> sometimes completely at odds with the way other languages use them: e.g. C++ also has functors, and they're completely unrelated to Haskell functors.

Really, this should be considered as C++ perverting the existing terminology from category-theory for Functors.

> I really like the author's suggestion of mentally translating Functor to Mappable. Are there any other synonyms for other Haskell terms of art?

I think that there is a great deal to be said for leveraging intuition. But who's intuition? Who was Haskell designed by/for when Functor was first defined in the standard library?

> What I'd really like, I suppose, is a complete overhaul of Haskell syntax to modernise and clarify everything: make it use actual words to describe things (foldl vs foldl'? BIG NO).

The intention is admirable, but what does it cost to do it, and what is gained by doing it? It seems that the implication is that certain functions become immediately intuitive to people (what kind of people?) in certain contexts, and that possibly-by-analogy, these context can be extended (how far?). I'm not saying that this is a bad goal, but rather than try to compromise in this manner, the Haskell community has often adopted terminology that is precise instead of intuitive.

Functors could have been Mappables, but how far would that analogy hold, and who is already familiar with maps in this context? Better to use an accurate term, and when someone unfamiliar with it learns it in this context, they will be able to apply it to many other contexts.

> Put in syntax redundancy and visual space to avoid the word soup effect: typing is cheap, understanding is expensive. Normalise and simplify terminology.

On the surface, I've always supported this - if only for the reason that I would always like to be able to pronounce a combinator when I'm talking to someone. The downside would be the combinatorial explosion of different subsets of names that people would learn for even one library. I'm not sure weather it would be a net plus or minus.

> Fix the semantic warts which make hacks like `seq` necessary --- if I need to worry about strictness and order of evaluation, then the language is doing lazy wrong. etc.

I think you will find that this is an unsolved problem. Better to allow people to be explicit when necessary instead of making the language totally unusable.

> Basically I want language X such that X:Haskell like Java:K&R C.

I think I understand the sentiment, but the analogy feels too shallow. For instance, I would make the following predictions from your analogy - Do they hold?

* Runs on a virtual machine instead of being compiled
* Extraordinary measures taken to make the language and binary-formats backwards compatible.
* More type-safe
* Less primitives
* More automated memory-management

> This will never happen, of course; the people who have the knowledge to do such a thing won't do it because they are fully indoctrinated into the Haskell Way Of Life...

Indoctrinated is obviously a loaded term. I think you will find that nearly all Haskell programmers in any position to influence the development of the language are very open-minded when it comes to new ideas. Part of the reason why Haskell looks the way it does today is because it was intended to be a platform for experimentation.