election. The
same thing can be repeated on grand
scale. As to the apprehension of ga
war of races in such an event, the
Georgetown experiment also furnishes
striking Illustration of the facility with
which even prejudiced whites become
ashamed of their prejudice, and lose all
their aversion to seeing the negro at the
ballot box. A correspondent who Wis
tied the polls on the occasion named,
says:


A venerable colored citizen gives us a
ticket of the kind he voted 1t had at
the top picture of the black mans
friend, Father Abraham. Passing on
to one poll, we found an orderly crowd,
about one-fourth blacks. Policemen
were stationed at the window where
the tickets were handed in, but this dis
play of uniforms and clubs appeared to
be entirely unnecessary, unless it was to
curb the rebellious spirits of the "se-
cesh, " who indicated their opposition by
wry faces and contemptuous mien.


One of them broke out in this strain:
'"These ID niggers only had to pre-
sent themselves to the board of registry
and certify that they were residents Of
Georgetown, and they were enrolled,
but we white folks had to answer a lot
of questions, such as, did you aid or
assist the rebellion?' ? and we had to
swear we were loyal" Here is the rub.
These questions were not asked the
freedmen, because they were all loyal.
At another poll in an adjoining ward,
the colored voters numbered four-ffths.
They were ranged in long line and
voted in turn. Two negro voters made
a tally of each voter, and two others
stood ready to vouch for any voter of
whom there might be any doubt in iden-
tity or name. A more orderly election
| never saw, and this was also the testi-
mony of the gentleman with me, who is
an old pro-slavery Democrat. He came
away saying, "These men are intelli-
gent enough to vote; respectable enough;
more decently behaved men 1 never saw;
they are loyal, and what is the reason
they should not vote ? There is no rea-
son. In fact, he grew decidedly enthu-
siastic in favor of universal suffrage and
boldly announced that henceforth he
was on the side Of justice and right and
should array himself against the party
of prejudice and CASTE Every negro
had smile on his face, but no taunts
or boasting was heard -Missouri DEM
0crdt.
Year: 1867

AN ACCOMMODATING FAMILY-In an
eastern exchange we find the following,
which speaks rather literally for the
folks advertising, considering the style
of the age:


Wanted-a general servant in small
family where man is kept. The
housework and cooking all done by the
members Of the family. The gentleman
of the house rises early, but prepares
breakfast himself All the washing is
put out, and the kitchen is provided
with every comfort and luxury. Cold
meat and hash studiousl y avoided. Wa
ges no object to competent party
References and photographs exchanged.
Address, &c.
Year: 1867

Oh! fair is the sunshine
On mountain and lea,
On cornfeld and meadow,
On river and tree.
1t makes all creation


Rejoice in its smile,
And the husbandman see
The reward of his toll.
But if always 'twere shining
And day always bright,
Without the repose


And the darkness of night,
1t would prove but curse,
1t would madden the brain
Turn rapture to sorrow,
And pleasure to pain.
But there is a sunshine
That never destroys.
And does not debilita
Him who enjoys;
No darkness is needed


To deaden its sheen,
No night is required


From its lustre to screen.
Oh, happy! thrice happy!
That sunshine who gain;
1t may beam through their life,
And waken no pain,
For its soft gentle beams


Only pleasure impart-
'Tis the light of true love
In the depths of the heart.
And there is sunshine


More beautiful still,
Whose beams with their splendor
The universe fill;
On the mind and the soul
Its rich lustre is shed,
Giving sight to the blind


And new life TO the dead;
Through unceasing duration
That sunshine shall last,
Illuming the future,


Recalling the past.
To impart it the earth


As a creature He trod;
'Tis the light of His glory.
The manifest God.
Year: 1867

THE DEVIL RIGHT.-A prosy lay
member of the church rose in meeting
and said:


"My friends, the devil and I have
been fighting for more than twenty
minutes. He told me not to speak to-
night, but l determined that l would.
He said that some of the rest could
speak better than l, but still I felt that
l could not keep silent. He even whis-
pered that spoke too often, and that
nobody wanted to hear me; but [ was
not to be put down that way-and now
I have gained the victory 1 must tell
you all that is in my heart" Then fol-
lowed tedious harargre.


Coming out of the session room, the
good pastor inclined his head so that
his mouth approached the ear of the
militant member, and then whispered,
Brother, l think that the devil was
right"
Year: 1867

In the horizons verge,
Where our futures ever setting sun


Lights up the skies,
Bright with all glory which the day hath won,
An island lies.


Far DER the tossing sea,
Beyond all storm and gloom that lie between
Its hills appear,
Forever smiling in that light serene,


Distinct and clear.


And ever thitherward
The wide-winged carrier birds of promise fly,
And on the shore
The crested waves of hope are dashing high
For evermore.


'Tis an enchanted isle,
That magic "sometime'' in the sunset sea,


Yet know we well
That in its valleys all bright things shall be,
All good shall dwell.


"Sometime'' we well believe,
We shall have passed the trouble and strife,
And in that isle
Enjoy the fullness of that summer life


And rest while.


Somehow we know full well
That It's an island, though its green hills hide
The distant surge,
And far beyond it other phantoms glide,


And isles emerge.


That "Sometime" gaze we still
We cannot help but gaze; still let US dream
Far be the hour
When it shall vanish in the suns last beam,
And smile no more
Year: 1867

THE Daily Wisconsin tells Of man
hale and vigorous with rife bullet
still in bis brain, received at the battle
of Bull Run. He was in hospital for
a year, but can now swing an ak or
scythe with anybody.
Year: 1867

Reader, this is no fancy sketch, but
an incident from life in Virginia. We
are cogrizant of the details, and glad
to state that the erring husband has
taken solemn oath never to again
"touch, taste nor handle" the accursed
wine cup; upon which assurance the
wife of his heart has again taken him to
her bosom. May he keep sacred his
promise.
Year: 1867

York. | did not attempt any explana-
tion, but l steadily resisted all the old
gentleman's entreaties to 60 on with it
any further even managed to per-
suade him to close up his gold account
and quit it. | had Lucille to help me
in that.


The net figure was handsome one,
l tell you, and there was very little
trouble about making the other arrange.
ments after my bank account was made
up. My honored father-in-law has the
bliudest faith in my judgment but l
told Lucille all about it. What more,
l don't and won't speculate, and l won t
do business for any firm that does. It's
all clear case of luck -


John threw the stump of his cigar
into the ashes, and l pulled away at
mine, wondering if there was any luck
IN my getting that bit of shell in my
ankle.
Year: 1867




A CLERK PUTs HIS FooT IN IT.
The following circumstance is wholly
true, and while it occurred several
months since, it has not been publicly
spoken of until recently: A gentleman
who had long been absent from home,
returned, and after rest he and his
wife went to indianapolis, Indiana, to
spend day or two as pleasurably as the
institutions of the Hoosier capital might
permit. Going to one of the best hotels
where the gentleman was we'll acquaint-
ed, he registered his name sand lady. "
The clerk looked at him with a smile
and said, "you can't play that on me
that lady has been here half dozen
times, with as many men, and each one
said she was his wife" Here was
trouble. The gentleman swore, the
clerk saw that he had made an ass of
himself. Omitting particulars we will
state that the five or six gentlemen were
sent for; they met, and having divided
their greenbacks with the husband, the
latter informed them that they might
"draw cuts' for his wife, since which
speech his whereabouts has not been
known to any interested parties.