smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1878

is clause which sweeps off all pension agen-
cies, and directs all payments after July to
be made to pensioners from the Treasury De
partment, Washington.


This change is made in accordance, we pre-
sumo, with a recommendation made by Secre-
tary Schurz, in his letter Of January Q, 1878,
Senate Mis-. Doc No. 38,


1t has been opposed by Commissioners Bent
ley, as will appear from the same document,
and we are glad to say that the figures and
reasoning given by the Commissioner are, to
our mind, satisfactory on this question, and that
in this instance Mr. Bentley has shown himself
the friend of the many against the few


But it may be that, looking at the subject
from different point of view, we may be able
to present the case in form that shall strike a
class of minds more favorably than from the
point of view of the Commissioners.


There are now eighteen pension agencies. In
these eighteen agencies are employed 100 clerks,
and by the present machinery pensions have
been paid with singular promptness and accu-
racy.


The annual cost of the present system in pay
ing $4,000 pensioners each three months is
1925 900, or not quite dollar for each pen
sioner.


And all these clerks, 100 in number, are held
to longer hours and more dilgent labor than
Government clerks ever have been or ever will
be-


So that it may be assumed that the work
cannot be done in Washington at any Depart
ment with less amount of clerical force, and
it may reasonable be expected that the force of
clerks employed will be greater.


Assuming, however, that the force will be
the same, we have 100 clerks, that will average
81 400 each, and for clerical force alone we must
pay $224,000.


True, it is estimated that the cost of the
changes proposed would be only $l37, ,000 but
this is simply an estimate, and any one who
reads the document referred to will see that the
amount of continuous daily labor required of
clerks under this estimate is almost physical
impossibility.


And yet the Committee on Appropriations,
without any figures to justify it, have, of their
own authority, cut this estimate down to $685.
600, an amount manifestly inadequate to the
service demanded. Now, it is absolutely GER
tain that the service cannot be performed on
that sum of money.


All this argument and statement hitherto has
been considered only on one side of the ques-
tion, that is, on the side of the Government.
But, in reality, this is not the important side.
The purpose and aim of the pension laws is to
give relief promptly and efectually to the pen
sioners, and the expense in so doing is a second
airy consideration.


The essential point to be looked after in pro
posing change is, how it will affect the pen
sioner Let us look at it in that light. There
are not less than 10000 pensioners who person
ally appear and personally receive their pittance
every quarter at the agencies They have no
trouble about theiridentity; they are not obliged
to go before a notary and make proof every
Year: 1878

We invite correspondence from surgeons and
others on matters of general or special interest.
Views and suggestions of practical men are
always valuable.


We OF course can pay no attention to anony-
nous communications; but shall always hold
all communications addressed to us as strictly
confidential, unless the writer permits the use of
his name.
Year: 1878

In marrying, men should seek hap
py women. They make terrible
mistake when they marry for beauty,
or for talent, or for style; the sweet


est wives are those who possess the
magic secret of being happy uuder
any and every circumstance. Rich


or poor, high or low, it makes no
difference, the bright little fountain
bubbles up, just as musically in their
hearts. Nothing ever goes wrong
with them-no trouble is too serious
for them "to make the best of it" !"
Was ever the stream of calamity so
dark and deep, that the sunlight of q
happy face falling across its turbid
tides would not wake an answering
CLEAN! Why, these joyous tempered
people don't know half the good they
do. No matter how cross and crab
bed you feel, no matter if your brain
is full of meditation on ssaffiicting
dispensations,'s and your stomach
with medicine, pills and tonics, just
set one Of those cherry little women
talking to you, and we are not afraid
to wager anything she can cure you.
The long drawn hue about the mouth
will relax--the cloud Of settled
gloom will vanish nobody knows
where, and the first thing you know,
you will be laughing All, what bles-
sing are these happy women How
often their little hands guide the
ponderous machine of life, with al
most invisible touch How we look
forward through the weary day to
their fre-side smiles No one knows,
no one will ever know until the day
of judgment reveals, how much We


owe to these helpful, uncomplain-
ing happy women : /; go g
Year: 1878

II seems that there ID q man in
Kentucky who wisely saves . young
goose every year, whose breast bone
reveals to him the kind Of winter
which awaits him. As this, he holds,
Is an unerring index of the future,
we subjoin his Interpretation there-
for the benft Of all whom il may
concern


