Year: 1863

during the deacon's long "grace"-the passage
Of every mouthful-the manner in which
they asked every question and responded to
what was said to them-the amount Of food
and drink consumed-everything. They felt
themselves wrapped up in-devoured by-a
vigilant supervision that took from them their
liberty and their will, and with them, all
feelings of selfrespect and self-possession.


1t is not the opinion of your neighbors
that either your husband or yourself has had
anything to do with. the ruin of your children.
The deacon was so strict and so Efficient in
his family government, and you were so
scrupulously careful in everything that rela-
ted to their manners at home and away, that
they did not imagine it possible that any bad
result could naturally flow from such training.
l do not say that they are mistaken from any
wish to blame you, but l must tell you the
truth. Your minute watchfulness and censor
ship exercised over these children, until you
became to them God, conscience and will,
were just as fatal to manly and womanl y
development as the deacons irresponsible
commands. A boy that feels that every word
of his mouth and every movement of his body
is watched by one whose eye never sleeps,
and whose hand is every ready to repress,
becomes at last coward or bully. There
are natures that will not submit to this sur
veillance and when tbesel become weary of
the pressure, they kick it aside, and parental
restraint-associated with all that is hateful
in slavery-is gone forever.


Under the peculiar training and home in
Auences to which your children were sub
jected, there were but two til ings that they
were likely to become, viz: rebels or cravens
Your children were naturally high-spiri,ed,
like the deacon and yourself, and they be-
came rebels. Otherwise, they would have
carried with them through life the feeling
that whatever show they might put on
however much they might struggle against
it they were underlings. There are some
men and some women, probably, who, living
through long life, under favorable circum-
stances, recover from this early discipline of
repression, and this abject slavery of the
will, but they are few. They must be few
The negro who has once been a slave cannot,
one time in ten, refuse to take of his hat, or
bow to white man. He is never at home
| when placed on an equality with him. He
carries in his soul the badge of servlity, and
he can no more thrust it from his sight, or
Danish it from his consciousness, than he can
change the color of his skin. This is not
because he is negro, simply, but because
he has been slave,-because he has been
trained up to have no will and to be control
I'd under all circumstances by the wills of
those who had him in their power.


A child can be made the slave of parent
just as thoroughly as negro ever was made
the slave of white man, and such a child
can be just as everlastingly damaged by pa
rental or family slavery. as bondman can
be by any system of bondage. A child can
be made as mean, and cowardly, and deceit
full, and devoid of selfrespect, by system
of management which puts curb upon ev-
cry action as the devil himself could possibly
desire. This system of watchful repression,
and minute supervision, and criticism of ev-
cry action, among children, is utterly debili-
tating and demoralizing. You intended no
harm by it, madam Under the circumstan-
ces, it was very natural thing for you to
do; but think you Can hardly fail to see
that unwittingly, you perfec ted the work o!
destruction in your children which the dea.
con so thoroughly began, and for which he
would have been, without your assistance


entirely sufficient.


Oh! when will the world learn that child.
rem are neither animals nor slaves? When
will the world learn that children-the pur.
est, sweetest, noblest, truest, most sasacious
creatures in the world-with natural char


ter of liberty as broad as that enj ,yed by


the angels-shoul1 be treated with respect ?


When shall this idea that all legitimate train.


ing relates to the use of liberty-to the &C


QUESTION of the power of selfgovernment-
become the universal basis of family policy


You ask me what l really mean by all


this, for you are practical woman. and are
not to be taken in by a set of easily writer


phrases. Well, will try to explain, or il


lustrate, my meaning. l remember a gath.
, ering at your house-a party of friends tic
which your children were admitted, and


remember with painful distnctness the tele,
J graphic communication which you maintain.
} ed with them during the whole evening.
James got his legs crossed, or, in his drowsi
ness, gaped, or if he coughed, or sneezed, o.
laughed above certain key, or made a re
mark, or moved his chair, it was flames
) ~" James, h-m" :" "James, h-m
+ and James was only one of half dozel
! whom you treated in the same way. Yo,
!. began the evening with the feeling that 20,
, were entirely responsible for the behavior
r of those children,-just as much responsible
y as if they severally we're the fingers of YOU
0 hand. You acted as if they were machine
, which, for the evening, you had undertake
a to operate? They felt that they were unde
the eye of vigiant keeper, and they did nc
t dream of such thing as acting for them