smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1866

We know that men naturally shrink from
the attempt to obtain companions who are their
superiors; but they will find that really intel
igent women, who possess the most desirable
qualities, are uniformly modest, and hold their
charms in modest estimation. Donot imagine
that any disappointment in love which takes
place before you are twenty-one years old will
be any material damage to You. The truth is,
that before man is twenty-five years old, he
does not know what he wants himself. The
more of a man you become, and the more man
illness you become capable of exhibiting in your
association with women, the better wife you
are able to obtain; and one years possession
of the heart and hand of really noble woman
is worth nine hundred and ninety-nine years
possession of sweet creature with two ideas
in her head and nothing new about either Of
them.
Year: 1866

The farmer sat in his easy chair,


Smoking his pipe OF clay,
While his hale old wife, with busy care,


Was clearing the dinner away
A sweet little girl. with fine blue eyes,
On her grandlather's knee was catching Hes
The old man placed his hand on her head,


With a tear on his wrinkled face
He thought how often her mother, dead,


Had sa; long ago in that place.
A. the tear stole down from his hs.fshut eve,
Don't smoke" said the child; chow u MAKES


you cry"
The house-dog slumberd upon The floor,


Where the sun, after noon, would steal;
The busy wife, by the open door.


Was turning the spinning -wheel;
And the old brass clock on the mantletres
Had plodded along to almost three!
Still the farmer sat in his easy chair,


While close 10 his heaving breast
The moisten'd brow and the head so fair


Ofhis dear grandchild were pressd.
His frosty locks mid her soft hair lay
Fast asleep were they both, on that summer Cay!
Year: 1866

Is there any position mother can covet for
her daughter, more glorious than to be tho
wife of an honest, Independent, happy farmer,
in country like this? To be the wife of ono
who is looked up to by the neighbors as one
whose example may be safely followed-one
whose farm is noted far and near as model OF
neatness and perfection ofcultivation To bo
mistress of mansion of her own, that may be
the envy of every passer-by, because it is neat
and comfortable-a sweet and lovely home p
To be the angel that fits through the garden.
bidding the flowers bloom, and twining roses
and honeysuckes around the bed room, or
sweetning their fragrance with her sweetest
smile: or spreading the snowy cloth beneath
the old oak at the door to welcome her husband
as he returns from his toll or ever tipping tho
cradle with her foot as she plies the dasher
with her hand, or busily moves the needle, at
the same time humming joyous song OF praise
that She is the happy and fondly beloved wlfo
of an American farmer-one Of the true noble
men of this country-one that should 10y right.
rank as the pride and glory of America.-C0'-
mans Rural.
Year: 1866

Subsoil plowing furnishes strong evidence
of the value of deep plowing Should corn DO
planted in a subsoiled field, the corn viii DO
darker in color and increased in height, and az
a sequence the yield will be greater.


How absurd to attempt to cultivate moro
land than you can manage. 1t is time thrown
away. It is better to till twenty screS well
than one hundred in slovenly manner.


There are only two things worth looking at
in horse-action and soundness; for never
saw critter" that had good action and was
bad beast.


Make farmers of your boys, and you will
have the satisfaction Of seeing them honest, in
dependent and respectable members Of society.


If your hogs ere sick give them ears Of corn
FIRST dipped in tar and then rolled in sulphur.


In all composts intended for light sandy soils,
clay IS one of the most valuable ingredients
that can possibly be used.


Kingbirds that there is so much said about,
only eat the drones, or stingless bees. Hence
think that instead Of an injury to the beehive
they are a blessing, assisting the workers in
ridding themselves Of loafers that eat and labor
not.


When grasshoppers are 50 plenty as to mako
pastures poor, turkeys grow fat.


