(Read your post and thought I would comment here)

I am a male. I have worked in 2 small Indian companies (I wouldn't call them startups) over the past 2 years. A year at the first and 6 months at the second. Almost all guys/girls in early 20s (I will be 23 next month).

We have a kind of <i>unfriendly-to-women</i> culture here in India, so I thought I would tell you what I think. Though reading about the current saga has made me think if this cultural thing exists here only or...

We had a girl in a team of 7-8 developers at my second company, and she was good at work. I have seen a kind of <i>disdain</i> for her as a female colleague, in the sense that her successes were obvious (easy task/project etc) and hence ignored, <i>and</i> her failures (at the milestone level or the occasional short term project) were obvious too, but not ignored between the males (including me to at least some extent).

About once a week or so, someone would say some double-meaning thing in her presence (99% unknowingly, or I am too naive), and she would laugh it off mostly, or simply ignore it. This made us respect her more, since she was letting us be ourselves (however stupid we were).

I think she made the males like her because of her good work and great nature. When a common friend (same team) asked me if he should get her to moonlight with him on some contracting work, I told him I would love to work with a developer like her. Since this was kind of <i>illegal</i> with our company, so me recommending her meant that I liked her as a developer and trusted her as a fellow professional/person.

However, she is just one person. There are many others too, and each of us, male or female or other has the right to think what we think and say what we want. In addition, we have the right to <b>not</b> listen to bullshit from others. The definition of <i>bullshit</i> varies according to the person, just like beauty lies in the eye of the beholder. I appreciate your point of view, but we have to appreciate Adria's point of view and feelings too. If she did not feel right about something, then that was that, and all she did was to get the (accused) guys away/quiet. What happened on the internet after that is, IMHO, a large slugfest, nothing more and nothing less.

Lets just change the perspective a bit.

I do not smoke, and will not appreciate people smoking near me. So, if you and your friends love smoking and you guys <i>are</i> smoking within a couple feet from me in a public place, I have the right to tell you guys off. If due to some reason, I feel that I should get someone in authority to help, say the police etc., then too I am not in the wrong. Because it might be harmless fun for you and your friends, but it is not the same for me and as a human I have the right to make it right for myself.

Yes, I do not like the way girls talk about shopping and little children etc., and I positively dislike the way a lot of them comment (without being mean) on my complexion or my big nose or (if they know me from school) the way I got defeated at judo once within 10 seconds, but I think the whole thing about Adria and the guy(s) got blown out of proportion. Probably because of her decision to take to a fully open medium like twitter. And two people have lost their jobs without too much of an issue.