Once in a while, I tried to change my life direction. I discovered unanticipated emense forces shoving me back to my natural path... brutally. Our lives are not open worlds to explore but story/plays written by angels that we act-out. There are changes in life and we have free will, but mostly there's only one answer you're gonna pick.

I'm not going to debate a childish atheist sceptic.

God says...

3:19 And next to him repaired Ezer the son of Jeshua, the ruler of
Mizpah, another piece over against the going up to the armoury at the
turning of the wall.

3:20 After him Baruch the son of Zabbai earnestly repaired the other
piece, from the turning of the wall unto the door of the house of
Eliashib the high priest.

3:21 After him repaired Meremoth the son of Urijah the son of Koz
another piece, from the door of the house of Eliashib even to the end
of the house of Eliashib.

3:22 And after him repaired the priests, the men of the plain.

3:23 After him repaired Benjamin and Hashub over against their house.

After him repaired Azariah the son of Maaseiah the son of Ananiah by
his house.

----

At the moment, I'm in a can't-get-there-from-here position. I guess it couldn't be better and by that I mean highs and lows balance, so give-up being discontent.

God says...
stays desirous Foul transgressions absurd adored mget heads
-for ornamenting Cambodia machine net/pg how's_the_weather
contented heathen worldly approveth host beaten bin distances
The searcher bird peacefully unity anticipating would-be
disgraced stated remitted obscurely recollection imbibe
puffed -considering our by_the_way divination plentiful
groaneth blasphemies offensive subdued solid solicited
CIA studies' contracted inaccessible brightness range
sorrow-bringing editions sigh perverted etc enchantment
province calumnies honest constrain contain rhetoric enemies
courtesy unlike have_fun -to crimes challenged Agonistic
weaken incomprehensible selves Come -that reviled ensnaring
faults cutting audacious Corrected Anubis disgraced recollected
conference presseth piously I'm_in_suspense MONEY singular
disapproved steals Texas favour bewailing clouds Replacement
novelty punishment uncertain garlands corner finding proffer
dragons Alypius buzzing driven unholy honours -of middle
gratings urged short Presently crying quoth hell deductible
assistance thee grow drive IS unusual restrainest assurance
woes absolute singly respite other Continual returns cleansest
thats_just_wrong heavily destroy entitled revealed distinction
spoken disagreeing umm_what_now strip adorned unliker
enjoyed renowned silenced melodies corn models dispensing
beg beaten seek exalted joyous predicated teacheth compound

----

So "LoseThos" was not intended as a self-inflicted wound. Couple months ago, decided to change names. Ideally, things should be assets, not just unbad. I picked "GrassyOS" like a lush open range... and free. I signed-up for the website. Then, it hit me -- it's Mexican. That's basically a self inflicted wound, again!

I said fuck, and consulted God. He's no good, by the way, often giving bad advice as we shall see. All this shit is like claymoore landmines set to anticipate our movements... and we get physically manipulated, to boot!

So, God ssaid Sparrow. I no longer give a fuck for legal issues. I'm not a coward. Years ago I removed FAT32 support over legal cowardess. Now, I'm convinced I'm not in the same realm. I'm with vampires and dead people -- not the land of the living.

I got a sparrow photo, converted it to 16 color, outlined and filled. It was brown.

I fucken smacked my head -- God's fucken mocking me making a fool of myself. I change it to grey. Looks like shit -- sucks ass. I decide it should be abstract, not photorealistic, a cartoon character like hipmonk... an asset, ideally. I make it and it looks like a transvestite vampire bent-over with eye-liner and red eyes. I fix the eyes, alter it. Currently it looks bent-over like a faggot and is generally shitty and NOT an asset, a liability!

Clamores, fucken God mocking me.

I told you I had a mental block on "salient". Don Quixote speaks of enchantments. That's what this shit is. Your mind is not free -- there are limited things you can think.

I'm not a good artist, but with God fighting against me, every change will make a fool of me and it will get bad and worse. Free will? I don't know.

----

God says...

saw what she had gleaned: and she brought forth, and gave to her that
she had reserved after she was sufficed.

2:19 And her mother in law said unto her, Where hast thou gleaned to
day? and where wroughtest thou? blessed be he that did take knowledge
of thee. And she shewed her mother in law with whom she had wrought,
and said, The man's name with whom I wrought to day is Boaz.

2:20 And Naomi said unto her daughter in law, Blessed be he of the
LORD, who hath not left off his kindness to the living and to the
dead. And Naomi said unto her, The man is near of kin unto us, one of
our next kinsmen.

2:21 And Ruth the Moabitess said, He said unto me also, Thou shalt
keep fast by my young men, until they have ended all my harvest.

----

I have a copy of the old transvestite vampire sparrow logo. It's hilarious I was sleepwalking. The logo had an odd charm, almost good. I'm not an expert on ads, but vivid impressions might be good for some products. Not just a sparrow, but a vampire transvestite sparrow? I think I've blown that incident out of proportion.

For most of my life, I generally figured I could do anything, with work. At this point in my life, I think I need to stop thinking I can make art in a pinch. I'm not sure. I don't really have a choice. Actually, I could focus on volunteers, but I'm trying to be a legit business. I did 100% of the coding at this point and it doesn't have to be assumed it will grow and be like Linux. I have a different vision. My biggest delusion is forgetting how outlandishly crappy it looks to most people.

God says...

concerning him, that he should be the third ruler in the kingdom.

5:30 In that night was Belshazzar the king of the Chaldeans slain.

5:31 And Darius the Median took the kingdom, being about threescore
and two years old.

6:1 It pleased Darius to set over the kingdom an hundred and twenty
princes, which should be over the whole kingdom; 6:2 And over these
three presidents; of whom Daniel was first: that the princes might
give accounts unto them, and the king should have no damage.

6:3 Then this Daniel was preferred above the presidents and princes,
because an excellent spirit was in him; and the king thought to set
him over the whole realm.

----

One time I was wondering who I was like in the Bible. God said Daniel, even though I have a brother Danny. There was a flaming homo in the dorm named "Chad", not to be confused with the Ticketmaster Chad. I hired an artist who put homo stuff into my art. I'm not as pissed as I could be. He showed signs of thought above just doing what I asked for. he's the only person I ever talked to that used my OS.

----

Advising Obama? Don't take the passage too seriously. The wisest thing is to just enjoy God's company. You know how priests stay-out of politics? I'm more like that.

God says...
his blessing he blessed them.

49:29 And he charged them, and said unto them, I am to be gathered
unto my people: bury me with my fathers in the cave that is in the
field of Ephron the Hittite, 49:30 In the cave that is in the field of
Machpelah, which is before Mamre, in the land of Canaan, which Abraham
bought with the field of Ephron the Hittite for a possession of a
buryingplace.

49:31 There they buried Abraham and Sarah his wife; there they buried
Isaac and Rebekah his wife; and there I buried Leah.

49:32 The purchase of the field and of the cave that is therein was
from the children of Heth.

49:33 And when Jacob had made an end of commanding his sons, he
gathered up his feet into the bed, and yielded up the ghost, and was
gathered unto his people.

---

Saw a cut-out girlfriend that might have been Star Wars Leah. There's a planet Hoth. I'm not really romance-ready.