The Louisville KY Commercial
Of the 7th instant says :"This year
our goose has insisted upon taking
its own time in getting fat, and
numerous letters have been received
from different parts of the country,
inquiring after our little prophet,
but until our goose got fat and Offer
ed its life as . sacrifice to science
there was no chance for Q consulta-,
ton. A study Of its meteorgical
eoloring innicstes that wo are to
have severe winter. There is some
cold weather about the LIST Of De-
cember, which we are now realizing,
but il will not last long, and the
next week or two will be more plea
SAINT, with the prospects good for.
fair Christmas weather altogether
December will not be q very cold


month, but what it lacks will be


fully made up in January. The
new year will probably be welcomed


by bright weather, but the welcome
will be brief, and we will have cold


weather before the middle Of the
month, which will continue, with the
interspersion of a few bright days,
at the last Of the month, into the


most severe weather we have had


for years. February will be cold,
clustering month, and winter will
no doubt 70 q good way along with
with spring, carrying cold weather
and snow into March. Those who
took stock in the goose bone viIllay
in their fuelf and keep plenty Of
warm clothing about the house, as
the little prophet predicts long
winter and some very severe weather
during January !; according to it,
we will have long spell Of cold
weather during the first two months
Of the new year" i5,... so3
Year: 1878

Jarrett & Palmer and Mr.. T. B. Pugh
arrieved here to-day noon with these acs
tors and the Jubilee Singers who are to
appear at the Opera House tonight in
Uncle Toms Cabin" The party numbers
one hundred In all, sufficient to over
crowd the stage in plantation scenes in
which they take part in body. New
scenery came with the company and the
promise is made that the performances
will be an exceptionally good one: The
sale of seats is immense. To-morroS Y
night the revival will take place in Lam
caster.
Year: 1878

Alta party in Michigan a couple
OF young people submitted in jest to
mock marriage; and after the
ceremony was perform ed by a gem
tleman present the girl discovered
that he was justice of the pence,
and sho claimed that the marriage
was legal. The young man doesn't t
see it in that light.
Year: 1878

front parlor, so that he could enjoy
the explosion without going out Of
doors. Mr.. Babcock had been ex-
ceedingly troubled by goats, and
was particularly proud of his front
yard, which he had laid out with
great care and had surrounded with
fence of novel pattern and great
cost. Early in the morning the
expected goat butted the front gate
open, entered the yard, was lured
into the parlor, by the display of a
hoop skirt, and ate the apples. He
was an exceptionally long and mar
row goat, and was so persistently
thin that it was generally thought
that nothing, not even silver-plated
forks, could fatten him. In due
time he drank half the bucket OF
water and began to swell. Mr.
Babcock was in ecstasies. He lit
his cigar and sat on the front
piazza, looking through the window,
and, with his. watch in his hand,
noting how long it would be before
the explosion. There probably
never was goat who swelled Sc
tremendously as did that particular
goat.


At the end of an hour he was
as Mr.. Babcock is prepared to as
sert-at least fifseen feet in cir,
cumierence. Nevertheless, $the
looked-for explosion did not oc-
cur, neither did the goat seem tc
feel uneasy. He roamed around
the room, knocking down the fur.
niture, and occasionally butting
the piano. The disgusted Mr.,
Babcock would have tried to drive
him out, but had the door or the
window been twice as large as they
were, the expanded goat could moi
have passed through either o.
them. In his desperation the dis,
appointed man tried to shoot the
animal, but the shot rebounded
from his elastic sides and shattered
the mirror. There was nothing tt
be done but wait until the goa
should regain his usual proper
tions, and then to try to drive hin
out of the room.


