smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1879

A very fayorite trick adopted at Lima, Peru, in carnival time, for frightening people as they pass along the streets, is the following: A sack filled with frag- ments of broken glass and procelain, is fastened to the balcony by strong rope, of such length that, when suspended from the window, the sack is about seven feet above the street. The apparatus being ready, mischievous maid and her anadta (young mistress) watch the passers-by until they select one for their victim. The sack is then thrown over the front of the balcony, and deafen- ing crash ensues, though the rope pre- vents it's contents from hurting any one. It. is we'll known that in almost every street in Lima there is at least one bal cony ready prepared for the performance of this trick; yet the suddenness of the crash always proves shock, even to the strongest nerves. People start and run to the other side of the street, and are sometimes so terrified that they drop down; then loud laughter and jeering remarks are heard in the balcony. Every year this trick is prohibited by the police, but the prohibition is treated with contempt.
Year: 1879

The proprietor of popular restaurant in Berlin has instituted what he calls the dinner of the golden sausage, tbe great attraction of which is the inser- tion in every thirtieth sausage designed for his guests of small gold coin, which becomes the property of the individual to whose lot it chances to fall. It is quite study to observe the guests seated round the numerous tables, each accommodating thirty persons, all of whom are moving their jaws most eau tiously. Of those favored by fortune, some are unable to conceal their satis faction, while others try to convey the coin unperceived from their mouths tc their pockets. As g matter of course, every one is obliged to masticate hif food slowly, instead of bolting it in the natural fashion, otherwise the tiny golden coin might slip down his gullel unaWaTes.
Year: 1879

The wife of certain we'll known rancher living near this place has got the true grit. Her husband was away on business whole week recently, and one day while he was absent the pump gave out. The nearest neighbor lived a long distance, so she hoisted up the pipe herself, and found that the trouble lay in the suction leather, which was too much worn to work properly. Away she went and cut a new one, using the old one as pattern. On returning, she found that large hog had fallen into the open well. Nothing daunted, she got a strong rope, made a slip-noose, fished it around the squealing porker, and then lifting as hard as she could, made the end fast to the curb, thus raising the animal partially out of the water and preventing it from drowning. She then harnessed horse, hitched him to the rope, and in less time than it takes to tell it, that hog,

 All dripping with freshness, arose from the

 well.

 But before the rescue of the parent animal, two of her offspring, crowding too close to the curb, probably to sym, pathize with their mothers distress, lost their balance and were now foun dering around in the water at the bottom Instantly the hog was rescued, oul heroine set about the recovery of the pigs. She procured ladder, which, however, though long enough to toucl the water, was not long enough to reacl the bottom of the we'll. Necessity ii ! the mother of invention, and procuring fence rail she thrust it through tho top round, resting both ends on tho curb. Then climbing down the hang ing ladder she rescued the two pigs bringing both safely to the surface This done she quietly completed Etht job by putting in the new suctior leather, lowering the pipe into the we'll 1 closing the curb and pumping water fol her weeks washing. g.-Livernaore (Col. | Her0ld.
Year: 1879

Startling stories are told in New York select social circles of recent cases of mistaken identity in clothing that, many ladies think, appear like downright stealing on the part of certain women who move in good society. It is said that lady cannot leave valuable outer garment in the dressing room, when she attends an evening party or "tea at the house of a friend, with any certain ty of finding it on her return from the drawing-roon. Tn it's place she very often finds garment of the same gen eral texture and pattern, but shabby and unpleasantly venerable with wear and age. This general resemblance, however, in the event of the person who made the substitution being discovered, is made tho excuse for the substitution, and the lady gets her own again with many apologies. So frequent are these cases that it has become positively un- safe to leave shawlsor sacques even un- der the surveillance of merely the maid stationed to aid ladies in their toilet. A well known lady lately left a e, ,OOe camel ls-hair shawl in the dressing room of fashionable house only to find on returning, in it's place, one faded and with torn fringe. By acting with nerve and telling the hostess that she would be held responsible, the shawl was recovered. Another lady, not so firm, found that, during her ab sence from the dressing room, an ole and dingy sacque had been substituted for her handsome fur-lined cloak. Sh' submitted to the situation in silence and meekly and mildly went home il tho old sacque. The person who tool her fur-lined cloak has not yet discovere' the mistake.
Year: 1879

