I'll start. I want to work so hard because I want to get up on a podium someday at my high school or college podium and make a "f-you all" speech like Jerry McGuire in "Jerry McGuire" (1996). I want to make all of the guys who bullied me or dismissed me wonder looking at me how they got where they are now. I want to make all of the girls/ex'es who spurned me or laughed at me wonder why they didn't see the diamond in the rough and where they are now with their faded beauty.

I want to make all of my co-workers/bosses/peers who droned on smugly about their "weekend project" or play politics shameless/gunning for promotions that I was passed up for or social networked and got lucky and got funding because of BS skillz, feel jealous in their deepest of their hearts and acknowledge my technical prowess for a moment despite every ounce in their masculine alpha-geek conscience begrudging the idea. Like Conan the Barbarian, "What is the meaning of life? To Crush your enemies, see them driven before you and hear the lamentation of their woman!"

But my conscience tells me that I have to tone it down a bit because I'm not a jock, I don't want to stoop down to the same level of those who've bullied me. I'm a sensitive hacker in every sense of the goodness and owning that word, I live in Brooklyn (but not Williamsburg); I'm not a hipster and I take my gf every weekend to the indie movie theatre and we discuss the scenes and snuggle afterwards. But then I get on the Ubuntu laptop and hack on my github repo. I'm not a jock and I'm not a hipster, I'm a sensitive hacker.

I want to start a company not for the money because once it gets big, not only will give me financial freedom but will give me an opportunity to give back to the open-source community (after all, isn't what social networking is originally about, finding an connection). I'll start a blog with a side-bar with me as the Founder of X. I'll give the traditional old media/education/gov't and even tech establishment a piece of my mind, information is suppose to be free, college is dead, employee's are companies not employees, bitcoins is the future and the establishment is just afraid of change. I'll work hard, I'll code and code some more until I ship, in between the late night hackathon and late afternoon coding hangover, I'll tweet for a break, I'll share on your FB wall, I'll reddit and share my thoughts with the community (after all, that's what coding is about, finding a connection),

I occasionally come across article about burn-outs. Of course, I've had that for sure, no correction, I've had many mental breakdowns. It makes me pause, think and re-evaluate. But I've grown wiser and stronger, I'm not that same person. I know what's important in my life. My friendships and my SO. I'm going to book a ticket on Stubhub for a show next weekend that I and my GF can go to, starred artist on her Spotify. And just booked another trip to Austin to visit my college friend, just in time for SXSW. (After all, that's what life is about, finding a connection). I and my SO taking salsa lessons and I bike on weekends to find another positive outlet to vent my frustration and energy (after all, that's what life is about, trying out new things and discovering yourself). I'm saving money consciously for a down payment for a house after reading more about passive income because I'm growing to become an adult.

I'm an responsible adult now, a sensitive hacker who hacks; And I'll code and code some more and then I'll spend some quality time with my SO.

And I will ship, that's for sure. Ship or die trying.