smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1878

TIE funeral of the noted German So
cialist Heinsch, at Berlin, was attended
by 10000 men and women wearing their
party colors in red ribbons and flowers.
To avoid all resemblance to ordinary
funerals the men smoked as they went or
stopped by the way to take beer. The
gate of the Socialists Cemete ry, where
he was buried contains the inscription
"There is no hereafter and no meeting
again" Their motto is "To get all you
can out of this life and leave Christianity
for the Hottentots. Bee.
Year: 1878

THE oldest recommendation OF snowy
new hotel lately opened in the metropolis
is 10 be found in its advertisement in the
shape OF a quotation from one of the daily
papers: Nothing in London approaches
Punch.
Year: 1878

TEE President has formally accepted
the last completed section Of thirty four
miles of tho California and Oregon Rail
road ending at Redding, and a patent for
ihe land grant will soon be issued.
Year: 1878

Teach YouR BoYs.-Teach them to res.
pect their elders and themselves.


Teach them that God helps those who
help themselves.


Teach them that true lady may be
found as often in calico rs in velvet.


Teach them that one good, honest trade,
well mastered, is worth dozen professions.


Teach them that to wear patched clothes
is no disgrace, but to wear "black eye" is.


Teach them that as they expect to be
men some day, they can not too soon learn
to protect the weak and helpless.


Teach them that common school edu.
cation, with common sense, is better than
a college education without it.


Teach them that "honesty is the best
policy that it is better to be poor than
rich on the profits of "crooked whisky"


Teach them. that it is better to be an
honest man seven days in a week than to
be christian one day only and william
six days.


Teach them that God is no respecter Of
sex, and that when he gave the seventh
commandment lie meant it for them as
well as their sisters.


Teach them that by indulgng depraved
appetites in the worst forms of dissipation,
they are not fitting themselves to become
the husbands Of pure girls.
Year: 1878

INTENDED TO WRECK THE MErR6roIIs-
Either there is a conspiracy against Capt
Ankers among the ships company of the
.Hrqpolis, or he has betrayed his completely
in a great crime No less than four
members of the crew testify that the Cap.
tain said to them at different times that he
had carried out the instructions given him
by the owners; they had adjured him, if
he had any accident, to "make a good
wreck of her And the ships carpenter
says he called Captain Ankers's attention
to the unworthincss of the ship, and was
merely cautioned, in reply, to say nothing
about it. The fair inference is, if this testi.
mony is true, that the owners were tired of
repairing this rotton hulk, and wanted "a
good wreck" made of it, that they might
get the insurance and part with the ship
forever The hundreds of lives which had
been intrusted to it do not seem to have
been considered at all. 1t is needless to
say what grave accusation is made by
these four witnesses, who are supported to
a certain extent by the fifth 1t is simply
charge of premeditated murder by whole
Tribune.
Year: 1878

BEING HAPPY.-There are two ways of
being happy. We may either diminish
our wants or augment our means; +; either
will do, the result is the same; and it is
for each man to decide for himself, and do
that which may happen to be the easiest
II you are idle, or sick, or poor, however
hard it may be to diminish your wants, it
will be easier than to augment your means
lfyour are active and prosperous, or young
and in good health, it may be easier for you
to augment your means than to diminish
your wants. But, If you are wise, you will
do both in such way as to augment the
general happiness Of society.
Year: 1878

This is free as well as a glorious country,
and every man has right to believe what
he likes; ; but it is not always iudicious to
express that belief with a stark naked
candor Professor Burgess, for instance,
has low opinion Of the political capacity
of women According to the C5lmJ;a
Spectator, lie used this similo in a recent
lecture: " As the Republican has reached
down and elevated the negro, 50 perhaps
the Democrats would. in time. find it to
their advantage to reach down further and
elevate even women to the rights Of citi-
i1enship. If the Professor really believed
that American women are little lower
than the negroes in intelligence, it was not
necessary to say SO and set the classroom
in roar.
Year: 1878

This reconciliation of silver


Is something, fear wife, lest
In score of yeGrs farming an striving


I'll not understand with the rest
Ofth folks who can give an opinion.
Ofhand. which way is best
To solve the great problem of money,


And 50 readily get rid of their debts.
of course l read the papers, and ponder
Over the arguments as they are spread
against imitation and partial repudiaton


With hard. honest money instead.
But the ideas these arguments evoke,


ON this reconciliation scheme,
Takes brains and deep study to cope


And find out what they all really mean
To-day though | made sad bundcr.


