smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1878

A man was lately before a London
Police Court for attempting to commit
suicide by jumping of a bridge into
the Thames, He pleaded that he bad
lost his wife and two children in the
Princess Alice disaster, and was des-
perate. His wife was produced in
Court, and said that she had no chill
dren. lie then explained that he had
been drinking with friend who had
lost his wife aud children, and his
sympathies were so exercised that he
got confused, and thought il was his
own case.
Year: 1878




says the River Falls Gdzettc w,
suppose many people think that th,
newspaper men are persistent duns


Let a farmer place himself in a simi


lar position and see IL he would do the
same. Suppose he raises 900 bush
els of wheat and his neighbor should
come and buy a bushel, and the price
was a small matter Of 81 or less, and
he says, 81 will hand you the amount
in a few days" AS the farmer does
not want 10 be small about the matter
he says all right, and the man leaves
with his wheat. Another comes in
the same way until the whole 81 900
bushels Of wheat are trusted out to
one thousand different persons, and
not one Of the persons concerns him
self about it, for il is n small amount
he owes the farmer and of course that
would not help him any. He does
not realize that the farmer has fritted
away all his crop Of wheat and that
its value is due him in a thousand lit
tie driblets, and he is seriously en-
barrassed in his business because his
debtors treat it as a small matter. But
if all would pay him promptly. which
they could do as well as not, it would
be a very large amount to the farmer,
and enable him to carry on his busi-
ness without difficulty. The above
comparison is too true a statement Of
the difficulties that the newspaper
man has to contend with.
Year: 1878

Among other curiosities on exhibi.
tiOn at the American department Of
the Paris Exposition was a spring
chicken from an American boarding
house. The chicken was taken to the
guilOtine one morning, but when the
heavy knife fell on its neck, the fowl
give frightened squawk, and after
one or two tremendous pulls, jerked
its head away from under the knife,
and made its way back to its coop in
the Exposition. The knife was sent
to the foundry for repairs.-[Burling.
ton Hawkeye.
Year: 1878

A st. Louis young mans chance Of
marrying an heiress, to whom he was
engaged, was spOilt by the use of hi
diary as evidence in lawsuit. The
record showed that he frequently call.
ed on other girls, that he had been re.
jected by two of them since his be-
trothal to her, and that he had Dor.
rowed money, to be repaid when he
got hold of her purse.
Year: 1878

DEEP PLowlSG. If land be natu.
rally wet and rich in vegetable matter,
be careful to have the subsoil exam.
ined before bringing it to the surface.
If the soil be stiff, drainage should
rather be resorted to. If the surface
soil be sandy and the underlying soil
more retentive, it may be well tO
bring the under surface to the top, a,
mixture of the two will be an i'm.
provement, provided the lower con
tains no deleterious matter. If the
surface soil be rich in lime, it is well
to mix it with the subsoil il the lattal
be wanting of that substance.
Year: 1878

There is some reason for young girls
going crazy over a clergyman, but
there Is none for the married women.
Yet few of these would ruin them
selves and the clergy. too, if they had
a chance. Especially is this the case
where husband is careless and makes
little of his wife at home. II he will
not consent to be the home idol, the
minister is exalted to that position,
and then both minister and woman
must pray with all their might that
they may be delivered from tempta-
tion.-[ An Ex.Clergyman.
Year: 1878

Ii is an old saying that a brother is
a severe critic. Certainly he is not
likely to have many illusions about
his sister, lie knows whether her
beauty goes to bel with her at night
and gets up with her early in the
morning. lie is not deceived by the
amiability of her parlor smile. lie
understands how much genuine feel.
ing there is under her many aHecta-
tions. lie lovcs her; but his afiec-
ton has no bandage over his eyes. He
is always sensitive about keeping her
free from censure or suspicion. A
girls knowledge OF her brother is sci.
dom 80 accurate. She is prone TO
make mistakes about his abilities IN
worldly pursuits if not about his
household virtues, and he plays the
part of her hero until more import
ant and commonly less deserving per-
son appears and pushes him from the
pedestal Of her heart Boys never
make any schemes for marrying their
sisters, aud are never quite sure, not.
withstanding all their harsh home
Judgments, that any fellow is good
enough for them. Girls always have
n dear friend whom they want their
pet brother to marry, but If that plot
fails they grow critical in regard to
the qualifications Of his future wife,
and often render themselves disagree
able to him by pointing out iOibles
only visible to a feminine but especi.
ally obnoxious to masculine judg-
ment. Indeed it may be assumed
that n mans sister will be harder TO
please touching the wealth, beauty
and social standing of his wife than
he is himself 4 World.
Year: 1878

The tramp Is the man who sees the whole world and loses his own sole,

 Insanity is no canse for divorce in Wisconsin, They think a person must be crazy in the first place to marry.

