smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1869

%. Every sach board shall appoint
ose of their members president, and
shall also appoint clerk to continue in
office during their pleasure. A majority
of the board shall constitute quorum
for the transaction of business. In case
of the absence of tho president, or clerk,
the board may appoint president or
clerk pro tenn
Year: 1869

EFFECTS OF DIssIPATIoN.-It is
r'ported that the cause of Victor
Emmauuels late dangerous illness
was excessive dissipation, and that
he is reduced to a condition which
does not admit of cure. IL is also
asserted that Bismarck is in a state
Of intellectual prostration and decay
from. similar cause and that Prince
Humbert of IIaly, the heir apparent
10 'he throne, is faithful imitator of
lis sire in this respect.
Year: 1869

A PRoDIGAE returned to the house
of his brother and sister in Pontisc,
Michigan, the other day, and was re
ceived with open arms, ate the fat
ted calf, aud all that sort of thing,
and two days thereafter built nice
fire, with kerOsine oil, under the
bedchamber, in oIer to burn them
to death aud secure the property.
Year: 1869

How NATURAL.-'I don't miss
my church as much as you suppose.
said lady to her minister, who col-
led upon her during her illness, for
l. make Betsy sit at the window as
soon as the bells begin to chime, and
she tells me VINO are going TO church,
and whether they have got on any.
thing new
Year: 1869

A larue number of eminent divines
from all sections of the State, were here
in attendance upon the North Eastern
Indiana Conference, which was held its
sessions in this city. The deliberations
of the assembly were presided over by
Bishop SIMPSON, one of the most able
and eloquent Methodist dignitaries in
the world. We have seldom seen q
more gentlemanly, amiable, or intelli-
gent looking body of men, congregated
together. May each one of them be
abundantly successful in their high and
noble calling. We shall endeavor to
publish the proceedings of the Confer
ence in our next issue.
Year: 1869

Within the last two weeks three men
have lost their lives on the railroad
The last one killed was brakeman; he
fell asleep and rolled off of the car, the
train passing over his body. 1t being q
very dark night, the engineer Of the
next train did not see the body, and his
train passed over the mangled form
The next train picked him up, the engi-
neer discovering the body ere the cars
reached it, The other two were engi-
neers, one being killed in collision,
occurring near Indiahapolis: the other
lost his life by some one piling ties upon
the track, throwing the engine over and
crushing him beneath its ponderous
weight.
Year: 1869

OFFICE HoLDING.-There must be an
ecstatic charm about holding Office, that
is irresistible to some men, and who
would be like a fish out of water, if they
hadn't public teat in their mouths, or
the string in their lips prepared to un-
dergo the process of puckering at the
prospect just ahead of them to imbibe
the lacteal fluid! That was the drift of
our thoughts, that formed into words at
the end of our pen. when our attention
was called to the fact that our friend
Thomas McGirr, wanted to be Marshal
Of the city Of Richmond! We do not
wish to be understood as objecting to
Thomas, for his aspirations to the offices
of Chief. Of Police, and Marshal-he has
perfect right to be a candidate for any
office, and all offices at the same time!
That is certainly broad enough admis-
sion, to relieve US from the charge of
trying to circumscribe his usefulness in
an official capacity. Our friend Thomas
already occupies two positions in Wayne
Township-he is Constable and mem
Der Of the City Council both Offices Of
trust and profit, and, he owes it to the
fact that certain Major Kinley is not
a member of the latter body, that
the constitutional question of his eligi-
bility to hold two or more offices ut one
and the same time, has not been agita-
ted! Fact; and it does not become an
| %o ho fon <lo
he does hold taco positions, only so far
as it may enable him to commend the
office holder for further honors. This
brings us to the consideration of
Thomas's reaching for the Marshalship.
That he is eminently competent to fill


that 'posish' is already shown from his
versatility OF talent as Councilman and
Constable-combining,. in an eminent
degree. both ministerial and legislative
ability! We are surprised that Mr.. Zim-
norman and the Treasurer and Clerk do
not give up the contest with one who
can run the whole machinery of the City
Government to his own entire satisfac-
ton, honor and glory!


