Year: 1861

they had become somewhat Indifferent,
bills came pouring in by the dozens,
and it was impossible to kill my duns as
l had my furniture, except by paying
them, a mode Of destroying these troub.
lesome vermin not always convenient
or agreeable. From the period Of
commencing housekeeping until now,
lhad never single occasion to put of
the payment Of bill. Iprided myself
on always paying ready mo ney for ev-
erything and it was an honest pride.
I can hardly express the modification
felt at being now occasionally under the
necessity Of giving excuses instead Of
money. had miserable invention at
this sort Of work Of imagination, and
sometimes, when more than usually
barren, I got into passion, AS people
often do when they don't know what
else to do. More than once found
myself suddenly turning a corner in
great hurry, or planting myself before
the window of a picture shop, studying
it very attentively, in order not to sec
certain persons, the very sight Of
whom is always painful to people of
nice sensibility.


Not being hardened to such like
triaes by long use, I felt rather sore
and irritable. Under the old regime
1t had always been pleasure to me to
hear ring at the door, because it was
the signal for an agreeable visitor; but
now it excited disagreeable apprehen.
sione, and sounded like tho knell of q
dun. Ishort, Igrew crusty and fdg-
ETY. by degrees, insomuch that Mrs.
Sowerby often exclaimed:


why. what has come over you, Mr.
Sobersides! Why, / declare, somehow
or other you don't seem the came per.
son you used to be- .....,-
/ could have answered, 'the new Mr..
Sobersides has killed the old Mr.. So
bersides.' But I said nothing, and
only wished her up in the garret,
among the old furniture.


My system of reform produced another
source of worrying. My old furniture and
myself had been 10 long acquainted, that |
could take all sorts IF liberty with it.
could recline on the,sofas of On evening or
sit one one of the old chairs, and cross my
legs on another, without the least ceremony.
But now, fsrsooth! it is as much as dare do
to sit down upon one of my now acquaintau.
ces and as for lounge on the sofa, which
was the Cleopatra for which l would have
lost the world, should as soon think Of t.
king nap in fine lady's sleeve-As to my
little rantipole boys, who had hitherto feared
carpet chair, or sofa, they have at length
been schooled into such awe Of 6nery, that
they walkod about the parlor on tiptoe, sit on
the edge Of chair with trepidatlon, and con-
template the sofas at o distance with the
most profound veneration, as unspproschabla
divinites- To cap the climax Of my system
Of reform, my easy old shoe friends, who
came to see me without ceremony, because
they felt comfortable and welcome, have
gradually become shy Of my new chairs and
sofas, and the last of them was the other eve
ming fairly looked out Of the house by oer.
tain person. for splitting accidentally upon y
brass fender, that shone like the sun at noon
day. ~ .a
might hope that in the course Of time
these evils might be mitigated by the furni-
ture growing old and sociable by degrees,
but there is little prospect of this, because it
is too fine for common use. The carpet il a.
ways protected by an old crumb-clsth, full ef
holes and stains; the sofa and chairs by din
gy cover-sluts, except on extraordinary occa-
sions, and fear they will last forever-at
least longer than shall. sometimes solacs
myself with the anticipation that my children
may live long enough to sit on the sofa with
impunity, and walk on tho carpet without
gong on tiptos.


There wsuld be seme consolation in the
midst of these sore evils ifI could only blame
my wife for all this. Many philosophers are
ofoplnion that this single privilege of matri-
mony is more than equivalent to all the rubs
and disapointnents oflife; and have heard
q very wise person affirm, that he would not
mind being ruined at all, if he could only
blame his wifi. for it. But must do usiae
justice to say. that she combated Mrs. Sower-
by gallantly, and throw every obstacle in
the way of my system Of REFORM advocating
the cause Of every nice piece ofold furniture
with zeal worthy Of better psuocess. I
alone am to blame in having yielded to the
temptation of that wicked woman, Mrs. Sowsr
| by; and as man who has ruined himself BY