Year: 1878




hand, and holding plum cake on hi:
knee with the other, and looking across
the table into the bright eyes of his little
wife, wouldn't it be good joke to get
bachelor Bill Smiley to take widow Wat
son to Barnum's show next week ?"
You can't do it, Ed; he won't ask
her, he's awful shy. Why, he came by
here the other morning when was
hanging out the clothes, and he looked
over the fence and spoke, but when
shook out a night-gown he blushed like
a girl and went away"


I" I think 1 can manage it," said Ed;
but I'll have to lie just a little: But
then, it wouldn't be much harm under
the circumstances, for l know she likes
him, and he don't dislike her, but Just
as you say, he's so shy. I'll just go over
to his place to borrow some bags of him,
and il l don't bag him before 1 come
back, don't kiss me for week to come,
Nell"


So saying, Ed. started, and while he
is moving the fields, we win take a look
at Billy Smiley.


He was rather a COOK looking fellow,
though his hair and whiskers showed
some gray hairs, and he hal got in a set
of false teeth. But every one said he
was good old soul, and so he was. He
had as good hundred-acre farm as any
in Norwich, and new house and every
thing comfortable, and if he wanted q
wife, many girl would have jumped at
the chance, like a rooster on q grass
hopper.


But Bill was so bashful-always was
and when Susan Sherrybottle, whom
he was 50 sweet on, though he never said
boo " to her, got married to old Wat
son, he just drew his head in like mud
turtle into his shell, and there was no
getting him out again, though since she
had been a widow he paid more atten-
ton to his clothes, and had been very
the fair widow attended.


But here comes Ed. Wilbur.


Good morning, Mr.. Smiley


"Good morning, Mr.. Wilbur; what's
the news your way %


"Oh, nothing particular that know
Of" said Ed, only Barnum's show,
that everybody is talking about, and
everybody and his gal are going to. I
was over to old Sockrider's last night,
and see his son Gus has got a new buggy,
and was scrubbing up his harness. and
he's got that white-faced colt of his as
slick as a seal | understand he thinks
of taking Widow Watson to the show.
He been hanging around there a coed
out, would. Susan is a nice little woman,
and deserves a better man than that
young pup of fellow, though 1 would
not blame her much either if she takes
him, for she must be dreadful lonesome,
and then she has to let her farm out on
shares, and it isn't half worked, and no
one else seems 10 have the spunk tospeak
to her. By jingo, if l was single man,
I'd show you trick or two"


So saying, Ed. borrowed some bags
and started around the corner of the
barn, where he had left Bill sweeping,
and put his ear to a knot hole and lis
tened, knowing the bachelor had habit
Of talking to himself when anything
worried him.


COnfound that young Sockrider p
said Bill "what business has he there,
I'd like to know; got a new buggy,
has hel Well, so have I, and new
harness, too; and his horse can't get
sight of mine, and declare Pve half a
mind to-yes, 1 will III go this very
night and ask her to go to the show with
me. I'll show Ed. Wilbur that l amt
such calf as he thinks | am, if did let
old Watson get the best of me in the first
placep'


Ed. could scarcely help laughing out
right but he hastily hitched the bags on
his shoulder, and with low chuckle at
his success, started home TO tell the news
to Nelly; and about FIVE O'Clock that
evening they saw Bill go by with his
horse and buggy, on his way to the
widows. He logged along quietly,
thinking of the old slnging-school days,
and what pretty girl Susan was then,
and wondering inwardly if he would
have more courage to talk up to her,
until at distance of about mile from
the house, he came to bridge, he gave
tremendous sneeze, and blew his teeth
out of his mouth and clear over the
dashboard, and striking on the plank,
they rolled over the side of the bridge
and dropped into four feet of water.


Words cannot do justice to poor Bill
or paint the expression of his face as
he sat there completely dumbfounded
at his piece of i'll luck. After
while he stepped out of his buggy,
and getting down on bis hands
and knees, looked over into the
water. Yes. there they were, at the
bottom, with crowd of little fishes rub
bing their noses against them, and Bill
wished 10 goodness that his nose was as
close for one second. His beautiful teeth
had cost him so much, and, the show
coming on and no time to get another
set--and the widow and young Sock
rider.


Well, he must try and get them some
how and no time to be lost, for some one
might come along and ask him what he
was fooling around there for. He had no
notion of spelling his clothes by wading
in with them on; and, besides, if he did,
he could not go to the widows that
night, so he took look up and down the