Onions finely chopped and mixed with In
dian meal and fed to fowls onceor twice week,
prevent the gapcs and many other diseases that
fowls are subject to.
Year: 1866

At social party, wag found himself, in
the course of the evening, in conversation with
a nervous looking stranger. Pointing out to
him a man of an inquiring turn of mind, in
another portion of the room, he said:


"Do vou see that man there ? lie has
mania-a very unpleasant one, too. He is pos
sessed with the idea thathe must bite Of stran-
gers cars, and it has caused dreadful amount
of trouble. do not know whether he will
show any symptoms tonight, but, perceiving
YOU are a stranger, deemed it my duty to put
you on your guard Don't let him approach
very near you"


The expression of horror that spread over
the face of the nervous man, clearly proved
that he had heard the warning. a little later
the benevolent informant got an opportunity
to tell the inquiring man that that man point
ing out the individually was physical wonder,
as a roaring noise could be distinctly heard pro-
ceeding from his ear by getting within eighteen
inches of him. Our curious friend was struck
with this unheard of phenomenon, and very
properly began to work himself close enough
for personal investigation. The movement
was seen by the nervous man, and great drops
of oppressive sweat oozed out from his brow
and trickled down his checks Nearer and
nearer approached the one, and more ter
ribly intense grew the horror of the other
The space between them was slowly but surely
lessening. The curious man was within an ace
of the roaring, whenth agony ofthe 'roarer"
reached its crisis, and, clinching his fist, he
landed it between the "lookers" of the unfor-
tunate searcher after physical wonders, shout
ing at the top of his voice:


'Bite off my ears, will you?"


The effect of this on the astonished audience
may be imagined.
Year: 1866

A lawyer of fluid tendency was discussing
some nice point of law, and getting ont of pa
tience at the inability Of the court to take his
own view of it, said the intellect of the court
was so dark flash of lightning could not pen
citrate it. The Judge being newcomer, and
not knowing the peculiarities and failing of
the man, imposed severe punishment on him
for contempt of court. Some of the lawyers
friends stated the case to his honor, and the
punishment was RENTED on the condition that
he should publicly apologize to the court. He
was accordingly brought up the next morning,
and made amends by saying:


81 regret very much that | said, in the heat
of the moment, that the intellect of the court
was so dark lightning could not penetrate it.
I guess it could; It's a rery penetrating thing"
Year: 1866

An easy way Of preserving milk or cream
sweet for long time, or Of removing the sour
ness when it has already come on, is TO add to
ii small quantity Of common soda, pcarlash
or magnesia. So il is said.
Year: 1866

A gentleman who recently paid visit
to famous pigeon roost in West Vir-
ginia, describes it as one Of the most
interesting sights ever witnessed. He
says:


We arrived on the ground about sun.
down, and had not to wait more than hall
an hour until the advance guard com
menced coming in, which continued un-
til we grew weary, and began to inquire
If they we're not almost all in, our pilot
assuring us they had hardly commenced.
By.and-by the squads began to increase
in numbers, and becoming more frequent,
until finally they swelled into q vast
cloud, which almost obscured the heav-
ems above us from our view, and flowed
down the ravine in O perfect stream,
without any cessation, for upward of an
hour, accompanied by a noise like the
flowing of mighty river. We were
amazed-bewildered-and requested our
brother hunter to hold our hat while we
would, with open mouth and eyes, and
wide extended arms, take in the scene
above us. Finally the rear guard came
up, and by the time they had all found
resting place, every tree, and bush, and
twig was bending beneath their weight,
resembling, more than any thing else we
can call to mind, swarm OF bees set
Ting upon the limbs Of a tree. The
ground was covered with limbs broken
by their weight We noticed trees as
thick as mans wrist broken and bent
to the earth, and saw othesr entirely up
rootad r....... Hr" .U
Year: 1866

Brigham Young, of Utah, has been
blowing up the women of that free-and.
easy territory in manner at once awful
and unique. He accuses them of "whin-
ing" and says that they must either
stop that sort of nonsense or else start
for the other side of Jordan, at once
and he tells his own forty wives that he
means THEN, as we'll as the rest Of the
feminine Utahyans. He says that the
kernel of the whole dificulty--the occa-
sion of the disngresabe and unbearable
winnings lies in the fact that the
women expect too much Of the Saints y
He says that the women-even his own
forty-are so weak.minded as to suppose
that the sanity elders of the Mormon Is
rael can make heaven on earth for them
and that after a woman has entered a
Saints family, and finds that after all he
is not able to make a heaven on earth
for her, she begins to whine and talk
about "too many wives" and the "evils
of polygamy," and such like blasphe-
nous twaddle." Brigham also says it Is
his opinion that any woman who ever
lived would be disappointed in the best
Saint" in Utah, should she marry him
and on this point We unreseFvedly
agree with Brigham, The GovernoSgave
ali the women warning that two weeks
from date OF his sermon against whin-
ing" he should call upon them either to
promise never to "whine more. or else
TO leave the Territory bag and baggage,
saving that be would even send of all his
own wives, and 90 TO heaven alone,
sooner than to take such whining "
crew along with him. We shall await
the next news from Utah with deep in
faract
Year: 1866

