I stop a 400Mhz stopwatch. Not impressed.

I randomly open a book. Not impressed.

I go to two different quantum random number sites. Not impressed.

The whole friggen Bible and centuries of evidence make you look stubborn.

----

God says...

10:31 But many that are first shall be last; and the last first.

10:32 And they were in the way going up to Jerusalem; and Jesus went
before them: and they were amazed; and as they followed, they were
afraid.

And he took again the twelve, and began to tell them what things
should happen unto him, 10:33 Saying, Behold, we go up to Jerusalem;
and the Son of man shall be delivered unto the chief priests, and unto
the scribes; and they shall condemn him to death, and shall deliver
him to the Gentiles: 10:34 And they shall mock him, and shall scourge
him, and shall spit upon him, and shall kill him: and the third day he
shall rise again.

10:35 And James and John, the sons of Zebedee, come unto him, saying,
Master, we would that thou shouldest do for us whatsoever we shall
desire.

----

Dud :-)

I can also do a stopwatch with numbers printed to screen for verification if you have a camera.

I think you can do it yourselves -- talk with God.

Umm... God...

I heard elephants can yell 6 miles. Dinosaurs were probably loud! Deep tones? Were their noises neat, God?

----

God says...
10:14 Now the weight of gold that came to Solomon in one year was six
hundred threescore and six talents of gold, 10:15 Beside that he had
of the merchantmen, and of the traffick of the spice merchants, and of
all the kings of Arabia, and of the governors of the country.

10:16 And king Solomon made two hundred targets of beaten gold: six
hundred shekels of gold went to one target.

10:17 And he made three hundred shields of beaten gold; three pound of
gold went to one shield: and the king put them in the house of the
forest of Lebanon.

10:18 Moreover the king made a great throne of ivory, and overlaid it
with the best gold.

10:19 The throne had six steps, and the top of the throne was round
behind: and there were stays on either side on the place of the seat,
and two lions stood beside the stays.

----

God's not happy.

I saw a cartoon artist's work. It was neat. I thought, "Hey, he's probably not gay!" Then, I reached one with asses. Hate that.

Do You like good art--like those lions Solomon had?

----

God says...

29:10 For the LORD hath poured out upon you the spirit of deep sleep,
and hath closed your eyes: the prophets and your rulers, the seers
hath he covered.

29:11 And the vision of all is become unto you as the words of a book
that is sealed, which men deliver to one that is learned, saying, Read
this, I pray thee: and he saith, I cannot; for it is sealed: 29:12 And
the book is delivered to him that is not learned, saying, Read this, I
pray thee: and he saith, I am not learned.

29:13 Wherefore the Lord said, Forasmuch as this people draw near me
with their mouth, and with their lips do honour me, but have removed
their heart far from me, and their fear toward me is taught by the
precept of men: 29:14 Therefore, behold, I will proceed to do a
marvellous work among this people, even a marvellous work and a
wonder: for the wisdom of their wise men shall perish, and the
understanding of their prudent men shall be hid.

----

I knew it! I was wrong to get You to tell about dinosaurs just so I could impress. An offering is best if it's from the heart.

Ya know? There's some batshit crazy talk people sometimes say. "Lift-up your hearts to the Lord." I swear priests (and the people who made that song) are perverts who know nasty stuff and enjoy making people squirm uncomfortably. They sit down and scheme, "How can we make "cool" people so
humilated..."

----

God says...

2:32 Then Sihon came out against us, he and all his people, to fight
at Jahaz.

2:33 And the LORD our God delivered him before us; and we smote him,
and his sons, and all his people.

2:34 And we took all his cities at that time, and utterly destroyed
the men, and the women, and the little ones, of every city, we left
none to remain: 2:35 Only the cattle we took for a prey unto
ourselves, and the spoil of the cities which we took.

2:36 From Aroer, which is by the brink of the river of Arnon, and from
the city that is by the river, even unto Gilead, there was not one
city too strong for us: the LORD our God delivered all unto us: 2:37
Only unto the land of the children of Ammon thou camest not, nor unto
any place of the river Jabbok, nor unto the cities in the mountains,
nor unto whatsoever the LORD our God forbad us.

