Year: 1859

That depends on circumstances. I
you have good rifle. and know how
to usei it, you have chance in ten t.
live till you starve to death. But i
you can't stand fire, and are not gooG
shot ai@a quick one, take my word fol
it,you had better tarry in Jerico, unit
your beard be grown they are toe
sly for you in these woods.
Fifth question: Is land to be had
in the north part Of Ohio for 81 25
per acre, and it is good ?"


!" That's all fudge, got up by epecu-
lators to gull some greenhorn like you
or me, for to the best of my knowledge
and belief Ohio was worn out ten years
ago The who business of the railroads
in warm weather, is to carry folks who
have been fools enough to come West.
All the railroads have been doing this
winter is carrying dirt out of Ohio into
Michigan to raise few beans and oats
to keep the folks from starving to
death next summer.


AS to the land in the northwest of
Ohio, it is eighteen inches high under
water most of the year, and will pro.
badly be worth 81 25 per acre when
water snakes and copper heads bring
as much per barrel in the New York
maket as potatoes are worth per bush
Ell in Alton.


And lastly, he wants reliable infor-
mation-a short article in yonr paper
on the subject-and he wants to go
to healthy locasion, decent land and
fair water.


Exactly Why, my dear sir, there
is no such thing as reliable information
out West unless you give him 6ve'hun-
dred dollars and then you can't believe
half he says.


A witness won't tell the truth unless
you first scare him to death, and make
him swear he won't lie, and then Meth.
er himself nor anybody else knows
whether he tells the truth or not.


On the whole, if you feel obliged by
our "short article" SO no we. If you
want to go to healthy land, stay at
home, and don't be fool ike myself
come out West. And as for "decent
land " my dear fellow what do you
mean! You must know that our
prairies are very indecennt, especially
where it is burnt over and left as naked
as it was born. Tis true, nature
weaves rort of fig-leaf apron every
summer, out of a coarse kind of grass
but it soon gets burned of, and is as
indecent ms ever.


As for fair water, we have none; it
is all a bilious compound of liquid mud,
dead buffaloes. fish and rottan rattla.s
snakes.


Our common drink, when we can't
get whisky. is one third coffee, one
third prairie mud, and the other tobac-
co juice.


Upon the whole, if you have good
water, and get half enough to eat,
stay where you are.


WHAT WE CALL DUTIES. Every man
ought to pay his debts-if he can.


Every man ought to help his neigh
bor---if he can.


Everg man and woman ought to get
married--if theycan.


Every representatives. Congress and
the State Legislature ought to inform
their constituents what they are doing
if they can.


Every man should be honest and
sober if he can.


Every man should do his work TO
suit his custofners--if he can.


Every man should pldase his wiEe--
he ca n.


Every wife should rule her husband
If she can.


Every woman should sometimes bold
her tongae--if she can.


Every lawyer shold tell the truth
if he can.


Every preacher of the Gospel should
be a ohristian-if hecan.


Every person may be a fsol-if he
can.


Evarv woman sho,,ss o,;, ..;,,,.