At tho Industrial Exhibition In the
Agricultural Hall, Islington, London,
there is shown an ingenious invention
by which the action of a shower of
rain is made to close an open window.
The window, when opered, stretches
two India-rubber springs. These springs
are prevented from drawing the
window down by means Of a curved
rod fixed outside the sash, the end OF
which works up and down in tubular
bell.mouthed stand on the window-sill
A little piece Of loaf sugar is inserted
into the mouth Of the stand, and the end
of the rod is let down gently upon it,
The sugar prevents the rod descending
into the tube, aud of course keeps the
window sash up. As soon as il begins to
rain, the bell mouth OF the tube collects
the drops, the sugar is melted, and no
further obstacle being presented to the
action Of the India-rubber springs, the
sash is drawn down,
Year: 1866

A local paper, published in the Eng
lish coal districts, the Wakefield Journal,
tells striking story of a wedding in a
village church in the neighborhood,
which well illustrates the ignorance Of
the lower classes of Great Britain:


The bridegroom was miner, and was
evidently one of the most ignorant of
his class, and his intended spouse was
one in the same station in life. The
ceremony proceeded uninterruptedly
until the question was put, wilt thou
have this woman to be thy welded wife?'
At this point the man turned round to the
woman, and, to the intense horror of the
officiating minister, coolly asked her,
"Wi ia clean mi BOOTS 2" The bride
vouchsafed no answer to this interroga-
ton, although repeated three times, each
time with greater emphasis and force,
before the clergyman recovered from his
surprise, and ordered the fratching
pair out of the edifce. This was an
eventuality as astounding and as unex-
pected to the bridegroom as his own con-
duct had been to the parson, but it had
the effect OF bringing him to his senses,
and he piteously begged of the clerk to
ask the minister to come back, promising
most abjectly to 20 through the eere-
mony "all rect He was nobbat an
ignorant mon" he said, "and didn't nav
he wor doin wrang. The fact wor he
and his missis had had money rumpus
about the boot clesnin' job, and he'd
sworn he'd nee wed her If she didna
promise to fettle en-" The clergyman
was at last induced TO return, and after
reading the couple lecture on the sa-
credness of the ceremony they were about
to go through, and the solemn character
of the building in which they were, pro-
ceeded With the service, and the two were
made one, the "booit controversy be-
ing adjourned sine die. 1t is to be hoped
that when resumed, the "booit " itself
viii not be turned into powerful auxili-
ary in the discussion.
Year: 1866

eyebrows, introduce belladonna into the
eyes in order to enlarge the pupils,
paint blue veins upon the temples, and
use ninon paint and pearl white upon the
rest of the skin. We must change the
hair to a reddish-brown by means of q
corroding material or of palma vecchio,
which is now used in preference for that
purpose; and we must be possessed OF
great skill in applying all these ingredi.
ents, as their use Is universal with the old
as we'll as with the young"
Year: 1866

The Secretary Of the Treasury has under consid.
eration the expediency Of returning to the custom
Of closing his Department at p. m, instead Of 4,
as at present. No Cabinet officer is more assduOul
in the discharge Of his duties than the Secretary o
the Treasury, who Is promptly at bis post at
o'clock, a m, remaining usually until or 0 p,
m. Notwithstanding this fact, he will probably
adopt the six hour system on the lst prOximO until
after the close Of the cheated term" 1t is under
stood that similar change in hours will be made
by the heads of several other Departments of the
Government.
Year: 1866

Established expressly to afford the afflicted sound
and scientific Medical aid, in the treatment
and cure of all Private and Chronic


