Year: 1879

NV mother died when l was so young
that I had only shadowy remembrance
of a pale face, and long, last clasp TO
the loving heart. / had been my ia
theirs pet and darling, and now he was
dead. too, and his will had consigned
me, just like a bale of goods, to the care
and guardianship of his brother, doc
tor, whose house lay among the pictur-
esque mountains of Cumberland.


was too impulsive' said the will,
and would throw myself and my mon
ey away before 1 knew the value OF
either if / had no one to take care oi
me ,; and so, when my poor father died
in the south of France, where we had
gone TO winter, Uncle Ritson, whe came
barely in time to lay him in the foreign
grave, carried me off at once to his
house on the bleak hillside, gave me a
kiss as he lifted me out Of the stufiy
vehicle which had conveyed us from the
station, presented me to my aunt and
cousins with 'Well, here's Adela y
and told me to consider myself AT
home.'


1t was the beginning Of January, in
tensely cold. The sudden change from
a warmer climate had sensibly affected
me was chilled under all my furs,
and perhaps more chilled by the re-
straining influence of my fathers will,
having pondered the too impulsive
all through the journey.


Certainly, l was not too impulslve
on my entrance to my new home


Aunt and cousins had met me on The
t threshold with warm welcome, pressed
to remove my wraps and to make me
There was huge fire
blazing on the hearth, tea-table piled
with north-country Injuries, and all that
should have made me feel at home, but
something was wanting, and instead OF
responding to their greetings in my own
natural fashion, l dropped into seat,
after my first glance around, and, Gov
ering my face with my hands, burst into
tears.


1 have small, thin, quick ears. l
overheard Aunt Ritson whisper to Bella
and Winnie as she drew them back:


Hush! It's but natural, poor BARN !!
Leave your cousin alone, lasses she
will come to herself all the sooner


And l did come to myself; but wheth.
er my tears had fallen frostily on their
hot hearth, or we travellers had brought
a chill in with US, Or my own manner
did not invite efiusion, certain air OF
restraint seemed to grow upon us and
when 1 was shown to the room set apart
forme and left to myself, L flung my
self upon my bed and sobbed in pas
slonate grief for my dead father, declar-
ing that was alone in the world, ut
terly alone.


And this feeling grew upon me-
Looking back, l am conscious that it
was much my own fault that | had not
responded with sufficient warmth and
gratitude to the relatives who had made
room in their household for one they had
not seen since she was baby, and had
met ;ne with open arms and hearts.


They had heard that 1 was gushing
and exuberant, a creature Of impulse,
and finding me reserved and languld,
concluded that /, accustomed TO ele-
gance and luxury, could not brook the
homeliness and retirement Of my new
life. l was rich, and they were not
They mistook my morbid melancholy
for pride, and ceased TO press their So
ciety or attention on me, lest should
attribute to them mercenary motives.


l see it all now, but then l was blind
l had another grief at my heart beside:
sorrow for my dead parent, and l feal
whenever my thoughts flew to thai
lonely grave among the Pyrennees
questioned the policy which had isolated
me from The world-the world in whicl
nv hero lived and moyed-and prisoneC
nv free soul among those unresponsiy'
walls of stone.


In this rhapsody l did not apostro-
phize alone the four walls of the solit
stone house that, set against the noun
tain side, with a background of pine
larch, and mountain ash, looked so coli
and gray, staring with its many lidles
eyes from its rocky perch above th'
struggling lake village, on the steep
ungraded roadway in front, and tn
narrow strips Of garden ground stretch
ing like green arms on either side.


No, | held converse with the noun
tains. They were to me the barrie
between love and life and happiness
but it was only on their solitary height
/ felt free to give the feeling utterance
The thrifty household ways Of my aun
and cousins, which kept them very busy


were strange to me. My dainty finger
had no acquaintance with rolling-pin O


pasteboard. 1t was not who kept s


bright the Mirror in which saw my ow
beauty-aye, and my own unhappines


reflected. / was supposed TO b


mourning, and, with mistaken delicacl


was left to do-nothing.


Had Uncle Ritson known 1t, or ho


spent my time. he would have shake


me up like bottle Of fphysic and shou
have been the better for it. But whct
er on foot, or horseback, or In his al
cent gig, he was of in the mOrnin