A young man who was kicked of the front doorstep while endeavoring to serenade his girl, by her enraged papa, was too cautious to call him an old pirate, but he didn't hesitate to desig- nate him as free booter.
Year: 1879

Clock work is not more regular than the liver; the stomach, and the bowels when they are put in order with Dr. Mott's Vegetable Liver Pile, a suprsmely effective and safe alterative, cathartic and blood depurent which promotes thorough bilious secretion, regular habit of body. sound digestion and nervous tranquility. It is the best possible substitute for that terrible drug, mercury. For sale by all druggists
Year: 1879

The question of water along the
Southern Pacific Railroad has be-
come one of great Importance.
Water has been found by sinking
and boring wells, but it is not
suited for railroad uses. The water
of the Gila river can be readily
forced up by the steam pumps to
the line of the road which is, in
many places, not more than two or
three miles distant; but that water
is not altogether desirable for use
In locomotives. Preparations are
now being made for boring an ar
tesian we'll to n depth of 1900 or
1000 feet. Men and material for
that purpose are due here from CAL
ifornia at any day Yuma SEN
tinel.
Year: 1879

him come because bis stomach was
so weak, but he finally ordered
mince pie, plum pudding and ices
cream, with cup Of coffee. They
were brought and deyoured, and
then he called the waiter and made
her a confidential communication
to the effect that he had been sick
with dyspepsia, that his stomach
was weak, he couldn't eat every
thing, and would she bring him
bowl of milk?


The milk was brought, he crum-
bled some bread therein, and as his
younger companion had departed,
the man with the weak
stomach remarked to the gen.
tleman across the table from
him that it was darned rough to
have to come down to bread and
milk, but he had been sick. lie
couldn't eat everything, and he had
to be careful.


And now the landlord is anxious
for that man to come around when
he is we'll. He needn't come but
once.
Year: 1879

Having gone into other business, I now offer for sale first class well boring and rock drilling machine. The machine is almost new. It can be seen at the Ice factory. Good live stock or other first class property will be taken Tn exchange for 1t. Call on or address George Lount, Phoenix.
Year: 1879

Agent for DOMESTIC PAPER PATTERN 224 J Street, SACRAMENTO By sending Bust measure, length of sleeves, length of skirts. a SURE FIT IN LADIES' SUITS can be secured.

 Ladies will bear in mind that it takes but Three Days for a letter to reach Sacramento, and Three Days more for an answer making the time only Six Days altogether.
Year: 1879

Boys, if your were German boys and
should be caught smoking you would be
locked up. In Germany the government
has become anxious about the injurious
effects of tobacco on the physique of the
soldiers in coming days, and in order to
rectify in some measure the evil, has or
dered the police to arrest all under 16
found smoking on the streets, and to
have them punished by fine and impris.
onment. This will have a beneficial in
fuence in more ways than one. Accord
ing to reports resulting from government
Investigations among the boys attending
the Polytechnic schools of Paris, clear.
ly defined line has been discovered be-
tween the smokers and the non smokers,
the latter being decidedly superior to the
former in general scholarship and in
mental vigor. The poisonous nicotine,
so far counteracted in the adult smoker
by the resisting forces of his matured
physical constitution, lays hold of the
forming nerve tissues of the young, and
does it injurious work without hind
rance. Smoking cannot be put down by
act Of congress, but it would be a great
improvement if the German custom of
apprehending all under l6 found smok.
ing in the streets could be put in force.
Year: 1879

A religion is good only so far as it
moulds the life. The statement so flip.
PANTY made that Christianity offers to
save men by faith, without regard to vir-
tue, is made by ignorance or malevolence.
Over past sins repented Of it does profess
to cast the mantle of. forgiveness when
the sinner offers Christ's atonement as
his plea. And there is no sin so bad, SO
low, or so perennial, that Christianity
despairs of saving a man from it. But it
saves him from it, not with it. If it is
possible to construct a higher system of
ethics than that of the Sermon on the
Mount; if it is possible to set a purer
morality and benevolence and sincerity
before men than the example and pre-
cept OF Jesus Christ, the man has not yet
risen who can accomplish it. The man
who believes or teaches that any one is
offered salvation by the New Testament,
without an earnest and sincere struggle
to be pure and honest and true in every
act and function of his life, is not entitled
to ordinary consideration as a critic or a
man. | have read in the New Testament
In vain if there be in it, in terms or i'm
plication, the slightest announcement
for any phase of dishonesty or rascality