If there is any other Office in the gift
Of our citizens that Thomas desires to


I'LL, that We have neglected to mention,
We hope he'll let us know. before the
election, in order that his claims may be
properly advocated in our columns. In
conclusion, as it takes three chairs com


monty, to accommodate a Constable


Councilman and Marshal, we call for that
number for Thomas McGirr .Hip!--hip!
bur-
Year: 1869

There are only about THREs-FIFTHs of the ca.
ses of chronic disease that admit OF POSITIVE
AND RADICAL CURE. One-half of the incurables
can be- under favorable circumstances, much
benefited. and the other half only palliated.-
am willing to treat any case and do what
can for it, but it SO happens that very largt
number of those patients whose complaints can
not be wholly eradcated do not wish to under~
60 treatment. Now as my time at each point
visit is all needed in examining and treating the
CuRABLE cases it would be q waste of time for
me to bestow my attention upon those whom l
cannot cure.


To avoid this, and save the patient all unne-'
cessary trouble and expense, al. are required to
write to me and await my answer before calling
on me at any of the places | visit. Each pern
son 50 doing must answer the following ques.
tons: What is your height, weight and age?-
How long have you been sick? Are you OF
temperate habits? What do physicians call
your disease? Are your bowels usually costivo
or otherwise? Is your complaint hereditary
| that is have any other members of your family
so far back as you can trace beeh afflicted in
the same manner you? Has ernaciation Coss
Of hesh) been gradually going since you be.
caae aware of your present complaint? What
is the condition Of your mindf Are your
thoughts and emotions generally Of dreary
nature or the contrary? Have you pains of apy





degree of intensity as nearly as you can and
the length OF time you have had them.
A plain answer to the foregoing questions
will enable me to determine at once whether
the case is durable one. qala
All letters may be addressed to CLEvk
LAND, o.. as have an agent there who will
forward letters regularly by express, wherever
/ may be, so that they will never be delayed
beyond day or two on any occasion. aT
AS soon as q letter comes to hand, I will
take the case into consideration, and in my re.
ply give my opinion of it and the name Of tho
Hotel at which I may be found in the city near.
| est you which visit.


-AH correspondents must enclose post
paid envelope addressed to themselves.
Direct all letters as follows v-a


DR.. A. M. FRENCH,


8 Care Lock Box 20, Cleveland, Ohio
Year: 1869

~WAR-D.-Just now we have q small
chunk of war on Wards, and good
deal Of feeling is arising in consequence.
The momentous question was put to the
Mayor as to ,Ohere that first petition was,
| or in whose possession it had been con


fided--whether the special committee or
Clerk had tor whether the Chairman
Of that Committee had deposited it in
his breeches pocket for safe keeping.


The Mayor took time to consider this
important query. and then decided,
solemnly and deliberately, that the Com


mittec was responsible for the document.


Thereupon, Mr.. Elder, the Chairman OF


said committee, moved that further time
be given to the committee to report
this motion was carried, and the Chair


man resumed the labor Of wet nurse to


that unfortuanate Wa,d. From the pro
ceedings of the Republican meeting on


Tuesday night last, published in another
column, the people intend to permit the


committee to keep the petition, whilst


they proceed to vote on both PROPOSE
tions for q division, and vote the Vine
street proposition dopn, and the 7th
street proposition up. This is right If
the Council neglect, or refuse to take
the requisite steps to get an expression
on the matter, then the People them
selves can INSTRUCT their representatives
as to their wishes by and through the
ballot box. az
Year: 1869

We learn that one of the, drivers of
the American Express, in jumping out
Of his wagon on the track, at the Depot,
came in contact with hand-car just
coming along--it struck him in the back
of the neck. Strange to say. the car
was thrown off the track by the concus-
sion but the driver escaped with some
severe but tho dangerous bruises.
Year: 1869

Our sanctum was favored with visit
from the first fly of the season, on last
Friday. He presented very healthy
appearance, which indicates that he will
be able to carry on the "summer cam
paign" with vigor. The remainder of
his household will be along in few
DAYS
Year: 1869

The Dogs.-The proclamation of the
Mayor, in reference to the determination
of unmuzzled CANNES, is 50 understood
by the police that they have, up to this
date, failed to put it in execution. There
is a screw loose somewhere.
Year: 1869

