smithclay/nortonstories huggingface dataset:
Year: 1868

The following instructions, although vel. un-
derstood and practiced by amateur correspond
ents of newspapers, may prove useful to young
beginners:


When addressing the dear public through the
columns of newspaper the first time 1t IS ad-
visable to state that the paper has the largest
circulation of any in the United States, and that
if the citizens of the writer's locality were de-
prived of its use for single hour, revolution
would be Immediately set on foot. Besides,
whether the statement be true or not the editor
and the public will believe it.


Communications should be written on both
sides of sheet, and overrunning matter should
he written across the lines with pencil of the
same color. Correspondents whose communica-
tions have been rejected when written on one
side only, may now learn the necessity of ad-
herring to this rule.


1t is immateral what kind of paper is used,
though tissue is used when writing for daily
paper. Whether using pen or pencil, the writer
should invariably grease the paper well, SO that
the compositor may with the least difficulty
make out the writing.


When writing on Il subject that is not inter
estng to any one but the author, at least every
other word should be Italicized. This should be
done to develop the humor of the compositions
class of men usually grave and indisposed to
swear.


When correspondent is disposed to be jolly,
and wants to ''crack a joke" the sentence con-
tanning the joke should be put in italic capitals,
preceded and followed by three exclamation
points otherwise it might pass unnoticed, and
the world would remain in unhappy ignorance
Of the talents of the writer.


Is and is, when standing alone as initials,
should be made precisely alike When long lists
of names occur, shonld be written like e, and
neither should be dotted. The should be made
like t. and crossed and should be made as
alike possible, and ought closely to re-
semhle them. All middle names should be writ
ten in full and opunctuation marks used When
middle names are not spelled out, the initials
should be run into each other as nearly pos
sible. True, this may not accord with the Spen-
cerian method, but fashion is superior to rule.


\ strict compliance with the above rules not
only secures accuracy in print, but promotes a
spirit of pety among printers and p:oot-readers.
Year: 1868

PRoFANIrY.--Why will men, but more partic-
ularly Odd Fellows and Masons, take the name
of God in vain What possible advantage is
gained by it? and yet how many of the Frater
nifty who have proclaimed their trust in God,
knelt before the Great Light, and followed to
its close, as participants, our magnificent ritual,
are daily guilty of this sin against the Eternal
One, an offense to decency. On this point the
North american Repiew well says :-'' There are
among us not few who feel that simple as
sertion or plain statement of obvious facts will
pass for nothing unless they swear to its truth
by all the names of the Deity, and blister their
lips with every variety of hot and suphurous
oaths. If we observe such persons closely, we
shall generally find that the ferccness of their
profanity is in inverse ratio to the affiuence of
their ideas. We venture to affirm that the pro-
fanest men within the circle of your knowledge
are afflicted with chronic weakness of the intellect.
The utterance of an oath though it may prevent
vacuum in sound, is no indication of sense.
1t requires genius to swear. The reckless
taking of sacred names in vain is as little char
acteristic of true independence of thought it
is of high moral culture. In this breathing and
beautiful world, filed as it were, with the pres
ence of the Deity, and fragrant with its incense
from a thousand altars of praise, it would be no
servility, should we catch the spirit of reverent
worshipers, and illustrate in ourselves the senti-
ment that the Christian is the highest man.


VILLAINoUs PoETRY.-The Ku Klux Klan gen.
temen use some very high-fown language and
seek to invest their order with what Senator
Lewis, of Tehama, in his reconstruction speech
called sympathetic paraphernalia." Here is a
sample:


"The ghosts of our martyred dead fit nc
more uneasly on the Stygian shore, crying fol
vengeance but rest in bliss in the Elysium O
the Brave. Once more unto the breach deal
friend Once more


"By the dagger and the bowl;


BY the frelock and the brand


BY the patriotic soul,


Save Race and Land.


