Year: 1867

I am little boy about SO many


years old; / don't know whether I'm


a good little boy, but I'm afraid not
for / some times do wicked things,


and once / cut sisters kittens tail


off. with the chopin knife, and told


her big dog came along and bit it
off and swallowed it down before
kitty could say Jack Robinson, and


sister said she was sorry, and it must


have been a very naughty dog, but


my mother didn't believe me, and
said she was afraid / had told her


a lie, and I'm afraid / had so then
she asked me if I knew where liars


went to; and l said yes; that they


went to New York and wrote for the
newspapers she said no-they went
to the bad place where was nuthin'


but lake of fire and birthstone, land


she asked me if / would like to 90


there, and I said no! for [ didn't
think the: ed be much skatin' or
slidin' on that lake, and the boys
couldn't snow ball each other on
shore, and she said it was more than
that, just as though that wasn't bad
enough, for [ don't think they can
play base bah nuther; then she ask


ed me if l wouldn't like to be nan
gel and have harp, and [ said no !!


I'd rather be stage driver and have
a big drum, for | couldn't play on
t'other thing. So / shouldn't like
to be a nangel, for their wings must
be in the way when they go swim
min,' and play tag and leap frog !;
and besides it must be hard to fly
when one amt used to it, But it
would be jolly to be stage driver
and have a long whip and touch up
the leaders, and say "g lang there,
what are We doin' on!'' [ should
like that much better'n fyin' and
then mother said there was a dread
full stage of sin, and Bob hollered
and said 'that he guessed | was on
it," and then she whipped US and
sent us to bed without any supper,
but didn't care about any supper,
for they had'n nothin' but bread and
butter for tea, and Bob and l got up
and he lifted me in at the pantry
window, and we got mince pie and
q whole hat full of doughnuts and
they thought it was the cook stole
EN-, and sent her away the next day,
and Bob said he was glad of it, for
she didn't make good pies, and the
doughnuts wasn't fried enough, and
sometimes 1 do swear, for said by
golly the other day, and sister heard
me, and she told mother, and moth
er said was bad boy and would
bring her gray hairs to the grave,
and she whipped me, but | don't
think it did her gray hairs any good,
and it hurt me, and when / got up
stairs I said gol darn it, but I said
it SO she didn't hear me, and when
she asked me if I didn't think was
very wicked, / said / was afraid
was, and [ was sorry for it, and
wouldn't do SO any more, and then
she said I was a good little boy, and
told me about George Washington,
who cut down the apple tree, and
was caught at it, and said he did ii
with his little hatchet, just as tho
| hadn't heard all about it before,
and didn't always think he was big
stupid for euttin' wood when they
had a hired man about the house,
and Dublin his little hatchet, and be-


sides it would have been a great
deal jollier to let the trees be so he
could hsve stole apples off in the
fall. I don't care if he was the IA
ther Of his country, he wasn't smart,
and I'll bet you the boys in our
school would cheat him out of his
eye-teeth swoppin' jack-nives, and
could lick him and hardly try, and I
don t think he was very healthy Ell
tner for I never saw a good little
boy that wasn't always sick and had
the mumps and measles, and the
scarlet fever, and wasn't coughin'
1 all the while, and hadn't to take cas-
tor oil, and tar-water, and couldn't
eat cherries, and didn't have to have
his head patted till all the hair was
rubbed off by everybody that came
to his mothers, and be asked how
old he was, and who died to save
sinners, and what he had been stud
YIN at school, and how far he'd got


and lots of other conundrums, and
have to say his catcchism. no, ]
should not like to be a good little
boy, I'd just as lief be nangel and
be done with it, I don't think / ever
shall be a good little boy, and Other
people don't think so too, for
! want navpr calla1 a oood Iit+Jo hox