for the man of immoral life, of insincere
profession. of smirched and rotten repu-
tation. His encouragement begins when
these end. And if any one believes him.
self to be Christian, while there are
dozen men with pockets full of his due
bills and house bills, dodging him at eve
ry corner, | am constrained to say that
either he or the New Testament has made
mistake. The very groundwork of
Christs religion is sincerity, transpar-
ent life, as open to men as to God, who
knows all the secrets of the heart. The
Gospel tells US that we shall all be iudg-
ed and give an account of the works
done in the body. Take one of these
protesting Christians whose name is on
the dead roll, not of the saints, but of
the suspended Grocers' Exchange, and
what will he have to say for himself
when those figures confront him there2
Year: 1879

A Partisan told his boarding house
keeper that the coffee had only one great
nerit and one great fault: the merit that
it had no chicory in it and the fault that
there was no coffee in it.
Year: 1879

through many wears OF endurance.


have never heard from the gentlemen presenting
the charges directly indirectly, single suggestion
to who or what manner of man should take tho
place of the present incumbent IL he should be re-
moved But IL the allegations Of the clerk in this
respect were all true, they would avail nothing
against the plain language OF the law. II would give
him right to sit in Judgment upon their motives
in seeking TO examine tkese books. Tho clork
does not the books nor the Office which
he holds. The Office and its contents belong 10
the people of the whole county without distinction
Of party. Every citizen of the county has the right
under the law examine those books. The clerk is
but the agent and servant OF the people, chosen to
administer the duties Of Office established. not to
benefit its occupant. but to accommodate the whole
public II any believes suspects that the clerk
rs in any respect bctraying his trust IA such agent.
that he Is cxactng fees which tho law gives him
right that no is ncglccting to account for them
as the law provides any such person mas right AZ
books. The refusal to allow him to do 20 lest no
should use the information which he may acquire
against the Clerk is no reason why they should bc
refused him. IL the books correct and fhe con-
duct of the Clcrk has been right the more they
examined the better for him. His refusal 10 exhibit
them is therefore not only violation of the law,
but also suspicious circumstance IN ITSELF


VIOLATING THE LAWS.


Thtrd-Docs the Clerk transmit TO the Comptroller
monthly transcript OF tho accounts required to DO
kept by him and verified as required by section TO-,
chapter 4sa of the laws Of lst7 above qnc,saY ..
the answer show that this requirement Is habtu-
ally disrcgarded. The accounts aud their vorih-
cations which returned to tho Comptrollcr
are Ut the best awkward and clumsy evasions
of the law The Clerk himself in bis answer dis
Claims oil responsibility for tho faulty phraseology
in which they expressed. lie claims that both
are due the person who held the ofllco Of Comp
trollcr In 1868 and that the form and vericsfion
have been ratified both by the present Comptroller
and his immediate predecessor. The responsibility
cannot thus be shifted from the Clerk to the Comp
troller, who IL only authorized to direct
the form OF the accounts With the ycrinca-
ton the Comptroller has nothing TO do.
It's substance IL fixed by the law to which
the Clerk In bound to conform. Besides no such
affirmative rahcatlon by the two Comptrolers last
named is shown, aud IL is incredible that there
should have been any. assume that their attcil-
tion was mover called to tho form aud verifScaton
Of those accounts which arc 81 the best inere
Year: 1879

