Year: 1877

CHAPTER III.


MURDER on BoARpw


| worked my way to Melbourne on
foot, boarding my money, as If in
some vague way il was going to assist
me in my purpose. Heaven help me
with my purpose. In the morning |
was resolute and confident | would
get back to London; on the voyage /
would set down all that l could re-
member, to the smallest detail-every
little fact of that happy by-gone time
before this evil thing fell upon me.
No doubt should find clew at last
somehow / would follow it up, step by
step, till my proofs accumulated to ir-
resistible evidence. lpictured myself,
under the glamour of that bright sun
shine of Australia, standing before the
prosperous devil who had done the
dead-he was always prosperous and
happy in my dreams-and dragging
him before justice. | was myself
standing before the cid NANNY
benefactor-denouncing his readiness
to believe, his unrelenting persecution
when he did believe; always hurrying
onward full and complete revenge,
till not one Of those who had had
hand in my unmerited ruin should re-
main without his share of cup Of
bitterness.


In the night saw things In their
grim reality. l saw how weak l was,
| saw the hopelessness Of my task, and
| foresaw how was to creep back to
my native country, pardoned, it is
true, for good conduct, but branded
till death with the gallows-tree mark
of forger and thief. And at such a
time l was willing to go back to my
prison, and serve out the rest of my
life in the apothecary's room.


Lurid hope that seemed golden, or
dark despair, it mattered nothing, be-
cause in hope OF despair my miserable
life was before me-life stretches long
before the eyes at twenty-five-and it
had to be got through somehow.


Always in those days tho thought OF
myself and my wrongs! The wrong
was SO great, the ruin so overwhelm-
ing, that there was no room left in my
mind for any other feeling. For in
stance, arrived in the colony of Vic
toria i'm the days when the whisper OF
gold was running like wild-fire through
its scattered hamlets and along its
giant sheep-runs; but when other
mems nerves thrilled at the chance OF
boundless wealth waiting to be picked
! up, listened coldly. Again, to this
day have no sense or recollection OF
wha, the country was like through
which toiled alone, from station to
station, in my resolution to get to the
place where my face at least, If not my
name, should be unknown. ! know |
walked through wild and savage dis
tricts, where there were dangers OF
thirst, dangers Of reptiles, and dangers
of treacherous natives. ! believe that
| sometimes slept out for days to-
gethcr. ! know that was always
alone, except that sometimes friend
ly shepherd in an up-country station
gave me tea and damper. What ii
was like, that great continent through
which journeyed on foot, can not
say, because | walked along with open
eyes which saw not, ears which never
any thing. Only, ~ said before, the
light and sunshine witched me into
confidence, which the darkness tore
away. And the agony was like the
agony of Prometheus when the eagle
tore away his liver.


think in those days ! must have
been mad; for if had not been mad
l must have known that there was
still one heart somewhere in England
beating with love for me, one voice
going up in prayer for me day and
night. But If thought of Ruth at all
it was to remember how my ruin was
hers, and II made me more fiercely
mad.


I was not difficult at Melbourne to
get ship bound for London. The
harbor was full of ships whose crews
had deserted and gone off to the gold
fields. Now and then the captains
had deserted their ships as well. They
all seemed bound for London, because
the port of Melbourne was then very
little place, and its trade was small
| the trouble was that there were nc
crews to carry back the ships. had
to cast about and wait. / was the only
man, l believe, in all that colony who
neither looked to find gold for himself
| in the diggings, nor tried to make
money out of those who were starting
for the diggings.


| After a few weeks of restless wait
ing-each day that kept ME from a
visionary revenge was a day lost
discovered that vessel would proba-
bly, sail Immediately. | got this in.
4


formation, in an indirect way, from q
man whose business it was to plunder
the diggers at starting. He was a
great scoundrel, remember, and
used to compare him, piling up money
hand over hand by dishonest tricks
and cheatings, with myself, the re-
leased felon of a blameless life. HI
asked me no questions, either where
/ was from or whittier | was going
| He took the money for my board, anG
he bade me hold myself in readiness
for start; and one day l get tht
word, and went on board the clipper
sailing vessel Lucy Derrick, boune
from Melbourne to London. l was I
steerage passenger-the only one, be
cause no other poor man in his senses
would leave Melbourne at such time
There was only one saloon passenger
and she was young lady; of cours'