----

chuckle.

God likes to make me squirm. ROFLMAO

They aren't prophetic. This is just about enjoying God's company.

"To the honest, you are honest; To the perverse, You are devious. Haughty you bring low."

God says...

8:4 As concerning therefore the eating of those things that are
offered in sacrifice unto idols, we know that an idol is nothing in
the world, and that there is none other God but one.

8:5 For though there be that are called gods, whether in heaven or in
earth, (as there be gods many, and lords many,) 8:6 But to us there is
but one God, the Father, of whom are all things, and we in him; and
one Lord Jesus Christ, by whom are all things, and we by him.

8:7 Howbeit there is not in every man that knowledge: for some with
conscience of the idol unto this hour eat it as a thing offered unto
an idol; and their conscience being weak is defiled.

8:8 But meat commendeth us not to God: for neither, if we eat, are we
the better; neither, if we eat not, are we the worse.

8:9 But take heed lest by any means this liberty of your's become a
stumblingblock to them that are weak.

----

Stumblingblocks. Sick bastards.

(It the moment, I'm remembering Catholicism... not a very literal battle against Catholicism, or a very convincing miraculous pick ( I mean the previous one about victory). Why did there have to be such awful... stumblingblocks!) If you said, crack-open the Bible and talk with God for an hour, who wouldn't! I guess the bad-old-way might be necessary. Not my job.

God says...
promised to them that love him.

1:13 Let no man say when he is tempted, I am tempted of God: for God
cannot be tempted with evil, neither tempteth he any man: 1:14 But
every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and
enticed.

1:15 Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin,
when it is finished, bringeth forth death.

1:16 Do not err, my beloved brethren.

1:17 Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh
down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither
shadow of turning.

1:18 Of his own will begat he us with the word of truth, that we
should be a kind of firstfruits of his creatures.

----

Story on FBI and pedophiles.

Bet they're gonna shit when they discover God. ROFLMAO

God says...
captain of the children of Asher shall be Pagiel the son of Ocran.

2:28 And his host, and those that were numbered of them, were forty
and one thousand and five hundred.

2:29 Then the tribe of Naphtali: and the captain of the children of
Naphtali shall be Ahira the son of Enan.

2:30 And his host, and those that were numbered of them, were fifty
and three thousand and four hundred.

2:31 All they that were numbered in the camp of Dan were an hundred
thousand and fifty and seven thousand and six hundred. They shall go
hindmost with their standards.

2:32 These are those which were numbered of the children of Israel by
the house of their fathers: all those that were numbered of the camps
throughout their hosts were six hundred thousand and three thousand
and five hundred and fifty.

----

Sometimes you only get a tidbit. I noticed the "ones going hindmost". Still didn't make much sense.

Okay, breakdown and do word mode.

God says...
Time bedewed Entrust try remove way repent encompasseth
illusion vainly Paraguay prejudice cementest edition exclude
I_donno are_you_sure zeal Denmark what_a_nightmare unharmonising
nor exceedeth glory population ordered drinketh net/donation
logic attaining tales thereon Gervasius relaxedly expounding
displeasing cheerful sufficiently gilded concreated oppose
I_can't_believe_it licenses Rwanda PROJECT respected begannest
Far Neptune injure 20 Furthermore hour moan Fear enlighten
passengers speech you_hoser Repent Ignorant conceives
handkerchief indued ebbs maintained gnawing senseless
threatenest theres_no_place_like_home harlotries end loth
barred ensuing

----

There's a good chance publishing God should be censored. I could imagine parential objections. Of course, when they learn it's God, they'll think a little differently.

God says...

21:10 Their fruit shalt thou destroy from the earth, and their seed
from among the children of men.

21:11 For they intended evil against thee: they imagined a mischievous
device, which they are not able to perform.

21:12 Therefore shalt thou make them turn their back, when thou shalt
make ready thine arrows upon thy strings against the face of them.

21:13 Be thou exalted, LORD, in thine own strength: so will we sing
and praise thy power.