Year: 1877

Written for the Citizen.i


l Be rigid in your criticisms of
all he may do or say. Never let an
opportunity slip to find fault with
him; and if you have good chance
give him a cut; it will help him to
be humble. If it should wound his
feelings, and make his heart bleed,
it Is no difference; he is only min
lister, and he dare not resent it. AS
the brave always oPpress those in
their po,Oer, it is all right


2. Make him responsible for all
the hard times, and oppression in
the country-for failures in busi-
ness &c. Ifyou should subscribe to
build, or repair a church, or par
sonage, take that amount from the
amount you formerly paid your
pastor, it is all the same TO him.


If you do not prosper in bust.
ness, as you expected, don't pay
your pastor anything, or but very
little, he will live, and If he and his
family should suffer, it's no matter,
he is only a minister. If times
get hard and money scarce, and
you find it necessary to cut down
expenses, begin to retrench by
Withholding from your minister the
amount you formerly paid. Go on
with other expenditures as before;
buy everything you need for your
wardrobe, but let your minister
and family scratch it out as best
they can. Then go to church on
Sunday, and if you want your
preacher to make a good effort,
turn your side to him and look out
of the window, or stare around over
the house, and yawn, or take nap,
or vince under what he says. And
when he has preached twenty min
utes, lest those sitting near you arc
not aware that you are very fastid-
ious, and hard to interest, pull out
your watch to see how long he has
been boring you. Then with an
air of dissatisfaction show your ut
ter contempt for him. If he should
happen to see you, and feel
troubled, SO much the better, for
he dare not say anything about it.


3. If your pastor happens not to
be the style of man you fancy,
make that an excuse for with hold
ing his pay. Don't pay him any,
thing, for as he had the making of
himself and knew too just what kind
of man you liked before the job was
put up, he ought to have made him
self to your liking. But as he did
not, starve him for it.


4. If you pay anything to his
support at all, do it when it is most
convenient for you, no matter how
much trouble and inconvenience it
may cause him, he ought to be very
glad if he gets it at all. If he is
forced to make accounts, or let his
family suffer, charge him full price,
or little more. AS he makes his
money easy and always has plenty
of it, he can afford to pay the high
est price for what he gets.


Then, if you should get hard up
and need a little money, of course
dun your preacher first, and talk
very plainly to him if he does not
pay at once. Then go around and
talk to the brethren about the ex
travagance of the preacher; get very
jealous for the character of the
Church, and say / fear our preacher
will not be able to pay out, DC.


D. If you are a poor man don't
think of paying anything. But if
your pastor should get you. to do
any work for him, charge him full
price, and require payment as soon
as the work Is done. And on ac
count of the demands upon him he
wears little finer clothes than you
do, hate him for it, say he is proud,
and you don't like him nohow.


6. Don't ever pay, or give him
any thing, and yet, say, "why of
course II thought our preacher and
his family were doing well-had an
abundance of everything" If the
Sunday in course for collection
comes, and you do not go to Church,
which you are not apt to DO, don't
send in your mite for a months
time, for your pastor and his fami-
ly to be without bread is but a
small matter.


Z. Never call on your pastor to
know whether he is in need of any
thing or not, and if he is forced to
90 to you for assistance, look sour
and grum, and say: 81 hate to be
always annoyed by preacher who
is eternally in want of something.
| paid him five or ten dollars six or
eight months ago, and now he is
wanting more money. am in fa-
vor of cheaper preacher myself"


RESULTS.


L. BY adopting the above you
may reasonably expect high mind
ed, efficient ministry.


2. You will be as certain of Abra-
hams bosom, when you depart this
life, as Dives, or any other such fel
low. K PLURIBUs USUM.