Year: 1868




(admitting that women were designed to
be more delicately organized y taking the
stand point from the best models, which
is the true criterion, all others being ex-
ceptional therefore there is propriety
in admitting that q aoonsan has q right to
choose u husband, ust as much SO as for
man to choose wife and che only
pretext for denying this is based upon the
inferior one Of sex only. In saying this,
[ have the whole innumerable. army Of
romance writer's and readers, as nell as
the dnsbecilc Of both sea;es, crying out
against NE ; nevertheless, I stand to the
point, and nail my color to the mast in
defence Of it-tkat 1t as right, proper and
delicate for q aooD1dap to choose her. has
band and the man thus distinguished
by her choice will feel himself ennobled
and sanctifed, and will award such wo-
man with ten-fold tenderness and rever-
ence.


[ am by no means willing to have it
understood that counsel women to 90
about popping the question" to men here
and there like an army OF grenadiers far
from it. A man rarely .'pops the ques-
ton" till be is pretty we'll assured in his
own mind as to the kind of response he
will receive and in all cases refined
woman prevents lover from explaining
himself where she is bent upon denial
of his suit. Literature is full of heroines
who are practicing after the fashion of
the renowned Spartan boy, and we follow
them throug.. innumerabe pages of vapid
sentiment, where they are living and ac-
ting myriardS of lies in order to uphold a
theory false in fact aud false to nature.


The two sexes are one In scientific
point Of view, and there is no merit in a
woman who lays her heart on the altar of
pride merely for the sake Of pride. 1t is
no worse for a woman to be rejected than
for man to be so if men and women
were high and true, they would each re-
gard the other 10 SO pure, SO holy light
that these goings forth of the heart would
be too sacred ever to be revealed they
would be too solemn for jest, too deeply
real for gossip, They would be laid
away, shrouded ike human hope, dead
but beautiful, in the lone chambers of the
soul, to be looked upon reyerently, just as
SO many of Us garner in some secret re-
ceptacle leaf, bud, lock of hair,
whose history is known OIL ly to as and
the angels.


Let our womeu be free lot only to re
ject, but to choose also. Men and women
are likely to do this without any great ex-
penditure oflanguage, for tie vocabulary
of love is more expressive than words


[ have known several women Of refine
ment and intellect, who owned that their
husbands were rather sought after by
them than otherwise, and these matches
were certainly among the happiest have
ever known. ..z


In choosing husband, it is easier to.say
what WON n should not choose than to
say what she should for the best must
and will depend on the characteristics
best known to herself Ifshe is strong
woman she may venture to marry a weak
man !; but if weak herself, let her beware
Of this, for she will put her own life out
at last, and ten to one do the same un-
gracious Office for her husband while a
woman Of nobler proportions will be
more forbearing, and make up, also, for
some of his deficiencies


Let not any woman marry man with
insane blood In his veins.


Let her not marry one deformed at
birth the disasters and accidental des-
truction of any member by war or other
wise, may excite her compassion and be
no impeachment to deep Affection but a
congenital defect becomes hereditary, and
by the laws of our being will be repug-
nant to wholesome minded woman.


She cannot and will not marry drunk
ard


She should not marry diseased, sick
ly man.


Neither will wise woman marry an
old man i, for the true idea of marriage is
the union of youth, and health, and beau
ty; thorough completeness of spiritual,
mental and physical life; and everything
short Of this is all but nauseous to a SYM
pathetic, penetratlve mind, as violation
of immutable laws


She will not marry a man younger
tilau ucint11j hoO oluipiJ loE CHe reason 50
often advanced, that woman grows old
sooner than a man, which is true only
because of the abuses Of society for a
woman of sound health and cheerful
mind, unswayed by the wicked passions
Of envy, jealousy and malice, carries in
her own breast fountain Of perpetual
health and beauty. Let her be temper
ate in all things; preserve her person
fresh as rose; her mind unwarped by
prejudice or idieness; her soul, with all
Its affections and impulses, pure and low
ing, and she may go oonward to her eighty,
ninety or hundred years, generally
beautiful to the last, fit for reverence aud
and admiration aud worthy to sit for one
of Michael Angeles SibyIs