Year: 1861

1
mamma, all to herself. She found in me
less affection. than she would have received
from governess or housekeeper. knew
all this. had never been deliberately cru
ell before. l was now. All Laura's CAV
vivacity was gone. She seemed all the time
fearful of displeasng me. She moved in a
low, quiet way that could see was painful
Tor her father to behold. do not know
how it was that his love for me was not ut
terly quenched, his patience all worn out
Perhaps he thought that l was not well,
and the sweet new conner, for whom he
hoped, would heal my nature OF its pride,
and pain and passion.


II


At last my day of trial dawned. There
fwere many hours Of terrible suffering. dur
ing which my husband hoyered over me al
most in despair, revealing the depth and
fnllness of his love as had never iivined
it before. lived, but the baby they had
laid upon my breast was dead. No faintest
thrill of life shivered those delicate limbs
no pulse futtered in the tiny wrist--no heart
beat stirred the little still breast. The del
icate. blue-veined eyelids would never lift
the lilly bud mouth never open. This lit
tile. cold. dead thing was ali. Where was
the soul Would they treat it tenderly in
the land of spirits-that soul so young, SO
tender, going out alone in the infinite Dark
Had q od measured out to me such measure
as l had measured, and to my cry for bread
given a stone?


My husband could not fully share my
feelings. He was disappointed it is true
but in his thankfulness for my spared life
he had little room for grief 1t was not his
first child-the loss could not be to him
what it was to me.


| had been i'll three days, when, one morn.
ing the nurse vert out for few moments
leaving the door open. / lay there with
closed eyes. my heart full of bitter, REBEL
ious grief heard little footsteps crossing
the room very softly. / knew Laurie hao
come in. did not move. wished her tc
think was asleep. felt that could moi
bear to speak to her then. She came tc
then she knelt down and murmured q little
prayer, which pierced me like a sword


oh, Father, up in heaven, please LEI
dear new mamma get better, and make he
love little Laurie


l believe, since that hour, that there NAV
be sudden conversions--single moment.
which change the whole tone and current o.
a life. Mine was changed then. l opened
my eyes, my arms, my heart.


"Come up here, little daughter whis
pered with such Tenderness as she had nevc
heard in my voice before.


She crept up beside me, and drew her I.
my bosom-a mothers loving bosom to he
forevermore, For few moments / wep
over her SILENTLY could not help it. TheI
l told her my sorrow.


:" Laurie" said, "God gave me it'll,
daughter, and in the same hour He gave it
He took it from me- Your mother and IN,
baby are both in Heaven will you be my
little girl on earth in the place of th'
dead 90


Her eyes frightened ; she cried eagerly
plaintively:


"Oh, love you, new mamma alway
did. Will you love me, too, and let me b.
your little girl %


Forever. my darling. whom God ha
given me-


When my husband came in. half an l,ou
aftsrward, he found me asleep, with Laurie
watching me.


"Now mamma loves me dearly" SIN
whispered joyfully, and her fathers tears
|
me.


There was never any jealousy in my hear
afterward. The fullness of Hiram Wood
bury's love satisfied every longing of my
heart, and Laurie was as dear to me as te
him. 1 sometimes think the institutions o
childhood are deeper than the lore of th'
philosophers. 1t was Laurie's childish fsitl
the heavenly babe as she always called my
little lost one. had been given in charge te
her own dead mother who was nursing i
tenderly as nursed the child below. 1t wa
a child's conceit; but it has dwelt pleasant,
in my heart.


Laurie is growing to her sweet woman
hood. l have never had another child.
go, alone, sometimes, to little grave
where the blue violets spread their canopy
and weep above it tears which long ago los
their bitterness. But if its tenant coul,
have lived to bless my arms and heart, ST.
could hardly have been dearer to me tia
the daughter of my adoption.-True E2a.