That swelled goat never col
laps d. He is still fifteen feet il
circumference, and he cannot b,
got out of the parlor without pre-
viously tearing down the wall
People come from all parts Of tn
. country to look at that goat, AM
Mr. Babcock has been sued by a
Irishman for feloniously takini
possession of his goat and refusing
To return it.
Year: 1878

the ribs. It didn't take him two
minutes to make the ghost beg.


"Of course, the ghost was jim
Kerney himself. 1t was plain
enough afterward, but it was a
little scary at the time. He said
he'd come aboard to lick the pilot
what smashed his red boat. He
had two red boats, he said, but the
one he smashed was his pet. He
didn't mind, he said, going around
inside the wheel two or three times
himself, as long as he got out safe,
but he had a grudge against the
man that smashed his boat. But
he was satisfied.


"The other man that was with
Jim in the little boat on the night
of the accident did not get into the
wheel at all. Jim was a powerful
swimmer, and as soon as he got
out he swan ashore, and helped his
companion in, too. How did he
get aboard the steamer next night
Easy enough. He made a good
plan to clean out the pilot, and
spent some money on it, but
lit didn't work. he sent his
friend down to New York City by
rail-, to come up on the boat. When
we reached the place Jim was out
on the river in his boat, and hi
friend was on the lower deck, stand
ing by the stern rail. Jim threw
him a long line, that gave the boa
plenty of play, and he easily caughI
it, and drew the boat up astern
Jim jumped aboard, but he was il
such hurry to fight he couldn'
wait for his friend to come and hell
him, so he got thrashed. Thel
both went ashore about ten min
utes afterward. There's Jim Ker
ney's red boat now.


"Ever see any spirits? / SCI
them every night. I'm off dutl
now for the night, and have somt
bottled spirits in my cabin. Com,
down and try some%
Year: 1878

An Oihk Osh IncIdent which shows


Husbands Ought 80 Keep Out of


the Kitchen.


New York Times.l


OF the numerous eminent citi-
zens of Oshkosh there is none who
is more deserving of respect than
Mr.. Johnston. Not only is he an
amiable and upright man, but he is
gifted with remarkable inventive
genius. At least such is his opinion,
and those who are not personally
acquainted with him rarely deny
that his opinion is right, Mrs.
Johnston, howsver, does not regard
her husband as an able inventor.
She admits that he means well, but
she asserts with much emphasis
that when one of his inventions
comes in at the front door it is time
for her to fly out of the nearest
available window, if her life Is real
ly worth saving,


Mr.. Johnston has always main
tained that his wife's lack of faith
in him was due to an unfortunate
accident in connection with an at
tempt made by him to manufacture
rice griddle-cakes. AS he Justly
says, cooking has nothing to do
with invention, and that it is unjust
to discredit his inventive genius
simply because he once made a mis-
take in cooking. The circumstances
Of the affair were these: Mr.. john
ston, who had repeatedly found fault
with his breakfast, remarked on one
occasion. that his wife seemed alb
solutely incapable of making rice
griddle-cakes. Whereupon that in
dignant woman announced that she
should refuse to have anything to
do with the next days breakfast,
and should lay the whole burden of
its preparation uron her husbands
shoulders. "0r course" she added,
''you know how to make rice cakes
better than the Angel Gabriel, and
YOU can Just show, for once, what
you can do"


With great courage Mr.. Johnston
undertook the unwelcome task thus
thrust upon him, and made his
preparations with intelligent care.
There were eight persons in his
family, and, as he estimated that
each one would eat II pint of rice,
he decided TO use four quarts OF rice
in mixing his griddlecakes. TO the
rice he added four quarts of butter
milk and quart OF hot water, be-
sides few handfuls of flour and
Indian meal, IL order that the cakes
should look Drown. He then re-
hected that it would be necessary
to add to the mixture something
that would make it light, and &C.
cordingly threw in teacupful of
cream of tartar, an equal quantity
of salaatus, and half paper Of
baking powder. Having thus mixed
his cake 10 his satisfaction, he
placed the pan containing the mix
ture in a warm corner of the kitch-
en- and left it to "rise" during the
night,