"Attend the Cabaa, and the curse Of Nemesi;
upon him who speeds not the foot at its mystic
summons"
Year: 1868

INITIATING A CANDIDATE INTO THE Coon TEN
pLARs.-.The method of initiating a candidate
into a Lodge of Good Templars is but slight
improvement upon the same programme so long
in vogue by the ancient and honorable fraternity
of the Sons of Malta. A ''chap" was taken
from a lager beer saloon, where he got " tight
without knowing that lager would intoxicate,
was put through cod-water treatment by the
Good Templars, few evenings since. lie
''preaches" on the Templars, and gives the fol-
lowing exposure of their initiation ceremony,
for which, no doubt, he will be put through
other course of cold water 'tsprouts" at the
next meeting of the Lodge:


In the first place, the victim for initiation is
blindfolded, bound hand and fool, and thrown
into q cider-press and pressed for five minutes.
This is done tor the purpose of clearing his system
of ssold drinks" lie is then taken out of the
cdcr-press and by means of force-pump,
gorged with cistern water, after which a sealing
plaster is placed over his mouth, and he is rolled
in a barrel four five times across the room,
the choir at the time singing the cold water
song. he is taken out of the barrel and
hung up by the heels till the water runs through
his ears. He is then cut down and beautiful
young lady hands him glass of cstern water.
\ cold water bath is then furnished him, after
which he is showered with cistern water. He is
then made to read the Water Works Acts ten
times, drinking glass Of cistcrn water between
each reading. After which the old oaken bucket
is hung around his neck, and fifteen sisters, with
squrt-guns, deluge him with cistern water. He
is then forced to eat peck of snow, while the
brothers stick his ears full of iccles. He is
then through cothes-ringer, after which
he is handed glass of cstern water by young
lady. He is again gorged with cistern water,
and his boots filled with the same, and he is
laid away il refrigerator. The initiation is
now almost concluded. After remaining in the
refrigerator for the space of half an hour, he is
again taken out and given glass of cistern wa
ter, run through clothes-ringer, and becomes
a Good Templar.
Year: 1868

The RETURN OF GENERAL MCCLELLAN =
a short time ago joint committee of the
Common Council of the city of New York
was appointed to tender GENERAL George B.
Mcclellan public reception upon his arrival
In the city from Europe. In connection
with this subject, a letter was read in the
Board OF Councilmen, May 22d, which was
sent BY General Mcclellan to General Dur,
yea, acknowledging, the compliment rendered
him by the corporate authorities, and ex-
pressing the qualification it afforded him to
be thus assured that long absence from the
city had not changed the kind feelings with
which he had long been honored by the city
authorities of New York, and concluding a
request that as he General Mcclellan de.
sired to return to the city With the utmost
quletness, and to avoid everything in the
form OF public demonstration on the part
OF his friends, that no snch demonstration
would be made. The Board of Councilmen
accordingly adopted resolution that as Gen.
eral Mcclellan desired to avoid any public
display upon his arrival, thar an engrossed
letter be prepared and presented to the Gen.
eral expressive of the sentiments of tho high
esteem and appreciation entertained for him
by the representatives of the city of New
York, for the inYalnahlA sA-ria4s- -eslered
his native land in her darkest hours of
trouble.-NeU York Post.
Year: 1868

INCOME TAx.-An eminent member of
the New York bar, has lately published in
the daily press of that city, very searching
and able examination of the Income Tax, in
which the ground is taken that the tax is
expressly forbidden by that clause of the
Federal Constitution which says that aNo
eaP'ta'lon or other direct tax shall be laid


unless IN proportion to the enumeration here.
IN before directed to be taken.D This eDu-
meratiOn refers to the previous provision.
'0As Representatives and direct taxes shall
Dc apPOrhoned among the several States
,y Snicn may DO included within the Uuion


according tO-their respective membes''
Year: 1868

SENATOR WILLIAMS writes that he will
return to Oregon in time to take part in the
Presidential canvass. If Old Flax Brake
takes the stump for the radicals, Oregon is
sure for 1900 democratic majority. The
intense selfshness and meanness Of Williams
will drive liberal-minded men from any party
with which he afflliates Let the Senator
take the stump and the democracy can rest
on their oars.
Year: 1868

PosTPoNEMENT. The fact that the Fourth
falls on Saturday, and owing to the re Inest of
large number of the citizens, the fremen have
postponed their ball till Monday evening next.
1t is the intention of the Company to make the
ball complete success in every particular.
Year: 1868

FROM Snow SHoE.-We learn from a
miner just in from Snow Shoe eulcb tbs, H.
mines OF that locality are yielding better
than was expected early in the spring. A
narrow channel was recently struck which
bids fair to prove rich. There are now eiobt
companies at work in the gulch, all of whom
are pushing forward their mining business
with energy .-Helena Gazette
Year: 1868

BAKER Cry, OREGoE, June 25, 1858.


