smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1868

lady writer, who is slightly disposed to
turn traitor to her sex, states that there are
things woman can't do-the most imnor.
tant admission that has been extorted from
the sex since Madame Eve ate the apple
Hear the following " open confession


FIRST she can't sharpen lead pencil Give
her one and see. Mark how iaggedly she
hacks away every particle of wood around the
lead, leaving an unsupported spike of the
latter, which breaks Immediately when used.
You can almost forgive the male creature
his compassionate contempt as chucking her
under the chin, he twitches it from her awk.
ward little paw, and rounds and tapers it in
the most ravishing manner, for durable use.
| wish to hear no more on that point, because
whea once make up my mind, "all the
Kings men" can't change it.


We'll, then. secondly-a woman can't do
up bundle. She takes up a whole newspa-
per to do up a paper of pins, and coil of
rope to tie it, and it will come undone Mt
that. When | go shopping-I look on with
the fascinated gaze of bird in the neighbor-
hood of magnetic serpent to watch clerks
do up bundles. How the paper falls Just
into the right crease how deftly they turn
it over, and tuck it under. and tie it up, and
then throw it down upon the counter as if
they had done the most common thing in
the world, instead of deed which might,
and in faith does task the ingenuity of an
gels" 1t is perfectly astonishing.


Thirdly may allude to the fact that a
woman can't carry an umbrella or rather to
the very peculiar manner in which they per-
form that duty; but l won't. When they
unfurl the parachute alluded to, they put it
down over their noses, take the middle of the
sidewalk, raking off mems hats and women's
bonnets as they go, and walk right into the
breakfast of some wigit, with that disregard
of the consequent gasp, which to be under
stood must be felt, as the offender cocks up
one corner of the parachute and looks def
antly at the victim who has the effrontery to
come into the world and hazard the whale.
bone and handle If her umbrill"
Year: 1868

A STORY FROM PARIS A Paris letter tells
the following story of Twelfth Night fete
in that city:


A wealthy family in the aristocratic bou-
levard Malesherbe were amusing themselves
in seeking the Kings. portion, or the ring In
the festival cake, when a lady of the compa.
ny says to the hostess


' l wish my portion to be given to the
poorest little boy we can find in the street."


The servant was dispatched on this freez-
ing night. and not far from the house he
found ragged urchin trembling with coll
and hunger. He brought him up, was
ordered into the saloon where thousand
lights glittered and sparkling fire gladden.
ed and surprised him. He drew his portion,
which the benevolent lady had promised,
and, as luck would have it, the fellow found
the ring beans they use in Paris instead
and, of course he was king" They all
shouted that being a King he must choose
Queen. He was asked SO to do, and look.
ing round the company, he chose the very
| lady who had proposed to cede her porti on
OF cake. lie was asked why he chose her.
| He said


L don't knowl She looks the most like
mother!''


Mother; whose mother2''


MY mother! never knew her. but was
stolen away from her, and here is her por.
traitl'


With this he drew out of his ragged coat
likeness, which proved to be that of the
very lady herself, who, in Italy, had her
child stolen from her, and now he turns up
a poor little ragged Savoyard, dragging
along miserable existence in Paris, while
his mother, by en- intuition, perhaps, felt
that In the air near to where she was, was
one so dear to her.
Year: 1868

A HORRIBLE DREAM REALIzED.-Our read
ers will recollect the account which we pub.
lished the other day of the terrible death of
Mr. Ehrler, of this county, who was crushed
by rock, wHile mining near Mineral Point
We learn from the Mineral Point Tribune
that Mr.. Ehrler had a dream the night
before the accident, amounting to present
ment Of what followed. He was so impr sss-
ed in his dream with the idea that he was
being crushed with a rock that be got out
of bed while yet asleep and called for some
one to remove the rock which was crushing
the life out of him. He related this dream
to his wife on being reused from his sleep.
She tried to prevail on him not to go to the
diggingS that day, but he remarked that it
was only dream, and promising to be care.
full went to his work. and his dream was
realized Galena (M.) Gazette
Year: 1868

FROM Mr.. THoMAs.-We have used Henley s
Royal Balsam in my family this winter. There is
no use talking. 1t throws everything in the shape
of Cough medicine in the shade that 1 ever saw.
My wife troubled with asthma or smothering
spells for years, and could get nothing have any
effect until struck this "Royal Balsam" She is
now about. well. 1t cured me of the worst cold
l ever had in my life in one night. Whenever our
children have anything like a cough, few drops
given on going to bed-that is the last of the
cough. | never intend to be without it in the
house.