While down at the mill with the griSt.
In testing the conditions, which under.
I thought. in this Bland bill to exist.
NeghbOr Gray and were discussing


The measure down there at the MILL
And Gray, tho religious, came near cuSSing
Both Houses for passing the bill.
lie spoke of the lasting diShonOr.


Now attached to our name abroad.
How them high-minded, aristocrat foreigners
Would cut us as clean as Il board
Why, look at the absolute meanneSS


In the Government issuing those bonds
Then going about seeking TO redeem them
With silver. instead of with coin.
Just then, thought of the balance


Gray owed me on last years account;
so. not wishing to show ignorance by silence
In what We were talking about.
! intimated something about settling;


That his views heartily endorsed
still I'd take ninety-tw0 cents in this silver,
Losing something by doing So of course.
Gray Redeemed but made no allusOn.


Uutil kindly extended my hand
Then he answered with evident confusion,
Ill settle when We reach Hard PAN" !. Il.
Year: 1878

Piety," remarked an Arkansas preacher
to his congregation the other day, "does
not consist in noise. The Lord can see
you give to the needy just as easily as he
can hear you pray the roof off"
Year: 1878

The defeat Of the effort to reduce the
tax on whisky in the House at Washington
is triumph for the Republicans, who made
the fight on that issue. The constant
changes in the tax on whisky are really
speculative operations meant to make
money for somebody.
Year: 1878

The glass manufacturers have joined in
the cry for foreign market The capacity
of the works represented in the Protective
Association is fl ,l2j tons but the product
last year was only 24,4SO tons, and yet
there was surplus. This is an article in
which our manufacturers can compete
with the world.
Year: 1878

\ schooimaster who had an inveterate
habit of talking to himself, was asked what
motive he could have in doing SO. He re-
piled that he had two good and substantial
reasons. In the first place he liked to talk
to sensible man; in the next place he
liked to hear a sensible man talk
Year: 1878

The Congressman who is willing to father
q bill for the enlargement Of Agricultural
Commissioner lie Due into full.sized
Cabinet officer, has been found. He has
the pastoral name of Muldrow, and he
comes from the peaceful state Of Missis-
sippi, where the shotgun is looked upon as
an agricultural implement.
Year: 1878

Thi, is one of the latest stories about the
Pope: Not long after the Popc's return
to Rome in $50 beautiful young English
lady was out sketching with maid near
the Porta Pia. The Pope came out in his
carriage, descended, and began to take his
usual walk. The maid having gone to ask
his blessing, returned TO say that his Toli-
ness would gladly give his hand to be
kissed to her young English mistress.
Indeed. said that lady. with toss Of her
heretical head, think my hand better
worth kissing than his The Pope, who
had approached unseen. and overheard this
speech, laughed gently, and said. to her
great confusion, That is perfectly true ;
but you will allow an old man to bless YOU
nevertheless,
Year: 1878

The following story selected from an
eastern teacher, may be applicable in all
climes and by all people:


There was once beautiful damscl 1p.
on whom one of the good gcnii wished to
bestow a blessing He led her to the
edge of large field of corn, where he
said to ncr:


:" Daughter, in the field before us the
ears Of corn, in the hands OF those who
pluck them in faith, shall have talisman-
ic virtues, and the virtue shall be in pro-
portion to the size and beauty of the ear
gathered. Thou shalt pass through the
1leld once, and pluck one ear. 1t must be
taken as thou goest forward, and thou
shalt not stop in thy path nor shalt thou
retracc single step in quest of thy
object. Select an ear full and fair and
according to its size and beauty shall be
its value to thee as q talisman'


'The maiden thanked the good genius
and then set forward upon her quest
AS she advanced she saw many cars Of
corn, large, ripe and beautiful, such as
calm judgement fmight have told her
would possess virtues enough; but in her
eagerness to grasp the very bes she lett
these fair ears behind, hoping that she
might find one still fairer At length,
as the day was closing, she reached a
part of the field where the stalks were
shorter and thinner and the ears very
thin. and shrieved. She now regretted
the grand ears she had left behind, and
disdained to pick from the poor show
around her, for here she found not an ear
which bore perfect grain. She went on,
but alas, only to find the stalks more
and more feeble and blighted, until in
the end, as the day was closing, and the
night coming on, she found herself at the
end of the field without having plucked
all ear OF any kind


