> than have to deal with a shifting web of alliances with ethnic/religious/corporate groups for my defense and safety net.

You already have to do this, do you not? Almost all of the elements of your life which you rely on for sustenance and safety are things which you acquire within the context of the specific network of relationships you participate in. The state doesn't feed you, house you, or otherwise care for you; it certainly doesn't provide you with anything higher up on Maslow's pyramid. Your experience of life includes participation in specific social contexts, and acquisition of happiness and security within the relationships therein established, no matter what.

I think that your mistake here is to anthropomorphise the abstractions of "ethnic groups", "corporations", etc. and to view these as something other than coalitions of individuals.

You're seeing civil society as a radio-button selection from which you can select one of a limited number of predefined institutional models, rather than to see it as a free-form text entry field within which you can create whatever network of relationships with particular people you mutually desire.

> maximize individualism, rather than the coalition-of-tribalist-groups type society, you need a background "container" of sorts that provides basic physical safety to everyone in a territory

A system of law, rooted in the custom and shared expectations of the participants and used by them as a means of mediating their social relations, is that "container". An organized group of people is just another group of people, and vesting control of the system of law in the hands of such a group actually inhibits its ability to serve as a mediative tool for and by the members of society; the law itself simply becomes an instrument in the hands of one particular "tribalist group".

Thinking of all law as positive law promulgated in top-down fashion by the state is a key deficiency of the modern mindset.

> now individuals do not fear being killed or starving to death, and can make more rational, less fear-based choices about which groups within that territory to further associate with

Of course, in reality, people indeed do continue to fear being killed or starving to death, because these risks still exist, and activities of the institutional state are motivated by these fears just as much as the activities of any other social institution.

And, with the state, you've very much created an institution for which cutting ties will lead to your being "cut off", likely to "starve or be shot".

In the former scenario, you at least had a pluralistic, multi-polar civil society filled with other institutions you could turn to, and the freedom create new ones, if you were "cut off". If the monopolist state "cuts you off", you've got no recourse.

> I don't think that would really be superior to the current governments.

I'd argue that a large number of smaller governments is superior to a small number of large ones, and that a situation in which people can establish new governments and sever their attachments to old ones, both with relative ease, is superior to one in which they cannot, or can only do so with great difficulty.

If absolute individual autonomy were universal, the situation could reasonably be described as 7+ billion independent governments; but we wouldn't tend to describe it that way, because we attach certain connotations of institutional rigidity to the notion of "government" which adhere less and less as social contexts become smaller and more organic.