 A young lady Tn New Haven snuffs candles and cores ap- pies with q pistol. The young men are very respectful in their atten- tions to her.

 How greedy you arey" said one little glrl to another. who had taken the best apple on the dish; "l was going to take that

 What is the difference between aa overcoat and a baby? An over coat is what yon wear and a baby is what you was.

 --Womed measure their dresses ay the finger, and this is also the way men measure their drinks.

 An old lady from the South said she never could imagine where all smiths came from until she saw in  a New England town a large sign smith Manufacturing Go.

 The greatest of men have been Che hardest workers" says some body, and considering he never had the pleasure of our acquaintances, he made close shot.

 Well, h--ll!-remarked Mir. Townsend of newport Ky, when hay ing asked for his supper; at Clncin
Year: 1878

head at the idea of my danger, as sur
yeyed these five monsters, any one of
them being able to gobble me up at a
meal and want more. But I had not
fought 'Old Ephe' among the Rocky
Mountains to give up even among such
straits. "Sweet Sixteen" had the lever
reversed and new charge in the barrel
before you could say "Jack Robinson"
took steady aim at the tiger immedi-
ately in front of me. and bowled him
over as dead as door-nail. His COM
rades started as they saw him fall, and
taking advantage of the pause, 1 dashed
forward over his body toward the tank.


My flight was the signal for pursuit.


Scarcely had l cleared the dead tiger
when four simultaneous roars Of anger
greeted my ears, and | could hear the
crash af the falling bodies as all four
sprang Cor the spot had just vacated.
So eagerwere they that they fell against
one another. But they were disappoint-
ed in their leaps. and, like all felines,
looked ashamed, and hesitated before
making another.


| saw that boldness was my only sal
vation. | was not six feet from the fore
most tiger, and pointing my gun at his
broad forehead, | had the satisfaction of
seeing him bite the dust. What
should have done with the other three
cannot tell. for they were taken off my
hands very unexpectedly. A sudden
Kissing and sputtering arose close by,
and a fery-tailed monster shot through
the air into the midst of the three tigers,
blowing up with loud report immedi-
ately between the two rearmost.


You ought to have seen those crea-
lures get. The rocket took all the fight
out of them in moment, soaring them
almost to death. All three galloped off,
with their tails swelled out to three
times their natural size with terror,
while stood laughing unrestrainedly al
the ludicrous figure cut by my lately
formidable opponents.


Mohammed, the shikkaree, had prov.
ed my salvation. He had been hunting
for me when he heard my first shot close
by, and hastened to the spot to be of as.
sistance if possible. He just arrived in
the nick of time His rockets proved
even more eficacious than my bullets,
and learnt lesson. not to 60 too fal
into the jungle alone again. for fear
might fall unawares into another nest o.
tigers.
Year: 1878

Hearst thou the song it sings to me?
The endless song Of the dark fir tree,
Before my window, beside my door,
1t sighs and whispers forevermore.
By dawn, or daylight. or nights mid-hour
hear its still small voice Of power,


ETERNITY EternityT'
Is the hourly message it brings to me.
When l am weary and worn with pain,
And the burning sunshine fires my brain,
FAINT and listless and fit for death,
1t swings and rustles with fragrant breath;
"Hot and lonely thy noon may be.
But there is long. long rest for thee;


ETERNITY Eternityl"
This is the psalm of the old fir tree.
Sometimes the storms of summer pour.
The lightnngs dazzle, the thunders roar;
Those dark boughs groan, and writhe, and sway,
But signing and moaning still they say
IAN end to the tempests of earth shall be;
A tranquil morning awaiteth thee