The editor of the Columbus Inder is
ont in search of new wrinkles, and has
found one on board the Louise while
making the trip to New Orleans. Let
him tell it himself, which he does in this
wise:


told you three years ago about
meeting a theological student who dealt
me four queens in o eHcre hand, aud
saw me out of ten dollars with four
aces. had the pleasure of meeting his
younger brother this trip-I know he 10
O younger brother for he is dressed Just
like him and has the same pious look.
He came to me with an orange this even
ing and begged me to eat IL. at first
declined, but he looked 80 hurt that
took it--and be thanked me SO real kind
that felt proud of myself. There
was plain old farmer standing
near, and my pious friend offered him
another orange, wb Ich was refused, when
the young man looked again so hurt that
the old man took it, butran his fingers in
his vest pocket and fished out bright
new nickel, which he handed to the char
liable dispenser of tropical fruit. The
young man at fret drew back Indignantly,
muttsring that his orange wa present;
the old coon replied his nickel was also
a present, and the other, blu.shing as only
a modest young man could, took IL and
beat hasty retreat-and l reared with
laughter. ~


When he had gone, asked the old
gentleman, ia that fellow fool or a
knave p His reply was model of
Yankee prudence. II don't know, but /
never allow myself to be placed under an
obligation to stranger" Shrewd
Yankee and master of himself TO the last
he escaped the sen'se of obligation by
giving the man five cents for dime or
ange. was humblsd before his wisdom
Il am looking for that orange man
every moment to apply to me to loan him
five dollars on the strength Of his burned
Hesperidan fruit.
Year: 1869

Lord P4lmerston is reported to have
given the following advice: IF the man
who was married once, and had the good
fer une to bury his wife, is fool enough to
marry again, by all means let him marry
bis deceased wife's sister. as then, at any
rate, be will only be afflicted with one
msther-in-law."
Year: 1869

Mark Twain made speech at banquet in
his honor in Pittsburg, recently, in which he
thus described his debut in the lecture field:
had been told not to undertake to lecture
by almost every one talked with on the sub
ect. Some of my most intimate friends said
to me that / would make bigger fool of my
self than 1 really was. Take and sell the arti-
Gle you have written; it is good enough for a
magazine, but you can't read it acceptably be.
fore an audience. However, was bent on
delivering lecture, and 1 finally found encour-
agement in an old newspaper man of San Fran
cisco. He advised me to 60 in and secure
large house for my initial effort, but told him
that thought it would be advisable to start a
small house. Mcguire, who owns the Opera
House in San Francisco, rented me his build
ing for $50, and [ secured an old circus man to
attend to the heavy business. The town was
well placarded, but on the morning previous
to the lecture l cursed myself for announcing
reserved seats. However, went down to the
theatre about four o'clock in the afternoon,
and there l found my friend in the box-office,
where had placed him. Every seat in the
house had been sold, and upon making this dis
covery half resolved to leave town, but my
friend wouldn't let me. The house was opened
at seven o'clock, and the lecture was annOun-
ceu 10 cOllnneIlce dG tlSHt 1HiI L ulISlb dc-
custom myself to the place l went down about
six o'clock, but was in terrible sweat, and
such torture as ] was possessed of never
want to experience again. | slid in softly SO
that no one could see me, and went cropping
and shiverng among Odd-looklng castles, forts
and other stage things, until found the cur
tain, and by peeping through hole in it saw
| that the house was crammed full of people.
At this discovery my alarm increased and if |
had felt bad before now was worse. Drops
OF sweat fell when thought that if | should
90 out there and make bOtch, there were
men enough to eat me up. However, had
taken the precaution to get six good men, and
procure them seats in the first row. When
said anything that resembled a joke, they were
to go it no the floor as hard as they could. If
the Jokes were very obscure and the audience
wouldn't see it, was to look at my six men in
the front row, and smile, as the signal for an
uproar, which upon every occasion was
promptly answered. went on at last in such
a sweat that | was obliged to lean on a bench
for support, but in few minutes my fellows
made such outrageous applause that half re-
covered, and was actually surprised myself at
the number of jokes related. l went on swim
mlngly, interspersed my jokes with pathos and
when in this strain | happened to catch the eye
of lady in a box l was acquainted with, and
| accordingly smiled gently. Instantly it was
caught up and responded to by the six men in
the front row and upon this occasion they did
their best.
Year: 1869

observation-disclosures Kane, the switch
tender on the Western Pacific Railroad, who
was arrested on the charge of manslaughter,
in being the party responsible for the terrible
accident on that road, has had his examination
and been discharged from custody as innocent
of the charge.
Year: 1869

