Year: 1864

THR editor of the Lacrosse wis., Democrat


has been having his "phiz' taken He thus


describes the moaus opsrandi


Yesterday we visited the royal, imperial,


fve-barreled Photograph Girlery of Heath


It is common to say gallery, but we deem ii


the most politest to say girlery. Selah !


Heath was in. So was his girlery. About a


hundred editors have written us for our pho


tograph, and editors wants must be supplied


you know. 1t is big thing to sit for a pho


tograph -torealize that you are to transmit


your liniments to posterity on piece of card


board. After a great effort to decide as to


the size Of the great representation of the


great living, we escorted ourself into the dis
secdng room. Graciousl what a lot Of traps,


blue curtains on stills, and suchl We anch-


ored firmly in cane-bottorned chair. Heath


fixed our head back in pair of warped tongs.


Then he screwed thumb-piece, and the


whole kadoddle olamped US just bait the ears.
Then he yerked the chair about about two
and one-sixteenth inches to the starboard-
then an inch to the rearward-then frac-
tional part Of less than half an inch to the
front, and told US to sit. He is a big chap, so
we sot and sot till we nigh onto TUX root
Then he went off to sort of patent beehive
on three stills and dressed his head in mourn
ing. Then he pointed brass stivo pope
hole at us-raised patent Gap to his maohin-
icus-wrapped his head in black bag-yank-
ed and yerked the brass hole holder to the
right and leIt-told Us to hold still--stuek a
double-geared slase-frame into chasm in his
contrivance-told US to look at a red COB of
sealing wax on abroom-handle-yerked out
a gold coated timekeeper-toOk the apron
from the shooting end of his machinicus and
let her went 1t didn't hurt much, though he
could feel the shadow as itleft the substance
ereit faded Says he e-'aH right" and he
yerked the apron over the thing aud disap-
peared behind blue door with brown knob !
on it, as the moon goes behind cloud We
followed him in. He was glad to see us-for
he whispered in thunder accents 'shut the
door" We suffered. The room was some
darNy. A consumptive lamp was making
light Of the performance. The room was no
bigger than fatman's grave, and it was ram
up full Of things. Heath took out of the slate
frame a pane of glass about 6xl0. He souSed
it into a dish OF wet stuf--drizzled out long
brass cock little more wet upon it-dipped /
it into tub Of swIll-rinsed it off with bot
tie of soap suds-poured some golden syrup
on it from tin canister-changed ends with |
it and squirted some hair oil stuff out Of big
bottle-rinsed it all off with cold pepper
sauce from tureen-gave it another baptism
in some yellow starch--bailed it over the con-
lamp before menhUned-warmed it
over hot iron, and there it was, large as life
and as natural as a four leaf clover.


Then he showed it to US, and sure enough
we remembered Of seeing chap who looked
ust like the result of all this performance
Then we came out oil the Opaque closet aud
he gave it another rinse from another bottle,
rubbed its edges with his fngers-squirted
some more photograph on it. and buried it in
| barge-shaped yellow pie-dish in about an
nch of moisture, and told US to call in week,
when we could have hat-box full Of photo
yraphsl Wen call sure. Before this visit,
he art of Photographing was a mystery
low we understand it perfectly, as all who
,ead this item will of course.