Diseases, cases Of secrecy, and


all sexual diseases.
Year: 1866

A DISSENTING 0rIyI0N-J. \. Reed NJ. D. OF


Baltimore las published communication in
which he states that the eating OF pork has no.
thing whatever do with the disease known as
trichina. He says - boldly assert that tri-
china never did and never will destroy human
life that they have in all probability ex sted in
the human f.sh always, certainly for the last half
century; and think it fair deduction. taking
it (for the sake of the nrgumentl rs granted thnt
we may receive them through The instrumcntall-
ty of the hog, that they are not more dangerous
to life thar account But the idea that we
receive them thus, is simply ridiculous. Wenrc
not cannihals: do not eat raw meat of any
description and the application of a cooking heat


is certain death to all living animals besides,
the sailing and smoking of pork into bacon is
sure destruction to them. They do not nhabt
the muscle of the hog more than that of any 9TH
er animal, or of man himself. defy any one to
prove by the record of the last thirty-five years,
that n solitary death has been caused, beyond
doubt. by the presence of the irichlna. | assert
that the charges made against these innocent
worms i without the shadow of foundation in
fact and would advise the community, If they
desire to eat pork, to do so, provided they do not
eat il raw or tainted.
Year: 1866

IMPORTANT RuMoR ABOUT BRIGuAM YouYG.-
The Virginia City Union processes TO have got
information that is unquestionably 9 authorta-
tive'' that it is the intention of the great high
priest of the Mormons at Salt Lake City to throw
himself under the protection of Gen. Connor, on
the return of that officer from Washington, and
In case he does great commotion will be kick
ed up in the city of the Saints that will be Sec
oud only to our late internal rebellion.
Year: 1866

The Ax.-The other day was holding
man by the hand-a hand as firm in its
outward texture as leather, and his sunburnt
face was as inHexible as parchment; he was
pouring forth TRADE of contempt on those
who complain that they can get nothing to
do, as an excuse for becoming idle loafers.


Said 1, "Jeff what do you work at? You
look hearty and happy; what are you at ?"


"Why," said he, 60 bought me an ak
three years ago that cost me two dollars
That was all the money had. went to
chopping wood by the cord. l have done
nothing else, and have earned more than
5000; drank no grog, paid no doctor, and
have bought me little farm in the Hoosier
State, and shall be married next week to q
girl who has earned 5000 since she was
eighteen. My old ak l shall keep in the
drawer, and buy me new one to cut my
wood with"


After l left him, thought to myself,
"that Ak and no grog." They are the two
things that make man in this world. How
small capital that ax-how sure of success
with the motto, No grog!' And then q
farm and wife, the best of all.
Year: 1866

TRUTHFUL REMARKs-The New York
Ledger contains the following truthful re-
marks, from the pen of Fanny Fern :" How
often have seen face lettering at q church
threshold, listening to the swelling notes of
the organ, and longing to 60 in, were it not
for the wide social gulf between itself and
those assembled will not say worshipped
there. And 1 Know if the clergyman
inside that church spoke as his Master spoke
when on earth, that he would soon preach to
empty walls. They want husks, and they
get them. l say in my vexation, as the door
swings on its hinges in some poor creatures
face, and he wanders forth to struggle, un-
aided, as best he may with poor mans
temptations. Our Roman Catholic brethren
are wiser. Their creed is not my creed, save
this part of it: That the rich and poor meet
together, and the Lord is the maker of them
all. / often go there to see it. / am glad
when servant drops on her knees in the
aisle and makes the sign of the cross, that
nobody bids her rise, to make way for
silken robe that may be waiting behind her.
am glad the mother of many little children
may drop in for brief moment before the
altar, to recognize her spiritual wants, and
then pass out to the cares she may no longer
lose sight of. / do not believe as they do,
but it gladdens my heart all the same that
one man is as good as his neighbor, at least
there-before God. I breathe freer at the
thought. / can sit in corner and watch
them pass in and out, and rejoice that every
one, how humbly soever, feels that he or she
is that church, just as much as the richest
foreigner, from the cathedrals of the old
world. whom they may jostle in passing
out"
Year: 1866

ANECDOTE OF BIsMARK.-The following
anecdote of Count Bismark is told by the
Paris correspondent of Land and Water, an
English journal:


