smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1878

The Herald Steam Printing House is
not surpassed by any Job Printing Office
ON the Pacific Coast, outside of San Fran
cisco, In facilities for doing job work,
Low prices, good work and expedition
may be relied upon at this Office.
Year: 1878

l'rom tho Golden HI lNrlJ New.


There was fight advertised To come
of 1T the Allambm Theatre, Sunday
afternoon, between I'm Eastern fighting
bulldog named TURK and forty-tWo
pound wildcat, a vicious brute, for 100
!; side that is, the cat and dog were to
fight for their lives ana men bet 500 4
side on the result The fight was to he
followed by a grand olio on the stage. 1t
was an immense Vii, ana it drew. III
due time the eat was introduced upon the
stage, and was immediately followed by
Turk but at the tirst kiss Of the dog tho
eat took to the audience and the Clio, III
stead of being performed by the troup,
was done Ny the spectators, tooth ana
toe-nail accompaniment. The first bound
OF the cat took it upon the piano of the
orchestra. The paWer Of ivory left the
swelling strain unfinished, ana turned Il
back handspring over among the audi
ence. The next ,eap Of the 'yarmint"
was at the COntrabass, and both player
and instrument went down instantly with
broken heads. The cat fingered lovingly
a moment among the strings as if to test
their quality, and then sprang out among
the audience Then began an OliO in
dead earnest, and not the one advertised
although the fight was over. 1t consisted
of ground and lofty tumbling, leap frog
and such like tcats Of deXteiity, all hay
ing a single object to amuse the audi
cnce by glimpse Of sunlight out Of doors
and under the free light of heaven once
more. 1t was perfectly satisfactory as a
whole, and each player did his best
Time shortest on record -l.G9. Every
thing went of well, especially the audi
ence, The cat was found few moments
later, looking out Of one Of the boxes and
waiting for an encore.
Year: 1878

The CHARACTERIsTIcs OF A GEN
TLEMAS.-"What is 1t to be gentle
mans Is it to have lofty aims, to lead
pure life. to keep your honor virgin,
to have the esteem of your fellOw.citi.
zens, and the love of your freside, to
bear good fortune meekly, to suffer
evil with constancy, and through evil
or good tc maintain truth alwaysS
Show me the happy man whose life
exhibits these qualities, and him we
will salute as gentleman, whatever
his rank may be; show me the prince
who possesses them, and he may be
sure of our love and loyalty
[Thackeray.
Year: 1878

Two courses are always open to the
defeated candidate. One is to sulk.
The other is to pocket his ehagrin like
a man, and do such good W, rk for the
people that they will be sorry they
did NOT elect him. Defeated candid
ates would choose the latter cours e
much oftener than they do, were it
not for what they call proper sense Of
dignity, but what is reallya childish
resentment, born of wounded vanity.
The people had the chance to secure
my services in this office; they have
preferred this other man, every way
less worthy; very well; | wish them
joy of him, aud wash my hands OF
the whole business, Weshall see how
they will get along without me-" This
feeling may be natural, but it is petty
and childish. A man should be
ashamed to yield tn it.-l New York
sun.
Year: 1878

Nowadays when n man shufiies ofl


this mortal coil, before he is well set.


tied in his earthen couch, somebody


rushes into the newspaper offices with
a lot Of gush bearing the above title,


which the editor is expected to publish
aud believe.


To read these stereotyped resolu.
tons. beginning, Whereas, 1t has
pleased our Divine Master to remove
from our midst" etc., followed by
Therefore, be it resolved that in the
death Of Mr.. Snaggletooth society has
lost valued member, his family a
kind and indulgent husband and faith.
err and so on, ad infnitum, one would
believe that veritable saint had been
carried Vfi by disease, yet the individ.
ual in question Is usually very ordi.
nary individual. During life he has
never been guilty Of exciting any spe-
cial admiration in the mind af any
body; sometimes it happens that he
was heartily detested; yet it is all the
same.


This senseless and ridiculous custom
is usually the reverse of what il is in
tended to be; for, from its very un.
truthfulness, il becomes a mockery Of
the dead. We have read some of these
same resolutions which we're sufficient.
ly startling to have made the corpse
rise from the grave and say, You lie!"


The old adage Of "speak nothing
but good of the dead" is well enough;
but it doesn't follow that some body |
must dash into print about a remarka-
blequality the deceased never possessed.


