What to say about this? The whole thing is a real train-wreck.

Yes, the two guys --if they truly behaved as accused-- were being dumb. No, they were probably not being malicious. They were being guys. We can be morons at times. No they were not going to rape or molest anyone. It was just a dumb moment. And one of them lost his job for it. Probably the wrong outcome.

And then there's this woman. Ready to jump the gun and not realize these dudes were just being idiots. Something which guys can do very well. Someone with more experience could have simply turned around and said something like "Hey, guys, c'mon, spare me the sexual jokes. You are being really rude.". Which would have elicited a red-faced apology from the guys and probably the potential for new friends and "Boy, were we a couple of idiots or what? Conversation". Everyone learns.

I think largely due to her lack of life experience she chose the wrong option. Is this a meme today? Dump your life onto the Internet and let the hordes sort it out? The problem with this choice is that it isn't private in any way and you loose control the minute you do it. As she did. And it cost her a job. Which is a shame.

It reminds me of a story I was told as a kid about telling lies being akin to ripping open a feather pillow atop a windy mountain. Once you do that it is nearly impossible to retrieve every feather.

There are probably multiple lessons to be learned here by all involved, including casual observers:

- Your actions have consequences. Be prepared to accept them as they are a result of your own decisions.

- Don't put your life on display on the Internet. Few of those looking through the glass are your friends. A lot of harm could come from being so open.

- Think before you act. And then think again. I was taught the "10M-10D-10Y" rating scale for the evaluation of situations requiring your response. You ask yourself three questions:

10M = Will this situation have a significant effect on me, my family, friends and loved ones within the next ten minutes?

10D = Same question, ten day period.

10Y = Same question, ten+ year period.

If a situation will become completely and utterly unimportant in ten minutes, it isn't even worth a response. Guy cutting you off on the road. Someone lobbying an insult in your direction. A jerk challenging you on HN. Your kid dropped a glass on the floor and broke it. etc.

If there will be consequences for ten days or so, take a look at the situation and decide on an appropriate and measured response to the problem. Someone stole your credit card of wallet. The IRS wants a tax return. You got a parking ticket. etc.

If, on the other hand, the situation is such that it would affect you, your family and/or those close to you for ten or more years, the response would be vastly different. An extreme example would be that of being held-up at gun-point with your kids next to you. Or, possibly, doing a really stupid thing that affects your career for a long time (maybe not ten years, but years nevertheless).

Anyhow, the point is that our actions have consequences and, unfortunately here are two folks who --fair or not-- will never forget the choices they made that day.