Year: 1859

YOUNG LADY.


10 make real fashionable young


lady, you should commence with


the Miss when about eight or ten


years old. If she can read with


tolerable ease in McGufy's First


Reader, she is then ready to receive


the first polish. Take her now to a


fashionable boarding school, give


her permission to buy as many dry


goods as the merchant will credit


you for, have her to attend dancing


school regularly, take music lessons


before she can write her name with


out mis- spelling it, encourage her


to cultivate a small waist "a small


waist 2! and very large skirts to
firt with every young man with


whom she becomes acquainted, and


beyond all let her learn to scream
and faint at proper int rvals, it is
So captivating! This course of
training will take about one year,
and then she is ready torsthe next.


As she has now learned to thumb
some tunes on the piano forte and
perhaps sighs she may cultivate
her musical (?) talent. She must
now attend all the balls, parties,
soiries, p'c-nics, ETC., and dances
till she will not be so silly as to blush
when a young man passes bis arm
around her waist during the waltz


Be very particular on this point,
for young lady who makes any
pretension to fashion must not blush
like a foolish country girl at any
thing Of the sort. But there are
times when she should exhibit great
modesty. For instance, when a
young gentleman Happens to say
leg, neck, breast, oreven foot, limbs,
etc, or when her very unpublished
mother happens to speak of ruftles,
shirts, ETC., before her in the pres
ence Of gentlemen. Attend very
closely t" these directions, for it is
very important to know when to
blush and wheh not.


A mistake would be highly wrong
in a fashionable young lady. In
her second course Of training, she
should study painting, get a smat-
tering of French, read poetry, and
lastly, graduate, though she may
not be able t0 parse the simplest
sentence in the. English language.
But what fashionable young lady
is expected to be reading the dry
pages of an English grammar, when
Dickens Or Thackeray's last novel
is still lying unread upon her desk?
During all this time Its of course
understood that she is carrying on
her tfirtations with the young men.


This brings us now to the third
part Of the work Of making a fash
ionable young lady. She must now
return home and commence seri-
ous]y the great work Of ]ife-get-
ting married. No young lady of
any pretensions to fashion would
marry until she has broken some
dozen OF hearts, and been engaged
half a dozen times. Of course she
is not to make herself ridiculous by
proving constant to one young man
a whole month. But she must be
taught not to discard one until she
has caught another. This is fatal
and has caused even some
fashionable youn ladies to Become
old maids. Teach her to swap off
each time for one Of more wealth
and tom, till at last she climbs as
she may without running the risk
II single blessedness. [ have known
Young ladies, by judicious swap
Ding, to commence with a young
nan in moderate circumstances,
ind swapt until they secured a man
# wealth. When she is quite sure
hat she can do no better, she may
hen get married, Which event gen
orally ends the brilliant career of
ash:nable young lady. ~


A lady friend of ours says the
irst time she was kissed, she felt
ike a big tub Of roses Swimming
NJ honey, cologne, nutmegs and't /
;ranberries. That she was escortsf
ID hv several canidsH in chariots