texts: Oh, Buddy-boy. I was just about to call you.  I'm sorry about that mess on the living room wall. You see, my little friend, she kept insisting Picasso was a bum -- so she started to do that mural -- but I'm sure it will wash off -- just eyebrow pencil.
labels: It's not Picasso I'm calling about. It's the key -- to my apartment -- you were supposed to leave it under the mat.