In 184l Bismark was twenty. six years
old, and had Just passed his civil service ex-
animation. He went to the chief of his de.
partment. and was told to wait in the ante
room. At the end of half an hour he began
t. show symptoms of great irritation ; three
quarters of an hour passed. and he pulled off
his gloves and tore them up. When he had
waited an hour and half he got up, and
was leaving the room, when the gentleman
he had been waiting for opened the door and
asked him what he required. Sir, an hour
and a half ago, l wished to speak with you,
but desire to do so no longer And young
Bismark went away twenty-five years
later, Otto Edward Leopold de Bismark
was First Minister, and paid an official visit
to a certain Prefect. The Minister was
shown into his apartments by the Prefect.
and was about to retire. We'll, SIR said
the Count, you must acknowledge that life
is full of curious changes What does
your Excellencv meanY Il mean that ii
is now twenty three years since saw you
and you are very little changed beg
your Excellency's pardon, but l don't re-
member How said M. de Bismark,
laughing, don't you remember young man
who wss rather impertinent to you when you
were head of Department. The Prefect
became red. green and pale, but the Count
gave him his hand, and no more was said of
the matter.o
Year: 1866

TArE WORMS AND LAGER BEER.-During
the past few months the successful treat
ment for the tape worms in this city has
been the subject of newspaper notice and
compliment, says the La Crosse Democrat,
although these ugly customers are very fre
quently dislodged by appropriate prescrip-
tions. But now professional aid is unneces.
sary, the practitioner must seek new fields
of conquest to gain notoriety cowhage, tur-
pentine, mercury and all the drastic and dis
agreeable drugs SO often prescribed for tape
worm must be ignored. Lager Beer, that
much abused beverage, has proved itself
equal to the emergency. A prominent citi-
zen of Vernon county, whose health for a
number of years had, at times, been serious
ly impaired, recently exhibited symptoms
inducing him to believe that worms was the
cause of his sufferiugs. Philosopher like, he
eschewed food for three days and drank
mott ing but lager been Having thus tasted
and freely INDUCED in lager for the time
named. be had the satisfaction of witnessing
the result of his prescription in the expulsion
OF large tape worm measuring over thirty
feet This fact is worth the attention of
medical men by whom tape worms are look
ed upon as so difficult to master, and the
successful treatment for which has been
deemed worthy of especial notice. And as
for lager beer whether Intoxicating or not.
as a remedy for tape worm it will henceforth
g bear the palm" as a medical agent in one
of the most disgusting ailments to which
flesh is heir
Year: 1866

A GENTLEMAN who is engaged in the Tele'
graph expedition in Siberia, relates the fol.
lowing incident in letter to friend in Gin
cinnati Il met with a Korak woman OF
about twenty two years of age, on the great
Tundra, marked Keran on the map,) who
drove a team of reindeers with loaded
sledge, fftv versts in one day, and at night
slept out in the snow. with no covering what
ever except the clothes she had worn during
the day, and in temperature forty three
degrees below zero, or seventy-fve degrees
below the freezing point think Of that
We effeminate ladies of America. That
saw myself, although even to me it seems
incredible now. thought it an extraordi-
nary thing to sleep in reindeer skin tent
out doors in such weather, and l should have
frozen to death in two hours had l attempt
ed to sleep without it. She travelled with US,
driving her own reindeer, and sleeping on
the snow every night"
Year: 1866

In January, 1906, there appeared in him
some symptoms of consumption; and he
would remain immovable, exposed to the
whole heat of the sun, until the skin of his
face began to peel of, and it was necessary
to employ force to drag him into the shade.


In April, exhaustion proceeded rapidly,
laboring in his breast was observed, the
pulse was very slow, and on the morning of
the eighth he expired after short struggle.
Year: 1866

large proportion of the operatives in various
kinds Of shops are not worth $1,000. A wife be-
loved, and confdng children cling with fond regard
to the father liable at any moment to be taken away
with nothing laid by for their comfort and protec-
tion. The annual sum of S25 would pay a life poll
making them comfortable; and who can not lay
aside !or such purpose this small sum, and who
among you ought not to lay it aside? If the family
is poor much the greater need that this wise pro-
vision be not neglected. AS the ordinary accumu
lations necessarily slow, requiring years to lay
aside few hundred dollars, how much wiser to make
sure at once large sum by Life Insurance. Tak'
wnrninp hefnre il Is too late.