Year: 1879

VARIETY.


There is very little use in making to-day
cloudy because tomorrow is likely TO be stormy.


A bad boy becomes bad man about as easily
and almost as inevitably as q tadpole becomes o
frog.


Chicago ITi6zne-'' Sitting Bull is first in
war, fr5t in peace and first in the hairs Of his
cou1trymen."


There is only one better thing than to appear
tc be virtuous and happy, and that Is to really
be so.


Good men should make no fuss in dying
When you shuttle of this mortal coil do not do
10 with double shuttle.


The immaculate purity of politics is indicated
in the Buffalo Express by the modern motto OF
ofice-holders, - United we steal, divided We
can't"


The Boston Transcript wants mules to be put
eastoFs- Did the Transcript never sec a mule
castor leg out for a man rs If he were n short
stop baseball player?


the New York Herald, likes to hold n woman's
hand in his own We can't see why he
shouldn't prefer piece Of pie"


Yung Wing has been presented with son by
Mrs. Yung Wing. The old folks are just as
Yung as they used to be. Boston Posi-. Yes,
and they sail through life Wing and Wing.


IL is said that the laws Of nature are always
consistent with themselves. This can hardly be
true, since many a man who sowed wild oats has
been known to reap hemp instead.


Fortune very closely resembles q coy young
girl who is playing young man as he would
play trout. If she finds that you have the
pluck to be indifferent she is apt to bcstow her
smiles, but If she sees that she can break your
heart she will do 1t just for the pleasure of
mending it again.


The elder Rothschild was n man Of great inde-
pendence OF character, and had very little pa
iience with the oVerbearing manners of the
nobility. One day the Due de Grammont called
on him when he was writing. The millionaire
lfted his head, nodded, and asked the visitor to
take chair. The Due was not accustomed to
such a reception, and said with hauteur, " Mon
sleur, am the Due de Grammont." Roths-
child lifted his eyes once more from his writing
and replied, "Ah, is that so? Then please take
two chairs"


II you wish to investigate the peculiarities Of
an infuriated indigestion just indulge in the
luxury Of Welsh rarebit before retiring In
the course OF q couple of hours you will be
driving through Russian forest with pack Of
wolves at your heels, and your journey will end
BY a tumble over precipee several thousand
feet high, with jutting crags here and there,
against every one Of which you hit in your
Descent
introducing US to n vivid panorama OF that kind
every time we disobey.


verv stupid man, but one not conscious Of
hrs stupidity, once said to Jerrold in a moment
or misery, - What was l made for?' The wit
rsplied. with more frankness than poiteness,
"WeH, sir, 50 far as I can judge, you were
made simply for the purpose Of digestion"
When Speaking or the same individual to a mu-
tual friend he expressed his opinion of him in a
VarV pithy, If not very fattering way: Z" Sir"
be said. ~ he Is fool OF just twenty-four carats
ii. E., without alloy.


MANY n man cau bear great grief who Gnds
IL impossible to endure a small one He
stand face to face with complete bankruptcy,
and feel a certain broad-shouldered satisfaction,
but 10 put out the gas when retiring for the
niehs and then stumble against n chair or hit his
ba-e foot against the corner OF the bed Is an
uerienee which not one man in the thousand can
hear with Christian fortitude- IL there are any
bad words which hid themselves in a corner Of
vour soul when you were converted they are sure
10 be ready for use at such n time as that.
There are only few expressions In the English
language which can do justice to the occasion.


The world is so constructed that the most dan
Verous thing FOR n man to do is to speak his
mind freely and honestly. The golden rule works
admirably here for it commands US TO do TO
others as we would like them to do TO US. Now,
what we really long for from others is q bit OF
delIc1te u1LteIyS " sNS -
seems like the unvanished truth. Ii helps q man
wonderfully TO be told just the shade of the
shadow Of on untruth. Candid people who de-
Light 10 tell others what they wouldn't relish If
others told them, are o nuisance. Still there IS
limit beyond which language would become
confused, for, as the poet says:


II by their things should call,


II surely would be proper


q singing piece bavi,


A dancing piece n hopper.


Once upon o time, Hosea Ballou and Lyman
Beecher met to compare Calvinism and Univer-
saIism. Both were Bible men, and each came
armed with textual missiles. After several
Apostolic blows from each, shrewdly parried by
the other. Beecher opened to the ninth Psalm and
read 8. The wicked shall be turned into He'll,
and all the nations that forget God" % There,
air. the wicked ore in He'll; get them out, if you
can." Hosea BaIIou, calm as a Summer morn
ing, pointing the twentieth Chapter OF John g
Revelation, read: ' Death and He'll delivered up
the dead which were in them" There, said
Father Balou, ''they are out get them IN
again, If you can y


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