One instance we recollect was a man
who never entered Gods house,
who swore fearfully. and was
disliked by his neighbors; yet he was
described as an "Israelite in whom
was no guile, and whom to know was
but to love-"


The thing has become so general that
the public is accustomed to read these
of white lies without sur
prise and even to accept them, know
ing the whole thing to be a gaudily-
dressed not-so.


In some instances, of course. il is
due deceased person, but not often.


The custom is nuisance and bore
and one that should be done away
with; yet, if it must exist, do adopt
some form other than the one that ia
now and has been in use since the days
of Adam Elizabethtown News.
Year: 1878

One Of the curious incidents apropos


Of the intense interest which some Of


our ladies felt in this municipal con.


test came 10 the surface this morning.


A young lady, who fit her power over


the man whom she had promised to


wed, exacted from him a promise to


vote for Augustus schell sm Mayor


when she knew that his convictions


were in favor Of another candidate.


Having made this compliance test


Of his affection for her, he was ohedi.


ent to her command, and cast his vote


for the nov defeated man. As the


result proved, his single vote was Of


no avail to poor schell, but it elected


himself to longer life Of single com.


fort and its economies than he had be.


fore proposed to himself, This morn
ing the young lady received the fol.
lowing note:-- q. ~


"MY DEAR Miss L.:--You made
surrender of my honest sense of duty a
test Of my afectiou for you, and you
triumphed, or at least you supposed
you did. This morning my cast-of
manhood has returned to me, begged
of my conscience a reinstatement, and
it has been accepted. Now the same
sentiment demands a restoration Of
my self respect, and ] can only find il
in complete REIMBURSEMENT from my
engagement to a woman whose beauty
is superior to her justice and to her
wonanlines.. IL am severe, pray |
forgive me. Ifyou can appreciate sll
that have suffered in consequence Of
the late violation Of my sense Of duty


"a violation which you demanded of
me--you will pardon and release me
without hesitation. Your estimate of
honor and my own are at too marked
variance to enable us 20 be happy to-
gether. Respectfully and faithfully
your friend, c. F. BLANK.


The young lady just fetched me the
above letter. and permitted me to
copy Il because she considered ie
words an insult and an outrage, aud
she is almost raving mad with blind
anger. She says that meanness and
of spirit prompted its
words, but well, | am much older
than the recipient of the letter, and
years make vast difference in ones
opinions, you know. OF course we
are to have an unpleasant social sensa
Iion, because the parties are both well
known, and tl.eir engagement has been
made public. There does
not seem to be chink in his letter
through which etmetion can creep;
but men are such peculiar creatures,
L pity makes the slightest demands
upon them, that | refuse to predict
the result of meeting between them.
-TNew York letter in the Chicago
Times.
Year: 1878

The following graceful and eloquen,


sketch ofa virtuous old man is from


the Southern novel. abraham Page:


at Is fine sight to see an old man


whose heart still beats with generous
emotion; whose cares have not made


him selfish; whose vicisssitudes have
but made his charity more gentle and
universal.


81 once knew such a man, and he
stands alone in my memory. BY hon
est industry he had raised himself
above the thousand evils Of want, and
he was revered by the all the country
around for his wisdom, learning and
humble piety. No excesses had vast.
ed his power, and though age had
somewhat unstrung the high tension
of his organization. his gray hairs
crowned a body still erect and ener.
getic, and covered a brain still TEEN.
ing with cheerful thought. l often
saw him look with smile Of tenderest
love upon the truthful wife of his
youth, now wrinkled, to whom many
years before, when he first clsspsd her
in his warm embrace, he had made
VOWS of love he had never broken.


STANDING with her, and surround
ed by the amiable and intelligent chill.
dren with whom they had been bless
ed. he could look to heaven and say
with the deepest gratitude and love,
"Behold me and those thou hast given
me-"


"The old man is dead now, and his
bid wife has joined him, and ID seems
to me he had reached grandeur of
human dignity the greatest worldly
honors would but lessen"
Year: 1878

One of the fashionable sins of the
day is lying. Lying, in fact, has got
to be almost trade. Fashionable
women send word To the caller at the
door that they are not in, and know
that they lie when they do so. A
good many protesting Christians In
this city and neighborhood have re-
Gently failed for about ten cents on
the dollar, stating that they could pay
no more, when they could, and they
lied in stating they couldn't, We
know of young man, a clerk IA a
large dry goods house in this city, who
was discharged because he would not
misrepresent about piece of cloth,
and his employer who wanted him to
lie is deacon in the church. II is as
tonishhg how many liars and hypo-
critics creep into the church. They
should be siited out. - Tx.
Year: 1878

