Fair warning, what will write only applies to my circumstance and I have no intention to denigrate the life experiences of others.

I used to prescribe myself labels like ADHD. In fact I probably got into this habit at a very young age since people around me were already talking about labels and how they did or didn't apply to me, and I soaked all this up as children are wont to do.

I no longer abide by such labels anymore and still live comfortably. I discovered that what I called "ADHD" and motivated me to get on the Ritalin/TODO list/5-alarms-a-day train was my method of relieving myself from stress. Distracting myself was my way of coping with stress I found impossible to deal with or even approach at a lower level.

And historically, I had experienced the consequences of not distracting myself firsthand. In the past, when I forced myself take breaks and do literally nothing for a week at a time, I was stressed for what seemed like no reason for every waking hour. The stress would only be relieved when I went back to distracting myself with something (on my computer, at work, etc.). The difference was I was previously unable to recognize the cause of this stress and this address it effectively.

When I was able to address the underlying cause of stress (and this lurked in the background for years or even decades and would not have appeared consciously without heavy-duty and sustained focus), my desire for Facebook-Twitter-HN disappeared overnight. So did my stimulant prescription.

With that, the label "ADHD" disappeared as well. I called myself that a lot over the years. It turns out I was just fighting myself the whole time for seeing myself as "too weak" to deal with being unable to sustain "attention", and targeting my distraction as if it were the ultimate cause, not the symptom it really was. The stress was the real problem, and it remained latent for years without me so much as thinking of it.

On top of being distracted all the time from stress, my belief was if I couldn't stick to a stringent schedule with every minute detail mapped out for each day, I was a failure. Because my impression was that that's the standard you needed to set for yourself to address "ADHD", and if you weren't putting in your reps, your condition would dominate you and you'd live a miserable existence... which made miserable, which only made me believe more strongly in this narrative, and so on in an endless spiral.

I should mention everyone around me also believed in the "disease model" of psychology, so they only served to reinforce these beliefs. I think I renounced this model a bit too strongly in hindsight, as a few of my relationships have been left permanently altered as a result.

Now I don't bother to follow a strict schedule except for work things. I clean my place on Sunday. That's my only real obligation I've set for myself. Things that "need to be" done somehow get done automatically - because I don't need to pressure myself into doing them, I just want to, and they don't take much time. I no longer feel the need to sweat any of those details or micromanage my own life anymore, and instead just take life as it comes.

It shouldn't come as a surprise that I've never been happier with myself living this way.