smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1874

First, they are mere beady than ever,
and, secondly, when Portia said "the
quality of mercy should not be strain
ed" it is a pity SKI had not included
dress skirts. We are actually tied up
and bandaged by the skinny little skirts
fashionable this fall. We get on very
we'll in crowd, when the regulation step
is not more than three inches long. but
the curbstones here are, some of 'em,
five times that. And there are omni-
buses whose first step eventuates in the
vicinity of a short woman's breast pin.
Now, when one is securely settled in a
skirt like bloated pantaloon leg, and
furthermore has side strings that tie that
skirt tightly behind to produce the un-
wrinkled front so fashionable, she has
feat before her to raise foot before
her. Most ladies catch at the door and
give double barreled elastic skip that
lands both feet on the step. There they
perch and trust in Providence and the
passengers to pull 'en1 in. Everything
is jetted, and even into the silent city of
the dead go the beads and bugles, since
the last sweet thing man did here
lately for his mot Z law vas to box
her in robe of black satin fairly crust
ed with jet beads. Very likely there
was fat-iron in each pocket, but that
we didn't see.) That man had only the
week before told his wife he never felt
any thing like the weight of the bead
embroidery she wore. To an analytical
mind the chain of his meditation was
very clear.


Here in New York there are two dis
tinct types of fashionable women the
women who do and the women who
dare. The first chop dressmakers do
up the majority of our fashion-loving
ladies, but there are others who get
themselves up after outre fashion-plates,
and tremendous is the effect. The staw
and felt hats are rather old-stylish in
shape, but when a woman faces the
trrned-up front with pale blue, puts
cluster of tea roses smack in front, a
red breasted bird above that, and a
long tailed plume beyond that, then
las6es this creation on the back of her
head, cooked at an angle of forty-fve
degrees, then the deed is done.


Then the modistes put nice little
standing collars on dresses and slash
them open at the breast to show deli
cate laces and things. This fourth
proof fashionable builds a silk fence
aDOuG n6r neck GlaG lowers neaVonWaFU,
la5hes her beaded belt till her breakfast,
and any other affair she may chance to
contain, are collapsed like defective
fues. Then she bursts forth in revers
and plaitings and lace ruffles across the
breast till she's disproportioned as ruf-
fled pigeon. But one pucker does she
allow her dress skirt; that's behind.
AS this woman confronts you on the
street she has the appearance of one
with numberless spirit hands
to seek to detain her. Everything, |
from her hat to her boots, seems clawed |
at and about to be torn from her by in
visible forces in the rear.


To be in the rampagingist fashion
this fall, put on lots of cardinal red and |
look wild.-MrS. BurnhGn1 in the st. |
Louis Republican.
Year: 1874

From Surprise Valley, California,


comes the story of an old fellow who
got very jealous because his wife went
to ball with q good-looking fellow and
stayed out until broad daylight. The
old fellow went to a justice of the peace
and told his story. winding up with
81 ant you to help me, for that ar
thing has been going on about long
enough" "Well," says the justice,


"you can write down to Yreka and see
if some of the lawyers can't get you o
divorce" "Divorce - roared the angry
man, "who the deuce wants divorce ?"
Year: 1874

ONE woMAN's EXPERIENCE WITH SIX HUs-
BANDs.-A San Francisco woman, who has b ad
six husbands, has been rather unfortunate in
her selection OF them. The first ran away iron,
her, and is now high detective officer among
the Mormons; the second was hanged for M mr.
der; the third was sent to the penitentiary for
forgery; the fourth and fifth are In the same
place for burglary and highway robbery, and
for highway robbery. The woman saws she
never married CONGRESSMAN anyhow
Year: 1874

INDIAN CIVILIZATION AND CITIZENSHIP
Commissioner Burdette, of the general land Of


Gee, in his annual report, recommends a con-
sohdation of the homestead and pre-emptiOn
law, and also that Congress give validity t.
homestead entries granted Indians who had
abandoned tribal relation under a decision of
secretary Cox, but which was practically re-
verse by Secretary Delano. He also suggests
amendments 10 the homestead laws so as to in
vest this class with full right OF participation in
their benefits upon their severance of the tribal
relations as q step forward in their civilization
Year: 1874