B. THOMAS, the paper man.
Year: 1868

THREE of the officers of the Fourth Regi-
ment saw the other day, at Fokada, an oper-
alton which was described by Bruce, but
which has been denied by all subsequent
travellers, and by the Abyssinians themselves.
This was the operation of cutting a steak
from the body of living OK. They came
upon the natives just as they were in the act
of performing it. The unfortunate bullock
was thrown down, and its four legs tied
together. The operator then cut an incision
in the skin near the spine, just behind the
hip joint. He blew into this to separate the
skin from the flesh, and then cut two other
incisions at right angles to the first, and then
lifted a flap of skin four or five inches square.
From this he cut lump of flesh, cutting with
the knife under the skin, SO that the amount
of flesh taken out was larger than the portion
uncovered. The operator then filled up the
hole with cow dung replaced the flap of skin,
plastered it up with mud, united the feet of
the poor animal, who had kept up a constant
moaning while the operation was going on,
gave it a kick to make it get up, and the
whole thing was over. | should mention that
the operator cut two or three gashes in the
neighborhood of the wound apparently as a
sign that the animal had been operated upon
in that part. The officers observed that sew
eral cattle in the same herd were marked in
a precisely similar manner. They returned in
half an hour and found the animal walking
about and feeding quietly. l have not men.
toned that it bled very little at the time the
operation was being performed.
Year: 1868

The Stockton Independent thinks it strange
that Irishmen in America should support the
extreme views of the South by their alliance
with the Democratic party, when it is well
known fact that the Southern Confederacy
embodied in its Constitution a provision
whereby foreigners could not vote until they
were residents twenty FIVE years. Oh I! that
is not the strangest part of the business, MIR.
independent nor the saddest either.
Year: 1868

OvERFED.-A story of Theodore Hook is
told to the effect that at some civic banquet
on the appearance of fifth course of dainties
Hook laid down his knife and fork, and
declared that he would take the rest in
money.
Year: 1868

Challenges the world to produce anything in the
shape of Medicines that will remove aud eradicate
Cough or soreness in the Chest, prompt, nc
matter what form the disease might assume. Hen
ley's Royal Balsam" is the best Medicine in the
world for Bronchial or Pumonory affections. For
Group or Hopping Cough, there is nothing on
earth that can equal it. All motherers and Nurses
ought to have bottle close by them, it will give
a child relief in two minutes. 1t is entirely veg
etable, and will prove blessing to the human
familY.
Year: 1868

To bury a friend ia winter is a kind
Of trial that connects strange Inward
emotions Of feeling which is difficult
to master, We have cleared away the
snow, and heWn a passage down
through the solid pavement of the
frost, and then In that inhospitable
places we come to bury our DEPART
ed; be it child or wife, or mother, OF
much loved friend, our heart shud-
ders In convulsive chill at the forlOrn
last Offices we are come to perform.
While our feeling Is protesting, the
solemnity, So o-called, goes on, and be-
fore we have gotten our own consent
the tribute of respect" is ended.
The frozen chips Of earth, loosened
again By blows, are piled on the loved
ones rest, and we turn to 90. will
il storm to- night2" The wind, alas I
is hoWling even now in the trees, and
the sleeting is already begun. O.,
God, It shall not be ! We are going to
be foods, we see, but now the spell is


broken. Our departed is not in that
hole, and we scorn to say our farewell
over 1T. Let the SHOWS fall heavy, if
they will, and the winds rage pitiless
and wild above, ours ID shall be TO
thank The, Father, Lord of the


Warmer Cline, that our dead one
lives with Thee Practically, almost
nothing will more surely COMPEL a
q faith In mortality, even if one
chances to be unbelieving, than 10
bury a friend in the winter. And as
matter Of fact, it is not in the fresh
out-bursting life Of the spring or in
any other softer season of the year,
that we do at the winter funerals. We
ask it instinctively, as we do a fire for
the cold.-[Dr Bushdell.
Year: 1868