The management of the Erie Railway is
| about to illuminate the whole of that road
by plan more novel than any ever before
dreamed of, even by the widest visionary.
From this city to Buffalo and Dunkirk, it is
designed to make the line one unbroken line
of light by the application Of the electric
light to each locomotive. and stationary
lights at the ferries, in the Bergen tunnel
and at all the dangerous curves along the
route. The arrangements for manufacturing
the electric lamps are already completed by
MIR. f. Z. Morse who has the matter in
charge. Mr.. Morse claims several discover
les and Improvements in connection with the
electric light, among which may be men
toned self-sustaining battery, device for
making the carbon points, used to give the
electric point. and an ingenious arrange
ment by which the electricity to run the
lamps will be collected from the friction of
the wheels as the train is in motion. Two
lamps will he used for lighting Bergen tun-
mel, with one in the middle, as the tunnel is
not straight, but curves. Other lamps will
then be stationed at each end of the Pavonia
ferry, which will throw broad belt of light
across the North river every night. to guide
the traveller safely to his home in the metrop-
oils These lights will, it is said, be so in
tense that on the darkest foggy night there
will be no danger of collision on the water,
any more than in the day time. Still more,
1t is proposed to fill Twenty-third street
every night with flood of white light from
the North river to the Fifth Avenue Hotel,
SO that travellers at the heart of the metropo-
lis may at all times be reminded of the
broad and happy way.-Neao York Tribune.
Year: 1869

Mr.. EcIToR The broom used by your
short. hand reporter, to sweep off the chaotic
mass of confusion, intended by those great
and worthy orators of that Pitt county in
dignaton meeting, was just exactly the
| right length 1t swept them all OH SO
Glenn, that when they met again, they met
in little squads, with their sticks up, con-
sulting how to make better strike.


The conclusion was to single out their
best champions to beseech the Raleigh Sen
tinel and Tarboro .Southerner to reply imme-
diately and try to redeem them and save
them little while longer if possible. If
those papers can change the leopard's spots
they can wipe out the black deeds OF those
restless orators. II they are redeemed by
their organs it will only. be momcntarily,
for the purpose of giving them little
longer to repent. Their time is nearly
spent, they are close to the ferry and will
soon cross over where they will expect re-
ward, but alas their work there, as here, is
fluitless Their sins must be met, their
deeds are black.


They have tried to run their same old rule
or ruin spirit over the men who favored the
United States government, over the bcnevo-
lent spirit of reconstruction, and the spirit
CT equal rights before the law; but they re-
port failure, they will soon get ashamed
OF themselves, pay their taxes and we
hope decline any further attempt in
the future to raise another indignation
meeting. They say they are all loyal now,
but they ought to have brought up the
proof sooner. We are all loyal now after
we couldn't help it. That is not the ISSUE
We want men who can best work or best
agree. We don't want men who will tear
up Il whole net because there are two or
three fish in it that are unciean. Why not
save the net and the good fish. Saw the
thorns off the catfish and let them swim to
the compass without so much danger of stab
ing all the rest to death.


They fell overheard, got wet all over and
when their heads popped up above the
water they grabbed hold of the little secesh
boat again instead of having embarked in
the good old ship of State which is able to
keep us all dry. 1t is loaded with states
men who were charitable and benevolent
when we were NAL


How great is the true spirit of Christian
ity, and then how small the poor, degraded
crazy war spirit preachers who make the
prctence that secession was right, and dis
Ike christians because they were in favor
Of the United States government. How
long, Oh! how long will the devil stay away
rom home, and continue to trouble US.
We are Union men, peace men, and desire
% put honest men in office We do not
tesire to follow after dishonest politicians.
It would he against our interest to do so.


