Year: 1877

7 u
| that Social Procedure.


A bow" says La Fontaine, sis a
note drawn ut sight. You are bound to
acknowledge it Immediately, and TO the
full amount" According to eircum-
stances, it should be respectful, cordial,
civil or familiar. An inclination of the
head is often sufficient between gentle
men, or gesture of the hand under
some circumstances, or the mere touch
ing of the hat; but in bowling to lady
the hat must be lifted. If you know
people slightly, you recognize them
slightly; if you know them well you
bow with more cordiality. The body is
not bent at all in bowling as in the days
of the old school forms of pOliteness !;
the inclination of the head is all that is
necessary.


Ones own Judgment ought to be
sufficient "a to the empressment of the
salutation. In bowling TO a lady, the
hat is only lifted from the head, not
held out at arms length for view of
the interior. If smoking, the gentleman
manages to withdraw his cigar before
lifting his hat; or, should he happen to
have his hand in his pocket, he must
remove il. Gentlemen who are driving
are often embarrassed by bowling ac-
quaintances. They are obliged to keep
a tight hold of the reins. and that is i'm
possible if they remove their hats. A
well-bred foreigner would never dream
of saluting lady by raising his whip
| to his hat.


American gentlemen have adopted
this custom, but it would be still better
if they would set the fashion of bowling
without touching the hat or raising the
hand when occupied by their driving.
Our ideas OF what constitutes pollteness
in such points are entirely controlled by
custom, and if il were an understood
thing that gentlemen who are driving
are not expected TO take off their hats,
the simple inclination of the head, a
trife lower, perhaps, than when the
hat is lifted, will soon be accepted as in
good form by all sensible people. 1t
certainly is more respectful form of
salutation than raising the whip, which
shocks those who have not become hab-
ituated to this modern innovation.


A well-bred person instinctively
bows the moment that he recognizes an
acquaintance, at the instant of the first
meeting of the eyes. According to the
rule of courts, and Of good society
everywhere, anyone who has been in
troduced to you, or any lady to whom
you have been introduced, is entitled to
this mark of respect. A bow does not
entail a calling acquaintance, and TO
neglect it shows a neglect in early edu-
cation, As well as a deficiency in eulti-
yation and i'm the instincts of gentle
man; so that the truth of Saint Loup's
assertion, that the bow is the touch-
stone of good breeding, is made good.
\ gentleman walking with lady re-
turns a bow made to her, lifting his hat
not too far from his head.


II is civility to return bow, al
though you do not know the one who is
bowling to you. The more cultivated
person is, the more prompt he will be
found in such civilities. Either the one
who bows knows you. or has mistaken
you for some one else. In either case,
you should return the bow, and prOba-
bly, the mistake will be discovered to
have occurred from want of a quick
recognition on your own part, or from
some resemblance that you bear to
another. In either case, the bow costs
you nothing, and the Withholding of it
shows you 10 be gauche or rude.
Young people often wait for the recOg-
milton of the elder, having been in
structed by books that it is the place of
the elder to show the first recognition.
No books can replace the training of
parents in such matters, or the instinct
of kind hearts.


The one introduction that entities to
recognition having been once made, it
is the duty of the younger person to
recall himself or herself 10 the recOl-
lection of the elder person by bowling
each time of meeting, until the recog-
milton becomes mutual. As persons ad-
vance in life, they look for these ;.tten-
tions upon the part Of the young, and
it may be in some instances that it is
the only way which the young have OF
showing their appreciation of courte-
sizes extended to them by the old or
middle aged. Those who have large
circles of acquaintance often confuse
the faces of the young whom they meet
and do not know, and from frequent err
rors of this kind they get into the habit
of waiting TO catch some look or ges-
ture of recognition.