Weary, weary, oh, how weary


Is she Of the cold worlds strife
Dreary, drearys oh, how dreary


Is the path Of her sad lifei
Grim the phantoms that pursue her


Ever ever night and day
Whispering dark words unto her


Chasing hope and faith away.
Not a trusted friend is near her


In the world she stands alone
None to sOofhe her-none to cheer her


Wronged, uncared for and unknown
GaZes she upon the water


Dazed her brain and Wild her eye
BreRthes the prayer her mother Taught her,
And then plunges in te die
Rash the deed, but judge her kindly,


Ie who gaze on hOrrided-
Had she never loved so blindly,


She would never thus have died.
Raise her form, all bruised and broken.


Lay Il gently meath the sod
Let not one harsh word be spoken


Leave her fallings all with God
Year: 1868

FTVhe Frame house and lot situated the south


side OF William street, at the west end Of the
covered bridge. The lot contains about two acres
Of ground. lying on William street aud along th
cient on William street 20 make three lots in all
This property viii be sold cheap and on easy
terms, an opportunity seldom offers for getting
acres OF ground within the corporation and
prominent street., for the price this can be pur-
chased Apply to
Year: 1868

a Warehouse and lot on Franklin street, north
~ Of williams street, east side. The warehouse
can be fitted up into a comfortable and roomy
dwelling, its size is IS by so feet, the frame and
floors are excellent, any one desiring house cry
centrally located, viii find this can be mad q
good home and at cost OF about one half Of q
dwelling house in the same vicinity. Apply to


ROBT. F. HURLBUTT, Real Estate Agent
Year: 1868

The Presidents message which We
print this morning speaks for Itself
The opening portion Of the document i8
more insulting TO Congress and the
country, and more false in fact than
anything ever before contained tn an
An1erioan State paper, and the Senate
did quite right IN refusing TO hear the
idiotic TRADE read IN their presence
The message constitutes q &c closing
chapter in an administration that iE ln-
famous. 1t is the farewell yell Of rage
uttered by a man who has not friend
In the nation, and whose every plot
against the welfare Of the country has
been baffied, Whatever Of the message
Is not venomouB, iB commonplace ana
uninnportant. Andrew johnson can
now begin packing his trunks for the
mountain Businesses Of East Ienna naiiaaa'
Year: 1868

that a reduction of the paper circuIa-
ton Of the country until il appreciated
to the specie standard, was the true so
luton Of our financial problem. But
as this policy was emphatically con-
demned by Congress, and IL is now too
late to return 10 It, he recommends the
following measures as the next best
calculated to eject the desired result


COIN CONTRACTS OUGHT TO BE LEGAL
Year: 1868


the South. We ask at your hands,
we demand of you, the ruling men of
the nation, accountability for these
crimes we will continue TO demand
at your hands an answer TO these
charges. IL is Of you we ask, where
is our country Broken, discovered
and shattered, we ask you to give it
back. Had you given us what you
could have given us, the Constitution
ofour country, the Union of the States,
peace and prosperity would have now
pervaded all the land taxation would
have been light; the black man would
have enjoyed the fruits of his own
labor; the white man would have
occupied the place God designed him
to occupy in the Government of this
Republic. But your great dogma is
that the black man is to have the
power; and the Senator from Brad
ford Mr.. Landon1 very eloquently
alluded last night to the rainbow aud
its prismatic colors, and the drops that
made up the great arch, and his con
cluding sentence would imply that
black was one of the component colors
in the rainbow.


Mr.. FISHER. Will the Senator allow
me to interrupt himl / will answer
his question. / understood the Sena-
tor, last night. to say they we're Dem
ocrats when they went into the army;
it is to that ] was referring He asks,
what are they nowY | will answer
that question with great pleasure. A
very large majority of the bounty
jumpers and deserters were Republi-
cans, or rather were Democrats.


Mr.. WALLACE. The Senator unfor.
tunately struggles against the truth.


Laughter.