. No need that the genius should re
buke her tor. her folly. She saw itclearly
when too late, as how many IN all climes
and in all ages, in the evening of life call
sadly and regretfully to mind the thou
sand golden opportunities forever lost
because they We're not plucked in their
season.
Year: 1878

President Bascom, who presides over
Western college to which young ladies,
as we'll as young men, are admitted, has
recently expressed his warm approval of
the coeducation of the sexes, and has as
serted that girls are better students than
boys, for the reason that they are better
adapted to sedentary pursuits. In other
words, he claims that girls can sit down
more successfully than boys, and that
this fact enables them to surpass the 9TH
er sex in study and in whatever business
or profession involves a large amount of
sitting down. Far be it from us to dis
pute the learned Presidents facts. Doubt
less he knows whereof he affirms, and
we should carefully concede that the
members of the gentler sex are unequaled
in the capacity for sitting down. Still,
the differences which. President Bascom
draws from this fact are not necessarily
true. A person, Of whatever sex, NAV be
able to sit down to an immense extent
and may, nevertheless, be wholly unable
to study. The professional fat man and
fat woman spend the greater part of their.
lives IN the sedentary occupation of being
looked at and pinched by curious people
but they have never, in single instance,
been noted for scholarship. AS for the
theory that because girls are peculiarly
adapted to rocking chairs they should
therefore be admitted to young mems
colleges, there is abundant reason why We
should unhesitatingly reject it.


While girls unquestionably have their
uses in the economy of nature, and pos
sess merits exclusively their own, it may
be boldly asserted that they are totally
unfit to pursue in company with young
men the studies which constitute the
curriculum Of every respectable college.
One of the earliest studies of the Fresh
man year is the art of getting the jani-
tors COW into the fourth story of the dor
mitory. This can be readily mastered by
any young man Of good abilities and hab-
its of industry aud perseverance; but be-
tween girls and cows there is great gulf
fixed. The girl, from her earliest youth,
looks upon the COW as ferocious beast,
prone to keep young ladies in the air in
positions fatal to the proper arrangement
OF the back hair. To suppose three or
four young lady students are capable of
the complicated pushing and pulling nee
essary to induce COW to climb several
flights Of stairs is to suppose that the nat
ural feminine fear Of cows can be eradi-
Year: 1878

A BEAUTIFUL PARLoR ORNAMENTAL
beautiful parlor ornament for the sitting
room can be made hy covering a common
glass tumbler with moss, the latter fasten.
ed in place by sewing cotton wound round
Then glue dried moss upon II saucer, into
which set tumbler, filling it and the re.
naming space in the saucer with loose
earth from the woods. Plant the former
with variety of ferns, and the latter witt
wood violets. On the edge of the grass
also plant some of the nameless little ever
green vines which bear red (scarleD ber
ries, and whose dark, glossy, ivy-like foil
age will trail over the fresh blue and white
of the violet with beautiful effect. Another
good plan is to fill rather deep plate with
some OF the nameless but beautiful silvery
and light green and delicate pink mosse,
which are met with in profusion in al
swamps and marshes. This Can be KEEP
fresh and beautiful as long rs it is not neg
lected to water it profusely once II day.
must, of course. be placed in the shade, OF
the moss will blanch and die. In the cen.
tire of this cump of large azure violet.
should be placed, adding some curious Ii.
chens and pretty fungus growth from the
barks of forest trees, and few cones
shells and pebbles.
Year: 1878

SUPPLANTING.-Who ever saw the last
flickering of the spark of life. or heard the
sound of the handful of dust, cast down
into the grave, who did not wish from his
heart that the evil word had never been
spoken. the evil thought never entertained,
the evil deed never done, the evil never
repaid with evil; that the intercourse of
life had been carried on in love, and the
dealings of the world sweetened all along
by mutual forbearance and gentleness?
Who doth not wish it, long for it? Alas
we cannot pray for it; for even prayer
avals not to undo the past. But who
would then forego all he ever gained, if he
might be again us he was in the days of
his youth, whenever he thinks of some un-
gentle, unkinJ unforgiving, undutiful un-
seemly act Of later life.