Eternityl Eternityl
Beyond the fateful and angry sea-"
When winter hath scattered leaf and rose.
And the boughs bend low with heavy SHOWS,
Their patient dropping lesson lends.
To life borne down with the care He sends.
"Bend to thy burden awhile for thee
The weight and the wear of toll must be,


Etemityl Eternityl
From care and carking shall set Free"
II the ways of man my spirit vex,
And the ways of God my soul perplex.
When He hath taken my lfe's desire,
And molten my heart in His fning fire.
When the dearest eyes cannot see,
And the voice longed for is dead to me;
"Waitl for thy longing shall find the key;


Eternity Eternityl
There shall the daysprlng come back to thee"
SOfty singeth the dark fir tree.
When shall sleep in my quiet grave;
Oh kindly fir tree above me wavel
Utter thy anthems to one who grieves
Under thy shining, singing leaves;
keep thy faith like the fadeless treel
Tender and true let memory be.


Eternityl EternityI
There thy lost love is waiting for theel'
Blest be thy music. oh dark fir treel
And blessed the Maker who fashioned thee
Year: 1878




"Where there's will there's a way"
That is truism which is but half under
stood. 1t is said that 4 contest once arose
between the ugliest and the handsomest
man in England for the hand of lady of
worth and beauty. The homely man won
the prize. When Disraeli made his maiden
speech in the English parliament, he was
l,uxhod down, but not dIscouraged.A
Knowing what was in him, realizing we'll
the power of the will, he declared, The
time will come when you will listen to me. -
The day came, rs all the world knows.
Obstacles which would alarm ordinary
minds he brushed as cobwebs, and pushed
on to the foremost position in English
politics, proving that he conquers who
believes he can. ''Faint heart never won
fair lady," or anything else worth winning.
Young man, aim high, take counsel of
wisdom, and you are almost sure to win
something worth having. How many
young men are there whose watchwords
are ''press on and push through" Too
many there are who believe that success
comes more from luck and favoritism than
pluck. Many an able and worthy man has
been disabled in the battle of life by trust
ing to outside support, leaning upon
friends or waiting for a government ap-
pointment and neglecting the power with
in.


1t would be interesting to know, if the
could be discovered, how many
there are who use more than tenth of the
brain and heart power they really possess.
Here and there we find one who moves the
world, but they are few and far between.
Year: 1878

1t is Byron, the dramatist, who to the
adage that there's no use crying over split
MILK appropriately adds the reflection
that it only adds to the water in it. This is
too sadly true. Most of us have good
many dark days to look back upon. Cur
lives contain intervals OF blight and mill
dew-opportunities blasted, money thrown
away, talents squandered, and true friends
neglected and false ones cherished. The
pity of it all is that by the time we discern
these things we are generally reduced to a
condition that borders upon despair. Be
cause retrospect shows us that much of
our time has been wasted we jump to the
conclusion that all of it must come under
that condemnation. Sad indeed would it
be were this nnquestiOnably 50. And it
may safely be claimed, without justly incur
ring the charge of bathos, that in the mis-
takes, the imprudence, the crimes, if you
will, that men commit, and all these evil
deeds which bite into the soul with suffe.ar
ing's angry acid, men are capable of ac-
quiring that wisdom which prepares them
for better life. The very remorse that is
generated by an evil act may become q
mans good angel to shield him from flu
ture crime. In this case regrets are to be
welcomed. They are the black-robed but
beautiful guardians Of a perverted na-
tire that re-seeks the light.
Year: 1878

Some one wisely undertakes to tell how
it comes that girl cannot throw stone
straighl in this wise:


1t was one of the first and most knotty
physiological problems which presented
itself to our youthful mind-why our big
sister, when she tried to throw Il SNOWFALL
at us, almost invariably sent it careening
over the top of the house, while we, in
turn, could pop her in the ear every time.


Now, the point of difference between Il
girls throwing and boys we found to be
substantially this; The boy crooked his el-
bow and reached back with the upper part
of his arm at about right angles with the
body, and the forearm at an angle of forty
five degrees; the direct act of throwing
was accomplished by bringing the arm
back with sort OF snap, like the tail of a
snake or whip lash, working every joint
from shoulder to wrist, and sometimes
making your elbow sing as though you
had got whack on the crazy bone. The
girl threw with her whole arm rigid; the
boy with his whole arm relaxed.