There is no doubt that it did
rise" Moreover, the rice swelled,
On going into the kitchen the next
Year: 1878

morning, Mr.. Johnston found that
his rice cakes had overAowed and
covered the floor to a depth of at
least a foot, while in the immediate
neighborhood OF the pan pyramid
of batter reached nearly to the cell
ing. That morning he breakfasted
on dry bread and water, and subse-
quently employed three Irish wo-
men to clear the kitchen, and an
Irishman to carry away the mirac-
ulous batter. Naturally, his wife
taunted him with his culinary fail
ure, but the unprejudiced mind
will admit that it ought not to have
cast any discredit on his inventive
powers.
Year: 1878

Gated by OOIOrea Foster Parents.
Dallas (Texas) Herald.l


Near the line of tile San Jacinto
street railway, on the Central rail-
road in this city, there lives a white
girl with a colored family whose
history is remarkably romantic
According to the story told by hei
sable foster father, and the writing,
he produces to prove the sane, the
girl is the illegitimate offspring Of
parties of the highest social stand,
ing, near Hickman, KY, each OIL
whom were wealthy. One night
after he and his family had retired
to rest, he was awakened by the CRY
of an infant and'a knocking at the
door, and on opening it found a
white baby in a basket on the ster
with Il note pinned to it, telling him
to take care OF 1t, and that he in
turn would be cared for pecuniarily.


Through commisseration he took
the child in and cared for it. He
had children of his own, but the
heart of the black man was touched,
and he determined to rear the child
as his own and be true to it. The
parents of the child had never in
any way made themselves known
otherwise than in the note above
mentioned, and the negro had be-
come to regard it as one of his own
children. On the fifth birthday Of
the adopted child woman of ele-
CANT family and character appeared
and demanded it, claiming that she
had paid promptly for its mainten-
once, she having married in the
meantime. But the negro man
promptly refused to deliver up the
child to which he had come to be
very much attached, and suit was
instituted by the parties to regain
possession Of it, but, after hearing
the trial, the judge decided 10 favor
Of the negro. The case was taken
by the other parties to the Supreme
Court, where it was decided in the
same manner. tfn


AT thirteen years of ace. the
girl, who had already an English
education, was sent to a female col
loge in Millersburg, Ky. Here she
met with an individual named Fol-
some, who was attending college at
that place, and what at first prom
ised to prove but a mere acquaint-
ance, grew and ripened into love,
and they became engaged. While
they were yet engaged young Fol
some was shot and killed in a diff
Guilty with a fellow-student. This
sad episode in her life was u source
of great grief to her, and she aban-
doned her studies and returned
home with a longing to see the
country of which her dead loyer
had SO often spoken. She persuad-
ed the negro man to move to the
Choctaw Nation, in the Indian Ter
ritory, where she lived over the
dreams Of her saddened anticipa-
tions. After spending part of the
time here they came to this city,
where they have lived ever since,
the girl being source Of curiosity
to the denizenS of this city.
Year: 1878

day somewhat informally in the honest
feryor Of the moment, characterized The
President as u fraud. The moral tc
which be would point his colleague was
that when one takes an office to which he
Is not elected, and takes 1t through cor.
rupt means, II Is better not TO trust any
thing he does. He proceeded 10 discuss
the civil service reform policy, and said
the civil service reform under the present
Executive was lame humbug, and both
sides Of the House knew 1t TO be futile
and ioolish-the fountain Of honor itseli
was poisoned. He enumerated various
appointments under the present Admin
istration as specimens Of the civil service
reform, and asked why Anderson and
Wells had been appointed to Offices when
one Of them was already sentenced
to the penitentiary, and the other was
about 10 be. The reason was that they
had 10 be rewarded for aiding TO build up
the rotten fabric Of the very throne
which dispensed the power.