But all this is aside from the main
question on hand tonight. Senators
90 too far when they enter the field of
general politics. The simple question
before us is whether the man whom il
is sought TO praise by these resolutions
should be endorsed. As | said last
night, he is the representative of an-
tagonism to the ideas we hold. He
is the representative of that party
who believe in striking down our free
institutions. am unwilling to place
upon the records of this Senate any.
thing that will indicate that / sustain
him in the slightest particular.


| have said all | intend 10 say on
this subject / would not have en-.
gagged the time of the Senate had il
not been for the attack upon me and
those ! represent.
Year: 1868

THE OLD MAN.-Bow low thy head
boy do reverence TO the old man
once like you tho vioissitudes Of life
have silvered his hair and changed
the round merry face TO the worn
visage before you Once that heart
beat with aspiration co-equal TO any
that you have felt, aspiration crushed
by disappointment, as yours perhaps
is destined TO be. Once that form
stalked proudly through the gay
scenes of pleasure, the beau-idoal OF
grace; now the hand of time that
withers the flowers of yesterday has
wrapt that figure and destroyed the
noble carriage. Once at your age, he
possessed the thousand thoughts that
pass through your brain, now wishing
to accomplish deeds equal TO a nook
in fame; anon imagining life dream
that the sooner he awoke from the
better But he has lived the dream
very near through. The time to ava
ken is very noar at hand; yet his eye
ever kindles at odd deeds of daring,
and the hand takes a firmer grasp OF
the staff. Bow low the head, boy, as
You would, in your old age, be reyer.
enced.
Year: 1868

A LOYAL FRAUD.--The St. Louis
correspondent of the Cincinnati
Inquirer says: "There is no telling
the ways that men, greedy for gain,
will not avail themselves of to advance
their fortunes, especially during and
since the war, as men have been found
willing and anxious TO sell soul and
conscience for little filthy lucre. A
few days since an incident occurred
which very forcibly illustrates this.
An Irishman was employed to dig up
and remove some Of the bodies Of
Union soldiers in the Wesleyan Gem
etery OF this city In lifting the cof-
fins he thought they seemed unusu.
ally hollow in their sound, and open
ing them found that no bodies had
ever been placed in them at all, moth
ing but planks or square blocks Of
wood. The mystery TO the honest
Hibernian was great, but when it was
told him that the Union soldiers were
buried by contract-the undertaken
receiving so much per coffin-and
that the bodies could be sold at a
handsome profit TO some medical col
lege, the doubt was at once removed,
and the avenue TO a large fortune i'm
mediately disclosed. This was only
one of the ways that the war made
men rich.
Year: 1868

lnere are people who are apprehensive that
some OF these days this globe may be smashed
10 atoms by wandering comet; and others
VINO think that the danger TO eur planet is in
ternal rather than external, and that some time
the gases generated by internal fires will pro-
onee greater earthquake than any recorded,
resulting in a breaking in of the crust, the
iushlng into the cavity of the waters of the
ocean, and the formation of steam at such
Tapld rate as to cause an explosion, which will
piow the inhabitants and their dwelling places
sky high, and plunge our organized world into
Its original chaos. As for the outside danger,
We have the assurance of scientific men that
comets are mainly composed of gas, and our
earth could pass through their attenu ated SUBJ
stance without damage: but even were they
made of mOrI solid matter, the tlmid NAV
take heart from a late occurrence in En-
rope. An aerolite, almost large enough to
rank in ponderosity as a comet, has recently
fallen on the earth's surface near Warsaw. in
Poland, without doing any damage but, on
the contrary, being itself shiyered TO piecas
by eoneussion with the atmosphere before it
reached the ground. u is said to have had
diameter OF more than mile. 1t first burst
nigh up in the air, then each of the pieces
broke up IN turn, until parts of the mass Were
reduced 10 powder. One scientific man picked





more remain strewed over the country This
seems to show that our atmosphere acts as
KIND OF cushion TO protect us against all such
dangerous visitors, and also sets them on fire
by friction, and the heat thus engendered ex-
plodes them into comparatively harmless bits.