If over the grave Of an Isaac, or an
Esau such thoughts have arisen in the
heart of one who hath been what Jacob
was to them, let him remember, that to
supplnnt or deceive is n bitter root, and
must trouble II man all his after days.
But to forgive and be forgiven is II bless
cdness that can be attained only,while life
lasts, while hand can clasp hand, and eye
beam on eye, and words Of Kindness be in
terclanged. The grave closeth, stilleth
all IN silence never to be broken, save in
empty dreams and idle wishes poured
forth ever afterward in vain. Therefore,
let us take heed betimes, while kind and
pleasant Offices can still be exchanged, and
life and its varied interest continue, that
we may call forth the hearts best affec-
tions, that we may kindle zeal and feryor
in our soul towards our felow-men; for Il
day of gloom succcedeth in which there is
no longer space for these dispositions tc
grow.-RoJertSOD.
Year: 1878

The sentiment of envy or jealousy with
respect to the attainments or accomplish
ments of others, is rs needless as it is hate
full. If any man has his mind on doing
good, the amount of good waiting to be
done in the world is so great. and the
amount of evil waiting to be removed out
of the world, that he can never have any
occasion TO fear that any other person will
perform the whole work and leave nothing
for him. Contrarywise, right minded men
must welcome every helper, and rejoice in
the courage and vigor of every ally that
many enter the field. And the man, with
al, who finds himself disturbed at any ac-
complishment of good by any other person,
may be sure that there is at least one work
of good very necessary to be wrought, and
open peculiarly to himself, and the whole
glory of which he may have for his own,
and that is the removing of this odous and
disturbing disposition quickly and out of
his own heart, CongregationaliSt.
Year: 1878

WASTE AND WANT.-Either man must
be content with poverty all his life, or else
deny himself some luxury and save to lay
the base of independence in the future
But if II man defies the future, and spends
all he earns (whethcr his earnings be one
or ten dollars II day. let him look for lean
and want at some future tme-for it will
surely come, no matter what he thinks.
To save is absolutely the only way to get
II solid fortune; there is no other certain
mode Those who shut their eyes and
ears to these certain facts will be forever
poor, and in their obstinate rejection OF
truth mayhap will die in rags and filth.
Let them so die and, thank themselves
But no! They take sort of rccompense
in cursing fortune. Great waste of breath
They might as well curse the mountains
or the eternal hills. For we can tell them
fortune does not give away good and sub
santial goods. She sells it TO the highest
bidder, to the hardest and wsest worker
for the boon. Men never make so fatal II
mistake ms when they think themselves
creatures of ftte It's the sheerest folly in
the world. Every man may make or mar
himself, whichever he may chose. For
tune for those who by diligence, honesty,
frugality. place themselves in II position to
grasp hold of fortune when it appears in
view. The best evidence of frugality is
the five dollars or more standing in your
name at the savings bank. The best evil
d ence Of honesty consists in diligence and
frugalitV.
Year: 1878

To TELL THE Hour OF DAY OR NIGHT.
Sling n shilling.or sixpence at the end
of II piece of thread by means of a loop
then, resting your elbow upon n table,
hold the other end of the thread betwiXt
your forelinger and thumb, observing to
let it pass across the ball Of the thumb,
and thus suspend the shilling in an empty
goblet. Observe, your hand must be per-
fectly steady. and if you find it difficult to
keep it in an immovable posture, it is use
less to attempt the experiment. Promising
that the shilling is properly suspended,
you will find that when it has recovered
its equilibrium it will for n moment be
stationary it will then of its own accord,
and without the least agency from the per-
son holding it, assume the action of n pen
dulum, vibrating from side to side of the
glass, and after u few seconds will strike
the hour nearest the time of day; for in
stance, if the time be twenty-five minutes
past six, it will strike seven, and so on oi
any other hour. 1t is necessary to observe
| that the thread should lie over the pulse
of the thumb, and this may in some meas.
ure account for the vibration of the shil.
ling. but to what cause its striking the
precise hour is to be traced, remains un.
explained, for it is no less astonishing than
true, that when it has struck the proper
number its vibration ceases, 1t acquires 8
kind of rotary motion, and at last becomes
stationary as before american Youn1
! Folks.
Year: 1878

