Year: 1877

1t was a popular restaurant.


The seedv customer who had fingered
for half an hour over a doughnut revel,
brushed the crumbs off his pantaloons
with his four by six napkin, and
approached the cashier with an distracted
air. As he handed over his dime he
remarked:


" Mister, 1 think you and could do a
little business"


How sop said the cashier.


Why, / have noticed that the folks
who patronizs this hashery seem to go in
mostly for clam-chOwder, and beef, and
dOughnuts. They ignore the more
recherche elements of the meal, such as
quail on toast, and venison steak. You'd
realize more profit if the public partOOk
more extensively Of the ltixuries of the
season, so to speak, wouldn't you"


81 reckon" replied the check-taker.


"Have YOU ever noticed, }" continued
the seedy customer, that man is an
cumulative being He is guided and gov
erned by public opinion rather than his
own ideas"


Exactly"


Now do you see what l am driving
at? Public opinion, influenced by hard
times, says dOughnuts and clam-chOwder.
You want to educate public opinion UP
to the more elevated standpoint of quail
on toast, and venison steak"


"How are you going to do it?'


That's Just what l am coming to.
That's where my inventive genius comes
Ia. You and 1 put up job on 'em.
Every day about this time l COME here
to dinner. I look over the programme
and yell out, Here, waiter, turtle soup,
fried oysters, pate de tOi grdS, and pint
of RBderer,' and the waiter he sings out
the order so the whole room full can
hear. The folks that have just come in
say to themselves, Hello, this is a kind
of stylish place. 1t won't do to eat
baked beans and Goldfish balls here, and
then they follow my example; more
especially if the waiter does his part
well, and can infuse tone of sarcasm
into his voice when passing along the
order for clam-chowder and hash, so as
to make the cheap feeders feel their
insignifcance. Things would soon work
around if some enterprising man would
set the example"


Well" said the cashier, "you, or
anybody else can order just what you
like, providing you pay for it."


I'm afraid you hardly appreciate the
importance of my idea. In order to in
augurate the system it will be necessary
to disregard the immediate pecuniary
outlay. Now, my proposition is that L
should Officiate as epicurean exemPlar.
| will soon rouse the spirit of emulation
by my apparent reckless extravaganza.
l will, by reveling in the delicacies which
would appease the appetite of Lucul-
lus, stimulate others to like lavish lndul-
gence. / shall assist the process by cast
ing around me glances of scorntuI
depreciation at those grOvelling souls who
persist in partaking of humble fare.
Here, now, for instance, l assume an air
of lofty disdain. Do you think you
could sit calmly and eat clam soup while
l was looking at you-O-and devouring
boned turkey"


"No, I should probably get up and
kick you" was the answer.


"Ah. but most men would take it
differently. They would say, guess
I can afford to eat boned turkey as well
as that fellow and they would order all
the luxuries they could think OE 1t
would catch 'em, / tell you. Now, to
come right down to business, l amt am
bilious; I don't ask any salary. All that
I want is to order what like free gratis,
and III set right to work and we'll bring
about the biggest revolution in public
opinion you ever saw. What do you
say? Is it a bargain?


:'I can't see as it would exactly pay
me" said the restaurant man, " guess
things have got to work around grad
ually."


q You don't seem to have much enter.
prise" sadly observed the ePicurean
exemplar. What kind of one-horse
beanery is this, anyhow? You may put
down venison and quail in your lying
programme, and hanged if l believe
you've got any in your old chowder-
mill. I'll offer my services to some first
class establishment Boston Traveller.