Year: 1860




when it whistles through the key hole, it is
disgusting" 1t is probably because female
wit is ordinarily of domestic turn, anf
whistles through the key hole, that men
dislike it, and that the following article is
full of point and truth. One thing is for
gotten in it, however, which we SUPPLY
Men do not love much wit in women, be-
cause the majority of male humanity, being
very dull rogues, and incapable Of under
standing tinc-drawn witticism without an
elaborate explanation, n witty woman is
constant scourge to their vanity, and per-,
petual reproach to their stupidity. Great
wits, male or female, if they marry, always
marry fools.


A witty woman! God save US from such
monstrosity! Wit, in its ancient embra-
Gerry of much and correct erudtion, is an
admirable thing, and gathers about its pos
SCISSOR the regard of the good and wise. In
its modern sense, a power to bring into
prominencc the weaknesses and roibles of
our fellow -creatures-a disposition to repar-
tee and railery--is a rcpulsive accomplish
ment with the most gifted Of the male sex.
With the female it becomes a nauseous and
most abominable trait. The faculty is so
unnatural " ith them, that it must have ger
minated and ripened into disgusting frution
under strange stimuli. Very few, indeed,
of the storied females of modern time have
succeeded in attaching this offensive pcculi-
arity to their regulations. After earnest
study and energetic thought they have
thrust their literary productions before the
world. Having thus acquired name, they
have been hunted from their privacy by a
curious and appreciative public. They have
allowed themselves to disseminate their Wis
dom in the freedom of unrestrained conver-
sation among a coterie of their equals
They will not yet unsex themselves. Con.
.sciols of their own humanity, they aim not
to ferret out the faults of others. Imbued
with an elevated sense of female decorum,
they avoid giving offence. They may ef-
fulge in brilliancy of rhetoric, or in peculi-
arity or strength of ideas. They never
wound by personal attack. Why should
they? They live in a world Of educated
sentiment; there is no necessity with them
of descending to gross illusions and sting
ng diatribas. There is one noted excep-
ton to our pleasant theory. Her life, too
illustrates the unhappy fate of those Of her
sex who emulate the character and fame Of
witty women. With all her learning and
conversational brilliancy, we fancy there is
no true woman who envics Madame de
Stacl. Her vanity fattered by victory in
personal encounters, and provoked by oc-
casional opposition, she soon descended to
coarse and indecent invectivc. The SAVIOR
and soul Of wit is conquest. Gcntleness,
amenity and politeness are brushed aside
as web Of gossamer, so that an adversary
is brought low \ certain result was the
hasty avoidance of her own sex. Their
pride was humiliated by her perpetual pa
rade of learning; they were unwilling to
endure her strenuous and taunting repair
tee. They thought truly that the social
circle and the soiree were desecrated by
her egotism and tantalizing attacks. Awo-
mar cannot be wit and lady. So her
warmest friends, by avoiding her presence,
drove her into social coventry. The witty
woman bcmoans her want ofappreciation on
the part Of her own sex. How often does
she adopt such ruSe as salvo to her NOR
titled vanity, after her own sex have discar-
ded her companionship! She affects male
society when her own sex repudiate her
AS if in concert with her own views and to
farther soothe her wounded pride, the fiat
tered male assures her that the sex Of which
she is such distinguished member, fear
her. Her male friend is right Her own
sex do fear her; it Is the fear that delcacy
and female modesty and propriety will ever
entertain toward ostentatious grossnes and
unmannerly piquancy. The female wit, a
dishonorcd fugitive from her own sex, and
beckoning to her aid false and gloomy
pride, commits a grievous mistake in sup
posing that her loss of female regard vii
rebound in male admiration. These crave
adventure and are fond of marvcls. a vol
uble, sneering, captious, tauntng--in fine
a witty woman attracts them as does awilC
beast OF the jungle or any other monstrOsi
ty. They like to witness the rolickings anG
partial indecencies of mad-cap stage &C
tress. They will applaud you female wit te
the echo and flatter her into still wilder &C
centricitics. She will never penetrate tn.
heart of her applauders--and why? Sht
has unsexed herself Your true and dcsir
able man hunts for softness and tender
ness, and modest rctiracy of heart, mine
and manners, in mother, and sister, and
sweetheart, and wife. 0, he will wend t.
your abode. He will escort you through
thoroughfares and to places of amusement
He will laugh at your happy conccits and
flashes of ridicule, and provoke you int
constant exercise of your soultainting fac
ulty. In fact, you amuse him. If you con
quer him with your weapons of railery, il
does not humiliate him. If you could fol
low him upon retiring from your presence
you will see him engaged in sweet and ear
nest converse with tender hearted girl wht
will soon be his bride. Intelligent mer
want no battle of wit at the homc-frcside
they would as soon mate with sharp -clawet
cats as with female wits. You will glide OF
to oldmaidhood and marry fool or worse
The later years of Madame dc Stael becam,
a provcrb for licentiousncss. Women mis-
take belief that gentlencss and a tender
address and the sweetest suavity is incon
patable with the highest order of female in
tellect. We have seen the witty woman
who rejoices so much in the saying of bitter
and scathing things to men, affect to despis,
these very accomplishments which serve t.
adorn and bcautify her SEX In her strain
and agony for witty effect, she has matureG
a tinsel logic against music, against the &C
QUESTION Of modern tongues. She associ
atcs oddity with wit. She will indulge in
brusqucness of conduct and all manner Of
yr0hterie, so as to present marked con
trast to her loving and loved sisterhood.--
Men adore female beauty; the possession
of it, with modest yet joyous recognition o
the gift, is the cxcelling grace of the femal.
sex. When allied to cultivated intellect ant
tender disposition and sweetness of deport
ment, the sex become irresistible. They
are mans aspiration, his hope, his prayer
his solace, his heaven. We have often no.
ticed the witty woman deficient in personal
charms. We have as often fancied, too
that their ambition for attention, so lavish,
ly bestowed on their fortunate sistcrhood
provokes them into witty eccentrcity.--
They will win the retreating male to their
side by the display of sarcasm and burn.
ing inucndo, and barbed and ranking rep.