Year: 1879

A gentleman Just in from Western


trip gives laughable account of thu


trials of a newly-wedded couple who


boarded the train at a way station. He


says as the train drew up to the station


the whole car was aroused by the unusual


din and noisy farewells, "wish you much
joys" and repeated kissings Of jovial
crowd oi young folks at the depot The


ewly-msrried couple, arrayed in wedding


costumes, and evidently fresh from the
final service, took seats in the center O
the car, and were at once the attraction.


In very few moments both bride and


greOm gave evidence that there was some


more overpowering agencies than love


at work in their systems. The groom


turned over a seat in front and elevated


his pedals; he put his arm modestly upon
the back of the seat, while the air from
the window fioated the white veil and the
flavor of orange blossoms over his face.


But something was on his mind, and he
momentarily squirmed in all manner of
ways. The bride, too, seemed to have
the same symptoms. She tried the easiest
attitudes, now with her head lovingly
upon The manly shoulder, then suddenly
aIousing and looking uneasily from the
window as II in expectancy OF a disaster,
or that she would meet the frown OF an
angry father. Suddenly, when all our
eyes were attracted to the couple, the
groom evidently receiving a new and
deeper twinge, with misery depicted in
every feature of his lace, lifted his right
leg and began Juggling at a new boot
which some wicked shoemaker had in
weighed him into buying as perfect fit.
After pulls and tugs which made the veins
stand out on his face, and the arteries in
his neck throb like a small engine,
he succeeded IN releasing his foot, and
sense of happiness stole across his manly
face. The bride surveyed the smile, but
it seemed only To increase her misery.
She wiggled, she famed, and, finally, in
desperation, she attacked the buttons of
her new shoes with as much vigor as her
lord did his boots, and one by one they
dropped upon the floor. Both sets of feet
were placed in proximity upon the over.
turned seat, and the brides shawl hid
them from the vulgar gaze. The bonnet
was unlimbered from its pedestal, and
the blushing bride dropped easily upon
the shoulder of her husband, and securely
slept, as the train whistled and stopped
and started. The passengers, relieved of
all anxiety, had setted to catnaps and
newspapers and peanuts, when a long
whistle was followed by the brakeman
putting his head in at the door and yell
ing "CressOn."


ofcdt Jcrusaieul Juiia. wake up! mere
we are" shouted the bridegroom, land
there's them internal boots"


He jumped at them and tugged and
sweat and swore, but those feet had actu-
ally grown about an inch, and it was no
60. The station was reached, when only
one foot was struck half way in the leg.
The fair Julia had encased her pedals slip
shop, and as ''time and tide and railroad
trains wait for no man." they gathered
their traps and went out just as they were,
to meet II crowd of frienCs assembled to
greet the newly y-wedded pair. AS the train
started, the brakeman came into the car,
81 tell you the boys at the depot
are having fun over that couple" We are
expecting every day to hear of the sudden
death of that shoemaker, and to see the
jury bringing in verdict of 'justifiable