1t is greatly to be desired that a good and
simple method may be found Of recording
and measuring with some accuracy the var


ations of daylight throughout the day.
This would render the weather record more
complete and ii has an important special
bearing on plant physiology. An attempt
OF the kind has lately been made by Ger
man, Herr Krcuscr, who has had made for
him, by Licbcrtz, IN Bonn, an apparatus
with the following arrangement 1t con-
sists of drum fixed with its axis in the
plane of the meridian, and adjustable so as
to be at right angles to the suns rays This
drum has its border divided into twcn-
ty-four hours, twelve noon and twelve mid
night being in the meridian plane. A strip
of paper, scnstizcd with solution of bichro-
mate OF potassium and having divisions
which correspond to those on the drum, is
placed round this A second drum closely
surrounds the first, and is turned by clock
work from which it can be dctachctD once
IN twcnty-four hours in the direction of the
suns apparent course. The second drum
has slit for admitting light to the paper
its width is such that any point on the pa
per is exposed twenty seconds as the slit
passes over. The whole apparatus is placed
in the open air under an open glass bell lar.


lls arrangement gives llltle trouble the
paper strip has merely to be placed in its
right position at night or under artificial
shade (to avoid coloration), n,.d the outer
drum slid over and 80 attached to the rota-
ting axis that the 'insulation slit" is op-
positc the hour then present. The slit then
begins to move round the inner drum CORE
spondingy to the suns course. The i'm
pressed slip, when removed in the evening,
may be ''ixed' by shortly dipping in water
and drying between blotting paper, or it
may not, being quickly read it shows u
mostly continuous succession of bands of
various shades of black, or rather brown.


For comparison, Herr Krcuslcr made scale
OF 10 degrees of darllcning, exposing strips
of the paper given time under different
angles of incidence of light. Bands of the
experimental strip that appear homogeneous
arc now measured with reference to breadth
(minutcs and scconds) and intensity, (by
comparison with the scalc), and the sum of
the products of these quantities is taken rs
measure of the action of light rays falling
on the instrument in a given time. The
results arc considered highly satisfactory.
Year: 1879

One Of che most remarkable inven-
tions of the times is now being per-
fected and experimental upon by AL
fred Wilkin. For several months Mr..
Wilkin has been trying to study out
some more speedy and economical
method Of elcvating grain IN bulk than
any now in use. The results rs already
shown by his yet imperfect model, arc
astonishing, and promise to work al
most revolution in the grain.carry-
ing trade. Tho principal male use in
this curious little machine is simply
that of atmospheric pressure, or the
exhaust process which has lately hcen
applied with such wonderful success
in the great Westinghouse atmosphere
lc brakes. The model which Mr.. Will
kin has used SO far is small air pump
rather rudcly constructed, yet answer
ing for all practical purposes at pres
cnt. Connected with tho pump is a
one inch tin pipe, syphon shaped and
at the elbow or top (some three feet
above the pump is cylinder some
what larger than the pipe and connect
ing both parts Of it. Inside OF this is
sp'allcr perforated cylinder, while at
the lower end of it Is valve through
which the grain drops out. The other
arm of the syphon is extended down
into the grain pile. When tho machine
was first ready to be started some
wheat was put in common envelope
box to represent the car or vessel, and
the grain was sucked up at a rate that
was perfectly astonishing. AS some
one remarked, cat this rate the COM
plete machine would draw the insidcs
out Of a vessel in less than no time"
This was making an elevation of about
five feet, and some who viewed the re-
markable effects of the crude air pump
reasoned that 1t would ne possible to
raise grain only about thirty-two feet
or as high rs the air would ustain a
column of water. But without argu-
ing the case, Mr.. Wilkin quietly had
lot of sectional pipe made and planting
his machine in tho third story of the
custom house, forty feet from the
ground had the satisfaction Of seeing it
take up the wheat and corn ont of the
box placed on the ground as easily as
the whirlwind would take up the dust
from the dust from the road. The next
step was to place the air pump in the
fourth story, over fifty feet from the
ground, where tho result was similar.
The only drawbacks were the mechan-
ical defects in his appliances. This
settles the question about raising grain
to great heights by atmospheric pres
sure. The rcciprocating pump will be
supplantcd in practice by powerful
blowers. which, with their continuous
action, will exhaust the air 80 rapidly
the manufacturers think, that an eight
inch pipe will give all the pressure ask
ed for by the inventor.
Year: 1879

When | met Simpson one day after !
had hccn absent from the city several
months | noticed that he had dcprcss-
ell look and that he wore wig. l
asked him the reason for assuming q
wig, but he said, "Ncver you mind i"
and appeared to want to avoid tho sub. &.
jcct. When reached my Office asked
him in, and | pressed him to tell me
what was the matter. Finally he con-
scnted, and locking the door and pull
ing down the window blind, he said