Why this marked and unmistakable diff
ference existed we never learned until, at a
somewhat advanced period, we dove into
a book Of physiology, and learned that the
clavicie, or collar bone, in the anatomy of
female, is some inches longer and Set
some degrees lower down that in the mas
culine frame. This long. crooked, awk-
ward bone interferes with the full and free
action OF the shoulder, and that's the rea-
son why girl can't throw stone.


The design Of this sort of thing is still
unexplained to our entire satisfaction. We
have developed pet theory of our
own, however,, that an all-wise and benef.
icent Providence, foreseeing that there
would be rolling-pins and stove-hooks and
pOt-lids and hot water in the world, set
the woman's clavicle down hitch or two
for the safety of the men.


It's lucky for all Of us that women can't
throw stones.
Year: 1878

There Is no other way by which friend
ship is so completely broken, or so thor
oughly and completely crushed out of ex-
istence, as by coldness of manner; hard
words are no competitors at all, for they
are so often satisfactorily explained. 1t is
frequently said that like begets like, }" and
we believe it is often SO. five meet with
acquaintances who grasp our hand cordial
ly, and give 10 generous and hearty shake,
and their cOuntenance lights up with a
cheerful smile as they utter pleasant and
welcome salutation, if we are feeling dull
and moody, We lle, or at least should be,
ashamed of that feeling, and instantly put
forth our energies to disguise and Danish


t. Ii, on the contrary, We meet with one
who repels our every attempt to be cordial
by studied GOODNESS Of manner, we very
soon become impervious to any genial
feeling for him, and larger stock Of pride
springs to our aid than we ever dreamed
our hearts possessed, and a CULTS then and
there formed, over which . passable bridge
can never be effected. fs
Year: 1878

Having read the recent tragic death of


st. Louis gambler. in last Sundays San,


have thought it advisable to give the publi


an idea of the gamblers chances. Iti


safe to venture the assertion that if a per


son could be thoroughly convinced Their


was no chance whatever of his winning


penny, but that he would, to an absolut,


certainty, lose every dollar he might haz


ard at the game of faro, he would foreve


abandon habit SO demoralizing in its re
| suits. There is no reason whatever why :


mind capable Of reasoning should not ar


rive ut the conclusion that, although one


may enjoy temporary luck at intervals, his
ultimate defeat is rs sure as that his moral
nature suffers depletion with the turn OF
every card.


Probably the best proof Of this advan-
tage on the part Of the bank was offered
by an experiment made by eleven we'll
known gamblers in this city. Determined
to test the chances of the game, they es-
tablished bank with capital of $4,000,
placing it in charge ofone of their numl e.,
while the remaining ten played against it
for the term of one year, each with stake
Of $1,000. At the end of the time specified
it was found that not one of the ten players
had a dollar of his original stake, but that
the bank had absobed their entire capital.


Old gamblers declare that any man will
beat himself at guessing in the long-run.
and upon the truth Of that axiom the GAM
blers who run these dens of theft thrive at
the expense Of the infatuated men who re-
fuse to accept it until ruin stares them in
the face. Those who have given the sub
ject much attention declare that no more
than four gamblers in this country ever
amassed a competence by gambling, unless
they owned and conducted the games
themselves.


1t is in small communities that gambling
hells occasion their greatest amount OF
misery. for they depend for custom not
upon the army Of professional sports, but
their supporters are furnished from the
artisan population and younger mercantile
communicative very ones who can least
afford to lose the tribute money that the
tiger daily extorts from his vOtarics. 1t
would he ridiculous were it not nlournful,
this blind mania for play ard belief in
treacherous chances. Your novice. and
veteran as well, will play the game on Mon
day and lose twenty-five dollars, repeat the
dose on Tuesday to the tune of thirty dol
lars. Wednesday ditto of twenty dollars,
and II he makes winning of fifty dollars
on Thursday he will go home perfectly
confident of his ability to beat
faro, never pausing to reflect that sum-
mary OF his four days. work shows him
dollars out of pocket to only
fifty dollars received.-Cor. N. J.. San.
Year: 1878