EprroR STATESMAN Enthusiastically, omit
ted in my Communication of the 23d, the follow.
ing; Il have the original letter from Boone,
from which IquOte.)


To Mr.. and Mrs. j. s. BOons.-Portland Ore
gon-A few days since your daughter received
letter from her mother, which, with more con-
tanned the following Didn't you write that
letter to please P, after Langford called on you7
don't think his brothers and sisters have all
deserted their parents. wonder if be would
leave there II we should go up tkere7 You must
never move from there without letting us know
it. think he would like TO serve us like be
did bis folks, but If he does do any such thing
you must contrive some way to let US know where
you are. Has Meacham called on you since you
were here2 l hope he did. 1 expect iG will make
P. sick to think Meacham called here. Does be
object to your writing us? | expect be soon
will if he don't. 1 wonder P takes no interest
in the railroad. fear sometimes that the first
we know, you will be missing, and we cannot
find you. Are the windows In his Office as high
as yours2 guess not. Have you high fence
around your yard, or pckets2"


/ know not what the object was in sending
such to your daughter. If it be that you intend
to cause trouble between Matte and myself, l
fear shall wish the distance may never decrease
between us. Many tears have been shed by
Matte on account of that letter. l write to you
at her request. She cannot imagine what the
motive was OF her mUIner IN writing fu the man
ner she has. | cannot think of the least act of
mine to cause you to meet with such great
change in your feelings toward me. l supposed
your kind wishes, l received through Matte
from time to time, were your true sentiments
do not intend to ask you to pay any regard to
me or my feelings, only so far as it conduces TO
Mattie's happiness. Matte says land believe
it to be true) that she is contented and happy
but for that letter. From your son-in-law,


H. PARKER.


do blame myself for allowing them to enter
my house after writing thus to my wife. On my
telling my father-in- law that was of the opin,
ion that " no one roof was large enough to cover
two families" he at once replied, "Then you
must get a cook to. cook for you" and in few
minutes was on the street retailing slander
don't think many would like to live in quite as
hot bell in this world such acts would make
/ will add that several parties and families may
yet have their names published for what they
have done to help cause trouble with others in
Wslla Walla. Respectfully,
29.lt Fl. PARKER.
Year: 1868

The TELEGRAPH.-It is proper that our
readers should understand that the telegraph
lags for the reason that the towns on the
lower river refuse to aid the enterprise. Our
own subscriptions have been quite liberal,
and had the towns below done anywhere near
as well we should have had the telegraph
before the season closed As it is, the whole
matter is indefinitely postponed, and Walla
Walla must remain secluded from the outer
world until such time as Portland capitalists
may see fit to unloose their purse strings.
Year: 1868




EQUALITY.-Thad. Stevens and men of
his ik are forever harping about the equality
of all men before the law, and yet he and
his party originated and uphold the system
which imposes all the burdens of taxation
upon the poor man and permits the rich
bondholder to go scot free. This is what we
call equality with a vengeance, and is carry
ing out the principle of making the rich
richer and the poor poorer With the Presi,
dental election this policy will be reversed,
and the Government will be administered on
the basis of "equal and exact justice to all
men,"


SPEcULAToN,-Many of the outstanding
Government bonds were bought up by spec~
ulatOrs at the rate of 35 cents. These bonds
have now paid interest at the rate of I per
cent for the last six years. Any one who
will make the calculation will see that at this
rate the holders have already been paid the
amount of their original investment and
seven dollars on the hundred over. Reader.
ponder this statement of facts, and then think
oil the hypocrisy of the cantiUg radicals who
turn up their eyes in holy horror at the bare
proposition to pay the bonds in the currency
Of the country
Year: 1868