When Mr.. Cox's hour expired a mo.
ton to extend his time was made aud
and passed.


Nj. Cox proceeded with his speech. BE
characterized the civil service system as
a bundle Of incongruities, based on false
pretenses. They all knew how futile and
foolish were the inconsequential and DISC
beyed orders to officials 10 abstain from
ali interference in politics. hence the ut
ter friendlessness OF the administration;
hence the rejection OF the President by
both parties as foundling over whose
political birth the bar sinister would ever
hang. II might be an exaggeration to
state that more personal appointments
to office had been made under President
Hayes than under President Grant, but
was II 30? The leading promoter Of
Hayes nomination was in the Cabinet;
his most conspicuous hustings orator was
his associate in the same relation; the
best mission to Europe had been given 10
a politician from his own State who had
manipulated the votes Of the nominating
convention; two Of the electoral lawyers
were Cabinet members; two others were
In foreign missions; former private
Secretary had the best German consulate.
Some Of these violations Of civil service
reform deGed all classification. The his.
tory OF no government furnished proof
90 overwhelming as to corrupt and hypo.
critical practices. Political debauchery
had been the rule, faithful trust and wor-
thiness the exception.


Mr.. Neal made speech in defense Of
the consular service and system.


The committee rose and the House
after which notice was given
OF Democratic caucus tomorrow even.
Year: 1878

but also In other cities further north, in
which the comments Of the press are not
so candid and outspoken. The tone Of
the markets does not indicate a very
Iatisiactory prospect for business in Sny
Of the leading cities Of the country thus


far lhisspring.
Year: 1878

Joseph Loupe, once wealthy. now
poor, has been living unhappily with
his wife in New Jersey. Mrs. Loupe
r, Gently became attached to a stable
man and told her love to Mr. Loupe,
who agreed to leave his wife if his ri,
val would give him So in cash and pay
a liquor bill of IS. This was agreed to
and legal separation papers have been
drawn up.
Year: 1878

Potter is going to New Orleans t" as
certain if there is anybody else in that
oi,y who knows az much about frauds
as Anderson and Mrs. jerks did. There
is prevalent impression that if Potter
would strike due north and begin to
inquire around Manhattan Island in
the nrighborhood of No, Is Gramercy
Park, he might get upon the trail of
something.
Year: 1878

Young men come in and see our
beautiful custom>made Cater Shoes,
they are glove fitting. and equal in
quality and finish to the very best
handmade. We have big lot of fine
Boots, same make. We can please
tasty young men in nice Boots and
Shoes.


Our lady friends can see line. of
new White Goods and a big LOT, of
beautiful Hamberg Edgings by call
ing on us; they are simply magnificent
and cheaper than ever.


a. nice line of beautiful New
Dress Goods, Trimming Silks and
other beauties received. this week.
For all kinds of fashionable and
Stylish Goods for Ladies Wear we
have them.


Ice Cold Fans, and Parasols, Fan
Girdles and Fine Perfumes in big DIS
play.
Year: 1878

Editor Erehcaqe:


notice some weeks ago that Maj.
WiIlo HAYWOOD, editor Of the Browns
vile Democrat and chairman of the
Congressional Executive Committee,
in writing an article aga n,t primary
elections, with good deal of authori-
ty, notified us Democrats that at the
proper time he would call a conyen-
ton. Now, as it has been announced
by one high in authority that we shall
not have the privilege Of the exercise
of our ballots in the selection of the
can ddates of our choice, Iwould like
for you to find out for us, 1--WE being
to afraid ask), if there be any harm in
the Democrats Of this portion of Glib
son county having q separate ballot
box on the 1st day of August, and
quietly, orderly and honestly saying
who they would prefer to send to the
A6th Congress of the, United States. If
it would detract. from the majesty of
Mas WiIlo and effect his high Official
position we will not ask it. But if it
can be bad without detriment to him,
and injury 70 the party, our peo-
pie would be glad to exercise that
privilege.


LIFE Lone DEMOCRAT.


Gibson county, June 10Th, 1878.