Horace Greely struck the keynote
of political and business success, when
he said that the darkest day in any
mans career is that wherein lie fancies
there is some easier way of getting
dollar than by earning it.
Year: 1878

A swarm of bees took possession of
the chimney of Middlefeld Conn. }
Methodist church during the Summer.
and when fire was kindled in the
stove on a recent Sunday the floor of
the church basement literally flowed
with honey.
Year: 1878

THE YoUSG ADvocATE.-A Ken
lucky paper remarks that the look Of
intelligence assumed by the young
lawyer as he sits in Court should be
put a stop to. 1t is calculated to
cause the presiding Judge to lose con-
fdence in himself-to make him be-
lieve he doesn't know any thing.
Year: 1878

Iu Washington the son of promin
ent statesman sent this letter to a
young lady:


"Dear Miss-I want you TO come
around to our house if yon can't get
any body to come around to your house
and fetch you around to our house I
will go around to your house and
fetch yon around to our house. The
young lady is said to have been saying
10 have said that she was saying that
she was said to have said that she said
-syiog, thar Is TO have said, that she
aid she said she was about to say that
]. he vas about coming around to our
l5nse. Oh nix come our house, any
New York Herald.
Year: 1878

from The Dalton Enterprise-


4 lady from near Sungar Valley,
Ga, says that man was blowing in
The field a week or so ago, during
which be utterd the wish that God
would have to plow iu the heat of the
sun as be was forced to do Immedi-
ately upon uttering these words he
topped still. as if turned to stone, and
II is positively asserted that he was
rooted to the spot aud two horses fail
Cd to pull him away. He was still
here when last heard from.
Year: 1878

Dr.. BLACKBURN has been among
US, and has made many friends in the
Purchase during the past two months
by his social manners and fine conver'
sationaI powers The people Of this
section are divided in their choice for
Governor between Judge Bigger and
Judge Lindsay, but nothing much Is
doing in that line, as the election is so
far in the future The pent up fires
will soon commence burning briskly
Year: 1878

Aples have had better inquiry. but command higher
IN fact when the additional of storing
them are taken eonsdeTat they are doing hardly
well as week The market for Cr3nberres ~
onst there q hight shipping demand nearly all
og se been ed by the Western crop and
The cy demand satisfied receivers do
not talk very firm. Oranges improving In quality, and
at the advance Some extra lots ceed
our figures. Quotations:
Year: 1878

"JoHS PHOENIX. the original humor-
ist. being one night at the theater,
fancied be saw friend somo three seats
In front Of him. Turning to his front
neiehbor. he said: "would you DO
kind enough TO touch that gentleman
with your stick" Certainly" was
the reply; and the thing WAS done; but
when the individual thus assaulted
turned round Phoenix saw he was not
the man he took him for. aud became
at once absorbed in the play. leaving
his friend with the stick to settle the
matter with tho gentleman in front.
which, as he hal no excuse handy. was
not done without considerable trouble.
When the hubbub was over the victim
said. "You told me TO tap that man
with q stick" "Yes." "And what
did you want," 81 wanted to see
whether you would or not"
Year: 1878

Domesticated horses have no real
knowledge of their own strength and
power, fortunately for man. With wild
horses it is different. In the steppes of
Russia it is not rare to see two-year
old colt rush singly to attack band of
four or FIVE wolves, kill one or two of
of them, lame the rest, and spread the
terror of his name throughout the
country. The wild horse strikes with
his fore feet like the stag, and not with
his hind legs, as it Is popularity be-
lleved. He draws himself up to his
full height against his enemy, and
pounds him beneath his murderous
pestles; then seizes him between the
shoulders with his formidable incisors
and tosses him to his mates, to make
sport for themselves and their Off
springs.
Year: 1878

Blessed is the man who minds his
own business and attends to his own af-
fairs, and not the affairs of his neigh
Dor.


Blessed is the woman who never says
to her husband, 81 told you so."


Blessed is the man who can sew on
his own buttons when the baby is cry
ing.


Blessed is the woman who won't
marry a widower-providing he's your
father.
Blessed is the mother-in-law who
never reminds you that you married
above your station.


Blessed is the rich relation who never
looks down on you-when you are in
the gutter.