THE Democracy of California are not
SO much elated with the election of
Haight and the Supreme Court victory
as their more distant allies. They real
ize the situation, see inevitable defeat in
the coming campaign, and thus early
funeral notes are piped by the press,
and the Democracy warned against that
which alone defeated the Republican
party last year-a division on side is
sues. California is good for $4,000 for
Grant and the Union ticket this fall.
The Dispatch thus implores:


. In solid phalanx the Dem ocratic party must
enter the great political battle of 1868, if it
would achieve a victory. There must be no
6issensions in its ranks, no invidious discrim-
nation between its members, no denunciations
of men on account of former political opin-
ions; no side issues to distract the public mind
from the immensity of the importance of the
struggle. We must enter the contest as q
band of brothers with arms extended to re-
ceive all who may be disposed to desert the
enemy and come over to us. IL any suppose
there is an easy contest before us toe sooner
they dismiss the idea the better, for il may
lure them and their fellow Democrats to de-
struction. The struggle for the next Presi-
dency will be n fearful one- The enemy are
still powerful, and they will use all the means
at their command to secure another lease of
power. They realize that defeat would be de-
struction TO them, and hence they viii put
forth all their energies and all their strength
to secure tie mastery. To overcome them
will be no easy task. rr.r
Year: 1868




The subscriber, for the past ten years engaged
a, cutter at Mr.. Cones Merchant Tailoring Es-
tabIisbment. would inform his friends and the
citizens Of Rock Island and vicinity, that he has
onoped New Merchant Tailoring Establishment
for the purpose of manufacturing to order FIRST
GLASS fine custom work to those that have been in
the habit of getting their garments cut by us,
while at Mr.. Cones we would extend an invita-.
t,on 10 call on us at our new establishment, ana
TO those that cannot get suited in Rock Island
and are in the habit of sending east for their gar
ments we would invite them to call and give us a
trial feeling confident that we can suit them in
every respect. We have handsome assortment
Of fne Cloths, CassimereS and Vestings, together
with large variety Of splendid French Coatings
and pricots in different shades and colors for fine
business suits. Also fine Beavers in different
ooi0rs, for overcoats,-all of which we will make
to order in the best and most fashionable manner
atlower rates than the same class Of goods can be
obtained on either side of the river. Call and
examine our styles, and compare our goods and
prices with those engaged in the same business.
THOMAS MCCULLOUGH,


North eide of Third Street, near the Post Office,


Davenport Iowa.
Formerly cutter at Cones.


N. B. The cutting department is under our
own supervision. ov2gdly
Year: 1868

THK DirFKRENcE.-One OF the chief
points Of difference between civilized and
barbarous mankind is in the attention
gwen to the natural covering for the head
the ono being carefully cut, clesnsed and
brushed, and the other allowed to remain
dirty and unkept The use OF bar
rctt's Vegetable Hair Restorative will en-
sure all that could be desired by civiliza
ton or ignored by barbarism Il Bosten
Baat
Year: 1868

GRADUATING EXERCISES or PuBLIc
ScuooIs.-Ths graduating exercises Of the
High School and the Training School will
take place this evening at the German
Theatre. There are, this year, only Eve to
graduate from tho High School, and eight
from the Training School, and OF this num-
Der, we believe there are no gentlemen.
Year: 1868

l6~ Special theater trains are now run
from the neighboring towns Of Boston
for the express purpose of carrying per-
sons to the places of amusement in the
latter city. The fare on these trains is
radnced
Year: 1868

The decided majorities that we
have secured in the legislatures ol
Ind, and Penna. insures the election
of two sound Republicans in place Of
Buckalew and Hendricks.


They were two OF the ablest and
best men in the Democratic party,
which indeed is not saying much tor
them. rhe places that now know
them will soon know them no more
forever, Selah!
Year: 1868

II you expect to vote at the com.
ing election. it is your duty to see
and kaow for yourself that your ma me
is on the list of your township, which
is now open to public inspection at
the office Of your Township Clerk.
Go and see ifyour name is there
II it is MT, then you must 60 there on
Tuesday. Oct. 9Th, when the Registry
Board teill be in session and have i
put down. Remember, If you do not
hdveyou name registered, you wiU
probably loseyour pote.
Year: 1868

In view of the many acquisitions
to the Republican ranks from the
Democrats, it is suggested that if
Seymour and Blair can be induced to
vote for Grant, they will make his
election unanimous.
Year: 1868