DISTRICT GovRRNM EET.-A private meeting
Of leading citizens Of the District Of Columbia
Of both parties was held at an uptown hotel
last niR ht. The object of the conference was to
consult as to the best form of government for
the District. Among those present were law
yers, merchants and business men, and one or
change OF views the sentiment of the meeting
was found to be in favor Of the plan, which, il
is understood, has been substantially agreed
upon by the select committee on the District
This plan involves the abolition OF the suffrage
and the placing OF tho affairs Of the District
under the control Of the different departments
A number Of those present also thought that
the government should assume the back debt of
the District.-Wask. Cor. Bau Sun.
Year: 1874

IMPORTANT ORDER.-The Navy department
has issued order TO the effect that sea service
is not to be credited TO an officer except when he
is performing duty under orders from the
department, as part OF the complement OF
vessel OF war belonging to the Navy in commits
sion fer sea service and when attached TO the
coast survey for the thee only that he is actually
atlcat. No credit is TO be given for the service
in revenue or merchant vesSels. This order
will be printed in future navy registers as was
The q II n IN ncl lnSi
Year: 1874

ITHACA, Dec. 2S.-The Philadelphia detectives
who arrived here Saturday evening declare that the
boy thought to be Charley Ross Is not that IN
diyidual The case was carefully and admirably worked
up by the persons here who furnished the information
they having the fullest belief that they had the right
how bis the photographs OF the missing
hoy being striking.
Year: 1874

The Good Fellow is notoriously
careless to his family. ANY outside
friend can lead him withersoever he
will-into debauchery, idleness, vaga-
bondage. lie can ask favor, and it
is done. He can invite him into dis
grace, and he goes. He can direct him
into job of dirty work, and he i'm
mediately undertakes it. He can
tempt him into any indulgence which
may suit his vicious whims, and, re-
gardlcss of wife, mother, sister, who
may be shortened in their resources so
as legitimately y to claim his protecting
hand-regardless of honorable father
and mother-he will spend his money,
waste his time, and make himself a
subject of constant and painful ankle.
ty, or an unmitigated nuisance to
those alone who care q straw for him.
What pay does he receive for this
shameful sacrifice ? The honor of be-
ing considered "Good Fellow" with
a set of men who would not spend a
cent for him if they should see him
starving. and who would laugh over
his calamities. When he dies in tho
ditch, as he is most likely to die, they
breathe a sigh over the swill they
drink, and cay, "after all, he was
Good Fellow"


What foe the farmers have TO con
tend against in the potato bug is shown
by the experience of a man in Joliet,
Ill. He placed some in bottle eight
months ago. They have been exposed
to the extremes of winter aud summec
have had nothing TO cat, and are still
living,


A French paper is trying to prove
that one Jean Cousiu discovered
America four years before Columbus
arrived here.
Year: 1874

An artist found a model in a beg
gar, with splendid long beard-dirty
and unkempt-just such as he wanted
for some venerable, sanity person he
was going to put on canvas IN the old
style. He gave the man two pence;
and told him he could earn a shilling
a day if he would call at the studio
address so-and.so). The man called
next morning, and had cut off his
beard to make himself tidy and fit for
the artists society. The artist gave
him a penny, and told him to go away
or he would send the police after him.


The number of geese on Lake Cham
plain this spring is said to be uncom'
monty large. Bridal parties
Year: 1874

Here is story said to be strictly
true. During the late war, a French
General had upon his staff certain
volunteer civilian, who had several
times shown signs of unwillngness to
expose his person. One morning the
General said to him, Get on horse
back, sir; ride beyond our lines till
you see the Prussians; draw fre,if you
can; then. when you have made out
where their outposts exactly are, come
and report to me-" The gentleman
trotted for two hundred yards, pulled
up, and thought he would go no fur
ther. Finally, after quarter of an
hour of fear, he decided to ride home
again. AS he reached the cottage
where the General was waiting for
him, the latter looked up, saw him,
and exclaimed "What? not gone
yet? Start instantly, sir!" Thereupon
the individual in question glanced with
terror at the General. and after few
seconds of hesitation, turned his horse
sharp round and rode off a. full gallop
toward the rear. The General snatch
ed out his revolver, fired at him, ana
put a bullet through his thyoat. He
was carried to an ambulance, remained
there for six months, until, in the
excitement of the Commune, he was
quite forgotten. He then came out
with a doctors certificate, obtained
with that document the sympathy of
people who knew nothing of the facts,
and finally, on the ground that be had
been wounded before the enemy" oh.
tanned the cross.
Year: 1874

