Year: 1874

Bill before the house-Wiiliam on the
sidewalk.


The Little Rock Gazette gives Brooks
farewell kick and gratuitously advises
him to go West and grow up with the
country.


Washington Territory is agitated by
the Oriental magniicence of " the first
brick residence ever erected within its
boundaries.


A rag saturated with chlSroform left
around the haunts of mice will exter-
inmate them. They go up to interview
the rag'and stay.


A Springfield man who was arrested
last week for an attempt to commit sui
eide by drowning was appropriately
bailed out by his friends.


The Christian Register says: A
woman who cannot in any emergency
make or repair a garment, has one art
less than Pottawottomie' s squaw.


In view of the embarkation of the
blondes" for Europe, Jones gives vent
to the sentiment that it must be perfectly
natural for them to have their sea legs on.


A bolt of lightning struck Parson
Brownlow's house in Knoxville the other
night, but after finding thst the parson
was absent, it went out by way of the
cellar.


1t may be consoling to know that
Father Secchi, the Italian astronomer,
has discovered that the temperature Of
the suns surface is 580648 degrees
Fahrenheit.


1t has been discovered that the white
gauze wells now worn have an advan-
tage-a woman who powders looks as
respectable behind them as woman
who does not.


At an examination of some girls for
the rite of confirmation, in answer to the
question, What is the outward visible
sign or form in baptism' one of them
replied, THE baby, sir


Some one was talking to NJ. Theirs
about the state Of France. Don't say
France" interrupted the veteran states
man, "call it the Duchy of Magenta. !"
Which was malicious but good


The Burlington Hawkeye inquiries:
what shall it profit young man if he
wear cane, and buttonhole bouquet
as large as a dinner plate, if his optics
are not built to stand pair of spring
eye glassesY


Duluth has lost its daily paper, aud the
ladies from the Zenith City are compelled
to spend half the morning in talking with
each other from second story windows,
to say nothing of the necessity of using
brown paper in their toilettes.


Mr.. S. S. Cox, in his lecture on
American Humor," said that in Thibet
they pull a man by the ear when they
want him to drink. Here, some men ask
you to drink verbally, and then chew
your ear" for a couple OF hours just for
sociability.


Madame Bazaine is said to be active
ly intriguing for restoration of the EN-
pire. 1t is high time indeed that the
Bonapartists had awakened to the fact
that if the imperial purple is ever to be
taken down, busted and put in use again,
it will require the genius Of woman to
do it.


The Dunkards, now in conference at
Girard, Illinois, wear full beard, it not
being permitted to wear mustaches only.
A prolonged discussion took place as to
whether this rule should not be modified,
but the conservative advocates of full
beard triumphed. They also decided
against brethren engaged in the banking
business, and against giving their chill
dren a collegiate education.


A woman confessed to priest that
she was guilty of scandal He gave her
a,ripe thistle top, and told her to scatter
the seed one by one, IN every direction.
She obeyed, and returned after her task
was done. he then ordered her to go
back and collect the scattered seed.
She objected, saying it would be impos-
sible. He replied it would be more i'm
possible to gather up and destroy all the
evil reports which she had circulated
about others.


The Montebello Metternich affair,
which nearly resulted in a duel, is de-
scrioed by the London press as marked
by elaborate and solemn Stiffness
Count Montebelo took occasion to ex-
press his disapproval of the second
empire, under which, however, he had
held office. Meeting the Princess Met
ternich at ball he bowed to her. She
"cut" him and sent him word that in
future he must not recognize her.
Thereupon he challenged her husband,
VINO, however, said he would not be
responsible for the acts OF his wife, and
would not fight on that ground, though
be was quite willing to oblige Montebello
18th n dual on INV othar rrounds So