* x i


Greenville. July 81, 1869.
Year: 1869

Ii is authenticity stated that one fifth of the
inhabitants ofthis country and Europe die of Con-
sumption. No disease has been more thoroughly
studied, and its nature less understood; there is
no disease upon which exists greater diversity
OF opinion and no disease which has more com
pletely baffled all medical skill and remedial
agencies.


Some of the prominent symptoms are Cough,
Expectoration, Shortness OF Breath Irritation
about the Lungs and Chest, darting, Pains in the
Sides and Back, Emaciation, and general negative
condition of the whole system.


Persons suffering with this dread disease, or
any of its concomtants, should lose no time in
possessing themselves of the proper Remedy, in
order that they may stay its ravages, and be re
stored to health. The
Year: 1869

ADvICE.-YOung man don't get
too "foxyr' X you happen to get
in possession of a few dollars, act
just as you did before you got them.
Don't swell up and burst. If you
have good share of brains you
won't do this; you will remember
that neither money, clOtlIes or good
looks make the man, and that worth
is as often garbed in ragged coat
as it is in brOadcloth. Don't stand
on hotel steps, dangling your watch
chain and talk "hoss;" better buy q
book ndlearn to read without spell.
inc YOUR words. Those who load
themselves with airs are the email
est kind OfpOtatoes and the fewest
in the hill. A fat job often spoils
young men of weak minds. They
Immediately commence to rag out
and take great pride in cultivating
an aldermanic corporation, and q
sporting air. Sensible persons are
always disgusted with such actions
when they deign to notice them,
which is very seldom. Reflect, and
turn over a new leaf.
Year: 1869

n MONARCH OF THE FOREsT.-
The Woodstock Standard says that
an elm was recently cut on the cid
Fuller farm in Royalton, which was
one hsrrlred and twenty feet in
height, The trunk was perfectly
straight and sound, and measured
sever feet in diameter two feet from
the ground, and three feet in diame-
ter at sixty feet from the ground, at
which point the first branches start
ed out. The treo furnished over
thirty -six cords running measure OF
sixteen inch wool, and employed
one man nearly fifteen days to fell
and work it up. An attempt to
count the rings made its age to be
from two hundred and fifty to three
hundred years.
Year: 1869

the yard, he found the bandage
had come off his arm during the
night, and that the blood was flow
ing afresh. Being alarmed he rose
to go to the barber, who lived across
the street, but press gang laid hold
of him just as he lett the public
house. They hurried him to the
pier where their boat was waiting
a few minutes brought them on
board frigate, then under way for
the East Indies. and he omitted ev-
er writing home to account for his
sudden disappearance. Thua were
the chief circumstances explained by
the two friends thus strangely met.
The silver coin being found in the
possession of the young man, could
only be explained by the conjecture
that when the boatswain gave him
the knife in the dark, it is probable
that as the coin was in the same


pocket it stuck between the blades
of the knife, and in this manner be
came the strongest proof against
him.
Year: 1869

The Utica On. W Herald says
the prospect for farmers-especially
dairymen---in that section, has not
for years been more promising
Flour, woolcn and cotton goods,
most articles the farmers have to
buy, are cheaper than they have
been before since the war; while
beef cattle, butter and cheese com
mand high prices and find ready
sale. The market is so thoroughly
cleared of cheese, on both sides OF
the water, that even Il more than
average production will not be likely
to put the prices below the highest
figure sold at during last season
while the increased number who
will turn their milk into cheese, Will
keep the supply of fbutter SO reduced
that remunerative prices are likely
to be obtained by the butter makers
The season, too, opens auspiclouslA
for the manufacture of both buttel
and cheese, as the winter has beer
such as to leave the ground in al
excellent state for the grass crop
Although the demand for cheese
making apparatus exceeds that ol
last year, there appcarsto be strong
disposition throughout the dairy re
gion of New York to return to prl-
vate dairying, instead of sending
milk to the cheese factories.


The general condition ofthlngs II
New England is pretty much tn
same as in New York, and our iaI
mcrs can look forward to season
of continued prosperity.