Some women are 10th to credit their
husbands with good intentions, or to give
them credit due their genius and enter
prise. Such woman lives on Adams
Avenue. She was fairly crazy about cera-
mics, but in the midst of her pottery deco
rations she WIS summoned TO New Eng
land to sec n dying relative. Her hus-
band. good soul. decided to ceramic that
house to the most complete extent during
her absence. and he invested enough
money in fancy transfer pictures to have
bought his winters coal.


He pasted old Roman heads on the new
ell-posts, bordered the edges of the stairs.
had paper monkey climbing up each leg
of the extension table, pasted an alligator
on each panel of every door, had sailors
tumbling over each other on the water
pitcher. ran border along the base board
of the parlor, pasted the teapot with red
roses, bordered all the mirrors with lean
dogs running after fat rabbits, and gum
med the head Of trotting horse on the
back of every chair. The panels in the
bcdsteads blossomed with girafles reach
ing out for weeping willows and serpents
trained around the legs of the piano and
shot mad glances ut small mules with their
heels in the air.


Some men would have stopped here and
waited to be patted on the back and en-
couraged to 90 ahead. This man only
waited to lay in new supply of pictures
and make some more paste. He whacked
Il dozen giraffes on the tea-kettle, two or
three of whom seemed intent on going up
the spout. fastened an elephant to the
handle of the spider, and made the. stove
boiler fairly howl with its burden of cam
els marching up and down with their
backs all bumped up.


When every door-knob had been orna-
mented with the phiz Of Queen Elizabeth,
and the family camphor bottle made the
groundwork for Spanish bull-fght, the
husband threw the shears and four knives
two spoons and his paste pail over the
alley fence and waited for his wife's re-
turn. She arrived the other day.


He sent her home in carriage from the
depot, and waited an hour or SO before
following her. When he thought she had
had time to thoroughly inspect his work
he went home. Several boys were play
ing on the walk, and as the husband was
unlocking the front door they saw u
woman's hand suddenly reach out, seize
his collar, and haul in on him, and as his
heels twinkled in the air voice filled
with emotion called out:


"Ill paste rhinoceroses on you till you
can't winkp


They are in scrape at that house-they
are scraping ceramics from the earth into
eternity Free Press.
Year: 1878

PUTTING CHILDREN TO BED.-Not with
a reproof for any of that days sins of
omission Or commission. Take any other
time but bedtime for that. If you ever
heard Il little creature signing and sobbing
in its sleep you could never do this. Seal
their closing eyclids with kiss and a
blessing. The time will come all too soon
when they will lay their heads upon their
pillows lacking both. Let them then at
least have this sweet memory of II happy
childhood of which no future sorrow or
trouble can rob them. Give them their
rosy youth. Nor need this involve wild
license. The judicous parent will not SO
mistake my meaning. If you have ever
met the man or woman whose eyes have
suddenly filled when II little child has
crept trustingly to its mothers breast, you
may have seen one in whose childhood s
home dignity and severity stood where
love and pity should have been. Too
much indulgence has ruined thousands OF
children; too much love. not one.
Year: 1878

STOVES. Coal AND GoLD.-Sloves are
of comparatively modern invention, and
were first used in the northern countries of
Europe. Ben Franklin was one of the
earliest writers on stoves and invented
some very ingenious forms of them, one
of which bears the name of the inventor.


Coal seems to have been unknown to
the ancients. 1t is not known at what
time it began to be used rs fuel England
was the first country where it was used to
any considerable extent, and it was not un-
til the end of the thirteenth century that it
was employed in London, and then at first
only in arts and manufactures. In 1917
its use was prohibited by Parliament on
the ground that it was injurious to health.
The high price of wood however, soon
compelled its general use.


Gold was in all probability one of the
earliest discovered metals. 1t was used
by the Egyptians and other ancient nations
for the same purposes as it is to-day. In
Genesis 1872, Abraham is said to have
been rich in cattle, in silver and in gold"
Its discovery is lost in the mists of anti
guilty.