Year: 1869




A Mothers Advice to her Daughter.


BY MRS. GENERAL BANKS.


Every considerate woman who is
interested in the education of children,
or the elevation of her sex, feels that
there are elements of character more
essential to happiness and more at
tractive in life than the mental culture
which schools are expected to furnish.
! These are impressed upon youthful
minds by the force of example and by
the faculty of observation. They are
the foundations upon which that
which is useful or beautiful in life
must be planted. One of the traits of
character which is most essential and
attractive is the capacity to adapt our
selves TO the condition of things in
which we are placed. To do this sue
cessfully, a child must be taught to
accept events as they come. 1t is not
necessary or just that young lady
should be required to rest content in
every situation in which she is placed.
Improvement, as rule, is easier and
better than change. But habitual dis
content is generally fatal to happiness
and improvement. The power to
adapt ourselves to the actual condition
of things, however unsatisfactory they
may be, is essential to either. To
make the best of every thing is wise
counsel, on the part of parent or friend.
Bear patiently whatever may seem
unpleasant or unkind. Be quiet, and
when an opportunity occurs to i'm
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wise to keep your joys and griefs main
ly to yourself No one but parent
can truly feel for you. We think 9TH
erwise, but experience shows that 1t Is
impossible. We should sympathize
with sorrow, and do all we can for its
relief. This is the first of our duties
and the sweetest of our pleasures.


Let it be our aim each day so to live
as to avoid that which is unpleasant
or offensive to Others, and thus escape
thesorrow of repentance. There is no
satisfaction in constantly doing that
which is wrong and constantly re-
penting. No lady can be true to 9TH
ers who is not true to herself. 1t is
better not to initiate, but still no one
ought to be wholly unconscious Of
others. 1t is by coming in contact
with people that we improve; We
must see life as it really is. We can
not concur in the opinion that young
children ought to see only that which
is pure and good. They must meet
the world as it is, and meet it when
young. They must have the oppor-
tunity to compare. Comparison is
great power in the formation of char
acter. A young lady that has seen
nothing of real life, and only knows
what she has heard and read, is great
ly astonished when she meets the dis
tinguished men and women of any
country. They are not equal to her
standard. Young people may be made
better by contact with that which is
not so good. Instead of falling them
selves, they should try to make the
bad good. To be thrown in early life
among all classes and conditions of
people ought to be esteemed an advan-
tage rather than a misfortune. The
people from whom we can obtain the
most sensible, the truest and wisest
views of life, are found among those
who struggle for existence. No one
can truly understand life unless they
have suffered. OF this we may be GER
tain. A truly wise mother might
Justly be distressed if her child never
knew grief. There are plenty of peo-
pie who think they have trouble but
to feel what trouble is, we must be as
others are.


To be really good, one must have
seen life in all its phases. A poor lit
tie barefoOted girl looks upon the ele-
gantly dressed lady and thinks her
happy. She has food and clothing,
and of course plenty of friends. She
knows what comfort, what joy is. But
she could better understand and would
better comprehend what happiness or
what virtue is if she knew with how
little envy, indeed with what pleasure,
her ill-clad and suffering observer
gazes upon what we receive as eviden-
ces of her happiness. The griefs are
fancied. The others are real. But
often the real happiness is where the
poverty is and the wealth is not. We
are sometimes surprised that poor
people behave so well. How many
wrongs they might commit, which
are never done! A poor mother goes
out to beg bread for her darling, per-
haps her dying child. She is the suf-





and luxury, but she dares not inter
fere. 1t is her sense of justice, the
justice of her people, that protects her.
She has sufferings, but she has also a
protection that wealth does not give.
God is wise. He deals justly. 1t is
not well for US to see and to know for
ourselves such sufferings and such
virtue, that we may fully compre-
hend His goodness and His wisdom.


1t is best that children should not
be too strongly governed. 1t is the
same in families as with nations. Too
much government defeats the object
we wish to accomplish. 1t is the duty
Of parents to be what they desire their
children to be. A mothers example
should be her daughters constant
guide. 1t is unwise to observe TOO
closely slight faults. How few there
are that can bear rigid cross-examina-
ton! There is nothing a mother
should so much eovet and so much
prize as the unreserved confidence of
her daughter. But to gain and retain
this confidence, we must live the life
we profess. Nothing does a child
more harm, nothing can impart to a
mother greater grief, than the loss of
this touching and tender relation
which brings the daughter to the
mother in confession of her error, or
which would prevent her return, even
upon repetition of her fault, with
the same hope of counsel and forgive
ness which encouraged her first appeal
A child should never be made to suffer
theagony of a mothers final condem-
nation. Reconciliation should never
be impossible.


A young lady should accustom her.
self to feel for others, to have kind
word for all. We can never know
what good a kind look or word NAV