Blessed is the poor relation who new
er looks up to you-for money.


Blessed is the old maid that don't hate
old people and children.


Blessed is the old batchelor that don't
A'Mate cats and canary birds.
llessed are the married people that
PIT wish they were single.
~ Blessed are the single people that
Pare contented to remain so.


Blessed is the husband who never
says his mothers pies were better than
his wife's are.
Year: 1878

nOUSEWORK.-Arc respectable young woman


TO do general hOusework In small family or would 20
by the day week month good references Call for two
DAYS at 304 West 4Othst Wages no object.
Year: 1878

has been secured, and It is conf
IDENTIFY anticipated the whole can
and will be secured within the time limited
in the above dates. An agent of the com.
pany is to commence operations to-day,
looking to the completion Of this part Of the
business, and it is to be hoped the efforts of
the company will be met with the proper
spirit on the part of those who have not yet
granted the right of way.
Year: 1878

Well now there is another request we
have made of our generally amiablr
neighbor the editor Of the Gazette which
he will not grant. We asked as h"
was United States Marshal at the time
Mr.. Martin the newly elected Congress
man from Delaware,is said to have been
psrdoned, to explain and tell us what
he knew about it, but instead OF telling
us in two or three words whether or
not Col. Martin is pardonrd, b. accuses
us of trying to teach him politics and
how to write letters. He says al 40 that
brevity is the soul Of wit, and in Off
cial matters the soul of wisdom. Well,
we reckon it is, but for the life OF us we
cannot see what that has to do with
Col. Martins pardon. Putting into
practice the editors maxim that ''brev-
itv is the soul of witt he might have
told us in one line ''Yes, he is par.
doned," or if the contrary is the case
"He is not" There would have bee Il
brevity at least, but as the editor has
seen fit neither to say one or the other
and As the dockets of the court have NJ
record of the pardon having been grant
cd. 1t is strong presumptive evidence
and that Col. Martin is ineligible Il
the Office to which he has been elected
However We call upon the editor OF the
Gazette again, briefly and wittily as ht
pleasss, to inform the public whether he
ever received pardon for Col. Martin,
and if he did why is it not recorded on
tn. Dockets of the U. s. District Court
for the District OF Delaware, where the
conviction took place. The people are
more anxious to know whether a Con-
pressman was elected OH the Fifth OF
November, than to have dissertations
on the manner and mode of writing let
ters.
Year: 1878

Beer drinkers who think that they
drink nothing but pure mat beer will
BE- sonev hat surprised when they find
to what an extent the adulteration Of
beer has been carried on at some OF the
beer breweries in the county, and that
the pure barley and hop beer they
have been drinking is after all only
manufactured from rice and corn. Beer
manufacturers are human like other
people and the sharp competition carried
on between them often leads to law
suits in which the true inwardness of
the manufacturing of beer is exposed,
and the brewers of 81. Louis are especi-
ally vulnerable in this respect. Ro
chester, Cincinnati and Milwaukee, are
all credited with the production Of a
very superior article of beer, but in a
recent suit between the brewers of St
Louis, it was given in evidence that
often hops and barley formed very
small portion Of the ingredients that
60 to produce these famous brands O
beer.


1t was also given in evidence that
nearly every brewery in Milwaukee
consumed immense quantities Of rice
and corn. One large firm used seventy
| five thousand bushels of the latter grain
monthly, while as much as fifteen
thousand pounds OF rice are consumed
in other establishments during the
same time. In Germany, where a gov
errmrnt supervision is exercised over
the manufacture of beer, such adulter
ations are lot permitted. Here, where
man may put into his manufactured
drinks what he pleases, the beer drink
er often gets what he does not bargain
for, and many a man who has a Lar-
ticular fondness for Milwaukee tipple,
little dreams he is imbibing Hoosier
corn and South Carolina rice instead OF
fine hops and pure barley malt.