The dangers which threaten us from inside
are not so remote, and the recent terrible earth.
quake in South America shows how unstable
Is the crust upon which we live. When the
ground, mans symbol Of all that is materially
solid and secure, rocks beneath his feet he can
not heip being impressed with the dread power
OF the unseen forces of nature, and with his
own lnslgnifcance. The great earthquake,
however, has its lessons well as its warning
and the account of its effects are interesting,
because they show something Of the asercies
by which the face of the earth must frequently
IN past times, have been altered, and afford re-
markable combinations Of the theory that the
great changes upon the globe have been the
result OF subterranean commotions. In Peru
the face Of the country has been changed. Hills
have been sunk down, lakes have been made
where there were high and dry lands; rivers
have drIed up in their courses, and new streams
run where there were none before The incl
dents OF this calamity show, on a small scale
what has been done on large scale before
mans occupation of the earth. In the Sand
wich Islands it has been noted that there has
been subsidence of a portion of the shore
varying from eight inches to seven feet.


Ihese facts are very suggestive, and are wor-
thy tee attention Of all who take an interest in
the physical history of the planet on which we
live
Year: 1868

PROPOSED CHANGE OF EPISCOPAL GOVERN.
MENT.-ln the New York Episcopal Conven.
hon, yesterday, there was spirited discussion
over the subject Of forming Federal Council
OF the Dioceses OF the State. A committee an.
pointed by the last convention TO prepare a
plan for federate council recommended a ca
non for adoption, declaring il lawful for the
dioceses now existing, or which may hereafter
be erected within the limits of any State or
Commonwealth, to establish for themselves q
federate council or convention, representing
such dioceses, which may deliberate and decide
upon the common interests OF the Church with
IN that State, and enact any laws necessary
thereto, not repugnant 10 or inconsistent with
the constitution and canons of the General
Convention and the Book Of Common PRAYER
This proposition is meeting with considerable
opposition. The Low Church delegates en-
deayored to introduce clause depriving the
council of legislative and judicial powers, but
II vote by orders their substitute was lost
90 against 15J.
Year: 1868

A friend of ours trod on rustv nail which penetrated his foot about one inch He used Renne's killing Maoic Oil thoroughly and cured it without trouble. This Magic Oil is what every family needs medicines. All who suffer from coughs, colds, irritation of the bronchial tubes or tendency to consumption, will find in Dr.

 Vistar's BaLsam of Wild Cherry, remedy as agreeable to the palate as effectual in re- moving disease. The Balsam is pleasant remedy; it is safe remedy; it is power full remedy; it is speedy remedy; it is a remedy that cures.
Year: 1868

A committee of the Protestant Episcopal Convention of South Carolina, to whom was assigned the duty of gathering inform. ation with regard to the destruction of churches and loss of church property dur from which we make the following extracts: The report of the Committee begins with fine southwestern part of the state, and fol- lows the line of Sherman's march, in its history of destruction. It appears that ten churches have been burned, and that three have disappeared; that. twenty-two parishes are suspended; and that two par sonages have been burned; that every church between the Savannah river and Charleston has been injured and that al most every minister in that region ol the State has lost his home and library.
Year: 1868

TO lie Planting CO1tnlunlty:


Our SUPER PHOSPHATE OF LIME and RAW BONE
PHOSPHATE having been tested for the Lass three
years on allakinds of crops, by the side of all
to the bcst and have given to all the general sat
isfaction that could desire, which we attribute
to our close attention to its keeping
it up to the standard at all times and knowing
hereafter further endeavor to improve it III every
way--Our rapidly increasing sales showing how
we'll its good effects appreciated by the Plant
ing community, and are satisfied that all who give
it fair trial will be we'll repaid aud pleased with
its quick action, lasting effects, and increased
yield of crop.
Year: 1868

This article is made of Pure Raw Bones and
Phosphate Guano, rendered to soluble form, and
contains the requisite quantity of ammonia to
stimulate the younS plants to get beyond the
reach of insects and also large amount of
Phosphoric Acid, to give strength and stability to
the stalk and weight to the grain.


It excelH Peruvian Guano i'll setting Glover,
makes heavier yield and superior quality OF Cot
ton, Tobacco, Grain, &c; and stands the drought
better, all Of which are very important to the
Planter.


For this valuable Fertilizer only ask fair
trial side by side with any Fertilizer in tho mar
ket. to attest it's superiority. It is active as
Peruvian Guano for the first crop, and TOR sue
ceeding crops far superior.


Every Planter should give it q trial, as the cost
is more than repaid the first year, and its benef-
cal effects lasting.


Fine and dry for drilling.