What glorious thing it is for the human
heart. Those who work hard seldom
yield to fancied or real sorrow. When
grief sits down, folds its hands. and mourn
fully feeds upon its own tears, weaving the
dim shadows that little exertion might
sweep away, into funeral pail, the strong
spirit is shorn of its might, and sorrow be-
comes our master. When troubles flow
upon you dark and heavy, toll not with the
waves, and wrestle not with the torrent !;
rather seek by occupation to divert the
dark waters that threaten to Overwhelm
you with thousand channels which the
duties of life always present.
Year: 1878

We have made discovery; a veritable
discovery! For the benefit of those who
are in the habit of tearing their nails to
pieces in buttoning stiffly starched linen,
such, for instance, as cuffs or wristbands,
we will impart knowledge of this import
ant discovery. 1t is briefly this: Dip the
finger to the first joint in water, and then
apply it to the wrong side of the wristband
or cuff, directly over the buttonhole. This
simple expedient will sufficiently moisten
it to enable the button or the stud to be
adjusted without any severe strain upon
the finger nails, and without getting out OF
patience. Try it.-Dr. Foote's Health
Monthly.
Year: 1878

At the singing school the other night, a
young man was Dragging about the
strength Of his lungs, and invited girl in
the company to hit him. in the breast. She
said she was left-handed; had been wash
ing that day and was tired and did not feel
very active, but at his urgent request she
let 90 at him. When his friends went to
pick him up he said he thought he would
die easier lying down. He had lost all
recollection of having any lungs, but the
young woman cOnsoled him by admitting
that she didn't hit him as hard as she
might have done, because she rather liked
llim.-Siour Fails PantaerapA.





The longer live, the more certain am
that the great difference between men, be-
tween the feeble and the powerful, the
great and the insignificant, is energy-in.
vincible determinations purpose ono.
fixed, and then death or victory! That
quality will do anything that can be done
in this world; and no talents, no circum-
stances, $50 opportunities, will make two.
legged creature maa without it.-Dks.
Year: 1878

believe would have been ruinons to the State. We chose to do our duty and speak our honest convictions, and so we did. We are heartily glad that the scheme has failed, and are truly rejoiced that it is now elim- mated from the politics of our State. There are other questions demand ing attention of far mere importance to the people of our State, and may we not hope shat they will now re- ceive at least & portion of the atten- ton which so many patriotic gentle men have been bestowing upon this financial question. We want a re- trenchment in the administration of the State Government. We want a more efficient working of our public school system. We want all insane asylum. Let us turn our attention to these matters and see if it will not add about as much to our credit and prosperity as it will to run crazy to get tho holders of our fraudulent bonds to compromise claims at double or tripple their value.
Year: 1878

Elsewhere we publish letter to the People of Arkansas from Major Jno. D. Adams, on the subject ct Arkansas Finances. Notwithstand- ing the length of the document we have given it in full, believing that our readers will be willing to stand the loss of this much valuable space for the satisfaction of knowing that the scheme is dead! dead! pEApl During the discussion of the matter for the past four months we have expressed ourselves freely upon the

 subject, and now that it is all over we can only say that we have not q single regret for having pursued the course we did. We regarded the plan as a bad one for the State, and we therefore opposed it regardless of consequences. We lost some personal friends by our course, but we can never consent to retain any persons friendship at a sacrifice of ouf duty. We had either to lose their friendship or to shirk the duty devolving upon us of denouncing q scheme which we believed and yet
Year: 1878

A spirited controversy between


Messrs. Dawes and Sargent on one
side and Voorhees, and Hereford on
the other, and all of them ex-mem-


bers of the House, occurred in con-
nection with the debate of the silver
bill in the Senate yesterday. The as


sertion of Dawes and Sargent, that
the legislation Of 1873, whereby the
old SILVER dollar was banished from
the coinage, was sufficiently public to
inform everybody of the purpose and
effect Of the measure, was met and re-
futed by Voorhees, and Hereford,
who claimed that the substitute
which accomplished the demonetiza-
tion of silver was not read in the
House, that the people Of the country
were in absolute ignorance of the eff
feet of what had been done, that
President Grant was unaware of it
a year after he had signed the bill,
and that John Sherman declared three
years after the bill was passed that
no change had been made in the law
affecting the silver dollar as legal
tender. And the best of it was that
the goldite champions could not get
over nor go around these hard, solid
facts.-Chicago Tribune.