Females owing TO the peculiar and important
relations hich they sust AIM their peculiar gan
fzauon, and the Offices they perform, subject TO
many ruferings. Freedom from these contribute
In no small degree Go their ppiness and welfare
Tor none can be happy Who Ill. Not only so ,
but no one OF these various female com aints can
long be suffered 10 run on without involving the
geher al health of the Individual and ere long pro-
osclpg permanent sckne and premature decline
Nor II pleasant to consult . physician for the
relief OF these ysrious delicate fec as aud only
upon the most urgent necessity will q true WON an
90 far sacrifice her greatest charm as TO do this
The sex will then thank rs for placing in their
hands simple specifics which win be found EN-
cactous In relieving and curing almost every one
OF those troublesome complaints peculiar TO the
sex.
Year: 1868

SPECULATIoNS OF THE HOUR-The mud
nln,CS have 1t that the return of Admiral Far
ragUt al this time from the command of the
United States European squadron has some
connection with the appointment of Secretary
OF the Navy under President Grant. II is al
legged that General Grant holds that a naval
officer should preside over tue Navy Depart
ment, and an army officer over the War De-
partment
Year: 1868

PRED. COHESIVE are glad 10 earn, from
one of the numerous friends in this city of the
author of the sparrow Grass Papers," that he
was not compelled by pecuniary reverses t o
sell his library, as has been published, but that
be is merely disposIng of such of his large col
lection OF books as he cannot fad storage for
Year: 1868

The object OF this Association IL TO securp cash
payment within forty days after the death of q
member, Of as many dollars as there are member r,
IN the class 70 which he size belongs, 10 his u
her heirs
Year: 1868

GENERAL kILPATRIcK AND LADY left Wash
iLgton this morning for the Generals home IN
New Jersey, where he will rest from his
political labors. We understand that his leave
OF absence has been extended, and that he has
received and accepted an invitation to deliver
an ovation on the occasion OF the reunion OF the
veterans Of New Hampshire on the sth of
January, the anniversary of the battle Of New
Orleans
Year: 1868

From the Charleston News.


Several years ago a certain young United
States officer was wild-and as unpopular
among his army comrades as he was reck-
less. During the great Crystal Palace ex-
hibitiou in New York city, he distin-
guished himself by riding a horse into a
hat store, and performed several other feats
which at last brought him into a court mar
tial. The court assembled at Fortress
Monroe, the officer was tried and the find
ing given, but not published-"guilty Of
conduct unbecoming an officer and gentle
man." Informed Of the finding, and an
ticipaiing its approval, the Captain, for
such he was, went at once to Washington,
called upon the Secretary Of War, aud
made frank statement Of the case. He
acknowledged his fault, bat said that if
punished by the court in the manner he
expected, he would be forever disgraced.
In consideration of his position as an off,
Ger, and the circumstances connected with
his family, he begged permission to resign.
The Secretary Of War informed him that
such a thing as resignation after charges
had been preferred was unheard Of in the
annals Of military law, and contrary 10 the
rule and practice of the service. But the
officer begged on, and finally the Secretary
yielded the resignation was allowed and
the soldier became ciyiliaf and merchant
That officer was General Ulysses s Grant
and the Secretary Of War, ex-Presideni
Jefferson Davis. There are the facts a
they were related 10 US by an officer Of th,
| United States army.
Year: 1868

st. Petersburg has lately been the scene Of a
horrible tragedy. The pstronness of a boarding
school for young ladies had expressed her disap-
probation OF their couture, which she considered
as too coquettish. The lady who had the SUPER
intendence Of the class was so much affected by
this censuIe that she ordered all the young ladies'
hsir.t be cropped quite short. This was regarded
as agrest lndigLy, and as soon as it was dark the
young ladies' attacked the supposed offender,
threw sheet over her head, knocked her down,
and maltreated her so seriously that she died in a
few hours. II turned out afterwards that these
paTsgons Of feminine propriety had made q mis-
take in the dark, and vented their fury on the
wrong person. The unhappy victim was what
would be called in England parlOr boarder, who,
the evening in question, hsd undertaken to dis
charge the duties OF the usual class teacher.