"You know old Partridge, the Phrc-
nologist?''


eyes"


''You know he has an awful pretty
daughter, Sally"


eyes"


"Well, sir, was in love with that
girl, and thought she loved me. And
so, one day, called at Partridge's
place to kind of sound him to see If
stood any chance. And the old man
you know, he was little reserved, but
he told me that any man who wanted to
get favor from him could do so by
permitting him to shave off his hair and
to map out his scalp. You know, he
wanted living subject to lecture from
instead Of plaster bust.''


"Well, you sec was wild about his
daughter, so like an immortal idiot I
let him practice OH me. He took off
every hair clean, and then got stick
of caustic and laid out nay scalp in town
lots, with picture in each reserva-
ton. Just look at that! Isn't it infa-
nous ?'


Simpson removed his wig. His head
looked like gobular checker board with
frescos of the most amazing and hide
Gus character daubed into each square.
There was prize fight in progress
upon his bump Of combativencss two
black doves that looked like buzzards
were billing upon his bump ofamative-
ness; grimy angel, with parasols
for wings, stood ON his vencraton
bump; and on his bump Of philo-
progenitiveness there was what ap-
pearcd to be a comic picture Of "tcn
little Indians standing in q line" 1t
was the most startling spectacle ] ever
behcld, and said to Simpson


sold fellow, pity you -


"Pity me! Ilumph Why, blame
It, man, do you know that those fres-
Goes will never come Off Carry 'cm
to my grave, just rs they are. And
then, you know Partridge wasn't satis-
fed with that. lie said that my bump
of acquisitivencss was a great deal too
small. And when l asked him what
he was gong to do about it, he said it
must be swelled up somehow. He said
If he ever had son-in-law it must be q
man whose acquisitveness was strong,
SO that fetched me, and told HIM to
go ahead. He first proposed saving
out square inch Of my skull and set
ting in bump that would about meet
his views; but 1 was q little shy, you
know, and so he said he could either
emp mo like the man In Marryatt's nov
el, or else work mo up somo sort of a
bump by hydraulic pressure, ,::or suction,
or something"


Cd d he do iLp"


"Well, all know Is that was kept
In that office for four nights and three
days with q bucket on my head, put
there to hold the machinery down ;
and that was so delerious most of the
time that he had to strap mo to a book
case. When came to, found that
had bump over my ear as large as a
four cent loaf of bread, and old Part
ridge, you know, was standing there
exclaiming, 'Splendidl Splendid y and
decorating it with a caricature in caus-
tic Of miser prasnlnp a bap Of onld I
Year: 1879

EDITOR HERALD: The unpar-


alleled interest manifested for and
against the proposed Constitution
causes the greatest anxiety among
conservative men. Upon thorough
and impartial examination of the
Old and new documents fail to dis
cover any great difference, and 1
predict that the success OF either
will prove a great disappointment
to the winning party in the effect
it Will produce upon the country.
The adherents of the new Constitu-
ton imagine that monopolies will
oe strung up In harness, and made
to obey the dictates Of the masses,
that the rich will have the taxes TO
pay and the poor will be relieved,
that money will flow freely, and
everybody will have plenty. There
never was greater mistake. IF
they succeed there Is nothing In
the new Constitution that warrants
any such belief. Tho only items in
the new Constitution that would
justify the hope Of controlling mo-
Year: 1879

leaders) are not now, nor have they
ever been, the friends OF the peo-
Pile; this Is an acknowledged fact
throughout the entire State, but
more noticeable Is it In this
county. They are like unto the
fresh horse flies that the fox in the
fable feared, with this exceptions:
They all had their chances at the
poor fox once before, but In order
to obtain The largest amount Of
blood in the shortest posi- BILE time,
exhausted their power Of suction
and swooned away.


Reflection No. 2. They are now
assuming the part Of the hedgehog,
not, however, to relieve the fox of
his present sufferings, but merely
to get another chance at him
themselves.


Reflection No. 8. With their past
experience and whetted sppetites,
God help tho poor fox.


Reflection No. 4. VIII even the
tail be left?