A few evenings since a colored
preacher and doctor in Memphis, Ten
nessee, was approached by darkey of
the commoner sort. The fellow asked
the doctor to go with him and he
would show him where he could get a
trunk full of money. The doctor went,
and near the orphan asylum his guide
halted and explained that the reverend
gentlemen was to take off his boots
and stockings and go barefooted to the
point named, while his new friend car
ried the boots around to the place by
a circuitous route. The doctor has
given up the search for the trunk and
is looking for his boots.


A Wisconsin woman who recently
buried her eighth husband has receiv-
ed an offer of 5000 to move into some
other STATE. She stands out for $1,000.


The Grangers Of Clark county, Ind,
have chartered bank, and will soon
have it open for business, lending
money TO farmers at $ per cent.
Year: 1874

"He is one Of the few journalists who
can put an enemy into his mouth with
out fear Of its stealing anything" is
the roundabout way adopted by Mil
waukee editor 10 call u brother editor
an idiot.


"Kind words are wonderful in their
way" says an exchange, but so far
as children so, bootjack cxerls a
more powerful influence.
Year: 1874

LAUGHTER AS A MEDICINE.-A short time
since two Individuals were lying in one room
very sick. one with brain fever and the other
with an aggravated case ofthe mump3. They
were so low that watchers were needed every
night, and it was thought doubtful if the one
sick OF fever could recover. gentleman
was engaged to watch over night, his duty be-
ing to wake the nurse whenever it became
necessary to administer medicine. In the
course of the night both watcher and nurse
fell asleep. The MI an with the mumps Law
watching the clock, and saw that it was time
to give the fever patient his potion. He was
unable to speak aloud or to move any portion
of his body except his arms, but seizng pill
low he managed to strike the watcher in the
face with it. Thus suddenly awakened, the
watcher sprang from bis seat, falling to the
floor, and awakened both the nurse and the
fever patient The incident struck the sick


men as very ludicrous, and they laughed
heartily at it for some fifteen or twenty min
utes. When the doctor came in the morning
he found his patient vastly improved said he
never knew so sudden turn tor the better,
and now both are up and well. Who says
laughter is not the best of medicines? And
this reminds the writer Of another case.
A gentleman was suffering from an ulcera-
ton of the throat, which at length became so
swollen that his life was despaired Of His
household came to his bedside to bid him
farewell Each individual shook hands with
the dying man and then went away weeping.


Last of all came a pet ape, and shaking the
mans hand went away also with its hands
over its eyes. 1t was so ludcrous a sight
that the patient was forced to laugh, and
laughed SO heartily that the ulcer broke and
his life was SSaved.-Sdnitdridn.
Year: 1874

PROPOSALS will be received until FRIDAY May
LIST, from parties who desire to contract with the
City of Portland for laying Wood Pavements for
the ensuing year. Proposals must state the price per
square yard of pavement laid the kind of treatment
proposed, if any, and name of pavement to be laid
the City to make all excavations and furnish sand for
foundations.
Also, from parties who desire to contract for
Granite Block Pavement to be laid the en-
suing year. Blocks to be 6 to 81 long, so to go deep,
3 to 4 wide; state price per square yard of pave
ment laid. The City to make all excavations and
furnish sand.


The Committee reserve the right to reject any or
all bids Proposals to be addressed