1t is the boast Of beer drinkers that
the popularity of beer is owing to the
ddulerations of the whiskies, brandies
and wines, bnt now that some of
the most famous beers used in the
country are shown to be nothing more
than corn and rice juice, there will
have to he change of argument, and
we are awaiting anxiously to hear what
the argument will be.
Year: 1878

In CARRYING out the delaware plan
the Democrats have succeeded in pre-
venting 10000 votes from being cast in
the State, that would have been cast
had there been honest election laws and
honest men to enforce them. That gap
of 10, 900 missing voters is now the
ghost that troubles the Democratic con.
science. 1t makes the late victory look
even ghastIy, though won by the lar
gest majority ever given before for Il g
Democracy. We would suggest to our
troubled Democratic friends that they
send a committee down to South Caro-
lima, to get complete knowledge Of the
tissue paper ballot system OF voting
and then that ugly gap Of 10, 600 could
be filled up, and such papers as the b.
Z. and Ga=ette could herald forth a full
vote cast, and that the Republicans
came up by the hundred and voted the
Democratic ticket.
Year: 1878

IT is NOT likely that Fernando "od d
will press his anti-tarif hill with
much vigor, since he has had such a
narrow escape from defeat by tariff op-
ponent. This has completely taken the
starch out of the great free-trader and
we may now expect him to bs as gen.
tie az lamb.
Year: 1878

The Gazette is becoming an "artful
dodg r" Il lodges the question as to
whether Col Martin was pardOned or
not, and it lodges the question As to
whether It did not oppose the election
of the late Republican candidate for
Mayor, on the ground that he would
want an increase of police force. We
call upon the Gazette for the third time
to answer "yes" or "no." Either word
will surely be brief enough for him.
Year: 1878




BE severe TO yourself. and indulgent
To others; you will thus avoid all re-
sentiment.


.rhe wise man makes equity and
Justice the basis Of all his conduct.
The right forms the rule of his be-
hayior; Difference and modesty make
his exterior. sincerity and fdelity
serve him for accomplishment.


Love virtue. and the people will
be virtuous; the vi,tue Of q great man
is like the wiad: the virtue of the
humble is like the grass: when the
wind passes over it the grass inclines
its head


Children should prsctic fiiial piety
at home. and fraternal Difference abroad:
they should he attentive in their act
ions. sincere and true IN their words,
loving with oil the whole force OF their
affections


"Return equity and iu'ic t"r evil
done you. and pay goodness by good
ness


Without the virtue OF humility. one
can neither he honest in poverty, nor
centepted in abundance


Real virtue consists in integrity of
Year: 1878

heart and loving your neighbor a,
yourself


what | desire that Others should
not do to me, equally desire not TO do
to them


Think not Of faults committed !,
the past, when one has reformed his
conduct
Year: 1878

clamorous for his candidacy. II 80 this is,
no doubt, for the reason that he Is
SO young disciple to that faith that
his sacrifice will not challenge
Us much regret rs an older Offering Thus
far, since the Senator attempted to ride two
horses as financial duplicate, he has made
very awkward work Of IL, for the reason
that his views and opinions are not well
balanced, and he topples badly in his move
ments.


Now, it is evident that Senator THURMAN
hns more sense on this question than all his
retainers and parasites put together He
forcsees the insurmountable and unavoida-
bic fact that his party will not, for the rea-
son that II cannot, carry the State of Ohio
in the next contest for Governor. The Re-
publican party is unified in remarkable
degree, and will enter the campaign with
out discorlant feeling or element to di-
vide and weaken its strength, and when
that is exerted unitedly the State is de-
cidedly Republican. This the Senator sees
and understands, and IL Is cruel to press
him into position of peril against his bet
ter Judgment.
Year: 1878

As an instance of the dirty methods
adopted by the opponents of Senator HOWE
to secure his defeat at the approaching Sena-
torial election in Wisconsin, may be men,
toned the story which some of them are at
tempting TO circulate in that State to the
effect that the Senator is opposed to the
adoption by the Government OF any site for
the proposed new Library building other
than Judiciary Square, and that his opposi-
tion is due TO the fact that his son-in-law is
q large owner of real estate in the neighbor-
hood of that square. As a matter of curl
osity we have taken the trouble TO invcsti-
gate this story, and we find: First, that
Mr.. HOWE has urged upon the attention OF
Congress several other sites in preference to
the Judiciary Square; and second, that
neither the Senator, his son-in-law, nor any
member of his family are owners of a foot OF
real estate in the neghborhood of Judiciary
Square, nor have they ever been. Will the
gentle youth who invented this canard lie
awake u little longer next time and inven,
something more plausible?
Year: 1878

IT is intimated that WmITELAw READ
desires the Mission to Berlin, but we do not
believe it, lie is too useful and well satis-
fled in his prcsem; position TO seek one
abroad. lie has won more reputation and
honor from his cipher telegram achieve
ments and brought more dismay to the
Democrats than lie could in Berlin for hall
4 century