CHAIRMAN,
aD13 did
Year: 1874

On Saturday evening Sothern again
stepped on the London boards. Since
he went away every play at the old Hay
market seemed like Hamlet" with the
part of Hamlet left out. For con-
siderable time the old theater was closed
for repairs, and the admiration which
It's Pompeian decorations excited Satur-
day night proved how many had not
been there since their favorite left, for
the said decorations were made more
than a year ago. The building was
crammed to it's utmost capacity, and the
audience became rather noisy when the
hour (7:30) for the curtain to rise had
arrived, and the orchestra had not yet
begun. When the orchestra did begin
it had rather hard time of it, the crowd
calling " time" somewhat Justify. Its
labors to soothe the savage breast with
sweet sounds were not rendered easier
by the entrance of the Duke and
Duchess of Edinburgh, which was a
signal for cheering. The Duke and
Duchess, by the way, do not stand a
near view very well. He is rather rough
and red-faced, and begins to resemble
his mother in obesity; and the Duchess,
who never had any beauty to spare, IS
certainly getting no prettier very fast,
and is rather unpleasantly fat. They
both tried to preserve their royal dignity
under the siege of Sothern's humor, but
at length it broke down. The Duchess
hid her face behind the curtain of her
private box, and the cause could be in
ferred from the convulsive movements
of the SAID curtain and when Lord
Dundreary, prosecuting his courtship,
asked the embarrassed lady if she
could wag her left ear" the Dukes
forehead was seen suddenly to descend
to the velvet of the balcony before them.
Cor. Cincinnati Commercial.
Year: 1874

Take board four feet long, one and
a half feet wiue, bore an inch hole in
the center, about eight inches from one
end, saw out strip from this end to
the hole, about one inch wide, or wide
enough to admit the neck of the turkey.
Place this board on a barrel, with one
end against your hips. Lay the turkey
on this board on it's back, with its neck
in the slit and head underneath then,
with a snarp knife, cut its throat under
the board (that the blood may be out of
the way) ; take the turkey by the legs,
draw steadily, to keep its neck in place,
raise it from the board, that it need not
be bruised, and commence at once to
pull out the tail and wing feathers, and
by the time it is done kicking you will
have nearly all the feathers off, You
will find that they will come off nearly
as easy as if scalded. The pin feath-
ers, if any, should be taken out at once.
When dressed, carry to the house, lay
the carcass upon the table, on the back,
with its wings in position wipe dry,
and when you get through, call IN your
wife, and you may be sure of her APP
proving smile.
Year: 1874

A well-known and popular preacher
has put to press book with a sensa-
tional title. He made a point with the
publisher that his own parish should
have the first chance in buying the
book. He had over 1000 hearers, he
said, and each one would want copy.
An edition of 1900 must be published
before the book was thrown on the
market. The publisher not only agreed
to this, but withheld the book from
the stores, and sent on a special agent
to supply the ravenous appetite of the
congregation. The book arrived.
Public notice was given from the pull
pit. But there was no rush. The
rooms rented and the salary and board
of the agent cost something. AT the
expiration OF two months business was
closed up. The sale of books did not
reach the number of fifty. The pub
Usher said that the congregation ex-
pected that each one of them would re-
ceive presentation copy" from the
pastor BOSTON Advertiser.
Year: 1874

A big dog went into clothing store
with his master yesterday, and while
skulking around under the counters he
came upon the full-length mirror before
which customers stand to see the fit Of
a coat. The dog observed another dog
in the glass and he uttered warning
growl and showed his teeth. Two or
three clerks saw chance for fun, and
they slid around and in whispering
words encouraged the dog to sail in and
clean out the intruder. He hesitatod a
little, and one of the clerks poked him
up by throwing a box of paper collars.
That was enough. The dog thought
the dog in the glass had made pass at
him, and he opened his month, made a
dive and the glass was cracked in
twenty directions. There was a good
deal of laughing among three or four
clerks until they figured up and found
that each ones share would come to
about two weeks work.-DetroH Free
Press
Year: 1874

We find the following story in the
London academy:


The group of Islands known as the


Nicobars, situated about l5Omiles south
of the Andamans, has been but little ex-
plored, though the manners and Gus
toms of the inhabitants OF these islands
offer interesting peculiarities. One of
the most noticeable, and one which Sc
riously affects the trade of the islands,
is the passion for old hats, which per-
vades the whole framework of society.
No one is exempt, and young and old
endeavor to outvie each other in the
singularity of shape no less than in the
number of old hats they can acquire
during lifetime. On fine morning
at the Nicobars it is no unusual thing to
see the surface of the ocean in the vicin-
ity of the island dotted with canoes, in
each of which the noble savage, with
nothing whatever on but the conven-
tional slip of cloth and a tall, white hat
with black band, may be watched stand
ing up and catching fish for his daily
meal. Second handed hats are more in
request, new hats being looked upon
with suspicion and disfavor. The pas
sion is SO well known that traders from
Calcutta make annual excursions to the
Nicobars with cargoes of old hats,
which they barter for cocoanuts, the
only product of the island, good, tall
white hat with II black band, fetching
him forty-fve to sixty-five good cocoa
nuts. Intense excitement pervades the
island while the trade is going on.
When the hats or the cocoanuts have
come to an end, the trader generally
lands a cask or two of rum, and the
whole population in their hats get
drunk without intermission until the
rum also comes to an end. 1t is curious
that in those far-away regions so profit
able market should be found for cast
off specimens of one of the most dis
agreeable symbols of civilization.


The same yearnings after better things
in a more advanced stage may be OBJ
served in Madagascar, where no official
is content if he cannot deck himself out
in the plumage of some long defunct
Admiral, General or Ambassador.
Year: 1874

Very often a screw hole gets so worn
that a screw will not stay in. When
glue is handy, the regular carpenter
makes the hole larger and CLUES in a
large plug, making nest for an entire
ly new hole. But this is not always the
case, and people without tools, and in
an emergency, often have to fix the
thing at once. Generally leather is
used but this is so hard that it does not
hold we'll. The best of all things is to
cut narrow strips of cork, and fill the
hole completely. Then force the screw
in. This will make as tight a Job as il
driven into an entirely new hole.
Year: 1874

NEW YORK, July li.-A Springfield


dispatch, giving an account of the burst


ing Of the reservoirs in Massachusetts


Sunday, says the discovery OF the leak


was made by Bacon Harry Meacham,


an old gentleman who has been one Of
the Lawmakers of the State, but whose


name will be remembered from this day,


not as that of Solon, but as the Collins


Graves OF Blush Hollow. At four
o'clock Sunday afternoon Meaeham, who
lives shout quarter OF a mile from the
upper dam, visited IL, feeling anxious
lest the IOng-eontinued and heavy rains
had weakened its walls. The dam ap-
peared to him at that time all right, but
noticing that the water was rising very
rapidly, he bethought him that possibly
the dam on the little g oose pond on q
small brook emptying into this reser-
voir had given way, and he went up
there to investigate. Coming back after
finding that all was right, and again sur
veying the dam, he was about to turn
away satisfied when ne was horrified to
see a heavy landslide on the lower slope
of the dam. Knowing at once what
this meant, he got OFT his horse, mounted
him in haste, and dashed down to Blush
Hollow, carrying the alarm Of the coming
waters. The warning was quite swift
enough, giving st least ten minutes for
the escape Of men, women and children
to the hillside. At the end Of about ten
minutes the tiume gave way and well
of water sixty feet wide, covered with
caps Of snowy foam, rushed through
Skinnersville with rOer, and descended
Main street with more than the force Of
an Alpine avalanche. The terrified peO-
pie, happily through the forethOught of
Deacon Meacham, stood on the hillside
in safety and watched the progress Of the
destroying wave in terror and apprehen-
sion. Leaving Main street it branched
eastward, rolled down in rear Of houses
into Blush Hollow and on to the adjOin-
ing village, repeating the ravages de-
scribed at the time OF the Mill river dis
aster. Houses went down like ten-pins,
trees were torn up by the roots and car
ried along by the wave, and even the
surface Of the earth was torn and fur
rowed as with mammoth plOw. For
half an hour the Good maintained It's
mighty force. At half past four o'clock
in the afternoon It reached the lower
dams. This influx broke the sec
Ond dam, whose waters poured forth
to add to the power Of the wave.
The waters carried away one
wooden bridge in the center of the viii
lage, more or less damaged the fOunda-
tiOns Of the dams and stocks Of several
manufacturing establishments and quite
ruined many fields and gardens. Below
this village the foods chief damage,
outside of that done to the railroad, was
the carrying away of a bridge st Rolling
Brook, and then it gradually lost its
force and power Of mischief. The en-
tire damage done by the food is roughly
estimated at three hundred and fifty
thoUsand dollars, and the estimate is a
moderate one, not including persons
thrown out of employment, and the en-
forced idieness Of the place.